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+ <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=iso-8859-1" />
+ <title>
+ The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Repairman, by Harry Harrison.
+ </title>
+ <style type="text/css">
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+<pre>
+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Repairman, by Harry Harrison
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The Repairman
+
+Author: Harry Harrison
+
+Illustrator: Kramer
+
+Release Date: July 14, 2007 [EBook #22073]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE REPAIRMAN ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Greg Weeks, Susan Carr and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+
+<h1>The Repairman</h1>
+
+<h2>By Harry Harrison</h2>
+
+<h3>Illustrated by Kramer</h3>
+
+<div class="blockquot">
+
+<p>Being an interstellar trouble shooter wouldn&#8217;t be so bad &hellip;
+if I could shoot the trouble!</p>
+
+</div>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> Old Man had that look of intense glee on his face that meant someone
+was in for a very rough time. Since we were alone, it took no great feat
+of intelligence to figure it would be me. I talked first, bold attack
+being the best defense and so forth.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I quit. Don&#8217;t bother telling me what dirty job you have
+cooked up, because I have already quit and you do not want to reveal
+company secrets to me.&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>The grin was even wider now and he actually chortled as he thumbed a
+button on his console. A thick legal document slid out of the delivery
+slot onto his desk.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;This is your contract,&#8221; he said. &#8220;It tells how and
+when you will work. A steel-and-vanadium-bound contract that you
+couldn&#8217;t crack with a molecular disruptor.&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>I leaned out quickly, grabbed it and threw it into the air with a single
+motion. Before it could fall, I had my Solar out and, with a wide-angle
+shot, burned the contract to ashes.</p>
+
+<p>The Old Man pressed the button again and another contract slid out on
+his desk. If possible, the smile was still wider now.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I should have said a <em>duplicate</em> of your contract&mdash;like this
+one here.&#8221; He made a quick note on his secretary plate. &#8220;I
+have deducted 13 credits from your salary for the cost of the
+duplicate&mdash;as well as a 100-credit fine for firing a Solar inside a
+building.&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>I slumped, defeated, waiting for the blow to land. The Old Man fondled
+my contract.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;According to this document, you can&#8217;t quit. Ever. Therefore
+I have a little job I know you&#8217;ll enjoy. Repair job. The Centauri
+beacon has shut down. It&#8217;s a Mark III beacon.&hellip;&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>&#8220;<em>What</em> kind of beacon?&#8221; I asked him. I have repaired
+hyperspace beacons from one arm of the Galaxy to the other and was sure
+I had worked on every type or model made. But I had never heard of this
+kind.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Mark III,&#8221; the Old Man repeated, practically chortling.
+&#8220;I never heard of it either until Records dug up the specs. They
+found them buried in the back of their oldest warehouse. This was the
+earliest type of beacon ever built&mdash;by Earth, no less. Considering
+its location on one of the Proxima Centauri planets, it might very well
+be the first beacon.&#8221; </p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I looked</span> at the blueprints he handed me and felt my eyes glaze with
+horror. &#8220;It&#8217;s a monstrosity! It looks more like a distillery
+than a beacon&mdash;must be at least a few hundred meters high.
+I&#8217;m a repairman, not an archeologist. This pile of junk is over
+2000 years old. Just forget about it and build a new one.&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>The Old Man leaned over his desk, breathing into my face. &#8220;It
+would take a year to install a new beacon&mdash;besides being too
+expensive&mdash;and this relic is on one of the main routes. We have
+ships making fifteen-light-year detours now.&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>He leaned back, wiped his hands on his handkerchief and gave me Lecture
+Forty-four on Company Duty and My Troubles.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;This department is officially called Maintenance and Repair, when
+it really should be called trouble-shooting. Hyperspace beacons are made
+to last forever&mdash;or damn close to it. When one of them breaks down,
+it is <em>never</em> an accident, and repairing the thing is never a matter of
+just plugging in a new part.&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>He was telling <em>me</em>&mdash;the guy who did the job while he sat back on his
+fat paycheck in an air-conditioned office.</p>
+
+<p>He rambled on. &#8220;How I wish that were all it took! I would have a
+fleet of parts ships and junior mechanics to install them. But its not
+like that at all. I have a fleet of expensive ships that are equipped to
+do almost anything&mdash;manned by a bunch of irresponsibles like
+<em>you</em>.&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>I nodded moodily at his pointing finger.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;How I wish I could fire you all! Combination space-jockeys,
+mechanics, engineers, soldiers, con-men and anything else it takes to do
+the repairs. I have to browbeat, bribe, blackmail and bulldoze you thugs
+into doing a simple job. If you think you&#8217;re fed up, just think
+how I feel. But the ships must go through! The beacons must
+operate!&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>I recognized this deathless line as the curtain speech and crawled to my
+feet. He threw the Mark III file at me and went back to scratching in
+his papers. Just as I reached the door, he looked up and impaled me on
+his finger again.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;And don&#8217;t get any fancy ideas about jumping your contract.
+We can attach that bank account of yours on Algol II long before you
+could draw the money out.&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>I smiled, a little weakly, I&#8217;m afraid, as if I had never meant to
+keep that account a secret. His spies were getting more efficient every
+day. Walking down the hall, I tried to figure a way to transfer the
+money without his catching on&mdash;and knew at the same time he was
+figuring a way to outfigure me.</p>
+
+<p>It was all very depressing, so I stopped for a drink, then went on to
+the spaceport.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">By</span> the time the ship was serviced, I had a course charted. The nearest
+beacon to the broken-down Proxima Centauri Beacon was on one of the
+planets of Beta Circinus and I headed there first, a short trip of only
+about nine days in hyperspace.</p>
+
+<p>To understand the importance of the beacons, you have to understand
+hyperspace. Not that many people do, but it is easy enough to understand
+that in this <em>non</em>-space the regular rules don&#8217;t apply. Speed and
+measurements are a matter of relationship, not constant facts like the
+fixed universe.</p>
+
+<p>The first ships to enter hyperspace had no place to go&mdash;and no way
+to even tell if they had moved. The beacons solved that problem and
+opened the entire universe. They are built on planets and generate
+tremendous amounts of power. This power is turned into radiation that is
+punched through into hyperspace. Every beacon has a code signal as part
+of its radiation and represents a measurable point in hyperspace.
+Triangulation and quadrature of the beacons works for
+navigation&mdash;only it follows its own rules. The rules are complex
+and variable, but they are still rules that a navigator can follow.</p>
+
+<p>For a hyperspace jump, you need at least four beacons for an accurate
+fix. For long jumps, navigators use as many as seven or eight. So every
+beacon is important and every one has to keep operating. That is where I
+and the other trouble-shooters came in.</p>
+
+<p>We travel in well-stocked ships that carry a little bit of everything;
+only one man to a ship because that is all it takes to operate the
+overly efficient repair machinery. Due to the very nature of our job, we
+spend most of our time just rocketing through normal space. After all,
+when a beacon breaks down, how do you find it?</p>
+
+<p>Not through hyperspace. All you can do is approach as close as you can
+by using other beacons, then finish the trip in normal space. This can
+take months, and often does.</p>
+
+<p>This job didn&#8217;t turn out to be quite that bad. I zeroed on the
+Beta Circinus beacon and ran a complicated eight-point problem through
+the navigator, using every beacon I could get an accurate fix on. The
+computer gave me a course with an estimated point-of-arrival as well as
+a built-in safety factor I never could eliminate from the machine.</p>
+
+<p>I would much rather take a chance of breaking through near some star
+than spend time just barreling through normal space, but apparently Tech
+knows this, too. They had a safety factor built into the computer so you
+couldn&#8217;t end up inside a star no matter how hard you tried.
