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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d7b82bc --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,4 @@ +*.txt text eol=lf +*.htm text eol=lf +*.html text eol=lf +*.md text eol=lf diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..271bca9 --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #50796 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/50796) diff --git a/old/50796-h.zip b/old/50796-h.zip Binary files differdeleted file mode 100644 index cd92834..0000000 --- a/old/50796-h.zip +++ /dev/null diff --git a/old/50796-h/50796-h.htm b/old/50796-h/50796-h.htm deleted file mode 100644 index a07d9b7..0000000 --- a/old/50796-h/50796-h.htm +++ /dev/null @@ -1,1299 +0,0 @@ -<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" - "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> -<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> - <head> - <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=us-ascii" /> - <meta http-equiv="Content-Style-Type" content="text/css" /> - <title> - The Project Gutenberg eBook of Shipping Clerk, by William Morrison. - </title> - - <link rel="coverpage" href="images/cover.jpg" /> - - <style type="text/css"> - -body { - margin-left: 10%; - margin-right: 10%; -} - - h1,h2 { - text-align: center; /* all headings centered */ - clear: both; -} - -p { - margin-top: .51em; - text-align: justify; - margin-bottom: .49em; -} - -hr { - width: 33%; - margin-top: 2em; - margin-bottom: 2em; - margin-left: 33.5%; - margin-right: 33.5%; - clear: both; -} - -hr.chap {width: 65%; margin-left: 17.5%; margin-right: 17.5%;} -hr.tb {width: 45%; margin-left: 27.5%; margin-right: 27.5%;} - -.center {text-align: center;} - -.right {text-align: right;} - -.caption {font-weight: bold;} - -/* Images */ -.figcenter { - margin: auto; - text-align: center; -} - -div.titlepage { - text-align: center; - page-break-before: always; - page-break-after: always; -} - -div.titlepage p { - text-align: center; - text-indent: 0em; - font-weight: bold; - line-height: 1.5; - margin-top: 3em; -} - -.ph1, .ph2, .ph3, .ph4 { text-align: center; text-indent: 0em; font-weight: bold; } -.ph1 { font-size: xx-large; margin: .67em auto; } -.ph2 { font-size: x-large; margin: .75em auto; } -.ph3 { font-size: large; margin: .83em auto; } -.ph4 { font-size: medium; margin: 1.12em auto; } - - - </style> - </head> -<body> - - -<pre> - -The Project Gutenberg EBook of Shipping Clerk, by William Morrison - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most -other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - - - -Title: Shipping Clerk - -Author: William Morrison - -Release Date: December 30, 2015 [EBook #50796] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ASCII - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SHIPPING CLERK *** - - - - -Produced by Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net - - - - - - -</pre> - - -<div class="figcenter"> - <img src="images/cover.jpg" width="362" height="500" alt=""/> -</div> - -<hr class="chap" /> - -<div class="titlepage"> - -<h1>Shipping Clerk</h1> - -<p>By WILLIAM MORRISON</p> - -<p>[Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from<br /> -Galaxy Science Fiction June 1952.<br /> -Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that<br /> -the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]</p> - -</div> - -<hr class="chap" /> - -<p class="ph3"><i>If Ollie knew the work he was doing, he would<br /> -have resigned—if resigning were possible!</i></p> - -<hr class="chap" /> - -<p>If there had ever been a time when Ollie Keith hadn't been hungry, it -was so far in the past that he couldn't remember it. He was hungry now -as he walked through the alley, his eyes shifting lusterlessly from one -heap of rubbish to the next. He was hungry through and through, all -one hundred and forty pounds of him, the flesh distributed so gauntly -over his tall frame that in spots it seemed about to wear through, as -his clothes had. That it hadn't done so in forty-two years sometimes -struck Ollie as in the nature of a miracle.</p> - -<p>He worked for a junk collector and he was unsuccessful in his present -job, as he had been at everything else. Ollie had followed the first -part of the rags-to-riches formula with classic exactness. He had been -born to rags, and then, as if that hadn't been enough, his parents had -died, and he had been left an orphan. He should have gone to the big -city, found a job in the rich merchant's counting house, and saved the -pretty daughter, acquiring her and her fortune in the process.</p> - -<p>It hadn't worked out that way. In the orphanage where he had spent so -many unhappy years, both his food and his education had been skimped. -He had later been hired out to a farmer, but he hadn't been strong -enough for farm labor, and he had been sent back.</p> - -<p>His life since then had followed an unhappy pattern. Lacking strength -and skill, he had been unable to find and hold a good job. Without a -good job, he had been unable to pay for the food and medical care, and -for the training he would have needed to acquire strength and skill. -Once, in the search for food and training, he had offered himself to -the Army, but the doctors who examined him had quickly turned thumbs -down, and the Army had rejected him with contempt. They wanted better -human material than that.</p> - -<p>How he had managed to survive at all to the present was another -miracle. By this time, of course, he knew, as the radio comic put it, -that he wasn't long for this world. And to make the passage to another -world even easier, he had taken to drink. Rot gut stilled the pangs of -hunger even more effectively than inadequate food did. And it gave -him the first moments of happiness, spurious though they were, that he -could remember.</p> - -<p>Now, as he sought through the heaps of rubbish for usable rags or -redeemable milk bottles, his eyes lighted on something unexpected. -Right at the edge of the curb lay a small nut, species indeterminate. -If he had his usual luck, it would turn out to be withered inside, but -at least he could hope for the best.</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>He picked up the nut, banged it futilely against the ground, and then -looked around for a rock with which to crack it. None was in sight. -Rather fearfully, he put it in his mouth and tried to crack it between -his teeth. His teeth were in as poor condition as the rest of him, and -the chances were that they would crack before the nut did.</p> - -<p>The nut slipped and Ollie gurgled, threw his hands into the air and -almost choked. Then he got it out of his windpipe and, a second later, -breathed easily. The nut was in his stomach, still uncracked. And -Ollie, it seemed to him, was hungrier than ever.</p> - -<p>The alley was a failure. His life had been a progression from rags to -rags, and these last rags were inferior to the first. There were no -milk bottles, there was no junk worth salvaging.</p> - -<p>At the end of the alley was a barber shop, and here Ollie had a great -and unexpected stroke of luck. He found a bottle. The bottle was no -container for milk and it wasn't empty. It was standing on a small -table near an open window in the rear of the barber shop. Ollie found -that he could get it by simply stretching out his long, gaunt arm for -it, without climbing in through the window at all.</p> - -<p>He took a long swig, and then another. The liquor tasted far better -than anything he had ever bought.</p> - -<p>When he returned the bottle to its place, it was empty.</p> - -<p>Strangely enough, despite its excellent quality, or perhaps, he -thought, <i>because</i> of it, the whiskey failed to have its usual effect -on him. It left him completely sober and clear-eyed, but hungrier than -ever.</p> - -<p>In his desperation, Ollie did something that he seldom dared to do. He -went into a restaurant, not too good a restaurant or he would never -have been allowed to take a seat, and ordered a meal he couldn't pay -for.</p> - -<p>He knew what would happen, of course, after he had eaten. He would -put on an act about having lost his money, but that wouldn't fool the -manager for more than one second. If the man was feeling good and -needed help, he'd let Ollie work the price out washing dishes. If he -was a little grumpy and had all the dishwashers he needed, he'd have -them boot the tar out of Ollie and then turn him over to the police.</p> - -<p>The soup was thick and tasty, although tasty in a way that no gourmet -would have appreciated. The mess was food, however, and Ollie gulped it -down gratefully. But it did nothing to satisfy his hunger. Likewise, -the stew had every possible leftover thrown into it, and none of it -gave Ollie any feeling of satisfaction. Even the dessert and the muddy -coffee left him as empty as before.