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| author | Roger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org> | 2025-10-15 05:17:52 -0700 |
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| committer | Roger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org> | 2025-10-15 05:17:52 -0700 |
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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/1863-0.txt b/1863-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..121ba5d --- /dev/null +++ b/1863-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,6070 @@ +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 1863 *** +NOTES ON A JOURNEY FROM CORNHILL TO GRAND CAIRO + +By William Makepeace Thackeray + + + + +Contents + + DEDICATION + PREFACE + CHAPTER I: VIGO + CHAPTER II: LISBON—CADIZ + CHAPTER III: THE “LADY MARY WOOD” + CHAPTER IV: GIBRALTAR + CHAPTER V: ATHENS + CHAPTER VI: SMYRNA—FIRST GLIMPSES OF THE EAST + CHAPTER VII: CONSTANTINOPLE + CHAPTER VIII: RHODES + CHAPTER IX: THE WHITE SQUALL + CHAPTER X: TELMESSUS—BEYROUT + CHAPTER XI: A DAY AND NIGHT IN SYRIA + CHAPTER XII: FROM JAFFA TO JERUSALEM + CHAPTER XIII: JERUSALEM + CHAPTER XIV: FROM JAFFA TO ALEXANDRIA + CHAPTER XV: TO CAIRO + Footnotes: + + + + +DEDICATION + + +TO CAPTAIN SAMUEL LEWIS, OF THE PENINSULAR AND ORIENTAL STEAM +NAVIGATION COMPANY’S SERVICE. + +My Dear Lewis, + +After a voyage, during which the captain of the ship has displayed +uncommon courage, seamanship, affability, or other good qualities, +grateful passengers often present him with a token of their esteem, in +the shape of teapots, tankards, trays, &c. of precious metal. Among +authors, however, bullion is a much rarer commodity than paper, whereof +I beg you to accept a little in the shape of this small volume. It +contains a few notes of a voyage which your skill and kindness rendered +doubly pleasant; and of which I don’t think there is any recollection +more agreeable than that it was the occasion of making your friendship. + +If the noble Company in whose service you command (and whose fleet +alone makes them a third-rate maritime power in Europe) should appoint +a few admirals in their navy, I hope to hear that your flag is hoisted +on board one of the grandest of their steamers. But, I trust, even +there you will not forget the “Iberia,” and the delightful +Mediterranean cruise we had in her in the Autumn of 1844. + +Most faithfully yours, My dear Lewis, W. M. THACKERAY. LONDON: December +24, 1845. + + + + +PREFACE + + +On the 20th of August, 1844, the writer of this little book went to +dine at the—Club, quite unconscious of the wonderful events which Fate +had in store for him. + +Mr. William was there, giving a farewell dinner to his friend Mr. James +(now Sir James). These two asked Mr. Titmarsh to join company with +them, and the conversation naturally fell upon the tour Mr. James was +about to take. The Peninsular and Oriental Company had arranged an +excursion in the Mediterranean, by which, in the space of a couple of +months, as many men and cities were to be seen as Ulysses surveyed and +noted in ten years. Malta, Athens, Smyrna, Constantinople, Jerusalem, +Cairo were to be visited, and everybody was to be back in London by +Lord Mayor’s Day. + +The idea of beholding these famous places inflamed Mr. Titmarsh’s mind; +and the charms of such a journey were eloquently impressed upon him by +Mr. James. “Come,” said that kind and hospitable gentleman, “and make +one of my family party; in all your life you will never probably have a +chance again to see so much in so short a time. Consider—it is as easy +as a journey to Paris or to Baden.” Mr. Titmarsh considered all these +things; but also the difficulties of the situation: he had but +six-and-thirty hours to get ready for so portentous a journey—he had +engagements at home— finally, could he afford it? In spite of these +objections, however, with every glass of claret the enthusiasm somehow +rose, and the difficulties vanished. + +But when Mr. James, to crown all, said he had no doubt that his +friends, the Directors of the Peninsular and Oriental Company, would +make Mr. Titmarsh the present of a berth for the voyage, all objections +ceased on his part: to break his outstanding engagements—to write +letters to his amazed family, stating that they were not to expect him +at dinner on Saturday fortnight, as he would be at Jerusalem on that +day—to purchase eighteen shirts and lay in a sea stock of Russia +ducks,—was the work of four-and- twenty hours; and on the 22nd of +August, the “Lady Mary Wood” was sailing from Southampton with the +“subject of the present memoir,” quite astonished to find himself one +of the passengers on board. + +These important statements are made partly to convince some incredulous +friends—who insist still that the writer never went abroad at all, and +wrote the following pages, out of pure fancy, in retirement at Putney; +but mainly, to give him an opportunity of thanking the Directors of the +Company in question for a delightful excursion. + +It was one so easy, so charming, and I think profitable—it leaves such +a store of pleasant recollections for after days—and creates so many +new sources of interest (a newspaper letter from Beyrout, or Malta, or +Algiers, has twice the interest now that it had formerly),—that I can’t +but recommend all persons who have time and means to make a similar +journey—vacation idlers to extend their travels and pursue it: above +all, young well-educated men entering life, to take this course, we +will say, after that at college; and, having their book-learning fresh +in their minds, see the living people and their cities, and the actual +aspect of Nature, along the famous shores of the Mediterranean. + + + + +CHAPTER I +VIGO + + +The sun brought all the sick people out of their berths this morning, +and the indescribable moans and noises which had been issuing from +behind the fine painted doors on each side of the cabin happily ceased. +Long before sunrise, I had the good fortune to discover that it was no +longer necessary to maintain the horizontal posture, and, the very +instant this truth was apparent, came on deck, at two o’clock in the +morning, to see a noble full moon sinking westward, and millions of the +most brilliant stars shining overhead. The night was so serenely pure, +that you saw them in magnificent airy perspective; the blue sky around +and over them, and other more distant orbs sparkling above, till they +glittered away faintly into the immeasurable distance. The ship went +rolling over a heavy, sweltering, calm sea. The breeze was a warm and +soft one; quite different to the rigid air we had left behind us, two +days since, off the Isle of Wight. The bell kept tolling its +half-hours, and the mate explained the mystery of watch and dog-watch. + +The sight of that noble scene cured all the woes and discomfitures of +sea-sickness at once, and if there were any need to communicate such +secrets to the public, one might tell of much more good that the +pleasant morning-watch effected; but there are a set of emotions about +which a man had best be shy of talking lightly,—and the feelings +excited by contemplating this vast, magnificent, harmonious Nature are +among these. The view of it inspires a delight and ecstasy which is not +only hard to describe, but which has something secret in it that a man +should not utter loudly. Hope, memory, humility, tender yearnings +towards dear friends, and inexpressible love and reverence towards the +Power which created the infinite universe blazing above eternally, and +the vast ocean shining and rolling around—fill the heart with a solemn +humble happiness, that a person dwelling in a city has rarely occasion +to enjoy. They are coming away from London parties at this time: the +dear little eyes are closed in sleep under mother’s wing. How far off +city cares and pleasures appear to be! how small and mean they seem, +dwindling out of sight before this magnificent brightness of Nature! +But the best thoughts only grow and strengthen under it. Heaven shines +above, and the humble spirit looks up reverently towards that boundless +aspect of wisdom and beauty. You are at home, and with all at rest +there, however far away they may be; and through the distance the heart +broods over them, bright and wakeful like yonder peaceful stars +overhead. + +The day was as fine and calm as the night; at seven bells, suddenly a +bell began to toll very much like that of a country church, and on +going on deck we found an awning raised, a desk with a flag flung over +it close to the compass, and the ship’s company and passengers +assembled there to hear the Captain read the Service in a manly +respectful voice. This, too, was a novel and touching sight to me. +Peaked ridges of purple mountains rose to the left of the +ship,—Finisterre and the coast of Galicia. The sky above was cloudless +and shining; the vast dark ocean smiled peacefully round about, and the +ship went rolling over it, as the people within were praising the Maker +of all. + +In honour of the day, it was announced that the passengers would be +regaled with champagne at dinner; and accordingly that exhilarating +liquor was served out in decent profusion, the company drinking the +Captain’s health with the customary orations of compliment and +acknowledgment. This feast was scarcely ended, when we found ourselves +rounding the headland into Vigo Bay, passing a grim and tall island of +rocky mountains which lies in the centre of the bay. + +Whether it is that the sight of land is always welcome to weary +mariners, after the perils and annoyances of a voyage of three days, or +whether the place is in itself extraordinarily beautiful, need not be +argued; but I have seldom seen anything more charming than the +amphitheatre of noble hills into which the ship now came— all the +features of the landscape being lighted up with a wonderful clearness +of air, which rarely adorns a view in our country. The sun had not yet +set, but over the town and lofty rocky castle of Vigo a great ghost of +a moon was faintly visible, which blazed out brighter and brighter as +the superior luminary retired behind the purple mountains of the +headland to rest. Before the general background of waving heights which +encompassed the bay, rose a second semicircle of undulating hills, as +cheerful and green as the mountains behind them were grey and solemn. +Farms and gardens, convent towers, white villages and churches, and +buildings that no doubt were hermitages once, upon the sharp peaks of +the hills, shone brightly in the sun. The sight was delightfully +cheerful, animated, and pleasing. + +Presently the Captain roared out the magic words, “Stop her!” and the +obedient vessel came to a stand-still, at some three hundred yards from +the little town, with its white houses clambering up a rock, defended +by the superior mountain whereon the castle stands. Numbers of people, +arrayed in various brilliant colours of red, were standing on the sand +close by the tumbling, shining, purple waves: and there we beheld, for +the first time, the Royal red and yellow standard of Spain floating on +its own ground, under the guardianship of a light blue sentinel, whose +musket glittered in the sun. Numerous boats were seen, incontinently, +to put off from the little shore. + +And now our attention was withdrawn from the land to a sight of great +splendour on board. This was Lieutenant Bundy, the guardian of Her +Majesty’s mails, who issued from his cabin in his long swallow-tailed +coat with anchor buttons; his sabre clattering between his legs; a +magnificent shirt-collar, of several inches in height, rising round his +good-humoured sallow face; and above it a cocked hat, that shone so, I +thought it was made of polished tin (it may have been that or oilskin), +handsomely laced with black worsted, and ornamented with a shining gold +cord. A little squat boat, rowed by three ragged gallegos, came +bouncing up to the ship. Into this Mr. Bundy and Her Majesty’s Royal +mail embarked with much majesty; and in the twinkling of an eye, the +Royal standard of England, about the size of a pocket-handkerchief,—and +at the bows of the boat, the man-of-war’s pennant, being a strip of +bunting considerably under the value of a farthing,—streamed out. + +“They know that flag, sir,” said the good-natured old tar, quite +solemnly, in the evening afterwards: “they respect it, sir.” The +authority of Her Majesty’s lieutenant on board the steamer is stated to +be so tremendous, that he may order it to stop, to move, to go +larboard, starboard, or what you will; and the captain dare only +disobey him suo periculo. + +It was agreed that a party of us should land for half-an-hour, and +taste real Spanish chocolate on Spanish ground. We followed Lieutenant +Bundy, but humbly in the providor’s boat; that officer going on shore +to purchase fresh eggs, milk for tea (in place of the slimy substitute +of whipped yolk of egg which we had been using for our morning and +evening meals), and, if possible, oysters, for which it is said the +rocks of Vigo are famous. + +It was low tide, and the boat could not get up to the dry shore. Hence +it was necessary to take advantage of the offers of sundry gallegos, +who rushed barelegged into the water, to land on their shoulders. The +approved method seems to be, to sit upon one shoulder only, holding on +by the porter’s whiskers; and though some of our party were of the +tallest and fattest men whereof our race is composed, and their living +sedans exceedingly meagre and small, yet all were landed without +accident upon the juicy sand, and forthwith surrounded by a host of +mendicants, screaming, “I say, sir! penny, sir! I say, English! tam +your ays! penny!” in all voices, from extreme youth to the most lousy +and venerable old age. When it is said that these beggars were as +ragged as those of Ireland, and still more voluble, the Irish traveller +will be able to form an opinion of their capabilities. + +Through this crowd we passed up some steep rocky steps, through a +little low gate, where, in a little guard-house and barrack, a few +dirty little sentinels were keeping a dirty little guard; and by +low-roofed whitewashed houses, with balconies, and women in them,— the +very same women, with the very same head-clothes, and yellow fans and +eyes, at once sly and solemn, which Murillo painted,—by a neat church +into which we took a peep, and, finally, into the Plaza del +Constitucion, or grand place of the town, which may be about as big as +that pleasing square, Pump Court, Temple. We were taken to an inn, of +which I forget the name, and were shown from one chamber and storey to +another, till we arrived at that apartment where the real Spanish +chocolate was finally to be served out. All these rooms were as clean +as scrubbing and whitewash could make them; with simple French prints +(with Spanish titles) on the walls; a few rickety half-finished +articles of furniture; and, finally, an air of extremely respectable +poverty. A jolly, black-eyed, yellow- shawled Dulcinea conducted us +through the apartment, and provided us with the desired refreshment. + +Sounds of clarions drew our eyes to the Place of the Constitution; and, +indeed, I had forgotten to say, that that majestic square was filled +with military, with exceedingly small firelocks, the men ludicrously +young and diminutive for the most part, in a uniform at once cheap and +tawdry,—like those supplied to the warriors at Astley’s, or from still +humbler theatrical wardrobes: indeed, the whole scene was just like +that of a little theatre; the houses curiously small, with arcades and +balconies, out of which looked women apparently a great deal too big +for the chambers they inhabited; the warriors were in ginghams, +cottons, and tinsel; the officers had huge epaulets of sham silver lace +drooping over their bosoms, and looked as if they were attired at a +very small expense. Only the general—the captain-general (Pooch, they +told us, was his name: I know not how ’tis written in Spanish)—was well +got up, with a smart hat, a real feather, huge stars glittering on his +portly chest, and tights and boots of the first order. Presently, after +a good deal of trumpeting, the little men marched off the place, Pooch +and his staff coming into the very inn in which we were awaiting our +chocolate. + +Then we had an opportunity of seeing some of the civilians of the town. +Three or four ladies passed, with fan and mantle; to them came three or +four dandies, dressed smartly in the French fashion, with strong Jewish +physiognomies. There was one, a solemn lean fellow in black, with his +collars extremely turned over, and holding before him a long +ivory-tipped ebony cane, who tripped along the little place with a +solemn smirk, which gave one an indescribable feeling of the truth of +“Gil Blas,” and of those delightful bachelors and licentiates who have +appeared to us all in our dreams. + +In fact we were but half-an-hour in this little queer Spanish town; and +it appeared like a dream, too, or a little show got up to amuse us. +Boom! the gun fired at the end of the funny little entertainment. The +women and the balconies, the beggars and the walking Murillos, Pooch +and the little soldiers in tinsel, disappeared, and were shut up in +their box again. Once more we were carried on the beggars’ shoulders +out off the shore, and we found ourselves again in the great stalwart +roast-beef world; the stout British steamer bearing out of the bay, +whose purple waters had grown more purple. The sun had set by this +time, and the moon above was twice as big and bright as our degenerate +moons are. + +The providor had already returned with his fresh stores, and Bundy’s +tin hat was popped into its case, and he walking the deck of the packet +denuded of tails. As we went out of the bay, occurred a little incident +with which the great incidents of the day may be said to wind up. We +saw before us a little vessel, tumbling and plunging about in the dark +waters of the bay, with a bright light beaming from the mast. It made +for us at about a couple of miles from the town, and came close up, +flouncing and bobbing in the very jaws of the paddle, which looked as +if it would have seized and twirled round that little boat and its +light, and destroyed them for ever and ever. All the passengers, of +course, came crowding to the ship’s side to look at the bold little +boat. + +“I SAY!” howled a man; “I say!—a word!—I say! Pasagero! Pasagero! +Pasage-e-ero!” We were two hundred yards ahead by this time. + +“Go on,” says the captain. + +“You may stop if you like,” says Lieutenant Bundy, exerting his +tremendous responsibility. It is evident that the lieutenant has a soft +heart, and felt for the poor devil in the boat who was howling so +piteously “Pasagero!” + +But the captain was resolute. His duty was NOT to take the man up. He +was evidently an irregular customer—someone trying to escape, possibly. + +The lieutenant turned away, but did not make any further hints. The +captain was right; but we all felt somehow disappointed, and looked +back wistfully at the little boat, jumping up and down far astern now; +the poor little light shining in vain, and the poor wretch within +screaming out in the most heartrending accents a last faint desperate +“I say! Pasagero-o!” + +We all went down to tea rather melancholy; but the new milk, in the +place of that abominable whipped egg, revived us again; and so ended +the great events on board the “Lady Mary Wood” steamer, on the 25th +August, 1844. + + + + +CHAPTER II +LISBON—CADIZ + + +A great misfortune which befalls a man who has but a single day to stay +in a town, is that fatal duty which superstition entails upon him of +visiting the chief lions of the city in which he may happen to be. You +must go through the ceremony, however much you may sigh to avoid it; +and however much you know that the lions in one capital roar very much +like the lions in another; that the churches are more or less large and +splendid, the palaces pretty spacious, all the world over; and that +there is scarcely a capital city in this Europe but has its pompous +bronze statue or two of some periwigged, hook-nosed emperor, in a Roman +habit, waving his bronze baton on his broad-flanked brazen charger. We +only saw these state old lions in Lisbon, whose roar has long since +ceased to frighten one. First we went to the Church of St. Roch, to see +a famous piece of mosaic-work there. It is a famous work of art, and +was bought by I don’t know what king for I don’t know how much money. +All this information may be perfectly relied on, though the fact is, we +did not see the mosaic-work: the sacristan, who guards it, was yet in +bed; and it was veiled from our eyes in a side-chapel by great dirty +damask curtains, which could not be removed, except when the +sacristan’s toilette was done, and at the price of a dollar. So we were +spared this mosaic exhibition; and I think I always feel relieved when +such an event occurs. I feel I have done my duty in coming to see the +enormous animal: if he is not at home, virtute mea me, &c.—we have done +our best, and mortal can do no more. + +In order to reach that church of the forbidden mosaic, we had sweated +up several most steep and dusty streets—hot and dusty, although it was +but nine o’clock in the morning. Thence the guide conducted us into +some little dust-powdered gardens, in which the people make believe to +enjoy the verdure, and whence you look over a great part of the arid, +dreary, stony city. There was no smoke, as in honest London, only +dust—dust over the gaunt houses and the dismal yellow strips of +gardens. Many churches were there, and tall half-baked-looking public +edifices, that had a dry, uncomfortable, earth-quaky look, to my idea. +The ground-floors of the spacious houses by which we passed seemed the +coolest and pleasantest portions of the mansion. They were cellars or +warehouses, for the most part, in which white-jacketed clerks sat +smoking easy cigars. The streets were plastered with placards of a +bull-fight, to take place the next evening (there was no opera that +season); but it was not a real Spanish tauromachy—only a theatrical +combat, as you could see by the picture in which the horseman was +cantering off at three miles an hour, the bull tripping after him with +tips to his gentle horns. Mules interminable, and almost all +excellently sleek and handsome, were pacing down every street: here and +there, but later in the day, came clattering along a smart rider on a +prancing Spanish horse; and in the afternoon a few families might be +seen in the queerest old-fashioned little carriages, drawn by their +jolly mules and swinging between, or rather before, enormous wheels. + +The churches I saw were of the florid periwig architecture—I mean of +that pompous cauliflower kind of ornament which was the fashion in +Louis the Fifteenth’s time, at which unlucky period a building mania +seems to have seized upon many of the monarchs of Europe, and +innumerable public edifices were erected. It seems to me to have been +the period in all history when society was the least natural, and +perhaps the most dissolute; and I have always fancied that the bloated +artificial forms of the architecture partake of the social +disorganisation of the time. Who can respect a simpering ninny, +grinning in a Roman dress and a full-bottomed wig, who is made to pass +off for a hero? or a fat woman in a hoop, and of a most doubtful +virtue, who leers at you as a goddess? In the palaces which we saw, +several Court allegories were represented, which, atrocious as they +were in point of art, might yet serve to attract the regard of the +moraliser. There were Faith, Hope, and Charity restoring Don John to +the arms of his happy Portugal: there were Virtue, Valour, and Victory +saluting Don Emanuel: Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic (for what I +know, or some mythologic nymphs) dancing before Don Miguel—the picture +is there still, at the Ajuda; and ah me! where is poor Mig? Well, it is +these State lies and ceremonies that we persist in going to see; +whereas a man would have a much better insight into Portuguese manners, +by planting himself at a corner, like yonder beggar, and watching the +real transactions of the day. + +A drive to Belem is the regular route practised by the traveller who +has to make only a short stay, and accordingly a couple of carriages +were provided for our party, and we were driven through the long merry +street of Belem, peopled by endless strings of mules,—by thousands of +gallegos, with water-barrels on their shoulders, or lounging by the +fountains to hire,—by the Lisbon and Belem omnibuses, with four mules, +jingling along at a good pace; and it seemed to me to present a far +more lively and cheerful, though not so regular, an appearance as the +stately quarters of the city we had left behind us. The little shops +were at full work— the men brown, well-dressed, manly, and handsome: so +much cannot, I am sorry to say, be said for the ladies, of whom, with +every anxiety to do so, our party could not perceive a single good- +looking specimen all day. The noble blue Tagus accompanies you all +along these three miles of busy pleasant street, whereof the chief +charm, as I thought, was its look of genuine business—that appearance +of comfort which the cleverest Court-architect never knows how to give. + +The carriages (the canvas one with four seats and the chaise in which I +drove) were brought suddenly up to a gate with the Royal arms over it; +and here we were introduced to as queer an exhibition as the eye has +often looked on. This was the state-carriage house, where there is a +museum of huge old tumble-down gilded coaches of the last century, +lying here, mouldy and dark, in a sort of limbo. The gold has vanished +from the great lumbering old wheels and panels; the velvets are wofully +tarnished. When one thinks of the patches and powder that have simpered +out of those plate-glass windows—the mitred bishops, the big-wigged +marshals, the shovel- hatted abbes which they have borne in their +time—the human mind becomes affected in no ordinary degree. Some human +minds heave a sigh for the glories of bygone days; while others, +considering rather the lies and humbug, the vice and servility, which +went framed and glazed and enshrined, creaking along in those old +Juggernaut cars, with fools worshipping under the wheels, console +themselves for the decay of institutions that may have been splendid +and costly, but were ponderous, clumsy, slow, and unfit for daily wear. +The guardian of these defunct old carriages tells some prodigious fibs +concerning them: he pointed out one carriage that was six hundred years +old in his calendar; but any connoisseur in bric-a-brac can see it was +built at Paris in the Regent Orleans’ time. + +Hence it is but a step to an institution in full life and vigour,— a +noble orphan-school for one thousand boys and girls, founded by Don +Pedro, who gave up to its use the superb convent of Belem, with its +splendid cloisters, vast airy dormitories, and magnificent church. Some +Oxford gentlemen would have wept to see the desecrated edifice,—to +think that the shaven polls and white gowns were banished from it to +give place to a thousand children, who have not even the clergy to +instruct them. “Every lad here may choose his trade,” our little +informant said, who addressed us in better French than any of our party +spoke, whose manners were perfectly gentlemanlike and respectful, and +whose clothes, though of a common cotton stuff, were cut and worn with +a military neatness and precision. All the children whom we remarked +were dressed with similar neatness, and it was a pleasure to go through +their various rooms for study, where some were busy at mathematics, +some at drawing, some attending a lecture on tailoring, while others +were sitting at the feet of a professor of the science of shoemaking. +All the garments of the establishment were made by the pupils; even the +deaf and dumb were drawing and reading, and the blind were, for the +most part, set to perform on musical instruments, and got up a concert +for the visitors. It was then we wished ourselves of the numbers of the +deaf and dumb, for the poor fellows made noises so horrible, that even +as blind beggars they could hardly get a livelihood in the musical way. + +Hence we were driven to the huge palace of Necessidades, which is but a +wing of a building that no King of Portugal ought ever to be rich +enough to complete, and which, if perfect, might outvie the Tower of +Babel. The mines of Brazil must have been productive of gold and silver +indeed when the founder imagined this enormous edifice. From the +elevation on which it stands it commands the noblest views,—the city is +spread before it, with its many churches and towers, and for many miles +you see the magnificent Tagus, rolling by banks crowned with trees and +towers. But to arrive at this enormous building you have to climb a +steep suburb of wretched huts, many of them with dismal gardens of dry +cracked earth, where a few reedy sprouts of Indian corn seemed to be +the chief cultivation, and which were guarded by huge plants of spiky +aloes, on which the rags of the proprietors of the huts were sunning +themselves. The terrace before the palace was similarly encroached upon +by these wretched habitations. A few millions judiciously expended +might make of this arid hill one of the most magnificent gardens in the +world; and the palace seems to me to excel for situation any Royal +edifice I have ever seen. But the huts of these swarming poor have +crawled up close to its gates,— the superb walls of hewn stone stop all +of a sudden with a lath- and-plaster hitch; and capitals, and hewn +stones for columns, still lying about on the deserted terrace, may lie +there for ages to come, probably, and never take their places by the +side of their brethren in yonder tall bankrupt galleries. The air of +this pure sky has little effect upon the edifices,—the edges of the +stone look as sharp as if the builders had just left their work; and +close to the grand entrance stands an outbuilding, part of which may +have been burnt fifty years ago, but is in such cheerful preservation +that you might fancy the fire had occurred yesterday. It must have been +an awful sight from this hill to have looked at the city spread before +it, and seen it reeling and swaying in the time of the earthquake. I +thought it looked so hot and shaky, that one might fancy a return of +the fit. In several places still remain gaps and chasms, and ruins lie +here and there as they cracked and fell. + +Although the palace has not attained anything like its full growth, yet +what exists is quite big enough for the monarch of such a little +country; and Versailles or Windsor has not apartments more nobly +proportioned. The Queen resides in the Ajuda, a building of much less +pretensions, of which the yellow walls and beautiful gardens are seen +between Belem and the city. The Necessidades are only used for grand +galas, receptions of ambassadors, and ceremonies of state. In the +throne-room is a huge throne, surmounted by an enormous gilt crown, +than which I have never seen anything larger in the finest pantomime at +Drury Lane; but the effect of this splendid piece is lessened by a +shabby old Brussels carpet, almost the only other article of furniture +in the apartment, and not quite large enough to cover its spacious +floor. The looms of Kidderminster have supplied the web which ornaments +the “Ambassadors’ Waiting-Room,” and the ceilings are painted with huge +allegories in distemper, which pretty well correspond with the other +furniture. Of all the undignified objects in the world, a palace out at +elbows is surely the meanest. Such places ought not to be seen in +adversity,—splendour is their decency,—and when no longer able to +maintain it, they should sink to the level of their means, calmly +subside into manufactories, or go shabby in seclusion. + +There is a picture-gallery belonging to the palace that is quite of a +piece with the furniture, where are the mythological pieces relative to +the kings before alluded to, and where the English visitor will see +some astonishing pictures of the Duke of Wellington, done in a very +characteristic style of Portuguese art. There is also a chapel, which +has been decorated with much care and sumptuousness of ornament—the +altar surmounted by a ghastly and horrible carved figure in the taste +of the time when faith was strengthened by the shrieks of Jews on the +rack, and enlivened by the roasting of heretics. Other such frightful +images may be seen in the churches of the city; those which we saw were +still rich, tawdry, and splendid to outward show, although the French, +as usual, had robbed their shrines of their gold and silver, and the +statues of their jewels and crowns. But brass and tinsel look to the +visitor full as well at a little distance,—as doubtless Soult and Junot +thought, when they despoiled these places of worship, like French +philosophers as they were. + +A friend, with a classical turn of mind, was bent upon seeing the +aqueduct, whither we went on a dismal excursion of three hours, in the +worst carriages, over the most diabolical clattering roads, up and down +dreary parched hills, on which grew a few grey olive-trees and many +aloes. When we arrived, the gate leading to the aqueduct was closed, +and we were entertained with a legend of some respectable character who +had made a good livelihood there for some time past lately, having a +private key to this very aqueduct, and lying in wait there for unwary +travellers like ourselves, whom he pitched down the arches into the +ravines below, and there robbed them at leisure. So that all we saw was +the door and the tall arches of the aqueduct, and by the time we +returned to town it was time to go on board the ship again. If the inn +at which we had sojourned was not of the best quality, the bill, at +least, would have done honour to the first establishment in London. We +all left the house of entertainment joyfully, glad to get out of the +sun- burnt city and go HOME. Yonder in the steamer was home, with its +black funnel and gilt portraiture of “Lady Mary Wood” at the bows; and +every soul on board felt glad to return to the friendly little vessel. +But the authorities of Lisbon, however, are very suspicious of the +departing stranger, and we were made to lie an hour in the river before +the Sanita boat, where a passport is necessary to be procured before +the traveller can quit the country. Boat after boat laden with priests +and peasantry, with handsome red-sashed gallegos clad in brown, and +ill-favoured women, came and got their permits, and were off, as we lay +bumping up against the old hull of the Sanita boat; but the officers +seemed to take a delight in keeping us there bumping, looked at us +quite calmly over the ship’s sides, and smoked their cigars without the +least attention to the prayers which we shrieked out for release. + +If we were glad to get away from Lisbon, we were quite as sorry to be +obliged to quit Cadiz, which we reached the next night, and where we +were allowed a couple of hours’ leave to land and look about. It seemed +as handsome within as it is stately without; the long narrow streets of +an admirable cleanliness, many of the tall houses of rich and noble +decorations, and all looking as if the city were in full prosperity. I +have seen no more cheerful and animated sight than the long street +leading from the quay where we were landed, and the market blazing in +sunshine, piled with fruit, fish, and poultry, under many-coloured +awnings; the tall white houses with their balconies and galleries +shining round about, and the sky above so blue that the best cobalt in +all the paint-box looks muddy and dim in comparison to it. There were +pictures for a year in that market-place—from the copper-coloured old +hags and beggars who roared to you for the love of Heaven to give +money, to the swaggering dandies of the market, with red sashes and +tight clothes, looking on superbly, with a hand on the hip and a cigar +in the mouth. These must be the chief critics at the great bull-fight +house yonder by the Alameda, with its scanty trees, and cool breezes +facing the water. Nor are there any corks to the bulls’ horns here, as +at Lisbon. A small old English guide who seized upon me the moment my +foot was on shore, had a store of agreeable legends regarding the +bulls, men, and horses that had been killed with unbounded profusion in +the late entertainments which have taken place. + +It was so early an hour in the morning that the shops were scarcely +opened as yet; the churches, however, stood open for the faithful, and +we met scores of women tripping towards them with pretty feet, and +smart black mantillas, from which looked out fine dark eyes and +handsome pale faces, very different from the coarse brown countenances +we had seen at Lisbon. A very handsome modern cathedral, built by the +present bishop at his own charges, was the finest of the public +edifices we saw; it was not, however, nearly so much frequented as +another little church, crowded with altars and fantastic ornaments, and +lights and gilding, where we were told to look behind a huge iron +grille, and beheld a bevy of black nuns kneeling. Most of the good +ladies in the front ranks stopped their devotions, and looked at the +strangers with as much curiosity as we directed at them through the +gloomy bars of their chapel. The men’s convents are closed; that which +contains the famous Murillos has been turned into an academy of the +fine arts; but the English guide did not think the pictures were of +sufficient interest to detain strangers, and so hurried us back to the +shore, and grumbled at only getting three shillings at parting for his +trouble and his information. And so our residence in Andalusia began +and ended before breakfast, and we went on board and steamed for +Gibraltar, looking, as we passed, at Joinville’s black squadron, and +the white houses of St. Mary’s across the bay, with the hills of Medina +Sidonia and Granada lying purple beyond them. There’s something even in +those names which is pleasant to write down; to have passed only two +hours in Cadiz is something—to have seen real donnas with comb and +mantle—real caballeros with cloak and cigar—real Spanish barbers +lathering out of brass basins—and to have heard guitars under the +balconies: there was one that an old beggar was jangling in the market, +whilst a huge leering fellow in bushy whiskers and a faded velvet dress +came singing and jumping after our party,—not singing to a guitar, it +is true, but imitating one capitally with his voice, and cracking his +fingers by way of castanets, and performing a dance such as Figaro or +Lablache might envy. How clear that fellow’s voice thrums on the ear +even now; and how bright and pleasant remains the recollection of the +fine city and the blue sea, and the Spanish flags floating on the boats +that danced over it, and Joinville’s band beginning to play stirring +marches as we puffed out of the bay. + +The next stage was Gibraltar, where we were to change horses. Before +sunset we skirted along the dark savage mountains of the African coast, +and came to the Rock just before gun-fire. It is the very image of an +enormous lion, crouched between the Atlantic and the Mediterranean, and +set there to guard the passage for its British mistress. The next +British lion is Malta, four days further on in the Midland Sea, and +ready to spring upon Egypt or pounce upon Syria, or roar so as to be +heard at Marseilles in case of need. + +To the eyes of the civilian the first-named of these famous +fortifications is by far the most imposing. The Rock looks so +tremendous, that to ascend it, even without the compliment of shells or +shot, seems a dreadful task—what would it be when all those mysterious +lines of batteries were vomiting fire and brimstone; when all those +dark guns that you see poking their grim heads out of every imaginable +cleft and zigzag should salute you with shot, both hot and cold; and +when, after tugging up the hideous perpendicular place, you were to +find regiments of British grenadiers ready to plunge bayonets into your +poor panting stomach, and let out artificially the little breath left +there? It is a marvel to think that soldiers will mount such places for +a shilling—ensigns for five and ninepence—a day: a cabman would ask +double the money to go half way! One meekly reflects upon the above +strange truths, leaning over the ship’s side, and looking up the huge +mountain, from the tower nestled at the foot of it to the thin +flagstaff at the summit, up to which have been piled the most ingenious +edifices for murder Christian science ever adopted. My hobby-horse is a +quiet beast, suited for Park riding, or a gentle trot to Putney and +back to a snug stable, and plenty of feeds of corn:- it can’t abide +climbing hills, and is not at all used to gunpowder. Some men’s animals +are so spirited that the very appearance of a stone-wall sets them +jumping at it: regular chargers of hobbies, which snort and say “Ha, +ha!” at the mere notion of a battle. + + + + +CHAPTER III +THE “LADY MARY WOOD” + + +Our week’s voyage is now drawing to a close. We have just been to look +at Cape Trafalgar, shining white over the finest blue sea. (We, who +were looking at Trafalgar Square only the other day!) The sight of that +cape must have disgusted Joinville and his fleet of steamers, as they +passed yesterday into Cadiz bay, and to-morrow will give them a sight +of St. Vincent. + +One of their steam-vessels has been lost off the coast of Africa; they +were obliged to burn her, lest the Moors should take possession of her. +She was a virgin vessel, just out of Brest. Poor innocent! to die in +the very first month of her union with the noble whiskered god of war! + +We Britons on board the English boat received the news of the +“Groenenland’s” abrupt demise with grins of satisfaction. It was a sort +of national compliment, and cause of agreeable congratulation. “The +lubbers!” we said; “the clumsy humbugs! there’s none but Britons to +rule the waves!” and we gave ourselves piratical airs, and went down +presently and were sick in our little buggy berths. It was pleasant, +certainly, to laugh at Joinville’s admiral’s flag floating at his +foremast, in yonder black ship, with its two thundering great guns at +the bows and stern, its busy crew swarming on the deck, and a crowd of +obsequious shore-boats bustling round the vessel—and to sneer at the +Mogador warrior, and vow that we English, had we been inclined to do +the business, would have performed it a great deal better. + +Now yesterday at Lisbon we saw H.M.S. “Caledonia.” THIS, on the +contrary, inspired us with feelings of respect and awful pleasure. +There she lay—the huge sea-castle—bearing the unconquerable flag of our +country. She had but to open her jaws, as it were, and she might bring +a second earthquake on the city—batter it into kingdom-come—with the +Ajuda palace and the Necessidades, the churches, and the lean, dry, +empty streets, and Don John, tremendous on horseback, in the midst of +Black Horse Square. Wherever we looked we could see that enormous +“Caledonia,” with her flashing three lines of guns. We looked at the +little boats which ever and anon came out of this monster, with humble +wonder. There was the lieutenant who boarded us at midnight before we +dropped anchor in the river: ten white-jacketed men pulling as one, +swept along with the barge, gig, boat, curricle, or coach-and-six, with +which he came up to us. We examined him—his red whiskers—his collars +turned down—his duck trousers, his bullion epaulets—with awe. With the +same reverential feeling we examined the seamen—the young gentleman in +the bows of the boat—the handsome young officers of marines we met +sauntering in the town next day—the Scotch surgeon who boarded us as we +weighed anchor—every man, down to the broken-nosed mariner who was +drunk in a wine-house, and had “Caledonia” written on his hat. Whereas +at the Frenchmen we looked with undisguised contempt. We were ready to +burst with laughter as we passed the Prince’s vessel—there was a little +French boy in a French boat alongside cleaning it, and twirling about a +little French mop—we thought it the most comical, contemptible French +boy, mop, boat, steamer, prince—Psha! it is of this wretched vapouring +stuff that false patriotism is made. I write this as a sort of homily à +propos of the day, and Cape Trafalgar, off which we lie. What business +have I to strut the deck, and clap my wings, and cry +“Cock-a-doodle-doo” over it? Some compatriots are at that work even +now. + +We have lost one by one all our jovial company. There were the five +Oporto wine-merchants—all hearty English gentlemen—gone to their +wine-butts, and their red-legged partridges, and their duels at Oporto. +It appears that these gallant Britons fight every morning among +themselves, and give the benighted people among whom they live an +opportunity to admire the spirit national. There is the brave honest +major, with his wooden leg—the kindest and simplest of Irishmen: he has +embraced his children, and reviewed his little invalid garrison of +fifteen men, in the fort which he commands at Belem, by this time, and, +I have no doubt, played to every soul of them the twelve tunes of his +musical-box. It was pleasant to see him with that musical-box—how +pleased he wound it up after dinner—how happily he listened to the +little clinking tunes as they galloped, ding-dong, after each other! A +man who carries a musical-box is always a good-natured man. + +Then there was his Grace, or his Grandeur, the Archbishop of Beyrouth +(in the parts of the infidels), His Holiness’s Nuncio to the Court of +Her Most Faithful Majesty, and who mingled among us like any simple +mortal,—except that he had an extra smiling courtesy, which simple +mortals do not always possess; and when you passed him as such, and +puffed your cigar in his face, took off his hat with a grin of such +prodigious rapture, as to lead you to suppose that the most delicious +privilege of his whole life was that permission to look at the tip of +your nose or of your cigar. With this most reverend prelate was his +Grace’s brother and chaplain—a very greasy and good-natured +ecclesiastic, who, from his physiognomy, I would have imagined to be a +dignitary of the Israelitish rather than the Romish Church—as profuse +in smiling courtesy as his Lordship of Beyrouth. These two had a meek +little secretary between them, and a tall French cook and valet, who, +at meal times, might be seen busy about the cabin where their +reverences lay. They were on their backs for the greater part of the +voyage; their yellow countenances were not only unshaven, but, to judge +from appearances, unwashed. They ate in private; and it was only of +evenings, as the sun was setting over the western wave, and, comforted +by the dinner, the cabin-passengers assembled on the quarter-deck, that +we saw the dark faces of the reverend gentlemen among us for a while. +They sank darkly into their berths when the steward’s bell tolled for +tea. + +At Lisbon, where we came to anchor at midnight, a special boat came +off, whereof the crew exhibited every token of reverence for the +ambassador of the ambassador of Heaven, and carried him off from our +company. This abrupt departure in the darkness disappointed some of us, +who had promised ourselves the pleasure of seeing his Grandeur depart +in state in the morning, shaved, clean, and in full pontificals, the +tripping little secretary swinging an incense-pot before him, and the +greasy chaplain bearing his crosier. + +Next day we had another bishop, who occupied the very same berth his +Grace of Beyrouth had quitted—was sick in the very same way— so much so +that this cabin of the “Lady Mary Wood” is to be christened “the +bishop’s berth” henceforth; and a handsome mitre is to be painted on +the basin. + +Bishop No. 2 was a very stout, soft, kind-looking old gentleman, in a +square cap, with a handsome tassel of green and gold round his portly +breast and back. He was dressed in black robes and tight purple +stockings: and we carried him from Lisbon to the little flat coast of +Faro, of which the meek old gentleman was the chief pastor. + +We had not been half-an-hour from our anchorage in the Tagus, when his +Lordship dived down into the episcopal berth. All that night there was +a good smart breeze; it blew fresh all the next day, as we went jumping +over the blue bright sea; and there was no sign of his Lordship the +bishop until we were opposite the purple hills of Algarve, which lay +some ten miles distant,—a yellow sunny shore stretching flat before +them, whose long sandy flats and villages we could see with our +telescope from the steamer. + +Presently a little vessel, with a huge shining lateen sail, and bearing +the blue and white Portuguese flag, was seen playing a sort of +leap-frog on the jolly waves, jumping over them, and ducking down as +merry as could be. This little boat came towards the steamer as quick +as ever she could jump; and Captain Cooper roaring out, “Stop her!” to +“Lady Mary Wood,” her Ladyship’s paddles suddenly ceased twirling, and +news was carried to the good bishop that his boat was almost alongside, +and that his hour was come. + +It was rather an affecting sight to see the poor old fat gentleman, +looking wistfully over the water as the boat now came up, and her eight +seamen, with great noise, energy, and gesticulation laid her by the +steamer. The steamer steps were let down; his Lordship’s servant, in +blue and yellow livery (like the Edinburgh Review), cast over the +episcopal luggage into the boat, along with his own bundle and the +jack-boots with which he rides postilion on one of the bishop’s fat +mules at Faro. The blue and yellow domestic went down the steps into +the boat. Then came the bishop’s turn; but he couldn’t do it for a long +while. He went from one passenger to another, sadly shaking them by the +hand, often taking leave and seeming loth to depart, until Captain +Cooper, in a stern but respectful tone, touched him on the shoulder, +and said, I know not with what correctness, being ignorant of the +Spanish language, “Senor ’Bispo! Senor ’Bispo!” on which summons the +poor old man, looking ruefully round him once more, put his square cap +under his arm, tucked up his long black petticoats, so as to show his +purple stockings and jolly fat calves, and went trembling down the +steps towards the boat. The good old man! I wish I had had a shake of +that trembling podgy hand somehow before he went upon his sea +martyrdom. I felt a love for that soft-hearted old Christian. Ah! let +us hope his governante tucked him comfortably in bed when he got to +Faro that night, and made him a warm gruel and put his feet in warm +water. The men clung around him, and almost kissed him as they popped +him into the boat, but he did not heed their caresses. Away went the +boat scudding madly before the wind. Bang! another lateen-sailed boat +in the distance fired a gun in his honour; but the wind was blowing +away from the shore, and who knows when that meek bishop got home to +his gruel? + +I think these were the notables of our party. I will not mention the +laughing ogling lady of Cadiz, whose manners, I very much regret to +say, were a great deal too lively for my sense of propriety; nor those +fair sufferers, her companions, who lay on the deck with sickly, +smiling female resignation: nor the heroic children, who no sooner ate +biscuit than they were ill, and no sooner were ill than they began +eating biscuit again: but just allude to one other martyr, the kind +lieutenant in charge of the mails, and who bore his cross with what I +can’t but think a very touching and noble resignation. + +There’s a certain sort of man whose doom in the world is +disappointment,—who excels in it,—and whose luckless triumphs in his +meek career of life, I have often thought, must be regarded by the kind +eyes above with as much favour as the splendid successes and +achievements of coarser and more prosperous men. As I sat with the +lieutenant upon deck, his telescope laid over his lean legs, and he +looking at the sunset with a pleased, withered old face, he gave me a +little account of his history. I take it he is in nowise disinclined to +talk about it, simple as it is: he has been seven- and-thirty years in +the navy, being somewhat more mature in the service than Lieutenant +Peel, Rear-Admiral Prince de Joinville, and other commanders who need +not be mentioned. He is a very well- educated man, and reads +prodigiously,—travels, histories, lives of eminent worthies and heroes, +in his simple way. He is not in the least angry at his want of luck in +the profession. “Were I a boy to-morrow,” he said, “I would begin it +again; and when I see my schoolfellows, and how they have got on in +life, if some are better off than I am, I find many are worse, and have +no call to be discontented.” So he carries Her Majesty’s mails meekly +through this world, waits upon port-admirals and captains in his old +glazed hat, and is as proud of the pennon at the bow of his little +boat, as if it were flying from the mainmast of a thundering +man-of-war. He gets two hundred a year for his services, and has an old +mother and a sister living in England somewhere, who I will wager +(though he never, I swear, said a word about it) have a good portion of +this princely income. + +Is it breaking a confidence to tell Lieutenant Bundy’s history? Let the +motive excuse the deed. It is a good, kind, wholesome, and noble +character. Why should we keep all our admiration for those who win in +this world, as we do, sycophants as we are? When we write a novel, our +great stupid imaginations can go no further than to marry the hero to a +fortune at the end, and to find out that he is a lord by right. O +blundering lickspittle morality! And yet I would like to fancy some +happy retributive Utopia in the peaceful cloud-land, where my friend +the meek lieutenant should find the yards of his ship manned as he went +on board, all the guns firing an enormous salute (only without the +least noise or vile smell of powder), and he be saluted on the deck as +Admiral Sir James, or Sir Joseph—ay, or Lord Viscount Bundy, knight of +all the orders above the sun. + +I think this is a sufficient, if not a complete catalogue of the +worthies on board the “Lady Mary Wood.” In the week we were on board—it +seemed a year, by the way—we came to regard the ship quite as a home. +We felt for the captain—the most good-humoured, active, careful, ready +of captains—a filial, a fraternal regard; for the providor, who +provided for us with admirable comfort and generosity, a genial +gratitude; and for the brisk steward’s lads— brisk in serving the +banquet, sympathising in handing the basin— every possible sentiment of +regard and good-will. What winds blew, and how many knots we ran, are +all noted down, no doubt, in the ship’s log: and as for what ships we +saw—every one of them with their gunnage, tonnage, their nation, their +direction whither they were bound—were not these all noted down with +surprising ingenuity and precision by the lieutenant, at a family desk +at which he sat every night, before a great paper elegantly and +mysteriously ruled off with his large ruler? I have a regard for every +man on board that ship, from the captain down to the crew—down even to +the cook, with tattooed arms, sweating among the saucepans in the +galley, who used (with a touching affection) to send us locks of his +hair in the soup. And so, while our feelings and recollections are +warm, let us shake hands with this knot of good fellows, comfortably +floating about in their little box of wood and iron, across Channel, +Biscay Bay, and the Atlantic, from Southampton Water to Gibraltar +Straits. + + + + +CHAPTER IV +GIBRALTAR + + +Suppose all the nations of the earth to send fitting ambassadors to +represent them at Wapping or Portsmouth Point, with each, under its own +national signboard and language, its appropriate house of call, and +your imagination may figure the Main Street of Gibraltar: almost the +only part of the town, I believe, which boasts of the name of street at +all, the remaining houserows being modestly called lanes, such as Bomb +Lane, Battery Lane, Fusee Lane, and so on. In Main Street the Jews +predominate, the Moors abound; and from the “Jolly Sailor,” or the +brave “Horse Marine,” where the people of our nation are drinking +British beer and gin, you hear choruses of “Garryowen” or “The Lass I +left behind me;” while through the flaring lattices of the Spanish +ventas come the clatter of castanets and the jingle and moan of Spanish +guitars and ditties. It is a curious sight at evening this thronged +street, with the people, in a hundred different costumes, bustling to +and fro under the coarse flare of the lamps; swarthy Moors, in white or +crimson robes; dark Spanish smugglers in tufted hats, with gay silk +handkerchiefs round their heads; fuddled seamen from men-of-war, or +merchantmen; porters, Galician or Genoese; and at every few minutes’ +interval, little squads of soldiers tramping to relieve guard at some +one of the innumerable posts in the town. + +Some of our party went to a Spanish venta, as a more convenient or +romantic place of residence than an English house; others made choice +of the club-house in Commercial Square, of which I formed an agreeable +picture in my imagination; rather, perhaps, resembling the Junior +United Service Club in Charles Street, by which every Londoner has +passed ere this with respectful pleasure, catching glimpses of +magnificent blazing candelabras, under which sit neat half-pay +officers, drinking half-pints of port. The club-house of Gibraltar is +not, however, of the Charles Street sort: it may have been cheerful +once, and there are yet relics of splendour about it. When officers +wore pigtails, and in the time of Governor O’Hara, it may have been a +handsome place; but it is mouldy and decrepit now; and though his +Excellency, Mr. Bulwer, was living there, and made no complaints that I +heard of, other less distinguished persons thought they had reason to +grumble. Indeed, what is travelling made of? At least half its +pleasures and incidents come out of inns; and of them the tourist can +speak with much more truth and vivacity than of historical +recollections compiled out of histories, or filched out of handbooks. +But to speak of the best inn in a place needs no apology: that, at +least, is useful information. As every person intending to visit +Gibraltar cannot have seen the flea-bitten countenances of our +companions, who fled from their Spanish venta to take refuge at the +club the morning after our arrival, they may surely be thankful for +being directed to the best house of accommodation in one of the most +unromantic, uncomfortable, and prosaic of towns. + +If one had a right to break the sacred confidence of the mahogany, I +could entertain you with many queer stories of Gibraltar life, gathered +from the lips of the gentlemen who enjoyed themselves round the dingy +tablecloth of the club-house coffee-room, richly decorated with cold +gravy and spilt beer. I heard there the very names of the gentlemen who +wrote the famous letters from the “Warspite” regarding the French +proceedings at Mogador; and met several refugee Jews from that place, +who said that they were much more afraid of the Kabyles without the +city than of the guns of the French squadron, of which they seemed to +make rather light. I heard the last odds on the ensuing match between +Captain Smith’s b. g. Bolter, and Captain Brown’s ch. c. Roarer: how +the gun-room of Her Majesty’s ship “Purgatory” had “cobbed” a tradesman +of the town, and of the row in consequence. I heard capital stories of +the way in which Wilkins had escaped the guard, and Thompson had been +locked up among the mosquitoes for being out after ten without the +lantern. I heard how the governor was an old -, but to say what, would +be breaking a confidence: only this may be divulged, that the epithet +was exceedingly complimentary to Sir Robert Wilson. All the while these +conversations were going on, a strange scene of noise and bustle was +passing in the market-place, in front of the window, where Moors, Jews, +Spaniards, soldiers were thronging in the sun; and a ragged fat fellow, +mounted on a tobacco-barrel, with his hat cocked on his ear, was +holding an auction, and roaring with an energy and impudence that would +have done credit to Covent Garden. + +The Moorish castle is the only building about the Rock which has an air +at all picturesque or romantic; there is a plain Roman Catholic +cathedral, a hideous new Protestant church of the cigar-divan +architecture, and a Court-house with a portico which is said to be an +imitation of the Parthenon: the ancient religions houses of the Spanish +town are gone, or turned into military residences, and masked so that +you would never know their former pious destination. You walk through +narrow whitewashed lanes, bearing such martial names as are before +mentioned, and by-streets with barracks on either side: small +Newgate-like looking buildings, at the doors of which you may see the +sergeants’ ladies conversing; or at the open windows of the officers’ +quarters, Ensign Fipps lying on his sofa and smoking his cigar, or +Lieutenant Simson practising the flute to while away the weary hours of +garrison dulness. I was surprised not to find more persons in the +garrison library, where is a magnificent reading-room, and an admirable +collection of books. + +In spite of the scanty herbage and the dust on the trees, the Alameda +is a beautiful walk; of which the vegetation has been as laboriously +cared for as the tremendous fortifications which flank it on either +side. The vast Rock rises on one side with its interminable works of +defence, and Gibraltar Bay is shining on the other, out on which from +the terraces immense cannon are perpetually looking, surrounded by +plantations of cannon-balls and beds of bomb-shells, sufficient, one +would think, to blow away the whole peninsula. The horticultural and +military mixture is indeed very queer: here and there temples, rustic +summer-seats, &c. have been erected in the garden, but you are sure to +see a great squat mortar look up from among the flower-pots: and amidst +the aloes and geraniums sprouts the green petticoat and scarlet coat of +a Highlander. Fatigue-parties are seen winding up the hill, and busy +about the endless cannon-ball plantations; awkward squads are drilling +in the open spaces: sentries marching everywhere, and (this is a +caution to artists) I am told have orders to run any man through who is +discovered making a sketch of the place. It is always beautiful, +especially at evening, when the people are sauntering along the walks, +and the moon is shining on the waters of the bay and the hills and +twinkling white houses of the opposite shore. Then the place becomes +quite romantic: it is too dark to see the dust on the dried leaves; the +cannon-balls do not intrude too much, but have subsided into the shade; +the awkward squads are in bed; even the loungers are gone, the +fan-flirting Spanish ladies, the sallow black-eyed children, and the +trim white-jacketed dandies. A fife is heard from some craft at roost +on the quiet waters somewhere; or a faint cheer from yonder black +steamer at the Mole, which is about to set out on some night +expedition. You forget that the town is at all like Wapping, and +deliver yourself up entirely to romance; the sentries look noble pacing +there, silent in the moonlight, and Sandy’s voice is quite musical as +he challenges with a “Who goes there?” + +“All’s Well” is very pleasant when sung decently in tune, and inspires +noble and poetic ideas of duty, courage, and danger: but when you hear +it shouted all the night through, accompanied by a clapping of muskets +in a time of profound peace, the sentinel’s cry becomes no more +romantic to the hearer than it is to the sandy Connaught-man or the +bare-legged Highlander who delivers it. It is best to read about wars +comfortably in Harry Lorrequer or Scott’s novels, in which knights +shout their war-cries, and jovial Irish bayoneteers hurrah, without +depriving you of any blessed rest. Men of a different way of thinking, +however, can suit themselves perfectly at Gibraltar; where there is +marching and counter- marching, challenging and relieving guard all the +night through. And not here in Commercial Square alone, but all over +the huge Rock in the darkness—all through the mysterious zig-zags, and +round the dark cannon-ball pyramids, and along the vast rock-galleries, +and up to the topmost flagstaff, where the sentry can look out over two +seas, poor fellows are marching and clapping muskets, and crying “All’s +Well,” dressed in cap and feather, in place of honest nightcaps best +befitting the decent hours of sleep. + +All these martial noises three of us heard to the utmost advantage, +lying on iron bedsteads at the time in a cracked old room on the +ground-floor, the open windows of which looked into the square. No spot +could be more favourably selected for watching the humours of a +garrison town by night. About midnight, the door hard by us was visited +by a party of young officers, who having had quite as much drink as was +good for them, were naturally inclined for more; and when we +remonstrated through the windows, one of them in a young tipsy voice +asked after our mothers, and finally reeled away. How charming is the +conversation of high-spirited youth! I don’t know whether the guard got +hold of them: but certainly if a civilian had been hiccuping through +the streets at that hour, he would have been carried off to the +guard-house, and left to the mercy of the mosquitoes there, and had up +before the Governor in the morning. The young man in the coffee-room +tells me he goes to sleep every night with the keys of Gibraltar under +his pillow. It is an awful image, and somehow completes the notion of +the slumbering fortress. Fancy Sir Robert Wilson, his nose just visible +over the sheets, his night-cap and the huge key (you see the very +identical one in Reynolds’s portrait of Lord Heathfield) peeping out +from under the bolster! + +If I entertain you with accounts of inns and nightcaps it is because I +am more familiar with these subjects than with history and +fortifications: as far as I can understand the former, Gibraltar is the +great British depot for smuggling goods into the Peninsula. You see +vessels lying in the harbour, and are told in so many words they are +smugglers: all those smart Spaniards with cigar and mantles are +smugglers, and run tobaccos and cotton into Catalonia; all the +respected merchants of the place are smugglers. The other day a Spanish +revenue vessel was shot to death under the thundering great guns of the +fort, for neglecting to bring to, but it so happened that it was in +chase of a smuggler: in this little corner of her dominions Britain +proclaims war to custom-houses, and protection to free trade. Perhaps +ere a very long day, England may be acting that part towards the world, +which Gibraltar performs towards Spain now; and the last war in which +we shall ever engage may be a custom-house war. For once establish +railroads and abolish preventive duties through Europe, and what is +there left to fight for? It will matter very little then under what +flag people live, and foreign ministers and ambassadors may enjoy a +dignified sinecure; the army will rise to the rank of peaceful +constables, not having any more use for their bayonets than those +worthy people have for their weapons now who accompany the law at +assizes under the name of javelin-men. The apparatus of bombs and +eighty-four- pounders may disappear from the Alameda, and the crops of +cannon- balls which now grow there may give place to other plants more +pleasant to the eye; and the great key of Gibraltar may be left in the +gate for anybody to turn at will, and Sir Robert Wilson may sleep in +quiet. + +I am afraid I thought it was rather a release, when, having made up our +minds to examine the Rock in detail and view the magnificent +excavations and galleries, the admiration of all military men, and the +terror of any enemies who may attack the fortress, we received orders +to embark forthwith in the “Tagus,” which was to early us to Malta and +Constantinople. So we took leave of this famous Rock— this great +blunderbuss—which we seized out of the hands of the natural owners a +hundred and forty years ago, and which we have kept ever since +tremendously loaded and cleaned and ready for use. To seize and have it +is doubtless a gallant thing; it is like one of those tests of courage +which one reads of in the chivalrous romances, when, for instance, Sir +Huon of Bordeaux is called upon to prove his knighthood by going to +Babylon and pulling out the Sultan’s beard and front teeth in the midst +of his Court there. But, after all, justice must confess it was rather +hard on the poor Sultan. If we had the Spaniards established at Land’s +End, with impregnable Spanish fortifications on St. Michael’s Mount, we +should perhaps come to the same conclusion. Meanwhile let us hope, +during this long period of deprivation, the Sultan of Spain is +reconciled to the loss of his front teeth and bristling whiskers— let +us even try to think that he is better without them. At all events, +right or wrong, whatever may be our title to the property, there is no +Englishman but must think with pride of the manner in which his +countrymen have kept it, and of the courage, endurance, and sense of +duty with which stout old Eliott and his companions resisted Crillon +and the Spanish battering ships and his fifty thousand men. There seems +to be something more noble in the success of a gallant resistance than +of an attack, however brave. After failing in his attack on the fort, +the French General visited the English Commander who had foiled him, +and parted from him and his garrison in perfect politeness and +good-humour. The English troops, Drinkwater says, gave him thundering +cheers as he went away, and the French in return complimented us on our +gallantry, and lauded the humanity of our people. If we are to go on +murdering each other in the old-fashioned way, what a pity it is that +our battles cannot end in the old-fashioned way too! + +One of our fellow-travellers, who had written a book, and had suffered +considerably from sea-sickness during our passage along the coasts of +France and Spain, consoled us all by saying that the very minute we got +into the Mediterranean we might consider ourselves entirely free from +illness; and, in fact, that it was unheard of in the Inland Sea. Even +in the Bay of Gibraltar the water looked bluer than anything I have +ever seen—except Miss Smith’s eyes. I thought, somehow, the delicious +faultless azure never could look angry—just like the eyes before +alluded to—and under this assurance we passed the Strait, and began +coasting the African shore calmly and without the least apprehension, +as if we were as much used to the tempest as Mr. T. P. Cooke. + +But when, in spite of the promise of the man who had written the book, +we found ourselves worse than in the worst part of the Bay of Biscay, +or off the storm-lashed rocks of Finisterre, we set down the author in +question as a gross impostor, and had a mind to quarrel with him for +leading us into this cruel error. The most provoking part of the +matter, too, was, that the sky was deliciously clear and cloudless, the +air balmy, the sea so insultingly blue that it seemed as if we had no +right to be ill at all, and that the innumerable little waves that +frisked round about our keel were enjoying an anerithmon gelasma (this +is one of my four Greek quotations: depend on it I will manage to +introduce the other three before the tour is done)—seemed to be +enjoying, I say, the above-named Greek quotation at our expense. Here +is the dismal log of Wednesday, 4th of September: —“All attempts at +dining very fruitless. Basins in requisition. Wind hard ahead. Que +diable allais-je faire dans cette galere? Writing or thinking +impossible: so read ‘Letters from the AEgean.’” These brief words give, +I think, a complete idea of wretchedness, despair, remorse, and +prostration of soul and body. Two days previously we passed the forts +and moles and yellow buildings of Algiers, rising very stately from the +sea, and skirted by gloomy purple lines of African shore, with fires +smoking in the mountains, and lonely settlements here and there. + +On the 5th, to the inexpressible joy of all, we reached Valetta, the +entrance to the harbour of which is one of the most stately and +agreeable scenes ever admired by sea-sick traveller. The small basin +was busy with a hundred ships, from the huge guard-ship, which lies +there a city in itself;—merchantmen loading and crews cheering, under +all the flags of the world flaunting in the sunshine; a half-score of +busy black steamers perpetually coming and going, coaling and painting, +and puffing and hissing in and out of harbour; slim men-of-war’s barges +shooting to and fro, with long shining oars flashing like wings over +the water; hundreds of painted town-boats, with high heads and white +awnings,—down to the little tubs in which some naked, tawny young +beggars came paddling up to the steamer, entreating us to let them dive +for halfpence. Round this busy blue water rise rocks, blazing in +sunshine, and covered with every imaginable device of fortification; to +the right, St. Elmo, with flag and lighthouse; and opposite, the +Military Hospital, looking like a palace; and all round, the houses of +the city, for its size the handsomest and most stately in the world. + +Nor does it disappoint you on a closer inspection, as many a foreign +town does. The streets are thronged with a lively comfortable-looking +population; the poor seem to inhabit handsome stone palaces, with +balconies and projecting windows of heavy carved stone. The lights and +shadows, the cries and stenches, the fruit-shops and fish-stalls, the +dresses and chatter of all nations; the soldiers in scarlet, and women +in black mantillas; the beggars, boat-men, barrels of pickled herrings +and macaroni; the shovel-hatted priests and bearded capuchins; the +tobacco, grapes, onions, and sunshine; the signboards, bottled-porter +stores, the statues of saints and little chapels which jostle the +stranger’s eyes as he goes up the famous stairs from the Water-gate, +make a scene of such pleasant confusion and liveliness as I have never +witnessed before. And the effect of the groups of multitudinous actors +in this busy cheerful drama is heightened, as it were, by the +decorations of the stage. The sky is delightfully brilliant; all the +houses and ornaments are stately; castle and palaces are rising all +around; and the flag, towers, and walls of Fort St. Elmo look as fresh +and magnificent as if they had been erected only yesterday. + +The Strada Reale has a much more courtly appearance than that one +described. Here are palaces, churches, court-houses and libraries, the +genteel London shops, and the latest articles of perfumery. Gay young +officers are strolling about in shell-jackets much too small for them: +midshipmen are clattering by on hired horses; squads of priests, +habited after the fashion of Don Basilio in the opera, are demurely +pacing to and fro; professional beggars run shrieking after the +stranger; and agents for horses, for inns, and for worse places still, +follow him and insinuate the excellence of their goods. The houses +where they are selling carpet-bags and pomatum were the palaces of the +successors of the goodliest company of gallant knights the world ever +heard tell of. It seems unromantic; but THESE were not the romantic +Knights of St. John. The heroic days of the Order ended as the last +Turkish galley lifted anchor after the memorable siege. The present +stately houses were built in times of peace and splendour and decay. I +doubt whether the Auberge de Provence, where the “Union Club” +flourishes now, has ever seen anything more romantic than the pleasant +balls held in the great room there. + +The Church of St. John, not a handsome structure without, is +magnificent within: a noble hall covered with a rich embroidery of +gilded carving, the chapels of the different nations on either side, +but not interfering with the main structure, of which the whole is +simple, and the details only splendid; it seemed to me a fitting place +for this wealthy body of aristocratic soldiers, who made their +devotions as it were on parade, and, though on their knees, never +forgot their epaulets or their quarters of nobility. This mixture of +religion and worldly pride seems incongruous at first; but have we not +at church at home similar relics of feudal ceremony?—the verger with +the silver mace who precedes the vicar to the desk; the two chaplains +of my Lord Archbishop, who bow over his Grace as he enters the +communion-table gate; even poor John, who follows my Lady with a +coroneted prayer-book, and makes his conge as he hands it into the pew. +What a chivalrous absurdity is the banner of some high and mighty +prince, hanging over his stall in Windsor Chapel, when you think of the +purpose for which men are supposed to assemble there! The Church of the +Knights of St. John is paved over with sprawling heraldic devices of +the dead gentlemen of the dead Order; as if, in the next world, they +expected to take rank in conformity with their pedigrees, and would be +marshalled into heaven according to the orders of precedence. Cumbrous +handsome paintings adorn the walls and chapels, decorated with pompous +monuments of Grand Masters. Beneath is a crypt, where more of these +honourable and reverend warriors lie, in a state that a Simpson would +admire. In the altar are said to lie three of the most gallant relics +in the world: the keys of Acre, Rhodes, and Jerusalem. What blood was +shed in defending these emblems! What faith, endurance, genius, and +generosity; what pride, hatred, ambition, and savage lust of blood were +roused together for their guardianship! + +In the lofty halls and corridors of the Governor’s house, some +portraits of the late Grand Masters still remain: a very fine one, by +Caravaggio, of a knight in gilt armour, hangs in the dining- room, near +a full-length of poor Louis XVI., in Royal robes, the very picture of +uneasy impotency. But the portrait of De Vignacourt is the only one +which has a respectable air; the other chiefs of the famous Society are +pompous old gentlemen in black, with huge periwigs, and crowns round +their hats, and a couple of melancholy pages in yellow and red. But +pages and wigs and Grand Masters have almost faded out of the canvas, +and are vanishing into Hades with a most melancholy indistinctness. The +names of most of these gentlemen, however, live as yet in the forts of +the place, which all seem to have been eager to build and christen: so +that it seems as if, in the Malta mythology, they had been turned into +freestone. + +In the armoury is the very suit painted by Caravaggio, by the side of +the armour of the noble old La Valette, whose heroism saved his island +from the efforts of Mustapha and Dragut, and an army quite as fierce +and numerous as that which was baffled before Gibraltar, by similar +courage and resolution. The sword of the last-named famous corsair (a +most truculent little scimitar), thousands of pikes and halberts, +little old cannons and wall-pieces, helmets and cuirasses, which the +knights or their people wore, are trimly arranged against the wall, +and, instead of spiking Turks or arming warriors, now serve to point +morals and adorn tales. And here likewise are kept many thousand +muskets, swords, and boarding-pikes for daily use, and a couple of +ragged old standards of one of the English regiments, who pursued and +conquered in Egypt the remains of the haughty and famous French +republican army, at whose appearance the last knights of Malta flung +open the gates of all their fortresses, and consented to be +extinguished without so much as a remonstrance, or a kick, or a +struggle. + +We took a drive into what may be called the country; where the fields +are rocks, and the hedges are stones—passing by the stone gardens of +the Florian, and wondering at the number and handsomeness of the stone +villages and churches rising everywhere among the stony hills. Handsome +villas were passed everywhere, and we drove for a long distance along +the sides of an aqueduct, quite a Royal work of the Caravaggio in gold +armour, the Grand Master De Vignacourt. A most agreeable contrast to +the arid rocks of the general scenery was the garden at the Governor’s +country-house; with the orange-trees and water, its beautiful golden +grapes, luxuriant flowers, and thick cool shrubberies. The eye longs +for this sort of refreshment, after being seared with the hot glare of +the general country; and St. Antonio was as pleasant after Malta as +Malta was after the sea. + +We paid the island a subsequent visit in November, passing seventeen +days at an establishment called Fort Manuel there, and by punsters the +Manuel des Voyageurs; where Government accommodates you with quarters; +where the authorities are so attentive as to scent your letters with +aromatic vinegar before you receive them, and so careful of your health +as to lock you up in your room every night lest you should walk in your +sleep, and so over the battlements into the sea—if you escaped drowning +in the sea, the sentries on the opposite shore would fire at you, hence +the nature of the precaution. To drop, however, this satirical strain: +those who know what quarantine is, may fancy that the place somehow +becomes unbearable in which it has been endured. And though the +November climate of Malta is like the most delicious May in England, +and though there is every gaiety and amusement in the town, a +comfortable little opera, a good old library filled full of good old +books (none of your works of modern science, travel, and history, but +good old USELESS books of the last two centuries), and nobody to +trouble you in reading them, and though the society of Valetta is most +hospitable, varied, and agreeable, yet somehow one did not feel SAFE in +the island, with perpetual glimpses of Fort Manuel from the opposite +shore; and, lest the quarantine authorities should have a fancy to +fetch one back again, on a pretext of posthumous plague, we made our +way to Naples by the very first opportunity—those who remained, that +is, of the little Eastern Expedition. They were not all there. The +Giver of life and death had removed two of our company: one was left +behind to die in Egypt, with a mother to bewail his loss, another we +buried in the dismal lazaretto cemetery. + +* * * + +One is bound to look at this, too, as a part of our journey. Disease +and death are knocking perhaps at your next cabin door. Your kind and +cheery companion has ridden his last ride and emptied his last glass +beside you. And while fond hearts are yearning for him far away, and +his own mind, if conscious, is turning eagerly towards the spot of the +world whither affection or interest calls it—the Great Father summons +the anxious spirit from earth to himself, and ordains that the nearest +and dearest shall meet here no more. + +Such an occurrence as a death in a lazaretto, mere selfishness renders +striking. We were walking with him but two days ago on deck. One has a +sketch of him, another his card, with the address written yesterday, +and given with an invitation to come and see him at home in the +country, where his children are looking for him. He is dead in a day, +and buried in the walls of the prison. A doctor felt his pulse by +deputy—a clergyman comes from the town to read the last service over +him—and the friends, who attend his funeral, are marshalled by +lazaretto-guardians, so as not to touch each other. Every man goes back +to his room and applies the lesson to himself. One would not so depart +without seeing again the dear dear faces. We reckon up those we love: +they are but very few, but I think one loves them better than ever now. +Should it be your turn next?