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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/7057-8.txt b/7057-8.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..a429704 --- /dev/null +++ b/7057-8.txt @@ -0,0 +1,4488 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of David Poindexter's Disappearance and Other +Tales, by Julian Hawthorne + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: David Poindexter's Disappearance and Other Tales + +Author: Julian Hawthorne + +Posting Date: October 7, 2012 [EBook #7057] +Release Date: December, 2004 +First Posted: March 3, 2003 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE *** + + + + +Produced by Michelle Shephard, Eric Eldred, Charles Franks +and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team + + + + + + + + + + + +DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE _AND OTHER TALES_ + +BY JULIAN HAWTHORNE + + + + +CONTENTS. + + + DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE + KEN'S MYSTERY + "WHEN HALF-GODS GO, THE GODS ARRIVE" + "SET NOT THY FOOT ON GRAVES" + MY FRIEND PATON + + + + +DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE. + + +Among the records of the English state trials are to be found many +strange stories, which would, as the phrase is, make the fortune of a +modern novelist. But there are also numerous cases, not less +stimulating to imagination and curiosity, which never attained more +than local notoriety, of which the law was able to take but +comparatively small cognizance, although they became subjects of much +unofficial discussion and mystification. Among these cases none, +perhaps, is better worth recalling than that of David Poindexter. It +will be my aim here to tell the tale as simply and briefly as +possible--to repeat it, indeed, very much as it came to my ears while +living, several years ago, near the scene in which its events took +place. There is a temptation to amplify it, and to give it a more +recent date and a different setting; but (other considerations aside) +the story might lose in force and weight more than it would thereby +gain in artistic balance and smoothness. + +David Poindexter was a younger son of an old and respected family in +Sussex, England. He was born in London in 1785. He was educated at +Oxford, with a view to his entering the clerical profession, and in the +year 1810 he obtained a living in the little town of Witton, near +Twickenham, known historically as the home of Sir John Suckling. The +Poindexters had been much impoverished by the excesses of David's +father and grandfather, and David seems to have had few or no resources +beyond the very modest stipend appertaining to his position. He was, at +all events, poor, though possessed of capacities which bade fair to +open to him some of the higher prizes of his calling; but, on the other +hand, there is evidence that he chafed at his poverty, and reason to +believe that he had inherited no small share of the ill-regulated +temperament which had proved so detrimental to the elder generations of +his family. + +Personally he was a man of striking aspect, having long, dark hair, +heavily-marked eyebrows, and blue eyes; his mouth and chin were +graceful in contour, but wanting in resolution; his figure was tall, +well knit, and slender. He was an eloquent preacher, and capable, when +warmed by his subject, of powerfully affecting the emotions of his +congregation. He was a great favorite with women--whom, however, he +uniformly treated with coldness--and by no means unpopular with men, +toward some of whom he manifested much less reserve. Nevertheless, +before the close of the second year of his incumbency he was known to +be paying his addresses to a young lady of the neighborhood, Miss Edith +Saltine, the only child of an ex-army officer. The colonel was a +widower, and in poor health, and since he was living mainly on his +half-pay, and had very little to give his daughter, the affair was +looked upon as a love match, the rather since Edith was a handsome +young woman of charming character. The Reverend David Poindexter +certainly had every appearance of being deeply in love; and it is often +seen that the passions of reserved men, when once aroused, are stronger +than those of persons more generally demonstrative. + +Colonel Saltine did not at first receive his proposed son-in-law with +favor. He was a valetudinarian, and accustomed to regard his daughter +as his nurse by right, and he resented the idea of her leaving him +forlorn for the sake of a good-looking parson. It is very likely that +his objections might have had the effect of breaking off the match, for +his daughter was devotedly attached to him, and hardly questioned his +right to dispose of her as he saw fit; but after a while the worthy +gentleman seems to have thought better of his contrariness. Poindexter +had strong persuasive powers, and no doubt made himself personally +agreeable to the colonel, and, moreover, it was arranged that the +latter should occupy the same house with Mr. and Mrs. Poindexter after +they were married. Nevertheless, the colonel was not a man to move +rapidly, and the engagement had worn along for nearly a year without +the wedding-day having been fixed. One winter evening in the early part +of December, Poindexter dined with the colonel and Edith, and as the +gentlemen were sitting over their wine the lover spoke on the topic +that was uppermost in his thoughts, and asked his host whether there +was any good reason why the marriage should not be consummated at once. + +"Christmas is at hand," the young man remarked; "why should it not be +rendered doubly memorable by granting this great boon?" + +"For a parson, David, you are a deuced impatient man," the colonel said. + +"Parsons are human," the other exclaimed with warmth. + +"Humph! I suppose some of them are. In fact, David, if I didn't believe +that there was something more in you than texts and litanies and the +Athanasian creed, I'll be hanged if I'd ever have let you look twice at +Edith. That girl has got blood in her veins, David; she's not to be +thrown away on any lantern-jawed, white-livered doctor of souls, I can +tell you." + +David held his head down, and seemed not to intend a reply; but he +suddenly raised his eyes, and fixed them upon the colonel's. "You know +what my father was," he said, in a low, distinct voice; "I am my +father's son." + +"That idea has occurred to me more than once, David, and to say the +truth, I've liked you none the less for it. But, then, what the deuce +should a fellow like you want to do in a pulpit? I respect the cloth as +much as any man, I hope, but leaving theory aside, and coming down to +practice, aren't there fools and knaves enough in the world to carry on +that business, without a fellow of heart and spirit like you going into +it?" + +"Theory or no theory, there have been as great men in the pulpit as in +any other position," said David, gloomily. + +"I don't say to the contrary: ecclesiastical history, and all that: but +what I do say is, if a man is great in the pulpit, it's a pity he isn't +somewhere else, where he could use his greatness to more advantage." + +"Well," remarked David, in the same somber tone, "I am not contented: +so much I can admit to the father of the woman I love. But you know as +well as I do that men nowadays are called to my profession not so much +by the Divine summons as by the accident of birth. Were it not for the +law of primogeniture, Colonel Saltine, the Church of England would be, +for the most part, a congregation without a clergyman." + +"Gad! I'm much of your opinion," returned the colonel, with a grin; +"but there are two doors, you know, for a second son to enter the world +by. If he doesn't fancy a cassock, he can put on His Majesty's uniform." + +"Neither the discipline nor the activity of a soldier's life would suit +me," David answered. "So far as I know my own nature, what it craves is +freedom, and the enjoyment of its capacities. Only under such +conditions could I show what I am capable of. In other words," he +added, with a short laugh, "ten thousand a year is the profession I +should choose." + +"Ah," murmured the colonel, heaving a sigh, "I doubt that's a +profession we'd all of us like to practice as well as preach. What! no +more wine? Oh, ay, Edith, of course! Well, go to her, sir, if you must; +but when you come to my age you'll have found out which wears the +best--woman or the bottle. I'll join you presently, and maybe we'll see +what can be done about this marrying business." + +So David went to Edith, and they had a clear hour together before they +heard the colonel's slippered tread hobbling through the hall. Just +before he opened the door, David had said: "I sometimes doubt whether +you wholly love me, after all." And she had answered: + +"If I do not, it is because I sometimes feel as if you were not your +real self." + +The colonel heard nothing of this odd bit of dialogue; but when he had +subsided, with his usual grunt, into his arm-chair beside the +fire-place, and Edith had brought him his foot-stool and his pipe, and +pat the velvet skull cap on his bald pate, he drew a long whiff of +tobacco smoke, and said: + +"If you young folks want to set up housekeeping a month from to-day, +you can do it, for all I care." + +Little did any one of the three suspect what that month was destined to +bring forth. + +David Poindexter's father had been married twice, his second wife dying +within a year of her wedding-day, and two weeks after bringing David +into the world. This lady, whose maiden name was Lambert, had a brother +who was a gentleman farmer, and a tolerably successful one. His farm +was situated in the parish of Witton, and he owned a handsome house on +the outskirts of the town itself. He and David's father had been at one +time great friends, insomuch that David was named after him, and +Lambert, as his godfather as well as uncle, presented the child with +the usual silver mug. Lambert was never known to have married, but +there were rumors, dating as far as back David's earliest +recollections, to the effect that he had entertained a secret and +obscure passion for some foreign woman of great beauty, but of doubtful +character and antecedents. Nobody could be found who had ever seen this +woman, or would accept the responsibility of asserting that she +actually existed; but she afforded a convenient means of accounting for +many things that seemed mysterious in Mr. Lambert's conduct. At length, +when David was about eight years old, his godfather left England +abruptly, and without telling any one whither he was going or when he +would return. As a matter of fact he never did return, nor had any +certain news ever been heard of him since his departure. Neither his +house nor his farm was ever sold, however, though they were rented to +more than one tenant during a number of years. It was said, also, that +Lambert held possession of some valuable real estate in London. +Nevertheless, in process of time he was forgotten, or remembered only +as a name. And the new generation of men, though they might speak of +"the old Lambert House," neither knew nor cared how it happened to have +that title. For aught they could tell, it might have borne it ever +since Queen Elizabeth's time. Even David Poindexter had long ceased to +think of his uncle as anything much more substantial than a dream. + +He was all the more surprised, therefore, when, on the day following +the interview just mentioned, he received a letter from the late David +Lambert's lawyers. It informed him in substance that his uncle had died +in Constantinople, unmarried (so far as could be ascertained), +intestate, and without blood-relations surviving him. Under these +circumstances, his property, amounting to one hundred and sixty +thousand pounds, the bulk of which was invested in land and houses in +the city of London, as well as the country-seat in Witton known as the +old Lambert House, and the farm lands thereto appertaining--all this +wealth, not to mention four or five thousand pounds in ready money, +came into possession of the late David Lambert's nearest of kin, who, +as it appeared, was none other than the Reverend David Poindexter. +"Would that gentleman, therefore be kind enough, at his convenience, to +advise his obedient servants as to what disposition he wished to make +of his inheritance?" + +It was a Saturday morning, and the young clergyman was sitting at his +study table; the fire was burning in the grate at his right hand, and +his half-written sermon lay on the desk before him. After reading the +letter, at first hurriedly and amazedly, afterward more slowly, with +frequent pauses, he folded it up, and, still holding it in his hand, +leaned back in his chair, and remained for the better part of an hour +in a state of deep preoccupation. Many changing expressions passed +across his face, and glowed in his dark-blue eyes, and trembled on the +curves of his lips. At last he roused himself, sat erect, and smote the +table violently with his clinched hand. Yes, it was true it was real; +he, David Poindexter, an hour ago the poor imprisoned clergyman of the +Church of England--he, as by a stroke of magic, was free, powerful, +emancipated, the heir of seven thousand pounds a year! And what about +tomorrow's sermon? + +He rose up smiling, with a vivid color in his cheeks and a bright +sparkle in his eyes. He stretched himself to his full height, threw out +his arms, and smote his chest with both fists. What a load was gone +from his heart! What a new ardor of life was this that danced in his +veins! He walked with long strides to the window, and threw it wide +open, breathing in the rush of bright icy air with deep inhalations. +Freedom! emancipation! Yonder, above the dark, level boughs of the +cedar of Lebanon, rose the square, gray tower of the church. Yesterday +it was the incubus of his vain hopes; to-day it was the tomb of a dead +and despised past. What had David Poindexter to do with calling sinners +to repentance? Let him first find out for himself what sin was like. +Then he looked to the right, where between the leafless trees Colonel +Saltine's little dwelling raised its red-tile roof above the high +garden-wall. And so, Edith, you doubted whether I were at all times my +real self? You shall not need to make that complaint hereafter. As for +to-morrow's sermon--I am not he who wrote sermons, nor shall I ever +preach any. Away with it, therefore! + +He strode back to the table, took up the sheets of manuscript from the +desk, tore them across, and laid them on the burning coals. They +smoldered for a moment, then blazed up, and the draught from the open +window whisked the blackened ashes up the chimney. David stood, +meanwhile, with his arms folded, smiling to himself, and repeating, in +a low voice: + +"Never again--never again--never again." + +By-and-by he reseated himself at his desk, and hurriedly wrote two or +three notes, one of which was directed to Miss Saltine. He gave them to +his servant with an injunction to deliver them at their addresses +during the afternoon. Looking at his watch, he was surprised to find +that it was already past twelve o'clock. He went up-stairs, packed a +small portmanteau, made some changes in his dress, and came down again +with a buoyant step. There was a decanter half full of sherry on the +sideboard in the dining-room; he poured out and drank two glasses in +succession. This done, he put on his hat, and left the house with his +portmanteau in his hand, and ten minutes later he had intercepted the +London coach, and was bowling along on his way to the city. + +There was a dramatic instinct in David, as in many eloquent men of +impressionable temperament, which caused him every now and then to look +upon all that was occurring as a sort of play, and to resolve to act +his part in a telling and picturesque manner. On that Saturday +afternoon he had an interview with the late Mr. Lambert's lawyers, and +they were struck by his calm, lofty, and indifferent bearing. He seemed +to regard worldly prosperity as a thing beneath him, yet to feel in a +half-impatient way the responsibility which the control of wealth +forced upon him. + +"It is my purpose not to allow this legacy to interfere permanently +with my devotion to my higher duties," he remarked, "but I have taken +measures to enable myself to place these affairs upon a fixed and +convenient footing. I presume," he added, fixing his eyes steadily upon +his interlocutor, "that you have thoroughly investigated the +possibility of there being any claimant nearer than myself?" + +"No such claimant could exist," the lawyer replied, "unless the late +Mr. Lambert had married and had issue." + +"Is there, then, any reason to suppose that he contemplated the +contingency that has happened?" + +"If he bestowed any thought at all upon the subject, that contingency +could hardly have failed to present itself to his mind," the lawyer +answered. + +David consented to receive the draft for a thousand pounds which was +tendered him, and took his leave. He returned to his rooms at the +Tavistock Hotel, Covent Garden. In the evening, after making some +changes in his costume, he went to the theatre, and saw Kean play +something of Shakespeare's. When the play was over, and he was out in +the frosty air again, he felt it impossible to sleep. It was after +midnight before he returned to his hotel, with flushed cheeks, and a +peculiar brilliance in his eyes. He slept heavily, but awoke early in +the morning with a slight feeling of feverishness. It was Sunday +morning. He thought of his study in the parsonage at Witton, with its +bright fire, its simplicity, its repose. He thought of the church, and +of the congregation which he would never face again. And Edith--what +had been her thoughts and dreams during the night? He got up, and went +to the window. It looked out upon a narrow, inclosed court. The sky was +dingy, the air was full of the muffled tumult of the city. His present +state, as to its merely external aspect, was certainly not so agreeable +as that of the morning before. Ay, but what a vista had opened now +which then was closed! David dressed himself, and went down to his +breakfast. While sitting at his table in the window, looking out upon +the market-place, and stirring his cup of Mocha, a gentleman came up +and accosted him. + +"Am I mistaken, or is your name Poindexter?" + +David looked up, and recognized Harwood Courtney, a son of Lord +Derwent. Courtney was a man of fashion, a member of the great clubs, +and a man, as they say, with a reputation. He was a good twenty years +older than David, and had been the companion of the latter's father in +some of his wildest escapades. To David, at this moment, he was the +representative and symbol of that great, splendid, unregenerate world, +with which it was his purpose to make acquaintance. + +"You are not mistaken, Mr. Courtney," he said, quietly. "Have you +breakfasted? It is some time since we have met." + +"Why, yes, egad! If I remember right, you were setting out on another +road than that which I was travelling. However, we sinners, you know, +depend upon you parsons to pull us up in time to prevent any--er--any +_very_ serious catastrophe! Ha! ha!" + +"I understand you; but for my part I have left the pulpit," said David, +uttering the irrevocable words with a carelessness which he himself +wondered at. + +"By Jove!" exclaimed Courtney, with a little intonation of surprise and +curiosity, which his good breeding prevented him from formulating more +explicitly. As David made no rejoinder, he presently continued: +"Then--er--perhaps you might find it in your way to dine with me this +evening. Only one or two friends--a very quiet Sunday party." + +"Thank you," said David. "I had intended going to bed betimes to-night; +but it will give me pleasure to meet a quiet party." + +"Then that's settled," exclaimed Courtney; "and meanwhile, if you've +finished your coffee, what do you say to a turn in the Row? I've got my +trap here, and a breath of air will freshen us up." + +David and Courtney spent the day together, and by evening