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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/20634-h.zip b/20634-h.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..e85f2c1 --- /dev/null +++ b/20634-h.zip diff --git a/20634-h/20634-h.htm b/20634-h/20634-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..35f2438 --- /dev/null +++ b/20634-h/20634-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,4609 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html + PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" + "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> +<html> +<head> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=US-ASCII" /> +<title>The Sleeping Bard</title> + <style type="text/css"> +/*<![CDATA[ XML blockout */ +<!-- + P { margin-top: .75em; + margin-bottom: .75em; + } + H1, H2 { + text-align: center; + margin-top: 2em; + margin-bottom: 2em; + } + H3, H4 { + text-align: left; + margin-top: 1em; + margin-bottom: 1em; + } + BODY{margin-left: 10%; + margin-right: 10%; + } + TD { vertical-align: top; } + .blkquot {margin-left: 4em; margin-right: 4em;} /* block indent */ + + .smcap {font-variant: small-caps;} + + .pagenum {position: absolute; + left: 92%; + font-size: smaller; + text-align: right; + color: gray;} + + .citation {vertical-align: super; + font-size: .8em; + text-decoration: none;} + // --> + /* XML end ]]>*/ + </style> +</head> +<body> +<h2> +<a href="#startoftext">The Sleeping Bard, by Ellis Wynne</a> +</h2> +<pre> +The Project Gutenberg eBook, The Sleeping Bard, by Ellis Wynne, Translated +by George Borrow + + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + + + + +Title: The Sleeping Bard + or, Visions of the World, Death, and Hell + + +Author: Ellis Wynne + + + +Release Date: February 20, 2007 [eBook #20634] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII) + + +***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SLEEPING BARD*** +</pre> +<p><a name="startoftext"></a></p> +<p>Transcribed from the 1860 John Murray edition by David Price, +email ccx074@pglaf.org. Many thanks to Birmingham Library, +England, for the generous provision of the material from which +this transcription was made. +http://www.birmingham.gov.uk/libraries.bcc.</p> +<h1>THE SLEEPING BARD;<br /> +<span class="smcap">or</span><br /> +Visions of the World, Death, and Hell,<br /> +<span class="smcap">by</span><br /> +ELIS WYN.</h1> +<p style="text-align: center">TRANSLATED FROM THE CAMBRIAN +BRITISH<br /> +<span class="smcap">by</span><br /> +GEORGE BORROW,</p> +<p style="text-align: center"><span class="smcap">author +of</span><br /> +“<span class="smcap">the bible in spain</span>,” +“<span class="smcap">the gypsies of spain</span>,” +<span class="smcap">etc.</span></p> +<p style="text-align: center"><span +class="smcap">london</span>:<br /> +JOHN MURRAY, ALBEMARLE STREET.<br /> +1860.</p> +<h2><!-- page iii--><a name="pageiii"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. iii</span>Preface.</h2> +<p>The Sleeping Bard was originally written in the Welsh +language, and was published about the year 1720. The author +of it, Elis Wyn, was a clergyman of the Cambro Anglican Church, +and a native of Denbighshire, in which county he passed the +greater part of his life, at a place called Y las Ynys. +Besides the Sleeping Bard, he wrote and published a book in +Welsh, consisting of advice to Christian Professors. The +above scanty details comprise all that is known of Elis +Wyn. Both his works have enjoyed, and still enjoy, +considerable popularity in Wales.</p> +<p>The Sleeping Bard, though a highly remarkable, is not exactly +entitled to the appellation of an original work. There are +in the Spanish language certain pieces by Francisco Quevedo, +called “Visions or Discourses;” the principal ones +<!-- page iv--><a name="pageiv"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +iv</span>being “The Vision of the Carcases, the Sties of +Pluto, and the Inside of the World Disclosed; The Visit of the +Gayeties, and the Intermeddler, the Duenna and the +Informer.” With all these the Visions of Elis Wyn +have more or less connection. The idea of the Vision of the +World, was clearly taken from the Interior of the World +Disclosed; the idea of the Vision of Death, from the Vision of +the Carcases; that of the Vision of Hell, from the Sties of +Pluto; whilst many characters and scenes in the three parts, into +which the work of Elis Wyn is divided, are taken either from the +Visit of the Gayeties, the Intermeddler, or others of +Quevedo’s Visions; for example Rhywun, or Somebody, who in +the Vision of Death makes the humorous complaint, that so much of +the villainy and scandal of the world is attributed to him, is +neither more nor less than Quevedo’s Juan de la Encina, or +Jack o’ the Oak, who in the Visit of the Gayeties, is made +to speak somewhat after the following fashion:—</p> +<blockquote><p>“O ye living people, spawn of Satan that ye +are! what is the reason that ye cannot let me be at rest now that +I am dead, and all is over with me? What have I done to +you? What have I done to cause you to defame me in every +thing, who have a hand in nothing, and to blame me for that of +which I am entirely ignorant?” “Who are +you?” said I with a timorous bow, “for I really do +not understand you.” “I am,” said he, +“the unfortunate Juan de la Encina, whom, <!-- page v--><a +name="pagev"></a><span class="pagenum">p. v</span>notwithstanding +I have been here many years, ye mix up with all the follies which +ye do and say during your lives; for all your lives long, +whenever you hear of an absurdity, or commit one, you are in the +habit of saying, ‘Juan de la Encina could not have acted +more like a fool;’ or, ‘that is one of the follies of +Juan de la Encina.’ I would have you know that all +you men, when you say or do foolish things, are Juan de la +Encina; for this appellation of Encina, seems wide enough to +cover all the absurdities of the world.”</p> +</blockquote> +<p>Nevertheless, though there is a considerable amount of what is +Quevedo’s in the Visions of Elis Wyn, there is a vast deal +in them which strictly belongs to the Welshman. Upon the +whole, the Cambrian work is superior to the Spanish. There +is more unity of purpose in it, and it is far less encumbered +with useless matter. In reading Quevedo’s Visions, it +is frequently difficult to guess what the writer is aiming at; +not so whilst perusing those of Elis Wyn. It is always +clear enough, that the Welshman is either lashing the follies or +vices of the world, showing the certainty of death, or +endeavouring to keep people from Hell, by conveying to them an +idea of the torments to which the guilty are subjected in a +future state.</p> +<p>Whether Elis Wyn had ever read the Visions of Quevedo in their +original language, it is impossible to say; the probability +however is, that he was acquainted with them <!-- page vi--><a +name="pagevi"></a><span class="pagenum">p. vi</span>through the +medium of an English translation, which was published in London +about the beginning of the eighteenth century; of the merits of +that translation the present writer can say nothing, as it has +never come to his hand: he cannot however help observing, that a +person who would translate the Visions of Quevedo, and certain +other writings of his, should be something more than a fair +Spanish scholar, and a good master of the language into which he +would render them, as they abound not only with idiomatic +phrases, but terms of cant or Germanía, which are as +unintelligible as Greek or Arabic to the greater part of the +Spaniards themselves.</p> +<p>The following translation of the Sleeping Bard has long +existed in manuscript. It was made by the writer of these +lines in the year 1830, at the request of a little Welsh +bookseller of his acquaintance, who resided in the rather +unfashionable neighbourhood of Smithfield, and who entertained an +opinion that a translation of the work of Elis Wyn, would enjoy a +great sale both in England and Wales. On the eve of +committing it to the press however, the Cambrian Briton felt his +small heart give way within him: “Were I to print +it,” said he, “I should be ruined; the terrible +descriptions of vice and torment, would frighten the genteel part +of the English public out of its wits, and I should to a +certainty be prosecuted by Sir James Scarlett. I am much +obliged to <!-- page vii--><a name="pagevii"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. vii</span>you, for the trouble you have given +yourself on my account—but Myn Diawl! I had no idea +till I had read him in English, that Elis Wyn had been such a +terrible fellow.”</p> +<p>Yet there is no harm in the book. It is true that the +Author is any thing but mincing in his expressions and +descriptions, but there is nothing in the Sleeping Bard which can +give offence to any but the over fastidious. There is a +great deal of squeamish nonsense in the world; let us hope +however that there is not so much as there was. Indeed can +we doubt that such folly is on the decline, when we find +Albemarle Street in ’60, willing to publish a harmless but +plain speaking book which Smithfield shrank from in +’30?</p> +<h2><!-- page 1--><a name="page1"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +1</span>The Vision of the Course of the World.</h2> +<p>One fine evening of warm sunny summer, I took a stroll to the +top of one of the mountains of Wales, carrying with me a +telescope to assist my feeble sight by bringing distant objects +near, and magnifying small ones. Through the thin, clear +air, and the calm and luminous heat, I saw many delightful +prospects afar across the Irish sea. At length, after +feasting my eyes on all the pleasant objects around me, until the +sun had reached his goal in the west, I lay down upon the green +grass, reflecting, how fair and enchanting, from my own country, +the countries appeared whose plains my eyes had glanced over, how +delightful it would be to obtain a full view of them, and how +happy those were who saw the course of the world in comparison +with me: weariness was the result of all this toiling with my +eyes and my imagination, and in the shadow of Weariness, <i>Mr. +Sleep</i> came stealthily to enthrall me, who with his keys of +lead, locked the windows of my eyes, and all my other senses +securely. But it was in vain for him to <!-- page 2--><a +name="page2"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 2</span>endeavour to +lock up the soul, which can live and toil independently of the +body, for my spirit escaped out of the locked body upon the wings +of Fancy, and the first thing which I saw by the side of me was a +dancing ring, and a kind of rabble in green petticoats and red +caps dancing away with the most furious eagerness. I stood +for a time in perplexity whether I should go to them or not, +because in my flurry I feared they were a gang of hungry gipsies, +and that they would do nothing less than slaughter me for their +supper, and swallow me without salt: but after gazing upon them +for some time, I could see that they were better and handsomer +than the swarthy, lying Egyptian race. So I ventured to +approach them, but very softly, like a hen treading upon hot +embers, that I might learn who they were; and at length I took +the liberty of addressing them in this guise, with my head and +back lowered horizontally: “Fair assembly, as I perceive +that you are gentry from distant parts, will you deign to take a +Bard along with you, who is desirous of travelling?” +At these words the hurly-burly was hushed, and all fixed their +eyes upon me: “<i>Bard</i>,” squeaked +one—“<i>travel</i>,” said +another—“<i>along with us</i>,” said the +third. By this time I saw some looking particularly fierce +upon me; then they began to whisper in each others ears certain +secret words, and to look at me; at length the whispering ceased, +and each laying his gripe upon me they raised me upon their +shoulders, as we do a knight of the shire, and then away with me +they flew like the wind, over houses and fields, cities and +kingdoms, seas and mountains; and so quickly did they fly that I +could fasten my sight upon nothing, and what was worse, I began +to suspect that my companions, by their frowning and knitting +their brows at me, wanted me to sing blasphemy against my King +and Maker.</p> +<p><!-- page 3--><a name="page3"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +3</span>“Well,” said I to myself, “I may now +bid farewell to life, these cursed witches will convey me to the +pantry or cellar of some nobleman, and there leave me, to pay +with my neck for their robberies; or they will abandon me stark +naked, to freeze to death upon the sea-brink of old Shire Caer, +<a name="citation3"></a><a href="#footnote3" +class="citation">[3]</a> or some other cold, distant +place;” but on reflecting that all the old hags whom I had +once known had long been dead and buried, and perceiving that +these people took pleasure in holding or waving me over hollow +ravines, I conjectured that they were not witches but beings who +are called fairies. We made no stop until I found myself by +the side of a huge castle, the most beautiful I had ever seen, +with a large pool or moat surrounding it: then they began to +consult what they should do with me; “shall we go direct to +the castle with him?” said one. “No, let us +hang him or cast him into the lake, he is not worth being shown +to our great prince,” said another. “Did he say +his prayers before he went to sleep?” said a third. +At the mention of prayers, I uttered a confused groan to heaven +for pardon and assistance; and as soon as I recollected myself, I +saw a light at a vast distance bursting forth, Oh, how +glorious! As it drew nigh, my companions were darkening and +vanishing, and quickly there came floating towards us a form of +light over the castle, whereupon the fairies abandoned their hold +of me, but as they departed they turned upon me a hellish scowl, +and unless the angel had supported me, I should have been dashed +into pieces small enough for a pasty, by the time I reached the +ground.</p> +<p>“What is your business here?” said the +angel. “In verity my lord,” I replied, “I +do not know what place <i>here</i> is, nor what is my business, +nor what I am myself, nor what has <!-- page 4--><a +name="page4"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 4</span>become of my +other part; I had four limbs and a head, and whether I have left +them at home, or whether the fairies, who have certainly not +acted fairly with me, have cast me into some abyss, (for I +remember to have passed over several horrid ravines,) I cannot +tell, sir, though you should cause me to be hung.” +“Fairly indeed,” said he, “they would have +acted with you, if I had not come just in time to save you from +the clutches of these children of hell.”</p> +<p>“Since you have such a particular desire to see the +course of the <i>little world</i>,” said he, “I have +received commands to give you a sight of it, in order that you +may see your error in being discontented with your station, and +your own country. Come with me,” he added, “for +a peregrination,” and at the word he snatched me up, just +as the dawn was beginning to break, far above the topmost tower +of the castle; we rested in the firmament upon the ledge of a +light cloud to gaze upon the rising sun; but my heavenly +companion, was far more luminous than the sun, but all his +splendour was upward, by reason of a veil which was betwixt him +and the nether regions. When the light of the sun became +stronger, I could see, between the two luminaries, the vast +air-encircled world, like a little round bullet, very far beneath +us. “Look now,” said the angel, giving me a +different telescope from that which I had on the mountain. +When I peeped through this I saw things in a manner altogether +different from that in which I had seen them before, and in a +much clearer one. I saw a city of monstrous size, and +thousands of cities and kingdoms within it; and the great ocean, +like a moat, around it, and other seas, like rivers, intersecting +it.</p> +<p>By dint of long gazing I could see that it was divided into +three exceedingly large streets; each street with a large, <!-- +page 5--><a name="page5"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +5</span>magnificent gate at the bottom, and each gate with a fair +tower over it. Upon each tower there was a damsel of +wonderful beauty, standing in the sight of the whole street; and +the three towers appeared to reach up behind the walls to the +skirts of the castle afore-mentioned. Crossing these three +huge streets I could see another; it was but little and mean in +comparison with them, but it was clean and neat, and on a higher +foundation than the other streets, proceeding upward towards the +east, whilst the three others ran downward towards the north to +the great gates. I now ventured to enquire of my companion +whether I might be permitted to speak. +“Certainly,” said the angel, “speak out! but +listen attentively to my answers, so that I may not have to say +the same thing to you more than once.” “I will, +my lord,” said I. “Now pray, what place is the +castle yonder in the north?” “The castle above +in the air,” said he, “belongs to Belial, prince of +the power of the air, and governor of all the great city below: +it is called Delusive Castle, for Belial is a great deluder, and +by his wiles he keeps under his banner all you see, with the +exception of the little street yonder. He is a great +prince, with thousands of princes under him—what were +Cæsar or Alexander the Great compared with him? What +are the Turk and old Lewis of France, but his servants? +Great, yea, exceeding great, are the power, subtlety, and +diligence of the prince Belial; and his armies in the country +below are innumerable.” “For what +purpose,” said I, “are the damsels standing yonder, +and who are they?” “Softly,” said the +angel, “one question at once: they are there to be loved +and to be adored.” “And no wonder +indeed,” said I, “since they are so amiable; if I +possessed feet and hands as formerly, I would go and offer love +and adoration to them myself.” “Hush, <!-- page +6--><a name="page6"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +6</span>hush,” said he, “if you would do so with your +members, it is well that you are without them; know, thou foolish +spirit, that these three princesses are only three destructive +deluders, daughters of the prince Belial, and all their beauty +and affability, which are irradiating the streets, are only masks +over deformity and cruelty; the three within are like their +father, replete with deadly poison.” +“Woe’s me; is it possible,” said I, quite sad, +and smitten with love of them! “It is but too true, +alas,” said he. “Thou admirest the radiance +with which they shine upon their adorers; but know that there is +in that radiance a very wondrous charm; it blinds men from +looking back, it deafens them lest they should hear their danger, +and it burns them with ceaseless longing for more of it; which +longing, is itself a deadly poison, breeding, within those who +feel it, diseases not to be got rid of, which no physician can +cure, not even death, nor anything, unless the heavenly medicine, +which is called repentance, is procured, to cast out the evil in +time, before it is imbibed too far, by excessive looking upon +them.” “But how is it,” said I, +“that Belial does not wish to have these adorers +himself?” “He has them,” said the angel; +“the old fox is adored in his daughters, because, whilst a +man sticks to these, or to one of the three, he is securely under +the mark of Belial, and wears his livery.”</p> +<p>“What are the names,” said I, “of those +three deceivers?” “The farthest, yonder,” +said he, “is called <i>Pride</i>, the eldest daughter of +Belial; the second is <i>Pleasure</i>; and <i>Lucre</i> is the +next to us: these three are the trinity which the world +adores.” “Pray, has this great, distracted +city,” said I, “any better name than <i>Bedlam the +Great</i>?” “It has,” he replied, +“it is called <i>The City of Perdition</i>.” +“Woe is me,” said I, “are all <!-- page 7--><a +name="page7"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 7</span>that are +contained therein people of perdition?” “The +whole,” said he, “except some who may escape out to +the most high city above, ruled by the king +Emmanuel.” “Woe’s me and mine,” +said I, “how shall they escape, ever gazing, as they are, +upon the thing which blinds them more and more, and which +plunders them in their blindness?” “It would be +quite impossible,” said he, “for one man to escape +from thence, did not Emmanuel send his messengers, early and +late, from above, to persuade them to turn to him, their lawful +King, from the service of the rebel, and also transmit to some, +the present of a precious ointment, called <i>faith</i>, to +anoint their eyes with; and whosoever obtains this <i>true</i> +ointment, (for there is a counterfeit of it, as there is of every +thing else, in the city of Perdition,) and anoints himself with +it, will see his wounds, and his madness, and will not tarry a +minute longer here, though Belial should give him his three +daughters, yea, or the fourth, which is the greatest of all, to +do so.”</p> +<p>“What are those great streets called?” said +I. “Each is called,” he replied, “by the +name of the princess who governs it: the first is the street of +<i>Pride</i>, the middle one the street of <i>Pleasure</i>, and +the nearest, the street of <i>Lucre</i>.” “Pray +tell me,” said I, “who are dwelling in these +streets? What is the language which they speak? What +are the tenets which they hold; and to what nation do they +belong?” “Many,” said he, “of every +language, faith, and nation under the Sun, are living in each of +those vast streets below; and there are many living in each of +the three streets alternately, and every one as near as possible +to the gate; and they frequently remove, unable to tarry long in +the one, from the great love they bear to the princess of some +other street; and the old fox looks slyly on, permitting every +one to love his choice, or <!-- page 8--><a +name="page8"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 8</span>all three if he +pleases, for then he is most sure of him.”</p> +<p>“Come nearer to them,” said the angel, and hurried +with me downwards, shrouded in his impenetrable veil, through +much noxious vapour which was rising from the city; presently we +descended in the street of Pride, upon a spacious mansion open at +the top, whose windows had been dashed out by dogs and crows, and +whose owners had departed to England or France, to seek there for +what they could have obtained much easier at home; thus, instead +of the good, old, charitable, domestic family of yore, there were +none at present but owls, crows, or chequered magpies, whose +hooting, cawing and chattering were excellent comments on the +practices of the present owners. There were in that street, +myriads of such abandoned palaces, which might have been, had it +not been for Pride, the resorts of the best, as of yore, places +of refuge for the weak, schools of peace and of every kind of +goodness; and blessings to thousands of small houses around.</p> +<p>From the summit of this ruin, we had scope and leisure enough +to observe the whole street on either side. There were fair +houses of wondrous height and magnificence—and no wonder, +as there were emperors, kings, and hundreds of princes there, and +thousands of nobles and gentry, and very many women of every +degree. I saw a vain high-topt creature, like a ship at +full sail, walking as if in a frame, carrying about her full the +amount of a pedlar’s pack, and having at her ears, the +worth of a good farm, in pearls; and there were not a few of her +kind—some were singing, in order that their voices might be +praised; some were dancing, to show their figures; others were +painting to improve their complexions; others had been trimming +themselves before the glass, for three hours, learning to smile, +moving pins and making gestures and putting <!-- page 9--><a +name="page9"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 9</span>themselves in +attitudes. There was many a vain creature there, who did +not know how to open her lips to speak, or to eat, nor, from +sheer pride, to look under her feet; and many a ragged shrew, who +would insist that she was as good a gentlewoman as the best in +the street; and many an ambling fop, who could winnow beans with +the mere wind of his train.</p> +<p>Whilst I was looking, from afar upon these, and a hundred +such, behold! there passed by towards us, a bouncing, variegated +lady with a lofty look, and with a hundred folks gazing after +her; some bent themselves as if to adore her; some few thrust +something into her hand. Being unable to imagine who she +was, I enquired. “Oh,” replied my friend, +“she is one who has all her portion in sight, yet you see +how many foolish people are seeking her, and the meanest of them +in possession of all the attainments she can boast of. +<i>She will not have what she can gain</i>, <i>and will never +gain what she desires</i>, and she will speak to no one but her +betters, on account of her mother’s telling her, +‘that a young woman cannot do a worse thing, than be humble +in her love.’” Thereupon came out from beneath +us a pillar of a man, who had been an alderman, and in many +official situations; he came spreading his wings as if to fly, +though he could scarcely draw one knee after the other, on +account of the gout, and various other genteel disorders: +notwithstanding which, you could not obtain from him, but through +a very great favour, a glance or a nod, though you should call +him by his titles and his offices.</p> +<p>From this being I turned my eyes to the other side of the +street, where I beheld a lusty young nobleman, with a number of +people behind him; he had a sweet smile and a condescending air +to every one who met him. “It is strange,” said +I, “that this young man and yonder personage <!-- page +10--><a name="page10"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +10</span>should belong to the same street.” +“Oh, the same princess Pride rules them both,” +answered the angel,—“this young man is only speaking +fair on account of the errand he comes upon; he is seeking +popularity at present, with the intent to raise himself thereby +to the highest office in the kingdom—it is easy for him to +lament to the people how much they are wronged by the oppression +of bad masters; but his own exaltment, and not the weal of the +kingdom, is the heart of the matter.” After gazing +for a long time, I perceived at the gate of Pride, a fair city +upon seven hills, and on the top of its lofty palace there was a +triple crown, with swords and keys crossed. “Lo! +there is Rome,” said I, “and therein dwells the +Pope.” “Yes, most usually,” said the +angel; “but he has a palace in each of the other +streets.” Over against Rome, I could see a city with +an exceedingly fair palace, and upon it was mounted on high, a +half-moon on a banner of gold, and by that I knew that the Turk +was there. Next to the gate after those, was the palace of +Lewis <span class="smcap">xiv.</span>, of France, as I understood +by his arms, three fleurs-de-lis upon a silver banner hanging +aloft. Whilst looking on the height and majesty of these +palaces, I perceived that there was much passing and repassing +from the one to the other, and I asked what was the cause +thereof? “Oh, there is many a dark cause,” said +the angel, “why those three crafty, powerful heads should +communicate; but though they account themselves fully adapted to +espouse the three princesses above, their power and subtlety are +nothing when compared with these; yes, Belial the Great does not +esteem the whole city, (though so numerous be its kings), as +equivalent to his daughters. Notwithstanding that he offers +them in marriage to everybody, he has still never given one +entirely to anybody yet. There <!-- page 11--><a +name="page11"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 11</span>has been a +rivalry between these three concerning them:—the Turk, who +calls himself <i>God upon earth</i>, wished for the eldest, +Pride, in marriage. ‘No,’ said the king of +France, ‘she belongs to me, as I keep all my subjects in +her street, and likewise bring many to her from England and other +countries.’ Spain would have the princess Lucre, in +despite of Holland and all the Jews. England would have the +princess Pleasure, in despite of the Pagans. But the Pope +would have the whole three, and with better reason than all the +rest together, therefore Belial has stationed him next to them in +the three streets.” “And is it on this account +that there is this intercourse at present,” said I. +“No;” he replied, “Belial has arranged the +matter between them for some time; but at present he has caused +them to lay their heads together, how they may best destroy the +cross street yonder, which is the city of Emmanuel, and +particularly one great palace which is there, out of sheer venom +at perceiving that it is a fairer edifice than exists in all the +city of Perdition. Belial moreover has promised to those +who shall accomplish its destruction, the half of his kingdom +during his life, and the whole when he is dead. But, +notwithstanding the greatness of his power and the depth of his +wiles; notwithstanding the multitude of crafty emperors, kings, +and rulers, who are beneath his banner in the vast city of +Perdition; and notwithstanding the bravery of his countless +legions on the outer side of the gates in the world below; +notwithstanding all this,” said the angel, “he shall +see that it is a task above his power to perform. Yes; +however great Belial may be, he shall find that there is One +greater than he, in the little street yonder.”</p> +<p>I was unable to hear his angelic reasons completely, from the +tumbling there was along this slippery street every hour, <!-- +page 12--><a name="page12"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +12</span>and I could see some people with ladders scaling the +tower, and having reached the highest step fall headlong to the +bottom. “To what place are those fools seeking to +get?” said I. “To a place high enough,” +said he; “they are seeking to break into the treasury of +the princess.” “I will warrant it is full +enough,” said I. “It is,” he replied; +“and with every thing which belongs to this street, for the +purpose of being distributed amongst the inhabitants. There +you will find every species of warlike arms to subdue and to +over-run countries; every species of arms of gentility, banners, +escutcheons, books of pedigree, stanzas and poems relating to +ancestry, with every species of brave garments; admirable +stories, lying portraits; all kinds of tints and waters to +embellish the countenance; all sorts of high offices and titles; +and, to be brief, there is every thing there that is adapted to +cause a man to think better of himself, and worse of others than +he ought. The chief officers of this treasury are masters +of ceremonies, vagabonds, genealogists, bards, orators, +flatterers, dancers, tailors, mantua-makers, and the +like.” From this great street we proceeded to the +next, where the princess Lucre reigns; it was a full and +prodigiously wealthy street, yet not half so splendid and clean +as the street of Pride, nor its people half so bold and lofty +looking; for they were skulking mean-looking fellows, for the +most part.</p> +<p>There were in this street thousands of Spaniards, Hollanders, +Venetians, and Jews, and a great many aged, decrepit people were +also there. “Pray, sir,” said I, “what +kind of men are these?” “They have all gain in +view,” said he. “At the lowest extremity, on +one side, you will still see the Pope; also subduers of kingdoms +and their soldiers, oppressors, foresters, shutters up of the +common foot-paths, <!-- page 13--><a name="page13"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 13</span>justices and their bribers, and the +whole race of lawyers down to the catchpole. On the other +side,” said he, “there are physicians, apothecaries, +doctors, misers, merchants, extortioners, usurers, refusers to +pay tithes, wages, rents, or alms which were left to schools and +charity houses; purveyors and chapmen who keep and raise the +market to their own price; shopkeepers (or sharpers) who make +money out of the necessity or ignorance of the buyer; stewards of +every degree, sturdy beggars, taverners who plunder the families +of careless men of their property, and the country of its barley +for the bread of the poor. All these are thieves of the +first water,” said he; “and the rest are petty +thieves, for the most part, and keep at the upper end of the +street; they consist of highway robbers, tailors, weavers, +millers, measurers of wet and dry, and the like.” In +the midst of this discourse, I heard a prodigious tumult at the +lower end of the street, where there was a huge crowd of people +thronging towards the gate, with such pushing and disputing as +caused me to imagine that there was a general fray on foot, until +I demanded of my friend what was the matter. “There +is an exceeding great treasure in that tower,” said the +angel, “and all that concourse is for the purpose of +choosing a treasurer to the princess, in lieu of the Pope, who +has been turned out of that office.” So we went to +see the election.</p> +<p>The men who were competing for the office were the +<i>Stewards</i>, the <i>Usurers</i>, the <i>Lawyers</i>, and the +<i>Merchants</i>, and the richest of the whole was to obtain it, +because the more you have the more you shall crave, is the +epidemic curse of the street. The Stewards were rejected at +the first offer, lest they should impoverish the whole street, +and, as they had raised their palaces on the ruins of their +masters, lest they <!-- page 14--><a name="page14"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 14</span>should in the end turn the princess +out of her possession; then the dispute arose between the three +others; the Merchants had the most silks, the Lawyers most +mortgages on lands, and the Usurers the greatest number of full +bags, and bills and bonds. “Ha! they will not agree +to night,” said the angel, “so come away; the Lawyers +are richer than the Merchants, the Usurers are richer than the +Lawyers, and the Stewards than the Usurers, and Belial than the +whole, for he owns them all, and their property too.”</p> +<p>“For what reason is the princess keeping these thieves +about her?” I demanded. “What can be more +proper,” said he, “when she herself is the arrantest +of thieves.” I was astonished to hear him call the +princess thus, and the greatest potentates thieves of the first +water. “Pray, my lord,” said I, “how can +you call those illustrious people greater thieves than robbers on +the highway?” “You are but a dupe,” said +he; “is not the villain who goes over the world with his +sword in his hand and his plunderers behind him, burning and +slaying, wresting kingdoms from their right owners, and looking +forward to be adored as a conqueror, worse than the rogue who +takes a purse upon the highway? What is the tailor who +cabbages a piece of cloth, to the great man who takes a piece out +of the parish common? Ought not the latter to be called a +thief of the first water, or ten times more a rogue than the +other?—the tailor merely takes snips of cloth from his +customer, whilst the other takes from the poor man the sustenance +of his beast, and by so doing the sustenance of himself and his +little ones—what is taking a handful of flour at the mill, +to keeping a hundred sacksfull to putrify, in order to obtain +afterwards a four-fold price?—what is the half-naked +soldier who takes <!-- page 15--><a name="page15"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 15</span>your garment away with his sword, to +the lawyer, who takes your whole estate from you with a +goose’s quill, without any claim or bond upon it?—and +what is the pickpocket who takes five pounds, to the cogger of +dice who will cheat you of a hundred in the third part of a +night?—and what is the jockey who tricks you in some old +unsound horse, to the apothecary who chouses you of your money, +and your life also with some old unwholesome physic?—and +yet what are all these thieves to the mistress-thief there, who +takes away from the whole all these things, and their hearts and +their souls at the end of the fair?” From this dirty, +disorderly street we proceeded to the street of the princess +Pleasure, in which I beheld a number of Britons, French, +Italians, Pagans, &c. She was a princess exceedingly +beautiful to the eye, with a cup of drugged wine in the one hand, +and a crown and a harp in the other. In her treasury there +were numberless pleasures and pretty things to obtain the custom +of every body, and to keep them in the service of her +father. Yea! there were many who escaped to this charming +street, to cast off the melancholy arising from their losses and +debts in the other streets. It was a street prodigiously +crowded, especially with young people; and the princess was +careful to please every body, and to keep an arrow adapted to +every mark. If you are thirsty, you can have here your +choice of drink; if you love dancing and singing, you can get +here your fill. If her comeliness entice you to lust for +the body of a female, she has only to lift up her finger to one +of the officers of her father, (who surround her at all times, +though invisibly), and they will fetch you a lass in a minute, or +the <i>body</i> of a harlot newly buried, and will go into her in +lieu of a <i>soul</i>, rather than you should abandon so good a +design.</p> +<p><!-- page 16--><a name="page16"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +16</span>Here there are handsome houses with very pleasant +gardens, teeming orchards, and shadowy groves, adapted to all +kinds of secret meetings, in which one can hunt birds and a +certain fair coney; here there are delightful rivers for fishing, +and wide fields hedged around, in which it is pleasant to hunt +the hare and fox. All along the street you could see farces +being acted, juggling going on, and all kinds of tricks of +legerdemain; there was plenty of licentious music, vocal and +instrumental, ballad singing, and every species of merriment; +there was no lack of male and female beauty, singing and dancing; +and there were here many from the street of Pride, who came to +receive praise and adoration. In the interior of the houses +I could see people on beds of silk and down, wallowing in +voluptuousness; some were engaged at billiard-playing, and were +occasionally swearing or cursing the table keeper; others were +rattling the dice or shuffling the cards. My guide pointed +out to me some from the street of Lucre, who had chambers in this +street; they had run hither to reckon their money, but they did +not tarry long lest some of the innumerable tempting things to be +met with here should induce them to part with their pelf, without +usury. I could see throngs of individuals feasting, with +something of every creature before them; oh, how every one did +gorge, swallowing mess after mess of dainties, sufficient to have +feasted a moderate man for three weeks, and when they could eat +no more, they belched out a thanks for what they had received, +and then gave the health of the king and every jolly companion; +after which, they drowned the savour of the food, and their cares +besides, in an ocean of wine; then they called for tobacco, and +began telling stories of their neighbours—and, I observed, +that all the stories were well received, whether true <!-- page +17--><a name="page17"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 17</span>or +false, provided they were amusing and of late date, above all if +they contained plenty of scandal: there they sat, each with his +clay pistol puffing forth fire and smoke, and slander to his +neighbour. At length I was fain to request my guide to +permit me to move on; the floor was impure with saliva and spilt +drink, and I was apprehensive that certain heavy hiccups which I +heard, might be merely the prelude to something more +disagreeable.</p> +<p>From thence we went to a place where we heard a terrible +noise, a medley of striking, jabbering, crying and laughing, +shouting and singing. “Here’s Bedlam, +doubtless,” said I. By the time we entered the den +the brawling had ceased. Of the company, one was on the +ground insensible; another was in a yet more deplorable +condition; another was nodding over a hearthful of battered pots, +pieces of pipes, and oozings of ale. And what was all this, +upon enquiry, but a carousal of seven thirsty neighbours—a +goldsmith, a pilot, a smith, a miner, a chimney-sweeper, a poet, +and a parson who had come to preach sobriety, and to exhibit in +himself what a disgusting thing drunkenness is. The origin +of the last squabble was a dispute which had arisen among them, +about which of the seven loved a pipe and flagon best. The +poet had carried the day over all the rest, with the exception of +the parson, who, out of respect for his cloth, had the most +votes, being placed at the head of the jolly companions—the +poet singing:—</p> +<blockquote><p>“Oh, where are there seven beneath the +sky,<br /> +Who with these seven for thirst can vie?<br /> +But the best for good ale, these seven among,<br /> +Are the jolly divine, and the son of song.”</p> +</blockquote> +<p>Disgusted with these drunken swine, we went nearer to <!-- +page 18--><a name="page18"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +18</span>the gate, to take a peep at the follies of the palace of +<i>Love</i>, the purblind king; it is a place easy to enter and +difficult to escape from, and in it there is a prodigious number +of chambers. In the hall opposite to the door was insane +Cupid, with his two arrows upon his bow, shooting tormenting +poison, which is called <i>bliss</i>. Upon the floor I +could see many fair damsels, finely dressed, walking about, and +behind them a parcel of miserable youths gazing upon their +beauty, and each eager to obtain a glance from his mistress, +fearing her frown far worse than death. One was bending to +the ground and placing a letter in the hands of his goddess; +another a piece of music, all in fearful expectation, like +school-boys showing their tasks to their master; and the damsels +would glance back upon them a smile, to keep up the fervour of +their adorers, but nothing more, lest they should lose their +desire, become cured of their wound and depart. On going +forward to the parlour, I beheld females learning to dance and to +sing, and to play on instruments, for the purpose of making their +lovers seven times more foolish than they were already: on going +to the buttery, I found them taking lessons in delicacy and +propriety of eating: on going to the cellar, I saw them making up +potent love drinks, from nail-parings and the like: on going to +the chambers, we beheld a fellow in a secret apartment, putting +himself into all kinds of attitudes, to teach his beloved elegant +manners; another learning in a glass to laugh in a becoming +manner, without showing to his love too much of his teeth; +another we found embellishing his tale before going to her, and +repeating the same lesson a hundred times. Tired of this +insiped folly, I went to another chamber, where there was a +nobleman, who had sent for a bard from the street of Pride, to +compose a eulogistic strain on his angel, and a <!-- page 19--><a +name="page19"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 19</span>laudatory ode +on himself; the bard was haranguing upon his +talent—“I can,” said he, “compare her to +all the red and white under the sun, and say that her hair is a +hundredfold more yellow than gold; and as for your ode, I can +carry your genealogy through the bowels of an infinity of knights +and princes, and through the waters of the deluge, even as high +up as Adam.” “Lo!” said I, “here is +a bard who is a better inventor than myself.” +“Come away, come away,” said the angel, “these +people are thinking to bamboozle the woman, but when they go to +her, they will be sure to obtain from her as good as they +bring.”</p> +<p>On leaving these people, we caught a glimpse of some cells, +where more obscene practices were going on than modesty will +suffer me to mention, which caused my companion to snatch me away +in wrath, from this palace of whimsicality and wantonness, to the +treasury of the princess, (because we went where we pleased, in +spite of doors and locks.) There we beheld a multitude of +beautiful damsels, all sorts of drink, fruit, and dainties; all +kinds of instruments and books of music, harps, pipes, poems, +carols, &c.; all kinds of games of chance, draught-boards, +dice-boxes, dice, cards, &c.; all kinds of models of banquets +and mansions, figures of men, contrivances and amusements; all +kinds of waters, perfumes, colors and salves to make the ugly +handsome, and the old look young, and to make the harlot and her +putrid bones sweet for a time.</p> +<p>To be brief, there were here all kinds of <i>shadows</i> of +pleasure, all kinds of <i>seeming</i> delight; and to tell the +truth, I believe this place would have ensnared me, had not my +friend, without ceremony, snatched me far away from the three +deceitful towers, to the upper end of the street, and set me down +by a castellated palace of prodigious size, and very agreeable +<!-- page 20--><a name="page20"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +20</span>at first sight, but vile and terribly revolting on the +farthest side, though it was only seen with great difficulty on +the side of its deformity; it had a multitude of doors, and all +the doors were splendid on the outside, but filthy within. +“Pray, my lord,” said I, “if it please you, +what is this wonderful place?” “This,” +said he, “is the palace of another daughter of Belial, who +is called <i>Hypocrisy</i>; she here keeps her school; there is +not a youth or damsel within the whole city, that has not been +her scholar, and the people in general, have so well imbibed what +she has taught, that her lessons have become a second nature, and +intertwined with all their thoughts, words and actions, almost +since the time of their childhood.” After I had +inspected for a time the falsehood of every corner of the +edifice, a procession passed by with a deal of weeping and +groaning, and many men and horses dight in habits of deep +mourning. Presently came a wretched widow, closely muffled, +in order that she might look no more on this vile world; she was +feebly crying, and groaning slowly in the intervals of fainting +fits—verily, I could not help weeping myself, out of +pity. “Pooh, pooh,” said the angel, “keep +your tears for something more worthy; these faintings are only a +lesson of Hypocrisy, and in her great school these black garments +were fashioned. There is not one of these people weeping +seriously; the widow, before the body left the house, had wedded +another man, in her heart; and if she could get rid of the +expense attending the body, she would not care a rush if the soul +of her husband were at the bottom of hell; nor would her +relations, more than herself; because when his disease was +hardest upon him, instead of giving him salutary counsel and +praying fervently, for the Lord to have mercy upon him, they only +talked to him about his effects, and about his testament, or his +pedigree, <!-- page 21--><a name="page21"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 21</span>or what a handsome vigorous man he +had been, and the like; so all this lamenting is mere +sham—some are mourning in obedience to custom and habit, +others for company’s sake, and others for hire.”</p> +<p>Scarcely had this procession passed by, when, lo, another +crowd came in sight. A certain nobleman, prodigiously +magnificient, and his lady at his side, were going along in +state; many respectable men were capping them, and there were a +thousand also behind them, shewing them every kind of submission +and reverence, and by the <i>favours</i>, I perceived that it was +a wedding: “He must be a very exalted nobleman,” said +I, “who merits so much respect from all these +people.” “If you should consider the whole, you +would say something quite different,” said my guide; +“that nobleman is one from the street of Pleasure; and the +female, is a damsel from the street of Pride, and the old man +yonder, who is speaking with him, is one from the street of +Lucre, who has lent money upon nearly all the land of the +nobleman, and is to-day come to settle accounts.” We +drew nigh to hear the conversation.</p> +<p>“Verily, sir,” says the usurer, “I would not +for all I possess, that you should want any thing that I can +offer, in order that you may appear to-day like yourself, +especially since you have met with a lady so amiable and +illustrious as this.” (The subtle old dog knowing +perfectly well what she was all the time.) “By the +Lord above,” said the nobleman, “the next greatest +pleasure, to looking at her beauty, is to listen to your obliging +discourse; I would rather pay you usury than obtain money gratis +from any one else.” “Of a surety, my +lord,” said one of his principal associates, who was called +flatterer, “my uncle shows you no respect but what is fully +your right; but with your permission, I will assert, that he <!-- +page 22--><a name="page22"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +22</span>has not bestowed half the commendation on her ladyship +which she deserves. I cannot myself produce, and I will +defy any man to produce one lovelier than herself, in the whole +street of Pride; nor one more gallant than you, my lord, in the +whole street of Pleasure; nor one more courteous than you, dear +uncle, in the whole street of Lucre.” “Oh, that +is only your good opinion,” replied the lord, “but I +certainly believe that two never came together with more mutual +love than we.” As they proceeded, the crowd +increased, and every one had a fair smile and a low bow for the +other, and forward they ran to meet each other with their noses +to the ground, like two cocks going to engage. “Know +now,” said the angel, “that you have not yet seen a +<i>bow</i> here, nor heard a <i>word</i>, that did not belong to +the lessons of Hypocrisy. There is not here one, after all +this courtesy, that has a farthing’s worth of love for the +other; indeed they are for the most part enemies to one +another. The nobleman here is only a butt amongst them, and +every one has his hit at him. The lady has her mind fixed +upon his <i>grandeur</i> and his <i>nobility</i>, whereby she +hopes to obtain precedence over many of her acquaintances. +The miser has his eye upon his <i>land</i>, for his own son; and +the others, to a man, on the money, which he is to receive as her +portion, because they are all his subjects, that is, his +merchants, his tailors, his shoemakers, or his other tradesmen, +who have arrayed him and maintained him in all this great +splendour, without yet obtaining one farthing, nor any thing but +fair words, and now and then, threats perhaps. Now observe +how many masks, how many twists, Hypocrisy has given to the face +of the truth? He is promising grandeur to his love, having +already disposed of his land; and she is promising portion and +purity, whereas she has no purity, <!-- page 23--><a +name="page23"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 23</span>but purity of +dress, and as for her portion it will not be long in existence, +there being an inveterate cancer in it, even as there is in her +own body.”</p> +<p>“Well, here is a proof,” said I, “that one +never ought to judge by appearances.” +“Yes,” said he, “but come away, and I will show +you something more.” Whereupon he transported me up +to where stood the churches of the city of Perdition, for every +body in it had an appearance of faith, even in the age of +Disbelief. First we went to the temple of Heathenism, where +I could see some adoring the form of a man, others that of the +sun, others that of the moon, and an innumerable quantity of +similar other gods, even down to leek and garlick, and a great +goddess termed <i>Delusion</i>, obtaining general adoration, +although you might see something of the remnants of the Christian +faith amongst some of these people. Thence we went to a +meeting of Dummies, where there was nothing but groaning, and +shivering, and beating the breast. “Though there is +here,” said the angel, “an appearance of repentance +and great submission, there is nothing in reality, but +opinionativeness and obstinacy, and pride, and thick, thick +darkness. Notwithstanding they talk so much about their +<i>internal light</i>, they have not even the spectacle-glasses +of nature which the heathens have, whom you lately +saw.” From these dumb dogs we chanced to turn to a +large church open at the top, with a prodigious number of sandals +<a name="citation23"></a><a href="#footnote23" +class="citation">[23]</a> at the gate, by which I knew that it +was the temple of the Turks; these people had only a dim and +motley colored spectacle glass, which they called the Koran, yet +through this they were always gazing up to the top of the church +for their prophet, who, according to the promise <!-- page +24--><a name="page24"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 24</span>which +he gave them, ought to have returned to them long ago, but has +not yet made his appearance. From there we went to the +church of the Jews, people who had failed to find the way of +escape from the city of Perdition, although they possessed a +pure, clear spectacle glass, on account of a film having come +over their eyes from long gazing, for want of having anointed +them with the precious ointment, <i>faith</i>. We next went +to that of the Papists. “Behold,” said the +angel, “the church which <i>deceiveth the +nations</i>! Hypocrisy has built this church at her own +expense; for the Papists permit, yea enjoin the breaking of any +oath made to a heretic, although it were taken upon the +sacrament.” From the chancel we passed through +key-holes to the upper end of a cell which stood apart, full of +burning candles at mid-day, where we perceived a priest with his +crown shaven, walking about as if he were in expectation of +visitors; presently there came a rotund figure of a woman, and a +very pretty girl behind her, and they went upon their knees +before him to confess their sins. “My spiritual +father,” said the good woman, “I labour under a +burden too heavy to be borne, unless you in your mercy will +lighten it; I married a member of the church of England, +and”—“What,” said the shaven crown, +“married a heretic! married an enemy! there is no pardon +for you, now or ever.” At this word she fainted, and +he vociferated curses at her. “Oh, and what is +worse,” said she when she revived. “I have +killed him!” “O, ho! you have killed him, well +that is something towards obtaining reconciliation with the +church; but I assure you, that unless you had killed him, you +would never have got absolution, nor purgatory, but would have +gone plump to the devil. But where is your offering to the +cloister?” said he, snarling. “Here,” she +replied, and <!-- page 25--><a name="page25"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 25</span>handed him a pretty big purse of +money. “Well,” said he, “I will now make +your peace, and your penance is to remain a widow as long as you +live, lest you should make another bad bargain.” As +soon as she had departed, the damsel came forward to make her +confession. “Your pardon, my father confessor,” +said she, “I have borne a child and murdered +it.” “Very fair, in troth,” said the +confessor, “and who was the father?” +“Verily,” said she, “it was one of your +monastery”—“Hush, hush,” said he, +“no scandal against the men of the church: but where is +your atonement to the church?” “There,” +said she, handing him a gold coin. “You must repent, +and your penance is to watch to night by my bedside,” said +he, smiling archly upon her.</p> +<p>At this moment appeared four other bald-pates, hauling in a +lad to the confessor, the poor fellow looking as pleased as if he +were going to the gallows. “We have brought you a +cub,” said one of the four, “that you may award him a +proper punishment for revealing the secrets of the catholic +church.” “What secrets?” said the +confessor, looking towards a murky cell which was nigh at +hand. “But confess villain, what did you +say?” “In truth,” said the wretch, +“one of my acquaintances asked me, if I had seen the +<i>souls</i> shrieking beneath the altar, <i>on the day of the +festival of the dead</i>? And I said, that I had heard the +voice, but that I had seen nothing.” “Ah, sir, +say the whole,” said one of the others. “But I +added,” said he, “that I had heard that you were only +deceiving us ignorant people, and that instead of souls +shrieking, there were only sea-crabs crackling beneath the +carpet,”—“O son of the fiend! blasphemous +monster!” said the confessor; “but proceed +caitiff.”