+I&#8217;m sure there was no humaneness in this decision. They just
+didn&#8217;t want to lose the ship.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> was a twenty-hour jump, ship&#8217;s time, and I came through in the
+middle of nowhere. The robot analyzer chuckled to itself and scanned all
+the stars, comparing them to the spectra of Proxima Centauri. It finally
+rang a bell and blinked a light. I peeped through the eyepiece.</p>
+
+<p>A fast reading with the photocell gave me the apparent magnitude and a
+comparison with its absolute magnitude showed its distance. Not as bad
+as I had thought&mdash;a six-week run, give or take a few days. After
+feeding a course tape into the robot pilot, I strapped into the
+acceleration tank and went to sleep.</p>
+
+<p>The time went fast. I rebuilt my camera for about the twentieth time and
+just about finished a correspondence course in nucleonics. Most
+repairmen take these courses. Besides their always coming in handy, the
+company grades your pay by the number of specialties you can handle. All
+this, with some oil painting and free-fall workouts in the gym, passed
+the time. I was asleep when the alarm went off that announced planetary
+distance.</p>
+
+<p>Planet two, where the beacon was situated according to the old charts,
+was a mushy-looking, wet kind of globe. I tried to make sense out of
+the ancient directions and finally located the right area. Staying
+outside the atmosphere, I sent a flying eye down to look things over. In
+this business, you learn early when and where to risk your own skin. The
+eye would be good enough for the preliminary survey.</p>
+
+<p>The old boys had enough brains to choose a traceable site for the
+beacon, equidistant on a line between two of the most prominent mountain
+peaks. I located the peaks easily enough and started the eye out from
+the first peak and kept it on a course directly toward the second. There
+was a nose and tail radar in the eye and I fed their signals into a
+scope as an amplitude curve. When the two peaks coincided, I spun the
+eye controls and dived the thing down.</p>
+
+<p>I cut out the radar and cut in the nose orthicon and sat back to watch
+the beacon appear on the screen.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 358px;"> <img src="images/illio.jpg" width="358" height="500" alt="Illustration"
+title="" /> </div>
+
+<p>The image blinked, focused&mdash;and a great damn pyramid swam into
+view. I cursed and wheeled the eye in circles, scanning the surrounding
+country. It was flat, marshy bottom land without a bump. The only thing
+in a ten-mile circle was this pyramid&mdash;and that definitely
+wasn&#8217;t my beacon.</p>
+
+<p>Or wasn&#8217;t it?</p>
+
+<p>I dived the eye lower. The pyramid was a crude-looking thing of
+undressed stone, without carvings or decorations. There was a shimmer of
+light from the top and I took a closer look at it. On the peak of the
+pyramid was a hollow basin filled with water. When I saw that, something
+clicked in my mind.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Locking</span> the eye in a circular course, I dug through the Mark III
+plans&mdash;and there it was. The beacon had a precipitating field and a
+basin on top of it for water; this was used to cool the reactor that
+powered the monstrosity. If the water was still there, the beacon was
+still there&mdash;inside the pyramid. The natives, who, of course,
+weren&#8217;t even mentioned by the idiots who constructed the thing,
+had built a nice heavy, thick stone pyramid around the beacon.</p>
+
+<p>I took another look at the screen and realized that I had locked the eye
+into a circular orbit about twenty feet above the pyramid. The summit of
+the stone pile was now covered with lizards of some type, apparently the
+local life-form. They had what looked like throwing sticks and arbalasts
+and were trying to shoot down the eye, a cloud of arrows and rocks
+flying in every direction.</p>
+
+<p>I pulled the eye straight up and away and threw in the control circuit
+that would return it automatically to the ship.</p>
+
+<p>Then I went to the galley for a long, strong drink. My beacon was not
+only locked inside a mountain of handmade stone, but I had managed to
+irritate the things who had built the pyramid. A great beginning for a
+job and one clearly designed to drive a stronger man than me to the
+bottle.</p>
+
+<p>Normally, a repairman stays away from native cultures. They are poison.
+Anthropologists may not mind being dissected for their science, but a
+repairman wants to make no sacrifices of any kind for his job. For this
+reason, most beacons are built on uninhabited planets. If a beacon <em>has</em>
+to go on a planet with a culture, it is usually built in some
+inaccessible place.</p>
+
+<p>Why this beacon had been built within reach of the local claws, I had
+yet to find out. But that would come in time. The first thing to do was
+make contact. To make contact, you have to know the local language.</p>
+
+<p>And, for <em>that</em>, I had long before worked out a system that was
+fool-proof.</p>
+
+<p>I had a pryeye of my own construction. It looked like a piece of rock
+about a foot long. Once on the ground, it would never be noticed, though
+it was a little disconcerting to see it float by. I located a lizard
+town about a thousand kilometers from the pyramid and dropped the eye.
+It swished down and landed at night in the bank of the local mud wallow.
+This was a favorite spot that drew a good crowd during the day. In the
+morning, when the first wallowers arrived, I flipped on the recorder.</p>
+
+<p>After about five of the local days, I had a sea of native conversation
+in the memory bank of the machine translator and had tagged a few
+expressions. This is fairly easy to do when you have a machine memory to
+work with. One of the lizards gargled at another one and the second one
+turned around. I tagged this expression with the phrase, &#8220;Hey,
+George!&#8221; and waited my chance to use it. Later the same day, I
+caught one of them alone and shouted &#8220;Hey, George!&#8221; at him.
