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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/429-h.zip b/429-h.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..8f72470 --- /dev/null +++ b/429-h.zip diff --git a/429-h/429-h.htm b/429-h/429-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..052b4c5 --- /dev/null +++ b/429-h/429-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,11650 @@ +<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.01 Transitional//EN"> +<HTML> +<HEAD> + +<META HTTP-EQUIV="Content-Type" CONTENT="text/html; charset=iso-8859-1"> + +<TITLE> +The Magic Egg and Other Stories +</TITLE> + +<STYLE TYPE="text/css"> +BODY { color: Black; + background: White; + margin-right: 5%; + margin-left: 10%; + font-size: medium; + font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; + text-align: justify } + +P {text-indent: 4% } + +P.noindent {text-indent: 0% } + +P.poem {text-indent: 0%; + margin-left: 10%; + font-size: small } + +P.letter {font-size: small ; + margin-left: 10% ; + margin-right: 10% } + +P.salutation {font-size: small ; + text-indent: 0%; + margin-left: 10% ; + margin-right: 10% } + +P.closing {font-size: small ; + text-indent: 0%; + margin-left: 10% ; + margin-right: 10% } + +P.footnote {font-size: small ; + text-indent: 0% ; + margin-left: 0% ; + margin-right: 0% } + +P.transnote {font-size: small ; + text-indent: 0% ; + margin-left: 0% ; + margin-right: 0% } + +P.index {font-size: small ; + text-indent: -5% ; + margin-left: 5% ; + margin-right: 0% } + +P.intro {font-size: medium ; + text-indent: -5% ; + margin-left: 5% ; + margin-right: 0% } + +P.dedication {text-indent: 0%; + margin-left: 15%; + text-align: justify } + +P.published {font-size: small ; + text-indent: 0% ; + margin-left: 15% } + +P.quote {font-size: small ; + text-indent: 4% ; + margin-left: 0% ; + margin-right: 0% } + +P.report {font-size: small ; + text-indent: 4% ; + margin-left: 0% ; + margin-right: 0% } + +P.report2 {font-size: small ; + text-indent: 4% ; + margin-left: 10% ; + margin-right: 10% } + +P.finis { text-align: center ; + text-indent: 0% ; + margin-left: 0% ; + margin-right: 0% } + +H3.h3left { margin-left: 0%; + margin-right: 1%; + margin-bottom: .5% ; + margin-top: 0; + float: left ; + clear: left ; + text-align: center } + +H3.h3right { margin-left: 1%; + margin-right: 0 ; + margin-bottom: .5% ; + margin-top: 0; + float: right ; + clear: right ; + text-align: center } + +H3.h3center { margin-left: 0; + margin-right: 0 ; + margin-bottom: .5% ; + margin-top: 0; + float: none ; + clear: both ; + text-align: center } + +H4.h4left { margin-left: 0%; + margin-right: 1%; + margin-bottom: .5% ; + margin-top: 0; + float: left ; + clear: left ; + text-align: center } + +H4.h4right { margin-left: 1%; + margin-right: 0 ; + margin-bottom: .5% ; + margin-top: 0; + float: right ; + clear: right ; + text-align: center } + +H4.h4center { margin-left: 0; + margin-right: 0 ; + margin-bottom: .5% ; + margin-top: 0; + float: none ; + clear: both ; + text-align: center } + +H5.h5left { margin-left: 0%; + margin-right: 1%; + margin-bottom: .5% ; + margin-top: 0; + float: left ; + clear: left ; + text-align: center } + +H5.h5right { margin-left: 1%; + margin-right: 0 ; + margin-bottom: .5% ; + margin-top: 0; + float: right ; + clear: right ; + text-align: center } + +H5.h5center { margin-left: 0; + margin-right: 0 ; + margin-bottom: .5% ; + margin-top: 0; + float: none ; + clear: both ; + text-align: center } + +IMG.imgleft { float: left; + clear: left; + margin-left: 0; + margin-bottom: 0; + margin-top: 1%; + margin-right: 1%; + padding: 0; + text-align: center } + +IMG.imgright {float: right; + clear: right; + margin-left: 1%; + margin-bottom: 0; + margin-top: 1%; + margin-right: 0; + padding: 0; + text-align: center } + +IMG.imgcenter { margin-left: auto; + margin-bottom: 0; + margin-top: 1%; + margin-right: auto; } + +.pagenum { position: absolute; + left: 1%; + font-size: 95%; + text-align: left; + text-indent: 0; + font-style: normal; + font-weight: normal; + font-variant: normal; } + +.sidenote { left: 0%; + font-size: 65%; + text-align: left; + text-indent: 0%; + width: 17%; + float: left; + clear: left; + padding-left: 0%; + padding-right: 2%; + padding-top: 2%; + padding-bottom: 2%; + font-style: normal; + font-weight: normal; + font-variant: normal; } + + + +</STYLE> + +</HEAD> + +<BODY> + + +<pre> + +Project Gutenberg's The Magic Egg and Other Stories, by Frank Stockton + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Magic Egg and Other Stories + +Author: Frank Stockton + +Release Date: February 3, 2008 [EBook #429] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MAGIC EGG AND OTHER STORIES *** + + + + + + + + + + +</pre> + + +<H1 ALIGN="center"> +THE MAGIC EGG +<BR> +AND OTHER STORIES +</H1> + +<BR> + +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +BY +</H3> + +<H2 ALIGN="center"> +FRANK R. STOCKTON +</H2> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<H2 ALIGN="center"> +CONTENTS +</H2> + +<BR> + +<P CLASS="noindent"> +<A HREF="#chap01">THE MAGIC EGG</A><BR> +<A HREF="#chap02">"HIS WIFE'S DECEASED SISTER"</A><BR> +<A HREF="#chap03">THE WIDOW'S CRUISE</A><BR> +<A HREF="#chap04">CAPTAIN ELI'S BEST EAR</A><BR> +<A HREF="#chap05">LOVE BEFORE BREAKFAST</A><BR> +<A HREF="#chap06">THE STAYING POWER OF SIR ROHAN</A><BR> +<A HREF="#chap07">A PIECE OF RED CALICO</A><BR> +<A HREF="#chap08">THE CHRISTMAS WRECK</A><BR> +<A HREF="#chap09">MY WELL AND WHAT CAME OUT OF IT</A><BR> +<A HREF="#chap10">MR. TOLMAN</A><BR> +<A HREF="#chap11">MY UNWILLING NEIGHBOR</A><BR> +<A HREF="#chap12">OUR ARCHERY CLUB</A><BR> +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<A NAME="chap01"></A> +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +THE MAGIC EGG +</H3> + +<P> +The pretty little theatre attached to the building of the Unicorn Club +had been hired for a certain January afternoon by Mr. Herbert Loring, +who wished to give therein a somewhat novel performance, to which he +had invited a small audience consisting entirely of friends and +acquaintances. +</P> + +<P> +Loring was a handsome fellow about thirty years old, who had travelled +far and studied much. He had recently made a long sojourn in the far +East, and his friends had been invited to the theatre to see some of +the wonderful things he had brought from that country of wonders. As +Loring was a club-man, and belonged to a family of good social +standing, his circle of acquaintances was large, and in this circle a +good many unpleasant remarks had been made regarding the proposed +entertainment—made, of course, by the people who had not been invited +to be present. Some of the gossip on the subject had reached Loring, +who did not hesitate to say that he could not talk to a crowd, and that +he did not care to show the curious things he had collected to people +who would not thoroughly appreciate them. He had been very particular +in regard to his invitations. +</P> + +<P> +At three o'clock on the appointed afternoon nearly all the people who +had been invited to the Unicorn Theatre were in their seats. No one +had stayed away except for some very good reason, for it was well known +that if Herbert Loring offered to show anything it was worth seeing. +</P> + +<P> +About forty people were present, who sat talking to one another, or +admiring the decoration of the theatre. As Loring stood upon the +stage—where he was entirely alone, his exhibition requiring no +assistants—he gazed through a loophole in the curtain upon a very +interesting array of faces. There were the faces of many men and women +of society, of students, of workers in various fields of thought, and +even of idlers in all fields of thought; but there was not one which +indicated a frivolous or listless disposition. The owners of those +faces had come to see something, and they wished to see it. +</P> + +<P> +For a quarter of an hour after the time announced for the opening of +the exhibition Loring peered through the hole in the curtain, and then, +although all the people he had expected had not arrived, he felt it +would not do for him to wait any longer. The audience was composed of +well-bred and courteous men and women, but despite their polite +self-restraint Loring could see that some of them were getting tired of +waiting. So, very reluctantly, and feeling that further delay was +impossible, he raised the curtain and came forward on the stage. +</P> + +<P> +Briefly he announced that the exhibition would open with some fireworks +he had brought from Corea. It was plain to see that the statement that +fireworks were about to be set off on a theatre stage, by an amateur, +had rather startled some of the audience, and Loring hastened to +explain that these were not real fireworks, but that they were +contrivances made of colored glass, which were illuminated by the +powerful lens of a lantern which was placed out of sight, and while the +apparent pyrotechnic display would resemble fireworks of strange and +grotesque designs, it would be absolutely without danger. He brought +out some little bunches of bits of colored glass, hung them at some +distance apart on a wire which was stretched across the stage just high +enough for him to reach it, and then lighted his lantern, which he +placed in one of the wings, lowered all the lights in the theatre, and +began his exhibition. +</P> + +<P> +As Loring turned his lantern on one of the clusters of glass lenses, +strips, and points, and, unseen himself, caused them to move by means +of long cords attached, the effects were beautiful and marvellous. +Little wheels of colored fire rapidly revolved, miniature rockets +appeared to rise a few feet and to explode in the air, and while all +the ordinary forms of fireworks were produced on a diminutive scale, +there were some effects that were entirely novel to the audience. As +the light was turned successively upon one and another of the clusters +of glass, sometimes it would flash along the whole line so rapidly that +all the various combinations of color and motion seemed to be combined +in one, and then for a time each particular set of fireworks would +blaze, sparkle, and coruscate by itself, scattering particles of +colored light as if they had been real sparks of fire. +</P> + +<P> +This curious and beautiful exhibition of miniature pyrotechnics was +extremely interesting to the audience, who gazed upward with rapt and +eager attention at the line of wheels, stars, and revolving spheres. +So far as interest gave evidence of satisfaction, there was never a +better satisfied audience. At first there had been some hushed murmurs +of pleasure, but very soon the attention of every one seemed so +completely engrossed by the dazzling display that they simply gazed in +silence. +</P> + +<P> +For twenty minutes or longer the glittering show went on, and not a +sign of weariness or inattention was made by any one of the assembled +company. Then gradually the colors of the little fireworks faded, the +stars and wheels revolved more slowly, the lights in the body of the +theatre were gradually raised, and the stage curtain went softly down. +</P> + +<P> +Anxiously, and a little pale, Herbert Loring peered through the +loophole in the curtain. It was not easy to judge of the effects of +his exhibition, and he did not know whether or not it had been a +success. There was no applause, but, on the other hand, there was no +signs that any one resented the exhibition as a childish display of +colored lights. It was impossible to look upon that audience without +believing that they had been thoroughly interested in what they had +seen, and that they expected to see more. +</P> + +<P> +For two or three minutes Loring gazed through his loophole, and then, +still with some doubt in his heart, but with a little more color in his +checks, he prepared for the second part of his performance. +</P> + +<P> +At this moment there entered the theatre, at the very back of the +house, a young lady. She was handsome and well dressed, and as she +opened the door—Loring had employed no ushers or other assistants in +this little social performance—she paused for a moment and looked into +the theatre, and then noiselessly stepped to a chair in the back row +and sat down. +</P> + +<P> +This was Edith Starr, who, a month before, had been betrothed to +Herbert Loring. Edith and her mother had been invited to this +performance, and front seats had been reserved for them, for each guest +had received a numbered card. But Mrs. Starr had a headache, and could +not go out that afternoon, and for a time her daughter had thought that +she, too, must give up the pleasure Loring had promised her, and stay +with her mother. But when the elder lady dropped into a quiet sleep, +Edith thought that, late as it was, she would go by herself, and see +what she could of the performance. +</P> + +<P> +She was quite certain that if her presence were known to Loring he +would stop whatever he was doing until she had been provided with a +seat which he thought suitable for her, for he had made a point of her +being properly seated when he gave the invitations. Therefore, being +equally desirous of not disturbing the performance and of not being +herself conspicuous, she sat behind two rather large men, where she +could see the stage perfectly well, but where she herself would not be +likely to be seen. +</P> + +<P> +In a few moments the curtain rose, and Loring came forward, carrying a +small, light table, which he placed near the front of the stage, and +for a moment stood quietly by it. Edith noticed upon his face the +expression of uncertainty and anxiety which had not yet left it. +Standing by the side of the table, and speaking very slowly, but so +clearly that his words could be heard distinctly in all parts of the +room, he began some introductory remarks regarding the second part of +his performance. +</P> + +<P> +"The extraordinary, and I may say marvellous, thing which I am about to +show you," he said, "is known among East Indian magicians as the magic +egg. The exhibition is a very uncommon one, and has seldom been seen +by Americans or Europeans, and it was by a piece of rare good fortune +that I became possessed of the appliances necessary for this +exhibition. They are indeed very few and simple, but never before, to +the best of my knowledge and belief, have they been seen outside of +India. +</P> + +<P> +"I will now get the little box which contains the articles necessary +for this magical performance, and I will say that if I had time to tell +you of the strange and amazing adventure which resulted in my +possession of this box, I am sure you would be as much interested in +that as I expect you to be in the contents of the box. But in order +that none of you may think this is an ordinary trick, executed by means +of concealed traps or doors, I wish you to take particular notice of +this table, which is, as you see, a plain, unpainted pine table, with +nothing but a flat top, and four straight legs at the corners. You can +see under and around it, and it gives no opportunity to conceal +anything." Then, standing for a few moments as if he had something else +to say, he turned and stepped toward one of the wings. +</P> + +<P> +Edith was troubled as she looked at her lover during these remarks. +Her interest was great, greater, indeed, than that of the people about +her, but it was not a pleasant interest. As Loring stopped speaking, +and looked about him, there was a momentary flush on his face. She +knew this was caused by excitement, and she was pale from the same +cause. +</P> + +<P> +Very soon Loring came forward, and stood by the table. +</P> + +<P> +"Here is the box," he said, "of which I spoke, and as I hold it up I +think you all can see it. It is not large, being certainly not more +than twelve inches in length and two deep, but it contains some very +wonderful things. The outside of this box is covered with delicate +engraving and carving which you cannot see, and these marks and lines +have, I think, some magical meaning, but I do not know what it is. I +will now open the box and show you what is inside. The first thing I +take out is this little stick, not thicker than a lead-pencil, but +somewhat longer, as you see. This is a magical wand, and is covered +with inscriptions of the same character as those on the outside of the +box. The next thing is this little red bag, well filled, as you see, +which I shall put on the table, for I shall not yet need it. +</P> + +<P> +"Now I take out a piece of cloth which is folded into a very small +compass, but as I unfold it you will perceive that it is more than a +foot square, and is covered with embroidery. All those strange lines +and figures in gold and red, which you can plainly see on the cloth as +I hold it up, are also characters in the same magic language as those +on the box and wand. I will now spread the cloth on the table, and +then take out the only remaining thing in the box, and this is nothing +in the world but an egg—a simple, ordinary hen's egg, as you all see +as I hold it up. It may be a trifle larger than an ordinary egg, but +then, after all, it is nothing but a common egg—that is, in +appearance. In reality it is a good deal more. +</P> + +<P> +"Now I will begin the performance." And as he stood by the back of the +table, over which he had been slightly bending, and threw his eyes over +the audience, his voice was stronger, and his face had lost all its +pallor. He was evidently warming up with his subject. +</P> + +<P> +"I now take up this wand," he said, "which, while I hold it, gives me +power to produce the phenomena which you are about to behold. You may +not all believe that there is any magic whatever about this little +performance, and that it is all a bit of machinery; but whatever you +may think about it, you shall see what you shall see. +</P> + +<P> +"Now with this wand I gently touch this egg which is lying on the +square of cloth. I do not believe you can see what has happened to +this egg, but I will tell you. There is a little line, like a hair, +entirely around it. Now that line has become a crack. Now you can see +it, I know. It grows wider and wider! Look! The shell of the egg is +separating in the middle. The whole egg slightly moves. Do you notice +that? Now you can see something yellow showing itself between the two +parts of the shell. See! It is moving a good deal, and the two halves +of the shell are separating more and more. And now out tumbles this +queer little object. Do you see what it is? It is a poor, weak, +little chick, not able to stand, but alive—alive! You can all +perceive that it is alive. Now you can see that it is standing on its +feet, feebly enough, but still standing. +</P> + +<P> +"Behold, it takes a few steps! You cannot doubt that it is alive, and +came out of that egg. It is beginning to walk about over the cloth. +Do you notice that it is picking the embroidery? Now, little chick, I +will give you something to eat. This little red bag contains grain, a +magical grain, with which I shall feed the chicken. You must excuse my +awkwardness in opening the bag, as I still hold the wand; but this +little stick I must not drop. See, little chick, there are some +grains! They look like rice, but, in fact, I have no idea what they +are. But he knows, he knows! Look at him! See how he picks it up! +There! He has swallowed one, two, three. That will do, little chick, +for a first meal. +</P> + +<P> +"The grain seems to have strengthened him already, for see how lively +he is, and how his yellow down stands out on him, so puffy and warm! +You are looking for some more grain, are you? Well, you cannot have it +just yet, and keep away from those pieces of eggshell, which, by the +way, I will put back into the box. Now, sir, try to avoid the edge of +the table, and, to quiet you, I will give you a little tap on the back +with my wand. Now, then, please observe closely. The down which just +now covered him has almost gone. He is really a good deal bigger, and +ever so much uglier. See the little pin-feathers sticking out over +him! Some spots here and there are almost bare, but he is ever so much +more active. Ha! Listen to that! He is so strong that you can hear +his beak as he pecks at the table. He is actually growing bigger and +bigger before our very eyes! See that funny little tail, how it begins +to stick up, and quills are showing at the end of his wings. +</P> + +<P> +"Another tap, and a few more grains. Careful, sir! Don't tear the +cloth! See how rapidly he grows! He is fairly covered with feathers, +red and black, with a tip of yellow in front. You could hardly get +that fellow into an ostrich egg! Now, then, what do you think of him? +He is big enough for a broiler, though I don't think any one would want +to take him for that purpose. Some more grain, and another tap from my +wand. See! He does not mind the little stick, for he has been used to +it from his very birth. Now, then, he is what you would call a good +half-grown chick. Rather more than half grown, I should say. Do you +notice his tail? There is no mistaking him for a pullet. The long +feathers are beginning to curl over already. He must have a little +more grain. Look out, sir, or you will be off the table! Come back +here! This table is too small for him, but if he were on the floor you +could not see him so well. +</P> + +<P> +"Another tap. Now see that comb on the top of his head; you scarcely +noticed it before, and now it is bright red. And see his spurs +beginning to show—on good thick legs, too. There is a fine young +fellow for you! Look how he jerks his head from side to side, like the +young prince of a poultry-yard, as he well deserves to be!" +</P> + +<P> +The attentive interest which had at first characterized the audience +now changed to excited admiration and amazement. Some leaned forward +with mouths wide open. Others stood up so that they could see better. +Ejaculations of astonishment and wonder were heard on every side, and a +more thoroughly fascinated and absorbed audience was never seen. +</P> + +<P> +"Now, my friends," Loring continued, "I will give this handsome fowl +another tap. Behold the result—a noble, full-grown cock! Behold his +spurs! They are nearly an inch long! See, there is a comb for you! +And what a magnificent tail of green and black, contrasting so finely +with the deep red of the rest of his body! Well, sir, you are truly +too big for this table. As I cannot give you more room, I will set you +up higher. Move over a little, and I will set this chair on the table. +There! Upon the seat! That's right, but don't stop. There is the +back, which is higher yet! Up with you! Ha! There, he nearly upset +the chair, but I will hold it. See! He has turned around. Now, then, +look at him. See his wings as he flaps them! He could fly with such +wings. Look at him! See that swelling breast! Ha, ha! Listen! Did +you ever hear a crow like that? It fairly rings through the house. +Yes, I knew it! There is another!" +</P> + +<P> +At this point the people in the house were in a state of wild +excitement. Nearly all of them were on their feet, and they were in +such a condition of frantic enthusiasm that Loring was afraid some of +them might make a run for the stage. +</P> + +<P> +"Come, sir," cried Loring, now almost shouting, "that will do. You +have shown us the strength of your lungs. Jump down on the seat of the +chair; now on the table. There, I will take away the chair, and you +can stand for a moment on the table and let our friends look at you; +but only for a moment. Take that tap on your back. Now do you see any +difference? Perhaps you may not, but I do. Yes, I believe you all do. +He is not the big fellow he was a minute ago. He is really +smaller—only a fine cockerel. A nice tail that, but with none of the +noble sweep that it had a minute ago. No, don't try to get off the +table. You can't escape my wand. Another tap. Behold a half-grown +chicken, good to eat, but with not a crow in him. Hungry, are you? +But you need not pick at the table that way. You get no more grain, +but only this little tap. Ha, ha! What are you coming to? There is a +chicken barely feathered enough for us to tell what color he is going +to be. +</P> + +<P> +"Another tap will take still more of the conceit out of him. Look at +him! There are his pin-feathers, and his bare spots. Don't try to get +away; I can easily tap you again. Now then. Here is a lovely little +chick, fluffy with yellow down. He is active enough, but I shall quiet +him. One tap, and now what do you see? A poor, feeble chicken, +scarcely able to stand, with his down all packed close to him as if he +had been out in the rain. Ah, little chick, I will take the two halves +of the egg-shell from which you came, and put them on each side of you. +Come, now get in! I close them up. You are lost to view. There is +nothing to be seen but a crack around the shell! Now it has gone! +There, my friends; as I hold it on high, behold the magic egg, exactly +as it was when I first took it out of the box, into which I will place +it again, with the cloth and the wand and the little red bag, and shut +it up with a snap. I will let you take one more look at this box +before I put it away behind the scenes. Are you satisfied with what I +have shown you? Do you think it is really as wonderful as you supposed +it would be?" +</P> + +<P> +At these words the whole audience burst into riotous applause, during +which Loring disappeared, but he was back in a moment. +</P> + +<P> +"Thank you!" he cried, bowing low, and waving his arms before him in +the manner of an Eastern magician making a salaam. From side to side +he turned, bowing and thanking, and then, with a hearty "Good-by to +you; good-by to you all!" he stepped back and let down the curtain. +</P> + +<P> +For some moments the audience remained in their seats as if they were +expecting something more, and then they rose quietly and began to +disperse. Most of them were acquainted with one another, and there was +a good deal of greeting and talking as they went out of the theatre. +</P> + +<P> +When Loring was sure the last person had departed, he turned down the +lights, locked the door, and gave the key to the steward of the club. +</P> + +<P> +He walked to his home a happy man. His exhibition had been a perfect +success, with not a break or a flaw in it from beginning to end. +</P> + +<P> +"I feel," thought the young man, as he strode along, "as if I could fly +to the top of that steeple, and flap and crow until all the world heard +me." +</P> + +<P> +That evening, as was his daily custom, Herbert Loring called upon Miss +Starr. He found the young lady in the library. +</P> + +<P> +"I came in here," she said, "because I have a good deal to talk to you +about, and I do not want interruptions." +</P> + +<P> +With this arrangement the young man expressed his entire satisfaction, +and immediately began to inquire the cause of her absence from his +exhibition in the afternoon. +</P> + +<P> +"But I was there," said Edith. "You did not see me, but I was there. +Mother had a headache, and I went by myself." +</P> + +<P> +"You were there!" exclaimed Loring, almost starting from his chair. "I +don't understand. You were not in your seat." +</P> + +<P> +No," answered Edith. "I was on the very back row of seats.<BR> +You could not see me, and I did not wish you to see me." +</P> + +<P> +"Edith!" exclaimed Loring, rising to his feet and leaning over the +library table, which was between them. "When did you come? How much +of the performance did you see?" +</P> + +<P> +"I was late," she said. "I did not arrive until after the fireworks, +or whatever they were." +</P> + +<P> +For a moment Loring was silent, as if he did not understand the +situation. +</P> + +<P> +"Fireworks!" he said. "How did you know there had been fireworks?" +</P> + +<P> +"I heard the people talking of them as they left the theatre," she +answered. +</P> + +<P> +"And what did they say?" he inquired quickly. +</P> + +<P> +"They seemed to like them very well," she replied, "but I do not think +they were quite satisfied. From what I heard some persons say, I +inferred that they thought it was not very much of a show to which you +had invited them." +</P> + +<P> +Again Loring stood in thought, looking down at the table. But before +he could speak again, Edith sprang to her feet. +</P> + +<P> +"Herbert Loring," she cried, "what does all this mean? I was there +during the whole of the exhibition of what you called the magic egg. I +saw all those people wild with excitement at the wonderful sight of the +chicken that came out of the egg, and grew to full size, and then +dwindled down again, and went back into the egg, and, Herbert, there +was no egg, and there was no little box, and there was no wand, and no +embroidered cloth, and there was no red bag, nor any little chick, and +there was no full-grown fowl, and there was no chair that you put on +the table! There was nothing, absolutely nothing, but you and that +table! Even the table was not what you said it was. It was not an +unpainted pine table with four straight legs. It was a table of dark +polished wood, and it stood on a single post with feet. There was +nothing there that you said was there. Everything was a sham and a +delusion; every word you spoke was untrue. And yet everybody in that +theatre, excepting you and me, saw all the things that you said were on +the stage. I know they saw them all, for I was with the people, and +heard them, and saw them, and at times I fairly felt the thrill of +enthusiasm which possessed them as they glared at the miracles and +wonders you said were happening." +</P> + +<P> +Loring smiled. "Sit down, my dear Edith," he said. "You are excited, +and there is not the slightest cause for it. I will explain the whole +affair to you. It is simple enough. You know that study is the great +object of my life. I study all sorts of things; and just now I am +greatly interested in hypnotism. The subject has become fascinating to +me. I have made a great many successful trials of my power, and the +affair of this afternoon was nothing but a trial of my powers on a more +extensive scale than anything I have yet attempted. I wanted to see if +it were possible for me to hypnotize a considerable number of people +without any one suspecting what I intended to do. The result was a +success. I hypnotized all those people by means of the first part of +my performance, which consisted of some combinations of colored glass +with lights thrown upon them. They revolved, and looked like +fireworks, and were strung on a wire high up on the stage. +</P> + +<P> +"I kept up the glittering and dazzling show—which was well worth +seeing, I can assure you—until the people had been straining their +eyes upward for almost half an hour. And this sort of thing—I will +tell you if you do not know it—is one of the methods of producing +hypnotic sleep. +</P> + +<P> +"There was no one present who was not an impressionable subject, for I +was very careful in sending out my invitations, and when I became +almost certain that my audience was thoroughly hypnotized, I stopped +the show and began the real exhibition, which was not really for their +benefit, but for mine. +</P> + +<P> +"Of course, I was dreadfully anxious for fear I had not succeeded +entirely, and that there might be at least some one person who had not +succumbed to the hypnotic influences, and so I tested the matter by +bringing out that table and telling them it was something it was not. +If I had had any reason for supposing that some of the audience saw the +table as it really was, I had an explanation ready, and I could have +retired from my position without any one supposing that I had intended +making hypnotic experiments. The rest of the exhibition would have +been some things that any one could see, and as soon as possible I +would have released from their spell those who were hypnotized. But +when I became positively assured that every one saw a light pine table +with four straight legs, I confidently went on with the performances of +the magic egg." +</P> + +<P> +Edith Starr was still standing by the library table. She had not +heeded Loring's advice to sit down, and she was trembling with emotion. +</P> + +<P> +"Herbert Loring," she said, "you invited my mother and me to that +exhibition. You gave us tickets for front seats, where we would be +certain to be hypnotized if your experiment succeeded, and you would +have made us see that false show, which faded from those people's minds +as soon as they recovered from the spell, for as they went away they +were talking only of the fireworks, and not one of them mentioned a +magic egg, or a chicken, or anything of the kind. Answer me this: did +you not intend that I should come and be put under that spell?" +</P> + +<P> +Loring smiled. "Yes," he said, "of course I did. But then your case +would have been different from that of the other spectators: I should +have explained the whole thing to you, and I am sure we would have had +a great deal of pleasure, and profit too, in discussing your +experiences. The subject is extremely—" +</P> + +<P> +"Explain to me!" she cried. "You would not have dared to do it! I do +not know how brave you may be, but I know you would not have had the +courage to come here and tell me that you had taken away my reason and +my judgment, as you took them away from all those people, and that you +had made me a mere tool of your will—glaring and panting with +excitement at the wonderful things you told me to see where nothing +existed. I have nothing to say about the others. They can speak for +themselves if they ever come to know what you did to them. I speak for +myself. I stood up with the rest of the people. I gazed with all my +power, and over and over again I asked myself if it could be possible +that anything was the matter with my eyes or my brain, and if I could +be the only person there who could not see the marvellous spectacle +that you were describing. But now I know that nothing was real, not +even the little pine table—not even the man!" +</P> + +<P> +"Not even me!" exclaimed Loring. "Surely I was real enough!" +</P> + +<P> +"On that stage, yes," she said. "But you there proved you were not the +Herbert Loring to whom I promised myself. He was an unreal being. If +he had existed he would not have been a man who would have brought me +to that public place, all ignorant of his intentions, to cloud my +perceptions, to subject my intellect to his own, and make me believe a +lie. If a man should treat me in that way once he would treat me so at +other times, and in other ways, if he had the chance. You have treated +me in the past as to-day you treated those people who glared at the +magic egg. In the days gone by you made me see an unreal man, but you +will never do it again! Good-by." +</P> + +<P> +"Edith," cried Loring, "you don't—" +</P> + +<P> +But she had disappeared through a side door, and he never spoke to her +again. +</P> + +<P> +Walking home through the dimly lighted streets, Loring involuntarily +spoke aloud. +</P> + +<P> +"And this," he said, "is what came out of the magic egg!" +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<A NAME="chap02"></A> +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +"HIS WIFE'S DECEASED SISTER" +</H3> + +<P> +It is now five years since an event occurred which so colored my life, +or rather so changed some of its original colors, that I have thought +it well to write an account of it, deeming that its lessons may be of +advantage to persons whose situations in life are similar to my own. +</P> + +<P> +When I was quite a young man I adopted literature as a profession, and +having passed through the necessary preparatory grades, I found myself, +after a good many years of hard and often unremunerative work, in +possession of what might be called a fair literary practice. My +articles, grave, gay, practical, or fanciful, had come to be considered +with a favor by the editors of the various periodicals for which I +wrote, on which I found in time I could rely with a very comfortable +certainty. My productions created no enthusiasm in the reading public; +they gave me no great reputation or very valuable pecuniary return; but +they were always accepted, and my receipts from them, at the time to +which I have referred, were as regular and reliable as a salary, and +quite sufficient to give me more than a comfortable support. +</P> + +<P> +It was at this time I married. I had been engaged for more than a +year, but had not been willing to assume the support of a wife until I +felt that my pecuniary position was so assured that I could do so with +full satisfaction to my own conscience. There was now no doubt in +regard to this position, either in my mind or in that of my wife. I +worked with great steadiness and regularity, I knew exactly where to +place the productions of my pen, and could calculate, with a fair +degree of accuracy, the sums I should receive for them. We were by no +means rich, but we had enough, and were thoroughly satisfied and +content. +</P> + +<P> +Those of my readers who are married will have no difficulty in +remembering the peculiar ecstasy of the first weeks of their wedded +life. It is then that the flowers of this world bloom brightest; that +its sun is the most genial; that its clouds are the scarcest; that its +fruit is the most delicious; that the air is the most balmy; that its +cigars are of the highest flavor; that the warmth and radiance of early +matrimonial felicity so rarefy the intellectual atmosphere that the +soul mounts higher, and enjoys a wider prospect, than ever before. +</P> + +<P> +These experiences were mine. The plain claret of my mind was changed +to sparkling champagne, and at the very height of its effervescence I +wrote a story. The happy thought that then struck me for a tale was of +a very peculiar character, and it interested me so much that I went to +work at it with great delight and enthusiasm, and finished it in a +comparatively short time. The title of the story was "His Wife's +Deceased Sister," and when I read it to Hypatia she was delighted with +it, and at times was so affected by its pathos that her uncontrollable +emotion caused a sympathetic dimness in my eyes which prevented my +seeing the words I had written. When the reading was ended and my wife +had dried her eyes, she turned to me and said, "This story will make +your fortune. There has been nothing so pathetic since Lamartine's +`History of a Servant Girl.'" +</P> + +<P> +As soon as possible the next day I sent my story to the editor of the +periodical for which I wrote most frequently, and in which my best +productions generally appeared. In a few days I had a letter from the +editor, in which he praised my story as he had never before praised +anything from my pen. It had interested and charmed, he said, not only +himself, but all his associates in the office. Even old Gibson, who +never cared to read anything until it was in proof, and who never +praised anything which had not a joke in it, was induced by the example +of the others to read this manuscript, and shed, as he asserted, the +first tears that had come from his eyes since his final paternal +castigation some forty years before. The story would appear, the +editor assured me, as soon as he could possibly find room for it. +</P> + +<P> +f anything could make our skies more genial, our flowers<BR> +brighter, and the flavor of our fruit and cigars more delicious, it was +a letter like this. And when, in a very short time, the story was +published, we found that the reading public was inclined to receive it +with as much sympathetic interest and favor as had been shown to it by +the editors. My personal friends soon began to express enthusiastic +opinions upon it. It was highly praised in many of the leading +newspapers, and, altogether, it was a great literary success. I am not +inclined to be vain of my writings, and, in general, my wife tells me, +I think too little of them. But I did feel a good deal of pride and +satisfaction in the success of "His Wife's Deceased Sister." If it did +not make my fortune, as my wife asserted it would, it certainly would +help me very much in my literary career. +</P> + +<P> +In less than a month from the writing of this story, something very +unusual and unexpected happened to me. A manuscript was returned by +the editor of the periodical in which "His Wife's Deceased Sister" had +appeared. +</P> + +<BR> + +<P> +"It is a good story," he wrote, "but not equal to what you have just +done. You have made a great hit, and it would not do to interfere with +the reputation you have gained by publishing anything inferior to `His +Wife's Deceased Sister,' which has had such a deserved success." +</P> + +<BR> + +<P> +I was so unaccustomed to having my work thrown back on my hands that I +think I must have turned a little pale when I read the letter. I said +nothing of the matter to my wife, for it would be foolish to drop such +grains of sand as this into the smoothly oiled machinery of our +domestic felicity, but I immediately sent the story to another editor. +I am not able to express the astonishment I felt when, in the course of +a week, it was sent back to me. The tone of the note accompanying it +indicated a somewhat injured feeling on the part of the editor. +</P> + +<BR> + +<P> +"I am reluctant," he said, "to decline a manuscript from you; but you +know very well that if you sent me anything like `His Wife's Deceased +Sister' it would be most promptly accepted." +</P> + +<P> +I now felt obliged to speak of the affair to my wife, who was quite as +much surprised, though, perhaps, not quite as much shocked, as I had +been. +</P> + +<P> +"Let us read the story again," she said, "and see what is the matter +with it." When we had finished its perusal, Hypatia remarked: "It is +quite as good as many of the stories you have had printed, and I think +it very interesting, although, of course, it is not equal to `His +Wife's Deceased Sister.'" +</P> + +<P> +"Of course not," said I; "that was an inspiration that I cannot expect +every day. But there must be something wrong about this last story +which we do not perceive. Perhaps my recent success may have made me a +little careless in writing it." +</P> + +<P> +"I don't believe that," said Hypatia. +</P> + +<P> +"At any rate," I continued, "I will lay it aside, and will go to work +on a new one." +</P> + +<P> +In due course of time I had another manuscript finished, and I sent it +to my favorite periodical. It was retained some weeks, and then came +back to me. +</P> + +<P> +"It will never do," the editor wrote, quite warmly, "for you to go +backward. The demand for the number containing `His Wife's Deceased +Sister' still continues, and we do not intend to let you disappoint +that great body of readers who would be so eager to see another number +containing one of your stories." +</P> + +<BR> + +<P> +I sent this manuscript to four other periodicals, and from each of them +it was returned with remarks to the effect that, although it was not a +bad story in itself, it was not what they would expect from the author +of "His Wife's Deceased Sister." +</P> + +<P> +The editor of a Western magazine wrote to me for a story to be +published in a special number which he would issue for the holidays. I +wrote him one of the character and length he desired, and sent it to +him. By return mail it came back to me. +</P> + +<BR> + +<P> +"I had hoped," the editor wrote, "when I asked for a story from your +pen, to receive something like `His Wife's Deceased Sister,' and I must +own that I am very much disappointed." +</P> + +<BR> + +<P> +I was so filled with anger when I read this note that I openly +objurgated "His Wife's Deceased Sister." "You must excuse me," I said +to my astonished wife, "for expressing myself thus in your presence, +but that confounded story will be the ruin of me yet. Until it is +forgotten nobody will ever take anything I write." +</P> + +<P> +"And you cannot expect it ever to be forgotten," said Hypatia, with +tears in her eyes. +</P> + +<P> +It is needless for me to detail my literary efforts in the course of +the next few months. The ideas of the editors with whom my principal +business had been done, in regard to my literary ability, had been so +raised by my unfortunate story of "His Wife's Deceased Sister" that I +found it was of no use to send them anything of lesser merit. And as +to the other journals which I tried, they evidently considered it an +insult for me to send them matter inferior to that by which my +reputation had lately risen. The fact was that my successful story had +ruined me. My income was at an end, and want actually stared me in the +face; and I must admit that I did not like the expression of its +countenance. It was of no use for me to try to write another story +like "His Wife's Deceased Sister." I could not get married every time +I began a new manuscript, and it was the exaltation of mind caused by +my wedded felicity which produced that story. +</P> + +<P> +"It's perfectly dreadful!" said my wife. "If I had had a sister, and +she had died, I would have thought it was my fault." +</P> + +<P> +"It could not be your fault," I answered, "and I do not think it was +mine. I had no intention of deceiving anybody into the belief that I +could do that sort of thing every time, and it ought not to be expected +of me. Suppose Raphael's patrons had tried to keep him screwed up to +the pitch of the Sistine Madonna, and had refused to buy anything which +was not as good as that. In that case I think he would have occupied a +much earlier and narrower grave than the one on which Mr. Morris Moore +hangs his funeral decorations." +</P> + +<P> +"But, my dear," said Hypatia, who was posted on such subjects, "the +Sistine Madonna was one of his latest paintings." +</P> + +<P> +"Very true," said I. "But if he had married as I did, he would have +painted it earlier." +</P> + +<P> +I was walking homeward one afternoon about this time, when I met +Barbel, a man I had known well in my early literary career. He was now +about fifty years of age, but looked older. His hair and beard were +quite gray, and his clothes, which were of the same general hue, gave +me the idea that they, like his hair, had originally been black. Age +is very hard on a man's external appointments. Barbel had an air of +having been to let for a long time, and quite out of repair. But there +was a kindly gleam in his eye, and he welcomed me cordially. +</P> + +<P> +"Why, what is the matter, old fellow?" said he. "I never saw you look +so woe-begone." +</P> + +<P> +I had no reason to conceal anything from Barbel. In my younger days he +had been of great use to me, and he had a right to know the state of my +affairs. I laid the whole case plainly before him. +</P> + +<P> +"Look here," he said, when I had finished; "come with me to my room; I +have something I would like to say to you there." +</P> + +<P> +I followed Barbel to his room. It was at the top of a very dirty and +well-worn house, which stood in a narrow and lumpy street, into which +few vehicles ever penetrated, except the ash and garbage-carts, and the +rickety wagons of the venders of stale vegetables. +</P> + +<P> +"This is not exactly a fashionable promenade," said Barbel, as we +approached the house, "but in some respects it reminds me of the +streets in Italian towns, where the palaces lean over toward each other +in such a friendly way." +</P> + +<P> +Barbel's room was, to my mind, rather more doleful than the street. It +was dark, it was dusty, and cobwebs hung from every corner. The few +chairs upon the floor and the books upon a greasy table seemed to be +afflicted with some dorsal epidemic, for their backs were either gone +or broken. A little bedstead in the corner was covered with a spread +made of New York "Heralds" with their edges pasted together. +</P> + +<P> +"There is nothing better," said Barbel, noticing my glance toward this +novel counterpane, "for a bed-covering than newspapers; they keep you +as warm as a blanket, and are much lighter. I used to use `Tribunes,' +but they rattled too much." +</P> + +<P> +The only part of the room which was well lighted was one end near the +solitary window. Here, upon a table with a spliced leg, stood a little +grindstone. +</P> + +<P> +"At the other end of the room," said Barbel, "is my cook-stove, which +you can't see unless I light the candle in the bottle which stands by +it. But if you don't care particularly to examine it, I won't go to +the expense of lighting up. You might pick up a good many odd pieces +of bric-a-brac, around here, if you chose to strike a match and +investigate. But I would not advise you to do so. It would pay better +to throw the things out of the window than to carry them down-stairs. +The particular piece of indoor decoration to which I wish to call your +attention is this." And he led me to a little wooden frame which hung +against the wall near the window. Behind a dusty piece of glass it +held what appeared to be a leaf from a small magazine or journal. +"There," said he, "you see a page from the `Grasshopper,' a humorous +paper which flourished in this city some half-dozen years ago. I used +to write regularly for that paper, as you may remember." +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, yes, indeed!" I exclaimed. "And I shall never forget your +`Conundrum of the Anvil' which appeared in it. How often have I +laughed at that most wonderful conceit, and how often have I put it to +my friends!" +</P> + +<P> +Barbel gazed at me silently for a moment, and then he pointed to the +frame. "That printed page," he said solemnly, "contains the `Conundrum +of the Anvil.' I hang it there so that I can see it while I work. +That conundrum ruined me. It was the last thing I wrote for the +`Grasshopper.' How I ever came to imagine it, I cannot tell. It is +one of those things which occur to a man but once in a lifetime. After +the wild shout of delight with which the public greeted that conundrum, +my subsequent efforts met with hoots of derision. The `Grasshopper' +turned its hind legs upon me. I sank from bad to worse,—much +worse,—until at last I found myself reduced to my present occupation, +which is that of grinding points on pins. By this I procure my bread, +coffee, and tobacco, and sometimes potatoes and meat. One day while I +was hard at work, an organ-grinder came into the street below. He +played the serenade from `Trovatore' and the familiar notes brought +back visions of old days and old delights, when the successful writer +wore good clothes and sat at operas, when he looked into sweet eyes and +talked of Italian airs, when his future appeared all a succession of +bright scenery and joyous acts, without any provision for a +drop-curtain. And as my ear listened, and my mind wandered in this +happy retrospect, my every faculty seemed exalted, and, without any +thought upon the matter, I ground points upon my pins so fine, so +regular, and so smooth that they would have pierced with ease the +leather of a boot, or slipped, without abrasion, among the finest +threads of rare old lace. When the organ stopped, and I fell back into +my real world of cobwebs and mustiness, I gazed upon the pins I had +just ground, and, without a moment's hesitation, I threw them into the +street, and reported the lot as spoiled. This cost me a little money, +but it saved me my livelihood." +</P> + +<P> +After a few moments of silence, Barbel resumed: +</P> + +<P> +"I have no more to say to you, my young friend. All I want you to do +is to look upon that framed conundrum, then upon this grindstone, and +then to go home and reflect. As for me, I have a gross of pins to +grind before the sun goes down." +</P> + +<P> +I cannot say that my depression of mind was at all relieved by what I +had seen and heard. I had lost sight of Barbel for some years, and I +had supposed him still floating on the sun-sparkling stream of +prosperity where I had last seen him. It was a great shock to me to +find him in such a condition of poverty and squalor, and to see a man +who had originated the "Conundrum of the Anvil" reduced to the +soul-depressing occupation of grinding pin-points. As I walked and +thought, the dreadful picture of a totally eclipsed future arose before +my mind. The moral of Barbel sank deep into my heart. +</P> + +<P> +When I reached home I told my wife the story of my friend Barbel. She +listened with a sad and eager interest. +</P> + +<P> +"I am afraid," she said, "if our fortunes do not quickly mend, that we +shall have to buy two little grindstones. You know I could help you at +that sort of thing." +</P> + +<P> +For a long time we sat together and talked, and devised many plans for +the future. I did not think it necessary yet for me to look out for a +pin contract; but I must find some way of making money, or we should +starve to death. Of course, the first thing that suggested itself was +the possibility of finding some other business. But, apart from the +difficulty of immediately obtaining remunerative work in occupations to +which I had not been trained, I felt a great and natural reluctance to +give up a profession for which I had carefully prepared myself, and +which I had adopted as my life-work. It would be very hard for me to +lay down my pen forever, and to close the top of my inkstand upon all +the bright and happy fancies which I had seen mirrored in its tranquil +pool. We talked and pondered the rest of that day and a good deal of +the night, but we came to no conclusion as to what it would be best for +us to do. +</P> + +<P> +The next day I determined to go and call upon the editor of the journal +for which, in happier days, before the blight of "His Wife's Deceased +Sister" rested upon me, I used most frequently to write, and, having +frankly explained my condition to him, to ask his advice. The editor +was a good man, and had always been my friend. He listened with great +attention to what I told him, and evidently sympathized with me in my +trouble. +</P> + +<P> +"As we have written to you," he said, "the only reason why we did not +accept the manuscripts you sent us was that they would have +disappointed the high hopes that the public had formed in regard to +you. We have had letter after letter asking when we were going to +publish another story like `His Wife's Deceased Sister.' We felt, and +we still feel, that it would be wrong to allow you to destroy the fair +fabric which you yourself have raised. But," he added, with a kind +smile, "I see very plainly that your well-deserved reputation will be +of little advantage to you if you should starve at the moment that its +genial beams are, so to speak, lighting you up." +</P> + +<P> +"Its beams are not genial," I answered. "They have scorched and +withered me." +</P> + +<P> +"How would you like," said the editor, after a short reflection, "to +allow us to publish the stories you have recently written under some +other name than your own? That would satisfy us and the public, would +put money in your pocket, and would not interfere with your reputation." +</P> + +<P> +Joyfully I seized the noble fellow by the hand, and instantly accepted +his proposition. "Of course," said I, "a reputation is a very good +thing; but no reputation can take the place of food, clothes, and a +house to live in, and I gladly agree to sink my over-illumined name +into oblivion, and to appear before the public as a new and unknown +writer." +</P> + +<P> +"I hope that need not be for long," he said, "for I feel sure that you +will yet write stories as good as `His Wife's Deceased Sister.'" +</P> + +<P> +All the manuscripts I had on hand I now sent to my good friend the +editor, and in due and proper order they appeared in his journal under +the name of John Darmstadt, which I had selected as a substitute for my +own, permanently disabled. I made a similar arrangement with other +editors, and John Darmstadt received the credit of everything that +proceeded from my pen. Our circumstances now became very comfortable, +and occasionally we even allowed ourselves to indulge in little dreams +of prosperity. +</P> + +<P> +Time passed on very pleasantly. One year, another, and then a little +son was born to us. It is often difficult, I believe, for thoughtful +persons to decide whether the beginning of their conjugal career, or +the earliest weeks in the life of their first-born, be the happiest and +proudest period of their existence. For myself I can only say that the +same exaltation of mind, the same rarefication of idea and invention, +which succeeded upon my wedding day came upon me now. As then, my +ecstatic emotions crystallized themselves into a motive for a story, +and without delay I set myself to work upon it. My boy was about six +weeks old when the manuscript was finished, and one evening, as we sat +before a comfortable fire in our sitting-room, with the curtains drawn, +and the soft lamp lighted, and the baby sleeping soundly in the +adjoining chamber, I read the story to my wife. +</P> + +<P> +When I had finished, my wife arose and threw herself into my arms. "I +was never so proud of you," she said, her glad eyes sparkling, "as I am +at this moment. That is a wonderful story! It is, indeed I am sure it +is, just as good as `His Wife's Deceased Sister.'" +</P> + +<P> +As she spoke these words, a sudden and chilling sensation crept over us +both. All her warmth and fervor, and the proud and happy glow +engendered within me by this praise and appreciation from one I loved, +vanished in an instant. We stepped apart, and gazed upon each other +with pallid faces. In the same moment the terrible truth had flashed +upon us both. This story WAS as good as "His Wife's Deceased Sister"! +</P> + +<P> +We stood silent. The exceptional lot of Barbel's super-pointed pins +seemed to pierce our very souls. A dreadful vision rose before me of +an impending fall and crash, in which our domestic happiness should +vanish, and our prospects for our boy be wrecked, just as we had began +to build them up. +</P> + +<P> +My wife approached me, and took my hand in hers, which was as cold as +ice. "Be strong and firm," she said. "A great danger threatens us, +but you must brace yourself against it. Be strong and firm." +</P> + +<P> +I pressed her hand, and we said no more that night. +</P> + +<P> +The next day I took the manuscript I had just written, and carefully +infolded it in stout wrapping-paper. Then I went to a neighboring +grocery store and bought a small, strong, tin box, originally intended +for biscuit, with a cover that fitted tightly. In this I placed my +manuscript, and then I took the box to a tinsmith and had the top +fastened on with hard solder. When I went home I ascended into the +garret and brought down to my study a ship's cash-box, which had once +belonged to one of my family who was a sea-captain. This box was very +heavy, and firmly bound with iron, and was secured by two massive +locks. Calling my wife, I told her of the contents of the tin case, +which I then placed in the box, and having shut down the heavy lid, I +doubly locked it. +</P> + +<P> +"This key," said I, putting it in my pocket, "I shall throw into the +river when I go out this afternoon." +</P> + +<P> +My wife watched me eagerly, with a pallid and firm-set countenance, but +upon which I could see the faint glimmer of returning happiness. +</P> + +<P> +"Wouldn't it be well," she said, "to secure it still further by +sealing-wax and pieces of tape?" +</P> + +<P> +"No," said I. "I do not believe that any one will attempt to tamper +with our prosperity. And now, my dear," I continued in an impressive +voice, "no one but you, and, in the course of time, our son, shall know +that this manuscript exists. When I am dead, those who survive me may, +if they see fit, cause this box to be split open and the story +published. The reputation it may give my name cannot harm me then." +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<A NAME="chap03"></A> +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +THE WIDOW'S CRUISE +</H3> + +<P> +The Widow Ducket lived in a small village about ten miles from the New +Jersey sea-coast. In this village she was born, here she had married +and buried her husband, and here she expected somebody to bury her; but +she was in no hurry for this, for she had scarcely reached middle age. +She was a tall woman with no apparent fat in her composition, and full +of activity, both muscular and mental. +</P> + +<P> +She rose at six o'clock in the morning, cooked breakfast, set the +table, washed the dishes when the meal was over, milked, churned, +swept, washed, ironed, worked in her little garden, attended to the +flowers in the front yard, and in the afternoon knitted and quilted and +sewed, and after tea she either went to see her neighbors or had them +come to see her. When it was really dark she lighted the lamp in her +parlor and read for an hour, and if it happened to be one of Miss Mary +Wilkins's books that she read she expressed doubts as to the realism of +the characters therein described. +</P> + +<P> +These doubts she expressed to Dorcas Networthy, who was a small, plump +woman, with a solemn face, who had lived with the widow for many years +and who had become her devoted disciple. Whatever the widow did, that +also did Dorcas—not so well, for her heart told her she could never +expect to do that, but with a yearning anxiety to do everything as well +as she could. She rose at five minutes past six, and in a subsidiary +way she helped to get the breakfast, to eat it, to wash up the dishes, +to work in the garden, to quilt, to sew, to visit and receive, and no +one could have tried harder than she did to keep awake when the widow +read aloud in the evening. +</P> + +<P> +All these things happened every day in the summertime, but in the +winter the widow and Dorcas cleared the snow from their little front +path instead of attending to the flowers, and in the evening they +lighted a fire as well as a lamp in the parlor. +</P> + +<P> +Sometimes, however, something different happened, but this was not +often, only a few times in the year. One of the different things +occurred when Mrs. Ducket and Dorcas were sitting on their little front +porch one summer afternoon, one on the little bench on one side of the +door, and the other on the little bench on the other side of the door, +each waiting until she should hear the clock strike five, to prepare +tea. But it was not yet a quarter to five when a one-horse wagon +containing four men came slowly down the street. Dorcas first saw the +wagon, and she instantly stopped knitting. +</P> + +<P> +"Mercy on me!" she exclaimed. "Whoever those people are, they are +strangers here, and they don't know where to stop, for they first go to +one side of the street and then to the other." +</P> + +<P> +The widow looked around sharply. "Humph!" said she. "Those men are +sailormen. You might see that in a twinklin' of an eye. Sailormen +always drive that way, because that is the way they sail ships. They +first tack in one direction and then in another." +</P> + +<P> +"Mr. Ducket didn't like the sea?" remarked Dorcas, for about the three +hundredth time. +</P> + +<P> +"No, he didn't," answered the widow, for about the two hundred and +fiftieth time, for there had been occasions when she thought Dorcas put +this question inopportunely. "He hated it, and he was drowned in it +through trustin' a sailorman, which I never did nor shall. Do you +really believe those men are comin' here?" +</P> + +<P> +"Upon my word I do!" said Dorcas, and her opinion was correct. +</P> + +<P> +The wagon drew up in front of Mrs. Ducket's little white house, and the +two women sat rigidly, their hands in their laps, staring at the man +who drove. +</P> + +<P> +This was an elderly personage with whitish hair, and under his chin a +thin whitish beard, which waved in the gentle breeze and gave Dorcas +the idea that his head was filled with hair which was leaking out from +below. +</P> + +<P> +"Is this the Widow Ducket's?" inquired this elderly man, in a strong, +penetrating voice. +</P> + +<P> +"That's my name," said the widow, and laying her knitting on the bench +beside her, she went to the gate. Dorcas also laid her knitting on the +bench beside her and went to the gate. +</P> + +<P> +"I was told," said the elderly man, "at a house we touched at about a +quarter of a mile back, that the Widow Ducket's was the only house in +this village where there was any chance of me and my mates getting a +meal. We are four sailors, and we are making from the bay over to +Cuppertown, and that's eight miles ahead yet, and we are all pretty +sharp set for something to eat." +</P> + +<P> +"This is the place," said the widow, "and I do give meals if there is +enough in the house and everything comes handy." +</P> + +<P> +"Does everything come handy to-day?" said he. +</P> + +<P> +"It does," said she, "and you can hitch your horse and come in; but I +haven't got anything for him." +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, that's all right," said the man, "we brought along stores for him, +so we'll just make fast and then come in." +</P> + +<P> +The two women hurried into the house in a state of bustling +preparation, for the furnishing of this meal meant one dollar in cash. +</P> + +<P> +The four mariners, all elderly men, descended from the wagon, each one +scrambling with alacrity over a different wheel. +</P> + +<P> +A box of broken ship-biscuit was brought out and put on the ground in +front of the horse, who immediately set himself to eating with great +satisfaction. +</P> + +<P> +Tea was a little late that day, because there were six persons to +provide for instead of two, but it was a good meal, and after the four +seamen had washed their hands and faces at the pump in the back yard +and had wiped them on two towels furnished by Dorcas, they all came in +and sat down. Mrs. Ducket seated herself at the head of the table with +the dignity proper to the mistress of the house, and Dorcas seated +herself at the other end with the dignity proper to the disciple of the +mistress. No service was necessary, for everything that was to be +eaten or drunk was on the table. +</P> + +<P> +When each of the elderly mariners had had as much bread and butter, +quickly baked soda-biscuit, dried beef, cold ham, cold tongue, and +preserved fruit of every variety known, as his storage capacity would +permit, the mariner in command, Captain Bird, pushed back his chair, +whereupon the other mariners pushed back their chairs. +</P> + +<P> +"Madam," said Captain Bird, "we have all made a good meal, which didn't +need to be no better nor more of it, and we're satisfied; but that +horse out there has not had time to rest himself enough to go the eight +miles that lies ahead of us, so, if it's all the same to you and this +good lady, we'd like to sit on that front porch awhile and smoke our +pipes. I was a-looking at that porch when I came in, and I bethought +to myself what a rare good place it was to smoke a pipe in." +</P> + +<P> +"There's pipes been smoked there," said the widow, rising, "and it can +be done again. Inside the house I don't allow tobacco, but on the +porch neither of us minds." +</P> + +<P> +o the four captains betook themselves to the porch, two of<BR> +them seating themselves on the little bench on one side of the door, +and two of them on the little bench on the other side of the door, and +lighted their pipes. +</P> + +<P> +"Shall we clear off the table and wash up the dishes," said Dorcas, "or +wait until they are gone?" +</P> + +<P> +"We will wait until they are gone," said the widow, "for now that they +are here we might as well have a bit of a chat with them. When a +sailorman lights his pipe he is generally willin' to talk, but when he +is eatin' you can't get a word out of him." +</P> + +<P> +Without thinking it necessary to ask permission, for the house belonged +to her, the Widow Ducket brought a chair and put it in the hall close +to the open front door, and Dorcas brought another chair and seated +herself by the side of the widow. +</P> + +<P> +"Do all you sailormen belong down there at the bay?" asked Mrs. Ducket; +thus the conversation began, and in a few minutes it had reached a +point at which Captain Bird thought it proper to say that a great many +strange things happen to seamen sailing on the sea which lands-people +never dream of. +</P> + +<P> +"Such as anything in particular?" asked the widow, at which remark +Dorcas clasped her hands in expectancy. +</P> + +<P> +At this question each of the mariners took his pipe from his mouth and +gazed upon the floor in thought. +</P> + +<P> +"There's a good many strange things happened to me and my mates at sea. +Would you and that other lady like to hear any of them?" asked Captain +Bird. +</P> + +<P> +"We would like to hear them if they are true," said the widow. +</P> + +<P> +"There's nothing happened to me and my mates that isn't true," said +Captain Bird, "and here is something that once happened to me: I was +on a whaling v'yage when a big sperm-whale, just as mad as a fiery +bull, came at us, head on, and struck the ship at the stern with such +tremendous force that his head crashed right through her timbers and he +went nearly half his length into her hull. The hold was mostly filled +with empty barrels, for we was just beginning our v'yage, and when he +had made kindling-wood of these there was room enough for him. We all +expected that it wouldn't take five minutes for the vessel to fill and +go to the bottom, and we made ready to take to the boats; but it turned +out we didn't need to take to no boats, for as fast as the water rushed +into the hold of the ship, that whale drank it and squirted it up +through the two blow-holes in the top of his head, and as there was an +open hatchway just over his head, the water all went into the sea +again, and that whale kept working day and night pumping the water out +until we beached the vessel on the island of Trinidad—the whale +helping us wonderful on our way over by the powerful working of his +tail, which, being outside in the water, acted like a propeller. I +don't believe any thing stranger than that ever happened to a whaling +ship." +</P> + +<P> +"No," said the widow, "I don't believe anything ever did." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Bird now looked at Captain Sanderson, and the latter took his +pipe out of his mouth and said that in all his sailing around the world +he had never known anything queerer than what happened to a big +steamship he chanced to be on, which ran into an island in a fog. +Everybody on board thought the ship was wrecked, but it had twin +screws, and was going at such a tremendous speed that it turned the +island entirely upside down and sailed over it, and he had heard tell +that even now people sailing over the spot could look down into the +water and see the roots of the trees and the cellars of the houses. +</P> + +<P> +Captain Sanderson now put his pipe back into his mouth, and Captain +Burress took out his pipe. +</P> + +<P> +"I was once in an obelisk-ship," said he, "that used to trade regular +between Egypt and New York, carrying obelisks. We had a big obelisk on +board. The way they ship obelisks is to make a hole in the stern of +the ship, and run the obelisk in, p'inted end foremost; and this +obelisk filled up nearly the whole of that ship from stern to bow. We +was about ten days out, and sailing afore a northeast gale with the +engines at full speed, when suddenly we spied breakers ahead, and our +Captain saw we was about to run on a bank. Now if we hadn't had an +obelisk on board we might have sailed over that bank, but the captain +knew that with an obelisk on board we drew too much water for this, and +that we'd be wrecked in about fifty-five seconds if something wasn't +done quick. So he had to do something quick, and this is what he did: +He ordered all steam on, and drove slam-bang on that bank. Just as he +expected, we stopped so suddint that that big obelisk bounced for'ard, +its p'inted end foremost, and went clean through the bow and shot out +into the sea. The minute it did that the vessel was so lightened that +it rose in the water and we easily steamed over the bank. There was +one man knocked overboard by the shock when we struck, but as soon as +we missed him we went back after him and we got him all right. You +see, when that obelisk went overboard, its butt-end, which was +heaviest, went down first, and when it touched the bottom it just stood +there, and as it was such a big obelisk there was about five and a half +feet of it stuck out of the water. The man who was knocked overboard +he just swum for that obelisk and he climbed up the hiryglyphics. It +was a mighty fine obelisk, and the Egyptians had cut their hiryglyphics +good and deep, so that the man could get hand and foot-hold; and when +we got to him and took him off, he was sitting high and dry on the +p'inted end of that obelisk. It was a great pity about the obelisk, +for it was a good obelisk, but as I never heard the company tried to +raise it, I expect it is standing there yet." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Burress now put his pipe back into his mouth and looked at +Captain Jenkinson, who removed his pipe and said: +</P> + +<P> +"The queerest thing that ever happened to me was about a shark. We was +off the Banks, and the time of year was July, and the ice was coming +down, and we got in among a lot of it. Not far away, off our weather +bow, there was a little iceberg which had such a queerness about it +that the captain and three men went in a boat to look at it. The ice +was mighty clear ice, and you could see almost through it, and right +inside of it, not more than three feet above the waterline, and about +two feet, or maybe twenty inches, inside the ice, was a whopping big +shark, about fourteen feet long,—a regular man-eater,—frozen in there +hard and fast. `Bless my soul,' said the captain, `this is a wonderful +curiosity, and I'm going to git him out.' Just then one of the men +said he saw that shark wink, but the captain wouldn't believe him, for +he said that shark was frozen stiff and hard and couldn't wink. You +see, the captain had his own idees about things, and he knew that +whales was warm-blooded and would freeze if they was shut up in ice, +but he forgot that sharks was not whales and that they're cold-blooded +just like toads. And there is toads that has been shut up in rocks for +thousands of years, and they stayed alive, no matter how cold the place +was, because they was cold-blooded, and when the rocks was split, out +hopped the frog. But, as I said before, the captain forgot sharks was +cold-blooded, and he determined to git that one out. +</P> + +<P> +"Now you both know, being housekeepers, that if you take a needle and +drive it into a hunk of ice you can split it. The captain had a +sail-needle with him, and so he drove it into the iceberg right +alongside of the shark and split it. Now the minute he did it he knew +that the man was right when he said he saw the shark wink, for it +flopped out of that iceberg quicker nor a flash of lightning." +</P> + +<P> +"What a happy fish he must have been!" ejaculated Dorcas, forgetful of +precedent, so great was her emotion. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," said Captain Jenkinson, "it was a happy fish enough, but it +wasn't a happy captain. You see, that shark hadn't had anything to +eat, perhaps for a thousand years, until the captain came along with +his sail-needle." +</P> + +<P> +"Surely you sailormen do see strange things," now said the widow, "and +the strangest thing about them is that they are true." +</P> + +<P> +"Yes, indeed," said Dorcas, "that is the most wonderful thing." +</P> + +<P> +"You wouldn't suppose," said the Widow Ducket, glancing from one bench +of mariners to the other, "that I have a sea-story to tell, but I have, +and if you like I will tell it to you." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Bird looked up a little surprised. +</P> + +<P> +"We would like to hear it—indeed, we would, madam," said he. +</P> + +<P> +"Ay, ay!" said Captain Burress, and the two other mariners nodded. +</P> + +<P> +"It was a good while ago," she said, "when I was living on the shore +near the head of the bay, that my husband was away and I was left alone +in the house. One mornin' my sister-in-law, who lived on the other +side of the bay, sent me word by a boy on a horse that she hadn't any +oil in the house to fill the lamp that she always put in the window to +light her husband home, who was a fisherman, and if I would send her +some by the boy she would pay me back as soon as they bought oil. The +boy said he would stop on his way home and take the oil to her, but he +never did stop, or perhaps he never went back, and about five o'clock I +began to get dreadfully worried, for I knew if that lamp wasn't in my +sister-in-law's window by dark she might be a widow before midnight. +So I said to myself, `I've got to get that oil to her, no matter what +happens or how it's done.' Of course I couldn't tell what might +happen, but there was only one way it could be done, and that was for +me to get into the boat that was tied to the post down by the water, +and take it to her, for it was too far for me to walk around by the +head of the bay. Now, the trouble was, I didn't know no more about a +boat and the managin' of it than any one of you sailormen knows about +clear starchin'. But there wasn't no use of thinkin' what I knew and +what I didn't know, for I had to take it to her, and there was no way +of doin' it except in that boat. So I filled a gallon can, for I +thought I might as well take enough while I was about it, and I went +down to the water and I unhitched that boat and I put the oil-can into +her, and then I got in, and off I started, and when I was about a +quarter of a mile from the shore—" +</P> + +<P> +"Madam," interrupted Captain Bird, "did you row or—or was there a sail +to the boat?" +</P> + +<P> +The widow looked at the questioner for a moment. "No," said she, "I +didn't row. I forgot to bring the oars from the house; but it didn't +matter, for I didn't know how to use them, and if there had been a sail +I couldn't have put it up, for I didn't know how to use it, either. I +used the rudder to make the boat go. The rudder was the only thing I +knew anything about. I'd held a rudder when I was a little girl, and I +knew how to work it. So I just took hold of the handle of the rudder +and turned it round and round, and that made the boat go ahead, you +know, and—" +</P> + +<P> +"Madam!" exclaimed Captain Bird, and the other elderly mariners took +their pipes from their mouths. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes, that is the way I did it," continued the widow, briskly. "Big +steamships are made to go by a propeller turning round and round at +their back ends, and I made the rudder work in the same way, and I got +along very well, too, until suddenly, when I was about a quarter of a +mile from the shore, a most terrible and awful storm arose. There must +have been a typhoon or a cyclone out at sea, for the waves came up the +bay bigger than houses, and when they got to the head of the bay they +turned around and tried to get out to sea again. So in this way they +continually met, and made the most awful and roarin' pilin' up of waves +that ever was known. +</P> + +<P> +"My little boat was pitched about as if it had been a feather in a +breeze, and when the front part of it was cleavin' itself down into the +water the hind part was stickin' up until the rudder whizzed around +like a patent churn with no milk in it. The thunder began to roar and +the lightnin' flashed, and three seagulls, so nearly frightened to +death that they began to turn up the whites of their eyes, flew down +and sat on one of the seats of the boat, forgettin' in that awful +moment that man was their nat'ral enemy. I had a couple of biscuits in +my pocket, because I had thought I might want a bite in crossing, and I +crumbled up one of these and fed the poor creatures. Then I began to +wonder what I was goin' to do, for things were gettin' awfuller and +awfuller every instant, and the little boat was a-heavin' and +a-pitchin' and a-rollin' and h'istin' itself up, first on one end and +then on the other, to such an extent that if I hadn't kept tight hold +of the rudder-handle I'd slipped off the seat I was sittin' on. +</P> + +<P> +"All of a sudden I remembered that oil in the can; but just as I was +puttin' my fingers on the cork my conscience smote me. `Am I goin' to +use this oil,' I said to myself, `and let my sister-in-law's husband be +wrecked for want of it?' And then I thought that he wouldn't want it +all that night, and perhaps they would buy oil the next day, and so I +poured out about a tumblerful of it on the water, and I can just tell +you sailormen that you never saw anything act as prompt as that did. +In three seconds, or perhaps five, the water all around me, for the +distance of a small front yard, was just as flat as a table and as +smooth as glass, and so invitin' in appearance that the three gulls +jumped out of the boat and began to swim about on it, primin' their +feathers and lookin' at themselves in the transparent depths, though I +must say that one of them made an awful face as he dipped his bill into +the water and tasted kerosene. +</P> + +<P> +"Now I had time to sit quiet in the midst of the placid space I had +made for myself, and rest from workin' of the rudder. Truly it was a +wonderful and marvellous thing to look at. The waves was roarin' and +leapin' up all around me higher than the roof of this house, and +sometimes their tops would reach over so that they nearly met and shut +out all view of the stormy sky, which seemed as if it was bein' torn to +pieces by blazin' lightnin', while the thunder pealed so tremendous +that it almost drowned the roar of the waves. Not only above and all +around me was every thing terrific and fearful, but even under me it +was the same, for there was a big crack in the bottom of the boat as +wide as my hand, and through this I could see down into the water +beneath, and there was—" +</P> + +<P> +"Madam!" ejaculated Captain Bird, the hand which had been holding his +pipe a few inches from his mouth now dropping to his knee; and at this +motion the hands which held the pipes of the three other mariners +dropped to their knees. +</P> + +<P> +"Of course it sounds strange," continued the widow, "but I know that +people can see down into clear water, and the water under me was clear, +and the crack was wide enough for me to see through, and down under me +was sharks and swordfishes and other horrible water creatures, which I +had never seen before, all driven into the bay, I haven't a doubt, by +the violence of the storm out at sea. The thought of my bein' upset +and fallin' in among those monsters made my very blood run cold, and +involuntary-like I began to turn the handle of the rudder, and in a +moment I shot into a wall of ragin' sea-water that was towerin' around +me. For a second I was fairly blinded and stunned, but I had the cork +out of that oil-can in no time, and very soon—you'd scarcely believe +it if I told you how soon—I had another placid mill-pond surroundin' +of me. I sat there a-pantin' and fannin' with my straw hat, for you'd +better believe I was flustered, and then I began to think how long it +would take me to make a line of mill-ponds clean across the head of the +bay, and how much oil it would need, and whether I had enough. So I +sat and calculated that if a tumblerful of oil would make a smooth +place about seven yards across, which I should say was the width of the +one I was in,—which I calculated by a measure of my eye as to how many +breadths of carpet it would take to cover it,—and if the bay was two +miles across betwixt our house and my sister-in-law's, and, although I +couldn't get the thing down to exact figures, I saw pretty soon that I +wouldn't have oil enough to make a level cuttin' through all those +mountainous billows, and besides, even if I had enough to take me +across, what would be the good of goin' if there wasn't any oil left to +fill my sister-in-law's lamp? +</P> + +<P> +"While I was thinkin' and calculatin' a perfectly dreadful thing +happened, which made me think if I didn't get out of this pretty soon +I'd find myself in a mighty risky predicament. The oil-can, which I +had forgotten to put the cork in, toppled over, and before I could grab +it every drop of the oil ran into the hind part of the boat, where it +was soaked up by a lot of dry dust that was there. No wonder my heart +sank when I saw this. Glancin' wildly around me, as people will do +when they are scared, I saw the smooth place I was in gettin' smaller +and smaller, for the kerosene was evaporatin', as it will do even off +woollen clothes if you give it time enough. The first pond I had come +out of seemed to be covered up, and the great, towerin', throbbin' +precipice of sea-water was a-closin' around me. +</P> + +<P> +"Castin' down my eyes in despair, I happened to look through the crack +in the bottom of the boat, and oh, what a blessed relief it was! for +down there everything was smooth and still, and I could see the sand on +the bottom, as level and hard, no doubt, as it was on the beach. +Suddenly the thought struck me that that bottom would give me the only +chance I had of gettin' out of the frightful fix I was in. If I could +fill that oil-can with air, and then puttin' it under my arm and takin' +a long breath if I could drop down on that smooth bottom, I might run +along toward shore, as far as I could, and then, when I felt my breath +was givin' out, I could take a pull at the oil-can and take another +run, and then take another pull and another run, and perhaps the can +would hold air enough for me until I got near enough to shore to wade +to dry land. To be sure, the sharks and other monsters were down +there, but then they must have been awfully frightened, and perhaps +they might not remember that man was their nat'ral enemy. Anyway, I +thought it would be better to try the smooth water passage down there +than stay and be swallowed up by the ragin' waves on top. +</P> + +<P> +"So I blew the can full of air and corked it, and then I tore up some +of the boards from the bottom of the boat so as to make a hole big +enough for me to get through,—and you sailormen needn't wriggle so +when I say that, for you all know a divin'-bell hasn't any bottom at +all and the water never comes in,—and so when I got the hole big +enough I took the oil-can under my arm, and was just about to slip down +through it when I saw an awful turtle a-walkin' through the sand at the +bottom. Now, I might trust sharks and swordfishes and sea-serpents to +be frightened and forget about their nat'ral enemies, but I never could +trust a gray turtle as big as a cart, with a black neck a yard long, +with yellow bags to its jaws, to forget anything or to remember +anything. I'd as lieve get into a bath-tub with a live crab as to go +down there. It wasn't of no use even so much as thinkin' of it, so I +gave up that plan and didn't once look through that hole again." +</P> + +<P> +"And what did you do, madam?" asked Captain Bird, who was regarding her +with a face of stone. +</P> + +<P> +"I used electricity," she said. "Now don't start as if you had a shock +of it. That's what I used. When I was younger than I was then, and +sometimes visited friends in the city, we often amused ourselves by +rubbing our feet on the carpet until we got ourselves so full of +electricity that we could put up our fingers and light the gas. So I +said to myself that if I could get full of electricity for the purpose +of lightin' the gas I could get full of it for other purposes, and so, +without losin' a moment, I set to work. I stood up on one of the +seats, which was dry, and I rubbed the bottoms of my shoes backward and +forward on it with such violence and swiftness that they pretty soon +got warm and I began fillin' with electricity, and when I was fully +charged with it from my toes to the top of my head, I just sprang into +the water and swam ashore. Of course I couldn't sink, bein' full of +electricity." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Bird heaved a long sigh and rose to his feet, whereupon the +other mariners rose to their feet "Madam," said Captain Bird, "what's +to pay for the supper and—the rest of the entertainment?" +</P> + +<P> +"The supper is twenty-five cents apiece," said the Widow Ducket, "and +everything else is free, gratis." +</P> + +<P> +Whereupon each mariner put his hand into his trousers pocket, pulled +out a silver quarter, and handed it to the widow. Then, with four +solemn "Good evenin's," they went out to the front gate. +</P> + +<P> +"Cast off, Captain Jenkinson," said Captain Bird, "and you, Captain +Burress, clew him up for'ard. You can stay in the bow, Captain +Sanderson, and take the sheet-lines. I'll go aft." +</P> + +<P> +All being ready, each of the elderly mariners clambered over a wheel, +and having seated themselves, they prepared to lay their course for +Cuppertown. +</P> + +<P> +But just as they were about to start, Captain Jenkinson asked that they +lay to a bit, and clambering down over his wheel, he reentered the +front gate and went up to the door of the house, where the widow and +Dorcas were still standing. +</P> + +<P> +"Madam," said he, "I just came back to ask what became of your +brother-in-law through his wife's not bein' able to put no light in the +window?" +</P> + +<P> +"The storm drove him ashore on our side of the bay," said she, "and the +next mornin' he came up to our house, and I told him all that had +happened to me. And when he took our boat and went home and told that +story to his wife, she just packed up and went out West, and got +divorced from him. And it served him right, too." +</P> + +<P> +"Thank you, ma'am," said Captain Jenkinson, and going out of the gate, +he clambered up over the wheel, and the wagon cleared for Cuppertown. +</P> + +<P> +When the elderly mariners were gone, the Widow Ducket, still standing +in the door, turned to Dorcas. +</P> + +<P> +"Think of it!" she said. "To tell all that to me, in my own house! +And after I had opened my one jar of brandied peaches, that I'd been +keepin' for special company!" +</P> + +<P> +"In your own house!" ejaculated Dorcas. "And not one of them brandied +peaches left!" +</P> + +<P> +The widow jingled the four quarters in her hand before she slipped them +into her pocket. +</P> + +<P> +"Anyway, Dorcas," she remarked, "I think we can now say we are square +with all the world, and so let's go in and wash the dishes." +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," said Dorcas, "we're square." +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<A NAME="chap04"></A> +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +CAPTAIN ELI'S BEST EAR +</H3> + +<P> +The little seaside village of Sponkannis lies so quietly upon a +protected spot on our Atlantic coast that it makes no more stir in the +world than would a pebble which, held between one's finger and thumb, +should be dipped below the surface of a millpond and then dropped. +About the post-office and the store—both under the same roof—the +greater number of the houses cluster, as if they had come for their +week's groceries, or were waiting for the mail, while toward the west +the dwellings become fewer and fewer, until at last the village blends +into a long stretch of sandy coast and scrubby pine-woods. Eastward +the village ends abruptly at the foot of a windswept bluff, on which no +one cares to build. +</P> + +<P> +Among the last houses in the western end of the village stood two neat, +substantial dwellings, one belonging to Captain Eli Bunker, and the +other to Captain Cephas Dyer. These householders were two very +respectable retired mariners, the first a widower about fifty, and the +other a bachelor of perhaps the same age, a few years more or less +making but little difference in this region of weather-beaten youth and +seasoned age. +</P> + +<P> +Each of these good captains lived alone, and each took entire charge of +his own domestic affairs, not because he was poor, but because it +pleased him to do so. When Captain Eli retired from the sea he was the +owner of a good vessel, which he sold at a fair profit; and Captain +Cephas had made money in many a voyage before he built his house in +Sponkannis and settled there. +</P> + +<P> +When Captain Eli's wife was living she was his household manager. But +Captain Cephas had never had a woman in his house, except during the +first few months of his occupancy, when certain female neighbors came +in occasionally to attend to little matters of cleaning which, +according to popular notions, properly belong to the sphere of woman. +</P> + +<P> +But Captain Cephas soon put an end to this sort of thing. He did not +like a woman's ways, especially her ways of attending to domestic +affairs. He liked to live in sailor fashion, and to keep house in +sailor fashion. In his establishment everything was shipshape, and +everything which could be stowed away was stowed away, and, if +possible, in a bunker. The floors were holystoned nearly every day, +and the whole house was repainted about twice a year, a little at a +time, when the weather was suitable for this marine recreation. Things +not in frequent use were lashed securely to the walls, or perhaps put +out of the way by being hauled up to the ceiling by means of blocks and +tackle. His cooking was done sailor fashion, like everything else, and +he never failed to have plum-duff on Sunday. His well was near his +house, and every morning he dropped into it a lead and line, and noted +down the depth of water. Three times a day he entered in a little +note-book the state of the weather, the height of the mercury in +barometer and thermometer, the direction of the wind, and special +weather points when necessary. +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli managed his domestic affairs in an entirely different way. +He kept house woman fashion—not, however, in the manner of an ordinary +woman, but after the manner of his late wife, Miranda Bunker, now dead +some seven years. Like his friend, Captain Cephas, he had had the +assistance of his female neighbors during the earlier days of his +widowerhood. But he soon found that these women did not do things as +Miranda used to do them, and, although he frequently suggested that +they should endeavor to imitate the methods of his late consort, they +did not even try to do things as she used to do them, preferring their +own ways. Therefore it was that Captain Eli determined to keep house +by himself, and to do it, as nearly as his nature would allow, as +Miranda used to do it. He swept his doors and he shook his door-mats; +he washed his paint with soap and hot water; he dusted his furniture +with a soft cloth, which he afterwards stuck behind a chest of drawers. +He made his bed very neatly, turning down the sheet at the top, and +setting the pillow upon edge, smoothing it carefully after he had done +so. His cooking was based on the methods of the late Miranda. He had +never been able to make bread rise properly, but he had always liked +ship-biscuit, and he now greatly preferred them to the risen bread made +by his neighbors. And as to coffee and the plainer articles of food +with which he furnished his table, even Miranda herself would not have +objected to them had she been alive and very hungry. +</P> + +<P> +The houses of the two captains were not very far apart, and they were +good neighbors, often smoking their pipes together and talking of the +sea. But this was always on the little porch in front of Captain +Cephas's house, or by his kitchen fire in the winter. Captain Eli did +not like the smell of tobacco smoke in his house, or even in front of +it in summer-time, when the doors were open. He had no objection +himself to the odor of tobacco, but it was contrary to the principles +of woman housekeeping that rooms should smell of it, and he was always +true to those principles. +</P> + +<P> +It was late in a certain December, and through the village there was a +pleasant little flutter of Christmas preparations. Captain Eli had +been up to the store, and he had stayed there a good while, warming +himself by the stove, and watching the women coming in to buy things +for Christmas. It was strange how many things they bought for presents +or for holiday use—fancy soap and candy, handkerchiefs and little +woollen shawls for old people, and a lot of pretty little things which +he knew the use of, but which Captain Cephas would never have +understood at all had he been there. +</P> + +<P> +As Captain Eli came out of the store he saw a cart in which were two +good-sized Christmas trees, which had been cut in the woods, and were +going, one to Captain Holmes's house, and the other to Mother Nelson's. +Captain Holmes had grandchildren, and Mother Nelson, with never a child +of her own, good old soul, had three little orphan nieces who never +wanted for anything needful at Christmas-time or any other time. +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli walked home very slowly, taking observations in his mind. +It was more than seven years since he had had anything to do with +Christmas, except that on that day he had always made himself a +mince-pie, the construction and the consumption of which were equally +difficult. It is true that neighbors had invited him, and they had +invited Captain Cephas, to their Christmas dinners, but neither of +these worthy seamen had ever accepted any of these invitations. Even +holiday food, when not cooked in sailor fashion, did not agree with +Captain Cephas, and it would have pained the good heart of Captain Eli +if he had been forced to make believe to enjoy a Christmas dinner so +very inferior to those which Miranda used to set before him. +</P> + +<P> +But now the heart of Captain Eli was gently moved by a Christmas +flutter. It had been foolish, perhaps, for him to go up to the store +at such a time as this, but the mischief had been done. Old feelings +had come back to him, and he would be glad to celebrate Christmas this +year if he could think of any good way to do it. And the result of his +mental observations was that he went over to Captain Cephas's house to +talk to him about it. +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas was in his kitchen, smoking his third morning pipe. +Captain Eli filled his pipe, lighted it, and sat down by the fire. +</P> + +<P> +"Cap'n," said he, "what do you say to our keepin Christmas this year? +A Christmas dinner is no good if it's got to be eat alone, and you and +me might eat ourn together. It might be in my house, or it might be in +your house—it won't make no great difference to me which. Of course, +I like woman housekeepin', as is laid down in the rules of service fer +my house. But next best to that I like sailor housekeepin', so I don't +mind which house the dinner is in, Cap'n Cephas, so it suits you." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas took his pipe from his mouth. "You're pretty late +thinkin' about it," said he, "fer day after to-morrow's Christmas." +</P> + +<P> +"That don't make no difference," said Captain Eli. "What things we +want that are not in my house or your house we can easily get either up +at the store or else in the woods." +</P> + +<P> +"In the woods!" exclaimed Captain Cephas. "What in the name of thunder +do you expect to get in the woods for Christmas?" +</P> + +<P> +"A Christmas tree," said Captain Eli. "I thought it might be a nice +thing to have a Christmas tree fer Christmas. Cap'n Holmes has got +one, and Mother Nelson's got another. I guess nearly everybody's got +one. It won't cost anything—I can go and cut it." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas grinned a grin, as if a great leak had been sprung in +the side of a vessel, stretching nearly from stem to stern. +</P> + +<P> +"A Christmas tree!" he exclaimed. "Well, I am blessed! But look here, +Cap'n Eli. You don't know what a Christmas tree's fer. It's fer +children, and not fer grown-ups. Nobody ever does have a Christmas +tree in any house where there ain't no children." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli rose and stood with his back to the fire. "I didn't think +of that," he said, "but I guess it's so. And when I come to think of +it, a Christmas isn't much of a Christmas, anyway, without children." +</P> + +<P> +"You never had none," said Captain Cephas, "and you've kept Christmas." +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," replied Captain Eli, reflectively, "we did do it, but there was +always a lackment—Miranda has said so, and I have said so." +</P> + +<P> +"You didn't have no Christmas tree," said Captain Cephas. +</P> + +<P> +"No, we didn't. But I don't think that folks was as much set on +Christmas trees then as they 'pear to be now. I wonder," he continued, +thoughtfully gazing at the ceiling, "if we was to fix up a Christmas +tree—and you and me's got a lot of pretty things that we've picked up +all over the world, that would go miles ahead of anything that could be +bought at the store fer Christmas trees—if we was to fix up a tree +real nice, if we couldn't get some child or other that wasn't likely to +have a tree to come in and look at it, and stay awhile, and make +Christmas more like Christmas. And then, when it went away, it could +take along the things that was hangin' on the tree, and keep 'em fer +its own." +</P> + +<P> +"That wouldn't work," said Captain Cephas. "If you get a child into +this business, you must let it hang up its stockin' before it goes to +bed, and find it full in the mornin', and then tell it an all-fired lie +about Santa Claus if it asks any questions. Most children think more +of stockin's than they do of trees—so I've heard, at least." +</P> + +<P> +"I've got no objections to stockin's," said Captain Eli. "If it wanted +to hang one up, it could hang one up either here or in my house, +wherever we kept Christmas." +</P> + +<P> +"You couldn't keep a child all night," sardonically remarked Captain +Cephas, "and no more could I. Fer if it was to get up a croup in the +night, it would be as if we was on a lee shore with anchors draggin' +and a gale a-blowin'." +</P> + +<P> +"That's so," said Captain Eli. "You've put it fair. I suppose if we +did keep a child all night, we'd have to have some sort of a woman +within hail in case of a sudden blow." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas sniffed. "What's the good of talkin'?" said he. "There +ain't no child, and there ain't no woman that you could hire to sit all +night on my front step or on your front step, a-waitin' to be piped on +deck in case of croup." +</P> + +<P> +"No," said Captain Eli. "I don't suppose there's any child in this +village that ain't goin' to be provided with a Christmas tree or a +Christmas stockin', or perhaps both—except, now I come to think of it, +that little gal that was brought down here with her mother last summer, +and has been kept by Mrs. Crumley sence her mother died." +</P> + +<P> +"And won't be kept much longer," said Captain Cephas, "fer I've hearn +Mrs. Crumley say she couldn't afford it." +</P> + +<P> +"That's so," said Captain Eli. "If she can't afford to keep the little +gal, she can't afford to give no Christmas trees nor stockin's, and so +it seems to me, cap'n, that that little gal would be a pretty good +child to help us keep Christmas." +</P> + +<P> +"You're all the time forgettin'," said the other, "that nuther of us +can keep a child all night." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli seated himself, and looked ponderingly into the fire. +"You're right, cap'n," said he. "We'd have to ship some woman to take +care of her. Of course, it wouldn't be no use to ask Mrs. Crumley?" +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas laughed. "I should say not." +</P> + +<P> +"And there doesn't seem to be anybody else," said his companion. "Can +you think of anybody, cap'n?" +</P> + +<P> +"There ain't anybody to think of," replied Captain Cephas, "unless it +might be Eliza Trimmer. She's generally ready enough to do anything +that turns up. But she wouldn't be no good—her house is too far away +for either you or me to hail her in case a croup came up suddint." +</P> + +<P> +"That's so," said Captain Eli. "She does live a long way off." +</P> + +<P> +"So that settles the whole business," said Captain Cephas. "She's too +far away to come if wanted, and nuther of us couldn't keep no child +without somebody to come if they was wanted, and it's no use to have a +Christmas tree without a child. A Christmas without a Christmas tree +don't seem agreeable to you, cap'n, so I guess we'd better get along +just the same as we've been in the habit of doin', and eat our +Christmas dinner, as we do our other meals in our own houses." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli looked into the fire. "I don't like to give up things if I +can help it. That was always my way. If wind and tide's ag'in' me, I +can wait till one or the other, or both of them, serve." +</P> + +<P> +Yes," said Captain Cephas, "you was always that kind of a<BR> +man." +</P> + +<P> +"That's so. But it does 'pear to me as if I'd have to give up this +time, though it's a pity to do it, on account of the little gal, fer +she ain't likely to have any Christmas this year. She's a nice little +gal, and takes as natural to navigation as if she'd been born at sea. +I've given her two or three things because she's so pretty, but there's +nothing she likes so much as a little ship I gave her." +</P> + +<P> +"Perhaps she was born at sea," remarked Captain Cephas. +</P> + +<P> +"Perhaps she was," said the other; "and that makes it the bigger pity." +</P> + +<P> +For a few moments nothing was said. Then Captain Eli suddenly +exclaimed, "I'll tell you what we might do, cap'n! We might ask Mrs. +Trimmer to lend a hand in givin' the little gal a Christmas. She ain't +got nobody in her house but herself, and I guess she'd be glad enough +to help give that little gal a regular Christmas. She could go and get +the child, and bring her to your house or to my house, or wherever +we're goin' to keep Christmas, and—" +</P> + +<P> +"Well," said Captain Cephas, with an air of scrutinizing inquiry, +"what?" +</P> + +<P> +"Well," replied the other, a little hesitatingly, "so far as I'm +concerned,—that is, I don't mind one way or the other,—she might take +her Christmas dinner along with us and the little gal, and then she +could fix her stockin' to be hung up, and help with the Christmas tree, +and—" +</P> + +<P> +"Well," demanded Captain Cephas, "what?" +</P> + +<P> +"Well," said Captain Eli, "she could—that is, it doesn't make any +difference to me one way or the other—she might stay all night at +whatever house we kept Christmas in, and then you and me might spend +the night in the other house, and then she could be ready there to help +the child in the mornin', when she came to look at her stockin'." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas fixed upon his friend an earnest glare. "That's pretty +considerable of an idea to come upon you so suddint," said he. "But I +can tell you one thing: there ain't a-goin' to be any such doin's in my +house. If you choose to come over here to sleep, and give up your +house to any woman you can find to take care of the little gal, all +right. But the thing can't be done here." +</P> + +<P> +There was a certain severity in these remarks, but they appeared to +affect Captain Eli very pleasantly. +</P> + +<P> +"Well," said he, "if you're satisfied, I am. I'll agree to any plan +you choose to make. It doesn't matter to me which house it's in, and +if you say my house, I say my house. All I want is to make the +business agreeable to all concerned. Now it's time fer me to go to my +dinner, and this afternoon we'd better go and try to get things +straightened out, because the little gal, and whatever woman comes with +her, ought to be at my house to-morrow before dark. S'posin' we divide +up this business: I'll go and see Mrs. Crumley about the little gal, +and you can go and see Mrs. Trimmer." +</P> + +<P> +"No, sir," promptly replied Captain Cephas, "I don't go to see no Mrs. +Trimmer. You can see both of them just the same as you can see +one—they're all along the same way. I'll go cut the Christmas tree." +</P> + +<P> +"All right," said Captain Eli. "It don't make no difference to me +which does which. But if I was you, cap'n, I'd cut a good big tree, +because we might as well have a good one while we're about it." +</P> + +<P> +When he had eaten his dinner, and washed up his dishes, and had put +everything away in neat, housewifely order, Captain Eli went to Mrs. +Crumley's house, and very soon finished his business there. Mrs. +Crumley kept the only house which might be considered a boarding-house +in the village of Sponkannis; and when she had consented to take charge +of the little girl who had been left on her hands she had hoped it +would not be very long before she would hear from some of her relatives +in regard to her maintenance. But she had heard nothing, and had now +ceased to expect to hear anything, and in consequence had frequently +remarked that she must dispose of the child some way or other, for she +couldn't afford to keep her any longer. Even an absence of a day or +two at the house of the good captain would be some relief, and Mrs. +Crumley readily consented to the Christmas scheme. As to the little +girl, she was delighted. She already looked upon Captain Eli as her +best friend in the world. +</P> + +<P> +It was not so easy to go to Mrs. Trimmer's house and put the business +before her. "It ought to be plain sailin' enough," Captain Eli said to +himself, over and over again, "but, fer all that, it don't seem to be +plain sailin'." +</P> + +<P> +But he was not a man to be deterred by difficult navigation, and he +walked straight to Eliza Trimmer's house. +</P> + +<P> +Mrs. Trimmer was a comely woman about thirty-five, who had come to the +village a year before, and had maintained herself, or at least had +tried to, by dressmaking and plain sewing. She had lived at Stetford, +a seaport about twenty miles away, and from there, three years before, +her husband, Captain Trimmer, had sailed away in a good-sized schooner, +and had never returned. She had come to Sponkannis because she thought +that there she could live cheaper and get more work than in her former +home. She had found the first quite possible, but her success in +regard to the work had not been very great. +</P> + +<P> +When Captain Eli entered Mrs. Trimmer's little room, he found her busy +mending a sail. Here fortune favored him. "You turn your hand to +'most anything, Mrs. Trimmer," said he, after he had greeted her. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, yes," she answered, with a smile, "I am obliged to do that. +Mending sails is pretty heavy work, but it's better than nothing." +</P> + +<P> +"I had a notion," said he, "that you was ready to turn your hand to any +good kind of business, so I thought I would step in and ask you if +you'd turn your hand to a little bit of business I've got on the +stocks." +</P> + +<P> +She stopped sewing on the sail, and listened while Captain Eli laid his +plan before her. "It's very kind in you and Captain Cephas to think of +all that," said she. "I have often noticed that poor little girl, and +pitied her. Certainly I'll come, and you needn't say anything about +paying me for it. I wouldn't think of asking to be paid for doing a +thing like that. And besides,"—she smiled again as she spoke,—"if +you are going to give me a Christmas dinner, as you say, that will make +things more than square." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli did not exactly agree with her, but he was in very good +humor, and she was in good humor, and the matter was soon settled, and +Mrs. Trimmer promised to come to the captain's house in the morning and +help about the Christmas tree, and in the afternoon to go to get the +little girl from Mrs. Crumley's and bring her to the house. +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli was delighted with the arrangements. "Things now seem to +be goin' along before a spankin' breeze," said he. "But I don't know +about the dinner. I guess you will have to leave that to me. I don't +believe Captain Cephas could eat a woman-cooked dinner. He's +accustomed to livin sailor fashion, you know, and he has declared over +and over again to me that woman-cookin' doesn't agree with him." +</P> + +<P> +"But I can cook sailor fashion," said Mrs. Trimmer,—"just as much +sailor fashion as you or Captain Cephas, and if he don't believe it, +I'll prove it to him; so you needn't worry about that." +</P> + +<P> +When the captain had gone, Mrs. Trimmer gayly put away the sail. There +was no need to finish it in a hurry, and no knowing when she would get +her money for it when it was done. No one had asked her to a Christmas +dinner that year, and she had expected to have a lonely time of it. +But it would be very pleasant to spend Christmas with the little girl +and the two good captains. Instead of sewing any more on the sail, she +got out some of her own clothes to see if they needed anything done to +them. +</P> + +<P> +The next morning Mrs. Trimmer went to Captain Eli's house, and finding +Captain Cephas there, they all set to work at the Christmas tree, which +was a very fine one, and had been planted in a box. Captain Cephas had +brought over a bundle of things from his house, and Captain Eli kept +running here and there, bringing, each time that he returned, some new +object, wonderful or pretty, which he had brought from China or Japan +or Corea, or some spicy island of the Eastern seas; and nearly every +time he came with these treasures Mrs. Trimmer declared that such +things were too good to put upon a Christmas tree, even for such a nice +little girl as the one for which that tree was intended. The presents +which Captain Cephas brought were much more suitable for the purpose; +they were odd and funny, and some of them pretty, but not expensive, as +were the fans and bits of shellwork and carved ivories which Captain +Eli wished to tie upon the twigs of the tree. +</P> + +<P> +There was a good deal of talk about all this, but Captain Eli had his +own way. +</P> + +<P> +"I don't suppose, after all," said he, "that the little gal ought to +have all the things. This is such a big tree that it's more like a +family tree. Cap'n Cephas can take some of my things, and I can take +some of his things, and, Mrs. Trimmer, if there's anything you like, +you can call it your present and take it for your own, so that will be +fair and comfortable all round. What I want is to make everybody +satisfied." +</P> + +<P> +"I'm sure I think they ought to be," said Mrs. Trimmer, looking very +kindly at Captain Eli. +</P> + +<P> +Mrs. Trimmer went home to her own house to dinner, and in the afternoon +she brought the little girl. She had said there ought to be an early +supper, so that the child would have time to enjoy the Christmas tree +before she became sleepy. +</P> + +<P> +This meal was prepared entirely by Captain Eli, and in sailor fashion, +not woman fashion, so that Captain Cephas could make no excuse for +eating his supper at home. Of course they all ought to be together the +whole of that Christmas eve. As for the big dinner on the morrow, that +was another affair, for Mrs. Trimmer undertook to make Captain Cephas +understand that she had always cooked for Captain Trimmer in sailor +fashion, and if he objected to her plum-duff, or if anybody else +objected to her mince-pie, she was going to be very much surprised. +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas ate his supper with a good relish, and was still eating +when the rest had finished. As to the Christmas tree, it was the most +valuable, if not the most beautiful, that had ever been set up in that +region. It had no candles upon it, but was lighted by three lamps and +a ship's lantern placed in the four corners of the room, and the little +girl was as happy as if the tree were decorated with little dolls and +glass balls. Mrs. Trimmer was intensely pleased and interested to see +the child so happy, and Captain Eli was much pleased and interested to +see the child and Mrs. Trimmer so happy, and Captain Cephas was +interested, and perhaps a little amused in a superior fashion, to see +Captain Eli and Mrs. Trimmer and the little child so happy. +</P> + +<P> +Then the distribution of the presents began. Captain Eli asked Captain +Cephas if he might have the wooden pipe that the latter had brought for +his present. Captain Cephas said he might take it, for all he cared, +and be welcome to it. Then Captain Eli gave Captain Cephas a red +bandanna handkerchief of a very curious pattern, and Captain Cephas +thanked him kindly. After which Captain Eli bestowed upon Mrs. Trimmer +a most beautiful tortoise-shell comb, carved and cut and polished in a +wonderful way, and with it he gave a tortoise-shell fan, carved in the +same fashion, because he said the two things seemed to belong to each +other and ought to go together; and he would not listen to one word of +what Mrs. Trimmer said about the gifts being too good for her, and that +she was not likely ever to use them. +</P> + +<P> +"It seems to me," said Captain Cephas, "that you might be giving +something to the little gal." +</P> + +<P> +Then Captain Eli remembered that the child ought not to be forgotten, +and her soul was lifted into ecstasy by many gifts, some of which Mrs. +Trimmer declared were too good for any child in this wide, wide world. +But Captain Eli answered that they could be taken care of by somebody +until the little girl was old enough to know their value. +</P> + +<P> +Then it was discovered that, unbeknown to anybody else, Mrs. Trimmer +had put some presents on the tree, which were things which had been +brought by Captain Trimmer from somewhere in the far East or the +distant West. These she bestowed upon Captain Cephas and Captain Eli. +And the end of all this was that in the whole of Sponkannis, from the +foot of the bluff to the east, to the very last house on the shore to +the west, there was not one Christmas eve party so happy as this one. +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas was not quite so happy as the three others were, but he +was very much interested. About nine o'clock the party broke up, and +the two captains put on their caps and buttoned up their pea-jackets, +and started for Captain Cephas's house, but not before Captain Eli had +carefully fastened every window and every door except the front door, +and had told Mrs. Trimmer how to fasten that when they had gone, and +had given her a boatswain's whistle, which she might blow out of the +window if there should be a sudden croup and it should be necessary for +any one to go anywhere. He was sure he could hear it, for the wind was +exactly right for him to hear a whistle from his house. When they had +gone Mrs. Trimmer put the little girl to bed, and was delighted to find +in what a wonderfully neat and womanlike fashion that house was kept. +</P> + +<P> +It was nearly twelve o'clock that night when Captain Eli, sleeping in +his bunk opposite that of Captain Cephas, was aroused by hearing a +sound. He had been lying with his best ear uppermost, so that he +should hear anything if there happened to be anything to hear. He did +hear something, but it was not a boatswain's whistle; it was a +prolonged cry, and it seemed to come from the sea. +</P> + +<P> +In a moment Captain Eli was sitting on the side of his bunk, listening +intently. Again came the cry. The window toward the sea was slightly +open, and he heard it plainly. +</P> + +<P> +"Cap'n!" said he, and at the word Captain Cephas was sitting on the +side of his bunk, listening. He knew from his companion's attitude, +plainly visible in the light of a lantern which hung on a hook at the +other end of the room, that he had been awakened to listen. Again came +the cry. +</P> + +<P> +"That's distress at sea," said Captain Cephas. "Harken!" +</P> + +<P> +They listened again for nearly a minute, when the cry was repeated. +</P> + +<P> +"Bounce on deck, boys!" said Captain Cephas, getting out on the floor. +"There's some one in distress off shore." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli jumped to the floor, and began to dress quickly. +</P> + +<P> +"It couldn't be a call from land?" he asked hurriedly. "It don't sound +a bit to you like a boatswain's whistle, does it?" +</P> + +<P> +"No," said Captain Cephas, disdainfully. "It's a call from sea." Then, +seizing a lantern, he rushed down the companionway. +</P> + +<P> +As soon as he was convinced that it was a call from sea, Captain Eli +was one in feeling and action with Captain Cephas. The latter hastily +opened the draughts of the kitchen stove, and put on some wood, and by +the time this was done Captain Eli had the kettle filled and on the +stove. Then they clapped on their caps and their pea-jackets, each +took an oar from a corner in the back hall, and together they ran down +to the beach. +</P> + +<P> +The night was dark, but not very cold, and Captain Cephas had been to +the store that morning in his boat. +</P> + +<P> +Whenever he went to the store, and the weather permitted, he rowed +there in his boat rather than walk. At the bow of the boat, which was +now drawn up on the sand, the two men stood and listened. Again came +the cry from the sea. +</P> + +<P> +"It's something ashore on the Turtle-back Shoal," said Captain Cephas. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," said Captain Eli, "and it's some small craft, fer that cry is +down pretty nigh to the water." +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," said Captain Cephas. "And there's only one man aboard, or else +they'd take turns a-hollerin'." +</P> + +<P> +"He's a stranger," said Captain Eli, "or he wouldn't have tried, even +with a cat-boat, to get in over that shoal on ebb-tide." +</P> + +<P> +As they spoke they ran the boat out into the water and jumped in, each +with an oar. Then they pulled for the Turtle-back Shoal. +</P> + +<P> +Although these two captains were men of fifty or thereabout, they were +as strong and tough as any young fellows in the village, and they +pulled with steady strokes, and sent the heavy boat skimming over the +water, not in a straight line toward the Turtle-back Shoal, but now a +few points in the darkness this way, and now a few points in the +darkness that way, then with a great curve to the south through the +dark night, keeping always near the middle of the only good channel out +of the bay when the tide was ebbing. +</P> + +<P> +Now the cries from seaward had ceased, but the two captains were not +discouraged. +</P> + +<P> +"He's heard the thumpin' of our oars," said Captain Cephas. +</P> + +<P> +"He's listenin', and he'll sing out again if he thinks we're goin' +wrong," said Captain Eli. "Of course he doesn't know anything about +that." +</P> + +<P> +And so when they made the sweep to the south the cry came again, and +Captain Eli grinned. "We needn't to spend no breath hollerin'," said +he. "He'll hear us makin' fer him in a minute." +</P> + +<P> +When they came to head for the shoal they lay on their oars for a +moment, while Captain Cephas turned the lantern in the bow, so that its +light shone out ahead. He had not wanted the shipwrecked person to see +the light when it would seem as if the boat were rowing away from him. +He had heard of castaway people who became so wild when they imagined +that a ship or boat was going away from them that they jumped overboard. +</P> + +<P> +When the two captains reached the shoal, they found there a cat-boat +aground, with one man aboard. His tale was quickly told. He had +expected to run into the little bay that afternoon, but the wind had +fallen, and in trying to get in after dark, and being a stranger, he +had run aground. If he had not been so cold, he said, he would have +been willing to stay there till the tide rose; but he was getting +chilled, and seeing a light not far away, he concluded to call for help +as long as his voice held out. +</P> + +<P> +The two captains did not ask many questions. They helped anchor the +cat-boat, and then they took the man on their boat and rowed him to +shore. He was getting chilled sitting out there doing nothing, and so +when they reached the house they made him some hot grog, and promised +in the morning, when the tide rose, they would go out and help him +bring his boat in. Then Captain Cephas showed the stranger to a bunk, +and they all went to bed. Such experiences had not enough of novelty +to the good captains to keep them awake five minutes. +</P> + +<P> +In the morning they were all up very early, and the stranger, who +proved to be a seafaring man with bright blue eyes, said that, as his +cat-boat seemed to be riding all right at its anchorage, he did not +care to go out after her just yet. Any time during flood-tide would do +for him, and he had some business that he wanted to attend to as soon +as possible. +</P> + +<P> +This suited the two captains very well, for they wished to be on hand +when the little girl discovered her stocking. +</P> + +<P> +"Can you tell me," said the stranger, as he put on his cap, "where I +can find a Mrs. Trimmer, who lives in this village?" +</P> + +<P> +At these words all the sturdy stiffness which, from his youth up, had +characterized the legs of Captain Eli entirely went out of them, and he +sat suddenly upon a bench. For a few moments there was silence. +</P> + +<P> +Then Captain Cephas, who thought some answer should be made to the +question, nodded his head. +</P> + +<P> +"I want to see her as soon as I can," said the stranger. "I have come +to see her on particular business that will be a surprise to her. I +wanted to be here before Christmas began, and that's the reason I took +that cat-boat from Stetford, because I thought I'd come quicker that +way than by land. But the wind fell, as I told you. If either one of +you would be good enough to pilot me to where Mrs. Trimmer lives, or to +any point where I can get a sight of the place, I'd be obliged." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli rose and with hurried but unsteady steps went into the +house (for they had been upon the little piazza), and beckoned to his +friend to follow. The two men stood in the kitchen and looked at each +other. The face of Captain Eli was of the hue of a clam-shell. +</P> + +<P> +"Go with him, cap'n," he said in a hoarse whisper. "I can't do it." +</P> + +<P> +"To your house?" inquired the other. +</P> + +<P> +"Of course. Take him to my house. There ain't no other place where +she is. Take him along." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas's countenance wore an air of the deepest concern, but he +thought that the best thing to do was to get the stranger away. +</P> + +<P> +s they walked rapidly toward Captain Eli's house there was<BR> +very little said by either Captain Cephas or the stranger. The latter +seemed anxious to give Mrs. Trimmer a surprise, and not to say anything +which might enable another person to interfere with his project. +</P> + +<P> +The two men had scarcely stepped upon the piazza when Mrs. Trimmer, who +had been expecting early visitors, opened the door. She was about to +call out "Merry Christmas!" but, her eyes falling upon a stranger, the +words stopped at her lips. First she turned red, then she turned pale, +and Captain Cephas thought she was about to fall. But before she could +do this the stranger had her in his arms. She opened her eyes, which +for a moment she had closed, and, gazing into his face, she put her +arms around his neck. Then Captain Cephas came away, without thinking +of the little girl and the pleasure she would have in discovering her +Christmas stocking. +</P> + +<P> +When he had been left alone, Captain Eli sat down near the kitchen +stove, close to the very kettle which he had filled with water to heat +for the benefit of the man he had helped bring in from the sea, and, +with his elbows on his knees and his fingers in his hair, he darkly +pondered. +</P> + +<P> +"If I'd only slept with my hard-o'-hearin' ear up," he said to himself, +"I'd never have heard it." +</P> + +<P> +In a few moments his better nature condemned this thought. +</P> + +<P> +"That's next to murder," he muttered, "fer he couldn't have kept +himself from fallin' asleep out there in the cold, and when the tide +riz held have been blowed out to sea with this wind. If I hadn't heard +him, Captain Cephas never would, fer he wasn't primed up to wake, as I +was." +</P> + +<P> +But, notwithstanding his better nature, Captain Eli was again saying to +himself, when his friend returned, "If I'd only slept with my other ear +up!" +</P> + +<P> +Like the honest, straightforward mariner he was, Captain Cephas made an +exact report of the facts. "They was huggin' when I left them," he +said, "and I expect they went indoors pretty soon, fer it was too cold +outside. It's an all-fired shame she happened to be in your house, +cap'n, that's all I've got to say about it. It's a thunderin' shame." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli made no answer. He still sat with his elbows on his knees +and his hands in his hair. +</P> + +<P> +"A better course than you laid down fer these Christmas times was never +dotted on a chart," continued Captain Cephas. "From port of sailin' to +port of entry you laid it down clear and fine. But it seems there was +rocks that wasn't marked on the chart." +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," groaned Captain Eli, "there was rocks." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas made no attempt to comfort his friend, but went to work +to get breakfast. +</P> + +<P> +When that meal—a rather silent one—was over, Captain Eli felt better. +"There was rocks," he said, "and not a breaker to show where they lay, +and I struck 'em bow on. So that's the end of that voyage. But I've +tuk to my boats, cap'n, I've tuk to my boats." +</P> + +<P> +"I'm glad to hear you've tuk to your boats," said Captain Cephas, with +an approving glance upon his friend. +</P> + +<P> +About ten minutes afterwards Captain Eli said, "I'm goin' up to my +house." +</P> + +<P> +"By yourself?" said the other. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes, by myself. I'd rather go alone. I don't intend to mind +anything, and I'm goin' to tell her that she can stay there and spend +Christmas,—the place she lives in ain't no place to spend +Christmas,—and she can make the little gal have a good time, and go +'long just as we intended to go 'long—plum-duff and mince-pie all the +same. I can stay here, and you and me can have our Christmas dinner +together, if we choose to give it that name. And if she ain't ready to +go to-morrow, she can stay a day or two longer. It's all the same to +me, if it's the same to you, cap'n." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas having said that it was the same to him, Captain Eli put +on his cap and buttoned up his pea-jacket, declaring that the sooner he +got to his house the better, as she might be thinking that she would +have to move out of it now that things were different. +</P> + +<P> +Before Captain Eli reached his house he saw something which pleased +him. He saw the sea-going stranger, with his back toward him, walking +rapidly in the direction of the village store. +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli quickly entered his house, and in the doorway of the room +where the tree was he met Mrs. Trimmer, beaming brighter than any +morning sun that ever rose. +</P> + +<P> +"Merry Christmas!" she exclaimed, holding out both her hands. "I've +been wondering and wondering when you'd come to bid me `Merry +Christmas'—the merriest Christmas I've ever had." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli took her hands and bid her "Merry Christmas" very gravely. +</P> + +<P> +She looked a little surprised. "What's the matter, Captain Eli?" she +exclaimed. "You don't seem to say that as if you meant it." +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, yes, I do," he answered. "This must be an all-fired—I mean a +thunderin' happy Christmas fer you, Mrs. Trimmer." +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," said she, her face beaming again. "And to think that it should +happen on Christmas day—that this blessed morning, before anything +else happened, my Bob, my only brother, should—" +</P> + +<P> +"Your what!" roared Captain Eli, as if he had been shouting orders in a +raging storm. +</P> + +<P> +Mrs. Trimmer stepped back almost frightened. "My brother," said she. +"Didn't he tell you he was my brother—my brother Bob, who sailed away +a year before I was married, and who has been in Africa and China and I +don't know where? It's so long since I heard that he'd gone into +trading at Singapore that I'd given him up as married and settled in +foreign parts. And here he has come to me as if he'd tumbled from the +sky on this blessed Christmas morning." +</P> + +<P> +Captain Eli made a step forward, his face very much flushed. +</P> + +<P> +"Your brother, Mrs. Trimmer—did you really say it was your brother?" +</P> + +<P> +"Of course it is," said she. "Who else could it be?" Then she paused +for a moment and looked steadfastly at the captain. +</P> + +<P> +"You don't mean to say, Captain Eli," she asked, "that you thought it +was—" +</P> + +<P> +"Yes, I did," said Captain Eli, promptly. +</P> + +<P> +Mrs. Trimmer looked straight in the captain's eyes, then she looked on +the ground. Then she changed color and changed back again. +</P> + +<P> +"I don't understand," she said hesitatingly, "why—I mean what +difference it made." +</P> + +<P> +"Difference!" exclaimed Captain Eli. "It was all the difference +between a man on deck and a man overboard—that's the difference it was +to me. I didn't expect to be talkin' to you so early this Christmas +mornin', but things has been sprung on me, and I can't help it I just +want to ask you one thing: Did you think I was gettin' up this +Christmas tree and the Christmas dinner and the whole business fer the +good of the little gal, and fer the good of you, and fer the good of +Captain Cephas?" +</P> + +<P> +Mrs. Trimmer had now recovered a very fair possession of herself. "Of +course I did," she answered, looking up at him as she spoke. "Who else +could it have been for!" +</P> + +<P> +"Well," said he, "you were mistaken. It wasn't fer any one of you. It +was all fer me—fer my own self." +</P> + +<P> +"You yourself?" said she. "I don't see how." +</P> + +<P> +"But I see how," he answered. "It's been a long time since I wanted to +speak my mind to you, Mrs. Trimmer, but I didn't ever have no chance. +And all these Christmas doin's was got up to give me the chance not +only of speakin' to you, but of showin' my colors better than I could +show them in any other way. Everything went on a-skimmin' till this +mornin', when that stranger that we brought in from the shoal piped up +and asked fer you. Then I went overboard—at least, I thought I +did—and sunk down, down, clean out of soundin's." +</P> + +<P> +"That was too bad, captain," said she, speaking very gently, "after all +your trouble and kindness." +</P> + +<P> +"But I don't know now," he continued, "whether I went overboard or +whether I am on deck. Can you tell me, Mrs. Trimmer?" +</P> + +<P> +She looked up at him. Her eyes were very soft, and her lips trembled +just a little. "It seems to me, captain," she said, "that you are on +deck—if you want to be." +</P> + +<P> +The captain stepped closer to her. "Mrs. Trimmer," said he, "is that +brother of yours comin' back?" +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," she answered, surprised at the sudden question. "He's just gone +up to the store to buy a shirt and some things. He got himself +splashed trying to push his boat off last night." +</P> + +<P> +"Well, then," said Captain Eli, "would you mind tellin' him when he +comes back that you and me's engaged to be married? I don't know +whether I've made a mistake in the lights or not, but would you mind +tellin' him that?" +</P> + +<P> +Mrs. Trimmer looked at him. Her eyes were not so soft as they had +been, but they were brighter. "I'd rather you'd tell him that +yourself," said she. +</P> + +<P> +The little girl sat on the floor near the Christmas tree, just +finishing a large piece of red-and-white candy which she had taken out +of her stocking. "People do hug a lot at Christmas-time," said she to +herself. Then she drew out a piece of blue-and-white candy and began +on that. +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas waited a long time for his friend to return, and at last +he thought it would be well to go and look for him. When he entered +the house he found Mrs. Trimmer sitting on the sofa in the parlor, with +Captain Eli on one side of her and her brother on the other, and each +of them holding one of her hands. +</P> + +<P> +"It looks as if I was in port, don't it?" said Captain Eli to his +astonished friend. "Well, here I am, and here's my fust mate," +inclining his head toward Mrs. Trimmer. "And she's in port too, safe +and sound. And that strange captain on the other side of her, he's her +brother Bob, who's been away for years and years, and is just home from +Madagascar." +</P> + +<P> +"Singapore," amended Brother Bob. +</P> + +<P> +Captain Cephas looked from one to the other of the three occupants of +the sofa, but made no immediate remark. Presently a smile of genial +maliciousness stole over his face, and he asked, "How about the poor +little gal? Have you sent her back to Mrs. Crumley's?" +</P> + +<P> +The little girl came out from behind the Christmas tree, her stocking, +now but half filled, in her hand. "Here I am," she said. "Don't you +want to give me a Christmas hug, Captain Cephas? You and me's the only +ones that hasn't had any." +</P> + +<P> +The Christmas dinner was as truly and perfectly a sailor-cooked meal as +ever was served on board a ship or off it. Captain Cephas had said +that, and when he had so spoken there was no need of further words. +</P> + +<P> +It was nearly dark that afternoon, and they were all sitting around the +kitchen fire, the three seafaring men smoking, and Mrs. Trimmer greatly +enjoying it. There could be no objection to the smell of tobacco in +this house so long as its future mistress enjoyed it. The little girl +sat on the floor nursing a Chinese idol which had been one of her +presents. +</P> + +<P> +"After all," said Captain Eli, meditatively, "this whole business come +out of my sleepin' with my best ear up. Fer if I'd slept with my +hard-o'-hearin' ear up—" Mrs. Trimmer put one finger on his lips. +"All right," said Captain Eli, "I won't say no more. But it would have +been different." +</P> + +<P> +Even now, several years after that Christmas, when there is no Mrs. +Trimmer, and the little girl, who has been regularly adopted by Captain +Eli and his wife, is studying geography, and knows more about latitude +and longitude than her teacher at school, Captain Eli has still a +slight superstitious dread of sleeping with his best ear uppermost. +</P> + +<P> +"Of course it's the most all-fired nonsense," he says to himself over +and over again. Nevertheless, he feels safer when it is his +"hard-o'-hearin' ear" that is not upon the pillow. +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<A NAME="chap05"></A> +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +LOVE BEFORE BREAKFAST +</H3> + +<P> +I was still a young man when I came into the possession of an excellent +estate. This consisted of a large country house, surrounded by lawns, +groves, and gardens, and situated not far from the flourishing little +town of Boynton. Being an orphan with no brothers or sisters, I set up +here a bachelor's hall, in which, for two years, I lived with great +satisfaction and comfort, improving my grounds and furnishing my house. +When I had made all the improvements which were really needed, and +feeling that I now had a most delightful home to come back to, I +thought it would be an excellent thing to take a trip to Europe, give +my mind a run in fresh fields, and pick up a lot of bric-a-brac and +ideas for the adornment and advantage of my house and mind. +</P> + +<P> +It was the custom of the residents in my neighborhood who owned houses +and travelled in the summer to let their houses during their absence, +and my business agent and myself agreed that this would be an excellent +thing for me to do. If the house were let to a suitable family it +would yield me a considerable income, and the place would not present +on my return that air of retrogression and desolation which I might +expect if it were left unoccupied and in charge of a caretaker. +</P> + +<P> +My agent assured me that I would have no trouble whatever in letting my +place, for it offered many advantages and I expected but a reasonable +rent. I desired to leave everything just as it stood, house, +furniture, books, horses, cows, and poultry, taking with me only my +clothes and personal requisites, and I desired tenants who would come +in bringing only their clothes and personal requisites, which they +could quietly take away with them when their lease should expire and I +should return home. +</P> + +<P> +In spite, however, of the assurances of the agent, it was not easy to +let my place. The house was too large for some people, too small for +others, and while some applicants had more horses than I had stalls in +my stable, others did not want even the horses I would leave. I had +engaged my steamer passage, and the day for my departure drew near, and +yet no suitable tenants had presented themselves. I had almost come to +the conclusion that the whole matter would have to be left in the hands +of my agent, for I had no intention whatever of giving up my projected +travels, when early one afternoon some people came to look at the +house. Fortunately I was at home, and I gave myself the pleasure of +personally conducting them about the premises. It was a pleasure, +because as soon as I comprehended the fact that these applicants +desired to rent my house I wished them to have it. +</P> + +<P> +The family consisted of an elderly gentleman and his wife, with a +daughter of twenty or thereabout. This was a family that suited me +exactly. Three in number, no children, people of intelligence and +position, fond of the country, and anxious for just such a place as I +offered them—what could be better? +</P> + +<P> +The more I walked about and talked with these good people and showed +them my possessions, the more I desired that the young lady should take +my house. Of course her parents were included in this wish, but it was +for her ears that all my remarks were intended, although sometimes +addressed to the others, and she was the tenant I labored to obtain. I +say "labored" advisedly, because I racked my brain to think of +inducements which might bring them to a speedy and favorable decision. +</P> + +<P> +Apart from the obvious advantages of the arrangement, it would be a +positive delight to me during my summer wanderings in Europe to think +that that beautiful girl would be strolling through my grounds, +enjoying my flowers, and sitting with her book in the shady nooks I had +made so pleasant, lying in my hammocks, spending her evening hours in +my study, reading my books, writing at my desk, and perhaps musing in +my easy-chair. Before these applicants appeared it had sometimes +pained me to imagine strangers in my home; but no such thought crossed +my mind in regard to this young lady, who, if charming in the house and +on the lawn, grew positively entrancing when she saw my Jersey cows and +my two horses, regarding them with an admiration which even surpassed +my own. +</P> + +<P> +Long before we had completed the tour of inspection I had made up my +mind that this young lady should come to live in my house. If +obstacles should show themselves they should be removed. I would tear +down, I would build, I would paper and paint, I would put in all sorts +of electric bells, I would reduce the rent until it suited their +notions exactly, I would have my horses' tails banged if she liked that +kind of tails better than long ones—I would do anything to make them +definitely decide to take the place before they left me. I trembled to +think of her going elsewhere and giving other householders a chance to +tempt her. She had looked at a good many country houses, but it was +quite plain that none of them had pleased her so well as mine. +</P> + +<P> +I left them in my library to talk the matter over by themselves, and in +less than ten minutes the young lady herself came out on the lawn to +tell me that her father and mother had decided to take the place and +would like to speak with me. +</P> + +<P> +"I am so glad," she said as we went in. "I am sure I shall enjoy every +hour of our stay here. It is so different from anything we have yet +seen." +</P> + +<P> +When everything had been settled I wanted to take them again over the +place and point out a lot of things I had omitted. I particularly +wanted to show them some lovely walks in the woods. But there was no +time, for they had to catch a train. +</P> + +<P> +Her name was Vincent—Cora Vincent, as I discovered from her mother's +remarks. +</P> + +<P> +As soon as they departed I had my mare saddled and rode into town to +see my agent. I went into his office exultant. +</P> + +<P> +"I've let my house," I said, "and I want you to make out the lease and +have everything fixed and settled as soon as possible. This is the +address of my tenants." +</P> + +<P> +The agent asked me a good many questions, being particularly anxious to +know what rent had been agreed upon. +</P> + +<P> +"Heavens!" he exclaimed, when I mentioned the sum, "that is ever so +much less than I told you you could get. I am in communication now +with a party whom I know would pay you considerably more than these +people. Have you definitely settled with them? Perhaps it is not too +late to withdraw." +</P> + +<P> +"Withdraw!" I cried. "Never! They are the only tenants I want. I was +determined to get them, and I think I must have lowered the rent four +or five times in the course of the afternoon. I took a big slice out +of it before I mentioned the sum at all. You see," said I, very +impressively, "these Vincents exactly suit me." And then I went on to +state fully the advantages of the arrangement, omitting, however, any +references to my visions of Miss Vincent swinging in my hammocks or +musing in my study-chair. +</P> + +<P> +It was now May 15, and my steamer would sail on the twenty-first. The +intervening days I employed, not in preparing for my travels, but in +making every possible arrangement for the comfort and convenience of my +incoming tenants. The Vincents did not wish to take possession until +June 1, and I was sorry they had not applied before I had engaged my +passage, for in that case I would have selected a later date. A very +good steamer sailed on June 3, and it would have suited me just as well. +</P> + +<P> +Happening to be in New York one day, I went to the Vincents' city +residence to consult with them in regard to some awnings which I +proposed putting up at the back of the house. I found no one at home +but the old gentleman, and it made no difference to him whether the +awnings were black and brown or red and yellow. I cordially invited +him to come out before I left, and bring his family, that they might +look about the place to see if there was anything they would like to +have done which had not already been attended to. It was so much +better, I told him, to talk over these matters personally with the +owner than with an agent in his absence. Agents were often very +unwilling to make changes. Mr. Vincent was a very quiet and +exceedingly pleasant elderly gentleman, and thanked me very much for my +invitation, but said he did not see how he could find the time to get +out to my house before I sailed. I did not like to say that it was not +at all necessary for him to neglect his affairs in order to accompany +his family to my place, but I assured him that if any of them wished to +go out at any time before they took possession they must feel at +perfect liberty to do so. +</P> + +<P> +I mentioned this matter to my agent, suggesting that if he happened to +be in New York he might call on the Vincents and repeat my invitation. +It was not likely that the old gentleman would remember to mention it +to his wife and daughter, and it was really important that everything +should be made satisfactory before I left. +</P> + +<P> +"It seems to me," he said, smiling a little grimly, "that the Vincents +had better be kept away from your house until you have gone. If you do +anything more to it you may find out that it would have been more +profitable to have shut it up while you are away." +</P> + +<P> +He did call, however, partly because I wished him to and partly because +he was curious to see the people I was so anxious to install in my +home, and to whom he was to be my legal representative. He reported +the next day that he had found no one at home but Miss Vincent, and +that she had said that she and her mother would be very glad to come +out the next week and go over the place before they took possession. +</P> + +<P> +"Next week!" I exclaimed. "I shall be gone then!" +</P> + +<P> +"But I shall be here," said Mr. Barker, "and I'll show them about and +take their suggestions." +</P> + +<P> +This did not suit me at all. It annoyed me very much to think of +Barker showing Miss Vincent about my place. He was a good-looking +young man and not at all backward in his manners. +</P> + +<P> +"After all," said I, "I suppose that everything that ought to be done +has been done. I hope you told her that." +</P> + +<P> +"Of course not," said he. "That would have been running dead against +your orders. Besides, it's my business to show people about places. I +don't mind it." +</P> + +<P> +This gave me an unpleasant and uneasy feeling. I wondered if Mr. +Barker were the agent I ought to have, and if a middle-aged man with a +family and more experience might not be better able to manage my +affairs. +</P> + +<P> +"Barker," said I, a little later, "there will be no use of your going +every month to the Vincents to collect their rent. I shall write to +Mr. Vincent to pay as he pleases. He can send a check monthly or at +the end of the season, as it may be convenient. He is perfectly +responsible, and I would much prefer to have the money in a lump when I +come back." +</P> + +<P> +Barker grinned. "All right," said he, "but that's not the way to do +business, you know." +</P> + +<P> +I may have been mistaken, but I fancied that I saw in my agent's face +an expression which indicated that he intended to call on the first day +of each month, on the pretext of telling Vincent that it was not +necessary to pay the rent at any particular time, and that he also +proposed to make many other intervening visits to inquire if repairs +were needed. This might have been a good deal to get out of his +expression, but I think I could have got more if I had thought longer. +</P> + +<P> +On the day before that on which I was to sail, my mind was in such a +disturbed condition that I could not attend to my packing or anything +else. It almost enraged me to think that I was deliberately leaving +the country ten days before my tenants would come to my house. There +was no reason why I should do this. There were many reasons why I +should not. There was Barker. I was now of the opinion that he would +personally superintend the removal of the Vincents and their +establishment to my home. I remembered that the only suggestion he had +made about the improvement of the place had been the construction of a +tennis-court. I knew that he was a champion player. Confound it! +What a dreadful mistake I had made in selecting such a man for my +house-agent. With my mind's eye I could already see Miss Vincent and +Barker selecting a spot for tennis and planning the arrangements of the +court. +</P> + +<P> +I took the first train to New York and went directly to the steamboat +office. It is astonishing how many obstacles can be removed from a +man's path if he will make up his mind to give them a good kick. I +found that my steamer was crowded. The applications for passage +exceeded the accommodations, and the agent was delighted to transfer me +to the steamer that sailed on June 3. I went home exultant. Barker +drove over in the evening to take his last instructions, and a blank +look came over his face when I told him that business had delayed my +departure, and that I should not sail the next day. If I had told him +that part of that business was the laying out of a tennis-court he +might have looked blanker. +</P> + +<P> +Of course the date of my departure did not concern the Vincents, +provided the house was vacated by June 1, and I did not inform them of +the change in my plans, but when the mother and daughter came out the +next week they were much surprised to find me waiting to receive them +instead of Barker. I hope that they were also pleased, and I am sure +that they had every reason to be so. Mrs. Vincent, having discovered +that I was a most complacent landlord, accommodated herself easily to +my disposition and made a number of minor requirements, all of which I +granted without the slightest hesitation. I was delighted at last to +put her into the charge of my housekeeper, and when the two had betaken +themselves to the bedrooms I invited Miss Vincent to come out with me +to select a spot for a tennis-court. The invitation was accepted with +alacrity, for tennis, she declared, was a passion with her. +</P> + +<P> +The selection of that tennis-court took nearly an hour, for there were +several good places for one and it was hard to make a selection; +besides, I could not lose the opportunity of taking Miss Vincent into +the woods and showing her the walks I had made and the rustic seats I +had placed in pleasant nooks. Of course she would have discovered +these, but it was a great deal better for her to know all about them +before she came. At last Mrs. Vincent sent a maid to tell her daughter +that it was time to go for the train, and the court had not been +definitely planned. +</P> + +<P> +The next day I went to Miss Vincent's house with a plan of the grounds, +and she and I talked it over until the matter was settled. It was +necessary to be prompt about this, I explained, as there would be a +great deal of levelling and rolling to be done. +</P> + +<P> +I also had a talk with the old gentleman about books. There were +several large boxes of my books in New York which I had never sent out +to my country house. Many of these I thought might be interesting to +him, and I offered to have them taken out and left at his disposal. +When he heard the titles of some of the books in the collection he was +much interested, but insisted that before he made use of them they +should be catalogued, as were the rest of my effects. I hesitated a +moment, wondering if I could induce Barker to come to New York and +catalogue four big boxes of books, when, to my surprise, Miss Vincent +incidentally remarked that if they were in any place where she could +get at them she would be pleased to help catalogue them; that sort of +thing was a great pleasure to her. Instantly I proposed that I should +send the books to the Vincent house, that they should there be taken +out so that Mr. Vincent could select those he might care to read during +the summer, that I would make a list of these, and if Vincent would +assist me I would be grateful for the kindness, and those that were not +desired could be returned to the storehouse. +</P> + +<P> +What a grand idea was this! I had been internally groaning because I +could think of no possible pretence, for further interviews with Miss +Vincent, and here was something better than I could have imagined. Her +father declared that he could not put me to so much trouble, but I +would listen to none of his words, and the next morning my books were +spread over his library floor. +</P> + +<P> +The selection and cataloguing of the volumes desired occupied the +mornings of three days. The old gentleman's part was soon done, but +there were many things in the books which were far more interesting to +me than their titles, and to which I desired to draw Miss Vincent's +attention. All this greatly protracted our labors. She was not only a +beautiful girl, but her intelligence and intellectual grasp were +wonderful. I could not help telling her what a great pleasure it would +be to me to think, while wandering in foreign lands, that such an +appreciative family would be enjoying my books and my place. +</P> + +<P> +"You are so fond of your house and everything you have," said she, +"that we shall almost feel as if we were depriving you of your rights. +But I suppose that Italian lakes and the Alps will make you forget for +a time even your beautiful home." +</P> + +<P> +"Not if you are in it," I longed to say, but I restrained myself. I +did not believe that it was possible for me to be more in love with +this girl than I was at that moment, but, of course, it would be the +rankest stupidity to tell her so. To her I was simply her father's +landlord. +</P> + +<P> +I went to that house the next day to see that the boxes were +properly repacked, and I actually went the next day to see if the right +boxes had gone into the country, and the others back to the storehouse. +The first day I saw only the father. The second day it was the mother +who assured me that everything had been properly attended to. I began +to feel that if I did not wish a decided rebuff I would better not make +any more pretences of business at the Vincent house. +</P> + +<P> +There were affairs of my own which should have been attended to, and I +ought to have gone home and attended to them, but I could not bear to +do so. There was no reason to suppose she would go out there before +the first of June. +</P> + +<P> +Thinking over the matter many times, I came to the conclusion that if I +could see her once more I would be satisfied. Then I would go away, +and carry her image with me into every art-gallery, over every glacier, +and under every lovely sky that I should enjoy abroad, hoping all the +time that, taking my place, as it were, in my home, and making my +possessions, in a measure, her own, she would indirectly become so well +acquainted with me that when I returned I might speak to her without +shocking her. +</P> + +<P> +To obtain this final interview there was but one way. I had left my +house on Saturday, the Vincents would come on the following Monday, and +I would sail on Wednesday. I would go on Tuesday to inquire if they +found everything to their satisfaction. This would be a very proper +attention from a landlord about to leave the country. +</P> + +<P> +When I reached Boynton I determined to walk to my house, for I did not +wish to encumber myself with a hired vehicle. I might be asked to stay +to luncheon. A very strange feeling came over me as I entered my +grounds. They were not mine. For the time being they belonged to +somebody else. I was merely a visitor or a trespasser if the Vincents +thought proper so to consider me. If they did not like people to walk +on the grass I had no right to do it. +</P> + +<P> +None of my servants had been left on the place, and the maid who came +to the door informed me that Mr. Vincent had gone to New York that +morning, and that Mrs. Vincent and her daughter were out driving. I +ventured to ask if she thought they would soon return, and she answered +that she did not think they would, as they had gone to Rock Lake, +which, from the way they talked about it, must be a long way off. +</P> + +<P> +Rock Lake! When I had driven over there with my friends, we had taken +luncheon at the inn and returned in the afternoon. And what did they +know of Rock Lake? Who had told them of it? That officious Barker, of +course. +</P> + +<P> +"Will you leave a message, sir?" said the maid, who, of course, did not +know me. +</P> + +<P> +"No," said I, and as I still stood gazing at the piazza floor, she +remarked that if I wished to call again she would go out and speak to +the coachman and ask him if anything had been said to him about the +time of the party's return. +</P> + +<P> +Worse and worse! Their coachman had not driven them! Some one who +knew the country had been their companion. They were not acquainted in +the neighborhood, and there could not be a shadow of a doubt that it +was that obtrusive Barker who had indecently thrust himself upon them +on the very next day after their arrival, and had thus snatched from me +this last interview upon which I had counted so earnestly. +</P> + +<P> +I had no right to ask any more questions. I left no message nor any +name, and I had no excuse for saying I would call again. +</P> + +<P> +I got back to my hotel without having met any one whom I knew, and that +night I received a note from Barker, stating that he had fully intended +coming to the steamer to see me off, but that an engagement would +prevent him. He sent, however, his best good wishes for my safe +passage, and assured me that he would keep me fully informed of the +state of my affairs on this side. +</P> + +<P> +"Engagement!" I exclaimed. "Is he going to drive with her again +to-morrow?" +</P> + +<P> +My steamer sailed at two o'clock the next day, and after an early +breakfast I went to the company's office to see if I could dispose of +my ticket. It had become impossible, I told the agent, for me to leave +America at present. He said it was a very late hour to sell my ticket, +but that he would do what he could, and if an applicant turned up he +would give him my room and refund the money. He wanted me to change to +another date, but I declined to do this. I was not able to say when I +should sail. +</P> + +<P> +I now had no plan of action. All I knew was that I could not leave +America without finding out something definite about this Barker +business. That is to say, if it should be made known to me that +instead of attending to my business, sending a carpenter to make +repairs, if such were necessary, or going personally to the plumber to +make sure that that erratic personage would give his attention to any +pipes in regard to which Mr. Vincent might have written, Barker should +mingle in sociable relations with my tenants, and drive or play tennis +with the young lady of the house, then would I immediately have done +with him. I would withdraw my business from his hands and place it in +those of old Mr. Poindexter. More than that, it might be my duty to +warn Miss Vincent's parents against Barker. I did not doubt that he +was a very good house and land-agent, but in selecting him as such I +had no idea of introducing him to the Vincents in a social way. In +fact, the more I thought about it the more I became convinced that if +ever I mentioned Barker to my tenants it would be to warn them against +him. From certain points of view he was actually a dangerous man. +</P> + +<P> +This, however, I would not do until I found my agent was really +culpable. To discover what Barker had done, what he was doing, and +what he intended to do, was now my only business in life. Until I had +satisfied myself on these points I could not think of starting out upon +my travels. +</P> + +<P> +Now that I had determined I would not start for Europe until I had +satisfied myself that Mr. Barker was contenting himself with attending +to my business, and not endeavoring to force himself into social +relations with my tenants, I was anxious that the postponement of my +journey should be unknown to my friends and acquaintances, and I was, +therefore, very glad to see in a newspaper, published on the afternoon +of the day of my intended departure, my name among the list of +passengers who had sailed upon the Mnemonic. For the first time I +commended the super-enterprise of a reporter who gave more attention to +the timeliness of his news than to its accuracy. +</P> + +<P> +I was stopping at a New York hotel, but I did not wish to stay there. +Until I felt myself ready to start on my travels the neighborhood of +Boynton would suit me better than anywhere else. I did not wish to go +to the town itself, for Barker lived there, and I knew many of the +townspeople; but there were farmhouses not far away where I might spend +a week. After considering the matter, I thought of something that +might suit me. About three miles from my house, on an unfrequented +road, was a mill which stood at the end of an extensive sheet of water, +in reality a mill-pond, but commonly called a lake. The miller, an old +man, had recently died, and his house near by was occupied by a +newcomer whom I had never seen. If I could get accommodations there it +would suit me exactly. I left the train two stations below Boynton and +walked over to the mill. +</P> + +<P> +The country-folk in my neighborhood are always pleased to take summer +boarders if they can get them, and the miller and his wife were glad to +give me a room, not imagining that I was the owner of a good house not +far away. The place suited my requirements very well. It was near +her, and I might live here for a time unnoticed, but what I was going +to do with my opportunity I did not know. Several times the conviction +forced itself upon me that I should get up at once and go to Europe by +the first steamer, and so show myself that I was a man of sense. +</P> + +<P> +This conviction was banished on the second afternoon of my stay at the +mill. I was sitting under a tree in the orchard near the house, +thinking and smoking my pipe, when along the road which ran by the side +of the lake came Mr. Vincent on my black horse General and his daughter +on my mare Sappho. Instinctively I pulled my straw hat over my eyes, +but this precaution was not necessary. They were looking at the +beautiful lake, with its hills and overhanging trees, and saw me not! +</P> + +<P> +When the very tip of Sappho's tail had melted into the foliage of the +road, I arose to my feet and took a deep breath of the happy air. I +had seen her, and it was with her father she was riding. +</P> + +<P> +I do not believe I slept a minute that night through thinking of her, +and feeling glad that I was near her, and that she had been riding with +her father. +</P> + +<P> +When the early dawn began to break an idea brighter than the dawn broke +upon me: I would get up and go nearer to her. It is amazing how much +we lose by not getting up early on the long summer days. How beautiful +the morning might be on this earth I never knew until I found myself +wandering by the edge of my woods and over my lawn with the tender +gray-blue sky above me and all the freshness of the grass and flowers +and trees about me, the birds singing among the branches, and she +sleeping sweetly somewhere within that house with its softly defined +lights and shadows. How I wished I knew what room she occupied! +</P> + +<P> +The beauties and joys of that hour were lost to every person on the +place, who were all, no doubt, in their soundest sleep. I did not even +see a dog. Quietly and stealthily stepping from bush to hedge, I went +around the house, and as I drew near the barn I fancied I could hear +from a little room adjoining it the snores of the coachman. The lazy +rascal would probably not awaken for two or three hours yet, but I +would ran no risks, and in half an hour I had sped away. +</P> + +<P> +Now I knew exactly why I was staying at the house of the miller. I was +doing so in order that I might go early in the mornings to my own home, +in which the girl I loved lay dreaming, and that for the rest of the +day and much of the night I might think of her. +</P> + +<P> +"What place in Europe," I said to myself, "could be so beautiful, so +charming, and so helpful to reflection as this sequestered lake, these +noble trees, these stretches of undulating meadow?" +</P> + +<P> +Even if I should care to go abroad, a month or two later would answer +all my purposes. Why had I ever thought of spending five months away? +</P> + +<P> +There was a pretty stream which ran from the lake and wended its way +through a green and shaded valley, and here, with a rod, I wandered and +fished and thought. The miller had boats, and in one of these I rowed +far up the lake where it narrowed into a creek, and between the high +hills which shut me out from the world I would float and think. +</P> + +<P> +Every morning, soon after break of day, I went to my home and wandered +about my grounds. If it rained I did not mind that. I like a summer +rain. +</P> + +<P> +Day by day I grew bolder. Nobody in that household thought of getting +up until seven o'clock. For two hours, at least, I could ramble +undisturbed through my grounds, and much as I had once enjoyed these +grounds, they never afforded me the pleasure they gave me now. In +these happy mornings I felt all the life and spirits of a boy. I went +into my little field and stroked the sleek sides of my cows as they +nibbled the dewy grass. I even peeped through the barred window of +Sappho's box and fed her, as I had been used to doing, with bunches of +clover. I saw that the young chickens were flourishing. I went into +the garden and noted the growth of the vegetables, feeling glad that +she would have so many fine strawberries and tender peas. +</P> + +<P> +I had not the slightest doubt that she was fond of flowers, and for her +sake now, as I used to do for my own sake, I visited the flower beds +and borders. Not far from the house there was a cluster of +old-fashioned pinks which I was sure were not doing very well. They +had been there too long, perhaps, and they looked stunted and weak. In +the miller's garden I had noticed great beds of these pinks, and I +asked his wife if I might have some, and she, considering them as mere +wild flowers, said I might have as many as I liked. She might have +thought I wanted simply the blossoms, but the next morning I went over +to my house with a basket filled with great matted masses of the plants +taken up with the roots and plenty of earth around them, and after +twenty minutes' work in my own bed of pinks, I had taken out all the +old plants and filled their places with fresh, luxuriant masses of buds +and leaves and blossoms. How glad she would be when she saw the fresh +life that had come to that flower-bed! With light footsteps I went +away, not feeling the weight of the basket filled with the old plants +and roots. +</P> + +<P> +The summer grew and strengthened, and the sun rose earlier, but as that +had no effect upon the rising of the present inhabitants of my place, +it gave me more time for my morning pursuits. Gradually I constituted +myself the regular flower-gardener of the premises. How delightful the +work was, and how foolish I thought I had been never to think of doing +this thing for myself! but no doubt it was because I was doing it for +her that I found it so pleasant. +</P> + +<P> +Once again I had seen Miss Vincent. It was in the afternoon, and I had +rowed myself to the upper part of the lake, where, with the high hills +and the trees on each side of me, I felt as if I were alone in the +world. Floating, idly along, with my thoughts about three miles away, +I heard the sound of oars, and looking out on the open part of the +lake, I saw a boat approaching. The miller was rowing, and in the +stern sat an elderly gentleman and a young lady. I knew them in an +instant: they were Mr. and Miss Vincent. +</P> + +<P> +With a few vigorous strokes I shot myself into the shadows, and rowed +up the stream into the narrow stretches among the lily-pads, under a +bridge, and around a little wooded point, where I ran the boat ashore +and sprang upon the grassy bank. Although I did not believe the miller +would bring them as far as this, I went up to a higher spot and watched +for half an hour; but I did not see them again. How relieved I was! +It would have been terribly embarrassing had they discovered me. And +how disappointed I was that the miller turned back so soon! +</P> + +<P> +I now extended the supervision of my grounds. I walked through the +woods, and saw how beautiful they were in the early dawn. I threw +aside the fallen twigs and cut away encroaching saplings, which were +beginning to encumber the paths I had made, and if I found a bough +which hung too low I cut it off. There was a great beech-tree, between +which and a dogwood I had the year before suspended a hammock. In +passing this, one morning, I was amazed to see a hammock swinging from +the hooks I had put in the two trees. This was a retreat which I had +supposed no one else would fancy or even think of! In the hammock was +a fan—a common Japanese fan. For fifteen minutes I stood looking at +that hammock, every nerve a-tingle. Then I glanced around. The spot +had been almost unfrequented since last summer. Little bushes, weeds, +and vines had sprung up here and there between the two trees. There +were dead twigs and limbs lying about, and the short path to the main +walk was much overgrown. +</P> + +<P> +I looked at my watch. It was a quarter to six. I had yet a good hour +for work, and with nothing but my pocket-knife and my hands I began to +clear away the space about that hammock. When I left it, it looked as +it used to look when it was my pleasure to lie there and swing and read +and reflect. +</P> + +<P> +To approach this spot it was not necessary to go through my grounds, +for my bit of woods adjoined a considerable stretch of forest-land, and +in my morning walks from the mill I often used a path through these +woods. The next morning when I took this path I was late because I had +unfortunately overslept myself. When I reached the hammock it wanted +fifteen minutes to seven o'clock. It was too late for me to do +anything, but I was glad to be able to stay there even for a few +minutes, to breathe that air, to stand on that ground, to touch that +hammock. I did more than that. Why shouldn't I? I got into it. It +was a better one than that I had hung there. It was delightfully +comfortable. At this moment, gently swinging in that woodland +solitude, with the sweet odors of the morning all about me, I felt +myself nearer to her than I had ever been before. +</P> + +<P> +But I knew I must not revel in this place too long. I was on the point +of rising to leave when I heard approaching footsteps. My breath +stopped. Was I at last to be discovered? This was what came of my +reckless security. But perhaps the person, some workman most likely, +would pass without noticing me. To remain quiet seemed the best +course, and I lay motionless. +</P> + +<P> +But the person approaching turned into the little pathway. The +footsteps came nearer. I sprang from the hammock. Before me was Miss +Vincent! +</P> + +<P> +What was my aspect I know not, but I have no doubt I turned fiery red. +She stopped suddenly, but she did not turn red. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, Mr. Ripley," she exclaimed, "good morning! You must excuse me. I +did not know—" +</P> + +<P> +That she should have had sufficient self-possession to say good morning +amazed me. Her whole appearance, in fact, amazed me. There seemed to +be something wanting in her manner. I endeavored to get myself into +condition. +</P> + +<P> +"You must be surprised," I said, "to see me here. You supposed I was +in Europe, but—" +</P> + +<P> +As I spoke I made a couple of steps toward her, but suddenly stopped. +One of my coat buttons had caught in the meshes of the hammock. It was +confoundedly awkward. I tried to loosen the button, but it was badly +entangled. Then I desperately pulled at it to tear it off. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, don't do that," she said. "Let me unfasten it for you." And +taking the threads of the hammock in one of her little hands and the +button in the other, she quickly separated them. "I should think +buttons would be very inconvenient things—at least, in hammocks," she +said smiling. "You see, girls don't have any such trouble." +</P> + +<P> +I could not understand her manner. She seemed to take my being there +as a matter of course. +</P> + +<P> +"I must beg a thousand pardons for this—this trespass," I said. +</P> + +<P> +"Trespass!" said she, with a smile. "People don't trespass on their +own land—" +</P> + +<P> +"But it is not my land," said I. "It is your father's for the time +being. I have no right here whatever. I do not know how to explain, +but you must think it very strange to find me here when you supposed I +had started for Europe." +</P> + +<P> +"Oh! I knew you had not started for Europe," said she, "because I have +seen you working in the grounds—" +</P> + +<P> +"Seen me!" I interrupted. "Is it possible?" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, yes," said she. "I don't know how long you had been coming when I +first saw you, but when I found that fresh bed of pinks all +transplanted from somewhere, and just as lovely as they could be, +instead of the old ones, I spoke to the man; but he did not know +anything about it, and said he had not had time to do anything to the +flowers, whereas I had been giving him credit for ever so much weeding +and cleaning up. Then I supposed that Mr. Barker, who is just as kind +and attentive as he can be, had done it; but I could hardly believe he +was the sort of man to come early in the morning and work out of +doors,"—("Oh, how I wish he had come!" I thought. "If I had caught +him here working among the flowers!"),—"and when he came that +afternoon to play tennis I found that he had been away for two days, +and could not have planted the pinks. So I simply got up early one +morning and looked out, and there I saw you, with your coat off, +working just as hard as ever you could." +</P> + +<P> +I stepped back, my mind for a moment a perfect blank. +</P> + +<P> +"What could you have thought of me?" I exclaimed presently. +</P> + +<P> +"Really, at first I did not know what to think," said she. "Of course +I did not know what had detained you in this country, but I remembered +that I had heard that you were a very particular person about your +flowers and shrubs and grounds, and that most likely you thought they +would be better taken care of if you kept an eye on them, and that when +you found there was so much to do you just went to work and did it. I +did not speak of this to anybody, because if you did not wish it to be +known that you were taking care of the grounds it was not my business +to tell people about it. But yesterday, when I found this place where +I had hung my hammock so beautifully cleared up and made so nice and +clean and pleasant in every way, I thought I must come down to tell you +how much obliged I am, and also that you ought not to take so much +trouble for us. If you think the grounds need more attention, I will +persuade my father to hire another man, now and then, to work about the +place. Really, Mr. Ripley, you ought not to have to—" +</P> + +<P> +I was humbled, abashed. She had seen me at my morning devotions, and +this was the way she interpreted them. She considered me an overnice +fellow who was so desperately afraid his place would be injured that he +came sneaking around every morning to see if any damage had been done +and to put things to rights. +</P> + +<P> +She stood for a moment as if expecting me to speak, brushed a buzzing +fly from her sleeve, and then, looking at me with a gentle smile, she +turned a little as if she were about to leave. +</P> + +<P> +I could not let her go without telling her something. Her present +opinion of me must not rest in her mind another minute. And yet, what +story could I devise? How, indeed, could I devise anything with which +to deceive a girl who spoke and looked at me as this girl did? I could +not do it. I must rush away speechless and never see her again, or I +must tell her all. I came a little nearer to her. +</P> + +<P> +"Miss Vincent," said I, "you do not understand at all why I am +here—why I have been here so much—why I did not go to Europe. The +truth is, I could not leave. I do not wish to be away; I want to come +here and live here always—" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, dear!" she interrupted, "of course it is natural that you should +not want to tear yourself away from your lovely home. It would be very +hard for us to go away now, especially for father and me, for we have +grown to love this place so much. But if you want us to leave, I dare +say—" +</P> + +<P> +"I want you to leave!" I exclaimed. "Never! When I say that I want to +live here myself, that my heart will not let me go anywhere else, I +mean that I want you to live here too—you, your mother and +father—that I want—" +</P> + +<P> +Oh, that would be perfectly splendid!" she said. "I have<BR> +ever so often thought that it was a shame that you should be deprived +of the pleasures you so much enjoy, which I see you can find here and +nowhere else. Now, I have a plan which I think will work splendidly. +We are a very small family. Why shouldn't you come here and live with +us? There is plenty of room, and I know father and mother would be +very glad, and you can pay your board, if that would please you better. +You can have the room at the top of the tower for your study and your +smoking den, and the room under it can be your bedroom, so you can be +just as independent as you please of the rest of us, and you can be +living on your own place without interfering with us in the least. In +fact, it would be ever so nice, especially as I am in the habit of +going away to the sea-shore with my aunt every summer for six weeks, +and I was thinking how lonely it would be this year for father and +mother to stay here all by themselves." +</P> + +<P> +The tower and the room under it! For me! What a contemptibly +little-minded and insignificant person she must think me. The words +with which I strove to tell her that I wished to live here as lord, +with her as my queen, would not come. She looked at me for a moment as +I stood on the brink of saying something but not saying it, and then +she turned suddenly toward the hammock. +</P> + +<P> +"Did you see anything of a fan I left here?" she said. "I know I left +it here, but when I came yesterday it was gone. Perhaps you may have +noticed it somewhere—" +</P> + +<P> +Now, the morning before, I had taken that fan home with me. It was an +awkward thing to carry, but I had concealed it under my coat. It was a +contemptible trick, but the fan had her initials on it, and as it was +the only thing belonging to her of which I could possess myself, the +temptation had been too great to resist. As she stood waiting for my +answer there was a light in her eye which illuminated my perceptions. +</P> + +<P> +"Did you see me take that fan?" I asked. +</P> + +<P> +"I did," said she. +</P> + +<P> +"Then you know," I exclaimed, stepping nearer to her, "why it is I did +not leave this country as I intended, why it was impossible for me to +tear myself away from this house, why it is that I have been here every +morning, hovering around and doing the things I have been doing?" +</P> + +<P> +She looked up at me, and with her eyes she said, "How could I help +knowing?" She might have intended to say something with her lips, but +I took my answer from her eyes, and with the quick impulse of a lover I +stopped her speech. +</P> + +<P> +"You have strange ways," she said presently, blushing and gently +pressing back my arm. "I haven't told you a thing." +</P> + +<P> +"Let us tell each other everything now," I cried, and we seated +ourselves in the hammock. +</P> + +<P> +It was a quarter of an hour later and we were still sitting together in +the hammock. +</P> + +<P> +"You may think," said she, "that, knowing what I did, it was very queer +for me to come out to you this morning, but I could not help it. You +were getting dreadfully careless, and were staying so late and doing +things which people would have been bound to notice, especially as +father is always talking about our enjoying the fresh hours of the +morning, that I felt I could not let you go on any longer. And when it +came to that fan business I saw plainly that you must either +immediately start for Europe or—" +</P> + +<P> +"Or what?" I interrupted. +</P> + +<P> +"Or go to my father and regularly engage yourself as a—" +</P> + +<P> +I do not know whether she was going to say "gardener" or not, but it +did not matter. I stopped her. +</P> + +<P> +It was perhaps twenty minutes later, and we were standing together at +the edge of the woods. She wanted me to come to the house to take +breakfast with them. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, I could not do that!" I said. "They would be so surprised. I +should have so much to explain before I could even begin to state my +case." +</P> + +<P> +"Well, then, explain," said she. "You will find father on the front +piazza. He is always there before breakfast, and there is plenty of +time. After all that has been said here, I cannot go to breakfast and +look commonplace while you run away." +</P> + +<P> +"But suppose your father objects?" said I. +</P> + +<P> +"Well, then you will have to go back and take breakfast with your +miller," said she. +</P> + +<P> +I never saw a family so little affected by surprises as those Vincents. +When I appeared on the front piazza the old gentleman did not jump. He +shook hands with me and asked me to sit down, and when I told him +everything he did not even ejaculate, but simply folded his hands +together and looked out over the railing. +</P> + +<P> +"It seemed strange to Mrs. Vincent and myself," he said, "when we first +noticed your extraordinary attachment for our daughter, but, after all, +it was natural enough." +</P> + +<P> +"Noticed it!" I exclaimed. "When did you do that?" +</P> + +<P> +"Very soon," he said. "When you and Cora were cataloguing the books at +my house in town I noticed it and spoke to Mrs. Vincent, but she said +it was nothing new to her, for it was plain enough on the day when we +first met you here that you were letting the house to Cora, and that +she had not spoken of it to me because she was afraid I might think it +wrong to accept the favorable and unusual arrangements you were making +with us if I suspected the reason for them. We talked over the matter, +but, of course, we could do nothing, because there was nothing to do, +and Mrs. Vincent was quite sure you would write to us from Europe. But +when my man Ambrose told me he had seen some one working about the +place in the very early morning, and that, as it was a gentleman, he +supposed it must be the landlord, for nobody else would be doing such +things, Mrs. Vincent and I looked out of the window the next day, and +when we found it was indeed you who were coming here every day, we felt +that the matter was serious and were a good deal troubled. We found, +however, that you were conducting affairs in a very honorable +way,—that you were not endeavoring to see Cora, and that you did not +try to have any secret correspondence with her,—and as we had no right +to prevent you from coming on your grounds, we concluded to remain +quiet until you should take some step which we would be authorized to +notice. Later, when Mr. Barker came and told me that you had not gone +to Europe, and were living with a miller not far from here—" +</P> + +<P> +"Barker!" I cried. "The scoundrel!" +</P> + +<P> +"You are mistaken, sir," said Mr. Vincent. "He spoke with the greatest +kindness of you, and said that as it was evident you had your own +reasons for wishing to stay in the neighborhood, and did not wish the +fact to be known, he had spoken of it to no one but me, and he would +not have done this had he not thought it would prevent embarrassment in +case we should meet." +</P> + +<P> +Would that everlasting Barker ever cease meddling in my affairs? +</P> + +<P> +"Do you suppose," I asked, "that he imagined the reason for my staying +here?" +</P> + +<P> +"I do not know," said the old gentleman, "but after the questions I put +to him I have no doubt he suspected it. I made many inquiries of him +regarding you, your family, habits, and disposition, for this was a +very vital matter to me, sir, and I am happy to inform you that he said +nothing of you that was not good, so I urged him to keep the matter to +himself. I determined, however, that if you continued your morning +visits I should take an early opportunity of accosting you and asking +an explanation." +</P> + +<P> +"And you never mentioned anything of this to your daughter?" said I. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, no," he answered. "We carefully kept everything from her." +</P> + +<P> +"But, my dear sir," said I, rising, "you have given me no answer. You +have not told me whether or not you will accept me as a son-in-law." +</P> + +<P> +He smiled. "Truly," he said, "I have not answered you; but the fact +is, Mrs. Vincent and I have considered the matter so long, and having +come to the conclusion that if you made an honorable and +straightforward proposition, and if Cora were willing to accept you, we +could see no reason to object to—" +</P> + +<P> +At this moment the front door opened and Cora appeared. +</P> + +<P> +"Are you going to stay to breakfast?" she asked. "Because, if you are, +it is ready." +</P> + +<P> +I stayed to breakfast. +</P> + +<P> +I am now living in my own house, not in the two tower rooms, but in the +whole mansion, of which my former tenant, Cora, is now mistress +supreme. Mr. and Mrs. Vincent expect to spend the next summer here and +take care of the house while we are travelling. +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Barker, an excellent fellow and a most thorough business man, still +manages my affairs, and there is nothing on the place that flourishes +so vigorously as the bed of pinks which I got from the miller's wife. +</P> + +<P> +By the way, when I went back to my lodging on that eventful day, the +miller's wife met me at the door. +</P> + +<P> +"I kept your breakfast waitin' for you for a good while," said she, +"but as you didn't come, I supposed you were takin' breakfast in your +own house, and I cleared it away." +</P> + +<P> +"Do you know who I am?" I exclaimed. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, yes, sir," she said. "We did not at first, but when everybody +began to talk about it we couldn't help knowin' it." +</P> + +<P> +"Everybody!" I gasped. "And may I ask what you and everybody said +about me?" +</P> + +<P> +"I think it was the general opinion, sir," said she, "that you were +suspicious of them tenants of yours, and nobody wondered at it, for +when city people gets into the country and on other people's property, +there's no trustin' them out of your sight for a minute." +</P> + +<P> +I could not let the good woman hold this opinion of my tenants, and I +briefly told her the truth. She looked at me with moist admiration in +her eyes. +</P> + +<P> +"I am glad to hear that, sir," said she. "I like it very much. But if +I was you I wouldn't be in a hurry to tell my husband and the people in +the neighborhood about it. They might be a little disappointed at +first, for they had a mighty high opinion of you when they thought that +you was layin' low here to keep an eye on them tenants of yours." +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<A NAME="chap06"></A> +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +THE STAYING POWER OF SIR ROHAN +</H3> + +<P> +During the winter in which I reached my twenty fifth year I lived with +my mother's brother, Dr. Alfred Morris, in Warburton, a small country +town, and I was there beginning the practice of medicine. I had been +graduated in the spring, and my uncle earnestly advised me to come to +him and act as his assistant, which advice, considering the fact that +he was an elderly man, and that I might hope to succeed him in his +excellent practice, was considered good advice by myself and my family. +</P> + +<P> +At this time I practised very little, but learned a great deal, for as +I often accompanied my uncle on his professional visits, I could not +have taken a better postgraduate course. +</P> + +<P> +I had an invitation to spend the Christmas of that year with the +Collingwoods, who had opened their country house, about twelve miles +from Warburton, for the entertainment of a holiday house party. I had +gladly accepted the invitation, and on the day before Christmas I went +to the livery stable in the village to hire a horse and sleigh for the +trip. At the stable I met Uncle Beamish, who had also come to hire a +conveyance. +</P> + +<P> +"Uncle Beamish," as he was generally called in the village, although I +am sure he had no nephews or nieces in the place, was an elderly man +who had retired from some business, I know not what, and was apparently +quite able to live upon whatever income he had. He was a good man, +rather illiterate, but very shrewd. Generous in good works, I do not +think he was fond of giving away money, but his services were at the +call of all who needed them. +</P> + +<P> +I liked Uncle Beamish very much, for he was not only a good +story-teller, but he was willing to listen to my stories, and when I +found he wanted to hire a horse and sleigh to go to the house of his +married sister, with whom he intended to spend Christmas, and that his +sister lived on Upper Hill turnpike, on which road the Collingwood +house was situated, I proposed that we should hire a sleigh together. +</P> + +<P> +"That will suit me," said Uncle Beamish. "There couldn't have been a +better fit if I had been measured for it. Less than half a mile after +you turn into the turnpike, you pass my sister's house. Then you can +drop me and go on to the Collingwoods', which I should say isn't more +than three miles further." +</P> + +<P> +The arrangement was made, a horse and sleigh ordered, and early in the +afternoon we started from Warburton. +</P> + +<P> +The sleighing was good, but the same could not be said of the horse. +He was a big roan, powerful and steady, but entirely too deliberate in +action. Uncle Beamish, however, was quite satisfied with him. +</P> + +<P> +"What you want when you are goin' to take a journey with a horse," said +he, "is stayin' power. Your fast trotter is all very well for a mile +or two, but if I have got to go into the country in winter, give me a +horse like this." +</P> + +<P> +I did not agree with him, but we jogged along quite pleasantly until +the afternoon grew prematurely dark and it began to snow. +</P> + +<P> +"Now," said I, giving the roan a useless cut, "what we ought to have is +a fast horse, so that we may get there before there is a storm." +</P> + +<P> +"No, doctor, you're wrong," said Uncle Beamish. "What we want is a +strong horse that will take us there whether it storms or not, and we +have got him. And who cares for a little snow that won't hurt nobody?" +</P> + +<P> +I did not care for snow, and we turned up our collars and went as +merrily as people can go to the music of slowly jingling sleigh-bells. +</P> + +<P> +The snow began to fall rapidly, and, what was worse, the wind blew +directly in our faces, so that sometimes my eyes were so plastered up +with snowflakes that I could scarcely see how to drive. I never knew +snow to fall with such violence. The roadway in front of us, as far as +I could see it, was soon one unbroken stretch of white from fence to +fence. +</P> + +<P> +"This is the big storm of the season," said Uncle Beamish, "and it is a +good thing we started in time, for if the wind keeps blowin', this road +will be pretty hard to travel in a couple of hours." +</P> + +<P> +In about half an hour the wind lulled a little and I could get a better +view of our surroundings, although I could not see very far through the +swiftly descending snow. +</P> + +<P> +"I was thinkin'," said Uncle Beamish, "that it might be a good idee, +when we get to Crocker's place, to stop a little, and let you warm your +fingers and nose. Crocker's is ruther more than half-way to the pike." +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, I do not want to stop anywhere," I replied quickly. "I am all +right." +</P> + +<P> +Nothing was said for some time, and then Uncle Beamish remarked: +</P> + +<P> +"I don't want to stop any more than you do, but it does seem strange +that we ain't passed Crocker's yit. We could hardly miss his house, it +is so close to the road. This horse is slow, but I tell you one thing, +doctor, he's improvin'. He is goin' better than he did. That's the +way with this kind. It takes them a good while to get warmed up, but +they keep on gettin' fresher instead of tireder." +</P> + +<P> +The big roan was going better, but still we did not reach Crocker's, +which disappointed Uncle Beamish, who wanted to be assured that the +greater part of his journey was over. +</P> + +<P> +"We must have passed it," he said, "when the snow was so blindin'." +</P> + +<P> +I did not wish to discourage him by saying that I did not think we had +yet reached Crocker's, but I believed I had a much better appreciation +of our horse's slowness than he had. +</P> + +<P> +Again the wind began to blow in our faces, and the snow fell faster, +but the violence of the storm seemed to encourage our horse, for his +pace was now greatly increased. +</P> + +<P> +"That's the sort of beast to have," exclaimed Uncle Beamish, +spluttering as the snow blew in his mouth. "He is gettin' his spirits +up just when they are most wanted. We must have passed Crocker's a +good while ago, and it can't be long before we get to the pike. And +it's time we was there, for it's darkenin'." +</P> + +<P> +On and on we went, but still we did not reach the pike. We had lost a +great deal of time during the first part of the journey, and although +the horse was travelling so much better now, his pace was below the +average of good roadsters. +</P> + +<P> +"When we get to the pike," said Uncle Beamish, "you can't miss it, for +this road doesn't cross it. All you've got to do is to turn to the +left, and in ten minutes you will see the lights in my sister's house. +And I'll tell you, doctor, if you would like to stop there for the +night, she'd be mighty glad to have you." +</P> + +<P> +"Much obliged," replied I, "but I shall go on. It's not late yet, and +I can reach the Collingwoods' in good time." +</P> + +<P> +We now drove on in silence, our horse actually arching his neck as he +thumped through the snow. Drifts had begun to form across the road, +but through these he bravely plunged. +</P> + +<P> +"Stayin' power is what we want, doctor!" exclaimed Uncle Beamish. +"Where would your fast trotter be in drifts like these, I'd like to +know? We got the right horse when we got this one, but I wish we had +been goin' this fast all the time." +</P> + +<P> +It grew darker and darker, but at last we saw, not far in front of us, +a light. +</P> + +<P> +"That beats me," said Uncle Beamish. "I don't remember no other house +so near the road. It can't be we ain't passed Crocker's yit! If we +ain't got no further than that, I'm in favor of stoppin'. I'm not +afraid of a snow-storm, but I ain't a fool nuther, and if we haven't +got further than Crocker's it will be foolhardy to try to push on +through the dark and these big drifts, which will be gettin' bigger." +</P> + +<P> +I did not give it up so easily. I greatly wished to` reach my +destination that night. But there were three wills in the party, and +one of them belonged to the horse. Before I had any idea of such a +thing, the animal made a sudden turn,—too sudden for safety,—passed +through a wide gateway, and after a few rapid bounds which, to my +surprise, I could not restrain, he stopped suddenly. +</P> + +<P> +"Hello!" exclaimed Uncle Beamish, peering forward, "here's a barn +door." And he immediately began to throw off the far robe that covered +our knees. +</P> + +<P> +"What are you going to do?" I asked. +</P> + +<P> +"I'm goin' to open the barn door and let the horse go in," said he. +"He seems to want to. I don't know whether this is Crocker's barn or +not. It don't look like it, but I may be mistaken. Anyway, we will +let the horse in, and then go to the house. This ain't no night to be +travellin' any further, doctor, and that is the long and the short of +it. If the people here ain't Crockers, I guess they are Christians!" +</P> + +<P> +I had not much time to consider the situation, for while he had been +speaking, Uncle Beamish had waded through the snow, and finding the +barn door unfastened, had slid it to one side. Instantly the horse +entered the dark barn, fortunately finding nothing in his way. +</P> + +<P> +"Now," said Uncle Beamish, "if we can get somethin' to tie him with, so +that he don't do no mischief, we can leave him here and go up to the +house." I carried a pocket lantern, and quickly lighted it. "By +George!" said Uncle Beamish, as I held up the lantern, "this ain't much +of a barn—it's no more than a wagon-house. It ain't Crocker's—but no +matter; we'll go up to the house. Here is a hitchin'-rope." +</P> + +<P> +We fastened the horse, threw a robe over him, shut the barn door behind +us, and slowly made our way to the back of the house, in which there +was a lighted window. Mounting a little portico, we reached a door, +and were about to knock when it was opened for us. A woman, plainly a +servant, stood in a kitchen, light and warm. +</P> + +<P> +"Come right in," she said. "I heard your bells. Did you put your +horse in the barn?" +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," said Uncle Beamish, "and now we would like to see—" +</P> + +<P> +"All right," interrupted the woman, moving toward an inner door. "Just +wait here for a minute. I'm going up to tell her." +</P> + +<P> +"I don't know this place," said Uncle Beamish, as we stood by the +kitchen stove, "but I expect it belongs to a widow woman." +</P> + +<P> +"What makes you think that?" I asked. +</P> + +<P> +"'Cause she said she was goin' to tell HER. If there had been a man in +the house, she would have gone to tell HIM." +</P> + +<P> +In a few moments the woman returned. +</P> + +<P> +"She says you are to take off your wet things and then go into the +sitting-room. She'll be down in a minute." +</P> + +<P> +I looked at Uncle Beamish, thinking it was his right to make +explanations, but, giving me a little wink, he began to take off his +overcoat. It was plain to perceive that Uncle Beamish desired to +assume that a place of refuge would be offered us. +</P> + +<P> +"It's an awful bad night," he said to the woman, as he sat down to take +off his arctic overshoes. +</P> + +<P> +"It's all that," said she. "You may hang your coats over them chairs. +It won't matter if they do drip on this bare floor. Now, then, come +right into the sitting-room." +</P> + +<P> +In spite of my disappointment, I was glad to be in a warm house, and +hoped we might be able to stay there. I could hear the storm beating +furiously against the window-panes behind the drawn shades. There was +a stove in the sitting-room, and a large lamp. +</P> + +<P> +"Sit down," said the woman. "She will be here in a minute." +</P> + +<P> +"It strikes me," said Uncle Beamish, when we were left alone, "that +somebody is expected in this house, most likely to spend Christmas, and +that we are mistook for them, whoever they are." +</P> + +<P> +"I have the same idea," I replied, "and we must explain as soon as +possible." +</P> + +<P> +"Of course we will do that," said he, "but I can tell you one thing: +whoever is expected ain't comin', for he can't get here. But we've got +to stay here tonight, no matter who comes or doesn't come, and we've +got to be keerful in speakin' to the woman of the house. If she is one +kind of a person, we can offer to pay for lodgin's and horse-feed; but +if she is another kind, we must steer clear of mentionin' pay, for it +will make her angry. You had better leave the explainin' business to +me." +</P> + +<P> +I was about to reply that I was more than willing to do so when the +door opened and a person entered—evidently the mistress of the house. +She was tall and thin, past middle age, and plainly dressed. Her pale +countenance wore a defiant look, and behind her spectacles blazed a +pair of dark eyes, which, after an instant's survey of her visitors, +were fixed steadily upon me. She made but a step into the room, and +stood holding the door. We both rose from our chairs. +</P> + +<P> +"You can sit down again," she said sharply to me. "I don't want you. +Now, sir," she continued, turning to Uncle Beamish, "please come with +me." +</P> + +<P> +Uncle Beamish gave a glance of surprise at me, but he immediately +followed the old lady out of the room, and the door was closed behind +them. +</P> + +<P> +For ten minutes, at least, I sat quietly waiting to see what would +happen next—very much surprised at the remark that had been made to +me, and wondering at Uncle Beamish's protracted absence. Suddenly he +entered the room and closed the door. +</P> + +<P> +"Here's a go!" said he, slapping his leg, but very gently. "We're +mistook the worst kind. We're mistook for doctors." "That is only half +a mistake," said I. "What is the matter, and what can I do?" +</P> + +<P> +"Nothin'," said he, quickly,—"that is, nothin' your own self. Just +the minute she got me outside that door she began pitchin' into you. +`I suppose that's young Dr. Glover,' said she. I told her it was, and +then she went on to say, givin' me no chance to explain nothin', that +she didn't want to have anything to do with you; that she thought it +was a shame to turn people's houses into paupers' hospitals for the +purpose of teachin' medical students; that she had heard of you, and +what she had heard she hadn't liked. All this time she kept goin' +upstairs, and I follerin' her, and the fust thing I knowed she opened a +door and went into a room, and I went in after her, and there, in a +bed, was a patient of some kind. I was took back dreadful, for the +state of the case came to me like a flash. Your uncle had been sent +for, and I was mistook for him. Now, what to say was a puzzle to me, +and I began to think pretty fast. It was an awkward business to have +to explain things to that sharp-set old woman. The fact is, I didn't +know how to begin, and was a good deal afraid, besides, but she didn't +give me no time for considerin'. `I think it's her brain,' said she, +`but perhaps you'll know better. Catherine, uncover your head!' And +with that the patient turned over a little and uncovered her head, +which she had had the sheet over. It was a young woman, and she gave +me a good look, but she didn't say nothin'. Now I WAS in a state of +mind." +</P> + +<P> +"Of course you must have been," I answered. "Why didn't you tell her +that you were not a doctor, but that I was. It would have been easy +enough to explain matters. She might have thought my uncle could not +come and he had sent me, and that you had come along for company. The +patient ought to be attended to without delay." +</P> + +<P> +"She's got to be-attended to," said Uncle Beamish, "or else there will +be a row and we'll have to travel—storm or no storm. But if you had +heard what that old woman said about young doctors, and you in +particular, you would know that you wasn't goin' to have anything to do +with this case—at least, you wouldn't show in it. But I've got no +more time for talkin'. I came down here on business. When the old +lady said, `Catherine, hold out your hand!' and she held it out, I had +nothin' to do but step up and feel her pulse. I know how to do that, +for I have done a lot of nussin' in my life. And then it seemed +nat'ral to ask her to put out her tongue, and when she did it I gave a +look at it and nodded my head. `Do you think it is her brain?' said +the old woman, half whisperin'. `Can't say anything about that yit,' +said I. `I must go down-stairs and get the medicine-case. The fust +thing to do is to give her a draught, and I will bring it up to her as +soon as it is mixed.' You have got a pocket medicine-case with you, +haven't you?" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, yes," said I. "It is in my overcoat." +</P> + +<P> +"I knowed it," said Uncle Beamish. "An old doctor might go visitin' +without his medicine-case, but a young one would be sure to take it +along, no matter where he was goin'. Now you get it, please, quick." +</P> + +<P> +"My notion is," said he, when I returned from the kitchen with the +case, "that you mix somethin' that might soothe her a little, if she +has got anything the matter with her brain, and which won't hurt her if +she hasn't. And then, when I take it up to her, you tell me what +symptoms to look for. I can do it—I have spent nights lookin' for +symptoms. Then, when I come down and report, you might send her up +somethin' that would keep her from gettin' any wuss till the doctor can +come in the mornin', for he ain't comin' here to-night." +</P> + +<P> +"A very good plan," said I. "Now, what can I give her? What is the +patient's age?" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, her age don't matter much," said Uncle Beamish, impatiently. "She +may be twenty, more or less, and any mild stuff will do to begin with." +</P> + +<P> +"I will give her some sweet spirits of nitre," said I, taking out a +little vial. "Will you ask the servant for a glass of water and a +teaspoon?" +</P> + +<P> +"Now," said I, when I had quickly prepared the mixture, "she can have a +teaspoonful of this, and another in ten minutes, and then we will see +whether we will go on with it or not." +</P> + +<P> +"And what am I to look for?" said he. +</P> + +<P> +"In the first place," said I, producing a clinical thermometer, "you +must take her temperature. You know how to do that?" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, yes," said he. "I have done it hundreds of times. She must hold +it in her mouth five minutes." +</P> + +<P> +"Yes, and while you are waiting," I continued, "you must try to find +out, in the first place, if there are, or have been, any signs of +delirium. You might ask the old lady, and besides, you may be able to +judge for yourself." +</P> + +<P> +"I can do that," said he. "I have seen lots of it." +</P> + +<P> +"Then, again," said I, "you must observe whether or not her pupils are +dilated. You might also inquire whether there had been any partial +paralysis or numbness in any part of the body. These things must be +looked for in brain trouble. Then you can come down, ostensibly to +prepare another prescription, and when you have reported, I have no +doubt I can give you something which will modify, or I should say—" +</P> + +<P> +"Hold her where she is till mornin'," said Uncle Beamish. "That's what +you mean. Be quick. Give me that thermometer and the tumbler, and +when I come down again, I reckon you can fit her out with a +prescription just as good as anybody." +</P> + +<P> +He hurried away, and I sat down to consider. I was full of ambition, +full of enthusiasm for the practice of my profession. I would have +been willing to pay largely for the privilege of undertaking an +important case by myself, in which it would depend upon me whether or +not I should call in a consulting brother. So far, in the cases I had +undertaken, a consulting brother had always called himself in—that is, +I had practised in hospitals or with my uncle. Perhaps it might be +found necessary, notwithstanding all that had been said against me, +that I should go up to take charge of this case. I wished I had not +forgotten to ask the old man how he had found the tongue and pulse. +</P> + +<P> +In less than a quarter of an hour Uncle Beamish returned. +</P> + +<P> +"Well," said I, quickly, "what are the symptoms?" +</P> + +<P> +"I'll give them to you," said he, taking his seat. "I'm not in such a +hurry now, because I told the old woman I would like to wait a little +and see how that fust medicine acted. The patient spoke to me this +time. When I took the thermometer out of her mouth she says, `You are +comin' up ag'in, doctor?' speakin' low and quickish, as if she wanted +nobody but me to hear." +</P> + +<P> +"But how about the symptoms?" said I, impatiently. +</P> + +<P> +"Well," he answered, "in the fust place her temperature is ninety-eight +and a half, and that's about nat'ral, I take it." +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," I said, "but you didn't tell me about her tongue and pulse." +</P> + +<P> +"There wasn't nothin' remarkable about them," said he. +</P> + +<P> +"All of which means," I remarked, "that there is no fever. But that is +not at all a necessary accompaniment of brain derangements. How about +the dilatation of her pupils?" +</P> + +<P> +"There isn't none," said Uncle Beamish; "they are ruther squinched up, +if anything. And as to delirium, I couldn't see no signs of it, and +when I asked the old lady about the numbness, she said she didn't +believe there had been any." +</P> + +<P> +"No tendency to shiver, no disposition to stretch?" +</P> + +<P> +"No," said the old man, "no chance for quinine." +</P> + +<P> +"The trouble is," said I, standing before the stove and fixing my mind +upon the case with earnest intensity, "that there are so few symptoms +in brain derangement. If I could only get hold of something tangible—" +</P> + +<P> +"If I was you," interrupted Uncle Beamish, "I wouldn't try to get hold +of nothin'. I would just give her somethin' to keep her where she is +till mornin'. If you can do that, I'll guarantee that any good doctor +can take her up and go on with her to-morrow." +</P> + +<P> +Without noticing the implication contained in these remarks, I +continued my consideration of the case. +</P> + +<P> +"If I could get a drop of her blood," said I. +</P> + +<P> +"No, no!" exclaimed Uncle Beamish, "I'm not goin' to do anything of +that sort. What in the name of common sense would you do with her +blood?" +</P> + +<P> +"I would examine it microscopically," I said. "I might find out all I +want to know." +</P> + +<P> +Uncle Beamish did not sympathize with this method of diagnosis. +</P> + +<P> +"If you did find out there was the wrong kind of germs, you couldn't do +anything with them to-night, and it would just worry you," said the old +man. "I believe that nature will get along fust-rate without any help, +at least till mornin'. But you've got to give her some medicine—not +so much for her good as for our good. If she's not treated we're +bounced. Can't you give her somethin' that would do anybody good, no +matter what's the matter with 'em? If it was the spring of the year I +would say sarsaparilla. If you could mix her up somethin' and put into +it some of them benevolent microbes the doctors talk about, it would be +a good deed to do to anybody." +</P> + +<P> +"The benign bacilli," said I. "Unfortunately I haven't any of them +with me." +</P> + +<P> +"And if you had," he remarked, "I'd be in favor of givin' 'em to the +old woman. I take it they would do, her more good than anybody else. +Come along now, doctor; it is about time for me to go up-stairs and see +how the other stuff acted—not on the patient, I don't mean, but on the +old woman. The fact is, you know, it's her we're dosin'." +</P> + +<P> +"Not at all," said I, speaking a little severely. "I am trying to do +my very best for the patient, but I fear I cannot do it without seeing +her. Don't you think that if you told the old lady how absolutely +necessary—" +</P> + +<P> +"Don't say anything more about that!" exclaimed Uncle Beamish. "I +hoped I wouldn't have to mention it, but she told me ag'in that she +would never have one of those unfledged medical students, just out of +the egg-shell, experimentin' on any of her family, and from what she +said about you in particular, I should say she considered you as a +medical chick without even down on you." +</P> + +<P> +"What can she know of me?" I asked indignantly. +</P> + +<P> +"Give it up," said he. "Can't guess it. But that ain't the p'int. +The p'int is, what are you goin' to give her? When I was young the +doctors used to say, When you are in doubt, give calomel—as if you +were playin' trumps." +</P> + +<P> +"Nonsense, nonsense," said I, my eyes earnestly fixed upon my open +medical case. +</P> + +<P> +"I suppose a mustard-plaster on the back of her neck—" +</P> + +<P> +"Wouldn't do at all," I interrupted. "Wait a minute, now—yes—I know +what I will do: I will give her sodium bromide—ten grains." +</P> + +<P> +"`Which will hit if it's a deer and miss if it's a calf' as the hunter +said?" inquired Uncle Beamish. +</P> + +<P> +"It will certainly not injure her," said I, "and I am quite sure it +will be a positive advantage. If there has been cerebral disturbance, +which has subsided temporarily, it will assist her to tide over the +interim before its recurrence." +</P> + +<P> +"All right," said Uncle Beamish, "give it to me, and I'll be off. It's +time I showed up ag'in." +</P> + +<P> +He did not stay up-stairs very long this time. +</P> + +<P> +"No symptoms yit, but the patient looked at me as if she wanted to say +somethin'; but she didn't git no chance, for the old lady set herself +down as if she was planted in a garden-bed and intended to stay there. +But the patient took the medicine as mild as a lamb." +</P> + +<P> +"That is very good," said I. "It may be that she appreciates the +seriousness of her ewe better than we do." +</P> + +<P> +"I should say she wants to git well," he replied. "She looks like that +sort of a person to me. The old woman said she thought we would have +to stay awhile till the storm slackened, and I said, yes, indeed, and +there wasn't any chance of its slackenin' to-night; besides, I wanted +to see the patient before bedtime." +</P> + +<P> +At this moment the door opened and the servant-woman came in. +</P> + +<P> +"She says you are to have supper, and it will be ready in about half an +hour. One of you had better go out and attend to your horse, for the +man is not coming back to-night." +</P> + +<P> +"I will go to the barn," said I, rising. Uncle Beamish also rose and +said he would go with me. +</P> + +<P> +"I guess you can find some hay and oats," said the woman, as we were +putting on our coats and overshoes in the kitchen, "and here's a +lantern. We don't keep no horse now, but there's feed left." +</P> + +<P> +As we pushed through the deep snow into the barn, Uncle Beamish said: +</P> + +<P> +"I've been tryin' my best to think where we are without askin' any +questions, and I'm dead beat. I don't remember no such house as this +on the road." +</P> + +<P> +"Perhaps we got off the road," said I. +</P> + +<P> +"That may be," said he, as we entered the barn. "It's a straight road +from Warburton to the pike near my sister's house, but there's two +other roads that branch off to the right and strike the pike further +off to the east. Perhaps we got on one of them in all that darkness +and perplexin' whiteness, when it wasn't easy to see whether we were +keepin' a straight road or not." +</P> + +<P> +The horse neighed as we approached with a light. +</P> + +<P> +"I would not be at all surprised," said I, "if this horse had once +belonged here and that was the reason why, as soon as he got a chance, +he turned and made straight for his old home." +</P> + +<P> +"That isn't unlikely," said Uncle Beamish, "and that's the reason we +did not pass Crocker's. But here we are, wherever it is, and here +we've got to stay till mornin'." +</P> + +<P> +We found hay and oats and a pump in the corner of the wagon-house, and +having put the horse in the stall and made him as comfortable as +possible with some old blankets, we returned to the house, bringing our +valises with us. +</P> + +<P> +Our supper was served in the sitting-room because there was a good fire +there, and the servant told us we would have to eat by ourselves, as +"she" was not coming down. +</P> + +<P> +"We'll excuse her," said Uncle Beamish, with an alacrity of expression +that might have caused suspicion. +</P> + +<P> +We had a good supper, and were then shown a room on the first floor on +the other side of the hall, where the servant said we were to sleep. +</P> + +<P> +We sat by the stove awhile, waiting for developments, but as Uncle +Beamish's bedtime was rapidly approaching, he sent word to the +sick-chamber that he was coming up for his final visit. +</P> + +<P> +This time he stayed up-stairs but a few minutes. +</P> + +<P> +"She's fast asleep," said he, "and the old woman says she'll call me if +I'm needed in the night, and you'll have to jump up sharp and overhaul +that medicine-case if that happens." +</P> + +<P> +The next morning, and very early in the morning, I was awaked by Uncle +Beamish, who stood at my side. +</P> + +<P> +"Look here," said he, "I've been outside. It's stopped snowin' and +it's clearin' off. I've been to the barn and I've fed the horse, and I +tell you what I'm in favor of doin'. There's nobody up yit, and I +don't want to stay here and make no explanations to that old woman. I +don't fancy gittin' into rows on Christmas mornin'. We've done all the +good we can here, and the best thing we can do now is to git away +before anybody is up, and leave a note sayin' that we've got to go on +without losin' time, and that we will send another doctor as soon as +possible. My sister's doctor don't live fur away from her, and I know +she will be willin' to send for him. Then our duty will be done, and +what the old woman thinks of us won't make no, difference to nobody." +</P> + +<P> +"That plan suits me," said I, rising. "I don't want to stay here, and +as I am not to be allowed to see the patient, there is no reason why I +should stay. What we have done will more than pay for our supper and +lodgings, so that our consciences are clear." +</P> + +<P> +"But you must write a note," said Uncle Beamish. "Got any paper?" +</P> + +<P> +I tore a leaf from my note-book, and went to the window, where it was +barely light enough for me to see how to write. +</P> + +<P> +"Make it short," said the old man. "I'm awful fidgety to git off." +</P> + +<P> +I made it very short, and then, valises in hand, we quietly took our +way to the kitchen. +</P> + +<P> +"How this floor does creak!" said Uncle Beamish. "Git on your overcoat +and shoes as quick as you can, and we'll leave the note on this table." +</P> + +<P> +I had just shaken myself into my overcoat when Uncle Beamish gave a +subdued exclamation, and quickly turning, I saw entering the kitchen a +female figure in winter wraps and carrying a hand-bag. +</P> + +<P> +"By George!" whispered the old man, "it's the patient!" +</P> + +<P> +The figure advanced directly toward me. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, Dr. Glover!" she whispered, "I am so glad to get down before you +went away!" +</P> + +<P> +I stared in amazement at the speaker, but even in the dim light I +recognized her. This was the human being whose expected presence at +the Collingwood mansion was taking me there to spend Christmas. +</P> + +<P> +"Kitty!" I exclaimed—"Miss Burroughs, I mean,—what is the meaning of +this?" +</P> + +<P> +"Don't ask me for any meanings now," she said. "I want you and your +uncle to take me to the Collingwoods'. I suppose you are on your way +there, for they wrote you were coming. And oh! let us be quick, for +I'm afraid Jane will come down, and she will be sure to wake up aunty. +I saw one of you go out to the barn, and knew you intended to leave, so +I got ready just as fast as I could. But I must leave some word for +aunty." +</P> + +<P> +"I have written a note," said I. "But are you well enough to travel?" +</P> + +<P> +"Just let me add a line to it," said she. "I am as well as I ever was." +</P> + +<P> +I gave her a pencil, and she hurriedly wrote something on the paper +which I had left on the kitchen table. Then, quickly glancing around, +she picked up a large carving-fork, and sticking it through the paper +into the soft wood of the table, she left it standing there. +</P> + +<P> +"Now it won't blow away when we open the door," she whispered. "Come +on." +</P> + +<P> +"You cannot go out to the barn," I said; "we will bring up the sleigh." +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, no, no, no," she answered, "I must not wait here. If I once get +out of the house I shall feel safe. Of course I shall go anyway, but I +don't want any quarrelling on this Christmas morning." +</P> + +<P> +"I'm with you there," said Uncle Beamish, approvingly. "Doctor, we can +take her to the barn without her touching the snow. Let her sit in +this arm-chair, and we can carry her between us. She's no weight." +</P> + +<P> +In half a minute the kitchen door was softly closed behind us, and we +were carrying Miss Burroughs to the barn. My soul was in a wild +tumult. Dozens of questions were on my tongue, but I had no chance to +ask any of them. +</P> + +<P> +Uncle Beamish and I returned to the porch for the valises, and then, +closing the back door, we rapidly began to make preparations for +leaving. +</P> + +<P> +"I suppose," said Uncle Beamish, as we went into the stable, leaving +Miss Burroughs in the wagon-house, "that this business is all right? +You seem to know the young woman, and she is of age to act for herself." +</P> + +<P> +Whatever she wants to do," I answered, "is perfectly right.<BR> +You may trust to that. I do not understand the matter any more than +you do, but I know she is expected at the Collingwoods', and wants to +go there." +</P> + +<P> +"Very good," said Uncle Beamish. "We'll git away fust and ask +explanations afterwards." +</P> + +<P> +"Dr. Glover," said Miss Burroughs, as we led the horse into the +wagon-house, "don't put the bells on him. Stuff them gently under the +seat—as softly as you can. But how are we all to go away? I have +been looking at that sleigh, and it is intended only for two." +</P> + +<P> +"It's rather late to think of that, miss," said Uncle Beamish, "but +there's one thing that's certain. We're both very polite to ladies, +but neither of us is willin' to be left behind on this trip. But it's +a good-sized sleigh, and we'll all pack in, well enough. You and me +can sit on the seat, and the doctor can stand up in front of us and +drive. In old times it was considered the right thing for the driver +of the sleigh to stand up and do his drivin'." +</P> + +<P> +The baggage was carefully stowed away, and, after a look around the +dimly lighted wagon-house, Miss Burroughs and Uncle Beamish got into +the sleigh, and I tucked the big fur robe around them. +</P> + +<P> +"I hate to make a journey before breakfast," said Uncle Beamish, as I +was doing this, "especially on Christmas mornin', but somehow or other +there seems to be somethin' jolly about this business, and we won't +have to wait so long for breakfast, nuther. It can't be far from my +sister's, and we'll all stop there and have breakfast. Then you two +can leave me and go on. She'll be as glad to see any friends of mine +as if they were her own. And she'll be pretty sure, on a mornin' like +this, to have buckwheat cakes and sausages." +</P> + +<P> +Miss Burroughs looked at the old man with a puzzled air, but she asked +him no questions. +</P> + +<P> +"How are you going to keep yourself warm, Dr. Glover?" she said. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, this long ulster will be enough for me," I replied, "and as I +shall stand up, I could not use a robe, if we had another." +</P> + +<P> +In fact, the thought of being with Miss Burroughs and the anticipation +of a sleigh-ride alone with her after we had left Uncle Beamish with +his sister, had put me into such a glow that I scarcely knew it was +cold weather. +</P> + +<P> +"You'd better be keerful, doctor," said Uncle Beamish. "You don't want +to git rheumatism in your j'ints on this Christmas mornin'. Here's +this horse-blanket that we are settin' on. We don't need it, and you'd +better wrap it round you, after you git in, to keep your legs warm." +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, do!" said Miss Burroughs. "It may look funny, but we will not +meet anybody so early as this." +</P> + +<P> +"All right!" said I, "and now we are ready to start." +</P> + +<P> +I slid back the barn door and then led the horse outside. Closing the +door, and making as little noise as possible in doing it, I got into +the sleigh, finding plenty of room to stand up in front of my +companions. Now I wrapped the horse-blanket about the lower part of my +body, and as I had no belt with which to secure it, Miss Burroughs +kindly offered to fasten it round my waist by means of a long pin which +she took from her hat. It is impossible to describe the exhilaration +that pervaded me as she performed this kindly office. After thanking +her warmly, I took the reins and we started. +</P> + +<P> +"It is so lucky," whispered Miss Burroughs, "that I happened to think +about the bells. We don't make any noise at all." +</P> + +<P> +This was true. The slowly uplifted hoofs of the horse descended +quietly into the soft snow, and the sleigh-runners slipped along +without a sound. +</P> + +<P> +"Drive straight for the gate, doctor," whispered Uncle Beamish. "It +don't matter nothin' about goin' over flower-beds and grass-plats in +such weather." +</P> + +<P> +I followed his advice, for no roadway could be seen. But we had gone +but a short distance when the horse suddenly stopped. +</P> + +<P> +"What's the matter?" asked Miss Burroughs, in a low voice. "Is it too +deep for him?" +</P> + +<P> +"We're in a drift," said Uncle Beamish. "But it's not too deep. Make +him go ahead, doctor." +</P> + +<P> +I clicked gently and tapped the horse with the whip, but he did not +move. +</P> + +<P> +"What a dreadful thing," whispered Miss Burroughs, leaning forward, +"for him to stop so near the house! Dr. Glover, what does this mean?" +And, as she spoke, she half rose behind me. "Where did Sir Rohan come +from?" +</P> + +<P> +"Who's he?" asked Uncle Beamish, quickly. +</P> + +<P> +"That horse," she answered. "That's my aunt's horse. She sold him a +few days ago." +</P> + +<P> +"By George!" ejaculated Uncle Beamish, unconsciously raising his voice +a little. "Wilson bought him, and his bringin' us here is as plain as +A B C. And now he don't want to leave home." +</P> + +<P> +"But he has got to do it," said I, jerking the horse's head to one side +and giving him a cut with the whip. +</P> + +<P> +"Don't whip him," whispered Miss Burroughs; "it always makes him more +stubborn. How glad I am I thought of the bells! The only way to get +him to go is to mollify him." +</P> + +<P> +"But how is that to be done?" I asked anxiously. +</P> + +<P> +"You must give him sugar and pat his neck. If I had some sugar and +could get out—" +</P> + +<P> +"But you haven't it, and you can't git out," said Uncle Beamish. "Try +him again doctor!" +</P> + +<P> +I jerked the reins impatiently. "Go along!" said I. But he did not go +along. +</P> + +<P> +"Haven't you got somethin' in your medicine-case you could mollify him +with?" said Uncle Beamish. "Somethin' sweet that he might like?" +</P> + +<P> +For an instant I caught at this absurd suggestion, and my mind ran over +the contents of my little bottles. If I had known his character, some +sodium bromide in his morning feed might, by this time, have mollified +his obstinacy. +</P> + +<P> +"If I could be free of this blanket," said I, fumbling at the pin +behind me, "I would get out and lead him into the road." +</P> + +<P> +"You could not do it," said Miss Burroughs. "You might pull his head +off, but he wouldn't move. I have seen him tried." +</P> + +<P> +At this moment a window-sash in the second story of the house was +raised, and there, not thirty feet from us, stood an elderly female, +wrapped in a gray shawl, with piercing eyes shining through great +spectacles. +</P> + +<P> +"You seem to be stuck," said she, sarcastically. "You are worse stuck +than the fork was in my kitchen table." +</P> + +<P> +We made no answer. I do not know how Miss Burroughs looked or felt, or +what was the appearance of Uncle Beamish, but I know I must have been +very red in the face. I gave the horse a powerful crack and shouted to +him to go on. There was no need for low speaking now. +</P> + +<P> +"You needn't be cruel to dumb animals," said the old lady, "and you +can't budge him. He never did like snow, especially in going away from +home. You cut a powerful queer figure, young man, with that +horse-blanket around you. You don't look much like a practising +physician." +</P> + +<P> +"Miss Burroughs," I exclaimed, "please take that pin out of this +blanket. If I can get at his head I know I can pull him around and +make him go." +</P> + +<P> +But she did not seem to hear me. "Aunty," she cried, "it's a shame to +stand there and make fun of us. We have got a perfect right to go away +if we want to, and we ought not to be laughed at." +</P> + +<P> +The old lady paid no attention to this remark. +</P> + +<P> +"And there's that false doctor," she said. "I wonder how he feels just +now." +</P> + +<P> +"False doctor!" exclaimed Miss Burroughs. "I don't understand." +</P> + +<P> +"Young lady," said Uncle Beamish, "I'm no false doctor. I intended to +tell you all about it as soon as I got a chance, but I haven't had one. +And, old lady, I'd like you to know that I don't say I'm a doctor, but +I do say I'm a nuss, and a good nuss, and you can't deny it." +</P> + +<P> +To this challenge the figure at the window made no answer. +</P> + +<P> +"Catherine," said she, "I can't stand here and take cold, but I just +want to know one thing: Have you positively made up your mind to marry +that young doctor in the horse-blanket?" +</P> + +<P> +This question fell like a bomb-shell into the middle of the stationary +sleigh. +</P> + +<P> +I had never asked Kitty to marry me. I loved her with all my heart and +soul, and I hoped, almost believed, that she loved me. It had been my +intention, when we should be left together in the sleigh this morning, +after dropping Uncle Beamish at his sister's house, to ask her to marry +me. +</P> + +<P> +The old woman's question pierced me as if it had been a flash of +lightning coming through the frosty air of a winter morning. I dropped +the useless reins and turned. Kitty's face was ablaze. She made a +movement as if she was about to jump out of the sleigh and flee. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, Kitty!" said I, bending down toward her, "tell her yes! I beg I +entreat, I implore you to tell her yes! Oh, Kitty! if you don't say +yes I shall never know another happy day." +</P> + +<P> +For one moment Kitty looked up into my face, and then said she: +</P> + +<P> +"It is my positive intention to marry him!" +</P> + +<P> +With the agility of a youth, Uncle Beamish threw the robe from him and +sprang out into the deep snow. Then, turning toward us, he took off +his hat. +</P> + +<P> +"By George!" said he, "you're a pair of trumps. I never did see any +human bein's step up to the mark more prompt. Madam," he cried, +addressing the old lady, "you ought to be the proudest woman in this +county at seein' such a thing as this happen under your window of a +Christmas mornin'. And now the best thing that you can do is to invite +us all in to have breakfast." +</P> + +<P> +"You'll have to come in," said she, "or else stay out there and freeze +to death, for that horse isn't going to take you away. And if my niece +really intends to marry the young man, and has gone so far as to start +to run away with him,—and with a false doctor,—of course I've got no +more to say about it, and you can come in and have breakfast." And +with that she shut down the window. +</P> + +<P> +"That's talkin'," said Uncle Beamish. "Sit still, doctor, and I'll +lead him around to the back door. I guess he'll move quick enough when +you want him to turn back." +</P> + +<P> +Without the slightest objection Sir Rohan permitted himself to be +turned back and led up to the kitchen porch. +</P> + +<P> +"Now you two sparklin' angels get out," said Uncle Beamish, "and go in. +I'll attend to the horse." +</P> + +<P> +Jane, with a broad grin on her face, opened the kitchen door. +</P> + +<P> +"Merry Christmas to you both!" said she. +</P> + +<P> +"Merry Christmas!" we cried, and each of us shook her by the hand. +</P> + +<P> +"Go in the sitting-room and get warm," said Jane. "She'll be down +pretty soon." +</P> + +<P> +I do not know how long we were together in that sitting-room. We had +thousands of things to say, and we said most of them. Among other +things, we managed to get in some explanations of the occurrences of +the previous night. Kitty told her tale briefly. She and her aunt, to +whom she was making a visit, and who wanted her to make her house her +home, had had a quarrel two days before. Kitty was wild to go to the +Collingwoods', and the old lady, who, for some reason, hated the +family, was determined she should not go. But Kitty was immovable, and +never gave up until she found that her aunt had gone so far as to +dispose of her horse, thus making it impossible to travel in such +weather, there being no public conveyances passing the house. Kitty +was an orphan, and had a guardian who would have come to her aid, but +she could not write to him in time, and, in utter despair, she went to +bed. She would not eat or drink, she would not speak, and she covered +up her head. +</P> + +<P> +"After a day and a night," said Kitty, "aunty got dreadfully frightened +and thought something was the matter with my brain. Her family are +awfully anxious about their brains. I knew she had sent for the doctor +and I was glad of it, for I thought he would help me. I must say I was +surprised when I first saw that Mr. Beamish, for I thought he was Dr. +Morris. Now tell me about your coming here." +</P> + +<P> +"And so," she said, when I had finished, "you had no idea that you were +prescribing for me! Please do tell me what were those medicines you +sent up to me and which I took like a truly good girl." +</P> + +<P> +"I didn't know it at the time," said I, "but I sent you sixty drops of +the deepest, strongest love in a glass of water, and ten grains of +perfect adoration." +</P> + +<P> +"Nonsense!" said Kitty, with a blush, and at that moment Uncle Beamish +knocked at the door. +</P> + +<P> +"I thought I'd just step in and tell you," said he, "that breakfast +will be comin' along in a minute. I found they were goin' to have +buckwheat cakes, anyway, and I prevailed on Jane to put sausages in the +bill of fare. Merry Christmas to you both! I would like to say more, +but here comes the old lady and Jane." +</P> + +<P> +The breakfast was a strange meal, but a very happy one. The old lady +was very dignified. She made no allusion to Christmas or to what had +happened, but talked to Uncle Beamish about people in Warburton. +</P> + +<P> +I have a practical mind, and, in spite of the present joy, I could not +help feeling a little anxiety about what was to be done when breakfast +was over. But just as we were about to rise from the table we were all +startled by a great jingle of sleigh-bells outside. The old lady arose +and stopped to the window. +</P> + +<P> +"There!" said she, turning toward us. "Here's a pretty kettle of fish! +There's a two-horse sleigh outside, with a man driving, and a gentleman +in the back seat who I am sure is Dr. Morris, and he has come all the +way on this bitter cold morning to see the patient I sent for him to +come to. Now, who is going to tell him he has come on a fool's errand?" +</P> + +<P> +"Fool's errand!" I cried. "Every one of you wait in here and I'll go +out and tell him." +</P> + +<P> +When I dashed out of doors and stood by the side of my uncle's sleigh, +he was truly an amazed man. +</P> + +<P> +"I will get in, uncle," said I, "and if you will let John drive the +horses slowly around the yard, I will tell you how I happen to be here." +</P> + +<P> +The story was a much longer one than I expected it to be, and John must +have driven those horses backward and forward for half an hour. +</P> + +<P> +"Well," said my uncle, at last, "I never saw your Kitty, but I knew her +father and her mother, and I will go in and take a look at her. If I +like her, I will take you all on to the Collingwoods', and drop Uncle +Beamish at his sister's house." +</P> + +<P> +"I'll tell you what it is, young doctor," said Uncle Beamish, at +parting, "you ought to buy that big roan horse. He has been a regular +guardian angel to us this Christmas." +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, that would never do at all," cried Kitty. "His patients would all +die before he got there." +</P> + +<P> +"That is, if they had anything the matter with them," added my uncle. +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<A NAME="chap07"></A> +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +A PIECE OF RED CALICO +</H3> + +<P> +Before beginning the relation of the following incidents, I wish to +state that I am a young married man, doing business in a large city, in +the suburbs of which I live. +</P> + +<P> +I was going into town the other morning, when my wife handed me a +little piece of red calico, and asked me if I would have time, during +the day, to buy her two yards and a half of calico like it. I assured +her that it would be no trouble at all, and putting the piece of calico +in my pocket, I took the train for the city. +</P> + +<P> +At lunch-time I stopped in at a large dry-goods store to attend to my +wife's commission. I saw a well-dressed man walking the floor between +the counters, where long lines of girls were waiting on much longer +lines of customers, and asked him where I could see some red calico. +</P> + +<P> +"This way, sir," and he led me up the store. "Miss Stone," said he to +a young lady, "show this gentleman some red calico." +</P> + +<P> +"What shade do you want!" asked Miss Stone. +</P> + +<P> +I showed her the little piece of calico that my wife had given me. She +looked at it and handed it back to me. Then she took down a great roll +of red calico and spread it out on the counter. +</P> + +<P> +"Why, that isn't the shade!" said I. +</P> + +<P> +"No, not exactly," said she. "But it is prettier than your sample." +</P> + +<P> +"That may be," said I. "But, you see, I want to match this piece. +There is something already in my house, made of this kind of calico, +which needs to be made larger, or mended, or something. I want some +calico of the same shade." +</P> + +<P> +The girl made no answer, but took down another roll. +</P> + +<P> +"That's the shade," said she. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," I replied, "but it's striped." +</P> + +<P> +"Stripes are more worn than anything else in calicoes," said she. +</P> + +<P> +Yes. But this isn't to be worn. It's for furniture, I<BR> +think. At any rate, I want perfectly plain stuff, to match something +already in use." +</P> + +<P> +"Well, I don't think you can find it perfectly plain, unless you get +Turkey red." +</P> + +<P> +"What is Turkey red?" I asked. +</P> + +<P> +"Turkey red is perfectly plain in calicoes," she answered. +</P> + +<P> +"Well, let me see some." +</P> + +<P> +"We haven't any Turkey red calico left," she said, "but we have some +very nice plain calicoes in other colors." +</P> + +<P> +"I don't want any other color. I want stuff to match this." +</P> + +<P> +"It's hard to match cheap calico like that," she said, and so I left +her. +</P> + +<P> +I next went into a store a few doors farther up Broadway. When I +entered I approached the "floorwalker," and handing him my sample, said: +</P> + +<P> +"Have you any calico like this?" +</P> + +<P> +"Yes, sir," said he. "Third counter to the right." I went to the +third counter to the right, and showed my sample to the salesman in +attendance there. He looked at it on both sides. Then he said: +</P> + +<P> +"We haven't any of this." +</P> + +<P> +"The floorwalker said you had," said I. +</P> + +<P> +"We had it, but we're out of it now. You'll get that goods at an +upholsterers." +</P> + +<P> +I went across the street to an upholsterer's. +</P> + +<P> +"Have you any stuff like this?" I asked. +</P> + +<P> +"No," said the salesman, "we haven't. Is it for furniture?" +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," I replied. +</P> + +<P> +"Then Turkey red is what you want." +</P> + +<P> +"Is Turkey red just like this?" I asked. +</P> + +<P> +"No," said he, "but it's much better." +</P> + +<P> +"That makes no difference to me," I replied. "I want something just +like this." +</P> + +<P> +"But they don't use that for furniture," he said. +</P> + +<P> +"I should think people could use anything they wanted for furniture," I +remarked, somewhat sharply. +</P> + +<P> +"They can, but they don't," he said quite calmly. "They don't use red +like that. They use Turkey red." +</P> + +<P> +I said no more, but left. The next place I visited was a very large +dry-goods store. Of the first salesman I saw I inquired if they kept +red calico like my sample. +</P> + +<P> +"You'll find that on the second story," said he. +</P> + +<P> +I went up-stairs. There I asked a man: +</P> + +<P> +"Where shall I find red calico?" +</P> + +<P> +"In the far room to the left," and he pointed to a distant corner. +</P> + +<P> +I walked through the crowds of purchasers and salespeople, around the +counters and tables filled with goods, to the far room to the left. +When I got there I asked for red calico. +</P> + +<P> +"The second counter down this side," said the man. I went there and +produced my sample. "Calicoes down-stairs," said the man. +</P> + +<P> +"They told me they were up here," I said. +</P> + +<P> +"Not these plain goods. You'll find them downstairs at the back of the +store, over on that side." +</P> + +<P> +I went down-stairs to the back of the store. +</P> + +<P> +"Where can I find red calico like this?" I asked. +</P> + +<P> +"Next counter but one," said the man addressed, walking with me in the +direction pointed out. "Dunn, show red calicoes." +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Dunn took my sample and looked at it. "We haven't this shade in +that quality of goods," he said. +</P> + +<P> +"Well, have you it in any quality of goods?" I asked. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes. We've got it finer." He took down a piece of calico, and +unrolled a yard or two of it. +</P> + +<P> +"That's not this shade," I said. +</P> + +<P> +"No," said he. "The goods is finer and the color's better." +</P> + +<P> +"I want it to match this," I said. +</P> + +<P> +"I thought you weren't particular about the match," said the salesman. +"You said you didn't care for the quality of the goods, and you know +you can't match without you take into consideration quality and color +both. If you want that quality of goods in red, you ought to get +Turkey red." +</P> + +<P> +I did not think it necessary to answer this remark, but said: +</P> + +<P> +"Then you've got nothing to match this?" +</P> + +<P> +"No, sir. But perhaps they may have it in the upholstery department, +in the sixth story." +</P> + +<P> +I got into the elevator and went up to the top of the house. +</P> + +<P> +"Have you any red stuff like this?" I said to a young man. +</P> + +<P> +"Red stuff? Upholstery department—other end of this floor." +</P> + +<P> +I went to the other end of the floor. +</P> + +<P> +"I want some red calico," I said to a man. +</P> + +<P> +"Furniture goods?" he asked. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," said I. +</P> + +<P> +"Fourth counter to the left." +</P> + +<P> +I went to the fourth counter to the left, and showed my sample to a +salesman. He looked at it, and said: "You'll get this down on the +first floor—calico department." +</P> + +<P> +I turned on my heel, descended in the elevator, and went out on +Broadway. I was thoroughly sick of red calico. But I determined to +make one more trial. My wife had bought her red calico not long +before, and there must be some to be had somewhere. I ought to have +asked her where she bought it, but I thought a simple little thing like +that could be procured anywhere. +</P> + +<P> +I went into another large dry-goods store. As I entered the door a +sudden tremor seized me. I could not bear to take out that piece of +red calico. If I had had any other kind of a rag about me—a pen-wiper +or anything of the sort—I think I would have asked them if they could +match that. +</P> + +<P> +But I stepped up to a young woman and presented my sample, with the +usual question. +</P> + +<P> +"Back room, counter on the left," she said. +</P> + +<P> +I went there. +</P> + +<P> +"Have you any red calico like this?" I asked of the lady behind the +counter. +</P> + +<P> +"No, sir," she said, "but we have it in Turkey red." +</P> + +<P> +Turkey red again! I surrendered. +</P> + +<P> +"All right," I said. "Give me Turkey red." +</P> + +<P> +"How much, sir?" she asked. +</P> + +<P> +"I don't know—say five yards." +</P> + +<P> +The lady looked at me rather strangely, but measured off five yards of +Turkey red calico. Then she rapped on the counter and called out, +"Cash!" A little girl, with yellow hair in two long plaits, came +slowly up. The lady wrote the number of yards; the name of the goods; +her own number; the price; the amount of the bank-note I handed her; +and some other matters—probably the color of my eyes and the direction +and velocity of the wind—on a slip of paper. She then copied all this +in a little book which she kept by her. Then she handed the slip of +paper, the money, and the Turkey red to the yellow-haired girl. This +young girl copied the slip in a little book she carried, and then she +went away with the calico, the paper slip, and the money. +</P> + +<P> +After a very long time—during which the little girl probably took the +goods, the money, and the slip to some central desk, where the note was +received, its amount and number entered in a book; change given to the +girl; a copy of the slip made and entered; girl's entry examined and +approved; goods wrapped up; girl registered; plaits counted and entered +on a slip of paper and copied by the girl in her book; girl taken to a +hydrant and washed; number of towel entered on a paper slip and copied +by the girl in her book; value of my note and amount of change branded +somewhere on the child, and said process noted on a slip of paper and +copied in her book—the girl came to me, bringing my change and the +package of Turkey red calico. +</P> + +<P> +I had time for but very little work at the office that afternoon, and +when I reached home I handed the package of calico to my wife. She +unrolled it and exclaimed: +</P> + +<P> +"Why, this doesn't match the piece I gave you!" +</P> + +<P> +"Match it!" I cried. "Oh no! it doesn't match it. You didn't want +that matched. You were mistaken. What you wanted was Turkey +red—third counter to the left. I mean, Turkey red is what they use!" +</P> + +<P> +My wife looked at me in amazement, and then I detailed to her my +troubles. +</P> + +<P> +"Well," said she, "this Turkey red is a great deal prettier than what I +had, and you've bought so much of it that I needn't use the other at +all. I wish I had thought of Turkey red before." +</P> + +<P> +"I wish from my heart you had!" said I. +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<A NAME="chap08"></A> +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +THE CHRISTMAS WRECK +</H3> + +<P> +"Well, sir," said old Silas, as he gave a preliminary puff to the pipe +he had just lighted, and so satisfied himself that the draught was all +right, "the wind's a-comin', an' so's Christmas. But it's no use bein' +in a hurry fur either of 'em, fur sometimes they come afore you want +'em, anyway." +</P> + +<P> +Silas was sitting in the stern of a small sailing-boat which he owned, +and in which he sometimes took the Sandport visitors out for a sail, +and at other times applied to its more legitimate but less profitable +use, that of fishing. That afternoon he had taken young Mr. Nugent for +a brief excursion on that portion of the Atlantic Ocean which sends its +breakers up on the beach of Sandport. But he had found it difficult, +nay, impossible, just now, to bring him back, for the wind had +gradually died away until there was not a breath of it left. Mr. +Nugent, to whom nautical experiences were as new as the very nautical +suit of blue flannel which he wore, rather liked the calm. It was such +a relief to the monotony of rolling waves. He took out a cigar and +lighted it, and then he remarked: +</P> + +<P> +"I can easily imagine how a wind might come before you sailors might +want it, but I don't see how Christmas could come too soon." +</P> + +<P> +"It come wunst on me when things couldn't `a' looked more onready fur +it," said Silas. +</P> + +<P> +"How was that?" asked Mr. Nugent, settling himself a little more +comfortably on the hard thwart. "If it's a story, let's have it. This +is a good time to spin a yarn." +</P> + +<P> +"Very well," said old Silas. "I'll spin her." +</P> + +<P> +The bare-legged boy whose duty it was to stay forward and mind the jib +came aft as soon as he smelt a story, and took a nautical position, +which was duly studied by Mr. Nugent, on a bag of ballast in the bottom +of the boat. +</P> + +<P> +"It's nigh on to fifteen year ago," said Silas, "that I was on the bark +Mary Auguster, bound for Sydney, New South Wales, with a cargo of +canned goods. We was somewhere about longitood a hundred an' seventy, +latitood nothin', an' it was the twenty-second o' December, when we was +ketched by a reg'lar typhoon which blew straight along, end on, fur a +day an' a half. It blew away the storm-sails. It blew away every +yard, spar, shroud, an' every strand o' riggin', an' snapped the masts +off close to the deck. It blew away all the boats. It blew away the +cook's caboose, an' everythin' else on deck. It blew off the hatches, +an' sent 'em spinnin' in the air about a mile to leeward. An' afore it +got through, it washed away the cap'n an' all the crew 'cept me an' two +others. These was Tom Simmons, the second mate, an' Andy Boyle, a chap +from the Adirondack Mount'ins, who'd never been to sea afore. As he +was a landsman, he ought, by rights, to 'a' been swep' off by the wind +an' water, consid'rin' that the cap'n an' sixteen good seamen had gone +a'ready. But he had hands eleven inches long, an' that give him a grip +which no typhoon could git the better of. Andy had let out that his +father was a miller up there in York State, an' a story had got round +among the crew that his granfather an' great-gran'father was millers, +too; an' the way the fam'ly got such big hands come from their habit of +scoopin' up a extry quart or two of meal or flour fur themselves when +they was levellin' off their customers' measures. He was a +good-natered feller, though, an' never got riled when I'd tell him to +clap his flour-scoops onter a halyard. +</P> + +<P> +"We was all soaked, an' washed, an' beat, an' battered. We held on +some way or other till the wind blowed itself out, an' then we got on +our legs an' began to look about us to see how things stood. The sea +had washed into the open hatches till the vessel was more'n half full +of water, an' that had sunk her, so deep that she must 'a' looked like +a canal-boat loaded with gravel. We hadn't had a thing to eat or drink +durin' that whole blow, an' we was pretty ravenous. We found a keg of +water which was all right, and a box of biscuit which was what you +might call softtack, fur they was soaked through an' through with +sea-water. We eat a lot of them so, fur we couldn't wait, an' the rest +we spread on the deck to dry, fur the sun was now shinin' hot enough to +bake bread. We couldn't go below much, fur there was a pretty good +swell on the sea, an' things was floatin' about so's to make it +dangerous. But we fished out a piece of canvas, which we rigged up +ag'in' the stump of the mainmast so that we could have somethin' that +we could sit down an' grumble under. What struck us all the hardest +was that the bark was loaded with a whole cargo of jolly things to eat, +which was just as good as ever they was, fur the water couldn't git +through the tin cans in which they was all put up, an' here we was with +nothin' to live on but them salted biscuit. There wasn't no way of +gittin' at any of the ship's stores, or any of the fancy prog, fur +everythin' was stowed away tight under six or seven feet of water, an' +pretty nigh all the room that was left between decks was filled up with +extry spars, lumber, boxes, an' other floatin' stuff. All was +shiftin', an' bumpin', an' bangin' every time the vessel rolled. +</P> + +<P> +"As I said afore, Tom was second mate, an' I was bo's'n. Says I to +Tom, `The thing we've got to do is to put up some kind of a spar with a +rag on it fur a distress flag, so that we'll lose no time bein' took +off.' `There's no use a-slavin' at anythin' like that,' says Tom, `fur +we've been blowed off the track of traders, an' the more we work the +hungrier we'll git, an' the sooner will them biscuit be gone.' +</P> + +<P> +"Now when I heared Tom say this I sot still an' began to consider. +Bein' second mate, Tom was, by rights, in command of this craft. But +it was easy enough to see that if he commanded there'd never be nothin' +fur Andy an' me to do. All the grit he had in him he'd used up in +holdin' on durin' that typhoon. What he wanted to do now was to make +himself comfortable till the time come for him to go to Davy Jones's +locker—an' thinkin', most likely, that Davy couldn't make it any +hotter fur him than it was on that deck, still in latitood nothin' at +all, fur we'd been blowed along the line pretty nigh due west. So I +calls to Andy, who was busy turnin' over the biscuits on the deck. +`Andy,' says I, when he had got under the canvas, `we's goin' to have a +'lection fur skipper. Tom, here, is about played out. He's one +candydate, an' I'm another. Now, who do you vote fur? An' mind yer +eye, youngster, that you don't make no mistake.' `I vote fur you' says +Andy. `Carried unanermous!' says I. `An' I want you to take notice +that I'm cap'n of what's left of the Mary Auguster, an' you two has got +to keep your minds on that, an' obey orders.' If Davy Jones was to do +all that Tom Simmons said when he heared this, the old chap would be +kept busier than he ever was yit. But I let him growl his growl out, +knowin' he'd come round all right, fur there wasn't no help fur it, +consid'rin' Andy an' me was two to his one. Pretty soon we all went to +work, an' got up a spar from below, which we rigged to the stump of the +foremast, with Andy's shirt atop of it. +</P> + +<P> +"Them sea-soaked, sun-dried biscuit was pretty mean prog, as you might +think, but we eat so many of 'em that afternoon, an' 'cordingly drank +so much water, that I was obliged to put us all on short rations the +next day. `This is the day afore Christmas,' says Andy Boyle, `an' +to-night will be Christmas eve, an' it's pretty tough fur us to be +sittin' here with not even so much hardtack as we want, an' all the +time thinkin' that the hold of this ship is packed full of the gayest +kind of good things to eat.' `Shut up about Christmas!' says Tom +Simmons. `Them two youngsters of mine, up in Bangor, is havin' their +toes and noses pretty nigh froze, I 'spect, but they'll hang up their +stockin's all the same to-night, never thinkin' that their dad's bein' +cooked alive on a empty stomach.' `Of course they wouldn't hang 'em +up,' says I, if they knowed what a fix you was in, but they don't know +it, an' what's the use of grumblin' at 'em fur bein' a little jolly?' +`Well,' says Andy `they couldn't be more jollier than I'd be if I could +git at some of them fancy fixin's down in the hold. I worked well on +to a week at 'Frisco puttin' in them boxes, an' the names of the things +was on the outside of most of 'em; an' I tell you what it is, mates, it +made my mouth water, even then, to read 'em, an' I wasn't hungry, +nuther, havin' plenty to eat three times a day. There was roast beef, +an' roast mutton, an' duck, an' chicken, an' soup, an' peas, an' beans, +an' termaters, an' plum-puddin', an' mince-pie—' `Shut up with your +mince-pie!' sung out Tom Simmons. `Isn't it enough to have to gnaw on +these salt chips, without hearin' about mince-pie?' `An' more'n that' +says Andy, `there was canned peaches, an' pears, an' plums, an' +cherries.' +</P> + +<P> +"Now these things did sound so cool an' good to me on that br'ilin' +deck that I couldn't stand it, an' I leans over to Andy, an' I says: +`Now look-a here; if you don't shut up talkin' about them things what's +stowed below, an' what we can't git at nohow, overboard you go!' `That +would make you short-handed,' says Andy, with a grin. `Which is more'n +you could say,' says I, `if you'd chuck Tom an' me over'—alludin' to +his eleven-inch grip. Andy didn't say no more then, but after a while +he comes to me, as I was lookin' round to see if anything was in sight, +an' says he, `I spose you ain't got nothin' to say ag'in' my divin' +into the hold just aft of the foremast, where there seems to be a bit +of pretty clear water, an' see if I can't git up somethin'?' `You kin +do it, if you like,' says I, `but it's at your own risk. You can't +take out no insurance at this office.' `All right, then,' says Andy; +`an' if I git stove in by floatin' boxes, you an' Tom'll have to eat +the rest of them salt crackers.' `Now, boy,' says I,—an' he wasn't +much more, bein' only nineteen year old,—`you'd better keep out o' +that hold. You'll just git yourself smashed. An' as to movin' any of +them there heavy boxes, which must be swelled up as tight as if they +was part of the ship, you might as well try to pull out one of the Mary +Auguster's ribs.' `I'll try it,' says Andy, `fur to-morrer is +Christmas, an' if I kin help it I ain't goin' to be floatin' atop of a +Christmas dinner without eatin' any on it.' I let him go, fur he was a +good swimmer an' diver, an' I did hope he might root out somethin' or +other, fur Christmas is about the worst day in the year fur men to be +starvin' on, an' that's what we was a-comin' to. +</P> + +<P> +"Well, fur about two hours Andy swum, an' dove, an' come up blubberin', +an' dodged all sorts of floatin' an' pitchin' stuff, fur the swell was +still on. But he couldn't even be so much as sartin that he'd found +the canned vittles. To dive down through hatchways, an' among broken +bulkheads, to hunt fur any partiklar kind o' boxes under seven foot of +sea-water, ain't no easy job. An' though Andy said he got hold of the +end of a box that felt to him like the big uns he'd noticed as havin' +the meat-pies in, he couldn't move it no more'n if it had been the +stump of the foremast. If we could have pumped the water out of the +hold we could have got at any part of the cargo we wanted, but as it +was, we couldn't even reach the ship's stores, which, of course, must +have been mostly sp'iled anyway, whereas the canned vittles was just as +good as new. The pumps was all smashed or stopped up, for we tried +'em, but if they hadn't 'a' been we three couldn't never have pumped +out that ship on three biscuit a day, an' only about two days' rations +at that. +</P> + +<P> +"So Andy he come up, so fagged out that it was as much as he could do +to get his clothes on, though they wasn't much, an' then he stretched +himself out under the canvas an' went to sleep, an' it wasn't long +afore he was talkin' about roast turkey an' cranberry sass, an' +punkin-pie, an' sech stuff, most of which we knowed was under our feet +that present minnit. Tom Simmons he just b'iled over, an' sung out: +`Roll him out in the sun an' let him cook! I can't stand no more of +this!' But I wasn't goin' to have Andy treated no sech way as that, +fur if it hadn't been fur Tom Simmons' wife an' young uns, Andy'd been +worth two of him to anybody who was consid'rin' savin' life. But I +give the boy a good punch in the ribs to stop his dreamin', fur I was +as hungry as Tom was, an' couldn't stand no nonsense about Christmas +dinners. +</P> + +<P> +"It was a little arter noon when Andy woke up, an' he went outside to +stretch himself. In about a minute he give a yell that made Tom an' me +jump. `A sail!' he hollered. `A sail!' An' you may bet your life, +young man, that 'twasn't more'n half a second afore us two had scuffled +out from under that canvas, an' was standin' by Andy. `There she is!' +he shouted, `not a mile to win'ard.' I give one look, an' then I sings +out: `'Tain't a sail! It's a flag of distress! Can't you see, you +land-lubber, that that's the Stars and Stripes upside down?' `Why, so +it is,' says Andy, with a couple of reefs in the joyfulness of his +voice. An' Tom he began to growl as if somebody had cheated him out of +half a year's wages. +</P> + +<P> +"The flag that we saw was on the hull of a steamer that had been +driftin' down on us while we was sittin' under our canvas. It was +plain to see she'd been caught in the typhoon, too, fur there wasn't a +mast or a smoke-stack on her. But her hull was high enough out of the +water to catch what wind there was, while we was so low sunk that we +didn't make no way at all. There was people aboard, and they saw us, +an' waved their hats an' arms, an' Andy an' me waved ours; but all we +could do was to wait till they drifted nearer, fur we hadn't no boats +to go to 'em if we'd wanted to. +</P> + +<P> +"`I'd like to know what good that old hulk is to us,' says Tom Simmons. +`She can't take us off.' It did look to me somethin' like the blind +leadin' the blind. But Andy he sings out: `We'd be better off aboard +of her, fur she ain't water-logged, an', more'n that, I don't s'pose +her stores are all soaked up in salt water.' There was some sense in +that, an' when the steamer had got to within half a mile of us, we was +glad to see a boat put out from her with three men in it. It was a +queer boat, very low an' flat, an' not like any ship's boat I ever see. +But the two fellers at the oars pulled stiddy, an' pretty soon the boat +was 'longside of us, an' the three men on our deck. One of 'em was the +first mate of the other wreck, an' when he found out what was the +matter with us, he spun his yarn, which was a longer one than ours. +His vessel was the Water Crescent, nine hundred tons, from 'Frisco to +Melbourne, an' they had sailed about six weeks afore we did. They was +about two weeks out when some of their machinery broke down, an' when +they got it patched up it broke ag'in, worse than afore, so that they +couldn't do nothin' with it. They kep' along under sail for about a +month, makin' mighty poor headway till the typhoon struck 'em, an' that +cleaned their decks off about as slick as it did ours, but their +hatches wasn't blowed off, an' they didn't ship no water wuth +mentionin', an' the crew havin' kep' below, none of 'em was lost. But +now they was clean out of provisions an' water, havin' been short when +the breakdown happened, fur they had sold all the stores they could +spare to a French brig in distress that they overhauled when about a +week out. When they sighted us they felt pretty sure they'd git some +provisions out of us. But when I told the mate what a fix we was in +his jaw dropped till his face was as long as one of Andy's hands. +Howsomdever, he said he'd send the boat back fur as many men as it +could bring over, an' see if they couldn't git up some of our stores. +Even if they was soaked with salt water, they'd be better than nothin'. +Part of the cargo of the Water Crescent was tools an' things fur some +railway contractors out in Australier, an' the mate told the men to +bring over some of them irons that might be used to fish out the +stores. All their ship's boats had been blowed away, an' the one they +had was a kind of shore boat for fresh water, that had been shipped as +part of the cargo, an' stowed below. It couldn't stand no kind of a +sea, but there wasn't nothin' but a swell on, an' when it come back it +had the cap'n in it, an' five men, besides a lot of chains an' tools. +</P> + +<P> +"Them fellers an' us worked pretty nigh the rest of the day, an' we got +out a couple of bar'ls of water, which was all right, havin' been tight +bunged, an' a lot of sea-biscuit, all soaked an sloppy, but we only got +a half-bar'l of meat, though three or four of the men stripped an' dove +fur more'n an hour. We cut up some of the meat an' eat it raw, an' the +cap'n sent some over to the other wreck, which had drifted past us to +leeward, an' would have gone clean away from us if the cap'n hadn't had +a line got out an' made us fast to it while we was a-workin' at the +stores. +</P> + +<P> +"That night the cap'n took us three, as well as the provisions we'd got +out, on board his hull, where the 'commodations was consid'able better +than they was on the half-sunk Mary Auguster. An' afore we turned in +he took me aft an' had a talk with me as commandin' off'cer of my +vessel. `That wreck o' yourn,' says he, `has got a vallyble cargo in +it, which isn't sp'iled by bein' under water. Now, if you could get +that cargo into port it would put a lot of money in your pocket, fur +the owners couldn't git out of payin' you fur takin' charge of it an' +havin' it brung in. Now I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll lie by you, +an' I've got carpenters aboard that'll put your pumps in order, an' +I'll set my men to work to pump out your vessel. An' then, when she's +afloat all right, I'll go to work ag'in at my vessel—which I didn't +s'pose there was any use o' doin', but whilst I was huntin' round +amongst our cargo to-day I found that some of the machinery we carried +might be worked up so's to take the place of what is broke in our +engine. We've got a forge aboard, an' I believe we can make these +pieces of machinery fit, an' git goin' ag'in. Then I'll tow you into +Sydney, an' we'll divide the salvage money. I won't git nothin' fur +savin' my vessel, coz that's my business, but you wasn't cap'n o' +yourn, an' took charge of her a-purpose to save her, which is another +thing.' +</P> + +<P> +"I wasn't at all sure that I didn't take charge of the Mary Auguster to +save myself an' not the vessel, but I didn't mention that, an' asked +the cap'n how he expected to live all this time. +</P> + +<P> +"`Oh, we kin git at your stores easy enough,' says he, when the water's +pumped out.' `They'll be mostly sp'iled,' says I. `That don't matter' +says he. `Men'll eat anything when they can't git nothin' else.' An' +with that he left me to think it over. +</P> + +<P> +"I must say, young man, an' you kin b'lieve me if you know anything +about sech things, that the idee of a pile of money was mighty temptin' +to a feller like me, who had a girl at home ready to marry him, and who +would like nothin' better'n to have a little house of his own, an' a +little vessel of his own, an' give up the other side of the world +altogether. But while I was goin' over all this in my mind, an' +wonderin' if the cap'n ever could git us into port, along comes Andy +Boyle, an' sits down beside me. `It drives me pretty nigh crazy,' says +he, `to think that to-morrer's Christmas, an' we've got to feed on that +sloppy stuff we fished out of our stores, an' not much of it, nuther, +while there's all that roast turkey an' plum-puddin' an' mince-pie +a-floatin' out there just afore our eyes, an' we can't have none of +it.' `You hadn't oughter think so much about eatin', Andy,' says +I,`but if I was talkin' about them things I wouldn't leave out canned +peaches. By George! On a hot Christmas like this is goin' to be, I'd +be the jolliest Jack on the ocean if I could git at that canned fruit.' +`Well, there's a way,' says Andy, `that we might git some of 'em. A +part of the cargo of this ship is stuff far blastin' rocks—ca'tridges, +'lectric bat'ries, an' that sort of thing; an' there's a man aboard +who's goin' out to take charge of 'em. I've been talkin' to this +bat'ry man, an' I've made up my mind it'll be easy enough to lower a +little ca'tridge down among our cargo an' blow out a part of it.' `What +'u'd be the good of it,' says I, `blowed into chips?' `It might smash +some,' says he, `but others would be only loosened, an' they'd float up +to the top, where we could git 'em, specially them as was packed with +pies, which must be pretty light.' `Git out, Andy,' says I, `with all +that stuff!' An' he got out. +</P> + +<P> +"But the idees he'd put into my head didn't git out, an' as I laid on +my back on the deck, lookin' up at the stars, they sometimes seemed to +put themselves into the shape of a little house, with a little woman +cookin' at the kitchin fire, an' a little schooner layin' at anchor +just off shore. An' then ag'in they'd hump themselves up till they +looked like a lot of new tin cans with their tops off, an' all kinds of +good things to eat inside, specially canned peaches—the big white +kind, soft an' cool, each one split in half, with a holler in the +middle filled with juice. By George, sir! the very thought of a tin +can like that made me beat my heels ag'in the deck. I'd been mighty +hungry, an' had eat a lot of salt pork, wet an' raw, an' now the very +idee of it, even cooked, turned my stomach. I looked up to the stars +ag'in, an' the little house an' the little schooner was clean gone, an' +the whole sky was filled with nothin' but bright new tin cans. +</P> + +<P> +"In the mornin' Andy he come to me ag'in. `Have you made up your +mind,' says he, `about gittin' some of them good things fur Christmas +dinner?' `Confound you!' says I, `you talk as if all we had to do was +to go an' git 'em.' `An' that's what I b'lieve we kin do,' says he, +`with the help of that bat'ry man.' `Yes,' says I, `an' blow a lot of +the cargo into flinders, an' damage the Mary Auguster so's she couldn't +never be took into port.' An' then I told him what the cap'n had said +to me, an' what I was goin' to do with the money. `A little +ca'tridge,' says Andy, `would do all we want, an' wouldn't hurt the +vessel, nuther. Besides that, I don't b'lieve what this cap'n says +about tinkerin' up his engine. 'Tain't likely he'll ever git her +runnin' ag'in, nor pump out the Mary Auguster, nuther. If I was you +I'd a durned sight ruther have a Christmas dinner in hand than a house +an' wife in the bush.' `I ain't thinkin' o' marryin' a girl in +Australier,' says I. An' Andy he grinned, an' said I wouldn't marry +nobody if I had to live on sp'iled vittles till I got her. +</P> + +<P> +"A little arter that I went to the cap'n an' I told him about Andy's +idee, but he was down on it. `It's your vessel, an' not mine,' says +he, `an' if you want to try to git a dinner out of her I'll not stand +in your way. But it's my 'pinion you'll just damage the ship, an' do +nothin'.' Howsomdever, I talked to the bat'ry man about it, an' he +thought it could be done, an' not hurt the ship, nuther. The men was +all in favor of it, fur none of 'em had forgot it was Christmas day. +But Tom Simmons he was ag'in' it strong, fur he was thinkin' he'd git +some of the money if we got the Mary Auguster into port. He was a +selfish-minded man, was Tom, but it was his nater, an' I s'pose he +couldn't help it. +</P> + +<P> +"Well, it wasn't long afore I began to feel pretty empty an' mean, an' +if I'd wanted any of the prog we got out the day afore, I couldn't have +found much, fur the men had eat it up nearly all in the night. An' so +I just made up my mind without any more foolin', an' me an' Andy Boyle +an' the bat'ry man, with some ca'tridges an' a coil of wire, got into +the little shore boat, an' pulled over to the Mary Auguster. There we +lowered a small ca'tridge down the main hatchway, an' let it rest down +among the cargo. Then we rowed back to the steamer, uncoilin' the wire +as we went. The bat'ry man clumb up on deck, an' fixed his wire to a +'lectric machine, which he'd got all ready afore we started. Andy an' +me didn't git out of the boat. We had too much sense fur that, with +all them hungry fellers waitin' to jump in her. But we just pushed a +little off, an' sot waitin', with our mouths awaterin', fur him to +touch her off. He seemed to be a long time about it, but at last he +did it, an' that instant there was a bang on board the Mary Auguster +that made my heart jump. Andy an' me pulled fur her like mad, the +others a-hollerin' arter us, an' we was on deck in no time. The deck +was all covered with the water that had been throwed up. But I tell +you, sir, that we poked an' fished about, an' Andy stripped an' went +down an' swum all round, an' we couldn't find one floatin' box of +canned goods. There was a lot of splinters, but where they come from +we didn't know. By this time my dander was up, an' I just pitched +around savage. That little ca'tridge wasn't no good, an' I didn't +intend to stand any more foolin'. We just rowed back to the other +wreck, an' I called to the ba'try man to come down, an' bring some +bigger ca'tridges with him, fur if we was goin' to do anything we might +as well do it right. So he got down with a package of bigger ones, an' +jumped into the boat. The cap'n he called out to us to be keerful, an' +Tom Simmons leaned over the rail an' swored; but I didn't pay no +'tention to nuther of 'em, an' we pulled away. +</P> + +<P> +"When I got aboard the Mary Auguster, I says to the bat'ry man: `We +don't want no nonsense this time, an' I want you to put in enough +ca'tridges to heave up somethin' that'll do fur a Christmas dinner. I +don't know how the cargo is stored, but you kin put one big ca'tridge +'midship, another for'ard, an' another aft, an' one or nuther of 'em +oughter fetch up somethin'.' Well, we got the three ca'tridges into +place. They was a good deal bigger than the one we fust used, an' we +j'ined 'em all to one wire, an' then we rowed back, carryin' the long +wire with us. When we reached the steamer, me an' Andy was a-goin' to +stay in the boat as we did afore, but the cap'n sung out that he +wouldn't allow the bat'ry to be touched off till we come aboard. +`Ther's got to be fair play,' says he. `It's your vittles, but it's my +side that's doin' the work. After we've blasted her this time you two +can go in the boat an' see what there is to git hold of, but two of my +men must go along.' So me an' Andy had to go on deck, an' two big +fellers was detailed to go with us in the little boat when the time +come, an' then the bat'ry man he teched her off. +</P> + +<P> +"Well, sir, the pop that followed that tech was somethin' to remember. +It shuck the water, it shuck the air, an' it shuck the hull we was on. +A reg'lar cloud of smoke an' flyin' bits of things rose up out of the +Mary Auguster; an' when that smoke cleared away, an' the water was all +b'ilin' with the splash of various-sized hunks that come rainin' down +from the sky, what was left of the Mary Auguster was sprinkled over the +sea like a wooden carpet fur water-birds to walk on. +</P> + +<P> +"Some of the men sung out one thing, an' some another, an' I could hear +Tom Simmons swear; but Andy an' me said never a word, but scuttled down +into the boat, follered close by the two men who was to go with us. +Then we rowed like devils fur the lot of stuff that was bobbin' about +on the water, out where the Mary Auguster had been. In we went among +the floatin' spars and ship's timbers, I keepin' the things off with an +oar, the two men rowin', an' Andy in the bow. +</P> + +<P> +"Suddenly Andy give a yell, an' then he reached himself for'ard with +sech a bounce that I thought he'd go overboard. But up he come in a +minnit, his two 'leven-inch hands gripped round a box. He sot down in +the bottom of the boat with the box on his lap an' his eyes screwed on +some letters that was stamped on one end. `Pidjin-pies!' he sings out. +`'Tain't turkeys, nor 'tain't cranberries but, by the Lord Harry, it's +Christmas pies all the same!' After that Andy didn't do no more work, +but sot holdin' that box as if it had been his fust baby. But we kep' +pushin' on to see what else there was. It's my 'pinion that the +biggest part of that bark's cargo was blowed into mince-meat, an' the +most of the rest of it was so heavy that it sunk. But it wasn't all +busted up, an' it didn't all sink. There was a big piece of wreck with +a lot of boxes stove into the timbers, and some of these had in 'em +beef ready b'iled an' packed into cans, an' there was other kinds of +meat, an' dif'rent sorts of vegetables, an' one box of turtle soup. I +looked at every one of 'em as we took 'em in, an' when we got the +little boat pretty well loaded I wanted to still keep on searchin'; but +the men they said that shore boat 'u'd sink if we took in any more +cargo, an' so we put back, I feelin' glummer'n I oughter felt, fur I +had begun to be afeared that canned fruit, sech as peaches, was heavy, +an' li'ble to sink. +</P> + +<P> +"As soon as we had got our boxes aboard, four fresh men put out in the +boat, an' after a while they come back with another load. An' I was +mighty keerful to read the names on all the boxes. Some was meat-pies, +an' some was salmon, an' some was potted herrin's, an' some was +lobsters. But nary a thing could I see that ever had growed on a tree. +</P> + +<P> +"Well, sir, there was three loads brought in altogether, an' the +Christmas dinner we had on the for'ard deck of that steamer's hull was +about the jolliest one that was ever seen of a hot day aboard of a +wreck in the Pacific Ocean. The cap'n kept good order, an' when all +was ready the tops was jerked off the boxes, and each man grabbed a can +an' opened it with his knife. When he had cleaned it out, he tuk +another without doin' much questionin' as to the bill of fare. Whether +anybody got pidjin-pie 'cept Andy, I can't say, but the way we piled in +Delmoniker prog would 'a' made people open their eyes as was eatin' +their Christmas dinners on shore that day. Some of the things would +'a' been better cooked a little more, or het up, but we was too fearful +hungry to wait fur that, an' they was tiptop as they was. +</P> + +<P> +"The cap'n went out afterwards, an' towed in a couple of bar'ls of +flour that was only part soaked through, an' he got some other plain +prog that would do fur future use. But none of us give our minds to +stuff like this arter the glorious Christmas dinner that we'd quarried +out of the Mary Auguster. Every man that wasn't on duty went below and +turned in fur a snooze—all 'cept me, an' I didn't feel just altogether +satisfied. To be sure, I'd had an A1 dinner, an', though a little +mixed, I'd never eat a jollier one on any Christmas that I kin look +back at. But, fur all that, there was a hanker inside o' me. I hadn't +got all I'd laid out to git when we teched off the Mary Auguster. The +day was blazin' hot, an' a lot of the things I'd eat was pretty +peppery. `Now,' thinks I, `if there had been just one can o' peaches +sech as I seen shinin' in the stars last night!' An' just then, as I +was walkin' aft, all by myself, I seed lodged on the stump of the +mizzenmast a box with one corner druv down among the splinters. It was +half split open, an' I could see the tin cans shinin' through the +crack. I give one jump at it, an' wrenched the side off. On the top +of the first can I seed was a picture of a big white peach with green +leaves. That box had been blowed up so high that if it had come down +anywhere 'cept among them splinters it would 'a' smashed itself to +flinders, or killed somebody. So fur as I know, it was the only thing +that fell nigh us, an' by George, sir, I got it! When I had finished a +can of 'em I hunted up Andy, an' then we went aft an' eat some more. +`Well,' says Andy, as we was a-eatin', `how d'ye feel now about blowin' +up your wife, an' your house, an' that little schooner you was goin' to +own?' +</P> + +<P> +"`Andy,' says I, `this is the joyfulest Christmas I've had yit, an' if +I was to live till twenty hundred I don't b'lieve I'd have no joyfuler, +with things comin' in so pat; so don't you throw no shadders.' +</P> + +<P> +"`Shadders!' says Andy. `That ain't me. I leave that sort of thing +fur Tom Simmons.' +</P> + +<P> +"`Shadders is cool,' says I, `an' I kin go to sleep under all he +throws.' +</P> + +<P> +"Well, sir," continued old Silas, putting his hand on the tiller and +turning his face seaward, "if Tom Simmons had kept command of that +wreck, we all would 'a' laid there an' waited an' waited till some of +us was starved, an' the others got nothin' fur it, fur the cap'n never +mended his engine, an' it wasn't more'n a week afore we was took off, +an' then it was by a sailin' vessel, which left the hull of the Water +Crescent behind her, just as she would 'a' had to leave the Mary +Auguster if that jolly old Christmas wreck had been there. +</P> + +<P> +"An' now, sir," said Silas, "d'ye see that stretch o' little ripples +over yander, lookin' as if it was a lot o' herrin' turnin' over to dry +their sides? Do you know what that is? That's the supper wind. That +means coffee, an' hot cakes, an' a bit of br'iled fish, an' pertaters, +an' p'r'aps, if the old woman feels in a partiklar good humor, some +canned peaches—big white uns, cut in half, with a holler place in the +middle filled with cool, sweet juice." +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<A NAME="chap09"></A> +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +MY WELL AND WHAT CAME OUT OF IT +</H3> + +<P> +Early in my married life I bought a small country estate which my wife +and I looked upon as a paradise. After enjoying its delight for a +little more than a year our souls were saddened by the discovery that +our Eden contained a serpent. This was an insufficient water-supply. +</P> + +<P> +It had been a rainy season when we first went there, and for a long +time our cisterns gave us full aqueous satisfaction, but early this +year a drought had set in, and we were obliged to be exceedingly +careful of our water. +</P> + +<P> +It was quite natural that the scarcity of water for domestic purposes +should affect my wife much more than it did me, and perceiving the +discontent which was growing in her mind, I determined to dig a well. +The very next day I began to look for a well-digger. Such an +individual was not easy to find, for in the region in which I lived +wells had become unfashionable; but I determined to persevere in my +search, and in about a week I found a well-digger. +</P> + +<P> +He was a man of somewhat rough exterior, but of an ingratiating turn of +mind. It was easy to see that it was his earnest desire to serve me. +</P> + +<P> +"And now, then," said he, when we had had a little conversation about +terms, "the first thing to do is to find out where there is water. +Have you a peach-tree on the place?" We walked to such a tree, and he +cut therefrom a forked twig. +</P> + +<P> +"I thought," said I, "that divining-rods were always of hazel wood." +</P> + +<P> +"A peach twig will do quite as well," said he, and I have since found +that he was right. Divining-rods of peach will turn and find water +quite as well as those of hazel or any other kind of wood. +</P> + +<P> +He took an end of the twig in each hand, and, with the point projecting +in front of him, he slowly walked along over the grass in my little +orchard. Presently the point of the twig seemed to bend itself +downward toward the ground. +</P> + +<P> +"There," said he, stopping, "you will find water here." +</P> + +<P> +"I do not want a well here," said I. "This is at the bottom of a hill, +and my barn-yard is at the top. Besides, it is too far from the house." +</P> + +<P> +"Very good," said he. "We will try somewhere else." +</P> + +<P> +His rod turned at several other places, but I had objections to all of +them. A sanitary engineer had once visited me, and he had given me a +great deal of advice about drainage, and I knew what to avoid. +</P> + +<P> +We crossed the ridge of the hill into the low ground on the other side. +Here were no buildings, nothing which would interfere with the purity +of a well. My well-digger walked slowly over the ground with his +divining-rod. Very soon he exclaimed: "Here is water!" And picking +up a stick, he sharpened one end of it and drove it into the ground. +Then he took a string from his pocket, and making a loop in one end, he +put it over the stick. +</P> + +<P> +"What are you going to do?" I asked. +</P> + +<P> +"I am going to make a circle four feet in diameter," he said. "We have +to dig the well as wide as that, you know." +</P> + +<P> +"But I do not want a well here," said I. "It's too close to the wall. +I could not build a house over it. It would not do at all." +</P> + +<P> +He stood up and looked at me. "Well, sir," said he, "will you tell me +where you would like to have a well?" +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," said I. "I would like to have it over there in the corner of the +hedge. It would be near enough to the house; it would have a warm +exposure, which will be desirable in winter; and the little house which +I intend to build over it would look better there than anywhere else." +</P> + +<P> +He took his divining-rod and went to the spot I had indicated. "Is +this the place?" he asked wishing to be sure he had understood me. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," I replied. +</P> + +<P> +He put his twig in position, and in a few seconds it turned in the +direction of the ground. Then he drove down a stick, marked out a +circle, and the next day he came with two men and a derrick, and began +to dig my well. +</P> + +<P> +When they had gone down twenty-five feet they found water, and when +they had progressed a few feet deeper they began to be afraid of +drowning. I thought they ought to go deeper, but the well-digger said +that they could not dig without first taking out the water, and that +the water came in as fast as they bailed it out, and he asked me to put +it to myself and tell him how they could dig it deeper. I put the +question to myself, but could find no answer. I also laid the matter +before some specialists, and it was generally agreed that if water came +in as fast as it was taken out, nothing more could be desired. The +well was, therefore, pronounced deep enough. It was lined with great +tiles, nearly a yard in diameter, and my well-digger, after +congratulating me on finding water so easily, bade me good-by and +departed with his men and his derrick. +</P> + +<P> +On the other side of the wall which bounded my grounds, and near which +my well had been dug, there ran a country lane, leading nowhere in +particular, which seemed to be there for the purpose of allowing people +to pass my house, who might otherwise be obliged to stop. +</P> + +<P> +Along this lane my neighbors would pass, and often strangers drove by, +and as my well could easily be seen over the low stone wall, its +construction had excited a great deal of interest. Some of the people +who drove by were summer folks from the city, and I am sure, from +remarks I overheard, that it was thought a very queer thing to dig for +water. Of course they must have known that people used to do this in +the olden times, even as far back as the time of Jacob and Rebecca, but +the expressions of some of their faces indicated that they remembered +that this was the nineteenth century. +</P> + +<P> +My neighbors, however, were all rural people, and much more intelligent +in regard to water-supplies. One of them, Phineas Colwell by name, +took a more lively interest in my operations than did any one else. He +was a man of about fifty years of age, who had been a soldier. This +fact was kept alive in the minds of his associates by his dress, a part +of which was always military. If he did not wear an old fatigue-jacket +with brass buttons, he wore his blue trousers, or, perhaps, a waistcoat +that belonged to his uniform, and if he wore none of these, his +military hat would appear upon his head. I think he must also have +been a sailor, judging from the little gold rings in his ears. But +when I first knew him he was a carpenter, who did mason-work whenever +any of the neighbors had any jobs of the sort. He also worked in +gardens by the day, and had told me that he understood the care of +horses and was a very good driver. He sometimes worked on farms, +especially at harvest-time, and I know he could paint, for he once +showed me a fence which he said he had painted. I frequently saw him, +because he always seemed to be either going to his work or coming from +it. In fact, he appeared to consider actual labor in the light of a +bad habit which he wished to conceal, and which he was continually +endeavoring to reform. +</P> + +<P> +Phineas walked along our lane at least once a day, and whenever he saw +me he told me something about the well. He did not approve of the +place I had selected for it. If he had been digging a well he would +have put it in a very different place. When I had talked with him for +some time and explained why I had chosen this spot, he would say that +perhaps I was right, and begin to talk of something else. But the next +time I saw him he would again assert that if he had been digging that +well he would not have put it there. +</P> + +<P> +About a quarter of a mile from my house, at a turn of the lane, lived +Mrs. Betty Perch. She was a widow with about twelve children. A few +of these were her own, and the others she had inherited from two +sisters who had married and died, and whose husbands, having proved +their disloyalty by marrying again, were not allowed by the indignant +Mrs. Perch to resume possession of their offspring. The casual +observer might have supposed the number of these children to be very +great,—fifteen or perhaps even twenty,—for if he happened to see a +group of them on the door-step, he would see a lot more if he looked +into the little garden; and under some cedar-trees at the back of the +house there were always some of them on fine days. But perhaps they +sought to increase their apparent number, and ran from one place to +another to be ready to meet observation, like the famous clown +Grimaldi, who used to go through his performances at one London +theatre, and then dash off in his paint and motley to another, so that +perambulating theatre-going men might imagine that there were two +greatest clowns in the world. +</P> + +<P> +When Mrs. Perch had time she sewed for the neighbors, and, whether she +had time or not, she was always ready to supply them with news. From +the moment she heard I was going to dig a well she took a vital +interest in it. Her own water-supply was unsatisfactory, as she +depended upon a little spring which sometimes dried up in summer, and +should my well turn out to be a good one, she knew I would not object +to her sending the children for pails of water on occasions. +</P> + +<P> +"It will be fun for them," she said, "and if your water really is good +it will often come in very well for me. Mr. Colwell tells me," she +continued, "that you put your well in the wrong place. He is a +practical man and knows all about wells, and I do hope that for your +sake he may be wrong." +</P> + +<P> +My neighbors were generally pessimists. Country people are +proverbially prudent, and pessimism is prudence. We feel safe when we +doubt the success of another, because if he should succeed we can say +we were glad we were mistaken, and so step from a position of good +judgment to one of generous disposition without feeling that we have +changed our plane of merit. But the optimist often gets himself into +terrible scrapes, for if he is wrong he cannot say he is glad of it. +</P> + +<P> +But, whatever else he may be, a pessimist is depressing, and it was, +therefore, a great pleasure to me to have a friend who was an +out-and-out optimist. In fact, he might be called a working optimist. +He lived about six miles from my house, and had a hobby, which was +natural phenomena. He was always on the lookout for that sort of +thing, and when he found it he would study its nature and effect. He +was a man in the maturity of youth, and if the estate on which he lived +had not belonged to his mother, he would have spent much time and money +in investigating its natural phenomena. He often drove over to see me, +and always told me how glad he would be if he had an opportunity of +digging a well. +</P> + +<P> +"I have the wildest desire," he said, "to know what is in the earth +under our place, and if it should so happen in the course of time that +the limits of earthly existence should be reached by—I mean if the +estate should come into my hands—I would go down, down, down, until I +had found out all that could be discovered. To own a plug of earth +four thousand miles long and only to know what is on the surface of the +upper end of it is unmanly. We might as well be grazing beasts." +</P> + +<P> +He was sorry that I was digging only for water, because water is a very +commonplace thing, but he was quite sure I would get it, and when my +well was finished he was one of the first to congratulate me. +</P> + +<P> +"But if I had been in your place," said he, "with full right to do as I +pleased, I would not have let those men go away. I would have set them +to work in some place where there would be no danger of getting +water,—at least, for a long time,—and then you would have found out +what are the deeper treasures of your land." +</P> + +<P> +Having finished my well, I now set about getting the water into my +residence near by. I built a house over the well and put in it a +little engine, and by means of a system of pipes, like the arteries and +veins of the human body, I proposed to distribute the water to the +various desirable points in my house. +</P> + +<P> +The engine was the heart, which should start the circulation, which +should keep it going, and which should send throbbing through every +pipe the water which, if it were not our life, was very necessary to it. +</P> + +<P> +When all was ready we started the engine, and in a very short time we +discovered that something was wrong. For fifteen or twenty minutes +water flowed into the tank at the top of the house, with a sound that +was grander in the ears of my wife and myself than the roar of Niagara, +and then it stopped. Investigation proved that the flow had stopped +because there was no more water in the well. +</P> + +<P> +It is needless to detail the examinations, investigations, and the +multitude of counsels and opinions with which our minds were filled for +the next few days. It was plain to see that although this well was +fully able to meet the demands of a hand-pump or of bailing buckets, +the water did not flow into it as fast as it could be pumped out by an +engine. Therefore, for the purposes of supplying the circulation of my +domestic water system, the well was declared a failure. +</P> + +<P> +My non-success was much talked about in the neighborhood, and we +received a great deal of sympathy and condolence. Phineas Colwell was +not surprised at the outcome of the affair. He had said that the well +had been put in the wrong place. Mrs. Betty was not only surprised, +but disgusted. +</P> + +<P> +"It is all very well for you," she said, "who could afford to buy water +if it was necessary, but it is very different with the widow and the +orphan. If I had not supposed you were going to have a real well, I +would have had my spring cleaned out and deepened. I could have had it +done in the early summer, but it is of no use now. The spring has +dried up." +</P> + +<P> +She told a neighbor that she believed the digging of my well had dried +up her spring, and that that was the way of this world, where the widow +and the orphan were sure to come out at the little end. +</P> + +<P> +Of course I did not submit to defeat—at least, not without a struggle. +I had a well, and if anything could be done to make that well supply me +with water, I was going to do it. I consulted specialists, and, after +careful consideration of the matter, they agreed that it would be +unadvisable for me to attempt to deepen my present well, as there was +reason to suppose there was very little water in the place where I had +dug it, and that the very best thing I could do would be to try a +driven well. As I had already excavated about thirty feet, that was so +much gain to me, and if I should have a six-inch pipe put into my +present well and then driven down and down until it came to a place +where there was plenty of water, I would have all I wanted. +</P> + +<P> +How far down the pipe would have to be driven, of course they did not +know, but they all agreed that if I drove deep enough I would get all +the water I wanted. This was the only kind of a well, they said, which +one could sink as deep as he pleased without being interfered with by +the water at the bottom. My wife and I then considered the matter, and +ultimately decided that it would be a waste of the money which we had +already spent upon the engine, the pipes, and the little house, and, as +there was nothing else to be done but to drive a well, we would have a +well driven. +</P> + +<P> +Of course we were both very sorry that the work must be begun again, +but I was especially dissatisfied, for the weather was getting cold, +there was already snow upon the ground, and I was told that work could +not be carried on in winter weather. I lost no time, however, in +making a contract with a well-driver, who assured me that as soon as +the working season should open, which probably would be very early in +the spring, he would come to my place and begin to drive my well. +</P> + +<P> +The season did open, and so did the pea-blossoms, and the pods actually +began to fill before I saw that well-driver again. I had had a good +deal of correspondence with him in the meantime, urging him to prompt +action, but he always had some good reason for delay. (I found out +afterwards that he was busy fulfilling a contract made before mine, in +which he promised to drive a well as soon as the season should open.) +</P> + +<P> +At last—it was early in the summer—he came with his derricks, a +steam-engine, a trip-hammer, and a lot of men. They took off the roof +of my house, removed the engine, and set to work. +</P> + +<P> +For many a long day, and I am sorry to say for many a longer night, +that trip-hammer hammered and banged. On the next day after the +night-work began, one of my neighbors came to me to know what they did +that for. I told him they were anxious to get through. +</P> + +<P> +"Get through what?" said he. "The earth? If they do that, and your +six-inch pipe comes out in a Chinaman's back yard, he will sue you for +damages." +</P> + +<P> +When the pipe had been driven through the soft stratum under the old +well, and began to reach firmer ground, the pounding and shaking of the +earth became worse and worse. My wife was obliged to leave home with +our child. +</P> + +<P> +"If he is to do without both water and sleep," said she, "he cannot +long survive." And I agreed with her. +</P> + +<P> +She departed for a pleasant summer resort where her married sister with +her child was staying, and from week to week I received very pleasant +letters from her, telling me of the charms of the place, and dwelling +particularly upon the abundance of cool spring water with which the +house was supplied. +</P> + +<P> +While this terrible pounding was going on I heard various reports of +its effect upon my neighbors. One of them, an agriculturist, with whom +I had always been on the best of terms, came with a clouded brow. +</P> + +<P> +"When I first felt those shakes," he said, "I thought they were the +effects of seismic disturbances, and I did not mind, but when I found +it was your well I thought I ought to come over to speak about it. I +do not object to the shaking of my barn, because my man tells me the +continual jolting is thrashing out the oats and wheat, but I do not +like to have all my apples and pears shaken off my trees. And then," +said he, "I have a late brood of chickens, and they cannot walk, +because every time they try to make a step they are jolted into the air +about a foot. And again, we have had to give up having soup. We like +soup, but we do not care to have it spout up like a fountain whenever +that hammer comes down." +</P> + +<P> +I was grieved to trouble this friend, and I asked him what I should do. +"Do you want me to stop the work on the well?" said I. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, no," said he, heartily. "Go on with the work. You must have +water, and we will try to stand the bumping. I dare say it is good for +dyspepsia, and the cows are getting used to having the grass jammed up +against their noses. Go ahead; we can stand it in the daytime, but if +you could stop the night-work we would be very glad. Some people may +think it a well-spring of pleasure to be bounced out of bed, but I +don't." +</P> + +<P> +Mrs. Perch came to me with a face like a squeezed lemon, and asked me +if I could lend her five nails. +</P> + +<P> +"What sort?" said I. +</P> + +<P> +"The kind you nail clapboards on with," said she. "There is one of +them been shook entirely off my house by your well. I am in hopes that +before the rest are all shook off I shall get in some money that is +owing me and can afford to buy nails for myself." +</P> + +<P> +I stopped the night-work, but this was all I could do for these +neighbors. +</P> + +<P> +My optimist friend was delighted when he heard of my driven well. He +lived so far away that he and his mother were not disturbed by the +jarring of the ground. Now he was sure that some of the internal +secrets of the earth would be laid bare, and he rode or drove over +every day to see what we were getting out of the well. I know that he +was afraid we would soon get water, but was too kind-hearted to say so. +</P> + +<P> +One day the pipe refused to go deeper. No matter how hard it was +struck, it bounced up again. When some of the substance it had struck +was brought up it looked like French chalk, and my optimist eagerly +examined it. +</P> + +<P> +"A French-chalk mine," said he, "would not be a bad thing, but I hoped +that you had struck a bed of mineral gutta-percha. That would be a +grand find." +</P> + +<P> +But the chalk-bed was at last passed, and we began again to bring up +nothing but common earth. +</P> + +<P> +"I suppose," said my optimist to me, one morning, "that you must soon +come to water, and if you do I hope it will be hot water." +</P> + +<P> +"Hot water!" I exclaimed. "I do not want that." +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, yes, you would, if you had thought about it as much as I have," he +replied. "I lay awake for hours last night, thinking what would happen +if you struck hot water. In the first place, it would be absolutely +pure, because, even if it were possible for germs and bacilli to get +down so deep, they would be boiled before you got them, and then you +could cool that water for drinking. When fresh it would be already +heated for cooking and hot baths. And then—just think of it!—you +could introduce the hot-water system of heating into your house, and +there would be the hot water always ready. But the great thing would +be your garden. Think of the refuse hot water circulating in pipes up +and down and under all your beds! That garden would bloom in the +winter as others do in the summer; at least, you could begin to have +Lima-beans and tomatoes as soon as the frost was out of the air." +</P> + +<P> +I laughed. "It would take a lot of pumping," I said, "to do all that +with the hot water." +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, I forgot to say," he cried, with sparkling eyes, "that I do not +believe you would ever have any more pumping to do. You have now gone +down so far that I am sure whatever you find will force itself up. It +will spout high into the air or through all your pipes, and run always." +</P> + +<P> +Phineas Colwell was by when this was said, and he must have gone down +to Mrs. Betty Perch's house to talk it over with her, for in the +afternoon she came to see me. +</P> + +<P> +"I understand," said she, "that you are trying to get hot water out of +your well, and that there is likely to be a lot more than you need, so +that it will run down by the side of the road. I just want to say that +if a stream of hot water comes down past my house some of the children +will be bound to get into it and be scalded to death, and I came to say +that if that well is going to squirt b'iling water I'd like to have +notice so that I can move, though where a widow with so many orphans is +going to move to nobody knows. Mr. Colwell says that if you had got +him to tell you where to put that well there would have been no danger +of this sort of thing." +</P> + +<P> +The next day the optimist came to me, his face fairly blazing with a +new idea. "I rode over on purpose to urge you," he cried, "if you +should strike hot water, not to stop there. Go on, and, by George! you +may strike fire." +</P> + +<P> +"Heavens!" I cried. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, quite the opposite," said he. "But do not let us joke. I think +that would be the grandest thing of this age. Think of a fire well, +with the flames shooting up perhaps a hundred feet into the air!" +</P> + +<P> +I wish Phineas Colwell had not been there. As it was, he turned pale +and sat down on the wall. +</P> + +<P> +"You look astonished!" exclaimed the optimist, "but listen to me. You +have not thought of this thing as I have. If you should strike fire +your fortune would be made. By a system of reflectors you could light +up the whole country. By means of tiles and pipes this region could be +made tropical. You could warm all the houses in the neighborhood with +hot air. And then the power you could generate—just think of it! +Heat is power; the cost of power is the fuel. You could furnish power +to all who wanted it. You could fill this region with industries. My +dear sir, you must excuse my agitation, but if you should strike fire +there is no limit to the possibilities of achievement." +</P> + +<P> +"But I want water," said I. "Fire would not take the place of that." +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, water is a trifle," said he. "You could have pipes laid from +town; it is only about two miles. But fire! Nobody has yet gone down +deep enough for that. You have your future in your hands." +</P> + +<P> +As I did not care to connect my future with fire, this idea did not +strike me very forcibly, but it struck Phineas Colwell. He did not say +anything to me, but after I had gone he went to the well-drivers. +</P> + +<P> +"If you feel them pipes getting hot," he said to them, "I warn you to +stop. I have been in countries where there are volcanoes, and I know +what they are. There's enough of them in this world, and there's no +need of making new ones." +</P> + +<P> +In the afternoon a wagoner, who happened to be passing, brought me a +note from Mrs. Perch, very badly spelled, asking if I would let one of +my men bring her a pail of water, for she could not think of coming +herself or letting any of the children come near my place if spouting +fires were expected. +</P> + +<P> +The well-driving had gone on and on, with intermissions on account of +sickness in the families of the various workmen, until it had reached +the limit which I had fixed, and we had not found water in sufficient +quantity, hot or cold, nor had we struck fire, or anything else worth +having. +</P> + +<P> +The well-drivers and some specialists were of the opinion that if I +were to go ten, twenty, or perhaps a hundred feet deeper, I would be +very likely to get all the water I wanted. But, of course, they could +not tell how deep they must go, for some wells were over a thousand +feet deep. I shook my head at this. There seemed to be only one thing +certain about this drilling business, and that was the expense. I +declined to go any deeper. +</P> + +<P> +"I think," a facetious neighbor said to me, "it would be cheaper for +you to buy a lot of Apollinaris water,—at wholesale rates, of +course,—and let your men open so many bottles a day and empty them +into your tank. You would find that would pay better in the long run." +</P> + +<P> +Phineas Colwell told me that when he had informed Mrs. Perch that I was +going to stop operations, she was in a dreadful state of mind. After +all she had undergone, she said, it was simply cruel to think of my +stopping before I got water, and that after having dried up her spring! +</P> + +<P> +This is what Phineas said she said, but when next I met her she told me +that he had declared that if I had put the well where he thought it +ought to be, I should have been having all the water I wanted before +now. +</P> + +<P> +My optimist was dreadfully cast down when he heard that I would drive +no deeper. +</P> + +<P> +"I have been afraid of this," he said. "I have, been afraid of it. +And if circumstances had so arranged themselves that I should have +command of money, I should have been glad to assume the expense of +deeper explorations. I have been thinking a great deal about the +matter, and I feel quite sure that even if you did not get water or +anything else that might prove of value to you, it would be a great +advantage to have a pipe sunk into the earth to the depth of, say, one +thousand feet." +</P> + +<P> +"What possible advantage could that be?" I asked. +</P> + +<P> +"I will tell you," he said. "You would then have one of the grandest +opportunities ever offered to man of constructing a gravity-engine. +This would be an engine which would be of no expense at all to run. It +would need no fuel. Gravity would be the power. It would work a pump +splendidly. You could start it when you liked and stop it when you +liked." +</P> + +<P> +"Pump!" said I. "What is the good of a pump without water?" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, of course you would have to have water," he answered. "But, no +matter how you get it, you will have to pump it up to your tank so as +to make it circulate over your house. Now, my gravity-pump would do +this beautifully. You see, the pump would be arranged with cog-wheels +and all that sort of thing, and the power would be supplied by a +weight, which would be a cylinder of lead or iron, fastened to a rope +and run down inside your pipe. Just think of it! It would run down a +thousand feet, and where is there anything worked by weight that has +such a fall as that?" +</P> + +<P> +I laughed. "That is all very well," said I. "But how about the power +required to wind that weight up again when it got to the bottom? I +should have to have an engine to do that." +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, no," said he. "I have planned the thing better than that. You +see, the greater the weight the greater the power and the velocity. +Now, if you take a solid cylinder of lead about four inches in +diameter, so that it would slip easily down your pipe,—you might +grease it, for that matter,—and twenty feet in length, it would be an +enormous weight, and in slowly descending for about an hour a day—for +that would be long enough for your pumping—and going down a thousand +feet, it would run your engine for a year. Now, then, at the end of +the year you could not expect to haul that weight up again. You would +have a trigger arrangement which would detach it from the rope when it +got to the bottom. Then you would wind up your rope,—a man could do +that in a short time,—and you would attach another cylinder of lead, +and that would run your engine for another year, minus a few days, +because it would only go down nine hundred and eighty feet. The next +year you would put on another cylinder, and so on. I have not worked +out the figures exactly, but I think that in this way your engine would +run for thirty years before the pipe became entirely filled with +cylinders. That would be probably as long as you would care to have +water forced into the house." +</P> + +<P> +"Yes"' said I, "I think that is likely." +</P> + +<P> +He saw that his scheme did not strike me favorably. Suddenly a light +flashed across his face. +</P> + +<P> +"I tell you what you can do with your pipe," he said, "just as it is. +You can set up a clock over it which would run for forty years without +winding." +</P> + +<P> +I smiled, and he turned sadly away to his horse; but he had not ridden +ten yards before he came back and called to me over the wall. +</P> + +<P> +"If the earth at the bottom of your pipe should ever yield to pressure +and give way, and if water or gas, or—anything, should be squirted out +of it, I beg you will let me know as soon as possible." +</P> + +<P> +I promised to do so. +</P> + +<P> +When the pounding was at an end my wife and child came home. But the +season continued dry, and even their presence could not counteract the +feeling of aridity which seemed to permeate everything which belonged +to us, material or immaterial. We had a great deal of commiseration +from our neighbors. I think even Mrs. Betty Perch began to pity us a +little, for her spring had begun to trickle again in a small way, and +she sent word to me that if we were really in need of water she would +be willing to divide with us. Phineas Colwell was sorry for us, of +course, but he could not help feeling and saying that if I had +consulted him the misfortune would have been prevented. +</P> + +<P> +It was late in the summer when my wife returned, and when she made her +first visit of inspection to the grounds and gardens, her eyes, of +course, fell upon the unfinished well. She was shocked. +</P> + +<P> +"I never saw such a scene of wreckage," she said. "It looks like a +Western town after a cyclone. I think the best thing you can do is to +have this dreadful litter cleared up, the ground smoothed and raked, +the wall mended, and the roof put back on that little house, and then +if we can make anybody believe it is an ice-house, so much the better." +</P> + +<P> +This was good advice, and I sent for a man to put the vicinity of the +well in order and give it the air of neatness which characterizes the +rest of our home. +</P> + +<P> +The man who came was named Mr. Barnet. He was a contemplative fellow +with a pipe in his mouth. After having worked at the place for half a +day he sent for me and said: +</P> + +<P> +"I'll tell you what I would do if I was in your place. I'd put that +pump-house in order, and I'd set up the engine, and put the pump down +into that thirty-foot well you first dug, and I'd pump water into my +house." +</P> + +<P> +I looked at him in amazement. +</P> + +<P> +"There's lots of water in that well," he continued, "and if there's +that much now in this drought, you will surely have ever so much more +when the weather isn't so dry. I have measured the water, and I know." +</P> + +<P> +I could not understand him. It seemed to me that he was talking +wildly. He filled his pipe and lighted it and sat upon the wall. +</P> + +<P> +"Now," said he, after he had taken a few puffs, "I'll tell you where +the trouble's been with your well. People are always in too big a +hurry in this world about all sorts of things as well as wells. I am a +well-digger and I know all about them. We know if there is any water +in the ground it will always find its way to the deepest hole there is, +and we dig a well so as to give it a deep hole to go to in the place +where we want it. But you can't expect the water to come to that hole +just the very day it's finished. Of course you will get some, because +it's right there in the neighborhood, but there is always a lot more +that will come if you give it time. It's got to make little channels +and passages for itself, and of course it takes time to do that. It's +like settling up a new country. Only a few pioneers come at first, and +you have to wait for the population to flow in. This being a dry +season, and the water in the ground a little sluggish on that account, +it was a good while finding out where your well was. If I had happened +along when you was talking about a well, I think I should have said to +you that I knew a proverb which would about fit your case, and that is: +`Let well enough alone.'" +</P> + +<P> +I felt like taking this good man by the hand, but I did not. I only +told him to go ahead and do everything that was proper. +</P> + +<P> +The next morning, as I was going to the well, I saw Phineas Colwell +coming down the lane and Mrs. Betty Perch coming up it. I did not wish +them to question me, so I stepped behind some bushes. When they met +they stopped. +</P> + +<P> +"Upon my word!" exclaimed Mrs. Betty, "if he isn't going to work again +on that everlasting well! If he's got so much money he don't know what +to do with it, I could tell him that there's people in this world, and +not far away either, who would be the better for some of it. It's a +sin and a shame and an abomination. Do you believe, Mr. Colwell, that +there is the least chance in the world of his ever getting water enough +out of that well to shave himself with?" +</P> + +<P> +"Mrs. Perch," said Phineas, "it ain't no use talking about that well. +It ain't no use, and it never can be no use, because it's in the wrong +place. If he ever pumps water out of that well into his house I'll +do—" +</P> + +<P> +"What will you do?" asked Mr. Barnet, who just then appeared from the +recesses of the engine-house. +</P> + +<P> +"I'll do anything on this earth that you choose to name," said Phineas. +"I am safe, whatever it is." +</P> + +<P> +"Well, then," said Mr. Barnet, knocking the ashes from his pipe +preparatory to filling it again, "will you marry Mrs. Perch?" +</P> + +<P> +Phineas laughed. "Yes," he said. "I promised I would do anything, and +I'll promise that." +</P> + +<P> +"A slim chance for me," said Mrs. Betty, "even if I'd have you." And +she marched on with her nose in the air. +</P> + +<P> +When Mr. Barnet got fairly to work with his derrick, his men, and his +buckets, he found that there was a good deal more to do than he had +expected. The well-drivers had injured the original well by breaking +some of the tiles which lined it, and these had to be taken out and +others put in, and in the course of this work other improvements +suggested themselves and were made. Several times operations were +delayed by sickness in the family of Mr. Barnet, and also in the +families of his workmen, but still the work went on in a very fair +manner, although much more slowly than had been supposed by any one. +But in the course of time—I will not say how much time—the work was +finished, the engine was in its place, and it pumped water into my +house, and every day since then it has pumped all the water we need, +pure, cold, and delicious. +</P> + +<P> +Knowing the promise Phineas Colwell had made, and feeling desirous of +having everything which concerned my well settled and finished, I went +to look for him to remind him of his duty toward Mrs. Perch, but I +could not find that naval and military mechanical agriculturist. He +had gone away to take a job or a contract,—I could not discover +which,—and he has not since appeared in our neighborhood. Mrs. Perch +is very severe on me about this. +</P> + +<P> +"There's plenty of bad things come out of that well," she said, "but I +never thought anything bad enough would come out of it to make Mr. +Colwell go away and leave me to keep on being a widow with all them +orphans." +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<A NAME="chap10"></A> +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +MR. TOLMAN +</H3> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman was a gentleman whose apparent age was of a varying +character. At times, when deep in thought on business matters or other +affairs, one might have thought him fifty-five or fifty-seven, or even +sixty. Ordinarily, however, when things were running along in a +satisfactory and commonplace way, he appeared to be about fifty years +old, while upon some extraordinary occasions, when the world assumed an +unusually attractive aspect, his age seemed to run down to forty-five +or less. +</P> + +<P> +He was the head of a business firm. In fact, he was the only member of +it. The firm was known as Pusey and Co. But Pusey had long been dead +and the "Co.," of which Mr. Tolman had been a member, was dissolved. +Our elderly hero, having bought out the business, firm-name and all, +for many years had carried it on with success and profit. His +counting-house was a small and quiet place, but a great deal of money +had been made in it. Mr. Tolman was rich—very rich indeed. +</P> + +<P> +And yet, as he sat in his counting-room one winter evening, he looked +his oldest. He had on his hat and his overcoat, his gloves and his fur +collar. Every one else in the establishment had gone home, and he, +with the keys in his hand, was ready to lock up and leave also. He +often stayed later than any one else, and left the keys with Mr. +Canterfield, the head clerk, as he passed his house on his way home. +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman seemed in no hurry to go. He simply sat and thought, and +increased his apparent age. The truth was, he did not want to go home. +He was tired of going home. This was not because his home was not a +pleasant one. No single gentleman in the city had a handsomer or more +comfortable suite of rooms. It was not because he felt lonely, or +regretted that a wife and children did not brighten and enliven his +home. He was perfectly satisfied to be a bachelor. The conditions +suited him exactly. But, in spite of all this, he was tired of going +home. +</P> + +<P> +"I wish," said Mr. Tolman to himself, "that I could feel some interest +in going home." Then he rose and took a turn or two up and down the +room. But as that did not seem to give him any more interest in the +matter, he sat down again. "I wish it were necessary for me to go +home," said he, "but it isn't." So then he fell again to thinking. +"What I need," he said, after a while, "is to depend more upon +myself—to feel that I am necessary to myself. Just now I'm not. I'll +stop going home—at least, in this way. Where's the sense in envying +other men, when I can have all that they have just as well as not? And +I'll have it, too," said Mr. Tolman, as he went out and locked the +doors. Once in the streets, and walking rapidly, his ideas shaped +themselves easily and readily into a plan which, by the time he reached +the house of his head clerk, was quite matured. Mr. Canterfield was +just going down to dinner as his employer rang the bell, so he opened +the door himself. "I will detain you but a minute or two," said Mr. +Tolman, handing the keys to Mr. Canterfield. "Shall we step into the +parlor?" +</P> + +<P> +When his employer had gone, and Mr. Canterfield had joined his family +at the dinner-table, his wife immediately asked him what Mr. Tolman +wanted. +</P> + +<P> +"Only to say that he is going away to-morrow, and that I am to attend +to the business, and send his personal letters to ——," naming a city +not a hundred miles away. +</P> + +<P> +"How long is he going to stay?" +</P> + +<P> +"He didn't say," answered Mr. Canterfield. +</P> + +<P> +"I'll tell you what he ought to do," said the lady. "He ought to make +you a partner in the firm, and then he could go away and stay as long +as he pleased." +</P> + +<P> +"He can do that now," returned her husband. "He has made a good many +trips since I have been with him, and things have gone on very much in +the same way as when he is here. He knows that." +</P> + +<P> +"But still you'd like to be a partner?" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, yes," said Mr. Canterfield. +</P> + +<P> +"And common gratitude ought to prompt him to make you one," said his +wife. +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman went home and wrote a will. He left all his property, with +the exception of a few legacies, to the richest and most powerful +charitable organization in the country. +</P> + +<P> +"People will think I am crazy," said he to himself, "and if I should +die while I am carrying out my plan, I will leave the task of defending +my sanity to people who are able to make a good fight for me." And +before he went to bed his will was signed and witnessed. +</P> + +<P> +The next day he packed a trunk and left for the neighboring city. His +apartments were to be kept in readiness for his return at any time. If +you had seen him walking over to the railroad depot, you would have +taken him for a man of forty-five. +</P> + +<P> +When he arrived at his destination, Mr. Tolman established himself +temporarily at a hotel, and spent the next three or four days in +walking about the city looking for what he wanted. What he wanted was +rather difficult to define, but the way in which he put the matter to +himself was something like this: +</P> + +<P> +"I would like to find a snug little place where, I can live, and carry +on some business which I can attend to myself, and which will bring me +into contact with people of all sorts—people who will interest me. It +must be a small business, because I don't want to have to work very +hard, and it must be snug and comfortable, because I want to enjoy it. +I would like a shop of some sort, because that brings a man face to +face with his fellow-creatures." +</P> + +<P> +The city in which he was walking about was one of the best places in +the country in which to find the place of business he desired. It was +full of independent little shops. But Mr. Tolman could not readily +find one which resembled his ideal. A small dry-goods establishment +seemed to presuppose a female proprietor. A grocery store would give +him many interesting customers; but he did not know much about +groceries, and the business did not appear to him to possess any +aesthetic features. +</P> + +<P> +He was much pleased by a small shop belonging to a taxidermist. It was +exceedingly cosey, and the business was probably not so great as to +overwork any one. He might send the birds and beasts which were +brought to be stuffed to some practical operator, and have him put them +in proper condition for the customers. He might— But no. It would +be very unsatisfactory to engage in a business of which he knew +absolutely nothing. A taxidermist ought not to blush with ignorance +when asked some simple question about a little dead bird or a defunct +fish. And so he tore himself from the window of this fascinating +place, where, he fancied, had his education been differently managed, +he could in time have shown the world the spectacle of a cheerful and +unblighted Mr. Venus. +</P> + +<P> +The shop which at last appeared to suit him best was one which he had +passed and looked at several times before it struck him favorably. It +was in a small brick house in a side street, but not far from one of +the main business avenues of the city. The shop seemed devoted to +articles of stationery and small notions of various kinds not easy to +be classified. He had stopped to look at three penknives fastened to a +card, which was propped up in the little show-window, supported on one +side by a chess-board with "History of Asia" in gilt letters on the +back, and on the other by a small violin labelled "1 dollar." And as +he gazed past these articles into the interior of the shop, which was +now lighted up, it gradually dawned upon him that it was something like +his ideal of an attractive and interesting business place. At any +rate, he would go in and look at it. He did not care for a violin, +even at the low price marked on the one in the window, but a new +pocket-knife might be useful. So he walked in and asked to look at +pocket-knives. +</P> + +<P> +The shop was in charge of a very pleasant old lady of about sixty, who +sat sewing behind the little counter. While she went to the window and +very carefully reached over the articles displayed therein to get the +card of penknives, Mr. Tolman looked about him. The shop was quite +small, but there seemed to be a good deal in it. There were shelves +behind the counter, and there were shelves on the opposite wall, and +they all seemed well filled with something or other. In the corner +near the old lady's chair was a little coal stove with a bright fire in +it, and at the back of the shop, at the top of two steps, was a glass +door partly open, through which he saw a small room, with a red carpet +on the floor, and a little table apparently set for a meal. +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman looked at the knives when the old lady showed them to him, +and after a good deal of consideration he selected one which he thought +would be a good knife to give to a boy. Then he looked over some +things in the way of paper-cutters, whist-markers, and such small +matters, which were in a glass case on the counter. And while he +looked at them he talked to the old lady. +</P> + +<P> +She was a friendly, sociable body, very glad to have any one to talk +to, and so it was not at all difficult for Mr. Tolman, by some general +remarks, to draw from her a great many points about herself and her +shop. She was a widow, with a son who, from her remarks, must have +been forty years old. He was connected with a mercantile +establishment, and they had lived here for a long time. While her son +was a salesman, and came home every evening, this was very pleasant. +But after he became a commercial traveller, and was away from the city +for months at a time, she did not like it at all. It was very lonely +for her. +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman's heart rose within him, but he did not interrupt her. +</P> + +<P> +"If I could do it," said she, "I would give up this place, and go and +live with my sister in the country. It would be better for both of us, +and Henry could come there just as well as here when he gets back from +his trips." +</P> + +<P> +"Why don't you sell out?" asked Mr. Tolman, a little fearfully, for he +began to think that all this was too easy sailing to be entirely safe. +</P> + +<P> +"That would not be easy," said she, with a smile. "It might be a long +time before we could find any one who would want to take the place. We +have a fair trade in the store, but it isn't what it used to be when +times were better. And the library is falling off, too. Most of the +books are getting pretty old, and it don't pay to spend much money for +new ones now." +</P> + +<P> +"The library!" said Mr. Tolman. "Have you a library?" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, yes," replied the old lady. "I've had a circulating library here +for nearly fifteen years. There it is on those two upper shelves +behind you." +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman turned, and beheld two long rows of books in brown-paper +covers, with a short step-ladder, standing near the door of the inner +room, by which these shelves might be reached. This pleased him +greatly. He had had no idea that there was a library here. +</P> + +<P> +"I declare!" said he. "It must be very pleasant to manage a +circulating library—a small one like this, I mean. I shouldn't mind +going into a business of the kind myself." +</P> + +<P> +The old lady looked up, surprised. Did he wish to go into business? +She had not supposed that, just from looking at him. +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman explained his views to her. He did not tell what he had +been doing in the way of business, or what Mr. Canterfield was doing +for him now. He merely stated his present wishes, and acknowledged to +her that it was the attractiveness of her establishment that had led +him to come in. +</P> + +<P> +"Then you do not want the penknife?" she said quickly. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, yes, I do," said he. "And I really believe, if we can come to +terms, that I would like the two other knives, together with the rest +of your stock in trade." +</P> + +<P> +The old lady laughed a little nervously. She hoped very much indeed +that they could come to terms. She brought a chair from the back room, +and Mr. Tolman sat down with her by the stove to talk it over. Few +customers came in to interrupt them, and they talked the matter over +very thoroughly. They both came to the conclusion that there would be +no difficulty about terms, nor about Mr. Tolman's ability to carry on +the business after a very little instruction from the present +proprietress. When Mr. Tolman left, it was with the understanding that +he was to call again in a couple of days, when the son Henry would be +at home, and matters could be definitely arranged. +</P> + +<P> +When the three met, the bargain was soon struck. As each party was so +desirous of making it, few difficulties were interposed. The old lady, +indeed, was in favor of some delay in the transfer of the +establishment, as she would like to clean and dust every shelf and +corner and every article in the place. But Mr. Tolman was in a hurry +to take possession; and as the son Henry would have to start off on +another trip in a short time, he wanted to see his mother moved and +settled before he left. There was not much to move but trunks and +bandboxes, and some antiquated pieces of furniture of special value to +the old lady, for Mr. Tolman insisted on buying everything in the +house, just as it stood. The whole thing did not cost him, he said to +himself, as much as some of his acquaintances would pay for a horse. +The methodical son Henry took an account of stock, and Mr. Tolman took +several lessons from the old lady, in which she explained to him how to +find out the selling prices of the various articles from the marks on +the little tags attached to them. And she particularly instructed him +in the management of the circulating library. She informed him of the +character of the books, and, as far as possible, of the character of +the regular patrons. She told him whom he might trust to take out a +book without paying for the one brought in, if they didn't happen to +have the change with them, and she indicated with little crosses +opposite their names those persons who should be required to pay cash +down for what they had had, before receiving further benefits. +</P> + +<P> +It was astonishing to see what interest Mr. Tolman took in all this. +He was really anxious to meet some of the people about whom the old +lady discoursed. He tried, too, to remember a few of the many things +she told him of her methods of buying and selling, and the general +management of her shop; and he probably did not forget more than three +fourths of what she told him. +</P> + +<P> +Finally everything was settled to the satisfaction of the two male +parties to the bargain,—although the old lady thought of a hundred +things she would yet like to do,—and one fine frosty afternoon a +cart-load of furniture and baggage left the door, the old lady and her +son took leave of the old place, and Mr. Tolman was left sitting behind +the little counter, the sole manager and proprietor of a circulating +library and a stationery and notion shop. He laughed when he thought +of it, but he rubbed his hands and felt very well satisfied. +</P> + +<P> +"There is nothing really crazy about it," he said to himself. "If +there is a thing that I think I would like, and I can afford to have +it, and there's no harm in it, why not have it?" +</P> + +<P> +There was nobody there to say anything against this, so Mr. Tolman +rubbed his hands again before the fire, and rose to walk up and down +his shop, and wonder who would be his first customer. +</P> + +<P> +In the course of twenty minutes a little boy opened the door and came +in. Mr. Tolman hastened behind the counter to receive his commands. +The little boy wanted two sheets of note-paper and an envelope. +</P> + +<P> +"Any particular kind!" asked Mr. Tolman. +</P> + +<P> +The boy didn't know of any particular variety being desired. He +thought the same kind she always got would do. And he looked very hard +at Mr. Tolman, evidently wondering at the change in the shopkeeper, but +asking no questions. +</P> + +<P> +"You are a regular customer, I suppose," said Mr. Tolman, opening +several boxes of paper which he had taken down from the shelves. "I +have just begun business here, and don't know what kind of paper you +have been in the habit of buying. But I suppose this will do." And he +took out a couple of sheets of the best, with an envelope to match. +These he carefully tied up in a piece of thin brown paper, and gave to +the boy, who handed him three cents. Mr. Tolman took them, smiled, and +then, having made a rapid calculation, he called to the boy, who was +just opening the door, and gave him back one cent. +</P> + +<P> +"You have paid me too much," he said. +</P> + +<P> +The boy took the cent, looked at Mr. Tolman, and then got out of the +store as quickly as he could. +</P> + +<P> +"Such profits as that are enormous," said Mr. Tolman, "but I suppose +the small sales balance them." This Mr. Tolman subsequently found to +be the case. +</P> + +<P> +One or two other customers came in in the course of the afternoon, and +about dark the people who took out books began to arrive. These kept +Mr. Tolman very busy. He not only had to do a good deal of entering +and cancelling, but he had to answer a great many questions about the +change in proprietorship, and the probability of his getting in some +new books, with suggestions as to the quantity and character of these, +mingled with a few dissatisfied remarks in regard to the volumes +already on hand. +</P> + +<P> +Every one seemed sorry that the old lady had gone away. But Mr. Tolman +was so pleasant and anxious to please, and took such an interest in +their selection of books, that only one of the subscribers appeared to +take the change very much to heart. This was a young man who was +forty-three cents in arrears. He was a long time selecting a book, and +when at last he brought it to Mr. Tolman to be entered, he told him in +a low voice that he hoped there would be no objection to letting his +account run on for a little while longer. On the first of the month he +would settle it, and then he hoped to be able to pay cash whenever he +brought in a book. +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman looked for his name on the old lady's list, and, finding no +cross against it, told him that it was all right, and that the first of +the month would do very well. The young man went away perfectly +satisfied with the new librarian. Thus did Mr. Tolman begin to build +up his popularity. As the evening grew on he found himself becoming +very hungry. But he did not like to shut up the shop, for every now +and then some one dropped in, sometimes to ask what time it was, and +sometimes to make a little purchase, while there were still some +library patrons coming in at intervals. +</P> + +<P> +However, taking courage during a short rest from customers, he put up +the shutters, locked the door, and hurried off to a hotel, where he +partook of a meal such as few keepers of little shops ever think of +indulging in. +</P> + +<P> +The next morning Mr. Tolman got his own breakfast. This was +delightful. He had seen how cosily the old lady had spread her table +in the little back room, where there was a stove suitable for any +cooking he might wish to indulge in, and he longed for such a cosey +meal. There were plenty of stock provisions in the house, which he had +purchased with the rest of the goods, and he went out and bought +himself a fresh loaf of bread. Then he broiled a piece of ham, made +some good strong tea, boiled some eggs, and had a breakfast on the +little round table which, though plain enough, he enjoyed more than any +breakfast at his club which he could remember. He had opened the shop, +and sat facing the glass door, hoping, almost, that there would be some +interruption to his meal. It would seem so much more proper in that +sort of business if he had to get up and go attend to a customer. +</P> + +<P> +Before the evening of that day Mr. Tolman became convinced that he +would soon be obliged to employ a boy or some one to attend to the +establishment during his absence. After breakfast, a woman recommended +by the old lady came to make his bed and clean up generally, but when +she had gone he was left alone with his shop. He determined not to +allow this responsibility to injure his health, and so at one o'clock +boldly locked the shop door and went out to his lunch. He hoped that +no one would call during his absence, but when he returned he found a +little girl with a pitcher standing at the door. She came to borrow +half a pint of milk. +</P> + +<P> +"Milk!" exclaimed Mr. Tolman, in surprise. "Why, my child, I have no +milk. I don't even use it in my tea." +</P> + +<P> +The little girl looked very much disappointed. "Is Mrs. Walker gone +away for good?" said she. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," replied Mr. Tolman. "But I would be just as willing to lend you +the milk as she would be, if I had any. Is there any place near here +where you can buy milk?" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, yes," said the girl. "You can get it round in the market-house." +</P> + +<P> +"How much would half a pint cost?" he asked. +</P> + +<P> +"Three cents," replied the girl. +</P> + +<P> +"Well, then," said Mr. Tolman, "here are three cents. You can go and +buy the milk for me, and then you can borrow it. Will that suit?" +</P> + +<P> +The girl thought it would suit very well, and away she went. +</P> + +<P> +Even this little incident pleased Mr. Tolman. It was so very novel. +When he came back from his dinner in the evening, he found two +circulating library subscribers stamping their feet on the door-step, +and he afterwards heard that several others had called and gone away. +It would certainly injure the library if he suspended business at +meal-times. He could easily have his choice of a hundred boys if he +chose to advertise for one, but he shrank from having a youngster in +the place. It would interfere greatly with his cosiness and his +experiences. He might possibly find a boy who went to school, and who +would be willing to come at noon and in the evening if he were paid +enough. But it would have to be a very steady and responsible boy. He +would think it over before taking any steps. +</P> + +<P> +He thought it over for a day or two, but he did not spend his whole +time in doing so. When he had no customers, he sauntered about in the +little parlor over the shop, with its odd old furniture, its quaint +prints on the walls, and its absurd ornaments on the mantelpiece. The +other little rooms seemed almost as funny to him, and he was sorry when +the bell on the shop door called him down from their contemplation. It +was pleasant to him to think that he owned all these odd things. The +ownership of the varied goods in the shop also gave him an agreeable +feeling which none of his other possessions had ever afforded him. It +was all so odd and novel. +</P> + +<P> +He liked much to look over the books in the library. Many of them were +old novels, the names of which were familiar enough to him, but which +he had never read. He determined to read some of them as soon as he +felt fixed and settled. +</P> + +<P> +In looking over the book in which the names and accounts of the +subscribers were entered, he amused himself by wondering what sort of +persons they were who had out certain books. Who, for instance, wanted +to read "The Book of Cats," and who could possibly care for "The +Mysteries of Udolpho"? But the unknown person in regard to whom Mr. +Tolman felt the greatest curiosity was the subscriber who now had in +his possession a volume entitled "Dormstock's Logarithms of the +Diapason." +</P> + +<P> +"How on earth," exclaimed Mr. Tolman, "did such a book get into this +library? And where on earth did the person spring from who would want +to take it out? And not only want to take it," he continued, as he +examined the entry regarding the volume, "but come and have it renewed +one, two, three, four—nine times! He has had that book for eighteen +weeks!" +</P> + +<P> +Without exactly making up his mind to do so, Mr. Tolman deferred taking +steps toward getting an assistant until P. Glascow, the person in +question, should make an appearance, and it was nearly time for the +book to be brought in again. +</P> + +<P> +"If I get a boy now," thought Mr. Tolman, "Glascow will be sure to come +and bring the book while I am out." +</P> + +<P> +In almost exactly two weeks from the date of the last renewal of the +book, P. Glascow came in. It was the middle of the afternoon, and Mr. +Tolman was alone. This investigator of musical philosophy was a quiet +young man of about thirty, wearing a light-brown cloak, and carrying +under one arm a large book. +</P> + +<P> +P. Glascow was surprised when he heard of the change in the +proprietorship of the library. Still, he hoped that there would be no +objection to his renewing the book which he had with him, and which he +had taken out some time ago. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, no," said Mr. Tolman, "none in the world. In fact, I don't +suppose there are any other subscribers who would want it. I have had +the curiosity to look to see if it had ever been taken out before, and +I find it has not." +</P> + +<P> +The young man smiled quietly. "No," said he, "I suppose not. It is +not every one who would care to study the higher mathematics of music, +especially when treated as Dormstock treats the subject." +</P> + +<P> +"He seems to go into it pretty deeply," remarked Mr. Tolman, who had +taken up the book. "At least, I should think so, judging from all +these calculations, and problems, and squares, and cubes." +</P> + +<P> +"Indeed he does," said Glascow. "And although I have had the book some +months, and have more reading time at my disposal than most persons, I +have only reached the fifty-sixth page, and doubt if I shall not have +to review some of that before I can feel that I thoroughly understand +it." +</P> + +<P> +"And there are three hundred and forty pages in all!" said Mr. Tolman, +compassionately. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," replied the other. "But I am quite sure that the matter will +grow easier as I proceed. I have found that out from what I have +already done." +</P> + +<P> +"You say you have a good deal of leisure?" remarked Mr. Tolman. "Is +the musical business dull at present?" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, I'm not in the musical business," said Glascow. "I have a great +love for music, and wish to thoroughly understand it. But my business +is quite different. I am a night druggist, and that is the reason I +have so much leisure for reading." +</P> + +<P> +"A night druggist?" repeated Mr. Tolman, inquiringly. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes, sir," said the other. "I am in a large downtown drug store which +is kept open all night, and I go on duty after the day clerks leave." +</P> + +<P> +"And does that give you more leisure?" asked Mr. Tolman. +</P> + +<P> +"It seems to," answered Glascow. "I sleep until about noon, and then I +have the rest of the day, until seven o'clock, to myself. I think that +people who work at night can make a more satisfactory use of their own +time than those who work in the daytime. In the summer I can take a +trip on the river, or go somewhere out of town, every day, if I like." +</P> + +<P> +"Daylight is more available for many things, that is true," said Mr. +Tolman. "But is it not dreadfully lonely sitting in a drug store all +night? There can't be many people to come to buy medicine at night. I +thought there was generally a night-bell to drug stores, by which a +clerk could be awakened if anybody wanted anything." +</P> + +<P> +"It's not very lonely in our store at night," said Glascow. "In fact, +it's often more lively then than in the daytime. You see, we are right +down among the newspaper offices, and there's always somebody coming in +for soda-water, or cigars, or something or other. The store is a +bright, warm place for the night editors and reporters to meet together +and talk and drink hot soda, and there's always a knot of 'em around +the stove about the time the papers begin to go to press. And they're +a lively set, I can tell you, sir. I've heard some of the best stories +I ever heard in my life told in our place after three o'clock in the +morning." +</P> + +<P> +"A strange life!" said Mr. Tolman. "Do you know, I never thought that +people amused themselves in that way—and night after night, I suppose." +</P> + +<P> +"Yes, sir, night after night, Sundays and all." +</P> + +<P> +The night druggist now took up his book. +</P> + +<P> +"Going home to read?" asked Mr. Tolman. +</P> + +<P> +"Well, no," said the other. "It's rather cold this afternoon to read. +I think I'll take a brisk walk." +</P> + +<P> +"Can't you leave your book until you return!" asked Mr. Tolman. "That +is, if you will come back this way. It's an awkward book to carry +about." +</P> + +<P> +"Thank you, I will," said Glascow. "I shall come back this way." +</P> + +<P> +When he had gone, Mr. Tolman took up the book, and began to look over +it more carefully than he had done before. But his examination did not +last long. +</P> + +<P> +"How anybody of common sense can take any interest in this stuff is +beyond my comprehension," said Mr. Tolman, as he closed the book and +put it on a little shelf behind the counter. +</P> + +<P> +When Glascow came back, Mr. Tolman asked him to stay and warm himself. +And then, after they had talked for a short time, Mr. Tolman began to +feel hungry. He had his winter appetite, and had lunched early. So +said he to the night druggist, who had opened his "Dormstock," "How +would you like to sit here and read awhile, while I go and get my +dinner? I will light the gas, and you can be very comfortable here, if +you are not in a hurry." +</P> + +<P> +P. Glascow was in no hurry at all, and was very glad to have some quiet +reading by a warm fire; and so Mr. Tolman left him, feeling perfectly +confident that a man who had been allowed by the old lady to renew a +book nine times must be perfectly trustworthy. +</P> + +<P> +When Mr. Tolman returned, the two had some further conversation in the +corner by the little stove. +</P> + +<P> +"It must be rather annoying," said the night druggist, "not to be able +to go out to your meals without shutting up your shop. If you like," +said he, rather hesitatingly, "I will stop in about this time in the +afternoon, and stay here while you go to dinner. I'll be glad to do +this until you get an assistant. I can easily attend to most people +who come in, and others can wait." +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman jumped at this proposition. It was exactly what he wanted. +</P> + +<P> +So P. Glascow came every afternoon and read "Dormstock" while Mr. +Tolman went to dinner; and before long he came at lunch-time also. It +was just as convenient as not, he said. He had finished his breakfast, +and would like to read awhile. Mr. Tolman fancied that the night +druggist's lodgings were, perhaps, not very well warmed, which idea +explained the desire to walk rather than read on a cold afternoon. +Glascow's name was entered on the free list, and he always took away +the "Dormstock" at night, because he might have a chance of looking +into it at the store, when custom began to grow slack in the latter +part of the early morning. +</P> + +<P> +One afternoon there came into the shop a young lady, who brought back +two books which she had had for more than a month. She made no excuses +for keeping the books longer than the prescribed time, but simply +handed them in and paid her fine. Mr. Tolman did not like to take this +money, for it was the first of the kind he had received; but the young +lady looked as if she were well able to afford the luxury of keeping +books over their time, and business was business. So he gravely gave +her her change. Then she said she would like to take out "Dormstock's +Logarithms of the Diapason." +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman stared at her. She was a bright, handsome young lady, and +looked as if she had very good sense. He could not understand it. But +he told her the book was out. +</P> + +<P> +"Out!" she said. "Why, it's always out. It seems strange to me that +there should be such a demand for that book. I have been trying to get +it for ever so long." +</P> + +<P> +"It IS strange," said Mr. Tolman, "but it is certainly in demand. Did +Mrs. Walker ever make you any promises about it?" +</P> + +<P> +"No," said she, "but I thought my turn would come around some time. +And I particularly want the book just now." +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman felt somewhat troubled. He knew that the night druggist +ought not to monopolize the volume, and yet he did not wish to +disoblige one who was so useful to him, and who took such an earnest +interest in the book. And he could not temporize with the young lady, +and say that he thought the book would soon be in. He knew it would +not. There were three hundred and forty pages of it. So he merely +remarked that he was sorry. +</P> + +<P> +"So am I," said the young lady, "very sorry. It so happens that just +now I have a peculiar opportunity for studying that book which may not +occur again." +</P> + +<P> +There was something in Mr. Tolman's sympathetic face which seemed to +invite her confidence, and she continued. +</P> + +<P> +"I am a teacher," she said, "and on account of certain circumstances I +have a holiday for a month, which I intended to give up almost entirely +to the study of music, and I particularly wanted "Dormstock." Do you +think there is any chance of its early return, and will you reserve it +for me?" +</P> + +<P> +"Reserve it!" said Mr. Tolman. "Most certainly I will." And then he +reflected a second or two. "If you will come here the day after +to-morrow, I will be able to tell you something definite." +</P> + +<P> +She said she would come. +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman was out a long time at lunch-time the next day. He went to +all the leading book-stores to see if he could buy a copy of +Dormstock's great work. But he was unsuccessful. The booksellers told +him that there was no probability that he could get a copy in the +country, unless, indeed, he found it in the stock of some second-hand +dealer, and that even if he sent to England for it, where it was +published, it was not likely he could get it, for it had been long out +of print. There was no demand at all for it. The next day he went to +several second-hand stores, but no "Dormstock" could he find. +</P> + +<P> +When he came back he spoke to Glascow on the subject. He was sorry to +do so, but thought that simple justice compelled him to mention the +matter. The night druggist was thrown into a perturbed state of mind +by the information that some one wanted his beloved book. +</P> + +<P> +"A woman!" he exclaimed. "Why, she would not understand two pages out +of the whole of it. It is too bad. I didn't suppose any one would +want this book." +</P> + +<P> +"Do not disturb yourself too much," said Mr. Tolman. "I am not sure +that you ought to give it up." +</P> + +<P> +"I am very glad to hear you say so," said Glascow. "I have no doubt it +is only a passing fancy with her. I dare say she would really rather +have a good new novel." And then, having heard that the lady was +expected that afternoon, he went out to walk, with the "Dormstock" +under his arm. +</P> + +<P> +When the young lady arrived, an hour or so later, she was not at all +satisfied to take out a new novel, and was very sorry indeed not to +find the "Logarithms of the Diapason" waiting for her. Mr. Tolman told +her that he had tried to buy another copy of the work, and for this she +expressed herself gratefully. He also found himself compelled to say +that the book was in the possession of a gentleman who had had it for +some time—all the time it had been out, in fact—and had not yet +finished it. +</P> + +<P> +At this the young lady seemed somewhat nettled. +</P> + +<P> +"Is it not against the rules for any person to keep one book out so +long?" she asked. +</P> + +<P> +"No," said Mr. Tolman. "I have looked into that. Our rules are very +simple, and merely say that a book may be renewed by the payment of a +certain sum." +</P> + +<P> +"Then I am never to have it?" remarked the young lady. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, I wouldn't despair about it," said Mr. Tolman. "He has not had +time to reflect upon the matter. He is a reasonable young man, and I +believe that he will be willing to give up his study of the book for a +time and let you take it." +</P> + +<P> +"No," said she, "I don't wish that. If he is studying, as you say he +is, day and night, I do not wish to interrupt him. I should want the +book at least a month, and that, I suppose, would upset his course of +study entirely. But I do not think any one should begin in a +circulating library to study a book that will take him a year to +finish; for, from what you say, it will take this gentleman at least +that time to finish Dormstock's book." So she went her way. +</P> + +<P> +When P. Glascow heard all this in the evening, he was very grave. He +had evidently been reflecting. +</P> + +<P> +"It is not fair," said he. "I ought not to keep the book so long. I +now give it up for a while. You may let her have it when she comes." +And he put the "Dormstock" on the counter, and went and sat down by the +stove. +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman was grieved. He knew the night druggist had done right, but +still he was sorry for him. "What will you do?" he asked. "Will you +stop your studies?" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, no," said Glascow, gazing solemnly into the stove. "I will take +up some other books on the diapason which I have, and so will keep my +ideas fresh on the subject until this lady is done with the book. I do +not really believe she will study it very long." Then he added: "If +it is all the same to you, I will come around here and read, as I have +been doing, until you shall get a regular assistant." +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman would be delighted to have him come, he said. He had +entirely given up the idea of getting an assistant, but this he did not +say. +</P> + +<P> +It was some time before the lady came back, and Mr. Tolman was afraid +she was not coming at all. But she did come, and asked for Mrs. +Burney's "Evelina." She smiled when she named the book, and said that +she believed she would have to take a novel, after all, and she had +always wanted to read that one. +</P> + +<P> +"I wouldn't take a novel if I were you," said Mr. Tolman; and he +triumphantly took down the "Dormstock" and laid it before her. +</P> + +<P> +She was evidently much pleased, but when he told her of Mr. Glascow's +gentlemanly conduct in the matter, her countenance instantly changed. +</P> + +<P> +"Not at all," said she, laying down the book. "I will not break up his +study. I will take the `Evelina' if you please." +</P> + +<P> +And as no persuasion from Mr. Tolman had any effect upon her, she went +away with Mrs. Burney's novel in her muff. +</P> + +<P> +"Now, then," said Mr. Tolman to Glascow, in the evening, "you may as +well take the book along with you. She won't have it." +</P> + +<P> +But Glascow would do nothing of the kind. "No," he remarked, as he sat +looking into the stove. "When I said I would let her have it, I meant +it. She'll take it when she sees that it continues to remain in the +library." +</P> + +<P> +Glascow was mistaken: she did not take it, having the idea that he +would soon conclude that it would be wiser for him to read it than to +let it stand idly on the shelf. +</P> + +<P> +"It would serve them both right," said Mr. Tolman to himself, "if +somebody else should come and take it." But there was no one else +among his subscribers who would even think of such a thing. +</P> + +<P> +One day, however, the young lady came in and asked to look at the book. +"Don't think that I am going to take it out," she said, noticing Mr. +Tolman's look of pleasure as he handed her the volume. "I only wish to +see what he says on a certain subject which I am studying now." And so +she sat down by the stove on the chair which Mr. Tolman placed for her, +and opened "Dormstock." +</P> + +<P> +She sat earnestly poring over the book for half an hour or more, and +then she looked up and said: "I really cannot make out what this part +means. Excuse my troubling you, but I would be very glad if you would +explain the latter part of this passage." +</P> + +<P> +"Me!" exclaimed Mr. Tolman. "Why, my good madam,—miss, I mean,—I +couldn't explain it to you if it were to save my life. But what page +is it?" said he, looking at his watch. +</P> + +<P> +"Page twenty-four," answered the young lady. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, well, then," said he, "if you can wait ten or fifteen minutes, the +gentleman who has had the book will be here, and I think he can explain +anything in the first part of the work." +</P> + +<P> +The young lady seemed to hesitate whether to wait or not; but as she +had a certain curiosity to see what sort of a person he was who had +been so absorbed in the book, she concluded to sit a little longer and +look into some other parts of the volume. +</P> + +<P> +The night druggist soon came in, and when Mr. Tolman introduced him to +the lady, he readily agreed to explain the passage to her if he could. +So Mr. Tolman got him a chair from the inner room, and he also sat down +by the stove. +</P> + +<P> +The explanation was difficult, but it was achieved at last, and then +the young lady broached the subject of leaving the book unused. This +was discussed for some time, but came to nothing, although Mr. Tolman +put down his afternoon paper and joined in the argument, urging, among +other points, that as the matter now stood he was deprived by the +dead-lock of all income from the book. But even this strong argument +proved of no avail. +</P> + +<P> +"Then I will tell you what I wish you would do," said Mr. Tolman, as +the young lady rose to go: "come here and look at the book whenever you +wish to do so. I would like to make this more of a reading-room, +anyway. It would give me more company." +</P> + +<P> +After this the young lady looked into "Dormstock" when she came in; and +as her holidays had been extended by the continued absence of the +family in which she taught, she had plenty of time for study, and came +quite frequently. She often met Glascow in the shop, and on such +occasions they generally consulted "Dormstock," and sometimes had quite +lengthy talks on musical matters. One afternoon they came in together, +having met on their way to the library, and entered into a conversation +on diapasonic logarithms, which continued during the lady's stay in the +shop. +</P> + +<P> +"The proper thing," thought Mr. Tolman, "would be for these two people +to get married. Then they could take the book and study it to their +heart's content. And they would certainly suit each other, for they +are both greatly attached to musical mathematics and philosophy, and +neither of them either plays or sings, as they have told me. It would +be an admirable match." +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman thought over this matter a good deal, and at last determined +to mention it to Glascow. When he did so, the young man colored, and +expressed the opinion that it would be of no use to think of such a +thing. But it was evident from his manner and subsequent discourse +that he had thought of it. +</P> + +<P> +Mr. Tolman gradually became quite anxious on the subject, especially as +the night druggist did not seem inclined to take any steps in the +matter. The weather was now beginning to be warmer, and Mr. Tolman +reflected that the little house and the little shop were probably much +more cosey and comfortable in winter than in summer. There were higher +buildings all about the house, and even now he began to feel that the +circulation of air would be quite as agreeable as the circulation of +books. He thought a good deal about his airy rooms in the neighboring +city. +</P> + +<P> +"Mr. Glascow," said he, one afternoon, "I have made up my mind to sell +out this business shortly." +</P> + +<P> +"What!" exclaimed the other. "Do you mean you will give it up and go +away—leave the place altogether?" +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," replied Mr. Tolman, "I shall give up the place entirely, and +leave the city." +</P> + +<P> +The night druggist was shocked. He had spent many happy hours in that +shop, and his hours there were now becoming pleasanter than ever. If +Mr. Tolman went away, all this must end. Nothing of the kind could be +expected of any new proprietor. +</P> + +<P> +"And considering this," continued Mr. Tolman, "I think it would be well +for you to bring your love matters to a conclusion while I am here to +help you." +</P> + +<P> +"My love matters!" exclaimed Mr. Glascow, with a flush. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes, certainly," said Mr. Tolman. "I have eyes, and I know all about +it. Now let me tell you what I think. When a thing is to be done, it +ought to be done the first time there is a good chance. That's the way +I do business. Now you might as well come around here to-morrow +afternoon prepared to propose to Miss Edwards. She is due to-morrow, +for she has been two days away. If she doesn't come, we will postpone +the matter until the next day. But you should be ready to-morrow. I +don't believe you can see her much when you don't meet her here, for +that family is expected back very soon, and from what I infer from her +account of her employers, you won't care to visit her at their house." +</P> + +<P> +The night druggist wanted to think about it. +</P> + +<P> +"There is nothing to think," said Mr. Tolman. "We know all about the +lady." (He spoke truly, for he had informed himself about both parties +to the affair.) "Take my advice, and be here to-morrow afternoon—and +come rather early." +</P> + +<P> +The next morning Mr. Tolman went up to his parlor on the second floor, +and brought down two blue stuffed chairs, the best he had, and put them +in the little room back of the shop. He also brought down one or two +knickknacks and put them on the mantelpiece, and he dusted and +brightened up the room as well as he could. He even covered the table +with a red cloth from the parlor. +</P> + +<P> +When the young lady arrived, he invited her to walk into the back room +to look over some new books he had just got in. If she had known he +proposed to give up the business, she would have thought it rather +strange that he should be buying new books. But she knew nothing of +his intentions. When she was seated at the table whereon the new books +were spread, Mr. Tolman stepped outside of the shop door to watch for +Glascow's approach. He soon appeared. +</P> + +<P> +"Walk right in," said Mr. Tolman. "She's in the back room looking over +books. I'll wait here, and keep out customers as far as possible. +It's pleasant, and I want a little fresh air. I'll give you twenty +minutes." +</P> + +<P> +Glascow was pale, but he went in without a word, and Mr. Tolman, with +his hands under his coat-tail, and his feet rather far apart, +established a blockade on the doorstep. He stood there for some time, +looking at the people outside, and wondering what the people inside +were doing. The little girl who had borrowed the milk of him, and who +had never returned it, was about to pass the door; but seeing him +standing there, she crossed over to the other side of the street. But +he did not notice her. He was wondering if it was time to go in. A +boy came up to the door, and wanted to know if he kept Easter eggs. +Mr. Tolman was happy to say he did not. When he had allowed the night +druggist a very liberal twenty minutes, he went in. As he entered the +shop door, giving the bell a very decided ring as he did so, P. Glascow +came down the two steps that led from the inner room. His face showed +that it was all right with him. +</P> + +<P> +A few days after this Mr. Tolman sold out his stock, good will, and +fixtures, together with the furniture and lease of the house. And who +should he sell out to but to Mr. Glascow! This piece of business was +one of the happiest points in the whole affair. There was no reason +why the happy couple should not be married very soon, and the young +lady was charmed to give up her position as teacher and governess in a +family, and come and take charge of that delightful little store and +that cunning little house, with almost everything in it that they +wanted. +</P> + +<P> +One thing in the establishment Mr. Tolman refused to sell. That was +Dormstock's great work. He made the couple a present of the volume, +and between two of the earlier pages he placed a bank-note which in +value was very much more than that of the ordinary wedding gift. +</P> + +<P> +"What are YOU going to do?" they asked of him, when all these things +were settled. And then he told them how he was going back to his +business in the neighboring city, and he told them what it was, and how +he had come to manage a circulating library. They did not think him +crazy. People who studied the logarithms of the diapason would not be +apt to think a man crazy for such a little thing as that. +</P> + +<P> +When Mr. Tolman returned to the establishment of Pusey & Co., he found +everything going on very satisfactorily. +</P> + +<P> +"You look ten years younger, sir," said Mr. Canterfield. "You must +have had a very pleasant time. I did not think there was enough to +interest you in —— for so long a time." +</P> + +<P> +"Interest me!" exclaimed Mr. Tolman. "Why, objects of interest crowded +on me. I never had a more enjoyable holiday in my life." +</P> + +<P> +When he went home that evening (and he found himself quite willing to +go), he tore up the will he had made. He now felt that there was no +necessity for proving his sanity. +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<A NAME="chap11"></A> +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +MY UNWILLING NEIGHBOR +</H3> + +<P> +I was about twenty-five years old when I began life as the owner of a +vineyard in western Virginia. I bought a large tract of land, the +greater part of which lay upon the sloping side of one of the +foot-hills of the Blue Ridge, the exposure being that most favorable to +the growth of the vine. I am an enthusiastic lover of the country and +of country life, and believed that I should derive more pleasure as +well as profit from the culture of my far-stretching vineyard than I +would from ordinary farm operations. +</P> + +<P> +I built myself a good house of moderate size upon a little plateau on +the higher part of my estate. Sitting in my porch, smoking my pipe +after the labors of the day, I could look down over my vineyard into a +beautiful valley, with here and there a little curling smoke arising +from some of the few dwellings which were scattered about among the +groves and spreading fields, and above this beauty I could imagine all +my hillside clothed in green and purple. +</P> + +<P> +My family consisted of myself alone. It is true that I expected some +day that there would be others in my house besides myself, but I was +not ready for this yet. +</P> + +<P> +During the summer I found it very pleasant to live by myself. It was a +novelty, and I could arrange and manage everything in my own fashion, +which was a pleasure I had not enjoyed when I lived in my father's +house. But when winter came I found it very lonely. Even my servants +lived in a cabin at some little distance, and there were many dark and +stormy evenings when the company even of a bore would have been welcome +to me. Sometimes I walked over to the town and visited my friends +there, but this was not feasible on stormy nights, and the winter +seemed to me a very long one. +</P> + +<P> +But spring came, outdoor operations began, and for a few weeks I felt +again that I was all-sufficient for my own pleasure and comfort. Then +came a change. One of those seasons of bad and stormy weather which so +frequently follow an early spring settled down upon my spirits and my +hillside. It rained, it was cold, fierce winds blew, and I became more +anxious for somebody to talk to than I had been at any time during the +winter. +</P> + +<P> +One night, when a very bad storm was raging, I went to bed early, and +as I lay awake I revolved in my mind a scheme of which I had frequently +thought before. I would build a neat little house on my grounds, not +very far away from my house, but not too near, and I would ask Jack +Brandiger to come there and live. Jack was a friend of mine who was +reading law in the town, and it seemed to me that it would be much more +pleasant, and even more profitable, to read law on a pretty hillside +overlooking a charming valley, with woods and mountains behind and +above him, where he could ramble to his heart's content. +</P> + +<P> +I had thought of asking Jack to come and live with me, but this idea I +soon dismissed. I am a very particular person, and Jack was not. He +left his pipes about in all sorts of places—sometimes when they were +still lighted. When he came to see me he was quite as likely to put +his hat over the inkstand as to put it anywhere else. But if Jack +lived at a little distance, and we could go backward and forward to see +each other whenever we pleased, that would be quite another thing. He +could do as he pleased in his own house, and I could do as I pleased in +mine, and we might have many pleasant evenings together. This was a +cheering idea, and I was planning how we might arrange with the negro +woman who managed my household affairs to attend also to those of Jack +when I fell asleep. +</P> + +<P> +I did not sleep long before I was awakened by the increased violence of +the storm. My house shook with the fury of the wind. +</P> + +<P> +The rain seemed to be pouring on its roof and northern side as if there +were a waterfall above us, and every now and then I could hear a shower +of hailstones rattling against the shutters. My bedroom was one of the +rooms on the lower floor, and even there I could hear the pounding of +the deluge and the hailstones upon the roof. +</P> + +<P> +All this was very doleful, and had a tendency to depress the spirits of +a man awake and alone in a good-sized house. But I shook off this +depression. It was, not agreeable to be up here by myself in such a +terrible storm, but there was nothing to be afraid of, as my house was +new and very strongly built, being constructed of logs, weather-boarded +outside and ceiled within. It would require a hurricane to blow off +the roof, and I believed my shutters to be hail-proof. So, as there +was no reason to stay awake, I turned over and went to sleep. +</P> + +<P> +I do not know how long it was before I was awakened again, this time +not by the noise of the storm, but by a curious movement of my +bedstead. I had once felt the slight shock of an earthquake, and it +seemed to me that this must be something of the kind. Certainly my bed +moved under me. I sat up. The room was pitchy dark. In a moment I +felt another movement, but this time it did not seem to me to resemble +an earthquake shock. Such motion, I think, is generally in horizontal +directions, while that which I felt was more like the movement of a +ship upon the water. The storm was at its height; the wind raged and +roared, and the rain seemed to be pouring down as heavily as ever. +</P> + +<P> +I was about to get up and light the lamp, for even the faintest +candle-flame would be some sort of company at such a grewsome moment, +when my bedstead gave another movement, more shiplike than before. It +actually lurched forward as if it were descending into the trough of +the sea, but, unlike a ship, it did not rise again, but remained in +such a slanting position that I began to slide down toward the foot. I +believe that if it had not been a bedstead provided with a footboard, I +should have slipped out upon the floor. +</P> + +<P> +I did not jump out of bed. I did not do anything. I was trying to +think, to understand the situation, to find out whether I was asleep or +awake, when I became aware of noises in the room and all over the house +which even through the din of the storm made themselves noticed by +their peculiarity. Tables, everything in the room, seemed to be +grating and grinding on the floor, and in a moment there was a crash. +I knew what that meant; my lamp had slipped off the table. Any doubt +on that point would have been dispelled by the smell of kerosene which +soon filled the air of the room. +</P> + +<P> +The motion of the bed, which I now believe must have been the motion of +the whole house, still continued; but the grating noises in the room +gradually ceased, from which I inferred that the furniture had brought +up against the front wall of the room. +</P> + +<P> +It now was impossible for me to get up and strike a light, for to do so +with kerosene oil all over the floor and its vapor diffused through the +room would probably result in setting the house on fire. So I must +stay in darkness and wait. I do not think I was very much +frightened—I was so astonished that there was no room in my mind for +fear. In fact, all my mental energies were occupied in trying to find +out what had happened. It required, however, only a few more minutes +of reflection, and a few more minutes of the grating, bumping, +trembling of my house, to enable me to make up my mind what was +happening. My house was sliding downhill! +</P> + +<P> +The wind must have blown the building from its foundations, and upon +the slippery surface of the hillside, probably lashed into liquid mud +by the pouring rain, it was making its way down toward the valley! In +a flash my mind's eye ran over the whole surface of the country beneath +me as far as I knew it. I was almost positive that there was no +precipice, no terrible chasm into which my house might fall. There was +nothing but sloping hillside, and beneath that a wide stretch of fields. +</P> + +<P> +Now there was a new and sudden noise of heavy objects falling upon the +roof, and I knew what that meant: my chimney had been wrenched from its +foundations, and the upper part of it had now toppled over. I could +hear, through the storm, the bricks banging and sliding upon the +slanting roof. Continuous sounds of cracking and snapping came to me +through the closed front windows, and these were caused, I supposed, by +the destruction of the stakes of my vines as the heavy house moved over +them. +</P> + +<P> +Of course, when I thoroughly understood the state of the case, my first +impulse was to spring out of bed, and, as quickly as possible, to get +out of that thumping and sliding house. But I restrained myself. The +floor might be covered with broken glass, I might not be able to find +my clothes in the darkness and in the jumble of furniture at the end of +the room, and even if I could dress myself, it would be folly to jump +out in the midst of that raging storm into a probable mass of wreckage +which I could not see. It would be far better to remain dry and warm +under my roof. There was no reason whatever to suppose that the house +would go to pieces, or that it would turn over. It must stop some time +or other, and, until it did so, I would be safer in my bed than +anywhere else. Therefore in my bed I stayed. +</P> + +<P> +Sitting upright, with my feet pressed against the footboard, I listened +and felt. The noises of the storm, and the cracking and the snapping +and grinding before me and under me, still continued, although I +sometimes thought that the wind was moderating a little, and that the +strange motion was becoming more regular. I believed the house was +moving faster than when it first began its strange career, but that it +was sliding over a smooth surface. Now I noticed a succession of loud +cracks and snaps at the front of the house, and, from the character of +the sounds, I concluded that my little front porch, which had been +acting as a cutwater at the bow of my shiplike house, had yielded at +last to the rough contact with the ground, and would probably soon be +torn away. This did not disturb me, for the house must still be firm. +</P> + +<P> +It was not long before I perceived that the slanting of my bed was +becoming less and less, and also I was quite sure that the house was +moving more slowly. Then the crackings and snappings before my front +wall ceased altogether. The bed resumed its ordinary horizontal +position, and although I did not know at what moment the house had +ceased sliding and had come to a standstill, I was sure that it had +done so. It was now resting upon a level surface. The room was still +perfectly dark, and the storm continued. It was useless for me to get +up until daylight came,—I could not see what had happened,—so I lay +back upon my pillow and tried to imagine upon what level portion of my +farm I had stranded. While doing this I fell asleep. +</P> + +<P> +When I woke, a little light was stealing into the room through the +blinds of my shutters. I quickly slipped out of bed, opened a window, +and looked out. Day was just breaking, the rain and wind had ceased, +and I could discern objects. But it seemed as if I needed some light +in my brain to enable me to comprehend what I saw. My eyes fell upon +nothing familiar. +</P> + +<P> +I did not stop to investigate, however, from my window. I found my +clothes huddled together with the furniture at the front end of the +room, and as soon as I was dressed I went into the hall and then to my +front door. I quickly jerked this open and was about to step outside +when, suddenly, I stopped. I was positive that my front porch had been +destroyed. But there I saw a porch a little lower than mine and a +great deal wider, and on the other side of it, not more than eight feet +from me, was a window—the window of a house, and on the other side of +the window was a face—the face of a young girl! As I stood staring in +blank amazement at the house which presented itself at my front door, +the face at the window disappeared, and I was left to contemplate the +scene by myself. I ran to my back door and threw it open. There I +saw, stretching up the fields and far up the hillside, the wide path +which my house had made as it came down from its elevated position to +the valley beneath, where it had ended its onward career by stopping up +against another house. As I looked from the back porch I saw that the +ground still continued to slope, so that if my house had not found in +its path another building, it would probably have proceeded somewhat +farther on its course. It was lighter, and I saw bushes and fences and +outbuildings—I was in a back yard. +</P> + +<P> +Almost breathless with amazement and consternation, I ran again to the +front door. When I reached it I found a young woman standing on the +porch of the house before me. I was about to say something—I know not +what—when she put her finger on her lips and stepped forward. +</P> + +<P> +"Please don't speak loudly," she said. "I am afraid it will frighten +mother. She is asleep yet. I suppose you and your house have been +sliding downhill?" +</P> + +<P> +"That is what has happened," said I. "But I cannot understand it. It +seems to me the most amazing thing that ever took place on the face of +the earth." +</P> + +<P> +"It is very queer," said she, "but hurricanes do blow away houses, and +that must have been a hurricane we had last night, for the wind was +strong enough to loosen any house. I have often wondered if that house +would ever slide downhill." +</P> + +<P> +"My house?" +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," she said. "Soon after it was built I began to think what a nice +clean sweep it could make from the place where it seemed to be stuck to +the side of the mountain, right down here into the valley." +</P> + +<P> +I could not talk with a girl like this; at least, I could not meet her +on her own conversational grounds. I was so agitated myself that it +seemed unnatural that any one to whom I should speak should not also be +agitated. +</P> + +<P> +"Who are you?" I asked rather brusquely. "At least, to whom does this +house belong?" +</P> + +<P> +"This is my mother's house," said she. "My mother is Mrs. Carson. We +happen just now to be living here by ourselves, so I cannot call on any +man to help you do anything. My brother has always lived with us, but +last week he went away." +</P> + +<P> +"You don't seem to be a bit astonished at what has happened," said I. +</P> + +<P> +She was rather a pretty girl, of a cheerful disposition, I should say, +for several times she had smiled as she spoke. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, I am astonished," she answered; "or, at least, I was. But I have +had time enough to get over some of it. It was at least an hour ago +when I was awakened by hearing something crack in the yard. I went to +a window and looked out, and could just barely see that something like +a big building had grown up during the night. Then I watched it, and +watched it, until I made out it was a whole house; and after that it +was not long before I guessed what had happened. It seemed a simpler +thing to me, you know, than it did to you, because I had often thought +about it, and probably you never had." +</P> + +<P> +"You are right there," said I, earnestly. "It would have been +impossible for me to imagine such a thing." +</P> + +<P> +"At first I thought there was nobody in the house," said she, "but when +I heard some one moving about, I came down to tell whoever had arrived +not to make a noise. I see," she added, with another of her smiles, +"that you think I am a very strange person not to be more flurried by +what has happened. But really I cannot think of anything else just +now, except what mother will say and do when she comes down and finds +you and your house here at the back door. I am very sure she will not +like it." +</P> + +<P> +"Like it!" I exclaimed. "Who on earth could like it?" +</P> + +<P> +"Please speak more gently," she said. "Mother is always a little +irritable when her night's rest has been broken, and I would not like +to have her wakened up suddenly now. But really, Mr. Warren, I haven't +the least idea in the world how she will take this thing. I must go in +and be with her when she wakes, so that I can explain just what has +happened." +</P> + +<P> +"One moment," I said. "You know my name." +</P> + +<P> +"Of course I know your name," she answered. "Could that house be up +there on the hillside for more than a year without my knowing who lived +in it?" With this she went indoors. +</P> + +<P> +I could not help smiling when I thought of the young lady regretting +that there was no man in the house who might help me do something. +What could anybody do in a case like this? I turned and went into my +house. I entered the various rooms on the lower floor, and saw no +signs of any particular damage, except that everything movable in each +room was jumbled together against the front wall. But when I looked +out of the back door I found that the porch there was a good deal +wrecked, which I had not noticed before. +</P> + +<P> +I went up-stairs, and found everything very much as it was below. +Nothing seemed to have been injured except the chimney and the porches. +I thanked my stars that I had used hard wood instead of mortar for the +ceilings of my rooms. +</P> + +<P> +I was about to go into my bedroom, when I heard a woman scream, and of +course I hurried to the front. There on the back porch of her house +stood Mrs. Carson. She was a woman of middle age, and, as I glanced at +her, I saw where her daughter got her good looks. But the placidity +and cheerfulness of the younger face were entirely wanting in the +mother. Her eyes sparkled, her cheeks were red, her mouth was partly +opened, and it seemed to me that I could almost see that her breath was +hot. +</P> + +<P> +"Is this your house?" she cried, the moment her eyes fell upon me. +"And what is it doing here?" I did not immediately answer, I looked at +the angry woman, and behind her I saw, through the open door, the +daughter crossing the hallway. It was plain that she had decided to +let me have it out with her mother without interference. As briefly +and as clearly as I could, I explained what had happened. +</P> + +<P> +"What is all that to me?" she screamed. "It doesn't matter to me how +your house got here. There have been storms ever since the beginning +of the world, and I never heard of any of them taking a house into a +person's back yard. You ought not to have built your house where any +such thing could happen. But all this is nothing to me. I don't +understand now how your house did get here, and I don't want to +understand it. All I want is for you to take it away." +</P> + +<P> +"I will do that, madam, just as soon as I can. You may be very sure I +will do that. But—" +</P> + +<P> +"Can you do it now?" she asked. "Can you do it to-day? I don't want a +minute lost. I have not been outside to see what damage has been done, +but the first thing to do is to take your house away." +</P> + +<P> +"I am going to the town now, madam, to summon assistance." +</P> + +<P> +Mrs. Carson made no answer, but she turned and walked to the end of her +porch. There she suddenly gave a scream which quickly brought her +daughter from the house. "Kitty! Kitty!" cried her mother. "Do you +know what he has done? He has gone right over my round flower-garden. +His house is sitting on it this minute!" +</P> + +<P> +"But he could not help it, mother," said Kitty. +</P> + +<P> +"Help it!" exclaimed Mrs. Carson. "I didn't expect him to help it. +What I want—" Suddenly she stopped. Her eyes flashed brighter, her +mouth opened wider, and she became more and more excited as she noticed +the absence of the sheds, fences, or vegetable-beds which had found +themselves in the course of my all-destroying dwelling. +</P> + +<P> +It was now well on in the morning, and some of the neighbors had become +aware of the strange disaster which had happened to me, although if +they had heard the news from Mrs. Carson they might have supposed that +it was a disaster which had happened only to her. As they gazed at the +two houses so closely jammed together, all of them wondered, some of +them even laughed, but not one offered a suggestion which afforded +satisfaction to Mrs. Carson or myself. The general opinion was that, +now my house was there, it would have to stay there, for there were not +enough horses in the State to pull it back up that mountainside. To be +sure, it might possibly be drawn off sidewise. But whether it was +moved one way or the other, a lot of Mrs. Carson's trees would have to +be cut down to let it pass. +</P> + +<P> +"Which shall never happen!" cried that good lady. "If nothing else can +be done, it must be taken apart and hauled off in carts. But no matter +how it is managed, it must be moved, and that immediately." Miss +Carson now prevailed upon her mother to go into the house, and I stayed +and talked to the men and a few women who had gathered outside. +</P> + +<P> +When they had said all they had to say, and seen all there was to see, +these people went home to their breakfasts. I entered my house, but +not by the front door, for to do that I would have been obliged to +trespass upon Mrs. Carson's back porch. I got my hat, and was about to +start for the town, when I heard my name called. Turning into the +hall, I saw Miss Carson, who was standing at my front door. +</P> + +<P> +"Mr. Warren," said she, "you haven't any way of getting breakfast, have +you?" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, no," said I. "My servants are up there in their cabin, and I +suppose they are too much scared to come down. But I am going to town +to see what can be done about my house, and will get my breakfast +there." +</P> + +<P> +"It's a long way to go without anything to eat," she said, "and we can +give you some breakfast. But I want to ask you something. I am in a +good deal of perplexity. Our two servants are out at the front of the +house, but they positively refuse to come in; they are afraid that your +house may begin sliding again and crush them all, so, I shall have to +get breakfast. But what bothers me is trying to find our well. I have +been outside, and can see no signs of it." +</P> + +<P> +"Where was your well?" I gasped. +</P> + +<P> +"It ought to be somewhere near the back of your house," she said. "May +I go through your hall and look out?" +</P> + +<P> +"Of course you may," I cried, and I preceded her to my back door. +</P> + +<P> +"Now, it seems to me," she said, after surveying the scene of +desolation immediately before, and looking from side to side toward +objects which had remained untouched, "that your house has passed +directly over our well, and must have carried away the little shed and +the pump and everything above ground. I should not wonder a bit," she +continued slowly, "if it is under your porch." +</P> + +<P> +I jumped to the ground, for the steps were shattered, and began to +search for the well, and it was not long before I discovered its round +dark opening, which was, as Miss Carson had imagined, under one end of +my porch. +</P> + +<P> +"What can we do?" she asked. "We can't have breakfast or get along at +all without water." It was a terribly depressing thing to me to think +that I, or rather my house, had given these people so much trouble. +But I speedily, assured Miss Carson that if she could find a bucket and +a rope which I could lower into the well, I would provide her with +water. +</P> + +<P> +She went into her house to see what she could find, and I tore away the +broken planks of the porch, so that I could get to the well. And then, +when she came with a tin pail and a clothes-line, I went to work to +haul up water and carry it to her back door. +</P> + +<P> +"I don't want mother to find out what has happened to the well," she +said, "for she has enough on her mind already." +</P> + +<P> +Mrs. Carson was a woman with some good points in her character. After +a time she called to me herself, and told me to come in to breakfast. +But during the meal she talked very earnestly to me about the amazing +trespass I had committed, and about the means which should be taken to +repair the damages my house had done to her property. I was as +optimistic as I could be, and the young lady spoke very cheerfully and +hopefully about the affair, so that we were beginning to get along +somewhat pleasantly, when, suddenly, Mrs. Carson sprang to her feet. +"Heavens and earth!" she cried, "this house is moving!" +</P> + +<P> +She was not mistaken. I had felt beneath my feet a sudden sharp +shock—not severe, but unmistakable. I remembered that both houses +stood upon slightly sloping ground. My blood turned cold, my heart +stood still; even Miss Carson was pale. +</P> + +<P> +When we had rushed out of doors to see what had happened, or what was +going to happen, I soon found that we had been needlessly frightened. +Some of the broken timbers on which my house had been partially resting +had given way, and the front part of the building had slightly +descended, jarring as it did so the other house against which it +rested. I endeavored to prove to Mrs. Carson that the result was +encouraging rather than otherwise, for my house was now more firmly +settled than it had been. But she did not value the opinion of a man +who did not know enough to put his house in a place where it would be +likely to stay, and she could eat no more breakfast, and was even +afraid to stay under her own roof until experienced mechanics had been +summoned to look into the state of affairs. +</P> + +<P> +I hurried away to the town, and it was not long before several +carpenters and masons were on the spot. After a thorough examination, +they assured Mrs. Carson that there was no danger, that my house would +do no farther damage to her premises, but, to make things certain, they +would bring some heavy beams and brace the front of my house against +her cellar wall. When that should be done it would be impossible for +it to move any farther. +</P> + +<P> +"But I don't want it braced!" cried Mrs. Carson. "I want it taken +away. I want it out of my back yard!" +</P> + +<P> +The master carpenter was a man of imagination and expedients. "That is +quite another thing, ma'am," said he. "We'll fix this gentleman's +house so that you needn't be afraid of it, and then, when the time +comes to move it, there's several ways of doing that. We might rig up +a powerful windlass at the top of the hill, and perhaps get a +steam-engine to turn it, and we could fasten cables to the house and +haul her back to where she belongs." +</P> + +<P> +"And can you take your oaths," cried Mrs. Carson, "that those ropes +won't break, and when that house gets half-way up the hill it won't +come sliding down ten times faster than it did, and crash into me and +mine and everything I own on earth? No, sir! I'll have no house +hauled up a hill back of me!" +</P> + +<P> +"Of course," said the carpenter, "it would be a great deal easier to +move it on this ground, which is almost level—" +</P> + +<P> +"And cut down my trees to do it! No, sir!" +</P> + +<P> +"Well, then," said he, "there is no way to do but to take it apart and +haul it off." +</P> + +<P> +"Which would make an awful time at the back of my house while you were +doing it!" exclaimed Mrs. Carson. +</P> + +<P> +I now put in a word. "There's only one thing to do that I can see!" I +exclaimed. "I will sell it to a match factory. It is almost all wood, +and it can be cut up in sections about two inches thick, and then split +into matches." +</P> + +<P> +Kitty smiled. "I should like to see them," she said, "taking away the +little sticks in wheelbarrows!" +</P> + +<P> +"There is no need of trifling on the subject," said Mrs. Carson. "I +have had a great deal to bear, and I must bear it no longer than is +necessary. I have just found out that in order to get water out of my +own well, I must go to the back porch of a stranger. Such things +cannot be endured. If my son George were here, he would tell me what I +ought to do. I shall write to him, and see what he advises. I do not +mind waiting a little bit, now that I know that you can fix Mr. +Warren's house so that it won't move any farther." +</P> + +<P> +Thus the matter was left. My house was braced that afternoon, and +toward evening I started to go to a hotel in the town to spend the +night. +</P> + +<P> +"No, sir!" said Mrs. Carson. "Do you suppose that I am going to stay +here all night with a great empty house jammed up against me, and +everybody knowing that it is empty? It will be the same as having +thieves in my own house to have them in yours. You have come down here +in your property, and you can stay in it and take care of it!" +</P> + +<P> +"I don't object to that in the least," I said. "My two women are here, +and I can tell them to attend to my meals. I haven't any chimney, but +I suppose they can make a fire some way or other." +</P> + +<P> +"No, sir!" said Mrs. Carson. "I am not going to have any strange +servants on my place. I have just been able to prevail upon my own +women to go into the house, and I don't want any more trouble. I have +had enough already!" +</P> + +<P> +"But, my dear madam," said I, "you don't want me to go to the town, and +you won't allow me to have any cooking done here. What am I to do?" +</P> + +<P> +"Well," she said, "you can eat with us. It may be two or three days +before I can hear from my son George, and in the meantime you can lodge +in your own house and I will take you to board. That is the best way I +can see of managing the thing. But I am very sure I am not going to be +left here alone in the dreadful predicament in which you have put me." +</P> + +<P> +We had scarcely finished supper when Jack Brandiger came to see me. He +laughed a good deal a about my sudden change of base, but thought, on +the whole, my house had made a very successful move. It must be more +pleasant in the valley than up on that windy hill. Jack was very much +interested in everything, and when Mrs. Carson and her daughter +appeared, as we were walking about viewing the scene, I felt myself +obliged to introduce him. +</P> + +<P> +"I like those ladies," said he to me, afterwards. "I think you have +chosen very agreeable neighbors." +</P> + +<P> +"How do you know you like them?" said I. "You had scarcely anything to +say to Mrs. Carson." +</P> + +<P> +"No, to be sure," said he. "But I expect I should like her. By the +way, do you know how you used to talk to me about coming and living +somewhere near you? How would you like me to take one of your rooms +now? I might cheer you up." +</P> + +<P> +"No," said I, firmly. "That cannot be done. As things are now, I have +as much as I can do to get along here by myself." +</P> + +<P> +Mrs. Carson did not hear from her son for nearly a week, and then he +wrote that he found it almost impossible to give her any advice. He +thought it was a very queer state of affairs. He had never heard of +anything like it. But he would try and arrange his business so that he +could come home in a week or two and look into matters. +</P> + +<P> +As I was thus compelled to force myself upon the close neighborhood of +Mrs. Carson and her daughter, I endeavored to make things as pleasant +as possible. I brought some of my men down out of the vineyard, and +set them to repairing fences, putting the garden in order, and doing +all that I could to remedy the doleful condition of things which I had +unwillingly brought into the back yard of this quiet family. I rigged +up a pump on my back porch by which the water of the well could be +conveniently obtained, and in every way endeavored to repair damages. +</P> + +<P> +But Mrs. Carson never ceased to talk about the unparalleled disaster +which had come upon her, and she must have had a great deal of +correspondence with her son George, because she gave me frequent +messages from him. He could not come on to look into the state of +affairs, but he seemed to be giving it a great deal of thought and +attention. +</P> + +<P> +Spring weather had come again, and it was very pleasant to help the +Carson ladies get their flower-garden in order—at least, as much as +was left of it, for my house was resting upon some of the most +important beds. As I was obliged to give up all present idea of doing +anything in the way of getting my residence out of a place where it had +no business to be, because Mrs. Carson would not consent to any plan +which had been suggested, I felt that I was offering some little +compensation in beautifying what seemed to be, at that time, my own +grounds. +</P> + +<P> +My labors in regard to vines, bushes, and all that sort of thing were +generally carried on under direction of Mrs. Carson or her daughter, +and as the elderly lady was a very busy housewife, the horticultural +work was generally left to Miss Kitty and me. +</P> + +<P> +I liked Miss Kitty. She was a cheerful, whole-souled person, and I +sometimes thought that she was not so unwilling to have me for a +neighbor as the rest of the family seemed to be; for if I were to judge +the disposition of her brother George from what her mother told me +about his letters, both he and Mrs. Carson must be making a great many +plans to get me off the premises. +</P> + +<P> +Nearly a month had now passed since my house and I made that remarkable +morning call upon Mrs. Carson. I was becoming accustomed to my present +mode of living, and, so far as I was concerned, it satisfied me very +well. I certainly lived a great deal better than when I was depending +upon my old negro cook. Miss Kitty seemed to be satisfied with things +as they were, and so, in some respects, did her mother. But the latter +never ceased to give me extracts from some of her son George's letters, +and this was always annoying and worrying to me. Evidently he was not +pleased with me as such a close neighbor to his mother, and it was +astonishing how many expedients he proposed in order to rid her of my +undesirable proximity. +</P> + +<P> +"My son George," said Mrs. Carson, one morning, "has been writing to me +about jack-screws. He says that the greatest improvements have been +made in jack-screws." +</P> + +<P> +"What do you do with them, mother?" asked Miss Kitty. +</P> + +<P> +"You lift houses with them," said she. "He says that in large cities +they lift whole blocks of houses with them and build stories +underneath. He thinks that we can get rid of our trouble here if we +use jack-screws." +</P> + +<P> +"But how does he propose to use them?" I asked. +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, he has a good many plans," answered Mrs. Carson. "He said that he +should not wonder if jack-screws could be made large enough to lift +your house entirely over mine and set it out in the road, where it +could be carried away without interfering with anything, except, of +course, vehicles which might be coming along. But he has another +plan—that is, to lift my house up and carry it out into the field on +the other side of the road, and then your house might be carried along +right over the cellar until it got to the road. In that way, he says, +the bushes and trees would not have to be interfered with." +</P> + +<P> +"I think brother George is cracked!" said Kitty. +</P> + +<P> +All this sort of thing worried me very much. My mind was eminently +disposed toward peace and tranquillity, but who could be peaceful and +tranquil with a prospective jack-screw under the very base of his +comfort and happiness? In fact, my house had never been such a happy +home as it was at that time. The fact of its unwarranted position upon +other people's grounds had ceased to trouble me. +</P> + +<P> +But the coming son George, with his jack-screws, did trouble me very +much, and that afternoon I deliberately went into Mrs. Carson's house +to look for Kitty. I knew her mother was not at home, for I had seen +her go out. When Kitty appeared I asked her to come out on her back +porch. "Have you thought of any new plan of moving it?" she said, with +a smile, as we sat down. +</P> + +<P> +"No," said I, earnestly. "I have not, and I don't want to think of any +plan of moving it. I am tired of seeing it here, I am tired of +thinking about moving it away, and I am tired of hearing people talk +about moving it. I have not any right to be here, and I am never +allowed to forget it. What I want to do is to go entirely away, and +leave everything behind me—except one thing." +</P> + +<P> +"And what is that?" asked Kitty. +</P> + +<P> +"You," I answered. +</P> + +<P> +She turned a little pale and did not reply. +</P> + +<P> +"You understand me, Kitty," I said. "There is nothing in the world +that I care for but you. What have you to say to me?" +</P> + +<P> +Then came back to her her little smile. "I think it would be very +foolish for us to go away," she said. +</P> + +<P> +It was about a quarter of an hour after this when Kitty proposed that +we should go out to the front of the house; it would look queer if any +of the servants should come by and see us sitting together like that. +I had forgotten that there were other people in the world, but I went +with her. +</P> + +<P> +We were standing on the front porch, close to each other, and I think +we were holding each other's hands, when Mrs. Carson came back. As she +approached she looked at us inquiringly, plainly wishing to know why we +were standing side by side before her door as if we had some special +object in so doing. +</P> + +<P> +"Well?" said she, as she came up the steps. Of course it was right +that I should speak, and, in as few words as possible, I told her what +Kitty and I had been saying to each other. I never saw Kitty's mother +look so cheerful and so handsome as when she came forward and kissed +her daughter and shook hands with me. She seemed so perfectly +satisfied that it amazed me. After a little Kitty left us, and then +Mrs. Carson asked me to sit by her on a rustic bench. +</P> + +<P> +"Now," said she, "this will straighten out things in the very best way. +When you are married, you and Kitty can live in the back +building,—for, of course, your house will now be the same thing as a +back building,—and you can have the second floor. We won't have any +separate tables, because it will be a great deal nicer for you and +Kitty to live with me, and it will simply be your paying board for two +persons instead of one. And you know you can manage your vineyard just +as well from the bottom of the hill as from the top. The lower rooms +of what used to be your house can be made very pleasant and comfortable +for all of us. I have been thinking about the room on the right that +you had planned for a parlor, and it will make a lovely sitting-room +for us, which is a thing we have never had, and the room on the other +side is just what will suit beautifully for a guest-chamber. The two +houses together, with the roof of my back porch properly joined to the +front of your house, will make a beautiful and spacious dwelling. It +was fortunate, too, that you painted your house a light yellow. I have +often looked at the two together, and thought what a good thing it was +that one was not one color and the other another. As to the pump, it +will be very easy now to put a pipe from what used to be your back +porch to our kitchen, so that we can get water without being obliged to +carry it. Between us we can make all sorts of improvements, and some +time I will tell you of a good many that I have thought of. +</P> + +<P> +"What used to be your house," she continued, "can be jack-screwed up a +little bit and a good foundation put under it. I have inquired about +that. Of course it would not have been proper to let you know that I +was satisfied with the state of things, but I was satisfied, and there +is no use of denying it. As soon as I got over my first scare after +that house came down the hill, and had seen how everything might be +arranged to suit all parties, I said to myself, `What the Lord has +joined together, let not man put asunder,' and so, according to my +belief, the strongest kind of jack-screws could not put these two +houses asunder, any more than they could put you and Kitty asunder, now +that you have agreed to take each other for each other's own." +</P> + +<P> +Jack Brandiger came to call that evening, and when he had heard what +had happened he whistled a good deal. "You are a funny kind of a +fellow," said he. "You go courting like a snail, with your house on +your back!" +</P> + +<P> +I think my friend was a little discomfited. "Don't be discouraged, +Jack," said I. "You will get a good wife some of these days—that is, +if you don't try to slide uphill to find her!" +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR> + +<A NAME="chap12"></A> +<H3 ALIGN="center"> +OUR ARCHERY CLUB +</H3> + +<P> +When an archery club was formed in our village, I was among the first +to join it. But I should not, on this account, claim any extraordinary +enthusiasm on the subject of archery, for nearly all the ladies and +gentlemen of the place were also among the first to join. +</P> + +<P> +Few of us, I think, had a correct idea of the popularity of archery in +our midst until the subject of a club was broached. Then we all +perceived what a strong interest we felt in the study and use of the +bow and arrow. The club was formed immediately, and our thirty members +began to discuss the relative merits of lancewood, yew, and greenheart +bows, and to survey yards and lawns for suitable spots for setting up +targets for home practice. +</P> + +<P> +Our weekly meetings, at which we came together to show in friendly +contest how much our home practice had taught us, were held upon the +village green, or rather upon what had been intended to be the village +green. This pretty piece of ground, partly in smooth lawn and partly +shaded by fine trees, was the property of a gentleman of the place, who +had presented it, under certain conditions, to the township. But as +the township had never fulfilled any of the conditions, and had done +nothing toward the improvement of the spot, further than to make it a +grazing-place for local cows and goats, the owner had withdrawn his +gift, shut out the cows and goats by a picket fence, and, having locked +the gate, had hung up the key in his barn. When our club was formed, +the green, as it was still called, was offered to us for our meetings, +and, with proper gratitude, we elected its owner to be our president. +</P> + +<P> +This gentleman was eminently qualified for the presidency of an archery +club. In the first place, he did not shoot: this gave him time and +opportunity to attend to the shooting of others. He was a tall and +pleasant man, a little elderly. This "elderliness," if I may so put +it, seemed, in his case, to resemble some mild disorder, like a gentle +rheumatism, which, while it prevented him from indulging in all the +wild hilarities of youth, gave him, in compensation, a position, as one +entitled to a certain consideration, which was very agreeable to him. +His little disease was chronic, it is true, and it was growing upon +him; but it was, so far, a pleasant ailment. +</P> + +<P> +And so, with as much interest in bows and arrows and targets and +successful shots as any of us, he never fitted an arrow to a string, +nor drew a bow. But he attended every meeting, settling disputed +points (for he studied all the books on archery), encouraging the +disheartened, holding back the eager ones who would run to the targets +as soon as they had shot, regardless of the fact that others were still +shooting and that the human body is not arrow-proof, and shedding about +him that general aid and comfort which emanates from a good fellow, no +matter what he may say or do. +</P> + +<P> +There were persons—outsiders—who said that archery clubs always +selected ladies for their presiding officers, but we did not care to be +too much bound down and trammelled by customs and traditions. Another +club might not have among its members such a genial elderly gentleman +who owned a village green. +</P> + +<P> +I soon found myself greatly interested in archery, especially when I +succeeded in planting an arrow somewhere within the periphery of the +target, but I never became such an enthusiast in bow-shooting as my +friend Pepton. +</P> + +<P> +If Pepton could have arranged matters to suit himself, he would have +been born an archer. But as this did not happen to have been the case, +he employed every means in his power to rectify what he considered this +serious error in his construction. He gave his whole soul, and the +greater part of his spare time, to archery, and as he was a young man +of energy, this helped him along wonderfully. +</P> + +<P> +His equipments were perfect. No one could excel him in, this respect. +His bow was snakewood, backed with hickory. He carefully rubbed it +down every evening with oil and beeswax, and it took its repose in a +green baize bag. His arrows were Philip Highfield's best, his strings +the finest Flanders hemp. He had shooting-gloves, and little leather +tips that could be screwed fast on the ends of what he called his +string-fingers. He had a quiver and a belt, and when equipped for the +weekly meetings, he carried a fancy-colored wiping-tassel, and a little +ebony grease-pot hanging from his belt. He wore, when shooting, a +polished arm-guard or bracer, and if he had heard of anything else that +an archer should have, he straightway would have procured it. +</P> + +<P> +Pepton was a single man, and he lived with two good old maiden ladies, +who took as much care of him as if they had been his mothers. And he +was such a good, kind fellow that he deserved all the attention they +gave him. They felt a great interest in his archery pursuits, and +shared his anxious solicitude in the selection of a suitable place to +hang his bow. +</P> + +<P> +"You see," said he, "a fine bow like this, when not in use, should +always be in a perfectly dry place." +</P> + +<P> +"And when in use, too," said Miss Martha, "for I am sure that you +oughtn't to be standing and shooting in any damp spot. There's no +surer way of gettin' chilled." +</P> + +<P> +To which sentiment Miss Maria agreed, and suggested wearing rubber +shoes, or having a board to stand on, when the club met after a rain. +</P> + +<P> +Pepton first hung his bow in the hall, but after he had arranged it +symmetrically upon two long nails (bound with green worsted, lest they +should scratch the bow through its woollen cover), he reflected that +the front door would frequently be open, and that damp drafts must +often go through the hall. He was sorry to give up this place for his +bow, for it was convenient and appropriate, and for an instant he +thought that it might remain, if the front door could be kept shut, and +visitors admitted through a little side door which the family generally +used, and which was almost as convenient as the other—except, indeed, +on wash-days, when a wet sheet or some article of wearing apparel was +apt to be hung in front of it. But although wash-day occurred but once +a week, and although it was comparatively easy, after a little +practice, to bob under a high-propped sheet, Pepton's heart was too +kind to allow his mind to dwell upon this plan. So he drew the nails +from the wall of the hall, and put them up in various places about the +house. His own room had to be aired a great deal in all weathers, and +so that would not do at all. The wall above the kitchen fireplace +would be a good location, for the chimney was nearly always warm. But +Pepton could not bring himself to keep his bow in the kitchen. There +would be nothing esthetic about such a disposition of it, and, besides, +the girl might be tempted to string and bend it. The old ladies really +did not want it in the parlor, for its length and its green baize cover +would make it an encroaching and unbecoming neighbor to the little +engravings and the big samplers, the picture-frames of acorns and +pine-cones, the fancifully patterned ornaments of clean wheat straw, +and all the quaint adornments which had hung upon those walls for so +many years. But they did not say so. If it had been necessary, to +make room for the bow, they would have taken down the pencilled +profiles of their grandfather, their grandmother, and their father when +a little boy, which hung in a row over the mantelpiece. +</P> + +<P> +However, Pepton did not ask this sacrifice. In the summer evenings the +parlor windows must be open. The dining-room was really very little +used in the evening, except when Miss Maria had stockings to darn, and +then she always sat in that apartment, and of course she had the +windows open. But Miss Maria was very willing to bring her work into +the parlor,—it was foolish, anyway, to have a feeling about darning +stockings before chance company,—and then the dining-room could be +kept shut up after tea. So into the wall of that neat little room +Pepton drove his worsted-covered nails, and on them carefully laid his +bow. All the next day Miss Martha and Miss Maria went about the house, +covering the nail-holes he had made with bits of wallpaper, carefully +snipped out to fit the patterns, and pasted on so neatly that no one +would have suspected they were there. +</P> + +<P> +One afternoon, as I was passing the old ladies' house, saw, or thought +I saw, two men carrying in a coffin. I was struck with alarm. +</P> + +<P> +"What!" I thought. "Can either of those good women— Or can Pepton—" +</P> + +<P> +Without a moment's hesitation, I rushed in behind the men. There, at +the foot of the stairs, directing them, stood Pepton. Then it was not +he! I seized him sympathetically by the hand. +</P> + +<P> +"Which?" I faltered. "Which? Who is that coffin for?" +</P> + +<P> +"Coffin!" cried Pepton. "Why, my dear fellow, that is not a coffin. +That is my ascham." +</P> + +<P> +"Ascham?" I exclaimed. "What is that?" +</P> + +<P> +"Come and look at it," he said, when the men had set it on end against +the wall. "It is an upright closet or receptacle for an archer's +armament. Here is a place to stand the bow, here are supports for the +arrows and quivers, here are shelves and hooks, on which to lay or hang +everything the merry man can need. You see, moreover, that it is lined +with green plush, that the door fits tightly, so that it can stand +anywhere, and there need be no fear of drafts or dampness affecting my +bow. Isn't it a perfect thing? You ought to get one." +</P> + +<P> +I admitted the perfection, but agreed no further. I had not the income +of my good Pepton. +</P> + +<P> +Pepton was, indeed, most wonderfully well equipped; and yet, little did +those dear old ladies think, when they carefully dusted and +reverentially gazed at the bunches of arrows, the arm-bracers, the +gloves, the grease-pots, and all the rest of the paraphernalia of +archery, as it hung around Pepton's room, or when they afterwards +allowed a particular friend to peep at it, all arranged so orderly +within the ascham, or when they looked with sympathetic, loving +admiration on the beautiful polished bow, when it was taken out of its +bag—little did they think, I say, that Pepton was the very poorest +shot in the club. In all the surface of the much-perforated targets of +the club, there was scarcely a hole that he could put his hand upon his +heart and say he made. +</P> + +<P> +Indeed, I think it was the truth that Pepton was born not to be an +archer. There were young fellows in the club who shot with bows that +cost no more than Pepton's tassels, but who could stand up and whang +arrows into the targets all the afternoon, if they could get a chance; +and there were ladies who made hits five times out of six; and there +were also all the grades of archers common to any club. But there was +no one but himself in Pepton's grade. He stood alone, and it was never +any trouble to add up his score. +</P> + +<P> +Yet he was not discouraged. He practised every day except Sundays, and +indeed he was the only person in the club who practised at night. When +he told me about this, I was a little surprised. +</P> + +<P> +"Why, it's easy enough," said he. "You see, I hung a lantern, with a +reflector, before the target, just a little to one side. It lighted up +the target beautifully, and I believe there was a better chance of +hitting it than by daylight, for the only thing you could see was the +target, and so your attention was not distracted. To be sure," he +said, in answer to a question, "it was a good deal of trouble to find +the arrows, but that I always have. When I get so expert that I can +put all the arrows into the target, there will be no trouble of the +kind, night or day. However," he continued, "I don't practise any more +by night. The other evening I sent an arrow slam-bang into the +lantern, and broke it all to flinders. Borrowed lantern, too. +Besides, I found it made Miss Martha very nervous to have me shooting +about the house after dark. She had a friend who had a little boy who +was hit in the leg by an arrow from a bow, which, she says, +accidentally went off in the night, of its own accord. She is +certainly a little mixed in her mind in regard to this matter, but I +wish to respect her feelings, and so shall not use another lantern." +</P> + +<P> +As I have said, there were many good archers among the ladies of our +club. Some of them, after we had been organized for a month or two, +made scores that few of the gentlemen could excel. But the lady who +attracted the greatest attention when she shot was Miss Rosa. +</P> + +<P> +When this very pretty young lady stood up before the ladies' +target—her left side well advanced, her bow firmly held out in her +strong left arm, which never quivered, her head a little bent to the +right, her arrow drawn back by three well-gloved fingers to the tip of +her little ear, her dark eyes steadily fixed upon the gold, and her +dress, well fitted over her fine and vigorous figure, falling in +graceful folds about her feet, we all stopped shooting to look at her. +</P> + +<P> +"There is something statuesque about her," said Pepton, who ardently +admired her, "and yet there isn't. A statue could never equal her +unless we knew there was a probability of movement in it. And the only +statues which have that are the Jarley wax-works, which she does not +resemble in the least. There is only one thing that that girl needs to +make her a perfect archer, and that is to be able to aim better." +</P> + +<P> +This was true. Miss Rosa did need to aim better. Her arrows had a +curious habit of going on all sides of the target, and it was very +seldom that one chanced to stick into it. For if she did make a hit, +we all knew it was chance and that there was no probability of her +doing it again. Once she put an arrow right into the centre of the +gold,—one of the finest shots ever made on the ground,—but she didn't +hit the target again for two weeks. She was almost as bad a shot as +Pepton, and that is saying a good deal. +</P> + +<P> +One evening I was sitting with Pepton on the little front porch of the +old ladies' house, where we were taking our after-dinner smoke while +Miss Martha and Miss Maria were washing, with their own white hands, +the china and glass in which they took so much pride. I often used to +go over and spend an hour with Pepton. He liked to have some one to +whom he could talk on the subjects which filled his soul, and I liked +to hear him talk. +</P> + +<P> +"I tell you," said he, as he leaned back in his chair, with his feet +carefully disposed on the railing so that they would not injure Miss +Maria's Madeira-vine, "I tell you, sir, that there are two things I +crave with all my power of craving—two goals I fain would reach, two +diadems I would wear upon my brow. One of these is to kill an +eagle—or some large bird—with a shaft from my good bow. I would then +have it stuffed and mounted, with the very arrow that killed it still +sticking in its breast. This trophy of my skill I would have fastened +against the wall of my room or my hall, and I would feel proud to think +that my grandchildren could point to that bird—which I would carefully +bequeath to my descendants—and say, `My grand'ther shot that bird, and +with that very arrow.' Would it not stir your pulses if you could do a +thing like that?" +</P> + +<P> +"I should have to stir them up a good deal before I could do it," I +replied. "It would be a hard thing to shoot an eagle with an arrow. +If you want a stuffed bird to bequeath, you'd better use a rifle." +</P> + +<P> +"A rifle!" exclaimed Pepton. "There would be no glory in that. There +are lots of birds shot with rifles—eagles, hawks, wild geese, +tomtits—" +</P> + +<P> +"Oh, no!" I interrupted, "not tomtits." +</P> + +<P> +"Well, perhaps they are too little for a rifle," said he. "But what I +mean to say is that I wouldn't care at all for an eagle I had shot with +a rifle. You couldn't show the ball that killed him. If it were put +in properly, it would be inside, where it couldn't be seen. No, sir. +It is ever so much more honorable, and far more difficult, too, to hit +an eagle than to hit a target." +</P> + +<P> +"That is very true," I answered, "especially in these days, when there +are so few eagles and so many targets. But what is your other diadem?" +</P> + +<P> +"That," said Pepton, "is to see Miss Rosa wear the badge." +</P> + +<P> +"Indeed!" said I. And from that moment I began to understand Pepton's +hopes in regard to the grandmother of those children who should point +to the eagle. +</P> + +<P> +"Yes, sir," he continued, "I should be truly happy to see her win the +badge. And she ought to win it. No one shoots more correctly, and +with a better understanding of all the rules, than she does. There +must truly be something the matter with her aiming. I've half a mind +to coach her a little." +</P> + +<P> +I turned aside to see who was coming down the road. I would not have +had him know I smiled. +</P> + +<P> +The most objectionable person in our club was O. J. Hollingsworth. He +was a good enough fellow in himself, but it was as an archer that we +objected to him. +</P> + +<P> +There was, so far as I know, scarcely a rule of archery that he did not +habitually violate. Our president and nearly all of us remonstrated +with him, and Pepton even went to see him on the subject, but it was +all to no purpose. With a quiet disregard of other people's ideas +about bow-shooting and other people's opinions about himself, he +persevered in a style of shooting which appeared absolutely absurd to +any one who knew anything of the rules and methods of archery. +</P> + +<P> +I used to like to look at him when his turn came around to shoot. He +was not such a pleasing object of vision as Miss Rosa, but his style +was so entirely novel to me that it was interesting. He held the bow +horizontally, instead of perpendicularly, like other archers, and he +held it well down—about opposite his waistband. He did not draw his +arrow back to his ear, but he drew it back to the lower button of his +vest. Instead of standing upright, with his left side to the target, +he faced it full, and leaned forward over his arrow, in an attitude +which reminded me of a Roman soldier about to fall upon his sword. +When he had seized the nock of his arrow between his finger and thumb, +he languidly glanced at the target, raised his bow a little, and let +fly. The provoking thing about it was that he nearly always hit. If +he had only known how to stand, and hold his bow, and draw back his +arrow, he would have been a very good archer. But, as it was, we could +not help laughing at him, although our president always discountenanced +anything of the kind. +</P> + +<P> +Our champion was a tall man, very cool and steady, who went to work at +archery exactly as if he were paid a salary, and intended to earn his +money honestly. He did the best he could in every way. He generally +shot with one of the bows owned by the club, but if any one on the +ground had a better one, he would borrow it. He used to shoot +sometimes with Pepton's bow, which he declared to be a most capital +one. But as Pepton was always very nervous when he saw his bow in the +hands of another than himself, the champion soon ceased to borrow it. +</P> + +<P> +There were two badges, one of green silk and gold for the ladies, and +one of green and red for the gentlemen, and these were shot for at each +weekly meeting. With the exception of a few times when the club was +first formed, the champion had always worn the gentlemen's badge. Many +of us tried hard to win it from him, but we never could succeed; he +shot too well. +</P> + +<P> +On the morning of one of our meeting days, the champion told me, as I +was going to the city with him, that he would not be able to return at +his usual hour that afternoon. He would be very busy, and would have +to wait for the six-fifteen train, which would bring him home too late +for the archery meeting. So he gave me the badge, asking me to hand it +to the president, that he might bestow it on the successful competitor +that afternoon. +</P> + +<P> +We were all rather glad that the champion was obliged to be absent. +Here was a chance for some one of us to win the badge. It was not, +indeed, an opportunity for us to win a great deal of honor, for if the +champion were to be there we should have no chance at all. But we were +satisfied with this much, having no reason—in the present, at +least—to expect anything more. +</P> + +<P> +So we went to the targets with a new zeal, and most of us shot better +than we had ever shot before. In this number was O. J. Hollingsworth. +He excelled himself, and, what was worse, he excelled all the rest of +us. He actually made a score of eighty-five in twenty-four shots, +which at that time was remarkably good shooting, for our club. This +was dreadful! To have a fellow who didn't know how to shoot beat us +all was too bad. If any visitor who knew anything at all of archery +should see that the member who wore the champion's badge was a man who +held his bow as if he had the stomach-ache, it would ruin our character +as a club. It was not to be borne. +</P> + +<P> +Pepton in particular felt greatly outraged. We had met very promptly +that afternoon, and had finished our regular shooting much earlier than +usual; and now a knot of us were gathered together, talking over this +unfortunate occurrence. +</P> + +<P> +"I don't intend to stand it," Pepton suddenly exclaimed. "I feel it as +a personal disgrace. I'm going to have the champion here before dark. +By the rules, he has a right to shoot until the president declares it +is too late. Some of you fellows stay here, and I'll bring him." +</P> + +<P> +And away he ran, first giving me charge of his precious bow. There was +no need of his asking us to stay. We were bound to see the fun out, +and to fill up the time our president offered a special prize of a +handsome bouquet from his gardens, to be shot for by the ladies. +</P> + +<P> +Pepton ran to the railroad station, and telegraphed to the champion. +This was his message: +</P> + +<BR> + +<P> +"You are absolutely needed here. If possible, take the five-thirty +train for Ackford. I will drive over for you. Answer." +</P> + +<BR> + +<P> +There was no train before the six-fifteen by which the champion could +come directly to our village; but Ackford, a small town about three +miles distant, was on another railroad, on which there were frequent +afternoon trains. +</P> + +<P> +The champion answered: +</P> + +<BR> + +<P> +"All right. Meet me." +</P> + +<BR> + +<P> +Then Pepton rushed to our livery stable, hired a horse and buggy, and +drove to Ackford. +</P> + +<P> +A little after half-past six, when several of us were beginning to +think that Pepton had failed in his plans, he drove rapidly into the +grounds, making a very short turn at the gate, and pulled up his +panting horse just in time to avoid running over three ladies, who were +seated on the grass. The champion was by his side! +</P> + +<P> +The latter lost no time in talking or salutations. He knew what he had +been brought there to do, and he immediately set about trying to do it. +He took Pepton's bow, which the latter urged upon him. He stood up, +straight and firm on the line, at thirty-five yards from the +gentlemen's target; he carefully selected his arrows, examining the +feathers and wiping away any bit of soil that might be adhering to the +points after some one had shot them into the turf; with vigorous arm he +drew each arrow to its head; he fixed his eyes and his whole mind on +the centre of the target; he shot his twenty-four arrows, handed to +him, one by one, by Pepton, and he made a score of ninety-one. +</P> + +<P> +The whole club had been scoring the shots, as they were made, and when +the last arrow plumped into the red ring, a cheer arose from every +member excepting three: the champion, the president, and O. J. +Hollingsworth. But Pepton cheered loudly enough to make up these +deficiencies. +</P> + +<P> +"What in the mischief did they cheer him for?" asked Hollingsworth of +me. "They didn't cheer me when I beat everybody on the grounds an hour +ago. And it's no new thing for him to win the badge; he does it every +time." +</P> + +<P> +"Well," said I, frankly, "I think the club, AS a club, objects to your +wearing the badge, because you don't know how to shoot." +</P> + +<P> +"Don't know how to shoot!" he cried. "Why, I can hit the target better +than any of you. Isn't that what you try to do when you shoot?" +</P> + +<P> +"Yes," said I, "of course that is what we try to do. But we try to do +it in the proper way." +</P> + +<P> +"Proper grandmother!" he exclaimed. "It doesn't seem to help you much. +The best thing you fellows can do is to learn to shoot my way, and then +perhaps you may be able to hit oftener." +</P> + +<P> +When the champion had finished shooting he went home to his dinner, but +many of us stood about, talking over our great escape. +</P> + +<P> +"I feel as if I had done that myself," said Pepton. "I am almost as +proud as if I had shot—well, not an eagle, but a soaring lark." +</P> + +<P> +"Why, that ought to make you prouder than the other," said I, "for a +lark, especially when it's soaring, must be a good deal harder to hit +than an eagle." +</P> + +<P> +"That's so," said Pepton, reflectively. "But I'll stick to the lark. +I'm proud." +</P> + +<P> +During the next month our style of archery improved very much, so much, +indeed, that we increased our distance, for gentlemen, to forty yards, +and that for ladies to thirty, and also had serious thoughts of +challenging the Ackford club to a match. But as this was generally +understood to be a crack club, we finally determined to defer our +challenge until the next season. +</P> + +<P> +When I say we improved, I do not mean all of us. I do not mean Miss +Rosa. Although her attitudes were as fine as ever, and every motion as +true to rule as ever, she seldom made a hit. Pepton actually did try +to teach her how to aim, but the various methods of pointing the arrow +which he suggested resulted in such wild shooting that the boys who +picked up the arrows never dared to stick the points of their noses +beyond their boarded barricade during Miss Rosa's turns at the target. +But she was not discouraged, and Pepton often assured her that if she +would keep up a good heart, and practise regularly, she would get the +badge yet. As a rule, Pepton was so honest and truthful that a little +statement of this kind, especially under the circumstances, might be +forgiven him. +</P> + +<P> +One day Pepton came to me and announced that he had made a discovery. +</P> + +<P> +"It's about archery," he said, "and I don't mind telling you, because I +know you will not go about telling everybody else, and also because I +want to see you succeed as an archer." +</P> + +<P> +I am very much obliged," I said, "and what is the discovery?"<BR> +</P> + +<P> +"It's this," he answered. "When you draw your bow, bring the nock of +your arrow"—he was always very particular about technical terms—"well +up to your ear. Having done that, don't bother any more about your +right hand. It has nothing to do with the correct pointing of your +arrow, for it must be kept close to your right ear, just as if it were +screwed there. Then with your left hand bring around the bow so that +your fist—with the arrow-head, which is resting on top of it—shall +point, as nearly as you can make it, directly at the centre of the +target. Then let fly, and ten to one you'll make a hit. Now, what do +you think of that for a discovery? I've thoroughly tested the plan, +and it works splendidly." +</P> + +<P> +"I think," said I, "that you have discovered the way in which good +archers shoot. You have stated the correct method of managing a bow +and arrow." +</P> + +<P> +"Then you don't think it's an original method with me?" +</P> + +<P> +"Certainly not," I answered. +</P> + +<P> +"But it's the correct way?" +</P> + +<P> +"There's no doubt of that," said I. +</P> + +<P> +"Well," said Pepton, "then I shall make it my way." +</P> + +<P> +He did so, and the consequence was that one day, when the champion +happened to be away, Pepton won the badge. When the result was +announced, we were all surprised, but none so much so as Pepton +himself. He had been steadily improving since he had adopted a good +style of shooting, but he had had no idea that he would that day be +able to win the badge. +</P> + +<P> +When our president pinned the emblem of success upon the lapel of his +coat, Pepton turned pale, and then he flushed. He thanked the +president, and was about to thank the ladies and gentlemen; but +probably recollecting that we had had nothing to do with it,—unless, +indeed, we had shot badly on his behalf,—he refrained. He said +little, but I could see that he was very proud and very happy. There +was but one drawback to his triumph: +</P> + +<P> +Miss Rosa was not there. She was a very regular attendant, but for +some reason she was absent on this momentous afternoon. I did not say +anything to him on the subject, but I knew he felt this absence deeply. +</P> + +<P> +But this cloud could not wholly overshadow his happiness. He walked +home alone, his face beaming, his eyes sparkling, and his good bow +under his arm. +</P> + +<P> +That evening I called on him, for I thought that when he had cooled +down a little he would like to talk over the affair. But he was not +in. Miss Maria said that he had gone out as soon as he had finished +his dinner, which he had hurried through in a way which would certainly +injure his digestion if he kept up the practice; and dinner was late, +too, for they waited for him, and the archery meeting lasted a long +time today; and it really was not right for him to stay out after the +dew began to fall with only ordinary shoes on, for what's the good of +knowing how to shoot a bow and arrow, if you're laid up in your bed +with rheumatism or disease of the lungs? Good old lady! She would +have kept Pepton in a green baize bag, had such a thing been possible. +</P> + +<P> +The next morning, full two hours before church-time, Pepton called on +me. His face was still beaming. I could not help smiling. +</P> + +<P> +"Your happiness lasts well," I said. +</P> + +<P> +"Lasts!" he exclaimed. "Why shouldn't it last!" +</P> + +<P> +"There's no reason why it should not—at least, for a week," I said, +"and even longer, if you repeat your success." +</P> + +<P> +I did not feel so much like congratulating Pepton as I had on the +previous evening. I thought he was making too much of his +badge-winning. +</P> + +<P> +"Look here!" said Pepton, seating himself, and drawing his chair close +to me, "you are shooting wild—very wild indeed. You don't even see +the target. Let me tell you something. Last evening I went to see +Miss Rosa. She was delighted at my success. I had not expected this. +I thought she would be pleased, but not to such a degree. Her +congratulations were so warm that they set me on fire." +</P> + +<P> +"They must have been very warm indeed," I remarked. +</P> + +<P> +"`Miss Rosa,' said I," continued Pepton, without regarding my +interruption, "`it has been my fondest hope to see you wear the badge.' +`But I never could get it, you know,' she said. `You have got it,' I +exclaimed. `Take this. I won it for you. Make me happy by wearing +it.' `I can't do that,' she said. `That is a gentleman's badge.' +`Take it,' I cried, `gentleman and all!' +</P> + +<P> +I can't tell you all that happened after that," continued<BR> +Pepton. "You know, it wouldn't do. It is enough to say that she wears +the badge. And we are both her own—the badge and I!" +</P> + +<P> +Now I congratulated him in good earnest. There was a reason for it. +</P> + +<P> +"I don't owe a snap now for shooting an eagle," said Pepton, springing +to his feet and striding up and down the floor. "Let 'em all fly free +for me. I have made the most glorious shot that man could make. I +have hit the gold—hit it fair in the very centre! And what's more, +I've knocked it clean out of the target! Nobody else can ever make +such a shot. The rest of you fellows will have to be content to hit +the red, the blue, the black, or the white. The gold is mine!" +</P> + +<P> +I called on the old ladies, some time after this, and found them alone. +They were generally alone in the evenings now. We talked about +Pepton's engagement, and I found them resigned. They were sorry to +lose him, but they wanted him to be happy. +</P> + +<P> +"We have always known," said Miss Martha, with a little sigh, "that we +must die, and that he must get married. But we don't intend to repine. +These things will come to people." And her little sigh was followed by +a smile, still smaller. +</P> + +<BR><BR><BR><BR> + + + + + + + + +<pre> + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's The Magic Egg and Other Stories, by Frank Stockton + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MAGIC EGG AND OTHER STORIES *** + +***** This file should be named 429-h.htm or 429-h.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/4/2/429/ + + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Magic Egg and Other Stories + +Author: Frank Stockton + +Release Date: February 3, 2008 [EBook #429] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MAGIC EGG AND OTHER STORIES *** + + + + + + + + + +THE MAGIC EGG + +AND OTHER STORIES + + +BY + +FRANK R. STOCKTON + + + + +CONTENTS + + + THE MAGIC EGG + "HIS WIFE'S DECEASED SISTER" + THE WIDOW'S CRUISE + CAPTAIN ELI'S BEST EAR + LOVE BEFORE BREAKFAST + THE STAYING POWER OF SIR ROHAN + A PIECE OF RED CALICO + THE CHRISTMAS WRECK + MY WELL AND WHAT CAME OUT OF IT + MR. TOLMAN + MY UNWILLING NEIGHBOR + OUR ARCHERY CLUB + + + + +THE MAGIC EGG + +The pretty little theatre attached to the building of the Unicorn Club +had been hired for a certain January afternoon by Mr. Herbert Loring, +who wished to give therein a somewhat novel performance, to which he +had invited a small audience consisting entirely of friends and +acquaintances. + +Loring was a handsome fellow about thirty years old, who had travelled +far and studied much. He had recently made a long sojourn in the far +East, and his friends had been invited to the theatre to see some of +the wonderful things he had brought from that country of wonders. As +Loring was a club-man, and belonged to a family of good social +standing, his circle of acquaintances was large, and in this circle a +good many unpleasant remarks had been made regarding the proposed +entertainment--made, of course, by the people who had not been invited +to be present. Some of the gossip on the subject had reached Loring, +who did not hesitate to say that he could not talk to a crowd, and that +he did not care to show the curious things he had collected to people +who would not thoroughly appreciate them. He had been very particular +in regard to his invitations. + +At three o'clock on the appointed afternoon nearly all the people who +had been invited to the Unicorn Theatre were in their seats. No one +had stayed away except for some very good reason, for it was well known +that if Herbert Loring offered to show anything it was worth seeing. + +About forty people were present, who sat talking to one another, or +admiring the decoration of the theatre. As Loring stood upon the +stage--where he was entirely alone, his exhibition requiring no +assistants--he gazed through a loophole in the curtain upon a very +interesting array of faces. There were the faces of many men and women +of society, of students, of workers in various fields of thought, and +even of idlers in all fields of thought; but there was not one which +indicated a frivolous or listless disposition. The owners of those +faces had come to see something, and they wished to see it. + +For a quarter of an hour after the time announced for the opening of +the exhibition Loring peered through the hole in the curtain, and then, +although all the people he had expected had not arrived, he felt it +would not do for him to wait any longer. The audience was composed of +well-bred and courteous men and women, but despite their polite +self-restraint Loring could see that some of them were getting tired of +waiting. So, very reluctantly, and feeling that further delay was +impossible, he raised the curtain and came forward on the stage. + +Briefly he announced that the exhibition would open with some fireworks +he had brought from Corea. It was plain to see that the statement that +fireworks were about to be set off on a theatre stage, by an amateur, +had rather startled some of the audience, and Loring hastened to +explain that these were not real fireworks, but that they were +contrivances made of colored glass, which were illuminated by the +powerful lens of a lantern which was placed out of sight, and while the +apparent pyrotechnic display would resemble fireworks of strange and +grotesque designs, it would be absolutely without danger. He brought +out some little bunches of bits of colored glass, hung them at some +distance apart on a wire which was stretched across the stage just high +enough for him to reach it, and then lighted his lantern, which he +placed in one of the wings, lowered all the lights in the theatre, and +began his exhibition. + +As Loring turned his lantern on one of the clusters of glass lenses, +strips, and points, and, unseen himself, caused them to move by means +of long cords attached, the effects were beautiful and marvellous. +Little wheels of colored fire rapidly revolved, miniature rockets +appeared to rise a few feet and to explode in the air, and while all +the ordinary forms of fireworks were produced on a diminutive scale, +there were some effects that were entirely novel to the audience. As +the light was turned successively upon one and another of the clusters +of glass, sometimes it would flash along the whole line so rapidly that +all the various combinations of color and motion seemed to be combined +in one, and then for a time each particular set of fireworks would +blaze, sparkle, and coruscate by itself, scattering particles of +colored light as if they had been real sparks of fire. + +This curious and beautiful exhibition of miniature pyrotechnics was +extremely interesting to the audience, who gazed upward with rapt and +eager attention at the line of wheels, stars, and revolving spheres. +So far as interest gave evidence of satisfaction, there was never a +better satisfied audience. At first there had been some hushed murmurs +of pleasure, but very soon the attention of every one seemed so +completely engrossed by the dazzling display that they simply gazed in +silence. + +For twenty minutes or longer the glittering show went on, and not a +sign of weariness or inattention was made by any one of the assembled +company. Then gradually the colors of the little fireworks faded, the +stars and wheels revolved more slowly, the lights in the body of the +theatre were gradually raised, and the stage curtain went softly down. + +Anxiously, and a little pale, Herbert Loring peered through the +loophole in the curtain. It was not easy to judge of the effects of +his exhibition, and he did not know whether or not it had been a +success. There was no applause, but, on the other hand, there was no +signs that any one resented the exhibition as a childish display of +colored lights. It was impossible to look upon that audience without +believing that they had been thoroughly interested in what they had +seen, and that they expected to see more. + +For two or three minutes Loring gazed through his loophole, and then, +still with some doubt in his heart, but with a little more color in his +checks, he prepared for the second part of his performance. + +At this moment there entered the theatre, at the very back of the +house, a young lady. She was handsome and well dressed, and as she +opened the door--Loring had employed no ushers or other assistants in +this little social performance--she paused for a moment and looked into +the theatre, and then noiselessly stepped to a chair in the back row +and sat down. + +This was Edith Starr, who, a month before, had been betrothed to +Herbert Loring. Edith and her mother had been invited to this +performance, and front seats had been reserved for them, for each guest +had received a numbered card. But Mrs. Starr had a headache, and could +not go out that afternoon, and for a time her daughter had thought that +she, too, must give up the pleasure Loring had promised her, and stay +with her mother. But when the elder lady dropped into a quiet sleep, +Edith thought that, late as it was, she would go by herself, and see +what she could of the performance. + +She was quite certain that if her presence were known to Loring he +would stop whatever he was doing until she had been provided with a +seat which he thought suitable for her, for he had made a point of her +being properly seated when he gave the invitations. Therefore, being +equally desirous of not disturbing the performance and of not being +herself conspicuous, she sat behind two rather large men, where she +could see the stage perfectly well, but where she herself would not be +likely to be seen. + +In a few moments the curtain rose, and Loring came forward, carrying a +small, light table, which he placed near the front of the stage, and +for a moment stood quietly by it. Edith noticed upon his face the +expression of uncertainty and anxiety which had not yet left it. +Standing by the side of the table, and speaking very slowly, but so +clearly that his words could be heard distinctly in all parts of the +room, he began some introductory remarks regarding the second part of +his performance. + +"The extraordinary, and I may say marvellous, thing which I am about to +show you," he said, "is known among East Indian magicians as the magic +egg. The exhibition is a very uncommon one, and has seldom been seen +by Americans or Europeans, and it was by a piece of rare good fortune +that I became possessed of the appliances necessary for this +exhibition. They are indeed very few and simple, but never before, to +the best of my knowledge and belief, have they been seen outside of +India. + +"I will now get the little box which contains the articles necessary +for this magical performance, and I will say that if I had time to tell +you of the strange and amazing adventure which resulted in my +possession of this box, I am sure you would be as much interested in +that as I expect you to be in the contents of the box. But in order +that none of you may think this is an ordinary trick, executed by means +of concealed traps or doors, I wish you to take particular notice of +this table, which is, as you see, a plain, unpainted pine table, with +nothing but a flat top, and four straight legs at the corners. You can +see under and around it, and it gives no opportunity to conceal +anything." Then, standing for a few moments as if he had something else +to say, he turned and stepped toward one of the wings. + +Edith was troubled as she looked at her lover during these remarks. +Her interest was great, greater, indeed, than that of the people about +her, but it was not a pleasant interest. As Loring stopped speaking, +and looked about him, there was a momentary flush on his face. She +knew this was caused by excitement, and she was pale from the same +cause. + +Very soon Loring came forward, and stood by the table. + +"Here is the box," he said, "of which I spoke, and as I hold it up I +think you all can see it. It is not large, being certainly not more +than twelve inches in length and two deep, but it contains some very +wonderful things. The outside of this box is covered with delicate +engraving and carving which you cannot see, and these marks and lines +have, I think, some magical meaning, but I do not know what it is. I +will now open the box and show you what is inside. The first thing I +take out is this little stick, not thicker than a lead-pencil, but +somewhat longer, as you see. This is a magical wand, and is covered +with inscriptions of the same character as those on the outside of the +box. The next thing is this little red bag, well filled, as you see, +which I shall put on the table, for I shall not yet need it. + +"Now I take out a piece of cloth which is folded into a very small +compass, but as I unfold it you will perceive that it is more than a +foot square, and is covered with embroidery. All those strange lines +and figures in gold and red, which you can plainly see on the cloth as +I hold it up, are also characters in the same magic language as those +on the box and wand. I will now spread the cloth on the table, and +then take out the only remaining thing in the box, and this is nothing +in the world but an egg--a simple, ordinary hen's egg, as you all see +as I hold it up. It may be a trifle larger than an ordinary egg, but +then, after all, it is nothing but a common egg--that is, in +appearance. In reality it is a good deal more. + +"Now I will begin the performance." And as he stood by the back of the +table, over which he had been slightly bending, and threw his eyes over +the audience, his voice was stronger, and his face had lost all its +pallor. He was evidently warming up with his subject. + +"I now take up this wand," he said, "which, while I hold it, gives me +power to produce the phenomena which you are about to behold. You may +not all believe that there is any magic whatever about this little +performance, and that it is all a bit of machinery; but whatever you +may think about it, you shall see what you shall see. + +"Now with this wand I gently touch this egg which is lying on the +square of cloth. I do not believe you can see what has happened to +this egg, but I will tell you. There is a little line, like a hair, +entirely around it. Now that line has become a crack. Now you can see +it, I know. It grows wider and wider! Look! The shell of the egg is +separating in the middle. The whole egg slightly moves. Do you notice +that? Now you can see something yellow showing itself between the two +parts of the shell. See! It is moving a good deal, and the two halves +of the shell are separating more and more. And now out tumbles this +queer little object. Do you see what it is? It is a poor, weak, +little chick, not able to stand, but alive--alive! You can all +perceive that it is alive. Now you can see that it is standing on its +feet, feebly enough, but still standing. + +"Behold, it takes a few steps! You cannot doubt that it is alive, and +came out of that egg. It is beginning to walk about over the cloth. +Do you notice that it is picking the embroidery? Now, little chick, I +will give you something to eat. This little red bag contains grain, a +magical grain, with which I shall feed the chicken. You must excuse my +awkwardness in opening the bag, as I still hold the wand; but this +little stick I must not drop. See, little chick, there are some +grains! They look like rice, but, in fact, I have no idea what they +are. But he knows, he knows! Look at him! See how he picks it up! +There! He has swallowed one, two, three. That will do, little chick, +for a first meal. + +"The grain seems to have strengthened him already, for see how lively +he is, and how his yellow down stands out on him, so puffy and warm! +You are looking for some more grain, are you? Well, you cannot have it +just yet, and keep away from those pieces of eggshell, which, by the +way, I will put back into the box. Now, sir, try to avoid the edge of +the table, and, to quiet you, I will give you a little tap on the back +with my wand. Now, then, please observe closely. The down which just +now covered him has almost gone. He is really a good deal bigger, and +ever so much uglier. See the little pin-feathers sticking out over +him! Some spots here and there are almost bare, but he is ever so much +more active. Ha! Listen to that! He is so strong that you can hear +his beak as he pecks at the table. He is actually growing bigger and +bigger before our very eyes! See that funny little tail, how it begins +to stick up, and quills are showing at the end of his wings. + +"Another tap, and a few more grains. Careful, sir! Don't tear the +cloth! See how rapidly he grows! He is fairly covered with feathers, +red and black, with a tip of yellow in front. You could hardly get +that fellow into an ostrich egg! Now, then, what do you think of him? +He is big enough for a broiler, though I don't think any one would want +to take him for that purpose. Some more grain, and another tap from my +wand. See! He does not mind the little stick, for he has been used to +it from his very birth. Now, then, he is what you would call a good +half-grown chick. Rather more than half grown, I should say. Do you +notice his tail? There is no mistaking him for a pullet. The long +feathers are beginning to curl over already. He must have a little +more grain. Look out, sir, or you will be off the table! Come back +here! This table is too small for him, but if he were on the floor you +could not see him so well. + +"Another tap. Now see that comb on the top of his head; you scarcely +noticed it before, and now it is bright red. And see his spurs +beginning to show--on good thick legs, too. There is a fine young +fellow for you! Look how he jerks his head from side to side, like the +young prince of a poultry-yard, as he well deserves to be!" + +The attentive interest which had at first characterized the audience +now changed to excited admiration and amazement. Some leaned forward +with mouths wide open. Others stood up so that they could see better. +Ejaculations of astonishment and wonder were heard on every side, and a +more thoroughly fascinated and absorbed audience was never seen. + +"Now, my friends," Loring continued, "I will give this handsome fowl +another tap. Behold the result--a noble, full-grown cock! Behold his +spurs! They are nearly an inch long! See, there is a comb for you! +And what a magnificent tail of green and black, contrasting so finely +with the deep red of the rest of his body! Well, sir, you are truly +too big for this table. As I cannot give you more room, I will set you +up higher. Move over a little, and I will set this chair on the table. +There! Upon the seat! That's right, but don't stop. There is the +back, which is higher yet! Up with you! Ha! There, he nearly upset +the chair, but I will hold it. See! He has turned around. Now, then, +look at him. See his wings as he flaps them! He could fly with such +wings. Look at him! See that swelling breast! Ha, ha! Listen! Did +you ever hear a crow like that? It fairly rings through the house. +Yes, I knew it! There is another!" + +At this point the people in the house were in a state of wild +excitement. Nearly all of them were on their feet, and they were in +such a condition of frantic enthusiasm that Loring was afraid some of +them might make a run for the stage. + +"Come, sir," cried Loring, now almost shouting, "that will do. You +have shown us the strength of your lungs. Jump down on the seat of the +chair; now on the table. There, I will take away the chair, and you +can stand for a moment on the table and let our friends look at you; +but only for a moment. Take that tap on your back. Now do you see any +difference? Perhaps you may not, but I do. Yes, I believe you all do. +He is not the big fellow he was a minute ago. He is really +smaller--only a fine cockerel. A nice tail that, but with none of the +noble sweep that it had a minute ago. No, don't try to get off the +table. You can't escape my wand. Another tap. Behold a half-grown +chicken, good to eat, but with not a crow in him. Hungry, are you? +But you need not pick at the table that way. You get no more grain, +but only this little tap. Ha, ha! What are you coming to? There is a +chicken barely feathered enough for us to tell what color he is going +to be. + +"Another tap will take still more of the conceit out of him. Look at +him! There are his pin-feathers, and his bare spots. Don't try to get +away; I can easily tap you again. Now then. Here is a lovely little +chick, fluffy with yellow down. He is active enough, but I shall quiet +him. One tap, and now what do you see? A poor, feeble chicken, +scarcely able to stand, with his down all packed close to him as if he +had been out in the rain. Ah, little chick, I will take the two halves +of the egg-shell from which you came, and put them on each side of you. +Come, now get in! I close them up. You are lost to view. There is +nothing to be seen but a crack around the shell! Now it has gone! +There, my friends; as I hold it on high, behold the magic egg, exactly +as it was when I first took it out of the box, into which I will place +it again, with the cloth and the wand and the little red bag, and shut +it up with a snap. I will let you take one more look at this box +before I put it away behind the scenes. Are you satisfied with what I +have shown you? Do you think it is really as wonderful as you supposed +it would be?" + +At these words the whole audience burst into riotous applause, during +which Loring disappeared, but he was back in a moment. + +"Thank you!" he cried, bowing low, and waving his arms before him in +the manner of an Eastern magician making a salaam. From side to side +he turned, bowing and thanking, and then, with a hearty "Good-by to +you; good-by to you all!" he stepped back and let down the curtain. + +For some moments the audience remained in their seats as if they were +expecting something more, and then they rose quietly and began to +disperse. Most of them were acquainted with one another, and there was +a good deal of greeting and talking as they went out of the theatre. + +When Loring was sure the last person had departed, he turned down the +lights, locked the door, and gave the key to the steward of the club. + +He walked to his home a happy man. His exhibition had been a perfect +success, with not a break or a flaw in it from beginning to end. + +"I feel," thought the young man, as he strode along, "as if I could fly +to the top of that steeple, and flap and crow until all the world heard +me." + +That evening, as was his daily custom, Herbert Loring called upon Miss +Starr. He found the young lady in the library. + +"I came in here," she said, "because I have a good deal to talk to you +about, and I do not want interruptions." + +With this arrangement the young man expressed his entire satisfaction, +and immediately began to inquire the cause of her absence from his +exhibition in the afternoon. + +"But I was there," said Edith. "You did not see me, but I was there. +Mother had a headache, and I went by myself." + +"You were there!" exclaimed Loring, almost starting from his chair. "I +don't understand. You were not in your seat." + + "No," answered Edith. "I was on the very back row of seats. +You could not see me, and I did not wish you to see me." + +"Edith!" exclaimed Loring, rising to his feet and leaning over the +library table, which was between them. "When did you come? How much +of the performance did you see?" + +"I was late," she said. "I did not arrive until after the fireworks, +or whatever they were." + +For a moment Loring was silent, as if he did not understand the +situation. + +"Fireworks!" he said. "How did you know there had been fireworks?" + +"I heard the people talking of them as they left the theatre," she +answered. + +"And what did they say?" he inquired quickly. + +"They seemed to like them very well," she replied, "but I do not think +they were quite satisfied. From what I heard some persons say, I +inferred that they thought it was not very much of a show to which you +had invited them." + +Again Loring stood in thought, looking down at the table. But before +he could speak again, Edith sprang to her feet. + +"Herbert Loring," she cried, "what does all this mean? I was there +during the whole of the exhibition of what you called the magic egg. I +saw all those people wild with excitement at the wonderful sight of the +chicken that came out of the egg, and grew to full size, and then +dwindled down again, and went back into the egg, and, Herbert, there +was no egg, and there was no little box, and there was no wand, and no +embroidered cloth, and there was no red bag, nor any little chick, and +there was no full-grown fowl, and there was no chair that you put on +the table! There was nothing, absolutely nothing, but you and that +table! Even the table was not what you said it was. It was not an +unpainted pine table with four straight legs. It was a table of dark +polished wood, and it stood on a single post with feet. There was +nothing there that you said was there. Everything was a sham and a +delusion; every word you spoke was untrue. And yet everybody in that +theatre, excepting you and me, saw all the things that you said were on +the stage. I know they saw them all, for I was with the people, and +heard them, and saw them, and at times I fairly felt the thrill of +enthusiasm which possessed them as they glared at the miracles and +wonders you said were happening." + +Loring smiled. "Sit down, my dear Edith," he said. "You are excited, +and there is not the slightest cause for it. I will explain the whole +affair to you. It is simple enough. You know that study is the great +object of my life. I study all sorts of things; and just now I am +greatly interested in hypnotism. The subject has become fascinating to +me. I have made a great many successful trials of my power, and the +affair of this afternoon was nothing but a trial of my powers on a more +extensive scale than anything I have yet attempted. I wanted to see if +it were possible for me to hypnotize a considerable number of people +without any one suspecting what I intended to do. The result was a +success. I hypnotized all those people by means of the first part of +my performance, which consisted of some combinations of colored glass +with lights thrown upon them. They revolved, and looked like +fireworks, and were strung on a wire high up on the stage. + +"I kept up the glittering and dazzling show--which was well worth +seeing, I can assure you--until the people had been straining their +eyes upward for almost half an hour. And this sort of thing--I will +tell you if you do not know it--is one of the methods of producing +hypnotic sleep. + +"There was no one present who was not an impressionable subject, for I +was very careful in sending out my invitations, and when I became +almost certain that my audience was thoroughly hypnotized, I stopped +the show and began the real exhibition, which was not really for their +benefit, but for mine. + +"Of course, I was dreadfully anxious for fear I had not succeeded +entirely, and that there might be at least some one person who had not +succumbed to the hypnotic influences, and so I tested the matter by +bringing out that table and telling them it was something it was not. +If I had had any reason for supposing that some of the audience saw the +table as it really was, I had an explanation ready, and I could have +retired from my position without any one supposing that I had intended +making hypnotic experiments. The rest of the exhibition would have +been some things that any one could see, and as soon as possible I +would have released from their spell those who were hypnotized. But +when I became positively assured that every one saw a light pine table +with four straight legs, I confidently went on with the performances of +the magic egg." + +Edith Starr was still standing by the library table. She had not +heeded Loring's advice to sit down, and she was trembling with emotion. + +"Herbert Loring," she said, "you invited my mother and me to that +exhibition. You gave us tickets for front seats, where we would be +certain to be hypnotized if your experiment succeeded, and you would +have made us see that false show, which faded from those people's minds +as soon as they recovered from the spell, for as they went away they +were talking only of the fireworks, and not one of them mentioned a +magic egg, or a chicken, or anything of the kind. Answer me this: did +you not intend that I should come and be put under that spell?" + +Loring smiled. "Yes," he said, "of course I did. But then your case +would have been different from that of the other spectators: I should +have explained the whole thing to you, and I am sure we would have had +a great deal of pleasure, and profit too, in discussing your +experiences. The subject is extremely--" + +"Explain to me!" she cried. "You would not have dared to do it! I do +not know how brave you may be, but I know you would not have had the +courage to come here and tell me that you had taken away my reason and +my judgment, as you took them away from all those people, and that you +had made me a mere tool of your will--glaring and panting with +excitement at the wonderful things you told me to see where nothing +existed. I have nothing to say about the others. They can speak for +themselves if they ever come to know what you did to them. I speak for +myself. I stood up with the rest of the people. I gazed with all my +power, and over and over again I asked myself if it could be possible +that anything was the matter with my eyes or my brain, and if I could +be the only person there who could not see the marvellous spectacle +that you were describing. But now I know that nothing was real, not +even the little pine table--not even the man!" + +"Not even me!" exclaimed Loring. "Surely I was real enough!" + +"On that stage, yes," she said. "But you there proved you were not the +Herbert Loring to whom I promised myself. He was an unreal being. If +he had existed he would not have been a man who would have brought me +to that public place, all ignorant of his intentions, to cloud my +perceptions, to subject my intellect to his own, and make me believe a +lie. If a man should treat me in that way once he would treat me so at +other times, and in other ways, if he had the chance. You have treated +me in the past as to-day you treated those people who glared at the +magic egg. In the days gone by you made me see an unreal man, but you +will never do it again! Good-by." + +"Edith," cried Loring, "you don't--" + +But she had disappeared through a side door, and he never spoke to her +again. + +Walking home through the dimly lighted streets, Loring involuntarily +spoke aloud. + +"And this," he said, "is what came out of the magic egg!" + + + + +"HIS WIFE'S DECEASED SISTER" + +It is now five years since an event occurred which so colored my life, +or rather so changed some of its original colors, that I have thought +it well to write an account of it, deeming that its lessons may be of +advantage to persons whose situations in life are similar to my own. + +When I was quite a young man I adopted literature as a profession, and +having passed through the necessary preparatory grades, I found myself, +after a good many years of hard and often unremunerative work, in +possession of what might be called a fair literary practice. My +articles, grave, gay, practical, or fanciful, had come to be considered +with a favor by the editors of the various periodicals for which I +wrote, on which I found in time I could rely with a very comfortable +certainty. My productions created no enthusiasm in the reading public; +they gave me no great reputation or very valuable pecuniary return; but +they were always accepted, and my receipts from them, at the time to +which I have referred, were as regular and reliable as a salary, and +quite sufficient to give me more than a comfortable support. + +It was at this time I married. I had been engaged for more than a +year, but had not been willing to assume the support of a wife until I +felt that my pecuniary position was so assured that I could do so with +full satisfaction to my own conscience. There was now no doubt in +regard to this position, either in my mind or in that of my wife. I +worked with great steadiness and regularity, I knew exactly where to +place the productions of my pen, and could calculate, with a fair +degree of accuracy, the sums I should receive for them. We were by no +means rich, but we had enough, and were thoroughly satisfied and +content. + +Those of my readers who are married will have no difficulty in +remembering the peculiar ecstasy of the first weeks of their wedded +life. It is then that the flowers of this world bloom brightest; that +its sun is the most genial; that its clouds are the scarcest; that its +fruit is the most delicious; that the air is the most balmy; that its +cigars are of the highest flavor; that the warmth and radiance of early +matrimonial felicity so rarefy the intellectual atmosphere that the +soul mounts higher, and enjoys a wider prospect, than ever before. + +These experiences were mine. The plain claret of my mind was changed +to sparkling champagne, and at the very height of its effervescence I +wrote a story. The happy thought that then struck me for a tale was of +a very peculiar character, and it interested me so much that I went to +work at it with great delight and enthusiasm, and finished it in a +comparatively short time. The title of the story was "His Wife's +Deceased Sister," and when I read it to Hypatia she was delighted with +it, and at times was so affected by its pathos that her uncontrollable +emotion caused a sympathetic dimness in my eyes which prevented my +seeing the words I had written. When the reading was ended and my wife +had dried her eyes, she turned to me and said, "This story will make +your fortune. There has been nothing so pathetic since Lamartine's +`History of a Servant Girl.'" + +As soon as possible the next day I sent my story to the editor of the +periodical for which I wrote most frequently, and in which my best +productions generally appeared. In a few days I had a letter from the +editor, in which he praised my story as he had never before praised +anything from my pen. It had interested and charmed, he said, not only +himself, but all his associates in the office. Even old Gibson, who +never cared to read anything until it was in proof, and who never +praised anything which had not a joke in it, was induced by the example +of the others to read this manuscript, and shed, as he asserted, the +first tears that had come from his eyes since his final paternal +castigation some forty years before. The story would appear, the +editor assured me, as soon as he could possibly find room for it. + + If anything could make our skies more genial, our flowers +brighter, and the flavor of our fruit and cigars more delicious, it was +a letter like this. And when, in a very short time, the story was +published, we found that the reading public was inclined to receive it +with as much sympathetic interest and favor as had been shown to it by +the editors. My personal friends soon began to express enthusiastic +opinions upon it. It was highly praised in many of the leading +newspapers, and, altogether, it was a great literary success. I am not +inclined to be vain of my writings, and, in general, my wife tells me, +I think too little of them. But I did feel a good deal of pride and +satisfaction in the success of "His Wife's Deceased Sister." If it did +not make my fortune, as my wife asserted it would, it certainly would +help me very much in my literary career. + +In less than a month from the writing of this story, something very +unusual and unexpected happened to me. A manuscript was returned by +the editor of the periodical in which "His Wife's Deceased Sister" had +appeared. + + +"It is a good story," he wrote, "but not equal to what you have just +done. You have made a great hit, and it would not do to interfere with +the reputation you have gained by publishing anything inferior to `His +Wife's Deceased Sister,' which has had such a deserved success." + + +I was so unaccustomed to having my work thrown back on my hands that I +think I must have turned a little pale when I read the letter. I said +nothing of the matter to my wife, for it would be foolish to drop such +grains of sand as this into the smoothly oiled machinery of our +domestic felicity, but I immediately sent the story to another editor. +I am not able to express the astonishment I felt when, in the course of +a week, it was sent back to me. The tone of the note accompanying it +indicated a somewhat injured feeling on the part of the editor. + + +"I am reluctant," he said, "to decline a manuscript from you; but you +know very well that if you sent me anything like `His Wife's Deceased +Sister' it would be most promptly accepted." + +I now felt obliged to speak of the affair to my wife, who was quite as +much surprised, though, perhaps, not quite as much shocked, as I had +been. + +"Let us read the story again," she said, "and see what is the matter +with it." When we had finished its perusal, Hypatia remarked: "It is +quite as good as many of the stories you have had printed, and I think +it very interesting, although, of course, it is not equal to `His +Wife's Deceased Sister.'" + +"Of course not," said I; "that was an inspiration that I cannot expect +every day. But there must be something wrong about this last story +which we do not perceive. Perhaps my recent success may have made me a +little careless in writing it." + +"I don't believe that," said Hypatia. + +"At any rate," I continued, "I will lay it aside, and will go to work +on a new one." + +In due course of time I had another manuscript finished, and I sent it +to my favorite periodical. It was retained some weeks, and then came +back to me. + +"It will never do," the editor wrote, quite warmly, "for you to go +backward. The demand for the number containing `His Wife's Deceased +Sister' still continues, and we do not intend to let you disappoint +that great body of readers who would be so eager to see another number +containing one of your stories." + + +I sent this manuscript to four other periodicals, and from each of them +it was returned with remarks to the effect that, although it was not a +bad story in itself, it was not what they would expect from the author +of "His Wife's Deceased Sister." + +The editor of a Western magazine wrote to me for a story to be +published in a special number which he would issue for the holidays. I +wrote him one of the character and length he desired, and sent it to +him. By return mail it came back to me. + + +"I had hoped," the editor wrote, "when I asked for a story from your +pen, to receive something like `His Wife's Deceased Sister,' and I must +own that I am very