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+This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements,
+metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be
+in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES.
+
+Procedures for determining public domain status are described in
+the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org.
+
+No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in
+jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize
+this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright
+status under the laws that apply to them.
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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #69528 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/69528)
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-The Project Gutenberg eBook of Nuts to crack, Multum in parvo
-library, v. 2, no. 20, August 1895, by Anonymous
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
-most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
-of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you
-will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before
-using this eBook.
-
-Title: Nuts to crack, Multum in parvo library, v. 2, no. 20, August 1895
- A galaxy of puzzles, riddles, conundrums, etc.
-
-Author: Anonymous
-
-Release Date: December 12, 2022 [eBook #69528]
-
-Language: English
-
-Produced by: Demian Katz, Craig Kirkwood, and the Online Distributed
- Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (Images courtesy
- of the Digital Library@Villanova University.)
-
-*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK NUTS TO CRACK, MULTUM IN
-PARVO LIBRARY, V. 2, NO. 20, AUGUST 1895 ***
-
-
-Transcriber’s Note:
-
-Text enclosed by underscores is in italics (_italics_), and text
-enclosed by equal signs is in bold (=bold=).
-
-Additional Transcriber’s Notes are at the end.
-
- * * * * *
-
-MULTUM IN PARVO LIBRARY.
-
-Entered at the Boston Post office as second class matter.
-
-Vol. 2. AUG., 1895. Published Monthly. No. 20.
-
-
-
-
-NUTS TO CRACK
-
-
- A Galaxy of Puzzles, Riddles,
- Conundrums, Etc.
-
- Smallest Magazine in the world. Subscription price
- 50 cts. per year. Single Copies 5 cts. each.
-
- PUBLISHED BY
- A. B. COURTNEY,
- Room 74, 45 Milk Street,
- BOSTON, MASS.
-
-
-
-
-Two Puzzling Queries.
-
-
-Read the following surprising sentence.
-
-=All 0.=
-
-_Ans._ Nothing after all.
-
-Make one word of the letters of words _new door_.
-
-_Ans._ One word.
-
-
-
-
-Grammatical Puzzle.
-
-
- Let the rich, great and noble, banquet in the festal halls,
- And pass the hours away, as the most thoughtless revel;
- Then seek the poor man’s dreary home, whose very dingy walls
- Proclaim full well to all how low his rank and level.
-
-Take away one letter from a word in the above stanza and substitute
-another, leaving the word so metamorphosed still a word of the
-English language; and, by that change, totally alter the syntactical
-construction of the whole sentence, changing the moods and tenses of
-verbs, turning verbs into nouns, nouns into adjectives, and adjectives
-into adverbs, etc., and so make the entire stanza bear quite a
-different meaning from that which it has as it stands above.
-
-
-
-
-Answer to Grammatical Puzzle.
-
-
-Take away L in the subjunctive “Let” at the beginning of the first
-line, and substitute S, and so turn it into the imperative “Set,” when
-the changes which necessarily follow will be immediately apparent.
-
-
-
-
-Conundrums.
-
-
-1. Why is ambition like a weathercock? Because it is a vain and
-glittering thing to aspire (_a-spire_).
-
-2. What preserve would an egg name if it could speak? Ma-me-laid
-(_Marmelade_).
-
-3. What is the difference between a schoolmaster and an engine driver?
-One trains the mind, the other minds the train.
-
-4. Why are railways like laundresses? Because they have “ironed” the
-world, and occasionally done a little mangling.
-
-5. Which is the most difficult train to catch? The 12:50, because it is
-ten to one if you do catch it.
-
-6. What nation does a criminal dread most? Condem-nation.
-
-7. What musical instrument invites you to fish? Cast-a-net (_castanet_).
-
-8. What trees flourish best upon the hearth? Ashes.
-
-9. Which is the queen of the roses, and why? The rose of the watering
-pot, because it rains (_reigns_) over them all.
-
-10. Why is a dog biting his own tail like a good manager? Because he
-makes both ends meet.
-
-11. Why is love like pattens? Because it elevates the soul (_sole_).
-
-12. Why are stars the best astronomers? Because they have studded
-(_studied_) the heavens since the Creation.
-
-13. If Mr. Rowland Hill were to give each of his children a gold dollar
-why would he be like the rising sun? Because he tips the little Hills
-with gold.
-
-14. What is the difference between Mario and Cardinal Wiseman? One
-performs mass in white and the other mass in yellow (_Masaniello_).
-
-15. What is the difference between a pastry cook and a bill sticker?
-One puffs up paste and the other pastes up puffs.
-
-16. Who was the first whistler, and what was his tune? The wind, when
-he whistled “Over the hills and far away.”
-
-17. Why have fowls no future state? Because they have their next world
-in this world (_necks twirled in this world_).
-
-18. Which is the easiest of the three professions? Divinity; because it
-is easier to _preach_ than to _practice_.
-
-19. Why are your nose and chin always at variance? Because words are
-continually passing between them.
-
-20. What kind of vice is that which people shun if they are ever so
-bad? Ad-vice.
-
-21. Why should a little man never marry a bouncing widow? Because he
-would be called “the widow’s mite.”
-
-22. What is that which every one wishes for and yet tries to get rid
-of? A good appetite.
-
-23. What kind of sweetmeats did they have in the Ark? Preserved pairs
-(_pears_).
-
-24. Why are potatoes and corn like certain sinners of old? Because
-having _eyes_ they see not, and _ears_ they hear not.
-
-25. Why is wit like a Chinese lady’s foot? Because _brevity_ is the
-_sole_ of it.
-
-26. Why is a man who does not bet as bad as one who does? Because he is
-no bettor.
-
-27. Which travels at the greatest speed, heat or cold? Heat, for you
-can easily _catch cold_.
-
-28. Why is a spider a good correspondent? Because he drops a line by
-every post.
-
-29. If you suddenly saw a house on fire, what three celebrated authors
-would you feel inclined to name? Dickens, Howitt, Burns (_Dickens! How
-it burns_).
-
-30. Why should the male sex avoid the letter A? Because it makes men,
-mean.
-
-31. What kind of wine is both meat and drink? Old port, with a crust.
-
-32. Why are people who stutter not to be relied on? Because they are
-always breaking their word.
-
-33. Why is a game of cards like a timber yard? Because there are always
-a great many _deals_ in it.
-
-34. What is the difference between forms and ceremonies? You sit upon
-one and stand upon the other.
-
-35. In what color should a secret be kept? Inviolate (_in violet_).
-
-36. Which would you rather have, five silver dollars or a five-dollar
-bill? The latter, because you _double_ it when you put it in your
-pocket, and find it _in-creases_ when you take it out.
-
-37. In what part of the church do they ring the bells (_belles_)? At
-the altar.
-
-38. We will send you 100 useful articles for 10 cts., postpaid. W. S.
-Everett & Co., Lynn, Mass.
-
-39. What is that of which the common sort is best? Sense.
-
-40. Why should a perfumer be a good editor? Because he is accustomed to
-make _elegant extracts_.
-
-41. Why is a man like a green gooseberry? Because any woman can make a
-_fool_ of him.
-
-42. What is the color of a grass plot covered with snow? Invisible
-green.
-
-43. Why ought a greedy man to wear a plaid waistcoat? To keep a check
-upon his stomach.
