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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/15410-h.zip b/15410-h.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..7424b86 --- /dev/null +++ b/15410-h.zip diff --git a/15410-h/15410-h.htm b/15410-h/15410-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..a0caca0 --- /dev/null +++ b/15410-h/15410-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,4731 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" + "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> +<html> +<head> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=ISO-8859-1" /> +<title>The Project Gutenberg eBook of A Little Pilgrim , by Mrs. Oliphant</title> + <style type="text/css"> +/*<![CDATA[ XML blockout */ +<!-- + p { margin-top: .75em; + text-align: justify; + margin-bottom: .75em; + } + h1,h2,h3,h4,h5,h6 { + text-align: center; /* all headings centered */ + clear: both; + } + hr { width: 33%; + margin-top: 2em; + margin-bottom: 2em; + margin-left: auto; + margin-right: auto; + clear: both; + } + + table {margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;} + + body{margin-left: 10%; + margin-right: 10%; + } + + .linenum {position: absolute; top: auto; left: 4%;} /* poetry number */ + .blockquot{margin-left: 5%; margin-right: 10%;} + .pagenum {position: absolute; left: 92%; font-size: smaller; text-align: right;} /* page numbers */ + .sidenote {width: 20%; padding-bottom: .5em; padding-top: .5em; + padding-left: .5em; padding-right: .5em; margin-left: 1em; + float: right; clear: right; margin-top: 1em; + font-size: smaller; background: #eeeeee; border: dashed 1px;} + + .bb {border-bottom: solid 2px;} + .bl {border-left: solid 2px;} + .bt {border-top: solid 2px;} + .br {border-right: solid 2px;} + .bbox {border: solid 2px;} + + .center {text-align: center;} + .smcap {font-variant: small-caps;} + .u {text-decoration: underline;} + + .caption {font-weight: bold;} + + .figcenter {margin: auto; text-align: center;} + + .figleft {float: left; clear: left; margin-left: 0; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: + 1em; margin-right: 1em; padding: 0; text-align: center;} + + .figright {float: right; clear: right; margin-left: 1em; margin-bottom: 1em; + margin-top: 1em; margin-right: 0; padding: 0; text-align: center;} + + .footnotes {border: dashed 1px;} + .footnote {margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%; font-size: 0.9em;} + .footnote .label {position: absolute; right: 84%; text-align: right;} + .fnanchor {vertical-align: super; font-size: .8em; text-decoration: none;} + + .poem {margin-left:10%; margin-right:10%; text-align: left;} + .poem br {display: none;} + .poem .stanza {margin: 1em 0em 1em 0em;} + .poem span {display: block; margin: 0; padding-left: 3em; text-indent: -3em;} + .poem span.i2 {display: block; margin-left: 2em;} + .poem span.i4 {display: block; margin-left: 4em;} + hr.full { width: 100%; } + pre {font-size: 8pt;} + // --> + /* XML end ]]>*/ + </style> +</head> +<body> +<h1>The Project Gutenberg eBook, A Little Pilgrim , by Mrs. Oliphant</h1> +<pre> +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at <a href = "https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a></pre> +<p>Title: A Little Pilgrim </p> +<p>Author: Mrs. Oliphant</p> +<p>Release Date: March 19, 2005 [eBook #15410]</p> +<p>Language: English</p> +<p>Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1</p> +<p>***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A LITTLE PILGRIM ***</p> +<p> </p> +<h3>E-text prepared by David Garcia, Josephine Paolucci,<br /> + and the Project Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team</h3> +<p> </p> +<hr class="full" /> +<p> </p> + +<!-- Autogenerated TOC. Modify or delete as required. --> +<p> + <a href="#In_Memoriam"><b>In Memoriam</b></a><br /> + <a href="#A_LITTLE_PILGRIM"><b>A LITTLE PILGRIM IN THE UNSEEN</b></a><br /> + <a href="#THE_LITTLE_PILGRIM"><b>THE LITTLE PILGRIM GOES UP HIGHER</b></a><br /> + <a href="#COMPLETE_EDITIONS_OF_THE_POETS"><b>COMPLETE EDITIONS OF THE POETS.</b></a><br /><br /> + </p> +<!-- End Autogenerated TOC. --> +<p> </p> +<p> </p> +<p> </p> + +<h1>A LITTLE PILGRIM</h1> + +<h2>IN THE UNSEEN</h2> + +<h3><i>By Mrs. Oliphant</i>.</h3> + +<p> </p> +<p> </p> +<h3> +Puro e disposto a salire alle stelle.<br /> +<br /> +<i>Purgaterio</i>, Canto xxxiii.<br /> +</h3> +<p> </p> +<p> </p> + + +<h6>London<br /> +MacMillan and Co., Limited<br /> +New York: The MacMillan Company</h6> + +<h4>1899</h4> +<p> </p> +<p> </p> + +<p>The sympathetic reader will easily understand +that the following pages were never +meant to be connected with any author's +name. They sprang out of those thoughts +that arise in the heart, when the door of +the Unseen has been suddenly opened close +by us; and are little more than a wistful +attempt to follow a gentle soul which never +knew doubt into the New World, and to +catch a glimpse of something of its glory +through her simple and child-like eyes.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="In_Memoriam" id="In_Memoriam"></a>In Memoriam</h2> + +<p>E.C.</p> + +<p>25TH FEBRUARY 1882</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="A_LITTLE_PILGRIM" id="A_LITTLE_PILGRIM"></a>A LITTLE PILGRIM</h2> + +<h2>IN THE UNSEEN</h2> + + +<p>She had been talking of dying only the +evening before, with a friend, and had +described her own sensations after a long +illness when she had been at the point of +death. "I suppose," she said, "that I was +as nearly gone as any one ever was to +come back again. There was no pain in +it, only a sense of sinking down, down—through +the bed as if nothing could hold +me or give me support enough—but no +pain." And then they had spoken of +another friend in the same circumstances, +who also had come back from the very +verge, and who described her sensations +as those of one floating upon a summer +sea without pain or suffering, in a lovely +nook of the Mediterranean, blue as the +sky. These soft and soothing images of +the passage which all men dread had been +talked over with low voices, yet with smiles +and a grateful sense that "the warm precincts +of the cheerful day" were once more +familiar to both. And very cheerfully she +went to rest that night, talking of what +was to be done on the morrow, and fell +asleep sweetly in her little room, with its +shaded light and curtained window, and +little pictures on the dim walls. All was +quiet in the house: soft breathing of the +sleepers, soft murmuring of the spring wind +outside, a wintry moon very clear and full +in the skies, a little town all hushed and +quiet, everything lying defenceless, unconscious, +in the safe keeping of God.</p> + +<p>How soon she woke no one can tell. +She woke and lay quite still, half roused, +half hushed, in that soft languor that +attends a happy waking. She was happy +always in the peace of a heart that was +humble and faithful and pure, but yet had +been used to wake to a consciousness of +little pains and troubles, such as even to +her meekness were sometimes hard to +bear. But on this morning there were +none of these. She lay in a kind of hush +of happiness and ease, not caring to make +any further movement, lingering over the +sweet sensation of that waking. She had +no desire to move nor to break the spell +of the silence and peace. It was still very +early, she supposed, and probably it might +be hours yet before any one came to call +her. It might even be that she should +sleep again. She had no wish to move, +she lay in such luxurious ease and calm. +But by and by, as she came to full possession +of her waking senses, it appeared to +her that there was some change in the +atmosphere, in the scene. There began +to steal into the air about her the soft +dawn as of a summer morning, the lovely +blueness of the first opening of daylight +before the sun. It could not be the light +of the moon which she had seen before +she went to bed; and all was so still that +it could not be the bustling wintry day +which comes at that time of the year late, +to find the world awake before it. This +was different; it was like the summer +dawn, a soft suffusion of light growing +every moment. And by and by it occurred +to her that she was not in the little room +where she had lain down. There were no +dim walls or roof, her little pictures were +all gone, the curtains at her window. The +discovery gave her no uneasiness in that +delightful calm. She lay still to think of +it all, to wonder, yet undisturbed. It half +amused her that these things should be +changed, but did not rouse her yet with +any shock of alteration. The light grew +fuller and fuller round, growing into day, +clearing her eyes from the sweet mist of +the first waking. Then she raised herself +upon her arm. She was not in her room, +she was in no scene she knew. Indeed it +was scarcely a scene at all—nothing but +light, so soft and lovely that it soothed +and caressed her eyes. She thought all +at once of a summer morning when she +was a child, when she had woke in the +deep night which yet was day, early—so +early that the birds were scarcely astir—and +had risen up with a delicious sense +of daring, and of being all alone in the +mystery of the sunrise, in the unawakened +world which lay at her feet to be explored, +as if she were Eve just entering upon +Eden. It was curious how all those +childish sensations, long forgotten, came +back to her as she found herself so unexpectedly +out of her sleep in the open air +and light. In the recollection of that +lovely hour, with a smile at herself, so +different as she now knew herself to be, +she was moved to rise and look a little +more closely about her and see where she +was.</p> + +<p>When I call her a little Pilgrim, I do +not mean that she was a child; on the +contrary, she was not even young. She +was little by nature, with as little flesh and +blood as was consistent with mortal life; +and she was one of those who are always +little for love. The tongue found diminutives +for her; the heart kept her in a perpetual +youth. She was so modest and so +gentle that she always came last so long as +there was any one whom she could put before +her. But this little body, and the soul +which was not little, and the heart which +was big and great, had known all the round +of sorrows that fill a woman's life, without +knowing any of its warmer blessings. She +had nursed the sick, she had entertained +the weary, she had consoled the dying. +She had gone about the world, which +had no prize nor recompense for her, with +a smile. Her little presence had been +always bright. She was not clever; you +might have said she had no mind at all; +but so wise and right and tender a heart +that it was as good as genius. This is to +let you know what this little Pilgrim had +been.</p> + +<p>She rose up, and it was strange how like +she felt to the child she remembered in +that still summer morning so many years +ago. Her little body, which had been +worn and racked with pain, felt as light +and unconscious of itself as then. She +took her first step forward with the same +sense of pleasure, yet of awe, suppressed +delight and daring and wild adventure, yet +perfect safety. But then the recollection +of the little room in which she had fallen +asleep came quickly, strangely over her, +confusing her mind. "I must be dreaming, +I suppose," she said to herself regretfully; +for it was all so sweet that she +wished it to be true. Her movement +called her attention to herself, and she +found that she was dressed, not in her +night-dress, as she had lain down, but in a +dress she did not know. She paused for +a moment to look at it and wonder. She +had never seen it before; she did not +make out how it was made, or what stuff +it was; but it fell so pleasantly about her, +it was so soft and light, that in her confused +state she abandoned that subject with only +an additional sense of pleasure. And now +the atmosphere became more distinct to +her. She saw that under her feet was a +greenness as of close velvet turf, both cool +and warm, cool and soft to touch, but with +no damp in it, as might have been at that +early hour, and with flowers showing here +and there. She stood looking round her, +not able to identify the landscape because +she was still confused a little, and then +walked softly on, all the time afraid lest +she should awake and lose the sweetness +of it all, and the sense of rest and happiness. +She felt so light, so airy, as if she +could skim across the field like any child. +It was bliss enough to breathe and move +with every organ so free. After more than +fifty years of hard service in the world to +feel like this, even in a dream! She smiled +to herself at her own pleasure; and then +once more, yet more potently, there came +back upon her the appearance of her room +in which she had fallen asleep. How had +she got from there to here? Had she +been carried away in her sleep, or was +it only a dream, and would she by and by +find herself between the four dim walls +again? Then this shadow of recollection +faded away once more, and she moved forward, +walking in a soft rapture over the +delicious turf. Presently she came to a +little mound upon which she paused to +look about her. Every moment she saw +a little farther: blue hills far away, extending +in long sweet distance, an indefinite +landscape, but fair and vast, so that there +could be seen no end to it, not even the +line of the horizon—save at one side, where +there seemed to be a great shadowy gateway, +and something dim beyond. She +turned from the brightness to look at this, +and when she had looked for some time +she saw what pleased her still more, though +she had been so happy before—people coming +in. They were too far off for her to +see clearly, but many came, each apart, +one figure only at a time. To watch them +amused her in the delightful leisure of her +mind. Who were they? she wondered; +but no doubt soon some of them would +come this way, and she would see. Then +suddenly she seemed to hear, as if in +answer to her question, some one say, +"Those who are coming in are the people +who have died on earth." "Died!" she +said to herself aloud, with a wondering +sense of the inappropriateness of the word, +which almost came the length of laughter. +In this sweet air, with such a sense of life +about, to suggest such an idea was almost +ludicrous. She was so occupied with this +that she did not look round to see who the +speaker might be. She thought it over, +amused, but with some new confusion of +the mind. Then she said, "Perhaps I +have died too," with a laugh to herself at +the absurdity of the thought.</p> + +<p>"Yes," said the other voice, echoing that +gentle laugh of hers, "you have died +too."</p> + +<p>She turned round and saw another standing +by her—a woman, younger and fairer +and more stately than herself, but of so +sweet a countenance that our little Pilgrim +felt no shyness, but recognised a friend at +once. She was more occupied looking at +this new face, and feeling herself at once +so much happier (though she had been so +happy before) in finding a companion who +could tell her what everything was, than +in considering what these words might +mean. But just then once more the recollection +of the four walls, with their little +pictures hanging, and the window with its +curtains drawn, seemed to come round her +for a moment, so that her whole soul was +in a confusion. And as this vision slowly +faded away (though she could not tell +which was the vision, the darkened room +or this lovely light), her attention came +back to the words at which she had laughed, +and at which the other had laughed as she +repeated them. Died?—was it possible +that this could be the meaning of it all.</p> + +<p>"Died?" she said, looking with wonder +in her companion's face, which smiled back +to her. "But do you mean—? You +cannot mean—? I have never been so +well. I am so strong. I have no trouble +anywhere. I am full of life."</p> + +<p>The other nodded her beautiful head +with a more beautiful smile, and the little +Pilgrim burst out in a great cry of joy, +and said—</p> + +<p>"Is this all? Is it over?—is it all over? +Is it possible that this can be all?"</p> + +<p>"Were you afraid of it?" the other said. +There was a little agitation for the +moment in her heart. She was so glad, +so relieved and thankful, that it took away +her breath. She could not get over the +wonder of it.</p> + +<p>"To think one should look forward to +it so long, and wonder and be even unhappy +trying to divine what it will be—and +this all!"</p> + +<p>"Ah, but the angel was very gentle with +you," said the young woman. "You were +so tender and worn that he only smiled +and took you sleeping. There are other +ways; but it is always wonderful to think +it is over, as you say."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim could do nothing but +talk of it, as one does after a very great +event. "Are you sure, quite sure, it is +so?" she said. "It would be dreadful to +find it only a dream, to go to sleep again, +and wake up—there—" This thought +troubled her for a moment. The vision +of the bedchamber came back, but this +time she felt it was only a vision. "Were +you afraid too?" she said, in a low voice.</p> + +<p>"I never thought of it at all," the beautiful +stranger said. "I did not think it +would come to me; but I was very sorry +for the others to whom it came, and grudged +that they should lose the beautiful earth +and life, and all that was so sweet."</p> + +<p>"My dear!" cried the Pilgrim, as if she +had never died, "oh, but this is far sweeter! +and the heart is so light, and it is happiness +only to breathe. Is it heaven here? +It must be heaven."</p> + +<p>"I do not know if it is heaven. We +have so many things to learn. They cannot +tell you everything at once," said the +beautiful lady. "I have seen some of the +people I was sorry for, and when I told +them, we laughed—as you and I laughed +just now—for pleasure."</p> + +<p>"That makes me think," said the little +Pilgrim. "If I have died as you say—which +is so strange and me so living—if +I have died, they will have found it out. +The house will be all dark, and they will +be breaking their hearts. Oh, how could +I forget them in my selfishness, and be +happy! I so lighthearted while they—"</p> + +<p>She sat down hastily and covered her +face with her hands and wept. The other +looked at her for a moment, then kissed +her for comfort and cried too. The two +happy creatures sat there weeping together, +thinking of those they had left behind, +with an exquisite grief which was not unhappiness, +which was sweet with love and +pity. "And oh," said the little Pilgrim, +"what can we do to tell them not to grieve? +Cannot you send, cannot you speak—cannot +one go to tell them?"</p> + +<p>The heavenly stranger shook her head.</p> + +<p>"It is not well, they all say. Sometimes +one has been permitted; but they do not +know you," she said, with a pitiful look in +her sweet eyes. "My mother told me +that her heart was so sick for me, she was +allowed to go; and she went and stood by +me, and spoke to me, and I did not know +her. She came back so sad and sorry that +they took her at once to our Father, and +there, you know, she found that it was all +well. All is well when you are there."</p> + +<p>"Ah," said the little Pilgrim, "I have +been thinking of other things—of how +happy I was, and of <i>them</i>, but never of +the Father—just as if I had not died."</p> + +<p>The other smiled upon her with a wonderful +smile.</p> + +<p>"Do you think He will be offended—our +Father? as if He were one of us?" +she said.</p> + +<p>And then the little Pilgrim, in her sudden +grief to have forgotten Him, became conscious +of a new rapture unexplainable in +words. She felt His understanding to +envelop her little spirit with a soft and +clear penetration, and that nothing she did +or said could ever be misconceived more. +"Will you take me to Him?" she said, +trembling yet glad, clasping her hands. +And once again the other shook her head.</p> + +<p>"They will take us both when it is time," +she said. "We do not go at our own will. +But I have seen our Brother—"</p> + +<p>"Oh, take me to Him!" the little Pilgrim +cried. "Let me see His face! I +have so many things to say to Him. I +want to ask him—Oh, take me to +where I can see His face!"</p> + +<p>And then once again the heavenly lady +smiled.</p> + +<p>"I have seen Him," she said. "He is +always about—now here, now there. He +will come and see you perhaps when you +are not thinking—but when He pleases. +We do not think here of what we will—"</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim sat very still, wondering +at all this. She had thought when a +soul left the earth that it went at once to +God, and thought of nothing more except +worship and singing of praises. But this +was different from her thoughts. She sat +and pondered and wondered. She was +baffled at many points. She was not +changed as she expected, but so much like +herself still—still perplexed, and feeling +herself foolish, not understanding, toiling +after a something which she could not +grasp. The only difference was that it +was no trouble to her now. She smiled +at herself, and at her dulness, feeling sure +that by and by she would understand.</p> + +<p>"And don't you wonder too?" she said +to her companion, which was a speech such +as she used to make upon the earth where +people thought her little remarks disjointed, +and did not always see the connection of +them. But her friend of heaven knew +what she meant.</p> + +<p>"I do nothing but wonder," she said, "for +it is all so natural—not what we thought."</p> + +<p>"Is it long since you have been here?" +the Pilgrim said.</p> + +<p>"I came before you—but how long or +how short I cannot tell, for that is not how +we count. We count only by what happens +to us. And nothing yet has happened to me, +except that I have seen our Brother. My +mother sees Him always. That means she +has lived here a long time and well—"</p> + +<p>"Is it possible to live ill—in heaven?" +The little Pilgrim's eyes grew large as if +they were going to have tears in them, +and a little shadow seemed to come over +her. But the other laughed softly and +restored her confidence.</p> + +<p>"I have told you I do not know if it is +heaven or not. No one does ill, but some +do little and some do much, just as it used +to be. Do you remember in Dante there +was a lazy spirit that stayed about the +gates and never got farther? but perhaps +you never read that."</p> + +<p>"I was not clever," said the little Pilgrim, +wistfully. "No, I never read it. I wish I +had known more."</p> + +<p>Upon which the beautiful lady kissed +her again to give her courage, and said—</p> + +<p>"It does not matter at all. It all comes +to you whether you have known it or not."</p> + +<p>"Then your mother came here long +ago?" said the Pilgrim. "Ah, then I +shall see my mother too."</p> + +<p>"Oh, very soon—as soon as she can +come; but there are so many things to do. +Sometimes we can go and meet those who +are coming, but it is not always so. I +remember that she had a message. She +could not leave her business, you may be +sure, or she would have been here."</p> + +<p>"Then you know my mother? Oh, and +my dearest father too?"</p> + +<p>"We all know each other," the lady said +with a smile.</p> + +<p>"And you? did you come to meet me—only +out of kindness, though I do not know +you?" the little Pilgrim said.</p> + +<p>"I am nothing but an idler," said the +beautiful lady, "making acquaintance. I +am of little use as yet. I was very hard +worked before I came here, and they think +ft well that we should sit in the sun and +take a little rest and find things out."</p> + +<p>Then the little Pilgrim sat still and +mused, and felt in her heart that she had +found many things out. What she had +heard had been wonderful, and it was +more wonderful still to be sitting here all +alone save for this lady, yet so happy and +at ease. She wanted to sing, she was so +happy, but remembered that she was old +and had lost her voice, and then remembered +again that she was no longer old, +and perhaps had found it again. And +then it occurred to her to remember how +she had learned to sing, and how beautiful +her sister's voice was, and how heavenly +to hear her, which made her remember +that this dear sister would be weeping, not +singing, down where she had come from—and +immediately the tears stood in her +eyes.</p> + +<p>"Oh," she said, "I never thought we +should cry when we came here. I thought +there were no tears in heaven."</p> + +<p>"Did you think, then, that we were all +turned into stone?" cried the beautiful +lady. "It says, God shall wipe away all +tears from our faces, which is not like saying +there are to be no tears."</p> + +<p>Upon which the little Pilgrim, glad that +it was permitted to be sorry, though she +was so happy, allowed herself to think +upon the place she had so lately left. +And she seemed to see her little room +again with all the pictures hanging as she +had left them, and the house darkened, +and the dear faces she knew all sad and +troubled; and to hear them saying over +to each other all the little careless words +she had said as if they were out of the +Scriptures, and crying if any one but mentioned +her name, and putting on crape and +black dresses, and lamenting as if that +which had happened was something very +terrible. She cried at this and yet felt +half inclined to laugh, but would not because +it would be disrespectful to those she +loved. One thing did not occur to her, +and that was that they would be carrying +her body, which she had left behind her, +away to the grave. She did not think of +this because she was not aware of the loss, +and felt far too much herself to think that +there was another part of her being buried +in the ground. From this she was aroused +by her companion asking her a question.</p> + +<p>"Have you left many there?" she said.</p> + +<p>"No one," said the little Pilgrim, "to +whom I was the first on earth, but they +loved me all the same; and if I could only, +only let them know—"</p> + +<p>"But I left one to whom I was the first +on earth," said the other with tears in her +beautiful eyes, "and oh, how glad I should +be to be less happy if he might be less sad!"</p> + +<p>"And you cannot go? you cannot go to +him and tell him? Oh, I wish—" cried +the little Pilgrim; but then she paused, for +the wish died all away in her heart into a +tender love for this poor sorrowful man +whom she did not know. This gave her +the sweetest pang she had ever felt, for +she knew that all was well, and yet was so +sorry, and would have willingly given up +her happiness for his. All this the lady +read in her eyes or her heart, and loved +her for it; and they took hands and were +silent together, thinking of those they had +left, as we upon earth think of those who +have gone from us, but only with far more +understanding, and far greater love. "And +have you never been able to do anything +for him?" our Pilgrim said.</p> + +<p>Then the beautiful lady's face flushed all +over with the most heavenly warmth and +light. Her smile ran over like the bursting +out of the sun. "Oh, I will tell you," +she said. "There was a moment when he +was very sad and perplexed, not knowing +what to think. There was something he +could not understand; nor could I understand, +nor did I know what it was until it +was said to me, 'You may go and tell him.' +And I went in the early morning, before +he was awake, and kissed him, and said +it in his ear. He woke up in a moment +and understood, and everything was clear +to him. Afterwards I heard him say, 'It +is true that the night brings counsel. I +had been troubled and distressed all day +long, but in the morning it was quite clear +to me.' And the other answered, 'Your +brain was refreshed, and that made your +judgment clear.' But they never knew it +was I! That was a great delight. The +dear souls! they are so foolish," she cried +with the sweetest laughter that ran into +tears. "One cries because one is so +happy; it is a silly old habit," she said.</p> + +<p>"And you were not grieved, it did not +hurt you—that he did not know—"</p> + +<p>"Oh, not then; not then! I did not go +to him for that. When you have been +here a little longer you will see the difference. +When you go for yourself, out of +impatience, because it still seems to you +that you must know best, and they don't +know you—then it strikes to your heart; +but when you go to help them—ah," she +cried, "when he comes how much I shall +have to tell him! 'You thought it was sleep +when it was I—when you woke so fresh and +clear it was I that kissed you; you thought +it your duty to me to be sad afterwards and +were angry with yourself because you had +wronged me of the first thoughts of your +waking—when it was all me, all through!'"</p> + +<p>"I begin to understand," said the little +Pilgrim; "but why should they not see +us, and why should not we tell them? It +would seem so natural. If they saw us it +would make them so happy, and so sure."</p> + +<p>Upon this the lady shook her head.</p> + +<p>"The worst of it is not that they are not +sure—it is the parting. If this makes us +sorry here, how can they escape the sorrow +of it even if they saw us?—for we must be +parted. We cannot go back to live with +them, or why should we have died? And +then we must all live our lives—they in +their way, we in ours. We must not +weigh them down, but only help them +when it is seen that there is need for it. +All this we shall know better by and by."</p> + +<p>"You make it so clear, and your face is +so bright," said our little Pilgrim gratefully. +"You must have known a great deal, and +understood even when you were in the +world."</p> + +<p>"I was as foolish as I could be," said +the other, with her laugh that was as sweet +as music; "yet thought I knew, and they +thought I knew; but all that does not +matter now."</p> + +<p>"I think it matters, for look how much +you have shown me; but tell me one +thing more—how was it said to you that +you must go and tell him? Was it some +one who spoke—was it—"</p> + +<p>Her face grew so bright that all the past +brightness was as a dull sky to this. It +gave out such a light of happiness that the +little Pilgrim was dazzled.</p> + +<p>"I was wandering about," she said, "to +see this new place. My mother had come +back between two errands she had, and had +come to see me and tell me everything; +and I was straying about wondering what +I was to do, when suddenly I saw some one +coming along, as it might be now—"</p> + +<p>She paused and looked up, and the little +Pilgrim looked up too with her heart beating, +but there was no one. Then she gave +a little sigh, and turned and listened again.</p> + +<p>"I had not been looking for Him, or +thinking. You know my mind is too light. +I am pleased with whatever is before me; +and I was so curious, for my mother had +told me many things: when suddenly I +caught sight of Him passing by. He was +going on, and when I saw this a panic +seized me, lest He should pass and say +nothing. I do not know what I did. I +flung myself upon His robe, and got hold +of it, or at least I think so. I was in such +an agony lest He should pass and never +notice me. But that was my folly. He +pass! As if that could be!"</p> + +<p>"And what did He say to you?" cried +the little Pilgrim, her heart almost aching +it beat so high with sympathy and expectation.</p> + +<p>The lady looked at her for a little without +saying anything.</p> + +<p>"I cannot tell you," she said, "any more +than I can tell if this is heaven. It is a +mystery. When you see Him you will +know. It will be all you have ever hoped +for and more besides, for He understands +everything. He knows what is in our +hearts about those we have left, and why He +sent for us before them. There is no need +to tell Him anything; He knows. He +will come when it is time; and after you +have seen Him you will know what to do."</p> + +<p>Then the beautiful lady turned her eyes +towards the gate, and, while the little Pilgrim +was still gazing, disappeared from her, and +went to comfort some other stranger. They +were dear friends always, and met often, +but not again in the same way.</p> + +<hr style='width: 45%;' /> + +<p>When she was thus left alone again, +the little Pilgrim sat still upon the grassy +mound, quite tranquil and happy, without +wishing to move. There was such a sense +of wellbeing in her that she liked to sit +there and look about her, and breathe the +delightful air, like the air of a summer +morning, without wishing for anything.</p> + +<p>"How idle I am!" she said to herself, +in the very words she had often used +before she died; but then she was idle +from weakness, and now from happiness. +She wanted for nothing. To be alive was +so sweet. There was a great deal to think +about in what she had heard, but she did +not even think about that, only resigned +herself to the delight of sitting there in the +sweet air and being happy. Many people +were coming and going, and they all knew +her, and smiled upon her, and those who +were at a distance would wave their hands. +This did not surprise her at all, for though +she was a stranger, she, too, felt that she +knew them all; but that they should be +so kind was a delight to her which words +could not tell. She sat and mused very +sweetly about all that had been told her, +and wondered whether she, too, might go +sometimes, and, with a kiss and a whisper, +clear up something that was dark in the +mind of some one who loved her. "I that +never was clever!" she said to herself, with a +smile. And chiefly she thought of a friend +whom she loved, who was often in great +perplexity, and did not know how to guide +herself amid the difficulties of the world.</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim half laughed with +delight, and then half cried with longing +to go, as the beautiful lady had done, and +make something clear that had been dark +before to this friend. As she was thinking +what a pleasure it would be, some one +came up to her, crossing over the flowery +greenness, leaving the path on purpose. +This was a being younger than the lady +who had spoken to her before, with flowing +hair all crisped with touches of sunshine, +and a dress all white and soft, like +the feathers of a white dove. There was +something in her face different from that +of the other, by which the little Pilgrim +knew somehow, without knowing how, +that she had come here as a child, and +grown up in this celestial place. She was +tall and fair, and came along with so +musical a motion, as if her foot scarcely +touched the ground, that she might have +had wings. And the little Pilgrim indeed +was not sure as she watched, whether it +might not perhaps be an angel, for she +knew that there were angels among the +blessed people who were coming and going +about, but had not been able yet to find +one out. She knew that this new-comer +was coming to her, and turned towards +her with a smile and a throb at her heart +of expectation. But when the heavenly +maiden drew nearer, her face, though it +was so fair, looked to the Pilgrim like +another face, which she had known very +well—indeed, like the homely and troubled +face of the friend of whom she had been +thinking. And so she smiled all the more, +and held out her hands and said—"I am +sure I know you," upon which the other +kissed her, and said, "We all know each +other; but I have seen you often before +you came here," and knelt down by her, +among the flowers that were growing, just +in front of some tall lilies that grew over +her, and made a lovely canopy over her +head. There was something in her face +that was like a child—her mouth so soft +as if it had never spoken anything but +heavenly words, her eyes brown and golden +as if they were filled with light. She took +the little Pilgrim's hands in hers, and held +them and smoothed them between her own. +These hands had been very thin and worn +before, but now, when the Pilgrim looked +at them, she saw that they became softer +and whiter every moment with the touch +of this immortal youth.</p> + +<p>"I knew you were coming," said the +maiden. "When my mother has wanted +me I have seen you there. And you were +thinking of her now—that was how I found +you."</p> + +<p>"Do you know, then, what one thinks?" +said the little Pilgrim with wondering eyes.</p> + +<p>"It is in the air; and when it concerns +us it comes to us like the breeze. But +we who are the children here, we feel it +more quickly than you."</p> + +<p>"Are you a child?" said the little Pilgrim, +"or are you an angel? Sometimes +you are like a child; but then your face +shines and you are like—you must have +some name for it here; there is nothing +among the words I know." And then she +paused a little, still looking at her, and +cried, "Oh, if she could but see you, little +Margaret! That would do her most good +of all."</p> + +<p>Then the maiden Margaret shook her +lovely head. "What does her most good +is the will of the Father," she said.</p> + +<p>At this the little Pilgrim felt once more +that thrill of expectation and awe. "Oh, +child, you have seen Him?" she cried.