much disappointed." + + +I was so filled with anger when I read this note that I openly +objurgated "His Wife's Deceased Sister." "You must excuse me," I said +to my astonished wife, "for expressing myself thus in your presence, +but that confounded story will be the ruin of me yet. Until it is +forgotten nobody will ever take anything I write." + +"And you cannot expect it ever to be forgotten," said Hypatia, with +tears in her eyes. + +It is needless for me to detail my literary efforts in the course of +the next few months. The ideas of the editors with whom my principal +business had been done, in regard to my literary ability, had been so +raised by my unfortunate story of "His Wife's Deceased Sister" that I +found it was of no use to send them anything of lesser merit. And as +to the other journals which I tried, they evidently considered it an +insult for me to send them matter inferior to that by which my +reputation had lately risen. The fact was that my successful story had +ruined me. My income was at an end, and want actually stared me in the +face; and I must admit that I did not like the expression of its +countenance. It was of no use for me to try to write another story +like "His Wife's Deceased Sister." I could not get married every time +I began a new manuscript, and it was the exaltation of mind caused by +my wedded felicity which produced that story. + +"It's perfectly dreadful!" said my wife. "If I had had a sister, and +she had died, I would have thought it was my fault." + +"It could not be your fault," I answered, "and I do not think it was +mine. I had no intention of deceiving anybody into the belief that I +could do that sort of thing every time, and it ought not to be expected +of me. Suppose Raphael's patrons had tried to keep him screwed up to +the pitch of the Sistine Madonna, and had refused to buy anything which +was not as good as that. In that case I think he would have occupied a +much earlier and narrower grave than the one on which Mr. Morris Moore +hangs his funeral decorations." + +"But, my dear," said Hypatia, who was posted on such subjects, "the +Sistine Madonna was one of his latest paintings." + +"Very true," said I. "But if he had married as I did, he would have +painted it earlier." + +I was walking homeward one afternoon about this time, when I met +Barbel, a man I had known well in my early literary career. He was now +about fifty years of age, but looked older. His hair and beard were +quite gray, and his clothes, which were of the same general hue, gave +me the idea that they, like his hair, had originally been black. Age +is very hard on a man's external appointments. Barbel had an air of +having been to let for a long time, and quite out of repair. But there +was a kindly gleam in his eye, and he welcomed me cordially. + +"Why, what is the matter, old fellow?" said he. "I never saw you look +so woe-begone." + +I had no reason to conceal anything from Barbel. In my younger days he +had been of great use to me, and he had a right to know the state of my +affairs. I laid the whole case plainly before him. + +"Look here," he said, when I had finished; "come with me to my room; I +have something I would like to say to you there." + +I followed Barbel to his room. It was at the top of a very dirty and +well-worn house, which stood in a narrow and lumpy street, into which +few vehicles ever penetrated, except the ash and garbage-carts, and the +rickety wagons of the venders of stale vegetables. + +"This is not exactly a fashionable promenade," said Barbel, as we +approached the house, "but in some respects it reminds me of the +streets in Italian towns, where the palaces lean over toward each other +in such a friendly way." + +Barbel's room was, to my mind, rather more doleful than the street. It +was dark, it was dusty, and cobwebs hung from every corner. The few +chairs upon the floor and the books upon a greasy table seemed to be +afflicted with some dorsal epidemic, for their backs were either gone +or broken. A little bedstead in the corner was covered with a spread +made of New York "Heralds" with their edges pasted together. + +"There is nothing better," said Barbel, noticing my glance toward this +novel counterpane, "for a bed-covering than newspapers; they keep you +as warm as a blanket, and are much lighter. I used to use `Tribunes,' +but they rattled too much." + +The only part of the room which was well lighted was one end near the +solitary window. Here, upon a table with a spliced leg, stood a little +grindstone. + +"At the other end of the room," said Barbel, "is my cook-stove, which +you can't see unless I light the candle in the bottle which stands by +it. But if you don't care particularly to examine it, I won't go to +the expense of lighting up. You might pick up a good many odd pieces +of bric-a-brac, around here, if you chose to strike a match and +investigate. But I would not advise you to do so. It would pay better +to throw the things out of the window than to carry them down-stairs. +The particular piece of indoor decoration to which I wish to call your +attention is this." And he led me to a little wooden frame which hung +against the wall near the window. Behind a dusty piece of glass it +held what appeared to be a leaf from a small magazine or journal. +"There," said he, "you see a page from the `Grasshopper,' a humorous +paper which flourished in this city some half-dozen years ago. I used +to write regularly for that paper, as you may remember." + +"Oh, yes, indeed!" I exclaimed. "And I shall never forget your +`Conundrum of the Anvil' which appeared in it. How often have I +laughed at that most wonderful conceit, and how often have I put it to +my friends!" + +Barbel gazed at me silently for a moment, and then he pointed to the +frame. "That printed page," he said solemnly, "contains the `Conundrum +of the Anvil.' I hang it there so that I can see it while I work. +That conundrum ruined me. It was the last thing I wrote for the +`Grasshopper.' How I ever came to imagine it, I cannot tell. It is +one of those things which occur to a man but once in a lifetime. After +the wild shout of delight with which the public greeted that conundrum, +my subsequent efforts met with hoots of derision. The `Grasshopper' +turned its hind legs upon me. I sank from bad to worse,--much +worse,--until at last I found myself reduced to my present occupation, +which is that of grinding points on pins. By this I procure my bread, +coffee, and tobacco, and sometimes potatoes and meat. One day while I +was hard at work, an organ-grinder came into the street below. He +played the serenade from `Trovatore' and the familiar notes brought +back visions of old days and old delights, when the successful writer +wore good clothes and sat at operas, when he looked into sweet eyes and +talked of Italian airs, when his future appeared all a succession of +bright scenery and joyous acts, without any provision for a +drop-curtain. And as my ear listened, and my mind wandered in this +happy retrospect, my every faculty seemed exalted, and, without any +thought upon the matter, I ground points upon my pins so fine, so +regular, and so smooth that they would have pierced with ease the +leather of a boot, or slipped, without abrasion, among the finest +threads of rare old lace. When the organ stopped, and I fell back into +my real world of cobwebs and mustiness, I gazed upon the pins I had +just ground, and, without a moment's hesitation, I threw them into the +street, and reported the lot as spoiled. This cost me a little money, +but it saved me my livelihood." + +After a few moments of silence, Barbel resumed: + +"I have no more to say to you, my young friend. All I want you to do +is to look upon that framed conundrum, then upon this grindstone, and +then to go home and reflect. As for me, I have a gross of pins to +grind before the sun goes down." + +I cannot say that my depression of mind was at all relieved by what I +had seen and heard. I had lost sight of Barbel for some years, and I +had supposed him still floating on the sun-sparkling stream of +prosperity where I had last seen him. It was a great shock to me to +find him in such a condition of poverty and squalor, and to see a man +who had originated the "Conundrum of the Anvil" reduced to the +soul-depressing occupation of grinding pin-points. As I walked and +thought, the dreadful picture of a totally eclipsed future arose before +my mind. The moral of Barbel sank deep into my heart. + +When I reached home I told my wife the story of my friend Barbel. She +listened with a sad and eager interest. + +"I am afraid," she said, "if our fortunes do not quickly mend, that we +shall have to buy two little grindstones. You know I could help you at +that sort of thing." + +For a long time we sat together and talked, and devised many plans for +the future. I did not think it necessary yet for me to look out for a +pin contract; but I must find some way of making money, or we should +starve to death. Of course, the first thing that suggested itself was +the possibility of finding some other business. But, apart from the +difficulty of immediately obtaining remunerative work in occupations to +which I had not been trained, I felt a great and natural reluctance to +give up a profession for which I had carefully prepared myself, and +which I had adopted as my life-work. It would be very hard for me to +lay down my pen forever, and to close the top of my inkstand upon all +the bright and happy fancies which I had seen mirrored in its tranquil +pool. We talked and pondered the rest of that day and a good deal of +the night, but we came to no conclusion as to what it would be best for +us to do. + +The next day I determined to go and call upon the editor of the journal +for which, in happier days, before the blight of "His Wife's Deceased +Sister" rested upon me, I used most frequently to write, and, having +frankly explained my condition to him, to ask his advice. The editor +was a good man, and had always been my friend. He listened with great +attention to what I told him, and evidently sympathized with me in my +trouble. + +"As we have written to you," he said, "the only reason why we did not +accept the manuscripts you sent us was that they would have +disappointed the high hopes that the public had formed in regard to +you. We have had letter after letter asking when we were going to +publish another story like `His Wife's Deceased Sister.' We felt, and +we still feel, that it would be wrong to allow you to destroy the fair +fabric which you yourself have raised. But," he added, with a kind +smile, "I see very plainly that your well-deserved reputation will be +of little advantage to you if you should starve at the moment that its +genial beams are, so to speak, lighting you up." + +"Its beams are not genial," I answered. "They have scorched and +withered me." + +"How would you like," said the editor, after a short reflection, "to +allow us to publish the stories you have recently written under some +other name than your own? That would satisfy us and the public, would +put money in your pocket, and would not interfere with your reputation." + +Joyfully I seized the noble fellow by the hand, and instantly accepted +his proposition. "Of course," said I, "a reputation is a very good +thing; but no reputation can take the place of food, clothes, and a +house to live in, and I gladly agree to sink my over-illumined name +into oblivion, and to appear before the public as a new and unknown +writer." + +"I hope that need not be for long," he said, "for I feel sure that you +will yet write stories as good as `His Wife's Deceased Sister.'" + +All the manuscripts I had on hand I now sent to my good friend the +editor, and in due and proper order they appeared in his journal under +the name of John Darmstadt, which I had selected as a substitute for my +own, permanently disabled. I made a similar arrangement with other +editors, and John Darmstadt received the credit of everything that +proceeded from my pen. Our circumstances now became very comfortable, +and occasionally we even allowed ourselves to indulge in little dreams +of prosperity. + +Time passed on very pleasantly. One year, another, and then a little +son was born to us. It is often difficult, I believe, for thoughtful +persons to decide whether the beginning of their conjugal career, or +the earliest weeks in the life of their first-born, be the happiest and +proudest period of their existence. For myself I can only say that the +same exaltation of mind, the same rarefication of idea and invention, +which succeeded upon my wedding day came upon me now. As then, my +ecstatic emotions crystallized themselves into a motive for a story, +and without delay I set myself to work upon it. My boy was about six +weeks old when the manuscript was finished, and one evening, as we sat +before a comfortable fire in our sitting-room, with the curtains drawn, +and the soft lamp lighted, and the baby sleeping soundly in the +adjoining chamber, I read the story to my wife. + +When I had finished, my wife arose and threw herself into my arms. "I +was never so proud of you," she said, her glad eyes sparkling, "as I am +at this moment. That is a wonderful story! It is, indeed I am sure it +is, just as good as `His Wife's Deceased Sister.'" + +As she spoke these words, a sudden and chilling sensation crept over us +both. All her warmth and fervor, and the proud and happy glow +engendered within me by this praise and appreciation from one I loved, +vanished in an instant. We stepped apart, and gazed upon each other +with pallid faces. In the same moment the terrible truth had flashed +upon us both. This story WAS as good as "His Wife's Deceased Sister"! + +We stood silent. The exceptional lot of Barbel's super-pointed pins +seemed to pierce our very souls. A dreadful vision rose before me of +an impending fall and crash, in which our domestic happiness should +vanish, and our prospects for our boy be wrecked, just as we had began +to build them up. + +My wife approached me, and took my hand in hers, which was as cold as +ice. "Be strong and firm," she said. "A great danger threatens us, +but you must brace yourself against it. Be strong and firm." + +I pressed her hand, and we said no more that night. + +The next day I took the manuscript I had just written, and carefully +infolded it in stout wrapping-paper. Then I went to a neighboring +grocery store and bought a small, strong, tin box, originally intended +for biscuit, with a cover that fitted tightly. In this I placed my +manuscript, and then I took the box to a tinsmith and had the top +fastened on with hard solder. When I went home I ascended into the +garret and brought down to my study a ship's cash-box, which had once +belonged to one of my family who was a sea-captain. This box was very +heavy, and firmly bound with iron, and was secured by two massive +locks. Calling my wife, I told her of the contents of the tin case, +which I then placed in the box, and having shut down the heavy lid, I +doubly locked it. + +"This key," said I, putting it in my pocket, "I shall throw into the +river when I go out this afternoon." + +My wife watched me eagerly, with a pallid and firm-set countenance, but +upon which I could see the faint glimmer of returning happiness. + +"Wouldn't it be well," she said, "to secure it still further by +sealing-wax and pieces of tape?" + +"No," said I. "I do not believe that any one will attempt to tamper +with our prosperity. And now, my dear," I continued in an impressive +voice, "no one but you, and, in the course of time, our son, shall know +that this manuscript exists. When I am dead, those who survive me may, +if they see fit, cause this box to be split open and the story +published. The reputation it may give my name cannot harm me then." + + + + +THE WIDOW'S CRUISE + +The Widow Ducket lived in a small village about ten miles from the New +Jersey sea-coast. In this village she was born, here she had married +and buried her husband, and here she expected somebody to bury her; but +she was in no hurry for this, for she had scarcely reached middle age. +She was a tall woman with no apparent fat in her composition, and full +of activity, both muscular and mental. + +She rose at six o'clock in the morning, cooked breakfast, set the +table, washed the dishes when the meal was over, milked, churned, +swept, washed, ironed, worked in her little garden, attended to the +flowers in the front yard, and in the afternoon knitted and quilted and +sewed, and after tea she either went to see her neighbors or had them +come to see her. When it was really dark she lighted the lamp in her +parlor and read for an hour, and if it happened to be one of Miss Mary +Wilkins's books that she read she expressed doubts as to the realism of +the characters therein described. + +These doubts she expressed to Dorcas Networthy, who was a small, plump +woman, with a solemn face, who had lived with the widow for many years +and who had become her devoted disciple. Whatever the widow did, that +also did Dorcas--not so well, for her heart told her she could never +expect to do that, but with a yearning anxiety to do everything as well +as she could. She rose at five minutes past six, and in a subsidiary +way she helped to get the breakfast, to eat it, to wash up the dishes, +to work in the garden, to quilt, to sew, to visit and receive, and no +one could have tried harder than she did to keep awake when the widow +read aloud in the evening. + +All these things happened every day in the summertime, but in the +winter the widow and Dorcas cleared the snow from their little front +path instead of attending to the flowers, and in the evening they +lighted a fire as well as a lamp in the parlor. + +Sometimes, however, something different happened, but this was not +often, only a few times in the year. One of the different things +occurred when Mrs. Ducket and Dorcas were sitting on their little front +porch one summer afternoon, one on the little bench on one side of the +door, and the other on the little bench on the other side of the door, +each waiting until she should hear the clock strike five, to prepare +tea. But it was not yet a quarter to five when a one-horse wagon +containing four men came slowly down the street. Dorcas first saw the +wagon, and she instantly stopped knitting. + +"Mercy on me!" she exclaimed. "Whoever those people are, they are +strangers here, and they don't know where to stop, for they first go to +one side of the street and then to the other." + +The widow looked around sharply. "Humph!" said she. "Those men are +sailormen. You might see that in a twinklin' of an eye. Sailormen +always drive that way, because that is the way they sail ships. They +first tack in one direction and then in another." + +"Mr. Ducket didn't like the sea?" remarked Dorcas, for about the three +hundredth time. + +"No, he didn't," answered the widow, for about the two hundred and +fiftieth time, for there had been occasions when she thought Dorcas put +this question inopportunely. "He hated it, and he was drowned in it +through trustin' a sailorman, which I never did nor shall. Do you +really believe those men are comin' here?" + +"Upon my word I do!" said Dorcas, and her opinion was correct. + +The wagon drew up in front of Mrs. Ducket's little white house, and the +two women sat rigidly, their hands in their laps, staring at the man +who drove. + +This was an elderly personage with whitish hair, and under his chin a +thin whitish beard, which waved in the gentle breeze and gave Dorcas +the idea that his head was filled with hair which was leaking out from +below. + +"Is this the Widow Ducket's?" inquired this elderly man, in a strong, +penetrating voice. + +"That's my name," said the widow, and laying her knitting on the bench +beside her, she went to the gate. Dorcas also laid her knitting on the +bench beside her and went to the gate. + +"I was told," said the elderly man, "at a house we touched at about a +quarter of a mile back, that the Widow Ducket's was the only house in +this village where there was any chance of me and my mates getting a +meal. We are four sailors, and we are making from the bay over to +Cuppertown, and that's eight miles ahead yet, and we are all pretty +sharp set for something to eat." + +"This is the place," said the widow, "and I do give meals if there is +enough in the house and everything comes handy." + +"Does everything come handy to-day?" said he. + +"It does," said she, "and you can hitch your horse and come in; but I +haven't got anything for him." + +"Oh, that's all right," said the man, "we brought along stores for him, +so we'll just make fast and then come in." + +The two women hurried into the house in a state of bustling +preparation, for the furnishing of this meal meant one dollar in cash. + +The four mariners, all elderly men, descended from the wagon, each one +scrambling with alacrity over a different wheel. + +A box of broken ship-biscuit was brought out and put on the ground in +front of the horse, who immediately set himself to eating with great +satisfaction. + +Tea was a little late that day, because there were six persons to +provide for instead of two, but it was a good meal, and after the four +seamen had washed their hands and faces at the pump in the back yard +and had wiped them on two towels furnished by Dorcas, they all came in +and sat down. Mrs. Ducket seated herself at the head of the table with +the dignity proper to the mistress of the house, and Dorcas seated +herself at the other end with the dignity proper to the disciple of the +mistress. No service was necessary, for everything that was to be +eaten or drunk was on the table. + +When each of the elderly mariners had had as much bread and butter, +quickly baked soda-biscuit, dried beef, cold ham, cold tongue, and +preserved fruit of every variety known, as his storage capacity would +permit, the mariner in command, Captain Bird, pushed back his chair, +whereupon the other mariners pushed back their chairs. + +"Madam," said Captain Bird, "we have all made a good meal, which didn't +need to be no better nor more of it, and we're satisfied; but that +horse out there has not had time to rest himself enough to go the eight +miles that lies ahead of us, so, if it's all the same to you and this +good lady, we'd like to sit on that front porch awhile and smoke our +pipes. I was a-looking at that porch when I came in, and I bethought +to myself what a rare good place it was to smoke a pipe in." + +"There's pipes been smoked there," said the widow, rising, "and it can +be done again. Inside the house I don't allow tobacco, but on the +porch neither of us minds." + + So the four captains betook themselves to the porch, two of +them seating themselves on the little bench on one side of the door, +and two of them on the little bench on the other side of the door, and +lighted their pipes. + +"Shall we clear off the table and wash up the dishes," said Dorcas, "or +wait until they are gone?" + +"We will wait until they are gone," said the widow, "for now that they +are here we might as well have a bit of a chat with them. When a +sailorman lights his pipe he is generally willin' to talk, but when he +is eatin' you can't get a word out of him." + +Without thinking it necessary to ask permission, for the house belonged +to her, the Widow Ducket brought a chair and put it in the hall close +to the open front door, and Dorcas brought another chair and seated +herself by the side of the widow. + +"Do all you sailormen belong down there at the bay?" asked Mrs. Ducket; +thus the conversation began, and in a few minutes it had reached a +point at which Captain Bird thought it proper to say that a great many +strange things happen to seamen sailing on the sea which lands-people +never dream of. + +"Such as anything in particular?" asked the widow, at which remark +Dorcas clasped her hands in expectancy. + +At this question each of the mariners took his pipe from his mouth and +gazed upon the floor in thought. + +"There's a good many strange things happened to me and my mates at sea. +Would you and that other lady like to hear any of them?" asked Captain +Bird. + +"We would like to hear them if they are true," said the widow. + +"There's nothing happened to me and my mates that isn't true," said +Captain Bird, "and here is something that once happened to me: I was +on a whaling v'yage when a big sperm-whale, just as mad as a fiery +bull, came at us, head on, and struck the ship at the stern with such +tremendous force that his head crashed right through her timbers and he +went nearly half his length into her hull. The hold was mostly filled +with empty barrels, for we was just beginning our v'yage, and when he +had made kindling-wood of these there was room enough for him. We all +expected that it wouldn't take five minutes for the vessel to fill and +go to the bottom, and we made ready to take to the boats; but it turned +out we didn't need to take to no boats, for as fast as the water rushed +into the hold of the ship, that whale drank it and squirted it up +through the two blow-holes in the top of his head, and as there was an +open hatchway just over his head, the water all went into the sea +again, and that whale kept working day and night pumping the water out +until we beached the vessel on the island of Trinidad--the whale +helping us wonderful on our way over by the powerful working of his +tail, which, being outside in the water, acted like a propeller. I +don't believe any thing stranger than that ever happened to a whaling +ship." + +"No," said the widow, "I don't believe anything ever did." + +Captain Bird now looked at Captain Sanderson, and the latter took his +pipe out of his mouth and said that in all his sailing around the world +he had never known anything queerer than what happened to a big +steamship he chanced to be on, which ran into an island in a fog. +Everybody on board thought the ship was wrecked, but it had twin +screws, and was going at such a tremendous speed that it turned the +island entirely upside down and sailed over it, and he had heard tell +that even now people sailing over the spot could look down into the +water and see the roots of the trees and the cellars of the houses. + +Captain Sanderson now put his pipe back into his mouth, and Captain +Burress took out his pipe. + +"I was once in an obelisk-ship," said he, "that used to trade regular +between Egypt and New York, carrying obelisks. We had a big obelisk on +board. The way they ship obelisks is to make a hole in the stern of +the ship, and run the obelisk in, p'inted end foremost; and this +obelisk filled up nearly the whole of that ship from stern to bow. We +was about ten days out, and sailing afore a northeast gale with the +engines at full speed, when suddenly we spied breakers ahead, and our +Captain saw we was about to run on a bank. Now if we hadn't had an +obelisk on board we might have sailed over that bank, but the captain +knew that with an obelisk on board we drew too much water for this, and +that we'd be wrecked in about fifty-five seconds if something wasn't +done quick. So he had to do something quick, and this is what he did: +He ordered all steam on, and drove slam-bang on that bank. Just as he +expected, we stopped so suddint that that big obelisk bounced for'ard, +its p'inted end foremost, and went clean through the bow and shot out +into the sea. The minute it did that the vessel was so lightened that +it rose in the water and we easily steamed over the bank. There was +one man knocked overboard by the shock when we struck, but as soon as +we missed him we went back after him and we got him all right. You +see, when that obelisk went overboard, its butt-end, which was +heaviest, went down first, and when it touched the bottom it just stood +there, and as it was such a big obelisk there was about five and a half +feet of it stuck out of the water. The man who was knocked overboard +he just swum for that obelisk and he climbed up the hiryglyphics. It +was a mighty fine obelisk, and the Egyptians had cut their hiryglyphics +good and deep, so that the man could get hand and foot-hold; and when +we got to him and took him off, he was sitting high and dry on the +p'inted end of that obelisk. It was a great pity about the obelisk, +for it was a good obelisk, but as I never heard the company tried to +raise it, I expect it is standing there yet." + +Captain Burress now put his pipe back into his mouth and looked at +Captain Jenkinson, who removed his pipe and said: + +"The queerest thing that ever happened to me was about a shark. We was +off the Banks, and the time of year was July, and the ice was coming +down, and we got in among a lot of it. Not far away, off our weather +bow, there was a little iceberg which had such a queerness about it +that the captain and three men went in a boat to look at it. The ice +was mighty clear ice, and you could see almost through it, and right +inside of it, not more than three feet above the waterline, and about +two feet, or maybe twenty inches, inside the ice, was a whopping big +shark, about fourteen feet long,--a regular man-eater,--frozen in there +hard and fast. `Bless my soul,' said the captain, `this is a wonderful +curiosity, and I'm going to git him out.' Just then one of the men +said he saw that shark wink, but the captain wouldn't believe him, for +he said that shark was frozen stiff and hard and couldn't wink. You +see, the captain had his own idees about things, and he knew that +whales was warm-blooded and would freeze if they was shut up in ice, +but he forgot that sharks was not whales and that they're cold-blooded +just like toads. And there is toads that has been shut up in rocks for +thousands of years, and they stayed alive, no matter how cold the place +was, because they was cold-blooded, and when the rocks was split, out +hopped the frog. But, as I said before, the captain forgot sharks was +cold-blooded, and he determined to git that one out. + +"Now you both know, being housekeepers, that if you take a needle and +drive it into a hunk of ice you can split it. The captain had a +sail-needle with him, and so he drove it into the iceberg right +alongside of the shark and split it. Now the minute he did it he knew +that the man was right when he said he saw the shark wink, for it +flopped out of that iceberg quicker nor a flash of lightning." + +"What a happy fish he must have been!" ejaculated Dorcas, forgetful of +precedent, so great was her emotion. + +"Yes," said Captain Jenkinson, "it was a happy fish enough, but it +wasn't a happy captain. You see, that shark hadn't had anything to +eat, perhaps for a thousand years, until the captain came along with +his sail-needle." + +"Surely you sailormen do see strange things," now said the widow, "and +the strangest thing about them is that they are true." + +"Yes, indeed," said Dorcas, "that is the most wonderful thing." + +"You wouldn't suppose," said the Widow Ducket, glancing from one bench +of mariners to the other, "that I have a sea-story to tell, but I have, +and if you like I will tell it to you." + +Captain Bird looked up a little surprised. + +"We would like to hear it--indeed, we would, madam," said he. + +"Ay, ay!" said Captain Burress, and the two other mariners nodded. + +"It was a good while ago," she said, "when I was living on the shore +near the head of the bay, that my husband was away and I was left alone +in the house. One mornin' my sister-in-law, who lived on the other +side of the bay, sent me word by a boy on a horse that she hadn't any +oil in the house to fill the lamp that she always put in the window to +light her husband home, who was a fisherman, and if I would send her +some by the boy she would pay me back as soon as they bought oil. The +boy said he would stop on his way home and take the oil to her, but he +never did stop, or perhaps he never went back, and about five o'clock I +began to get dreadfully worried, for I knew if that lamp wasn't in my +sister-in-law's window by dark she might be a widow before midnight. +So I said to myself, `I've got to get that oil to her, no matter what +happens or how it's done.' Of course I couldn't tell what might +happen, but there was only one way it could be done, and that was for +me to get into the boat that was tied to the post down by the water, +and take it to her, for it was too far for me to walk around by the +head of the bay. Now, the trouble was, I didn't know no more about a +boat and the managin' of it than any one of you sailormen knows about +clear starchin'. But there wasn't no use of thinkin' what I knew and +what I didn't know, for I had to take it to her, and there was no way +of doin' it except in that boat. So I filled a gallon can, for I +thought I might as well take enough while I was about it, and I went +down to the water and I unhitched that boat and I put the oil-can into +her, and then I got in, and off I started, and when I was about a +quarter of a mile from the shore--" + +"Madam," interrupted Captain Bird, "did you row or--or was there a sail +to the boat?" + +The widow looked at the questioner for a moment. "No," said she, "I +didn't row. I forgot to bring the oars from the house; but it didn't +matter, for I didn't know how to use them, and if there had been a sail +I couldn't have put it up, for I didn't know how to use it, either. I +used the rudder to make the boat go. The rudder was the only thing I +knew anything about. I'd held a rudder when I was a little girl, and I +knew how to work it. So I just took hold of the handle of the rudder +and turned it round and round, and that made the boat go ahead, you +know, and--" + +"Madam!" exclaimed Captain Bird, and the other elderly mariners took +their pipes from their mouths. + +"Yes, that is the way I did it," continued the widow, briskly. "Big +steamships are made to go by a propeller turning round and round at +their back ends, and I made the rudder work in the same way, and I got +along very well, too, until suddenly, when I was about a quarter of a +mile from the shore, a most terrible and awful storm arose. There must +have been a typhoon or a cyclone out at sea, for the waves came up the +bay bigger than houses, and when they got to the head of the bay they +turned around and tried to get out to sea again. So in this way they +continually met, and made the most awful and roarin' pilin' up of waves +that ever was known. + +"My little boat was pitched about as if it had been a feather in a +breeze, and when the front part of it was cleavin' itself down into the +water the hind part was stickin' up until the rudder whizzed around +like a patent churn with no milk in it. The thunder began to roar and +the lightnin' flashed, and three seagulls, so nearly frightened to +death that they began to turn up the whites of their eyes, flew down +and sat on one of the seats of the boat, forgettin' in that awful +moment that man was their nat'ral enemy. I had a couple of biscuits in +my pocket, because I had thought I might want a bite in crossing, and I +crumbled up one of these and fed the poor creatures. Then I began to +wonder what I was goin' to do, for things were gettin' awfuller and +awfuller every instant, and the little boat was a-heavin' and +a-pitchin' and a-rollin' and h'istin' itself up, first on one end and +then on the other, to such an extent that if I hadn't kept tight hold +of the rudder-handle I'd slipped off the seat I was sittin' on. + +"All of a sudden I remembered that oil in the can; but just as I was +puttin' my fingers on the cork my conscience smote me. `Am I goin' to +use this oil,' I said to myself, `and let my sister-in-law's husband be +wrecked for want of it?' And then I thought that he wouldn't want it +all that night, and perhaps they would buy oil the next day, and so I +poured out about a tumblerful of it on the water, and I can just tell +you sailormen that you never saw anything act as prompt as that did. +In three seconds, or perhaps five, the water all around me, for the +distance of a small front yard, was just as flat as a table and as +smooth as glass, and so invitin' in appearance that the three gulls +jumped out of the boat and began to swim about on it, primin' their +feathers and lookin' at themselves in the transparent depths, though I +must say that one of them made an awful face as he dipped his bill into +the water and tasted kerosene. + +"Now I had time to sit quiet in the midst of the placid space I had +made for myself, and rest from workin' of the rudder. Truly it was a +wonderful and marvellous thing to look at. The waves was roarin' and +leapin' up all around me higher than the roof of this house, and +sometimes their tops would reach over so that they nearly met and shut +out all view of the stormy sky, which seemed as if it was bein' torn to +pieces by blazin' lightnin', while the thunder pealed so tremendous +that it almost drowned the roar of the waves. Not only above and all +around me was every thing terrific and fearful, but even under me it +was the same, for there was a big crack in the bottom of the boat as +wide as my hand, and through this I could see down into the water +beneath, and there was--" + +"Madam!" ejaculated Captain Bird, the hand which had been holding his +pipe a few inches from his mouth now dropping to his knee; and at this +motion the hands which held the pipes of the three other mariners +dropped to their knees. + +"Of course it sounds strange," continued the widow, "but I know that +people can see down into clear water, and the water under me was clear, +and the crack was wide enough for me to see through, and down under me +was sharks and swordfishes and other horrible water creatures, which I +had never seen before, all driven into the bay, I haven't a doubt, by +the violence of the storm out at sea. The thought of my bein' upset +and fallin' in among those monsters made my very blood run cold, and +involuntary-like I began to turn the handle of the rudder, and in a +moment I shot into a wall of ragin' sea-water that was towerin' around +me. For a second I was fairly blinded and stunned, but I had the cork +out of that oil-can in no time, and very soon--you'd scarcely believe +it if I told you how soon--I had another placid mill-pond surroundin' +of me. I sat there a-pantin' and fannin' with my straw hat, for you'd +better believe I was flustered, and then I began to think how long it +would take me to make a line of mill-ponds clean across the head of the +bay, and how much oil it would need, and whether I had enough. So I +sat and calculated that if a tumblerful of oil would make a smooth +place about seven yards across, which I should say was the width of the +one I was in,--which I calculated by a measure of my eye as to how many +breadths of carpet it would take to cover it,--and if the bay was two +miles across betwixt our house and my sister-in-law's, and, although I +couldn't get the thing down to exact figures, I saw pretty soon that I +wouldn't have oil enough to make a level cuttin' through all those +mountainous billows, and besides, even if I had enough to take me +across, what would be the good of goin' if there wasn't any oil left to +fill my sister-in-law's lamp? + +"While I was thinkin' and calculatin' a perfectly dreadful thing +happened, which made me think if I didn't get out of this pretty soon +I'd find myself in a mighty risky predicament. The oil-can, which I +had forgotten to put the cork in, toppled over, and before I could grab +it every drop of the oil ran into the hind part of the boat, where it +was soaked up by a lot of dry dust that was there. No wonder my heart +sank when I saw this. Glancin' wildly around me, as people will do +when they are scared, I saw the smooth place I was in gettin' smaller +and smaller, for the kerosene was evaporatin', as it will do even off +woollen clothes if you give it time enough. The first pond I had come +out of seemed to be covered up, and the great, towerin', throbbin' +precipice of sea-water was a-closin' around me. + +"Castin' down my eyes in despair, I happened to look through the crack +in the bottom of the boat, and oh, what a blessed relief it was! for +down there everything was smooth and still, and I could see the sand on +the bottom, as level and hard, no doubt, as it was on the beach. +Suddenly the thought struck me that that bottom would give me the only +chance I had of gettin' out of the frightful fix I was in. If I could +fill that oil-can with air, and then puttin' it under my arm and takin' +a long breath if I could drop down on that smooth bottom, I might run +along toward shore, as far as I could, and then, when I felt my breath +was givin' out, I could take a pull at the oil-can and take another +run, and then take another pull and another run, and perhaps the can +would hold air enough for me until I got near enough to shore to wade +to dry land. To be sure, the sharks and other monsters were down +there, but then they must have been awfully frightened, and perhaps +they might not remember that man was their nat'ral enemy. Anyway, I +thought it would be better to try the smooth water passage down there +than stay and be swallowed up by the ragin' waves on top. + +"So I blew the can full of air and corked it, and then I tore up some +of the boards from the bottom of the boat so as to make a hole big +enough for me to get through,--and you sailormen needn't wriggle so +when I say that, for you all know a divin'-bell hasn't any bottom at +all and the water never comes in,--and so when I got the hole big +enough I took the oil-can under my arm, and was just about to slip down +through it when I saw an awful turtle a-walkin' through the sand at the +bottom. Now, I might trust sharks and swordfishes and sea-serpents to +be frightened and forget about their nat'ral enemies, but I never could +trust a gray turtle as big as a cart, with a black neck a yard long, +with yellow bags to its jaws, to forget anything or to remember +anything. I'd as lieve get into a bath-tub with a live crab as to go +down there. It wasn't of no use even so much as thinkin' of it, so I +gave up that plan and didn't once look through that hole again." + +"And what did you do, madam?" asked Captain Bird, who was regarding her +with a face of stone. + +"I used electricity," she said. "Now don't start as if you had a shock +of it. That's what I used. When I was younger than I was then, and +sometimes visited friends in the city, we often amused ourselves by +rubbing our feet on the carpet until we got ourselves so full of +electricity that we could put up our fingers and light the gas. So I +said to myself that if I could get full of electricity for the purpose +of lightin' the gas I could get full of it for other purposes, and so, +without losin' a moment, I set to work. I stood up on one of the +seats, which was dry, and I rubbed the bottoms of my shoes backward and +forward on it with such violence and swiftness that they pretty soon +got warm and I began fillin' with electricity, and when I was fully +charged with it from my toes to the top of my head, I just sprang into +the water and swam ashore. Of course I couldn't sink, bein' full of +electricity." + +Captain Bird heaved a long sigh and rose to his feet, whereupon the +other mariners rose to their feet "Madam," said Captain Bird, "what's +to pay for the supper and--the rest of the entertainment?" + +"The supper is twenty-five cents apiece," said the Widow Ducket, "and +everything else is free, gratis." + +Whereupon each mariner put his hand into his trousers pocket, pulled +out a silver quarter, and handed it to the widow. Then, with four +solemn "Good evenin's," they went out to the front gate. + +"Cast off, Captain Jenkinson," said Captain Bird, "and you, Captain +Burress, clew him up for'ard. You can stay in the bow, Captain +Sanderson, and take the sheet-lines. I'll go aft." + +All being ready, each of the elderly mariners clambered over a wheel, +and having seated themselves, they prepared to lay their course for +Cuppertown. + +But just as they were about to start, Captain Jenkinson asked that they +lay to a bit, and clambering down over his wheel, he reentered the +front gate and went up to the door of the house, where the widow and +Dorcas were still standing. + +"Madam," said he, "I just came back to ask what became of your +brother-in-law through his wife's not bein' able to put no light in the +window?" + +"The storm drove him ashore on our side of the bay," said she, "and the +next mornin' he came up to our house, and I told him all that had +happened to me. And when he took our boat and went home and told that +story to his wife, she just packed up and went out West, and got +divorced from him. And it served him right, too." + +"Thank you, ma'am," said Captain Jenkinson, and going out of the gate, +he clambered up over the wheel, and the wagon cleared for Cuppertown. + +When the elderly mariners were gone, the Widow Ducket, still standing +in the door, turned to Dorcas. + +"Think of it!" she said. "To tell all that to me, in my own house! +And after I had opened my one jar of brandied peaches, that I'd been +keepin' for special company!" + +"In your own house!" ejaculated Dorcas. "And not one of them brandied +peaches left!" + +The widow jingled the four quarters in her hand before she slipped them +into her pocket. + +"Anyway, Dorcas," she remarked, "I think we can now say we are square +with all the world, and so let's go in and wash the dishes." + +"Yes," said Dorcas, "we're square." + + + + +CAPTAIN ELI'S BEST EAR + +The little seaside village of Sponkannis lies so quietly upon a +protected spot on our Atlantic coast that it makes no more stir in the +world than would a pebble which, held between one's finger and thumb, +should be dipped below the surface of a millpond and then dropped. +About the post-office and the store--both under the same roof--the +greater number of the houses cluster, as if they had come for their +week's groceries, or were waiting for the mail, while toward the west +the dwellings become fewer and fewer, until at last the village blends +into a long stretch of sandy coast and scrubby pine-woods. Eastward +the village ends abruptly at the foot of a windswept bluff, on which no +one cares to build. + +Among the last houses in the western end of the village stood two neat, +substantial dwellings, one belonging to Captain Eli Bunker, and the +other to Captain Cephas Dyer. These householders were two very +respectable retired mariners, the first a widower about fifty, and the +other a bachelor of perhaps the same age, a few years more or less +making but little difference in this region of weather-beaten youth and +seasoned age. + +Each of these good captains lived alone, and each took entire charge of +his own domestic affairs, not because he was poor, but because it +pleased him to do so. When Captain Eli retired from the sea he was the +owner of a good vessel, which he sold at a fair profit; and Captain +Cephas had made money in many a voyage before he built his house in +Sponkannis and settled there. + +When Captain Eli's wife was living she was his household manager. But +Captain Cephas had never had a woman in his house, except during the +first few months of his occupancy, when certain female neighbors came +in occasionally to attend to little matters of cleaning which, +according to popular notions, properly belong to the sphere of woman. + +But Captain Cephas soon put an end to this sort of thing. He did not +like a woman's ways, especially her ways of attending to domestic +affairs. He liked to live in sailor fashion, and to keep house in +sailor fashion. In his establishment everything was shipshape, and +everything which could be stowed away was stowed away, and, if +possible, in a bunker. The floors were holystoned nearly every day, +and the whole house was repainted about twice a year, a little at a +time, when the weather was suitable for this marine recreation. Things +not in frequent use were lashed securely to the walls, or perhaps put +out of the way by being hauled up to the ceiling by means of blocks and +tackle. His cooking was done sailor fashion, like everything else, and +he never failed to have plum-duff on Sunday. His well was near his +house, and every morning he dropped into it a lead and line, and noted +down the depth of water. Three times a day he entered in a little +note-book the state of the weather, the height of the mercury in +barometer and thermometer, the direction of the wind, and special +weather points when necessary. + +Captain Eli managed his domestic affairs in an entirely different way. +He kept house woman fashion--not, however, in the manner of an ordinary +woman, but after the manner of his late wife, Miranda Bunker, now dead +some seven years. Like his friend, Captain Cephas, he had had the +assistance of his female neighbors during the earlier days of his +widowerhood. But he soon found that these women did not do things as +Miranda used to do them, and, although he frequently suggested that +they should endeavor to imitate the methods of his late consort, they +did not even try to do things as she used to do them, preferring their +own ways. Therefore it was that Captain Eli determined to keep house +by himself, and to do it, as nearly as his nature would allow, as +Miranda used to do it. He swept his doors and he shook his door-mats; +he washed his paint with soap and hot water; he dusted his furniture +with a soft cloth, which he afterwards stuck behind a chest of drawers. +He made his bed very neatly, turning down the sheet at the top, and +setting the pillow upon edge, smoothing it carefully after he had done +so. His cooking was based on the methods of the late Miranda. He had +never been able to make bread rise properly, but he had always liked +ship-biscuit, and he now greatly preferred them to the risen bread made +by his neighbors. And as to coffee and the plainer articles of food +with which he furnished his table, even Miranda herself would not have +objected to them had she been alive and very hungry. + +The houses of the two captains were not very far apart, and they were +good neighbors, often smoking their pipes together and talking of the +sea. But this was always on the little porch in front of Captain +Cephas's house, or by his kitchen fire in the winter. Captain Eli did +not like the smell of tobacco smoke in his house, or even in front of +it in summer-time, when the doors were open. He had no objection +himself to the odor of tobacco, but it was contrary to the principles +of woman housekeeping that rooms should smell of it, and he was always +true to those principles. + +It was late in a certain December, and through the village there was a +pleasant little flutter of Christmas preparations. Captain Eli had +been up to the store, and he had stayed there a good while, warming +himself by the stove, and watching the women coming in to buy things +for Christmas. It was strange how many things they bought for presents +or for holiday use--fancy soap and candy, handkerchiefs and little +woollen shawls for old people, and a lot of pretty little things which +he knew the use of, but which Captain Cephas would never have +understood at all had he been there. + +As Captain Eli came out of the store he saw a cart in which were two +good-sized Christmas trees, which had been cut in the woods, and were +going, one to Captain Holmes's house, and the other to Mother Nelson's. +Captain Holmes had grandchildren, and Mother Nelson, with never a child +of her own, good old soul, had three little orphan nieces who never +wanted for anything needful at Christmas-time or any other time. + +Captain Eli walked home very slowly, taking observations in his mind. +It was more than seven years since he had had anything to do with +Christmas, except that on that day he had always made himself a +mince-pie, the construction and the consumption of which were equally +difficult. It is true that neighbors had invited him, and they had +invited Captain Cephas, to their Christmas dinners, but neither of +these worthy seamen had ever accepted any of these invitations. Even +holiday food, when not cooked in sailor fashion, did not agree with +Captain Cephas, and it would have pained the good heart of Captain Eli +if he had been forced to make believe to enjoy a Christmas dinner so +very inferior to those which Miranda used to set before him. + +But now the heart of Captain Eli was gently moved by a Christmas +flutter. It had been foolish, perhaps, for him to go up to the store +at such a time as this, but the mischief had been done. Old feelings +had come back to him, and he would be glad to celebrate Christmas this +year if he could think of any good way to do it. And the result of his +mental observations was that he went over to Captain Cephas's house to +talk to him about it. + +Captain Cephas was in his kitchen, smoking his third morning pipe. +Captain Eli filled his pipe, lighted it, and sat down by the fire. + +"Cap'n," said he, "what do you say to our keepin Christmas this year? +A Christmas dinner is no good if it's got to be eat alone, and you and +me might eat ourn together. It might be in my house, or it might be in +your house--it won't make no great difference to me which. Of course, +I like woman housekeepin', as is laid down in the rules of service fer +my house. But next best to that I like sailor housekeepin', so I don't +mind which house the dinner is in, Cap'n Cephas, so it suits you." + +Captain Cephas took his pipe from his mouth. "You're pretty late +thinkin' about it," said he, "fer day after to-morrow's Christmas." + +"That don't make no difference," said Captain Eli. "What things we +want that are not in my house or your house we can easily get either up +at the store or else in the woods." + +"In the woods!" exclaimed Captain Cephas. "What in the name of thunder +do you expect to get in the woods for Christmas?" + +"A Christmas tree," said Captain Eli. "I thought it might be a nice +thing to have a Christmas tree fer Christmas. Cap'n Holmes has got +one, and Mother Nelson's got another. I guess nearly everybody's got +one. It won't cost anything--I can go and cut it." + +Captain Cephas grinned a grin, as if a great leak had been sprung in +the side of a vessel, stretching nearly from stem to stern. + +"A Christmas tree!" he exclaimed. "Well, I am blessed! But look here, +Cap'n Eli. You don't know what a Christmas tree's fer. It's fer +children, and not fer grown-ups. Nobody ever does have a Christmas +tree in any house where there ain't no children." + +Captain Eli rose and stood with his back to the fire. "I didn't think +of that," he said, "but I guess it's so. And when I come to think of +it, a Christmas isn't much of a Christmas, anyway, without children." + +"You never had none," said Captain Cephas, "and you've kept Christmas." + +"Yes," replied Captain Eli, reflectively, "we did do it, but there was +always a lackment--Miranda has said so, and I have said so." + +"You didn't have no Christmas tree," said Captain Cephas. + +"No, we didn't. But I don't think that folks was as much set on +Christmas trees then as they 'pear to be now. I wonder," he continued, +thoughtfully gazing at the ceiling, "if we was to fix up a Christmas +tree--and you and me's got a lot of pretty things that we've picked up +all over the world, that would go miles ahead of anything that could be +bought at the store fer Christmas trees--if we was to fix up a tree +real nice, if we couldn't get some child or other that wasn't likely to +have a tree to come in and look at it, and stay awhile, and make +Christmas more like Christmas. And then, when it went away, it could +take along the things that was hangin' on the tree, and keep 'em fer +its own." + +"That wouldn't work," said Captain Cephas. "If you get a child into +this business, you must let it hang up its stockin' before it goes to +bed, and find it full in the mornin', and then tell it an all-fired lie +about Santa Claus if it asks any questions. Most children think more +of stockin's than they do of trees--so I've heard, at least." + +"I've got no objections to stockin's," said Captain Eli. "If it wanted +to hang one up, it could hang one up either here or in my house, +wherever we kept Christmas." + +"You couldn't keep a child all night," sardonically remarked Captain +Cephas, "and no more could I. Fer if it was to get up a croup in the +night, it would be as if we was on a lee shore with anchors draggin' +and a gale a-blowin'." + +"That's so," said Captain Eli. "You've put it fair. I suppose if we +did keep a child all night, we'd have to have some sort of a woman +within hail in case of a sudden blow." + +Captain Cephas sniffed. "What's the good of talkin'?" said he. "There +ain't no child, and there ain't no woman that you could hire to sit all +night on my front step or on your front step, a-waitin' to be piped on +deck in case of croup." + +"No," said Captain Eli. "I don't suppose there's any child in this +village that ain't goin' to be provided with a Christmas tree or a +Christmas stockin', or perhaps both--except, now I come to think of it, +that little gal that was brought down here with her mother last summer, +and has been kept by Mrs. Crumley sence her mother died." + +"And won't be kept much longer," said Captain Cephas, "fer I've hearn +Mrs. Crumley say she couldn't afford it." + +"That's so," said Captain Eli. "If she can't afford to keep the little +gal, she can't afford to give no Christmas trees nor stockin's, and so +it seems to me, cap'n, that that little gal would be a pretty good +child to help us keep Christmas." + +"You're all the time forgettin'," said the other, "that nuther of us +can keep a child all night." + +Captain Eli seated himself, and looked ponderingly into the fire. +"You're right, cap'n," said he. "We'd have to ship some woman to take +care of her. Of course, it wouldn't be no use to ask Mrs. Crumley?" + +Captain Cephas laughed. "I should say not." + +"And there doesn't seem to be anybody else," said his companion. "Can +you think of anybody, cap'n?" + +"There ain't anybody to think of," replied Captain Cephas, "unless it +might be Eliza Trimmer. She's generally ready enough to do anything +that turns up. But she wouldn't be no good--her house is too far away +for either you or me to hail her in case a croup came up suddint." + +"That's so," said Captain Eli. "She does live a long way off." + +"So that settles the whole business," said Captain Cephas. "She's too +far away to come if wanted, and nuther of us couldn't keep no child +without somebody to come if they was wanted, and it's no use to have a +Christmas tree without a child. A Christmas without a Christmas tree +don't seem agreeable to you, cap'n, so I guess we'd better get along +just the same as we've been in the habit of doin', and eat our +Christmas dinner, as we do our other meals in our own houses." + +Captain Eli looked into the fire. "I don't like to give up things if I +can help it. That was always my way. If wind and tide's ag'in' me, I +can wait till one or the other, or both of them, serve." + + "Yes," said Captain Cephas, "you was always that kind of a +man." + +"That's so. But it does 'pear to me as if I'd have to give up this +time, though it's a pity to do it, on account of the little gal, fer +she ain't likely to have any Christmas this year. She's a nice little +gal, and takes as natural to navigation as if she'd been born at sea. +I've given her two or three things because she's so pretty, but there's +nothing she likes so much as a little ship I gave her." + +"Perhaps she was born at sea," remarked Captain Cephas. + +"Perhaps she was," said the other; "and that makes it the bigger pity." + +For a few moments nothing was said. Then Captain Eli suddenly +exclaimed, "I'll tell you what we might do, cap'n! We might ask Mrs. +Trimmer to lend a hand in givin' the little gal a Christmas. She ain't +got nobody in her house but herself, and I guess she'd be glad enough +to help give that little gal a regular Christmas. She could go and get +the child, and bring her to your house or to my house, or wherever +we're goin' to keep Christmas, and--" + +"Well," said Captain Cephas, with an air of scrutinizing inquiry, +"what?" + +"Well," replied the other, a little hesitatingly, "so far as I'm +concerned,--that is, I don't mind one way or the other,--she might take +her Christmas dinner along with us and the little gal, and then she +could fix her stockin' to be hung up, and help with the Christmas tree, +and--" + +"Well," demanded Captain Cephas, "what?" + +"Well," said Captain Eli, "she could--that is, it doesn't make any +difference to me one way or the other--she might stay all night at +whatever house we kept Christmas in, and then you and me might spend +the night in the other house, and then she could be ready there to help +the child in the mornin', when she came to look at her stockin'." + +Captain Cephas fixed upon his friend an earnest glare. "That's pretty +considerable of an idea to come upon you so suddint," said he. "But I +can tell you one thing: there ain't a-goin' to be any such doin's in my +house. If you choose to come over here to sleep, and give up your +house to any woman you can find to take care of the little gal, all +right. But the thing can't be done here." + +There was a certain severity in these remarks, but they appeared to +affect Captain Eli very pleasantly. + +"Well," said he, "if you're satisfied, I am. I'll agree to any plan +you choose to make. It doesn't matter to me which house it's in, and +if you say my house, I say my house. All I want is to make the +business agreeable to all concerned. Now it's time fer me to go to my +dinner, and this afternoon we'd better go and try to get things +straightened out, because the little gal, and whatever woman comes with +her, ought to be at my house to-morrow before dark. S'posin' we divide +up this business: I'll go and see Mrs. Crumley about the little gal, +and you can go and see Mrs. Trimmer." + +"No, sir," promptly replied Captain Cephas, "I don't go to see no Mrs. +Trimmer. You can see both of them just the same as you can see +one--they're all along the same way. I'll go cut the Christmas tree." + +"All right," said Captain Eli. "It don't make no difference to me +which does which. But if I was you, cap'n, I'd cut a good big tree, +because we might as well have a good one while we're about it." + +When he had eaten his dinner, and washed up his dishes, and had put +everything away in neat, housewifely order, Captain Eli went to Mrs. +Crumley's house, and very soon finished his business there. Mrs. +Crumley kept the only house which might be considered a boarding-house +in the village of Sponkannis; and when she had consented to take charge +of the little girl who had been left on her hands she had hoped it +would not be very long before she would hear from some of her relatives +in regard to her maintenance. But she had heard nothing, and had now +ceased to expect to hear anything, and in consequence had frequently +remarked that she must dispose of the child some way or other, for she +couldn't afford to keep her any longer. Even an absence of a day or +two at the house of the good captain would be some relief, and Mrs. +Crumley readily consented to the Christmas scheme. As to the little +girl, she was delighted. She already looked upon Captain Eli as her +best friend in the world. + +It was not so easy to go to Mrs. Trimmer's house and put the business +before her. "It ought to be plain sailin' enough," Captain Eli said to +himself, over and over again, "but, fer all that, it don't seem to be +plain sailin'." + +But he was not a man to be deterred by difficult navigation, and he +walked straight to Eliza Trimmer's house. + +Mrs. Trimmer was a comely woman about thirty-five, who had come to the +village a year before, and had maintained herself, or at least had +tried to, by dressmaking and plain sewing. She had lived at Stetford, +a seaport about twenty miles away, and from there, three years before, +her husband, Captain Trimmer, had sailed away in a good-sized schooner, +and had never returned. She had come to Sponkannis because she thought +that there she could live cheaper and get more work than in her former +home. She had found the first quite possible, but her success in +regard to the work had not been very great. + +When Captain Eli entered Mrs. Trimmer's little room, he found her busy +mending a sail. Here fortune favored him. "You turn your hand to +'most anything, Mrs. Trimmer," said he, after he had greeted her. + +"Oh, yes," she answered, with a smile, "I am obliged to do that. +Mending sails is pretty heavy work, but it's better than nothing." + +"I had a notion," said he, "that you was ready to turn your hand to any +good kind of business, so I thought I would step in and ask you if +you'd turn your hand to a little bit of business I've got on the +stocks." + +She stopped sewing on the sail, and listened while Captain Eli laid his +plan before her. "It's very kind in you and Captain Cephas to think of +all that," said she. "I have often noticed that poor little girl, and +pitied her. Certainly I'll come, and you needn't say anything about +paying me for it. I wouldn't think of asking to be paid for doing a +thing like that. And besides,"--she smiled again as she spoke,--"if +you are going to give me a Christmas dinner, as you say, that will make +things more than square." + +Captain Eli did not exactly agree with her, but he was in very good +humor, and she was in good humor, and the matter was soon settled, and +Mrs. Trimmer promised to come to the captain's house in the morning and +help about the Christmas tree, and in the afternoon to go to get the +little girl from Mrs. Crumley's and bring her to the house. + +Captain Eli was delighted with the arrangements. "Things now seem to +be goin' along before a spankin' breeze," said he. "But I don't know +about the dinner. I guess you will have to leave that to me. I don't +believe Captain Cephas could eat a woman-cooked dinner. He's +accustomed to livin sailor fashion, you know, and he has declared over +and over again to me that woman-cookin' doesn't agree with him." + +"But I can cook sailor fashion," said Mrs. Trimmer,--"just as much +sailor fashion as you or Captain Cephas, and if he don't believe it, +I'll prove it to him; so you needn't worry about that." + +When the captain had gone, Mrs. Trimmer gayly put away the sail. There +was no need to finish it in a hurry, and no knowing when she would get +her money for it when it was done. No one had asked her to a Christmas +dinner that year, and she had expected to have a lonely time of it. +But it would be very pleasant to spend Christmas with the little girl +and the two good captains. Instead of sewing any more on the sail, she +got out some of her own clothes to see if they needed anything done to +them. + +The next morning Mrs. Trimmer went to Captain Eli's house, and finding +Captain Cephas there, they all set to work at the Christmas tree, which +was a very fine one, and had been planted in a box. Captain Cephas had +brought over a bundle of things from his house, and Captain Eli kept +running here and there, bringing, each time that he returned, some new +object, wonderful or pretty, which he had brought from China or Japan +or Corea, or some spicy island of the Eastern seas; and nearly every +time he came with these treasures Mrs. Trimmer declared that such +things were too good to put upon a Christmas tree, even for such a nice +little girl as the one for which that tree was intended. The presents +which Captain Cephas brought were much more suitable for the purpose; +they were odd and funny, and some of them pretty, but not expensive, as +were the fans and bits of shellwork and carved ivories which Captain +Eli wished to tie upon the twigs of the tree. + +There was a good deal of talk about all this, but Captain Eli had his +own way. + +"I don't suppose, after all," said he, "that the little gal ought to +have all the things. This is such a big tree that it's more like a +family tree. Cap'n Cephas can take some of my things, and I can take +some of his things, and, Mrs. Trimmer, if there's anything you like, +you can call it your present and take it for your own, so that will be +fair and comfortable all round. What I want is to make everybody +satisfied." + +"I'm sure I think they ought to be," said Mrs. Trimmer, looking very +kindly at Captain Eli. + +Mrs. Trimmer went home to her own house to dinner, and in the afternoon +she brought the little girl. She had said there ought to be an early +supper, so that the child would have time to enjoy the Christmas tree +before she became sleepy. + +This meal was prepared entirely by Captain Eli, and in sailor fashion, +not woman fashion, so that Captain Cephas could make no excuse for +eating his supper at home. Of course they all ought to be together the +whole of that Christmas eve. As for the big dinner on the morrow, that +was another affair, for Mrs. Trimmer undertook to make Captain Cephas +understand that she had always cooked for Captain Trimmer in sailor +fashion, and if he objected to her plum-duff, or if anybody else +objected to her mince-pie, she was going to be very much surprised. + +Captain Cephas ate his supper with a good relish, and was still eating +when the rest had finished. As to the Christmas tree, it was the most +valuable, if not the most beautiful, that had ever been set up in that +region. It had no candles upon it, but was lighted by three lamps and +a ship's lantern placed in the four corners of the room, and the little +girl was as happy as if the tree were decorated with little dolls and +glass balls. Mrs. Trimmer was intensely pleased and interested to see +the child so happy, and Captain Eli was much pleased and interested to +see the child and Mrs. Trimmer so happy, and Captain Cephas was +interested, and perhaps a little amused in a superior fashion, to see +Captain Eli and Mrs. Trimmer and the little child so happy. + +Then the distribution of the presents began. Captain Eli asked Captain +Cephas if he might have the wooden pipe that the latter had brought for +his present. Captain Cephas said he might take it, for all he cared, +and be welcome to it. Then Captain Eli gave Captain Cephas a red +bandanna handkerchief of a very curious pattern, and Captain Cephas +thanked him kindly. After which Captain Eli bestowed upon Mrs. Trimmer +a most beautiful tortoise-shell comb, carved and cut and polished in a +wonderful way, and with it he gave a tortoise-shell fan, carved in the +same fashion, because he said the two things seemed to belong to each +other and ought to go together; and he would not listen to one word of +what Mrs. Trimmer said about the gifts being too good for her, and that +she was not likely ever to use them. + +"It seems to me," said Captain Cephas, "that you might be giving +something to the little gal." + +Then Captain Eli remembered that the child ought not to be forgotten, +and her soul was lifted into ecstasy by many gifts, some of which Mrs. +Trimmer declared were too good for any child in this wide, wide world. +But Captain Eli answered that they could be taken care of by somebody +until the little girl was old enough to know their value. + +Then it was discovered that, unbeknown to anybody else, Mrs. Trimmer +had put some presents on the tree, which were things which had been +brought by Captain Trimmer from somewhere in the far East or the +distant West. These she bestowed upon Captain Cephas and Captain Eli. +And the end of all this was that in the whole of Sponkannis, from the +foot of the bluff to the east, to the very last house on the shore to +the west, there was not one Christmas eve party so happy as this one. + +Captain Cephas was not quite so happy as the three others were, but he +was very much interested. About nine o'clock the party broke up, and +the two captains put on their caps and buttoned up their pea-jackets, +and started for Captain Cephas's house, but not before Captain Eli had +carefully fastened every window and every door except the front door, +and had told Mrs. Trimmer how to fasten that when they had gone, and +had given her a boatswain's whistle, which she might blow out of the +window if there should be a sudden croup and it should be necessary for +any one to go anywhere. He was sure he could hear it, for the wind was +exactly right for him to hear a whistle from his house. When they had +gone Mrs. Trimmer put the little girl to bed, and was delighted to find +in what a wonderfully neat and womanlike fashion that house was kept. + +It was nearly twelve o'clock that night when Captain Eli, sleeping in +his bunk opposite that of Captain Cephas, was aroused by hearing a +sound. He had been lying with his best ear uppermost, so that he +should hear anything if there happened to be anything to hear. He did +hear something, but it was not a boatswain's whistle; it was a +prolonged cry, and it seemed to come from the sea. + +In a moment Captain Eli was sitting on the side of his bunk, listening +intently. Again came the cry. The window toward the sea was slightly +open, and he heard it plainly. + +"Cap'n!" said he, and at the word Captain Cephas was sitting on the +side of his bunk, listening. He knew from his companion's attitude, +plainly visible in the light of a lantern which hung on a hook at the +other end of the room, that he had been awakened to listen. Again came +the cry. + +"That's distress at sea," said Captain Cephas. "Harken!" + +They listened again for nearly a minute, when the cry was repeated. + +"Bounce on deck, boys!" said Captain Cephas, getting out on the floor. +"There's some one in distress off shore." + +Captain Eli jumped to the floor, and began to dress quickly. + +"It couldn't be a call from land?" he asked hurriedly. "It don't sound +a bit to you like a boatswain's whistle, does it?" + +"No," said Captain Cephas, disdainfully. "It's a call from sea." Then, +seizing a lantern, he rushed down the companionway. + +As soon as he was convinced that it was a call from sea, Captain Eli +was one in feeling and action with Captain Cephas. The latter hastily +opened the draughts of the kitchen stove, and put on some wood, and by +the time this was done Captain Eli had the kettle filled and on the +stove. Then they clapped on their caps and their pea-jackets, each +took an oar from a corner in the back hall, and together they ran down +to the beach. + +The night was dark, but not very cold, and Captain Cephas had been to +the store that morning in his boat. + +Whenever he went to the store, and the weather permitted, he rowed +there in his boat rather than walk. At the bow of the boat, which was +now drawn up on the sand, the two men stood and listened. Again came +the cry from the sea. + +"It's something ashore on the Turtle-back Shoal," said Captain Cephas. + +"Yes," said Captain Eli, "and it's some small craft, fer that cry is +down pretty nigh to the water." + +"Yes," said Captain Cephas. "And there's only one man aboard, or else +they'd take turns a-hollerin'." + +"He's a stranger," said Captain Eli, "or he wouldn't have tried, even +with a cat-boat, to get in over that shoal on ebb-tide." + +As they spoke they ran the boat out into the water and jumped in, each +with an oar. Then they pulled for the Turtle-back Shoal. + +Although these two captains were men of fifty or thereabout, they were +as strong and tough as any young fellows in the village, and they +pulled with steady strokes, and sent the heavy boat skimming over the +water, not in a straight line toward the Turtle-back Shoal, but now a +few points in the darkness this way, and now a few points in the +darkness that way, then with a great curve to the south through the +dark night, keeping always near the middle of the only good channel out +of the bay when the tide was ebbing. + +Now the cries from seaward had ceased, but the two captains were not +discouraged. + +"He's heard the thumpin' of our oars," said Captain Cephas. + +"He's listenin', and he'll sing out again if he thinks we're goin' +wrong," said Captain Eli. "Of course he doesn't know anything about +that." + +And so when they made the sweep to the south the cry came again, and +Captain Eli grinned. "We needn't to spend no breath hollerin'," said +he. "He'll hear us makin' fer him in a minute." + +When they came to head for the shoal they lay on their oars for a +moment, while Captain Cephas turned the lantern in the bow, so that its +light shone out ahead. He had not wanted the shipwrecked person to see +the light when it would seem as if the boat were rowing away from him. +He had heard of castaway people who became so wild when they imagined +that a ship or boat was going away from them that they jumped overboard. + +When the two captains reached the shoal, they found there a cat-boat +aground, with one man aboard. His tale was quickly told. He had +expected to run into the little bay that afternoon, but the wind had +fallen, and in trying to get in after dark, and being a stranger, he +had run aground. If he had not been so cold, he said, he would have +been willing to stay there till the tide rose; but he was getting +chilled, and seeing a light not far away, he concluded to call for help +as long as his voice held out. + +The two captains did not ask many questions. They helped anchor the +cat-boat, and then they took the man on their boat and rowed him to +shore. He was getting chilled sitting out there doing nothing, and so +when they reached the house they made him some hot grog, and promised +in the morning, when the tide rose, they would go out and help him +bring his boat in. Then Captain Cephas showed the stranger to a bunk, +and they all went to bed. Such experiences had not enough of novelty +to the good captains to keep them awake five minutes. + +In the morning they were all up very early, and the stranger, who +proved to be a seafaring man with bright blue eyes, said that, as his +cat-boat seemed to be riding all right at its anchorage, he did not +care to go out after her just yet. Any time during flood-tide would do +for him, and he had some business that he wanted to attend to as soon +as possible. + +This suited the two captains very well, for they wished to be on hand +when the little girl discovered her stocking. + +"Can you tell me," said the stranger, as he put on his cap, "where I +can find a Mrs. Trimmer, who lives in this village?" + +At these words all the sturdy stiffness which, from his youth up, had +characterized the legs of Captain Eli entirely went out of them, and he +sat suddenly upon a bench. For a few moments there was silence. + +Then Captain Cephas, who thought some answer should be made to the +question, nodded his head. + +"I want to see her as soon as I can," said the stranger. "I have come +to see her on particular business that will be a surprise to her. I +wanted to be here before Christmas began, and that's the reason I took +that cat-boat from Stetford, because I thought I'd come quicker that +way than by land. But the wind fell, as I told you. If either one of +you would be good enough to pilot me to where Mrs. Trimmer lives, or to +any point where I can get a sight of the place, I'd be obliged." + +Captain Eli rose and with hurried but unsteady steps went into the +house (for they had been upon the little piazza), and beckoned to his +friend to follow. The two men stood in the kitchen and looked at each +other. The face of Captain Eli was of the hue of a clam-shell. + +"Go with him, cap'n," he said in a hoarse whisper. "I can't do it." + +"To your house?" inquired the other. + +"Of course. Take him to my house. There ain't no other place where +she is. Take him along." + +Captain Cephas's countenance wore an air of the deepest concern, but he +thought that the best thing to do was to get the stranger away. + + As they walked rapidly toward Captain Eli's house there was +very little said by either Captain Cephas or the stranger. The latter +seemed anxious to give Mrs. Trimmer a surprise, and not to say anything +which might enable another person to interfere with his project. + +The two men had scarcely stepped upon the piazza when Mrs. Trimmer, who +had been expecting early visitors, opened the door. She was about to +call out "Merry Christmas!" but, her eyes falling upon a stranger, the +words stopped at her lips. First she turned red, then she turned pale, +and Captain Cephas thought she was about to fall. But before she could +do this the stranger had her in his arms. She opened her eyes, which +for a moment she had closed, and, gazing into his face, she put her +arms around his neck. Then Captain Cephas came away, without thinking +of the little girl and the pleasure she would have in discovering her +Christmas stocking. + +When he had been left alone, Captain Eli sat down near the kitchen +stove, close to the very kettle which he had filled with water to heat +for the benefit of the man he had helped bring in from the sea, and, +with his elbows on his knees and his fingers in his hair, he darkly +pondered. + +"If I'd only slept with my hard-o'-hearin' ear up," he said to himself, +"I'd never have heard it." + +In a few moments his better nature condemned this thought. + +"That's next to murder," he muttered, "fer he couldn't have kept +himself from fallin' asleep out there in the cold, and when the tide +riz held have been blowed out to sea with this wind. If I hadn't heard +him, Captain Cephas never would, fer he wasn't primed up to wake, as I +was." + +But, notwithstanding his better nature, Captain Eli was again saying to +himself, when his friend returned, "If I'd only slept with my other ear +up!" + +Like the honest, straightforward mariner he was, Captain Cephas made an +exact report of the facts. "They was huggin' when I left them," he +said, "and I expect they went indoors pretty soon, fer it was too cold +outside. It's an all-fired shame she happened to be in your house, +cap'n, that's all I've got to say about it. It's a thunderin' shame." + +Captain Eli made no answer. He still sat with his elbows on his knees +and his hands in his hair. + +"A better course than you laid down fer these Christmas times was never +dotted on a chart," continued Captain Cephas. "From port of sailin' to +port of entry you laid it down clear and fine. But it seems there was +rocks that wasn't marked on the chart." + +"Yes," groaned Captain Eli, "there was rocks." + +Captain Cephas made no attempt to comfort his friend, but went to work +to get breakfast. + +When that meal--a rather silent one--was over, Captain Eli felt better. +"There was rocks," he said, "and not a breaker to show where they lay, +and I struck 'em bow on. So that's the end of that voyage. But I've +tuk to my boats, cap'n, I've tuk to my boats." + +"I'm glad to hear you've tuk to your boats," said Captain Cephas, with +an approving glance upon his friend. + +About ten minutes afterwards Captain Eli said, "I'm goin' up to my +house." + +"By yourself?" said the other. + +"Yes, by myself. I'd rather go alone. I don't intend to mind +anything, and I'm goin' to tell her that she can stay there and spend +Christmas,--the place she lives in ain't no place to spend +Christmas,--and she can make the little gal have a good time, and go +'long just as we intended to go 'long--plum-duff and mince-pie all the +same. I can stay here, and you and me can have our Christmas dinner +together, if we choose to give it that name. And if she ain't ready to +go to-morrow, she can stay a day or two longer. It's all the same to +me, if it's the same to you, cap'n." + +Captain Cephas having said that it was the same to him, Captain Eli put +on his cap and buttoned up his pea-jacket, declaring that the sooner he +got to his house the better, as she might be thinking that she would +have to move out of it now that things were different. + +Before Captain Eli reached his house he saw something which pleased +him. He saw the sea-going stranger, with his back toward him, walking +rapidly in the direction of the village store. + +Captain Eli quickly entered his house, and in the doorway of the room +where the tree was he met Mrs. Trimmer, beaming brighter than any +morning sun that ever rose. + +"Merry Christmas!" she exclaimed, holding out both her hands. "I've +been wondering and wondering when you'd come to bid me `Merry +Christmas'--the merriest Christmas I've ever had." + +Captain Eli took her hands and bid her "Merry Christmas" very gravely. + +She looked a little surprised. "What's the matter, Captain Eli?" she +exclaimed. "You don't seem to say that as if you meant it." + +"Oh, yes, I do," he answered. "This must be an all-fired--I mean a +thunderin' happy Christmas fer you, Mrs. Trimmer." + +"Yes," said she, her face beaming again. "And to think that it should +happen on Christmas day--that this blessed morning, before anything +else happened, my Bob, my only brother, should--" + +"Your what!" roared Captain Eli, as if he had been shouting orders in a +raging storm. + +Mrs. Trimmer stepped back almost frightened. "My brother," said she. +"Didn't he tell you he was my brother--my brother Bob, who sailed away +a year before I was married, and who has been in Africa and China and I +don't know where? It's so long since I heard that he'd gone into +trading at Singapore that I'd given him up as married and settled in +foreign parts. And here he has come to me as if he'd tumbled from the +sky on this blessed Christmas morning." + +Captain Eli made a step forward, his face very much flushed. + +"Your brother, Mrs. Trimmer--did you really say it was your brother?" + +"Of course it is," said she. "Who else could it be?" Then she paused +for a moment and looked steadfastly at the captain. + +"You don't mean to say, Captain Eli," she asked, "that you thought it +was--" + +"Yes, I did," said Captain Eli, promptly. + +Mrs. Trimmer looked straight in the captain's eyes, then she looked on +the ground. Then she changed color and changed back again. + +"I don't understand," she said hesitatingly, "why--I mean what +difference it made." + +"Difference!" exclaimed Captain Eli. "It was all the difference +between a man on deck and a man overboard--that's the difference it was +to me. I didn't expect to be talkin' to you so early this Christmas +mornin', but things has been sprung on me, and I can't help it I just +want to ask you one thing: Did you think I was gettin' up this +Christmas tree and the Christmas dinner and the whole business fer the +good of the little gal, and fer the good of you, and fer the good of +Captain Cephas?" + +Mrs. Trimmer had now recovered a very fair possession of herself. "Of +course I did," she answered, looking up at him as she spoke. "Who else +could it have been for!" + +"Well," said he, "you were mistaken. It wasn't fer any one of you. It +was all fer me--fer my own self." + +"You yourself?" said she. "I don't see how." + +"But I see how," he answered. "It's been a long time since I wanted to +speak my mind to you, Mrs. Trimmer, but I didn't ever have no chance. +And all these Christmas doin's was got up to give me the chance not +only of speakin' to you, but of showin' my colors better than I could +show them in any other way. Everything went on a-skimmin' till this +mornin', when that stranger that we brought in from the shoal piped up +and asked fer you. Then I went overboard--at least, I thought I +did--and sunk down, down, clean out of soundin's." + +"That was too bad, captain," said she, speaking very gently, "after all +your trouble and kindness." + +"But I don't know now," he continued, "whether I went overboard or +whether I am on deck. Can you tell me, Mrs. Trimmer?" + +She looked up at him. Her eyes were very soft, and her lips trembled +just a little. "It seems to me, captain," she said, "that you are on +deck--if you want to be." + +The captain stepped closer to her. "Mrs. Trimmer," said he, "is that +brother of yours comin' back?" + +"Yes," she answered, surprised at the sudden question. "He's just gone +up to the store to buy a shirt and some things. He got himself +splashed trying to push his boat off last night." + +"Well, then," said Captain Eli, "would you mind tellin' him when he +comes back that you and me's engaged to be married? I don't know +whether I've made a mistake in the lights or not, but would you mind +tellin' him that?" + +Mrs. Trimmer looked at him. Her eyes were not so soft as they had +been, but they were brighter. "I'd rather you'd tell him that +yourself," said she. + +The little girl sat on the floor near the Christmas tree, just +finishing a large piece of red-and-white candy which she had taken out +of her stocking. "People do hug a lot at Christmas-time," said she to +herself. Then she drew out a piece of blue-and-white candy and began +on that. + +Captain Cephas waited a long time for his friend to return, and at last +he thought it would be well to go and look for him. When he entered +the house he found Mrs. Trimmer sitting on the sofa in the parlor, with +Captain Eli on one side of her and her brother on the other, and each +of them holding one of her hands. + +"It looks as if I was in port, don't it?" said Captain Eli to his +astonished friend. "Well, here I am, and here's my fust mate," +inclining his head toward Mrs. Trimmer. "And she's in port too, safe +and sound. And that strange captain on the other side of her, he's her +brother Bob, who's been away for years and years, and is just home from +Madagascar." + +"Singapore," amended Brother Bob. + +Captain Cephas looked from one to the other of the three occupants of +the sofa, but made no immediate remark. Presently a smile of genial +maliciousness stole over his face, and he asked, "How about the poor +little gal? Have you sent her back to Mrs. Crumley's?" + +The little girl came out from behind the Christmas tree, her stocking, +now but half filled, in her hand. "Here I am," she said. "Don't you +want to give me a Christmas hug, Captain Cephas? You and me's the only +ones that hasn't had any." + +The Christmas dinner was as truly and perfectly a sailor-cooked meal as +ever was served on board a ship or off it. Captain Cephas had said +that, and when he had so spoken there was no need of further words. + +It was nearly dark that afternoon, and they were all sitting around the +kitchen fire, the three seafaring men smoking, and Mrs. Trimmer greatly +enjoying it. There could be no objection to the smell of tobacco in +this house so long as its future mistress enjoyed it. The little girl +sat on the floor nursing a Chinese idol which had been one of her +presents. + +"After all," said Captain Eli, meditatively, "this whole business come +out of my sleepin' with my best ear up. Fer if I'd slept with my +hard-o'-hearin' ear up--" Mrs. Trimmer put one finger on his lips. +"All right," said Captain Eli, "I won't say no more. But it would have +been different." + +Even now, several years after that Christmas, when there is no Mrs. +Trimmer, and the little girl, who has been regularly adopted by Captain +Eli and his wife, is studying geography, and knows more about latitude +and longitude than her teacher at school, Captain Eli has still a +slight superstitious dread of sleeping with his best ear uppermost. + +"Of course it's the most all-fired nonsense," he says to himself over +and over again. Nevertheless, he feels safer when it is his +"hard-o'-hearin' ear" that is not upon the pillow. + + + + +LOVE BEFORE BREAKFAST + +I was still a young man when I came into the possession of an excellent +estate. This consisted of a large country house, surrounded by lawns, +groves, and gardens, and situated not far from the flourishing little +town of Boynton. Being an orphan with no brothers or sisters, I set up +here a bachelor's hall, in which, for two years, I lived with great +satisfaction and comfort, improving my grounds and furnishing my house. +When I had made all the improvements which were really needed, and +feeling that I now had a most delightful home to come back to, I +thought it would be an excellent thing to take a trip to Europe, give +my mind a run in fresh fields, and pick up a lot of bric-a-brac and +ideas for the adornment and advantage of my house and mind. + +It was the custom of the residents in my neighborhood who owned houses +and travelled in the summer to let their houses during their absence, +and my business agent and myself agreed that this would be an excellent +thing for me to do. If the house were let to a suitable family it +would yield me a considerable income, and the place would not present +on my return that air of retrogression and desolation which I might +expect if it were left unoccupied and in charge of a caretaker. + +My agent assured me that I would have no trouble whatever in letting my +place, for it offered many advantages and I expected but a reasonable +rent. I desired to leave everything just as it stood, house, +furniture, books, horses, cows, and poultry, taking with me only my +clothes and personal requisites, and I desired tenants who would come +in bringing only their clothes and personal requisites, which they +could quietly take away with them when their lease should expire and I +should return home. + +In spite, however, of the assurances of the agent, it was not easy to +let my place. The house was too large for some people, too small for +others, and while some applicants had more horses than I had stalls in +my stable, others did not want even the horses I would leave. I had +engaged my steamer passage, and the day for my departure drew near, and +yet no suitable tenants had presented themselves. I had almost come to +the conclusion that the whole matter would have to be left in the hands +of my agent, for I had no intention whatever of giving up my projected +travels, when early one afternoon some people came to look at the +house. Fortunately I was at home, and I gave myself the pleasure of +personally conducting them about the premises. It was a pleasure, +because as soon as I comprehended the fact that these applicants +desired to rent my house I wished them to have it. + +The family consisted of an elderly gentleman and his wife, with a +daughter of twenty or thereabout. This was a family that suited me +exactly. Three in number, no children, people of intelligence and +position, fond of the country, and anxious for just such a place as I +offered them--what could be better? + +The more I walked about and talked with these good people and showed +them my possessions, the more I desired that the young lady should take +my house. Of course her parents were included in this wish, but it was +for her ears that all my remarks were intended, although sometimes +addressed to the others, and she was the tenant I labored to obtain. I +say "labored" advisedly, because I racked my brain to think of +inducements which might bring them to a speedy and favorable decision. + +Apart from the obvious advantages of the arrangement, it would be a +positive delight to me during my summer wanderings in Europe to think +that that beautiful girl would be strolling through my grounds, +enjoying my flowers, and sitting with her book in the shady nooks I had +made so pleasant, lying in my hammocks, spending her evening hours in +my study, reading my books, writing at my desk, and perhaps musing in +my easy-chair. Before these applicants appeared it had sometimes +pained me to imagine strangers in my home; but no such thought crossed +my mind in regard to this young lady, who, if charming in the house and +on the lawn, grew positively entrancing when she saw my Jersey cows and +my two horses, regarding them with an admiration which even surpassed +my own. + +Long before we had completed the tour of inspection I had made up my +mind that this young lady should come to live in my house. If +obstacles should show themselves they should be removed. I would tear +down, I would build, I would paper and paint, I would put in all sorts +of electric bells, I would reduce the rent until it suited their +notions exactly, I would have my horses' tails banged if she liked that +kind of tails better than long ones--I would do anything to make them +definitely decide to take the place before they left me. I trembled to +think of her going elsewhere and giving other householders a chance to +tempt her. She had looked at a good many country houses, but it was +quite plain that none of them had pleased her so well as mine. + +I left them in my library to talk the matter over by themselves, and in +less than ten minutes the young lady herself came out on the lawn to +tell me that her father and mother had decided to take the place and +would like to speak with me. + +"I am so glad," she said as we went in. "I am sure I shall enjoy every +hour of our stay here. It is so different from anything we have yet +seen." + +When everything had been settled I wanted to take them again over the +place and point out a lot of things I had omitted. I particularly +wanted to show them some lovely walks in the woods. But there was no +time, for they had to catch a train. + +Her name was Vincent--Cora Vincent, as I discovered from her mother's +remarks. + +As soon as they departed I had my mare saddled and rode into town to +see my agent. I went into his office exultant. + +"I've let my house," I said, "and I want you to make out the lease and +have everything fixed and settled as soon as possible. This is the +address of my tenants." + +The agent asked me a good many questions, being particularly anxious to +know what rent had been agreed upon. + +"Heavens!" he exclaimed, when I mentioned the sum, "that is ever so +much less than I told you you could get. I am in communication now +with a party whom I know would pay you considerably more than these +people. Have you definitely settled with them? Perhaps it is not too +late to withdraw." + +"Withdraw!" I cried. "Never! They are the only tenants I want. I was +determined to get them, and I think I must have lowered the rent four +or five times in the course of the afternoon. I took a big slice out +of it before I mentioned the sum at all. You see," said I, very +impressively, "these Vincents exactly suit me." And then I went on to +state fully the advantages of the arrangement, omitting, however, any +references to my visions of Miss Vincent swinging in my hammocks or +musing in my study-chair. + +It was now May 15, and my steamer would sail on the twenty-first. The +intervening days I employed, not in preparing for my travels, but in +making every possible arrangement for the comfort and convenience of my +incoming tenants. The Vincents did not wish to take possession until +June 1, and I was sorry they had not applied before I had engaged my +passage, for in that case I would have selected a later date. A very +good steamer sailed on June 3, and it would have suited me just as well. + +Happening to be in New York one day, I went to the Vincents' city +residence to consult with them in regard to some awnings which I +proposed putting up at the back of the house. I found no one at home +but the old gentleman, and it made no difference to him whether the +awnings were black and brown or red and yellow. I cordially invited +him to come out before I left, and bring his family, that they might +look about the place to see if there was anything they would like to +have done which had not already been attended to. It was so much +better, I told him, to talk over these matters personally with the +owner than with an agent in his absence. Agents were often very +unwilling to make changes. Mr. Vincent was a very quiet and +exceedingly pleasant elderly gentleman, and thanked me very much for my +invitation, but said he did not see how he could find the time to get +out to my house before I sailed. I did not like to say that it was not +at all necessary for him to neglect his affairs in order to accompany +his family to my place, but I assured him that if any of them wished to +go out at any time before they took possession they must feel at +perfect liberty to do so. + +I mentioned this matter to my agent, suggesting that if he happened to +be in New York he might call on the Vincents and repeat my invitation. +It was not likely that the old gentleman would remember to mention it +to his wife and daughter, and it was really important that everything +should be made satisfactory before I left. + +"It seems to me," he said, smiling a little grimly, "that the Vincents +had better be kept away from your house until you have gone. If you do +anything more to it you may find out that it would have been more +profitable to have shut it up while you are away." + +He did call, however, partly because I wished him to and partly because +he was curious to see the people I was so anxious to install in my +home, and to whom he was to be my legal representative. He reported +the next day that he had found no one at home but Miss Vincent, and +that she had said that she and her mother would be very glad to come +out the next week and go over the place before they took possession. + +"Next week!" I exclaimed. "I shall be gone then!" + +"But I shall be here," said Mr. Barker, "and I'll show them about and +take their suggestions." + +This did not suit me at all. It annoyed me very much to think of +Barker showing Miss Vincent about my place. He was a good-looking +young man and not at all backward in his manners. + +"After all," said I, "I suppose that everything that ought to be done +has been done. I hope you told her that." + +"Of course not," said he. "That would have been running dead against +your orders. Besides, it's my business to show people about places. I +don't mind it." + +This gave me an unpleasant and uneasy feeling. I wondered if Mr. +Barker were the agent I ought to have, and if a middle-aged man with a +family and more experience might not be better able to manage my +affairs. + +"Barker," said I, a little later, "there will be no use of your going +every month to the Vincents to collect their rent. I shall write to +Mr. Vincent to pay as he pleases. He can send a check monthly or at +the end of the season, as it may be convenient. He is perfectly +responsible, and I would much prefer to have the money in a lump when I +come back." + +Barker grinned. "All right," said he, "but that's not the way to do +business, you know." + +I may have been mistaken, but I fancied that I saw in my agent's face +an expression which indicated that he intended to call on the first day +of each month, on the pretext of telling Vincent that it was not +necessary to pay the rent at any particular time, and that he also +proposed to make many other intervening visits to inquire if repairs +were needed. This might have been a good deal to get out of his +expression, but I think I could have got more if I had thought longer. + +On the day before that on which I was to sail, my mind was in such a +disturbed condition that I could not attend to my packing or anything +else. It almost enraged me to think that I was deliberately leaving +the country ten days before my tenants would come to my house. There +was no reason why I should do this. There were many reasons why I +should not. There was Barker. I was now of the opinion that he would +personally superintend the removal of the Vincents and their +establishment to my home. I remembered that the only suggestion he had +made about the improvement of the place had been the construction of a +tennis-court. I knew that he was a champion player. Confound it! +What a dreadful mistake I had made in selecting such a man for my +house-agent. With my mind's eye I could already see Miss Vincent and +Barker selecting a spot for tennis and planning the arrangements of the +court. + +I took the first train to New York and went directly to the steamboat +office. It is astonishing how many obstacles can be removed from a +man's path if he will make up his mind to give them a good kick. I +found that my steamer was crowded. The applications for passage +exceeded the accommodations, and the agent was delighted to transfer me +to the steamer that sailed on June 3. I went home exultant. Barker +drove over in the evening to take his last instructions, and a blank +look came over his face when I told him that business had delayed my +departure, and that I should not sail the next day. If I had told him +that part of that business was the laying out of a tennis-court he +might have looked blanker. + +Of course the date of my departure did not concern the Vincents, +provided the house was vacated by June 1, and I did not inform them of +the change in my plans, but when the mother and daughter came out the +next week they were much surprised to find me waiting to receive them +instead of Barker. I hope that they were also pleased, and I am sure +that they had every reason to be so. Mrs. Vincent, having discovered +that I was a most complacent landlord, accommodated herself easily to +my disposition and made a number of minor requirements, all of which I +granted without the slightest hesitation. I was delighted at last to +put her into the charge of my housekeeper, and when the two had betaken +themselves to the bedrooms I invited Miss Vincent to come out with me +to select a spot for a tennis-court. The invitation was accepted with +alacrity, for tennis, she declared, was a passion with her. + +The selection of that tennis-court took nearly an hour, for there were +several good places for one and it was hard to make a selection; +besides, I could not lose the opportunity of taking Miss Vincent into +the woods and showing her the walks I had made and the rustic seats I +had placed in pleasant nooks. Of course she would have discovered +these, but it was a great deal better for her to know all about them +before she came. At last Mrs. Vincent sent a maid to tell her daughter +that it was time to go for the train, and the court had not been +definitely planned. + +The next day I went to Miss Vincent's house with a plan of the grounds, +and she and I talked it over until the matter was settled. It was +necessary to be prompt about this, I explained, as there would be a +great deal of levelling and rolling to be done. + +I also had a talk with the old gentleman about books. There were +several large boxes of my books in New York which I had never sent out +to my country house. Many of these I thought might be interesting to +him, and I offered to have them taken out and left at his disposal. +When he heard the titles of some of the books in the collection he was +much interested, but insisted that before he made use of them they +should be catalogued, as were the rest of my effects. I hesitated a +moment, wondering if I could induce Barker to come to New York and +catalogue four big boxes of books, when, to my surprise, Miss Vincent +incidentally remarked that if they were in any place where she could +get at them she would be pleased to help catalogue them; that sort of +thing was a great pleasure to her. Instantly I proposed that I should +send the books to the Vincent house, that they should there be taken +out so that Mr. Vincent could select those he might care to read during +the summer, that I would make a list of these, and if Vincent would +assist me I would be grateful for the kindness, and those that were not +desired could be returned to the storehouse. + +What a grand idea was this! I had been internally groaning because I +could think of no possible pretence, for further interviews with Miss +Vincent, and here was something better than I could have imagined. Her +father declared that he could not put me to so much trouble, but I +would listen to none of his words, and the next morning my books were +spread over his library floor. + +The selection and cataloguing of the volumes desired occupied the +mornings of three days. The old gentleman's part was soon done, but +there were many things in the books which were far more interesting to +me than their titles, and to which I desired to draw Miss Vincent's +attention. All this greatly protracted our labors. She was not only a +beautiful girl, but her intelligence and intellectual grasp were +wonderful. I could not help telling her what a great pleasure it would +be to me to think, while wandering in foreign lands, that such an +appreciative family would be enjoying my books and my place. + +"You are so fond of your house and everything you have," said she, +"that we shall almost feel as if we were depriving you of your rights. +But I suppose that Italian lakes and the Alps will make you forget for +a time even your beautiful home." + +"Not if you are in it," I longed to say, but I restrained myself. I +did not believe that it was possible for me to be more in love with +this girl than I was at that moment, but, of course, it would be the +rankest stupidity to tell her so. To her I was simply her father's +landlord. + +I went to that house the next day to see that the boxes were +properly repacked, and I actually went the next day to see if the right +boxes had gone into the country, and the others back to the storehouse. +The first day I saw only the father. The second day it was the mother +who assured me that everything had been properly attended to. I began +to feel that if I did not wish a decided rebuff I would better not make +any more pretences of business at the Vincent house. + +There were affairs of my own which should have been attended to, and I +ought to have gone home and attended to them, but I could not bear to +do so. There was no reason to suppose she would go out there before +the first of June. + +Thinking over the matter many times, I came to the conclusion that if I +could see her once more I would be satisfied. Then I would go away, +and carry her image with me into every art-gallery, over every glacier, +and under every lovely sky that I should enjoy abroad, hoping all the +time that, taking my place, as it were, in my home, and making my +possessions, in a measure, her own, she would indirectly become so well +acquainted with me that when I returned I might speak to her without +shocking her. + +To obtain this final interview there was but one way. I had left my +house on Saturday, the Vincents would come on the following Monday, and +I would sail on Wednesday. I would go on Tuesday to inquire if they +found everything to their satisfaction. This would be a very proper +attention from a landlord about to leave the country. + +When I reached Boynton I determined to walk to my house, for I did not +wish to encumber myself with a hired vehicle. I might be asked to stay +to luncheon. A very strange feeling came over me as I entered my +grounds. They were not mine. For the time being they belonged to +somebody else. I was merely a visitor or a trespasser if the Vincents +thought proper so to consider me. If they did not like people to walk +on the grass I had no right to do it. + +None of my servants had been left on the place, and the maid who came +to the door informed me that Mr. Vincent had gone to New York that +morning, and that Mrs. Vincent and her daughter were out driving. I +ventured to ask if she thought they would soon return, and she answered +that she did not think they would, as they had gone to Rock Lake, +which, from the way they talked about it, must be a long way off. + +Rock Lake! When I had driven over there with my friends, we had taken +luncheon at the inn and returned in the afternoon. And what did they +know of Rock Lake? Who had told them of it? That officious Barker, of +course. + +"Will you leave a message, sir?" said the maid, who, of course, did not +know me. + +"No," said I, and as I still stood gazing at the piazza floor, she +remarked that if I wished to call again she would go out and speak to +the coachman and ask him if anything had been said to him about the +time of the party's return. + +Worse and worse! Their coachman had not driven them! Some one who +knew the country had been their companion. They were not acquainted in +the neighborhood, and there could not be a shadow of a doubt that it +was that obtrusive Barker who had indecently thrust himself upon them +on the very next day after their arrival, and had thus snatched from me +this last interview upon which I had counted so earnestly. + +I had no right to ask any more questions. I left no message nor any +name, and I had no excuse for saying I would call again. + +I got back to my hotel without having met any one whom I knew, and that +night I received a note from Barker, stating that he had fully intended +coming to the steamer to see me off, but that an engagement would +prevent him. He sent, however, his best good wishes for my safe +passage, and assured me that he would keep me fully informed of the +state of my affairs on this side. + +"Engagement!" I exclaimed. "Is he going to drive with her again +to-morrow?" + +My steamer sailed at two o'clock the next day, and after an early +breakfast I went to the company's office to see if I could dispose of +my ticket. It had become impossible, I told the agent, for me to leave +America at present. He said it was a very late hour to sell my ticket, +but that he would do what he could, and if an applicant turned up he +would give him my room and refund the money. He wanted me to change to +another date, but I declined to do this. I was not able to say when I +should sail. + +I now had no plan of action. All I knew was that I could not leave +America without finding out something definite about this Barker +business. That is to say, if it should be made known to me that +instead of attending to my business, sending a carpenter to make +repairs, if such were necessary, or going personally to the plumber to +make sure that that erratic personage would give his attention to any +pipes in regard to which Mr. Vincent might have written, Barker should +mingle in sociable relations with my tenants, and drive or play tennis +with the young lady of the house, then would I immediately have done +with him. I would withdraw my business from his hands and place it in +those of old Mr. Poindexter. More than that, it might be my duty to +warn Miss Vincent's parents against Barker. I did not doubt that he +was a very good house and land-agent, but in selecting him as such I +had no idea of introducing him to the Vincents in a social way. In +fact, the more I thought about it the more I became convinced that if +ever I mentioned Barker to my tenants it would be to warn them against +him. From certain points of view he was actually a dangerous man. + +This, however, I would not do until I found my agent was really +culpable. To discover what Barker had done, what he was doing, and +what he intended to do, was now my only business in life. Until I had +satisfied myself on these points I could not think of starting out upon +my travels. + +Now that I had determined I would not start for Europe until I had +satisfied myself that Mr. Barker was contenting himself with attending +to my business, and not endeavoring to force himself into social +relations with my tenants, I was anxious that the postponement of my +journey should be unknown to my friends and acquaintances, and I was, +therefore, very glad to see in a newspaper, published on the afternoon +of the day of my intended departure, my name among the list of +passengers who had sailed upon the Mnemonic. For the first time I +commended the super-enterprise of a reporter who gave more attention to +the timeliness of his news than to its accuracy. + +I was stopping at a New York hotel, but I did not wish to stay there. +Until I felt myself ready to start on my travels the neighborhood of +Boynton would suit me better than anywhere else. I did not wish to go +to the town itself, for Barker lived there, and I knew many of the +townspeople; but there were farmhouses not far away where I might spend +a week. After considering the matter, I thought of something that +might suit me. About three miles from my house, on an unfrequented +road, was a mill which stood at the end of an extensive sheet of water, +in reality a mill-pond, but commonly called a lake. The miller, an old +man, had recently died, and his house near by was occupied by a +newcomer whom I had never seen. If I could get accommodations there it +would suit me exactly. I left the train two stations below Boynton and +walked over to the mill. + +The country-folk in my neighborhood are always pleased to take summer +boarders if they can get them, and the miller and his wife were glad to +give me a room, not imagining that I was the owner of a good house not +far away. The place suited my requirements very well. It was near +her, and I might live here for a time unnoticed, but what I was going +to do with my opportunity I did not know. Several times the conviction +forced itself upon me that I should get up at once and go to Europe by +the first steamer, and so show myself that I was a man of sense. + +This conviction was banished on the second afternoon of my stay at the +mill. I was sitting under a tree in the orchard near the house, +thinking and smoking my pipe, when along the road which ran by the side +of the lake came Mr. Vincent on my black horse General and his daughter +on my mare Sappho. Instinctively I pulled my straw hat over my eyes, +but this precaution was not necessary. They were looking at the +beautiful lake, with its hills and overhanging trees, and saw me not! + +When the very tip of Sappho's tail had melted into the foliage of the +road, I arose to my feet and took a deep breath of the happy air. I +had seen her, and it was with her father she was riding. + +I do not believe I slept a minute that night through thinking of her, +and feeling glad that I was near her, and that she had been riding with +her father. + +When the early dawn began to break an idea brighter than the dawn broke +upon me: I would get up and go nearer to her. It is amazing how much +we lose by not getting up early on the long summer days. How beautiful +the morning might be on this earth I never knew until I found myself +wandering by the edge of my woods and over my lawn with the tender +gray-blue sky above me and all the freshness of the grass and flowers +and trees about me, the birds singing among the branches, and she +sleeping sweetly somewhere within that house with its softly defined +lights and shadows. How I wished I knew what room she occupied! + +The beauties and joys of that hour were lost to every person on the +place, who were all, no doubt, in their soundest sleep. I did not even +see a dog. Quietly and stealthily stepping from bush to hedge, I went +around the house, and as I drew near the barn I fancied I could hear +from a little room adjoining it the snores of the coachman. The lazy +rascal would probably not awaken for two or three hours yet, but I +would ran no risks, and in half an hour I had sped away. + +Now I knew exactly why I was staying at the house of the miller. I was +doing so in order that I might go early in the mornings to my own home, +in which the girl I loved lay dreaming, and that for the rest of the +day and much of the night I might think of her. + +"What place in Europe," I said to myself, "could be so beautiful, so +charming, and so helpful to reflection as this sequestered lake, these +noble trees, these stretches of undulating meadow?" + +Even if I should care to go abroad, a month or two later would answer +all my purposes. Why had I ever thought of spending five months away? + +There was a pretty stream which ran from the lake and wended its way +through a green and shaded valley, and here, with a rod, I wandered and +fished and thought. The miller had boats, and in one of these I rowed +far up the lake where it narrowed into a creek, and between the high +hills which shut me out from the world I would float and think. + +Every morning, soon after break of day, I went to my home and wandered +about my grounds. If it rained I did not mind that. I like a summer +rain. + +Day by day I grew bolder. Nobody in that household thought of getting +up until seven o'clock. For two hours, at least, I could ramble +undisturbed through my grounds, and much as I had once enjoyed these +grounds, they never afforded me the pleasure they gave me now. In +these happy mornings I felt all the life and spirits of a boy. I went +into my little field and stroked the sleek sides of my cows as they +nibbled the dewy grass. I even peeped through the barred window of +Sappho's box and fed her, as I had been used to doing, with bunches of +clover. I saw that the young chickens were flourishing. I went into +the garden and noted the growth of the vegetables, feeling glad that +she would have so many fine strawberries and tender peas. + +I had not the slightest doubt that she was fond of flowers, and for her +sake now, as I used to do for my own sake, I visited the flower beds +and borders. Not far from the house there was a cluster of +old-fashioned pinks which I was sure were not doing very well. They +had been there too long, perhaps, and they looked stunted and weak. In +the miller's garden I had noticed great beds of these pinks, and I +asked his wife if I might have some, and she, considering them as mere +wild flowers, said I might have as many as I liked. She might have +thought I wanted simply the blossoms, but the next morning I went over +to my house with a basket filled with great matted masses of the plants +taken up with the roots and plenty of earth around them, and after +twenty minutes' work in my own bed of pinks, I had taken out all the +old plants and filled their places with fresh, luxuriant masses of buds +and leaves and blossoms. How glad she would be when she saw the fresh +life that had come to that flower-bed! With light footsteps I went +away, not feeling the weight of the basket filled with the old plants +and roots. + +The summer grew and strengthened, and the sun rose earlier, but as that +had no effect upon the rising of the present inhabitants of my place, +it gave me more time for my morning pursuits. Gradually I constituted +myself the regular flower-gardener of the premises. How delightful the +work was, and how foolish I thought I had been never to think of doing +this thing for myself! but no doubt it was because I was doing it for +her that I found it so pleasant. + +Once again I had seen Miss Vincent. It was in the afternoon, and I had +rowed myself to the upper part of the lake, where, with the high hills +and the trees on each side of me, I felt as if I were alone in the +world. Floating, idly along, with my thoughts about three miles away, +I heard the sound of oars, and looking out on the open part of the +lake, I saw a boat approaching. The miller was rowing, and in the +stern sat an elderly gentleman and a young lady. I knew them in an +instant: they were Mr. and Miss Vincent. + +With a few vigorous strokes I shot myself into the shadows, and rowed +up the stream into the narrow stretches among the lily-pads, under a +bridge, and around a little wooded point, where I ran the boat ashore +and sprang upon the grassy bank. Although I did not believe the miller +would bring them as far as this, I went up to a higher spot and watched +for half an hour; but I did not see them again. How relieved I was! +It would have been terribly embarrassing had they discovered me. And +how disappointed I was that the miller turned back so soon! + +I now extended the supervision of my grounds. I walked through the +woods, and saw how beautiful they were in the early dawn. I threw +aside the fallen twigs and cut away encroaching saplings, which were +beginning to encumber the paths I had made, and if I found a bough +which hung too low I cut it off. There was a great beech-tree, between +which and a dogwood I had the year before suspended a hammock. In +passing this, one morning, I was amazed to see a hammock swinging from +the hooks I had put in the two trees. This was a retreat which I had +supposed no one else would fancy or even think of! In the hammock was +a fan--a common Japanese fan. For fifteen minutes I stood looking at +that hammock, every nerve a-tingle. Then I glanced around. The spot +had been almost unfrequented since last summer. Little bushes, weeds, +and vines had sprung up here and there between the two trees. There +were dead twigs and limbs lying about, and the short path to the main +walk was much overgrown. + +I looked at my watch. It was a quarter to six. I had yet a good hour +for work, and with nothing but my pocket-knife and my hands I began to +clear away the space about that hammock. When I left it, it looked as +it used to look when it was my pleasure to lie there and swing and read +and reflect. + +To approach this spot it was not necessary to go through my grounds, +for my bit of woods adjoined a considerable stretch of forest-land, and +in my morning walks from the mill I often used a path through these +woods. The next morning when I took this path I was late because I had +unfortunately overslept myself. When I reached the hammock it wanted +fifteen minutes to seven o'clock. It was too late for me to do +anything, but I was glad to be able to stay there even for a few +minutes, to breathe that air, to stand on that ground, to touch that +hammock. I did more than that. Why shouldn't I? I got into it. It +was a better one than that I had hung there. It was delightfully +comfortable. At this moment, gently swinging in that woodland +solitude, with the sweet odors of the morning all about me, I felt +myself nearer to her than I had ever been before. + +But I knew I must not revel in this place too long. I was on the point +of rising to leave when I heard approaching footsteps. My breath +stopped. Was I at last to be discovered? This was what came of my +reckless security. But perhaps the person, some workman most likely, +would pass without noticing me. To remain quiet seemed the best +course, and I lay motionless. + +But the person approaching turned into the little pathway. The +footsteps came nearer. I sprang from the hammock. Before me was Miss +Vincent! + +What was my aspect I know not, but I have no doubt I turned fiery red. +She stopped suddenly, but she did not turn red. + +"Oh, Mr. Ripley," she exclaimed, "good morning! You must excuse me. I +did not know--" + +That she should have had sufficient self-possession to say good morning +amazed me. Her whole appearance, in fact, amazed me. There seemed to +be something wanting in her manner. I endeavored to get myself into +condition. + +"You must be surprised," I said, "to see me here. You supposed I was +in Europe, but--" + +As I spoke I made a couple of steps toward her, but suddenly stopped. +One of my coat buttons had caught in the meshes of the hammock. It was +confoundedly awkward. I tried to loosen the button, but it was badly +entangled. Then I desperately pulled at it to tear it off. + +"Oh, don't do that," she said. "Let me unfasten it for you." And +taking the threads of the hammock in one of her little hands and the +button in the other, she quickly separated them. "I should think +buttons would be very inconvenient things--at least, in hammocks," she +said smiling. "You see, girls don't have any such trouble." + +I could not understand her manner. She seemed to take my being there +as a matter of course. + +"I must beg a thousand pardons for this--this trespass," I said. + +"Trespass!" said she, with a smile. "People don't trespass on their +own land--" + +"But it is not my land," said I. "It is your father's for the time +being. I have no right here whatever. I do not know how to explain, +but you must think it very strange to find me here when you supposed I +had started for Europe." + +"Oh! I knew you had not started for Europe," said she, "because I have +seen you working in the grounds--" + +"Seen me!" I interrupted. "Is it possible?" + +"Oh, yes," said she. "I don't know how long you had been coming when I +first saw you, but when I found that fresh bed of pinks all +transplanted from somewhere, and just as lovely as they could be, +instead of the old ones, I spoke to the man; but he did not know +anything about it, and said he had not had time to do anything to the +flowers, whereas I had been giving him credit for ever so much weeding +and cleaning up. Then I supposed that Mr. Barker, who is just as kind +and attentive as he can be, had done it; but I could hardly believe he +was the sort of man to come early in the morning and work out of +doors,"--("Oh, how I wish he had come!" I thought. "If I had caught +him here working among the flowers!"),--"and when he came that +afternoon to play tennis I found that he had been away for two days, +and could not have planted the pinks. So I simply got up early one +morning and looked out, and there I saw you, with your coat off, +working just as hard as ever you could." + +I stepped back, my mind for a moment a perfect blank. + +"What could you have thought of me?" I exclaimed presently. + +"Really, at first I did not know what to think," said she. "Of course +I did not know what had detained you in this country, but I remembered +that I had heard that you were a very particular person about your +flowers and shrubs and grounds, and that most likely you thought they +would be better taken care of if you kept an eye on them, and that when +you found there was so much to do you just went to work and did it. I +did not speak of this to anybody, because if you did not wish it to be +known that you were taking care of the grounds it was not my business +to tell people about it. But yesterday, when I found this place where +I had hung my hammock so beautifully cleared up and made so nice and +clean and pleasant in every way, I thought I must come down to tell you +how much obliged I am, and also that you ought not to take so much +trouble for us. If you think the grounds need more attention, I will +persuade my father to hire another man, now and then, to work about the +place. Really, Mr. Ripley, you ought not to have to--" + +I was humbled, abashed. She had seen me at my morning devotions, and +this was the way she interpreted them. She considered me an overnice +fellow who was so desperately afraid his place would be injured that he +came sneaking around every morning to see if any damage had been done +and to put things to rights. + +She stood for a moment as if expecting me to speak, brushed a buzzing +fly from her sleeve, and then, looking at me with a gentle smile, she +turned a little as if she were about to leave. + +I could not let her go without telling her something. Her present +opinion of me must not rest in her mind another minute. And yet, what +story could I devise? How, indeed, could I devise anything with which +to deceive a girl who spoke and looked at me as this girl did? I could +not do it. I must rush away speechless and never see her again, or I +must tell her all. I came a little nearer to her. + +"Miss Vincent," said I, "you do not understand at all why I am +here--why I have been here so much--why I did not go to Europe. The +truth is, I could not leave. I do not wish to be away; I want to come +here and live here always--" + +"Oh, dear!" she interrupted, "of course it is natural that you should +not want to tear yourself away from your lovely home. It would be very +hard for us to go away now, especially for father and me, for we have +grown to love this place so much. But if you want us to leave, I dare +say--" + +"I want you to leave!" I exclaimed. "Never! When I say that I want to +live here myself, that my heart will not let me go anywhere else, I +mean that I want you to live here too--you, your mother and +father--that I want--" + + "Oh, that would be perfectly splendid!" she said. "I have +ever so often thought that it was a shame that you should be deprived +of the pleasures you so much enjoy, which I see you can find here and +nowhere else. Now, I have a plan which I think will work splendidly. +We are a very small family. Why shouldn't you come here and live with +us? There is plenty of room, and I know father and mother would be +very glad, and you can pay your board, if that would please you better. +You can have the room at the top of the tower for your study and your +smoking den, and the room under it can be your bedroom, so you can be +just as independent as you please of the rest of us, and you can be +living on your own place without interfering with us in the least. In +fact, it would be ever so nice, especially as I am in the habit of +going away to the sea-shore with my aunt every summer for six weeks, +and I was thinking how lonely it would be this year for father and +mother to stay here all by themselves." + +The tower and the room under it! For me! What a contemptibly +little-minded and insignificant person she must think me. The words +with which I strove to tell her that I wished to live here as lord, +with her as my queen, would not come. She looked at me for a moment as +I stood on the brink of saying something but not saying it, and then +she turned suddenly toward the hammock. + +"Did you see anything of a fan I left here?" she said. "I know I left +it here, but when I came yesterday it was gone. Perhaps you may have +noticed it somewhere--" + +Now, the morning before, I had taken that fan home with me. It was an +awkward thing to carry, but I had concealed it under my coat. It was a +contemptible trick, but the fan had her initials on it, and as it was +the only thing belonging to her of which I could possess myself, the +temptation had been too great to resist. As she stood waiting for my +answer there was a light in her eye which illuminated my perceptions. + +"Did you see me take that fan?" I asked. + +"I did," said she. + +"Then you know," I exclaimed, stepping nearer to her, "why it is I did +not leave this country as I intended, why it was impossible for me to +tear myself away from this house, why it is that I have been here every +morning, hovering around and doing the things I have been doing?" + +She looked up at me, and with her eyes she said, "How could I help +knowing?" She might have intended to say something with her lips, but +I took my answer from her eyes, and with the quick impulse of a lover I +stopped her speech. + +"You have strange ways," she said presently, blushing and gently +pressing back my arm. "I haven't told you a thing." + +"Let us tell each other everything now," I cried, and we seated +ourselves in the hammock. + +It was a quarter of an hour later and we were still sitting together in +the hammock. + +"You may think," said she, "that, knowing what I did, it was very queer +for me to come out to you this morning, but I could not help it. You +were getting dreadfully careless, and were staying so late and doing +things which people would have been bound to notice, especially as +father is always talking about our enjoying the fresh hours of the +morning, that I felt I could not let you go on any longer. And when it +came to that fan business I saw plainly that you must either +immediately start for Europe or--" + +"Or what?" I interrupted. + +"Or go to my father and regularly engage yourself as a--" + +I do not know whether she was going to say "gardener" or not, but it +did not matter. I stopped her. + +It was perhaps twenty minutes later, and we were standing together at +the edge of the woods. She wanted me to come to the house to take +breakfast with them. + +"Oh, I could not do that!" I said. "They would be so surprised. I +should have so much to explain before I could even begin to state my +case." + +"Well, then, explain," said she. "You will find father on the front +piazza. He is always there before breakfast, and there is plenty of +time. After all that has been said here, I cannot go to breakfast and +look commonplace while you run away." + +"But suppose your father objects?" said I. + +"Well, then you will have to go back and take breakfast with your +miller," said she. + +I never saw a family so little affected by surprises as those Vincents. +When I appeared on the front piazza the old gentleman did not jump. He +shook hands with me and asked me to sit down, and when I told him +everything he did not even ejaculate, but simply folded his hands +together and looked out over the railing. + +"It seemed strange to Mrs. Vincent and myself," he said, "when we first +noticed your extraordinary attachment for our daughter, but, after all, +it was natural enough." + +"Noticed it!" I exclaimed. "When did you do that?" + +"Very soon," he said. "When you and Cora were cataloguing the books at +my house in town I noticed it and spoke to Mrs. Vincent, but she said +it was nothing new to her, for it was plain enough on the day when we +first met you here that you were letting the house to Cora, and that +she had not spoken of it to me because she was afraid I might think it +wrong to accept the favorable and unusual arrangements you were making +with us if I suspected the reason for them. We talked over the matter, +but, of course, we could do nothing, because there was nothing to do, +and Mrs. Vincent was quite sure you would write to us from Europe. But +when my man Ambrose told me he had seen some one working about the +place in the very early morning, and that, as it was a gentleman, he +supposed it must be the landlord, for nobody else would be doing such +things, Mrs. Vincent and I looked out of the window the next day, and +when we found it was indeed you who were coming here every day, we felt +that the matter was serious and were a good deal troubled. We found, +however, that you were conducting affairs in a very honorable +way,--that you were not endeavoring to see Cora, and that you did not +try to have any secret correspondence with her,--and as we had no right +to prevent you from coming on your grounds, we concluded to remain +quiet until you should take some step which we would be authorized to +notice. Later, when Mr. Barker came and told me that you had not gone +to Europe, and were living with a miller not far from here--" + +"Barker!" I cried. "The scoundrel!" + +"You are mistaken, sir," said Mr. Vincent. "He spoke with the greatest +kindness of you, and said that as it was evident you had your own +reasons for wishing to stay in the neighborhood, and did not wish the +fact to be known, he had spoken of it to no one but me, and he would +not have done this had he not thought it would prevent embarrassment in +case we should meet." + +Would that everlasting Barker ever cease meddling in my affairs? + +"Do you suppose," I asked, "that he imagined the reason for my staying +here?" + +"I do not know," said the old gentleman, "but after the questions I put +to him I have no doubt he suspected it. I made many inquiries of him +regarding you, your family, habits, and disposition, for this was a +very vital matter to me, sir, and I am happy to inform you that he said +nothing of you that was not good, so I urged him to keep the matter to +himself. I determined, however, that if you continued your morning +visits I should take an early opportunity of accosting you and asking +an explanation." + +"And you never mentioned anything of this to your daughter?" said I. + +"Oh, no," he answered. "We carefully kept everything from her." + +"But, my dear sir," said I, rising, "you have given me no answer. You +have not told me whether or not you will accept me as a son-in-law." + +He smiled. "Truly," he said, "I have not answered you; but the fact +is, Mrs. Vincent and I have considered the matter so long, and having +come to the conclusion that if you made an honorable and +straightforward proposition, and if Cora were willing to accept you, we +could see no reason to object to--" + +At this moment the front door opened and Cora appeared. + +"Are you going to stay to breakfast?" she asked. "Because, if you are, +it is ready." + +I stayed to breakfast. + +I am now living in my own house, not in the two tower rooms, but in the +whole mansion, of which my former tenant, Cora, is now mistress +supreme. Mr. and Mrs. Vincent expect to spend the next summer here and +take care of the house while we are travelling. + +Mr. Barker, an excellent fellow and a most thorough business man, still +manages my affairs, and there is nothing on the place that flourishes +so vigorously as the bed of pinks which I got from the miller's wife. + +By the way, when I went back to my lodging on that eventful day, the +miller's wife met me at the door. + +"I kept your breakfast waitin' for you for a good while," said she, +"but as you didn't come, I supposed you were takin' breakfast in your +own house, and I cleared it away." + +"Do you know who I am?" I exclaimed. + +"Oh, yes, sir," she said. "We did not at first, but when everybody +began to talk about it we couldn't help knowin' it." + +"Everybody!" I gasped. "And may I ask what you and everybody said +about me?" + +"I think it was the general opinion, sir," said she, "that you were +suspicious of them tenants of yours, and nobody wondered at it, for +when city people gets into the country and on other people's property, +there's no trustin' them out of your sight for a minute." + +I could not let the good woman hold this opinion of my tenants, and I +briefly told her the truth. She looked at me with moist admiration in +her eyes. + +"I am glad to hear that, sir," said she. "I like it very much. But if +I was you I wouldn't be in a hurry to tell my husband and the people in +the neighborhood about it. They might be a little disappointed at +first, for they had a mighty high opinion of you when they thought that +you was layin' low here to keep an eye on them tenants of yours." + + + + +THE STAYING POWER OF SIR ROHAN + +During the winter in which I reached my twenty fifth year I lived with +my mother's brother, Dr. Alfred Morris, in Warburton, a small country +town, and I was there beginning the practice of medicine. I had been +graduated in the spring, and my uncle earnestly advised me to come to +him and act as his assistant, which advice, considering the fact that +he was an elderly man, and that I might hope to succeed him in his +excellent practice, was considered good advice by myself and my family. + +At this time I practised very little, but learned a great deal, for as +I often accompanied my uncle on his professional visits, I could not +have taken a better postgraduate course. + +I had an invitation to spend the Christmas of that year with the +Collingwoods, who had opened their country house, about twelve miles +from Warburton, for the entertainment of a holiday house party. I had +gladly accepted the invitation, and on the day before Christmas I went +to the livery stable in the village to hire a horse and sleigh for the +trip. At the stable I met Uncle Beamish, who had also come to hire a +conveyance. + +"Uncle Beamish," as he was generally called in the village, although I +am sure he had no nephews or nieces in the place, was an elderly man +who had retired from some business, I know not what, and was apparently +quite able to live upon whatever income he had. He was a good man, +rather illiterate, but very shrewd. Generous in good works, I do not +think he was fond of giving away money, but his services were at the +call of all who needed them. + +I liked Uncle Beamish very much, for he was not only a good +story-teller, but he was willing to listen to my stories, and when I +found he wanted to hire a horse and sleigh to go to the house of his +married sister, with whom he intended to spend Christmas, and that his +sister lived on Upper Hill turnpike, on which road the Collingwood +house was situated, I proposed that we should hire a sleigh together. + +"That will suit me," said Uncle Beamish. "There couldn't have been a +better fit if I had been measured for it. Less than half a mile after +you turn into the turnpike, you pass my sister's house. Then you can +drop me and go on to the Collingwoods', which I should say isn't more +than three miles further." + +The arrangement was made, a horse and sleigh ordered, and early in the +afternoon we started from Warburton. + +The sleighing was good, but the same could not be said of the horse. +He was a big roan, powerful and steady, but entirely too deliberate in +action. Uncle Beamish, however, was quite satisfied with him. + +"What you want when you are goin' to take a journey with a horse," said +he, "is stayin' power. Your fast trotter is all very well for a mile +or two, but if I have got to go into the country in winter, give me a +horse like this." + +I did not agree with him, but we jogged along quite pleasantly until +the afternoon grew prematurely dark and it began to snow. + +"Now," said I, giving the roan a useless cut, "what we ought to have is +a fast horse, so that we may get there before there is a storm." + +"No, doctor, you're wrong," said Uncle Beamish. "What we want is a +strong horse that will take us there whether it storms or not, and we +have got him. And who cares for a little snow that won't hurt nobody?" + +I did not care for snow, and we turned up our collars and went as +merrily as people can go to the music of slowly jingling sleigh-bells. + +The snow began to fall rapidly, and, what was worse, the wind blew +directly in our faces, so that sometimes my eyes were so plastered up +with snowflakes that I could scarcely see how to drive. I never knew +snow to fall with such violence. The roadway in front of us, as far as +I could see it, was soon one unbroken stretch of white from fence to +fence. + +"This is the big storm of the season," said Uncle Beamish, "and it is a +good thing we started in time, for if the wind keeps blowin', this road +will be pretty hard to travel in a couple of hours." + +In about half an hour the wind lulled a little and I could get a better +view of our surroundings, although I could not see very far through the +swiftly descending snow. + +"I was thinkin'," said Uncle Beamish, "that it might be a good idee, +when we get to Crocker's place, to stop a little, and let you warm your +fingers and nose. Crocker's is ruther more than half-way to the pike." + +"Oh, I do not want to stop anywhere," I replied quickly. "I am all +right." + +Nothing was said for some time, and then Uncle Beamish remarked: + +"I don't want to stop any more than you do, but it does seem strange +that we ain't passed Crocker's yit. We could hardly miss his house, it +is so close to the road. This horse is slow, but I tell you one thing, +doctor, he's improvin'. He is goin' better than he did. That's the +way with this kind. It takes them a good while to get warmed up, but +they keep on gettin' fresher instead of tireder." + +The big roan was going better, but still we did not reach Crocker's, +which disappointed Uncle Beamish, who wanted to be assured that the +greater part of his journey was over. + +"We must have passed it," he said, "when the snow was so blindin'." + +I did not wish to discourage him by saying that I did not think we had +yet reached Crocker's, but I believed I had a much better appreciation +of our horse's slowness than he had. + +Again the wind began to blow in our faces, and the snow fell faster, +but the violence of the storm seemed to encourage our horse, for his +pace was now greatly increased. + +"That's the sort of beast to have," exclaimed Uncle Beamish, +spluttering as the snow blew in his mouth. "He is gettin' his spirits +up just when they are most wanted. We must have passed Crocker's a +good while ago, and it can't be long before we get to the pike. And +it's time we was there, for it's darkenin'." + +On and on we went, but still we did not reach the pike. We had lost a +great deal of time during the first part of the journey, and although +the horse was travelling so much better now, his pace was below the +average of good roadsters. + +"When we get to the pike," said Uncle Beamish, "you can't miss it, for +this road doesn't cross it. All you've got to do is to turn to the +left, and in ten minutes you will see the lights in my sister's house. +And I'll tell you, doctor, if you would like to stop there for the +night, she'd be mighty glad to have you." + +"Much obliged," replied I, "but I shall go on. It's not late yet, and +I can reach the Collingwoods' in good time." + +We now drove on in silence, our horse actually arching his neck as he +thumped through the snow. Drifts had begun to form across the road, +but through these he bravely plunged. + +"Stayin' power is what we want, doctor!" exclaimed Uncle Beamish. +"Where would your fast trotter be in drifts like these, I'd like to +know? We got the right horse when we got this one, but I wish we had +been goin' this fast all the time." + +It grew darker and darker, but at last we saw, not far in front of us, +a light. + +"That beats me," said Uncle Beamish. "I don't remember no other house +so near the road. It can't be we ain't passed Crocker's yit! If we +ain't got no further than that, I'm in favor of stoppin'. I'm not +afraid of a snow-storm, but I ain't a fool nuther, and if we haven't +got further than Crocker's it will be foolhardy to try to push on +through the dark and these big drifts, which will be gettin' bigger." + +I did not give it up so easily. I greatly wished to` reach my +destination that night. But there were three wills in the party, and +one of them belonged to the horse. Before I had any idea of such a +thing, the animal made a sudden turn,--too sudden for safety,--passed +through a wide gateway, and after a few rapid bounds which, to my +surprise, I could not restrain, he stopped suddenly. + +"Hello!" exclaimed Uncle Beamish, peering forward, "here's a barn +door." And he immediately began to throw off the far robe that covered +our knees. + +"What are you going to do?" I asked. + +"I'm goin' to open the barn door and let the horse go in," said he. +"He seems to want to. I don't know whether this is Crocker's barn or +not. It don't look like it, but I may be mistaken. Anyway, we will +let the horse in, and then go to the house. This ain't no night to be +travellin' any further, doctor, and that is the long and the short of +it. If the people here ain't Crockers, I guess they are Christians!" + +I had not much time to consider the situation, for while he had been +speaking, Uncle Beamish had waded through the snow, and finding the +barn door unfastened, had slid it to one side. Instantly the horse +entered the dark barn, fortunately finding nothing in his way. + +"Now," said Uncle Beamish, "if we can get somethin' to tie him with, so +that he don't do no mischief, we can leave him here and go up to the +house." I carried a pocket lantern, and quickly lighted it. "By +George!" said Uncle Beamish, as I held up the lantern, "this ain't much +of a barn--it's no more than a wagon-house. It ain't Crocker's--but no +matter; we'll go up to the house. Here is a hitchin'-rope." + +We fastened the horse, threw a robe over him, shut the barn door behind +us, and slowly made our way to the back of the house, in which there +was a lighted window. Mounting a little portico, we reached a door, +and were about to knock when it was opened for us. A woman, plainly a +servant, stood in a kitchen, light and warm. + +"Come right in," she said. "I heard your bells. Did you put your +horse in the barn?" + +"Yes," said Uncle Beamish, "and now we would like to see--" + +"All right," interrupted the woman, moving toward an inner door. "Just +wait here for a minute. I'm going up to tell her." + +"I don't know this place," said Uncle Beamish, as we stood by the +kitchen stove, "but I expect it belongs to a widow woman." + +"What makes you think that?" I asked. + +"'Cause she said she was goin' to tell HER. If there had been a man in +the house, she would have gone to tell HIM." + +In a few moments the woman returned. + +"She says you are to take off your wet things and then go into the +sitting-room. She'll be down in a minute." + +I looked at Uncle Beamish, thinking it was his right to make +explanations, but, giving me a little wink, he began to take off his +overcoat. It was plain to perceive that Uncle Beamish desired to +assume that a place of refuge would be offered us. + +"It's an awful bad night," he said to the woman, as he sat down to take +off his arctic overshoes. + +"It's all that," said she. "You may hang your coats over them chairs. +It won't matter if they do drip on this bare floor. Now, then, come +right into the sitting-room." + +In spite of my disappointment, I was glad to be in a warm house, and +hoped we might be able to stay there. I could hear the storm beating +furiously against the window-panes behind the drawn shades. There was +a stove in the sitting-room, and a large lamp. + +"Sit down," said the woman. "She will be here in a minute." + +"It strikes me," said Uncle Beamish, when we were left alone, "that +somebody is expected in this house, most likely to spend Christmas, and +that we are mistook for them, whoever they are." + +"I have the same idea," I replied, "and we must explain as soon as +possible." + +"Of course we will do that," said he, "but I can tell you one thing: +whoever is expected ain't comin', for he can't get here. But we've got +to stay here tonight, no matter who comes or doesn't come, and we've +got to be keerful in speakin' to the woman of the house. If she is one +kind of a person, we can offer to pay for lodgin's and horse-feed; but +if she is another kind, we must steer clear of mentionin' pay, for it +will make her angry. You had better leave the explainin' business to +me." + +I was about to reply that I was more than willing to do so when the +door opened and a person entered--evidently the mistress of the house. +She was tall and thin, past middle age, and plainly dressed. Her pale +countenance wore a defiant look, and behind her spectacles blazed a +pair of dark eyes, which, after an instant's survey of her visitors, +were fixed steadily upon me. She made but a step into the room, and +stood holding the door. We both rose from our chairs. + +"You can sit down again," she said sharply to me. "I don't want you. +Now, sir," she continued, turning to Uncle Beamish, "please come with +me." + +Uncle Beamish gave a glance of surprise at me, but he immediately +followed the old lady out of the room, and the door was closed behind +them. + +For ten minutes, at least, I sat quietly waiting to see what would +happen next--very much surprised at the remark that had been made to +me, and wondering at Uncle Beamish's protracted absence. Suddenly he +entered the room and closed the door. + +"Here's a go!" said he, slapping his leg, but very gently. "We're +mistook the worst kind. We're mistook for doctors." "That is only half +a mistake," said I. "What is the matter, and what can I do?" + +"Nothin'," said he, quickly,--"that is, nothin' your own self. Just +the minute she got me outside that door she began pitchin' into you. +`I suppose that's young Dr. Glover,' said she. I told her it was, and +then she went on to say, givin' me no chance to explain nothin', that +she didn't want to have anything to do with you; that she thought it +was a shame to turn people's houses into paupers' hospitals for the +purpose of teachin' medical students; that she had heard of you, and +what she had heard she hadn't liked. All this time she kept goin' +upstairs, and I follerin' her, and the fust thing I knowed she opened a +door and went into a room, and I went in after her, and there, in a +bed, was a patient of some kind. I was took back dreadful, for the +state of the case came to me like a flash. Your uncle had been sent +for, and I was mistook for him. Now, what to say was a puzzle to me, +and I began to think pretty fast. It was an awkward business to have +to explain things to that sharp-set old woman. The fact is, I didn't +know how to begin, and was a good deal afraid, besides, but she didn't +give me no time for considerin'. `I think it's her brain,' said she, +`but perhaps you'll know better. Catherine, uncover your head!' And +with that the patient turned over a little and uncovered her head, +which she had had the sheet over. It was a young woman, and she gave +me a good look, but she didn't say nothin'. Now I WAS in a state of +mind." + +"Of course you must have been," I answered. "Why didn't you tell her +that you were not a doctor, but that I was. It would have been easy +enough to explain matters. She might have thought my uncle could not +come and he had sent me, and that you had come along for company. The +patient ought to be attended to without delay." + +"She's got to be-attended to," said Uncle Beamish, "or else there will +be a row and we'll have to travel--storm or no storm. But if you had +heard what that old woman said about young doctors, and you in +particular, you would know that you wasn't goin' to have anything to do +with this case--at least, you wouldn't show in it. But I've got no +more time for talkin'. I came down here on business. When the old +lady said, `Catherine, hold out your hand!' and she held it out, I had +nothin' to do but step up and feel her pulse. I know how to do that, +for I have done a lot of nussin' in my life. And then it seemed +nat'ral to ask her to put out her tongue, and when she did it I gave a +look at it and nodded my head. `Do you think it is her brain?' said +the old woman, half whisperin'. `Can't say anything about that yit,' +said I. `I must go down-stairs and get the medicine-case. The fust +thing to do is to give her a draught, and I will bring it up to her as +soon as it is mixed.' You have got a pocket medicine-case with you, +haven't you?" + +"Oh, yes," said I. "It is in my overcoat." + +"I knowed it," said Uncle Beamish. "An old doctor might go visitin' +without his medicine-case, but a young one would be sure to take it +along, no matter where he was goin'. Now you get it, please, quick." + +"My notion is," said he, when I returned from the kitchen with the +case, "that you mix somethin' that might soothe her a little, if she +has got anything the matter with her brain, and which won't hurt her if +she hasn't. And then, when I take it up to her, you tell me what +symptoms to look for. I can do it--I have spent nights lookin' for +symptoms. Then, when I come down and report, you might send her up +somethin' that would keep her from gettin' any wuss till the doctor can +come in the mornin', for he ain't comin' here to-night." + +"A very good plan," said I. "Now, what can I give her? What is the +patient's age?" + +"Oh, her age don't matter much," said Uncle Beamish, impatiently. "She +may be twenty, more or less, and any mild stuff will do to begin with." + +"I will give her some sweet spirits of nitre," said I, taking out a +little vial. "Will you ask the servant for a glass of water and a +teaspoon?" + +"Now," said I, when I had quickly prepared the mixture, "she can have a +teaspoonful of this, and another in ten minutes, and then we will see +whether we will go on with it or not." + +"And what am I to look for?" said he. + +"In the first place," said I, producing a clinical thermometer, "you +must take her temperature. You know how to do that?" + +"Oh, yes," said he. "I have done it hundreds of times. She must hold +it in her mouth five minutes." + +"Yes, and while you are waiting," I continued, "you must try to find +out, in the first place, if there are, or have been, any signs of +delirium. You might ask the old lady, and besides, you may be able to +judge for yourself." + +"I can do that," said he. "I have seen lots of it." + +"Then, again," said I, "you must observe whether or not her pupils are +dilated. You might also inquire whether there had been any partial +paralysis or numbness in any part of the body. These things must be +looked for in brain trouble. Then you can come down, ostensibly to +prepare another prescription, and when you have reported, I have no +doubt I can give you something which will modify, or I should say--" + +"Hold her where she is till mornin'," said Uncle Beamish. "That's what +you mean. Be quick. Give me that thermometer and the tumbler, and +when I come down again, I reckon you can fit her out with a +prescription just as good as anybody." + +He hurried away, and I sat down to consider. I was full of ambition, +full of enthusiasm for the practice of my profession. I would have +been willing to pay largely for the privilege of undertaking an +important case by myself, in which it would depend upon me whether or +not I should call in a consulting brother. So far, in the cases I had +undertaken, a consulting brother had always called himself in--that is, +I had practised in hospitals or with my uncle. Perhaps it might be +found necessary, notwithstanding all that had been said against me, +that I should go up to take charge of this case. I wished I had not +forgotten to ask the old man how he had found the tongue and pulse. + +In less than a quarter of an hour Uncle Beamish returned. + +"Well," said I, quickly, "what are the symptoms?" + +"I'll give them to you," said he, taking his seat. "I'm not in such a +hurry now, because I told the old woman I would like to wait a little +and see how that fust medicine acted. The patient spoke to me this +time. When I took the thermometer out of her mouth she says, `You are +comin' up ag'in, doctor?' speakin' low and quickish, as if she wanted +nobody but me to hear." + +"But how about the symptoms?" said I, impatiently. + +"Well," he answered, "in the fust place her temperature is ninety-eight +and a half, and that's about nat'ral, I take it." + +"Yes," I said, "but you didn't tell me about her tongue and pulse." + +"There wasn't nothin' remarkable about them," said he. + +"All of which means," I remarked, "that there is no fever. But that is +not at all a necessary accompaniment of brain derangements. How about +the dilatation of her pupils?" + +"There isn't none," said Uncle Beamish; "they are ruther squinched up, +if anything. And as to delirium, I couldn't see no signs of it, and +when I asked the old lady about the numbness, she said she didn't +believe there had been any." + +"No tendency to shiver, no disposition to stretch?" + +"No," said the old man, "no chance for quinine." + +"The trouble is," said I, standing before the stove and fixing my mind +upon the case with earnest intensity, "that there are so few symptoms +in brain derangement. If I could only get hold of something tangible--" + +"If I was you," interrupted Uncle Beamish, "I wouldn't try to get hold +of nothin'. I would just give her somethin' to keep her where she is +till mornin'. If you can do that, I'll guarantee that any good doctor +can take her up and go on with her to-morrow." + +Without noticing the implication contained in these remarks, I +continued my consideration of the case. + +"If I could get a drop of her blood," said I. + +"No, no!" exclaimed Uncle Beamish, "I'm not goin' to do anything of +that sort. What in the name of common sense would you do with her +blood?" + +"I would examine it microscopically," I said. "I might find out all I +want to know." + +Uncle Beamish did not sympathize with this method of diagnosis. + +"If you did find out there was the wrong kind of germs, you couldn't do +anything with them to-night, and it would just worry you," said the old +man. "I believe that nature will get along fust-rate without any help, +at least till mornin'. But you've got to give her some medicine--not +so much for her good as for our good. If she's not treated we're +bounced. Can't you give her somethin' that would do anybody good, no +matter what's the matter with 'em? If it was the spring of the year I +would say sarsaparilla. If you could mix her up somethin' and put into +it some of them benevolent microbes the doctors talk about, it would be +a good deed to do to anybody." + +"The benign bacilli," said I. "Unfortunately I haven't any of them +with me." + +"And if you had," he remarked, "I'd be in favor of givin' 'em to the +old woman. I take it they would do, her more good than anybody else. +Come along now, doctor; it is about time for me to go up-stairs and see +how the other stuff acted--not on the patient, I don't mean, but on the +old woman. The fact is, you know, it's her we're dosin'." + +"Not at all," said I, speaking a little severely. "I am trying to do +my very best for the patient, but I fear I cannot do it without seeing +her. Don't you think that if you told the old lady how absolutely +necessary--" + +"Don't say anything more about that!" exclaimed Uncle Beamish. "I +hoped I wouldn't have to mention it, but she told me ag'in that she +would never have one of those unfledged medical students, just out of +the egg-shell, experimentin' on any of her family, and from what she +said about you in particular, I should say she considered you as a +medical chick without even down on you." + +"What can she know of me?" I asked indignantly. + +"Give it up," said he. "Can't guess it. But that ain't the p'int. +The p'int is, what are you goin' to give her? When I was young the +doctors used to say, When you are in doubt, give calomel--as if you +were playin' trumps." + +"Nonsense, nonsense," said I, my eyes earnestly fixed upon my open +medical case. + +"I suppose a mustard-plaster on the back of her neck--" + +"Wouldn't do at all," I interrupted. "Wait a minute, now--yes--I know +what I will do: I will give her sodium bromide--ten grains." + +"`Which will hit if it's a deer and miss if it's a calf' as the hunter +said?" inquired Uncle Beamish. + +"It will certainly not injure her," said I, "and I am quite sure it +will be a positive advantage. If there has been cerebral disturbance, +which has subsided temporarily, it will assist her to tide over the +interim before its recurrence." + +"All right," said Uncle Beamish, "give it to me, and I'll be off. It's +time I showed up ag'in." + +He did not stay up-stairs very long this time. + +"No symptoms yit, but the patient looked at me as if she wanted to say +somethin'; but she didn't git no chance, for the old lady set herself +down as if she was planted in a garden-bed and intended to stay there. +But the patient took the medicine as mild as a lamb." + +"That is very good," said I. "It may be that she appreciates the +seriousness of her ewe better than we do." + +"I should say she wants to git well," he replied. "She looks like that +sort of a person to me. The old woman said she thought we would have +to stay awhile till the storm slackened, and I said, yes, indeed, and +there wasn't any chance of its slackenin' to-night; besides, I wanted +to see the patient before bedtime." + +At this moment the door opened and the servant-woman came in. + +"She says you are to have supper, and it will be ready in about half an +hour. One of you had better go out and attend to your horse, for the +man is not coming back to-night." + +"I will go to the barn," said I, rising. Uncle Beamish also rose and +said he would go with me. + +"I guess you can find some hay and oats," said the woman, as we were +putting on our coats and overshoes in the kitchen, "and here's a +lantern. We don't keep no horse now, but there's feed left." + +As we pushed through the deep snow into the barn, Uncle Beamish said: + +"I've been tryin' my best to think where we are without askin' any +questions, and I'm dead beat. I don't remember no such house as this +on the road." + +"Perhaps we got off the road," said I. + +"That may be," said he, as we entered the barn. "It's a straight road +from Warburton to the pike near my sister's house, but there's two +other roads that branch off to the right and strike the pike further +off to the east. Perhaps we got on one of them in all that darkness +and perplexin' whiteness, when it wasn't easy to see whether we were +keepin' a straight road or not." + +The horse neighed as we approached with a light. + +"I would not be at all surprised," said I, "if this horse had once +belonged here and that was the reason why, as soon as he got a chance, +he turned and made straight for his old home." + +"That isn't unlikely," said Uncle Beamish, "and that's the reason we +did not pass Crocker's. But here we are, wherever it is, and here +we've got to stay till mornin'." + +We found hay and oats and a pump in the corner of the wagon-house, and +having put the horse in the stall and made him as comfortable as +possible with some old blankets, we returned to the house, bringing our +valises with us. + +Our supper was served in the sitting-room because there was a good fire +there, and the servant told us we would have to eat by ourselves, as +"she" was not coming down. + +"We'll excuse her," said Uncle Beamish, with an alacrity of expression +that might have caused suspicion. + +We had a good supper, and were then shown a room on the first floor on +the other side of the hall, where the servant said we were to sleep. + +We sat by the stove awhile, waiting for developments, but as Uncle +Beamish's bedtime was rapidly approaching, he sent word to the +sick-chamber that he was coming up for his final visit. + +This time he stayed up-stairs but a few minutes. + +"She's fast asleep," said he, "and the old woman says she'll call me if +I'm needed in the night, and you'll have to jump up sharp and overhaul +that medicine-case if that happens." + +The next morning, and very early in the morning, I was awaked by Uncle +Beamish, who stood at my side. + +"Look here," said he, "I've been outside. It's stopped snowin' and +it's clearin' off. I've been to the barn and I've fed the horse, and I +tell you what I'm in favor of doin'. There's nobody up yit, and I +don't want to stay here and make no explanations to that old woman. I +don't fancy gittin' into rows on Christmas mornin'. We've done all the +good we can here, and the best thing we can do now is to git away +before anybody is up, and leave a note sayin' that we've got to go on +without losin' time, and that we will send another doctor as soon as +possible. My sister's doctor don't live fur away from her, and I know +she will be willin' to send for him. Then our duty will be done, and +what the old woman thinks of us won't make no, difference to nobody." + +"That plan suits me," said I, rising. "I don't want to stay here, and +as I am not to be allowed to see the patient, there is no reason why I +should stay. What we have done will more than pay for our supper and +lodgings, so that our consciences are clear." + +"But you must write a note," said Uncle Beamish. "Got any paper?" + +I tore a leaf from my note-book, and went to the window, where it was +barely light enough for me to see how to write. + +"Make it short," said the old man. "I'm awful fidgety to git off." + +I made it very short, and then, valises in hand, we quietly took our +way to the kitchen. + +"How this floor does creak!" said Uncle Beamish. "Git on your overcoat +and shoes as quick as you can, and we'll leave the note on this table." + +I had just shaken myself into my overcoat when Uncle Beamish gave a +subdued exclamation, and quickly turning, I saw entering the kitchen a +female figure in winter wraps and carrying a hand-bag. + +"By George!" whispered the old man, "it's the patient!" + +The figure advanced directly toward me. + +"Oh, Dr. Glover!" she whispered, "I am so glad to get down before you +went away!" + +I stared in amazement at the speaker, but even in the dim light I +recognized her. This was the human being whose expected presence at +the Collingwood mansion was taking me there to spend Christmas. + +"Kitty!" I exclaimed--"Miss Burroughs, I mean,--what is the meaning of +this?" + +"Don't ask me for any meanings now," she said. "I want you and your +uncle to take me to the Collingwoods'. I suppose you are on your way +there, for they wrote you were coming. And oh! let us be quick, for +I'm afraid Jane will come down, and she will be sure to wake up aunty. +I saw one of you go out to the barn, and knew you intended to leave, so +I got ready just as fast as I could. But I must leave some word for +aunty." + +"I have written a note," said I. "But are you well enough to travel?" + +"Just let me add a line to it," said she. "I am as well as I ever was." + +I gave her a pencil, and she hurriedly wrote something on the paper +which I had left on the kitchen table. Then, quickly glancing around, +she picked up a large carving-fork, and sticking it through the paper +into the soft wood of the table, she left it standing there. + +"Now it won't blow away when we open the door," she whispered. "Come +on." + +"You cannot go out to the barn," I said; "we will bring up the sleigh." + +"Oh, no, no, no," she answered, "I must not wait here. If I once get +out of the house I shall feel safe. Of course I shall go anyway, but I +don't want any quarrelling on this Christmas morning." + +"I'm with you there," said Uncle Beamish, approvingly. "Doctor, we can +take her to the barn without her touching the snow. Let her sit in +this arm-chair, and we can carry her between us. She's no weight." + +In half a minute the kitchen door was softly closed behind us, and we +were carrying Miss Burroughs to the barn. My soul was in a wild +tumult. Dozens of questions were on my tongue, but I had no chance to +ask any of them. + +Uncle Beamish and I returned to the porch for the valises, and then, +closing the back door, we rapidly began to make preparations for +leaving. + +"I suppose," said Uncle Beamish, as we went into the stable, leaving +Miss Burroughs in the wagon-house, "that this business is all right? +You seem to know the young woman, and she is of age to act for herself." + + "Whatever she wants to do," I answered, "is perfectly right. +You may trust to that. I do not understand the matter any more than +you do, but I know she is expected at the Collingwoods', and wants to +go there." + +"Very good," said Uncle Beamish. "We'll git away fust and ask +explanations afterwards." + +"Dr. Glover," said Miss Burroughs, as we led the horse into the +wagon-house, "don't put the bells on him. Stuff them gently under the +seat--as softly as you can. But how are we all to go away? I have +been looking at that sleigh, and it is intended only for two." + +"It's rather late to think of that, miss," said Uncle Beamish, "but +there's one thing that's certain. We're both very polite to ladies, +but neither of us is willin' to be left behind on this trip. But it's +a good-sized sleigh, and we'll all pack in, well enough. You and me +can sit on the seat, and the doctor can stand up in front of us and +drive. In old times it was considered the right thing for the driver +of the sleigh to stand up and do his drivin'." + +The baggage was carefully stowed away, and, after a look around the +dimly lighted wagon-house, Miss Burroughs and Uncle Beamish got into +the sleigh, and I tucked the big fur robe around them. + +"I hate to make a journey before breakfast," said Uncle Beamish, as I +was doing this, "especially on Christmas mornin', but somehow or other +there seems to be somethin' jolly about this business, and we won't +have to wait so long for breakfast, nuther. It can't be far from my +sister's, and we'll all stop there and have breakfast. Then you two +can leave me and go on. She'll be as glad to see any friends of mine +as if they were her own. And she'll be pretty sure, on a mornin' like +this, to have buckwheat cakes and sausages." + +Miss Burroughs looked at the old man with a puzzled air, but she asked +him no questions. + +"How are you going to keep yourself warm, Dr. Glover?" she said. + +"Oh, this long ulster will be enough for me," I replied, "and as I +shall stand up, I could not use a robe, if we had another." + +In fact, the thought of being with Miss Burroughs and the anticipation +of a sleigh-ride alone with her after we had left Uncle Beamish with +his sister, had put me into such a glow that I scarcely knew it was +cold weather. + +"You'd better be keerful, doctor," said Uncle Beamish. "You don't want +to git rheumatism in your j'ints on this Christmas mornin'. Here's +this horse-blanket that we are settin' on. We don't need it, and you'd +better wrap it round you, after you git in, to keep your legs warm." + +"Oh, do!" said Miss Burroughs. "It may look funny, but we will not +meet anybody so early as this." + +"All right!" said I, "and now we are ready to start." + +I slid back the barn door and then led the horse outside. Closing the +door, and making as little noise as possible in doing it, I got into +the sleigh, finding plenty of room to stand up in front of my +companions. Now I wrapped the horse-blanket about the lower part of my +body, and as I had no belt with which to secure it, Miss Burroughs +kindly offered to fasten it round my waist by means of a long pin which +she took from her hat. It is impossible to describe the exhilaration +that pervaded me as she performed this kindly office. After thanking +her warmly, I took the reins and we started. + +"It is so lucky," whispered Miss Burroughs, "that I happened to think +about the bells. We don't make any noise at all." + +This was true. The slowly uplifted hoofs of the horse descended +quietly into the soft snow, and the sleigh-runners slipped along +without a sound. + +"Drive straight for the gate, doctor," whispered Uncle Beamish. "It +don't matter nothin' about goin' over flower-beds and grass-plats in +such weather." + +I followed his advice, for no roadway could be seen. But we had gone +but a short distance when the horse suddenly stopped. + +"What's the matter?" asked Miss Burroughs, in a low voice. "Is it too +deep for him?" + +"We're in a drift," said Uncle Beamish. "But it's not too deep. Make +him go ahead, doctor." + +I clicked gently and tapped the horse with the whip, but he did not +move. + +"What a dreadful thing," whispered Miss Burroughs, leaning forward, +"for him to stop so near the house! Dr. Glover, what does this mean?" +And, as she spoke, she half rose behind me. "Where did Sir Rohan come +from?" + +"Who's he?" asked Uncle Beamish, quickly. + +"That horse," she answered. "That's my aunt's horse. She sold him a +few days ago." + +"By George!" ejaculated Uncle Beamish, unconsciously raising his voice +a little. "Wilson bought him, and his bringin' us here is as plain as +A B C. And now he don't want to leave home." + +"But he has got to do it," said I, jerking the horse's head to one side +and giving him a cut with the whip. + +"Don't whip him," whispered Miss Burroughs; "it always makes him more +stubborn. How glad I am I thought of the bells! The only way to get +him to go is to mollify him." + +"But how is that to be done?" I asked anxiously. + +"You must give him sugar and pat his neck. If I had some sugar and +could get out--" + +"But you haven't it, and you can't git out," said Uncle Beamish. "Try +him again doctor!" + +I jerked the reins impatiently. "Go along!" said I. But he did not go +along. + +"Haven't you got somethin' in your medicine-case you could mollify him +with?" said Uncle Beamish. "Somethin' sweet that he might like?" + +For an instant I caught at this absurd suggestion, and my mind ran over +the contents of my little bottles. If I had known his character, some +sodium bromide in his morning feed might, by this time, have mollified +his obstinacy. + +"If I could be free of this blanket," said I, fumbling at the pin +behind me, "I would get out and lead him into the road." + +"You could not do it," said Miss Burroughs. "You might pull his head +off, but he wouldn't move. I have seen him tried." + +At this moment a window-sash in the second story of the house was +raised, and there, not thirty feet from us, stood an elderly female, +wrapped in a gray shawl, with piercing eyes shining through great +spectacles. + +"You seem to be stuck," said she, sarcastically. "You are worse stuck +than the fork was in my kitchen table." + +We made no answer. I do not know how Miss Burroughs looked or felt, or +what was the appearance of Uncle Beamish, but I know I must have been +very red in the face. I gave the horse a powerful crack and shouted to +him to go on. There was no need for low speaking now. + +"You needn't be cruel to dumb animals," said the old lady, "and you +can't budge him. He never did like snow, especially in going away from +home. You cut a powerful queer figure, young man, with that +horse-blanket around you. You don't look much like a practising +physician." + +"Miss Burroughs," I exclaimed, "please take that pin out of this +blanket. If I can get at his head I know I can pull him around and +make him go." + +But she did not seem to hear me. "Aunty," she cried, "it's a shame to +stand there and make fun of us. We have got a perfect right to go away +if we want to, and we ought not to be laughed at." + +The old lady paid no attention to this remark. + +"And there's that false doctor," she said. "I wonder how he feels just +now." + +"False doctor!" exclaimed Miss Burroughs. "I don't understand." + +"Young lady," said Uncle Beamish, "I'm no false doctor. I intended to +tell you all about it as soon as I got a chance, but I haven't had one. +And, old lady, I'd like you to know that I don't say I'm a doctor, but +I do say I'm a nuss, and a good nuss, and you can't deny it." + +To this challenge the figure at the window made no answer. + +"Catherine," said she, "I can't stand here and take cold, but I just +want to know one thing: Have you positively made up your mind to marry +that young doctor in the horse-blanket?" + +This question fell like a bomb-shell into the middle of the stationary +sleigh. + +I had never asked Kitty to marry me. I loved her with all my heart and +soul, and I hoped, almost believed, that she loved me. It had been my +intention, when we should be left together in the sleigh this morning, +after dropping Uncle Beamish at his sister's house, to ask her to marry +me. + +The old woman's question pierced me as if it had been a flash of +lightning coming through the frosty air of a winter morning. I dropped +the useless reins and turned. Kitty's face was ablaze. She made a +movement as if she was about to jump out of the sleigh and flee. + +"Oh, Kitty!" said I, bending down toward her, "tell her yes! I beg I +entreat, I implore you to tell her yes! Oh, Kitty! if you don't say +yes I shall never know another happy day." + +For one moment Kitty looked up into my face, and then said she: + +"It is my positive intention to marry him!" + +With the agility of a youth, Uncle Beamish threw the robe from him and +sprang out into the deep snow. Then, turning toward us, he took off +his hat. + +"By George!" said he, "you're a pair of trumps. I never did see any +human bein's step up to the mark more prompt. Madam," he cried, +addressing the old lady, "you ought to be the proudest woman in this +county at seein' such a thing as this happen under your window of a +Christmas mornin'. And now the best thing that you can do is to invite +us all in to have breakfast." + +"You'll have to come in," said she, "or else stay out there and freeze +to death, for that horse isn't going to take you away. And if my niece +really intends to marry the young man, and has gone so far as to start +to run away with him,--and with a false doctor,--of course I've got no +more to say about it, and you can come in and have breakfast." And +with that she shut down the window. + +"That's talkin'," said Uncle Beamish. "Sit still, doctor, and I'll +lead him around to the back door. I guess he'll move quick enough when +you want him to turn back." + +Without the slightest objection Sir Rohan permitted himself to be +turned back and led up to the kitchen porch. + +"Now you two sparklin' angels get out," said Uncle Beamish, "and go in. +I'll attend to the horse." + +Jane, with a broad grin on her face, opened the kitchen door. + +"Merry Christmas to you both!" said she. + +"Merry Christmas!" we cried, and each of us shook her by the hand. + +"Go in the sitting-room and get warm," said Jane. "She'll be down +pretty soon." + +I do not know how long we were together in that sitting-room. We had +thousands of things to say, and we said most of them. Among other +things, we managed to get in some explanations of the occurrences of +the previous night. Kitty told her tale briefly. She and her aunt, to +whom she was making a visit, and who wanted her to make her house her +home, had had a quarrel two days before. Kitty was wild to go to the +Collingwoods', and the old lady, who, for some reason, hated the +family, was determined she should not go. But Kitty was immovable, and +never gave up until she found that her aunt had gone so far as to +dispose of her horse, thus making it impossible to travel in such +weather, there being no public conveyances passing the house. Kitty +was an orphan, and had a guardian who would have come to her aid, but +she could not write to him in time, and, in utter despair, she went to +bed. She would not eat or drink, she would not speak, and she covered +up her head. + +"After a day and a night," said Kitty, "aunty got dreadfully frightened +and thought something was the matter with my brain. Her family are +awfully anxious about their brains. I knew she had sent for the doctor +and I was glad of it, for I thought he would help me. I must say I was +surprised when I first saw that Mr. Beamish, for I thought he was Dr. +Morris. Now tell me about your coming here." + +"And so," she said, when I had finished, "you had no idea that you were +prescribing for me! Please do tell me what were those medicines you +sent up to me and which I took like a truly good girl." + +"I didn't know it at the time," said I, "but I sent you sixty drops of +the deepest, strongest love in a glass of water, and ten grains of +perfect adoration." + +"Nonsense!" said Kitty, with a blush, and at that moment Uncle Beamish +knocked at the door. + +"I thought I'd just step in and tell you," said he, "that breakfast +will be comin' along in a minute. I found they were goin' to have +buckwheat cakes, anyway, and I prevailed on Jane to put sausages in the +bill of fare. Merry Christmas to you both! I would like to say more, +but here comes the old lady and Jane." + +The breakfast was a strange meal, but a very happy one. The old lady +was very dignified. She made no allusion to Christmas or to what had +happened, but talked to Uncle Beamish about people in Warburton. + +I have a practical mind, and, in spite of the present joy, I could not +help feeling a little anxiety about what was to be done when breakfast +was over. But just as we were about to rise from the table we were all +startled by a great jingle of sleigh-bells outside. The old lady arose +and stopped to the window. + +"There!" said she, turning toward us. "Here's a pretty kettle of fish! +There's a two-horse sleigh outside, with a man driving, and a gentleman +in the back seat who I am sure is Dr. Morris, and he has come all the +way on this bitter cold morning to see the patient I sent for him to +come to. Now, who is going to tell him he has come on a fool's errand?" + +"Fool's errand!" I cried. "Every one of you wait in here and I'll go +out and tell him." + +When I dashed out of doors and stood by the side of my uncle's sleigh, +he was truly an amazed man. + +"I will get in, uncle," said I, "and if you will let John drive the +horses slowly around the yard, I will tell you how I happen to be here." + +The story was a much longer one than I expected it to be, and John must +have driven those horses backward and forward for half an hour. + +"Well," said my uncle, at last, "I never saw your Kitty, but I knew her +father and her mother, and I will go in and take a look at her. If I +like her, I will take you all on to the Collingwoods', and drop Uncle +Beamish at his sister's house." + +"I'll tell you what it is, young doctor," said Uncle Beamish, at +parting, "you ought to buy that big roan horse. He has been a regular +guardian angel to us this Christmas." + +"Oh, that would never do at all," cried Kitty. "His patients would all +die before he got there." + +"That is, if they had anything the matter with them," added my uncle. + + + + +A PIECE OF RED CALICO + +Before beginning the relation of the following incidents, I wish to +state that I am a young married man, doing business in a large city, in +the suburbs of which I live. + +I was going into town the other morning, when my wife handed me a +little piece of red calico, and asked me if I would have time, during +the day, to buy her two yards and a half of calico like it. I assured +her that it would be no trouble at all, and putting the piece of calico +in my pocket, I took the train for the city. + +At lunch-time I stopped in at a large dry-goods store to attend to my +wife's commission. I saw a well-dressed man walking the floor between +the counters, where long lines of girls were waiting on much longer +lines of customers, and asked him where I could see some red calico. + +"This way, sir," and he led me up the store. "Miss Stone," said he to +a young lady, "show this gentleman some red calico." + +"What shade do you want!" asked Miss Stone. + +I showed her the little piece of calico that my wife had given me. She +looked at it and handed it back to me. Then she took down a great roll +of red calico and spread it out on the counter. + +"Why, that isn't the shade!" said I. + +"No, not exactly," said she. "But it is prettier than your sample." + +"That may be," said I. "But, you see, I want to match this piece. +There is something already in my house, made of this kind of calico, +which needs to be made larger, or mended, or something. I want some +calico of the same shade." + +The girl made no answer, but took down another roll. + +"That's the shade," said she. + +"Yes," I replied, "but it's striped." + +"Stripes are more worn than anything else in calicoes," said she. + + "Yes. But this isn't to be worn. It's for furniture, I +think. At any rate, I want perfectly plain stuff, to match something +already in use." + +"Well, I don't think you can find it perfectly plain, unless you get +Turkey red." + +"What is Turkey red?" I asked. + +"Turkey red is perfectly plain in calicoes," she answered. + +"Well, let me see some." + +"We haven't any Turkey red calico left," she said, "but we have some +very nice plain calicoes in other colors." + +"I don't want any other color. I want stuff to match this." + +"It's hard to match cheap calico like that," she said, and so I left +her. + +I next went into a store a few doors farther up Broadway. When I +entered I approached the "floorwalker," and handing him my sample, said: + +"Have you any calico like this?" + +"Yes, sir," said he. "Third counter to the right." I went to the +third counter to the right, and showed my sample to the salesman in +attendance there. He looked at it on both sides. Then he said: + +"We haven't any of this." + +"The floorwalker said you had," said I. + +"We had it, but we're out of it now. You'll get that goods at an +upholsterers." + +I went across the street to an upholsterer's. + +"Have you any stuff like this?" I asked. + +"No," said the salesman, "we haven't. Is it for furniture?" + +"Yes," I replied. + +"Then Turkey red is what you want." + +"Is Turkey red just like this?" I asked. + +"No," said he, "but it's much better." + +"That makes no difference to me," I replied. "I want something just +like this." + +"But they don't use that for furniture," he said. + +"I should think people could use anything they wanted for furniture," I +remarked, somewhat sharply. + +"They can, but they don't," he said quite calmly. "They don't use red +like that. They use Turkey red." + +I said no more, but left. The next place I visited was a very large +dry-goods store. Of the first salesman I saw I inquired if they kept +red calico like my sample. + +"You'll find that on the second story," said he. + +I went up-stairs. There I asked a man: + +"Where shall I find red calico?" + +"In the far room to the left," and he pointed to a distant corner. + +I walked through the crowds of purchasers and salespeople, around the +counters and tables filled with goods, to the far room to the left. +When I got there I asked for red calico. + +"The second counter down this side," said the man. I went there and +produced my sample. "Calicoes down-stairs," said the man. + +"They told me they were up here," I said. + +"Not these plain goods. You'll find them downstairs at the back of the +store, over on that side." + +I went down-stairs to the back of the store. + +"Where can I find red calico like this?" I asked. + +"Next counter but one," said the man addressed, walking with me in the +direction pointed out. "Dunn, show red calicoes." + +Mr. Dunn took my sample and looked at it. "We haven't this shade in +that quality of goods," he said. + +"Well, have you it in any quality of goods?" I asked. + +"Yes. We've got it finer." He took down a piece of calico, and +unrolled a yard or two of it. + +"That's not this shade," I said. + +"No," said he. "The goods is finer and the color's better." + +"I want it to match this," I said. + +"I thought you weren't particular about the match," said the salesman. +"You said you didn't care for the quality of the goods, and you know +you can't match without you take into consideration quality and color +both. If you want that quality of goods in red, you ought to get +Turkey red." + +I did not think it necessary to answer this remark, but said: + +"Then you've got nothing to match this?" + +"No, sir. But perhaps they may have it in the upholstery department, +in the sixth story." + +I got into the elevator and went up to the top of the house. + +"Have you any red stuff like this?" I said to a young man. + +"Red stuff? Upholstery department--other end of this floor." + +I went to the other end of the floor. + +"I want some red calico," I said to a man. + +"Furniture goods?" he asked. + +"Yes," said I. + +"Fourth counter to the left." + +I went to the fourth counter to the left, and showed my sample to a +salesman. He looked at it, and said: "You'll get this down on the +first floor--calico department." + +I turned on my heel, descended in the elevator, and went out on +Broadway. I was thoroughly sick of red calico. But I determined to +make one more trial. My wife had bought her red calico not long +before, and there must be some to be had somewhere. I ought to have +asked her where she bought it, but I thought a simple little thing like +that could be procured anywhere. + +I went into another large dry-goods store. As I entered the door a +sudden tremor seized me. I could not bear to take out that piece of +red calico. If I had had any other kind of a rag about me--a pen-wiper +or anything of the sort--I think I would have asked them if they could +match that. + +But I stepped up to a young woman and presented my sample, with the +usual question. + +"Back room, counter on the left," she said. + +I went there. + +"Have you any red calico like this?" I asked of the lady behind the +counter. + +"No, sir," she said, "but we have it in Turkey red." + +Turkey red again! I surrendered. + +"All right," I said. "Give me Turkey red." + +"How much, sir?" she asked. + +"I don't know--say five yards." + +The lady looked at me rather strangely, but measured off five yards of +Turkey red calico. Then she rapped on the counter and called out, +"Cash!" A little girl, with yellow hair in two long plaits, came +slowly up. The lady wrote the number of yards; the name of the goods; +her own number; the price; the amount of the bank-note I handed her; +and some other matters--probably the color of my eyes and the direction +and velocity of the wind--on a slip of paper. She then copied all this +in a little book which she kept by her. Then she handed the slip of +paper, the money, and the Turkey red to the yellow-haired girl. This +young girl copied the slip in a little book she carried, and then she +went away with the calico, the paper slip, and the money. + +After a very long time--during which the little girl probably took the +goods, the money, and the slip to some central desk, where the note was +received, its amount and number entered in a book; change given to the +girl; a copy of the slip made and entered; girl's entry examined and +approved; goods wrapped up; girl registered; plaits counted and entered +on a slip of paper and copied by the girl in her book; girl taken to a +hydrant and washed; number of towel entered on a paper slip and copied +by the girl in her book; value of my note and amount of change branded +somewhere on the child, and said process noted on a slip of paper and +copied in her book--the girl came to me, bringing my change and the +package of Turkey red calico. + +I had time for but very little work at the office that afternoon, and +when I reached home I handed the package of calico to my wife. She +unrolled it and exclaimed: + +"Why, this doesn't match the piece I gave you!" + +"Match it!" I cried. "Oh no! it doesn't match it. You didn't want +that matched. You were mistaken. What you wanted was Turkey +red--third counter to the left. I mean, Turkey red is what they use!" + +My wife looked at me in amazement, and then I detailed to her my +troubles. + +"Well," said she, "this Turkey red is a great deal prettier than what I +had, and you've bought so much of it that I needn't use the other at +all. I wish I had thought of Turkey red before." + +"I wish from my heart you had!" said I. + + + + +THE CHRISTMAS WRECK + +"Well, sir," said old Silas, as he gave a preliminary puff to the pipe +he had just lighted, and so satisfied himself that the draught was all +right, "the wind's a-comin', an' so's Christmas. But it's no use bein' +in a hurry fur either of 'em, fur sometimes they come afore you want +'em, anyway." + +Silas was sitting in the stern of a small sailing-boat which he owned, +and in which he sometimes took the Sandport visitors out for a sail, +and at other times applied to its more legitimate but less profitable +use, that of fishing. That afternoon he had taken young Mr. Nugent for +a brief excursion on that portion of the Atlantic Ocean which sends its +breakers up on the beach of Sandport. But he had found it difficult, +nay, impossible, just now, to bring him back, for the wind had +gradually died away until there was not a breath of it left. Mr. +Nugent, to whom nautical experiences were as new as the very nautical +suit of blue flannel which he wore, rather liked the calm. It was such +a relief to the monotony of rolling waves. He took out a cigar and +lighted it, and then he remarked: + +"I can easily imagine how a wind might come before you sailors might +want it, but I don't see how Christmas could come too soon." + +"It come wunst on me when things couldn't `a' looked more onready fur +it," said Silas. + +"How was that?" asked Mr. Nugent, settling himself a little more +comfortably on the hard thwart. "If it's a story, let's have it. This +is a good time to spin a yarn." + +"Very well," said old Silas. "I'll spin her." + +The bare-legged boy whose duty it was to stay forward and mind the jib +came aft as soon as he smelt a story, and took a nautical position, +which was duly studied by Mr. Nugent, on a bag of ballast in the bottom +of the boat. + +"It's nigh on to fifteen year ago," said Silas, "that I was on the bark +Mary Auguster, bound for Sydney, New South Wales, with a cargo of +canned goods. We was somewhere about longitood a hundred an' seventy, +latitood nothin', an' it was the twenty-second o' December, when we was +ketched by a reg'lar typhoon which blew straight along, end on, fur a +day an' a half. It blew away the storm-sails. It blew away every +yard, spar, shroud, an' every strand o' riggin', an' snapped the masts +off close to the deck. It blew away all the boats. It blew away the +cook's caboose, an' everythin' else on deck. It blew off the hatches, +an' sent 'em spinnin' in the air about a mile to leeward. An' afore it +got through, it washed away the cap'n an' all the crew 'cept me an' two +others. These was Tom Simmons, the second mate, an' Andy Boyle, a chap +from the Adirondack Mount'ins, who'd never been to sea afore. As he +was a landsman, he ought, by rights, to 'a' been swep' off by the wind +an' water, consid'rin' that the cap'n an' sixteen good seamen had gone +a'ready. But he had hands eleven inches long, an' that give him a grip +which no typhoon could git the better of. Andy had let out that his +father was a miller up there in York State, an' a story had got round +among the crew that his granfather an' great-gran'father was millers, +too; an' the way the fam'ly got such big hands come from their habit of +scoopin' up a extry quart or two of meal or flour fur themselves when +they was levellin' off their customers' measures. He was a +good-natered feller, though, an' never got riled when I'd tell him to +clap his flour-scoops onter a halyard. + +"We was all soaked, an' washed, an' beat, an' battered. We held on +some way or other till the wind blowed itself out, an' then we got on +our legs an' began to look about us to see how things stood. The sea +had washed into the open hatches till the vessel was more'n half full +of water, an' that had sunk her, so deep that she must 'a' looked like +a canal-boat loaded with gravel. We hadn't had a thing to eat or drink +durin' that whole blow, an' we was pretty ravenous. We found a keg of +water which was all right, and a box of biscuit which was what you +might call softtack, fur they was soaked through an' through with +sea-water. We eat a lot of them so, fur we couldn't wait, an' the rest +we spread on the deck to dry, fur the sun was now shinin' hot enough to +bake bread. We couldn't go below much, fur there was a pretty good +swell on the sea, an' things was floatin' about so's to make it +dangerous. But we fished out a piece of canvas, which we rigged up +ag'in' the stump of the mainmast so that we could have somethin' that +we could sit down an' grumble under. What struck us all the hardest +was that the bark was loaded with a whole cargo of jolly things to eat, +which was just as good as ever they was, fur the water couldn't git +through the tin cans in which they was all put up, an' here we was with +nothin' to live on but them salted biscuit. There wasn't no way of +gittin' at any of the ship's stores, or any of the fancy prog, fur +everythin' was stowed away tight under six or seven feet of water, an' +pretty nigh all the room that was left between decks was filled up with +extry spars, lumber, boxes, an' other floatin' stuff. All was +shiftin', an' bumpin', an' bangin' every time the vessel rolled. + +"As I said afore, Tom was second mate, an' I was bo's'n. Says I to +Tom, `The thing we've got to do is to put up some kind of a spar with a +rag on it fur a distress flag, so that we'll lose no time bein' took +off.' `There's no use a-slavin' at anythin' like that,' says Tom, `fur +we've been blowed off the track of traders, an' the more we work the +hungrier we'll git, an' the sooner will them biscuit be gone.' + +"Now when I heared Tom say this I sot still an' began to consider. +Bein' second mate, Tom was, by rights, in command of this craft. But +it was easy enough to see that if he commanded there'd never be nothin' +fur Andy an' me to do. All the grit he had in him he'd used up in +holdin' on durin' that typhoon. What he wanted to do now was to make +himself comfortable till the time come for him to go to Davy Jones's +locker--an' thinkin', most likely, that Davy couldn't make it any +hotter fur him than it was on that deck, still in latitood nothin' at +all, fur we'd been blowed along the line pretty nigh due west. So I +calls to Andy, who was busy turnin' over the biscuits on the deck. +`Andy,' says I, when he had got under the canvas, `we's goin' to have a +'lection fur skipper. Tom, here, is about played out. He's one +candydate, an' I'm another. Now, who do you vote fur? An' mind yer +eye, youngster, that you don't make no mistake.' `I vote fur you' says +Andy. `Carried unanermous!' says I. `An' I want you to take notice +that I'm cap'n of what's left of the Mary Auguster, an' you two has got +to keep your minds on that, an' obey orders.' If Davy Jones was to do +all that Tom Simmons said when he heared this, the old chap would be +kept busier than he ever was yit. But I let him growl his growl out, +knowin' he'd come round all right, fur there wasn't no help fur it, +consid'rin' Andy an' me was two to his one. Pretty soon we all went to +work, an' got up a spar from below, which we rigged to the stump of the +foremast, with Andy's shirt atop of it. + +"Them sea-soaked, sun-dried biscuit was pretty mean prog, as you might +think, but we eat so many of 'em that afternoon, an' 'cordingly drank +so much water, that I was obliged to put us all on short rations the +next day. `This is the day afore Christmas,' says Andy Boyle, `an' +to-night will be Christmas eve, an' it's pretty tough fur us to be +sittin' here with not even so much hardtack as we want, an' all the +time thinkin' that the hold of this ship is packed full of the gayest +kind of good things to eat.' `Shut up about Christmas!' says Tom +Simmons. `Them two youngsters of mine, up in Bangor, is havin' their +toes and noses pretty nigh froze, I 'spect, but they'll hang up their +stockin's all the same to-night, never thinkin' that their dad's bein' +cooked alive on a empty stomach.' `Of course they wouldn't hang 'em +up,' says I, if they knowed what a fix you was in, but they don't know +it, an' what's the use of grumblin' at 'em fur bein' a little jolly?' +`Well,' says Andy `they couldn't be more jollier than I'd be if I could +git at some of them fancy fixin's down in the hold. I worked well on +to a week at 'Frisco puttin' in them boxes, an' the names of the things +was on the outside of most of 'em; an' I tell you what it is, mates, it +made my mouth water, even then, to read 'em, an' I wasn't hungry, +nuther, havin' plenty to eat three times a day. There was roast beef, +an' roast mutton, an' duck, an' chicken, an' soup, an' peas, an' beans, +an' termaters, an' plum-puddin', an' mince-pie--' `Shut up with your +mince-pie!' sung out Tom Simmons. `Isn't it enough to have to gnaw on +these salt chips, without hearin' about mince-pie?' `An' more'n that' +says Andy, `there was canned peaches, an' pears, an' plums, an' +cherries.' + +"Now these things did sound so cool an' good to me on that br'ilin' +deck that I couldn't stand it, an' I leans over to Andy, an' I says: +`Now look-a here; if you don't shut up talkin' about them things what's +stowed below, an' what we can't git at nohow, overboard you go!' `That +would make you short-handed,' says Andy, with a grin. `Which is more'n +you could say,' says I, `if you'd chuck Tom an' me over'--alludin' to +his eleven-inch grip. Andy didn't say no more then, but after a while +he comes to me, as I was lookin' round to see if anything was in sight, +an' says he, `I spose you ain't got nothin' to say ag'in' my divin' +into the hold just aft of the foremast, where there seems to be a bit +of pretty clear water, an' see if I can't git up somethin'?' `You kin +do it, if you like,' says I, `but it's at your own risk. You can't +take out no insurance at this office.' `All right, then,' says Andy; +`an' if I git stove in by floatin' boxes, you an' Tom'll have to eat +the rest of them salt crackers.' `Now, boy,' says I,--an' he wasn't +much more, bein' only nineteen year old,--`you'd better keep out o' +that hold. You'll just git yourself smashed. An' as to movin' any of +them there heavy boxes, which must be swelled up as tight as if they +was part of the ship, you might as well try to pull out one of the Mary +Auguster's ribs.' `I'll try it,' says Andy, `fur to-morrer is +Christmas, an' if I kin help it I ain't goin' to be floatin' atop of a +Christmas dinner without eatin' any on it.' I let him go, fur he was a +good swimmer an' diver, an' I did hope he might root out somethin' or +other, fur Christmas is about the worst day in the year fur men to be +starvin' on, an' that's what we was a-comin' to. + +"Well, fur about two hours Andy swum, an' dove, an' come up blubberin', +an' dodged all sorts of floatin' an' pitchin' stuff, fur the swell was +still on. But he couldn't even be so much as sartin that he'd found +the canned vittles. To dive down through hatchways, an' among broken +bulkheads, to hunt fur any partiklar kind o' boxes under seven foot of +sea-water, ain't no easy job. An' though Andy said he got hold of the +end of a box that felt to him like the big uns he'd noticed as havin' +the meat-pies in, he couldn't move it no more'n if it had been the +stump of the foremast. If we could have pumped the water out of the +hold we could have got at any part of the cargo we wanted, but as it +was, we couldn't even reach the ship's stores, which, of course, must +have been mostly sp'iled anyway, whereas the canned vittles was just as +good as new. The pumps was all smashed or stopped up, for we tried +'em, but if they hadn't 'a' been we three couldn't never have pumped +out that ship on three biscuit a day, an' only about two days' rations +at that. + +"So Andy he come up, so fagged out that it was as much as he could do +to get his clothes on, though they wasn't much, an' then he stretched +himself out under the canvas an' went to sleep, an' it wasn't long +afore he was talkin' about roast turkey an' cranberry sass, an' +punkin-pie, an' sech stuff, most of which we knowed was under our feet +that present minnit. Tom Simmons he just b'iled over, an' sung out: +`Roll him out in the sun an' let him cook! I can't stand no more of +this!' But I wasn't goin' to have Andy treated no sech way as that, +fur if it hadn't been fur Tom Simmons' wife an' young uns, Andy'd been +worth two of him to anybody who was consid'rin' savin' life. But I +give the boy a good punch in the ribs to stop his dreamin', fur I was +as hungry as Tom was, an' couldn't stand no nonsense about Christmas +dinners. + +"It was a little arter noon when Andy woke up, an' he went outside to +stretch himself. In about a minute he give a yell that made Tom an' me +jump. `A sail!' he hollered. `A sail!' An' you may bet your life, +young man, that 'twasn't more'n half a second afore us two had scuffled +out from under that canvas, an' was standin' by Andy. `There she is!' +he shouted, `not a mile to win'ard.' I give one look, an' then I sings +out: `'Tain't a sail! It's a flag of distress! Can't you see, you +land-lubber, that that's the Stars and Stripes upside down?' `Why, so +it is,' says Andy, with a couple of reefs in the joyfulness of his +voice. An' Tom he began to growl as if somebody had cheated him out of +half a year's wages. + +"The flag that we saw was on the hull of a steamer that had been +driftin' down on us while we was sittin' under our canvas. It was +plain to see she'd been caught in the typhoon, too, fur there wasn't a +mast or a smoke-stack on her. But her hull was high enough out of the +water to catch what wind there was, while we was so low sunk that we +didn't make no way at all. There was people aboard, and they saw us, +an' waved their hats an' arms, an' Andy an' me waved ours; but all we +could do was to wait till they drifted nearer, fur we hadn't no boats +to go to 'em if we'd wanted to. + +"`I'd like to know what good that old hulk is to us,' says Tom Simmons. +`She can't take us off.' It did look to me somethin' like the blind +leadin' the blind. But Andy he sings out: `We'd be better off aboard +of her, fur she ain't water-logged, an', more'n that, I don't s'pose +her stores are all soaked up in salt water.' There was some sense in +that, an' when the steamer had got to within half a mile of us, we was +glad to see a boat put out from her with three men in it. It was a +queer boat, very low an' flat, an' not like any ship's boat I ever see. +But the two fellers at the oars pulled stiddy, an' pretty soon the boat +was 'longside of us, an' the three men on our deck. One of 'em was the +first mate of the other wreck, an' when he found out what was the +matter with us, he spun his yarn, which was a longer one than ours. +His vessel was the Water Crescent, nine hundred tons, from 'Frisco to +Melbourne, an' they had sailed about six weeks afore we did. They was +about two weeks out when some of their machinery broke down, an' when +they got it patched up it broke ag'in, worse than afore, so that they +couldn't do nothin' with it. They kep' along under sail for about a +month, makin' mighty poor headway till the typhoon struck 'em, an' that +cleaned their decks off about as slick as it did ours, but their +hatches wasn't blowed off, an' they didn't ship no water wuth +mentionin', an' the crew havin' kep' below, none of 'em was lost. But +now they was clean out of provisions an' water, havin' been short when +the breakdown happened, fur they had sold all the stores they could +spare to a French brig in distress that they overhauled when about a +week out. When they sighted us they felt pretty sure they'd git some +provisions out of us. But when I told the mate what a fix we was in +his jaw dropped till his face was as long as one of Andy's hands. +Howsomdever, he said he'd send the boat back fur as many men as it +could bring over, an' see if they couldn't git up some of our stores. +Even if they was soaked with salt water, they'd be better than nothin'. +Part of the cargo of the Water Crescent was tools an' things fur some +railway contractors out in Australier, an' the mate told the men to +bring over some of them irons that might be used to fish out the +stores. All their ship's boats had been blowed away, an' the one they +had was a kind of shore boat for fresh water, that had been shipped as +part of the cargo, an' stowed below. It couldn't stand no kind of a +sea, but there wasn't nothin' but a swell on, an' when it come back it +had the cap'n in it, an' five men, besides a lot of chains an' tools. + +"Them fellers an' us worked pretty nigh the rest of the day, an' we got +out a couple of bar'ls of water, which was all right, havin' been tight +bunged, an' a lot of sea-biscuit, all soaked an sloppy, but we only got +a half-bar'l of meat, though three or four of the men stripped an' dove +fur more'n an hour. We cut up some of the meat an' eat it raw, an' the +cap'n sent some over to the other wreck, which had drifted past us to +leeward, an' would have gone clean away from us if the cap'n hadn't had +a line got out an' made us fast to it while we was a-workin' at the +stores. + +"That night the cap'n took us three, as well as the provisions we'd got +out, on board his hull, where the 'commodations was consid'able better +than they was on the half-sunk Mary Auguster. An' afore we turned in +he took me aft an' had a talk with me as commandin' off'cer of my +vessel. `That wreck o' yourn,' says he, `has got a vallyble cargo in +it, which isn't sp'iled by bein' under water. Now, if you could get +that cargo into port it would put a lot of money in your pocket, fur +the owners couldn't git out of payin' you fur takin' charge of it an' +havin' it brung in. Now I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll lie by you, +an' I've got carpenters aboard that'll put your pumps in order, an' +I'll set my men to work to pump out your vessel. An' then, when she's +afloat all right, I'll go to work ag'in at my vessel--which I didn't +s'pose there was any use o' doin', but whilst I was huntin' round +amongst our cargo to-day I found that some of the machinery we carried +might be worked up so's to take the place of what is broke in our +engine. We've got a forge aboard, an' I believe we can make these +pieces of machinery fit, an' git goin' ag'in. Then I'll tow you into +Sydney, an' we'll divide the salvage money. I won't git nothin' fur +savin' my vessel, coz that's my business, but you wasn't cap'n o' +yourn, an' took charge of her a-purpose to save her, which is another +thing.' + +"I wasn't at all sure that I didn't take charge of the Mary Auguster to +save myself an' not the vessel, but I didn't mention that, an' asked +the cap'n how he expected to live all this time. + +"`Oh, we kin git at your stores easy enough,' says he, when the water's +pumped out.' `They'll be mostly sp'iled,' says I. `That don't matter' +says he. `Men'll eat anything when they can't git nothin' else.' An' +with that he left me to think it over. + +"I must say, young man, an' you kin b'lieve me if you know anything +about sech things, that the idee of a pile of money was mighty temptin' +to a feller like me, who had a girl at home ready to marry him, and who +would like nothin' better'n to have a little house of his own, an' a +little vessel of his own, an' give up the other side of the world +altogether. But while I was goin' over all this in my mind, an' +wonderin' if the cap'n ever could git us into port, along comes Andy +Boyle, an' sits down beside me. `It drives me pretty nigh crazy,' says +he, `to think that to-morrer's Christmas, an' we've got to feed on that +sloppy stuff we fished out of our stores, an' not much of it, nuther, +while there's all that roast turkey an' plum-puddin' an' mince-pie +a-floatin' out there just afore our eyes, an' we can't have none of +it.' `You hadn't oughter think so much about eatin', Andy,' says +I,`but if I was talkin' about them things I wouldn't leave out canned +peaches. By George! On a hot Christmas like this is goin' to be, I'd +be the jolliest Jack on the ocean if I could git at that canned fruit.' +`Well, there's a way,' says Andy, `that we might git some of 'em. A +part of the cargo of this ship is stuff far blastin' rocks--ca'tridges, +'lectric bat'ries, an' that sort of thing; an' there's a man aboard +who's goin' out to take charge of 'em. I've been talkin' to this +bat'ry man, an' I've made up my mind it'll be easy enough to lower a +little ca'tridge down among our cargo an' blow out a part of it.' `What +'u'd be the good of it,' says I, `blowed into chips?' `It might smash +some,' says he, `but others would be only loosened, an' they'd float up +to the top, where we could git 'em, specially them as was packed with +pies, which must be pretty light.' `Git out, Andy,' says I, `with all +that stuff!' An' he got out. + +"But the idees he'd put into my head didn't git out, an' as I laid on +my back on the deck, lookin' up at the stars, they sometimes seemed to +put themselves into the shape of a little house, with a little woman +cookin' at the kitchin fire, an' a little schooner layin' at anchor +just off shore. An' then ag'in they'd hump themselves up till they +looked like a lot of new tin cans with their tops off, an' all kinds of +good things to eat inside, specially canned peaches--the big white +kind, soft an' cool, each one split in half, with a holler in the +middle filled with juice. By George, sir! the very thought of a tin +can like that made me beat my heels ag'in the deck. I'd been mighty +hungry, an' had eat a lot of salt pork, wet an' raw, an' now the very +idee of it, even cooked, turned my stomach. I looked up to the stars +ag'in, an' the little house an' the little schooner was clean gone, an' +the whole sky was filled with nothin' but bright new tin cans. + +"In the mornin' Andy he come to me ag'in. `Have you made up your +mind,' says he, `about gittin' some of them good things fur Christmas +dinner?' `Confound you!' says I, `you talk as if all we had to do was +to go an' git 'em.' `An' that's what I b'lieve we kin do,' says he, +`with the help of that bat'ry man.' `Yes,' says I, `an' blow a lot of +the cargo into flinders, an' damage the Mary Auguster so's she couldn't +never be took into port.' An' then I told him what the cap'n had said +to me, an' what I was goin' to do with the money. `A little +ca'tridge,' says Andy, `would do all we want, an' wouldn't hurt the +vessel, nuther. Besides that, I don't b'lieve what this cap'n says +about tinkerin' up his engine. 'Tain't likely he'll ever git her +runnin' ag'in, nor pump out the Mary Auguster, nuther. If I was you +I'd a durned sight ruther have a Christmas dinner in hand than a house +an' wife in the bush.' `I ain't thinkin' o' marryin' a girl in +Australier,' says I. An' Andy he grinned, an' said I wouldn't marry +nobody if I had to live on sp'iled vittles till I got her. + +"A little arter that I went to the cap'n an' I told him about Andy's +idee, but he was down on it. `It's your vessel, an' not mine,' says +he, `an' if you want to try to git a dinner out of her I'll not stand +in your way. But it's my 'pinion you'll just damage the ship, an' do +nothin'.' Howsomdever, I talked to the bat'ry man about it, an' he +thought it could be done, an' not hurt the ship, nuther. The men was +all in favor of it, fur none of 'em had forgot it was Christmas day. +But Tom Simmons he was ag'in' it strong, fur he was thinkin' he'd git +some of the money if we got the Mary Auguster into port. He was a +selfish-minded man, was Tom, but it was his nater, an' I s'pose he +couldn't help it. + +"Well, it wasn't long afore I began to feel pretty empty an' mean, an' +if I'd wanted any of the prog we got out the day afore, I couldn't have +found much, fur the men had eat it up nearly all in the night. An' so +I just made up my mind without any more foolin', an' me an' Andy Boyle +an' the bat'ry man, with some ca'tridges an' a coil of wire, got into +the little shore boat, an' pulled over to the Mary Auguster. There we +lowered a small ca'tridge down the main hatchway, an' let it rest down +among the cargo. Then we rowed back to the steamer, uncoilin' the wire +as we went. The bat'ry man clumb up on deck, an' fixed his wire to a +'lectric machine, which he'd got all ready afore we started. Andy an' +me didn't git out of the boat. We had too much sense fur that, with +all them hungry fellers waitin' to jump in her. But we just pushed a +little off, an' sot waitin', with our mouths awaterin', fur him to +touch her off. He seemed to be a long time about it, but at last he +did it, an' that instant there was a bang on board the Mary Auguster +that made my heart jump. Andy an' me pulled fur her like mad, the +others a-hollerin' arter us, an' we was on deck in no time. The deck +was all covered with the water that had been throwed up. But I tell +you, sir, that we poked an' fished about, an' Andy stripped an' went +down an' swum all round, an' we couldn't find one floatin' box of +canned goods. There was a lot of splinters, but where they come from +we didn't know. By this time my dander was up, an' I just pitched +around savage. That little ca'tridge wasn't no good, an' I didn't +intend to stand any more foolin'. We just rowed back to the other +wreck, an' I called to the ba'try man to come down, an' bring some +bigger ca'tridges with him, fur if we was goin' to do anything we might +as well do it right. So he got down with a package of bigger ones, an' +jumped into the boat. The cap'n he called out to us to be keerful, an' +Tom Simmons leaned over the rail an' swored; but I didn't pay no +'tention to nuther of 'em, an' we pulled away. + +"When I got aboard the Mary Auguster, I says to the bat'ry man: `We +don't want no nonsense this time, an' I want you to put in enough +ca'tridges to heave up somethin' that'll do fur a Christmas dinner. I +don't know how the cargo is stored, but you kin put one big ca'tridge +'midship, another for'ard, an' another aft, an' one or nuther of 'em +oughter fetch up somethin'.' Well, we got the three ca'tridges into +place. They was a good deal bigger than the one we fust used, an' we +j'ined 'em all to one wire, an' then we rowed back, carryin' the long +wire with us. When we reached the steamer, me an' Andy was a-goin' to +stay in the boat as we did afore, but the cap'n sung out that he +wouldn't allow the bat'ry to be touched off till we come aboard. +`Ther's got to be fair play,' says he. `It's your vittles, but it's my +side that's doin' the work. After we've blasted her this time you two +can go in the boat an' see what there is to git hold of, but two of my +men must go along.' So me an' Andy had to go on deck, an' two big +fellers was detailed to go with us in the little boat when the time +come, an' then the bat'ry man he teched her off. + +"Well, sir, the pop that followed that tech was somethin' to remember. +It shuck the water, it shuck the air, an' it shuck the hull we was on. +A reg'lar cloud of smoke an' flyin' bits of things rose up out of the +Mary Auguster; an' when that smoke cleared away, an' the water was all +b'ilin' with the splash of various-sized hunks that come rainin' down +from the sky, what was left of the Mary Auguster was sprinkled over the +sea like a wooden carpet fur water-birds to walk on. + +"Some of the men sung out one thing, an' some another, an' I could hear +Tom Simmons swear; but Andy an' me said never a word, but scuttled down +into the boat, follered close by the two men who was to go with us. +Then we rowed like devils fur the lot of stuff that was bobbin' about +on the water, out where the Mary Auguster had been. In we went among +the floatin' spars and ship's timbers, I keepin' the things off with an +oar, the two men rowin', an' Andy in the bow. + +"Suddenly Andy give a yell, an' then he reached himself for'ard with +sech a bounce that I thought he'd go overboard. But up he come in a +minnit, his two 'leven-inch hands gripped round a box. He sot down in +the bottom of the boat with the box on his lap an' his eyes screwed on +some letters that was stamped on one end. `Pidjin-pies!' he sings out. +`'Tain't turkeys, nor 'tain't cranberries but, by the Lord Harry, it's +Christmas pies all the same!' After that Andy didn't do no more work, +but sot holdin' that box as if it had been his fust baby. But we kep' +pushin' on to see what else there was. It's my 'pinion that the +biggest part of that bark's cargo was blowed into mince-meat, an' the +most of the rest of it was so heavy that it sunk. But it wasn't all +busted up, an' it didn't all sink. There was a big piece of wreck with +a lot of boxes stove into the timbers, and some of these had in 'em +beef ready b'iled an' packed into cans, an' there was other kinds of +meat, an' dif'rent sorts of vegetables, an' one box of turtle soup. I +looked at every one of 'em as we took 'em in, an' when we got the +little boat pretty well loaded I wanted to still keep on searchin'; but +the men they said that shore boat 'u'd sink if we took in any more +cargo, an' so we put back, I feelin' glummer'n I oughter felt, fur I +had begun to be afeared that canned fruit, sech as peaches, was heavy, +an' li'ble to sink. + +"As soon as we had got our boxes aboard, four fresh men put out in the +boat, an' after a while they come back with another load. An' I was +mighty keerful to read the names on all the boxes. Some was meat-pies, +an' some was salmon, an' some was potted herrin's, an' some was +lobsters. But nary a thing could I see that ever had growed on a tree. + +"Well, sir, there was three loads brought in altogether, an' the +Christmas dinner we had on the for'ard deck of that steamer's hull was +about the jolliest one that was ever seen of a hot day aboard of a +wreck in the Pacific Ocean. The cap'n kept good order, an' when all +was ready the tops was jerked off the boxes, and each man grabbed a can +an' opened it with his knife. When he had cleaned it out, he tuk +another without doin' much questionin' as to the bill of fare. Whether +anybody got pidjin-pie 'cept Andy, I can't say, but the way we piled in +Delmoniker prog would 'a' made people open their eyes as was eatin' +their Christmas dinners on shore that day. Some of the things would +'a' been better cooked a little more, or het up, but we was too fearful +hungry to wait fur that, an' they was tiptop as they was. + +"The cap'n went out afterwards, an' towed in a couple of bar'ls of +flour that was only part soaked through, an' he got some other plain +prog that would do fur future use. But none of us give our minds to +stuff like this arter the glorious Christmas dinner that we'd quarried +out of the Mary Auguster. Every man that wasn't on duty went below and +turned in fur a snooze--all 'cept me, an' I didn't feel just altogether +satisfied. To be sure, I'd had an A1 dinner, an', though a little +mixed, I'd never eat a jollier one on any Christmas that I kin look +back at. But, fur all that, there was a hanker inside o' me. I hadn't +got all I'd laid out to git when we teched off the Mary Auguster. The +day was blazin' hot, an' a lot of the things I'd eat was pretty +peppery. `Now,' thinks I, `if there had been just one can o' peaches +sech as I seen shinin' in the stars last night!' An' just then, as I +was walkin' aft, all by myself, I seed lodged on the stump of the +mizzenmast a box with one corner druv down among the splinters. It was +half split open, an' I could see the tin cans shinin' through the +crack. I give one jump at it, an' wrenched the side off. On the top +of the first can I seed was a picture of a big white peach with green +leaves. That box had been blowed up so high that if it had come down +anywhere 'cept among them splinters it would 'a' smashed itself to +flinders, or killed somebody. So fur as I know, it was the only thing +that fell nigh us, an' by George, sir, I got it! When I had finished a +can of 'em I hunted up Andy, an' then we went aft an' eat some more. +`Well,' says Andy, as we was a-eatin', `how d'ye feel now about blowin' +up your wife, an' your house, an' that little schooner you was goin' to +own?' + +"`Andy,' says I, `this is the joyfulest Christmas I've had yit, an' if +I was to live till twenty hundred I don't b'lieve I'd have no joyfuler, +with things comin' in so pat; so don't you throw no shadders.' + +"`Shadders!' says Andy. `That ain't me. I leave that sort of thing +fur Tom Simmons.' + +"`Shadders is cool,' says I, `an' I kin go to sleep under all he +throws.' + +"Well, sir," continued old Silas, putting his hand on the tiller and +turning his face seaward, "if Tom Simmons had kept command of that +wreck, we all would 'a' laid there an' waited an' waited till some of +us was starved, an' the others got nothin' fur it, fur the cap'n never +mended his engine, an' it wasn't more'n a week afore we was took off, +an' then it was by a sailin' vessel, which left the hull of the Water +Crescent behind her, just as she would 'a' had to leave the Mary +Auguster if that jolly old Christmas wreck had been there. + +"An' now, sir," said Silas, "d'ye see that stretch o' little ripples +over yander, lookin' as if it was a lot o' herrin' turnin' over to dry +their sides? Do you know what that is? That's the supper wind. That +means coffee, an' hot cakes, an' a bit of br'iled fish, an' pertaters, +an' p'r'aps, if the old woman feels in a partiklar good humor, some +canned peaches--big white uns, cut in half, with a holler place in the +middle filled with cool, sweet juice." + + + + +MY WELL AND WHAT CAME OUT OF IT + +Early in my married life I bought a small country estate which my wife +and I looked upon as a paradise. After enjoying its delight for a +little more than a year our souls were saddened by the discovery that +our Eden contained a serpent. This was an insufficient water-supply. + +It had been a rainy season when we first went there, and for a long +time our cisterns gave us full aqueous satisfaction, but early this +year a drought had set in, and we were obliged to be exceedingly +careful of our water. + +It was quite natural that the scarcity of water for domestic purposes +should affect my wife much more than it did me, and perceiving the +discontent which was growing in her mind, I determined to dig a well. +The very next day I began to look for a well-digger. Such an +individual was not easy to find, for in the region in which I lived +wells had become unfashionable; but I determined to persevere in my +search, and in about a week I found a well-digger. + +He was a man of somewhat rough exterior, but of an ingratiating turn of +mind. It was easy to see that it was his earnest desire to serve me. + +"And now, then," said he, when we had had a little conversation about +terms, "the first thing to do is to find out where there is water. +Have you a peach-tree on the place?" We walked to such a tree, and he +cut therefrom a forked twig. + +"I thought," said I, "that divining-rods were always of hazel wood." + +"A peach twig will do quite as well," said he, and I have since found +that he was right. Divining-rods of peach will turn and find water +quite as well as those of hazel or any other kind of wood. + +He took an end of the twig in each hand, and, with the point projecting +in front of him, he slowly walked along over the grass in my little +orchard. Presently the point of the twig seemed to bend itself +downward toward the ground. + +"There," said he, stopping, "you will find water here." + +"I do not want a well here," said I. "This is at the bottom of a hill, +and my barn-yard is at the top. Besides, it is too far from the house." + +"Very good," said he. "We will try somewhere else." + +His rod turned at several other places, but I had objections to all of +them. A sanitary engineer had once visited me, and he had given me a +great deal of advice about drainage, and I knew what to avoid. + +We crossed the ridge of the hill into the low ground on the other side. +Here were no buildings, nothing which would interfere with the purity +of a well. My well-digger walked slowly over the ground with his +divining-rod. Very soon he exclaimed: "Here is water!" And picking +up a stick, he sharpened one end of it and drove it into the ground. +Then he took a string from his pocket, and making a loop in one end, he +put it over the stick. + +"What are you going to do?" I asked. + +"I am going to make a circle four feet in diameter," he said. "We have +to dig the well as wide as that, you know." + +"But I do not want a well here," said I. "It's too close to the wall. +I could not build a house over it. It would not do at all." + +He stood up and looked at me. "Well, sir," said he, "will you tell me +where you would like to have a well?" + +"Yes," said I. "I would like to have it over there in the corner of the +hedge. It would be near enough to the house; it would have a warm +exposure, which will be desirable in winter; and the little house which +I intend to build over it would look better there than anywhere else." + +He took his divining-rod and went to the spot I had indicated. "Is +this the place?" he asked wishing to be sure he had understood me. + +"Yes," I replied. + +He put his twig in position, and in a few seconds it turned in the +direction of the ground. Then he drove down a stick, marked out a +circle, and the next day he came with two men and a derrick, and began +to dig my well. + +When they had gone down twenty-five feet they found water, and when +they had progressed a few feet deeper they began to be afraid of +drowning. I thought they ought to go deeper, but the well-digger said +that they could not dig without first taking out the water, and that +the water came in as fast as they bailed it out, and he asked me to put +it to myself and tell him how they could dig it deeper. I put the +question to myself, but could find no answer. I also laid the matter +before some specialists, and it was generally agreed that if water came +in as fast as it was taken out, nothing more could be desired. The +well was, therefore, pronounced deep enough. It was lined with great +tiles, nearly a yard in diameter, and my well-digger, after +congratulating me on finding water so easily, bade me good-by and +departed with his men and his derrick. + +On the other side of the wall which bounded my grounds, and near which +my well had been dug, there ran a country lane, leading nowhere in +particular, which seemed to be there for the purpose of allowing people +to pass my house, who might otherwise be obliged to stop. + +Along this lane my neighbors would pass, and often strangers drove by, +and as my well could easily be seen over the low stone wall, its +construction had excited a great deal of interest. Some of the people +who drove by were summer folks from the city, and I am sure, from +remarks I overheard, that it was thought a very queer thing to dig for +water. Of course they must have known that people used to do this in +the olden times, even as far back as the time of Jacob and Rebecca, but +the expressions of some of their faces indicated that they remembered +that this was the nineteenth century. + +My neighbors, however, were all rural people, and much more intelligent +in regard to water-supplies. One of them, Phineas Colwell by name, +took a more lively interest in my operations than did any one else. He +was a man of about fifty years of age, who had been a soldier. This +fact was kept alive in the minds of his associates by his dress, a part +of which was always military. If he did not wear an old fatigue-jacket +with brass buttons, he wore his blue trousers, or, perhaps, a waistcoat +that belonged to his uniform, and if he wore none of these, his +military hat would appear upon his head. I think he must also have +been a sailor, judging from the little gold rings in his ears. But +when I first knew him he was a carpenter, who did mason-work whenever +any of the neighbors had any jobs of the sort. He also worked in +gardens by the day, and had told me that he understood the care of +horses and was a very good driver. He sometimes worked on farms, +especially at harvest-time, and I know he could paint, for he once +showed me a fence which he said he had painted. I frequently saw him, +because he always seemed to be either going to his work or coming from +it. In fact, he appeared to consider actual labor in the light of a +bad habit which he wished to conceal, and which he was continually +endeavoring to reform. + +Phineas walked along our lane at least once a day, and whenever he saw +me he told me something about the well. He did not approve of the +place I had selected for it. If he had been digging a well he would +have put it in a very different place. When I had talked with him for +some time and explained why I had chosen this spot, he would say that +perhaps I was right, and begin to talk of something else. But the next +time I saw him he would again assert that if he had been digging that +well he would not have put it there. + +About a quarter of a mile from my house, at a turn of the lane, lived +Mrs. Betty Perch. She was a widow with about twelve children. A few +of these were her own, and the others she had inherited from two +sisters who had married and died, and whose husbands, having proved +their disloyalty by marrying again, were not allowed by the indignant +Mrs. Perch to resume possession of their offspring. The casual +observer might have supposed the number of these children to be very +great,--fifteen or perhaps even twenty,--for if he happened to see a +group of them on the door-step, he would see a lot more if he looked +into the little garden; and under some cedar-trees at the back of the +house there were always some of them on fine days. But perhaps they +sought to increase their apparent number, and ran from one place to +another to be ready to meet observation, like the famous clown +Grimaldi, who used to go through his performances at one London +theatre, and then dash off in his paint and motley to another, so that +perambulating theatre-going men might imagine that there were two +greatest clowns in the world. + +When Mrs. Perch had time she sewed for the neighbors, and, whether she +had time or not, she was always ready to supply them with news. From +the moment she heard I was going to dig a well she took a vital +interest in it. Her own water-supply was unsatisfactory, as she +depended upon a little spring which sometimes dried up in summer, and +should my well turn out to be a good one, she knew I would not object +to her sending the children for pails of water on occasions. + +"It will be fun for them," she said, "and if your water really is good +it will often come in very well for me. Mr. Colwell tells me," she +continued, "that you put your well in the wrong place. He is a +practical man and knows all about wells, and I do hope that for your +sake he may be wrong." + +My neighbors were generally pessimists. Country people are +proverbially prudent, and pessimism is prudence. We feel safe when we +doubt the success of another, because if he should succeed we can say +we were glad we were mistaken, and so step from a position of good +judgment to one of generous disposition without feeling that we have +changed our plane of merit. But the optimist often gets himself into +terrible scrapes, for if he is wrong he cannot say he is glad of it. + +But, whatever else he may be, a pessimist is depressing, and it was, +therefore, a great pleasure to me to have a friend who was an +out-and-out optimist. In fact, he might be called a working optimist. +He lived about six miles from my house, and had a hobby, which was +natural phenomena. He was always on the lookout for that sort of +thing, and when he found it he would study its nature and effect. He +was a man in the maturity of youth, and if the estate on which he lived +had not belonged to his mother, he would have spent much time and money +in investigating its natural phenomena. He often drove over to see me, +and always told me how glad he would be if he had an opportunity of +digging a well. + +"I have the wildest desire," he said, "to know what is in the earth +under our place, and if it should so happen in the course of time that +the limits of earthly existence should be reached by--I mean if the +estate should come into my hands--I would go down, down, down, until I +had found out all that could be discovered. To own a plug of earth +four thousand miles long and only to know what is on the surface of the +upper end of it is unmanly. We might as well be grazing beasts." + +He was sorry that I was digging only for water, because water is a very +commonplace thing, but he was quite sure I would get it, and when my +well was finished he was one of the first to congratulate me. + +"But if I had been in your place," said he, "with full right to do as I +pleased, I would not have let those men go away. I would have set them +to work in some place where there would be no danger of getting +water,--at least, for a long time,--and then you would have found out +what are the deeper treasures of your land." + +Having finished my well, I now set about getting the water into my +residence near by. I built a house over the well and put in it a +little engine, and by means of a system of pipes, like the arteries and +veins of the human body, I proposed to distribute the water to the +various desirable points in my house. + +The engine was the heart, which should start the circulation, which +should keep it going, and which should send throbbing through every +pipe the water which, if it were not our life, was very necessary to it. + +When all was ready we started the engine, and in a very short time we +discovered that something was wrong. For fifteen or twenty minutes +water flowed into the tank at the top of the house, with a sound that +was grander in the ears of my wife and myself than the roar of Niagara, +and then it stopped. Investigation proved that the flow had stopped +because there was no more water in the well. + +It is needless to detail the examinations, investigations, and the +multitude of counsels and opinions with which our minds were filled for +the next few days. It was plain to see that although this well was +fully able to meet the demands of a hand-pump or of bailing buckets, +the water did not flow into it as fast as it could be pumped out by an +engine. Therefore, for the purposes of supplying the circulation of my +domestic water system, the well was declared a failure. + +My non-success was much talked about in the neighborhood, and we +received a great deal of sympathy and condolence. Phineas Colwell was +not surprised at the outcome of the affair. He had said that the well +had been put in the wrong place. Mrs. Betty was not only surprised, +but disgusted. + +"It is all very well for you," she said, "who could afford to buy water +if it was necessary, but it is very different with the widow and the +orphan. If I had not supposed you were going to have a real well, I +would have had my spring cleaned out and deepened. I could have had it +done in the early summer, but it is of no use now. The spring has +dried up." + +She told a neighbor that she believed the digging of my well had dried +up her spring, and that that was the way of this world, where the widow +and the orphan were sure to come out at the little end. + +Of course I did not submit to defeat--at least, not without a struggle. +I had a well, and if anything could be done to make that well supply me +with water, I was going to do it. I consulted specialists, and, after +careful consideration of the matter, they agreed that it would be +unadvisable for me to attempt to deepen my present well, as there was +reason to suppose there was very little water in the place where I had +dug it, and that the very best thing I could do would be to try a +driven well. As I had already excavated about thirty feet, that was so +much gain to me, and if I should have a six-inch pipe put into my +present well and then driven down and down until it came to a place +where there was plenty of water, I would have all I wanted. + +How far down the pipe would have to be driven, of course they did not +know, but they all agreed that if I drove deep enough I would get all +the water I wanted. This was the only kind of a well, they said, which +one could sink as deep as he pleased without being interfered with by +the water at the bottom. My wife and I then considered the matter, and +ultimately decided that it would be a waste of the money which we had +already spent upon the engine, the pipes, and the little house, and, as +there was nothing else to be done but to drive a well, we would have a +well driven. + +Of course we were both very sorry that the work must be begun again, +but I was especially dissatisfied, for the weather was getting cold, +there was already snow upon the ground, and I was told that work could +not be carried on in winter weather. I lost no time, however, in +making a contract with a well-driver, who assured me that as soon as +the working season should open, which probably would be very early in +the spring, he would come to my place and begin to drive my well. + +The season did open, and so did the pea-blossoms, and the pods actually +began to fill before I saw that well-driver again. I had had a good +deal of correspondence with him in the meantime, urging him to prompt +action, but he always had some good reason for delay. (I found out +afterwards that he was busy fulfilling a contract made before mine, in +which he promised to drive a well as soon as the season should open.) + +At last--it was early in the summer--he came with his derricks, a +steam-engine, a trip-hammer, and a lot of men. They took off the roof +of my house, removed the engine, and set to work. + +For many a long day, and I am sorry to say for many a longer night, +that trip-hammer hammered and banged. On the next day after the +night-work began, one of my neighbors came to me to know what they did +that for. I told him they were anxious to get through. + +"Get through what?" said he. "The earth? If they do that, and your +six-inch pipe comes out in a Chinaman's back yard, he will sue you for +damages." + +When the pipe had been driven through the soft stratum under the old +well, and began to reach firmer ground, the pounding and shaking of the +earth became worse and worse. My wife was obliged to leave home with +our child. + +"If he is to do without both water and sleep," said she, "he cannot +long survive." And I agreed with her. + +She departed for a pleasant summer resort where her married sister with +her child was staying, and from week to week I received very pleasant +letters from her, telling me of the charms of the place, and dwelling +particularly upon the abundance of cool spring water with which the +house was supplied. + +While this terrible pounding was going on I heard various reports of +its effect upon my neighbors. One of them, an agriculturist, with whom +I had always been on the best of terms, came with a clouded brow. + +"When I first felt those shakes," he said, "I thought they were the +effects of seismic disturbances, and I did not mind, but when I found +it was your well I thought I ought to come over to speak about it. I +do not object to the shaking of my barn, because my man tells me the +continual jolting is thrashing out the oats and wheat, but I do not +like to have all my apples and pears shaken off my trees. And then," +said he, "I have a late brood of chickens, and they cannot walk, +because every time they try to make a step they are jolted into the air +about a foot. And again, we have had to give up having soup. We like +soup, but we do not care to have it spout up like a fountain whenever +that hammer comes down." + +I was grieved to trouble this friend, and I asked him what I should do. +"Do you want me to stop the work on the well?" said I. + +"Oh, no," said he, heartily. "Go on with the work. You must have +water, and we will try to stand the bumping. I dare say it is good for +dyspepsia, and the cows are getting used to having the grass jammed up +against their noses. Go ahead; we can stand it in the daytime, but if +you could stop the night-work we would be very glad. Some people may +think it a well-spring of pleasure to be bounced out of bed, but I +don't." + +Mrs. Perch came to me with a face like a squeezed lemon, and asked me +if I could lend her five nails. + +"What sort?" said I. + +"The kind you nail clapboards on with," said she. "There is one of +them been shook entirely off my house by your well. I am in hopes that +before the rest are all shook off I shall get in some money that is +owing me and can afford to buy nails for myself." + +I stopped the night-work, but this was all I could do for these +neighbors. + +My optimist friend was delighted when he heard of my driven well. He +lived so far away that he and his mother were not disturbed by the +jarring of the ground. Now he was sure that some of the internal +secrets of the earth would be laid bare, and he rode or drove over +every day to see what we were getting out of the well. I know that he +was afraid we would soon get water, but was too kind-hearted to say so. + +One day the pipe refused to go deeper. No matter how hard it was +struck, it bounced up again. When some of the substance it had struck +was brought up it looked like French chalk, and my optimist eagerly +examined it. + +"A French-chalk mine," said he, "would not be a bad thing, but I hoped +that you had struck a bed of mineral gutta-percha. That would be a +grand find." + +But the chalk-bed was at last passed, and we began again to bring up +nothing but common earth. + +"I suppose," said my optimist to me, one morning, "that you must soon +come to water, and if you do I hope it will be hot water." + +"Hot water!" I exclaimed. "I do not want that." + +"Oh, yes, you would, if you had thought about it as much as I have," he +replied. "I lay awake for hours last night, thinking what would happen +if you struck hot water. In the first place, it would be absolutely +pure, because, even if it were possible for germs and bacilli to get +down so deep, they would be boiled before you got them, and then you +could cool that water for drinking. When fresh it would be already +heated for cooking and hot baths. And then--just think of it!--you +could introduce the hot-water system of heating into your house, and +there would be the hot water always ready. But the great thing would +be your garden. Think of the refuse hot water circulating in pipes up +and down and under all your beds! That garden would bloom in the +winter as others do in the summer; at least, you could begin to have +Lima-beans and tomatoes as soon as the frost was out of the air." + +I laughed. "It would take a lot of pumping," I said, "to do all that +with the hot water." + +"Oh, I forgot to say," he cried, with sparkling eyes, "that I do not +believe you would ever have any more pumping to do. You have now gone +down so far that I am sure whatever you find will force itself up. It +will spout high into the air or through all your pipes, and run always." + +Phineas Colwell was by when this was said, and he must have gone down +to Mrs. Betty Perch's house to talk it over with her, for in the +afternoon she came to see me. + +"I understand," said she, "that you are trying to get hot water out of +your well, and that there is likely to be a lot more than you need, so +that it will run down by the side of the road. I just want to say that +if a stream of hot water comes down past my house some of the children +will be bound to get into it and be scalded to death, and I came to say +that if that well is going to squirt b'iling water I'd like to have +notice so that I can move, though where a widow with so many orphans is +going to move to nobody knows. Mr. Colwell says that if you had got +him to tell you where to put that well there would have been no danger +of this sort of thing." + +The next day the optimist came to me, his face fairly blazing with a +new idea. "I rode over on purpose to urge you," he cried, "if you +should strike hot water, not to stop there. Go on, and, by George! you +may strike fire." + +"Heavens!" I cried. + +"Oh, quite the opposite," said he. "But do not let us joke. I think +that would be the grandest thing of this age. Think of a fire well, +with the flames shooting up perhaps a hundred feet into the air!" + +I wish Phineas Colwell had not been there. As it was, he turned pale +and sat down on the wall. + +"You look astonished!" exclaimed the optimist, "but listen to me. You +have not thought of this thing as I have. If you should strike fire +your fortune would be made. By a system of reflectors you could light +up the whole country. By means of tiles and pipes this region could be +made tropical. You could warm all the houses in the neighborhood with +hot air. And then the power you could generate--just think of it! +Heat is power; the cost of power is the fuel. You could furnish power +to all who wanted it. You could fill this region with industries. My +dear sir, you must excuse my agitation, but if you should strike fire +there is no limit to the possibilities of achievement." + +"But I want water," said I. "Fire would not take the place of that." + +"Oh, water is a trifle," said he. "You could have pipes laid from +town; it is only about two miles. But fire! Nobody has yet gone down +deep enough for that. You have your future in your hands." + +As I did not care to connect my future with fire, this idea did not +strike me very forcibly, but it struck Phineas Colwell. He did not say +anything to me, but after I had gone he went to the well-drivers. + +"If you feel them pipes getting hot," he said to them, "I warn you to +stop. I have been in countries where there are volcanoes, and I know +what they are. There's enough of them in this world, and there's no +need of making new ones." + +In the afternoon a wagoner, who happened to be passing, brought me a +note from Mrs. Perch, very badly spelled, asking if I would let one of +my men bring her a pail of water, for she could not think of coming +herself or letting any of the children come near my place if spouting +fires were expected. + +The well-driving had gone on and on, with intermissions on account of +sickness in the families of the various workmen, until it had reached +the limit which I had fixed, and we had not found water in sufficient +quantity, hot or cold, nor had we struck fire, or anything else worth +having. + +The well-drivers and some specialists were of the opinion that if I +were to go ten, twenty, or perhaps a hundred feet deeper, I would be +very likely to get all the water I wanted. But, of course, they could +not tell how deep they must go, for some wells were over a thousand +feet deep. I shook my head at this. There seemed to be only one thing +certain about this drilling business, and that was the expense. I +declined to go any deeper. + +"I think," a facetious neighbor said to me, "it would be cheaper for +you to buy a lot of Apollinaris water,--at wholesale rates, of +course,--and let your men open so many bottles a day and empty them +into your tank. You would find that would pay better in the long run." + +Phineas Colwell told me that when he had informed Mrs. Perch that I was +going to stop operations, she was in a dreadful state of mind. After +all she had undergone, she said, it was simply cruel to think of my +stopping before I got water, and that after having dried up her spring! + +This is what Phineas said she said, but when next I met her she told me +that he had declared that if I had put the well where he thought it +ought to be, I should have been having all the water I wanted before +now. + +My optimist was dreadfully cast down when he heard that I would drive +no deeper. + +"I have been afraid of this," he said. "I have, been afraid of it. +And if circumstances had so arranged themselves that I should have +command of money, I should have been glad to assume the expense of +deeper explorations. I have been thinking a great deal about the +matter, and I feel quite sure that even if you did not get water or +anything else that might prove of value to you, it would be a great +advantage to have a pipe sunk into the earth to the depth of, say, one +thousand feet." + +"What possible advantage could that be?" I asked. + +"I will tell you," he said. "You would then have one of the grandest +opportunities ever offered to man of constructing a gravity-engine. +This would be an engine which would be of no expense at all to run. It +would need no fuel. Gravity would be the power. It would work a pump +splendidly. You could start it when you liked and stop it when you +liked." + +"Pump!" said I. "What is the good of a pump without water?" + +"Oh, of course you would have to have water," he answered. "But, no +matter how you get it, you will have to pump it up to your tank so as +to make it circulate over your house. Now, my gravity-pump would do +this beautifully. You see, the pump would be arranged with cog-wheels +and all that sort of thing, and the power would be supplied by a +weight, which would be a cylinder of lead or iron, fastened to a rope +and run down inside your pipe. Just think of it! It would run down a +thousand feet, and where is there anything worked by weight that has +such a fall as that?" + +I laughed. "That is all very well," said I. "But how about the power +required to wind that weight up again when it got to the bottom? I +should have to have an engine to do that." + +"Oh, no," said he. "I have planned the thing better than that. You +see, the greater the weight the greater the power and the velocity. +Now, if you take a solid cylinder of lead about four inches in +diameter, so that it would slip easily down your pipe,--you might +grease it, for that matter,--and twenty feet in length, it would be an +enormous weight, and in slowly descending for about an hour a day--for +that would be long enough for your pumping--and going down a thousand +feet, it would run your engine for a year. Now, then, at the end of +the year you could not expect to haul that weight up again. You would +have a trigger arrangement which would detach it from the rope when it +got to the bottom. Then you would wind up your rope,--a man could do +that in a short time,--and you would attach another cylinder of lead, +and that would run your engine for another year, minus a few days, +because it would only go down nine hundred and eighty feet. The next +year you would put on another cylinder, and so on. I have not worked +out the figures exactly, but I think that in this way your engine would +run for thirty years before the pipe became entirely filled with +cylinders. That would be probably as long as you would care to have +water forced into the house." + +"Yes"' said I, "I think that is likely." + +He saw that his scheme did not strike me favorably. Suddenly a light +flashed across his face. + +"I tell you what you can do with your pipe," he said, "just as it is. +You can set up a clock over it which would run for forty years without +winding." + +I smiled, and he turned sadly away to his horse; but he had not ridden +ten yards before he came back and called to me over the wall. + +"If the earth at the bottom of your pipe should ever yield to pressure +and give way, and if water or gas, or--anything, should be squirted out +of it, I beg you will let me know as soon as possible." + +I promised to do so. + +When the pounding was at an end my wife and child came home. But the +season continued dry, and even their presence could not counteract the +feeling of aridity which seemed to permeate everything which belonged +to us, material or immaterial. We had a great deal of commiseration +from our neighbors. I think even Mrs. Betty Perch began to pity us a +little, for her spring had begun to trickle again in a small way, and +she sent word to me that if we were really in need of water she would +be willing to divide with us. Phineas Colwell was sorry for us, of +course, but he could not help feeling and saying that if I had +consulted him the misfortune would have been prevented. + +It was late in the summer when my wife returned, and when she made her +first visit of inspection to the grounds and gardens, her eyes, of +course, fell upon the unfinished well. She was shocked. + +"I never saw such a scene of wreckage," she said. "It looks like a +Western town after a cyclone. I think the best thing you can do is to +have this dreadful litter cleared up, the ground smoothed and raked, +the wall mended, and the roof put back on that little house, and then +if we can make anybody believe it is an ice-house, so much the better." + +This was good advice, and I sent for a man to put the vicinity of the +well in order and give it the air of neatness which characterizes the +rest of our home. + +The man who came was named Mr. Barnet. He was a contemplative fellow +with a pipe in his mouth. After having worked at the place for half a +day he sent for me and said: + +"I'll tell you what I would do if I was in your place. I'd put that +pump-house in order, and I'd set up the engine, and put the pump down +into that thirty-foot well you first dug, and I'd pump water into my +house." + +I looked at him in amazement. + +"There's lots of water in that well," he continued, "and if there's +that much now in this drought, you will surely have ever so much more +when the weather isn't so dry. I have measured the water, and I know." + +I could not understand him. It seemed to me that he was talking +wildly. He filled his pipe and lighted it and sat upon the wall. + +"Now," said he, after he had taken a few puffs, "I'll tell you where +the trouble's been with your well. People are always in too big a +hurry in this world about all sorts of things as well as wells. I am a +well-digger and I know all about them. We know if there is any water +in the ground it will always find its way to the deepest hole there is, +and we dig a well so as to give it a deep hole to go to in the place +where we want it. But you can't expect the water to come to that hole +just the very day it's finished. Of course you will get some, because +it's right there in the neighborhood, but there is always a lot more +that will come if you give it time. It's got to make little channels +and passages for itself, and of course it takes time to do that. It's +like settling up a new country. Only a few pioneers come at first, and +you have to wait for the population to flow in. This being a dry +season, and the water in the ground a little sluggish on that account, +it was a good while finding out where your well was. If I had happened +along when you was talking about a well, I think I should have said to +you that I knew a proverb which would about fit your case, and that is: +`Let well enough alone.'" + +I felt like taking this good man by the hand, but I did not. I only +told him to go ahead and do everything that was proper. + +The next morning, as I was going to the well, I saw Phineas Colwell +coming down the lane and Mrs. Betty Perch coming up it. I did not wish +them to question me, so I stepped behind some bushes. When they met +they stopped. + +"Upon my word!" exclaimed Mrs. Betty, "if he isn't going to work again +on that everlasting well! If he's got so much money he don't know what +to do with it, I could tell him that there's people in this world, and +not far away either, who would be the better for some of it. It's a +sin and a shame and an abomination. Do you believe, Mr. Colwell, that +there is the least chance in the world of his ever getting water enough +out of that well to shave himself with?" + +"Mrs. Perch," said Phineas, "it ain't no use talking about that well. +It ain't no use, and it never can be no use, because it's in the wrong +place. If he ever pumps water out of that well into his house I'll +do--" + +"What will you do?" asked Mr. Barnet, who just then appeared from the +recesses of the engine-house. + +"I'll do anything on this earth that you choose to name," said Phineas. +"I am safe, whatever it is." + +"Well, then," said Mr. Barnet, knocking the ashes from his pipe +preparatory to filling it again, "will you marry Mrs. Perch?" + +Phineas laughed. "Yes," he said. "I promised I would do anything, and +I'll promise that." + +"A slim chance for me," said Mrs. Betty, "even if I'd have you." And +she marched on with her nose in the air. + +When Mr. Barnet got fairly to work with his derrick, his men, and his +buckets, he found that there was a good deal more to do than he had +expected. The well-drivers had injured the original well by breaking +some of the tiles which lined it, and these had to be taken out and +others put in, and in the course of this work other improvements +suggested themselves and were made. Several times operations were +delayed by sickness in the family of Mr. Barnet, and also in the +families of his workmen, but still the work went on in a very fair +manner, although much more slowly than had been supposed by any one. +But in the course of time--I will not say how much time--the work was +finished, the engine was in its place, and it pumped water into my +house, and every day since then it has pumped all the water we need, +pure, cold, and delicious. + +Knowing the promise Phineas Colwell had made, and feeling desirous of +having everything which concerned my well settled and finished, I went +to look for him to remind him of his duty toward Mrs. Perch, but I +could not find that naval and military mechanical agriculturist. He +had gone away to take a job or a contract,--I could not discover +which,--and he has not since appeared in our neighborhood. Mrs. Perch +is very severe on me about this. + +"There's plenty of bad things come out of that well," she said, "but I +never thought anything bad enough would come out of it to make Mr. +Colwell go away and leave me to keep on being a widow with all them +orphans." + + + + +MR. TOLMAN + +Mr. Tolman was a gentleman whose apparent age was of a varying +character. At times, when deep in thought on business matters or other +affairs, one might have thought him fifty-five or fifty-seven, or even +sixty. Ordinarily, however, when things were running along in a +satisfactory and commonplace way, he appeared to be about fifty years +old, while upon some extraordinary occasions, when the world assumed an +unusually attractive aspect, his age seemed to run down to forty-five +or less. + +He was the head of a business firm. In fact, he was the only member of +it. The firm was known as Pusey and Co. But Pusey had long been dead +and the "Co.," of which Mr. Tolman had been a member, was dissolved. +Our elderly hero, having bought out the business, firm-name and all, +for many years had carried it on with success and profit. His +counting-house was a small and quiet place, but a great deal of money +had been made in it. Mr. Tolman was rich--very rich indeed. + +And yet, as he sat in his counting-room one winter evening, he looked +his oldest. He had on his hat and his overcoat, his gloves and his fur +collar. Every one else in the establishment had gone home, and he, +with the keys in his hand, was ready to lock up and leave also. He +often stayed later than any one else, and left the keys with Mr. +Canterfield, the head clerk, as he passed his house on his way home. + +Mr. Tolman seemed in no hurry to go. He simply sat and thought, and +increased his apparent age. The truth was, he did not want to go home. +He was tired of going home. This was not because his home was not a +pleasant one. No single gentleman in the city had a handsomer or more +comfortable suite of rooms. It was not because he felt lonely, or +regretted that a wife and children did not brighten and enliven his +home. He was perfectly satisfied to be a bachelor. The conditions +suited him exactly. But, in spite of all this, he was tired of going +home. + +"I wish," said Mr. Tolman to himself, "that I could feel some interest +in going home." Then he rose and took a turn or two up and down the +room. But as that did not seem to give him any more interest in the +matter, he sat down again. "I wish it were necessary for me to go +home," said he, "but it isn't." So then he fell again to thinking. +"What I need," he said, after a while, "is to depend more upon +myself--to feel that I am necessary to myself. Just now I'm not. I'll +stop going home--at least, in this way. Where's the sense in envying +other men, when I can have all that they have just as well as not? And +I'll have it, too," said Mr. Tolman, as he went out and locked the +doors. Once in the streets, and walking rapidly, his ideas shaped +themselves easily and readily into a plan which, by the time he reached +the house of his head clerk, was quite matured. Mr. Canterfield was +just going down to dinner as his employer rang the bell, so he opened +the door himself. "I will detain you but a minute or two," said Mr. +Tolman, handing the keys to Mr. Canterfield. "Shall we step into the +parlor?" + +When his employer had gone, and Mr. Canterfield had joined his family +at the dinner-table, his wife immediately asked him what Mr. Tolman +wanted. + +"Only to say that he is going away to-morrow, and that I am to attend +to the business, and send his personal letters to ----," naming a city +not a hundred miles away. + +"How long is he going to stay?" + +"He didn't say," answered Mr. Canterfield. + +"I'll tell you what he ought to do," said the lady. "He ought to make +you a partner in the firm, and then he could go away and stay as long +as he pleased." + +"He can do that now," returned her husband. "He has made a good many +trips since I have been with him, and things have gone on very much in +the same way as when he is here. He knows that." + +"But still you'd like to be a partner?" + +"Oh, yes," said Mr. Canterfield. + +"And common gratitude ought to prompt him to make you one," said his +wife. + +Mr. Tolman went home and wrote a will. He left all his property, with +the exception of a few legacies, to the richest and most powerful +charitable organization in the country. + +"People will think I am crazy," said he to himself, "and if I should +die while I am carrying out my plan, I will leave the task of defending +my sanity to people who are able to make a good fight for me." And +before he went to bed his will was signed and witnessed. + +The next day he packed a trunk and left for the neighboring city. His +apartments were to be kept in readiness for his return at any time. If +you had seen him walking over to the railroad depot, you would have +taken him for a man of forty-five. + +When he arrived at his destination, Mr. Tolman established himself +temporarily at a hotel, and spent the next three or four days in +walking about the city looking for what he wanted. What he wanted was +rather difficult to define, but the way in which he put the matter to +himself was something like this: + +"I would like to find a snug little place where, I can live, and carry +on some business which I can attend to myself, and which will bring me +into contact with people of all sorts--people who will interest me. It +must be a small business, because I don't want to have to work very +hard, and it must be snug and comfortable, because I want to enjoy it. +I would like a shop of some sort, because that brings a man face to +face with his fellow-creatures." + +The city in which he was walking about was one of the best places in +the country in which to find the place of business he desired. It was +full of independent little shops. But Mr. Tolman could not readily +find one which resembled his ideal. A small dry-goods establishment +seemed to presuppose a female proprietor. A grocery store would give +him many interesting customers; but he did not know much about +groceries, and the business did not appear to him to possess any +aesthetic features. + +He was much pleased by a small shop belonging to a taxidermist. It was +exceedingly cosey, and the business was probably not so great as to +overwork any one. He might send the birds and beasts which were +brought to be stuffed to some practical operator, and have him put them +in proper condition for the customers. He might-- But no. It would +be very unsatisfactory to engage in a business of which he knew +absolutely nothing. A taxidermist ought not to blush with ignorance +when asked some simple question about a little dead bird or a defunct +fish. And so he tore himself from the window of this fascinating +place, where, he fancied, had his education been differently managed, +he could in time have shown the world the spectacle of a cheerful and +unblighted Mr. Venus. + +The shop which at last appeared to suit him best was one which he had +passed and looked at several times before it struck him favorably. It +was in a small brick house in a side street, but not far from one of +the main business avenues of the city. The shop seemed devoted to +articles of stationery and small notions of various kinds not easy to +be classified. He had stopped to look at three penknives fastened to a +card, which was propped up in the little show-window, supported on one +side by a chess-board with "History of Asia" in gilt letters on the +back, and on the other by a small violin labelled "1 dollar." And as +he gazed past these articles into the interior of the shop, which was +now lighted up, it gradually dawned upon him that it was something like +his ideal of an attractive and interesting business place. At any +rate, he would go in and look at it. He did not care for a violin, +even at the low price marked on the one in the window, but a new +pocket-knife might be useful. So he walked in and asked to look at +pocket-knives. + +The shop was in charge of a very pleasant old lady of about sixty, who +sat sewing behind the little counter. While she went to the window and +very carefully reached over the articles displayed therein to get the +card of penknives, Mr. Tolman looked about him. The shop was quite +small, but there seemed to be a good deal in it. There were shelves +behind the counter, and there were shelves on the opposite wall, and +they all seemed well filled with something or other. In the corner +near the old lady's chair was a little coal stove with a bright fire in +it, and at the back of the shop, at the top of two steps, was a glass +door partly open, through which he saw a small room, with a red carpet +on the floor, and a little table apparently set for a meal. + +Mr. Tolman looked at the knives when the old lady showed them to him, +and after a good deal of consideration he selected one which he thought +would be a good knife to give to a boy. Then he looked over some +things in the way of paper-cutters, whist-markers, and such small +matters, which were in a glass case on the counter. And while he +looked at them he talked to the old lady. + +She was a friendly, sociable body, very glad to have any one to talk +to, and so it was not at all difficult for Mr. Tolman, by some general +remarks, to draw from her a great many points about herself and her +shop. She was a widow, with a son who, from her remarks, must have +been forty years old. He was connected with a mercantile +establishment, and they had lived here for a long time. While her son +was a salesman, and came home every evening, this was very pleasant. +But after he became a commercial traveller, and was away from the city +for months at a time, she did not like it at all. It was very lonely +for her. + +Mr. Tolman's heart rose within him, but he did not interrupt her. + +"If I could do it," said she, "I would give up this place, and go and +live with my sister in the country. It would be better for both of us, +and Henry could come there just as well as here when he gets back from +his trips." + +"Why don't you sell out?" asked Mr. Tolman, a little fearfully, for he +began to think that all this was too easy sailing to be entirely safe. + +"That would not be easy," said she, with a smile. "It might be a long +time before we could find any one who would want to take the place. We +have a fair trade in the store, but it isn't what it used to be when +times were better. And the library is falling off, too. Most of the +books are getting pretty old, and it don't pay to spend much money for +new ones now." + +"The library!" said Mr. Tolman. "Have you a library?" + +"Oh, yes," replied the old lady. "I've had a circulating library here +for nearly fifteen years. There it is on those two upper shelves +behind you." + +Mr. Tolman turned, and beheld two long rows of books in brown-paper +covers, with a short step-ladder, standing near the door of the inner +room, by which these shelves might be reached. This pleased him +greatly. He had had no idea that there was a library here. + +"I declare!" said he. "It must be very pleasant to manage a +circulating library--a small one like this, I mean. I shouldn't mind +going into a business of the kind myself." + +The old lady looked up, surprised. Did he wish to go into business? +She had not supposed that, just from looking at him. + +Mr. Tolman explained his views to her. He did not tell what he had +been doing in the way of business, or what Mr. Canterfield was doing +for him now. He merely stated his present wishes, and acknowledged to +her that it was the attractiveness of her establishment that had led +him to come in. + +"Then you do not want the penknife?" she said quickly. + +"Oh, yes, I do," said he. "And I really believe, if we can come to +terms, that I would like the two other knives, together with the rest +of your stock in trade." + +The old lady laughed a little nervously. She hoped very much indeed +that they could come to terms. She brought a chair from the back room, +and Mr. Tolman sat down with her by the stove to talk it over. Few +customers came in to interrupt them, and they talked the matter over +very thoroughly. They both came to the conclusion that there would be +no difficulty about terms, nor about Mr. Tolman's ability to carry on +the business after a very little instruction from the present +proprietress. When Mr. Tolman left, it was with the understanding that +he was to call again in a couple of days, when the son Henry would be +at home, and matters could be definitely arranged. + +When the three met, the bargain was soon struck. As each party was so +desirous of making it, few difficulties were interposed. The old lady, +indeed, was in favor of some delay in the transfer of the +establishment, as she would like to clean and dust every shelf and +corner and every article in the place. But Mr. Tolman was in a hurry +to take possession; and as the son Henry would have to start off on +another trip in a short time, he wanted to see his mother moved and +settled before he left. There was not much to move but trunks and +bandboxes, and some antiquated pieces of furniture of special value to +the old lady, for Mr. Tolman insisted on buying everything in the +house, just as it stood. The whole thing did not cost him, he said to +himself, as much as some of his acquaintances would pay for a horse. +The methodical son Henry took an account of stock, and Mr. Tolman took +several lessons from the old lady, in which she explained to him how to +find out the selling prices of the various articles from the marks on +the little tags attached to them. And she particularly instructed him +in the management of the circulating library. She informed him of the +character of the books, and, as far as possible, of the character of +the regular patrons. She told him whom he might trust to take out a +book without paying for the one brought in, if they didn't happen to +have the change with them, and she indicated with little crosses +opposite their names those persons who should be required to pay cash +down for what they had had, before receiving further benefits. + +It was astonishing to see what interest Mr. Tolman took in all this. +He was really anxious to meet some of the people about whom the old +lady discoursed. He tried, too, to remember a few of the many things +she told him of her methods of buying and selling, and the general +management of her shop; and he probably did not forget more than three +fourths of what she told him. + +Finally everything was settled to the satisfaction of the two male +parties to the bargain,--although the old lady thought of a hundred +things she would yet like to do,--and one fine frosty afternoon a +cart-load of furniture and baggage left the door, the old lady and her +son took leave of the old place, and Mr. Tolman was left sitting behind +the little counter, the sole manager and proprietor of a circulating +library and a stationery and notion shop. He laughed when he thought +of it, but he rubbed his hands and felt very well satisfied. + +"There is nothing really crazy about it," he said to himself. "If +there is a thing that I think I would like, and I can afford to have +it, and there's no harm in it, why not have it?" + +There was nobody there to say anything against this, so Mr. Tolman +rubbed his hands again before the fire, and rose to walk up and down +his shop, and wonder who would be his first customer. + +In the course of twenty minutes a little boy opened the door and came +in. Mr. Tolman hastened behind the counter to receive his commands. +The little boy wanted two sheets of note-paper and an envelope. + +"Any particular kind!" asked Mr. Tolman. + +The boy didn't know of any particular variety being desired. He +thought the same kind she always got would do. And he looked very hard +at Mr. Tolman, evidently wondering at the change in the shopkeeper, but +asking no questions. + +"You are a regular customer, I suppose," said Mr. Tolman, opening +several boxes of paper which he had taken down from the shelves. "I +have just begun business here, and don't know what kind of paper you +have been in the habit of buying. But I suppose this will do." And he +took out a couple of sheets of the best, with an envelope to match. +These he carefully tied up in a piece of thin brown paper, and gave to +the boy, who handed him three cents. Mr. Tolman took them, smiled, and +then, having made a rapid calculation, he called to the boy, who was +just opening the door, and gave him back one cent. + +"You have paid me too much," he said. + +The boy took the cent, looked at Mr. Tolman, and then got out of the +store as quickly as he could. + +"Such profits as that are enormous," said Mr. Tolman, "but I suppose +the small sales balance them." This Mr. Tolman subsequently found to +be the case. + +One or two other customers came in in the course of the afternoon, and +about dark the people who took out books began to arrive. These kept +Mr. Tolman very busy. He not only had to do a good deal of entering +and cancelling, but he had to answer a great many questions about the +change in proprietorship, and the probability of his getting in some +new books, with suggestions as to the quantity and character of these, +mingled with a few dissatisfied remarks in regard to the volumes +already on hand. + +Every one seemed sorry that the old lady had gone away. But Mr. Tolman +was so pleasant and anxious to please, and took such an interest in +their selection of books, that only one of the subscribers appeared to +take the change very much to heart. This was a young man who was +forty-three cents in arrears. He was a long time selecting a book, and +when at last he brought it to Mr. Tolman to be entered, he told him in +a low voice that he hoped there would be no objection to letting his +account run on for a little while longer. On the first of the month he +would settle it, and then he hoped to be able to pay cash whenever he +brought in a book. + +Mr. Tolman looked for his name on the old lady's list, and, finding no +cross against it, told him that it was all right, and that the first of +the month would do very well. The young man went away perfectly +satisfied with the new librarian. Thus did Mr. Tolman begin to build +up his popularity. As the evening grew on he found himself becoming +very hungry. But he did not like to shut up the shop, for every now +and then some one dropped in, sometimes to ask what time it was, and +sometimes to make a little purchase, while there were still some +library patrons coming in at intervals. + +However, taking courage during a short rest from customers, he put up +the shutters, locked the door, and hurried off to a hotel, where he +partook of a meal such as few keepers of little shops ever think of +indulging in. + +The next morning Mr. Tolman got his own breakfast. This was +delightful. He had seen how cosily the old lady had spread her table +in the little back room, where there was a stove suitable for any +cooking he might wish to indulge in, and he longed for such a cosey +meal. There were plenty of stock provisions in the house, which he had +purchased with the rest of the goods, and he went out and bought +himself a fresh loaf of bread. Then he broiled a piece of ham, made +some good strong tea, boiled some eggs, and had a breakfast on the +little round table which, though plain enough, he enjoyed more than any +breakfast at his club which he could remember. He had opened the shop, +and sat facing the glass door, hoping, almost, that there would be some +interruption to his meal. It would seem so much more proper in that +sort of business if he had to get up and go attend to a customer. + +Before the evening of that day Mr. Tolman became convinced that he +would soon be obliged to employ a boy or some one to attend to the +establishment during his absence. After breakfast, a woman recommended +by the old lady came to make his bed and clean up generally, but when +she had gone he was left alone with his shop. He determined not to +allow this responsibility to injure his health, and so at one o'clock +boldly locked the shop door and went out to his lunch. He hoped that +no one would call during his absence, but when he returned he found a +little girl with a pitcher standing at the door. She came to borrow +half a pint of milk. + +"Milk!" exclaimed Mr. Tolman, in surprise. "Why, my child, I have no +milk. I don't even use it in my tea." + +The little girl looked very much disappointed. "Is Mrs. Walker gone +away for good?" said she. + +"Yes," replied Mr. Tolman. "But I would be just as willing to lend you +the milk as she would be, if I had any. Is there any place near here +where you can buy milk?" + +"Oh, yes," said the girl. "You can get it round in the market-house." + +"How much would half a pint cost?" he asked. + +"Three cents," replied the girl. + +"Well, then," said Mr. Tolman, "here are three cents. You can go and +buy the milk for me, and then you can borrow it. Will that suit?" + +The girl thought it would suit very well, and away she went. + +Even this little incident pleased Mr. Tolman. It was so very novel. +When he came back from his dinner in the evening, he found two +circulating library subscribers stamping their feet on the door-step, +and he afterwards heard that several others had called and gone away. +It would certainly injure the library if he suspended business at +meal-times. He could easily have his choice of a hundred boys if he +chose to advertise for one, but he shrank from having a youngster in +the place. It would interfere greatly with his cosiness and his +experiences. He might possibly find a boy who went to school, and who +would be willing to come at noon and in the evening if he were paid +enough. But it would have to be a very steady and responsible boy. He +would think it over before taking any steps. + +He thought it over for a day or two, but he did not spend his whole +time in doing so. When he had no customers, he sauntered about in the +little parlor over the shop, with its odd old furniture, its quaint +prints on the walls, and its absurd ornaments on the mantelpiece. The +other little rooms seemed almost as funny to him, and he was sorry when +the bell on the shop door called him down from their contemplation. It +was pleasant to him to think that he owned all these odd things. The +ownership of the varied goods in the shop also gave him an agreeable +feeling which none of his other possessions had ever afforded him. It +was all so odd and novel. + +He liked much to look over the books in the library. Many of them were +old novels, the names of which were familiar enough to him, but which +he had never read. He determined to read some of them as soon as he +felt fixed and settled. + +In looking over the book in which the names and accounts of the +subscribers were entered, he amused himself by wondering what sort of +persons they were who had out certain books. Who, for instance, wanted +to read "The Book of Cats," and who could possibly care for "The +Mysteries of Udolpho"? But the unknown person in regard to whom Mr. +Tolman felt the greatest curiosity was the subscriber who now had in +his possession a volume entitled "Dormstock's Logarithms of the +Diapason." + +"How on earth," exclaimed Mr. Tolman, "did such a book get into this +library? And where on earth did the person spring from who would want +to take it out? And not only want to take it," he continued, as he +examined the entry regarding the volume, "but come and have it renewed +one, two, three, four--nine times! He has had that book for eighteen +weeks!" + +Without exactly making up his mind to do so, Mr. Tolman deferred taking +steps toward getting an assistant until P. Glascow, the person in +question, should make an appearance, and it was nearly time for the +book to be brought in again. + +"If I get a boy now," thought Mr. Tolman, "Glascow will be sure to come +and bring the book while I am out." + +In almost exactly two weeks from the date of the last renewal of the +book, P. Glascow came in. It was the middle of the afternoon, and Mr. +Tolman was alone. This investigator of musical philosophy was a quiet +young man of about thirty, wearing a light-brown cloak, and carrying +under one arm a large book. + +P. Glascow was surprised when he heard of the change in the +proprietorship of the library. Still, he hoped that there would be no +objection to his renewing the book which he had with him, and which he +had taken out some time ago. + +"Oh, no," said Mr. Tolman, "none in the world. In fact, I don't +suppose there are any other subscribers who would want it. I have had +the curiosity to look to see if it had ever been taken out before, and +I find it has not." + +The young man smiled quietly. "No," said he, "I suppose not. It is +not every one who would care to study the higher mathematics of music, +especially when treated as Dormstock treats the subject." + +"He seems to go into it pretty deeply," remarked Mr. Tolman, who had +taken up the book. "At least, I should think so, judging from all +these calculations, and problems, and squares, and cubes." + +"Indeed he does," said Glascow. "And although I have had the book some +months, and have more reading time at my disposal than most persons, I +have only reached the fifty-sixth page, and doubt if I shall not have +to review some of that before I can feel that I thoroughly understand +it." + +"And there are three hundred and forty pages in all!" said Mr. Tolman, +compassionately. + +"Yes," replied the other. "But I am quite sure that the matter will +grow easier as I proceed. I have found that out from what I have +already done." + +"You say you have a good deal of leisure?" remarked Mr. Tolman. "Is +the musical business dull at present?" + +"Oh, I'm not in the musical business," said Glascow. "I have a great +love for music, and wish to thoroughly understand it. But my business +is quite different. I am a night druggist, and that is the reason I +have so much leisure for reading." + +"A night druggist?" repeated Mr. Tolman, inquiringly. + +"Yes, sir," said the other. "I am in a large downtown drug store which +is kept open all night, and I go on duty after the day clerks leave." + +"And does that give you more leisure?" asked Mr. Tolman. + +"It seems to," answered Glascow. "I sleep until about noon, and then I +have the rest of the day, until seven o'clock, to myself. I think that +people who work at night can make a more satisfactory use of their own +time than those who work in the daytime. In the summer I can take a +trip on the river, or go somewhere out of town, every day, if I like." + +"Daylight is more available for many things, that is true," said Mr. +Tolman. "But is it not dreadfully lonely sitting in a drug store all +night? There can't be many people to come to buy medicine at night. I +thought there was generally a night-bell to drug stores, by which a +clerk could be awakened if anybody wanted anything." + +"It's not very lonely in our store at night," said Glascow. "In fact, +it's often more lively then than in the daytime. You see, we are right +down among the newspaper offices, and there's always somebody coming in +for soda-water, or cigars, or something or other. The store is a +bright, warm place for the night editors and reporters to meet together +and talk and drink hot soda, and there's always a knot of 'em around +the stove about the time the papers begin to go to press. And they're +a lively set, I can tell you, sir. I've heard some of the best stories +I ever heard in my life told in our place after three o'clock in the +morning." + +"A strange life!" said Mr. Tolman. "Do you know, I never thought that +people amused themselves in that way--and night after night, I suppose." + +"Yes, sir, night after night, Sundays and all." + +The night druggist now took up his book. + +"Going home to read?" asked Mr. Tolman. + +"Well, no," said the other. "It's rather cold this afternoon to read. +I think I'll take a brisk walk." + +"Can't you leave your book until you return!" asked Mr. Tolman. "That +is, if you will come back this way. It's an awkward book to carry +about." + +"Thank you, I will," said Glascow. "I shall come back this way." + +When he had gone, Mr. Tolman took up the book, and began to look over +it more carefully than he had done before. But his examination did not +last long. + +"How anybody of common sense can take any interest in this stuff is +beyond my comprehension," said Mr. Tolman, as he closed the book and +put it on a little shelf behind the counter. + +When Glascow came back, Mr. Tolman asked him to stay and warm himself. +And then, after they had talked for a short time, Mr. Tolman began to +feel hungry. He had his winter appetite, and had lunched early. So +said he to the night druggist, who had opened his "Dormstock," "How +would you like to sit here and read awhile, while I go and get my +dinner? I will light the gas, and you can be very comfortable here, if +you are not in a hurry." + +P. Glascow was in no hurry at all, and was very glad to have some quiet +reading by a warm fire; and so Mr. Tolman left him, feeling perfectly +confident that a man who had been allowed by the old lady to renew a +book nine times must be perfectly trustworthy. + +When Mr. Tolman returned, the two had some further conversation in the +corner by the little stove. + +"It must be rather annoying," said the night druggist, "not to be able +to go out to your meals without shutting up your shop. If you like," +said he, rather hesitatingly, "I will stop in about this time in the +afternoon, and stay here while you go to dinner. I'll be glad to do +this until you get an assistant. I can easily attend to most people +who come in, and others can wait." + +Mr. Tolman jumped at this proposition. It was exactly what he wanted. + +So P. Glascow came every afternoon and read "Dormstock" while Mr. +Tolman went to dinner; and before long he came at lunch-time also. It +was just as convenient as not, he said. He had finished his breakfast, +and would like to read awhile. Mr. Tolman fancied that the night +druggist's lodgings were, perhaps, not very well warmed, which idea +explained the desire to walk rather than read on a cold afternoon. +Glascow's name was entered on the free list, and he always took away +the "Dormstock" at night, because he might have a chance of looking +into it at the store, when custom began to grow slack in the latter +part of the early morning. + +One afternoon there came into the shop a young lady, who brought back +two books which she had had for more than a month. She made no excuses +for keeping the books longer than the prescribed time, but simply +handed them in and paid her fine. Mr. Tolman did not like to take this +money, for it was the first of the kind he had received; but the young +lady looked as if she were well able to afford the luxury of keeping +books over their time, and business was business. So he gravely gave +her her change. Then she said she would like to take out "Dormstock's +Logarithms of the Diapason." + +Mr. Tolman stared at her. She was a bright, handsome young lady, and +looked as if she had very good sense. He could not understand it. But +he told her the book was out. + +"Out!" she said. "Why, it's always out. It seems strange to me that +there should be such a demand for that book. I have been trying to get +it for ever so long." + +"It IS strange," said Mr. Tolman, "but it is certainly in demand. Did +Mrs. Walker ever make you any promises about it?" + +"No," said she, "but I thought my turn would come around some time. +And I particularly want the book just now." + +Mr. Tolman felt somewhat troubled. He knew that the night druggist +ought not to monopolize the volume, and yet he did not wish to +disoblige one who was so useful to him, and who took such an earnest +interest in the book. And he could not temporize with the young lady, +and say that he thought the book would soon be in. He knew it would +not. There were three hundred and forty pages of it. So he merely +remarked that he was sorry. + +"So am I," said the young lady, "very sorry. It so happens that just +now I have a peculiar opportunity for studying that book which may not +occur again." + +There was something in Mr. Tolman's sympathetic face which seemed to +invite her confidence, and she continued. + +"I am a teacher," she said, "and on account of certain circumstances I +have a holiday for a month, which I intended to give up almost entirely +to the study of music, and I particularly wanted "Dormstock." Do you +think there is any chance of its early return, and will you reserve it +for me?" + +"Reserve it!" said Mr. Tolman. "Most certainly I will." And then he +reflected a second or two. "If you will come here the day after +to-morrow, I will be able to tell you something definite." + +She said she would come. + +Mr. Tolman was out a long time at lunch-time the next day. He went to +all the leading book-stores to see if he could buy a copy of +Dormstock's great work. But he was unsuccessful. The booksellers told +him that there was no probability that he could get a copy in the +country, unless, indeed, he found it in the stock of some second-hand +dealer, and that even if he sent to England for it, where it was +published, it was not likely he could get it, for it had been long out +of print. There was no demand at all for it. The next day he went to +several second-hand stores, but no "Dormstock" could he find. + +When he came back he spoke to Glascow on the subject. He was sorry to +do so, but thought that simple justice compelled him to mention the +matter. The night druggist was thrown into a perturbed state of mind +by the information that some one wanted his beloved book. + +"A woman!" he exclaimed. "Why, she would not understand two pages out +of the whole of it. It is too bad. I didn't suppose any one would +want this book." + +"Do not disturb yourself too much," said Mr. Tolman. "I am not sure +that you ought to give it up." + +"I am very glad to hear you say so," said Glascow. "I have no doubt it +is only a passing fancy with her. I dare say she would really rather +have a good new novel." And then, having heard that the lady was +expected that afternoon, he went out to walk, with the "Dormstock" +under his arm. + +When the young lady arrived, an hour or so later, she was not at all +satisfied to take out a new novel, and was very sorry indeed not to +find the "Logarithms of the Diapason" waiting for her. Mr. Tolman told +her that he had tried to buy another copy of the work, and for this she +expressed herself gratefully. He also found himself compelled to say +that the book was in the possession of a gentleman who had had it for +some time--all the time it had been out, in fact--and had not yet +finished it. + +At this the young lady seemed somewhat nettled. + +"Is it not against the rules for any person to keep one book out so +long?" she asked. + +"No," said Mr. Tolman. "I have looked into that. Our rules are very +simple, and merely say that a book may be renewed by the payment of a +certain sum." + +"Then I am never to have it?" remarked the young lady. + +"Oh, I wouldn't despair about it," said Mr. Tolman. "He has not had +time to reflect upon the matter. He is a reasonable young man, and I +believe that he will be willing to give up his study of the book for a +time and let you take it." + +"No," said she, "I don't wish that. If he is studying, as you say he +is, day and night, I do not wish to interrupt him. I should want the +book at least a month, and that, I suppose, would upset his course of +study entirely. But I do not think any one should begin in a +circulating library to study a book that will take him a year to +finish; for, from what you say, it will take this gentleman at least +that time to finish Dormstock's book." So she went her way. + +When P. Glascow heard all this in the evening, he was very grave. He +had evidently been reflecting. + +"It is not fair," said he. "I ought not to keep the book so long. I +now give it up for a while. You may let her have it when she comes." +And he put the "Dormstock" on the counter, and went and sat down by the +stove. + +Mr. Tolman was grieved. He knew the night druggist had done right, but +still he was sorry for him. "What will you do?" he asked. "Will you +stop your studies?" + +"Oh, no," said Glascow, gazing solemnly into the stove. "I will take +up some other books on the diapason which I have, and so will keep my +ideas fresh on the subject until this lady is done with the book. I do +not really believe she will study it very long." Then he added: "If +it is all the same to you, I will come around here and read, as I have +been doing, until you shall get a regular assistant." + +Mr. Tolman would be delighted to have him come, he said. He had +entirely given up the idea of getting an assistant, but this he did not +say. + +It was some time before the lady came back, and Mr. Tolman was afraid +she was not coming at all. But she did come, and asked for Mrs. +Burney's "Evelina." She smiled when she named the book, and said that +she believed she would have to take a novel, after all, and she had +always wanted to read that one. + +"I wouldn't take a novel if I were you," said Mr. Tolman; and he +triumphantly took down the "Dormstock" and laid it before her. + +She was evidently much pleased, but when he told her of Mr. Glascow's +gentlemanly conduct in the matter, her countenance instantly changed. + +"Not at all," said she, laying down the book. "I will not break up his +study. I will take the `Evelina' if you please." + +And as no persuasion from Mr. Tolman had any effect upon her, she went +away with Mrs. Burney's novel in her muff. + +"Now, then," said Mr. Tolman to Glascow, in the evening, "you may as +well take the book along with you. She won't have it." + +But Glascow would do nothing of the kind. "No," he remarked, as he sat +looking into the stove. "When I said I would let her have it, I meant +it. She'll take it when she sees that it continues to remain in the +library." + +Glascow was mistaken: she did not take it, having the idea that he +would soon conclude that it would be wiser for him to read it than to +let it stand idly on the shelf. + +"It would serve them both right," said Mr. Tolman to himself, "if +somebody else should come and take it." But there was no one else +among his subscribers who would even think of such a thing. + +One day, however, the young lady came in and asked to look at the book. +"Don't think that I am going to take it out," she said, noticing Mr. +Tolman's look of pleasure as he handed her the volume. "I only wish to +see what he says on a certain subject which I am studying now." And so +she sat down by the stove on the chair which Mr. Tolman placed for her, +and opened "Dormstock." + +She sat earnestly poring over the book for half an hour or more, and +then she looked up and said: "I really cannot make out what this part +means. Excuse my troubling you, but I would be very glad if you would +explain the latter part of this passage." + +"Me!" exclaimed Mr. Tolman. "Why, my good madam,--miss, I mean,--I +couldn't explain it to you if it were to save my life. But what page +is it?" said he, looking at his watch. + +"Page twenty-four," answered the young lady. + +"Oh, well, then," said he, "if you can wait ten or fifteen minutes, the +gentleman who has had the book will be here, and I think he can explain +anything in the first part of the work." + +The young lady seemed to hesitate whether to wait or not; but as she +had a certain curiosity to see what sort of a person he was who had +been so absorbed in the book, she concluded to sit a little longer and +look into some other parts of the volume. + +The night druggist soon came in, and when Mr. Tolman introduced him to +the lady, he readily agreed to explain the passage to her if he could. +So Mr. Tolman got him a chair from the inner room, and he also sat down +by the stove. + +The explanation was difficult, but it was achieved at last, and then +the young lady broached the subject of leaving the book unused. This +was discussed for some time, but came to nothing, although Mr. Tolman +put down his afternoon paper and joined in the argument, urging, among +other points, that as the matter now stood he was deprived by the +dead-lock of all income from the book. But even this strong argument +proved of no avail. + +"Then I will tell you what I wish you would do," said Mr. Tolman, as +the young lady rose to go: "come here and look at the book whenever you +wish to do so. I would like to make this more of a reading-room, +anyway. It would give me more company." + +After this the young lady looked into "Dormstock" when she came in; and +as her holidays had been extended by the continued absence of the +family in which she taught, she had plenty of time for study, and came +quite frequently. She often met Glascow in the shop, and on such +occasions they generally consulted "Dormstock," and sometimes had quite +lengthy talks on musical matters. One afternoon they came in together, +having met on their way to the library, and entered into a conversation +on diapasonic logarithms, which continued during the lady's stay in the +shop. + +"The proper thing," thought Mr. Tolman, "would be for these two people +to get married. Then they could take the book and study it to their +heart's content. And they would certainly suit each other, for they +are both greatly attached to musical mathematics and philosophy, and +neither of them either plays or sings, as they have told me. It would +be an admirable match." + +Mr. Tolman thought over this matter a good deal, and at last determined +to mention it to Glascow. When he did so, the young man colored, and +expressed the opinion that it would be of no use to think of such a +thing. But it was evident from his manner and subsequent discourse +that he had thought of it. + +Mr. Tolman gradually became quite anxious on the subject, especially as +the night druggist did not seem inclined to take any steps in the +matter. The weather was now beginning to be warmer, and Mr. Tolman +reflected that the little house and the little shop were probably much +more cosey and comfortable in winter than in summer. There were higher +buildings all about the house, and even now he began to feel that the +circulation of air would be quite as agreeable as the circulation of +books. He thought a good deal about his airy rooms in the neighboring +city. + +"Mr. Glascow," said he, one afternoon, "I have made up my mind to sell +out this business shortly." + +"What!" exclaimed the other. "Do you mean you will give it up and go +away--leave the place altogether?" + +"Yes," replied Mr. Tolman, "I shall give up the place entirely, and +leave the city." + +The night druggist was shocked. He had spent many happy hours in that +shop, and his hours there were now becoming pleasanter than ever. If +Mr. Tolman went away, all this must end. Nothing of the kind could be +expected of any new proprietor. + +"And considering this," continued Mr. Tolman, "I think it would be well +for you to bring your love matters to a conclusion while I am here to +help you." + +"My love matters!" exclaimed Mr. Glascow, with a flush. + +"Yes, certainly," said Mr. Tolman. "I have eyes, and I know all about +it. Now let me tell you what I think. When a thing is to be done, it +ought to be done the first time there is a good chance. That's the way +I do business. Now you might as well come around here to-morrow +afternoon prepared to propose to Miss Edwards. She is due to-morrow, +for she has been two days away. If she doesn't come, we will postpone +the matter until the next day. But you should be ready to-morrow. I +don't believe you can see her much when you don't meet her here, for +that family is expected back very soon, and from what I infer from her +account of her employers, you won't care to visit her at their house." + +The night druggist wanted to think about it. + +"There is nothing to think," said Mr. Tolman. "We know all about the +lady." (He spoke truly, for he had informed himself about both parties +to the affair.) "Take my advice, and be here to-morrow afternoon--and +come rather early." + +The next morning Mr. Tolman went up to his parlor on the second floor, +and brought down two blue stuffed chairs, the best he had, and put them +in the little room back of the shop. He also brought down one or two +knickknacks and put them on the mantelpiece, and he dusted and +brightened up the room as well as he could. He even covered the table +with a red cloth from the parlor. + +When the young lady arrived, he invited her to walk into the back room +to look over some new books he had just got in. If she had known he +proposed to give up the business, she would have thought it rather +strange that he should be buying new books. But she knew nothing of +his intentions. When she was seated at the table whereon the new books +were spread, Mr. Tolman stepped outside of the shop door to watch for +Glascow's approach. He soon appeared. + +"Walk right in," said Mr. Tolman. "She's in the back room looking over +books. I'll wait here, and keep out customers as far as possible. +It's pleasant, and I want a little fresh air. I'll give you twenty +minutes." + +Glascow was pale, but he went in without a word, and Mr. Tolman, with +his hands under his coat-tail, and his feet rather far apart, +established a blockade on the doorstep. He stood there for some time, +looking at the people outside, and wondering what the people inside +were doing. The little girl who had borrowed the milk of him, and who +had never returned it, was about to pass the door; but seeing him +standing there, she crossed over to the other side of the street. But +he did not notice her. He was wondering if it was time to go in. A +boy came up to the door, and wanted to know if he kept Easter eggs. +Mr. Tolman was happy to say he did not. When he had allowed the night +druggist a very liberal twenty minutes, he went in. As he entered the +shop door, giving the bell a very decided ring as he did so, P. Glascow +came down the two steps that led from the inner room. His face showed +that it was all right with him. + +A few days after this Mr. Tolman sold out his stock, good will, and +fixtures, together with the furniture and lease of the house. And who +should he sell out to but to Mr. Glascow! This piece of business was +one of the happiest points in the whole affair. There was no reason +why the happy couple should not be married very soon, and the young +lady was charmed to give up her position as teacher and governess in a +family, and come and take charge of that delightful little store and +that cunning little house, with almost everything in it that they +wanted. + +One thing in the establishment Mr. Tolman refused to sell. That was +Dormstock's great work. He made the couple a present of the volume, +and between two of the earlier pages he placed a bank-note which in +value was very much more than that of the ordinary wedding gift. + +"What are YOU going to do?" they asked of him, when all these things +were settled. And then he told them how he was going back to his +business in the neighboring city, and he told them what it was, and how +he had come to manage a circulating library. They did not think him +crazy. People who studied the logarithms of the diapason would not be +apt to think a man crazy for such a little thing as that. + +When Mr. Tolman returned to the establishment of Pusey & Co., he found +everything going on very satisfactorily. + +"You look ten years younger, sir," said Mr. Canterfield. "You must +have had a very pleasant time. I did not think there was enough to +interest you in ---- for so long a time." + +"Interest me!" exclaimed Mr. Tolman. "Why, objects of interest crowded +on me. I never had a more enjoyable holiday in my life." + +When he went home that evening (and he found himself quite willing to +go), he tore up the will he had made. He now felt that there was no +necessity for proving his sanity. + + + + +MY UNWILLING NEIGHBOR + +I was about twenty-five years old when I began life as the owner of a +vineyard in western Virginia. I bought a large tract of land, the +greater part of which lay upon the sloping side of one of the +foot-hills of the Blue Ridge, the exposure being that most favorable to +the growth of the vine. I am an enthusiastic lover of the country and +of country life, and believed that I should derive more pleasure as +well as profit from the culture of my far-stretching vineyard than I +would from ordinary farm operations. + +I built myself a good house of moderate size upon a little plateau on +the higher part of my estate. Sitting in my porch, smoking my pipe +after the labors of the day, I could look down over my vineyard into a +beautiful valley, with here and there a little curling smoke arising +from some of the few dwellings which were scattered about among the +groves and spreading fields, and above this beauty I could imagine all +my hillside clothed in green and purple. + +My family consisted of myself alone. It is true that I expected some +day that there would be others in my house besides myself, but I was +not ready for this yet. + +During the summer I found it very pleasant to live by myself. It was a +novelty, and I could arrange and manage everything in my own fashion, +which was a pleasure I had not enjoyed when I lived in my father's +house. But when winter came I found it very lonely. Even my servants +lived in a cabin at some little distance, and there were many dark and +stormy evenings when the company even of a bore would have been welcome +to me. Sometimes I walked over to the town and visited my friends +there, but this was not feasible on stormy nights, and the winter +seemed to me a very long one. + +But spring came, outdoor operations began, and for a few weeks I felt +again that I was all-sufficient for my own pleasure and comfort. Then +came a change. One of those seasons of bad and stormy weather which so +frequently follow an early spring settled down upon my spirits and my +hillside. It rained, it was cold, fierce winds blew, and I became more +anxious for somebody to talk to than I had been at any time during the +winter. + +One night, when a very bad storm was raging, I went to bed early, and +as I lay awake I revolved in my mind a scheme of which I had frequently +thought before. I would build a neat little house on my grounds, not +very far away from my house, but not too near, and I would ask Jack +Brandiger to come there and live. Jack was a friend of mine who was +reading law in the town, and it seemed to me that it would be much more +pleasant, and even more profitable, to read law on a pretty hillside +overlooking a charming valley, with woods and mountains behind and +above him, where he could ramble to his heart's content. + +I had thought of asking Jack to come and live with me, but this idea I +soon dismissed. I am a very particular person, and Jack was not. He +left his pipes about in all sorts of places--sometimes when they were +still lighted. When he came to see me he was quite as likely to put +his hat over the inkstand as to put it anywhere else. But if Jack +lived at a little distance, and we could go backward and forward to see +each other whenever we pleased, that would be quite another thing. He +could do as he pleased in his own house, and I could do as I pleased in +mine, and we might have many pleasant evenings together. This was a +cheering idea, and I was planning how we might arrange with the negro +woman who managed my household affairs to attend also to those of Jack +when I fell asleep. + +I did not sleep long before I was awakened by the increased violence of +the storm. My house shook with the fury of the wind. + +The rain seemed to be pouring on its roof and northern side as if there +were a waterfall above us, and every now and then I could hear a shower +of hailstones rattling against the shutters. My bedroom was one of the +rooms on the lower floor, and even there I could hear the pounding of +the deluge and the hailstones upon the roof. + +All this was very doleful, and had a tendency to depress the spirits of +a man awake and alone in a good-sized house. But I shook off this +depression. It was, not agreeable to be up here by myself in such a +terrible storm, but there was nothing to be afraid of, as my house was +new and very strongly built, being constructed of logs, weather-boarded +outside and ceiled within. It would require a hurricane to blow off +the roof, and I believed my shutters to be hail-proof. So, as there +was no reason to stay awake, I turned over and went to sleep. + +I do not know how long it was before I was awakened again, this time +not by the noise of the storm, but by a curious movement of my +bedstead. I had once felt the slight shock of an earthquake, and it +seemed to me that this must be something of the kind. Certainly my bed +moved under me. I sat up. The room was pitchy dark. In a moment I +felt another movement, but this time it did not seem to me to resemble +an earthquake shock. Such motion, I think, is generally in horizontal +directions, while that which I felt was more like the movement of a +ship upon the water. The storm was at its height; the wind raged and +roared, and the rain seemed to be pouring down as heavily as ever. + +I was about to get up and light the lamp, for even the faintest +candle-flame would be some sort of company at such a grewsome moment, +when my bedstead gave another movement, more shiplike than before. It +actually lurched forward as if it were descending into the trough of +the sea, but, unlike a ship, it did not rise again, but remained in +such a slanting position that I began to slide down toward the foot. I +believe that if it had not been a bedstead provided with a footboard, I +should have slipped out upon the floor. + +I did not jump out of bed. I did not do anything. I was trying to +think, to understand the situation, to find out whether I was asleep or +awake, when I became aware of noises in the room and all over the house +which even through the din of the storm made themselves noticed by +their peculiarity. Tables, everything in the room, seemed to be +grating and grinding on the floor, and in a moment there was a crash. +I knew what that meant; my lamp had slipped off the table. Any doubt +on that point would have been dispelled by the smell of kerosene which +soon filled the air of the room. + +The motion of the bed, which I now believe must have been the motion of +the whole house, still continued; but the grating noises in the room +gradually ceased, from which I inferred that the furniture had brought +up against the front wall of the room. + +It now was impossible for me to get up and strike a light, for to do so +with kerosene oil all over the floor and its vapor diffused through the +room would probably result in setting the house on fire. So I must +stay in darkness and wait. I do not think I was very much +frightened--I was so astonished that there was no room in my mind for +fear. In fact, all my mental energies were occupied in trying to find +out what had happened. It required, however, only a few more minutes +of reflection, and a few more minutes of the grating, bumping, +trembling of my house, to enable me to make up my mind what was +happening. My house was sliding downhill! + +The wind must have blown the building from its foundations, and upon +the slippery surface of the hillside, probably lashed into liquid mud +by the pouring rain, it was making its way down toward the valley! In +a flash my mind's eye ran over the whole surface of the country beneath +me as far as I knew it. I was almost positive that there was no +precipice, no terrible chasm into which my house might fall. There was +nothing but sloping hillside, and beneath that a wide stretch of fields. + +Now there was a new and sudden noise of heavy objects falling upon the +roof, and I knew what that meant: my chimney had been wrenched from its +foundations, and the upper part of it had now toppled over. I could +hear, through the storm, the bricks banging and sliding upon the +slanting roof. Continuous sounds of cracking and snapping came to me +through the closed front windows, and these were caused, I supposed, by +the destruction of the stakes of my vines as the heavy house moved over +them. + +Of course, when I thoroughly understood the state of the case, my first +impulse was to spring out of bed, and, as quickly as possible, to get +out of that thumping and sliding house. But I restrained myself. The +floor might be covered with broken glass, I might not be able to find +my clothes in the darkness and in the jumble of furniture at the end of +the room, and even if I could dress myself, it would be folly to jump +out in the midst of that raging storm into a probable mass of wreckage +which I could not see. It would be far better to remain dry and warm +under my roof. There was no reason whatever to suppose that the house +would go to pieces, or that it would turn over. It must stop some time +or other, and, until it did so, I would be safer in my bed than +anywhere else. Therefore in my bed I stayed. + +Sitting upright, with my feet pressed against the footboard, I listened +and felt. The noises of the storm, and the cracking and the snapping +and grinding before me and under me, still continued, although I +sometimes thought that the wind was moderating a little, and that the +strange motion was becoming more regular. I believed the house was +moving