</p> - -<p>The waiter had been in the back room with the cook. Now Ollie saw him -signal to the manager, and watched the manager hasten back. He closed -his eyes. They were onto him; there was no doubt about it. For a -moment he considered trying to get out of the front door before they -closed in, but there was another waiter present, keeping an eye on the -patrons, and he knew that he would never make it. He took a deep breath -and waited for the roof to fall in on him.</p> - -<p>He heard the manager's foot-steps and opened his eyes. The manager -said, "Uh—look, bud, about that meal you ate—"</p> - -<p>"Not bad," observed Ollie brightly.</p> - -<p>"Glad you liked it."</p> - -<p>He noticed little beads of sweat on the manager's forehead, and -wondered what had put them there. He said, "Only trouble is, it ain't -fillin'. I'm just as hungry as I was before."</p> - -<p>"It didn't fill you up, huh? That's too bad. I'll tell you what I'll -do. Rather than see you go away dissatisfied, I won't charge you for -the meal. Not a cent."</p> - -<p>Ollie blinked. This made no sense whatever. All the same, if not for -the gnawing in his stomach, he would have picked himself up and run. As -it was, he said, "Thanks. Guess in that case I'll have another order of -stew. Maybe this time it'll stick to my ribs."</p> - -<p>"Not the stew," replied the manager nervously. "You had the last that -was left. Try the roast beef."</p> - -<p>"Hmm, that's more than I was gonna spend."</p> - -<p>"No charge," said the manager. "For you, no charge at all."</p> - -<p>"Then gimme a double order. I feel starved."</p> - -<p>The double order went down the hatch, yet Ollie felt just as empty as -ever. But he was afraid to press his luck too far, and after he had -downed one more dessert—also without charge—he reluctantly picked -himself up and walked out. He was too hungry to spend any more time -wondering why he had got a free meal.</p> - -<p>In the back room of the restaurant, the manager sank weakly into a -chair. "I was afraid he was going to insist on paying for it. Then we'd -really have been on a spot."</p> - -<p>"Guess he was too glad to get it for free," the cook said.</p> - -<p>"Well, if anything happens to him now, it'll happen away from here."</p> - -<p>"Suppose they take a look at what's in his stomach."</p> - -<p>"He still won't be able to sue us. What did you do with the rest of -that stew?"</p> - -<p>"It's in the garbage."</p> - -<p>"Cover it up. We don't want dead cats and dogs all over the place. -And next time you reach for the salt, make sure there isn't an insect -powder label on it."</p> - -<p>"It was an accident; it could happen to anybody," said the cook -philosophically. "You know, maybe we shouldn't have let that guy go -away. Maybe we ought to have sent him to a doctor."</p> - -<p>"And pay his bills? Don't be a sap. From now on, he's on his own. -Whatever happens to him, we don't know anything about it. We never saw -him before."</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>The only thing that was happening to Ollie was that he was getting -hungrier and hungrier. He had, in fact, never before been so ravenous. -He felt as if he hadn't eaten in years.</p> - -<p>He had met with two strokes of luck—the accessible bottle and the -incredibly generous manager. They had left him just as hungry and -thirsty as before. Now he encountered a third gift of fortune. On the -plate glass window of a restaurant was the flamboyant announcement: -<span class="smcap">eating contest tonight at monte's restaurant! For the Championship -of the World! Entries Being Taken now! No Charge if you Eat Enough for -at Least Three People.</span></p> - -<p>Ollie's face brightened. The way he felt, he could have eaten enough -for a hundred. The fact that the contestants, as he saw upon reading -further, would be limited to hard-boiled eggs made no difference to -him. For once he would have a chance to eat everything he could get -down his yawning gullet.</p> - -<p>That night it was clear that neither the judges nor the audience -thought much of Ollie as an eater. Hungry he undoubtedly was, but it -was obvious that his stomach had shrunk from years of disuse, and -besides, he didn't have the build of a born eater. He was long and -skinny, whereas the other contestants seemed almost as broad and wide -as they were tall. In gaining weight, as in so many other things, the -motto seemed to be that those who already had would get more. Ollie -had too little to start with.</p> - -<p>In order to keep the contest from developing an anticlimax, they -started with Ollie, believing that he would be lucky if he ate ten eggs.</p> - -<p>Ollie was so ravenous that he found it difficult to control himself, -and he made a bad impression by gulping the first egg as fast as he -could. A real eater would have let the egg slide down rapidly yet -gently, without making an obvious effort. This uncontrolled, amateur -speed, thought the judges, could only lead to a stomachache.</p> - -<p>Ollie devoured the second egg, the third, the fourth, and the rest of -his allotted ten. At that point, one of the judges asked, "How do you -feel?"</p> - -<p>"Hungry."</p> - -<p>"Stomach hurt?"</p> - -<p>"Only from hunger. It feels like it got nothin' in it. Somehow, them -eggs don't fill me up."</p> - -<p>Somebody in the audience laughed. The judges exchanged glances and -ordered more eggs brought on. From the crowd of watchers, cries of -encouragement came to Ollie. At this stage, there was still nobody who -thought that he had a chance.</p> - -<p>Ollie proceeded to go through twenty eggs, forty, sixty, a hundred. By -that time, the judges and the crowd were in a state of unprecedented -excitement.</p> - -<p>Again a judge demanded, "How do you feel?"</p> - -<p>"Still hungry. They don't fill me up at all."</p> - -<p>"But those are large eggs. Do you know how much a hundred of them -weigh? Over fifteen pounds!"</p> - -<p>"I don't care how much they weigh. I'm still hungry."</p> - -<p>"Do you mind if we weigh you?"</p> - -<p>"So long as you don't stop givin' me eggs, okay."</p> - -<p>They brought out a scale and Ollie stepped on it. He weighed one -hundred and thirty-nine pounds, on the nose.</p> - -<p>Then he started eating eggs again. At the end of his second hundred, -they weighed him once more. Ollie weighed one hundred thirty-eight and -three-quarters.</p> - -<p>The judges stared at each other and then at Ollie. For a moment the -entire audience sat in awed silence, as if watching a miracle. Then the -mood of awe passed.</p> - -<p>One of the judges said wisely, "He palms them and slips them to a -confederate."</p> - -<p>"Out here on the stage?" demanded another judge. "Where's his -confederate? Besides, you can see for yourself that he eats them. You -can watch them going down his throat."</p> - -<p>"But that's impossible. If they really went down his throat, he'd gain -weight."</p> - -<p>"I don't know how he does it," admitted the other. "But he does."</p> - -<p>"The man is a freak. Let's get some doctors over here."</p> - -<p>Ollie ate another hundred and forty-three eggs, and then had to stop -because the restaurant ran out of them. The other contestants never -even had a chance to get started.</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>When the doctor came and they told him the story, his first impulse -seemed to be to grin. He knew a practical joke when he heard one. But -they put Ollie on the scales—by this time he weighed only a hundred -thirty-eight and a quarter pounds—and fed him a two pound loaf of -bread. Then they weighed him again.</p> - -<p>He was an even one hundred and thirty-eight.</p> - -<p>"At this rate, he'll starve to death," said the doctor, who opened his -little black bag and proceeded to give Ollie a thorough examination.</p> - -<p>Ollie was very unhappy about it because it interfered with his eating, -and he felt more hungry than ever. But they promised to feed him -afterward and, more or less unwillingly, he submitted.</p> - -<p>"Bad teeth, enlarged heart, lesion on each lung, flat feet, hernia, -displaced vertebrae—you name it and he has it," said the doctor. -"Where the devil did he come from?"</p> - -<p>Ollie was working on an order of roast beef and was too busy to reply.</p> - -<p>Somebody said, "He's a rag-picker. I've seen him around."</p> - -<p>"When did he start this eating spree?"</p> - -<p>With stuffed mouth, Ollie mumbled, "Today."</p> - -<p>"Today, eh? What happened today that makes you able to eat so much?"</p> - -<p>"I just feel hungry."</p> - -<p>"I can see that. Look, how about going over to the hospital so we can -really examine you?"</p> - -<p>"No, sir," said Ollie. "You ain't pokin' no needles into me."</p> - -<p>"No needles," agreed the doctor hastily. If there was no other way to -get blood samples, they could always drug him with morphine and he'd -never know what had happened. "We'll just look at you. And we'll feed -you all you can eat."</p> - -<p>"All I can eat? It's a deal!"