</p> + +<p>And the other smiled. "Have you forgotten +who they are that always behold +His face? We have never had any fear +or trembling. We are not angels, and there +is no other name; we are the children. +There is something given to us beyond +the others. We have had no other home."</p> + +<p>"Oh, tell me, tell me!" the little Pilgrim +cried.</p> + +<p>Upon this Margaret kissed her, putting +her soft cheek against hers, and said, "It +is a mystery; it cannot be put into words; +in your time you will know."</p> + +<p>"When you touch me you change me, +and I grow like you," the Pilgrim said. +"Ah, if she could see us together, you and +me! And will you go to her soon again? +And do you see them always—what they +are doing? and take care of them?"</p> + +<p>"It is our Father who takes care of +them, and our Lord who is our Brother. +I do His errands when I am able. Sometimes +He will let me go, sometimes another, +according as it is best. Who am I that I +should take care of them? I serve them +when I may."</p> + +<p>"But you do not forget them?" the +Pilgrim said, with wistful eyes.</p> + +<p>"We love them always," said Margaret. +She was more still than the lady who had +first spoken with the Pilgrim. Her countenance +was full of a heavenly calm. It had +never known passion nor anguish. Sometimes +there was in it a far-seeing look of +vision, sometimes the simplicity of a child. +"But what are we in comparison? For +He loves them more than we do. When +He keeps us from them it is for love. We +must each live our own life."</p> + +<p>"But it is hard for them sometimes," +said the little Pilgrim, who could not withdraw +her thoughts from those she had left.</p> + +<p>"They are never forsaken," said the +angel-maiden.</p> + +<p>"But oh! there are worse things than +sorrow," the little Pilgrim said; "there is +wrong, there is evil, Margaret. Will not +He send you to step in before them, to +save them from wrong?"</p> + +<p>"It is not for us to judge," said the +young Margaret, with eyes full of heavenly +wisdom. "Our Brother has it all in His +hand. We do not read their hearts like +Him. Sometimes you are permitted to +see the battle."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim covered her eyes with +her hands. "I could not—I could not! +unless I knew they were to win the day."</p> + +<p>"They will win the day in the end. +But sometimes, when it was being lost, I +have seen in His face a something—I cannot +tell—more love than before. Something +that seemed to say, 'My child, my +child, would that I could do it for thee, my +child!'"</p> + +<p>"Oh! that is what I have always felt," +cried the Pilgrim, clasping her hands; her +eyes were dim, her heart for a moment +almost forgot its blessedness. "But He +could—Oh, little Margaret! He could! +You have forgotten—Lord, if Thou wilt +Thou canst—"</p> + +<p>The child of heaven looked at her +mutely, with sweet grave eyes, in which +there was much that confused her who +was a stranger here; and once more softly +shook her head.</p> + +<p>"Is it that He will not, then?" said the +other with a low voice of awe. "Our Lord +who died—He—"</p> + +<p>"Listen," said the other, "I hear His +step on the way."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim rose up from the +mound on which she was sitting. Her +soul was confused with wonder and fear. +She had thought that an angel might step +between a soul on earth and sin, and that +if one but prayed and prayed, the dear +Lord would stand between and deliver the +tempted. She had meant when she saw +His face to ask Him to save Was not +He born, did not He live, and die to save? +The angel-maiden looked at her all the +while, with eyes that understood all her +perplexity and her doubt, but spoke not. +Thus it was that before the Lord came +to her the sweetness of her first blessedness +was obscured, and she found that +here, too, even here, though in a moment +she should see Him, there was need for +faith. Young Margaret, who had been +kneeling by her, rose up too and stood +among the lilies, waiting, her soft countenance +shining, her eyes turned towards +Him who was coming. Upon her there +was no cloud nor doubt. She was one of +the children of that land familiar with His +presence. And in the air there was a +sound such as those who hear it alone can +describe—a sound as of help coming and +safety, like the sound of a deliverer when +one is in deadly danger, like the sound of +a conqueror, like the step of the dearest-beloved +coming home. As it came nearer +the fear melted away out of the beating +heart of the Pilgrim. Who could fear so +near Him? her breath went away from +her, her heart out of her bosom, to meet +His coming. Oh, never fear could live +where He was! Her soul was all confused, +but it was with hope and joy. She +held out her hands in that amaze, and +dropped upon her knees, not knowing +what she did.</p> + +<p>He was going about His Father's business, +not lingering, yet neither making +haste; and the calm and peace which the +little Pilgrim had seen in the faces of the +blessed were but reflections from the +majestic gentleness of the countenance to +which, all quivering with happiness and +wonder, she lifted up her eyes. Many +things there had been in her mind to say +to Him. She wanted to ask for those she +loved some things which perhaps He had +overlooked. She wanted to say, "Send +me." It seemed to her that here was the +occasion she had longed for all her life. +Oh, how many times had she wished to be +able to go to Him, to fall at His feet, to +show Him something which had been left +undone, something which perhaps for her +asking He would remember to do. But +when this dream of her life was fulfilled, +and the little Pilgrim kneeling, and all +shaken and trembling with devotion and +joy, was at His feet, lifting her face to +Him, seeing Him, hearing Him—then she +said nothing to Him at all. She no longer +wanted to say anything, or wanted anything +except what He chose, or had power +to think of anything except that all was +well, and everything—everything, as it +should be in His hand. It seemed to her +that all that she had ever hoped for was +fulfilled when she met the look in His eyes. +At first it seemed too bright for her to +meet, but next moment she knew it was +all that was needed to light up the world, +and in it everything was clear. Her +trembling ceased, her little frame grew +inspired; though she still knelt, her head +rose erect, drawn to Him like the flower +to the sun. She could not tell how long +it was, nor what was said, nor if it was in +words. All that she knew was that she +told Him all that ever she had thought, or +wished, or intended in all her life, although +she said nothing at all; and that He opened +all things to her, and showed her that +everything was well, and no one forgotten; +and that the things she would have told +Him of were more near His heart than +hers, and those to whom she wanted to be +sent were in His own hand. But whether +this passed with words or without words +she could not tell. Her soul expanded +under His eyes like a flower. It opened +out, it comprehended, and felt, and knew. +She smote her hands together in her +wonder that she could have missed seeing +what was so clear, and laughed with a +sweet scorn at her folly, as two people who +love each other laugh at the little misunderstanding +that has parted them. She was +bold with Him, though she was so timid +by nature, and ventured to laugh at herself, +not to reproach herself—for His divine +eyes spoke no blame, but smiled upon her +folly too. And then He laid a hand upon +her head, which seemed to fill her with +currents of strength and joy running +through all her veins. And then she +seemed to come to herself saying loud out, +"And that I will! and that I will!" and +lo, she was kneeling on the warm soft sod +alone, and hearing the sound of His footsteps +as He went about His Father's +business, filling all the air with echoes of +blessing. And all the people who were +coming and going smiled upon her, and +she knew they were all glad for her that +she had seen Him, and got the desire of +her heart. Some of them waved their +hands as they passed, and some paused a +moment and spoke to her with tender congratulations. +They seemed to have the +tears in their eyes for joy, remembering +every one the first time they had themselves +seen Him, and the joy of it; so +that all about there sounded a concord of +happy thoughts all echoing to each other, +"She has seen the Lord!"</p> + +<p>Why did she say, "And that I will! and +that I will!" with such fervour and delight? +She could not have told but yet she knew. +The first thing was that she had yet to +wait and believe until all things should be +accomplished, neither doubting nor fearing, +but knowing that all should be well; and +the second was that she must delay no +longer, but rise up and serve the Father +according to what was given her as her +reward. When she had recovered a little +of her rapture she rose from her knees, and +stood still for a moment to be sure which +way she was to go. And she was not +aware what guided her, but yet turned her +face in the appointed way without any +doubt. For doubt was now gone away +for ever, and that fear that once gave her +so much trouble lest she might not be +doing what was best. As she moved +along she wondered at herself more and +more. She felt no longer, as at first, like +the child she remembered to have been, +venturing out in the awful lovely stillness +of the morning before any one was awake; +but she felt that to move along was a +delight, and that her foot scarcely touched +the grass, and her whole being was instinct +with such lightness of strength and life +that it did not matter to her how far she +went, nor what she carried, nor if the way +was easy or hard. The way she chose +was one of those which led to the great +gate, and many met her coming from +thence, with looks that were somewhat +bewildered, as if they did not yet know +whither they were going or what had +happened to them. Upon whom she +smiled as she passed them with soft looks +of tenderness and sympathy, knowing what +they were feeling, but did not stop to explain +to them, because she had something +else that had been given her to do. For +this is what always follows in that country +when you meet the Lord, that you instantly +know what it is that He would have you +do.</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim thus went on and on +towards the gate, which she had not seen +when she herself came through it, having +been lifted in His arms by the great Death +Angel, and set down softly inside, so that +she did not know it, or even the shadow +of it. As she drew nearer the light became +less bright, though very sweet, like a lovely +dawn, and she wondered to herself to think +that she had been here but a moment ago, +and yet so much had passed since then. +And still she was not aware what was her +errand, but wondered if she was to go back +by these same gates, and perhaps return +where she had been. She went up to +them very closely, for she was curious to +see the place through which she had come +in her sleep, as a traveller goes back to see +the city gate, with its bridge and portcullis, +through which he has passed by night. +The gate was very great, of a wonderful, +curious architecture, and strange, delicate +arches and canopies above. Some parts +of them seemed cut very clean and clear; +but the outlines were all softened with a +sort of mist and shadow, so that it looked +greater and higher than it was. The lower +part was not one great doorway as the +Pilgrim had supposed, but innumerable +doors, all separate, and very narrow, so +that but one could pass at a time, though +the arch enclosed all, and seemed filled +with great folding gates in which the +smaller doors were set, so that if need +arose a vast opening might be made for +many to enter. Of the little doors many +were shut as the Pilgrim approached; but +from moment to moment, one after another +would be pushed softly open from without, +and some one would come in. The little +Pilgrim looked at it all with great interest, +wondering which of the doors she had herself +come by; but while she stood absorbed +by this, a door was suddenly pushed open +close by her, and some one flung forward +into the blessed country, falling upon the +ground, and stretched out wild arms as +though to clutch the very soil. This sight +gave the Pilgrim a great surprise, for it +was the first time she had heard any sound +of pain, or seen any sight of trouble, since +she entered here. In that moment she +knew what it was that the dear Lord had +given her to do. She had no need to +pause to think, for her heart told her; and +she did not hesitate as she might have +done in the other life, not knowing what +to say. She went forward, and gathered +this poor creature into her arms, as if it +had been a child, and drew her quite within +the land of peace—for she had fallen +across the threshold, so as to hinder any +one entering who might be coming after +her. It was a woman, and she had flung +herself upon her face, so that it was difficult +for the little Pilgrim to see what +manner of person it was, for though she +felt herself strong enough to take up this +new-comer in her arms and carry her away, +yet she forbore, seeing the will of the +stranger was not so. For some time the +woman lay moaning, with now and then a +great sob shaking her as she lay. The +little Pilgrim had taken her by both her +arms, and drawn her head to rest upon her +own lap, and was still holding the hands, +which the poor creature had thrown out as +if to clutch the ground. Thus she lay for +a little while, as the little Pilgrim remembered +she herself had lain, not wishing to +move, wondering what had happened to +her; and then she clutched the hands +which grasped her, and said, muttering—</p> + +<p>"You are some one new. Have you +come to save me? Oh, save me! Oh, +save me! Don't let me die!"</p> + +<p>This was very strange to the little +Pilgrim, and went to her heart. She +soothed the stranger, holding her hands +warm and light, and stooping over her.</p> + +<p>"Dear," she said, "you must try and +not be afraid."</p> + +<p>"You say so," said the woman, "because +you are well and strong. You don't know +what it is to be seized in the middle of +your life, and told that you've got to die. +Oh, I have been a sinful creature! I am +not fit to die. Can't you give me something +that will cure me? What is the +good of doctors and nurses if they cannot +save a poor soul that is not fit to die?"</p> + +<p>At this the little Pilgrim smiled upon +her, always holding her fast, and said—</p> + +<p>"Why are you so afraid to die?"</p> + +<p>The woman raised her head to look who +it was who put such a strange question to +her.</p> + +<p>"You are some one new," she said. "I +have never seen you before. Is there anyone +that is not afraid to die? Would <i>you</i> +like to have to give your account all in a +moment, without any time to prepare?"</p> + +<p>"But you have had time to prepare," +said the Pilgrim.</p> + +<p>"Oh, only a very very little time; and +I never thought it was true. I am not an +old woman, and I am not fit to die; and +I'm poor. Oh, if I were rich, I would +bribe you to give me something to keep +me alive. Won't you do it for pity?—won't +you do it for pity? When you are +as bad as I am, oh, you will perhaps call +for some one to help you, and find nobody, +like me."</p> + +<p>"I will help you for love," said the little +Pilgrim. "Some one who loves you has +sent me."</p> + +<p>The woman lifted herself up a little and +shook her head. "There is nobody that +loves me." Then she cast her eyes round +her and began to tremble again (for the +touch of the little Pilgrim had stilled her). +"Oh, where am I?" she said. "They +have taken me away; they have brought +me to a strange place; and you are new. +Oh, where have they taken me?—where +am I?—where am I?" she cried. "Have +they brought me here to die?"</p> + +<p>Then the little Pilgrim bent over her +and soothed her. "You must not be so +much afraid of dying; that is all over. +You need not fear that any more," she +said, softly; "for here where you now are +we have all died."</p> + +<p>The woman started up out of her arms, +and then she gave a great shriek that +made the air ring, and cried out, "Dead! +am I dead?" with a shudder and convulsion, +throwing herself again wildly with +outstretched hands upon the ground.</p> + +<p>This was a great and terrible work for +the little Pilgrim—the first she had ever +had to do—and her heart failed her for a +moment; but afterwards she remembered +our Brother who sent her, and knew what +was best. She drew closer to the new-comer +and took her hand again.</p> + +<p>"Try," she said, in a soft voice, "and +think a little. Do you feel now so ill as +you were? Do not be frightened, but +think a little. I will hold your hand; and +look at me; you are not afraid of me."</p> + +<p>The poor creature shuddered again, and +then she turned her face and looked doubtfully +with great dark eyes dilated, and the +brow and cheek so curved and puckered +round them that they seemed to glow out +of deep caverns. Her face was full of +anguish and fear. But as she looked at +the little Pilgrim her troubled gaze softened. +Of her own accord she clasped her +other hand upon the one that held hers, +and then she said with a gasp—</p> + +<p>"I am not afraid of you; that was not +true that you said? You are one of the +sisters, and you want to frighten me and +make me repent?"</p> + +<p>"You do repent," the Pilgrim said.</p> + +<p>"Oh," cried the poor woman, "what has +the like of you to do with me? Now I +look at you I never saw any one that was +like you before. Don't you hate me?—don't +you loathe me? I do myself. It's +so ugly to go wrong. I think now I +would almost rather die and be done with +it. You will say that is because I am going +to get better. I feel a great deal +better now. Do you think I am going to +get over it? Oh, I am better! I could +get up out of bed and walk about. Yes, +but I am not in bed; where have you +brought me? Never mind, it is a fine +air; I shall soon get well here."</p> + +<p>The Pilgrim was silent for a little, holding +her hands. And then she said—</p> + +<p>"Tell me how you feel now," in her +soft voice.</p> + +<p>The woman had sat up and was gazing +round her. "It is very strange," she said; +"it is all confused. I think upon my +mother and the old prayers I used to say. +For a long, long time I always said my +prayers; but now I've got hardened, they +say. Oh, I was once as fresh as any one. +It all comes over me now. I feel as if I +were young again—just come out of the +country. I am sure that I could walk."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim raised her up, holding +her by her hands; and she stood and +gazed round about her, making one or +two doubtful steps. She was very pale, +and the light was dim; her eyes peered +into it with a scared yet eager look. +She made another step, then stopped +again.</p> + +<p>"I am quite well," she said. "I could +walk a mile. I could walk any distance. +What was that you said? Oh, I tell you +I am better! I am not going to die."</p> + +<p>"You will never, never die," said the +little Pilgrim; "are you not glad it is all +over? Oh, I was so glad! And all the +more you should be glad if you were so +much afraid."</p> + +<p>But this woman was not glad. She +shrank away from her companion, then +came close to her again, and gripped her +with her hands.</p> + +<p>"It is your fun," she said, "or just to +frighten me; perhaps you think it will do +me no harm as I am getting so well—you +want to frighten me to make me good. +But I mean to be good without that—I +do! I do! When one is so near dying as +I have been and yet gets better—for I +am going to get better? Yes! you know +it as well as I."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim made no reply, but +stood by looking at her charge, not feeling +that anything was given her to say; and +she was so new to this work that there +was a little trembling in her lest she should +not do everything as she ought. And the +woman looked round with those anxious +eyes gazing all about. The light did not +brighten as it had done when the Pilgrim +herself first came to this place. For one +thing they had remained quite close to the +gate, which no doubt threw a shadow. +The woman looked at that, and then +turned and looked into the dim morning, +and did not know where she was, and her +heart was confused and troubled.</p> + +<p>"Where are we?" she said. "I do not +know where it is; they must have brought +me here in my sleep—where are we? +How strange to bring a sick woman away +out of her room in her sleep! I suppose +it was the new doctor," she went on, looking +very closely in the little Pilgrim's face, +then paused, and, drawing a long breath, +said softly, "It has done me good. It is +better air—it is a new kind of cure."</p> + +<p>But though she spoke like this, she did +not convince herself; her eyes were wild +with wondering and fear. She gripped the +Pilgrim's arm more and more closely, and +trembled, leaning upon her.</p> + +<p>"Why don't you speak to me?" she +said; "why don't you tell me? Oh, I +don't know how to live in this place! +What do you do?—how do you speak? +I am not fit for it. And what are you? I +never saw you before nor any one like you. +What do you want with me? Why are +you so kind to me? Why—why—?"</p> + +<p>And here she went off into a murmur of +questions. Why? why? always holding +fast by the little Pilgrim, always gazing +round her, groping as it were in the dimness +with her great eyes.</p> + +<p>"I have come because our dear Lord, +who is our Brother, sent me to meet you, +and because I love you," the little Pilgrim +said.</p> + +<p>"Love me!" the woman cried, throwing +up her hands, "but no one loves me. I +have not deserved it." Here she grasped +her close again with a sudden clutch, and +cried out, "If this is what you say, where +is God?"</p> + +<p>"Are you afraid of Him?" the little +Pilgrim said.</p> + +<p>Upon which the woman trembled so +that the Pilgrim trembled too with the +quivering of her frame; then loosed her +hold and fell upon her face, and cried—</p> + +<p>"Hide me! Hide me! I have been a +great sinner. Hide me that He may not +see me," and with one hand tried to draw +the Pilgrim's dress as a veil between her +and something she feared.</p> + +<p>"How should I hide you from Him who +is everywhere? and why should I hide +you from your Father?" the little Pilgrim +said. This she said almost with indignation, +wondering that any one could put +more trust in her, who was no better than +a child, than in the Father of all. But +then she said, "Look in your heart and +you will see you are not so much afraid as +you think. This is how you have been +accustomed to frighten yourself. But look +now into your heart. You thought you +were very ill at first, but not now; and +you think you are afraid, but look in your +heart—"</p> + +<p>There was a silence, and then the +woman raised her head with a wonderful +look, in which there was amazement and +doubt, as if she had heard some joyful +thing but dared not yet believe that it was +true. Once more she hid her face in her +hands, and once more raised it again. Her +eyes softened; a long sigh or gasp, like one +taking breath after drowning, shook her +breast. Then she said, "I think that is +true. But if I am not afraid it is because +I am—bad. It is because I am hardened. +Oh, should not I fear Him who can send +me away into—the lake that burns—into +the pit—" And here she gave a great +cry, but held the little Pilgrim all the while +with her eyes, which seem to plead and +ask for better news.</p> + +<p>Then there came into the Pilgrim's heart +what to say, and she took the woman's +hand again and held it between her own. +"That is the change," she said, "that +comes when we come here. We are not +afraid any more of our Father. We are +not all happy. Perhaps you will not be +happy at first. But if he says to you go—even +to that place you speak of—you will +know that it is well, and you will not be +afraid. You are not afraid now—oh, I can +see it in your eyes. You are not happy, +but you are not afraid. You know it is +the Father. Do not say God, that is far +off—Father!" said the little Pilgrim, holding +up the woman's hand clasped in her +own. And there came into her soul an +ecstasy, and tears that were tears of blessedness +fell from her eyes, and all about +her there seemed to shine a light. When +she came to herself, the woman who was +her charge had come quite close to her, +and had added her other hand to that the +Pilgrim held, and was weeping, and saying, +"I am not afraid," with now and then a +gasp and sob, like a child who, after a +passion of tears, has been consoled, yet +goes on sobbing and cannot quite forget, +and is afraid to own that all is well again. +Then the Pilgrim kissed her, and bade +her rest a little, for even she herself felt +shaken, and longed for a little quiet and +to feel the true sense of the peace that was +in her heart. She sat down beside her +upon the ground, and made her lean her +head against her shoulder, and thus they +remained very still for a little time, saying +no more. It seemed to the little Pilgrim +that her companion had fallen asleep, and +perhaps it was so, after so much agitation. +All this time there had been people passing, +entering by the many doors. And +most of them paused a little to see where +they were, and looked round them, then +went on; and it seemed to the little Pilgrim +that, according to the doors by which they +entered, each took a different way. While +she watched, another came in by the same +door as that at which the woman who was +her charge had come in. And he too +stumbled and looked about him with an +air of great wonder and doubt. When he +saw her seated on the ground, he came up +to her, hesitating as one in a strange place +who does not want to betray that he is +bewildered and has lost his way. He came +with a little pretence of smiling, though +his countenance was pale and scared, and +said, drawing his breath quick, "I ought +to know where I am, but I have lost my +head, I think. Will you tell me which is +the way?"</p> + +<p>"What way?" cried the little Pilgrim, for +her strength was gone from her, and she +had no word to say to him. He looked +at her with that bewilderment on his face, +and said, "I find myself strange, strange. +I ought to know where I am; but it is +scarcely daylight yet. It is perhaps foolish +to come out so early in the morning." +This he said in his confusion, not knowing +where he was, nor what he said.</p> + +<p>"I think all the ways lead to our Father," +said the little Pilgrim (though she had not +known this till now). "And the dear Lord +walks about them all. Here you never go +astray."</p> + +<p>Upon this the stranger looked at her, +and asked in a faltering voice, "Are you +an angel?" still not knowing what he said.</p> + +<p>"Oh, no, no. I am only a Pilgrim," she +replied.</p> + +<p>"May I sit by you a little?" said the +man. He sat down drawing long breaths as +though he had gone through great fatigue; +and looked about with wondering eyes. +"You will wonder, but I do not know +where I am," he said. "I feel as if I +must be dreaming. This is not where I +expected to come. I looked for something +very different; do you think there +can have been any mistake?"</p> + +<p>"Oh, never that," she said; "there are +no mistakes here."</p> + +<p>Then he looked at her again, and said—</p> + +<p>"I perceive that you belong to this +country, though you say you are a pilgrim. +I should be grateful if you would tell me +Does one live here? And is this all? +Is there no—no—? but I don't know what +word to use. All is so strange, different +from what I expected."</p> + +<p>"Do you know that you have died?"</p> + +<p>"Yes, yes, I am quite acquainted with +that," he said, hurriedly, as if it had been +an idea he disliked to dwell upon. "But +then I expected—Is there no one to tell +you where to go, or what you are to be—? or +to take any notice of you?"</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim was startled by this +tone. She did not understand its meaning, +and she had not any word to say to +him. She looked at him with as much +bewilderment as he had shown when he +approached her, and replied, faltering—</p> + +<p>"There are a great many people here; +but I have never heard if there is any one +to tell you—"</p> + +<p>"What does it matter how many people +there are if you know none of them?" he +said.</p> + +<p>"We all know each other," she answered +him; but then paused and hesitated a little, +because this was what had been said to her, +and of herself she was not assured of it, +neither did she know at all how to deal +with this stranger, to whom she had not +any commission. It seemed that he had +no one to care for him, and the little Pilgrim +had a sense of compassion, yet of trouble, +in her heart—for what could she say? +And it was very strange to her to see one +who was not content here.</p> + +<p>"Ah, but there should be some one to +point out the way, and tell us which is our +circle, and where we ought to go," he said. +And then he too was silent for a while, +looking about him, as all were fain to do +on their first arrival, finding everything so +strange. There were people coming in at +every moment, and some were met at the +very threshold, and some went away alone, +with peaceful faces; and there were many +groups about, talking together in soft +voices, but no one interrupted the other; +and though so many were there, each voice +was as clear as if it had spoken alone, and +there was no tumult of sound as when +many people assemble together in the +lower world.</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim wondered to find herself +with the woman resting upon her on +one side, and the man seated silent on the +other, neither having, it appeared, any +guide but only herself who knew so little. +How was she to lead them in the paths +which she did not know?—and she was +exhausted by the agitation of her struggle +with the woman whom she felt to be her +charge. But in this moment of silence +she had time to remember the face of the +Lord, when He gave her this commission, +and her heart was strengthened. The +man all this time sat and watched, looking +eagerly all about him, examining the faces of +those who went and came: and sometimes +he made a little start as if to go and speak +to some one he knew; but always drew back +again and looked at the little Pilgrim, as if +he had said, "This is the one who will serve +me best." He spoke to her again after a +while and said, "I suppose you are one +of the guides that show the way."</p> + +<p>"No," said the little Pilgrim, anxiously, +"I know so little! It is not long since I +came here. I came in the early morning—"</p> + +<p>"Why, it is morning now. You could +not come earlier than it is now. You +mean yesterday."</p> + +<p>"I think," said the Pilgrim, "that yesterday +is the other side; there is no yesterday +here."</p> + +<p>He looked at her with the keen look he +had, to understand her the better; and +then he said—</p> + +<p>"No division of time! I think that +must be monotonous. It will be strange +to have no night; but I suppose one gets +used to everything. I hope though there +is something to do. I have always lived +a very busy life. Perhaps this is just a +little pause before we go—to be—to have—to +get our—appointed place."</p> + +<p>He had an uneasy look as he said this, +and looked at her with an anxious curiosity, +which the little Pilgrim did not understand.</p> + +<p>"I do not know," she said softly, shaking +her head. "I have so little experience. +I have not been told of an appointed +place."</p> + +<p>The man looked at her very strangely.</p> + +<p>"I did not think," he said, "that I should +have found such ignorance here. Is it not +well known that we must all appear before +the judgment seat of God?"</p> + +<p>These words seemed to cause a trembling +in the still air, and the woman on the +other side raised herself suddenly up, clasping +her hands: and some of those who had +just entered heard the words, and came +and crowded about the little Pilgrim, some +standing, some falling down upon their +knees, all with their faces turned towards +her. She who had always been so simple +and small, so little used to teach; she was +frightened with the sight of all these +strangers crowding, hanging upon her lips, +looking to her for knowledge. She knew +not what to do or what to say. The tears +came into her eyes.</p> + +<p>"Oh," she said, "I do not know anything +about a judgment seat. I know +that our Father is here, and that when we +are in trouble we are taken to Him to be +comforted, and that our dear Lord our +Brother is among us every day, and every +one may see Him. Listen," she said, +standing up suddenly among them, feeling +strong as an angel. "I have seen Him; +though I am nothing, so little as you see, +and often silly, never clever as some of +you are, I have seen Him! and so will all +of you. There is no more that I know +of," she said softly, clasping her hands. +"When you see Him it comes into your +heart what you must do."</p> + +<p>And then there was a murmur of voices +about her, some saying that was best, and +some wondering if that were all, and some +crying if He would but come now—while +the little Pilgrim stood among them with +her face shining, and they all looked at +her, asking her to tell them more, to show +them how to find Him. But this was far +above what she could do, for she too was +not much more than a stranger, and had +little strength. She would not go back a +step, nor desert those who were so anxious +to know, though her heart fluttered almost +as it had used to do before she died, what +with her longing to tell them, and knowing +that she had no more to say.</p> + +<p>But in that land it is never permitted +that one who stands bravely and fails not +shall be left without succour; for it is no +longer needful there to stand even to death, +since all dying is over, and all souls are +tested. When it was seen that the little +Pilgrim was thus surrounded by so many +that questioned her, there suddenly came +about her many others from the brightness +out of which she had come, who, one going +to one hand, and one to another, safely +led them into the ways in which their +course lay: so that the Pilgrim was free to +lead forth the woman who had been given +her in charge, and whose path lay in a +dim, but pleasant country, outside of that +light and gladness in which the Pilgrim's +home was.</p> + +<p>"But," she said, "you are not to fear or +be cast down, because He goes likewise +by these ways, and there is not a corner +in all this land but He is to be seen passing +by; and He will come and speak to you, +and lay His hand upon you; and afterwards +everything will be clear, and you +will know what you are to do."</p> + +<p>"Stay with me till He comes—oh, stay +with me," the woman cried, clinging to her +arm.</p> + +<p>"Unless another is sent," the little Pilgrim +said. And it was nothing to her that +the air was less bright there, for her mind +was full of light, so that, though her heart +still fluttered a little with all that had +passed, she had no longing to return, nor +to shorten the way, but went by the lower +road sweetly, with the stranger hanging +upon her, who was stronger and taller than +she. Thus they went on, and the Pilgrim +told her all she knew, and everything that +came into her heart. And so full was she +of the great things she had to say, that it +was a surprise to her, and left her trembling, +when suddenly the woman took away her +clinging hand, and flew forward with arms +outspread and a cry of joy. The little +Pilgrim stood still to see, and on the path +before them was a child, coming towards +them singing, with a look such as is never +seen but upon the faces of children who +have come here early, and who behold the +face of the Father, and have never known +fear nor sorrow. The woman flew and +fell at the child's feet, and he put his hand +upon her, and raised her up, and called her +"mother." Then he smiled upon the little +Pilgrim, and led her away.</p> + +<p>"Now she needs me no longer," said +the Pilgrim; and it was a surprise to her, +and for a moment she wondered in herself +if it was known that this child should come +so suddenly and her work be over; and +also how she was to return again to the +sweet place among the flowers from which +she had come. But when she turned to +look if there was any way, she found One +standing by such as she had not yet seen. +This was a youth, with a face just touched +with manhood, as at the moment when the +boy ends, when all is still fresh and pure +in the heart; but he was taller and greater +than a man.</p> + +<p>"I am sent," he said, "little sister, to +take you to the Father: because you have +been very faithful, and gone beyond your +strength."</p> + +<p>And he took the little Pilgrim by the +hand, and she knew he was an angel; and +immediately the sweet air melted about +them into light, and a hush came upon her +of all thought and all sense, attending till +she should receive the blessing, and her +new name, and see what is beyond telling, +and hear and understand:—</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="THE_LITTLE_PILGRIM" id="THE_LITTLE_PILGRIM"></a>THE LITTLE PILGRIM</h2> + +<h2>GOES UP HIGHER.