+It gurgled out through the speaker in the local tongue and he turned
+around.</p>
+
+<p>When you get enough reference phrases like this in the memory bank, the
+MT brain takes over and starts filling in the missing pieces. As soon as
+the MT could give a running translation of any conversation it heard, I
+figured it was time to make a contact.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I found</span> him easily enough. He was the Centaurian version of a
+goat-boy&mdash;he herded a particularly loathsome form of local life in
+the swamps outside the town. I had one of the working eyes dig a cave in
+an outcropping of rock and wait for him.</p>
+
+<p>When he passed next day, I whispered into the mike: &#8220;Welcome, O
+Goat-boy Grandson! This is your grandfather&#8217;s spirit speaking from
+paradise.&#8221; This fitted in with what I could make out of the local
+religion.</p>
+
+<p>Goat-boy stopped as if he&#8217;d been shot. Before he could move, I
+pushed a switch and a handful of the local currency, wampum-type shells,
+rolled out of the cave and landed at his feet.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Here is some money from paradise, because you have been a good
+boy.&#8221; Not really from paradise&mdash;I had lifted it from the
+treasury the night before. &#8220;Come back tomorrow and we will talk
+some more,&#8221; I called after the fleeing figure. I was pleased to
+notice that he took the cash before taking off.</p>
+
+<p>After that, Grandpa in paradise had many heart-to-heart talks with
+Grandson, who found the heavenly loot more than he could resist. Grandpa
+had been out of touch with things since his death and Goat-boy happily
+filled him in.</p>
+
+<p>I learned all I needed to know of the history, past and recent, and it
+wasn&#8217;t nice.</p>
+
+<p>In addition to the pyramid being around the beacon, there was a nice
+little religious war going on around the pyramid.</p>
+
+<p>It all began with the land bridge. Apparently the local lizards had been
+living in the swamps when the beacon was built, but the builders
+didn&#8217;t think much of them. They were a low type and confined to a
+distant continent. The idea that the race would develop and might reach
+<em>this</em> continent never occurred to the beacon mechanics. Which is, of
+course, what happened.</p>
+
+<p>A little geological turnover, a swampy land bridge formed in the right
+spot, and the lizards began to wander up beacon valley. And found
+religion. A shiny metal temple out of which poured a constant stream of
+magic water&mdash;the reactor-cooling water pumped down from the
+atmosphere condenser on the roof. The radioactivity in the water
+didn&#8217;t hurt the natives. It caused mutations that bred true.</p>
+
+<p>A city was built around the temple and, through the centuries, the
+pyramid was put up around the beacon. A special branch of the priesthood
+served the temple. All went well until one of the priests violated the
+temple and destroyed the holy waters. There had been revolt, strife,
+murder and destruction since then. But still the holy waters would not
+flow. Now armed mobs fought around the temple each day and a new band of
+priests guarded the sacred fount.</p>
+
+<p>And I had to walk into the middle of that mess and repair the thing.</p>
+
+<p>It would have been easy enough if we were allowed a little mayhem. I
+could have had a lizard fry, fixed the beacon and taken off. Only
+&#8220;native life-forms&#8221; were quite well protected. There were
+spy cells on my ship, all of which I hadn&#8217;t found, that would
+cheerfully rat on me when I got back.</p>
+
+<p>Diplomacy was called for. I sighed and dragged out the plastiflesh
+equipment.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Working</span> from 3D snaps of Grandson, I modeled a passable reptile head
+over my own features. It was a little short in the jaw, me not having
+one of their toothy mandibles, but that was all right. I didn&#8217;t
+have to look <em>exactly</em> like them, just something close, to soothe the
+native mind. It&#8217;s logical. If I were an ignorant aborigine of
+Earth and I ran into a Spican, who looks like a two-foot gob of dried
+shellac, I would immediately leave the scene. However, if the Spican was
+wearing a suit of plastiflesh that looked remotely humanoid, I would at
+least stay and talk to him. This was what I was aiming to do with the
+Centaurians.</p>
+
+<p>When the head was done, I peeled it off and attached it to an attractive
+suit of green plastic, complete with tail. I was really glad they had
+tails. The lizards didn&#8217;t wear clothes and I wanted to take along
+a lot of electronic equipment. I built the tail over a metal frame that
+anchored around my waist. Then I filled the frame with all the equipment
+I would need and began to wire the suit.</p>
+
+<p>When it was done, I tried it on in front of a full-length mirror. It was
+horrible but effective. The tail dragged me down in the rear and gave me
+a duck-waddle, but that only helped the resemblance.</p>
+
+<p>That night I took the ship down into the hills nearest the pyramid, an
+out-of-the-way dry spot where the amphibious natives would never go. A
+little before dawn, the eye hooked onto my shoulders and we sailed
+straight up. We hovered above the temple at about 2,000 meters, until it
+was light, then dropped straight down.</p>
+
+<p>It must have been a grand sight. The eye was camouflaged to look like a
+flying lizard, sort of a cardboard pterodactyl, and the slowly flapping
+wings obviously had nothing to do with our flight. But it was impressive
+enough for the natives. The first one that spotted me screamed and
+dropped over on his back. The others came running. They milled and
+mobbed and piled on top of one another, and by that time I had landed in
+the plaza fronting the temple. The priesthood arrived.</p>
+
+<p>I folded my arms in a regal stance. &#8220;Greetings, O noble servers of
+the Great God,&#8221; I said. Of course I didn&#8217;t say it out loud,
+just whispered loud enough for the throat mike to catch. This was
+radioed back to the MT and the translation shot back to a speaker in my
+jaws.</p>
+
+<p>The natives chomped and rattled and the translation rolled out almost
+instantly. I had the volume turned up and the whole square echoed.</p>
+
+<p>Some of the more credulous natives prostrated themselves and others fled
+screaming. One doubtful type raised a spear, but no one else tried that
+after the pterodactyl-eye picked him up and dropped him in the swamp.
+The priests were a hard-headed lot and weren&#8217;t buying any lizards
+in a poke; they just stood and muttered. I had to take the offensive
+again.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Begone, O faithful steed,&#8221; I said to the eye, and pressed
+the control in my palm at the same time.</p>
+
+<p>It took off straight up a bit faster than I wanted; little pieces of
+wind-torn plastic rained down. While the crowd was ogling this ascent, I
+walked through the temple doors.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;I would talk with you, O noble priests,&#8221; I said.</p>
+
+<p>Before they could think up a good answer, I was inside.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> temple was a small one built against the base of the pyramid. I
+hoped I wasn&#8217;t breaking too many taboos by going in. I
+wasn&#8217;t stopped, so it looked all right. The temple was a single
+room with a murky-looking pool at one end. Sloshing in the pool was an
+ancient reptile who clearly was one of the leaders. I waddled toward him
+and he gave me a cold and fishy eye, then growled something.</p>
+
+<p>The MT whispered into my ear, &#8220;Just what in the name of the
+thirteenth sin are you and what are you doing here?&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>I drew up my scaly figure in a noble gesture and pointed toward the
+ceiling. &#8220;I come from your ancestors to help you. I am here to
+restore the Holy Waters.&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>This raised a buzz of conversation behind me, but got no rise out of the
+chief. He sank slowly into the water until only his eyes were showing. I
+could almost hear the wheels turning behind that moss-covered forehead.