—“and that it was a wire which turned +the image of saint Peter,” said the fellow, “and <!-- +page 26--><a name="page26"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +26</span>that it was by the wire that the Holy Ghost descended +from the gallery of the cross upon the priest.” +“O heritage of hell!” said the confessor. +“So ho here! take him torturers, and cast him into the +smoky chimney yonder for telling tales.” “Here +you see,” said the angel, “the church which Hypocrisy +desires should be called the Catholic Church, and the members of +which she would fain have the world consider, as the only people +destined to be saved; it must be owned, indeed, that they had the +true spectacle-glass, but they spoiled it by cutting upon the +glass numerous images; and they had true faith, but they mingled +that precious ointment with their own novel inventions, so that +at present they see no more than the heathen.” Thence +we went to a barn, where stood a pert, conceited fellow preaching +with great glibness, frequently repeating the same thing three +times. “This man and his hearers,” said the +angel, “possess the true spectacle-glass, to see the things +which pertain to their peace, but they lack now in their old age, +a very essential matter which is called perfect love. +Various are the causes which drive folks hither; some come out of +respect to their forefathers, some out of ignorance, and many for +worldly advantage. They will make you believe with their +faces that they are being strangled, but they can swallow a toad +if necessary; and thus the princess Hypocrisy does not disdain to +teach some in barns.” “Pray,” said I, +“where now is the <i>Church of England</i>?” +“O,” said he, “in the city high above, it +constitutes a great part of the <i>Catholic Church</i>, and in +the city here below, there are some probationary churches +belonging to it, where the English and Welsh are under probation +for a time, in order to become qualified to have their names +written in the book of the Catholic Church, and they who become +so, <i>blessed are they for ever</i>. But <!-- page 27--><a +name="page27"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 27</span>alas, there +are but very few who are adapting themselves to obtain honour +above; because, instead of looking thitherward, too many suffer +themselves to be blinded by the three princesses below, and +Hypocrisy keeps many with one eye upon the city above, and the +other on that below; yea, Hypocrisy has succeeded in enticing +many from their path, after they have overcome the three other +deceivers. Come in here,” said he, “and you +will see something more;” whereupon he carried me to the +gallery of one of the churches in Wales, the people being in the +midst of the service. And lo! some were whispering, talking +and laughing; some looking upon the pretty women; others were +examining the dress of their neighbours from top to toe; some +were pushing themselves forward and snarling at one another about +rank; some were dozing; others were busily engaged in their +devotions, but many of these were playing a hypocritical +part. “You have not seen yet,” said the angel, +“no, not amongst the infidels, shamelessness as open and +barefaced as this: but thus, alas, we see <i>that the corruption +of the best thing is the corruption worst of +all</i>.” The congregation then proceeded to take the +sacrament, and every one displayed reverential feelings at the +altar.</p> +<p>However, (through the glass of my companion,) I could see one +receiving the bread into his belly, under the figure of a +<i>mastiff</i>, another under that of a <i>swine</i>, another +like a <i>mole</i>, another like a <i>winged serpent</i>, and a +few, O how very few, receiving a ray of celestial light with the +bread and the wine. “Yonder,” said he, +“is a roundhead who is about to become sheriff, and because +the law enjoins, that every one shall receive the communion in +the church before he obtains the office, he has come hither +rather than lose it; but though there are many here who rejoice +at seeing him, there has been no joy <!-- page 28--><a +name="page28"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 28</span>amongst us +for his conversion, for he has only turned for the time; and thus +you see how bold Hypocrisy must be to present herself at the +altar before Emmanuel, who is not to be deceived. But +however great she be in the city of Perdition, she can effect +nothing in the city of Emmanuel, above the wall +yonder.”</p> +<p>Thereupon we turned our faces from the great city of +Perdition, and went up to the other little city. In going +along I could see at the upper end of the streets, many turning +half-way from the temptations of the <i>gates of Perdition</i>, +and seeking for the <i>gate of Life</i>; but whether it was that +they failed to find it, or grew tired upon the way, I could not +see that any went through, except one sorrowful faced man, who +ran forward resolutely, while thousands on each side of him were +calling him fool, some scoffing him, others threatening, him and +his friends laying hold upon him, and entreating him not to take +a step by which he would lose the whole world at once. +“I only lose,” said he, “a very small portion +of it, and if I should lose the whole, pray what loss is +it? For what is there in the world so desirable, unless a +man should desire deceit, and violence, and misery, and +wretchedness, giddiness and distraction. <i>Contentment and +tranquillity</i>,” said he, “constitute the happiness +of man; but in your city there are no such things to be +found. Because who is there here content with his +station? <i>Higher</i>, <i>higher</i>, is what every one +endeavours to be in the street of <i>Pride</i>; give, give us a +little more, says every one in the street of <i>Lucre</i>; sweet, +sweet, pray give me some more of it, is the cry of every one in +the street of <i>Pleasure</i>. And as for tranquillity, +where is it? and who obtains it? If you be a great man, +flattery and envy are killing you; if you be poor, every one is +trampling upon and despising <!-- page 29--><a +name="page29"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 29</span>you; after +having become an inventor, if you exalt your head and seek for +praise, you will be called a boaster and a coxcomb; if you lead a +godly life and resort to the church and the altar, you will be +called a hypocrite; if you do not, then you are an infidel or a +heretic; if you be merry, you will be called a buffoon; if you +are silent, you will be called a morose wretch; if you follow +honesty, you are nothing but a simple fool; if you go neat, you +are proud, if not, a swine; if you are smooth speaking, then you +are false, or a trifler without meaning; if you are rough, you +are an arrogant, disagreeable devil. Behold the world that +you magnify,” said he, “pray take my share of +it.” Whereupon he shook himself loose from them all, +and away he went undauntedly to the narrow gate, and in spite of +every obstacle he pushed his way through, we following him; while +many men dressed in black upon the walls, on both sides of the +gate, kept inviting the man and praising him. +“Who,” said I, “are the men above dressed in +black?” “The watchmen of the king +Emmanuel,” replied the angel, “who, in the name of +their master, are inviting people and assisting them through this +gate.”</p> +<p>By this time we were by the gate; it was very low and narrow, +and mean in comparison with the lower gates. On the two +sides of the door were the <i>ten commandments</i>; upon the +first slab on the right side was written, “<i>love the Lord +with thy whole heart</i>, <i>&c.</i>,” and upon the +second slab on the other side, “love thy neighbour as +thyself;” and above the whole, “<i>love not the world +nor the things which are therein</i>.” I had not +looked long before the watchmen began to cry out to the men of +Perdition, “Flee! flee, for your lives!” Only a +very few turned towards them once, some of whom asked, +“flee from what?” “From the prince of +this world, who reigns in the <!-- page 30--><a +name="page30"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 30</span>children of +disobedience,” said the watchman; “flee from the +pollutions which are in the world through the lusts of the flesh, +the lusts of the eyes, and the vanities of life; flee from the +wrath which is coming to overwhelm you!” +“What,” exclaimed the other watchman, “is your +beloved city but a vast glowing roof cast over Hell, and if you +were here, you might see the fire on the farther side of your +walls kindling, to burn you down into Hell.” Some +mocked them, others threatened to stone them unless they ceased +their unmannerly prate; but some few asked, “whither shall +we fly?” “Hither,” said the watchman, +“fly hither to your lawful king, who yet offers you pardon +through us, if you return to your obedience, and abandon the +rebel Belial and his deceitful daughters. Though their +appearance is so splendid, it is only deception; Belial at home +is but a very poor prince, he has only you for fuel, and only you +as roast and boiled to gnaw, and you are never sufficient, and +there will never be an end to his hunger and your torments. +And who would serve such a malicious butcher, in a temporary +delirium here, and in eternal torments hereafter, who could +obtain a life of happiness under a king merciful and charitable +to his subjects, who is ever doing towards them the good offices +of a shepherd, and endeavouring to keep them from Belial, in +order finally to give to each of them the kingdom in the country +of Light? O fools! will ye take the horrible enemy whose +throat is burning with thirst for your blood, instead of the +compassionate prince who has given his own blood to assist +you?” But it did not appear that these reasonings, +which were sufficient to soften a rock, proved of much advantage +to them, and the principal cause of their being so unsuccessful +was, that not many had leisure to hear, the greater part being +employed in looking at the <!-- page 31--><a +name="page31"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 31</span>gates; and of +those who did hear, there were not many who heeded, and of those +there were not many who long remembered; some would not believe +that it was Belial whom they were serving, others could not +conceive that yonder little, untrodden passage was the gate of +Life, and would not believe that the three other glittering gates +were delusion, the castle preventing them from seeing their +destruction till they rushed upon it.</p> +<p>At this moment there came a troop of people from the street of +Pride, and knocked at the gate with great confidence but they +were all so stiffnecked, that they could never go into a place so +low, without soiling their perriwigs and their plumes, so they +walked back in great ill humour. At the tail of these came +a party from the street of Lucre. Said one, “is this +the gate of Life?” “Yea,” replied the +watchmen who were above. “What is to be done,” +said he, “in order to pass through?” +“Read on each side of the door, and you will +learn.” The miser read the ten commandments. +“Who,” he cried, “will say, that I have broken +one of these?” But on looking aloft and seeing, +“<i>love not the world</i>, <i>nor the things that are +therein</i>,” he started, and could not swallow that +difficult sentence. There was among them an envious +pig-tail who turned back on reading, “<i>love thy neighbour +as thyself</i>;” and a perjurer, and a slanderer turned +abruptly back on reading, “<i>bear not false +witness</i>;” some physicians on reading, “<i>thou +shalt commit no murder</i>,” exclaimed “this is no +place for us.” To be brief, every one saw there +something which troubled him, so they all went back to chew the +cud. I may add, that there was not one of these people, but +had so many bags and writings stuck about him, that he could +never have gone through a place so narrow, even if he had made +the attempt.</p> +<p><!-- page 32--><a name="page32"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +32</span>Presently there came a drove from the street of Pleasure +walking towards the gate. “Please to inform +us,” said one to the watchman, “to what place this +road is leading?” “This is the road,” +said the watchman, “which leads to eternal joy and +happiness;” whereupon they all strove to get through, but +they failed, for some had too much belly for a place so narrow; +others were too weak to push, having been enfeebled by women, who +impeded them moreover with their foolish whims. +“O,” said the watchman who was looking upon them, +“it is of no use for you to attempt to go through with your +vain toys; you must leave your pots, and your dishes, and your +harlots, and all your other ware behind you, and then make +haste.” “How should we live then?” said +the fiddler, who would have been through long ago, but for fear +of breaking his instrument. “O,” said the +watchman, “you must take the word of the king, for sending +you whatsover things may be for your advantage.” +“Hey, hey,” said one, “<i>a bird in the hand is +worth two in the bush</i>;” and thereupon they all +unanimously turned back.</p> +<p>“Come through now,” said the angel, and he drew me +in, and the first thing I saw in the porch was a large baptismal +font, and by the side of it a spring of saline water. +“Why is this here at the entrance of the road?” said +I. “It is here,” said the angel, “because +every one must wash himself therein, previous to obtaining honour +in the palace of Emmanuel; it is termed the <i>fountain of +repentance</i>.” Above I could see written, +“<i>this is the gate of the Lord</i>, &c.” +The porch and also the street expanded, and became less difficult +as one went forward. When we had gone a little way up the +street I could hear a soft voice behind me saying, “<i>this +is the road</i>, <i>walk in it</i>.” The street was +up-hill but was very clean and straight, and though the houses +were lower here than in the city of <i>Perdition</i>, yet they +were more pleasant. If there is <!-- page 33--><a +name="page33"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 33</span>here less +wealth, there is also less strife and care; if there are fewer +dishes, there are fewer diseases; if there is less noise, there +is also less sadness, and more pure joy. I was surprised at +the calmness and the delightful tranquillity that reigned here, +so little resembling what I had found below. Instead of +swearing and cursing, buffoonery, debauchery, and drunkenness; +instead of pride and vanity, torpor in the one corner, and riot +in the other; instead of all the loud broiling, and the boasting +and bustling, and chattering, which were incessantly stupifying a +man yonder; and instead of the numberless constant evils to be +found below, you here saw sobriety, affability and cheerfulness, +peace and thankfulness, clemency, innocence, and content upon the +face of every body. No weeping here, except for the +pollutions pervading the city of the enemy; no hatred or anger, +except against sin; and that same hatred and anger against sin, +always accompanied with a certainty of being able to subdue it; +no fear but of incensing the King, who was ever more ready to +forgive than be angry with his subjects; and here there was no +sound but of psalms of praise to the heavenly guardian.</p> +<p>By this time we had come in sight of a building superlatively +beautiful. O, how glorious it was! No one in the city +of Perdition—neither the Turk nor the Mogul, nor any of the +others, possessed any thing equal to it. “Behold the +<i>Catholic Church</i>!” said the angel. “Is it +here that Emmanuel keeps his court?” said I. +“Yes,” he replied, “this is his only +terrestrial palace.” “Has he any crowned heads +under him?” said I. “A few,” was the +answer. “There are your good queen Anne, and some +princes of Denmark and Germany, and a few of the other small +princes.” “What are they,” said I, +“compared with those who are under Belial the Great? +He has emperors <!-- page 34--><a name="page34"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 34</span>and kings without +number.” “Notwithstanding all this;” said +the angel, “not one of them can move a finger without the +permission of Emmanuel, nor Belial himself either, because +Emmanuel is his lawful king; Belial rebelled, and for his +rebellion was made a captive, with permission however to visit +for a little time the city of Perdition, and delude any one he +could into his own rebellion and a share of his punishment. +So great is his malice, that he is continually using this +permission, though aware that by so doing he will only add to his +own misery; and so great is his love of wickedness, that he takes +advantage of his half liberty, to seek to destroy this city and +this edifice, though he has long known that their guardian is +invincible.”</p> +<p>“Pray, my lord,” said I, “may we approach +and take a more minute view of this magnificent palace?” +for my heart had warmed towards the place at the first +sight. “Certainly you may,” said the angel, +“because there I have my place, charge, and +employment.” The nearer we went to it, the more I +wondered, seeing how lofty, strong, beautiful, pure, and lovely +every part of it was; how accurate was the workmanship, and how +fair were its materials. A rock wrought with immense +labour, and of prodigious strength was the foundation stone; +living stones were placed upon this rock, and were cemented in so +admirable a manner, that it was impossible for one stone to be so +beautiful in another place, as it was in its own. I could +see one part of the <i>church</i> which cast out a very fair and +remarkable cross, and the angel perceiving me gazing upon it +asked me “if I knew that part.” I did not know +what to answer. “That is the <i>Church of +England</i>,” said he. These words made me observe it +with more attention than before, and on looking up I could <!-- +page 35--><a name="page35"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +35</span>perceive queen Anne, on the pinnacle of the building, +with a sword in each hand. With the one in her left, which +is called Justice, she preserves her subjects from the men of the +city of Perdition; and with the other in her right, which is the +sword of the Spirit, or the word of God, she preserves them from +Belial and his spiritual evils. Under the left sword were +the <i>Laws of England</i>; under the other was a large +<i>Bible</i>. The sword of the Spirit was fiery and of +prodigious length, it would kill at a distance to which the other +sword could not reach. I observed the other princes with +the same arms, defending their portions of the church; but I +could see that the portion of my queen was the fairest, and that +her arms were the most bright. By her right hand, I could +see a multitude of people in black—archbishops, bishops, +and teachers, assisting her in sustaining the sword of the +Spirit; and some of the soldiers and civil officers, and a few, +very few of the lawyers, supporting, along with her, the other +sword. I obtained permission to rest a little by one of the +magnificent doors, whither people were coming to obtain the +dignity of the <i>universal church</i>; a tall angel was keeping +the door, and the church within side was so vividly light, that +it was useless for <i>Hypocrisy</i> to show her visage +there—she sometimes appeared at the door, but never went +in. After I had been gazing about a quarter of an hour, +there came a <i>papist</i>, who imagined that the Pope possessed +the catholic church, and he claimed his share of dignity. +“What proof of your dignity have you?” said the +porter. “I have plenty,” said he, “of +<i>traditions of the fathers</i>, and <i>acts of the congresses +of the church</i>; but what further assurance do I need, than the +word of the Pope, who sits upon the infallible +chair?” Then the porter proceeded to open an +exceedingly large Bible. “Behold,” <!-- page +36--><a name="page36"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 36</span>said +he, “the only Statute Book which we use here, prove your +claim out of that, or depart;” whereupon he departed.</p> +<p>At this moment there came a drove of Quakers, who wanted to go +in with their hats upon their heads, but they were turned back +for their unmannerly behaviour. After that, some of the +children of the barn, who had been there for some time, began to +speak. “We have,” said they, “no other +statute than you, therefore show us our dignity.” +“Stay,” said the glittering porter, looking them +fixedly in the face, “and I will show you something. +Do you see yonder,” said he, “the rent which you made +in the church, that you might go out of it, without the slightest +cause or reason? and now, what do you want here? Go back to +the narrow gate, wash yourselves well in the fountain of +repentance, in order to free yourselves from some of the kingly +blood, in which you steeped yourselves formerly; bring some of +that water to moisten the clay, to close up the rent yonder, and +then, and then only, you shall be welcome.” But +before we had proceeded a rood farther towards the west, we heard +a buzz amongst the princes above, and every one, great and small, +seized his arms, and proceeded to harness himself as if for +battle; and before we had time to espy a place to flee to, the +whole air became dark, and the city was more deeply over-shadowed +than during an eclipse; the thunder began to roar, and the +lightnings to dart forkedly, and a ceaseless shower of mortal +arrows, was directed from the gates below, against the catholic +church; and unless every one had had a shield in his hand to +receive the fiery darts, and unless the foundation stone had been +too strong for any thing to make an impression upon it, you would +have seen the whole in conflagration. But alas! this was +but the prologue, or a foretaste of what was to follow; for the +darkness <!-- page 37--><a name="page37"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 37</span>speedily became seven times blacker, +and <i>Belial</i> himself appeared upon the densest cloud, and +around him were his choicest warriors, both terrestrial and +infernal, to receive and execute his will, on their particular +sides. He had enjoined the Pope, and the king of France, +his other son, to destroy the church of England and its queen; +and the Turk and the Muscovite, to break to pieces the other +parts of the Church, and to slay the people; the queen and the +other princes, were by no means to be spared; and the Bible was +to be burned in spite of every thing. The first thing which +the queen and the other saints did, was to fall upon their knees, +and complain of their wrongs to the King of kings, in these +words:—“<i>The spreading of his wings covereth the +extent of thy land</i>, <i>O Emmanuel</i>!” Isaiah 8. +iii. This complaint was answered by a voice, which said, +“<i>resist the devil and he will flee from you</i>;” +and then ensued the hardest and most stubborn engagement, which +had ever been upon the earth. When the <i>sword of the +Spirit</i> began to be waved, Belial and his infernal legions +began to retreat, and the Pope to falter. The king of +France, it is true, held out; yet even he nearly lost heart, for +he saw the queen and her subjects united and prosperous, whilst +his own ships were sunk, his soldiers slaughtered, and thousands +of his subjects rebelling. The very Turk was becoming as +gentle as a lamb; but just at that moment my heavenly associate +quitted me, darting up towards the firmament, to myriads of other +shining powers, and my dream was at an end. Yes, just as +the Pope and the other terrestrial powers, were beginning to +sneak away, and to faint, and the potentates of hell to fall by +tens of thousands, each making, to my imagination’s ear, as +much noise as if a huge mountain had been precipitated into the +depths of the sea, my companion quitted me, and <!-- page 38--><a +name="page38"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 38</span>there was an +end of my dream; for what with the noise made by the fiends, and +the agitation which I felt at losing my companion, I awoke from +my sleep, and returned with the utmost reluctance to my sluggish +clod, thinking how noble and delightful it was to be a +<i>free</i> spirit, to wander about in angelic company, quite +secure, though seemingly in the midst of peril. I had now +nothing to console me, save the Muse, and she being half angry, +would do nothing more than bleat to me the following strains.</p> +<h3>The Perishing World.</h3> +<p>O man, upon this building gaze,<br /> +The mansion of the human race,<br /> +The world terrestrial see!<br /> +Its architect’s the King on high,<br /> +Who ne’er was born and ne’er will die—<br /> +The blest Divinity.<br /> +The world, its wall, its starlights all,<br /> +Its stores, where’er they lie,<br /> +Its wondrous brute variety,<br /> +Its reptiles, fish, and birds that fly,</p> +<p><!-- page 39--><a name="page39"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +39</span>And cannot number’d be,<br /> +The God above, to show his love,<br /> +Did give, O man, to thee.<br /> +For man, for man, whom he did plan,<br /> +God caus’d arise<br /> +This edifice,<br /> +Equal to heaven in all but size,<br /> +Beneath the sun so fair;<br /> +Then it he view’d, and that ’twas good<br /> +For man, he was aware.</p> +<p>Man only sought to know at first<br /> +Evil, and of the thing accursed<br /> +Obtain a sample small.<br /> +The sample grew a giantess,<br /> +’Tis easy from her size to guess<br /> +The whole her prey will fall.<br /> +Cellar and turret high,<br /> +Through hell’s dark treachery,<br /> +Now reeling, rocking terribly,<br /> +In swooning pangs appear;<br /> +The orchards round, are only found<br /> +Vile sedge and weeds to bear;<br /> +The roof gives way, more, more each day,<br /> +The walls too, spite<br /> +Of all their might,<br /> +Have frightful cracks, down all their height,<br /> +Which coming ruin show;<br /> +The dragons tell, that danger fell,<br /> +Now lurks the house below.</p> +<p><!-- page 40--><a name="page40"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +40</span>O man! this building fair and proud,<br /> +From its foundation to the cloud,<br /> +Is all in dangerous plight;<br /> +Beneath thee quakes and shakes the ground;<br /> +’Tis all, e’en down to hell’s profound,<br /> +A bog that scares the sight.<br /> +The sin man wrought, the deluge brought,<br /> +And without fail<br /> +A fiery gale,<br /> +Before which every thing shall quail,<br /> +His deeds shall waken now;<br /> +Worse evermore, till all is o’er,<br /> +Thy case, O world, shall grow.<br /> +There’s one place free, yet, man for thee,<br /> +Where mercies reign,<br /> +A place to which thou may’st attain,<br /> +Seek there a residence to gain<br /> +Lest thou in caverns howl;<br /> +For save thou there shalt quick repair,<br /> +Woe to thy wretched soul!</p> +<p>Towards yon building turn your face!<br /> +Too strong by far is yonder place<br /> +To lose the victory.<br /> +’Tis better than the reeling world;<br /> +For all the ills by hell uphurl’d<br /> +It has a remedy.<br /> +Sublime it braves the wildest waves;<br /> +It is a refuge place<br /> +Impregnable to Belial’s race,<br /> +With stones, emitting vivid rays,<br /> +<!-- page 41--><a name="page41"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +41</span>Above its stately porch;<br /> +Itself, and those therein, compose<br /> +The universal church.<br /> +Though slaves of sin we long have been,<br /> +With faith sincere<br /> +We shall win pardon there;<br /> +Then in let’s press, O, brethren dear,<br /> +And claim our dignity!<br /> +By doing so, we saints below<br /> +And saints on high shall be.</p> +<h2><!-- page 43--><a name="page43"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +43</span>A Vision of Death in his Palace Below.</h2> +<p>In one of the long, black, chilly nights of winter, when it +was much warmer in a kitchen of Glyn-cywarch, than on the summit +of Cadair Idris, and much more pleasant to be in a snug chamber, +with a warm bed-fellow, than in a shroud in the church yard, I +was mussing upon some discourses which had passed between me and +a neighbour, upon <i>the shortness of human life</i>, and how +certain every one is of dying, and how uncertain as to the +time. Whilst thus engaged, having but newly laid my head +down upon the pillow, and being about half awake, I felt a great +weight coming stealthily upon me, from the crown of my head to my +heel, so that I could not stir a finger, nor any thing except my +tongue, and beheld a lad upon my breast, and a lass mounted upon +his back. On looking sharply, I guessed, from the warm +smell which came from him, his clammy locks, and his gummy eyes, +that the lad must be <i>master Sleep</i>. “Pray, +sir,” said I, squealing, “what have I done to you, +that you bring that witch here to suffocate me?” +“Hush,” said he, “it is only my sister +<i>Nightmare</i>; <!-- page 44--><a name="page44"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 44</span>we are both going to visit our +brother <i>Death</i>, and have need of a third, and lest you +should resist, we have come upon you without warning, as he +himself will sometime; therefore you must come, whether you will +or not.” “Alas!” said I, “must I +die?” “O no,” said <i>Nightmare</i>; +“we will spare you this time.” “But with +your favour,” said I, “your brother Death never +spared any one yet who was brought within reach of his dart; the +fellow even ventured to fling a fall with the Lord of Life +himself, though it is true he gained very little by his +daring.” At these words <i>Nightmare</i> arose full +of wrath and departed. “Hey,” said +<i>Sleep</i>, “come away, and you shall have no cause to +repent of your journey.” “Well,” said I, +“may there never be night to <i>saint Sleep</i>, and may +<i>Nightmare</i> never obtain any other place to crouch upon than +the top of an awl, unless you return me to where you found +me.” Then away he went with me, over woods and +precipices, over oceans and valleys, over castles and towers, +rivers and crags; and where did we descend, but by one of the +gates of the daughters of Belial, on the posterior side of the +<i>city of Perdition</i>, and I could there perceive, that the +three gates of Perdition contracted into one on the hinder side, +and opened into the same place—a place foggy, cold, and +pestilential, replete with an unwholesome vapour, and clouds, +lowering and terrible. “Pray, sir,” said I, +“what dungeon of a place is this?” +“<i>The chambers of Death</i>,” said +<i>Sleep</i>. I had scarcely time to enquire, before I +heard some people crying, some screaming, some groaning, some +talking deliriously, some uttering blasphemies in a feeble tone: +others in great agony, as if about to give up the ghost. +Here and there one, after a mighty shout would become silent, and +then forthwith I could hear a key revolving in a lock; I <!-- +page 45--><a name="page45"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +45</span>turned at the sound to look for the door, and by dint of +long gazing, I could see tens of thousands of doors, apparently +far off though close by my side notwithstanding. +“Please to inform me, master Sleep,” said I, +“to what place these doors open?” “They +open,” he replied, “into the <i>land of Oblivion</i>, +a vast country under the rule of my brother Death; and the great +wall here, is the limit of the immense eternity.” As +I looked I could see a little death at each door, all with +different arms, and different names, though evidently they were +all subjects of the same king. Notwithstanding which, there +was much contention between them concerning the sick; for the one +wished to snatch the sick through his door, and the other would +fain have him through his own. On drawing near, we could +see above every door, the name of the death written, who kept it; +and likewise by every door, hundreds of various things left +scattered about, denoting the haste of those who went +through. Over one door I could see <i>Famine</i>, though +purses and full bags were lying on the ground beside it, and +boxes nailed up, standing near. “That,” said +he, “is the gate of the <i>misers</i>.” +“To whom,” said I, “do these rags +belong?” “Principally to misers,” he +replied; “but there are some there belonging to lazy +idlers, and to ballad singers, and to others, poor in every +thing, but spirit, who preferred starvation to +begging.” In the next door was the death of the +<i>Ruling Passion</i>, and parallel with it I could hear many +voices, as of men in the extremity of cold. By this door +were many books, some pots and flaggons, here and there a staff +and a walking stick, some compasses and charts, and shipping +tackle. “This is the road by which scholars +go,” said I. “Some scholars go by it,” +said he, “solitary, helpless wretches, whose relations have +stripped them of their last <!-- page 46--><a +name="page46"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 46</span>article of +raiment; but people of various other descriptions go by it +also. Those,” said he, (speaking of the pots,) +“are the relics of jolly companions, whose feet are +freezing under benches, whilst their heads are boiling with drink +and uproar; and the things yonder belong to travellers of snowy +mountains, and to traffickers in the North sea.”</p> +<p>Next at hand was a meagre skeleton of a figure, called the +<i>death of Fear</i>. Through his exterior you might see +that he did not possess any heart; and by his door there were +bags, and chests also, and locks and castles. By this gate +went usurers, bad governors and tyrants, and some of the +murderers, but the plurality of the latter were driven past to +the next gate, where there was a death called <i>Gallows</i>, +with his cord ready for their necks.</p> +<p>Next was to be seen the <i>death of Love</i>, and by his feet +were hundreds of instruments, and books of music, and verses, and +love letters, and also ointments and colors to beautify the +countenance, and a thousand other embellishing wares, and also +some swords. “With some of those swords,” said +my companion, “bandits have been slain whilst fighting for +women, and with others, love-lorn creatures have stabbed +themselves.” I could perceive that this death was +purblind.</p> +<p>At the next door, was a death who had the most repulsive +figure of all: his entire liver was consumed. He was called +the <i>death of Envy</i>. “This one,” said +Sleep, “assaults losing gamesters, slanderers, and many a +female rider, who repineth at the law which rendered the wife +subject to her husband.” “Pray, sir,” +said I, “what is the meaning of female rider?” +“Female rider,” said he, “is the term used +here, for the woman who would ride her husband, her neighbours, +<!-- page 47--><a name="page47"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +47</span>and her country too, if possible, and the end of her +long riding will be, that she will ride the Devil, from that +door, down to hell.”</p> +<p>Next stood the door of the <i>death of Ambition</i>, and of +those who lift their nostrils on high, and break their shins for +want of looking beneath their feet. Beside this door were +crowns, sceptres, banners, all sorts of patents and commissions, +and all kinds of heraldric and warlike arms.</p> +<p>But before I could look on any more of these countless doors, +I heard a voice commanding me by my name to prepare. At +this word, I could feel myself beginning to melt, like a snow +ball in the heat of the sun; whereupon my master gave me some +soporific drink, so that I fell asleep, but by the time I awoke, +he had conveyed me to a considerable distance, on the other side +of the wall. I found myself in a valley of pitchy darkness, +and as it seemed to me, limitless. At the end of a little +time, I could see by a dim light, like that of a dying candle, +innumerable human shades—some on foot, and some on +horseback, running through one another like the wind, silently +and with wonderful solemnity.</p> +<p>It was a desert, bare, and blasted country, without grass, or +vegetation, or woods, and without animals, with the exception of +deadly monsters, and venomous reptiles of every kind; serpents, +snakes, lice, toads, maw-worms, locusts, ear-wigs, and the like, +which all exist on human corruption. Through myriads of +shades, and creeping things, graves, sepulchres, and cemeteries, +we proceeded, without interruption, to observe the country. +At last I perceived some of the shades turning and looking upon +me; and suddenly, notwithstanding the great silence that had +prevailed before, there was a whispering from one to the other +that there was a <i>living </i><!-- page 48--><a +name="page48"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 48</span><i>man</i> at +hand. “A living man,” said one; “a living +man,” said the other; and they came thronging about me like +caterpillars from every corner. “How did you come +hither, sirrah?” said a little morkin of a death who was +there. “Truly sir,” said I, “I know no +more than yourself.” “What do they call +you?” he demanded. “Call me what you please, +here in your own country,” I replied, “but at home I +am called <i>the Sleeping Bard</i>.”</p> +<p>At that word I beheld a crooked old man, with a double head +like to a rough-barked thorn tree, raising himself erect, and +looking upon me worse than the black devil himself; and lo! +without saying a word, he hurled a large human skull at my +head—many thanks to a tombstone which shielded me. +“Pray be quiet, sir,” said I. “I am but a +stranger, who was never here before, and you may be sure I will +never return, if I can once reach home again.” +“I will give you cause to remember having been here,” +said he; and attacked me with a thigh-bone, like a very devil, +whilst I avoided his blows as well as I could. “By +heavens,” said I, “this is a most inhospitable +country to strangers. Is there a justice of the peace +here?” “Peace!” said he, “what +peace do you deserve, who will not let people rest in their +graves?” “Pray, sir,” said I, “may +I be allowed to know your name, because I am not aware of ever +having disturbed any one in this country.” +“Sirrah,” said he, “know that not you are the +Sleeping Bard, but that I am that person; and I have been allowed +to rest here for nine hundred years, by every one but +yourself.” And he attacked me again.</p> +<p>“Forbear, my brother,” said Merddyn, who was near +at hand, “be not too hot; rather be thankful to him for +keeping an honorable remembrance of your name upon +earth.” “Great <!-- page 49--><a +name="page49"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 49</span>honor +forsooth,” said he, “I shall receive from such a +blockhead as this. Sirrah! can you sing in the +four-and-twenty measures? Can you carry the pedigree of Gog +and Magog, and the genealogy of Brutus ap Sylfius, up to a +millenium previous to the fall of Troy? Can you narrate +when, and what will be the end of the combats betwixt the lion +and the eagle, and betwixt the dragon and the red +deer?” “Hey, hey! let me ask him a +question,” said another, who was seated beside a large +cauldron which was boiling, and going, bubble, bubble, over a +fire. “Come nearer,” said he, “what is +the meaning of this?”</p> +<blockquote><p>“I till the judgment day<br /> +Upon the earth shall stray;<br /> +None knows for certainty<br /> +Whether fish or flesh I be.”</p> +</blockquote> +<p>“I will request the favor of your name, sir,” said +I, “that I may answer you in a suitable +manner.” “I,” said he, “am +Taliesin, <a name="citation49"></a><a href="#footnote49" +class="citation">[49]</a> the prince of the Bards of the West, +and that is a <!-- page 50--><a name="page50"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 50</span>piece of my composition.” +“I know not,” said I, “what could be your +meaning, unless it was, that the yellow plague <a +name="citation50"></a><a href="#footnote50" +class="citation">[50]</a> which destroyed Maelgwn of Gwynedd, put +an end to you on the sea-shore, and that your body was divided +amongst the crows and the fishes.” “Peace, +fool!” said he, “I was alluding to my two callings, +of man of the law and poet. Please to tell me, has a lawyer +more similitude to a raven, than a poet to a whale? How +many a one doth a single lawyer divest of his flesh, to swell out +his own craw; and with what indifference does he extract the +blood, and leave a man half alive! And as for the poet, +where is the fish which is able to swallow like him? he is +drinking oceans of liquor at all times, but the briny sea itself +would not slack his thirst. And provided a man be a poet +and a lawyer, how is it possible to know whether he be fish or +flesh, especially if he be a courtier to boot, as I was, and +obliged to vary his taste to every ones palate. But tell +me,” said he, “whether there are at present, any of +those fellows upon the earth?” “There’s +plenty of them,” said I; “if one can patch together +any nonsensical derry, he is styled a graduate bard. But as +for the others; there is such a plague of lawyers, petty +attornies, and scribes, that the locusts of Egypt bore light upon +the country, in comparison with them. In your time, sir, +there were but bargains of tofts and crofts, and a hand’s +breadth of writing for a farm of a hundred pounds, and a raising +of cairns and crosses, as memorials of the purchase and +boundaries. There is no longer any such security, but there +is far more craft and deceit, and a tombstone’s breadth of +written parchment to secure the bargain; <!-- page 51--><a +name="page51"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 51</span>and for all +that, it is a wonder if a flaw be not in it, or said to be at +least.” “Well then,” said Taliesin, +“I should not be worth a straw in the world at +present. I am better where I am. Truth will never be +had where there are many poets, nor fair dealing where there are +many lawyers; no, nor health where there are many +physicians.” At this moment, a little grey-headed +hobgoblin, who had heard that a living man was arrived, flung +himself at my feet, weeping abundantly. “Dear +me,” said I, “what are you?” “One +who is grievously wronged every day in the world,” said +he. “May God move your soul to procure justice for +me.” “What is your name?” said I. +“I am called <i>Somebody</i>,” he replied, “and +there is scarcely a piece of pimping, or a calumny, or a lie, or +tale, to set people at loggerheads, but must be laid upon +me. ‘Verily,’ says one, ‘she is a +prodigious fine girl, and she was praising you before somebody, +notwithstanding that some very great person is paying his suit to +her.’ ‘I heard somebody,’ says another, +‘reckoning that this estate was mortgaged nine hundred +pounds deep.’ ‘I saw some one yesterday,’ +says the beggar, ‘with a chequered slop, like a sailor, who +had come with a large ship load of corn, to the neighbouring +port.’ And thus every ragged dog mangles me for his +own wicked purposes. Some call me Friend—‘I was +informed by a friend,’ says one, ‘that so and so has +no intention of leaving a farthing to his wife, and that there is +no affection between them.’ Some others vilify me yet +more, and call me Bird—‘A bird whistled in my ear, +that there are bad practices going on there,’ say +they. It is true, some call me by the more respectable name +of Old Person; yet, not half the omens, prophecies, and counsels, +which are attributed to the Old Person, belong to me. I +have never bidden people to follow the old road, <!-- page +52--><a name="page52"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +52</span>provided the new one be better, nor a hundred similar +things. But Somebody is my common name,” he +continued, “him you will most frequently hear, to have been +concerned in every atrocious matter. Because, ask a person +wherever a vile, slanderous falsehood has been uttered, who it +was who said it, and he will reply, ‘Truly I don’t +know who, but somebody in the company said it;’ question +then every one in the company concerning the fable, and every one +will say he heard it from somebody, but no one knows from +whom. Is not this a shameful injury?” he +demanded. “Be so good as to inform every one whom you +may hear naming me, that I have never said any one of these +things, nor have ever invented nor uttered a lie to slander any +one, nor a story to set relations by the ears; that I do not go +near them; that I know nothing of their history, nor of their +affairs, nor of their accursed secrets; and that they ought not +to fling their wickedness upon me, but on their own corrupt +brains.”</p> +<p>At this moment there came a little death, one of the +secretaries of the king, desiring to know my name, and commanding +master Sleep, to carry me instantly before the king. I was +compelled to go, though utterly against my will, by the power, +which, like a whirlwind carried me away, betwixt high and low, +thousands of miles back to the left hand, until we came again in +sight of the boundary wall, and reached a narrow corner. +Here we perceived an immense, frowning, ruinous palace, open at +the top, reaching to the wall where were the innumerable doors, +all of which led to this huge, terrific court. The walls +were constructed with the sculls of men, which grinned horribly +with their teeth. The clay was black, and was prepared with +tears and sweat; and the mortar on the outside was variegated +with phlegm and pus, and on the inside <!-- page 53--><a +name="page53"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 53</span>with +black-red blood. On the top of each turret, you might see a +little death, with a smoking heart stuck on the point of his +dart.</p> +<p>Around the palace was a wood, consisting of a few poisonous +yews and deadly cypresses, and in these, owls, blood crows, +vultures and the like were nestling; and croaking continually for +flesh, though the whole place was nothing but a stinking +shamble. We entered the gate. All the pillars of the +hall were made of human thigh bones; the pillars of the parlour +were of shank bones; and the floors were one continued layer of +every species of offal. It was not long before I came in +sight of a vast and frightful altar, where I beheld the king of +Terrors swallowing human flesh and blood, and a thousand petty +deaths, from every hole, feeding him with fresh, warm +flesh. “Behold,” said the death who brought me +there, addressing himself to the king, “a spark, whom I +found in the midst of the land of Oblivion; he came so light +footed, that your majesty never tasted a morsel of +him.” “How can that be?” said the king, +and opened his jaws as wide as an earthquake to swallow me. +Whereupon I turned all trembling to Sleep. “It was +I,” said Sleep, “who brought him here.” +“Well,” said the meagre, grizly king, turning to me, +“for my brother Sleep’s sake, you shall be permitted +to return this time, but beware of me the next.” +After having employed himself for a considerable time in casting +carcasses into his insatiable paunch, he caused his subjects to +be called together, and moved from the altar to a terrific throne +of exceeding height, to pronounce judgment on the prisoners newly +arrived. In an instant came innumerable multitudes of the +dead, making their obeisance to their king, and taking their +stations in remarkable order. And lo! king Death was <!-- +page 54--><a name="page54"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +54</span>in his regal vest of flaming scarlet, covered all over +with figures of women and children weeping, and men uttering +groans; about his head was a black-red three-cornered cap (which +his friend Lucifer had sent as a present to him,) and upon its +corners were written <i>misery</i>, <i>wailing</i>, and +<i>woe</i>. Above his head were thousands of +representations of battles on sea and land, towns burning, the +earth opening, and the great water of the deluge; and beneath his +feet nothing was to be seen but the crowns and sceptres of the +kings whom he had overcome from the beginning. On his right +hand Fate was sitting, seemingly engaged in reading, with a murky +look, a huge volume which was before him; and on his left was an +old man called <i>Time</i>, licking innumerable threads of gold, +and silver, and copper, and very many of iron. Some few of +the threads were growing better towards their end, and thousands +growing worse. Along the threads were hours, days, and +years; and Fate, according as his volume directed him, was +continually breaking the threads of life, and opening the doors +of the boundary wall, betwixt the two worlds.</p> +<p>We had not looked around us long, before we heard four +fiddlers, newly dead, summoned to the bar. “How comes +it,” said the king of Terrors, “that loving merriment +as ye do, ye kept not on the other side of the gulf, for there +has never been any merriment on this side.” “We +have never done,” said one of the musicians, “harm to +any body, but have rendered people joyous, and have taken quietly +what they gave us for our pains.” Said Death, +“did you never keep any one from his work, and cause him to +lose his time; or did you never keep people from church? +ha!” “O no!” said another, “perhaps +now and then on a Sunday, after service, we may have kept some in +the public house till the next morning, or <!-- page 55--><a +name="page55"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 55</span>during summer +tide, may have kept them dancing in the ring on the green all +night; for sure enough, we were more liked, and more lucky in +obtaining a congregation than the parson.” +“Away, away with these fellows to the country of +Despair!” said the terrific king, “bind the four back +to back and cast them to their customers, to dance bare-footed on +floors of glowing heat, and to amble to all eternity without +either praise or music.”</p> +<p>The next that came to the bar was a certain king, who had +lived very near to Rome. “Hold up your hand, +prisoner,” said one of the officers. “I +hope,” said he, “that you have some better manners +and favour to show to a king.” “Sirrah,” +said Death, “why did you not keep on the other side of the +gulf where all are kings? On this side there is none but +myself, and another down below, and you will soon see, that +neither he nor I will rate you according to the degree of your +majesty, but according to the degree of your wickedness, in order +to adapt your punishment to your crimes, therefore answer to the +interrogation.” “Sir,” he replied, +“I would have you know, that you have no authority to +detain me, nor to interrogate me, as I have a pardon for all my +sins under the Pope’s own hand. On account of my +faithful services, he has given me a warrant to go straight to +Paradise, without tarrying one moment in Purgatory.” +At these words the king and all the haggard train gave a ghastly +grin, to escape from laughing outright; but the other full of +wrath at their ridicule, commanded them aloud to show him the +way. “Peace, thou lost fool!” cried Death, +“Purgatory lies behind you, on the other side of the wall, +for you ought to purify yourself during your life; and on the +right hand, on the other side of that gulf is Paradise. But +there is no road by which <!-- page 56--><a +name="page56"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 56</span>it is +possible for you to escape, either through the gulf to Paradise, +or through the boundary wall back to the world; and if you were +to give your kingdom, (supposing you could give it,) you would +not obtain permission from the keepers of those doors, to take +one peep through the key hole. It is called the +irrepassable wall, for when once you have come through you may +abandon all hope of returning. But since you stand so high +on the books of the Pope, you shall go and prepare his bed, +beside that of the Pope who was before him, and there you shall +kiss his toe for ever, and he the toe of Lucifer.”</p> +<p>Immediately thereupon, four little deaths raised the poor king +up, who was by this time shivering like the leaf of an aspen, and +snatched him out of sight like lightning. Next after him +came a young fellow and woman. He had been a jolly +companion and she a lady of pleasure, or one free of her person; +but they were called here by their naked names, drunkard and +harlot. “I hope,” said the drunkard, “I +shall find some favour with you; I have sent to you many a +bloated booty in a torrent of good ale; and when I failed to kill +others, I came myself, willingly, to feed you.” +“With the permission of the court,” said the harlot, +“you have not sent half as much as I, and my offerings were +burning sacrifices, rich roast meat ready for the +board.” “Hey, hey!” said Death, +“all this was done for your own accursed passions’ +sake and not to feed me. Bind the two face to face, as they +are old acquaintances, and cast them into the land of Darkness, +and let each be a torment to the other, until the day of +judgment.” They were then snatched away, with their +heads downwards.</p> +<p>Next to these there came seven recorders. Having been +commanded to raise their hands to the bar, they would by no <!-- +page 57--><a name="page57"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +57</span>means obey, as the rails were greasy. One began to +wrangle boisterously; “we ought to obtain a fair citation +to prepare our answer;” said he, “instead of being +rushed upon unawares.”</p> +<p>“But are we bound to give you that same specific +citation,” answered Death, “since you obtain in every +place, and at every period of your life, warning of my +coming. How many sermons have you not heard upon the +mortality of man? How many books have you not seen? +How many graves, how many sculls, how many diseases, how many +messages and signs have you not had? What is your Sleep, +but my own brother? What are sculls, but my visage? +What does your daily food consist of but dead creatures? +Seek not to cast your neglect upon me. Speak not of +summons, when you have obtained it a hundred times.” +“Pray,” said one red recorder, “what have you +to advance against us?” “What?” said +Death. “Drinking the sweat and blood of the poor, and +levying double your wages.” “Here is an honest +man,” replied the recorder, pointing to a pettifogger +behind him, “who knows that we have never done any thing +but what was fair; and it is not fair of you to detain us here, +without a specific crime to prove against us.” +“Hey, hey!” said Death, “you shall prove +against yourselves. Place these people,” said he, +“on the verge of the <i>precipice</i> before the tribunal +of <i>Justice</i>, they shall obtain equity there though they +never practiced it.”</p> +<p>There were still seven other prisoners remaining, and these +kept up a prodigious bustle and noise. Some were +flattering, others quarrelling, some blustering, some +counselling, &c. Scarcely had they been called to the +bar, when lo! the entire palace became seven times more horribly +dark than before, and there was a shivering and a great agitation +about <!-- page 58--><a name="page58"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 58</span>the throne, and Death became paler +than ever. Upon enquiring what was the matter, one of the +messengers of Lucifer stepped forward with a letter for Death, +concerning these seven prisoners, and Fate presently caused the +letter to be read publicly, and these were the words, as far as I +can remember.</p> +<blockquote><p>“<i>Lucifer</i>, <i>King of the kings of the +world</i>, <i>prince of Hell</i>, <i>and ruler of the Deep</i>, +<i>to our natural son</i>, <i>the most mighty and terrible king +Death</i>, <i>greeting</i>, <i>pre-eminence</i>, <i>and eternal +spoil</i>.</p> +<p>“For as much as we have been informed by some of our +nimble messengers, who are constantly abroad to obtain +information, that seven prisoners, of the seven most villainous +and dangerous species in the world, have arrived lately at your +royal palace, and that it is your intention to hurl them over the +cliff into my kingdom. I hereby counsel you to try every +possible means, to let them loose back again upon the world; they +will do you there more service in sending you food, and sending +me better company, for I would rather want than have them; we +have had but too much plague with their companions for a long +time, and my dominion is still disturbed by them. Therefore +turn them back, or keep them with you. For, by the infernal +crown, if you send them here, I will undermine the foundations of +your kingdom, until it falls down into my own immense +dominion.</p> +<p>“<i>From the burning hall of assembly</i>, <i>at our +royal palace in the pit of Hell</i>, <i>in the year of our +reign</i>, 5425.”</p> +</blockquote> +<p>King Death, hereupon, stood for some time with his visage +green and pale, in great perplexity of mind. But <!