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+in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES.
+
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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #64640 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/64640)
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-The Project Gutenberg eBook of Machine Of Klamugra, by Allen K. Lang
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
-most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
-of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you
-will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before
-using this eBook.
-
-Title: Machine Of Klamugra
-
-Author: Allen K. Lang
-
-Release Date: February 26, 2021 [eBook #64640]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
-Produced by: Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online Distributed
- Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
-
-*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MACHINE OF KLAMUGRA ***
-
-
-
-
- Machine of KLAMUGRA
-
- By Allen K. Lang
-
- Captain Barnaby and Lieutenant Teajun stood
- at the brink of that vast stone amphitheater,
- staring wonderingly down at half-an-acre of
- gadget. This glittering mass of million-year
- clockwork was the Machine ... and soon it was
- to judge them for their crime against Mars!
-
- [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from
- Planet Stories November 1950.
- Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that
- the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]
-
-
-Klaggchallak, his fur nose-flaps pulled tight against his nostrils,
-stumbled up to the gleaming pinnacle of steel that seemed to offer
-shelter against the night. He felt a dust-storm gathering in the
-west, and knew that not even the tough skin of a Martian priest could
-withstand the angry whippings of sand lashed up by the wind-warlocks of
-the desert.
-
-The old priest drew a tiny, folded _mal_-skin tent from his back-pack.
-Without haste, for he knew that the elder gods of Mars were watching
-his safety, Klaggchallak pitched the tent against the west stabilizer
-of the rocket, drawing the tough hide down to form a floor-flap and
-fastening it to the steel of the stabilizer with tough _mal_-hoof glue,
-which would hold fast in the fiercest winds of Mars. He looked for the
-sun and found it low in the evening sky, then crawled leisurely into
-the yurt, pulling the door-flap down after him and gluing it to the
-floor. He had for himself a secure cocoon into which the sand-devils
-could not force their probing fingers. Before he slept, the old
-priest fingered his beads, reciting his evening invocation to various
-benevolent and protective gods.
-
-The falling sun threw a dancing star against the hull of the ship
-standing tall in its tail-chocks. A bewildering wail, the banshee-call
-of "Danger; ship jetting off!" sounded; but Klaggchallak slept on,
-hearing through his dreams only the howling of the wind.
-
-Sixty seconds later, as prescribed in the General Regulations of the
-Extraterrestrial Service, a second sound began, that most fearful of
-noises, the sirening of the rocket exhaust. The Martian in his skin
-tent wakened and felt fear gnaw at his bones; fear induced by subsonic
-tremors from the rocket blast. Klaggchallak reached for his beads as
-the heat soaked into his thick, wrinkled skin.
-
-In a moment the floor sagged beneath him. With the _mal_-skin pouch
-dangling ridiculously from its tail assembly, the EXTS rocket _Vulcan_
-rose with great gentleness from its tail-chocks, pushed up on its
-spraying jets.
-
-Four seconds later the ship was a ruby flame above the low hills. Eight
-seconds later a charred bipod, a bifurcated cinder, tumbled down from
-space to strike near the jetoff field, where the _Vulcan's_ tail-chocks
-glowed dull red and the blackened ground smoldered. A moment later a
-bracelet of blast-welded beads tumbled down from the sky, falling near
-the carbon hulk that a few seconds before had been Klaggchallak, a
-Martian priest great in wisdom and in honor among his people.
-
- * * * * *
-
-Captain Jan Barnaby and Lieutenant Kim Teajun of the Extraterrestrial
-Service stood before the Board of Inquiry at Denver, D. F. The
-President of the Board, a Chief Commander's star-on-silver gleaming at
-his right collar point, opened the proceedings:
-
-"The military rocket _Vulcan_, EXTS light cruiser, is accused by
-the Martian authorities of causing the death of one Klaggchallak, a
-priest. They further claim that the death of Klaggchallak was caused
-by criminal negligence on the part of the pilot and co-pilot of the
-rocket, Captain Jan Barnaby and Lieutenant Kim Teajun, respectively.
-Such neglect being within the definition of murder in the Martian legal
-code, the Judging Authority of Mars demands that we deliver these two
-men to them for trial and eventual punishment."
-
-The Commander stroked his grey hair thoughtfully as he looked up
-from his report to the two unhappy officers before him. "At ease,
-gentlemen." Barnaby and Teajun slumped. "While I'm inclined to agree
-with you two that Klaggchallak's frying was his own fool fault, I must
-say that you picked a damned poor time to become the instruments of his
-immolation. We had hoped to establish an extra-territoriality agreement
-with Mars, but the death of old Klaggchallak puts that out of the
-question. To further Martian tranquility, you men will have to return
-to Mars and face the Judging Authority there. If my feelings were all
-that is at stake, gentlemen, I'd tell the Marties to go trippingly to
-hell, and keep you here on Earth. But to do this would mean we'd be
-forced to abandon our bases and mines and surveys on all Mars. We'd be
-giving our European competitors a clear field." The Commander folded
-the report neatly, once and again. "Captain Barnaby and Lieutenant Kim,
-you'll be on the next Mars-ward ship. We can't help you if you're
-convicted by our fuzzy friends. You'll have to stay there and take
-whatever punishment they demand."
-
-Kim was remembering a scene he and Barnaby had witnessed at Klamugra,
-the seat of the Martian Judging Authority. A Martian, convicted of
-murder, was being executed atop a high metal platform. A large portion
-of the city's population was gathered before the platform, watching the
-edifying spectacle of a fellow-Martian dying with horrifying slowness
-as the chocks of a vise pressed into his skull. They were bearcats for
-gladiatorial amusement.
-
-"Do you gentlemen have any questions?"
-
-Lieutenant Kim glanced at Captain Barnaby, then spoke. "Yes, sir. I'd
-like to know how long we're going to let the Marties push us around
-this way. Thirteen Martian priests are on our payroll, just because
-they demand it. We've got to stay five kilometers away from their
-cities, or pay a five-hundred credit fine. We can't spit without
-special permission from the Grand Council of Mars. We don't think like
-they do; why should we submit to being judged by their million-year-old
-laws? In all respect, sir, why does our Service act so weak?"
-
-The Commander made a pyramid of thumbs and forefingers, and considered
-it. "Lieutenant Kim, I've been asking myself that question for the last
-ten years. We've had to pay tribute to gain the Marties' permission to
-stay on their god-forsaken planet. That tribute represents half the
-operating expense of the Martian Department of the Service, credits
-that should be spent on new ships and more men. We've behaved like a
-bunch of patsies ever since von Munger and Ley landed on Mars.
-
-"Still, we're all soldiers, and we must follow regulations. We mustn't
-disturb the indigenous population on Mars; that's Regulation 'A-1.'
-If our policies grow distasteful to the Marties, they may call in the
-Europeans to take our place. We wouldn't like that. It's bad form to
-admit it, gentlemen, but I'm ashamed to give you this order. You're
-to jet off for Mars tomorrow morning; and on arrival at Klamugra,
-to deliver yourselves over to the Martian Judging Authority." The
-Commander rapped his gavel and stood; the two officers before the Board
-snapped to attention. "Board of Inquiry dismissed."
-
- * * * * *
-
-Fully aware that tomorrow's jetoff would multiply by eight the
-hangovers they were breeding, Captain Barnaby and Lieutenant Kim sat
-that evening in the Denver Dive, alternating drinks of European vodka
-with rounds of California moon-dew. As Kim said: "Drink as much as you
-like, Barnaby; we're not driving in the morning."
-
-"Tell me," Barnaby demanded of his co-pilot, "what you're thinking of,
-you Martie-roasting fiend of a Korean."
-
-"I was considering the memory of the 'shlunk!' that Martian murderer's
-skull made when it finally gave in, that day at Klamugra. Do you
-remember, hard-headed Yankee?" Kim's eyes followed the blonde ecdysiast
-across the stage more from habit than present interest.
-
-"Why did you have to remember that? 'Shlunk!'--ugh!"
-
-"We're going to have to squirm out of this, Barnaby-_sunsang_," Kim
-said. "We'll have to beat that rap at Klamugra. It's not that I wish to
-avoid putting my head in a vise; it's only that it hurts me to see the
-Extraterrestrial Service made a monkey of this way. In a way it will
-even be a shame if we get off. Think of all the Marties who will miss
-the opportunity to see your punkin head smashed."
-
-"You orientals have noble souls, Kim."
-
-The blonde stripper, having uncovered as much of herself as she could
-without resorting to dissection, jumped down from the stage and walked
-over to the two EXTS officers. "Would you gentlemen like to buy me a
-drink?" she asked.
-
-Kim's eyes roved abroad in a brief anatomy lesson, but Barnaby said,
-"I'll buy you one a couple of weeks from now, if I'm not laid up
-somewhere with a splitting headache." He stood unsteadily and tossed a
-ten-credit certificate on the table. "If you're really thirsty, get a
-drink out of that."
-
-Kim reluctantly followed his superior officer from the bar. At the door
-he turned and called back to the blonde, "Don't catch cold, child. I'll
-be back."