—and why not? Is it pity or comfort to +think of that affection which watches and survives you? + +The Maker has linked together the whole race of man with this chain of +love. I like to think that there is no man but has had kindly feelings +for some other, and he for his neighbour, until we bind together the +whole family of Adam. Nor does it end here. It joins heaven and earth +together. For my friend or my child of past days is still my friend or +my child to me here, or in the home prepared for us by the Father of +all. If identity survives the grave, as our faith tells us, is it not a +consolation to think that there may be one or two souls among the +purified and just, whose affection watches us invisible, and follows +the poor sinner on earth? + + + + +CHAPTER V +ATHENS + + +Not feeling any enthusiasm myself about Athens, my bounden duty of +course is clear, to sneer and laugh heartily at all who have. In fact, +what business has a lawyer, who was in Pump Court this day three weeks, +and whose common reading is law reports or the newspaper, to pretend to +fall in love for the long vacation with mere poetry, of which I swear a +great deal is very doubtful, and to get up an enthusiasm quite foreign +to his nature and usual calling in life? What call have ladies to +consider Greece “romantic,” they who get their notions of mythology +from the well-known pages of “Tooke’s Pantheon”? What is the reason +that blundering Yorkshire squires, young dandies from Corfu regiments, +jolly sailors from ships in the harbour, and yellow old Indians +returning from Bundelcund, should think proper to be enthusiastic about +a country of which they know nothing; the mere physical beauty of which +they cannot, for the most part, comprehend; and because certain +characters lived in it two thousand four hundred years ago? What have +these people in common with Pericles, what have these ladies in common +with Aspasia (O fie)? Of the race of Englishmen who come wandering +about the tomb of Socrates, do you think the majority would not have +voted to hemlock him? Yes: for the very same superstition which leads +men by the nose now, drove them onward in the days when the lowly +husband of Xantippe died for daring to think simply and to speak the +truth. I know of no quality more magnificent in fools than their faith: +that perfect consciousness they have, that they are doing virtuous and +meritorious actions, when they are performing acts of folly, murdering +Socrates, or pelting Aristides with holy oyster-shells—all for Virtue’s +sake; and a “History of Dulness in all Ages of the World,” is a book +which a philosopher would surely be hanged, but as certainly blessed, +for writing. + +If papa and mamma (honour be to them!) had not followed the faith of +their fathers, and thought proper to send away their only beloved son +(afterwards to be celebrated under the name of Titmarsh) into ten +years’ banishment of infernal misery, tyranny, annoyance; to give over +the fresh feelings of the heart of the little Michael Angelo to the +discipline of vulgar bullies, who, in order to lead tender young +children to the Temple of Learning (as they do in the spelling-books), +drive them on with clenched fists and low abuse; if they fainted, +revive them with a thump, or assailed them with a curse; if they were +miserable, consoled them with a brutal jeer—if, I say, my dear parents, +instead of giving me the inestimable benefit of a ten years’ classical +education, had kept me at home with my dear thirteen sisters, it is +probable I should have liked this country of Attica, in sight of the +blue shores of which the present pathetic letter is written; but I was +made so miserable in youth by a classical education, that all connected +with it is disagreeable in my eyes; and I have the same recollection of +Greek in youth that I have of castor-oil. + +So in coming in sight of the promontory of Sunium, where the Greek +Muse, in an awful vision, came to me, and said in a patronising way, +“Why, my dear” (she always, the old spinster, adopts this high and +mighty tone)—“Why, my dear, are you not charmed to be in this famous +neighbourhood, in this land of poets and heroes, of whose history your +classical education ought to have made you a master? if it did not, you +have wofully neglected your opportunities, and your dear parents have +wasted their money in sending you to school.” I replied, “Madam, your +company in youth was made so laboriously disagreeable to me, that I +can’t at present reconcile myself to you in age. I read your poets, but +it was in fear and trembling; and a cold sweat is but an ill +accompaniment to poetry. I blundered through your histories; but +history is so dull (saving your presence) of herself, that when the +brutal dulness of a schoolmaster is superadded to her own slow +conversation, the union becomes intolerable: hence I have not the +slightest pleasure in renewing my acquaintance with a lady who has been +the source of so much bodily and mental discomfort to me.” To make a +long story short, I am anxious to apologise for a want of enthusiasm in +the classical line, and to excuse an ignorance which is of the most +undeniable sort. + +This is an improper frame of mind for a person visiting the land of +AEschylus and Euripides; add to which, we have been abominably +overcharged at the inn: and what are the blue hills of Attica, the +silver calm basin of Piraeus, the heathery heights of Pentelicus, and +yonder rocks crowned by the Doric columns of the Parthenon, and the +thin Ionic shafts of the Erechtheum, to a man who has had little rest, +and is bitten all over by bugs? Was Alcibiades bitten by bugs, I +wonder; and did the brutes crawl over him as he lay in the rosy arms of +Phryne? I wished all night for Socrates’s hammock or basket, as it is +described in the “Clouds;” in which resting- place, no doubt, the +abominable animals kept perforce clear of him. + +A French man-of-war, lying in the silvery little harbour, sternly +eyeing out of its stern portholes a saucy little English corvette +beside, began playing sounding marches as a crowd of boats came +paddling up to the steamer’s side to convey us travellers to shore. +There were Russian schooners and Greek brigs lying in this little bay; +dumpy little windmills whirling round on the sunburnt heights round +about it; an improvised town of quays and marine taverns has sprung up +on the shore; a host of jingling barouches, more miserable than any to +be seen even in Germany, were collected at the landing-place; and the +Greek drivers (how queer they looked in skull-caps, shabby jackets with +profuse embroidery of worsted, and endless petticoats of dirty calico!) +began, in a generous ardour for securing passengers, to abuse each +other’s horses and carriages in the regular London fashion. Satire +could certainly hardly caricature the vehicle in which we were made to +journey to Athens; and it was only by thinking that, bad as they were, +these coaches were much more comfortable contrivances than any +Alcibiades or Cimon ever had, that we consoled ourselves along the +road. It was flat for six miles along the plain to the city: and you +see for the greater part of the way the purple mount on which the +Acropolis rises, and the gleaming houses of the town spread beneath. +Round this wide, yellow, barren plain,—a stunted district of +olive-trees is almost the only vegetation visible—there rises, as it +were, a sort of chorus of the most beautiful mountains; the most +elegant, gracious, and noble the eye ever looked on. These hills did +not appear at all lofty or terrible, but superbly rich and +aristocratic. The clouds were dancing round about them; you could see +their rosy purple shadows sweeping round the clear serene summits of +the hill. To call a hill aristocratic seems affected or absurd; but the +difference between these hills and the others, is the difference +between Newgate Prison and the Travellers’ Club, for instance: both are +buildings; but the one stern, dark, and coarse; the other rich, +elegant, and festive. At least, so I thought. With such a stately +palace as munificent Nature had built for these people, what could they +be themselves but lordly, beautiful, brilliant, brave, and wise? We saw +four Greeks on donkeys on the road (which is a dust-whirlwind where it +is not a puddle); and other four were playing with a dirty pack of +cards, at a barrack that English poets have christened the “Half-way +House.” Does external nature and beauty influence the soul to good? You +go about Warwickshire, and fancy that from merely being born and +wandering in those sweet sunny plains and fresh woodlands Shakspeare +must have drunk in a portion of that frank artless sense of beauty +which lies about his works like a bloom or dew; but a Coventry +ribbon-maker, or a slang Leamington squire, are looking on those very +same landscapes too, and what do they profit? You theorise about the +influence which the climate and appearance of Attica must have had in +ennobling those who were born there: yonder dirty, swindling, ragged +blackguards, lolling over greasy cards three hours before noon, +quarrelling and shrieking, armed to the teeth and afraid to fight, are +bred out of the same land which begot the philosophers and heroes. But +the “Half-way House” is passed by this time, and behold! we are in the +capital of King Otho. + +I swear solemnly that I would rather have two hundred a year in Fleet +Street, than be King of the Greeks, with Basileus written before my +name round their beggarly coin; with the bother of perpetual +revolutions in my huge plaster-of-Paris palace, with no amusement but a +drive in the afternoon over a wretched arid country, where roads are +not made, with ambassadors (the deuce knows why, for what good can the +English, or the French, or the Russian party get out of such a bankrupt +alliance as this?) perpetually pulling and tugging at me, away from +honest Germany, where there is beer and aesthetic conversation, and +operas at a small cost. The shabbiness of this place actually beats +Ireland, and that is a strong word. The palace of the Basileus is an +enormous edifice of plaster, in a square containing six houses, three +donkeys, no roads, no fountains (except in the picture of the inn); +backwards it seems to look straight to the mountain—on one side is a +beggarly garden—the King goes out to drive (revolutions permitting) at +five—some four-and-twenty blackguards saunter up to the huge sandhill +of a terrace, as His Majesty passes by in a gilt barouche and an absurd +fancy dress; the gilt barouche goes plunging down the sandhills; the +two dozen soldiers, who have been presenting arms, slouch off to their +quarters; the vast barrack of a palace remains entirely white, ghastly, +and lonely; and, save the braying of a donkey now and then (which +long-eared minstrels are more active and sonorous in Athens than in any +place I know), all is entirely silent round Basileus’s palace. How +could people who knew Leopold fancy he would be so “jolly green” as to +take such a berth? It was only a gobemouche of a Bavarian that could +ever have been induced to accept it. + +I beseech you to believe that it was not the bill and the bugs at the +inn which induced the writer hereof to speak so slightingly of the +residence of Basileus. These evils are now cured and forgotten. This is +written off the leaden flats and mounds which they call the Troad. It +is stern justice alone which pronounces this excruciating sentence. It +was a farce to make this place into a kingly capital; and I make no +manner of doubt that King Otho, the very day he can get away +unperceived, and get together the passage- money, will be off for dear +old Deutschland, Fatherland, Beerland! + +I have never seen a town in England which may be compared to this; for +though Herne Bay is a ruin now, money was once spent upon it and houses +built; here, beyond a few score of mansions comfortably laid out, the +town is little better than a rickety agglomeration of larger and +smaller huts, tricked out here and there with the most absurd cracked +ornaments and cheap attempts at elegance. But neatness is the elegance +of poverty, and these people despise such a homely ornament. I have got +a map with squares, fountains, theatres, public gardens, and Places +d’Othon marked out; but they only exist in the paper capital—the +wretched tumble-down wooden one boasts of none. + +One is obliged to come back to the old disagreeable comparison of +Ireland. Athens may be about as wealthy a place as Carlow or +Killarney—the streets swarm with idle crowds, the innumerable little +lanes flow over with dirty little children, they are playing and +puddling about in the dirt everywhere, with great big eyes, yellow +faces, and the queerest little gowns and skull-caps. But in the outer +man, the Greek has far the advantage of the Irishman: most of them are +well and decently dressed (if five-and-twenty yards of petticoat may +not be called decent, what may?), they swagger to and fro with huge +knives in their girdles. Almost all the men are handsome, but live +hard, it is said, in order to decorate their backs with those fine +clothes of theirs. I have seen but two or three handsome women, and +these had the great drawback which is common to the race—I mean, a +sallow, greasy, coarse complexion, at which it was not advisable to +look too closely. + +And on this score I think we English may pride ourselves on possessing +an advantage (by WE, I mean the lovely ladies to whom this is addressed +with the most respectful compliments) over the most classical country +in the world. I don’t care for beauty which will only bear to be looked +at from a distance, like a scene in a theatre. What is the most +beautiful nose in the world, if it be covered with a skin of the +texture and colour of coarse whitey- brown paper; and if Nature has +made it as slippery and shining as though it had been anointed with +pomatum? They may talk about beauty, but would you wear a flower that +had been dipped in a grease-pot? No; give me a fresh, dewy, healthy +rose out of Somersetshire; not one of those superb, tawdry, unwholesome +exotics, which are only good to make poems about. Lord Byron wrote more +cant of this sort than any poet I know of. Think of “the peasant girls +with dark blue eyes” of the Rhine—the brown-faced, flat-nosed, +thick-lipped, dirty wenches! Think of “filling high a cup of Samian +wine;” small beer is nectar compared to it, and Byron himself always +drank gin. That man never wrote from his heart. He got up rapture and +enthusiasm with an eye to the public; but this is dangerous ground, +even more dangerous than to look Athens full in the face, and say that +your eyes are not dazzled by its beauty. The Great Public admires +Greece and Byron: the public knows best. Murray’s “Guide-book” calls +the latter “our native bard.” Our native bard! Mon Dieu! HE +Shakspeare’s, Milton’s, Keats’s, Scott’s native bard! Well, woe be to +the man who denies the public gods! + +The truth is, then, that Athens is a disappointment; and I am angry +that it should be so. To a skilled antiquarian, or an enthusiastic +Greek scholar, the feelings created by a sight of the place of course +will be different; but you who would be inspired by it must undergo a +long preparation of reading, and possess, too, a particular feeling; +both of which, I suspect, are uncommon in our busy commercial +newspaper-reading country. Men only say they are enthusiastic about the +Greek and Roman authors and history, because it is considered proper +and respectable. And we know how gentlemen in Baker Street have +editions of the classics handsomely bound in the library, and how they +use them. Of course they don’t retire to read the newspaper; it is to +look over a favourite ode of Pindar, or to discuss an obscure passage +in Athenaeus! Of course country magistrates and Members of Parliament +are always studying Demosthenes and Cicero; we know it from their +continual habit of quoting the Latin grammar in Parliament. But it is +agreed that the classics are respectable; therefore we are to be +enthusiastic about them. Also let us admit that Byron is to be held up +as “our native bard.” + +I am not so entire a heathen as to be insensible to the beauty of those +relics of Greek art, of which men much more learned and enthusiastic +have written such piles of descriptions. I thought I could recognise +the towering beauty of the prodigious columns of the Temple of Jupiter; +and admire the astonishing grace, severity, elegance, completeness of +the Parthenon. The little Temple of Victory, with its fluted Corinthian +shafts, blazed under the sun almost as fresh as it must have appeared +to the eyes of its founders; I saw nothing more charming and brilliant, +more graceful, festive, and aristocratic than this sumptuous little +building. The Roman remains which lie in the town below look like the +works of barbarians beside these perfect structures. They jar strangely +on the eye, after it has been accustoming itself to perfect harmony and +proportions. If, as the schoolmaster tells us, the Greek writing is as +complete as the Greek art; if an ode of Pindar is as glittering and +pure as the Temple of Victory; or a discourse of Plato as polished and +calm as yonder mystical portico of the Erechtheum: what treasures of +the senses and delights of the imagination have those lost to whom the +Greek books are as good as sealed! + +And yet one meets with very dull first-class men. Genius won’t +transplant from one brain to another, or is ruined in the carriage, +like fine Burgundy. Sir Robert Peel and Sir John Hobhouse are both good +scholars; but their poetry in Parliament does not strike one as fine. +Muzzle, the schoolmaster, who is bullying poor trembling little boys, +was a fine scholar when he was a sizar, and a ruffian then and ever +since. Where is the great poet, since the days of Milton, who has +improved the natural offshoots of his brain by grafting it from the +Athenian tree? + +I had a volume of Tennyson in my pocket, which somehow settled that +question, and ended the querulous dispute between me and Conscience, +under the shape of the neglected and irritated Greek muse, which had +been going on ever since I had commenced my walk about Athens. The old +spinster saw me wince at the idea of the author of Dora and Ulysses, +and tried to follow up her advantage by farther hints of time lost, and +precious opportunities thrown away. “You might have written poems like +them,” said she; “or, no, not like them perhaps, but you might have +done a neat prize poem, and pleased your papa and mamma. You might have +translated Jack and Jill into Greek iambics, and been a credit to your +college.” I turned testily away from her. “Madam,” says I, “because an +eagle houses on a mountain, or soars to the sun, don’t you be angry +with a sparrow that perches on a garret window, or twitters on a twig. +Leave me to myself: look, my beak is not aquiline by any means.” + +And so, my dear friend, you who have been reading this last page in +wonder, and who, instead of a description of Athens, have been +accommodated with a lament on the part of the writer, that he was idle +at school, and does not know Greek, excuse this momentary outbreak of +egotistic despondency. To say truth, dear Jones, when one walks among +the nests of the eagles, and sees the prodigious eggs they laid, a +certain feeling of discomfiture must come over us smaller birds. You +and I could not invent—it even stretches our minds painfully to try and +comprehend part of the beauty of the Parthenon—ever so little of +it,—the beauty of a single column,—a fragment of a broken shaft lying +under the astonishing blue sky there, in the midst of that unrivalled +landscape. There may be grander aspects of nature, but none more +deliciously beautiful. The hills rise in perfect harmony, and fall in +the most exquisite cadences—the sea seems brighter, the islands more +purple, the clouds more light and rosy than elsewhere. As you look up +through the open roof, you are almost oppressed by the serene depth of +the blue overhead. Look even at the fragments of the marble, how soft +and pure it is, glittering and white like fresh snow! “I was all +beautiful,” it seems to say: “even the hidden parts of me were +spotless, precious, and fair”—and so, musing over this wonderful scene, +perhaps I get some feeble glimpse or idea of that ancient Greek spirit +which peopled it with sublime races of heroes and gods; {1} and which I +never could get out of a Greek book,—no, not though Muzzle flung it at +my head. + + + + +CHAPTER VI +SMYRNA—FIRST GLIMPSES OF THE EAST + + +I am glad that the Turkish part of Athens was extinct, so that I should +not be baulked of the pleasure of entering an Eastern town by an +introduction to any garbled or incomplete specimen of one. Smyrna seems +to me the most Eastern of all I have seen; as Calais will probably +remain to the Englishman the most French town in the world. The +jack-boots of the postilions don’t seem so huge elsewhere, or the tight +stockings of the maid-servants so Gallic. The churches and the +ramparts, and the little soldiers on them, remain for ever impressed +upon your memory; from which larger temples and buildings, and whole +armies have subsequently disappeared: and the first words of actual +French heard spoken, and the first dinner at “Quillacq’s,” remain after +twenty years as clear as on the first day. Dear Jones, can’t you +remember the exact smack of the white hermitage, and the toothless old +fellow singing “Largo al factotum”? + +The first day in the East is like that. After that there is nothing. +The wonder is gone, and the thrill of that delightful shock, which so +seldom touches the nerves of plain men of the world, though they seek +for it everywhere. One such looked out at Smyrna from our steamer, and +yawned without the least excitement, and did not betray the slightest +emotion, as boats with real Turks on board came up to the ship. There +lay the town with minarets and cypresses, domes and castles; great guns +were firing off, and the blood-red flag of the Sultan flaring over the +fort ever since sunrise; woods and mountains came down to the gulf’s +edge, and as you looked at them with the telescope, there peeped out of +the general mass a score of pleasant episodes of Eastern life—there +were cottages with quaint roofs; silent cool kiosks, where the chief of +the eunuchs brings down the ladies of the harem. I saw Hassan, the +fisherman, getting his nets; and Ali Baba going off with his donkey to +the great forest for wood. Smith looked at these wonders quite unmoved; +and I was surprised at his apathy; but he had been at Smyrna before. A +man only sees the miracle once; though you yearn over it ever so, it +won’t come again. I saw nothing of Ali Baba and Hassan the next time we +came to Smyrna, and had some doubts (recollecting the badness of the +inn) about landing at all. A person who wishes to understand France or +the East should come in a yacht to Calais or Smyrna, land for two +hours, and never afterwards go back again. + +But those two hours are beyond measure delightful. Some of us were +querulous up to that time, and doubted of the wisdom of making the +voyage. Lisbon, we owned, was a failure; Athens a dead failure; Malta +very well, but not worth the trouble and sea-sickness: in fact, +Baden-Baden or Devonshire would be a better move than this; when Smyrna +came, and rebuked all mutinous Cockneys into silence. Some men may read +this who are in want of a sensation. If they love the odd and +picturesque, if they loved the “Arabian Nights” in their youth, let +them book themselves on board one of the Peninsular and Oriental +vessels, and try one DIP into Constantinople or Smyrna. Walk into the +bazaar, and the East is unveiled to you: how often and often have you +tried to fancy this, lying out on a summer holiday at school! It is +wonderful, too, how LIKE it is: you may imagine that you have been in +the place before, you seem to know it so well! + +The beauty of that poetry is, to me, that it was never too handsome; +there is no fatigue of sublimity about it. Shacabac and the little +Barber play as great a part in it as the heroes; there are no +uncomfortable sensations of terror; you may be familiar with the great +Afreet, who was going to execute the travellers for killing his son +with a date-stone. Morgiana, when she kills the forty robbers with +boiling oil, does not seem to hurt them in the least; and though King +Schahriar makes a practice of cutting off his wives’ heads, yet you +fancy they have got them on again in some of the back rooms of the +palace, where they are dancing and playing on dulcimers. How fresh, +easy, good-natured, is all this! How delightful is that notion of the +pleasant Eastern people about knowledge, where the height of science is +made to consist in the answering of riddles! and all the mathematicians +and magicians bring their great beards to bear on a conundrum! + +When I got into the bazaar among this race, somehow I felt as if they +were all friends. There sat the merchants in their little shops, quiet +and solemn, but with friendly looks. There was no smoking, it was the +Ramazan; no eating, the fish and meat fizzing in the enormous pots of +the cook-shops are only for the Christians. The children abounded; the +law is not so stringent upon them, and many wandering merchants were +there selling figs (in the name of the Prophet, doubtless) for their +benefit, and elbowing onwards with baskets of grapes and cucumbers. +Countrymen passed bristling over with arms, each with a huge bellyful +of pistols and daggers in his girdle; fierce, but not the least +dangerous. Wild swarthy Arabs, who had come in with the caravans, +walked solemnly about, very different in look and demeanour from the +sleek inhabitants of the town. Greeks and Jews squatted and smoked, +their shops tended by sallow-faced boys, with large eyes, who smiled +and welcomed you in; negroes bustled about in gaudy colours; and women, +with black nose-bags and shuffling yellow slippers, chattered and +bargained at the doors of the little shops. There was the rope quarter +and the sweetmeat quarter, and the pipe bazaar and the arm bazaar, and +the little turned-up shoe quarter, and the shops where ready-made +jackets and pelisses were swinging, and the region where, under the +ragged awning, regiments of tailors were at work. The sun peeps through +these awnings of mat or canvas, which are hung over the narrow lanes of +the bazaar, and ornaments them with a thousand freaks of light and +shadow. Cogia Hassan Alhabbal’s shop is in a blaze of light; while his +neighbour, the barber and coffee-house keeper, has his premises, his +low seats and narghiles, his queer pots and basins, in the shade. The +cobblers are always good- natured; there was one who, I am sure, has +been revealed to me in my dreams, in a dirty old green turban, with a +pleasant wrinkled face like an apple, twinkling his little grey eyes as +he held them up to talk to the gossips, and smiling under a delightful +old grey beard, which did the heart good to see. You divine the +conversation between him and the cucumber-man, as the Sultan used to +understand the language of birds. Are any of those cucumbers stuffed +with pearls, and is that Armenian with the black square turban Haroun +Alraschid in disguise, standing yonder by the fountain where the +children are drinking—the gleaming marble fountain, chequered all over +with light and shadow, and engraved with delicate arabesques and +sentences from the Koran? + +But the greatest sensation of all is when the camels come. Whole +strings of real camels, better even than in the procession of Blue +Beard, with soft rolling eyes and bended necks, swaying from one side +of the bazaar to the other to and fro, and treading gingerly with their +great feet. O you fairy dreams of boyhood! O you sweet meditations of +half-holidays, here you are realised for half-an- hour! The genius +which presides over youth led us to do a good action that day. There +was a man sitting in an open room, ornamented with fine long-tailed +sentences of the Koran: some in red, some in blue; some written +diagonally over the paper; some so shaped as to represent ships, +dragons, or mysterious animals. The man squatted on a carpet in the +middle of this room, with folded arms, waggling his head to and fro, +swaying about, and singing through his nose choice phrases from the +sacred work. But from the room above came a clear noise of many little +shouting voices, much more musical than that of Naso in the matted +parlour, and the guide told us it was a school, so we went upstairs to +look. + +I declare, on my conscience, the master was in the act of bastinadoing +a little mulatto boy; his feet were in a bar, and the brute was laying +on with a cane; so we witnessed the howling of the poor boy, and the +confusion of the brute who was administering the correction. The other +children were made to shout, I believe, to drown the noise of their +little comrade’s howling; but the punishment was instantly discontinued +as our hats came up over the stair-trap, and the boy cast loose, and +the bamboo huddled into a corner, and the schoolmaster stood before us +abashed. All the small scholars in red caps, and the little girls in +gaudy handkerchiefs, turned their big wondering dark eyes towards us; +and the caning was over for THAT time, let us trust. I don’t envy some +schoolmasters in a future state. I pity that poor little blubbering +Mahometan: he will never be able to relish the “Arabian Nights” in the +original, all his life long. + +From this scene we rushed off somewhat discomposed to make a breakfast +off red mullets and grapes, melons, pomegranates, and Smyrna wine, at a +dirty little comfortable inn, to which we were recommended: and from +the windows of which we had a fine cheerful view of the gulf and its +busy craft, and the loungers and merchants along the shore. There were +camels unloading at one wharf, and piles of melons much bigger than the +Gibraltar cannon-balls at another. It was the fig-season, and we passed +through several alleys encumbered with long rows of fig-dressers, +children and women for the most part, who were packing the fruit +diligently into drums, dipping them in salt-water first, and spreading +them neatly over with leaves; while the figs and leaves are drying, +large white worms crawl out of them, and swarm over the decks of the +ships which carry them to Europe and to England, where small children +eat them with pleasure—I mean the figs, not the worms—and where they +are still served at wine-parties at the Universities. When fresh they +are not better than elsewhere; but the melons are of admirable flavour, +and so large, that Cinderella might almost be accommodated with a coach +made of a big one, without any very great distension of its original +proportions. + +Our guide, an accomplished swindler, demanded two dollars as the fee +for entering the mosque, which others of our party subsequently saw for +sixpence, so we did not care to examine that place of worship. But +there were other cheaper sights, which were to the full as picturesque, +for which there was no call to pay money, or, indeed, for a day, +scarcely to move at all. I doubt whether a man who would smoke his pipe +on a bazaar counter all day, and let the city flow by him, would not be +almost as well employed as the most active curiosity-hunter. + +To be sure he would not see the women. Those in the bazaar were shabby +people for the most part, whose black masks nobody would feel a +curiosity to remove. You could see no more of their figures than if +they had been stuffed in bolsters; and even their feet were brought to +a general splay uniformity by the double yellow slippers which the +wives of true believers wear. But it is in the Greek and Armenian +quarters, and among those poor Christians who were pulling figs, that +you see the beauties; and a man of a generous disposition may lose his +heart half-a-dozen times a day in Smyrna. There was the pretty maid at +work at a tambour-frame in an open porch, with an old duenna spinning +by her side, and a goat tied up to the railings of the little +court-garden; there was the nymph who came down the stair with the +pitcher on her head, and gazed with great calm eyes, as large and +stately as Juno’s; there was the gentle mother, bending over a queer +cradle, in which lay a small crying bundle of infancy. All these three +charmers were seen in a single street in the Armenian quarter, where +the house-doors are all open, and the women of the families sit under +the arches in the court. There was the fig-girl, beautiful beyond all +others, with an immense coil of deep black hair twisted round a head of +which Raphael was worthy to draw the outline and Titian to paint the +colour. I wonder the Sultan has not swept her off, or that the Persian +merchants, who come with silks and sweetmeats, have not kidnapped her +for the Shah of Tehran. + +We went to see the Persian merchants at their khan, and purchased some +silks there from a swarthy black-bearded man, with a conical cap of +lambswool. Is it not hard to think that silks bought of a man in a +lambswool cap, in a caravanserai, brought hither on the backs of +camels, should have been manufactured after all at Lyons? Others of our +party bought carpets, for which the town is famous; and there was one +who absolutely laid in a stock of real Smyrna figs; and purchased three +or four real Smyrna sponges for his carriage; so strong was his passion +for the genuine article. + +I wonder that no painter has given us familiar views of the East: not +processions, grand sultans, or magnificent landscapes; but faithful +transcripts of everyday Oriental life, such as each street will supply +to him. The camels afford endless motives, couched in the +market-places, lying by thousands in the camel-square, snorting and +bubbling after their manner, the sun blazing down on their backs, their +slaves and keepers lying behind them in the shade: and the Caravan +Bridge, above all, would afford a painter subjects for a dozen of +pictures. Over this Roman arch, which crosses the Meles river, all the +caravans pass on their entrance to the town. On one side, as we sat and +looked at it, was a great row of plane- trees; on the opposite bank, a +deep wood of tall cypresses—in the midst of which rose up innumerable +grey tombs, surmounted with the turbans of the defunct believers. +Beside the stream, the view was less gloomy. There was under the +plane-trees a little coffee- house, shaded by a trellis-work, covered +over with a vine, and ornamented with many rows of shining pots and +water-pipes, for which there was no use at noon-day now, in the time of +Ramazan. Hard by the coffee-house was a garden and a bubbling marble +fountain, and over the stream was a broken summer-house, to which +amateurs may ascend for the purpose of examining the river; and all +round the plane-trees plenty of stools for those who were inclined to +sit and drink sweet thick coffee, or cool lemonade made of fresh green +citrons. The master of the house, dressed in a white turban and light +blue pelisse, lolled under the coffee-house awning; the slave in white +with a crimson striped jacket, his face as black as ebony, brought us +pipes and lemonade again, and returned to his station at the +coffee-house, where he curled his black legs together, and began +singing out of his flat nose to the thrumming of a long guitar with +wire strings. The instrument was not bigger than a soup-ladle, with a +long straight handle, but its music pleased the performer; for his eyes +rolled shining about, and his head wagged, and he grinned with an +innocent intensity of enjoyment that did one good to look at. And there +was a friend to share his pleasure: a Turk dressed in scarlet, and +covered all over with daggers and pistols, sat leaning forward on his +little stool, rocking about, and grinning quite as eagerly as the black +minstrel. As he sang and we listened, figures of women bearing pitchers +went passing over the Roman bridge, which we saw between the large +trunks of the planes; or grey forms of camels were seen stalking across +it, the string preceded by the little donkey, who is always here their +long-eared conductor. + +These are very humble incidents of travel. Wherever the steamboat +touches the shore adventure retreats into the interior, and what is +called romance vanishes. It won’t bear the vulgar gaze; or rather the +light of common day puts it out, and it is only in the dark that it +shines at all. There is no cursing and insulting of Giaours now. If a +Cockney looks or behaves in a particularly ridiculous way, the little +Turks come out and laugh at him. A Londoner is no longer a spittoon for +true believers: and now that dark Hassan sits in his divan and drinks +champagne, and Selim has a French watch, and Zuleika perhaps takes +Morison’s pills, Byronism becomes absurd instead of sublime, and is +only a foolish expression of Cockney wonder. They still occasionally +beat a man for going into a mosque, but this is almost the only sign of +ferocious vitality left in the Turk of the Mediterranean coast, and +strangers may enter scores of mosques without molestation. The +paddle-wheel is the great conqueror. Wherever the captain cries “Stop +her!” Civilisation stops, and lands in the ship’s boat, and makes a +permanent acquaintance with the savages on shore. Whole hosts of +crusaders have passed and died, and butchered here in vain. But to +manufacture European iron into pikes and helmets was a waste of metal: +in the shape of piston-rods and furnace-pokers it is irresistible; and +I think an allegory might be made showing how much stronger commerce is +than chivalry, and finishing with a grand image of Mahomet’s crescent +being extinguished in Fulton’s boiler. + +This I thought was the moral of the day’s sights and adventures. We +pulled off to the steamer in the afternoon—the Inbat blowing fresh, and +setting all the craft in the gulf dancing over its blue waters. We were +presently under way again, the captain ordering his engines to work +only at half power, so that a French steamer which was quitting Smyrna +at the same time might come up with us, and fancy she could beat their +irresistible, “Tagus.” Vain hope! Just as the Frenchman neared us, the +“Tagus” shot out like an arrow, and the discomfited Frenchman went +behind. Though we all relished the joke exceedingly, there was a French +gentleman on board who did not seem to be by any means tickled with it; +but he had received papers at Smyrna, containing news of Marshal +Bugeaud’s victory at Isly, and had this land victory to set against our +harmless little triumph at sea. + +That night we rounded the island of Mitylene: and the next day the +coast of Troy was in sight, and the tomb of Achilles—a dismal- looking +mound that rises in a low dreary barren shore—less lively and not more +picturesque than the Scheldt or the mouth of the Thames. Then we passed +Tenedos and the forts and town at the mouth of the Dardanelles. The +weather was not too hot, the water as smooth as at Putney, and +everybody happy and excited at the thought of seeing Constantinople +to-morrow. We had music on board all the way from Smyrna. A German +commis-voyageur, with a guitar, who had passed unnoticed until that +time, produced his instrument about mid-day, and began to whistle +waltzes. He whistled so divinely that the ladies left their cabins, and +men laid down their books. He whistled a polka so bewitchingly that two +young Oxford men began whirling round the deck, and performed that +popular dance with much agility until they sank down tired. He still +continued an unabated whistling, and as nobody would dance, pulled off +his coat, produced a pair of castanets, and whistling a mazurka, +performed it with tremendous agility. His whistling made everybody gay +and happy— made those acquainted who had not spoken before, and +inspired such a feeling of hilarity in the ship, that that night, as we +floated over the Sea of Marmora, a general vote was expressed for +broiled bones and a regular supper-party. Punch was brewed, and +speeches were made, and, after a lapse of fifteen years, I heard the +“Old English Gentleman” and “Bright Chanticleer Proclaims the Morn,” +sung in such style that you would almost fancy the proctors must hear, +and send us all home. + + + + +CHAPTER VII +CONSTANTINOPLE + + +When we arose at sunrise to see the famous entry to Constantinople, we +found, in the place of the city and the sun, a bright white fog, which +hid both from sight, and which only disappeared as the vessel advanced +towards the Golden Horn. There the fog cleared off as it were by +flakes, and as you see gauze curtains lifted away, one by one, before a +great fairy scene at the theatre. This will give idea enough of the +fog; the difficulty is to describe the scene afterwards, which was in +truth the great fairy scene, than which it is impossible to conceive +anything more brilliant and magnificent. I can’t go to any more +romantic place than Drury Lane to draw my similes from—Drury Lane, such +as we used to see it in our youth, when to our sight the grand last +pictures of the melodrama or pantomime were as magnificent as any +objects of nature we have seen with maturer eyes. Well, the view of +Constantinople is as fine as any of Stanfield’s best theatrical +pictures, seen at the best period of youth, when fancy had all the +bloom on her—when all the heroines who danced before the scene appeared +as ravishing beauties, when there shone an unearthly splendour about +Baker and Diddear—and the sound of the bugles and fiddles, and the +cheerful clang of the cymbals, as the scene unrolled, and the gorgeous +procession meandered triumphantly through it—caused a thrill of +pleasure, and awakened an innocent fulness of sensual enjoyment that is +only given to boys. + +The above sentence contains the following propositions:- The enjoyments +of boyish fancy are the most intense and delicious in the world. +Stanfield’s panorama used to be the realisation of the most intense +youthful fancy. I puzzle my brains and find no better likeness for the +place. The view of Constantinople resembles the ne plus ultra of a +Stanfield diorama, with a glorious accompaniment of music, spangled +houris, warriors, and winding processions, feasting the eyes and the +soul with light, splendour, and harmony. If you were never in this way +during your youth ravished at the play-house, of course the whole +comparison is useless: and you have no idea, from this description, of +the effect which Constantinople produces on the mind. But if you were +never affected by a theatre, no words can work upon your fancy, and +typographical attempts to move it are of no use. For, suppose we +combine mosque, minaret, gold, cypress, water, blue, caiques, +seventy-four, Galata, Tophana, Ramazan, Backallum, and so forth, +together, in ever so many ways, your imagination will never be able to +depict a city out of them. Or, suppose I say the Mosque of St. Sophia +is four hundred and seventy-three feet in height, measuring from the +middle nail of the gilt crescent surmounting the dome to the ring in +the centre stone; the circle of the dome is one hundred and +twenty-three feet in diameter, the windows ninety-seven in number—and +all this may be true, for anything I know to the contrary: yet who is +to get an idea of St. Sophia from dates, proper names, and calculations +with a measuring-line? It can’t be done by giving the age and +measurement of all the buildings along the river, the names of all the +boatmen who ply on it. Has your fancy, which pooh-poohs a simile, faith +enough to build a city with a foot-rule? Enough said about descriptions +and similes (though whenever I am uncertain of one I am naturally most +anxious to fight for it): it is a scene not perhaps sublime, but +charming, magnificent, and cheerful beyond any I have ever seen—the +most superb combination of city and gardens, domes and shipping, hills +and water, with the healthiest breeze blowing over it, and above it the +brightest and most cheerful sky. + +It is proper, they say, to be disappointed on entering the town, or any +of the various quarters of it, because the houses are not so +magnificent on inspection and seen singly as they are when beheld en +masse from the waters. But why form expectations so lofty? If you see a +group of peasants picturesquely disposed at a fair, you don’t suppose +that they are all faultless beauties, or that the men’s coats have no +rags, and the women’s gowns are made of silk and velvet: the wild +ugliness of the interior of Constantinople or Pera has a charm of its +own, greatly more amusing than rows of red bricks or drab stones, +however symmetrical. With brick or stone they could never form those +fantastic ornaments, railings, balconies, roofs, galleries, which jut +in and out of the rugged houses of the city. As we went from Galata to +Pera up a steep hill, which newcomers ascend with some difficulty, but +which a porter, with a couple of hundredweight on his back, paces up +without turning a hair, I thought the wooden houses far from being +disagreeable objects, sights quite as surprising and striking as the +grand one we had just left. + +I do not know how the custom-house of His Highness is made to be a +profitable speculation. As I left the ship, a man pulled after my boat, +and asked for backsheesh, which was given him to the amount of about +twopence. He was a custom-house officer, but I doubt whether this sum +which he levied ever went to the revenue. + +I can fancy the scene about the quays somewhat to resemble the river of +London in olden times, before coal-smoke had darkened the whole city +with soot, and when, according to the old writers, there really was +bright weather. The fleets of caiques bustling along the shore, or +scudding over the blue water, are beautiful to look at: in Hollar’s +print London river is so studded over with wherry- boats, which bridges +and steamers have since destroyed. Here the caique is still in full +perfection: there are thirty thousand boats of the kind plying between +the cities; every boat is neat, and trimly carved and painted; and I +scarcely saw a man pulling in one of them that was not a fine specimen +of his race, brawny and brown, with an open chest and a handsome face. +They wear a thin shirt of exceedingly light cotton, which leaves their +fine brown limbs full play; and with a purple sea for a background, +every one of these dashing boats forms a brilliant and glittering +picture. Passengers squat in the inside of the boat; so that as it +passes you see little more than the heads of the true believers, with +their red fez and blue tassel, and that placid gravity of expression +which the sucking of a tobacco-pipe is sure to give to a man. + +The Bosphorus is enlivened by a multiplicity of other kinds of craft. +There are the dirty men-of-war’s boats of the Russians, with unwashed +mangy crews; the great ferry-boats carrying hundreds of passengers to +the villages; the melon-boats piled up with enormous golden fruit; His +Excellency the Pasha’s boat, with twelve men bending to their oars; and +His Highness’s own caique, with a head like a serpent, and +eight-and-twenty tugging oarsmen, that goes shooting by amidst the +thundering of the cannon. Ships and steamers, with black sides and +flaunting colours, are moored everywhere, showing their flags, Russian +and English, Austrian, American, and Greek; and along the quays country +ships from the Black Sea or the islands, with high carved poops and +bows, such as you see in the pictures of the shipping of the +seventeenth century. The vast groves and towers, domes and quays, tall +minarets and spired spreading mosques of the three cities, rise all +around in endless magnificence and variety, and render this +water-street a scene of such delightful liveliness and beauty, that one +never tires of looking at it. I lost a great number of the sights in +and round Constantinople through the beauty of this admirable scene: +but what are sights after all? and isn’t that the best sight which +makes you most happy? + +We were lodged at Pera at Misseri’s Hotel, the host of which has been +made famous ere this time by the excellent book “Eothen,”—a work for +which all the passengers on board our ship had been battling, and which +had charmed all—from our great statesman, our polished lawyer, our +young Oxonian, who sighed over certain passages that he feared were +wicked, down to the writer of this, who, after perusing it with +delight, laid it down with wonder, exclaiming, “Aut Diabolus aut”—a +book which has since (greatest miracle of all) excited a feeling of +warmth and admiration in the bosom of the god-like, impartial, stony +Athenaeum. Misseri, the faithful and chivalrous Tartar, is transformed +into the most quiet and gentlemanlike of landlords, a great deal more +gentlemanlike in manner and appearance than most of us who sat at his +table, and smoked cool pipes on his house-top, as we looked over the +hill and the Russian palace to the water, and the Seraglio gardens +shining in the blue. We confronted Misseri, “Eothen” in hand, and +found, on examining him, that it WAS “aut Diabolus aut amicus”—but the +name is a secret; I will never breathe it, though I am dying to tell +it. + +The last good description of a Turkish bath, I think, was Lady Mary +Wortley Montagu’s—which voluptuous picture must have been painted at +least a hundred and thirty years ago; so that another sketch may be +attempted by a humbler artist in a different manner. The Turkish bath +is certainly a novel sensation to an Englishman, and may be set down as +a most queer and surprising event of his life. I made the +valet-de-place or dragoman (it is rather a fine thing to have a +dragoman in one’s service) conduct me forthwith to the best appointed +hummums in the neighbourhood; and we walked to a house at Tophana, and +into a spacious hall lighted from above, which is the cooling-room of +the bath. + +The spacious hall has a large fountain in the midst, a painted gallery +running round it; and many ropes stretched from one gallery to another, +ornamented with profuse draperies of towels and blue cloths, for the +use of the frequenters of the place. All round the room and the +galleries were matted inclosures, fitted with numerous neat beds and +cushions for reposing on, where lay a dozen of true believers smoking, +or sleeping, or in the happy half-dozing state. I was led up to one of +these beds, to rather a retired corner, in consideration of my modesty; +and to the next bed presently came a dancing dervish, who forthwith +began to prepare for the bath. + +When the dancing dervish had taken off his yellow sugar-loaf cap, his +gown, shawl, &c., he was arrayed in two large blue cloths; a white one +being thrown over his shoulders, and another in the shape of a turban +plaited neatly round his head; the garments of which he divested +himself were folded up in another linen, and neatly put by. I beg leave +to state I was treated in precisely the same manner as the dancing +dervish. + +The reverend gentleman then put on a pair of wooden pattens, which +elevated him about six inches from the ground; and walked down the +stairs, and paddled across the moist marble floor of the hall, and in +at a little door, by the which also Titmarsh entered. But I had none of +the professional agility of the dancing dervish; I staggered about very +ludicrously upon the high wooden pattens; and should have been down on +my nose several times, had not the dragoman and the master of the bath +supported me down the stairs and across the hall. Dressed in three +large cotton napkins, with a white turban round my head, I thought of +Pall Mall with a sort of despair. I passed the little door, it was +closed behind me—I was in the dark—I couldn’t speak the language—in a +white turban. Mon Dieu! what was going to happen? + +The dark room was the tepidarium, a moist oozing arched den, with a +light faintly streaming from an orifice in the domed ceiling. Yells of +frantic laughter and song came booming and clanging through the echoing +arches, the doors clapped to with loud reverberations. It was the +laughter of the followers of Mahound, rollicking and taking their +pleasure in the public bath. I could not go into that place: I swore I +would not; they promised me a private room, and the dragoman left me. +My agony at parting from that Christian cannot be described. + +When you get into the sudarium, or hot room, your first sensations only +occur about half a minute after entrance, when you feel that you are +choking. I found myself in that state, seated on a marble slab; the +bath man was gone; he had taken away the cotton turban and shoulder +shawl: I saw I was in a narrow room of marble, with a vaulted roof, and +a fountain of warm and cold water; the atmosphere was in a steam, the +choking sensation went off, and I felt a sort of pleasure presently in +a soft boiling simmer, which, no doubt, potatoes feel when they are +steaming. You are left in this state for about ten minutes: it is warm +certainly, but odd and pleasant, and disposes the mind to reverie. + +But let any delicate mind in Baker Street fancy my horror when, on +looking up out of this reverie, I saw a great brown wretch extended +before me, only half dressed, standing on pattens, and exaggerated by +them and the steam until he looked like an ogre, grinning in the most +horrible way, and waving his arm, on which was a horsehair glove. He +spoke, in his unknown nasal jargon, words which echoed through the +arched room; his eyes seemed astonishingly large and bright, his ears +stuck out, and his head was all shaved, except a bristling top-knot, +which gave it a demoniac fierceness. + +This description, I feel, is growing too frightful; ladies who read it +will be going into hysterics, or saying, “Well, upon my word, this is +the most singular, the most extraordinary kind of language. Jane, my +love, you will not read that odious book—” and so I will be brief. This +grinning man belabours the patient violently with the horse-brush. When +he has completed the horsehair part, and you lie expiring under a +squirting fountain of warm water, and fancying all is done, he +reappears with a large brass basin, containing a quantity of lather, in +the midst of which is something like old Miss MacWhirter’s flaxen wig +that she is so proud of, and that we have all laughed at. Just as you +are going to remonstrate, the thing like the wig is dashed into your +face and eyes, covered over with soap, and for five minutes you are +drowned in lather: you can’t see, the suds are frothing over your +eye-balls; you can’t hear, the soap is whizzing into your ears; can’t +gasp for breath, Miss MacWhirter’s wig is down your throat with half a +pailful of suds in an instant—you are all soap. Wicked children in +former days have jeered you, exclaiming, “How are you off for soap?” +You little knew what saponacity was till you entered a Turkish bath. + +When the whole operation is concluded, you are led—with what heartfelt +joy I need not say—softly back to the cooling-room, having been robed +in shawls and turbans as before. You are laid gently on the reposing +bed; somebody brings a narghile, which tastes as tobacco must taste in +Mahomet’s Paradise; a cool sweet dreamy languor takes possession of the +purified frame; and half-an- hour of such delicious laziness is spent +over the pipe as is unknown in Europe, where vulgar prejudice has most +shamefully maligned indolence—calls it foul names, such as the father +of all evil, and the like; in fact, does not know how to educate +idleness as those honest Turks do, and the fruit which, when properly +cultivated, it bears. + +The after-bath state is the most delightful condition of laziness I +ever knew, and I tried it wherever we went afterwards on our little +tour. At Smyrna the whole business was much inferior to the method +employed in the capital. At Cairo, after the soap, you are plunged into +a sort of stone coffin, full of water which is all but boiling. This +has its charms; but I could not relish the Egyptian shampooing. A +hideous old blind man (but very dexterous in his art) tried to break my +back and dislocate my shoulders, but I could not see the pleasure of +the practice; and another fellow began tickling the soles of my feet, +but I rewarded him with a kick that sent him off the bench. The pure +idleness is the best, and I shall never enjoy such in Europe again. + +Victor Hugo, in his famous travels on the Rhine, visiting Cologne, +gives a learned account of what he DIDN’T see there. I have a +remarkable catalogue of similar objects at Constantinople. I didn’t see +the dancing dervishes, it was Ramazan; nor the howling dervishes at +Scutari, it was Ramazan; nor the interior of St. Sophia, nor the +women’s apartment of the Seraglio, nor the fashionable promenade at the +Sweet Waters, always because it was Ramazan; during which period the +dervishes dance and howl but rarely, their legs and lungs being unequal +to much exertion during a fast of fifteen hours. On account of the same +holy season, the Royal palaces and mosques are shut; and though the +Valley of the Sweet Waters is there, no one goes to walk; the people +remaining asleep all day, and passing the night in feasting and +carousing. The minarets are illuminated at this season; even the +humblest mosque at Jerusalem, or Jaffa, mounted a few circles of dingy +lamps; those of the capital were handsomely lighted with many festoons +of lamps, which had a fine effect from the water. I need not mention +other and constant illuminations of the city, which innumerable +travellers have described—I mean the fires. There were three in Pera +during our eight days’ stay there; but they did not last long enough to +bring the Sultan out of bed to come and lend his aid. Mr. Hobhouse +(quoted in the “Guide-book”) says, if a fire lasts an hour, the Sultan +is bound to attend it in person; and that people having petitions to +present, have often set houses on fire for the purpose of forcing out +this Royal trump. The Sultan can’t lead a very “jolly life,” if this +rule be universal. Fancy His Highness, in the midst of his moon-faced +beauties, handkerchief in hand, and obliged to tie it round his face, +and go out of his warm harem at midnight at the cursed cry of “Yang en +Var!” + +We saw His Highness in the midst of his people and their petitions, +when he came to the mosque at Tophana; not the largest, but one of the +most picturesque of the public buildings of the city. The streets were +crowded with people watching for the august arrival, and lined with the +squat military in their bastard European costume; the sturdy police, +with bandeliers and brown surtouts, keeping order, driving off the +faithful from the railings of the Esplanade through which their Emperor +was to pass, and only admitting (with a very unjust partiality, I +thought) us Europeans into that reserved space. Before the august +arrival, numerous officers collected, colonels and pashas went by with +their attendant running footmen; the most active, insolent, and hideous +of these great men, as I thought, being His Highness’s black eunuchs, +who went prancing through the crowd, which separated before them with +every sign of respect. + +The common women were assembled by many hundreds: the yakmac, a muslin +chin-cloth which they wear, makes almost every face look the same; but +the eyes and noses of these beauties are generally visible, and, for +the most part, both these features are good. The jolly negresses wear +the same white veil, but they are by no means so particular about +hiding the charms of their good-natured black faces, and they let the +cloth blow about as it lists, and grin unconfined. Wherever we went the +negroes seemed happy. They have the organ of child-loving: little +creatures were always prattling on their shoulders, queer little things +in night gowns of yellow dimity, with great flowers, and pink or red or +yellow shawls, with great eyes glistening underneath. Of such the black +women seemed always the happy guardians. I saw one at a fountain, +holding one child in her arms, and giving another a drink—a ragged +little beggar—a sweet and touching picture of a black charity. + +I am almost forgetting His Highness the Sultan. About a hundred guns +were fired off at clumsy intervals from the Esplanade facing the +Bosphorus, warning us that the monarch had set off from his Summer +Palace, and was on the way to his grand canoe. At last that vessel made +its appearance; the band struck up his favourite air; his caparisoned +horse was led down to the shore to receive him; the eunuchs, fat +pashas, colonels and officers of state gathering round as the Commander +of the Faithful mounted. I had the indescribable happiness of seeing +him at a very short distance. The Padishah, or Father of all the +Sovereigns on earth, has not that majestic air which some sovereigns +possess, and which makes the beholder’s eyes wink, and his knees +tremble under him: he has a black beard, and a handsome well-bred face, +of a French cast; he looks like a young French roue worn out by +debauch; his eyes bright, with black rings round them; his cheeks pale +and hollow. He was lolling on his horse as if he could hardly hold +himself on the saddle: or as if his cloak, fastened with a blazing +diamond clasp on his breast, and falling over his horse’s tail, pulled +him back. But the handsome sallow face of the Refuge of the World +looked decidedly interesting and intellectual. I have seen many a young +Don Juan at Paris, behind a counter, with such a beard and countenance; +the flame of passion still burning in his hollow eyes, while on his +damp brow was stamped the fatal mark of premature decay. The man we saw +cannot live many summers. Women and wine are said to have brought the +Zilullah to this state; and it is whispered by the dragomans, or +laquais-de-place (from whom travellers at Constantinople generally get +their political information), that the Sultan’s mother and his +ministers conspire to keep him plunged in sensuality, that they may +govern the kingdom according to their own fancies. Mr. Urquhart, I am +sure, thinks that Lord Palmerston has something to do with the +business, and drugs the Sultan’s champagne for the benefit of Russia. + +As the Pontiff of Mussulmans passed into the mosques a shower of +petitions was flung from the steps where the crowd was collected, and +over the heads of the gendarmes in brown. A general cry, as for +justice, rose up; and one old ragged woman came forward and burst +through the throng, howling, and flinging about her lean arms, and +baring her old shrunken breast. I never saw a finer action of tragic +woo, or heard sounds more pitiful than those old passionate groans of +hers. What was your prayer, poor old wretched soul? The gendarmes +hemmed her round, and hustled her away, but rather kindly. The Padishah +went on quite impassible—the picture of debauch and ennui. + +I like pointing morals, and inventing for myself cheap consolations, to +reconcile me to that state of life into which it has pleased Heaven to +call me; and as the Light of the World disappeared round the corner, I +reasoned pleasantly with myself about His Highness, and enjoyed that +secret selfish satisfaction a man has, who sees he is better off than +his neighbour. “Michael Angelo,” I said, “you are still (by courtesy) +young: if you had five hundred thousand a year, and were a great +prince, I would lay a wager that men would discover in you a +magnificent courtesy of demeanour, and a majestic presence that only +belongs to the sovereigns of the world. If you had such an income, you +think you could spend it with splendour: distributing genial +hospitalities, kindly alms, soothing misery, bidding humility be of +good heart, rewarding desert. If you had such means of purchasing +pleasure, you think, you rogue, you could relish it with gusto. But +fancy being brought to the condition of the poor Light of the Universe +yonder; and reconcile yourself with the idea that you are only a +farthing rushlight. The cries of the poor widow fall as dead upon him +as the smiles of the brightest eyes out of Georgia. He can’t stir +abroad but those abominable cannon begin roaring and deafening his +ears. He can’t see the world but over the shoulders of a row of fat +pashas, and eunuchs, with their infernal ugliness. His ears can never +be regaled with a word of truth, or blessed with an honest laugh. The +only privilege of manhood left to him, he enjoys but for a month in the +year, at this time of Ramazan, when he is forced to fast for fifteen +hours; and, by consequence, has the blessing of feeling hungry.” Sunset +during Lent appears to be his single moment of pleasure; they say the +poor fellow is ravenous by that time, and as the gun fires the +dish-covers are taken off, so that for five minutes a day he lives and +is happy over pillau, like another mortal. + +And yet, when floating by the Summer Palace, a barbaric edifice of wood +and marble, with gilded suns blazing over the porticoes, and all sorts +of strange ornaments and trophies figuring on the gates and +railings—when we passed a long row of barred and filigreed windows, +looking on the water—when we were told that those were the apartments +of His Highness’s ladies, and actually heard them whispering and +laughing behind the bars—a strange feeling of curiosity came over some +ill-regulated minds—just to have one peep, one look at all those +wondrous beauties, singing to the dulcimers, paddling in the fountains, +dancing in the marble halls, or lolling on the golden cushions, as the +gaudy black slaves brought pipes and coffee. This tumultuous movement +was calmed by thinking of that dreadful statement of travellers, that +in one of the most elegant halls there is a trap-door, on peeping below +which you may see the Bosphorus running underneath, into which some +luckless beauty is plunged occasionally, and the trap-door is shut, and +the dancing and the singing, and the smoking and the laughing go on as +before. They say it is death to pick up any of the sacks thereabouts, +if a stray one should float by you. There were none any day when I +passed, AT LEAST, ON THE SURFACE OF THE WATER. + +It has been rather a fashion of our travellers to apologise for Turkish +life, of late, and paint glowing agreeable pictures of many of its +institutions. The celebrated author of “Palm-Leaves” (his name is +famous under the date-trees of the Nile, and uttered with respect +beneath the tents of the Bedaween) has touchingly described Ibrahim +Pasha’s paternal fondness, who cut off a black slave’s head for having +dropped and maimed one of his children; and has penned a melodious +panegyric of “The Harem,” and of the fond and beautiful duties of the +inmates of that place of love, obedience, and seclusion. I saw, at the +mausoleum of the late Sultan Mahmoud’s family, a good subject for a +Ghazul, in the true new Oriental manner. + +These Royal burial-places are the resort of the pious Moslems. Lamps +are kept burning there; and in the antechambers, copies of the Koran +are provided for the use of believers; and you never pass these +cemeteries but you see Turks washing at the cisterns, previous to +entering for prayer, or squatted on the benches, chanting passages from +the sacred volume. Christians, I believe, are not admitted, but may +look through the bars, and see the coffins of the defunct monarchs and +children of the Royal race. Each lies in his narrow sarcophagus, which +is commonly flanked by huge candles, and covered with a rich +embroidered pall. At the head of each coffin rises a slab, with a +gilded inscription; for the princesses, the slab is simple, not unlike +our own monumental stones. The headstones of the tombs of the defunct +princes are decorated with a turban, or, since the introduction of the +latter article of dress, with the red fez. That of Mahmoud is decorated +with the imperial aigrette. + +In this dismal but splendid museum, I remarked two little tombs with +little red fezzes, very small, and for very young heads evidently, +which were lying under the little embroidered palls of state. I forget +whether they had candles too; but their little flame of life was soon +extinguished, and there was no need of many pounds of wax to typify it. +These were the tombs of Mahmoud’s grandsons, nephews of the present +Light of the Universe, and children of his sister, the wife of Halil +Pasha. Little children die in all ways: these of the much-maligned +Mahometan Royal race perished by the bowstring. Sultan Mahmoud (may he +rest in glory!) strangled the one; but, having some spark of human +feeling, was so moved by the wretchedness and agony of the poor +bereaved mother, his daughter, that his Royal heart relented towards +her, and he promised that, should she ever have another child, it +should be allowed to live. He died; and Abdul Medjid (may his name be +blessed!), the debauched young man whom we just saw riding to the +mosque, succeeded. His sister, whom he is said to have loved, became +again a mother, and had a son. But she relied upon her father’s word +and her august brother’s love, and hoped that this little one should be +spared. The same accursed hand tore this infant out of its mother’s +bosom, and killed it. The poor woman’s heart broke outright at this +second calamity, and she died. But on her death-bed she sent for her +brother, rebuked him as a perjurer and an assassin, and expired calling +down the divine justice on his head. She lies now by the side of the +two little fezzes. + +Now I say this would be a fine subject for an Oriental poem. The +details are dramatic and noble, and could be grandly touched by a fine +artist. If the mother had borne a daughter, the child would have been +safe; that perplexity might be pathetically depicted as agitating the +bosom of the young wife about to become a mother. A son is born: you +can see her despair and the pitiful look she casts on the child, and +the way in which she hugs it every time the curtains of her door are +removed. The Sultan hesitated probably; he allowed the infant to live +for six weeks. He could not bring his Royal soul to inflict pain. He +yields at last; he is a martyr- -to be pitied, not to be blamed. If he +melts at his daughter’s agony, he is a man and a father. There are men +and fathers too in the much-maligned Orient. + +Then comes the second act of the tragedy. The new hopes, the fond +yearnings, the terrified misgivings, the timid belief, and weak +confidence; the child that is born—and dies smiling prettily—and the +mother’s heart is rent so, that it can love, or hope, or suffer no +more. Allah is God! She sleeps by the little fezzes. Hark! the guns are +booming over the water, and His Highness is coming from his prayers. + +After the murder of that little child, it seems to me one can never +look with anything but horror upon the butcherly Herod who ordered it. +The death of the seventy thousand Janissaries ascends to historic +dignity, and takes rank as war. But a great Prince and Light of the +Universe, who procures abortions and throttles little babies, dwindles +away into such a frightful insignificance of crime, that those may +respect him who will. I pity their Excellencies the Ambassadors, who +are obliged to smirk and cringe to such a rascal. To do the Turks +justice—and two days’ walk in Constantinople will settle this fact as +well as a year’s residence in the city—the people do not seem in the +least animated by this Herodian spirit. I never saw more kindness to +children than among all classes, more fathers walking about with little +solemn Mahometans in red caps and big trousers, more business going on +than in the toy quarter, and in the Atmeidan. Although you may see +there the Thebaic stone set up by the Emperor Theodosius, and the +bronze column of serpents which Murray says was brought from Delphi, +but which my guide informed me was the very one exhibited by Moses in +the wilderness, yet I found the examination of these antiquities much +less pleasant than to look at the many troops of children assembled on +the plain to play; and to watch them as they were dragged about in +little queer arobas, or painted carriages, which are there kept for +hire. I have a picture of one of them now in my eyes: a little green +oval machine, with flowers rudely painted round the window, out of +which two smiling heads are peeping, the pictures of happiness. An old, +good-humoured, grey- bearded Turk is tugging the cart; and behind it +walks a lady in a yakmac and yellow slippers, and a black female slave, +grinning as usual, towards whom the little coach-riders are looking. A +small sturdy barefooted Mussulman is examining the cart with some +feelings of envy: he is too poor to purchase a ride for himself and the +round-faced puppy-dog, which he is hugging in his arms as young ladies +in our country do dolls. + +All the neighbourhood of the Atmeidan is exceedingly picturesque— the +mosque court and cloister, where the Persians have their stalls of +sweetmeats and tobacco; a superb sycamore-tree grows in the middle of +this, overshadowing an aromatic fountain; great flocks of pigeons are +settling in corners of the cloister, and barley is sold at the gates, +with which the good-natured people feed them. From the Atmeidan you +have a fine view of St. Sophia: and here stands a mosque which struck +me as being much more picturesque and sumptuous—the Mosque of Sultan +Achmed, with its six gleaming white minarets and its beautiful courts +and trees. Any infidels may enter the court without molestation, and, +looking through the barred windows of the mosque, have a view of its +airy and spacious interior. A small audience of women was collected +there when I looked in, squatted on the mats, and listening to a +preacher, who was walking among them, and speaking with great energy. +My dragoman interpreted to me the sense of a few words of his sermon: +he was warning them of the danger of gadding about to public places, +and of the immorality of too much talking; and, I dare say, we might +have had more valuable information from him regarding the follies of +womankind, had not a tall Turk clapped my interpreter on the shoulder, +and pointed him to be off. + +Although the ladies are veiled, and muffled with the ugliest dresses in +the world, yet it appears their modesty is alarmed in spite of all the +coverings which they wear. One day, in the bazaar, a fat old body, with +diamond rings on her fingers, that were tinged with henne of a logwood +colour, came to the shop where I was purchasing slippers, with her son, +a young Aga of six years of age, dressed in a braided frock-coat, with +a huge tassel to his fez, exceeding fat, and of a most solemn +demeanour. The young Aga came for a pair of shoes, and his contortions +were so delightful as he tried them, that I remained looking on with +great pleasure, wishing for Leech to be at hand to sketch his lordship +and his fat mamma, who sat on the counter. That lady fancied I was +looking at her, though, as far as I could see, she had the figure and +complexion of a roly-poly pudding; and so, with quite a premature +bashfulness, she sent me a message by the shoemaker, ordering me to +walk away if I had made my purchases, for that ladies of her rank did +not choose to be stared at by strangers; and I was obliged to take my +leave, though with sincere regret, for the little lord had just +squeezed himself into an attitude than which I never saw anything more +ludicrous in General Tom Thumb. When the ladies of the Seraglio come to +that bazaar with their cortege of infernal black eunuchs, strangers are +told to move on briskly. I saw a bevy of about eight of these, with +their aides-de-camp; but they were wrapped up, and looked just as +vulgar and ugly as the other women, and were not, I suppose, of the +most beautiful sort. The poor devils are allowed to come out, +half-a-dozen times in the year, to spend their little wretched +allowance of pocket-money in purchasing trinkets and tobacco; all the +rest of the time they pursue the beautiful duties of their existence in +the walls of the sacred harem. + +Though strangers are not allowed to see the interior of the cage in +which these birds of Paradise are confined, yet many parts of the +Seraglio are free to the curiosity of visitors, who choose to drop a +backsheesh here and there. I landed one morning at the Seraglio point +from Galata, close by an ancient pleasure-house of the defunct Sultan; +a vast broad-brimmed pavilion, that looks agreeable enough to be a +dancing room for ghosts now: there is another summer-house, the +Guide-book cheerfully says, whither the Sultan goes to sport with his +women and mutes. A regiment of infantry, with their music at their +head, were marching to exercise in the outer grounds of the Seraglio; +and we followed them, and had an opportunity of seeing their +evolutions, and hearing their bands, upon a fine green plain under the +Seraglio walls, where stands one solitary column, erected in memory of +some triumph of some Byzantian emperor. + +There were three battalions of the Turkish infantry, exercising here; +and they seemed to perform their evolutions in a very satisfactory +manner: that is, they fired all together, and charged and halted in +very straight lines, and bit off imaginary cartridge- tops with great +fierceness and regularity, and made all their ramrods ring to measure, +just like so many Christians. The men looked small, young, clumsy, and +ill-built; uncomfortable in their shabby European clothes; and about +the legs, especially, seemed exceedingly weak and ill-formed. Some +score of military invalids were lolling in the sunshine, about a +fountain and a marble summer- house that stand on the ground, watching +their comrades’ manoeuvres (as if they could never have enough of that +delightful pastime); and these sick were much better cared for than +their healthy companions. Each man had two dressing-gowns, one of white +cotton, and an outer wrapper of warm brown woollen. Their heads were +accommodated with wadded cotton nightcaps; and it seemed to me, from +their condition and from the excellent character of the military +hospitals, that it would be much more wholesome to be ill than to be +well in the Turkish service. + +Facing this green esplanade, and the Bosphorus shining beyond it, rise +the great walls of the outer Seraglio Gardens: huge masses of ancient +masonry, over which peep the roofs of numerous kiosks and outhouses, +amongst thick evergreens, planted so as to hide the beautiful +frequenters of the place from the prying eyes and telescopes. We could +not catch a glance of a single figure moving in these great +pleasure-grounds. The road winds round the walls; and the outer park, +which is likewise planted with trees, and diversified by garden-plots +and cottages, had more the air of the outbuildings of a homely English +park, than of a palace which we must all have imagined to be the most +stately in the world. The most commonplace water-carts were passing +here and there; roads were being repaired in the Macadamite manner; and +carpenters were mending the park-palings, just as they do in Hampshire. +The next thing you might fancy would be the Sultan walking out with a +spud and a couple of dogs, on the way to meet the post-bag and the +Saint James’s Chronicle. + +The palace is no palace at all. It is a great town of pavilions, built +without order, here and there, according to the fancy of succeeding +Lights of the Universe, or their favourites. The only row of domes +which looked particularly regular or stately, were the kitchens. As you +examined the buildings they had a ruinous dilapidated look: they are +not furnished, it is said, with particular splendour,—not a bit more +elegantly than Miss Jones’s seminary for young ladies, which we may be +sure is much more comfortable than the extensive establishment of His +Highness Abdul Medjid. + +In the little stable I thought to see some marks of Royal magnificence, +and some horses worthy of the king of all kings. But the Sultan is said +to be a very timid horseman: the animal that is always kept saddled for +him did not look to be worth twenty pounds; and the rest of the horses +in the shabby dirty stalls were small, ill-kept, common-looking brutes. +You might see better, it seemed to me, at a country inn stable on any +market-day. + +The kitchens are the most sublime part of the Seraglio. There are nine +of these great halls, for all ranks, from His Highness downwards, where +many hecatombs are roasted daily, according to the accounts, and where +cooking goes on with a savage Homeric grandeur. Chimneys are despised +in these primitive halls; so that the roofs are black with the smoke of +hundreds of furnaces, which escapes through apertures in the domes +above. These, too, give the chief light in the rooms, which streams +downwards, and thickens and mingles with the smoke, and so murkily +lights up hundreds of swarthy figures busy about the spits and the +cauldrons. Close to the door by which we entered they were making +pastry for the sultanas; and the chief pastrycook, who knew my guide, +invited us courteously to see the process, and partake of the +delicacies prepared for those charming lips. How those sweet lips must +shine after eating these puffs! First, huge sheets of dough are rolled +out till the paste is about as thin as silver paper: then an artist +forms the dough-muslin into a sort of drapery, curling it round and +round in many fanciful and pretty shapes, until it is all got into the +circumference of a round metal tray in which it is baked. Then the cake +is drenched in grease most profusely; and, finally, a quantity of syrup +is poured over it, when the delectable mixture is complete. The +moon-faced ones are said to devour immense quantities of this wholesome +food; and, in fact, are eating grease and sweetmeats from morning till +night. I don’t like to think what the consequences may be, or allude to +the agonies which the delicate creatures must inevitably suffer. + +The good-natured chief pastrycook filled a copper basin with greasy +puffs; and, dipping a dubious ladle into a large cauldron, containing +several gallons of syrup, poured a liberal portion over the cakes, and +invited us to eat. One of the tarts was quite enough for me: and I +excused myself on the plea of ill-health from imbibing any more grease +and sugar. But my companion, the dragoman, finished some forty puffs in +a twinkling. They slipped down his opened jaws as the sausages do down +clowns’ throats in a pantomime. His moustaches shone with grease, and +it dripped down his beard and fingers. We thanked the smiling chief +pastrycook, and rewarded him handsomely for the tarts. It is something +to have eaten of the dainties prepared for the ladies of the harem; but +I think Mr. Cockle ought to get the names of the chief sultanas among +the exalted patrons of his antibilious pills. + +From the kitchens we passed into the second court of the Seraglio, +beyond which is death. The Guide-book only hints at the dangers which +would befall a stranger caught prying in the mysterious FIRST court of +the palace. I have read “Bluebeard,” and don’t care for peeping into +forbidden doors; so that the second court was quite enough for me; the +pleasure of beholding it being heightened, as it were, by the notion of +the invisible danger sitting next door, with uplifted scimitar ready to +fall on you—present though not seen. + +A cloister runs along one side of this court; opposite is the hall of +the divan, “large but low, covered with lead, and gilt, after the +Moorish manner, plain enough.” The Grand Vizier sits in this place, and +the ambassadors used to wait here, and be conducted hence on horseback, +attired with robes of honour. But the ceremony is now, I believe, +discontinued; the English envoy, at any rate, is not allowed to receive +any backsheesh, and goes away as he came, in the habit of his own +nation. On the right is a door leading into the interior of the +Seraglio; NONE PASS THROUGH IT BUT SUCH AS ARE SENT FOR, the Guide-book +says: it is impossible to top the terror of that description. + +About this door lads and servants were lolling, ichoglans and pages, +with lazy looks and shabby dresses; and among them, sunning himself +sulkily on a bench, a poor old fat, wrinkled, dismal white eunuch, with +little fat white hands, and a great head sunk into his chest, and two +sprawling little legs that seemed incapable to hold up his bloated old +body. He squeaked out some surly reply to my friend the dragoman, who, +softened and sweetened by the tarts he had just been devouring, was, no +doubt, anxious to be polite: and the poor worthy fellow walked away +rather crestfallen at this return of his salutation, and hastened me +out of the place. + +The palace of the Seraglio, the cloister with marble pillars, the hall +of the ambassadors, the impenetrable gate guarded by eunuchs and +ichoglans, have a romantic look in print; but not so in reality. Most +of the marble is wood, almost all the gilding is faded, the guards are +shabby, the foolish perspectives painted on the walls are half cracked +off. The place looks like Vauxhall in the daytime. + +We passed out of the second court under THE SUBLIME PORTE—which is like +a fortified gate of a German town of the middle ages—into the outer +court, round which are public offices, hospitals, and dwellings of the +multifarious servants of the palace. This place is very wide and +picturesque: there is a pretty church of Byzantine architecture at the +further end; and in the midst of the court a magnificent plane-tree, of +prodigious dimensions and fabulous age according to the guides; St. +Sophia towers in the further distance: and from here, perhaps, is the +best view of its light swelling domes and beautiful proportions. The +Porte itself, too, forms an excellent subject for the sketcher, if the +officers of the court will permit him to design it. I made the attempt, +and a couple of Turkish beadles looked on very good-naturedly for some +time at the progress of the drawing; but a good number of other +spectators speedily joined them, and made a crowd, which is not +permitted, it would seem, in the Seraglio; so I was told to pack up my +portfolio, and remove the cause of the disturbance, and lost my drawing +of the Ottoman Porte. + +I don’t think I have anything more to say about the city which has not +been much better told by graver travellers. I, with them, could see +(perhaps it was the preaching of the politicians that warned me of the +fact) that we are looking on at the last days of an empire; and heard +many stories of weakness, disorder, and oppression. I even saw a +Turkish lady drive up to Sultan Achmet’s mosque IN A BROUGHAM. Is not +that a subject to moralise upon? And might one not draw endless +conclusions from it, that the knell of the Turkish dominion is rung; +that the European spirit and institutions once admitted can never be +rooted out again; and that the scepticism prevalent amongst the higher +orders must descend ere very long to the lower; and the cry of the +muezzin from the mosque become a mere ceremony? + +But as I only stayed eight days in this place, and knew not a syllable +of the language, perhaps it is as well to pretermit any disquisitions +about the spirit of the people. I can only say that they looked to be +very good-natured, handsome, and lazy; that the women’s yellow slippers +are very ugly; that the kabobs at the shop hard by the Rope Bazaar are +very hot and good; and that at the Armenian cookshops they serve you +delicious fish, and a stout raisin wine of no small merit. There came +in, as we sat and dined there at sunset, a good old Turk, who called +for a penny fish, and sat down under a tree very humbly, and ate it +with his own bread. We made that jolly old Mussulman happy with a quart +of the raisin wine; and his eyes twinkled with every fresh glass, and +he wiped his old beard delighted, and talked and chirped a good deal, +and, I dare say, told us the whole state of the empire. He was the only +Mussulman with whom I attained any degree of intimacy during my stay in +Constantinople; and you will see that, for obvious reasons, I cannot +divulge the particulars of our conversation. + +“You have nothing to say, and you own it,” says somebody: “then why +write?” That question perhaps (between ourselves) I have put likewise; +and yet, my dear sir, there are SOME things worth remembering even in +this brief letter: that woman in the brougham is an idea of +significance: that comparison of the Seraglio to Vauxhall in the +daytime is a true and real one; from both of which your own great soul +and ingenious philosophic spirit may draw conclusions, that I myself +have modestly forborne to press. You are too clever to require a moral +to be tacked to all the fables you read, as is done for children in the +spelling-books; else I would tell you that the government of the +Ottoman Porte seems to be as rotten, as wrinkled, and as feeble as the +old eunuch I saw crawling about it in the sun; that when the lady drove +up in a brougham to Sultan Achmet, I felt that the schoolmaster was +really abroad; and that the crescent will go out before that luminary, +as meekly as the moon does before the sun. + + + + +CHAPTER VIII +RHODES + + +The sailing of a vessel direct for Jaffa brought a great number of +passengers together, and our decks were covered with Christian, Jew, +and Heathen. In the cabin we were Poles and Russians, Frenchmen, +Germans, Spaniards, and Greeks; on the deck were squatted several +little colonies of people of different race and persuasion. There was a +Greek Papa, a noble figure with a flowing and venerable white beard, +who had been living on bread-and-water for I don’t know how many years, +in order to save a little money to make the pilgrimage to Jerusalem. +There were several families of Jewish Rabbis, who celebrated their +“feast of tabernacles” on board; their chief men performing worship +twice or thrice a day, dressed in their pontifical habits, and bound +with phylacteries: and there were Turks, who had their own ceremonies +and usages, and wisely kept aloof from their neighbours of Israel. + +The dirt of these children of captivity exceeds all possibility of +description; the profusion of stinks which they raised, the grease of +their venerable garments and faces, the horrible messes cooked in the +filthy pots, and devoured with the nasty fingers, the squalor of mats, +pots, old bedding, and foul carpets of our Hebrew friends, could hardly +be painted by Swift in his dirtiest mood, and cannot be, of course, +attempted by my timid and genteel pen. What would they say in Baker +Street to some sights with which our new friends favoured us? What +would your ladyship have said if you had seen the interesting Greek nun +combing her hair over the cabin— combing it with the natural fingers, +and, averse to slaughter, flinging the delicate little intruders, which +she found in the course of her investigation, gently into the great +cabin? Our attention was a good deal occupied in watching the strange +ways and customs of the various comrades of ours. + +The Jews were refugees from Poland, going to lay their bones to rest in +the valley of Jehoshaphat, and performing with exceeding rigour the +offices of their religion. At morning and evening you were sure to see +the chiefs of the families, arrayed in white robes, bowing over their +books, at prayer. Once a week, on the eve before the Sabbath, there was +a general washing in Jewry, which sufficed until the ensuing Friday. +The men wore long gowns and caps of fur, or else broad-brimmed hats, +or, in service time, bound on their heads little iron boxes, with the +sacred name engraved on them. Among the lads there were some beautiful +faces; and among the women your humble servant discovered one who was a +perfect rosebud of beauty when first emerging from her Friday’s toilet, +and for a day or two afterwards, until each succeeding day’s smut +darkened those fresh and delicate cheeks of hers. We had some very +rough weather in the course of the passage from Constantinople to +Jaffa, and the sea washed over and over our Israelitish friends and +their baggages and bundles; but though they were said to be rich, they +would not afford to pay for cabin shelter. One father of a family, +finding his progeny half drowned in a squall, vowed he WOULD pay for a +cabin; but the weather was somewhat finer the next day, and he could +not squeeze out his dollars, and the ship’s authorities would not admit +him except upon payment. + +This unwillingness to part with money is not only found amongst the +followers of Moses, but in those of Mahomet, and Christians too. When +we went to purchase in the bazaars, after offering money for change, +the honest fellows would frequently keep back several piastres, and +when urged to refund, would give most dismally: and begin doling out +penny by penny, and utter pathetic prayers to their customer not to +take any more. I bought five or six pounds’ worth of Broussa silks for +the womankind, in the bazaar at Constantinople, and the rich Armenian +who sold them begged for three-halfpence to pay his boat to Galata. +There is something naif and amusing in this exhibition of cheatery—this +simple cringing and wheedling, and passion for twopence-halfpenny. It +was pleasant to give a millionaire beggar an alms, and laugh in his +face and say, “There, Dives, there’s a penny for you: be happy, you +poor old swindling scoundrel, as far as a penny goes.” I used to watch +these Jews on shore, and making bargains with one another as soon as +they came on board; the battle between vendor and purchaser was an +agony—they shrieked, clasped hands, appealed to one another +passionately; their handsome noble faces assumed a look of woe— quite +an heroic eagerness and sadness about a farthing. + +Ambassadors from our Hebrews descended at Rhodes to buy provisions, and +it was curious to see their dealings: there was our venerable Rabbi, +who, robed in white and silver, and bending over his book at the +morning service, looked like a patriarch, and whom I saw chaffering +about a fowl with a brother Rhodian Israelite. How they fought over the +body of that lean animal! The street swarmed with Jews: goggling eyes +looked out from the old carved casements— hooked noses issued from the +low antique doors—Jew boys driving donkeys, Hebrew mothers nursing +children, dusky, tawdry, ragged young beauties and most venerable +grey-bearded fathers were all gathered round about the affair of the +hen! And at the same time that our Rabbi was arranging the price of it, +his children were instructed to procure bundles of green branches to +decorate the ship during their feast. Think of the centuries during +which these wonderful people have remained unchanged; and how, from the +days of Jacob downwards, they have believed and swindled! + +The Rhodian Jews, with their genius for filth, have made their quarter +of the noble desolate old town the most ruinous and wretched of all. +The escutcheons of the proud old knights are still carved over the +doors, whence issue these miserable greasy hucksters and pedlars. The +Turks respected these emblems of the brave enemies whom they had +overcome, and left them untouched. When the French seized Malta they +were by no means so delicate: they effaced armorial bearings with their +usual hot-headed eagerness; and a few years after they had torn down +the coats-of- arms of the gentry, the heroes of Malta and Egypt were +busy devising heraldry for themselves, and were wild to be barons and +counts of the Empire. + +The chivalrous relics at Rhodes are very superb. I know of no buildings +whose stately and picturesque aspect seems to correspond better with +one’s notions of their proud founders. The towers and gates are warlike +and strong, but beautiful and aristocratic: you see that they must have +been high-bred gentlemen who built them. The edifices appear in almost +as perfect a condition as when they were in the occupation of the noble +Knights of St. John; and they have this advantage over modern +fortifications, that they are a thousand times more picturesque. +Ancient war condescended to ornament itself, and built fine carved +castles and vaulted gates: whereas, to judge from Gibraltar and Malta, +nothing can be less romantic than the modern military architecture; +which sternly regards the fighting, without in the least heeding the +war-paint. Some of the huge artillery with which the place was defended +still lies in the bastions; and the touch-holes of the guns are +preserved by being covered with rusty old corselets, worn by defenders +of the fort three hundred years ago. The Turks, who battered down +chivalry, seem to be waiting their turn of destruction now. In walking +through Rhodes one is strangely affected by witnessing the signs of +this double decay. For instance, in the streets of the knights, you see +noble houses, surmounted by noble escutcheons of superb knights, who +lived there, and prayed, and quarrelled, and murdered the Turks; and +were the most gallant pirates of the inland seas; and made vows of +chastity, and robbed and ravished; and, professing humility, would +admit none but nobility into their order; and died recommending +themselves to sweet St. John, and calmly hoping for heaven in +consideration of all the heathen they had slain. When this superb +fraternity was obliged to yield to courage as great as theirs, faith as +sincere, and to robbers even more dexterous and audacious than the +noblest knight who ever sang a canticle to the Virgin, these halls were +filled by magnificent Pashas and Agas, who lived here in the intervals +of war, and having conquered its best champions, despised Christendom +and chivalry pretty much as an Englishman despises a Frenchman. Now the +famous house is let to a shabby merchant, who has his little beggarly +shop in the bazaar; to a small officer, who ekes out his wretched +pension by swindling, and who gets his pay in bad coin. Mahometanism +pays in pewter now, in place of silver and gold. The lords of the world +have run to seed. The powerless old sword frightens nobody now—the +steel is turned to pewter too, somehow, and will no longer shear a +Christian head off any shoulders. In the Crusades my wicked sympathies +have always been with the Turks. They seem to me the better Christians +of the two: more humane, less brutally presumptuous about their own +merits, and more generous in esteeming their neighbours. As far as I +can get at the authentic story, Saladin is a pearl of refinement +compared to the brutal beef-eating Richard—about whom Sir Walter Scott +has led all the world astray. + +When shall we have a real account of those times and heroes—no +good-humoured pageant, like those of the Scott romances—but a real +authentic story to instruct and frighten honest people of the present +day, and make them thankful that the grocer governs the world now in +place of the baron? Meanwhile a man of tender feelings may be pardoned +for twaddling a little over this sad spectacle of the decay of two of +the great institutions of the world. Knighthood is gone—amen; it +expired with dignity, its face to the foe: and old Mahometanism is +lingering about just ready to drop. But it is unseemly to see such a +Grand Potentate in such a state of decay: the son of Bajazet Ilderim +insolvent; the descendants of the Prophet bullied by Calmucs and +English and whipper-snapper Frenchmen; the Fountain of Magnificence +done up, and obliged to coin pewter! Think of the poor dear houris in +Paradise, how sad they must look as the arrivals of the Faithful become +less and less frequent every day. I can fancy the place beginning to +wear the fatal Vauxhall look of the Seraglio, and which has pursued me +ever since I saw it: the fountains of eternal wine are beginning to run +rather dry, and of a questionable liquor; the ready-roasted-meat trees +may cry, “Come eat me,” every now and then, in a faint voice, without +any gravy in it—but the Faithful begin to doubt about the quality of +the victuals. Of nights you may see the houris sitting sadly under +them, darning their faded muslins: Ali, Omar, and the Imaums are +reconciled and have gloomy consultations: and the Chief of the Faithful +himself, the awful camel-driver, the supernatural husband of Khadijah, +sits alone in a tumbledown kiosk, thinking moodily of the destiny that +is impending over him; and of the day when his gardens of bliss shall +be as vacant as the bankrupt Olympus. + +All the town of Rhodes has this appearance of decay and ruin, except a +few consuls’ houses planted on the sea-side, here and there, with +bright flags flaunting in the sun; fresh paint; English crockery; +shining mahogany, &c.,—so many emblems of the new prosperity of their +trade, while the old inhabitants were going to rack—the fine Church of +St. John, converted into a mosque, is a ruined church, with a ruined +mosque inside; the fortifications are mouldering away, as much as time +will let them. There was considerable bustle and stir about the little +port; but it was the bustle of people who looked for the most part to +be beggars; and I saw no shop in the bazaar that seemed to have the +value of a pedlar’s pack. + +I took, by way of guide, a young fellow from Berlin, a journeyman +shoemaker, who had just been making a tour in Syria, and who professed +to speak both Arabic and Turkish quite fluently—which I thought he +might have learned when he was a student at college, before he began +his profession of shoemaking; but I found he only knew about three +words of Turkish, which were produced on every occasion, as I walked +under his guidance through the desolate streets of the noble old town. +We went out upon the lines of fortification, through an ancient gate +and guard-house, where once a chapel probably stood, and of which the +roofs were richly carved and gilded. A ragged squad of Turkish soldiers +lolled about the gate now; a couple of boys on a donkey; a grinning +slave on a mule; a pair of women flapping along in yellow papooshes; a +basket-maker sitting under an antique carved portal, and chanting or +howling as he plaited his osiers: a peaceful well of water, at which +knights’ chargers had drunk, and at which the double-boyed donkey was +now refreshing himself—would have made a pretty picture for a +sentimental artist. As he sits, and endeavours to make a sketch of this +plaintive little comedy, a shabby dignitary of the island comes +clattering by on a thirty-shilling horse, and two or three of the +ragged soldiers leave their pipes to salute him as he passes under the +Gothic archway. + +The astonishing brightness and clearness of the sky under which the +island seemed to bask, struck me as surpassing anything I had seen- +-not even at Cadiz, or the Piraeus, had I seen sands so yellow, or +water so magnificently blue. The houses of the people along the shore +were but poor tenements, with humble courtyards and gardens; but every +fig-tree was gilded and bright, as if it were in an Hesperian orchard; +the palms, planted here and there, rose with a sort of halo of light +round about them; the creepers on the walls quite dazzled with the +brilliancy of their flowers and leaves; the people lay in the cool +shadows, happy and idle, with handsome solemn faces; nobody seemed to +be at work; they only talked a very little, as if idleness and silence +were a condition of the delightful shining atmosphere in which they +lived. + +We went down to an old mosque by the sea-shore, with a cluster of +ancient domes hard by it, blazing in the sunshine, and carved all over +with names of Allah, and titles of old pirates and generals who reposed +there. The guardian of the mosque sat in the garden- court, upon a high +wooden pulpit, lazily wagging his body to and fro, and singing the +praises of the Prophet gently through his nose, as the breeze stirred +through the trees overhead, and cast chequered and changing shadows +over the paved court, and the little fountains, and the nasal psalmist +on his perch. On one side was the mosque, into which you could see, +with its white walls and cool-matted floor, and quaint carved pulpit +and ornaments, and nobody at prayers. In the middle distance rose up +the noble towers and battlements of the knightly town, with the deep +sea-line behind them. + +It really seemed as if everybody was to have a sort of sober +cheerfulness, and must yield to indolence under this charming +atmosphere. I went into the courtyard by the sea-shore (where a few +lazy ships were lying, with no one on board), and found it was the +prison of the place. The door was as wide open as Westminster Hall. +Some prisoners, one or two soldiers and functionaries, and some +prisoners’ wives, were lolling under an arcade by a fountain; other +criminals were strolling about here and there, their chains clinking +quite cheerfully; and they and the guards and officials came up +chatting quite friendly together, and gazed languidly over the +portfolio, as I was endeavouring to get the likeness of one or two of +these comfortable malefactors. One old and wrinkled she- criminal, whom +I had selected on account of the peculiar hideousness of her +countenance, covered it up with a dirty cloth, at which there was a +general roar of laughter among this good- humoured auditory of +cut-throats, pickpockets, and policemen. The only symptom of a prison +about the place was a door, across which a couple of sentinels were +stretched, yawning; while within lay three freshly-caught +pirates—chained by the leg. They had committed some murders of a very +late date, and were awaiting sentence; but their wives were allowed to +communicate freely with them: and it seemed to me that if half-a-dozen +friends would set them flee, and they themselves had energy enough to +move, the sentinels would be a great deal too lazy to walk after them. + +The combined influence of Rhodes and Ramazan, I suppose, had taken +possession of my friend the Schustergesell from Berlin. As soon as he +received his fee, he cut me at once, and went and lay down by a +fountain near the port, and ate grapes out of a dirty pocket- +handkerchief. Other Christian idlers lay near him, dozing, or +sprawling, in the boats, or listlessly munching water-melons. Along the +coffee-houses of the quay sat hundreds more, with no better employment; +and the captain of the “Iberia” and his officers, and several of the +passengers in that famous steamship, were in this company, being idle +with all their might. Two or three adventurous young men went off to +see the valley where the dragon was killed; but others, more +susceptible of the real influence of the island, I am sure would not +have moved though we had been told that the Colossus himself was taking +a walk half a mile off. + + + + +CHAPTER IX +THE WHITE SQUALL + + +On deck, beneath the awning, I dozing lay and yawning; It was the grey +of dawning, Ere yet the sun arose; And above the funnel’s roaring, And +the fitful wind’s deploring, I heard the cabin snoring With universal +nose. I could hear the passengers snorting, I envied their disporting: +Vainly I was courting The pleasure of a doze. + +So I lay, and wondered why light Came not, and watched the twilight And +the glimmer of the skylight, That shot across the deck; And the +binnacle pale and steady, And the dull glimpse of the dead-eye, And the +sparks in fiery eddy, That whirled from the chimney neck: In our jovial +floating prison There was sleep from fore to mizen, And never a star +had risen The hazy sky to speck. + +Strange company we harboured; We’d a hundred Jews to larboard, +Unwashed, uncombed, uubarbered, Jews black, and brown, and grey; With +terror it would seize ye, And make your souls uneasy, To see those +Rabbis greasy, Who did nought but scratch and pray: Their dirty +children pucking, Their dirty saucepans cooking, Their dirty fingers +hooking Their swarming fleas away. + +To starboard Turks and Greeks were, Whiskered, and brown their cheeks +were, Enormous wide their breeks were, Their pipes did puff alway; Each +on his mat allotted, In silence smoked and squatted, Whilst round their +children trotted In pretty, pleasant play. He can’t but smile who +traces The smiles on those brown faces, And the pretty prattling graces +Of those small heathens gay. + +And so the hours kept tolling, And through the ocean rolling, Went the +brave “Iberia” bowling Before the break of day - When a SQUALL upon a +sudden Came o’er the waters scudding; And the clouds began to gather, +And the sea was lashed to lather, And the lowering thunder grumbled, +And the lightning jumped and tumbled, And the ship, and all the ocean, +Woke up in wild commotion. + +Then the wind set up a howling, And the poodle-dog a yowling, And the +cocks began a crowing, And the old cow raised a lowing, As she heard +the tempest blowing; And fowls and geese did cackle, And the cordage +and the tackle Began to shriek and crackle; And the spray dashed o’er +the funnels, And down the deck in runnels; And the rushing water soaks +all, From the seamen in the fo’ksal To the stokers, whose black faces +Peer out of their bed-places; And the captain he was bawling, And the +sailors pulling, hauling; And the quarter-deck tarpauling Was shivered +in the squalling; And the passengers awaken, Most pitifully shaken; And +the steward jumps up, and hastens For the necessary basins. + +Then the Greeks they groaned and quivered, And they knelt, and moaned, +and shivered, As the plunging waters met them, And splashed and overset +them; And they call in their emergence Upon countless saints and +virgins; And their marrowbones are bended, And they think the world is +ended. + +And the Turkish women for’ard Were frightened and behorror’d; And, +shrieking and bewildering, The mothers clutched their children; The men +sung, “Allah Illah! Mashallah Bismillah!” + +As the warring waters doused them, And splashed them and soused them; +And they called upon the Prophet, And thought but little of it. + +Then all the fleas in Jewry Jumped up and bit like fury; And the +progeny of Jacob Did on the main-deck wake up (I wot those greasy +Rabbins Would never pay for cabins); And each man moaned and jabbered +in His filthy Jewish gaberdine, In woe and lamentation, And howling +consternation. And the splashing water drenches Their dirty brats and +wenches; And they crawl from bales and benches, In a hundred thousand +stenches. + +This was the White Squall famous Which latterly o’ercame us, And which +all will well remember On the 28th September: When a Prussian Captain +of Lancers (Those tight-laced, whiskered prancers) Came on the deck +astonished, By that wild squall admonished, And wondering cried, +“Potztausend! Wie ist der Sturm jetzt brausend!” And looked at Captain +Lewis, Who calmly stood and blew his Cigar in all the bustle, And +scorned the tempest’s tussle. And oft we’ve thought thereafter How he +beat the storm to laughter; For well he knew his vessel With that vain +wind could wrestle; And when a wreck we thought her And doomed +ourselves to slaughter, How gaily he fought her, And through the hubbub +brought her, And, as the tempest caught her, Cried, “GEORGE! SOME +BRANDY-AND-WATER!” + +And when, its force expended, The harmless storm was ended, And, as the +sunrise splendid Came blushing o’er the sea; I thought, as day was +breaking, My little girls were waking, And smiling, and making A prayer +at home for me. + + + + +CHAPTER X +TELMESSUS—BEYROUT + + +There should have been a poet in our company to describe that charming +little bay of Glaucus, into which we entered on the 26th of September, +in the first steam-boat that ever disturbed its beautiful waters. You +can’t put down in prose that delicious episode of natural poetry; it +ought to be done in a symphony, full of sweet melodies and swelling +harmonies; or sung in a strain of clear crystal iambics, such as Milnes +knows how to write. A mere map, drawn in words, gives the mind no +notion of that exquisite nature. What do mountains become in type, or +rivers in Mr. Vizetelly’s best brevier? Here lies the sweet bay, +gleaming peaceful in the rosy sunshine: green islands dip here and +there in its waters: purple mountains swell circling round it; and +towards them, rising from the bay, stretches a rich green plain, +fruitful with herbs and various foliage, in the midst of which the +white houses twinkle. I can see a little minaret, and some spreading +palm-trees; but, beyond these, the description would answer as well for +Bantry Bay as for Makri. You could write so far, nay, much more +particularly and grandly, without seeing the place at all, and after +reading Beaufort’s “Caramania,” which gives you not the least notion of +it. + +Suppose the great Hydrographer of the Admiralty himself can’t describe +it, who surveyed the place; suppose Mr. Fellowes, who discovered it +afterwards—suppose, I say, Sir John Fellowes, Knt., can’t do it (and I +defy any man of imagination to got an impression of Telmessus from his +book)—can you, vain man, hope to try? The effect of the artist, as I +take it, ought to be, to produce upon his hearer’s mind, by his art, an +effect something similar to that produced on his own by the sight of +the natural object. Only music, or the best poetry, can do this. +Keats’s “Ode to the Grecian Urn” is the best description I know of that +sweet old silent ruin of Telmessus. After you have once seen it, the +remembrance remains with you, like a tune from Mozart, which he seems +to have caught out of heaven, and which rings sweet harmony in your +ears for ever after! It’s a benefit for all after life! You have but to +shut your eyes, and think, and recall it, and the delightful vision +comes smiling back, to your order!