</h2> + + +<p>When the little Pilgrim came out of the +presence of the Father, she found herself +in the street of a great city. But what +she saw and heard when she was with Him +it is not given to the tongue of mortal to +say, for it is beyond words, and beyond +even thought. As the mystery of love is +not to be spoken but to be felt, even in the +lower earth, so, but much less, is that great +mystery of the love of the Father to be +expressed in words. The little Pilgrim +was very happy when she went into that +sacred place, but there was a great awe +upon her, and it might even be said that +she was afraid; but when she came out +again she feared nothing, but looked with +clear eyes upon all she saw, loving them, +but no more overawed by them, having +seen that which is above all. When she +came forth again to her common life—for +it is not permitted save for those who have +attained the greatest heights to dwell there—she +had no longer need of any guide, +but came alone, knowing where to go, and +walking where it pleased her, with reverence +and a great delight in seeing and knowing +all that was around, but no fear. It was a +great city, but it was not like the great +cities which she had seen. She understood +as she passed along how it was that +those who had been dazzled but by a passing +glance had described the walls and the +pavement as gold. They were like what +gold is, beautiful and clear, of a lovely +colour, but softer in tone than metal ever +was, and as cool and fresh to walk upon +and to touch as if they had been velvet +grass. The buildings were all beautiful, +of every style and form that it is possible +to think of, yet in great harmony, as if +every man had followed his own taste, yet +all had been so combined and grouped by +the master architect, that each individual +feature enhanced the effect of the rest. +Some of the houses were greater and some +smaller, but all of them were rich in carvings +and pictures and lovely decorations, +and the effect was as if the richest materials +had been employed, marbles and beautiful +sculptured stone, and wood of beautiful +tints, though the little Pilgrim knew that +these were not like the marble and stone +she had once known, but heavenly representatives +of them, far better than they. +There were people at work upon them, +building new houses and making additions, +and a great many painters painting upon +them the history of the people who lived +there, or of others who were worthy that +commemoration. And the streets were +full of pleasant sound, and of crowds going +and coming, and the commotion of much +business, and many things to do. And +this movement, and the brightness of the +air, and the wonderful things that were to +be seen on every side, made the Pilgrim +gay, so that she could have sung with +pleasure as she went along. And all who +met her smiled, and every group exchanged +greetings as they passed along, all knowing +each other. Many of them, as might be +seen, had come there, as she did, to see +the wonders of the beautiful city; and all +who lived there were ready to tell them +whatever they desired to know, and show +them the finest houses and the greatest +pictures. And this gave a feeling of +holiday and pleasure which was delightful +beyond description, for all the busy people +about were full of sympathy with the +strangers—bidding them welcome, inviting +them into their houses, making the warmest +fellowship. And friends were meeting +continually on every side; but the Pilgrim +had no sense that she was forlorn in being +alone, for all were friends; and it pleased +her to watch the others, and see how one +turned this way and one another, every +one finding something that delighted him +above all other things. She herself took +a great pleasure in watching a painter, who +was standing upon a balcony a little way +above her, painting upon a great fresco: +and when he saw this he asked her to +come up beside him and see his work. +She asked him a great many questions +about it, and why it was that he was working +only at the draperies of the figures, +and did not touch their faces, some of +which were already finished and seemed to +be looking at her, as living as she was, out +of the wall, while some were merely outlined +as yet. He told her that he was not +a great painter to do this, or to design the +great work, but that the master would +come presently, who had the chief responsibility. +"For we have not all the same +genius," he said, "and if I were to paint +this head it would not have the gift of life +as that one has; but to stand by and see +him put it in, you cannot think what a +happiness that is: for one knows every +touch, and just what effect it will have, +though one could not do it one's self; and +it is a wonder and a delight perpetual that +it should be done."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim looked up at him and +said, "That is very beautiful to say. And +do you never wish to be like him—to make +the lovely, living faces as well as the other +parts?"</p> + +<p>"Is not this lovely too?" he said; and +showed her how he had just put in a +billowy robe, buoyed out with the wind, +and sweeping down from the shoulders of +a stately figure in such free and graceful +folds that she would have liked to take it +in her hand and feel the silken texture; +and then he told her how absorbing it was +to study the mysteries of colour and the +differences of light. "There is enough in +that to make one happy," he said. "It is +thought by some that we will all come to +the higher point with work and thought; +but that is not my feeling; and whether +it is so or not what does it matter, for our +Father makes no difference: and all of us +are necessary to everything that is done: +and it is almost more delight to see the +master do it than to do it with one's own +hand. For one thing, your own work +may rejoice you in your heart, but always +with a little trembling, because it is never +so perfect as you would have it—whereas +in your master's work you have full content, +because his idea goes beyond yours, and as +he makes every touch you can feel 'that is +right—that is complete—that is just as it +ought to be.' Do you understand what I +mean?" he said, turning to her with a smile.</p> + +<p>"I understand it perfectly," she cried, +clasping her hands together with the +delight of accord. "Don't you think that +is one of the things that are so happy here? +you understand at half a word."</p> + +<p>"Not everybody," he said, and smiled +upon her like a brother; "for we are not +all alike even here."</p> + +<p>"Were you a painter?" she said, "in—in +the other—?"</p> + +<p>"In the old times. I was one of those +that strove for the mastery, and sometimes +grudged—We remember these things +at times," he said gravely, "to make us +more aware of the blessedness of being +content."</p> + +<p>"It is long since then?" she said with +some wistfulness; upon which he smiled +again.</p> + +<p>"So long," he said, "that we have worn +out most of our links to the world below. +We have all come away, and those who +were after us for generations. But you +are a new-comer."</p> + +<p>"And are they all with you? are you +all together? do you live as in the old +time?"</p> + +<p>Upon this the painter smiled, but not so +brightly as before.</p> + +<p>"Not as in the old time," he said, "nor +are they all here. Some are still upon the +way, and of some we have no certainty, +only news from time to time. The angels +are very good to us. They never miss an +occasion to bring us news; for they go +everywhere, you know."</p> + +<p>"Yes," said the little Pilgrim, though +indeed she had not known it till now; but +it seemed to her as if it had come to her +mind by nature and she had never needed +to be told.</p> + +<p>"They are so tender-hearted," the painter +said; "and more than that, they are very +curious about men and women. They have +known it all from the beginning, and it is a +wonder to them. There is a friend of +mine, an angel, who is more wise in men's +hearts than any one I know; and yet he will +say to me sometimes, 'I do not understand +you—you are wonderful.' They like to find +out all we are thinking. It is an endless +pleasure to them, just as it is to some of +us to watch the people in the other worlds."</p> + +<p>"Do you mean—where we have come +from?" said the little Pilgrim.</p> + +<p>"Not always there. We in this city +have been long separated from that country, +for all that we love are out of it."</p> + +<p>"But not here?" the little Pilgrim cried +again with a little sorrow—a pang that she +had thought could never touch her again—in +her heart.</p> + +<p>"But coming! coming!" said the painter, +cheerfully; "and some were here before +us, and some have arrived since. They +are everywhere."</p> + +<p>"But some in trouble—some in trouble!" +she cried, with the tears in her eyes.</p> + +<p>"We suppose so," he said gravely; "for +some are in that place which once was +called among us the place of despair."</p> + +<p>"You mean—" and though the little +Pilgrim had been made free of fear, at that +word which she would not speak, she trembled, +and the light grew dim in her eyes.</p> + +<p>"Well!" said her new friend, "and what +then? The Father sees through and +through it as He does here: they cannot +escape Him: so that there is Love near +them always. I have a son," he said, then +sighed a little, but smiled again, "who is +there."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim at this clasped her +hands with a piteous cry.</p> + +<p>"Nay, nay," he said, "little sister; my +friend I was telling you of, the angel, +brought me news of him just now. Indeed +there was news of him through all the city. +Did you not hear all the bells ringing? +But perhaps that was before you came. +The angels who know me best came one +after another to tell me, and our Lord himself +came to wish me joy. My son had +found the way."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim did not understand +this, and almost thought that the painter +must be mistaken or dreaming. She looked +at him very anxiously and said—</p> + +<p>"I thought that those unhappy—never +came out any more."</p> + +<p>The painter smiled at her in return, and +said—</p> + +<p>"Had you children in the old time?"</p> + +<p>She paused a little before she replied.</p> + +<p>"I had children in love," she said, "but +none that were born mine."</p> + +<p>"It is the same," he said; "it is the +same; and if one of them had sinned +against you, injured you, done wrong in +any way, would you have cast him off, or +what would you have done?"</p> + +<p>"Oh!" said the little Pilgrim again, with +a vivid light of memory coming into her +face, which showed she had no need to +think of this as a thing that might have +happened, but knew. "I brought him +home. I nursed him well again. I prayed +for him night and day. Did you say cast +him off? when he had most need of me? +then I never could have loved him," she +cried.</p> + +<p>The painter nodded his head, and his +hand with the pencil in it, for he had turned +from his picture to look at her.</p> + +<p>"Then you think you love better than our +Father?" he said: and turned to his work, +and painted a new fold in the robe, which +looked as if a soft air had suddenly blown +into it, and not the touch of a skilful hand.</p> + +<p>This made the Pilgrim tremble, as though +in her ignorance she had done something +wrong. After that there came a great joy +into her heart. "Oh, how happy you +have made me!" she cried. "I am glad +with all my heart for you and your son—" +Then she paused a little and added, "But +you said he was still there."</p> + +<p>"It is true: for the land of darkness is +very confusing, they tell me, for want of +the true light, and our dear friends the +angels are not permitted to help: but if +one follows them, that shows the way. You +may be in that land yet on your way hither. +It was very hard to understand at first," +said the painter; "there are some sketches +I could show you. No one has ever made +a picture of it, though many have tried; +but I could show you some sketches—if +you wish to see."</p> + +<p>To this the little Pilgrim's look was so +plain an answer that the painter laid down +his pallet and his brush, and left his work, +to show them to her as he had promised. +They went down from the balcony and +along the street until they came to one of +the great palaces, where many were coming +and going. Here they walked through +some vast halls, where students were working +at easels, doing every kind of beautiful +work: some painting pictures, some preparing +drawings, planning houses and +palaces. The Pilgrim would have liked +to pause at every moment to see one lovely +thing or another, but the painter walked +on steadily till he came to a room which +was full of sketches, some of them like +pictures in little, with many figures—some +of them only a representation of a flower, +or the wing of a bird. "These are all the +master's," he said; "sometimes the sight +of them will be enough to put something +great into the mind of another. In this +corner are the sketches I told you of." +There' were two of them hanging together +upon the wall, and at first it seemed to the +little Pilgrim as if they represented the +flames and fire of which she had read, and +this made her shudder for the moment. +But then she saw that it was a red light +like a stormy sunset, with masses of clouds +in the sky, and a low sun very fiery and +dazzling, which no doubt to a hasty glance +must have looked, with its dark shadows +and high lurid lights, like the fires of the +bottomless pit. But when you looked +down you saw the reality what it was. +The country that lay beneath was full of +tropical foliage, but with many stretches of +sand and dry plains, and in the foreground +was a town, that looked very prosperous +and crowded, though the figures were very +minute, the subject being so great; but no +one to see it would have taken it for anything +but a busy and wealthy place, in +a thunderous atmosphere, with a storm +coming on. In the next there was a section +of a street with a great banqueting hall +open to the view, and many people sitting +about the table. You could see that there +was a great deal of laughter and conversation +going on, some very noisy groups, but +others that sat more quietly in corners and +conversed, and some who sang, and every +kind of entertainment. The little Pilgrim +was very much astonished to see this, and +turned to the painter, who answered her +directly, though she had not spoken. "We +used to think differently once. There are +some who are there and do not know it. +They think only it is the old life over again, +but always worse, and they are led on in +the ways of evil: but they do not feel the +punishment until they begin to find out +where they are and to struggle, and wish +for other things."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim felt her heart beat +very wildly while she looked at this, and +she thought upon the rich man in the +parable, who, though he was himself in +torment, prayed that his brother might be +saved, and she said to herself, "Our dear +Lord would never leave him there who +could think of his brother when he was +himself in such a strait." And when she +looked at the painter he smiled upon her, +and nodded his head. Then he led her to +the other corner of the room where there +were other pictures. One of them was of +a party seated round a table and an angel +looking on. The angel had the aspect of +a traveller, as if he were passing quickly +by, and had but paused a moment to look, +when one of the men glancing up suddenly +saw him. The picture was dim, but the +startled look upon this man's face, and the +sorrow on the angel's, appeared out of the +misty background with such truth that the +tears came into the little Pilgrim's eyes, +and she said in her heart, "Oh, that I +could go to him and help him!" The +other sketches were dimmer and dimmer. +You seemed to see out of the darkness +gleaming lights, and companies of revellers, +out of which here and there was one trying +to escape. And then the wide plains in the +night, and the white vision of the angel in +the distance, and here and there by different +paths a fugitive striving to follow. "Oh, +sir," said the little Pilgrim, "how did you +learn to do it? You have never been there."</p> + +<p>"It was the master, not I; and I cannot +tell you if he has ever been there. When +the Father has given you that gift, you +can go to many places, without leaving +the one where you are. And then he has +heard what the angels say."</p> + +<p>"And will they all get safe at the last? +and even that great spirit, he that fell from +Heaven—"</p> + +<p>The painter shook his head, and said, +"It is not permitted to you and me to +know such great things. Perhaps the wise +will tell you if you ask them: but for me +I ask the Father in my heart and listen to +what He says."</p> + +<p>"That is best!" the little Pilgrim said; +and she asked the Father in her heart: +and there came all over her such a glow of +warmth and happiness that her soul was +satisfied. She looked in the painter's face +and laughed for joy. And he put out his +hands as if welcoming some one, and his +countenance shone; and he said—</p> + +<p>"My son had a great gift. He was a +master born, though it was not given to +me. He shall paint it all for us so that +the heart shall rejoice; and you will come +again and see."</p> + +<p>After that it happened to the little Pilgrim +to enter into another great palace +where there were many people reading, +and some sitting at their desks and writing, +and some consulting together, with many +great volumes stretched out open upon the +tables. One of these who was seated alone +looked up as she paused, wondering at him, +and smiled as every one did, and greeted +her with such a friendly tone that the Pilgrim, +who always had a great desire to +know, came nearer to him and looked at +the book, then begged his pardon, and +said she did not know that books were +needed here. And then he told her +that he was one of the historians of the +city where all the records of the world +were kept, and that it was his business to +work upon the great history, and to show +what was the meaning of the Father in +everything that had happened, and how +each event came in its right place.</p> + +<p>"And do you get it out of books?" she +asked; for she was not learned, nor wise, +and knew but little, though she always +loved to know.</p> + +<p>"The books are the records," he said; +"and there are many here that were never +known to us in the old days; for the angels +love to look into these things, and they +can tell us much, for they saw it; and in +the great books they have kept there is +much put down that was never in the +books we wrote; for then we did not +know. We found out about the kings +and the state, and tried to understand +what great purposes they were serving; +but even these we did not know, for those +purposes were too great for us, not knowing +the end from the beginning; and the +hearts of men were too great for us. We +comprehended the evil sometimes, but +never fathomed the good. And how could +we know the lesser things which were +working out God's way? for some of these +even the angels did not know; and it has +happened to me that our Lord Himself +has come in sometimes to tell me of one +that none of us had discovered."</p> + +<p>"Oh," said the little Pilgrim, with tears +in her eyes, "I should like to have been +that one!—that was not known even to +the angels, but only to Himself!"</p> + +<p>The historian smiled. "It was my +brother," he said.</p> + +<p>The Pilgrim looked at him with great +wonder. "Your brother, and you did not +know him!"</p> + +<p>And then he turned over the pages and +showed her where the story was.</p> + +<p>"You know," he said, "that we who live +here are not of your time, but have lived +and lived here till the old life is far away +and like a dream. There were great +tumults and fightings in our time, and it +was settled by the prince of the place that +our town was to be abandoned, and all +the people left to the mercy of an enemy +who had no mercy. But every day as he +rode out he saw at one door a child, a little +fair boy, who sat on the steps, and sang +his little song like a bird. This child was +never afraid of anything—when the horses +pranced past him, and the troopers pushed +him aside, he looked up into their faces and +smiled. And when he had anything, a +piece of bread, or an apple, or a plaything, +he shared it with his playmates; and his +little face, and his pretty voice, and all his +pleasant ways, made that corner bright. +He was like a flower growing there; everybody +smiled that saw him."</p> + +<p>"I have seen such a child," the little +Pilgrim said.</p> + +<p>"But we made no account of him," said +the historian. "The Lord of the place +came past him every day, and always saw +him singing in the sun by his father's door. +And it was a wonder then, and it has been +a wonder ever since, why, having resolved +upon it, that prince did not abandon the +town, which would have changed all his +fortune after. Much had been made clear +to me since I began to study, but not this: +till the Lord Himself came to me and told +me. The prince looked at the child till +he loved him, and he reflected how many +children there were like this that would +be murdered, or starved to death, and he +could not give up the little singing boy +to the sword. So he remained; and the +town was saved, and he became a great +king. It was so secret that even the angels +did not know it. But without that child +the history would not have been complete."</p> + +<p>"And is he here?" the little Pilgrim +said.</p> + +<p>"Ah," said the historian, "that is more +strange still; for that which saved him +was also to his harm. He is not here. +He is—elsewhere."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim's face grew sad; but +then she remembered what she had been +told.</p> + +<p>"But you know," she said, "that he is +coming?"</p> + +<p>"I know that our Father will never +forsake him, and that everything that is +being accomplished in him is well."</p> + +<p>"Is it well to suffer? Is it well to live +in that dark stormy country? Oh, that +they were all here, and happy like you!"</p> + +<p>He shook his head a little and said—</p> + +<p>"It was a long time before I got here; +and as for suffering that matters little. +You get experience by it. You are more +accomplished and fit for greater work in +the end. It is not for nothing that we are +permitted to wander: and sometimes one +goes to the edge of despair—"</p> + +<p>She looked at him with such wondering +eyes that he answered her without a +word.</p> + +<p>"Yes," he said, "I have been there."</p> + +<p>And then it seemed to her that there +was something in his eyes which she had +not remarked before. Not only the great +content that was everywhere, but a deeper +light, and the air of a judge who knew +both good and evil, and could see both +sides, and understood all, both to love and +to hate.</p> + +<p>"Little sister," he said, "you have never +wandered far—it is not needful for such as +you. Love teaches you, and you need no +more; but when we have to be trained for +an office like this, to make the way of the +Lord clear through all the generations, +reason is that we should see everything, +and learn all that man is and can be. +These things are too deep for us; we +stumble on, and know not till after. But +now to me it is all clear."</p> + +<p>She looked at him again and again while +he spoke, and it seemed to her that she +saw in him such great knowledge and +tenderness as made her glad; and how he +could understand the follies that men had +done, and fathom what real meaning was +in them, and disentangle all the threads. +He smiled as she gazed at him, and answered +as if she had spoken.</p> + +<p>"What was evil perishes, and what was +good remains; almost everywhere there is +a little good. We could not understand +all if we had not seen all and shared all."</p> + +<p>"And the punishment too," she said, +wondering more and more.</p> + +<p>He smiled so joyfully that it was like +laughter.</p> + +<p>"Pain is a great angel," he said. "The +reason we hated him in the old days was +because he tended to death and decay; +but when it is towards life he leads, we +fear him no more. The welcome thing of +all in the land of darkness is when you see +him first and know who he is: for by this +you are aware that you have found the +way."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim did nothing but question +with her anxious eyes, for this was +such a wonder to her, and she could not +understand. But he only sat musing with +a smile over the things he remembered. +And at last he said—</p> + +<p>"If this is so interesting to you, you +shall read it all in another place, in the +room where we have laid up our own experiences, +in order to serve for the history +afterwards. But we are still busy upon +the work of the earth. There is always +something new to be discovered. And it +is essential for the whole world that the +chronicle should be full. I am in great joy +because it was but just now that our Lord +told me about that child. Everything was +imperfect without him, but now it is clear."</p> + +<p>"You mean your brother? And you +are happy though you are not sure if he is +happy?" the little Pilgrim said.</p> + +<p>"It is not to be happy that we live," said +he; and then, "We are all happy so soon +as we have found the way."</p> + +<p>She would have asked him more, but +that he was called to a consultation with +some others of his kind, and had to leave +her, waving his hand to her with a tender +kindness, which went to her heart. She +looked after him with great respect, and +almost awe; for it seemed to her that a +man who had been in the land of darkness, +and made his way out of it, must be more +wonderful than any other. She looked +round for a little upon the great library, +full of all the books that had ever been +written, and where people were doing their +work, examining and reading and making +extracts, every one with looks of so much +interest, that she almost envied them—though +it was a generous delight in seeing +people so happy in their occupation, and a +desire to associate herself somehow in it, +rather than any grudging of their satisfaction +that was in her mind. She went +about all the courts of this palace alone, +and everywhere saw the same work going +on, and everywhere met the same kind +looks. Even when the greatest of all +looked up from his work and saw her, he +would give her a friendly greeting and a +smile; and nobody was too wise to lend +an ear to the little visitor, or to answer her +questions. And this was how it was that +she began to talk to another, who was +seated at a great table with many more, +and who drew her to him by something +that was in his looks, though she could not +have told what it was. It was not that he +was kinder than the rest, for they were all +kind. She stood by him a little, and saw +how he worked and would take something +from one book and something from another, +putting them ready for use. And it did +not seem any trouble to do this work, but +only pleasure, and the very pen in his +hand was like a winged thing, as if it loved +to write. When he saw her watching him, +he looked up and showed her the beautiful +book out of which he was copying, which +was all illuminated with lovely pictures.</p> + +<p>"This is one of the volumes of the great +history," he said. "There are some things +in it which are needed for another, and it +is a pleasure to work at it. If you will +come here you will be able to see the page +while I write."</p> + +<p>Then the little Pilgrim asked him some +questions about the pictures, and he answered +her, describing and explaining them; +for they were in the middle of the history, +and she did not understand what it was. +When she said, "I ought not to trouble +you, for you are busy," he smiled so +kindly, that she smiled too for pleasure. +And he said—</p> + +<p>"There is no trouble here. When we +are not allowed to work, as sometimes +happens, that makes us not quite so happy, +but it is very seldom that it happens so."</p> + +<p>"Is it for punishment?" she said.</p> + +<p>And then he laughed out with a sound +which made all the others look up smiling; +and if they had not all looked so tenderly +at her, as at a child who has made such a +mistake as it is pretty for the child to make, +she would have feared she had said something +wrong; but she only laughed at herself +too, and blushed a little, knowing that +she was not wise: and to put her at her +ease again, he turned the leaf and showed +her other pictures, and the story which +went with them, from which he was copying +something. And he said—</p> + +<p>"This is for another book, to show how +the grace of the Father was beautiful in +some homes and families. It is not the +great history, but connected with it: and +there are many who love that better than +the story which is more great."</p> + +<p>Then the Pilgrim looked in his face and +said—</p> + +<p>"What I want most is, to know about +your homes here."</p> + +<p>"It is all home here," he said, and smiled; +and then, as he met her wistful looks, he +went on to tell her that he and his brothers +were not always there. "We have all our +occupations," he said, "and sometimes I +am sent to inquire into facts that have +happened, of which the record is not clear; +for we must omit nothing; and sometimes +we are told to rest and take in new +strength; and sometimes—"</p> + +<p>"But oh, forgive me," cried the little +Pilgrim, "you had some who were more +dear to you than all the world in the old +time?"</p> + +<p>And the others all looked up again at +the question, and looked at her with tender +eyes, and said to the man whom she questioned, +"Speak!"</p> + +<p>He made a little pause before he spoke, +and he looked at one here and there, and +called to them—</p> + +<p>"Patience, brother," and "Courage, +brother." And then he said, "Those +whom we loved best are nearly all with us; +but some have not yet come."</p> + +<p>"Oh," said the little Pilgrim, "but how +then do you bear it, to be parted so long—so +long?"</p> + +<p>Then one of those to whom the first +speaker had called out "Patience" rose, +and came to her smiling; and he said—</p> + +<p>"I think every hour that perhaps she will +come, and the joy will be so great, that +thinking of that makes the waiting short: +and nothing here is long, for it never ends; +and it will be so wonderful to hear her tell +how the Father has guided her, that it will +be a delight to us all; and she will be able +to explain many things, not only for us, but +for all; and we love each other so, that this +separation is as nothing in comparison with +what is to come."</p> + +<p>It was beautiful to hear this, but it was +not what the little Pilgrim expected, for she +thought they would have told her of the +homes to which they all returned when +their work was over, and a life which was +like the life of the old time; but of this +they said nothing, only looking at her with +smiling eyes, as at the curious questions of +a child. And there were many other things +she would have asked, but refrained when +she looked at them, feeling as if she did +not yet understand; when one of them +broke forth suddenly in a louder voice, and +said—</p> + +<p>"The little sister knows only the little +language and the beginning of days. She +has not learned the mysteries, and what +Love is, and what life is."</p> + +<p>And another cried, "It is sweet to hear +it again;" and they all gathered round her +with tender looks, and began to talk to +each other, and tell her, as men will tell of +the games of their childhood, of things that +happened, which were half forgotten, in the +old time.</p> + +<p>After this the little Pilgrim went out +again into the beautiful city, feeling in her +heart that everything was a mystery, and +that the days would never be long enough +to learn all that had yet to be learned, but +knowing now that this, too, was the little +language, and pleased with the sweet +thought of so much that was to come. For +one had whispered to her as she went out +that the new tongue, and every explanation, +as she was ready for it, would come to her +through one of those whom she loved best, +which is the usage of that country. And +when the stranger has no one there that is +very dear, then it is an angel who teaches +the greater language, and this is what +happens often to the children who are +brought up in that heavenly place. When +she reached the street again, she was so +pleased with this thought that it went out +of her mind to ask her way to the great +library, where she was to read the story of +the historian's journey through the land of +darkness; indeed she forgot that land altogether, +and thought only of what was +around her in the great city which is +beyond everything that eye has seen, or +that ear has heard, or that it has entered +into the imagination to conceive. And now +it seemed to her that she was much more +familiar with the looks of the people, and +could distinguish between those who belonged +to the city, and those who were +visitors like herself; and also could tell +which they were who had entered into the +mysteries of the kingdom, and which were, +like herself, only acquainted with the beginning +of days. And it came to her mind—she +could not tell how—that it was best not +to ask questions, but to wait until the +beloved one should come, who would teach +her the first words. For in the meantime +she did not feel at all impatient or disturbed +by her want of knowledge, but laughed a +little at herself to suppose that she could +find out everything, and went on looking +round her, and saying a word to every one +she met, and enjoying the holiday looks of +all the strangers, and the sense she had in +her heart of holiday too. She was walking +on in this pleasant way, when she heard a +sound that was like silver trumpets, and +saw the crowd turn towards an open space +in which all the beautiful buildings were +shaded with fine trees, and flowers were +springing at the very edge of the pavements. +The strangers all hastened along +to hear what it was, and she with them, +and some also of the people of the place. +And as the little Pilgrim found herself +walking by a woman who was of these last, +she asked her what it was.</p> + +<p>And the woman told her it was a poet +who had come to say to them what had +been revealed to him, and that the two +with the silver trumpets were angels of +the musicians' order, whose office it was to +proclaim everything that was new, that the +people should know. And many of those +who were at work in the palaces came out +and joined the crowd, and the painter who +had showed the little Pilgrim his picture, +and many whose faces she began to be +acquainted with. The poet stood up upon +a beautiful pedestal all sculptured in stone, +and with wreaths of living flowers hung +upon it—and when the crowd had gathered +in front of him, he began his poem. He +told them that it was not about this land, +or anything that happened in it, which they +knew as he did, but that it was a story of +the old time, when men were walking in +darkness, and when no one knew the true +meaning even of what he himself did, but +had to go on as if blindly, stumbling and +groping with their hands. And, "Oh, +brethren," he said, "though all is more +beautiful and joyful here where we know, +yet to remember the days when we knew +not, and the ways when all was uncertain, +and the end could not be distinguished +from the beginning, is sweet and dear; and +that which was done in the dim twilight +should be celebrated in the day; and our +Father Himself loves to hear of those who, +having not seen, loved, and who learned +without any teacher, and followed the light, +though they did not understand."