+Then he lunged up and pointed a dripping finger at me.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;You are a liar! You are no ancestor of ours! We
+will&mdash;&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Stop!&#8221; I thundered before he got so far in that he
+couldn&#8217;t back out. &#8220;I said your ancestors sent me as
+emissary&mdash;I am not one of your ancestors. Do not try to harm me or
+the wrath of those who have Passed On will turn against you.&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>When I said this, I turned to jab a claw at the other priests, using the
+motion to cover my flicking a coin grenade toward them. It blew a nice
+hole in the floor with a great show of noise and smoke.</p>
+
+<p>The First Lizard knew I was talking sense then and immediately called a
+meeting of the shamans. It, of course, took place in the public bathtub
+and I had to join them there. We jawed and gurgled for about an hour and
+settled all the major points.</p>
+
+<p>I found out that they were new priests; the previous ones had all been
+boiled for letting the Holy Waters cease. They found out I was there
+only to help them restore the flow of the waters. They bought this,
+tentatively, and we all heaved out of the tub and trickled muddy paths
+across the floor. There was a bolted and guarded door that led into the
+pyramid proper. While it was being opened, the First Lizard turned to
+me.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Undoubtedly you know of the rule,&#8221; he said. &#8220;Because
+the old priests did pry and peer, it was ruled henceforth that only the
+blind could enter the Holy of Holies.&#8221; I&#8217;d swear he was
+smiling, if thirty teeth peeking out of what looked like a crack in an
+old suitcase can be called smiling.</p>
+
+<p>He was also signaling to him an underpriest who carried a brazier of
+charcoal complete with red-hot irons. All I could do was stand and watch
+as he stirred up the coals, pulled out the ruddiest iron and turned
+toward me. He was just drawing a bead on my right eyeball when my brain
+got back in gear.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;Of course,&#8221; I said, &#8220;blinding is only right. But in
+my case you will have to blind me before I <em>leave</em> the Holy of Holies, not
+now. I need my eyes to see and mend the Fount of Holy Waters. Once the
+waters flow again, I will laugh as I hurl myself on the burning
+iron.&#8221; </p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">He</span> took a good thirty seconds to think it over and had to agree with me.
+The local torturer sniffled a bit and threw a little more charcoal on
+the fire. The gate crashed open and I stalked through; then it banged to
+behind me and I was alone in the dark.</p>
+
+<p>But not for long&mdash;there was a shuffling nearby and I took a chance
+and turned on my flash. Three priests were groping toward me, their
+eye-sockets red pits of burned flesh. They knew what I wanted and led
+the way without a word.</p>
+
+<p>A crumbling and cracked stone stairway brought us up to a solid metal
+doorway labeled in archaic script <em>MARK III BEACON&mdash;AUTHORIZED
+PERSONNEL ONLY</em>. The trusting builders counted on the sign to do the
+whole job, for there wasn&#8217;t a trace of a lock on the door. One
+lizard merely turned the handle and we were inside the beacon.</p>
+
+<p>I unzipped the front of my camouflage suit and pulled out the
+blueprints. With the faithful priests stumbling after me, I located the
+control room and turned on the lights. There was a residue of charge in
+the emergency batteries, just enough to give a dim light. The meters and
+indicators looked to be in good shape; if anything, unexpectedly bright
+from constant polishing.</p>
+
+<p>I checked the readings carefully and found just what I had suspected.
+One of the eager lizards had managed to open a circuit box and had
+polished the switches inside. While doing this, he had thrown one of the
+switches and that had caused the trouble.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Rather</span>, that had <em>started</em> the trouble. It wasn&#8217;t going to be ended
+by just reversing the water-valve switch. This valve was supposed to be
+used only for repairs, after the pile was damped. When the water was cut
+off with the pile in operation, it had started to overheat and the
+automatic safeties had dumped the charge down the pit.</p>
+
+<p>I could start the water again easily enough, but there was no fuel left
+in the reactor.</p>
+
+<p>I wasn&#8217;t going to play with the fuel problem at all. It would be
+far easier to install a new power plant. I had one in the ship that was
+about a tenth the size of the ancient bucket of bolts and produced at
+least four times the power. Before I sent for it, I checked over the
+rest of the beacon. In 2000 years, there should be <em>some</em> sign of wear.</p>
+
+<p>The old boys had built well, I&#8217;ll give them credit for that.
+Ninety per cent of the machinery had no moving parts and had suffered no
+wear whatever. Other parts they had beefed up, figuring they would wear,
+but slowly. The water-feed pipe from the roof, for example. The pipe
+walls were at least three meters thick&mdash;and the pipe opening itself
+no bigger than my head. There were some things I could do, though, and I
+made a list of parts.</p>
+
+<p>The parts, the new power plant and a few other odds and ends were chuted
+into a neat pile on the ship. I checked all the parts by screen before
+they were loaded in a metal crate. In the darkest hour before dawn, the
+heavy-duty eye dropped the crate outside the temple and darted away
+without being seen.</p>
+
+<p>I watched the priests through the pryeye while they tried to open it.
+When they had given up, I boomed orders at them through a speaker in the
+crate. They spent most of the day sweating the heavy box up through the
+narrow temple stairs and I enjoyed a good sleep. It was resting inside
+the beacon door when I woke up.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> repairs didn&#8217;t take long, though there was plenty of groaning
+from the blind lizards when they heard me ripping the wall open to get
+at the power leads. I even hooked a gadget to the water pipe so their
+Holy Waters would have the usual refreshing radioactivity when they
+started flowing again. The moment this was all finished, I did the job
+they were waiting for.</p>
+
+<p>I threw the switch that started the water flowing again.</p>
+
+<p>There were a few minutes while the water began to gurgle down through
+the dry pipe. Then a roar came from outside the pyramid that must have
+shaken its stone walls. Shaking my hands once over my head, I went down
+for the eye-burning ceremony.</p>
+
+<p>The blind lizards were waiting for me by the door and looked even
+unhappier than usual. When I tried the door, I found out why&mdash;it
+was bolted and barred from the other side.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;It has been decided,&#8221; a lizard said, &#8220;that you shall
+remain here forever and tend the Holy Waters. We will stay with you and
+serve your every need.&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>A delightful prospect, eternity spent in a locked beacon with three
+blind lizards. In spite of their hospitality, I couldn&#8217;t accept.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;What&mdash;you dare interfere with the messenger of your
+ancestors!&#8221; I had the speaker on full volume and the vibration
+almost shook my head off.</p>
+
+<p>The lizards cringed and I set my Solar for a narrow beam and ran it
+around the door jamb. There was a great crunching and banging from the
+junk piled against it, and then the door swung free. I threw it open.
+Before they could protest, I had pushed the priests out through it.</p>
+
+<p>The rest of their clan showed up at the foot of the stairs and made a
+great ruckus while I finished welding the door shut. Running through the
+crowd, I faced up to the First Lizard in his tub. He sank slowly beneath
+the surface.</p>
+
+<p>&#8220;What lack of courtesy!&#8221; I shouted. He made little bubbles
+in the water. &#8220;The ancestors are annoyed and have decided to
+forbid entrance to the Inner Temple forever; though, out of kindness,
+they will let the waters flow. Now I must return&mdash;on with the
+ceremony!&#8221; </p>
+
+<p>The torture-master was too frightened to move, so I grabbed out his hot
+iron. A touch on the side of my face dropped a steel plate over my eyes,
+under the plastiskin. Then I jammed the iron hard into my phony
+eye-sockets and the plastic gave off an authentic odor.</p>
+
+<p>A cry went up from the crowd as I dropped the iron and staggered in
+blind circles. I must admit it went off pretty well.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Before</span> they could get any more bright ideas, I threw the switch and my
+plastic pterodactyl sailed in through the door. I couldn&#8217;t see it,
+of course, but I knew it had arrived when the grapples in the claws
+latched onto the steel plates on my shoulders.</p>
+
+<p>I had got turned around after the eye-burning and my flying beast hooked
+onto me backward. I had meant to sail out bravely, blind eyes facing
+into the sunset; instead, I faced the crowd as I soared away, so I made
+the most of a bad situation and threw them a snappy military salute.