-- page +59--><a name="page59"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +59</span>whilst he was meditating, behold <i>Fate</i>, turned +upon him such an iron-black scowl, as made him tremble. +“Sirrah,” said he, “look to what you do. +It is not in my power to send any one back, through the boundary +of eternity, the irrepassable wall, nor in yours to harbour them +here; therefore forward them to their destruction, in spite of +the Arch Fiend. He has been able hitherto, in a minute to +allot his proper place to every individual, in a drove of a +thousand, nay, even of ten thousand captured souls; and what +difficulty can he have with seven, however dangerous they may +be. But though these seven should turn the infernal +government topsy-turvy, do you drive them thither instantly, for +fear I should receive commands to annihilate you before your +time. As for <i>his</i> threats, they are only lies; for +although thy end, and that of the old man yonder, (looking at +Time,) are nigh at hand, being written only a few pages further +on, in my unerring volume, yet you have no cause to be afraid of +sinking to Lucifer; though every one in the abyss would be glad +to obtain thee, yet they never, never shall. For the rocks +of steel and eternal adamant, which form the roof of Hell, are +too strong for anything to crumble them.” Whereupon, +Death, considerably startled, called to one of his train, to +write for him the following answer.</p> +<blockquote><p>“<i>Death</i>, <i>the king of Terror and +Conqueror of conquerors</i>, <i>to his revered friend and +neighbour Lucifer</i>, <i>king of Eternal Night</i>, <i>sovereign +of the Bottomless Pool</i>, <i>sends greeting</i>.</p> +<p>“After due reflection on your regal desire, it has +appeared to us more advantageous, not only to our own dominion, +but likewise to your own extensive kingdom, to send these <!-- +page 60--><a name="page60"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +60</span>prisoners, as far as possible from the doors of the +irrepassable wall, lest their putrid odour should terrify the +whole city of Destruction, so that no man should come to all +eternity, to my side of the gate; and neither I obtain any thing +to cool my sting, nor you a concourse of customers from earth to +hell. Therefore I will leave to you to judge them, and to +hurl them into such cells, as you may deem the most proper and +secure for them.</p> +<p>“<i>From my nether palace in the great gate of +Perdition</i>, <i>over Destruction</i>. <i>In the year</i>, +<i>from the renewal of my kingdom</i>, 1670.”</p> +</blockquote> +<p>At hearing all this, I felt a great curiosity to know who +these seven people could be, whom the devils themselves held in +so much dread. But ere a minute had elapsed, the clerk of +the crown called their names, as follows:—Master Meddler, +alias <i>Finger in Every Dish</i>; but he was so vehement and +busy in advising the others, that he could not get a +moment’s time to answer for himself, until Death threatened +to transfix him with his dart.</p> +<p>Then <i>master Slanderer</i> was called, alias <i>Enemy of +Fair Fame</i>; but there was no answer. “He is too +modest to hear his titles,” said the third, “and he +never can bear his nicknames.” “Do you +suppose,” said the <i>Slanderer</i>, “that you +yourself have no <i>titles</i>. Call for,” said he, +“<i>master Coxcomb</i>, alias <i>Smooth Gullet</i>, alias +<i>Poison Smile</i>.” “Ready,” said a +woman who was there, pointing to the Coxcomb. +“O,” said he, “<i>madam Bouncer</i>! Your +humble servant, I am overjoyed at seeing you well. I have +never seen a woman look handsomer in breeches. But, oh! to +think how miserable the country must be behind you, for want of +its admirable she-governor; <!-- page 61--><a +name="page61"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 61</span>yet your +delightful company will make hell itself something +better.” “O son of the arch fiend!” said +she. “With you there is no need of another hell, you +are yourself enough.” Then the cryer called +<i>Bouncer</i>, or <i>mistress Breeches</i>. +“Ready,” said another. But she said not a word, +for want of being called madam. Next was called +<i>Contriver of Contrivances</i>, alias <i>Jack of all +Trades</i>; but he returned no answer either, for he was busied +in devising a way to escape. “Ready, ready,” +said one behind, “here he is, looking out for an +opportunity to break through your palace, and unless you take +care, he will have some notable contrivance to baulk +you.” Said the Contriver, “call him, I beseech +you, <i>master Impeacher of his Brother</i>, alias <i>Searcher of +Faults</i>, alias <i>Framer of Complaints</i>.” +“Ready, ready, this is he,” said a litigious +pettifogger, for every one knew the name of the other, but would +not acknowledge his own. “You shall be called,” +said the Impeacher, “<i>master Litigious Pettifogger</i>, +alias <i>the Courts Comprised</i>.” “Bear +witness, I pray you all,” said the Pettifogger, “as +to what the knave called me.” “Ho, ho!” +said Death, “not by the baptismal font, but by his sins, is +every one called in this country; and, with your permission, +master Pettifogger, the names of your sins are those which shall +stick to you henceforth for ever.” “Hey,” +said the Pettifogger, “I swear by the Devil that I will +make you smart for this. Though you are empowered to kill +me, you have no authority to bestow nicknames upon me. I +will file a complaint against you for defamation, and another for +false imprisonment, against you and your friend Lucifer, in the +court of Justice.”</p> +<p>By this time, I beheld the legions of Death, formed in order +and armed, with their eyes fixed upon the king, awaiting <!-- +page 62--><a name="page62"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +62</span>the word. “There,” said the king, +standing erect upon his regal throne, “my terrible and +invincible hosts, spare neither care nor diligence in removing +these prisoners from out of my boundaries, lest they prove the +ruin of my country; cast them bound, over the precipice of +Despair, with their heads downward. But for the seventh, +this Courts Comprised, who threatens me, leave him free over the +chasm, beneath the court of <i>Justice</i>, and let him try +whether he can make his complaint good against me.” +Then Death reseated himself. And lo! all the deadly +legions, after surrounding the prisoners and binding them, led +them away to their couch. I also went out, and peeped after +them. “Come away,” said Sleep, and snatched me +up to the top of the highest turret of the palace. Thence I +could see the prisoners proceeding to their eternal +perdition. Presently a whirlwind arose, and dispersed the +pitch-black cloud, which was spread universally over the face of +the land of Oblivion, and by the light of a thousand candles, +which were burning with a blue flame, at a particular place, I +obtained a far distant view of the verge of the <i>Bottomless +Gulf</i>, a sight exceedingly horrible; and also of a spectacle +above, still more appalling, namely <i>Justice</i> upon his +<i>supreme seat</i>, holding the keys of Hell, at a separate and +distinct tribunal over the chasm, to pronounce judgment upon the +damned as they came. I could see the prisoners cast +headlong down the gulf, and Pettifogger rushing to fling himself +over the terrific brink, rather than look once on the court of +<i>Justice</i>. For oh! there was there a spectacle too +severe for a guilty countenance. I merely gazed from +<i>afar</i>, but I beheld more terrific horror, than I can at +present relate, or I could at that time support, for my spirit +struggled and fluttered at the awful sight, and wrestled so +strenuously, that <!-- page 63--><a name="page63"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 63</span>it burst all the bands of Sleep, and +my soul returned to its accustomed functions. And +exceedingly overjoyed I was to see myself still amongst the +living. I instantly determined upon reforming myself, as a +hundred years of affliction in the paths of righteousness, would +be less harrowing to me, than another glance on the horrors of +this night.</p> +<h3>Death the Great.</h3> +<p>Leave land and house we must some day,<br /> +For human sway not long doth bide;<br /> +Leave pleasures and festivities,<br /> +And pedigrees, our boast and pride.</p> +<p>Leave strength and loveliness of mien,<br /> +Wit sharp and keen, experience dear;<br /> +Leave learning deep, and much lov’d friends,<br /> +And all that tends our life to cheer.</p> +<p><!-- page 64--><a name="page64"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +64</span>From Death then is there no relief?<br /> +That ruthless thief and murderer fell,<br /> +Who to his shambles beareth down<br /> +All, all we own, and us as well.</p> +<p>Ye monied men, ye who would fain<br /> +Your wealth retain eternally,<br /> +How brave ’twould be a sum to raise,<br /> +And the good grace of Death to buy!</p> +<p>How brave! ye who with beauty beam,<br /> +On rank supreme who fix your mind,<br /> +Should ye your captivations muster,<br /> +And with their lustre king Death blind.</p> +<p>O ye who are at foot most light,<br /> +Who are in the height now of your spring,<br /> +Fly, fly, and ye will make us gape,<br /> +If ye can scape Death’s cruel fling.</p> +<p>The song and dance afford, I ween,<br /> +Relief from spleen, and sorrows grave;<br /> +How very strange there is no dance,<br /> +Nor tune of France, from Death can save!</p> +<p>Ye travellers of sea and land,<br /> +Who know each strand below the sky;<br /> +Declare if ye have seen a place,<br /> +Where Adam’s race can Death defy!</p> +<p><!-- page 65--><a name="page65"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +65</span>Ye scholars, and ye lawyer crowds,<br /> +Who are as gods reputed wise;<br /> +Can ye from all the lore ye know,<br /> +’Gainst Death bestow some good advice?</p> +<p>The world, the flesh, and Devil, compose<br /> +The direst foes of mortals poor;<br /> +But take good heed of Death the Great,<br /> +From the Lost Gate, Destruction o’er.</p> +<p>’Tis not worth while of Death to prate,<br /> +Of his Lost Gate and courts so wide;<br /> +But O reflect! it much imports,<br /> +Of the two courts in which ye’re tried.</p> +<p>It here can little signify<br /> +If the street high we cross, or low;<br /> +Each lofty thought doth rise, be sure,<br /> +The soul to lure to deepest woe.</p> +<p>But by the wall that’s ne’er re-pass’d,<br +/> +To gripe thee fast when Death prepares,<br /> +Heed, heed thy steps, for thou mayst mourn<br /> +The slightest turn for endless years.</p> +<p>When opes the door, and swiftly hence<br /> +To its residence eternal flies<br /> +The soul, it matters much, which side<br /> +Of the gulf wide its journey lies.</p> +<p><!-- page 66--><a name="page66"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +66</span>Deep penitence, amended life,<br /> +A bosom rife of zeal and faith,<br /> +Can help to man alone impart,<br /> +Against the smart and sting of Death.</p> +<p>These things to thee seem worthless now,<br /> +But not so low will they appear<br /> +When thou art come, O thoughtless friend!<br /> +Just to the end of thy career.</p> +<p>Thou’lt deem, when thou hast done with earth,<br /> +These things of worth unspeakable,<br /> +Beside the gulf so black and drear,<br /> +The gulf of Fear, ’twixt Heaven and Hell.</p> +<h2><!-- page 69--><a name="page69"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +69</span>A Vision of Hell.</h2> +<p>One fair morning of genial April, when the earth was green and +pregnant, and Britain, like a paradise, was wearing splendid +liveries, tokens of the smile of the summer sun, I was walking +upon the bank of the Severn, in the midst of the sweet notes of +the little songsters of the wood, who appeared to be striving to +break through all the measures of music, whilst pouring forth +praise to the Creator. I too occasionally raised my voice, +and warbled with the feathered choir, though in a manner somewhat +more restrained than that in which they sang; and occasionally +read a portion of the book of the Practice of Godliness. +Nevertheless, my former visions would not depart from my +remembrance, but continually troubled me by coming across all +other thoughts. And they persisted in doing so, until, by +arguing the matter minutely with myself, I reflected that there +is no vision but what comes from above, to warn one to be upon +one’s guard, and that consequently it was my duty to write +mine <!-- page 70--><a name="page70"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +70</span>down, that they might serve as a warning to others +also. I therefore returned to my home, and whilst +overwhelmed with melancholy, I was endeavouring to collect some +of my frightful reminiscences, I happened to give a yawn over my +paper, and this gave master Sleep an opportunity to glide upon +the top of me. Scarcely had Sleep closed my senses, when, +behold! a glorious apparition came towards me, in the shape of a +young man, tall and exceedingly beautiful; his garments were +seven times more white than snow, his countenance was so lustrous +that it rendered the very sun obscure, and his curling locks of +gold parted in two lovely wreaths upon his head, in the form of a +crown. “Come with me, mortal man,” said he on +coming up. “Who art thou, my lord?” said +I. “I am,” he replied, “the angel of the +countries of the North, the guardian of Britain and its +queen. I am one of the princes who are stationed beneath +the throne of the Lamb, who receive commands for the protection +of the gospel, against all its enemies in Hell and in Rome, in +France and Constantinople, in Africa and in India, and +wheresoever else they are devising artifices for its +destruction. I am the angel who conducted thee below to +castle Belial, and who showed thee the vanity and madness of the +whole world, the city of Destruction, and the excellence of the +city of Emmanuel, and I am come once more by his command, to show +thee other things, because thou art seeking to turn to account +what thou hast seen already.” “How, my +lord,” said I, “will your illustrious majesty, which +superintends kings and kingdoms, condescend to associate with +such a poor worm as myself?” “O,” said +he, “we respect more the virtue of a beggar than the +grandeur of a sovereign. What if I be greater than the +kings of the earth, and higher than many of the countless <!-- +page 71--><a name="page71"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +71</span>potentates of heaven? As my wonderful master +deigned to humble himself so inexpressibly as to wear one of your +bodies, and to live among you, and to die for your salvation, how +should I presume to be dissatisfied with my duty in serving you, +and the vilest of the human race, since ye are so high in favour +with my master? Come out, spirit, and free thyself from thy +clay,” said he, with his eyes directed upwards. And +with that word, I could feel myself becoming extricated from +every part of my body. No sooner was I free, than he +snatched me up to the firmament of heaven, through the region of +lightning and thunder, and all the glowing armories of the sky, +innumerable degrees higher than I had been with him before, +whence I could scarcely descry the earth, which looked no wider +than a croft. After permitting me to rest a short space, he +again lifted me up a million of miles, until I could see the sun +far below us; we rushed through the milky way and past the +Pleiades, and many other exceedingly large stars, till we caught +a distant view of other worlds. At length, by dint of +journeying, we reached the confines of the awful eternity, and +were in sight of the two palaces of the mighty king Death, which +stand one on the right hand and the other on the left, and are at +a great distance from each other, as there is an immense void +between them. I enquired whether we should go to see the +right hand palace, because it did not appear to me to resemble +the other which I had seen before. “You will probably +see,” he replied, “sometime, still more of the +difference which is between the one palace and the other; but at +present it is necessary for us to sail another +course.” Whereupon we turned away from the little +world, and having arrived over the intervening gap, we let +ourselves down to the country of Eternity, between the two <!-- +page 72--><a name="page72"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +72</span>palaces, into the horrible void; an enormous country it +was, exceedingly deep and dark—without order and without +inhabitants—now hot, now cold—sometimes silent, +sometimes noisy, with the sound caused by cataracts of water +tumbling upon the flames and extinguishing them; which cataracts, +however, did not long continue, for presently might be seen a +puff of fire bursting out and consuming the water. There +was here no course, nor whole, nothing living, nothing shapely; +but a giddy discord and an amazing darkness which would have +blinded me for ever, if my companion had not again displayed his +heavenly garment of splendour. By the light which it cast I +could see the country of Oblivion, and the edges of the wilds of +Destruction in front, on the left hand; and on the right the +lowest skirts apparently of the walls of Glory. +“Behold the great gulf between Abraham and Dives,” +said my guide, “which is termed the place of Chaos. +It is the region of the elements which God created first; it is +the place wherein are the seeds of every living thing, from which +the Almighty word made your world and all that therein +is—water, fire, air, earth, animals, fishes and creeping +things, winged birds, and human bodies, but not your souls, for +they are of an origin and generation higher and more +exalted.” Through the vast, frightful place of Chaos +we at length broke out to the left hand, and before travelling +any distance there, where every thing was ever becoming more +frightful, I could feel my heart at the top of my throat, and my +hair standing like the prickles of the hedge-hog, even before +seeing any thing; but when I <i>did</i> see—oh! spectacle +too much for tongue to relate, or for the spirit of man to +behold. I fainted. Oh, the amazing and monstrous +abyss, opening in a horrible manner into the other world! +Oh, the <!-- page 73--><a name="page73"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 73</span>continual crackling of the terrible +flames, darting over the sides of the accursed precipice, and the +flashes of linked lightning rending the black, thick smoke, which +the unsightly orifice was casting up! My dear companion, +having brought me to myself again, gave me some spiritual water +to drink; O how excellent it was in its taste and color! +After drinking of the heavenly water, I could feel a wonderful +strength diffusing itself through me, bringing with it sense, +heart, faith, and various other heavenly virtues. By this +time I had approached with him unterrified to the edge of the +steep, enveloped in the veil, the flames parting on both sides +and avoiding us, not daring to come in contact with the +inhabitants of the supreme abodes. Then from the summit of +the terrific precipice we darted down, like two stars falling +from the firmament of heaven, a thousand million of miles, over +many a brimstone crag, and many a furious, ugly cataract and +glowing precipice, every thing that we passed looking always +frowningly downward; yet every thing noxious avoided us, except +once, when having thrust my nose out of the veil, I was struck by +such a suffocating, strangling exhalation as would have put an +end to me, if my guide had not instantly assisted me with the +water of life. By the time that I had recovered, I +perceived that we had arrived at a kind of standing place; for in +all this loathsome chasm it was impossible to obtain any rest +before, owing to the steepness and slipperiness of its +sides. There my guide permitted me to take some further +rest; and during this respite, it happened that the thunders and +the hoarse whirlwinds became silent for a little while, and in +spite of the din of the raging cataracts, I heard from afar a +sound louder than the whole—a sound of horrible harsh +voices, of shouting, bellowing, and strong groans, <!-- page +74--><a name="page74"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +74</span>swearing, cursing, and blaspheming, till I would have +consented to part with mine ears, that I might not hear. +Ere we moved a foot farther, we could hear a terrible tumbling +sound, and if we had not suddenly slipped aside, hundreds of +unfortunate men would have fallen upon us, who were coming +headlong, in excessive hurry, to take possession of their bad +purchase, with a host of devils driving them. “O, +sir,” said one devil, “take it easy, lest you should +ruffle your curling locks. Madam, do you wish for an easy +cushion? I am afraid that you will be out of all order by +the time you come to your couch,” said he to another.</p> +<p>The strangers were exceedingly averse to going forward, +insisting that they were out of their road; but notwithstanding +all they could say, go they did, and we behind them, to a black +flood of great magnitude, and through it they went, and we across +it, my companion holding the celestial water continually to my +nostrils, to strengthen me against the stench of the river, and +against the time when I should see some of the inhabitants of the +place, for hitherto I had not beheld so much as one devil, though +I had heard the voices of many. “Pray, my +lord,” said I, “what is the name of this putrid +river?” “The river of the Fiend,” said +he, “in which all his subjects are bathed, in order that +they may be rendered fit for the country. For this accursed +water changes their countenance, and washes away from them every +relic of goodness, every semblance of hope and of +comfort.” And, indeed, on gazing upon the host after +it had come through, I could distinguish no difference in +deformity between the devils and the damned. Some of the +latter would fain have sculked at the bottom of the river, and +have lain there to all eternity, in a state of strangulation, +lest they should get a worse bed father <!-- page 75--><a +name="page75"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 75</span>on; but here +the proverb was verified, that “he must needs run whom the +Devil drives,” for with the devils behind, the damned were +compelled to go forward unto the beach, to their eternal +damnation; where I at the first glance saw more pains and +torments than the heart of man can imagine or the tongue relate; +a single one of which was sufficient to make the hair stand +erect, the blood to freeze, the flesh to melt, the bones to drop +from their places—yea, the spirit to faint. What is +empaling or sawing men alive, tearing off the flesh piecemeal +with iron pincers, or broiling the flesh with candles, collop +fashion, or squeezing heads flat in a vice, and all the most +shocking devices which ever were upon earth, compared with one of +these? Mere pastime! Here were a hundred thousand +shoutings, hoarse sighs, and strong groans; yonder a boisterous +wailing and horrible outcry answering them, and the howling of a +dog is sweet, delicious music, when compared with these +sounds. When we had proceeded a little way onward from the +accursed beach, towards the wild place of Damnation, I perceived, +by their own light, innumerable men and women here and there; and +devils without number and without rest, incessantly employing +their strength in tormenting. Yes, there they were, devils +and damned, the devils roaring with their own torments, and +making the damned roar, by means of the torments which they +inflicted upon them. I paid particular observation to the +corner which was nearest me. There I beheld the devils with +pitch-forks, tossing the damned up into the air, that they might +fall headlong on poisoned hatchels or barbed pikes, there to +wriggle their bowels out. After a time the wretches would +crawl in multitudes, one upon another, to the top of one of the +burning crags, there to be broiled like mutton; from there <!-- +page 76--><a name="page76"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +76</span>they would be snatched afar, to the top of one of the +mountains of eternal frost and snow, where they would be allowed +to shiver for a time; thence they would be precipitated into a +loathsome pool of boiling brimstone, to wallow there in +conflagration, smoke, and the suffocation of horrible stench; +from the pool they would be driven to the marsh of Hell that they +might embrace and be embraced by its reptiles many times worse +than serpents and vipers; after allowing them half an +hour’s dalliance with these creatures, the devils would +seize a bundle of rods of steel, fiery hot from the furnace, and +would scourge them till their howlings, caused by the horrible +inexpressible pain which they endured, would fill the vast abode +of darkness, and when the fiends deemed that they had scourged +them enough, they would take hot irons and sear their bloody +wounds.</p> +<p>There was here no fainting, nor swooning to evade a moment of +suffering, but a continual strength to suffer and to feel, though +you would have imagined after one horrible cry, that it would be +utterly impossible there should be strength remaining to give +another cry so frightfully loud; the damned never lowered their +key, and the devils kept replying, “behold your welcome for +ever and ever.” And it almost seemed that the +sauciness and bitterness of the devils, in jeering and mocking +their victims, were worse to bear than the pain itself. +What was worst of all, their conscience was at present utterly +aroused, and was tearing them worse than a thousand of the +infernal lions. We proceeded farther and farther downward, +and the farther we proceeded, the more horrible was the work +which was going on; the first place we came to in our progress +was a frightful prison, in which were many human beings under the +scourge of the devils, shrieking most <!-- page 77--><a +name="page77"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +77</span>shockingly. “What place is this?” said +I. “That,” said the angel, “is the couch +of those who cry ‘woe is me that I did +not—!’ Hark to them for a moment!” +“Woe is me that I did not purify myself in time from every +kind of sin!” says one. “Woe is me that I did +not believe and repent before coming here!” says the +other.</p> +<p>Next to the cell of too late repentance, and of debate after +judgment had been passed, was the prison of the procrastinators, +who would be every time promising amendment, without ever +fulfilling their promise. “When this business is +over,” says one, “I will turn over another +leaf.” “When this obstacle is removed, I will +become a new man yet,” says the other. But when the +obstacle is removed, they are not a bit the nearer to +reformation, for some other obstacle is always found to prevent +them from moving towards the gate of Righteousness, and if they +do sometimes move a little, they are sure to turn back. +Next to this was the prison of vain confidence, full of those +who, on being commanded to abstain from their luxuriousness, +drunkenness, or avarice, would say, “God is merciful, and +better than his word, and will not damn his creature for ever for +so small a matter.” But here they were yelping forth +blasphemy, and asking where is that mercy, which was boasted to +be immeasurable. “Peace, hell-dogs,” at length +said a great lobster of a devil who was hearing them, +“peace! would you have mercy without doing any thing to +obtain it? Would you have the Truth render his word false, +for the sake of obtaining the company of such filthy dross as +you? Too much mercy has been shown to you already. +You were given a Saviour, a comforter, and the apostles, with +books, sermons, and good examples, and will you never cease to +deafen us with bawling about mercy, where <!-- page 78--><a +name="page78"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 78</span>mercy has +never been?” On going out from this fiery gulf, I +could hear one puffing and shouting terribly, “I knew no +better, nothing was ever expended in teaching me my duty, and I +could never find time to read or pray, because I was obliged to +earn bread for myself and my poor family.” +“Aye,” said a little crooked devil who stood by, +“and did you never find time to tell pleasant +stories?—no leisure for self vaunting during long winter +evenings when I was in the chimney corner? Now, why did you +not devote some of that time to learning to read and pray? +Who on Sundays used to come with me to the tavern, instead of +going with the parson to church? Who devoted many a Sunday +afternoon to vain prating about worldly things, or to sleep, +instead of meditation and prayer? And have ye merely acted +according to your knowledge and your opportunities? Peace, +sirrah, with your lying nonsense!” “O thou +blood of a mad dog!” said the lost man, “it is not +long since you were whispering something very different into my +ear, if you had said that the other day, I should scarcely have +come here.” “O,” said the devil, +“we do not mind telling you the bitter truth here, since we +need not fear that you will go back to tell tales.”</p> +<p>Below this cell I saw a kind of vast pit, and in it what +looked like an infinite quantity of loathsome ordure, burning +with a green flame, and on drawing near, I was aware, from the +horrid howling that proceeded from it, that it was composed of +men piled one upon another, the horrible flames crackling +meanwhile through them. “This hollow,” said the +angel, “is the couch of those who say after committing some +great sin, ‘pooh! I am not the first, I have plenty +of companions;’ and thus you see, they <i>do</i> get plenty +of companions, to verify their words and to increase their +agony.” Opposite <!-- page 79--><a +name="page79"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 79</span>to this +horrible place was a large cellar, where I could see men twisted, +as tow is twisted, or hemp is spun. “Pray,” +said I “who are these?” +“Panegyrists,” said he, “and out of sheer +mockery to them, the devils are trying whether it is possible to +twist them as flexibly as they twisted their own +discourse.” A little way below that cell, I could but +just descry a sort of prison-pool, very dark, and in it things +which had been men, having faces like the heads of wolf-dogs, and +up to their jaws in bog, barking blasphemy and lies most +furiously, as long as they could get their sting above the +mud. At this moment a troop of devils happening to pass by, +some of these creatures contrived to bite in the heels, ten or +twelve of the devils who had brought them thither. +“Woe and destruction to you hell-dogs!” said one of +the devils who had been bit, “you shall pay for +this;” and forthwith commenced beating the bog, till the +wretches were drowned in the stinking abysses. +“Who,” he then added, “have deserved hell +better than you, who have been hunting up and devising gossip, +and buzzing lies about from house to house, in order that you +might laugh, after having set a whole country at +loggerheads. What more could one of ourselves have +done?” “That,” said the angel, “is +the bed of the tale-bearers, the slanderers, and the whisperers, +and of all other envious curs, who are continually wounding +people behind their backs with their hands or their +tongues.”</p> +<p>From here we passed to a vast dungeon, by far the filthiest +that I had seen yet, and the most replete with toads, adders, and +stench. “This,” said my guide, “is the +place of the men who expect to get to heaven because they have no +ill intentions, that is, for being neither good nor +bad.” Next to this pool of ill savour, I beheld a +place where a vast crowd <!-- page 80--><a +name="page80"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 80</span>were sitting, +and without any thing visible to torment them, groaning more +piteously than any that I had hitherto heard in Hell. +“Mercy upon us,” said I, “what causes these +people to complain more than the rest, when they have neither +torture nor devil near them?” “O,” said +the angel, “the less torment they have without, the more +they have within. These are refractory heretics, atheists, +antichristians, worldly-wise ones, abjurers of the faith, +persecutors of the church, and an infinity of such like wretches, +who are abandoned entirely to the punishment of conscience, more +tormenting than flame or devil, which domineers over them +ceaselessly and without restraint. ‘I will never +permit myself any more,’ says she, ‘to be drowned in +ale, nor to be blinded by bribes, nor deafened by music and +company, nor lulled nor confounded by careless listlessness; for +now I <i>will</i> be listened to, and never shall the clack of +the hated truth cease in your ears.’ Longing is ever +raging within the wretch for the happiness which he has lost; +memory is ever reproaching him by saying how easy it was to be +obtained, and the understanding showing him the magnitude of his +loss, and the certainty that nothing is now to be obtained, but +indescribable gnawing for ever and ever. So with these +three instruments—namely longing, memory, and +understanding—conscience is tearing the lost one, in a +manner far worse than all the devils in Hell could tear him with +their claws.”</p> +<p>On coming out of this wonderful nook I heard a confused +talking, and after every word such a ghastly laughter, as if five +hundred devils were casting their horns with laughing. On +approaching to see the cause of such a rarity as laughter in +Hell, I discovered that it was only got up to incense two +honorable gentlemen, newly arrived, who were insisting on <!-- +page 81--><a name="page81"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +81</span>being shown respect suitable to their gentility. +One of them was a round bodied squire, having with him a big roll +of parchment—namely his map of pedigree—out of which +he recited from which of the fifty tribes of North Wales he was +sprung, and how many justices of the peace, and how many sheriffs +his house had produced. “Come, come,” said one +of the devils, “we know the merits of the greater part of +your ancestry. If you had been like your father or your +great grandfather, we should not have ventured to come in contact +with you; but you are only the heir of the pit of darkness, you +dirty hell-dog! You are scarcely worthy of a night’s +lodging,” added he, “and yet we’ll grant you +some nook, wherein to await the dawn;” and with that word +the goblin with his pitchfork, gave him more than thirty tosses +in the fiery air, until he at length cast him into an abyss out +of sight. “That may do,” said the other, +“for a squire of half blood, but I hope you will behave +better to a knight, who has had the honor of serving the king in +person, and can name twelve earls and fifty baronets belonging to +his ancient house.” “If your ancestors and your +ancient house be all that you can bring in your defence, you may +go the same road as he,” said one of the devils, +“because we can scarcely remember one ancient house, of +which some oppressor, murderer, or strong thief did not lay the +foundation, and which he did not transmit to people as froward as +himself, or to lazy drones, or drunken swine, to maintain whose +extravagant magnificence, the vassals and the tenantry must be +squeezed to death, whilst every handsome colt or pretty cow in +the neighbourhood must be parted with for the pleasure of the +mistress, and every lass or married woman, may consider herself +fortunate, if she escape the pleasure of the master; the +freeholders, meanwhile, being <!-- page 82--><a +name="page82"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 82</span>either +obliged to follow him like fawning hounds, rob themselves for his +benefit, and sell their patrimonies at his pleasure, or be +subject to frowns and hatred, and be dragged into every +disagreeable and vexatious employment during their lives.</p> +<p>“O these little great country folks,” continued +the devil, “how genteely they swear in order to obtain +credit with their mistresses, or with the shop-keepers; and when +they have decked themselves out, O how insolently they look upon +many of the middling officers of the church and state, and how +much worse on the common people! as if they were a species of +reptiles in comparison with themselves. Woe is me! is not +all blood of the same color? Did you not come all into the +world by the same way?” “But, nevertheless, +with your permission,” said the knight, “there are +some who are of much purer birth than others.” +“Destruction take you!” said the goblin, “there +is not one carcass of you all better than the rest; you are all +polluted with radical sin from Adam. But, sir,” said +he, “if your blood be better than other blood, less scum +will exude from you when boiling; however, in order to be sure of +its quality, it will be as well to search you with fire as well +as water.” Thereupon a devil in the shape of a +chariot of fire received him, and the other in mockery lifted him +into it, and away he was hurried like lightning. After a +short time the angel caused me to look, and I could see the +wretched knight suffering a terrible steeping in a frightful +boiling furnace, in company with Cain, Nimrod, Esau, Tarquin, +Nero, Caligula, and the others who were the founders of +genealogies, and were the first to set up arms of nobility.</p> +<p>A little farther on, my guide caused me to look through the +hollow of a rock, and there I beheld a number of coquettes <!-- +page 83--><a name="page83"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +83</span>briskly at work, doing and repeating all their former +follies upon earth. Some were twisting their mouths, some +were pulling their front locks with irons, some were painting +themselves, some patching their faces with sooty ointments, to +make the yellow look more fair; some quite mad at seeing their +visages, after all their pains in coloring and variegating, more +hideous than those of the very devils, were endeavouring to break +the mirrors, or were tearing off with their nails and their teeth +the whole artificial blush—the ointments, skin, and flesh +coming off all together. The cries which they uttered +occasionally were most dismal. “The curse of +curses,” would one say, “on my father, for making me +marry when a girl, an old sapless stump, whose work in raising +desires which he could not gratify has driven me +hither.” “A thousand curses on my +parents,” would another say, “for sending me to a +cloister to learn chastity; they would not have done worse in +sending me to a roundhead to learn generosity, or to a quaker to +learn manners, than to a papist to learn honor.” +“Destruction,” said another, “seize my mother +for her avaricious pride in preventing my obtaining a husband +when I wanted one, and thus obliging me to purloin the thing I +might have honorably come by.” “Hell, and +double Hell to the lustful wretch of a gentleman, who first began +tempting me,” would the third say; “if he had not, +betwixt fair and foul, broken the hedge, I had not become a cell +open to every body, nor had I come to this cell of +devils!” And then they fell to tearing themselves +again.</p> +<p>I was glad to quit such a pack of female dogs. But +before I had passed on many steps, I was surprised to see another +shoal of imprisoned wenches, twice more detestable than +they. Some had been changed into toads, some into <!-- page +84--><a name="page84"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +84</span>dragons, some into serpents who were swimming and +hissing, glavering and butting in a fetid, stagnant pool, much +larger than Llyn Tegid. <a name="citation84"></a><a +href="#footnote84" class="citation">[84]</a> “In the +name of wonder,” said I, “what sort of creatures may +these be?” “There are here,” said he, +“four sorts of wenches, all notoriously bad. First, +there are procuresses, with some of the principal lasses of their +respective bevies about them. Second, gossiping ladies with +a swarm of their news-bearing hags. Third, bouncing madams, +and a pack of sneaking curs on both sides of them, for no man, +but for downright fear of them, would ever go nigh them. +Fourth, scolds, become a hundred times more horrible than vipers, +with their poisonous stings going creak, creak to all +eternity.”</p> +<p>“I had imagined that Lucifer had been a king of too much +courtesy, to put a gentlewoman of my rank with such little petty +she-devils as these,” said one, something like a winged +serpent, only that she was much more fierce. “O that +he would send here, seven hundred of the worst devils in Hell in +exchange for thee, thou poisonous hell-spawn!” said another +ugly viper. “O! many thanks to you,” said a +gigantic devil who overheard them, “we set too much value +on our place and merits, to condescend to become mates of yours; +and though we are willing to admit that you are fully as +competent to torment people as the best of us, we would, +nevertheless, not yield up our duties to you.” +“And yet,” said the angel softly, “Lucifer has +another reason for keeping such a particular watch over these; he +knows well, that if they should break out, they would turn all +Hell topsy-turvy.” From here we went, still going +downward, to a place where I beheld a frightful den, in which was +a horrible clamour, the like of <!-- page 85--><a +name="page85"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 85</span>which I had +never heard, for swearing, cursing, blaspheming, snarling, +groaning, and crying. “Who is here?” said +I. “This,” said he, “is the den of the +thieves. Here is a swarm of game-keepers, lawyers, +stewards, and the old Judas in the midst of them; they have been +excessively annoyed at seeing the tailors and weavers above them, +in a more comfortable chamber.” Almost before I could +turn myself, there came a horse of a devil, bearing a physician +and an apothecary, whom he cast down amongst the pedlars and the +duffers, for selling bad, rotten ware; but they beginning to fume +at being placed in such low company, one of the devils said, +“stay, stay! you <i>do</i> deserve a different +place,” and cast them down amongst the conquerors and the +murderers. There was a multitude shut up here, for playing +with false dice and concealing cards; but before I could observe +much, I heard, close by the door, a terrible rush and rustle, +with a hie! hie! get on! ho! yo! hip! I turned to see what +it was; but perceiving nothing but horned goblins, I enquired of +my guide whether there were cuckolds amongst the devils? +“No,” said he, “they are in a particular +cell. These are drovers who would fain escape to the place +of the Sabbath-breakers, and are driven hither against their +will.” At that word, I looked, and perceived their +polls full of the horns of sheep and cattle, and those who drove +them, casting them down beneath the feet of the bloodiest +robbers. “Crouch there,” said one; +“though you feared so much of old the thieves on London +road, you were yourselves the very worst species of highwaymen, +living upon the road and plundering, yes, and murdering poor +families. O how many poor creatures did you not keep, with +their hungry mouths open, in vain expectation of the money for +the sale of the beasts, which they had intrusted to you; and you +in the <!-- page 86--><a name="page86"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 86</span>mean time in Ireland, or in the +King’s Bench laughing at them, or upon the road in the +midst of your wine and harlots.”</p> +<p>On quitting this den of furious heat, I got a sight of a lair, +exceeding all the rest I had seen in Hell, but one, in frightful +stinking filthiness, where was a herd of accursed drunken swine, +disgorging and swallowing, swallowing and disgorging, continually +and without rest, the most loathsome snivel. The next pit +was the couch of gluttony, where Dives and his companions were +upon their bellies, eating dirt and fire alternately, without any +liquid ever. A cave or two lower there was an exceedingly +spacious kitchen, in which some were in a state of roasting and +boiling, others frying and burning in an oven half heated. +“Behold the place of the merciless and the +unfeeling,” said the angel. I then turned a little to +the left hand, where there was a cell more light than any one +which I had yet seen in Hell, and enquired what place it +was? “The abode of the infernal dragons,” +replied the angel, “who are hissing and snarling, rushing +and preying upon one another every minute.” I +approached; and oh! the look which cannot be described was upon +them, the whole light was but the living fire in their +eyes. “These are the seed of Adam,” said my +guide, “morose wretches, and furious savage men; but, +yonder,” said he, “are some of the old seed of the +great dragon Lucifer;” and verily, I could perceive not a +whit more amiability in the one sort than in the other. In +the next cellar were the misers, in a state of horrible agony +with their hearts cleaving to coffers of burning treasure, the +rust whereof was ceaselessly cankering them, because those hearts +had been ceaselessly bent upon getting money—O the +consuming torment, worse than frenzy, that was now going on +within them, with care and repentance. Below this there +<!-- page 87--><a name="page87"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +87</span>was a hanging ledge, where there were some apothecaries +ground to dust, and stuffed into earthen pots amongst album +grecum, dung of geese and swine, and many an old stinking +ointment.</p> +<p>We were now journeying forward, continually descending, along +the wilderness of Destruction, through innumerable torments, +eternal and not to be described—from cell to cell, from +cellar to cellar, and the last always surpassing the others in +horror and ghastliness; at last we arrived at a vast porch, more +cheerless than any thing we had seen before. It was a very +spacious porch, and the pathway through it, which was frightfully +steep, led to a kind of dusky nook of incredible ugliness and +horror, and there the palace was. At the upper end of the +accursed court, among thousands of horrible objects, I could, by +means of the radiance of my heavenly companion, perceive amidst +the dreary darkness two feet of enormous magnitude, reaching to +the roof of the whole infernal firmament. I enquired of my +conductor what this horrible thing might be? +“Patience,” said he, “you shall obtain a more +ample view of this monster as you return; but move forward now to +see the royal palace.”</p> +<p>Whilst we were proceeding down the porch of Horror, we heard a +noise behind us, as of an immense number of people. Having +turned aside to let them pass forward, we beheld four distinct +bands, and soon discovered that the four princesses of the city +of Destruction, were bringing their subjects as presents to their +father. I recognised the princess Pride, not only by her +being before the others, but also by her habit of stumbling every +moment, for want of looking beneath her feet. She had with +her a vast many kings, potentates, <!-- page 88--><a +name="page88"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 88</span>courtiers, +gentlemen, and pompous people, many quakers, innumerable females +of every rank and degree.</p> +<p>The princess Lucre was next, with her silly, mean figure, +bringing along with her very many of the money loving +race—such as usurers, lawyers, extortioners, overseers, +game-keepers, harlots, and some ecclesiastics also. Next to +these was the amiable princess Pleasure and her daughter Folly, +conducting their subjects—consisting of players at dice, +cards, draughts, games of legerdemain, and of poets, musicians, +tellers of old stories, drunkards, ladies of pleasure, debauches, +pretty fellows, with a thousand million of all kinds of baubles, +to serve now as instruments of punishment for the lost +fools. After these three had gone with their prisoners to +the palace, to receive their judgment—behold Hypocrisy, the +last of all, conducting a more numerous rout than any of the +others, of all nations and ages, of town and country, gentle and +simple, males and females. At the tail of the two-faced +multitudes we advanced till we came in sight of the palace, +through many dragons and horned sprites, and warriors of Hell, +the black wardens of the gloomy pandemonium, I all the time +crouching very carefully within my veil. We entered the +frightful and awful edifice, every corner of which abounded with +horror. The walls were immense rocks of glowing adamant, +the pavement of an insufferably sharp flint, the roof of burning +steel, meeting like an arch of greenish-blue and dusky-red +flames, and in its size and its heat, resembling an immense +vaulted baking oven.</p> +<p>Opposite to the door, on a flaming throne, the Arch-Fiend was +seated, his principal lost angels on both sides of him, on +thrones of fire terrible to behold—sitting according to +their former rank in the regions of light, when they were <!-- +page 89--><a name="page89"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +89</span>amiable messengers. It would only be in vain to +endeavour to relate how obscene and horrible they were; and the +longer I looked at any one of them, seven times more hideous he +appeared. In the midst, above the head of Lucifer, was a +vast fist, holding a very frightful bolt. The princesses, +after making their obeisance, returned to the world to their +charges, without making any stay. As soon as they had +departed, a gigantic, wide-mouthed devil, by command of the king, +uttered a shout louder than a hundred discharges of artillery, as +loud if possible as the last trumpet, for the purpose of +summoning the infernal parliament. And lo! the rabble of +Hell instantly filled the palace and the porch in every shape, +after the image and similitude of the principal sin, which each +delighted to thrust upon mankind. After commanding silence, +Lucifer, with his look directed to the potentates nearest to him, +began to speak, very graciously, in the following +manner:—</p> +<p>“Ye potentates of Hell! princes of the black abodes of +Despair! Though by our confederacy we have lost possession +of those thrones, from which we once shone resplendent through +the higher regions; our confederacy was, nevertheless, a glorious +one, as we aimed at nothing less than the whole. And we +have not lost the whole either; for lo! the extensive and +profound regions, to the extremest wilds of vast Destruction, are +yet beneath our sway. It is true we reign in horrible +agony; but spirits of our eminence prefer ruling in torment to +serving in ease. And besides this, we are on the eve of +obtaining another world, more than three parts of the earth +having been beneath my banner for a long time.</p> +<p>“And although the Almighty Enemy, sent his own son to +die for the beings of that world; yet I, by my baubles, <!-- page +90--><a name="page90"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +90</span>obtain ten souls, for every one which he obtains by his +crucified son. And although I have not been able to reach +him, who sits in the high places and discharges the invincible +thunderbolts, yet revenge of some kind is sweet. Let us +complete the destruction of the remnant of human beings, still in +the favour of our destroyer. I remember the time, when you +caused them to be burnt by multitudes and cities, and even the +whole race of the earth, by means of the flood, to be swept down +to us in the fire. But at present, though your strength and +your natural cruelty are not a whit diminished, yet you are +become in some degree inactive; if that had not been the case, we +might long since have destroyed the few who are godly, and have +caused the earth to be united with this our vast empire. +But know, ye black ministers of my displeasure, that unless ye be +more resolute and more diligent, and make the most of the short +time which yet remains to you for doing evil, ye shall experience +the weight of my anger, in torments new and strange to the oldest +of you. This I swear by the deepest Hell, and the vast, +eternal pit of Darkness.” And, thereupon, he frowned, +till the palace became seven times more gloomy than before.</p> +<p>Moloch now arose, one of the infernal potentates, and after +making his obeisance to the king, he said, “O emperor of +the Air! mighty ruler of Darkness! no one ever doubted my +propensity to malice and cruelty; the sufferings of others have +been, and still are, my supreme delight. It is as capital +sport to me, to hear the shrieks of infants perishing in the fire +as of old, when thousands of sucklings were sacrificed to me +outside of Jerusalem. When was I ever slack at my +work? Since the return of the crucified Enemy to the +supreme abodes, I have employed myself in slaying and burning his +subjects. <!-- page 91--><a name="page91"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 91</span>I did all I could, to destroy the +Christians from the face of the earth, during the reigns of ten +emperors; and many an awful butchery I have made of them in +modern times, both in Paris and England, to say nothing of other +places: but what are we the nearer to our object for all +this? The One above has caused the tree to grow, after its +branches have been severed; and all our efforts, are nothing +better than showing one’s teeth, without the power of +biting.” “Pshaw!” said Lucifer, “a +fig for such heartless legions as ye. I will no longer rely +upon you! I will do the work myself, and the glory thereof +I will share with no one. I will go to the earth in my own +kingly person, and will swallow up the whole; not one man, +henceforth, shall be found on the earth to adore the +Almighty.” Thereupon he gave a furious bound, +attempting to set off, in a firmament of living fire; but, +behold! the fist above his head shook the terrific bolt till he +trembled in the midst of his frenzy, and before he could move +far, an invisible hand lugged the old fox back by his chain, in +spite of his teeth. Whereupon he became seven times more +frantic; his eyes were more terrible than lightnings, black thick +smoke burst from his nostrils, and dark green flames from his +mouth and entrails: he gnawed his chain in his agony, and hissed +forth direful blasphemy, and the most frightful curses.</p> +<p>But perceiving how vain it was to seek to break loose, or to +struggle with the Almighty, he returned to his place and +proceeded with his discourse somewhat more calmly, but with ten +times more malice. “The Omnipotent Thunderer has +vanquished me, and he alone could have done so. To him I +submit. Against him all my fury is in vain; I will, +therefore, direct it against nearer and lower objects, and pour +it in showers upon those who are yet under my banner, and within +<!-- page 92--><a name="page92"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +92</span>the reach of my chain. Arise, ye ministers of +Destruction! rulers of the unquenchable fire! and as my wrath and +my venom flow forth and my malice boileth out, do ye assiduously +spread the whole tide amongst the damned, particularly the +Christians. Urge the instruments of torture to the +utmost—devise as many more as you can—double the fire +and the boiling, until the very cauldrons be overturned; and when +they are in the most extreme, inexpressible torture, mock, +deride, and upbraid them; and when your whole stock of ironry and +bitterness is expended, hasten to me, and you shall obtain +more.”</p> +<p>There had been for some time a comparative silence in Hell, +and the more cruel tortures had been suspended; but now the +stillness which Lucifer had caused was broken, when the ghastly +butchers rushed like wild hungry bears upon their +prisoners. O then there arose an oh! oh! oh! a wail, and +universal howling, more loud than the sound of cataracts, or the +tumult of an earthquake, so that Hell became seven times more +frightful. I should have swooned if my dear companion had +not rendered me assistance. “Take now,” said +he, “plenty of the water, that you may obtain strength to +see things yet more horrible than these.” But +scarcely had these words proceeded from his mouth, when, lo! the +celestial Justice, who sits above the precipice keeping the gate +of Hell, came scourging three men with a rod of fiery +scorpions. “Ha! ha!” said Lucifer, “here +are three right reverend gentlemen, whom Justice himself has +deigned to conduct to my kingdom.” “Oh! woe is +me,” said one of the three, “who asked him to trouble +himself?” “Be it known,” said Justice, +with a glance which made the devils tremble till they knocked one +against another, “that it is the will of the Great Creator, +<!