—the divine air—the delicious little +pageant, which nature set before you on this lucky day. + +Here is the entry made in the note-book on the eventful day:- “In the +morning steamed into the bay of Glaucus—landed at Makri— cheerful old +desolate village—theatre by the beautiful sea-shore— great fertility, +oleanders—a palm-tree in the midst of the village, spreading out like a +Sultan’s aigrette—sculptured caverns, or tombs, up the mountain—camels +over the bridge.” + +Perhaps it is best for a man of fancy to make his own landscape out of +these materials: to group the couched camels under the plane- trees; +the little crowd of wandering ragged heathens come down to the calm +water, to behold the nearing steamer; to fancy a mountain, in the sides +of which some scores of tombs are rudely carved; pillars and porticos, +and Doric entablatures. But it is of the little theatre that he must +make the most beautiful picture—a charming little place of festival, +lying out on the shore, and looking over the sweet bay and the swelling +purple islands. No theatre-goer ever looked out on a fairer scene. It +encourages poetry, idleness, delicious sensual reverie. O Jones! friend +of my heart! would you not like to be a white-robed Greek, lolling +languidly, on the cool benches here, and pouring compliments (in the +Ionic dialect) into the rosy ears of Neaera? Instead of Jones, your +name should be Ionides; instead of a silk hat, you should wear a +chaplet of roses in your hair: you would not listen to the choruses +they were singing on the stage, for the voice of the fair one would be +whispering a rendezvous for the mesonuktiais horais, and my Ionides +would have no ear for aught beside. Yonder, in the mountain, they would +carve a Doric cave temple, to receive your urn when all was done; and +you would be accompanied thither by a dirge of the surviving Ionidae. +The caves of the dead are empty now, however, and their place knows +them not any more among the festal haunts of the living. But, by way of +supplying the choric melodies sung here in old time, one of our +companions mounted on the scene and spouted, + +“My name is Norval.” + +On the same day we lay to for a while at another ruined theatre, that +of Antiphilos. The Oxford men, fresh with recollections of the +little-go, bounded away up the hill on which it lies to the ruin, +measured the steps of the theatre, and calculated the width of the +scene; while others, less active, watched them with telescopes from the +ship’s sides, as they plunged in and out of the stones and hollows. + +Two days after the scene was quite changed. We were out of sight of the +classical country, and lay in St. George’s Bay, behind a huge mountain, +upon which St. George fought the dragon, and rescued the lovely Lady +Sabra, the King of Babylon’s daughter. The Turkish fleet was lying +about us, commanded by that Halil Pasha whose two children the two last +Sultans murdered. The crimson flag, with the star and crescent, floated +at the stern of his ship. Our diplomatist put on his uniform and +cordons, and paid his Excellency a visit. He spoke in rapture, when he +returned, of the beauty and order of the ship, and the urbanity of the +infidel Admiral. He sent us bottles of ancient Cyprus wine to drink: +and the captain of Her Majesty’s ship “Trump,” alongside which we were +lying, confirmed that good opinion of the Capitan Pasha which the +reception of the above present led us to entertain, by relating many +instances of his friendliness and hospitalities. Captain G- said the +Turkish ships were as well manned, as well kept, and as well +manoeuvred, as any vessels in any service; and intimated a desire to +command a Turkish seventy-four, and a perfect willingness to fight her +against a French ship of the same size. But I heartily trust he will +neither embrace the Mahometan opinions, nor be called upon to engage +any seventy-four whatever. If he do, let us hope he will have his own +men to fight with. If the crew of the “Trump” were all like the crew of +the captain’s boat, they need fear no two hundred and fifty men out of +any country, with any Joinville at their head. We were carried on shore +by this boat. For two years, during which the “Trump” had been lying +off Beyrout, none of the men but these eight had ever set foot on +shore. Mustn’t it be a happy life? We were landed at the busy quay of +Beyrout, flanked by the castle that the fighting old commodore half +battered down. + +Along the Beyrout quays civilisation flourishes under the flags of the +consuls, which are streaming out over the yellow buildings in the clear +air. Hither she brings from England her produce of marine-stores and +woollens, her crockeries, her portable soups, and her bitter ale. +Hither she has brought politeness, and the last modes from Paris. They +were exhibited in the person of a pretty lady, superintending the great +French store, and who, seeing a stranger sketching on the quay, sent +forward a man with a chair to accommodate that artist, and greeted him +with a bow and a smile, such as only can be found in France. Then she +fell to talking with a young French officer with a beard, who was +greatly smitten with her. They were making love just as they do on the +Boulevard. An Arab porter left his bales, and the camel he was +unloading, to come and look at the sketch. Two stumpy flat-faced +Turkish soldiers, in red caps and white undresses, peered over the +paper. A noble little Lebanonian girl, with a deep yellow face, and +curly dun- coloured hair, and a blue tattooed chin, and for all +clothing a little ragged shift of blue cloth, stood by like a little +statue, holding her urn, and stared with wondering brown eyes. How +magnificently blue the water was!—how bright the flags and buildings as +they shone above it, and the lines of the rigging tossing in the bay! +The white crests of the blue waves jumped and sparkled like +quicksilver; the shadows were as broad and cool as the lights were +brilliant and rosy; the battered old towers of the commodore looked +quite cheerful in the delicious atmosphere; and the mountains beyond +were of an amethyst colour. The French officer and the lady went on +chattering quite happily about love, the last new bonnet, or the battle +of Isly, or the “Juif Errant.” How neatly her gown and sleeves fitted +her pretty little person! We had not seen a woman for a month, except +honest Mrs. Flanigan, the stewardess, and the ladies of our party, and +the tips of the noses of the Constantinople beauties as they passed by +leering from their yakmacs, waddling and plapping in their odious +yellow papooshes. + +And this day is to be marked with a second white stone, for having +given the lucky writer of the present, occasion to behold a second +beauty. This was a native Syrian damsel, who bore the sweet name of +Mariam. So it was she stood as two of us (I mention the number for fear +of scandal) took her picture. + +So it was that the good-natured black cook looked behind her young +mistress, with a benevolent grin, that only the admirable Leslie could +paint. + +Mariam was the sister of the young guide whom we hired to show us +through the town, and to let us be cheated in the purchase of gilt +scarfs and handkerchiefs, which strangers think proper to buy. And +before the following authentic drawing could be made, many were the +stratagems the wily artists were obliged to employ, to subdue the +shyness of the little Mariam. In the first place, she would stand +behind the door (from which in the darkness her beautiful black eyes +gleamed out like penny tapers); nor could the entreaties of her brother +and mamma bring her from that hiding-place. In order to conciliate the +latter, we began by making a picture of her too— that is, not of her, +who was an enormous old fat woman in yellow, quivering all over with +strings of pearls, and necklaces of sequins, and other ornaments, the +which descended from her neck, and down her ample stomacher: we did not +depict that big old woman, who would have been frightened at an +accurate representation of her own enormity; but an ideal being, all +grace and beauty, dressed in her costume, and still simpering before me +in my sketch- book like a lady in a book of fashions. + +This portrait was shown to the old woman, who handed it over to the +black cook, who, grinning, carried it to little Mariam—and the result +was, that the young creature stepped forward, and submitted; and has +come over to Europe as you see. {2} + +A very snug and happy family did this of Mariam’s appear to be. If you +could judge by all the laughter and giggling, by the splendour of the +women’s attire, by the neatness of the little house, prettily decorated +with arabesque paintings, neat mats, and gay carpets, they were a +family well to do in the Beyrout world, and lived with as much comfort +as any Europeans. They had one book; and, on the wall of the principal +apartment, a black picture of the Virgin, whose name is borne by pretty +Mariam. + +The camels and the soldiers, the bazaars and khans, the fountains and +awnings, which chequer, with such delightful variety of light and +shade, the alleys and markets of an Oriental town, are to be seen in +Beyrout in perfection; and an artist might here employ himself for +months with advantage and pleasure. A new costume was here added to the +motley and picturesque assembly of dresses. This was the dress of the +blue-veiled women from the Lebanon, stalking solemnly through the +markets, with huge horns, near a yard high, on their foreheads. For +thousands of years, since the time the Hebrew prophets wrote, these +horns have so been exalted in the Lebanon. + +At night Captain Lewis gave a splendid ball and supper to the “Trump.” +We had the “Trump’s” band to perform the music; and a grand sight it +was to see the captain himself enthusiastically leading on the drum. +Blue lights and rockets were burned from the yards of our ship; which +festive signals were answered presently from the “Trump,” and from +another English vessel in the harbour. + +They must have struck the Capitan Pasha with wonder, for he sent his +secretary on board of us to inquire what the fireworks meant. And the +worthy Turk had scarcely put his foot on the deck, when he found +himself seized round the waist by one of the “Trump’s” officers, and +whirling round the deck in a waltz, to his own amazement, and the huge +delight of the company. His face of wonder and gravity, as he went on +twirling, could not have been exceeded by that of a dancing dervish at +Scutari; and the manner in which he managed to enjamber the waltz +excited universal applause. + +I forgot whether he accommodated himself to European ways so much +further as to drink champagne at supper-time; to say that he did would +be telling tales out of school, and might interfere with the future +advancement of that jolly dancing Turk. + +We made acquaintance with another of the Sultan’s subjects, who, I +fear, will have occasion to doubt of the honour of the English nation, +after the foul treachery with which he was treated. + +Among the occupiers of the little bazaar matchboxes, vendors of +embroidered handkerchiefs and other articles of showy Eastern +haberdashery, was a good-looking neat young fellow, who spoke English +very fluently, and was particularly attentive to all the passengers on +board our ship. This gentleman was not only a pocket-handkerchief +merchant in the bazaar, but earned a further livelihood by letting out +mules and donkeys; and he kept a small lodging-house, or inn, for +travellers, as we were informed. + +No wonder he spoke good English, and was exceedingly polite and +well-bred; for the worthy man had passed some time in England, and in +the best society too. That humble haberdasher at Beyrout had been a +lion here, at the very best houses of the great people, and had +actually made his appearance at Windsor, where he was received as a +Syrian Prince, and treated with great hospitality by Royalty itself. + +I don’t know what waggish propensity moved one of the officers of the +“Trump” to say that there was an equerry of His Royal Highness the +Prince on board, and to point me out as the dignified personage in +question. So the Syrian Prince was introduced to the Royal equerry, and +a great many compliments passed between us. I even had the audacity to +state that on my very last interview with my Royal master, His Royal +Highness had said, “Colonel Titmarsh, when you go to Beyrout, you will +make special inquiries regarding my interesting friend Cogia Hassan.” + +Poor Cogia Hassan (I forget whether that was his name, but it is as +good as another) was overpowered with this Royal message; and we had an +intimate conversation together, at which the waggish officer of the +“Trump” assisted with the greatest glee. + +But see the consequences of deceit! The next day, as we were getting +under way, who should come on board but my friend the Syrian Prince, +most eager for a last interview with the Windsor equerry; and he begged +me to carry his protestations of unalterable fidelity to the gracious +consort of Her Majesty. Nor was this all. Cogia Hassan actually +produced a great box of sweetmeats, of which he begged my Excellency to +accept, and a little figure of a doll dressed in the costume of +Lebanon. Then the punishment of imposture began to be felt severely by +me. How to accept the poor devil’s sweetmeats? How to refuse them? And +as we know that one fib leads to another, so I was obliged to support +the first falsehood by another; and putting on a dignified air—“Cogia +Hassan,” says I, “I am surprised you don’t know the habits of the +British Court better, and are not aware that our gracious master +solemnly forbids his servants to accept any sort of backsheesh upon our +travels.” + +So Prince Cogia Hassan went over the side with his chest of sweetmeats, +but insisted on leaving the doll, which may be worth +twopence-halfpenny; of which, and of the costume of the women of +Lebanon, the following is an accurate likeness:- + + + + +CHAPTER XI +A DAY AND NIGHT IN SYRIA + + +When, after being for five whole weeks at sea, with a general belief +that at the end of a few days the marine malady leaves you for good, +you find that a brisk wind and a heavy rolling swell create exactly the +same inward effects which they occasioned at the very commencement of +the voyage—you begin to fancy that you are unfairly dealt with: and I, +for my part, had thought of complaining to the Company of this +atrocious violation of the rules of their prospectus; but we were +perpetually coming to anchor in various ports, at which intervals of +peace and good-humour were restored to us. + +On the 3rd of October our cable rushed with a huge rattle into the blue +sea before Jaffa, at a distance of considerably more than a mile off +the town, which lay before us very clear, with the flags of the consuls +flaring in the bright sky and making a cheerful and hospitable show. +The houses a great heap of sun-baked stones, surmounted here and there +by minarets and countless little whitewashed domes; a few date-trees +spread out their fan-like heads over these dull-looking buildings; long +sands stretched away on either side, with low purple hills behind them; +we could see specks of camels crawling over these yellow plains; and +those persons who were about to land had the leisure to behold the +sea-spray flashing over the sands, and over a heap of black rocks which +lie before the entry to the town. The swell is very great, the passage +between the rocks narrow, and the danger sometimes considerable. So the +guide began to entertain the ladies and other passengers in the huge +country boat which brought us from the steamer with an agreeable story +of a lieutenant and eight seamen of one of Her Majesty’s ships, who +were upset, dashed to pieces, and drowned upon these rocks, through +which two men and two boys, with a very moderate portion of clothing, +each standing and pulling half an oar—there were but two oars between +them, and another by way of rudder—were endeavouring to guide us. + +When the danger of the rocks and surf was passed, came another danger +of the hideous brutes in brown skins and the briefest shirts, who came +towards the boat, straddling through the water with outstretched arms, +grinning and yelling their Arab invitations to mount their shoulders. I +think these fellows frightened the ladies still more than the rocks and +the surf; but the poor creatures were obliged to submit; and, +trembling, were accommodated somehow upon the mahogany backs of these +ruffians, carried through the shallows, and flung up to a ledge before +the city gate, where crowds more of dark people were swarming, howling +after their fashion. The gentlemen, meanwhile, were having arguments +about the eternal backsheesh with the roaring Arab boatmen; and I +recall with wonder and delight especially, the curses and screams of +one small and extremely loud-lunged fellow, who expressed discontent at +receiving a five, instead of a six-piastre piece. But how is one to +know, without possessing the language? Both coins are made of a greasy +pewtery sort of tin; and I thought the biggest was the most valuable: +but the fellow showed a sense of their value, and a disposition +seemingly to cut any man’s throat who did not understand it. Men’s +throats have been cut for a less difference before now. + +Being cast upon the ledge, the first care of our gallantry was to look +after the ladies, who were scared and astonished by the naked savage +brutes, who were shouldering the poor things to and fro; and bearing +them through these and a dark archway, we came into a street crammed +with donkeys and their packs and drivers, and towering camels with +leering eyes looking into the second-floor rooms, and huge splay feet, +through which mesdames et mesdemoiselles were to be conducted. We made +a rush at the first open door, and passed comfortably under the heels +of some horses gathered under the arched court, and up a stone +staircase, which turned out to be that of the Russian consul’s house. +His people welcomed us most cordially to his abode, and the ladies and +the luggage (objects of our solicitude) were led up many stairs and +across several terraces to a most comfortable little room, under a dome +of its own, where the representative of Russia sat. Women with brown +faces and draggle-tailed coats and turbans, and wondering eyes, and no +stays, and blue beads and gold coins hanging round their necks, came to +gaze, as they passed, upon the fair neat Englishwomen. Blowsy black +cooks puffing over fires and the strangest pots and pans on the +terraces, children paddling about in long striped robes, interrupted +their sports or labours to come and stare; and the consul, in his cool +domed chamber, with a lattice overlooking the sea, with clean mats, and +pictures of the Emperor, the Virgin, and St. George, received the +strangers with smiling courtesies, regaling the ladies with +pomegranates and sugar, the gentlemen with pipes of tobacco, whereof +the fragrant tubes were three yards long. + +The Russian amenities concluded, we left the ladies still under the +comfortable cool dome of the Russian consulate, and went to see our own +representative. The streets of the little town are neither agreeable to +horse nor foot travellers. Many of the streets are mere flights of +rough steps, leading abruptly into private houses: you pass under +archways and passages numberless; a steep dirty labyrinth of +stone-vaulted stables and sheds occupies the ground- floor of the +habitations; and you pass from flat to flat of the terraces; at various +irregular corners of which, little chambers, with little private domes, +are erected, and the people live seemingly as much upon the terrace as +in the room. + +We found the English consul in a queer little arched chamber, with a +strange old picture of the King’s arms to decorate one side of it: and +here the consul, a demure old man, dressed in red flowing robes, with a +feeble janissary bearing a shabby tin-mounted staff, or mace, to denote +his office, received such of our nation as came to him for hospitality. +He distributed pipes and coffee to all and every one; he made us a +present of his house and all his beds for the night, and went himself +to lie quietly on the terrace; and for all this hospitality he declined +to receive any reward from us, and said he was but doing his duty in +taking us in. This worthy man, I thought, must doubtless be very well +paid by our Government for making such sacrifices; but it appears that +he does not get one single farthing, and that the greater number of our +Levant consuls are paid at a similar rate of easy remuneration. If we +have bad consular agents, have we a right to complain? If the worthy +gentlemen cheat occasionally, can we reasonably be angry? But in +travelling through these countries, English people, who don’t take into +consideration the miserable poverty and scanty resources of their +country, and are apt to brag and be proud of it, have their vanity hurt +by seeing the representatives of every nation but their own well and +decently maintained, and feel ashamed at sitting down under the shabby +protection of our mean consular flag. + +The active young men of our party had been on shore long before us, and +seized upon all the available horses in the town; but we relied upon a +letter from Halil Pasha, enjoining all governors and pashas to help us +in all ways: and hearing we were the bearers of this document, the cadi +and vice-governor of Jaffa came to wait upon the head of our party; +declared that it was his delight and honour to set eyes upon us; that +he would do everything in the world to serve us; that there were no +horses, unluckily, but he would send and get some in three hours; and +so left us with a world of grinning bows and many choice compliments +from one side to the other, which came to each filtered through an +obsequious interpreter. But hours passed, and the clatter of horses’ +hoofs was not heard. We had our dinner of eggs and flaps of bread, and +the sunset gun fired: we had our pipes and coffee again, and the night +fell. Is this man throwing dirt upon us? we began to think. Is he +laughing at our beards, and are our mothers’ graves ill-treated by this +smiling swindling cadi? We determined to go and seek in his own den +this shuffling dispenser of infidel justice. This time we would be no +more bamboozled by compliments; but we would use the language of stern +expostulation, and, being roused, would let the rascal hear the roar of +the indignant British lion; so we rose up in our wrath. The poor consul +got a lamp for us with a bit of wax-candle, such as I wonder his means +could afford; the shabby janissary marched ahead with his tin mace; the +two laquais-de-place, that two of our company had hired, stepped +forward, each with an old sabre, and we went clattering and stumbling +down the streets of the town, in order to seize upon this cadi in his +own divan. I was glad, for my part (though outwardly majestic and +indignant in demeanour), that the horses had not come, and that we had +a chance of seeing this little queer glimpse of Oriental life, which +the magistrate’s faithlessness procured for us. + +As piety forbids the Turks to eat during the weary daylight hours of +the Ramazan, they spend their time profitably in sleeping until the +welcome sunset, when the town wakens: all the lanterns are lighted up; +all the pipes begin to puff, and the narghiles to bubble; all the +sour-milk-and-sherbet-men begin to yell out the excellence of their +wares; all the frying-pans in the little dirty cookshops begin to friz, +and the pots to send forth a steam: and through this dingy, ragged, +bustling, beggarly, cheerful scene, we began now to march towards the +Bow Street of Jaffa. We bustled through a crowded narrow archway which +led to the cadi’s police- office, entered the little room, atrociously +perfumed with musk, and passing by the rail-board, where the common +sort stood, mounted the stage upon which his worship and friends sat, +and squatted down on the divans in stern and silent dignity. His honour +ordered us coffee, his countenance evidently showing considerable +alarm. A black slave, whose duty seemed to be to prepare this beverage +in a side-room with a furnace, prepared for each of us about a +teaspoonful of the liquor: his worship’s clerk, I presume, a tall Turk +of a noble aspect, presented it to us; and having lapped up the little +modicum of drink, the British lion began to speak. + +All the other travellers (said the lion with perfect reason) have good +horses and are gone; the Russians have got horses, the Spaniards have +horses, the English have horses, but we, we vizirs in our country, +coming with letters of Halil Pasha, are laughed at, spit upon! Are +Halil Pasha’s letters dirt, that you attend to them in this way? Are +British lions dogs that you treat them so?—and so on. This speech with +many variations was made on our side for a quarter of an hour; and we +finally swore that unless the horses were forthcoming we would write to +Halil Pasha the next morning, and to His Excellency the English +Minister at the Sublime Porte. Then you should have heard the chorus of +Turks in reply: a dozen voices rose up from the divan, shouting, +screaming, ejaculating, expectorating (the Arabic spoken language seems +to require a great employment of the two latter oratorical methods), +and uttering what the meek interpreter did not translate to us, but +what I dare say were by no means complimentary phrases towards us and +our nation. Finally, the palaver concluded by the cadi declaring that +by the will of Heaven horses should be forthcoming at three o’clock in +the morning; and that if not, why, then, we might write to Halil Pasha. + +This posed us, and we rose up and haughtily took leave. I should like +to know that fellow’s real opinion of us lions very much: and +especially to have had the translation of the speeches of a huge- +breeched turbaned roaring infidel, who looked and spoke as if he would +have liked to fling us all into the sea, which was hoarsely murmuring +under our windows an accompaniment to the concert within. + +We then marched through the bazaars, that were lofty and grim, and +pretty full of people. In a desolate broken building, some hundreds of +children were playing and singing; in many corners sat parties over +their water-pipes, one of whom every now and then would begin twanging +out a most queer chant; others there were playing at casino—a crowd +squatted around the squalling gamblers, and talking and looking on with +eager interest. In one place of the bazaar we found a hundred people at +least listening to a story- teller who delivered his tale with +excellent action, voice, and volubility: in another they were playing a +sort of thimble-rig with coffee-cups, all intent upon the game, and the +player himself very wild lest one of our party, who had discovered +where the pea lay, should tell the company. The devotion and energy +with which all these pastimes were pursued, struck me as much as +anything. These people have been playing thimble-rig and casino; that +story- teller has been shouting his tale of Antar for forty years; and +they are just as happy with this amusement now as when first they tried +it. Is there no ennui in the Eastern countries, and are blue-devils not +allowed to go abroad there? + +From the bazaars we went to see the house of Mustapha, said to be the +best house and the greatest man of Jaffa. But the great man had +absconded suddenly, and had fled into Egypt. The Sultan had made a +demand upon him for sixteen thousand purses, 80,000l.— Mustapha +retired—the Sultan pounced down upon his house, and his goods, his +horses and his mules. His harem was desolate. Mr. Milnes could have +written six affecting poems, had he been with us, on the dark +loneliness of that violated sanctuary. We passed from hall to hall, +terrace to terrace—a few fellows were slumbering on the naked floors, +and scarce turned as we went by them. We entered Mustapha’s particular +divan—there was the raised floor, but no bearded friends squatting away +the night of Ramazan; there was the little coffee furnace, but where +was the slave and the coffee and the glowing embers of the pipes? +Mustapha’s favourite passages from the Koran were still painted up on +the walls, but nobody was the wiser for them. We walked over a sleeping +negro, and opened the windows which looked into his gardens. The horses +and donkeys, the camels and mules were picketed there below, but where +is the said Mustapha? From the frying-pan of the Porte, has he not +fallen into the fire of Mehemet Ali? And which is best, to broil or to +fry? If it be but to read the “Arabian Nights” again on getting home, +it is good to have made this little voyage and seen these strange +places and faces. + +Then we went out through the arched lowering gateway of the town into +the plain beyond, and that was another famous and brilliant scene of +the “Arabian Nights.” The heaven shone with a marvellous brilliancy—the +plain disappeared far in the haze—the towers and battlements of the +town rose black against the sky—old outlandish trees rose up here and +there—clumps of camels were couched in the rare herbage—dogs were +baying about—groups of men lay sleeping under their haicks round +about—round about the tall gates many lights were twinkling—and they +brought us water-pipes and sherbet- -and we wondered to think that +London was only three weeks off. + +Then came the night at the consul’s. The poor demure old gentleman +brought out his mattresses; and the ladies sleeping round on the +divans, we lay down quite happy; and I for my part intended to make as +delightful dreams as Alnaschar; but—lo, the delicate mosquito sounded +his horn: the active flea jumped up, and came to feast on Christian +flesh (the Eastern flea bites more bitterly than the most savage bug in +Christendom), and the bug—oh, the accursed! Why was he made? What duty +has that infamous ruffian to perform in the world, save to make people +wretched? Only Bulwer in his most pathetic style could describe the +miseries of that night—the moaning, the groaning, the cursing, the +tumbling, the blistering, the infamous despair and degradation! I heard +all the cocks in Jaffa crow; the children crying, and the mothers +hushing them; the donkeys braying fitfully in the moonlight; at last I +heard the clatter of hoofs below, and the hailing of men. It was three +o’clock, the horses were actually come; nay, there were camels +likewise; asses and mules, pack-saddles and drivers, all bustling +together under the moonlight in the cheerful street—and the first night +in Syria was over. + + + + +CHAPTER XII +FROM JAFFA TO JERUSALEM + + +It took an hour or more to get our little caravan into marching order, +to accommodate all the packs to the horses, the horses to the riders; +to see the ladies comfortably placed in their litter, with a sleek and +large black mule fore and aft, a groom to each mule, and a tall and +exceedingly good-natured and mahogany-coloured infidel to walk by the +side of the carriage, to balance it as it swayed to and fro, and to +offer his back as a step to the inmates whenever they were minded to +ascend or alight. These three fellows, fasting through the Ramazan, and +over as rough a road, for the greater part, as ever shook mortal bones, +performed their fourteen hours’ walk of near forty miles with the most +admirable courage, alacrity, and good-humour. They once or twice drank +water on the march, and so far infringed the rule; but they refused all +bread or edible refreshment offered to them, and tugged on with an +energy that the best camel, and I am sure the best Christian, might +envy. What a lesson of good-humoured endurance it was to certain Pall +Mall Sardanapaluses, who grumble if club sofa cushions are not soft +enough! + +If I could write sonnets at leisure, I would like to chronicle in +fourteen lines my sensations on finding myself on a high Turkish +saddle, with a pair of fire-shovel stirrups and worsted reins, red +padded saddle-cloth, and innumerable tags, fringes, glass-beads, ends +of rope, to decorate the harness of the horse, the gallant steed on +which I was about to gallop into Syrian life. What a figure we cut in +the moonlight, and how they would have stared in the Strand! Ay, or in +Leicestershire, where I warrant such a horse and rider are not often +visible! The shovel stirrups are deucedly short; the clumsy leathers +cut the shins of some equestrians abominably; you sit over your horse +as it were on a tower, from which the descent would be very easy, but +for the big peak of the saddle. A good way for the inexperienced is to +put a stick or umbrella across the saddle peak again, so that it is +next to impossible to go over your horse’s neck. I found this a vast +comfort in going down the hills, and recommend it conscientiously to +other dear simple brethren of the city. + +Peaceful men, we did not ornament our girdles with pistols, yataghans, +&c., such as some pilgrims appeared to bristle all over with; and as a +lesson to such rash people, a story may be told which was narrated to +us at Jerusalem, and carries a wholesome moral. The Honourable Hoggin +Armer, who was lately travelling in the East, wore about his stomach +two brace of pistols, of such exquisite finish and make, that a Sheikh, +in the Jericho country, robbed him merely for the sake of the pistols. +I don’t know whether he has told the story to his friends at home. + +Another story about Sheikhs may here be told a propos. That celebrated +Irish Peer, Lord Oldgent (who was distinguished in the Buckinghamshire +Dragoons), having paid a sort of black mail to the Sheikh of Jericho +country, was suddenly set upon by another Sheikh, who claimed to be the +real Jerichonian governor; and these twins quarrelled over the body of +Lord Oldgent, as the widows for the innocent baby before Solomon. There +was enough for both—but these digressions are interminable. + +The party got under way at near four o’clock: the ladies in the litter, +the French femme-de-chambre manfully caracoling on a grey horse; the +cavaliers, like your humble servant, on their high saddles; the +domestics, flunkeys, guides, and grooms, on all sorts of animals,—some +fourteen in all. Add to these, two most grave and stately Arabs in +white beards, white turbans, white haicks and raiments; sabres curling +round their military thighs, and immense long guns at their backs. More +venerable warriors I never saw; they went by the side of the litter +soberly prancing. When we emerged from the steep clattering streets of +the city into the grey plains, lighted by the moon and starlight, these +militaries rode onward, leading the way through the huge avenues of +strange diabolical-looking prickly pears (plants that look as if they +had grown in Tartarus), by which the first mile or two of route from +the city is bounded; and as the dawn arose before us, exhibiting first +a streak of grey, then of green, then of red in the sky, it was fine to +see these martial figures defined against the rising light. The sight +of that little cavalcade, and of the nature around it, will always +remain with me, I think, as one of the freshest and most delightful +sensations I have enjoyed since the day I first saw Calais pier. It was +full day when they gave their horses a drink at a large pretty Oriental +fountain, and then presently we entered the open plain—the famous plain +of Sharon—so fruitful in roses once, now hardly cultivated, but always +beautiful and noble. + +Here presently, in the distance, we saw another cavalcade pricking over +the plain. Our two white warriors spread to the right and left, and +galloped to reconnoitre. We, too, put our steeds to the canter, and +handling our umbrellas as Richard did his lance against Saladin, went +undaunted to challenge this caravan. The fact is, we could distinguish +that it was formed of the party of our pious friends the Poles, and we +hailed them with cheerful shouting, and presently the two caravans +joined company, and scoured the plain at the rate of near four miles +per hour. The horse-master, a courier of this company, rode three miles +for our one. He was a broken- nosed Arab, with pistols, a sabre, a +fusee, a yellow Damascus cloth flapping over his head, and his nose +ornamented with diachylon. He rode a hog-necked grey Arab, bristling +over with harness, and jumped, and whirled, and reared, and halted, to +the admiration of all. + +Scarce had the diachylonian Arab finished his evolutions, when lo! yet +another cloud of dust was seen, and another party of armed and +glittering horsemen appeared. They, too, were led by an Arab, who was +followed by two janissaries, with silver maces shining in the sun. +’Twas the party of the new American Consul-General of Syria and +Jerusalem, hastening to that city, with the inferior consuls of Ramleh +and Jaffa to escort him. He expects to see the Millennium in three +years, and has accepted the office of consul at Jerusalem, so as to be +on the spot in readiness. + +When the diachylon Arab saw the American Arab, he straightway galloped +his steed towards him, took his pipe, which he delivered at his +adversary in guise of a jereed, and galloped round and round, and in +and out, and there and back again, as in a play of war. The American +replied in a similar playful ferocity—the two warriors made a little +tournament for us there on the plains before Jaffa, in the which +diachylon, being a little worsted, challenged his adversary to a race, +and fled away on his grey, the American following on his bay. Here poor +sticking-plaster was again worsted, the Yankee contemptuously riding +round him, and then declining further exercise. + +What more could mortal man want? A troop of knights and paladins could +have done no more. In no page of Walter Scott have I read a scene more +fair and sparkling. The sober warriors of our escort did not join in +the gambols of the young men. There they rode soberly, in their white +turbans, by their ladies’ litter, their long guns rising up behind +them. + +There was no lack of company along the road: donkeys numberless, camels +by twos and threes; now a mule-driver, trudging along the road, +chanting a most queer melody; now a lady, in white veil, black mask, +and yellow papooshes, bestriding her ass, and followed by her +husband,—met us on the way; and most people gave a salutation. +Presently we saw Ramleh, in a smoking mist, on the plain before us, +flanked to the right by a tall lonely tower, that might have held the +bells of some moutier of Caen or Evreux. As we entered, about three +hours and a half after starting, among the white domes and stone houses +of the little town, we passed the place of tombs. Two women were +sitting on one of them,—the one bending her head towards the stone, and +rocking to and fro, and moaning out a very sweet pitiful lamentation. +The American consul invited us to breakfast at the house of his +subaltern, the hospitable one-eyed Armenian, who represents the United +States at Jaffa. The stars and stripes were flaunting over his +terraces, to which we ascended, leaving our horses to the care of a +multitude of roaring ragged Arabs beneath, who took charge of and fed +the animals, though I can’t say in the least why; but, in the same way +as getting off my horse on entering Jerusalem, I gave the rein into the +hand of the first person near me, and have never heard of the worthy +brute since. At the American consul’s we were served first with rice +soup in pishpash, flavoured with cinnamon and spice; then with boiled +mutton, then with stewed ditto and tomatoes; then with fowls swimming +in grease; then with brown ragouts belaboured with onions; then with a +smoking pilaff of rice: several of which dishes I can pronounce to be +of excellent material and flavour. When the gentry had concluded this +repast, it was handed to a side table, where the commonalty speedily +discussed it. We left them licking their fingers as we hastened away +upon the second part of the ride. + +And as we quitted Ramleh, the scenery lost that sweet and peaceful look +which characterises the pretty plain we had traversed; and the sun, +too, rising in the heaven, dissipated all those fresh beautiful tints +in which God’s world is clothed of early morning, and which city people +have so seldom the chance of beholding. The plain over which we rode +looked yellow and gloomy; the cultivation little or none; the land +across the roadside fringed, for the most part, with straggling +wild-carrot plants; a patch of green only here and there. We passed +several herds of lean, small, well- conditioned cattle: many flocks of +black goats, tended now and then by a ragged negro shepherd, his long +gun slung over his back, his hand over his eyes to shade them as he +stared at our little cavalcade. Most of the half-naked countryfolks we +met had this dismal appendage to Eastern rustic life; and the weapon +could hardly be one of mere defence, for, beyond the faded skull-cap, +or tattered coat of blue or dirty white, the brawny, brown-chested, +solemn-looking fellows had nothing seemingly to guard. As before, there +was no lack of travellers on the road: more donkeys trotted by, looking +sleek and strong; camels singly and by pairs, laden with a little +humble ragged merchandise, on their way between the two towns. About +noon we halted eagerly at a short distance from an Arab village and +well, where all were glad of a drink of fresh water. A village of +beavers, or a colony of ants, make habitations not unlike these dismal +huts piled together on the plain here. There were no single huts along +the whole line of road; poor and wretched as they are, the Fellahs +huddle all together for protection from the other thieves their +neighbours. The government (which we restored to them) has no power to +protect them, and is only strong enough to rob them. The women, with +their long blue gowns and ragged veils, came to and fro with pitchers +on their heads. Rebecca had such an one when she brought drink to the +lieutenant of Abraham. The boys came staring round, bawling after us +with their fathers for the inevitable backsheesh. The village dogs +barked round the flocks, as they were driven to water or pasture. + +We saw a gloomy, not very lofty-looking ridge of hills in front of us; +the highest of which the guide pointing out to us, told us that from it +we should see Jerusalem. It looked very near, and we all set up a trot +of enthusiasm to get into this hill country. + +But that burst of enthusiasm (it may have carried us nearly a quarter +of a mile in three minutes) was soon destined to be checked by the +disagreeable nature of the country we had to traverse. Before we got to +the real mountain district, we were in a manner prepared for it, by the +mounting and descent of several lonely outlying hills, up and down +which our rough stony track wound. Then we entered the hill district, +and our path lay through the clattering bed of an ancient stream, whose +brawling waters have rolled away into the past, along with the fierce +and turbulent race who once inhabited these savage hills. There may +have been cultivation here two thousand years ago. The mountains, or +huge stony mounds environing this rough path, have level ridges all the +way up to their summits; on these parallel ledges there is still some +verdure and soil: when water flowed here, and the country was thronged +with that extraordinary population, which, according to the Sacred +Histories, was crowded into the region, these mountain steps may have +been gardens and vineyards, such as we see now thriving along the hills +of the Rhine. Now the district is quite deserted, and you ride among +what seem to be so many petrified waterfalls. We saw no animals moving +among the stony brakes; scarcely even a dozen little birds in the whole +course of the ride. The sparrows are all at Jerusalem, among the +housetops, where their ceaseless chirping and twittering forms the most +cheerful sound of the place. + +The company of Poles, the company of Oxford men, and the little +American army, travelled too quick for our caravan, which was made to +follow the slow progress of the ladies’ litter, and we had to make the +journey through the mountains in a very small number. Not one of our +party had a single weapon more dreadful than an umbrella: and a couple +of Arabs, wickedly inclined, might have brought us all to the halt, and +rifled every carpet-bag and pocket belonging to us. Nor can I say that +we journeyed without certain qualms of fear. When swarthy fellows, with +girdles full of pistols and yataghans, passed us without unslinging +their long guns—when scowling camel-riders, with awful long bending +lances, decorated with tufts of rags, or savage plumes of scarlet +feathers, went by without molestation—I think we were rather glad that +they did not stop and parley: for, after all, a British lion with an +umbrella is no match for an Arab with his infernal long gun. What, too, +would have become of our women? So we tried to think that it was +entirely out of anxiety for them that we were inclined to push on. + +There is a shady resting-place and village in the midst of the mountain +district where the travellers are accustomed to halt for an hour’s +repose and refreshment; and the other caravans were just quitting this +spot, having enjoyed its cool shades and waters, when we came up. +Should we stop? Regard for the ladies (of course no other earthly +consideration) made us say, “No!” What admirable self-denial and +chivalrous devotion! So our poor devils of mules and horses got no rest +and no water, our panting litter-men no breathing time, and we +staggered desperately after the procession ahead of us. It wound up the +mountain in front of us: the Poles with their guns and attendants, the +American with his janissaries; fifty or sixty all riding slowly like +the procession in “Bluebeard.” + +But alas, they headed us very soon; when we got up the weary hill they +were all out of sight. Perhaps thoughts of Fleet Street did cross the +minds of some of us then, and a vague desire to see a few policemen. +The district now seemed peopled, and with an ugly race. Savage +personages peered at us out of huts, and grim holes in the rocks. The +mules began to loiter most abominably—water the muleteers must +have—and, behold, we came to a pleasant-looking village of trees +standing on a hill; children were shaking figs from the trees—women +were going about—before us was the mosque of a holy man—the village, +looking like a collection of little forts, rose up on the hill to our +right, with a long view of the fields and gardens stretching from it, +and camels arriving with their burdens. Here we must stop; Paolo, the +chief servant, knew the Sheikh of the village—he very good man—give him +water and supper- -water very good here—in fact we began to think of +the propriety of halting here for the night, and making our entry into +Jerusalem on the next day. + +A man on a handsome horse dressed in red came prancing up to us, +looking hard at the ladies in the litter, and passed away. Then two +others sauntered up, one handsome, and dressed in red too, and he +stared into the litter without ceremony, began to play with a little +dog that lay there, asked if we were Inglees, and was answered by me in +the affirmative. Paolo had brought the water, the most delicious +draught in the world. The gentlefolks had had some, the poor muleteers +were longing for it. The French maid, the courageous Victoire (never +since the days of Joan of Arc has there surely been a more gallant and +virtuous female of France) refused the drink; when suddenly a servant +of the party scampers up to his master and says: “Abou Gosh says the +ladies must get out and show themselves to the women of the village!” + +It was Abou Gosh himself, the redoubted robber Sheikh about whom we had +been laughing and crying “Wolf!” all day. Never was seen such a skurry! +“March!” was the instant order given. When Victoire heard who it was +and the message, you should have seen how she changed countenance; +trembling for her virtue in the ferocious clutches of a Gosh. “Un verre +d’eau pour l’amour de Dieu!” gasped she, and was ready to faint on her +saddle. “Ne buvez plus, Victoire!” screamed a little fellow of our +party. “Push on, push on!” cried one and all. “What’s the matter?” +exclaimed the ladies in the litter, as they saw themselves suddenly +jogging on again. But we took care not to tell them what had been the +designs of the redoubtable Abou Gosh. Away then we went—Victoire was +saved—and her mistresses rescued from dangers they knew not of, until +they were a long way out of the village. + +Did he intend insult or good will? Did Victoire escape the odious +chance of becoming Madame Abou Gosh? Or did the mountain chief simply +propose to be hospitable after his fashion? I think the latter was his +desire; if the former had been his wish, a half- dozen of his long guns +could have been up with us in a minute, and had all our party at their +mercy. But now, for the sake of the mere excitement, the incident was, +I am sorry to say, rather a pleasant one than otherwise: especially for +a traveller who is in the happy condition of being able to sing before +robbers, as is the case with the writer of the present. + +A little way out of the land of Goshen we came upon a long stretch of +gardens and vineyards, slanting towards the setting sun, which +illuminated numberless golden clusters of the most delicious grapes, of +which we stopped and partook. Such grapes were never before tasted; +water so fresh as that which a countryman fetched for us from a well +never sluiced parched throats before. It was the ride, the sun, and +above all Abou Gosh, who made that refreshment so sweet, and hereby I +offer him my best thanks. Presently, in the midst of a most diabolical +ravine, down which our horses went sliding, we heard the evening gun: +it was fired from Jerusalem. The twilight is brief in this country, and +in a few minutes the landscape was grey round about us, and the sky +lighted up by a hundred thousand stars, which made the night beautiful. + +Under this superb canopy we rode for a couple of hours to our journey’s +end. The mountains round about us dark, lonely, and sad; the landscape +as we saw it at night (it is not more cheerful in the daytime), the +most solemn and forlorn I have ever seen. The feelings of almost terror +with which, riding through the night, we approached this awful place, +the centre of the world’s past and future history, have no need to be +noted down here. The recollection of those sensations must remain with +a man as long as his memory lasts; and he should think of them as +often, perhaps, as he should talk of them little. + + + + +CHAPTER XIII +JERUSALEM + + +The ladies of our party found excellent quarters in readiness for them +at the Greek convent in the city; where airy rooms, and plentiful +meals, and wines and sweet-meats delicate and abundant, were provided +to cheer them after the fatigues of their journey. I don’t know whether +the worthy fathers of the convent share in the good things which they +lavish on their guests; but they look as if they do. Those whom we saw +bore every sign of easy conscience and good living; there were a pair +of strong, rosy, greasy, lazy lay- brothers, dawdling in the sun on the +convent terrace, or peering over the parapet into the street below, +whose looks gave one a notion of anything but asceticism. + +In the principal room of the strangers’ house (the lay traveller is not +admitted to dwell in the sacred interior of the convent), and over the +building, the Russian double-headed eagle is displayed. The place is +under the patronage of the Emperor Nicholas; an Imperial Prince has +stayed in these rooms; the Russian consul performs a great part in the +city; and a considerable annual stipend is given by the Emperor towards +the maintenance of the great establishment in Jerusalem. The Great +Chapel of the Church of the Holy Sepulchre is by far the richest, in +point of furniture, of all the places of worship under that roof. We +were in Russia, when we came to visit our friends here; under the +protection of the Father of the Church and the Imperial Eagle! This +butcher and tyrant, who sits on his throne only through the crime of +those who held it before him—every step in whose pedigree is stained by +some horrible mark of murder, parricide, adultery—this padded and +whiskered pontiff—who rules in his jack-boots over a system of spies +and soldiers, of deceit, ignorance, dissoluteness, and brute force, +such as surely the history of the world never told of before—has a +tender interest in the welfare of his spiritual children: in the +Eastern Church ranks after Divinity, and is worshipped by millions of +men. A pious exemplar of Christianity truly! and of the condition to +which its union with politics has brought it! Think of the rank to +which he pretends, and gravely believes that he possesses, no +doubt!—think of those who assumed the same ultra-sacred character +before him!—and then of the Bible and the Founder of the Religion, of +which the Emperor assumes to be the chief priest and defender! + +We had some Poles of our party; but these poor fellows went to the +Latin convent, declining to worship after the Emperor’s fashion. The +next night after our arrival, two of them passed in the Sepulchre. +There we saw them, more than once on subsequent visits, kneeling in the +Latin Church before the pictures, or marching solemnly with candles in +processions, or lying flat on the stones, or passionately kissing the +spots which their traditions have consecrated as the authentic places +of the Saviour’s sufferings. More honest or more civilised, or from +opposition, the Latin fathers have long given up and disowned the +disgusting mummery of the Eastern Fire—which lie the Greeks continue +annually to tell. + +Their travellers’ house and convent, though large and commodious, are +of a much poorer and shabbier condition than those of the Greeks. Both +make believe not to take money; but the traveller is expected to pay in +each. The Latin fathers enlarge their means by a little harmless trade +in beads and crosses, and mother-of-pearl shells, on which figures of +saints are engraved; and which they purchase from the manufacturers, +and vend at a small profit. The English, until of late, used to be +quartered in these sham inns; but last year two or three Maltese took +houses for the reception of tourists, who can now be accommodated with +cleanly and comfortable board, at a rate not too heavy for most +pockets. + +To one of these we went very gladly; giving our horses the bridle at +the door, which went off of their own will to their stables, through +the dark inextricable labyrinths of streets, archways, and alleys, +which we had threaded after leaving the main street from the Jaffa +Gate. There, there was still some life. Numbers of persons were +collected at their doors, or smoking before the dingy coffee-houses, +where singing and story-telling were going on; but out of this great +street everything was silent, and no sign of a light from the windows +of the low houses which we passed. + +We ascended from a lower floor up to a terrace, on which were several +little domed chambers, or pavilions. From this terrace, whence we +looked in the morning, a great part of the city spread before us:- +white domes upon domes, and terraces of the same character as our own. +Here and there, from among these whitewashed mounds round about, a +minaret rose, or a rare date-tree; but the chief part of the vegetation +near was that odious tree the prickly pear,—one huge green wart growing +out of another, armed with spikes, as inhospitable as the aloe, without +shelter or beauty. To the right the Mosque of Omar rose; the rising sun +behind it. Yonder steep tortuous lane before us, flanked by ruined +walls on either side, has borne, time out of mind, the title of Via +Dolorosa; and tradition has fixed the spots where the Saviour rested, +bearing his cross to Calvary. But of the mountain, rising immediately +in front of us, a few grey olive-trees speckling the yellow side here +and there, there can be no question. That is the Mount of Olives. +Bethany lies beyond it. The most sacred eyes that ever looked on this +world have gazed on those ridges: it was there He used to walk and +teach. With shame and humility one looks towards the spot where that +inexpressible Love and Benevolence lived and breathed; where the great +yearning heart of the Saviour interceded for all our race; and whence +the bigots and traitors of his day led Him away to kill Him! + +That company of Jews whom we had brought with us from Constantinople, +and who had cursed every delay on the route, not from impatience to +view the Holy City, but from rage at being obliged to purchase dear +provisions for their maintenance on ship- board, made what bargains +they best could at Jaffa, and journeyed to the Valley of Jehoshaphat at +the cheapest rate. We saw the tall form of the old Polish Patriarch, +venerable in filth, stalking among the stinking ruins of the Jewish +quarter. The sly old Rabbi, in the greasy folding hat, who would not +pay to shelter his children from the storm off Beyrout, greeted us in +the bazaars; the younger Rabbis were furbished up with some smartness. +We met them on Sunday at the kind of promenade by the walls of the +Bethlehem Gate; they were in company of some red-bearded +co-religionists, smartly attired in Eastern raiment; but their voice +was the voice of the Jews of Berlin, and of course as we passed they +were talking about so many hundert thaler. You may track one of the +people, and be sure to hear mention of that silver calf that they +worship. + +The English mission has been very unsuccessful with these religionists. +I don’t believe the Episcopal apparatus—the chaplains, and the +colleges, and the beadles—have succeeded in converting a dozen of them; +and a sort of martyrdom is in store for the luckless Hebrews at +Jerusalem who shall secede from their faith. Their old community spurn +them with horror; and I heard of the case of one unfortunate man, whose +wife, in spite of her husband’s change of creed, being resolved, like a +true woman, to cleave to him, was spirited away from him in his +absence; was kept in privacy in the city, in spite of all exertions of +the mission, of the consul and the bishop, and the chaplains and the +beadles; was passed away from Jerusalem to Beyrout, and thence to +Constantinople; and from Constantinople was whisked off into the +Russian territories, where she still pines after her husband. May that +unhappy convert find consolation away from her. I could not help +thinking, as my informant, an excellent and accomplished gentleman of +the mission, told me the story, that the Jews had done only what the +Christians do under the same circumstances. The woman was the daughter +of a most learned Rabbi, as I gathered. Suppose the daughter of the +Rabbi of Exeter, or Canterbury, were to marry a man who turned Jew, +would not her Right Reverend Father be justified in taking her out of +the power of a person likely to hurl her soul to perdition? These poor +converts should surely be sent away to England out of the way of +persecution. We could not but feel a pity for them, as they sat there +on their benches in the church conspicuous; and thought of the scorn +and contumely which attended them without, as they passed, in their +European dresses and shaven beards, among their grisly, scowling, +long-robed countrymen. + +As elsewhere in the towns I have seen, the Ghetto of Jerusalem is +pre-eminent in filth. The people are gathered round about the dung-gate +of the city. Of a Friday you may hear their wailings and lamentations +for the lost glories of their city. I think the Valley of Jehoshaphat +is the most ghastly sight I have seen in the world. From all quarters +they come hither to bury their dead. When his time is come yonder hoary +old miser, with whom we made our voyage, will lay his carcase to rest +here. To do that, and to claw together money, has been the purpose of +that strange long life. + +We brought with us one of the gentlemen of the mission, a Hebrew +convert, the Rev. Mr. E-; and lest I should be supposed to speak with +disrespect above of any of the converts of the Hebrew faith, let me +mention this gentleman as the only one whom I had the fortune to meet +on terms of intimacy. I never saw a man whose outward conduct was more +touching, whose sincerity was more evident, and whose religious feeling +seemed more deep, real, and reasonable. + +Only a few feet off, the walls of the Anglican Church of Jerusalem rise +up from their foundations on a picturesque open spot, in front of the +Bethlehem Gate. The English Bishop has his church hard by: and near it +is the house where the Christians of our denomination assemble and +worship. + +There seem to be polyglot services here. I saw books of prayer, or +Scripture, in Hebrew, Greek, and German: in which latter language Dr. +Alexander preaches every Sunday. A gentleman who sat near me at church +used all these books indifferently; reading the first lesson from the +Hebrew book, and the second from the Greek. Here we all assembled on +the Sunday after our arrival: it was affecting to hear the music and +language of our country sounding in this distant place; to have the +decent and manly ceremonial of our service; the prayers delivered in +that noble language. Even that stout anti-prelatist, the American +consul, who has left his house and fortune in America in order to +witness the coming of the Millennium, who believes it to be so near +that he has brought a dove with him from his native land (which bird he +solemnly informed us was to survive the expected Advent), was affected +by the good old words and service. He swayed about and moaned in his +place at various passages; during the sermon he gave especial marks of +sympathy and approbation. I never heard the service more excellently +and impressively read than by the Bishop’s chaplain, Mr. Veitch. But it +was the music that was most touching I thought,—the sweet old songs of +home. + +There was a considerable company assembled: near a hundred people I +should think. Our party made a large addition to the usual +congregation. The Bishop’s family is proverbially numerous: the consul, +and the gentlemen of the mission, have wives, and children, and English +establishments. These, and the strangers, occupied places down the +room, to the right and left of the desk and communion-table. The +converts, and the members of the college, in rather a scanty number, +faced the officiating clergyman; before whom the silver maces of the +janissaries were set up, as they set up the beadles’ maces in England. + +I made many walks round the city to Olivet and Bethany, to the tombs of +the kings, and the fountains sacred in story. These are green and +fresh, but all the rest of the landscape seemed to me to be FRIGHTFUL. +Parched mountains, with a grey bleak olive-tree trembling here and +there; savage ravines and valleys, paved with tombstones—a landscape +unspeakably ghastly and desolate, meet the eye wherever you wander +round about the city. The place seems quite adapted to the events which +are recorded in the Hebrew histories. It and they, as it seems to me, +can never be regarded without terror. Fear and blood, crime and +punishment, follow from page to page in frightful succession. There is +not a spot at which you look, but some violent deed has been done +there: some massacre has been committed, some victim has been murdered, +some idol has been worshipped with bloody and dreadful rites. Not far +from hence is the place where the Jewish conqueror fought for the +possession of Jerusalem. “The sun stood still, and hasted not to go +down about a whole day;” so that the Jews might have daylight to +destroy the Amorites, whose iniquities were full, and whose land they +were about to occupy. The fugitive heathen king, and his allies, were +discovered in their hiding-place, and hanged: “and the children of +Judah smote Jerusalem with the edge of the sword, and set the city on +fire; and they left none remaining, but utterly destroyed all that +breathed.” + +I went out at the Zion Gate, and looked at the so-called tomb of David. +I had been reading all the morning in the Psalms, and his history in +Samuel and Kings. “Bring thou down Shimei’s hoar head to the grave with +blood,” are the last words of the dying monarch as recorded by the +history. What they call the tomb is now a crumbling old mosque; from +which Jew and Christian are excluded alike. As I saw it, blazing in the +sunshine, with the purple sky behind it, the glare only served to mark +the surrounding desolation more clearly. The lonely walls and towers of +the city rose hard by. Dreary mountains, and declivities of naked +stones, were round about: they are burrowed with holes in which +Christian hermits lived and died. You see one green place far down in +the valley: it is called En Rogel. Adonijah feasted there, who was +killed by his brother Solomon, for asking for Abishag for wife. The +Valley of Hinnom skirts the hill: the dismal ravine was a fruitful +garden once. Ahaz, and the idolatrous kings, sacrificed to idols under +the green trees there, and “caused their children to pass through the +fire.” On the mountain opposite, Solomon, with the thousand women of +his harem, worshipped the gods of all their nations, “Ashtoreth,” and +“Milcom, and Molech, the abomination of the Ammonites.” An enormous +charnel-house stands on the hill where the bodies of dead pilgrims used +to be thrown; and common belief has fixed upon this spot as the +Aceldama, which Judas purchased with the price of his treason. Thus you +go on from one gloomy place to another, each seared with its bloody +tradition. Yonder is the Temple, and you think of Titus’s soldiery +storming its flaming porches, and entering the city, in the savage +defence of which two million human souls perished. It was on Mount Zion +that Godfrey and Tancred had their camp: when the Crusaders entered the +mosque, they rode knee-deep in the blood of its defenders, and of the +women and children who had fled thither for refuge: it was the victory +of Joshua over again. Then, after three days of butchery, they purified +the desecrated mosque and went to prayer. In the centre of this history +of crime rises up the Great Murder of all . . . + +I need say no more about this gloomy landscape. After a man has seen it +once, he never forgets it—the recollection of it seems to me to follow +him like a remorse, as it were to implicate him in the awful deed which +was done there. Oh! with what unspeakable shame and terror should one +think of that crime, and prostrate himself before the image of that +Divine Blessed Sufferer! + +Of course the first visit of the traveller is to the famous Church of +the Sepulchre. + +In the archway, leading from the street to the court and church, there +is a little bazaar of Bethlehemites, who must interfere considerably +with the commerce of the Latin fathers. These men bawl to you from +their stalls, and hold up for your purchase their devotional +baubles,—bushels of rosaries and scented beads, and carved +mother-of-pearl shells, and rude stone salt-cellars and figures. Now +that inns are established—envoys of these pedlars attend them on the +arrival of strangers, squat all day on the terraces before your door, +and patiently entreat you to buy of their goods. Some worthies there +are who drive a good trade by tattooing pilgrims with the five crosses, +the arms of Jerusalem; under which the name of the city is punctured in +Hebrew, with the auspicious year of the Hadji’s visit. Several of our +fellow- travellers submitted to this queer operation, and will carry to +their grave this relic of their journey. Some of them had engaged as +servant a man at Beyrout, who had served as a lad on board an English +ship in the Mediterranean. Above his tattooage of the five crosses, the +fellow had a picture of two hearts united, and the pathetic motto, +“Betsy my dear.” He had parted with Betsy my dear five years before at +Malta. He had known a little English there, but had forgotten it. Betsy +my dear was forgotten too. Only her name remained engraved with a vain +simulacrum of constancy on the faithless rogue’s skin: on which was now +printed another token of equally effectual devotion. The beads and the +tattooing, however, seem essential ceremonies attendant on the +Christian pilgrim’s visit; for many hundreds of years, doubtless, the +palmers have carried off with them these simple reminiscences of the +sacred city. That symbol has been engraven upon the arms of how many +Princes, Knights, and Crusaders! Don’t you see a moral as applicable to +them as to the swindling Beyrout horseboy? I have brought you back that +cheap and wholesome apologue, in lieu of any of the Bethlehemite shells +and beads. + +After passing through the porch of the pedlars, you come to the +courtyard in front of the noble old towers of the Church of the +Sepulchre, with pointed arches and Gothic traceries, rude, but rich and +picturesque in design. Here crowds are waiting in the sun, until it +shall please the Turkish guardians of the church-door to open. A swarm +of beggars sit here permanently: old tattered hags with long veils, +ragged children, blind old bearded beggars, who raise up a chorus of +prayers for money, holding out their wooden bowls, or clattering with +their sticks on the stones, or pulling your coat-skirts and moaning and +whining; yonder sit a group of coal-black Coptish pilgrims, with robes +and turbans of dark blue, fumbling their perpetual beads. A party of +Arab Christians have come up from their tents or villages: the men +half-naked, looking as if they were beggars, or banditti, upon +occasion; the women have flung their head-cloths back, and are looking +at the strangers under their tattooed eyebrows. As for the strangers, +there is no need to describe THEM: that figure of the Englishman, with +his hands in his pockets, has been seen all the world over: staring +down the crater of Vesuvius, or into a Hottentot kraal—or at a pyramid, +or a Parisian coffee-house, or an Esquimaux hut—with the same insolent +calmness of demeanour. When the gates of the church are open, he elbows +in among the first, and flings a few scornful piastres to the Turkish +door-keeper; and gazes round easily at the place, in which people of +every other nation in the world are in tears, or in rapture, or wonder. +He has never seen the place until now, and looks as indifferent as the +Turkish guardian who sits in the doorway, and swears at the people as +they pour in. + +Indeed, I believe it is impossible for us to comprehend the source and +nature of the Roman Catholic devotion. I once went into a church at +Rome at the request of a Catholic friend, who described the interior to +be so beautiful and glorious, that he thought (he said) it must be like +heaven itself. I found walls hung with cheap stripes of pink and white +calico, altars covered with artificial flowers, a number of wax +candles, and plenty of gilt-paper ornaments. The place seemed to me +like a shabby theatre; and here was my friend on his knees at my side, +plunged in a rapture of wonder and devotion. + +I could get no better impression out of this the most famous church in +the world. The deceits are too open and flagrant; the inconsistencies +and contrivances too monstrous. It is hard even to sympathise with +persons who receive them as genuine; and though (as I know and saw in +the case of my friend at Rome) the believer’s life may be passed in the +purest exercise of faith and charity, it is difficult even to give him +credit for honesty, so barefaced seem the impostures which he professes +to believe and reverence. It costs one no small effort even to admit +the possibility of a Catholic’s credulity: to share in his rapture and +devotion is still further out of your power; and I could get from this +church no other emotions but those of shame and pain. + +The legends with which the Greeks and Latins have garnished the spot +have no more sacredness for you than the hideous, unreal, barbaric +pictures and ornaments which they have lavished on it. Look at the +fervour with which pilgrims kiss and weep over a tawdry Gothic +painting, scarcely better fashioned than an idol in a South Sea Morai. +The histories which they are called upon to reverence are of the same +period and order,—savage Gothic caricatures. In either a saint appears +in the costume of the middle ages, and is made to accommodate himself +to the fashion of the tenth century. + +The different churches battle for the possession of the various relics. +The Greeks show you the Tomb of Melchisedec, while the Armenians +possess the Chapel of the Penitent Thief; the poor Copts (with their +little cabin of a chapel) can yet boast of possessing the thicket in +which Abraham caught the Ram, which was to serve as the vicar of Isaac; +the Latins point out the Pillar to which the Lord was bound. The place +of the Invention of the Sacred Cross, the Fissure in the Rock of +Golgotha, the Tomb of Adam himself—are all here within a few yards’ +space. You mount a few steps, and are told it is Calvary upon which you +stand. All this in the midst of blaring candles, reeking incense, +savage pictures of Scripture story, or portraits of kings who have been +benefactors to the various chapels; a din and clatter of strange +people,—these weeping, bowing, kissing,—those utterly indifferent; and +the priests clad in outlandish robes, snuffling and chanting +incomprehensible litanies, robing, disrobing, lighting up candles or +extinguishing them, advancing, retreating, bowing with all sorts of +unfamiliar genuflexions. Had it pleased the inventors of the Sepulchre +topography to have fixed on fifty more spots of ground as the places of +the events of the sacred story, the pilgrim would have believed just as +now. The priest’s authority has so mastered his faith, that it +accommodates itself to any demand upon it; and the English stranger +looks on the scene, for the first time, with a feeling of scorn, +bewilderment, and shame at that grovelling credulity, those strange +rites and ceremonies, that almost confessed imposture. + +Jarred and distracted by these, the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, for +some time, seems to an Englishman the least sacred spot about +Jerusalem. It is the lies, and the legends, and the priests, and their +quarrels, and their ceremonies, which keep the Holy Place out of sight. +A man has not leisure to view it, for the brawling of the guardians of +the spot. The Roman conquerors, they say, raised up a statue of Venus +in this sacred place, intending to destroy all memory of it. I don’t +think the heathen was as criminal as the Christian is now. To deny and +disbelieve, is not so bad as to make belief a ground to cheat upon. The +liar Ananias perished for that; and yet out of these gates, where +angels may have kept watch—out of the tomb of Christ—Christian priests +issue with a lie in their hands. What a place to choose for imposture, +good God! to sully with brutal struggles for self-aggrandisement or +shameful schemes of gain! + +The situation of the Tomb (into which, be it authentic or not, no man +can enter without a shock of breathless fear, and deep and awful +self-humiliation) must have struck all travellers. It stands in the +centre of the arched rotunda, which is common to all denominations, and +from which branch off the various chapels belonging to each particular +sect. In the Coptic chapel I saw one coal-black Copt, in blue robes, +cowering in the little cabin, surrounded by dingy lamps, barbarous +pictures, and cheap faded trumpery. In the Latin Church there was no +service going on, only two fathers dusting the mouldy gewgaws along the +brown walls, and laughing to one another. The gorgeous church of the +Fire impostors, hard by, was always more fully attended; as was that of +their wealthy neighbours, the Armenians. These three main sects hate +each other; their quarrels are interminable; each bribes and intrigues +with the heathen lords of the soil, to the prejudice of his neighbour. +Now it is the Latins who interfere, and allow the common church to go +to ruin, because the Greeks purpose to roof it; now the Greeks demolish +a monastery on Mount Olivet, and leave the ground to the Turks, rather +than allow the Armenians to possess it. On another occasion, the Greeks +having mended the Armenian steps which lead to the (so-called) Cave of +the Nativity at Bethlehem, the latter asked for permission to destroy +the work of the Greeks, and did so. And so round this sacred spot, the +centre of Christendom, the representatives of the three great sects +worship under one roof, and hate each other! + +Above the Tomb of the Saviour, the cupola is OPEN, and you see the blue +sky overhead. Which of the builders was it that had the grace to leave +that under the high protection of Heaven, and not confine it under the +mouldering old domes and roofs, which cover so much selfishness, and +uncharitableness, and imposture? + +We went to Bethlehem, too; and saw the apocryphal wonders there. + +Five miles’ ride brings you from Jerusalem to it, over naked wavy +hills; the aspect of which, however, grows more cheerful as you +approach the famous village. We passed the Convent of Mar Elyas on the +road, walled and barred like a fort. In spite of its strength, however, +it has more than once been stormed by the Arabs, and the luckless +fathers within put to death. Hard by was Rebecca’s Well: a dead body +was lying there, and crowds of male and female mourners dancing and +howling round it. Now and then a little troop of savage scowling +horsemen—a shepherd driving his black sheep, his gun over his +shoulder—a troop of camels—or of women, with long blue robes and white +veils, bearing pitchers, and staring at the strangers with their great +solemn eyes—or a company of labourers, with their donkeys, bearing +grain or grapes to the city,—met us and enlivened the little ride. It +was a busy and cheerful scene. The Church of the Nativity, with the +adjoining convents, forms a vast and noble Christian structure. A party +of travellers were going to the Jordan that day, and scores of their +followers—of the robbing Arabs, who profess to protect them +(magnificent figures some of them, with flowing haicks and turbans, +with long guns and scimitars, and wretched horses, covered with gaudy +trappings), were standing on the broad pavement before the little +convent gate. It was such a scene as Cattermole might paint. Knights +and Crusaders may have witnessed a similar one. You could fancy them +issuing out of the narrow little portal, and so greeted by the swarms +of swarthy clamorous women and merchants and children. + +The scene within the building was of the same Gothic character. We were +entertained by the Superior of the Greek Convent, in a fine refectory, +with ceremonies and hospitalities that pilgrims of the middle ages +might have witnessed. We were shown over the magnificent Barbaric +Church, visited of course the Grotto where the Blessed Nativity is said +to have taken place, and the rest of the idols set up for worship by +the clumsy legend. When the visit was concluded, the party going to the +Dead Sea filed off with their armed attendants; each individual +traveller making as brave a show as he could, and personally accoutred +with warlike swords and pistols. The picturesque crowds, and the Arabs +and the horsemen, in the sunshine; the noble old convent, and the +grey-bearded priests, with their feast; and the church, and its +pictures and columns, and incense; the wide brown hills spreading round +the village; with the accidents of the road,—flocks and shepherds, +wells and funerals, and camel-trains,—have left on my mind a brilliant, +romantic, and cheerful picture. But you, dear M-, without visiting the +place, have imagined one far finer; and Bethlehem, where the Holy Child +was born, and the angels sang, “Glory to God in the highest, and on +earth peace and goodwill towards men,” is the most sacred and beautiful +spot in the earth to you. + +By far the most comfortable quarters in Jerusalem are those of the +Armenians, in their convent of St. James. Wherever we have been, these +Eastern quakers look grave, and jolly, and sleek. Their convent at +Mount Zion is big enough to contain two or three thousand of their +faithful; and their church is ornamented by the most rich and hideous +gifts ever devised by uncouth piety. Instead of a bell, the fat monks +of the convent beat huge noises on a board, and drub the faithful in to +prayers. I never saw men more lazy and rosy than these reverend +fathers, kneeling in their comfortable matted church, or sitting in +easy devotion. Pictures, images, gilding, tinsel, wax candles, twinkle +all over the place; and ten thousand ostrichs’ eggs (or any lesser +number you may allot) dangle from the vaulted ceiling. There were great +numbers of people at worship in this gorgeous church: they went on +their knees, kissing the walls with much fervour, and paying reverence +to the most precious relic of the convent,—the chair of St. James, +their patron, the first Bishop of Jerusalem. + +The chair pointed out with greatest pride in the church of the Latin +Convent, is that shabby red damask one appropriated to the French +Consul,—the representative of the King of that nation,—and the +protection which it has from time immemorial accorded to the Christians +of the Latin rite in Syria. All French writers and travellers speak of +this protection with delightful complacency. Consult the French books +of travel on the subject, and any Frenchman whom you may meet: he says, +“La France, Monsieur, de tous les temps protege les Chretiens +d’Orient;” and the little fellow looks round the church with a sweep of +the arm, and protects it accordingly. It is bon ton for them to go in +processions; and you see them on such errands, marching with long +candles, as gravely as may be. But I have never been able to edify +myself with their devotion; and the religious outpourings of Lamartine +and Chateaubriand, which we have all been reading a propos of the +journey we are to make, have inspired me with an emotion anything but +respectful. “Voyez comme M. de Chateaubriand prie Dieu,” the Viscount’s +eloquence seems always to say. There is a sanctified grimace about the +little French pilgrim which it is very difficult to contemplate +gravely. + +The pictures, images, and ornaments of the principal Latin convent are +quite mean and poor, compared to the wealth of the Armenians. The +convent is spacious, but squalid. Many hopping and crawling plagues are +said to attack the skins of pilgrims who sleep there. It is laid out in +courts and galleries, the mouldy doors of which are decorated with +twopenny pictures of favourite saints and martyrs; and so great is the +shabbiness and laziness, that you might fancy yourself in a convent in +Italy. Brown-clad fathers, dirty, bearded, and sallow, go gliding about +the corridors. The relic manufactory before mentioned carries on a +considerable business, and despatches bales of shells, crosses, and +beads to believers in Europe. These constitute the chief revenue of the +convent now. La France is no longer the most Christian kingdom, and her +protection of the Latins is not good for much since Charles X. was +expelled; and Spain, which used likewise to be generous on occasions +(the gifts, arms, candlesticks, baldaquins of the Spanish sovereigns +figure pretty frequently in the various Latin chapels), has been stingy +since the late disturbances, the spoliation of the clergy, &c. After we +had been taken to see the humble curiosities of the place, the Prior +treated us in his wooden parlour with little glasses of pink Rosolio, +brought with many bows and genuflexions by his reverence the convent +butler. + +After this community of holy men, the most important perhaps is the +American Convent, a Protestant congregation of Independents chiefly, +who deliver tracts, propose to make converts, have meetings of their +own, and also swell the little congregation that attends the Anglican +service. I have mentioned our fellow- traveller, the Consul-General for +Syria of the United States. He was a tradesman, who had made a +considerable fortune, and lived at a country-house in comfortable +retirement. But his opinion is, that the prophecies of Scripture are +about to be accomplished; that the day of the return of the Jews is at +hand, and the glorification of the restored Jerusalem. He is to witness +this—he and a favourite dove with which he travels; and he forsook home +and comfortable country-house, in order to make this journey. He has no +other knowledge of Syria but what he derives from the prophecy; and +this (as he takes the office gratis) has been considered a sufficient +reason for his appointment by the United States Government. As soon as +he arrived, he sent and demanded an interview with the Pasha; explained +to him his interpretation of the Apocalypse, in which he has discovered +that the Five Powers and America are about to intervene in Syrian +affairs, and the infallible return of the Jews to Palestine. The news +must have astonished the Lieutenant of the Sublime Porte; and since the +days of the Kingdom of Munster, under his Anabaptist Majesty, John of +Leyden, I doubt whether any Government has received or appointed so +queer an ambassador. The kind, worthy, simple man took me to his +temporary consulate-house at the American Missionary Establishment; +and, under pretence of treating me to white wine, expounded his ideas; +talked of futurity as he would about an article in The Times; and had +no more doubt of seeing a divine kingdom established in Jerusalem than +you that there would be a levee next spring at St. James’s. The little +room in which we sat was padded with missionary tracts, but I heard of +scarce any converts—not more than are made by our own Episcopal +establishment. + +But if the latter’s religious victories are small, and very few people +are induced by the American tracts, and the English preaching and +catechising, to forsake their own manner of worshipping the Divine +Being in order to follow ours; yet surely our religious colony of men +and women can’t fail to do good, by the sheer force of good example, +pure life, and kind offices. The ladies of the mission have numbers of +clients, of all persuasions, in the town, to whom they extend their +charities. Each of their houses is a model of neatness, and a +dispensary of gentle kindnesses; and the ecclesiastics have formed a +modest centre of civilisation in the place. A dreary joke was made in +the House of Commons about Bishop Alexander and the Bishopess his lady, +and the Bishoplings his numerous children, who were said to have +scandalised the people of Jerusalem. That sneer evidently came from the +Latins and Greeks; for what could the Jews and Turks care because an +English clergyman had a wife and children as their own priests have? +There was no sort of ill will exhibited towards them, as far as I could +learn; and I saw the Bishop’s children riding about the town as safely +as they could about Hyde Park. All Europeans, indeed, seemed to me to +be received with forbearance, and almost courtesy, within the walls. As +I was going about making sketches, the people would look on very +good-humouredly, without offering the least interruption; nay, two or +three were quite ready to stand still for such an humble portrait as my +pencil could make of them; and the sketch done, it was passed from one +person to another, each making his comments, and signifying a very +polite approval. Here are a pair of them, {2} Fath Allah and Ameenut +Daoodee his father, horse-dealers by trade, who came and sat with us at +the inn, and smoked pipes (the sun being down), while the original of +the above masterpiece was made. With the Arabs outside the walls, +however, and the freshly arriving country people, this politeness was +not so much exhibited. There was a certain tattooed girl, with black +eyes and huge silver earrings, and a chin delicately picked out with +blue, who formed one of a group of women outside the great convent, +whose likeness I longed to carry off;— there was a woman with a little +child, with wondering eyes, drawing water at the Pool of Siloam, in +such an attitude and dress as Rebecca may have had when Isaac’s +lieutenant asked her for drink:- both of these parties standing still +for half a minute, at the next cried out for backsheesh: and not +content with the five piastres which I gave them individually, screamed +out for more, and summoned their friends, who screamed out backsheesh +too. I was pursued into the convent by a dozen howling women calling +for pay, barring the door against them, to the astonishment of the +worthy papa who kept it; and at Miriam’s Well the women were joined by +a man with a large stick, who backed their petition. But him we could +afford to laugh at, for we were two and had sticks likewise. + +In the village of Siloam I would not recommend the artist to loiter. A +colony of ruffians inhabit the dismal place, who have guns as well as +sticks at need. Their dogs howl after the strangers as they pass +through; and over the parapets of their walls you are saluted by the +scowls of a villanous set of countenances, that it is not good to see +with one pair of eyes. They shot a man at mid-day at a few hundred +yards from the gates while we were at Jerusalem, and no notice was +taken of the murder. Hordes of Arab robbers infest the neighbourhood of +the city, with the Sheikhs of whom travellers make terms when minded to +pursue their journey. I never could understand why the walls stopped +these warriors if they had a mind to plunder the city, for there are +but a hundred and fifty men in the garrison to man the long lonely +lines of defence. + +I have seen only in Titian’s pictures those magnificent purple shadows +in which the hills round about lay, as the dawn rose faintly behind +them; and we looked at Olivet for the last time from our terrace, where +we were awaiting the arrival of the horses that were to carry us to +Jaffa. A yellow moon was still blazing in the midst of countless +brilliant stars overhead; the nakedness and misery of the surrounding +city were hidden in that beautiful rosy atmosphere of mingling night +and dawn. The city never looked so noble; the mosques, domes, and +minarets rising up into the calm star-lit sky. + +By the gate of Bethlehem there stands one palm-tree, and a house with +three domes. Put these and the huge old Gothic gate as a background +dark against the yellowing eastern sky: the foreground is a deep grey: +as you look into it dark forms of horsemen come out of the twilight: +now there come lanterns, more horsemen, a litter with mules, a crowd of +Arab horseboys and dealers accompanying their beasts to the gate; all +the members of our party come up by twos and threes; and, at last, the +great gate opens just before sunrise, and we get into the grey plains. + +Oh! the luxury of an English saddle! An English servant of one of the +gentlemen of the mission procured it for me, on the back of a little +mare, which (as I am a light weight) did not turn a hair in the course +of the day’s march—and after we got quit of the ugly, stony, +clattering, mountainous Abou Gosh district, into the fair undulating +plain, which stretches to Ramleh, carried me into the town at a +pleasant hand-gallop. A negro, of preternatural ugliness, in a yellow +gown, with a crimson handkerchief streaming over his head, digging his +shovel spurs into the lean animal he rode, and driving three others +before—swaying backwards and forwards on his horse, now embracing his +ears, and now almost under his belly, screaming “yallah” with the most +frightful shrieks, and singing country songs—galloped along ahead of +me. I acquired one of his poems pretty well, and could imitate his +shriek accurately; but I shall not have the pleasure of singing it to +you in England. I had forgotten the delightful dissonance two days +after, both the negro’s and that of a real Arab minstrel, a +donkey-driver accompanying our baggage, who sang and grinned with the +most amusing good-humour. + +We halted, in the middle of the day, in a little wood of olive- trees, +which forms almost the only shelter between Jaffa and Jerusalem, except +that afforded by the orchards in the odious village of Abou Gosh, +through which we went at a double quick pace. Under the olives, or up +in the branches, some of our friends took a siesta. I have a sketch of +four of them so employed. Two of them were dead within a month of the +fatal Syrian fever. But we did not know how near fate was to us then. +Fires were lighted, and fowls and eggs divided, and tea and coffee +served round in tin panikins, and here we lighted pipes, and smoked and +laughed at our ease. I believe everybody was happy to be out of +Jerusalem. The impression I have of it now is of ten days passed in a +fever. + +We all found quarters in the Greek convent at Ramleh, where the monks +served us a supper on a terrace, in a pleasant sunset; a beautiful and +cheerful landscape stretching around; the land in graceful undulations, +the towers and mosques rosy in the sunset, with no lack of verdure, +especially of graceful palms. Jaffa was nine miles off. As we rode all +the morning we had been accompanied by the smoke of our steamer, twenty +miles off at sea. + +The convent is a huge caravanserai; only three or four monks dwell in +it, the ghostly hotel-keepers of the place. The horses were tied up and +fed in the courtyard, into which we rode; above were the living-rooms, +where there is accommodation, not only for an unlimited number of +pilgrims, but for a vast and innumerable host of hopping and crawling +things, who usually persist in partaking of the traveller’s bed. Let +all thin-skinned travellers in the East be warned on no account to +travel without the admirable invention described in Mr. Fellowes’s +book; nay, possibly invented by that enterprising and learned +traveller. You make a sack, of calico or linen, big enough for the +body, appended to which is a closed chimney of muslin, stretched out by +cane hoops, and fastened up to a beam, or against the wall. You keep a +sharp eye to see that no flea or bug is on the look-out, and when +assured of this, you pop into the bag, tightly closing the orifice +after you. This admirable bug-disappointer I tried at Ramleh, and had +the only undisturbed night’s rest I enjoyed in the East. To be sure it +was a short night, for our party were stirring at one o’clock, and +those who got up insisted on talking and keeping awake those who +inclined to sleep. But I shall never forget the terror inspired in my +mind, being shut up in the bug-disappointer, when a facetious +lay-brother of the convent fell upon me and began tickling me. I never +had the courage again to try the anti-flea contrivance, preferring the +friskiness of those animals to the sports of such a greasy grinning wag +as my friend at Ramleh. + +In the morning, and long before sunrise, our little caravan was in +marching order again. We went out with lanterns and shouts of “yallah” +through the narrow streets, and issued into the plain, where, though +there was no moon, there were blazing stars shining steadily overhead. +They become friends to a man who travels, especially under the clear +Eastern sky; whence they look down as if protecting you, solemn, +yellow, and refulgent. They seem nearer to you than in Europe; larger +and more awful. So we rode on till the dawn rose, and Jaffa came in +view. The friendly ship was lying out in waiting for us; the horses +were given up to their owners; and in the midst of a crowd of naked +beggars, and a perfect storm of curses and yells for backsheesh, our +party got into their boats, and to the ship, where we were welcomed by +the very best captain that ever sailed upon this maritime globe, +namely, Captain Samuel Lewis, of the Peninsular and Oriental Company’s +Service. + + + + +CHAPTER XIV +FROM JAFFA TO ALEXANDRIA + + +[From the Providor’s Log-book.] + +Bill of Fare, October 12th. + +Mulligatawny Soup. Salt Fish and Egg Sauce. Roast Haunch of Mutton. +Boiled Shoulder and Onion Sauce. Boiled Beef. Roast Fowls. Pillau +ditto. Ham. Haricot Mutton. Curry and Rice. + +Cabbage. French Beans. Boiled Potatoes. Baked ditto. Damson Tart. Rice +Puddings. Currant ditto. Currant Fritters. + +We were just at the port’s mouth—and could see the towers and buildings +of Alexandria rising purple against the sunset, when the report of a +gun came booming over the calm golden water; and we heard, with much +mortification, that we had no chance of getting pratique that night. +Already the ungrateful passengers had begun to tire of the ship,—though +in our absence in Syria it had been carefully cleansed and purified; +though it was cleared of the swarming Jews who had infested the decks +all the way from Constantinople; and though we had been feasting and +carousing in the manner described above. + +But very early next morning we bore into the harbour, busy with a great +quantity of craft. We passed huge black hulks of mouldering men-of-war, +from the sterns of which trailed the dirty red flag, with the star and +crescent; boats, manned with red-capped seamen, and captains and +steersmen in beards and tarbooshes, passed continually among these old +hulks, the rowers bending to their oars, so that at each stroke they +disappeared bodily in the boat. Besides these, there was a large fleet +of country ships, and stars and stripes, and tricolours, and Union +Jacks; and many active steamers, of the French and English companies, +shooting in and out of the harbour, or moored in the briny waters. The +ship of our company, the “Oriental,” lay there—a palace upon the brine, +and some of the Pasha’s steam-vessels likewise, looking very like +Christian boats; but it was queer to look at some unintelligible +Turkish flourish painted on the stern, and the long-tailed Arabian +hieroglyphics gilt on the paddle-boxes. Our dear friend and comrade of +Beyrout (if we may be permitted to call her so), H.M.S. “Trump,” was in +the harbour; and the captain of that gallant ship, coming to greet us, +drove some of us on shore in his gig. + +I had been preparing myself overnight, by the help of a cigar and a +moonlight contemplation on deck, for sensations on landing in Egypt. I +was ready to yield myself up with solemnity to the mystic grandeur of +the scene of initiation. Pompey’s Pillar must stand like a mountain, in +a yellow plain, surrounded by a grove of obelisks as tall as +palm-trees. Placid sphinxes brooding o’er the Nile—mighty Memnonian +countenances calm—had revealed Egypt to me in a sonnet of Tennyson’s, +and I was ready to gaze on it with pyramidal wonder and hieroglyphic +awe. + +The landing quay at Alexandria is like the dockyard quay at Portsmouth: +with a few score of brown faces scattered among the population. There +are slop-sellers, dealers in marine-stores, bottled-porter shops, +seamen lolling about; flys and cabs are plying for hire; and a yelling +chorus of donkey-boys, shrieking, “Ride, sir!—Donkey, sir!—I say, sir!” +in excellent English, dispel all romantic notions. The placid sphinxes +brooding o’er the Nile disappeared with that shriek of the donkey-boys. +You might be as well impressed with Wapping as with your first step on +Egyptian soil. + +The riding of a donkey is, after all, not a dignified occupation. A man +resists the offer at first, somehow, as an indignity. How is that poor +little, red-saddled, long-eared creature to carry you? Is there to be +one for you, and another for your legs? Natives and Europeans, of all +sizes, pass by, it is true, mounted upon the same contrivance. I waited +until I got into a very private spot, where nobody could see me, and +then ascended—why not say descended, at once?—on the poor little +animal. Instead of being crushed at once, as perhaps the rider +expected, it darted forward, quite briskly and cheerfully, at six or +seven miles an hour; requiring no spur or admonitive to haste, except +the shrieking of the little Egyptian gamin, who ran along by asinus’s +side. + +The character of the houses by which you pass is scarcely Eastern at +all. The streets are busy with a motley population of Jews and +Armenians, slave-driving-looking Europeans, large-breeched Greeks, and +well-shaven buxom merchants, looking as trim and fat as those on the +Bourse or on ’Change; only, among the natives, the stranger can’t fail +to remark (as the Caliph did of the Calenders in the “Arabian Nights”) +that so many of them HAVE ONLY ONE EYE. It is the horrid ophthalmia +which has played such frightful ravages with them. You see children +sitting in the doorways, their eyes completely closed up with the green +sickening sore, and the flies feeding on them. Five or six minutes of +the donkey-ride brings you to the Frank quarter, and the handsome broad +street (like a street of Marseilles) where the principal hotels and +merchants’ houses are to be found, and where the consuls have their +houses, and hoist their flags. The palace of the French Consul-General +makes the grandest show in the street, and presents a great contrast to +the humble abode of the English representative, who protects his +fellow-countrymen from a second floor. + +But that Alexandrian two-pair-front of a Consulate was more welcome and +cheering than a palace to most of us. For there lay certain letters, +with post-marks of HOME upon them; and kindly tidings, the first heard +for two months:- though we had seen so many men and cities since, that +Cornhill seemed to be a year off, at least, with certain persons +dwelling (more or less) in that vicinity. I saw a young Oxford man +seize his despatches, and slink off with several letters, written in a +tight neat hand, and sedulously crossed; which any man could see, +without looking farther, were the handiwork of Mary Ann, to whom he is +attached. The lawyer received a bundle from his chambers, in which his +clerk eased his soul regarding the state of Snooks v. Rodgers, Smith +ats Tomkins, &c. The statesman had a packet of thick envelopes, +decorated with that profusion of sealing-wax in which official +recklessness lavishes the resources of the country: and your humble +servant got just one little modest letter, containing another, written +in pencil characters, varying in size between one and two inches; but +how much pleasanter to read than my Lord’s despatch, or the clerk’s +account of Smith ats Tomkins,—yes, even than the Mary Ann +correspondence! . . . Yes, my dear madam, you will understand me, when +I say that it was from little Polly at home, with some confidential +news about a cat, and the last report of her new doll. + +It is worth while to have made the journey for this pleasure: to have +walked the deck on long nights, and have thought of home. You have no +leisure to do so in the city. You don’t see the heavens shine above you +so purely there, or the stars so clearly. How, after the perusal of the +above documents, we enjoyed a file of the admirable Galignani; and what +O’Connell was doing; and the twelve last new victories of the French in +Algeria; and, above all, six or seven numbers of Punch! There might +have been an avenue of Pompey’s Pillars within reach, and a live sphinx +sporting on the banks of the Mahmoodieh Canal, and we would not have +stirred to see them, until Punch had had his interview and Galignani +was dismissed. + +The curiosities of Alexandria are few, and easily seen. We went into +the bazaars, which have a much more Eastern look than the European +quarter, with its Anglo-Gallic-Italian inhabitants, and Babel-like +civilisation. Here and there a large hotel, clumsy and whitewashed, +with Oriental trellised windows, and a couple of slouching sentinels at +the doors, in the ugliest composite uniform that ever was seen, was +pointed out as the residence of some great officer of the Pasha’s +Court, or of one of the numerous children of the Egyptian Solomon. His +Highness was in his own palace, and was consequently not visible. He +was in deep grief, and strict retirement. It was at this time that the +European newspapers announced that he was about to resign his empire; +but the quidnuncs of Alexandria hinted that a love-affair, in which the +old potentate had engaged with senile extravagance, and the effects of +a potion of hachisch, or some deleterious drug, with which he was in +the habit of intoxicating himself, had brought on that languor and +desperate weariness of life and governing, into which the venerable +Prince was plunged. Before three days were over, however, the fit had +left him, and he determined to live and reign a little longer. A very +few days afterwards several of our party were presented to him at +Cairo, and found the great Egyptian ruler perfectly convalescent. + +This, and the Opera, and the quarrels of the two prime donne, and the +beauty of one of them, formed the chief subjects of conversation; and I +had this important news in the shop of a certain barber in the town, +who conveyed it in a language composed of French, Spanish, and Italian, +and with a volubility quite worthy of a barber of “Gil Blas.” + +Then we went to see the famous obelisk presented by Mehemet Ali to the +British Government, who have not shown a particular alacrity to accept +this ponderous present. The huge shaft lies on the ground, prostrate, +and desecrated by all sorts of abominations. Children were sprawling +about, attracted by the dirt there. Arabs, negroes, and donkey-boys +were passing, quite indifferent, by the fallen monster of a stone—as +indifferent as the British Government, who don’t care for recording the +glorious termination of their Egyptian campaign of 1801. If our country +takes the compliment so coolly, surely it would be disloyal upon our +parts to be more enthusiastic. I wish they would offer the Trafalgar +Square Pillar to the Egyptians; and that both of the huge ugly monsters +were lying in the dirt there side by side. + +Pompey’s Pillar is by no means so big as the Charing Cross trophy. This +venerable column has not escaped ill-treatment either. Numberless +ships’ companies, travelling cockneys, &c., have affixed their rude +marks upon it. Some daring ruffian even painted the name of “Warren’s +blacking” upon it, effacing other inscriptions,— one, Wilkinson says, +of “the second Psammetichus.” I regret deeply, my dear friend, that I +cannot give you this document respecting a lamented monarch, in whose +history I know you take such an interest. + +The best sight I saw in Alexandria was a negro holiday; which was +celebrated outside of the town by a sort of negro village of huts, +swarming with old, lean, fat, ugly, infantine, happy faces, that nature +had smeared with a preparation even more black and durable than that +with which Psammetichus’s base has been polished. Every one of these +jolly faces was on the broad grin, from the dusky mother to the +india-rubber child sprawling upon her back, and the venerable jetty +senior whose wool was as white as that of a sheep in Florian’s +pastorals. + +To these dancers a couple of fellows were playing on a drum and a +little banjo. They were singing a chorus, which was not only singular, +and perfectly marked in the rhythm, but exceeding sweet in the tune. +They danced in a circle; and performers came trooping from all +quarters, who fell into the round, and began waggling their heads, and +waving their left hands, and tossing up and down the little thin rods +which they each carried, and all singing to the very best of their +power. + +I saw the chief eunuch of the Grand Turk at Constantinople pass by- +-(here is an accurate likeness of his beautiful features {2})—but with +what a different expression! Though he is one of the greatest of the +great in the Turkish Empire (ranking with a Cabinet Minister or Lord +Chamberlain here), his fine countenance was clouded with care, and +savage with ennui. + +Here his black brethren were ragged, starving, and happy; and I need +not tell such a fine moralist as you are, how it is the case, in the +white as well as the black world, that happiness (republican leveller, +who does not care a fig for the fashion) often disdains the turrets of +kings, to pay a visit to the “tabernas pauperum.” + +We went the round of the coffee-houses in the evening, both the polite +European places of resort, where you get ices and the French papers, +and those in the town, where Greeks, Turks, and general company resort, +to sit upon uncomfortable chairs, and drink wretched muddy coffee, and +to listen to two or three miserable musicians, who keep up a variation +of howling for hours together. But the pretty song of the niggers had +spoiled me for that abominable music. + + + + +CHAPTER XV +TO CAIRO + + +We had no need of hiring the country boats which ply on the Mahmoodieh +Canal to Atfeh, where it joins the Nile, but were accommodated in one +of the Peninsular and Oriental Company’s fly- boats; pretty similar to +those narrow Irish canal boats in which the enterprising traveller has +been carried from Dublin to Ballinasloe. The present boat was, to be +sure, tugged by a little steamer, so that the Egyptian canal is ahead +of the Irish in so far: in natural scenery, the one prospect is fully +equal to the other; it must be confessed that there is nothing to see. +In truth, there was nothing but this: you saw a muddy bank on each side +of you, and a blue sky overhead. A few round mud-huts and palm-trees +were planted along the line here and there. Sometimes we would see, on +the water-side, a woman in a blue robe, with her son by her, in that +tight brown costume with which Nature had supplied him. Now, it was a +hat dropped by one of the party into the water; a brown Arab plunged +and disappeared incontinently after the hat, re-issued from the muddy +water, prize in hand, and ran naked after the little steamer (which was +by this time far ahead of him), his brawny limbs shining in the sun: +then we had half-cold fowls and bitter ale: then we had dinner—bitter +ale and cold fowls; with which incidents the day on the canal passed +away, as harmlessly as if we had been in a Dutch trackschuyt. + +Towards evening we arrived at the town of Atfeh—half land, half houses, +half palm-trees, with swarms of half-naked people crowding the rustic +shady bazaars, and bartering their produce of fruit or many-coloured +grain. Here the canal came to a check, ending abruptly with a large +lock. A little fleet of masts and country ships were beyond the lock, +and it led into THE NILE. + +After all, it is something to have seen these red waters. It is only +low green banks, mud-huts, and palm-clumps, with the sun setting red +behind them, and the great, dull, sinuous river flashing here and there +in the light. But it is the Nile, the old Saturn of a stream—a divinity +yet, though younger river-gods have deposed him. Hail! O venerable +father of crocodiles! We were all lost in sentiments of the profoundest +awe and respect; which we proved by tumbling down into the cabin of the +Nile steamer that was waiting to receive us, and fighting and cheating +for sleeping- berths. + +At dawn in the morning we were on deck; the character had not altered +of the scenery about the river. Vast flat stretches of land were on +either side, recovering from the subsiding inundations: near the mud +villages, a country ship or two was roosting under the date-trees; the +landscape everywhere stretching away level and lonely. In the sky in +the east was a long streak of greenish light, which widened and rose +until it grew to be of an opal colour, then orange; then, behold, the +round red disc of the sun rose flaming up above the horizon. All the +water blushed as he got up; the deck was all red; the steersman gave +his helm to another, and prostrated himself on the deck, and bowed his +head eastward, and praised the Maker of the sun: it shone on his white +turban as he was kneeling, and gilt up his bronzed face, and sent his +blue shadow over the glowing deck. The distances, which had been grey, +were now clothed in purple; and the broad stream was illuminated. As +the sun rose higher, the morning blush faded away; the sky was +cloudless and pale, and the river and the surrounding landscape were +dazzlingly clear. + +Looking ahead in an hour or two, we saw the Pyramids. Fancy my +sensations, dear M -: two big ones and a little one - + +! ! ! + +There they lay, rosy and solemn in the distance—those old, majestical, +mystical, familiar edifices. Several of us tried to be impressed; but +breakfast supervening, a rush was made at the coffee and cold pies, and +the sentiment of awe was lost in the scramble for victuals. + +Are we so blases of the world that the greatest marvels in it do not +succeed in moving us? Have society, Pall Mall clubs, and a habit of +sneering, so withered up our organs of veneration that we can admire no +more? My sensation with regard to the Pyramids was, that I had seen +them before: then came a feeling of shame that the view of them should +awaken no respect. Then I wanted (naturally) to see whether my +neighbours were any more enthusiastic than myself—Trinity College, +Oxford, was busy with the cold ham: Downing Street was particularly +attentive to a bunch of grapes: Figtree Court behaved with decent +propriety; he is in good practice, and of a Conservative turn of mind, +which leads him to respect from principle les faits accomplis: perhaps +he remembered that one of them was as big as Lincoln’s Inn Fields. But, +the truth is, nobody was seriously moved . . . And why should they, +because of an exaggeration of bricks ever so enormous? I confess, for +my part, that the Pyramids are very big. + +After a voyage of about thirty hours, the steamer brought up at the +quay of Boulak, amidst a small fleet of dirty comfortless cangias, in +which cottons and merchandise were loading and unloading, and a huge +noise and bustle on the shore. Numerous villas, parks, and +country-houses had begun to decorate the Cairo bank of the stream ere +this: residences of the Pasha’s nobles, who have had orders to take +their pleasure here and beautify the precincts of the capital; tall +factory chimneys also rise here; there are foundries and steam-engine +manufactories. These, and the pleasure-houses, stand as trim as +soldiers on parade; contrasting with the swarming, slovenly, close, +tumble-down, Eastern old town, that forms the outport of Cairo, and was +built before the importation of European taste and discipline. + +Here we alighted upon donkeys, to the full as brisk as those of +Alexandria, invaluable to timid riders, and equal to any weight. We had +a Jerusalem pony race into Cairo; my animal beating all the rest by +many lengths. The entrance to the capital, from Boulak, is very +pleasant and picturesque—over a fair road, and the wide- planted plain +of the Ezbekieh; where are gardens, canals, fields, and avenues of +trees, and where the great ones of the town come and take their +pleasure. We saw many barouches driving about with fat Pashas lolling +on the cushions; stately-looking colonels and doctors taking their +ride, followed by their orderlies or footmen; lines of people taking +pipes and sherbet in the coffee-houses; and one of the pleasantest +sights of all,—a fine new white building with HOTEL D’ORIENT written up +in huge French characters, and which, indeed, is an establishment as +large and comfortable as most of the best inns of the South of France. +As a hundred Christian people, or more, come from England and from +India every fortnight, this inn has been built to accommodate a large +proportion of them; and twice a month, at least, its sixty rooms are +full. + +The gardens from the windows give a very pleasant and animated view: +the hotel-gate is besieged by crews of donkey-drivers; the noble +stately Arab women, with tawny skins (of which a simple robe of +floating blue cotton enables you liberally to see the colour) and large +black eyes, come to the well hard by for water: camels are perpetually +arriving and setting down their loads: the court is full of bustling +dragomans, ayahs, and children from India; and poor old venerable +he-nurses, with grey beards and crimson turbans, tending little +white-faced babies that have seen the light at Dumdum or Futtyghur: a +copper-coloured barber, seated on his hams, is shaving a camel-driver +at the great inn-gate. The bells are ringing prodigiously; and +Lieutenant Waghorn is bouncing in and out of the courtyard full of +business. He only left Bombay yesterday morning, was seen in the Red +Sea on Tuesday, is engaged to dinner this afternoon in the Regent’s +Park, and (as it is about two minutes since I saw him in the courtyard) +I make no doubt he is by this time at Alexandria, or at Malta, say, +perhaps, at both. Il en est capable. If any man can be at two places at +once (which I don’t believe or deny) Waghorn is he. + +Six o’clock bell rings. Sixty people sit down to a quasi-French +banquet: thirty Indian officers in moustaches and jackets; ten +civilians in ditto and spectacles; ten pale-faced ladies with ringlets, +to whom all pay prodigious attention. All the pale ladies drink pale +ale, which, perhaps, accounts for it; in fact the Bombay and Suez +passengers have just arrived, and hence this crowding and bustling, and +display of military jackets and moustaches, and ringlets and beauty. +The windows are open, and a rush of mosquitoes from the Ezbekieh +waters, attracted by the wax candles, adds greatly to the excitement of +the scene. There was a little tough old Major, who persisted in +flinging open the windows, to admit these volatile creatures, with a +noble disregard to their sting—and the pale ringlets did not seem to +heed them either, though the delicate shoulders of some of them were +bare. + +All the meat, ragouts, fricandeaux, and roasts, which are served round +at dinner, seem to me to be of the same meat: a black uncertain sort of +viand do these “fleshpots of Egypt” contain. But what the meat is no +one knew: is it the donkey? The animal is more plentiful than any other +in Cairo. + +After dinner, the ladies retiring, some of us take a mixture of hot +water, sugar, and pale French brandy, which is said to be deleterious, +but is by no means unpalatable. One of the Indians offers a bundle of +Bengal cheroots; and we make acquaintance with those honest bearded +white-jacketed Majors and military Commanders, finding England here in +a French hotel kept by an Italian, at the city of Grand Cairo, in +Africa. + +On retiring to bed you take a towel with you into the sacred interior, +behind the mosquito curtains. Then your duty is, having tucked the +curtains closely around, to flap and bang violently with this towel, +right and left, and backwards and forwards, until every mosquito should +have been massacred that may have taken refuge within your muslin +canopy. + +Do what you will, however, one of them always escapes the murder; and +as soon as the candle is out the miscreant begins his infernal droning +and trumpeting; descends playfully upon your nose and face, and so +lightly that you don’t know that he touches you. But that for a week +afterwards you bear about marks of his ferocity, you might take the +invisible little being to be a creature of fancy—a mere singing in your +ears. + +This, as an account of Cairo, dear M-, you will probably be disposed to +consider as incomplete: the fact is, I have seen nothing else as yet. I +have peered into no harems. The magicians, proved to be humbugs, have +been bastinadoed out of town. The dancing-girls, those lovely Alme, of +whom I had hoped to be able to give a glowing and elegant, though +strictly moral, description, have been whipped into Upper Egypt, and as +you are saying in your mind— Well, it ISN’T a good description of +Cairo: you are perfectly right. It is England in Egypt. I like to see +her there with her pluck, enterprise, manliness, bitter ale, and Harvey +Sauce. Wherever they come they stay and prosper. From the summit of +yonder Pyramids forty centuries may look down on them if they are +minded; and I say, those venerable daughters of time ought to be better +pleased by the examination, than by regarding the French bayonets and +General Bonaparte, Member of the Institute, fifty years ago, running +about with sabre and pigtail. Wonders he did, to be sure, and then ran +away, leaving Kleber, to be murdered, in the lurch—a few hundred yards +from the spot where these disquisitions are written. But what are his +wonders compared to Waghorn? Nap massacred the Mamelukes at the +Pyramids: Wag has conquered the Pyramids themselves; dragged the +unwieldy structures a month nearer England than they were, and brought +the country along with them. All the trophies and captives that ever +were brought to Roman triumph were not so enormous and wonderful as +this. All the heads that Napoleon ever caused to be struck off (as +George Cruikshank says) would not elevate him a monument as big. Be +ours the trophies of peace! O my country! O Waghorn! Hae tibi erunt +artes. When I go to the Pyramids I will sacrifice in your name, and +pour out libations of bitter ale and Harvey Sauce in your honour. + +One of the noblest views in the world is to be seen from the citadel, +which we ascended to-day. You see the city stretching beneath it, with +a thousand minarets and mosques,—the great river curling through the +green plains, studded with innumerable villages. The Pyramids are +beyond, brilliantly distinct; and the lines and fortifications of the +height, and the arsenal lying below. Gazing down, the guide does not +fail to point out the famous Mameluke leap, by which one of the corps +escaped death, at the time that His Highness the Pasha arranged the +general massacre of the body. + +The venerable Patriarch’s harem is close by, where he received, with +much distinction, some of the members of our party. We were allowed to +pass very close to the sacred precincts, and saw a comfortable white +European building, approached by flights of steps, and flanked by +pretty gardens. Police and law-courts were here also, as I understood; +but it was not the time of the Egyptian assizes. It would have been +pleasant, otherwise, to see the Chief Cadi in his hall of justice; and +painful, though instructive, to behold the immediate application of the +bastinado. + +The great lion of the place is a new mosque which Mehemet Ali is +constructing very leisurely. It is built of alabaster of a fair white, +with a delicate blushing tinge; but the ornaments are European—the +noble, fantastic, beautiful Oriental art is forgotten. The old mosques +of the city, of which I entered two, and looked at many, are a thousand +times more beautiful. Their variety of ornament is astonishing,—the +difference in the shapes of the domes, the beautiful fancies and +caprices in the forms of the minarets, which violate the rules of +proportion with the most happy daring grace, must have struck every +architect who has seen them. As you go through the streets, these +architectural beauties keep the eye continually charmed: now it is a +marble fountain, with its arabesque and carved overhanging roof, which +you can look at with as much pleasure as an antique gem, so neat and +brilliant is the execution of it; then, you come to the arched entrance +to a mosque, which shoots up like—like what?—like the most beautiful +pirouette by Taglioni, let us say. This architecture is not sublimely +beautiful, perfect loveliness and calm, like that which was revealed to +us at the Parthenon (and in comparison of which the Pantheon and +Colosseum are vulgar and coarse, mere broad-shouldered Titans before +ambrosial Jove); but these fantastic spires, and cupolas, and +galleries, excite, amuse, tickle the imagination, so to speak, and +perpetually fascinate the eye. There were very few believers in the +famous mosque of Sultan Hassan when we visited it, except the +Moslemitish beadle, who was on the look-out for backsheesh, just like +his brother officer in an English cathedral; and who, making us put on +straw slippers, so as not to pollute the sacred pavement of the place, +conducted us through it. + +It is stupendously light and airy; the best specimens of Norman art +that I have seen (and surely the Crusaders must have carried home the +models of these heathenish temples in their eyes) do not exceed its +noble grace and simplicity. The mystics make discoveries at home, that +the Gothic architecture is Catholicism carved in stone— (in which case, +and if architectural beauty is a criterion or expression of religion, +what a dismal barbarous creed must that expressed by the Bethesda +meeting-house and Independent chapels be?)—if, as they would gravely +hint, because Gothic architecture is beautiful, Catholicism is +therefore lovely and right,—why, Mahometanism must have been right and +lovely too once. Never did a creed possess temples more elegant; as +elegant as the Cathedral at Rouen, or the Baptistery at Pisa. + +But it is changed now. There was nobody at prayers; only the official +beadles, and the supernumerary guides, who came for backsheesh. Faith +hath degenerated. Accordingly they can’t build these mosques, or invent +these perfect forms, any more. Witness the tawdry incompleteness and +vulgarity of the Pasha’s new temple, and the woful failures among the +very late edifices in Constantinople! + +However, they still make pilgrimages to Mecca in great force. The +Mosque of Hassan is hard by the green plain on which the Hag encamps +before it sets forth annually on its pious peregrination. It was not +yet its time, but I saw in the bazaars that redoubted Dervish, who is +the master of the Hag—the leader of every procession, accompanying the +sacred camel; and a personage almost as much respected as Mr. O’Connell +in Ireland. + +This fellow lives by alms (I mean the head of the Hag). Winter and +summer he wears no clothes but a thin and scanty white shirt. He wields +a staff, and stalks along scowling and barefoot. His immense shock of +black hair streams behind him, and his brown brawny body is curled over +with black hair, like a savage man. This saint has the largest harem in +the town; he is said to be enormously rich by the contributions he has +levied; and is so adored for his holiness by the infatuated folk, that +when he returns from the Hag (which he does on horseback, the chief +Mollahs going out to meet him and escort him home in state along the +Ezbekieh road), the people fling themselves down under the horse’s +feet, eager to be trampled upon and killed, and confident of heaven if +the great Hadji’s horse will but kick them into it. Was it my fault if +I thought of Hadji Daniel, and the believers in him? + +There was no Dervish of repute on the plain when I passed; only one +poor wild fellow, who was dancing, with glaring eyes and grizzled +beard, rather to the contempt of the bystanders, as I thought, who by +no means put coppers into his extended bowl. On this poor devil’s head +there was a poorer devil still—a live cock, entirely plucked, but +ornamented with some bits of ragged tape and scarlet and tinsel, the +most horribly grotesque and miserable object I ever saw. + +A little way from him, there was a sort of play going on—a clown and a +knowing one, like Widdicombe and the clown with us,—the buffoon +answering with blundering responses, which made all the audience shout +with laughter; but the only joke which was translated to me would make +you do anything but laugh, and shall therefore never be revealed by +these lips. All their humour, my dragoman tells me, is of this +questionable sort; and a young Egyptian gentleman, son of a Pasha, whom +I subsequently met at Malta, confirmed the statement, and gave a detail +of the practices of private life which was anything but edifying. The +great aim of woman, he said, in the much-maligned Orient, is to +administer to the brutality of her lord; her merit is in knowing how to +vary the beast’s pleasures. He could give us no idea, he said, of the +wit of the Egyptian women, and their skill in double entendre; nor, I +presume, did we lose much by our ignorance. What I would urge, humbly, +however, is this—Do not let us be led away by German writers and +aesthetics, Semilassoisms, Hahnhahnisms, and the like. The life of the +East is a life of brutes. The much maligned Orient, I am confident, has +not been maligned near enough; for the good reason that none of us can +tell the amount of horrible sensuality practised there. + +Beyond the Jack-pudding rascal and his audience, there was on the green +a spot, on which was pointed out to me a mark, as of blood. That +morning the blood had spouted from the neck of an Arnaoot soldier, who +had been executed for murder. These Arnaoots are the curse and terror +of the citizens. Their camps are without the city; but they are always +brawling, or drunken, or murdering within, in spite of the rigid law +which is applied to them, and which brings one or more of the +scoundrels to death almost every week. + +Some of our party had seen this fellow borne by the hotel the day +before, in the midst of a crowd of soldiers who had apprehended him. +The man was still formidable to his score of captors: his clothes had +been torn off; his limbs were bound with cords; but he was struggling +frantically to get free; and my informant described the figure and +appearance of the naked, bound, writhing savage, as quite a model of +beauty. + +Walking in the street, this fellow had just before been struck by the +looks of a woman who was passing, and laid hands on her. She ran away, +and he pursued her. She ran into the police-barrack, which was luckily +hard by; but the Arnaoot was nothing daunted, and followed into the +midst of the police. One of them tried to stop him. The Arnaoot pulled +out a pistol, and shot the policeman dead. He cut down three or four +more before he was secured. He knew his inevitable end must be death: +that he could not seize upon the woman: that he could not hope to +resist half a regiment of armed soldiers: yet his instinct of lust and +murder was too strong; and so he had his head taken off quite calmly +this morning, many of his comrades attending their brother’s last +moments. He cared not the least about dying; and knelt down and had his +head off as coolly as if he were looking on at the same ceremony +performed on another. + +When the head was off, and the blood was spouting on the ground, a +married woman, who had no children, came forward very eagerly out of +the crowd, to smear herself with it,—the application of criminals’ +blood being considered a very favourable medicine for women afflicted +with barrenness,—so she indulged in this remedy. + +But one of the Arnaoots standing near said, “What, you like blood, do +you?” (or words to that effect). “Let’s see how yours mixes with my +comrade’s.” And thereupon, taking out a pistol, he shot the woman in +the midst of the crowd and the guards who were attending the execution; +was seized of course by the latter; and no doubt to-morrow morning will +have HIS head off too. It would be a good chapter to write—the Death of +the Arnaoot—but I shan’t go. Seeing one man hanged is quite enough in +the course of a life. J’y ai ete, as the Frenchman said of hunting. + +These Arnaoots are the terror of the town. They seized hold of an +Englishman the other day, and were very nearly pistolling him. Last +week one of them murdered a shopkeeper at Boulak, who refused to sell +him a water-melon at a price which he, the soldier, fixed upon it. So, +for the matter of three-halfpence, he killed the shopkeeper; and had +his own rascally head chopped off, universally regretted by his +friends. Why, I wonder, does not His Highness the Pasha invite the +Arnaoots to a dejeuner at the Citadel, as he did the Mamelukes, and +serve them up the same sort of breakfast? The walls are considerably +heightened since Emin Bey and his horse leapt them, and it is probable +that not one of them would escape. + +This sort of pistol practice is common enough here, it would appear; +and not among the Arnaoots merely, but the higher orders. Thus, a short +time since, one of His Highness’s grandsons, whom I shall call +Bluebeard Pasha (lest a revelation of the name of the said Pasha might +interrupt our good relations with his country)— one of the young Pashas +being rather backward in his education, and anxious to learn +mathematics, and the elegant deportment of civilised life, sent to +England for a tutor. I have heard he was a Cambridge man, and had +learned both algebra and politeness under the Reverend Doctor Whizzle, +of—College. + +One day when Mr. MacWhirter, B.A., was walking in Shoubra Gardens, with +His Highness the young Bluebeard Pasha, inducting him into the usages +of polished society, and favouring him with reminiscences of +Trumpington, there came up a poor fellah, who flung himself at the feet +of young Bluebeard, and calling for justice in a loud and pathetic +voice, and holding out a petition, besought His Highness to cast a +gracious eye upon the same, and see that his slave had justice done +him. + +Bluebeard Pasha was so deeply engaged and interested by his respected +tutor’s conversation, that he told the poor fellah to go to the deuce, +and resumed the discourse which his ill-timed outcry for justice had +interrupted. But the unlucky wight of a fellah was pushed by his evil +destiny, and thought he would make yet another application. So he took +a short cut down one of the garden lanes, and as the Prince and the +Reverend Mr. MacWhirter, his tutor, came along once more engaged in +pleasant disquisition, behold the fellah was once more in their way, +kneeling at the august Bluebeard’s feet, yelling out for justice as +before, and thrusting his petition into the Royal face. + +When the Prince’s conversation was thus interrupted a second time, his +Royal patience and clemency were at an end. “Man,” said he, “once +before I bade thee not to pester me with thy clamour, and lo! you have +disobeyed me,—take the consequences of disobedience to a Prince, and +thy blood be upon thine own head.” So saying, he drew out a pistol and +blew out the brains of that fellah, so that he never bawled out for +justice any more. + +The Reverend Mr. MacWhirter was astonished at this sudden mode of +proceeding: “Gracious Prince,” said he, “we do not shoot an +undergraduate at Cambridge even for walking over a college grass- +plot.—Let me suggest to your Royal Highness that this method of ridding +yourself of a poor devil’s importunities is such as we should consider +abrupt and almost cruel in Europe. Let me beg you to moderate your +Royal impetuosity for the future; and, as your Highness’s tutor, +entreat you to be a little less prodigal of your powder and shot.” + +“O Mollah!” said His Highness, here interrupting his governor’s +affectionate appeal,—“you are good to talk about Trumpington and the +Pons Asinorum, but if you interfere with the course of justice in any +way, or prevent me from shooting any dog of an Arab who snarls at my +heels, I have another pistol; and, by the beard of the Prophet! a +bullet for you too.” So saying he pulled out the weapon, with such a +terrific and significant glance at the Reverend Mr. MacWhirter, that +that gentleman wished himself back in his Combination Room again; and +is by this time, let us hope, safely housed there. + +Another facetious anecdote, the last of those I had from a well- +informed gentleman residing at Cairo, whose name (as many copies of +this book that is to be will be in the circulating libraries there) I +cannot, for obvious reasons, mention. The revenues of the country come +into the august treasury through the means of farmers, to whom the +districts are let out, and who are personally answerable for their +quota of the taxation. This practice involves an intolerable deal of +tyranny and extortion on the part of those engaged to levy the taxes, +and creates a corresponding duplicity among the fellahs, who are not +only wretchedly poor among themselves, but whose object is to appear +still more poor, and guard their money from their rapacious overseers. +Thus the Orient is much maligned; but everybody cheats there: that is a +melancholy fact. The Pasha robs and cheats the merchants; knows that +the overseer robs him, and bides his time, until he makes him disgorge +by the application of the tremendous bastinado; the overseer robs and +squeezes the labourer; and the poverty-stricken devil cheats and robs +in return; and so the government moves in a happy cycle of roguery. + +Deputations from the fellahs and peasants come perpetually before the +august presence, to complain of the cruelty and exactions of the chiefs +set over them: but, as it is known that the Arab never will pay without +the bastinado, their complaints, for the most part, meet with but +little attention. His Highness’s treasury must be filled, and his +officers supported in their authority. + +However, there was one village, of which the complaints were so +pathetic, and the inhabitants so supremely wretched, that the Royal +indignation was moved at their story, and the chief of the village, +Skinflint Beg, was called to give an account of himself at Cairo. + +When he came before the presence, Mehemet Ali reproached him with his +horrible cruelty and exactions; asked him how he dared to treat his +faithful and beloved subjects in this way, and threatened him with +disgrace, and the utter confiscation of his property, for thus having +reduced a district to ruin. + +“Your Highness says I have reduced these fellahs to ruin,” said +Skinflint Beg: “what is the best way to confound my enemies, and to +show you the falsehood of their accusations that I have ruined them?—To +bring more money from them. If I bring you five hundred purses from my +village, will you acknowledge that my people are not ruined yet?” + +The heart of the Pasha was touched: “I will have no more bastinadoing, +O Skinflint Beg; you have tortured these poor people so much, and have +got so little from them, that my Royal heart relents for the present, +and I will have them suffer no farther.” + +“Give me free leave—give me your Highness’s gracious pardon, and I will +bring the five hundred purses as surely as my name is Skinflint Beg. I +demand only the time to go home, the time to return, and a few days to +stay, and I will come back as honestly as Regulus Pasha did to the +Carthaginians,—I will come back and make my face white before your +Highness.” + +Skinflint Beg’s prayer for a reprieve was granted, and he returned to +his village, where he forthwith called the elders together. “O +friends,” he said, “complaints of our poverty and misery have reached +the Royal throne, and the benevolent heart of the Sovereign has been +melted by the words that have been poured into his ears. ‘My heart +yearns towards my people of El Muddee,’ he says; ‘I have thought how to +relieve their miseries. Near them lies the fruitful land of El Guanee. +It is rich in maize and cotton, in sesame and barley; it is worth a +thousand purses; but I will let it to my children for seven hundred, +and I will give over the rest of the profit to them, as an alleviation +for their affliction.’” + +The elders of El Muddee knew the great value and fertility of the lands +of Guanee, but they doubted the sincerity of their governor, who, +however, dispelled their fears, and adroitly quickened their eagerness +to close with the proffered bargain. “I will myself advance two hundred +and fifty purses,” he said; “do you take counsel among yourselves, and +subscribe the other five hundred; and when the sum is ready, a +deputation of you shall carry it to Cairo, and I will come with my +share; and we will lay the whole at the feet of His Highness.” So the +grey-bearded ones of the village advised with one another; and those +who had been inaccessible to bastinadoes, somehow found money at the +calling of interest; and the Sheikh, and they, and the five hundred +purses, set off on the road to the capital. + +When they arrived, Skinflint Beg and the elders of El Muddee sought +admission to the Royal throne, and there laid down their purses. “Here +is your humble servant’s contribution,” said Skinflint, producing his +share; “and here is the offering of your loyal village of El Muddee. +Did I not before say that enemies and deceivers had maligned me before +the august presence, pretending that not a piastre was left in my +village, and that my extortion had entirely denuded the peasantry? See! +here is proof that there is plenty of money still in El Muddee: in +twelve hours the elders have subscribed five hundred purses, and lay +them at the feet of their lord.” + +Instead of the bastinado, Skinflint Beg was instantly rewarded with the +Royal favour, and the former mark of attention was bestowed upon the +fellahs who had maligned him; Skinflint Beg was promoted to the rank of +Skinflint Bey; and his manner of extracting money from his people may +be studied with admiration in a part of the United Kingdom. {3} + +At the time of the Syrian quarrel, and when, apprehending some general +rupture with England, the Pasha wished to raise the spirit of the +fellahs, and relever la morale nationale, he actually made one of the +astonished Arabs a colonel. He degraded him three days after peace was +concluded. The young Egyptian colonel, who told me this, laughed and +enjoyed the joke with the utmost gusto. “Is it not a shame,” he said, +“to make me a colonel at three-and-twenty; I, who have no particular +merit, and have never seen any service?” Death has since stopped the +modest and good-natured young fellow’s further promotion. The death +of—Bey was announced in the French papers a few weeks back. + +My above kind-hearted and agreeable young informant used to discourse, +in our evenings in the Lazaretto at Malta, very eloquently about the +beauty of his wife, whom he had left behind him at Cairo—her brown +hair, her brilliant complexion, and her blue eyes. It is this +Circassian blood, I suppose, to which the Turkish aristocracy that +governs Egypt must be indebted for the fairness of their skin. Ibrahim +Pasha, riding by in his barouche, looked like a bluff jolly-faced +English dragoon officer, with a grey moustache and red cheeks, such as +you might see on a field-day at Maidstone. All the numerous officials +riding through the town were quite as fair as Europeans. We made +acquaintance with one dignitary, a very jovial and fat Pasha, the +proprietor of the inn, I believe, who was continually lounging about +the Ezbekieh garden, and who, but for a slight Jewish cast of +countenance, might have passed any day for a Frenchman. The ladies whom +we saw were equally fair; that is, the very slight particles of the +persons of ladies which our lucky eyes were permitted to gaze on. These +lovely creatures go through the town by parties of three or four, +mounted on donkeys, and attended by slaves holding on at the crupper, +to receive the lovely riders lest they should fall, and shouting out +shrill cries of “Schmaalek,” “Ameenek” (or however else these words may +be pronounced), and flogging off the people right and left with the +buffalo-thong. But the dear creatures are even more closely disguised +than at Constantinople: their bodies are enveloped with a large black +silk hood, like a cab-head; the fashion seemed to be to spread their +arms out, and give this covering all the amplitude of which it was +capable, as they leered and ogled you from under their black masks with +their big rolling eyes. + +Everybody has big rolling eyes here (unless, to be sure, they lose one +of ophthalmia). The Arab women are some of the noblest figures I have +ever seen. The habit of carrying jars on the head always gives the +figure grace and motion; and the dress the women wear certainly +displays it to full advantage. I have brought a complete one home with +me, at the service of any lady for a masqued ball. It consists of a +coarse blue dress of calico, open in front, and fastened with a horn +button. Three yards of blue stuff for a veil; on the top of the veil a +jar to be balanced on the head; and a little black strip of silk to +fall over the nose, and leave the beautiful eyes full liberty to roll +and roam. But such a costume, not aided by any stays or any other +article of dress whatever, can be worn only by a very good figure. I +suspect it won’t be borrowed for many balls next season. + +The men, a tall, handsome, noble race, are treated like dogs. I shall +never forget riding through the crowded bazaars, my interpreter, or +laquais-de-place, ahead of me to clear the way— when he took his whip, +and struck it over the shoulders of a man who could not or would not +make way! + +The man turned round—an old, venerable, handsome face, with awfully sad +eyes, and a beard long and quite grey. He did not make the least +complaint, but slunk out of the way, piteously shaking his shoulder. +The sight of that indignity gave me a sickening feeling of disgust. I +shouted out to the cursed lackey to hold his hand, and forbade him ever +in my presence to strike old or young more; but everybody is doing it. +The whip is in everybody’s hands: the Pasha’s running footman, as he +goes bustling through the bazaar; the doctor’s attendant, as he soberly +threads the crowd on his mare; the negro slave, who is riding by +himself, the most insolent of all, strikes and slashes about without +mercy, and you never hear a single complaint. + +How to describe the beauty of the streets to you!—the fantastic +splendour; the variety of the houses, and archways, and hanging roofs, +and balconies, and porches; the delightful accidents of light and shade +which chequer them: the noise, the bustle, the brilliancy of the crowd; +the interminable vast bazaars with their barbaric splendour. There is a +fortune to be made for painters in Cairo, and materials for a whole +Academy of them. I never saw such a variety of architecture, of life, +of picturesqueness, of brilliant colour, and light and shade. There is +a picture in every street, and at every bazaar stall. Some of these our +celebrated water-colour painter, Mr. Lewis, has produced with admirable +truth and exceeding minuteness and beauty; but there is room for a +hundred to follow him; and should any artist (by some rare occurrence) +read this, who has leisure, and wants to break new ground, let him take +heart, and try a winter in Cairo, where there is the finest climate and +the best subjects for his pencil. + +A series of studies of negroes alone would form a picturebook, +delightfully grotesque. Mounting my donkey to-day, I took a ride to the +desolate noble old buildings outside the city, known as the Tombs of +the Caliphs. Every one of these edifices, with their domes, and courts, +and minarets, is strange and beautiful. In one of them there was an +encampment of negro slaves newly arrived: some scores of them were +huddled against the sunny wall; two or three of their masters lounged +about the court, or lay smoking upon carpets. There was one of these +fellows, a straight-nosed ebony- faced Abyssinian, with an expression +of such sinister good-humour in his handsome face as would form a +perfect type of villany. He sat leering at me, over his carpet, as I +endeavoured to get a sketch of that incarnate rascality. “Give me some +money,” said the fellow. “I know what you are about. You will sell my +picture for money when you get back to Europe; let me have some of it +now!” But the very rude and humble designer was quite unable to depict +such a consummation and perfection of roguery; so flung him a cigar, +which he began to smoke, grinning at the giver. I requested the +interpreter to inform him, by way of assurance of my disinterestedness, +that his face was a great deal too ugly to be popular in Europe, and +that was the particular reason why I had selected it. + +Then one of his companions got up and showed us his black cattle. The +male slaves were chiefly lads, and the women young, well formed, and +abominably hideous. The dealer pulled her blanket off one of them, and +bade her stand up, which she did with a great deal of shuddering +modesty. She was coal black, her lips were the size of sausages, her +eyes large and good-humoured; the hair or wool on this young person’s +head was curled and greased into a thousand filthy little ringlets. She +was evidently the beauty of the flock. + +They are not unhappy: they look to being bought, as many a spinster +looks to an establishment in England; once in a family they are kindly +treated and well clothed, and fatten, and are the merriest people of +the whole community. These were of a much more savage sort than the +slaves I had seen in the horrible market at Constantinople, where I +recollect the following young creature—{2} (indeed it is a very fair +likeness of her) whilst I was looking at her and forming pathetic +conjectures regarding her fate—smiling very good-humouredly, and +bidding the interpreter ask me to buy her for twenty pounds. + +From these Tombs of the Caliphs the Desert is before you. It comes up +to the walls of the city, and stops at some gardens which spring up all +of a sudden at its edge. You can see the first Station- house on the +Suez Road; and so from distance-point to point, could ride thither +alone without a guide. + +Asinus trotted gallantly into this desert for the space of a quarter of +an hour. There we were (taking care to keep our back to the city +walls), in the real actual desert: mounds upon mounds of sand, +stretching away as far as the eye can see, until the dreary prospect +fades away in the yellow horizon! I had formed a finer idea of it out +of “Eothen.” Perhaps in a simoom it may look more awful. The only +adventure that befell in this romantic place was that Asinus’s legs +went deep into a hole: whereupon his rider went over his head, and bit +the sand, and measured his length there; and upon this hint rose up, +and rode home again. No doubt one should have gone out for a couple of +days’ march—as it was, the desert did not seem to me sublime, only +UNCOMFORTABLE. + +Very soon after this perilous adventure the sun likewise dipped into +the sand (but not to rise therefrom so quickly as I had done); and I +saw this daily phenomenon of sunset with pleasure, for I was engaged at +that hour to dine with our old friend J-, who has established himself +here in the most complete Oriental fashion. + +You remember J-, and what a dandy he was, the faultlessness of his +boots and cravats, the brilliancy of his waistcoats and kid-gloves; we +have seen his splendour in Regent Street, in the Tuileries, or on the +Toledo. My first object on arriving here was to find out his house, +which he has taken far away from the haunts of European civilisation, +in the Arab quarter. It is situated in a cool, shady, narrow alley; so +narrow, that it was with great difficulty— His Highness Ibrahim Pasha +happening to pass at the same moment— that my little procession of two +donkeys, mounted by self and valet-de-place, with the two donkey-boys +our attendants, could range ourselves along the wall, and leave room +for the august cavalcade. His Highness having rushed on (with an +affable and good-humoured salute to our imposing party), we made J.’s +quarters; and, in the first place, entered a broad covered court or +porch, where a swarthy tawny attendant, dressed in blue, with white +turban, keeps a perpetual watch. Servants in the East lie about all the +doors, it appears; and you clap your hands, as they do in the dear old +“Arabian Nights,” to summon them. + +This servant disappeared through a narrow wicket, which he closed after +him; and went into the inner chambers, to ask if his lord would receive +us. He came back presently, and rising up from my donkey, I confided +him to his attendant (lads more sharp, arch, and wicked than these +donkey-boys don’t walk the pave of Paris or London), and passed the +mysterious outer door. + +First we came into a broad open court, with a covered gallery running +along one side of it. A camel was reclining on the grass there; near +him was a gazelle, to glad J- with his dark blue eye; and a numerous +brood of hens and chickens, who furnish his liberal table. On the +opposite side of the covered gallery rose up the walls of his long, +queer, many-windowed, many-galleried house. There were wooden lattices +to those arched windows, through the diamonds of one of which I saw two +of the most beautiful, enormous, ogling black eyes in the world, +looking down upon the interesting stranger. Pigeons were flapping, and +hopping, and fluttering, and cooing about. Happy pigeons, you are, no +doubt, fed with crumbs from the henne-tipped fingers of Zuleika! All +this court, cheerful in the sunshine, cheerful with the astonishing +brilliancy of the eyes peering out from the lattice-bars, was as +mouldy, ancient, and ruinous—as any gentleman’s house in Ireland, let +us say. The paint was peeling off the rickety old carved galleries; the +arabesques over the windows were chipped and worn;—the ancientness of +the place rendered it doubly picturesque. I have detained you a long +time in the outer court. Why the deuce was Zuleika there, with the +beautiful black eyes? + +Hence we passed into a large apartment, where there was a fountain; and +another domestic made his appearance, taking me in charge, and +relieving the tawny porter of the gate. This fellow was clad in blue +too, with a red sash and a grey beard. He conducted me into a great +hall, where there was a great, large Saracenic oriel window. He seated +me on a divan; and stalking off, for a moment, returned with a long +pipe and a brass chafing-dish: he blew the coal for the pipe, which he +motioned me to smoke, and left me there with a respectful bow. This +delay, this mystery of servants, that outer court with the camels, +gazelles, and other beautiful-eyed things, affected me prodigiously all +the time he was staying away; and while I was examining the strange +apartment and its contents, my respect and awe for the owner increased +vastly. + +As you will be glad to know how an Oriental nobleman (such as J— +undoubtedly is) is lodged and garnished, let me describe the contents +of this hall of audience. It is about forty feet long, and eighteen or +twenty high. All the ceiling is carved, gilt, painted and embroidered +with arabesques, and choice sentences of Eastern writing. Some Mameluke +Aga, or Bey, whom Mehemet Ali invited to breakfast and massacred, was +the proprietor of this mansion once: it has grown dingier, but, +perhaps, handsomer, since his time. Opposite the divan is a great +bay-window, with a divan likewise round the niche. It looks out upon a +garden about the size of Fountain Court, Temple; surrounded by the tall +houses of the quarter. The garden is full of green. A great palm-tree +springs up in the midst, with plentiful shrubberies, and a talking +fountain. The room beside the divan is furnished with one deal table, +value five shillings; four wooden chairs, value six shillings; and a +couple of mats and carpets. The table and chairs are luxuries imported +from Europe. The regular Oriental dinner is put upon copper trays, +which are laid upon low stools. Hence J- Effendi’s house may be said to +be much more sumptuously furnished than those of the Beys and Agas his +neighbours. + +When these things had been examined at leisure, J- appeared. Could it +be the exquisite of the “Europa” and the “Trois Freres”? A man- -in a +long yellow gown, with a long beard somewhat tinged with grey, with his +head shaved, and wearing on it, first, a white wadded cotton nightcap; +second, a red tarboosh—made his appearance and welcomed me cordially. +It was some time, as the Americans say, before I could “realise” the +semillant J- of old times. + +He shuffled off his outer slippers before he curled up on the divan +beside me. He clapped his hands, and languidly called “Mustapha.” +Mustapha came with more lights, pipes, and coffee; and then we fell to +talking about London, and I gave him the last news of the comrades in +that dear city. As we talked, his Oriental coolness and languor gave +way to British cordiality; he was the most amusing companion of the +club once more. + +He has adapted himself outwardly, however, to the Oriental life. When +he goes abroad he rides a grey horse with red housings, and has two +servants to walk beside him. He wears a very handsome grave costume of +dark blue, consisting of an embroidered jacket and gaiters, and a pair +of trousers, which would make a set of dresses for an English family. +His beard curls nobly over his chest, his Damascus scimitar on his +thigh. His red cap gives him a venerable and Bey-like appearance. There +is no gewgaw or parade about him, as in some of your dandified young +Agas. I should say that he is a Major-General of Engineers, or a grave +officer of State. We and the Turkified European, who found us at +dinner, sat smoking in solemn divan. + +His dinners were excellent; they were cooked by a regular Egyptian +female cook. We had delicate cucumbers stuffed with forced-meats; +yellow smoking pilaffs, the pride of the Oriental cuisine; kid and +fowls a l’Aboukir and a la Pyramide: a number of little savoury plates +of legumes of the vegetable-marrow sort: kibobs with an excellent sauce +of plums and piquant herbs. We ended the repast with ruby pomegranates, +pulled to pieces, deliciously cool and pleasant. For the meats, we +certainly ate them with the Infidel knife and fork; but for the fruit, +we put our hands into the dish and flicked them into our mouths in what +cannot but be the true Oriental manner. I asked for lamb and +pistachio-nuts, and cream- tarts au poivre; but J.’s cook did not +furnish us with either of those historic dishes. And for drink, we had +water freshened in the porous little pots of grey clay, at whose spout +every traveller in the East has sucked delighted. Also, it must be +confessed, we drank certain sherbets, prepared by the two great rivals, +Hadji Hodson and Bass Bey—the bitterest and most delicious of draughts! +O divine Hodson! a camel’s load of thy beer came from Beyrout to +Jerusalem while we were there. How shall I ever forget the joy inspired +by one of those foaming cool flasks? + +We don’t know the luxury of thirst in English climes. Sedentary men in +cities at least have seldom ascertained it; but when they travel, our +countrymen guard against it well. The road between Cairo and Suez is +jonche with soda-water corks. Tom Thumb and his brothers might track +their way across the desert by those landmarks. + +Cairo is magnificently picturesque: it is fine to have palm-trees in +your gardens, and ride about on a camel; but, after all, I was anxious +to know what were the particular excitements of Eastern life, which +detained J-, who is a town-bred man, from his natural pleasures and +occupations in London; where his family don’t hear from him, where his +room is still kept ready at home, and his name is on the list of his +club; and where his neglected sisters tremble to think that their +Frederick is going about with a great beard and a crooked sword, +dressed up like an odious Turk. In a “lark” such a costume may be very +well; but home, London, a razor, your sister to make tea, a pair of +moderate Christian breeches in lieu of those enormous Turkish shulwars, +are vastly more convenient in the long run. What was it that kept him +away from these decent and accustomed delights? + +It couldn’t be the black eyes in the balcony—upon his honour she was +only the black cook, who has done the pilaff, and stuffed the +cucumbers. No, it was an indulgence of laziness such as Europeans, +Englishmen, at least, don’t know how to enjoy. Here he lives like a +languid Lotus-eater—a dreamy, hazy, lazy, tobaccofied life. He was away +from evening parties, he said: he needn’t wear white kid gloves, or +starched neckcloths, or read a newspaper. And even this life at Cairo +was too civilised for him: Englishmen passed through; old acquaintances +would call: the great pleasure of pleasures was life in the +desert,—under the tents, with still more nothing to do than in Cairo; +now smoking, now cantering on Arabs, and no crowd to jostle you; solemn +contemplations of the stars at night, as the camels were picketed, and +the fires and the pipes were lighted. + +The night-scene in the city is very striking for its vastness and +loneliness. Everybody has gone to rest long before ten o’clock. There +are no lights in the enormous buildings; only the stars blazing above, +with their astonishing brilliancy, in the blue peaceful sky. Your +guides carry a couple of little lanterns which redouble the darkness in +the solitary echoing street. Mysterious people are curled up and +sleeping in the porches. A patrol of soldiers passes, and hails you. +There is a light yet in one mosque, where some devotees are at prayers +all night; and you hear the queerest nasal music proceeding from those +pious believers. As you pass the madhouse, there is one poor fellow +still talking to the moon—no sleep for him. He howls and sings there +all the night—quite cheerfully, however. He has not lost his vanity +with his reason: he is a Prince in spite of the bars and the straw. + +What to say about those famous edifices, which has not been better said +elsewhere?—but you will not believe that we visited them, unless I +bring some token from them. Here is one:- {2} + +That white-capped lad skipped up the stones with a jug of water in his +hand, to refresh weary climbers; and squatting himself down on the +summit, was designed as you see. The vast flat landscape stretches +behind him; the great winding river; the purple city, with forts, and +domes, and spires; the green fields, and palm- groves, and speckled +villages; the plains still covered with shining inundations—the +landscape stretches far far away, until it is lost and mingled in the +golden horizon. It is poor work this landscape-painting in print. +Shelley’s two sonnets are the best views that I know of the +Pyramids—better than the reality; for a man may lay down the book, and +in quiet fancy conjure up a picture out of these magnificent words, +which shan’t be disturbed by any pettinesses or mean realities,—such as +the swarms of howling beggars, who jostle you about the actual place, +and scream in your ears incessantly, and hang on your skirts, and bawl +for money. + +The ride to the Pyramids is one of the pleasantest possible. In the +fall of the year, though the sky is almost cloudless above you, the sun +is not too hot to bear; and the landscape, refreshed by the subsiding +inundations, delightfully green and cheerful. We made up a party of +some half-dozen from the hotel, a lady (the kind soda- water provider, +for whose hospitality the most grateful compliments are hereby offered) +being of the company, bent like the rest upon going to the summit of +Cheops. Those who were cautious and wise, took a brace of donkeys. At +least five times during the route did my animals fall with me, causing +me to repeat the desert experiment over again, but with more success. +The space between a moderate pair of legs and the ground, is not many +inches. By eschewing stirrups, the donkey could fall, and the rider +alight on the ground, with the greatest ease and grace. Almost +everybody was down and up again in the course of the day. + +We passed through the Ezbekieh and by the suburbs of the town, where +the garden-houses of the Egyptian noblesse are situated, to Old Cairo, +where a ferry-boat took the whole party across the Nile, with that +noise and bawling volubility in which the Arab people seem to be so +unlike the grave and silent Turks; and so took our course for some +eight or ten miles over the devious tract which the still outlying +waters obliged us to pursue. The Pyramids were in sight the whole way. +One or two thin silvery clouds were hovering over them, and casting +delicate rosy shadows upon the grand simple old piles. Along the track +we saw a score of pleasant pictures of Eastern life:- The Pasha’s +horses and slaves stood caparisoned at his door; at the gate of one +country-house, I am sorry to say, the Bey’s GIG was in waiting,—a most +unromantic chariot; the husbandmen were coming into the city, with +their strings of donkeys and their loads; as they arrived, they stopped +and sucked at the fountain: a column of red-capped troops passed to +drill, with slouched gait, white uniforms, and glittering bayonets. +Then we had the pictures at the quay: the ferryboat, and the red-sailed +river-boat, getting under way, and bound up the stream. There was the +grain market, and the huts on the opposite side; and that beautiful +woman, with silver armlets, and a face the colour of gold, which (the +nose-bag having been luckily removed) beamed solemnly on us Europeans, +like a great yellow harvest moon. The bunches of purpling dates were +pending from the branches; grey cranes or herons were flying over the +cool shining lakes, that the river’s overflow had left behind; water +was gurgling through the courses by the rude locks and barriers formed +there, and overflowing this patch of ground; whilst the neighbouring +field was fast budding into the more brilliant fresh green. Single +dromedaries were stepping along, their riders lolling on their hunches; +low sail-boats were lying in the canals; now, we crossed an old marble +bridge; now, we went, one by one, over a ridge of slippery earth; now, +we floundered through a small lake of mud. At last, at about +half-a-mile off the Pyramid, we came to a piece of water some two-score +yards broad, where a regiment of half-naked Arabs, seizing upon each +individual of the party, bore us off on their shoulders, to the +laughter of all, and the great perplexity of several, who every moment +expected to be pitched into one of the many holes with which the +treacherous lake abounded. + +It was nothing but joking and laughter, bullying of guides, shouting +for interpreters, quarrelling about sixpences. We were acting a farce, +with the Pyramids for the scene. There they rose up enormous under our +eyes, and the most absurd trivial things were going on under their +shadow. The sublime had disappeared, vast as they were. Do you remember +how Gulliver lost his awe of the tremendous Brobdingnag ladies? Every +traveller must go through all sorts of chaffering, and bargaining, and +paltry experiences, at this spot. You look up the tremendous steps, +with a score of savage ruffians bellowing round you; you hear faint +cheers and cries high up, and catch sight of little reptiles crawling +upwards; or, having achieved the summit, they come hopping and bouncing +down again from degree to degree,—the cheers and cries swell louder and +more disagreeable; presently the little jumping thing, no bigger than +an insect a moment ago, bounces down upon you expanded into a panting +Major of Bengal cavalry. He drives off the Arabs with an oath,—wipes +his red shining face with his yellow handkerchief, drops puffing on the +sand in a shady corner, where cold fowl and hard eggs are awaiting him, +and the next minute you see his nose plunged in a foaming beaker of +brandy and soda-water. He can say now, and for ever, he has been up the +Pyramid. There is nothing sublime in it. You cast your eye once more up +that staggering perspective of a zigzag line, which ends at the summit, +and wish you were up there—and down again. Forwards!—Up with you! It +must be done. Six Arabs are behind you, who won’t let you escape if you +would. + +The importunity of these ruffians is a ludicrous annoyance to which a +traveller must submit. For two miles before you reach the Pyramids they +seize on you and never cease howling. Five or six of them pounce upon +one victim, and never leave him until they have carried him up and +down. Sometimes they conspire to run a man up the huge stair, and bring +him, half-killed and fainting, to the top. Always a couple of brutes +insist upon impelling you sternwards; from whom the only means to +release yourself is to kick out vigorously and unmercifully, when the +Arabs will possibly retreat. The ascent is not the least romantic, or +difficult, or sublime: you walk up a great broken staircase, of which +some of the steps are four feet high. It’s not hard, only a little +high. You see no better view from the top than you behold from the +bottom; only a little more river, and sand, and ricefield. You jump +down the big steps at your leisure; but your meditations you must keep +for after-times,—the cursed shrieking of the Arabs prevents all thought +or leisure. + +- And this is all you have to tell about the Pyramids? Oh! for shame! +Not a compliment to their age and size? Not a big phrase,- -not a +rapture? Do you mean to say that you had no feeling of respect and awe? +Try, man, and build up a monument of words as lofty as they are—they, +whom “imber edax” and “aquilo impotens” and the flight of ages have not +been able to destroy. + +- No: be that work for great geniuses, great painters, great poets! +This quill was never made to take such flights; it comes of the wing of +a humble domestic bird, who walks a common; who talks a great deal (and +hisses sometimes); who can’t fly far or high, and drops always very +quickly; and whose unromantic end is, to be laid on a Michaelmas or +Christmas table, and there to be discussed for half-an-hour—let us +hope, with some relish. + +* * * + +Another week saw us in the Quarantine Harbour at Malta, where seventeen +days of prison and quiet were almost agreeable, after the incessant +sight-seeing of the last two months. In the interval, between the 23rd +of August and the 27th of October, we may boast of having seen more men +and cities than most travellers have seen in such a time:- Lisbon, +Cadiz, Gibraltar, Malta, Athens, Smyrna, Constantinople, Jerusalem, +Cairo. I shall have the carpet-bag, which has visited these places in +company with its owner, embroidered with their names; as military flags +are emblazoned, and laid up in ordinary, to be looked at in old age. +With what a number of sights and pictures,—of novel sensations, and +lasting and delightful remembrances, does a man furnish his mind after +such a tour! You forget all the annoyances of travel; but the pleasure +remains with you, through that kind provision of nature by which a man +forgets being ill, but thinks with joy of getting well, and can +remember all the minute circumstances of his convalescence. I forget +what sea-sickness is now: though it occupies a woful portion of my +Journal. There was a time on board when the bitter ale was decidedly +muddy; and the cook of the ship deserting at Constantinople, it must be +confessed his successor was for some time before he got his hand in. +These sorrows have passed away with the soothing influence of time: the +pleasures of the voyage remain, let us hope, as long as life will +endure. It was but for a couple of days that those shining columns of +the Parthenon glowed under the blue sky there; but the experience of a +life could scarcely impress them more vividly. We saw Cadiz only for an +hour; but the white buildings, and the glorious blue sea, how clear +they are to the memory!—with the tang of that gipsy’s guitar dancing in +the market-place, in the midst of the fruit, and the beggars, and the +sunshine. Who can forget the Bosphorus, the brightest and fairest scene +in all the world; or the towering lines of Gibraltar; or the great +piles of Mafra, as we rode into the Tagus? As I write this, and think, +back comes Rhodes, with its old towers and artillery, and that +wonderful atmosphere, and that astonishing blue sea which environs the +island. The Arab riders go pacing over the plains of Sharon, in the +rosy twilight, just before sunrise; and I can see the ghastly Moab +mountains, with the Dead Sea gleaming before them, from the mosque on +the way towards Bethany. The black gnarled trees of Gethsemane lie at +the foot of Olivet, and the yellow ramparts of the city rise up on the +stony hills beyond. + +But the happiest and best of all the recollections, perhaps, are those +of the hours passed at night on the deck, when the stars were shining +overhead, and the hours were tolled at their time, and your thoughts +were fixed upon home far away. As the sun rose I once heard the priest, +from the minaret of Constantinople, crying out, “Come to prayer,” with +his shrill voice ringing through the clear air; and saw, at the same +hour, the Arab prostrate himself and pray, and the Jew Rabbi, bending +over his book, and worshipping the Maker of Turk and Jew. Sitting at +home in London, and writing this last line of farewell, those figures +come back the clearest of all to the memory, with the picture, too, of +our ship sailing over the peaceful Sabbath sea, and our own prayers and +services celebrated there. So each, in his fashion, and after his kind, +is bowing down, and adoring the Father, who is equally above all. Cavil +not, you brother or sister, if your neighbour’s voice is not like +yours; only hope that his words are honest (as far as they may be), and +his heart humble and thankful. + +Footnotes: + +{1} Saint Paul speaking from the Areopagus, and rebuking these +superstitions away, yet speaks tenderly to the people before him, whose +devotions he had marked; quotes their poets, to bring them to think of +the God unknown, whom they had ignorantly worshipped; and says, that +the times of this ignorance God winked at, but that now it was time to +repent. No rebuke can surely be more gentle than this delivered by the +upright Apostle. + +{2} Thackeray’s drawing is shown at this point in the book. + +{3} At Derrynane Beg, for instance. + + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 1863 *** diff --git a/1863-h/1863-h.htm b/1863-h/1863-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d7319b4 --- /dev/null +++ b/1863-h/1863-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,6427 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" +"http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> +<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> +<head> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=utf-8" /> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Style-Type" content="text/css" /> +<title>Notes on a Journey from Cornhill to Grand Cairo | Project Gutenberg</title> + +<style type="text/css" xml:space="preserve"> + +body { margin-left: 20%; + margin-right: 20%; + text-align: justify; } + +h1, h2, h3, h4, h5 {text-align: center; font-style: normal; font-weight: +normal; line-height: 1.5; margin-top: .5em; margin-bottom: .5em;} + +h1 {font-size: 300%; + margin-top: 0.6em; + margin-bottom: 0.6em; + letter-spacing: 0.12em; + word-spacing: 0.2em; + text-indent: 0em;} +h2 {font-size: 150%; margin-top: 2em; margin-bottom: 1em;} +h3 {font-size: 130%; margin-top: 1em;} +h4 {font-size: 120%;} +h5 {font-size: 110%;} + +.no-break {page-break-before: avoid;} /* for epubs */ + +div.chapter {page-break-before: always; margin-top: 4em;} + +hr {width: 80%; margin-top: 2em; margin-bottom: 2em;} + +p {text-indent: 1em; + margin-top: 0.25em; + margin-bottom: 0.25em; } + +a:link {color:blue; text-decoration:none} +a:visited {color:blue; text-decoration:none} +a:hover {color:red} + +</style> +</head> +<body> +<div>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 1863 ***</div> + +<h1>NOTES ON A JOURNEY FROM CORNHILL TO GRAND CAIRO</h1> + +<h2 class="no-break">By William Makepeace Thackeray</h2> + +<hr /> + +<h2>Contents</h2> + +<table summary="" style=""> +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2H_4_0001">DEDICATION</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2H_PREF">PREFACE</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0001">CHAPTER I: VIGO</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0002">CHAPTER II: LISBON—CADIZ</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0003">CHAPTER III: THE “LADY MARY WOOD”</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0004">CHAPTER IV: GIBRALTAR</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0005">CHAPTER V: ATHENS</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0006">CHAPTER VI: SMYRNA—FIRST GLIMPSES OF THE EAST</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0007">CHAPTER VII: CONSTANTINOPLE</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0008">CHAPTER VIII: RHODES</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0009">CHAPTER IX: THE WHITE SQUALL</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0010">CHAPTER X: TELMESSUS—BEYROUT</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0011">CHAPTER XI: A DAY AND NIGHT IN SYRIA</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0012">CHAPTER XII: FROM JAFFA TO JERUSALEM</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0013">CHAPTER XIII: JERUSALEM</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0014">CHAPTER XIV: FROM JAFFA TO ALEXANDRIA</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2HCH0015">CHAPTER XV: TO CAIRO</a></td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td> <a href="#2H_FOOT">Footnotes:</a></td> +</tr> + +</table> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2H_4_0001"></a> +DEDICATION</h2> + +<p> +TO CAPTAIN SAMUEL LEWIS, OF THE PENINSULAR AND ORIENTAL STEAM NAVIGATION +COMPANY’S SERVICE. +</p> + +<p> +My Dear Lewis, +</p> + +<p> +After a voyage, during which the captain of the ship has displayed uncommon +courage, seamanship, affability, or other good qualities, grateful passengers +often present him with a token of their esteem, in the shape of teapots, +tankards, trays, &c. of precious metal. Among authors, however, bullion is +a much rarer commodity than paper, whereof I beg you to accept a little in the +shape of this small volume. It contains a few notes of a voyage which your +skill and kindness rendered doubly pleasant; and of which I don’t think there +is any recollection more agreeable than that it was the occasion of making your +friendship. +</p> + +<p> +If the noble Company in whose service you command (and whose fleet alone makes +them a third-rate maritime power in Europe) should appoint a few admirals in +their navy, I hope to hear that your flag is hoisted on board one of the +grandest of their steamers. But, I trust, even there you will not forget the +“Iberia,” and the delightful Mediterranean cruise we had in her in the Autumn +of 1844. +</p> + +<p> +Most faithfully yours, My dear Lewis, W. M. THACKERAY. LONDON: December 24, +1845. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2H_PREF"></a> +PREFACE</h2> + +<p> +On the 20th of August, 1844, the writer of this little book went to dine at +the—Club, quite unconscious of the wonderful events which Fate had in store for +him. +</p> + +<p> +Mr. William was there, giving a farewell dinner to his friend Mr. James (now +Sir James). These two asked Mr. Titmarsh to join company with them, and the +conversation naturally fell upon the tour Mr. James was about to take. The +Peninsular and Oriental Company had arranged an excursion in the Mediterranean, +by which, in the space of a couple of months, as many men and cities were to be +seen as Ulysses surveyed and noted in ten years. Malta, Athens, Smyrna, +Constantinople, Jerusalem, Cairo were to be visited, and everybody was to be +back in London by Lord Mayor’s Day. +</p> + +<p> +The idea of beholding these famous places inflamed Mr. Titmarsh’s mind; and the +charms of such a journey were eloquently impressed upon him by Mr. James. +“Come,” said that kind and hospitable gentleman, “and make one of my family +party; in all your life you will never probably have a chance again to see so +much in so short a time. Consider—it is as easy as a journey to Paris or to +Baden.” Mr. Titmarsh considered all these things; but also the difficulties of +the situation: he had but six-and-thirty hours to get ready for so portentous a +journey—he had engagements at home— finally, could he afford it? In spite of +these objections, however, with every glass of claret the enthusiasm somehow +rose, and the difficulties vanished. +</p> + +<p> +But when Mr. James, to crown all, said he had no doubt that his friends, the +Directors of the Peninsular and Oriental Company, would make Mr. Titmarsh the +present of a berth for the voyage, all objections ceased on his part: to break +his outstanding engagements—to write letters to his amazed family, stating that +they were not to expect him at dinner on Saturday fortnight, as he would be at +Jerusalem on that day—to purchase eighteen shirts and lay in a sea stock of +Russia ducks,—was the work of four-and- twenty hours; and on the 22nd of +August, the “Lady Mary Wood” was sailing from Southampton with the “subject of +the present memoir,” quite astonished to find himself one of the passengers on +board. +</p> + +<p> +These important statements are made partly to convince some incredulous +friends—who insist still that the writer never went abroad at all, and wrote +the following pages, out of pure fancy, in retirement at Putney; but mainly, to +give him an opportunity of thanking the Directors of the Company in question +for a delightful excursion. +</p> + +<p> +It was one so easy, so charming, and I think profitable—it leaves such a store +of pleasant recollections for after days—and creates so many new sources of +interest (a newspaper letter from Beyrout, or Malta, or Algiers, has twice the +interest now that it had formerly),—that I can’t but recommend all persons who +have time and means to make a similar journey—vacation idlers to extend their +travels and pursue it: above all, young well-educated men entering life, to +take this course, we will say, after that at college; and, having their +book-learning fresh in their minds, see the living people and their cities, and +the actual aspect of Nature, along the famous shores of the Mediterranean. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0001"></a> +CHAPTER I<br/> +VIGO</h2> + +<p> +The sun brought all the sick people out of their berths this morning, and the +indescribable moans and noises which had been issuing from behind the fine +painted doors on each side of the cabin happily ceased. Long before sunrise, I +had the good fortune to discover that it was no longer necessary to maintain +the horizontal posture, and, the very instant this truth was apparent, came on +deck, at two o’clock in the morning, to see a noble full moon sinking westward, +and millions of the most brilliant stars shining overhead. The night was so +serenely pure, that you saw them in magnificent airy perspective; the blue sky +around and over them, and other more distant orbs sparkling above, till they +glittered away faintly into the immeasurable distance. The ship went rolling +over a heavy, sweltering, calm sea. The breeze was a warm and soft one; quite +different to the rigid air we had left behind us, two days since, off the Isle +of Wight. The bell kept tolling its half-hours, and the mate explained the +mystery of watch and dog-watch. +</p> + +<p> +The sight of that noble scene cured all the woes and discomfitures of +sea-sickness at once, and if there were any need to communicate such secrets to +the public, one might tell of much more good that the pleasant morning-watch +effected; but there are a set of emotions about which a man had best be shy of +talking lightly,—and the feelings excited by contemplating this vast, +magnificent, harmonious Nature are among these. The view of it inspires a +delight and ecstasy which is not only hard to describe, but which has something +secret in it that a man should not utter loudly. Hope, memory, humility, tender +yearnings towards dear friends, and inexpressible love and reverence towards +the Power which created the infinite universe blazing above eternally, and the +vast ocean shining and rolling around—fill the heart with a solemn humble +happiness, that a person dwelling in a city has rarely occasion to enjoy. They +are coming away from London parties at this time: the dear little eyes are +closed in sleep under mother’s wing. How far off city cares and pleasures +appear to be! how small and mean they seem, dwindling out of sight before this +magnificent brightness of Nature! But the best thoughts only grow and +strengthen under it. Heaven shines above, and the humble spirit looks up +reverently towards that boundless aspect of wisdom and beauty. You are at home, +and with all at rest there, however far away they may be; and through the +distance the heart broods over them, bright and wakeful like yonder peaceful +stars overhead. +</p> + +<p> +The day was as fine and calm as the night; at seven bells, suddenly a bell +began to toll very much like that of a country church, and on going on deck we +found an awning raised, a desk with a flag flung over it close to the compass, +and the ship’s company and passengers assembled there to hear the Captain read +the Service in a manly respectful voice. This, too, was a novel and touching +sight to me. Peaked ridges of purple mountains rose to the left of the +ship,—Finisterre and the coast of Galicia. The sky above was cloudless and +shining; the vast dark ocean smiled peacefully round about, and the ship went +rolling over it, as the people within were praising the Maker of all. +</p> + +<p> +In honour of the day, it was announced that the passengers would be regaled +with champagne at dinner; and accordingly that exhilarating liquor was served +out in decent profusion, the company drinking the Captain’s health with the +customary orations of compliment and acknowledgment. This feast was scarcely +ended, when we found ourselves rounding the headland into Vigo Bay, passing a +grim and tall island of rocky mountains which lies in the centre of the bay. +</p> + +<p> +Whether it is that the sight of land is always welcome to weary mariners, after +the perils and annoyances of a voyage of three days, or whether the place is in +itself extraordinarily beautiful, need not be argued; but I have seldom seen +anything more charming than the amphitheatre of noble hills into which the ship +now came— all the features of the landscape being lighted up with a wonderful +clearness of air, which rarely adorns a view in our country. The sun had not +yet set, but over the town and lofty rocky castle of Vigo a great ghost of a +moon was faintly visible, which blazed out brighter and brighter as the +superior luminary retired behind the purple mountains of the headland to rest. +Before the general background of waving heights which encompassed the bay, rose +a second semicircle of undulating hills, as cheerful and green as the mountains +behind them were grey and solemn. Farms and gardens, convent towers, white +villages and churches, and buildings that no doubt were hermitages once, upon +the sharp peaks of the hills, shone brightly in the sun. The sight was +delightfully cheerful, animated, and pleasing. +</p> + +<p> +Presently the Captain roared out the magic words, “Stop her!” and the obedient +vessel came to a stand-still, at some three hundred yards from the little town, +with its white houses clambering up a rock, defended by the superior mountain +whereon the castle stands. Numbers of people, arrayed in various brilliant +colours of red, were standing on the sand close by the tumbling, shining, +purple waves: and there we beheld, for the first time, the Royal red and yellow +standard of Spain floating on its own ground, under the guardianship of a light +blue sentinel, whose musket glittered in the sun. Numerous boats were seen, +incontinently, to put off from the little shore. +</p> + +<p> +And now our attention was withdrawn from the land to a sight of great splendour +on board. This was Lieutenant Bundy, the guardian of Her Majesty’s mails, who +issued from his cabin in his long swallow-tailed coat with anchor buttons; his +sabre clattering between his legs; a magnificent shirt-collar, of several +inches in height, rising round his good-humoured sallow face; and above it a +cocked hat, that shone so, I thought it was made of polished tin (it may have +been that or oilskin), handsomely laced with black worsted, and ornamented with +a shining gold cord. A little squat boat, rowed by three ragged gallegos, came +bouncing up to the ship. Into this Mr. Bundy and Her Majesty’s Royal mail +embarked with much majesty; and in the twinkling of an eye, the Royal standard +of England, about the size of a pocket-handkerchief,—and at the bows of the +boat, the man-of-war’s pennant, being a strip of bunting considerably under the +value of a farthing,—streamed out. +</p> + +<p> +“They know that flag, sir,” said the good-natured old tar, quite solemnly, in +the evening afterwards: “they respect it, sir.” The authority of Her Majesty’s +lieutenant on board the steamer is stated to be so tremendous, that he may +order it to stop, to move, to go larboard, starboard, or what you will; and the +captain dare only disobey him suo periculo. +</p> + +<p> +It was agreed that a party of us should land for half-an-hour, and taste real +Spanish chocolate on Spanish ground. We followed Lieutenant Bundy, but humbly +in the providor’s boat; that officer going on shore to purchase fresh eggs, +milk for tea (in place of the slimy substitute of whipped yolk of egg which we +had been using for our morning and evening meals), and, if possible, oysters, +for which it is said the rocks of Vigo are famous. +</p> + +<p> +It was low tide, and the boat could not get up to the dry shore. Hence it was +necessary to take advantage of the offers of sundry gallegos, who rushed +barelegged into the water, to land on their shoulders. The approved method +seems to be, to sit upon one shoulder only, holding on by the porter’s +whiskers; and though some of our party were of the tallest and fattest men +whereof our race is composed, and their living sedans exceedingly meagre and +small, yet all were landed without accident upon the juicy sand, and forthwith +surrounded by a host of mendicants, screaming, “I say, sir! penny, sir! I say, +English! tam your ays! penny!” in all voices, from extreme youth to the most +lousy and venerable old age. When it is said that these beggars were as ragged +as those of Ireland, and still more voluble, the Irish traveller will be able +to form an opinion of their capabilities. +</p> + +<p> +Through this crowd we passed up some steep rocky steps, through a little low +gate, where, in a little guard-house and barrack, a few dirty little sentinels +were keeping a dirty little guard; and by low-roofed whitewashed houses, with +balconies, and women in them,— the very same women, with the very same +head-clothes, and yellow fans and eyes, at once sly and solemn, which Murillo +painted,—by a neat church into which we took a peep, and, finally, into the +Plaza del Constitucion, or grand place of the town, which may be about as big +as that pleasing square, Pump Court, Temple. We were taken to an inn, of which +I forget the name, and were shown from one chamber and storey to another, till +we arrived at that apartment where the real Spanish chocolate was finally to be +served out. All these rooms were as clean as scrubbing and whitewash could make +them; with simple French prints (with Spanish titles) on the walls; a few +rickety half-finished articles of furniture; and, finally, an air of extremely +respectable poverty. A jolly, black-eyed, yellow- shawled Dulcinea conducted us +through the apartment, and provided us with the desired refreshment. +</p> + +<p> +Sounds of clarions drew our eyes to the Place of the Constitution; and, indeed, +I had forgotten to say, that that majestic square was filled with military, +with exceedingly small firelocks, the men ludicrously young and diminutive for +the most part, in a uniform at once cheap and tawdry,—like those supplied to +the warriors at Astley’s, or from still humbler theatrical wardrobes: indeed, +the whole scene was just like that of a little theatre; the houses curiously +small, with arcades and balconies, out of which looked women apparently a great +deal too big for the chambers they inhabited; the warriors were in ginghams, +cottons, and tinsel; the officers had huge epaulets of sham silver lace +drooping over their bosoms, and looked as if they were attired at a very small +expense. Only the general—the captain-general (Pooch, they told us, was his +name: I know not how ’tis written in Spanish)—was well got up, with a smart +hat, a real feather, huge stars glittering on his portly chest, and tights and +boots of the first order. Presently, after a good deal of trumpeting, the +little men marched off the place, Pooch and his staff coming into the very inn +in which we were awaiting our chocolate. +</p> + +<p> +Then we had an opportunity of seeing some of the civilians of the town. Three +or four ladies passed, with fan and mantle; to them came three or four dandies, +dressed smartly in the French fashion, with strong Jewish physiognomies. There +was one, a solemn lean fellow in black, with his collars extremely turned over, +and holding before him a long ivory-tipped ebony cane, who tripped along the +little place with a solemn smirk, which gave one an indescribable feeling of +the truth of “Gil Blas,” and of those delightful bachelors and licentiates who +have appeared to us all in our dreams. +</p> + +<p> +In fact we were but half-an-hour in this little queer Spanish town; and it +appeared like a dream, too, or a little show got up to amuse us. Boom! the gun +fired at the end of the funny little entertainment. The women and the +balconies, the beggars and the walking Murillos, Pooch and the little soldiers +in tinsel, disappeared, and were shut up in their box again. Once more we were +carried on the beggars’ shoulders out off the shore, and we found ourselves +again in the great stalwart roast-beef world; the stout British steamer bearing +out of the bay, whose purple waters had grown more purple. The sun had set by +this time, and the moon above was twice as big and bright as our degenerate +moons are. +</p> + +<p> +The providor had already returned with his fresh stores, and Bundy’s tin hat +was popped into its case, and he walking the deck of the packet denuded of +tails. As we went out of the bay, occurred a little incident with which the +great incidents of the day may be said to wind up. We saw before us a little +vessel, tumbling and plunging about in the dark waters of the bay, with a +bright light beaming from the mast. It made for us at about a couple of miles +from the town, and came close up, flouncing and bobbing in the very jaws of the +paddle, which looked as if it would have seized and twirled round that little +boat and its light, and destroyed them for ever and ever. All the passengers, +of course, came crowding to the ship’s side to look at the bold little boat. +</p> + +<p> +“I SAY!” howled a man; “I say!—a word!—I say! Pasagero! Pasagero! +Pasage-e-ero!” We were two hundred yards ahead by this time. +</p> + +<p> +“Go on,” says the captain. +</p> + +<p> +“You may stop if you like,” says Lieutenant Bundy, exerting his tremendous +responsibility. It is evident that the lieutenant has a soft heart, and felt +for the poor devil in the boat who was howling so piteously “Pasagero!” +</p> + +<p> +But the captain was resolute. His duty was NOT to take the man up. He was +evidently an irregular customer—someone trying to escape, possibly. +</p> + +<p> +The lieutenant turned away, but did not make any further hints. The captain was +right; but we all felt somehow disappointed, and looked back wistfully at the +little boat, jumping up and down far astern now; the poor little light shining +in vain, and the poor wretch within screaming out in the most heartrending +accents a last faint desperate “I say! Pasagero-o!” +</p> + +<p> +We all went down to tea rather melancholy; but the new milk, in the place of +that abominable whipped egg, revived us again; and so ended the great events on +board the “Lady Mary Wood” steamer, on the 25th August, 1844. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0002"></a> +CHAPTER II<br/> +LISBON—CADIZ</h2> + +<p> +A great misfortune which befalls a man who has but a single day to stay in a +town, is that fatal duty which superstition entails upon him of visiting the +chief lions of the city in which he may happen to be. You must go through the +ceremony, however much you may sigh to avoid it; and however much you know that +the lions in one capital roar very much like the lions in another; that the +churches are more or less large and splendid, the palaces pretty spacious, all +the world over; and that there is scarcely a capital city in this Europe but +has its pompous bronze statue or two of some periwigged, hook-nosed emperor, in +a Roman habit, waving his bronze baton on his broad-flanked brazen charger. We +only saw these state old lions in Lisbon, whose roar has long since ceased to +frighten one. First we went to the Church of St. Roch, to see a famous piece of +mosaic-work there. It is a famous work of art, and was bought by I don’t know +what king for I don’t know how much money. All this information may be +perfectly relied on, though the fact is, we did not see the mosaic-work: the +sacristan, who guards it, was yet in bed; and it was veiled from our eyes in a +side-chapel by great dirty damask curtains, which could not be removed, except +when the sacristan’s toilette was done, and at the price of a dollar. So we +were spared this mosaic exhibition; and I think I always feel relieved when +such an event occurs. I feel I have done my duty in coming to see the enormous +animal: if he is not at home, virtute mea me, &c.—we have done our best, +and mortal can do no more. +</p> + +<p> +In order to reach that church of the forbidden mosaic, we had sweated up +several most steep and dusty streets—hot and dusty, although it was but nine +o’clock in the morning. Thence the guide conducted us into some little +dust-powdered gardens, in which the people make believe to enjoy the verdure, +and whence you look over a great part of the arid, dreary, stony city. There +was no smoke, as in honest London, only dust—dust over the gaunt houses and the +dismal yellow strips of gardens. Many churches were there, and tall +half-baked-looking public edifices, that had a dry, uncomfortable, earth-quaky +look, to my idea. The ground-floors of the spacious houses by which we passed +seemed the coolest and pleasantest portions of the mansion. They were cellars +or warehouses, for the most part, in which white-jacketed clerks sat smoking +easy cigars. The streets were plastered with placards of a bull-fight, to take +place the next evening (there was no opera that season); but it was not a real +Spanish tauromachy—only a theatrical combat, as you could see by the picture in +which the horseman was cantering off at three miles an hour, the bull tripping +after him with tips to his gentle horns. Mules interminable, and almost all +excellently sleek and handsome, were pacing down every street: here and there, +but later in the day, came clattering along a smart rider on a prancing Spanish +horse; and in the afternoon a few families might be seen in the queerest +old-fashioned little carriages, drawn by their jolly mules and swinging +between, or rather before, enormous wheels. +</p> + +<p> +The churches I saw were of the florid periwig architecture—I mean of that +pompous cauliflower kind of ornament which was the fashion in Louis the +Fifteenth’s time, at which unlucky period a building mania seems to have seized +upon many of the monarchs of Europe, and innumerable public edifices were +erected. It seems to me to have been the period in all history when society was +the least natural, and perhaps the most dissolute; and I have always fancied +that the bloated artificial forms of the architecture partake of the social +disorganisation of the time. Who can respect a simpering ninny, grinning in a +Roman dress and a full-bottomed wig, who is made to pass off for a hero? or a +fat woman in a hoop, and of a most doubtful virtue, who leers at you as a +goddess? In the palaces which we saw, several Court allegories were +represented, which, atrocious as they were in point of art, might yet serve to +attract the regard of the moraliser. There were Faith, Hope, and Charity +restoring Don John to the arms of his happy Portugal: there were Virtue, +Valour, and Victory saluting Don Emanuel: Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic (for +what I know, or some mythologic nymphs) dancing before Don Miguel—the picture +is there still, at the Ajuda; and ah me! where is poor Mig? Well, it is these +State lies and ceremonies that we persist in going to see; whereas a man would +have a much better insight into Portuguese manners, by planting himself at a +corner, like yonder beggar, and watching the real transactions of the day. +</p> + +<p> +A drive to Belem is the regular route practised by the traveller who has to +make only a short stay, and accordingly a couple of carriages were provided for +our party, and we were driven through the long merry street of Belem, peopled +by endless strings of mules,—by thousands of gallegos, with water-barrels on +their shoulders, or lounging by the fountains to hire,—by the Lisbon and Belem +omnibuses, with four mules, jingling along at a good pace; and it seemed to me +to present a far more lively and cheerful, though not so regular, an appearance +as the stately quarters of the city we had left behind us. The little shops +were at full work— the men brown, well-dressed, manly, and handsome: so much +cannot, I am sorry to say, be said for the ladies, of whom, with every anxiety +to do so, our party could not perceive a single good- looking specimen all day. +The noble blue Tagus accompanies you all along these three miles of busy +pleasant street, whereof the chief charm, as I thought, was its look of genuine +business—that appearance of comfort which the cleverest Court-architect never +knows how to give. +</p> + +<p> +The carriages (the canvas one with four seats and the chaise in which I drove) +were brought suddenly up to a gate with the Royal arms over it; and here we +were introduced to as queer an exhibition as the eye has often looked on. This +was the state-carriage house, where there is a museum of huge old tumble-down +gilded coaches of the last century, lying here, mouldy and dark, in a sort of +limbo. The gold has vanished from the great lumbering old wheels and panels; +the velvets are wofully tarnished. When one thinks of the patches and powder +that have simpered out of those plate-glass windows—the mitred bishops, the +big-wigged marshals, the shovel- hatted abbes which they have borne in their +time—the human mind becomes affected in no ordinary degree. Some human minds +heave a sigh for the glories of bygone days; while others, considering rather +the lies and humbug, the vice and servility, which went framed and glazed and +enshrined, creaking along in those old Juggernaut cars, with fools worshipping +under the wheels, console themselves for the decay of institutions that may +have been splendid and costly, but were ponderous, clumsy, slow, and unfit for +daily wear. The guardian of these defunct old carriages tells some prodigious +fibs concerning them: he pointed out one carriage that was six hundred years +old in his calendar; but any connoisseur in bric-a-brac can see it was built at +Paris in the Regent Orleans’ time. +</p> + +<p> +Hence it is but a step to an institution in full life and vigour,— a noble +orphan-school for one thousand boys and girls, founded by Don Pedro, who gave +up to its use the superb convent of Belem, with its splendid cloisters, vast +airy dormitories, and magnificent church. Some Oxford gentlemen would have wept +to see the desecrated edifice,—to think that the shaven polls and white gowns +were banished from it to give place to a thousand children, who have not even +the clergy to instruct them. “Every lad here may choose his trade,” our little +informant said, who addressed us in better French than any of our party spoke, +whose manners were perfectly gentlemanlike and respectful, and whose clothes, +though of a common cotton stuff, were cut and worn with a military neatness and +precision. All the children whom we remarked were dressed with similar +neatness, and it was a pleasure to go through their various rooms for study, +where some were busy at mathematics, some at drawing, some attending a lecture +on tailoring, while others were sitting at the feet of a professor of the +science of shoemaking. All the garments of the establishment were made by the +pupils; even the deaf and dumb were drawing and reading, and the blind were, +for the most part, set to perform on musical instruments, and got up a concert +for the visitors. It was then we wished ourselves of the numbers of the deaf +and dumb, for the poor fellows made noises so horrible, that even as blind +beggars they could hardly get a livelihood in the musical way. +</p> + +<p> +Hence we were driven to the huge palace of Necessidades, which is but a wing of +a building that no King of Portugal ought ever to be rich enough to complete, +and which, if perfect, might outvie the Tower of Babel. The mines of Brazil +must have been productive of gold and silver indeed when the founder imagined +this enormous edifice. From the elevation on which it stands it commands the +noblest views,—the city is spread before it, with its many churches and towers, +and for many miles you see the magnificent Tagus, rolling by banks crowned with +trees and towers. But to arrive at this enormous building you have to climb a +steep suburb of wretched huts, many of them with dismal gardens of dry cracked +earth, where a few reedy sprouts of Indian corn seemed to be the chief +cultivation, and which were guarded by huge plants of spiky aloes, on which the +rags of the proprietors of the huts were sunning themselves. The terrace before +the palace was similarly encroached upon by these wretched habitations. A few +millions judiciously expended might make of this arid hill one of the most +magnificent gardens in the world; and the palace seems to me to excel for +situation any Royal edifice I have ever seen. But the huts of these swarming +poor have crawled up close to its gates,— the superb walls of hewn stone stop +all of a sudden with a lath- and-plaster hitch; and capitals, and hewn stones +for columns, still lying about on the deserted terrace, may lie there for ages +to come, probably, and never take their places by the side of their brethren in +yonder tall bankrupt galleries. The air of this pure sky has little effect upon +the edifices,—the edges of the stone look as sharp as if the builders had just +left their work; and close to the grand entrance stands an outbuilding, part of +which may have been burnt fifty years ago, but is in such cheerful preservation +that you might fancy the fire had occurred yesterday. It must have been an +awful sight from this hill to have looked at the city spread before it, and +seen it reeling and swaying in the time of the earthquake. I thought it looked +so hot and shaky, that one might fancy a return of the fit. In several places +still remain gaps and chasms, and ruins lie here and there as they cracked and +fell. +</p> + +<p> +Although the palace has not attained anything like its full growth, yet what +exists is quite big enough for the monarch of such a little country; and +Versailles or Windsor has not apartments more nobly proportioned. The Queen +resides in the Ajuda, a building of much less pretensions, of which the yellow +walls and beautiful gardens are seen between Belem and the city. The +Necessidades are only used for grand galas, receptions of ambassadors, and +ceremonies of state. In the throne-room is a huge throne, surmounted by an +enormous gilt crown, than which I have never seen anything larger in the finest +pantomime at Drury Lane; but the effect of this splendid piece is lessened by a +shabby old Brussels carpet, almost the only other article of furniture in the +apartment, and not quite large enough to cover its spacious floor. The looms of +Kidderminster have supplied the web which ornaments the “Ambassadors’ +Waiting-Room,” and the ceilings are painted with huge allegories in distemper, +which pretty well correspond with the other furniture. Of all the undignified +objects in the world, a palace out at elbows is surely the meanest. Such places +ought not to be seen in adversity,—splendour is their decency,—and when no +longer able to maintain it, they should sink to the level of their means, +calmly subside into manufactories, or go shabby in seclusion. +</p> + +<p> +There is a picture-gallery belonging to the palace that is quite of a piece +with the furniture, where are the mythological pieces relative to the kings +before alluded to, and where the English visitor will see some astonishing +pictures of the Duke of Wellington, done in a very characteristic style of +Portuguese art. There is also a chapel, which has been decorated with much care +and sumptuousness of ornament—the altar surmounted by a ghastly and horrible +carved figure in the taste of the time when faith was strengthened by the +shrieks of Jews on the rack, and enlivened by the roasting of heretics. Other +such frightful images may be seen in the churches of the city; those which we +saw were still rich, tawdry, and splendid to outward show, although the French, +as usual, had robbed their shrines of their gold and silver, and the statues of +their jewels and crowns. But brass and tinsel look to the visitor full as well +at a little distance,—as doubtless Soult and Junot thought, when they despoiled +these places of worship, like French philosophers as they were. +</p> + +<p> +A friend, with a classical turn of mind, was bent upon seeing the aqueduct, +whither we went on a dismal excursion of three hours, in the worst carriages, +over the most diabolical clattering roads, up and down dreary parched hills, on +which grew a few grey olive-trees and many aloes. When we arrived, the gate +leading to the aqueduct was closed, and we were entertained with a legend of +some respectable character who had made a good livelihood there for some time +past lately, having a private key to this very aqueduct, and lying in wait +there for unwary travellers like ourselves, whom he pitched down the arches +into the ravines below, and there robbed them at leisure. So that all we saw +was the door and the tall arches of the aqueduct, and by the time we returned +to town it was time to go on board the ship again. If the inn at which we had +sojourned was not of the best quality, the bill, at least, would have done +honour to the first establishment in London. We all left the house of +entertainment joyfully, glad to get out of the sun- burnt city and go HOME. +Yonder in the steamer was home, with its black funnel and gilt portraiture of +“Lady Mary Wood” at the bows; and every soul on board felt glad to return to +the friendly little vessel. But the authorities of Lisbon, however, are very +suspicious of the departing stranger, and we were made to lie an hour in the +river before the Sanita boat, where a passport is necessary to be procured +before the traveller can quit the country. Boat after boat laden with priests +and peasantry, with handsome red-sashed gallegos clad in brown, and +ill-favoured women, came and got their permits, and were off, as we lay bumping +up against the old hull of the Sanita boat; but the officers seemed to take a +delight in keeping us there bumping, looked at us quite calmly over the ship’s +sides, and smoked their cigars without the least attention to the prayers which +we shrieked out for release. +</p> + +<p> +If we were glad to get away from Lisbon, we were quite as sorry to be obliged +to quit Cadiz, which we reached the next night, and where we were allowed a +couple of hours’ leave to land and look about. It seemed as handsome within as +it is stately without; the long narrow streets of an admirable cleanliness, +many of the tall houses of rich and noble decorations, and all looking as if +the city were in full prosperity. I have seen no more cheerful and animated +sight than the long street leading from the quay where we were landed, and the +market blazing in sunshine, piled with fruit, fish, and poultry, under +many-coloured awnings; the tall white houses with their balconies and galleries +shining round about, and the sky above so blue that the best cobalt in all the +paint-box looks muddy and dim in comparison to it. There were pictures for a +year in that market-place—from the copper-coloured old hags and beggars who +roared to you for the love of Heaven to give money, to the swaggering dandies +of the market, with red sashes and tight clothes, looking on superbly, with a +hand on the hip and a cigar in the mouth. These must be the chief critics at +the great bull-fight house yonder by the Alameda, with its scanty trees, and +cool breezes facing the water. Nor are there any corks to the bulls’ horns +here, as at Lisbon. A small old English guide who seized upon me the moment my +foot was on shore, had a store of agreeable legends regarding the bulls, men, +and horses that had been killed with unbounded profusion in the late +entertainments which have taken place. +</p> + +<p> +It was so early an hour in the morning that the shops were scarcely opened as +yet; the churches, however, stood open for the faithful, and we met scores of +women tripping towards them with pretty feet, and smart black mantillas, from +which looked out fine dark eyes and handsome pale faces, very different from +the coarse brown countenances we had seen at Lisbon. A very handsome modern +cathedral, built by the present bishop at his own charges, was the finest of +the public edifices we saw; it was not, however, nearly so much frequented as +another little church, crowded with altars and fantastic ornaments, and lights +and gilding, where we were told to look behind a huge iron grille, and beheld a +bevy of black nuns kneeling. Most of the good ladies in the front ranks stopped +their devotions, and looked at the strangers with as much curiosity as we +directed at them through the gloomy bars of their chapel. The men’s convents +are closed; that which contains the famous Murillos has been turned into an +academy of the fine arts; but the English guide did not think the pictures were +of sufficient interest to detain strangers, and so hurried us back to the +shore, and grumbled at only getting three shillings at parting for his trouble +and his information. And so our residence in Andalusia began and ended before +breakfast, and we went on board and steamed for Gibraltar, looking, as we +passed, at Joinville’s black squadron, and the white houses of St. Mary’s +across the bay, with the hills of Medina Sidonia and Granada lying purple +beyond them. There’s something even in those names which is pleasant to write +down; to have passed only two hours in Cadiz is something—to have seen real +donnas with comb and mantle—real caballeros with cloak and cigar—real Spanish +barbers lathering out of brass basins—and to have heard guitars under the +balconies: there was one that an old beggar was jangling in the market, whilst +a huge leering fellow in bushy whiskers and a faded velvet dress came singing +and jumping after our party,—not singing to a guitar, it is true, but imitating +one capitally with his voice, and cracking his fingers by way of castanets, and +performing a dance such as Figaro or Lablache might envy. How clear that +fellow’s voice thrums on the ear even now; and how bright and pleasant remains +the recollection of the fine city and the blue sea, and the Spanish flags +floating on the boats that danced over it, and Joinville’s band beginning to +play stirring marches as we puffed out of the bay. +</p> + +<p> +The next stage was Gibraltar, where we were to change horses. Before sunset we +skirted along the dark savage mountains of the African coast, and came to the +Rock just before gun-fire. It is the very image of an enormous lion, crouched +between the Atlantic and the Mediterranean, and set there to guard the passage +for its British mistress. The next British lion is Malta, four days further on +in the Midland Sea, and ready to spring upon Egypt or pounce upon Syria, or +roar so as to be heard at Marseilles in case of need. +</p> + +<p> +To the eyes of the civilian the first-named of these famous fortifications is +by far the most imposing. The Rock looks so tremendous, that to ascend it, even +without the compliment of shells or shot, seems a dreadful task—what would it +be when all those mysterious lines of batteries were vomiting fire and +brimstone; when all those dark guns that you see poking their grim heads out of +every imaginable cleft and zigzag should salute you with shot, both hot and +cold; and when, after tugging up the hideous perpendicular place, you were to +find regiments of British grenadiers ready to plunge bayonets into your poor +panting stomach, and let out artificially the little breath left there? It is a +marvel to think that soldiers will mount such places for a shilling—ensigns for +five and ninepence—a day: a cabman would ask double the money to go half way! +One meekly reflects upon the above strange truths, leaning over the ship’s +side, and looking up the huge mountain, from the tower nestled at the foot of +it to the thin flagstaff at the summit, up to which have been piled the most +ingenious edifices for murder Christian science ever adopted. My hobby-horse is +a quiet beast, suited for Park riding, or a gentle trot to Putney and back to a +snug stable, and plenty of feeds of corn:- it can’t abide climbing hills, and +is not at all used to gunpowder. Some men’s animals are so spirited that the +very appearance of a stone-wall sets them jumping at it: regular chargers of +hobbies, which snort and say “Ha, ha!” at the mere notion of a battle. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0003"></a> +CHAPTER III<br/> +THE “LADY MARY WOOD”</h2> + +<p> +Our week’s voyage is now drawing to a close. We have just been to look at Cape +Trafalgar, shining white over the finest blue sea. (We, who were looking at +Trafalgar Square only the other day!) The sight of that cape must have +disgusted Joinville and his fleet of steamers, as they passed yesterday into +Cadiz bay, and to-morrow will give them a sight of St. Vincent. +</p> + +<p> +One of their steam-vessels has been lost off the coast of Africa; they were +obliged to burn her, lest the Moors should take possession of her. She was a +virgin vessel, just out of Brest. Poor innocent! to die in the very first month +of her union with the noble whiskered god of war! +</p> + +<p> +We Britons on board the English boat received the news of the “Groenenland’s” +abrupt demise with grins of satisfaction. It was a sort of national compliment, +and cause of agreeable congratulation. “The lubbers!” we said; “the clumsy +humbugs! there’s none but Britons to rule the waves!” and we gave ourselves +piratical airs, and went down presently and were sick in our little buggy +berths. It was pleasant, certainly, to laugh at Joinville’s admiral’s flag +floating at his foremast, in yonder black ship, with its two thundering great +guns at the bows and stern, its busy crew swarming on the deck, and a crowd of +obsequious shore-boats bustling round the vessel—and to sneer at the Mogador +warrior, and vow that we English, had we been inclined to do the business, +would have performed it a great deal better. +</p> + +<p> +Now yesterday at Lisbon we saw H.M.S. “Caledonia.” THIS, on the contrary, +inspired us with feelings of respect and awful pleasure. There she lay—the huge +sea-castle—bearing the unconquerable flag of our country. She had but to open +her jaws, as it were, and she might bring a second earthquake on the +city—batter it into kingdom-come—with the Ajuda palace and the Necessidades, +the churches, and the lean, dry, empty streets, and Don John, tremendous on +horseback, in the midst of Black Horse Square. Wherever we looked we could see +that enormous “Caledonia,” with her flashing three lines of guns. We looked at +the little boats which ever and anon came out of this monster, with humble +wonder. There was the lieutenant who boarded us at midnight before we dropped +anchor in the river: ten white-jacketed men pulling as one, swept along with +the barge, gig, boat, curricle, or coach-and-six, with which he came up to us. +We examined him—his red whiskers—his collars turned down—his duck trousers, his +bullion epaulets—with awe. With the same reverential feeling we examined the +seamen—the young gentleman in the bows of the boat—the handsome young officers +of marines we met sauntering in the town next day—the Scotch surgeon who +boarded us as we weighed anchor—every man, down to the broken-nosed mariner who +was drunk in a wine-house, and had “Caledonia” written on his hat. Whereas at +the Frenchmen we looked with undisguised contempt. We were ready to burst with +laughter as we passed the Prince’s vessel—there was a little French boy in a +French boat alongside cleaning it, and twirling about a little French mop—we +thought it the most comical, contemptible French boy, mop, boat, steamer, +prince—Psha! it is of this wretched vapouring stuff that false patriotism is +made. I write this as a sort of homily à propos of the day, and Cape Trafalgar, +off which we lie. What business have I to strut the deck, and clap my wings, +and cry “Cock-a-doodle-doo” over it? Some compatriots are at that work even +now. +</p> + +<p> +We have lost one by one all our jovial company. There were the five Oporto +wine-merchants—all hearty English gentlemen—gone to their wine-butts, and their +red-legged partridges, and their duels at Oporto. It appears that these gallant +Britons fight every morning among themselves, and give the benighted people +among whom they live an opportunity to admire the spirit national. There is the +brave honest major, with his wooden leg—the kindest and simplest of Irishmen: +he has embraced his children, and reviewed his little invalid garrison of +fifteen men, in the fort which he commands at Belem, by this time, and, I have +no doubt, played to every soul of them the twelve tunes of his musical-box. It +was pleasant to see him with that musical-box—how pleased he wound it up after +dinner—how happily he listened to the little clinking tunes as they galloped, +ding-dong, after each other! A man who carries a musical-box is always a +good-natured man. +</p> + +<p> +Then there was his Grace, or his Grandeur, the Archbishop of Beyrouth (in the +parts of the infidels), His Holiness’s Nuncio to the Court of Her Most Faithful +Majesty, and who mingled among us like any simple mortal,—except that he had an +extra smiling courtesy, which simple mortals do not always possess; and when +you passed him as such, and puffed your cigar in his face, took off his hat +with a grin of such prodigious rapture, as to lead you to suppose that the most +delicious privilege of his whole life was that permission to look at the tip of +your nose or of your cigar. With this most reverend prelate was his Grace’s +brother and chaplain—a very greasy and good-natured ecclesiastic, who, from his +physiognomy, I would have imagined to be a dignitary of the Israelitish rather +than the Romish Church—as profuse in smiling courtesy as his Lordship of +Beyrouth. These two had a meek little secretary between them, and a tall French +cook and valet, who, at meal times, might be seen busy about the cabin where +their reverences lay. They were on their backs for the greater part of the +voyage; their yellow countenances were not only unshaven, but, to judge from +appearances, unwashed. They ate in private; and it was only of evenings, as the +sun was setting over the western wave, and, comforted by the dinner, the +cabin-passengers assembled on the quarter-deck, that we saw the dark faces of +the reverend gentlemen among us for a while. They sank darkly into their berths +when the steward’s bell tolled for tea. +</p> + +<p> +At Lisbon, where we came to anchor at midnight, a special boat came off, +whereof the crew exhibited every token of reverence for the ambassador of the +ambassador of Heaven, and carried him off from our company. This abrupt +departure in the darkness disappointed some of us, who had promised ourselves +the pleasure of seeing his Grandeur depart in state in the morning, shaved, +clean, and in full pontificals, the tripping little secretary swinging an +incense-pot before him, and the greasy chaplain bearing his crosier. +</p> + +<p> +Next day we had another bishop, who occupied the very same berth his Grace of +Beyrouth had quitted—was sick in the very same way— so much so that this cabin +of the “Lady Mary Wood” is to be christened “the bishop’s berth” henceforth; +and a handsome mitre is to be painted on the basin. +</p> + +<p> +Bishop No. 2 was a very stout, soft, kind-looking old gentleman, in a square +cap, with a handsome tassel of green and gold round his portly breast and back. +He was dressed in black robes and tight purple stockings: and we carried him +from Lisbon to the little flat coast of Faro, of which the meek old gentleman +was the chief pastor. +</p> + +<p> +We had not been half-an-hour from our anchorage in the Tagus, when his Lordship +dived down into the episcopal berth. All that night there was a good smart +breeze; it blew fresh all the next day, as we went jumping over the blue bright +sea; and there was no sign of his Lordship the bishop until we were opposite +the purple hills of Algarve, which lay some ten miles distant,—a yellow sunny +shore stretching flat before them, whose long sandy flats and villages we could +see with our telescope from the steamer. +</p> + +<p> +Presently a little vessel, with a huge shining lateen sail, and bearing the +blue and white Portuguese flag, was seen playing a sort of leap-frog on the +jolly waves, jumping over them, and ducking down as merry as could be. This +little boat came towards the steamer as quick as ever she could jump; and +Captain Cooper roaring out, “Stop her!” to “Lady Mary Wood,” her Ladyship’s +paddles suddenly ceased twirling, and news was carried to the good bishop that +his boat was almost alongside, and that his hour was come. +</p> + +<p> +It was rather an affecting sight to see the poor old fat gentleman, looking +wistfully over the water as the boat now came up, and her eight seamen, with +great noise, energy, and gesticulation laid her by the steamer. The steamer +steps were let down; his Lordship’s servant, in blue and yellow livery (like +the Edinburgh Review), cast over the episcopal luggage into the boat, along +with his own bundle and the jack-boots with which he rides postilion on one of +the bishop’s fat mules at Faro. The blue and yellow domestic went down the +steps into the boat. Then came the bishop’s turn; but he couldn’t do it for a +long while. He went from one passenger to another, sadly shaking them by the +hand, often taking leave and seeming loth to depart, until Captain Cooper, in a +stern but respectful tone, touched him on the shoulder, and said, I know not +with what correctness, being ignorant of the Spanish language, “Senor ’Bispo! +Senor ’Bispo!” on which summons the poor old man, looking ruefully round him +once more, put his square cap under his arm, tucked up his long black +petticoats, so as to show his purple stockings and jolly fat calves, and went +trembling down the steps towards the boat. The good old man! I wish I had had a +shake of that trembling podgy hand somehow before he went upon his sea +martyrdom. I felt a love for that soft-hearted old Christian. Ah! let us hope +his governante tucked him comfortably in bed when he got to Faro that night, +and made him a warm gruel and put his feet in warm water. The men clung around +him, and almost kissed him as they popped him into the boat, but he did not +heed their caresses. Away went the boat scudding madly before the wind. Bang! +another lateen-sailed boat in the distance fired a gun in his honour; but the +wind was blowing away from the shore, and who knows when that meek bishop got +home to his gruel? +</p> + +<p> +I think these were the notables of our party. I will not mention the laughing +ogling lady of Cadiz, whose manners, I very much regret to say, were a great +deal too lively for my sense of propriety; nor those fair sufferers, her +companions, who lay on the deck with sickly, smiling female resignation: nor +the heroic children, who no sooner ate biscuit than they were ill, and no +sooner were ill than they began eating biscuit again: but just allude to one +other martyr, the kind lieutenant in charge of the mails, and who bore his +cross with what I can’t but think a very touching and noble resignation. +</p> + +<p> +There’s a certain sort of man whose doom in the world is disappointment,—who +excels in it,—and whose luckless triumphs in his meek career of life, I have +often thought, must be regarded by the kind eyes above with as much favour as +the splendid successes and achievements of coarser and more prosperous men. As +I sat with the lieutenant upon deck, his telescope laid over his lean legs, and +he looking at the sunset with a pleased, withered old face, he gave me a little +account of his history. I take it he is in nowise disinclined to talk about it, +simple as it is: he has been seven- and-thirty years in the navy, being +somewhat more mature in the service than Lieutenant Peel, Rear-Admiral Prince +de Joinville, and other commanders who need not be mentioned. He is a very +well- educated man, and reads prodigiously,—travels, histories, lives of +eminent worthies and heroes, in his simple way. He is not in the least angry at +his want of luck in the profession. “Were I a boy to-morrow,” he said, “I would +begin it again; and when I see my schoolfellows, and how they have got on in +life, if some are better off than I am, I find many are worse, and have no call +to be discontented.” So he carries Her Majesty’s mails meekly through this +world, waits upon port-admirals and captains in his old glazed hat, and is as +proud of the pennon at the bow of his little boat, as if it were flying from +the mainmast of a thundering man-of-war. He gets two hundred a year for his +services, and has an old mother and a sister living in England somewhere, who I +will wager (though he never, I swear, said a word about it) have a good portion +of this princely income. +</p> + +<p> +Is it breaking a confidence to tell Lieutenant Bundy’s history? Let the motive +excuse the deed. It is a good, kind, wholesome, and noble character. Why should +we keep all our admiration for those who win in this world, as we do, +sycophants as we are? When we write a novel, our great stupid imaginations can +go no further than to marry the hero to a fortune at the end, and to find out +that he is a lord by right. O blundering lickspittle morality! And yet I would +like to fancy some happy retributive Utopia in the peaceful cloud-land, where +my friend the meek lieutenant should find the yards of his ship manned as he +went on board, all the guns firing an enormous salute (only without the least +noise or vile smell of powder), and he be saluted on the deck as Admiral Sir +James, or Sir Joseph—ay, or Lord Viscount Bundy, knight of all the orders above +the sun. +</p> + +<p> +I think this is a sufficient, if not a complete catalogue of the worthies on +board the “Lady Mary Wood.” In the week we were on board—it seemed a year, by +the way—we came to regard the ship quite as a home. We felt for the captain—the +most good-humoured, active, careful, ready of captains—a filial, a fraternal +regard; for the providor, who provided for us with admirable comfort and +generosity, a genial gratitude; and for the brisk steward’s lads— brisk in +serving the banquet, sympathising in handing the basin— every possible +sentiment of regard and good-will. What winds blew, and how many knots we ran, +are all noted down, no doubt, in the ship’s log: and as for what ships we +saw—every one of them with their gunnage, tonnage, their nation, their +direction whither they were bound—were not these all noted down with surprising +ingenuity and precision by the lieutenant, at a family desk at which he sat +every night, before a great paper elegantly and mysteriously ruled off with his +large ruler? I have a regard for every man on board that ship, from the captain +down to the crew—down even to the cook, with tattooed arms, sweating among the +saucepans in the galley, who used (with a touching affection) to send us locks +of his hair in the soup. And so, while our feelings and recollections are warm, +let us shake hands with this knot of good fellows, comfortably floating about +in their little box of wood and iron, across Channel, Biscay Bay, and the +Atlantic, from Southampton Water to Gibraltar Straits. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0004"></a> +CHAPTER IV<br/> +GIBRALTAR</h2> + +<p> +Suppose all the nations of the earth to send fitting ambassadors to represent +them at Wapping or Portsmouth Point, with each, under its own national +signboard and language, its appropriate house of call, and your imagination may +figure the Main Street of Gibraltar: almost the only part of the town, I +believe, which boasts of the name of street at all, the remaining houserows +being modestly called lanes, such as Bomb Lane, Battery Lane, Fusee Lane, and +so on. In Main Street the Jews predominate, the Moors abound; and from the +“Jolly Sailor,” or the brave “Horse Marine,” where the people of our nation are +drinking British beer and gin, you hear choruses of “Garryowen” or “The Lass I +left behind me;” while through the flaring lattices of the Spanish ventas come +the clatter of castanets and the jingle and moan of Spanish guitars and +ditties. It is a curious sight at evening this thronged street, with the +people, in a hundred different costumes, bustling to and fro under the coarse +flare of the lamps; swarthy Moors, in white or crimson robes; dark Spanish +smugglers in tufted hats, with gay silk handkerchiefs round their heads; +fuddled seamen from men-of-war, or merchantmen; porters, Galician or Genoese; +and at every few minutes’ interval, little squads of soldiers tramping to +relieve guard at some one of the innumerable posts in the town. +</p> + +<p> +Some of our party went to a Spanish venta, as a more convenient or romantic +place of residence than an English house; others made choice of the club-house +in Commercial Square, of which I formed an agreeable picture in my imagination; +rather, perhaps, resembling the Junior United Service Club in Charles Street, +by which every Londoner has passed ere this with respectful pleasure, catching +glimpses of magnificent blazing candelabras, under which sit neat half-pay +officers, drinking half-pints of port. The club-house of Gibraltar is not, +however, of the Charles Street sort: it may have been cheerful once, and there +are yet relics of splendour about it. When officers wore pigtails, and in the +time of Governor O’Hara, it may have been a handsome place; but it is mouldy +and decrepit now; and though his Excellency, Mr. Bulwer, was living there, and +made no complaints that I heard of, other less distinguished persons thought +they had reason to grumble. Indeed, what is travelling made of? At least half +its pleasures and incidents come out of inns; and of them the tourist can speak +with much more truth and vivacity than of historical recollections compiled out +of histories, or filched out of handbooks. But to speak of the best inn in a +place needs no apology: that, at least, is useful information. As every person +intending to visit Gibraltar cannot have seen the flea-bitten countenances of +our companions, who fled from their Spanish venta to take refuge at the club +the morning after our arrival, they may surely be thankful for being directed +to the best house of accommodation in one of the most unromantic, +uncomfortable, and prosaic of towns. +</p> + +<p> +If one had a right to break the sacred confidence of the mahogany, I could +entertain you with many queer stories of Gibraltar life, gathered from the lips +of the gentlemen who enjoyed themselves round the dingy tablecloth of the +club-house coffee-room, richly decorated with cold gravy and spilt beer. I +heard there the very names of the gentlemen who wrote the famous letters from +the “Warspite” regarding the French proceedings at Mogador; and met several +refugee Jews from that place, who said that they were much more afraid of the +Kabyles without the city than of the guns of the French squadron, of which they +seemed to make rather light. I heard the last odds on the ensuing match between +Captain Smith’s b. g. Bolter, and Captain Brown’s ch. c. Roarer: how the +gun-room of Her Majesty’s ship “Purgatory” had “cobbed” a tradesman of the +town, and of the row in consequence. I heard capital stories of the way in +which Wilkins had escaped the guard, and Thompson had been locked up among the +mosquitoes for being out after ten without the lantern. I heard how the +governor was an old -, but to say what, would be breaking a confidence: only +this may be divulged, that the epithet was exceedingly complimentary to Sir +Robert Wilson. All the while these conversations were going on, a strange scene +of noise and bustle was passing in the market-place, in front of the window, +where Moors, Jews, Spaniards, soldiers were thronging in the sun; and a ragged +fat fellow, mounted on a tobacco-barrel, with his hat cocked on his ear, was +holding an auction, and roaring with an energy and impudence that would have +done credit to Covent Garden. +</p> + +<p> +The Moorish castle is the only building about the Rock which has an air at all +picturesque or romantic; there is a plain Roman Catholic cathedral, a hideous +new Protestant church of the cigar-divan architecture, and a Court-house with a +portico which is said to be an imitation of the Parthenon: the ancient +religions houses of the Spanish town are gone, or turned into military +residences, and masked so that you would never know their former pious +destination. You walk through narrow whitewashed lanes, bearing such martial +names as are before mentioned, and by-streets with barracks on either side: +small Newgate-like looking buildings, at the doors of which you may see the +sergeants’ ladies conversing; or at the open windows of the officers’ quarters, +Ensign Fipps lying on his sofa and smoking his cigar, or Lieutenant Simson +practising the flute to while away the weary hours of garrison dulness. I was +surprised not to find more persons in the garrison library, where is a +magnificent reading-room, and an admirable collection of books. +</p> + +<p> +In spite of the scanty herbage and the dust on the trees, the Alameda is a +beautiful walk; of which the vegetation has been as laboriously cared for as +the tremendous fortifications which flank it on either side. The vast Rock +rises on one side with its interminable works of defence, and Gibraltar Bay is +shining on the other, out on which from the terraces immense cannon are +perpetually looking, surrounded by plantations of cannon-balls and beds of +bomb-shells, sufficient, one would think, to blow away the whole peninsula. The +horticultural and military mixture is indeed very queer: here and there +temples, rustic summer-seats, &c. have been erected in the garden, but you +are sure to see a great squat mortar look up from among the flower-pots: and +amidst the aloes and geraniums sprouts the green petticoat and scarlet coat of +a Highlander. Fatigue-parties are seen winding up the hill, and busy about the +endless cannon-ball plantations; awkward squads are drilling in the open +spaces: sentries marching everywhere, and (this is a caution to artists) I am +told have orders to run any man through who is discovered making a sketch of +the place. It is always beautiful, especially at evening, when the people are +sauntering along the walks, and the moon is shining on the waters of the bay +and the hills and twinkling white houses of the opposite shore. Then the place +becomes quite romantic: it is too dark to see the dust on the dried leaves; the +cannon-balls do not intrude too much, but have subsided into the shade; the +awkward squads are in bed; even the loungers are gone, the fan-flirting Spanish +ladies, the sallow black-eyed children, and the trim white-jacketed dandies. A +fife is heard from some craft at roost on the quiet waters somewhere; or a +faint cheer from yonder black steamer at the Mole, which is about to set out on +some night expedition. You forget that the town is at all like Wapping, and +deliver yourself up entirely to romance; the sentries look noble pacing there, +silent in the moonlight, and Sandy’s voice is quite musical as he challenges +with a “Who goes there?” +</p> + +<p> +“All’s Well” is very pleasant when sung decently in tune, and inspires noble +and poetic ideas of duty, courage, and danger: but when you hear it shouted all +the night through, accompanied by a clapping of muskets in a time of profound +peace, the sentinel’s cry becomes no more romantic to the hearer than it is to +the sandy Connaught-man or the bare-legged Highlander who delivers it. It is +best to read about wars comfortably in Harry Lorrequer or Scott’s novels, in +which knights shout their war-cries, and jovial Irish bayoneteers hurrah, +without depriving you of any blessed rest. Men of a different way of thinking, +however, can suit themselves perfectly at Gibraltar; where there is marching +and counter- marching, challenging and relieving guard all the night through. +And not here in Commercial Square alone, but all over the huge Rock in the +darkness—all through the mysterious zig-zags, and round the dark cannon-ball +pyramids, and along the vast rock-galleries, and up to the topmost flagstaff, +where the sentry can look out over two seas, poor fellows are marching and +clapping muskets, and crying “All’s Well,” dressed in cap and feather, in place +of honest nightcaps best befitting the decent hours of sleep. +</p> + +<p> +All these martial noises three of us heard to the utmost advantage, lying on +iron bedsteads at the time in a cracked old room on the ground-floor, the open +windows of which looked into the square. No spot could be more favourably +selected for watching the humours of a garrison town by night. About midnight, +the door hard by us was visited by a party of young officers, who having had +quite as much drink as was good for them, were naturally inclined for more; and +when we remonstrated through the windows, one of them in a young tipsy voice +asked after our mothers, and finally reeled away. How charming is the +conversation of high-spirited youth! I don’t know whether the guard got hold of +them: but certainly if a civilian had been hiccuping through the streets at +that hour, he would have been carried off to the guard-house, and left to the +mercy of the mosquitoes there, and had up before the Governor in the morning. +The young man in the coffee-room tells me he goes to sleep every night with the +keys of Gibraltar under his pillow. It is an awful image, and somehow completes +the notion of the slumbering fortress. Fancy Sir Robert Wilson, his nose just +visible over the sheets, his night-cap and the huge key (you see the very +identical one in Reynolds’s portrait of Lord Heathfield) peeping out from under +the bolster! +</p> + +<p> +If I entertain you with accounts of inns and nightcaps it is because I am more +familiar with these subjects than with history and fortifications: as far as I +can understand the former, Gibraltar is the great British depot for smuggling +goods into the Peninsula. You see vessels lying in the harbour, and are told in +so many words they are smugglers: all those smart Spaniards with cigar and +mantles are smugglers, and run tobaccos and cotton into Catalonia; all the +respected merchants of the place are smugglers. The other day a Spanish revenue +vessel was shot to death under the thundering great guns of the fort, for +neglecting to bring to, but it so happened that it was in chase of a smuggler: +in this little corner of her dominions Britain proclaims war to custom-houses, +and protection to free trade. Perhaps ere a very long day, England may be +acting that part towards the world, which Gibraltar performs towards Spain now; +and the last war in which we shall ever engage may be a custom-house war. For +once establish railroads and abolish preventive duties through Europe, and what +is there left to fight for? It will matter very little then under what flag +people live, and foreign ministers and ambassadors may enjoy a dignified +sinecure; the army will rise to the rank of peaceful constables, not having any +more use for their bayonets than those worthy people have for their weapons now +who accompany the law at assizes under the name of javelin-men. The apparatus +of bombs and eighty-four- pounders may disappear from the Alameda, and the +crops of cannon- balls which now grow there may give place to other plants more +pleasant to the eye; and the great key of Gibraltar may be left in the gate for +anybody to turn at will, and Sir Robert Wilson may sleep in quiet. +</p> + +<p> +I am afraid I thought it was rather a release, when, having made up our minds +to examine the Rock in detail and view the magnificent excavations and +galleries, the admiration of all military men, and the terror of any enemies +who may attack the fortress, we received orders to embark forthwith in the +“Tagus,” which was to early us to Malta and Constantinople. So we took leave of +this famous Rock— this great blunderbuss—which we seized out of the hands of +the natural owners a hundred and forty years ago, and which we have kept ever +since tremendously loaded and cleaned and ready for use. To seize and have it +is doubtless a gallant thing; it is like one of those tests of courage which +one reads of in the chivalrous romances, when, for instance, Sir Huon of +Bordeaux is called upon to prove his knighthood by going to Babylon and pulling +out the Sultan’s beard and front teeth in the midst of his Court there. But, +after all, justice must confess it was rather hard on the poor Sultan. If we +had the Spaniards established at Land’s End, with impregnable Spanish +fortifications on St. Michael’s Mount, we should perhaps come to the same +conclusion. Meanwhile let us hope, during this long period of deprivation, the +Sultan of Spain is reconciled to the loss of his front teeth and bristling +whiskers— let us even try to think that he is better without them. At all +events, right or wrong, whatever may be our title to the property, there is no +Englishman but must think with pride of the manner in which his countrymen have +kept it, and of the courage, endurance, and sense of duty with which stout old +Eliott and his companions resisted Crillon and the Spanish battering ships and +his fifty thousand men. There seems to be something more noble in the success +of a gallant resistance than of an attack, however brave. After failing in his +attack on the fort, the French General visited the English Commander who had +foiled him, and parted from him and his garrison in perfect politeness and +good-humour. The English troops, Drinkwater says, gave him thundering cheers as +he went away, and the French in return complimented us on our gallantry, and +lauded the humanity of our people. If we are to go on murdering each other in +the old-fashioned way, what a pity it is that our battles cannot end in the +old-fashioned way too! +</p> + +<p> +One of our fellow-travellers, who had written a book, and had suffered +considerably from sea-sickness during our passage along the coasts of France +and Spain, consoled us all by saying that the very minute we got into the +Mediterranean we might consider ourselves entirely free from illness; and, in +fact, that it was unheard of in the Inland Sea. Even in the Bay of Gibraltar +the water looked bluer than anything I have ever seen—except Miss Smith’s eyes. +I thought, somehow, the delicious faultless azure never could look angry—just +like the eyes before alluded to—and under this assurance we passed the Strait, +and began coasting the African shore calmly and without the least apprehension, +as if we were as much used to the tempest as Mr. T. P. Cooke. +</p> + +<p> +But when, in spite of the promise of the man who had written the book, we found +ourselves worse than in the worst part of the Bay of Biscay, or off the +storm-lashed rocks of Finisterre, we set down the author in question as a gross +impostor, and had a mind to quarrel with him for leading us into this cruel +error. The most provoking part of the matter, too, was, that the sky was +deliciously clear and cloudless, the air balmy, the sea so insultingly blue +that it seemed as if we had no right to be ill at all, and that the innumerable +little waves that frisked round about our keel were enjoying an anerithmon +gelasma (this is one of my four Greek quotations: depend on it I will manage to +introduce the other three before the tour is done)—seemed to be enjoying, I +say, the above-named Greek quotation at our expense. Here is the dismal log of +Wednesday, 4th of September: —“All attempts at dining very fruitless. Basins in +requisition. Wind hard ahead. Que diable allais-je faire dans cette galere? +Writing or thinking impossible: so read ‘Letters from the AEgean.’” These brief +words give, I think, a complete idea of wretchedness, despair, remorse, and +prostration of soul and body. Two days previously we passed the forts and moles +and yellow buildings of Algiers, rising very stately from the sea, and skirted +by gloomy purple lines of African shore, with fires smoking in the mountains, +and lonely settlements here and there. +</p> + +<p> +On the 5th, to the inexpressible joy of all, we reached Valetta, the entrance +to the harbour of which is one of the most stately and agreeable scenes ever +admired by sea-sick traveller. The small basin was busy with a hundred ships, +from the huge guard-ship, which lies there a city in itself;—merchantmen +loading and crews cheering, under all the flags of the world flaunting in the +sunshine; a half-score of busy black steamers perpetually coming and going, +coaling and painting, and puffing and hissing in and out of harbour; slim +men-of-war’s barges shooting to and fro, with long shining oars flashing like +wings over the water; hundreds of painted town-boats, with high heads and white +awnings,—down to the little tubs in which some naked, tawny young beggars came +paddling up to the steamer, entreating us to let them dive for halfpence. Round +this busy blue water rise rocks, blazing in sunshine, and covered with every +imaginable device of fortification; to the right, St. Elmo, with flag and +lighthouse; and opposite, the Military Hospital, looking like a palace; and all +round, the houses of the city, for its size the handsomest and most stately in +the world. +</p> + +<p> +Nor does it disappoint you on a closer inspection, as many a foreign town does. +The streets are thronged with a lively comfortable-looking population; the poor +seem to inhabit handsome stone palaces, with balconies and projecting windows +of heavy carved stone. The lights and shadows, the cries and stenches, the +fruit-shops and fish-stalls, the dresses and chatter of all nations; the +soldiers in scarlet, and women in black mantillas; the beggars, boat-men, +barrels of pickled herrings and macaroni; the shovel-hatted priests and bearded +capuchins; the tobacco, grapes, onions, and sunshine; the signboards, +bottled-porter stores, the statues of saints and little chapels which jostle +the stranger’s eyes as he goes up the famous stairs from the Water-gate, make a +scene of such pleasant confusion and liveliness as I have never witnessed +before. And the effect of the groups of multitudinous actors in this busy +cheerful drama is heightened, as it were, by the decorations of the stage. The +sky is delightfully brilliant; all the houses and ornaments are stately; castle +and palaces are rising all around; and the flag, towers, and walls of Fort St. +Elmo look as fresh and magnificent as if they had been erected only yesterday. +</p> + +<p> +The Strada Reale has a much more courtly appearance than that one described. +Here are palaces, churches, court-houses and libraries, the genteel London +shops, and the latest articles of perfumery. Gay young officers are strolling +about in shell-jackets much too small for them: midshipmen are clattering by on +hired horses; squads of priests, habited after the fashion of Don Basilio in +the opera, are demurely pacing to and fro; professional beggars run shrieking +after the stranger; and agents for horses, for inns, and for worse places +still, follow him and insinuate the excellence of their goods. The houses where +they are selling carpet-bags and pomatum were the palaces of the successors of +the goodliest company of gallant knights the world ever heard tell of. It seems +unromantic; but THESE were not the romantic Knights of St. John. The heroic +days of the Order ended as the last Turkish galley lifted anchor after the +memorable siege. The present stately houses were built in times of peace and +splendour and decay. I doubt whether the Auberge de Provence, where the “Union +Club” flourishes now, has ever seen anything more romantic than the pleasant +balls held in the great room there. +</p> + +<p> +The Church of St. John, not a handsome structure without, is magnificent +within: a noble hall covered with a rich embroidery of gilded carving, the +chapels of the different nations on either side, but not interfering with the +main structure, of which the whole is simple, and the details only splendid; it +seemed to me a fitting place for this wealthy body of aristocratic soldiers, +who made their devotions as it were on parade, and, though on their knees, +never forgot their epaulets or their quarters of nobility. This mixture of +religion and worldly pride seems incongruous at first; but have we not at +church at home similar relics of feudal ceremony?—the verger with the silver +mace who precedes the vicar to the desk; the two chaplains of my Lord +Archbishop, who bow over his Grace as he enters the communion-table gate; even +poor John, who follows my Lady with a coroneted prayer-book, and makes his +conge as he hands it into the pew. What a chivalrous absurdity is the banner of +some high and mighty prince, hanging over his stall in Windsor Chapel, when you +think of the purpose for which men are supposed to assemble there! The Church +of the Knights of St. John is paved over with sprawling heraldic devices of the +dead gentlemen of the dead Order; as if, in the next world, they expected to +take rank in conformity with their pedigrees, and would be marshalled into +heaven according to the orders of precedence. Cumbrous handsome paintings adorn +the walls and chapels, decorated with pompous monuments of Grand Masters. +Beneath is a crypt, where more of these honourable and reverend warriors lie, +in a state that a Simpson would admire. In the altar are said to lie three of +the most gallant relics in the world: the keys of Acre, Rhodes, and Jerusalem. +What blood was shed in defending these emblems! What faith, endurance, genius, +and generosity; what pride, hatred, ambition, and savage lust of blood were +roused together for their guardianship! +</p> + +<p> +In the lofty halls and corridors of the Governor’s house, some portraits of the +late Grand Masters still remain: a very fine one, by Caravaggio, of a knight in +gilt armour, hangs in the dining- room, near a full-length of poor Louis XVI., +in Royal robes, the very picture of uneasy impotency. But the portrait of De +Vignacourt is the only one which has a respectable air; the other chiefs of the +famous Society are pompous old gentlemen in black, with huge periwigs, and +crowns round their hats, and a couple of melancholy pages in yellow and red. +But pages and wigs and Grand Masters have almost faded out of the canvas, and +are vanishing into Hades with a most melancholy indistinctness. The names of +most of these gentlemen, however, live as yet in the forts of the place, which +all seem to have been eager to build and christen: so that it seems as if, in +the Malta mythology, they had been turned into freestone. +</p> + +<p> +In the armoury is the very suit painted by Caravaggio, by the side of the +armour of the noble old La Valette, whose heroism saved his island from the +efforts of Mustapha and Dragut, and an army quite as fierce and numerous as +that which was baffled before Gibraltar, by similar courage and resolution. The +sword of the last-named famous corsair (a most truculent little scimitar), +thousands of pikes and halberts, little old cannons and wall-pieces, helmets +and cuirasses, which the knights or their people wore, are trimly arranged +against the wall, and, instead of spiking Turks or arming warriors, now serve +to point morals and adorn tales. And here likewise are kept many thousand +muskets, swords, and boarding-pikes for daily use, and a couple of ragged old +standards of one of the English regiments, who pursued and conquered in Egypt +the remains of the haughty and famous French republican army, at whose +appearance the last knights of Malta flung open the gates of all their +fortresses, and consented to be extinguished without so much as a remonstrance, +or a kick, or a struggle. +</p> + +<p> +We took a drive into what may be called the country; where the fields are +rocks, and the hedges are stones—passing by the stone gardens of the Florian, +and wondering at the number and handsomeness of the stone villages and churches +rising everywhere among the stony hills. Handsome villas were passed +everywhere, and we drove for a long distance along the sides of an aqueduct, +quite a Royal work of the Caravaggio in gold armour, the Grand Master De +Vignacourt. A most agreeable contrast to the arid rocks of the general scenery +was the garden at the Governor’s country-house; with the orange-trees and +water, its beautiful golden grapes, luxuriant flowers, and thick cool +shrubberies. The eye longs for this sort of refreshment, after being seared +with the hot glare of the general country; and St. Antonio was as pleasant +after Malta as Malta was after the sea. +</p> + +<p> +We paid the island a subsequent visit in November, passing seventeen days at an +establishment called Fort Manuel there, and by punsters the Manuel des +Voyageurs; where Government accommodates you with quarters; where the +authorities are so attentive as to scent your letters with aromatic vinegar +before you receive them, and so careful of your health as to lock you up in +your room every night lest you should walk in your sleep, and so over the +battlements into the sea—if you escaped drowning in the sea, the sentries on +the opposite shore would fire at you, hence the nature of the precaution. To +drop, however, this satirical strain: those who know what quarantine is, may +fancy that the place somehow becomes unbearable in which it has been endured. +And though the November climate of Malta is like the most delicious May in +England, and though there is every gaiety and amusement in the town, a +comfortable little opera, a good old library filled full of good old books +(none of your works of modern science, travel, and history, but good old +USELESS books of the last two centuries), and nobody to trouble you in reading +them, and though the society of Valetta is most hospitable, varied, and +agreeable, yet somehow one did not feel SAFE in the island, with perpetual +glimpses of Fort Manuel from the opposite shore; and, lest the quarantine +authorities should have a fancy to fetch one back again, on a pretext of +posthumous plague, we made our way to Naples by the very first +opportunity—those who remained, that is, of the little Eastern Expedition. They +were not all there. The Giver of life and death had removed two of our company: +one was left behind to die in Egypt, with a mother to bewail his loss, another +we buried in the dismal lazaretto cemetery. +</p> + +<p> +* * * +</p> + +<p> +One is bound to look at this, too, as a part of our journey. Disease and death +are knocking perhaps at your next cabin door. Your kind and cheery companion +has ridden his last ride and emptied his last glass beside you. And while fond +hearts are yearning for him far away, and his own mind, if conscious, is +turning eagerly towards the spot of the world whither affection or interest +calls it—the Great Father summons the anxious spirit from earth to himself, and +ordains that the nearest and dearest shall meet here no more. +</p> + +<p> +Such an occurrence as a death in a lazaretto, mere selfishness renders +striking. We were walking with him but two days ago on deck. One has a sketch +of him, another his card, with the address written yesterday, and given with an +invitation to come and see him at home in the country, where his children are +looking for him. He is dead in a day, and buried in the walls of the prison. A +doctor felt his pulse by deputy—a clergyman comes from the town to read the +last service over him—and the friends, who attend his funeral, are marshalled +by lazaretto-guardians, so as not to touch each other. Every man goes back to +his room and applies the lesson to himself. One would not so depart without +seeing again the dear dear faces. We reckon up those we love: they are but very +few, but I think one loves them better than ever now. Should it be your turn +next?