-
-44. Why is an accepted suitor like a person guilty of a crime? Because
-he ought to be transported.
-
-45. Send 10 cents to Keystone Book Co., P. O. Box 1634, Philadelphia,
-Pa., and you will receive 12 new and complete books, entirely different
-from the set of which this “Nuts to Crack” book is sold with.
-
-46. Why is an avaricious man like one troubled with a bad memory?
-Because he is always forgetting.
-
-47. What is the best kind of tea? Pacific Tea.
-
-48. Why is a girl not a noun? Because a lass (_alas!_) is an
-interjection.
-
-49. Why are indolent persons’ beds too short for them? Because they lie
-too long in them.
-
-50. When is a man like a looking-glass? When he reflects.
-
-51. When is a window like a star? When it is a skylight.
-
-52. Why is a widower like a house in a state of dilapidation? Because
-he wants re-pairing.
-
-53. What part of their infant tuition have old bachelors and old maids
-most profited by? Learning to _go alone_.
-
-54. When is a wineglass like an accomplished prediction? When it is
-fulfilled (_full-filled_).
-
-55. Which of the heathen gods is most resorted to in sickness? Mercury.
-
-56. Why is the letter E like death? Because it is the end of life.
-
-57. Why is a lady in a cotton dress like anything published? Because
-she appears in _print_.
-
-58. What parts of speech are shopkeepers most anxious to dispose of?
-Articles.
-
-59. Why are weary persons like carriage wheels? Because they are tired.
-
-60. When is a door not a door? When it’s ajar.
-
-61. What is that which we all eat and drink, though it is sometimes a
-woman and sometimes a man? A toast.
-
-62. Why would a tanner make a good chemist? Because he understands
-oxides (_ox hides_).
-
-63. Why is Ireland like a bottle of wine? Because it has _Cork_ in it.
-
-64. Send 12 cents in stamps to Rex Company, Box 494, Philadelphia, Pa.,
-and you will receive one package of tea, one silver plated thimble, one
-Colorado gold pen and one gold watch chain. Don’t miss this great offer.
-
-65. Why is a well trained horse like a benevolent man? Because it stops
-at the sound of woe (_whoa_).
-
-66. Why is the port of New Haven like a very wonderful phenomenon in
-acoustics? Because it includes a part of the sea, called the Sound; and
-_that_ is the only _sound_ that you can _see_.
-
-67. When may a man be considered to be really over head and ears in
-debt? When he owes for his wig.
-
-
-
-
-A Batch of Puzzles.
-
-
-_See Answers Following._
-
-1. The following letters are inscribed on a stone tablet placed
-immediately above the Ten Commandments in a country church in the
-northwest of England, and are deciphered with only one letter:
-
- P R S V R Y P R F C T M N!
- V R K P T H S P R C P T S T N.
-
-2. If the =B= m t put some: but if the =B=.
-
-3. What difference is there between twice eight and fifty, and twice
-fifty-eight--and what is their product?
-
-4. In an army consisting of 187 squadrons of horse, each 157 men, and
-207 battalions, each 560 men--how many effective soldiers, supposing
-that in 7 hospitals there are 473 sick?
-
-5. The Spectator mentions a club of fat people, whose number was only
-15, and yet weighed no less than 3 tons--what was the weight of each
-person?
-
-6. Three boys met a servant maid carrying apples to the market. The
-first took half what she had, but returned to her ten; the second took
-one-third, but returned two; and the third took away half those she had
-left, but returned her one. She had then twelve apples left--how many
-had she at first?
-
-7. A schoolmaster being asked how many scholars he had, said: “If I
-had as many, half as many, and one-quarter as many more, I should have
-88”--how many had he?
-
-8. A person having about him a certain number of Portugal pieces, said:
-“If the third, fourth and sixth of them were added together, they would
-make 54.” I desire to know how many he had?
-
-9. A man overtaking a maid driving a flock of geese, said to her: “How
-do you do, sweetheart; where are you going with these 30 geese?” “No,
-sir,” said she, “I have not 30; but if I had as many more, half as many
-more, and 5 geese besides, I should have 30.” How many had she?
-
-10. Three persons discoursing concerning their ages: says H, “I am 30
-years of age;” says K, “I am as old as H, and one-fourth of L;” and
-says L, “I am as old as you both.” What was the age of each person?
-
-11. What is the difference between twice 8 and 20, and twice 28; as
-also between twice 5 and 50, and twice 55?
-
-12. A schoolmaster being asked how many scholars he had, said if he had
-as many more, one-half as many, and one-fourth as many, he should have
-99. How many had he?
-
-13. An ancient lady, being asked how old she was, to avoid a direct
-answer, said: “I have 9 children, and there are 3 years between the
-birth of each of them; the eldest was born when I was 19 years old,
-which is now exactly the age of the youngest.” How old was the lady?
-
-14. A gentleman went to sea at 17 years of age; 8 years after that he
-had a son born, who lived 40 years, and died before his father; after
-whom the father lived twice twenty years, and then died also. What was
-the age of the father when he died?
-
-15. A person said he had 20 children, that it happened there was a year
-and a half between each of their ages; his eldest son was born when
-he was 24 years old, and the age of the youngest is 21. What was the
-father’s age?
-
-16. A sheepfold was robbed three nights successively; the first night
-one-half of the sheep were stolen and half a sheep more; the second
-night half the remainder were lost, and half a sheep more; the last
-night they took half that were left and half a sheep more, by which
-time they were reduced to 20. How many were there at first?
-
-17. There are two numbers, the one 48, the other twice as much. What is
-the difference between their sum and difference?
-
-18. Two men depart both from one place, the one goes north the other
-south; the one goes 7 miles and the other 11 miles a day. How far are
-they distant at the twelfth day of their departure?
-
-19.
-
- When first the marriage knot was tied between my wife and me,
- Her age did mine as far exceed, as three times three does three;
- But when seven years, and half seven years, we man and wife had been,
- My age came then as near to her’s as eight is to sixteen.
- What was each of our ages when married?
-
-20. If 12 oxen will eat 3 acres and one-third of grass in four weeks
-and 21 oxen will eat 10 acres in 9 weeks--how many oxen will eat 24
-acres in 18 weeks, the grass being allowed to grow uniformly?
-
-21. A lady was asked her age, who replied thus:
-
- My age, if multiplied by three,
- Two-sevenths of that product tripled be,
- The square root of two-ninths of that is four--
- Now tell my age, or never see me more.
-
-
-
-
-Answers to Batch of Puzzles.
-
-
-1. The letter E.
-
- “Persevere, ye perfect men!
- Ever keep these precepts ten.”
-
-2. If the grate be empty, put some coal on; but if the grate be full,
-stop.
-
-3. Difference 50, product 7656.
-
-4. 144808.
-
-5. 448 lbs.
-
-6. 40.
-
-7. 32.
-
-8. 72.
-
-9. 10.
-
-10. H 30, K 50 and L 80.
-
-11. 20 and 50.
-
-12. 36.
-
-13. 62.
-
-14. 114.
-
-15. 73-1/2 years.
-
-16. 107.
-
-17. 96.
-
-18. 216 miles.
-
-19. 10-1/2 years the man, 31-1/2 years the woman.
-
-20. 30.
-
-21. 28 years.
-
-
-
-
-Arithmetical Puzzle.