faster than when it first began its strange career, but that it +was sliding over a smooth surface. Now I noticed a succession of loud +cracks and snaps at the front of the house, and, from the character of +the sounds, I concluded that my little front porch, which had been +acting as a cutwater at the bow of my shiplike house, had yielded at +last to the rough contact with the ground, and would probably soon be +torn away. This did not disturb me, for the house must still be firm. + +It was not long before I perceived that the slanting of my bed was +becoming less and less, and also I was quite sure that the house was +moving more slowly. Then the crackings and snappings before my front +wall ceased altogether. The bed resumed its ordinary horizontal +position, and although I did not know at what moment the house had +ceased sliding and had come to a standstill, I was sure that it had +done so. It was now resting upon a level surface. The room was still +perfectly dark, and the storm continued. It was useless for me to get +up until daylight came,--I could not see what had happened,--so I lay +back upon my pillow and tried to imagine upon what level portion of my +farm I had stranded. While doing this I fell asleep. + +When I woke, a little light was stealing into the room through the +blinds of my shutters. I quickly slipped out of bed, opened a window, +and looked out. Day was just breaking, the rain and wind had ceased, +and I could discern objects. But it seemed as if I needed some light +in my brain to enable me to comprehend what I saw. My eyes fell upon +nothing familiar. + +I did not stop to investigate, however, from my window. I found my +clothes huddled together with the furniture at the front end of the +room, and as soon as I was dressed I went into the hall and then to my +front door. I quickly jerked this open and was about to step outside +when, suddenly, I stopped. I was positive that my front porch had been +destroyed. But there I saw a porch a little lower than mine and a +great deal wider, and on the other side of it, not more than eight feet +from me, was a window--the window of a house, and on the other side of +the window was a face--the face of a young girl! As I stood staring in +blank amazement at the house which presented itself at my front door, +the face at the window disappeared, and I was left to contemplate the +scene by myself. I ran to my back door and threw it open. There I +saw, stretching up the fields and far up the hillside, the wide path +which my house had made as it came down from its elevated position to +the valley beneath, where it had ended its onward career by stopping up +against another house. As I looked from the back porch I saw that the +ground still continued to slope, so that if my house had not found in +its path another building, it would probably have proceeded somewhat +farther on its course. It was lighter, and I saw bushes and fences and +outbuildings--I was in a back yard. + +Almost breathless with amazement and consternation, I ran again to the +front door. When I reached it I found a young woman standing on the +porch of the house before me. I was about to say something--I know not +what--when she put her finger on her lips and stepped forward. + +"Please don't speak loudly," she said. "I am afraid it will frighten +mother. She is asleep yet. I suppose you and your house have been +sliding downhill?" + +"That is what has happened," said I. "But I cannot understand it. It +seems to me the most amazing thing that ever took place on the face of +the earth." + +"It is very queer," said she, "but hurricanes do blow away houses, and +that must have been a hurricane we had last night, for the wind was +strong enough to loosen any house. I have often wondered if that house +would ever slide downhill." + +"My house?" + +"Yes," she said. "Soon after it was built I began to think what a nice +clean sweep it could make from the place where it seemed to be stuck to +the side of the mountain, right down here into the valley." + +I could not talk with a girl like this; at least, I could not meet her +on her own conversational grounds. I was so agitated myself that it +seemed unnatural that any one to whom I should speak should not also be +agitated. + +"Who are you?" I asked rather brusquely. "At least, to whom does this +house belong?" + +"This is my mother's house," said she. "My mother is Mrs. Carson. We +happen just now to be living here by ourselves, so I cannot call on any +man to help you do anything. My brother has always lived with us, but +last week he went away." + +"You don't seem to be a bit astonished at what has happened," said I. + +She was rather a pretty girl, of a cheerful disposition, I should say, +for several times she had smiled as she spoke. + +"Oh, I am astonished," she answered; "or, at least, I was. But I have +had time enough to get over some of it. It was at least an hour ago +when I was awakened by hearing something crack in the yard. I went to +a window and looked out, and could just barely see that something like +a big building had grown up during the night. Then I watched it, and +watched it, until I made out it was a whole house; and after that it +was not long before I guessed what had happened. It seemed a simpler +thing to me, you know, than it did to you, because I had often thought +about it, and probably you never had." + +"You are right there," said I, earnestly. "It would have been +impossible for me to imagine such a thing." + +"At first I thought there was nobody in the house," said she, "but when +I heard some one moving about, I came down to tell whoever had arrived +not to make a noise. I see," she added, with another of her smiles, +"that you think I am a very strange person not to be more flurried by +what has happened. But really I cannot think of anything else just +now, except what mother will say and do when she comes down and finds +you and your house here at the back door. I am very sure she will not +like it." + +"Like it!" I exclaimed. "Who on earth could like it?" + +"Please speak more gently," she said. "Mother is always a little +irritable when her night's rest has been broken, and I would not like +to have her wakened up suddenly now. But really, Mr. Warren, I haven't +the least idea in the world how she will take this thing. I must go in +and be with her when she wakes, so that I can explain just what has +happened." + +"One moment," I said. "You know my name." + +"Of course I know your name," she answered. "Could that house be up +there on the hillside for more than a year without my knowing who lived +in it?" With this she went indoors. + +I could not help smiling when I thought of the young lady regretting +that there was no man in the house who might help me do something. +What could anybody do in a case like this? I turned and went into my +house. I entered the various rooms on the lower floor, and saw no +signs of any particular damage, except that everything movable in each +room was jumbled together against the front wall. But when I looked +out of the back door I found that the porch there was a good deal +wrecked, which I had not noticed before. + +I went up-stairs, and found everything very much as it was below. +Nothing seemed to have been injured except the chimney and the porches. +I thanked my stars that I had used hard wood instead of mortar for the +ceilings of my rooms. + +I was about to go into my bedroom, when I heard a woman scream, and of +course I hurried to the front. There on the back porch of her house +stood Mrs. Carson. She was a woman of middle age, and, as I glanced at +her, I saw where her daughter got her good looks. But the placidity +and cheerfulness of the younger face were entirely wanting in the +mother. Her eyes sparkled, her cheeks were red, her mouth was partly +opened, and it seemed to me that I could almost see that her breath was +hot. + +"Is this your house?" she cried, the moment her eyes fell upon me. +"And what is it doing here?" I did not immediately answer, I looked at +the angry woman, and behind her I saw, through the open door, the +daughter crossing the hallway. It was plain that she had decided to +let me have it out with her mother without interference. As briefly +and as clearly as I could, I explained what had happened. + +"What is all that to me?" she screamed. "It doesn't matter to me how +your house got here. There have been storms ever since the beginning +of the world, and I never heard of any of them taking a house into a +person's back yard. You ought not to have built your house where any +such thing could happen. But all this is nothing to me. I don't +understand now how your house did get here, and I don't want to +understand it. All I want is for you to take it away." + +"I will do that, madam, just as soon as I can. You may be very sure I +will do that. But--" + +"Can you do it now?" she asked. "Can you do it to-day? I don't want a +minute lost. I have not been outside to see what damage has been done, +but the first thing to do is to take your house away." + +"I am going to the town now, madam, to summon assistance." + +Mrs. Carson made no answer, but she turned and walked to the end of her +porch. There she suddenly gave a scream which quickly brought her +daughter from the house. "Kitty! Kitty!" cried her mother. "Do you +know what he has done? He has gone right over my round flower-garden. +His house is sitting on it this minute!" + +"But he could not help it, mother," said Kitty. + +"Help it!" exclaimed Mrs. Carson. "I didn't expect him to help it. +What I want--" Suddenly she stopped. Her eyes flashed brighter, her +mouth opened wider, and she became more and more excited as she noticed +the absence of the sheds, fences, or vegetable-beds which had found +themselves in the course of my all-destroying dwelling. + +It was now well on in the morning, and some of the neighbors had become +aware of the strange disaster which had happened to me, although if +they had heard the news from Mrs. Carson they might have supposed that +it was a disaster which had happened only to her. As they gazed at the +two houses so closely jammed together, all of them wondered, some of +them even laughed, but not one offered a suggestion which afforded +satisfaction to Mrs. Carson or myself. The general opinion was that, +now my house was there, it would have to stay there, for there were not +enough horses in the State to pull it back up that mountainside. To be +sure, it might possibly be drawn off sidewise. But whether it was +moved one way or the other, a lot of Mrs. Carson's trees would have to +be cut down to let it pass. + +"Which shall never happen!" cried that good lady. "If nothing else can +be done, it must be taken apart and hauled off in carts. But no matter +how it is managed, it must be moved, and that immediately." Miss +Carson now prevailed upon her mother to go into the house, and I stayed +and talked to the men and a few women who had gathered outside. + +When they had said all they had to say, and seen all there was to see, +these people went home to their breakfasts. I entered my house, but +not by the front door, for to do that I would have been obliged to +trespass upon Mrs. Carson's back porch. I got my hat, and was about to +start for the town, when I heard my name called. Turning into the +hall, I saw Miss Carson, who was standing at my front door. + +"Mr. Warren," said she, "you haven't any way of getting breakfast, have +you?" + +"Oh, no," said I. "My servants are up there in their cabin, and I +suppose they are too much scared to come down. But I am going to town +to see what can be done about my house, and will get my breakfast +there." + +"It's a long way to go without anything to eat," she said, "and we can +give you some breakfast. But I want to ask you something. I am in a +good deal of perplexity. Our two servants are out at the front of the +house, but they positively refuse to come in; they are afraid that your +house may begin sliding again and crush them all, so, I shall have to +get breakfast. But what bothers me is trying to find our well. I have +been outside, and can see no signs of it." + +"Where was your well?" I gasped. + +"It ought to be somewhere near the back of your house," she said. "May +I go through your hall and look out?" + +"Of course you may," I cried, and I preceded her to my back door. + +"Now, it seems to me," she said, after surveying the scene of +desolation immediately before, and looking from side to side toward +objects which had remained untouched, "that your house has passed +directly over our well, and must have carried away the little shed and +the pump and everything above ground. I should not wonder a bit," she +continued slowly, "if it is under your porch." + +I jumped to the ground, for the steps were shattered, and began to +search for the well, and it was not long before I discovered its round +dark opening, which was, as Miss Carson had imagined, under one end of +my porch. + +"What can we do?" she asked. "We can't have breakfast or get along at +all without water." It was a terribly depressing thing to me to think +that I, or rather my house, had given these people so much trouble. +But I speedily, assured Miss Carson that if she could find a bucket and +a rope which I could lower into the well, I would provide her with +water. + +She went into her house to see what she could find, and I tore away the +broken planks of the porch, so that I could get to the well. And then, +when she came with a tin pail and a clothes-line, I went to work to +haul up water and carry it to her back door. + +"I don't want mother to find out what has happened to the well," she +said, "for she has enough on her mind already." + +Mrs. Carson was a woman with some good points in her character. After +a time she called to me herself, and told me to come in to breakfast. +But during the meal she talked very earnestly to me about the amazing +trespass I had committed, and about the means which should be taken to +repair the damages my house had done to her property. I was as +optimistic as I could be, and the young lady spoke very cheerfully and +hopefully about the affair, so that we were beginning to get along +somewhat pleasantly, when, suddenly, Mrs. Carson sprang to her feet. +"Heavens and earth!" she cried, "this house is moving!" + +She was not mistaken. I had felt beneath my feet a sudden sharp +shock--not severe, but unmistakable. I remembered that both houses +stood upon slightly sloping ground. My blood turned cold, my heart +stood still; even Miss Carson was pale. + +When we had rushed out of doors to see what had happened, or what was +going to happen, I soon found that we had been needlessly frightened. +Some of the broken timbers on which my house had been partially resting +had given way, and the front part of the building had slightly +descended, jarring as it did so the other house against which it +rested. I endeavored to prove to Mrs. Carson that the result was +encouraging rather than otherwise, for my house was now more firmly +settled than it had been. But she did not value the opinion of a man +who did not know enough to put his house in a place where it would be +likely to stay, and she could eat no more breakfast, and was even +afraid to stay under her own roof until experienced mechanics had been +summoned to look into the state of affairs. + +I hurried away to the town, and it was not long before several +carpenters and masons were on the spot. After a thorough examination, +they assured Mrs. Carson that there was no danger, that my house would +do no farther damage to her premises, but, to make things certain, they +would bring some heavy beams and brace the front of my house against +her cellar wall. When that should be done it would be impossible for +it to move any farther. + +"But I don't want it braced!" cried Mrs. Carson. "I want it taken +away. I want it out of my back yard!" + +The master carpenter was a man of imagination and expedients. "That is +quite another thing, ma'am," said he. "We'll fix this gentleman's +house so that you needn't be afraid of it, and then, when the time +comes to move it, there's several ways of doing that. We might rig up +a powerful windlass at the top of the hill, and perhaps get a +steam-engine to turn it, and we could fasten cables to the house and +haul her back to where she belongs." + +"And can you take your oaths," cried Mrs. Carson, "that those ropes +won't break, and when that house gets half-way up the hill it won't +come sliding down ten times faster than it did, and crash into me and +mine and everything I own on earth? No, sir! I'll have no house +hauled up a hill back of me!" + +"Of course," said the carpenter, "it would be a great deal easier to +move it on this ground, which is almost level--" + +"And cut down my trees to do it! No, sir!" + +"Well, then," said he, "there is no way to do but to take it apart and +haul it off." + +"Which would make an awful time at the back of my house while you were +doing it!" exclaimed Mrs. Carson. + +I now put in a word. "There's only one thing to do that I can see!" I +exclaimed. "I will sell it to a match factory. It is almost all wood, +and it can be cut up in sections about two inches thick, and then split +into matches." + +Kitty smiled. "I should like to see them," she said, "taking away the +little sticks in wheelbarrows!" + +"There is no need of trifling on the subject," said Mrs. Carson. "I +have had a great deal to bear, and I must bear it no longer than is +necessary. I have just found out that in order to get water out of my +own well, I must go to the back porch of a stranger. Such things +cannot be endured. If my son George were here, he would tell me what I +ought to do. I shall write to him, and see what he advises. I do not +mind waiting a little bit, now that I know that you can fix Mr. +Warren's house so that it won't move any farther." + +Thus the matter was left. My house was braced that afternoon, and +toward evening I started to go to a hotel in the town to spend the +night. + +"No, sir!" said Mrs. Carson. "Do you suppose that I am going to stay +here all night with a great empty house jammed up against me, and +everybody knowing that it is empty? It will be the same as having +thieves in my own house to have them in yours. You have come down here +in your property, and you can stay in it and take care of it!" + +"I don't object to that in the least," I said. "My two women are here, +and I can tell them to attend to my meals. I haven't any chimney, but +I suppose they can make a fire some way or other." + +"No, sir!" said Mrs. Carson. "I am not going to have any strange +servants on my place. I have just been able to prevail upon my own +women to go into the house, and I don't want any more trouble. I have +had enough already!" + +"But, my dear madam," said I, "you don't want me to go to the town, and +you won't allow me to have any cooking done here. What am I to do?" + +"Well," she said, "you can eat with us. It may be two or three days +before I can hear from my son George, and in the meantime you can lodge +in your own house and I will take you to board. That is the best way I +can see of managing the thing. But I am very sure I am not going to be +left here alone in the dreadful predicament in which you have put me." + +We had scarcely finished supper when Jack Brandiger came to see me. He +laughed a good deal a about my sudden change of base, but thought, on +the whole, my house had made a very successful move. It must be more +pleasant in the valley than up on that windy hill. Jack was very much +interested in everything, and when Mrs. Carson and her daughter +appeared, as we were walking about viewing the scene, I felt myself +obliged to introduce him. + +"I like those ladies," said he to me, afterwards. "I think you have +chosen very agreeable neighbors." + +"How do you know you like them?" said I. "You had scarcely anything to +say to Mrs. Carson." + +"No, to be sure," said he. "But I expect I should like her. By the +way, do you know how you used to talk to me about coming and living +somewhere near you? How would you like me to take one of your rooms +now? I might cheer you up." + +"No," said I, firmly. "That cannot be done. As things are now, I have +as much as I can do to get along here by myself." + +Mrs. Carson did not hear from her son for nearly a week, and then he +wrote that he found it almost impossible to give her any advice. He +thought it was a very queer state of affairs. He had never heard of +anything like it. But he would try and arrange his business so that he +could come home in a week or two and look into matters. + +As I was thus compelled to force myself upon the close neighborhood of +Mrs. Carson and her daughter, I endeavored to make things as pleasant +as possible. I brought some of my men down out of the vineyard, and +set them to repairing fences, putting the garden in order, and doing +all that I could to remedy the doleful condition of things which I had +unwillingly brought into the back yard of this quiet family. I rigged +up a pump on my back porch by which the water of the well could be +conveniently obtained, and in every way endeavored to repair damages. + +But Mrs. Carson never ceased to talk about the unparalleled disaster +which had come upon her, and she must have had a great deal of +correspondence with her son George, because she gave me frequent +messages from him. He could not come on to look into the state of +affairs, but he seemed to be giving it a great deal of thought and +attention. + +Spring weather had come again, and it was very pleasant to help the +Carson ladies get their flower-garden in order--at least, as much as +was left of it, for my house was resting upon some of the most +important beds. As I was obliged to give up all present idea of doing +anything in the way of getting my residence out of a place where it had +no business to be, because Mrs. Carson would not consent to any plan +which had been suggested, I felt that I was offering some little +compensation in beautifying what seemed to be, at that time, my own +grounds. + +My labors in regard to vines, bushes, and all that sort of thing were +generally carried on under direction of Mrs. Carson or her daughter, +and as the elderly lady was a very busy housewife, the horticultural +work was generally left to Miss Kitty and me. + +I liked Miss Kitty. She was a cheerful, whole-souled person, and I +sometimes thought that she was not so unwilling to have me for a +neighbor as the rest of the family seemed to be; for if I were to judge +the disposition of her brother George from what her mother told me +about his letters, both he and Mrs. Carson must be making a great many +plans to get me off the premises. + +Nearly a month had now passed since my house and I made that remarkable +morning call upon Mrs. Carson. I was becoming accustomed to my present +mode of living, and, so far as I was concerned, it satisfied me very +well. I certainly lived a great deal better than when I was depending +upon my old negro cook. Miss Kitty seemed to be satisfied with things +as they were, and so, in some respects, did her mother. But the latter +never ceased to give me extracts from some of her son George's letters, +and this was always annoying and worrying to me. Evidently he was not +pleased with me as such a close neighbor to his mother, and it was +astonishing how many expedients he proposed in order to rid her of my +undesirable proximity. + +"My son George," said Mrs. Carson, one morning, "has been writing to me +about jack-screws. He says that the greatest improvements have been +made in jack-screws." + +"What do you do with them, mother?" asked Miss Kitty. + +"You lift houses with them," said she. "He says that in large cities +they lift whole blocks of houses with them and build stories +underneath. He thinks that we can get rid of our trouble here if we +use jack-screws." + +"But how does he propose to use them?" I asked. + +"Oh, he has a good many plans," answered Mrs. Carson. "He said that he +should not wonder if jack-screws could be made large enough to lift +your house entirely over mine and set it out in the road, where it +could be carried away without interfering with anything, except, of +course, vehicles which might be coming along. But he has another +plan--that is, to lift my house up and carry it out into the field on +the other side of the road, and then your house might be carried along +right over the cellar until it got to the road. In that way, he says, +the bushes and trees would not have to be interfered with." + +"I think brother George is cracked!" said Kitty. + +All this sort of thing worried me very much. My mind was eminently +disposed toward peace and tranquillity, but who could be peaceful and +tranquil with a prospective jack-screw under the very base of his +comfort and happiness? In fact, my house had never been such a happy +home as it was at that time. The fact of its unwarranted position upon +other people's grounds had ceased to trouble me. + +But the coming son George, with his jack-screws, did trouble me very +much, and that afternoon I deliberately went into Mrs. Carson's house +to look for Kitty. I knew her mother was not at home, for I had seen +her go out. When Kitty appeared I asked her to come out on her back +porch. "Have you thought of any new plan of moving it?" she said, with +a smile, as we sat down. + +"No," said I, earnestly. "I have not, and I don't want to think of any +plan of moving it. I am tired of seeing it here, I am tired of +thinking about moving it away, and I am tired of hearing people talk +about moving it. I have not any right to be here, and I am never +allowed to forget it. What I want to do is to go entirely away, and +leave everything behind me--except one thing." + +"And what is that?" asked Kitty. + +"You," I answered. + +She turned a little pale and did not reply. + +"You understand me, Kitty," I said. "There is nothing in the world +that I care for but you. What have you to say to me?" + +Then came back to her her little smile. "I think it would be very +foolish for us to go away," she said. + +It was about a quarter of an hour after this when Kitty proposed that +we should go out to the front of the house; it would look queer if any +of the servants should come by and see us sitting together like that. +I had forgotten that there were other people in the world, but I went +with her. + +We were standing on the front porch, close to each other, and I think +we were holding each other's hands, when Mrs. Carson came back. As she +approached she looked at us inquiringly, plainly wishing to know why we +were standing side by side before her door as if we had some special +object in so doing. + +"Well?" said she, as she came up the steps. Of course it was right +that I should speak, and, in as few words as possible, I told her what +Kitty and I had been saying to each other. I never saw Kitty's mother +look so cheerful and so handsome as when she came forward and kissed +her daughter and shook hands with me. She seemed so perfectly +satisfied that it amazed me. After a little Kitty left us, and then +Mrs. Carson asked me to sit by her on a rustic bench. + +"Now," said she, "this will straighten out things in the very best way. +When you are married, you and Kitty can live in the back +building,--for, of course, your house will now be the same thing as a +back building,--and you can have the second floor. We won't have any +separate tables, because it will be a great deal nicer for you and +Kitty to live with me, and it will simply be your paying board for two +persons instead of one. And you know you can manage your vineyard just +as well from the bottom of the hill as from the top. The lower rooms +of what used to be your house can be made very pleasant and comfortable +for all of us. I have been thinking about the room on the right that +you had planned for a parlor, and it will make a lovely sitting-room +for us, which is a thing we have never had, and the room on the other +side is just what will suit beautifully for a guest-chamber. The two +houses together, with the roof of my back porch properly joined to the +front of your house, will make a beautiful and spacious dwelling. It +was fortunate, too, that you painted your house a light yellow. I have +often looked at the two together, and thought what a good thing it was +that one was not one color and the other another. As to the pump, it +will be very easy now to put a pipe from what used to be your back +porch to our kitchen, so that we can get water without being obliged to +carry it. Between us we can make all sorts of improvements, and some +time I will tell you of a good many that I have thought of. + +"What used to be your house," she continued, "can be jack-screwed up a +little bit and a good foundation put under it. I have inquired about +that. Of course it would not have been proper to let you know that I +was satisfied with the state of things, but I was satisfied, and there +is no use of denying it. As soon as I got over my first scare after +that house came down the hill, and had seen how everything might be +arranged to suit all parties, I said to myself, `What the Lord has +joined together, let not man put asunder,' and so, according to my +belief, the strongest kind of jack-screws could not put these two +houses asunder, any more than they could put you and Kitty asunder, now +that you have agreed to take each other for each other's own." + +Jack Brandiger came to call that evening, and when he had heard what +had happened he whistled a good deal. "You are a funny kind of a +fellow," said he. "You go courting like a snail, with your house on +your back!" + +I think my friend was a little discomfited. "Don't be discouraged, +Jack," said I. "You will get a good wife some of these days--that is, +if you don't try to slide uphill to find her!" + + + + +OUR ARCHERY CLUB + +When an archery club was formed in our village, I was among the first +to join it. But I should not, on this account, claim any extraordinary +enthusiasm on the subject of archery, for nearly all the ladies and +gentlemen of the place were also among the first to join. + +Few of us, I think, had a correct idea of the popularity of archery in +our midst until the subject of a club was broached. Then we all +perceived what a strong interest we felt in the study and use of the +bow and arrow. The club was formed immediately, and our thirty members +began to discuss the relative merits of lancewood, yew, and greenheart +bows, and to survey yards and lawns for suitable spots for setting up +targets for home practice. + +Our weekly meetings, at which we came together to show in friendly +contest how much our home practice had taught us, were held upon the +village green, or rather upon what had been intended to be the village +green. This pretty piece of ground, partly in smooth lawn and partly +shaded by fine trees, was the property of a gentleman of the place, who +had presented it, under certain conditions, to the township. But as +the township had never fulfilled any of the conditions, and had done +nothing toward the improvement of the spot, further than to make it a +grazing-place for local cows and goats, the owner had withdrawn his +gift, shut out the cows and goats by a picket fence, and, having locked +the gate, had hung up the key in his barn. When our club was formed, +the green, as it was still called, was offered to us for our meetings, +and, with proper gratitude, we elected its owner to be our president. + +This gentleman was eminently qualified for the presidency of an archery +club. In the first place, he did not shoot: this gave him time and +opportunity to attend to the shooting of others. He was a tall and +pleasant man, a little elderly. This "elderliness," if I may so put +it, seemed, in his case, to resemble some mild disorder, like a gentle +rheumatism, which, while it prevented him from indulging in all the +wild hilarities of youth, gave him, in compensation, a position, as one +entitled to a certain consideration, which was very agreeable to him. +His little disease was chronic, it is true, and it was growing upon +him; but it was, so far, a pleasant ailment. + +And so, with as much interest in bows and arrows and targets and +successful shots as any of us, he never fitted an arrow to a string, +nor drew a bow. But he attended every meeting, settling disputed +points (for he studied all the books on archery), encouraging the +disheartened, holding back the eager ones who would run to the targets +as soon as they had shot, regardless of the fact that others were still +shooting and that the human body is not arrow-proof, and shedding about +him that general aid and comfort which emanates from a good fellow, no +matter what he may say or do. + +There were persons--outsiders--who said that archery clubs always +selected ladies for their presiding officers, but we did not care to be +too much bound down and trammelled by customs and traditions. Another +club might not have among its members such a genial elderly gentleman +who owned a village green. + +I soon found myself greatly interested in archery, especially when I +succeeded in planting an arrow somewhere within the periphery of the +target, but I never became such an enthusiast in bow-shooting as my +friend Pepton. + +If Pepton could have arranged matters to suit himself, he would have +been born an archer. But as this did not happen to have been the case, +he employed every means in his power to rectify what he considered this +serious error in his construction. He gave his whole soul, and the +greater part of his spare time, to archery, and as he was a young man +of energy, this helped him along wonderfully. + +His equipments were perfect. No one could excel him in, this respect. +His bow was snakewood, backed with hickory. He carefully rubbed it +down every evening with oil and beeswax, and it took its repose in a +green baize bag. His arrows were Philip Highfield's best, his strings +the finest Flanders hemp. He had shooting-gloves, and little leather +tips that could be screwed fast on the ends of what he called his +string-fingers. He had a quiver and a belt, and when equipped for the +weekly meetings, he carried a fancy-colored wiping-tassel, and a little +ebony grease-pot hanging from his belt. He wore, when shooting, a +polished arm-guard or bracer, and if he had heard of anything else that +an archer should have, he straightway would have procured it. + +Pepton was a single man, and he lived with two good old maiden ladies, +who took as much care of him as if they had been his mothers. And he +was such a good, kind fellow that he deserved all the attention they +gave him. They felt a great interest in his archery pursuits, and +shared his anxious solicitude in the selection of a suitable place to +hang his bow. + +"You see," said he, "a fine bow like this, when not in use, should +always be in a perfectly dry place." + +"And when in use, too," said Miss Martha, "for I am sure that you +oughtn't to be standing and shooting in any damp spot. There's no +surer way of gettin' chilled." + +To which sentiment Miss Maria agreed, and suggested wearing rubber +shoes, or having a board to stand on, when the club met after a rain. + +Pepton first hung his bow in the hall, but after he had arranged it +symmetrically upon two long nails (bound with green worsted, lest they +should scratch the bow through its woollen cover), he reflected that +the front door would frequently be open, and that damp drafts must +often go through the hall. He was sorry to give up this place for his +bow, for it was convenient and appropriate, and for an instant he +thought that it might remain, if the front door could be kept shut, and +visitors admitted through a little side door which the family generally +used, and which was almost as convenient as the other--except, indeed, +on wash-days, when a wet sheet or some article of wearing apparel was +apt to be hung in front of it. But although wash-day occurred but once +a week, and although it was comparatively easy, after a little +practice, to bob under a high-propped sheet, Pepton's heart was too +kind to allow his mind to dwell upon this plan. So he drew the nails +from the wall of the hall, and put them up in various places about the +house. His own room had to be aired a great deal in all weathers, and +so that would not do at all. The wall above the kitchen fireplace +would be a good location, for the chimney was nearly always warm. But +Pepton could not bring himself to keep his bow in the kitchen. There +would be nothing esthetic about such a disposition of it, and, besides, +the girl might be tempted to string and bend it. The old ladies really +did not want it in the parlor, for its length and its green baize cover +would make it an encroaching and unbecoming neighbor to the little +engravings and the big samplers, the picture-frames of acorns and +pine-cones, the fancifully patterned ornaments of clean wheat straw, +and all the quaint adornments which had hung upon those walls for so +many years. But they did not say so. If it had been necessary, to +make room for the bow, they would have taken down the pencilled +profiles of their grandfather, their grandmother, and their father when +a little boy, which hung in a row over the mantelpiece. + +However, Pepton did not ask this sacrifice. In the summer evenings the +parlor windows must be open. The dining-room was really very little +used in the evening, except when Miss Maria had stockings to darn, and +then she always sat in that apartment, and of course she had the +windows open. But Miss Maria was very willing to bring her work into +the parlor,--it was foolish, anyway, to have a feeling about darning +stockings before chance company,--and then the dining-room could be +kept shut up after tea. So into the wall of that neat little room +Pepton drove his worsted-covered nails, and on them carefully laid his +bow. All the next day Miss Martha and Miss Maria went about the house, +covering the nail-holes he had made with bits of wallpaper, carefully +snipped out to fit the patterns, and pasted on so neatly that no one +would have suspected they were there. + +One afternoon, as I was passing the old ladies' house, saw, or thought +I saw, two men carrying in a coffin. I was struck with alarm. + +"What!" I thought. "Can either of those good women-- Or can Pepton--" + +Without a moment's hesitation, I rushed in behind the men. There, at +the foot of the stairs, directing them, stood Pepton. Then it was not +he! I seized him sympathetically by the hand. + +"Which?" I faltered. "Which? Who is that coffin for?" + +"Coffin!" cried Pepton. "Why, my dear fellow, that is not a coffin. +That is my ascham." + +"Ascham?" I exclaimed. "What is that?" + +"Come and look at it," he said, when the men had set it on end against +the wall. "It is an upright closet or receptacle for an archer's +armament. Here is a place to stand the bow, here are supports for the +arrows and quivers, here are shelves and hooks, on which to lay or hang +everything the merry man can need. You see, moreover, that it is lined +with green plush, that the door fits tightly, so that it can stand +anywhere, and there need be no fear of drafts or dampness affecting my +bow. Isn't it a perfect thing? You ought to get one." + +I admitted the perfection, but agreed no further. I had not the income +of my good Pepton. + +Pepton was, indeed, most wonderfully well equipped; and yet, little did +those dear old ladies think, when they carefully dusted and +reverentially gazed at the bunches of arrows, the arm-bracers, the +gloves, the grease-pots, and all the rest of the paraphernalia of +archery, as it hung around Pepton's room, or when they afterwards +allowed a particular friend to peep at it, all arranged so orderly +within the ascham, or when they looked with sympathetic, loving +admiration on the beautiful polished bow, when it was taken out of its +bag--little did they think, I say, that Pepton was the very poorest +shot in the club. In all the surface of the much-perforated targets of +the club, there was scarcely a hole that he could put his hand upon his +heart and say he made. + +Indeed, I think it was the truth that Pepton was born not to be an +archer. There were young fellows in the club who shot with bows that +cost no more than Pepton's tassels, but who could stand up and whang +arrows into the targets all the afternoon, if they could get a chance; +and there were ladies who made hits five times out of six; and there +were also all the grades of archers common to any club. But there was +no one but himself in Pepton's grade. He stood alone, and it was never +any trouble to add up his score. + +Yet he was not discouraged. He practised every day except Sundays, and +indeed he was the only person in the club who practised at night. When +he told me about this, I was a little surprised. + +"Why, it's easy enough," said he. "You see, I hung a lantern, with a +reflector, before the target, just a little to one side. It lighted up +the target beautifully, and I believe there was a better chance of +hitting it than by daylight, for the only thing you could see was the +target, and so your attention was not distracted. To be sure," he +said, in answer to a question, "it was a good deal of trouble to find +the arrows, but that I always have. When I get so expert that I can +put all the arrows into the target, there will be no trouble of the +kind, night or day. However," he continued, "I don't practise any more +by night. The other evening I sent an arrow slam-bang into the +lantern, and broke it all to flinders. Borrowed lantern, too. +Besides, I found it made Miss Martha very nervous to have me shooting +about the house after dark. She had a friend who had a little boy who +was hit in the leg by an arrow from a bow, which, she says, +accidentally went off in the night, of its own accord. She is +certainly a little mixed in her mind in regard to this matter, but I +wish to respect her feelings, and so shall not use another lantern." + +As I have said, there were many good archers among the ladies of our +club. Some of them, after we had been organized for a month or two, +made scores that few of the gentlemen could excel. But the lady who +attracted the greatest attention when she shot was Miss Rosa. + +When this very pretty young lady stood up before the ladies' +target--her left side well advanced, her bow firmly held out in her +strong left arm, which never quivered, her head a little bent to the +right, her arrow drawn back by three well-gloved fingers to the tip of +her little ear, her dark eyes steadily fixed upon the gold, and her +dress, well fitted over her fine and vigorous figure, falling in +graceful folds about her feet, we all stopped shooting to look at her. + +"There is something statuesque about her," said Pepton, who ardently +admired her, "and yet there isn't. A statue could never equal her +unless we knew there was a probability of movement in it. And the only +statues which have that are the Jarley wax-works, which she does not +resemble in the least. There is only one thing that that girl needs to +make her a perfect archer, and that is to be able to aim better." + +This was true. Miss Rosa did need to aim better. Her arrows had a +curious habit of going on all sides of the target, and it was very +seldom that one chanced to stick into it. For if she did make a hit, +we all knew it was chance and that there was no probability of her +doing it again. Once she put an arrow right into the centre of the +gold,--one of the finest shots ever made on the ground,--but she didn't +hit the target again for two weeks. She was almost as bad a shot as +Pepton, and that is saying a good deal. + +One evening I was sitting with Pepton on the little front porch of the +old ladies' house, where we were taking our after-dinner smoke while +Miss Martha and Miss Maria were washing, with their own white hands, +the china and glass in which they took so much pride. I often used to +go over and spend an hour with Pepton. He liked to have some one to +whom he could talk on the subjects which filled his soul, and I liked +to hear him talk. + +"I tell you," said he, as he leaned back in his chair, with his feet +carefully disposed on the railing so that they would not injure Miss +Maria's Madeira-vine, "I tell you, sir, that there are two things I +crave with all my power of craving--two goals I fain would reach, two +diadems I would wear upon my brow. One of these is to kill an +eagle--or some large bird--with a shaft from my good bow. I would then +have it stuffed and mounted, with the very arrow that killed it still +sticking in its breast. This trophy of my skill I would have fastened +against the wall of my room or my hall, and I would feel proud to think +that my grandchildren could point to that bird--which I would carefully +bequeath to my descendants--and say, `My grand'ther shot that bird, and +with that very arrow.' Would it not stir your pulses if you could do a +thing like that?" + +"I should have to stir them up a good deal before I could do it," I +replied. "It would be a hard thing to shoot an eagle with an arrow. +If you want a stuffed bird to bequeath, you'd better use a rifle." + +"A rifle!" exclaimed Pepton. "There would be no glory in that. There +are lots of birds shot with rifles--eagles, hawks, wild geese, +tomtits--" + +"Oh, no!" I interrupted, "not tomtits." + +"Well, perhaps they are too little for a rifle," said he. "But what I +mean to say is that I wouldn't care at all for an eagle I had shot with +a rifle. You couldn't show the ball that killed him. If it were put +in properly, it would be inside, where it couldn't be seen. No, sir. +It is ever so much more honorable, and far more difficult, too, to hit +an eagle than to hit a target." + +"That is very true," I answered, "especially in these days, when there +are so few eagles and so many targets. But what is your other diadem?" + +"That," said Pepton, "is to see Miss Rosa wear the badge." + +"Indeed!" said I. And from that moment I began to understand Pepton's +hopes in regard to the grandmother of those children who should point +to the eagle. + +"Yes, sir," he continued, "I should be truly happy to see her win the +badge. And she ought to win it. No one shoots more correctly, and +with a better understanding of all the rules, than she does. There +must truly be something the matter with her aiming. I've half a mind +to coach her a little." + +I turned aside to see who was coming down the road. I would not have +had him know I smiled. + +The most objectionable person in our club was O. J. Hollingsworth. He +was a good enough fellow in himself, but it was as an archer that we +objected to him. + +There was, so far as I know, scarcely a rule of archery that he did not +habitually violate. Our president and nearly all of us remonstrated +with him, and Pepton even went to see him on the subject, but it was +all to no purpose. With a quiet disregard of other people's ideas +about bow-shooting and other people's opinions about himself, he +persevered in a style of shooting which appeared absolutely absurd to +any one who knew anything of the rules and methods of archery. + +I used to like to look at him when his turn came around to shoot. He +was not such a pleasing object of vision as Miss Rosa, but his style +was so entirely novel to me that it was interesting. He held the bow +horizontally, instead of perpendicularly, like other archers, and he +held it well down--about opposite his waistband. He did not draw his +arrow back to his ear, but he drew it back to the lower button of his +vest. Instead of standing upright, with his left side to the target, +he faced it full, and leaned forward over his arrow, in an attitude +which reminded me of a Roman soldier about to fall upon his sword. +When he had seized the nock of his arrow between his finger and thumb, +he languidly glanced at the target, raised his bow a little, and let +fly. The provoking thing about it was that he nearly always hit. If +he had only known how to stand, and hold his bow, and draw back his +arrow, he would have been a very good archer. But, as it was, we could +not help laughing at him, although our president always discountenanced +anything of the kind. + +Our champion was a tall man, very cool and steady, who went to work at +archery exactly as if he were paid a salary, and intended to earn his +money honestly. He did the best he could in every way. He generally +shot with one of the bows owned by the club, but if any one on the +ground had a better one, he would borrow it. He used to shoot +sometimes with Pepton's bow, which he declared to be a most capital +one. But as Pepton was always very nervous when he saw his bow in the +hands of another than himself, the champion soon ceased to borrow it. + +There were two badges, one of green silk and gold for the ladies, and +one of green and red for the gentlemen, and these were shot for at each +weekly meeting. With the exception of a few times when the club was +first formed, the champion had always worn the gentlemen's badge. Many +of us tried hard to win it from him, but we never could succeed; he +shot too well. + +On the morning of one of our meeting days, the champion told me, as I +was going to the city with him, that he would not be able to return at +his usual hour that afternoon. He would be very busy, and would have +to wait for the six-fifteen train, which would bring him home too late +for the archery meeting. So he gave me the badge, asking me to hand it +to the president, that he might bestow it on the successful competitor +that afternoon. + +We were all rather glad that the champion was obliged to be absent. +Here was a chance for some one of us to win the badge. It was not, +indeed, an opportunity for us to win a great deal of honor, for if the +champion were to be there we should have no chance at all. But we were +satisfied with this much, having no reason--in the present, at +least--to expect anything more. + +So we went to the targets with a new zeal, and most of us shot better +than we had ever shot before. In this number was O. J. Hollingsworth. +He excelled himself, and, what was worse, he excelled all the rest of +us. He actually made a score of eighty-five in twenty-four shots, +which at that time was remarkably good shooting, for our club. This +was dreadful! To have a fellow who didn't know how to shoot beat us +all was too bad. If any visitor who knew anything at all of archery +should see that the member who wore the champion's badge was a man who +held his bow as if he had the stomach-ache, it would ruin our character +as a club. It was not to be borne. + +Pepton in particular felt greatly outraged. We had met very promptly +that afternoon, and had finished our regular shooting much earlier than +usual; and now a knot of us were gathered together, talking over this +unfortunate occurrence. + +"I don't intend to stand it," Pepton suddenly exclaimed. "I feel it as +a personal disgrace. I'm going to have the champion here before dark. +By the rules, he has a right to shoot until the president declares it +is too late. Some of you fellows stay here, and I'll bring him." + +And away he ran, first giving me charge of his precious bow. There was +no need of his asking us to stay. We were bound to see the fun out, +and to fill up the time our president offered a special prize of a +handsome bouquet from his gardens, to be shot for by the ladies. + +Pepton ran to the railroad station, and telegraphed to the champion. +This was his message: + + +"You are absolutely needed here. If possible, take the five-thirty +train for Ackford. I will drive over for you. Answer." + + +There was no train before the six-fifteen by which the champion could +come directly to our village; but Ackford, a small town about three +miles distant, was on another railroad, on which there were frequent +afternoon trains. + +The champion answered: + + +"All right. Meet me." + + +Then Pepton rushed to our livery stable, hired a horse and buggy, and +drove to Ackford. + +A little after half-past six, when several of us were beginning to +think that Pepton had failed in his plans, he drove rapidly into the +grounds, making a very short turn at the gate, and pulled up his +panting horse just in time to avoid running over three ladies, who were +seated on the grass. The champion was by his side! + +The latter lost no time in talking or salutations. He knew what he had +been brought there to do, and he immediately set about trying to do it. +He took Pepton's bow, which the latter urged upon him. He stood up, +straight and firm on the line, at thirty-five yards from the +gentlemen's target; he carefully selected his arrows, examining the +feathers and wiping away any bit of soil that might be adhering to the +points after some one had shot them into the turf; with vigorous arm he +drew each arrow to its head; he fixed his eyes and his whole mind on +the centre of the target; he shot his twenty-four arrows, handed to +him, one by one, by Pepton, and he made a score of ninety-one. + +The whole club had been scoring the shots, as they were made, and when +the last arrow plumped into the red ring, a cheer arose from every +member excepting three: the champion, the president, and O. J. +Hollingsworth. But Pepton cheered loudly enough to make up these +deficiencies. + +"What in the mischief did they cheer him for?" asked Hollingsworth of +me. "They didn't cheer me when I beat everybody on the grounds an hour +ago. And it's no new thing for him to win the badge; he does it every +time." + +"Well," said I, frankly, "I think the club, AS a club, objects to your +wearing the badge, because you don't know how to shoot." + +"Don't know how to shoot!" he cried. "Why, I can hit the target better +than any of you. Isn't that what you try to do when you shoot?" + +"Yes," said I, "of course that is what we try to do. But we try to do +it in the proper way." + +"Proper grandmother!" he exclaimed. "It doesn't seem to help you much. +The best thing you fellows can do is to learn to shoot my way, and then +perhaps you may be able to hit oftener." + +When the champion had finished shooting he went home to his dinner, but +many of us stood about, talking over our great escape. + +"I feel as if I had done that myself," said Pepton. "I am almost as +proud as if I had shot--well, not an eagle, but a soaring lark." + +"Why, that ought to make you prouder than the other," said I, "for a +lark, especially when it's soaring, must be a good deal harder to hit +than an eagle." + +"That's so," said Pepton, reflectively. "But I'll stick to the lark. +I'm proud." + +During the next month our style of archery improved very much, so much, +indeed, that we increased our distance, for gentlemen, to forty yards, +and that for ladies to thirty, and also had serious thoughts of +challenging the Ackford club to a match. But as this was generally +understood to be a crack club, we finally determined to defer our +challenge until the next season. + +When I say we improved, I do not mean all of us. I do not mean Miss +Rosa. Although her attitudes were as fine as ever, and every motion as +true to rule as ever, she seldom made a hit. Pepton actually did try +to teach her how to aim, but the various methods of pointing the arrow +which he suggested resulted in such wild shooting that the boys who +picked up the arrows never dared to stick the points of their noses +beyond their boarded barricade during Miss Rosa's turns at the target. +But she was not discouraged, and Pepton often assured her that if she +would keep up a good heart, and practise regularly, she would get the +badge yet. As a rule, Pepton was so honest and truthful that a little +statement of this kind, especially under the circumstances, might be +forgiven him. + +One day Pepton came to me and announced that he had made a discovery. + +"It's about archery," he said, "and I don't mind telling you, because I +know you will not go about telling everybody else, and also because I +want to see you succeed as an archer." + + "I am very much obliged," I said, "and what is the discovery?" + +"It's this," he answered. "When you draw your bow, bring the nock of +your arrow"--he was always very particular about technical terms--"well +up to your ear. Having done that, don't bother any more about your +right hand. It has nothing to do with the correct pointing of your +arrow, for it must be kept close to your right ear, just as if it were +screwed there. Then with your left hand bring around the bow so that +your fist--with the arrow-head, which is resting on top of it--shall +point, as nearly as you can make it, directly at the centre of the +target. Then let fly, and ten to one you'll make a hit. Now, what do +you think of that for a discovery? I've thoroughly tested the plan, +and it works splendidly." + +"I think," said I, "that you have discovered the way in which good +archers shoot. You have stated the correct method of managing a bow +and arrow." + +"Then you don't think it's an original method with me?" + +"Certainly not," I answered. + +"But it's the correct way?" + +"There's no doubt of that," said I. + +"Well," said Pepton, "then I shall make it my way." + +He did so, and the consequence was that one day, when the champion +happened to be away, Pepton won the badge. When the result was +announced, we were all surprised, but none so much so as Pepton +himself. He had been steadily improving since he had adopted a good +style of shooting, but he had had no idea that he would that day be +able to win the badge. + +When our president pinned the emblem of success upon the lapel of his +coat, Pepton turned pale, and then he flushed. He thanked the +president, and was about to thank the ladies and gentlemen; but +probably recollecting that we had had nothing to do with it,--unless, +indeed, we had shot badly on his behalf,--he refrained. He said +little, but I could see that he was very proud and very happy. There +was but one drawback to his triumph: + +Miss Rosa was not there. She was a very regular attendant, but for +some reason she was absent on this momentous afternoon. I did not say +anything to him on the subject, but I knew he felt this absence deeply. + +But this cloud could not wholly overshadow his happiness. He walked +home alone, his face beaming, his eyes sparkling, and his good bow +under his arm. + +That evening I called on him, for I thought that when he had cooled +down a little he would like to talk over the affair. But he was not +in. Miss Maria said that he had gone out as soon as he had finished +his dinner, which he had hurried through in a way which would certainly +injure his digestion if he kept up the practice; and dinner was late, +too, for they waited for him, and the archery meeting lasted a long +time today; and it really was not right for him to stay out after the +dew began to fall with only ordinary shoes on, for what's the good of +knowing how to shoot a bow and arrow, if you're laid up in your bed +with rheumatism or disease of the lungs? Good old lady! She would +have kept Pepton in a green baize bag, had such a thing been possible. + +The next morning, full two hours before church-time, Pepton called on +me. His face was still beaming. I could not help smiling. + +"Your happiness lasts well," I said. + +"Lasts!" he exclaimed. "Why shouldn't it last!" + +"There's no reason why it should not--at least, for a week," I said, +"and even longer, if you repeat your success." + +I did not feel so much like congratulating Pepton as I had on the +previous evening. I thought he was making too much of his +badge-winning. + +"Look here!" said Pepton, seating himself, and drawing his chair close +to me, "you are shooting wild--very wild indeed. You don't even see +the target. Let me tell you something. Last evening I went to see +Miss Rosa. She was delighted at my success. I had not expected this. +I thought she would be pleased, but not to such a degree. Her +congratulations were so warm that they set me on fire." + +"They must have been very warm indeed," I remarked. + +"`Miss Rosa,' said I," continued Pepton, without regarding my +interruption, "`it has been my fondest hope to see you wear the badge.' +`But I never could get it, you know,' she said. `You have got it,' I +exclaimed. `Take this. I won it for you. Make me happy by wearing +it.' `I can't do that,' she said. `That is a gentleman's badge.' +`Take it,' I cried, `gentleman and all!' + + "I can't tell you all that happened after that," continued +Pepton. "You know, it wouldn't do. It is enough to say that she wears +the badge. And we are both her own--the badge and I!" + +Now I congratulated him in good earnest. There was a reason for it. + +"I don't owe a snap now for shooting an eagle," said Pepton, springing +to his feet and striding up and down the floor. "Let 'em all fly free +for me. I have made the most glorious shot that man could make. I +have hit the gold--hit it fair in the very centre! And what's more, +I've knocked it clean out of the target! Nobody else can ever make +such a shot. The rest of you fellows will have to be content to hit +the red, the blue, the black, or the white. The gold is mine!" + +I called on the old ladies, some time after this, and found them alone. +They were generally alone in the evenings now. We talked about +Pepton's engagement, and I found them resigned. They were sorry to +lose him, but they wanted him to be happy. + +"We have always known," said Miss Martha, with a little sigh, "that we +must die, and that he must get married. But we don't intend to repine. +These things will come to people." And her little sigh was followed by +a smile, still smaller. + + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's The Magic Egg and Other Stories, by Frank Stockton + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MAGIC EGG AND OTHER STORIES *** + +***** This file should be named 429.txt or 429.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/4/2/429/ + + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, +set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to +copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to +protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. 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STOCKTON + + + + +CONTENTS + + +THE MAGIC EGG +"HIS WIFE'S DECEASED SISTER" +THE WIDOW'S CRUISE +CAPTAIN ELI'S BEST EAR +LOVE BEFORE BREAKFAST +THE STAYING POWER OF SIR ROHAN +A PIECE OF RED CALICO +THE CHRISTMAS WRECK +MY WELL AND WHAT CAME OUT OF IT +MR. TOLMAN +MY UNWILLING NEIGHBOR +OUR ARCHERY CLUB + + + + + THE MAGIC EGG + +The pretty little theatre attached to the building of the +Unicorn Club had been hired for a certain January afternoon by +Mr. Herbert Loring, who wished to give therein a somewhat novel +performance, to which he had invited a small audience consisting +entirely of friends and acquaintances. + +Loring was a handsome fellow about thirty years old, who had +travelled far and studied much. He had recently made a long +sojourn in the far East, and his friends had been invited to the +theatre to see some of the wonderful things he had brought from +that country of wonders. As Loring was a club-man, and belonged +to a family of good social standing, his circle of acquaintances +was large, and in this circle a good many unpleasant remarks had +been made regarding the proposed entertainment--made, of course, +by the people who had not been invited to be present. Some of +the gossip on the subject had reached Loring, who did not +hesitate to say that he could not talk to a crowd, and that he +did not care to show the curious things he had collected to +people who would not thoroughly appreciate them. He had been +very particular in regard to his invitations. + +At three o'clock on the appointed afternoon nearly all the +people who had been invited to the Unicorn Theatre were in their +seats. No one had stayed away except for some very good reason, +for it was well known that if Herbert Loring offered to show +anything it was worth seeing. + +About forty people were present, who sat talking to one +another, or admiring the decoration of the theatre. As Loring +stood upon the stage--where he was entirely alone, his exhibition +requiring no assistants--he gazed through a loophole in the +curtain upon a very interesting array of faces. There were the +faces of many men and women of society, of students, of workers +in various fields of thought, and even of idlers in all fields of +thought; but there was not one which indicated a frivolous or +listless disposition. The owners of those faces had come to see +something, and they wished to see it. + +For a quarter of an hour after the time announced for the +opening of the exhibition Loring peered through the hole in the +curtain, and then, although all the people he had expected had +not arrived, he felt it would not do for him to wait any longer. +The audience was composed of well-bred and courteous men and +women, but despite their polite self-restraint Loring could see +that some of them were getting tired of waiting. So, very +reluctantly, and feeling that further delay was impossible, he +raised the curtain and came forward on the stage. + + Briefly he announced that the exhibition would open with some +fireworks he had brought from Corea. It was plain to see that +the statement that fireworks were about to be set off on a +theatre stage, by an amateur, had rather startled some of the +audience, and Loring hastened to explain that these were not +real fireworks, but that they were contrivances made of colored +glass, which were illuminated by the powerful lens of a lantern +which was placed out of sight, and while the apparent pyrotechnic +display would resemble fireworks of strange and grotesque +designs, it would be absolutely without danger. He brought out +some little bunches of bits of colored glass, hung them at some +distance apart on a wire which was stretched across the stage +just high enough for him to reach it, and then lighted his +lantern, which he placed in one of the wings, lowered all the +lights in the theatre, and began his exhibition. + As Loring turned his lantern on one of the clusters of glass +lenses, strips, and points, and, unseen himself, caused them to +move by means of long cords attached, the effects were beautiful +and marvellous. Little wheels of colored fire rapidly revolved, +miniature rockets appeared to rise a few feet and to explode in +the air, and while all the ordinary forms of fireworks were +produced on a diminutive scale, there were some effects that were +entirely novel to the audience. As the light was turned +successively upon one and another of the clusters of glass, +sometimes it would flash along the whole line so rapidly that all +the various combinations of color and motion seemed to be +combined in one, and then for a time each particular set of +fireworks would blaze, sparkle, and coruscate by itself, +scattering particles of colored light as if they had been real +sparks of fire. + +This curious and beautiful exhibition of miniature +pyrotechnics was extremely interesting to the audience, who gazed +upward with rapt and eager attention at the line of wheels, +stars, and revolving spheres. So far as interest gave evidence +of satisfaction, there was never a better satisfied audience. At +first there had been some hushed murmurs of pleasure, but very +soon the attention of every one seemed so completely engrossed by +the dazzling display that they simply gazed in silence. + +For twenty minutes or longer the glittering show went on, and +not a sign of weariness or inattention was made by any one of the +assembled company. Then gradually the colors of the little +fireworks faded, the stars and wheels revolved more slowly, the +lights in the body of the theatre were gradually raised, and the +stage curtain went softly down. + +Anxiously, and a little pale, Herbert Loring peered through +the loophole in the curtain. It was not easy to judge of the +effects of his exhibition, and he did not know whether or not it +had been a success. There was no applause, but, on the other +hand, there was no signs that any one resented the exhibition as +a childish display of colored lights. It was impossible to look +upon that audience without believing that they had been +thoroughly interested in what they had seen, and that they +expected to see more. + +For two or three minutes Loring gazed through his loophole, +and then, still with some doubt in his heart, but with a little +more color in his checks, he prepared for the second part of his +performance. + +At this moment there entered the theatre, at the very back of +the house, a young lady. She was handsome and well dressed, and +as she opened the door--Loring had employed no ushers or other +assistants in this little social performance--she paused for a +moment and looked into the theatre, and then noiselessly +stepped to a chair in the back row and sat down. + +This was Edith Starr, who, a month before, had been betrothed +to Herbert Loring. Edith and her mother had been invited to this +performance, and front seats had been reserved for them, for each +guest had received a numbered card. But Mrs. Starr had a +headache, and could not go out that afternoon, and for a time her +daughter had thought that she, too, must give up the pleasure +Loring had promised her, and stay with her mother. But when the +elder lady dropped into a quiet sleep, Edith thought that, late +as it was, she would go by herself, and see what she could of the +performance. + +She was quite certain that if her presence were known to +Loring he would stop whatever he was doing until she had been +provided with a seat which he thought suitable for her, for he +had made a point of her being properly seated when he gave the +invitations. Therefore, being equally desirous of not disturbing +the performance and of not being herself conspicuous, she sat +behind two rather large men, where she could see the stage +perfectly well, but where she herself would not be likely to be +seen. + +In a few moments the curtain rose, and Loring came forward, +carrying a small, light table, which he placed near the front of +the stage, and for a moment stood quietly by it. Edith noticed +upon his face the expression of uncertainty and anxiety which had +not yet left it. Standing by the side of the table, and speaking +very slowly, but so clearly that his words could be heard +distinctly in all parts of the room, he began some introductory +remarks regarding the second part of his performance. + +"The extraordinary, and I may say marvellous, thing which I +am about to show you," he said, "is known among East Indian +magicians as the magic egg. The exhibition is a very uncommon +one, and has seldom been seen by Americans or Europeans, and it +was by a piece of rare good fortune that I became possessed of +the appliances necessary for this exhibition. They are indeed +very few and simple, but never before, to the best of my +knowledge and belief, have they been seen outside of India. + +"I will now get the little box which contains the articles +necessary for this magical performance, and I will say that if I +had time to tell you of the strange and amazing adventure which +resulted in my possession of this box, I am sure you would be as +much interested in that as I expect you to be in the contents of +the box. But in order that none of you may think this is an +ordinary trick, executed by means of concealed traps or doors, I +wish you to take particular notice of this table, which is, as +you see, a plain, unpainted pine table, with nothing but a flat +top, and four straight legs at the corners. You can see under +and around it, and it gives no opportunity to conceal anything." +Then, standing for a few moments as if he had something else to +say, he turned and stepped toward one of the wings. + +Edith was troubled as she looked at her lover during these +remarks. Her interest was great, greater, indeed, than that of +the people about her, but it was not a pleasant interest. As +Loring stopped speaking, and looked about him, there was a +momentary flush on his face. She knew this was caused by +excitement, and she was pale from the same cause. + +Very soon Loring came forward, and stood by the table. + +"Here is the box," he said, "of which I spoke, and as I hold +it up I think you all can see it. It is not large, being +certainly not more than twelve inches in length and two deep, but +it contains some very wonderful things. The outside of this box +is covered with delicate engraving and carving which you cannot +see, and these marks and lines have, I think, some magical +meaning, but I do not know what it is. I will now open the box +and show you what is inside. The first thing I take out is this +little stick, not thicker than a lead-pencil, but somewhat +longer, as you see. This is a magical wand, and is covered with +inscriptions of the same character as those on the outside of the +box. The next thing is this little red bag, well filled, as you +see, which I shall put on the table, for I shall not yet need it. + +"Now I take out a piece of cloth which is folded into a very +small compass, but as I unfold it you will perceive that it is +more than a foot square, and is covered with embroidery. All +those strange lines and figures in gold and red, which you can +plainly see on the cloth as I hold it up, are also characters in +the same magic language as those on the box and wand. I will now +spread the cloth on the table, and then take out the only +remaining thing in the box, and this is nothing in the world but +an egg--a simple, ordinary hen's egg, as you all see as I hold it +up. It may be a trifle larger than an ordinary egg, but then, +after all, it is nothing but a common egg--that is, in +appearance. In reality it is a good deal more. + +"Now I will begin the performance." And as he stood by the +back of the table, over which he had been slightly bending, and +threw his eyes over the audience, his voice was stronger, and his +face had lost all its pallor. He was evidently warming up with +his subject. + +"I now take up this wand," he said, "which, while I hold it, +gives me power to produce the phenomena which you are about to +behold. You may not all believe that there is any magic whatever +about this little performance, and that it is all a bit of +machinery; but whatever you may think about it, you shall see +what you shall see. + +"Now with this wand I gently touch this egg which is lying on +the square of cloth. I do not believe you can see what has +happened to this egg, but I will tell you. There is a little +line, like a hair, entirely around it. Now that line has become +a crack. Now you can see it, I know. It grows wider and wider! +Look! The shell of the egg is separating in the middle. The +whole egg slightly moves. Do you notice that? Now you can see +something yellow showing itself between the two parts of the +shell. See! It is moving a good deal, and the two halves of the +shell are separating more and more. And now out tumbles this +queer little object. Do you see what it is? It is a poor, weak, +little chick, not able to stand, but alive--alive! You can all +perceive that it is alive. Now you can see that it is standing +on its feet, feebly enough, but still standing. + +"Behold, it takes a few steps! You cannot doubt that it is +alive, and came out of that egg. It is beginning to walk about +over the cloth. Do you notice that it is picking the embroidery? + +Now, little chick, I will give you something to eat. This little +red bag contains grain, a magical grain, with which I shall feed +the chicken. You must excuse my awkwardness in opening the bag, +as I still hold the wand; but this little stick I must not drop. +See, little chick, there are some grains! They look like rice, +but, in fact, I have no idea what they are. But he knows, he +knows! Look at him! See how he picks it up! There! He has +swallowed one, two, three. That will do, little chick, for a +first meal. + +"The grain seems to have strengthened him already, for see +how lively he is, and how his yellow down stands out on him, so +puffy and warm! You are looking for some more grain, are you? +Well, you cannot have it just yet, and keep away from those +pieces of eggshell, which, by the way, I will put back into the +box. Now, sir, try to avoid the edge of the table, and, to quiet +you, I will give you a little tap on the back with my wand. Now, +then, please observe closely. The down which just now covered +him has almost gone. He is really a good deal bigger, and ever +so much uglier. See the little pin-feathers sticking out over +him! Some spots here and there are almost bare, but he is ever +so much more active. Ha! Listen to that! He is so strong that +you can hear his beak as he pecks at the table. He is actually +growing bigger and bigger before our very eyes! See that funny +little tail, how it begins to stick up, and quills are showing at +the end of his wings. + +"Another tap, and a few more grains. Careful, sir! Don't +tear the cloth! See how rapidly he grows! He is fairly covered +with feathers, red and black, with a tip of yellow in front. You +could hardly get that fellow into an ostrich egg! Now, then, +what do you think of him? He is big enough for a broiler, though +I don't think any one would want to take him for that purpose. +Some more grain, and another tap from my wand. See! He does not +mind the little stick, for he has been used to it from his very +birth. Now, then, he is what you would call a good half-grown +chick. Rather more than half grown, I should say. Do you notice +his tail? There is no mistaking him for a pullet. The long +feathers are beginning to curl over already. He must have a +little more grain. Look out, sir, or you will be off the table! +Come back here! This table is too small for him, but if he were +on the floor you could not see him so well. + +"Another tap. Now see that comb on the top of his head; you +scarcely noticed it before, and now it is bright red. And see +his spurs beginning to show--on good thick legs, too. There is a +fine young fellow for you! Look how he jerks his head from side +to side, like the young prince of a poultry-yard, as he well +deserves to be!" + +The attentive interest which had at first characterized the +audience now changed to excited admiration and amazement. Some +leaned forward with mouths wide open. Others stood up so that +they could see better. Ejaculations of astonishment and wonder +were heard on every side, and a more thoroughly fascinated and +absorbed audience was never seen. + +"Now, my friends," Loring continued, "I will give this +handsome fowl another tap. Behold the result--a noble, full- +grown cock! Behold his spurs! They are nearly an inch long! +See, there is a comb for you! And what a magnificent tail of +green and black, contrasting so finely with the deep red of the +rest of his body! Well, sir, you are truly too big for this +table. As I cannot give you more room, I will set you up higher. +Move over a little, and I will set this chair on the table. +There! Upon the seat! That's right, but don't stop. There is +the back, which is higher yet! Up with you! Ha! There, he +nearly upset the chair, but I will hold it. See! He has turned +around. Now, then, look at him. See his wings as he flaps them! +He could fly with such wings. Look at him! See that swelling +breast! Ha, ha! Listen! Did you ever hear a crow like that? +It fairly rings through the house. Yes, I knew it! There is +another!" + +At this point the people in the house were in a state of wild +excitement. Nearly all of them were on their feet, and they were +in such a condition of frantic enthusiasm that Loring was afraid +some of them might make a run for the stage. + +"Come, sir," cried Loring, now almost shouting, "that will +do. You have shown us the strength of your lungs. Jump down on +the seat of the chair; now on the table. There, I will take away +the chair, and you can stand for a moment on the table and let +our friends look at you; but only for a moment. Take that tap on +your back. Now do you see any difference? Perhaps you may not, +but I do. Yes, I believe you all do. He is not the big fellow +he was a minute ago. He is really smaller--only a fine +cockerel. A nice tail that, but with none of the noble sweep +that it had a minute ago. No, don't try to get off the table. +You can't escape my wand. Another tap. Behold a half-grown +chicken, good to eat, but with not a crow in him. Hungry, are +you? But you need not pick at the table that way. You get no +more grain, but only this little tap. Ha, ha! What are you +coming to? There is a chicken barely feathered enough for us to +tell what color he is going to be. + +"Another tap will take still more of the conceit out of him. +Look at him! There are his pin-feathers, and his bare spots. +Don't try to get away; I can easily tap you again. Now then. +Here is a lovely little chick, fluffy with yellow down. He is +active enough, but I shall quiet him. One tap, and now what do +you see? A poor, feeble chicken, scarcely able to stand, with +his down all packed close to him as if he had been out in the +rain. Ah, little chick, I will take the two halves of the egg- +shell from which you came, and put them on each side of you. +Come, now get in! I close them up. You are lost to view. There +is nothing to be seen but a crack around the shell! Now it has +gone! There, my friends; as I hold it on high, behold the magic +egg, exactly as it was when I first took it out of the box, into +which I will place it again, with the cloth and the wand and the +little red bag, and shut it up with a snap. I will let you take +one more look at this box before I put it away behind the scenes. +Are you satisfied with what I have shown you? Do you think it is +really as wonderful as you supposed it would be?" + +At these words the whole audience burst into riotous +applause, during which Loring disappeared, but he was back in a +moment. + +"Thank you!" he cried, bowing low, and waving his arms before +him in the manner of an Eastern magician making a salaam. From +side to side he turned, bowing and thanking, and then, with a +hearty "Good-by to you; good-by to you all!" he stepped back and +let down the curtain. + +For some moments the audience remained in their seats as if +they were expecting something more, and then they rose quietly +and began to disperse. Most of them were acquainted with one +another, and there was a good deal of greeting and talking as +they went out of the theatre. + +When Loring was sure the last person had departed, he turned +down the lights, locked the door, and gave the key to the steward +of the club. + +He walked to his home a happy man. His exhibition had been a +perfect success, with not a break or a flaw in it from beginning +to end. + +"I feel," thought the young man, as he strode along, "as if I +could fly to the top of that steeple, and flap and crow until all +the world heard me." + +That evening, as was his daily custom, Herbert Loring called +upon Miss Starr. He found the young lady in the library. + +"I came in here," she said, "because I have a good deal to +talk to you about, and I do not want interruptions." + +With this arrangement the young man expressed his entire +satisfaction, and immediately began to inquire the cause of her +absence from his exhibition in the afternoon. + +"But I was there," said Edith. "You did not see me, but I +was there. Mother had a headache, and I went by myself." + +"You were there!" exclaimed Loring, almost starting from his +chair. "I don't understand. You were not in your seat." + + "No," answered Edith. "I was on the very back row of seats. +You could not see me, and I did not wish you to see me." + +"Edith!" exclaimed Loring, rising to his feet and leaning +over the library table, which was between them. "When did you +come? How much of the performance did you see?" + +"I was late," she said. "I did not arrive until after the +fireworks, or whatever they were." + +For a moment Loring was silent, as if he did not understand +the situation. + +"Fireworks!" he said. "How did you know there had been +fireworks?" + +"I heard the people talking of them as they left the +theatre," she answered. + +"And what did they say?" he inquired quickly. + +"They seemed to like them very well," she replied, "but I do +not think they were quite satisfied. From what I heard some +persons say, I inferred that they thought it was not very much of +a show to which you had invited them." + +Again Loring stood in thought, looking down at the table. +But before he could speak again, Edith sprang to her feet. + +"Herbert Loring," she cried, "what does all this mean? I was +there during the whole of the exhibition of what you called the +magic egg. I saw all those people wild with excitement at +the wonderful sight of the chicken that came out of the egg, and +grew to full size, and then dwindled down again, and went back +into the egg, and, Herbert, there was no egg, and there was no +little box, and there was no wand, and no embroidered cloth, and +there was no red bag, nor any little chick, and there was no +full-grown fowl, and there was no chair that you put on the +table! There was nothing, absolutely nothing, but you and that +table! Even the table was not what you said it was. It was not +an unpainted pine table with four straight legs. It was a table +of dark polished wood, and it stood on a single post with feet. +There was nothing there that you said was there. Everything was +a sham and a delusion; every word you spoke was untrue. And yet +everybody in that theatre, excepting you and me, saw all the +things that you said were on the stage. I know they saw them +all, for I was with the people, and heard them, and saw them, and +at times I fairly felt the thrill of enthusiasm which possessed +them as they glared at the miracles and wonders you said were +happening." + +Loring smiled. "Sit down, my dear Edith," he said. "You are +excited, and there is not the slightest cause for it. I will +explain the whole affair to you. It is simple enough. You know +that study is the great object of my life. I study all sorts of +things; and just now I am greatly interested in hypnotism. The +subject has become fascinating to me. I have made a great many +successful trials of my power, and the affair of this afternoon +was nothing but a trial of my powers on a more extensive scale +than anything I have yet attempted. I wanted to see if it were +possible for me to hypnotize a considerable number of people +without any one suspecting what I intended to do. The result was +a success. I hypnotized all those people by means of the first +part of my performance, which consisted of some combinations of +colored glass with lights thrown upon them. They revolved, and +looked like fireworks, and were strung on a wire high up on the +stage. + +"I kept up the glittering and dazzling show--which was well +worth seeing, I can assure you--until the people had been +straining their eyes upward for almost half an hour. And this +sort of thing--I will tell you if you do not know it--is one of +the methods of producing hypnotic sleep. + +"There was no one present who was not an impressionable +subject, for I was very careful in sending out my invitations, +and when I became almost certain that my audience was thoroughly +hypnotized, I stopped the show and began the real exhibition, +which was not really for their benefit, but for mine. + +"Of course, I was dreadfully anxious for fear I had not +succeeded entirely, and that there might be at least some one +person who had not succumbed to the hypnotic influences, and so I +tested the matter by bringing out that table and telling them it +was something it was not. If I had had any reason for supposing +that some of the audience saw the table as it really was, I had +an explanation ready, and I could have retired from my position +without any one supposing that I had intended making hypnotic +experiments. The rest of the exhibition would have been some +things that any one could see, and as soon as possible I would +have released from their spell those who were hypnotized. But +when I became positively assured that every one saw a light pine +table with four straight legs, I confidently went on with the +performances of the magic egg." + +Edith Starr was still standing by the library table. She had +not heeded Loring's advice to sit down, and she was trembling +with emotion. + +"Herbert Loring," she said, "you invited my mother and me to +that exhibition. You gave us tickets for front seats, where we +would be certain to be hypnotized if your experiment succeeded, +and you would have made us see that false show, which faded from +those people's minds as soon as they recovered from the spell, +for as they went away they were talking only of the fireworks, +and not one of them mentioned a magic egg, or a chicken, or +anything of the kind. Answer me this: did you not intend that I +should come and be put under that spell?" + +Loring smiled. "Yes," he said, "of course I did. But then +your case would have been different from that of the other +spectators: I should have explained the whole thing to you, and I +am sure we would have had a great deal of pleasure, and profit +too, in discussing your experiences. The subject is extremely--" + +"Explain to me!" she cried. "You would not have dared to do +it! I do not know how brave you may be, but I know you would not +have had the courage to come here and tell me that you had taken +away my reason and my judgment, as you took them away from all +those people, and that you had made me a mere tool of your will-- +glaring and panting with excitement at the wonderful things you +told me to see where nothing existed. I have nothing to say +about the others. They can speak for themselves if they ever +come to know what you did to them. I speak for myself. I stood +up with the rest of the people. I gazed with all my power, and +over and over again I asked myself if it could be possible that +anything was the matter with my eyes or my brain, and if I could +be the only person there who could not see the marvellous +spectacle that you were describing. But now I know that nothing +was real, not even the little pine table--not even the man!" + +"Not even me!" exclaimed Loring. "Surely I was real enough!" + +"On that stage, yes," she said. "But you there proved you +were not the Herbert Loring to whom I promised myself. He was an +unreal being. If he had existed he would not have been a man who +would have brought me to that public place, all ignorant of his +intentions, to cloud my perceptions, to subject my intellect to +his own, and make me believe a lie. If a man should treat me in +that way once he would treat me so at other times, and in other +ways, if he had the chance. You have treated me in the past as +to-day you treated those people who glared at the magic egg. In +the days gone by you made me see an unreal man, but you will +never do it again! Good-by." + +"Edith," cried Loring, "you don't--" + +But she had disappeared through a side door, and he never +spoke to her again. + +Walking home through the dimly lighted streets, Loring +involuntarily spoke aloud. + +"And this," he said, "is what came out of the magic egg!" + + + + "HIS WIFE'S DECEASED SISTER" + +It is now five years since an event occurred which so colored my +life, or rather so changed some of its original colors, that I +have thought it well to write an account of it, deeming that its +lessons may be of advantage to persons whose situations in life +are similar to my own. + +When I was quite a young man I adopted literature as a +profession, and having passed through the necessary preparatory +grades, I found myself, after a good many years of hard and often +unremunerative work, in possession of what might be called a fair +literary practice. My articles, grave, gay, practical, or +fanciful, had come to be considered with a favor by the editors +of the various periodicals for which I wrote, on which I found in +time I could rely with a very comfortable certainty. My +productions created no enthusiasm in the reading public; they +gave me no great reputation or very valuable pecuniary return; +but they were always accepted, and my receipts from them, at the +time to which I have referred, were as regular and reliable as a +salary, and quite sufficient to give me more than a comfortable +support. + +It was at this time I married. I had been engaged for more +than a year, but had not been willing to assume the support of +a wife until I felt that my pecuniary position was so assured +that I could do so with full satisfaction to my own conscience. +There was now no doubt in regard to this position, either in my +mind or in that of my wife. I worked with great steadiness and +regularity, I knew exactly where to place the productions of my +pen, and could calculate, with a fair degree of accuracy, the +sums I should receive for them. We were by no means rich, but we +had enough, and were thoroughly satisfied and content. + +Those of my readers who are married will have no difficulty +in remembering the peculiar ecstasy of the first weeks of their +wedded life. It is then that the flowers of this world bloom +brightest; that its sun is the most genial; that its clouds are +the scarcest; that its fruit is the most delicious; that the air +is the most balmy; that its cigars are of the highest flavor; +that the warmth and radiance of early matrimonial felicity so +rarefy the intellectual atmosphere that the soul mounts higher, +and enjoys a wider prospect, than ever before. + +These experiences were mine. The plain claret of my mind was +changed to sparkling champagne, and at the very height of its +effervescence I wrote a story. The happy thought that then +struck me for a tale was of a very peculiar character, and it +interested me so much that I went to work at it with great +delight and enthusiasm, and finished it in a comparatively short +time. The title of the story was "His Wife's Deceased Sister," +and when I read it to Hypatia she was delighted with it, and at +times was so affected by its pathos that her uncontrollable +emotion caused a sympathetic dimness in my eyes which +prevented my seeing the words I had written. When the reading +was ended and my wife had dried her eyes, she turned to me and +said, "This story will make your fortune. There has been nothing +so pathetic since Lamartine's `History of a Servant Girl.'" + +As soon as possible the next day I sent my story to the +editor of the periodical for which I wrote most frequently, and +in which my best productions generally appeared. In a few days I +had a letter from the editor, in which he praised my story as he +had never before praised anything from my pen. It had interested +and charmed, he said, not only himself, but all his associates in +the office. Even old Gibson, who never cared to read anything +until it was in proof, and who never praised anything which had +not a joke in it, was induced by the example of the others to +read this manuscript, and shed, as he asserted, the first tears +that had come from his eyes since his final paternal castigation +some forty years before. The story would appear, the editor +assured me, as soon as he could possibly find room for it. + + If anything could make our skies more genial, our flowers +brighter, and the flavor of our fruit and cigars more delicious, +it was a letter like this. And when, in a very short time, the +story was published, we found that the reading public was +inclined to receive it with as much sympathetic interest and +favor as had been shown to it by the editors. My personal +friends soon began to express enthusiastic opinions upon it. It +was highly praised in many of the leading newspapers, and, +altogether, it was a great literary success. I am not inclined +to be vain of my writings, and, in general, my wife tells me, +I think too little of them. But I did feel a good deal of pride +and satisfaction in the success of "His Wife's Deceased Sister." +If it did not make my fortune, as my wife asserted it would, it +certainly would help me very much in my literary career. + +In less than a month from the writing of this story, +something very unusual and unexpected happened to me. A +manuscript was returned by the editor of the periodical in which +"His Wife's Deceased Sister" had appeared. + + +"It is a good story," he wrote, "but not equal to what you +have just done. You have made a great hit, and it would not do +to interfere with the reputation you have gained by publishing +anything inferior to `His Wife's Deceased Sister,' which has had +such a deserved success." + + +I was so unaccustomed to having my work thrown back on my +hands that I think I must have turned a little pale when I read +the letter. I said nothing of the matter to my wife, for it +would be foolish to drop such grains of sand as this into the +smoothly oiled machinery of our domestic felicity, but I +immediately sent the story to another editor. I am not able to +express the astonishment I felt when, in the course of a week, it +was sent back to me. The tone of the note accompanying it +indicated a somewhat injured feeling on the part of the editor. + + +"I am reluctant," he said, "to decline a manuscript from you; +but you know very well that if you sent me anything like `His +Wife's Deceased Sister' it would be most promptly accepted." + +I now felt obliged to speak of the affair to my wife, who was +quite as much surprised, though, perhaps, not quite as much +shocked, as I had been. + +"Let us read the story again," she said, "and see what is the +matter with it." When we had finished its perusal, Hypatia +remarked: "It is quite as good as many of the stories you have +had printed, and I think it very interesting, although, of +course, it is not equal to `His Wife's Deceased Sister.'" + +"Of course not," said I; "that was an inspiration that I +cannot expect every day. But there must be something wrong about +this last story which we do not perceive. Perhaps my recent +success may have made me a little careless in writing it." + +"I don't believe that," said Hypatia. + +"At any rate," I continued, "I will lay it aside, and will go +to work on a new one." + +In due course of time I had another manuscript finished, and +I sent it to my favorite periodical. It was retained some weeks, +and then came back to me. + +"It will never do," the editor wrote, quite warmly, "for you +to go backward. The demand for the number containing `His Wife's +Deceased Sister' still continues, and we do not intend to let you +disappoint that great body of readers who would be so eager to +see another number containing one of your stories." + + +I sent this manuscript to four other periodicals, and from +each of them it was returned with remarks to the effect that, +although it was not a bad story in itself, it was not what they +would expect from the author of "His Wife's Deceased Sister." + +The editor of a Western magazine wrote to me for a story +to be published in a special number which he would issue for the +holidays. I wrote him one of the character and length he +desired, and sent it to him. By return mail it came back to me. + + +"I had hoped," the editor wrote, "when I asked for a story +from your pen, to receive something like `His Wife's Deceased +Sister,' and I must own that I am very much disappointed." + + +I was so filled with anger when I read this note that I +openly objurgated "His Wife's Deceased Sister." "You must excuse +me," I said to my astonished wife, "for expressing myself thus in +your presence, but that confounded story will be the ruin of me +yet. Until it is forgotten nobody will ever take anything I +write." + +"And you cannot expect it ever to be forgotten," said +Hypatia, with tears in her eyes. + +It is needless for me to detail my literary efforts in the +course of the next few months. The ideas of the editors with +whom my principal business had been done, in regard to my +literary ability, had been so raised by my unfortunate story of +"His Wife's Deceased Sister" that I found it was of no use to +send them anything of lesser merit. And as to the other journals +which I tried, they evidently considered it an insult for me to +send them matter inferior to that by which my reputation had +lately risen. The fact was that my successful story had ruined +me. My income was at an end, and want actually stared me in the +face; and I must admit that I did not like the expression of its +countenance. It was of no use for me to try to write another +story like "His Wife's Deceased Sister." I could not get married +every time I began a new manuscript, and it was the +exaltation of mind caused by my wedded felicity which produced +that story. + +"It's perfectly dreadful!" said my wife. "If I had had a +sister, and she had died, I would have thought it was my fault." + +"It could not be your fault," I answered, "and I do not think +it was mine. I had no intention of deceiving anybody into the +belief that I could do that sort of thing every time, and it +ought not to be expected of me. Suppose Raphael's patrons had +tried to keep him screwed up to the pitch of the Sistine Madonna, +and had refused to buy anything which was not as good as that. +In that case I think he would have occupied a much earlier and +narrower grave than the one on which Mr. Morris Moore hangs his +funeral decorations." + +"But, my dear," said Hypatia, who was posted on such +subjects, "the Sistine Madonna was one of his latest paintings." + +"Very true," said I. "But if he had married as I did, he +would have painted it earlier." + +I was walking homeward one afternoon about this time, when I +met Barbel, a man I had known well in my early literary career. +He was now about fifty years of age, but looked older. His hair +and beard were quite gray, and his clothes, which were of the +same general hue, gave me the idea that they, like his hair, had +originally been black. Age is very hard on a man's external +appointments. Barbel had an air of having been to let for a long +time, and quite out of repair. But there was a kindly gleam in +his eye, and he welcomed me cordially. + +"Why, what is the matter, old fellow?" said he. "I never saw +you look so woe-begone." + +I had no reason to conceal anything from Barbel. In my +younger days he had been of great use to me, and he had a right +to know the state of my affairs. I laid the whole case plainly +before him. + +"Look here," he said, when I had finished; "come with me to +my room; I have something I would like to say to you there." + +I followed Barbel to his room. It was at the top of a very +dirty and well-worn house, which stood in a narrow and lumpy +street, into which few vehicles ever penetrated, except the ash +and garbage-carts, and the rickety wagons of the venders of stale +vegetables. + +"This is not exactly a fashionable promenade," said Barbel, +as we approached the house, "but in some respects it reminds me +of the streets in Italian towns, where the palaces lean over +toward each other in such a friendly way." + +Barbel's room was, to my mind, rather more doleful than the +street. It was dark, it was dusty, and cobwebs hung from every +corner. The few chairs upon the floor and the books upon a +greasy table seemed to be afflicted with some dorsal epidemic, +for their backs were either gone or broken. A little bedstead in +the corner was covered with a spread made of New York "Heralds" +with their edges pasted together. + +"There is nothing better," said Barbel, noticing my glance +toward this novel counterpane, "for a bed-covering than +newspapers; they keep you as warm as a blanket, and are much +lighter. I used to use `Tribunes,' but they rattled too much." + +The only part of the room which was well lighted was one +end near the solitary window. Here, upon a table with a spliced +leg, stood a little grindstone. + +"At the other end of the room," said Barbel, "is my cook- +stove, which you can't see unless I light the candle in the +bottle which stands by it. But if you don't care particularly to +examine it, I won't go to the expense of lighting up. You might +pick up a good many odd pieces of bric-a-brac, around here, if +you chose to strike a match and investigate. But I would not +advise you to do so. It would pay better to throw the things out +of the window than to carry them down-stairs. The particular +piece of indoor decoration to which I wish to call your attention +is this." And he led me to a little wooden frame which hung +against the wall near the window. Behind a dusty piece of glass +it held what appeared to be a leaf from a small magazine or +journal. "There," said he, "you see a page from the +`Grasshopper,' a humorous paper which flourished in this city +some half-dozen years ago. I used to write regularly for that +paper, as you may remember." + +"Oh, yes, indeed!" I exclaimed. "And I shall never forget +your `Conundrum of the Anvil' which appeared in it. How often +have I laughed at that most wonderful conceit, and how often have +I put it to my friends!" + +Barbel gazed at me silently for a moment, and then he pointed +to the frame. "That printed page," he said solemnly, "contains +the `Conundrum of the Anvil.' I hang it there so that I can see +it while I work. That conundrum ruined me. It was the last +thing I wrote for the `Grasshopper.' How I ever came to imagine +it, I cannot tell. It is one of those things which occur to +a man but once in a lifetime. After the wild shout of delight +with which the public greeted that conundrum, my subsequent +efforts met with hoots of derision. The `Grasshopper' turned its +hind legs upon me. I sank from bad to worse,--much worse,--until +at last I found myself reduced to my present occupation, which is +that of grinding points on pins. By this I procure my bread, +coffee, and tobacco, and sometimes potatoes and meat. One day +while I was hard at work, an organ-grinder came into the street +below. He played the serenade from `Trovatore' and the familiar +notes brought back visions of old days and old delights, when the +successful writer wore good clothes and sat at operas, when he +looked into sweet eyes and talked of Italian airs, when his +future appeared all a succession of bright scenery and joyous +acts, without any provision for a drop-curtain. And as my ear +listened, and my mind wandered in this happy retrospect, my every +faculty seemed exalted, and, without any thought upon the matter, +I ground points upon my pins so fine, so regular, and so smooth +that they would have pierced with ease the leather of a boot, or +slipped, without abrasion, among the finest threads of rare old +lace. When the organ stopped, and I fell back into my real world +of cobwebs and mustiness, I gazed upon the pins I had just +ground, and, without a moment's hesitation, I threw them into the +street, and reported the lot as spoiled. This cost me a little +money, but it saved me my livelihood." + +After a few moments of silence, Barbel resumed: + +"I have no more to say to you, my young friend. All I want +you to do is to look upon that framed conundrum, then upon +this grindstone, and then to go home and reflect. As for me, I +have a gross of pins to grind before the sun goes down." + +I cannot say that my depression of mind was at all relieved +by what I had seen and heard. I had lost sight of Barbel for +some years, and I had supposed him still floating on the sun- +sparkling stream of prosperity where I had last seen him. It was +a great shock to me to find him in such a condition of poverty +and squalor, and to see a man who had originated the "Conundrum +of the Anvil" reduced to the soul-depressing occupation of +grinding pin-points. As I walked and thought, the dreadful +picture of a totally eclipsed future arose before my mind. The +moral of Barbel sank deep into my heart. + +When I reached home I told my wife the story of my friend +Barbel. She listened with a sad and eager interest. + +"I am afraid," she said, "if our fortunes do not quickly +mend, that we shall have to buy two little grindstones. You know +I could help you at that sort of thing." + +For a long time we sat together and talked, and devised many +plans for the future. I did not think it necessary yet for me to +look out for a pin contract; but I must find some way of making +money, or we should starve to death. Of course, the first thing +that suggested itself was the possibility of finding some other +business. But, apart from the difficulty of immediately +obtaining remunerative work in occupations to which I had not +been trained, I felt a great and natural reluctance to give up a +profession for which I had carefully prepared myself, and which +I had adopted as my life-work. It would be very hard for me +to lay down my pen forever, and to close the top of my inkstand +upon all the bright and happy fancies which I had seen mirrored +in its tranquil pool. We talked and pondered the rest of that +day and a good deal of the night, but we came to no conclusion as +to what it would be best for us to do. + +The next day I determined to go and call upon the editor of +the journal for which, in happier days, before the blight of "His +Wife's Deceased Sister" rested upon me, I used most frequently to +write, and, having frankly explained my condition to him, to ask +his advice. The editor was a good man, and had always been my +friend. He listened with great attention to what I told him, and +evidently sympathized with me in my trouble. + +"As we have written to you," he said, "the only reason why we +did not accept the manuscripts you sent us was that they would +have disappointed the high hopes that the public had formed in +regard to you. We have had letter after letter asking when we +were going to publish another story like `His Wife's Deceased +Sister.' We felt, and we still feel, that it would be wrong to +allow you to destroy the fair fabric which you yourself have +raised. But," he added, with a kind smile, "I see very plainly +that your well-deserved reputation will be of little advantage to +you if you should starve at the moment that its genial beams are, +so to speak, lighting you up." + +"Its beams are not genial," I answered. "They have scorched +and withered me." + +"How would you like," said the editor, after a short +reflection, "to allow us to publish the stories you have +recently written under some other name than your own? That would +satisfy us and the public, would put money in your pocket, and +would not interfere with your reputation." + +Joyfully I seized the noble fellow by the hand, and instantly +accepted his proposition. "Of course," said I, "a reputation is +a very good thing; but no reputation can take the place of food, +clothes, and a house to live in, and I gladly agree to sink my +over-illumined name into oblivion, and to appear before the +public as a new and unknown writer." + +"I hope that need not be for long," he said, "for I feel sure +that you will yet write stories as good as `His Wife's Deceased +Sister.'" + +All the manuscripts I had on hand I now sent to my good +friend the editor, and in due and proper order they appeared in +his journal under the name of John Darmstadt, which I had +selected as a substitute for my own, permanently disabled. I +made a similar arrangement with other editors, and John Darmstadt +received the credit of everything that proceeded from my pen. +Our circumstances now became very comfortable, and occasionally +we even allowed ourselves to indulge in little dreams of +prosperity. + +Time passed on very pleasantly. One year, another, and then +a little son was born to us. It is often difficult, I believe, +for thoughtful persons to decide whether the beginning of their +conjugal career, or the earliest weeks in the life of their +first-born, be the happiest and proudest period of their +existence. For myself I can only say that the same exaltation of +mind, the same rarefication of idea and invention, which +succeeded upon my wedding day came upon me now. As then, my +ecstatic emotions crystallized themselves into a motive for a +story, and without delay I set myself to work upon it. My boy +was about six weeks old when the manuscript was finished, and one +evening, as we sat before a comfortable fire in our sitting-room, +with the curtains drawn, and the soft lamp lighted, and the baby +sleeping soundly in the adjoining chamber, I read the story to my +wife. + +When I had finished, my wife arose and threw herself into my +arms. "I was never so proud of you," she said, her glad eyes +sparkling, "as I am at this moment. That is a wonderful story! +It is, indeed I am sure it is, just as good as `His Wife's +Deceased Sister.'" + +As she spoke these words, a sudden and chilling sensation +crept over us both. All her warmth and fervor, and the proud and +happy glow engendered within me by this praise and appreciation +from one I loved, vanished in an instant. We stepped apart, and +gazed upon each other with pallid faces. In the same moment the +terrible truth had flashed upon us both. This story WAS as +good as "His Wife's Deceased Sister"! + +We stood silent. The exceptional lot of Barbel's super- +pointed pins seemed to pierce our very souls. A dreadful vision +rose before me of an impending fall and crash, in which our +domestic happiness should vanish, and our prospects for our boy +be wrecked, just as we had began to build them up. + +My wife approached me, and took my hand in hers, which was as +cold as ice. "Be strong and firm," she said. "A great danger +threatens us, but you must brace yourself against it. Be strong +and firm." + +I pressed her hand, and we said no more that night. + +The next day I took the manuscript I had just written, and +carefully infolded it in stout wrapping-paper. Then I went to a +neighboring grocery store and bought a small, strong, tin box, +originally intended for biscuit, with a cover that fitted +tightly. In this I placed my manuscript, and then I took the box +to a tinsmith and had the top fastened on with hard solder. When +I went home I ascended into the garret and brought down to my +study a ship's cash-box, which had once belonged to one of my +family who was a sea-captain. This box was very heavy, and +firmly bound with iron, and was secured by two massive locks. +Calling my wife, I told her of the contents of the tin case, +which I then placed in the box, and having shut down the heavy +lid, I doubly locked it. + +"This key," said I, putting it in my pocket, "I shall throw +into the river when I go out this afternoon." + +My wife watched me eagerly, with a pallid and firm-set +countenance, but upon which I could see the faint glimmer of +returning happiness. + +"Wouldn't it be well," she said, "to secure it still further +by sealing-wax and pieces of tape?" + +"No," said I. "I do not believe that any one will attempt to +tamper with our prosperity. And now, my dear," I continued in an +impressive voice, "no one but you, and, in the course of time, +our son, shall know that this manuscript exists. When I am dead, +those who survive me may, if they see fit, cause this box to be +split open and the story published. The reputation it may give +my name cannot harm me then." + + + + + THE WIDOW'S CRUISE + +The Widow Ducket lived in a small village about ten miles +from the New Jersey sea-coast. In this village she was born, +here she had married and buried her husband, and here she +expected somebody to bury her; but she was in no hurry for this, +for she had scarcely reached middle age. She was a tall woman +with no apparent fat in her composition, and full of activity, +both muscular and mental. + +She rose at six o'clock in the morning, cooked breakfast, set +the table, washed the dishes when the meal was over, milked, +churned, swept, washed, ironed, worked in her little garden, +attended to the flowers in the front yard, and in the afternoon +knitted and quilted and sewed, and after tea she either went to +see her neighbors or had them come to see her. When it was +really dark she lighted the lamp in her parlor and read for an +hour, and if it happened to be one of Miss Mary Wilkins's books +that she read she expressed doubts as to the realism of the +characters therein described. + +These doubts she expressed to Dorcas Networthy, who was a +small, plump woman, with a solemn face, who had lived with the +widow for many years and who had become her devoted disciple. +Whatever the widow did, that also did Dorcas--not so well, +for her heart told her she could never expect to do that, but +with a yearning anxiety to do everything as well as she could. +She rose at five minutes past six, and in a subsidiary way she +helped to get the breakfast, to eat it, to wash up the dishes, to +work in the garden, to quilt, to sew, to visit and receive, and +no one could have tried harder than she did to keep awake when +the widow read aloud in the evening. + +All these things happened every day in the summertime, but in +the winter the widow and Dorcas cleared the snow from their +little front path instead of attending to the flowers, and in the +evening they lighted a fire as well as a lamp in the parlor. + +Sometimes, however, something different happened, but this +was not often, only a few times in the year. One of the +different things occurred when Mrs. Ducket and Dorcas were +sitting on their little front porch one summer afternoon, one on +the little bench on one side of the door, and the other on the +little bench on the other side of the door, each waiting until +she should hear the clock strike five, to prepare tea. But it +was not yet a quarter to five when a one-horse wagon containing +four men came slowly down the street. Dorcas first saw the +wagon, and she instantly stopped knitting. + +"Mercy on me!" she exclaimed. "Whoever those people are, +they are strangers here, and they don't know where to stop, for +they first go to one side of the street and then to the other." + +The widow looked around sharply. "Humph!" said she. "Those +men are sailormen. You might see that in a twinklin' of an eye. +Sailormen always drive that way, because that is the way they +sail ships. They first tack in one direction and then in +another." + +"Mr. Ducket didn't like the sea?" remarked Dorcas, for about +the three hundredth time. + +"No, he didn't," answered the widow, for about the two +hundred and fiftieth time, for there had been occasions when she +thought Dorcas put this question inopportunely. "He hated it, +and he was drowned in it through trustin' a sailorman, which I +never did nor shall. Do you really believe those men are comin' +here?" + +"Upon my word I do!" said Dorcas, and her opinion was +correct. + +The wagon drew up in front of Mrs. Ducket's little white +house, and the two women sat rigidly, their hands in their laps, +staring at the man who drove. + +This was an elderly personage with whitish hair, and under +his chin a thin whitish beard, which waved in the gentle breeze +and gave Dorcas the idea that his head was filled with hair which +was leaking out from below. + +"Is this the Widow Ducket's?" inquired this elderly man, in a +strong, penetrating voice. + +"That's my name," said the widow, and laying her knitting on +the bench beside her, she went to the gate. Dorcas also laid her +knitting on the bench beside her and went to the gate. + +"I was told," said the elderly man, "at a house we touched at +about a quarter of a mile back, that the Widow Ducket's was the +only house in this village where there was any chance of me and +my mates getting a meal. We are four sailors, and we are making +from the bay over to Cuppertown, and that's eight miles ahead +yet, and we are all pretty sharp set for something to eat." + +"This is the place," said the widow, "and I do give meals if +there is enough in the house and everything comes handy." + +"Does everything come handy to-day?" said he. + +"It does," said she, "and you can hitch your horse and come +in; but I haven't got anything for him." + +"Oh, that's all right," said the man, "we brought along +stores for him, so we'll just make fast and then come in." + +The two women hurried into the house in a state of bustling +preparation, for the furnishing of this meal meant one dollar in +cash. + +The four mariners, all elderly men, descended from the wagon, +each one scrambling with alacrity over a different wheel. + +A box of broken ship-biscuit was brought out and put on the +ground in front of the horse, who immediately set himself to +eating with great satisfaction. + +Tea was a little late that day, because there were six +persons to provide for instead of two, but it was a good meal, +and after the four seamen had washed their hands and faces at the +pump in the back yard and had wiped them on two towels furnished +by Dorcas, they all came in and sat down. Mrs. Ducket seated +herself at the head of the table with the dignity proper to the +mistress of the house, and Dorcas seated herself at the other end +with the dignity proper to the disciple of the mistress. No +service was necessary, for everything that was to be eaten or +drunk was on the table. + +When each of the elderly mariners had had as much bread +and butter, quickly baked soda-biscuit, dried beef, cold ham, +cold tongue, and preserved fruit of every variety known, as his +storage capacity would permit, the mariner in command, Captain +Bird, pushed back his chair, whereupon the other mariners pushed +back their chairs. + +"Madam," said Captain Bird, "we have all made a good meal, +which didn't need to be no better nor more of it, and we're +satisfied; but that horse out there has not had time to rest +himself enough to go the eight miles that lies ahead of us, so, +if it's all the same to you and this good lady, we'd like to sit +on that front porch awhile and smoke our pipes. I was a-looking +at that porch when I came in, and I bethought to myself what a +rare good place it was to smoke a pipe in." + +"There's pipes been smoked there," said the widow, rising, +"and it can be done again. Inside the house I don't allow +tobacco, but on the porch neither of us minds." + + So the four captains betook themselves to the porch, two of +them seating themselves on the little bench on one side of the +door, and two of them on the little bench on the other side of +the door, and lighted their pipes. + +"Shall we clear off the table and wash up the dishes," said +Dorcas, "or wait until they are gone?" + +"We will wait until they are gone," said the widow, "for now +that they are here we might as well have a bit of a chat with +them. When a sailorman lights his pipe he is generally willin' +to talk, but when he is eatin' you can't get a word out of him." + +Without thinking it necessary to ask permission, for the +house belonged to her, the Widow Ducket brought a chair and +put it in the hall close to the open front door, and Dorcas +brought another chair and seated herself by the side of the +widow. + +"Do all you sailormen belong down there at the bay?" asked +Mrs. Ducket; thus the conversation began, and in a few minutes it +had reached a point at which Captain Bird thought it proper to +say that a great many strange things happen to seamen sailing on +the sea which lands-people never dream of. + +"Such as anything in particular?" asked the widow, at which +remark Dorcas clasped her hands in expectancy. + +At this question each of the mariners took his pipe from his +mouth and gazed upon the floor in thought. + +"There's a good many strange things happened to me and my +mates at sea. Would you and that other lady like to hear any of +them?" asked Captain Bird. + +"We would like to hear them if they are true," said the +widow. + +"There's nothing happened to me and my mates that isn't +true," said Captain Bird, "and here is something that once +happened to me: I was on a whaling v'yage when a big sperm- +whale, just as mad as a fiery bull, came at us, head on, and +struck the ship at the stern with such tremendous force that his +head crashed right through her timbers and he went nearly half +his length into her hull. The hold was mostly filled with empty +barrels, for we was just beginning our v'yage, and when he had +made kindling-wood of these there was room enough for him. We +all expected that it wouldn't take five minutes for the vessel to +fill and go to the bottom, and we made ready to take to the +boats; but it turned out we didn't need to take to no boats, +for as fast as the water rushed into the hold of the ship, that +whale drank it and squirted it up through the two blow-holes in +the top of his head, and as there was an open hatchway just over +his head, the water all went into the sea again, and that whale +kept working day and night pumping the water out until we beached +the vessel on the island of Trinidad--the whale helping us +wonderful on our way over by the powerful working of his tail, +which, being outside in the water, acted like a propeller. I +don't believe any thing stranger than that ever happened to a +whaling ship." + +"No," said the widow, "I don't believe anything ever did." + +Captain Bird now looked at Captain Sanderson, and the latter +took his pipe out of his mouth and said that in all his sailing +around the world he had never known anything queerer than what +happened to a big steamship he chanced to be on, which ran into +an island in a fog. Everybody on board thought the ship was +wrecked, but it had twin screws, and was going at such a +tremendous speed that it turned the island entirely upside down +and sailed over it, and he had heard tell that even now people +sailing over the spot could look down into the water and see the +roots of the trees and the cellars of the houses. + +Captain Sanderson now put his pipe back into his mouth, and +Captain Burress took out his pipe. + +"I was once in an obelisk-ship," said he, "that used to trade +regular between Egypt and New York, carrying obelisks. We had a +big obelisk on board. The way they ship obelisks is to make a +hole in the stern of the ship, and run the obelisk in, p'inted +end foremost; and this obelisk filled up nearly the whole of +that ship from stern to bow. We was about ten days out, and +sailing afore a northeast gale with the engines at full speed, +when suddenly we spied breakers ahead, and our Captain saw we was +about to run on a bank. Now if we hadn't had an obelisk on board +we might have sailed over that bank, but the captain knew that +with an obelisk on board we drew too much water for this, and +that we'd be wrecked in about fifty-five seconds if something +wasn't done quick. So he had to do something quick, and this is +what he did: He ordered all steam on, and drove slam-bang on +that bank. Just as he expected, we stopped so suddint that that +big obelisk bounced for'ard, its p'inted end foremost, and went +clean through the bow and shot out into the sea. The minute it +did that the vessel was so lightened that it rose in the water +and we easily steamed over the bank. There was one man knocked +overboard by the shock when we struck, but as soon as we missed +him we went back after him and we got him all right. You see, +when that obelisk went overboard, its butt-end, which was +heaviest, went down first, and when it touched the bottom it just +stood there, and as it was such a big obelisk there was about +five and a half feet of it stuck out of the water. The man who +was knocked overboard he just swum for that obelisk and he +climbed up the hiryglyphics. It was a mighty fine obelisk, and +the Egyptians had cut their hiryglyphics good and deep, so that +the man could get hand and foot-hold; and when we got to him and +took him off, he was sitting high and dry on the p'inted end of +that obelisk. It was a great pity about the obelisk, for it was +a good obelisk, but as I never heard the company tried to +raise it, I expect it is standing there yet." + +Captain Burress now put his pipe back into his mouth and +looked at Captain Jenkinson, who removed his pipe and said: + +"The queerest thing that ever happened to me was about a +shark. We was off the Banks, and the time of year was July, and +the ice was coming down, and we got in among a lot of it. Not +far away, off our weather bow, there was a little iceberg which +had such a queerness about it that the captain and three men went +in a boat to look at it. The ice was mighty clear ice, and you +could see almost through it, and right inside of it, not more +than three feet above the waterline, and about two feet, or maybe +twenty inches, inside the ice, was a whopping big shark, about +fourteen feet long,--a regular man-eater,--frozen in there hard +and fast. `Bless my soul,' said the captain, `this is a +wonderful curiosity, and I'm going to git him out.' Just then +one of the men said he saw that shark wink, but the captain +wouldn't believe him, for he said that shark was frozen stiff and +hard and couldn't wink. You see, the captain had his own idees +about things, and he knew that whales was warm-blooded and would +freeze if they was shut up in ice, but he forgot that sharks was +not whales and that they're cold-blooded just like toads. And +there is toads that has been shut up in rocks for thousands of +years, and they stayed alive, no matter how cold the place was, +because they was cold-blooded, and when the rocks was split, out +hopped the frog. But, as I said before, the captain forgot +sharks was cold-blooded, and he determined to git that one +out. + +"Now you both know, being housekeepers, that if you take a +needle and drive it into a hunk of ice you can split it. The +captain had a sail-needle with him, and so he drove it into the +iceberg right alongside of the shark and split it. Now the +minute he did it he knew that the man was right when he said he +saw the shark wink, for it flopped out of that iceberg quicker +nor a flash of lightning." + +"What a happy fish he must have been!" ejaculated Dorcas, +forgetful of precedent, so great was her emotion. + +"Yes," said Captain Jenkinson, "it was a happy fish enough, +but it wasn't a happy captain. You see, that shark hadn't had +anything to eat, perhaps for a thousand years, until the captain +came along with his sail-needle." + +"Surely you sailormen do see strange things," now said the +widow, "and the strangest thing about them is that they are +true." + +"Yes, indeed," said Dorcas, "that is the most wonderful +thing." + +"You wouldn't suppose," said the Widow Ducket, glancing from +one bench of mariners to the other, "that I have a sea-story to +tell, but I have, and if you like I will tell it to you." + +Captain Bird looked up a little surprised. + +"We would like to hear it--indeed, we would, madam," said he. + +"Ay, ay!" said Captain Burress, and the two other mariners +nodded. + +"It was a good while ago," she said, "when I was living on +the shore near the head of the bay, that my husband was away and +I was left alone in the house. One mornin' my sister-in-law, +who lived on the other side of the bay, sent me word by a boy on +a horse that she hadn't any oil in the house to fill the lamp +that she always put in the window to light her husband home, who +was a fisherman, and if I would send her some by the boy she +would pay me back as soon as they bought oil. The boy said he +would stop on his way home and take the oil to her, but he never +did stop, or perhaps he never went back, and about five o'clock I +began to get dreadfully worried, for I knew if that lamp wasn't +in my sister-in-law's window by dark she might be a widow before +midnight. So I said to myself, `I've got to get that oil to her, +no matter what happens or how it's done.' Of course I couldn't +tell what might happen, but there was only one way it could be +done, and that was for me to get into the boat that was tied to +the post down by the water, and take it to her, for it was too +far for me to walk around by the head of the bay. Now, the +trouble was, I didn't know no more about a boat and the managin' +of it than any one of you sailormen knows about clear starchin'. +But there wasn't no use of thinkin' what I knew and what I didn't +know, for I had to take it to her, and there was no way of doin' +it except in that boat. So I filled a gallon can, for I thought +I might as well take enough while I was about it, and I went down +to the water and I unhitched that boat and I put the oil-can into +her, and then I got in, and off I started, and when I was about a +quarter of a mile from the shore--" + +"Madam," interrupted Captain Bird, "did you row or--or was +there a sail to the boat?" + +The widow looked at the questioner for a moment. "No," +said she, "I didn't row. I forgot to bring the oars from the +house; but it didn't matter, for I didn't know how to use them, +and if there had been a sail I couldn't have put it up, for I +didn't know how to use it, either. I used the rudder to make the +boat go. The rudder was the only thing I knew anything about. +I'd held a rudder when I was a little girl, and I knew how to +work it. So I just took hold of the handle of the rudder and +turned it round and round, and that made the boat go ahead, you +know, and--" + +"Madam!" exclaimed Captain Bird, and the other elderly +mariners took their pipes from their mouths. + +"Yes, that is the way I did it," continued the widow, +briskly. "Big steamships are made to go by a propeller turning +round and round at their back ends, and I made the rudder work in +the same way, and I got along very well, too, until suddenly, +when I was about a quarter of a mile from the shore, a most +terrible and awful storm arose. There must have been a typhoon +or a cyclone out at sea, for the waves came up the bay bigger +than houses, and when they got to the head of the bay they turned +around and tried to get out to sea again. So in this way they +continually met, and made the most awful and roarin' pilin' up of +waves that ever was known. + +"My little boat was pitched about as if it had been a feather +in a breeze, and when the front part of it was cleavin' itself +down into the water the hind part was stickin' up until the +rudder whizzed around like a patent churn with no milk in it. +The thunder began to roar and the lightnin' flashed, and three +seagulls, so nearly frightened to death that they began to turn +up the whites of their eyes, flew down and sat on one of the +seats of the boat, forgettin' in that awful moment that man was +their nat'ral enemy. I had a couple of biscuits in my pocket, +because I had thought I might want a bite in crossing, and I +crumbled up one of these and fed the poor creatures. Then I +began to wonder what I was goin' to do, for things were gettin' +awfuller and awfuller every instant, and the little boat was a- +heavin' and a-pitchin' and a-rollin' and h'istin' itself up, +first on one end and then on the other, to such an extent that if +I hadn't kept tight hold of the rudder-handle I'd slipped off the +seat I was sittin' on. + +"All of a sudden I remembered that oil in the can; but just +as I was puttin' my fingers on the cork my conscience smote me. +`Am I goin' to use this oil,' I said to myself, `and let my +sister-in-law's husband be wrecked for want of it?' And then I +thought that he wouldn't want it all that night, and perhaps they +would buy oil the next day, and so I poured out about a +tumblerful of it on the water, and I can just tell you sailormen +that you never saw anything act as prompt as that did. In three +seconds, or perhaps five, the water all around me, for the +distance of a small front yard, was just as flat as a table and +as smooth as glass, and so invitin' in appearance that the three +gulls jumped out of the boat and began to swim about on it, +primin' their feathers and lookin' at themselves in the +transparent depths, though I must say that one of them made an +awful face as he dipped his bill into the water and tasted +kerosene. + +"Now I had time to sit quiet in the midst of the placid space +I had made for myself, and rest from workin' of the rudder. +Truly it was a wonderful and marvellous thing to look at. The +waves was roarin' and leapin' up all around me higher than the +roof of this house, and sometimes their tops would reach over so +that they nearly met and shut out all view of the stormy sky, +which seemed as if it was bein' torn to pieces by blazin' +lightnin', while the thunder pealed so tremendous that it almost +drowned the roar of the waves. Not only above and all around me +was every thing terrific and fearful, but even under me it was +the same, for there was a big crack in the bottom of the boat as +wide as my hand, and through this I could see down into the water +beneath, and there was--" + +"Madam!" ejaculated Captain Bird, the hand which had been +holding his pipe a few inches from his mouth now dropping to his +knee; and at this motion the hands which held the pipes of the +three other mariners dropped to their knees. + +"Of course it sounds strange," continued the widow, "but I +know that people can see down into clear water, and the water +under me was clear, and the crack was wide enough for me to see +through, and down under me was sharks and swordfishes and other +horrible water creatures, which I had never seen before, all +driven into the bay, I haven't a doubt, by the violence of the +storm out at sea. The thought of my bein' upset and fallin' in +among those monsters made my very blood run cold, and +involuntary-like I began to turn the handle of the rudder, and in +a moment I shot into a wall of ragin' sea-water that was towerin' +around me. For a second I was fairly blinded and stunned, but I +had the cork out of that oil-can in no time, and very soon--you'd +scarcely believe it if I told you how soon--I had another placid +mill-pond surroundin' of me. I sat there a-pantin' and fannin' +with my straw hat, for you'd better believe I was flustered, and +then I began to think how long it would take me to make a line of +mill-ponds clean across the head of the bay, and how much oil it +would need, and whether I had enough. So I sat and calculated +that if a tumblerful of oil would make a smooth place about seven +yards across, which I should say was the width of the one I was +in,--which I calculated by a measure of my eye as to how many +breadths of carpet it would take to cover it,--and if the bay was +two miles across betwixt our house and my sister-in-law's, and, +although I couldn't get the thing down to exact figures, I saw +pretty soon that I wouldn't have oil enough to make a level +cuttin' through all those mountainous billows, and besides, even +if I had enough to take me across, what would be the good of +goin' if there wasn't any oil left to fill my sister-in-law's +lamp? + +"While I was thinkin' and calculatin' a perfectly dreadful +thing happened, which made me think if I didn't get out of this +pretty soon I'd find myself in a mighty risky predicament. The +oil-can, which I had forgotten to put the cork in, toppled over, +and before I could grab it every drop of the oil ran into the +hind part of the boat, where it was soaked up by a lot of dry +dust that was there. No wonder my heart sank when I saw this. +Glancin' wildly around me, as people will do when they are +scared, I saw the smooth place I was in gettin' smaller and +smaller, for the kerosene was evaporatin', as it will do even off +woollen clothes if you give it time enough. The first pond I had +come out of seemed to be covered up, and the great, towerin', +throbbin' precipice of sea-water was a-closin' around me. + +"Castin' down my eyes in despair, I happened to look through +the crack in the bottom of the boat, and oh, what a blessed +relief it was! for down there everything was smooth and still, +and I could see the sand on the bottom, as level and hard, no +doubt, as it was on the beach. Suddenly the thought struck me +that that bottom would give me the only chance I had of gettin' +out of the frightful fix I was in. If I could fill that oil-can +with air, and then puttin' it under my arm and takin' a long +breath if I could drop down on that smooth bottom, I might run +along toward shore, as far as I could, and then, when I felt my +breath was givin' out, I could take a pull at the oil-can and +take another run, and then take another pull and another run, and +perhaps the can would hold air enough for me until I got near +enough to shore to wade to dry land. To be sure, the sharks and +other monsters were down there, but then they must have been +awfully frightened, and perhaps they might not remember that man +was their nat'ral enemy. Anyway, I thought it would be better to +try the smooth water passage down there than stay and be +swallowed up by the ragin' waves on top. + +"So I blew the can full of air and corked it, and then I tore +up some of the boards from the bottom of the boat so as to make a +hole big enough for me to get through,--and you sailormen needn't +wriggle so when I say that, for you all know a divin'-bell hasn't +any bottom at all and the water never comes in,--and so when I +got the hole big enough I took the oil-can under my arm, and +was just about to slip down through it when I saw an awful turtle +a-walkin' through the sand at the bottom. Now, I might trust +sharks and swordfishes and sea-serpents to be frightened and +forget about their nat'ral enemies, but I never could trust a +gray turtle as big as a cart, with a black neck a yard long, with +yellow bags to its jaws, to forget anything or to remember +anything. I'd as lieve get into a bath-tub with a live crab as +to go down there. It wasn't of no use even so much as thinkin' +of it, so I gave up that plan and didn't once look through that +hole again." + +"And what did you do, madam?" asked Captain Bird, who was +regarding her with a face of stone. + +"I used electricity," she said. "Now don't start as if you +had a shock of it. That's what I used. When I was younger than +I was then, and sometimes visited friends in the city, we often +amused ourselves by rubbing our feet on the carpet until we got +ourselves so full of electricity that we could put up our fingers +and light the gas. So I said to myself that if I could get full +of electricity for the purpose of lightin' the gas I could get +full of it for other purposes, and so, without losin' a moment, I +set to work. I stood up on one of the seats, which was dry, and +I rubbed the bottoms of my shoes backward and forward on it with +such violence and swiftness that they pretty soon got warm and I +began fillin' with electricity, and when I was fully charged with +it from my toes to the top of my head, I just sprang into the +water and swam ashore. Of course I couldn't sink, bein' full of +electricity." + +Captain Bird heaved a long sigh and rose to his feet, +whereupon the other mariners rose to their feet "Madam," said +Captain Bird, "what's to pay for the supper and--the rest of the +entertainment?" + +"The supper is twenty-five cents apiece," said the Widow +Ducket, "and everything else is free, gratis." + +Whereupon each mariner put his hand into his trousers pocket, +pulled out a silver quarter, and handed it to the widow. Then, +with four solemn "Good evenin's," they went out to the front +gate. + +"Cast off, Captain Jenkinson," said Captain Bird, "and you, +Captain Burress, clew him up for'ard. You can stay in the bow, +Captain Sanderson, and take the sheet-lines. I'll go aft." + +All being ready, each of the elderly mariners clambered over +a wheel, and having seated themselves, they prepared to lay their +course for Cuppertown. + +But just as they were about to start, Captain Jenkinson asked +that they lay to a bit, and clambering down over his wheel, he +reentered the front gate and went up to the door of the house, +where the widow and Dorcas were still standing. + +"Madam," said he, "I just came back to ask what became of +your brother-in-law through his wife's not bein' able to put no +light in the window?" + +"The storm drove him ashore on our side of the bay," said +she, "and the next mornin' he came up to our house, and I told +him all that had happened to me. And when he took our boat and +went home and told that story to his wife, she just packed up and +went out West, and got divorced from him. And it served him +right, too." + +"Thank you, ma'am," said Captain Jenkinson, and going out +of the gate, he clambered up over the wheel, and the wagon +cleared for Cuppertown. + +When the elderly mariners were gone, the Widow Ducket, still +standing in the door, turned to Dorcas. + +"Think of it!" she said. "To tell all that to me, in my own +house! And after I had opened my one jar of brandied peaches, +that I'd been keepin' for special company!" + +"In your own house!" ejaculated Dorcas. "And not one of them +brandied peaches left!" + +The widow jingled the four quarters in her hand before she +slipped them into her pocket. + +"Anyway, Dorcas," she remarked, "I think we can now say we +are square with all the world, and so let's go in and wash the +dishes." + +"Yes," said Dorcas, "we're square." + + + + CAPTAIN ELI'S BEST EAR + + +The little seaside village of Sponkannis lies so quietly upon a +protected spot on our Atlantic coast that it makes no more stir +in the world than would a pebble which, held between one's finger +and thumb, should be dipped below the surface of a millpond and +then dropped. About the post-office and the store--both under +the same roof--the greater number of the houses cluster, as if +they had come for their week's groceries, or were waiting for the +mail, while toward the west the dwellings become fewer and fewer, +until at last the village blends into a long stretch of sandy +coast and scrubby pine-woods. Eastward the village ends abruptly +at the foot of a windswept bluff, on which no one cares to build. + +Among the last houses in the western end of the village stood +two neat, substantial dwellings, one belonging to Captain Eli +Bunker, and the other to Captain Cephas Dyer. These householders +were two very respectable retired mariners, the first a widower +about fifty, and the other a bachelor of perhaps the same age, a +few years more or less making but little difference in this +region of weather-beaten youth and seasoned age. + +Each of these good captains lived alone, and each took +entire charge of his own domestic affairs, not because he was +poor, but because it pleased him to do so. When Captain Eli +retired from the sea he was the owner of a good vessel, which he +sold at a fair profit; and Captain Cephas had made money in many +a voyage before he built his house in Sponkannis and settled +there. + +When Captain Eli's wife was living she was his household +manager. But Captain Cephas had never had a woman in his house, +except during the first few months of his occupancy, when certain +female neighbors came in occasionally to attend to little matters +of cleaning which, according to popular notions, properly belong +to the sphere of woman. + +But Captain Cephas soon put an end to this sort of thing. He +did not like a woman's ways, especially her ways of attending to +domestic affairs. He liked to live in sailor fashion, and to +keep house in sailor fashion. In his establishment everything +was shipshape, and everything which could be stowed away was +stowed away, and, if possible, in a bunker. The floors were +holystoned nearly every day, and the whole house was repainted +about twice a year, a little at a time, when the weather was +suitable for this marine recreation. Things not in frequent use +were lashed securely to the walls, or perhaps put out of the way +by being hauled up to the ceiling by means of blocks and tackle. +His cooking was done sailor fashion, like everything else, and he +never failed to have plum-duff on Sunday. His well was near his +house, and every morning he dropped into it a lead and line, and +noted down the depth of water. Three times a day he entered in a +little note-book the state of the weather, the height of the +mercury in barometer and thermometer, the direction of the wind, +and special weather points when necessary. + +Captain Eli managed his domestic affairs in an entirely +different way. He kept house woman fashion--not, however, in the +manner of an ordinary woman, but after the manner of his late +wife, Miranda Bunker, now dead some seven years. Like his +friend, Captain Cephas, he had had the assistance of his female +neighbors during the earlier days of his widowerhood. But he +soon found that these women did not do things as Miranda used to +do them, and, although he frequently suggested that they should +endeavor to imitate the methods of his late consort, they did not +even try to do things as she used to do them, preferring their +own ways. Therefore it was that Captain Eli determined to keep +house by himself, and to do it, as nearly as his nature would +allow, as Miranda used to do it. He swept his doors and he shook +his door-mats; he washed his paint with soap and hot water; he +dusted his furniture with a soft cloth, which he afterwards stuck +behind a chest of drawers. He made his bed very neatly, turning +down the sheet at the top, and setting the pillow upon edge, +smoothing it carefully after he had done so. His cooking was +based on the methods of the late Miranda. He had never been able +to make bread rise properly, but he had always liked ship- +biscuit, and he now greatly preferred them to the risen bread +made by his neighbors. And as to coffee and the plainer articles +of food with which he furnished his table, even Miranda herself +would not have objected to them had she been alive and very +hungry. + +The houses of the two captains were not very far apart, +and they were good neighbors, often smoking their pipes together +and talking of the sea. But this was always on the little porch +in front of Captain Cephas's house, or by his kitchen fire in the +winter. Captain Eli did not like the smell of tobacco smoke in +his house, or even in front of it in summer-time, when the doors +were open. He had no objection himself to the odor of tobacco, +but it was contrary to the principles of woman housekeeping that +rooms should smell of it, and he was always true to those +principles. + +It was late in a certain December, and through the village +there was a pleasant little flutter of Christmas preparations. +Captain Eli had been up to the store, and he had stayed there a +good while, warming himself by the stove, and watching the women +coming in to buy things for Christmas. It was strange how many +things they bought for presents or for holiday use--fancy soap +and candy, handkerchiefs and little woollen shawls for old +people, and a lot of pretty little things which he knew the use +of, but which Captain Cephas would never have understood at all +had he been there. + +As Captain Eli came out of the store he saw a cart in which +were two good-sized Christmas trees, which had been cut in the +woods, and were going, one to Captain Holmes's house, and the +other to Mother Nelson's. Captain Holmes had grandchildren, and +Mother Nelson, with never a child of her own, good old soul, had +three little orphan nieces who never wanted for anything needful +at Christmas-time or any other time. + +Captain Eli walked home very slowly, taking observations in +his mind. It was more than seven years since he had had +anything to do with Christmas, except that on that day he had +always made himself a mince-pie, the construction and the +consumption of which were equally difficult. It is true that +neighbors had invited him, and they had invited Captain Cephas, +to their Christmas dinners, but neither of these worthy seamen +had ever accepted any of these invitations. Even holiday food, +when not cooked in sailor fashion, did not agree with Captain +Cephas, and it would have pained the good heart of Captain Eli if +he had been forced to make believe to enjoy a Christmas dinner so +very inferior to those which Miranda used to set before him. + +But now the heart of Captain Eli was gently moved by a +Christmas flutter. It had been foolish, perhaps, for him to go +up to the store at such a time as this, but the mischief had been +done. Old feelings had come back to him, and he would be glad to +celebrate Christmas this year if he could think of any good way +to do it. And the result of his mental observations was that he +went over to Captain Cephas's house to talk to him about it. + +Captain Cephas was in his kitchen, smoking his third morning +pipe. Captain Eli filled his pipe, lighted it, and sat down by +the fire. + +"Cap'n," said he, "what do you say to our keepin Christmas +this year? A Christmas dinner is no good if it's got to be eat +alone, and you and me might eat ourn together. It might be in my +house, or it might be in your house--it won't make no great +difference to me which. Of course, I like woman housekeepin', as +is laid down in the rules of service fer my house. But next best +to that I like sailor housekeepin', so I don't mind which +house the dinner is in, Cap'n Cephas, so it suits you." + +Captain Cephas took his pipe from his mouth. "You're pretty +late thinkin' about it," said he, "fer day after to-morrow's +Christmas." + +"That don't make no difference," said Captain Eli. "What +things we want that are not in my house or your house we can +easily get either up at the store or else in the woods." + +"In the woods!" exclaimed Captain Cephas. "What in the name +of thunder do you expect to get in the woods for Christmas?" + +"A Christmas tree," said Captain Eli. "I thought it might be +a nice thing to have a Christmas tree fer Christmas. Cap'n +Holmes has got one, and Mother Nelson's got another. I guess +nearly everybody's got one. It won't cost anything--I can go and +cut it." + +Captain Cephas grinned a grin, as if a great leak had been +sprung in the side of a vessel, stretching nearly from stem to +stern. + +"A Christmas tree!" he exclaimed. "Well, I am blessed! But +look here, Cap'n Eli. You don't know what a Christmas tree's +fer. It's fer children, and not fer grown-ups. Nobody ever does +have a Christmas tree in any house where there ain't no +children." + +Captain Eli rose and stood with his back to the fire. "I +didn't think of that," he said, "but I guess it's so. And when I +come to think of it, a Christmas isn't much of a Christmas, +anyway, without children." + +"You never had none," said Captain Cephas, "and you've kept +Christmas." + +"Yes," replied Captain Eli, reflectively, "we did do it, +but there was always a lackment--Miranda has said so, and I have +said so." + +"You didn't have no Christmas tree," said Captain Cephas. + +"No, we didn't. But I don't think that folks was as much set +on Christmas trees then as they 'pear to be now. I wonder," he +continued, thoughtfully gazing at the ceiling, "if we was to fix +up a Christmas tree--and you and me's got a lot of pretty things +that we've picked up all over the world, that would go miles +ahead of anything that could be bought at the store fer Christmas +trees--if we was to fix up a tree real nice, if we couldn't get +some child or other that wasn't likely to have a tree to come in +and look at it, and stay awhile, and make Christmas more like +Christmas. And then, when it went away, it could take along the +things that was hangin' on the tree, and keep 'em fer its own." + +"That wouldn't work," said Captain Cephas. "If you get a +child into this business, you must let it hang up its stockin' +before it goes to bed, and find it full in the mornin', and then +tell it an all-fired lie about Santa Claus if it asks any +questions. Most children think more of stockin's than they do of +trees--so I've heard, at least." + +"I've got no objections to stockin's," said Captain Eli. "If +it wanted to hang one up, it could hang one up either here or in +my house, wherever we kept Christmas." + +"You couldn't keep a child all night," sardonically remarked +Captain Cephas, "and no more could I. Fer if it was to get up a +croup in the night, it would be as if we was on a lee shore with +anchors draggin' and a gale a-blowin'." + +"That's so," said Captain Eli. "You've put it fair. I +suppose if we did keep a child all night, we'd have to have some +sort of a woman within hail in case of a sudden blow." + +Captain Cephas sniffed. "What's the good of talkin'?" said +he. "There ain't no child, and there ain't no woman that you +could hire to sit all night on my front step or on your front +step, a-waitin' to be piped on deck in case of croup." + +"No," said Captain Eli. "I don't suppose there's any child +in this village that ain't goin' to be provided with a Christmas +tree or a Christmas stockin', or perhaps both--except, now I come +to think of it, that little gal that was brought down here with +her mother last summer, and has been kept by Mrs. Crumley sence +her mother died." + +"And won't be kept much longer," said Captain Cephas, "fer +I've hearn Mrs. Crumley say she couldn't afford it." + +"That's so," said Captain Eli. "If she can't afford to keep +the little gal, she can't afford to give no Christmas trees nor +stockin's, and so it seems to me, cap'n, that that little gal +would be a pretty good child to help us keep Christmas." + +"You're all the time forgettin'," said the other, "that +nuther of us can keep a child all night." + +Captain Eli seated himself, and looked ponderingly into the +fire. "You're right, cap'n," said he. "We'd have to ship some +woman to take care of her. Of course, it wouldn't be no use to +ask Mrs. Crumley?" + +Captain Cephas laughed. "I should say not." + +"And there doesn't seem to be anybody else," said his +companion. "Can you think of anybody, cap'n?" + +"There ain't anybody to think of," replied Captain Cephas, +"unless it might be Eliza Trimmer. She's generally ready enough +to do anything that turns up. But she wouldn't be no good--her +house is too far away for either you or me to hail her in case a +croup came up suddint." + +"That's so," said Captain Eli. "She does live a long way off." + +"So that settles the whole business," said Captain Cephas. +"She's too far away to come if wanted, and nuther of us couldn't +keep no child without somebody to come if they was wanted, and +it's no use to have a Christmas tree without a child. A +Christmas without a Christmas tree don't seem agreeable to you, +cap'n, so I guess we'd better get along just the same as we've +been in the habit of doin', and eat our Christmas dinner, as we +do our other meals in our own houses." + +Captain Eli looked into the fire. "I don't like to give up +things if I can help it. That was always my way. If wind and +tide's ag'in' me, I can wait till one or the other, or both of +them, serve." + + "Yes," said Captain Cephas, "you was always that kind of a +man." + +"That's so. But it does 'pear to me as if I'd have to give +up this time, though it's a pity to do it, on account of the +little gal, fer she ain't likely to have any Christmas this year. + +She's a nice little gal, and takes as natural to navigation as if +she'd been born at sea. I've given her two or three things +because she's so pretty, but there's nothing she likes so much as +a little ship I gave her." + +"Perhaps she was born at sea," remarked Captain Cephas. + +"Perhaps she was," said the other; "and that makes it the +bigger pity." + +For a few moments nothing was said. Then Captain Eli +suddenly exclaimed, "I'll tell you what we might do, cap'n! We +might ask Mrs. Trimmer to lend a hand in givin' the little gal a +Christmas. She ain't got nobody in her house but herself, and I +guess she'd be glad enough to help give that little gal a regular +Christmas. She could go and get the child, and bring her to your +house or to my house, or wherever we're goin' to keep Christmas, +and--" + +"Well," said Captain Cephas, with an air of scrutinizing +inquiry, "what?" + +"Well," replied the other, a little hesitatingly, "so far as +I'm concerned,--that is, I don't mind one way or the other,--she +might take her Christmas dinner along with us and the little gal, +and then she could fix her stockin' to be hung up, and help with +the Christmas tree, and--" + +"Well," demanded Captain Cephas, "what?" + +"Well," said Captain Eli, "she could--that is, it doesn't +make any difference to me one way or the other--she might stay +all night at whatever house we kept Christmas in, and then you +and me might spend the night in the other house, and then she +could be ready there to help the child in the mornin', when she +came to look at her stockin'." + +Captain Cephas fixed upon his friend an earnest glare. +"That's pretty considerable of an idea to come upon you so +suddint," said he. "But I can tell you one thing: there ain't a- +goin' to be any such doin's in my house. If you choose to come +over here to sleep, and give up your house to any woman you can +find to take care of the little gal, all right. But the +thing can't be done here." + +There was a certain severity in these remarks, but they +appeared to affect Captain Eli very pleasantly. + +"Well," said he, "if you're satisfied, I am. I'll agree to +any plan you choose to make. It doesn't matter to me which house +it's in, and if you say my house, I say my house. All I want is +to make the business agreeable to all concerned. Now it's time +fer me to go to my dinner, and this afternoon we'd better go and +try to get things straightened out, because the little gal, and +whatever woman comes with her, ought to be at my house to-morrow +before dark. S'posin' we divide up this business: I'll go and +see Mrs. Crumley about the little gal, and you can go and see +Mrs. Trimmer." + +"No, sir," promptly replied Captain Cephas, "I don't go to +see no Mrs. Trimmer. You can see both of them just the same as +you can see one--they're all along the same way. I'll go cut the +Christmas tree." + +"All right," said Captain Eli. "It don't make no difference +to me which does which. But if I was you, cap'n, I'd cut a good +big tree, because we might as well have a good one while we're +about it." + +When he had eaten his dinner, and washed up his dishes, and +had put everything away in neat, housewifely