the young +ex-clergyman had made the acquaintance of many of the leading men about +town. He had also allowed the fact to transpire that his pecuniary +standing was of the soundest kind; but this was done so +skillfully--with such a lofty air--that even Courtney, who was as +cynical as any man, was by no means convinced that David's change of +fortune had anything to do with his relinquishing the pulpit. + +"David Poindexter is no fool," he remarked, confidentially, to a +friend. "He has double the stuff in him that the old fellow had. You +must get up early to get the better of a man who has been a parson, and +seen through himself!" + +David, in fact, felt himself the superior, intellectually and by +nature, of most of the men he saw. He penetrated and comprehended them, +but to them he was impenetrable; a certain air of authority rested upon +him; he had abandoned the service of God; but the training whereby he +had fitted himself for it stood him in good stead; it had developed his +insight, his subtlety, and, strange to say, his powers of +dissimulation. Contrary to what is popularly supposed, his study of the +affairs of the other world had enabled him to deal with this world's +affairs with a half-contemptuous facility. As for the minor +technicalities, the social pass-words, and so forth, to which much +importance is generally ascribed, David had nothing to fear from them; +first, because he was a man of noble manners, naturally as well as by +cultivation; and, secondly, because the fact that he had been a +clergyman acted as a sort of breastplate against criticism. It would be +thought that he chose to appear ignorant of that which he really knew. + +As for Mr. Courtney's dinner, though it may doubtless have been a quiet +one from his point of view, it differed considerably from such Sunday +festivities as David had been accustomed to. A good deal of wine was +drunk, and the conversation (a little cautious at first, on David's +account) gradually thawed into freedom. It was late when they rose from +table; and then a proposition was made to go to a certain well-known +club in St. James's Street. David went with the rest, and, for the +first time in his life, played cards for money; he lost seven hundred +pounds--more money than he had handled during the last three years--but +he kept his head, and at three o'clock in the morning drove with +Courtney to the latter's lodgings, with five hundred pounds in his +pocket over and above the sum with which he had begun to play. Here was +a wonderful change in his existence; but it did not seem to him half so +wonderful as his reason told him it was. It seemed natural--as if, +after much wandering, he had at last found his way into the place where +he belonged. It is said that savages, educated from infancy amid +civilized surroundings, will, on breathing once more their native air, +tear off their clothes and become savages again. Somewhat similar may +have been David's case, who, inheriting in a vivid degree the manly +instincts of his forefathers, had forcibly and by constraint of +circumstances lived a life wholly opposed to these impulses--an +artificial life, therefore. But now at length he had come into his +birthright, and felt at home. + +One episode of the previous evening remained in his memory: it had +produced an effect upon him out of proportion with its apparent +significance. A gentleman, a guest at the dinner, a small man with +sandy hair and keen gray eyes, on being presented to David had looked +at him with an expression of shrewd perplexity, and said: + +"Have we not met before?" + +"It is possible, but I confess I do not recollect it," replied David. + +"The name was not Poindexter," continued the other, "but the +face--pardon me--I could have taken my oath to." + +"Where did this meeting take place?" asked David, smiling. + +"In Paris, at ----'s," said the gray-eyed gentleman (mentioning the +name of a well-known French nobleman). + +"You are quite certain, of that?" + +"Yes. It was but a month since." + +"I was never in Paris. For three years I have hardly been out of sight +of London," David answered. "What was your friend's name?" + +"It has slipped my memory," he replied. "An Italian name, I fancy. But +he was a man--pardon me--of very striking appearance, and I conversed +with him for more than an hour." + +Now it is by no means an uncommon occurrence for two persons to bear a +close resemblance to each other, but (aside from the fact that David +was anything but an ordinary-looking man) this mistake of his new +acquaintance affected him oddly. He involuntarily associated it with +the internal and external transformation which had happened to him, and +said to himself: + +"This counterpart of mine was prophetic: he was what I am to be--what I +am." And fantastic though the notion was, he could not rid himself of +it. + +David returned to Witton about the middle of the week. In the interval +he had taken measures to make known to those concerned the revolution +of his affairs, and to have the old Lambert mansion opened, and put in +some sort of condition for his reception. He had gone forth on foot, an +unknown, poor, and humble clergyman; he returned driving behind a pair +of horses, by far the most important personage in the town; and yet +this outward change was far less great than the change within. His +reception could scarcely be called cordial; though not wanting in the +technical respect and ceremony due to him as a gentleman of wealth and +influence, he could perceive a half concealed suspense and misgiving, +due unmistakably to his attitude as a recreant clergyman. + +In fact, his worthy parishioners were in a terrible quandary how to +reconcile their desire to stand well with their richest +fellow-townsman, and their dismayed recognition of that townsman's +scandalous professional conduct. David smiled at this, but it made him +bitter too. He had intended once more to call the congregation +together, and frankly to explain to them the reasons, good or bad, +which had induced him to withdraw from active labor in the church. But +now he determined to preserve a proud and indifferent silence. There +was only one person who had a right to call him to account, and it was +not without fearfulness that he looked forward to his meeting with her. +However, the sooner such fears are put at rest the better, and he +called upon Edith on the evening of his arrival. Her father had been in +bed for two days with a cold, and she was sitting alone in the little +parlor. + +She rose at his entrance with a deep blush, and a look of mixed +gladness and anxiety. Her eyes swiftly noted the change in his dress, +for he had considerably modified, though not as yet wholly laid aside, +the external marks of his profession. She held back from him with a +certain strangeness and timidity, so that lie did not kiss her cheek, +but only her hand. The first words of greeting were constrained and +conventional, but at last he said: + +"All is changed, Edith, except our love for each other." + +"I do not hold you to that," she answered, quickly. + +"But you can not turn me from it," he said, with a smile. + +"I do not know you yet," said she, looking away. + +"When I last saw you, you said you doubted whether I were my real self. +I have become my real self since then." + +"Because you are not what you were, it does not follow that you are +what you should be." + +"Surely, Edith, that is not reasonable. I was what circumstances forced +me to be, henceforth I shall be what God made me." + +"Did God, then, have no hand in those circumstances?" + +"Not more, at all events, than in these." + +Edith shook her head. "God does not absolve us from holy vows." + +"But how if I can not, with loyalty to my inner conscience, hold to +those vows?" exclaimed David, with more warmth. "I have long felt that +I was not fitted for this sacred calling. Before the secret tribunal of +my self-knowledge, I have stood charged with the sin of hypocrisy. It +has been God's will that I be delivered from that sin." + +"Why did you not say that before, David?" she demanded, looking at him. +"Why did you remain a hypocrite until it was for your worldly benefit +to abandon your trust? Can you say, on your word of honor, that you +would stand where you do now if you were still poor instead of rich?" + +"Men's eyes are to some extent opened and their views are confirmed by +events. They make our dreams and forebodings into realities. We +question in our minds, and events give us the answers." + +"Such an argument might excuse any villainy," said Edith, lifting her +head indignantly. + +"Villainy! Do you use that word to me?" exclaimed David. + +"Not unless your own heart bids me--and I do not know your heart." + +"Because you do not love me?" + +"You may be right," replied Edith, striving to steady her voice; "but +at least I believed I loved you." + +"You are cured of that belief, it seems--as I am cured of many foolish +faiths," said David, with gloomy bitterness. "Well, so be it! The love +that waits upon a fastidious conscience is never the deepest love. My +love is not of that complexion. Were it possible that the shadow of +sin, or of crime itself, could descend upon you, it would but render +you dearer to me than before." + +"You may break my heart, David, if you will," cried the girl, +tremulously, yet resolutely, "but I reverence love more than I love +you." + +David had turned away as if to leave the room, but he paused and +confronted her once more. + +"At any rate, we will understand each other," said he. "Do you make it +your condition that I should go back to the ministry?" + +Edith was still seated, but the condition of the crisis compelled her +to rise. She stood before him, her dark eyes downcast, her lips +trembling, nervously drawing the fingers of one hand through the clasp +of the other. She was tempted to yield to him, for she could imagine no +happiness in life without him; but a rare sanity and integrity of mind +made her perceive that he had pushed the matter to a false alternative. +It was not a question of preaching or not preaching sermons, but of +sinful apostasy from an upright life. At last she raised her eyes, +which shone like dark jewels in her pale countenance, and said, slowly, +"We had better part." + +"Then my sins be upon your head!" cried David, passionately. + +The blood mounted to her cheeks at the injustice of this rejoinder, but +she either could not or would not answer again. She remained erect and +proud until the door had closed between them; what she did after that +neither David nor any one else knew. + +The apostate David seems to have determined that, if she were to bear +the burden of his sins, they should be neither few nor light. His life +for many weeks after this interview was a scandal and a disgrace. The +old Lambert mansion was the scene of carousals and excesses such as +recalled the exploits of the monks of Medmenham. Harwood Courtney, and +a score of dissolute gentlemen like him, not to speak of other +visitors, thronged the old house day and night; drinking, gaming, and +yet wilder doings gave the sober little town no rest, till the Reverend +David Poindexter was commonly referred to as the Wicked Parson. +Meanwhile Edith Saltine bore herself with a grave, pale impassiveness, +which some admired, others wondered at, and others deemed an indication +that she had no heart. If she had not, so much the better for her; for +her father was almost as difficult to manage as David himself. The old +gentleman could neither comprehend nor forgive what seemed to him his +daughter's immeasurable perversity. One day she had been all for +marrying a poor, unknown preacher; and the next day, when to marry him +meant to be the foremost lady in the neighborhood, she dismissed him +without appeal. And the worst of it was that, much as the poor +colonel's mouth watered at the feasts and festivities of the Lambert +mansion, he was prevented by the fatality of his position from taking +any part in them. So Edith could find no peace either at home or +abroad; and if it dwelt not in her own heart, she was indeed forlorn. + +What may have been the cost of all this dissipation it was difficult to +say, but several observant persons were of opinion that the parson's +income could not long stand it. There were rumors that he had heavy +bills owing in several quarters, which he could pay only by realizing +some of his investments. On the other hand, it was said that he played +high and constantly, and usually had the devil's luck. But it is +impossible to gauge the truth of such stories, and the Wicked Parson +himself took no pains either to deny or confirm them. He was always the +loudest, the gayest, and the most reckless of his company, and the +leader and inspirer of all their wild proceedings; but it was noticed +that, though he laughed often, he never smiled; and that his face, when +in repose, bore traces of anything but happiness. For some cause or +other, moreover--but whether maliciously or remorsefully was open to +question--he never entirely laid aside his clerical garb; he seemed +either to delight in profaning it, or to retain it as the reminder and +scourge of his own wickedness. + +One night there was a great gathering up at the mansion, and the noise +and music were kept up till well past the small hours of the morning. +Gradually the guests departed, some going toward London, some +elsewhere. At last only Harwood Courtney remained, and he and David sat +down in the empty dining-room, disorderly with the remains of the +carousal, to play picquet. They played, with short intermissions, for +nearly twenty-four hours. At last David threw down his cards, and said, +quietly: + +"Well, that's all. Give me until to-morrow." + +"With all the pleasure in life, my boy," replied the other; "and your +revenge, too, if you like. Meanwhile, the best thing we can do is to +take a nap." + +"You may do so if you please," said David; "for my part, I must take a +turn on horseback first. I can never sleep till I have breathed fresh +air." + +They parted accordingly, Courtney going to his room, and David to the +stables, whence he presently issued, mounted on his bay mare, and rode +eastward. On his way he passed Colonel Saltine's house, and drew rein +for a moment beside it, looking up at Edith's window. It was between +four and five o'clock of a morning in early April; the sky was clear, +and all was still and peaceful. As he sat in the saddle looking up, the +blind of the window was raised and the sash itself opened, and Edith, +in her white night-dress, with her heavy brown hair falling round her +face and on her shoulders, gazed out. She regarded him with a +half-bewildered expression, as if doubting of his reality, For a moment +they remained thus; then he waved his hand to her with a wild gesture +of farewell, and rode on, passing immediately out of sight behind the +dark foliage of the cedar of Lebanon. + +On reaching the London high-road the horseman paused once more, and +seemed to hesitate what course to pursue; but finally he turned to the +right, and rode in a southerly direction. The road wound gently, and +dipped and rose to cross low hills; trees bordered the way on each +side; and as the sun rose they threw long shadows westward, while the +birds warbled and twittered in the fields and hedges. By-and-by a clump +of woodland came into view about half a mile off, the road passing +through the midst of it. As David entered it at one end, he saw, +advancing toward him through the shade and sunlight, a rider mounted on +a black horse. The latter seemed to be a very spirited animal, and as +David drew near it suddenly shied and reared so violently that any but +a practiced horseman would have been unseated. No catastrophe occurred, +however, and a moment afterward the two cavaliers were face to face. No +sooner had their eyes met than, as if by a common impulse, they both +drew rein, and set staring at each other with a curiosity which merged +into astonishment. At length the stranger on the black horse gave a +short laugh, and said: + +"I perceive that the same strange thing has struck us both, sir. If you +won't consider it uncivil, I should like to know who you are. My name +is Giovanni Lambert." + +"Giovanni Lambert," repeated David, with a slight involuntary movement; +"unless I am mistaken, I have heard mention of you. But you are not +Italian?" + +"Only on my mother's side. But you have the advantage of me." + +"You will understand that I could not have heard of you without feeling +a strong desire to meet you," said David, dismounting as he spoke. "It +is, I think, the only desire left me in the world. I had marked this +wood, as I came along, as an inviting place to rest in. Would it suit +you to spend an hour here, where we can converse better at our ease +than in saddle; or does time press you? As for me, I have little more +to do with time." + +"I am at your service, sir, with pleasure," returned the other, leaping +lightly to the ground, and revealing by the movement a pair of small +pistols attached to the belt beneath his blue riding surtout. "It was +in my mind, also, to stretch my legs and take a pull at my pipe, for, +early as it is, I have ridden far this morning." + +At the point where they had halted a green lane branched off into the +depths of the wood, and down this they passed, leading their horses. +When they were out of sight of the road they made their animals fast in +such a way that they could crop the grass, and themselves reclined at +the foot of a broad-limbed oak, and they remained in converse there for +upward of an hour. + +In fact, it must been several hours later (for the sun was high in the +heavens) when one of them issued from the wood. He was mounted on a +black horse, and wore a blue surtout and high boots. After looking up +and down the road, and assuring himself that no one was in sight, he +turned his horse's head toward London, and set off at a round canter. +Coming to a cross-road, he turned to the right, and rode for an hour in +that direction, crossing the Thames near Hampton Wick. In the afternoon +he entered London from the south, and put up at an obscure hostelry. +Having seen his horse attended to, and eaten something himself, he went +to bed and slept soundly for eighteen hours. On awaking, he ate +heartily again, and spent the rest of the day in writing and arranging +a quantity of documents that were packed in his saddle-bags. The next +morning early he paid his reckoning, rode across London Bridge, and +shaped his course toward the west. + +Meanwhile the town of Witton was in vast perturbation. When Mr. Harwood +Courtney woke up late in the afternoon, and came yawning down-stairs to +get his breakfast, he learned, in answer to his inquiries, that nothing +had been seen of David Poindexter since he rode away thirteen hours +ago. Mr. Courtney expressed anxiety at this news, and dispatched his +own valet and one of David's grooms to make investigations in the +neighborhood. These two personages investigated to such good purpose +that before night the whole neighborhood was aware that David +Poindexter had disappeared. By the next morning it became evident that +something had happened to the Wicked Parson, and some people ventured +to opine that the thing which had happened to him was that he had run +away. And indeed it was astonishing to find to how many worthy people +this evil-minded parson was in debt. Every other man you met had a bill +against the Reverend David Poindexter in his pocket; and as the day +wore on, and still no tidings of the missing man were received, +individuals of the sheriff and bailiff species began to be +distinguishable amid the crowd. But the great sensation was yet to +come. How the report started no one knew, but toward supper-time it +passed from mouth to mouth that Mr. Harwood Courtney, in the course of +his twenty-four hours of picquet with Poindexter, had won from the +latter not his ready money alone, but the entire property and estates +that had accrued to him as nearest of kin to the late David Lambert. +And it was added that, as the debt was a gambling transaction, and +therefore not technically recoverable by process of law, Mr. Courtney +was naturally very anxious for his debtor to put in an appearance. Now +it so happened that this report, unlike many others ostensibly more +plausible, was true in every particular. + +Probably there was more gossip at the supper-tables of Witton that +night than in any other town of ten times the size in the United +Kingdom; and it was formally agreed that Poindexter had escaped to the +Continent, and would either remain in hiding there, or take passage by +the first opportunity to the American colonies, or the United States, +as they had now been called for some years past. Nobody defended the +reverend apostate, but, on the other hand, nobody pretended to be sorry +for Mr. Harwood Courtney; it was generally agreed that they had both of +them got what they deserved. The only question was, What was to become +of the property? Some people said it ought to belong to Edith Saltine; +but of course poetical justice of that kind was not to be expected. + +Edith, meanwhile, had kept herself strictly secluded. She was the last +person who had seen David Poindexter, but she had mentioned the fact to +no one. She was also the only person who did not believe that he had +escaped, but who felt convinced that he was dead, and that he had died +by his own hand. That gesture of farewell and of despair which he had +made to her as he vanished behind the cedar of Lebanon had for her a +significance capable of only one interpretation. Were he alive, he +would have returned. + +On the evening of the day following the events just recorded, the +solitude of her room suddenly became terrible to Edith, and she was +irresistibly impelled to dress herself and go forth in the open air. +She wound a veil about her head, and, avoiding the main thoroughfare, +slipped out of the town unperceived, and gained the free country. After +a while she found herself approaching a large tree, which spread its +branches across a narrow lane that made a short-cut to the London +highway. Beneath the tree was a natural seat, formed of a fragment of +stone, and here David and she had often met and sat. It was a mild, +still evening; she sat down on the stone, and removed her veil. The +moon, then in its first quarter, was low in the west, and shone beneath +the branches of the tree. + +Presently she was aware--though not by any sound--that some one was +approaching, and she drew back in the shadow of the tree. Down the lane +came a horseman, mounted on a tall, black horse. The outline of his +figure and the manner in which he rode fixed Edith's gaze as if by a +spell, and made the blood hum in her ears. Nearer he came, and now his +face was discernible in the level moonlight. It was impossible to +mistake that countenance: the horseman was David Poindexter. His +costume, however, was different from any he had ever before worn; there +was nothing clerical about it; nor was that black horse from the +Poindexter stables. Then, too, how noiselessly he rode!