-
-
- The sum of four figures, in value will be
- Above seven thousand, nine hundred and three;
- But when they are halved, you’ll find very fair
- The sum will be nothing, in truth I declare.
-
-
-
-
-Answer to Arithmetical Puzzle.
-
-
-The four figures are 8888, which, being divided by a line drawn through
-the middle, becomes
-
- 0000
- 0000
-
-the sum of which is eight 0s, or nothing.
-
-Send 12 cents to the firm from whom you received this book, and get the
-Marvelous Package of Games, including checkers, dominoes, authors, etc.
-Biggest bargain lot of Games ever offered.
-
-
-
-
-Magic Age Table.
-
-
- 1 2 4 8 16 32
- 3 3 5 9 17 33
- 5 6 6 10 19 34
- 7 7 7 11 18 35
- 9 10 12 12 20 36
- 11 11 13 13 21 37
- 13 14 14 14 22 38
- 15 15 15 15 23 39
- 17 18 20 24 24 40
- 19 19 21 25 25 41
- 21 22 22 26 26 42
- 23 23 23 27 27 43
- 25 26 28 28 28 44
- 27 27 29 29 29 45
- 29 30 30 30 30 46
- 31 31 31 31 31 47
- 33 34 36 40 48 48
- 35 35 37 41 49 49
- 37 38 38 42 50 50
- 39 38 39 43 51 51
- 41 42 44 44 52 52
- 43 43 45 45 53 53
- 45 46 46 46 54 54
- 47 47 47 47 55 55
- 49 50 52 56 56 56
- 51 51 53 57 57 57
- 53 54 54 58 58 58
- 55 55 55 59 59 59
- 57 58 60 60 60 60
- 59 59 61 61 61 61
- 61 62 62 62 62 62
- 63 63 63 63 63 63
-
-KEY TO TABLE.--Add together the figures at the top of each column in
-which the age is found and the sum will be the age sought. Example:
-Hand the table to a lady and request her to tell you in which column
-or columns her age is found; if she says the first, second and fifth,
-you can say it is 19 by mentally adding together the first figures of
-those three columns, and so on for any age up to 63.
-
-
-
-
-Cracked Nuts.
-
-
-“Parlor Matches”--Courting in the front room.
-
-All men are not homeless, but some are home less than others.
-
-A young Oil City gent calls his girl revenge, because she is sweet.
-
-When is a small baby like a big banker? When he is a wroth-child.
-
-Before slates were used people multiplied on the face of the earth.
-
-How may a man always become four-handed? By doubling his fists.
-
-The economical baby puts its toes in its mouth to make both ends meet.
-
-There’s nothing boisterous about the love for whiskey--it’s a still
-affection.
-
-Why is a situation of great trust like a back tooth? Because it is hard
-to fill.
-
-In art matters the education of the eye, of course, includes the proper
-treatment of the pupils.
-
-Why are balloons in the air like vagabonds? Because they have no
-visible means of support.
-
-Jones calls his dog Hickory, because he has a rough bark.
-
-The only perpetual thing about perpetual motion is its failure.
-
-Some shoemakers are notoriously long-lived--the lasters, for instance.
-
-Billiards must be an easy game, for it’s mostly done on cushions.
-
-Ricrac is a tidy affair.--_Barber’s Gazette._
-
-Domestic “sauce” is kept in family jars.
-
-Bronze is a very fashionable hue nowadays, but brass has not entirely
-gone out.
-
-The _Barber’s Gazette_, of New York City, has failed. It was strapped.
-Next!
-
-A man with a noisy dog calls him “Tree,” because all the bark is on the
-outside.
-
-Society is a fraction whose numerator is clothes and whose denominator
-is cash.
-
-To introduce our celebrated Perfume, we will send a case postpaid,
-for 12 cents. We will mail with it, _absolutely free_, a beautiful
-gold plated Garnet and Opal ring. Send 12 cents in stamps and we will
-surprise and delight you. Address: W. S. Everett & Co., Lynn, Mass.
-
-Flats are growing popular in New York. New York “flats” are unpopular
-the country over.
-
-We fear the Montreal courts will hold that the matter of compulsory
-vaccination is ultra virus.
-
-It is generally when you are not looking out for a woman that you get
-on her trail.
-
-The best telephone bell--The hello girl at the other end of the line.
-
-The poetry of motion--A picnic girl with a bug down her back.
-
-In some of our down town restaurants, macadamized pie crust seems to be
-very popular.
-
-The letter D is truly an old salt--been following the C for years.
-
-“How to get fat”--Go to the butcher shop and purchase it by the pound.
-
-The expense of evening walks is diminished now that ice cream has been
-called in.
-
-A classical farmer in Burlington Township names all his pigs after the
-Greek roots.
-
-Approaching a Crisis--Walking toward a restless girl baby.
-
-A Boston girl visiting in Danbury claims to wear limbbings during
-severe weather.
-
-Blessed is the man who loveth his wife’s relations; and not only
-blessed, but also scarce.
-
-Love laughs at locksmiths, but we defy anybody or anything to laugh at
-a plumber.
-
-The _Rochester Express_ complains that the mornings get up too early.
-
-The difference between a woman and an umbrella is, that you can shut up
-an umbrella.
-
-Youth--“Pa, give me an example of a ‘floating debt.’” Pa--(sadly)--“My
-yacht.”
-
-A cold wave--The preliminary flourish of the handkerchief.
-
-A goose is an inoffensive fowl, and yet everybody gets down on her.
-
-When a man bows assent to what you are saying he stoops to concur.
-
-If you lack pluck, just eat buckwheat cakes. They’ll make you come to
-the scratch.
-
-The church festival season is nearly over, and the solitary oyster will
-soon be out of his stew.
-
-Talk is cheap, but the love prattle of a pretty girl is dear.
-
-A flirt’s heart is like an omnibus--it always has room for one more.
-
-He was “Claude” before he married her, and they say he was more clawed
-afterward.
-
-He--“The music was so loud that I couldn’t hear myself talk.” She
-(bored)--“Oh, how nice!”
-
-Slight of Hand--Refusing a marriage proposal.
-
-It takes a Japanese girl thirteen hours to dress for a party.
-
-Sweetening one’s coffee is the first stirring event of the day.
-
-Free! We will send you an elegant large magazine 6 months, free, if you
-send 10 cents to have your name and address inserted in our Directory,
-which goes to over 1000 publishers, importers, etc., who will send you
-samples of new goods, latest books, newspapers, catalogues, etc. You
-will get a big mail daily. All at a cost of 10 cents. W. S. Everett &
-Co., Publishers, Lynn, Mass.
-
-A lightning express would be unsafe were it not for the conductor.
-
-Whatever the season, a gymnast wears both spring and fall clothing.
-
-It is beauty’s privilege to kill time, and time’s privilege to kill
-beauty.
-
-“I am climbin’ the ’ill of experience,” as the boy said who was made
-sick by smoking.
-
-Strange behavior--A vessel “hugging” the coast.
-
-What is the great want of the age?--Want of funds.
-
-When is the water most liable to escape?--When it is only half tide.
-
-The violinist who “carried the house by storm” used a rain bow
-afterward.
-
-Even a clothes line becomes unsteady when it has too many sheets in the
-wind.
-
-“Mankind,” said the preacher, “includes woman; for man embraces woman.”