order, Captain Eli +went to Mrs. Crumley's house, and very soon finished his business +there. Mrs. Crumley kept the only house which might be +considered a boarding-house in the village of Sponkannis; and +when she had consented to take charge of the little girl who had +been left on her hands she had hoped it would not be very long +before she would hear from some of her relatives in regard to +her maintenance. But she had heard nothing, and had now ceased +to expect to hear anything, and in consequence had frequently +remarked that she must dispose of the child some way or other, +for she couldn't afford to keep her any longer. Even an absence +of a day or two at the house of the good captain would be some +relief, and Mrs. Crumley readily consented to the Christmas +scheme. As to the little girl, she was delighted. She already +looked upon Captain Eli as her best friend in the world. + +It was not so easy to go to Mrs. Trimmer's house and put the +business before her. "It ought to be plain sailin' enough," +Captain Eli said to himself, over and over again, "but, fer all +that, it don't seem to be plain sailin'." + +But he was not a man to be deterred by difficult navigation, +and he walked straight to Eliza Trimmer's house. + +Mrs. Trimmer was a comely woman about thirty-five, who had +come to the village a year before, and had maintained herself, or +at least had tried to, by dressmaking and plain sewing. She had +lived at Stetford, a seaport about twenty miles away, and from +there, three years before, her husband, Captain Trimmer, had +sailed away in a good-sized schooner, and had never returned. +She had come to Sponkannis because she thought that there she +could live cheaper and get more work than in her former home. +She had found the first quite possible, but her success in regard +to the work had not been very great. + +When Captain Eli entered Mrs. Trimmer's little room, he found +her busy mending a sail. Here fortune favored him. "You +turn your hand to 'most anything, Mrs. Trimmer," said he, after +he had greeted her. + +"Oh, yes," she answered, with a smile, "I am obliged to do +that. Mending sails is pretty heavy work, but it's better than +nothing." + +"I had a notion," said he, "that you was ready to turn your +hand to any good kind of business, so I thought I would step in +and ask you if you'd turn your hand to a little bit of business +I've got on the stocks." + +She stopped sewing on the sail, and listened while Captain +Eli laid his plan before her. "It's very kind in you and Captain +Cephas to think of all that," said she. "I have often noticed +that poor little girl, and pitied her. Certainly I'll come, and +you needn't say anything about paying me for it. I wouldn't +think of asking to be paid for doing a thing like that. And +besides,"--she smiled again as she spoke,--"if you are going to +give me a Christmas dinner, as you say, that will make things +more than square." + +Captain Eli did not exactly agree with her, but he was in +very good humor, and she was in good humor, and the matter was +soon settled, and Mrs. Trimmer promised to come to the captain's +house in the morning and help about the Christmas tree, and in +the afternoon to go to get the little girl from Mrs. Crumley's +and bring her to the house. + +Captain Eli was delighted with the arrangements. "Things now +seem to be goin' along before a spankin' breeze,"said he. "But I +don't know about the dinner. I guess you will have to leave that +to me. I don't believe Captain Cephas could eat a woman- +cooked dinner. He's accustomed to livin sailor fashion, you +know, and he has declared over and over again to me that woman- +cookin' doesn't agree with him." + +"But I can cook sailor fashion," said Mrs. Trimmer,--"just as +much sailor fashion as you or Captain Cephas, and if he don't +believe it, I'll prove it to him; so you needn't worry about +that." + +When the captain had gone, Mrs. Trimmer gayly put away the +sail. There was no need to finish it in a hurry, and no knowing +when she would get her money for it when it was done. No one had +asked her to a Christmas dinner that year, and she had expected +to have a lonely time of it. But it would be very pleasant to +spend Christmas with the little girl and the two good captains. +Instead of sewing any more on the sail, she got out some of her +own clothes to see if they needed anything done to them. + +The next morning Mrs. Trimmer went to Captain Eli's house, +and finding Captain Cephas there, they all set to work at the +Christmas tree, which was a very fine one, and had been planted +in a box. Captain Cephas had brought over a bundle of things +from his house, and Captain Eli kept running here and there, +bringing, each time that he returned, some new object, wonderful +or pretty, which he had brought from China or Japan or Corea, or +some spicy island of the Eastern seas; and nearly every time he +came with these treasures Mrs. Trimmer declared that such things +were too good to put upon a Christmas tree, even for such a nice +little girl as the one for which that tree was intended. The +presents which Captain Cephas brought were much more suitable for +the purpose; they were odd and funny, and some of them pretty, +but not expensive, as were the fans and bits of shellwork and +carved ivories which Captain Eli wished to tie upon the twigs of +the tree. + +There was a good deal of talk about all this, but Captain Eli +had his own way. + +"I don't suppose, after all," said he, "that the little gal +ought to have all the things. This is such a big tree that it's +more like a family tree. Cap'n Cephas can take some of my +things, and I can take some of his things, and, Mrs. Trimmer, if +there's anything you like, you can call it your present and take +it for your own, so that will be fair and comfortable all round. +What I want is to make everybody satisfied." + +"I'm sure I think they ought to be," said Mrs. Trimmer, +looking very kindly at Captain Eli. + +Mrs. Trimmer went home to her own house to dinner, and in the +afternoon she brought the little girl. She had said there ought +to be an early supper, so that the child would have time to enjoy +the Christmas tree before she became sleepy. + +This meal was prepared entirely by Captain Eli, and in sailor +fashion, not woman fashion, so that Captain Cephas could make no +excuse for eating his supper at home. Of course they all ought +to be together the whole of that Christmas eve. As for the big +dinner on the morrow, that was another affair, for Mrs. Trimmer +undertook to make Captain Cephas understand that she had always +cooked for Captain Trimmer in sailor fashion, and if he objected +to her plum-duff, or if anybody else objected to her mince-pie, +she was going to be very much surprised. + +Captain Cephas ate his supper with a good relish, and was +still eating when the rest had finished. As to the Christmas +tree, it was the most valuable, if not the most beautiful, that +had ever been set up in that region. It had no candles upon it, +but was lighted by three lamps and a ship's lantern placed in the +four corners of the room, and the little girl was as happy as if +the tree were decorated with little dolls and glass balls. Mrs. +Trimmer was intensely pleased and interested to see the child so +happy, and Captain Eli was much pleased and interested to see the +child and Mrs. Trimmer so happy, and Captain Cephas was +interested, and perhaps a little amused in a superior fashion, to +see Captain Eli and Mrs. Trimmer and the little child so happy. + +Then the distribution of the presents began. Captain Eli +asked Captain Cephas if he might have the wooden pipe that the +latter had brought for his present. Captain Cephas said he might +take it, for all he cared, and be welcome to it. Then Captain +Eli gave Captain Cephas a red bandanna handkerchief of a very +curious pattern, and Captain Cephas thanked him kindly. After +which Captain Eli bestowed upon Mrs. Trimmer a most beautiful +tortoise-shell comb, carved and cut and polished in a wonderful +way, and with it he gave a tortoise-shell fan, carved in the same +fashion, because he said the two things seemed to belong to each +other and ought to go together; and he would not listen to one +word of what Mrs. Trimmer said about the gifts being too good for +her, and that she was not likely ever to use them. + +"It seems to me," said Captain Cephas, "that you might be +giving something to the little gal." + +Then Captain Eli remembered that the child ought not to be +forgotten, and her soul was lifted into ecstasy by many +gifts, some of which Mrs. Trimmer declared were too good for any +child in this wide, wide world. But Captain Eli answered that +they could be taken care of by somebody until the little girl was +old enough to know their value. + +Then it was discovered that, unbeknown to anybody else, Mrs. +Trimmer had put some presents on the tree, which were things +which had been brought by Captain Trimmer from somewhere in the +far East or the distant West. These she bestowed upon Captain +Cephas and Captain Eli. And the end of all this was that in the +whole of Sponkannis, from the foot of the bluff to the east, to +the very last house on the shore to the west, there was not one +Christmas eve party so happy as this one. + +Captain Cephas was not quite so happy as the three others +were, but he was very much interested. About nine o'clock the +party broke up, and the two captains put on their caps and +buttoned up their pea-jackets, and started for Captain Cephas's +house, but not before Captain Eli had carefully fastened every +window and every door except the front door, and had told Mrs. +Trimmer how to fasten that when they had gone, and had given her +a boatswain's whistle, which she might blow out of the window if +there should be a sudden croup and it should be necessary for any +one to go anywhere. He was sure he could hear it, for the wind +was exactly right for him to hear a whistle from his house. When +they had gone Mrs. Trimmer put the little girl to bed, and was +delighted to find in what a wonderfully neat and womanlike +fashion that house was kept. + +It was nearly twelve o'clock that night when Captain Eli, +sleeping in his bunk opposite that of Captain Cephas, was aroused +by hearing a sound. He had been lying with his best ear +uppermost, so that he should hear anything if there happened to +be anything to hear. He did hear something, but it was not a +boatswain's whistle; it was a prolonged cry, and it seemed to +come from the sea. + +In a moment Captain Eli was sitting on the side of his bunk, +listening intently. Again came the cry. The window toward the +sea was slightly open, and he heard it plainly. + +"Cap'n! " said he, and at the word Captain Cephas was sitting +on the side of his bunk, listening. He knew from his companion's +attitude, plainly visible in the light of a lantern which hung on +a hook at the other end of the room, that he had been awakened to +listen. Again came the cry. + +"That's distress at sea," said Captain Cephas. "Harken!" + +They listened again for nearly a minute, when the cry was +repeated. + +"Bounce on deck, boys!" said Captain Cephas, getting out on +the floor. "There's some one in distress off shore." + +Captain Eli jumped to the floor, and began to dress quickly. + +"It couldn't be a call from land?" he asked hurriedly. "It +don't sound a bit to you like a boatswain's whistle, does it?" + +"No," said Captain Cephas, disdainfully. "It's a call from +sea." Then, seizing a lantern, he rushed down the companionway. + +As soon as he was convinced that it was a call from sea, +Captain Eli was one in feeling and action with Captain Cephas. +The latter hastily opened the draughts of the kitchen stove, and +put on some wood, and by the time this was done Captain Eli had +the kettle filled and on the stove. Then they clapped on their +caps and their pea-jackets, each took an oar from a corner in the +back hall, and together they ran down to the beach. + +The night was dark, but not very cold, and Captain Cephas had +been to the store that morning in his boat. + +Whenever he went to the store, and the weather permitted, he +rowed there in his boat rather than walk. At the bow of the +boat, which was now drawn up on the sand, the two men stood and +listened. Again came the cry from the sea. + +"It's something ashore on the Turtle-back Shoal," said +Captain Cephas. + +"Yes," said Captain Eli, "and it's some small craft, fer that +cry is down pretty nigh to the water." + +"Yes," said Captain Cephas. "And there's only one man +aboard, or else they'd take turns a-hollerin'." + +"He's a stranger," said Captain Eli, "or he wouldn't have +tried, even with a cat-boat, to get in over that shoal on ebb- +tide." + +As they spoke they ran the boat out into the water and jumped +in, each with an oar. Then they pulled for the Turtle-back +Shoal. + +Although these two captains were men of fifty or thereabout, +they were as strong and tough as any young fellows in the +village, and they pulled with steady strokes, and sent the heavy +boat skimming over the water, not in a straight line toward the +Turtle-back Shoal, but now a few points in the darkness this +way, and now a few points in the darkness that way, then with a +great curve to the south through the dark night, keeping always +near the middle of the only good channel out of the bay when the +tide was ebbing. + +Now the cries from seaward had ceased, but the two captains +were not discouraged. + +"He's heard the thumpin' of our oars," said Captain Cephas. + +"He's listenin', and he'll sing out again if he thinks we're +goin' wrong," said Captain Eli. "Of course he doesn't know +anything about that." + +And so when they made the sweep to the south the cry came +again, and Captain Eli grinned. "We needn't to spend no breath +hollerin'," said he. "He'll hear us makin' fer him in a minute." + +When they came to head for the shoal they lay on their oars +for a moment, while Captain Cephas turned the lantern in the bow, +so that its light shone out ahead. He had not wanted the +shipwrecked person to see the light when it would seem as if the +boat were rowing away from him. He had heard of castaway people +who became so wild when they imagined that a ship or boat was +going away from them that they jumped overboard. + +When the two captains reached the shoal, they found there a +cat-boat aground, with one man aboard. His tale was quickly +told. He had expected to run into the little bay that afternoon, +but the wind had fallen, and in trying to get in after dark, and +being a stranger, he had run aground. If he had not been so +cold, he said, he would have been willing to stay there till the +tide rose; but he was getting chilled, and seeing a light not +far away, he concluded to call for help as long as his voice held +out. + +The two captains did not ask many questions. They helped +anchor the cat-boat, and then they took the man on their boat and +rowed him to shore. He was getting chilled sitting out there +doing nothing, and so when they reached the house they made him +some hot grog, and promised in the morning, when the tide rose, +they would go out and help him bring his boat in. Then Captain +Cephas showed the stranger to a bunk, and they all went to bed. +Such experiences had not enough of novelty to the good captains +to keep them awake five minutes. + +In the morning they were all up very early, and the stranger, +who proved to be a seafaring man with bright blue eyes, said +that, as his cat-boat seemed to be riding all right at its +anchorage, he did not care to go out after her just yet. Any +time during flood-tide would do for him, and he had some business +that he wanted to attend to as soon as possible. + +This suited the two captains very well, for they wished to be +on hand when the little girl discovered her stocking. + +"Can you tell me," said the stranger, as he put on his cap, +"where I can find a Mrs. Trimmer, who lives in this village?" + +At these words all the sturdy stiffness which, from his youth +up, had characterized the legs of Captain Eli entirely went out +of them, and he sat suddenly upon a bench. For a few moments +there was silence. + +Then Captain Cephas, who thought some answer should be made +to the question, nodded his head. + +"I want to see her as soon as I can," said the stranger. "I have +come to see her on particular business that will be a surprise to +her. I wanted to be here before Christmas began, and that's the +reason I took that cat-boat from Stetford, because I thought I'd +come quicker that way than by land. But the wind fell, as I told +you. If either one of you would be good enough to pilot me to +where Mrs. Trimmer lives, or to any point where I can get a sight +of the place, I'd be obliged." + +Captain Eli rose and with hurried but unsteady steps went +into the house (for they had been upon the little piazza), and +beckoned to his friend to follow. The two men stood in the +kitchen and looked at each other. The face of Captain Eli was of +the hue of a clam-shell. + +"Go with him, cap'n," he said in a hoarse whisper. "I can't +do it." + +"To your house?" inquired the other. + +"Of course. Take him to my house. There ain't no other +place where she is. Take him along." + +Captain Cephas's countenance wore an air of the deepest +concern, but he thought that the best thing to do was to +get the stranger away. + + As they walked rapidly toward Captain Eli's house there was +very little said by either Captain Cephas or the stranger. The +latter seemed anxious to give Mrs. Trimmer a surprise, and not to +say anything which might enable another person to interfere with +his project. + +The two men had scarcely stepped upon the piazza when Mrs. +Trimmer, who had been expecting early visitors, opened the door. +She was about to call out "Merry Christmas!" but, her eyes +falling upon a stranger, the words stopped at her lips. +First she turned red, then she turned pale, and Captain Cephas +thought she was about to fall. But before she could do this the +stranger had her in his arms. She opened her eyes, which for a +moment she had closed, and, gazing into his face, she put her +arms around his neck. Then Captain Cephas came away, without +thinking of the little girl and the pleasure she would have in +discovering her Christmas stocking. + +When he had been left alone, Captain Eli sat down near the +kitchen stove, close to the very kettle which he had filled with +water to heat for the benefit of the man he had helped bring in +from the sea, and, with his elbows on his knees and his fingers +in his hair, he darkly pondered. + +"If I'd only slept with my hard-o'-hearin' ear up," he said +to himself, "I'd never have heard it." + +In a few moments his better nature condemned this thought. + +"That's next to murder," he muttered, "fer he couldn't have +kept himself from fallin' asleep out there in the cold, and when +the tide riz held have been blowed out to sea with this wind. If +I hadn't heard him, Captain Cephas never would, fer he wasn't +primed up to wake, as I was." + +But, notwithstanding his better nature, Captain Eli was again +saying to himself, when his friend returned, "If I'd only slept +with my other ear up!" + +Like the honest, straightforward mariner he was, Captain +Cephas made an exact report of the facts. "They was huggin' when +I left them," he said, "and I expect they went indoors pretty +soon, fer it was too cold outside. It's an all-fired shame she +happened to be in your house, cap'n, that's all I've got to +say about it. It's a thunderin' shame." + +Captain Eli made no answer. He still sat with his elbows on +his knees and his hands in his hair. + +"A better course than you laid down fer these Christmas times +was never dotted on a chart," continued Captain Cephas. "From +port of sailin' to port of entry you laid it down clear and fine. +But it seems there was rocks that wasn't marked on the chart." + +"Yes," groaned Captain Eli, "there was rocks." + +Captain Cephas made no attempt to comfort his friend, but +went to work to get breakfast. + +When that meal--a rather silent one--was over, Captain Eli +felt better. "There was rocks," he said, "and not a breaker to +show where they lay, and I struck 'em bow on. So that's the end +of that voyage. But I've tuk to my boats, cap'n, I've tuk to my +boats." + +"I'm glad to hear you've tuk to your boats," said Captain +Cephas, with an approving glance upon his friend. + +About ten minutes afterwards Captain Eli said, "I'm goin' up +to my house." + +"By yourself?" said the other. + +"Yes, by myself. I'd rather go alone. I don't intend to +mind anything, and I'm goin' to tell her that she can stay there +and spend Christmas,--the place she lives in ain't no place to +spend Christmas,--and she can make the little gal have a good +time, and go 'long just as we intended to go 'long--plum-duff and +mince-pie all the same. I can stay here, and you and me can have +our Christmas dinner together, if we choose to give it that name. + +And if she ain't ready to go to-morrow, she can stay a day or +two longer. It's all the same to me, if it's the same to you, +cap'n." + +Captain Cephas having said that it was the same to him, +Captain Eli put on his cap and buttoned up his pea-jacket, +declaring that the sooner he got to his house the better, as she +might be thinking that she would have to move out of it now that +things were different. + +Before Captain Eli reached his house he saw something which +pleased him. He saw the sea-going stranger, with his back toward +him, walking rapidly in the direction of the village store. + +Captain Eli quickly entered his house, and in the doorway of +the room where the tree was he met Mrs. Trimmer, beaming brighter +than any morning sun that ever rose. + +"Merry Christmas!" she exclaimed, holding out both her hands. +"I've been wondering and wondering when you'd come to bid me +`Merry Christmas'--the merriest Christmas I've ever had." + +Captain Eli took her hands and bid her "Merry Christmas" very +gravely. + +She looked a little surprised. "What's the matter, Captain Eli?" +she exclaimed. "You don't seem to say that as if you meant it." + +"Oh, yes, I do," he answered. "This must be an all-fired--I +mean a thunderin' happy Christmas fer you, Mrs. Trimmer." + +"Yes," said she, her face beaming again. "And to think that +it should happen on Christmas day--that this blessed morning, +before anything else happened, my Bob, my only brother, should--" + +"Your what!" roared Captain Eli, as if he had been shouting +orders in a raging storm. + +Mrs. Trimmer stepped back almost frightened. "My brother," +said she. "Didn't he tell you he was my brother--my brother Bob, +who sailed away a year before I was married, and who has been in +Africa and China and I don't know where? It's so long since I +heard that he'd gone into trading at Singapore that I'd given him +up as married and settled in foreign parts. And here he has come +to me as if he'd tumbled from the sky on this blessed Christmas +morning." + +Captain Eli made a step forward, his face very much flushed. + +"Your brother, Mrs. Trimmer--did you really say it was your +brother?" + +"Of course it is," said she. "Who else could it be?" Then +she paused for a moment and looked steadfastly at the captain. + +"You don't mean to say, Captain Eli," she asked, "that you +thought it was--" + +"Yes, I did," said Captain Eli, promptly. + +Mrs. Trimmer looked straight in the captain's eyes, then she +looked on the ground. Then she changed color and changed back +again. + +"I don't understand," she said hesitatingly, "why--I mean what +difference it made." + +"Difference!" exclaimed Captain Eli. "It was all the +difference between a man on deck and a man overboard--that's the +difference it was to me. I didn't expect to be talkin' to you so +early this Christmas mornin', but things has been sprung on me, +and I can't help it I just want to ask you one thing: Did you +think I was gettin' up this Christmas tree and the Christmas +dinner and the whole business fer the good of the little gal, and +fer the good of you, and fer the good of Captain Cephas?" + +Mrs. Trimmer had now recovered a very fair possession of +herself. "Of course I did," she answered, looking up at him as +she spoke. "Who else could it have been for!" + +"Well," said he, "you were mistaken. It wasn't fer any one +of you. It was all fer me--fer my own self." + +"You yourself?" said she. "I don't see how." + +"But I see how," he answered. "It's been a long time since I +wanted to speak my mind to you, Mrs. Trimmer, but I didn't ever +have no chance. And all these Christmas doin's was got up to +give me the chance not only of speakin' to you, but of showin' my +colors better than I could show them in any other way. +Everything went on a-skimmin' till this mornin', when that +stranger that we brought in from the shoal piped up and asked fer +you. Then I went overboard--at least, I thought I did--and sunk +down, down, clean out of soundin's." + +"That was too bad, captain," said she, speaking very gently, +"after all your trouble and kindness." + +"But I don't know now," he continued, "whether I went +overboard or whether I am on deck. Can you tell me, Mrs. +Trimmer?" + +She looked up at him. Her eyes were very soft, and her lips +trembled just a little. "It seems to me, captain," she said, +"that you are on deck--if you want to be." + +The captain stepped closer to her. "Mrs. Trimmer," said he, +"is that brother of yours comin' back?" + +"Yes," she answered, surprised at the sudden question. "He's +just gone up to the store to buy a shirt and some things. He got +himself splashed trying to push his boat off last night." + +"Well, then," said Captain Eli, "would you mind tellin' him +when he comes back that you and me's engaged to be married? I +don't know whether I've made a mistake in the lights or not, but +would you mind tellin' him that?" + +Mrs. Trimmer looked at him. Her eyes were not so soft as +they had been, but they were brighter. "I'd rather you'd tell +him that yourself," said she. + +The little girl sat on the floor near the Christmas tree, +just finishing a large piece of red-and-white candy which she had +taken out of her stocking. "People do hug a lot at Christmas- +time," said she to herself. Then she drew out a piece of blue- +and-white candy and began on that. + +Captain Cephas waited a long time for his friend to return, +and at last he thought it would be well to go and look for him. +When he entered the house he found Mrs. Trimmer sitting on the +sofa in the parlor, with Captain Eli on one side of her and her +brother on the other, and each of them holding one of her hands. + +"It looks as if I was in port, don't it?" said Captain Eli to +his astonished friend. "Well, here I am, and here's my fust +mate," inclining his head toward Mrs. Trimmer. "And she's in +port too, safe and sound. And that strange captain on the other +side of her, he's her brother Bob, who's been away for years and +years, and is just home from Madagascar." + +"Singapore," amended Brother Bob. + +Captain Cephas looked from one to the other of the three +occupants of the sofa, but made no immediate remark. Presently a +smile of genial maliciousness stole over his face, and he asked, +"How about the poor little gal? Have you sent her back to Mrs. +Crumley's?" + +The little girl came out from behind the Christmas tree, her +stocking, now but half filled, in her hand. "Here I am," she +said. "Don't you want to give me a Christmas hug, Captain +Cephas? You and me's the only ones that hasn't had any." + +The Christmas dinner was as truly and perfectly a sailor- +cooked meal as ever was served on board a ship or off it. +Captain Cephas had said that, and when he had so spoken there was +no need of further words. + +It was nearly dark that afternoon, and they were all sitting +around the kitchen fire, the three seafaring men smoking, and +Mrs. Trimmer greatly enjoying it. There could be no objection to +the smell of tobacco in this house so long as its future mistress +enjoyed it. The little girl sat on the floor nursing a Chinese +idol which had been one of her presents. + +"After all," said Captain Eli, meditatively, "this whole +business come out of my sleepin' with my best ear up. Fer if I'd +slept with my hard-o'-hearin' ear up--" Mrs. Trimmer put one +finger on his lips. "All right," said Captain Eli, "I won't say +no more. But it would have been different." + +Even now, several years after that Christmas, when there is +no Mrs. Trimmer, and the little girl, who has been regularly +adopted by Captain Eli and his wife, is studying geography, and +knows more about latitude and longitude than her teacher at +school, Captain Eli has still a slight superstitious dread of +sleeping with his best ear uppermost. + +"Of course it's the most all-fired nonsense," he says to +himself over and over again. Nevertheless, he feels safer when +it is his "hard-o'-hearin' ear" that is not upon the pillow. + + + + + LOVE BEFORE BREAKFAST + +I was still a young man when I came into the possession of an +excellent estate. This consisted of a large country house, +surrounded by lawns, groves, and gardens, and situated not far +from the flourishing little town of Boynton. Being an orphan +with no brothers or sisters, I set up here a bachelor's hall, in +which, for two years, I lived with great satisfaction and +comfort, improving my grounds and furnishing my house. When I +had made all the improvements which were really needed, and +feeling that I now had a most delightful home to come back to, I +thought it would be an excellent thing to take a trip to Europe, +give my mind a run in fresh fields, and pick up a lot of bric-a- +brac and ideas for the adornment and advantage of my house and +mind. + +It was the custom of the residents in my neighborhood who +owned houses and travelled in the summer to let their houses +during their absence, and my business agent and myself agreed +that this would be an excellent thing for me to do. If the house +were let to a suitable family it would yield me a considerable +income, and the place would not present on my return that air of +retrogression and desolation which I might expect if it were +left unoccupied and in charge of a caretaker. + +My agent assured me that I would have no trouble whatever in +letting my place, for it offered many advantages and I expected +but a reasonable rent. I desired to leave everything just as it +stood, house, furniture, books, horses, cows, and poultry, taking +with me only my clothes and personal requisites, and I desired +tenants who would come in bringing only their clothes and +personal requisites, which they could quietly take away with them +when their lease should expire and I should return home. + +In spite, however, of the assurances of the agent, it was not +easy to let my place. The house was too large for some people, +too small for others, and while some applicants had more horses +than I had stalls in my stable, others did not want even the +horses I would leave. I had engaged my steamer passage, and the +day for my departure drew near, and yet no suitable tenants had +presented themselves. I had almost come to the conclusion that +the whole matter would have to be left in the hands of my agent, +for I had no intention whatever of giving up my projected +travels, when early one afternoon some people came to look at the +house. Fortunately I was at home, and I gave myself the pleasure +of personally conducting them about the premises. It was a +pleasure, because as soon as I comprehended the fact that these +applicants desired to rent my house I wished them to have it. + +The family consisted of an elderly gentleman and his wife, +with a daughter of twenty or thereabout. This was a family that +suited me exactly. Three in number, no children, people of +intelligence and position, fond of the country, and anxious for +just such a place as I offered them--what could be better? + +The more I walked about and talked with these good people and +showed them my possessions, the more I desired that the young +lady should take my house. Of course her parents were included +in this wish, but it was for her ears that all my remarks were +intended, although sometimes addressed to the others, and she was +the tenant I labored to obtain. I say "labored" advisedly, +because I racked my brain to think of inducements which might +bring them to a speedy and favorable decision. + +Apart from the obvious advantages of the arrangement, it +would be a positive delight to me during my summer wanderings in +Europe to think that that beautiful girl would be strolling +through my grounds, enjoying my flowers, and sitting with her +book in the shady nooks I had made so pleasant, lying in my +hammocks, spending her evening hours in my study, reading my +books, writing at my desk, and perhaps musing in my easy-chair. +Before these applicants appeared it had sometimes pained me to +imagine strangers in my home; but no such thought crossed my mind +in regard to this young lady, who, if charming in the house and +on the lawn, grew positively entrancing when she saw my Jersey +cows and my two horses, regarding them with an admiration which +even surpassed my own. + +Long before we had completed the tour of inspection I had +made up my mind that this young lady should come to live in my +house. If obstacles should show themselves they should be +removed. I would tear down, I would build, I would paper and +paint, I would put in all sorts of electric bells, I would reduce +the rent until it suited their notions exactly, I would have my +horses' tails banged if she liked that kind of tails better than +long ones--I would do anything to make them definitely decide to +take the place before they left me. I trembled to think of her +going elsewhere and giving other householders a chance to tempt +her. She had looked at a good many country houses, but it was +quite plain that none of them had pleased her so well as mine. + +I left them in my library to talk the matter over by +themselves, and in less than ten minutes the young lady herself +came out on the lawn to tell me that her father and mother had +decided to take the place and would like to speak with me. + +"I am so glad," she said as we went in. "I am sure I shall +enjoy every hour of our stay here. It is so different from +anything we have yet seen." + +When everything had been settled I wanted to take them again +over the place and point out a lot of things I had omitted. I +particularly wanted to show them some lovely walks in the woods. +But there was no time, for they had to catch a train. + +Her name was Vincent--Cora Vincent, as I discovered from her +mother's remarks. + +As soon as they departed I had my mare saddled and rode into +town to see my agent. I went into his office exultant. + +"I've let my house," I said, "and I want you to make out the +lease and have everything fixed and settled as soon as possible. +This is the address of my tenants." + +The agent asked me a good many questions, being particularly +anxious to know what rent had been agreed upon. + +"Heavens!" he exclaimed, when I mentioned the sum, "that is +ever so much less than I told you you could get. I am in +communication now with a party whom I know would pay you +considerably more than these people. Have you definitely settled +with them? Perhaps it is not too late to withdraw." + +"Withdraw!" I cried. "Never! They are the only tenants I +want. I was determined to get them, and I think I must have +lowered the rent four or five times in the course of the +afternoon. I took a big slice out of it before I mentioned the +sum at all. You see," said I, very impressively, "these Vincents +exactly suit me." And then I went on to state fully the +advantages of the arrangement, omitting, however, any references +to my visions of Miss Vincent swinging in my hammocks or musing +in my study-chair. + +It was now May 15, and my steamer would sail on the twenty- +first. The intervening days I employed, not in preparing for my +travels, but in making every possible arrangement for the comfort +and convenience of my incoming tenants. The Vincents did not +wish to take possession until June 1, and I was sorry they had +not applied before I had engaged my passage, for in that case I +would have selected a later date. A very good steamer sailed on +June 3, and it would have suited me just as well. + +Happening to be in New York one day, I went to the Vincents' +city residence to consult with them in regard to some awnings +which I proposed putting up at the back of the house. I found no +one at home but the old gentleman, and it made no difference +to him whether the awnings were black and brown or red and +yellow. I cordially invited him to come out before I left, and +bring his family, that they might look about the place to see if +there was anything they would like to have done which had not +already been attended to. It was so much better, I told him, to +talk over these matters personally with the owner than with an +agent in his absence. Agents were often very unwilling to make +changes. Mr. Vincent was a very quiet and exceedingly pleasant +elderly gentleman, and thanked me very much for my invitation, +but said he did not see how he could find the time to get out to +my house before I sailed. I did not like to say that it was not +at all necessary for him to neglect his affairs in order to +accompany his family to my place, but I assured him that if any +of them wished to go out at any time before they took possession +they must feel at perfect liberty to do so. + +I mentioned this matter to my agent, suggesting that if he +happened to be in New York he might call on the Vincents and +repeat my invitation. It was not likely that the old gentleman +would remember to mention it to his wife and daughter, and it was +really important that everything should be made satisfactory +before I left. + +"It seems to me," he said, smiling a little grimly, "that the +Vincents had better be kept away from your house until you have +gone. If you do anything more to it you may find out that it +would have been more profitable to have shut it up while you are +away." + +He did call, however, partly because I wished him to and +partly because he was curious to see the people I was so +anxious to install in my home, and to whom he was to be my legal +representative. He reported the next day that he had found no +one at home but Miss Vincent, and that she had said that she and +her mother would be very glad to come out the next week and go +over the place before they took possession. + +"Next week!" I exclaimed. "I shall be gone then!" + +"But I shall be here," said Mr. Barker, "and I'll show them +about and take their suggestions." + +This did not suit me at all. It annoyed me very much to +think of Barker showing Miss Vincent about my place. He was a +good-looking young man and not at all backward in his manners. + +"After all," said I, "I suppose that everything that ought to +be done has been done. I hope you told her that." + +"Of course not," said he. "That would have been running dead +against your orders. Besides, it's my business to show people +about places. I don't mind it." + +This gave me an unpleasant and uneasy feeling. I wondered if +Mr. Barker were the agent I ought to have, and if a middle-aged +man with a family and more experience might not be better able to +manage my affairs. + +"Barker," said I, a little later, "there will be no use of +your going every month to the Vincents to collect their rent. I +shall write to Mr. Vincent to pay as he pleases. He can send a +check monthly or at the end of the season, as it may be +convenient. He is perfectly responsible, and I would much prefer +to have the money in a lump when I come back." + +Barker grinned. "All right," said he, "but that's not the +way to do business, you know." + +I may have been mistaken, but I fancied that I saw in my +agent's face an expression which indicated that he intended to +call on the first day of each month, on the pretext of telling +Vincent that it was not necessary to pay the rent at any +particular time, and that he also proposed to make many other +intervening visits to inquire if repairs were needed. This might +have been a good deal to get out of his expression, but I think I +could have got more if I had thought longer. + +On the day before that on which I was to sail, my mind was in +such a disturbed condition that I could not attend to my packing +or anything else. It almost enraged me to think that I was +deliberately leaving the country ten days before my tenants would +come to my house. There was no reason why I should do this. +There were many reasons why I should not. There was Barker. I +was now of the opinion that he would personally superintend the +removal of the Vincents and their establishment to my home. I +remembered that the only suggestion he had made about the +improvement of the place had been the construction of a tennis- +court. I knew that he was a champion player. Confound it! What +a dreadful mistake I had made in selecting such a man for my +house-agent. With my mind's eye I could already see Miss Vincent +and Barker selecting a spot for tennis and planning the +arrangements of the court. + +I took the first train to New York and went directly to the +steamboat office. It is astonishing how many obstacles can be +removed from a man's path if he will make up his mind to +give them a good kick. I found that my steamer was crowded. The +applications for passage exceeded the accommodations, and the +agent was delighted to transfer me to the steamer that sailed on +June 3. I went home exultant. Barker drove over in the evening +to take his last instructions, and a blank look came over his +face when I told him that business had delayed my departure, and +that I should not sail the next day. If I had told him that part +of that business was the laying out of a tennis-court he might +have looked blanker. + +Of course the date of my departure did not concern the +Vincents, provided the house was vacated by June 1, and I did not +inform them of the change in my plans, but when the mother and +daughter came out the next week they were much surprised to find +me waiting to receive them instead of Barker. I hope that they +were also pleased, and I am sure that they had every reason to be +so. Mrs. Vincent, having discovered that I was a most complacent +landlord, accommodated herself easily to my disposition and made +a number of minor requirements, all of which I granted without +the slightest hesitation. I was delighted at last to put her +into the charge of my housekeeper, and when the two had betaken +themselves to the bedrooms I invited Miss Vincent to come out +with me to select a spot for a tennis-court. The invitation was +accepted with alacrity, for tennis, she declared, was a passion +with her. + +The selection of that tennis-court took nearly an hour, for +there were several good places for one and it was hard to make a +selection; besides, I could not lose the opportunity of taking +Miss Vincent into the woods and showing her the walks I had +made and the rustic seats I had placed in pleasant nooks. Of +course she would have discovered these, but it was a great deal +better for her to know all about them before she came. At last +Mrs. Vincent sent a maid to tell her daughter that it was time to +go for the train, and the court had not been definitely planned. + +The next day I went to Miss Vincent's house with a plan of +the grounds, and she and I talked it over until the matter was +settled. It was necessary to be prompt about this, I explained, +as there would be a great deal of levelling and rolling to be +done. + +I also had a talk with the old gentleman about books. There +were several large boxes of my books in New York which I had +never sent out to my country house. Many of these I thought +might be interesting to him, and I offered to have them taken out +and left at his disposal. When he heard the titles of some of +the books in the collection he was much interested, but insisted +that before he made use of them they should be catalogued, as +were the rest of my effects. I hesitated a moment, wondering if +I could induce Barker to come to New York and catalogue four big +boxes of books, when, to my surprise, Miss Vincent incidentally +remarked that if they were in any place where she could get at +them she would be pleased to help catalogue them; that sort of +thing was a great pleasure to her. Instantly I proposed that I +should send the books to the Vincent house, that they should +there be taken out so that Mr. Vincent could select those he +might care to read during the summer, that I would make a list of +these, and if Vincent would assist me I would be grateful +for the kindness, and those that were not desired could be +returned to the storehouse. + +What a grand idea was this! I had been internally groaning +because I could think of no possible pretence, for further +interviews with Miss Vincent, and here was something better than +I could have imagined. Her father declared that he could not put +me to so much trouble, but I would listen to none of his words, +and the next morning my books were spread over his library floor. + +The selection and cataloguing of the volumes desired occupied +the mornings of three days. The old gentleman's part was soon +done, but there were many things in the books which were far more +interesting to me than their titles, and to which I desired to +draw Miss Vincent's attention. All this greatly protracted our +labors. She was not only a beautiful girl, but her intelligence +and intellectual grasp were wonderful. I could not help telling +her what a great pleasure it would be to me to think, while +wandering in foreign lands, that such an appreciative family +would be enjoying my books and my place. + +"You are so fond of your house and everything you have," said +she, "that we shall almost feel as if we were depriving you of +your rights. But I suppose that Italian lakes and the Alps will +make you forget for a time even your beautiful home." + +"Not if you are in it," I longed to say, but I restrained +myself. I did not believe that it was possible for me to be more +in love with this girl than I was at that moment, but, of course, +it would be the rankest stupidity to tell her so. To her I was +simply her father's landlord. + + I went to that house the next day to see that the boxes were +properly repacked, and I actually went the next day to see if the +right boxes had gone into the country, and the others back to the +storehouse. The first day I saw only the father. The second day +it was the mother who assured me that everything had been +properly attended to. I began to feel that if I did not wish a +decided rebuff I would better not make any more pretences of +business at the Vincent house. + +There were affairs of my own which should have been attended +to, and I ought to have gone home and attended to them, but I +could not bear to do so. There was no reason to suppose she +would go out there before the first of June. + +Thinking over the matter many times, I came to the conclusion +that if I could see her once more I would be satisfied. Then I +would go away, and carry her image with me into every art- +gallery, over every glacier, and under every lovely sky that I +should enjoy abroad, hoping all the time that, taking my place, +as it were, in my home, and making my possessions, in a measure, +her own, she would indirectly become so well acquainted with me +that when I returned I might speak to her without shocking her. + +To obtain this final interview there was but one way. I had +left my house on Saturday, the Vincents would come on the +following Monday, and I would sail on Wednesday. I would go on +Tuesday to inquire if they found everything to their +satisfaction. This would be a very proper attention from a +landlord about to leave the country. + +When I reached Boynton I determined to walk to my house, +for I did not wish to encumber myself with a hired vehicle. I +might be asked to stay to luncheon. A very strange feeling came +over me as I entered my grounds. They were not mine. For the +time being they belonged to somebody else. I was merely a +visitor or a trespasser if the Vincents thought proper so to +consider me. If they did not like people to walk on the grass I +had no right to do it. + +None of my servants had been left on the place, and the maid +who came to the door informed me that Mr. Vincent had gone to New +York that morning, and that Mrs. Vincent and her daughter were +out driving. I ventured to ask if she thought they would soon +return, and she answered that she did not think they would, as +they had gone to Rock Lake, which, from the way they talked about +it, must be a long way off. + +Rock Lake! When I had driven over there with my friends, we +had taken luncheon at the inn and returned in the afternoon. And +what did they know of Rock Lake? Who had told them of it? That +officious Barker, of course. + +"Will you leave a message, sir?" said the maid, who, of +course, did not know me. + +"No," said I, and as I still stood gazing at the piazza +floor, she remarked that if I wished to call again she would go +out and speak to the coachman and ask him if anything had been +said to him about the time of the party's return. + +Worse and worse! Their coachman had not driven them! Some +one who knew the country had been their companion. They were not +acquainted in the neighborhood, and there could not be a shadow +of a doubt that it was that obtrusive Barker who had +indecently thrust himself upon them on the very next day +after their arrival, and had thus snatched from me this last +interview upon which I had counted so earnestly. + +I had no right to ask any more questions. I left no message +nor any name, and I had no excuse for saying I would call again. + +I got back to my hotel without having met any one whom I +knew, and that night I received a note from Barker, stating that +he had fully intended coming to the steamer to see me off, but +that an engagement would prevent him. He sent, however, his best +good wishes for my safe passage, and assured me that he would +keep me fully informed of the state of my affairs on this side. + +"Engagement!" I exclaimed. "Is he going to drive with her +again to-morrow?" + +My steamer sailed at two o'clock the next day, and after an +early breakfast I went to the company's office to see if I could +dispose of my ticket. It had become impossible, I told the +agent, for me to leave America at present. He said it was a very +late hour to sell my ticket, but that he would do what he could, +and if an applicant turned up he would give him my room and +refund the money. He wanted me to change to another date, but I +declined to do this. I was not able to say when I should sail. + +I now had no plan of action. All I knew was that I could not +leave America without finding out something definite about this +Barker business. That is to say, if it should be made known to +me that instead of attending to my business, sending a carpenter +to make repairs, if such were necessary, or going personally to +the plumber to make sure that that erratic personage would give +his attention to any pipes in regard to which Mr. Vincent might +have written, Barker should mingle in sociable relations with my +tenants, and drive or play tennis with the young lady of the +house, then would I immediately have done with him. I would +withdraw my business from his hands and place it in those of old +Mr. Poindexter. More than that, it might be my duty to warn Miss +Vincent's parents against Barker. I did not doubt that he was a +very good house and land-agent, but in selecting him as such I +had no idea of introducing him to the Vincents in a social way. +In fact, the more I thought about it the more I became convinced +that if ever I mentioned Barker to my tenants it would be to warn +them against him. From certain points of view he was actually a +dangerous man. + +This, however, I would not do until I found my agent was +really culpable. To discover what Barker had done, what he was +doing, and what he intended to do, was now my only business in +life. Until I had satisfied myself on these points I could not +think of starting out upon my travels. + +Now that I had determined I would not start for Europe until +I had satisfied myself that Mr. Barker was contenting himself +with attending to my business, and not endeavoring to force +himself into social relations with my tenants, I was anxious that +the postponement of my journey should be unknown to my friends +and acquaintances, and I was, therefore, very glad to see in a +newspaper, published on the afternoon of the day of my intended +departure, my name among the list of passengers who had sailed +upon the Mnemonic. For the first time I commended the +super-enterprise of a reporter who gave more attention to the +timeliness of his news than to its accuracy. + +I was stopping at a New York hotel, but I did not wish to +stay there. Until I felt myself ready to start on my travels the +neighborhood of Boynton would suit me better than anywhere else. +I did not wish to go to the town itself, for Barker lived there, +and I knew many of the townspeople; but there were farmhouses not +far away where I might spend a week. After considering the +matter, I thought of something that might suit me. About three +miles from my house, on an unfrequented road, was a mill which +stood at the end of an extensive sheet of water, in reality a +mill-pond, but commonly called a lake. The miller, an old man, +had recently died, and his house near by was occupied by a +newcomer whom I had never seen. If I could get accommodations +there it would suit me exactly. I left the train two stations +below Boynton and walked over to the mill. + +The country-folk in my neighborhood are always pleased to +take summer boarders if they can get them, and the miller and his +wife were glad to give me a room, not imagining that I was the +owner of a good house not far away. The place suited my +requirements very well. It was near her, and I might live here +for a time unnoticed, but what I was going to do with my +opportunity I did not know. Several times the conviction forced +itself upon me that I should get up at once and go to Europe by +the first steamer, and so show myself that I was a man of sense. + +This conviction was banished on the second afternoon of my +stay at the mill. I was sitting under a tree in the orchard +near the house, thinking and smoking my pipe, when along the road +which ran by the side of the lake came Mr. Vincent on my black +horse General and his daughter on my mare Sappho. Instinctively +I pulled my straw hat over my eyes, but this precaution was not +necessary. They were looking at the beautiful lake, with its +hills and overhanging trees, and saw me not! + +When the very tip of Sappho's tail had melted into the +foliage of the road, I arose to my feet and took a deep breath of +the happy air. I had seen her, and it was with her father she +was riding. + +I do not believe I slept a minute that night through thinking +of her, and feeling glad that I was near her, and that she had +been riding with her father. + +When the early dawn began to break an idea brighter than the +dawn broke upon me: I would get up and go nearer to her. It is +amazing how much we lose by not getting up early on the long +summer days. How beautiful the morning might be on this earth I +never knew until I found myself wandering by the edge of my woods +and over my lawn with the tender gray-blue sky above me and all +the freshness of the grass and flowers and trees about me, the +birds singing among the branches, and she sleeping sweetly +somewhere within that house with its softly defined lights and +shadows. How I wished I knew what room she occupied! + +The beauties and joys of that hour were lost to every person +on the place, who were all, no doubt, in their soundest sleep. I +did not even see a dog. Quietly and stealthily stepping from +bush to hedge, I went around the house, and as I drew near the +barn I fancied I could hear from a little room adjoining it +the snores of the coachman. The lazy rascal would probably not +awaken for two or three hours yet, but I would ran no risks, and +in half an hour I had sped away. + +Now I knew exactly why I was staying at the house of the +miller. I was doing so in order that I might go early in the +mornings to my own home, in which the girl I loved lay dreaming, +and that for the rest of the day and much of the night I might +think of her. + +"What place in Europe," I said to myself, "could be so +beautiful, so charming, and so helpful to reflection as this +sequestered lake, these noble trees, these stretches of +undulating meadow?" + +Even if I should care to go abroad, a month or two later +would answer all my purposes. Why had I ever thought of spending +five months away? + +There was a pretty stream which ran from the lake and wended +its way through a green and shaded valley, and here, with a rod, +I wandered and fished and thought. The miller had boats, and in +one of these I rowed far up the lake where it narrowed into a +creek, and between the high hills which shut me out from the +world I would float and think. + +Every morning, soon after break of day, I went to my home and +wandered about my grounds. If it rained I did not mind that. I +like a summer rain. + +Day by day I grew bolder. Nobody in that household thought +of getting up until seven o'clock. For two hours, at least, I +could ramble undisturbed through my grounds, and much as I had +once enjoyed these grounds, they never afforded me the pleasure +they gave me now. In these happy mornings I felt all the +life and spirits of a boy. I went into my little field and +stroked the sleek sides of my cows as they nibbled the dewy +grass. I even peeped through the barred window of Sappho's box +and fed her, as I had been used to doing, with bunches of clover. +I saw that the young chickens were flourishing. I went into the +garden and noted the growth of the vegetables, feeling glad that +she would have so many fine strawberries and tender peas. + +I had not the slightest doubt that she was fond of flowers, +and for her sake now, as I used to do for my own sake, I visited +the flower beds and borders. Not far from the house there was a +cluster of old-fashioned pinks which I was sure were not doing +very well. They had been there too long, perhaps, and they +looked stunted and weak. In the miller's garden I had noticed +great beds of these pinks, and I asked his wife if I might have +some, and she, considering them as mere wild flowers, said I +might have as many as I liked. She might have thought I wanted +simply the blossoms, but the next morning I went over to my house +with a basket filled with great matted masses of the plants taken +up with the roots and plenty of earth around them, and after +twenty minutes' work in my own bed of pinks, I had taken out all +the old plants and filled their places with fresh, luxuriant +masses of buds and leaves and blossoms. How glad she would be +when she saw the fresh life that had come to that flower-bed! +With light footsteps I went away, not feeling the weight of the +basket filled with the old plants and roots. + +The summer grew and strengthened, and the sun rose earlier, +but as that had no effect upon the rising of the present +inhabitants of my place, it gave me more time for my morning +pursuits. Gradually I constituted myself the regular flower- +gardener of the premises. How delightful the work was, and how +foolish I thought I had been never to think of doing this thing +for myself! but no doubt it was because I was doing it for her +that I found it so pleasant. + +Once again I had seen Miss Vincent. It was in the afternoon, +and I had rowed myself to the upper part of the lake, where, with +the high hills and the trees on each side of me, I felt as if I +were alone in the world. Floating, idly along, with my thoughts +about three miles away, I heard the sound of oars, and looking +out on the open part of the lake, I saw a boat approaching. The +miller was rowing, and in the stern sat an elderly gentleman and +a young lady. I knew them in an instant: they were Mr. and Miss +Vincent. + +With a few vigorous strokes I shot myself into the shadows, +and rowed up the stream into the narrow stretches among the lily- +pads, under a bridge, and around a little wooded point, where I +ran the boat ashore and sprang upon the grassy bank. Although I +did not believe the miller would bring them as far as this, I +went up to a higher spot and watched for half an hour; but I did +not see them again. How relieved I was! It would have been +terribly embarrassing had they discovered me. And how +disappointed I was that the miller turned back so soon! + +I now extended the supervision of my grounds. I walked +through the woods, and saw how beautiful they were in the early +dawn. I threw aside the fallen twigs and cut away encroaching +saplings, which were beginning to encumber the paths I had made, +and if I found a bough which hung too low I cut it off. +There was a great beech-tree, between which and a dogwood I had +the year before suspended a hammock. In passing this, one +morning, I was amazed to see a hammock swinging from the hooks I +had put in the two trees. This was a retreat which I had +supposed no one else would fancy or even think of! In the +hammock was a fan--a common Japanese fan. For fifteen minutes I +stood looking at that hammock, every nerve a-tingle. Then I +glanced around. The spot had been almost unfrequented since last +summer. Little bushes, weeds, and vines had sprung up here and +there between the two trees. There were dead twigs and limbs +lying about, and the short path to the main walk was much +overgrown. + +I looked at my watch. It was a quarter to six. I had yet a +good hour for work, and with nothing but my pocket-knife and my +hands I began to clear away the space about that hammock. When I +left it, it looked as it used to look when it was my pleasure to +lie there and swing and read and reflect. + +To approach this spot it was not necessary to go through my +grounds, for my bit of woods adjoined a considerable stretch of +forest-land, and in my morning walks from the mill I often used a +path through these woods. The next morning when I took this path +I was late because I had unfortunately overslept myself. When I +reached the hammock it wanted fifteen minutes to seven o'clock. +It was too late for me to do anything, but I was glad to be able +to stay there even for a few minutes, to breathe that air, to +stand on that ground, to touch that hammock. I did more than +that. Why shouldn't I? I got into it. It was a better one +than that I had hung there. It was delightfully comfortable. At +this moment, gently swinging in that woodland solitude, with the +sweet odors of the morning all about me, I felt myself nearer to +her than I had ever been before. + +But I knew I must not revel in this place too long. I was on +the point of rising to leave when I heard approaching footsteps. +My breath stopped. Was I at last to be discovered? This was +what came of my reckless security. But perhaps the person, some +workman most likely, would pass without noticing me. To remain +quiet seemed the best course, and I lay motionless. + +But the person approaching turned into the little pathway. +The footsteps came nearer. I sprang from the hammock. Before me +was Miss Vincent! + +What was my aspect I know not, but I have no doubt I turned +fiery red. She stopped suddenly, but she did not turn red. + +"Oh, Mr. Ripley," she exclaimed, "good morning! You must +excuse me. I did not know--" + +That she should have had sufficient self-possession to say +good morning amazed me. Her whole appearance, in fact, amazed +me. There seemed to be something wanting in her manner. I +endeavored to get myself into condition. + +"You must be surprised," I said, "to see me here. You +supposed I was in Europe, but--" + +As I spoke I made a couple of steps toward her, but suddenly +stopped. One of my coat buttons had caught in the meshes of the +hammock. It was confoundedly awkward. I tried to loosen the +button, but it was badly entangled. Then I desperately +pulled at it to tear it off. + +"Oh, don't do that," she said. "Let me unfasten it for you." +And taking the threads of the hammock in one of her little hands +and the button in the other, she quickly separated them. "I +should think buttons would be very inconvenient things--at least, +in hammocks," she said smiling. "You see, girls don't have any +such trouble." + +I could not understand her manner. She seemed to take my +being there as a matter of course. + +"I must beg a thousand pardons for this--this trespass," I +said. + +"Trespass!" said she, with a smile. "People don't trespass +on their own land--" + +"But it is not my land," said I. "It is your father's for +the time being. I have no right here whatever. I do not know +how to explain, but you must think it very strange to find me +here when you supposed I had started for Europe." + +"Oh! I knew you had not started for Europe," said she, +"because I have seen you working in the grounds--" + +"Seen me!" I interrupted. "Is it possible?" + +"Oh, yes," said she. "I don't know how long you had been +coming when I first saw you, but when I found that fresh bed of +pinks all transplanted from somewhere, and just as lovely as they +could be, instead of the old ones, I spoke to the man; but he did +not know anything about it, and said he had not had time to do +anything to the flowers, whereas I had been giving him credit for +ever so much weeding and cleaning up. Then I supposed that Mr. +Barker, who is just as kind and attentive as he can be, had +done it; but I could hardly believe he was the sort of man to +come early in the morning and work out of doors,"--("Oh, how I +wish he had come!" I thought. "If I had caught him here working +among the flowers!"),--"and when he came that afternoon to play +tennis I found that he had been away for two days, and could not +have planted the pinks. So I simply got up early one morning and +looked out, and there I saw you, with your coat off, working just +as hard as ever you could." + +I stepped back, my mind for a moment a perfect blank. + +"What could you have thought of me?" I exclaimed presently. + +"Really, at first I did not know what to think," said she. "Of +course I did not know what had detained you in this country, +but I remembered that I had heard that you were a very particular +person about your flowers and shrubs and grounds, and that most +likely you thought they would be better taken care of if you kept +an eye on them, and that when you found there was so much to do +you just went to work and did it. I did not speak of this to +anybody, because if you did not wish it to be known that you were +taking care of the grounds it was not my business to tell people +about it. But yesterday, when I found this place where I had +hung my hammock so beautifully cleared up and made so nice and +clean and pleasant in every way, I thought I must come down to +tell you how much obliged I am, and also that you ought not to +take so much trouble for us. If you think the grounds need more +attention, I will persuade my father to hire another man, now and +then, to work about the place. Really, Mr. Ripley, you +ought not to have to--" + +I was humbled, abashed. She had seen me at my morning devotions, +and this was the way she interpreted them. She considered me an +overnice fellow who was so desperately afraid his place would be +injured that he came sneaking around every morning to see if any +damage had been done and to put things to rights. + +She stood for a moment as if expecting me to speak, brushed a +buzzing fly from her sleeve, and then, looking at me with a +gentle smile, she turned a little as if she were about to leave. + +I could not let her go without telling her something. Her +present opinion of me must not rest in her mind another minute. +And yet, what story could I devise? How, indeed, could I devise +anything with which to deceive a girl who spoke and looked at me +as this girl did? I could not do it. I must rush away +speechless and never see her again, or I must tell her all. I +came a little nearer to her. + +"Miss Vincent," said I, "you do not understand at all why I +am here--why I have been here so much--why I did not go to +Europe. The truth is, I could not leave. I do not wish to be +away; I want to come here and live here always--" + +"Oh, dear! " she interrupted, "of course it is natural that +you should not want to tear yourself away from your lovely home. +It would be very hard for us to go away now, especially for +father and me, for we have grown to love this place so much. But +if you want us to leave, I dare say--" + +"I want you to leave!" I exclaimed. "Never! When I say +that I want to live here myself, that my heart will not let me go +anywhere else, I mean that I want you to live here too--you, your +mother and father--that I want--" + + "Oh, that would be perfectly splendid!" she said. "I have +ever so often thought that it was a shame that you should be +deprived of the pleasures you so much enjoy, which I see you can +find here and nowhere else. Now, I have a plan which I think +will work splendidly. We are a very small family. Why shouldn't +you come here and live with us? There is plenty of room, and I +know father and mother would be very glad, and you can pay your +board, if that would please you better. You can have the room at +the top of the tower for your study and your smoking den, and the +room under it can be your bedroom, so you can be just as +independent as you please of the rest of us, and you can be +living on your own place without interfering with us in the +least. In fact, it would be ever so nice, especially as I am in +the habit of going away to the sea-shore with my aunt every +summer for six weeks, and I was thinking how lonely it would be +this year for father and mother to stay here all by themselves." + +The tower and the room under it! For me! What a contemptibly +little-minded and insignificant person she must think me. The +words with which I strove to tell her that I wished to live here +as lord, with her as my queen, would not come. She looked at me +for a moment as I stood on the brink of saying something but not +saying it, and then she turned suddenly toward the hammock. + +"Did you see anything of a fan I left here?" she said. "I +know I left it here, but when I came yesterday it was gone. +Perhaps you may have noticed it somewhere--" + +Now, the morning before, I had taken that fan home with me. +It was an awkward thing to carry, but I had concealed it under my +coat. It was a contemptible trick, but the fan had her initials +on it, and as it was the only thing belonging to her of which I +could possess myself, the temptation had been too great to +resist. As she stood waiting for my answer there was a light in +her eye which illuminated my perceptions. + +"Did you see me take that fan?" I asked. + +"I did," said she. + +"Then you know," I exclaimed, stepping nearer to her, "why it +is I did not leave this country as I intended, why it was +impossible for me to tear myself away from this house, why it is +that I have been here every morning, hovering around and doing +the things I have been doing?" + +She looked up at me, and with her eyes she said, "How could I +help knowing?" She might have intended to say something with her +lips, but I took my answer from her eyes, and with the quick +impulse of a lover I stopped her speech. + +"You have strange ways," she said presently, blushing and +gently pressing back my arm. "I haven't told you a thing." + +"Let us tell each other everything now," I cried, and we +seated ourselves in the hammock. + +It was a quarter of an hour later and we were still sitting +together in the hammock. + +"You may think," said she, "that, knowing what I did, it was +very queer for me to come out to you this morning, but I +could not help it. You were getting dreadfully careless, and +were staying so late and doing things which people would have +been bound to notice, especially as father is always talking +about our enjoying the fresh hours of the morning, that I felt I +could not let you go on any longer. And when it came to that fan +business I saw plainly that you must either immediately start for +Europe or--" + +"Or what?" I interrupted. + +"Or go to my father and regularly engage yourself as a--" + +I do not know whether she was going to say "gardener" or not, +but it did not matter. I stopped her. + +It was perhaps twenty minutes later, and we were standing +together at the edge of the woods. She wanted me to come to the +house to take breakfast with them. + +"Oh, I could not do that!" I said. "They would be so +surprised. I should have so much to explain before I could even +begin to state my case." + +"Well, then, explain," said she. "You will find father on +the front piazza. He is always there before breakfast, and there +is plenty of time. After all that has been said here, I cannot +go to breakfast and look commonplace while you run away." + +"But suppose your father objects?" said I. + +"Well, then you will have to go back and take breakfast with +your miller," said she. + +I never saw a family so little affected by surprises as those +Vincents. When I appeared on the front piazza the old gentleman +did not jump. He shook hands with me and asked me to sit down, +and when I told him everything he did not even ejaculate, +but simply folded his hands together and looked out over the +railing. + +"It seemed strange to Mrs. Vincent and myself," he said, +"when we first noticed your extraordinary attachment for our +daughter, but, after all, it was natural enough." + +"Noticed it!" I exclaimed. "When did you do that?" + +"Very soon," he said. "When you and Cora were cataloguing +the books at my house in town I noticed it and spoke to Mrs. +Vincent, but she said it was nothing new to her, for it was plain +enough on the day when we first met you here that you were +letting the house to Cora, and that she had not spoken of it to +me because she was afraid I might think it wrong to accept the +favorable and unusual arrangements you were making with us if I +suspected the reason for them. We talked over the matter, but, +of course, we could do nothing, because there was nothing to do, +and Mrs. Vincent was quite sure you would write to us from +Europe. But when my man Ambrose told me he had seen some one +working about the place in the very early morning, and that, as +it was a gentleman, he supposed it must be the landlord, for +nobody else would be doing such things, Mrs. Vincent and I looked +out of the window the next day, and when we found it was indeed +you who were coming here every day, we felt that the matter was +serious and were a good deal troubled. We found, however, that +you were conducting affairs in a very honorable way,--that you +were not endeavoring to see Cora, and that you did not try to +have any secret correspondence with her,--and as we had no right +to prevent you from coming on your grounds, we concluded to +remain quiet until you should take some step which we would be +authorized to notice. Later, when Mr. Barker came and told me +that you had not gone to Europe, and were living with a miller +not far from here--" + +"Barker!" I cried. "The scoundrel!" + +"You are mistaken, sir," said Mr. Vincent. "He spoke with +the greatest kindness of you, and said that as it was evident you +had your own reasons for wishing to stay in the neighborhood, and +did not wish the fact to be known, he had spoken of it to no one +but me, and he would not have done this had he not thought it +would prevent embarrassment in case we should meet." + +Would that everlasting Barker ever cease meddling in my affairs? + +"Do you suppose," I asked, "that he imagined the reason for +my staying here?" + +"I do not know," said the old gentleman, "but after the +questions I put to him I have no doubt he suspected it. I made +many inquiries of him regarding you, your family, habits, and +disposition, for this was a very vital matter to me, sir, and I +am happy to inform you that he said nothing of you that was not +good, so I urged him to keep the matter to himself. I +determined, however, that if you continued your morning visits I +should take an early opportunity of accosting you and asking an +explanation." + +"And you never mentioned anything of this to your daughter?" +said I. + +"Oh, no," he answered. "We carefully kept everything from her." + +"But, my dear sir," said I, rising, "you have given me no answer. + +You have not told me whether or not you will accept me as a +son-in-law." + +He smiled. "Truly," he said, "I have not answered you; but +the fact is, Mrs. Vincent and I have considered the matter so +long, and having come to the conclusion that if you made an +honorable and straightforward proposition, and if Cora were +willing to accept you, we could see no reason to object to--" + +At this moment the front door opened and Cora appeared. + +"Are you going to stay to breakfast?" she asked. "Because, +if you are, it is ready." + +I stayed to breakfast. + +I am now living in my own house, not in the two tower rooms, +but in the whole mansion, of which my former tenant, Cora, is now +mistress supreme. Mr. and Mrs. Vincent expect to spend the next +summer here and take care of the house while we are travelling. + +Mr. Barker, an excellent fellow and a most thorough business +man, still manages my affairs, and there is nothing on the place +that flourishes so vigorously as the bed of pinks which I got +from the miller's wife. + +By the way, when I went back to my lodging on that eventful +day, the miller's wife met me at the door. + +"I kept your breakfast waitin' for you for a good while," +said she, "but as you didn't come, I supposed you were takin' +breakfast in your own house, and I cleared it away." + +"Do you know who I am?" I exclaimed. + +"Oh, yes, sir," she said. "We did not at first, but when +everybody began to talk about it we couldn't help knowin' it." + +"Everybody!" I gasped. "And may I ask what you and everybody +said about me?" + +"I think it was the general opinion, sir," said she, "that +you were suspicious of them tenants of yours, and nobody wondered +at it, for when city people gets into the country and on other +people's property, there's no trustin' them out of your sight for +a minute." + +I could not let the good woman hold this opinion of my +tenants, and I briefly told her the truth. She looked at me with +moist admiration in her eyes. + +"I am glad to hear that, sir," said she. "I like it very +much. But if I was you I wouldn't be in a hurry to tell my +husband and the people in the neighborhood about it. They might +be a little disappointed at first, for they had a mighty high +opinion of you when they thought that you was layin' low here to +keep an eye on them tenants of yours." + + + + THE STAYING POWER OF + SIR ROHAN + +During the winter in which I reached my twenty fifth year I lived +with my mother's brother, Dr. Alfred Morris, in Warburton, a +small country town, and I was there beginning the practice of +medicine. I had been graduated in the spring, and my uncle +earnestly advised me to come to him and act as his assistant, +which advice, considering the fact that he was an elderly man, +and that I might hope to succeed him in his excellent practice, +was considered good advice by myself and my family. + +At this time I practised very little, but learned a great +deal, for as I often accompanied my uncle on his professional +visits, I could not have taken a better postgraduate course. + +I had an invitation to spend the Christmas of that year with +the Collingwoods, who had opened their country house, about +twelve miles from Warburton, for the entertainment of a holiday +house party. I had gladly accepted the invitation, and on the +day before Christmas I went to the livery stable in the village +to hire a horse and sleigh for the trip. At the stable I met +Uncle Beamish, who had also come to hire a conveyance. + +"Uncle Beamish," as he was generally called in the village, +although I am sure he had no nephews or nieces in the place, +was an elderly man who had retired from some business, I know not +what, and was apparently quite able to live upon whatever income +he had. He was a good man, rather illiterate, but very shrewd. +Generous in good works, I do not think he was fond of giving away +money, but his services were at the call of all who needed them. + +I liked Uncle Beamish very much, for he was not only a good +story-teller, but he was willing to listen to my stories, and +when I found he wanted to hire a horse and sleigh to go to the +house of his married sister, with whom he intended to spend +Christmas, and that his sister lived on Upper Hill turnpike, on +which road the Collingwood house was situated, I proposed that we +should hire a sleigh together. + +"That will suit me," said Uncle Beamish. "There couldn't +have been a better fit if I had been measured for it. Less than +half a mile after you turn into the turnpike, you pass my +sister's house. Then you can drop me and go on to the +Collingwoods', which I should say isn't more than three miles +further." + +The arrangement was made, a horse and sleigh ordered, and +early in the afternoon we started from Warburton. + +The sleighing was good, but the same could not be said of the +horse. He was a big roan, powerful and steady, but entirely too +deliberate in action. Uncle Beamish, however, was quite +satisfied with him. + +"What you want when you are goin' to take a journey with a +horse," said he, "is stayin' power. Your fast trotter is all +very well for a mile or two, but if I have got to go into the +country in winter, give me a horse like this." + +I did not agree with him, but we jogged along quite pleasantly +until the afternoon grew prematurely dark and it began to snow. + +"Now," said I, giving the roan a useless cut, "what we ought to +have is a fast horse, so that we may get there before there is +a storm." + +"No, doctor, you're wrong," said Uncle Beamish. "What we +want is a strong horse that will take us there whether it storms +or not, and we have got him. And who cares for a little snow +that won't hurt nobody?" + +I did not care for snow, and we turned up our collars and +went as merrily as people can go to the music of slowly jingling +sleigh-bells. + +The snow began to fall rapidly, and, what was worse, the wind +blew directly in our faces, so that sometimes my eyes were so +plastered up with snowflakes that I could scarcely see how to +drive. I never knew snow to fall with such violence. The +roadway in front of us, as far as I could see it, was soon one +unbroken stretch of white from fence to fence. + +"This is the big storm of the season," said Uncle Beamish, +"and it is a good thing we started in time, for if the wind keeps +blowin', this road will be pretty hard to travel in a couple of +hours." + +In about half an hour the wind lulled a little and I could +get a better view of our surroundings, although I could not see +very far through the swiftly descending snow. + +"I was thinkin'," said Uncle Beamish, "that it might be a +good idee, when we get to Crocker's place, to stop a little, and +let you warm your fingers and nose. Crocker's is ruther more +than half-way to the pike." + +"Oh, I do not want to stop anywhere," I replied quickly. "I +am all right." + +Nothing was said for some time, and then Uncle Beamish remarked: + +"I don't want to stop any more than you do, but it does seem +strange that we ain't passed Crocker's yit. We could hardly miss +his house, it is so close to the road. This horse is slow, but I +tell you one thing, doctor, he's improvin'. He is goin' better +than he did. That's the way with this kind. It takes them a +good while to get warmed up, but they keep on gettin' fresher +instead of tireder." + +The big roan was going better, but still we did not reach +Crocker's, which disappointed Uncle Beamish, who wanted to be +assured that the greater part of his journey was over. + +"We must have passed it," he said, "when the snow was so +blindin'." + +I did not wish to discourage him by saying that I did not +think we had yet reached Crocker's, but I believed I had a much +better appreciation of our horse's slowness than he had. + +Again the wind began to blow in our faces, and the snow fell +faster, but the violence of the storm seemed to encourage our +horse, for his pace was now greatly increased. + +"That's the sort of beast to have," exclaimed Uncle Beamish, +spluttering as the snow blew in his mouth. "He is gettin' his +spirits up just when they are most wanted. We must have passed +Crocker's a good while ago, and it can't be long before we get to +the pike. And it's time we was there, for it's darkenin'." + +On and on we went, but still we did not reach the pike. +We had lost a great deal of time during the first part of the +journey, and although the horse was travelling so much better +now, his pace was below the average of good roadsters. + +"When we get to the pike," said Uncle Beamish, "you can't +miss it, for this road doesn't cross it. All you've got to do is +to turn to the left, and in ten minutes you will see the lights +in my sister's house. And I'll tell you, doctor, if you would +like to stop there for the night, she'd be mighty glad to have +you." + +"Much obliged," replied I, "but I shall go on. It's not late +yet, and I can reach the Collingwoods' in good time." + +We now drove on in silence, our horse actually arching his +neck as he thumped through the snow. Drifts had begun to form +across the road, but through these he bravely plunged. + +"Stayin' power is what we want, doctor!" exclaimed Uncle +Beamish. "Where would your fast trotter be in drifts like these, +I'd like to know? We got the right horse when we got this one, +but I wish we had been goin' this fast all the time." + +It grew darker and darker, but at last we saw, not far in +front of us, a light. + +"That beats me," said Uncle Beamish. "I don't remember no +other house so near the road. It can't be we ain't passed +Crocker's yit! If we ain't got no further than that, I'm in +favor of stoppin'. I'm not afraid of a snow-storm, but I ain't a +fool nuther, and if we haven't got further than Crocker's it will +be foolhardy to try to push on through the dark and these big +drifts, which will be gettin' bigger." + +I did not give it up so easily. I greatly wished to` +reach my destination that night. But there were three wills in +the party, and one of them belonged to the horse. Before I had +any idea of such a thing, the animal made a sudden turn,--too +sudden for safety,--passed through a wide gateway, and after a +few rapid bounds which, to my surprise, I could not restrain, he +stopped suddenly. + +"Hello!" exclaimed Uncle Beamish, peering forward, "here's a +barn door." And he immediately began to throw off the far robe +that covered our knees. + +"What are you going to do?" I asked. + +"I'm goin' to open the barn door and let the horse go in," +said he. "He seems to want to. I don't know whether this is +Crocker's barn or not. It don't look like it, but I may be +mistaken. Anyway, we will let the horse in, and then go to the +house. This ain't no night to be travellin' any further, doctor, +and that is the long and the short of it. If the people here +ain't Crockers, I guess they are Christians!" + +I had not much time to consider the situation, for while he +had been speaking, Uncle Beamish had waded through the snow, and +finding the barn door unfastened, had slid it to one side. +Instantly the horse entered the dark barn, fortunately finding +nothing in his way. + +"Now," said Uncle Beamish, "if we can get somethin' to tie +him with, so that he don't do no mischief, we can leave him here +and go up to the house." I carried a pocket lantern, and quickly +lighted it. "By George!" said Uncle Beamish, as I held up the +lantern, "this ain't much of a barn--it's no more than a wagon- +house. It ain't Crocker's--but no matter; we'll go up to the +house. Here is a hitchin'-rope." + +We fastened the horse, threw a robe over him, shut the barn +door behind us, and slowly made our way to the back of the house, +in which there was a lighted window. Mounting a little portico, +we reached a door, and were about to knock when it was opened for +us. A woman, plainly a servant, stood in a kitchen, light and +warm. + +"Come right in," she said. "I heard your bells. Did you put +your horse in the barn?" + +"Yes," said Uncle Beamish, "and now we would like to see--" + +"All right," interrupted the woman, moving toward an inner +door. "Just wait here for a minute. I'm going up to tell her." + +"I don't know this place," said Uncle Beamish, as we stood by +the kitchen stove, "but I expect it belongs to a widow woman." + +"What makes you think that?" I asked. + +"'Cause she said she was goin' to tell HER. If there had +been a man in the house, she would have gone to tell HIM." + +In a few moments the woman returned. + +"She says you are to take off your wet things and then go +into the sitting-room. She'll be down in a minute." + +I looked at Uncle Beamish, thinking it was his right to make +explanations, but, giving me a little wink, he began to take off +his overcoat. It was plain to perceive that Uncle Beamish +desired to assume that a place of refuge would be offered us. + +"It's an awful bad night," he said to the woman, as he sat +down to take off his arctic overshoes. + +"It's all that," said she. "You may hang your coats over +them chairs. It won't matter if they do drip on this bare floor. + +Now, then, come right into the sitting-room." + +In spite of my disappointment, I was glad to be in a warm house, +and hoped we might be able to stay there. I could hear the storm +beating furiously against the window-panes behind the drawn +shades. There was a stove in the sitting-room, and a large lamp. + +"Sit down," said the woman. "She will be here in a minute." + +"It strikes me," said Uncle Beamish, when we were left alone, +"that somebody is expected in this house, most likely to spend +Christmas, and that we are mistook for them, whoever they are." + +"I have the same idea," I replied, "and we must explain as +soon as possible." + +"Of course we will do that," said he, "but I can tell you one +thing: whoever is expected ain't comin', for he can't get here. +But we've got to stay here tonight, no matter who comes or +doesn't come, and we've got to be keerful in speakin' to the +woman of the house. If she is one kind of a person, we can offer +to pay for lodgin's and horse-feed; but if she is another kind, +we must steer clear of mentionin' pay, for it will make her +angry. You had better leave the explainin' business to me." + +I was about to reply that I was more than willing to do so +when the door opened and a person entered--evidently the mistress +of the house. She was tall and thin, past middle age, and +plainly dressed. Her pale countenance wore a defiant look, and +behind her spectacles blazed a pair of dark eyes, which, after +an instant's survey of her visitors, were fixed steadily +upon me. She made but a step into the room, and stood holding +the door. We both rose from our chairs. + +"You can sit down again," she said sharply to me. "I don't +want you. Now, sir," she continued, turning to Uncle Beamish, +"please come with me." + +Uncle Beamish gave a glance of surprise at me, but he +immediately followed the old lady out of the room, and the door +was closed behind them. + +For ten minutes, at least, I sat quietly waiting to see what +would happen next--very much surprised at the remark that had +been made to me, and wondering at Uncle Beamish's protracted +absence. Suddenly he entered the room and closed the door. + +"Here's a go!" said he, slapping his leg, but very gently. +"We're mistook the worst kind. We're mistook for doctors." +"That is only half a mistake," said I. "What is the matter, and +what can I do?" + +"Nothin'," said he, quickly,--"that is, nothin' your own +self. Just the minute she got me outside that door she began +pitchin' into you. `I suppose that's young Dr. Glover,' said +she. I told her it was, and then she went on to say, givin' me +no chance to explain nothin', that she didn't want to have +anything to do with you; that she thought it was a shame to turn +people's houses into paupers' hospitals for the purpose of +teachin' medical students; that she had heard of you, and what +she had heard she hadn't liked. All this time she kept goin' up- +stairs, and I follerin' her, and the fust thing I knowed she +opened a door and went into a room, and I went in after her, and +there, in a bed, was a patient of some kind. I was took +back dreadful, for the state of the case came to me like a flash. + +Your uncle had been sent for, and I was mistook for him. Now, +what to say was a puzzle to me, and I began to think pretty fast. + +It was an awkward business to have to explain things to that +sharp-set old woman. The fact is, I didn't know how to begin, +and was a good deal afraid, besides, but she didn't give me no +time for considerin'. `I think it's her brain,' said she, `but +perhaps you'll know better. Catherine, uncover your head!' And +with that the patient turned over a little and uncovered her +head, which she had had the sheet over. It was a young woman, +and she gave me a good look, but she didn't say nothin'. Now I +WAS in a state of mind." + +"Of course you must have been," I answered. "Why didn't you +tell her that you were not a doctor, but that I was. It would +have been easy enough to explain matters. She might have thought +my uncle could not come and he had sent me, and that you had come +along for company. The patient ought to be attended to without +delay." + +"She's got to be-attended to," said Uncle Beamish, "or else +there will be a row and we'll have to travel--storm or no storm. +But if you had heard what that old woman said about young +doctors, and you in particular, you would know that you wasn't +goin' to have anything to do with this case--at least, you +wouldn't show in it. But I've got no more time for talkin'. I +came down here on business. When the old lady said, `Catherine, +hold out your hand!' and she held it out, I had nothin' to do but +step up and feel her pulse. I know how to do that, for I have +done a lot of nussin' in my life. And then it seemed nat'ral to +ask her to put out her tongue, and when she did it I +gave a look at it and nodded my head. `Do you think it is her +brain?' said the old woman, half whisperin'. `Can't say anything +about that yit,' said I. `I must go down-stairs and get the +medicine-case. The fust thing to do is to give her a draught, +and I will bring it up to her as soon as it is mixed.' You have +got a pocket medicine-case with you, haven't you?" + +"Oh, yes," said I. "It is in my overcoat." + +"I knowed it," said Uncle Beamish. "An old doctor might go +visitin' without his medicine-case, but a young one would be sure +to take it along, no matter where he was goin'. Now you get it, +please, quick." + +"My notion is," said he, when I returned from the kitchen +with the case, "that you mix somethin' that might soothe her a +little, if she has got anything the matter with her brain, and +which won't hurt her if she hasn't. And then, when I take it up +to her, you tell me what symptoms to look for. I can do it--I +have spent nights lookin' for symptoms. Then, when I come down +and report, you might send her up somethin' that would keep her +from gettin' any wuss till the doctor can come in the mornin', +for he ain't comin' here to-night." + +"A very good plan," said I. "Now, what can I give her? What +is the patient's age?" + +"Oh, her age don't matter much," said Uncle Beamish, +impatiently. "She may be twenty, more or less, and any mild +stuff will do to begin with." + +"I will give her some sweet spirits of nitre," said I, taking +out a little vial. "Will you ask the servant for a glass of +water and a teaspoon?" + +"Now," said I, when I had quickly prepared the mixture, "she +can have a teaspoonful of this, and another in ten minutes, and +then we will see whether we will go on with it or not." + +"And what am I to look for?" said he. + +"In the first place," said I, producing a clinical thermometer, +"you must take her temperature. You know how to do that?" + +"Oh, yes," said he. "I have done it hundreds of times. She +must hold it in her mouth five minutes." + +"Yes, and while you are waiting," I continued, "you must try +to find out, in the first place, if there are, or have been, any +signs of delirium. You might ask the old lady, and besides, you +may be able to judge for yourself." + +"I can do that," said he. "I have seen lots of it." + +"Then, again," said I, "you must observe whether or not her +pupils are dilated. You might also inquire whether there had +been any partial paralysis or numbness in any part of the body. +These things must be looked for in brain trouble. Then you can +come down, ostensibly to prepare another prescription, and when +you have reported, I have no doubt I can give you something which +will modify, or I should say--" + +"Hold her where she is till mornin'," said Uncle Beamish. "That's +what you mean. Be quick. Give me that thermometer and the +tumbler, and when I come down again, I reckon you can fit her +out with a prescription just as good as anybody." + +He hurried away, and I sat down to consider. I was full of +ambition, full of enthusiasm for the practice of my profession. +I would have been willing to pay largely for the privilege +of undertaking an important case by myself, in which it would +depend upon me whether or not I should call in a consulting +brother. So far, in the cases I had undertaken, a consulting +brother had always called himself in--that is, I had practised in +hospitals or with my uncle. Perhaps it might be found necessary, +notwithstanding all that had been said against me, that I should +go up to take charge of this case. I wished I had not forgotten +to ask the old man how he had found the tongue and pulse. + +In less than a quarter of an hour Uncle Beamish returned. + +"Well," said I, quickly, "what are the symptoms?" + +"I'll give them to you," said he, taking his seat. "I'm not +in such a hurry now, because I told the old woman I would like to +wait a little and see how that fust medicine acted. The patient +spoke to me this time. When I took the thermometer out of her +mouth she says, `You are comin' up ag'in, doctor?' speakin' low +and quickish, as if she wanted nobody but me to hear." + +"But how about the symptoms?" said I, impatiently. + +"Well," he answered, "in the fust place her temperature is +ninety-eight and a half, and that's about nat'ral, I take it." + +"Yes," I said, "but you didn't tell me about her tongue and +pulse." + +"There wasn't nothin' remarkable about them," said he. + +"All of which means," I remarked, "that there is no +fever. But that is not at all a necessary accompaniment of brain +derangements. How about the dilatation of her pupils?" + +"There isn't none," said Uncle Beamish; "they are ruther +squinched up, if anything. And as to delirium, I couldn't see no +signs of it, and when I asked the old lady about the numbness, +she said she didn't believe there had been any." + +"No tendency to shiver, no disposition to stretch?" + +"No," said the old man, "no chance for quinine." + +"The trouble is," said I, standing before the stove and +fixing my mind upon the case with earnest intensity, "that there +are so few symptoms in brain derangement. If I could only get +hold of something tangible--" + +"If I was you," interrupted Uncle Beamish, "I wouldn't try to +get hold of nothin'. I would just give her somethin' to keep her +where she is till mornin'. If you can do that, I'll guarantee +that any good doctor can take her up and go on with her to- +morrow." + +Without noticing the implication contained in these remarks, I +continued my consideration of the case. + +"If I could get a drop of her blood," said I. + +"No, no!" exclaimed Uncle Beamish, "I'm not goin' to do +anything of that sort. What in the name of common sense would +you do with her blood?" + +"I would examine it microscopically," I said. "I might find +out all I want to know." + +Uncle Beamish did not sympathize with this method of diagnosis. + +"If you did find out there was the wrong kind of germs, you +couldn't do anything with them to-night, and it would just worry +you," said the old man. "I believe that nature will get +along fust-rate without any help, at least till mornin'. But +you've got to give her some medicine--not so much for her good as +for our good. If she's not treated we're bounced. Can't you +give her somethin' that would do anybody good, no matter what's +the matter with 'em? If it was the spring of the year I would +say sarsaparilla. If you could mix her up somethin' and put into +it some of them benevolent microbes the doctors talk about, it +would be a good deed to do to anybody." + +"The benign bacilli," said I. "Unfortunately I haven't any +of them with me." + +"And if you had," he remarked, "I'd be in favor of givin' 'em +to the old woman. I take it they would do, her more good than +anybody else. Come along now, doctor; it is about time for me to +go up-stairs and see how the other stuff acted--not on the +patient, I don't mean, but on the old woman. The fact is, you +know, it's her we're dosin'." + +"Not at all," said I, speaking a little severely. "I am +trying to do my very best for the patient, but I fear I cannot do +it without seeing her. Don't you think that if you told the old +lady how absolutely necessary--" + +"Don't say anything more about that!" exclaimed Uncle Beamish. +"I hoped I wouldn't have to mention it, but she told me ag'in +that she would never have one of those unfledged medical +students, just out of the egg-shell, experimentin' on any of her +family, and from what she said about you in particular, I should +say she considered you as a medical chick without even down on +you." + +"What can she know of me?" I asked indignantly. + +"Give it up," said he. "Can't guess it. But that ain't the +p'int. The p'int is, what are you goin' to give her? When I was +young the doctors used to say, When you are in doubt, give +calomel--as if you were playin' trumps." + +"Nonsense, nonsense," said I, my eyes earnestly fixed upon my +open medical case. + +"I suppose a mustard-plaster on the back of her neck--" + +"Wouldn't do at all," I interrupted. "Wait a minute, now-- +yes--I know what I will do: I will give her sodium bromide--ten +grains." + +"`Which will hit if it's a deer and miss if it's a calf' as +the hunter said?" inquired Uncle Beamish. + +"It will certainly not injure her," said I, "and I am quite +sure it will be a positive advantage. If there has been cerebral +disturbance, which has subsided temporarily, it will assist her +to tide over the interim before its recurrence." + +"All right," said Uncle Beamish, "give it to me, and I'll be +off. It's time I showed up ag'in." + +He did not stay up-stairs very long this time. + +"No symptoms yit, but the patient looked at me as if she +wanted to say somethin'; but she didn't git no chance, for the +old lady set herself down as if she was planted in a garden-bed +and intended to stay there. But the patient took the medicine as +mild as a lamb." + +"That is very good," said I. "It may be that she appreciates +the seriousness of her ewe better than we do." + +"I should say she wants to git well," he replied. "She looks +like that sort of a person to me. The old woman said she thought +we would have to stay awhile till the storm slackened, and I +said, yes, indeed, and there wasn't any chance of its slackenin' +to-night; besides, I wanted to see the patient before bedtime." + +At this moment the door opened and the servant-woman came in. + +"She says you are to have supper, and it will be ready in +about half an hour. One of you had better go out and attend to +your horse, for the man is not coming back to-night." + +"I will go to the barn," said I, rising. Uncle Beamish also +rose and said he would go with me. + +"I guess you can find some hay and oats," said the woman, as +we were putting on our coats and overshoes in the kitchen, "and +here's a lantern. We don't keep no horse now, but there's feed +left." + +As we pushed through the deep snow into the barn, Uncle +Beamish said: + +"I've been tryin' my best to think where we are without +askin' any questions, and I'm dead beat. I don't remember no +such house as this on the road." + +"Perhaps we got off the road," said I. + +"That may be," said he, as we entered the barn. "It's a straight +road from Warburton to the pike near my sister's house, but +there's two other roads that branch off to the right and strike +the pike further off to the east. Perhaps we got on one of them +in all that darkness and perplexin' whiteness, when it wasn't +easy to see whether we were keepin' a straight road or not." + +The horse neighed as we approached with a light. + +"I would not be at all surprised," said I, "if this horse had +once belonged here and that was the reason why, as soon as +he got a chance, he turned and made straight for his old home." + +"That isn't unlikely," said Uncle Beamish, "and that's the +reason we did not pass Crocker's. But here we are, wherever it +is, and here we've got to stay till mornin'." + +We found hay and oats and a pump in the corner of the wagon- +house, and having put the horse in the stall and made him as +comfortable as possible with some old blankets, we returned to +the house, bringing our valises with us. + +Our supper was served in the sitting-room because there was a +good fire there, and the servant told us we would have to eat by +ourselves, as "she" was not coming down. + +"We'll excuse her," said Uncle Beamish, with an alacrity of +expression that might have caused suspicion. + +We had a good supper, and were then shown a room on the first +floor on the other side of the hall, where the servant said we +were to sleep. + +We sat by the stove awhile, waiting for developments, but as +Uncle Beamish's bedtime was rapidly approaching, he sent word to +the sick-chamber that he was coming up for his final visit. + +This time he stayed up-stairs but a few minutes. + +"She's fast asleep," said he, "and the old woman says she'll +call me if I'm needed in the night, and you'll have to jump up +sharp and overhaul that medicine-case if that happens." + +The next morning, and very early in the morning, I was awaked +by Uncle Beamish, who stood at my side. + +"Look here," said he, "I've been outside. It's stopped snowin' +and it's clearin' off. I've been to the barn and I've fed the +horse, and I tell you what I'm in favor of doin'. There's nobody +up yit, and I don't want to stay here and make no explanations to +that old woman. I don't fancy gittin' into rows on Christmas +mornin'. We've done all the good we can here, and the best thing +we can do now is to git away before anybody is up, and leave a +note sayin' that we've got to go on without losin' time, and that +we will send another doctor as soon as possible. My sister's +doctor don't live fur away from her, and I know she will be +willin' to send for him. Then our duty will be done, and what +the old woman thinks of us won't make no, difference to nobody." + +"That plan suits me," said I, rising. "I don't want to stay +here, and as I am not to be allowed to see the patient, there is +no reason why I should stay. What we have done will more than +pay for our supper and lodgings, so that our consciences are +clear." + +"But you must write a note," said Uncle Beamish. "Got any +paper?" + +I tore a leaf from my note-book, and went to the window, +where it was barely light enough for me to see how to write. + +"Make it short," said the old man. "I'm awful fidgety to git +off." + +I made it very short, and then, valises in hand, we quietly +took our way to the kitchen. + +"How this floor does creak!" said Uncle Beamish. "Git on +your overcoat and shoes as quick as you can, and we'll leave the +note on this table." + +I had just shaken myself into my overcoat when Uncle Beamish gave +a subdued exclamation, and quickly turning, I saw entering the +kitchen a female figure in winter wraps and carrying a hand-bag. + +"By George!" whispered the old man, "it's the patient!" + +The figure advanced directly toward me. + +"Oh, Dr. Glover!" she whispered, "I am so glad to get down +before you went away!" + +I stared in amazement at the speaker, but even in the dim light I +recognized her. This was the human being whose expected presence +at the Collingwood mansion was taking me there to spend +Christmas. + +"Kitty!" I exclaimed--"Miss Burroughs, I mean,--what is the +meaning of this?" + +"Don't ask me for any meanings now," she said. "I want you +and your uncle to take me to the Collingwoods'. I suppose you +are on your way there, for they wrote you were coming. And oh! +let us be quick, for I'm afraid Jane will come down, and she will +be sure to wake up aunty. I saw one of you go out to the barn, +and knew you intended to leave, so I got ready just as fast as I +could. But I must leave some word for aunty." + +"I have written a note," said I. "But are you well enough to +travel?" + +"Just let me add a line to it," said she. "I am as well as I +ever was." + +I gave her a pencil, and she hurriedly wrote something on the +paper which I had left on the kitchen table. Then, quickly +glancing around, she picked up a large carving-fork, and sticking +it through the paper into the soft wood of the table, she left it +standing there. + +"Now it won't blow away when we open the door," she +whispered. "Come on." + +"You cannot go out to the barn," I said; "we will bring up +the sleigh." + +"Oh, no, no, no," she answered, "I must not wait here. If I +once get out of the house I shall feel safe. Of course I shall +go anyway, but I don't want any quarrelling on this Christmas +morning." + +"I'm with you there," said Uncle Beamish, approvingly. "Doctor, +we can take her to the barn without her touching the snow. Let +her sit in this arm-chair, and we can carry her between us. +She's no weight." + +In half a minute the kitchen door was softly closed behind +us, and we were carrying Miss Burroughs to the barn. My soul was +in a wild tumult. Dozens of questions were on my tongue, but I +had no chance to ask any of them. + +Uncle Beamish and I returned to the porch for the valises, +and then, closing the back door, we rapidly began to make +preparations for leaving. + +"I suppose," said Uncle Beamish, as we went into the stable, +leaving Miss Burroughs in the wagon-house, "that this business is +all right? You seem to know the young woman, and she is of age +to act for herself." + + "Whatever she wants to do," I answered, "is perfectly right. +You may trust to that. I do not understand the matter any more +than you do, but I know she is expected at the Collingwoods', and +wants to go there." + +"Very good," said Uncle Beamish. "We'll git away fust and +ask explanations afterwards." + +"Dr. Glover," said Miss Burroughs, as we led the horse into the +wagon-house, "don't put the bells on him. Stuff them gently +under the seat--as softly as you can. But how are we all to go +away? I have been looking at that sleigh, and it is intended +only for two." + +"It's rather late to think of that, miss," said Uncle Beamish, +"but there's one thing that's certain. We're both very polite to +ladies, but neither of us is willin' to be left behind on this +trip. But it's a good-sized sleigh, and we'll all pack in, well +enough. You and me can sit on the seat, and the doctor can stand +up in front of us and drive. In old times it was considered the +right thing for the driver of the sleigh to stand up and do his +drivin'." + +The baggage was carefully stowed away, and, after a look around +the dimly lighted wagon-house, Miss Burroughs and Uncle Beamish +got into the sleigh, and I tucked the big fur robe around them. + +"I hate to make a journey before breakfast," said Uncle +Beamish, as I was doing this, "especially on Christmas mornin', +but somehow or other there seems to be somethin' jolly about this +business, and we won't have to wait so long for breakfast, +nuther. It can't be far from my sister's, and we'll all stop +there and have breakfast. Then you two can leave me and go on. +She'll be as glad to see any friends of mine as if they were her +own. And she'll be pretty sure, on a mornin' like this, to have +buckwheat cakes and sausages." + +Miss Burroughs looked at the old man with a puzzled air, but +she asked him no questions. + +"How are you going to keep yourself warm, Dr. Glover?" she +said. + +"Oh, this long ulster will be enough for me," I replied, "and +as I shall stand up, I could not use a robe, if we had another." + +In fact, the thought of being with Miss Burroughs and the +anticipation of a sleigh-ride alone with her after we had +left Uncle Beamish with his sister, had put me into such a glow +that I scarcely knew it was cold weather. + +"You'd better be keerful, doctor," said Uncle Beamish. "You +don't want to git rheumatism in your j'ints on this Christmas +mornin'. Here's this horse-blanket that we are settin' on. We +don't need it, and you'd better wrap it round you, after you git +in, to keep your legs warm." + +"Oh, do! " said Miss Burroughs. "It may look funny, but we +will not meet anybody so early as this." + +"All right!" said I, "and now we are ready to start." + +I slid back the barn door and then led the horse outside. +Closing the door, and making as little noise as possible in doing +it, I got into the sleigh, finding plenty of room to stand up in +front of my companions. Now I wrapped the horse-blanket about +the lower part of my body, and as I had no belt with which to +secure it, Miss Burroughs kindly offered to fasten it round my +waist by means of a long pin which she took from her hat. It is +impossible to describe the exhilaration that pervaded me as she +performed this kindly office. After thanking her warmly, I took +the reins and we started. + +"It is so lucky," whispered Miss Burroughs, "that I happened +to think about the bells. We don't make any noise at all." + +This was true. The slowly uplifted hoofs of the horse +descended quietly into the soft snow, and the sleigh-runners +slipped along without a sound. + +"Drive straight for the gate, doctor," whispered Uncle +Beamish. "It don't matter nothin' about goin' over flower-beds +and grass-plats in such weather." + +I followed his advice, for no roadway could be seen. But we +had gone but a short distance when the horse suddenly stopped. + +"What's the matter?" asked Miss Burroughs, in a low voice. +"Is it too deep for him?" + +"We're in a drift," said Uncle Beamish. "But it's not too +deep. Make him go ahead, doctor." + +I clicked gently and tapped the horse with the whip, but he +did not move. + +"What a dreadful thing," whispered Miss Burroughs, leaning +forward, "for him to stop so near the house! Dr. Glover, what +does this mean?" And, as she spoke, she half rose behind me. +"Where did Sir Rohan come from?" + +"Who's he?" asked Uncle Beamish, quickly. + +"That horse," she answered. "That's my aunt's horse. She +sold him a few days ago." + +"By George! " ejaculated Uncle Beamish, unconsciously raising +his voice a little. "Wilson bought him, and his bringin' us here +is as plain as A B C. And now he don't want to leave home." + +"But he has got to do it," said I, jerking the horse's head +to one side and giving him a cut with the whip. + +"Don't whip him," whispered Miss Burroughs; "it always makes +him more stubborn. How glad I am I thought of the bells! The +only way to get him to go is to mollify him." + +"But how is that to be done?" I asked anxiously. + +"You must give him sugar and pat his neck. If I had some sugar +and could get out--" + +"But you haven't it, and you can't git out," said Uncle +Beamish. "Try him again doctor!" + +I jerked the reins impatiently. "Go along!" said I. But he +did not go along. + +"Haven't you got somethin' in your medicine-case you could +mollify him with?" said Uncle Beamish. "Somethin' sweet +that he might like?" + +For an instant I caught at this absurd suggestion, and my +mind ran over the contents of my little bottles. If I had known +his character, some sodium bromide in his morning feed might, by +this time, have mollified his obstinacy. + +"If I could be free of this blanket," said I, fumbling at the +pin behind me, "I would get out and lead him into the road." + +"You could not do it," said Miss Burroughs. "You might pull +his head off, but he wouldn't move. I have seen him tried." + +At this moment a window-sash in the second story of the house +was raised, and there, not thirty feet from us, stood an elderly +female, wrapped in a gray shawl, with piercing eyes shining +through great spectacles. + +"You seem to be stuck," said she, sarcastically. "You are +worse stuck than the fork was in my kitchen table." + +We made no answer. I do not know how Miss Burroughs looked +or felt, or what was the appearance of Uncle Beamish, but I know +I must have been very red in the face. I gave the horse a +powerful crack and shouted to him to go on. There was no need +for low speaking now. + +"You needn't be cruel to dumb animals," said the old lady, +"and you can't budge him. He never did like snow, +especially in going away from home. You cut a powerful queer +figure, young man, with that horse-blanket around you. You don't +look much like a practising physician." + +"Miss Burroughs," I exclaimed, "please take that pin out of +this blanket. If I can get at his head I know I can pull him +around and make him go." + +But she did not seem to hear me. "Aunty," she cried, "it's a +shame to stand there and make fun of us. We have got a perfect +right to go away if we want to, and we ought not to be laughed +at." + +The old lady paid no attention to this remark. + +"And there's that false doctor," she said. "I wonder how he +feels just now." + +"False doctor!" exclaimed Miss Burroughs. "I don't understand." + +"Young lady," said Uncle Beamish, "I'm no false doctor. I +intended to tell you all about it as soon as I got a chance, but +I haven't had one. And, old lady, I'd like you to know that I +don't say I'm a doctor, but I do say I'm a nuss, and a good nuss, +and you can't deny it." + +To this challenge the figure at the window made no answer. + +"Catherine," said she, "I can't stand here and take cold, but +I just want to know one thing: Have you positively made up your +mind to marry that young doctor in the horse-blanket?" + +This question fell like a bomb-shell into the middle of the +stationary sleigh. + +I had never asked Kitty to marry me. I loved her with all my +heart and soul, and I hoped, almost believed, that she loved me. +It had been my intention, when we should be left together in +the sleigh this morning, after dropping Uncle Beamish at his +sister's house, to ask her to marry me. + +The old woman's question pierced me as if it had been a flash +of lightning coming through the frosty air of a winter morning. +I dropped the useless reins and turned. Kitty's face was ablaze. +She made a movement as if she was about to jump out of the sleigh +and flee. + +"Oh, Kitty!" said I, bending down toward her, "tell her yes! +I beg I entreat, I implore you to tell her yes! Oh, Kitty! if +you don't say yes I shall never know another happy day." + +For one moment Kitty looked up into my face, and then said she: + +"It is my positive intention to marry him!" + +With the agility of a youth, Uncle Beamish threw the robe +from him and sprang out into the deep snow. Then, turning toward +us, he took off his hat. + +"By George!" said he, "you're a pair of trumps. I never did +see any human bein's step up to the mark more prompt. Madam," he +cried, addressing the old lady, "you ought to be the proudest +woman in this county at seein' such a thing as this happen under +your window of a Christmas mornin'. And now the best thing that +you can do is to invite us all in to have breakfast." +"You'll have to come in," said she, "or else stay out there +and freeze to death, for that horse isn't going to take you away. + +And if my niece really intends to marry the young man, and has +gone so far as to start to run away with him,--and with a false +doctor,--of course I've got no more to say about it, and you +can come in and have breakfast." And with that she shut down +the window. + +"That's talkin'," said Uncle Beamish. "Sit still, doctor, +and I'll lead him around to the back door. I guess he'll move +quick enough when you want him to turn back." + +Without the slightest objection Sir Rohan permitted himself +to be turned back and led up to the kitchen porch. + +"Now you two sparklin' angels get out," said Uncle Beamish, +"and go in. I'll attend to the horse." + +Jane, with a broad grin on her face, opened the kitchen door. + +"Merry Christmas to you both!" said she. + +"Merry Christmas!" we cried, and each of us shook her by the +hand. + +"Go in the sitting-room and get warm," said Jane. "She'll be +down pretty soon." + +I do not know how long we were together in that sitting-room. We +had thousands of things to say, and we said most of them. +Among other things, we managed to get in some explanations of the +occurrences of the previous night. Kitty told her tale briefly. +She and her aunt, to whom she was making a visit, and who wanted +her to make her house her home, had had a quarrel two days +before. Kitty was wild to go to the Collingwoods', and the old +lady, who, for some reason, hated the family, was determined she +should not go. But Kitty was immovable, and never gave up until +she found that her aunt had gone so far as to dispose of her +horse, thus making it impossible to travel in such weather, there +being no public conveyances passing the house. Kitty was an +orphan, and had a guardian who would have come to her aid, but +she could not write to him in time, and, in utter despair, she +went to bed. She would not eat or drink, she would not speak, +and she covered up her head. + +"After a day and a night," said Kitty, "aunty got dreadfully +frightened and thought something was the matter with my brain. +Her family are awfully anxious about their brains. I knew she +had sent for the doctor and I was glad of it, for I thought he +would help me. I must say I was surprised when I first saw that +Mr. Beamish, for I thought he was Dr. Morris. Now tell me about +your coming here." + +"And so," she said, when I had finished, "you had no idea +that you were prescribing for me! Please do tell me what were +those medicines you sent up to me and which I took like a truly +good girl." + +"I didn't know it at the time," said I, "but I sent you sixty +drops of the deepest, strongest love in a glass of water, and ten +grains of perfect adoration." + +"Nonsense!" said Kitty, with a blush, and at that moment +Uncle Beamish knocked at the door. + +"I thought I'd just step in and tell you," said he, "that +breakfast will be comin' along in a minute. I found they were +goin' to have buckwheat cakes, anyway, and I prevailed on Jane to +put sausages in the bill of fare. Merry Christmas to you both! +I would like to say more, but here comes the old lady and Jane." + +The breakfast was a strange meal, but a very happy one. The +old lady was very dignified. She made no allusion to Christmas +or to what had happened, but talked to Uncle Beamish about +people in Warburton. + +I have a practical mind, and, in spite of the present joy, I +could not help feeling a little anxiety about what was to be done +when breakfast was over. But just as we were about to rise from +the table we were all startled by a great jingle of sleigh-bells +outside. The old lady arose and stopped to the window. + +"There!" said she, turning toward us. "Here's a pretty +kettle of fish! There's a two-horse sleigh outside, with a man +driving, and a gentleman in the back seat who I am sure is Dr. +Morris, and he has come all the way on this bitter cold morning +to see the patient I sent for him to come to. Now, who is going +to tell him he has come on a fool's errand?" + +"Fool's errand!" I cried. "Every one of you wait in here and +I'll go out and tell him." + +When I dashed out of doors and stood by the side of my +uncle's sleigh, he was truly an amazed man. + +"I will get in, uncle," said I, "and if you will let John +drive the horses slowly around the yard, I will tell you how I +happen to be here." + +The story was a much longer one than I expected it to be, and +John must have driven those horses backward and forward for half +an hour. + +"Well," said my uncle, at last, "I never saw your Kitty, but +I knew her father and her mother, and I will go in and take a +look at her. If I like her, I will take you all on to the +Collingwoods', and drop Uncle Beamish at his sister's house." + +"I'll tell you what it is, young doctor," said Uncle Beamish, at +parting, "you ought to buy that big roan horse. He has been +a regular guardian angel to us this Christmas." + +"Oh, that would never do at all," cried Kitty. "His patients +would all die before he got there." + +"That is, if they had anything the matter with them," added +my uncle. + + + + A PIECE OF RED CALICO + +Before beginning the relation of the following incidents, I wish +to state that I am a young married man, doing business in a large +city, in the suburbs of which I live. + +I was going into town the other morning, when my wife handed +me a little piece of red calico, and asked me if I would have +time, during the day, to buy her two yards and a half of calico +like it. I assured her that it would be no trouble at all, and +putting the piece of calico in my pocket, I took the train for +the city. + +At lunch-time I stopped in at a large dry-goods store to +attend to my wife's commission. I saw a well-dressed man walking +the floor between the counters, where long lines of girls were +waiting on much longer lines of customers, and asked him where I +could see some red calico. + +"This way, sir," and he led me up the store. "Miss Stone," +said he to a young lady, "show this gentleman some red calico." + +"What shade do you want!" asked Miss Stone. + +I showed her the little piece of calico that my wife had +given me. She looked at it and handed it back to me. Then +she took down a great roll of red calico and spread it out on the +counter. + +"Why, that isn't the shade!" said I. + +"No, not exactly," said she. "But it is prettier than your +sample." + +"That may be," said I. "But, you see, I want to match this +piece. There is something already in my house, made of this kind +of calico, which needs to be made larger, or mended, or +something. I want some calico of the same shade." + +The girl made no answer, but took down another roll. + +"That's the shade," said she. + +"Yes," I replied, "but it's striped." + +"Stripes are more worn than anything else in calicoes," said +she. + + "Yes. But this isn't to be worn. It's for furniture, I +think. At any rate, I want perfectly plain stuff, to match +something already in use." + +"Well, I don't think you can find it perfectly plain, unless +you get Turkey red." + +"What is Turkey red?" I asked. + +"Turkey red is perfectly plain in calicoes," she answered. + +"Well, let me see some." + +"We haven't any Turkey red calico left," she said, "but we +have some very nice plain calicoes in other colors." + +"I don't want any other color. I want stuff to match this." + +"It's hard to match cheap calico like that," she said, and so +I left her. + +I next went into a store a few doors farther up Broadway. When I +entered I approached the "floorwalker," and handing him my +sample, said: + +"Have you any calico like this?" + +"Yes, sir," said he. "Third counter to the right." I went +to the third counter to the right, and showed my sample to the +salesman in attendance there. He looked at it on both sides. +Then he said: + +"We haven't any of this." + +"The floorwalker said you had," said I. + +"We had it, but we're out of it now. You'll get that +goods at an upholsterers." + +I went across the street to an upholsterer's. + +"Have you any stuff like this?" I asked. + +"No," said the salesman, "we haven't. Is it for furniture?" + +"Yes," I replied. + +"Then Turkey red is what you want." + +"Is Turkey red just like this?" I asked. + +"No," said he, "but it's much better." + +"That makes no difference to me," I replied. "I want +something just like this." + +"But they don't use that for furniture," he said. + +"I should think people could use anything they wanted for +furniture," I remarked, somewhat sharply. + +"They can, but they don't," he said quite calmly. "They +don't use red like that. They use Turkey red." + +I said no more, but left. The next place I visited was a +very large dry-goods store. Of the first salesman I saw I +inquired if they kept red calico like my sample. + +"You'll find that on the second story," said he. + +I went up-stairs. There I asked a man: + +"Where shall I find red calico?" + +"In the far room to the left," and he pointed to a distant +corner. + +I walked through the crowds of purchasers and salespeople, +around the counters and tables filled with goods, to the far room +to the left. When I got there I asked for red calico. + +"The second counter down this side," said the man. I went +there and produced my sample. "Calicoes down-stairs," said the +man. + +"They told me they were up here," I said. + +"Not these plain goods. You'll find them downstairs at the +back of the store, over on that side." + +I went down-stairs to the back of the store. + +"Where can I find red calico like this?" I asked. + +"Next counter but one, " said the man addressed, walking with +me in the direction pointed out. "Dunn, show red calicoes." + +Mr. Dunn took my sample and looked at it. "We haven't this shade +in that quality of goods," he said. + +"Well, have you it in any quality of goods?" I asked. + +"Yes. We've got it finer." He took down a piece of calico, +and unrolled a yard or two of it. + +"That's not this shade," I said. + +"No," said he. "The goods is finer and the color's better." + +"I want it to match this," I said. + +"I thought you weren't particular about the match," said the +salesman. "You said you didn't care for the quality of the +goods, and you know you can't match without you take into +consideration quality and color both. If you want that +quality of goods in red, you ought to get Turkey red." + +I did not think it necessary to answer this remark, but said: + +"Then you've got nothing to match this?" + +"No, sir. But perhaps they may have it in the upholstery +department, in the sixth story." + +I got into the elevator and went up to the top of the house. + +"Have you any red stuff like this?" I said to a young man. + +"Red stuff? Upholstery department--other end of this floor." + +I went to the other end of the floor. + +"I want some red calico," I said to a man. + +"Furniture goods?" he asked. + +"Yes," said I. + +"Fourth counter to the left." + +I went to the fourth counter to the left, and showed my +sample to a salesman. He looked at it, and said: "You'll get +this down on the first floor--calico department." + +I turned on my heel, descended in the elevator, and went out +on Broadway. I was thoroughly sick of red calico. But I +determined to make one more trial. My wife had bought her red +calico not long before, and there must be some to be had +somewhere. I ought to have asked her where she bought it, but I +thought a simple little thing like that could be procured +anywhere. + +I went into another large dry-goods store. As I entered the +door a sudden tremor seized me. I could not bear to take out +that piece of red calico. If I had had any other kind of a +rag about me--a pen-wiper or anything of the sort--I think I +would have asked them if they could match that. + +But I stepped up to a young woman and presented my sample, +with the usual question. + +"Back room, counter on the left," she said. + +I went there. + +"Have you any red calico like this?" I asked of the lady +behind the counter. + +"No, sir," she said, "but we have it in Turkey red." + +Turkey red again! I surrendered. + +"All right," I said. "Give me Turkey red." + +"How much, sir?" she asked. + +"I don't know--say five yards." + +The lady looked at me rather strangely, but measured off five +yards of Turkey red calico. Then she rapped on the counter and +called out, "Cash!" A little girl, with yellow hair in two long +plaits, came slowly up. The lady wrote the number of yards; the +name of the goods; her own number; the price; the amount of the +bank-note I handed her; and some other matters--probably the +color of my eyes and the direction and velocity of the wind--on a +slip of paper. She then copied all this in a little book which +she kept by her. Then she handed the slip of paper, the money, +and the Turkey red to the yellow-haired girl. This young girl +copied the slip in a little book she carried, and then she went +away with the calico, the paper slip, and the money. + +After a very long time--during which the little girl probably +took the goods, the money, and the slip to some central desk, +where the note was received, its amount and number entered in a +book; change given to the girl; a copy of the slip made and +entered; girl's entry examined and approved; goods wrapped up; +girl registered; plaits counted and entered on a slip of paper +and copied by the girl in her book; girl taken to a hydrant and +washed; number of towel entered on a paper slip and copied by the +girl in her book; value of my note and amount of change branded +somewhere on the child, and said process noted on a slip of paper +and copied in her book--the girl came to me, bringing my change +and the package of Turkey red calico. + I had time for but very little work at the office that +afternoon, and when I reached home I handed the package of calico +to my wife. She unrolled it and exclaimed: + +"Why, this doesn't match the piece I gave you!" + +"Match it!" I cried. "Oh no! it doesn't match it. You +didn't want that matched. You were mistaken. What you wanted +was Turkey red--third counter to the left. I mean, Turkey red is +what they use!" + +My wife looked at me in amazement, and then I detailed to her +my troubles. + +"Well," said she, "this Turkey red is a great deal prettier +than what I had, and you've bought so much of it that I needn't +use the other at all. I wish I had thought of Turkey red +before." + +"I wish from my heart you had!" said I. + + + + THE CHRISTMAS WRECK + +"Well, sir," said old Silas, as he gave a preliminary puff to the +pipe he had just lighted, and so satisfied himself that the +draught was all right, "the wind's a-comin', an' so's Christmas. +But it's no use bein' in a hurry fur either of 'em, fur sometimes +they come afore you want 'em, anyway." + +Silas was sitting in the stern of a small sailing-boat which +he owned, and in which he sometimes took the Sandport visitors +out for a sail, and at other times applied to its more legitimate +but less profitable use, that of fishing. That afternoon he had +taken young Mr. Nugent for a brief excursion on that portion of +the Atlantic Ocean which sends its breakers up on the beach of +Sandport. But he had found it difficult, nay, impossible, just +now, to bring him back, for the wind had gradually died away +until there was not a breath of it left. Mr. Nugent, to whom +nautical experiences were as new as the very nautical suit of +blue flannel which he wore, rather liked the calm. It was such a +relief to the monotony of rolling waves. He took out a cigar and +lighted it, and then he remarked: + +"I can easily imagine how a wind might come before you sailors +might want it, but I don't see how Christmas could come too +soon." + +"It come wunst on me when things couldn't `a' looked more +onready fur it," said Silas. + +"How was that?" asked Mr. Nugent, settling himself a little +more comfortably on the hard thwart. "If it's a story, let's +have it. This is a good time to spin a yarn." + +"Very well," said old Silas. "I'll spin her." + +The bare-legged boy whose duty it was to stay forward and +mind the jib came aft as soon as he smelt a story, and took a +nautical position, which was duly studied by Mr. Nugent, on a bag +of ballast in the bottom of the boat. + +"It's nigh on to fifteen year ago," said Silas, "that I was +on the bark Mary Auguster, bound for Sydney, New South Wales, +with a cargo of canned goods. We was somewhere about longitood a +hundred an' seventy, latitood nothin', an' it was the twenty- +second o' December, when we was ketched by a reg'lar typhoon +which blew straight along, end on, fur a day an' a half. It blew +away the storm-sails. It blew away every yard, spar, shroud, an' +every strand o' riggin', an' snapped the masts off close to the +deck. It blew away all the boats. It blew away the cook's +caboose, an' everythin' else on deck. It blew off the hatches, +an' sent 'em spinnin' in the air about a mile to leeward. An' +afore it got through, it washed away the cap'n an' all the crew +'cept me an' two others. These was Tom Simmons, the second mate, +an' Andy Boyle, a chap from the Adirondack Mount'ins, who'd never +been to sea afore. As he was a landsman, he ought, by rights, to +'a' been swep' off by the wind an' water, consid'rin' that the +cap'n an' sixteen good seamen had gone a'ready. But he had hands +eleven inches long, an' that give him a grip which no +typhoon could git the better of. Andy had let out that his +father was a miller up there in York State, an' a story had got +round among the crew that his granfather an' great-gran'father +was millers, too; an' the way the fam'ly got such big hands come +from their habit of scoopin' up a extry quart or two of meal or +flour fur themselves when they was levellin' off their customers' +measures. He was a good-natered feller, though, an' never got +riled when I'd tell him to clap his flour-scoops onter a halyard. +"We was all soaked, an' washed, an' beat, an' battered. We +held on some way or other till the wind blowed itself out, an' +then we got on our legs an' began to look about us to see how +things stood. The sea had washed into the open hatches till the +vessel was more'n half full of water, an' that had sunk her, so +deep that she must 'a' looked like a canal-boat loaded with +gravel. We hadn't had a thing to eat or drink durin' that whole +blow, an' we was pretty ravenous. We found a keg of water which +was all right, and a box of biscuit which was what you might call +softtack, fur they was soaked through an' through with sea-water. + +We eat a lot of them so, fur we couldn't wait, an' the rest we +spread on the deck to dry, fur the sun was now shinin' hot enough +to bake bread. We couldn't go below much, fur there was a pretty +good swell on the sea, an' things was floatin' about so's to make +it dangerous. But we fished out a piece of canvas, which we +rigged up ag'in' the stump of the mainmast so that we could have +somethin' that we could sit down an' grumble under. What struck +us all the hardest was that the bark was loaded with a whole +cargo of jolly things to eat, which was just as good as ever they +was, fur the water couldn't git through the tin cans in which +they was all put up, an' here we was with nothin' to live on but +them salted biscuit. There wasn't no way of gittin' at any of +the ship's stores, or any of the fancy prog, fur everythin' was +stowed away tight under six or seven feet of water, an' pretty +nigh all the room that was left between decks was filled up with +extry spars, lumber, boxes, an' other floatin' stuff. All was +shiftin', an' bumpin', an' bangin' every time the vessel rolled. + +"As I said afore, Tom was second mate, an' I was bo's'n. +Says I to Tom, `The thing we've got to do is to put up some kind +of a spar with a rag on it fur a distress flag, so that we'll +lose no time bein' took off.' `There's no use a-slavin' at +anythin' like that,' says Tom, `fur we've been blowed off the +track of traders, an' the more we work the hungrier we'll git, +an' the sooner will them biscuit be gone.' + +"Now when I heared Tom say this I sot still an' began to +consider. Bein' second mate, Tom was, by rights, in command of +this craft. But it was easy enough to see that if he commanded +there'd never be nothin' fur Andy an' me to do. All the grit he +had in him he'd used up in holdin' on durin' that typhoon. What +he wanted to do now was to make himself comfortable till the time +come for him to go to Davy Jones's locker--an' thinkin', most +likely, that Davy couldn't make it any hotter fur him than it was +on that deck, still in latitood nothin' at all, fur we'd been +blowed along the line pretty nigh due west. So I calls to Andy, +who was busy turnin' over the biscuits on the deck. `Andy,' says +I, when he had got under the canvas, `we's goin' to have a +'lection fur skipper. Tom, here, is about played out. He's one +candydate, an' I'm another. Now, who do you vote fur? An' mind +yer eye, youngster, that you don't make no mistake.' `I vote fur +you' says Andy. `Carried unanermous!' says I. `An' I want you +to take notice that I'm cap'n of what's left of the Mary +Auguster, an' you two has got to keep your minds on that, an' +obey orders.' If Davy Jones was to do all that Tom Simmons said +when he heared this, the old chap would be kept busier than he +ever was yit. But I let him growl his growl out, knowin' he'd +come round all right, fur there wasn't no help fur it, +consid'rin' Andy an' me was two to his one. Pretty soon we all +went to work, an' got up a spar from below, which we rigged to +the stump of the foremast, with Andy's shirt atop of it. + +"Them sea-soaked, sun-dried biscuit was pretty mean prog, as +you might think, but we eat so many of 'em that afternoon, an' +'cordingly drank so much water, that I was obliged to put us all +on short rations the next day. `This is the day afore +Christmas,' says Andy Boyle, `an' to-night will be Christmas eve, +an' it's pretty tough fur us to be sittin' here with not even so +much hardtack as we want, an' all the time thinkin' that the hold +of this ship is packed full of the gayest kind of good things to +eat.' `Shut up about Christmas!' says Tom Simmons. `Them two +youngsters of mine, up in Bangor, is havin' their toes and noses +pretty nigh froze, I 'spect, but they'll hang up their stockin's +all the same to-night, never thinkin' that their dad's bein' +cooked alive on a empty stomach.' `Of course they wouldn't hang +'em up,' says I, if they knowed what a fix you was in, but +they don't know it, an' what's the use of grumblin' at 'em fur +bein' a little jolly?' `Well,' says Andy `they couldn't be more +jollier than I'd be if I could git at some of them fancy fixin's +down in the hold. I worked well on to a week at 'Frisco puttin' +in them boxes, an' the names of the things was on the outside of +most of 'em; an' I tell you what it is, mates, it made my mouth +water, even then, to read 'em, an' I wasn't hungry, nuther, +havin' plenty to eat three times a day. There was roast beef, +an' roast mutton, an' duck, an' chicken, an' soup, an' peas, an' +beans, an' termaters, an' plum-puddin',an' mince-pie--' `Shut up +with your mince-pie!' sung out Tom Simmons. `Isn't it enough to +have to gnaw on these salt chips, without hearin' about mince- +pie?' `An' more'n that' says Andy, `there was canned peaches, +an' pears, an' plums, an' cherries.' + +"Now these things did sound so cool an' good to me on that +br'ilin' deck that I couldn't stand it, an' I leans over to Andy, +an' I says: `Now look-a here; if you don't shut up talkin' about +them things what's stowed below, an' what we can't git at nohow, +overboard you go!' `That would make you short-handed,' says +Andy, with a grin. `Which is more'n you could say,' says I, `if +you'd chuck Tom an, me over'--alludin' to his eleven-inch grip. +Andy didn't say no more then, but after a while he comes to me, +as I was lookin' round to see if anything was in sight, an' says +he, `I spose you ain't got nothin' to say ag'in' my divin' into +the hold just aft of the foremast, where there seems to be a bit +of pretty clear water, an' see if I can't git up somethin'?' +`You kin do it, if you like,' says I, `but it's at your own risk. + +You can't take out no insurance at this office.' `All +right, then,' says Andy; `an' if I git stove in by floatin' +boxes, you an' Tom'll have to eat the rest of them salt +crackers.' `Now, boy,' says I,--an' he wasn't much more, bein' +only nineteen year old,--`you'd better keep out o' that hold. +You'll just git yourself smashed. An' as to movin' any of them +there heavy boxes, which must be swelled up as tight as if they +was part of the ship, you might as well try to pull out one of +the Mary Auguster's ribs.' `I'll try it,' says Andy, `fur +to-morrer is Christmas, an' if I kin help it I ain't goin' to be +floatin' atop of a Christmas dinner without eatin' any on it.' I +let him go, fur he was a good swimmer an' diver, an' I did hope +he might root out somethin' or other, fur Christmas is about the +worst day in the year fur men to be starvin' on, an' that's what +we was a-comin' to. + +"Well, fur about two hours Andy swum, an' dove, an' come up +blubberin', an' dodged all sorts of floatin' an' pitchin' stuff, +fur the swell was still on. But he couldn't even be so much as +sartin that he'd found the canned vittles. To dive down through +hatchways, an' among broken bulkheads, to hunt fur any partiklar +kind o' boxes under seven foot of sea-water, ain't no easy job. +An' though Andy said he got hold of the end of a box that felt to +him like the big uns he'd noticed as havin' the meat-pies in, he +couldn't move it no more'n if it had been the stump of the +foremast. If we could have pumped the water out of the hold we +could have got at any part of the cargo we wanted, but as it was, +we couldn't even reach the ship's stores, which, of course, must +have been mostly sp'iled anyway, whereas the canned vittles was +just as good as new. The pumps was all smashed or stopped +up, for we tried 'em, but if they hadn't 'a' been we three +couldn't never have pumped out that ship on three biscuit a day, +an' only about two days' rations at that. + +"So Andy he come up, so fagged out that it was as much as he +could do to get his clothes on, though they wasn't much, an' then +he stretched himself out under the canvas an' went to sleep, an' +it wasn't long afore he was talkin' about roast turkey an' +cranberry sass, an' punkin-pie, an' sech stuff, most of which we +knowed was under our feet that present minnit. Tom Simmons he +just b'iled over, an' sung out: `Roll him out in the sun an' let +him cook! I can't stand no more of this!' But I wasn't goin' to +have Andy treated no sech way as that, fur if it hadn't been fur +Tom Simmons' wife an' young uns, Andy'd been worth two of him to +anybody who was consid'rin' savin' life. But I give the boy a +good punch in the ribs to stop his dreamin', fur I was as hungry +as Tom was, an' couldn't stand no nonsense about Christmas +dinners. + +"It was a little arter noon when Andy woke up, an' he went +outside to stretch himself. In about a minute he give a yell +that made Tom an' me jump. `A sail!' he hollered. `A sail!' An' +you may bet your life, young man, that 'twasn't more'n half a +second afore us two had scuffled out from under that canvas, an' +was standin' by Andy. `There she is!' he shouted, `not a mile to +win'ard.' I give one look, an' then I sings out: `'Tain't a +sail! It's a flag of distress! Can't you see, you land-lubber, +that that's the Stars and Stripes upside down?' `Why, so it is,' +says Andy, with a couple of reefs in the joyfulness of his +voice. An' Tom he began to growl as if somebody had cheated +him out of half a year's wages. + +"The flag that we saw was on the hull of a steamer that had +been driftin' down on us while we was sittin' under our canvas. +It was plain to see she'd been caught in the typhoon, too, fur +there wasn't a mast or a smoke-stack on her. But her hull was +high enough out of the water to catch what wind there was, while +we was so low sunk that we didn't make no way at all. There was +people aboard, and they saw us, an' waved their hats an' arms, +an' Andy an' me waved ours; but all we could do was to wait till +they drifted nearer, fur we hadn't no boats to go to 'em if we'd +wanted to. + +"`I'd like to know what good that old hulk is to us,' says +Tom Simmons. `She can't take us off.' It did look to me +somethin' like the blind leadin' the blind. But Andy he sings +out: `We'd be better off aboard of her, fur she ain't water- +logged, an', more'n that, I don't s'pose her stores are all +soaked up in salt water.' There was some sense in that, an' when +the steamer had got to within half a mile of us, we was glad to +see a boat put out from her with three men in it. It was a queer +boat, very low an' flat, an' not like any ship's boat I ever see. + +But the two fellers at the oars pulled stiddy, an' pretty soon +the boat was 'longside of us, an' the three men on our deck. One +of 'em was the first mate of the other wreck, an' when he found +out what was the matter with us, he spun his yarn, which was a +longer one than ours. His vessel was the Water Crescent, +nine hundred tons, from 'Frisco to Melbourne, an' they had sailed +about six weeks afore we did. They was about two weeks out +when some of their machinery broke down, an' when they got it +patched up it broke ag'in, worse than afore, so that they +couldn't do nothin' with it. They kep' along under sail for +about a month, makin' mighty poor headway till the typhoon struck +'em, an' that cleaned their decks off about as slick as it did +ours, but their hatches wasn't blowed off, an' they didn't ship +no water wuth mentionin', an' the crew havin' kep' below, none of +'em was lost. But now they was clean out of provisions an' +water, havin' been short when the breakdown happened, fur they +had sold all the stores they could spare to a French brig in +distress that they overhauled when about a week out. When they +sighted us they felt pretty sure they'd git some provisions out +of us. But when I told the mate what a fix we was in his jaw +dropped till his face was as long as one of Andy's hands. +Howsomdever, he said he'd send the boat back fur as many men as +it could bring over, an' see if they couldn't git up some of our +stores. Even if they was soaked with salt water, they'd be +better than nothin'. Part of the cargo of the Water Crescent +was tools an, things fur some railway contractors out in +Australier, an' the mate told the men to bring over some of them +irons that might be used to fish out the stores. All their +ship's boats had been blowed away, an' the one they had was a +kind of shore boat for fresh water, that had been shipped as part +of the cargo, an' stowed below. It couldn't stand no kind of a +sea, but there wasn't nothin' but a swell on, an' when it come +back it had the cap'n in it, an' five men, besides a lot of +chains an' tools. + +"Them fellers an' us worked pretty nigh the rest of the +day, an' we got out a couple of bar'ls of water, which was all +right, havin' been tight bunged, an' a lot of sea-biscuit, all +soaked an sloppy, but we only got a half-bar'l of meat, though +three or four of the men stripped an' dove fur more'n an hour. +We cut up some of the meat an' eat it raw, an' the cap'n sent +some over to the other wreck, which had drifted past us to +leeward, an' would have gone clean away from us if the cap'n +hadn't had a line got out an' made us fast to it while we was a- +workin' at the stores. + +"That night the cap'n took us three, as well as the +provisions we'd got out, on board his hull, where the +'commodations was consid'able better than they was on the half- +sunk Mary Auguster. An' afore we turned in he took me aft +an' had a talk with me as commandin' off'cer of my vessel. `That +wreck o' yourn,' says he, `has got a vallyble cargo in it, which +isn't sp'iled by bein' under water. Now, if you could get that +cargo into port it would put a lot of money in your pocket, fur +the owners couldn't git out of payin' you fur takin' charge of it +an' havin' it brung in. Now I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll +lie by you, an' I've got carpenters aboard that'll put your pumps +in order, an' I'll set my men to work to pump out your vessel. +An' then, when she's afloat all right, I'll go to work ag'in at +my vessel--which I didn't s'pose there was any use o' doin', but +whilst I was huntin' round amongst our cargo to-day I found that +some of the machinery we carried might be worked up so's to take +the place of what is broke in our engine. We've got a forge +aboard, an' I believe we can make these pieces of machinery fit, +an' git goin' ag'in. Then I'll tow you into Sydney, an' we'll +divide the salvage money. I won't git nothin' fur savin' my +vessel, coz that's my business, but you wasn't cap'n o' yourn, +an' took charge of her a-purpose to save her, which is another +thing.' + +"I wasn't at all sure that I didn't take charge of the +Mary Auguster to save myself an' not the vessel, but I didn't +mention that, an' asked the cap'n how he expected to live all +this time. + +"`Oh, we kin git at your stores easy enough,' says he, when +the water's pumped out.' `They'll be mostly sp'iled,' says I. +`That don't matter' says he. `Men'll eat anything when they +can't git nothin' else.' An' with that he left me to think it +over. + +"I must say, young man, an' you kin b'lieve me if you know +anything about sech things, that the idee of a pile of money was +mighty temptin' to a feller like me, who had a girl at home ready +to marry him, and who would like nothin' better'n to have a +little house of his own, an' a little vessel of his own, an' give +up the other side of the world altogether. But while I was goin' +over all this in my mind, an' wonderin' if the cap'n ever could +git us into port, along comes Andy Boyle, an' sits down beside +me. `It drives me pretty nigh crazy,' says he, `to think that +to-morrer's Christmas, an' we've got to feed on that sloppy stuff +we fished out of our stores, an' not much of it, nuther, while +there's all that roast turkey an' plum-puddin' an' mince-pie a- +floatin' out there just afore our eyes, an' we can't have none of +it.' `You hadn't oughter think so much about eatin', Andy,' says +I,`but if I was talkin' about them things I wouldn't leave out +canned peaches. By George! On a hot Christmas like this is +goin' to be, I'd be the jolliest Jack on the ocean if I could git +at that canned fruit.' `Well, there's a way,' says Andy, +`that we might git some of 'em. A part of the cargo of this ship +is stuff far blastin' rocks--ca'tridges, 'lectric bat'ries, an' +that sort of thing; an' there's a man aboard who's goin' out to +take charge of 'em. I've been talkin' to this bat'ry man, an' +I've made up my mind it'll be easy enough to lower a little +ca'tridge down among our cargo an' blow out a part of it.' `What +'u'd be the good of it,' says I, `blowed into chips?' `It might +smash some,' says he, `but others would be only loosened, an' +they'd float up to the top, where we could git 'em, specially +them as was packed with pies, which must be pretty light.' `Git +out, Andy,' says I, `with all that stuff!' An' he got out. + +"But the idees he'd put into my head didn't git out, an' as I +laid on my back on the deck, lookin' up at the stars, they +sometimes seemed to put themselves into the shape of a little +house, with a little woman cookin' at the kitchin fire, an' a +little schooner layin' at anchor just off shore. An' then ag'in +they'd hump themselves up till they looked like a lot of new tin +cans with their tops off, an' all kinds of good things to eat +inside, specially canned peaches--the big white kind, soft an' +cool, each one split in half, with a holler in the middle filled +with juice. By George, sir! the very thought of a tin can like +that made me beat my heels ag'in the deck. I'd been mighty +hungry, an' had eat a lot of salt pork, wet an' raw, an' now the +very idee of it, even cooked, turned my stomach. I looked up to +the stars ag'in, an' the little house an' the little schooner was +clean gone, an' the whole sky was filled with nothin' but bright +new tin cans. + +"In the mornin' Andy he come to me ag'in. `Have you made up +your mind,' says he, `about gittin' some of them good things +fur Christmas dinner?' `Confound you!' says I, `you talk as if +all we had to do was to go an' git 'em.' `An' that's what I +b'lieve we kin do,' says he, `with the help of that bat'ry man.' +`Yes,' says I, `an' blow a lot of the cargo into flinders, an' +damage the Mary Auguster so's she couldn't never be took into +port.' An' then I told him what the cap'n had said to me, an' +what I was goin' to do with the money. `A little ca'tridge,' +says Andy, `would do all we want, an' wouldn't hurt the vessel, +nuther. Besides that, I don't b'lieve what this cap'n says about +tinkerin' up his engine. 