--as noiselessly +as a ghost. That, however, must have been because his horse's hoofs +fell on the soft turf. He rode slowly, and his head was bent as if in +thought; but almost before Edith could draw her breath, much less to +speak, he had passed beneath the boughs of the tree, and was riding on +toward the village. Now he had vanished in the vague light and shadow, +and a moment later Edith began to doubt whether her senses had not +played her a trick. A superstitious horror fell upon her; what she had +seen was a spirit, not living flesh and blood. She knelt down by the +stone, and remained for a long time with her face hidden upon her arms, +and her hands clasped, sometimes praying, sometimes wondering and +fearing. At last she rose to her feet, and hastened homeward through +the increasing darkness. But before she had reached her house she had +discovered that what she had seen was no ghost. The whole village was +in a fever of excitement. + +Everybody was full of the story. An hour ago who should appear riding +quietly up the village street but David Poindexter himself--at least, +if it were not he, it was the devil. He seemed to take little notice of +the astonished glances that were thrown at him, or, at any rate, not to +understand them. Instead of going to the Lambert mansion, he had +alighted at the inn, and asked the innkeeper whether he might have +lodging there. But when the innkeeper, who had known the reverend +gentleman as well as he knew his own sign-board, had addressed him by +name, the other had shaken his head, seemed perplexed, and had affirmed +that his name was not Poindexter but Lambert; and had added, upon +further inquiry, that he was the only son of David Lambert, and was +come to claim that gentleman's property, to which he was by law +entitled; in proof whereof he had produced various documents, among +them the certificates of his mother's marriage and of his own birth. As +to David Poindexter, he declared that he knew not there was such a +person; and although no man in his senses could be made to believe that +David Poindexter and this so-called Lambert were twain, and not one and +the same individual, the latter stoutly maintained his story, and vowed +that the truth would sooner or later appear and confirm him. Meanwhile, +however, one of his creditors had had him arrested for a debt of eight +hundred pounds; and Harwood Courtney had seen him, and said that he was +ready to pledge his salvation that the man was Poindexter and nobody +else. So here the matter rested for the present. But who ever heard of +so strange and audacious an attempt at imposition? The man had not even +made any effort to disguise himself further than to put on a different +suit of clothes and get another horse; and why, in the name of all that +was inconceivable, had he come back to Witton, instead of going to any +other part of the earth's surface What could he expect here, except +immediate detection, imprisonment, and ruin? Was he insane? He did not +seem to be so; but that interpretation of his conduct was not only the +most charitable one, but no other could be imagined that would account +for the facts. + +Witton slept but little that night; but who shall describe its +bewilderment when, early in the morning, a constable arrived in the +village with the news that the dead body of the Reverend David +Poindexter had been found in some woods about fifteen miles off, and +that his bay mare had been picked up grazing along the roadside not far +from home! Upon the heels of this intelligence came the corpse itself, +lying in a country wagon, and the bay mare trotting behind. It was +taken out and placed on the table in the inn parlor, where it +immediately became the center of a crowd half crazy with curiosity and +amazement. The cause of death was found to be the breaking of the +vertebral column just at the base of the neck. There was no other +injury on the body, and, allowing for the natural changes incident to +death, the face was in every particular the face of David Poindexter. +The man who called himself Lambert was now brought into the room, and +made to stand beside the corpse, which he regarded with a certain calm +interest. The resemblance between the two was minute and astonishing; +it was found to be impossible, upon that evidence alone, to decide +which was David Poindexter. + +The matter was brought to trial as promptly as possible. A great number +of witnesses identified the prisoner as David Poindexter, but those who +had seen the corpse mostly gave their evidence an opposite inclination; +and four persons (one of them the gray-eyed gentleman who has been +already mentioned) swore positively that the prisoner was Giovanni +Lambert, the gray-eyed gentleman adding that he had once met +Poindexter, and had confidently taken him to be Lambert. + +An attempt was then made to prove that Lambert had murdered Poindexter; +but it entirely failed, there being no evidence that the two men had +ever so much as met, and there being no conceivable motive for the +murder. Lambert, therefore, was permitted to enter undisturbed upon his +inheritance; for he had no difficulty in establishing the fact of the +elder Lambert's marriage to an Italian woman twenty-three years before. +The marriage had been a secret one, and soon after a violent quarrel +had taken place between the wife and husband, and they had separated. +The following month Giovanni was born prematurely. He had seen his +father but once. The quarrel was never made up, but Lambert sent his +wife, from time to time, money enough for her support. She had died +about ten years ago, and had given her son the papers to establish his +identity, telling him that the day would come to use them. Giovanni had +been a soldier, fighting against the French in Spain and elsewhere, and +had only heard of his father's death a few weeks ago. He had thereupon +come to claim his own, with the singular results that we have seen. + +Here was the end of the case, so far as the law was concerned; but the +real end of it is worth noting. Lambert, by his own voluntary act, paid +all the legal debts contracted by Poindexter, and gave Courtney, in +settlement of the gambling transaction, a sum of fifty thousand pounds. +The remainder of his fortune, which was still considerable, he devoted +almost entirely to charitable purposes, doing so much genuine good, in +a manner so hearty and unassuming, that he became the object of more +personal affection than falls to the lot of most philanthropists. He +was of a quiet, sad, and retiring disposition, and uniformly very +sparing of words. After a year or so, circumstances brought it about +that he and Miss Saltine were associated in some benevolent enterprise, +and from that time forward they often consulted together in such +matters, Lambert making her the medium of many of his benefactions. Of +course the gossips were ready to predict that it would end with a +marriage; and indeed it was impossible to see the two together (though +both of them, and especially Edith, had altered somewhat with the +passage of years) without being reminded of the former love affair in +which Lambert's double had been the hero. Did this also occur to Edith? +It could hardly have been otherwise, and it would be interesting to +speculate on her feelings in the matter; but I have only the story to +tell. At all events, they never did marry, though they became very +tender friends. At the end of seven years Colonel Saltine died of +jaundice; he had been failing in his mind for some time previous, and +had always addressed Lambert as Poindexter, and spoken of him as his +son-in-law. The year following Lambert himself died, after a brief +illness. He left all his property to Edith. She survived to her +seventieth year, making it the business of her life to carry out his +philanthropic schemes, and she always dressed in widows' weeds. After +her death, the following passage was found in one of her private +journals. It refers to her last interview with Lambert, on his +death-bed: + +".... He smiled, and said, 'You will believe, now, that I was sincere +in renouncing the ministry, though I have tried to serve the Lord in +other ways than from the pulpit.' I felt a shock in my heart, and could +hardly say, 'What do you mean, Mr. Lambert?' He replied, 'Surely, +Edith, your soul knows, if your reason does not, that I am David +Poindexter!' I could not speak. I hid my face in my hands. After a +while, in separate sentences, he told me the truth. When he rode forth +on that dreadful morning it was with the purpose to die. But he met on +the road this Giovanni Lambert, who so marvelously resembled him, and +they sat down together in the wood and talked, and Giovanni told him +all the story of his life.... As Giovanni was about to mount his horse, +which was very restive, he saw a violet in the grass, and stooped to +pick it. The horse lashed out with its heels, and struck him in the +back of the neck and killed him.... Then the idea came to David to +exchange clothes with the dead man, and to take his papers, and +personate him. Thus, he could escape from the individuality which was +his curse, and find his true self, as it were, in another person. He +said, too, that his greatest hope had been to win my love and make me +his wife; but he found that he could not bring himself to attempt that, +unless he confessed his falsehood to me, and he had feared that this +confession would turn me from him forever. I wept, and told him that my +heart had been his almost from the first, because I always thought of +him as David, and that I would have loved him through all things. He +said, 'Then God has been more merciful to me than I deserve; but, +doubtless, it is also of His mercy that we have remained unmarried.' +But I was in an agony, and could not yet be reconciled. At last he +said, 'Will you kiss me, Edith?' and afterward he said, 'My wife!' and +that was his last word. But we shall meet again!" + + + + +KEN'S MYSTERY. + + +One cool October evening--it was the last day of the month, and +unusually cool for the time of year--I made up my mind to go and spend +an hour or two with my friend Keningale. Keningale was an artist (as +well as a musical amateur and poet), and had a very delightful studio +built onto his house, in which he was wont to sit of an evening. The +studio had a cavernous fire-place, designed in imitation of the +old-fashioned fire-places of Elizabethan manor-houses, and in it, when +the temperature out-doors warranted, he would build up a cheerful fire +of dry logs. It would suit me particularly well, I thought, to go and +have a quiet pipe and chat in front of that fire with my friend. + +I had not had such a chat for a very long time--not, in fact, since +Keningale (or Ken, as his friends called him) had returned from his +visit to Europe the year before. He went abroad, as he affirmed at the +time, "for purposes of study," whereat we all smiled, for Ken, so far +as we knew him, was more likely to do anything else than to study. He +was a young fellow of buoyant temperament, lively and social in his +habits, of a brilliant and versatile mind, and possessing an income of +twelve or fifteen thousand dollars a year; he could sing, play, +scribble, and paint very cleverly, and some of his heads and +figure-pieces were really well done, considering that he never had any +regular training in art; but he was not a worker. Personally he was +fine-looking, of good height and figure, active, healthy, and with a +remarkably fine brow, and clear, full-gazing eye. Nobody was surprised +at his going to Europe, nobody expected him to do anything there except +amuse himself, and few anticipated that he would be soon again seen in +New York. He was one of the sort that find Europe agree with them. Off +he went, therefore; and in the course of a few months the rumor reached +us that he was engaged to a handsome and wealthy New York girl whom he +had met in London. This was nearly all we did hear of him until, not +very long afterward, he turned up again on Fifth Avenue, to every one's +astonishment; made no satisfactory answer to those who wanted to know +how he happened to tire so soon of the Old World; while, as to the +reported engagement, he cut short all allusion to that in so peremptory +a manner as to show that it was not a permissible topic of conversation +with him. It was surmised that the lady had jilted him; but, on the +other hand, she herself returned home not a great while after, and, +though she had plenty of opportunities, she has never married to this +day. + +Be the rights of that matter what they may, it was soon remarked that +Ken was no longer the careless and merry fellow he used to be; on the +contrary, he appeared grave, moody, averse from general society, and +habitually taciturn and undemonstrative even in the company of his most +intimate friends. Evidently something had happened to him, or he had +done something. What? Had he committed a murder? or joined the +Nihilists? or was his unsuccessful love affair at the bottom of it? +Some declared that the cloud was only temporary, and would soon pass +away. Nevertheless, up to the period of which I am writing, it had not +passed away, but had rather gathered additional gloom, and threatened +to become permanent. + +Meanwhile I had met him twice or thrice at the club, at the opera, or +in the street, but had as yet had no opportunity of regularly renewing +my acquaintance with him. We had been on a footing of more than common +intimacy in the old days, and I was not disposed to think that he would +refuse to renew the former relations now. But what I had heard and +myself seen of his changed condition imparted a stimulating tinge of +suspense or curiosity to the pleasure with which I looked forward to +the prospects of this evening. His house stood at a distance of two or +three miles beyond the general range of habitations in New York at this +time, and as I walked briskly along in the clear twilight air I had +leisure to go over in my mind all that I had known of Ken and had +divined of his character. After all, had there not always been +something in his nature--deep down, and held in abeyance by the +activity of his animal spirits--but something strange and separate, and +capable of developing under suitable conditions into--into what? As I +asked myself this question I arrived at his door; and it was with a +feeling of relief that I felt the next moment the cordial grasp of his +hand, and his voice bidding me welcome in a tone that indicated +unaffected gratification at my presence. He drew me at once into the +studio, relieved me of my hat and cane, and then put his hand on my +shoulder. + +"I am glad to see you," he repeated, with singular earnestness--"glad +to see you and to feel you; and to-night of all nights in the year." + +"Why to-night especially?" + +"Oh, never mind. It's just as well, too, you didn't let me know +beforehand you were coming; the unreadiness is all, to paraphrase the +poet. Now, with you to help me, I can drink a glass of whisky and water +and take a bit draw of the pipe. This would have been a grim night for +me if I'd been left to myself." + +"In such a lap of luxury as this, too!" said I, looking round at the +glowing fire-place, the low, luxurious chairs, and all the rich and +sumptuous fittings of the room. "I should have thought a condemned +murderer might make himself comfortable here." + +"Perhaps; but that's not exactly my category at present. But have you +forgotten what night this is? This is November-eve, when, as tradition +asserts, the dead arise and walk about, and fairies, goblins, and +spiritual beings of all kinds have more freedom and power than on any +other day of the year. One can see you've never been in Ireland." + +"I wasn't aware till now that you had been there, either." + +"Yes, I have been in Ireland. Yes--" He paused, sighed, and fell into a +reverie, from which, however, he soon roused himself by an effort, and +went to a cabinet in a corner of the room for the liquor and tobacco. +While he was thus employed I sauntered about the studio, taking note of +the various beauties, grotesquenesses, and curiosities that it +contained. Many things were there to repay study and arouse admiration; +for Ken was a good collector, having excellent taste as well as means +to back it. But, upon the whole, nothing interested me more than some +studies of a female head, roughly done in oils, and, judging from the +sequestered positions in which I found them, not intended by the artist +for exhibition or criticism. There were three or four of these studies, +all of the same face, but in different poses and costumes. In one the +head was enveloped in a dark hood, overshadowing and partly concealing +the features; in another she seemed to be peering duskily through a +latticed casement, lit by a faint moonlight; a third showed her +splendidly attired in evening costume, with jewels in her hair and +cars, and sparkling on her snowy bosom. The expressions were as various +as the poses; now it was demure penetration, now a subtle inviting +glance, now burning passion, and again a look of elfish and elusive +mockery. In whatever phase, the countenance possessed a singular and +poignant fascination, not of beauty merely, though that was very +striking, but of character and quality likewise. + +"Did you find this model abroad?" I inquired at length. "She has +evidently inspired yon, and I don't wonder at it." + +Ken, who had been mixing the punch, and had not noticed my movements, +now looked up, and said: "I didn't mean those to be seen. They don't +satisfy me, and I am going to destroy them; but I couldn't rest till +I'd made some attempts to reproduce--What was it you asked? Abroad? +Yes--or no. They were all painted here within the last six weeks." + +'"Whether they satisfy you or not, they are by far the best things of +yours I have ever seen." + +'"Well, let them alone, and tell me what you think of this beverage. To +my thinking, it goes to the right spot. It owes its existence to your +coming here. I can't drink alone, and those portraits are not company, +though, for aught I know, she might have come out of the canvas +to-night and sat down in that chair." Then, seeing my inquiring look, +he added, with a hasty laugh, "It's November-eve, you know, when +anything may happen, provided its strange enough. Well, here's to +ourselves." + +We each swallowed a deep draught of the smoking and aromatic liquor, +and set down our glasses with approval. The punch was excellent. Ken +now opened a box of cigars, and we seated ourselves before the +fire-place. + +"All we need now," I remarked, after a short silence, "is a little +music. By-the-by, Ken, have you still got the banjo I gave you before +you went abroad?" + +He paused so long before replying that I supposed he had not heard my +question. "I have got it," he said, at length, "but it will never make +any more music." + +"Got broken, eh? Can't it be mended? It was a fine instrument." + +"It's not broken, but it's past mending. You shall see for yourself." + +He arose as he spoke, and going to another part of the studio, opened a +black oak coffer, and took out of it a long object wrapped up in a +piece of faded yellow silk. He handed it to me, and when I had +unwrapped it, there appeared a thing that might once have been a banjo, +but had little resemblance to one now. It bore every sign of extreme +age. The wood of the handle was honeycombed with the gnawings of worms, +and dusty with dry-rot. The parchment head was green with mold, and +hung in shriveled tatters. The hoop, which was of solid silver, was so +blackened and tarnished that it looked like dilapidated iron. The +strings were gone, and most of the tuning-screws had dropped out of +their decayed sockets. Altogether it had the appearance of having been +made before the Flood, and been forgotten in the forecastle of Noah's +Ark ever since. + +"It is a curious relic, certainly," I said. "Where did you come across +it? I had no idea that the banjo was invented so long ago as this. It +certainly can't be less than two hundred years old, and may be much +older than that." + +Ken smiled gloomily. "You are quite right," lie said; "it is at least +two hundred years old, and yet it is the very same banjo that you gave +me a year ago." + +"Hardly," I returned, smiling in my turn, "since that was made to my +order with a view to presenting it to you." + +"I know that; but the two hundred years have passed since then. Yes; it +is absurd and impossible, I know, but nothing is truer. That banjo, +which was made last year, existed in the sixteenth century, and has +been rotting ever since. Stay. Give it to me a moment, and I'll +convince you. You recollect that your name and mine, with the date, +were engraved on the silver hoop?" + +"Yes; and there was a private mark of my own there, also." + +"Very well," said Ken, who had been rubbing a place on the hoop with a +corner of the yellow silk wrapper; "look at that." + +I took the decrepit instrument from him, and examined the spot which he +had rubbed. It was incredible, sure enough; but there were the names +and the date precisely as I had caused them to be engraved; and there, +moreover, was my own private mark, which I had idly made with an old +etching point not more than eighteen months before. After convincing +myself that there was no mistake, I laid the banjo across my knees, and +stared at my friend in bewilderment. He sat smoking with a kind of grim +composure, his eyes fixed upon the blazing logs. + +"I'm mystified, I confess," said I. "Come; what is the joke? What +method have you discovered of producing the decay of centuries on this +unfortunate banjo in a few months? And why did you do it? I have heard +of an elixir to counteract the effects of time, but your recipe seems +to work the other way--to make time rush forward at two hundred times +his usual rate, in one place, while he jogs on at his usual gait +elsewhere. Unfold your mystery, magician. Seriously, Ken, how on earth +did the thing happen?" + +"I know no more about it than you do," was his reply. "Either you and I +and all the rest of the living world are insane, or else there has been +wrought a miracle as strange as any in tradition. How can I explain it? +It is a common saying--a common experience, if you will--that we may, +on certain trying or tremendous occasions, live years in one moment. +But that's a mental experience, not a physical one, and one that +applies, at all events, only to human beings, not to senseless things +of wood and metal. You imagine the thing is some trick or jugglery. If +it be, I don't know the secret of it. There's no chemical appliance +that I ever heard of that will get a piece of solid wood into that +condition in a few months, or a few years. And it wasn't done in a few +years, or a few months either. A year ago today at this very hour that +banjo was as sound as when it left the maker's hands, and twenty-four +hours afterward--I'm telling you the simple truth--it was as you see it +now." + +The gravity and earnestness with which Ken made this astounding +statement were evidently not assumed, He believed every word that he +uttered. I knew not what to think. Of course my friend might be insane, +though he betrayed none of the ordinary symptoms of mania; but, however +that might be, there was the banjo, a witness whose silent testimony +there was no gainsaying. The more I meditated on the matter the more +inconceivable did it appear. Two hundred years--twenty-four hours; +these were the terms of the proposed equation. Ken and the banjo both +affirmed that the equation had been made; all worldly knowledge and +experience affirmed it to be impossible. "What was the explanation? +What is time? What is life? I felt myself beginning to doubt the +reality of all things. And so this was the mystery which my friend had +been brooding over since his return from abroad. No wonder it had +changed him. More to be wondered at was it that it had not changed him +more. + +"Can you tell me the whole story?" I demanded at length. + +Ken quaffed another draught from his glass of whisky and water and +rubbed his hand through his thick brown beard. "I have never spoken to +any one of it heretofore," he said, "and I had never meant to speak of +it. But I'll try and give you some idea of what it was. You know me +better than any one else; you'll understand the thing as far as it can +ever be understood, and perhaps I may be relieved of some of the +oppression it has caused me. For it is rather a ghastly memory to +grapple with alone, I can tell you." + +Hereupon, without further preface, Ken related the following tale. He +was, I may observe in passing, a naturally fine narrator. There were +deep, lingering tones in his voice, and he could strikingly enhance the +comic or pathetic effect of a sentence by dwelling here and there upon +some syllable. His features were equally susceptible of humorous and of +solemn expressions, and his eyes were in form and hue wonderfully +adapted to showing great varieties of emotion. Their mournful aspect +was extremely earnest and affecting; and when Ken was giving utterance +to some mysterious passage of the tale they had a doubtful, melancholy, +exploring look which appealed irresistibly to the imagination. But the +interest of his story was too pressing to allow of noticing these +incidental embellishments at the time, though they doubtless had their +influence upon me all the same. + +"I left New York on an Inman Line steamer, you remember," began Ken, +"and landed at Havre. I went the usual round of sight-seeing on the +Continent, and got round to London in July, at the height of the +season. I had good introductions, and met any number of agreeable and +famous people. Among others was a young lady, a countrywoman of my +own--you know whom I mean--who interested me very much, and before her +family left London she and I were engaged. We parted there for the +time, because she had the Continental trip still to make, while I +wanted to take the opportunity to visit the north of England and +Ireland. I landed at Dublin about the 1st of October, and, zigzagging +about the country, I found myself in County Cork about two weeks later. + +"There is in that region some of the most lovely scenery that human +eyes ever rested on, and it seems to be less known to tourists than +many places of infinitely less picturesque value. A lonely region too: +during my rambles I met not a single stranger like myself, and few +enough natives. It seems incredible that so beautiful a country should +be so deserted. After walking a dozen Irish miles you come across a +group of two or three one-roomed cottages, and, like as not, one or +more of those will have the roof off and the walls in ruins. The few +peasants whom one sees, however, are affable and hospitable, especially +when they hear you are from that terrestrial heaven whither most of +their friends and relatives have gone before them. They seem simple and +primitive enough at first sight, and yet they are as strange and +incomprehensible a race as any in the world. They are as superstitious, +as credulous of marvels, fairies, magicians, and omens, as the men whom +St. Patrick preached to, and at the same time they are shrewd, +skeptical, sensible, and bottomless liars. Upon the whole, I met with +no nation on my travels whose company I enjoyed so much, or who +inspired me with so much kindliness, curiosity, and repugnance. + +"At length I got to a place on the sea-coast, which I will not further +specify than to say that it is not many miles from Ballymacheen, on the +south shore. I have seen Venice and Naples, I have driven along the +Cornice Road, I have spent a month at our own Mount Desert, and I say +that all of them together are not so beautiful as this glowing, +deep-hued, soft-gleaming, silvery-lighted, ancient harbor and town, +with the tall hills crowding round it and the black cliffs and +headlands planting their iron feet in the blue, transparent sea. It is +a very old place, and has had a history which it has outlived ages +since. It may once have had two or three thousand inhabitants; it has +scarce five or six hundred to day. Half the houses are in ruins or have +disappeared; many of the remainder are standing empty. All the people +are poor, most of them abjectly so; they saunter about with bare feet +and uncovered heads, the women in quaint black or dark-blue cloaks, the +men in such anomalous attire as only an Irishman knows how to get +together, the children half naked. The only comfortable-looking people +are the monks and the priests, and the soldiers in the fort. For there +is a fort there, constructed on the huge ruins of one which may have +done duty in the reign of Edward the Black Prince, or earlier, in whose +mossy embrasures are mounted a couple of cannon, which occasionally +sent a practice-shot or two at the cliff on the other side of the +harbor. The garrison consists of a dozen men and three or four officers +and non-commissioned officers. I suppose they are relieved +occasionally, but those I saw seemed to have become component parts of +their surroundings. + +"I put up at a wonderful little old inn, the only one in the place, and +took my meals in a dining-saloon fifteen feet by nine, with a portrait +of George I (a print varnished to preserve it) hanging over the +mantel-piece. On the second evening after dinner a young gentleman came +in--the dining-saloon being public property of course--and ordered some +bread and cheese and a bottle of Dublin stout. We presently fell into +talk; he turned out to be an officer from the fort, Lieutenant +O'Connor, and a fine young specimen of the Irish soldier he was. After +telling me all he knew about the town, the surrounding country, his +friends, and himself, he intimated a readiness to sympathize with +whatever tale I might choose to pour into his ear; and I had pleasure +in trying to rival his own outspokenness. We became excellent friends; +we had up a half-pint of Kinahan's whisky, and the lieutenant expressed +himself in terms of high praise of my countrymen, my country, and my +own particular cigars. When it became time for him to depart I +accompanied him--for there was a splendid moon abroad--and bade him +farewell at the fort entrance, having promised to come over the next +day and make the acquaintance of the other fellows. 'And mind your eye, +now, going back, my dear boy,' he called out, as I turned my face +homeward. 'Faith, 'tis a spooky place, that graveyard, and you'll as +likely meet the black woman there as anywhere else!' + +"The graveyard was a forlorn and barren spot on the hill-side, just the +hither side of the fort: thirty or forty rough head-stones, few of +which retained any semblance of the perpendicular, while many were so +shattered and decayed as to seem nothing more than irregular natural +projections from the ground. Who the black woman might be I knew not, +and did not stay to inquire. I had never been subject to ghostly +apprehensions, and as a matter of fact, though the path I had to follow +was in places very bad going, not to mention a hap-hazard scramble over +a ruined bridge that covered a deep-lying brook, I reached my inn +without any adventure whatever. + +"The next day I kept my appointment at the fort, and found no reason to +regret it; and my friendly sentiments were abundantly reciprocated, +thanks more especially, perhaps, to the success of my banjo, which I +carried with me, and which was as novel as it was popular with those +who listened to it. The chief personages in the social circle besides +my friend the lieutenant were Major Molloy, who was in command, a racy +and juicy old campaigner, with a face like a sunset, and the surgeon, +Dr. Dudeen, a long, dry, humorous genius, with a wealth of anecdotical +and traditional lore at his command that I have never seen surpassed. +We had a jolly time of it, and it was the precursor of many more like +it. The remains of October slipped away rapidly, and I was obliged to +remember that I was a traveler in Europe, and not a resident in +Ireland. The major, the surgeon, and the lieutenant all protested +cordially against my proposed departure, but, as there was no help for +it, they arranged a farewell dinner to take place in the fort on +All-halloween. + +"I wish you could have been at that dinner with me! It was the essence +of Irish good-fellowship. Dr. Dudeen was in great force; the major was +better than the best of Lever's novels; the lieutenant was overflowing +with hearty good-humor, merry chaff, and sentimental rhapsodies anent +this or the other pretty girl of the neighborhood. For my part I made +the banjo ring as it had never rung before, and the others joined in +the chorus with a mellow strength of lungs such as you don't often hear +outside of Ireland. Among the stories that Dr. Dudeen regaled us with +was one about the Kern of Querin and his wife, Ethelind +Fionguala--which being interpreted signifies 'the white-shouldered.' +The lady, it appears, was originally betrothed to one O'Connor (here +the lieutenant smacked his lips), but was stolen away on the wedding +night by a party of vampires, who, it would seem, were at that period a +prominent feature among the troubles of Ireland. But as they were +bearing her along--she being unconscious--to that supper where she was +not to eat but to be eaten, the young Kern of Querin, who happened to +be out duck-shooting, met the party, and emptied his gun at it. The +vampires fled, and the Kern carried the fair lady, still in a state of +insensibility, to his house. 'And by the same token, Mr. Keningale,' +observed the doctor, knocking the ashes out of his pipe, 'ye're after +passing that very house on your way here. The one with the dark archway +underneath it, and the big mullioned window at the corner, ye +recollect, hanging over the street as I might say--' + +"'Go 'long wid the house, Dr. Dudeen, dear,' interrupted the +lieutenant; 'sure can't you see we're all dying to know what happened +to sweet Miss Fionguala, God be good to her, when I was after getting +her safe up-stairs--' + +"'Faith, then, I can tell ye that myself, Mr. O'Connor,' exclaimed the +major, imparting a rotary motion to the remnants of whisky in his +tumbler. ''Tis a question to be solved on general principles, as +Colonel O'Halloran said that time he was asked what he'd do if he'd +been the Book o' Wellington, and the Prussians hadn't come up in the +nick o' time at Waterloo. 'Faith,' says the colonel, 'I'll tell ye--' + +"'Arrah, then, major, why would ye be interruptin' the doctor, and Mr. +Keningale there lettin' his glass stay empty till he hears--The Lord +save us! the bottle's empty!' + +"In the excitement consequent upon this discovery, the thread of the +doctor's story was lost; and before it could be recovered the evening +had advanced so far that I felt obliged to withdraw. It took some time +to make my proposition heard and comprehended; and a still longer time +to put it in execution; so that it was fully midnight before I found +myself standing in the cool pure air outside the fort, with the +farewells of my boon companions ringing in my ears. + +"Considering that it had been rather a wet evening in-doors, I was in a +remarkably good state of preservation, and I therefore ascribed it +rather to the roughness of the road than to the smoothness of the +liquor, when, after advancing a few rods, I stumbled and fell. As I +picked myself up I fancied I had heard a laugh, and supposed that the +lieutenant, who had accompanied me to the gate, was making merry over +my mishap; but on looking round I saw that the gate was closed and no +one was visible. The laugh, moreover, had seemed to be close at hand, +and to be even pitched in a key that was rather feminine than +masculine. Of course I must have been deceived; nobody was near me: my +imagination had played me a trick, or else there was more truth than +poetry in the tradition that Halloween is the carnival-time of +disembodied spirits. It did not occur to me at the time that a stumble +is held by the superstitious Irish to be an evil omen, and had I +remembered it it would only have been to laugh at it. At all events, I +was physically none the worse for my fall, and I resumed my way +immediately. + +"But the path was singularly difficult to find, or rather the path I +was following did not seem to be the right one. I did not recognize it; +I could have sworn (except I knew the contrary) that I had never seen +it before. The moon had risen, though her light was as yet obscured by +clouds, but neither my immediate surroundings nor the general aspect of +the region appeared familiar. Dark, silent hill-sides mounted up on +either hand, and the road, for the most part, plunged downward, as if +to conduct me into the bowels of the earth. The place was alive with +strange echoes, so that at times I seemed to be walking through the +midst of muttering voices and mysterious whispers, and a wild, faint +sound of laughter seemed ever and anon to reverberate among the passes +of the hills. Currents of colder air sighing up through narrow defiles +and dark crevices touched my face as with airy fingers. A certain +feeling of anxiety and insecurity began to take possession of me, +though there was no definable cause for it, unless that I might be +belated in getting home. With the perverse instinct of those who are +lost I hastened my steps, but was impelled now and then to glance back +over my shoulder, with a sensation of being pursued. But no living +creature was in sight. The moon, however, had now risen higher, and the +clouds that were drifting slowly across the sky flung into the naked +valley dusky shadows, which occasionally assumed shapes that looked +like the vague semblance of gigantic human forms. + +"How long I had been hurrying onward I know not, when, with a kind of +suddenness, I found myself approaching a graveyard. It was situated on +the spur of a hill, and there was no fence around it, nor anything to +protect it from the incursions of passers-by. There was something in +the general appearance of this spot that made me half fancy I had seen +it before; and I should have taken it to be the same that I had often +noticed on my way to the fort, but that the latter was only a few +hundred yards distant therefrom, whereas I must have traversed several +miles at least. As I drew near, moreover, I observed that the +head-stones did not appear so ancient and decayed as those of the +other. But what chiefly attracted my attention was the figure that was +leaning or half sitting upon one of the largest of the upright slabs +near the road. It was a female figure draped in black, and a closer +inspection--for I was soon within a few yards of her--showed that she +wore the calla, or long hooded cloak, the most common as well as the +most ancient garment of Irish women, and doubtless of Spanish origin. + +"I was a trifle startled by this apparition, so unexpected as it was, +and so strange did it seem that any human creature should be at that +hour of the night in so desolate and sinister a place. Involuntarily I +paused as I came opposite her, and gazed at her intently. But the +moonlight fell behind her, and the deep hood of her cloak so completely +shadowed her face that I was unable to discern anything but the sparkle +of a pair of eyes, which appeared to be returning my gaze with much +vivacity. + +"'You seem to be at home here,' I said, at length. 