</p> + +<p>And then he told them the story of one +who had lived in the old time; and in that +air, which seemed to be made of sunshine, +and amid all those stately palaces, he described +to them the little earth which they +had left behind—the skies that were +covered with clouds, and the ways that +were so rough and stony, and the cruelty +of the oppressor, and the cries of those that +were oppressed. And he showed the sickness +and the troubles, and the sorrow and +danger; and how death stalked about, and +tore heart from heart; and how sometimes +the strongest would fail, and the truest +fall under the power of a lie, and the +tenderest forget to be kind; and how evil +things lurked in every corner to beguile the +dwellers there; and how the days were +short and the nights dark, and life so little +that by the time a man had learned something +it was his hour to die. "What can +a soul do that is born there?" he cried; +"for war is there and fighting, and perplexity +and darkness; and no man knows if +that which he does will be for good or evil, +or can tell which is the best way, or know +the end from the beginning; and those he +loves the most are a mystery to him, and +their thoughts beyond his reach. And +clouds are between him and the Father, +and he is deceived with false gods and +false teachers, who make him to love a lie." +The people who were listening held their +breath, and a shadow like a cloud fell on +them, and they remembered and knew that +it was true. But the next moment their +hearts rebelled, and one and another would +have spoken, and the little Pilgrim herself +had almost cried out and made her plea for +the dear earth which she loved: when he +suddenly threw forth his voice again like a +great song. "Oh, dear mother earth," he +cried; "oh, little world and great, forgive +thy son! for lovely thou art and dear, and +the sun of God shines upon thee and the +sweet dews fall; and there were we born, +and loved, and died, and are come hence to +bless the Father and the Son. For in no +other world, though they are so vast, is it +given to any to know the Lord in the darkness, +and follow Him groping, and make +way through sin and death, and overcome +the evil, and conquer in His Name." At +which there was a great sound of weeping +and of triumph, and the little Pilgrim could +not contain herself, but cried out too in joy +as if for a deliverance. And then the poet +told his tale. And as he told them of the +man who was poor and sorrowful and alone, +and how he loved and was not loved again, +and trusted and was betrayed, and was +tempted and drawn into the darkness, so +that it seemed as if he must perish; but, +when hope was almost gone, turned again +from the edge of despair, and confronted all +his enemies, and fought and conquered, +the people followed every word with great +outcries of love and pity and wonder. For +each one as he listened remembered his +own career and that of his brethren in the +old life, and admired to think that all the +evil was past, and wondered how, out of +such tribulation and through so many +dangers, all were safe and blessed here. +And there were others that were not of +them, who listened, some seated at the +windows of the palaces and some standing +in the great square—people who were not +like the others, whose bearing was more +majestic, and who looked upon the crowd +all smiling and weeping with wonder and +interest, but had no knowledge of the cause, +and listened as it were to a tale that is +told. The poet and his audience were as +one, and at every period of the story there +was a deep breathing and pause, and every +one looked at his neighbour, and some +grasped each other's hands as they remembered +all that was in the past; but the +strangers listened and gazed and observed +all, as those who listen and are instructed +in something beyond their knowledge. +The little Pilgrim stood all this time not +knowing where she was, so intent was she +upon the tale, and as she listened it seemed +to her that all her own life was rolling out +before her, and she remembered the things +that had been, and perceived how all had +been shaped and guided, and trembled a +little for the brother who was in danger, +yet knew that all would be well.</p> + +<p>The woman who had been at her side +listened too with all her heart, saying to +herself as she stood in the crowd, "He +has left nothing out! The little days they +were so short, and the skies would change +all in a moment and one's heart with them. +How he brings it all back!" And she +put up her hand to dry away a tear from +her eyes, though her face all the time was +shining with the recollection. The little +Pilgrim was glad to be by the side of a +woman after talking with so many men, +and she put out her hand and touched the +cloak that this lady wore, and which was +white and of the most beautiful texture, +with gold threads woven in it, or something +that looked like gold.</p> + +<p>"Do you like," she said, "to think of +the old time?"</p> + +<p>The woman turned and looked down +upon her, for she was tall and stately, and +immediately took the hand of the little +Pilgrim into hers, and held it without +answering, till the poet had ended and +come down from the place where he had +been standing. He came straight through +the crowd to where this lady stood, and +said something to her. "You did well to +tell me," looking at her with love in his +eyes—not the tender sweetness of all those +kind looks around, but the love that is for +one. The little Pilgrim looked at them +with her heart beating, and was very glad +for them, and happy in herself, for she +had not seen this love before since she +came into the city, and it had troubled her +to think that perhaps it did not exist any +more. "I am glad," the lady said, and +gave him her other hand; "but here is a +little sister who asks me something, and I +must answer her. I think she has but +newly come."</p> + +<p>"She has a face full of the morning," +the poet said. It did the little Pilgrim +good to feel the touch of the warm, soft +hand, and she was not afraid, but lifted +her eyes and spoke to the lady, and to the +poet. "It is beautiful what you said to +us. Sometimes in the old time we used +to look up to the beautiful skies and +wonder what there was above the clouds, +but we never thought that up here in this +great city you would be thinking of what +we were doing, and making beautiful poems +all about us. We thought that you would +sing wonderful psalms, and talk of things +high, high above us."</p> + +<p>"The little sister does not know what +the meaning of the earth is," the poet +said. "It is but a little speck, but it is +the centre of all. Let her walk with us, +and we will go home, and you will tell her, +Ama, for I love to hear you talk."</p> + +<p>"Will you come with us?" the lady said.</p> + +<p>And the little Pilgrim's heart leaped up +in her, to think she was now going to see +a home in this wonderful city; and they +went along hand in hand, and though they +were three together, and many were coming +and going, there was no difficulty, for +every one made way for them. And there +was a little murmur of pleasure as the poet +passed, and those who had heard his poem +made obeisance to him, and thanked him, +and thanked the Father for him, that he +was able to show them so many beautiful +things. And they walked along the street +which was shining with colour, and saw, +as they passed, how the master painter +had come to his work, and was standing +upon the balcony where the little Pilgrim +had been, and bringing out of the wall, +under his hand, faces which were full of +life, and which seemed to spring forth as +if they had been hidden there. "Let us +wait a little and see him working," the +poet said: and all round about the people +stopped on their way, and there was a soft +cry of pleasure and praise all through the +beautiful street. And the painter with +whom the little Pilgrim had talked before +came, and stood behind her as if he had +been an old friend, and called out to her +at every new touch to mark how this and +that was done. She did not understand +as he did, but she saw how beautiful it +was, and she was glad to have seen the +great painter, as she had been glad to hear +the great poet. It seemed to the little +Pilgrim as if everything happened well for +her, and that no one had ever been so +blessed before. And to make it all more +sweet, this new friend, this great and +sweet lady, always held her hand, and +pressed it softly when something more +lovely appeared; and even the pictured +faces on the wall seemed to beam upon +her, as they came out one by one like the +stars in the sky. Then the three went on +again, and passed by many more beautiful +palaces, and great streets leading away +into the light, till you could see no farther; +and they met with bands of singers, who +sang so sweetly that the heart seemed to +leap out of the Pilgrim's breast to meet +with them, for above all things this was +what she had loved most. And out of one +of the palaces there came such glorious +music, that everything she had seen and +heard before seemed as nothing in comparison. +And amid all these delights they +went on and on, but without wearying, till +they came out of the streets into lovely +walks and alleys, and made their way to +the banks of a great river, which seemed +to sing too, a soft melody of its own.</p> + +<p>And here there were some fair houses +surrounded by gardens and flowers that +grew everywhere, and the doors were all +open, and within everything was lovely +and still, and ready for rest if you were +weary. The little Pilgrim was not weary, +but the lady placed her upon a couch in +the porch, where the pillars and the roof +were all formed of interlacing plants and +flowers; and there they sat with her and +talked, and explained to her many things. +They told her that the earth, though so +small, was the place in all the world to +which the thoughts of those above were +turned. "And not only of us who have +lived there, but of all our brothers in the +other worlds; for we are the race which +the Father has chosen to be the example. +In every age there is one that is the scene +of the struggle and the victory, and it is for +this reason that the chronicles are made, +and that we are all placed here to gather +the meaning of what has been done among +men. And I am one of those," the lady +said, "that go back to the dear earth and +gather up the tale of what our little brethren +are doing. I have not to succour, like some +others, but only to see and bring the news; +and he makes them into great poems as +you have heard; and sometimes the master +painter will take one and make of it a +picture; and there is nothing that is so +delightful to us as when we can bring +back the histories of beautiful things."</p> + +<p>"But, oh," said the little Pilgrim, "what +can there be on earth so beautiful as the +meanest thing that is here?"</p> + +<p>Then they both smiled upon her and +said, "It is more beautiful than the most +beautiful thing here to see how, under the +low skies and in the short days, a soul will +turn to our Father. And sometimes," said +Ama, "when I am watching, one will +wander and stray, and be led into the +dark till my heart is sick; then come back +and make me glad. Sometimes I cry out +within myself to the Father, and say, 'Oh, +my Father, it is enough!' and it will seem +to me that it is not possible to stand by +and see his destruction. And then while +you are gazing, while you are crying, he +will recover and return, and go on again. +And to the angels it is more wonderful +than to us, for they have never lived there. +And all the other worlds are eager to hear +what we can tell them. For no one knows +except the Father how the battle will turn, +or when it will all be accomplished; and +there are some who tremble for our little +brethren. For to look down and see how +little light there is, and how no one knows +what may happen to him next, makes them +afraid who never were there."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim listened with an intent +face, clasping her hands, and said—"But +it never could be that our Father +should be overcome by evil. Is not that +known in all the worlds?"</p> + +<p>Then the lady turned and kissed her: +and the poet broke forth in singing, +and said, "Faith is more heavenly than +heaven; it is more beautiful than the +angels. It is the only voice that can +answer to our Father. We praise Him, +we glorify Him, we love His name, but +there is but one response to Him through +all the worlds, and that is the cry of the +little brothers, who see nothing and know +nothing, but believe that He will never fail."</p> + +<p>At this the little Pilgrim wept, for her +heart was touched: but she said—"We +are not so ignorant: for we have +our Lord who is our Brother, and He +teaches us all that we require to know."</p> + +<p>Upon this the poet rose and lifted up +his hands and spoke once more; but it +was as if he spoke to others, to some one +at a distance; it was in the other language +which the little Pilgrim still did not understand, +but she could make out that it +sounded like a great proclamation that He +was wise as He was good, and called upon +all to see that the Lord had chosen the +only way. And the sound of the poet's +voice was like a great trumpet sounding +bold and sweet, as if to tell this to those +who were far away.</p> + +<p>"For you must know," said the Lady +Ama, who all the time held the Pilgrim's +hand, "that it is permitted to all to judge +according to the wisdom that has been +given them. And there are some who +think that our dear Lord might have found +another way, and that wait, sometimes with +trembling, lest He should fail; but not +among us who have lived on earth, for we +know. And it is our work to show to all +the worlds that His way never fails, and +how wonderful it is, and beautiful above +all that heart has conceived. And thus +we justify the ways of God, who is our +Father. But in the other worlds there are +many who will continue to fear until the +history of the earth is all ended and the +chronicles are made complete."</p> + +<p>"And will that be long?" the little +Pilgrim cried, feeling in her heart that she +would like to go to all the worlds and tell +them of our Lord, and of His love, and how +the thought of Him makes you strong; and +it troubled her a little to hear her friends +speak of the low skies and the short +days, and the dimness of that dear country +which she had left behind, in which there +were so many still whom she loved.</p> + +<p>Upon this Ama shook her head, and said +that of that day no one knew, not even +our Lord, but only the Father: and then +she smiled and answered the little Pilgrim's +thought. "When we go back," she said, +"it is not as when we lived there; for now +we see all the dangers of it and the mysteries +which we did not see before. It was +by the Father's dear love that we did not +see what was around us and about us while +we lived there, for then our hearts would +have fainted: and that makes us wonder +now that any one endures to the end."</p> + +<p>"You are a great deal wiser than I am," +said the little Pilgrim; "but though our +hearts had fainted how could we have been +overcome? for He was on our side."</p> + +<p>At this neither of them made any reply +at first, but looked at her; and at length +the poet said that she had brought many +thoughts back to his mind, and how he +had himself been almost worsted when one +like her came to him and gave strength to +his soul. "For that He was on our side +was the only thing she knew," he said, +"and all that could be learned or discovered +was not worthy of naming beside it. And +this I must tell when next I speak to the +people, and how our little sister brought it +to my mind."</p> + +<p>And then they paused from this discourse, +and the little Pilgrim looked round +upon the beautiful houses and the fair +gardens, and she said—</p> + +<p>"You live here? and do you come home +at night?—but I do not mean at night, I +mean when your work is done. And are +they poets like you that dwell all about in +these pleasant places, and the—"</p> + +<p>She would have said the children, but +stopped, not knowing if perhaps it might +be unkind to speak of the children when +she saw none there.</p> + +<p>Upon this the lady smiled once more, +and said—</p> + +<p>"The door stands open always, so that +no one is shut out, and the children come +and go when they will. They are children +no longer, and they have their appointed +work like him and me."</p> + +<p>"And you are always among those you +love?" the Pilgrim said; upon which they +smiled again and said, "We all love each +other;" and the lady held her hand in +both of hers, and caressed it, and softly +laughed, and said, "You know only the +little language. When you have been +taught the other you will learn many +beautiful things."</p> + +<p>She rested for some time after this, and +talked much with her new friends: and +then there came into the heart of the little +Pilgrim a longing to go to the place which +was appointed for her, and which was her +home, and to do the work which had been +given her to do. And when the lady saw +this she rose and said that she would +accompany her a little upon her way. But +the poet bade her farewell and remained +under the porch, with the green branches +shading him, and the flowers twining +round the pillars, and the open door of his +beautiful house behind him. When she +looked back upon him he waved his hand +to her as if bidding her God-speed, and +the lady by her side looked back too and +waved her hand, and the little Pilgrim felt +tears of happiness come to her eyes; for +she had been wondering with a little disappointment +to see that the people in the +city, except those who were strangers, were +chiefly alone, and not like those in the old +world where the husband and wife go together. +It consoled her to see again two +who were one. The lady pressed her +hand in answer to her thought, and bade +her pause a moment and look back into +the city as they passed the end of the great +street out of which they came. And then +the Pilgrim was more and more consoled, +for she saw many who had before been +alone now walking together hand in hand.</p> + +<p>"It is not as it was," Ama said. "For +all of us have work to do which is needed +for the worlds, and it is no longer needful +that one should sit at home while the other +goes forth; for our work is not for our life +as of old, or for ourselves, but for the +Father who has given us so great a trust. +And, little sister, you must know that though +we are not so great as the angels, nor as +many that come to visit us from the other +worlds, yet we are nearer to Him. For +we are in His secret, and it is ours to make +it clear."</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim's heart was very full +to hear this; but she said—</p> + +<p>"I was never clever, nor knew much. +It is better for me to go away to my little +border-land, and help the strangers who do +not know the way."</p> + +<p>"Whatever is your work is the best," +the lady said; "but though you are so +little you are in the Father's secret too; +for it is nature to you to know what the +others cannot be sure of, that we must have +the victory at the last. So that we have +this between us, the Father and we. And +though all are His children, we are of the +kindred of God, because of our Lord who +is our Brother;" and then the Lady Ama +kissed her, and bade her when she returned +to the great city, either for rest or for love, +or because the Father sent for her, that she +should come to the house by the river. +"For we are friends for ever," she said, +and so threw her white veil over her head, +and was gone upon her mission, whither +the little Pilgrim did not know.</p> + +<p>And now she found herself at a distance +from the great city which shone in the +light with its beautiful towers, and roofs, +and all its monuments, softly fringed with +trees, and set in a heavenly firmament. +And the Pilgrim thought of those words +that described this lovely place as a bride +adorned for her husband, and did not +wonder at him who had said that her +streets were of gold and her gates of pearl, +because gold and pearls and precious jewels +were as nothing to the glory and the beauty +of her. The little Pilgrim was glad to +have seen these wonderful things, and her +mind was like a cup running over with +almost more than it could contain. It +seemed to her that there never could be a +time when she should want for wonder and +interest and delight so long as she had this +to think of. Yet she was not sorry to turn +her back upon the beautiful city, but went +on her way singing in unutterable content, +and thinking over what the lady had said, +that we were in God's secret, more than all +the great worlds above and even the angels, +because of knowing how it is that in darkness +and doubt, and without any open +vision, a man may still keep the right way. +The path lay along the bank of the river +which flowed beside her and made the air +full of music, and a soft air blew across the +running stream and breathed in her face +and refreshed her, and the birds sang in all +the trees. And as she passed through the +villages the people came out to meet her, +and asked of her if she had come from the +city, and what she had seen there. And +everywhere she found friends, and kind +voices that gave her greeting. But some +would ask her why she still spoke the little +language, though it was sweet to their +ears; and others when they heard it +hastened to call from the houses and the +fields some among them who knew the +other tongue but a little, and who came +and crowded round the little Pilgrim and +asked her many questions both about the +things she had been seeing and about the +old time. And she perceived that the +village folk were a simple folk, not learned +and wise like those she had left. And that +though they lived within sight of the great +city, and showed every stranger the beautiful +view of it, and the glory of its towers, +yet few among them had travelled there; +for they were so content with their fields +and their river, and the shade of their trees +and the birds singing, and their simple life, +that they wanted no change; though it +pleased them to receive the little Pilgrim, +and they brought her in to their villages +rejoicing, and called every one to see her. +And they told her that they had all been +poor and laboured hard in the old time, and +had never rested; so that now it was the +Father's good pleasure that they should +enjoy great peace and consolation among +the fresh-breathing fields and on the riverside, +so that there were many who even +now had little occupation except to think +of the Father's goodness and to rest. And +they told her how the Lord Himself would +come among them, and sit down under a +tree, and tell them one of His parables, +and make them all more happy than words +could say; and how sometimes He would +send one out of the beautiful city, with a +poem or tale to say to them, and bands of +lovely music, more lovely than anything +beside, except the sound of the Lord's own +voice. "And what is more wonderful, the +angels themselves come often and listen to +us," they said, "when we begin to talk and +remind each other of the old time, and how +we suffered heat and cold, and were bowed +down with labour, and bending over the +soil; and how sometimes the harvest would +fail us, and sometimes we had not bread, +and sometimes would hush the children to +sleep because there was nothing to give +them; and how we grew old and weary, +and still worked on and on." "We are +those who were old," a number of them +called out to her, with a murmuring sound +of laughter, one looking over another's +shoulder. And one woman said, "The +angels say to us, 'Did you never think the +Father had forsaken you and the Lord forgotten +you?'" And all the rest answered +as in a chorus, "There were moments that +we thought this; but all the time we knew +that it could not be." "And the angels +wonder at us," said another. All this they +said, crowding one before another, every +one anxious to say something, and sometimes +speaking together, but always in +accord. And then there was a sound of +laughter and pleasure, both at the strange +thought that the Lord could have forgotten +them, and at the wonder of the angels over +their simple tales. And immediately they +began to remind each other, and say, "Do +you remember?" and they told the little +Pilgrim a hundred tales of the hardships +and troubles they had known, all smiling +and radiant with pleasure; and at every +new account the others would applaud and +rejoice, feeling the happiness all the more +for the evils that were past. And some of +them led her into their gardens to show +her their flowers, and to tell her how they +had begun to study and learn how colours +were changed and form perfected, and the +secrets of the growth and of the germ of +which they had been ignorant. And others +arranged themselves in choirs, and sang to +her delightful songs of the fields, and accompanied +her out upon her way, singing +and answering to each other. The difference +between the simple folk and the greatness +of the others made the little Pilgrim +wonder and admire, and she loved them in +her simplicity, and turned back many a +time to wave her hand to them, and to +listen to the lovely simple singing as it +went farther and farther away. It had an +evening tone of rest and quietness, and of +protection and peace. "He leadeth me +by the green pastures and beside the quiet +waters," she said to herself: and her heart +swelled with pleasure to think that it was +those who had been so old, and so weary +and poor, who had this rest to console +them for all their sorrows.</p> + +<p>And as she went along, not only did she +pass through many other villages, but met +many on the way who were travelling +towards the great city, and would greet +her sweetly as they passed, and sometimes +stop to say a pleasant word, so that the +little Pilgrim was never lonely wherever +she went. But most of them began to +speak to her in the other language, which +was as beautiful and sweet as music, but +which she could not understand: and they +were surprised to find her ignorant of it, +not knowing that she was but a new-comer +into these lands. And there were many +things that could not be told but in that +language, for the earthly tongue had no +words to express them. The little Pilgrim +was a little sad not to understand what was +said to her, but cheered herself with the +thought that it should be taught to her by +one whom she loved best. The way by +the riverside was very cheerful and bright, +with many people coming and going, and +many villages, some of them with a bridge +across the stream, some withdrawn among +the fields, but all of them bright and full of +life, and with sounds of music, and voices, +and footsteps: and the little Pilgrim felt +no weariness, but moved along as lightly +as a child, taking great pleasure in everything +she saw, and answering all the +friendly greetings with all her heart, yet +glad to think that she was approaching +ever nearer to the country where it was +ordained that she should dwell for a time +and succour the strangers, and receive +those who were newly arrived. And +she consoled herself with the thought that +there was no need of any language but +that which she knew. As this went +through her mind making her glad she +suddenly became aware of one who was +walking by her side, a lady who was +covered with a veil white and shining like +that which Ama had worn in the beautiful +city. It hung about this stranger's head +so that it was not easy to see her face, +and the sound of her voice was very sweet +in the Pilgrim's ear, yet startled her like +the sound of something which she knew +well, but could not remember. And as +there were few who were going that way, +she was glad, and said, "Let us walk +together, if that pleases you." And the +stranger said, "It is for that I have come," +which was a reply which made the little +Pilgrim wonder more and more, though +she was very glad and joyful to have this +companion upon her way. And then the +lady began to ask her many questions, not +about the city, or the great things she had +seen, but about herself, and what the dear +Lord had given her to do.</p> + +<p>"I am little and weak, and I cannot +do much," the little Pilgrim said. "It is +nothing but pleasure. It is to welcome +those that are coming, and tell them. +Sometimes they are astonished and do not +know. I was so myself. I came in my +sleep, and understood nothing. But now +that I know, it is sweet to tell them that +they need not fear."</p> + +<p>"I was glad," the lady said, "that you +came in your sleep: for sometimes the +way is dark and hard, and you are little +and tender. When your brother comes +you will be the first to see him, and show +him the way."</p> + +<p>"My brother! is he coming?" the little +Pilgrim cried. And then she said with a +wistful look, "But we are all brethren, and +you mean only one of those who are the +children of our Father. You must forgive +me that I do not know the higher speech, +but only what is natural, for I have not +yet been long here."</p> + +<p>"He whom I mean is called—" and +here the lady said a name which was the +true name of a brother born, whom the +Pilgrim loved above all others. She gave +a cry, and then she said trembling, "I +know your voice, but I cannot see your +face. And what you say makes me think +of many things. No one else has covered +her face when she has spoken to me. I +know you, and yet I cannot tell who you +are."</p> + +<p>The woman stood for a little without +saying a word, and then very softly, in a +voice which only the heart heard, she called +the little Pilgrim by her name.</p> + +<p>"MOTHER," cried the Pilgrim, with such +a cry of joy that it echoed all about in the +sweet air: and flung herself upon the veiled +lady, and drew the veil from her face, and +saw that it was she. And with this sight +there came a revelation which flooded her +soul with happiness. For the face which +had been old and feeble was old no longer, +but fair in the maturity of day; and the +figure that had been bent and weary was +full of a tender majesty, and the arms that +clasped her about were warm and soft with +love and life. And all that had changed +their relations in the other days and made +the mother in her weakness seem as a +child, and transferred all protection and +strength to the daughter, was gone for +ever: and the little Pilgrim beheld in a +rapture one who was her sister and equal, +yet ever above her—more near to her +than any, though all were so near—one of +whom she herself was a part, yet another, +and who knew all her thoughts and the +way of them before they arose in her. +And to see her face as in the days of her +prime, and her eyes so clear and wise, and +to feel once more that which is different +from the love of all, that which is still most +sweet where all is sweet, the love of one—was +like a crown to her in her happiness. +The little Pilgrim could not think for joy, +nor say a word, but held this dear mother's +hands and looked in her face, and her heart +soared away to the Father in thanks and +joy. They sat down by the roadside under +the shade of the trees, while the river ran +softly by, and everything was hushed out +of sympathy and kindness, and questioned +each other of all that had been and was +to be. And the little Pilgrim told all the +little news of home, and of the brothers +and sisters and the children that had been +born, and of those whose faces were turned +towards this better country; and the mother +smiled and listened and would have heard +all over and over, although many things +she already knew. "But why should I +tell you? for did not you watch over us and +see all we did, and were not you near us +always?" the little Pilgrim said.</p> + +<p>"How could that be?" said the mother; +"for we are not like our Lord, to be +everywhere. We come and go where we +are sent. But sometimes we knew and +sometimes saw, and always loved. And +whenever our hearts were sick for news it +was but to go to Him, and He told us +everything. And now, my little one, you +are as we are, and have seen the Lord. +And this has been given us, to teach our +child once more, and show you the heavenly +language, that you may understand all, both +the little and the great."</p> + +<p>Then the Pilgrim lifted her head from +her mother's bosom, and looked in her +face with eyes full of longing. "You said +'we,'" she said.</p> + +<p>The mother did nothing but smile; +then lifted her eyes and looked along the +beautiful path of the river to where some +one was coming to join them; and the +little Pilgrim cried out again, in wonder +and joy; and presently found herself seated +between them, her father and her mother, +the two who had loved her most in the +other days. They looked more beautiful +than the angels and all the great persons +whom she had seen; for still they were +hers and she was theirs, more than all the +angels and all the blessed could be. And +thus she learned that though the new may +take the place of the old, and many things +may blossom out of it like flowers, yet +that the old is never done away. And +then they sat together, telling of everything +that had befallen, and all the little +tender things that were of no import, and +all the great changes and noble ways, and +the wonders of heaven above and the earth +beneath, for all were open to them, both +great and small; and when they had satisfied +their souls with these, her father and +mother began to teach her the other language, +smiling often at her faltering tongue, +and telling her the same thing over and +over till she learned it; and her father +called her his little foolish one, as he had +done in the old days; and at last, when +they had kissed her and blessed her, and +told her how to come home to them when +she was weary, they gave her, as the +Father had permitted them, with joy and +blessing, her new name.</p> + +<p>The little Pilgrim was tired with happiness +and all the wonder and pleasure, and +as she sat there in the silence leaning +upon those who were so dear to her, the +soft air grew sweeter and sweeter about +her, and the light faded softly into a dimness +of tender indulgence and privilege for +her, because she was still little and weak. +And whether that heavenly suspense of all +her faculties was sleep or not she knew +not, but it was such as in all her life she +had never known. When she came back +to herself, it was by the sound of many +voices calling her, and many people hastening +past and beckoning to her to join them.</p> + +<p>"Come, come," they said, "little sister: +there has been great trouble in the other +life, and many have arrived suddenly and +are afraid. Come, come, and help them—come +and help them!"</p> + +<p>And she sprang up from her soft seat, +and found that she was no longer by the +riverside, or within sight of the great +city or in the arms of those she loved, but +stood on one of the flowery paths of her +own border-land, and saw her fellows +hastening towards the gates where there +seemed a great crowd. And she was no +longer weary, but full of life and strength, +and it seemed to her that she could take +them up in her arms, those trembling +strangers, and carry them straight to the +Father, so strong was she, and light, and +full of force. And above all the gladness +she had felt, and all her pleasure in what +she had seen, and more happy even than +the meeting with those she loved most, +was her happiness now, as she went +along as light as the breeze to receive +the strangers. She was so eager that she +began to sing a song of welcome as she +hastened on. "Oh, welcome, welcome!" +she cried; and as she sang she knew it +was one of the heavenly melodies which +she had heard in the great city: and she +hastened on, her feet flying over the flowery +ways, thinking how the great worlds were +all watching, and the angels looking on, and +the whole universe waiting till it should be +proved to them that the dear Lord, the +Brother of us all, had chosen the perfect +way, and that over all the evil and the +sorrow He was the Conqueror alone.</p> + +<p>And the little Pilgrim's voice, though +it was so small, echoed away through the +great firmament to where the other worlds +were watching to see what should come, +and cheered the anxious faces of some +great lords and princes far more great +than she, who were of a nobler race than +man; for it was said among the stars that +when such a little sound could reach so far, +it was a token that the Lord had chosen +aright, and that His method must be the +best. And it breathed over the earth like +some one saying, Courage! to those whose +hearts were failing; and it dropped down, +down, into the great confusions and traffic +of the Land of Darkness, and startled +many, like the cry of a child calling and +calling, and never ceasing, "Come! and +come! and come!"</p> + +<p>THE END.</p> + +<p><i>Printed by</i> R. & R. CLARK, LIMITED, <i>Edinburgh</i>.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="COMPLETE_EDITIONS_OF_THE_POETS" id="COMPLETE_EDITIONS_OF_THE_POETS"></a><b>COMPLETE EDITIONS OF THE POETS.</b><br /></h2> + +<p><i>Uniform Edition. In Green Cloth</i>.<br /></p> + + +<p>THE COMPLETE WORKS OF ALFRED, LORD +TENNYSON.</p> + +<p>With a Portrait engraved on Steel by G.J. STODART. +Crown 8vo. 7s. 6d.<br /></p> + + +<p>THE POETICAL WORKS OF MATTHEW +ARNOLD.</p> + +<p>With a Portrait engraved on Steel by G.J. 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May be +had separately.</p> + +<p>1. EARLY POEMS.</p> + +<p>2. EARLY POEMS.</p> + +<p>3. IDYLLS OF THE KING.</p> + +<p>4. THE PRINCESS, AND MAUD.</p> + +<p>5. ENOCH ARDEN, AND IN MEMORIAM.</p> + +<p>6. BALLADS, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>7. QUEEN MARY, AND HAROLD.</p> + +<p>8. BECKET, and other Plays.</p> + +<p>9. DEMETER, and other Poems.<br /></p> + + +<p><i>GLOBE 8vo EDITION</i>. On hand-made paper. In Ten Vols. Supplied +in sets only. 105s.</p> + +<p>POETICAL WORKS. <i>Globe Edition</i>. Crown 8vo. 3s. 6d. Extra +cloth, gilt edges. 4s. 6d. Limp leather, gilt edges. 5s net.<br /></p> + + +<p>POETICAL WORKS. <i>Peoples Edition.