-
- * * * * *
-
-The dawn jetoff was miserable, as jetoffs always are. Four days brought
-the ship within falling-distance of Mars; soon the jets thundered as it
-backed into a pocket of hills outside Klamugra. The air-pumps hammered
-to bring the air pressure inside the hull gradually down to that of
-the outside, so that instruments and equipment wouldn't be subjected
-to a sudden lowering of pressure. The men inside the ship slipped
-plastic helmets over their heads, checked the tiny air-pumps on their
-shoulders, and drew on heavy gloves and boots.
-
-When the port swung open Kim and Barnaby climbed down the ladder to the
-blast-blackened sand. The sergeant of EXTS Provost Marshall who had
-accompanied them walked with the officers to a hill overlooking the
-ancient Martian city of Klamugra, which stood on a terrace about five
-kilometers to the north. The red adobe walls of the city, testimony
-of the ancient days when Mars had enough water to allow its use for
-brick-making, blended with the distance to seem a part of the red
-desert sand.
-
-A cloud of steam and dust appeared between the hill where they stood
-and the city. Captain Barnaby un-leathered his binoculars and pressed
-them to the eyepieces of his helmet, and made out a hopping jeep, its
-top enclosed in plastic and a trio of supercharger coils poking through
-the sides of the hood. Clouds of steam followed the jeep as its exhaust
-streamed out into the chilly air.
-
- * * * * *
-
-In a moment the jeep spun up the hill and ground to a halt. There
-was a pause as the men inside the jeep fitted their helmets on their
-shoulders, checked their air-pumps, and drew on their gauntlets. Then
-the plastic bubble lifted back, a sergeant jumped out from under the
-steering wheel and saluted, and a Colonel, EXTS Intelligence, walked
-up to Captain Barnaby and Lieutenant Kim. "Gentlemen," he said, "I'm
-Colonel Lee Montgomery, Commanding Officer, Third Sector. It is my
-unpleasant duty to turn you over to the Chief Technician of the Martian
-Judging Authority, who is Rhinklav'n, here."
-
-At these words a tall Martian unfolded himself from the back seat
-of the jeep. He climbed out and bowed before Captain Barnaby. "I am
-Rhinklav'n, Captain." The thick fur nose-flaps, looking like ear-muffs
-pulled across his muzzle, muffled Rhinklav'n's high-pitched voice so
-that it gave the effect of coming from the bottom of a rain barrel.
-"You are to accompany me to Klamugra to be judged by the Machine, of
-which I am the Honored First Technician."
-
-Barnaby and Kim bowed slightly to acknowledge Rhinklav'n, then crawled
-into the back seat of the jeep, next to Colonel Montgomery.
-
-Rhinklav'n and the sergeant sat up front. The sergeant pushed a button
-on the instrument panel, and the plastic top of the jeep dropped down
-to cover them. As the engine started, the jeep's air-pump drew in air
-until the atmosphere was thick enough for human lungs. The Martian
-squirmed uncomfortably in the heavy air while his human companions
-threw off their helmets. Lieutenant Kim gratefully drew a deep breath
-of air, and regretted it immediately. What with the million-year water
-shortage the Martians had lost even the word for bath. Besides, the
-most popular article of Martian cuisine is a bulb strikingly similar
-to the terrestrial garlic plant. Captain Barnaby turned to Kim. "Mars
-has a distinguished atmosphere, hasn't it?" He spoke in English, rather
-than in the Esperanto lingua-franca of space.
-
-"Indeed it has," Kim agreed. "What was old fuzz-face up there talking
-about when he spoke of 'the Machine,' Colonel?"
-
-"The law of Mars is the most rigidly systematized in the solar system,"
-Colonel Montgomery replied. "Several millions of years ago, a bright
-Martie got the idea that it was unwise to trust mortal judges with
-a problem so important as the sentencing of criminals. So he called
-in a lot of mechanics--ancient Mars had some pretty fair engineers,
-though they never discovered electricity--and had them build a
-judging-machine. Since the climate is right and the machine was built
-of a stainless steel, it's still here and still being used. It's an
-enormous thing; spreads over half-an-acre in a big amphitheatre in the
-center of town. It's an analogue computer, rather clumsy by terrestrial
-standards, but nevertheless well-built. You know the principles of
-analogue calculators. Instead of working with coded, position-valued
-impulses, like the electronic astrogator on our rockets, the mechanical
-machines solve problems by making use of the physical analogies between
-cogs and gears and differentials."
-
-"Do you mean that we're going to be punished or set free by a bunch of
-clockwork, colonel?" Kim asked.
-
-"In a way, yes. The Machine is a most impersonal judge. That fact won't
-help you, though. Martian legal code is strict about killing, there
-being some thirty-odd degrees of murder, ranging in seriousness from a
-'simple homicide to secure a mate,' the punishment for which is death
-by dehydration, most often; to 'killing to secure for oneself material
-benefits,' for which there exist more subtle forms of death by torture."
-
-"Like getting a small-head-size in a vise?" Captain Barnaby grunted.
-
-"That's the usual punishment for murder in the seventeenth degree,
-where the crime is usually 'killing for spiritual advancement.' You
-see, each crime is given special study by the Machine. A great many
-factors are fed in, collated with certain constants within the Machine,
-processed through several dozen stages, and finally combined into a
-single number, which represents the punishment called for. By the way,"
-the colonel studied the back of Rhinklav'n's head, "no consideration
-of the truthfulness of the 'defendant' is entered into the Machine. It
-is presumed that should a man say that he did not commit a crime, he
-didn't; if he did, he'd admit it. Martians have a peculiar character
-defect that prevents them from lying."
-
-"A defect from which we humans are fortunately free," Kim grinned.
-
-"That's no out," Colonel Montgomery countered. "They have witnesses who
-saw Klaggchallak fry. Besides, we prefer to have the mass of Marties
-ignorant of the average earthling's penchant for prevarication. It
-saves the Service a lot of money not to have to prove anything it tells
-our hairy hosts out here."
-
- * * * * *
-
-The jeep hit the first of the series of low terraces which set the
-city of Klamugra up from the surrounding desert plains, and the little
-car bounced high off the sand. Colonel Montgomery looked startled, as
-though he'd just remembered something. "You know, in my ethnological
-fervor I didn't realize what you two men are in for. Cosmos! I'm
-practically delivering you up as human sacrifices!"
-
-"We came to that conclusion five days ago, colonel," Lieutenant Kim
-dryly observed.
-
-"I can see what the Fleet Commander meant when he said that he was
-giving me 'a most unpleasant assignment.' Hell, I don't think the
-Machine is able to give a judgment of 'not guilty'." Colonel Montgomery
-gazed toward the city they were approaching. "We've got to turn you
-in. We can't risk a blowup with the Martian Grand Council. There are
-rumors that ..." the colonel glanced again with suspicion at the back
-of Rhinklav'n's hairy neck, as though suspecting that the Martian might
-be able to puzzle out the meaning of their conversation, though it was
-in English. "There are rumors that the -artiansMay have an agent among
-the -ussiansRay. We can't risk having the borsch-eaters more popular
-out here than the Western Powers." The jeep bounded up the last of the
-terraces and through an opening in the city wall. The adobe buildings
-raced past, and with a final bound the jeep came to the edge of the
-huge, circular bowl which held the Machine.
-
-"There's your judge," Colonel Montgomery said, speaking in Esperanto
-again. "I haven't much hope to offer you. For one thing, you're the
-first humans ever to be judged by the Machine."
-
-The men picked up their helmets and air-pumps and adjusted them on
-their shoulders. Rhinklav'n drew his furry nostril-flaps down into
-place against the sudden change in pressure. The plastic top of the
-jeep flew back on its springs and the men climbed out, stretching their
-cramped muscles. The radiophones in the helmets buzzed, and the colonel
-gave Captain Barnaby a last word. "I want to impress you with the fact
-that the Service cannot protect you, from this moment onward. If you
-escape being killed it must be on your own merits. And don't start
-shooting Marties--won't do you a bit of good. There's a lot at stake
-for Earth here. Good luck, men!" Colonel Montgomery saluted, and he and
-his sergeant jumped back in the jeep, slammed the top down, and whirled
-away.
-
-Rhinklav'n turned to the two EXTS officers. "Gentlemen, I've assigned
-you quarters here, near the Machine. Will you follow me?" Kim and
-Barnaby followed the Martian a short distance from the edge of the
-amphitheater to a lone adobe building, one story high and about ten
-meters square. "Here are your quarters, where you'll stay tonight. Your
-judging is set for tomorrow morning."
-
-Captain Barnaby glanced into the building and was surprised to see
-that it closed with an airlock, had terrestrial canned foods on
-neat shelves, and had regular Service cots in place of the rough
-_mal_-leather mats that the Martians slept on. "It was good of you to
-go to all this trouble just for myself and Lieutenant Kim, Rhinklav'n,"
-the Captain said.
-
-The Martian paused at the door. "It's not just for you, Captain. Five
-other terrestrials have committed crimes of various proportions within
-the last few weeks. They will also be tried here, after your case is
-disposed of." Rhinklav'n left, considerately closing the airlock door
-and starting the pump on his way out.