'Can you tell me +where I am?' + +"Hereupon the mysterious personage broke into a light laugh, which, +though in itself musical and agreeable, was of a timbre and intonation +that caused my heart to beat rather faster than my late pedestrian +exertions warranted; for it was the identical laugh (or so my +imagination persuaded me) that had echoed in my ears as I arose from my +tumble an hour or two ago. For the rest, it was the laugh of a young +woman, and presumably of a pretty one; and yet it had a wild, airy, +mocking quality, that seemed hardly human at all, or not, at any rate, +characteristic of a being of affections and limitations like unto ours. +But this impression of mine was fostered, no doubt, by the unusual and +uncanny circumstances of the occasion. + +"'Sure, sir,' said she, 'you're at the grave of Ethelind Fionguala.' + +"As she spoke she rose to her feet, and pointed to the inscription on +the stone. I bent forward, and was able, without much difficulty, to +decipher the name, and a date which indicated that the occupant of the +grave must have entered the disembodied state between two and three +centuries ago. + +"'And who are you?' was my next question. + +"'I'm called Elsie,' she replied. 'But where would your honor be going +November-eve?' + +"I mentioned my destination, and asked her whether she could direct me +thither. + +"'Indeed, then, 'tis there I'm going myself,' Elsie replied; 'and if +your honor'll follow me, and play me a tune on the pretty instrument, +'tisn't long we'll be on the road.' + +"She pointed to the banjo which I carried wrapped up under my arm. How +she knew that it was a musical instrument I could not imagine; +possibly, I thought, she may have seen me playing on it as I strolled +about the environs of the town. Be that as it may, I offered no +opposition to the bargain, and further intimated that I would reward +her more substantially on our arrival. At that she laughed again, and +made a peculiar gesture with her hand above her head. I uncovered my +banjo, swept my fingers across the strings, and struck into a fantastic +dance-measure, to the music of which we proceeded along the path, Elsie +slightly in advance, her feet keeping time to the airy measure. In +fact, she trod so lightly, with an elastic, undulating movement, that +with a little more it seemed as if she might float onward like a +spirit. The extreme whiteness of her feet attracted my eye, and I was +surprised to find that instead of being bare, as I had supposed, these +were incased in white satin slippers quaintly embroidered with gold +thread. + +"'Elsie,' said I, lengthening my steps so as to come up with her, +'where do you live, and what do you do for a living?' + +"'Sure, I live by myself,' she answered; 'and if you'd be after knowing +how, you must come and see for yourself.' + +"'Are you in the habit of walking over the hills at night in shoes like +that?' + +"'And why would I not?' she asked, in her turn. 'And where did your +honor get the pretty gold ring on your finger?' + +"The ring, which was of no great intrinsic value, had struck my eye in +an old curiosity-shop in Cork. It was an antique of very old-fashioned +design, and might have belonged (as the vender assured me was the case) +to one of the early kings or queens of Ireland. + +"'Do you like it?' said I. + +"'Will your honor be after making a present of it to Elsie?' she +returned, with an insinuating tone and turn of the head. + +"'Maybe I will, Elsie, on one condition. I am an artist; I make +pictures of people. If you will promise to come to my studio and let me +paint your portrait, I'll give you the ring, and some money besides.' + +"'And will you give me the ring now?' said Elsie. + +"'Yes, if you'll promise.' + +"'And will you play the music to me?' she continued. + +"'As much as you like.' + +"'But maybe I'll not be handsome enough for ye,' said she, with a +glance of her eyes beneath the dark hood. + +"'I'll take the risk of that,' I answered, laughing, 'though, all the +same, I don't mind taking a peep beforehand to remember you by.' So +saying, I put forth a hand to draw back the concealing hood. But Elsie +eluded me, I scarce know how, and laughed a third time, with the same +airy, mocking cadence. + +"'Give me the ring first, and then you shall see me,' she said, +coaxingly. + +"'Stretch out your hand, then,' returned I, removing the ring from my +finger. 'When we are better acquainted, Elsie, you won't be so +suspicious.' + +"She held out a slender, delicate hand, on the forefinger of which I +slipped the ring. As I did so, the folds of her cloak fell a little +apart, affording me a glimpse of a white shoulder and of a dress that +seemed in that deceptive semi-darkness to be wrought of rich and costly +material; and I caught, too, or so I fancied, the frosty sparkle of +precious stones. + +"'Arrah, mind where ye tread!' said Elsie, in a sudden, sharp tone. + +"I looked round, and became aware for the first time that we were +standing near the middle of a ruined bridge which spanned a rapid +stream that flowed at a considerable depth below. The parapet of the +bridge on one side was broken down, and I must have been, in fact, in +imminent danger of stepping over into empty air. I made my way +cautiously across the decaying structure; but, when I turned to assist +Elsie, she was nowhere to be seen. + +"What had become of the girl? I called, but no answer came. I gazed +about on every side, but no trace of her was visible. Unless she had +plunged into the narrow abyss at my feet, there was no place where she +could have concealed herself--none at least that I could discover. She +had vanished, nevertheless; and since her disappearance must have been +premeditated, I finally came to the conclusion that it was useless to +attempt to find her. She would present herself again in her own good +time, or not at all. She had given me the slip very cleverly, and I +must make the best of it. The adventure was perhaps worth the ring. + +"On resuming my way, I was not a little relieved to find that I once +more knew where I was. The bridge that I had just crossed was none +other than the one I mentioned some time back; I was within a mile of +the town, and my way lay clear before me. The moon, moreover, had now +quite dispersed the clouds, and shone down with exquisite brilliance. +Whatever her other failings, Elsie had been a trustworthy guide; she +had brought me out of the depth of elf-land into the material world +again. It had been a singular adventure, certainly; and I mused over it +with a sense of mysterious pleasure as I sauntered along, humming +snatches of airs, and accompanying myself on the strings. Hark! what +light step was that behind me? It sounded like Elsie's; but no, Elsie +was not there. The same impression or hallucination, however, recurred +several times before I reached the outskirts of the town--the tread of +an airy foot behind or beside my own. The fancy did not make me +nervous; on the contrary, I was pleased with the notion of being thus +haunted, and gave myself up to a romantic and genial vein of reverie. + +"After passing one or two roofless and moss-grown cottages, I entered +the narrow and rambling street which leads through the town. This +street a short distance down widens a little, as if to afford the +wayfarer space to observe a remarkable old house that stands on the +northern side. The house was built of stone, and in a noble style of +architecture; it reminded me somewhat of certain palaces of the old +Italian nobility that I had seen on the Continent, and it may very +probably have been built by one of the Italian or Spanish immigrants of +the sixteenth or seventeenth century. The molding of the projecting +windows and arched doorway was richly carved, and upon the front of the +building was an escutcheon wrought in high relief, though I could not +make out the purport of the device. The moonlight falling upon this +picturesque pile enhanced all its beauties, and at the same time made +it seem like a vision that might dissolve away when the light ceased to +shine. I must often have seen the house before, and yet I retained no +definite recollection of it; I had never until now examined it with my +eyes open, so to speak. Leaning against the wall on the opposite side +of the street, I contemplated it for a long while at my leisure. The +window at the corner was really a very fine and massive affair. It +projected over the pavement below, throwing a heavy shadow aslant; the +frames of the diamond-paned lattices were heavily mullioned. How often +in past ages had that lattice been pushed open by some fair hand, +revealing to a lover waiting beneath in the moonlight the charming +countenance of his high-born mistress! Those were brave days. They had +passed away long since. The great house had stood empty for who could +tell how many years; only bats and vermin were its inhabitants. Where +now were those who had built it? and who were they? Probably the very +name of them was forgotten. + +"As I continued to stare upward, however, a conjecture presented itself +to my mind which rapidly ripened into a conviction. Was not this the +house that Dr. Dudeen had described that very evening as having been +formerly the abode of the Kern of Querin and his mysterious bride? +There was the projecting window, the arched doorway. Yes, beyond a +doubt this was the very house. I emitted a low exclamation of renewed +interest and pleasure, and my speculations took a still more +imaginative, but also a more definite turn. + +"What had been the fate of that lovely lady after the Kern had brought +her home insensible in his arms? Did she recover, and were they married +and made happy ever after; or had the sequel been a tragic one? I +remembered to have read that the victims of vampires generally became +vampires themselves. Then my thoughts went back to that grave on the +hill-side. Surely that was unconsecrated ground. Why had they buried +her there? Ethelind of the white shoulder! Ah! why had not I lived in +those days; or why might not some magic cause them to live again for +me? Then would I seek this street at midnight, and standing here +beneath her window, I would lightly touch the strings of my bandore +until the casement opened cautiously and she looked down. A sweet +vision indeed! And what prevented my realizing it? Only a matter of a +couple of centuries or so. And was time, then, at which poets and +philosophers sneer, so rigid and real a matter that a little faith and +imagination might not overcome it? At all events, I had my banjo, the +bandore's legitimate and lineal descendant, and the memory of Fionguala +should have the love-ditty. + +"Hereupon, having retuned the instrument, I launched forth into an old +Spanish love-song, which I had met with in some moldy library during my +travels, and had set to music of my own. I sang low, for the deserted +street re-echoed the lightest sound, and what I sang must reach only my +lady's ears. The words were warm with the fire of the ancient Spanish +chivalry, and I threw into their expression all the passion of the +lovers of romance. Surely Fionguala, the white-shouldered, would hear, +and awaken from her sleep of centuries, and come to the latticed +casement and look down! Hist! see yonder! What light--what shadow is +that that seems to flit from room to room within the abandoned house, +and now approaches the mullioned window? Are my eyes dazzled by the +play of the moonlight, or does the casement move--does it open? Nay, +this is no delusion; there is no error of the senses here. There is +simply a woman, young, beautiful, and richly attired, bending forward +from the window, and silently beckoning me to approach. + +"Too much amazed to be conscious of amazement, I advanced until I stood +directly beneath the casement, and the lady's face, as she stooped +toward me, was not more than twice a man's height from my own. She +smiled and kissed her finger-tips; something white fluttered in her +hand, then fell through the air to the ground at my feet. The next +moment she had withdrawn, and I heard the lattice close. I picked up +what she had let fall; it was a delicate lace handkerchief, tied to the +handle of an elaborately wrought bronze key. It was evidently the key +of the house, and invited me to enter. I loosened it from the +handkerchief, which bore a faint, delicious perfume, like the aroma of +flowers in an ancient garden, and turned to the arched doorway. I felt +no misgiving, and scarcely any sense of strangeness. All was as I had +wished it to be, and as it should be; the mediaeval age was alive once +more, and as for myself, I almost felt the velvet cloak hanging from my +shoulder and the long rapier dangling at my belt. Standing in front of +the door I thrust the key into the lock, turned it, and felt the bolt +yield. The next instant the door was opened, apparently from within; I +stepped across the threshold, the door closed again, and I was alone in +the house, and in darkness. + +"Not alone, however! As I extended my hand to grope my way it was met +by another hand, soft, slender, and cold, which insinuated itself +gently into mine and drew me forward. Forward I went, nothing loath; +the darkness was impenetrable, but I could hear the light rustle of a +dress close to me, and the same delicious perfume that had emanated +from the handkerchief enriched the air that I breathed, while the +little hand that clasped and was clasped by my own alternately +tightened and half relaxed the hold of its soft cold fingers. In this +manner, and treading lightly, we traversed what I presumed to be a +long, irregular passageway, and ascended a staircase. Then another +corridor, until finally we paused, a door opened, emitting a flood of +soft light, into which we entered, still hand in hand. The darkness and +the doubt were at an end. + +"The room was of imposing dimensions, and was furnished and decorated +in a style of antique splendor. The walls were draped with mellow hues +of tapestry; clusters of candles burned in polished silver sconces, and +were reflected and multiplied in tall mirrors placed in the four +corners of the room. The heavy beams of the dark oaken ceiling crossed +each other in squares, and were laboriously carved; the curtains and +the drapery of the chairs were of heavy-figured damask. At one end of +the room was a broad ottoman, and in front of it a table, on which was +set forth, in massive silver dishes, a sumptuous repast, with wines in +crystal beakers. At the side was a vast and deep fire-place, with space +enough on the broad hearth to burn whole trunks of trees. No fire, +however, was there, but only a great heap of dead embers; and the room, +for all its magnificence, was cold--cold as a tomb, or as my lady's +hand--and it sent a subtle chill creeping to my heart. + +"But my lady! how fair she was! I gave but a passing glance at the +room; my eyes and my thoughts were all for her. She was dressed in +white, like a bride; diamonds sparkled in her dark hair and on her +snowy bosom; her lovely face and slender lips were pale, and all the +paler for the dusky glow of her eyes. She gazed at me with a strange, +elusive smile; and yet there was, in her aspect and bearing, something +familiar in the midst of strangeness, like the burden of a song heard +long ago and recalled among other conditions and surroundings. It +seemed to me that something in me recognized her and knew her, had +known her always. She was the woman of whom I had dreamed, whom I had +beheld in visions, whose voice and face had haunted me from boyhood up. +Whether we had ever met before, as human beings meet, I knew not; +perhaps I had been blindly seeking her all over the world, and she had +been awaiting me in this splendid room, sitting by those dead embers +until all the warmth had gone out of her blood, only to be restored by +the heat with which my love might supply her. + +"'I thought you had forgotten me,' she said, nodding as if in answer to +my thought. 'The night was so late--our one night of the year! How my +heart rejoiced when I heard your dear voice singing the song I know so +well! Kiss me--my lips are cold!' + +"Cold indeed they were--cold as the lips of death. But the warmth of my +own seemed to revive them. They were now tinged with a faint color, and +in her cheeks also appeared a delicate shade of pink. She drew fuller +breath, as one who recovers from a long lethargy. Was it my life that +was feeding her? I was ready to give her all. She drew me to the table +and pointed to the viands and the wine. + +"'Eat and drink,' she said. 'You have traveled far, and you need food.' + +"'Will you eat and drink with me?' said I, pouring out the wine. + +"'You are the only nourishment I want,' was her answer.' This wine is +thin and cold. Give me wine as red as your blood and as warm, and I +will drain a goblet to the dregs.' + +"At these words, I know not why, a slight shiver passed through me. She +seemed to gain vitality and strength at every instant, but the chill of +the great room struck into me more and more. + +"She broke into a fantastic flow of spirits, clapping her hands, and +dancing about me like a child. Who was she? And was I myself, or was +she mocking mo when she implied that we had belonged to each other of +old? At length she stood still before me, crossing her hands over her +breast. I saw upon the forefinger of her right hand the gleam of an +antique ring. + +"'Where did you get that ring?' I demanded. + +"She shook her head and laughed. 'Have you been faithful?' she asked. +'It is my ring; it is the ring that unites us; it is the ring you gave +me when you loved me first. It is the ring of the Kern--the fairy ring, +and I am your Ethelind--Ethelind Fionguala.' + +"'So be it,' I said, casting aside all doubt and fear, and yielding +myself wholly to the spell of her inscrutable eyes and wooing lips. +'You are mine, and I am yours, and let us be happy while the hours +last.' + +"'You are mine, and I am yours,' she repeated, nodding her head with an +elfish smile. 