'Tain't likely he'll ever git her +runnin' ag'in, nor pump out the Mary Auguster, nuther. If I +was you I'd a durned sight ruther have a Christmas dinner in hand +than a house an' wife in the bush.' `I ain't thinkin' o' +marryin' a girl in Australier,' says I. An' Andy he grinned, an' +said I wouldn't marry nobody if I had to live on sp'iled vittles +till I got her. + +"A little arter that I went to the cap'n an' I told him about +Andy's idee, but he was down on it. `It's your vessel, an' not +mine,' says he, `an' if you want to try to git a dinner out of +her I'll not stand in your way. But it's my 'pinion you'll just +damage the ship, an' do nothin'.' Howsomdever, I talked to the +bat'ry man about it, an' he thought it could be done, an' not +hurt the ship, nuther. The men was all in favor of it, fur none +of 'em had forgot it was Christmas day. But Tom Simmons he was +ag'in' it strong, fur he was thinkin' he'd git some of the money +if we got the Mary Auguster into port. He was a selfish- +minded man, was Tom, but it was his nater, an' I s'pose he +couldn't help it. + +"Well, it wasn't long afore I began to feel pretty empty an' +mean, an' if I'd wanted any of the prog we got out the day afore, +I couldn't have found much, fur the men had eat it up nearly all +in the night. An' so I just made up my mind without any more +foolin', an' me an' Andy Boyle an' the bat'ry man, with some +ca'tridges an' a coil of wire, got into the little shore boat, +an' pulled over to the Mary Auguster. There we lowered a +small ca'tridge down the main hatchway, an' let it rest down +among the cargo. Then we rowed back to the steamer, uncoilin' +the wire as. we went. The bat'ry man clumb up on deck, an' fixed +his wire to a 'lectric machine, which he'd got all ready afore we +started. Andy an' me didn't git out of the boat. We had too +much sense fur that, with all them hungry fellers waitin' to jump +in her. But we just pushed a little off, an' sot waitin', with +our mouths awaterin', fur him to touch her off. He seemed to be +a long time about it, but at last he did it, an' that instant +there was a bang on board the Mary Auguster that made my +heart jump. Andy an' me pulled fur her like mad, the others a- +hollerin' arter us, an' we was on deck in no time. The deck was +all covered with the water that had been throwed up. But I tell +you, sir, that we poked an' fished about, an' Andy stripped an' +went down an' swum all round, an' we couldn't find one floatin' +box of canned goods. There was a lot of splinters, but where +they come from we didn't know. By this time my dander was up, +an' I just pitched around savage. That little ca'tridge wasn't +no good, an' I didn't intend to stand any more foolin'. We just +rowed back to the other wreck, an' I called to the ba'try man to +come down, an' bring some bigger ca'tridges with him, fur if +we was goin' to do anything we might as well do it right. So he +got down with a package of bigger ones, an' jumped into the boat. + +The cap'n he called out to us to be keerful, an' Tom Simmons +leaned over the rail an' swored; but I didn't pay no 'tention to +nuther of 'em, an' we pulled away. + +"When I got aboard the Mary Auguster, I says to the +bat'ry man: `We don't want no nonsense this time, an' I want you +to put in enough ca'tridges to heave up somethin' that'll do fur +a Christmas dinner. I don't know how the cargo is stored, but +you kin put one big ca'tridge 'midship, another for'ard, an' +another aft, an' one or nuther of 'em oughter fetch up +somethin'.' Well, we got the three ca'tridges into place. They +was a good deal bigger than the one we fust used, an' we j'ined +'em all to one wire, an' then we rowed back, carryin' the long +wire with us. When we reached the steamer, me an' Andy was a- +goin' to stay in the boat as we did afore, but the cap'n sung out +that he wouldn't allow the bat'ry to be touched off till we come +aboard. `Ther's got to be fair play,' says he. `It's your +vittles, but it's my side that's doin' the work. After we've +blasted her this time you two can go in the boat an' see what +there is to git hold of, but two of my men must go along.' So me +an' Andy had to go on deck, an' two big fellers was detailed to +go with us in the little boat when the time come, an' then the +bat'ry man he teched her off. + +"Well, sir, the pop that followed that tech was somethin' to +remember. It shuck the water, it shuck the air, an' it shuck the +hull we was on. A reg'lar cloud of smoke an' flyin' bits of +things rose up out of the Mary Auguster; an' when that smoke +cleared away, an' the water was all b'ilin' with the splash +of various-sized hunks that come rainin' down from the sky, what +was left of the Mary Auguster was sprinkled over the sea like +a wooden carpet fur water-birds to walk on. + +"Some of the men sung out one thing, an' some another, an' I +could hear Tom Simmons swear; but Andy an' me said never a word, +but scuttled down into the boat, follered close by the two men +who was to go with us. Then we rowed like devils fur the lot of +stuff that was bobbin' about on the water, out where the Mary +Auguster had been. In we went among the floatin' spars and +ship's timbers, I keepin' the things off with an oar, the two men +rowin', an' Andy in the bow. + +"Suddenly Andy give a yell, an' then he reached himself +for'ard with sech a bounce that I thought he'd go overboard. But +up he come in a minnit, his two 'leven-inch hands gripped round a +box. He sot down in the bottom of the boat with the box on his +lap an' his eyes screwed on some letters that was stamped on one +end. `Pidjin-pies!' he sings out. "Tain't turkeys, nor 'tain't +cranberries but, by the Lord Harry, it's Christmas pies all the +same!' After that Andy didn't do no more work, but sot holdin' +that box as if it had been his fust baby. But we kep' pushin' on +to see what else there was. It's my 'pinion that the biggest +part of that bark's cargo was blowed into mince-meat, an' the +most of the rest of it was so heavy that it sunk. But it wasn't +all busted up, an' it didn't all sink. There was a big piece of +wreck with a lot of boxes stove into the timbers, and some of +these had in 'em beef ready b'iled an' packed into cans, an' +there was other kinds of meat, an' dif'rent sorts of +vegetables, an' one box of turtle soup. I looked at every one of +'em as we took 'em in, an' when we got the little boat pretty +well loaded I wanted to still keep on searchin'; but the men they +said that shore boat 'u'd sink if we took in any more cargo, an' +so we put back, I feelin' glummer'n I oughter felt, fur I had +begun to be afeared that canned fruit, sech as peaches, was +heavy, an' li'ble to sink. + +"As soon as we had got our boxes aboard, four fresh men put +out in the boat, an' after a while they come back with another +load. An' I was mighty keerful to read the names on all the +boxes. Some was meat-pies, an' some was salmon, an' some was +potted herrin's, an' some was lobsters. But nary a thing could I +see that ever had growed on a tree. + +"Well, sir, there was three loads brought in altogether, an' +the Christmas dinner we had on the for'ard deck of that steamer's +hull was about the jolliest one that was ever seen of a hot day +aboard of a wreck in the Pacific Ocean. The cap'n kept good +order, an' when all was ready the tops was jerked off the boxes, +and each man grabbed a can an' opened it with his knife. When he +had cleaned it out, he tuk another without doin' much questionin' +as to the bill of fare. Whether anybody got pidjin-pie 'cept +Andy, I can't say, but the way we piled in Delmoniker prog would +'a' made people open their eyes as was eatin' their Christmas +dinners on shore that day. Some of the things would 'a' been +better cooked a little more, or het up, but we was too fearful +hungry to wait fur that, an' they was tiptop as they was. + +"The cap'n went out afterwards, an' towed in a couple of +bar'ls of flour that was only part soaked through, an' he got +some other plain prog that would do fur future use. But none of +us give our minds to stuff like this arter the glorious Christmas +dinner that we'd quarried out of the Mary Auguster. Every +man that wasn't on duty went below and turned in fur a snooze-- +all 'cept me, an' I didn't feel just altogether satisfied. To be +sure, I'd had an A1 dinner, an', though a little mixed, I'd never +eat a jollier one on any Christmas that I kin look back at. But, +fur all that, there was a hanker inside o' me. I hadn't got all +I'd laid out to git when we teched off the Mary Auguster. +The day was blazin' hot, an' a lot of the things I'd eat was +pretty peppery. `Now,' thinks I, `if there had been just one can +o' peaches sech as I seen shinin' in the stars last night!' An' +just then, as I was walkin' aft, all by myself, I seed lodged on +the stump of the mizzenmast a box with one corner druv down among +the splinters. It was half split open, an' I could see the tin +cans shinin' through the crack. I give one jump at it, an' +wrenched the side off. On the top of the first can I seed was a +picture of a big white peach with green leaves. That box had +been blowed up so high that if it had come down anywhere 'cept +among them splinters it would 'a' smashed itself to flinders, or +killed somebody. So fur as I know, it was the only thing that +fell nigh us, an' by George, sir, I got it! When I had finished +a can of 'em I hunted up Andy, an' then we went aft an' eat some +more. `Well,' says Andy, as we was a-eatin', `how d'ye feel now +about blowin' up your wife, an' your house, an' that little +schooner you was goin' to own?' + +"`Andy,' says I, `this is the joyfulest Christmas I've +had yit, an' if I was to live till twenty hundred I don't b'lieve +I'd have no joyfuler, with things comin' in so pat; so don't you +throw no shadders.' + +"`Shadders!' says Andy. `That ain't me. I leave that sort +of thing fur Tom Simmons.' + +"`Shadders is cool,' says I, `an' I kin go to sleep under all +he throws.' + +"Well, sir," continued old Silas, putting his hand on the +tiller and turning his face seaward, "if Tom Simmons had kept +command of that wreck, we all would 'a' laid there an' waited an' +waited till some of us was starved, an' the others got nothin' +fur it, fur the cap'n never mended his engine, an' it wasn't +more'n a week afore we was took off, an' then it was by a sailin' +vessel, which left the hull of the Water Crescent behind her, +just as she would 'a' had to leave the Mary Auguster if that +jolly old Christmas wreck had been there. + +"An' now, sir," said Silas, "d'ye see that stretch o' little +ripples over yander, lookin' as if it was a lot o' herrin' +turnin' over to dry their sides? Do you know what that is? +That's the supper wind. That means coffee, an' hot cakes, an' a +bit of br'iled fish, an' pertaters, an' p'r'aps, if the old woman +feels in a partiklar good humor, some canned peaches--big white +uns, cut in half, with a holler place in the middle filled with +cool, sweet juice." + + + + + MY WELL AND WHAT CAME + OUT OF IT + +Early in my married life I bought a small country estate which my +wife and I looked upon as a paradise. After enjoying its delight +for a little more than a year our souls were saddened by the +discovery that our Eden contained a serpent. This was an +insufficient water-supply. + +It had been a rainy season when we first went there, and for +a long time our cisterns gave us full aqueous satisfaction, but +early this year a drought had set in, and we were obliged to be +exceedingly careful of our water. + +It was quite natural that the scarcity of water for domestic +purposes should affect my wife much more than it did me, and +perceiving the discontent which was growing in her mind, I +determined to dig a well. The very next day I began to look for +a well-digger. Such an individual was not easy to find, for in +the region in which I lived wells had become unfashionable; but I +determined to persevere in my search, and in about a week I found +a well-digger. + +He was a man of somewhat rough exterior, but of an +ingratiating turn of mind. It was easy to see that it was his +earnest desire to serve me. + +"And now, then," said he, when we had had a little +conversation about terms, "the first thing to do is to find out +where there is water. Have you a peach-tree on the place?" We +walked to such a tree, and he cut therefrom a forked twig. + +"I thought," said I, "that divining-rods were always of hazel +wood." + +"A peach twig will do quite as well," said he, and I have +since found that he was right. Divining-rods of peach will turn +and find water quite as well as those of hazel or any other kind +of wood. + +He took an end of the twig in each hand, and, with the point +projecting in front of him, he slowly walked along over the grass +in my little orchard. Presently the point of the twig seemed to +bend itself downward toward the ground. + +"There," said he, stopping, "you will find water here." + +"I do not want a well here," said I. "This is at the bottom +of a hill, and my barn-yard is at the top. Besides, it is too +far from the house." + +"Very good," said he. "We will try somewhere else." + +His rod turned at several other places, but I had objections +to all of them. A sanitary engineer had once visited me, and he +had given me a great deal of advice about drainage, and I knew +what to avoid. + +We crossed the ridge of the hill into the low ground on the +other side. Here were no buildings, nothing which would +interfere with the purity of a well. My well-digger walked +slowly over the ground with his divining-rod. Very soon he +exclaimed: "Here is water!" And picking up a stick, he +sharpened one end of it and drove it into the ground. Then +he took a string from his pocket, and making a loop in one end, +he put it over the stick. + +"What are you going to do?" I asked. + +"I am going to make a circle four feet in diameter," he said. +"We have to dig the well as wide as that, you know." + +"But I do not want a well here," said I. "It's too close to +the wall. I could not build a house over it. It would not do at +all." + +He stood up and looked at me. "Well, sir," said he, "will +you tell me where you would like to have a well?" + +"Yes," said I. "I would like to have it over there in the +corner of the hedge. It would be near enough to the house; it +would have a warm exposure, which will be desirable in winter; +and the little house which I intend to build over it would look +better there than anywhere else." + +He took his divining-rod and went to the spot I had +indicated. "Is this the place?" he asked wishing to be sure he +had understood me. + +"Yes," I replied. + +He put his twig in position, and in a few seconds it turned +in the direction of the ground. Then he drove down a stick, +marked out a circle, and the next day he came with two men and a +derrick, and began to dig my well. + +When they had gone down twenty-five feet they found water, +and when they had progressed a few feet deeper they began to be +afraid of drowning. I thought they ought to go deeper, but the +well-digger said that they could not dig without first taking +out the water, and that the water came in as fast as they +bailed it out, and he asked me to put it to myself and tell him +how they could dig it deeper. I put the question to myself, but +could find no answer. I also laid the matter before some +specialists, and it was generally agreed that if water came in as +fast as it was taken out, nothing more could be desired. The +well was, therefore, pronounced deep enough. It was lined with +great tiles, nearly a yard in diameter, and my well-digger, after +congratulating me on finding water so easily, bade me good-by and +departed with his men and his derrick. + +On the other side of the wall which bounded my grounds, and +near which my well had been dug, there ran a country lane, +leading nowhere in particular, which seemed to be there for the +purpose of allowing people to pass my house, who might otherwise +be obliged to stop. + +Along this lane my neighbors would pass, and often strangers +drove by, and as my well could easily be seen over the low stone +wall, its construction had excited a great deal of interest. +Some of the people who drove by were summer folks from the city, +and I am sure, from remarks I overheard, that it was thought a +very queer thing to dig for water. Of course they must have +known that people used to do this in the olden times, even as far +back as the time of Jacob and Rebecca, but the expressions of +some of their faces indicated that they remembered that this was +the nineteenth century. + +My neighbors, however, were all rural people, and much more +intelligent in regard to water-supplies. One of them, Phineas +Colwell by name, took a more lively interest in my +operations than did any one else. He was a man of about fifty +years of age, who had been a soldier. This fact was kept alive +in the minds of his associates by his dress, a part of which was +always military. If he did not wear an old fatigue-jacket with +brass buttons, he wore his blue trousers, or, perhaps, a +waistcoat that belonged to his uniform, and if he wore none of +these, his military hat would appear upon his head. I think he +must also have been a sailor, judging from the little gold rings +in his ears. But when I first knew him he was a carpenter, who +did mason-work whenever any of the neighbors had any jobs of the +sort. He also worked in gardens by the day, and had told me that +he understood the care of horses and was a very good driver. He +sometimes worked on farms, especially at harvest-time, and I know +he could paint, for he once showed me a fence which he said he +had painted. I frequently saw him, because he always seemed to +be either going to his work or coming from it. In fact, he +appeared to consider actual labor in the light of a bad habit +which he wished to conceal, and which he was continually +endeavoring to reform. + +Phineas walked along our lane at least once a day, and +whenever he saw me he told me something about the well. He did +not approve of the place I had selected for it. If he had been +digging a well he would have put it in a very different place. +When I had talked with him for some time and explained why I had +chosen this spot, he would say that perhaps I was right, and +begin to talk of something else. But the next time I saw him he +would again assert that if he had been digging that well he would +not have put it there. + +About a quarter of a mile from my house, at a turn of the +lane, lived Mrs. Betty Perch. She was a widow with about twelve +children. A few of these were her own, and the others she had +inherited from two sisters who had married and died, and whose +husbands, having proved their disloyalty by marrying again, were +not allowed by the indignant Mrs. Perch to resume possession of +their offspring. The casual observer might have supposed the +number of these children to be very great,--fifteen or perhaps +even twenty,--for if he happened to see a group of them on the +door-step, he would see a lot more if he looked into the little +garden; and under some cedar-trees at the back of the house there +were always some of them on fine days. But perhaps they sought +to increase their apparent number, and ran from one place to +another to be ready to meet observation, like the famous clown +Grimaldi, who used to go through his performances at one London +theatre, and then dash off in his paint and motley to another, so +that perambulating theatre-going men might imagine that there +were two greatest clowns in the world. + +When Mrs. Perch had time she sewed for the neighbors, and, +whether she had time or not, she was always ready to supply them +with news. From the moment she heard I was going to dig a well +she took a vital interest in it. Her own water-supply was +unsatisfactory, as she depended upon a little spring which +sometimes dried up in summer, and should my well turn out to be a +good one, she knew I would not object to her sending the children +for pails of water on occasions. + +"It will be fun for them," she said, "and if your water +really is good it will often come in very well for me. Mr. +Colwell tells me," she continued, "that you put your well in the +wrong place. He is a practical man and knows all about wells, +and I do hope that for your sake he may be wrong." + +My neighbors were generally pessimists. Country people are +proverbially prudent, and pessimism is prudence. We feel safe +when we doubt the success of another, because if he should +succeed we can say we were glad we were mistaken, and so step +from a position of good judgment to one of generous disposition +without feeling that we have changed our plane of merit. But the +optimist often gets himself into terrible scrapes, for if he is +wrong he cannot say he is glad of it. + +But, whatever else he may be, a pessimist is depressing, and +it was, therefore, a great pleasure to me to have a friend who +was an out-and-out optimist. In fact, he might be called a +working optimist. He lived about six miles from my house, and +had a hobby, which was natural phenomena. He was always on the +lookout for that sort of thing, and when he found it he would +study its nature and effect. He was a man in the maturity of +youth, and if the estate on which he lived had not belonged to +his mother, he would have spent much time and money in +investigating its natural phenomena. He often drove over to see +me, and always told me how glad he would be if he had an +opportunity of digging a well. + +"I have the wildest desire," he said, "to know what is in the +earth under our place, and if it should so happen in the course +of time that the limits of earthly existence should be reached +by--I mean if the estate should come into my hands--I would +go down, down, down, until I had found out all that could be +discovered. To own a plug of earth four thousand miles long and +only to know what is on the surface of the upper end of it is +unmanly. We might as well be grazing beasts." + +He was sorry that I was digging only for water, because water +is a very commonplace thing, but he was quite sure I would get +it, and when my well was finished he was one of the first to +congratulate me. + +"But if I had been in your place," said he, "with full right +to do as I pleased, I would not have let those men go away. I +would have set them to work in some place where there would be no +danger of getting water,--at least, for a long time,--and then +you would have found out what are the deeper treasures of your +land." + +Having finished my well, I now set about getting the water +into my residence near by. I built a house over the well and put +in it a little engine, and by means of a system of pipes, like +the arteries and veins of the human body, I proposed to +distribute the water to the various desirable points in my house. + +The engine was the heart, which should start the circulation, +which should keep it going, and which should send throbbing +through every pipe the water which, if it were not our life, was +very necessary to it. + +When all was ready we started the engine, and in a very short +time we discovered that something was wrong. For fifteen or +twenty minutes water flowed into the tank at the top of the +house, with a sound that was grander in the ears of my wife and +myself than the roar of Niagara, and then it stopped. +Investigation proved that the flow had stopped because there +was no more water in the well. + +It is needless to detail the examinations, investigations, +and the multitude of counsels and opinions with which our minds +were filled for the next few days. It was plain to see that +although this well was fully able to meet the demands of a hand- +pump or of bailing buckets, the water did not flow into it as +fast as it could be pumped out by an engine. Therefore, for the +purposes of supplying the circulation of my domestic water +system, the well was declared a failure. + +My non-success was much talked about in the neighborhood, and +we received a great deal of sympathy and condolence. Phineas +Colwell was not surprised at the outcome of the affair. He had +said that the well had been put in the wrong place. Mrs. Betty +was not only surprised, but disgusted. + +"It is all very well for you," she said, "who could afford to +buy water if it was necessary, but it is very different with the +widow and the orphan. If I had not supposed you were going to +have a real well, I would have had my spring cleaned out and +deepened. I could have had it done in the early summer, but it +is of no use now. The spring has dried up." + +She told a neighbor that she believed the digging of my well +had dried up her spring, and that that was the way of this world, +where the widow and the orphan were sure to come out at the +little end. + +Of course I did not submit to defeat--at least, not without a +struggle. I had a well, and if anything could be done to make +that well supply me with water, I was going to do it. I +consulted specialists, and, after careful consideration of the +matter, they agreed that it would be unadvisable for me to +attempt to deepen my present well, as there was reason to suppose +there was very little water in the place where I had dug it, and +that the very best thing I could do would be to try a driven +well. As I had already excavated about thirty feet, that was so +much gain to me, and if I should have a six-inch pipe put into my +present well and then driven down and down until it came to a +place where there was plenty of water, I would have all I wanted. + +How far down the pipe would have to be driven, of course they did +not know, but they all agreed that if I drove deep enough I would +get all the water I wanted. This was the only kind of a well, +they said, which one could sink as deep as he pleased without +being interfered with by the water at the bottom. My wife and I +then considered the matter, and ultimately decided that it would +be a waste of the money which we had already spent upon the +engine, the pipes, and the little house, and, as there was +nothing else to be done but to drive a well, we would have a well +driven. + +Of course we were both very sorry that the work must be begun +again, but I was especially dissatisfied, for the weather was +getting cold, there was already snow upon the ground, and I was +told that work could not be carried on in winter weather. I lost +no time, however, in making a contract with a well-driver, who +assured me that as soon as the working season should open, which +probably would be very early in the spring, he would come to my +place and begin to drive my well. + +The season did open, and so did the pea-blossoms, and the +pods actually began to fill before I saw that well-driver +again. I had had a good deal of correspondence with him in the +meantime, urging him to prompt action, but he always had some +good reason for delay. (I found out afterwards that he was busy +fulfilling a contract made before mine, in which he promised to +drive a well as soon as the season should open.) + +At last--it was early in the summer--he came with his derricks, a +steam-engine, a trip-hammer, and a lot of men. They took off the +roof of my house, removed the engine, and set to work. + +For many a long day, and I am sorry to say for many a longer +night, that trip-hammer hammered and banged. On the next day +after the night-work began, one of my neighbors came to me to +know what they did that for. I told him they were anxious to get +through. + +"Get through what?" said he. "The earth? If they do that, +and your six-inch pipe comes out in a Chinaman's back yard, he +will sue you for damages." + +When the pipe had been driven through the soft stratum under +the old well, and began to reach firmer ground, the pounding and +shaking of the earth became worse and worse. My wife was obliged +to leave home with our child. + +"If he is to do without both water and sleep," said she, "he +cannot long survive." And I agreed with her. + +She departed for a pleasant summer resort where her married +sister with her child was staying, and from week to week I +received very pleasant letters from her, telling me of the charms +of the place, and dwelling particularly upon the abundance of +cool spring water with which the house was supplied. + +While this terrible pounding was going on I heard various +reports of its effect upon my neighbors. One of them, an +agriculturist, with whom I had always been on the best of terms, +came with a clouded brow. + +"When I first felt those shakes," he said, "I thought they +were the effects of seismic disturbances, and I did not mind, but +when I found it was your well I thought I ought to come over to +speak about it. I do not object to the shaking of my barn, +because my man tells me the continual jolting is thrashing out +the oats and wheat, but I do not like to have all my apples and +pears shaken off my trees. And then," said he, "I have a late +brood of chickens, and they cannot walk, because every time they +try to make a step they are jolted into the air about a foot. +And again, we have had to give up having soup. We like soup, but +we do not care to have it spout up like a fountain whenever that +hammer comes down." + +I was grieved to trouble this friend, and I asked him what I +should do. "Do you want me to stop the work on the well?" said I. + +"Oh, no," said he, heartily. "Go on with the work. You must +have water, and we will try to stand the bumping. I dare say it +is good for dyspepsia, and the cows are getting used to having +the grass jammed up against their noses. Go ahead; we can stand +it in the daytime, but if you could stop the night-work we would +be very glad. Some people may think it a well-spring of pleasure +to be bounced out of bed, but I don't." + +Mrs. Perch came to me with a face like a squeezed lemon, and +asked me if I could lend her five nails. + +"What sort? " said I. + +"The kind you nail clapboards on with," said she. "There is +one of them been shook entirely off my house by your well. I am +in hopes that before the rest are all shook off I shall get in +some money that is owing me and can afford to buy nails for +myself." + +I stopped the night-work, but this was all I could do for +these neighbors. + +My optimist friend was delighted when he heard of my driven +well. He lived so far away that he and his mother were not +disturbed by the jarring of the ground. Now he was sure that +some of the internal secrets of the earth would be laid bare, and +he rode or drove over every day to see what we were getting out +of the well. I know that he was afraid we would soon get water, +but was too kind-hearted to say so. + +One day the pipe refused to go deeper. No matter how hard it +was struck, it bounced up again. When some of the substance it +had struck was brought up it looked like French chalk, and my +optimist eagerly examined it. + +"A French-chalk mine," said he, "would not be a bad thing, +but I hoped that you had struck a bed of mineral gutta-percha. +That would be a grand find." + +But the chalk-bed was at last passed, and we began again to +bring up nothing but common earth. + +"I suppose," said my optimist to me, one morning, "that you +must soon come to water, and if you do I hope it will be hot +water." + +"Hot water!" I exclaimed. "I do not want that." + +"Oh, yes, you would, if you had thought about it as much as I +have," he replied. "I lay awake for hours last night, thinking +what would happen if you struck hot water. In the first place, +it would be absolutely pure, because, even if it were +possible for germs and bacilli to get down so deep, they would be +boiled before you got them, and then you could cool that water +for drinking. When fresh it would be already heated for cooking +and hot baths. And then--just think of it!--you could introduce +the hot-water system of heating into your house, and there would +be the hot water always ready. But the great thing would be your +garden. Think of the refuse hot water circulating in pipes up +and down and under all your beds! That garden would bloom in the +winter as others do in the summer; at least, you could begin to +have Lima-beans and tomatoes as soon as the frost was out of the +air." + +I laughed. "It would take a lot of pumping," I said, "to do +all that with the hot water." + +"Oh, I forgot to say," he cried, with sparkling eyes, "that I +do not believe you would ever have any more pumping to do. You +have now gone down so far that I am sure whatever you find will +force itself up. It will spout high into the air or through all +your pipes, and run always." + +Phineas Colwell was by when this was said, and he must have +gone down to Mrs. Betty Perch's house to talk it over with her, +for in the afternoon she came to see me. + +"I understand," said she, "that you are trying to get hot +water out of your well, and that there is likely to be a lot more +than you need, so that it will run down by the side of the road. +I just want to say that if a stream of hot water comes down past +my house some of the children will be bound to get into it and be +scalded to death, and I came to say that if that well is +going to squirt b'iling water I'd like to have notice so that I +can move, though where a widow with so many orphans is going to +move to nobody knows. Mr. Colwell says that if you had got him +to tell you where to put that well there would have been no +danger of this sort of thing." + +The next day the optimist came to me, his face fairly blazing +with a new idea. "I rode over on purpose to urge you," he cried, +"if you should strike hot water, not to stop there. Go on, and, +by George! you may strike fire." + +"Heavens!" I cried. + +"Oh, quite the opposite," said he. "But do not let us joke. +I think that would be the grandest thing of this age. Think of a +fire well, with the flames shooting up perhaps a hundred feet +into the air!" + +I wish Phineas Colwell had not been there. As it was, he +turned pale and sat down on the wall. + +"You look astonished!" exclaimed the optimist, "but listen to +me. You have not thought of this thing as I have. If you should +strike fire your fortune would be made. By a system of +reflectors you could light up the whole country. By means of +tiles and pipes this region could be made tropical. You could +warm all the houses in the neighborhood with hot air. And then +the power you could generate--just think of it! Heat is power; +the cost of power is the fuel. You could furnish power to all +who wanted it. You could fill this region with industries. My +dear sir, you must excuse my agitation, but if you should strike +fire there is no limit to the possibilities of achievement." + +"But I want water," said I. "Fire would not take the place +of that." + +"Oh, water is a trifle," said he. "You could have pipes laid +from town; it is only about two miles. But fire! Nobody has yet +gone down deep enough for that. You have your future in your +hands." + +As I did not care to connect my future with fire, this idea +did not strike me very forcibly, but it struck Phineas Colwell. +He did not say anything to me, but after I had gone he went to +the well-drivers. + +"If you feel them pipes getting hot," he said to them, "I +warn you to stop. I have been in countries where there are +volcanoes, and I know what they are. There's enough of them in +this world, and there's no need of making new ones." + +In the afternoon a wagoner, who happened to be passing, +brought me a note from Mrs. Perch, very badly spelled, asking if +I would let one of my men bring her a pail of water, for she +could not think of coming herself or letting any of the children +come near my place if spouting fires were expected. + +The well-driving had gone on and on, with intermissions on +account of sickness in the families of the various workmen, until +it had reached the limit which I had fixed, and we had not found +water in sufficient quantity, hot or cold, nor had we struck +fire, or anything else worth having. + +The well-drivers and some specialists were of the opinion +that if I were to go ten, twenty, or perhaps a hundred feet +deeper, I would be very likely to get all the water I wanted. +But, of course, they could not tell how deep they must go, for +some wells were over a thousand feet deep. I shook my head at +this. There seemed to be only one thing certain about this +drilling business, and that was the expense. I declined to go +any deeper. + +"I think," a facetious neighbor said to me, "it would be +cheaper for you to buy a lot of Apollinaris water,--at wholesale +rates, of course,--and let your men open so many bottles a day +and empty them into your tank. You would find that would pay +better in the long run." + +Phineas Colwell told me that when he had informed Mrs. Perch +that I was going to stop operations, she was in a dreadful state +of mind. After all she had undergone, she said, it was simply +cruel to think of my stopping before I got water, and that after +having dried up her spring! + +This is what Phineas said she said, but when next I met her +she told me that he had declared that if I had put the well where +he thought it ought to be, I should have been having all the +water I wanted before now. + +My optimist was dreadfully cast down when he heard that I +would drive no deeper. + +"I have been afraid of this," he said. "I have, been afraid +of it. And if circumstances had so arranged themselves that I +should have command of money, I should have been glad to assume +the expense of deeper explorations. I have been thinking a great +deal about the matter, and I feel quite sure that even if you did +not get water or anything else that might prove of value to you, +it would be a great advantage to have a pipe sunk into the earth +to the depth of, say, one thousand feet." + +"What possible advantage could that be?" I asked. + +"I will tell you," he said. "You would then have one of +the grandest opportunities ever offered to man of constructing a +gravity-engine. This would be an engine which would be of no +expense at all to run. It would need no fuel. Gravity would be +the power. It would work a pump splendidly. You could start it +when you liked and stop it when you liked." + +"Pump!" said I. "What is the good of a pump without water?" + +"Oh, of course you would have to have water," he answered. +"But, no matter how you get it, you will have to pump it up to +your tank so as to make it circulate over your house. Now, my +gravity-pump would do this beautifully. You see, the pump would +be arranged with cog-wheels and all that sort of thing, and the +power would be supplied by a weight, which would be a cylinder of +lead or iron, fastened to a rope and run down inside your pipe. +Just think of it! It would run down a thousand feet, and where +is there anything worked by weight that has such a fall as that?" + +I laughed. "That is all very well," said I. "But how about +the power required to wind that weight up again when it got to +the bottom? I should have to have an engine to do that." + +"Oh, no," said he. "I have planned the thing better than +that. You see, the greater the weight the greater the power and +the velocity. Now, if you take a solid cylinder of lead about +four inches in diameter, so that it would slip easily down your +pipe,--you might grease it, for that matter,--and twenty feet in +length, it would be an enormous weight, and in slowly descending +for about an hour a day--for that would be long enough for your +pumping--and going down a thousand feet, it would run your +engine for a year. Now, then, at the end of the year you could +not expect to haul that weight up again. You would have a +trigger arrangement which would detach it from the rope when it +got to the bottom. Then you would wind up your rope,--a man +could do that in a short time,--and you would attach another +cylinder of lead, and that would run your engine for another +year, minus a few days, because it would only go down nine +hundred and eighty feet. The next year you would put on another +cylinder, and so on. I have not worked out the figures exactly, +but I think that in this way your engine would run for thirty +years before the pipe became entirely filled with cylinders. +That would be probably as long as you would care to have water +forced into the house." + +"Yes"' said I, "I think that is likely." + +He saw that his scheme did not strike me favorably. Suddenly +a light flashed across his face. + +"I tell you what you can do with your pipe," he said, "just +as it is. You can set up a clock over it which would run for +forty years without winding." + +I smiled, and he turned sadly away to his horse; but he had +not ridden ten yards before he came back and called to me over +the wall. + +"If the earth at the bottom of your pipe should ever yield to +pressure and give way, and if water or gas, or--anything, should +be squirted out of it, I beg you will let me know as soon as +possible." + +I promised to do so. + +When the pounding was at an end my wife and child came home. +But the season continued dry, and even their presence could not +counteract the feeling of aridity which seemed to permeate +everything which belonged to us, material or immaterial. We had +a great deal of commiseration from our neighbors. I think even +Mrs. Betty Perch began to pity us a little, for her spring had +begun to trickle again in a small way, and she sent word to me +that if we were really in need of water she would be willing to +divide with us. Phineas Colwell was sorry for us, of course, but +he could not help feeling and saying that if I had consulted him +the misfortune would have been prevented. + +It was late in the summer when my wife returned, and when she +made her first visit of inspection to the grounds and gardens, +her eyes, of course, fell upon the unfinished well. She was +shocked. + +"I never saw such a scene of wreckage," she said. "It looks +like a Western town after a cyclone. I think the best thing you +can do is to have this dreadful litter cleared up, the ground +smoothed and raked, the wall mended, and the roof put back on +that little house, and then if we can make anybody believe it is +an ice-house, so much the better." + +This was good advice, and I sent for a man to put the +vicinity of the well in order and give it the air of neatness +which characterizes the rest of our home. + +The man who came was named Mr. Barnet. He was a +contemplative fellow with a pipe in his mouth. After having +worked at the place for half a day he sent for me and said: + +"I'll tell you what I would do if I was in your place. I'd +put that pump-house in order, and I'd set up the engine, and put +the pump down into that thirty-foot well you first dug, and I'd +pump water into my house." + +I looked at him in amazement. + +"There's lots of water in that well," he continued, "and if +there's that much now in this drought, you will surely have ever +so much more when the weather isn't so dry. I have measured the +water, and I know." + +I could not understand him. It seemed to me that he was talking +wildly. He filled his pipe and lighted it and sat upon the wall. + +"Now," said he, after he had taken a few puffs, "I'll tell +you where the trouble's been with your well. People are always +in too big a hurry in this world about all sorts of things as +well as wells. I am a well-digger and I know all about them. We +know if there is any water in the ground it will always find its +way to the deepest hole there is, and we dig a well so as to give +it a deep hole to go to in the place where we want it. But you +can't expect the water to come to that hole just the very day +it's finished. Of course you will get some, because it's right +there in the neighborhood, but there is always a lot more that +will come if you give it time. It's got to make little channels +and passages for itself, and of course it takes time to do that. +It's like settling up a new country. Only a few pioneers come at +first, and you have to wait for the population to flow in. This +being a dry season, and the water in the ground a little sluggish +on that account, it was a good while finding out where your well +was. If I had happened along when you was talking about a well, +I think I should have said to you that I knew a proverb which +would about fit your case, and that is: `Let well enough +alone.'" + +I felt like taking this good man by the hand, but I did not. I +only told him to go ahead and do everything that was proper. + +The next morning, as I was going to the well, I saw Phineas +Colwell coming down the lane and Mrs. Betty Perch coming up it. +I did not wish them to question me, so I stepped behind some +bushes. When they met they stopped. + +"Upon my word!" exclaimed Mrs. Betty, "if he isn't going to +work again on that everlasting well! If he's got so much money +he don't know what to do with it, I could tell him that there's +people in this world, and not far away either, who would be the +better for some of it. It's a sin and a shame and an +abomination. Do you believe, Mr. Colwell, that there is the +least chance in the world of his ever getting water enough out of +that well to shave himself with?" + +"Mrs. Perch," said Phineas, "it ain't no use talking about +that well. It ain't no use, and it never can be no use, because +it's in the wrong place. If he ever pumps water out of that well +into his house I'll do--" + +"What will you do?" asked Mr. Barnet, who just then appeared +from the recesses of the engine-house. + +"I'll do anything on this earth that you choose to name," +said Phineas. "I am safe, whatever it is." + +"Well, then," said Mr. Barnet, knocking the ashes from his +pipe preparatory to filling it again, "will you marry Mrs. +Perch?" + +Phineas laughed. "Yes," he said. "I promised I would do +anything, and I'll promise that." + +"A slim chance for me," said Mrs. Betty, "even if I'd have +you." And she marched on with her nose in the air. + +When Mr. Barnet got fairly to work with his derrick, his +men, and his buckets, he found that there was a good deal more to +do than he had expected. The well-drivers had injured the +original well by breaking some of the tiles which lined it, and +these had to be taken out and others put in, and in the course of +this work other improvements suggested themselves and were made. +Several times operations were delayed by sickness in the family +of Mr. Barnet, and also in the families of his workmen, but still +the work went on in a very fair manner, although much more slowly +than had been supposed by any one. But in the course of time--I +will not say how much time--the work was finished, the engine was +in its place, and it pumped water into my house, and every day +since then it has pumped all the water we need, pure, cold, and +delicious. + +Knowing the promise Phineas Colwell had made, and feeling +desirous of having everything which concerned my well settled and +finished, I went to look for him to remind him of his duty toward +Mrs. Perch, but I could not find that naval and military +mechanical agriculturist. He had gone away to take a job or a +contract,--I could not discover which,--and he has not since +appeared in our neighborhood. Mrs. Perch is very severe on me +about this. + +"There's plenty of bad things come out of that well," she +said, "but I never thought anything bad enough would come out of +it to make Mr. Colwell go away and leave me to keep on being a +widow with all them orphans." + + + + MR.TOLMAN + +Mr. Tolman was a gentleman whose apparent age was of a varying +character. At times, when deep in thought on business matters or +other affairs, one might have thought him fifty-five or fifty- +seven, or even sixty. Ordinarily, however, when things were +running along in a satisfactory and commonplace way, he appeared +to be about fifty years old, while upon some extraordinary +occasions, when the world assumed an unusually attractive aspect, +his age seemed to run down to forty-five or less. + +He was the head of a business firm. In fact, he was the only +member of it. The firm was known as Pusey and Co. But Pusey had +long been dead and the "Co.," of which Mr. Tolman had been a +member, was dissolved. Our elderly hero, having bought out the +business, firm-name and all, for many years had carried it on +with success and profit. His counting-house was a small and +quiet place, but a great deal of money had been made in it. Mr. +Tolman was rich--very rich indeed. + +And yet, as he sat in his counting-room one winter evening, +he looked his oldest. He had on his hat and his overcoat, his +gloves and his fur collar. Every one else in the establishment +had gone home, and he, with the keys in his hand, was ready +to lock up and leave also. He often stayed later than any one +else, and left the keys with Mr. Canterfield, the head clerk, as +he passed his house on his way home. + +Mr. Tolman seemed in no hurry to go. He simply sat and +thought, and increased his apparent age. The truth was, he did +not want to go home. He was tired of going home. This was not +because his home was not a pleasant one. No single gentleman in +the city had a handsomer or more comfortable suite of rooms. It +was not because he felt lonely, or regretted that a wife and +children did not brighten and enliven his home. He was perfectly +satisfied to be a bachelor. The conditions suited him exactly. +But, in spite of all this, he was tired of going home. + +"I wish," said Mr. Tolman to himself, "that I could feel some +interest in going home." Then he rose and took a turn or two up +and down the room. But as that did not seem to give him any more +interest in the matter, he sat down again. "I wish it were +necessary for me to go home," said he, "but it isn't." So then +he fell again to thinking. "What I need," he said, after a +while, "is to depend more upon myself--to feel that I am +necessary to myself. Just now I'm not. I'll stop going home--at +least, in this way. Where's the sense in envying other men, when +I can have all that they have just as well as not? And I'll have +it, too," said Mr. Tolman, as he went out and locked the doors. +Once in the streets, and walking rapidly, his ideas shaped +themselves easily and readily into a plan which, by the time he +reached the house of his head clerk, was quite matured. Mr. +Canterfield was just going down to dinner as his employer +rang the bell, so he opened the door himself. "I will +detain you but a minute or two," said Mr. Tolman, handing the +keys to Mr. Canterfield. "Shall we step into the parlor?" + +When his employer had gone, and Mr. Canterfield had joined +his family at the dinner-table, his wife immediately asked him +what Mr. Tolman wanted. + "Only to say that he is going away to-morrow, and that I am +to attend to the business, and send his personal letters to----," +naming a city not a hundred miles away. + +"How long is he going to stay?" + +"He didn't say," answered Mr. Canterfield. + +"I'll tell you what he ought to do," said the lady. "He +ought to make you a partner in the firm, and then he could go +away and stay as long as he pleased." + +"He can do that now," returned her husband. "He has made a +good many trips since I have been with him, and things have gone +on very much in the same way as when he is here. He knows that." + +"But still you'd like to be a partner?" + +"Oh, yes," said Mr. Canterfield. + +"And common gratitude ought to prompt him to make you one," +said his wife. + +Mr. Tolman went home and wrote a will. He left all his +property, with the exception of a few legacies, to the richest +and most powerful charitable organization in the country. + +"People will think I am crazy," said he to himself, "and if I +should die while I am carrying out my plan, I will leave the task +of defending my sanity to people who are able to make a good +fight for me." And before he went to bed his will was +signed and witnessed. + +The next day he packed a trunk and left for the neighboring +city. His apartments were to be kept in readiness for his return +at any time. If you had seen him walking over to the railroad +depot, you would have taken him for a man of forty-five. + +When he arrived at his destination, Mr. Tolman established +himself temporarily at a hotel, and spent the next three or four +days in walking about the city looking for what he wanted. What +he wanted was rather difficult to define, but the way in which he +put the matter to himself was something like this: + +"I would like to find a snug little place where, I can live, +and carry on some business which I can attend to myself, and +which will bring me into contact with people of all sorts--people +who will interest me. It must be a small business, because I +don't want to have to work very hard, and it must be snug and +comfortable, because I want to enjoy it. I would like a shop of +some sort, because that brings a man face to face with his +fellow-creatures." + +The city in which he was walking about was one of the best +places in the country in which to find the place of business he +desired. It was full of independent little shops. But Mr. +Tolman could not readily find one which resembled his ideal. A +small dry-goods establishment seemed to presuppose a female +proprietor. A grocery store would give him many interesting +customers; but he did not know much about groceries, and the +business did not appear to him to possess any aesthetic features. + +He was much pleased by a small shop belonging to a +taxidermist. It was exceedingly cosey, and the business was +probably not so great as to overwork any one. He might send the +birds and beasts which were brought to be stuffed to some +practical operator, and have him put them in proper condition for +the customers. He might-- But no. It would be very +unsatisfactory to engage in a business of which he knew +absolutely nothing. A taxidermist ought not to blush with +ignorance when asked some simple question about a little dead +bird or a defunct fish. And so he tore himself from the window +of this fascinating place, where, he fancied, had his education +been differently managed, he could in time have shown the world +the spectacle of a cheerful and unblighted Mr. Venus. + +The shop which at last appeared to suit him best was one +which he had passed and looked at several times before it struck +him favorably. It was in a small brick house in a side street, +but not far from one of the main business avenues of the city. +The shop seemed devoted to articles of stationery and small +notions of various kinds not easy to be classified. He had +stopped to look at three penknives fastened to a card, which was +propped up in the little show-window, supported on one side by a +chess-board with "History of Asia" in gilt letters on the back, +and on the other by a small violin labelled "1 dollar." And as +he gazed past these articles into the interior of the shop, which +was now lighted up, it gradually dawned upon him that it was +something like his ideal of an attractive and interesting +business place. At any rate, he would go in and look at it. He +did not care for a violin, even at the low price marked on the +one in the window, but a new pocket-knife might be useful. +So he walked in and asked to look at pocket-knives. + +The shop was in charge of a very pleasant old lady of about +sixty, who sat sewing behind the little counter. While she went +to the window and very carefully reached over the articles +displayed therein to get the card of penknives, Mr. Tolman looked +about him. The shop was quite small, but there seemed to be a +good deal in it. There were shelves behind the counter, and +there were shelves on the opposite wall, and they all seemed well +filled with something or other. In the corner near the old +lady's chair was a little coal stove with a bright fire in it, +and at the back of the shop, at the top of two steps, was a glass +door partly open, through which he saw a small room, with a red +carpet on the floor, and a little table apparently set for a +meal. + +Mr. Tolman looked at the knives when the old lady showed them +to him, and after a good deal of consideration he selected one +which he thought would be a good knife to give to a boy. Then he +looked over some things in the way of paper-cutters, whist- +markers, and such small matters, which were in a glass case on +the counter. And while he looked at them he talked to the old +lady. + +She was a friendly, sociable body, very glad to have any one +to talk to, and so it was not at all difficult for Mr. Tolman, by +some general remarks, to draw from her a great many points about +herself and her shop. She was a widow, with a son who, from her +remarks, must have been forty years old. He was connected with a +mercantile establishment, and they had lived here for a long +time. While her son was a salesman, and came home every +evening, this was very pleasant. But after he became a +commercial traveller, and was away from the city for months at a +time, she did not like it at all. It was very lonely for her. + +Mr. Tolman's heart rose within him, but he did not interrupt her. + +"If I could do it," said she, "I would give up this place, +and go and live with my sister in the country. It would be +better for both of us, and Henry could come there just as well as +here when he gets back from his trips." + +"Why don't you sell out?" asked Mr. Tolman, a little +fearfully, for he began to think that all this was too easy +sailing to be entirely safe. + +"That would not be easy," said she, with a smile. "It might +be a long time before we could find any one who would want to +take the place. We have a fair trade in the store, but it isn't +what it used to be when times were better. And the library is +falling off, too. Most of the books are getting pretty old, and +it don't pay to spend much money for new ones now." + +"The library!" said Mr. Tolman. "Have you a library?" + +"Oh, yes," replied the old lady. "I've had a circulating +library here for nearly fifteen years. There it is on those two +upper shelves behind you." + +Mr. Tolman turned, and beheld two long rows of books in +brown-paper covers, with a short step-ladder, standing near the +door of the inner room, by which these shelves might be reached. +This pleased him greatly. He had had no idea that there was a +library here. + +"I declare!" said he. "It must be very pleasant to manage a +circulating library--a small one like this, I mean. I shouldn't +mind going into a business of the kind myself." + +The old lady looked up, surprised. Did he wish to go into +business? She had not supposed that, just from looking at him. + +Mr. Tolman explained his views to her. He did not tell what +he had been doing in the way of business, or what Mr. Canterfield +was doing for him now. He merely stated his present wishes, and +acknowledged to her that it was the attractiveness of her +establishment that had led him to come in. + +"Then you do not want the penknife?" she said quickly. + +"Oh, yes, I do," said he. "And I really believe, if we can +come to terms, that I would like the two other knives, together +with the rest of your stock in trade." + +The old lady laughed a little nervously. She hoped very much +indeed that they could come to terms. She brought a chair from +the back room, and Mr. Tolman sat down with her by the stove to +talk it over. Few customers came in to interrupt them, and they +talked the matter over very thoroughly. They both came to the +conclusion that there would be no difficulty about terms, nor +about Mr. Tolman's ability to carry on the business after a very +little instruction from the present proprietress. When Mr. +Tolman left, it was with the understanding that he was to call +again in a couple of days, when the son Henry would be at home, +and matters could be definitely arranged. + +When the three met, the bargain was soon struck. As each +party was so desirous of making it, few difficulties were +interposed. The old lady, indeed, was in favor of some delay in +the transfer of the establishment, as she would like to clean and +dust every shelf and corner and every article in the place. But +Mr. Tolman was in a hurry to take possession; and as the son +Henry would have to start off on another trip in a short time, he +wanted to see his mother moved and settled before he left. There +was not much to move but trunks and bandboxes, and some +antiquated pieces of furniture of special value to the old lady, +for Mr. Tolman insisted on buying everything in the house, just +as it stood. The whole thing did not cost him, he said to +himself, as much as some of his acquaintances would pay for a +horse. The methodical son Henry took an account of stock, and +Mr. Tolman took several lessons from the old lady, in which she +explained to him how to find out the selling prices of the +various articles from the marks on the little tags attached to +them. And she particularly instructed him in the management of +the circulating library. She informed him of the character of +the books, and, as far as possible, of the character of the +regular patrons. She told him whom he might trust to take out a +book without paying for the one brought in, if they didn't happen +to have the change with them, and she indicated with little +crosses opposite their names those persons who should be required +to pay cash down for what they had had, before receiving +further benefits. + +It was astonishing to see what interest Mr. Tolman took in +all this. He was really anxious to meet some of the people about +whom the old lady discoursed. He tried, too, to remember a few +of the many things she told him of her methods of buying and +selling, and the general management of her shop; and he probably +did not forget more than three fourths of what she told him. + +Finally everything was settled to the satisfaction of the two +male parties to the bargain,--although the old lady thought of a +hundred things she would yet like to do,--and one fine frosty +afternoon a cart-load of furniture and baggage left the door, the +old lady and her son took leave of the old place, and Mr. Tolman +was left sitting behind the little counter, the sole manager and +proprietor of a circulating library and a stationery and notion +shop. He laughed when he thought of it, but he rubbed his hands +and felt very well satisfied. + +"There is nothing really crazy about it," he said to himself. +"If there is a thing that I think I would like, and I can afford +to have it, and there's no harm in it, why not have it?" + +There was nobody there to say anything against this, so Mr. +Tolman rubbed his hands again before the fire, and rose to walk +up and down his shop, and wonder who would be his first customer. + +In the course of twenty minutes a little boy opened the door +and came in. Mr. Tolman hastened behind the counter to receive +his commands. The little boy wanted two sheets of note-paper and +an envelope. + +"Any particular kind!" asked Mr. Tolman. + +The boy didn't know of any particular variety being desired. +He thought the same kind she always got would do. And he looked +very hard at Mr. Tolman, evidently wondering at the change in the +shopkeeper, but asking no questions. + +"You are a regular customer, I suppose," said Mr. Tolman, +opening several boxes of paper which he had taken down from the +shelves. "I have just begun business here, and don't know what +kind of paper you have been in the habit of buying. But I +suppose this will do." And he took out a couple of sheets of the +best, with an envelope to match. These he carefully tied up in a +piece of thin brown paper, and gave to the boy, who handed him +three cents. Mr. Tolman took them, smiled, and then, having made +a rapid calculation, he called to the boy, who was just opening +the door, and gave him back one cent. + +"You have paid me too much," he said. + +The boy took the cent, looked at Mr. Tolman, and then got out +of the store as quickly as he could. + +"Such profits as that are enormous," said Mr. Tolman, "but I +suppose the small sales balance them." This Mr. Tolman +subsequently found to be the case. + +One or two other customers came in in the course of the +afternoon, and about dark the people who took out books began to +arrive. These kept Mr. Tolman very busy. He not only had to do +a good deal of entering and cancelling, but he had to answer a +great many questions about the change in proprietorship, and the +probability of his getting in some new books, with suggestions as +to the quantity and character of these, mingled with a few +dissatisfied remarks in regard to the volumes already on hand. + +Every one seemed sorry that the old lady had gone away. But +Mr. Tolman was so pleasant and anxious to please, and took such +an interest in their selection of books, that only one of the +subscribers appeared to take the change very much to heart. This +was a young man who was forty-three cents in arrears. He +was a long time selecting a book, and when at last he brought it +to Mr. Tolman to be entered, he told him in a low voice that he +hoped there would be no objection to letting his account run on +for a little while longer. On the first of the month he would +settle it, and then he hoped to be able to pay cash whenever +he brought in a book. + +Mr. Tolman looked for his name on the old lady's list, and, +finding no cross against it, told him that it was all right, and +that the first of the month would do very well. The young man +went away perfectly satisfied with the new librarian. Thus did +Mr. Tolman begin to build up his popularity. As the evening grew +on he found himself becoming very hungry. But he did not like to +shut up the shop, for every now and then some one dropped in, +sometimes to ask what time it was, and sometimes to make a little +purchase, while there were still some library patrons coming in +at intervals. + +However, taking courage during a short rest from customers, +he put up the shutters, locked the door, and hurried off to a +hotel, where he partook of a meal such as few keepers of little +shops ever think of indulging in. + +The next morning Mr. Tolman got his own breakfast. This was +delightful. He had seen how cosily the old lady had spread her +table in the little back room, where there was a stove suitable +for any cooking he might wish to indulge in, and he longed for +such a cosey meal. There were plenty of stock provisions in the +house, which he had purchased with the rest of the goods, and he +went out and bought himself a fresh loaf of bread. Then he +broiled a piece of ham, made some good strong tea, boiled some +eggs, and had a breakfast on the little round table which, though +plain enough, he enjoyed more than any breakfast at his club +which he could remember. He had opened the shop, and sat facing +the glass door, hoping, almost, that there would be some +interruption to his meal. It would seem so much more proper in +that sort of business if he had to get up and go attend to a +customer. + +Before the evening of that day Mr. Tolman became convinced +that he would soon be obliged to employ a boy or some one to +attend to the establishment during his absence. After breakfast, +a woman recommended by the old lady came to make his bed and +clean up generally, but when she had gone he was left alone with +his shop. He determined not to allow this responsibility to +injure his health, and so at one o'clock boldly locked the shop +door and went out to his lunch. He hoped that no one would call +during his absence, but when he returned he found a little girl +with a pitcher standing at the door. She came to borrow half a +pint of milk. + +"Milk!" exclaimed Mr. Tolman, in surprise. "Why, my child, I +have no milk. I don't even use it in my tea." + +The little girl looked very much disappointed. "Is Mrs. +Walker gone away for good?" said she. + +"Yes," replied Mr. Tolman. "But I would be just as willing +to lend you the milk as she would be, if I had any. Is there any +place near here where you can buy milk?" + +"Oh, yes," said the girl. "You can get it round in the +market-house." + +"How much would half a pint cost?" he asked. + +"Three cents," replied the girl. + +"Well, then," said Mr. Tolman, "here are three cents. You can go +and buy the milk for me, and then you can borrow it. Will that +suit?" + +The girl thought it would suit very well, and away she went. + +Even this little incident pleased Mr. Tolman. It was so very +novel. When he came back from his dinner in the evening, he +found two circulating library subscribers stamping their feet on +the door-step, and he afterwards heard that several others had +called and gone away. It would certainly injure the library if +he suspended business at meal-times. He could easily have his +choice of a hundred boys if he chose to advertise for one, but he +shrank from having a youngster in the place. It would interfere +greatly with his cosiness and his experiences. He might possibly +find a boy who went to school, and who would be willing to come +at noon and in the evening if he were paid enough. But it would +have to be a very steady and responsible boy. He would think it +over before taking any steps. + +He thought it over for a day or two, but he did not spend his +whole time in doing so. When he had no customers, he sauntered +about in the little parlor over the shop, with its odd old +furniture, its quaint prints on the walls, and its absurd +ornaments on the mantelpiece. The other little rooms seemed +almost as funny to him, and he was sorry when the bell on the +shop door called him down from their contemplation. It was +pleasant to him to think that he owned all these odd things. The +ownership of the varied goods in the shop also gave him an +agreeable feeling which none of his other possessions had ever +afforded him. It was all so odd and novel. + +He liked much to look over the books in the library. Many of +them were old novels, the names of which were familiar enough to +him, but which he had never read. He determined to read some of +them as soon as he felt fixed and settled. + +In looking over the book in which the names and accounts of +the subscribers were entered, he amused himself by wondering what +sort of persons they were who had out certain books. Who, for +instance, wanted to read "The Book of Cats," and who could +possibly care for "The Mysteries of Udolpho"? But the unknown +person in regard to whom Mr. Tolman felt the greatest curiosity +was the subscriber who now had in his possession a volume +entitled "Dormstock's Logarithms of the Diapason." + +"How on earth," exclaimed Mr. Tolman, "did such a book get +into this library? And where on earth did the person spring from +who would want to take it out? And not only want to take it," he +continued, as he examined the entry regarding the volume, "but +come and have it renewed one, two, three, four--nine times! He +has had that book for eighteen weeks!" + +Without exactly making up his mind to do so, Mr. Tolman +deferred taking steps toward getting an assistant until P. +Glascow, the person in question, should make an appearance, and +it was nearly time for the book to be brought in again. + +"If I get a boy now," thought Mr. Tolman, "Glascow will be +sure to come and bring the book while I am out." + +In almost exactly two weeks from the date of the last renewal +of the book, P. Glascow came in. It was the middle of the +afternoon, and Mr. Tolman was alone. This investigator of +musical philosophy was a quiet young man of about thirty, wearing +a light-brown cloak, and carrying under one arm a large book. + +P. Glascow was surprised when he heard of the change in the +proprietorship of the library. Still, he hoped that there would +be no objection to his renewing the book which he had with him, +and which he had taken out some time ago. + +"Oh, no," said Mr. Tolman, "none in the world. In fact, I +don't suppose there are any other subscribers who would want it. +I have had the curiosity to look to see if it had ever been taken +out before, and I find it has not." + +The young man smiled quietly. "No," said he, "I suppose not. It +is not every one who would care to study the higher mathematics +of music, especially when treated as Dormstock treats the +subject." + +"He seems to go into it pretty deeply," remarked Mr. Tolman, who +had taken up the book. "At least, I should think so, judging +from all these calculations, and problems, and squares, and +cubes." + +"Indeed he does," said Glascow. "And although I have had the +book some months, and have more reading time at my disposal than +most persons, I have only reached the fifty-sixth page, and doubt +if I shall not have to review some of that before I can feel that +I thoroughly understand it." + +"And there are three hundred and forty pages in all!" said +Mr. Tolman, compassionately. + +"Yes," replied the other. "But I am quite sure that the +matter will grow easier as I proceed. I have found that out from +what I have already done." + +"You say you have a good deal of leisure?" remarked Mr. +Tolman. "Is the musical business dull at present?" + +"Oh, I'm not in the musical business," said Glascow. "I have +a great love for music, and wish to thoroughly understand it. +But my business is quite different. I am a night druggist, and +that is the reason I have so much leisure for reading." + +"A night druggist?" repeated Mr. Tolman, inquiringly. + +"Yes, sir," said the other. "I am in a large downtown drug +store which is kept open all night, and I go on duty after the +day clerks leave." + +"And does that give you more leisure?" asked Mr. Tolman. + +"It seems to," answered Glascow. "I sleep until about noon, +and then I have the rest of the day, until seven o'clock, to +myself. I think that people who work at night can make a more +satisfactory use of their own time than those who work in the +daytime. In the summer I can take a trip on the river, or go +somewhere out of town, every day, if I like." + +"Daylight is more available for many things, that is true," +said Mr. Tolman. "But is it not dreadfully lonely sitting in a +drug store all night? There can't be many people to come to buy +medicine at night. I thought there was generally a night-bell to +drug stores, by which a clerk could be awakened if anybody wanted +anything." + +"It's not very lonely in our store at night," said +Glascow. "In fact, it's often more lively then than in the +daytime. You see, we are right down among the newspaper offices, +and there's always somebody coming in for soda-water, or cigars, +or something or other. The store is a bright, warm place for the +night editors and reporters to meet together and talk and drink +hot soda, and there's always a knot of 'em around the stove about +the time the papers begin to go to press. And they're a lively +set, I can tell you, sir. I've heard some of the best stories I +ever heard in my life told in our place after three o'clock in +the morning." + +"A strange life!" said Mr. Tolman. "Do you know, I never +thought that people amused themselves in that way--and night +after night, I suppose." + +"Yes, sir, night after night, Sundays and all." + +The night druggist now took up his book. + +"Going home to read?" asked Mr. Tolman. + +"Well, no," said the other. "It's rather cold this afternoon +to read. I think I'll take a brisk walk." + +"Can't you leave your book until you return!" asked Mr. +Tolman. "That is, if you will come back this way. It's an +awkward book to carry about." + +"Thank you, I will," said Glascow. "I shall come back this +way." + +When he had gone, Mr. Tolman took up the book, and began to +look over it more carefully than he had done before. But his +examination did not last long. + +"How anybody of common sense can take any interest in this +stuff is beyond my comprehension," said Mr. Tolman, as he closed +the book and put it on a little shelf behind the counter. + +When Glascow came back, Mr. Tolman asked him to stay and +warm himself. And then, after they had talked for a short time, +Mr. Tolman began to feel hungry. He had his winter appetite, and +had lunched early. So said he to the night druggist, who had +opened his "Dormstock," "How would you like to sit here and read +awhile, while I go and get my dinner? I will light the gas, and +you can be very comfortable here, if you are not in a hurry." + +P. Glascow was in no hurry at all, and was very glad to have +some quiet reading by a warm fire; and so Mr. Tolman left him, +feeling perfectly confident that a man who had been allowed by +the old lady to renew a book nine times must be perfectly +trustworthy. + +When Mr. Tolman returned, the two had some further +conversation in the corner by the little stove. + +"It must be rather annoying," said the night druggist, "not +to be able to go out to your meals without shutting up your shop. +If you like," said he, rather hesitatingly, "I will stop in about +this time in the afternoon, and stay here while you go to dinner. +I'll be glad to do this until you get an assistant. I can easily +attend to most people who come in, and others can wait." + +Mr. Tolman jumped at this proposition. It was exactly what +he wanted. + +So P. Glascow came every afternoon and read "Dormstock" while +Mr. Tolman went to dinner; and before long he came at lunch-time +also. It was just as convenient as not, he said. He had +finished his breakfast, and would like to read awhile. Mr. +Tolman fancied that the night druggist's lodgings were, perhaps, +not very well warmed, which idea explained the desire to walk +rather than read on a cold afternoon. Glascow's name was +entered on the free list, and he always took away the "Dormstock" +at night, because he might have a chance of looking into it at +the store, when custom began to grow slack in the latter part of +the early morning. + +One afternoon there came into the shop a young lady, who +brought back two books which she had had for more than a month. +She made no excuses for keeping the books longer than the +prescribed time, but simply handed them in and paid her fine. +Mr. Tolman did not like to take this money, for it was the first +of the kind he had received; but the young lady looked as if she +were well able to afford the luxury of keeping books over their +time, and business was business. So he gravely gave her her +change. Then she said she would like to take out "Dormstock's +Logarithms of the Diapason." + +Mr. Tolman stared at her. She was a bright, handsome young +lady, and looked as if she had very good sense. He could not +understand it. But he told her the book was out. + +"Out!" she said. "Why, it's always out. It seems strange to +me that there should be such a demand for that book. I have been +trying to get it for ever so long." + +"It IS strange," said Mr. Tolman, "but it is certainly in +demand. Did Mrs. Walker ever make you any promises about it?" + +"No," said she, "but I thought my turn would come around some +time. And I particularly want the book just now." + +Mr. Tolman felt somewhat troubled. He knew that the night +druggist ought not to monopolize the volume, and yet he did +not wish to disoblige one who was so useful to him, and who took +such an earnest interest in the book. And he could not temporize +with the young lady, and say that he thought the book would soon +be in. He knew it would not. There were three hundred and forty +pages of it. So he merely remarked that he was sorry. + +"So am I, " said the young lady, "very sorry. It so happens +that just now I have a peculiar opportunity for studying that +book which may not occur again." + +There was something in Mr. Tolman's sympathetic face which +seemed to invite her confidence, and she continued. + +"I am a teacher," she said, "and on account of certain +circumstances I have a holiday for a month, which I intended to +give up almost entirely to the study of music, and I particularly +wanted "Dormstock." Do you think there is any chance of its +early return, and will you reserve it for me?" + +"Reserve it!" said Mr. Tolman. "Most certainly I will." And +then he reflected a second or two. "If you will come here the +day after to-morrow, I will be able to tell you something +definite." + +She said she would come. + +Mr. Tolman was out a long time at lunch-time the next day. +He went to all the leading book-stores to see if he could buy a +copy of Dormstock's great work. But he was unsuccessful. The +booksellers told him that there was no probability that he could +get a copy in the country, unless, indeed, he found it in the +stock of some second-hand dealer, and that even if he sent to +England for it, where it was published, it was not likely he +could get it, for it had been long out of print. There was +no demand at all for it. The next day he went to several second- +hand stores, but no "Dormstock" could he find. + +When he came back he spoke to Glascow on the subject. He was +sorry to do so, but thought that simple justice compelled him to +mention the matter. The night druggist was thrown into a +perturbed state of mind by the information that some one wanted +his beloved book. + +"A woman!" he exclaimed. "Why, she would not understand two +pages out of the whole of it. It is too bad. I didn't suppose +any one would want this book." + +"Do not disturb yourself too much," said Mr. Tolman. "I am +not sure that you ought to give it up." + +"I am very glad to hear you say so," said Glascow. "I have +no doubt it is only a passing fancy with her. I dare say she +would really rather have a good new novel." And then, having +heard that the lady was expected that afternoon, he went out to +walk, with the "Dormstock" under his arm. + +When the young lady arrived, an hour or so later, she was not +at all satisfied to take out a new novel, and was very sorry +indeed not to find the "Logarithms of the Diapason" waiting for +her. Mr. Tolman told her that he had tried to buy another copy +of the work, and for this she expressed herself gratefully. He +also found himself compelled to say that the book was in the +possession of a gentleman who had had it for some time--all the +time it had been out, in fact--and had not yet finished it. + +At this the young lady seemed somewhat nettled. + +"Is it not against the rules for any person to keep one book +out so long?" she asked. + +"No," said Mr. Tolman. "I have looked into that. Our rules +are very simple, and merely say that a book may be renewed by the +payment of a certain sum." + +"Then I am never to have it?" remarked the young lady. + +"Oh, I wouldn't despair about it," said Mr. Tolman. "He has +not had time to reflect upon the matter. He is a reasonable +young man, and I believe that he will be willing to give up his +study of the book for a time and let you take it." + +"No," said she, "I don't wish that. If he is studying, as +you say he is, day and night, I do not wish to interrupt him. I +should want the book at least a month, and that, I suppose, would +upset his course of study entirely. But I do not think any one +should begin in a circulating library to study a book that will +take him a year to finish; for, from what you say, it will take +this gentleman at least that time to finish Dormstock's book." +So she went her way. + +When P. Glascow heard all this in the evening, he was very +grave. He had evidently been reflecting. + +"It is not fair," said he. "I ought not to keep the book so +long. I now give it up for a while. You may let her have it +when she comes." And he put the "Dormstock" on the counter, and +went and sat down by the stove. + +Mr. Tolman was grieved. He knew the night druggist had done +right, but still he was sorry for him. "What will you do?" he +asked. "Will you stop your studies?" + +"Oh, no," said Glascow, gazing solemnly into the stove. +"I will take up some other books on the diapason which I have, +and so will keep my ideas fresh on the subject until this lady is +done with the book. I do not really believe she will study it +very long." Then he added: "If it is all the same to you, I +will come around here and read, as I have been doing, until you +shall get a regular assistant." + +Mr. Tolman would be delighted to have him come, he said. He +had entirely given up the idea of getting an assistant, but this +he did not say. + +It was some time before the lady came back, and Mr. Tolman +was afraid she was not coming at all. But she did come, and +asked for Mrs. Burney's "Evelina." She smiled when she named the +book, and said that she believed she would have to take a novel, +after all, and she had always wanted to read that one. + +"I wouldn't take a novel if I were you," said Mr. Tolman; and +he triumphantly took down the "Dormstock" and laid it before her. + +She was evidently much pleased, but when he told her of Mr. +Glascow's gentlemanly conduct in the matter, her countenance +instantly changed. + +"Not at all," said she, laying down the book. "I will not +break up his study. I will take the `Evelina' if you please." + +And as no persuasion from Mr. Tolman had any effect upon her, +she went away with Mrs. Burney's novel in her muff. + +"Now, then," said Mr. Tolman to Glascow, in the evening, "you +may as well take the book along with you. She won't have it." + +But Glascow would do nothing of the kind. "No," he remarked, +as he sat looking into the stove. "When I said I would let +her have it, I meant it. She'll take it when she sees that it +continues to remain in the library." + +Glascow was mistaken: she did not take it, having the idea +that he would soon conclude that it would be wiser for him to +read it than to let it stand idly on the shelf. + +"It would serve them both right," said Mr. Tolman to himself, +"if somebody else should come and take it." But there was no one +else among his subscribers who would even think of such a thing. + +One day, however, the young lady came in and asked to look at +the book. "Don't think that I am going to take it out," she +said, noticing Mr. Tolman's look of pleasure as he handed her the +volume. "I only wish to see what he says on a certain subject +which I am studying now." And so she sat down by the stove on +the chair which Mr. Tolman placed for her, and opened +"Dormstock." + +She sat earnestly poring over the book for half an hour or +more, and then she looked up and said: "I really cannot make out +what this part means. Excuse my troubling you, but I would be +very glad if you would explain the latter part of this passage." + +"Me!" exclaimed Mr. Tolman. "Why, my good madam,--miss, I +mean,--I couldn't explain it to you if it were to save my life. +But what page is it?" said he, looking at his watch. + +"Page twenty-four," answered the young lady. + +"Oh, well, then," said he, "if you can wait ten or fifteen +minutes, the gentleman who has had the book will be here, and I +think he can explain anything in the first part of the work." + +The young lady seemed to hesitate whether to wait or not; but +as she had a certain curiosity to see what sort of a person he +was who had been so absorbed in the book, she concluded to sit a +little longer and look into some other parts of the volume. + +The night druggist soon came in, and when Mr. Tolman +introduced him to the lady, he readily agreed to explain the +passage to her if he could. So Mr. Tolman got him a chair from +the inner room, and he also sat down by the stove. + +The explanation was difficult, but it was achieved at last, +and then the young lady broached the subject of leaving the book +unused. This was discussed for some time, but came to nothing, +although Mr. Tolman put down his afternoon paper and joined in +the argument, urging, among other points, that as the matter now +stood he was deprived by the dead-lock of all income from the +book. But even this strong argument proved of no avail. + +"Then I will tell you what I wish you would do," said Mr. +Tolman, as the young lady rose to go: "come here and look at the +book whenever you wish to do so. I would like to make this more +of a reading-room, anyway. It would give me more company." + +After this the young lady looked into "Dormstock" when she +came in; and as her holidays had been extended by the continued +absence of the family in which she taught, she had plenty of time +for study, and came quite frequently. She often met Glascow in +the shop, and on such occasions they generally consulted +"Dormstock," and sometimes had quite lengthy talks on musical +matters. One afternoon they came in together, having met on +their way to the library, and entered into a conversation on +diapasonic logarithms, which continued during the lady's stay in +the shop. + +"The proper thing," thought Mr. Tolman, "would be for these +two people to get married. Then they could take the book and +study it to their heart's content. And they would certainly suit +each other, for they are both greatly attached to musical +mathematics and philosophy, and neither of them either plays or +sings, as they have told me. It would be an admirable match." + +Mr. Tolman thought over this matter a good deal, and at last +determined to mention it to Glascow. When he did so, the young +man colored, and expressed the opinion that it would be of no use +to think of such a thing. But it was evident from his manner and +subsequent discourse that he had thought of it. + +Mr. Tolman gradually became quite anxious on the subject, +especially as the night druggist did not seem inclined to take +any steps in the matter. The weather was now beginning to be +warmer, and Mr. Tolman reflected that the little house and the +little shop were probably much more cosey and comfortable in +winter than in summer. There were higher buildings all about the +house, and even now he began to feel that the circulation of air +would be quite as agreeable as the circulation of books. He +thought a good deal about his airy rooms in the neighboring city. + +"Mr. Glascow," said he, one afternoon, "I have made up my +mind to sell out this business shortly." + +"What!" exclaimed the other. "Do you mean you will give it +up and go away--leave the place altogether?" + +"Yes," replied Mr. Tolman, "I shall give up the place +entirely, and leave the city." + +The night druggist was shocked. He had spent many happy hours in +that shop, and his hours there were now becoming pleasanter than +ever. If Mr. Tolman went away, all this must end. Nothing of +the kind could be expected of any new proprietor. + +"And considering this," continued Mr. Tolman, "I think it +would be well for you to bring your love matters to a conclusion +while I am here to help you." + +"My love matters!" exclaimed Mr. Glascow, with a flush. + +"Yes, certainly," said Mr. Tolman. "I have eyes, and I know +all about it. Now let me tell you what I think. When a thing is +to be done, it ought to be done the first time there is a good +chance. That's the way I do business. Now you might as well +come around here to-morrow afternoon prepared to propose to Miss +Edwards. She is due to-morrow, for she has been two days away. +If she doesn't come, we will postpone the matter until the next +day. But you should be ready to-morrow. I don't believe you can +see her much when you don't meet her here, for that family is +expected back very soon, and from what I infer from her account +of her employers, you won't care to visit her at their house." + +The night druggist wanted to think about it. + +"There is nothing to think," said Mr. Tolman. "We know all +about the lady." (He spoke truly, for he had informed himself +about both parties to the affair.) "Take my advice, and be here +to-morrow afternoon--and come rather early." + +The next morning Mr. Tolman went up to his parlor on the +second floor, and brought down two blue stuffed chairs, the best +he had, and put them in the little room back of the shop. He +also brought down one or two knickknacks and put them on the +mantelpiece, and he dusted and brightened up the room as well as +he could. He even covered the table with a red cloth from the +parlor. + +When the young lady arrived, he invited her to walk into the +back room to look over some new books he had just got in. If she +had known he proposed to give up the business, she would have +thought it rather strange that he should be buying new books. +But she knew nothing of his intentions. When she was seated at +the table whereon the new books were spread, Mr. Tolman stepped +outside of the shop door to watch for Glascow's approach. He +soon appeared. + +"Walk right in," said Mr. Tolman. "She's in the back room +looking over books. I'll wait here, and keep out customers as +far as possible. It's pleasant, and I want a little fresh air. +I'll give you twenty minutes." + +Glascow was pale, but he went in without a word, and Mr. +Tolman, with his hands under his coat-tail, and his feet rather +far apart, established a blockade on the doorstep. He stood +there for some time, looking at the people outside, and wondering +what the people inside were doing. The little girl who had +borrowed the milk of him, and who had never returned it, was +about to pass the door; but seeing him standing there, she +crossed over to the other side of the street. But he did not +notice her. He was wondering if it was time to go in. A boy +came up to the door, and wanted to know if he kept Easter eggs. +Mr. Tolman was happy to say he did not. When he had allowed the +night druggist a very liberal twenty minutes, he went in. As he +entered the shop door, giving the bell a very decided ring as he +did so, P. Glascow came down the two steps that led from the +inner room. His face showed that it was all right with him. + +A few days after this Mr. Tolman sold out his stock, good +will, and fixtures, together with the furniture and lease of the +house. And who should he sell out to but to Mr. Glascow! This +piece of business was one of the happiest points in the whole +affair. There was no reason why the happy couple should not be +married very soon, and the young lady was charmed to give up her +position as teacher and governess in a family, and come and take +charge of that delightful little store and that cunning little +house, with almost everything in it that they wanted. + +One thing in the establishment Mr. Tolman refused to sell. +That was Dormstock's great work. He made the couple a present of +the volume, and between two of the earlier pages he placed a +bank-note which in value was very much more than that of the +ordinary wedding gift. + +"What are YOU going to do?" they asked of him, when all +these things were settled. And then he told them how he was +going back to his business in the neighboring city, and he told +them what it was, and how he had come to manage a circulating +library. They did not think him crazy. People who studied the +logarithms of the diapason would not be apt to think a man crazy +for such a little thing as that. + +When Mr. Tolman returned to the establishment of Pusey & +Co., he found everything going on very satisfactorily. + +"You look ten years younger, sir," said Mr. Canterfield. "You +must have had a very pleasant time. I did not think there +was enough to interest you in ---- for so long a time." + +"Interest me!" exclaimed Mr. Tolman. "Why, objects of interest +crowded on me. I never had a more enjoyable holiday in my life." + +When he went home that evening (and he found himself quite +willing to go), he tore up the will he had made. He now felt +that there was no necessity for proving his sanity. + + + + MY UNWILLING NEIGHBOR + +I was about twenty-five years old when I began life as the owner +of a vineyard in western Virginia. I bought a large tract of +land, the greater part of which lay upon the sloping side of one +of the foot-hills of the Blue Ridge, the exposure being that most +favorable to the growth of the vine. I am an enthusiastic lover +of the country and of country life, and believed that I should +derive more pleasure as well as profit from the culture of my +far-stretching vineyard than I would from ordinary farm +operations. + +I built myself a good house of moderate size upon a little +plateau on the higher part of my estate. Sitting in my porch, +smoking my pipe after the labors of the day, I could look down +over my vineyard into a beautiful valley, with here and there a +little curling smoke arising from some of the few dwellings which +were scattered about among the groves and spreading fields, and +above this beauty I could imagine all my hillside clothed in +green and purple. + +My family consisted of myself alone. It is true that I +expected some day that there would be others in my house besides +myself, but I was not ready for this yet. + +During the summer I found it very pleasant to live by +myself. It was a novelty, and I could arrange and manage +everything in my own fashion, which was a pleasure I had not +enjoyed when I lived in my father's house. But when winter came +I found it very lonely. Even my servants lived in a cabin at +some little distance, and there were many dark and stormy +evenings when the company even of a bore would have been welcome +to me. Sometimes I walked over to the town and visited my +friends there, but this was not feasible on stormy nights, and +the winter seemed to me a very long one. + +But spring came, outdoor operations began, and for a few +weeks I felt again that I was all-sufficient for my own pleasure +and comfort. Then came a change. One of those seasons of bad +and stormy weather which so frequently follow an early spring +settled down upon my spirits and my hillside. It rained, it was +cold, fierce winds blew, and I became more anxious for somebody +to talk to than I had been at any time during the winter. + +One night, when a very bad storm was raging, I went to bed +early, and as I lay awake I revolved in my mind a scheme of which +I had frequently thought before. I would build a neat little +house on my grounds, not very far away from my house, but not too +near, and I would ask Jack Brandiger to come there and live. +Jack was a friend of mine who was reading law in the town, and it +seemed to me that it would be much more pleasant, and even more +profitable, to read law on a pretty hillside overlooking a +charming valley, with woods and mountains behind and above him, +where he could ramble to his heart's content. + +I had thought of asking Jack to come and live with me, +but this idea I soon dismissed. I am a very particular person, +and Jack was not. He left his pipes about in all sorts of +places--sometimes when they were still lighted. When he came to +see me he was quite as likely to put his hat over the inkstand as +to put it anywhere else. But if Jack lived at a little distance, +and we could go backward and forward to see each other whenever +we pleased, that would be quite another thing. He could do as he +pleased in his own house, and I could do as I pleased in mine, +and we might have many pleasant evenings together. This was a +cheering idea, and I was planning how we might arrange with the +negro woman who managed my household affairs to attend also to +those of Jack when I fell asleep. + +I did not sleep long before I was awakened by the increased +violence of the storm. My house shook with the fury of the wind. + +The rain seemed to be pouring on its roof and northern side as if +there were a waterfall above us, and every now and then I could +hear a shower of hailstones rattling against the shutters. My +bedroom was one of the rooms on the lower floor, and even there I +could hear the pounding of the deluge and the hailstones upon the +roof. + +All this was very doleful, and had a tendency to depress the +spirits of a man awake and alone in a good-sized house. But I +shook off this depression. It was, not agreeable to be up here +by myself in such a terrible storm, but there was nothing to be +afraid of, as my house was new and very strongly built, being +constructed of logs, weather-boarded outside and ceiled within. +It would require a hurricane to blow off the roof, and I believed +my shutters to be hail-proof. So, as there was no reason to +stay awake, I turned over and went to sleep. + +I do not know how long it was before I was awakened again, +this time not by the noise of the storm, but by a curious +movement of my bedstead. I had once felt the slight shock of an +earthquake, and it seemed to me that this must be something of +the kind. Certainly my bed moved under me. I sat up. The room +was pitchy dark. In a moment I felt another movement, but this +time it did not seem to me to resemble an earthquake shock. Such +motion, I think, is generally in horizontal directions, while +that which I felt was more like the movement of a ship upon the +water. The storm was at its height; the wind raged and roared, +and the rain seemed to be pouring down as heavily as ever. + +I was about to get up and light the lamp, for even the +faintest candle-flame would be some sort of company at such a +grewsome moment, when my bedstead gave another movement, more +shiplike than before. It actually lurched forward as if it were +descending into the trough of the sea, but, unlike a ship, it did +not rise again, but remained in such a slanting position that I +began to slide down toward the foot. I believe that if it had +not been a bedstead provided with a footboard, I should have +slipped out upon the floor. + +I did not jump out of bed. I did not do anything. I was +trying to think, to understand the situation, to find out whether +I was asleep or awake, when I became aware of noises in the room +and all over the house which even through the din of the storm +made themselves noticed by their peculiarity. Tables, everything +in the room, seemed to be grating and grinding on the floor, +and in a moment there was a crash. I knew what that meant; my +lamp had slipped off the table. Any doubt on that point would +have been dispelled by the smell of kerosene which soon filled +the air of the room. + +The motion of the bed, which I now believe must have been the +motion of the whole house, still continued; but the grating +noises in the room gradually ceased, from which I inferred that +the furniture had brought up against the front wall of the room. + +It now was impossible for me to get up and strike a light, +for to do so with kerosene oil all over the floor and its vapor +diffused through the room would probably result in setting the +house on fire. So I must stay in darkness and wait. I do not +think I was very much frightened--I was so astonished that there +was no room in my mind for fear. In fact, all my mental energies +were occupied in trying to find out what had happened. It +required, however, only a few more minutes of reflection, and a +few more minutes of the grating, bumping, trembling of my house, +to enable me to make up my mind what was happening. My house was +sliding downhill! + +The wind must have blown the building from its foundations, +and upon the slippery surface of the hillside, probably lashed +into liquid mud by the pouring rain, it was making its way down +toward the valley! In a flash my mind's eye ran over the whole +surface of the country beneath me as far as I knew it. I was +almost positive that there was no precipice, no terrible chasm +into which my house might fall. There was nothing but sloping +hillside, and beneath that a wide stretch of fields. + +Now there was a new and sudden noise of heavy objects falling +upon the roof, and I knew what that meant: my chimney had been +wrenched from its foundations, and the upper part of it had now +toppled over. I could hear, through the storm, the bricks +banging and sliding upon the slanting roof. Continuous sounds of +cracking and snapping came to me through the closed front +windows, and these were caused, I supposed, by the destruction of +the stakes of my vines as the heavy house moved over them. + +Of course, when I thoroughly understood the state of the +case, my first impulse was to spring out of bed, and, as quickly +as possible, to get out of that thumping and sliding house. But +I restrained myself. The floor might be covered with broken +glass, I might not be able to find my clothes in the darkness and +in the jumble of furniture at the end of the room, and even if I +could dress myself, it would be folly to jump out in the midst of +that raging storm into a probable mass of wreckage which I could +not see. It would be far better to remain dry and warm under my +roof. There was no reason whatever to suppose that the house +would go to pieces, or that it would turn over. It must stop +some time or other, and, until it did so, I would be safer in my +bed than anywhere else. Therefore in my bed I stayed. + +Sitting upright, with my feet pressed against the footboard, +I listened and felt. The noises of the storm, and the cracking +and the snapping and grinding before me and under me, still +continued, although I sometimes thought that the wind was +moderating a little, and that the strange motion was becoming +more regular. I believed the house was moving faster than +when it first began its strange career, but that it was sliding +over a smooth surface. Now I noticed a succession of loud cracks +and snaps at the front of the house, and, from the character of +the sounds, I concluded that my little front porch, which had +been acting as a cutwater at the bow of my shiplike house, had +yielded at last to the rough contact with the ground, and would +probably soon be torn away. This did not disturb me, for the +house must still be firm. + +It was not long before I perceived that the slanting of my +bed was becoming less and less, and also I was quite sure that +the house was moving more slowly. Then the crackings and +snappings before my front wall ceased altogether. The bed +resumed its ordinary horizontal position, and although I did not +know at what moment the house had ceased sliding and had come to +a standstill, I was sure that it had done so. It was now resting +upon a level surface. The room was still perfectly dark, and the +storm continued. It was useless for me to get up until daylight +came,--I could not see what had happened,--so I lay back upon my +pillow and tried to imagine upon what level portion of my farm I +had stranded. While doing this I fell asleep. + +When I woke, a little light was stealing into the room +through the blinds of my shutters. I quickly slipped out of bed, +opened a window, and looked out. Day was just breaking, the rain +and wind had ceased, and I could discern objects. But it seemed +as if I needed some light in my brain to enable me to comprehend +what I saw. My eyes fell upon nothing familiar. + +I did not stop to investigate, however, from my window. +I found my clothes huddled together with the furniture at the +front end of the room, and as soon as I was dressed I went into +the hall and then to my front door. I quickly jerked this open +and was about to step outside when, suddenly, I stopped. I was +positive that my front porch had been destroyed. But there I saw +a porch a little lower than mine and a great deal wider, and on +the other side of it, not more than eight feet from me, was a +window--the window of a house, and on the other side of the +window was a face--the face of a young girl! As I stood staring +in blank amazement at the house which presented itself at my +front door, the face at the window disappeared, and I was left to +contemplate the scene by myself. I ran to my back door and threw +it open. There I saw, stretching up the fields and far up the +hillside, the wide path which my house had made as it came down +from its elevated position to the valley beneath, where it had +ended its onward career by stopping up against another house. As +I looked from the back porch I saw that the ground still +continued to slope, so that if my house had not found in its path +another building, it would probably have proceeded somewhat +farther on its course. It was lighter, and I saw bushes and +fences and outbuildings--I was in a back yard. + +Almost breathless with amazement and consternation, I ran +again to the front door. When I reached it I found a young woman +standing on the porch of the house before me. I was about to say +something--I know not what--when she put her finger on her lips +and stepped forward. + +"Please don't speak loudly," she said. "I am afraid it will +frighten mother. She is asleep yet. I suppose you and your +house have been sliding downhill?" + +"That is what has happened," said I. "But I cannot +understand it. It seems to me the most amazing thing that ever +took place on the face of the earth." + +"It is very queer," said she, "but hurricanes do blow away +houses, and that must have been a hurricane we had last night, +for the wind was strong enough to loosen any house. I have often +wondered if that house would ever slide downhill." + +"My house?" + +"Yes," she said. "Soon after it was built I began to think +what a nice clean sweep it could make from the place where it +seemed to be stuck to the side of the mountain, right down here +into the valley." + +I could not talk with a girl like this; at least, I could not +meet her on her own conversational grounds. I was so agitated +myself that it seemed unnatural that any one to whom I should +speak should not also be agitated. + +"Who are you?" I asked rather brusquely. "At least, to whom +does this house belong?" + +"This is my mother's house," said she. "My mother is Mrs. +Carson. We happen just now to be living here by ourselves, so I +cannot call on any man to help you do anything. My brother has +always lived with us, but last week he went away." + +"You don't seem to be a bit astonished at what has happened," +said I. + +She was rather a pretty girl, of a cheerful disposition, I +should say, for several times she had smiled as she spoke. + +"Oh, I am astonished," she answered; "or, at least, I +was. But I have had time enough to get over some of it. It was +at least an hour ago when I was awakened by hearing something +crack in the yard. I went to a window and looked out, and could +just barely see that something like a big building had grown up +during the night. Then I watched it, and watched it, until I +made out it was a whole house; and after that it was not long +before I guessed what had happened. It seemed a simpler thing to +me, you know, than it did to you, because I had often thought +about it, and probably you never had." + +"You are right there," said I, earnestly. "It would have +been impossible for me to imagine such a thing." + +"At first I thought there was nobody in the house," said she, +"but when I heard some one moving about, I came down to tell +whoever had arrived not to make a noise. I see," she added, with +another of her smiles, "that you think I am a very strange person +not to be more flurried by what has happened. But really I +cannot think of anything else just now, except what mother will +say and do when she comes down and finds you and your house here +at the back door. I am very sure she will not like it." + +"Like it!" I exclaimed. "Who on earth could like it?" + +"Please speak more gently," she said. "Mother is always a +little irritable when her night's rest has been broken, and I +would not like to have her wakened up suddenly now. But really, +Mr. Warren, I haven't the least idea in the world how she will +take this thing. I must go in and be with her when she wakes, so +that I can explain just what has happened." + +"One moment," I said. "You know my name." + +"Of course I know your name," she answered. "Could that +house be up there on the hillside for more than a year without my +knowing who lived in it?" With this she went indoors. + +I could not help smiling when I thought of the young lady +regretting that there was no man in the house who might help me +do something. What could anybody do in a case like this? I +turned and went into my house. I entered the various rooms on +the lower floor, and saw no signs of any particular damage, +except that everything movable in each room was jumbled together +against the front wall. But when I looked out of the back door I +found that the porch there was a good deal wrecked, which I had +not noticed before. + +I went up-stairs, and found everything very much as it was +below. Nothing seemed to have been injured except the chimney +and the porches. I thanked my stars that I had used hard wood +instead of mortar for the ceilings of my rooms. + +I was about to go into my bedroom, when I heard a woman +scream, and of course I hurried to the front. There on the back +porch of her house stood Mrs. Carson. She was a woman of middle +age, and, as I glanced at her, I saw where her daughter got her +good looks. But the placidity and cheerfulness of the younger +face were entirely wanting in the mother. Her eyes sparkled, her +cheeks were red, her mouth was partly opened, and it seemed to me +that I could almost see that her breath was hot. + +"Is this your house?" she cried, the moment her eyes fell +upon me. "And what is it doing here?" I did not immediately +answer, I looked at the angry woman, and behind her I saw, +through the open door, the daughter crossing the hallway. It was +plain that she had decided to let me have it out with her mother +without interference. As briefly and as clearly as I could, I +explained what had happened. + +"What is all that to me?" she screamed. "It doesn't matter +to me how your house got here. There have been storms ever since +the beginning of the world, and I never heard of any of them +taking a house into a person's back yard. You ought not to have +built your house where any such thing could happen. But all this +is nothing to me. I don't understand now how your house did get +here, and I don't want to understand it. All I want is for you +to take it away." + +"I will do that, madam, just as soon as I can. You may be +very sure I will do that. But--" + +"Can you do it now?" she asked. "Can you do it to-day? I +don't want a minute lost. I have not been outside to see what +damage has been done, but the first thing to do is to take your +house away." + +"I am going to the town now, madam, to summon assistance." + +Mrs. Carson made no answer, but she turned and walked to the +end of her porch. There she suddenly gave a scream which quickly +brought her daughter from the house. "Kitty! Kitty!" cried her +mother. "Do you know what he has done? He has gone right over +my round flower-garden. His house is sitting on it this minute!" + +"But he could not help it, mother," said Kitty. + +"Help it!" exclaimed Mrs. Carson. "I didn't expect him to +help it. What I want--" Suddenly she stopped. Her eyes flashed +brighter, her mouth opened wider, and she became more and +more excited as she noticed the absence of the sheds, fences, or +vegetable-beds which had found themselves in the course of my +all-destroying dwelling. + +It was now well on in the morning, and some of the neighbors +had become aware of the strange disaster which had happened to +me, although if they had heard the news from Mrs. Carson they +might have supposed that it was a disaster which had happened +only to her. As they gazed at the two houses so closely jammed +together, all of them wondered, some of them even laughed, but +not one offered a suggestion which afforded satisfaction to Mrs. +Carson or myself. The general opinion was that, now my house was +there, it would have to stay there, for there were not enough +horses in the State to pull it back up that mountainside. To be +sure, it might possibly be drawn off sidewise. But whether it +was moved one way or the other, a lot of Mrs. Carson's trees +would have to be cut down to let it pass. + +"Which shall never happen!" cried that good lady. "If +nothing else can be done, it must be taken apart and hauled off +in carts. But no matter how it is managed, it must be moved, and +that immediately." Miss Carson now prevailed upon her mother to +go into the house, and I stayed and talked to the men and a few +women who had gathered outside. + +When they had said all they had to say, and seen all there +was to see, these people went home to their breakfasts. I +entered my house, but not by the front door, for to do that I +would have been obliged to trespass upon Mrs. Carson's back +porch. I got my hat, and was about to start for the town, when I +heard my name called. Turning into the hall, I saw Miss +Carson, who was standing at my front door. + +"Mr. Warren," said she, "you haven't any way of getting +breakfast, have you?" + +"Oh, no," said I. "My servants are up there in their cabin, +and I suppose they are too much scared to come down. But I am +going to town to see what can be done about my house, and will +get my breakfast there." + +"It's a long way to go without anything to eat," she said, +"and we can give you some breakfast. But I want to ask you +something. I am in a good deal of perplexity. Our two servants +are out at the front of the house, but they positively refuse to +come in; they are afraid that your house may begin sliding again +and crush them all, so, I shall have to get breakfast. But what +bothers me is trying to find our well. I have been outside, and +can see no signs of it." + +"Where was your well?" I gasped. + +"It ought to be somewhere near the back of your house," she +said. "May I go through your hall and look out?" + +"Of course you may," I cried, and I preceded her to my back +door. + +"Now, it seems to me," she said, after surveying the scene of +desolation immediately before, and looking from side to side +toward objects which had remained untouched, "that your house has +passed directly over our well, and must have carried away the +little shed and the pump and everything above ground. I should +not wonder a bit," she continued slowly, "if it is under your +porch." + +I jumped to the ground, for the steps were shattered, and began +to search for the well, and it was not long before I discovered +its round dark opening, which was, as Miss Carson had imagined, +under one end of my porch. + +"What can we do?" she asked. "We can't have breakfast or get +along at all without water." It was a terribly depressing thing +to me to think that I, or rather my house, had given these people +so much trouble. But I speedily, assured Miss Carson that if she +could find a bucket and a rope which I could lower into the well, +I would provide her with water. + +She went into her house to see what she could find, and I tore +away the broken planks of the porch, so that I could get to the +well. And then, when she came with a tin pail and a clothes- +line, I went to work to haul up water and carry it to her back +door. + +"I don't want mother to find out what has happened to the +well," she said, "for she has enough on her mind already." + +Mrs. Carson was a woman with some good points in her +character. After a time she called to me herself, and told me to +come in to breakfast. But during the meal she talked very +earnestly to me about the amazing trespass I had committed, and +about the means which should be taken to repair the damages my +house had done to her property. I was as optimistic as I could +be, and the young lady spoke very cheerfully and hopefully about +the affair, so that we were beginning to get along somewhat +pleasantly, when, suddenly, Mrs. Carson sprang to her feet. +"Heavens and earth!" she cried, "this house is moving!" + +She was not mistaken. I had felt beneath my feet a sudden +sharp shock--not severe, but unmistakable. I remembered +that both houses stood upon slightly sloping ground. My blood +turned cold, my heart stood still; even Miss Carson was pale. + +When we had rushed out of doors to see what had happened, or +what was going to happen, I soon found that we had been +needlessly frightened. Some of the broken timbers on which my +house had been partially resting had given way, and the front +part of the building had slightly descended, jarring as it did so +the other house against which it rested. I endeavored to prove +to Mrs. Carson that the result was encouraging rather than +otherwise, for my house was now more firmly settled than it had +been. But she did not value the opinion of a man who did not +know enough to put his house in a place where it would be likely +to stay, and she could eat no more breakfast, and was even afraid +to stay under her own roof until experienced mechanics had been +summoned to look into the state of affairs. + +I hurried away to the town, and it was not long before +several carpenters and masons were on the spot. After a thorough +examination, they assured Mrs. Carson that there was no danger, +that my house would do no farther damage to her premises, but, to +make things certain, they would bring some heavy beams and brace +the front of my house against her cellar wall. When that should +be done it would be impossible for it to move any farther. + +"But I don't want it braced!" cried Mrs. Carson. "I want it +taken away. I want it out of my back yard!" + +The master carpenter was a man of imagination and expedients. +"That is quite another thing, ma'am," said he. "We'll fix this +gentleman's house so that you needn't be afraid of it, and then, +when the time comes to move it, there's several ways of doing +that. We might rig up a powerful windlass at the top of the +hill, and perhaps get a steam-engine to turn it, and we could +fasten cables to the house and haul her back to where she +belongs." + +"And can you take your oaths," cried Mrs. Carson, "that those +ropes won't break, and when that house gets half-way up the hill +it won't come sliding down ten times faster than it did, and +crash into me and mine and everything I own on earth? No, sir! +I'll have no house hauled up a hill back of me!" + +"Of course," said the carpenter, "it would be a great deal +easier to move it on this ground, which is almost level--" + +"And cut down my trees to do it! No, sir!" + +"Well, then," said he, "there is no way to do but to take it +apart and haul it off." + +"Which would make an awful time at the back of my house while +you were doing it!" exclaimed Mrs. Carson. + +I now put in a word. "There's only one thing to do that I +can see!" I exclaimed. "I will sell it to a match factory. It +is almost all wood, and it can be cut up in sections about two +inches thick, and then split into matches." + +Kitty smiled. "I should like to see them," she said, "taking +away the little sticks in wheelbarrows!" + +"There is no need of trifling on the subject," said Mrs. +Carson. "I have had a great deal to bear, and I must bear it no +longer than is necessary. I have just found out that in order to +get water out of my own well, I must go to the back porch of +a stranger. Such things cannot be endured. If my son George +were here, he would tell me what I ought to do. I shall write to +him, and see what he advises. I do not mind waiting a little +bit, now that I know that you can fix Mr. Warren's house so that +it won't move any farther." + +Thus the matter was left. My house was braced that +afternoon, and toward evening I started to go to a hotel in the +town to spend the night. + +"No, sir!" said Mrs. Carson. "Do you suppose that I am going +to stay here all night with a great empty house jammed up against +me, and everybody knowing that it is empty? It will be the same +as having thieves in my own house to have them in yours. You +have come down here in your property, and you can stay in it and +take care of it!" + +"I don't object to that in the least," I said. "My two women +are here, and I can tell them to attend to my meals. I haven't +any chimney, but I suppose they can make a fire some way or +other." + +"No, sir!" said Mrs. Carson. "I am not going to have any +strange servants on my place. I have just been able to prevail +upon my own women to go into the house, and I don't want any more +trouble. I have had enough already!" + +"But, my dear madam," said I, "you don't want me to go to the +town, and you won't allow me to have any cooking done here. What +am I to do?" + +"Well," she said, "you can eat with us. It may be two or +three days before I can hear from my son George, and in the +meantime you can lodge in your own house and I will take you to +board. That is the best way I can see of managing the +thing. But I am very sure I am not going to be left here alone +in the dreadful predicament in which you have put me." + +We had scarcely finished supper when Jack Brandiger came to +see me. He laughed a good deal a about my sudden change of base, +but thought, on the whole, my house had made a very successful +move. It must be more pleasant in the valley than up on that +windy hill. Jack was very much interested in everything, and +when Mrs. Carson and her daughter appeared, as we were walking +about viewing the scene, I felt myself obliged to introduce him. + +"I like those ladies," said he to me, afterwards. "I think +you have chosen very agreeable neighbors." + +"How do you know you like them?" said I. "You had scarcely +anything to say to Mrs. Carson." + +"No, to be sure," said he. "But I expect I should like her. +By the way, do you know how you used to talk to me about coming +and living somewhere near you? How would you like me to take one +of your rooms now? I might cheer you up." + +"No," said I, firmly. "That cannot be done. As things are +now, I have as much as I can do to get along here by myself." + +Mrs. Carson did not hear from her son for nearly a week, and +then he wrote that he found it almost impossible to give her any +advice. He thought it was a very queer state of affairs. He had +never heard of anything like it. But he would try and arrange +his business so that he could come home in a week or two and look +into matters. + +As I was thus compelled to force myself upon the close +neighborhood of Mrs. Carson and her daughter, I endeavored +to make things as pleasant as possible. I brought some of my men +down out of the vineyard, and set them to repairing fences, +putting the garden in order, and doing all that I could to remedy +the doleful condition of things which I had unwillingly brought +into the back yard of this quiet family. I rigged up a pump on +my back porch by which the water of the well could be +conveniently obtained, and in every way endeavored to repair +damages. + +But Mrs. Carson never ceased to talk about the unparalleled +disaster which had come upon her, and she must have had a great +deal of correspondence with her son George, because she gave me +frequent messages from him. He could not come on to look into +the state of affairs, but he seemed to be giving it a great deal +of thought and attention. + +Spring weather had come again, and it was very pleasant to +help the Carson ladies get their flower-garden in order--at +least, as much as was left of it, for my house was resting upon +some of the most important beds. As I was obliged to give up all +present idea of doing anything in the way of getting my residence +out of a place where it had no business to be, because Mrs. +Carson would not consent to any plan which had been suggested, I +felt that I was offering some little compensation in beautifying +what seemed to be, at that time, my own grounds. + +My labors in regard to vines, bushes, and all that sort of +thing were generally carried on under direction of Mrs. Carson or +her daughter, and as the elderly lady was a very busy housewife, +the horticultural work was generally left to Miss Kitty and me. + +I liked Miss Kitty. She was a cheerful, whole-souled person, and +I sometimes thought that she was not so unwilling to have me for +a neighbor as the rest of the family seemed to be; for if I were +to judge the disposition of her brother George from what her +mother told me about his letters, both he and Mrs. Carson must be +making a great many plans to get me off the premises. + +Nearly a month had now passed since my house and I made that +remarkable morning call upon Mrs. Carson. I was becoming +accustomed to my present mode of living, and, so far as I was +concerned, it satisfied me very well. I certainly lived a great +deal better than when I was depending upon my old negro cook. +Miss Kitty seemed to be satisfied with things as they were, and +so, in some respects, did her mother. But the latter never +ceased to give me extracts from some of her son George's letters, +and this was always annoying and worrying to me. Evidently he +was not pleased with me as such a close neighbor to his mother, +and it was astonishing how many expedients he proposed in order +to rid her of my undesirable proximity. + +"My son George," said Mrs. Carson, one morning, "has been +writing to me about jack-screws. He says that the greatest +improvements have been made in jack-screws." + +"What do you do with them, mother?" asked Miss Kitty. + +"You lift houses with them," said she. "He says that in +large cities they lift whole blocks of houses with them and build +stories underneath. He thinks that we can get rid of our trouble +here if we use jack-screws." + +"But how does he propose to use them?" I asked. + +"Oh, he has a good many plans," answered Mrs. Carson. "He +said that he should not wonder if jack-screws could be made large +enough to lift your house entirely over mine and set it out in +the road, where it could be carried away without interfering with +anything, except, of course, vehicles which might be coming +along. But he has another plan--that is, to lift my house up and +carry it out into the field on the other side of the road, and +then your house might be carried along right over the cellar +until it got to the road. In that way, he says, the bushes and +trees would not have to be interfered with." + +"I think brother George is cracked!" said Kitty. + +All this sort of thing worried me very much. My mind was +eminently disposed toward peace and tranquillity, but who could +be peaceful and tranquil with a prospective jack-screw under the +very base of his comfort and happiness? In fact, my house had +never been such a happy home as it was at that time. The fact of +its unwarranted position upon other people's grounds had ceased +to trouble me. + +But the coming son George, with his jack-screws, did trouble +me very much, and that afternoon I deliberately went into Mrs. +Carson's house to look for Kitty. I knew her mother was not at +home, for I had seen her go out. When Kitty appeared I asked her +to come out on her back porch. "Have you thought of any new plan +of moving it?" she said, with a smile, as we sat down. + +"No," said I, earnestly. "I have not, and I don't want to +think of any plan of moving it. I am tired of seeing it here, I +am tired of thinking about moving it away, and I am tired of +hearing people talk about moving it. I have not any right +to be here, and I am never allowed to forget it. What I want to +do is to go entirely away, and leave everything behind me--except +one thing." + +"And what is that?" asked Kitty. + +"You," I answered. + +She turned a little pale and did not reply. + +"You understand me, Kitty," I said. "There is nothing in the +world that I care for but you. What have you to say to me?" + +Then came back to her her little smile. "I think it would be +very foolish for us to go away," she said. + +It was about a quarter of an hour after this when Kitty +proposed that we should go out to the front of the house; it +would look queer if any of the servants should come by and see us +sitting together like that. I had forgotten that there were +other people in the world, but I went with her. + +We were standing on the front porch, close to each other, and +I think we were holding each other's hands, when Mrs. Carson came +back. As she approached she looked at us inquiringly, plainly +wishing to know why we were standing side by side before her door +as if we had some special object in so doing. + +"Well?" said she, as she came up the steps. Of course it was +right that I should speak, and, in as few words as possible, I +told her what Kitty and I had been saying to each other. I never +saw Kitty's mother look so cheerful and so handsome as when she +came forward and kissed her daughter and shook hands with me. +She seemed so perfectly satisfied that it amazed me. After a +little Kitty left us, and then Mrs. Carson asked me to sit by her +on a rustic bench. + +"Now," said she, "this will straighten out things in the very +best way. When you are married, you and Kitty can live in the +back building,--for, of course, your house will now be the same +thing as a back building,--and you can have the second floor. We +won't have any separate tables, because it will be a great deal +nicer for you and Kitty to live with me, and it will simply be +your paying board for two persons instead of one. And you know +you can manage your vineyard just as well from the bottom of the +hill as from the top. The lower rooms of what used to be your +house can be made very pleasant and comfortable for all of us. I +have been thinking about the room on the right that you had +planned for a parlor, and it will make a lovely sitting-room for +us, which is a thing we have never had, and the room on the other +side is just what will suit beautifully for a guest-chamber. The +two houses together, with the roof of my back porch properly +joined to the front of your house, will make a beautiful and +spacious dwelling. It was fortunate, too, that you painted your +house a light yellow. I have often looked at the two together, +and thought what a good thing it was that one was not one color +and the other another. As to the pump, it will be very easy now +to put a pipe from what used to be your back porch to our +kitchen, so that we can get water without being obliged to carry +it. Between us we can make all sorts of improvements, and some +time I will tell you of a good many that I have thought of. + +"What used to be your house, " she continued, "can be jack- +screwed up a little bit and a good foundation put under it. I +have inquired about that. Of course it would not have been +proper to let you know that I was satisfied with the state of +things, but I was satisfied, and there is no use of denying it. +As soon as I got over my first scare after that house came down +the hill, and had seen how everything might be arranged to suit +all parties, I said to myself, `What the Lord has joined +together, let not man put asunder,' and so, according to my +belief, the strongest kind of jack-screws could not put these two +houses asunder, any more than they could put you and Kitty +asunder, now that you have agreed to take each other for each +other's own." + +Jack Brandiger came to call that evening, and when he had +heard what had happened he whistled a good deal. "You are a +funny kind of a fellow," said he. "You go courting like a snail, +with your house on your back!" + +I think my friend was a little discomfited. "Don't be +discouraged, Jack," said I. "You will get a good wife some of +these days--that is, if you don't try to slide uphill to find +her!" + + + + OUR ARCHERY CLUB + +When an archery club was formed in our village, I was among the +first to join it. But I should not, on this account, claim any +extraordinary enthusiasm on the subject of archery, for nearly +all the ladies and gentlemen of the place were also among the +first to join. + +Few of us, I think, had a correct idea of the popularity of +archery in our midst until the subject of a club was broached. +Then we all perceived what a strong interest we felt in the study +and use of the bow and arrow. The club was formed immediately, +and our thirty members began to discuss the relative merits of +lancewood, yew, and greenheart bows, and to survey yards and +lawns for suitable spots for setting up targets for home +practice. + +Our weekly meetings, at which we came together to show in +friendly contest how much our home practice had taught us, were +held upon the village green, or rather upon what had been +intended to be the village green. This pretty piece of ground, +partly in smooth lawn and partly shaded by fine trees, was the +property of a gentleman of the place, who had presented it, under +certain conditions, to the township. But as the township had +never fulfilled any of the conditions, and had done nothing +toward the improvement of the spot, further than to make it a +grazing-place for local cows and goats, the owner had withdrawn +his gift, shut out the cows and goats by a picket fence, and, +having locked the gate, had hung up the key in his barn. When +our club was formed, the green, as it was still called, was +offered to us for our meetings, and, with proper gratitude, we +elected its owner to be our president. + +This gentleman was eminently qualified for the presidency of +an archery club. In the first place, he did not shoot: this gave +him time and opportunity to attend to the shooting of others. He +was a tall and pleasant man, a little elderly. This +"elderliness," if I may so put it, seemed, in his case, to +resemble some mild disorder, like a gentle rheumatism, which, +while it prevented him from indulging in all the wild hilarities +of youth, gave him, in compensation, a position, as one entitled +to a certain consideration, which was very agreeable to him. His +little disease was chronic, it is true, and it was growing upon +him; but it was, so far, a pleasant ailment. + +And so, with as much interest in bows and arrows and targets +and successful shots as any of us, he never fitted an arrow to a +string, nor drew a bow. But he attended every meeting, settling +disputed points (for he studied all the books on archery), +encouraging the disheartened, holding back the eager ones who +would run to the targets as soon as they had shot, regardless of +the fact that others were still shooting and that the human body +is not arrow-proof, and shedding about him that general aid and +comfort which emanates from a good fellow, no matter what he may +say or do. + +There were persons--outsiders--who said that archery clubs +always selected ladies for their presiding officers, but we did +not care to be too much bound down and trammelled by customs and +traditions. Another club might not have among its members such a +genial elderly gentleman who owned a village green. + +I soon found myself greatly interested in archery, especially +when I succeeded in planting an arrow somewhere within the +periphery of the target, but I never became such an enthusiast in +bow-shooting as my friend Pepton. + +If Pepton could have arranged matters to suit himself, he +would have been born an archer. But as this did not happen to +have been the case, he employed every means in his power to +rectify what he considered this serious error in his +construction. He gave his whole soul, and the greater part of +his spare time, to archery, and as he was a young man of energy, +this helped him along wonderfully. + +His equipments were perfect. No one could excel him in, this +respect. His bow was snakewood, backed with hickory. He +carefully rubbed it down every evening with oil and beeswax, and +it took its repose in a green baize bag. His arrows were Philip +Highfield's best, his strings the finest Flanders hemp. He had +shooting-gloves, and little leather tips that could be screwed +fast on the ends of what he called his string-fingers. He had a +quiver and a belt, and when equipped for the weekly meetings, he +carried a fancy-colored wiping-tassel, and a little ebony grease- +pot hanging from his belt. He wore, when shooting, a polished +arm-guard or bracer, and if he had heard of anything else that an +archer should have, he straightway would have procured it. + +Pepton was a single man, and he lived with two good old +maiden ladies, who took as much care of him as if they had been +his mothers. And he was such a good, kind fellow that he +deserved all the attention they gave him. They felt a great +interest in his archery pursuits, and shared his anxious +solicitude in the selection of a suitable place to hang his bow. + +"You see," said he, "a fine bow like this, when not in use, +should always be in a perfectly dry place." + +"And when in use, too," said Miss Martha, "for I am sure that +you oughtn't to be standing and shooting in any damp spot. +There's no surer way of gettin' chilled." + +To which sentiment Miss Maria agreed, and suggested wearing +rubber shoes, or having a board to stand on, when the club met +after a rain. + +Pepton first hung his bow in the hall, but after he had +arranged it symmetrically upon two long nails (bound with green +worsted, lest they should scratch the bow through its woollen +cover), he reflected that the front door would frequently be +open, and that damp drafts must often go through the hall. He +was sorry to give up this place for his bow, for it was +convenient and appropriate, and for an instant he thought that it +might remain, if the front door could be kept shut, and visitors +admitted through a little side door which the family generally +used, and which was almost as convenient as the other--except, +indeed, on wash-days, when a wet sheet or some article of wearing +apparel was apt to be hung in front of it. But although wash-day +occurred but once a week, and although it was comparatively +easy, after a little practice, to bob under a high-propped sheet, +Pepton's heart was too kind to allow his mind to dwell upon this +plan. So he drew the nails from the wall of the hall, and put +them up in various places about the house. His own room had to +be aired a great deal in all weathers, and so that would not do +at all. The wall above the kitchen fireplace would be a good +location, for the chimney was nearly always warm. But Pepton +could not bring himself to keep his bow in the kitchen. There +would be nothing esthetic about such a disposition of it, and, +besides, the girl might be tempted to string and bend it. The +old ladies really did not want it in the parlor, for its length +and its green baize cover would make it an encroaching and +unbecoming neighbor to the little engravings and the big +samplers, the picture-frames of acorns and pine-cones, the +fancifully patterned ornaments of clean wheat straw, and all the +quaint adornments which had hung upon those walls for so many +years. But they did not say so. If it had been necessary, to +make room for the bow, they would have taken down the pencilled +profiles of their grandfather, their grandmother, and their +father when a little boy, which hung in a row over the +mantelpiece. + +However, Pepton did not ask this sacrifice. In the summer +evenings the parlor windows must be open. The dining-room was +really very little used in the evening, except when Miss Maria +had stockings to darn, and then she always sat in that apartment, +and of course she had the windows open. But Miss Maria was very +willing to bring her work into the parlor,--it was foolish, +anyway, to have a feeling about darning stockings before +chance company,--and then the dining-room could be kept shut up +after tea. So into the wall of that neat little room Pepton +drove his worsted-covered nails, and on them carefully laid his +bow. All the next day Miss Martha and Miss Maria went about the +house, covering the nail-holes he had made with bits of wall- +paper, carefully snipped out to fit the patterns, and pasted on +so neatly that no one would have suspected they were there. + +One afternoon, as I was passing the old ladies' house, saw, +or thought I saw, two men carrying in a coffin. I was struck +with alarm. + +"What!" I thought. "Can either of those good women-- Or can +Pepton--" + +Without a moment's hesitation, I rushed in behind the men. +There, at the foot of the stairs, directing them, stood Pepton. +Then it was not he! I seized him sympathetically by the hand. + +"Which?" I faltered. "Which? Who is that coffin for?" + +"Coffin!" cried Pepton. "Why, my dear fellow, that is not a +coffin. That is my ascham." + +"Ascham?" I exclaimed. "What is that?" + +"Come and look at it," he said, when the men had set it on +end against the wall. "It is an upright closet or receptacle for +an archer's armament. Here is a place to stand the bow, here are +supports for the arrows and quivers, here are shelves and hooks, +on which to lay or hang everything the merry man can need. You +see, moreover, that it is lined with green plush, that the door +fits tightly, so that it can stand anywhere, and there need be no +fear of drafts or dampness affecting my bow. Isn't it a +perfect thing? You ought to get one." + +I admitted the perfection, but agreed no further. I had not +the income of my good Pepton. + +Pepton was, indeed, most wonderfully well equipped; and yet, +little did those dear old ladies think, when they carefully +dusted and reverentially gazed at the bunches of arrows, the arm- +bracers, the gloves, the grease-pots, and all the rest of the +paraphernalia of archery, as it hung around Pepton's room, or +when they afterwards allowed a particular friend to peep at it, +all arranged so orderly within the ascham, or when they looked +with sympathetic, loving admiration on the beautiful polished +bow, when it was taken out of its bag--little did they think, I +say, that Pepton was the very poorest shot in the club. In all +the surface of the much-perforated targets of the club, there was +scarcely a hole that he could put his hand upon his heart and say +he made. + +Indeed, I think it was the truth that Pepton was born not to +be an archer. There were young fellows in the club who shot with +bows that cost no more than Pepton's tassels, but who could stand +up and whang arrows into the targets all the afternoon, if they +could get a chance; and there were ladies who made hits five +times out of six; and there were also all the grades of archers +common to any club. But there was no one but himself in Pepton's +grade. He stood alone, and it was never any trouble to add up +his score. + +Yet he was not discouraged. He practised every day except +Sundays, and indeed he was the only person in the club who +practised at night. When he told me about this, I was a little +surprised. + +"Why, it's easy enough," said he. "You see, I hung a +lantern, with a reflector, before the target, just a little to +one side. It lighted up the target beautifully, and I believe +there was a better chance of hitting it than by daylight, for the +only thing you could see was the target, and so your attention +was not distracted. To be sure," he said, in answer to a +question, "it was a good deal of trouble to find the arrows, but +that I always have. When I get so expert that I can put all the +arrows into the target, there will be no trouble of the kind, +night or day. However," he continued, "I don't practise any more +by night. The other evening I sent an arrow slam-bang into the +lantern, and broke it all to flinders. Borrowed lantern, too. +Besides, I found it made Miss Martha very nervous to have me +shooting about the house after dark. She had a friend who had a +little boy who was hit in the leg by an arrow from a bow, which, +she says, accidentally went off in the night, of its own accord. +She is certainly a little mixed in her mind in regard to this +matter, but I wish to respect her feelings, and so shall not use +another lantern." + +As I have said, there were many good archers among the ladies +of our club. Some of them, after we had been organized for a +month or two, made scores that few of the gentlemen could excel. +But the lady who attracted the greatest attention when she shot +was Miss Rosa. + +When this very pretty young lady stood up before the ladies' +target--her left side well advanced, her bow firmly held out in +her strong left arm, which never quivered, her head a little +bent to the right, her arrow drawn back by three well-gloved +fingers to the tip of her little ear, her dark eyes steadily +fixed upon the gold, and her dress, well fitted over her fine and +vigorous figure, falling in graceful folds about her feet, we all +stopped shooting to look at her. + +"There is something statuesque about her," said Pepton, who +ardently admired her, "and yet there isn't. A statue could never +equal her unless we knew there was a probability of movement in +it. And the only statues which have that are the Jarley wax- +works, which she does not resemble in the least. There is only +one thing that that girl needs to make her a perfect archer, and +that is to be able to aim better." + +This was true. Miss Rosa did need to aim better. Her arrows +had a curious habit of going on all sides of the target, and it +was very seldom that one chanced to stick into it. For if she +did make a hit, we all knew it was chance and that there was no +probability of her doing it again. Once she put an arrow right +into the centre of the gold,--one of the finest shots ever made +on the ground,--but she didn't hit the target again for two +weeks. She was almost as bad a shot as Pepton, and that is +saying a good deal. + +One evening I was sitting with Pepton on the little front +porch of the old ladies' house, where we were taking our after- +dinner smoke while Miss Martha and Miss Maria were washing, with +their own white hands, the china and glass in which they took so +much pride. I often used to go over and spend an hour with +Pepton. He liked to have some one to whom he could talk on the +subjects which filled his soul, and I liked to hear him talk. + +"I tell you," said he, as he leaned back in his chair, with +his feet carefully disposed on the railing so that they would not +injure Miss Maria's Madeira-vine, "I tell you, sir, that there +are two things I crave with all my power of craving--two goals I +fain would reach, two diadems I would wear upon my brow. One of +these is to kill an eagle--or some large bird--with a shaft from +my good bow. I would then have it stuffed and mounted, with the +very arrow that killed it still sticking in its breast. This +trophy of my skill I would have fastened against the wall of my +room or my hall, and I would feel proud to think that my +grandchildren could point to that bird--which I would carefully +bequeath to my descendants--and say, `My grand'ther shot that +bird, and with that very arrow.' Would it not stir your pulses +if you could do a thing like that?" + +"I should have to stir them up a good deal before I could do +it," I replied. "It would be a hard thing to shoot an eagle with +an arrow. If you want a stuffed bird to bequeath, you'd better +use a rifle." + +"A rifle!" exclaimed Pepton. "There would be no glory in +that. There are lots of birds shot with rifles--eagles, hawks, +wild geese, tomtits--" + +"Oh, no!" I interrupted, "not tomtits." + +"Well, perhaps they are too little for a rifle," said he. "But +what I mean to say is that I wouldn't care at all for an eagle I +had shot with a rifle. You couldn't show the ball that killed +him. If it were put in properly, it would be inside, where it +couldn't be seen. No, sir. It is ever so much more honorable, +and far more difficult, too, to hit an eagle than to hit a +target." + +"That is very true," I answered, "especially in these days, when +there are so few eagles and so many targets. But what is your +other diadem?" + +"That," said Pepton, "is to see Miss Rosa wear the badge." + +"Indeed!" said I. And from that moment I began to understand +Pepton's hopes in regard to the grandmother of those children who +should point to the eagle. + +"Yes, sir," he continued, "I should be truly happy to see her +win the badge. And she ought to win it. No one shoots more +correctly, and with a better understanding of all the rules, than +she does. There must truly be something the matter with her +aiming. I've half a mind to coach her a little." + +I turned aside to see who was coming down the road. I would +not have had him know I smiled. + +The most objectionable person in our club was O. J. +Hollingsworth. He was a good enough fellow in himself, but it +was as an archer that we objected to him. + +There was, so far as I know, scarcely a rule of archery that +he did not habitually violate. Our president and nearly all of +us remonstrated with him, and Pepton even went to see him on the +subject, but it was all to no purpose. With a quiet disregard of +other people's ideas about bow-shooting and other people's +opinions about himself, he persevered in a style of shooting +which appeared absolutely absurd to any one who knew anything of +the rules and methods of archery. + +I used to like to look at him when his turn came around to +shoot. He was not such a pleasing object of vision as Miss Rosa, +but his style was so entirely novel to me that it was +interesting. He held the bow horizontally, instead of +perpendicularly, like other archers, and he held it well +down--about opposite his waistband. He did not draw his arrow +back to his ear, but he drew it back to the lower button of his +vest. Instead of standing upright, with his left side to the +target, he faced it full, and leaned forward over his arrow, in +an attitude which reminded me of a Roman soldier about to fall +upon his sword. When he had seized the nock of his arrow between +his finger and thumb, he languidly glanced at the target, raised +his bow a little, and let fly. The provoking thing about it was +that he nearly always hit. If he had only known how to stand, +and hold his bow, and draw back his arrow, he would have been a +very good archer. But, as it was, we could not help laughing at +him, although our president always discountenanced anything of +the kind. + +Our champion was a tall man, very cool and steady, who went +to work at archery exactly as if he were paid a salary, and +intended to earn his money honestly. He did the best he could in +every way. He generally shot with one of the bows owned by the +club, but if any one on the ground had a better one, he would +borrow it. He used to shoot sometimes with Pepton's bow, which +he declared to be a most capital one. But as Pepton was always +very nervous when he saw his bow in the hands of another than +himself, the champion soon ceased to borrow it. + +There were two badges, one of green silk and gold for the +ladies, and one of green and red for the gentlemen, and these +were shot for at each weekly meeting. With the exception of a +few times when the club was first formed, the champion had always +worn the gentlemen's badge. Many of us tried hard to win it +from him, but we never could succeed; he shot too well. + +On the morning of one of our meeting days, the champion told +me, as I was going to the city with him, that he would not be +able to return at his usual hour that afternoon. He would be +very busy, and would have to wait for the six-fifteen train, +which would bring him home too late for the archery meeting. So +he gave me the badge, asking me to hand it to the president, that +he might bestow it on the successful competitor that afternoon. + +We were all rather glad that the champion was obliged to be +absent. Here was a chance for some one of us to win the badge. +It was not, indeed, an opportunity for us to win a great deal of +honor, for if the champion were to be there we should have no +chance at all. But we were satisfied with this much, having no +reason--in the present, at least--to expect anything more. + +So we went to the targets with a new zeal, and most of us +shot better than we had ever shot before. In this number was O. +J. Hollingsworth. He excelled himself, and, what was worse, he +excelled all the rest of us. He actually made a score of eighty- +five in twenty-four shots, which at that time was remarkably good +shooting, for our club. This was dreadful! To have a fellow who +didn't know how to shoot beat us all was too bad. If any visitor +who knew anything at all of archery should see that the member +who wore the champion's badge was a man who held his bow as if he +had the stomach-ache, it would ruin our character as a club. It +was not to be borne. + +Pepton in particular felt greatly outraged. We had met +very promptly that afternoon, and had finished our regular +shooting much earlier than usual; and now a knot of us were +gathered together, talking over this unfortunate occurrence. + +"I don't intend to stand it," Pepton suddenly exclaimed. "I +feel it as a personal disgrace. I'm going to have the champion +here before dark. By the rules, he has a right to shoot until +the president declares it is too late. Some of you fellows stay +here, and I'll bring him." + +And away he ran, first giving me charge of his precious bow. +There was no need of his asking us to stay. We were bound to see +the fun out, and to fill up the time our president offered a +special prize of a handsome bouquet from his gardens, to be shot +for by the ladies. + +Pepton ran to the railroad station, and telegraphed to the +champion. This was his message: + + +"You are absolutely needed here. If possible, take the five- +thirty train for Ackford. I will drive over for you. Answer." + + +There was no train before the six-fifteen by which the +champion could come directly to our village; but Ackford, a small +town about three miles distant, was on another railroad, on which +there were frequent afternoon trains. + +The champion answered: + + +"All right. Meet me." + + +Then Pepton rushed to our livery stable, hired a horse and +buggy, and drove to Ackford. + +A little after half-past six, when several of us were +beginning to think that Pepton had failed in his plans, he +drove rapidly into the grounds, making a very short turn at the +gate, and pulled up his panting horse just in time to avoid +running over three ladies, who were seated on the grass. The +champion was by his side! + +The latter lost no time in talking or salutations. He knew +what he had been brought there to do, and he immediately set +about trying to do it. He took Pepton's bow, which the latter +urged upon him. He stood up, straight and firm on the line, at +thirty-five yards from the gentlemen's target; he carefully +selected his arrows, examining the feathers and wiping away any +bit of soil that might be adhering to the points after some one +had shot them into the turf; with vigorous arm he drew each arrow +to its head; he fixed his eyes and his whole mind on the centre +of the target; he shot his twenty-four arrows, handed to him, one +by one, by Pepton, and he made a score of ninety-one. + +The whole club had been scoring the shots, as they were made, +and when the last arrow plumped into the red ring, a cheer arose +from every member excepting three: the champion, the president, +and O. J. Hollingsworth. But Pepton cheered loudly enough to +make up these deficiencies. + +"What in the mischief did they cheer him for?" asked +Hollingsworth of me. "They didn't cheer me when I beat everybody +on the grounds an hour ago. And it's no new thing for him to win +the badge; he does it every time." + +"Well," said I, frankly, "I think the club, AS a club, objects to +your wearing the badge, because you don't know how to shoot." + +"Don't know how to shoot!" he cried. "Why, I can hit the +target better than any of you. Isn't that what you try to do +when you shoot?" + +"Yes," said I, "of course that is what we try to do. But we +try to do it in the proper way." + +"Proper grandmother!" he exclaimed. "It doesn't seem to help +you much. The best thing you fellows can do is to learn to shoot +my way, and then perhaps you may be able to hit oftener." + +When the champion had finished shooting he went home to his +dinner, but many of us stood about, talking over our great +escape. + +"I feel as if I had done that myself," said Pepton. "I am +almost as proud as if I had shot--well, not an eagle, but a +soaring lark." + +"Why, that ought to make you prouder than the other," said I, +"for a lark, especially when it's soaring, must be a good deal +harder to hit than an eagle." + +"That's so," said Pepton, reflectively. "But I'll stick to +the lark. I'm proud." + +During the next month our style of archery improved very much, so +much, indeed, that we increased our distance, for gentlemen, to +forty yards, and that for ladies to thirty, and also had serious +thoughts of challenging the Ackford club to a match. But as this +was generally understood to be a crack club, we finally +determined to defer our challenge until the next season. + +When I say we improved, I do not mean all of us. I do not mean +Miss Rosa. Although her attitudes were as fine as ever, and +every motion as true to rule as ever, she seldom made a hit. +Pepton actually did try to teach her how to aim, but the various +methods of pointing the arrow which he suggested resulted in +such wild shooting that the boys who picked up the arrows never +dared to stick the points of their noses beyond their boarded +barricade during Miss Rosa's turns at the target. But she was +not discouraged, and Pepton often assured her that if she would +keep up a good heart, and practise regularly, she would get the +badge yet. As a rule, Pepton was so honest and truthful that a +little statement of this kind, especially under the +circumstances, might be forgiven him. + +One day Pepton came to me and announced that he had made a +discovery. + +"It's about archery," he said, "and I don't mind telling you, +because I know you will not go about telling everybody else, and +also because I want to see you succeed as an archer." + + "I am very much obliged," I said, "and what is the discovery?" + +"It's this," he answered. "When you draw your bow, bring the +nock of your arrow"--he was always very particular about +technical terms--"well up to your ear. Having done that, don't +bother any more about your right hand. It has nothing to do with +the correct pointing of your arrow, for it must be kept close to +your right ear, just as if it were screwed there. Then with your +left hand bring around the bow so that your fist--with the arrow- +head, which is resting on top of it--shall point, as nearly as +you can make it, directly at the centre of the target. Then let +fly, and ten to one you'll make a hit. Now, what do you think of +that for a discovery? I've thoroughly tested the plan, and it +works splendidly." + +"I think," said I, "that you have discovered the way in +which good archers shoot. You have stated the correct method of +managing a bow and arrow." + +"Then you don't think it's an original method with me?" + +"Certainly not," I answered. + +"But it's the correct way?" + +"There's no doubt of that," said I. + +"Well," said Pepton, "then I shall make it my way." + +He did so, and the consequence was that one day, when the +champion happened to be away, Pepton won the badge. When the +result was announced, we were all surprised, but none so much so +as Pepton himself. He had been steadily improving since he had +adopted a good style of shooting, but he had had no idea that +he would that day be able to win the badge. + +When our president pinned the emblem of success upon the +lapel of his coat, Pepton turned pale, and then he flushed. He +thanked the president, and was about to thank the ladies and +gentlemen; but probably recollecting that we had had nothing to +do with it,--unless, indeed, we had shot badly on his behalf,--he +refrained. He said little, but I could see that he was very +proud and very happy. There was but one drawback to his triumph: + +Miss Rosa was not there. She was a very regular attendant, but +for some reason she was absent on this momentous afternoon. I +did not say anything to him on the subject, but I knew he felt +this absence deeply. + +But this cloud could not wholly overshadow his happiness. He +walked home alone, his face beaming, his eyes sparkling, and his +good bow under his arm. + +That evening I called on him, for I thought that when he had +cooled down a little he would like to talk over the affair. +But he was not in. Miss Maria said that he had gone out as soon +as he had finished his dinner, which he had hurried through in a +way which would certainly injure his digestion if he kept up the +practice; and dinner was late, too, for they waited for him, and +the archery meeting lasted a long time today; and it really was +not right for him to stay out after the dew began to fall with +only ordinary shoes on, for what's the good of knowing how to +shoot a bow and arrow, if you're laid up in your bed with +rheumatism or disease of the lungs? Good old lady! She would +have kept Pepton in a green baize bag, had such a thing been +possible. + +The next morning, full two hours before church-time, Pepton +called on me. His face was still beaming. I could not help +smiling. + +"Your happiness lasts well," I said. + +"Lasts!" he exclaimed. "Why shouldn't it last!" + +"There's no reason why it should not--at least, for a week," +I said, "and even longer, if you repeat your success." + +I did not feel so much like congratulating Pepton as I had on +the previous evening. I thought he was making too much of his +badge-winning. + +"Look here!" said Pepton, seating himself, and drawing his +chair close to me, "you are shooting wild--very wild indeed. You +don't even see the target. Let me tell you something. Last +evening I went to see Miss Rosa. She was delighted at my +success. I had not expected this. I thought she would be +pleased, but not to such a degree. Her congratulations were so +warm that they set me on fire." + +"They must have been very warm indeed," I remarked. + +"`Miss Rosa,' said I," continued Pepton, without regarding my +interruption, "`it has been my fondest hope to see you wear the +badge.' `But I never could get it, you know,' she said. `You +have got it,' I exclaimed. `Take this. I won it for you. Make +me happy by wearing it.' `I can't do that,' she said. `That is +a gentleman's badge.' `Take it,' I cried, `gentleman and all!' + + "I can't tell you all that happened after that," continued +Pepton. "You know, it wouldn't do. It is enough to say that she +wears the badge. And we are both her own--the badge and I!" + +Now I congratulated him in good earnest. There was a reason +for it. + +"I don't owe a snap now for shooting an eagle," said Pepton, +springing to his feet and striding up and down the floor. "Let +'em all fly free for me. I have made the most glorious shot that +man could make. I have hit the gold--hit it fair in the very +centre! And what's more, I've knocked it clean out of the +target! Nobody else can ever make such a shot. The rest of you +fellows will have to be content to hit the red, the blue, the +black, or the white. The gold is mine!" + +I called on the old ladies, some time after this, and found +them alone. They were generally alone in the evenings now. We +talked about Pepton's engagement, and I found them resigned. +They were sorry to lose him, but they wanted him to be happy. + +"We have always known," said Miss Martha, with a little sigh, +"that we must die, and that he must get married. But we don't +intend to repine. These things will come to people." And her +little sigh was followed by a smile, still smaller. + + + + + +The Project Gutenberg Etext of The Magic Egg and Other Stories +by Frank Stockton, author of "The Lady or the Tiger" + diff --git a/old/mgegg10.zip b/old/mgegg10.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..b518168 --- /dev/null +++ b/old/mgegg10.zip |