-
-Lieutenant Kim took a can of "B" ration beans down from the shelf and
-thoughtfully began to open it with his Service knife. "Captain," he
-said, "this sort of thing could drive our Service from Mars. If the
-Marties consider it their right to judge every Earthling who runs a
-jeep into a farmer's _mal_ or lands half a meter too near one of their
-cities, we won't have a man on the planet in a couple of years."
-
-"Kim, we're precedents."
-
-"What do you mean, Yankee?"
-
-"If the Marties succeed in convicting us of murder in some unheard-of
-degree by using that overgrown Erector Set of theirs, we'll be only
-the first two of a long string of EXTServicemen to be executed under
-Mars law. We can't let them do it." Captain Barnaby paused a moment
-to pour himself out a plateful of beans. "Kim, what was that process
-you used to rely on back in EXTS Academy in Denver? The one that gave
-you the right answers after you found that your first solutions to our
-astrogation problems were a few hundred thousand kilometers off?"
-
-Kim stopped chewing for a moment in surprise. "You mean that you got
-through the Academy without using the 'finagle factor'? No wonder you
-made captain so soon. It's simple: I'd look up the right answer in the
-Service charts, find by what factor my solution was off, and introduce
-that factor into my next calculation, making it inconspicuous under a
-lot of mathematical camouflage. Don't bawl me out about it, Barny; I
-just couldn't see letting my extracurricular activities suffer for my
-schoolwork."
-
-"Yes, you did a lot of your studying at the Denver Dive. No matter,
-little man. Eat hearty and get some sleep." Barnaby stirred his beans
-thoughtfully. "We've got a big day ahead of us tomorrow."
-
- * * * * *
-
-Early the next morning a subordinate technician of the Machine hammered
-on the airlock. The two terrestrials pulled on their heavy jackets, fur
-boots, and gauntlets, started the little air-pumps on their shoulders,
-and opened the lock. "The honored First Technician of the Machine
-invites your presence at your trial, which is to begin very soon," the
-Martian said, speaking halting Esperanto. Kim and Barnaby followed him
-to the edge of the Machine bowl. There had been several changes made
-during the night. An elevated platform had been set up, identical to
-the one used in the bloody execution they'd witnessed. About twenty
-Martians were clustered around the Machine, some of them making
-last-minute adjustments in the mechanism; others, evidently sightseers,
-gazing curiously at the two principals in the trial.
-
-Rhinklav'n was waiting, his nose-flaps drawn over his nostrils to keep
-the cold morning air from cutting into his lungs. "I am pleased that
-you come," he said. "The Machine is fully assembled for your problem."
-He pointed down toward the Machine, a vast cluster of separate stages
-connected by rods. "On the far right, in that small building, is the
-power source of the Machine, a mercury-turbine engine. We can't spare
-the water to make steam, you know. The first stage contains the Martian
-actuarial tables, the second has the actuarial system for determining
-the probable life-spans of you two Earthlings. That's without taking
-into consideration the probability that you two will be executed as a
-result of the judgement of the Machine."
-
-Lieutenant Kim nodded. "Most ingenious. But I'm afraid that there's a
-factor that you've omitted."
-
-"We've made no factual error, Lieutenant," Rhinklav'n insisted. "The
-value of the sage Klaggchallak is represented there--" he pointed to
-the fourth stage, "and your social value to the people of Mars is here
-represented." Rhinklav'n waved one mitten-like hand toward the fifth
-stage. "If you'll examine that stage, you'll observe that your value is
-negative: the shaft representing it revolves in a direction opposite to
-that of the others. Yes, you'll surely be executed."
-
-Captain Barnaby nodded, as though the reiteration of the probability
-of his early demise troubled him less than the philosophical question
-he'd stumbled across. "Still, as my subordinate officer has said,
-there's a factor which you seem to have omitted. In the terminology of
-terrestrial psychometering, this quantity is called--what did you say
-it was, Lieutenant Kim?"
-
-"The 'finagle factor,' sir."
-
-"Really?" Rhinklav'n asked, the light of scientific inquiry in his
-eyes. "I thought I'd taken all the variables of Earthling physiology
-and psychology into consideration when I set up the plans for the
-trial. What are the mathematics of this 'finagle factor'?"
-
- * * * * *
-
-Captain Barnaby put one foot up on a connecting shaft, as though he
-were in the Denver Dive, discussing the relative merits of two video
-dancers. "As you've doubtless noticed in your extensive study of the
-Terrestrial mind, Sir Honored First Technician of the Machine, we of
-Earth place almost equal value on a man's intelligence and on his
-financial standing as criteria of his worth."
-
-"Yes," Rhinklav'n mused, "I noticed your preoccupation with both
-intelligence (a minor mental quality, by the way; far inferior to
-spiritual insight or time-sense) and with the individual's possession
-of Western Credits."
-
-"As I said," Captain Barnaby continued, "there exists a precise
-formula, developed by the...."
-
-"By the Noyoudont Dentifrice Laboratories," Kim supplied.
-
-"Yes; their laboratories developed the mathematics of the finagle
-factor. Briefly, it is this: the square root of the product of
-Intelligence Quotient over one hundred times the number of credits the
-individual has outstanding. Or, written algebraically:" Barnaby knelt
-down and traced in the sand with his gloved index finger:
-
-[sqrt](IQ/100 x money in the bank)
-
-"Quite a simple equation, easily represented on the Machine,"
-Rhinklav'n observed. He called a subordinate technician to his side and
-spoke to him in the clicking polysyllables of the Martian language.
-Turning again to Captain Barnaby, he asked, "And what are the values of
-'IQ' and 'Money in the Bank' for you and Lieutenant Kim?"
-
-"Our combined IQs total about 243. How many credits do you own,
-Lieutenant Kim?"
-
-"Hell, sir; I've got more debts than credits."
-
-"Figure up your debts then, Lieutenant."
-
-Kim raised his right gauntlet, drew a pad of paper and a pencil from a
-pocket at the back of his hand, and scribbled rapidly. "If we get out
-of this, Captain, I'll owe about 1046 credits. Subtracting pay due for
-the last semi-annual period, I owe 437 credits."
-
-"And I have debts totaling 600 credits," Captain Barnaby said
-thoughtfully. He turned to Rhinklav'n. "The debts of myself and
-Lieutenant Kim, Sir Honored First Technician of the Machine, total 1037
-Western Credits. Being debt, that's a negative number, of course."
-
-"Of course, Captain," Rhinklav'n agreed. "The Machine can handle any
-sort of number, even a negative number. You noticed that your social
-value to Mars was easily represented as a minus-number." Rhinklav'n
-talked rapidly to his assistant and handed him the values of the
-finagle factor, rewritten in Martian ideographs. He faced Captain
-Barnaby again. "It will take us about an hour to enter this new factor
-into the Machine," he said. "You'll not mind waiting?"
-
-"No, not at all," Barnaby murmured. He and Kim leaned against the
-inside wall of the amphitheater, watching the Martian technicians hurry
-about; they removed gears and replaced them with gears of another
-ratio; they connected a stage consisting of eccentric cams strung on
-shafts; and they installed a mass of machinery at the sixth stage,
-where the operation of extracting square root was to take place. Kim,
-comparing the heavy gears and levers of the Machine with the compact
-tubes of his electronic astrogator, remarked, "It's like using a trip
-hammer to crack a walnut."
-
- * * * * *
-
-After a few minutes of watching, Kim and Barnaby became conscious of an
-intruder within their helmets, a most unpleasant odor. They glanced up
-to the edge of the bowl. The Martian sightseers were sitting up there,
-dangling their legs above the Machine and utilizing the pause in the
-proceedings to eat their picnic lunches. They were busily unwrapping
-bundles of food from the _mal_-skin pouches hanging by their sides and
-eating as they watched the technicians work over the Machine.
-
-One of the tourists, judging from his height a young male, threw a
-small parcel toward Kim. The lieutenant picked it up and unwrapped it.
-The stench of Martian garlic became unbearable as Kim stared at the
-unidentifiable tidbit of meat the Martian had thrown him; the air-pump
-on his shoulder drew the redolence into his helmet in such quantities
-that Kim's eyes burned. He gestured to show that, while his every
-instinct demanded that he eat the delicious morsel, he couldn't take
-his helmet off to do so. With an elaborate pantomiming of sorrow, Kim
-pitched the gift back up to the Martian boy.
-
-A few adjustments later the technicians filed up from the Machine pit.
-Rhinklav'n walked over to the two EXTS officers. "If you gentlemen will
-accompany me, we'll begin the trial at once."
-
-Kim and Barnaby walked together up the steps that led from the Machine,
-then turned and looked down at the dozens of stages of complex
-machinery, into which memory and intelligence of a sort had been built.
-Rhinklav'n pointed toward the fifth and sixth stages. "It is there
-that the combined finagle factors of you men will be calculated. The
-fifth stage is quite simple; it will perform the necessary division and
-multiplication. The sixth stage will extract the square root of the
-product derived by the fifth. The next six stages of machinery contain
-the variables of terrestrial behavior, which I and my colleagues
-calculated from Earth texts. The other stages on the field, fifty-three
-of them, will collate the results of the calculations of the first
-twelve stages with our legal code and determine punishment. The final
-product will appear at the sixty-seventh stage, represented as the
-speed of rotation of a single shaft. The revolutions-per-time-interval
-are decoded by a simple formula to determine the punishment to be
-levied upon you. Doubtless, it will be some unpleasant form of death."