-- page 93--><a name="page93"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +93</span>that I should myself bring these three accursed +murderers to their home. Sirrah,” said he to one of +the devils, “unbolt for me the prison of the murderers, +where are Cain and Nero, Bonner, Bradshaw, Ignatius, and +innumerable others of a similar description.” +“Alas, alas! we never killed any body,” said one of +the prisoners. “No, because you did not get time and +because you were prevented,” said Justice. When the +den was opened, there came out such a horrible puff of bloody +flame, and such a yell as if a thousand dragons were giving their +last gasp in their death agony. Into this den Justice +hurled his prisoners; <a name="citation93"></a><a +href="#footnote93" class="citation">[93]</a> and on his way back +he breathed obliquely, such a tempest of fiery whirlwinds upon +the Arch-Fiend and all his potentates, as he passed by them, that +Lucifer, Beelzebub, Satan, Moloch, Abaddon, Asmodeus, Dagon, +Apollyon, Belphegor, Mephistophiles, and all the other principal +demons were whisked away, and tumbled headlong into a kind of +gulf, which was opening and closing in the midst of the palace, +and whose aspect was more horrible, and whose steam was more +frightful than the aspect and vapour of any gulf which I had +previously seen. Before I could enquire of the angel as to +what it was, he said, “that is a hole which leads to +another vast world.” “Pray,” said I, +“what is the name of that world?” “It is +called,” said he, “Unknown, or extremest Hell, the +habitation of the devils, and the place to which they are at +present gone. The vast wilderness, over part of which you +have come, is called the country of Despair, a place intended for +the lost until the Day of Judgment, when it will fall into +extremest, bottomless Hell, and the two will become one. +When that has happened <!-- page 94--><a name="page94"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 94</span>one of ourselves will come and close +the gate of the whole region of horror upon the devils and the +damned, which gate shall never, to all eternity, be opened for +them. In the meantime, however, permission is given to the +devils to come to these cooler regions, in order to torment the +lost souls. Yea, they often obtain permission to go even +into the air, and about the earth, to tempt men to the +destructive paths, which lead to this dismal prison, from which +there is no escape.” In the midst of this history, +and whilst I was in great surprise at seeing the mouth of +Unknown, so much surpassing in horror the jaws of upper Hell, I +could hear a prodigious noise of arms, and loud discharges from +one side, answered by what seemed to be hoarse thunders from the +other; the rocks of Death, meanwhile, rebellowing the tumult.</p> +<p>“That is the sound of war,” said I. +“Is there war then in Hell?” “There +is,” said the angel; “and it is impossible that there +should not be here continual war.” Whilst we were +moving out, to see what was the matter, I beheld the mouth of +Unknown opening, and casting up thousands of candles, burning +with a frightful green flame. These were Lucifer and his +potentates, who had contrived to subdue the tempest. But +when the Arch Fiend heard the noise of war, he became more pale +than Death, and began to call and gather together bands of his +old experienced soldiers to quell the tumult. At this +moment he stumbled against a little puppy of an imp, who had +escaped between the feet of the combatants. “What is +the matter?” said the king. “Such a matter as +will endanger your crown, unless you look to yourself,” +said the imp. Close behind him came another fiendish +courier, bawling hoarsely, “you are plotting disquiet for +others, look now to your own repose. Yonder are the <!-- +page 95--><a name="page95"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +95</span>Turks, the Papists, and the bloody-handed Roundheads, in +three bands, filling all the plains of the dark abodes, +committing terrible outrages, and turning every thing +topsy-turvy.” “How came they out?” said +the Arch Fiend, looking worse than Demigorgon. “The +Papists,” said the messenger, “broke out of their +Purgatory, I do not know how; and then on account of an old +grudge, they went to attack the back gate of the Paradise of +Mahomet, and let all the Turks out of their prison; and +afterwards, in the hubbub, the seed of Cromwell found some means +to break out of their cells.” Then Lucifer turned +about and looked under his throne, where were all the lost kings, +and caused Cromwell to be kept close in his kennel; and likewise +all the emperors of the Turks, under watch and ward. He +then hastened with his legions along the black wilds of Darkness, +each obtaining light from the fire which was incessantly +tormenting his body. Guided by the horrid uproar, the +fiends advanced courageously towards the combatants; then silence +was enjoined in the name of the king, and Lucifer enquired, +“what is the cause of this disturbance in my +kingdom?” “Please, your infernal +majesty,” said Mahomet, “a dispute arose between me +and pope Leo, as to whether my Koran or the creed of Rome, had +rendered you most service; and whilst we were at it, a pack of +Roundheads broke their prison and put in their oar; asserting +that their league and covenant, deserved more respect at your +hands than either. Thus from disputing we have come to +blows, and from words to arms. But at present, as your +majesty has returned from Unknown, I will refer the matter to +yourself.” “Stay, we shall not let you escape +thus!” said pope Julius; and to it again they went, tooth +and nail, in the most furious manner, till the <!-- page 96--><a +name="page96"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 96</span>strokes were +like an earthquake. O you should have seen the three armies +of the damned, tearing one another to pieces over the expanse of +the burning plains; and each individual body that was rent to +pieces, becoming joined again serpent fashion. At last +Lucifer caused his old soldiers, the champions of Hell, to pull +them from each other, and it was no easy matter to do so.</p> +<p>When the tumult was hushed, pope Clement began to speak. +“O emperor of Horrors! as no throne has ever performed more +faithful and universal service to the infernal crown, over a +great part of the world, for eleven hundred years, than the papal +chair, I hope you will not suffer any one to contend with us for +your favour.” “Well,” said a Scott of +Cromwell’s army, “though the Koran has done great +service for eight hundred years, and the superstition of the Pope +for a much longer period, yet has the covenant done more since it +came out, than the other two have ever done. Moreover it is +notorious that, whilst the votaries of those two are every day +rapidly diminishing, the followers of the covenant are increasing +in numbers, over the whole face of the world, and particularly in +the island of your enemies Britain, whose capital, London, the +most noble city under the sun, abounds with them.” +“Pshaw, pshaw!” said Lucifer, “if I am rightly +informed, the covenant itself is under a cloud, and you are no +longer what you were. And now I have one thing to tell the +whole of you—which is, that, whatever ye may do in other +kingdoms, I will not permit you to trouble mine. Therefore +rest peaceably, under penalty of worse torments corporeal and +spiritual.” At those words many of the devils dropped +their tails between their hoofs, and all the damned sneaked away +to their holes, for fear of a change for the worse.</p> +<p><!-- page 97--><a name="page97"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +97</span>After causing the whole of them to be locked up in their +prisons, and the careless wardens to be deprived of their office, +for having permitted them to break out, Lucifer and his +counsellors returned to the palace, and sat down again, according +to their rank, upon their fiery thrones. After silence had +been called and the place cleared, a huge, wry-shouldered devil, +placed a back-load of fresh prisoners before the bar. +“Is this the road to Paradise,” said one, (for they +all pretended not to know where they were.) “Or if +this be Purgatory,” said another, “we have with us an +authority, under the hand of the Pope, to go straight to Paradise +without tarrying any where a minute. Therefore show us the +way, or, by the Pope’s toe, we will cause him to punish +you.” Ha! ha! ha!—ho! ho! ho! said eight +hundred devils; and Lucifer himself, parted his jaws half a yard +in a kind of bitter laugh. The others were confounded at +this; but one said, “well, if we have lost our way in the +darkness, we would pay any one who would guide us.” +“Ha! ha!” said Lucifer, “you will pay the last +farthing before ye go.” Thereupon each fell to +searching for his money, but found, to his sorrow, that he had +left his breeches behind him. Quoth the Arch Fiend, +“you left Paradise on the left hand, above the lofty +mountains; and, notwithstanding, it was so easy to come down +here, it is next to impossible to go back, owing to the nature of +the country, through which the road back lies. For it is a +country abounding with mountains of burning iron, immense dismal +crags, sheets of eternal ice, and roaring, headlong cataracts; a +country, in short, far too difficult for you to travel, unless +indeed you have talons of the true devilish length. Come, +come,” said he to his myrmidons, “take these +blockheads to our paradise, to their companions.” +<!-- page 98--><a name="page98"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +98</span>At this moment I could hear the voice of some people who +were coming, swearing and cursing in a frightful manner. +“O the Devil! the blood of the Devil! a hundred thousand +devils! a thousand million devils take me if I will go +farther!” but, nevertheless, they were cast slap down +before the judge. “Here you have,” said the +carrier, “a load of as good fire wood as the best in +Hell.” “What are they?” said +Lucifer. “Masters of the genteel art of cursing and +swearing,” replied the devil; “men who understand the +language of Hell quite as well as ourselves.” +“You lie in your mouth, by the Devil!” said one of +them. “Sirrah! do you take my name in vain?” +said the Arch Fiend. “Quick! and hang them by their +tongues to the burning precipice yonder, and if they call for the +Devil, be ready to serve them; yea, if they call for a thousand, +let them be satisfied.” When these were gone, lo! a +giant of a devil vociferated to have the bar cleared, and flung +down a man whom he bore. “What have you brought +there?” said Lucifer. “A tavern-keeper,” +replied the other. “What,” said the king, +“<i>one</i> tavern-keeper! Why they are in the habit +of coming to the tune of five or six thousand. Have you not +been out, sirrah, for ten years, and yet you bring us but one? +and he one who has done us much more service in the world than +yourself, you lazy, stinking dog!” “You are too +ready to condemn me, before listening to me,” he +replied. “This fellow only was given to my charge, +and, behold! I am clear of him. But still I have sent to +you from his house, many a worthless chap, after guzzling down +the maintenance of his family; many a dicer and card-player; many +a genteel swearer; many a pleasant, good kind of belly god; and +many a careless servant.” “Well,” said +the Arch Fiend, “though the tavern-keeper has merited to be +amongst <!-- page 99--><a name="page99"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 99</span>the flatterers below us, take him at +present to his brethren, in the cell of the liquid murderers; to +the thousands of apothecaries and poisoners, who are there for +making drink to kill their customers—boil him well for not +having brewed better ale.” “With your +permission,” said the tavern-keeper shivering, “I +have deserved no such treatment. Must not every trade +live?” “And could you not live,” said the +Fiend, “without encouraging dissipation and gaming, +uncleanness, drunkenness, oaths, quarrels, slander and lies? and +would you, hell-hound, live at present better than +ourselves! Pray what evil have we here that you had not at +home, the punishment solely excepted? And having told you +this bitter truth, I will add, that the infernal heat and cold +were not unknown to you either.</p> +<p>“Did you not see sparks of our fire in the tongues of +the swearers and of the scolds, when seeking to get their +husbands home? Was there not plenty of the unquenchable +fire in the mouth of the drunkard, and in the eyes of the +brawler? And could you not perceive something of the +infernal cold in the lovingness of the spendthrift, and in your +own civility to your customers, whilst any thing remained with +them—in the drollery of the buffoons, in the praise of the +envious and the backbiter, in the promises of the wanton, or in +the shanks of the good companions freezing beneath your +tables? Art thou unacquainted with Hell, when the house +thou didst keep was Hell? Go, hell-dog, to thy +punishment.”</p> +<p>At this moment appeared ten devils with their burdens, which +they cast upon the fiery floor, puffing terribly. +“What have you there?” said Lucifer. “We +have brought,” said one of the fiendish carriers, +“five things which were called kings the day before +yesterday.” (I looked attentively and <!-- page +100--><a name="page100"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +100</span>beheld in one of them old Louis of France.) +“Fling them here,” said the king; whereupon they were +flung to the other crowned heads, under the feet of Lucifer.</p> +<p>It was not long before I heard the sound of a brazen trumpet, +and a crying of room! room! room! After waiting a little +time, what should be coming but a drove of sessions folk, the +devils carrying six lumps of justices and a thousand of their +fry—consisting of lawyers, attornies, clerks, recorders, +bailiffs, catchpoles, and pettifoggers of the courts. I was +surprised that none of them attempted to cross-question; but they +perceived that the matter was gone against them too far, and so, +not one of these learned disputers opened his mouth; only a +pettifogger of the courts said, that he would lay a plaint of +false imprisonment against Lucifer. “You shall now +have cause enough to complain,” said the Fiend, “and +yet never have an opportunity of seeing a court with your +eyes.” Then, putting on his red cap, Lucifer, with an +arrogant, insufferable look, said, “take the justices to +the dungeon of Pontius Pilate and Mr. Bradshaw, who condemned +king Charles. Parch the lawyers in company with the +murderers of Sir Edmund Bury Godfrey, <a +name="citation100"></a><a href="#footnote100" +class="citation">[100]</a> and their double-tongued brethren, who +dispute with one another, for no other purpose than to be the +ruin of any one who comes betwixt them. Let them greet that +provident lawyer—for they will find him here—who +offered on his death bed a thousand pounds for a clear +conscience. Let them greet him, and ask, whether he is now +willing to give any thing more. Roast them with their own +parchment and papers; hang the pettifoggers above them, with +their nostrils downwards, in the <!-- page 101--><a +name="page101"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 101</span>roasting +chimneys, to receive the smoke, and to see whether they can get +their belly-full of law. As for the recorders, let them be +cast among the forestallers, who detain the corn or buy it up and +mix it, and then sell the unsound for double the price of the +pure corn; just as the former demand double the fees for +<i>wrong</i>, which were formerly given for <i>right</i>. +As for the catchpoles, leave them at liberty to hunt vermin; or +send them to the world, among the dingles and brakes, to seize +the debtors of the infernal crown—for what devil among you +will do the work better than they?” At this moment +twenty devils with packs on their shoulders, like Scotchmen, +mounted before the throne of Despair, and what had they got, on +enquiry, but gipsies. “Ho!” said Lucifer, +“how did ye know the fortunes of others so well, without +knowing that your own fortune was leading ye to this +prison.” But the gipsies said not a word in reply, +being confounded at beholding faces here more ugly than their +own. “Hurl them into our deepest dungeon,” said +Lucifer, to the fiends, “and don’t starve them; we +have here neither cats nor rush-lights to give them, but let them +have a toad between them, every ten thousand years, provided they +are quiet, and do not deafen us with their gibberish and +clibberty clabber.” Next to these there came, I +should imagine, about thirty husbandmen. Every one was +surprised to see so many of them, people of their honest calling +seldom coming to Hell; but they were not from the same +neighbourhood, nor for the same offences. Some were for +raising the markets; many for refusing to pay tithes, and +cheating the minister of his rights; others for leaving their +work, to follow gentry a hunting, and breaking their legs in +endeavouring to leap with them; some for working on Sundays; some +for carrying their sheep and cattle, in their <!-- page 102--><a +name="page102"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 102</span>heads to +church, instead of musing on the Word; others for roguish +bargains. When Lucifer began to question them, oh! they +were all as pure as gold; none was aware of having committed any +thing which deserved such a lot. You will not believe what +a crafty excuse every one had to conceal his fault, +notwithstanding he was in Hell on account of it, and this was +only done out of malice, to thwart Lucifer and to endeavour to +make the righteous Judge, who had damned them appear +unjust. But you would have been yet more surprised at the +dexterity with which the Arch Fiend laid bare their crimes, and +answered their vain excuses home. But when these were +receiving the last infernal sentence, there came forty scholars +before the court, mounted on capering devils, more ugly, if +possible, than Lucifer himself. And when the scholars heard +the husbandmen arguing, they began to excuse themselves the more +confidently. But, oh! how ready the old Serpent was at +answering them too, notwithstanding their craft, and their +learning.</p> +<p>But as it was my fortune to hear similar disputations at +another tribunal, I will there give the history of the whole, in +one mass; and will at present relate to you what I next +saw. Scarcely had Lucifer uttered judgment upon these +people, and sent them, for the cool impertinence of their +reasons, to the vast sheet, in the country of the eternal ice, +the teeth of the wretches beginning to chatter before they saw +their prison, when Hell began once more, to resound awfully with +terrible blows, harsh blustering thunders, and every sound of +war. I could see Lucifer turn black, and become like a +statue; at this moment, in rushed a little crooked, horned devil, +panting and shivering. “What is the matter?” +said Lucifer. “The most perilous to you of all +matters since Hell <!-- page 103--><a name="page103"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 103</span>has been Hell,” said the imp; +“all the extremes of the kingdom of Darkness, have broken +out against you, and against one another; particularly those who +had any old field in common. They are now at it, tooth and +nail, so that it is impossible to tear them from each other.</p> +<p>“The soldiers are at loggerheads with the physicians, +for carrying on their trade of slaughter; there is a swarm of +usurers at loggerheads with the lawyers, for seeking to spoil +their trade; the jurymen and the duffers are pummelling the +gentlemen, for swearing and cursing without necessity; whereas, +swearing and cursing formed part of their trade; the harlots, and +their associates, and millions of other old friends and +acquaintances, have fallen out, and are all in shatters.</p> +<p>“But worse than all, is the contest between the old +misers and their own children, for dissipating their wealth and +their money. ‘Our property,’ say the pigtails, +‘cost us much pain, whilst we were upon the earth, and is +causing us immense suffering <i>here</i> for ever, yet ye have +flung it all away at ducks and drakes.’ And the +children, on the other hand, are cursing and tearing the old +skin-flints, most furiously, charging their fathers with being +the authors of their misery, by leaving them twenty times <i>too +much</i>, to distract them with pride and dissipation; whereas, a +<i>little</i>, with a blessing, might have made them happy in +both their states of existence.” “Well,” +said Lucifer, “enough! enough! we have more need of arms +than words. Sirrah, this hubbub is owing to some great +neglect; go back, and pry into every watch, and discover who has +been neglectful; and what dangerous characters have been +permitted to escape, for there are some evils abroad, that are +not known.” Away <!-- page 104--><a +name="page104"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 104</span>he went, at +the word, and in the meanwhile, Lucifer and his potentates arose +in terror, and exceeding consternation, and caused the boldest +bands of the black angels to be assembled. When these were +marshalled, he put himself at the head of his own peculiar band, +and marched forth to quell the insurrection, whilst the +potentates went other ways with their legions.</p> +<p>Before the royal troop had gone any great distance, gleaming +like the lightning of the black abodes, (and we behind them,) +behold the hubbub advanced to meet them. “Silence, in +the name of the king,” said a fiendish herald. There +was no hearing; it was easier to tear the old crocodile from his +prey than one of these.</p> +<p>But when the old tried soldiers of Lucifer broke into the +midst of them, the buzzing, the butting, and the blows began to +slacken. “Silence, in the name of Lucifer,” +said the hoarse cryer again. “What is the +matter?” said the king; “and who are +these?” “There is nothing particularly the +matter,” was the answer; “but the drovers, happening +in the general commotion to come in contact with the cuckolds, +they went mutually to butting, to try whose horns were hardest; +and this butting might have gone on for ever, if your horned +champions had not interfered.” “Well,” +said Lucifer, “since you are all so ready with your arms, +turn along with me to quell other rioters.” But when +it was buzzed about among the other rebels, that Lucifer was +coming with three horned legions against them, each slunk away to +his lair.</p> +<p>Thus Lucifer advanced without opposition, along the +wildernesses of Destruction, endeavouring to ascertain what was +the commencement of the disturbance, but could obtain no +information. After a little time, however, one of the spies +<!-- page 105--><a name="page105"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +105</span>of the king returned, quite out of breath. +“O most noble Lucifer!” said he, “prince Moloch +has quieted part of the North and has scattered thousands over +the sheets of ice; but three or four terrible evils are still out +on the wind.” “Who are they?” said +Lucifer. “<i>Slanderer</i>, and <i>Meddler</i>, and +<i>Litigious Pettifogger</i>,” said he, “have broken +their prisons and are at liberty.” “Then it +would be no wonder,” said the Arch Fiend, “if there +should be yet more disturbance.”</p> +<p>At this moment there came another, who had been on the +look-out towards the South, with the information that the evil +had begun to break out there; but that three had been taken, who +had previously turned every thing topsy-turvy in the West, and +these three were <i>Madam Bouncer</i>, <i>Contriver</i>, and<i> +Coxcomb</i>. “Well,” said Satan, who was +standing next but one to Lucifer, “since I tempted Adam +from his garden, I have never yet seen from his seed, so many +evils out upon one piece of business.</p> +<p>“Bouncer, Coxcomb, and Contriver on the one side,” +he added, “and on the other Slanderer, Pettifogger, and +Meddler are a compound, enough to make a thousand devils sweat +their bowels out.” “It is no wonder,” +said Lucifer, “that they are so detested by every body on +earth, when they are able to cause us so much trouble +here.” A little farther on, a great bouncing lady +struck against the king, as she was moving backwards. +“Ho! my aunt of the breeches,” said a hoarse devil, +“good night to you.” “Yes, your aunt, +indeed! on what side pray?” said she, very wrathful, +because she was not called madam.</p> +<p>“A pretty king are you, sir Lucifer,” said she, +“to keep such unmannerly blockheads; it is a sin that so +large a kingdom should be under one so incompetent to govern +them. <!-- page 106--><a name="page106"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 106</span>O that I were made deputy over +it!” At this moment behold the <i>Coxcomb</i>, +nodding his head in the dark, “Your servant, sir,” he +would say to one over his shoulder.—“I hope you are +quite well,” said he to another.—“Is there any +service which I can render you,” to a third, smiling +conceitedly.—“Your beauty ravishes my heart,” +said he to the bouncing wench. “Oh! oh! away with +this hell-dog,” said she; whilst every one cried, +“away with this new tormentor! Hell upon Hell is +he!” “Bind him and her head to tail,” +said Lucifer.</p> +<p>After a little time, behold <i>Courts Comprised</i> held +betwixt two devils. “O ho! angel of patience,” +said Lucifer, “are you come? Hold him fast on your +peril,” said he to the satellites. Before we had +advanced far, there came the <i>Contriver</i> and the +<i>Slanderer</i> bound betwixt forty devils, and whispering in +each others ears. “O most mighty Lucifer!” said +the <i>Contriver</i>, “I am exceedingly grieved to see so +much disturbance in your dominions, but I will teach you a way to +prevent such in future, if you will but grant me a hearing. +You only need, under pretence of a general parliament, to summon +all the damned to the glowing pandemonium, and then cause the +devils to cast them headlong into the throat of <i>Unknown</i>, +and the gulf to be closed over them, and then, I warrant you, +they will give you no more trouble.” +“See,” said Lucifer, frowning very horribly on the +<i>Contriver</i>, “the universal Meddler is still +behind.” On returning again to the porch of the +infernal palace, who should come with the fairest face imaginable +to meet the king but the <i>Meddler</i>. “O my +liege,” said he, “I have a word for you.” +“Perhaps I have one or two for you,” said the +Fiend. “I have been,” continued the Meddler, +“over half <i>Destruction</i>, to observe how your affairs +are standing. You have many officers in the East doing <!-- +page 107--><a name="page107"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +107</span>nothing at all; but sitting still instead of looking to +the torments of their prisoners, or keeping guard over them, and +this has been the cause of all this great disturbance. +Besides,” said he, “many of your devils, and your +damned too, whom you dispatched to the world to tempt folks, are +not returned, though their time is out; and others have arrived +in a sculking manner, and not given an account of their +errands.”</p> +<p>Then Lucifer caused the herald to proclaim another parliament; +and lo! before you could turn your hand, all the potentates and +satellites were met together, to hold the infernal sessions +again. The first thing which was done was to change the +officers, and to cause a place to be made about the throat of +Unknown, for the reception of the Coxcomb, the bouncing lady, and +the rest; the two first were tied nose to nose, and the other +rioters tail to tail. Then a law was promulgated, that +whoever should henceforth neglect his duty, whether imp or lost +man, should be cast there among them until the day of +judgment. At these words you might see all the +goblins—yea, Lucifer himself—tremble and look +agitated. The next thing was to call some devils and some +damned to reckoning, who had been sent to the world to hunt up +recruits: the devils gave a very good account of themselves; but +some of the damned were lame in their reckoning, and were sent to +the hot school, where they were scourged with twisted fiery +serpents, for not learning their lesson better.</p> +<p>“Hear my complaint,” said a little informing +devil. “Here is a pretty woman when trimmed out, who +was sent up to the world, to hunt subjects for you by means of +their hearts; and to whom did she offer herself, but to a +hard-working labourer coming home late from his occupation, who +<!-- page 108--><a name="page108"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +108</span>instead of enjoying himself with her, went upon his +knees to pray against the Devil and his angels: at another time, +she went to a sick man.” “Ha!” said +Lucifer, “cast her to that lost useless wench, who loved of +yore Einion ab Gwalehmai, <a name="citation108"></a><a +href="#footnote108" class="citation">[108]</a> of +Anglesey.” “Stay,” said the fair one, +“this is but the first offence. It is not yet above a +year, since the day when I breathed my last, and was damned to +your accursed government.” “She speaks true, O +king of Torments! It is not yet a year by three +weeks,” said the devil who had brought her there. +“Therefore,” said she, “how would you have me +so well versed as the damned, who have been here for three +hundred, or out abroad depredating for five hundred years. +If you desire from me better service, let me go into the world +another time or two unchastised; and if I do not bring you twenty +harlot-mongers, for every year that I am out, inflict upon me +whatever punishment you please.” But the verdict went +against her, and she was condemned to punishment for a hundred +long years, that she might remember better the second time.</p> +<p>At this moment, behold another devil pushing a fellow +forward. “Here you have,” said he, “a +pretty dog of a messenger. As he was prowling about his old +neighbourhood, above stairs, the other night, he saw a thief +going to steal a stallion, and could not so much as help him to +catch the horse without showing himself, frightening the thief so +by his horrible appearance, that he took warning and became an +honest man from that time.” “With the +permission of the court,” said the fellow, “if the +thief had got the gift from <!-- page 109--><a +name="page109"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +109</span><i>above</i> to see me, could I help it? But at +worst this is a single peccadillo,” said he; “it is +not above a hundred years since the day which terminated my +mortal career, yet how many of my friends and neighbours have I +not tempted hither after me, during that time? May I be in +the deepest pit, if I have not as much inclination for the trade +as the best of you; but now and then the craftiest will +err.” “Here,” said Lucifer, “cast +him to the school of the fairies, who are yet under the rod for +their mischievous conduct of old, in strangling some people and +threatening others; startling by such behaviour their neighbours +from their heedlessness, upon whom the terror which they caused, +had probably more effect than twenty sermons would have +had.”</p> +<p>Next appeared four catchpoles, an informer, and fifteen +damned, hauling two <i>devils</i> forward. +“See,” said the informer, “lest you should lay +the blame of all that is mismanaged on the seed of Adam, we bring +you two of your old angels, who have spent their time above, +quite as badly as the two preceding. Here is a fellow who +has been making as great a fool of himself, as the Devil did at +Shrewsbury the other day; who, in the midst of the interlude of +Doctor Faustus, whilst some, according to the custom on such +occasions, were committing adultery with their eyes, some with +their hands, others making assignations for the same purpose, and +doing various other things profitable to your kingdom, made his +appearance to play his own part; by which blunder, he drove every +one from taking his pleasure to praying. In like manner did +this numskull act; for, whilst journeying over the world, on +hearing two wenches talking of walking round the church at night, +in order to see their sweethearts, he must needs show himself in +the figure he wears at home, to the <!-- page 110--><a +name="page110"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 110</span>two fools, +who on recovering their senses, which at first they lost from +fright, solemnly abjured all frivolity for ever. +There’s a ninny-hammer for you! Instead of appearing +like a devil, he ought to have divided himself and assumed the +forms of two dirty, unlicked boors; for the girls would have +imagined themselves bound to accept them, and then the filthy +goblin might have lived as husband with the two female parties, +without troubling a clergyman to perform the marriage.</p> +<p>“And here is another,” said he, “who went +the last dark night, to visit two young maidens in Wales, who +were <i>turning the shift</i>; and instead of enticing the girls +to wantonness in the figure of a handsome youth, he must needs go +to one with a <i>hearse</i> to sober her; and to the other with +the <i>sound of war</i> in an infernal whirlwind, to drive her +farther from her senses than she was before, and there was no +need for that. But this is not the whole, for after going +into the last girl, he cast her down and tormented her furiously, +so that her parents in horror, sent for some of our enemies the +clergy, to pray over her and cast him out, which they did. +Now, if he had been wise, instead of kicking up such a hubbub, he +would have tempted her quietly to despair, and to make away with +herself. On another time, wishing to gain some of the +conventiclers, he went to preach to them, and revealed the +secrets of your kingdom; thus, instead of hindering, assisting +their salvation.” At the word <i>salvation</i>, I +could see some emitting living fire for madness. +“Capital stories both, I won’t deny,” said the +goblin; “but I hope that Lucifer will not permit one of +Adam’s race of dirt, to put himself on an equality with me +who am an angel, of a species and descent far +superior.” “Ha!” said Lucifer, “he +may be <!-- page 111--><a name="page111"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 111</span>sure of his punishment. But, +sirrah, answer to these accusations speedily and clearly, or by +hopeless Destruction I will—” “I have +brought hither,” said the goblin, “many a soul since +Satan was in the garden of Eden, and ought to know my trade +better than this novice of an informer.” “Blood +of an infernal fire-brand!” said Lucifer, “did I not +command you to answer speedily and clearly.” +“Do but hear me,” said the sprite. “As to +preaching, by your own command I have been a hundred times +<i>preaching</i>, and have forbidden people to follow several of +the roads which lead to your territories, and yet silently, in +the same breath, have led them hither safe enough, by some other +vain paths; as I have done by preaching lately in Germany, and in +one of the Faroe isles, and various other places.</p> +<p>“Thus through my preaching,” he continued, +“have come many of the <i>superstitions</i> of the papists, +and the <i>old fables</i> first to the world, and the whole under +the shape of some goodness. For who ever swallows the hook +without some bait? who ever would believe a story if there were +not some measure of <i>truth</i> mingled with the falsehood; or +some semblance of <i>good</i> to shade the <i>evil</i>? +Thus if I find an opportunity in preaching, to push in amongst a +hundred correct and salutary counsels, one of my own, with this +one I will do you, either through <i>contentiousness</i> or +<i>superstition</i>, more advantage than all the rest of my +counsels will do you harm.” “Well,” said +Lucifer, “since you are of such utility in your pulpit, I +order you for seven years, to take up your abode in the mouth of +one of the barn-preachers, who will be sure to utter the first +thing which comes to his tongue’s end. Then you will +find an opportunity to put in a word now and then, to your own +purpose.”</p> +<p><!-- page 112--><a name="page112"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +112</span>There were still many more devils and damned who were +twisting through one another like lightning, around the throne of +Terrors, to give an account of what they had done, and again to +receive commissions. But suddenly and unexpectedly, an +order was given to all the messengers and the prisoners, to go +out of the palace, every one to his hole, and to leave the king +and his chief counsellors there alone. “Had we not +best depart,” said I to my companion, “lest they +should find us?” “You need not fear,” +said the angel “no unclean spirit will ever see through +this veil.” Thus we continued there invisible, to see +what was the matter. Then Lucifer began to speak graciously +to his counsellors, in this manner:—“O ye, the chief +spiritual evils!—ye, who for subtlety are unequalled in +Unknown, I request you in my need, to exert to the uttermost your +malicious wiles. No one here is unaware, that Britain and +the surrounding isles, constitute the kingdom most dangerous to +my authority, and most abounding with my enemies; and what is a +hundred times worse, there is at present there a queen, who does +not offer to turn once hitherward, either by the road of Rome on +the one hand, or the road of Geneva on the other. +Notwithstanding, all the service which the Pope has rendered us +there for a long time, and Oliver for some years past, how far +are we from our object? what shall we do now? I am afraid +that we shall lose there our ancient possession, and our market +entirely, if we do not pave immediately some new way for its +inhabitants to walk in, for they know all the old roads which +lead hither too well. And, since yonder invincible fist +shortens my chain, and prevents me from going myself to the +earth, counsel me, I pray you, as to whom I shall make my deputy, +to oppose yonder detestable queen, <!-- page 113--><a +name="page113"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 113</span>who is the +deputy of our enemy.” “O mighty emperor of +Darkness!” said Cerberus, the devil of Tobacco, “make +a deputy of me, from whom the crown of Britain derives the third +part of its revenue. I will go and will send to you a +hundred thousand of the souls of your enemies, through the hollow +of a pipe.” “Well, well,” said Lucifer, +“you have done me excellent service, by causing the +proprietors of tobacco in India to be slaughtered, and those who +take it to die of diseases, and sending many to vend it idly from +house to house, and making others to steal in order to obtain it, +and thousands to love it so far, that they cannot be a day +without it in their right senses.</p> +<p>“Therefore go and do thy best; but, I tell thee, that +thou art little better than nothing in the present +exigency.” Thereupon Cerberus sat down, and uprose +Mammon, devil of Money, and with a morose sinister look +said:—“I showed men the first mine from which they +got money, and therefore, I am always extolled and worshipped +more than God; men undergo for me trouble and danger, and place +their whole mind, their delight, and their trust upon me: there +is no one easy, because he has not obtained somewhat more of my +favour, and the more they obtain the farther are they ever from +rest, until at length by seeking <i>easy circumstances</i>, they +arrive at the country of Eternal Torments. How many a +crafty old miser have I not deluded hither, along paths more +difficult than those which lead to the kingdom of +Happiness? At fair or market, sessions or elections, or any +other assemblage of people, who has more subjects? who has more +power and authority than I? Cursing, swearing, fighting, +litigating, plotting, deceiving, striking, hoarding, murdering +and robbing, sabbath breaking and uncharitableness, all proceed +from me: <!-- page 114--><a name="page114"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 114</span>and there is no other black mark, +which stamps men as belonging to the fold of Lucifer, which I +have not a hand in giving, on which account I am called +‘the root of all evil.’ Therefore if it seem +good to your majesty, I will go.” And having said +that he sat down.</p> +<p>Then arose Apollyon. “I do not know,” said +he, “any thing that will bring the Britons hither, more +certainly than what brought yourselves—that is +<i>Pride</i>: if she ever plant her pole within them and inflate +them, there is no reason to fear that they will stoop to lift the +cross, or go through the narrow gate. I will go,” +said he, “with my daughter Pride, and will cause the Welsh, +by gazing on the magnificence of the English, and the English, by +imitating the frivolities of the French, to tumble into this +place before they know where they are.”</p> +<p>Next arose Asmodeus, devil of Wantonness. “You +cannot but be aware,” said he, “O most mighty +sovereign of the Abyss! and you, ye princes of the country of +Despair! how I have crammed the nooks of Hell through debauchery +and lasciviousness. What need have I to speak of the time, +when I kindled such a flame of lust in the whole world, that it +was necessary to send the flood, to clear the earth of its +inhabitants, and to sweep them to us in the unquenchable fire; or +of Sodom and Gomorrah, fair and pleasant cities, whose people I +burnt with wantonness, till their infernal lusts brought down a +fiery shower, which drove them hither alive to burn to all +eternity; or of the vast army of the Assyrians, which was slain +all in one night on account of me? Sarah I disappointed of +seven husbands; Solomon, the wisest of men, and many thousand +other kings I blinded by means of women. Therefore,” +said he, “suffer me to go with my <!-- page 115--><a +name="page115"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 115</span><i>sweet +sin</i>, and I will kindle in Britain the sparks of Hell so +universally, that it shall become one with this place of +unextinguishable flame; for there is not much chance, that any +one will return from following me, to lay hold of the paths of +Life.” And thereupon he sat down.</p> +<p>Then arose Belphegor, prince of <i>Sloth and +Idleness</i>. “I am,” said he, “the great +prince of Listlessness and Laziness; great is my power on myriads +of men of all ages and degrees. I am the still pool, where +‘the root of all evil’ is generated; where coagulate +the dregs of all destructive corruption and filthiness. +What would you be worth, Asmodeus; or you, ye other master +spirits of evil, without me who keep the window open for you, +without any watch, so that you may go into man by his eyes, by +his ears, by his mouth, and by every other orifice which he has, +whensoever you please. I will go, and will roll to you all +the inhabitants of Britain over the precipice in their +sleep.”</p> +<p>Then arose Satan, the devil of <i>Deceit</i>, who sat next to +Lucifer on his left hand, and after turning a frightful visage on +the king,—“It is unnecessary for me,” he said, +“to declare my deeds to you, O lost archangel! or to you, +black princes of Destruction! because it was I who struck the +first blow which man ever received; and a mighty blow it was, +causing him to remain <i>mortal</i>, from the beginning of the +world to its end. Do you imagine that I, who despoiled the +whole world, cannot at present give counsel which will serve for +a paltry islet? And cannot I, who cheated <i>Eve</i> in +<i>Paradise</i>, vanquish <i>Anne</i> in <i>Britain</i>? If +no natural craft will avail, and continued experience for more +than five thousand years, my counsel to you is, to dress up your +daughter <i>Hypocrisy</i>, to deceive Britain and its queen; you +have not a daughter in <!-- page 116--><a +name="page116"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 116</span>the world, +so useful to you as she; she has more extensive authority and +more numerous subjects, than all your other daughters. Was +it not through <i>her</i> that I cheated the first woman? +It was: and ever from that time she has remained and increased +exceedingly upon the earth. At present indeed, the whole +vast world is but one <i>Hypocrisy</i>; and if it were not for +the skill of Hypocrisy, how should any one of us do business in +any corner of the world? Because if people were to see +<i>sin</i> in its own <i>color</i>, and under its own +<i>name</i>, who would ever come in contact with it? The +world would no more do so, than it would embrace the Devil in his +infernal shape and garb. If Hypocrisy were not able to +disguise her <i>name</i>, and the <i>nature</i> of every +<i>evil</i>, under the similitude of some <i>good</i>, and were +not able to give some evil nickname to all <i>goodness</i>, no +one would approach, and no one would covet evil at all. +Traverse the whole city of Destruction, and you will see her in +every corner. Go to the street of <i>Pride</i>, and enquire +for an <i>arrogant man</i>, or for a pennyworth of +<i>coquetry</i>, mixed up by Pride; ‘woe’s me,’ +says Hypocrisy, ‘there is no such thing here; nothing at +all I assure you in the whole street but grandeur.’ +Or go to the street of <i>Lucre</i>, and enquire for the house of +the <i>Miser</i>; fie, there is no such person in it: or for the +house of the <i>murderer</i> amongst the physicians: or the house +of the <i>arrant thief</i> amongst the drovers, and see how you +would fare; you would sooner get into prison for enquiring, than +get any body to confess his name. Yes, Hypocrisy creeps +between man and his own heart, and conceals every <i>iniquity</i> +so craftily, under the name and similitude of some virtue, that +she has made every body almost unable to recognise himself. +<i>Avarice</i> she will call <i>economy</i>. In her +language <i>dissipation</i> is <i>innocent diversion</i>; +<i>pride</i> is <i>gentility</i>; a <i>perverse</i> <!-- page +117--><a name="page117"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +117</span><i>man </i>is a <i>fine manly fellow</i>; +<i>drunkenness</i> is <i>good fellowship</i>, and <i>adultery</i> +is only the <i>heat of youth</i>. On the other hand, if +<i>she</i> and her disciples are to be believed, the <i>devout +man</i> is only a <i>hypocrite</i> or a <i>blockhead</i>; the +<i>gentle</i> but a <i>sneaking dog</i>; the <i>sober</i> a mere +<i>hunks</i>, and so on. Send her, therefore,” he +continued, “thither, in her full array, I will warrant that +she will deceive every body, and that she will blind the +counsellors and the warriors, and all the officers, secular and +ecclesiastical, and will draw them hither in multitudes +presently, by means of her <i>mask of changeable +hue</i>.” And thereupon he sat down.</p> +<p>Then Beelzebub arose, the devil of <i>Inconsiderateness</i>, +and with a rough, bellowing voice,—“I am,” said +he, “the mighty prince of <i>Bewilderment</i>; to me it +pertains to prevent man from reflecting upon and considering his +condition. I am the principal of those wicked, infernal +<i>flies</i> which craze mankind, by keeping them ever in a kind +of continual buzz, about their possessions or their pleasures, +without ever leaving them with my consent, a moment’s +respite, to think about their courses or their end. It ill +becomes one of you, to attempt to put himself on an equality with +me, for feats useful to the kingdom of Darkness. For what +is Tobacco but one of my meanest instruments, to carry +bewilderment into the brain? And what is the kingdom of +<i>Mammon</i>, but a branch of my vast domain? Yea, if I +were to recite the ties which I have on the subjects of +<i>Mammon</i> and <i>Pride</i>—yea, and on the subjects of +<i>Asmodeus</i>, <i>Belphegor</i>, and <i>Hypocrisy</i>—no +man would tarry a minute longer under the rule of one of +them. Therefore,” said he, “I am the one to do +the work, and let none of you boast again about his +merits.” Then Lucifer the Great arose himself from +his burning throne, and with a would-be complaisant but +nevertheless frightful look on both <!-- page 118--><a +name="page118"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +118</span>sides,—“Ye master-spirits of eternal Night! +ye supreme possessors of the cunning of Despair!” he said, +“though the vast black gulf and the wilds of Destruction, +are indebted to no one for inhabitants, more than to my own royal +majesty since I of yore, failing to drag the Omnipotent from his +possession, drew millions of you, my swarthy angels to this place +of horrors, and have since drawn millions of men to you; +nevertheless, it cannot be denied, that ye too have all done your +part, to sustain this vast infernal empire.”</p> +<p>Then Lucifer began to answer them one by one. “For +one of late origin, I will not deny, O <i>Cerberus</i>, that thou +hast brought to us many a booty from the island of our enemies, +by means of tobacco, a weed the cause of much deceit; for how +much deceit is practiced in carrying it about, in mixing it, and +in weighing it: a weed which entices some people to bib ale; +others to curse, swear, and to flatter in order to obtain it, and +others to tell lies in denying that they use it: a weed +productive of maladies in various bodies, the excess of which is +injurious to every man’s body, without speaking of his +<i>soul</i>: a weed, moreover, by which we get multitudes of the +poor, whom we should never get, did they not set their love on +tobacco, and allow it to master them, and pull the bread from the +mouths of their children.</p> +<p>“And as for you, my brother <i>Mammon</i>, your power is +so universal, and likewise so manifest upon the earth, that it +has become a proverb that ‘<i>any thing can be got for +money</i>.’ And undoubtedly,” said he, turning +to Apollyon, “my beloved daughter <i>Pride</i> is of great +utility to us; for what is more capable of injuring a man in his +condition, his body, and his soul, than that <i>proud</i>, +<i>haughty idea</i>, which will make him squander a <i>hundred +pounds</i> for display, rather than stoop to <!-- page 119--><a +name="page119"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 119</span>give a +<i>crown</i> for peace. <i>She</i> keeps people so +stiff-necked, with their sight so intent on lofty things, that it +is a pleasure to see them, by staring and reaching into the air, +falling plump into the abysses of Hell. As for you, +<i>Asmodeus</i>, we all remember your great services of yore; no +one keeps his prisoners more firmly under the lock, and no one +meets with less rebuke than yourself—the whole rebuke, +indeed, consisting in a little laughing, at what is called wanton +tricks. Yes, Asmodeus, I admit that your power is very +great; though I cannot help reminding you,” he added, with +a jocular though truly infernal grin, “that you were all +but starved, above there, during the last dear years. As +for you, my son <i>Belphegor</i>, lousy prince of Sloth, nobody +has afforded us more pleasure than yourself, so very great is +your authority amongst gentle and simple, even down to the +beggar. Nevertheless, if it were not for the skill of my +daughter <i>Hypocrisy</i>, in coloring and disguising, who would +ever swallow one of your hooks? And after all, if it were +not for the diligent firmness of my brother <i>Beelzebub</i>, in +keeping men in <i>inconsiderate bewilderment</i>, I question +whether all of you united would be worth a straw. +Now,” said he, “let us review the whole.</p> +<p>“What would you be worth, Cerberus, with your excessive +sucking, if it were not for the assistance of Mammon? What +merchant would ever fetch your leaves from India, through so many +perils, if it were not for the sake of Mammon? And if it +were not for <i>his</i> sake, what king would receive it, in +Britain especially? And who, but for the sake of Mammon, +would carry it to every corner of the kingdom? But, +notwithstanding this, what wouldst thou be worth, Mammon, without +Pride to squander thee upon fine houses, magnificent garments, +needless litigations, music, horses and <!-- page 120--><a +name="page120"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 120</span>costly +appurtenances, various dishes, beer and ale in a flood, far above +the <i>means</i> and <i>rank</i> of the possessor; for if money +were used within the limits of <i>necessity</i> and +<i>propriety</i>, of what advantage would Mammon be to us? +Thus you would be worth nothing without <i>Pride</i>; and little +would <i>Pride</i> be worth without <i>Wantonness</i>, because +bastards are the most numerous and the fiercest subjects, which +my daughter <i>Pride</i> possesses in the world.</p> +<p>“You too, Asmodeus, prince of <i>Wantonness</i>, what +would you be worth, if it were not for <i>Sloth and Idleness</i>; +where but for them would you get a night’s lodging? +You could hardly expect it from a labourer or toiling +student. And you, Belphegor of Idleness, who would welcome +you a minute, attended as you would be with shame and reproach, +if it were not for Hypocrisy, who conceals your ugliness under +the name of <i>internal sickness</i>, or of a <i>well meaning +person</i>, or under the shape of <i>despising riches</i> and the +like.</p> +<p>“And she too, my dear daughter <i>Hypocrisy</i>, what is +she worth, or what would she ever be worth, skilful and resolute +sempstress as she is, if it were not for your help, my eldest +brother <i>Beelzebub</i>, mighty prince of +<i>Inconsiderateness</i>. If he would leave people leisure +and respite, to seriously consider the nature of things and their +difference, how often would they spy holes in the folds of the +gold-cloth robe of <i>Hypocrisy</i>, and perceive the hooks +through the bait? What man, did not Inconsiderateness +deprive him of his senses, would chase baubles and +pleasures—evanescent, surfeiting, foolish and +disgraceful—and prefer them to <i>peace of conscience</i>, +and glorious <i>everlasting happiness</i>? And who would +hesitate to suffer martyrdom for his faith, for an hour or a day, +or to endure affliction for forty or sixty years, if he would +reflect that his <!-- page 121--><a name="page121"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 121</span>neighbours here are suffering in an +hour, more than he can ever suffer upon the earth?</p> +<p>“<i>Tobacco</i> then is nothing without <i>money</i>, +nor money without <i>Pride</i>; and Pride is but feeble without +Wantonness, and Wantonness is nothing without <i>Idleness</i>; +Idleness without <i>Hypocrisy</i>, and Hypocrisy without +<i>Inconsiderateness</i>. But,” said Lucifer, (and he +raised his fiendish hoofs on the fore claws,) “to speak my +own opinion, however excellent all these may be, I have a +<i>friend</i> to send against the she-enemy of Britain, better +than the whole.”</p> +<p>Then I could see all the chief devils, with their ghastly +mouths opened towards Lucifer, in anxious expectation of learning +what this friend might be, whilst I was as impatient to hear as +they. “The one I allude to,” said Lucifer, +“is called <i>Ease</i>; she is one whose merits I have too +long disregarded, and whose merit, Satan, you yourself +disregarded of yore, when in tempting Job you turned the +unpleasant side of life towards him. She is my darling, and +her I now constitute deputy, immediately next to myself, in all +matters relating to my earthly government; Ease is her name, and +<i>she</i> has damned more men than all ye together, and very few +would ye catch without <i>her</i>. For in <i>war</i>, <i>or +danger</i>, <i>or hunger</i>, <i>or sickness</i>, who would value +<i>tobacco</i>, <i>or money</i>, or the pomposity of Pride, or +would entertain a thought of welcoming either <i>Wantonness or +Sloth</i>? Or who in such straits, would permit themselves +to be distracted either by <i>Hypocrisy or +Inconsiderateness</i>? No, no! they are too awake then, and +not one of the infernal <i>flies of Bewilderment</i>, which shows +its beak, will buzz, during one of these storms. But +<i>Ease</i>, smooth Ease, is the nurse of you all: in her calm +shadow, and in her teeming bosom ye are all bred, and also every +other infernal <!-- page 122--><a name="page122"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 122</span>worm of the conscience, which will +come to gnaw its possessor <i>here</i> for ever, without +intermission.</p> +<p>“As long as <i>Ease</i> lasts, there is no talk but of +some species of diversion, of banquets, bargains, pedigrees, +stories, news, and the like. There is no mention of +<i>God</i>, except in idle swearing and cursing; whereas the +<i>poor</i> and the <i>sick</i>, who know nothing of ease, have +God in their mouths and their hearts every minute.</p> +<p>“But go ye also in the rear of her, and keep every body +in his sleep and his rest, in prosperity and comfort, abundance +and carelessness; and then you will see the poor honest man, as +soon as he shall drink of the alluring cup of Ease, become a +perverse, proud, untractable churl—the industrious labourer +change into a careless, waggish rattler—and every other +person become just what you would desire him. Because +pleasant <i>Ease</i> is what every one seeks and loves; she hears +not counsel, fears not punishment—if good, she will not +recognise it—if bad, she will foster it of her own +accord. <i>She</i> is the prime-temptation; the man who is +proof against <i>her</i> tender charms, ye may fling your caps +to—for we must bid farewell for ever to his company. +<i>Ease</i>, then, is my terrestrial <i>deputy</i>, follow her to +Britain, and be as obedient to her as to our own royal +majesty.”