-
-When is a ship like a dressmaker?--When she’s rounding the Cape or
-tacking about.
-
-“The only way to look at a lady’s faults,” exclaimed a gallant, “is to
-shut your eyes.”
-
-“Cutter & Fitts” are said to be the names of the fashionable
-dressmakers in New York.
-
-Handsome is as handsome drives without upsetting the hansom.
-
-Those who toil and spin--The bicycle riders.
-
- * * * * *
-
-Transcriber’s Notes:
-
-Punctuation has been made consistent.
-
-Variations in spelling and hyphenation were retained as they appear in
-the original publication, except that obvious typographical errors have
-been corrected.
-
-The following changes were made:
-
-p. 8: In question 5, “tons” means “long tons” (than 3 tons).
-
-p. 11: The correct answer to question 16 is 167 (16. 107.).
-
-p. 13: Partially illegible word assumed to be “thirteen” (girl thirteen
-hours).
-
-p. 13: Partially illegible phrase assumed to be “coffee is the first
-stirring event” (Sweetening one’s coffee is the first stirring event
-of).
-
-*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK NUTS TO CRACK, MULTUM IN PARVO
-LIBRARY, V. 2, NO. 20, AUGUST 1895 ***
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-<p style='text-align:center; font-size:1.2em; font-weight:bold'>The Project Gutenberg eBook of Nuts to crack, Multum in parvo library, v. 2, no. 20, August 1895, by Anonymous</p>
-<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
-most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
-of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online
-at <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. If you
-are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the
-country where you are located before using this eBook.
-</div>
-
-<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: Nuts to crack, Multum in parvo library, v. 2, no. 20, August 1895</p>
-<p style='display:block; margin-left:2em; text-indent:0; margin-top:0; margin-bottom:1em;'>A galaxy of puzzles, riddles, conundrums, etc.</p>
-<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: Anonymous</p>
-<p style='display:block; text-indent:0; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: December 12, 2022 [eBook #69528]</p>
-<p style='display:block; text-indent:0; margin:1em 0'>Language: English</p>
- <p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em; text-align:left'>Produced by: Demian Katz, Craig Kirkwood, and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (Images courtesy of the Digital Library@Villanova University.)</p>
-<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK NUTS TO CRACK, MULTUM IN PARVO LIBRARY, V. 2, NO. 20, AUGUST 1895 ***</div>
-
-<div class="figcenter illowp49" style="max-width: 56.8125em;">
- <img id="coverpage" class="w100" src="images/cover.jpg" alt="Cover.">
-</div>
-
-<hr class="tb x-ebookmaker-drop">
-<div class="chapter">
-<div class="boxit">
-<p class="center xlargefont sansseriffont boldfont">MULTUM IN PARVO LIBRARY.</p>
-
-<p class="center">Entered at the Boston Post office as second class matter.</p>
-
-<hr class="full">
-
-<div class="center">
-<p class="displayinline xlargefont sansseriffont" style="vertical-align:top">Vol. 2.</p>
-<p class="displayinline center" style="vertical-align:top; margin-left:1.5em; margin-right:1.5em">AUG., 1895.<br>
-Published Monthly.</p>
-<p class="displayinline xlargefont sansseriffont" style="vertical-align:top">No. 20.</p>
-</div>
-
-<hr class="full">
-
-<h1 class="nobreak">NUTS<br>
-TO<br>
-CRACK</h1>
-
-
-<p class="center xlargefont boldfont">A Galaxy of Puzzles, Riddles,<br>
-Conundrums, Etc.</p>
-
-<hr class="full" style="margin-top:1em">
-
-<p class="center">Smallest Magazine in the world. Subscription price<br>
-50 cts. per year. Single Copies 5 cts. each.</p>
-
-<p class="center p1"><span class="smallfont">PUBLISHED BY</span><br>
-<span class="boldfont largefont">A. B. COURTNEY,<br>
-Room 74, 45 Milk Street,<br>
-BOSTON, MASS.</span></p>
-</div></div>
-
-
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop">
-
-<div class="chapter">
-<p><span class="pagenum">[2]</span></p>
-
-<h2 class="nobreak">Two Puzzling Queries.</h2>
-</div>
-
-
-<p>Read the following surprising sentence.</p>
-
-<p><b>All 0.</b></p>
-
-<p><em>Ans.</em> Nothing after all.</p>
-
-<p>Make one word of the letters of words <em>new door</em>.</p>
-
-<p><em>Ans.</em> One word.</p>
-
-
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop">
-
-<div class="chapter">
-<h2 class="nobreak">Grammatical Puzzle.</h2>
-</div>
-
-
-<div class="poetry-container">
-<div class="poetry">
- <div class="stanza">
- <div class="verse indent0">Let the rich, great and noble, banquet in the festal halls,</div>
- <div class="verse indent2">And pass the hours away, as the most thoughtless revel;</div>
- <div class="verse indent0">Then seek the poor man’s dreary home, whose very dingy walls</div>
- <div class="verse indent2">Proclaim full well to all how low his rank and level.</div>
- </div>
-</div>
-</div>
-
-<p>Take away one letter from a word in the above
-stanza and substitute another, leaving the word so
-metamorphosed still a word of the English language;
-and, by that change, totally alter the syntactical
-construction of the whole sentence, changing
-the moods and tenses of verbs, turning verbs
-into nouns, nouns into adjectives, and adjectives
-into adverbs, etc., and so make the entire stanza
-bear quite a different meaning from that which it
-has as it stands above.</p>
-
-
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop">
-
-<div class="chapter">
-<h2 class="nobreak">Answer to Grammatical Puzzle.</h2>
-</div>
-
-
-<p>Take away L in the subjunctive “Let” at the beginning
-of the first line, and substitute S, and so<span class="pagenum">[3]</span>
-turn it into the imperative “Set,” when the
-changes which necessarily follow will be immediately
-apparent.</p>
-
-
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop">
-
-<div class="chapter">
-<h2 class="nobreak">Conundrums.</h2>
-</div>
-
-
-<p>1. Why is ambition like a weathercock? Because
-it is a vain and glittering thing to aspire
-(<em>a-spire</em>).</p>
-
-<p>2. What preserve would an egg name if it
-could speak? Ma-me-laid (<em>Marmelade</em>).</p>
-
-<p>3. What is the difference between a schoolmaster
-and an engine driver? One trains the mind,
-the other minds the train.</p>
-
-<p>4. Why are railways like laundresses? Because
-they have “ironed” the world, and occasionally
-done a little mangling.</p>
-
-<p>5. Which is the most difficult train to catch?
-The 12:50, because it is ten to one if you do catch
-it.</p>
-
-<p>6. What nation does a criminal dread most?
-Condem-nation.</p>
-
-<p>7. What musical instrument invites you to fish?
-Cast-a-net (<em>castanet</em>).</p>
-
-<p>8. What trees flourish best upon the hearth?
-Ashes.</p>
-
-<p>9. Which is the queen of the roses, and why?