</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>The humor was crude, but it put the point across—the photographer -assigned to the contest had snapped a picture of Ollie in the middle of -gulping two eggs. One was traveling down his gullet, causing a lump in -his throat, and the other was being stuffed into his mouth at the same -time. The caption writer had entitled the shot: <span class="smcap">the man who broke -the icebox at monte's</span>, and the column alongside was headed, Eats -Three Hundred and Forty-three Eggs. "I'm Hungry!" He Says.</p> - -<p>Zolto put the paper down. "This is the one," he said to his wife. -"There can be no doubt that this person has found it."</p> - -<p>"I knew it was no longer in the alley," said Pojim. Ordinarily a comely -female, she was now deep in thought, and succeeded in looking beautiful -and pensive at the same time. "How are we to get it back without -exciting unwelcome attention?"</p> - -<p>"Frankly," said Zolto, "I don't know. But we'd better think of a way. -He must have mistaken it for a nut and swallowed it. Undoubtedly the -hospital attendants will take X-rays of him and discover it."</p> - -<p>"They won't know what it is."</p> - -<p>"They will operate to remove it, and then they will find out."</p> - -<p>Pojim nodded. "What I don't understand," she said, "is why it had this -effect. When we lost it, it was locked."</p> - -<p>"He must have opened it by accident. Some of these creatures, I have -noticed, have a habit of trying to crack nuts with their teeth. He must -have bitten on the proper switch."</p> - -<p>"The one for inanimate matter? I think, Zolto, that you're right. The -stomach contents are collapsed and passed into our universe through -the transfer. But the stomach itself, being part of a living creature, -cannot pass through the same switch. And the poor creature continually -loses weight because of metabolism. Especially, of course, when he -eats."</p> - -<p>"Poor creature, you call him? You're too soft-hearted, Pojim. What do -you think we'll be if we don't get the transfer back?"</p> - -<p>He hunched up his shoulders and laughed.</p> - -<p>Pojim said, "Control yourself, Zolto. When you laugh, you don't look -human, and you certainly don't sound it."</p> - -<p>"What difference does it make? We're alone."</p> - -<p>"You can never tell when we'll be overheard."</p> - -<p>"Don't change the subject. What are we supposed to do about the -transfer?"</p> - -<p>"We'll think of a way," said Pojim, but he could see she was worried.</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>In the hospital, they had put Ollie into a bed. They had wanted a nurse -to bathe him, but he had objected violently to this indignity, and -finally they had sent in a male orderly to do the job. Now, bathed, -shaven and wearing a silly little nightgown that made him ashamed to -look at himself, he was lying in bed, slowly starving to death.</p> - -<p>A dozen empty plates, the remains of assorted specialties of the -hospital, filled with vitamins and other good things, lay around him. -Everything had tasted fine while going down, but nothing seemed to have -stuck to him.</p> - -<p>All he could do was brood about the puzzled and anxious looks on the -doctors' faces when they examined him.</p> - -<p>The attack came without warning. One moment Ollie was lying there -unhappily, suffering hunger pangs, and the next moment somebody had -punched him in the stomach. The shock made him start and then look -down. But there was nobody near him. The doctors had left him alone -while they looked up articles in textbooks and argued with each other.</p> - -<p>He felt another punch, and then another and another. He yelled in -fright and pain.</p> - -<p>After five minutes, a nurse looked in and asked casually, "Did you -call?"</p> - -<p>"My stomach!" groaned Ollie. "Somebody's hittin' me in my stomach!"</p> - -<p>"It's a tummyache," she said with a cheerful smile. "It should teach -you not to wolf your food."</p> - -<p>Then she caught a glimpse of his stomach, from which Ollie, in his -agony, had cast off the sheet, and she gulped. It was swollen like a -watermelon—or, rather, like a watermelon with great warts. Lumps stuck -out all over it.</p> - -<p>She rushed out, calling, "Doctor Manson! Doctor Manson!"</p> - -<p>When she returned with two doctors, Ollie was in such acute misery that -he didn't even notice them. One doctor said, "Well, I'll be damned!" -and began tapping the swollen stomach.</p> - -<p>The other doctor demanded, "When did this happen?"</p> - -<p>"Right now, I guess," replied the nurse. "Just a few minutes ago his -stomach was as flat as the way it was when you saw it."</p> - -<p>"We'd better give him a shot of morphine to put him out of his pain," -said the first doctor, "and then we'll X-ray him."</p> - -<p>Ollie was in a semi-coma as they lifted him off his bed and wheeled him -into the X-ray room. He didn't hear a word of the ensuing discussion -about the photographs, although the doctors talked freely in front of -him—freely and profanely.</p> - -<p>It was Dr. Manson who demanded, "What in God's name are those things, -anyway?"</p> - -<p>"They look like pineapples and grapefruit," replied the bewildered -X-ray specialist.</p> - -<p>"Square-edged pineapples? Grapefruit with one end pointed?"</p> - -<p>"I didn't say that's what they are," returned the other defensively. "I -said that's what they look like. The grapefruit could be eggplant," he -added in confusion.</p> - -<p>"Eggplant, my foot. How the devil did they get into his stomach, -anyway? He's been eating like a pig, but even a pig couldn't have -gotten those things down its throat."</p> - -<p>"Wake him up and ask him."</p> - -<p>"He doesn't know any more than we do," said the nurse. "He told me that -it felt as if somebody was hitting him in the stomach. That's all he'd -be able to tell us."</p> - -<p>"He's got the damnedest stomach I ever heard of," marveled Dr. Manson. -"Let's open it up and take a look at it from the inside."</p> - -<p>"We'll have to get his consent," said the specialist nervously. "I know -it would be interesting, but we can't cut into him unless he's willing."</p> - -<p>"It would be for his own good. We'd get that unsliced fruit salad out -of him." Dr. Manson stared at the X-ray plates again. "Pineapples, -grapefruit, something that looks like a banana with a small bush on -top. Assorted large round objects. And what looks like a nut. A small -nut."</p> - -<p>If Ollie had been aware, he might have told Dr. Manson that the nut -was the kernel of the trouble. As it was, all he could do was groan.</p> - -<p>"He's coming to," said the nurse.</p> - -<p>"Good," asserted Dr. Manson. "Get a release, Nurse, and the minute he's -capable of following directions, have him sign it."</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>In the corridor outside, two white-clad interns stopped at the door of -Ollie's room and listened. They could not properly have been described -as man and woman, but at any rate one was male and the other female. If -you didn't look at them too closely, they seemed to be human, which, of -course, was what they wanted you to think.</p> - -<p>"Just as I said," observed Zolto. "They intend to operate. And their -attention has already been drawn to the nut."</p> - -<p>"We can stop them by violence, if necessary. But I abhor violence."</p> - -<p>"I know, dear," Zolto said thoughtfully. "What has happened is clear -enough. He kept sending all that food through, and our people analyzed -it and discovered what it was. They must have been surprised to -discover no message from us, but after a while they arrived at the -conclusion that we needed some of our own food and they sent it to us. -It's a good thing that they didn't send more of it at one time."</p> - -<p>"The poor man must be in agony as it is."</p> - -<p>"Never mind the poor man. Think of our own situation."</p> - -<p>"But don't you see, Zolto? His digestive juices can't dissolve such -unfamiliar chemical constituents, and his stomach must be greatly -irritated."</p> - -<p>She broke off for a moment as the nurse came past them, giving them -only a casual glance. The X-ray specialist followed shortly, his face -reflecting the bewilderment he felt as a result of studying the plate -he was holding.</p> - -<p>"That leaves only Dr. Manson with him," said Zolto. "Pojim, I have a -plan. Do you have any of those pandigestive tablets with you?"</p> - -<p>"I always carry them. I never know when in this world I'll run into -something my stomach can't handle."</p> - -<p>"Fine." Zolto stepped back from the doorway, cleared his throat, and -began to yell, "Calling Dr. Manson! Dr. Manson, report to surgery!"</p> - -<p>"You've been seeing too many of their movies," said Pojim.</p> - -<p>But Zolto's trick worked. They heard Dr. Manson mutter, "Damn!" and saw -him rush into the corridor. He passed them without even noticing that -they were there.</p> - -<p>"We have him to ourselves," said Zolto. "Quick, the tablets."</p> - -<p>They stepped into the room, where Zolto passed a small inhalator back -and forth under Ollie's nose. Ollie jerked away from it, and his eyes -opened.</p> - -<p>"Take this," said Pojim, with a persuasive smile. "It will ease your -pain." And she put two tablets into Ollie's surprised mouth.