</p> +<p>At this moment the huge bolt was shaken, and Lucifer and his +chief counsellors were struck to the vortex of <i>extremest +Hell</i>; and oh, how horrible it was to see the throat of +Unknown opening to receive them! “Well,” said +the angel “we will now return; but you have not yet seen +any thing in comparison with the <i>whole</i>, which is within +the bounds of <i>Destruction</i>, and if you had seen the whole, +it is nothing to the inexpressible misery which exists in +<i>Unknown</i>, for it is <!-- page 123--><a +name="page123"></a><span class="pagenum">p. 123</span>not +possible to form an idea of the World in extremest +Hell.” And at that word the celestial messenger +snatched me up to the firmament of the accursed kingdom of +Darkness, by a way I had not seen, whence I obtained, from the +palace along all the firmament of the black and hot +<i>Destruction</i>, and the whole <i>land of Forgetfulness</i>, +even to the walls of the <i>city of Destruction</i>, a full view +of the accursed monster of a <i>giantess</i>, whose feet I had +seen before—I do not possess words to describe her +figure. But I can tell you that she was a <i>triple-faced +giantess</i>, having one very atrocious countenance turned +towards the heavens, barking, snorting and vomiting accursed +abomination against the celestial king; another countenance very +fair towards the <i>earth</i>, to entice men to tarry in her +shadow; and another, the most frightful countenance of all, +turned towards <i>Hell</i>, to torment it to all eternity. +She is larger than the entire earth, and is yet daily increasing, +and a hundred times more frightful than the whole of Hell. +She caused Hell to be made, and it is she who fills it with +inhabitants. If <i>she</i> were removed from Hell, Hell +would become Paradise; and if she were removed from the earth, +the little world would become Heaven; and if she were to go to +Heaven, she would change the regions of bliss into utter +Hell. There is nothing in all the universe, (except +herself,) that God did not create. She is the mother of the +four female deceivers of the city of Destruction; she is the +mother of <i>Death</i>; she is the mother of every <i>evil</i> +and <i>misery</i>; and she has a fearful hold on every living +man—her name is SIN. “<i>He who escapes from +her hook</i>, <i>for ever blessed is he</i>!” said the +angel. Thereupon he departed, and I could hear his voice +saying, “<i>write down what thou hast seen</i>, <i>and he +who shall read it carefully shall never have reason to +repent</i>.”</p> +<h3><!-- page 124--><a name="page124"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 124</span>The Heavy Heart.</h3> +<p>Heavy’s the heart with wandering below,<br /> +And with seeing the things in the country of woe;<br /> +Seeing lost men and the fiendish race,<br /> +In their very horrible prison place;<br /> +Seeing that the end of the crooked track<br /> + Is a flaming lake,<br /> + Where dragon and snake<br /> + With rage are swelling.<br /> +I’d not, o’er a thousand worlds to reign,<br /> + Behold again,<br /> + Though safe from pain,<br /> + The infernal dwelling.</p> +<p>Heavy’s my heart, whilst so vividly<br /> +The place is yet in my memory;<br /> +To see so many, to me well known,<br /> +<!-- page 125--><a name="page125"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +125</span>Thither unwittingly sinking down.<br /> +To-day a hell-dog is yesterday’s man,<br /> + And he has no plan,<br /> + But others to trepan<br /> + To Hell’s dismal revels.<br /> +When he reach’d the pit he a fiend became,<br /> + In face and in frame,<br /> + And in mind the same<br /> + As the very devils.</p> +<p>Heavy’s the heart with viewing the bed,<br /> +Where sin has the meed it has merited;<br /> +What frightful taunts from forked tongue,<br /> +On gentle and simple there are flung.<br /> +The ghastliness of the damned things to state.<br /> + Or the pains to relate<br /> + Which will ne’er abate<br /> + But increase for ever,<br /> +No power have I, nor others I wot:<br /> + Words cannot be got;<br /> + The shapes and the spot<br /> + Can be pictured never.</p> +<p>Heavy’s the heart, as none will deny,<br /> +At losing one’s friend or the maid of one’s eye;<br +/> +At losing one’s freedom, one’s land or wealth;<br /> +At losing one’s fame, or alas! one’s health;<br /> +At losing leisure; at losing ease;<br /> + At losing peace<br /> + And all things that please<br /> + The heaven under.<br /> +<!-- page 126--><a name="page126"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +126</span>At losing memory, beauty and grace,<br /> + Heart-heaviness<br /> + For a little space<br /> + Can cause no wonder.</p> +<p>Heavy’s the heart of man when first<br /> +He awakes from his worldly dream accursed,<br /> +Fain would be freed from his awful load<br /> +Of sin, and be reconciled with his God;<br /> +When he feels for pleasures and luxuries<br /> + Disgust arise,<br /> + From the agonies<br /> + Of the ferment unruly,<br /> +Through which he becomes regenerate,<br /> + Of Christ the mate,<br /> + From his sinful state<br /> + Springing blithe and holy.</p> +<p>Heavy’s the heart of the best of mankind,<br /> +Upon the bed of death reclined;<br /> +In mind and body ill at ease,<br /> +Betwixt remorse and the disease,<br /> +Vext by sharp pangs and dreading more.<br /> + O mortal poor!<br /> + O dreadful hour!<br /> + Horrors surround him!<br /> +To the end of the vain world he has won;<br /> + And dark and dun<br /> + The eternal one<br /> + Beholds beyond him.</p> +<p><!-- page 127--><a name="page127"></a><span class="pagenum">p. +127</span>Heavy’s the heart, the pressure below,<br /> +Of all the griefs I have mentioned now;<br /> +But were they together all met in a mass,<br /> +There’s one grief still would all surpass;<br /> +Hope frees from each woe, while we this side<br /> + Of the wall abide—<br /> + At every tide<br /> + ’Tis an outlet cranny.<br /> +But there’s a grief beyond the bier;<br /> + Hope will ne’er<br /> + Its victims cheer,<br /> + That cheers so many.</p> +<p>Heavy’s the heart therewith that’s fraught;<br /> +How heavy is mine at merely the thought!<br /> +Our worldly woes, however hard,<br /> +Are trifles when with that compared:<br /> +That woe—which is known not here—that woe<br /> + The lost ones know,<br /> + And undergo<br /> + In the nether regions;<br /> +How wretched the man who exil’d to Hell,<br /> + In Hell must dwell,<br /> + And curse and yell<br /> + With the Hellish legions!</p> +<p>At nought, that may ever betide thee, fret<br /> +If at Hell thou art not arrived yet;<br /> +But thither, I rede thee, in mind repair<br /> +Full oft, and observantly wander there;<br /> +Musing intense, after reading me,<br /> + <!-- page 128--><a name="page128"></a><span +class="pagenum">p. 128</span>Of the flaming sea,<br /> + Will speedily thee<br /> + Convert by appalling.<br /> +Frequent remembrance of the black deep<br /> + Thy soul will keep,<br /> + Thou erring sheep,<br /> + From thither falling.</p> +<h2>Footnotes:</h2> +<p><a name="footnote3"></a><a href="#citation3" +class="footnote">[3]</a> Probably Cheshire; the North Welsh +commonly call Chester Caer.</p> +<p><a name="footnote23"></a><a href="#citation23" +class="footnote">[23]</a> It is the custom of Mahometans, +to lay aside their sandals, before entering the Mosque.</p> +<p><a name="footnote49"></a><a href="#citation49" +class="footnote">[49]</a> Taliesin lived in the sixth +century; he was a foundling, discovered in his infancy lying in a +coracle, on a salmon-weir, in the domain of Elphin, a prince of +North Wales, who became his patron. During his life he +arrogated to himself a supernatural descent and understanding, +and for at least a thousand years after his death he was regarded +by the descendants of the Ancient Britons, as a prophet or +something more. The poems which he produced procured for +him the title of “Bardic King;” they display much +that is vigorous and original, but are disfigured by mysticism +and extravagant metaphor. The four lines which he is made +to quote above are from his Hanes, or History, one of the most +spirited of his pieces. When Elis Wynn represents him as +sitting by a cauldron in Hades, he alludes to a wild legend +concerning him, to the effect, that he imbibed awen or poetical +genius whilst employed in watching “the seething pot” +of the sorceress Cridwen, which legend has much in common with +one of the Irish legends about Fin Macoul, which is itself nearly +identical with one in the Edda, describing the manner in which +Sigurd Fafnisbane became possessed of supernatural wisdom.</p> +<p><a name="footnote50"></a><a href="#citation50" +class="footnote">[50]</a> A dreadful pestilence, which +ravaged Gwynedd or North Wales in 560. Amongst its victims +was the king of the country, the celebrated Maelgwn, son of +Caswallon Law Hir.</p> +<p><a name="footnote84"></a><a href="#citation84" +class="footnote">[84]</a> Llyn Tegid, or the lake of +Beauty, in the neighbourhood of Bala.</p> +<p><a name="footnote93"></a><a href="#citation93" +class="footnote">[93]</a> The reader is left to guess what +description of people these prisoners were. They were +probably violent fifth monarchy preachers.</p> +<p><a name="footnote100"></a><a href="#citation100" +class="footnote">[100]</a> An active London Magistrate, +treacherously murdered by a gang of papist conspirators in the +reign of Charles the Second.</p> +<p><a name="footnote108"></a><a href="#citation108" +class="footnote">[108]</a> A celebrated Welsh poet, who +flourished in the thirteenth century. A short account of +him will be found in Owen’s Cambrian Biography.</p> +<p>***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SLEEPING BARD***</p> +<pre> + + +***** This file should be named 20634-h.htm or 20634-h.zip****** + + +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: +http://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/2/0/6/3/20634 + + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, +set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to +copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to +protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. 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You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + + + + +Title: The Sleeping Bard + or, Visions of the World, Death, and Hell + + +Author: Ellis Wynne + + + +Release Date: February 20, 2007 [eBook #20634] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII) + + +***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SLEEPING BARD*** + + + + + +Transcribed from the 1860 John Murray edition by David Price, email +ccx074@pglaf.org. Many thanks to Birmingham Library, England, for the +generous provision of the material from which this transcription was +made. http://www.birmingham.gov.uk/libraries.bcc. + + + + + +THE SLEEPING BARD; +OR +Visions of the World, Death, and Hell, +BY +ELIS WYN. + + +TRANSLATED FROM THE CAMBRIAN BRITISH +BY +GEORGE BORROW, + +AUTHOR OF +"THE BIBLE IN SPAIN," "THE GYPSIES OF SPAIN," ETC. + +LONDON: +JOHN MURRAY, ALBEMARLE STREET. +1860. + + + + +Preface. + + +The Sleeping Bard was originally written in the Welsh language, and was +published about the year 1720. The author of it, Elis Wyn, was a +clergyman of the Cambro Anglican Church, and a native of Denbighshire, in +which county he passed the greater part of his life, at a place called Y +las Ynys. Besides the Sleeping Bard, he wrote and published a book in +Welsh, consisting of advice to Christian Professors. The above scanty +details comprise all that is known of Elis Wyn. Both his works have +enjoyed, and still enjoy, considerable popularity in Wales. + +The Sleeping Bard, though a highly remarkable, is not exactly entitled to +the appellation of an original work. There are in the Spanish language +certain pieces by Francisco Quevedo, called "Visions or Discourses;" the +principal ones being "The Vision of the Carcases, the Sties of Pluto, and +the Inside of the World Disclosed; The Visit of the Gayeties, and the +Intermeddler, the Duenna and the Informer." With all these the Visions +of Elis Wyn have more or less connection. The idea of the Vision of the +World, was clearly taken from the Interior of the World Disclosed; the +idea of the Vision of Death, from the Vision of the Carcases; that of the +Vision of Hell, from the Sties of Pluto; whilst many characters and +scenes in the three parts, into which the work of Elis Wyn is divided, +are taken either from the Visit of the Gayeties, the Intermeddler, or +others of Quevedo's Visions; for example Rhywun, or Somebody, who in the +Vision of Death makes the humorous complaint, that so much of the +villainy and scandal of the world is attributed to him, is neither more +nor less than Quevedo's Juan de la Encina, or Jack o' the Oak, who in the +Visit of the Gayeties, is made to speak somewhat after the following +fashion:-- + + "O ye living people, spawn of Satan that ye are! what is the reason + that ye cannot let me be at rest now that I am dead, and all is over + with me? What have I done to you? What have I done to cause you to + defame me in every thing, who have a hand in nothing, and to blame me + for that of which I am entirely ignorant?" "Who are you?" said I with + a timorous bow, "for I really do not understand you." "I am," said + he, "the unfortunate Juan de la Encina, whom, notwithstanding I have + been here many years, ye mix up with all the follies which ye do and + say during your lives; for all your lives long, whenever you hear of + an absurdity, or commit one, you are in the habit of saying, 'Juan de + la Encina could not have acted more like a fool;' or, 'that is one of + the follies of Juan de la Encina.' I would have you know that all you + men, when you say or do foolish things, are Juan de la Encina; for + this appellation of Encina, seems wide enough to cover all the + absurdities of the world." + +Nevertheless, though there is a considerable amount of what is Quevedo's +in the Visions of Elis Wyn, there is a vast deal in them which strictly +belongs to the Welshman. Upon the whole, the Cambrian work is superior +to the Spanish. There is more unity of purpose in it, and it is far less +encumbered with useless matter. In reading Quevedo's Visions, it is +frequently difficult to guess what the writer is aiming at; not so whilst +perusing those of Elis Wyn. It is always clear enough, that the Welshman +is either lashing the follies or vices of the world, showing the +certainty of death, or endeavouring to keep people from Hell, by +conveying to them an idea of the torments to which the guilty are +subjected in a future state. + +Whether Elis Wyn had ever read the Visions of Quevedo in their original +language, it is impossible to say; the probability however is, that he +was acquainted with them through the medium of an English translation, +which was published in London about the beginning of the eighteenth +century; of the merits of that translation the present writer can say +nothing, as it has never come to his hand: he cannot however help +observing, that a person who would translate the Visions of Quevedo, and +certain other writings of his, should be something more than a fair +Spanish scholar, and a good master of the language into which he would +render them, as they abound not only with idiomatic phrases, but terms of +cant or Germania, which are as unintelligible as Greek or Arabic to the +greater part of the Spaniards themselves. + +The following translation of the Sleeping Bard has long existed in +manuscript. It was made by the writer of these lines in the year 1830, +at the request of a little Welsh bookseller of his acquaintance, who +resided in the rather unfashionable neighbourhood of Smithfield, and who +entertained an opinion that a translation of the work of Elis Wyn, would +enjoy a great sale both in England and Wales. On the eve of committing +it to the press however, the Cambrian Briton felt his small heart give +way within him: "Were I to print it," said he, "I should be ruined; the +terrible descriptions of vice and torment, would frighten the genteel +part of the English public out of its wits, and I should to a certainty +be prosecuted by Sir James Scarlett. I am much obliged to you, for the +trouble you have given yourself on my account--but Myn Diawl! I had no +idea till I had read him in English, that Elis Wyn had been such a +terrible fellow." + +Yet there is no harm in the book. It is true that the Author is any +thing but mincing in his expressions and descriptions, but there is +nothing in the Sleeping Bard which can give offence to any but the over +fastidious. There is a great deal of squeamish nonsense in the world; +let us hope however that there is not so much as there was. Indeed can +we doubt that such folly is on the decline, when we find Albemarle Street +in '60, willing to publish a harmless but plain speaking book which +Smithfield shrank from in '30? + + + + +The Vision of the Course of the World. + + +One fine evening of warm sunny summer, I took a stroll to the top of one +of the mountains of Wales, carrying with me a telescope to assist my +feeble sight by bringing distant objects near, and magnifying small ones. +Through the thin, clear air, and the calm and luminous heat, I saw many +delightful prospects afar across the Irish sea. At length, after +feasting my eyes on all the pleasant objects around me, until the sun had +reached his goal in the west, I lay down upon the green grass, +reflecting, how fair and enchanting, from my own country, the countries +appeared whose plains my eyes had glanced over, how delightful it would +be to obtain a full view of them, and how happy those were who saw the +course of the world in comparison with me: weariness was the result of +all this toiling with my eyes and my imagination, and in the shadow of +Weariness, _Mr. Sleep_ came stealthily to enthrall me, who with his keys +of lead, locked the windows of my eyes, and all my other senses securely. +But it was in vain for him to endeavour to lock up the soul, which can +live and toil independently of the body, for my spirit escaped out of the +locked body upon the wings of Fancy, and the first thing which I saw by +the side of me was a dancing ring, and a kind of rabble in green +petticoats and red caps dancing away with the most furious eagerness. I +stood for a time in perplexity whether I should go to them or not, +because in my flurry I feared they were a gang of hungry gipsies, and +that they would do nothing less than slaughter me for their supper, and +swallow me without salt: but after gazing upon them for some time, I +could see that they were better and handsomer than the swarthy, lying +Egyptian race. So I ventured to approach them, but very softly, like a +hen treading upon hot embers, that I might learn who they were; and at +length I took the liberty of addressing them in this guise, with my head +and back lowered horizontally: "Fair assembly, as I perceive that you are +gentry from distant parts, will you deign to take a Bard along with you, +who is desirous of travelling?" At these words the hurly-burly was +hushed, and all fixed their eyes upon me: "_Bard_," squeaked +one--"_travel_," said another--"_along with us_," said the third. By +this time I saw some looking particularly fierce upon me; then they began +to whisper in each others ears certain secret words, and to look at me; +at length the whispering ceased, and each laying his gripe upon me they +raised me upon their shoulders, as we do a knight of the shire, and then +away with me they flew like the wind, over houses and fields, cities and +kingdoms, seas and mountains; and so quickly did they fly that I could +fasten my sight upon nothing, and what was worse, I began to suspect that +my companions, by their frowning and knitting their brows at me, wanted +me to sing blasphemy against my King and Maker. + +"Well," said I to myself, "I may now bid farewell to life, these cursed +witches will convey me to the pantry or cellar of some nobleman, and +there leave me, to pay with my neck for their robberies; or they will +abandon me stark naked, to freeze to death upon the sea-brink of old +Shire Caer, {3} or some other cold, distant place;" but on reflecting +that all the old hags whom I had once known had long been dead and +buried, and perceiving that these people took pleasure in holding or +waving me over hollow ravines, I conjectured that they were not witches +but beings who are called fairies. We made no stop until I found myself +by the side of a huge castle, the most beautiful I had ever seen, with a +large pool or moat surrounding it: then they began to consult what they +should do with me; "shall we go direct to the castle with him?" said one. +"No, let us hang him or cast him into the lake, he is not worth being +shown to our great prince," said another. "Did he say his prayers before +he went to sleep?" said a third. At the mention of prayers, I uttered a +confused groan to heaven for pardon and assistance; and as soon as I +recollected myself, I saw a light at a vast distance bursting forth, Oh, +how glorious! As it drew nigh, my companions were darkening and +vanishing, and quickly there came floating towards us a form of light +over the castle, whereupon the fairies abandoned their hold of me, but as +they departed they turned upon me a hellish scowl, and unless the angel +had supported me, I should have been dashed into pieces small enough for +a pasty, by the time I reached the ground. + +"What is your business here?" said the angel. "In verity my lord," I +replied, "I do not know what place _here_ is, nor what is my business, +nor what I am myself, nor what has become of my other part; I had four +limbs and a head, and whether I have left them at home, or whether the +fairies, who have certainly not acted fairly with me, have cast me into +some abyss, (for I remember to have passed over several horrid ravines,) +I cannot tell, sir, though you should cause me to be hung." "Fairly +indeed," said he, "they would have acted with you, if I had not come just +in time to save you from the clutches of these children of hell." + +"Since you have such a particular desire to see the course of the _little +world_," said he, "I have received commands to give you a sight of it, in +order that you may see your error in being discontented with your +station, and your own country. Come with me," he added, "for a +peregrination," and at the word he snatched me up, just as the dawn was +beginning to break, far above the topmost tower of the castle; we rested +in the firmament upon the ledge of a light cloud to gaze upon the rising +sun; but my heavenly companion, was far more luminous than the sun, but +all his splendour was upward, by reason of a veil which was betwixt him +and the nether regions. When the light of the sun became stronger, I +could see, between the two luminaries, the vast air-encircled world, like +a little round bullet, very far beneath us. "Look now," said the angel, +giving me a different telescope from that which I had on the mountain. +When I peeped through this I saw things in a manner altogether different +from that in which I had seen them before, and in a much clearer one. I +saw a city of monstrous size, and thousands of cities and kingdoms within +it; and the great ocean, like a moat, around it, and other seas, like +rivers, intersecting it. + +By dint of long gazing I could see that it was divided into three +exceedingly large streets; each street with a large, magnificent gate at +the bottom, and each gate with a fair tower over it. Upon each tower +there was a damsel of wonderful beauty, standing in the sight of the +whole street; and the three towers appeared to reach up behind the walls +to the skirts of the castle afore-mentioned. Crossing these three huge +streets I could see another; it was but little and mean in comparison +with them, but it was clean and neat, and on a higher foundation than the +other streets, proceeding upward towards the east, whilst the three +others ran downward towards the north to the great gates. I now ventured +to enquire of my companion whether I might be permitted to speak. +"Certainly," said the angel, "speak out! but listen attentively to my +answers, so that I may not have to say the same thing to you more than +once." "I will, my lord," said I. "Now pray, what place is the castle +yonder in the north?" "The castle above in the air," said he, "belongs +to Belial, prince of the power of the air, and governor of all the great +city below: it is called Delusive Castle, for Belial is a great deluder, +and by his wiles he keeps under his banner all you see, with the +exception of the little street yonder. He is a great prince, with +thousands of princes under him--what were Caesar or Alexander the Great +compared with him? What are the Turk and old Lewis of France, but his +servants? Great, yea, exceeding great, are the power, subtlety, and +diligence of the prince Belial; and his armies in the country below are +innumerable." "For what purpose," said I, "are the damsels standing +yonder, and who are they?" "Softly," said the angel, "one question at +once: they are there to be loved and to be adored." "And no wonder +indeed," said I, "since they are so amiable; if I possessed feet and +hands as formerly, I would go and offer love and adoration to them +myself." "Hush, hush," said he, "if you would do so with your members, +it is well that you are without them; know, thou foolish spirit, that +these three princesses are only three destructive deluders, daughters of +the prince Belial, and all their beauty and affability, which are +irradiating the streets, are only masks over deformity and cruelty; the +three within are like their father, replete with deadly poison." "Woe's +me; is it possible," said I, quite sad, and smitten with love of them! +"It is but too true, alas," said he. "Thou admirest the radiance with +which they shine upon their adorers; but know that there is in that +radiance a very wondrous charm; it blinds men from looking back, it +deafens them lest they should hear their danger, and it burns them with +ceaseless longing for more of it; which longing, is itself a deadly +poison, breeding, within those who feel it, diseases not to be got rid +of, which no physician can cure, not even death, nor anything, unless the +heavenly medicine, which is called repentance, is procured, to cast out +the evil in time, before it is imbibed too far, by excessive looking upon +them." "But how is it," said I, "that Belial does not wish to have these +adorers himself?" "He has them," said the angel; "the old fox is adored +in his daughters, because, whilst a man sticks to these, or to one of the +three, he is securely under the mark of Belial, and wears his livery." + +"What are the names," said I, "of those three deceivers?" "The farthest, +yonder," said he, "is called _Pride_, the eldest daughter of Belial; the +second is _Pleasure_; and _Lucre_ is the next to us: these three are the +trinity which the world adores." "Pray, has this great, distracted +city," said I, "any better name than _Bedlam the Great_?" "It has," he +replied, "it is called _The City of Perdition_." "Woe is me," said I, +"are all that are contained therein people of perdition?" "The whole," +said he, "except some who may escape out to the most high city above, +ruled by the king Emmanuel." "Woe's me and mine," said I, "how shall +they escape, ever gazing, as they are, upon the thing which blinds them +more and more, and which plunders them in their blindness?" "It would be +quite impossible," said he, "for one man to escape from thence, did not +Emmanuel send his messengers, early and late, from above, to persuade +them to turn to him, their lawful King, from the service of the rebel, +and also transmit to some, the present of a precious ointment, called +_faith_, to anoint their eyes with; and whosoever obtains this _true_ +ointment, (for there is a counterfeit of it, as there is of every thing +else, in the city of Perdition,) and anoints himself with it, will see +his wounds, and his madness, and will not tarry a minute longer here, +though Belial should give him his three daughters, yea, or the fourth, +which is the greatest of all, to do so." + +"What are those great streets called?" said I. "Each is called," he +replied, "by the name of the princess who governs it: the first is the +street of _Pride_, the middle one the street of _Pleasure_, and the +nearest, the street of _Lucre_." "Pray tell me," said I, "who are +dwelling in these streets? What is the language which they speak? What +are the tenets which they hold; and to what nation do they belong?" +"Many," said he, "of every language, faith, and nation under the Sun, are +living in each of those vast streets below; and there are many living in +each of the three streets alternately, and every one as near as possible +to the gate; and they frequently remove, unable to tarry long in the one, +from the great love they bear to the princess of some other street; and +the old fox looks slyly on, permitting every one to love his choice, or +all three if he pleases, for then he is most sure of him." + +"Come nearer to them," said the angel, and hurried with me downwards, +shrouded in his impenetrable veil, through much noxious vapour which was +rising from the city; presently we descended in the street of Pride, upon +a spacious mansion open at the top, whose windows had been dashed out by +dogs and crows, and whose owners had departed to England or France, to +seek there for what they could have obtained much easier at home; thus, +instead of the good, old, charitable, domestic family of yore, there were +none at present but owls, crows, or chequered magpies, whose hooting, +cawing and chattering were excellent comments on the practices of the +present owners. There were in that street, myriads of such abandoned +palaces, which might have been, had it not been for Pride, the resorts of +the best, as of yore, places of refuge for the weak, schools of peace and +of every kind of goodness; and blessings to thousands of small houses +around. + +From the summit of this ruin, we had scope and leisure enough to observe +the whole street on either side. There were fair houses of wondrous +height and magnificence--and no wonder, as there were emperors, kings, +and hundreds of princes there, and thousands of nobles and gentry, and +very many women of every degree. I saw a vain high-topt creature, like a +ship at full sail, walking as if in a frame, carrying about her full the +amount of a pedlar's pack, and having at her ears, the worth of a good +farm, in pearls; and there were not a few of her kind--some were singing, +in order that their voices might be praised; some were dancing, to show +their figures; others were painting to improve their complexions; others +had been trimming themselves before the glass, for three hours, learning +to smile, moving pins and making gestures and putting themselves in +attitudes. There was many a vain creature there, who did not know how to +open her lips to speak, or to eat, nor, from sheer pride, to look under +her feet; and many a ragged shrew, who would insist that she was as good +a gentlewoman as the best in the street; and many an ambling fop, who +could winnow beans with the mere wind of his train. + +Whilst I was looking, from afar upon these, and a hundred such, behold! +there passed by towards us, a bouncing, variegated lady with a lofty +look, and with a hundred folks gazing after her; some bent themselves as +if to adore her; some few thrust something into her hand. Being unable +to imagine who she was, I enquired. "Oh," replied my friend, "she is one +who has all her portion in sight, yet you see how many foolish people are +seeking her, and the meanest of them in possession of all the attainments +she can boast of. _She will not have what she can gain_, _and will never +gain what she desires_, and she will speak to no one but her betters, on +account of her mother's telling her, 'that a young woman cannot do a +worse thing, than be humble in her love.'" Thereupon came out from +beneath us a pillar of a man, who had been an alderman, and in many +official situations; he came spreading his wings as if to fly, though he +could scarcely draw one knee after the other, on account of the gout, and +various other genteel disorders: notwithstanding which, you could not +obtain from him, but through a very great favour, a glance or a nod, +though you should call him by his titles and his offices. + +From this being I turned my eyes to the other side of the street, where I +beheld a lusty young nobleman, with a number of people behind him; he had +a sweet smile and a condescending air to every one who met him. "It is +strange," said I, "that this young man and yonder personage should belong +to the same street." "Oh, the same princess Pride rules them both," +answered the angel,--"this young man is only speaking fair on account of +the errand he comes upon; he is seeking popularity at present, with the +intent to raise himself thereby to the highest office in the kingdom--it +is easy for him to lament to the people how much they are wronged by the +oppression of bad masters; but his own exaltment, and not the weal of the +kingdom, is the heart of the matter." After gazing for a long time, I +perceived at the gate of Pride, a fair city upon seven hills, and on the +top of its lofty palace there was a triple crown, with swords and keys +crossed. "Lo! there is Rome," said I, "and therein dwells the Pope." +"Yes, most usually," said the angel; "but he has a palace in each of the +other streets." Over against Rome, I could see a city with an +exceedingly fair palace, and upon it was mounted on high, a half-moon on +a banner of gold, and by that I knew that the Turk was there. Next to +the gate after those, was the palace of Lewis XIV., of France, as I +understood by his arms, three fleurs-de-lis upon a silver banner hanging +aloft. Whilst looking on the height and majesty of these palaces, I +perceived that there was much passing and repassing from the one to the +other, and I asked what was the cause thereof? "Oh, there is many a dark +cause," said the angel, "why those three crafty, powerful heads should +communicate; but though they account themselves fully adapted to espouse +the three princesses above, their power and subtlety are nothing when +compared with these; yes, Belial the Great does not esteem the whole +city, (though so numerous be its kings), as equivalent to his daughters. +Notwithstanding that he offers them in marriage to everybody, he has +still never given one entirely to anybody yet. There has been a rivalry +between these three concerning them:--the Turk, who calls himself _God +upon earth_, wished for the eldest, Pride, in marriage. 'No,' said the +king of France, 'she belongs to me, as I keep all my subjects in her +street, and likewise bring many to her from England and other countries.' +Spain would have the princess Lucre, in despite of Holland and all the +Jews. England would have the princess Pleasure, in despite of the +Pagans. But the Pope would have the whole three, and with better reason +than all the rest together, therefore Belial has stationed him next to +them in the three streets." "And is it on this account that there is +this intercourse at present," said I. "No;" he replied, "Belial has +arranged the matter between them for some time; but at present he has +caused them to lay their heads together, how they may best destroy the +cross street yonder, which is the city of Emmanuel, and particularly one +great palace which is there, out of sheer venom at perceiving that it is +a fairer edifice than exists in all the city of Perdition. Belial +moreover has promised to those who shall accomplish its destruction, the +half of his kingdom during his life, and the whole when he is dead. But, +notwithstanding the greatness of his power and the depth of his wiles; +notwithstanding the multitude of crafty emperors, kings, and rulers, who +are beneath his banner in the vast city of Perdition; and notwithstanding +the bravery of his countless legions on the outer side of the gates in +the world below; notwithstanding all this," said the angel, "he shall see +that it is a task above his power to perform. Yes; however great Belial +may be, he shall find that there is One greater than he, in the little +street yonder." + +I was unable to hear his angelic reasons completely, from the tumbling +there was along this slippery street every hour, and I could see some +people with ladders scaling the tower, and having reached the highest +step fall headlong to the bottom. "To what place are those fools seeking +to get?" said I. "To a place high enough," said he; "they are seeking to +break into the treasury of the princess." "I will warrant it is full +enough," said I. "It is," he replied; "and with every thing which +belongs to this street, for the purpose of being distributed amongst the +inhabitants. There you will find every species of warlike arms to subdue +and to over-run countries; every species of arms of gentility, banners, +escutcheons, books of pedigree, stanzas and poems relating to ancestry, +with every species of brave garments; admirable stories, lying portraits; +all kinds of tints and waters to embellish the countenance; all sorts of +high offices and titles; and, to be brief, there is every thing there +that is adapted to cause a man to think better of himself, and worse of +others than he ought. The chief officers of this treasury are masters of +ceremonies, vagabonds, genealogists, bards, orators, flatterers, dancers, +tailors, mantua-makers, and the like." From this great street we +proceeded to the next, where the princess Lucre reigns; it was a full and +prodigiously wealthy street, yet not half so splendid and clean as the +street of Pride, nor its people half so bold and lofty looking; for they +were skulking mean-looking fellows, for the most part. + +There were in this street thousands of Spaniards, Hollanders, Venetians, +and Jews, and a great many aged, decrepit people were also there. "Pray, +sir," said I, "what kind of men are these?" "They have all gain in +view," said he. "At the lowest extremity, on one side, you will still +see the Pope; also subduers of kingdoms and their soldiers, oppressors, +foresters, shutters up of the common foot-paths, justices and their +bribers, and the whole race of lawyers down to the catchpole. On the +other side," said he, "there are physicians, apothecaries, doctors, +misers, merchants, extortioners, usurers, refusers to pay tithes, wages, +rents, or alms which were left to schools and charity houses; purveyors +and chapmen who keep and raise the market to their own price; shopkeepers +(or sharpers) who make money out of the necessity or ignorance of the +buyer; stewards of every degree, sturdy beggars, taverners who plunder +the families of careless men of their property, and the country of its +barley for the bread of the poor. All these are thieves of the first +water," said he; "and the rest are petty thieves, for the most part, and +keep at the upper end of the street; they consist of highway robbers, +tailors, weavers, millers, measurers of wet and dry, and the like." In +the midst of this discourse, I heard a prodigious tumult at the lower end +of the street, where there was a huge crowd of people thronging towards +the gate, with such pushing and disputing as caused me to imagine that +there was a general fray on foot, until I demanded of my friend what was +the matter. "There is an exceeding great treasure in that tower," said +the angel, "and all that concourse is for the purpose of choosing a +treasurer to the princess, in lieu of the Pope, who has been turned out +of that office." So we went to see the election. + +The men who were competing for the office were the _Stewards_, the +_Usurers_, the _Lawyers_, and the _Merchants_, and the richest of the +whole was to obtain it, because the more you have the more you shall +crave, is the epidemic curse of the street. The Stewards were rejected +at the first offer, lest they should impoverish the whole street, and, as +they had raised their palaces on the ruins of their masters, lest they +should in the end turn the princess out of her possession; then the +dispute arose between the three others; the Merchants had the most silks, +the Lawyers most mortgages on lands, and the Usurers the greatest number +of full bags, and bills and bonds. "Ha! they will not agree to night," +said the angel, "so come away; the Lawyers are richer than the Merchants, +the Usurers are richer than the Lawyers, and the Stewards than the +Usurers, and Belial than the whole, for he owns them all, and their +property too." + +"For what reason is the princess keeping these thieves about her?" I +demanded. "What can be more proper," said he, "when she herself is the +arrantest of thieves." I was astonished to hear him call the princess +thus, and the greatest potentates thieves of the first water. "Pray, my +lord," said I, "how can you call those illustrious people greater thieves +than robbers on the highway?" "You are but a dupe," said he; "is not the +villain who goes over the world with his sword in his hand and his +plunderers behind him, burning and slaying, wresting kingdoms from their +right owners, and looking forward to be adored as a conqueror, worse than +the rogue who takes a purse upon the highway? What is the tailor who +cabbages a piece of cloth, to the great man who takes a piece out of the +parish common? Ought not the latter to be called a thief of the first +water, or ten times more a rogue than the other?--the tailor merely takes +snips of cloth from his customer, whilst the other takes from the poor +man the sustenance of his beast, and by so doing the sustenance of +himself and his little ones--what is taking a handful of flour at the +mill, to keeping a hundred sacksfull to putrify, in order to obtain +afterwards a four-fold price?--what is the half-naked soldier who takes +your garment away with his sword, to the lawyer, who takes your whole +estate from you with a goose's quill, without any claim or bond upon +it?--and what is the pickpocket who takes five pounds, to the cogger of +dice who will cheat you of a hundred in the third part of a night?--and +what is the jockey who tricks you in some old unsound horse, to the +apothecary who chouses you of your money, and your life also with some +old unwholesome physic?--and yet what are all these thieves to the +mistress-thief there, who takes away from the whole all these things, and +their hearts and their souls at the end of the fair?" From this dirty, +disorderly street we proceeded to the street of the princess Pleasure, in +which I beheld a number of Britons, French, Italians, Pagans, &c. She +was a princess exceedingly beautiful to the eye, with a cup of drugged +wine in the one hand, and a crown and a harp in the other. In her +treasury there were numberless pleasures and pretty things to obtain the +custom of every body, and to keep them in the service of her father. Yea! +there were many who escaped to this charming street, to cast off the +melancholy arising from their losses and debts in the other streets. It +was a street prodigiously crowded, especially with young people; and the +princess was careful to please every body, and to keep an arrow adapted +to every mark. If you are thirsty, you can have here your choice of +drink; if you love dancing and singing, you can get here your fill. If +her comeliness entice you to lust for the body of a female, she has only +to lift up her finger to one of the officers of her father, (who surround +her at all times, though invisibly), and they will fetch you a lass in a +minute, or the _body_ of a harlot newly buried, and will go into her in +lieu of a _soul_, rather than you should abandon so good a design. + +Here there are handsome houses with very pleasant gardens, teeming +orchards, and shadowy groves, adapted to all kinds of secret meetings, in +which one can hunt birds and a certain fair coney; here there are +delightful rivers for fishing, and wide fields hedged around, in which it +is pleasant to hunt the hare and fox. All along the street you could see +farces being acted, juggling going on, and all kinds of tricks of +legerdemain; there was plenty of licentious music, vocal and +instrumental, ballad singing, and every species of merriment; there was +no lack of male and female beauty, singing and dancing; and there were +here many from the street of Pride, who came to receive praise and +adoration. In the interior of the houses I could see people on beds of +silk and down, wallowing in voluptuousness; some were engaged at billiard- +playing, and were occasionally swearing or cursing the table keeper; +others were rattling the dice or shuffling the cards. My guide pointed +out to me some from the street of Lucre, who had chambers in this street; +they had run hither to reckon their money, but they did not tarry long +lest some of the innumerable tempting things to be met with here should +induce them to part with their pelf, without usury. I could see throngs +of individuals feasting, with something of every creature before them; +oh, how every one did gorge, swallowing mess after mess of dainties, +sufficient to have feasted a moderate man for three weeks, and when they +could eat no more, they belched out a thanks for what they had received, +and then gave the health of the king and every jolly companion; after +which, they drowned the savour of the food, and their cares besides, in +an ocean of wine; then they called for tobacco, and began telling stories +of their neighbours--and, I observed, that all the stories were well +received, whether true or false, provided they were amusing and of late +date, above all if they contained plenty of scandal: there they sat, each +with his clay pistol puffing forth fire and smoke, and slander to his +neighbour. At length I was fain to request my guide to permit me to move +on; the floor was impure with saliva and spilt drink, and I was +apprehensive that certain heavy hiccups which I heard, might be merely +the prelude to something more disagreeable. + +From thence we went to a place where we heard a terrible noise, a medley +of striking, jabbering, crying and laughing, shouting and singing. +"Here's Bedlam, doubtless," said I. By the time we entered the den the +brawling had ceased. Of the company, one was on the ground insensible; +another was in a yet more deplorable condition; another was nodding over +a hearthful of battered pots, pieces of pipes, and oozings of ale. And +what was all this, upon enquiry, but a carousal of seven thirsty +neighbours--a goldsmith, a pilot, a smith, a miner, a chimney-sweeper, a +poet, and a parson who had come to preach sobriety, and to exhibit in +himself what a disgusting thing drunkenness is. The origin of the last +squabble was a dispute which had arisen among them, about which of the +seven loved a pipe and flagon best. The poet had carried the day over +all the rest, with the exception of the parson, who, out of respect for +his cloth, had the most votes, being placed at the head of the jolly +companions--the poet singing:-- + + "Oh, where are there seven beneath the sky, + Who with these seven for thirst can vie? + But the best for good ale, these seven among, + Are the jolly divine, and the son of song." + +Disgusted with these drunken swine, we went nearer to the gate, to take a +peep at the follies of the palace of _Love_, the purblind king; it is a +place easy to enter and difficult to escape from, and in it there is a +prodigious number of chambers. In the hall opposite to the door was +insane Cupid, with his two arrows upon his bow, shooting tormenting +poison, which is called _bliss_. Upon the floor I could see many fair +damsels, finely dressed, walking about, and behind them a parcel of +miserable youths gazing upon their beauty, and each eager to obtain a +glance from his mistress, fearing her frown far worse than death. One +was bending to the ground and placing a letter in the hands of his +goddess; another a piece of music, all in fearful expectation, like +school-boys showing their tasks to their master; and the damsels would +glance back upon them a smile, to keep up the fervour of their adorers, +but nothing more, lest they should lose their desire, become cured of +their wound and depart. On going forward to the parlour, I beheld +females learning to dance and to sing, and to play on instruments, for +the purpose of making their lovers seven times more foolish than they +were already: on going to the buttery, I found them taking lessons in +delicacy and propriety of eating: on going to the cellar, I saw them +making up potent love drinks, from nail-parings and the like: on going to +the chambers, we beheld a fellow in a secret apartment, putting himself +into all kinds of attitudes, to teach his beloved elegant manners; +another learning in a glass to laugh in a becoming manner, without +showing to his love too much of his teeth; another we found embellishing +his tale before going to her, and repeating the same lesson a hundred +times. Tired of this insiped folly, I went to another chamber, where +there was a nobleman, who had sent for a bard from the street of Pride, +to compose a eulogistic strain on his angel, and a laudatory ode on +himself; the bard was haranguing upon his talent--"I can," said he, +"compare her to all the red and white under the sun, and say that her +hair is a hundredfold more yellow than gold; and as for your ode, I can +carry your genealogy through the bowels of an infinity of knights and +princes, and through the waters of the deluge, even as high up as Adam." +"Lo!" said I, "here is a bard who is a better inventor than myself." +"Come away, come away," said the angel, "these people are thinking to +bamboozle the woman, but when they go to her, they will be sure to obtain +from her as good as they bring." + +On leaving these people, we caught a glimpse of some cells, where more +obscene practices were going on than modesty will suffer me to mention, +which caused my companion to snatch me away in wrath, from this palace of +whimsicality and wantonness, to the treasury of the princess, (because we +went where we pleased, in spite of doors and locks.) There we beheld a +multitude of beautiful damsels, all sorts of drink, fruit, and dainties; +all kinds of instruments and books of music, harps, pipes, poems, carols, +&c.; all kinds of games of chance, draught-boards, dice-boxes, dice, +cards, &c.; all kinds of models of banquets and mansions, figures of men, +contrivances and amusements; all kinds of waters, perfumes, colors and +salves to make the ugly handsome, and the old look young, and to make the +harlot and her putrid bones sweet for a time. + +To be brief, there were here all kinds of _shadows_ of pleasure, all +kinds of _seeming_ delight; and to tell the truth, I believe this place +would have ensnared me, had not my friend, without ceremony, snatched me +far away from the three deceitful towers, to the upper end of the street, +and set me down by a castellated palace of prodigious size, and very +agreeable at first sight, but vile and terribly revolting on the farthest +side, though it was only seen with great difficulty on the side of its +deformity; it had a multitude of doors, and all the doors were splendid +on the outside, but filthy within. "Pray, my lord," said I, "if it +please you, what is this wonderful place?" "This," said he, "is the +palace of another daughter of Belial, who is called _Hypocrisy_; she here +keeps her school; there is not a youth or damsel within the whole city, +that has not been her scholar, and the people in general, have so well +imbibed what she has taught, that her lessons have become a second +nature, and intertwined with all their thoughts, words and actions, +almost since the time of their childhood." After I had inspected for a +time the falsehood of every corner of the edifice, a procession passed by +with a deal of weeping and groaning, and many men and horses dight in +habits of deep mourning. Presently came a wretched widow, closely +muffled, in order that she might look no more on this vile world; she was +feebly crying, and groaning slowly in the intervals of fainting +fits--verily, I could not help weeping myself, out of pity. "Pooh, +pooh," said the angel, "keep your tears for something more worthy; these +faintings are only a lesson of Hypocrisy, and in her great school these +black garments were fashioned. There is not one of these people weeping +seriously; the widow, before the body left the house, had wedded another +man, in her heart; and if she could get rid of the expense attending the +body, she would not care a rush if the soul of her husband were at the +bottom of hell; nor would her relations, more than herself; because when +his disease was hardest upon him, instead of giving him salutary counsel +and praying fervently, for the Lord to have mercy upon him, they only +talked to him about his effects, and about his testament, or his +pedigree, or what a handsome vigorous man he had been, and the like; so +all this lamenting is mere sham--some are mourning in obedience to custom +and habit, others for company's sake, and others for hire." + +Scarcely had this procession passed by, when, lo, another crowd came in +sight. A certain nobleman, prodigiously magnificient, and his lady at +his side, were going along in state; many respectable men were capping +them, and there were a thousand also behind them, shewing them every kind +of submission and reverence, and by the _favours_, I perceived that it +was a wedding: "He must be a very exalted nobleman," said I, "who merits +so much respect from all these people." "If you should consider the +whole, you would say something quite different," said my guide; "that +nobleman is one from the street of Pleasure; and the female, is a damsel +from the street of Pride, and the old man yonder, who is speaking with +him, is one from the street of Lucre, who has lent money upon nearly all +the land of the nobleman, and is to-day come to settle accounts." We +drew nigh to hear the conversation. + +"Verily, sir," says the usurer, "I would not for all I possess, that you +should want any thing that I can offer, in order that you may appear to- +day like yourself, especially since you have met with a lady so amiable +and illustrious as this." (The subtle old dog knowing perfectly well +what she was all the time.) "By the Lord above," said the nobleman, "the +next greatest pleasure, to looking at her beauty, is to listen to your +obliging discourse; I would rather pay you usury than obtain money gratis +from any one else." "Of a surety, my lord," said one of his principal +associates, who was called flatterer, "my uncle shows you no respect but +what is fully your right; but with your permission, I will assert, that +he has not bestowed half the commendation on her ladyship which she +deserves. I cannot myself produce, and I will defy any man to produce +one lovelier than herself, in the whole street of Pride; nor one more +gallant than you, my lord, in the whole street of Pleasure; nor one more +courteous than you, dear uncle, in the whole street of Lucre." "Oh, that +is only your good opinion," replied the lord, "but I certainly believe +that two never came together with more mutual love than we." As they +proceeded, the crowd increased, and every one had a fair smile and a low +bow for the other, and forward they ran to meet each other with their +noses to the ground, like two cocks going to engage. "Know now," said +the angel, "that you have not yet seen a _bow_ here, nor heard a _word_, +that did not belong to the lessons of Hypocrisy. There is not here one, +after all this courtesy, that has a farthing's worth of love for the +other; indeed they are for the most part enemies to one another. The +nobleman here is only a butt amongst them, and every one has his hit at +him. The lady has her mind fixed upon his _grandeur_ and his _nobility_, +whereby she hopes to obtain precedence over many of her acquaintances. +The miser has his eye upon his _land_, for his own son; and the others, +to a man, on the money, which he is to receive as her portion, because +they are all his subjects, that is, his merchants, his tailors, his +shoemakers, or his other tradesmen, who have arrayed him and maintained +him in all this great splendour, without yet obtaining one farthing, nor +any thing but fair words, and now and then, threats perhaps. Now observe +how many masks, how many twists, Hypocrisy has given to the face of the +truth? He is promising grandeur to his love, having already disposed of +his land; and she is promising portion and purity, whereas she has no +purity, but purity of dress, and as for her portion it will not be long +in existence, there being an inveterate cancer in it, even as there is in +her own body." + +"Well, here is a proof," said I, "that one never ought to judge by +appearances." "Yes," said he, "but come away, and I will show you +something more." Whereupon he transported me up to where stood the +churches of the city of Perdition, for every body in it had an appearance +of faith, even in the age of Disbelief. First we went to the temple of +Heathenism, where I could see some adoring the form of a man, others that +of the sun, others that of the moon, and an innumerable quantity of +similar other gods, even down to leek and garlick, and a great goddess +termed _Delusion_, obtaining general adoration, although you might see +something of the remnants of the Christian faith amongst some of these +people. Thence we went to a meeting of Dummies, where there was nothing +but groaning, and shivering, and beating the breast. "Though there is +here," said the angel, "an appearance of repentance and great submission, +there is nothing in reality, but opinionativeness and obstinacy, and +pride, and thick, thick darkness. Notwithstanding they talk so much +about their _internal light_, they have not even the spectacle-glasses of +nature which the heathens have, whom you lately saw." From these dumb +dogs we chanced to turn to a large church open at the top, with a +prodigious number of sandals {23} at the gate, by which I knew that it +was the temple of the Turks; these people had only a dim and motley +colored spectacle glass, which they called the Koran, yet through this +they were always gazing up to the top of the church for their prophet, +who, according to the promise which he gave them, ought to have returned +to them long ago, but has not yet made his appearance. From there we +went to the church of the Jews, people who had failed to find the way of +escape from the city of Perdition, although they possessed a pure, clear +spectacle glass, on account of a film having come over their eyes from +long gazing, for want of having anointed them with the precious ointment, +_faith_. We next went to that of the Papists. "Behold," said the angel, +"the church which _deceiveth the nations_! Hypocrisy has built this +church at her own expense; for the Papists permit, yea enjoin the +breaking of any oath made to a heretic, although it were taken upon the +sacrament." From the chancel we passed through key-holes to the upper +end of a cell which stood apart, full of burning candles at mid-day, +where we perceived a priest with his crown shaven, walking about as if he +were in expectation of visitors; presently there came a rotund figure of +a woman, and a very pretty girl behind her, and they went upon their +knees before him to confess their sins. "My spiritual father," said the +good woman, "I labour under a burden too heavy to be borne, unless you in +your mercy will lighten it; I married a member of the church of England, +and"--"What," said the shaven crown, "married a heretic! married an +enemy! there is no pardon for you, now or ever." At this word she +fainted, and he vociferated curses at her. "Oh, and what is worse," said +she when she revived. "I have killed him!" "O, ho! you have killed him, +well that is something towards obtaining reconciliation with the church; +but I assure you, that unless you had killed him, you would never have +got absolution, nor purgatory, but would have gone plump to the devil. +But where is your offering to the cloister?" said he, snarling. "Here," +she replied, and handed him a pretty big purse of money. "Well," said +he, "I will now make your peace, and your penance is to remain a widow as +long as you live, lest you should make another bad bargain." As soon as +she had departed, the damsel came forward to make her confession. "Your +pardon, my father confessor," said she, "I have borne a child and +murdered it." "Very fair, in troth," said the confessor, "and who was +the father?" "Verily," said she, "it was one of your monastery"--"Hush, +hush," said he, "no scandal against the men of the church: but where is +your atonement to the church?" "There," said she, handing him a gold +coin. "You must repent, and your penance is to watch to night by my +bedside," said he, smiling archly upon her. + +At this moment appeared four other bald-pates, hauling in a lad to the +confessor, the poor fellow looking as pleased as if he were going to the +gallows. "We have brought you a cub," said one of the four, "that you +may award him a proper punishment for revealing the secrets of the +catholic church." "What secrets?" said the confessor, looking towards a +murky cell which was nigh at hand. "But confess villain, what did you +say?" "In truth," said the wretch, "one of my acquaintances asked me, if +I had seen the _souls_ shrieking beneath the altar, _on the day of the +festival of the dead_? And I said, that I had heard the voice, but that +I had seen nothing." "Ah, sir, say the whole," said one of the others. +"But I added," said he, "that I had heard that you were only deceiving us +ignorant people, and that instead of souls shrieking, there were only sea- +crabs crackling beneath the carpet,"--"O son of the fiend! blasphemous +monster!" said the confessor; "but proceed caitiff."