</i> In Twelve Vols. 16mo. +1s. net each. Complete in box, 14s. net.</p> + +<p>1. JUVENILIA AND LADY OF SHALOTT.</p> + +<p>2. A DREAM OF FAIR WOMEN AND LOCKSLEY HALL.</p> + +<p>3. THE PRINCESS.</p> + +<p>4. WILL WATERPROOF AND ENOCH ARDEN.</p> + +<p>5. IN MEMORIAM.</p> + +<p>6. MAUD AND THE BROOK.</p> + +<p>7. IDYLLS OF THE KING, I.</p> + +<p>8. " " " " II.</p> + +<p>9. " " " " III.</p> + +<p>10. THE LOVER'S TALE AND RIZPAH.</p> + +<p>11. THE VOYAGE OF MAELDUNE AND THE SPINSTER'S SWEET-ARTS.</p> + +<p>12. DEMETER AND THE DEATH OF OENONE.<br /></p> + + +<p>POETICAL WORKS. In Twenty-three Vols. Cloth, 1s. net, and +leather, 1s. 6d. net each Volume. In cloth case, 25s. net; Leather, in +cloth cabinet, 36s. net.</p> + +<p>1. JUVENILIA.</p> + +<p>2. THE LADY OF SHALOTT, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>3. A DREAM OF FAIR WOMEN, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>4. LOCKSLEY HALL, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>5. WILL WATERPROOF, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>6. THE PRINCESS. Books I. to III.</p> + +<p>7. THE PRINCESS. Book IV. to end.</p> + +<p>8. ENOCH ARDEN, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>9. IN MEMORIAM.</p> + +<p>10. MAUD, THE WINDOW, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>11. THE BROOK, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>12. IDYLLS OF THE KING: THE COMING OF ARTHUR, GARETH AND LYNETTE.</p> + +<p>13. IDYLLS OF THE KING: THE MARRIAGE OF GERAINT, GERAINT AND ENID.</p> + +<p>14. IDYLLS OF THE KING: BALIN AND BALAN, MERLIN AND VIVIEN.</p> + +<p>15. IDYLLS OF THE KING: LANCELOT AND ELAINE. THE HOLY GRAIL.</p> + +<p>16. IDYLLS OF THE KING: PELLEAS AND ETTARRE, THE LAST TOURNAMENT.</p> + +<p>17. IDYLLS OF THE KING: GUINEVERE, THE PASSING OF ARTHUR, TO THE QUEEN.</p> + +<p>18. THE LOVER'S TALE, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>19. RIZPAH, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>20. THE VOYAGE OF MAELDUNE, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>21. THE SPINSTER'S SWEET-ARTS, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>22. DEMETER, and other Poems.</p> + +<p>23. THE DEATH OF OENONE, and other Poems.<br /></p> + + +<p>MACMILLAN AND CO., LTD., LONDON.</p> + +<hr style='width: 45%;' /> + +<p><b>THE WORKS OF LORD TENNYSON.</b></p> + + +<p>POETICAL WORKS. <i>Pocket Edition</i>, Morocco binding, gilt +edges. Pott 8vo. 7s. 6d. net.</p> + +<p>POETICAL WORKS. <i>School Edition</i>. In Four Parts. 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You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + + + + +Title: A Little Pilgrim + +Author: Mrs. Oliphant + +Release Date: March 19, 2005 [eBook #15410] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII) + + +***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A LITTLE PILGRIM *** + + +E-text prepared by David Garcia, Josephine Paolucci, and the Project +Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team + + + +A LITTLE PILGRIM + +In the Unseen + +by + +MRS. OLIPHANT + +London +MacMillan and Co., Limited +New York: The MacMillan Company + +1899 + + + + + + + + Puro e disposto a salire alle stelle. + + _Purgaterio_, Canto xxxiii. + + + + +The sympathetic reader will easily understand that the following pages +were never meant to be connected with any author's name. They sprang out +of those thoughts that arise in the heart, when the door of the Unseen +has been suddenly opened close by us; and are little more than a wistful +attempt to follow a gentle soul which never knew doubt into the New +World, and to catch a glimpse of something of its glory through her +simple and child-like eyes. + + + + +In Memoriam + +E.C. + +25TH FEBRUARY 1882 + + + + +A LITTLE PILGRIM IN THE UNSEEN + + +She had been talking of dying only the evening before, with a friend, +and had described her own sensations after a long illness when she had +been at the point of death. "I suppose," she said, "that I was as nearly +gone as any one ever was to come back again. There was no pain in it, +only a sense of sinking down, down--through the bed as if nothing could +hold me or give me support enough--but no pain." And then they had +spoken of another friend in the same circumstances, who also had come +back from the very verge, and who described her sensations as those of +one floating upon a summer sea without pain or suffering, in a lovely +nook of the Mediterranean, blue as the sky. These soft and soothing +images of the passage which all men dread had been talked over with low +voices, yet with smiles and a grateful sense that "the warm precincts of +the cheerful day" were once more familiar to both. And very cheerfully +she went to rest that night, talking of what was to be done on the +morrow, and fell asleep sweetly in her little room, with its shaded +light and curtained window, and little pictures on the dim walls. All +was quiet in the house: soft breathing of the sleepers, soft murmuring +of the spring wind outside, a wintry moon very clear and full in the +skies, a little town all hushed and quiet, everything lying defenceless, +unconscious, in the safe keeping of God. + +How soon she woke no one can tell. She woke and lay quite still, half +roused, half hushed, in that soft languor that attends a happy waking. +She was happy always in the peace of a heart that was humble and +faithful and pure, but yet had been used to wake to a consciousness of +little pains and troubles, such as even to her meekness were sometimes +hard to bear. But on this morning there were none of these. She lay in a +kind of hush of happiness and ease, not caring to make any further +movement, lingering over the sweet sensation of that waking. She had no +desire to move nor to break the spell of the silence and peace. It was +still very early, she supposed, and probably it might be hours yet +before any one came to call her. It might even be that she should sleep +again. She had no wish to move, she lay in such luxurious ease and calm. +But by and by, as she came to full possession of her waking senses, it +appeared to her that there was some change in the atmosphere, in the +scene. There began to steal into the air about her the soft dawn as of a +summer morning, the lovely blueness of the first opening of daylight +before the sun. It could not be the light of the moon which she had seen +before she went to bed; and all was so still that it could not be the +bustling wintry day which comes at that time of the year late, to find +the world awake before it. This was different; it was like the summer +dawn, a soft suffusion of light growing every moment. And by and by it +occurred to her that she was not in the little room where she had lain +down. There were no dim walls or roof, her little pictures were all +gone, the curtains at her window. The discovery gave her no uneasiness +in that delightful calm. She lay still to think of it all, to wonder, +yet undisturbed. It half amused her that these things should be changed, +but did not rouse her yet with any shock of alteration. The light grew +fuller and fuller round, growing into day, clearing her eyes from the +sweet mist of the first waking. Then she raised herself upon her arm. +She was not in her room, she was in no scene she knew. Indeed it was +scarcely a scene at all--nothing but light, so soft and lovely that it +soothed and caressed her eyes. She thought all at once of a summer +morning when she was a child, when she had woke in the deep night which +yet was day, early--so early that the birds were scarcely astir--and had +risen up with a delicious sense of daring, and of being all alone in the +mystery of the sunrise, in the unawakened world which lay at her feet to +be explored, as if she were Eve just entering upon Eden. It was curious +how all those childish sensations, long forgotten, came back to her as +she found herself so unexpectedly out of her sleep in the open air and +light. In the recollection of that lovely hour, with a smile at herself, +so different as she now knew herself to be, she was moved to rise and +look a little more closely about her and see where she was. + +When I call her a little Pilgrim, I do not mean that she was a child; +on the contrary, she was not even young. She was little by nature, with +as little flesh and blood as was consistent with mortal life; and she +was one of those who are always little for love. The tongue found +diminutives for her; the heart kept her in a perpetual youth. She was so +modest and so gentle that she always came last so long as there was any +one whom she could put before her. But this little body, and the soul +which was not little, and the heart which was big and great, had known +all the round of sorrows that fill a woman's life, without knowing any +of its warmer blessings. She had nursed the sick, she had entertained +the weary, she had consoled the dying. She had gone about the world, +which had no prize nor recompense for her, with a smile. Her little +presence had been always bright. She was not clever; you might have said +she had no mind at all; but so wise and right and tender a heart that it +was as good as genius. This is to let you know what this little Pilgrim +had been. + +She rose up, and it was strange how like she felt to the child she +remembered in that still summer morning so many years ago. Her little +body, which had been worn and racked with pain, felt as light and +unconscious of itself as then. She took her first step forward with the +same sense of pleasure, yet of awe, suppressed delight and daring and +wild adventure, yet perfect safety. But then the recollection of the +little room in which she had fallen asleep came quickly, strangely over +her, confusing her mind. "I must be dreaming, I suppose," she said to +herself regretfully; for it was all so sweet that she wished it to be +true. Her movement called her attention to herself, and she found that +she was dressed, not in her night-dress, as she had lain down, but in a +dress she did not know. She paused for a moment to look at it and +wonder. She had never seen it before; she did not make out how it was +made, or what stuff it was; but it fell so pleasantly about her, it was +so soft and light, that in her confused state she abandoned that subject +with only an additional sense of pleasure. And now the atmosphere became +more distinct to her. She saw that under her feet was a greenness as of +close velvet turf, both cool and warm, cool and soft to touch, but with +no damp in it, as might have been at that early hour, and with flowers +showing here and there. She stood looking round her, not able to +identify the landscape because she was still confused a little, and then +walked softly on, all the time afraid lest she should awake and lose the +sweetness of it all, and the sense of rest and happiness. She felt so +light, so airy, as if she could skim across the field like any child. It +was bliss enough to breathe and move with every organ so free. After +more than fifty years of hard service in the world to feel like this, +even in a dream! She smiled to herself at her own pleasure; and then +once more, yet more potently, there came back upon her the appearance +of her room in which she had fallen asleep. How had she got from there +to here? Had she been carried away in her sleep, or was it only a dream, +and would she by and by find herself between the four dim walls again? +Then this shadow of recollection faded away once more, and she moved +forward, walking in a soft rapture over the delicious turf. Presently +she came to a little mound upon which she paused to look about her. +Every moment she saw a little farther: blue hills far away, extending in +long sweet distance, an indefinite landscape, but fair and vast, so that +there could be seen no end to it, not even the line of the horizon--save +at one side, where there seemed to be a great shadowy gateway, and +something dim beyond. She turned from the brightness to look at this, +and when she had looked for some time she saw what pleased her still +more, though she had been so happy before--people coming in. They were +too far off for her to see clearly, but many came, each apart, one +figure only at a time. To watch them amused her in the delightful +leisure of her mind. Who were they? she wondered; but no doubt soon some +of them would come this way, and she would see. Then suddenly she seemed +to hear, as if in answer to her question, some one say, "Those who are +coming in are the people who have died on earth." "Died!" she said to +herself aloud, with a wondering sense of the inappropriateness of the +word, which almost came the length of laughter. In this sweet air, with +such a sense of life about, to suggest such an idea was almost +ludicrous. She was so occupied with this that she did not look round to +see who the speaker might be. She thought it over, amused, but with some +new confusion of the mind. Then she said, "Perhaps I have died too," +with a laugh to herself at the absurdity of the thought. + +"Yes," said the other voice, echoing that gentle laugh of hers, "you +have died too." + +She turned round and saw another standing by her--a woman, younger and +fairer and more stately than herself, but of so sweet a countenance that +our little Pilgrim felt no shyness, but recognised a friend at once. She +was more occupied looking at this new face, and feeling herself at once +so much happier (though she had been so happy before) in finding a +companion who could tell her what everything was, than in considering +what these words might mean. But just then once more the recollection of +the four walls, with their little pictures hanging, and the window with +its curtains drawn, seemed to come round her for a moment, so that her +whole soul was in a confusion. And as this vision slowly faded away +(though she could not tell which was the vision, the darkened room or +this lovely light), her attention came back to the words at which she +had laughed, and at which the other had laughed as she repeated them. +Died?--was it possible that this could be the meaning of it all. + +"Died?" she said, looking with wonder in her companion's face, which +smiled back to her. "But do you mean--? You cannot mean--? I have never +been so well. I am so strong. I have no trouble anywhere. I am full of +life." + +The other nodded her beautiful head with a more beautiful smile, and the +little Pilgrim burst out in a great cry of joy, and said-- + +"Is this all? Is it over?--is it all over? Is it possible that this can +be all?" + +"Were you afraid of it?" the other said. There was a little agitation +for the moment in her heart. She was so glad, so relieved and thankful, +that it took away her breath. She could not get over the wonder of it. + +"To think one should look forward to it so long, and wonder and be even +unhappy trying to divine what it will be--and this all!" + +"Ah, but the angel was very gentle with you," said the young woman. +"You were so tender and worn that he only smiled and took you sleeping. +There are other ways; but it is always wonderful to think it is over, as +you say." + +The little Pilgrim could do nothing but talk of it, as one does after a +very great event. "Are you sure, quite sure, it is so?" she said. "It +would be dreadful to find it only a dream, to go to sleep again, and +wake up--there--" This thought troubled her for a moment. The vision of +the bedchamber came back, but this time she felt it was only a vision. +"Were you afraid too?" she said, in a low voice. + +"I never thought of it at all," the beautiful stranger said. "I did not +think it would come to me; but I was very sorry for the others to whom +it came, and grudged that they should lose the beautiful earth and life, +and all that was so sweet." + +"My dear!" cried the Pilgrim, as if she had never died, "oh, but this is +far sweeter! and the heart is so light, and it is happiness only to +breathe. Is it heaven here? It must be heaven." + +"I do not know if it is heaven. We have so many things to learn. They +cannot tell you everything at once," said the beautiful lady. "I have +seen some of the people I was sorry for, and when I told them, we +laughed--as you and I laughed just now--for pleasure." + +"That makes me think," said the little Pilgrim. "If I have died as you +say--which is so strange and me so living--if I have died, they will +have found it out. The house will be all dark, and they will be breaking +their hearts. Oh, how could I forget them in my selfishness, and be +happy! I so lighthearted while they--" + +She sat down hastily and covered her face with her hands and wept. The +other looked at her for a moment, then kissed her for comfort and cried +too. The two happy creatures sat there weeping together, thinking of +those they had left behind, with an exquisite grief which was not +unhappiness, which was sweet with love and pity. "And oh," said the +little Pilgrim, "what can we do to tell them not to grieve? Cannot you +send, cannot you speak--cannot one go to tell them?" + +The heavenly stranger shook her head. + +"It is not well, they all say. Sometimes one has been permitted; but +they do not know you," she said, with a pitiful look in her sweet eyes. +"My mother told me that her heart was so sick for me, she was allowed to +go; and she went and stood by me, and spoke to me, and I did not know +her. She came back so sad and sorry that they took her at once to our +Father, and there, you know, she found that it was all well. All is well +when you are there." + +"Ah," said the little Pilgrim, "I have been thinking of other things--of +how happy I was, and of _them_, but never of the Father--just as if I +had not died." + +The other smiled upon her with a wonderful smile. + +"Do you think He will be offended--our Father? as if He were one of +us?" she said. + +And then the little Pilgrim, in her sudden grief to have forgotten Him, +became conscious of a new rapture unexplainable in words. She felt His +understanding to envelop her little spirit with a soft and clear +penetration, and that nothing she did or said could ever be misconceived +more. "Will you take me to Him?" she said, trembling yet glad, clasping +her hands. And once again the other shook her head. + +"They will take us both when it is time," she said. "We do not go at our +own will. But I have seen our Brother--" + +"Oh, take me to Him!" the little Pilgrim cried. "Let me see His face! I +have so many things to say to Him. I want to ask him--Oh, take me to +where I can see His face!" + +And then once again the heavenly lady smiled. + +"I have seen Him," she said. "He is always about--now here, now there. +He will come and see you perhaps when you are not thinking--but when He +pleases. We do not think here of what we will--" + +The little Pilgrim sat very still, wondering at all this. She had +thought when a soul left the earth that it went at once to God, and +thought of nothing more except worship and singing of praises. But this +was different from her thoughts. She sat and pondered and wondered. She +was baffled at many points. She was not changed as she expected, but so +much like herself still--still perplexed, and feeling herself foolish, +not understanding, toiling after a something which she could not grasp. +The only difference was that it was no trouble to her now. She smiled at +herself, and at her dulness, feeling sure that by and by she would +understand. + +"And don't you wonder too?" she said to her companion, which was a +speech such as she used to make upon the earth where people thought her +little remarks disjointed, and did not always see the connection of +them. But her friend of heaven knew what she meant. + +"I do nothing but wonder," she said, "for it is all so natural--not what +we thought." + +"Is it long since you have been here?" the Pilgrim said. + +"I came before you--but how long or how short I cannot tell, for that is +not how we count. We count only by what happens to us. And nothing yet +has happened to me, except that I have seen our Brother. My mother sees +Him always. That means she has lived here a long time and well--" + +"Is it possible to live ill--in heaven?" The little Pilgrim's eyes grew +large as if they were going to have tears in them, and a little shadow +seemed to come over her. But the other laughed softly and restored her +confidence. + +"I have told you I do not know if it is heaven or not. No one does ill, +but some do little and some do much, just as it used to be. Do you +remember in Dante there was a lazy spirit that stayed about the gates +and never got farther? but perhaps you never read that." + +"I was not clever," said the little Pilgrim, wistfully. "No, I never +read it. I wish I had known more." + +Upon which the beautiful lady kissed her again to give her courage, and +said-- + +"It does not matter at all. It all comes to you whether you have known +it or not." + +"Then your mother came here long ago?" said the Pilgrim. "Ah, then I +shall see my mother too." + +"Oh, very soon--as soon as she can come; but there are so many things to +do. Sometimes we can go and meet those who are coming, but it is not +always so. I remember that she had a message. She could not leave her +business, you may be sure, or she would have been here." + +"Then you know my mother? Oh, and my dearest father too?" + +"We all know each other," the lady said with a smile. + +"And you? did you come to meet me--only out of kindness, though I do not +know you?" the little Pilgrim said. + +"I am nothing but an idler," said the beautiful lady, "making +acquaintance. I am of little use as yet. I was very hard worked before I +came here, and they think ft well that we should sit in the sun and take +a little rest and find things out." + +Then the little Pilgrim sat still and mused, and felt in her heart that +she had found many things out. What she had heard had been wonderful, +and it was more wonderful still to be sitting here all alone save for +this lady, yet so happy and at ease. She wanted to sing, she was so +happy, but remembered that she was old and had lost her voice, and then +remembered again that she was no longer old, and perhaps had found it +again. And then it occurred to her to remember how she had learned to +sing, and how beautiful her sister's voice was, and how heavenly to hear +her, which made her remember that this dear sister would be weeping, +not singing, down where she had come from--and immediately the tears +stood in her eyes. + +"Oh," she said, "I never thought we should cry when we came here. I +thought there were no tears in heaven." + +"Did you think, then, that we were all turned into stone?" cried the +beautiful lady. "It says, God shall wipe away all tears from our faces, +which is not like saying there are to be no tears." + +Upon which the little Pilgrim, glad that it was permitted to be sorry, +though she was so happy, allowed herself to think upon the place she had +so lately left. And she seemed to see her little room again with all the +pictures hanging as she had left them, and the house darkened, and the +dear faces she knew all sad and troubled; and to hear them saying over +to each other all the little careless words she had said as if they were +out of the Scriptures, and crying if any one but mentioned her name, +and putting on crape and black dresses, and lamenting as if that which +had happened was something very terrible. She cried at this and yet felt +half inclined to laugh, but would not because it would be disrespectful +to those she loved. One thing did not occur to her, and that was that +they would be carrying her body, which she had left behind her, away to +the grave. She did not think of this because she was not aware of the +loss, and felt far too much herself to think that there was another part +of her being buried in the ground. From this she was aroused by her +companion asking her a question. + +"Have you left many there?" she said. + +"No one," said the little Pilgrim, "to whom I was the first on earth, +but they loved me all the same; and if I could only, only let them +know--" + +"But I left one to whom I was the first on earth," said the other with +tears in her beautiful eyes, "and oh, how glad I should be to be less +happy if he might be less sad!" + +"And you cannot go? you cannot go to him and tell him? Oh, I wish--" +cried the little Pilgrim; but then she paused, for the wish died all +away in her heart into a tender love for this poor sorrowful man whom +she did not know. This gave her the sweetest pang she had ever felt, for +she knew that all was well, and yet was so sorry, and would have +willingly given up her happiness for his. All this the lady read in her +eyes or her heart, and loved her for it; and they took hands and were +silent together, thinking of those they had left, as we upon earth think +of those who have gone from us, but only with far more understanding, +and far greater love. "And have you never been able to do anything for +him?" our Pilgrim said. + +Then the beautiful lady's face flushed all over with the most heavenly +warmth and light. Her smile ran over like the bursting out of the sun. +"Oh, I will tell you," she said. "There was a moment when he was very +sad and perplexed, not knowing what to think. There was something he +could not understand; nor could I understand, nor did I know what it was +until it was said to me, 'You may go and tell him.' And I went in the +early morning, before he was awake, and kissed him, and said it in his +ear. He woke up in a moment and understood, and everything was clear to +him. Afterwards I heard him say, 'It is true that the night brings +counsel. I had been troubled and distressed all day long, but in the +morning it was quite clear to me.' And the other answered, 'Your brain +was refreshed, and that made your judgment clear.' But they never knew +it was I! That was a great delight. The dear souls! they are so +foolish," she cried with the sweetest laughter that ran into tears. "One +cries because one is so happy; it is a silly old habit," she said. + +"And you were not grieved, it did not hurt you--that he did not know--" + +"Oh, not then; not then! I did not go to him for that. When you have +been here a little longer you will see the difference. When you go for +yourself, out of impatience, because it still seems to you that you must +know best, and they don't know you--then it strikes to your heart; but +when you go to help them--ah," she cried, "when he comes how much I +shall have to tell him! 'You thought it was sleep when it was I--when +you woke so fresh and clear it was I that kissed you; you thought it +your duty to me to be sad afterwards and were angry with yourself +because you had wronged me of the first thoughts of your waking--when it +was all me, all through!'" + +"I begin to understand," said the little Pilgrim; "but why should they +not see us, and why should not we tell them? It would seem so natural. +If they saw us it would make them so happy, and so sure." + +Upon this the lady shook her head. + +"The worst of it is not that they are not sure--it is the parting. If +this makes us sorry here, how can they escape the sorrow of it even if +they saw us?--for we must be parted. We cannot go back to live with +them, or why should we have died? And then we must all live our +lives--they in their way, we in ours. We must not weigh them down, but +only help them when it is seen that there is need for it. All this we +shall know better by and by." + +"You make it so clear, and your face is so bright," said our little +Pilgrim gratefully. "You must have known a great deal, and understood +even when you were in the world." + +"I was as foolish as I could be," said the other, with her laugh that +was as sweet as music; "yet thought I knew, and they thought I knew; but +all that does not matter now." + +"I think it matters, for look how much you have shown me; but tell me +one thing more--how was it said to you that you must go and tell him? +Was it some one who spoke--was it--" + +Her face grew so bright that all the past brightness was as a dull sky +to this. It gave out such a light of happiness that the little Pilgrim +was dazzled. + +"I was wandering about," she said, "to see this new place. My mother had +come back between two errands she had, and had come to see me and tell +me everything; and I was straying about wondering what I was to do, when +suddenly I saw some one coming along, as it might be now--" + +She paused and looked up, and the little Pilgrim looked up too with her +heart beating, but there was no one. Then she gave a little sigh, and +turned and listened again. + +"I had not been looking for Him, or thinking. You know my mind is too +light. I am pleased with whatever is before me; and I was so curious, +for my mother had told me many things: when suddenly I caught sight of +Him passing by. He was going on, and when I saw this a panic seized me, +lest He should pass and say nothing. I do not know what I did. I flung +myself upon His robe, and got hold of it, or at least I think so. I was +in such an agony lest He should pass and never notice me. But that was +my folly. He pass! As if that could be!" + +"And what did He say to you?" cried the little Pilgrim, her heart almost +aching it beat so high with sympathy and expectation. + +The lady looked at her for a little without saying anything. + +"I cannot tell you," she said, "any more than I can tell if this is +heaven. It is a mystery. When you see Him you will know. It will be all +you have ever hoped for and more besides, for He understands everything. +He knows what is in our hearts about those we have left, and why He sent +for us before them. There is no need to tell Him anything; He knows. He +will come when it is time; and after you have seen Him you will know +what to do." + +Then the beautiful lady turned her eyes towards the gate, and, while the +little Pilgrim was still gazing, disappeared from her, and went to +comfort some other stranger. They were dear friends always, and met +often, but not again in the same way. + + * * * * * + +When she was thus left alone again, the little Pilgrim sat still upon +the grassy mound, quite tranquil and happy, without wishing to move. +There was such a sense of wellbeing in her that she liked to sit there +and look about her, and breathe the delightful air, like the air of a +summer morning, without wishing for anything. + +"How idle I am!" she said to herself, in the very words she had often +used before she died; but then she was idle from weakness, and now from +happiness. She wanted for nothing. To be alive was so sweet. There was a +great deal to think about in what she had heard, but she did not even +think about that, only resigned herself to the delight of sitting there +in the sweet air and being happy. Many people were coming and going, and +they all knew her, and smiled upon her, and those who were at a distance +would wave their hands. This did not surprise her at all, for though +she was a stranger, she, too, felt that she knew them all; but that they +should be so kind was a delight to her which words could not tell. She +sat and mused very sweetly about all that had been told her, and +wondered whether she, too, might go sometimes, and, with a kiss and a +whisper, clear up something that was dark in the mind of some one who +loved her. "I that never was clever!" she said to herself, with a smile. +And chiefly she thought of a friend whom she loved, who was often in +great perplexity, and did not know how to guide herself amid the +difficulties of the world. + +The little Pilgrim half laughed with delight, and then half cried with +longing to go, as the beautiful lady had done, and make something clear +that had been dark before to this friend. As she was thinking what a +pleasure it would be, some one came up to her, crossing over the flowery +greenness, leaving the path on purpose. This was a being younger than +the lady who had spoken to her before, with flowing hair all crisped +with touches of sunshine, and a dress all white and soft, like the +feathers of a white dove. There was something in her face different from +that of the other, by which the little Pilgrim knew somehow, without +knowing how, that she had come here as a child, and grown up in this +celestial place. She was tall and fair, and came along with so musical a +motion, as if her foot scarcely touched the ground, that she might have +had wings. And the little Pilgrim indeed was not sure as she watched, +whether it might not perhaps be an angel, for she knew that there were +angels among the blessed people who were coming and going about, but had +not been able yet to find one out. She knew that this new-comer was +coming to her, and turned towards her with a smile and a throb at her +heart of expectation. But when the heavenly maiden drew nearer, her +face, though it was so fair, looked to the Pilgrim like another face, +which she had known very well--indeed, like the homely and troubled face +of the friend of whom she had been thinking. And so she smiled all the +more, and held out her hands and said--"I am sure I know you," upon +which the other kissed her, and said, "We all know each other; but I +have seen you often before you came here," and knelt down by her, among +the flowers that were growing, just in front of some tall lilies that +grew over her, and made a lovely canopy over her head. There was +something in her face that was like a child--her mouth so soft as if it +had never spoken anything but heavenly words, her eyes brown and golden +as if they were filled with light. She took the little Pilgrim's hands +in hers, and held them and smoothed them between her own. These hands +had been very thin and worn before, but now, when the Pilgrim looked at +them, she saw that they became softer and whiter every moment with the +touch of this immortal youth. + +"I knew you were coming," said the maiden. "When my mother has wanted +me I have seen you there. And you were thinking of her now--that was how +I found you." + +"Do you know, then, what one thinks?" said the little Pilgrim with +wondering eyes. + +"It is in the air; and when it concerns us it comes to us like the +breeze. But we who are the children here, we feel it more quickly than +you." + +"Are you a child?" said the little Pilgrim, "or are you an angel? +Sometimes you are like a child; but then your face shines and you are +like--you must have some name for it here; there is nothing among the +words I know." And then she paused a little, still looking at her, and +cried, "Oh, if she could but see you, little Margaret! That would do her +most good of all." + +Then the maiden Margaret shook her lovely head. "What does her most good +is the will of the Father," she said. + +At this the little Pilgrim felt once more that thrill of expectation +and awe. "Oh, child, you have seen Him?" she cried. + +And the other smiled. "Have you forgotten who they are that always +behold His face? We have never had any fear or trembling. We are not +angels, and there is no other name; we are the children. There is +something given to us beyond the others. We have had no other home." + +"Oh, tell me, tell me!" the little Pilgrim cried. + +Upon this Margaret kissed her, putting her soft cheek against hers, and +said, "It is a mystery; it cannot be put into words; in your time you +will know." + +"When you touch me you change me, and I grow like you," the Pilgrim +said. "Ah, if she could see us together, you and me! And will you go to +her soon again? And do you see them always--what they are doing? and +take care of them?" + +"It is our Father who takes care of them, and our Lord who is our +Brother. I do His errands when I am able. Sometimes He will let me go, +sometimes another, according as it is best. Who am I that I should take +care of them? I serve them when I may." + +"But you do not forget them?" the Pilgrim said, with wistful eyes. + +"We love them always," said Margaret. She was more still than the lady +who had first spoken with the Pilgrim. Her countenance was full of a +heavenly calm. It had never known passion nor anguish. Sometimes there +was in it a far-seeing look of vision, sometimes the simplicity of a +child. "But what are we in comparison? For He loves them more than we +do. When He keeps us from them it is for love. We must each live our own +life." + +"But it is hard for them sometimes," said the little Pilgrim, who could +not withdraw her thoughts from those she had left. + +"They are never forsaken," said the angel-maiden. + +"But oh! there are worse things than sorrow," the little Pilgrim said; +"there is wrong, there is evil, Margaret. Will not He send you to step +in before them, to save them from wrong?" + +"It is not for us to judge," said the young Margaret, with eyes full of +heavenly wisdom. "Our Brother has it all in His hand. We do not read +their hearts like Him. Sometimes you are permitted to see the battle." + +The little Pilgrim covered her eyes with her hands. "I could not--I +could not! unless I knew they were to win the day." + +"They will win the day in the end. But sometimes, when it was being +lost, I have seen in His face a something--I cannot tell--more love than +before. Something that seemed to say, 'My child, my child, would that I +could do it for thee, my child!'" + +"Oh! that is