+Then I was out in the fresh air and away.</p>
+
+<p>When I lifted the plate and poked holes in the seared plastic, I could
+see the pyramid growing smaller behind me, water gushing out of the base
+and a happy crowd of reptiles sporting in its radioactive rush. I
+counted off on my talons to see if I had forgotten anything.</p>
+
+<p>One: The beacon was repaired.</p>
+
+<p>Two: The door was sealed, so there should be no more sabotage,
+accidental or deliberate.</p>
+
+<p>Three: The priests should be satisfied. The water was running again, my
+eyes had been duly burned out, and they were back in business. Which
+added up to&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Four: The fact that they would probably let another repairman in, under
+the same conditions, if the beacon conked out again. At least I had done
+nothing, like butchering a few of them, that would make them
+antagonistic toward future ancestral messengers.</p>
+
+<p>I stripped off my tattered lizard suit back in the ship, very glad that
+it would be some other repairman who&#8217;d get the job.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><b>&mdash;<span class="smcap">Harry Harrison</span></b></p>
+
+<div class="notes">
+
+<p class="center">Transcriber&#8217;s Note</p>
+
+<p>This etext was produced from <em>Galaxy</em> February 1958. Extensive research
+did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. copyright on this publication
+was renewed.</p>
+
+</div>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Repairman, by Harry Harrison
+
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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Repairman, by Harry Harrison
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The Repairman
+
+Author: Harry Harrison
+
+Illustrator: Kramer
+
+Release Date: July 14, 2007 [EBook #22073]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE REPAIRMAN ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Greg Weeks, Susan Carr and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+The Repairman
+
+By HARRY HARRISON
+
+Illustrated by KRAMER
+
+
+
+
+ Being an interstellar trouble shooter wouldn't be so bad ... if I
+ could shoot the trouble!
+
+
+The Old Man had that look of intense glee on his face that meant someone
+was in for a very rough time. Since we were alone, it took no great feat
+of intelligence to figure it would be me. I talked first, bold attack
+being the best defense and so forth.
+
+"I quit. Don't bother telling me what dirty job you have cooked up,
+because I have already quit and you do not want to reveal company
+secrets to me."
+
+The grin was even wider now and he actually chortled as he thumbed a
+button on his console. A thick legal document slid out of the delivery
+slot onto his desk.
+
+"This is your contract," he said. "It tells how and when you will work.
+A steel-and-vanadium-bound contract that you couldn't crack with a
+molecular disruptor."
+
+I leaned out quickly, grabbed it and threw it into the air with a single
+motion. Before it could fall, I had my Solar out and, with a wide-angle
+shot, burned the contract to ashes.
+
+The Old Man pressed the button again and another contract slid out on
+his desk. If possible, the smile was still wider now.
+
+"I should have said a _duplicate_ of your contract--like this one here."
+He made a quick note on his secretary plate. "I have deducted 13 credits
+from your salary for the cost of the duplicate--as well as a 100-credit
+fine for firing a Solar inside a building."
+
+I slumped, defeated, waiting for the blow to land. The Old Man fondled
+my contract.
+
+"According to this document, you can't quit. Ever. Therefore I have a
+little job I know you'll enjoy. Repair job. The Centauri beacon has shut
+down. It's a Mark III beacon...."
+
+"_What_ kind of beacon?" I asked him. I have repaired hyperspace beacons
+from one arm of the Galaxy to the other and was sure I had worked on
+every type or model made. But I had never heard of this kind.
+
+"Mark III," the Old Man repeated, practically chortling. "I never heard
+of it either until Records dug up the specs. They found them buried in
+the back of their oldest warehouse. This was the earliest type of beacon
+ever built--by Earth, no less. Considering its location on one of the
+Proxima Centauri planets, it might very well be the first beacon."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+I looked at the blueprints he handed me and felt my eyes glaze with
+horror. "It's a monstrosity! It looks more like a distillery than a
+beacon--must be at least a few hundred meters high. I'm a repairman, not
+an archeologist. This pile of junk is over 2000 years old. Just forget
+about it and build a new one."
+
+The Old Man leaned over his desk, breathing into my face. "It would take
+a year to install a new beacon--besides being too expensive--and this
+relic is on one of the main routes. We have ships making
+fifteen-light-year detours now."
+
+He leaned back, wiped his hands on his handkerchief and gave me Lecture
+Forty-four on Company Duty and My Troubles.
+
+"This department is officially called Maintenance and Repair, when it
+really should be called trouble-shooting. Hyperspace beacons are made to
+last forever--or damn close to it. When one of them breaks down, it is
+_never_ an accident, and repairing the thing is never a matter of just
+plugging in a new part."
+
+He was telling _me_--the guy who did the job while he sat back on his
+fat paycheck in an air-conditioned office.
+
+He rambled on. "How I wish that were all it took! I would have a fleet
+of parts ships and junior mechanics to install them. But its not like
+that at all. I have a fleet of expensive ships that are equipped to do
+almost anything--manned by a bunch of irresponsibles like _you_."
+
+I nodded moodily at his pointing finger.
+
+"How I wish I could fire you all! Combination space-jockeys, mechanics,
+engineers, soldiers, con-men and anything else it takes to do the
+repairs. I have to browbeat, bribe, blackmail and bulldoze you thugs
+into doing a simple job. If you think you're fed up, just think how I
+feel. But the ships must go through! The beacons must operate!"
+
+I recognized this deathless line as the curtain speech and crawled to my
+feet. He threw the Mark III file at me and went back to scratching in
+his papers. Just as I reached the door, he looked up and impaled me on
+his finger again.
+
+"And don't get any fancy ideas about jumping your contract. We can
+attach that bank account of yours on Algol II long before you could draw
+the money out."
+
+I smiled, a little weakly, I'm afraid, as if I had never meant to keep
+that account a secret. His spies were getting more efficient every day.
+Walking down the hall, I tried to figure a way to transfer the money
+without his catching on--and knew at the same time he was figuring a way
+to outfigure me.
+
+It was all very depressing, so I stopped for a drink, then went on to
+the spaceport.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+By the time the ship was serviced, I had a course charted. The nearest
+beacon to the broken-down Proxima Centauri Beacon was on one of the
+planets of Beta Circinus and I headed there first, a short trip of only
+about nine days in hyperspace.
+
+To understand the importance of the beacons, you have to understand
+hyperspace. Not that many people do, but it is easy enough to understand
+that in this _non_-space the regular rules don't apply. Speed and
+measurements are a matter of relationship, not constant facts like the
+fixed universe.
+
+The first ships to enter hyperspace had no place to go--and no way to
+even tell if they had moved. The beacons solved that problem and opened
+the entire universe. They are built on planets and generate tremendous
+amounts of power. This power is turned into radiation that is punched
+through into hyperspace. Every beacon has a code signal as part of its
+radiation and represents a measurable point in hyperspace. Triangulation
+and quadrature of the beacons works for navigation--only it follows its
+own rules. The rules are complex and variable, but they are still rules
+that a navigator can follow.