-
-Kim muttered that he wished that Martians had a bit more tact.
-
-Rhinklav'n waved a hairy arm toward his assistant who had remained
-below in the Machine pit; and that Martian ran to the power house
-to start the mercury-turbine engine that ran the Machine. With a
-whistling that set the thin atmosphere trembling for miles around, the
-turbine began to turn.
-
-The sightseers on the edge of the amphitheater wrapped up the scraps of
-their lunches, replaced them in their _mal_-skin picnic hampers, and
-stood up to watch the Machine. Kim and Barnaby paced up and down along
-the edge of the bowl, looking down upon the mechanical cerebration
-being performed by the huge Machine. With a smooth transfer of power
-from one stage to the next, the first problem--the probable duration
-of Klaggchallak's life when it had been interrupted by the jets of the
-_Vulcan_--was solved, and the mechanism of the second stage began to
-revolve.
-
-"They're seeing how long we can be expected to live, now," Captain
-Barnaby commented.
-
-That problem fled through a mass of gears and cams; and the partial
-solution, the sum of the two earthling's life expectancies divided by
-that of the priest Klaggchallak, ran across a shaft to the third stage,
-which would determine the old priest's value to the society of Mars.
-On into the fourth stage the problem flowed, to combine all previous
-factors with the earthlings' social value to Mars, a negative number.
-
-In a few moments the problem had progressed to the fifth stage of the
-Machine, where the first steps of the 'finagle factor' were solved. The
-product, a negative number as could be seen by the reversed rotation of
-the main shaft, bowed into the sixth stage, which was to extract square
-root.
-
- * * * * *
-
-The turbine howled protest as it was forced to overcome the inertia of
-the sixth stage; but a governor at the input stage held the shaft-speed
-constant. The seventh stage, all ready for the problem when it should
-appear from the sixth, held all the computations of the first four
-stages in its smoothly-turning entrails. The initial portion of the
-sixth stage began to move slowly.
-
-There was a sudden, grating noise as the feed-in gear of the fifth
-stage came in contact with a solution gear of the sixth which refused
-to move. The whine of the mercury-turbine engine was shaking the ground
-beneath the two officers' feet now.
-
-As the Martian technicians and picnickers looked on in amazement,
-the shaft between the fifth stage and the sixth began to twist like
-a stick of moist putty. The sixth stage strained and shuddered, then
-followed the twisting shaft over, tearing its moorings from the ground
-and smashing upside-down. The seventh stage entered into the chaos,
-ripping out anchors of steel-in-concrete and slamming onto its side.
-In a moment all the machines in the bowl were muttering and straining
-against the earth. Rhinklav'n ran to the stairway that led down into
-the pit. In the adobe powerhouse the mercury engine was whirling at
-twenty times its optimum rate, tearing the atmosphere with the sound of
-its screaming power. There was the rattle of shrapnel exploding within
-the walls of the powerhouse as the turbine threw off the restrainment
-of its governor. The whole field within the bowl was a mass of
-twitching clockwork, shaken by the final stormings of the suicidal
-turbine. Bars of shining steel twisted and snapped, gear teeth flew
-singing through the thin air. The final chain of stages tore itself
-loose from anchoring and crashed to its side. There was a final roar of
-defiance from the turbine, and the powerhouse walls dissolved before
-an out-rushing blast of superheated mercury. Kim and Barnaby threw
-themselves to the ground as the din increased for a moment, and the
-Martian sightseers sought refuge behind nearby buildings. Suddenly, the
-Machine was silent, except for the tinkle of scraps of metal falling to
-the cement.
-
-[Illustration: _Bars of shining steel twisted and snapped, gear teeth
-flew singing through the thin air...._]
-
-"Looks as though we were too much for judge, jury, and D.A.," Kim
-murmured into his radiophone. Barnaby nodded, then cautiously climbed
-to his feet.
-
-Rhinklav'n climbed back up the stairway to the brink of the
-amphitheater-become-junkyard. He shoved his way through the questioning
-crowd of Martian sightseers without a word. "Looks like he's going to
-cry," Lieutenant Kim commented into his radiophone. True, Rhinklav'n's
-nose-flaps were hanging limply down below his chin, a sure sign of
-great emotion in a Martian.
-
-Rhinklav'n faced Captain Barnaby wordlessly for a moment. "You may
-leave now," he said at last. The Martian turned his back on the captain
-to look down again on the wreck that had been his beloved Machine.
-
- * * * * *
-
-The two EXTS officers wandered about Klamugra, the cynosure of all
-Martian eyes, though no one tried to stop them or ask them questions.
-Lieutenant Kim finally spotted a radio tower jutting up above the
-red adobe buildings. Hurrying in the direction of the tower, Kim and
-Barnaby found the Klamugra headquarters of the Extraterrestrial Service.
-
-Colonel Montgomery jumped to his feet as they came in, a look of bald
-disbelief on his face. "Man, I'm glad to see you two! I was about to
-storm out like a knight in shiny armor and save you from the Marties."
-He waved his hand toward the helmet and rifle lying on his typewriter
-table--"If I'd gotten there too late, I'd have ruptured interplanetary
-friendship for sure!"--and indicated a decanter on his desk. "Have
-some: that's Edinbourgh scotch, not Los Angeles moon-dew. Tell me why
-I happen to be talking to you now instead of making up a couple of
-packages for your next-of-kin."
-
-"We wrecked their damn Machine," Kim said happily, dropping his helmet
-and gauntlets to the floor and measuring out several fingers of the
-colonel's scotch into his ration can.
-
-"To be a bit more accurate," Captain Barnaby corrected, "we drove the
-Machine insane." He poured himself a stiff shot of scotch and downed it
-with appreciation.
-
-"Our personalities are so complex that the Machine blew up all over
-the landscape when it tried to understand them," Kim said. He dragged
-a chair out from behind the typewriter table and sat down, carefully
-balancing the ration can.
-
-"It's rather as though we should set our electronic astrogator to work
-on a problem with three variables in five dimensions, rather than in
-four," Captain Barnaby explained. "As you told us, the Machine was a
-mechanical-analogus calculator. It can multiply, divide, add, square
-and cube, and extract roots. It performs these operations by coding
-numbers into mechanical relationships."
-
-"Just a big adding machine," Kim commented irreverently.
-
-"And our 'finagle factor' was too much for a mechanical system."
-Captain Barnaby briefly explained to the colonel how he and Kim had
-induced Rhinklav'n to add their invented factor to the Machine's setup.
-"You see, the finagle factor resolved itself into the square root of a
-negative number. An electronic calculator, like our astrogator, could
-extract the root of a minus-number: 'imaginary' numbers of this sort
-are implicit in its circuit. The Martian Machine out there couldn't do
-this though. Since there is no mechanical analogue for an imaginary
-number, the Machine tried to extract the square root of our finagle
-factor in the same manner in which it would attempt to extract the root
-of a real number."
-
-Kim drained, his ration can neatly and remarked, "The Machine couldn't
-do what it had to. All the power of the turbine was thrown into the
-root extracting system, which wouldn't revolve. So the Machine went
-nuts, pardon me, sir, and blew its top. Wrecked the power source and
-all sixty-seven stages. With the square root of minus one, we busted
-up a Machine half a million years old."
-
-"What now?" Colonel Montgomery asked, rhetorically.
-
-Captain Barnaby studied the bottom of his ration can a moment. "Well,
-sir, Rhinklav'n was more puzzled, than angered. He wanted to judge
-humans not out of malice, but from a genuine scientific curiosity. He
-wanted to see how the Machine would act with an alien problem. His
-Machine is too badly broken-up ever to repair. He'll have to find
-another method of judging criminals, first of all. Martian society is
-founded on strict law."
-
-"Just a moment." The colonel got up from his desk and went down the
-hall to a door marked "Judge Advocate General's Department, EXTS." He
-returned with a heavy book, bound between khaki-board covers. "We'll
-give this book to Rhinklav'n, and you gentlemen may return to the
-Denver Joint."
-
-"Dive, sir," Kim corrected.
-
-"Yes, Lieutenant." Colonel Montgomery handed the big book to Captain
-Barnaby. "Take this to Rhinklav'n before you leave, Captain."
-
-Barnaby turned to the title page and read in Esperanto, "Blackstone.
-_On the Study of Law._"
-
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-<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: Machine Of Klamugra</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: Allen K. Lang</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: February 26, 2021 [eBook #64640]</div>
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-
-<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MACHINE OF KLAMUGRA ***</div>
-
-<div class="titlepage">
-
-<h1>Machine of KLAMUGRA</h1>
-
-<h2>By Allen K. Lang</h2>
-
-<p>Captain Barnaby and Lieutenant Teajun stood<br />
-at the brink of that vast stone amphitheater,<br />
-staring wonderingly down at half-an-acre of<br />
-gadget. This glittering mass of million-year<br />
-clockwork was the Machine ... and soon it was<br />
-to judge them for their crime against Mars!</p>
-
-<p>[Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from<br />
-Planet Stories November 1950.<br />
-Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that<br />
-the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]</p>
-
-</div>
-
-<hr class="chap" />
-
-<p>Klaggchallak, his fur nose-flaps pulled tight against his nostrils,
-stumbled up to the gleaming pinnacle of steel that seemed to offer
-shelter against the night. He felt a dust-storm gathering in the
-west, and knew that not even the tough skin of a Martian priest could
-withstand the angry whippings of sand lashed up by the wind-warlocks of
-the desert.</p>
-
-<p>The old priest drew a tiny, folded <i>mal</i>-skin tent from his back-pack.