what I have always felt," cried the Pilgrim, clasping her +hands; her eyes were dim, her heart for a moment almost forgot its +blessedness. "But He could--Oh, little Margaret! He could! You have +forgotten--Lord, if Thou wilt Thou canst--" + +The child of heaven looked at her mutely, with sweet grave eyes, in +which there was much that confused her who was a stranger here; and once +more softly shook her head. + +"Is it that He will not, then?" said the other with a low voice of awe. +"Our Lord who died--He--" + +"Listen," said the other, "I hear His step on the way." + +The little Pilgrim rose up from the mound on which she was sitting. Her +soul was confused with wonder and fear. She had thought that an angel +might step between a soul on earth and sin, and that if one but prayed +and prayed, the dear Lord would stand between and deliver the tempted. +She had meant when she saw His face to ask Him to save Was not He born, +did not He live, and die to save? The angel-maiden looked at her all the +while, with eyes that understood all her perplexity and her doubt, but +spoke not. Thus it was that before the Lord came to her the sweetness of +her first blessedness was obscured, and she found that here, too, even +here, though in a moment she should see Him, there was need for faith. +Young Margaret, who had been kneeling by her, rose up too and stood +among the lilies, waiting, her soft countenance shining, her eyes turned +towards Him who was coming. Upon her there was no cloud nor doubt. She +was one of the children of that land familiar with His presence. And in +the air there was a sound such as those who hear it alone can +describe--a sound as of help coming and safety, like the sound of a +deliverer when one is in deadly danger, like the sound of a conqueror, +like the step of the dearest-beloved coming home. As it came nearer the +fear melted away out of the beating heart of the Pilgrim. Who could fear +so near Him? her breath went away from her, her heart out of her bosom, +to meet His coming. Oh, never fear could live where He was! Her soul was +all confused, but it was with hope and joy. She held out her hands in +that amaze, and dropped upon her knees, not knowing what she did. + +He was going about His Father's business, not lingering, yet neither +making haste; and the calm and peace which the little Pilgrim had seen +in the faces of the blessed were but reflections from the majestic +gentleness of the countenance to which, all quivering with happiness and +wonder, she lifted up her eyes. Many things there had been in her mind +to say to Him. She wanted to ask for those she loved some things which +perhaps He had overlooked. She wanted to say, "Send me." It seemed to +her that here was the occasion she had longed for all her life. Oh, how +many times had she wished to be able to go to Him, to fall at His feet, +to show Him something which had been left undone, something which +perhaps for her asking He would remember to do. But when this dream of +her life was fulfilled, and the little Pilgrim kneeling, and all shaken +and trembling with devotion and joy, was at His feet, lifting her face +to Him, seeing Him, hearing Him--then she said nothing to Him at all. +She no longer wanted to say anything, or wanted anything except what He +chose, or had power to think of anything except that all was well, and +everything--everything, as it should be in His hand. It seemed to her +that all that she had ever hoped for was fulfilled when she met the look +in His eyes. At first it seemed too bright for her to meet, but next +moment she knew it was all that was needed to light up the world, and in +it everything was clear. Her trembling ceased, her little frame grew +inspired; though she still knelt, her head rose erect, drawn to Him like +the flower to the sun. She could not tell how long it was, nor what was +said, nor if it was in words. All that she knew was that she told Him +all that ever she had thought, or wished, or intended in all her life, +although she said nothing at all; and that He opened all things to her, +and showed her that everything was well, and no one forgotten; and that +the things she would have told Him of were more near His heart than +hers, and those to whom she wanted to be sent were in His own hand. But +whether this passed with words or without words she could not tell. Her +soul expanded under His eyes like a flower. It opened out, it +comprehended, and felt, and knew. She smote her hands together in her +wonder that she could have missed seeing what was so clear, and laughed +with a sweet scorn at her folly, as two people who love each other laugh +at the little misunderstanding that has parted them. She was bold with +Him, though she was so timid by nature, and ventured to laugh at +herself, not to reproach herself--for His divine eyes spoke no blame, +but smiled upon her folly too. And then He laid a hand upon her head, +which seemed to fill her with currents of strength and joy running +through all her veins. And then she seemed to come to herself saying +loud out, "And that I will! and that I will!" and lo, she was kneeling +on the warm soft sod alone, and hearing the sound of His footsteps as He +went about His Father's business, filling all the air with echoes of +blessing. And all the people who were coming and going smiled upon her, +and she knew they were all glad for her that she had seen Him, and got +the desire of her heart. Some of them waved their hands as they passed, +and some paused a moment and spoke to her with tender congratulations. +They seemed to have the tears in their eyes for joy, remembering every +one the first time they had themselves seen Him, and the joy of it; so +that all about there sounded a concord of happy thoughts all echoing to +each other, "She has seen the Lord!" + +Why did she say, "And that I will! and that I will!" with such fervour +and delight? She could not have told but yet she knew. The first thing +was that she had yet to wait and believe until all things should be +accomplished, neither doubting nor fearing, but knowing that all should +be well; and the second was that she must delay no longer, but rise up +and serve the Father according to what was given her as her reward. When +she had recovered a little of her rapture she rose from her knees, and +stood still for a moment to be sure which way she was to go. And she was +not aware what guided her, but yet turned her face in the appointed way +without any doubt. For doubt was now gone away for ever, and that fear +that once gave her so much trouble lest she might not be doing what was +best. As she moved along she wondered at herself more and more. She felt +no longer, as at first, like the child she remembered to have been, +venturing out in the awful lovely stillness of the morning before any +one was awake; but she felt that to move along was a delight, and that +her foot scarcely touched the grass, and her whole being was instinct +with such lightness of strength and life that it did not matter to her +how far she went, nor what she carried, nor if the way was easy or hard. +The way she chose was one of those which led to the great gate, and many +met her coming from thence, with looks that were somewhat bewildered, as +if they did not yet know whither they were going or what had happened to +them. Upon whom she smiled as she passed them with soft looks of +tenderness and sympathy, knowing what they were feeling, but did not +stop to explain to them, because she had something else that had been +given her to do. For this is what always follows in that country when +you meet the Lord, that you instantly know what it is that He would have +you do. + +The little Pilgrim thus went on and on towards the gate, which she had +not seen when she herself came through it, having been lifted in His +arms by the great Death Angel, and set down softly inside, so that she +did not know it, or even the shadow of it. As she drew nearer the light +became less bright, though very sweet, like a lovely dawn, and she +wondered to herself to think that she had been here but a moment ago, +and yet so much had passed since then. And still she was not aware what +was her errand, but wondered if she was to go back by these same gates, +and perhaps return where she had been. She went up to them very closely, +for she was curious to see the place through which she had come in her +sleep, as a traveller goes back to see the city gate, with its bridge +and portcullis, through which he has passed by night. The gate was very +great, of a wonderful, curious architecture, and strange, delicate +arches and canopies above. Some parts of them seemed cut very clean and +clear; but the outlines were all softened with a sort of mist and +shadow, so that it looked greater and higher than it was. The lower part +was not one great doorway as the Pilgrim had supposed, but innumerable +doors, all separate, and very narrow, so that but one could pass at a +time, though the arch enclosed all, and seemed filled with great folding +gates in which the smaller doors were set, so that if need arose a vast +opening might be made for many to enter. Of the little doors many were +shut as the Pilgrim approached; but from moment to moment, one after +another would be pushed softly open from without, and some one would +come in. The little Pilgrim looked at it all with great interest, +wondering which of the doors she had herself come by; but while she +stood absorbed by this, a door was suddenly pushed open close by her, +and some one flung forward into the blessed country, falling upon the +ground, and stretched out wild arms as though to clutch the very soil. +This sight gave the Pilgrim a great surprise, for it was the first time +she had heard any sound of pain, or seen any sight of trouble, since she +entered here. In that moment she knew what it was that the dear Lord had +given her to do. She had no need to pause to think, for her heart told +her; and she did not hesitate as she might have done in the other life, +not knowing what to say. She went forward, and gathered this poor +creature into her arms, as if it had been a child, and drew her quite +within the land of peace--for she had fallen across the threshold, so as +to hinder any one entering who might be coming after her. It was a +woman, and she had flung herself upon her face, so that it was difficult +for the little Pilgrim to see what manner of person it was, for though +she felt herself strong enough to take up this new-comer in her arms and +carry her away, yet she forbore, seeing the will of the stranger was not +so. For some time the woman lay moaning, with now and then a great sob +shaking her as she lay. The little Pilgrim had taken her by both her +arms, and drawn her head to rest upon her own lap, and was still holding +the hands, which the poor creature had thrown out as if to clutch the +ground. Thus she lay for a little while, as the little Pilgrim +remembered she herself had lain, not wishing to move, wondering what had +happened to her; and then she clutched the hands which grasped her, and +said, muttering-- + +"You are some one new. Have you come to save me? Oh, save me! Oh, save +me! Don't let me die!" + +This was very strange to the little Pilgrim, and went to her heart. She +soothed the stranger, holding her hands warm and light, and stooping +over her. + +"Dear," she said, "you must try and not be afraid." + +"You say so," said the woman, "because you are well and strong. You +don't know what it is to be seized in the middle of your life, and told +that you've got to die. Oh, I have been a sinful creature! I am not fit +to die. Can't you give me something that will cure me? What is the good +of doctors and nurses if they cannot save a poor soul that is not fit to +die?" + +At this the little Pilgrim smiled upon her, always holding her fast, and +said-- + +"Why are you so afraid to die?" + +The woman raised her head to look who it was who put such a strange +question to her. + +"You are some one new," she said. "I have never seen you before. Is +there anyone that is not afraid to die? Would _you_ like to have to give +your account all in a moment, without any time to prepare?" + +"But you have had time to prepare," said the Pilgrim. + +"Oh, only a very very little time; and I never thought it was true. I am +not an old woman, and I am not fit to die; and I'm poor. Oh, if I were +rich, I would bribe you to give me something to keep me alive. Won't you +do it for pity?--won't you do it for pity? When you are as bad as I am, +oh, you will perhaps call for some one to help you, and find nobody, +like me." + +"I will help you for love," said the little Pilgrim. "Some one who loves +you has sent me." + +The woman lifted herself up a little and shook her head. "There is +nobody that loves me." Then she cast her eyes round her and began to +tremble again (for the touch of the little Pilgrim had stilled her). +"Oh, where am I?" she said. "They have taken me away; they have brought +me to a strange place; and you are new. Oh, where have they taken +me?--where am I?--where am I?" she cried. "Have they brought me here to +die?" + +Then the little Pilgrim bent over her and soothed her. "You must not be +so much afraid of dying; that is all over. You need not fear that any +more," she said, softly; "for here where you now are we have all died." + +The woman started up out of her arms, and then she gave a great shriek +that made the air ring, and cried out, "Dead! am I dead?" with a shudder +and convulsion, throwing herself again wildly with outstretched hands +upon the ground. + +This was a great and terrible work for the little Pilgrim--the first she +had ever had to do--and her heart failed her for a moment; but +afterwards she remembered our Brother who sent her, and knew what was +best. She drew closer to the new-comer and took her hand again. + +"Try," she said, in a soft voice, "and think a little. Do you feel now +so ill as you were? Do not be frightened, but think a little. I will +hold your hand; and look at me; you are not afraid of me." + +The poor creature shuddered again, and then she turned her face and +looked doubtfully with great dark eyes dilated, and the brow and cheek +so curved and puckered round them that they seemed to glow out of deep +caverns. Her face was full of anguish and fear. But as she looked at +the little Pilgrim her troubled gaze softened. Of her own accord she +clasped her other hand upon the one that held hers, and then she said +with a gasp-- + +"I am not afraid of you; that was not true that you said? You are one of +the sisters, and you want to frighten me and make me repent?" + +"You do repent," the Pilgrim said. + +"Oh," cried the poor woman, "what has the like of you to do with me? Now +I look at you I never saw any one that was like you before. Don't you +hate me?--don't you loathe me? I do myself. It's so ugly to go wrong. I +think now I would almost rather die and be done with it. You will say +that is because I am going to get better. I feel a great deal better +now. Do you think I am going to get over it? Oh, I am better! I could +get up out of bed and walk about. Yes, but I am not in bed; where have +you brought me? Never mind, it is a fine air; I shall soon get well +here." + +The Pilgrim was silent for a little, holding her hands. And then she +said-- + +"Tell me how you feel now," in her soft voice. + +The woman had sat up and was gazing round her. "It is very strange," she +said; "it is all confused. I think upon my mother and the old prayers I +used to say. For a long, long time I always said my prayers; but now +I've got hardened, they say. Oh, I was once as fresh as any one. It all +comes over me now. I feel as if I were young again--just come out of the +country. I am sure that I could walk." + +The little Pilgrim raised her up, holding her by her hands; and she +stood and gazed round about her, making one or two doubtful steps. She +was very pale, and the light was dim; her eyes peered into it with a +scared yet eager look. She made another step, then stopped again. + +"I am quite well," she said. "I could walk a mile. I could walk any +distance. What was that you said? Oh, I tell you I am better! I am not +going to die." + +"You will never, never die," said the little Pilgrim; "are you not glad +it is all over? Oh, I was so glad! And all the more you should be glad +if you were so much afraid." + +But this woman was not glad. She shrank away from her companion, then +came close to her again, and gripped her with her hands. + +"It is your fun," she said, "or just to frighten me; perhaps you think +it will do me no harm as I am getting so well--you want to frighten me +to make me good. But I mean to be good without that--I do! I do! When +one is so near dying as I have been and yet gets better--for I am going +to get better? Yes! you know it as well as I." + +The little Pilgrim made no reply, but stood by looking at her charge, +not feeling that anything was given her to say; and she was so new to +this work that there was a little trembling in her lest she should not +do everything as she ought. And the woman looked round with those +anxious eyes gazing all about. The light did not brighten as it had done +when the Pilgrim herself first came to this place. For one thing they +had remained quite close to the gate, which no doubt threw a shadow. The +woman looked at that, and then turned and looked into the dim morning, +and did not know where she was, and her heart was confused and troubled. + +"Where are we?" she said. "I do not know where it is; they must have +brought me here in my sleep--where are we? How strange to bring a sick +woman away out of her room in her sleep! I suppose it was the new +doctor," she went on, looking very closely in the little Pilgrim's face, +then paused, and, drawing a long breath, said softly, "It has done me +good. It is better air--it is a new kind of cure." + +But though she spoke like this, she did not convince herself; her eyes +were wild with wondering and fear. She gripped the Pilgrim's arm more +and more closely, and trembled, leaning upon her. + +"Why don't you speak to me?" she said; "why don't you tell me? Oh, I +don't know how to live in this place! What do you do?--how do you speak? +I am not fit for it. And what are you? I never saw you before nor any +one like you. What do you want with me? Why are you so kind to me? +Why--why--?" + +And here she went off into a murmur of questions. Why? why? always +holding fast by the little Pilgrim, always gazing round her, groping as +it were in the dimness with her great eyes. + +"I have come because our dear Lord, who is our Brother, sent me to meet +you, and because I love you," the little Pilgrim said. + +"Love me!" the woman cried, throwing up her hands, "but no one loves me. +I have not deserved it." Here she grasped her close again with a sudden +clutch, and cried out, "If this is what you say, where is God?" + +"Are you afraid of Him?" the little Pilgrim said. + +Upon which the woman trembled so that the Pilgrim trembled too with the +quivering of her frame; then loosed her hold and fell upon her face, and +cried-- + +"Hide me! Hide me! I have been a great sinner. Hide me that He may not +see me," and with one hand tried to draw the Pilgrim's dress as a veil +between her and something she feared. + +"How should I hide you from Him who is everywhere? and why should I hide +you from your Father?" the little Pilgrim said. This she said almost +with indignation, wondering that any one could put more trust in her, +who was no better than a child, than in the Father of all. But then she +said, "Look in your heart and you will see you are not so much afraid as +you think. This is how you have been accustomed to frighten yourself. +But look now into your heart. You thought you were very ill at first, +but not now; and you think you are afraid, but look in your heart--" + +There was a silence, and then the woman raised her head with a wonderful +look, in which there was amazement and doubt, as if she had heard some +joyful thing but dared not yet believe that it was true. Once more she +hid her face in her hands, and once more raised it again. Her eyes +softened; a long sigh or gasp, like one taking breath after drowning, +shook her breast. Then she said, "I think that is true. But if I am not +afraid it is because I am--bad. It is because I am hardened. Oh, should +not I fear Him who can send me away into--the lake that burns--into the +pit--" And here she gave a great cry, but held the little Pilgrim all +the while with her eyes, which seem to plead and ask for better news. + +Then there came into the Pilgrim's heart what to say, and she took the +woman's hand again and held it between her own. "That is the change," +she said, "that comes when we come here. We are not afraid any more of +our Father. We are not all happy. Perhaps you will not be happy at +first. But if he says to you go--even to that place you speak of--you +will know that it is well, and you will not be afraid. You are not +afraid now--oh, I can see it in your eyes. You are not happy, but you +are not afraid. You know it is the Father. Do not say God, that is far +off--Father!" said the little Pilgrim, holding up the woman's hand +clasped in her own. And there came into her soul an ecstasy, and tears +that were tears of blessedness fell from her eyes, and all about her +there seemed to shine a light. When she came to herself, the woman who +was her charge had come quite close to her, and had added her other hand +to that the Pilgrim held, and was weeping, and saying, "I am not +afraid," with now and then a gasp and sob, like a child who, after a +passion of tears, has been consoled, yet goes on sobbing and cannot +quite forget, and is afraid to own that all is well again. Then the +Pilgrim kissed her, and bade her rest a little, for even she herself +felt shaken, and longed for a little quiet and to feel the true sense of +the peace that was in her heart. She sat down beside her upon the +ground, and made her lean her head against her shoulder, and thus they +remained very still for a little time, saying no more. It seemed to the +little Pilgrim that her companion had fallen asleep, and perhaps it was +so, after so much agitation. All this time there had been people +passing, entering by the many doors. And most of them paused a little to +see where they were, and looked round them, then went on; and it seemed +to the little Pilgrim that, according to the doors by which they +entered, each took a different way. While she watched, another came in +by the same door as that at which the woman who was her charge had come +in. And he too stumbled and looked about him with an air of great +wonder and doubt. When he saw her seated on the ground, he came up to +her, hesitating as one in a strange place who does not want to betray +that he is bewildered and has lost his way. He came with a little +pretence of smiling, though his countenance was pale and scared, and +said, drawing his breath quick, "I ought to know where I am, but I have +lost my head, I think. Will you tell me which is the way?" + +"What way?" cried the little Pilgrim, for her strength was gone from +her, and she had no word to say to him. He looked at her with that +bewilderment on his face, and said, "I find myself strange, strange. I +ought to know where I am; but it is scarcely daylight yet. It is perhaps +foolish to come out so early in the morning." This he said in his +confusion, not knowing where he was, nor what he said. + +"I think all the ways lead to our Father," said the little Pilgrim +(though she had not known this till now). "And the dear Lord walks +about them all. Here you never go astray." + +Upon this the stranger looked at her, and asked in a faltering voice, +"Are you an angel?" still not knowing what he said. + +"Oh, no, no. I am only a Pilgrim," she replied. + +"May I sit by you a little?" said the man. He sat down drawing long +breaths as though he had gone through great fatigue; and looked about +with wondering eyes. "You will wonder, but I do not know where I am," he +said. "I feel as if I must be dreaming. This is not where I expected to +come. I looked for something very different; do you think there can have +been any mistake?" + +"Oh, never that," she said; "there are no mistakes here." + +Then he looked at her again, and said-- + +"I perceive that you belong to this country, though you say you are a +pilgrim. I should be grateful if you would tell me Does one live here? +And is this all? Is there no--no--? but I don't know what word to use. +All is so strange, different from what I expected." + +"Do you know that you have died?" + +"Yes, yes, I am quite acquainted with that," he said, hurriedly, as if +it had been an idea he disliked to dwell upon. "But then I expected--Is +there no one to tell you where to go, or what you are to be--? or to +take any notice of you?" + +The little Pilgrim was startled by this tone. She did not understand its +meaning, and she had not any word to say to him. She looked at him with +as much bewilderment as he had shown when he approached her, and +replied, faltering-- + +"There are a great many people here; but I have never heard if there is +any one to tell you--" + +"What does it matter how many people there are if you know none of +them?" he said. + +"We all know each other," she answered him; but then paused and +hesitated a little, because this was what had been said to her, and of +herself she was not assured of it, neither did she know at all how to +deal with this stranger, to whom she had not any commission. It seemed +that he had no one to care for him, and the little Pilgrim had a sense +of compassion, yet of trouble, in her heart--for what could she say? And +it was very strange to her to see one who was not content here. + +"Ah, but there should be some one to point out the way, and tell us +which is our circle, and where we ought to go," he said. And then he too +was silent for a while, looking about him, as all were fain to do on +their first arrival, finding everything so strange. There were people +coming in at every moment, and some were met at the very threshold, and +some went away alone, with peaceful faces; and there were many groups +about, talking together in soft voices, but no one interrupted the +other; and though so many were there, each voice was as clear as if it +had spoken alone, and there was no tumult of sound as when many people +assemble together in the lower world. + +The little Pilgrim wondered to find herself with the woman resting upon +her on one side, and the man seated silent on the other, neither having, +it appeared, any guide but only herself who knew so little. How was she +to lead them in the paths which she did not know?--and she was exhausted +by the agitation of her struggle with the woman whom she felt to be her +charge. But in this moment of silence she had time to remember the face +of the Lord, when He gave her this commission, and her heart was +strengthened. The man all this time sat and watched, looking eagerly all +about him, examining the faces of those who went and came: and sometimes +he made a little start as if to go and speak to some one he knew; but +always drew back again and looked at the little Pilgrim, as if he had +said, "This is the one who will serve me best." He spoke to her again +after a while and said, "I suppose you are one of the guides that show +the way." + +"No," said the little Pilgrim, anxiously, "I know so little! It is not +long since I came here. I came in the early morning--" + +"Why, it is morning now. You could not come earlier than it is now. You +mean yesterday." + +"I think," said the Pilgrim, "that yesterday is the other side; there is +no yesterday here." + +He looked at her with the keen look he had, to understand her the +better; and then he said-- + +"No division of time! I think that must be monotonous. It will be +strange to have no night; but I suppose one gets used to everything. I +hope though there is something to do. I have always lived a very busy +life. Perhaps this is just a little pause before we go--to be--to +have--to get our--appointed place." + +He had an uneasy look as he said this, and looked at her with an anxious +curiosity, which the little Pilgrim did not understand. + +"I do not know," she said softly, shaking her head. "I have so little +experience. I have not been told of an appointed place." + +The man looked at her very strangely. + +"I did not think," he said, "that I should have found such ignorance +here. Is it not well known that we must all appear before the judgment +seat of God?" + +These words seemed to cause a trembling in the still air, and the woman +on the other side raised herself suddenly up, clasping her hands: and +some of those who had just entered heard the words, and came and crowded +about the little Pilgrim, some standing, some falling down upon their +knees, all with their faces turned towards her. She who had always been +so simple and small, so little used to teach; she was frightened with +the sight of all these strangers crowding, hanging upon her lips, +looking to her for knowledge. She knew not what to do or what to say. +The tears came into her eyes. + +"Oh," she said, "I do not know anything about a judgment seat. I know +that our Father is here, and that when we are in trouble we are taken to +Him to be comforted, and that our dear Lord our Brother is among us +every day, and every one may see Him. Listen," she said, standing up +suddenly among them, feeling strong as an angel. "I have seen Him; +though I am nothing, so little as you see, and often silly, never clever +as some of you are, I have seen Him! and so will all of you. There is no +more that I know of," she said softly, clasping her hands. "When you see +Him it comes into your heart what you must do." + +And then there was a murmur of voices about her, some saying that was +best, and some wondering if that were all, and some crying if He would +but come now--while the little Pilgrim stood among them with her face +shining, and they all looked at her, asking her to tell them more, to +show them how to find Him. But this was far above what she could do, for +she too was not much more than a stranger, and had little strength. She +would not go back a step, nor desert those who were so anxious to know, +though her heart fluttered almost as it had used to do before she died, +what with her longing to tell them, and knowing that she had no more to +say. + +But in that land it is never permitted that one who stands bravely and +fails not shall be left without succour; for it is no longer needful +there to stand even to death, since all dying is over, and all souls are +tested. When it was seen that the little Pilgrim was thus surrounded by +so many that questioned her, there suddenly came about her many others +from the brightness out of which she had come, who, one going to one +hand, and one to another, safely led them into the ways in which their +course lay: so that the Pilgrim was free to lead forth the woman who +had been given her in charge, and whose path lay in a dim, but pleasant +country, outside of that light and gladness in which the Pilgrim's home +was. + +"But," she said, "you are not to fear or be cast down, because He goes +likewise by these ways, and there is not a corner in all this land but +He is to be seen passing by; and He will come and speak to you, and lay +His hand upon you; and afterwards everything will be clear, and you will +know what you are to do." + +"Stay with me till He comes--oh, stay with me," the woman cried, +clinging to her arm. + +"Unless another is sent," the little Pilgrim said. And it was nothing to +her that the air was less bright there, for her mind was full of light, +so that, though her heart still fluttered a little with all that had +passed, she had no longing to return, nor to shorten the way, but went +by the lower road sweetly, with the stranger hanging upon her, who was +stronger and taller than she. Thus they went on, and the Pilgrim told +her all she knew, and everything that came into her heart. And so full +was she of the great things she had to say, that it was a surprise to +her, and left her trembling, when suddenly the woman took away her +clinging hand, and flew forward with arms outspread and a cry of joy. +The little Pilgrim stood still to see, and on the path before them was a +child, coming towards them singing, with a look such as is never seen +but upon the faces of children who have come here early, and who behold +the face of the Father, and have never known fear nor sorrow. The woman +flew and fell at the child's feet, and he put his hand upon her, and +raised her up, and called her "mother." Then he smiled upon the little +Pilgrim, and led her away. + +"Now she needs me no longer," said the Pilgrim; and it was a surprise to +her, and for a moment she wondered in herself if it was known that this +child should come so suddenly and her work be over; and also how she was +to return again to the sweet place among the flowers from which she had +come. But when she turned to look if there was any way, she found One +standing by such as she had not yet seen. This was a youth, with a face +just touched with manhood, as at the moment when the boy ends, when all +is still fresh and pure in the heart; but he was taller and greater than +a man. + +"I am sent," he said, "little sister, to take you to the Father: because +you have been very faithful, and gone beyond your strength." + +And he took the little Pilgrim by the hand, and she knew he was an +angel; and immediately the sweet air melted about them into light, and a +hush came upon her of all thought and all sense, attending till she +should receive the blessing, and her new name, and see what is beyond +telling, and hear and understand:-- + + + + +THE LITTLE PILGRIM GOES UP HIGHER. + + +When the little Pilgrim came out of the presence of the Father, she +found herself in the street of a great city. But what she saw and heard +when she was with Him it is not given to the tongue of mortal to say, +for it is beyond words, and beyond even thought. As the mystery of love +is not to be spoken but to be felt, even in the lower earth, so, but +much less, is that great mystery of the love of the Father to be +expressed in words. The little Pilgrim was very happy when she went into +that sacred place, but there was a great awe upon her, and it might even +be said that she was afraid; but when she came out again she feared +nothing, but looked with clear eyes upon all she saw, loving them, but +no more overawed by them, having seen that which is above all. When she +came forth again to her common life--for it is not permitted save for +those who have attained the greatest heights to dwell there--she had no +longer need of any guide, but came alone, knowing where to go, and +walking where it pleased her, with reverence and a great delight in +seeing and knowing all that was around, but no fear. It was a great +city, but it was not like the great cities which she had seen. She +understood as she passed along how it was that those who had been +dazzled but by a passing glance had described the walls and the pavement +as gold. They were like what gold is, beautiful and clear, of a lovely +colour, but softer in tone than metal ever was, and as cool and fresh to +walk upon and to touch as if they had been velvet grass. The buildings +were all beautiful, of every style and form that it is possible to think +of, yet in great harmony, as if every man had followed his own taste, +yet all had been so combined and grouped by the master architect, that +each individual feature enhanced the effect of the rest. Some of the +houses were greater and some smaller, but all of them were rich in +carvings and pictures and lovely decorations, and the effect was as if +the richest materials had been employed, marbles and beautiful +sculptured stone, and wood of beautiful tints, though the little Pilgrim +knew that these were not like the marble and stone she had once known, +but heavenly representatives of them, far better than they. There were +people at work upon them, building new houses and making additions, and +a great many painters painting upon them the history of the people who +lived there, or of others who were worthy that commemoration. And the +streets were full of pleasant sound, and of crowds going and coming, and +the commotion of much business, and many things to do. And this +movement, and the brightness of the air, and the wonderful things that +were to be seen on every side, made the Pilgrim gay, so that she could +have sung with pleasure as she went along. And all who met her smiled, +and every group exchanged greetings as they passed along, all knowing +each other. Many of them, as might be seen, had come there, as she did, +to see the wonders of the beautiful city; and all who lived there were +ready to tell them whatever they desired to know, and show them the +finest houses and the greatest pictures. And this gave a feeling of +holiday and pleasure which was delightful beyond description, for all +the busy people about were full of sympathy with the strangers--bidding +them welcome, inviting them into their houses, making the warmest +fellowship. And friends were meeting continually on every side; but the +Pilgrim