--"and that it was a +wire which turned the image of saint Peter," said the fellow, "and that +it was by the wire that the Holy Ghost descended from the gallery of the +cross upon the priest." "O heritage of hell!" said the confessor. "So +ho here! take him torturers, and cast him into the smoky chimney yonder +for telling tales." "Here you see," said the angel, "the church which +Hypocrisy desires should be called the Catholic Church, and the members +of which she would fain have the world consider, as the only people +destined to be saved; it must be owned, indeed, that they had the true +spectacle-glass, but they spoiled it by cutting upon the glass numerous +images; and they had true faith, but they mingled that precious ointment +with their own novel inventions, so that at present they see no more than +the heathen." Thence we went to a barn, where stood a pert, conceited +fellow preaching with great glibness, frequently repeating the same thing +three times. "This man and his hearers," said the angel, "possess the +true spectacle-glass, to see the things which pertain to their peace, but +they lack now in their old age, a very essential matter which is called +perfect love. Various are the causes which drive folks hither; some come +out of respect to their forefathers, some out of ignorance, and many for +worldly advantage. They will make you believe with their faces that they +are being strangled, but they can swallow a toad if necessary; and thus +the princess Hypocrisy does not disdain to teach some in barns." "Pray," +said I, "where now is the _Church of England_?" "O," said he, "in the +city high above, it constitutes a great part of the _Catholic Church_, +and in the city here below, there are some probationary churches +belonging to it, where the English and Welsh are under probation for a +time, in order to become qualified to have their names written in the +book of the Catholic Church, and they who become so, _blessed are they +for ever_. But alas, there are but very few who are adapting themselves +to obtain honour above; because, instead of looking thitherward, too many +suffer themselves to be blinded by the three princesses below, and +Hypocrisy keeps many with one eye upon the city above, and the other on +that below; yea, Hypocrisy has succeeded in enticing many from their +path, after they have overcome the three other deceivers. Come in here," +said he, "and you will see something more;" whereupon he carried me to +the gallery of one of the churches in Wales, the people being in the +midst of the service. And lo! some were whispering, talking and +laughing; some looking upon the pretty women; others were examining the +dress of their neighbours from top to toe; some were pushing themselves +forward and snarling at one another about rank; some were dozing; others +were busily engaged in their devotions, but many of these were playing a +hypocritical part. "You have not seen yet," said the angel, "no, not +amongst the infidels, shamelessness as open and barefaced as this: but +thus, alas, we see _that the corruption of the best thing is the +corruption worst of all_." The congregation then proceeded to take the +sacrament, and every one displayed reverential feelings at the altar. + +However, (through the glass of my companion,) I could see one receiving +the bread into his belly, under the figure of a _mastiff_, another under +that of a _swine_, another like a _mole_, another like a _winged +serpent_, and a few, O how very few, receiving a ray of celestial light +with the bread and the wine. "Yonder," said he, "is a roundhead who is +about to become sheriff, and because the law enjoins, that every one +shall receive the communion in the church before he obtains the office, +he has come hither rather than lose it; but though there are many here +who rejoice at seeing him, there has been no joy amongst us for his +conversion, for he has only turned for the time; and thus you see how +bold Hypocrisy must be to present herself at the altar before Emmanuel, +who is not to be deceived. But however great she be in the city of +Perdition, she can effect nothing in the city of Emmanuel, above the wall +yonder." + +Thereupon we turned our faces from the great city of Perdition, and went +up to the other little city. In going along I could see at the upper end +of the streets, many turning half-way from the temptations of the _gates +of Perdition_, and seeking for the _gate of Life_; but whether it was +that they failed to find it, or grew tired upon the way, I could not see +that any went through, except one sorrowful faced man, who ran forward +resolutely, while thousands on each side of him were calling him fool, +some scoffing him, others threatening, him and his friends laying hold +upon him, and entreating him not to take a step by which he would lose +the whole world at once. "I only lose," said he, "a very small portion +of it, and if I should lose the whole, pray what loss is it? For what is +there in the world so desirable, unless a man should desire deceit, and +violence, and misery, and wretchedness, giddiness and distraction. +_Contentment and tranquillity_," said he, "constitute the happiness of +man; but in your city there are no such things to be found. Because who +is there here content with his station? _Higher_, _higher_, is what +every one endeavours to be in the street of _Pride_; give, give us a +little more, says every one in the street of _Lucre_; sweet, sweet, pray +give me some more of it, is the cry of every one in the street of +_Pleasure_. And as for tranquillity, where is it? and who obtains it? If +you be a great man, flattery and envy are killing you; if you be poor, +every one is trampling upon and despising you; after having become an +inventor, if you exalt your head and seek for praise, you will be called +a boaster and a coxcomb; if you lead a godly life and resort to the +church and the altar, you will be called a hypocrite; if you do not, then +you are an infidel or a heretic; if you be merry, you will be called a +buffoon; if you are silent, you will be called a morose wretch; if you +follow honesty, you are nothing but a simple fool; if you go neat, you +are proud, if not, a swine; if you are smooth speaking, then you are +false, or a trifler without meaning; if you are rough, you are an +arrogant, disagreeable devil. Behold the world that you magnify," said +he, "pray take my share of it." Whereupon he shook himself loose from +them all, and away he went undauntedly to the narrow gate, and in spite +of every obstacle he pushed his way through, we following him; while many +men dressed in black upon the walls, on both sides of the gate, kept +inviting the man and praising him. "Who," said I, "are the men above +dressed in black?" "The watchmen of the king Emmanuel," replied the +angel, "who, in the name of their master, are inviting people and +assisting them through this gate." + +By this time we were by the gate; it was very low and narrow, and mean in +comparison with the lower gates. On the two sides of the door were the +_ten commandments_; upon the first slab on the right side was written, +"_love the Lord with thy whole heart_, _&c._," and upon the second slab +on the other side, "love thy neighbour as thyself;" and above the whole, +"_love not the world nor the things which are therein_." I had not +looked long before the watchmen began to cry out to the men of Perdition, +"Flee! flee, for your lives!" Only a very few turned towards them once, +some of whom asked, "flee from what?" "From the prince of this world, +who reigns in the children of disobedience," said the watchman; "flee +from the pollutions which are in the world through the lusts of the +flesh, the lusts of the eyes, and the vanities of life; flee from the +wrath which is coming to overwhelm you!" "What," exclaimed the other +watchman, "is your beloved city but a vast glowing roof cast over Hell, +and if you were here, you might see the fire on the farther side of your +walls kindling, to burn you down into Hell." Some mocked them, others +threatened to stone them unless they ceased their unmannerly prate; but +some few asked, "whither shall we fly?" "Hither," said the watchman, +"fly hither to your lawful king, who yet offers you pardon through us, if +you return to your obedience, and abandon the rebel Belial and his +deceitful daughters. Though their appearance is so splendid, it is only +deception; Belial at home is but a very poor prince, he has only you for +fuel, and only you as roast and boiled to gnaw, and you are never +sufficient, and there will never be an end to his hunger and your +torments. And who would serve such a malicious butcher, in a temporary +delirium here, and in eternal torments hereafter, who could obtain a life +of happiness under a king merciful and charitable to his subjects, who is +ever doing towards them the good offices of a shepherd, and endeavouring +to keep them from Belial, in order finally to give to each of them the +kingdom in the country of Light? O fools! will ye take the horrible +enemy whose throat is burning with thirst for your blood, instead of the +compassionate prince who has given his own blood to assist you?" But it +did not appear that these reasonings, which were sufficient to soften a +rock, proved of much advantage to them, and the principal cause of their +being so unsuccessful was, that not many had leisure to hear, the greater +part being employed in looking at the gates; and of those who did hear, +there were not many who heeded, and of those there were not many who long +remembered; some would not believe that it was Belial whom they were +serving, others could not conceive that yonder little, untrodden passage +was the gate of Life, and would not believe that the three other +glittering gates were delusion, the castle preventing them from seeing +their destruction till they rushed upon it. + +At this moment there came a troop of people from the street of Pride, and +knocked at the gate with great confidence but they were all so +stiffnecked, that they could never go into a place so low, without +soiling their perriwigs and their plumes, so they walked back in great +ill humour. At the tail of these came a party from the street of Lucre. +Said one, "is this the gate of Life?" "Yea," replied the watchmen who +were above. "What is to be done," said he, "in order to pass through?" +"Read on each side of the door, and you will learn." The miser read the +ten commandments. "Who," he cried, "will say, that I have broken one of +these?" But on looking aloft and seeing, "_love not the world_, _nor the +things that are therein_," he started, and could not swallow that +difficult sentence. There was among them an envious pig-tail who turned +back on reading, "_love thy neighbour as thyself_;" and a perjurer, and a +slanderer turned abruptly back on reading, "_bear not false witness_;" +some physicians on reading, "_thou shalt commit no murder_," exclaimed +"this is no place for us." To be brief, every one saw there something +which troubled him, so they all went back to chew the cud. I may add, +that there was not one of these people, but had so many bags and writings +stuck about him, that he could never have gone through a place so narrow, +even if he had made the attempt. + +Presently there came a drove from the street of Pleasure walking towards +the gate. "Please to inform us," said one to the watchman, "to what +place this road is leading?" "This is the road," said the watchman, +"which leads to eternal joy and happiness;" whereupon they all strove to +get through, but they failed, for some had too much belly for a place so +narrow; others were too weak to push, having been enfeebled by women, who +impeded them moreover with their foolish whims. "O," said the watchman +who was looking upon them, "it is of no use for you to attempt to go +through with your vain toys; you must leave your pots, and your dishes, +and your harlots, and all your other ware behind you, and then make +haste." "How should we live then?" said the fiddler, who would have been +through long ago, but for fear of breaking his instrument. "O," said the +watchman, "you must take the word of the king, for sending you whatsover +things may be for your advantage." "Hey, hey," said one, "_a bird in the +hand is worth two in the bush_;" and thereupon they all unanimously +turned back. + +"Come through now," said the angel, and he drew me in, and the first +thing I saw in the porch was a large baptismal font, and by the side of +it a spring of saline water. "Why is this here at the entrance of the +road?" said I. "It is here," said the angel, "because every one must +wash himself therein, previous to obtaining honour in the palace of +Emmanuel; it is termed the _fountain of repentance_." Above I could see +written, "_this is the gate of the Lord_, &c." The porch and also the +street expanded, and became less difficult as one went forward. When we +had gone a little way up the street I could hear a soft voice behind me +saying, "_this is the road_, _walk in it_." The street was up-hill but +was very clean and straight, and though the houses were lower here than +in the city of _Perdition_, yet they were more pleasant. If there is +here less wealth, there is also less strife and care; if there are fewer +dishes, there are fewer diseases; if there is less noise, there is also +less sadness, and more pure joy. I was surprised at the calmness and the +delightful tranquillity that reigned here, so little resembling what I +had found below. Instead of swearing and cursing, buffoonery, +debauchery, and drunkenness; instead of pride and vanity, torpor in the +one corner, and riot in the other; instead of all the loud broiling, and +the boasting and bustling, and chattering, which were incessantly +stupifying a man yonder; and instead of the numberless constant evils to +be found below, you here saw sobriety, affability and cheerfulness, peace +and thankfulness, clemency, innocence, and content upon the face of every +body. No weeping here, except for the pollutions pervading the city of +the enemy; no hatred or anger, except against sin; and that same hatred +and anger against sin, always accompanied with a certainty of being able +to subdue it; no fear but of incensing the King, who was ever more ready +to forgive than be angry with his subjects; and here there was no sound +but of psalms of praise to the heavenly guardian. + +By this time we had come in sight of a building superlatively beautiful. +O, how glorious it was! No one in the city of Perdition--neither the +Turk nor the Mogul, nor any of the others, possessed any thing equal to +it. "Behold the _Catholic Church_!" said the angel. "Is it here that +Emmanuel keeps his court?" said I. "Yes," he replied, "this is his only +terrestrial palace." "Has he any crowned heads under him?" said I. "A +few," was the answer. "There are your good queen Anne, and some princes +of Denmark and Germany, and a few of the other small princes." "What are +they," said I, "compared with those who are under Belial the Great? He +has emperors and kings without number." "Notwithstanding all this;" said +the angel, "not one of them can move a finger without the permission of +Emmanuel, nor Belial himself either, because Emmanuel is his lawful king; +Belial rebelled, and for his rebellion was made a captive, with +permission however to visit for a little time the city of Perdition, and +delude any one he could into his own rebellion and a share of his +punishment. So great is his malice, that he is continually using this +permission, though aware that by so doing he will only add to his own +misery; and so great is his love of wickedness, that he takes advantage +of his half liberty, to seek to destroy this city and this edifice, +though he has long known that their guardian is invincible." + +"Pray, my lord," said I, "may we approach and take a more minute view of +this magnificent palace?" for my heart had warmed towards the place at +the first sight. "Certainly you may," said the angel, "because there I +have my place, charge, and employment." The nearer we went to it, the +more I wondered, seeing how lofty, strong, beautiful, pure, and lovely +every part of it was; how accurate was the workmanship, and how fair were +its materials. A rock wrought with immense labour, and of prodigious +strength was the foundation stone; living stones were placed upon this +rock, and were cemented in so admirable a manner, that it was impossible +for one stone to be so beautiful in another place, as it was in its own. +I could see one part of the _church_ which cast out a very fair and +remarkable cross, and the angel perceiving me gazing upon it asked me "if +I knew that part." I did not know what to answer. "That is the _Church +of England_," said he. These words made me observe it with more +attention than before, and on looking up I could perceive queen Anne, on +the pinnacle of the building, with a sword in each hand. With the one in +her left, which is called Justice, she preserves her subjects from the +men of the city of Perdition; and with the other in her right, which is +the sword of the Spirit, or the word of God, she preserves them from +Belial and his spiritual evils. Under the left sword were the _Laws of +England_; under the other was a large _Bible_. The sword of the Spirit +was fiery and of prodigious length, it would kill at a distance to which +the other sword could not reach. I observed the other princes with the +same arms, defending their portions of the church; but I could see that +the portion of my queen was the fairest, and that her arms were the most +bright. By her right hand, I could see a multitude of people in +black--archbishops, bishops, and teachers, assisting her in sustaining +the sword of the Spirit; and some of the soldiers and civil officers, and +a few, very few of the lawyers, supporting, along with her, the other +sword. I obtained permission to rest a little by one of the magnificent +doors, whither people were coming to obtain the dignity of the _universal +church_; a tall angel was keeping the door, and the church within side +was so vividly light, that it was useless for _Hypocrisy_ to show her +visage there--she sometimes appeared at the door, but never went in. +After I had been gazing about a quarter of an hour, there came a +_papist_, who imagined that the Pope possessed the catholic church, and +he claimed his share of dignity. "What proof of your dignity have you?" +said the porter. "I have plenty," said he, "of _traditions of the +fathers_, and _acts of the congresses of the church_; but what further +assurance do I need, than the word of the Pope, who sits upon the +infallible chair?" Then the porter proceeded to open an exceedingly +large Bible. "Behold," said he, "the only Statute Book which we use +here, prove your claim out of that, or depart;" whereupon he departed. + +At this moment there came a drove of Quakers, who wanted to go in with +their hats upon their heads, but they were turned back for their +unmannerly behaviour. After that, some of the children of the barn, who +had been there for some time, began to speak. "We have," said they, "no +other statute than you, therefore show us our dignity." "Stay," said the +glittering porter, looking them fixedly in the face, "and I will show you +something. Do you see yonder," said he, "the rent which you made in the +church, that you might go out of it, without the slightest cause or +reason? and now, what do you want here? Go back to the narrow gate, wash +yourselves well in the fountain of repentance, in order to free +yourselves from some of the kingly blood, in which you steeped yourselves +formerly; bring some of that water to moisten the clay, to close up the +rent yonder, and then, and then only, you shall be welcome." But before +we had proceeded a rood farther towards the west, we heard a buzz amongst +the princes above, and every one, great and small, seized his arms, and +proceeded to harness himself as if for battle; and before we had time to +espy a place to flee to, the whole air became dark, and the city was more +deeply over-shadowed than during an eclipse; the thunder began to roar, +and the lightnings to dart forkedly, and a ceaseless shower of mortal +arrows, was directed from the gates below, against the catholic church; +and unless every one had had a shield in his hand to receive the fiery +darts, and unless the foundation stone had been too strong for any thing +to make an impression upon it, you would have seen the whole in +conflagration. But alas! this was but the prologue, or a foretaste of +what was to follow; for the darkness speedily became seven times blacker, +and _Belial_ himself appeared upon the densest cloud, and around him were +his choicest warriors, both terrestrial and infernal, to receive and +execute his will, on their particular sides. He had enjoined the Pope, +and the king of France, his other son, to destroy the church of England +and its queen; and the Turk and the Muscovite, to break to pieces the +other parts of the Church, and to slay the people; the queen and the +other princes, were by no means to be spared; and the Bible was to be +burned in spite of every thing. The first thing which the queen and the +other saints did, was to fall upon their knees, and complain of their +wrongs to the King of kings, in these words:--"_The spreading of his +wings covereth the extent of thy land_, _O Emmanuel_!" Isaiah 8. iii. +This complaint was answered by a voice, which said, "_resist the devil +and he will flee from you_;" and then ensued the hardest and most +stubborn engagement, which had ever been upon the earth. When the _sword +of the Spirit_ began to be waved, Belial and his infernal legions began +to retreat, and the Pope to falter. The king of France, it is true, held +out; yet even he nearly lost heart, for he saw the queen and her subjects +united and prosperous, whilst his own ships were sunk, his soldiers +slaughtered, and thousands of his subjects rebelling. The very Turk was +becoming as gentle as a lamb; but just at that moment my heavenly +associate quitted me, darting up towards the firmament, to myriads of +other shining powers, and my dream was at an end. Yes, just as the Pope +and the other terrestrial powers, were beginning to sneak away, and to +faint, and the potentates of hell to fall by tens of thousands, each +making, to my imagination's ear, as much noise as if a huge mountain had +been precipitated into the depths of the sea, my companion quitted me, +and there was an end of my dream; for what with the noise made by the +fiends, and the agitation which I felt at losing my companion, I awoke +from my sleep, and returned with the utmost reluctance to my sluggish +clod, thinking how noble and delightful it was to be a _free_ spirit, to +wander about in angelic company, quite secure, though seemingly in the +midst of peril. I had now nothing to console me, save the Muse, and she +being half angry, would do nothing more than bleat to me the following +strains. + + + +The Perishing World. + + +O man, upon this building gaze, +The mansion of the human race, +The world terrestrial see! +Its architect's the King on high, +Who ne'er was born and ne'er will die-- +The blest Divinity. +The world, its wall, its starlights all, +Its stores, where'er they lie, +Its wondrous brute variety, +Its reptiles, fish, and birds that fly, + +And cannot number'd be, +The God above, to show his love, +Did give, O man, to thee. +For man, for man, whom he did plan, +God caus'd arise +This edifice, +Equal to heaven in all but size, +Beneath the sun so fair; +Then it he view'd, and that 'twas good +For man, he was aware. + +Man only sought to know at first +Evil, and of the thing accursed +Obtain a sample small. +The sample grew a giantess, +'Tis easy from her size to guess +The whole her prey will fall. +Cellar and turret high, +Through hell's dark treachery, +Now reeling, rocking terribly, +In swooning pangs appear; +The orchards round, are only found +Vile sedge and weeds to bear; +The roof gives way, more, more each day, +The walls too, spite +Of all their might, +Have frightful cracks, down all their height, +Which coming ruin show; +The dragons tell, that danger fell, +Now lurks the house below. + +O man! this building fair and proud, +From its foundation to the cloud, +Is all in dangerous plight; +Beneath thee quakes and shakes the ground; +'Tis all, e'en down to hell's profound, +A bog that scares the sight. +The sin man wrought, the deluge brought, +And without fail +A fiery gale, +Before which every thing shall quail, +His deeds shall waken now; +Worse evermore, till all is o'er, +Thy case, O world, shall grow. +There's one place free, yet, man for thee, +Where mercies reign, +A place to which thou may'st attain, +Seek there a residence to gain +Lest thou in caverns howl; +For save thou there shalt quick repair, +Woe to thy wretched soul! + +Towards yon building turn your face! +Too strong by far is yonder place +To lose the victory. +'Tis better than the reeling world; +For all the ills by hell uphurl'd +It has a remedy. +Sublime it braves the wildest waves; +It is a refuge place +Impregnable to Belial's race, +With stones, emitting vivid rays, +Above its stately porch; +Itself, and those therein, compose +The universal church. +Though slaves of sin we long have been, +With faith sincere +We shall win pardon there; +Then in let's press, O, brethren dear, +And claim our dignity! +By doing so, we saints below +And saints on high shall be. + + + + +A Vision of Death in his Palace Below. + + +In one of the long, black, chilly nights of winter, when it was much +warmer in a kitchen of Glyn-cywarch, than on the summit of Cadair Idris, +and much more pleasant to be in a snug chamber, with a warm bed-fellow, +than in a shroud in the church yard, I was mussing upon some discourses +which had passed between me and a neighbour, upon _the shortness of human +life_, and how certain every one is of dying, and how uncertain as to the +time. Whilst thus engaged, having but newly laid my head down upon the +pillow, and being about half awake, I felt a great weight coming +stealthily upon me, from the crown of my head to my heel, so that I could +not stir a finger, nor any thing except my tongue, and beheld a lad upon +my breast, and a lass mounted upon his back. On looking sharply, I +guessed, from the warm smell which came from him, his clammy locks, and +his gummy eyes, that the lad must be _master Sleep_. "Pray, sir," said +I, squealing, "what have I done to you, that you bring that witch here to +suffocate me?" "Hush," said he, "it is only my sister _Nightmare_; we +are both going to visit our brother _Death_, and have need of a third, +and lest you should resist, we have come upon you without warning, as he +himself will sometime; therefore you must come, whether you will or not." +"Alas!" said I, "must I die?" "O no," said _Nightmare_; "we will spare +you this time." "But with your favour," said I, "your brother Death +never spared any one yet who was brought within reach of his dart; the +fellow even ventured to fling a fall with the Lord of Life himself, +though it is true he gained very little by his daring." At these words +_Nightmare_ arose full of wrath and departed. "Hey," said _Sleep_, "come +away, and you shall have no cause to repent of your journey." "Well," +said I, "may there never be night to _saint Sleep_, and may _Nightmare_ +never obtain any other place to crouch upon than the top of an awl, +unless you return me to where you found me." Then away he went with me, +over woods and precipices, over oceans and valleys, over castles and +towers, rivers and crags; and where did we descend, but by one of the +gates of the daughters of Belial, on the posterior side of the _city of +Perdition_, and I could there perceive, that the three gates of Perdition +contracted into one on the hinder side, and opened into the same place--a +place foggy, cold, and pestilential, replete with an unwholesome vapour, +and clouds, lowering and terrible. "Pray, sir," said I, "what dungeon of +a place is this?" "_The chambers of Death_," said _Sleep_. I had +scarcely time to enquire, before I heard some people crying, some +screaming, some groaning, some talking deliriously, some uttering +blasphemies in a feeble tone: others in great agony, as if about to give +up the ghost. Here and there one, after a mighty shout would become +silent, and then forthwith I could hear a key revolving in a lock; I +turned at the sound to look for the door, and by dint of long gazing, I +could see tens of thousands of doors, apparently far off though close by +my side notwithstanding. "Please to inform me, master Sleep," said I, +"to what place these doors open?" "They open," he replied, "into the +_land of Oblivion_, a vast country under the rule of my brother Death; +and the great wall here, is the limit of the immense eternity." As I +looked I could see a little death at each door, all with different arms, +and different names, though evidently they were all subjects of the same +king. Notwithstanding which, there was much contention between them +concerning the sick; for the one wished to snatch the sick through his +door, and the other would fain have him through his own. On drawing +near, we could see above every door, the name of the death written, who +kept it; and likewise by every door, hundreds of various things left +scattered about, denoting the haste of those who went through. Over one +door I could see _Famine_, though purses and full bags were lying on the +ground beside it, and boxes nailed up, standing near. "That," said he, +"is the gate of the _misers_." "To whom," said I, "do these rags +belong?" "Principally to misers," he replied; "but there are some there +belonging to lazy idlers, and to ballad singers, and to others, poor in +every thing, but spirit, who preferred starvation to begging." In the +next door was the death of the _Ruling Passion_, and parallel with it I +could hear many voices, as of men in the extremity of cold. By this door +were many books, some pots and flaggons, here and there a staff and a +walking stick, some compasses and charts, and shipping tackle. "This is +the road by which scholars go," said I. "Some scholars go by it," said +he, "solitary, helpless wretches, whose relations have stripped them of +their last article of raiment; but people of various other descriptions +go by it also. Those," said he, (speaking of the pots,) "are the relics +of jolly companions, whose feet are freezing under benches, whilst their +heads are boiling with drink and uproar; and the things yonder belong to +travellers of snowy mountains, and to traffickers in the North sea." + +Next at hand was a meagre skeleton of a figure, called the _death of +Fear_. Through his exterior you might see that he did not possess any +heart; and by his door there were bags, and chests also, and locks and +castles. By this gate went usurers, bad governors and tyrants, and some +of the murderers, but the plurality of the latter were driven past to the +next gate, where there was a death called _Gallows_, with his cord ready +for their necks. + +Next was to be seen the _death of Love_, and by his feet were hundreds of +instruments, and books of music, and verses, and love letters, and also +ointments and colors to beautify the countenance, and a thousand other +embellishing wares, and also some swords. "With some of those swords," +said my companion, "bandits have been slain whilst fighting for women, +and with others, love-lorn creatures have stabbed themselves." I could +perceive that this death was purblind. + +At the next door, was a death who had the most repulsive figure of all: +his entire liver was consumed. He was called the _death of Envy_. "This +one," said Sleep, "assaults losing gamesters, slanderers, and many a +female rider, who repineth at the law which rendered the wife subject to +her husband." "Pray, sir," said I, "what is the meaning of female +rider?" "Female rider," said he, "is the term used here, for the woman +who would ride her husband, her neighbours, and her country too, if +possible, and the end of her long riding will be, that she will ride the +Devil, from that door, down to hell." + +Next stood the door of the _death of Ambition_, and of those who lift +their nostrils on high, and break their shins for want of looking beneath +their feet. Beside this door were crowns, sceptres, banners, all sorts +of patents and commissions, and all kinds of heraldric and warlike arms. + +But before I could look on any more of these countless doors, I heard a +voice commanding me by my name to prepare. At this word, I could feel +myself beginning to melt, like a snow ball in the heat of the sun; +whereupon my master gave me some soporific drink, so that I fell asleep, +but by the time I awoke, he had conveyed me to a considerable distance, +on the other side of the wall. I found myself in a valley of pitchy +darkness, and as it seemed to me, limitless. At the end of a little +time, I could see by a dim light, like that of a dying candle, +innumerable human shades--some on foot, and some on horseback, running +through one another like the wind, silently and with wonderful solemnity. + +It was a desert, bare, and blasted country, without grass, or vegetation, +or woods, and without animals, with the exception of deadly monsters, and +venomous reptiles of every kind; serpents, snakes, lice, toads, +maw-worms, locusts, ear-wigs, and the like, which all exist on human +corruption. Through myriads of shades, and creeping things, graves, +sepulchres, and cemeteries, we proceeded, without interruption, to +observe the country. At last I perceived some of the shades turning and +looking upon me; and suddenly, notwithstanding the great silence that had +prevailed before, there was a whispering from one to the other that there +was a _living man_ at hand. "A living man," said one; "a living man," +said the other; and they came thronging about me like caterpillars from +every corner. "How did you come hither, sirrah?" said a little morkin of +a death who was there. "Truly sir," said I, "I know no more than +yourself." "What do they call you?" he demanded. "Call me what you +please, here in your own country," I replied, "but at home I am called +_the Sleeping Bard_." + +At that word I beheld a crooked old man, with a double head like to a +rough-barked thorn tree, raising himself erect, and looking upon me worse +than the black devil himself; and lo! without saying a word, he hurled a +large human skull at my head--many thanks to a tombstone which shielded +me. "Pray be quiet, sir," said I. "I am but a stranger, who was never +here before, and you may be sure I will never return, if I can once reach +home again." "I will give you cause to remember having been here," said +he; and attacked me with a thigh-bone, like a very devil, whilst I +avoided his blows as well as I could. "By heavens," said I, "this is a +most inhospitable country to strangers. Is there a justice of the peace +here?" "Peace!" said he, "what peace do you deserve, who will not let +people rest in their graves?" "Pray, sir," said I, "may I be allowed to +know your name, because I am not aware of ever having disturbed any one +in this country." "Sirrah," said he, "know that not you are the Sleeping +Bard, but that I am that person; and I have been allowed to rest here for +nine hundred years, by every one but yourself." And he attacked me +again. + +"Forbear, my brother," said Merddyn, who was near at hand, "be not too +hot; rather be thankful to him for keeping an honorable remembrance of +your name upon earth." "Great honor forsooth," said he, "I shall receive +from such a blockhead as this. Sirrah! can you sing in the +four-and-twenty measures? Can you carry the pedigree of Gog and Magog, +and the genealogy of Brutus ap Sylfius, up to a millenium previous to the +fall of Troy? Can you narrate when, and what will be the end of the +combats betwixt the lion and the eagle, and betwixt the dragon and the +red deer?" "Hey, hey! let me ask him a question," said another, who was +seated beside a large cauldron which was boiling, and going, bubble, +bubble, over a fire. "Come nearer," said he, "what is the meaning of +this?" + + "I till the judgment day + Upon the earth shall stray; + None knows for certainty + Whether fish or flesh I be." + +"I will request the favor of your name, sir," said I, "that I may answer +you in a suitable manner." "I," said he, "am Taliesin, {49} the prince +of the Bards of the West, and that is a piece of my composition." "I +know not," said I, "what could be your meaning, unless it was, that the +yellow plague {50} which destroyed Maelgwn of Gwynedd, put an end to you +on the sea-shore, and that your body was divided amongst the crows and +the fishes." "Peace, fool!" said he, "I was alluding to my two callings, +of man of the law and poet. Please to tell me, has a lawyer more +similitude to a raven, than a poet to a whale? How many a one doth a +single lawyer divest of his flesh, to swell out his own craw; and with +what indifference does he extract the blood, and leave a man half alive! +And as for the poet, where is the fish which is able to swallow like him? +he is drinking oceans of liquor at all times, but the briny sea itself +would not slack his thirst. And provided a man be a poet and a lawyer, +how is it possible to know whether he be fish or flesh, especially if he +be a courtier to boot, as I was, and obliged to vary his taste to every +ones palate. But tell me," said he, "whether there are at present, any +of those fellows upon the earth?" "There's plenty of them," said I; "if +one can patch together any nonsensical derry, he is styled a graduate +bard. But as for the others; there is such a plague of lawyers, petty +attornies, and scribes, that the locusts of Egypt bore light upon the +country, in comparison with them. In your time, sir, there were but +bargains of tofts and crofts, and a hand's breadth of writing for a farm +of a hundred pounds, and a raising of cairns and crosses, as memorials of +the purchase and boundaries. There is no longer any such security, but +there is far more craft and deceit, and a tombstone's breadth of written +parchment to secure the bargain; and for all that, it is a wonder if a +flaw be not in it, or said to be at least." "Well then," said Taliesin, +"I should not be worth a straw in the world at present. I am better +where I am. Truth will never be had where there are many poets, nor fair +dealing where there are many lawyers; no, nor health where there are many +physicians." At this moment, a little grey-headed hobgoblin, who had +heard that a living man was arrived, flung himself at my feet, weeping +abundantly. "Dear me," said I, "what are you?" "One who is grievously +wronged every day in the world," said he. "May God move your soul to +procure justice for me." "What is your name?" said I. "I am called +_Somebody_," he replied, "and there is scarcely a piece of pimping, or a +calumny, or a lie, or tale, to set people at loggerheads, but must be +laid upon me. 'Verily,' says one, 'she is a prodigious fine girl, and +she was praising you before somebody, notwithstanding that some very +great person is paying his suit to her.' 'I heard somebody,' says +another, 'reckoning that this estate was mortgaged nine hundred pounds +deep.' 'I saw some one yesterday,' says the beggar, 'with a chequered +slop, like a sailor, who had come with a large ship load of corn, to the +neighbouring port.' And thus every ragged dog mangles me for his own +wicked purposes. Some call me Friend--'I was informed by a friend,' says +one, 'that so and so has no intention of leaving a farthing to his wife, +and that there is no affection between them.' Some others vilify me yet +more, and call me Bird--'A bird whistled in my ear, that there are bad +practices going on there,' say they. It is true, some call me by the +more respectable name of Old Person; yet, not half the omens, prophecies, +and counsels, which are attributed to the Old Person, belong to me. I +have never bidden people to follow the old road, provided the new one be +better, nor a hundred similar things. But Somebody is my common name," +he continued, "him you will most frequently hear, to have been concerned +in every atrocious matter. Because, ask a person wherever a vile, +slanderous falsehood has been uttered, who it was who said it, and he +will reply, 'Truly I don't know who, but somebody in the company said +it;' question then every one in the company concerning the fable, and +every one will say he heard it from somebody, but no one knows from whom. +Is not this a shameful injury?" he demanded. "Be so good as to inform +every one whom you may hear naming me, that I have never said any one of +these things, nor have ever invented nor uttered a lie to slander any +one, nor a story to set relations by the ears; that I do not go near +them; that I know nothing of their history, nor of their affairs, nor of +their accursed secrets; and that they ought not to fling their wickedness +upon me, but on their own corrupt brains." + +At this moment there came a little death, one of the secretaries of the +king, desiring to know my name, and commanding master Sleep, to carry me +instantly before the king. I was compelled to go, though utterly against +my will, by the power, which, like a whirlwind carried me away, betwixt +high and low, thousands of miles back to the left hand, until we came +again in sight of the boundary wall, and reached a narrow corner. Here +we perceived an immense, frowning, ruinous palace, open at the top, +reaching to the wall where were the innumerable doors, all of which led +to this huge, terrific court. The walls were constructed with the sculls +of men, which grinned horribly with their teeth. The clay was black, and +was prepared with tears and sweat; and the mortar on the outside was +variegated with phlegm and pus, and on the inside with black-red blood. +On the top of each turret, you might see a little death, with a smoking +heart stuck on the point of his dart. + +Around the palace was a wood, consisting of a few poisonous yews and +deadly cypresses, and in these, owls, blood crows, vultures and the like +were nestling; and croaking continually for flesh, though the whole place +was nothing but a stinking shamble. We entered the gate. All the +pillars of the hall were made of human thigh bones; the pillars of the +parlour were of shank bones; and the floors were one continued layer of +every species of offal. It was not long before I came in sight of a vast +and frightful altar, where I beheld the king of Terrors swallowing human +flesh and blood, and a thousand petty deaths, from every hole, feeding +him with fresh, warm flesh. "Behold," said the death who brought me +there, addressing himself to the king, "a spark, whom I found in the +midst of the land of Oblivion; he came so light footed, that your majesty +never tasted a morsel of him." "How can that be?" said the king, and +opened his jaws as wide as an earthquake to swallow me. Whereupon I +turned all trembling to Sleep. "It was I," said Sleep, "who brought him +here." "Well," said the meagre, grizly king, turning to me, "for my +brother Sleep's sake, you shall be permitted to return this time, but +beware of me the next." After having employed himself for a considerable +time in casting carcasses into his insatiable paunch, he caused his +subjects to be called together, and moved from the altar to a terrific +throne of exceeding height, to pronounce judgment on the prisoners newly +arrived. In an instant came innumerable multitudes of the dead, making +their obeisance to their king, and taking their stations in remarkable +order. And lo! king Death was in his regal vest of flaming scarlet, +covered all over with figures of women and children weeping, and men +uttering groans; about his head was a black-red three-cornered cap (which +his friend Lucifer had sent as a present to him,) and upon its corners +were written _misery_, _wailing_, and _woe_. Above his head were +thousands of representations of battles on sea and land, towns burning, +the earth opening, and the great water of the deluge; and beneath his +feet nothing was to be seen but the crowns and sceptres of the kings whom +he had overcome from the beginning. On his right hand Fate was sitting, +seemingly engaged in reading, with a murky look, a huge volume which was +before him; and on his left was an old man called _Time_, licking +innumerable threads of gold, and silver, and copper, and very many of +iron. Some few of the threads were growing better towards their end, and +thousands growing worse. Along the threads were hours, days, and years; +and Fate, according as his volume directed him, was continually breaking +the threads of life, and opening the doors of the boundary wall, betwixt +the two worlds. + +We had not looked around us long, before we heard four fiddlers, newly +dead, summoned to the bar. "How comes it," said the king of Terrors, +"that loving merriment as ye do, ye kept not on the other side of the +gulf, for there has never been any merriment on this side." "We have +never done," said one of the musicians, "harm to any body, but have +rendered people joyous, and have taken quietly what they gave us for our +pains." Said Death, "did you never keep any one from his work, and cause +him to lose his time; or did you never keep people from church? ha!" "O +no!" said another, "perhaps now and then on a Sunday, after service, we +may have kept some in the public house till the next morning, or during +summer tide, may have kept them dancing in the ring on the green all +night; for sure enough, we were more liked, and more lucky in obtaining a +congregation than the parson." "Away, away with these fellows to the +country of Despair!" said the terrific king, "bind the four back to back +and cast them to their customers, to dance bare-footed on floors of +glowing heat, and to amble to all eternity without either praise or +music." + +The next that came to the bar was a certain king, who had lived very near +to Rome. "Hold up your hand, prisoner," said one of the officers. "I +hope," said he, "that you have some better manners and favour to show to +a king." "Sirrah," said Death, "why did you not keep on the other side +of the gulf where all are kings? On this side there is none but myself, +and another down below, and you will soon see, that neither he nor I will +rate you according to the degree of your majesty, but according to the +degree of your wickedness, in order to adapt your punishment to your +crimes, therefore answer to the interrogation." "Sir," he replied, "I +would have you know, that you have no authority to detain me, nor to +interrogate me, as I have a pardon for all my sins under the Pope's own +hand. On account of my faithful services, he has given me a warrant to +go straight to Paradise, without tarrying one moment in Purgatory." At +these words the king and all the haggard train gave a ghastly grin, to +escape from laughing outright; but the other full of wrath at their +ridicule, commanded them aloud to show him the way. "Peace, thou lost +fool!" cried Death, "Purgatory lies behind you, on the other side of the +wall, for you ought to purify yourself during your life; and on the right +hand, on the other side of that gulf is Paradise. But there is no road +by which it is possible for you to escape, either through the gulf to +Paradise, or through the boundary wall back to the world; and if you were +to give your kingdom, (supposing you could give it,) you would not obtain +permission from the keepers of those doors, to take one peep through the +key hole. It is called the irrepassable wall, for when once you have +come through you may abandon all hope of returning. But since you stand +so high on the books of the Pope, you shall go and prepare his bed, +beside that of the Pope who was before him, and there you shall kiss his +toe for ever, and he the toe of Lucifer." + +Immediately thereupon, four little deaths raised the poor king up, who +was by this time shivering like the leaf of an aspen, and snatched him +out of sight like lightning. Next after him came a young fellow and +woman. He had been a jolly companion and she a lady of pleasure, or one +free of her person; but they were called here by their naked names, +drunkard and harlot. "I hope," said the drunkard, "I shall find some +favour with you; I have sent to you many a bloated booty in a torrent of +good ale; and when I failed to kill others, I came myself, willingly, to +feed you." "With the permission of the court," said the harlot, "you +have not sent half as much as I, and my offerings were burning +sacrifices, rich roast meat ready for the board." "Hey, hey!" said +Death, "all this was done for your own accursed passions' sake and not to +feed me. Bind the two face to face, as they are old acquaintances, and +cast them into the land of Darkness, and let each be a torment to the +other, until the day of judgment." They were then snatched away, with +their heads downwards. + +Next to these there came seven recorders. Having been commanded to raise +their hands to the bar, they would by no means obey, as the rails were +greasy. One began to wrangle boisterously; "we ought to obtain a fair +citation to prepare our answer;" said he, "instead of being rushed upon +unawares." + +"But are we bound to give you that same specific citation," answered +Death, "since you obtain in every place, and at every period of your +life, warning of my coming. How many sermons have you not heard upon the +mortality of man? How many books have you not seen? How many graves, +how many sculls, how many diseases, how many messages and signs have you +not had? What is your Sleep, but my own brother? What are sculls, but +my visage? What does your daily food consist of but dead creatures? Seek +not to cast your neglect upon me. Speak not of summons, when you have +obtained it a hundred times." "Pray," said one red recorder, "what have +you to advance against us?" "What?" said Death. "Drinking the sweat and +blood of the poor, and levying double your wages." "Here is an honest +man," replied the recorder, pointing to a pettifogger behind him, "who +knows that we have never done any thing but what was fair; and it is not +fair of you to detain us here, without a specific crime to prove against +us." "Hey, hey!" said Death, "you shall prove against yourselves. Place +these people," said he, "on the verge of the _precipice_ before the +tribunal of _Justice_, they shall obtain equity there though they never +practiced it." + +There were still seven other prisoners remaining, and these kept up a +prodigious bustle and noise. Some were flattering, others quarrelling, +some blustering, some counselling, &c. Scarcely had they been called to +the bar, when lo! the entire palace became seven times more horribly dark +than before, and there was a shivering and a great agitation about the +throne, and Death became paler than ever. Upon enquiring what was the +matter, one of the messengers of Lucifer stepped forward with a letter +for Death, concerning these seven prisoners, and Fate presently caused +the letter to be read publicly, and these were the words, as far as I can +remember. + + "_Lucifer_, _King of the kings of the world_, _prince of Hell_, _and + ruler of the Deep_, _to our natural son_, _the most mighty and + terrible king Death_, _greeting_, _pre-eminence_, _and eternal spoil_. + + "For as much as we have been informed by some of our nimble + messengers, who are constantly abroad to obtain information, that + seven prisoners, of the seven most villainous and dangerous species in + the world, have arrived lately at your royal palace, and that it is + your intention to hurl them over the cliff into my kingdom. I hereby + counsel you to try every possible means, to let them loose back again + upon the world; they will do you there more service in sending you + food, and sending me better company, for I would rather want than have + them; we have had but too much plague with their companions for a long + time, and my dominion is still disturbed by them. Therefore turn them + back, or keep them with you. For, by the infernal crown, if you send + them here, I will undermine the foundations of your kingdom, until it + falls down into my own immense dominion. + + "_From the burning hall of assembly_, _at our royal palace in the pit + of Hell_, _in the year of our reign_, 5425." + +King Death, hereupon, stood for some time with his visage green and pale, +in great perplexity of mind. But whilst he was meditating, behold +_Fate_, turned upon him such an iron-black scowl, as made him tremble. +"Sirrah," said he, "look to what you