</p> - -<p>Automatically, Ollie swallowed and the tablets sped down to meet the -collection in his stomach. Pojim gave him another smile, and then she -and Zolto were out of the room.</p> - -<p>To Ollie, things seemed to be happening in more and more bewildering -fashion. No sooner had these strange doctors left than Dr. Manson came -rushing back, cursing, in a way that would have shocked Hippocrates, -the unknown idiot who had summoned him to surgery. Then the nurse -came in, with a paper. Ollie gathered that he was being asked to sign -something.</p> - -<p>He shook his head vigorously. "Not me. I don't sign <i>nothin'</i>, sister."</p> - -<p>"It's a matter of life and death. Your own life and death. We have to -get those things out of your stomach."</p> - -<p>"No, sir, you're not cuttin' me open."</p> - -<p>Dr. Manson gritted his teeth in frustration. "You don't feel so much -pain now because of the morphine I gave you. But it's going to wear off -in a few minutes and then you'll be in agony again. You'll have to let -us operate."</p> - -<p>"No, sir," repeated Ollie stubbornly. "You're not cuttin' me open."</p> - -<p>And then he almost leaped from his bed. His already distended stomach -seemed to swell outward, and before the astonished eyes of doctor and -nurse, a strange new bump appeared.</p> - -<p>"Help!" yelled Ollie.</p> - -<p>"That's exactly what we're trying to do," said Dr. Manson angrily. -"Only you won't let us. Now sign that paper, man, and stop your -nonsense."</p> - -<p>Ollie groaned and signed. The next moment he was being rushed into the -operating room.</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>The morphine was wearing off rapidly, and he lay, still groaning, on -the table. From the ceiling, bright lights beat down upon him. Near his -head the anesthetist stood with his cone of sleep poised in readiness. -At one side a happy Dr. Manson was slipping rubber gloves on his -antiseptic hands, while the attentive nurses and assistants waited.</p> - -<hr class="chap" /> - -<div class="figcenter"> - <img src="images/illus.jpg" width="352" height="500" alt=""/> -</div> - -<hr class="chap" /> - -<p>Two interns were standing near the doorway. One of them, Zolto, said -softly, "We may have to use violence after all. They must not find it."</p> - -<p>"I should have given him a third tablet," said Pojim, the other intern, -regretfully. "Who would have suspected that the action would be so -slow?"</p> - -<p>They fell silent. Zolto slipped a hand into his pocket and grasped the -weapon, the one he had hoped he wouldn't have to use.</p> - -<p>Dr. Manson nodded curtly and said, "Anesthetic."</p> - -<p>And then, as the anesthetist bent forward, it happened. Ollie's -uncovered stomach, lying there in wait for the knife, seemed to heave -and boil. Ollie shrieked and, as the assembled medicos watched in dazed -fascination, the knobs and bumps smoothed out. The whole stomach began -to shrink, like a cake falling in when some one has slammed the oven -door. The pandigestive tablets had finally acted.</p> - -<p>Ollie sat up. He forgot that he was wearing the skimpy and shameless -nightgown, forgot, too, that he had a roomful of spectators. He pushed -away the anesthetist who tried to stop him.</p> - -<p>"I feel fine," he said.</p> - -<p>"Lie down," ordered Dr. Manson sternly. "We're going to operate and -find out what's wrong with you."</p> - -<p>"You're not cuttin' into me," said Ollie. He swung his feet to -the floor and stood up. "There ain't nothin' wrong with me. I feel -wonderful. For the first time in my life I ain't hungry, and I'm -spoilin' for trouble. Don't nobody try to stop me."</p> - -<p>He started to march across the floor, pushing his way through the -protesting doctors.</p> - -<p>"This way," said one of the interns near the door. "We'll get your -clothes." Ollie looked at her in suspicion, but she went on, "Remember? -I'm the one who gave you the tablets to make the pain go away."</p> - -<p>"They sure worked," said Ollie happily, and allowed himself to be led -along.</p> - -<p>He heard the uproar behind him, but he paid no attention. Whatever -they wanted, he was getting out of here, fast. There might have been -trouble, but at a critical point the public address system swung into -operation, thanks to the foresight of his intern friends, who had -rigged up a special portable attachment to the microphone. It started -calling Dr. Manson, calling Dr. Kolanyi, calling Dr. Pumber, and all -the others.</p> - -<p>In the confusion, Ollie escaped and found himself, for the first time -in his life, a passenger in a taxicab. With him were the two friendly -interns, no longer in white.</p> - -<p>"Just in case any more of those lumps appear in your stomach," said -the female, "you'd better take another couple of tablets."</p> - -<p>She was so persuasive that Ollie put up only token resistance. The -tablets went down his stomach, and then he settled back to enjoy the -cab ride. It was only later that he wondered where they were taking -him. By that time, he was too sleepy to wonder very much.</p> - -<p>With the aid of the first two tablets, he had digested the equivalent -of a tremendous meal. The blood coursed merrily in his veins and -arteries, and he had a warm sensation of well-being.</p> - -<p>As the taxi sped along, his eyes closed.</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>"You transmitted the message in one of the latter tablets?" asked Zolto -in their native tongue.</p> - -<p>"I have explained all that has happened," replied his wife. "They will -stop sending food and wait for other directives."</p> - -<p>"Good. Now we'll have to get the transfer out of him as soon as -possible. We ourselves can operate and he will never be the wiser."</p> - -<p>"I wonder," said Pojim. "Once we have the transfer, it will only be a -nuisance to us. We'll have to guard it carefully and be in continual -fear of losing it. Perhaps it would be more sensible to leave it inside -him."</p> - -<p>"Inside him? Pojim, my sweet, have you taken leave of your senses?"</p> - -<p>"Not at all. It is easier to guard a man than a tiny object. I took -a look at one of the X-ray plates, and it is clear that the transfer -switch has adhered to his stomach. It will remain there indefinitely. -Suppose we focus a transpositor on that stomach of his. Then, as -the objects we want arrive from our own universe in their collapsed -condition, we can transpose them into our laboratory, enlarge them, and -send them off to Aldebaran, where they are needed."</p> - -<p>"But suppose that he and that stomach of his move around!"</p> - -<p>"He will stay in one place if we treat him well. Don't you see, Zolto? -He is a creature who has always lacked food. We shall supply him such -food as his own kind have never dreamed of, complete with pandigestion -fluid. At the same time, we shall set him to doing light work in order -to keep him busy. Much of his task will involve studying and improving -himself. And at night we shall receive the things we need from our own -universe."</p> - -<p>"And when we have enough to supply the colony on Aldebaran II?"</p> - -<p>"Then it will be time enough to remove the transfer switch."</p> - -<p>Zolto laughed. It was a laugh that would have been curiously out of -place in a human being, and if the taxi driver hadn't been so busy -steering his way through traffic, he would have turned around to look. -Pojim sensed the danger, and held up a warning finger.</p> - -<p>Zolto subsided. "You have remarkable ideas, my wife. Still, I see no -reason why this should not work. Let us try it."</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>Ollie awoke to a new life. He was feeling better than he had ever -felt in his entire miserable existence. The two interns who had come -along with him had been transformed magically into a kindly lady and -gentleman, who wished to hire him to do easy work at an excellent -salary. Ollie let himself be hired.</p> - -<p>He had his choice of things to eat now, but, strangely enough, he no -longer had his old hunger. It was as if he were being fed from some -hidden source, and he ate, one might almost have said, for the looks of -it. The little he did consume, however, seemed to go a long way.</p> - -<p>He gained weight, his muscles hardened, his old teeth fell out and new -ones appeared. He himself was astonished at this latter phenomenon, but -after his previous experience at the hospital, he kept his astonishment -to himself. The spots on his lungs disappeared, his spine straightened. -After a time he reached a weight of a hundred and ninety pounds, and -his eyes were bright and clear. At night he slept the sleep of the -just—or the drugged.</p> - -<p>At first he was happy. But after several months, there came a feeling -of boredom. He sought out Mr. and Mrs. Zolto, and said, "I'm sorry, I -can't stay here any longer."</p> - -<p>"Why?" asked the lady.</p> - -<p>"There's no room here, ma'am, for advancement," he said, almost -apologetically. "I've been studyin' and I got ideas about things I can -do. All sorts of ideas."</p> - -<p>Pojim and Zolto, who had planted the ideas, nodded solemnly.