-Without haste, for he knew that the elder gods of Mars were watching
-his safety, Klaggchallak pitched the tent against the west stabilizer
-of the rocket, drawing the tough hide down to form a floor-flap and
-fastening it to the steel of the stabilizer with tough <i>mal</i>-hoof glue,
-which would hold fast in the fiercest winds of Mars. He looked for the
-sun and found it low in the evening sky, then crawled leisurely into
-the yurt, pulling the door-flap down after him and gluing it to the
-floor. He had for himself a secure cocoon into which the sand-devils
-could not force their probing fingers. Before he slept, the old
-priest fingered his beads, reciting his evening invocation to various
-benevolent and protective gods.</p>
-
-<p>The falling sun threw a dancing star against the hull of the ship
-standing tall in its tail-chocks. A bewildering wail, the banshee-call
-of "Danger; ship jetting off!" sounded; but Klaggchallak slept on,
-hearing through his dreams only the howling of the wind.</p>
-
-<p>Sixty seconds later, as prescribed in the General Regulations of the
-Extraterrestrial Service, a second sound began, that most fearful of
-noises, the sirening of the rocket exhaust. The Martian in his skin
-tent wakened and felt fear gnaw at his bones; fear induced by subsonic
-tremors from the rocket blast. Klaggchallak reached for his beads as
-the heat soaked into his thick, wrinkled skin.</p>
-
-<p>In a moment the floor sagged beneath him. With the <i>mal</i>-skin pouch
-dangling ridiculously from its tail assembly, the EXTS rocket <i>Vulcan</i>
-rose with great gentleness from its tail-chocks, pushed up on its
-spraying jets.</p>
-
-<p>Four seconds later the ship was a ruby flame above the low hills. Eight
-seconds later a charred bipod, a bifurcated cinder, tumbled down from
-space to strike near the jetoff field, where the <i>Vulcan's</i> tail-chocks
-glowed dull red and the blackened ground smoldered. A moment later a
-bracelet of blast-welded beads tumbled down from the sky, falling near
-the carbon hulk that a few seconds before had been Klaggchallak, a
-Martian priest great in wisdom and in honor among his people.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>Captain Jan Barnaby and Lieutenant Kim Teajun of the Extraterrestrial
-Service stood before the Board of Inquiry at Denver, D. F. The
-President of the Board, a Chief Commander's star-on-silver gleaming at
-his right collar point, opened the proceedings:</p>
-
-<p>"The military rocket <i>Vulcan</i>, EXTS light cruiser, is accused by
-the Martian authorities of causing the death of one Klaggchallak, a
-priest. They further claim that the death of Klaggchallak was caused
-by criminal negligence on the part of the pilot and co-pilot of the
-rocket, Captain Jan Barnaby and Lieutenant Kim Teajun, respectively.
-Such neglect being within the definition of murder in the Martian legal
-code, the Judging Authority of Mars demands that we deliver these two
-men to them for trial and eventual punishment."</p>
-
-<p>The Commander stroked his grey hair thoughtfully as he looked up
-from his report to the two unhappy officers before him. "At ease,
-gentlemen." Barnaby and Teajun slumped. "While I'm inclined to agree
-with you two that Klaggchallak's frying was his own fool fault, I must
-say that you picked a damned poor time to become the instruments of his
-immolation. We had hoped to establish an extra-territoriality agreement
-with Mars, but the death of old Klaggchallak puts that out of the
-question. To further Martian tranquility, you men will have to return
-to Mars and face the Judging Authority there. If my feelings were all
-that is at stake, gentlemen, I'd tell the Marties to go trippingly to
-hell, and keep you here on Earth. But to do this would mean we'd be
-forced to abandon our bases and mines and surveys on all Mars. We'd be
-giving our European competitors a clear field." The Commander folded
-the report neatly, once and again. "Captain Barnaby and Lieutenant Kim,
-you'll be on the next Mars-ward ship. We can't help you if you're
-convicted by our fuzzy friends. You'll have to stay there and take
-whatever punishment they demand."</p>
-
-<p>Kim was remembering a scene he and Barnaby had witnessed at Klamugra,
-the seat of the Martian Judging Authority. A Martian, convicted of
-murder, was being executed atop a high metal platform. A large portion
-of the city's population was gathered before the platform, watching the
-edifying spectacle of a fellow-Martian dying with horrifying slowness
-as the chocks of a vise pressed into his skull. They were bearcats for
-gladiatorial amusement.</p>
-
-<p>"Do you gentlemen have any questions?"</p>
-
-<p>Lieutenant Kim glanced at Captain Barnaby, then spoke. "Yes, sir. I'd
-like to know how long we're going to let the Marties push us around
-this way. Thirteen Martian priests are on our payroll, just because
-they demand it. We've got to stay five kilometers away from their
-cities, or pay a five-hundred credit fine. We can't spit without
-special permission from the Grand Council of Mars. We don't think like
-they do; why should we submit to being judged by their million-year-old
-laws? In all respect, sir, why does our Service act so weak?"</p>
-
-<p>The Commander made a pyramid of thumbs and forefingers, and considered
-it. "Lieutenant Kim, I've been asking myself that question for the last
-ten years. We've had to pay tribute to gain the Marties' permission to
-stay on their god-forsaken planet. That tribute represents half the
-operating expense of the Martian Department of the Service, credits
-that should be spent on new ships and more men. We've behaved like a
-bunch of patsies ever since von Munger and Ley landed on Mars.</p>
-
-<p>"Still, we're all soldiers, and we must follow regulations. We mustn't
-disturb the indigenous population on Mars; that's Regulation 'A-1.'
-If our policies grow distasteful to the Marties, they may call in the
-Europeans to take our place. We wouldn't like that. It's bad form to
-admit it, gentlemen, but I'm ashamed to give you this order. You're
-to jet off for Mars tomorrow morning; and on arrival at Klamugra,
-to deliver yourselves over to the Martian Judging Authority." The
-Commander rapped his gavel and stood; the two officers before the Board
-snapped to attention. "Board of Inquiry dismissed."</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>Fully aware that tomorrow's jetoff would multiply by eight the
-hangovers they were breeding, Captain Barnaby and Lieutenant Kim sat
-that evening in the Denver Dive, alternating drinks of European vodka
-with rounds of California moon-dew. As Kim said: "Drink as much as you
-like, Barnaby; we're not driving in the morning."</p>
-
-<p>"Tell me," Barnaby demanded of his co-pilot, "what you're thinking of,
-you Martie-roasting fiend of a Korean."</p>
-
-<p>"I was considering the memory of the 'shlunk!' that Martian murderer's
-skull made when it finally gave in, that day at Klamugra. Do you
-remember, hard-headed Yankee?" Kim's eyes followed the blonde ecdysiast
-across the stage more from habit than present interest.</p>
-
-<p>"Why did you have to remember that? 'Shlunk!'&mdash;ugh!"</p>
-
-<p>"We're going to have to squirm out of this, Barnaby-<i>sunsang</i>," Kim
-said. "We'll have to beat that rap at Klamugra. It's not that I wish to
-avoid putting my head in a vise; it's only that it hurts me to see the
-Extraterrestrial Service made a monkey of this way. In a way it will
-even be a shame if we get off. Think of all the Marties who will miss
-the opportunity to see your punkin head smashed."</p>
-
-<p>"You orientals have noble souls, Kim."</p>
-
-<p>The blonde stripper, having uncovered as much of herself as she could
-without resorting to dissection, jumped down from the stage and walked
-over to the two EXTS officers. "Would you gentlemen like to buy me a
-drink?" she asked.</p>
-
-<p>Kim's eyes roved abroad in a brief anatomy lesson, but Barnaby said,
-"I'll buy you one a couple of weeks from now, if I'm not laid up
-somewhere with a splitting headache." He stood unsteadily and tossed a
-ten-credit certificate on the table. "If you're really thirsty, get a
-drink out of that."</p>
-
-<p>Kim reluctantly followed his superior officer from the bar. At the door
-he turned and called back to the blonde, "Don't catch cold, child. I'll
-be back."</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>The dawn jetoff was miserable, as jetoffs always are. Four days brought
-the ship within falling-distance of Mars; soon the jets thundered as it
-backed into a pocket of hills outside Klamugra. The air-pumps hammered
-to bring the air pressure inside the hull gradually down to that of
-the outside, so that instruments and equipment wouldn't be subjected
-to a sudden lowering of pressure. The men inside the ship slipped
-plastic helmets over their heads, checked the tiny air-pumps on their
-shoulders, and drew on heavy gloves and boots.</p>
-
-<p>When the port swung open Kim and Barnaby climbed down the ladder to the
-blast-blackened sand. The sergeant of EXTS Provost Marshall who had
-accompanied them walked with the officers to a hill overlooking the
-ancient Martian city of Klamugra, which stood on a terrace about five
-kilometers to the north. The red adobe walls of the city, testimony
-of the ancient days when Mars had enough water to allow its use for
-brick-making, blended with the distance to seem a part of the red
-desert sand.</p>
-
-<p>A cloud of steam and dust appeared between the hill where they stood
-and the city. Captain Barnaby un-leathered his binoculars and pressed
-them to the eyepieces of his helmet, and made out a hopping jeep, its
-top enclosed in plastic and a trio of supercharger coils poking through
-the sides of the hood. Clouds of steam followed the jeep as its exhaust
-streamed out into the chilly air.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>In a moment the jeep spun up the hill and ground to a halt. There
-was a pause as the men inside the jeep fitted their helmets on their
-shoulders, checked their air-pumps, and drew on their gauntlets. Then
-the plastic bubble lifted back, a sergeant jumped out from under the
-steering wheel and saluted, and a Colonel, EXTS Intelligence, walked
-up to Captain Barnaby and Lieutenant Kim. "Gentlemen," he said, "I'm
-Colonel Lee Montgomery, Commanding Officer, Third Sector. It is my
-unpleasant duty to turn you over to the Chief Technician of the Martian
-Judging Authority, who is Rhinklav'n, here."</p>
-
-<p>At these words a tall Martian unfolded himself from the back seat
-of the jeep. He climbed out and bowed before Captain Barnaby. "I am
-Rhinklav'n, Captain." The thick fur nose-flaps, looking like ear-muffs
-pulled across his muzzle, muffled Rhinklav'n's high-pitched voice so
-that it gave the effect of coming from the bottom of a rain barrel.