do. It is not in my power to send +any one back, through the boundary of eternity, the irrepassable wall, +nor in yours to harbour them here; therefore forward them to their +destruction, in spite of the Arch Fiend. He has been able hitherto, in a +minute to allot his proper place to every individual, in a drove of a +thousand, nay, even of ten thousand captured souls; and what difficulty +can he have with seven, however dangerous they may be. But though these +seven should turn the infernal government topsy-turvy, do you drive them +thither instantly, for fear I should receive commands to annihilate you +before your time. As for _his_ threats, they are only lies; for although +thy end, and that of the old man yonder, (looking at Time,) are nigh at +hand, being written only a few pages further on, in my unerring volume, +yet you have no cause to be afraid of sinking to Lucifer; though every +one in the abyss would be glad to obtain thee, yet they never, never +shall. For the rocks of steel and eternal adamant, which form the roof +of Hell, are too strong for anything to crumble them." Whereupon, Death, +considerably startled, called to one of his train, to write for him the +following answer. + + "_Death_, _the king of Terror and Conqueror of conquerors_, _to his + revered friend and neighbour Lucifer_, _king of Eternal Night_, + _sovereign of the Bottomless Pool_, _sends greeting_. + + "After due reflection on your regal desire, it has appeared to us more + advantageous, not only to our own dominion, but likewise to your own + extensive kingdom, to send these prisoners, as far as possible from + the doors of the irrepassable wall, lest their putrid odour should + terrify the whole city of Destruction, so that no man should come to + all eternity, to my side of the gate; and neither I obtain any thing + to cool my sting, nor you a concourse of customers from earth to hell. + Therefore I will leave to you to judge them, and to hurl them into + such cells, as you may deem the most proper and secure for them. + + "_From my nether palace in the great gate of Perdition_, _over + Destruction_. _In the year_, _from the renewal of my kingdom_, 1670." + +At hearing all this, I felt a great curiosity to know who these seven +people could be, whom the devils themselves held in so much dread. But +ere a minute had elapsed, the clerk of the crown called their names, as +follows:--Master Meddler, alias _Finger in Every Dish_; but he was so +vehement and busy in advising the others, that he could not get a +moment's time to answer for himself, until Death threatened to transfix +him with his dart. + +Then _master Slanderer_ was called, alias _Enemy of Fair Fame_; but there +was no answer. "He is too modest to hear his titles," said the third, +"and he never can bear his nicknames." "Do you suppose," said the +_Slanderer_, "that you yourself have no _titles_. Call for," said he, +"_master Coxcomb_, alias _Smooth Gullet_, alias _Poison Smile_." "Ready," +said a woman who was there, pointing to the Coxcomb. "O," said he, +"_madam Bouncer_! Your humble servant, I am overjoyed at seeing you +well. I have never seen a woman look handsomer in breeches. But, oh! to +think how miserable the country must be behind you, for want of its +admirable she-governor; yet your delightful company will make hell itself +something better." "O son of the arch fiend!" said she. "With you there +is no need of another hell, you are yourself enough." Then the cryer +called _Bouncer_, or _mistress Breeches_. "Ready," said another. But +she said not a word, for want of being called madam. Next was called +_Contriver of Contrivances_, alias _Jack of all Trades_; but he returned +no answer either, for he was busied in devising a way to escape. "Ready, +ready," said one behind, "here he is, looking out for an opportunity to +break through your palace, and unless you take care, he will have some +notable contrivance to baulk you." Said the Contriver, "call him, I +beseech you, _master Impeacher of his Brother_, alias _Searcher of +Faults_, alias _Framer of Complaints_." "Ready, ready, this is he," said +a litigious pettifogger, for every one knew the name of the other, but +would not acknowledge his own. "You shall be called," said the +Impeacher, "_master Litigious Pettifogger_, alias _the Courts +Comprised_." "Bear witness, I pray you all," said the Pettifogger, "as +to what the knave called me." "Ho, ho!" said Death, "not by the +baptismal font, but by his sins, is every one called in this country; +and, with your permission, master Pettifogger, the names of your sins are +those which shall stick to you henceforth for ever." "Hey," said the +Pettifogger, "I swear by the Devil that I will make you smart for this. +Though you are empowered to kill me, you have no authority to bestow +nicknames upon me. I will file a complaint against you for defamation, +and another for false imprisonment, against you and your friend Lucifer, +in the court of Justice." + +By this time, I beheld the legions of Death, formed in order and armed, +with their eyes fixed upon the king, awaiting the word. "There," said +the king, standing erect upon his regal throne, "my terrible and +invincible hosts, spare neither care nor diligence in removing these +prisoners from out of my boundaries, lest they prove the ruin of my +country; cast them bound, over the precipice of Despair, with their heads +downward. But for the seventh, this Courts Comprised, who threatens me, +leave him free over the chasm, beneath the court of _Justice_, and let +him try whether he can make his complaint good against me." Then Death +reseated himself. And lo! all the deadly legions, after surrounding the +prisoners and binding them, led them away to their couch. I also went +out, and peeped after them. "Come away," said Sleep, and snatched me up +to the top of the highest turret of the palace. Thence I could see the +prisoners proceeding to their eternal perdition. Presently a whirlwind +arose, and dispersed the pitch-black cloud, which was spread universally +over the face of the land of Oblivion, and by the light of a thousand +candles, which were burning with a blue flame, at a particular place, I +obtained a far distant view of the verge of the _Bottomless Gulf_, a +sight exceedingly horrible; and also of a spectacle above, still more +appalling, namely _Justice_ upon his _supreme seat_, holding the keys of +Hell, at a separate and distinct tribunal over the chasm, to pronounce +judgment upon the damned as they came. I could see the prisoners cast +headlong down the gulf, and Pettifogger rushing to fling himself over the +terrific brink, rather than look once on the court of _Justice_. For oh! +there was there a spectacle too severe for a guilty countenance. I +merely gazed from _afar_, but I beheld more terrific horror, than I can +at present relate, or I could at that time support, for my spirit +struggled and fluttered at the awful sight, and wrestled so strenuously, +that it burst all the bands of Sleep, and my soul returned to its +accustomed functions. And exceedingly overjoyed I was to see myself +still amongst the living. I instantly determined upon reforming myself, +as a hundred years of affliction in the paths of righteousness, would be +less harrowing to me, than another glance on the horrors of this night. + + + +Death the Great. + + +Leave land and house we must some day, +For human sway not long doth bide; +Leave pleasures and festivities, +And pedigrees, our boast and pride. + +Leave strength and loveliness of mien, +Wit sharp and keen, experience dear; +Leave learning deep, and much lov'd friends, +And all that tends our life to cheer. + +From Death then is there no relief? +That ruthless thief and murderer fell, +Who to his shambles beareth down +All, all we own, and us as well. + +Ye monied men, ye who would fain +Your wealth retain eternally, +How brave 'twould be a sum to raise, +And the good grace of Death to buy! + +How brave! ye who with beauty beam, +On rank supreme who fix your mind, +Should ye your captivations muster, +And with their lustre king Death blind. + +O ye who are at foot most light, +Who are in the height now of your spring, +Fly, fly, and ye will make us gape, +If ye can scape Death's cruel fling. + +The song and dance afford, I ween, +Relief from spleen, and sorrows grave; +How very strange there is no dance, +Nor tune of France, from Death can save! + +Ye travellers of sea and land, +Who know each strand below the sky; +Declare if ye have seen a place, +Where Adam's race can Death defy! + +Ye scholars, and ye lawyer crowds, +Who are as gods reputed wise; +Can ye from all the lore ye know, +'Gainst Death bestow some good advice? + +The world, the flesh, and Devil, compose +The direst foes of mortals poor; +But take good heed of Death the Great, +From the Lost Gate, Destruction o'er. + +'Tis not worth while of Death to prate, +Of his Lost Gate and courts so wide; +But O reflect! it much imports, +Of the two courts in which ye're tried. + +It here can little signify +If the street high we cross, or low; +Each lofty thought doth rise, be sure, +The soul to lure to deepest woe. + +But by the wall that's ne'er re-pass'd, +To gripe thee fast when Death prepares, +Heed, heed thy steps, for thou mayst mourn +The slightest turn for endless years. + +When opes the door, and swiftly hence +To its residence eternal flies +The soul, it matters much, which side +Of the gulf wide its journey lies. + +Deep penitence, amended life, +A bosom rife of zeal and faith, +Can help to man alone impart, +Against the smart and sting of Death. + +These things to thee seem worthless now, +But not so low will they appear +When thou art come, O thoughtless friend! +Just to the end of thy career. + +Thou'lt deem, when thou hast done with earth, +These things of worth unspeakable, +Beside the gulf so black and drear, +The gulf of Fear, 'twixt Heaven and Hell. + + + + +A Vision of Hell. + + +One fair morning of genial April, when the earth was green and pregnant, +and Britain, like a paradise, was wearing splendid liveries, tokens of +the smile of the summer sun, I was walking upon the bank of the Severn, +in the midst of the sweet notes of the little songsters of the wood, who +appeared to be striving to break through all the measures of music, +whilst pouring forth praise to the Creator. I too occasionally raised my +voice, and warbled with the feathered choir, though in a manner somewhat +more restrained than that in which they sang; and occasionally read a +portion of the book of the Practice of Godliness. Nevertheless, my +former visions would not depart from my remembrance, but continually +troubled me by coming across all other thoughts. And they persisted in +doing so, until, by arguing the matter minutely with myself, I reflected +that there is no vision but what comes from above, to warn one to be upon +one's guard, and that consequently it was my duty to write mine down, +that they might serve as a warning to others also. I therefore returned +to my home, and whilst overwhelmed with melancholy, I was endeavouring to +collect some of my frightful reminiscences, I happened to give a yawn +over my paper, and this gave master Sleep an opportunity to glide upon +the top of me. Scarcely had Sleep closed my senses, when, behold! a +glorious apparition came towards me, in the shape of a young man, tall +and exceedingly beautiful; his garments were seven times more white than +snow, his countenance was so lustrous that it rendered the very sun +obscure, and his curling locks of gold parted in two lovely wreaths upon +his head, in the form of a crown. "Come with me, mortal man," said he on +coming up. "Who art thou, my lord?" said I. "I am," he replied, "the +angel of the countries of the North, the guardian of Britain and its +queen. I am one of the princes who are stationed beneath the throne of +the Lamb, who receive commands for the protection of the gospel, against +all its enemies in Hell and in Rome, in France and Constantinople, in +Africa and in India, and wheresoever else they are devising artifices for +its destruction. I am the angel who conducted thee below to castle +Belial, and who showed thee the vanity and madness of the whole world, +the city of Destruction, and the excellence of the city of Emmanuel, and +I am come once more by his command, to show thee other things, because +thou art seeking to turn to account what thou hast seen already." "How, +my lord," said I, "will your illustrious majesty, which superintends +kings and kingdoms, condescend to associate with such a poor worm as +myself?" "O," said he, "we respect more the virtue of a beggar than the +grandeur of a sovereign. What if I be greater than the kings of the +earth, and higher than many of the countless potentates of heaven? As my +wonderful master deigned to humble himself so inexpressibly as to wear +one of your bodies, and to live among you, and to die for your salvation, +how should I presume to be dissatisfied with my duty in serving you, and +the vilest of the human race, since ye are so high in favour with my +master? Come out, spirit, and free thyself from thy clay," said he, with +his eyes directed upwards. And with that word, I could feel myself +becoming extricated from every part of my body. No sooner was I free, +than he snatched me up to the firmament of heaven, through the region of +lightning and thunder, and all the glowing armories of the sky, +innumerable degrees higher than I had been with him before, whence I +could scarcely descry the earth, which looked no wider than a croft. +After permitting me to rest a short space, he again lifted me up a +million of miles, until I could see the sun far below us; we rushed +through the milky way and past the Pleiades, and many other exceedingly +large stars, till we caught a distant view of other worlds. At length, +by dint of journeying, we reached the confines of the awful eternity, and +were in sight of the two palaces of the mighty king Death, which stand +one on the right hand and the other on the left, and are at a great +distance from each other, as there is an immense void between them. I +enquired whether we should go to see the right hand palace, because it +did not appear to me to resemble the other which I had seen before. "You +will probably see," he replied, "sometime, still more of the difference +which is between the one palace and the other; but at present it is +necessary for us to sail another course." Whereupon we turned away from +the little world, and having arrived over the intervening gap, we let +ourselves down to the country of Eternity, between the two palaces, into +the horrible void; an enormous country it was, exceedingly deep and +dark--without order and without inhabitants--now hot, now cold--sometimes +silent, sometimes noisy, with the sound caused by cataracts of water +tumbling upon the flames and extinguishing them; which cataracts, +however, did not long continue, for presently might be seen a puff of +fire bursting out and consuming the water. There was here no course, nor +whole, nothing living, nothing shapely; but a giddy discord and an +amazing darkness which would have blinded me for ever, if my companion +had not again displayed his heavenly garment of splendour. By the light +which it cast I could see the country of Oblivion, and the edges of the +wilds of Destruction in front, on the left hand; and on the right the +lowest skirts apparently of the walls of Glory. "Behold the great gulf +between Abraham and Dives," said my guide, "which is termed the place of +Chaos. It is the region of the elements which God created first; it is +the place wherein are the seeds of every living thing, from which the +Almighty word made your world and all that therein is--water, fire, air, +earth, animals, fishes and creeping things, winged birds, and human +bodies, but not your souls, for they are of an origin and generation +higher and more exalted." Through the vast, frightful place of Chaos we +at length broke out to the left hand, and before travelling any distance +there, where every thing was ever becoming more frightful, I could feel +my heart at the top of my throat, and my hair standing like the prickles +of the hedge-hog, even before seeing any thing; but when I _did_ see--oh! +spectacle too much for tongue to relate, or for the spirit of man to +behold. I fainted. Oh, the amazing and monstrous abyss, opening in a +horrible manner into the other world! Oh, the continual crackling of the +terrible flames, darting over the sides of the accursed precipice, and +the flashes of linked lightning rending the black, thick smoke, which the +unsightly orifice was casting up! My dear companion, having brought me +to myself again, gave me some spiritual water to drink; O how excellent +it was in its taste and color! After drinking of the heavenly water, I +could feel a wonderful strength diffusing itself through me, bringing +with it sense, heart, faith, and various other heavenly virtues. By this +time I had approached with him unterrified to the edge of the steep, +enveloped in the veil, the flames parting on both sides and avoiding us, +not daring to come in contact with the inhabitants of the supreme abodes. +Then from the summit of the terrific precipice we darted down, like two +stars falling from the firmament of heaven, a thousand million of miles, +over many a brimstone crag, and many a furious, ugly cataract and glowing +precipice, every thing that we passed looking always frowningly downward; +yet every thing noxious avoided us, except once, when having thrust my +nose out of the veil, I was struck by such a suffocating, strangling +exhalation as would have put an end to me, if my guide had not instantly +assisted me with the water of life. By the time that I had recovered, I +perceived that we had arrived at a kind of standing place; for in all +this loathsome chasm it was impossible to obtain any rest before, owing +to the steepness and slipperiness of its sides. There my guide permitted +me to take some further rest; and during this respite, it happened that +the thunders and the hoarse whirlwinds became silent for a little while, +and in spite of the din of the raging cataracts, I heard from afar a +sound louder than the whole--a sound of horrible harsh voices, of +shouting, bellowing, and strong groans, swearing, cursing, and +blaspheming, till I would have consented to part with mine ears, that I +might not hear. Ere we moved a foot farther, we could hear a terrible +tumbling sound, and if we had not suddenly slipped aside, hundreds of +unfortunate men would have fallen upon us, who were coming headlong, in +excessive hurry, to take possession of their bad purchase, with a host of +devils driving them. "O, sir," said one devil, "take it easy, lest you +should ruffle your curling locks. Madam, do you wish for an easy +cushion? I am afraid that you will be out of all order by the time you +come to your couch," said he to another. + +The strangers were exceedingly averse to going forward, insisting that +they were out of their road; but notwithstanding all they could say, go +they did, and we behind them, to a black flood of great magnitude, and +through it they went, and we across it, my companion holding the +celestial water continually to my nostrils, to strengthen me against the +stench of the river, and against the time when I should see some of the +inhabitants of the place, for hitherto I had not beheld so much as one +devil, though I had heard the voices of many. "Pray, my lord," said I, +"what is the name of this putrid river?" "The river of the Fiend," said +he, "in which all his subjects are bathed, in order that they may be +rendered fit for the country. For this accursed water changes their +countenance, and washes away from them every relic of goodness, every +semblance of hope and of comfort." And, indeed, on gazing upon the host +after it had come through, I could distinguish no difference in deformity +between the devils and the damned. Some of the latter would fain have +sculked at the bottom of the river, and have lain there to all eternity, +in a state of strangulation, lest they should get a worse bed father on; +but here the proverb was verified, that "he must needs run whom the Devil +drives," for with the devils behind, the damned were compelled to go +forward unto the beach, to their eternal damnation; where I at the first +glance saw more pains and torments than the heart of man can imagine or +the tongue relate; a single one of which was sufficient to make the hair +stand erect, the blood to freeze, the flesh to melt, the bones to drop +from their places--yea, the spirit to faint. What is empaling or sawing +men alive, tearing off the flesh piecemeal with iron pincers, or broiling +the flesh with candles, collop fashion, or squeezing heads flat in a +vice, and all the most shocking devices which ever were upon earth, +compared with one of these? Mere pastime! Here were a hundred thousand +shoutings, hoarse sighs, and strong groans; yonder a boisterous wailing +and horrible outcry answering them, and the howling of a dog is sweet, +delicious music, when compared with these sounds. When we had proceeded +a little way onward from the accursed beach, towards the wild place of +Damnation, I perceived, by their own light, innumerable men and women +here and there; and devils without number and without rest, incessantly +employing their strength in tormenting. Yes, there they were, devils and +damned, the devils roaring with their own torments, and making the damned +roar, by means of the torments which they inflicted upon them. I paid +particular observation to the corner which was nearest me. There I +beheld the devils with pitch-forks, tossing the damned up into the air, +that they might fall headlong on poisoned hatchels or barbed pikes, there +to wriggle their bowels out. After a time the wretches would crawl in +multitudes, one upon another, to the top of one of the burning crags, +there to be broiled like mutton; from there they would be snatched afar, +to the top of one of the mountains of eternal frost and snow, where they +would be allowed to shiver for a time; thence they would be precipitated +into a loathsome pool of boiling brimstone, to wallow there in +conflagration, smoke, and the suffocation of horrible stench; from the +pool they would be driven to the marsh of Hell that they might embrace +and be embraced by its reptiles many times worse than serpents and +vipers; after allowing them half an hour's dalliance with these +creatures, the devils would seize a bundle of rods of steel, fiery hot +from the furnace, and would scourge them till their howlings, caused by +the horrible inexpressible pain which they endured, would fill the vast +abode of darkness, and when the fiends deemed that they had scourged them +enough, they would take hot irons and sear their bloody wounds. + +There was here no fainting, nor swooning to evade a moment of suffering, +but a continual strength to suffer and to feel, though you would have +imagined after one horrible cry, that it would be utterly impossible +there should be strength remaining to give another cry so frightfully +loud; the damned never lowered their key, and the devils kept replying, +"behold your welcome for ever and ever." And it almost seemed that the +sauciness and bitterness of the devils, in jeering and mocking their +victims, were worse to bear than the pain itself. What was worst of all, +their conscience was at present utterly aroused, and was tearing them +worse than a thousand of the infernal lions. We proceeded farther and +farther downward, and the farther we proceeded, the more horrible was the +work which was going on; the first place we came to in our progress was a +frightful prison, in which were many human beings under the scourge of +the devils, shrieking most shockingly. "What place is this?" said I. +"That," said the angel, "is the couch of those who cry 'woe is me that I +did not--!' Hark to them for a moment!" "Woe is me that I did not +purify myself in time from every kind of sin!" says one. "Woe is me that +I did not believe and repent before coming here!" says the other. + +Next to the cell of too late repentance, and of debate after judgment had +been passed, was the prison of the procrastinators, who would be every +time promising amendment, without ever fulfilling their promise. "When +this business is over," says one, "I will turn over another leaf." "When +this obstacle is removed, I will become a new man yet," says the other. +But when the obstacle is removed, they are not a bit the nearer to +reformation, for some other obstacle is always found to prevent them from +moving towards the gate of Righteousness, and if they do sometimes move a +little, they are sure to turn back. Next to this was the prison of vain +confidence, full of those who, on being commanded to abstain from their +luxuriousness, drunkenness, or avarice, would say, "God is merciful, and +better than his word, and will not damn his creature for ever for so +small a matter." But here they were yelping forth blasphemy, and asking +where is that mercy, which was boasted to be immeasurable. "Peace, hell- +dogs," at length said a great lobster of a devil who was hearing them, +"peace! would you have mercy without doing any thing to obtain it? Would +you have the Truth render his word false, for the sake of obtaining the +company of such filthy dross as you? Too much mercy has been shown to +you already. You were given a Saviour, a comforter, and the apostles, +with books, sermons, and good examples, and will you never cease to +deafen us with bawling about mercy, where mercy has never been?" On +going out from this fiery gulf, I could hear one puffing and shouting +terribly, "I knew no better, nothing was ever expended in teaching me my +duty, and I could never find time to read or pray, because I was obliged +to earn bread for myself and my poor family." "Aye," said a little +crooked devil who stood by, "and did you never find time to tell pleasant +stories?--no leisure for self vaunting during long winter evenings when I +was in the chimney corner? Now, why did you not devote some of that time +to learning to read and pray? Who on Sundays used to come with me to the +tavern, instead of going with the parson to church? Who devoted many a +Sunday afternoon to vain prating about worldly things, or to sleep, +instead of meditation and prayer? And have ye merely acted according to +your knowledge and your opportunities? Peace, sirrah, with your lying +nonsense!" "O thou blood of a mad dog!" said the lost man, "it is not +long since you were whispering something very different into my ear, if +you had said that the other day, I should scarcely have come here." "O," +said the devil, "we do not mind telling you the bitter truth here, since +we need not fear that you will go back to tell tales." + +Below this cell I saw a kind of vast pit, and in it what looked like an +infinite quantity of loathsome ordure, burning with a green flame, and on +drawing near, I was aware, from the horrid howling that proceeded from +it, that it was composed of men piled one upon another, the horrible +flames crackling meanwhile through them. "This hollow," said the angel, +"is the couch of those who say after committing some great sin, 'pooh! I +am not the first, I have plenty of companions;' and thus you see, they +_do_ get plenty of companions, to verify their words and to increase +their agony." Opposite to this horrible place was a large cellar, where +I could see men twisted, as tow is twisted, or hemp is spun. "Pray," +said I "who are these?" "Panegyrists," said he, "and out of sheer +mockery to them, the devils are trying whether it is possible to twist +them as flexibly as they twisted their own discourse." A little way +below that cell, I could but just descry a sort of prison-pool, very +dark, and in it things which had been men, having faces like the heads of +wolf-dogs, and up to their jaws in bog, barking blasphemy and lies most +furiously, as long as they could get their sting above the mud. At this +moment a troop of devils happening to pass by, some of these creatures +contrived to bite in the heels, ten or twelve of the devils who had +brought them thither. "Woe and destruction to you hell-dogs!" said one +of the devils who had been bit, "you shall pay for this;" and forthwith +commenced beating the bog, till the wretches were drowned in the stinking +abysses. "Who," he then added, "have deserved hell better than you, who +have been hunting up and devising gossip, and buzzing lies about from +house to house, in order that you might laugh, after having set a whole +country at loggerheads. What more could one of ourselves have done?" +"That," said the angel, "is the bed of the tale-bearers, the slanderers, +and the whisperers, and of all other envious curs, who are continually +wounding people behind their backs with their hands or their tongues." + +From here we passed to a vast dungeon, by far the filthiest that I had +seen yet, and the most replete with toads, adders, and stench. "This," +said my guide, "is the place of the men who expect to get to heaven +because they have no ill intentions, that is, for being neither good nor +bad." Next to this pool of ill savour, I beheld a place where a vast +crowd were sitting, and without any thing visible to torment them, +groaning more piteously than any that I had hitherto heard in Hell. +"Mercy upon us," said I, "what causes these people to complain more than +the rest, when they have neither torture nor devil near them?" "O," said +the angel, "the less torment they have without, the more they have +within. These are refractory heretics, atheists, antichristians, worldly- +wise ones, abjurers of the faith, persecutors of the church, and an +infinity of such like wretches, who are abandoned entirely to the +punishment of conscience, more tormenting than flame or devil, which +domineers over them ceaselessly and without restraint. 'I will never +permit myself any more,' says she, 'to be drowned in ale, nor to be +blinded by bribes, nor deafened by music and company, nor lulled nor +confounded by careless listlessness; for now I _will_ be listened to, and +never shall the clack of the hated truth cease in your ears.' Longing is +ever raging within the wretch for the happiness which he has lost; memory +is ever reproaching him by saying how easy it was to be obtained, and the +understanding showing him the magnitude of his loss, and the certainty +that nothing is now to be obtained, but indescribable gnawing for ever +and ever. So with these three instruments--namely longing, memory, and +understanding--conscience is tearing the lost one, in a manner far worse +than all the devils in Hell could tear him with their claws." + +On coming out of this wonderful nook I heard a confused talking, and +after every word such a ghastly laughter, as if five hundred devils were +casting their horns with laughing. On approaching to see the cause of +such a rarity as laughter in Hell, I discovered that it was only got up +to incense two honorable gentlemen, newly arrived, who were insisting on +being shown respect suitable to their gentility. One of them was a round +bodied squire, having with him a big roll of parchment--namely his map of +pedigree--out of which he recited from which of the fifty tribes of North +Wales he was sprung, and how many justices of the peace, and how many +sheriffs his house had produced. "Come, come," said one of the devils, +"we know the merits of the greater part of your ancestry. If you had +been like your father or your great grandfather, we should not have +ventured to come in contact with you; but you are only the heir of the +pit of darkness, you dirty hell-dog! You are scarcely worthy of a +night's lodging," added he, "and yet we'll grant you some nook, wherein +to await the dawn;" and with that word the goblin with his pitchfork, +gave him more than thirty tosses in the fiery air, until he at length +cast him into an abyss out of sight. "That may do," said the other, "for +a squire of half blood, but I hope you will behave better to a knight, +who has had the honor of serving the king in person, and can name twelve +earls and fifty baronets belonging to his ancient house." "If your +ancestors and your ancient house be all that you can bring in your +defence, you may go the same road as he," said one of the devils, +"because we can scarcely remember one ancient house, of which some +oppressor, murderer, or strong thief did not lay the foundation, and +which he did not transmit to people as froward as himself, or to lazy +drones, or drunken swine, to maintain whose extravagant magnificence, the +vassals and the tenantry must be squeezed to death, whilst every handsome +colt or pretty cow in the neighbourhood must be parted with for the +pleasure of the mistress, and every lass or married woman, may consider +herself fortunate, if she escape the pleasure of the master; the +freeholders, meanwhile, being either obliged to follow him like fawning +hounds, rob themselves for his benefit, and sell their patrimonies at his +pleasure, or be subject to frowns and hatred, and be dragged into every +disagreeable and vexatious employment during their lives. + +"O these little great country folks," continued the devil, "how genteely +they swear in order to obtain credit with their mistresses, or with the +shop-keepers; and when they have decked themselves out, O how insolently +they look upon many of the middling officers of the church and state, and +how much worse on the common people! as if they were a species of +reptiles in comparison with themselves. Woe is me! is not all blood of +the same color? Did you not come all into the world by the same way?" +"But, nevertheless, with your permission," said the knight, "there are +some who are of much purer birth than others." "Destruction take you!" +said the goblin, "there is not one carcass of you all better than the +rest; you are all polluted with radical sin from Adam. But, sir," said +he, "if your blood be better than other blood, less scum will exude from +you when boiling; however, in order to be sure of its quality, it will be +as well to search you with fire as well as water." Thereupon a devil in +the shape of a chariot of fire received him, and the other in mockery +lifted him into it, and away he was hurried like lightning. After a +short time the angel caused me to look, and I could see the wretched +knight suffering a terrible steeping in a frightful boiling furnace, in +company with Cain, Nimrod, Esau, Tarquin, Nero, Caligula, and the others +who were the founders of genealogies, and were the first to set up arms +of nobility. + +A little farther on, my guide caused me to look through the hollow of a +rock, and there I beheld a number of coquettes briskly at work, doing and +repeating all their former follies upon earth. Some were twisting their +mouths, some were pulling their front locks with irons, some were +painting themselves, some patching their faces with sooty ointments, to +make the yellow look more fair; some quite mad at seeing their visages, +after all their pains in coloring and variegating, more hideous than +those of the very devils, were endeavouring to break the mirrors, or were +tearing off with their nails and their teeth the whole artificial +blush--the ointments, skin, and flesh coming off all together. The cries +which they uttered occasionally were most dismal. "The curse of curses," +would one say, "on my father, for making me marry when a girl, an old +sapless stump, whose work in raising desires which he could not gratify +has driven me hither." "A thousand curses on my parents," would another +say, "for sending me to a cloister to learn chastity; they would not have +done worse in sending me to a roundhead to learn generosity, or to a +quaker to learn manners, than to a papist to learn honor." "Destruction," +said another, "seize my mother for her avaricious pride in preventing my +obtaining a husband when I wanted one, and thus obliging me to purloin +the thing I might have honorably come by." "Hell, and double Hell to the +lustful wretch of a gentleman, who first began tempting me," would the +third say; "if he had not, betwixt fair and foul, broken the hedge, I had +not become a cell open to every body, nor had I come to this cell of +devils!" And then they fell to tearing themselves again. + +I was glad to quit such a pack of female dogs. But before I had passed +on many steps, I was surprised to see another shoal of imprisoned +wenches, twice more detestable than they. Some had been changed into +toads, some into dragons, some into serpents who were swimming and +hissing, glavering and butting in a fetid, stagnant pool, much larger +than Llyn Tegid. {84} "In the name of wonder," said I, "what sort of +creatures may these be?" "There are here," said he, "four sorts of +wenches, all notoriously bad. First, there are procuresses, with some of +the principal lasses of their respective bevies about them. Second, +gossiping ladies with a swarm of their news-bearing hags. Third, +bouncing madams, and a pack of sneaking curs on both sides of them, for +no man, but for downright fear of them, would ever go nigh them. Fourth, +scolds, become a hundred times more horrible than vipers, with their +poisonous stings going creak, creak to all eternity." + +"I had imagined that Lucifer had been a king of too much courtesy, to put +a gentlewoman of my rank with such little petty she-devils as these," +said one, something like a winged serpent, only that she was much more +fierce. "O that he would send here, seven hundred of the worst devils in +Hell in exchange for thee, thou poisonous hell-spawn!" said another ugly +viper. "O! many thanks to you," said a gigantic devil who overheard +them, "we set too much value on our place and merits, to condescend to +become mates of yours; and though we are willing to admit that you are +fully as competent to torment people as the best of us, we would, +nevertheless, not yield up our duties to you." "And yet," said the angel +softly, "Lucifer has another reason for keeping such a particular watch +over these; he knows well, that if they should break out, they would turn +all Hell topsy-turvy." From here we went, still going downward, to a +place where I beheld a frightful den, in which was a horrible clamour, +the like of which I had never heard, for swearing, cursing, blaspheming, +snarling, groaning, and crying. "Who is here?" said I. "This," said he, +"is the den of the thieves. Here is a swarm of game-keepers, lawyers, +stewards, and the old Judas in the midst of them; they have been +excessively annoyed at seeing the tailors and weavers above them, in a +more comfortable chamber." Almost before I could turn myself, there came +a horse of a devil, bearing a physician and an apothecary, whom he cast +down amongst the pedlars and the duffers, for selling bad, rotten ware; +but they beginning to fume at being placed in such low company, one of +the devils said, "stay, stay! you _do_ deserve a different place," and +cast them down amongst the conquerors and the murderers. There was a +multitude shut up here, for playing with false dice and concealing cards; +but before I could observe much, I heard, close by the door, a terrible +rush and rustle, with a hie! hie! get on! ho! yo! hip! I turned to see +what it was; but perceiving nothing but horned goblins, I enquired of my +guide whether there were cuckolds amongst the devils? "No," said he, +"they are in a particular cell. These are drovers who would fain escape +to the place of the Sabbath-breakers, and are driven hither against their +will." At that word, I looked, and perceived their polls full of the +horns of sheep and cattle, and those who drove them, casting them down +beneath the feet of the bloodiest robbers. "Crouch there," said one; +"though you feared so much of old the thieves on London road, you were +yourselves the very worst species of highwaymen, living upon the road and +plundering, yes, and murdering poor families. O how many poor creatures +did you not keep, with their hungry mouths open, in vain expectation of +the money for the sale of the beasts, which they had intrusted to you; +and you in the mean time in Ireland, or in the King's Bench laughing at +them, or upon the road in the midst of your wine and harlots." + +On quitting this den of furious heat, I got a sight of a lair, exceeding +all the rest I had seen in Hell, but one, in frightful stinking +filthiness, where was a herd of accursed drunken swine, disgorging and +swallowing, swallowing and disgorging, continually and without rest, the +most loathsome snivel. The next pit was the couch of gluttony, where +Dives and his companions were upon their bellies, eating dirt and fire +alternately, without any liquid ever. A cave or two lower there was an +exceedingly spacious kitchen, in which some were in a state of roasting +and boiling, others frying and burning in an oven half heated. "Behold +the place of the merciless and the unfeeling," said the angel. I then +turned a little to the left hand, where there was a cell more light than +any one which I had yet seen in Hell, and enquired what place it was? +"The abode of the infernal dragons," replied the angel, "who are hissing +and snarling, rushing and preying upon one another every minute." I +approached; and oh! the look which cannot be described was upon them, the +whole light was but the living fire in their eyes. "These are the seed +of Adam," said my guide, "morose wretches, and furious savage men; but, +yonder," said he, "are some of the old seed of the great dragon Lucifer;" +and verily, I could perceive not a whit more amiability in the one sort +than in the other. In the next cellar were the misers, in a state of +horrible agony with their hearts cleaving to coffers of burning treasure, +the rust whereof was ceaselessly cankering them, because those hearts had +been ceaselessly bent upon getting money--O the consuming torment, worse +than frenzy, that was now going on within them, with care and repentance. +Below this there was a hanging ledge, where there were some apothecaries +ground to dust, and stuffed into earthen pots amongst album grecum, dung +of geese and swine, and many an old stinking ointment. + +We were now journeying forward, continually descending, along the +wilderness of Destruction, through innumerable torments, eternal and not +to be described--from cell to cell, from cellar to cellar, and the last +always surpassing the others in horror and ghastliness; at last we +arrived at a vast porch, more cheerless than any thing we had seen +before. It was a very spacious porch, and the pathway through it, which +was frightfully steep, led to a kind of dusky nook of incredible ugliness +and horror, and there the palace was. At the upper end of the accursed +court, among thousands of horrible objects, I could, by means of the +radiance of my heavenly companion, perceive amidst the dreary darkness +two feet of enormous magnitude, reaching to the roof of the whole +infernal firmament. I enquired of my conductor what this horrible thing +might be? "Patience," said he, "you shall obtain a more ample view of +this monster as you return; but move forward now to see the royal +palace." + +Whilst we were proceeding down the porch of Horror, we heard a noise +behind us, as of an immense number of people. Having turned aside to let +them pass forward, we beheld four distinct bands, and soon discovered +that the four princesses of the city of Destruction, were bringing their +subjects as presents to their father. I recognised the princess Pride, +not only by her being before the others, but also by her habit of +stumbling every moment, for want of looking beneath her feet. She had +with her a vast many kings, potentates, courtiers, gentlemen, and pompous +people, many quakers, innumerable females of every rank and degree. + +The princess Lucre was next, with her silly, mean figure, bringing along +with her very many of the money loving race--such as usurers, lawyers, +extortioners, overseers, game-keepers, harlots, and some ecclesiastics +also. Next to these was the amiable princess Pleasure and her daughter +Folly, conducting their subjects--consisting of players at dice, cards, +draughts, games of legerdemain, and of poets, musicians, tellers of old +stories, drunkards, ladies of pleasure, debauches, pretty fellows, with a +thousand million of all kinds of baubles, to serve now as instruments of +punishment for the lost fools. After these three had gone with their +prisoners to the palace, to receive their judgment--behold Hypocrisy, the +last of all, conducting a more numerous rout than any of the others, of +all nations and ages, of town and country, gentle and simple, males and +females. At the tail of the two-faced multitudes we advanced till we +came in sight of the palace, through many dragons and horned sprites, and +warriors of Hell, the black wardens of the gloomy pandemonium, I all the +time crouching very carefully within my veil. We entered the frightful +and awful edifice, every corner of which abounded with horror. The walls +were immense rocks of glowing adamant, the pavement of an insufferably +sharp flint, the roof of burning steel, meeting like an arch of greenish- +blue and dusky-red flames, and in its size and its heat, resembling an +immense vaulted baking oven. + +Opposite to the door, on a flaming throne, the Arch-Fiend was seated, his +principal lost angels on both sides of him, on thrones of fire terrible +to behold--sitting according to their former rank in the regions of +light, when they were amiable messengers. It would only be in vain to +endeavour to relate how obscene and horrible they were; and the longer I +looked at any one of them, seven times more hideous he appeared. In the +midst, above the head of Lucifer, was a vast fist, holding a very +frightful bolt. The princesses, after making their obeisance, returned +to the world to their charges, without making any stay. As soon as they +had departed, a gigantic, wide-mouthed devil, by command of the king, +uttered a shout louder than a hundred discharges of artillery, as loud if +possible as the last trumpet, for the purpose of summoning the infernal +parliament. And lo! the rabble of Hell instantly filled the palace and +the porch in every shape, after the image and similitude of the principal +sin, which each delighted to thrust upon mankind. After commanding +silence, Lucifer, with his look directed to the potentates nearest to +him, began to speak, very graciously, in the following manner:-- + +"Ye potentates of Hell! princes of the black abodes of Despair! Though +by our confederacy we have lost possession of those thrones, from which +we once shone resplendent through the higher regions; our confederacy +was, nevertheless, a glorious one, as we aimed at nothing less than the +whole. And we have not lost the whole either; for lo! the extensive and +profound regions, to the extremest wilds of vast Destruction, are yet +beneath our sway. It is true we reign in horrible agony; but spirits of +our eminence prefer ruling in torment to serving in ease. And besides +this, we are on the eve of obtaining another world, more than three parts +of the earth having been beneath my banner for a long time. + +"And although the Almighty Enemy, sent his own son to die for the beings +of that world; yet I, by my baubles, obtain ten souls, for every one +which he obtains by his crucified son. And although I have not been able +to reach him, who sits in the high places and discharges the invincible +thunderbolts, yet revenge of some kind is sweet. Let us complete the +destruction of the remnant of human beings, still in the favour of our +destroyer. I remember the time, when you caused them to be burnt by +multitudes and cities, and even the whole race of the earth, by means of +the flood, to be swept down to us in the fire. But at present, though +your strength and your natural cruelty are not a whit diminished, yet you +are become in some degree inactive; if that had not been the case, we +might long since have destroyed the few who are godly, and have caused +the earth to be united with this our vast empire. But know, ye black +ministers of my displeasure, that unless ye be more resolute and more +diligent, and make the most of the short time which yet remains to you +for doing evil, ye shall experience the weight of my anger, in torments +new and strange to the oldest of you. This I swear by the deepest Hell, +and the vast, eternal pit of Darkness." And, thereupon, he frowned, till +the palace became seven times more gloomy than before. + +Moloch now arose, one of the infernal potentates, and after making his +obeisance to the king, he said, "O emperor of the Air! mighty ruler of +Darkness! no one ever doubted my propensity to malice and cruelty; the +sufferings of others have been, and still are, my supreme delight. It is +as capital sport to me, to hear the shrieks of infants perishing in the +fire as of old, when thousands of sucklings were sacrificed to me outside +of Jerusalem. When was I ever slack at my work? Since the return of the +crucified Enemy to the supreme abodes, I have employed myself in slaying +and burning his subjects. I did all I could, to destroy the Christians +from the face of the earth, during the reigns of ten emperors; and many +an awful butchery I have made of them in modern times, both in Paris and +England, to say nothing of other places: but what are we the nearer to +our object for all this? The One above has caused the tree to grow, +after its branches have been severed; and all our efforts, are nothing +better than showing one's teeth, without the power of biting." "Pshaw!" +said Lucifer, "a fig for such heartless legions as ye. I will no longer +rely upon you! I will do the work myself, and the glory thereof I will +share with no one. I will go to the earth in my own kingly person, and +will swallow up the whole; not one man, henceforth, shall be found on the +earth to adore the Almighty." Thereupon he gave a furious bound, +attempting to set off, in a firmament of living fire; but, behold! the +fist above his head shook the terrific bolt till he trembled in the midst +of his frenzy, and before he could move far, an invisible hand lugged the +old fox back by his chain, in spite of his teeth. Whereupon he became +seven times more frantic; his eyes were more terrible than lightnings, +black thick smoke burst from his nostrils, and dark green flames from his +mouth and entrails: he gnawed his chain in his agony, and hissed forth +direful blasphemy, and the most frightful curses. + +But perceiving how vain it was to seek to break loose, or to struggle +with the Almighty, he returned to his place and proceeded with his +discourse somewhat more calmly, but with ten times more malice. "The +Omnipotent Thunderer has vanquished me, and he alone could have done so. +To him I submit. Against him all my fury is in vain; I will, therefore, +direct it against nearer and lower objects, and pour it in showers upon +those who are yet under my banner, and within the reach of my chain. +Arise, ye ministers of Destruction! rulers of the unquenchable fire! and +as my wrath and my venom flow forth and my malice boileth out, do ye +assiduously spread the whole tide amongst the damned, particularly the +Christians. Urge the instruments of torture to the utmost--devise as +many more as you can--double the fire and the boiling, until the very +cauldrons be overturned; and when they are in the most extreme, +inexpressible torture, mock, deride, and upbraid them; and when your +whole stock of ironry and bitterness is expended, hasten to me, and you +shall obtain more." + +There had been for some time a comparative silence in Hell, and the more +cruel tortures had been suspended; but now the stillness which Lucifer +had caused was broken, when the ghastly butchers rushed like wild hungry +bears upon their prisoners. O then there arose an oh! oh! oh! a wail, +and universal howling, more loud than the sound of cataracts, or the +tumult of an earthquake, so that Hell became seven times more frightful. +I should have swooned if my dear companion had not rendered me +assistance. "Take now," said he, "plenty of the water, that you may +obtain strength to see things yet more horrible than these." But +scarcely had these words proceeded from his mouth, when, lo! the +celestial Justice, who sits above the precipice keeping the gate of Hell, +came scourging three men with a rod of fiery scorpions. "Ha! ha!" said +Lucifer, "here are three right reverend gentlemen, whom Justice himself +has deigned to conduct to my kingdom." "Oh! woe is me," said one of the +three, "who asked him to trouble himself?" "Be it known," said Justice, +with a glance which made the devils tremble till they knocked one against +another, "that it is the will of the Great Creator, that I should myself +bring these three accursed murderers to their home. Sirrah," said he to +one of the devils, "unbolt for me the prison of the murderers, where are +Cain and Nero, Bonner, Bradshaw, Ignatius, and innumerable others of a +similar description." "Alas, alas! we never killed any body," said one +of the prisoners. "No, because you did not get time and because you were +prevented," said Justice. When the den was opened, there came out such a +horrible puff of bloody flame, and such a yell as if a thousand dragons +were giving their last gasp in their death agony. Into this den Justice +hurled his prisoners; {93} and on his way back he breathed obliquely, +such a tempest of fiery whirlwinds upon the Arch-Fiend and all his +potentates, as he passed by them, that Lucifer, Beelzebub, Satan, Moloch, +Abaddon, Asmodeus, Dagon, Apollyon, Belphegor, Mephistophiles, and all +the other principal demons were whisked away, and tumbled headlong into a +kind of gulf, which was opening and closing in the midst of the palace, +and whose aspect was more horrible, and whose steam was more frightful +than the aspect and vapour of any gulf which I had previously seen. +Before I could enquire of the angel as to what it was, he said, "that is +a hole which leads to another vast world." "Pray," said I, "what is the +name of that world?" "It is called," said he, "Unknown, or extremest +Hell, the habitation of the devils, and the place to which they are at +present gone. The vast wilderness, over part of which you have come, is +called the country of Despair, a place intended for the lost until the +Day of Judgment, when it will fall into extremest, bottomless Hell, and +the two will become one. When that has happened one of ourselves will +come and close the gate of the whole region of horror upon the devils and +the damned, which gate shall never, to all eternity, be opened for them. +In the meantime, however, permission is given to the devils to come to +these cooler regions, in order to torment the lost souls. Yea, they +often obtain permission to go even into the air, and about the earth, to +tempt men to the destructive paths, which lead to this dismal prison, +from which there is no escape." In the midst of this history, and whilst +I was in great surprise at seeing the mouth of Unknown, so much +surpassing in horror the jaws of upper Hell, I could hear a prodigious +noise of arms, and loud discharges from one side, answered by what seemed +to be hoarse thunders from the other; the rocks of Death, meanwhile, +rebellowing the tumult. + +"That is the sound of war," said I. "Is there war then in Hell?" "There +is," said the angel; "and it is impossible that there should not be here +continual war." Whilst we were moving out, to see what was the matter, I +beheld the mouth of Unknown opening, and casting up thousands of candles, +burning with a frightful green flame. These were Lucifer and his +potentates, who had contrived to subdue the tempest. But when the Arch +Fiend heard the noise of war, he became more pale than Death, and began +to call and gather together bands of his old experienced soldiers to +quell the tumult. At this moment he stumbled against a little puppy of +an imp, who had escaped between the feet of the combatants. "What is the +matter?" said the king. "Such a matter as will endanger your crown, +unless you look to yourself," said the imp. Close behind him came +another fiendish courier, bawling hoarsely, "you are plotting disquiet +for others, look now to your own repose. Yonder are the Turks, the +Papists, and the bloody-handed Roundheads, in three bands, filling all +the plains of the dark abodes, committing terrible outrages, and turning +every thing topsy-turvy." "How came they out?" said the Arch Fiend, +looking worse than Demigorgon. "The Papists," said the messenger, "broke +out of their Purgatory, I do not know how; and then on account of an old +grudge, they went to attack the back gate of the Paradise of Mahomet, and +let all the Turks out of their prison; and afterwards, in the hubbub, the +seed of Cromwell found some means to break out of their cells." Then +Lucifer turned about and looked under his throne, where were all the lost +kings, and caused Cromwell to be kept close in his kennel; and likewise +all the emperors of the Turks, under watch and ward. He then hastened +with his legions along the black wilds of Darkness, each obtaining light +from the fire which was incessantly tormenting his body. Guided by the +horrid uproar, the fiends advanced courageously towards the combatants; +then silence was enjoined in the name of the king, and Lucifer enquired, +"what is the cause of this disturbance in my kingdom?" "Please, your +infernal majesty," said Mahomet, "a dispute arose between me and pope +Leo, as to whether my Koran or the creed of Rome, had rendered you most +service; and whilst we were at it, a pack of Roundheads broke their +prison and put in their oar; asserting that their league and covenant, +deserved more respect at your hands than either. Thus from disputing we +have come to blows, and from words to arms. But at present, as your +majesty has returned from Unknown, I will refer the matter to yourself." +"Stay, we shall not let you escape thus!" said pope Julius; and to it +again they went, tooth and nail, in the most furious manner, till the +strokes were like an earthquake. O you should have seen the three armies +of the damned, tearing one another to pieces over the expanse of the +burning plains; and each individual body that was rent to pieces, +becoming joined again serpent fashion. At last Lucifer caused his old +soldiers, the champions of Hell, to pull them from each other, and it was +no easy matter to do so. + +When the tumult was hushed, pope Clement began to speak. "O emperor of +Horrors! as no throne has ever performed more faithful and universal +service to the infernal crown, over a great part of the world, for eleven +hundred years, than the papal chair, I hope you will not suffer any one +to contend with us for your favour." "Well," said a Scott of Cromwell's +army, "though the Koran has done great service for eight hundred years, +and the superstition of the Pope for a much longer period, yet has the +covenant done more since it came out, than the other two have ever done. +Moreover it is notorious that, whilst the votaries of those two are every +day rapidly diminishing, the followers of the covenant are increasing in +numbers, over the whole face of the world, and particularly in the island +of your enemies Britain, whose capital, London, the most noble city under +the sun, abounds with them." "Pshaw, pshaw!" said Lucifer, "if I am +rightly informed, the covenant itself is under a cloud, and you are no +longer what you were. And now I have one thing to tell the whole of +you--which is, that, whatever ye may do in other kingdoms, I will not +permit you to trouble mine. Therefore rest peaceably, under penalty of +worse torments corporeal and spiritual." At those words many of the +devils dropped their tails between their hoofs, and all the damned +sneaked away to their holes, for fear of a change for the worse. + +After causing the whole of them to be locked up in their prisons, and the +careless wardens to be deprived of their office, for having permitted +them to break out, Lucifer and his counsellors returned to the palace, +and sat down again, according to their rank, upon their fiery thrones. +After silence had been called and the place cleared, a huge, +wry-shouldered devil, placed a back-load of fresh prisoners before the +bar. "Is this the road to Paradise," said one, (for they all pretended +not to know where they were.) "Or if this be Purgatory," said another, +"we have with us an authority, under the hand of the Pope, to go straight +to Paradise without tarrying any where a minute. Therefore show us the +way, or, by the Pope's toe, we will cause him to punish you." Ha! ha! +ha!