+
+For a hyperspace jump, you need at least four beacons for an accurate
+fix. For long jumps, navigators use as many as seven or eight. So every
+beacon is important and every one has to keep operating. That is where I
+and the other trouble-shooters came in.
+
+We travel in well-stocked ships that carry a little bit of everything;
+only one man to a ship because that is all it takes to operate the
+overly efficient repair machinery. Due to the very nature of our job, we
+spend most of our time just rocketing through normal space. After all,
+when a beacon breaks down, how do you find it?
+
+Not through hyperspace. All you can do is approach as close as you can
+by using other beacons, then finish the trip in normal space. This can
+take months, and often does.
+
+This job didn't turn out to be quite that bad. I zeroed on the Beta
+Circinus beacon and ran a complicated eight-point problem through the
+navigator, using every beacon I could get an accurate fix on. The
+computer gave me a course with an estimated point-of-arrival as well as
+a built-in safety factor I never could eliminate from the machine.
+
+I would much rather take a chance of breaking through near some star
+than spend time just barreling through normal space, but apparently Tech
+knows this, too. They had a safety factor built into the computer so you
+couldn't end up inside a star no matter how hard you tried. I'm sure
+there was no humaneness in this decision. They just didn't want to lose
+the ship.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+It was a twenty-hour jump, ship's time, and I came through in the middle
+of nowhere. The robot analyzer chuckled to itself and scanned all the
+stars, comparing them to the spectra of Proxima Centauri. It finally
+rang a bell and blinked a light. I peeped through the eyepiece.
+
+A fast reading with the photocell gave me the apparent magnitude and a
+comparison with its absolute magnitude showed its distance. Not as bad
+as I had thought--a six-week run, give or take a few days. After feeding
+a course tape into the robot pilot, I strapped into the acceleration
+tank and went to sleep.
+
+The time went fast. I rebuilt my camera for about the twentieth time and
+just about finished a correspondence course in nucleonics. Most
+repairmen take these courses. Besides their always coming in handy, the
+company grades your pay by the number of specialties you can handle. All
+this, with some oil painting and free-fall workouts in the gym, passed
+the time. I was asleep when the alarm went off that announced planetary
+distance.
+
+Planet two, where the beacon was situated according to the old charts,
+was a mushy-looking, wet kind of globe. I tried to make sense out of
+the ancient directions and finally located the right area. Staying
+outside the atmosphere, I sent a flying eye down to look things over. In
+this business, you learn early when and where to risk your own skin. The
+eye would be good enough for the preliminary survey.
+
+The old boys had enough brains to choose a traceable site for the
+beacon, equidistant on a line between two of the most prominent mountain
+peaks. I located the peaks easily enough and started the eye out from
+the first peak and kept it on a course directly toward the second. There
+was a nose and tail radar in the eye and I fed their signals into a
+scope as an amplitude curve. When the two peaks coincided, I spun the
+eye controls and dived the thing down.
+
+I cut out the radar and cut in the nose orthicon and sat back to watch
+the beacon appear on the screen.
+
+[Illustration]
+
+The image blinked, focused--and a great damn pyramid swam into view. I
+cursed and wheeled the eye in circles, scanning the surrounding country.
+It was flat, marshy bottom land without a bump. The only thing in a
+ten-mile circle was this pyramid--and that definitely wasn't my beacon.
+
+Or wasn't it?
+
+I dived the eye lower. The pyramid was a crude-looking thing of
+undressed stone, without carvings or decorations. There was a shimmer of
+light from the top and I took a closer look at it. On the peak of the
+pyramid was a hollow basin filled with water. When I saw that, something
+clicked in my mind.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+Locking the eye in a circular course, I dug through the Mark III
+plans--and there it was. The beacon had a precipitating field and a
+basin on top of it for water; this was used to cool the reactor that
+powered the monstrosity. If the water was still there, the beacon was
+still there--inside the pyramid. The natives, who, of course, weren't
+even mentioned by the idiots who constructed the thing, had built a nice
+heavy, thick stone pyramid around the beacon.
+
+I took another look at the screen and realized that I had locked the eye
+into a circular orbit about twenty feet above the pyramid. The summit of
+the stone pile was now covered with lizards of some type, apparently the
+local life-form. They had what looked like throwing sticks and arbalasts
+and were trying to shoot down the eye, a cloud of arrows and rocks
+flying in every direction.
+
+I pulled the eye straight up and away and threw in the control circuit
+that would return it automatically to the ship.
+
+Then I went to the galley for a long, strong drink. My beacon was not
+only locked inside a mountain of handmade stone, but I had managed to
+irritate the things who had built the pyramid. A great beginning for a
+job and one clearly designed to drive a stronger man than me to the
+bottle.
+
+Normally, a repairman stays away from native cultures. They are poison.
+Anthropologists may not mind being dissected for their science, but a
+repairman wants to make no sacrifices of any kind for his job. For this
+reason, most beacons are built on uninhabited planets. If a beacon _has_
+to go on a planet with a culture, it is usually built in some
+inaccessible place.
+
+Why this beacon had been built within reach of the local claws, I had
+yet to find out. But that would come in time. The first thing to do was
+make contact. To make contact, you have to know the local language.
+
+And, for _that_, I had long before worked out a system that was
+fool-proof.
+
+I had a pryeye of my own construction. It looked like a piece of rock
+about a foot long. Once on the ground, it would never be noticed, though
+it was a little disconcerting to see it float by. I located a lizard
+town about a thousand kilometers from the pyramid and dropped the eye.
+It swished down and landed at night in the bank of the local mud wallow.
+This was a favorite spot that drew a good crowd during the day. In the
+morning, when the first wallowers arrived, I flipped on the recorder.
+
+After about five of the local days, I had a sea of native conversation
+in the memory bank of the machine translator and had tagged a few
+expressions. This is fairly easy to do when you have a machine memory to
+work with. One of the lizards gargled at another one and the second one
+turned around. I tagged this expression with the phrase, "Hey, George!"
+and waited my chance to use it. Later the same day, I caught one of them
+alone and shouted "Hey, George!" at him. It gurgled out through the
+speaker in the local tongue and he turned around.
+
+When you get enough reference phrases like this in the memory bank, the
+MT brain takes over and starts filling in the missing pieces. As soon as
+the MT could give a running translation of any conversation it heard, I
+figured it was time to make a contact.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+I found him easily enough. He was the Centaurian version of a
+goat-boy--he herded a particularly loathsome form of local life in the
+swamps outside the town. I had one of the working eyes dig a cave in an
+outcropping of rock and wait for him.
+
+When he passed next day, I whispered into the mike: "Welcome, O
+Goat-boy Grandson! This is your grandfather's spirit speaking from
+paradise." This fitted in with what I could make out of the local
+religion.
+
+Goat-boy stopped as if he'd been shot. Before he could move, I pushed a
+switch and a handful of the local currency, wampum-type shells, rolled
+out of the cave and landed at his feet.
+
+"Here is some money from paradise, because you have been a good boy."