-"You are to accompany me to Klamugra to be judged by the Machine, of
-which I am the Honored First Technician."</p>
-
-<p>Barnaby and Kim bowed slightly to acknowledge Rhinklav'n, then crawled
-into the back seat of the jeep, next to Colonel Montgomery.</p>
-
-<p>Rhinklav'n and the sergeant sat up front. The sergeant pushed a button
-on the instrument panel, and the plastic top of the jeep dropped down
-to cover them. As the engine started, the jeep's air-pump drew in air
-until the atmosphere was thick enough for human lungs. The Martian
-squirmed uncomfortably in the heavy air while his human companions
-threw off their helmets. Lieutenant Kim gratefully drew a deep breath
-of air, and regretted it immediately. What with the million-year water
-shortage the Martians had lost even the word for bath. Besides, the
-most popular article of Martian cuisine is a bulb strikingly similar
-to the terrestrial garlic plant. Captain Barnaby turned to Kim. "Mars
-has a distinguished atmosphere, hasn't it?" He spoke in English, rather
-than in the Esperanto lingua-franca of space.</p>
-
-<p>"Indeed it has," Kim agreed. "What was old fuzz-face up there talking
-about when he spoke of 'the Machine,' Colonel?"</p>
-
-<p>"The law of Mars is the most rigidly systematized in the solar system,"
-Colonel Montgomery replied. "Several millions of years ago, a bright
-Martie got the idea that it was unwise to trust mortal judges with
-a problem so important as the sentencing of criminals. So he called
-in a lot of mechanics&mdash;ancient Mars had some pretty fair engineers,
-though they never discovered electricity&mdash;and had them build a
-judging-machine. Since the climate is right and the machine was built
-of a stainless steel, it's still here and still being used. It's an
-enormous thing; spreads over half-an-acre in a big amphitheatre in the
-center of town. It's an analogue computer, rather clumsy by terrestrial
-standards, but nevertheless well-built. You know the principles of
-analogue calculators. Instead of working with coded, position-valued
-impulses, like the electronic astrogator on our rockets, the mechanical
-machines solve problems by making use of the physical analogies between
-cogs and gears and differentials."</p>
-
-<p>"Do you mean that we're going to be punished or set free by a bunch of
-clockwork, colonel?" Kim asked.</p>
-
-<p>"In a way, yes. The Machine is a most impersonal judge. That fact won't
-help you, though. Martian legal code is strict about killing, there
-being some thirty-odd degrees of murder, ranging in seriousness from a
-'simple homicide to secure a mate,' the punishment for which is death
-by dehydration, most often; to 'killing to secure for oneself material
-benefits,' for which there exist more subtle forms of death by torture."</p>
-
-<p>"Like getting a small-head-size in a vise?" Captain Barnaby grunted.</p>
-
-<p>"That's the usual punishment for murder in the seventeenth degree,
-where the crime is usually 'killing for spiritual advancement.' You
-see, each crime is given special study by the Machine. A great many
-factors are fed in, collated with certain constants within the Machine,
-processed through several dozen stages, and finally combined into a
-single number, which represents the punishment called for. By the way,"
-the colonel studied the back of Rhinklav'n's head, "no consideration
-of the truthfulness of the 'defendant' is entered into the Machine. It
-is presumed that should a man say that he did not commit a crime, he
-didn't; if he did, he'd admit it. Martians have a peculiar character
-defect that prevents them from lying."</p>
-
-<p>"A defect from which we humans are fortunately free," Kim grinned.</p>
-
-<p>"That's no out," Colonel Montgomery countered. "They have witnesses who
-saw Klaggchallak fry. Besides, we prefer to have the mass of Marties
-ignorant of the average earthling's penchant for prevarication. It
-saves the Service a lot of money not to have to prove anything it tells
-our hairy hosts out here."</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>The jeep hit the first of the series of low terraces which set the
-city of Klamugra up from the surrounding desert plains, and the little
-car bounced high off the sand. Colonel Montgomery looked startled, as
-though he'd just remembered something. "You know, in my ethnological
-fervor I didn't realize what you two men are in for. Cosmos! I'm
-practically delivering you up as human sacrifices!"</p>
-
-<p>"We came to that conclusion five days ago, colonel," Lieutenant Kim
-dryly observed.</p>
-
-<p>"I can see what the Fleet Commander meant when he said that he was
-giving me 'a most unpleasant assignment.' Hell, I don't think the
-Machine is able to give a judgment of 'not guilty'." Colonel Montgomery
-gazed toward the city they were approaching. "We've got to turn you
-in. We can't risk a blowup with the Martian Grand Council. There are
-rumors that ..." the colonel glanced again with suspicion at the back
-of Rhinklav'n's hairy neck, as though suspecting that the Martian might
-be able to puzzle out the meaning of their conversation, though it was
-in English. "There are rumors that the -artiansMay have an agent among
-the -ussiansRay. We can't risk having the borsch-eaters more popular
-out here than the Western Powers." The jeep bounded up the last of the
-terraces and through an opening in the city wall. The adobe buildings
-raced past, and with a final bound the jeep came to the edge of the
-huge, circular bowl which held the Machine.</p>
-
-<p>"There's your judge," Colonel Montgomery said, speaking in Esperanto
-again. "I haven't much hope to offer you. For one thing, you're the
-first humans ever to be judged by the Machine."</p>
-
-<p>The men picked up their helmets and air-pumps and adjusted them on
-their shoulders. Rhinklav'n drew his furry nostril-flaps down into
-place against the sudden change in pressure. The plastic top of the
-jeep flew back on its springs and the men climbed out, stretching their
-cramped muscles. The radiophones in the helmets buzzed, and the colonel
-gave Captain Barnaby a last word. "I want to impress you with the fact
-that the Service cannot protect you, from this moment onward. If you
-escape being killed it must be on your own merits. And don't start
-shooting Marties&mdash;won't do you a bit of good. There's a lot at stake
-for Earth here. Good luck, men!" Colonel Montgomery saluted, and he and
-his sergeant jumped back in the jeep, slammed the top down, and whirled
-away.</p>
-
-<p>Rhinklav'n turned to the two EXTS officers. "Gentlemen, I've assigned
-you quarters here, near the Machine. Will you follow me?" Kim and
-Barnaby followed the Martian a short distance from the edge of the
-amphitheater to a lone adobe building, one story high and about ten
-meters square. "Here are your quarters, where you'll stay tonight. Your
-judging is set for tomorrow morning."</p>
-
-<p>Captain Barnaby glanced into the building and was surprised to see
-that it closed with an airlock, had terrestrial canned foods on
-neat shelves, and had regular Service cots in place of the rough
-<i>mal</i>-leather mats that the Martians slept on. "It was good of you to
-go to all this trouble just for myself and Lieutenant Kim, Rhinklav'n,"
-the Captain said.</p>
-
-<p>The Martian paused at the door. "It's not just for you, Captain. Five
-other terrestrials have committed crimes of various proportions within
-the last few weeks. They will also be tried here, after your case is
-disposed of." Rhinklav'n left, considerately closing the airlock door
-and starting the pump on his way out.</p>
-
-<p>Lieutenant Kim took a can of "B" ration beans down from the shelf and
-thoughtfully began to open it with his Service knife. "Captain," he
-said, "this sort of thing could drive our Service from Mars. If the
-Marties consider it their right to judge every Earthling who runs a
-jeep into a farmer's <i>mal</i> or lands half a meter too near one of their
-cities, we won't have a man on the planet in a couple of years."</p>
-
-<p>"Kim, we're precedents."</p>
-
-<p>"What do you mean, Yankee?"</p>
-
-<p>"If the Marties succeed in convicting us of murder in some unheard-of
-degree by using that overgrown Erector Set of theirs, we'll be only
-the first two of a long string of EXTServicemen to be executed under
-Mars law. We can't let them do it." Captain Barnaby paused a moment
-to pour himself out a plateful of beans. "Kim, what was that process
-you used to rely on back in EXTS Academy in Denver? The one that gave
-you the right answers after you found that your first solutions to our
-astrogation problems were a few hundred thousand kilometers off?"</p>
-
-<p>Kim stopped chewing for a moment in surprise. "You mean that you got
-through the Academy without using the 'finagle factor'? No wonder you
-made captain so soon. It's simple: I'd look up the right answer in the
-Service charts, find by what factor my solution was off, and introduce
-that factor into my next calculation, making it inconspicuous under a
-lot of mathematical camouflage. Don't bawl me out about it, Barny; I
-just couldn't see letting my extracurricular activities suffer for my
-schoolwork."</p>
-
-<p>"Yes, you did a lot of your studying at the Denver Dive. No matter,
-little man. Eat hearty and get some sleep." Barnaby stirred his beans
-thoughtfully. "We've got a big day ahead of us tomorrow."</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>Early the next morning a subordinate technician of the Machine hammered
-on the airlock. The two terrestrials pulled on their heavy jackets, fur
-boots, and gauntlets, started the little air-pumps on their shoulders,
-and opened the lock. "The honored First Technician of the Machine
-invites your presence at your trial, which is to begin very soon," the
-Martian said, speaking halting Esperanto. Kim and Barnaby followed him
-to the edge of the Machine bowl. There had been several changes made
-during the night. An elevated platform had been set up, identical to
-the one used in the bloody execution they'd witnessed. About twenty
-Martians were clustered around the Machine, some of them making
-last-minute adjustments in the mechanism; others, evidently sightseers,
-gazing curiously at the two principals in the trial.</p>
-
-<p>Rhinklav'n was waiting, his nose-flaps drawn over his nostrils to keep
-the cold morning air from cutting into his lungs. "I am pleased that
-you come," he said. "The Machine is fully assembled for your problem."