--ho! ho! ho! said eight hundred devils; and Lucifer himself, parted +his jaws half a yard in a kind of bitter laugh. The others were +confounded at this; but one said, "well, if we have lost our way in the +darkness, we would pay any one who would guide us." "Ha! ha!" said +Lucifer, "you will pay the last farthing before ye go." Thereupon each +fell to searching for his money, but found, to his sorrow, that he had +left his breeches behind him. Quoth the Arch Fiend, "you left Paradise +on the left hand, above the lofty mountains; and, notwithstanding, it was +so easy to come down here, it is next to impossible to go back, owing to +the nature of the country, through which the road back lies. For it is a +country abounding with mountains of burning iron, immense dismal crags, +sheets of eternal ice, and roaring, headlong cataracts; a country, in +short, far too difficult for you to travel, unless indeed you have talons +of the true devilish length. Come, come," said he to his myrmidons, +"take these blockheads to our paradise, to their companions." At this +moment I could hear the voice of some people who were coming, swearing +and cursing in a frightful manner. "O the Devil! the blood of the Devil! +a hundred thousand devils! a thousand million devils take me if I will go +farther!" but, nevertheless, they were cast slap down before the judge. +"Here you have," said the carrier, "a load of as good fire wood as the +best in Hell." "What are they?" said Lucifer. "Masters of the genteel +art of cursing and swearing," replied the devil; "men who understand the +language of Hell quite as well as ourselves." "You lie in your mouth, by +the Devil!" said one of them. "Sirrah! do you take my name in vain?" +said the Arch Fiend. "Quick! and hang them by their tongues to the +burning precipice yonder, and if they call for the Devil, be ready to +serve them; yea, if they call for a thousand, let them be satisfied." +When these were gone, lo! a giant of a devil vociferated to have the bar +cleared, and flung down a man whom he bore. "What have you brought +there?" said Lucifer. "A tavern-keeper," replied the other. "What," +said the king, "_one_ tavern-keeper! Why they are in the habit of coming +to the tune of five or six thousand. Have you not been out, sirrah, for +ten years, and yet you bring us but one? and he one who has done us much +more service in the world than yourself, you lazy, stinking dog!" "You +are too ready to condemn me, before listening to me," he replied. "This +fellow only was given to my charge, and, behold! I am clear of him. But +still I have sent to you from his house, many a worthless chap, after +guzzling down the maintenance of his family; many a dicer and +card-player; many a genteel swearer; many a pleasant, good kind of belly +god; and many a careless servant." "Well," said the Arch Fiend, "though +the tavern-keeper has merited to be amongst the flatterers below us, take +him at present to his brethren, in the cell of the liquid murderers; to +the thousands of apothecaries and poisoners, who are there for making +drink to kill their customers--boil him well for not having brewed better +ale." "With your permission," said the tavern-keeper shivering, "I have +deserved no such treatment. Must not every trade live?" "And could you +not live," said the Fiend, "without encouraging dissipation and gaming, +uncleanness, drunkenness, oaths, quarrels, slander and lies? and would +you, hell-hound, live at present better than ourselves! Pray what evil +have we here that you had not at home, the punishment solely excepted? +And having told you this bitter truth, I will add, that the infernal heat +and cold were not unknown to you either. + +"Did you not see sparks of our fire in the tongues of the swearers and of +the scolds, when seeking to get their husbands home? Was there not +plenty of the unquenchable fire in the mouth of the drunkard, and in the +eyes of the brawler? And could you not perceive something of the +infernal cold in the lovingness of the spendthrift, and in your own +civility to your customers, whilst any thing remained with them--in the +drollery of the buffoons, in the praise of the envious and the backbiter, +in the promises of the wanton, or in the shanks of the good companions +freezing beneath your tables? Art thou unacquainted with Hell, when the +house thou didst keep was Hell? Go, hell-dog, to thy punishment." + +At this moment appeared ten devils with their burdens, which they cast +upon the fiery floor, puffing terribly. "What have you there?" said +Lucifer. "We have brought," said one of the fiendish carriers, "five +things which were called kings the day before yesterday." (I looked +attentively and beheld in one of them old Louis of France.) "Fling them +here," said the king; whereupon they were flung to the other crowned +heads, under the feet of Lucifer. + +It was not long before I heard the sound of a brazen trumpet, and a +crying of room! room! room! After waiting a little time, what should be +coming but a drove of sessions folk, the devils carrying six lumps of +justices and a thousand of their fry--consisting of lawyers, attornies, +clerks, recorders, bailiffs, catchpoles, and pettifoggers of the courts. +I was surprised that none of them attempted to cross-question; but they +perceived that the matter was gone against them too far, and so, not one +of these learned disputers opened his mouth; only a pettifogger of the +courts said, that he would lay a plaint of false imprisonment against +Lucifer. "You shall now have cause enough to complain," said the Fiend, +"and yet never have an opportunity of seeing a court with your eyes." +Then, putting on his red cap, Lucifer, with an arrogant, insufferable +look, said, "take the justices to the dungeon of Pontius Pilate and Mr. +Bradshaw, who condemned king Charles. Parch the lawyers in company with +the murderers of Sir Edmund Bury Godfrey, {100} and their double-tongued +brethren, who dispute with one another, for no other purpose than to be +the ruin of any one who comes betwixt them. Let them greet that +provident lawyer--for they will find him here--who offered on his death +bed a thousand pounds for a clear conscience. Let them greet him, and +ask, whether he is now willing to give any thing more. Roast them with +their own parchment and papers; hang the pettifoggers above them, with +their nostrils downwards, in the roasting chimneys, to receive the smoke, +and to see whether they can get their belly-full of law. As for the +recorders, let them be cast among the forestallers, who detain the corn +or buy it up and mix it, and then sell the unsound for double the price +of the pure corn; just as the former demand double the fees for _wrong_, +which were formerly given for _right_. As for the catchpoles, leave them +at liberty to hunt vermin; or send them to the world, among the dingles +and brakes, to seize the debtors of the infernal crown--for what devil +among you will do the work better than they?" At this moment twenty +devils with packs on their shoulders, like Scotchmen, mounted before the +throne of Despair, and what had they got, on enquiry, but gipsies. "Ho!" +said Lucifer, "how did ye know the fortunes of others so well, without +knowing that your own fortune was leading ye to this prison." But the +gipsies said not a word in reply, being confounded at beholding faces +here more ugly than their own. "Hurl them into our deepest dungeon," +said Lucifer, to the fiends, "and don't starve them; we have here neither +cats nor rush-lights to give them, but let them have a toad between them, +every ten thousand years, provided they are quiet, and do not deafen us +with their gibberish and clibberty clabber." Next to these there came, I +should imagine, about thirty husbandmen. Every one was surprised to see +so many of them, people of their honest calling seldom coming to Hell; +but they were not from the same neighbourhood, nor for the same offences. +Some were for raising the markets; many for refusing to pay tithes, and +cheating the minister of his rights; others for leaving their work, to +follow gentry a hunting, and breaking their legs in endeavouring to leap +with them; some for working on Sundays; some for carrying their sheep and +cattle, in their heads to church, instead of musing on the Word; others +for roguish bargains. When Lucifer began to question them, oh! they were +all as pure as gold; none was aware of having committed any thing which +deserved such a lot. You will not believe what a crafty excuse every one +had to conceal his fault, notwithstanding he was in Hell on account of +it, and this was only done out of malice, to thwart Lucifer and to +endeavour to make the righteous Judge, who had damned them appear unjust. +But you would have been yet more surprised at the dexterity with which +the Arch Fiend laid bare their crimes, and answered their vain excuses +home. But when these were receiving the last infernal sentence, there +came forty scholars before the court, mounted on capering devils, more +ugly, if possible, than Lucifer himself. And when the scholars heard the +husbandmen arguing, they began to excuse themselves the more confidently. +But, oh! how ready the old Serpent was at answering them too, +notwithstanding their craft, and their learning. + +But as it was my fortune to hear similar disputations at another +tribunal, I will there give the history of the whole, in one mass; and +will at present relate to you what I next saw. Scarcely had Lucifer +uttered judgment upon these people, and sent them, for the cool +impertinence of their reasons, to the vast sheet, in the country of the +eternal ice, the teeth of the wretches beginning to chatter before they +saw their prison, when Hell began once more, to resound awfully with +terrible blows, harsh blustering thunders, and every sound of war. I +could see Lucifer turn black, and become like a statue; at this moment, +in rushed a little crooked, horned devil, panting and shivering. "What +is the matter?" said Lucifer. "The most perilous to you of all matters +since Hell has been Hell," said the imp; "all the extremes of the kingdom +of Darkness, have broken out against you, and against one another; +particularly those who had any old field in common. They are now at it, +tooth and nail, so that it is impossible to tear them from each other. + +"The soldiers are at loggerheads with the physicians, for carrying on +their trade of slaughter; there is a swarm of usurers at loggerheads with +the lawyers, for seeking to spoil their trade; the jurymen and the +duffers are pummelling the gentlemen, for swearing and cursing without +necessity; whereas, swearing and cursing formed part of their trade; the +harlots, and their associates, and millions of other old friends and +acquaintances, have fallen out, and are all in shatters. + +"But worse than all, is the contest between the old misers and their own +children, for dissipating their wealth and their money. 'Our property,' +say the pigtails, 'cost us much pain, whilst we were upon the earth, and +is causing us immense suffering _here_ for ever, yet ye have flung it all +away at ducks and drakes.' And the children, on the other hand, are +cursing and tearing the old skin-flints, most furiously, charging their +fathers with being the authors of their misery, by leaving them twenty +times _too much_, to distract them with pride and dissipation; whereas, a +_little_, with a blessing, might have made them happy in both their +states of existence." "Well," said Lucifer, "enough! enough! we have +more need of arms than words. Sirrah, this hubbub is owing to some great +neglect; go back, and pry into every watch, and discover who has been +neglectful; and what dangerous characters have been permitted to escape, +for there are some evils abroad, that are not known." Away he went, at +the word, and in the meanwhile, Lucifer and his potentates arose in +terror, and exceeding consternation, and caused the boldest bands of the +black angels to be assembled. When these were marshalled, he put himself +at the head of his own peculiar band, and marched forth to quell the +insurrection, whilst the potentates went other ways with their legions. + +Before the royal troop had gone any great distance, gleaming like the +lightning of the black abodes, (and we behind them,) behold the hubbub +advanced to meet them. "Silence, in the name of the king," said a +fiendish herald. There was no hearing; it was easier to tear the old +crocodile from his prey than one of these. + +But when the old tried soldiers of Lucifer broke into the midst of them, +the buzzing, the butting, and the blows began to slacken. "Silence, in +the name of Lucifer," said the hoarse cryer again. "What is the matter?" +said the king; "and who are these?" "There is nothing particularly the +matter," was the answer; "but the drovers, happening in the general +commotion to come in contact with the cuckolds, they went mutually to +butting, to try whose horns were hardest; and this butting might have +gone on for ever, if your horned champions had not interfered." "Well," +said Lucifer, "since you are all so ready with your arms, turn along with +me to quell other rioters." But when it was buzzed about among the other +rebels, that Lucifer was coming with three horned legions against them, +each slunk away to his lair. + +Thus Lucifer advanced without opposition, along the wildernesses of +Destruction, endeavouring to ascertain what was the commencement of the +disturbance, but could obtain no information. After a little time, +however, one of the spies of the king returned, quite out of breath. "O +most noble Lucifer!" said he, "prince Moloch has quieted part of the +North and has scattered thousands over the sheets of ice; but three or +four terrible evils are still out on the wind." "Who are they?" said +Lucifer. "_Slanderer_, and _Meddler_, and _Litigious Pettifogger_," said +he, "have broken their prisons and are at liberty." "Then it would be no +wonder," said the Arch Fiend, "if there should be yet more disturbance." + +At this moment there came another, who had been on the look-out towards +the South, with the information that the evil had begun to break out +there; but that three had been taken, who had previously turned every +thing topsy-turvy in the West, and these three were _Madam Bouncer_, +_Contriver_, and_ Coxcomb_. "Well," said Satan, who was standing next +but one to Lucifer, "since I tempted Adam from his garden, I have never +yet seen from his seed, so many evils out upon one piece of business. + +"Bouncer, Coxcomb, and Contriver on the one side," he added, "and on the +other Slanderer, Pettifogger, and Meddler are a compound, enough to make +a thousand devils sweat their bowels out." "It is no wonder," said +Lucifer, "that they are so detested by every body on earth, when they are +able to cause us so much trouble here." A little farther on, a great +bouncing lady struck against the king, as she was moving backwards. "Ho! +my aunt of the breeches," said a hoarse devil, "good night to you." "Yes, +your aunt, indeed! on what side pray?" said she, very wrathful, because +she was not called madam. + +"A pretty king are you, sir Lucifer," said she, "to keep such unmannerly +blockheads; it is a sin that so large a kingdom should be under one so +incompetent to govern them. O that I were made deputy over it!" At this +moment behold the _Coxcomb_, nodding his head in the dark, "Your servant, +sir," he would say to one over his shoulder.--"I hope you are quite +well," said he to another.--"Is there any service which I can render +you," to a third, smiling conceitedly.--"Your beauty ravishes my heart," +said he to the bouncing wench. "Oh! oh! away with this hell-dog," said +she; whilst every one cried, "away with this new tormentor! Hell upon +Hell is he!" "Bind him and her head to tail," said Lucifer. + +After a little time, behold _Courts Comprised_ held betwixt two devils. +"O ho! angel of patience," said Lucifer, "are you come? Hold him fast on +your peril," said he to the satellites. Before we had advanced far, +there came the _Contriver_ and the _Slanderer_ bound betwixt forty +devils, and whispering in each others ears. "O most mighty Lucifer!" +said the _Contriver_, "I am exceedingly grieved to see so much +disturbance in your dominions, but I will teach you a way to prevent such +in future, if you will but grant me a hearing. You only need, under +pretence of a general parliament, to summon all the damned to the glowing +pandemonium, and then cause the devils to cast them headlong into the +throat of _Unknown_, and the gulf to be closed over them, and then, I +warrant you, they will give you no more trouble." "See," said Lucifer, +frowning very horribly on the _Contriver_, "the universal Meddler is +still behind." On returning again to the porch of the infernal palace, +who should come with the fairest face imaginable to meet the king but the +_Meddler_. "O my liege," said he, "I have a word for you." "Perhaps I +have one or two for you," said the Fiend. "I have been," continued the +Meddler, "over half _Destruction_, to observe how your affairs are +standing. You have many officers in the East doing nothing at all; but +sitting still instead of looking to the torments of their prisoners, or +keeping guard over them, and this has been the cause of all this great +disturbance. Besides," said he, "many of your devils, and your damned +too, whom you dispatched to the world to tempt folks, are not returned, +though their time is out; and others have arrived in a sculking manner, +and not given an account of their errands." + +Then Lucifer caused the herald to proclaim another parliament; and lo! +before you could turn your hand, all the potentates and satellites were +met together, to hold the infernal sessions again. The first thing which +was done was to change the officers, and to cause a place to be made +about the throat of Unknown, for the reception of the Coxcomb, the +bouncing lady, and the rest; the two first were tied nose to nose, and +the other rioters tail to tail. Then a law was promulgated, that whoever +should henceforth neglect his duty, whether imp or lost man, should be +cast there among them until the day of judgment. At these words you +might see all the goblins--yea, Lucifer himself--tremble and look +agitated. The next thing was to call some devils and some damned to +reckoning, who had been sent to the world to hunt up recruits: the devils +gave a very good account of themselves; but some of the damned were lame +in their reckoning, and were sent to the hot school, where they were +scourged with twisted fiery serpents, for not learning their lesson +better. + +"Hear my complaint," said a little informing devil. "Here is a pretty +woman when trimmed out, who was sent up to the world, to hunt subjects +for you by means of their hearts; and to whom did she offer herself, but +to a hard-working labourer coming home late from his occupation, who +instead of enjoying himself with her, went upon his knees to pray against +the Devil and his angels: at another time, she went to a sick man." "Ha!" +said Lucifer, "cast her to that lost useless wench, who loved of yore +Einion ab Gwalehmai, {108} of Anglesey." "Stay," said the fair one, +"this is but the first offence. It is not yet above a year, since the +day when I breathed my last, and was damned to your accursed government." +"She speaks true, O king of Torments! It is not yet a year by three +weeks," said the devil who had brought her there. "Therefore," said she, +"how would you have me so well versed as the damned, who have been here +for three hundred, or out abroad depredating for five hundred years. If +you desire from me better service, let me go into the world another time +or two unchastised; and if I do not bring you twenty harlot-mongers, for +every year that I am out, inflict upon me whatever punishment you +please." But the verdict went against her, and she was condemned to +punishment for a hundred long years, that she might remember better the +second time. + +At this moment, behold another devil pushing a fellow forward. "Here you +have," said he, "a pretty dog of a messenger. As he was prowling about +his old neighbourhood, above stairs, the other night, he saw a thief +going to steal a stallion, and could not so much as help him to catch the +horse without showing himself, frightening the thief so by his horrible +appearance, that he took warning and became an honest man from that +time." "With the permission of the court," said the fellow, "if the +thief had got the gift from _above_ to see me, could I help it? But at +worst this is a single peccadillo," said he; "it is not above a hundred +years since the day which terminated my mortal career, yet how many of my +friends and neighbours have I not tempted hither after me, during that +time? May I be in the deepest pit, if I have not as much inclination for +the trade as the best of you; but now and then the craftiest will err." +"Here," said Lucifer, "cast him to the school of the fairies, who are yet +under the rod for their mischievous conduct of old, in strangling some +people and threatening others; startling by such behaviour their +neighbours from their heedlessness, upon whom the terror which they +caused, had probably more effect than twenty sermons would have had." + +Next appeared four catchpoles, an informer, and fifteen damned, hauling +two _devils_ forward. "See," said the informer, "lest you should lay the +blame of all that is mismanaged on the seed of Adam, we bring you two of +your old angels, who have spent their time above, quite as badly as the +two preceding. Here is a fellow who has been making as great a fool of +himself, as the Devil did at Shrewsbury the other day; who, in the midst +of the interlude of Doctor Faustus, whilst some, according to the custom +on such occasions, were committing adultery with their eyes, some with +their hands, others making assignations for the same purpose, and doing +various other things profitable to your kingdom, made his appearance to +play his own part; by which blunder, he drove every one from taking his +pleasure to praying. In like manner did this numskull act; for, whilst +journeying over the world, on hearing two wenches talking of walking +round the church at night, in order to see their sweethearts, he must +needs show himself in the figure he wears at home, to the two fools, who +on recovering their senses, which at first they lost from fright, +solemnly abjured all frivolity for ever. There's a ninny-hammer for you! +Instead of appearing like a devil, he ought to have divided himself and +assumed the forms of two dirty, unlicked boors; for the girls would have +imagined themselves bound to accept them, and then the filthy goblin +might have lived as husband with the two female parties, without +troubling a clergyman to perform the marriage. + +"And here is another," said he, "who went the last dark night, to visit +two young maidens in Wales, who were _turning the shift_; and instead of +enticing the girls to wantonness in the figure of a handsome youth, he +must needs go to one with a _hearse_ to sober her; and to the other with +the _sound of war_ in an infernal whirlwind, to drive her farther from +her senses than she was before, and there was no need for that. But this +is not the whole, for after going into the last girl, he cast her down +and tormented her furiously, so that her parents in horror, sent for some +of our enemies the clergy, to pray over her and cast him out, which they +did. Now, if he had been wise, instead of kicking up such a hubbub, he +would have tempted her quietly to despair, and to make away with herself. +On another time, wishing to gain some of the conventiclers, he went to +preach to them, and revealed the secrets of your kingdom; thus, instead +of hindering, assisting their salvation." At the word _salvation_, I +could see some emitting living fire for madness. "Capital stories both, +I won't deny," said the goblin; "but I hope that Lucifer will not permit +one of Adam's race of dirt, to put himself on an equality with me who am +an angel, of a species and descent far superior." "Ha!" said Lucifer, +"he may be sure of his punishment. But, sirrah, answer to these +accusations speedily and clearly, or by hopeless Destruction I will--" "I +have brought hither," said the goblin, "many a soul since Satan was in +the garden of Eden, and ought to know my trade better than this novice of +an informer." "Blood of an infernal fire-brand!" said Lucifer, "did I +not command you to answer speedily and clearly." "Do but hear me," said +the sprite. "As to preaching, by your own command I have been a hundred +times _preaching_, and have forbidden people to follow several of the +roads which lead to your territories, and yet silently, in the same +breath, have led them hither safe enough, by some other vain paths; as I +have done by preaching lately in Germany, and in one of the Faroe isles, +and various other places. + +"Thus through my preaching," he continued, "have come many of the +_superstitions_ of the papists, and the _old fables_ first to the world, +and the whole under the shape of some goodness. For who ever swallows +the hook without some bait? who ever would believe a story if there were +not some measure of _truth_ mingled with the falsehood; or some semblance +of _good_ to shade the _evil_? Thus if I find an opportunity in +preaching, to push in amongst a hundred correct and salutary counsels, +one of my own, with this one I will do you, either through +_contentiousness_ or _superstition_, more advantage than all the rest of +my counsels will do you harm." "Well," said Lucifer, "since you are of +such utility in your pulpit, I order you for seven years, to take up your +abode in the mouth of one of the barn-preachers, who will be sure to +utter the first thing which comes to his tongue's end. Then you will +find an opportunity to put in a word now and then, to your own purpose." + +There were still many more devils and damned who were twisting through +one another like lightning, around the throne of Terrors, to give an +account of what they had done, and again to receive commissions. But +suddenly and unexpectedly, an order was given to all the messengers and +the prisoners, to go out of the palace, every one to his hole, and to +leave the king and his chief counsellors there alone. "Had we not best +depart," said I to my companion, "lest they should find us?" "You need +not fear," said the angel "no unclean spirit will ever see through this +veil." Thus we continued there invisible, to see what was the matter. +Then Lucifer began to speak graciously to his counsellors, in this +manner:--"O ye, the chief spiritual evils!--ye, who for subtlety are +unequalled in Unknown, I request you in my need, to exert to the +uttermost your malicious wiles. No one here is unaware, that Britain and +the surrounding isles, constitute the kingdom most dangerous to my +authority, and most abounding with my enemies; and what is a hundred +times worse, there is at present there a queen, who does not offer to +turn once hitherward, either by the road of Rome on the one hand, or the +road of Geneva on the other. Notwithstanding, all the service which the +Pope has rendered us there for a long time, and Oliver for some years +past, how far are we from our object? what shall we do now? I am afraid +that we shall lose there our ancient possession, and our market entirely, +if we do not pave immediately some new way for its inhabitants to walk +in, for they know all the old roads which lead hither too well. And, +since yonder invincible fist shortens my chain, and prevents me from +going myself to the earth, counsel me, I pray you, as to whom I shall +make my deputy, to oppose yonder detestable queen, who is the deputy of +our enemy." "O mighty emperor of Darkness!" said Cerberus, the devil of +Tobacco, "make a deputy of me, from whom the crown of Britain derives the +third part of its revenue. I will go and will send to you a hundred +thousand of the souls of your enemies, through the hollow of a pipe." +"Well, well," said Lucifer, "you have done me excellent service, by +causing the proprietors of tobacco in India to be slaughtered, and those +who take it to die of diseases, and sending many to vend it idly from +house to house, and making others to steal in order to obtain it, and +thousands to love it so far, that they cannot be a day without it in +their right senses. + +"Therefore go and do thy best; but, I tell thee, that thou art little +better than nothing in the present exigency." Thereupon Cerberus sat +down, and uprose Mammon, devil of Money, and with a morose sinister look +said:--"I showed men the first mine from which they got money, and +therefore, I am always extolled and worshipped more than God; men undergo +for me trouble and danger, and place their whole mind, their delight, and +their trust upon me: there is no one easy, because he has not obtained +somewhat more of my favour, and the more they obtain the farther are they +ever from rest, until at length by seeking _easy circumstances_, they +arrive at the country of Eternal Torments. How many a crafty old miser +have I not deluded hither, along paths more difficult than those which +lead to the kingdom of Happiness? At fair or market, sessions or +elections, or any other assemblage of people, who has more subjects? who +has more power and authority than I? Cursing, swearing, fighting, +litigating, plotting, deceiving, striking, hoarding, murdering and +robbing, sabbath breaking and uncharitableness, all proceed from me: and +there is no other black mark, which stamps men as belonging to the fold +of Lucifer, which I have not a hand in giving, on which account I am +called 'the root of all evil.' Therefore if it seem good to your +majesty, I will go." And having said that he sat down. + +Then arose Apollyon. "I do not know," said he, "any thing that will +bring the Britons hither, more certainly than what brought +yourselves--that is _Pride_: if she ever plant her pole within them and +inflate them, there is no reason to fear that they will stoop to lift the +cross, or go through the narrow gate. I will go," said he, "with my +daughter Pride, and will cause the Welsh, by gazing on the magnificence +of the English, and the English, by imitating the frivolities of the +French, to tumble into this place before they know where they are." + +Next arose Asmodeus, devil of Wantonness. "You cannot but be aware," +said he, "O most mighty sovereign of the Abyss! and you, ye princes of +the country of Despair! how I have crammed the nooks of Hell through +debauchery and lasciviousness. What need have I to speak of the time, +when I kindled such a flame of lust in the whole world, that it was +necessary to send the flood, to clear the earth of its inhabitants, and +to sweep them to us in the unquenchable fire; or of Sodom and Gomorrah, +fair and pleasant cities, whose people I burnt with wantonness, till +their infernal lusts brought down a fiery shower, which drove them hither +alive to burn to all eternity; or of the vast army of the Assyrians, +which was slain all in one night on account of me? Sarah I disappointed +of seven husbands; Solomon, the wisest of men, and many thousand other +kings I blinded by means of women. Therefore," said he, "suffer me to go +with my _sweet sin_, and I will kindle in Britain the sparks of Hell so +universally, that it shall become one with this place of unextinguishable +flame; for there is not much chance, that any one will return from +following me, to lay hold of the paths of Life." And thereupon he sat +down. + +Then arose Belphegor, prince of _Sloth and Idleness_. "I am," said he, +"the great prince of Listlessness and Laziness; great is my power on +myriads of men of all ages and degrees. I am the still pool, where 'the +root of all evil' is generated; where coagulate the dregs of all +destructive corruption and filthiness. What would you be worth, +Asmodeus; or you, ye other master spirits of evil, without me who keep +the window open for you, without any watch, so that you may go into man +by his eyes, by his ears, by his mouth, and by every other orifice which +he has, whensoever you please. I will go, and will roll to you all the +inhabitants of Britain over the precipice in their sleep." + +Then arose Satan, the devil of _Deceit_, who sat next to Lucifer on his +left hand, and after turning a frightful visage on the king,--"It is +unnecessary for me," he said, "to declare my deeds to you, O lost +archangel! or to you, black princes of Destruction! because it was I who +struck the first blow which man ever received; and a mighty blow it was, +causing him to remain _mortal_, from the beginning of the world to its +end. Do you imagine that I, who despoiled the whole world, cannot at +present give counsel which will serve for a paltry islet? And cannot I, +who cheated _Eve_ in _Paradise_, vanquish _Anne_ in _Britain_? If no +natural craft will avail, and continued experience for more than five +thousand years, my counsel to you is, to dress up your daughter +_Hypocrisy_, to deceive Britain and its queen; you have not a daughter in +the world, so useful to you as she; she has more extensive authority and +more numerous subjects, than all your other daughters. Was it not +through _her_ that I cheated the first woman? It was: and ever from that +time she has remained and increased exceedingly upon the earth. At +present indeed, the whole vast world is but one _Hypocrisy_; and if it +were not for the skill of Hypocrisy, how should any one of us do business +in any corner of the world? Because if people were to see _sin_ in its +own _color_, and under its own _name_, who would ever come in contact +with it? The world would no more do so, than it would embrace the Devil +in his infernal shape and garb. If Hypocrisy were not able to disguise +her _name_, and the _nature_ of every _evil_, under the similitude of +some _good_, and were not able to give some evil nickname to all +_goodness_, no one would approach, and no one would covet evil at all. +Traverse the whole city of Destruction, and you will see her in every +corner. Go to the street of _Pride_, and enquire for an _arrogant man_, +or for a pennyworth of _coquetry_, mixed up by Pride; 'woe's me,' says +Hypocrisy, 'there is no such thing here; nothing at all I assure you in +the whole street but grandeur.' Or go to the street of _Lucre_, and +enquire for the house of the _Miser_; fie, there is no such person in it: +or for the house of the _murderer_ amongst the physicians: or the house +of the _arrant thief_ amongst the drovers, and see how you would fare; +you would sooner get into prison for enquiring, than get any body to +confess his name. Yes, Hypocrisy creeps between man and his own heart, +and conceals every _iniquity_ so craftily, under the name and similitude +of some virtue, that she has made every body almost unable to recognise +himself. _Avarice_ she will call _economy_. In her language +_dissipation_ is _innocent diversion_; _pride_ is _gentility_; a +_perverse_ _man _is a _fine manly fellow_; _drunkenness_ is _good +fellowship_, and _adultery_ is only the _heat of youth_. On the other +hand, if _she_ and her disciples are to be believed, the _devout man_ is +only a _hypocrite_ or a _blockhead_; the _gentle_ but a _sneaking dog_; +the _sober_ a mere _hunks_, and so on. Send her, therefore," he +continued, "thither, in her full array, I will warrant that she will +deceive every body, and that she will blind the counsellors and the +warriors, and all the officers, secular and ecclesiastical, and will draw +them hither in multitudes presently, by means of her _mask of changeable +hue_." And thereupon he sat down. + +Then Beelzebub arose, the devil of _Inconsiderateness_, and with a rough, +bellowing voice,--"I am," said he, "the mighty prince of _Bewilderment_; +to me it pertains to prevent man from reflecting upon and considering his +condition. I am the principal of those wicked, infernal _flies_ which +craze mankind, by keeping them ever in a kind of continual buzz, about +their possessions or their pleasures, without ever leaving them with my +consent, a moment's respite, to think about their courses or their end. +It ill becomes one of you, to attempt to put himself on an equality with +me, for feats useful to the kingdom of Darkness. For what is Tobacco but +one of my meanest instruments, to carry bewilderment into the brain? And +what is the kingdom of _Mammon_, but a branch of my vast domain? Yea, if +I were to recite the ties which I have on the subjects of _Mammon_ and +_Pride_--yea, and on the subjects of _Asmodeus_, _Belphegor_, and +_Hypocrisy_--no man would tarry a minute longer under the rule of one of +them. Therefore," said he, "I am the one to do the work, and let none of +you boast again about his merits." Then Lucifer the Great arose himself +from his burning throne, and with a would-be complaisant but nevertheless +frightful look on both sides,--"Ye master-spirits of eternal Night! ye +supreme possessors of the cunning of Despair!" he said, "though the vast +black gulf and the wilds of Destruction, are indebted to no one for +inhabitants, more than to my own royal majesty since I of yore, failing +to drag the Omnipotent from his possession, drew millions of you, my +swarthy angels to this place of horrors, and have since drawn millions of +men to you; nevertheless, it cannot be denied, that ye too have all done +your part, to sustain this vast infernal empire." + +Then Lucifer began to answer them one by one. "For one of late origin, I +will not deny, O _Cerberus_, that thou hast brought to us many a booty +from the island of our enemies, by means of tobacco, a weed the cause of +much deceit; for how much deceit is practiced in carrying it about, in +mixing it, and in weighing it: a weed which entices some people to bib +ale; others to curse, swear, and to flatter in order to obtain it, and +others to tell lies in denying that they use it: a weed productive of +maladies in various bodies, the excess of which is injurious to every +man's body, without speaking of his _soul_: a weed, moreover, by which we +get multitudes of the poor, whom we should never get, did they not set +their love on tobacco, and allow it to master them, and pull the bread +from the mouths of their children. + +"And as for you, my brother _Mammon_, your power is so universal, and +likewise so manifest upon the earth, that it has become a proverb that +'_any thing can be got for money_.' And undoubtedly," said he, turning +to Apollyon, "my beloved daughter _Pride_ is of great utility to us; for +what is more capable of injuring a man in his condition, his body, and +his soul, than that _proud_, _haughty idea_, which will make him squander +a _hundred pounds_ for display, rather than stoop to give a _crown_ for +peace. _She_ keeps people so stiff-necked, with their sight so intent on +lofty things, that it is a pleasure to see them, by staring and reaching +into the air, falling plump into the abysses of Hell. As for you, +_Asmodeus_, we all remember your great services of yore; no one keeps his +prisoners more firmly under the lock, and no one meets with less rebuke +than yourself--the whole rebuke, indeed, consisting in a little laughing, +at what is called wanton tricks. Yes, Asmodeus, I admit that your power +is very great; though I cannot help reminding you," he added, with a +jocular though truly infernal grin, "that you were all but starved, above +there, during the last dear years. As for you, my son _Belphegor_, lousy +prince of Sloth, nobody has afforded us more pleasure than yourself, so +very great is your authority amongst gentle and simple, even down to the +beggar. Nevertheless, if it were not for the skill of my daughter +_Hypocrisy_, in coloring and disguising, who would ever swallow one of +your hooks? And after all, if it were not for the diligent firmness of +my brother _Beelzebub_, in keeping men in _inconsiderate bewilderment_, I +question whether all of you united would be worth a straw. Now," said +he, "let us review the whole. + +"What would you be worth, Cerberus, with your excessive sucking, if it +were not for the assistance of Mammon? What merchant would ever fetch +your leaves from India, through so many perils, if it were not for the +sake of Mammon? And if it were not for _his_ sake, what king would +receive it, in Britain especially? And who, but for the sake of Mammon, +would carry it to every corner of the kingdom? But, notwithstanding +this, what wouldst thou be worth, Mammon, without Pride to squander thee +upon fine houses, magnificent garments, needless litigations, music, +horses and costly appurtenances, various dishes, beer and ale in a flood, +far above the _means_ and _rank_ of the possessor; for if money were used +within the limits of _necessity_ and _propriety_, of what advantage would +Mammon be to us? Thus you would be worth nothing without _Pride_; and +little would _Pride_ be worth without _Wantonness_, because bastards are +the most numerous and the fiercest subjects, which my daughter _Pride_ +possesses in the world. + +"You too, Asmodeus, prince of _Wantonness_, what would you be worth, if +it were not for _Sloth and Idleness_; where but for them would you get a +night's lodging? You could hardly expect it from a labourer or toiling +student. And you, Belphegor of Idleness, who would welcome you a minute, +attended as you would be with shame and reproach, if it were not for +Hypocrisy, who conceals your ugliness under the name of _internal +sickness_, or of a _well meaning person_, or under the shape of +_despising riches_ and the like. + +"And she too, my dear daughter _Hypocrisy_, what is she worth, or what +would she ever be worth, skilful and resolute sempstress as she is, if it +were not for your help, my eldest brother _Beelzebub_, mighty prince of +_Inconsiderateness_. If he would leave people leisure and respite, to +seriously consider the nature of things and their difference, how often +would they spy holes in the folds of the gold-cloth robe of _Hypocrisy_, +and perceive the hooks through the bait? What man, did not +Inconsiderateness deprive him of his senses, would chase baubles and +pleasures--evanescent, surfeiting, foolish and disgraceful--and prefer +them to _peace of conscience_, and glorious _everlasting happiness_? And +who would hesitate to suffer martyrdom for his faith, for an hour or a +day, or to endure affliction for forty or sixty years, if he would +reflect that his neighbours here are suffering in an hour, more than he +can ever suffer upon the earth? + +"_Tobacco_ then is nothing without _money_, nor money without _Pride_; +and Pride is but feeble without Wantonness, and Wantonness is nothing +without _Idleness_; Idleness without _Hypocrisy_, and Hypocrisy without +_Inconsiderateness_. But," said Lucifer, (and he raised his fiendish +hoofs on the fore claws,) "to speak my own opinion, however excellent all +these may be, I have a _friend_ to send against the she-enemy of Britain, +better than the whole." + +Then I could see all the chief devils, with their ghastly mouths opened +towards Lucifer, in anxious expectation of learning what this friend +might be, whilst I was as impatient to hear as they. "The one I allude +to," said Lucifer, "is called _Ease_; she is one whose merits I have too +long disregarded, and whose merit, Satan, you yourself disregarded of +yore, when in tempting Job you turned the unpleasant side of life towards +him. She is my darling, and her I now constitute deputy, immediately +next to myself, in all matters relating to my earthly government; Ease is +her name, and _she_ has damned more men than all ye together, and very +few would ye catch without _her_. For in _war_, _or danger_, _or +hunger_, _or sickness_, who would value _tobacco_, _or money_, or the +pomposity of Pride, or would entertain a thought of welcoming either +_Wantonness or Sloth_? Or who in such straits, would permit themselves +to be distracted either by _Hypocrisy or Inconsiderateness_? No, no! +they are too awake then, and not one of the infernal _flies of +Bewilderment_, which shows its beak, will buzz, during one of these +storms. But _Ease_, smooth Ease, is the nurse of you all: in her calm +shadow, and in her teeming bosom ye are all bred, and also every other +infernal worm of the conscience, which will come to gnaw its possessor +_here_ for ever, without intermission. + +"As long as _Ease_ lasts, there is no talk but of some species of +diversion, of banquets, bargains, pedigrees, stories, news, and the like. +There is no mention of _God_, except in idle swearing and cursing; +whereas the _poor_ and the _sick_, who know nothing of ease, have God in +their mouths and their hearts every minute. + +"But go ye also in the rear of her, and keep every body in his sleep and +his rest, in prosperity and comfort, abundance and carelessness; and then +you will see the poor honest man, as soon as he shall drink of the +alluring cup of Ease, become a perverse, proud, untractable churl--the +industrious labourer change into a careless, waggish rattler--and every +other person become just what you would desire him. Because pleasant +_Ease_ is what every one seeks and loves; she hears not counsel, fears +not punishment--if good, she will not recognise it--if bad, she will +foster it of her own accord. _She_ is the prime-temptation; the man who +is proof against _her_ tender charms, ye may fling your caps to--for we +must bid farewell for ever to his company. _Ease_, then, is my +terrestrial _deputy_, follow her to Britain, and be as obedient to her as +to our own royal majesty." + +At this moment the huge bolt was shaken, and Lucifer and his chief +counsellors were struck to the vortex of _extremest Hell_; and oh, how +horrible it was to see the throat of Unknown opening to receive them! +"Well," said the angel "we will now return; but you have not yet seen any +thing in comparison with the _whole_, which is within the bounds of +_Destruction_, and if you had seen the whole, it is nothing to the +inexpressible misery which exists in _Unknown_, for it is not possible to +form an idea of the World in extremest Hell." And at that word the +celestial messenger snatched me up to the firmament of the accursed +kingdom of Darkness, by a way I had not seen, whence I obtained, from the +palace along all the firmament of the black and hot _Destruction_, and +the whole _land of Forgetfulness_, even to the walls of the _city of +Destruction_, a full view of the accursed monster of a _giantess_, whose +feet I had seen before--I do not possess words to describe her figure. +But I can tell you that she was a _triple-faced giantess_, having one +very atrocious countenance turned towards the heavens, barking, snorting +and vomiting accursed abomination against the celestial king; another +countenance very fair towards the _earth_, to entice men to tarry in her +shadow; and another, the most frightful countenance of all, turned +towards _Hell_, to torment it to all eternity. She is larger than the +entire earth, and is yet daily increasing, and a hundred times more +frightful than the whole of Hell. She caused Hell to be made, and it is +she who fills it with inhabitants. If _she_ were removed from Hell, Hell +would become Paradise; and if she were removed from the earth, the little +world would become Heaven; and if she were to go to Heaven, she would +change the regions of bliss into utter Hell. There is nothing in all the +universe, (except herself,) that God did not create. She is the mother +of the four female deceivers of the city of Destruction; she is the +mother of _Death_; she is the mother of every _evil_ and _misery_; and +she has a fearful hold on every living man--her name is SIN. "_He who +escapes from her hook_, _for ever blessed is he_!" said the angel. +Thereupon he departed, and I could hear his voice saying, "_write down +what thou hast seen_, _and he who shall read it carefully shall never +have reason to repent_." + + + +The Heavy Heart. + + +Heavy's the heart with wandering below, +And with seeing the things in the country of woe; +Seeing lost men and the fiendish race, +In their very horrible prison place; +Seeing that the end of the crooked track + Is a flaming lake, + Where dragon and snake + With rage are swelling. +I'd not, o'er a thousand worlds to reign, + Behold again, + Though safe from pain, + The infernal dwelling. + +Heavy's my heart, whilst so vividly +The place is yet in my memory; +To see so many, to me well known, +Thither unwittingly sinking down. +To-day a hell-dog is yesterday's man, + And he has no plan, + But others to trepan + To Hell's dismal revels. +When he reach'd the pit he a fiend became, + In face and in frame, + And in mind the same + As the very devils. + +Heavy's the heart with viewing the bed, +Where sin has the meed it has merited; +What frightful taunts from forked tongue, +On gentle and simple there are flung. +The ghastliness of the damned things to state. + Or the pains to relate + Which will ne'er abate + But increase for ever, +No power have I, nor others I wot: + Words cannot be got; + The shapes and the spot + Can be pictured never. + +Heavy's the heart, as none will deny, +At losing one's friend or the maid of one's eye; +At losing one's freedom, one's land or wealth; +At losing one's fame, or alas! one's health; +At losing leisure; at losing ease; + At losing peace + And all things that please + The heaven under. +At losing memory, beauty and grace, + Heart-heaviness + For a little space + Can cause no wonder. + +Heavy's the heart of man when first +He awakes from his worldly dream accursed, +Fain would be freed from his awful load +Of sin, and be reconciled with his God; +When he feels for pleasures and luxuries + Disgust arise, + From the agonies + Of the ferment unruly, +Through which he becomes regenerate, + Of Christ the mate, + From his sinful state + Springing blithe and holy. + +Heavy's the heart of the best of mankind, +Upon the bed of death reclined; +In mind and body ill at ease, +Betwixt remorse and the disease, +Vext by sharp pangs and dreading more. + O mortal poor! + O dreadful hour! + Horrors surround him! +To the end of the vain world he has won; + And dark and dun + The eternal one + Beholds beyond him. + +Heavy's the heart, the pressure below, +Of all the griefs I have mentioned now; +But were they together all met in a mass, +There's one grief still would all surpass; +Hope frees from each woe, while we this side + Of the wall abide-- + At every tide + 'Tis an outlet cranny. +But there's a grief beyond the bier; + Hope will ne'er + Its victims cheer, + That cheers so many. + +Heavy's the heart therewith that's fraught; +How heavy is mine at merely the thought! +Our worldly woes, however hard, +Are trifles when with that compared: +That woe--which is known not here--that woe + The lost ones know, + And undergo + In the nether regions; +How wretched the man who exil'd to Hell, + In Hell must dwell, + And curse and yell + With the Hellish legions! + +At nought, that may ever betide thee, fret +If at Hell thou art not arrived yet; +But thither, I rede thee, in mind repair +Full oft, and observantly wander there; +Musing intense, after reading me, + Of the flaming sea, + Will speedily thee + Convert by appalling. +Frequent remembrance of the black deep + Thy soul will keep, + Thou erring sheep, + From thither falling. + + + + +Footnotes: + + +{3} Probably Cheshire; the North Welsh commonly call Chester Caer. + +{23} It is the custom of Mahometans, to lay aside their sandals, before +entering the Mosque. + +{49} Taliesin lived in the sixth century; he was a foundling, discovered +in his infancy lying in a coracle, on a salmon-weir, in the domain of +Elphin, a prince of North Wales, who became his patron. During his life +he arrogated to himself a supernatural descent and understanding, and for +at least a thousand years after his death he was regarded by the +descendants of the Ancient Britons, as a prophet or something more. The +poems which he produced procured for him the title of "Bardic King;" they +display much that is vigorous and original, but are disfigured by +mysticism and extravagant metaphor. The four lines which he is made to +quote above are from his Hanes, or History, one of the most spirited of +his pieces. When Elis Wynn represents him as sitting by a cauldron in +Hades, he alludes to a wild legend concerning him, to the effect, that he +imbibed awen or poetical genius whilst employed in watching "the seething +pot" of the sorceress Cridwen, which legend has much in common with one +of the Irish legends about Fin Macoul, which is itself nearly identical +with one in the Edda, describing the manner in which Sigurd Fafnisbane +became possessed of supernatural wisdom. + +{50} A dreadful pestilence, which ravaged Gwynedd or North Wales in 560. +Amongst its victims was the king of the country, the celebrated Maelgwn, +son of Caswallon Law Hir. + +{84} Llyn Tegid, or the lake of Beauty, in the neighbourhood of Bala. + +{93} The reader is left to guess what description of people these +prisoners were. They were probably violent fifth monarchy preachers. + +{100} An active London Magistrate, treacherously murdered by a gang of +papist conspirators in the reign of Charles the Second. + +{108} A celebrated Welsh poet, who flourished in the thirteenth century. +A short account of him will be found in Owen's Cambrian Biography. + + + +***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SLEEPING BARD*** + + +******* This file should be named 20634.txt or 20634.zip ******* + + +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: +http://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/2/0/6/3/20634 + + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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