'Come and sit beside me, and sing that sweet song again +that you sang to me so long ago. Ah, now I shall live a hundred years.' + +"We seated ourselves on the ottoman, and while she nestled luxuriously +among the cushions, I took my banjo and sang to her. The song and the +music resounded through the lofty room, and came back in throbbing +echoes. And before me as I sang I saw the face and form of Ethelind +Fionguala, in her jeweled bridal dress, gazing at me with burning eyes. +She was pale no longer, but ruddy and warm, and life was like a flame +within her. It was I who had become cold and bloodless, yet with the +last life that was in me I would have sung to her of love that can +never die. But at length my eyes grew dim, the room seemed to darken, +the form of Ethelind alternately brightened and waxed indistinct, like +the last flickerings of a fire; I swayed toward her, and felt myself +lapsing into unconsciousness, with my head resting on her white +shoulder." + +Here Keningale paused a few moments in his story, flung a fresh log +upon the fire, and then continued: + +"I awoke, I know not how long afterward. I was in a vast, empty room in +a ruined building. Rotten shreds of drapery depended from the walls, +and heavy festoons of spiders' webs gray with dust covered the windows, +which were destitute of glass or sash; they had been boarded up with +rough planks which had themselves become rotten with age, and admitted +through their holes and crevices pallid rays of light and chilly +draughts of air. A bat, disturbed by these rays or by my own movement, +detached himself from his hold on a remnant of moldy tapestry near me, +and after circling dizzily around my head, wheeled the flickering +noiselessness of his flight into a darker corner. As I arose unsteadily +from the heap of miscellaneous rubbish on which I had been lying, +something which had been resting across my knees fell to the floor with +a rattle. I picked it up, and found it to be my banjo--as you see it +now. + +"Well, that is all I have to tell. My health was seriously impaired; +all the blood seemed to have been drawn out of my veins; I was pale and +haggard, and the chill--Ah, that chill," murmured Keningale, drawing +nearer to the fire, and spreading out his hands to catch the warmth--"I +shall never get over it; I shall carry it to my grave." + + + + +"WHEN HALF-GODS GO, THE GODS ARRIVE." + + +"What a beautiful girl!" said Mr. Ambrose Drayton to himself; "and how +much she looks like--" He cut the comparison short, and turned his eyes +seaward, pulling at his mustache meditatively the while. + +"This American atmosphere, fresh and pure as it is in the nostrils, is +heavy-laden with reminiscences," his thoughts ran on. "Reminiscences, +but always with differences, the chief difference being, no doubt, in +myself. And no wonder. Nineteen years; yes, it's positively nineteen +years since I stood here and gazed out through yonder gap between the +headlands. Nineteen years of foreign lands, foreign men and manners, +the courts, the camps, the schools; adventure, business, and +pleasure--if I may lightly use so mysterious a word. Nineteen and +twenty are thirty-nine; in my case say sixty at least. Why, a girl like +that lovely young thing walking away there with her light step and her +innocent heart would take me to be sixty to a dead certainty. A rather +well-preserved man of sixty--that's how she'd describe me to the young +fellow she's given her heart to. Well, sixty or forty, what difference? +When a man has passed the age at which he falls in love, he is the peer +of Methuselah from that time forth. But what a fiery season that of +love is while it lasts! Ay, and it burns something out of the soul that +never grows again. And well that it should do so: a susceptible heart +is a troublesome burden to lug round the world. Curious that I should +be even thinking of such things: association, I suppose. Here it was +that we met and here we parted. But what a different place it was then! +A lovely cape, half bleak moorland and half shaggy wood, a few rocky +headlands and a great many coots and gulls, and one solitary old +farmhouse standing just where that spick-and-span summer hotel, with +its balconies and cupolas, stands now. So it was nineteen years ago, +and so it may be again, perhaps, nine hundred years hence; but +meanwhile, what a pretty array of modern aesthetic cottages, and plank +walks, and bridges, and bathing-houses, and pleasure-boats! And what an +admirable concourse of well-dressed and pleasurably inclined men and +women! After all, my countrymen are the finest-looking and most +prosperous-appearing people on the globe. They have traveled a little +faster than I have, and on a somewhat different track; but I would +rather be among them than anywhere else. Yes, I won't go back to +London, nor yet to Paris, or Calcutta, or Cairo. I'll buy a cottage +here at Squittig Point, and live and die here and in New York. I wonder +whether Mary is alive and mother of a dozen children, or--not!" + +"Auntie," said Miss Leithe to her relative, as they regained the +veranda of their cottage after their morning stroll on the beach, "who +was that gentleman who looked at us?" + +"Hey?--who?" inquired the widow of the late Mr. Corwin, absently. + +"The one in the thin gray suit and Panama hat; you must have seen him. +A very distinguished-looking man and yet very simple and pleasant; like +some of those nice middle-aged men that you see in 'Punch,' slenderly +built, with handsome chin and eyes, and thick mustache and whiskers. +Oh, auntie, why do you never notice things? I think a man between forty +and fifty is ever so much nicer than when they're younger. They know +how to be courteous, and they're not afraid of being natural. I mean +this one looks as if he would. But he must be somebody remarkable in +some way--don't you think so? There's something about him--something +graceful and gentle and refined and manly--that makes most other men +seem common beside him. Who do you suppose he can be?" + +"Who?--what have you been saying, my dear?" inquired Aunt Corwin, +rousing herself from the perusal of a letter. "Here's Sarah writes that +Frank Redmond was to sail from Havre the 20th; so he won't be here for +a week or ten days yet." + +"Well, he might not have come at all," said the girl, coloring +slightly. "I'm sure I didn't think he would, when he went away." + +"You are both of you a year older and wiser," said the widow, +meditatively; "and you have learned, I hope, not to irritate a man +needlessly. I never irritated Corwin in all my life. They don't +understand it." + +"Here comes Mr. Haymaker," observed Miss Leithe. "I shall ask him." + +"Don't ask him in," said Mrs. Corwin, retiring; "he chatters like an +organ-grinder." + +"Oh, good-morning, Miss Mary!" exclaimed Mr. Haymaker, as he mounted +the steps of the veranda, with his hands extended and his customary +effusion. "How charming you are looking after your bath and your walk +and all! Did you ever see such a charming morning? I never was at a +place I liked so much as Squittig Point; the new Newport, I call +it--eh? the new Newport. So fashionable already, and only been going, +as one might say, three or four years! Such charming people here! Oh, +by-the-way, whom do you think I ran across just now? You wouldn't know +him, though--been abroad since before you were born, I should think. +Most charming man I ever met, and awfully wealthy. Ran across him in +Europe--Paris, I think it was--stop! or was it Vienna? Well, never +mind. Drayton, that's his name; ever hear of him? Ambrose Drayton. Made +a great fortune in the tea-trade; or was it in the mines? I've +forgotten. Well, no matter. Great traveler, too--Africa and the Corea, +and all that sort of thing; and fought under Garibaldi, they say; and +he had the charge of some diplomatic affair at Pekin once. The +quietest, most gentlemanly fellow you ever saw. Oh, you must meet him. +He's come back to stay, and will probably spend the summer here. I'll +get him and introduce him. Oh, he'll be charmed--we all shall." + +"What sort of a looking person is he?" Miss Leithe inquired. + +"Oh, charming--just right! Trifle above medium height; rather lighter +weight than I am, but graceful; grayish hair, heavy mustache, blue +eyes; style of a retired English colonel, rather. You know what I +mean--trifle reticent, but charming manners. Stop! there he goes +now--see him? Just stopping to light a cigar--in a line with the +light-house. Now he's thrown away the match, and walking on again. +That's Ambrose Drayton. Introduce him on the sands this afternoon. How +is your good aunt to-day? So sorry not to have seen her! Well, I must +be off; awfully busy to-day. Good-by, my dear Miss Mary; see you this +afternoon. Good-by. Oh, make my compliments to your good aunt, won't +you? Thanks. So charmed! _Au revoir_." + +"Has that fool gone?" demanded a voice from within. + +"Yes, Auntie," the young lady answered. + +"Then come in to your dinner," the voice rejoined, accompanied by the +sound of a chair being drawn up to a table and sat down upon. Mary +Leithe, after casting a glance after the retreating figure of Mr. +Haymaker and another toward the light-house, passed slowly through the +wire-net doors and disappeared. + +Mr. Drayton had perforce engaged his accommodations at the hotel, all +the cottages being either private property or rented, and was likewise +constrained, therefore, to eat his dinner in public. But Mr. Drayton +was not a hater of his species, nor a fearer of it; and though he had +not acquired precisely our American habits and customs, he was disposed +to be as little strange to them as possible. Accordingly, when the gong +sounded, he entered the large dining-room with great intrepidity. The +arrangement of tables was not continuous, but many small tables, +capable of accommodating from two to six, were dotted about everywhere. +Mr. Drayton established himself at the smallest of them, situated in a +part of the room whence he had a view not only of the room itself, but +of the blue sea and yellow rocks on the other side. This preliminary +feat of generalship accomplished, he took a folded dollar bill from his +pocket and silently held it up in the air, the result being the speedy +capture of a waiter and the introduction of dinner. + +But at this juncture Mr. Haymaker came pitching into the room, as his +nature was, and pinned himself to a standstill, as it were, with his +eyeglass, in the central aisle of tables. Drayton at once gave himself +up for lost, and therefore received Mr. Haymaker with kindness and +serenity when, a minute or two later, he came plunging up, in his usual +ecstasy of sputtering amiability, and seated himself in the chair at +the other side of the table with an air as if everything were charming +in the most charming of all possible worlds, and he himself the most +charming person in it. + +"My dear Drayton, though," exclaimed Mr. Haymaker, in the interval +between the soup and the bluefish, "there is some one here you must +know--most charming girl you ever knew in your life, and has set her +heart on knowing you. We were talking about you this morning--Miss Mary +Leithe. Lovely name, too; pity ever to change it--he! he! he! Why, you +must have seen her about here; has an old aunt, widow of Jim Corwin, +who's dead and gone these five years. You recognize her, of course?" + +"Not as you describe her," said Mr. Drayton, helping his friend to fish. + +"Oh, the handsomest girl about here; tallish, wavy brown hair, soft +brown eyes, the loveliest-shaped eyes in the world, my dear fellow; +complexion like a Titian, figure slender yet, but promising. A way of +giving you her hand that makes you wish she would take your heart," +pursued Mr. Haymaker, impetuously filling his mouth with bluefish, +during the disposal of which he lost the thread of his harangue. +Drayton, however, seemed disposed to recover it for him. + +"Is this young lady from New England?" he inquired. + +"New-Yorker by birth," responded the ever-vivacious Haymaker; "father a +Southern man; mother a Bostonian. Father died eight or nine years after +marriage; mother survived him six years; girl left in care of old Mrs. +Corwin--good old creature, but vague--very vague. Don't fancy the +marriage was a very fortunate one; a little friction, more or less. +Leithe was rather a wild, unreliable sort of man; Mrs. Leithe a woman +not easily influenced--immensely charming, though, and all that, but a +trifle narrow and set. Well, you know, it was this way: Leithe was an +immensely wealthy man when she married him; lost his money, struggled +along, good deal of friction; Mrs. Leithe probably felt she had made a +mistake, and that sort of thing. But Miss Mary here, very different +style, looks like her mother, but softer; more in her, too. Very little +money, poor girl, but charming. Oh! you must know her." + +"What did you say her mother's maiden name was?" + +"Maiden name? Let me see. Why--oh, no--oh, yes--Cleveland, Mary +Cleveland." + +"Mary Cleveland, of Boston; married Hamilton Leithe, about nineteen +years ago. I used to know the lady. And this is her daughter! And Mary +Cleveland is dead!--Help yourself, Haymaker. I never take more than one +course at this hour of the day." + +"But you must let me introduce you, you know," mumbled Haymaker, +through his succotash. + +"I hardly know," said Drayton, rubbing his mustache. "Pardon me if I +leave you," he added, looking at his watch. "It is later than I +thought." + +Nothing more was seen of Drayton for the rest of that day. But the next +morning, as Mary Leithe sat on the Bowlder Rock, with a book on her +lap, and her eyes on the bathers, and her thoughts elsewhere, she heard +a light, leisurely tread behind her, and a gentlemanly, effective +figure made its appearance, carrying a malacca walking-stick, and a +small telescope in a leather case slung over the shoulder. + +"Good-morning, Miss Leithe," said this personage, in a quiet and +pleasant voice. "I knew your mother before you were born, and I can not +feel like a stranger toward her daughter. My name is Ambrose Drayton. +You look something like your mother, I think." + +"I think I remember mamma's having spoken of you," said Mary Leithe, +looking up a little shyly, but with a smile that was the most winning +of her many winning manifestations. Her upper lip, short, but somewhat +fuller than the lower one, was always alive with delicate movements; +the corners of her mouth were blunt, the teeth small; and the smile was +such as Psyche's might have been when Cupid waked her with a kiss. + +"It was here I first met your mother," continued Drayton, taking his +place beside her. "We often sat together on this very rock. I was a +young fellow then, scarcely older than you, and very full of romance +and enthusiasm. Your mother--". He paused a moment, looking at his +companion with a grave smile in his eyes. "If I had been as dear to her +as she was to me," he went on, "you would have been our daughter." + +Mary looked out upon the bathers, and upon the azure bay, and into her +own virgin heart. "Are you married, too?" she asked at length. + +"I was cut out for an old bachelor, and I have been true to my +destiny," was his reply. "Besides, I've lived abroad till a month or +two ago, and good Americans don't marry foreign wives." + +"I should like to go abroad," said Mary Leithe. + +"It is the privilege of Americans," said Drayton. "Other people are +born abroad, and never know the delight of real travel. But, after all, +America is best. The life of the world culminates here. We are the prow +of the vessel; there may be more comfort amidships, but we are the +first to touch the unknown seas. And the foremost men of all nations +are foremost only in so far as they are at heart American; that is to +say, America is, at present, even more an idea and a principle than it +is a country. The nation has perhaps not yet risen to the height of its +opportunities. So you have never crossed the Atlantic?" + +"No; my father never wanted to go; and after he died, mamma could not." + +"Well, our American Emerson says, you know, that, as the good of travel +respects only the mind, we need not depend for it on railways and +steamboats." + +"It seems to me, if we never moved ourselves, our minds would never +really move either." + +"Where would you most care to go?" + +"To Rome, and Jerusalem, and Egypt, and London." + +"Why?" + +"They seem like parts of my mind that I shall never know unless I visit +them." + +"Is there no part of the world that answers to your heart?" + +"Oh, the beautiful parts everywhere, I suppose." + +"I can well believe it," said Drayton, but with so much simplicity and +straightforwardness that Mary Leithe's cheeks scarcely changed color. +"And there is beauty enough here," he added, after a pause. + +"Yes; I have always liked this place," said she, "though the cottages +seem a pity." + +"You knew the old farm-house, then?" + +"Oh, yes; I used to play in the farm-yard when I was a little girl. +After my father died, Mamma used to come here every year. And my aunt +has a cottage here now. You haven't met my aunt, Mr. Drayton?" + +"I wished to know you first. But now I want to know her, and to become +one of the family. There is no one left, I find, who belongs to me. +What would you think of me for a bachelor uncle?" + +"I would like it very much," said Mary, with a smile. + +"Then let us begin," returned Drayton. + +Several days passed away very pleasantly. Never was there a bachelor +uncle so charming, as Haymaker would have said, as Drayton. The kind of +life in the midst of which he found himself was altogether novel and +delightful to him. In some aspects it was like enjoying for the first +time a part of his existence which he should have enjoyed in youth, but +had missed; and in many ways he doubtless enjoyed it more now than he +would have done then, for he brought it to a maturity of experience +which had taught him the inestimable value of simple things; a quiet +nobility of character and clearness of knowledge that enabled him to +perceive and follow the right course in small things as in great; a +serene yet cordial temperament that rendered him the cheerfulest and +most trustworthy of companions; a generous and masculine disposition, +as able to direct as to comply; and years which could sympathize +impartially with youth and age, and supply something which each lacked. +He, meanwhile, sometimes seemed to himself to be walking in a dream. +The region in which he was living, changed, yet so familiar, the +thought of being once more, after so many years of homeless wandering, +in his own land and among his own countrymen, and the companionship of +Mary Leithe, like, yet so unlike, the Mary Cleveland he had known and +loved, possessing in reality all the tenderness and lovely virginal +sweetness that he had imagined in the other, with a warmth of heart +that rejuvenated his own, and a depth and freshness of mind answering +to the wisdom that he had drawn from experience, and rendering her, +though in her different and feminine sphere, his equal--all these +things made Drayton feel as if he would either awake and find them the +phantasmagoria of a beautiful dream, or as if the past time were the +dream, and this the reality. Certainly, in this ardent, penetrating +light of the present, the past looked vaporous and dim, like a range of +mountains scaled long ago and vanishing on the horizon. + +And was this all? Doubtless it was, at first. It was natural that +Drayton should regard with peculiar tenderness the daughter of the +woman he had loved. She was an orphan, and poor; he was alone in the +world, with no one dependent upon him, and with wealth which could find +no better use than to afford this girl the opportunities and the +enjoyments which she else must lack. His anticipations in returning to +America had been somewhat cold and vague. It was his native land; but +abstract patriotism is, after all, rather chilly diet for a human being +to feed his heart upon. The unexpected