</p> - -<p>Pojim said, "We're glad to hear that, Ollie. The fact is that we -ourselves had decided to move to—to a warmer climate, some distance -away from here. We were wondering how you'd get along without us."</p> - -<p>"Don't you worry about me. I'll do fine."</p> - -<p>"Well, that's splendid. But it would be convenient to us if you could -wait till tomorrow. We'd like to give you something to remember us by."</p> - -<p>"I'll be glad to wait, ma'am."</p> - -<p>That night Ollie had a strange nightmare. He dreamed that he was on -the operating table again, and that the doctors and nurses were once -more closing in on him. He opened his mouth to scream, but no sound -came out. And then the two interns were there, once more wearing their -uniforms.</p> - -<p>The female said, "It's all right. It's perfectly all right. We're just -removing the transfer switch. In the morning you won't even remember -what happened."</p> - -<p>And, in fact, in the morning he didn't. He had only a vague feeling -that something <i>had</i> happened.</p> - -<p>They shook hands with him and they gave him a very fine letter of -reference, in case he tried to get another job, and Mrs. Zolto -presented him with an envelope in which there were several bills whose -size later made his eyes almost pop out of his head.</p> - -<p>He walked down the street as if it belonged to him, or were going to. -Gone was the slouch, gone the bleariness of the eyes, gone the hangdog -look.</p> - -<p>Gone was all memory of the dismal past.</p> - -<p>And then Ollie had a strange feeling. At first it seemed so peculiar -that he couldn't figure out what it was. It started in his stomach, -which seemed to turn over and almost tie itself into a knot. He felt a -twinge of pain and winced almost perceptibly.</p> - -<p>It took him several minutes to realize what it was.</p> - -<p>For the first time in months, he was hungry.</p> - - - - - - - -<pre> - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Shipping Clerk, by William Morrison - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SHIPPING CLERK *** - -***** This file should be named 50796-h.htm or 50796-h.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/5/0/7/9/50796/ - -Produced by Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net - - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - - - -Title: Shipping Clerk - -Author: William Morrison - -Release Date: December 30, 2015 [EBook #50796] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ASCII - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SHIPPING CLERK *** - - - - -Produced by Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net - - - - - - - - - - Shipping Clerk - - By WILLIAM MORRISON - - [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from - Galaxy Science Fiction June 1952. - Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that - the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.] - - - - - If Ollie knew the work he was doing, he would - have resigned--if resigning were possible! - - -If there had ever been a time when Ollie Keith hadn't been hungry, it -was so far in the past that he couldn't remember it. He was hungry now -as he walked through the alley, his eyes shifting lusterlessly from one -heap of rubbish to the next. He was hungry through and through, all -one hundred and forty pounds of him, the flesh distributed so gauntly -over his tall frame that in spots it seemed about to wear through, as -his clothes had. That it hadn't done so in forty-two years sometimes -struck Ollie as in the nature of a miracle. - -He worked for a junk collector and he was unsuccessful in his present -job, as he had been at everything else. Ollie had followed the first -part of the rags-to-riches formula with classic exactness. He had been -born to rags, and then, as if that hadn't been enough, his parents had -died, and he had been left an orphan. He should have gone to the big -city, found a job in the rich merchant's counting house, and saved the -pretty daughter, acquiring her and her fortune in the process. - -It hadn't worked out that way. In the orphanage where he had spent so -many unhappy years, both his food and his education had been skimped. -He had later been hired out to a farmer, but he hadn't been strong -enough for farm labor, and he had been sent back. - -His life since then had followed an unhappy pattern. Lacking strength -and skill, he had been unable to find and hold a good job. Without a -good job, he had been unable to pay for the food and medical care, and -for the training he would have needed to acquire strength and skill. -Once, in the search for food and training, he had offered himself to -the Army, but the doctors who examined him had quickly turned thumbs -down, and the Army had rejected him with contempt. They wanted better -human material than that. - -How he had managed to survive at all to the present was another -miracle. By this time, of course, he knew, as the radio comic put it, -that he wasn't long for this world. And to make the passage to another -world even easier, he had taken to drink. Rot gut stilled the pangs of -hunger even more effectively than inadequate food did. And it gave -him the first moments of happiness, spurious though they were, that he -could remember. - -Now, as he sought through the heaps of rubbish for usable rags or -redeemable milk bottles, his eyes lighted on something unexpected. -Right at the edge of the curb lay a small nut, species indeterminate. -If he had his usual luck, it would turn out to be withered inside, but -at least he could hope for the best. - - * * * * * - -He picked up the nut, banged it futilely against the ground, and then -looked around for a rock with which to crack it. None was in sight. -Rather fearfully, he put it in his mouth and tried to crack it between -his teeth. His teeth were in as poor condition as the rest of him, and -the chances were that they would crack before the nut did. - -The nut slipped and Ollie gurgled, threw his hands into the air and -almost choked. Then he got it out of his windpipe and, a second later, -breathed easily. The nut was in his stomach, still uncracked. And -Ollie, it seemed to him, was hungrier than ever. - -The alley was a failure. His life had been a progression from rags to -rags, and these last rags were inferior to the first. There were no -milk bottles, there was no junk worth salvaging. - -At the end of the alley was a barber shop, and here Ollie had a great -and unexpected stroke of luck. He found a bottle. The bottle was no -container for milk and it wasn't empty. It was standing on a small -table near an open window in the rear of the barber shop. Ollie found -that he could get it by simply stretching out his long, gaunt arm for -it, without climbing in through the window at all. - -He took a long swig, and then another. The liquor tasted far better -than anything he had ever bought. - -When he returned the bottle to its place, it was empty. - -Strangely enough, despite its excellent quality, or perhaps, he -thought, _because_ of it, the whiskey failed to have its usual effect -on him. It left him completely sober and clear-eyed, but hungrier than -ever. - -In his desperation, Ollie did something that he seldom dared to do. He -went into a restaurant, not too good a restaurant or he would never -have been allowed to take a seat, and ordered a meal he couldn't pay -for. - -He knew what would happen, of course, after he had eaten. He would -put on an act about having lost his money, but that wouldn't fool the -manager for more than one second. If the man was feeling good and -needed help, he'd let Ollie work the price out washing dishes. If he -was a little grumpy and had all the dishwashers he needed, he'd have -them boot the tar out of Ollie and then turn him over to the police. - -The soup was thick and tasty, although tasty in a way that no gourmet -would have appreciated. The mess was food, however, and Ollie gulped it -down gratefully. But it did nothing to satisfy his hunger. Likewise, -the stew had every possible leftover thrown into it, and none of it -gave Ollie any feeling of satisfaction. Even the dessert and the muddy -coffee left him as empty as before. - -The waiter had been in the back room with the cook. Now Ollie saw him -signal to the manager, and watched the manager hasten back. He closed -his eyes. They were onto him; there was no doubt about it. For a -moment he considered trying to get out of the front door before they -closed in, but there was another waiter present, keeping an eye on the -patrons, and he knew that he would never make it. He took a deep breath -and waited for the roof to fall in on him. - -He heard the manager's foot-steps and opened his eyes. The manager -said, "Uh--look, bud, about that meal you ate--" - -"Not bad," observed Ollie brightly. - -"Glad you liked it." - -He noticed little beads of sweat on the manager's forehead, and -wondered what had put them there. He said, "Only trouble is, it ain't -fillin'. I'm just as hungry as I was before." - -"It didn't