—and why not? Is it pity or comfort to think of that affection which +watches and survives you? +</p> + +<p> +The Maker has linked together the whole race of man with this chain of love. I +like to think that there is no man but has had kindly feelings for some other, +and he for his neighbour, until we bind together the whole family of Adam. Nor +does it end here. It joins heaven and earth together. For my friend or my child +of past days is still my friend or my child to me here, or in the home prepared +for us by the Father of all. If identity survives the grave, as our faith tells +us, is it not a consolation to think that there may be one or two souls among +the purified and just, whose affection watches us invisible, and follows the +poor sinner on earth? +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0005"></a> +CHAPTER V<br/> +ATHENS</h2> + +<p> +Not feeling any enthusiasm myself about Athens, my bounden duty of course is +clear, to sneer and laugh heartily at all who have. In fact, what business has +a lawyer, who was in Pump Court this day three weeks, and whose common reading +is law reports or the newspaper, to pretend to fall in love for the long +vacation with mere poetry, of which I swear a great deal is very doubtful, and +to get up an enthusiasm quite foreign to his nature and usual calling in life? +What call have ladies to consider Greece “romantic,” they who get their notions +of mythology from the well-known pages of “Tooke’s Pantheon”? What is the +reason that blundering Yorkshire squires, young dandies from Corfu regiments, +jolly sailors from ships in the harbour, and yellow old Indians returning from +Bundelcund, should think proper to be enthusiastic about a country of which +they know nothing; the mere physical beauty of which they cannot, for the most +part, comprehend; and because certain characters lived in it two thousand four +hundred years ago? What have these people in common with Pericles, what have +these ladies in common with Aspasia (O fie)? Of the race of Englishmen who come +wandering about the tomb of Socrates, do you think the majority would not have +voted to hemlock him? Yes: for the very same superstition which leads men by +the nose now, drove them onward in the days when the lowly husband of Xantippe +died for daring to think simply and to speak the truth. I know of no quality +more magnificent in fools than their faith: that perfect consciousness they +have, that they are doing virtuous and meritorious actions, when they are +performing acts of folly, murdering Socrates, or pelting Aristides with holy +oyster-shells—all for Virtue’s sake; and a “History of Dulness in all Ages of +the World,” is a book which a philosopher would surely be hanged, but as +certainly blessed, for writing. +</p> + +<p> +If papa and mamma (honour be to them!) had not followed the faith of their +fathers, and thought proper to send away their only beloved son (afterwards to +be celebrated under the name of Titmarsh) into ten years’ banishment of +infernal misery, tyranny, annoyance; to give over the fresh feelings of the +heart of the little Michael Angelo to the discipline of vulgar bullies, who, in +order to lead tender young children to the Temple of Learning (as they do in +the spelling-books), drive them on with clenched fists and low abuse; if they +fainted, revive them with a thump, or assailed them with a curse; if they were +miserable, consoled them with a brutal jeer—if, I say, my dear parents, instead +of giving me the inestimable benefit of a ten years’ classical education, had +kept me at home with my dear thirteen sisters, it is probable I should have +liked this country of Attica, in sight of the blue shores of which the present +pathetic letter is written; but I was made so miserable in youth by a classical +education, that all connected with it is disagreeable in my eyes; and I have +the same recollection of Greek in youth that I have of castor-oil. +</p> + +<p> +So in coming in sight of the promontory of Sunium, where the Greek Muse, in an +awful vision, came to me, and said in a patronising way, “Why, my dear” (she +always, the old spinster, adopts this high and mighty tone)—“Why, my dear, are +you not charmed to be in this famous neighbourhood, in this land of poets and +heroes, of whose history your classical education ought to have made you a +master? if it did not, you have wofully neglected your opportunities, and your +dear parents have wasted their money in sending you to school.” I replied, +“Madam, your company in youth was made so laboriously disagreeable to me, that +I can’t at present reconcile myself to you in age. I read your poets, but it +was in fear and trembling; and a cold sweat is but an ill accompaniment to +poetry. I blundered through your histories; but history is so dull (saving your +presence) of herself, that when the brutal dulness of a schoolmaster is +superadded to her own slow conversation, the union becomes intolerable: hence I +have not the slightest pleasure in renewing my acquaintance with a lady who has +been the source of so much bodily and mental discomfort to me.” To make a long +story short, I am anxious to apologise for a want of enthusiasm in the +classical line, and to excuse an ignorance which is of the most undeniable +sort. +</p> + +<p> +This is an improper frame of mind for a person visiting the land of AEschylus +and Euripides; add to which, we have been abominably overcharged at the inn: +and what are the blue hills of Attica, the silver calm basin of Piraeus, the +heathery heights of Pentelicus, and yonder rocks crowned by the Doric columns +of the Parthenon, and the thin Ionic shafts of the Erechtheum, to a man who has +had little rest, and is bitten all over by bugs? Was Alcibiades bitten by bugs, +I wonder; and did the brutes crawl over him as he lay in the rosy arms of +Phryne? I wished all night for Socrates’s hammock or basket, as it is described +in the “Clouds;” in which resting- place, no doubt, the abominable animals kept +perforce clear of him. +</p> + +<p> +A French man-of-war, lying in the silvery little harbour, sternly eyeing out of +its stern portholes a saucy little English corvette beside, began playing +sounding marches as a crowd of boats came paddling up to the steamer’s side to +convey us travellers to shore. There were Russian schooners and Greek brigs +lying in this little bay; dumpy little windmills whirling round on the sunburnt +heights round about it; an improvised town of quays and marine taverns has +sprung up on the shore; a host of jingling barouches, more miserable than any +to be seen even in Germany, were collected at the landing-place; and the Greek +drivers (how queer they looked in skull-caps, shabby jackets with profuse +embroidery of worsted, and endless petticoats of dirty calico!) began, in a +generous ardour for securing passengers, to abuse each other’s horses and +carriages in the regular London fashion. Satire could certainly hardly +caricature the vehicle in which we were made to journey to Athens; and it was +only by thinking that, bad as they were, these coaches were much more +comfortable contrivances than any Alcibiades or Cimon ever had, that we +consoled ourselves along the road. It was flat for six miles along the plain to +the city: and you see for the greater part of the way the purple mount on which +the Acropolis rises, and the gleaming houses of the town spread beneath. Round +this wide, yellow, barren plain,—a stunted district of olive-trees is almost +the only vegetation visible—there rises, as it were, a sort of chorus of the +most beautiful mountains; the most elegant, gracious, and noble the eye ever +looked on. These hills did not appear at all lofty or terrible, but superbly +rich and aristocratic. The clouds were dancing round about them; you could see +their rosy purple shadows sweeping round the clear serene summits of the hill. +To call a hill aristocratic seems affected or absurd; but the difference +between these hills and the others, is the difference between Newgate Prison +and the Travellers’ Club, for instance: both are buildings; but the one stern, +dark, and coarse; the other rich, elegant, and festive. At least, so I thought. +With such a stately palace as munificent Nature had built for these people, +what could they be themselves but lordly, beautiful, brilliant, brave, and +wise? We saw four Greeks on donkeys on the road (which is a dust-whirlwind +where it is not a puddle); and other four were playing with a dirty pack of +cards, at a barrack that English poets have christened the “Half-way House.” +Does external nature and beauty influence the soul to good? You go about +Warwickshire, and fancy that from merely being born and wandering in those +sweet sunny plains and fresh woodlands Shakspeare must have drunk in a portion +of that frank artless sense of beauty which lies about his works like a bloom +or dew; but a Coventry ribbon-maker, or a slang Leamington squire, are looking +on those very same landscapes too, and what do they profit? You theorise about +the influence which the climate and appearance of Attica must have had in +ennobling those who were born there: yonder dirty, swindling, ragged +blackguards, lolling over greasy cards three hours before noon, quarrelling and +shrieking, armed to the teeth and afraid to fight, are bred out of the same +land which begot the philosophers and heroes. But the “Half-way House” is +passed by this time, and behold! we are in the capital of King Otho. +</p> + +<p> +I swear solemnly that I would rather have two hundred a year in Fleet Street, +than be King of the Greeks, with Basileus written before my name round their +beggarly coin; with the bother of perpetual revolutions in my huge +plaster-of-Paris palace, with no amusement but a drive in the afternoon over a +wretched arid country, where roads are not made, with ambassadors (the deuce +knows why, for what good can the English, or the French, or the Russian party +get out of such a bankrupt alliance as this?) perpetually pulling and tugging +at me, away from honest Germany, where there is beer and aesthetic +conversation, and operas at a small cost. The shabbiness of this place actually +beats Ireland, and that is a strong word. The palace of the Basileus is an +enormous edifice of plaster, in a square containing six houses, three donkeys, +no roads, no fountains (except in the picture of the inn); backwards it seems +to look straight to the mountain—on one side is a beggarly garden—the King goes +out to drive (revolutions permitting) at five—some four-and-twenty blackguards +saunter up to the huge sandhill of a terrace, as His Majesty passes by in a +gilt barouche and an absurd fancy dress; the gilt barouche goes plunging down +the sandhills; the two dozen soldiers, who have been presenting arms, slouch +off to their quarters; the vast barrack of a palace remains entirely white, +ghastly, and lonely; and, save the braying of a donkey now and then (which +long-eared minstrels are more active and sonorous in Athens than in any place I +know), all is entirely silent round Basileus’s palace. How could people who +knew Leopold fancy he would be so “jolly green” as to take such a berth? It was +only a gobemouche of a Bavarian that could ever have been induced to accept it. +</p> + +<p> +I beseech you to believe that it was not the bill and the bugs at the inn which +induced the writer hereof to speak so slightingly of the residence of Basileus. +These evils are now cured and forgotten. This is written off the leaden flats +and mounds which they call the Troad. It is stern justice alone which +pronounces this excruciating sentence. It was a farce to make this place into a +kingly capital; and I make no manner of doubt that King Otho, the very day he +can get away unperceived, and get together the passage- money, will be off for +dear old Deutschland, Fatherland, Beerland! +</p> + +<p> +I have never seen a town in England which may be compared to this; for though +Herne Bay is a ruin now, money was once spent upon it and houses built; here, +beyond a few score of mansions comfortably laid out, the town is little better +than a rickety agglomeration of larger and smaller huts, tricked out here and +there with the most absurd cracked ornaments and cheap attempts at elegance. +But neatness is the elegance of poverty, and these people despise such a homely +ornament. I have got a map with squares, fountains, theatres, public gardens, +and Places d’Othon marked out; but they only exist in the paper capital—the +wretched tumble-down wooden one boasts of none. +</p> + +<p> +One is obliged to come back to the old disagreeable comparison of Ireland. +Athens may be about as wealthy a place as Carlow or Killarney—the streets swarm +with idle crowds, the innumerable little lanes flow over with dirty little +children, they are playing and puddling about in the dirt everywhere, with +great big eyes, yellow faces, and the queerest little gowns and skull-caps. But +in the outer man, the Greek has far the advantage of the Irishman: most of them +are well and decently dressed (if five-and-twenty yards of petticoat may not be +called decent, what may?), they swagger to and fro with huge knives in their +girdles. Almost all the men are handsome, but live hard, it is said, in order +to decorate their backs with those fine clothes of theirs. I have seen but two +or three handsome women, and these had the great drawback which is common to +the race—I mean, a sallow, greasy, coarse complexion, at which it was not +advisable to look too closely. +</p> + +<p> +And on this score I think we English may pride ourselves on possessing an +advantage (by WE, I mean the lovely ladies to whom this is addressed with the +most respectful compliments) over the most classical country in the world. I +don’t care for beauty which will only bear to be looked at from a distance, +like a scene in a theatre. What is the most beautiful nose in the world, if it +be covered with a skin of the texture and colour of coarse whitey- brown paper; +and if Nature has made it as slippery and shining as though it had been +anointed with pomatum? They may talk about beauty, but would you wear a flower +that had been dipped in a grease-pot? No; give me a fresh, dewy, healthy rose +out of Somersetshire; not one of those superb, tawdry, unwholesome exotics, +which are only good to make poems about. Lord Byron wrote more cant of this +sort than any poet I know of. Think of “the peasant girls with dark blue eyes” +of the Rhine—the brown-faced, flat-nosed, thick-lipped, dirty wenches! Think of +“filling high a cup of Samian wine;” small beer is nectar compared to it, and +Byron himself always drank gin. That man never wrote from his heart. He got up +rapture and enthusiasm with an eye to the public; but this is dangerous ground, +even more dangerous than to look Athens full in the face, and say that your +eyes are not dazzled by its beauty. The Great Public admires Greece and Byron: +the public knows best. Murray’s “Guide-book” calls the latter “our native +bard.” Our native bard! Mon Dieu! HE Shakspeare’s, Milton’s, Keats’s, Scott’s +native bard! Well, woe be to the man who denies the public gods! +</p> + +<p> +The truth is, then, that Athens is a disappointment; and I am angry that it +should be so. To a skilled antiquarian, or an enthusiastic Greek scholar, the +feelings created by a sight of the place of course will be different; but you +who would be inspired by it must undergo a long preparation of reading, and +possess, too, a particular feeling; both of which, I suspect, are uncommon in +our busy commercial newspaper-reading country. Men only say they are +enthusiastic about the Greek and Roman authors and history, because it is +considered proper and respectable. And we know how gentlemen in Baker Street +have editions of the classics handsomely bound in the library, and how they use +them. Of course they don’t retire to read the newspaper; it is to look over a +favourite ode of Pindar, or to discuss an obscure passage in Athenaeus! Of +course country magistrates and Members of Parliament are always studying +Demosthenes and Cicero; we know it from their continual habit of quoting the +Latin grammar in Parliament. But it is agreed that the classics are +respectable; therefore we are to be enthusiastic about them. Also let us admit +that Byron is to be held up as “our native bard.” +</p> + +<p> +I am not so entire a heathen as to be insensible to the beauty of those relics +of Greek art, of which men much more learned and enthusiastic have written such +piles of descriptions. I thought I could recognise the towering beauty of the +prodigious columns of the Temple of Jupiter; and admire the astonishing grace, +severity, elegance, completeness of the Parthenon. The little Temple of +Victory, with its fluted Corinthian shafts, blazed under the sun almost as +fresh as it must have appeared to the eyes of its founders; I saw nothing more +charming and brilliant, more graceful, festive, and aristocratic than this +sumptuous little building. The Roman remains which lie in the town below look +like the works of barbarians beside these perfect structures. They jar +strangely on the eye, after it has been accustoming itself to perfect harmony +and proportions. If, as the schoolmaster tells us, the Greek writing is as +complete as the Greek art; if an ode of Pindar is as glittering and pure as the +Temple of Victory; or a discourse of Plato as polished and calm as yonder +mystical portico of the Erechtheum: what treasures of the senses and delights +of the imagination have those lost to whom the Greek books are as good as +sealed! +</p> + +<p> +And yet one meets with very dull first-class men. Genius won’t transplant from +one brain to another, or is ruined in the carriage, like fine Burgundy. Sir +Robert Peel and Sir John Hobhouse are both good scholars; but their poetry in +Parliament does not strike one as fine. Muzzle, the schoolmaster, who is +bullying poor trembling little boys, was a fine scholar when he was a sizar, +and a ruffian then and ever since. Where is the great poet, since the days of +Milton, who has improved the natural offshoots of his brain by grafting it from +the Athenian tree? +</p> + +<p> +I had a volume of Tennyson in my pocket, which somehow settled that question, +and ended the querulous dispute between me and Conscience, under the shape of +the neglected and irritated Greek muse, which had been going on ever since I +had commenced my walk about Athens. The old spinster saw me wince at the idea +of the author of Dora and Ulysses, and tried to follow up her advantage by +farther hints of time lost, and precious opportunities thrown away. “You might +have written poems like them,” said she; “or, no, not like them perhaps, but +you might have done a neat prize poem, and pleased your papa and mamma. You +might have translated Jack and Jill into Greek iambics, and been a credit to +your college.” I turned testily away from her. “Madam,” says I, “because an +eagle houses on a mountain, or soars to the sun, don’t you be angry with a +sparrow that perches on a garret window, or twitters on a twig. Leave me to +myself: look, my beak is not aquiline by any means.” +</p> + +<p> +And so, my dear friend, you who have been reading this last page in wonder, and +who, instead of a description of Athens, have been accommodated with a lament +on the part of the writer, that he was idle at school, and does not know Greek, +excuse this momentary outbreak of egotistic despondency. To say truth, dear +Jones, when one walks among the nests of the eagles, and sees the prodigious +eggs they laid, a certain feeling of discomfiture must come over us smaller +birds. You and I could not invent—it even stretches our minds painfully to try +and comprehend part of the beauty of the Parthenon—ever so little of it,—the +beauty of a single column,—a fragment of a broken shaft lying under the +astonishing blue sky there, in the midst of that unrivalled landscape. There +may be grander aspects of nature, but none more deliciously beautiful. The +hills rise in perfect harmony, and fall in the most exquisite cadences—the sea +seems brighter, the islands more purple, the clouds more light and rosy than +elsewhere. As you look up through the open roof, you are almost oppressed by +the serene depth of the blue overhead. Look even at the fragments of the +marble, how soft and pure it is, glittering and white like fresh snow! “I was +all beautiful,” it seems to say: “even the hidden parts of me were spotless, +precious, and fair”—and so, musing over this wonderful scene, perhaps I get +some feeble glimpse or idea of that ancient Greek spirit which peopled it with +sublime races of heroes and gods; {1} and which I never could get out of a +Greek book,—no, not though Muzzle flung it at my head. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0006"></a> +CHAPTER VI<br/> +SMYRNA—FIRST GLIMPSES OF THE EAST</h2> + +<p> +I am glad that the Turkish part of Athens was extinct, so that I should not be +baulked of the pleasure of entering an Eastern town by an introduction to any +garbled or incomplete specimen of one. Smyrna seems to me the most Eastern of +all I have seen; as Calais will probably remain to the Englishman the most +French town in the world. The jack-boots of the postilions don’t seem so huge +elsewhere, or the tight stockings of the maid-servants so Gallic. The churches +and the ramparts, and the little soldiers on them, remain for ever impressed +upon your memory; from which larger temples and buildings, and whole armies +have subsequently disappeared: and the first words of actual French heard +spoken, and the first dinner at “Quillacq’s,” remain after twenty years as +clear as on the first day. Dear Jones, can’t you remember the exact smack of +the white hermitage, and the toothless old fellow singing “Largo al factotum”? +</p> + +<p> +The first day in the East is like that. After that there is nothing. The wonder +is gone, and the thrill of that delightful shock, which so seldom touches the +nerves of plain men of the world, though they seek for it everywhere. One such +looked out at Smyrna from our steamer, and yawned without the least excitement, +and did not betray the slightest emotion, as boats with real Turks on board +came up to the ship. There lay the town with minarets and cypresses, domes and +castles; great guns were firing off, and the blood-red flag of the Sultan +flaring over the fort ever since sunrise; woods and mountains came down to the +gulf’s edge, and as you looked at them with the telescope, there peeped out of +the general mass a score of pleasant episodes of Eastern life—there were +cottages with quaint roofs; silent cool kiosks, where the chief of the eunuchs +brings down the ladies of the harem. I saw Hassan, the fisherman, getting his +nets; and Ali Baba going off with his donkey to the great forest for wood. +Smith looked at these wonders quite unmoved; and I was surprised at his apathy; +but he had been at Smyrna before. A man only sees the miracle once; though you +yearn over it ever so, it won’t come again. I saw nothing of Ali Baba and +Hassan the next time we came to Smyrna, and had some doubts (recollecting the +badness of the inn) about landing at all. A person who wishes to understand +France or the East should come in a yacht to Calais or Smyrna, land for two +hours, and never afterwards go back again. +</p> + +<p> +But those two hours are beyond measure delightful. Some of us were querulous up +to that time, and doubted of the wisdom of making the voyage. Lisbon, we owned, +was a failure; Athens a dead failure; Malta very well, but not worth the +trouble and sea-sickness: in fact, Baden-Baden or Devonshire would be a better +move than this; when Smyrna came, and rebuked all mutinous Cockneys into +silence. Some men may read this who are in want of a sensation. If they love +the odd and picturesque, if they loved the “Arabian Nights” in their youth, let +them book themselves on board one of the Peninsular and Oriental vessels, and +try one DIP into Constantinople or Smyrna. Walk into the bazaar, and the East +is unveiled to you: how often and often have you tried to fancy this, lying out +on a summer holiday at school! It is wonderful, too, how LIKE it is: you may +imagine that you have been in the place before, you seem to know it so well! +</p> + +<p> +The beauty of that poetry is, to me, that it was never too handsome; there is +no fatigue of sublimity about it. Shacabac and the little Barber play as great +a part in it as the heroes; there are no uncomfortable sensations of terror; +you may be familiar with the great Afreet, who was going to execute the +travellers for killing his son with a date-stone. Morgiana, when she kills the +forty robbers with boiling oil, does not seem to hurt them in the least; and +though King Schahriar makes a practice of cutting off his wives’ heads, yet you +fancy they have got them on again in some of the back rooms of the palace, +where they are dancing and playing on dulcimers. How fresh, easy, good-natured, +is all this! How delightful is that notion of the pleasant Eastern people about +knowledge, where the height of science is made to consist in the answering of +riddles! and all the mathematicians and magicians bring their great beards to +bear on a conundrum! +</p> + +<p> +When I got into the bazaar among this race, somehow I felt as if they were all +friends. There sat the merchants in their little shops, quiet and solemn, but +with friendly looks. There was no smoking, it was the Ramazan; no eating, the +fish and meat fizzing in the enormous pots of the cook-shops are only for the +Christians. The children abounded; the law is not so stringent upon them, and +many wandering merchants were there selling figs (in the name of the Prophet, +doubtless) for their benefit, and elbowing onwards with baskets of grapes and +cucumbers. Countrymen passed bristling over with arms, each with a huge +bellyful of pistols and daggers in his girdle; fierce, but not the least +dangerous. Wild swarthy Arabs, who had come in with the caravans, walked +solemnly about, very different in look and demeanour from the sleek inhabitants +of the town. Greeks and Jews squatted and smoked, their shops tended by +sallow-faced boys, with large eyes, who smiled and welcomed you in; negroes +bustled about in gaudy colours; and women, with black nose-bags and shuffling +yellow slippers, chattered and bargained at the doors of the little shops. +There was the rope quarter and the sweetmeat quarter, and the pipe bazaar and +the arm bazaar, and the little turned-up shoe quarter, and the shops where +ready-made jackets and pelisses were swinging, and the region where, under the +ragged awning, regiments of tailors were at work. The sun peeps through these +awnings of mat or canvas, which are hung over the narrow lanes of the bazaar, +and ornaments them with a thousand freaks of light and shadow. Cogia Hassan +Alhabbal’s shop is in a blaze of light; while his neighbour, the barber and +coffee-house keeper, has his premises, his low seats and narghiles, his queer +pots and basins, in the shade. The cobblers are always good- natured; there was +one who, I am sure, has been revealed to me in my dreams, in a dirty old green +turban, with a pleasant wrinkled face like an apple, twinkling his little grey +eyes as he held them up to talk to the gossips, and smiling under a delightful +old grey beard, which did the heart good to see. You divine the conversation +between him and the cucumber-man, as the Sultan used to understand the language +of birds. Are any of those cucumbers stuffed with pearls, and is that Armenian +with the black square turban Haroun Alraschid in disguise, standing yonder by +the fountain where the children are drinking—the gleaming marble fountain, +chequered all over with light and shadow, and engraved with delicate arabesques +and sentences from the Koran? +</p> + +<p> +But the greatest sensation of all is when the camels come. Whole strings of +real camels, better even than in the procession of Blue Beard, with soft +rolling eyes and bended necks, swaying from one side of the bazaar to the other +to and fro, and treading gingerly with their great feet. O you fairy dreams of +boyhood! O you sweet meditations of half-holidays, here you are realised for +half-an- hour! The genius which presides over youth led us to do a good action +that day. There was a man sitting in an open room, ornamented with fine +long-tailed sentences of the Koran: some in red, some in blue; some written +diagonally over the paper; some so shaped as to represent ships, dragons, or +mysterious animals. The man squatted on a carpet in the middle of this room, +with folded arms, waggling his head to and fro, swaying about, and singing +through his nose choice phrases from the sacred work. But from the room above +came a clear noise of many little shouting voices, much more musical than that +of Naso in the matted parlour, and the guide told us it was a school, so we +went upstairs to look. +</p> + +<p> +I declare, on my conscience, the master was in the act of bastinadoing a little +mulatto boy; his feet were in a bar, and the brute was laying on with a cane; +so we witnessed the howling of the poor boy, and the confusion of the brute who +was administering the correction. The other children were made to shout, I +believe, to drown the noise of their little comrade’s howling; but the +punishment was instantly discontinued as our hats came up over the stair-trap, +and the boy cast loose, and the bamboo huddled into a corner, and the +schoolmaster stood before us abashed. All the small scholars in red caps, and +the little girls in gaudy handkerchiefs, turned their big wondering dark eyes +towards us; and the caning was over for THAT time, let us trust. I don’t envy +some schoolmasters in a future state. I pity that poor little blubbering +Mahometan: he will never be able to relish the “Arabian Nights” in the +original, all his life long. +</p> + +<p> +From this scene we rushed off somewhat discomposed to make a breakfast off red +mullets and grapes, melons, pomegranates, and Smyrna wine, at a dirty little +comfortable inn, to which we were recommended: and from the windows of which we +had a fine cheerful view of the gulf and its busy craft, and the loungers and +merchants along the shore. There were camels unloading at one wharf, and piles +of melons much bigger than the Gibraltar cannon-balls at another. It was the +fig-season, and we passed through several alleys encumbered with long rows of +fig-dressers, children and women for the most part, who were packing the fruit +diligently into drums, dipping them in salt-water first, and spreading them +neatly over with leaves; while the figs and leaves are drying, large white +worms crawl out of them, and swarm over the decks of the ships which carry them +to Europe and to England, where small children eat them with pleasure—I mean +the figs, not the worms—and where they are still served at wine-parties at the +Universities. When fresh they are not better than elsewhere; but the melons are +of admirable flavour, and so large, that Cinderella might almost be +accommodated with a coach made of a big one, without any very great distension +of its original proportions. +</p> + +<p> +Our guide, an accomplished swindler, demanded two dollars as the fee for +entering the mosque, which others of our party subsequently saw for sixpence, +so we did not care to examine that place of worship. But there were other +cheaper sights, which were to the full as picturesque, for which there was no +call to pay money, or, indeed, for a day, scarcely to move at all. I doubt +whether a man who would smoke his pipe on a bazaar counter all day, and let the +city flow by him, would not be almost as well employed as the most active +curiosity-hunter. +</p> + +<p> +To be sure he would not see the women. Those in the bazaar were shabby people +for the most part, whose black masks nobody would feel a curiosity to remove. +You could see no more of their figures than if they had been stuffed in +bolsters; and even their feet were brought to a general splay uniformity by the +double yellow slippers which the wives of true believers wear. But it is in the +Greek and Armenian quarters, and among those poor Christians who were pulling +figs, that you see the beauties; and a man of a generous disposition may lose +his heart half-a-dozen times a day in Smyrna. There was the pretty maid at work +at a tambour-frame in an open porch, with an old duenna spinning by her side, +and a goat tied up to the railings of the little court-garden; there was the +nymph who came down the stair with the pitcher on her head, and gazed with +great calm eyes, as large and stately as Juno’s; there was the gentle mother, +bending over a queer cradle, in which lay a small crying bundle of infancy. All +these three charmers were seen in a single street in the Armenian quarter, +where the house-doors are all open, and the women of the families sit under the +arches in the court. There was the fig-girl, beautiful beyond all others, with +an immense coil of deep black hair twisted round a head of which Raphael was +worthy to draw the outline and Titian to paint the colour. I wonder the Sultan +has not swept her off, or that the Persian merchants, who come with silks and +sweetmeats, have not kidnapped her for the Shah of Tehran. +</p> + +<p> +We went to see the Persian merchants at their khan, and purchased some silks +there from a swarthy black-bearded man, with a conical cap of lambswool. Is it +not hard to think that silks bought of a man in a lambswool cap, in a +caravanserai, brought hither on the backs of camels, should have been +manufactured after all at Lyons? Others of our party bought carpets, for which +the town is famous; and there was one who absolutely laid in a stock of real +Smyrna figs; and purchased three or four real Smyrna sponges for his carriage; +so strong was his passion for the genuine article. +</p> + +<p> +I wonder that no painter has given us familiar views of the East: not +processions, grand sultans, or magnificent landscapes; but faithful transcripts +of everyday Oriental life, such as each street will supply to him. The camels +afford endless motives, couched in the market-places, lying by thousands in the +camel-square, snorting and bubbling after their manner, the sun blazing down on +their backs, their slaves and keepers lying behind them in the shade: and the +Caravan Bridge, above all, would afford a painter subjects for a dozen of +pictures. Over this Roman arch, which crosses the Meles river, all the caravans +pass on their entrance to the town. On one side, as we sat and looked at it, +was a great row of plane- trees; on the opposite bank, a deep wood of tall +cypresses—in the midst of which rose up innumerable grey tombs, surmounted with +the turbans of the defunct believers. Beside the stream, the view was less +gloomy. There was under the plane-trees a little coffee- house, shaded by a +trellis-work, covered over with a vine, and ornamented with many rows of +shining pots and water-pipes, for which there was no use at noon-day now, in +the time of Ramazan. Hard by the coffee-house was a garden and a bubbling +marble fountain, and over the stream was a broken summer-house, to which +amateurs may ascend for the purpose of examining the river; and all round the +plane-trees plenty of stools for those who were inclined to sit and drink sweet +thick coffee, or cool lemonade made of fresh green citrons. The master of the +house, dressed in a white turban and light blue pelisse, lolled under the +coffee-house awning; the slave in white with a crimson striped jacket, his face +as black as ebony, brought us pipes and lemonade again, and returned to his +station at the coffee-house, where he curled his black legs together, and began +singing out of his flat nose to the thrumming of a long guitar with wire +strings. The instrument was not bigger than a soup-ladle, with a long straight +handle, but its music pleased the performer; for his eyes rolled shining about, +and his head wagged, and he grinned with an innocent intensity of enjoyment +that did one good to look at. And there was a friend to share his pleasure: a +Turk dressed in scarlet, and covered all over with daggers and pistols, sat +leaning forward on his little stool, rocking about, and grinning quite as +eagerly as the black minstrel. As he sang and we listened, figures of women +bearing pitchers went passing over the Roman bridge, which we saw between the +large trunks of the planes; or grey forms of camels were seen stalking across +it, the string preceded by the little donkey, who is always here their +long-eared conductor. +</p> + +<p> +These are very humble incidents of travel. Wherever the steamboat touches the +shore adventure retreats into the interior, and what is called romance +vanishes. It won’t bear the vulgar gaze; or rather the light of common day puts +it out, and it is only in the dark that it shines at all. There is no cursing +and insulting of Giaours now. If a Cockney looks or behaves in a particularly +ridiculous way, the little Turks come out and laugh at him. A Londoner is no +longer a spittoon for true believers: and now that dark Hassan sits in his +divan and drinks champagne, and Selim has a French watch, and Zuleika perhaps +takes Morison’s pills, Byronism becomes absurd instead of sublime, and is only +a foolish expression of Cockney wonder. They still occasionally beat a man for +going into a mosque, but this is almost the only sign of ferocious vitality +left in the Turk of the Mediterranean coast, and strangers may enter scores of +mosques without molestation. The paddle-wheel is the great conqueror. Wherever +the captain cries “Stop her!” Civilisation stops, and lands in the ship’s boat, +and makes a permanent acquaintance with the savages on shore. Whole hosts of +crusaders have passed and died, and butchered here in vain. But to manufacture +European iron into pikes and helmets was a waste of metal: in the shape of +piston-rods and furnace-pokers it is irresistible; and I think an allegory +might be made showing how much stronger commerce is than chivalry, and +finishing with a grand image of Mahomet’s crescent being extinguished in +Fulton’s boiler. +</p> + +<p> +This I thought was the moral of the day’s sights and adventures. We pulled off +to the steamer in the afternoon—the Inbat blowing fresh, and setting all the +craft in the gulf dancing over its blue waters. We were presently under way +again, the captain ordering his engines to work only at half power, so that a +French steamer which was quitting Smyrna at the same time might come up with +us, and fancy she could beat their irresistible, “Tagus.” Vain hope! Just as +the Frenchman neared us, the “Tagus” shot out like an arrow, and the +discomfited Frenchman went behind. Though we all relished the joke exceedingly, +there was a French gentleman on board who did not seem to be by any means +tickled with it; but he had received papers at Smyrna, containing news of +Marshal Bugeaud’s victory at Isly, and had this land victory to set against our +harmless little triumph at sea. +</p> + +<p> +That night we rounded the island of Mitylene: and the next day the coast of +Troy was in sight, and the tomb of Achilles—a dismal- looking mound that rises +in a low dreary barren shore—less lively and not more picturesque than the +Scheldt or the mouth of the Thames. Then we passed Tenedos and the forts and +town at the mouth of the Dardanelles. The weather was not too hot, the water as +smooth as at Putney, and everybody happy and excited at the thought of seeing +Constantinople to-morrow. We had music on board all the way from Smyrna. A +German commis-voyageur, with a guitar, who had passed unnoticed until that +time, produced his instrument about mid-day, and began to whistle waltzes. He +whistled so divinely that the ladies left their cabins, and men laid down their +books. He whistled a polka so bewitchingly that two young Oxford men began +whirling round the deck, and performed that popular dance with much agility +until they sank down tired. He still continued an unabated whistling, and as +nobody would dance, pulled off his coat, produced a pair of castanets, and +whistling a mazurka, performed it with tremendous agility. His whistling made +everybody gay and happy— made those acquainted who had not spoken before, and +inspired such a feeling of hilarity in the ship, that that night, as we floated +over the Sea of Marmora, a general vote was expressed for broiled bones and a +regular supper-party. Punch was brewed, and speeches were made, and, after a +lapse of fifteen years, I heard the “Old English Gentleman” and “Bright +Chanticleer Proclaims the Morn,” sung in such style that you would almost fancy +the proctors must hear, and send us all home. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0007"></a> +CHAPTER VII<br/> +CONSTANTINOPLE</h2> + +<p> +When we arose at sunrise to see the famous entry to Constantinople, we found, +in the place of the city and the sun, a bright white fog, which hid both from +sight, and which only disappeared as the vessel advanced towards the Golden +Horn. There the fog cleared off as it were by flakes, and as you see gauze +curtains lifted away, one by one, before a great fairy scene at the theatre. +This will give idea enough of the fog; the difficulty is to describe the scene +afterwards, which was in truth the great fairy scene, than which it is +impossible to conceive anything more brilliant and magnificent. I can’t go to +any more romantic place than Drury Lane to draw my similes from—Drury Lane, +such as we used to see it in our youth, when to our sight the grand last +pictures of the melodrama or pantomime were as magnificent as any objects of +nature we have seen with maturer eyes. Well, the view of Constantinople is as +fine as any of Stanfield’s best theatrical pictures, seen at the best period of +youth, when fancy had all the bloom on her—when all the heroines who danced +before the scene appeared as ravishing beauties, when there shone an unearthly +splendour about Baker and Diddear—and the sound of the bugles and fiddles, and +the cheerful clang of the cymbals, as the scene unrolled, and the gorgeous +procession meandered triumphantly through it—caused a thrill of pleasure, and +awakened an innocent fulness of sensual enjoyment that is only given to boys. +</p> + +<p> +The above sentence contains the following propositions:- The enjoyments of +boyish fancy are the most intense and delicious in the world. Stanfield’s +panorama used to be the realisation of the most intense youthful fancy. I +puzzle my brains and find no better likeness for the place. The view of +Constantinople resembles the ne plus ultra of a Stanfield diorama, with a +glorious accompaniment of music, spangled houris, warriors, and winding +processions, feasting the eyes and the soul with light, splendour, and harmony. +If you were never in this way during your youth ravished at the play-house, of +course the whole comparison is useless: and you have no idea, from this +description, of the effect which Constantinople produces on the mind. But if +you were never affected by a theatre, no words can work upon your fancy, and +typographical attempts to move it are of no use. For, suppose we combine +mosque, minaret, gold, cypress, water, blue, caiques, seventy-four, Galata, +Tophana, Ramazan, Backallum, and so forth, together, in ever so many ways, your +imagination will never be able to depict a city out of them. Or, suppose I say +the Mosque of St. Sophia is four hundred and seventy-three feet in height, +measuring from the middle nail of the gilt crescent surmounting the dome to the +ring in the centre stone; the circle of the dome is one hundred and +twenty-three feet in diameter, the windows ninety-seven in number—and all this +may be true, for anything I know to the contrary: yet who is to get an idea of +St. Sophia from dates, proper names, and calculations with a measuring-line? It +can’t be done by giving the age and measurement of all the buildings along the +river, the names of all the boatmen who ply on it. Has your fancy, which +pooh-poohs a simile, faith enough to build a city with a foot-rule? Enough said +about descriptions and similes (though whenever I am uncertain of one I am +naturally most anxious to fight for it): it is a scene not perhaps sublime, but +charming, magnificent, and cheerful beyond any I have ever seen—the most superb +combination of city and gardens, domes and shipping, hills and water, with the +healthiest breeze blowing over it, and above it the brightest and most cheerful +sky. +</p> + +<p> +It is proper, they say, to be disappointed on entering the town, or any of the +various quarters of it, because the houses are not so magnificent on inspection +and seen singly as they are when beheld en masse from the waters. But why form +expectations so lofty? If you see a group of peasants picturesquely disposed at +a fair, you don’t suppose that they are all faultless beauties, or that the +men’s coats have no rags, and the women’s gowns are made of silk and velvet: +the wild ugliness of the interior of Constantinople or Pera has a charm of its +own, greatly more amusing than rows of red bricks or drab stones, however +symmetrical. With brick or stone they could never form those fantastic +ornaments, railings, balconies, roofs, galleries, which jut in and out of the +rugged houses of the city. As we went from Galata to Pera up a steep hill, +which newcomers ascend with some difficulty, but which a porter, with a couple +of hundredweight on his back, paces up without turning a hair, I thought the +wooden houses far from being disagreeable objects, sights quite as surprising +and striking as the grand one we had just left. +</p> + +<p> +I do not know how the custom-house of His Highness is made to be a profitable +speculation. As I left the ship, a man pulled after my boat, and asked for +backsheesh, which was given him to the amount of about twopence. He was a +custom-house officer, but I doubt whether this sum which he levied ever went to +the revenue. +</p> + +<p> +I can fancy the scene about the quays somewhat to resemble the river of London +in olden times, before coal-smoke had darkened the whole city with soot, and +when, according to the old writers, there really was bright weather. The fleets +of caiques bustling along the shore, or scudding over the blue water, are +beautiful to look at: in Hollar’s print London river is so studded over with +wherry- boats, which bridges and steamers have since destroyed. Here the caique +is still in full perfection: there are thirty thousand boats of the kind plying +between the cities; every boat is neat, and trimly carved and painted; and I +scarcely saw a man pulling in one of them that was not a fine specimen of his +race, brawny and brown, with an open chest and a handsome face. They wear a +thin shirt of exceedingly light cotton, which leaves their fine brown limbs +full play; and with a purple sea for a background, every one of these dashing +boats forms a brilliant and glittering picture. Passengers squat in the inside +of the boat; so that as it passes you see little more than the heads of the +true believers, with their red fez and blue tassel, and that placid gravity of +expression which the sucking of a tobacco-pipe is sure to give to a man. +</p> + +<p> +The Bosphorus is enlivened by a multiplicity of other kinds of craft. There are +the dirty men-of-war’s boats of the Russians, with unwashed mangy crews; the +great ferry-boats carrying hundreds of passengers to the villages; the +melon-boats piled up with enormous golden fruit; His Excellency the Pasha’s +boat, with twelve men bending to their oars; and His Highness’s own caique, +with a head like a serpent, and eight-and-twenty tugging oarsmen, that goes +shooting by amidst the thundering of the cannon. Ships and steamers, with black +sides and flaunting colours, are moored everywhere, showing their flags, +Russian and English, Austrian, American, and Greek; and along the quays country +ships from the Black Sea or the islands, with high carved poops and bows, such +as you see in the pictures of the shipping of the seventeenth century. The vast +groves and towers, domes and quays, tall minarets and spired spreading mosques +of the three cities, rise all around in endless magnificence and variety, and +render this water-street a scene of such delightful liveliness and beauty, that +one never tires of looking at it. I lost a great number of the sights in and +round Constantinople through the beauty of this admirable scene: but what are +sights after all? and isn’t that the best sight which makes you most happy? +</p> + +<p> +We were lodged at Pera at Misseri’s Hotel, the host of which has been made +famous ere this time by the excellent book “Eothen,”—a work for which all the +passengers on board our ship had been battling, and which had charmed all—from +our great statesman, our polished lawyer, our young Oxonian, who sighed over +certain passages that he feared were wicked, down to the writer of this, who, +after perusing it with delight, laid it down with wonder, exclaiming, “Aut +Diabolus aut”—a book which has since (greatest miracle of all) excited a +feeling of warmth and admiration in the bosom of the god-like, impartial, stony +Athenaeum. Misseri, the faithful and chivalrous Tartar, is transformed into the +most quiet and gentlemanlike of landlords, a great deal more gentlemanlike in +manner and appearance than most of us who sat at his table, and smoked cool +pipes on his house-top, as we looked over the hill and the Russian palace to +the water, and the Seraglio gardens shining in the blue. We confronted Misseri, +“Eothen” in hand, and found, on examining him, that it WAS “aut Diabolus aut +amicus”—but the name is a secret; I will never breathe it, though I am dying to +tell it. +</p> + +<p> +The last good description of a Turkish bath, I think, was Lady Mary Wortley +Montagu’s—which voluptuous picture must have been painted at least a hundred +and thirty years ago; so that another sketch may be attempted by a humbler +artist in a different manner. The Turkish bath is certainly a novel sensation +to an Englishman, and may be set down as a most queer and surprising event of +his life. I made the valet-de-place or dragoman (it is rather a fine thing to +have a dragoman in one’s service) conduct me forthwith to the best appointed +hummums in the neighbourhood; and we walked to a house at Tophana, and into a +spacious hall lighted from above, which is the cooling-room of the bath. +</p> + +<p> +The spacious hall has a large fountain in the midst, a painted gallery running +round it; and many ropes stretched from one gallery to another, ornamented with +profuse draperies of towels and blue cloths, for the use of the frequenters of +the place. All round the room and the galleries were matted inclosures, fitted +with numerous neat beds and cushions for reposing on, where lay a dozen of true +believers smoking, or sleeping, or in the happy half-dozing state. I was led up +to one of these beds, to rather a retired corner, in consideration of my +modesty; and to the next bed presently came a dancing dervish, who forthwith +began to prepare for the bath. +</p> + +<p> +When the dancing dervish had taken off his yellow sugar-loaf cap, his gown, +shawl, &c., he was arrayed in two large blue cloths; a white one being +thrown over his shoulders, and another in the shape of a turban plaited neatly +round his head; the garments of which he divested himself were folded up in +another linen, and neatly put by. I beg leave to state I was treated in +precisely the same manner as the dancing dervish. +</p> + +<p> +The reverend gentleman then put on a pair of wooden pattens, which elevated him +about six inches from the ground; and walked down the stairs, and paddled +across the moist marble floor of the hall, and in at a little door, by the +which also Titmarsh entered. But I had none of the professional agility of the +dancing dervish; I staggered about very ludicrously upon the high wooden +pattens; and should have been down on my nose several times, had not the +dragoman and the master of the bath supported me down the stairs and across the +hall. Dressed in three large cotton napkins, with a white turban round my head, +I thought of Pall Mall with a sort of despair. I passed the little door, it was +closed behind me—I was in the dark—I couldn’t speak the language—in a white +turban. Mon Dieu! what was going to happen? +</p> + +<p> +The dark room was the tepidarium, a moist oozing arched den, with a light +faintly streaming from an orifice in the domed ceiling. Yells of frantic +laughter and song came booming and clanging through the echoing arches, the +doors clapped to with loud reverberations. It was the laughter of the followers +of Mahound, rollicking and taking their pleasure in the public bath. I could +not go into that place: I swore I would not; they promised me a private room, +and the dragoman left me. My agony at parting from that Christian cannot be +described. +</p> + +<p> +When you get into the sudarium, or hot room, your first sensations only occur +about half a minute after entrance, when you feel that you are choking. I found +myself in that state, seated on a marble slab; the bath man was gone; he had +taken away the cotton turban and shoulder shawl: I saw I was in a narrow room +of marble, with a vaulted roof, and a fountain of warm and cold water; the +atmosphere was in a steam, the choking sensation went off, and I felt a sort of +pleasure presently in a soft boiling simmer, which, no doubt, potatoes feel +when they are steaming. You are left in this state for about ten minutes: it is +warm certainly, but odd and pleasant, and disposes the mind to reverie. +</p> + +<p> +But let any delicate mind in Baker Street fancy my horror when, on looking up +out of this reverie, I saw a great brown wretch extended before me, only half +dressed, standing on pattens, and exaggerated by them and the steam until he +looked like an ogre, grinning in the most horrible way, and waving his arm, on +which was a horsehair glove. He spoke, in his unknown nasal jargon, words which +echoed through the arched room; his eyes seemed astonishingly large and bright, +his ears stuck out, and his head was all shaved, except a bristling top-knot, +which gave it a demoniac fierceness. +</p> + +<p> +This description, I feel, is growing too frightful; ladies who read it will be +going into hysterics, or saying, “Well, upon my word, this is the most +singular, the most extraordinary kind of language. Jane, my love, you will not +read that odious book—” and so I will be brief. This grinning man belabours the +patient violently with the horse-brush. When he has completed the horsehair +part, and you lie expiring under a squirting fountain of warm water, and +fancying all is done, he reappears with a large brass basin, containing a +quantity of lather, in the midst of which is something like old Miss +MacWhirter’s flaxen wig that she is so proud of, and that we have all laughed +at. Just as you are going to remonstrate, the thing like the wig is dashed into +your face and eyes, covered over with soap, and for five minutes you are +drowned in lather: you can’t see, the suds are frothing over your eye-balls; +you can’t hear, the soap is whizzing into your ears; can’t gasp for breath, +Miss MacWhirter’s wig is down your throat with half a pailful of suds in an +instant—you are all soap. Wicked children in former days have jeered you, +exclaiming, “How are you off for soap?” You little knew what saponacity was +till you entered a Turkish bath. +</p> + +<p> +When the whole operation is concluded, you are led—with what heartfelt joy I +need not say—softly back to the cooling-room, having been robed in shawls and +turbans as before. You are laid gently on the reposing bed; somebody brings a +narghile, which tastes as tobacco must taste in Mahomet’s Paradise; a cool +sweet dreamy languor takes possession of the purified frame; and half-an- hour +of such delicious laziness is spent over the pipe as is unknown in Europe, +where vulgar prejudice has most shamefully maligned indolence—calls it foul +names, such as the father of all evil, and the like; in fact, does not know how +to educate idleness as those honest Turks do, and the fruit which, when +properly cultivated, it bears. +</p> + +<p> +The after-bath state is the most delightful condition of laziness I ever knew, +and I tried it wherever we went afterwards on our little tour. At Smyrna the +whole business was much inferior to the method employed in the capital. At +Cairo, after the soap, you are plunged into a sort of stone coffin, full of +water which is all but boiling. This has its charms; but I could not relish the +Egyptian shampooing. A hideous old blind man (but very dexterous in his art) +tried to break my back and dislocate my shoulders, but I could not see the +pleasure of the practice; and another fellow began tickling the soles of my +feet, but I rewarded him with a kick that sent him off the bench. The pure +idleness is the best, and I shall never enjoy such in Europe again. +</p> + +<p> +Victor Hugo, in his famous travels on the Rhine, visiting Cologne, gives a +learned account of what he DIDN’T see there. I have a remarkable catalogue of +similar objects at Constantinople. I didn’t see the dancing dervishes, it was +Ramazan; nor the howling dervishes at Scutari, it was Ramazan; nor the interior +of St. Sophia, nor the women’s apartment of the Seraglio, nor the fashionable +promenade at the Sweet Waters, always because it was Ramazan; during which +period the dervishes dance and howl but rarely, their legs and lungs being +unequal to much exertion during a fast of fifteen hours. On account of the same +holy season, the Royal palaces and mosques are shut; and though the Valley of +the Sweet Waters is there, no one goes to walk; the people remaining asleep all +day, and passing the night in feasting and carousing. The minarets are +illuminated at this season; even the humblest mosque at Jerusalem, or Jaffa, +mounted a few circles of dingy lamps; those of the capital were handsomely +lighted with many festoons of lamps, which had a fine effect from the water. I +need not mention other and constant illuminations of the city, which +innumerable travellers have described—I mean the fires. There were three in +Pera during our eight days’ stay there; but they did not last long enough to +bring the Sultan out of bed to come and lend his aid. Mr. Hobhouse (quoted in +the “Guide-book”) says, if a fire lasts an hour, the Sultan is bound to attend +it in person; and that people having petitions to present, have often set +houses on fire for the purpose of forcing out this Royal trump. The Sultan +can’t lead a very “jolly life,” if this rule be universal. Fancy His Highness, +in the midst of his moon-faced beauties, handkerchief in hand, and obliged to +tie it round his face, and go out of his warm harem at midnight at the cursed +cry of “Yang en Var!” +</p> + +<p> +We saw His Highness in the midst of his people and their petitions, when he +came to the mosque at Tophana; not the largest, but one of the most picturesque +of the public buildings of the city. The streets were crowded with people +watching for the august arrival, and lined with the squat military in their +bastard European costume; the sturdy police, with bandeliers and brown +surtouts, keeping order, driving off the faithful from the railings of the +Esplanade through which their Emperor was to pass, and only admitting (with a +very unjust partiality, I thought) us Europeans into that reserved space. +Before the august arrival, numerous officers collected, colonels and pashas +went by with their attendant running footmen; the most active, insolent, and +hideous of these great men, as I thought, being His Highness’s black eunuchs, +who went prancing through the crowd, which separated before them with every +sign of respect. +</p> + +<p> +The common women were assembled by many hundreds: the yakmac, a muslin +chin-cloth which they wear, makes almost every face look the same; but the eyes +and noses of these beauties are generally visible, and, for the most part, both +these features are good. The jolly negresses wear the same white veil, but they +are by no means so particular about hiding the charms of their good-natured +black faces, and they let the cloth blow about as it lists, and grin +unconfined. Wherever we went the negroes seemed happy. They have the organ of +child-loving: little creatures were always prattling on their shoulders, queer +little things in night gowns of yellow dimity, with great flowers, and pink or +red or yellow shawls, with great eyes glistening underneath. Of such the black +women seemed always the happy guardians. I saw one at a fountain, holding one +child in her arms, and giving another a drink—a ragged little beggar—a sweet +and touching picture of a black charity. +</p> + +<p> +I am almost forgetting His Highness the Sultan. About a hundred guns were fired +off at clumsy intervals from the Esplanade facing the Bosphorus, warning us +that the monarch had set off from his Summer Palace, and was on the way to his +grand canoe. At last that vessel made its appearance; the band struck up his +favourite air; his caparisoned horse was led down to the shore to receive him; +the eunuchs, fat pashas, colonels and officers of state gathering round as the +Commander of the Faithful mounted. I had the indescribable happiness of seeing +him at a very short distance. The Padishah, or Father of all the Sovereigns on +earth, has not that majestic air which some sovereigns possess, and which makes +the beholder’s eyes wink, and his knees tremble under him: he has a black +beard, and a handsome well-bred face, of a French cast; he looks like a young +French roue worn out by debauch; his eyes bright, with black rings round them; +his cheeks pale and hollow. He was lolling on his horse as if he could hardly +hold himself on the saddle: or as if his cloak, fastened with a blazing diamond +clasp on his breast, and falling over his horse’s tail, pulled him back. But +the handsome sallow face of the Refuge of the World looked decidedly +interesting and intellectual. I have seen many a young Don Juan at Paris, +behind a counter, with such a beard and countenance; the flame of passion still +burning in his hollow eyes, while on his damp brow was stamped the fatal mark +of premature decay. The man we saw cannot live many summers. Women and wine are +said to have brought the Zilullah to this state; and it is whispered by the +dragomans, or laquais-de-place (from whom travellers at Constantinople +generally get their political information), that the Sultan’s mother and his +ministers conspire to keep him plunged in sensuality, that they may govern the +kingdom according to their own fancies. Mr. Urquhart, I am sure, thinks that +Lord Palmerston has something to do with the business, and drugs the Sultan’s +champagne for the benefit of Russia. +</p> + +<p> +As the Pontiff of Mussulmans passed into the mosques a shower of petitions was +flung from the steps where the crowd was collected, and over the heads of the +gendarmes in brown. A general cry, as for justice, rose up; and one old ragged +woman came forward and burst through the throng, howling, and flinging about +her lean arms, and baring her old shrunken breast. I never saw a finer action +of tragic woo, or heard sounds more pitiful than those old passionate groans of +hers. What was your prayer, poor old wretched soul? The gendarmes hemmed her +round, and hustled her away, but rather kindly. The Padishah went on quite +impassible—the picture of debauch and ennui. +</p> + +<p> +I like pointing morals, and inventing for myself cheap consolations, to +reconcile me to that state of life into which it has pleased Heaven to call me; +and as the Light of the World disappeared round the corner, I reasoned +pleasantly with myself about His Highness, and enjoyed that secret selfish +satisfaction a man has, who sees he is better off than his neighbour. “Michael +Angelo,” I said, “you are still (by courtesy) young: if you had five hundred +thousand a year, and were a great prince, I would lay a wager that men would +discover in you a magnificent courtesy of demeanour, and a majestic presence +that only belongs to the sovereigns of the world. If you had such an income, +you think you could spend it with splendour: distributing genial hospitalities, +kindly alms, soothing misery, bidding humility be of good heart, rewarding +desert. If you had such means of purchasing pleasure, you think, you rogue, you +could relish it with gusto. But fancy being brought to the condition of the +poor Light of the Universe yonder; and reconcile yourself with the idea that +you are only a farthing rushlight. The cries of the poor widow fall as dead +upon him as the smiles of the brightest eyes out of Georgia. He can’t stir +abroad but those abominable cannon begin roaring and deafening his ears. He +can’t see the world but over the shoulders of a row of fat pashas, and eunuchs, +with their infernal ugliness. His ears can never be regaled with a word of +truth, or blessed with an honest laugh. The only privilege of manhood left to +him, he enjoys but for a month in the year, at this time of Ramazan, when he is +forced to fast for fifteen hours; and, by consequence, has the blessing of +feeling hungry.” Sunset during Lent appears to be his single moment of +pleasure; they say the poor fellow is ravenous by that time, and as the gun +fires the dish-covers are taken off, so that for five minutes a day he lives +and is happy over pillau, like another mortal. +</p> + +<p> +And yet, when floating by the Summer Palace, a barbaric edifice of wood and +marble, with gilded suns blazing over the porticoes, and all sorts of strange +ornaments and trophies figuring on the gates and railings—when we passed a long +row of barred and filigreed windows, looking on the water—when we were told +that those were the apartments of His Highness’s ladies, and actually heard +them whispering and laughing behind the bars—a strange feeling of curiosity +came over some ill-regulated minds—just to have one peep, one look at all those +wondrous beauties, singing to the dulcimers, paddling in the fountains, dancing +in the marble halls, or lolling on the golden cushions, as the gaudy black +slaves brought pipes and coffee. This tumultuous movement was calmed by +thinking of that dreadful statement of travellers, that in one of the most +elegant halls there is a trap-door, on peeping below which you may see the +Bosphorus running underneath, into which some luckless beauty is plunged +occasionally, and the trap-door is shut, and the dancing and the singing, and +the smoking and the laughing go on as before. They say it is death to pick up +any of the sacks thereabouts, if a stray one should float by you. There were +none any day when I passed, AT LEAST, ON THE SURFACE OF THE WATER. +</p> + +<p> +It has been rather a fashion of our travellers to apologise for Turkish life, +of late, and paint glowing agreeable pictures of many of its institutions. The +celebrated author of “Palm-Leaves” (his name is famous under the date-trees of +the Nile, and uttered with respect beneath the tents of the Bedaween) has +touchingly described Ibrahim Pasha’s paternal fondness, who cut off a black +slave’s head for having dropped and maimed one of his children; and has penned +a melodious panegyric of “The Harem,” and of the fond and beautiful duties of +the inmates of that place of love, obedience, and seclusion. I saw, at the +mausoleum of the late Sultan Mahmoud’s family, a good subject for a Ghazul, in +the true new Oriental manner. +</p> + +<p> +These Royal burial-places are the resort of the pious Moslems. Lamps are kept +burning there; and in the antechambers, copies of the Koran are provided for +the use of believers; and you never pass these cemeteries but you see Turks +washing at the cisterns, previous to entering for prayer, or squatted on the +benches, chanting passages from the sacred volume. Christians, I believe, are +not admitted, but may look through the bars, and see the coffins of the defunct +monarchs and children of the Royal race. Each lies in his narrow sarcophagus, +which is commonly flanked by huge candles, and covered with a rich embroidered +pall. At the head of each coffin rises a slab, with a gilded inscription; for +the princesses, the slab is simple, not unlike our own monumental stones. The +headstones of the tombs of the defunct princes are decorated with a turban, or, +since the introduction of the latter article of dress, with the red fez. That +of Mahmoud is decorated with the imperial aigrette. +</p> + +<p> +In this dismal but splendid museum, I remarked two little tombs with little red +fezzes, very small, and for very young heads evidently, which were lying under +the little embroidered palls of state. I forget whether they had candles too; +but their little flame of life was soon extinguished, and there was no need of +many pounds of wax to typify it. These were the tombs of Mahmoud’s grandsons, +nephews of the present Light of the Universe, and children of his sister, the +wife of Halil Pasha. Little children die in all ways: these of the +much-maligned Mahometan Royal race perished by the bowstring. Sultan Mahmoud +(may he rest in glory!) strangled the one; but, having some spark of human +feeling, was so moved by the wretchedness and agony of the poor bereaved +mother, his daughter, that his Royal heart relented towards her, and he +promised that, should she ever have another child, it should be allowed to +live. He died; and Abdul Medjid (may his name be blessed!), the debauched young +man whom we just saw riding to the mosque, succeeded. His sister, whom he is +said to have loved, became again a mother, and had a son. But she relied upon +her father’s word and her august brother’s love, and hoped that this little one +should be spared. The same accursed hand tore this infant out of its mother’s +bosom, and killed it. The poor woman’s heart broke outright at this second +calamity, and she died. But on her death-bed she sent for her brother, rebuked +him as a perjurer and an assassin, and expired calling down the divine justice +on his head. She lies now by the side of the two little fezzes. +</p> + +<p> +Now I say this would be a fine subject for an Oriental poem. The details are +dramatic and noble, and could be grandly touched by a fine artist. If the +mother had borne a daughter, the child would have been safe; that perplexity +might be pathetically depicted as agitating the bosom of the young wife about +to become a mother. A son is born: you can see her despair and the pitiful look +she casts on the child, and the way in which she hugs it every time the +curtains of her door are removed. The Sultan hesitated probably; he allowed the +infant to live for six weeks. He could not bring his Royal soul to inflict +pain. He yields at last; he is a martyr- -to be pitied, not to be blamed. If he +melts at his daughter’s agony, he is a man and a father. There are men and +fathers too in the much-maligned Orient. +</p> + +<p> +Then comes the second act of the tragedy. The new hopes, the fond yearnings, +the terrified misgivings, the timid belief, and weak confidence; the child that +is born—and dies smiling prettily—and the mother’s heart is rent so, that it +can love, or hope, or suffer no more. Allah is God! She sleeps by the little +fezzes. Hark! the guns are booming over the water, and His Highness is coming +from his prayers. +</p> + +<p> +After the murder of that little child, it seems to me one can never look with +anything but horror upon the butcherly Herod who ordered it. The death of the +seventy thousand Janissaries ascends to historic dignity, and takes rank as +war. But a great Prince and Light of the Universe, who procures abortions and +throttles little babies, dwindles away into such a frightful insignificance of +crime, that those may respect him who will. I pity their Excellencies the +Ambassadors, who are obliged to smirk and cringe to such a rascal. To do the +Turks justice—and two days’ walk in Constantinople will settle this fact as +well as a year’s residence in the city—the people do not seem in the least +animated by this Herodian spirit. I never saw more kindness to children than +among all classes, more fathers walking about with little solemn Mahometans in +red caps and big trousers, more business going on than in the toy quarter, and +in the Atmeidan. Although you may see there the Thebaic stone set up by the +Emperor Theodosius, and the bronze column of serpents which Murray says was +brought from Delphi, but which my guide informed me was the very one exhibited +by Moses in the wilderness, yet I found the examination of these antiquities +much less pleasant than to look at the many troops of children assembled on the +plain to play; and to watch them as they were dragged about in little queer +arobas, or painted carriages, which are there kept for hire. I have a picture +of one of them now in my eyes: a little green oval machine, with flowers rudely +painted round the window, out of which two smiling heads are peeping, the +pictures of happiness. An old, good-humoured, grey- bearded Turk is tugging the +cart; and behind it walks a lady in a yakmac and yellow slippers, and a black +female slave, grinning as usual, towards whom the little coach-riders are +looking. A small sturdy barefooted Mussulman is examining the cart with some +feelings of envy: he is too poor to purchase a ride for himself and the +round-faced puppy-dog, which he is hugging in his arms as young ladies in our +country do dolls. +</p> + +<p> +All the neighbourhood of the Atmeidan is exceedingly picturesque— the mosque +court and cloister, where the Persians have their stalls of sweetmeats and +tobacco; a superb sycamore-tree grows in the middle of this, overshadowing an +aromatic fountain; great flocks of pigeons are settling in corners of the +cloister, and barley is sold at the gates, with which the good-natured people +feed them. From the Atmeidan you have a fine view of St. Sophia: and here +stands a mosque which struck me as being much more picturesque and +sumptuous—the Mosque of Sultan Achmed, with its six gleaming white minarets and +its beautiful courts and trees. Any infidels may enter the court without +molestation, and, looking through the barred windows of the mosque, have a view +of its airy and spacious interior. A small audience of women was collected +there when I looked in, squatted on the mats, and listening to a preacher, who +was walking among them, and speaking with great energy. My dragoman interpreted +to me the sense of a few words of his sermon: he was warning them of the danger +of gadding about to public places, and of the immorality of too much talking; +and, I dare say, we might have had more valuable information from him regarding +the follies of womankind, had not a tall Turk clapped my interpreter on the +shoulder, and pointed him to be off. +</p> + +<p> +Although the ladies are veiled, and muffled with the ugliest dresses in the +world, yet it appears their modesty is alarmed in spite of all the coverings +which they wear. One day, in the bazaar, a fat old body, with diamond rings on +her fingers, that were tinged with henne of a logwood colour, came to the shop +where I was purchasing slippers, with her son, a young Aga of six years of age, +dressed in a braided frock-coat, with a huge tassel to his fez, exceeding fat, +and of a most solemn demeanour. The young Aga came for a pair of shoes, and his +contortions were so delightful as he tried them, that I remained looking on +with great pleasure, wishing for Leech to be at hand to sketch his lordship and +his fat mamma, who sat on the counter. That lady fancied I was looking at her, +though, as far as I could see, she had the figure and complexion of a roly-poly +pudding; and so, with quite a premature bashfulness, she sent me a message by +the shoemaker, ordering me to walk away if I had made my purchases, for that +ladies of her rank did not choose to be stared at by strangers; and I was +obliged to take my leave, though with sincere regret, for the little lord had +just squeezed himself into an attitude than which I never saw anything more +ludicrous in General Tom Thumb. When the ladies of the Seraglio come to that +bazaar with their cortege of infernal black eunuchs, strangers are told to move +on briskly. I saw a bevy of about eight of these, with their aides-de-camp; but +they were wrapped up, and looked just as vulgar and ugly as the other women, +and were not, I suppose, of the most beautiful sort. The poor devils are +allowed to come out, half-a-dozen times in the year, to spend their little +wretched allowance of pocket-money in purchasing trinkets and tobacco; all the +rest of the time they pursue the beautiful duties of their existence in the +walls of the sacred harem. +</p> + +<p> +Though strangers are not allowed to see the interior of the cage in which these +birds of Paradise are confined, yet many parts of the Seraglio are free to the +curiosity of visitors, who choose to drop a backsheesh here and there. I landed +one morning at the Seraglio point from Galata, close by an ancient +pleasure-house of the defunct Sultan; a vast broad-brimmed pavilion, that looks +agreeable enough to be a dancing room for ghosts now: there is another +summer-house, the Guide-book cheerfully says, whither the Sultan goes to sport +with his women and mutes. A regiment of infantry, with their music at their +head, were marching to exercise in the outer grounds of the Seraglio; and we +followed them, and had an opportunity of seeing their evolutions, and hearing +their bands, upon a fine green plain under the Seraglio walls, where stands one +solitary column, erected in memory of some triumph of some Byzantian emperor. +</p> + +<p> +There were three battalions of the Turkish infantry, exercising here; and they +seemed to perform their evolutions in a very satisfactory manner: that is, they +fired all together, and charged and halted in very straight lines, and bit off +imaginary cartridge- tops with great fierceness and regularity, and made all +their ramrods ring to measure, just like so many Christians. The men looked +small, young, clumsy, and ill-built; uncomfortable in their shabby European +clothes; and about the legs, especially, seemed exceedingly weak and +ill-formed. Some score of military invalids were lolling in the sunshine, about +a fountain and a marble summer- house that stand on the ground, watching their +comrades’ manoeuvres (as if they could never have enough of that delightful +pastime); and these sick were much better cared for than their healthy +companions. Each man had two dressing-gowns, one of white cotton, and an outer +wrapper of warm brown woollen. Their heads were accommodated with wadded cotton +nightcaps; and it seemed to me, from their condition and from the excellent +character of the military hospitals, that it would be much more wholesome to be +ill than to be well in the Turkish service. +</p> + +<p> +Facing this green esplanade, and the Bosphorus shining beyond it, rise the +great walls of the outer Seraglio Gardens: huge masses of ancient masonry, over +which peep the roofs of numerous kiosks and outhouses, amongst thick +evergreens, planted so as to hide the beautiful frequenters of the place from +the prying eyes and telescopes. We could not catch a glance of a single figure +moving in these great pleasure-grounds. The road winds round the walls; and the +outer park, which is likewise planted with trees, and diversified by +garden-plots and cottages, had more the air of the outbuildings of a homely +English park, than of a palace which we must all have imagined to be the most +stately in the world. The most commonplace water-carts were passing here and +there; roads were being repaired in the Macadamite manner; and carpenters were +mending the park-palings, just as they do in Hampshire. The next thing you +might fancy would be the Sultan walking out with a spud and a couple of dogs, +on the way to meet the post-bag and the Saint James’s Chronicle. +</p> + +<p> +The palace is no palace at all. It is a great town of pavilions, built without +order, here and there, according to the fancy of succeeding Lights of the +Universe, or their favourites. The only row of domes which looked particularly +regular or stately, were the kitchens. As you examined the buildings they had a +ruinous dilapidated look: they are not furnished, it is said, with particular +splendour,—not a bit more elegantly than Miss Jones’s seminary for young +ladies, which we may be sure is much more comfortable than the extensive +establishment of His Highness Abdul Medjid. +</p> + +<p> +In the little stable I thought to see some marks of Royal magnificence, and +some horses worthy of the king of all kings. But the Sultan is said to be a +very timid horseman: the animal that is always kept saddled for him did not +look to be worth twenty pounds; and the rest of the horses in the shabby dirty +stalls were small, ill-kept, common-looking brutes. You might see better, it +seemed to me, at a country inn stable on any market-day. +</p> + +<p> +The kitchens are the most sublime part of the Seraglio. There are nine of these +great halls, for all ranks, from His Highness downwards, where many hecatombs +are roasted daily, according to the accounts, and where cooking goes on with a +savage Homeric grandeur. Chimneys are despised in these primitive halls; so +that the roofs are black with the smoke of hundreds of furnaces, which escapes +through apertures in the domes above. These, too, give the chief light in the +rooms, which streams downwards, and thickens and mingles with the smoke, and so +murkily lights up hundreds of swarthy figures busy about the spits and the +cauldrons. Close to the door by which we entered they were making pastry for +the sultanas; and the chief pastrycook, who knew my guide, invited us +courteously to see the process, and partake of the delicacies prepared for +those charming lips. How those sweet lips must shine after eating these puffs! +First, huge sheets of dough are rolled out till the paste is about as thin as +silver paper: then an artist forms the dough-muslin into a sort of drapery, +curling it round and round in many fanciful and pretty shapes, until it is all +got into the circumference of a round metal tray in which it is baked. Then the +cake is drenched in grease most profusely; and, finally, a quantity of syrup is +poured over it, when the delectable mixture is complete. The moon-faced ones +are said to devour immense quantities of this wholesome food; and, in fact, are +eating grease and sweetmeats from morning till night. I don’t like to think +what the consequences may be, or allude to the agonies which the delicate +creatures must inevitably suffer. +</p> + +<p> +The good-natured chief pastrycook filled a copper basin with greasy puffs; and, +dipping a dubious ladle into a large cauldron, containing several gallons of +syrup, poured a liberal portion over the cakes, and invited us to eat. One of +the tarts was quite enough for me: and I excused myself on the plea of +ill-health from imbibing any more grease and sugar. But my companion, the +dragoman, finished some forty puffs in a twinkling. They slipped down his +opened jaws as the sausages do down clowns’ throats in a pantomime. His +moustaches shone with grease, and it dripped down his beard and fingers. We +thanked the smiling chief pastrycook, and rewarded him handsomely for the +tarts. It is something to have eaten of the dainties prepared for the ladies of +the harem; but I think Mr. Cockle ought to get the names of the chief sultanas +among the exalted patrons of his antibilious pills. +</p> + +<p> +From the kitchens we passed into the second court of the Seraglio, beyond which +is death. The Guide-book only hints at the dangers which would befall a +stranger caught prying in the mysterious FIRST court of the palace. I have read +“Bluebeard,” and don’t care for peeping into forbidden doors; so that the +second court was quite enough for me; the pleasure of beholding it being +heightened, as it were, by the notion of the invisible danger sitting next +door, with uplifted scimitar ready to fall on you—present though not seen. +</p> + +<p> +A cloister runs along one side of this court; opposite is the hall of the +divan, “large but low, covered with lead, and gilt, after the Moorish manner, +plain enough.” The Grand Vizier sits in this place, and the ambassadors used to +wait here, and be conducted hence on horseback, attired with robes of honour. +But the ceremony is now, I believe, discontinued; the English envoy, at any +rate, is not allowed to receive any backsheesh, and goes away as he came, in +the habit of his own nation. On the right is a door leading into the interior +of the Seraglio; NONE PASS THROUGH IT BUT SUCH AS ARE SENT FOR, the Guide-book +says: it is impossible to top the terror of that description. +</p> + +<p> +About this door lads and servants were lolling, ichoglans and pages, with lazy +looks and shabby dresses; and among them, sunning himself sulkily on a bench, a +poor old fat, wrinkled, dismal white eunuch, with little fat white hands, and a +great head sunk into his chest, and two sprawling little legs that seemed +incapable to hold up his bloated old body. He squeaked out some surly reply to +my friend the dragoman, who, softened and sweetened by the tarts he had just +been devouring, was, no doubt, anxious to be polite: and the poor worthy fellow +walked away rather crestfallen at this return of his salutation, and hastened +me out of the place. +</p> + +<p> +The palace of the Seraglio, the cloister with marble pillars, the hall of the +ambassadors, the impenetrable gate guarded by eunuchs and ichoglans, have a +romantic look in print; but not so in reality. Most of the marble is wood, +almost all the gilding is faded, the guards are shabby, the foolish +perspectives painted on the walls are half cracked off. The place looks like +Vauxhall in the daytime. +</p> + +<p> +We passed out of the second court under THE SUBLIME PORTE—which is like a +fortified gate of a German town of the middle ages—into the outer court, round +which are public offices, hospitals, and dwellings of the multifarious servants +of the palace. This place is very wide and picturesque: there is a pretty +church of Byzantine architecture at the further end; and in the midst of the +court a magnificent plane-tree, of prodigious dimensions and fabulous age +according to the guides; St. Sophia towers in the further distance: and from +here, perhaps, is the best view of its light swelling domes and beautiful +proportions. The Porte itself, too, forms an excellent subject for the +sketcher, if the officers of the court will permit him to design it. I made the +attempt, and a couple of Turkish beadles looked on very good-naturedly for some +time at the progress of the drawing; but a good number of other spectators +speedily joined them, and made a crowd, which is not permitted, it would seem, +in the Seraglio; so I was told to pack up my portfolio, and remove the cause of +the disturbance, and lost my drawing of the Ottoman Porte. +</p> + +<p> +I don’t think I have anything more to say about the city which has not been +much better told by graver travellers. I, with them, could see (perhaps it was +the preaching of the politicians that warned me of the fact) that we are +looking on at the last days of an empire; and heard many stories of weakness, +disorder, and oppression. I even saw a Turkish lady drive up to Sultan Achmet’s +mosque IN A BROUGHAM. Is not that a subject to moralise upon? And might one not +draw endless conclusions from it, that the knell of the Turkish dominion is +rung; that the European spirit and institutions once admitted can never be +rooted out again; and that the scepticism prevalent amongst the higher orders +must descend ere very long to the lower; and the cry of the muezzin from the +mosque become a mere ceremony? +</p> + +<p> +But as I only stayed eight days in this place, and knew not a syllable of the +language, perhaps it is as well to pretermit any disquisitions about the spirit +of the people. I can only say that they looked to be very good-natured, +handsome, and lazy; that the women’s yellow slippers are very ugly; that the +kabobs at the shop hard by the Rope Bazaar are very hot and good; and that at +the Armenian cookshops they serve you delicious fish, and a stout raisin wine +of no small merit. There came in, as we sat and dined there at sunset, a good +old Turk, who called for a penny fish, and sat down under a tree very humbly, +and ate it with his own bread. We made that jolly old Mussulman happy with a +quart of the raisin wine; and his eyes twinkled with every fresh glass, and he +wiped his old beard delighted, and talked and chirped a good deal, and, I dare +say, told us the whole state of the empire. He was the only Mussulman with whom +I attained any degree of intimacy during my stay in Constantinople; and you +will see that, for obvious reasons, I cannot divulge the particulars of our +conversation. +</p> + +<p> +“You have nothing to say, and you own it,” says somebody: “then why write?” +That question perhaps (between ourselves) I have put likewise; and yet, my dear +sir, there are SOME things worth remembering even in this brief letter: that +woman in the brougham is an idea of significance: that comparison of the +Seraglio to Vauxhall in the daytime is a true and real one; from both of which +your own great soul and ingenious philosophic spirit may draw conclusions, that +I myself have modestly forborne to press. You are too clever to require a moral +to be tacked to all the fables you read, as is done for children in the +spelling-books; else I would tell you that the government of the Ottoman Porte +seems to be as rotten, as wrinkled, and as feeble as the old eunuch I saw +crawling about it in the sun; that when the lady drove up in a brougham to +Sultan Achmet, I felt that the schoolmaster was really abroad; and that the +crescent will go out before that luminary, as meekly as the moon does before +the sun. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0008"></a> +CHAPTER VIII<br/> +RHODES</h2> + +<p> +The sailing of a vessel direct for Jaffa brought a great number of passengers +together, and our decks were covered with Christian, Jew, and Heathen. In the +cabin we were Poles and Russians, Frenchmen, Germans, Spaniards, and Greeks; on +the deck were squatted several little colonies of people of different race and +persuasion. There was a Greek Papa, a noble figure with a flowing and venerable +white beard, who had been living on bread-and-water for I don’t know how many +years, in order to save a little money to make the pilgrimage to Jerusalem. +There were several families of Jewish Rabbis, who celebrated their “feast of +tabernacles” on board; their chief men performing worship twice or thrice a +day, dressed in their pontifical habits, and bound with phylacteries: and there +were Turks, who had their own ceremonies and usages, and wisely kept aloof from +their neighbours of Israel. +</p> + +<p> +The dirt of these children of captivity exceeds all possibility of description; +the profusion of stinks which they raised, the grease of their venerable +garments and faces, the horrible messes cooked in the filthy pots, and devoured +with the nasty fingers, the squalor of mats, pots, old bedding, and foul +carpets of our Hebrew friends, could hardly be painted by Swift in his dirtiest +mood, and cannot be, of course, attempted by my timid and genteel pen. What +would they say in Baker Street to some sights with which our new friends +favoured us? What would your ladyship have said if you had seen the interesting +Greek nun combing her hair over the cabin— combing it with the natural fingers, +and, averse to slaughter, flinging the delicate little intruders, which she +found in the course of her investigation, gently into the great cabin? Our +attention was a good deal occupied in watching the strange ways and customs of +the various comrades of ours. +</p> + +<p> +The Jews were refugees from Poland, going to lay their bones to rest in the +valley of Jehoshaphat, and performing with exceeding rigour the offices of +their religion. At morning and evening you were sure to see the chiefs of the +families, arrayed in white robes, bowing over their books, at prayer. Once a +week, on the eve before the Sabbath, there was a general washing in Jewry, +which sufficed until the ensuing Friday. The men wore long gowns and caps of +fur, or else broad-brimmed hats, or, in service time, bound on their heads +little iron boxes, with the sacred name engraved on them. Among the lads there +were some beautiful faces; and among the women your humble servant discovered +one who was a perfect rosebud of beauty when first emerging from her Friday’s +toilet, and for a day or two afterwards, until each succeeding day’s smut +darkened those fresh and delicate cheeks of hers. We had some very rough +weather in the course of the passage from Constantinople to Jaffa, and the sea +washed over and over our Israelitish friends and their baggages and bundles; +but though they were said to be rich, they would not afford to pay for cabin +shelter. One father of a family, finding his progeny half drowned in a squall, +vowed he WOULD pay for a cabin; but the weather was somewhat finer the next +day, and he could not squeeze out his dollars, and the ship’s authorities would +not admit him except upon payment. +</p> + +<p> +This unwillingness to part with money is not only found amongst the followers +of Moses, but in those of Mahomet, and Christians too. When we went to purchase +in the bazaars, after offering money for change, the honest fellows would +frequently keep back several piastres, and when urged to refund, would give +most dismally: and begin doling out penny by penny, and utter pathetic prayers +to their customer not to take any more. I bought five or six pounds’ worth of +Broussa silks for the womankind, in the bazaar at Constantinople, and the rich +Armenian who sold them begged for three-halfpence to pay his boat to Galata. +There is something naif and amusing in this exhibition of cheatery—this simple +cringing and wheedling, and passion for twopence-halfpenny. It was pleasant to +give a millionaire beggar an alms, and laugh in his face and say, “There, +Dives, there’s a penny for you: be happy, you poor old swindling scoundrel, as +far as a penny goes.” I used to watch these Jews on shore, and making bargains +with one another as soon as they came on board; the battle between vendor and +purchaser was an agony—they shrieked, clasped hands, appealed to one another +passionately; their handsome noble faces assumed a look of woe— quite an heroic +eagerness and sadness about a farthing. +</p> + +<p> +Ambassadors from our Hebrews descended at Rhodes to buy provisions, and it was +curious to see their dealings: there was our venerable Rabbi, who, robed in +white and silver, and bending over his book at the morning service, looked like +a patriarch, and whom I saw chaffering about a fowl with a brother Rhodian +Israelite. How they fought over the body of that lean animal! The street +swarmed with Jews: goggling eyes looked out from the old carved casements— +hooked noses issued from the low antique doors—Jew boys driving donkeys, Hebrew +mothers nursing children, dusky, tawdry, ragged young beauties and most +venerable grey-bearded fathers were all gathered round about the affair of the +hen! And at the same time that our Rabbi was arranging the price of it, his +children were instructed to procure bundles of green branches to decorate the +ship during their feast. Think of the centuries during which these wonderful +people have remained unchanged; and how, from the days of Jacob downwards, they +have believed and swindled! +</p> + +<p> +The Rhodian Jews, with their genius for filth, have made their quarter of the +noble desolate old town the most ruinous and wretched of all. The escutcheons +of the proud old knights are still carved over the doors, whence issue these +miserable greasy hucksters and pedlars. The Turks respected these emblems of +the brave enemies whom they had overcome, and left them untouched. When the +French seized Malta they were by no means so delicate: they effaced armorial +bearings with their usual hot-headed eagerness; and a few years after they had +torn down the coats-of- arms of the gentry, the heroes of Malta and Egypt were +busy devising heraldry for themselves, and were wild to be barons and counts of +the Empire. +</p> + +<p> +The chivalrous relics at Rhodes are very superb. I know of no buildings whose +stately and picturesque aspect seems to correspond better with one’s notions of +their proud founders. The towers and gates are warlike and strong, but +beautiful and aristocratic: you see that they must have been high-bred +gentlemen who built them. The edifices appear in almost as perfect a condition +as when they were in the occupation of the noble Knights of St. John; and they +have this advantage over modern fortifications, that they are a thousand times +more picturesque. Ancient war condescended to ornament itself, and built fine +carved castles and vaulted gates: whereas, to judge from Gibraltar and Malta, +nothing can be less romantic than the modern military architecture; which +sternly regards the fighting, without in the least heeding the war-paint. Some +of the huge artillery with which the place was defended still lies in the +bastions; and the touch-holes of the guns are preserved by being covered with +rusty old corselets, worn by defenders of the fort three hundred years ago. The +Turks, who battered down chivalry, seem to be waiting their turn of destruction +now. In walking through Rhodes one is strangely affected by witnessing the +signs of this double decay. For instance, in the streets of the knights, you +see noble houses, surmounted by noble escutcheons of superb knights, who lived +there, and prayed, and quarrelled, and murdered the Turks; and were the most +gallant pirates of the inland seas; and made vows of chastity, and robbed and +ravished; and, professing humility, would admit none but nobility into their +order; and died recommending themselves to sweet St. John, and calmly hoping +for heaven in consideration of all the heathen they had slain. When this superb +fraternity was obliged to yield to courage as great as theirs, faith as +sincere, and to robbers even more dexterous and audacious than the noblest +knight who ever sang a canticle to the Virgin, these halls were filled by +magnificent Pashas and Agas, who lived here in the intervals of war, and having +conquered its best champions, despised Christendom and chivalry pretty much as +an Englishman despises a Frenchman. Now the famous house is let to a shabby +merchant, who has his little beggarly shop in the bazaar; to a small officer, +who ekes out his wretched pension by swindling, and who gets his pay in bad +coin. Mahometanism pays in pewter now, in place of silver and gold. The lords +of the world have run to seed. The powerless old sword frightens nobody now—the +steel is turned to pewter too, somehow, and will no longer shear a Christian +head off any shoulders. In the Crusades my wicked sympathies have always been +with the Turks. They seem to me the better Christians of the two: more humane, +less brutally presumptuous about their own merits, and more generous in +esteeming their neighbours. As far as I can get at the authentic story, Saladin +is a pearl of refinement compared to the brutal beef-eating Richard—about whom +Sir Walter Scott has led all the world astray. +</p> + +<p> +When shall we have a real account of those times and heroes—no good-humoured +pageant, like those of the Scott romances—but a real authentic story to +instruct and frighten honest people of the present day, and make them thankful +that the grocer governs the world now in place of the baron? Meanwhile a man of +tender feelings may be pardoned for twaddling a little over this sad spectacle +of the decay of two of the great institutions of the world. Knighthood is +gone—amen; it expired with dignity, its face to the foe: and old Mahometanism +is lingering about just ready to drop. But it is unseemly to see such a Grand +Potentate in such a state of decay: the son of Bajazet Ilderim insolvent; the +descendants of the Prophet bullied by Calmucs and English and whipper-snapper +Frenchmen; the Fountain of Magnificence done up, and obliged to coin pewter! +Think of the poor dear houris in Paradise, how sad they must look as the +arrivals of the Faithful become less and less frequent every day. I can fancy +the place beginning to wear the fatal Vauxhall look of the Seraglio, and which +has pursued me ever since I saw it: the fountains of eternal wine are beginning +to run rather dry, and of a questionable liquor; the ready-roasted-meat trees +may cry, “Come eat me,” every now and then, in a faint voice, without any gravy +in it—but the Faithful begin to doubt about the quality of the victuals. Of +nights you may see the houris sitting sadly under them, darning their faded +muslins: Ali, Omar, and the Imaums are reconciled and have gloomy +consultations: and the Chief of the Faithful himself, the awful camel-driver, +the supernatural husband of Khadijah, sits alone in a tumbledown kiosk, +thinking moodily of the destiny that is impending over him; and of the day when +his gardens of bliss shall be as vacant as the bankrupt Olympus. +</p> + +<p> +All the town of Rhodes has this appearance of decay and ruin, except a few +consuls’ houses planted on the sea-side, here and there, with bright flags +flaunting in the sun; fresh paint; English crockery; shining mahogany, +&c.,—so many emblems of the new prosperity of their trade, while the old +inhabitants were going to rack—the fine Church of St. John, converted into a +mosque, is a ruined church, with a ruined mosque inside; the fortifications are +mouldering away, as much as time will let them. There was considerable bustle +and stir about the little port; but it was the bustle of people who looked for +the most part to be beggars; and I saw no shop in the bazaar that seemed to +have the value of a pedlar’s pack. +</p> + +<p> +I took, by way of guide, a young fellow from Berlin, a journeyman shoemaker, +who had just been making a tour in Syria, and who professed to speak both +Arabic and Turkish quite fluently—which I thought he might have learned when he +was a student at college, before he began his profession of shoemaking; but I +found he only knew about three words of Turkish, which were produced on every +occasion, as I walked under his guidance through the desolate streets of the +noble old town. We went out upon the lines of fortification, through an ancient +gate and guard-house, where once a chapel probably stood, and of which the +roofs were richly carved and gilded. A ragged squad of Turkish soldiers lolled +about the gate now; a couple of boys on a donkey; a grinning slave on a mule; a +pair of women flapping along in yellow papooshes; a basket-maker sitting under +an antique carved portal, and chanting or howling as he plaited his osiers: a +peaceful well of water, at which knights’ chargers had drunk, and at which the +double-boyed donkey was now refreshing himself—would have made a pretty picture +for a sentimental artist. As he sits, and endeavours to make a sketch of this +plaintive little comedy, a shabby dignitary of the island comes clattering by +on a thirty-shilling horse, and two or three of the ragged soldiers leave their +pipes to salute him as he passes under the Gothic archway. +</p> + +<p> +The astonishing brightness and clearness of the sky under which the island +seemed to bask, struck me as surpassing anything I had seen- -not even at +Cadiz, or the Piraeus, had I seen sands so yellow, or water so magnificently +blue. The houses of the people along the shore were but poor tenements, with +humble courtyards and gardens; but every fig-tree was gilded and bright, as if +it were in an Hesperian orchard; the palms, planted here and there, rose with a +sort of halo of light round about them; the creepers on the walls quite dazzled +with the brilliancy of their flowers and leaves; the people lay in the cool +shadows, happy and idle, with handsome solemn faces; nobody seemed to be at +work; they only talked a very little, as if idleness and silence were a +condition of the delightful shining atmosphere in which they lived. +</p> + +<p> +We went down to an old mosque by the sea-shore, with a cluster of ancient domes +hard by it, blazing in the sunshine, and carved all over with names of Allah, +and titles of old pirates and generals who reposed there. The guardian of the +mosque sat in the garden- court, upon a high wooden pulpit, lazily wagging his +body to and fro, and singing the praises of the Prophet gently through his +nose, as the breeze stirred through the trees overhead, and cast chequered and +changing shadows over the paved court, and the little fountains, and the nasal +psalmist on his perch. On one side was the mosque, into which you could see, +with its white walls and cool-matted floor, and quaint carved pulpit and +ornaments, and nobody at prayers. In the middle distance rose up the noble +towers and battlements of the knightly town, with the deep sea-line behind +them. +</p> + +<p> +It really seemed as if everybody was to have a sort of sober cheerfulness, and +must yield to indolence under this charming atmosphere. I went into the +courtyard by the sea-shore (where a few lazy ships were lying, with no one on +board), and found it was the prison of the place. The door was as wide open as +Westminster Hall. Some prisoners, one or two soldiers and functionaries, and +some prisoners’ wives, were lolling under an arcade by a fountain; other +criminals were strolling about here and there, their chains clinking quite +cheerfully; and they and the guards and officials came up chatting quite +friendly together, and gazed languidly over the portfolio, as I was +endeavouring to get the likeness of one or two of these comfortable +malefactors. One old and wrinkled she- criminal, whom I had selected on account +of the peculiar hideousness of her countenance, covered it up with a dirty +cloth, at which there was a general roar of laughter among this good- humoured +auditory of cut-throats, pickpockets, and policemen. The only symptom of a +prison about the place was a door, across which a couple of sentinels were +stretched, yawning; while within lay three freshly-caught pirates—chained by +the leg. They had committed some murders of a very late date, and were awaiting +sentence; but their wives were allowed to communicate freely with them: and it +seemed to me that if half-a-dozen friends would set them flee, and they +themselves had energy enough to move, the sentinels would be a great deal too +lazy to walk after them. +</p> + +<p> +The combined influence of Rhodes and Ramazan, I suppose, had taken possession +of my friend the Schustergesell from Berlin. As soon as he received his fee, he +cut me at once, and went and lay down by a fountain near the port, and ate +grapes out of a dirty pocket- handkerchief. Other Christian idlers lay near +him, dozing, or sprawling, in the boats, or listlessly munching water-melons. +Along the coffee-houses of the quay sat hundreds more, with no better +employment; and the captain of the “Iberia” and his officers, and several of +the passengers in that famous steamship, were in this company, being idle with +all their might. Two or three adventurous young men went off to see the valley +where the dragon was killed; but others, more susceptible of the real influence +of the island, I am sure would not have moved though we had been told that the +Colossus himself was taking a walk half a mile off. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0009"></a> +CHAPTER IX<br/> +THE WHITE SQUALL</h2> + +<p> +On deck, beneath the awning, I dozing lay and yawning; It was the grey of +dawning, Ere yet the sun arose; And above the funnel’s roaring, And the fitful +wind’s deploring, I heard the cabin snoring With universal nose. I could hear +the passengers snorting, I envied their disporting: Vainly I was courting The +pleasure of a doze. +</p> + +<p> +So I lay, and wondered why light Came not, and watched the twilight And the +glimmer of the skylight, That shot across the deck; And the binnacle pale and +steady, And the dull glimpse of the dead-eye, And the sparks in fiery eddy, +That whirled from the chimney neck: In our jovial floating prison There was +sleep from fore to mizen, And never a star had risen The hazy sky to speck. +</p> + +<p> +Strange company we harboured; We’d a hundred Jews to larboard, Unwashed, +uncombed, uubarbered, Jews black, and brown, and grey; With terror it would +seize ye, And make your souls uneasy, To see those Rabbis greasy, Who did +nought but scratch and pray: Their dirty children pucking, Their dirty +saucepans cooking, Their dirty fingers hooking Their swarming fleas away. +</p> + +<p> +To starboard Turks and Greeks were, Whiskered, and brown their cheeks were, +Enormous wide their breeks were, Their pipes did puff alway; Each on his mat +allotted, In silence smoked and squatted, Whilst round their children trotted +In pretty, pleasant play. He can’t but smile who traces The smiles on those +brown faces, And the pretty prattling graces Of those small heathens gay. +</p> + +<p> +And so the hours kept tolling, And through the ocean rolling, Went the brave +“Iberia” bowling Before the break of day - When a SQUALL upon a sudden Came +o’er the waters scudding; And the clouds began to gather, And the sea was +lashed to lather, And the lowering thunder grumbled, And the lightning jumped +and tumbled, And the ship, and all the ocean, Woke up in wild commotion. +</p> + +<p> +Then the wind set up a howling, And the poodle-dog a yowling, And the cocks +began a crowing, And the old cow raised a lowing, As she heard the tempest +blowing; And fowls and geese did cackle, And the cordage and the tackle Began +to shriek and crackle; And the spray dashed o’er the funnels, And down the deck +in runnels; And the rushing water soaks all, From the seamen in the fo’ksal To +the stokers, whose black faces Peer out of their bed-places; And the captain he +was bawling, And the sailors pulling, hauling; And the quarter-deck tarpauling +Was shivered in the squalling; And the passengers awaken, Most pitifully +shaken; And the steward jumps up, and hastens For the necessary basins. +</p> + +<p> +Then the Greeks they groaned and quivered, And they knelt, and moaned, and +shivered, As the plunging waters met them, And splashed and overset them; And +they call in their emergence Upon countless saints and virgins; And their +marrowbones are bended, And they think the world is ended. +</p> + +<p> +And the Turkish women for’ard Were frightened and behorror’d; And, shrieking +and bewildering, The mothers clutched their children; The men sung, “Allah +Illah! Mashallah Bismillah!” +</p> + +<p> +As the warring waters doused them, And splashed them and soused them; And they +called upon the Prophet, And thought but little of it. +</p> + +<p> +Then all the fleas in Jewry Jumped up and bit like fury; And the progeny of +Jacob Did on the main-deck wake up (I wot those greasy Rabbins Would never pay +for cabins); And each man moaned and jabbered in His filthy Jewish gaberdine, +In woe and lamentation, And howling consternation. And the splashing water +drenches Their dirty brats and wenches; And they crawl from bales and benches, +In a hundred thousand stenches. +</p> + +<p> +This was the White Squall famous Which latterly o’ercame us, And which all will +well remember On the 28th September: When a Prussian Captain of Lancers (Those +tight-laced, whiskered prancers) Came on the deck astonished, By that wild +squall admonished, And wondering cried, “Potztausend! Wie ist der Sturm jetzt +brausend!” And looked at Captain Lewis, Who calmly stood and blew his Cigar in +all the bustle, And scorned the tempest’s tussle. And oft we’ve thought +thereafter How he beat the storm to laughter; For well he knew his vessel With +that vain wind could wrestle; And when a wreck we thought her And doomed +ourselves to slaughter, How gaily he fought her, And through the hubbub brought +her, And, as the tempest caught her, Cried, “GEORGE! SOME BRANDY-AND-WATER!” +</p> + +<p> +And when, its force expended, The harmless storm was ended, And, as the sunrise +splendid Came blushing o’er the sea; I thought, as day was breaking, My little +girls were waking, And smiling, and making A prayer at home for me. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0010"></a> +CHAPTER X<br/> +TELMESSUS—BEYROUT</h2> + +<p> +There should have been a poet in our company to describe that charming little +bay of Glaucus, into which we entered on the 26th of September, in the first +steam-boat that ever disturbed its beautiful waters. You can’t put down in +prose that delicious episode of natural poetry; it ought to be done in a +symphony, full of sweet melodies and swelling harmonies; or sung in a strain of +clear crystal iambics, such as Milnes knows how to write. A mere map, drawn in +words, gives the mind no notion of that exquisite nature. What do mountains +become in type, or rivers in Mr. Vizetelly’s best brevier? Here lies the sweet +bay, gleaming peaceful in the rosy sunshine: green islands dip here and there +in its waters: purple mountains swell circling round it; and towards them, +rising from the bay, stretches a rich green plain, fruitful with herbs and +various foliage, in the midst of which the white houses twinkle. I can see a +little minaret, and some spreading palm-trees; but, beyond these, the +description would answer as well for Bantry Bay as for Makri. You could write +so far, nay, much more particularly and grandly, without seeing the place at +all, and after reading Beaufort’s “Caramania,” which gives you not the least +notion of it. +</p> + +<p> +Suppose the great Hydrographer of the Admiralty himself can’t describe it, who +surveyed the place; suppose Mr. Fellowes, who discovered it afterwards—suppose, +I say, Sir John Fellowes, Knt., can’t do it (and I defy any man of imagination +to got an impression of Telmessus from his book)—can you, vain man, hope to +try? The effect of the artist, as I take it, ought to be, to produce upon his +hearer’s mind, by his art, an effect something similar to that produced on his +own by the sight of the natural object. Only music, or the best poetry, can do +this. Keats’s “Ode to the Grecian Urn” is the best description I know of that +sweet old silent ruin of Telmessus. After you have once seen it, the +remembrance remains with you, like a tune from Mozart, which he seems to have +caught out of heaven, and which rings sweet harmony in your ears for ever +after! It’s a benefit for all after life! You have but to shut your eyes, and +think, and recall it, and the delightful vision comes smiling back, to your +order!—the divine air—the delicious little pageant, which nature set before you +on this lucky day. +</p> + +<p> +Here is the entry made in the note-book on the eventful day:- “In the morning +steamed into the bay of Glaucus—landed at Makri— cheerful old desolate +village—theatre by the beautiful sea-shore— great fertility, oleanders—a +palm-tree in the midst of the village, spreading out like a Sultan’s +aigrette—sculptured caverns, or tombs, up the mountain—camels over the bridge.” +</p> + +<p> +Perhaps it is best for a man of fancy to make his own landscape out of these +materials: to group the couched camels under the plane- trees; the little crowd +of wandering ragged heathens come down to the calm water, to behold the nearing +steamer; to fancy a mountain, in the sides of which some scores of tombs are +rudely carved; pillars and porticos, and Doric entablatures. But it is of the +little theatre that he must make the most beautiful picture—a charming little +place of festival, lying out on the shore, and looking over the sweet bay and +the swelling purple islands. No theatre-goer ever looked out on a fairer scene. +It encourages poetry, idleness, delicious sensual reverie. O Jones! friend of +my heart! would you not like to be a white-robed Greek, lolling languidly, on +the cool benches here, and pouring compliments (in the Ionic dialect) into the +rosy ears of Neaera? Instead of Jones, your name should be Ionides; instead of +a silk hat, you should wear a chaplet of roses in your hair: you would not +listen to the choruses they were singing on the stage, for the voice of the +fair one would be whispering a rendezvous for the mesonuktiais horais, and my +Ionides would have no ear for aught beside. Yonder, in the mountain, they would +carve a Doric cave temple, to receive your urn when all was done; and you would +be accompanied thither by a dirge of the surviving Ionidae. The caves of the +dead are empty now, however, and their place knows them not any more among the +festal haunts of the living. But, by way of supplying the choric melodies sung +here in old time, one of our companions mounted on the scene and spouted, +</p> + +<p> +“My name is Norval.” +</p> + +<p> +On the same day we lay to for a while at another ruined theatre, that of +Antiphilos. The Oxford men, fresh with recollections of the little-go, bounded +away up the hill on which it lies to the ruin, measured the steps of the +theatre, and calculated the width of the scene; while others, less active, +watched them with telescopes from the ship’s sides, as they plunged in and out +of the stones and hollows. +</p> + +<p> +Two days after the scene was quite changed. We were out of sight of the +classical country, and lay in St. George’s Bay, behind a huge mountain, upon +which St. George fought the dragon, and rescued the lovely Lady Sabra, the King +of Babylon’s daughter. The Turkish fleet was lying about us, commanded by that +Halil Pasha whose two children the two last Sultans murdered. The crimson flag, +with the star and crescent, floated at the stern of his ship. Our diplomatist +put on his uniform and cordons, and paid his Excellency a visit. He spoke in +rapture, when he returned, of the beauty and order of the ship, and the +urbanity of the infidel Admiral. He sent us bottles of ancient Cyprus wine to +drink: and the captain of Her Majesty’s ship “Trump,” alongside which we were +lying, confirmed that good opinion of the Capitan Pasha which the reception of +the above present led us to entertain, by relating many instances of his +friendliness and hospitalities. Captain G- said the Turkish ships were as well +manned, as well kept, and as well manoeuvred, as any vessels in any service; +and intimated a desire to command a Turkish seventy-four, and a perfect +willingness to fight her against a French ship of the same size. But I heartily +trust he will neither embrace the Mahometan opinions, nor be called upon to +engage any seventy-four whatever. If he do, let us hope he will have his own +men to fight with. If the crew of the “Trump” were all like the crew of the +captain’s boat, they need fear no two hundred and fifty men out of any country, +with any Joinville at their head. We were carried on shore by this boat. For +two years, during which the “Trump” had been lying off Beyrout, none of the men +but these eight had ever set foot on shore. Mustn’t it be a happy life? We were +landed at the busy quay of Beyrout, flanked by the castle that the fighting old +commodore half battered down. +</p> + +<p> +Along the Beyrout quays civilisation flourishes under the flags of the consuls, +which are streaming out over the yellow buildings in the clear air. Hither she +brings from England her produce of marine-stores and woollens, her crockeries, +her portable soups, and her bitter ale. Hither she has brought politeness, and +the last modes from Paris. They were exhibited in the person of a pretty lady, +superintending the great French store, and who, seeing a stranger sketching on +the quay, sent forward a man with a chair to accommodate that artist, and +greeted him with a bow and a smile, such as only can be found in France. Then +she fell to talking with a young French officer with a beard, who was greatly +smitten with her. They were making love just as they do on the Boulevard. An +Arab porter left his bales, and the camel he was unloading, to come and look at +the sketch. Two stumpy flat-faced Turkish soldiers, in red caps and white +undresses, peered over the paper. A noble little Lebanonian girl, with a deep +yellow face, and curly dun- coloured hair, and a blue tattooed chin, and for +all clothing a little ragged shift of blue cloth, stood by like a little +statue, holding her urn, and stared with wondering brown eyes. How +magnificently blue the water was!—how bright the flags and buildings as they +shone above it, and the lines of the rigging tossing in the bay! The white +crests of the blue waves jumped and sparkled like quicksilver; the shadows were +as broad and cool as the lights were brilliant and rosy; the battered old +towers of the commodore looked quite cheerful in the delicious atmosphere; and +the mountains beyond were of an amethyst colour. The French officer and the +lady went on chattering quite happily about love, the last new bonnet, or the +battle of Isly, or the “Juif Errant.” How neatly her gown and sleeves fitted +her pretty little person! We had not seen a woman for a month, except honest +Mrs. Flanigan, the stewardess, and the ladies of our party, and the tips of the +noses of the Constantinople beauties as they passed by leering from their +yakmacs, waddling and plapping in their odious yellow papooshes. +</p> + +<p> +And this day is to be marked with a second white stone, for having given the +lucky writer of the present, occasion to behold a second beauty. This was a +native Syrian damsel, who bore the sweet name of Mariam. So it was she stood as +two of us (I mention the number for fear of scandal) took her picture. +</p> + +<p> +So it was that the good-natured black cook looked behind her young mistress, +with a benevolent grin, that only the admirable Leslie could paint. +</p> + +<p> +Mariam was the sister of the young guide whom we hired to show us through the +town, and to let us be cheated in the purchase of gilt scarfs and +handkerchiefs, which strangers think proper to buy. And before the following +authentic drawing could be made, many were the stratagems the wily artists were +obliged to employ, to subdue the shyness of the little Mariam. In the first +place, she would stand behind the door (from which in the darkness her +beautiful black eyes gleamed out like penny tapers); nor could the entreaties +of her brother and mamma bring her from that hiding-place. In order to +conciliate the latter, we began by making a picture of her too— that is, not of +her, who was an enormous old fat woman in yellow, quivering all over with +strings of pearls, and necklaces of sequins, and other ornaments, the which +descended from her neck, and down her ample stomacher: we did not depict that +big old woman, who would have been frightened at an accurate representation of +her own enormity; but an ideal being, all grace and beauty, dressed in her +costume, and still simpering before me in my sketch- book like a lady in a book +of fashions. +</p> + +<p> +This portrait was shown to the old woman, who handed it over to the black cook, +who, grinning, carried it to little Mariam—and the result was, that the young +creature stepped forward, and submitted; and has come over to Europe as you +see. {2} +</p> + +<p> +A very snug and happy family did this of Mariam’s appear to be. If you could +judge by all the laughter and giggling, by the splendour of the women’s attire, +by the neatness of the little house, prettily decorated with arabesque +paintings, neat mats, and gay carpets, they were a family well to do in the +Beyrout world, and lived with as much comfort as any Europeans. They had one +book; and, on the wall of the principal apartment, a black picture of the +Virgin, whose name is borne by pretty Mariam. +</p> + +<p> +The camels and the soldiers, the bazaars and khans, the fountains and awnings, +which chequer, with such delightful variety of light and shade, the alleys and +markets of an Oriental town, are to be seen in Beyrout in perfection; and an +artist might here employ himself for months with advantage and pleasure. A new +costume was here added to the motley and picturesque assembly of dresses. This +was the dress of the blue-veiled women from the Lebanon, stalking solemnly +through the markets, with huge horns, near a yard high, on their foreheads. For +thousands of years, since the time the Hebrew prophets wrote, these horns have +so been exalted in the Lebanon. +</p> + +<p> +At night Captain Lewis gave a splendid ball and supper to the “Trump.” We had +the “Trump’s” band to perform the music; and a grand sight it was to see the +captain himself enthusiastically leading on the drum. Blue lights and rockets +were burned from the yards of our ship; which festive signals were answered +presently from the “Trump,” and from another English vessel in the harbour. +</p> + +<p> +They must have struck the Capitan Pasha with wonder, for he sent his secretary +on board of us to inquire what the fireworks meant. And the worthy Turk had +scarcely put his foot on the deck, when he found himself seized round the waist +by one of the “Trump’s” officers, and whirling round the deck in a waltz, to +his own amazement, and the huge delight of the company. His face of wonder and +gravity, as he went on twirling, could not have been exceeded by that of a +dancing dervish at Scutari; and the manner in which he managed to enjamber the +waltz excited universal applause. +</p> + +<p> +I forgot whether he accommodated himself to European ways so much further as to +drink champagne at supper-time; to say that he did would be telling tales out +of school, and might interfere with the future advancement of that jolly +dancing Turk. +</p> + +<p> +We made acquaintance with another of the Sultan’s subjects, who, I fear, will +have occasion to doubt of the honour of the English nation, after the foul +treachery with which he was treated. +</p> + +<p> +Among the occupiers of the little bazaar matchboxes, vendors of embroidered +handkerchiefs and other articles of showy Eastern haberdashery, was a +good-looking neat young fellow, who spoke English very fluently, and was +particularly attentive to all the passengers on board our ship. This gentleman +was not only a pocket-handkerchief merchant in the bazaar, but earned a further +livelihood by letting out mules and donkeys; and he kept a small lodging-house, +or inn, for travellers, as we were informed. +</p> + +<p> +No wonder he spoke good English, and was exceedingly polite and well-bred; for +the worthy man had passed some time in England, and in the best society too. +That humble haberdasher at Beyrout had been a lion here, at the very best +houses of the great people, and had actually made his appearance at Windsor, +where he was received as a Syrian Prince, and treated with great hospitality by +Royalty itself. +</p> + +<p> +I don’t know what waggish propensity moved one of the officers of the “Trump” +to say that there was an equerry of His Royal Highness the Prince on board, and +to point me out as the dignified personage in question. So the Syrian Prince +was introduced to the Royal equerry, and a great many compliments passed +between us. I even had the audacity to state that on my very last interview +with my Royal master, His Royal Highness had said, “Colonel Titmarsh, when you +go to Beyrout, you will make special inquiries regarding my interesting friend +Cogia Hassan.” +</p> + +<p> +Poor Cogia Hassan (I forget whether that was his name, but it is as good as +another) was overpowered with this Royal message; and we had an intimate +conversation together, at which the waggish officer of the “Trump” assisted +with the greatest glee. +</p> + +<p> +But see the consequences of deceit! The next day, as we were getting under way, +who should come on board but my friend the Syrian Prince, most eager for a last +interview with the Windsor equerry; and he begged me to carry his protestations +of unalterable fidelity to the gracious consort of Her Majesty. Nor was this +all. Cogia Hassan actually produced a great box of sweetmeats, of which he +begged my Excellency to accept, and a little figure of a doll dressed in the +costume of Lebanon. Then the punishment of imposture began to be felt severely +by me. How to accept the poor devil’s sweetmeats? How to refuse them? And as we +know that one fib leads to another, so I was obliged to support the first +falsehood by another; and putting on a dignified air—“Cogia Hassan,” says I, “I +am surprised you don’t know the habits of the British Court better, and are not +aware that our gracious master solemnly forbids his servants to accept any sort +of backsheesh upon our travels.” +</p> + +<p> +So Prince Cogia Hassan went over the side with his chest of sweetmeats, but +insisted on leaving the doll, which may be worth twopence-halfpenny; of which, +and of the costume of the women of Lebanon, the following is an accurate +likeness:- +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0011"></a> +CHAPTER XI<br/> +A DAY AND NIGHT IN SYRIA</h2> + +<p> +When, after being for five whole weeks at sea, with a general belief that at +the end of a few days the marine malady leaves you for good, you find that a +brisk wind and a heavy rolling swell create exactly the same inward effects +which they occasioned at the very commencement of the voyage—you begin to fancy +that you are unfairly dealt with: and I, for my part, had thought of +complaining to the Company of this atrocious violation of the rules of their +prospectus; but we were perpetually coming to anchor in various ports, at which +intervals of peace and good-humour were restored to us. +</p> + +<p> +On the 3rd of October our cable rushed with a huge rattle into the blue sea +before Jaffa, at a distance of considerably more than a mile off the town, +which lay before us very clear, with the flags of the consuls flaring in the +bright sky and making a cheerful and hospitable show. The houses a great heap +of sun-baked stones, surmounted here and there by minarets and countless little +whitewashed domes; a few date-trees spread out their fan-like heads over these +dull-looking buildings; long sands stretched away on either side, with low +purple hills behind them; we could see specks of camels crawling over these +yellow plains; and those persons who were about to land had the leisure to +behold the sea-spray flashing over the sands, and over a heap of black rocks +which lie before the entry to the town. The swell is very great, the passage +between the rocks narrow, and the danger sometimes considerable. So the guide +began to entertain the ladies and other passengers in the huge country boat +which brought us from the steamer with an agreeable story of a lieutenant and +eight seamen of one of Her Majesty’s ships, who were upset, dashed to pieces, +and drowned upon these rocks, through which two men and two boys, with a very +moderate portion of clothing, each standing and pulling half an oar—there were +but two oars between them, and another by way of rudder—were endeavouring to +guide us. +</p> + +<p> +When the danger of the rocks and surf was passed, came another danger of the +hideous brutes in brown skins and the briefest shirts, who came towards the +boat, straddling through the water with outstretched arms, grinning and yelling +their Arab invitations to mount their shoulders. I think these fellows +frightened the ladies still more than the rocks and the surf; but the poor +creatures were obliged to submit; and, trembling, were accommodated somehow +upon the mahogany backs of these ruffians, carried through the shallows, and +flung up to a ledge before the city gate, where crowds more of dark people were +swarming, howling after their fashion. The gentlemen, meanwhile, were having +arguments about the eternal backsheesh with the roaring Arab boatmen; and I +recall with wonder and delight especially, the curses and screams of one small +and extremely loud-lunged fellow, who expressed discontent at receiving a five, +instead of a six-piastre piece. But how is one to know, without possessing the +language? Both coins are made of a greasy pewtery sort of tin; and I thought +the biggest was the most valuable: but the fellow showed a sense of their +value, and a disposition seemingly to cut any man’s throat who did not +understand it. Men’s throats have been cut for a less difference before now. +</p> + +<p> +Being cast upon the ledge, the first care of our gallantry was to look after +the ladies, who were scared and astonished by the naked savage brutes, who were +shouldering the poor things to and fro; and bearing them through these and a +dark archway, we came into a street crammed with donkeys and their packs and +drivers, and towering camels with leering eyes looking into the second-floor +rooms, and huge splay feet, through which mesdames et mesdemoiselles were to be +conducted. We made a rush at the first open door, and passed comfortably under +the heels of some horses gathered under the arched court, and up a stone +staircase, which turned out to be that of the Russian consul’s house. His +people welcomed us most cordially to his abode, and the ladies and the luggage +(objects of our solicitude) were led up many stairs and across several terraces +to a most comfortable little room, under a dome of its own, where the +representative of Russia sat. Women with brown faces and draggle-tailed coats +and turbans, and wondering eyes, and no stays, and blue beads and gold coins +hanging round their necks, came to gaze, as they passed, upon the fair neat +Englishwomen. Blowsy black cooks puffing over fires and the strangest pots and +pans on the terraces, children paddling about in long striped robes, +interrupted their sports or labours to come and stare; and the consul, in his +cool domed chamber, with a lattice overlooking the sea, with clean mats, and +pictures of the Emperor, the Virgin, and St. George, received the strangers +with smiling courtesies, regaling the ladies with pomegranates and sugar, the +gentlemen with pipes of tobacco, whereof the fragrant tubes were three yards +long. +</p> + +<p> +The Russian amenities concluded, we left the ladies still under the comfortable +cool dome of the Russian consulate, and went to see our own representative. The +streets of the little town are neither agreeable to horse nor foot travellers. +Many of the streets are mere flights of rough steps, leading abruptly into +private houses: you pass under archways and passages numberless; a steep dirty +labyrinth of stone-vaulted stables and sheds occupies the ground- floor of the +habitations; and you pass from flat to flat of the terraces; at various +irregular corners of which, little chambers, with little private domes, are +erected, and the people live seemingly as much upon the terrace as in the room. +</p> + +<p> +We found the English consul in a queer little arched chamber, with a strange +old picture of the King’s arms to decorate one side of it: and here the consul, +a demure old man, dressed in red flowing robes, with a feeble janissary bearing +a shabby tin-mounted staff, or mace, to denote his office, received such of our +nation as came to him for hospitality. He distributed pipes and coffee to all +and every one; he made us a present of his house and all his beds for the +night, and went himself to lie quietly on the terrace; and for all this +hospitality he declined to receive any reward from us, and said he was but +doing his duty in taking us in. This worthy man, I thought, must doubtless be +very well paid by our Government for making such sacrifices; but it appears +that he does not get one single farthing, and that the greater number of our +Levant consuls are paid at a similar rate of easy remuneration. If we have bad +consular agents, have we a right to complain? If the worthy gentlemen cheat +occasionally, can we reasonably be angry? But in travelling through these +countries, English people, who don’t take into consideration the miserable +poverty and scanty resources of their country, and are apt to brag and be proud +of it, have their vanity hurt by seeing the representatives of every nation but +their own well and decently maintained, and feel ashamed at sitting down under +the shabby protection of our mean consular flag. +</p> + +<p> +The active young men of our party had been on shore long before us, and seized +upon all the available horses in the town; but we relied upon a letter from +Halil Pasha, enjoining all governors and pashas to help us in all ways: and +hearing we were the bearers of this document, the cadi and vice-governor of +Jaffa came to wait upon the head of our party; declared that it was his delight +and honour to set eyes upon us; that he would do everything in the world to +serve us; that there were no horses, unluckily, but he would send and get some +in three hours; and so left us with a world of grinning bows and many choice +compliments from one side to the other, which came to each filtered through an +obsequious interpreter. But hours passed, and the clatter of horses’ hoofs was +not heard. We had our dinner of eggs and flaps of bread, and the sunset gun +fired: we had our pipes and coffee again, and the night fell. Is this man +throwing dirt upon us? we began to think. Is he laughing at our beards, and are +our mothers’ graves ill-treated by this smiling swindling cadi? We determined +to go and seek in his own den this shuffling dispenser of infidel justice. This +time we would be no more bamboozled by compliments; but we would use the +language of stern expostulation, and, being roused, would let the rascal hear +the roar of the indignant British lion; so we rose up in our wrath. The poor +consul got a lamp for us with a bit of wax-candle, such as I wonder his means +could afford; the shabby janissary marched ahead with his tin mace; the two +laquais-de-place, that two of our company had hired, stepped forward, each with +an old sabre, and we went clattering and stumbling down the streets of the +town, in order to seize upon this cadi in his own divan. I was glad, for my +part (though outwardly majestic and indignant in demeanour), that the horses +had not come, and that we had a chance of seeing this little queer glimpse of +Oriental life, which the magistrate’s faithlessness procured for us. +</p> + +<p> +As piety forbids the Turks to eat during the weary daylight hours of the +Ramazan, they spend their time profitably in sleeping until the welcome sunset, +when the town wakens: all the lanterns are lighted up; all the pipes begin to +puff, and the narghiles to bubble; all the sour-milk-and-sherbet-men begin to +yell out the excellence of their wares; all the frying-pans in the little dirty +cookshops begin to friz, and the pots to send forth a steam: and through this +dingy, ragged, bustling, beggarly, cheerful scene, we began now to march +towards the Bow Street of Jaffa. We bustled through a crowded narrow archway +which led to the cadi’s police- office, entered the little room, atrociously +perfumed with musk, and passing by the rail-board, where the common sort stood, +mounted the stage upon which his worship and friends sat, and squatted down on +the divans in stern and silent dignity. His honour ordered us coffee, his +countenance evidently showing considerable alarm. A black slave, whose duty +seemed to be to prepare this beverage in a side-room with a furnace, prepared +for each of us about a teaspoonful of the liquor: his worship’s clerk, I +presume, a tall Turk of a noble aspect, presented it to us; and having lapped +up the little modicum of drink, the British lion began to speak. +</p> + +<p> +All the other travellers (said the lion with perfect reason) have good horses +and are gone; the Russians have got horses, the Spaniards have horses, the +English have horses, but we, we vizirs in our country, coming with letters of +Halil Pasha, are laughed at, spit upon! Are Halil Pasha’s letters dirt, that +you attend to them in this way? Are British lions dogs that you treat them +so?—and so on. This speech with many variations was made on our side for a +quarter of an hour; and we finally swore that unless the horses were +forthcoming we would write to Halil Pasha the next morning, and to His +Excellency the English Minister at the Sublime Porte. Then you should have +heard the chorus of Turks in reply: a dozen voices rose up from the divan, +shouting, screaming, ejaculating, expectorating (the Arabic spoken language +seems to require a great employment of the two latter oratorical methods), and +uttering what the meek interpreter did not translate to us, but what I dare say +were by no means complimentary phrases towards us and our nation. Finally, the +palaver concluded by the cadi declaring that by the will of Heaven horses +should be forthcoming at three o’clock in the morning; and that if not, why, +then, we might write to Halil Pasha. +</p> + +<p> +This posed us, and we rose up and haughtily took leave. I should like to know +that fellow’s real opinion of us lions very much: and especially to have had +the translation of the speeches of a huge- breeched turbaned roaring infidel, +who looked and spoke as if he would have liked to fling us all into the sea, +which was hoarsely murmuring under our windows an accompaniment to the concert +within. +</p> + +<p> +We then marched through the bazaars, that were lofty and grim, and pretty full +of people. In a desolate broken building, some hundreds of children were +playing and singing; in many corners sat parties over their water-pipes, one of +whom every now and then would begin twanging out a most queer chant; others +there were playing at casino—a crowd squatted around the squalling gamblers, +and talking and looking on with eager interest. In one place of the bazaar we +found a hundred people at least listening to a story- teller who delivered his +tale with excellent action, voice, and volubility: in another they were playing +a sort of thimble-rig with coffee-cups, all intent upon the game, and the +player himself very wild lest one of our party, who had discovered where the +pea lay, should tell the company. The devotion and energy with which all these +pastimes were pursued, struck me as much as anything. These people have been +playing thimble-rig and casino; that story- teller has been shouting his tale +of Antar for forty years; and they are just as happy with this amusement now as +when first they tried it. Is there no ennui in the Eastern countries, and are +blue-devils not allowed to go abroad there? +</p> + +<p> +From the bazaars we went to see the house of Mustapha, said to be the best +house and the greatest man of Jaffa. But the great man had absconded suddenly, +and had fled into Egypt. The Sultan had made a demand upon him for sixteen +thousand purses, 80,000l.— Mustapha retired—the Sultan pounced down upon his +house, and his goods, his horses and his mules. His harem was desolate. Mr. +Milnes could have written six affecting poems, had he been with us, on the dark +loneliness of that violated sanctuary. We passed from hall to hall, terrace to +terrace—a few fellows were slumbering on the naked floors, and scarce turned as +we went by them. We entered Mustapha’s particular divan—there was the raised +floor, but no bearded friends squatting away the night of Ramazan; there was +the little coffee furnace, but where was the slave and the coffee and the +glowing embers of the pipes? Mustapha’s favourite passages from the Koran were +still painted up on the walls, but nobody was the wiser for them. We walked +over a sleeping negro, and opened the windows which looked into his gardens. +The horses and donkeys, the camels and mules were picketed there below, but +where is the said Mustapha? From the frying-pan of the Porte, has he not fallen +into the fire of Mehemet Ali? And which is best, to broil or to fry? If it be +but to read the “Arabian Nights” again on getting home, it is good to have made +this little voyage and seen these strange places and faces. +</p> + +<p> +Then we went out through the arched lowering gateway of the town into the plain +beyond, and that was another famous and brilliant scene of the “Arabian +Nights.” The heaven shone with a marvellous brilliancy—the plain disappeared +far in the haze—the towers and battlements of the town rose black against the +sky—old outlandish trees rose up here and there—clumps of camels were couched +in the rare herbage—dogs were baying about—groups of men lay sleeping under +their haicks round about—round about the tall gates many lights were +twinkling—and they brought us water-pipes and sherbet- -and we wondered to +think that London was only three weeks off. +</p> + +<p> +Then came the night at the consul’s. The poor demure old gentleman brought out +his mattresses; and the ladies sleeping round on the divans, we lay down quite +happy; and I for my part intended to make as delightful dreams as Alnaschar; +but—lo, the delicate mosquito sounded his horn: the active flea jumped up, and +came to feast on Christian flesh (the Eastern flea bites more bitterly than the +most savage bug in Christendom), and the bug—oh, the accursed! Why was he made? +What duty has that infamous ruffian to perform in the world, save to make +people wretched? Only Bulwer in his most pathetic style could describe the +miseries of that night—the moaning, the groaning, the cursing, the tumbling, +the blistering, the infamous despair and degradation! I heard all the cocks in +Jaffa crow; the children crying, and the mothers hushing them; the donkeys +braying fitfully in the moonlight; at last I heard the clatter of hoofs below, +and the hailing of men. It was three o’clock, the horses were actually come; +nay, there were camels likewise; asses and mules, pack-saddles and drivers, all +bustling together under the moonlight in the cheerful street—and the first +night in Syria was over. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0012"></a> +CHAPTER XII<br/> +FROM JAFFA TO JERUSALEM</h2> + +<p> +It took an hour or more to get our little caravan into marching order, to +accommodate all the packs to the horses, the horses to the riders; to see the +ladies comfortably placed in their litter, with a sleek and large black mule +fore and aft, a groom to each mule, and a tall and exceedingly good-natured and +mahogany-coloured infidel to walk by the side of the carriage, to balance it as +it swayed to and fro, and to offer his back as a step to the inmates whenever +they were minded to ascend or alight. These three fellows, fasting through the +Ramazan, and over as rough a road, for the greater part, as ever shook mortal +bones, performed their fourteen hours’ walk of near forty miles with the most +admirable courage, alacrity, and good-humour. They once or twice drank water on +the march, and so far infringed the rule; but they refused all bread or edible +refreshment offered to them, and tugged on with an energy that the best camel, +and I am sure the best Christian, might envy. What a lesson of good-humoured +endurance it was to certain Pall Mall Sardanapaluses, who grumble if club sofa +cushions are not soft enough! +</p> + +<p> +If I could write sonnets at leisure, I would like to chronicle in fourteen +lines my sensations on finding myself on a high Turkish saddle, with a pair of +fire-shovel stirrups and worsted reins, red padded saddle-cloth, and +innumerable tags, fringes, glass-beads, ends of rope, to decorate the harness +of the horse, the gallant steed on which I was about to gallop into Syrian +life. What a figure we cut in the moonlight, and how they would have stared in +the Strand! Ay, or in Leicestershire, where I warrant such a horse and rider +are not often visible! The shovel stirrups are deucedly short; the clumsy +leathers cut the shins of some equestrians abominably; you sit over your horse +as it were on a tower, from which the descent would be very easy, but for the +big peak of the saddle. A good way for the inexperienced is to put a stick or +umbrella across the saddle peak again, so that it is next to impossible to go +over your horse’s neck. I found this a vast comfort in going down the hills, +and recommend it conscientiously to other dear simple brethren of the city. +</p> + +<p> +Peaceful men, we did not ornament our girdles with pistols, yataghans, &c., +such as some pilgrims appeared to bristle all over with; and as a lesson to +such rash people, a story may be told which was narrated to us at Jerusalem, +and carries a wholesome moral. The Honourable Hoggin Armer, who was lately +travelling in the East, wore about his stomach two brace of pistols, of such +exquisite finish and make, that a Sheikh, in the Jericho country, robbed him +merely for the sake of the pistols. I don’t know whether he has told the story +to his friends at home. +</p> + +<p> +Another story about Sheikhs may here be told a propos. That celebrated Irish +Peer, Lord Oldgent (who was distinguished in the Buckinghamshire Dragoons), +having paid a sort of black mail to the Sheikh of Jericho country, was suddenly +set upon by another Sheikh, who claimed to be the real Jerichonian governor; +and these twins quarrelled over the body of Lord Oldgent, as the widows for the +innocent baby before Solomon. There was enough for both—but these digressions +are interminable. +</p> + +<p> +The party got under way at near four o’clock: the ladies in the litter, the +French femme-de-chambre manfully caracoling on a grey horse; the cavaliers, +like your humble servant, on their high saddles; the domestics, flunkeys, +guides, and grooms, on all sorts of animals,—some fourteen in all. Add to +these, two most grave and stately Arabs in white beards, white turbans, white +haicks and raiments; sabres curling round their military thighs, and immense +long guns at their backs. More venerable warriors I never saw; they went by the +side of the litter soberly prancing. When we emerged from the steep clattering +streets of the city into the grey plains, lighted by the moon and starlight, +these militaries rode onward, leading the way through the huge avenues of +strange diabolical-looking prickly pears (plants that look as if they had grown +in Tartarus), by which the first mile or two of route from the city is bounded; +and as the dawn arose before us, exhibiting first a streak of grey, then of +green, then of red in the sky, it was fine to see these martial figures defined +against the rising light. The sight of that little cavalcade, and of the nature +around it, will always remain with me, I think, as one of the freshest and most +delightful sensations I have enjoyed since the day I first saw Calais pier. It +was full day when they gave their horses a drink at a large pretty Oriental +fountain, and then presently we entered the open plain—the famous plain of +Sharon—so fruitful in roses once, now hardly cultivated, but always beautiful +and noble. +</p> + +<p> +Here presently, in the distance, we saw another cavalcade pricking over the +plain. Our two white warriors spread to the right and left, and galloped to +reconnoitre. We, too, put our steeds to the canter, and handling our umbrellas +as Richard did his lance against Saladin, went undaunted to challenge this +caravan. The fact is, we could distinguish that it was formed of the party of +our pious friends the Poles, and we hailed them with cheerful shouting, and +presently the two caravans joined company, and scoured the plain at the rate of +near four miles per hour. The horse-master, a courier of this company, rode +three miles for our one. He was a broken- nosed Arab, with pistols, a sabre, a +fusee, a yellow Damascus cloth flapping over his head, and his nose ornamented +with diachylon. He rode a hog-necked grey Arab, bristling over with harness, +and jumped, and whirled, and reared, and halted, to the admiration of all. +</p> + +<p> +Scarce had the diachylonian Arab finished his evolutions, when lo! yet another +cloud of dust was seen, and another party of armed and glittering horsemen +appeared. They, too, were led by an Arab, who was followed by two janissaries, +with silver maces shining in the sun. ’Twas the party of the new American +Consul-General of Syria and Jerusalem, hastening to that city, with the +inferior consuls of Ramleh and Jaffa to escort him. He expects to see the +Millennium in three years, and has accepted the office of consul at Jerusalem, +so as to be on the spot in readiness. +</p> + +<p> +When the diachylon Arab saw the American Arab, he straightway galloped his +steed towards him, took his pipe, which he delivered at his adversary in guise +of a jereed, and galloped round and round, and in and out, and there and back +again, as in a play of war. The American replied in a similar playful +ferocity—the two warriors made a little tournament for us there on the plains +before Jaffa, in the which diachylon, being a little worsted, challenged his +adversary to a race, and fled away on his grey, the American following on his +bay. Here poor sticking-plaster was again worsted, the Yankee contemptuously +riding round him, and then declining further exercise. +</p> + +<p> +What more could mortal man want? A troop of knights and paladins could have +done no more. In no page of Walter Scott have I read a scene more fair and +sparkling. The sober warriors of our escort did not join in the gambols of the +young men. There they rode soberly, in their white turbans, by their ladies’ +litter, their long guns rising up behind them. +</p> + +<p> +There was no lack of company along the road: donkeys numberless, camels by twos +and threes; now a mule-driver, trudging along the road, chanting a most queer +melody; now a lady, in white veil, black mask, and yellow papooshes, bestriding +her ass, and followed by her husband,—met us on the way; and most people gave a +salutation. Presently we saw Ramleh, in a smoking mist, on the plain before us, +flanked to the right by a tall lonely tower, that might have held the bells of +some moutier of Caen or Evreux. As we entered, about three hours and a half +after starting, among the white domes and stone houses of the little town, we +passed the place of tombs. Two women were sitting on one of them,—the one +bending her head towards the stone, and rocking to and fro, and moaning out a +very sweet pitiful lamentation. The American consul invited us to breakfast at +the house of his subaltern, the hospitable one-eyed Armenian, who represents +the United States at Jaffa. The stars and stripes were flaunting over his +terraces, to which we ascended, leaving our horses to the care of a multitude +of roaring ragged Arabs beneath, who took charge of and fed the animals, though +I can’t say in the least why; but, in the same way as getting off my horse on +entering Jerusalem, I gave the rein into the hand of the first person near me, +and have never heard of the worthy brute since. At the American consul’s we +were served first with rice soup in pishpash, flavoured with cinnamon and +spice; then with boiled mutton, then with stewed ditto and tomatoes; then with +fowls swimming in grease; then with brown ragouts belaboured with onions; then +with a smoking pilaff of rice: several of which dishes I can pronounce to be of +excellent material and flavour. When the gentry had concluded this repast, it +was handed to a side table, where the commonalty speedily discussed it. We left +them licking their fingers as we hastened away upon the second part of the +ride. +</p> + +<p> +And as we quitted Ramleh, the scenery lost that sweet and peaceful look which +characterises the pretty plain we had traversed; and the sun, too, rising in +the heaven, dissipated all those fresh beautiful tints in which God’s world is +clothed of early morning, and which city people have so seldom the chance of +beholding. The plain over which we rode looked yellow and gloomy; the +cultivation little or none; the land across the roadside fringed, for the most +part, with straggling wild-carrot plants; a patch of green only here and there. +We passed several herds of lean, small, well- conditioned cattle: many flocks +of black goats, tended now and then by a ragged negro shepherd, his long gun +slung over his back, his hand over his eyes to shade them as he stared at our +little cavalcade. Most of the half-naked countryfolks we met had this dismal +appendage to Eastern rustic life; and the weapon could hardly be one of mere +defence, for, beyond the faded skull-cap, or tattered coat of blue or dirty +white, the brawny, brown-chested, solemn-looking fellows had nothing seemingly +to guard. As before, there was no lack of travellers on the road: more donkeys +trotted by, looking sleek and strong; camels singly and by pairs, laden with a +little humble ragged merchandise, on their way between the two towns. About +noon we halted eagerly at a short distance from an Arab village and well, where +all were glad of a drink of fresh water. A village of beavers, or a colony of +ants, make habitations not unlike these dismal huts piled together on the plain +here. There were no single huts along the whole line of road; poor and wretched +as they are, the Fellahs huddle all together for protection from the other +thieves their neighbours. The government (which we restored to them) has no +power to protect them, and is only strong enough to rob them. The women, with +their long blue gowns and ragged veils, came to and fro with pitchers on their +heads. Rebecca had such an one when she brought drink to the lieutenant of +Abraham. The boys came staring round, bawling after us with their fathers for +the inevitable backsheesh. The village dogs barked round the flocks, as they +were driven to water or pasture. +</p> + +<p> +We saw a gloomy, not very lofty-looking ridge of hills in front of us; the +highest of which the guide pointing out to us, told us that from it we should +see Jerusalem. It looked very near, and we all set up a trot of enthusiasm to +get into this hill country. +</p> + +<p> +But that burst of enthusiasm (it may have carried us nearly a quarter of a mile +in three minutes) was soon destined to be checked by the disagreeable nature of +the country we had to traverse. Before we got to the real mountain district, we +were in a manner prepared for it, by the mounting and descent of several lonely +outlying hills, up and down which our rough stony track wound. Then we entered +the hill district, and our path lay through the clattering bed of an ancient +stream, whose brawling waters have rolled away into the past, along with the +fierce and turbulent race who once inhabited these savage hills. There may have +been cultivation here two thousand years ago. The mountains, or huge stony +mounds environing this rough path, have level ridges all the way up to their +summits; on these parallel ledges there is still some verdure and soil: when +water flowed here, and the country was thronged with that extraordinary +population, which, according to the Sacred Histories, was crowded into the +region, these mountain steps may have been gardens and vineyards, such as we +see now thriving along the hills of the Rhine. Now the district is quite +deserted, and you ride among what seem to be so many petrified waterfalls. We +saw no animals moving among the stony brakes; scarcely even a dozen little +birds in the whole course of the ride. The sparrows are all at Jerusalem, among +the housetops, where their ceaseless chirping and twittering forms the most +cheerful sound of the place. +</p> + +<p> +The company of Poles, the company of Oxford men, and the little American army, +travelled too quick for our caravan, which was made to follow the slow progress +of the ladies’ litter, and we had to make the journey through the mountains in +a very small number. Not one of our party had a single weapon more dreadful +than an umbrella: and a couple of Arabs, wickedly inclined, might have brought +us all to the halt, and rifled every carpet-bag and pocket belonging to us. Nor +can I say that we journeyed without certain qualms of fear. When swarthy +fellows, with girdles full of pistols and yataghans, passed us without +unslinging their long guns—when scowling camel-riders, with awful long bending +lances, decorated with tufts of rags, or savage plumes of scarlet feathers, +went by without molestation—I think we were rather glad that they did not stop +and parley: for, after all, a British lion with an umbrella is no match for an +Arab with his infernal long gun. What, too, would have become of our women? So +we tried to think that it was entirely out of anxiety for them that we were +inclined to push on. +</p> + +<p> +There is a shady resting-place and village in the midst of the mountain +district where the travellers are accustomed to halt for an hour’s repose and +refreshment; and the other caravans were just quitting this spot, having +enjoyed its cool shades and waters, when we came up. Should we stop? Regard for +the ladies (of course no other earthly consideration) made us say, “No!” What +admirable self-denial and chivalrous devotion! So our poor devils of mules and +horses got no rest and no water, our panting litter-men no breathing time, and +we staggered desperately after the procession ahead of us. It wound up the +mountain in front of us: the Poles with their guns and attendants, the American +with his janissaries; fifty or sixty all riding slowly like the procession in +“Bluebeard.” +</p> + +<p> +But alas, they headed us very soon; when we got up the weary hill they were all +out of sight. Perhaps thoughts of Fleet Street did cross the minds of some of +us then, and a vague desire to see a few policemen. The district now seemed +peopled, and with an ugly race. Savage personages peered at us out of huts, and +grim holes in the rocks. The mules began to loiter most abominably—water the +muleteers must have—and, behold, we came to a pleasant-looking village of trees +standing on a hill; children were shaking figs from the trees—women were going +about—before us was the mosque of a holy man—the village, looking like a +collection of little forts, rose up on the hill to our right, with a long view +of the fields and gardens stretching from it, and camels arriving with their +burdens. Here we must stop; Paolo, the chief servant, knew the Sheikh of the +village—he very good man—give him water and supper- -water very good here—in +fact we began to think of the propriety of halting here for the night, and +making our entry into Jerusalem on the next day. +</p> + +<p> +A man on a handsome horse dressed in red came prancing up to us, looking hard +at the ladies in the litter, and passed away. Then two others sauntered up, one +handsome, and dressed in red too, and he stared into the litter without +ceremony, began to play with a little dog that lay there, asked if we were +Inglees, and was answered by me in the affirmative. Paolo had brought the +water, the most delicious draught in the world. The gentlefolks had had some, +the poor muleteers were longing for it. The French maid, the courageous +Victoire (never since the days of Joan of Arc has there surely been a more +gallant and virtuous female of France) refused the drink; when suddenly a +servant of the party scampers up to his master and says: “Abou Gosh says the +ladies must get out and show themselves to the women of the village!” +</p> + +<p> +It was Abou Gosh himself, the redoubted robber Sheikh about whom we had been +laughing and crying “Wolf!” all day. Never was seen such a skurry! “March!” was +the instant order given. When Victoire heard who it was and the message, you +should have seen how she changed countenance; trembling for her virtue in the +ferocious clutches of a Gosh. “Un verre d’eau pour l’amour de Dieu!” gasped +she, and was ready to faint on her saddle. “Ne buvez plus, Victoire!” screamed +a little fellow of our party. “Push on, push on!” cried one and all. “What’s +the matter?” exclaimed the ladies in the litter, as they saw themselves +suddenly jogging on again. But we took care not to tell them what had been the +designs of the redoubtable Abou Gosh. Away then we went—Victoire was saved—and +her mistresses rescued from dangers they knew not of, until they were a long +way out of the village. +</p> + +<p> +Did he intend insult or good will? Did Victoire escape the odious chance of +becoming Madame Abou Gosh? Or did the mountain chief simply propose to be +hospitable after his fashion? I think the latter was his desire; if the former +had been his wish, a half- dozen of his long guns could have been up with us in +a minute, and had all our party at their mercy. But now, for the sake of the +mere excitement, the incident was, I am sorry to say, rather a pleasant one +than otherwise: especially for a traveller who is in the happy condition of +being able to sing before robbers, as is the case with the writer of the +present. +</p> + +<p> +A little way out of the land of Goshen we came upon a long stretch of gardens +and vineyards, slanting towards the setting sun, which illuminated numberless +golden clusters of the most delicious grapes, of which we stopped and partook. +Such grapes were never before tasted; water so fresh as that which a countryman +fetched for us from a well never sluiced parched throats before. It was the +ride, the sun, and above all Abou Gosh, who made that refreshment so sweet, and +hereby I offer him my best thanks. Presently, in the midst of a most diabolical +ravine, down which our horses went sliding, we heard the evening gun: it was +fired from Jerusalem. The twilight is brief in this country, and in a few +minutes the landscape was grey round about us, and the sky lighted up by a +hundred thousand stars, which made the night beautiful. +</p> + +<p> +Under this superb canopy we rode for a couple of hours to our journey’s end. +The mountains round about us dark, lonely, and sad; the landscape as we saw it +at night (it is not more cheerful in the daytime), the most solemn and forlorn +I have ever seen. The feelings of almost terror with which, riding through the +night, we approached this awful place, the centre of the world’s past and +future history, have no need to be noted down here. The recollection of those +sensations must remain with a man as long as his memory lasts; and he should +think of them as often, perhaps, as he should talk of them little. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0013"></a> +CHAPTER XIII<br/> +JERUSALEM</h2> + +<p> +The ladies of our party found excellent quarters in readiness for them at the +Greek convent in the city; where airy rooms, and plentiful meals, and wines and +sweet-meats delicate and abundant, were provided to cheer them after the +fatigues of their journey. I don’t know whether the worthy fathers of the +convent share in the good things which they lavish on their guests; but they +look as if they do. Those whom we saw bore every sign of easy conscience and +good living; there were a pair of strong, rosy, greasy, lazy lay- brothers, +dawdling in the sun on the convent terrace, or peering over the parapet into +the street below, whose looks gave one a notion of anything but asceticism. +</p> + +<p> +In the principal room of the strangers’ house (the lay traveller is not +admitted to dwell in the sacred interior of the convent), and over the +building, the Russian double-headed eagle is displayed. The place is under the +patronage of the Emperor Nicholas; an Imperial Prince has stayed in these +rooms; the Russian consul performs a great part in the city; and a considerable +annual stipend is given by the Emperor towards the maintenance of the great +establishment in Jerusalem. The Great Chapel of the Church of the Holy +Sepulchre is by far the richest, in point of furniture, of all the places of +worship under that roof. We were in Russia, when we came to visit our friends +here; under the protection of the Father of the Church and the Imperial Eagle! +This butcher and tyrant, who sits on his throne only through the crime of those +who held it before him—every step in whose pedigree is stained by some horrible +mark of murder, parricide, adultery—this padded and whiskered pontiff—who rules +in his jack-boots over a system of spies and soldiers, of deceit, ignorance, +dissoluteness, and brute force, such as surely the history of the world never +told of before—has a tender interest in the welfare of his spiritual children: +in the Eastern Church ranks after Divinity, and is worshipped by millions of +men. A pious exemplar of Christianity truly! and of the condition to which its +union with politics has brought it! Think of the rank to which he pretends, and +gravely believes that he possesses, no doubt!—think of those who assumed the +same ultra-sacred character before him!—and then of the Bible and the Founder +of the Religion, of which the Emperor assumes to be the chief priest and +defender! +</p> + +<p> +We had some Poles of our party; but these poor fellows went to the Latin +convent, declining to worship after the Emperor’s fashion. The next night after +our arrival, two of them passed in the Sepulchre. There we saw them, more than +once on subsequent visits, kneeling in the Latin Church before the pictures, or +marching solemnly with candles in processions, or lying flat on the stones, or +passionately kissing the spots which their traditions have consecrated as the +authentic places of the Saviour’s sufferings. More honest or more civilised, or +from opposition, the Latin fathers have long given up and disowned the +disgusting mummery of the Eastern Fire—which lie the Greeks continue annually +to tell. +</p> + +<p> +Their travellers’ house and convent, though large and commodious, are of a much +poorer and shabbier condition than those of the Greeks. Both make believe not +to take money; but the traveller is expected to pay in each. The Latin fathers +enlarge their means by a little harmless trade in beads and crosses, and +mother-of-pearl shells, on which figures of saints are engraved; and which they +purchase from the manufacturers, and vend at a small profit. The English, until +of late, used to be quartered in these sham inns; but last year two or three +Maltese took houses for the reception of tourists, who can now be accommodated +with cleanly and comfortable board, at a rate not too heavy for most pockets. +</p> + +<p> +To one of these we went very gladly; giving our horses the bridle at the door, +which went off of their own will to their stables, through the dark +inextricable labyrinths of streets, archways, and alleys, which we had threaded +after leaving the main street from the Jaffa Gate. There, there was still some +life. Numbers of persons were collected at their doors, or smoking before the +dingy coffee-houses, where singing and story-telling were going on; but out of +this great street everything was silent, and no sign of a light from the +windows of the low houses which we passed. +</p> + +<p> +We ascended from a lower floor up to a terrace, on which were several little +domed chambers, or pavilions. From this terrace, whence we looked in the +morning, a great part of the city spread before us:- white domes upon domes, +and terraces of the same character as our own. Here and there, from among these +whitewashed mounds round about, a minaret rose, or a rare date-tree; but the +chief part of the vegetation near was that odious tree the prickly pear,—one +huge green wart growing out of another, armed with spikes, as inhospitable as +the aloe, without shelter or beauty. To the right the Mosque of Omar rose; the +rising sun behind it. Yonder steep tortuous lane before us, flanked by ruined +walls on either side, has borne, time out of mind, the title of Via Dolorosa; +and tradition has fixed the spots where the Saviour rested, bearing his cross +to Calvary. But of the mountain, rising immediately in front of us, a few grey +olive-trees speckling the yellow side here and there, there can be no question. +That is the Mount of Olives. Bethany lies beyond it. The most sacred eyes that +ever looked on this world have gazed on those ridges: it was there He used to +walk and teach. With shame and humility one looks towards the spot where that +inexpressible Love and Benevolence lived and breathed; where the great yearning +heart of the Saviour interceded for all our race; and whence the bigots and +traitors of his day led Him away to kill Him! +</p> + +<p> +That company of Jews whom we had brought with us from Constantinople, and who +had cursed every delay on the route, not from impatience to view the Holy City, +but from rage at being obliged to purchase dear provisions for their +maintenance on ship- board, made what bargains they best could at Jaffa, and +journeyed to the Valley of Jehoshaphat at the cheapest rate. We saw the tall +form of the old Polish Patriarch, venerable in filth, stalking among the +stinking ruins of the Jewish quarter. The sly old Rabbi, in the greasy folding +hat, who would not pay to shelter his children from the storm off Beyrout, +greeted us in the bazaars; the younger Rabbis were furbished up with some +smartness. We met them on Sunday at the kind of promenade by the walls of the +Bethlehem Gate; they were in company of some red-bearded co-religionists, +smartly attired in Eastern raiment; but their voice was the voice of the Jews +of Berlin, and of course as we passed they were talking about so many hundert +thaler. You may track one of the people, and be sure to hear mention of that +silver calf that they worship. +</p> + +<p> +The English mission has been very unsuccessful with these religionists. I don’t +believe the Episcopal apparatus—the chaplains, and the colleges, and the +beadles—have succeeded in converting a dozen of them; and a sort of martyrdom +is in store for the luckless Hebrews at Jerusalem who shall secede from their +faith. Their old community spurn them with horror; and I heard of the case of +one unfortunate man, whose wife, in spite of her husband’s change of creed, +being resolved, like a true woman, to cleave to him, was spirited away from him +in his absence; was kept in privacy in the city, in spite of all exertions of +the mission, of the consul and the bishop, and the chaplains and the beadles; +was passed away from Jerusalem to Beyrout, and thence to Constantinople; and +from Constantinople was whisked off into the Russian territories, where she +still pines after her husband. May that unhappy convert find consolation away +from her. I could not help thinking, as my informant, an excellent and +accomplished gentleman of the mission, told me the story, that the Jews had +done only what the Christians do under the same circumstances. The woman was +the daughter of a most learned Rabbi, as I gathered. Suppose the daughter of +the Rabbi of Exeter, or Canterbury, were to marry a man who turned Jew, would +not her Right Reverend Father be justified in taking her out of the power of a +person likely to hurl her soul to perdition? These poor converts should surely +be sent away to England out of the way of persecution. We could not but feel a +pity for them, as they sat there on their benches in the church conspicuous; +and thought of the scorn and contumely which attended them without, as they +passed, in their European dresses and shaven beards, among their grisly, +scowling, long-robed countrymen. +</p> + +<p> +As elsewhere in the towns I have seen, the Ghetto of Jerusalem is pre-eminent +in filth. The people are gathered round about the dung-gate of the city. Of a +Friday you may hear their wailings and lamentations for the lost glories of +their city. I think the Valley of Jehoshaphat is the most ghastly sight I have +seen in the world. From all quarters they come hither to bury their dead. When +his time is come yonder hoary old miser, with whom we made our voyage, will lay +his carcase to rest here. To do that, and to claw together money, has been the +purpose of that strange long life. +</p> + +<p> +We brought with us one of the gentlemen of the mission, a Hebrew convert, the +Rev. Mr. E-; and lest I should be supposed to speak with disrespect above of +any of the converts of the Hebrew faith, let me mention this gentleman as the +only one whom I had the fortune to meet on terms of intimacy. I never saw a man +whose outward conduct was more touching, whose sincerity was more evident, and +whose religious feeling seemed more deep, real, and reasonable. +</p> + +<p> +Only a few feet off, the walls of the Anglican Church of Jerusalem rise up from +their foundations on a picturesque open spot, in front of the Bethlehem Gate. +The English Bishop has his church hard by: and near it is the house where the +Christians of our denomination assemble and worship. +</p> + +<p> +There seem to be polyglot services here. I saw books of prayer, or Scripture, +in Hebrew, Greek, and German: in which latter language Dr. Alexander preaches +every Sunday. A gentleman who sat near me at church used all these books +indifferently; reading the first lesson from the Hebrew book, and the second +from the Greek. Here we all assembled on the Sunday after our arrival: it was +affecting to hear the music and language of our country sounding in this +distant place; to have the decent and manly ceremonial of our service; the +prayers delivered in that noble language. Even that stout anti-prelatist, the +American consul, who has left his house and fortune in America in order to +witness the coming of the Millennium, who believes it to be so near that he has +brought a dove with him from his native land (which bird he solemnly informed +us was to survive the expected Advent), was affected by the good old words and +service. He swayed about and moaned in his place at various passages; during +the sermon he gave especial marks of sympathy and approbation. I never heard +the service more excellently and impressively read than by the Bishop’s +chaplain, Mr. Veitch. But it was the music that was most touching I +thought,—the sweet old songs of home. +</p> + +<p> +There was a considerable company assembled: near a hundred people I should +think. Our party made a large addition to the usual congregation. The Bishop’s +family is proverbially numerous: the consul, and the gentlemen of the mission, +have wives, and children, and English establishments. These, and the strangers, +occupied places down the room, to the right and left of the desk and +communion-table. The converts, and the members of the college, in rather a +scanty number, faced the officiating clergyman; before whom the silver maces of +the janissaries were set up, as they set up the beadles’ maces in England. +</p> + +<p> +I made many walks round the city to Olivet and Bethany, to the tombs of the +kings, and the fountains sacred in story. These are green and fresh, but all +the rest of the landscape seemed to me to be FRIGHTFUL. Parched mountains, with +a grey bleak olive-tree trembling here and there; savage ravines and valleys, +paved with tombstones—a landscape unspeakably ghastly and desolate, meet the +eye wherever you wander round about the city. The place seems quite adapted to +the events which are recorded in the Hebrew histories. It and they, as it seems +to me, can never be regarded without terror. Fear and blood, crime and +punishment, follow from page to page in frightful succession. There is not a +spot at which you look, but some violent deed has been done there: some +massacre has been committed, some victim has been murdered, some idol has been +worshipped with bloody and dreadful rites. Not far from hence is the place +where the Jewish conqueror fought for the possession of Jerusalem. “The sun +stood still, and hasted not to go down about a whole day;” so that the Jews +might have daylight to destroy the Amorites, whose iniquities were full, and +whose land they were about to occupy. The fugitive heathen king, and his +allies, were discovered in their hiding-place, and hanged: “and the children of +Judah smote Jerusalem with the edge of the sword, and set the city on fire; and +they left none remaining, but utterly destroyed all that breathed.” +</p> + +<p> +I went out at the Zion Gate, and looked at the so-called tomb of David. I had +been reading all the morning in the Psalms, and his history in Samuel and +Kings. “Bring thou down Shimei’s hoar head to the grave with blood,” are the +last words of the dying monarch as recorded by the history. What they call the +tomb is now a crumbling old mosque; from which Jew and Christian are excluded +alike. As I saw it, blazing in the sunshine, with the purple sky behind it, the +glare only served to mark the surrounding desolation more clearly. The lonely +walls and towers of the city rose hard by. Dreary mountains, and declivities of +naked stones, were round about: they are burrowed with holes in which Christian +hermits lived and died. You see one green place far down in the valley: it is +called En Rogel. Adonijah feasted there, who was killed by his brother Solomon, +for asking for Abishag for wife. The Valley of Hinnom skirts the hill: the +dismal ravine was a fruitful garden once. Ahaz, and the idolatrous kings, +sacrificed to idols under the green trees there, and “caused their children to +pass through the fire.” On the mountain opposite, Solomon, with the thousand +women of his harem, worshipped the gods of all their nations, “Ashtoreth,” and +“Milcom, and Molech, the abomination of the Ammonites.” An enormous +charnel-house stands on the hill where the bodies of dead pilgrims used to be +thrown; and common belief has fixed upon this spot as the Aceldama, which Judas +purchased with the price of his treason. Thus you go on from one gloomy place +to another, each seared with its bloody tradition. Yonder is the Temple, and +you think of Titus’s soldiery storming its flaming porches, and entering the +city, in the savage defence of which two million human souls perished. It was +on Mount Zion that Godfrey and Tancred had their camp: when the Crusaders +entered the mosque, they rode knee-deep in the blood of its defenders, and of +the women and children who had fled thither for refuge: it was the victory of +Joshua over again. Then, after three days of butchery, they purified the +desecrated mosque and went to prayer. In the centre of this history of crime +rises up the Great Murder of all . . . +</p> + +<p> +I need say no more about this gloomy landscape. After a man has seen it once, +he never forgets it—the recollection of it seems to me to follow him like a +remorse, as it were to implicate him in the awful deed which was done there. +Oh! with what unspeakable shame and terror should one think of that crime, and +prostrate himself before the image of that Divine Blessed Sufferer! +</p> + +<p> +Of course the first visit of the traveller is to the famous Church of the +Sepulchre. +</p> + +<p> +In the archway, leading from the street to the court and church, there is a +little bazaar of Bethlehemites, who must interfere considerably with the +commerce of the Latin fathers. These men bawl to you from their stalls, and +hold up for your purchase their devotional baubles,—bushels of rosaries and +scented beads, and carved mother-of-pearl shells, and rude stone salt-cellars +and figures. Now that inns are established—envoys of these pedlars attend them +on the arrival of strangers, squat all day on the terraces before your door, +and patiently entreat you to buy of their goods. Some worthies there are who +drive a good trade by tattooing pilgrims with the five crosses, the arms of +Jerusalem; under which the name of the city is punctured in Hebrew, with the +auspicious year of the Hadji’s visit. Several of our fellow- travellers +submitted to this queer operation, and will carry to their grave this relic of +their journey. Some of them had engaged as servant a man at Beyrout, who had +served as a lad on board an English ship in the Mediterranean. Above his +tattooage of the five crosses, the fellow had a picture of two hearts united, +and the pathetic motto, “Betsy my dear.” He had parted with Betsy my dear five +years before at Malta. He had known a little English there, but had forgotten +it. Betsy my dear was forgotten too. Only her name remained engraved with a +vain simulacrum of constancy on the faithless rogue’s skin: on which was now +printed another token of equally effectual devotion. The beads and the +tattooing, however, seem essential ceremonies attendant on the Christian +pilgrim’s visit; for many hundreds of years, doubtless, the palmers have +carried off with them these simple reminiscences of the sacred city. That +symbol has been engraven upon the arms of how many Princes, Knights, and +Crusaders! Don’t you see a moral as applicable to them as to the swindling +Beyrout horseboy? I have brought you back that cheap and wholesome apologue, in +lieu of any of the Bethlehemite shells and beads. +</p> + +<p> +After passing through the porch of the pedlars, you come to the courtyard in +front of the noble old towers of the Church of the Sepulchre, with pointed +arches and Gothic traceries, rude, but rich and picturesque in design. Here +crowds are waiting in the sun, until it shall please the Turkish guardians of +the church-door to open. A swarm of beggars sit here permanently: old tattered +hags with long veils, ragged children, blind old bearded beggars, who raise up +a chorus of prayers for money, holding out their wooden bowls, or clattering +with their sticks on the stones, or pulling your coat-skirts and moaning and +whining; yonder sit a group of coal-black Coptish pilgrims, with robes and +turbans of dark blue, fumbling their perpetual beads. A party of Arab +Christians have come up from their tents or villages: the men half-naked, +looking as if they were beggars, or banditti, upon occasion; the women have +flung their head-cloths back, and are looking at the strangers under their +tattooed eyebrows. As for the strangers, there is no need to describe THEM: +that figure of the Englishman, with his hands in his pockets, has been seen all +the world over: staring down the crater of Vesuvius, or into a Hottentot +kraal—or at a pyramid, or a Parisian coffee-house, or an Esquimaux hut—with the +same insolent calmness of demeanour. When the gates of the church are open, he +elbows in among the first, and flings a few scornful piastres to the Turkish +door-keeper; and gazes round easily at the place, in which people of every +other nation in the world are in tears, or in rapture, or wonder. He has never +seen the place until now, and looks as indifferent as the Turkish guardian who +sits in the doorway, and swears at the people as they pour in. +</p> + +<p> +Indeed, I believe it is impossible for us to comprehend the source and nature +of the Roman Catholic devotion. I once went into a church at Rome at the +request of a Catholic friend, who described the interior to be so beautiful and +glorious, that he thought (he said) it must be like heaven itself. I found +walls hung with cheap stripes of pink and white calico, altars covered with +artificial flowers, a number of wax candles, and plenty of gilt-paper +ornaments. The place seemed to me like a shabby theatre; and here was my friend +on his knees at my side, plunged in a rapture of wonder and devotion. +</p> + +<p> +I could get no better impression out of this the most famous church in the +world. The deceits are too open and flagrant; the inconsistencies and +contrivances too monstrous. It is hard even to sympathise with persons who +receive them as genuine; and though (as I know and saw in the case of my friend +at Rome) the believer’s life may be passed in the purest exercise of faith and +charity, it is difficult even to give him credit for honesty, so barefaced seem +the impostures which he professes to believe and reverence. It costs one no +small effort even to admit the possibility of a Catholic’s credulity: to share +in his rapture and devotion is still further out of your power; and I could get +from this church no other emotions but those of shame and pain. +</p> + +<p> +The legends with which the Greeks and Latins have garnished the spot have no +more sacredness for you than the hideous, unreal, barbaric pictures and +ornaments which they have lavished on it. Look at the fervour with which +pilgrims kiss and weep over a tawdry Gothic painting, scarcely better fashioned +than an idol in a South Sea Morai. The histories which they are called upon to +reverence are of the same period and order,—savage Gothic caricatures. In +either a saint appears in the costume of the middle ages, and is made to +accommodate himself to the fashion of the tenth century. +</p> + +<p> +The different churches battle for the possession of the various relics. The +Greeks show you the Tomb of Melchisedec, while the Armenians possess the Chapel +of the Penitent Thief; the poor Copts (with their little cabin of a chapel) can +yet boast of possessing the thicket in which Abraham caught the Ram, which was +to serve as the vicar of Isaac; the Latins point out the Pillar to which the +Lord was bound. The place of the Invention of the Sacred Cross, the Fissure in +the Rock of Golgotha, the Tomb of Adam himself—are all here within a few yards’ +space. You mount a few steps, and are told it is Calvary upon which you stand. +All this in the midst of blaring candles, reeking incense, savage pictures of +Scripture story, or portraits of kings who have been benefactors to the various +chapels; a din and clatter of strange people,—these weeping, bowing, +kissing,—those utterly indifferent; and the priests clad in outlandish robes, +snuffling and chanting incomprehensible litanies, robing, disrobing, lighting +up candles or extinguishing them, advancing, retreating, bowing with all sorts +of unfamiliar genuflexions. Had it pleased the inventors of the Sepulchre +topography to have fixed on fifty more spots of ground as the places of the +events of the sacred story, the pilgrim would have believed just as now. The +priest’s authority has so mastered his faith, that it accommodates itself to +any demand upon it; and the English stranger looks on the scene, for the first +time, with a feeling of scorn, bewilderment, and shame at that grovelling +credulity, those strange rites and ceremonies, that almost confessed imposture. +</p> + +<p> +Jarred and distracted by these, the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, for some +time, seems to an Englishman the least sacred spot about Jerusalem. It is the +lies, and the legends, and the priests, and their quarrels, and their +ceremonies, which keep the Holy Place out of sight. A man has not leisure to +view it, for the brawling of the guardians of the spot. The Roman conquerors, +they say, raised up a statue of Venus in this sacred place, intending to +destroy all memory of it. I don’t think the heathen was as criminal as the +Christian is now. To deny and disbelieve, is not so bad as to make belief a +ground to cheat upon. The liar Ananias perished for that; and yet out of these +gates, where angels may have kept watch—out of the tomb of Christ—Christian +priests issue with a lie in their hands. What a place to choose for imposture, +good God! to sully with brutal struggles for self-aggrandisement or shameful +schemes of gain! +</p> + +<p> +The situation of the Tomb (into which, be it authentic or not, no man can enter +without a shock of breathless fear, and deep and awful self-humiliation) must +have struck all travellers. It stands in the centre of the arched rotunda, +which is common to all denominations, and from which branch off the various +chapels belonging to each particular sect. In the Coptic chapel I saw one +coal-black Copt, in blue robes, cowering in the little cabin, surrounded by +dingy lamps, barbarous pictures, and cheap faded trumpery. In the Latin Church +there was no service going on, only two fathers dusting the mouldy gewgaws +along the brown walls, and laughing to one another. The gorgeous church of the +Fire impostors, hard by, was always more fully attended; as was that of their +wealthy neighbours, the Armenians. These three main sects hate each other; +their quarrels are interminable; each bribes and intrigues with the heathen +lords of the soil, to the prejudice of his neighbour. Now it is the Latins who +interfere, and allow the common church to go to ruin, because the Greeks +purpose to roof it; now the Greeks demolish a monastery on Mount Olivet, and +leave the ground to the Turks, rather than allow the Armenians to possess it. +On another occasion, the Greeks having mended the Armenian steps which lead to +the (so-called) Cave of the Nativity at Bethlehem, the latter asked for +permission to destroy the work of the Greeks, and did so. And so round this +sacred spot, the centre of Christendom, the representatives of the three great +sects worship under one roof, and hate each other! +</p> + +<p> +Above the Tomb of the Saviour, the cupola is OPEN, and you see the blue sky +overhead. Which of the builders was it that had the grace to leave that under +the high protection of Heaven, and not confine it under the mouldering old +domes and roofs, which cover so much selfishness, and uncharitableness, and +imposture? +</p> + +<p> +We went to Bethlehem, too; and saw the apocryphal wonders there. +</p> + +<p> +Five miles’ ride brings you from Jerusalem to it, over naked wavy hills; the +aspect of which, however, grows more cheerful as you approach the famous +village. We passed the Convent of Mar Elyas on the road, walled and barred like +a fort. In spite of its strength, however, it has more than once been stormed +by the Arabs, and the luckless fathers within put to death. Hard by was +Rebecca’s Well: a dead body was lying there, and crowds of male and female +mourners dancing and howling round it. Now and then a little troop of savage +scowling horsemen—a shepherd driving his black sheep, his gun over his +shoulder—a troop of camels—or of women, with long blue robes and white veils, +bearing pitchers, and staring at the strangers with their great solemn eyes—or +a company of labourers, with their donkeys, bearing grain or grapes to the +city,—met us and enlivened the little ride. It was a busy and cheerful scene. +The Church of the Nativity, with the adjoining convents, forms a vast and noble +Christian structure. A party of travellers were going to the Jordan that day, +and scores of their followers—of the robbing Arabs, who profess to protect them +(magnificent figures some of them, with flowing haicks and turbans, with long +guns and scimitars, and wretched horses, covered with gaudy trappings), were +standing on the broad pavement before the little convent gate. It was such a +scene as Cattermole might paint. Knights and Crusaders may have witnessed a +similar one. You could fancy them issuing out of the narrow little portal, and +so greeted by the swarms of swarthy clamorous women and merchants and children. +</p> + +<p> +The scene within the building was of the same Gothic character. We were +entertained by the Superior of the Greek Convent, in a fine refectory, with +ceremonies and hospitalities that pilgrims of the middle ages might have +witnessed. We were shown over the magnificent Barbaric Church, visited of +course the Grotto where the Blessed Nativity is said to have taken place, and +the rest of the idols set up for worship by the clumsy legend. When the visit +was concluded, the party going to the Dead Sea filed off with their armed +attendants; each individual traveller making as brave a show as he could, and +personally accoutred with warlike swords and pistols. The picturesque crowds, +and the Arabs and the horsemen, in the sunshine; the noble old convent, and the +grey-bearded priests, with their feast; and the church, and its pictures and +columns, and incense; the wide brown hills spreading round the village; with +the accidents of the road,—flocks and shepherds, wells and funerals, and +camel-trains,—have left on my mind a brilliant, romantic, and cheerful picture. +But you, dear M-, without visiting the place, have imagined one far finer; and +Bethlehem, where the Holy Child was born, and the angels sang, “Glory to God in +the highest, and on earth peace and goodwill towards men,” is the most sacred +and beautiful spot in the earth to you. +</p> + +<p> +By far the most comfortable quarters in Jerusalem are those of the Armenians, +in their convent of St. James. Wherever we have been, these Eastern quakers +look grave, and jolly, and sleek. Their convent at Mount Zion is big enough to +contain two or three thousand of their faithful; and their church is ornamented +by the most rich and hideous gifts ever devised by uncouth piety. Instead of a +bell, the fat monks of the convent beat huge noises on a board, and drub the +faithful in to prayers. I never saw men more lazy and rosy than these reverend +fathers, kneeling in their comfortable matted church, or sitting in easy +devotion. Pictures, images, gilding, tinsel, wax candles, twinkle all over the +place; and ten thousand ostrichs’ eggs (or any lesser number you may allot) +dangle from the vaulted ceiling. There were great numbers of people at worship +in this gorgeous church: they went on their knees, kissing the walls with much +fervour, and paying reverence to the most precious relic of the convent,—the +chair of St. James, their patron, the first Bishop of Jerusalem. +</p> + +<p> +The chair pointed out with greatest pride in the church of the Latin Convent, +is