+Not really from paradise--I had lifted it from the treasury the night
+before. "Come back tomorrow and we will talk some more," I called after
+the fleeing figure. I was pleased to notice that he took the cash before
+taking off.
+
+After that, Grandpa in paradise had many heart-to-heart talks with
+Grandson, who found the heavenly loot more than he could resist. Grandpa
+had been out of touch with things since his death and Goat-boy happily
+filled him in.
+
+I learned all I needed to know of the history, past and recent, and it
+wasn't nice.
+
+In addition to the pyramid being around the beacon, there was a nice
+little religious war going on around the pyramid.
+
+It all began with the land bridge. Apparently the local lizards had been
+living in the swamps when the beacon was built, but the builders didn't
+think much of them. They were a low type and confined to a distant
+continent. The idea that the race would develop and might reach _this_
+continent never occurred to the beacon mechanics. Which is, of course,
+what happened.
+
+A little geological turnover, a swampy land bridge formed in the right
+spot, and the lizards began to wander up beacon valley. And found
+religion. A shiny metal temple out of which poured a constant stream of
+magic water--the reactor-cooling water pumped down from the atmosphere
+condenser on the roof. The radioactivity in the water didn't hurt the
+natives. It caused mutations that bred true.
+
+A city was built around the temple and, through the centuries, the
+pyramid was put up around the beacon. A special branch of the priesthood
+served the temple. All went well until one of the priests violated the
+temple and destroyed the holy waters. There had been revolt, strife,
+murder and destruction since then. But still the holy waters would not
+flow. Now armed mobs fought around the temple each day and a new band of
+priests guarded the sacred fount.
+
+And I had to walk into the middle of that mess and repair the thing.
+
+It would have been easy enough if we were allowed a little mayhem. I
+could have had a lizard fry, fixed the beacon and taken off. Only
+"native life-forms" were quite well protected. There were spy cells on
+my ship, all of which I hadn't found, that would cheerfully rat on me
+when I got back.
+
+Diplomacy was called for. I sighed and dragged out the plastiflesh
+equipment.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+Working from 3D snaps of Grandson, I modeled a passable reptile head
+over my own features. It was a little short in the jaw, me not having
+one of their toothy mandibles, but that was all right. I didn't have to
+look _exactly_ like them, just something close, to soothe the native
+mind. It's logical. If I were an ignorant aborigine of Earth and I ran
+into a Spican, who looks like a two-foot gob of dried shellac, I would
+immediately leave the scene. However, if the Spican was wearing a suit
+of plastiflesh that looked remotely humanoid, I would at least stay and
+talk to him. This was what I was aiming to do with the Centaurians.
+
+When the head was done, I peeled it off and attached it to an attractive
+suit of green plastic, complete with tail. I was really glad they had
+tails. The lizards didn't wear clothes and I wanted to take along a lot
+of electronic equipment. I built the tail over a metal frame that
+anchored around my waist. Then I filled the frame with all the equipment
+I would need and began to wire the suit.
+
+When it was done, I tried it on in front of a full-length mirror. It was
+horrible but effective. The tail dragged me down in the rear and gave me
+a duck-waddle, but that only helped the resemblance.
+
+That night I took the ship down into the hills nearest the pyramid, an
+out-of-the-way dry spot where the amphibious natives would never go. A
+little before dawn, the eye hooked onto my shoulders and we sailed
+straight up. We hovered above the temple at about 2,000 meters, until it
+was light, then dropped straight down.
+
+It must have been a grand sight. The eye was camouflaged to look like a
+flying lizard, sort of a cardboard pterodactyl, and the slowly flapping
+wings obviously had nothing to do with our flight. But it was impressive
+enough for the natives. The first one that spotted me screamed and
+dropped over on his back. The others came running. They milled and
+mobbed and piled on top of one another, and by that time I had landed in
+the plaza fronting the temple. The priesthood arrived.
+
+I folded my arms in a regal stance. "Greetings, O noble servers of the
+Great God," I said. Of course I didn't say it out loud, just whispered
+loud enough for the throat mike to catch. This was radioed back to the
+MT and the translation shot back to a speaker in my jaws.
+
+The natives chomped and rattled and the translation rolled out almost
+instantly. I had the volume turned up and the whole square echoed.
+
+Some of the more credulous natives prostrated themselves and others fled
+screaming. One doubtful type raised a spear, but no one else tried that
+after the pterodactyl-eye picked him up and dropped him in the swamp.
+The priests were a hard-headed lot and weren't buying any lizards in a
+poke; they just stood and muttered. I had to take the offensive again.
+
+"Begone, O faithful steed," I said to the eye, and pressed the control
+in my palm at the same time.
+
+It took off straight up a bit faster than I wanted; little pieces of
+wind-torn plastic rained down. While the crowd was ogling this ascent, I
+walked through the temple doors.
+
+"I would talk with you, O noble priests," I said.
+
+Before they could think up a good answer, I was inside.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+The temple was a small one built against the base of the pyramid. I
+hoped I wasn't breaking too many taboos by going in. I wasn't stopped,
+so it looked all right. The temple was a single room with a
+murky-looking pool at one end. Sloshing in the pool was an ancient
+reptile who clearly was one of the leaders. I waddled toward him and he
+gave me a cold and fishy eye, then growled something.
+
+The MT whispered into my ear, "Just what in the name of the thirteenth
+sin are you and what are you doing here?"
+
+I drew up my scaly figure in a noble gesture and pointed toward the
+ceiling. "I come from your ancestors to help you. I am here to restore
+the Holy Waters."
+
+This raised a buzz of conversation behind me, but got no rise out of the
+chief. He sank slowly into the water until only his eyes were showing. I
+could almost hear the wheels turning behind that moss-covered forehead.
+Then he lunged up and pointed a dripping finger at me.
+
+"You are a liar! You are no ancestor of ours! We will--"
+
+"Stop!" I thundered before he got so far in that he couldn't back out.
+"I said your ancestors sent me as emissary--I am not one of your
+ancestors. Do not try to harm me or the wrath of those who have Passed
+On will turn against you."
+
+When I said this, I turned to jab a claw at the other priests, using the
+motion to cover my flicking a coin grenade toward them. It blew a nice
+hole in the floor with a great show of noise and smoke.
+
+The First Lizard knew I was talking sense then and immediately called a
+meeting of the shamans. It, of course, took place in the public bathtub
+and I had to join them there. We jawed and gurgled for about an hour and
+settled all the major points.
+
+I found out that they were new priests; the previous ones had all been
+boiled for letting the Holy Waters cease. They found out I was there
+only to help them restore the flow of the waters. They bought this,
+tentatively, and we all heaved out of the tub and trickled muddy paths
+across the floor. There was a bolted and guarded door that led into the
+pyramid proper. While it was being opened, the First Lizard turned to
+me.
+
+"Undoubtedly you know of the rule," he said. "Because the old priests
+did pry and peer, it was ruled henceforth that only the blind could
+enter the Holy of Holies." I'd swear he was smiling, if thirty teeth
+peeking out of what looked like a crack in an old suitcase can be called
+smiling.