-The rose of the watering pot, because it rains
-(<em>reigns</em>) over them all.</p>
-
-<p>10. Why is a dog biting his own tail like a good
-manager? Because he makes both ends meet.</p>
-
-<p>11. Why is love like pattens? Because it elevates
-the soul (<em>sole</em>).</p>
-
-<p>12. Why are stars the best astronomers? Because
-they have studded (<em>studied</em>) the heavens
-since the Creation.</p>
-
-<p>13. If Mr. Rowland Hill were to give each of his
-children a gold dollar why would he be like<span class="pagenum">[4]</span>
-the rising sun? Because he tips the little Hills
-with gold.</p>
-
-<p>14. What is the difference between Mario and
-Cardinal Wiseman? One performs mass in white
-and the other mass in yellow (<i lang="it" xml:lang="it">Masaniello</i>).</p>
-
-<p>15. What is the difference between a pastry
-cook and a bill sticker? One puffs up paste and
-the other pastes up puffs.</p>
-
-<p>16. Who was the first whistler, and what was
-his tune? The wind, when he whistled “Over the
-hills and far away.”</p>
-
-<p>17. Why have fowls no future state? Because
-they have their next world in this world (<em>necks
-twirled in this world</em>).</p>
-
-<p>18. Which is the easiest of the three professions?
-Divinity; because it is easier to <em>preach</em> than to
-<em>practice</em>.</p>
-
-<p>19. Why are your nose and chin always at variance?
-Because words are continually passing
-between them.</p>
-
-<p>20. What kind of vice is that which people shun
-if they are ever so bad? Ad-vice.</p>
-
-<p>21. Why should a little man never marry a
-bouncing widow? Because he would be called
-“the widow’s mite.”</p>
-
-<p>22. What is that which every one wishes for and
-yet tries to get rid of? A good appetite.</p>
-
-<p>23. What kind of sweetmeats did they have in
-the Ark? Preserved pairs (<em>pears</em>).</p>
-
-<p>24. Why are potatoes and corn like certain sinners
-of old? Because having <em>eyes</em> they see not,
-and <em>ears</em> they hear not.</p>
-
-<p>25. Why is wit like a Chinese lady’s foot? Because
-<em>brevity</em> is the <em>sole</em> of it.</p>
-
-<p>26. Why is a man who does not bet as bad as
-one who does? Because he is no bettor.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum">[5]</span></p>
-
-<p>27. Which travels at the greatest speed, heat or
-cold? Heat, for you can easily <em>catch cold</em>.</p>
-
-<p>28. Why is a spider a good correspondent? Because
-he drops a line by every post.</p>
-
-<p>29. If you suddenly saw a house on fire, what
-three celebrated authors would you feel inclined to
-name? Dickens, Howitt, Burns (<em>Dickens! How it
-burns</em>).</p>
-
-<p>30. Why should the male sex avoid the letter A?
-Because it makes men, mean.</p>
-
-<p>31. What kind of wine is both meat and drink?
-Old port, with a crust.</p>
-
-<p>32. Why are people who stutter not to be relied
-on? Because they are always breaking their
-word.</p>
-
-<p>33. Why is a game of cards like a timber yard?
-Because there are always a great many <em>deals</em> in
-it.</p>
-
-<p>34. What is the difference between forms and
-ceremonies? You sit upon one and stand upon
-the other.</p>
-
-<p>35. In what color should a secret be kept? Inviolate
-(<em>in violet</em>).</p>
-
-<p>36. Which would you rather have, five silver
-dollars or a five-dollar bill? The latter, because
-you <em>double</em> it when you put it in your pocket, and
-find it <em>in-creases</em> when you take it out.</p>
-
-<p>37. In what part of the church do they ring the
-bells (<em>belles</em>)? At the altar.</p>
-
-<p>38. We will send you 100 useful articles for 10
-cts., postpaid. W. S. Everett &amp; Co., Lynn, Mass.</p>
-
-<p>39. What is that of which the common sort is
-best? Sense.</p>
-
-<p>40. Why should a perfumer be a good editor?
-Because he is accustomed to make <em>elegant extracts</em>.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum">[6]</span></p>
-
-<p>41. Why is a man like a green gooseberry? Because
-any woman can make a <em>fool</em> of him.</p>
-
-<p>42. What is the color of a grass plot covered
-with snow? Invisible green.</p>
-
-<p>43. Why ought a greedy man to wear a plaid
-waistcoat? To keep a check upon his stomach.</p>
-
-<p>44. Why is an accepted suitor like a person
-guilty of a crime? Because he ought to be transported.</p>
-
-<p>45. Send 10 cents to Keystone Book Co., P. O.
-Box 1634, Philadelphia, Pa., and you will receive
-12 new and complete books, entirely different from
-the set of which this “Nuts to Crack” book is sold
-with.</p>
-
-<p>46. Why is an avaricious man like one troubled
-with a bad memory? Because he is always forgetting.</p>
-
-<p>47. What is the best kind of tea? Pacific
-Tea.</p>
-
-<p>48. Why is a girl not a noun? Because a lass
-(<em>alas!</em>) is an interjection.</p>
-
-<p>49. Why are indolent persons’ beds too short
-for them? Because they lie too long in them.</p>
-
-<p>50. When is a man like a looking-glass? When
-he reflects.</p>
-
-<p>51. When is a window like a star? When it is
-a skylight.</p>
-
-<p>52. Why is a widower like a house in a state of
-dilapidation? Because he wants re-pairing.</p>
-
-<p>53. What part of their infant tuition have old
-bachelors and old maids most profited by? Learning
-to <em>go alone</em>.</p>
-
-<p>54. When is a wineglass like an accomplished
-prediction? When it is fulfilled (<em>full-filled</em>).</p>
-
-<p>55. Which of the heathen gods is most resorted
-to in sickness? Mercury.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum">[7]</span></p>
-
-<p>56. Why is the letter E like death? Because it
-is the end of life.</p>
-
-<p>57. Why is a lady in a cotton dress like anything
-published? Because she appears in <em>print</em>.</p>
-
-<p>58. What parts of speech are shopkeepers most
-anxious to dispose of? Articles.</p>
-
-<p>59. Why are weary persons like carriage
-wheels? Because they are tired.</p>
-
-<p>60. When is a door not a door? When it’s
-ajar.</p>
-
-<p>61. What is that which we all eat and drink,
-though it is sometimes a woman and sometimes a
-man? A toast.</p>
-
-<p>62. Why would a tanner make a good chemist?
-Because he understands oxides (<em>ox hides</em>).</p>
-
-<p>63. Why is Ireland like a bottle of wine? Because
-it has <em>Cork</em> in it.</p>
-
-<p>64. Send 12 cents in stamps to Rex Company,
-Box 494, Philadelphia, Pa., and you will receive
-one package of tea, one silver plated thimble, one
-Colorado gold pen and one gold watch chain.