that shabby red damask one appropriated to the French Consul,—the +representative of the King of that nation,—and the protection which it has from +time immemorial accorded to the Christians of the Latin rite in Syria. All +French writers and travellers speak of this protection with delightful +complacency. Consult the French books of travel on the subject, and any +Frenchman whom you may meet: he says, “La France, Monsieur, de tous les temps +protege les Chretiens d’Orient;” and the little fellow looks round the church +with a sweep of the arm, and protects it accordingly. It is bon ton for them to +go in processions; and you see them on such errands, marching with long +candles, as gravely as may be. But I have never been able to edify myself with +their devotion; and the religious outpourings of Lamartine and Chateaubriand, +which we have all been reading a propos of the journey we are to make, have +inspired me with an emotion anything but respectful. “Voyez comme M. de +Chateaubriand prie Dieu,” the Viscount’s eloquence seems always to say. There +is a sanctified grimace about the little French pilgrim which it is very +difficult to contemplate gravely. +</p> + +<p> +The pictures, images, and ornaments of the principal Latin convent are quite +mean and poor, compared to the wealth of the Armenians. The convent is +spacious, but squalid. Many hopping and crawling plagues are said to attack the +skins of pilgrims who sleep there. It is laid out in courts and galleries, the +mouldy doors of which are decorated with twopenny pictures of favourite saints +and martyrs; and so great is the shabbiness and laziness, that you might fancy +yourself in a convent in Italy. Brown-clad fathers, dirty, bearded, and sallow, +go gliding about the corridors. The relic manufactory before mentioned carries +on a considerable business, and despatches bales of shells, crosses, and beads +to believers in Europe. These constitute the chief revenue of the convent now. +La France is no longer the most Christian kingdom, and her protection of the +Latins is not good for much since Charles X. was expelled; and Spain, which +used likewise to be generous on occasions (the gifts, arms, candlesticks, +baldaquins of the Spanish sovereigns figure pretty frequently in the various +Latin chapels), has been stingy since the late disturbances, the spoliation of +the clergy, &c. After we had been taken to see the humble curiosities of +the place, the Prior treated us in his wooden parlour with little glasses of +pink Rosolio, brought with many bows and genuflexions by his reverence the +convent butler. +</p> + +<p> +After this community of holy men, the most important perhaps is the American +Convent, a Protestant congregation of Independents chiefly, who deliver tracts, +propose to make converts, have meetings of their own, and also swell the little +congregation that attends the Anglican service. I have mentioned our fellow- +traveller, the Consul-General for Syria of the United States. He was a +tradesman, who had made a considerable fortune, and lived at a country-house in +comfortable retirement. But his opinion is, that the prophecies of Scripture +are about to be accomplished; that the day of the return of the Jews is at +hand, and the glorification of the restored Jerusalem. He is to witness this—he +and a favourite dove with which he travels; and he forsook home and comfortable +country-house, in order to make this journey. He has no other knowledge of +Syria but what he derives from the prophecy; and this (as he takes the office +gratis) has been considered a sufficient reason for his appointment by the +United States Government. As soon as he arrived, he sent and demanded an +interview with the Pasha; explained to him his interpretation of the +Apocalypse, in which he has discovered that the Five Powers and America are +about to intervene in Syrian affairs, and the infallible return of the Jews to +Palestine. The news must have astonished the Lieutenant of the Sublime Porte; +and since the days of the Kingdom of Munster, under his Anabaptist Majesty, +John of Leyden, I doubt whether any Government has received or appointed so +queer an ambassador. The kind, worthy, simple man took me to his temporary +consulate-house at the American Missionary Establishment; and, under pretence +of treating me to white wine, expounded his ideas; talked of futurity as he +would about an article in The Times; and had no more doubt of seeing a divine +kingdom established in Jerusalem than you that there would be a levee next +spring at St. James’s. The little room in which we sat was padded with +missionary tracts, but I heard of scarce any converts—not more than are made by +our own Episcopal establishment. +</p> + +<p> +But if the latter’s religious victories are small, and very few people are +induced by the American tracts, and the English preaching and catechising, to +forsake their own manner of worshipping the Divine Being in order to follow +ours; yet surely our religious colony of men and women can’t fail to do good, +by the sheer force of good example, pure life, and kind offices. The ladies of +the mission have numbers of clients, of all persuasions, in the town, to whom +they extend their charities. Each of their houses is a model of neatness, and a +dispensary of gentle kindnesses; and the ecclesiastics have formed a modest +centre of civilisation in the place. A dreary joke was made in the House of +Commons about Bishop Alexander and the Bishopess his lady, and the Bishoplings +his numerous children, who were said to have scandalised the people of +Jerusalem. That sneer evidently came from the Latins and Greeks; for what could +the Jews and Turks care because an English clergyman had a wife and children as +their own priests have? There was no sort of ill will exhibited towards them, +as far as I could learn; and I saw the Bishop’s children riding about the town +as safely as they could about Hyde Park. All Europeans, indeed, seemed to me to +be received with forbearance, and almost courtesy, within the walls. As I was +going about making sketches, the people would look on very good-humouredly, +without offering the least interruption; nay, two or three were quite ready to +stand still for such an humble portrait as my pencil could make of them; and +the sketch done, it was passed from one person to another, each making his +comments, and signifying a very polite approval. Here are a pair of them, {2} +Fath Allah and Ameenut Daoodee his father, horse-dealers by trade, who came and +sat with us at the inn, and smoked pipes (the sun being down), while the +original of the above masterpiece was made. With the Arabs outside the walls, +however, and the freshly arriving country people, this politeness was not so +much exhibited. There was a certain tattooed girl, with black eyes and huge +silver earrings, and a chin delicately picked out with blue, who formed one of +a group of women outside the great convent, whose likeness I longed to carry +off;— there was a woman with a little child, with wondering eyes, drawing water +at the Pool of Siloam, in such an attitude and dress as Rebecca may have had +when Isaac’s lieutenant asked her for drink:- both of these parties standing +still for half a minute, at the next cried out for backsheesh: and not content +with the five piastres which I gave them individually, screamed out for more, +and summoned their friends, who screamed out backsheesh too. I was pursued into +the convent by a dozen howling women calling for pay, barring the door against +them, to the astonishment of the worthy papa who kept it; and at Miriam’s Well +the women were joined by a man with a large stick, who backed their petition. +But him we could afford to laugh at, for we were two and had sticks likewise. +</p> + +<p> +In the village of Siloam I would not recommend the artist to loiter. A colony +of ruffians inhabit the dismal place, who have guns as well as sticks at need. +Their dogs howl after the strangers as they pass through; and over the parapets +of their walls you are saluted by the scowls of a villanous set of +countenances, that it is not good to see with one pair of eyes. They shot a man +at mid-day at a few hundred yards from the gates while we were at Jerusalem, +and no notice was taken of the murder. Hordes of Arab robbers infest the +neighbourhood of the city, with the Sheikhs of whom travellers make terms when +minded to pursue their journey. I never could understand why the walls stopped +these warriors if they had a mind to plunder the city, for there are but a +hundred and fifty men in the garrison to man the long lonely lines of defence. +</p> + +<p> +I have seen only in Titian’s pictures those magnificent purple shadows in which +the hills round about lay, as the dawn rose faintly behind them; and we looked +at Olivet for the last time from our terrace, where we were awaiting the +arrival of the horses that were to carry us to Jaffa. A yellow moon was still +blazing in the midst of countless brilliant stars overhead; the nakedness and +misery of the surrounding city were hidden in that beautiful rosy atmosphere of +mingling night and dawn. The city never looked so noble; the mosques, domes, +and minarets rising up into the calm star-lit sky. +</p> + +<p> +By the gate of Bethlehem there stands one palm-tree, and a house with three +domes. Put these and the huge old Gothic gate as a background dark against the +yellowing eastern sky: the foreground is a deep grey: as you look into it dark +forms of horsemen come out of the twilight: now there come lanterns, more +horsemen, a litter with mules, a crowd of Arab horseboys and dealers +accompanying their beasts to the gate; all the members of our party come up by +twos and threes; and, at last, the great gate opens just before sunrise, and we +get into the grey plains. +</p> + +<p> +Oh! the luxury of an English saddle! An English servant of one of the gentlemen +of the mission procured it for me, on the back of a little mare, which (as I am +a light weight) did not turn a hair in the course of the day’s march—and after +we got quit of the ugly, stony, clattering, mountainous Abou Gosh district, +into the fair undulating plain, which stretches to Ramleh, carried me into the +town at a pleasant hand-gallop. A negro, of preternatural ugliness, in a yellow +gown, with a crimson handkerchief streaming over his head, digging his shovel +spurs into the lean animal he rode, and driving three others before—swaying +backwards and forwards on his horse, now embracing his ears, and now almost +under his belly, screaming “yallah” with the most frightful shrieks, and +singing country songs—galloped along ahead of me. I acquired one of his poems +pretty well, and could imitate his shriek accurately; but I shall not have the +pleasure of singing it to you in England. I had forgotten the delightful +dissonance two days after, both the negro’s and that of a real Arab minstrel, a +donkey-driver accompanying our baggage, who sang and grinned with the most +amusing good-humour. +</p> + +<p> +We halted, in the middle of the day, in a little wood of olive- trees, which +forms almost the only shelter between Jaffa and Jerusalem, except that afforded +by the orchards in the odious village of Abou Gosh, through which we went at a +double quick pace. Under the olives, or up in the branches, some of our friends +took a siesta. I have a sketch of four of them so employed. Two of them were +dead within a month of the fatal Syrian fever. But we did not know how near +fate was to us then. Fires were lighted, and fowls and eggs divided, and tea +and coffee served round in tin panikins, and here we lighted pipes, and smoked +and laughed at our ease. I believe everybody was happy to be out of Jerusalem. +The impression I have of it now is of ten days passed in a fever. +</p> + +<p> +We all found quarters in the Greek convent at Ramleh, where the monks served us +a supper on a terrace, in a pleasant sunset; a beautiful and cheerful landscape +stretching around; the land in graceful undulations, the towers and mosques +rosy in the sunset, with no lack of verdure, especially of graceful palms. +Jaffa was nine miles off. As we rode all the morning we had been accompanied by +the smoke of our steamer, twenty miles off at sea. +</p> + +<p> +The convent is a huge caravanserai; only three or four monks dwell in it, the +ghostly hotel-keepers of the place. The horses were tied up and fed in the +courtyard, into which we rode; above were the living-rooms, where there is +accommodation, not only for an unlimited number of pilgrims, but for a vast and +innumerable host of hopping and crawling things, who usually persist in +partaking of the traveller’s bed. Let all thin-skinned travellers in the East +be warned on no account to travel without the admirable invention described in +Mr. Fellowes’s book; nay, possibly invented by that enterprising and learned +traveller. You make a sack, of calico or linen, big enough for the body, +appended to which is a closed chimney of muslin, stretched out by cane hoops, +and fastened up to a beam, or against the wall. You keep a sharp eye to see +that no flea or bug is on the look-out, and when assured of this, you pop into +the bag, tightly closing the orifice after you. This admirable bug-disappointer +I tried at Ramleh, and had the only undisturbed night’s rest I enjoyed in the +East. To be sure it was a short night, for our party were stirring at one +o’clock, and those who got up insisted on talking and keeping awake those who +inclined to sleep. But I shall never forget the terror inspired in my mind, +being shut up in the bug-disappointer, when a facetious lay-brother of the +convent fell upon me and began tickling me. I never had the courage again to +try the anti-flea contrivance, preferring the friskiness of those animals to +the sports of such a greasy grinning wag as my friend at Ramleh. +</p> + +<p> +In the morning, and long before sunrise, our little caravan was in marching +order again. We went out with lanterns and shouts of “yallah” through the +narrow streets, and issued into the plain, where, though there was no moon, +there were blazing stars shining steadily overhead. They become friends to a +man who travels, especially under the clear Eastern sky; whence they look down +as if protecting you, solemn, yellow, and refulgent. They seem nearer to you +than in Europe; larger and more awful. So we rode on till the dawn rose, and +Jaffa came in view. The friendly ship was lying out in waiting for us; the +horses were given up to their owners; and in the midst of a crowd of naked +beggars, and a perfect storm of curses and yells for backsheesh, our party got +into their boats, and to the ship, where we were welcomed by the very best +captain that ever sailed upon this maritime globe, namely, Captain Samuel +Lewis, of the Peninsular and Oriental Company’s Service. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0014"></a> +CHAPTER XIV<br/> +FROM JAFFA TO ALEXANDRIA</h2> + +<p> +[From the Providor’s Log-book.] +</p> + +<p> +Bill of Fare, October 12th. +</p> + +<p> +Mulligatawny Soup. Salt Fish and Egg Sauce. Roast Haunch of Mutton. Boiled +Shoulder and Onion Sauce. Boiled Beef. Roast Fowls. Pillau ditto. Ham. Haricot +Mutton. Curry and Rice. +</p> + +<p> +Cabbage. French Beans. Boiled Potatoes. Baked ditto. Damson Tart. Rice +Puddings. Currant ditto. Currant Fritters. +</p> + +<p> +We were just at the port’s mouth—and could see the towers and buildings of +Alexandria rising purple against the sunset, when the report of a gun came +booming over the calm golden water; and we heard, with much mortification, that +we had no chance of getting pratique that night. Already the ungrateful +passengers had begun to tire of the ship,—though in our absence in Syria it had +been carefully cleansed and purified; though it was cleared of the swarming +Jews who had infested the decks all the way from Constantinople; and though we +had been feasting and carousing in the manner described above. +</p> + +<p> +But very early next morning we bore into the harbour, busy with a great +quantity of craft. We passed huge black hulks of mouldering men-of-war, from +the sterns of which trailed the dirty red flag, with the star and crescent; +boats, manned with red-capped seamen, and captains and steersmen in beards and +tarbooshes, passed continually among these old hulks, the rowers bending to +their oars, so that at each stroke they disappeared bodily in the boat. Besides +these, there was a large fleet of country ships, and stars and stripes, and +tricolours, and Union Jacks; and many active steamers, of the French and +English companies, shooting in and out of the harbour, or moored in the briny +waters. The ship of our company, the “Oriental,” lay there—a palace upon the +brine, and some of the Pasha’s steam-vessels likewise, looking very like +Christian boats; but it was queer to look at some unintelligible Turkish +flourish painted on the stern, and the long-tailed Arabian hieroglyphics gilt +on the paddle-boxes. Our dear friend and comrade of Beyrout (if we may be +permitted to call her so), H.M.S. “Trump,” was in the harbour; and the captain +of that gallant ship, coming to greet us, drove some of us on shore in his gig. +</p> + +<p> +I had been preparing myself overnight, by the help of a cigar and a moonlight +contemplation on deck, for sensations on landing in Egypt. I was ready to yield +myself up with solemnity to the mystic grandeur of the scene of initiation. +Pompey’s Pillar must stand like a mountain, in a yellow plain, surrounded by a +grove of obelisks as tall as palm-trees. Placid sphinxes brooding o’er the +Nile—mighty Memnonian countenances calm—had revealed Egypt to me in a sonnet of +Tennyson’s, and I was ready to gaze on it with pyramidal wonder and +hieroglyphic awe. +</p> + +<p> +The landing quay at Alexandria is like the dockyard quay at Portsmouth: with a +few score of brown faces scattered among the population. There are +slop-sellers, dealers in marine-stores, bottled-porter shops, seamen lolling +about; flys and cabs are plying for hire; and a yelling chorus of donkey-boys, +shrieking, “Ride, sir!—Donkey, sir!—I say, sir!” in excellent English, dispel +all romantic notions. The placid sphinxes brooding o’er the Nile disappeared +with that shriek of the donkey-boys. You might be as well impressed with +Wapping as with your first step on Egyptian soil. +</p> + +<p> +The riding of a donkey is, after all, not a dignified occupation. A man resists +the offer at first, somehow, as an indignity. How is that poor little, +red-saddled, long-eared creature to carry you? Is there to be one for you, and +another for your legs? Natives and Europeans, of all sizes, pass by, it is +true, mounted upon the same contrivance. I waited until I got into a very +private spot, where nobody could see me, and then ascended—why not say +descended, at once?—on the poor little animal. Instead of being crushed at +once, as perhaps the rider expected, it darted forward, quite briskly and +cheerfully, at six or seven miles an hour; requiring no spur or admonitive to +haste, except the shrieking of the little Egyptian gamin, who ran along by +asinus’s side. +</p> + +<p> +The character of the houses by which you pass is scarcely Eastern at all. The +streets are busy with a motley population of Jews and Armenians, +slave-driving-looking Europeans, large-breeched Greeks, and well-shaven buxom +merchants, looking as trim and fat as those on the Bourse or on ’Change; only, +among the natives, the stranger can’t fail to remark (as the Caliph did of the +Calenders in the “Arabian Nights”) that so many of them HAVE ONLY ONE EYE. It +is the horrid ophthalmia which has played such frightful ravages with them. You +see children sitting in the doorways, their eyes completely closed up with the +green sickening sore, and the flies feeding on them. Five or six minutes of the +donkey-ride brings you to the Frank quarter, and the handsome broad street +(like a street of Marseilles) where the principal hotels and merchants’ houses +are to be found, and where the consuls have their houses, and hoist their +flags. The palace of the French Consul-General makes the grandest show in the +street, and presents a great contrast to the humble abode of the English +representative, who protects his fellow-countrymen from a second floor. +</p> + +<p> +But that Alexandrian two-pair-front of a Consulate was more welcome and +cheering than a palace to most of us. For there lay certain letters, with +post-marks of HOME upon them; and kindly tidings, the first heard for two +months:- though we had seen so many men and cities since, that Cornhill seemed +to be a year off, at least, with certain persons dwelling (more or less) in +that vicinity. I saw a young Oxford man seize his despatches, and slink off +with several letters, written in a tight neat hand, and sedulously crossed; +which any man could see, without looking farther, were the handiwork of Mary +Ann, to whom he is attached. The lawyer received a bundle from his chambers, in +which his clerk eased his soul regarding the state of Snooks v. Rodgers, Smith +ats Tomkins, &c. The statesman had a packet of thick envelopes, decorated +with that profusion of sealing-wax in which official recklessness lavishes the +resources of the country: and your humble servant got just one little modest +letter, containing another, written in pencil characters, varying in size +between one and two inches; but how much pleasanter to read than my Lord’s +despatch, or the clerk’s account of Smith ats Tomkins,—yes, even than the Mary +Ann correspondence! . . . Yes, my dear madam, you will understand me, when I +say that it was from little Polly at home, with some confidential news about a +cat, and the last report of her new doll. +</p> + +<p> +It is worth while to have made the journey for this pleasure: to have walked +the deck on long nights, and have thought of home. You have no leisure to do so +in the city. You don’t see the heavens shine above you so purely there, or the +stars so clearly. How, after the perusal of the above documents, we enjoyed a +file of the admirable Galignani; and what O’Connell was doing; and the twelve +last new victories of the French in Algeria; and, above all, six or seven +numbers of Punch! There might have been an avenue of Pompey’s Pillars within +reach, and a live sphinx sporting on the banks of the Mahmoodieh Canal, and we +would not have stirred to see them, until Punch had had his interview and +Galignani was dismissed. +</p> + +<p> +The curiosities of Alexandria are few, and easily seen. We went into the +bazaars, which have a much more Eastern look than the European quarter, with +its Anglo-Gallic-Italian inhabitants, and Babel-like civilisation. Here and +there a large hotel, clumsy and whitewashed, with Oriental trellised windows, +and a couple of slouching sentinels at the doors, in the ugliest composite +uniform that ever was seen, was pointed out as the residence of some great +officer of the Pasha’s Court, or of one of the numerous children of the +Egyptian Solomon. His Highness was in his own palace, and was consequently not +visible. He was in deep grief, and strict retirement. It was at this time that +the European newspapers announced that he was about to resign his empire; but +the quidnuncs of Alexandria hinted that a love-affair, in which the old +potentate had engaged with senile extravagance, and the effects of a potion of +hachisch, or some deleterious drug, with which he was in the habit of +intoxicating himself, had brought on that languor and desperate weariness of +life and governing, into which the venerable Prince was plunged. Before three +days were over, however, the fit had left him, and he determined to live and +reign a little longer. A very few days afterwards several of our party were +presented to him at Cairo, and found the great Egyptian ruler perfectly +convalescent. +</p> + +<p> +This, and the Opera, and the quarrels of the two prime donne, and the beauty of +one of them, formed the chief subjects of conversation; and I had this +important news in the shop of a certain barber in the town, who conveyed it in +a language composed of French, Spanish, and Italian, and with a volubility +quite worthy of a barber of “Gil Blas.” +</p> + +<p> +Then we went to see the famous obelisk presented by Mehemet Ali to the British +Government, who have not shown a particular alacrity to accept this ponderous +present. The huge shaft lies on the ground, prostrate, and desecrated by all +sorts of abominations. Children were sprawling about, attracted by the dirt +there. Arabs, negroes, and donkey-boys were passing, quite indifferent, by the +fallen monster of a stone—as indifferent as the British Government, who don’t +care for recording the glorious termination of their Egyptian campaign of 1801. +If our country takes the compliment so coolly, surely it would be disloyal upon +our parts to be more enthusiastic. I wish they would offer the Trafalgar Square +Pillar to the Egyptians; and that both of the huge ugly monsters were lying in +the dirt there side by side. +</p> + +<p> +Pompey’s Pillar is by no means so big as the Charing Cross trophy. This +venerable column has not escaped ill-treatment either. Numberless ships’ +companies, travelling cockneys, &c., have affixed their rude marks upon it. +Some daring ruffian even painted the name of “Warren’s blacking” upon it, +effacing other inscriptions,— one, Wilkinson says, of “the second +Psammetichus.” I regret deeply, my dear friend, that I cannot give you this +document respecting a lamented monarch, in whose history I know you take such +an interest. +</p> + +<p> +The best sight I saw in Alexandria was a negro holiday; which was celebrated +outside of the town by a sort of negro village of huts, swarming with old, +lean, fat, ugly, infantine, happy faces, that nature had smeared with a +preparation even more black and durable than that with which Psammetichus’s +base has been polished. Every one of these jolly faces was on the broad grin, +from the dusky mother to the india-rubber child sprawling upon her back, and +the venerable jetty senior whose wool was as white as that of a sheep in +Florian’s pastorals. +</p> + +<p> +To these dancers a couple of fellows were playing on a drum and a little banjo. +They were singing a chorus, which was not only singular, and perfectly marked +in the rhythm, but exceeding sweet in the tune. They danced in a circle; and +performers came trooping from all quarters, who fell into the round, and began +waggling their heads, and waving their left hands, and tossing up and down the +little thin rods which they each carried, and all singing to the very best of +their power. +</p> + +<p> +I saw the chief eunuch of the Grand Turk at Constantinople pass by- -(here is +an accurate likeness of his beautiful features {2})—but with what a different +expression! Though he is one of the greatest of the great in the Turkish Empire +(ranking with a Cabinet Minister or Lord Chamberlain here), his fine +countenance was clouded with care, and savage with ennui. +</p> + +<p> +Here his black brethren were ragged, starving, and happy; and I need not tell +such a fine moralist as you are, how it is the case, in the white as well as +the black world, that happiness (republican leveller, who does not care a fig +for the fashion) often disdains the turrets of kings, to pay a visit to the +“tabernas pauperum.” +</p> + +<p> +We went the round of the coffee-houses in the evening, both the polite European +places of resort, where you get ices and the French papers, and those in the +town, where Greeks, Turks, and general company resort, to sit upon +uncomfortable chairs, and drink wretched muddy coffee, and to listen to two or +three miserable musicians, who keep up a variation of howling for hours +together. But the pretty song of the niggers had spoiled me for that abominable +music. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2HCH0015"></a> +CHAPTER XV<br/> +TO CAIRO</h2> + +<p> +We had no need of hiring the country boats which ply on the Mahmoodieh Canal to +Atfeh, where it joins the Nile, but were accommodated in one of the Peninsular +and Oriental Company’s fly- boats; pretty similar to those narrow Irish canal +boats in which the enterprising traveller has been carried from Dublin to +Ballinasloe. The present boat was, to be sure, tugged by a little steamer, so +that the Egyptian canal is ahead of the Irish in so far: in natural scenery, +the one prospect is fully equal to the other; it must be confessed that there +is nothing to see. In truth, there was nothing but this: you saw a muddy bank +on each side of you, and a blue sky overhead. A few round mud-huts and +palm-trees were planted along the line here and there. Sometimes we would see, +on the water-side, a woman in a blue robe, with her son by her, in that tight +brown costume with which Nature had supplied him. Now, it was a hat dropped by +one of the party into the water; a brown Arab plunged and disappeared +incontinently after the hat, re-issued from the muddy water, prize in hand, and +ran naked after the little steamer (which was by this time far ahead of him), +his brawny limbs shining in the sun: then we had half-cold fowls and bitter +ale: then we had dinner—bitter ale and cold fowls; with which incidents the day +on the canal passed away, as harmlessly as if we had been in a Dutch +trackschuyt. +</p> + +<p> +Towards evening we arrived at the town of Atfeh—half land, half houses, half +palm-trees, with swarms of half-naked people crowding the rustic shady bazaars, +and bartering their produce of fruit or many-coloured grain. Here the canal +came to a check, ending abruptly with a large lock. A little fleet of masts and +country ships were beyond the lock, and it led into THE NILE. +</p> + +<p> +After all, it is something to have seen these red waters. It is only low green +banks, mud-huts, and palm-clumps, with the sun setting red behind them, and the +great, dull, sinuous river flashing here and there in the light. But it is the +Nile, the old Saturn of a stream—a divinity yet, though younger river-gods have +deposed him. Hail! O venerable father of crocodiles! We were all lost in +sentiments of the profoundest awe and respect; which we proved by tumbling down +into the cabin of the Nile steamer that was waiting to receive us, and fighting +and cheating for sleeping- berths. +</p> + +<p> +At dawn in the morning we were on deck; the character had not altered of the +scenery about the river. Vast flat stretches of land were on either side, +recovering from the subsiding inundations: near the mud villages, a country +ship or two was roosting under the date-trees; the landscape everywhere +stretching away level and lonely. In the sky in the east was a long streak of +greenish light, which widened and rose until it grew to be of an opal colour, +then orange; then, behold, the round red disc of the sun rose flaming up above +the horizon. All the water blushed as he got up; the deck was all red; the +steersman gave his helm to another, and prostrated himself on the deck, and +bowed his head eastward, and praised the Maker of the sun: it shone on his +white turban as he was kneeling, and gilt up his bronzed face, and sent his +blue shadow over the glowing deck. The distances, which had been grey, were now +clothed in purple; and the broad stream was illuminated. As the sun rose +higher, the morning blush faded away; the sky was cloudless and pale, and the +river and the surrounding landscape were dazzlingly clear. +</p> + +<p> +Looking ahead in an hour or two, we saw the Pyramids. Fancy my sensations, dear +M -: two big ones and a little one - +</p> + +<p> +! ! ! +</p> + +<p> +There they lay, rosy and solemn in the distance—those old, majestical, +mystical, familiar edifices. Several of us tried to be impressed; but breakfast +supervening, a rush was made at the coffee and cold pies, and the sentiment of +awe was lost in the scramble for victuals. +</p> + +<p> +Are we so blases of the world that the greatest marvels in it do not succeed in +moving us? Have society, Pall Mall clubs, and a habit of sneering, so withered +up our organs of veneration that we can admire no more? My sensation with +regard to the Pyramids was, that I had seen them before: then came a feeling of +shame that the view of them should awaken no respect. Then I wanted (naturally) +to see whether my neighbours were any more enthusiastic than myself—Trinity +College, Oxford, was busy with the cold ham: Downing Street was particularly +attentive to a bunch of grapes: Figtree Court behaved with decent propriety; he +is in good practice, and of a Conservative turn of mind, which leads him to +respect from principle les faits accomplis: perhaps he remembered that one of +them was as big as Lincoln’s Inn Fields. But, the truth is, nobody was +seriously moved . . . And why should they, because of an exaggeration of bricks +ever so enormous? I confess, for my part, that the Pyramids are very big. +</p> + +<p> +After a voyage of about thirty hours, the steamer brought up at the quay of +Boulak, amidst a small fleet of dirty comfortless cangias, in which cottons and +merchandise were loading and unloading, and a huge noise and bustle on the +shore. Numerous villas, parks, and country-houses had begun to decorate the +Cairo bank of the stream ere this: residences of the Pasha’s nobles, who have +had orders to take their pleasure here and beautify the precincts of the +capital; tall factory chimneys also rise here; there are foundries and +steam-engine manufactories. These, and the pleasure-houses, stand as trim as +soldiers on parade; contrasting with the swarming, slovenly, close, +tumble-down, Eastern old town, that forms the outport of Cairo, and was built +before the importation of European taste and discipline. +</p> + +<p> +Here we alighted upon donkeys, to the full as brisk as those of Alexandria, +invaluable to timid riders, and equal to any weight. We had a Jerusalem pony +race into Cairo; my animal beating all the rest by many lengths. The entrance +to the capital, from Boulak, is very pleasant and picturesque—over a fair road, +and the wide- planted plain of the Ezbekieh; where are gardens, canals, fields, +and avenues of trees, and where the great ones of the town come and take their +pleasure. We saw many barouches driving about with fat Pashas lolling on the +cushions; stately-looking colonels and doctors taking their ride, followed by +their orderlies or footmen; lines of people taking pipes and sherbet in the +coffee-houses; and one of the pleasantest sights of all,—a fine new white +building with HOTEL D’ORIENT written up in huge French characters, and which, +indeed, is an establishment as large and comfortable as most of the best inns +of the South of France. As a hundred Christian people, or more, come from +England and from India every fortnight, this inn has been built to accommodate +a large proportion of them; and twice a month, at least, its sixty rooms are +full. +</p> + +<p> +The gardens from the windows give a very pleasant and animated view: the +hotel-gate is besieged by crews of donkey-drivers; the noble stately Arab +women, with tawny skins (of which a simple robe of floating blue cotton enables +you liberally to see the colour) and large black eyes, come to the well hard by +for water: camels are perpetually arriving and setting down their loads: the +court is full of bustling dragomans, ayahs, and children from India; and poor +old venerable he-nurses, with grey beards and crimson turbans, tending little +white-faced babies that have seen the light at Dumdum or Futtyghur: a +copper-coloured barber, seated on his hams, is shaving a camel-driver at the +great inn-gate. The bells are ringing prodigiously; and Lieutenant Waghorn is +bouncing in and out of the courtyard full of business. He only left Bombay +yesterday morning, was seen in the Red Sea on Tuesday, is engaged to dinner +this afternoon in the Regent’s Park, and (as it is about two minutes since I +saw him in the courtyard) I make no doubt he is by this time at Alexandria, or +at Malta, say, perhaps, at both. Il en est capable. If any man can be at two +places at once (which I don’t believe or deny) Waghorn is he. +</p> + +<p> +Six o’clock bell rings. Sixty people sit down to a quasi-French banquet: thirty +Indian officers in moustaches and jackets; ten civilians in ditto and +spectacles; ten pale-faced ladies with ringlets, to whom all pay prodigious +attention. All the pale ladies drink pale ale, which, perhaps, accounts for it; +in fact the Bombay and Suez passengers have just arrived, and hence this +crowding and bustling, and display of military jackets and moustaches, and +ringlets and beauty. The windows are open, and a rush of mosquitoes from the +Ezbekieh waters, attracted by the wax candles, adds greatly to the excitement +of the scene. There was a little tough old Major, who persisted in flinging +open the windows, to admit these volatile creatures, with a noble disregard to +their sting—and the pale ringlets did not seem to heed them either, though the +delicate shoulders of some of them were bare. +</p> + +<p> +All the meat, ragouts, fricandeaux, and roasts, which are served round at +dinner, seem to me to be of the same meat: a black uncertain sort of viand do +these “fleshpots of Egypt” contain. But what the meat is no one knew: is it the +donkey? The animal is more plentiful than any other in Cairo. +</p> + +<p> +After dinner, the ladies retiring, some of us take a mixture of hot water, +sugar, and pale French brandy, which is said to be deleterious, but is by no +means unpalatable. One of the Indians offers a bundle of Bengal cheroots; and +we make acquaintance with those honest bearded white-jacketed Majors and +military Commanders, finding England here in a French hotel kept by an Italian, +at the city of Grand Cairo, in Africa. +</p> + +<p> +On retiring to bed you take a towel with you into the sacred interior, behind +the mosquito curtains. Then your duty is, having tucked the curtains closely +around, to flap and bang violently with this towel, right and left, and +backwards and forwards, until every mosquito should have been massacred that +may have taken refuge within your muslin canopy. +</p> + +<p> +Do what you will, however, one of them always escapes the murder; and as soon +as the candle is out the miscreant begins his infernal droning and trumpeting; +descends playfully upon your nose and face, and so lightly that you don’t know +that he touches you. But that for a week afterwards you bear about marks of his +ferocity, you might take the invisible little being to be a creature of fancy—a +mere singing in your ears. +</p> + +<p> +This, as an account of Cairo, dear M-, you will probably be disposed to +consider as incomplete: the fact is, I have seen nothing else as yet. I have +peered into no harems. The magicians, proved to be humbugs, have been +bastinadoed out of town. The dancing-girls, those lovely Alme, of whom I had +hoped to be able to give a glowing and elegant, though strictly moral, +description, have been whipped into Upper Egypt, and as you are saying in your +mind— Well, it ISN’T a good description of Cairo: you are perfectly right. It +is England in Egypt. I like to see her there with her pluck, enterprise, +manliness, bitter ale, and Harvey Sauce. Wherever they come they stay and +prosper. From the summit of yonder Pyramids forty centuries may look down on +them if they are minded; and I say, those venerable daughters of time ought to +be better pleased by the examination, than by regarding the French bayonets and +General Bonaparte, Member of the Institute, fifty years ago, running about with +sabre and pigtail. Wonders he did, to be sure, and then ran away, leaving +Kleber, to be murdered, in the lurch—a few hundred yards from the spot where +these disquisitions are written. But what are his wonders compared to Waghorn? +Nap massacred the Mamelukes at the Pyramids: Wag has conquered the Pyramids +themselves; dragged the unwieldy structures a month nearer England than they +were, and brought the country along with them. All the trophies and captives +that ever were brought to Roman triumph were not so enormous and wonderful as +this. All the heads that Napoleon ever caused to be struck off (as George +Cruikshank says) would not elevate him a monument as big. Be ours the trophies +of peace! O my country! O Waghorn! Hae tibi erunt artes. When I go to the +Pyramids I will sacrifice in your name, and pour out libations of bitter ale +and Harvey Sauce in your honour. +</p> + +<p> +One of the noblest views in the world is to be seen from the citadel, which we +ascended to-day. You see the city stretching beneath it, with a thousand +minarets and mosques,—the great river curling through the green plains, studded +with innumerable villages. The Pyramids are beyond, brilliantly distinct; and +the lines and fortifications of the height, and the arsenal lying below. Gazing +down, the guide does not fail to point out the famous Mameluke leap, by which +one of the corps escaped death, at the time that His Highness the Pasha +arranged the general massacre of the body. +</p> + +<p> +The venerable Patriarch’s harem is close by, where he received, with much +distinction, some of the members of our party. We were allowed to pass very +close to the sacred precincts, and saw a comfortable white European building, +approached by flights of steps, and flanked by pretty gardens. Police and +law-courts were here also, as I understood; but it was not the time of the +Egyptian assizes. It would have been pleasant, otherwise, to see the Chief Cadi +in his hall of justice; and painful, though instructive, to behold the +immediate application of the bastinado. +</p> + +<p> +The great lion of the place is a new mosque which Mehemet Ali is constructing +very leisurely. It is built of alabaster of a fair white, with a delicate +blushing tinge; but the ornaments are European—the noble, fantastic, beautiful +Oriental art is forgotten. The old mosques of the city, of which I entered two, +and looked at many, are a thousand times more beautiful. Their variety of +ornament is astonishing,—the difference in the shapes of the domes, the +beautiful fancies and caprices in the forms of the minarets, which violate the +rules of proportion with the most happy daring grace, must have struck every +architect who has seen them. As you go through the streets, these architectural +beauties keep the eye continually charmed: now it is a marble fountain, with +its arabesque and carved overhanging roof, which you can look at with as much +pleasure as an antique gem, so neat and brilliant is the execution of it; then, +you come to the arched entrance to a mosque, which shoots up like—like +what?—like the most beautiful pirouette by Taglioni, let us say. This +architecture is not sublimely beautiful, perfect loveliness and calm, like that +which was revealed to us at the Parthenon (and in comparison of which the +Pantheon and Colosseum are vulgar and coarse, mere broad-shouldered Titans +before ambrosial Jove); but these fantastic spires, and cupolas, and galleries, +excite, amuse, tickle the imagination, so to speak, and perpetually fascinate +the eye. There were very few believers in the famous mosque of Sultan Hassan +when we visited it, except the Moslemitish beadle, who was on the look-out for +backsheesh, just like his brother officer in an English cathedral; and who, +making us put on straw slippers, so as not to pollute the sacred pavement of +the place, conducted us through it. +</p> + +<p> +It is stupendously light and airy; the best specimens of Norman art that I have +seen (and surely the Crusaders must have carried home the models of these +heathenish temples in their eyes) do not exceed its noble grace and simplicity. +The mystics make discoveries at home, that the Gothic architecture is +Catholicism carved in stone— (in which case, and if architectural beauty is a +criterion or expression of religion, what a dismal barbarous creed must that +expressed by the Bethesda meeting-house and Independent chapels be?)—if, as +they would gravely hint, because Gothic architecture is beautiful, Catholicism +is therefore lovely and right,—why, Mahometanism must have been right and +lovely too once. Never did a creed possess temples more elegant; as elegant as +the Cathedral at Rouen, or the Baptistery at Pisa. +</p> + +<p> +But it is changed now. There was nobody at prayers; only the official beadles, +and the supernumerary guides, who came for backsheesh. Faith hath degenerated. +Accordingly they can’t build these mosques, or invent these perfect forms, any +more. Witness the tawdry incompleteness and vulgarity of the Pasha’s new +temple, and the woful failures among the very late edifices in Constantinople! +</p> + +<p> +However, they still make pilgrimages to Mecca in great force. The Mosque of +Hassan is hard by the green plain on which the Hag encamps before it sets forth +annually on its pious peregrination. It was not yet its time, but I saw in the +bazaars that redoubted Dervish, who is the master of the Hag—the leader of +every procession, accompanying the sacred camel; and a personage almost as much +respected as Mr. O’Connell in Ireland. +</p> + +<p> +This fellow lives by alms (I mean the head of the Hag). Winter and summer he +wears no clothes but a thin and scanty white shirt. He wields a staff, and +stalks along scowling and barefoot. His immense shock of black hair streams +behind him, and his brown brawny body is curled over with black hair, like a +savage man. This saint has the largest harem in the town; he is said to be +enormously rich by the contributions he has levied; and is so adored for his +holiness by the infatuated folk, that when he returns from the Hag (which he +does on horseback, the chief Mollahs going out to meet him and escort him home +in state along the Ezbekieh road), the people fling themselves down under the +horse’s feet, eager to be trampled upon and killed, and confident of heaven if +the great Hadji’s horse will but kick them into it. Was it my fault if I +thought of Hadji Daniel, and the believers in him? +</p> + +<p> +There was no Dervish of repute on the plain when I passed; only one poor wild +fellow, who was dancing, with glaring eyes and grizzled beard, rather to the +contempt of the bystanders, as I thought, who by no means put coppers into his +extended bowl. On this poor devil’s head there was a poorer devil still—a live +cock, entirely plucked, but ornamented with some bits of ragged tape and +scarlet and tinsel, the most horribly grotesque and miserable object I ever +saw. +</p> + +<p> +A little way from him, there was a sort of play going on—a clown and a knowing +one, like Widdicombe and the clown with us,—the buffoon answering with +blundering responses, which made all the audience shout with laughter; but the +only joke which was translated to me would make you do anything but laugh, and +shall therefore never be revealed by these lips. All their humour, my dragoman +tells me, is of this questionable sort; and a young Egyptian gentleman, son of +a Pasha, whom I subsequently met at Malta, confirmed the statement, and gave a +detail of the practices of private life which was anything but edifying. The +great aim of woman, he said, in the much-maligned Orient, is to administer to +the brutality of her lord; her merit is in knowing how to vary the beast’s +pleasures. He could give us no idea, he said, of the wit of the Egyptian women, +and their skill in double entendre; nor, I presume, did we lose much by our +ignorance. What I would urge, humbly, however, is this—Do not let us be led +away by German writers and aesthetics, Semilassoisms, Hahnhahnisms, and the +like. The life of the East is a life of brutes. The much maligned Orient, I am +confident, has not been maligned near enough; for the good reason that none of +us can tell the amount of horrible sensuality practised there. +</p> + +<p> +Beyond the Jack-pudding rascal and his audience, there was on the green a spot, +on which was pointed out to me a mark, as of blood. That morning the blood had +spouted from the neck of an Arnaoot soldier, who had been executed for murder. +These Arnaoots are the curse and terror of the citizens. Their camps are +without the city; but they are always brawling, or drunken, or murdering +within, in spite of the rigid law which is applied to them, and which brings +one or more of the scoundrels to death almost every week. +</p> + +<p> +Some of our party had seen this fellow borne by the hotel the day before, in +the midst of a crowd of soldiers who had apprehended him. The man was still +formidable to his score of captors: his clothes had been torn off; his limbs +were bound with cords; but he was struggling frantically to get free; and my +informant described the figure and appearance of the naked, bound, writhing +savage, as quite a model of beauty. +</p> + +<p> +Walking in the street, this fellow had just before been struck by the looks of +a woman who was passing, and laid hands on her. She ran away, and he pursued +her. She ran into the police-barrack, which was luckily hard by; but the +Arnaoot was nothing daunted, and followed into the midst of the police. One of +them tried to stop him. The Arnaoot pulled out a pistol, and shot the policeman +dead. He cut down three or four more before he was secured. He knew his +inevitable end must be death: that he could not seize upon the woman: that he +could not hope to resist half a regiment of armed soldiers: yet his instinct of +lust and murder was too strong; and so he had his head taken off quite calmly +this morning, many of his comrades attending their brother’s last moments. He +cared not the least about dying; and knelt down and had his head off as coolly +as if he were looking on at the same ceremony performed on another. +</p> + +<p> +When the head was off, and the blood was spouting on the ground, a married +woman, who had no children, came forward very eagerly out of the crowd, to +smear herself with it,—the application of criminals’ blood being considered a +very favourable medicine for women afflicted with barrenness,—so she indulged +in this remedy. +</p> + +<p> +But one of the Arnaoots standing near said, “What, you like blood, do you?” (or +words to that effect). “Let’s see how yours mixes with my comrade’s.” And +thereupon, taking out a pistol, he shot the woman in the midst of the crowd and +the guards who were attending the execution; was seized of course by the +latter; and no doubt to-morrow morning will have HIS head off too. It would be +a good chapter to write—the Death of the Arnaoot—but I shan’t go. Seeing one +man hanged is quite enough in the course of a life. J’y ai ete, as the +Frenchman said of hunting. +</p> + +<p> +These Arnaoots are the terror of the town. They seized hold of an Englishman +the other day, and were very nearly pistolling him. Last week one of them +murdered a shopkeeper at Boulak, who refused to sell him a water-melon at a +price which he, the soldier, fixed upon it. So, for the matter of +three-halfpence, he killed the shopkeeper; and had his own rascally head +chopped off, universally regretted by his friends. Why, I wonder, does not His +Highness the Pasha invite the Arnaoots to a dejeuner at the Citadel, as he did +the Mamelukes, and serve them up the same sort of breakfast? The walls are +considerably heightened since Emin Bey and his horse leapt them, and it is +probable that not one of them would escape. +</p> + +<p> +This sort of pistol practice is common enough here, it would appear; and not +among the Arnaoots merely, but the higher orders. Thus, a short time since, one +of His Highness’s grandsons, whom I shall call Bluebeard Pasha (lest a +revelation of the name of the said Pasha might interrupt our good relations +with his country)— one of the young Pashas being rather backward in his +education, and anxious to learn mathematics, and the elegant deportment of +civilised life, sent to England for a tutor. I have heard he was a Cambridge +man, and had learned both algebra and politeness under the Reverend Doctor +Whizzle, of—College. +</p> + +<p> +One day when Mr. MacWhirter, B.A., was walking in Shoubra Gardens, with His +Highness the young Bluebeard Pasha, inducting him into the usages of polished +society, and favouring him with reminiscences of Trumpington, there came up a +poor fellah, who flung himself at the feet of young Bluebeard, and calling for +justice in a loud and pathetic voice, and holding out a petition, besought His +Highness to cast a gracious eye upon the same, and see that his slave had +justice done him. +</p> + +<p> +Bluebeard Pasha was so deeply engaged and interested by his respected tutor’s +conversation, that he told the poor fellah to go to the deuce, and resumed the +discourse which his ill-timed outcry for justice had interrupted. But the +unlucky wight of a fellah was pushed by his evil destiny, and thought he would +make yet another application. So he took a short cut down one of the garden +lanes, and as the Prince and the Reverend Mr. MacWhirter, his tutor, came along +once more engaged in pleasant disquisition, behold the fellah was once more in +their way, kneeling at the august Bluebeard’s feet, yelling out for justice as +before, and thrusting his petition into the Royal face. +</p> + +<p> +When the Prince’s conversation was thus interrupted a second time, his Royal +patience and clemency were at an end. “Man,” said he, “once before I bade thee +not to pester me with thy clamour, and lo! you have disobeyed me,—take the +consequences of disobedience to a Prince, and thy blood be upon thine own +head.” So saying, he drew out a pistol and blew out the brains of that fellah, +so that he never bawled out for justice any more. +</p> + +<p> +The Reverend Mr. MacWhirter was astonished at this sudden mode of proceeding: +“Gracious Prince,” said he, “we do not shoot an undergraduate at Cambridge even +for walking over a college grass- plot.—Let me suggest to your Royal Highness +that this method of ridding yourself of a poor devil’s importunities is such as +we should consider abrupt and almost cruel in Europe. Let me beg you to +moderate your Royal impetuosity for the future; and, as your Highness’s tutor, +entreat you to be a little less prodigal of your powder and shot.” +</p> + +<p> +“O Mollah!” said His Highness, here interrupting his governor’s affectionate +appeal,—“you are good to talk about Trumpington and the Pons Asinorum, but if +you interfere with the course of justice in any way, or prevent me from +shooting any dog of an Arab who snarls at my heels, I have another pistol; and, +by the beard of the Prophet! a bullet for you too.” So saying he pulled out the +weapon, with such a terrific and significant glance at the Reverend Mr. +MacWhirter, that that gentleman wished himself back in his Combination Room +again; and is by this time, let us hope, safely housed there. +</p> + +<p> +Another facetious anecdote, the last of those I had from a well- informed +gentleman residing at Cairo, whose name (as many copies of this book that is to +be will be in the circulating libraries there) I cannot, for obvious reasons, +mention. The revenues of the country come into the august treasury through the +means of farmers, to whom the districts are let out, and who are personally +answerable for their quota of the taxation. This practice involves an +intolerable deal of tyranny and extortion on the part of those engaged to levy +the taxes, and creates a corresponding duplicity among the fellahs, who are not +only wretchedly poor among themselves, but whose object is to appear still more +poor, and guard their money from their rapacious overseers. Thus the Orient is +much maligned; but everybody cheats there: that is a melancholy fact. The Pasha +robs and cheats the merchants; knows that the overseer robs him, and bides his +time, until he makes him disgorge by the application of the tremendous +bastinado; the overseer robs and squeezes the labourer; and the +poverty-stricken devil cheats and robs in return; and so the government moves +in a happy cycle of roguery. +</p> + +<p> +Deputations from the fellahs and peasants come perpetually before the august +presence, to complain of the cruelty and exactions of the chiefs set over them: +but, as it is known that the Arab never will pay without the bastinado, their +complaints, for the most part, meet with but little attention. His Highness’s +treasury must be filled, and his officers supported in their authority. +</p> + +<p> +However, there was one village, of which the complaints were so pathetic, and +the inhabitants so supremely wretched, that the Royal indignation was moved at +their story, and the chief of the village, Skinflint Beg, was called to give an +account of himself at Cairo. +</p> + +<p> +When he came before the presence, Mehemet Ali reproached him with his horrible +cruelty and exactions; asked him how he dared to treat his faithful and beloved +subjects in this way, and threatened him with disgrace, and the utter +confiscation of his property, for thus having reduced a district to ruin. +</p> + +<p> +“Your Highness says I have reduced these fellahs to ruin,” said Skinflint Beg: +“what is the best way to confound my enemies, and to show you the falsehood of +their accusations that I have ruined them?—To bring more money from them. If I +bring you five hundred purses from my village, will you acknowledge that my +people are not ruined yet?” +</p> + +<p> +The heart of the Pasha was touched: “I will have no more bastinadoing, O +Skinflint Beg; you have tortured these poor people so much, and have got so +little from them, that my Royal heart relents for the present, and I will have +them suffer no farther.” +</p> + +<p> +“Give me free leave—give me your Highness’s gracious pardon, and I will bring +the five hundred purses as surely as my name is Skinflint Beg. I demand only +the time to go home, the time to return, and a few days to stay, and I will +come back as honestly as Regulus Pasha did to the Carthaginians,—I will come +back and make my face white before your Highness.” +</p> + +<p> +Skinflint Beg’s prayer for a reprieve was granted, and he returned to his +village, where he forthwith called the elders together. “O friends,” he said, +“complaints of our poverty and misery have reached the Royal throne, and the +benevolent heart of the Sovereign has been melted by the words that have been +poured into his ears. ‘My heart yearns towards my people of El Muddee,’ he +says; ‘I have thought how to relieve their miseries. Near them lies the +fruitful land of El Guanee. It is rich in maize and cotton, in sesame and +barley; it is worth a thousand purses; but I will let it to my children for +seven hundred, and I will give over the rest of the profit to them, as an +alleviation for their affliction.’” +</p> + +<p> +The elders of El Muddee knew the great value and fertility of the lands of +Guanee, but they doubted the sincerity of their governor, who, however, +dispelled their fears, and adroitly quickened their eagerness to close with the +proffered bargain. “I will myself advance two hundred and fifty purses,” he +said; “do you take counsel among yourselves, and subscribe the other five +hundred; and when the sum is ready, a deputation of you shall carry it to +Cairo, and I will come with my share; and we will lay the whole at the feet of +His Highness.” So the grey-bearded ones of the village advised with one +another; and those who had been inaccessible to bastinadoes, somehow found +money at the calling of interest; and the Sheikh, and they, and the five +hundred purses, set off on the road to the capital. +</p> + +<p> +When they arrived, Skinflint Beg and the elders of El Muddee sought admission +to the Royal throne, and there laid down their purses. “Here is your humble +servant’s contribution,” said Skinflint, producing his share; “and here is the +offering of your loyal village of El Muddee. Did I not before say that enemies +and deceivers had maligned me before the august presence, pretending that not a +piastre was left in my village, and that my extortion had entirely denuded the +peasantry? See! here is proof that there is plenty of money still in El Muddee: +in twelve hours the elders have subscribed five hundred purses, and lay them at +the feet of their lord.” +</p> + +<p> +Instead of the bastinado, Skinflint Beg was instantly rewarded with the Royal +favour, and the former mark of attention was bestowed upon the fellahs who had +maligned him; Skinflint Beg was promoted to the rank of Skinflint Bey; and his +manner of extracting money from his people may be studied with admiration in a +part of the United Kingdom. {3} +</p> + +<p> +At the time of the Syrian quarrel, and when, apprehending some general rupture +with England, the Pasha wished to raise the spirit of the fellahs, and relever +la morale nationale, he actually made one of the astonished Arabs a colonel. He +degraded him three days after peace was concluded. The young Egyptian colonel, +who told me this, laughed and enjoyed the joke with the utmost gusto. “Is it +not a shame,” he said, “to make me a colonel at three-and-twenty; I, who have +no particular merit, and have never seen any service?” Death has since stopped +the modest and good-natured young fellow’s further promotion. The death of—Bey +was announced in the French papers a few weeks back. +</p> + +<p> +My above kind-hearted and agreeable young informant used to discourse, in our +evenings in the Lazaretto at Malta, very eloquently about the beauty of his +wife, whom he had left behind him at Cairo—her brown hair, her brilliant +complexion, and her blue eyes. It is this Circassian blood, I suppose, to which +the Turkish aristocracy that governs Egypt must be indebted for the fairness of +their skin. Ibrahim Pasha, riding by in his barouche, looked like a bluff +jolly-faced English dragoon officer, with a grey moustache and red cheeks, such +as you might see on a field-day at Maidstone. All the numerous officials riding +through the town were quite as fair as Europeans. We made acquaintance with one +dignitary, a very jovial and fat Pasha, the proprietor of the inn, I believe, +who was continually lounging about the Ezbekieh garden, and who, but for a +slight Jewish cast of countenance, might have passed any day for a Frenchman. +The ladies whom we saw were equally fair; that is, the very slight particles of +the persons of ladies which our lucky eyes were permitted to gaze on. These +lovely creatures go through the town by parties of three or four, mounted on +donkeys, and attended by slaves holding on at the crupper, to receive the +lovely riders lest they should fall, and shouting out shrill cries of +“Schmaalek,” “Ameenek” (or however else these words may be pronounced), and +flogging off the people right and left with the buffalo-thong. But the dear +creatures are even more closely disguised than at Constantinople: their bodies +are enveloped with a large black silk hood, like a cab-head; the fashion seemed +to be to spread their arms out, and give this covering all the amplitude of +which it was capable, as they leered and ogled you from under their black masks +with their big rolling eyes. +</p> + +<p> +Everybody has big rolling eyes here (unless, to be sure, they lose one of +ophthalmia). The Arab women are some of the noblest figures I have ever seen. +The habit of carrying jars on the head always gives the figure grace and +motion; and the dress the women wear certainly displays it to full advantage. I +have brought a complete one home with me, at the service of any lady for a +masqued ball. It consists of a coarse blue dress of calico, open in front, and +fastened with a horn button. Three yards of blue stuff for a veil; on the top +of the veil a jar to be balanced on the head; and a little black strip of silk +to fall over the nose, and leave the beautiful eyes full liberty to roll and +roam. But such a costume, not aided by any stays or any other article of dress +whatever, can be worn only by a very good figure. I suspect it won’t be +borrowed for many balls next season. +</p> + +<p> +The men, a tall, handsome, noble race, are treated like dogs. I shall never +forget riding through the crowded bazaars, my interpreter, or laquais-de-place, +ahead of me to clear the way— when he took his whip, and struck it over the +shoulders of a man who could not or would not make way! +</p> + +<p> +The man turned round—an old, venerable, handsome face, with awfully sad eyes, +and a beard long and quite grey. He did not make the least complaint, but slunk +out of the way, piteously shaking his shoulder. The sight of that indignity +gave me a sickening feeling of disgust. I shouted out to the cursed lackey to +hold his hand, and forbade him ever in my presence to strike old or young more; +but everybody is doing it. The whip is in everybody’s hands: the Pasha’s +running footman, as he goes bustling through the bazaar; the doctor’s +attendant, as he soberly threads the crowd on his mare; the negro slave, who is +riding by himself, the most insolent of all, strikes and slashes about without +mercy, and you never hear a single complaint. +</p> + +<p> +How to describe the beauty of the streets to you!—the fantastic splendour; the +variety of the houses, and archways, and hanging roofs, and balconies, and +porches; the delightful accidents of light and shade which chequer them: the +noise, the bustle, the brilliancy of the crowd; the interminable vast bazaars +with their barbaric splendour. There is a fortune to be made for painters in +Cairo, and materials for a whole Academy of them. I never saw such a variety of +architecture, of life, of picturesqueness, of brilliant colour, and light and +shade. There is a picture in every street, and at every bazaar stall. Some of +these our celebrated water-colour painter, Mr. Lewis, has produced with +admirable truth and exceeding minuteness and beauty; but there is room for a +hundred to follow him; and should any artist (by some rare occurrence) read +this, who has leisure, and wants to break new ground, let him take heart, and +try a winter in Cairo, where there is the finest climate and the best subjects +for his pencil. +</p> + +<p> +A series of studies of negroes alone would form a picturebook, delightfully +grotesque. Mounting my donkey to-day, I took a ride to the desolate noble old +buildings outside the city, known as the Tombs of the Caliphs. Every one of +these edifices, with their domes, and courts, and minarets, is strange and +beautiful. In one of them there was an encampment of negro slaves newly +arrived: some scores of them were huddled against the sunny wall; two or three +of their masters lounged about the court, or lay smoking upon carpets. There +was one of these fellows, a straight-nosed ebony- faced Abyssinian, with an +expression of such sinister good-humour in his handsome face as would form a +perfect type of villany. He sat leering at me, over his carpet, as I +endeavoured to get a sketch of that incarnate rascality. “Give me some money,” +said the fellow. “I know what you are about. You will sell my picture for money +when you get back to Europe; let me have some of it now!” But the very rude and +humble designer was quite unable to depict such a consummation and perfection +of roguery; so flung him a cigar, which he began to smoke, grinning at the +giver. I requested the interpreter to inform him, by way of assurance of my +disinterestedness, that his face was a great deal too ugly to be popular in +Europe, and that was the particular reason why I had selected it. +</p> + +<p> +Then one of his companions got up and showed us his black cattle. The male +slaves were chiefly lads, and the women young, well formed, and abominably +hideous. The dealer pulled her blanket off one of them, and bade her stand up, +which she did with a great deal of shuddering modesty. She was coal black, her +lips were the size of sausages, her eyes large and good-humoured; the hair or +wool on this young person’s head was curled and greased into a thousand filthy +little ringlets. She was evidently the beauty of the flock. +</p> + +<p> +They are not unhappy: they look to being bought, as many a spinster looks to an +establishment in England; once in a family they are kindly treated and well +clothed, and fatten, and are the merriest people of the whole community. These +were of a much more savage sort than the slaves I had seen in the horrible +market at Constantinople, where I recollect the following young creature—{2} +(indeed it is a very fair likeness of her) whilst I was looking at her and +forming pathetic conjectures regarding her fate—smiling very good-humouredly, +and bidding the interpreter ask me to buy her for twenty pounds. +</p> + +<p> +From these Tombs of the Caliphs the Desert is before you. It comes up to the +walls of the city, and stops at some gardens which spring up all of a sudden at +its edge. You can see the first Station- house on the Suez Road; and so from +distance-point to point, could ride thither alone without a guide. +</p> + +<p> +Asinus trotted gallantly into this desert for the space of a quarter of an +hour. There we were (taking care to keep our back to the city walls), in the +real actual desert: mounds upon mounds of sand, stretching away as far as the +eye can see, until the dreary prospect fades away in the yellow horizon! I had +formed a finer idea of it out of “Eothen.” Perhaps in a simoom it may look more +awful. The only adventure that befell in this romantic place was that Asinus’s +legs went deep into a hole: whereupon his rider went over his head, and bit the +sand, and measured his length there; and upon this hint rose up, and rode home +again. No doubt one should have gone out for a couple of days’ march—as it was, +the desert did not seem to me sublime, only UNCOMFORTABLE. +</p> + +<p> +Very soon after this perilous adventure the sun likewise dipped into the sand +(but not to rise therefrom so quickly as I had done); and I saw this daily +phenomenon of sunset with pleasure, for I was engaged at that hour to dine with +our old friend J-, who has established himself here in the most complete +Oriental fashion. +</p> + +<p> +You remember J-, and what a dandy he was, the faultlessness of his boots and +cravats, the brilliancy of his waistcoats and kid-gloves; we have seen his +splendour in Regent Street, in the Tuileries, or on the Toledo. My first object +on arriving here was to find out his house, which he has taken far away from +the haunts of European civilisation, in the Arab quarter. It is situated in a +cool, shady, narrow alley; so narrow, that it was with great difficulty— His +Highness Ibrahim Pasha happening to pass at the same moment— that my little +procession of two donkeys, mounted by self and valet-de-place, with the two +donkey-boys our attendants, could range ourselves along the wall, and leave +room for the august cavalcade. His Highness having rushed on (with an affable +and good-humoured salute to our imposing party), we made J.’s quarters; and, in +the first place, entered a broad covered court or porch, where a swarthy tawny +attendant, dressed in blue, with white turban, keeps a perpetual watch. +Servants in the East lie about all the doors, it appears; and you clap your +hands, as they do in the dear old “Arabian Nights,” to summon them. +</p> + +<p> +This servant disappeared through a narrow wicket, which he closed after him; +and went into the inner chambers, to ask if his lord would receive us. He came +back presently, and rising up from my donkey, I confided him to his attendant +(lads more sharp, arch, and wicked than these donkey-boys don’t walk the pave +of Paris or London), and passed the mysterious outer door. +</p> + +<p> +First we came into a broad open court, with a covered gallery running along one +side of it. A camel was reclining on the grass there; near him was a gazelle, +to glad J- with his dark blue eye; and a numerous brood of hens and chickens, +who furnish his liberal table. On the opposite side of the covered gallery rose +up the walls of his long, queer, many-windowed, many-galleried house. There +were wooden lattices to those arched windows, through the diamonds of one of +which I saw two of the most beautiful, enormous, ogling black eyes in the +world, looking down upon the interesting stranger. Pigeons were flapping, and +hopping, and fluttering, and cooing about. Happy pigeons, you are, no doubt, +fed with crumbs from the henne-tipped fingers of Zuleika! All this court, +cheerful in the sunshine, cheerful with the astonishing brilliancy of the eyes +peering out from the lattice-bars, was as mouldy, ancient, and ruinous—as any +gentleman’s house in Ireland, let us say. The paint was peeling off the rickety +old carved galleries; the arabesques over the windows were chipped and +worn;—the ancientness of the place rendered it doubly picturesque. I have +detained you a long time in the outer court. Why the deuce was Zuleika there, +with the beautiful black eyes? +</p> + +<p> +Hence we passed into a large apartment, where there was a fountain; and another +domestic made his appearance, taking me in charge, and relieving the tawny +porter of the gate. This fellow was clad in blue too, with a red sash and a +grey beard. He conducted me into a great hall, where there was a great, large +Saracenic oriel window. He seated me on a divan; and stalking off, for a +moment, returned with a long pipe and a brass chafing-dish: he blew the coal +for the pipe, which he motioned me to smoke, and left me there with a +respectful bow. This delay, this mystery of servants, that outer court with the +camels, gazelles, and other beautiful-eyed things, affected me prodigiously all +the time he was staying away; and while I was examining the strange apartment +and its contents, my respect and awe for the owner increased vastly. +</p> + +<p> +As you will be glad to know how an Oriental nobleman (such as J— undoubtedly +is) is lodged and garnished, let me describe the contents of this hall of +audience. It is about forty feet long, and eighteen or twenty high. All the +ceiling is carved, gilt, painted and embroidered with arabesques, and choice +sentences of Eastern writing. Some Mameluke Aga, or Bey, whom Mehemet Ali +invited to breakfast and massacred, was the proprietor of this mansion once: it +has grown dingier, but, perhaps, handsomer, since his time. Opposite the divan +is a great bay-window, with a divan likewise round the niche. It looks out upon +a garden about the size of Fountain Court, Temple; surrounded by the tall +houses of the quarter. The garden is full of green. A great palm-tree springs +up in the midst, with plentiful shrubberies, and a talking fountain. The room +beside the divan is furnished with one deal table, value five shillings; four +wooden chairs, value six shillings; and a couple of mats and carpets. The table +and chairs are luxuries imported from Europe. The regular Oriental dinner is +put upon copper trays, which are laid upon low stools. Hence J- Effendi’s house +may be said to be much more sumptuously furnished than those of the Beys and +Agas his neighbours. +</p> + +<p> +When these things had been examined at leisure, J- appeared. Could it be the +exquisite of the “Europa” and the “Trois Freres”? A man- -in a long yellow +gown, with a long beard somewhat tinged with grey, with his head shaved, and +wearing on it, first, a white wadded cotton nightcap; second, a red +tarboosh—made his appearance and welcomed me cordially. It was some time, as +the Americans say, before I could “realise” the semillant J- of old times. +</p> + +<p> +He shuffled off his outer slippers before he curled up on the divan beside me. +He clapped his hands, and languidly called “Mustapha.” Mustapha came with more +lights, pipes, and coffee; and then we fell to talking about London, and I gave +him the last news of the comrades in that dear city. As we talked, his Oriental +coolness and languor gave way to British cordiality; he was the most amusing +companion of the club once more. +</p> + +<p> +He has adapted himself outwardly, however, to the Oriental life. When he goes +abroad he rides a grey horse with red housings, and has two servants to walk +beside him. He wears a very handsome grave costume of dark blue, consisting of +an embroidered jacket and gaiters, and a pair of trousers, which would make a +set of dresses for an English family. His beard curls nobly over his chest, his +Damascus scimitar on his thigh. His red cap gives him a venerable and Bey-like +appearance. There is no gewgaw or parade about him, as in some of your +dandified young Agas. I should say that he is a Major-General of Engineers, or +a grave officer of State. We and the Turkified European, who found us at +dinner, sat smoking in solemn divan. +</p> + +<p> +His dinners were excellent; they were cooked by a regular Egyptian female cook. +We had delicate cucumbers stuffed with forced-meats; yellow smoking pilaffs, +the pride of the Oriental cuisine; kid and fowls a l’Aboukir and a la Pyramide: +a number of little savoury plates of legumes of the vegetable-marrow sort: +kibobs with an excellent sauce of plums and piquant herbs. We ended the repast +with ruby pomegranates, pulled to pieces, deliciously cool and pleasant. For +the meats, we certainly ate them with the Infidel knife and fork; but for the +fruit, we put our hands into the dish and flicked them into our mouths in what +cannot but be the true Oriental manner. I asked for lamb and pistachio-nuts, +and cream- tarts au poivre; but J.’s cook did not furnish us with either of +those historic dishes. And for drink, we had water freshened in the porous +little pots of grey clay, at whose spout every traveller in the East has sucked +delighted. Also, it must be confessed, we drank certain sherbets, prepared by +the two great rivals, Hadji Hodson and Bass Bey—the bitterest and most +delicious of draughts! O divine Hodson! a camel’s load of thy beer came from +Beyrout to Jerusalem while we were there. How shall I ever forget the joy +inspired by one of those foaming cool flasks? +</p> + +<p> +We don’t know the luxury of thirst in English climes. Sedentary men in cities +at least have seldom ascertained it; but when they travel, our countrymen guard +against it well. The road between Cairo and Suez is jonche with soda-water +corks. Tom Thumb and his brothers might track their way across the desert by +those landmarks. +</p> + +<p> +Cairo is magnificently picturesque: it is fine to have palm-trees in your +gardens, and ride about on a camel; but, after all, I was anxious to know what +were the particular excitements of Eastern life, which detained J-, who is a +town-bred man, from his natural pleasures and occupations in London; where his +family don’t hear from him, where his room is still kept ready at home, and his +name is on the list of his club; and where his neglected sisters tremble to +think that their Frederick is going about with a great beard and a crooked +sword, dressed up like an odious Turk. In a “lark” such a costume may be very +well; but home, London, a razor, your sister to make tea, a pair of moderate +Christian breeches in lieu of those enormous Turkish shulwars, are vastly more +convenient in the long run. What was it that kept him away from these decent +and accustomed delights? +</p> + +<p> +It couldn’t be the black eyes in the balcony—upon his honour she was only the +black cook, who has done the pilaff, and stuffed the cucumbers. No, it was an +indulgence of laziness such as Europeans, Englishmen, at least, don’t know how +to enjoy. Here he lives like a languid Lotus-eater—a dreamy, hazy, lazy, +tobaccofied life. He was away from evening parties, he said: he needn’t wear +white kid gloves, or starched neckcloths, or read a newspaper. And even this +life at Cairo was too civilised for him: Englishmen passed through; old +acquaintances would call: the great pleasure of pleasures was life in the +desert,—under the tents, with still more nothing to do than in Cairo; now +smoking, now cantering on Arabs, and no crowd to jostle you; solemn +contemplations of the stars at night, as the camels were picketed, and the +fires and the pipes were lighted. +</p> + +<p> +The night-scene in the city is very striking for its vastness and loneliness. +Everybody has gone to rest long before ten o’clock. There are no lights in the +enormous buildings; only the stars blazing above, with their astonishing +brilliancy, in the blue peaceful sky. Your guides carry a couple of little +lanterns which redouble the darkness in the solitary echoing street. Mysterious +people are curled up and sleeping in the porches. A patrol of soldiers passes, +and hails you. There is a light yet in one mosque, where some devotees are at +prayers all night; and you hear the queerest nasal music proceeding from those +pious believers. As you pass the madhouse, there is one poor fellow still +talking to the moon—no sleep for him. He howls and sings there all the +night—quite cheerfully, however. He has not lost his vanity with his reason: he +is a Prince in spite of the bars and the straw. +</p> + +<p> +What to say about those famous edifices, which has not been better said +elsewhere?—but you will not believe that we visited them, unless I bring some +token from them. Here is one:- {2} +</p> + +<p> +That white-capped lad skipped up the stones with a jug of water in his hand, to +refresh weary climbers; and squatting himself down on the summit, was designed +as you see. The vast flat landscape stretches behind him; the great winding +river; the purple city, with forts, and domes, and spires; the green fields, +and palm- groves, and speckled villages; the plains still covered with shining +inundations—the landscape stretches far far away, until it is lost and mingled +in the golden horizon. It is poor work this landscape-painting in print. +Shelley’s two sonnets are the best views that I know of the Pyramids—better +than the reality; for a man may lay down the book, and in quiet fancy conjure +up a picture out of these magnificent words, which shan’t be disturbed by any +pettinesses or mean realities,—such as the swarms of howling beggars, who +jostle you about the actual place, and scream in your ears incessantly, and +hang on your skirts, and bawl for money. +</p> + +<p> +The ride to the Pyramids is one of the pleasantest possible. In the fall of the +year, though the sky is almost cloudless above you, the sun is not too hot to +bear; and the landscape, refreshed by the subsiding inundations, delightfully +green and cheerful. We made up a party of some half-dozen from the hotel, a +lady (the kind soda- water provider, for whose hospitality the most grateful +compliments are hereby offered) being of the company, bent like the rest upon +going to the summit of Cheops. Those who were cautious and wise, took a brace +of donkeys. At least five times during the route did my animals fall with me, +causing me to repeat the desert experiment over again, but with more success. +The space between a moderate pair of legs and the ground, is not many inches. +By eschewing stirrups, the donkey could fall, and the rider alight on the +ground, with the greatest ease and grace. Almost everybody was down and up +again in the course of the day. +</p> + +<p> +We passed through the Ezbekieh and by the suburbs of the town, where the +garden-houses of the Egyptian noblesse are situated, to Old Cairo, where a +ferry-boat took the whole party across the Nile, with that noise and bawling +volubility in which the Arab people seem to be so unlike the grave and silent +Turks; and so took our course for some eight or ten miles over the devious +tract which the still outlying waters obliged us to pursue. The Pyramids were +in sight the whole way. One or two thin silvery clouds were hovering over them, +and casting delicate rosy shadows upon the grand simple old piles. Along the +track we saw a score of pleasant pictures of Eastern life:- The Pasha’s horses +and slaves stood caparisoned at his door; at the gate of one country-house, I +am sorry to say, the Bey’s GIG was in waiting,—a most unromantic chariot; the +husbandmen were coming into the city, with their strings of donkeys and their +loads; as they arrived, they stopped and sucked at the fountain: a column of +red-capped troops passed to drill, with slouched gait, white uniforms, and +glittering bayonets. Then we had the pictures at the quay: the ferryboat, and +the red-sailed river-boat, getting under way, and bound up the stream. There +was the grain market, and the huts on the opposite side; and that beautiful +woman, with silver armlets, and a face the colour of gold, which (the nose-bag +having been luckily removed) beamed solemnly on us Europeans, like a great +yellow harvest moon. The bunches of purpling dates were pending from the +branches; grey cranes or herons were flying over the cool shining lakes, that +the river’s overflow had left behind; water was gurgling through the courses by +the rude locks and barriers formed there, and overflowing this patch of ground; +whilst the neighbouring field was fast budding into the more brilliant fresh +green. Single dromedaries were stepping along, their riders lolling on their +hunches; low sail-boats were lying in the canals; now, we crossed an old marble +bridge; now, we went, one by one, over a ridge of slippery earth; now, we +floundered through a small lake of mud. At last, at about half-a-mile off the +Pyramid, we came to a piece of water some two-score yards broad, where a +regiment of half-naked Arabs, seizing upon each individual of the party, bore +us off on their shoulders, to the laughter of all, and the great perplexity of +several, who every moment expected to be pitched into one of the many holes +with which the treacherous lake abounded. +</p> + +<p> +It was nothing but joking and laughter, bullying of guides, shouting for +interpreters, quarrelling about sixpences. We were acting a farce, with the +Pyramids for the scene. There they rose up enormous under our eyes, and the +most absurd trivial things were going on under their shadow. The sublime had +disappeared, vast as they were. Do you remember how Gulliver lost his awe of +the tremendous Brobdingnag ladies? Every traveller must go through all sorts of +chaffering, and bargaining, and paltry experiences, at this spot. You look up +the tremendous steps, with a score of savage ruffians bellowing round you; you +hear faint cheers and cries high up, and catch sight of little reptiles +crawling upwards; or, having achieved the summit, they come hopping and +bouncing down again from degree to degree,—the cheers and cries swell louder +and more disagreeable; presently the little jumping thing, no bigger than an +insect a moment ago, bounces down upon you expanded into a panting Major of +Bengal cavalry. He drives off the Arabs with an oath,—wipes his red shining +face with his yellow handkerchief, drops puffing on the sand in a shady corner, +where cold fowl and hard eggs are awaiting him, and the next minute you see his +nose plunged in a foaming beaker of brandy and soda-water. He can say now, and +for ever, he has been up the Pyramid. There is nothing sublime in it. You cast +your eye once more up that staggering perspective of a zigzag line, which ends +at the summit, and wish you were up there—and down again. Forwards!—Up with +you! It must be done. Six Arabs are behind you, who won’t let you escape if you +would. +</p> + +<p> +The importunity of these ruffians is a ludicrous annoyance to which a traveller +must submit. For two miles before you reach the Pyramids they seize on you and +never cease howling. Five or six of them pounce upon one victim, and never +leave him until they have carried him up and down. Sometimes they conspire to +run a man up the huge stair, and bring him, half-killed and fainting, to the +top. Always a couple of brutes insist upon impelling you sternwards; from whom +the only means to release yourself is to kick out vigorously and unmercifully, +when the Arabs will possibly retreat. The ascent is not the least romantic, or +difficult, or sublime: you walk up a great broken staircase, of which some of +the steps are four feet high. It’s not hard, only a little high. You see no +better view from the top than you behold from the bottom; only a little more +river, and sand, and ricefield. You jump down the big steps at your leisure; +but your meditations you must keep for after-times,—the cursed shrieking of the +Arabs prevents all thought or leisure. +</p> + +<p> +- And this is all you have to tell about the Pyramids? Oh! for shame! Not a +compliment to their age and size? Not a big phrase,- -not a rapture? Do you +mean to say that you had no feeling of respect and awe? Try, man, and build up +a monument of words as lofty as they are—they, whom “imber edax” and “aquilo +impotens” and the flight of ages have not been able to destroy. +</p> + +<p> +- No: be that work for great geniuses, great painters, great poets! This quill +was never made to take such flights; it comes of the wing of a humble domestic +bird, who walks a common; who talks a great deal (and hisses sometimes); who +can’t fly far or high, and drops always very quickly; and whose unromantic end +is, to be laid on a Michaelmas or Christmas table, and there to be discussed +for half-an-hour—let us hope, with some relish. +</p> + +<p> +* * * +</p> + +<p> +Another week saw us in the Quarantine Harbour at Malta, where seventeen days of +prison and quiet were almost agreeable, after the incessant sight-seeing of the +last two months. In the interval, between the 23rd of August and the 27th of +October, we may boast of having seen more men and cities than most travellers +have seen in such a time:- Lisbon, Cadiz, Gibraltar, Malta, Athens, Smyrna, +Constantinople, Jerusalem, Cairo. I shall have the carpet-bag, which has +visited these places in company with its owner, embroidered with their names; +as military flags are emblazoned, and laid up in ordinary, to be looked at in +old age. With what a number of sights and pictures,—of novel sensations, and +lasting and delightful remembrances, does a man furnish his mind after such a +tour! You forget all the annoyances of travel; but the pleasure remains with +you, through that kind provision of nature by which a man forgets being ill, +but thinks with joy of getting well, and can remember all the minute +circumstances of his convalescence. I forget what sea-sickness is now: though +it occupies a woful portion of my Journal. There was a time on board when the +bitter ale was decidedly muddy; and the cook of the ship deserting at +Constantinople, it must be confessed his successor was for some time before he +got his hand in. These sorrows have passed away with the soothing influence of +time: the pleasures of the voyage remain, let us hope, as long as life will +endure. It was but for a couple of days that those shining columns of the +Parthenon glowed under the blue sky there; but the experience of a life could +scarcely impress them more vividly. We saw Cadiz only for an hour; but the +white buildings, and the glorious blue sea, how clear they are to the +memory!—with the tang of that gipsy’s guitar dancing in the market-place, in +the midst of the fruit, and the beggars, and the sunshine. Who can forget the +Bosphorus, the brightest and fairest scene in all the world; or the towering +lines of Gibraltar; or the great piles of Mafra, as we rode into the Tagus? As +I write this, and think, back comes Rhodes, with its old towers and artillery, +and that wonderful atmosphere, and that astonishing blue sea which environs the +island. The Arab riders go pacing over the plains of Sharon, in the rosy +twilight, just before sunrise; and I can see the ghastly Moab mountains, with +the Dead Sea gleaming before them, from the mosque on the way towards Bethany. +The black gnarled trees of Gethsemane lie at the foot of Olivet, and the yellow +ramparts of the city rise up on the stony hills beyond. +</p> + +<p> +But the happiest and best of all the recollections, perhaps, are those of the +hours passed at night on the deck, when the stars were shining overhead, and +the hours were tolled at their time, and your thoughts were fixed upon home far +away. As the sun rose I once heard the priest, from the minaret of +Constantinople, crying out, “Come to prayer,” with his shrill voice ringing +through the clear air; and saw, at the same hour, the Arab prostrate himself +and pray, and the Jew Rabbi, bending over his book, and worshipping the Maker +of Turk and Jew. Sitting at home in London, and writing this last line of +farewell, those figures come back the clearest of all to the memory, with the +picture, too, of our ship sailing over the peaceful Sabbath sea, and our own +prayers and services celebrated there. So each, in his fashion, and after his +kind, is bowing down, and adoring the Father, who is equally above all. Cavil +not, you brother or sister, if your neighbour’s voice is not like yours; only +hope that his words are honest (as far as they may be), and his heart humble +and thankful. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div class="chapter"> + +<h2><a name="2H_FOOT"></a> +Footnotes:</h2> + +<p> +{1} Saint Paul speaking from the Areopagus, and rebuking these superstitions +away, yet speaks tenderly to the people before him, whose devotions he had +marked; quotes their poets, to bring them to think of the God unknown, whom +they had ignorantly worshipped; and says, that the times of this ignorance God +winked at, but that now it was time to repent. No rebuke can surely be more +gentle than this delivered by the upright Apostle. +</p> + +<p> +{2} Thackeray’s drawing is shown at this point in the book. +</p> + +<p> +{3} At Derrynane Beg, for instance. +</p> + +</div><!--end chapter--> + +<div>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 1863 ***</div> +</body> +</html> + diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. 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