+
+He was also signaling to him an underpriest who carried a brazier of
+charcoal complete with red-hot irons. All I could do was stand and watch
+as he stirred up the coals, pulled out the ruddiest iron and turned
+toward me. He was just drawing a bead on my right eyeball when my brain
+got back in gear.
+
+"Of course," I said, "blinding is only right. But in my case you will
+have to blind me before I _leave_ the Holy of Holies, not now. I need my
+eyes to see and mend the Fount of Holy Waters. Once the waters flow
+again, I will laugh as I hurl myself on the burning iron."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+He took a good thirty seconds to think it over and had to agree with me.
+The local torturer sniffled a bit and threw a little more charcoal on
+the fire. The gate crashed open and I stalked through; then it banged to
+behind me and I was alone in the dark.
+
+But not for long--there was a shuffling nearby and I took a chance and
+turned on my flash. Three priests were groping toward me, their
+eye-sockets red pits of burned flesh. They knew what I wanted and led
+the way without a word.
+
+A crumbling and cracked stone stairway brought us up to a solid metal
+doorway labeled in archaic script _MARK III BEACON--AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL
+ONLY_. The trusting builders counted on the sign to do the whole job,
+for there wasn't a trace of a lock on the door. One lizard merely turned
+the handle and we were inside the beacon.
+
+I unzipped the front of my camouflage suit and pulled out the
+blueprints. With the faithful priests stumbling after me, I located the
+control room and turned on the lights. There was a residue of charge in
+the emergency batteries, just enough to give a dim light. The meters and
+indicators looked to be in good shape; if anything, unexpectedly bright
+from constant polishing.
+
+I checked the readings carefully and found just what I had suspected.
+One of the eager lizards had managed to open a circuit box and had
+polished the switches inside. While doing this, he had thrown one of the
+switches and that had caused the trouble.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+Rather, that had _started_ the trouble. It wasn't going to be ended by
+just reversing the water-valve switch. This valve was supposed to be
+used only for repairs, after the pile was damped. When the water was cut
+off with the pile in operation, it had started to overheat and the
+automatic safeties had dumped the charge down the pit.
+
+I could start the water again easily enough, but there was no fuel left
+in the reactor.
+
+I wasn't going to play with the fuel problem at all. It would be far
+easier to install a new power plant. I had one in the ship that was
+about a tenth the size of the ancient bucket of bolts and produced at
+least four times the power. Before I sent for it, I checked over the
+rest of the beacon. In 2000 years, there should be _some_ sign of wear.
+
+The old boys had built well, I'll give them credit for that. Ninety per
+cent of the machinery had no moving parts and had suffered no wear
+whatever. Other parts they had beefed up, figuring they would wear, but
+slowly. The water-feed pipe from the roof, for example. The pipe walls
+were at least three meters thick--and the pipe opening itself no bigger
+than my head. There were some things I could do, though, and I made a
+list of parts.
+
+The parts, the new power plant and a few other odds and ends were chuted
+into a neat pile on the ship. I checked all the parts by screen before
+they were loaded in a metal crate. In the darkest hour before dawn, the
+heavy-duty eye dropped the crate outside the temple and darted away
+without being seen.
+
+I watched the priests through the pryeye while they tried to open it.
+When they had given up, I boomed orders at them through a speaker in the
+crate. They spent most of the day sweating the heavy box up through the
+narrow temple stairs and I enjoyed a good sleep. It was resting inside
+the beacon door when I woke up.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+The repairs didn't take long, though there was plenty of groaning from
+the blind lizards when they heard me ripping the wall open to get at the
+power leads. I even hooked a gadget to the water pipe so their Holy
+Waters would have the usual refreshing radioactivity when they started
+flowing again. The moment this was all finished, I did the job they were
+waiting for.
+
+I threw the switch that started the water flowing again.
+
+There were a few minutes while the water began to gurgle down through
+the dry pipe. Then a roar came from outside the pyramid that must have
+shaken its stone walls. Shaking my hands once over my head, I went down
+for the eye-burning ceremony.
+
+The blind lizards were waiting for me by the door and looked even
+unhappier than usual. When I tried the door, I found out why--it was
+bolted and barred from the other side.
+
+"It has been decided," a lizard said, "that you shall remain here
+forever and tend the Holy Waters. We will stay with you and serve your
+every need."
+
+A delightful prospect, eternity spent in a locked beacon with three
+blind lizards. In spite of their hospitality, I couldn't accept.
+
+"What--you dare interfere with the messenger of your ancestors!" I had
+the speaker on full volume and the vibration almost shook my head off.
+
+The lizards cringed and I set my Solar for a narrow beam and ran it
+around the door jamb. There was a great crunching and banging from the
+junk piled against it, and then the door swung free. I threw it open.
+Before they could protest, I had pushed the priests out through it.
+
+The rest of their clan showed up at the foot of the stairs and made a
+great ruckus while I finished welding the door shut. Running through the
+crowd, I faced up to the First Lizard in his tub. He sank slowly beneath
+the surface.
+
+"What lack of courtesy!" I shouted. He made little bubbles in the water.
+"The ancestors are annoyed and have decided to forbid entrance to the
+Inner Temple forever; though, out of kindness, they will let the waters
+flow. Now I must return--on with the ceremony!"
+
+The torture-master was too frightened to move, so I grabbed out his hot
+iron. A touch on the side of my face dropped a steel plate over my eyes,
+under the plastiskin. Then I jammed the iron hard into my phony
+eye-sockets and the plastic gave off an authentic odor.
+
+A cry went up from the crowd as I dropped the iron and staggered in
+blind circles. I must admit it went off pretty well.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+Before they could get any more bright ideas, I threw the switch and my
+plastic pterodactyl sailed in through the door. I couldn't see it, of
+course, but I knew it had arrived when the grapples in the claws latched
+onto the steel plates on my shoulders.
+
+I had got turned around after the eye-burning and my flying beast hooked
+onto me backward. I had meant to sail out bravely, blind eyes facing
+into the sunset; instead, I faced the crowd as I soared away, so I made
+the most of a bad situation and threw them a snappy military salute.
+Then I was out in the fresh air and away.
+
+When I lifted the plate and poked holes in the seared plastic, I could
+see the pyramid growing smaller behind me, water gushing out of the base
+and a happy crowd of reptiles sporting in its radioactive rush. I
+counted off on my talons to see if I had forgotten anything.
+
+One: The beacon was repaired.
+
+Two: The door was sealed, so there should be no more sabotage,
+accidental or deliberate.
+
+Three: The priests should be satisfied. The water was running again, my
+eyes had been duly burned out, and they were back in business. Which
+added up to--
+
+Four: The fact that they would probably let another repairman in, under
+the same conditions, if the beacon conked out again. At least I had done
+nothing, like butchering a few of them, that would make them
+antagonistic toward future ancestral messengers.
+
+I stripped off my tattered lizard suit back in the ship, very glad that
+it would be some other repairman who'd get the job.
+
+--HARRY HARRISON
+
+
+
+
+Transcriber's Note:
+
+This etext was produced from _Galaxy_ February 1958. Extensive research
+did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. copyright on this publication
+was renewed.
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Repairman, by Harry Harrison
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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
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