fill you up, huh? That's too bad. I'll tell you what I'll -do. Rather than see you go away dissatisfied, I won't charge you for -the meal. Not a cent." - -Ollie blinked. This made no sense whatever. All the same, if not for -the gnawing in his stomach, he would have picked himself up and run. As -it was, he said, "Thanks. Guess in that case I'll have another order of -stew. Maybe this time it'll stick to my ribs." - -"Not the stew," replied the manager nervously. "You had the last that -was left. Try the roast beef." - -"Hmm, that's more than I was gonna spend." - -"No charge," said the manager. "For you, no charge at all." - -"Then gimme a double order. I feel starved." - -The double order went down the hatch, yet Ollie felt just as empty as -ever. But he was afraid to press his luck too far, and after he had -downed one more dessert--also without charge--he reluctantly picked -himself up and walked out. He was too hungry to spend any more time -wondering why he had got a free meal. - -In the back room of the restaurant, the manager sank weakly into a -chair. "I was afraid he was going to insist on paying for it. Then we'd -really have been on a spot." - -"Guess he was too glad to get it for free," the cook said. - -"Well, if anything happens to him now, it'll happen away from here." - -"Suppose they take a look at what's in his stomach." - -"He still won't be able to sue us. What did you do with the rest of -that stew?" - -"It's in the garbage." - -"Cover it up. We don't want dead cats and dogs all over the place. -And next time you reach for the salt, make sure there isn't an insect -powder label on it." - -"It was an accident; it could happen to anybody," said the cook -philosophically. "You know, maybe we shouldn't have let that guy go -away. Maybe we ought to have sent him to a doctor." - -"And pay his bills? Don't be a sap. From now on, he's on his own. -Whatever happens to him, we don't know anything about it. We never saw -him before." - - * * * * * - -The only thing that was happening to Ollie was that he was getting -hungrier and hungrier. He had, in fact, never before been so ravenous. -He felt as if he hadn't eaten in years. - -He had met with two strokes of luck--the accessible bottle and the -incredibly generous manager. They had left him just as hungry and -thirsty as before. Now he encountered a third gift of fortune. On the -plate glass window of a restaurant was the flamboyant announcement: -EATING CONTEST TONIGHT AT MONTE'S RESTAURANT! FOR THE CHAMPIONSHIP -OF THE WORLD! ENTRIES BEING TAKEN NOW! NO CHARGE IF YOU EAT ENOUGH FOR -AT LEAST THREE PEOPLE. - -Ollie's face brightened. The way he felt, he could have eaten enough -for a hundred. The fact that the contestants, as he saw upon reading -further, would be limited to hard-boiled eggs made no difference to -him. For once he would have a chance to eat everything he could get -down his yawning gullet. - -That night it was clear that neither the judges nor the audience -thought much of Ollie as an eater. Hungry he undoubtedly was, but it -was obvious that his stomach had shrunk from years of disuse, and -besides, he didn't have the build of a born eater. He was long and -skinny, whereas the other contestants seemed almost as broad and wide -as they were tall. In gaining weight, as in so many other things, the -motto seemed to be that those who already had would get more. Ollie -had too little to start with. - -In order to keep the contest from developing an anticlimax, they -started with Ollie, believing that he would be lucky if he ate ten eggs. - -Ollie was so ravenous that he found it difficult to control himself, -and he made a bad impression by gulping the first egg as fast as he -could. A real eater would have let the egg slide down rapidly yet -gently, without making an obvious effort. This uncontrolled, amateur -speed, thought the judges, could only lead to a stomachache. - -Ollie devoured the second egg, the third, the fourth, and the rest of -his allotted ten. At that point, one of the judges asked, "How do you -feel?" - -"Hungry." - -"Stomach hurt?" - -"Only from hunger. It feels like it got nothin' in it. Somehow, them -eggs don't fill me up." - -Somebody in the audience laughed. The judges exchanged glances and -ordered more eggs brought on. From the crowd of watchers, cries of -encouragement came to Ollie. At this stage, there was still nobody who -thought that he had a chance. - -Ollie proceeded to go through twenty eggs, forty, sixty, a hundred. By -that time, the judges and the crowd were in a state of unprecedented -excitement. - -Again a judge demanded, "How do you feel?" - -"Still hungry. They don't fill me up at all." - -"But those are large eggs. Do you know how much a hundred of them -weigh? Over fifteen pounds!" - -"I don't care how much they weigh. I'm still hungry." - -"Do you mind if we weigh you?" - -"So long as you don't stop givin' me eggs, okay." - -They brought out a scale and Ollie stepped on it. He weighed one -hundred and thirty-nine pounds, on the nose. - -Then he started eating eggs again. At the end of his second hundred, -they weighed him once more. Ollie weighed one hundred thirty-eight and -three-quarters. - -The judges stared at each other and then at Ollie. For a moment the -entire audience sat in awed silence, as if watching a miracle. Then the -mood of awe passed. - -One of the judges said wisely, "He palms them and slips them to a -confederate." - -"Out here on the stage?" demanded another judge. "Where's his -confederate? Besides, you can see for yourself that he eats them. You -can watch them going down his throat." - -"But that's impossible. If they really went down his throat, he'd gain -weight." - -"I don't know how he does it," admitted the other. "But he does." - -"The man is a freak. Let's get some doctors over here." - -Ollie ate another hundred and forty-three eggs, and then had to stop -because the restaurant ran out of them. The other contestants never -even had a chance to get started. - - * * * * * - -When the doctor came and they told him the story, his first impulse -seemed to be to grin. He knew a practical joke when he heard one. But -they put Ollie on the scales--by this time he weighed only a hundred -thirty-eight and a quarter pounds--and fed him a two pound loaf of -bread. Then they weighed him again. - -He was an even one hundred and thirty-eight. - -"At this rate, he'll starve to death," said the doctor, who opened his -little black bag and proceeded to give Ollie a thorough examination. - -Ollie was very unhappy about it because it interfered with his eating, -and he felt more hungry than ever. But they promised to feed him -afterward and, more or less unwillingly, he submitted. - -"Bad teeth, enlarged heart, lesion on each lung, flat feet, hernia, -displaced vertebrae--you name it and he has it," said the doctor. -"Where the devil did he come from?" - -Ollie was working on an order of roast beef and was too busy to reply. - -Somebody said, "He's a rag-picker. I've seen him around." - -"When did he start this eating spree?" - -With stuffed mouth, Ollie mumbled, "Today." - -"Today, eh? What happened today that makes you able to eat so much?" - -"I just feel hungry." - -"I can see that. Look, how about going over to the hospital so we can -really examine you?" - -"No, sir," said Ollie. "You ain't pokin' no needles into me." - -"No needles," agreed the doctor hastily. If there was no other way to -get blood samples, they could always drug him with morphine and he'd -never know what had happened. "We'll just look at you. And we'll feed -you all you can eat." - -"All I can eat? It's a deal!" - - * * * * * - -The humor was crude, but it put the point across--the photographer -assigned to the contest had snapped a picture of Ollie in the middle of -gulping two eggs. One was traveling down his gullet, causing a lump in -his throat, and the other was being stuffed into his mouth at the same -time. The caption writer had entitled the shot: THE MAN WHO BROKE -THE ICEBOX AT MONTE'S, and the column alongside was headed, Eats -Three Hundred and Forty-three Eggs. "I'm Hungry!" He Says. - -Zolto put the paper down. "This is the one," he said to his wife. -"There can be no doubt that this person has found it." - -"I knew it was no longer in the alley," said Pojim. Ordinarily a comely -female, she was now deep in thought, and succeeded in looking beautiful -and pensive at the same time. "How are we to get it back without -exciting unwelcome attention?" - -"Frankly," said Zolto, "I don't know. But we'd better think of a way. -He must have mistaken it for a nut and swallowed it. Undoubtedly the -hospital attendants will take X-rays of him and discover it." - -"They won't know what it is." - -"They will operate to remove it, and then they will find out." - -Pojim nodded. "What I don't understand," she said, "is why it had this -effect. When we lost it, it was locked." - -"He must have opened it by accident. Some of these creatures, I have -noticed, have a habit of trying to crack nuts with their teeth. He must -have bitten on the proper