had no sense that she was forlorn in being alone, for all were +friends; and it pleased her to watch the others, and see how one turned +this way and one another, every one finding something that delighted +him above all other things. She herself took a great pleasure in +watching a painter, who was standing upon a balcony a little way above +her, painting upon a great fresco: and when he saw this he asked her to +come up beside him and see his work. She asked him a great many +questions about it, and why it was that he was working only at the +draperies of the figures, and did not touch their faces, some of which +were already finished and seemed to be looking at her, as living as she +was, out of the wall, while some were merely outlined as yet. He told +her that he was not a great painter to do this, or to design the great +work, but that the master would come presently, who had the chief +responsibility. "For we have not all the same genius," he said, "and if +I were to paint this head it would not have the gift of life as that one +has; but to stand by and see him put it in, you cannot think what a +happiness that is: for one knows every touch, and just what effect it +will have, though one could not do it one's self; and it is a wonder and +a delight perpetual that it should be done." + +The little Pilgrim looked up at him and said, "That is very beautiful to +say. And do you never wish to be like him--to make the lovely, living +faces as well as the other parts?" + +"Is not this lovely too?" he said; and showed her how he had just put in +a billowy robe, buoyed out with the wind, and sweeping down from the +shoulders of a stately figure in such free and graceful folds that she +would have liked to take it in her hand and feel the silken texture; and +then he told her how absorbing it was to study the mysteries of colour +and the differences of light. "There is enough in that to make one +happy," he said. "It is thought by some that we will all come to the +higher point with work and thought; but that is not my feeling; and +whether it is so or not what does it matter, for our Father makes no +difference: and all of us are necessary to everything that is done: and +it is almost more delight to see the master do it than to do it with +one's own hand. For one thing, your own work may rejoice you in your +heart, but always with a little trembling, because it is never so +perfect as you would have it--whereas in your master's work you have +full content, because his idea goes beyond yours, and as he makes every +touch you can feel 'that is right--that is complete--that is just as it +ought to be.' Do you understand what I mean?" he said, turning to her +with a smile. + +"I understand it perfectly," she cried, clasping her hands together with +the delight of accord. "Don't you think that is one of the things that +are so happy here? you understand at half a word." + +"Not everybody," he said, and smiled upon her like a brother; "for we +are not all alike even here." + +"Were you a painter?" she said, "in--in the other--?" + +"In the old times. I was one of those that strove for the mastery, and +sometimes grudged--We remember these things at times," he said gravely, +"to make us more aware of the blessedness of being content." + +"It is long since then?" she said with some wistfulness; upon which he +smiled again. + +"So long," he said, "that we have worn out most of our links to the +world below. We have all come away, and those who were after us for +generations. But you are a new-comer." + +"And are they all with you? are you all together? do you live as in the +old time?" + +Upon this the painter smiled, but not so brightly as before. + +"Not as in the old time," he said, "nor are they all here. Some are +still upon the way, and of some we have no certainty, only news from +time to time. The angels are very good to us. They never miss an +occasion to bring us news; for they go everywhere, you know." + +"Yes," said the little Pilgrim, though indeed she had not known it till +now; but it seemed to her as if it had come to her mind by nature and +she had never needed to be told. + +"They are so tender-hearted," the painter said; "and more than that, +they are very curious about men and women. They have known it all from +the beginning, and it is a wonder to them. There is a friend of mine, an +angel, who is more wise in men's hearts than any one I know; and yet he +will say to me sometimes, 'I do not understand you--you are wonderful.' +They like to find out all we are thinking. It is an endless pleasure to +them, just as it is to some of us to watch the people in the other +worlds." + +"Do you mean--where we have come from?" said the little Pilgrim. + +"Not always there. We in this city have been long separated from that +country, for all that we love are out of it." + +"But not here?" the little Pilgrim cried again with a little sorrow--a +pang that she had thought could never touch her again--in her heart. + +"But coming! coming!" said the painter, cheerfully; "and some were here +before us, and some have arrived since. They are everywhere." + +"But some in trouble--some in trouble!" she cried, with the tears in her +eyes. + +"We suppose so," he said gravely; "for some are in that place which once +was called among us the place of despair." + +"You mean--" and though the little Pilgrim had been made free of fear, +at that word which she would not speak, she trembled, and the light grew +dim in her eyes. + +"Well!" said her new friend, "and what then? The Father sees through and +through it as He does here: they cannot escape Him: so that there is +Love near them always. I have a son," he said, then sighed a little, but +smiled again, "who is there." + +The little Pilgrim at this clasped her hands with a piteous cry. + +"Nay, nay," he said, "little sister; my friend I was telling you of, the +angel, brought me news of him just now. Indeed there was news of him +through all the city. Did you not hear all the bells ringing? But +perhaps that was before you came. The angels who know me best came one +after another to tell me, and our Lord himself came to wish me joy. My +son had found the way." + +The little Pilgrim did not understand this, and almost thought that the +painter must be mistaken or dreaming. She looked at him very anxiously +and said-- + +"I thought that those unhappy--never came out any more." + +The painter smiled at her in return, and said-- + +"Had you children in the old time?" + +She paused a little before she replied. + +"I had children in love," she said, "but none that were born mine." + +"It is the same," he said; "it is the same; and if one of them had +sinned against you, injured you, done wrong in any way, would you have +cast him off, or what would you have done?" + +"Oh!" said the little Pilgrim again, with a vivid light of memory coming +into her face, which showed she had no need to think of this as a thing +that might have happened, but knew. "I brought him home. I nursed him +well again. I prayed for him night and day. Did you say cast him off? +when he had most need of me? then I never could have loved him," she +cried. + +The painter nodded his head, and his hand with the pencil in it, for he +had turned from his picture to look at her. + +"Then you think you love better than our Father?" he said: and turned to +his work, and painted a new fold in the robe, which looked as if a soft +air had suddenly blown into it, and not the touch of a skilful hand. + +This made the Pilgrim tremble, as though in her ignorance she had done +something wrong. After that there came a great joy into her heart. "Oh, +how happy you have made me!" she cried. "I am glad with all my heart for +you and your son--" Then she paused a little and added, "But you said he +was still there." + +"It is true: for the land of darkness is very confusing, they tell me, +for want of the true light, and our dear friends the angels are not +permitted to help: but if one follows them, that shows the way. You may +be in that land yet on your way hither. It was very hard to understand +at first," said the painter; "there are some sketches I could show you. +No one has ever made a picture of it, though many have tried; but I +could show you some sketches--if you wish to see." + +To this the little Pilgrim's look was so plain an answer that the +painter laid down his pallet and his brush, and left his work, to show +them to her as he had promised. They went down from the balcony and +along the street until they came to one of the great palaces, where +many were coming and going. Here they walked through some vast halls, +where students were working at easels, doing every kind of beautiful +work: some painting pictures, some preparing drawings, planning houses +and palaces. The Pilgrim would have liked to pause at every moment to +see one lovely thing or another, but the painter walked on steadily till +he came to a room which was full of sketches, some of them like pictures +in little, with many figures--some of them only a representation of a +flower, or the wing of a bird. "These are all the master's," he said; +"sometimes the sight of them will be enough to put something great into +the mind of another. In this corner are the sketches I told you of." +There' were two of them hanging together upon the wall, and at first it +seemed to the little Pilgrim as if they represented the flames and fire +of which she had read, and this made her shudder for the moment. But +then she saw that it was a red light like a stormy sunset, with masses +of clouds in the sky, and a low sun very fiery and dazzling, which no +doubt to a hasty glance must have looked, with its dark shadows and high +lurid lights, like the fires of the bottomless pit. But when you looked +down you saw the reality what it was. The country that lay beneath was +full of tropical foliage, but with many stretches of sand and dry +plains, and in the foreground was a town, that looked very prosperous +and crowded, though the figures were very minute, the subject being so +great; but no one to see it would have taken it for anything but a busy +and wealthy place, in a thunderous atmosphere, with a storm coming on. +In the next there was a section of a street with a great banqueting hall +open to the view, and many people sitting about the table. You could see +that there was a great deal of laughter and conversation going on, some +very noisy groups, but others that sat more quietly in corners and +conversed, and some who sang, and every kind of entertainment. The +little Pilgrim was very much astonished to see this, and turned to the +painter, who answered her directly, though she had not spoken. "We used +to think differently once. There are some who are there and do not know +it. They think only it is the old life over again, but always worse, and +they are led on in the ways of evil: but they do not feel the punishment +until they begin to find out where they are and to struggle, and wish +for other things." + +The little Pilgrim felt her heart beat very wildly while she looked at +this, and she thought upon the rich man in the parable, who, though he +was himself in torment, prayed that his brother might be saved, and she +said to herself, "Our dear Lord would never leave him there who could +think of his brother when he was himself in such a strait." And when she +looked at the painter he smiled upon her, and nodded his head. Then he +led her to the other corner of the room where there were other +pictures. One of them was of a party seated round a table and an angel +looking on. The angel had the aspect of a traveller, as if he were +passing quickly by, and had but paused a moment to look, when one of the +men glancing up suddenly saw him. The picture was dim, but the startled +look upon this man's face, and the sorrow on the angel's, appeared out +of the misty background with such truth that the tears came into the +little Pilgrim's eyes, and she said in her heart, "Oh, that I could go +to him and help him!" The other sketches were dimmer and dimmer. You +seemed to see out of the darkness gleaming lights, and companies of +revellers, out of which here and there was one trying to escape. And +then the wide plains in the night, and the white vision of the angel in +the distance, and here and there by different paths a fugitive striving +to follow. "Oh, sir," said the little Pilgrim, "how did you learn to do +it? You have never been there." + +"It was the master, not I; and I cannot tell you if he has ever been +there. When the Father has given you that gift, you can go to many +places, without leaving the one where you are. And then he has heard +what the angels say." + +"And will they all get safe at the last? and even that great spirit, he +that fell from Heaven--" + +The painter shook his head, and said, "It is not permitted to you and me +to know such great things. Perhaps the wise will tell you if you ask +them: but for me I ask the Father in my heart and listen to what He +says." + +"That is best!" the little Pilgrim said; and she asked the Father in her +heart: and there came all over her such a glow of warmth and happiness +that her soul was satisfied. She looked in the painter's face and +laughed for joy. And he put out his hands as if welcoming some one, and +his countenance shone; and he said-- + +"My son had a great gift. He was a master born, though it was not given +to me. He shall paint it all for us so that the heart shall rejoice; and +you will come again and see." + +After that it happened to the little Pilgrim to enter into another great +palace where there were many people reading, and some sitting at their +desks and writing, and some consulting together, with many great volumes +stretched out open upon the tables. One of these who was seated alone +looked up as she paused, wondering at him, and smiled as every one did, +and greeted her with such a friendly tone that the Pilgrim, who always +had a great desire to know, came nearer to him and looked at the book, +then begged his pardon, and said she did not know that books were needed +here. And then he told her that he was one of the historians of the city +where all the records of the world were kept, and that it was his +business to work upon the great history, and to show what was the +meaning of the Father in everything that had happened, and how each +event came in its right place. + +"And do you get it out of books?" she asked; for she was not learned, +nor wise, and knew but little, though she always loved to know. + +"The books are the records," he said; "and there are many here that were +never known to us in the old days; for the angels love to look into +these things, and they can tell us much, for they saw it; and in the +great books they have kept there is much put down that was never in the +books we wrote; for then we did not know. We found out about the kings +and the state, and tried to understand what great purposes they were +serving; but even these we did not know, for those purposes were too +great for us, not knowing the end from the beginning; and the hearts of +men were too great for us. We comprehended the evil sometimes, but never +fathomed the good. And how could we know the lesser things which were +working out God's way? for some of these even the angels did not know; +and it has happened to me that our Lord Himself has come in sometimes to +tell me of one that none of us had discovered." + +"Oh," said the little Pilgrim, with tears in her eyes, "I should like to +have been that one!--that was not known even to the angels, but only to +Himself!" + +The historian smiled. "It was my brother," he said. + +The Pilgrim looked at him with great wonder. "Your brother, and you did +not know him!" + +And then he turned over the pages and showed her where the story was. + +"You know," he said, "that we who live here are not of your time, but +have lived and lived here till the old life is far away and like a +dream. There were great tumults and fightings in our time, and it was +settled by the prince of the place that our town was to be abandoned, +and all the people left to the mercy of an enemy who had no mercy. But +every day as he rode out he saw at one door a child, a little fair boy, +who sat on the steps, and sang his little song like a bird. This child +was never afraid of anything--when the horses pranced past him, and the +troopers pushed him aside, he looked up into their faces and smiled. And +when he had anything, a piece of bread, or an apple, or a plaything, he +shared it with his playmates; and his little face, and his pretty voice, +and all his pleasant ways, made that corner bright. He was like a flower +growing there; everybody smiled that saw him." + +"I have seen such a child," the little Pilgrim said. + +"But we made no account of him," said the historian. "The Lord of the +place came past him every day, and always saw him singing in the sun by +his father's door. And it was a wonder then, and it has been a wonder +ever since, why, having resolved upon it, that prince did not abandon +the town, which would have changed all his fortune after. Much had been +made clear to me since I began to study, but not this: till the Lord +Himself came to me and told me. The prince looked at the child till he +loved him, and he reflected how many children there were like this that +would be murdered, or starved to death, and he could not give up the +little singing boy to the sword. So he remained; and the town was saved, +and he became a great king. It was so secret that even the angels did +not know it. But without that child the history would not have been +complete." + +"And is he here?" the little Pilgrim said. + +"Ah," said the historian, "that is more strange still; for that which +saved him was also to his harm. He is not here. He is--elsewhere." + +The little Pilgrim's face grew sad; but then she remembered what she had +been told. + +"But you know," she said, "that he is coming?" + +"I know that our Father will never forsake him, and that everything +that is being accomplished in him is well." + +"Is it well to suffer? Is it well to live in that dark stormy country? +Oh, that they were all here, and happy like you!" + +He shook his head a little and said-- + +"It was a long time before I got here; and as for suffering that matters +little. You get experience by it. You are more accomplished and fit for +greater work in the end. It is not for nothing that we are permitted to +wander: and sometimes one goes to the edge of despair--" + +She looked at him with such wondering eyes that he answered her without +a word. + +"Yes," he said, "I have been there." + +And then it seemed to her that there was something in his eyes which she +had not remarked before. Not only the great content that was everywhere, +but a deeper light, and the air of a judge who knew both good and evil, +and could see both sides, and understood all, both to love and to hate. + +"Little sister," he said, "you have never wandered far--it is not +needful for such as you. Love teaches you, and you need no more; but +when we have to be trained for an office like this, to make the way of +the Lord clear through all the generations, reason is that we should see +everything, and learn all that man is and can be. These things are too +deep for us; we stumble on, and know not till after. But now to me it is +all clear." + +She looked at him again and again while he spoke, and it seemed to her +that she saw in him such great knowledge and tenderness as made her +glad; and how he could understand the follies that men had done, and +fathom what real meaning was in them, and disentangle all the threads. +He smiled as she gazed at him, and answered as if she had spoken. + +"What was evil perishes, and what was good remains; almost everywhere +there is a little good. We could not understand all if we had not seen +all and shared all." + +"And the punishment too," she said, wondering more and more. + +He smiled so joyfully that it was like laughter. + +"Pain is a great angel," he said. "The reason we hated him in the old +days was because he tended to death and decay; but when it is towards +life he leads, we fear him no more. The welcome thing of all in the land +of darkness is when you see him first and know who he is: for by this +you are aware that you have found the way." + +The little Pilgrim did nothing but question with her anxious eyes, for +this was such a wonder to her, and she could not understand. But he only +sat musing with a smile over the things he remembered. And at last he +said-- + +"If this is so interesting to you, you shall read it all in another +place, in the room where we have laid up our own experiences, in order +to serve for the history afterwards. But we are still busy upon the work +of the earth. There is always something new to be discovered. And it is +essential for the whole world that the chronicle should be full. I am in +great joy because it was but just now that our Lord told me about that +child. Everything was imperfect without him, but now it is clear." + +"You mean your brother? And you are happy though you are not sure if he +is happy?" the little Pilgrim said. + +"It is not to be happy that we live," said he; and then, "We are all +happy so soon as we have found the way." + +She would have asked him more, but that he was called to a consultation +with some others of his kind, and had to leave her, waving his hand to +her with a tender kindness, which went to her heart. She looked after +him with great respect, and almost awe; for it seemed to her that a man +who had been in the land of darkness, and made his way out of it, must +be more wonderful than any other. She looked round for a little upon +the great library, full of all the books that had ever been written, and +where people were doing their work, examining and reading and making +extracts, every one with looks of so much interest, that she almost +envied them--though it was a generous delight in seeing people so happy +in their occupation, and a desire to associate herself somehow in it, +rather than any grudging of their satisfaction that was in her mind. She +went about all the courts of this palace alone, and everywhere saw the +same work going on, and everywhere met the same kind looks. Even when +the greatest of all looked up from his work and saw her, he would give +her a friendly greeting and a smile; and nobody was too wise to lend an +ear to the little visitor, or to answer her questions. And this was how +it was that she began to talk to another, who was seated at a great +table with many more, and who drew her to him by something that was in +his looks, though she could not have told what it was. It was not that +he was kinder than the rest, for they were all kind. She stood by him a +little, and saw how he worked and would take something from one book and +something from another, putting them ready for use. And it did not seem +any trouble to do this work, but only pleasure, and the very pen in his +hand was like a winged thing, as if it loved to write. When he saw her +watching him, he looked up and showed her the beautiful book out of +which he was copying, which was all illuminated with lovely pictures. + +"This is one of the volumes of the great history," he said. "There are +some things in it which are needed for another, and it is a pleasure to +work at it. If you will come here you will be able to see the page while +I write." + +Then the little Pilgrim asked him some questions about the pictures, and +he answered her, describing and explaining them; for they were in the +middle of the history, and she did not understand what it was. When she +said, "I ought not to trouble you, for you are busy," he smiled so +kindly, that she smiled too for pleasure. And he said-- + +"There is no trouble here. When we are not allowed to work, as sometimes +happens, that makes us not quite so happy, but it is very seldom that it +happens so." + +"Is it for punishment?" she said. + +And then he laughed out with a sound which made all the others look up +smiling; and if they had not all looked so tenderly at her, as at a +child who has made such a mistake as it is pretty for the child to make, +she would have feared she had said something wrong; but she only laughed +at herself too, and blushed a little, knowing that she was not wise: and +to put her at her ease again, he turned the leaf and showed her other +pictures, and the story which went with them, from which he was copying +something. And he said-- + +"This is for another book, to show how the grace of the Father was +beautiful in some homes and families. It is not the great history, but +connected with it: and there are many who love that better than the +story which is more great." + +Then the Pilgrim looked in his face and said-- + +"What I want most is, to know about your homes here." + +"It is all home here," he said, and smiled; and then, as he met her +wistful looks, he went on to tell her that he and his brothers were not +always there. "We have all our occupations," he said, "and sometimes I +am sent to inquire into facts that have happened, of which the record is +not clear; for we must omit nothing; and sometimes we are told to rest +and take in new strength; and sometimes--" + +"But oh, forgive me," cried the little Pilgrim, "you had some who were +more dear to you than all the world in the old time?" + +And the others all looked up again at the question, and looked at her +with tender eyes, and said to the man whom she questioned, "Speak!" + +He made a little pause before he spoke, and he looked at one here and +there, and called to them-- + +"Patience, brother," and "Courage, brother." And then he said, "Those +whom we loved best are nearly all with us; but some have not yet come." + +"Oh," said the little Pilgrim, "but how then do you bear it, to be +parted so long--so long?" + +Then one of those to whom the first speaker had called out "Patience" +rose, and came to her smiling; and he said-- + +"I think every hour that perhaps she will come, and the joy will be so +great, that thinking of that makes the waiting short: and nothing here +is long, for it never ends; and it will be so wonderful to hear her tell +how the Father has guided her, that it will be a delight to us all; and +she will be able to explain many things, not only for us, but for all; +and we love each other so, that this separation is as nothing in +comparison with what is to come." + +It was beautiful to hear this, but it was not what the little Pilgrim +expected, for she thought they would have told her of the homes to which +they all returned when their work was over, and a life which was like +the life of the old time; but of this they said nothing, only looking at +her with smiling eyes, as at the curious questions of a child. And there +were many other things she would have asked, but refrained when she +looked at them, feeling as if she did not yet understand; when one of +them broke forth suddenly in a louder voice, and said-- + +"The little sister knows only the little language and the beginning of +days. She has not learned the mysteries, and what Love is, and what life +is." + +And another cried, "It is sweet to hear it again;" and they all gathered +round her with tender looks, and began to talk to each other, and tell +her, as men will tell of the games of their childhood, of things that +happened, which were half forgotten, in the old time. + +After this the little Pilgrim went out again into the beautiful city, +feeling in her heart that everything was a mystery, and that the days +would never be long enough to learn all that had yet to be learned, but +knowing now that this, too, was the little language, and pleased with +the sweet thought of so much that was to come. For one had whispered to +her as she went out that the new tongue, and every explanation, as she +was ready for it, would come to her through one of those whom she loved +best, which is the usage of that country. And when the stranger has no +one there that is very dear, then it is an angel who teaches the greater +language, and this is what happens often to the children who are brought +up in that heavenly place. When she reached the street again, she was so +pleased with this thought that it went out of her mind to ask her way +to the great library, where she was to read the story of the historian's +journey through the land of darkness; indeed she forgot that land +altogether, and thought only of what was around her in the great city +which is beyond everything that eye has seen, or that ear has heard, or +that it has entered into the imagination to conceive. And now it seemed +to her that she was much more familiar with the looks of the people, and +could distinguish between those who belonged to the city, and those who +were visitors like herself; and also could tell which they were who had +entered into the mysteries of the kingdom, and which were, like herself, +only acquainted with the beginning of days. And it came to her mind--she +could not tell how--that it was best not to ask questions, but to wait +until the beloved one should come, who would teach her the first words. +For in the meantime she did not feel at all impatient or disturbed by +her want of knowledge, but laughed a little at herself to suppose that +she could find out everything, and went on looking round her, and saying +a word to every one she met, and enjoying the holiday looks of all the +strangers, and the sense she had in her heart of holiday too. She was +walking on in this pleasant way, when she heard a sound that was like +silver trumpets, and saw the crowd turn towards an open space in which +all the beautiful buildings were shaded with fine trees, and flowers +were springing at the very edge of the pavements. The strangers all +hastened along to hear what it was, and she with them, and some also of +the people of the place. And as the little Pilgrim found herself walking +by a woman who was of these last, she asked her what it was. + +And the woman told her it was a poet who had come to say to them what +had been revealed to him, and that the two with the silver trumpets were +angels of the musicians' order, whose office it was to proclaim +everything that was new, that the people should know. And many of those +who were at work in the palaces came out and joined the crowd, and the +painter who had showed the little Pilgrim his picture, and many whose +faces she began to be acquainted with. The poet stood up upon a +beautiful pedestal all sculptured in stone, and with wreaths of living +flowers hung upon it--and when the crowd had gathered in front of him, +he began his poem. He told them that it was not about this land, or +anything that happened in it, which they knew as he did, but that it was +a story of the old time, when men were walking in darkness, and when no +one knew the true meaning even of what he himself did, but had to go on +as if blindly, stumbling and groping with their hands. And, "Oh, +brethren," he said, "though all is more beautiful and joyful here where +we know, yet to remember the days when we knew not, and the ways when +all was uncertain, and the end could not be distinguished from the +beginning, is sweet and dear; and that which was done in the dim +twilight should be celebrated in the day; and our Father Himself loves +to hear of those who, having not seen, loved, and who learned without +any teacher, and followed the light, though they did not understand." + +And then he told them the story of one who had lived in the old time; +and in that air, which seemed to be made of sunshine, and amid all those +stately palaces, he described to them the little earth which they had +left behind--the skies that were covered with clouds, and the ways that +were so rough and stony, and the cruelty of the oppressor, and the cries +of those that were oppressed. And he showed the sickness and the +troubles, and the sorrow and danger; and how death stalked about, and +tore heart from heart; and how sometimes the strongest would fail, and +the truest fall under the power of a lie, and the tenderest forget to be +kind; and how evil things lurked in every corner to beguile the dwellers +there; and how the days were short and the nights dark, and life so +little that by the time a man had learned something it was his hour to +die. "What can a soul do that is born there?" he cried; "for war is +there and fighting, and perplexity and darkness; and no man knows if +that which he does will be for good or evil, or can tell which is the +best way, or know the end from the beginning; and those he loves the +most are a mystery to him, and their thoughts beyond his reach. And +clouds are between him and the Father, and he is deceived with false +gods and false teachers, who make him to love a lie." The people who +were listening held their breath, and a shadow like a cloud fell on +them, and they remembered and knew that it was true. But the next moment +their hearts rebelled, and one and another would have spoken, and the +little Pilgrim herself had almost cried out and made her plea for the +dear earth which she loved: when he suddenly threw forth his voice again +like a great song. "Oh, dear mother earth," he cried; "oh, little world +and great, forgive thy son! for lovely thou art and dear, and the sun of +God shines upon thee and the sweet dews fall; and there were we born, +and loved, and died, and are come hence to bless the Father and the Son. +For in no other world, though they are so vast, is it given to any to +know the Lord in the darkness, and follow Him groping, and make way +through sin and death, and overcome the evil, and conquer in His Name." +At which there was a great sound of weeping and of triumph, and the +little Pilgrim could not contain herself, but cried out too in joy as if +for a deliverance. And then the poet told his tale. And as he told them +of the man who was poor and sorrowful and alone, and how he loved and +was not loved again, and trusted and was betrayed, and was tempted and +drawn into the darkness, so that it seemed as if he must perish; but, +when hope was almost gone, turned again from the edge of despair, and +confronted all his enemies, and fought and conquered, the people +followed every word with great outcries of love and pity and wonder. For +each one as he listened remembered his own career and that of his +brethren in the old life, and admired to think that all the evil was +past, and wondered how, out of such tribulation and through so many +dangers, all were safe and blessed here. And there were others that were +not of them, who listened, some seated at the windows of the palaces and +some standing in the great square--people who were not like the others, +whose bearing was more majestic, and who looked upon the crowd all +smiling and weeping with wonder and interest, but had no knowledge of +the cause, and listened as it were to a tale that is told. The poet and +his audience were as one, and at every period of the story there was a +deep breathing and pause, and every one looked at his neighbour, and +some grasped each other's hands as they remembered all that was in the +past; but the strangers listened and gazed and observed all, as those +who listen and are instructed in something beyond their knowledge. The +little Pilgrim stood all this time not knowing where she was, so intent +was she upon the tale, and as she listened it seemed to her that all her +own life was rolling out before her, and she remembered the things that +had been, and perceived how all had been shaped and guided, and trembled +a little for the brother who was in danger, yet knew that all would be +well. + +The woman who had been at her side listened too with all her heart, +saying to herself as she stood in the crowd, "He has left nothing out! +The little days they were so short, and the skies would change all in a +moment and one's heart with them. How he brings it all back!" And she +put up her hand to dry away a tear from her eyes, though her face all +the time was shining with the recollection. The little Pilgrim was glad +to be by the side of a woman after talking with so many men, and she put +out her hand and touched the cloak that this lady wore, and which was +white and of the most beautiful texture, with gold threads woven in it, +or something that looked like gold. + +"Do you like," she said, "to think of the old time?" + +The woman turned and looked down upon her, for she was tall and stately, +and immediately took the hand of the little Pilgrim into hers, and held +it without answering, till the poet had ended and come down from the +place where he had been standing. He came straight through the crowd to +where this lady stood, and said something to her. "You did well to tell +me," looking at her with love in his eyes--not the tender sweetness of +all those kind looks around, but the love that is for one. The little +Pilgrim looked at them with her heart beating, and was very glad for +them, and happy in herself, for she had not seen this love before since +she came into the city, and it had troubled her to think that perhaps it +did not exist any more. "I am glad," the lady said, and gave him her +other hand; "but here is a little sister who asks me something, and I +must answer her. I think she has but newly come." + +"She has a face full of the