-He pointed down toward the Machine, a vast cluster of separate stages
-connected by rods. "On the far right, in that small building, is the
-power source of the Machine, a mercury-turbine engine. We can't spare
-the water to make steam, you know. The first stage contains the Martian
-actuarial tables, the second has the actuarial system for determining
-the probable life-spans of you two Earthlings. That's without taking
-into consideration the probability that you two will be executed as a
-result of the judgement of the Machine."</p>
-
-<p>Lieutenant Kim nodded. "Most ingenious. But I'm afraid that there's a
-factor that you've omitted."</p>
-
-<p>"We've made no factual error, Lieutenant," Rhinklav'n insisted. "The
-value of the sage Klaggchallak is represented there&mdash;" he pointed to
-the fourth stage, "and your social value to the people of Mars is here
-represented." Rhinklav'n waved one mitten-like hand toward the fifth
-stage. "If you'll examine that stage, you'll observe that your value is
-negative: the shaft representing it revolves in a direction opposite to
-that of the others. Yes, you'll surely be executed."</p>
-
-<p>Captain Barnaby nodded, as though the reiteration of the probability
-of his early demise troubled him less than the philosophical question
-he'd stumbled across. "Still, as my subordinate officer has said,
-there's a factor which you seem to have omitted. In the terminology of
-terrestrial psychometering, this quantity is called&mdash;what did you say
-it was, Lieutenant Kim?"</p>
-
-<p>"The 'finagle factor,' sir."</p>
-
-<p>"Really?" Rhinklav'n asked, the light of scientific inquiry in his
-eyes. "I thought I'd taken all the variables of Earthling physiology
-and psychology into consideration when I set up the plans for the
-trial. What are the mathematics of this 'finagle factor'?"</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>Captain Barnaby put one foot up on a connecting shaft, as though he
-were in the Denver Dive, discussing the relative merits of two video
-dancers. "As you've doubtless noticed in your extensive study of the
-Terrestrial mind, Sir Honored First Technician of the Machine, we of
-Earth place almost equal value on a man's intelligence and on his
-financial standing as criteria of his worth."</p>
-
-<p>"Yes," Rhinklav'n mused, "I noticed your preoccupation with both
-intelligence (a minor mental quality, by the way; far inferior to
-spiritual insight or time-sense) and with the individual's possession
-of Western Credits."</p>
-
-<p>"As I said," Captain Barnaby continued, "there exists a precise
-formula, developed by the...."</p>
-
-<p>"By the Noyoudont Dentifrice Laboratories," Kim supplied.</p>
-
-<p>"Yes; their laboratories developed the mathematics of the finagle
-factor. Briefly, it is this: the square root of the product of
-Intelligence Quotient over one hundred times the number of credits the
-individual has outstanding. Or, written algebraically:" Barnaby knelt
-down and traced in the sand with his gloved index finger:</p>
-
-<p>&#8730;(IQ/100 x money in the bank)</p>
-
-<p>"Quite a simple equation, easily represented on the Machine,"
-Rhinklav'n observed. He called a subordinate technician to his side and
-spoke to him in the clicking polysyllables of the Martian language.
-Turning again to Captain Barnaby, he asked, "And what are the values of
-'IQ' and 'Money in the Bank' for you and Lieutenant Kim?"</p>
-
-<p>"Our combined IQs total about 243. How many credits do you own,
-Lieutenant Kim?"</p>
-
-<p>"Hell, sir; I've got more debts than credits."</p>
-
-<p>"Figure up your debts then, Lieutenant."</p>
-
-<p>Kim raised his right gauntlet, drew a pad of paper and a pencil from a
-pocket at the back of his hand, and scribbled rapidly. "If we get out
-of this, Captain, I'll owe about 1046 credits. Subtracting pay due for
-the last semi-annual period, I owe 437 credits."</p>
-
-<p>"And I have debts totaling 600 credits," Captain Barnaby said
-thoughtfully. He turned to Rhinklav'n. "The debts of myself and
-Lieutenant Kim, Sir Honored First Technician of the Machine, total 1037
-Western Credits. Being debt, that's a negative number, of course."</p>
-
-<p>"Of course, Captain," Rhinklav'n agreed. "The Machine can handle any
-sort of number, even a negative number. You noticed that your social
-value to Mars was easily represented as a minus-number." Rhinklav'n
-talked rapidly to his assistant and handed him the values of the
-finagle factor, rewritten in Martian ideographs. He faced Captain
-Barnaby again. "It will take us about an hour to enter this new factor
-into the Machine," he said. "You'll not mind waiting?"</p>
-
-<p>"No, not at all," Barnaby murmured. He and Kim leaned against the
-inside wall of the amphitheater, watching the Martian technicians hurry
-about; they removed gears and replaced them with gears of another
-ratio; they connected a stage consisting of eccentric cams strung on
-shafts; and they installed a mass of machinery at the sixth stage,
-where the operation of extracting square root was to take place. Kim,
-comparing the heavy gears and levers of the Machine with the compact
-tubes of his electronic astrogator, remarked, "It's like using a trip
-hammer to crack a walnut."</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>After a few minutes of watching, Kim and Barnaby became conscious of an
-intruder within their helmets, a most unpleasant odor. They glanced up
-to the edge of the bowl. The Martian sightseers were sitting up there,
-dangling their legs above the Machine and utilizing the pause in the
-proceedings to eat their picnic lunches. They were busily unwrapping
-bundles of food from the <i>mal</i>-skin pouches hanging by their sides and
-eating as they watched the technicians work over the Machine.</p>
-
-<p>One of the tourists, judging from his height a young male, threw a
-small parcel toward Kim. The lieutenant picked it up and unwrapped it.
-The stench of Martian garlic became unbearable as Kim stared at the
-unidentifiable tidbit of meat the Martian had thrown him; the air-pump
-on his shoulder drew the redolence into his helmet in such quantities
-that Kim's eyes burned. He gestured to show that, while his every
-instinct demanded that he eat the delicious morsel, he couldn't take
-his helmet off to do so. With an elaborate pantomiming of sorrow, Kim
-pitched the gift back up to the Martian boy.</p>
-
-<p>A few adjustments later the technicians filed up from the Machine pit.
-Rhinklav'n walked over to the two EXTS officers. "If you gentlemen will
-accompany me, we'll begin the trial at once."</p>
-
-<p>Kim and Barnaby walked together up the steps that led from the Machine,
-then turned and looked down at the dozens of stages of complex
-machinery, into which memory and intelligence of a sort had been built.