apparition of Mary Leithe had +provided just that vividness and particularity that were wanting. +Insensibly Drayton bestowed upon her all the essence of the love of +country which he had cherished untainted throughout his long exile. It +was so much easier and simpler a thing to know and appreciate her than +to do as much for the United States and their fifty million +inhabitants, national, political, and social, that it is no wonder if +Drayton, as a modest and sane gentleman, preferred to make the former +the symbol of the latter--of all, at least, that was good and lovable +therein. At the same time, so clear-headed a man could scarcely have +failed to be aware that his affection for Mary Leithe was not actually +dependent upon the fact of her being an emblem. Upon what, then, was it +dependent? Upon her being the daughter of Mary Cleveland? It was true +that he had loved Mary Cleveland; but she had deliberately jilted him +to marry a wealthier man, and was therefore connected with and +responsible for the most painful as well as the most pleasurable +episode of his early life. Mary Leithe bore some personal resemblance +to her mother; but had she been as like her in character and +disposition as she was in figure and feature, would Drayton, knowing +what he knew, have felt drawn toward her? A man does not remain for +twenty years under the influence of an unreasonable and mistaken +passion. Drayton certainly had not, although his disappointment had +kept him a bachelor all his life, and altered the whole course of his +existence. But when we have once embarked upon a certain career, we +continue in it long after the motive which started us has been +forgotten. No; Drayton's regard for Mary Leithe must stand on its own +basis, independent of all other considerations. + +What, in the next place, was the nature of this regard? Was it merely +avuncular, or something different? Drayton assured himself that it was +the former. He was a man of the world, and had done with passions. The +idea of his falling in love made him smile in a deprecatory manner. +That the object of such love should be a girl eighteen years his junior +rendered the suggestion yet more irrational. She was lustrous with +lovable qualities, which he genially recognized and appreciated; nay, +he might love her, but the love would be a quasi-paternal one, not the +love that demands absolute possession and brooks no rivalry. His +attitude was contemplative and beneficent, not selfish and exclusive. +His greatest pleasure would be to see her married to some one worthy of +her. Meantime he might devote himself to her freely and without fear. + +And yet, once again, was he not the dupe of himself and of a +convention? Was his the mood in which an uncle studies his niece, or +even a father his daughter? How often during the day was she absent +from his thoughts, or from his dreams at night? What else gave him so +much happiness as to please her, and what would he not do to give her +pleasure? Why was he dissatisfied and aimless when not in her presence? +Why so full-orbed and complete when she was near? He was eighteen years +the elder, but there was in her a fullness of nature, a balanced +development, which went far toward annulling the discrepancy. Moreover, +though she was young, he was not old, and surely he had the knowledge, +the resources, and the will to make her life happy. There would be, he +fancied, a certain poetical justice in such an issue. It would +illustrate the slow, seemingly severe, but really tender wisdom of +Providence. Out of the very ashes of his dead hopes would arise this +gracious flower of promise. She would afford him scope for the +employment of all those riches, moral and material, which life had +brought him; she would be his reward for having lived honorably and +purely for purity's and honor's sake. But why multiply reasons? There +was justification enough; and true love knows nothing of justification. +He loved her, then; and now, did she love him? This was the real +problem--the mystery of a maiden's heart, which all Solomon's wisdom +and Bacon's logic fail to elucidate. Drayton did what he could. Once he +came to her with the news that he must be absent from an excursion +which they had planned, and he saw genuine disappointment darken her +sweet face, and her slender figure seem to droop. This was well as far +as it went, but beyond that it proved nothing. Another time he gave her +a curious little shell which he had picked up while they were rambling +together along the beach, and some time afterward he accidently noticed +that she was wearing it by a ribbon round her neck. This seemed better. +Again, on a night when there was a social gathering at the hotel, he +entered the room and sat apart at one of the windows, and as long as he +remained there he felt that her gaze was upon him, and twice or thrice +when he raised his eyes they were met by hers, and she smiled; and +afterward, when he was speaking near her, he noticed that she +disregarded what her companion of the moment was saying to her, and +listened only to him. Was not all this encouragement? Nevertheless, +whenever, presuming upon this, he hazarded less ambiguous +demonstrations, she seemed to shrink back and appear strange and +troubled. This behavior perplexed him; he doubted the evidence that had +given him hope; feared that he was a fool; that she divined his love, +and pitied him, and would have him, if at all, only out of pity. +Thereupon he took himself sternly to task, and resolved to give her up. + +It was a transparent July afternoon, with white and gray clouds +drifting across a clear blue sky, and a southwesterly breeze roughening +the dark waves and showing their white shoulders. Mary Leithe and +Drayton came slowly along the rocks, he assisting her to climb or +descend the more rugged places, and occasionally pausing with her to +watch the white canvas of a yacht shiver in the breeze as she went +about, or to question whether yonder flash amid the waves, where the +gulls were hovering and dipping, were a bluefish breaking water. At +length they reached a little nook in the seaward face, which, by often +resorting to it, they had in a manner made their own. It was a small +shelf in the rock, spacious enough for two to sit in at ease, with a +back to lean against, and at one side a bit of level ledge which served +as a stand or table. Before them was the sea, which, at high-water +mark, rose to within three yards of their feet; while from the +shoreward side they were concealed by the ascending wall of sandstone. +Drayton had brought a cushion with him, which he arranged in Mary's +seat; and when they had established themselves, he took a volume of +Emerson's poems from his pocket and laid it on the rock beside him. + +"Are you comfortable?" he asked. + +"Yes; I wish it would be always like this--the weather, and the sun, +and the time--so that we might stay here forever." + +"Forever is the least useful word in human language," observed Drayton. +"In the perspective of time, a few hours, or days, or years, seem alike +inconsiderable." + +"But it is not the same to our hearts, which live forever," she +returned. + +"The life of the heart is love," said Drayton. + +"And that lasts forever," said Mary Leithe. + +"True love lasts, but the object changes," was his reply. + +"It seems to change sometimes," said she. + +"But I think it is only our perception that is misled. We think we have +found what we love; but afterward, perhaps, we find it was not in the +person we supposed, but in some other. Then we love it in him; not +because our heart has changed, but just because it has not." + +"Has that been your experience?" Drayton asked, with a smile. + +"Oh, I was speaking generally," she said, looking down. + +"It may be the truth; but if so, it is a perilous thing to be loved." + +"Perilous?" + +"Why, yes. How can the lover be sure that he really is what his +mistress takes him for? After all, a man has and is nothing in himself. +His life, his love, his goodness, such as they are, flow into him from +his Creator, in such measure as he is capable or desirous of receiving +them. And he may receive more at one time than at another. How shall he +know when he may lose the talismanic virtue that won her love--even +supposing he ever possessed it?" + +"I don't know how to argue," said Mary Leithe; "I can only feel when a +thing is true or not--or when I think it is--and say what I feel." + +"Well, I am wise enough to trust the truth of your feeling before any +argument." + +This assertion somewhat disconcerted Mary Leithe, who never liked to be +confronted with her own shadow, so to speak. However, she seemed +resolved on this occasion to give fuller utterance than usual to what +was in her mind; so, after a pause, she continued, "It is not only how +much we are capable of receiving from God, but the peculiar way in +which each one of us shows what is in him, that makes the difference in +people. It is not the talisman so much as the manner of using it that +wins a girl's love. And she may think one manner good until she comes +to know that another is better." + +"And, later, that another is better still?" + +"You trust my feeling less than you thought, you see," said Mary, +blushing, and with a tremor of her lips. + +"Perhaps I am afraid of trusting it too much," Drayton replied, fixing +his eyes upon her. Then he went on, with a changed tone and manner: +"This metaphysical discussion of ours reminds me of one of Emerson's +poems, whose book, by-the-by, I brought with me. Have you ever read +them?" + +"Very few of them," said Mary; "I don't seem to belong to them." + +"Not many people can eat them raw, I imagine," rejoined Drayton, +laughing. "They must be masticated by the mind before they can nourish +the heart, and some of them--However, the one I am thinking of is very +beautiful, take it how you will. It is called, 'Give all to Love.' Do +you know it!" + +Mary shook her head. + +"Then listen to it," said Drayton, and he read the poem to her. "What +do you think of it?" he asked when he had ended. + +"It is very short," said Mary, "and it is certainly beautiful; but I +don't understand some parts of it, and I don't think I like some other +parts." + +"It is a true poem," returned Drayton; "it has a body and a soul; the +body is beautiful, but the soul is more beautiful still; and where the +body seems incomplete, the soul is most nearly perfect. Be loyal, it +says, to the highest good you know; follow it through all difficulties +and dangers; make it the core of your heart and the life of your soul; +and yet, be free of it! For the hour may always be at hand when that +good that you have lived for and lived in must be given up. And +then--what says the poet? + + "'Though thou loved her as thyself, + As a self of purer clay, + Though her parting dims the day, + Stealing grace from all alive, + Heartily know, + When half-gods go, + The gods arrive.'" + +There was something ominous in Drayton's tone, quiet and pleasant +though it sounded to the ear, and Mary could not speak; she knew that +he would speak again, and that his words would bring the issue finally +before her. + +He shut the book and put it in his pocket. For some time he remained +silent, gazing eastward across the waves, which came from afar to break +against the rock at their feet. A small white pyramidal object stood up +against the horizon verge, and upon this Drayton's attention appeared +to be concentrated. + +"If you should ever decide to come," he said at length, "and want the +services of a courier who knows the ground well, I shall be at your +disposal." + +"Come where?" she said, falteringly. + +"Eastward. To Europe." + +"You will go with me?" + +"Hardly that. But I shall be there to receive you." + +"You are going back?" + +"In a month, or thereabouts." + +"Oh, Mr. Drayton! Why?" + +"Well, for several reasons. My coming here was an experiment. It might +have succeeded, but it was made too late. I am too old for this young +country. I love it, but I can be of no service to it. On the contrary, +so far as I was anything, I should be in the way. It does not need me, +and I have been an exile so long as to have lost my right to inflict +myself upon it. Yet I am glad to have been here; the little time that I +have been here has recompensed me for all the sorrows of my life, and I +shall never forget an hour of it as long as I live." + +"Are you quite sure that your country does not want you--need you?" + +"I should not like my assurance to be made more sure." + +"How can you know? Who has told you? Whom have you asked?" + +"There are some questions which it is not wise to put; questions whose +answers may seem ungracious to give, and are sad to hear." + +"But the answer might not seem so. And how can it be given until you +ask it?" + +Drayton turned and looked at her. His face was losing its resolute +composure, and there was a glow in his eyes and in his cheeks that +called up an answering warmth in her own. + +"Do you know where my country is?" he demanded, almost sternly. + +"It is where you are loved and wanted most, is it not?" she said, +breathlessly. + +"Do not deceive yourself--nor me!" exclaimed Drayton, putting out his +hand toward her, and half rising from the rock. "There is only one +thing more to say." + +A sea-gull flew close by them, and swept on, and in a moment was far +away, and lost to sight. So in our lives does happiness come so near us +as almost to brush our cheeks with its wings, and then pass on, and +become as unattainable as the stars. As Mary Leithe was about to speak, +a shadow cast from above fell across her face and figure. She seemed to +feel a sort of chill from it, warm though the day was; and without +moving her eyes from Drayton's face to see whence the shadow came, her +expression underwent a subtle and sudden change, losing the fervor of a +moment before, and becoming relaxed and dismayed. But after a moment +Drayton looked up, and immediately rose to his feet, exclaiming, "Frank +Redmond!" + +On the rock just above them stood a young man, dark of complexion, with +eager eyes, and a figure athletic and strong. As Drayton spoke his +name, his countenance assumed an expression half-way between pleased +surprise and jealous suspicion. Meanwhile Mary Leithe had covered her +face with her hands. + +"I'm sure I'd no idea you were here, Mr. Drayton," said the young man. +"I was looking for Mary Leithe. Is that she?" + +Mary uncovered her face, and rose to her feet languidly. She did not as +yet look toward Redmond, but she said in a low voice, "How do you do, +Frank? You--came so suddenly!" + +"I didn't stop to think--that I might interrupt you," said he, drawing +back a little and lifting his head. + +Drayton had been observing the two intently, breathing constrainedly +the while, and grasping a jutting point of rock with his hand as he +stood. He now said, in a genial and matter-of-fact voice, "Well, Master +Frank, I shall have an account to settle with you when you and my niece +have got through your first greetings." + +"Mary your niece!" cried Redmond, bewildered. + +"My niece by courtesy; her mother was a dear friend of mine before Mary +was born. And now it appears that she is the young lady, the dearest +and loveliest ever heard of, about whom you used to rhapsodize to me in +Dresden! Why didn't you tell me her name? By Jove, you young rogue, +I've a good mind to refuse my consent to the match! What if I had +married her off to some other young fellow, and you been left in the +lurch! However, luckily for you, I haven't been able thus far to find +any one who in my opinion--How do you do, Frank? You--came so suddenly!" + +"I didn't stop to think--that I might interrupt you," said he, drawing +back a little and lifting his head. + +Drayton had been observing the two intently, breathing constrainedly +the while, and grasping a jutting point of rock with his hand as he +stood. He now said, in a genial and matter-of-fact voice, "Well, Master +Frank, I shall have an account to settle with you when you and my niece +have got through your first greetings." + +"Mary your niece!" cried Redmond, bewildered. + +"My niece by courtesy; her mother was a dear friend of mine before Mary +was born. And now it appears that she is the young lady, the dearest +and loveliest ever heard of, about whom you used to rhapsodize to me in +Dresden! Why didn't you tell me her name? By Jove, you young rogue, +I've a good mind to refuse my consent to the match! What if I had +married her off to some other young fellow, and you been left in the +lurch! However, luckily for you, I haven't been able thus far to find +any one who in my opinion would suit her better. Come down here and +shake hands, Frank, and then I'll leave you to make your excuses to +Miss Leithe. And the next time you come back to her after a year's +absence, don't frighten her heart into her mouth by springing out on +her like a jack-in-the-box. Send a bunch of flowers or a signet-ring to +tell her you are coming, or you may get a cooler reception than you'd +like!" + +"Ah! Ambrose Drayton," he sighed to himself as he clambered down the +rocks alone, and sauntered along the shore, "there is no fool like an +old fool. Where were your eyes that you couldn't have seen what was the +matter? Her heart was fighting against itself all the time, poor child! +And you, selfish brute, bringing to bear on her all your antiquated +charms and fascinations--Heaven save the mark!