morning," the poet said. It did the little +Pilgrim good to feel the touch of the warm, soft hand, and she was not +afraid, but lifted her eyes and spoke to the lady, and to the poet. "It +is beautiful what you said to us. Sometimes in the old time we used to +look up to the beautiful skies and wonder what there was above the +clouds, but we never thought that up here in this great city you would +be thinking of what we were doing, and making beautiful poems all about +us. We thought that you would sing wonderful psalms, and talk of things +high, high above us." + +"The little sister does not know what the meaning of the earth is," the +poet said. "It is but a little speck, but it is the centre of all. Let +her walk with us, and we will go home, and you will tell her, Ama, for +I love to hear you talk." + +"Will you come with us?" the lady said. + +And the little Pilgrim's heart leaped up in her, to think she was now +going to see a home in this wonderful city; and they went along hand in +hand, and though they were three together, and many were coming and +going, there was no difficulty, for every one made way for them. And +there was a little murmur of pleasure as the poet passed, and those who +had heard his poem made obeisance to him, and thanked him, and thanked +the Father for him, that he was able to show them so many beautiful +things. And they walked along the street which was shining with colour, +and saw, as they passed, how the master painter had come to his work, +and was standing upon the balcony where the little Pilgrim had been, and +bringing out of the wall, under his hand, faces which were full of life, +and which seemed to spring forth as if they had been hidden there. "Let +us wait a little and see him working," the poet said: and all round +about the people stopped on their way, and there was a soft cry of +pleasure and praise all through the beautiful street. And the painter +with whom the little Pilgrim had talked before came, and stood behind +her as if he had been an old friend, and called out to her at every new +touch to mark how this and that was done. She did not understand as he +did, but she saw how beautiful it was, and she was glad to have seen the +great painter, as she had been glad to hear the great poet. It seemed to +the little Pilgrim as if everything happened well for her, and that no +one had ever been so blessed before. And to make it all more sweet, this +new friend, this great and sweet lady, always held her hand, and pressed +it softly when something more lovely appeared; and even the pictured +faces on the wall seemed to beam upon her, as they came out one by one +like the stars in the sky. Then the three went on again, and passed by +many more beautiful palaces, and great streets leading away into the +light, till you could see no farther; and they met with bands of +singers, who sang so sweetly that the heart seemed to leap out of the +Pilgrim's breast to meet with them, for above all things this was what +she had loved most. And out of one of the palaces there came such +glorious music, that everything she had seen and heard before seemed as +nothing in comparison. And amid all these delights they went on and on, +but without wearying, till they came out of the streets into lovely +walks and alleys, and made their way to the banks of a great river, +which seemed to sing too, a soft melody of its own. + +And here there were some fair houses surrounded by gardens and flowers +that grew everywhere, and the doors were all open, and within everything +was lovely and still, and ready for rest if you were weary. The little +Pilgrim was not weary, but the lady placed her upon a couch in the +porch, where the pillars and the roof were all formed of interlacing +plants and flowers; and there they sat with her and talked, and +explained to her many things. They told her that the earth, though so +small, was the place in all the world to which the thoughts of those +above were turned. "And not only of us who have lived there, but of all +our brothers in the other worlds; for we are the race which the Father +has chosen to be the example. In every age there is one that is the +scene of the struggle and the victory, and it is for this reason that +the chronicles are made, and that we are all placed here to gather the +meaning of what has been done among men. And I am one of those," the +lady said, "that go back to the dear earth and gather up the tale of +what our little brethren are doing. I have not to succour, like some +others, but only to see and bring the news; and he makes them into great +poems as you have heard; and sometimes the master painter will take one +and make of it a picture; and there is nothing that is so delightful to +us as when we can bring back the histories of beautiful things." + +"But, oh," said the little Pilgrim, "what can there be on earth so +beautiful as the meanest thing that is here?" + +Then they both smiled upon her and said, "It is more beautiful than the +most beautiful thing here to see how, under the low skies and in the +short days, a soul will turn to our Father. And sometimes," said Ama, +"when I am watching, one will wander and stray, and be led into the dark +till my heart is sick; then come back and make me glad. Sometimes I cry +out within myself to the Father, and say, 'Oh, my Father, it is enough!' +and it will seem to me that it is not possible to stand by and see his +destruction. And then while you are gazing, while you are crying, he +will recover and return, and go on again. And to the angels it is more +wonderful than to us, for they have never lived there. And all the other +worlds are eager to hear what we can tell them. For no one knows except +the Father how the battle will turn, or when it will all be +accomplished; and there are some who tremble for our little brethren. +For to look down and see how little light there is, and how no one knows +what may happen to him next, makes them afraid who never were there." + +The little Pilgrim listened with an intent face, clasping her hands, and +said--"But it never could be that our Father should be overcome by evil. +Is not that known in all the worlds?" + +Then the lady turned and kissed her: and the poet broke forth in +singing, and said, "Faith is more heavenly than heaven; it is more +beautiful than the angels. It is the only voice that can answer to our +Father. We praise Him, we glorify Him, we love His name, but there is +but one response to Him through all the worlds, and that is the cry of +the little brothers, who see nothing and know nothing, but believe that +He will never fail." + +At this the little Pilgrim wept, for her heart was touched: but she +said--"We are not so ignorant: for we have our Lord who is our Brother, +and He teaches us all that we require to know." + +Upon this the poet rose and lifted up his hands and spoke once more; but +it was as if he spoke to others, to some one at a distance; it was in +the other language which the little Pilgrim still did not understand, +but she could make out that it sounded like a great proclamation that He +was wise as He was good, and called upon all to see that the Lord had +chosen the only way. And the sound of the poet's voice was like a great +trumpet sounding bold and sweet, as if to tell this to those who were +far away. + +"For you must know," said the Lady Ama, who all the time held the +Pilgrim's hand, "that it is permitted to all to judge according to the +wisdom that has been given them. And there are some who think that our +dear Lord might have found another way, and that wait, sometimes with +trembling, lest He should fail; but not among us who have lived on +earth, for we know. And it is our work to show to all the worlds that +His way never fails, and how wonderful it is, and beautiful above all +that heart has conceived. And thus we justify the ways of God, who is +our Father. But in the other worlds there are many who will continue to +fear until the history of the earth is all ended and the chronicles are +made complete." + +"And will that be long?" the little Pilgrim cried, feeling in her heart +that she would like to go to all the worlds and tell them of our Lord, +and of His love, and how the thought of Him makes you strong; and it +troubled her a little to hear her friends speak of the low skies and the +short days, and the dimness of that dear country which she had left +behind, in which there were so many still whom she loved. + +Upon this Ama shook her head, and said that of that day no one knew, not +even our Lord, but only the Father: and then she smiled and answered +the little Pilgrim's thought. "When we go back," she said, "it is not as +when we lived there; for now we see all the dangers of it and the +mysteries which we did not see before. It was by the Father's dear love +that we did not see what was around us and about us while we lived +there, for then our hearts would have fainted: and that makes us wonder +now that any one endures to the end." + +"You are a great deal wiser than I am," said the little Pilgrim; "but +though our hearts had fainted how could we have been overcome? for He +was on our side." + +At this neither of them made any reply at first, but looked at her; and +at length the poet said that she had brought many thoughts back to his +mind, and how he had himself been almost worsted when one like her came +to him and gave strength to his soul. "For that He was on our side was +the only thing she knew," he said, "and all that could be learned or +discovered was not worthy of naming beside it. And this I must tell +when next I speak to the people, and how our little sister brought it to +my mind." + +And then they paused from this discourse, and the little Pilgrim looked +round upon the beautiful houses and the fair gardens, and she said-- + +"You live here? and do you come home at night?--but I do not mean at +night, I mean when your work is done. And are they poets like you that +dwell all about in these pleasant places, and the--" + +She would have said the children, but stopped, not knowing if perhaps it +might be unkind to speak of the children when she saw none there. + +Upon this the lady smiled once more, and said-- + +"The door stands open always, so that no one is shut out, and the +children come and go when they will. They are children no longer, and +they have their appointed work like him and me." + +"And you are always among those you love?" the Pilgrim said; upon which +they smiled again and said, "We all love each other;" and the lady held +her hand in both of hers, and caressed it, and softly laughed, and said, +"You know only the little language. When you have been taught the other +you will learn many beautiful things." + +She rested for some time after this, and talked much with her new +friends: and then there came into the heart of the little Pilgrim a +longing to go to the place which was appointed for her, and which was +her home, and to do the work which had been given her to do. And when +the lady saw this she rose and said that she would accompany her a +little upon her way. But the poet bade her farewell and remained under +the porch, with the green branches shading him, and the flowers twining +round the pillars, and the open door of his beautiful house behind him. +When she looked back upon him he waved his hand to her as if bidding +her God-speed, and the lady by her side looked back too and waved her +hand, and the little Pilgrim felt tears of happiness come to her eyes; +for she had been wondering with a little disappointment to see that the +people in the city, except those who were strangers, were chiefly alone, +and not like those in the old world where the husband and wife go +together. It consoled her to see again two who were one. The lady +pressed her hand in answer to her thought, and bade her pause a moment +and look back into the city as they passed the end of the great street +out of which they came. And then the Pilgrim was more and more consoled, +for she saw many who had before been alone now walking together hand in +hand. + +"It is not as it was," Ama said. "For all of us have work to do which is +needed for the worlds, and it is no longer needful that one should sit +at home while the other goes forth; for our work is not for our life as +of old, or for ourselves, but for the Father who has given us so great +a trust. And, little sister, you must know that though we are not so +great as the angels, nor as many that come to visit us from the other +worlds, yet we are nearer to Him. For we are in His secret, and it is +ours to make it clear." + +The little Pilgrim's heart was very full to hear this; but she said-- + +"I was never clever, nor knew much. It is better for me to go away to my +little border-land, and help the strangers who do not know the way." + +"Whatever is your work is the best," the lady said; "but though you are +so little you are in the Father's secret too; for it is nature to you to +know what the others cannot be sure of, that we must have the victory at +the last. So that we have this between us, the Father and we. And though +all are His children, we are of the kindred of God, because of our Lord +who is our Brother;" and then the Lady Ama kissed her, and bade her when +she returned to the great city, either for rest or for love, or because +the Father sent for her, that she should come to the house by the river. +"For we are friends for ever," she said, and so threw her white veil +over her head, and was gone upon her mission, whither the little Pilgrim +did not know. + +And now she found herself at a distance from the great city which shone +in the light with its beautiful towers, and roofs, and all its +monuments, softly fringed with trees, and set in a heavenly firmament. +And the Pilgrim thought of those words that described this lovely place +as a bride adorned for her husband, and did not wonder at him who had +said that her streets were of gold and her gates of pearl, because gold +and pearls and precious jewels were as nothing to the glory and the +beauty of her. The little Pilgrim was glad to have seen these wonderful +things, and her mind was like a cup running over with almost more than +it could contain. It seemed to her that there never could be a time +when she should want for wonder and interest and delight so long as she +had this to think of. Yet she was not sorry to turn her back upon the +beautiful city, but went on her way singing in unutterable content, and +thinking over what the lady had said, that we were in God's secret, more +than all the great worlds above and even the angels, because of knowing +how it is that in darkness and doubt, and without any open vision, a man +may still keep the right way. The path lay along the bank of the river +which flowed beside her and made the air full of music, and a soft air +blew across the running stream and breathed in her face and refreshed +her, and the birds sang in all the trees. And as she passed through the +villages the people came out to meet her, and asked of her if she had +come from the city, and what she had seen there. And everywhere she +found friends, and kind voices that gave her greeting. But some would +ask her why she still spoke the little language, though it was sweet to +their ears; and others when they heard it hastened to call from the +houses and the fields some among them who knew the other tongue but a +little, and who came and crowded round the little Pilgrim and asked her +many questions both about the things she had been seeing and about the +old time. And she perceived that the village folk were a simple folk, +not learned and wise like those she had left. And that though they lived +within sight of the great city, and showed every stranger the beautiful +view of it, and the glory of its towers, yet few among them had +travelled there; for they were so content with their fields and their +river, and the shade of their trees and the birds singing, and their +simple life, that they wanted no change; though it pleased them to +receive the little Pilgrim, and they brought her in to their villages +rejoicing, and called every one to see her. And they told her that they +had all been poor and laboured hard in the old time, and had never +rested; so that now it was the Father's good pleasure that they should +enjoy great peace and consolation among the fresh-breathing fields and +on the riverside, so that there were many who even now had little +occupation except to think of the Father's goodness and to rest. And +they told her how the Lord Himself would come among them, and sit down +under a tree, and tell them one of His parables, and make them all more +happy than words could say; and how sometimes He would send one out of +the beautiful city, with a poem or tale to say to them, and bands of +lovely music, more lovely than anything beside, except the sound of the +Lord's own voice. "And what is more wonderful, the angels themselves +come often and listen to us," they said, "when we begin to talk and +remind each other of the old time, and how we suffered heat and cold, +and were bowed down with labour, and bending over the soil; and how +sometimes the harvest would fail us, and sometimes we had not bread, and +sometimes would hush the children to sleep because there was nothing to +give them; and how we grew old and weary, and still worked on and on." +"We are those who were old," a number of them called out to her, with a +murmuring sound of laughter, one looking over another's shoulder. And +one woman said, "The angels say to us, 'Did you never think the Father +had forsaken you and the Lord forgotten you?'" And all the rest answered +as in a chorus, "There were moments that we thought this; but all the +time we knew that it could not be." "And the angels wonder at us," said +another. All this they said, crowding one before another, every one +anxious to say something, and sometimes speaking together, but always in +accord. And then there was a sound of laughter and pleasure, both at the +strange thought that the Lord could have forgotten them, and at the +wonder of the angels over their simple tales. And immediately they began +to remind each other, and say, "Do you remember?" and they told the +little Pilgrim a hundred tales of the hardships and troubles they had +known, all smiling and radiant with pleasure; and at every new account +the others would applaud and rejoice, feeling the happiness all the more +for the evils that were past. And some of them led her into their +gardens to show her their flowers, and to tell her how they had begun to +study and learn how colours were changed and form perfected, and the +secrets of the growth and of the germ of which they had been ignorant. +And others arranged themselves in choirs, and sang to her delightful +songs of the fields, and accompanied her out upon her way, singing and +answering to each other. The difference between the simple folk and the +greatness of the others made the little Pilgrim wonder and admire, and +she loved them in her simplicity, and turned back many a time to wave +her hand to them, and to listen to the lovely simple singing as it went +farther and farther away. It had an evening tone of rest and quietness, +and of protection and peace. "He leadeth me by the green pastures and +beside the quiet waters," she said to herself: and her heart swelled +with pleasure to think that it was those who had been so old, and so +weary and poor, who had this rest to console them for all their sorrows. + +And as she went along, not only did she pass through many other +villages, but met many on the way who were travelling towards the great +city, and would greet her sweetly as they passed, and sometimes stop to +say a pleasant word, so that the little Pilgrim was never lonely +wherever she went. But most of them began to speak to her in the other +language, which was as beautiful and sweet as music, but which she could +not understand: and they were surprised to find her ignorant of it, not +knowing that she was but a new-comer into these lands. And there were +many things that could not be told but in that language, for the earthly +tongue had no words to express them. The little Pilgrim was a little +sad not to understand what was said to her, but cheered herself with the +thought that it should be taught to her by one whom she loved best. The +way by the riverside was very cheerful and bright, with many people +coming and going, and many villages, some of them with a bridge across +the stream, some withdrawn among the fields, but all of them bright and +full of life, and with sounds of music, and voices, and footsteps: and +the little Pilgrim felt no weariness, but moved along as lightly as a +child, taking great pleasure in everything she saw, and answering all +the friendly greetings with all her heart, yet glad to think that she +was approaching ever nearer to the country where it was ordained that +she should dwell for a time and succour the strangers, and receive those +who were newly arrived. And she consoled herself with the thought that +there was no need of any language but that which she knew. As this went +through her mind making her glad she suddenly became aware of one who +was walking by her side, a lady who was covered with a veil white and +shining like that which Ama had worn in the beautiful city. It hung +about this stranger's head so that it was not easy to see her face, and +the sound of her voice was very sweet in the Pilgrim's ear, yet startled +her like the sound of something which she knew well, but could not +remember. And as there were few who were going that way, she was glad, +and said, "Let us walk together, if that pleases you." And the stranger +said, "It is for that I have come," which was a reply which made the +little Pilgrim wonder more and more, though she was very glad and joyful +to have this companion upon her way. And then the lady began to ask her +many questions, not about the city, or the great things she had seen, +but about herself, and what the dear Lord had given her to do. + +"I am little and weak, and I cannot do much," the little Pilgrim said. +"It is nothing but pleasure. It is to welcome those that are coming, +and tell them. Sometimes they are astonished and do not know. I was so +myself. I came in my sleep, and understood nothing. But now that I know, +it is sweet to tell them that they need not fear." + +"I was glad," the lady said, "that you came in your sleep: for sometimes +the way is dark and hard, and you are little and tender. When your +brother comes you will be the first to see him, and show him the way." + +"My brother! is he coming?" the little Pilgrim cried. And then she said +with a wistful look, "But we are all brethren, and you mean only one of +those who are the children of our Father. You must forgive me that I do +not know the higher speech, but only what is natural, for I have not yet +been long here." + +"He whom I mean is called--" and here the lady said a name which was the +true name of a brother born, whom the Pilgrim loved above all others. +She gave a cry, and then she said trembling, "I know your voice, but I +cannot see your face. And what you say makes me think of many things. No +one else has covered her face when she has spoken to me. I know you, and +yet I cannot tell who you are." + +The woman stood for a little without saying a word, and then very +softly, in a voice which only the heart heard, she called the little +Pilgrim by her name. + +"MOTHER," cried the Pilgrim, with such a cry of joy that it echoed all +about in the sweet air: and flung herself upon the veiled lady, and drew +the veil from her face, and saw that it was she. And with this sight +there came a revelation which flooded her soul with happiness. For the +face which had been old and feeble was old no longer, but fair in the +maturity of day; and the figure that had been bent and weary was full of +a tender majesty, and the arms that clasped her about were warm and soft +with love and life. And all that had changed their relations in the +other days and made the mother in her weakness seem as a child, and +transferred all protection and strength to the daughter, was gone for +ever: and the little Pilgrim beheld in a rapture one who was her sister +and equal, yet ever above her--more near to her than any, though all +were so near--one of whom she herself was a part, yet another, and who +knew all her thoughts and the way of them before they arose in her. And +to see her face as in the days of her prime, and her eyes so clear and +wise, and to feel once more that which is different from the love of +all, that which is still most sweet where all is sweet, the love of +one--was like a crown to her in her happiness. The little Pilgrim could +not think for joy, nor say a word, but held this dear mother's hands and +looked in her face, and her heart soared away to the Father in thanks +and joy. They sat down by the roadside under the shade of the trees, +while the river ran softly by, and everything was hushed out of +sympathy and kindness, and questioned each other of all that had been +and was to be. And the little Pilgrim told all the little news of home, +and of the brothers and sisters and the children that had been born, and +of those whose faces were turned towards this better country; and the +mother smiled and listened and would have heard all over and over, +although many things she already knew. "But why should I tell you? for +did not you watch over us and see all we did, and were not you near us +always?" the little Pilgrim said. + +"How could that be?" said the mother; "for we are not like our Lord, to +be everywhere. We come and go where we are sent. But sometimes we knew +and sometimes saw, and always loved. And whenever our hearts were sick +for news it was but to go to Him, and He told us everything. And now, my +little one, you are as we are, and have seen the Lord. And this has been +given us, to teach our child once more, and show you the heavenly +language, that you may understand all, both the little and the great." + +Then the Pilgrim lifted her head from her mother's bosom, and looked in +her face with eyes full of longing. "You said 'we,'" she said. + +The mother did nothing but smile; then lifted her eyes and looked along +the beautiful path of the river to where some one was coming to join +them; and the little Pilgrim cried out again, in wonder and joy; and +presently found herself seated between them, her father and her mother, +the two who had loved her most in the other days. They looked more +beautiful than the angels and all the great persons whom she had seen; +for still they were hers and she was theirs, more than all the angels +and all the blessed could be. And thus she learned that though the new +may take the place of the old, and many things may blossom out of it +like flowers, yet that the old is never done away. And then they sat +together, telling of everything that had befallen, and all the little +tender things that were of no import, and all the great changes and +noble ways, and the wonders of heaven above and the earth beneath, for +all were open to them, both great and small; and when they had satisfied +their souls with these, her father and mother began to teach her the +other language, smiling often at her faltering tongue, and telling her +the same thing over and over till she learned it; and her father called +her his little foolish one, as he had done in the old days; and at last, +when they had kissed her and blessed her, and told her how to come home +to them when she was weary, they gave her, as the Father had permitted +them, with joy and blessing, her new name. + +The little Pilgrim was tired with happiness and all the wonder and +pleasure, and as she sat there in the silence leaning upon those who +were so dear to her, the soft air grew sweeter and sweeter about her, +and the light faded softly into a dimness of tender indulgence and +privilege for her, because she was still little and weak. And whether +that heavenly suspense of all her faculties was sleep or not she knew +not, but it was such as in all her life she had never known. When she +came back to herself, it was by the sound of many voices calling her, +and many people hastening past and beckoning to her to join them. + +"Come, come," they said, "little sister: there has been great trouble in +the other life, and many have arrived suddenly and are afraid. Come, +come, and help them--come and help them!" + +And she sprang up from her soft seat, and found that she was no longer +by the riverside, or within sight of the great city or in the arms of +those she loved, but stood on one of the flowery paths of her own +border-land, and saw her fellows hastening towards the gates where there +seemed a great crowd. And she was no longer weary, but full of life and +strength, and it seemed to her that she could take them up in her arms, +those trembling strangers, and carry them straight to the Father, so +strong was she, and light, and full of force. And above all the gladness +she had felt, and all her pleasure in what she had seen, and more happy +even than the meeting with those she loved most, was her happiness now, +as she went along as light as the breeze to receive the strangers. She +was so eager that she began to sing a song of welcome as she hastened +on. "Oh, welcome, welcome!" she cried; and as she sang she knew it was +one of the heavenly melodies which she had heard in the great city: and +she hastened on, her feet flying over the flowery ways, thinking how the +great worlds were all watching, and the angels looking on, and the whole +universe waiting till it should be proved to them that the dear Lord, +the Brother of us all, had chosen the perfect way, and that over all the +evil and the sorrow He was the Conqueror alone. + +And the little Pilgrim's voice, though it was so small, echoed away +through the great firmament to where the other worlds were watching to +see what should come, and cheered the anxious faces of some great lords +and princes far more great than she, who were of a nobler race than man; +for it was said among the stars that when such a little sound could +reach so far, it was a token that the Lord had chosen aright, and that +His method must be the best. And it breathed over the earth like some +one saying, Courage! to those whose hearts were failing; and it dropped +down, down, into the great confusions and traffic of the Land of +Darkness, and startled many, like the cry of a child calling and +calling, and never ceasing, "Come! and come! and come!" + +THE END. + +Printed by R. & R. CLARK, LIMITED, Edinburgh. + + + + +COMPLETE EDITIONS OF THE POETS. + +Uniform Edition. In Green Cloth. + + +THE COMPLETE WORKS OF ALFRED, LORD TENNYSON. + +With a Portrait engraved on Steel by G.J. STODART. Crown 8vo. 7s. 6d. + + +THE POETICAL WORKS OF MATTHEW ARNOLD. + +With a Portrait engraved on Steel by G.J. STODART. Crown 8vo. 7s. 6d. + + +THE POETICAL WORKS OF JAMES RUSSELL LOWELL. + +With Introduction by THOMAS HUGHES, and a Portrait. Crown 8vo. 7s. 6d. + + +THE POETICAL WORKS OF PERCY BYSSHE SHELLEY. + +Edited by Professor DOWDEN. With a Portrait. Crown 8vo. 7s. 6d. + + +THE POETICAL WORKS OF SAMUEL TAYLOR COLERIDGE. + +Edited, with a Biographical Introduction, by J. DYKES CAMPBELL. Portrait +as Frontispiece. Crown 8vo. 7s. 6d. + + +THE POETICAL WORKS OF WILLIAM WORDSWORTH. + +With Introduction by JOHN MORLEY, and a Portrait. Crown 8vo. 7s. 6d. + + +THE COMPLETE POETICAL WORKS OF T.E. BROWN. + +With a Portrait; and an Introduction by W.E. HENLEY. Crown 8vo. 7s. 6d. + + +THE COMPLETE POETICAL WORKS OF CHRISTINA ROSSETTI. + +With Introduction, Memoir, and Notes, by W.M. ROSSETTI. Crown 8vo. 7s. +6d. + + +THE BAB BALLADS, with which are included Songs of a Savoyard. + +By W.S. GILBERT. Sixth Edition. Illustrated. Crown 8vo. 7s. 6d. + + +THE INGOLDSBY LEGENDS. + +With 20 Illustrations on Steel by CRUIKSHANK, LEECH, and BARHAM. Crown +8vo. 7s. 6d. + +MACMILLAN AND CO., LTD., LONDON. + + * * * * * + +THE WORKS OF LORD TENNYSON. + +THE WORKS OF ALFRED, LORD TENNYSON. Complete Edition. With a Portrait. +Crown 8vo. 7s. 6d. India Paper Edition. Leather, gilt edges. 10s. 6d. +net. + + +POCKET CLASSICS EDITION.. In Five volumes. Cloth, 2s. net each. +Leather, 3s. net each. + +1. JUVINILIA AND ENGLISH IDYLS. + +2. IN MEMORIAM, MAUD, and other Poems. + +3. BALLADS, and other Poems. + +4. IDYLLS OF THE KING. + +5. DRAMAS. + + +LIBRARY EDITION. In Nine Vols. Globe 8vo. 5s. each. May be had +separately. + +1. EARLY POEMS. + +2. EARLY POEMS. + +3. IDYLLS OF THE KING. + +4. THE PRINCESS, AND MAUD. + +5. ENOCH ARDEN, AND IN MEMORIAM. + +6. BALLADS, and other Poems. + +7. QUEEN MARY, AND HAROLD. + +8. BECKET, and other Plays. + +9. DEMETER, and other Poems. + + +GLOBE 8vo EDITION. On hand-made paper. In Ten Vols. Supplied in sets +only. 105s. + +POETICAL WORKS. Globe Edition. Crown 8vo. 3s. 6d. Extra cloth, gilt +edges. 4s. 6d. Limp leather, gilt edges. 5s net. + + +POETICAL WORKS. Peoples Edition. In Twelve Vols. 16mo. 1s. net each. +Complete in box, 14s. net. + +1. JUVENILIA AND LADY OF SHALOTT. + +2. A DREAM OF FAIR WOMEN AND LOCKSLEY HALL. + +3. THE PRINCESS. + +4. WILL WATERPROOF AND ENOCH ARDEN. + +5. IN MEMORIAM. + +6. MAUD AND THE BROOK. + +7. IDYLLS OF THE KING, I. + +8. " " " " II. + +9. " " " " III. + +10. THE LOVER'S TALE AND RIZPAH. + +11. THE VOYAGE OF MAELDUNE AND THE SPINSTER'S SWEET-ARTS. + +12. DEMETER AND THE DEATH OF OENONE. + + +POETICAL WORKS. In Twenty-three Vols. Cloth, 1s. net, and leather, 1s. +6d. net each Volume. In cloth case, 25s. net; Leather, in cloth cabinet, +36s. net. + +1. JUVENILIA. + +2. THE LADY OF SHALOTT, and other Poems. + +3. A DREAM OF FAIR WOMEN, and other Poems. + +4. LOCKSLEY HALL, and other Poems. + +5. WILL WATERPROOF, and other Poems. + +6. THE PRINCESS. Books I. to III. + +7. THE PRINCESS. Book IV. to end. + +8. ENOCH ARDEN, and other Poems. + +9. IN MEMORIAM. + +10. MAUD, THE WINDOW, and other Poems. + +11. THE BROOK, and other Poems. + +12. IDYLLS OF THE KING: THE COMING OF ARTHUR, GARETH AND LYNETTE. + +13. IDYLLS OF THE KING: THE MARRIAGE OF GERAINT, GERAINT AND ENID. + +14. IDYLLS OF THE KING: BALIN AND BALAN, MERLIN AND VIVIEN. + +15. IDYLLS OF THE KING: LANCELOT AND ELAINE. THE HOLY GRAIL. + +16. IDYLLS OF THE KING: PELLEAS AND ETTARRE, THE LAST TOURNAMENT. + +17. IDYLLS OF THE KING: GUINEVERE, THE PASSING OF ARTHUR, TO THE QUEEN. + +18. THE LOVER'S TALE, and other Poems. + +19. RIZPAH, and other Poems. + +20. THE VOYAGE OF MAELDUNE, and other Poems. + +21. THE SPINSTER'S SWEET-ARTS, and other Poems. + +22. DEMETER, and other Poems. + +23. THE DEATH OF OENONE, and other Poems. + + +MACMILLAN AND CO., LTD., LONDON. + + * * * * * + +THE WORKS OF LORD TENNYSON. + + +POETICAL WORKS. Pocket Edition, Morocco binding, gilt edges. Pott 8vo. +7s. 6d. net. + +POETICAL WORKS. School Edition. In Four Parts. Crown 8vo. 2s. 6d. +each. + +THE DRAMATIC WORKS. Miniature Edition. Five Vols. 16mo. In a box. 12s. +6d. + + +THE ORIGINAL EDITIONS. Fcap. 8vo. + +THE HOLY GRAIL, and other Poems. 4s. 6d. + +BALLADS, and other Poems. 5s. + +HAROLD: a Drama. 6s. + +QUEEN MARY: a Drama. 6s. + +THE CUP AND THE FALCON. 5s. + +BECKET. 6s. + +TIRESIAS, and other Poems. 6s. + +LOCKSLEY HALL SIXTY YEARS AFTER, etc. 6s. + +DEMETER, and other Poems. 6s. + +THE FORESTERS: ROBIN HOOD and MAID MARIAN. 6s. + +THE DEATH OF OENONE, AKBAR'S DREAM, and other Poems. 6s. + +POEMS BY TWO BROTHERS. Second Edition. + + +THE ROYAL EDITION. 8vo. 16s. + + * * * * * + +GOLDEN TREASURY SERIES. + +Pott 8vo. 2s. 6d. net. Also Cloth elegant, gilt top, 2s. 6d. net; Limp +leather, gilt edges, 3s. 6d. net. (Except the _Lyrical Poems_.) + + +LYRICAL POEMS BY ALFRED, LORD TENNYSON. Selected by FRANCIS T. PALGRAVE. +Large Paper Edition. 8vo. 9s. + +IN MEMORIAM. Large Paper Edition. 8vo. 9s + +THE PRINCESS. + +IDYLLS OF THE KING. + +IDYLLS OF THE KING. (VIVIEN, ELAINE, ENID, GUINEVERE.) Illustrated and +Decorated by G.W. and L. RHEAD. Royal 4to. 15s. net. + +POEMS, including IN MEMORIAM, THE PRINCESS, etc. Illustrated. 8vo. Gilt +edges. 2s. + +IN MEMORIAM. With Notes by the Author. Edited by HALLAM, LORD TENNYSON. +Fcap. 8vo. 5s. net. + +POEMS, including IN MEMORIAM, etc. Medium 8vo, sewed. 6d. + +MAUD, THE PRINCESS, ENOCH ARDEN, and other Poems. Medium 8vo, sewed. 6d. + +TENNYSON FOR THE YOUNG. With Notes by ALFRED AINGER, M.A. Pott 8vo. 1s. +net. + +SONGS FROM TENNYSON'S WRITINGS. Square 8vo. 2s. 6d. + +THE TENNYSON BIRTHDAY BOOK. Edited by EMILY SHAKESPEAR. Extra Crown +16mo. 2s. 6d. + +THE BROOK. Illustrated by A. WOODRUFF. Oblong demy 16mo. 2s. 6d. + +BECKET: a Tragedy. As arranged for the stage by HENRY IRVING. 8vo, +sewed, 1s. net. + + +MACMILLAN AND CO., LTD., LONDON. + + * * * * * + +THE WORKS OF J.H. SHORTHOUSE + +Uniform Edition. Crown 8vo. 3s. 6d. each. + + +JOHN INGLESANT: a Romance. + +THE LITTLE SCHOOLMASTER MARK. + +SIR PERCIVAL. + +A TEACHER OF THE VIOLIN, and other Tales + +BLANCHE, LADY FALAISE. + +THE COUNTESS EVE. + + +Edition de Luxe. + +JOHN INGLESANT. Three Vols. 8vo. 25s. net. + + +Pocket Edition. Fcap. 8vo. + +JOHN INGLESANT. Cloth extra, gilt top. 2s. net. + +Limp leather, gilt top. 3s. net. + + * * * * * + +LIFE, LETTERS, AND LITERARY REMAINS OF J.H. SHORTHOUSE. Edited by his +WIFE. Two vols. 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