-Don’t miss this great offer.</p>
-
-<p>65. Why is a well trained horse like a benevolent
-man? Because it stops at the sound of woe
-(<em>whoa</em>).</p>
-
-<p>66. Why is the port of New Haven like a very
-wonderful phenomenon in acoustics? Because it
-includes a part of the sea, called the Sound; and
-<em>that</em> is the only <em>sound</em> that you can <em>see</em>.</p>
-
-<p>67. When may a man be considered to be really
-over head and ears in debt? When he owes for
-his wig.</p>
-
-
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop">
-
-<div class="chapter">
-<h2 class="nobreak">A Batch of Puzzles.</h2>
-</div>
-
-
-<p class="center"><em>See Answers Following.</em></p>
-
-<p>1. The following letters are inscribed on a stone<span class="pagenum">[8]</span>
-tablet placed immediately above the Ten Commandments
-in a country church in the northwest
-of England, and are deciphered with only one
-letter:</p>
-
-<div class="poetry-container">
-<div class="poetry">
- <div class="stanza">
- <div class="verse indent2"> P R S V R Y P R F C T M N!</div>
- <div class="verse indent0">V R K P T H S P R C P T S T N.</div>
- </div>
-</div>
-</div>
-
-<p>2. If the <b>B</b> m t put some: but if the <b>B</b>.</p>
-
-<p>3. What difference is there between twice eight
-and fifty, and twice fifty-eight—and what is their
-product?</p>
-
-<p>4. In an army consisting of 187 squadrons of
-horse, each 157 men, and 207 battalions, each 560
-men—how many effective soldiers, supposing that
-in 7 hospitals there are 473 sick?</p>
-
-<p>5. The Spectator mentions a club of fat people,
-whose number was only 15, and yet weighed no
-less than 3 <a id="Ref_8" href="#BRef_8">tons</a>—what was the weight of each
-person?</p>
-
-<p>6. Three boys met a servant maid carrying
-apples to the market. The first took half what
-she had, but returned to her ten; the second took
-one-third, but returned two; and the third took
-away half those she had left, but returned her one.
-She had then twelve apples left—how many had
-she at first?</p>
-
-<p>7. A schoolmaster being asked how many
-scholars he had, said: “If I had as many, half as
-many, and one-quarter as many more, I should
-have 88”—how many had he?</p>
-
-<p>8. A person having about him a certain number
-of Portugal pieces, said: “If the third, fourth
-and sixth of them were added together, they
-would make 54.” I desire to know how many he
-had?</p>
-
-<p>9. A man overtaking a maid driving a flock of
-geese, said to her: “How do you do, sweetheart;
-where are you going with these 30 geese?” “No,<span class="pagenum">[9]</span>
-sir,” said she, “I have not 30; but if I had as many
-more, half as many more, and 5 geese besides, I
-should have 30.” How many had she?</p>
-
-<p>10. Three persons discoursing concerning their
-ages: says H, “I am 30 years of age;” says K, “I
-am as old as H, and one-fourth of L;” and says L,
-“I am as old as you both.” What was the age of
-each person?</p>
-
-<p>11. What is the difference between twice 8 and
-20, and twice 28; as also between twice 5 and 50,
-and twice 55?</p>
-
-<p>12. A schoolmaster being asked how many
-scholars he had, said if he had as many more,
-one-half as many, and one-fourth as many, he
-should have 99. How many had he?</p>
-
-<p>13. An ancient lady, being asked how old she
-was, to avoid a direct answer, said: “I have 9 children,
-and there are 3 years between the birth of
-each of them; the eldest was born when I was 19
-years old, which is now exactly the age of the
-youngest.” How old was the lady?</p>
-
-<p>14. A gentleman went to sea at 17 years of age;
-8 years after that he had a son born, who lived 40
-years, and died before his father; after whom the
-father lived twice twenty years, and then died
-also. What was the age of the father when he
-died?</p>
-
-<p>15. A person said he had 20 children, that it
-happened there was a year and a half between
-each of their ages; his eldest son was born when
-he was 24 years old, and the age of the youngest
-is 21. What was the father’s age?</p>
-
-<p>16. A sheepfold was robbed three nights successively;
-the first night one-half of the sheep were
-stolen and half a sheep more; the second night
-half the remainder were lost, and half a sheep
-more; the last night they took half that were left<span class="pagenum">[10]</span>
-and half a sheep more, by which time they were
-reduced to 20. How many were there at first?</p>
-
-<p>17. There are two numbers, the one 48, the
-other twice as much. What is the difference between
-their sum and difference?</p>
-
-<p>18. Two men depart both from one place, the
-one goes north the other south; the one goes 7
-miles and the other 11 miles a day. How far are
-they distant at the twelfth day of their departure?</p>
-
-<p>19.</p>
-
-<div class="poetry-container">
-<div class="poetry">
- <div class="stanza">
- <div class="verse indent0">When first the marriage knot was tied between my wife and me,</div>
- <div class="verse indent0">Her age did mine as far exceed, as three times three does three;</div>
- <div class="verse indent0">But when seven years, and half seven years, we man and wife had been,</div>
- <div class="verse indent0">My age came then as near to her’s as eight is to sixteen.</div>
- <div class="verse indent0">What was each of our ages when married?</div>
- </div>
-</div>
-</div>
-
-<p>20. If 12 oxen will eat 3 acres and one-third of
-grass in four weeks and 21 oxen will eat 10 acres
-in 9 weeks—how many oxen will eat 24 acres in 18
-weeks, the grass being allowed to grow uniformly?</p>
-
-<p>21. A lady was asked her age, who replied thus:</p>
-
-<div class="poetry-container">
-<div class="poetry">
- <div class="stanza">
- <div class="verse indent0">My age, if multiplied by three,</div>
- <div class="verse indent0">Two-sevenths of that product tripled be,</div>
- <div class="verse indent0">The square root of two-ninths of that is four—</div>
- <div class="verse indent0">Now tell my age, or never see me more.</div>
- </div>
-</div>
-</div>
-
-
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop">
-
-<div class="chapter">
-<h2 class="nobreak">Answers to Batch of Puzzles.</h2>
-</div>
-
-
-<p>1. The letter E.</p>
-
-<div class="poetry-container">
-<div class="poetry">
- <div class="stanza">
- <div class="verse indent0">“Persevere, ye perfect men!</div>
- <div class="verse indent1">Ever keep these precepts ten.”</div>
- </div>
-</div>
-</div>
-
-<p>2. If the grate be empty, put some coal on; but
-if the grate be full, stop.</p>
-
-<p>3. Difference 50, product 7656.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum">[11]</span></p>
-
-<p>4. 144808.</p>
-
-<p>5. 448 lbs.</p>
-
-<p>6. 40.</p>
-
-<p>7. 32.</p>
-
-<p>8. 72.</p>
-
-<p>9. 10.</p>
-
-<p>10. H 30, K 50 and L 80.</p>
-
-<p>11. 20 and 50.</p>
-
-<p>12. 36.</p>
-
-<p>13. 62.</p>
-
-<p>14. 114.</p>
-
-<p>15. <span class="nowrap">73 <span class="fnum">1</span>/<span class="fden">2</span></span> years.</p>
-
-<p>16. <a id="Ref_11" href="#BRef_11">107</a>.</p>
-
-<p>17. 96.</p>
-
-<p>18. 216 miles.</p>
-
-<p>19. <span class="nowrap">10 <span class="fnum">1</span>/<span class="fden">2</span></span> years the man, <span class="nowrap">31 <span class="fnum">1</span>/<span class="fden">2</span></span> years the woman.</p>
-
-<p>20. 30.</p>
-
-<p>21. 28 years.</p>
-
-
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop">
-
-<div class="chapter">
-<h2 class="nobreak">Arithmetical Puzzle.</h2>
-</div>
-
-
-<div class="poetry-container">
-<div class="poetry">
- <div class="stanza">
- <div class="verse indent0">The sum of four figures, in value will be</div>
- <div class="verse indent0">Above seven thousand, nine hundred and three;</div>
- <div class="verse indent0">But when they are halved, you’ll find very fair</div>
- <div class="verse indent0">The sum will be nothing, in truth I declare.</div>