switch." - -"The one for inanimate matter? I think, Zolto, that you're right. The -stomach contents are collapsed and passed into our universe through -the transfer. But the stomach itself, being part of a living creature, -cannot pass through the same switch. And the poor creature continually -loses weight because of metabolism. Especially, of course, when he -eats." - -"Poor creature, you call him? You're too soft-hearted, Pojim. What do -you think we'll be if we don't get the transfer back?" - -He hunched up his shoulders and laughed. - -Pojim said, "Control yourself, Zolto. When you laugh, you don't look -human, and you certainly don't sound it." - -"What difference does it make? We're alone." - -"You can never tell when we'll be overheard." - -"Don't change the subject. What are we supposed to do about the -transfer?" - -"We'll think of a way," said Pojim, but he could see she was worried. - - * * * * * - -In the hospital, they had put Ollie into a bed. They had wanted a nurse -to bathe him, but he had objected violently to this indignity, and -finally they had sent in a male orderly to do the job. Now, bathed, -shaven and wearing a silly little nightgown that made him ashamed to -look at himself, he was lying in bed, slowly starving to death. - -A dozen empty plates, the remains of assorted specialties of the -hospital, filled with vitamins and other good things, lay around him. -Everything had tasted fine while going down, but nothing seemed to have -stuck to him. - -All he could do was brood about the puzzled and anxious looks on the -doctors' faces when they examined him. - -The attack came without warning. One moment Ollie was lying there -unhappily, suffering hunger pangs, and the next moment somebody had -punched him in the stomach. The shock made him start and then look -down. But there was nobody near him. The doctors had left him alone -while they looked up articles in textbooks and argued with each other. - -He felt another punch, and then another and another. He yelled in -fright and pain. - -After five minutes, a nurse looked in and asked casually, "Did you -call?" - -"My stomach!" groaned Ollie. "Somebody's hittin' me in my stomach!" - -"It's a tummyache," she said with a cheerful smile. "It should teach -you not to wolf your food." - -Then she caught a glimpse of his stomach, from which Ollie, in his -agony, had cast off the sheet, and she gulped. It was swollen like a -watermelon--or, rather, like a watermelon with great warts. Lumps stuck -out all over it. - -She rushed out, calling, "Doctor Manson! Doctor Manson!" - -When she returned with two doctors, Ollie was in such acute misery that -he didn't even notice them. One doctor said, "Well, I'll be damned!" -and began tapping the swollen stomach. - -The other doctor demanded, "When did this happen?" - -"Right now, I guess," replied the nurse. "Just a few minutes ago his -stomach was as flat as the way it was when you saw it." - -"We'd better give him a shot of morphine to put him out of his pain," -said the first doctor, "and then we'll X-ray him." - -Ollie was in a semi-coma as they lifted him off his bed and wheeled him -into the X-ray room. He didn't hear a word of the ensuing discussion -about the photographs, although the doctors talked freely in front of -him--freely and profanely. - -It was Dr. Manson who demanded, "What in God's name are those things, -anyway?" - -"They look like pineapples and grapefruit," replied the bewildered -X-ray specialist. - -"Square-edged pineapples? Grapefruit with one end pointed?" - -"I didn't say that's what they are," returned the other defensively. "I -said that's what they look like. The grapefruit could be eggplant," he -added in confusion. - -"Eggplant, my foot. How the devil did they get into his stomach, -anyway? He's been eating like a pig, but even a pig couldn't have -gotten those things down its throat." - -"Wake him up and ask him." - -"He doesn't know any more than we do," said the nurse. "He told me that -it felt as if somebody was hitting him in the stomach. That's all he'd -be able to tell us." - -"He's got the damnedest stomach I ever heard of," marveled Dr. Manson. -"Let's open it up and take a look at it from the inside." - -"We'll have to get his consent," said the specialist nervously. "I know -it would be interesting, but we can't cut into him unless he's willing." - -"It would be for his own good. We'd get that unsliced fruit salad out -of him." Dr. Manson stared at the X-ray plates again. "Pineapples, -grapefruit, something that looks like a banana with a small bush on -top. Assorted large round objects. And what looks like a nut. A small -nut." - -If Ollie had been aware, he might have told Dr. Manson that the nut -was the kernel of the trouble. As it was, all he could do was groan. - -"He's coming to," said the nurse. - -"Good," asserted Dr. Manson. "Get a release, Nurse, and the minute he's -capable of following directions, have him sign it." - - * * * * * - -In the corridor outside, two white-clad interns stopped at the door of -Ollie's room and listened. They could not properly have been described -as man and woman, but at any rate one was male and the other female. If -you didn't look at them too closely, they seemed to be human, which, of -course, was what they wanted you to think. - -"Just as I said," observed Zolto. "They intend to operate. And their -attention has already been drawn to the nut." - -"We can stop them by violence, if necessary. But I abhor violence." - -"I know, dear," Zolto said thoughtfully. "What has happened is clear -enough. He kept sending all that food through, and our people analyzed -it and discovered what it was. They must have been surprised to -discover no message from us, but after a while they arrived at the -conclusion that we needed some of our own food and they sent it to us. -It's a good thing that they didn't send more of it at one time." - -"The poor man must be in agony as it is." - -"Never mind the poor man. Think of our own situation." - -"But don't you see, Zolto? His digestive juices can't dissolve such -unfamiliar chemical constituents, and his stomach must be greatly -irritated." - -She broke off for a moment as the nurse came past them, giving them -only a casual glance. The X-ray specialist followed shortly, his face -reflecting the bewilderment he felt as a result of studying the plate -he was holding. - -"That leaves only Dr. Manson with him," said Zolto. "Pojim, I have a -plan. Do you have any of those pandigestive tablets with you?" - -"I always carry them. I never know when in this world I'll run into -something my stomach can't handle." - -"Fine." Zolto stepped back from the doorway, cleared his throat, and -began to yell, "Calling Dr. Manson! Dr. Manson, report to surgery!" - -"You've been seeing too many of their movies," said Pojim. - -But Zolto's trick worked. They heard Dr. Manson mutter, "Damn!" and saw -him rush into the corridor. He passed them without even noticing that -they were there. - -"We have him to ourselves," said Zolto. "Quick, the tablets." - -They stepped into the room, where Zolto passed a small inhalator back -and forth under Ollie's nose. Ollie jerked away from it, and his eyes -opened. - -"Take this," said Pojim, with a persuasive smile. "It will ease your -pain." And she put two tablets into Ollie's surprised mouth. - -Automatically, Ollie swallowed and the tablets sped down to meet the -collection in his stomach. Pojim gave him another smile, and then she -and Zolto were out of the room. - -To Ollie, things seemed to be happening in more and more bewildering -fashion. No sooner had these strange doctors left than Dr. Manson came -rushing back, cursing, in a way that would have shocked Hippocrates, -the unknown idiot who had summoned him to surgery. Then the nurse -came in, with a paper. Ollie gathered that he was being asked to sign -something. - -He shook his head vigorously. "Not me. I don't sign _nothin'_, sister." - -"It's a matter of life and death. Your own life and death. We have to -get those things out of your stomach." - -"No, sir, you're not cuttin' me open." - -Dr. Manson gritted his teeth in frustration. "You don't feel so much -pain now because of the morphine I gave you. But it's going to wear off -in a few minutes and then you'll be in agony again. You'll have to let -us operate." - -"No, sir," repeated Ollie stubbornly. "You're not cuttin' me open." - -And then he almost leaped from his bed. His already distended stomach -seemed to swell outward, and before the astonished eyes of doctor and -nurse, a strange new bump appeared. - -"Help!" yelled Ollie. - -"That's exactly what we're trying to do," said Dr. Manson angrily. -"Only you won't let us. Now sign that paper, man, and stop your -nonsense." - -Ollie groaned and signed. The next moment he was being rushed into the -operating room. - - * * * * * - -The morphine was wearing off rapidly, and he lay, still groaning, on -the table. From the ceiling, bright lights beat down upon him. Near his -head the anesthetist stood with his cone of sleep poised in readiness. -At one