-Rhinklav'n pointed toward the fifth and sixth stages. "It is there
-that the combined finagle factors of you men will be calculated. The
-fifth stage is quite simple; it will perform the necessary division and
-multiplication. The sixth stage will extract the square root of the
-product derived by the fifth. The next six stages of machinery contain
-the variables of terrestrial behavior, which I and my colleagues
-calculated from Earth texts. The other stages on the field, fifty-three
-of them, will collate the results of the calculations of the first
-twelve stages with our legal code and determine punishment. The final
-product will appear at the sixty-seventh stage, represented as the
-speed of rotation of a single shaft. The revolutions-per-time-interval
-are decoded by a simple formula to determine the punishment to be
-levied upon you. Doubtless, it will be some unpleasant form of death."</p>
-
-<p>Kim muttered that he wished that Martians had a bit more tact.</p>
-
-<p>Rhinklav'n waved a hairy arm toward his assistant who had remained
-below in the Machine pit; and that Martian ran to the power house
-to start the mercury-turbine engine that ran the Machine. With a
-whistling that set the thin atmosphere trembling for miles around, the
-turbine began to turn.</p>
-
-<p>The sightseers on the edge of the amphitheater wrapped up the scraps of
-their lunches, replaced them in their <i>mal</i>-skin picnic hampers, and
-stood up to watch the Machine. Kim and Barnaby paced up and down along
-the edge of the bowl, looking down upon the mechanical cerebration
-being performed by the huge Machine. With a smooth transfer of power
-from one stage to the next, the first problem&mdash;the probable duration
-of Klaggchallak's life when it had been interrupted by the jets of the
-<i>Vulcan</i>&mdash;was solved, and the mechanism of the second stage began to
-revolve.</p>
-
-<p>"They're seeing how long we can be expected to live, now," Captain
-Barnaby commented.</p>
-
-<p>That problem fled through a mass of gears and cams; and the partial
-solution, the sum of the two earthling's life expectancies divided by
-that of the priest Klaggchallak, ran across a shaft to the third stage,
-which would determine the old priest's value to the society of Mars.
-On into the fourth stage the problem flowed, to combine all previous
-factors with the earthlings' social value to Mars, a negative number.</p>
-
-<p>In a few moments the problem had progressed to the fifth stage of the
-Machine, where the first steps of the 'finagle factor' were solved. The
-product, a negative number as could be seen by the reversed rotation of
-the main shaft, bowed into the sixth stage, which was to extract square
-root.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>The turbine howled protest as it was forced to overcome the inertia of
-the sixth stage; but a governor at the input stage held the shaft-speed
-constant. The seventh stage, all ready for the problem when it should
-appear from the sixth, held all the computations of the first four
-stages in its smoothly-turning entrails. The initial portion of the
-sixth stage began to move slowly.</p>
-
-<p>There was a sudden, grating noise as the feed-in gear of the fifth
-stage came in contact with a solution gear of the sixth which refused
-to move. The whine of the mercury-turbine engine was shaking the ground
-beneath the two officers' feet now.</p>
-
-<p>As the Martian technicians and picnickers looked on in amazement,
-the shaft between the fifth stage and the sixth began to twist like
-a stick of moist putty. The sixth stage strained and shuddered, then
-followed the twisting shaft over, tearing its moorings from the ground
-and smashing upside-down. The seventh stage entered into the chaos,
-ripping out anchors of steel-in-concrete and slamming onto its side.
-In a moment all the machines in the bowl were muttering and straining
-against the earth. Rhinklav'n ran to the stairway that led down into
-the pit. In the adobe powerhouse the mercury engine was whirling at
-twenty times its optimum rate, tearing the atmosphere with the sound of
-its screaming power. There was the rattle of shrapnel exploding within
-the walls of the powerhouse as the turbine threw off the restrainment
-of its governor. The whole field within the bowl was a mass of
-twitching clockwork, shaken by the final stormings of the suicidal
-turbine. Bars of shining steel twisted and snapped, gear teeth flew
-singing through the thin air. The final chain of stages tore itself
-loose from anchoring and crashed to its side. There was a final roar of
-defiance from the turbine, and the powerhouse walls dissolved before
-an out-rushing blast of superheated mercury. Kim and Barnaby threw
-themselves to the ground as the din increased for a moment, and the
-Martian sightseers sought refuge behind nearby buildings. Suddenly, the
-Machine was silent, except for the tinkle of scraps of metal falling to
-the cement.</p>
-
-<hr class="chap" />
-
-<div class="figcenter">
- <img src="images/illus.jpg" alt=""/>
- <div class="caption">
- <p><i>Bars of shining steel twisted and snapped, gear teeth flew singing through the thin air....</i></p>
- </div>
-</div>
-
-<hr class="chap" />
-
-<p>"Looks as though we were too much for judge, jury, and D.A.," Kim
-murmured into his radiophone. Barnaby nodded, then cautiously climbed
-to his feet.</p>
-
-<p>Rhinklav'n climbed back up the stairway to the brink of the
-amphitheater-become-junkyard. He shoved his way through the questioning
-crowd of Martian sightseers without a word. "Looks like he's going to
-cry," Lieutenant Kim commented into his radiophone. True, Rhinklav'n's
-nose-flaps were hanging limply down below his chin, a sure sign of
-great emotion in a Martian.</p>
-
-<p>Rhinklav'n faced Captain Barnaby wordlessly for a moment. "You may
-leave now," he said at last. The Martian turned his back on the captain
-to look down again on the wreck that had been his beloved Machine.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>The two EXTS officers wandered about Klamugra, the cynosure of all
-Martian eyes, though no one tried to stop them or ask them questions.
-Lieutenant Kim finally spotted a radio tower jutting up above the
-red adobe buildings. Hurrying in the direction of the tower, Kim and
-Barnaby found the Klamugra headquarters of the Extraterrestrial Service.</p>
-
-<p>Colonel Montgomery jumped to his feet as they came in, a look of bald
-disbelief on his face. "Man, I'm glad to see you two! I was about to
-storm out like a knight in shiny armor and save you from the Marties."
-He waved his hand toward the helmet and rifle lying on his typewriter
-table&mdash;"If I'd gotten there too late, I'd have ruptured interplanetary
-friendship for sure!"&mdash;and indicated a decanter on his desk. "Have
-some: that's Edinbourgh scotch, not Los Angeles moon-dew. Tell me why
-I happen to be talking to you now instead of making up a couple of
-packages for your next-of-kin."</p>
-
-<p>"We wrecked their damn Machine," Kim said happily, dropping his helmet
-and gauntlets to the floor and measuring out several fingers of the
-colonel's scotch into his ration can.</p>
-
-<p>"To be a bit more accurate," Captain Barnaby corrected, "we drove the
-Machine insane." He poured himself a stiff shot of scotch and downed it
-with appreciation.</p>
-
-<p>"Our personalities are so complex that the Machine blew up all over
-the landscape when it tried to understand them," Kim said. He dragged
-a chair out from behind the typewriter table and sat down, carefully
-balancing the ration can.</p>
-
-<p>"It's rather as though we should set our electronic astrogator to work
-on a problem with three variables in five dimensions, rather than in
-four," Captain Barnaby explained. "As you told us, the Machine was a
-mechanical-analogus calculator. It can multiply, divide, add, square
-and cube, and extract roots. It performs these operations by coding
-numbers into mechanical relationships."</p>
-
-<p>"Just a big adding machine," Kim commented irreverently.</p>
-
-<p>"And our 'finagle factor' was too much for a mechanical system."
-Captain Barnaby briefly explained to the colonel how he and Kim had
-induced Rhinklav'n to add their invented factor to the Machine's setup.
-"You see, the finagle factor resolved itself into the square root of a
-negative number. An electronic calculator, like our astrogator, could
-extract the root of a minus-number: 'imaginary' numbers of this sort
-are implicit in its circuit. The Martian Machine out there couldn't do
-this though. Since there is no mechanical analogue for an imaginary
-number, the Machine tried to extract the square root of our finagle
-factor in the same manner in which it would attempt to extract the root
-of a real number."</p>
-
-<p>Kim drained, his ration can neatly and remarked, "The Machine couldn't
-do what it had to. All the power of the turbine was thrown into the
-root extracting system, which wouldn't revolve. So the Machine went
-nuts, pardon me, sir, and blew its top. Wrecked the power source and
-all sixty-seven stages. With the square root of minus one, we busted
-up a Machine half a million years old."</p>
-
-<p>"What now?" Colonel Montgomery asked, rhetorically.</p>
-
-<p>Captain Barnaby studied the bottom of his ration can a moment. "Well,
-sir, Rhinklav'n was more puzzled, than angered. He wanted to judge
-humans not out of malice, but from a genuine scientific curiosity. He
-wanted to see how the Machine would act with an alien problem. His
-Machine is too badly broken-up ever to repair. He'll have to find
-another method of judging criminals, first of all. Martian society is
-founded on strict law."</p>
-
-<p>"Just a moment." The colonel got up from his desk and went down the
-hall to a door marked "Judge Advocate General's Department, EXTS." He
-returned with a heavy book, bound between khaki-board covers. "We'll
-give this book to Rhinklav'n, and you gentlemen may return to the
-Denver Joint."</p>
-
-<p>"Dive, sir," Kim corrected.</p>
-
-<p>"Yes, Lieutenant." Colonel Montgomery handed the big book to Captain
-Barnaby. "Take this to Rhinklav'n before you leave, Captain."</p>
-
-<p>Barnaby turned to the title page and read in Esperanto, "Blackstone.
-<i>On the Study of Law.</i>"</p>
-
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