- </div>
-</div>
-</div>
-
-
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop">
-
-<div class="chapter">
-<h2 class="nobreak">Answer to Arithmetical Puzzle.</h2>
-</div>
-
-
-<p>The four figures are 8888, which, being divided
-by a line drawn through the middle, becomes</p>
-
-<p class="center">0000<br>
-0000
-</p>
-
-<p>the sum of which is eight 0s, or nothing.</p>
-
-<p>Send 12 cents to the firm from whom you received
-this book, and get the Marvelous Package
-of Games, including checkers, dominoes, authors,
-etc. Biggest bargain lot of Games ever offered.</p>
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop">
-
-<div class="chapter">
-<p><span class="pagenum">[12]</span></p>
-
-<h2 class="nobreak">Magic Age Table.</h2>
-</div>
-
-
-<div class="center">
-<table style="border:0em; padding:0em; border-spacing:0em">
-<tr><td class="tdr">1</td><td class="tdr">2</td><td class="tdr">4</td><td class="tdr">8</td><td class="tdr">16</td><td class="tdr">32</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">3</td><td class="tdr">3</td><td class="tdr">5</td><td class="tdr">9</td><td class="tdr">17</td><td class="tdr">33</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">5</td><td class="tdr">6</td><td class="tdr">6</td><td class="tdr">10</td><td class="tdr">19</td><td class="tdr">34</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">7</td><td class="tdr">7</td><td class="tdr">7</td><td class="tdr">11</td><td class="tdr">18</td><td class="tdr">35</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">9</td><td class="tdr">10</td><td class="tdr">12</td><td class="tdr">12</td><td class="tdr">20</td><td class="tdr">36</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">11</td><td class="tdr">11</td><td class="tdr">13</td><td class="tdr">13</td><td class="tdr">21</td><td class="tdr">37</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">13</td><td class="tdr">14</td><td class="tdr">14</td><td class="tdr">14</td><td class="tdr">22</td><td class="tdr">38</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">15</td><td class="tdr">15</td><td class="tdr">15</td><td class="tdr">15</td><td class="tdr">23</td><td class="tdr">39</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">17</td><td class="tdr">18</td><td class="tdr">20</td><td class="tdr">24</td><td class="tdr">24</td><td class="tdr">40</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">19</td><td class="tdr">19</td><td class="tdr">21</td><td class="tdr">25</td><td class="tdr">25</td><td class="tdr">41</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">21</td><td class="tdr">22</td><td class="tdr">22</td><td class="tdr">26</td><td class="tdr">26</td><td class="tdr">42</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">23</td><td class="tdr">23</td><td class="tdr">23</td><td class="tdr">27</td><td class="tdr">27</td><td class="tdr">43</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">25</td><td class="tdr">26</td><td class="tdr">28</td><td class="tdr">28</td><td class="tdr">28</td><td class="tdr">44</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">27</td><td class="tdr">27</td><td class="tdr">29</td><td class="tdr">29</td><td class="tdr">29</td><td class="tdr">45</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">29</td><td class="tdr">30</td><td class="tdr">30</td><td class="tdr">30</td><td class="tdr">30</td><td class="tdr">46</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">31</td><td class="tdr">31</td><td class="tdr">31</td><td class="tdr">31</td><td class="tdr">31</td><td class="tdr">47</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">33</td><td class="tdr">34</td><td class="tdr">36</td><td class="tdr">40</td><td class="tdr">48</td><td class="tdr">48</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">35</td><td class="tdr">35</td><td class="tdr">37</td><td class="tdr">41</td><td class="tdr">49</td><td class="tdr">49</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">37</td><td class="tdr">38</td><td class="tdr">38</td><td class="tdr">42</td><td class="tdr">50</td><td class="tdr">50</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">39</td><td class="tdr">38</td><td class="tdr">39</td><td class="tdr">43</td><td class="tdr">51</td><td class="tdr">51</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">41</td><td class="tdr">42</td><td class="tdr">44</td><td class="tdr">44</td><td class="tdr">52</td><td class="tdr">52</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">43</td><td class="tdr">43</td><td class="tdr">45</td><td class="tdr">45</td><td class="tdr">53</td><td class="tdr">53</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">45</td><td class="tdr">46</td><td class="tdr">46</td><td class="tdr">46</td><td class="tdr">54</td><td class="tdr">54</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">47</td><td class="tdr">47</td><td class="tdr">47</td><td class="tdr">47</td><td class="tdr">55</td><td class="tdr">55</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">49</td><td class="tdr">50</td><td class="tdr">52</td><td class="tdr">56</td><td class="tdr">56</td><td class="tdr">56</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">51</td><td class="tdr">51</td><td class="tdr">53</td><td class="tdr">57</td><td class="tdr">57</td><td class="tdr">57</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">53</td><td class="tdr">54</td><td class="tdr">54</td><td class="tdr">58</td><td class="tdr">58</td><td class="tdr">58</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">55</td><td class="tdr">55</td><td class="tdr">55</td><td class="tdr">59</td><td class="tdr">59</td><td class="tdr">59</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">57</td><td class="tdr">58</td><td class="tdr">60</td><td class="tdr">60</td><td class="tdr">60</td><td class="tdr">60</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">59</td><td class="tdr">59</td><td class="tdr">61</td><td class="tdr">61</td><td class="tdr">61</td><td class="tdr">61</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">61</td><td class="tdr">62</td><td class="tdr">62</td><td class="tdr">62</td><td class="tdr">62</td><td class="tdr">62</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdr">63</td><td class="tdr">63</td><td class="tdr">63</td><td class="tdr">63</td><td class="tdr">63</td><td class="tdr">63</td></tr>
-</table></div>
-
-
-<p><span class="smcap">Key To Table.</span>—Add together the figures at the
-top of each column in which the age is found and
-the sum will be the age sought. Example: Hand<span class="pagenum">[13]</span>
-the table to a lady and request her to tell you in
-which column or columns her age is found; if she
-says the first, second and fifth, you can say it is 19
-by mentally adding together the first figures of
-those three columns, and so on for any age up to 63.</p>
-
-
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop">
-
-<div class="chapter">
-<h2 class="nobreak">Cracked Nuts.</h2>
-</div>
-
-
-<p>“Parlor Matches”—Courting in the front room.</p>
-
-<p>All men are not homeless, but some are home
-less than others.</p>
-
-<p>A young Oil City gent calls his girl revenge, because
-she is sweet.</p>
-
-<p>When is a small baby like a big banker? When
-he is a wroth-child.</p>
-
-<p>Before slates were used people multiplied on the
-face of the earth.</p>
-
-<p>How may a man always become four-handed?
-By doubling his fists.</p>
-
-<p>The economical baby puts its toes in its mouth
-to make both ends meet.</p>
-
-<p>There’s nothing boisterous about the love for
-whiskey—it’s a still affection.</p>
-
-<p>Why is a situation of great trust like a back
-tooth? Because it is hard to fill.</p>
-
-<p>In art matters the education of the eye, of
-course, includes the proper treatment of the
-pupils.</p>
-
-<p>Why are balloons in the air like vagabonds?