side a happy Dr. Manson was slipping rubber gloves on his -antiseptic hands, while the attentive nurses and assistants waited. - -Two interns were standing near the doorway. One of them, Zolto, said -softly, "We may have to use violence after all. They must not find it." - -"I should have given him a third tablet," said Pojim, the other intern, -regretfully. "Who would have suspected that the action would be so -slow?" - -They fell silent. Zolto slipped a hand into his pocket and grasped the -weapon, the one he had hoped he wouldn't have to use. - -Dr. Manson nodded curtly and said, "Anesthetic." - -And then, as the anesthetist bent forward, it happened. Ollie's -uncovered stomach, lying there in wait for the knife, seemed to heave -and boil. Ollie shrieked and, as the assembled medicos watched in dazed -fascination, the knobs and bumps smoothed out. The whole stomach began -to shrink, like a cake falling in when some one has slammed the oven -door. The pandigestive tablets had finally acted. - -Ollie sat up. He forgot that he was wearing the skimpy and shameless -nightgown, forgot, too, that he had a roomful of spectators. He pushed -away the anesthetist who tried to stop him. - -"I feel fine," he said. - -"Lie down," ordered Dr. Manson sternly. "We're going to operate and -find out what's wrong with you." - -"You're not cuttin' into me," said Ollie. He swung his feet to -the floor and stood up. "There ain't nothin' wrong with me. I feel -wonderful. For the first time in my life I ain't hungry, and I'm -spoilin' for trouble. Don't nobody try to stop me." - -He started to march across the floor, pushing his way through the -protesting doctors. - -"This way," said one of the interns near the door. "We'll get your -clothes." Ollie looked at her in suspicion, but she went on, "Remember? -I'm the one who gave you the tablets to make the pain go away." - -"They sure worked," said Ollie happily, and allowed himself to be led -along. - -He heard the uproar behind him, but he paid no attention. Whatever -they wanted, he was getting out of here, fast. There might have been -trouble, but at a critical point the public address system swung into -operation, thanks to the foresight of his intern friends, who had -rigged up a special portable attachment to the microphone. It started -calling Dr. Manson, calling Dr. Kolanyi, calling Dr. Pumber, and all -the others. - -In the confusion, Ollie escaped and found himself, for the first time -in his life, a passenger in a taxicab. With him were the two friendly -interns, no longer in white. - -"Just in case any more of those lumps appear in your stomach," said -the female, "you'd better take another couple of tablets." - -She was so persuasive that Ollie put up only token resistance. The -tablets went down his stomach, and then he settled back to enjoy the -cab ride. It was only later that he wondered where they were taking -him. By that time, he was too sleepy to wonder very much. - -With the aid of the first two tablets, he had digested the equivalent -of a tremendous meal. The blood coursed merrily in his veins and -arteries, and he had a warm sensation of well-being. - -As the taxi sped along, his eyes closed. - - * * * * * - -"You transmitted the message in one of the latter tablets?" asked Zolto -in their native tongue. - -"I have explained all that has happened," replied his wife. "They will -stop sending food and wait for other directives." - -"Good. Now we'll have to get the transfer out of him as soon as -possible. We ourselves can operate and he will never be the wiser." - -"I wonder," said Pojim. "Once we have the transfer, it will only be a -nuisance to us. We'll have to guard it carefully and be in continual -fear of losing it. Perhaps it would be more sensible to leave it inside -him." - -"Inside him? Pojim, my sweet, have you taken leave of your senses?" - -"Not at all. It is easier to guard a man than a tiny object. I took -a look at one of the X-ray plates, and it is clear that the transfer -switch has adhered to his stomach. It will remain there indefinitely. -Suppose we focus a transpositor on that stomach of his. Then, as -the objects we want arrive from our own universe in their collapsed -condition, we can transpose them into our laboratory, enlarge them, and -send them off to Aldebaran, where they are needed." - -"But suppose that he and that stomach of his move around!" - -"He will stay in one place if we treat him well. Don't you see, Zolto? -He is a creature who has always lacked food. We shall supply him such -food as his own kind have never dreamed of, complete with pandigestion -fluid. At the same time, we shall set him to doing light work in order -to keep him busy. Much of his task will involve studying and improving -himself. And at night we shall receive the things we need from our own -universe." - -"And when we have enough to supply the colony on Aldebaran II?" - -"Then it will be time enough to remove the transfer switch." - -Zolto laughed. It was a laugh that would have been curiously out of -place in a human being, and if the taxi driver hadn't been so busy -steering his way through traffic, he would have turned around to look. -Pojim sensed the danger, and held up a warning finger. - -Zolto subsided. "You have remarkable ideas, my wife. Still, I see no -reason why this should not work. Let us try it." - - * * * * * - -Ollie awoke to a new life. He was feeling better than he had ever -felt in his entire miserable existence. The two interns who had come -along with him had been transformed magically into a kindly lady and -gentleman, who wished to hire him to do easy work at an excellent -salary. Ollie let himself be hired. - -He had his choice of things to eat now, but, strangely enough, he no -longer had his old hunger. It was as if he were being fed from some -hidden source, and he ate, one might almost have said, for the looks of -it. The little he did consume, however, seemed to go a long way. - -He gained weight, his muscles hardened, his old teeth fell out and new -ones appeared. He himself was astonished at this latter phenomenon, but -after his previous experience at the hospital, he kept his astonishment -to himself. The spots on his lungs disappeared, his spine straightened. -After a time he reached a weight of a hundred and ninety pounds, and -his eyes were bright and clear. At night he slept the sleep of the -just--or the drugged. - -At first he was happy. But after several months, there came a feeling -of boredom. He sought out Mr. and Mrs. Zolto, and said, "I'm sorry, I -can't stay here any longer." - -"Why?" asked the lady. - -"There's no room here, ma'am, for advancement," he said, almost -apologetically. "I've been studyin' and I got ideas about things I can -do. All sorts of ideas." - -Pojim and Zolto, who had planted the ideas, nodded solemnly. - -Pojim said, "We're glad to hear that, Ollie. The fact is that we -ourselves had decided to move to--to a warmer climate, some distance -away from here. We were wondering how you'd get along without us." - -"Don't you worry about me. I'll do fine." - -"Well, that's splendid. But it would be convenient to us if you could -wait till tomorrow. We'd like to give you something to remember us by." - -"I'll be glad to wait, ma'am." - -That night Ollie had a strange nightmare. He dreamed that he was on -the operating table again, and that the doctors and nurses were once -more closing in on him. He opened his mouth to scream, but no sound -came out. And then the two interns were there, once more wearing their -uniforms. - -The female said, "It's all right. It's perfectly all right. We're just -removing the transfer switch. In the morning you won't even remember -what happened." - -And, in fact, in the morning he didn't. He had only a vague feeling -that something _had_ happened. - -They shook hands with him and they gave him a very fine letter of -reference, in case he tried to get another job, and Mrs. Zolto -presented him with an envelope in which there were several bills whose -size later made his eyes almost pop out of his head. - -He walked down the street as if it belonged to him, or were going to. -Gone was the slouch, gone the bleariness of the eyes, gone the hangdog -look. - -Gone was all memory of the dismal past. - -And then Ollie had a strange feeling. At first it seemed so peculiar -that he couldn't figure out what it was. It started in his stomach, -which seemed to turn over and almost tie itself into a knot. He felt a -twinge of pain and winced almost perceptibly. - -It took him several minutes to realize what it was. - -For the first time in months, he was hungry. - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Shipping Clerk, by William Morrison - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SHIPPING CLERK *** - -***** This file should be named 50796.txt or 50796.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/5/0/7/9/50796/ - -Produced by Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net - - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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