-Because they have no visible means of support.</p>
-
-<p>Jones calls his dog Hickory, because he has a
-rough bark.</p>
-
-<p>The only perpetual thing about perpetual motion
-is its failure.</p>
-
-<p>Some shoemakers are notoriously long-lived—the
-lasters, for instance.</p>
-
-<p>Billiards must be an easy game, for it’s mostly
-done on cushions.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum">[14]</span></p>
-
-<p>Ricrac is a tidy affair.—<cite>Barber’s Gazette.</cite></p>
-
-<p>Domestic “sauce” is kept in family jars.</p>
-
-<p>Bronze is a very fashionable hue nowadays, but
-brass has not entirely gone out.</p>
-
-<p>The <cite>Barber’s Gazette</cite>, of New York City, has
-failed. It was strapped. Next!</p>
-
-<p>A man with a noisy dog calls him “Tree,” because
-all the bark is on the outside.</p>
-
-<p>Society is a fraction whose numerator is clothes
-and whose denominator is cash.</p>
-
-<p>To introduce our celebrated Perfume, we will
-send a case postpaid, for 12 cents. We will mail
-with it, <em>absolutely free</em>, a beautiful gold plated
-Garnet and Opal ring. Send 12 cents in stamps
-and we will surprise and delight you. Address:
-W. S. Everett &amp; Co., Lynn, Mass.</p>
-
-<p>Flats are growing popular in New York. New
-York “flats” are unpopular the country over.</p>
-
-<p>We fear the Montreal courts will hold that the
-matter of compulsory vaccination is ultra virus.</p>
-
-<p>It is generally when you are not looking out for
-a woman that you get on her trail.</p>
-
-<p>The best telephone bell—The hello girl at the
-other end of the line.</p>
-
-<p>The poetry of motion—A picnic girl with a bug
-down her back.</p>
-
-<p>In some of our down town restaurants, macadamized
-pie crust seems to be very popular.</p>
-
-<p>The letter D is truly an old salt—been following
-the C for years.</p>
-
-<p>“How to get fat”—Go to the butcher shop and
-purchase it by the pound.</p>
-
-<p>The expense of evening walks is diminished now
-that ice cream has been called in.</p>
-
-<p>A classical farmer in Burlington Township
-names all his pigs after the Greek roots.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum">[15]</span></p>
-
-<p>Approaching a Crisis—Walking toward a restless
-girl baby.</p>
-
-<p>A Boston girl visiting in Danbury claims to
-wear limbbings during severe weather.</p>
-
-<p>Blessed is the man who loveth his wife’s relations;
-and not only blessed, but also scarce.</p>
-
-<p>Love laughs at locksmiths, but we defy anybody
-or anything to laugh at a plumber.</p>
-
-<p>The <cite>Rochester Express</cite> complains that the mornings
-get up too early.</p>
-
-<p>The difference between a woman and an umbrella
-is, that you can shut up an umbrella.</p>
-
-<p>Youth—“Pa, give me an example of a ‘floating
-debt.’” Pa—(sadly)—“My yacht.”</p>
-
-<p>A cold wave—The preliminary flourish of the
-handkerchief.</p>
-
-<p>A goose is an inoffensive fowl, and yet everybody
-gets down on her.</p>
-
-<p>When a man bows assent to what you are saying
-he stoops to concur.</p>
-
-<p>If you lack pluck, just eat buckwheat cakes.
-They’ll make you come to the scratch.</p>
-
-<p>The church festival season is nearly over, and
-the solitary oyster will soon be out of his stew.</p>
-
-<p>Talk is cheap, but the love prattle of a pretty
-girl is dear.</p>
-
-<p>A flirt’s heart is like an omnibus—it always has
-room for one more.</p>
-
-<p>He was “Claude” before he married her, and
-they say he was more clawed afterward.</p>
-
-<p>He—“The music was so loud that I couldn’t hear
-myself talk.” She (bored)—“Oh, how nice!”</p>
-
-<p>Slight of Hand—Refusing a marriage proposal.</p>
-
-<p>It takes a Japanese girl <a id="Ref_13a" href="#BRef_13a">thirteen</a> hours to dress
-for a party.</p>
-
-<p>Sweetening one’s <a id="Ref_13b" href="#BRef_13b">coffee is the first stirring event</a>
-of the day.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum">[16]</span></p>
-
-<p>Free! We will send you an elegant large magazine
-6 months, free, if you send 10 cents to have
-your name and address inserted in our Directory,
-which goes to over 1000 publishers, importers, etc.,
-who will send you samples of new goods, latest
-books, newspapers, catalogues, etc. You will get
-a big mail daily. All at a cost of 10 cents. W. S.
-Everett &amp; Co., Publishers, Lynn, Mass.</p>
-
-<p>A lightning express would be unsafe were it not
-for the conductor.</p>
-
-<p>Whatever the season, a gymnast wears both
-spring and fall clothing.</p>
-
-<p>It is beauty’s privilege to kill time, and time’s
-privilege to kill beauty.</p>
-
-<p>“I am climbin’ the ’ill of experience,” as the
-boy said who was made sick by smoking.</p>
-
-<p>Strange behavior—A vessel “hugging” the coast.</p>
-
-<p>What is the great want of the age?—Want of
-funds.</p>
-
-<p>When is the water most liable to escape?—When
-it is only half tide.</p>
-
-<p>The violinist who “carried the house by storm”
-used a rain bow afterward.</p>
-
-<p>Even a clothes line becomes unsteady when it
-has too many sheets in the wind.</p>
-
-<p>“Mankind,” said the preacher, “includes woman;
-for man embraces woman.”</p>
-
-<p>When is a ship like a dressmaker?—When she’s
-rounding the Cape or tacking about.</p>
-
-<p>“The only way to look at a lady’s faults,” exclaimed
-a gallant, “is to shut your eyes.”</p>
-
-<p>“Cutter &amp; Fitts” are said to be the names of the
-fashionable dressmakers in New York.</p>
-
-<p>Handsome is as handsome drives without upsetting
-the hansom.</p>
-
-<p>Those who toil and spin—The bicycle riders.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb x-ebookmaker-drop">
-
-<div class="chapter">
-<div class="transnote">
-<h2 style="margin-top: 0em">Transcriber’s Notes:</h2>
-
-<p>Punctuation has been made consistent.</p>
-
-<p>Variations in spelling and hyphenation were retained as they appear in
-the original publication, except that obvious typographical errors
-have been corrected.</p>
-
-<p>The following changes were made:</p>
-
-<p id="BRef_8"><a href="#Ref_8">p. 8</a>: In question 5, “tons” means “long tons” (than 3 tons).</p>
-
-<p id="BRef_11"><a href="#Ref_11">p. 11</a>: The correct answer to question 16 is 167 (16. 107.).</p>
-
-<p id="BRef_13a"><a href="#Ref_13a">p. 13</a>: Partially illegible word assumed to be “thirteen” (girl thirteen
-hours).</p>
-
-<p id="BRef_13b"><a href="#Ref_13b">p. 13</a>: Partially illegible phrase assumed to be “coffee is the first
-stirring event” (Sweetening one’s coffee is the first stirring event of).</p>
-</div></div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin-top:4em'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK NUTS TO CRACK, MULTUM IN PARVO LIBRARY, V. 2, NO. 20, AUGUST 1895 ***</div>
-<div style='text-align:left'>
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