--and bullying her into +the belief that you could make her happy! Thank God, Ambrose Drayton, +that your awakening did not come too late. A minute more would have +made her and you miserable for life--and Redmond too, confound him! And +yet they might have told me; one of them might have told me, surely. +Even at my age it is hard to remember one's own insignificance. And I +did love her! God knows how I loved her! I hope he loves her as much; +but how can he help it! And she--she won't remember long! An old fellow +who made believe he was her uncle, and made rather a fool of himself; +went back to Europe, and never been heard of since. Ah, me!" + +"Where did you get acquainted with Mr. Drayton, Frank?" + +"At Dresden. It was during the vacation at Freiberg last winter, and I +had come over to Dresden to have a good time. We stayed at the same +hotel. We played a game of billiards together, and he chatted with me +about America, and asked me about my mining studies at Freiberg; and I +thought him about the best fellow I'd ever met. But I didn't know +then--I hadn't any conception what a splendid fellow he really was. If +ever I hear anybody talking of their ideal of a gentleman, I shall ask +them if they ever met Ambrose Drayton." + +"What did he do?" + +"Well, the story isn't much to my credit; if it hadn't been for him, +you might never have heard of me again; and it will serve me right to +confess the whole thing to you. It's about a--woman." + +"What sort of a woman?" + +"She called herself a countess; but there's no telling what she really +was. I only know she got me into a fearful scrape, and if it hadn't +been for Mr. Drayton--" + +"Did you do anything wrong, Frank?" + +"No; upon my honor as a gentleman! If I had, Mary, I wouldn't be here +now." + +Mary looked at him with a sad face. "Of course I believe you, Frank," +she said. "But I think I would rather not hear any more about it." + +"Well, I'll only tell you what Mr. Drayton did. I told him all about +it--how it began, and how it went on, and all; and how I was engaged to +a girl in America--I didn't tell him your name; and I wasn't sure, +then, whether you'd ever marry me, after all; because, you know, you +had been awfully angry with me before I went away, because I wanted to +study in Europe instead of staying at home. But, you see, I've got my +diploma, and that'll give me a better start than I ever should have had +if I'd only studied here. However--what was I saying? Oh! so he said he +would find out about the countess, and talk to her himself. And how he +managed I don't know; and he gave me a tremendous hauling over the +coals for having been such an idiot; but it seems that instead of being +a poor injured, deceived creature, with a broken heart, and all that +sort of thing, she was a regular adventuress--an old hand at it, and +had got lots of money out of other fellows for fear she would make a +row. But Mr. Drayton had an interview with her. I was there, and I +never shall forget it if I live to a hundred. You never saw anybody so +quiet, so courteous, so resolute, and so immitigably stern as he was. +And yet he seemed to be stern only against the wrong she was trying to +do, and to be feeling kindness and compassion for her all the time. She +tried everything she knew, but it wasn't a bit of use, and at last she +broke down and cried, and carried on like a child. Then Mr. Drayton +took her out of the room, and I don't know what happened, but I've +always suspected that he sent her off with money enough in her pocket +to become an honest woman with if she chose to; but he never would +admit it to me. He came back to me after a while, and told me to have +nothing more to do with any woman, good or bad except the woman I meant +to marry, and I promised him I wouldn't, and I kept my promise. But we +have him to thank for our happiness, Mary." + +Tears came silently into Mary's eyes; she said nothing, but sat with +her hands clasped around one knee, gazing seaward. + +"You don't seem very happy, though," pursued Redmond, after a pause; +"and you acted so oddly when I first found you and Mr. Drayton +together--I almost thought--well, I didn't know what to think. You do +love me, don't you?" + +For a few moments Mary Leithe sat quite motionless, save for a slight +tremor of the nerves that pervaded her whole body; and then, all at +once, she melted into sobs. Redmond could not imagine what was the +matter with her; but he put his arms round her, and after a little +hesitation or resistance, the girl hid her face upon his shoulder, and +wept for the secret that she would never tell. + +But Mary Leithe's nature was not a stubborn one, and easily adapted +itself to the influences with which she was most closely in contact. +When she and Redmond presented themselves at Aunt Corwin's cottage that +evening her tears were dried, and only a tender dimness of the eyes and +a droop of her sweet mouth betrayed that she had shed any. + +"Mr. Drayton wanted to be remembered to you, Mary," observed Aunt +Corwin, shortly before going to bed. She had been floating colored +sea-weeds on paper all the time since supper, and had scarcely spoken a +dozen words. + +"Has he gone?" Mary asked. + +"Who? Oh, yes; he had a telegram, I believe. His trunks were to follow +him. He said he would write. I liked that man. He was not like Mr. +Haymaker; he was a gentleman. He took an interest in my collections, +and gave me several nice specimens. Your mother was a fool not to have +married him. I wish you could have married him yourself. But it was not +to be expected that he would care for a child like you, even if your +head were not turned by that Frank Redmond. How soon shall you let him +marry you?" + +"Whenever he likes," answered Mary Leithe, turning away. + +As a matter of fact, they were married the following winter. A week +before the ceremony a letter arrived for Mary from New York, addressed +in a legal hand. It contained an intimation that, in accordance with +the instructions of their client, Mr. Ambrose Drayton, the undersigned +had placed to her account the sum of fifty thousand dollars as a +preliminary bequest, it being the intention of Mr. Drayton to make her +his heir. There was an inclosure from Drayton himself, which Mary, +after a moment's hesitation, placed in her lover's hand, and bade him +break the seal. + +It contained only a few lines, wishing happiness to the bride and +bridegroom, and hoping they all might meet in Europe, should the +wedding trip extend so far. "And as for you, my dear niece," continued +the writer, "whenever you think of me remember that little poem of +Emerson's that we read on the rocks the last time I saw you. The longer +I live the more of truth do I find in it, especially in the last verse: + + "'Heartily know, + When half-gods go, + The gods arrive!'" + +"What does that mean?" demanded Redmond, looking up from the letter. + +"We can not know except by experience," answered Mary Leithe. + + + + +"SET NOT THY FOOT ON GRAVES." + + +_New York_, _April 29th_.--Last night I came upon this passage in my +old author: "Friend, take it sadly home to thee--Age and Youthe are +strangers still. Youthe, being ignorant of the wisdome of Age, which is +Experience, but wise with its own wisdome, which is of the unshackeled +Soule, or Intuition, is great in Enterprise, but slack in Achievement. +Holding itself equal to all attempts and conditions, and to be heir, +not of its own spanne of yeares and compasse of Faculties only, but of +all time and all Human Nature--such, I saye, being its illusion (if, +indeede, it be illusion, and not in some sorte a Truth), it still +underrateth the value of Opportunitie, and, in the vain beleefe that +the City of its Expectation is paved with Golde and walled with +Precious Stones, letteth slip betwixt its fingers those diamondes and +treasures which ironical Fate offereth it.... But see nowe what the +case is when this youthe becometh in yeares. For nowe he can nowise +understand what defecte of Judgmente (or effecte of insanitie rather) +did leade him so to despise and, as it were, reject those Giftes and +golden chaunces which come but once to mortal men. Experience (that +saturnine Pedagogue) hath taught him what manner of man he is, and +that, farre from enjoying that Deceptive Seeminge or mirage of Freedome +which would persuade him that he may run hither and thither as the whim +prompteth over the face of the Earthe--yea, take the wings of the +morninge and winnowe his aerie way to the Pleiadies--he must e'en plod +heavilie and with paine along that single and narrowe Path whereto the +limitations of his personal nature and profession confine him--happy if +he arrive with muche diligence and faire credit at the ende thereof, +and falle not ignobly by the way. Neverthelesse--for so great is the +infatuation of man, who, although he acquireth all other knowledge, yet +arriveth not at the knowledge of Himself--if to the Sage of Experience +he proffered once again the gauds and prizes of youthe, which he hath +ever since regretted and longed for--what doeth he in his wisdome? +Verilie, so longe as the matter remaineth _in nubibis_, as the Latins +say, or in the Region of the Imagination, as oure speeche hath it, he +will beleeve, yea, take his oathe, that he still is master of all those +capacities and energies whiche, in his youthe, would have prompted and +enabled him to profit by this desired occurrence. Yet shall it appeare +(if the thinge be brought still further to the teste, and, from an +Imagination or Dreame, become an actual Realitie), that he will shrinke +from and decline that which he did erste so ardently sigh for and +covet. And the reason of this is as follows, to-wit: That Habit or +Custome hath brought him more to love and affect those very ways and +conditions of life, yea, those inconveniences and deficiencies which he +useth to deplore and abhorre, than that Crown of Golde or Jewel of +Happiness whose withholding he hath all his life lamented. Hence we may +learne, that what is past, is dead, and that though thoughts be free, +nature is ever captive, and loveth her chaine." + +This is too lugubrious and cynical not to have some truth in it; but I +am unwilling to believe that more than half of it is true. The author +himself was evidently an old man, and therefore a prejudiced judge; and +he did not make allowances for the range and variety of temperament. +Age is not a matter of years, and scarcely of experience. The only +really old persons are the selfish ones. The man whose thoughts, +actions, and affections center upon himself, soon acquires a fixity and +crustiness which (if to be old is to be "strange to youth") is old as +nothing else is. But the man who makes the welfare and happiness of +others his happiness, is as young at threescore as he was at twenty, +and perhaps even younger, for he has had no time to grow old. + +_April 30th_.--The Courtneys are in town! This is, I believe, her first +visit to America since he married her. At all events, I have not seen +or heard of her in all these seven years. I wonder ... I was going to +write, I wonder whether she remembers me. Of course she remembers me, +in a sort of way. I am tied up somewhere among her bundle of +recollections, and occasionally, in an idle moment, her eye falls upon +me, and moves her, perhaps, to smile or to sigh. For my own part, in +thinking over our old days, I find I forget her less than I had +supposed. Probably she has been more or less consciously in my mind +throughout. In the same way, one has always latent within him the +knowledge that he must die; but it does not follow that he is +continually musing on the thought of death. As with death, so with this +old love of mine. What a difference, if we had married! She was a very +lovely girl--at least, I thought so then. Very likely I should not +think her so now. My taste and knowledge have developed; a different +order of things interests me. It may not be an altogether pleasant +thing to confess; but, knowing myself as I now do, I have often thanked +my stars that I am a bachelor. + +Doubtless she is even more changed than I am. A woman changes more than +a man in seven years, and a married woman especially must change a +great deal from twenty-two to twenty-nine. Think of Ethel Leigh being +in her thirtieth year! and the mother of four or five children, +perhaps. Well, for the matter of that, think of the romantic and +ambitious young Claude Campbell being an old bachelor of forty! I have +married Art instead of Ethel, and she, instead of being Mrs. Campbell, +is Mrs. Courtney. + +It was a surprising thing--her marrying him so suddenly. But, +appearances to the contrary notwithstanding, I have never quite made up +my mind that Ethel was really fickle. She did it out of pique, or +pride, or impulse, or whatever it is that sways women in such cases. +She was angry, or indignant--how like fire and ice at once she was when +she was angry!--and she was resolved to show me that she could do +without me. She would not listen to my explanations; and I was always +awkward and stiff about making explanations. Besides, it was not an +easy matter to explain, especially to a girl like her. With a married +woman or a widow it would have been a simple thing enough. But Ethel +Leigh, the minister's daughter--innocent, ignorant, passionate--she +would tolerate nothing short of a public disavowal and discontinuance +of my relations with Mrs. Murray, and that, of course, I could not +consent to, though heaven knows (and so must Ethel, by this time) that +Mrs. Murray was nothing to me save as she was the wife of my friend, +during whose enforced absence I was bound to look after her, to some +extent. It was not my fault that poor Mrs. Murray was a fool. But such +are the trumpery seeds from which tragedies grow. Not that ours was a +tragedy, exactly: Ethel married her English admirer, and I became a +somewhat distinguished artist, that is all. I wonder whether she has +been happy! Likely enough; she was born to be wealthy; Englishmen make +good husbands sometimes, and her London life must have been a brilliant +one.... I have been looking at my old photograph of her--the one she +gave me the morning after we were engaged. Tall, slender, dark, with +level brows, and the bearing of a Diana. She certainly was handsome, +and I shall not run the risk of spoiling this fine memory by calling on +her. Even if she have not deteriorated, she can scarcely have improved. +Nay, even were she the same now as then, I should not find her so, +because of the change in myself. Why should I blink the truth? +Experience, culture, and the sober second thought of middle age have +carried me far beyond the point where I could any longer be in sympathy +with this crude, thin-skinned, impulsive girl. And then--four or five +children! Decidedly, I will give her a wide berth. And Courtney +himself, with his big beard, small brain, and obtrusive laugh! I shall +step across to California for a few months. + +_May 1st_.--Called this morning on Ethel Leigh--Mrs. Deighton Courtney, +that is to say. She is not so much changed, but she has certainly +improved. When I say she has not changed much, I refer to her physical +appearance. Her features are scarcely altered; her figure is a little +fuller and more compact; in her bearing there is a certain quiet +composure and self-possession--the air of a woman who has seen the +world, has received admiration, and is familiar with the graceful +little arts of social intercourse. In short, she has acquired a high +external polish; and that is precisely what she most needed. Evidently, +too, there is an increased mental refinement corresponding to the +outward manner. She has mellowed, sweetened--whether deepened or not I +should hesitate to affirm. But I am quite sure that I find her more +charming to talk with, more supple in intercourse, more fascinating, in +a word, than formerly. We chatted discursively and rather volubly for +more than an hour; yet we did not touch on anything very serious or +profound. They are staying at the Brevoort House. Courtney himself, +by-the-by, is still in Boston (they landed there), where business will +detain him a few days. Ethel goes on a house-hunting expedition +to-morrow, and I am going with her; for New York has altered out of her +recollection during these seven years. They are to remain here three +years, perhaps longer. Courtney is to establish and oversee an American +branch of his English business. + +They have only one child--a pretty little thing: Susie and I became +great friends. + +Mrs. Courtney opened the door of the private sitting-room in which I +was awaiting her, and came in--beautifully! She has learned how to do +that since I knew her. My own long residence in Paris has made me more +critical than I used to be in such matters; but I do not remember +having met any woman in society with manners more nearly perfect than +Mrs. Courtney's. Ethel Leigh used to be, upon occasion, painfully +abrupt and disconcerting; and her movements and attitudes, though there +was abundant native grace in them, were often careless and +unconventional. Of course, I do not forget that niceties of deportment, +without sound qualities of mind and heart to back them, are of trifling +value; but the two kinds of attraction are by no means incompatible +with each other. Mrs. Courtney smiles often. Ethel Leigh used to smile +rarely, although, when the smile did come, it was irresistibly winning; +there was in it exquisite significance and tenderness. It is a +beautiful smile still, but that charm of rarity (if it be a charm) is +lacking. It is a conventional smile more than a spontaneous or a happy +one; indeed, it led me to surmise that she had perhaps not been very +happy since we last met, and had learned to use this smile as a sort of +veil. Not that I suppose for a moment that Courtney has ill-treated +her. I never could see anything in the man beyond a superficial +comeliness, a talent for business, and an affable temper; but ho was +not in any sense a bad fellow. Besides, he was over head and ears in +love with her; and Ethel would be sure to have the upper hand of a +nature like his. No, her unhappiness, if she be unhappy, would be due +to no such cause, she and her husband are no doubt on good terms with +each other. But--suppose she has discovered that he fell short of what +she demanded in a husband; that she overmatched him; that, in order to +make their life smooth, she must descend to him? I imagine it may be +something of that kind. Poor Mrs. Courtney! + +She addressed me as "Mr. Campbell," and I dare say she was right. Women +best know how to meet these situations. To have called me "Claude" +would have placed us in a false position, by ignoring the changes that +have taken place. It is wise to respect these barriers; they are +conventional, but, rightly considered, they are more of an assistance +than of an obstacle to freedom of intercourse. I asked her how she +liked England. She smiled and said, "It was my business to like +England; still, I am glad to see America once more." + +"You will entertain a great deal, I presume--that sort of thing?" + +"We shall hope to make friends with people--and to meet old friends. It +is such a pleasant surprise to find you here. I heard you were settled +in Paris." + +"So I was, for several years; the Parisians said nice things about my +pictures. But one may weary even of Paris. I returned here two years +ago, and am now as much of a fixture in New York as if I'd never left +it." + +"But not a permanent fixture. Shall we never see you in London?" + +"My present probabilities lie rather in the direction of California. I +want to make some studies of the scenery and the atmosphere. Besides, I +am getting too old to think of another European residence." + +"No one gets old after thirty--especially no bachelor!" she answered, +with a smile. "But if you were ever to feel old, the society of London +would rejuvenate you." + +"It has certainly done you no harm. But you have the happiness to be +married." + +She looked at me pleasantly and said, "Yes, I make a good +Englishwoman." That sounded like an evasion, but the expression of her +face was not evasive. In the old days she would probably have flushed +up and said something cutting. + +"You must see my little girl," she said, after a while. + +The child was called, and presently came in. She resembles her mother, +and has a vivacity scarcely characteristic of English children. I am +not constitutionally a worshiper of children, but I liked Susie. She +put her arms round her mother's arm, and gazed at me with wide-eyed +scrutiny. + +"This is Mr. Campbell," said mamma. + +"My name is Susan Courtney," said the little thing. "We are going to +stay in New York three years. Hot here--this is only an hotel--we are +going to have a house. How do you do? This is my dolly." + +I saluted dolly, and thereby inspired its parent with confidence: she +put her hand in mine, and gave me her smooth little cheek to kiss. "You +are not like papa," she then observed. + +I smiled conciliatingly, being uncertain whether it were prudent to +follow this lead; but Mrs. Courtney asked, "In what way different, +dear?" + +"Papa has a beard," replied Susie. + +The incident rather struck me; it seemed to indicate that Mrs. Courtney +was under no apprehension that the child would say anything +embarrassing about the father. Having learned so much, I ventured +farther. + +"Do you love papa or mamma best?" I inquired. + +"I am with mamma most," she answered, after meditation, "but when papa +comes, I like him." + +This was non-committal. She continued, "Papa is coming here day after +to-morrow. To-morrow, mamma and I are going to find a house." + +"Your husband leaves all that to you?" I said, turning to Mrs. Courtney. + +"Mr. Courtney never knows or cares what sort of a place he lives in. It +took me some little time to get used to that. I wanted everything to be +just in a certain way. They used to laugh at me, and say I was more +English than he." + +"Now that you are both here, you must both be American." + +"He doesn't enjoy America much. Of course, it is very different from +London. An Englishman can not be expected to care for American ways and +American quickness, and--" + +"American people?" I put in, laughingly. + +"Don't undress dolly here," she said to Susie. "It isn't time yet to +put her to bed, and she might catch cold." + +Was this another evasion? The serene face betrayed nothing, but she had +left unanswered the question that aimed at discovering how she and her +husband stood toward each other. After all, however, no answer could +have told me more than her no answer did--supposing it to have been +intentional. I soon afterward took my leave, after having arranged to +call to-morrow and accompany her and Susie on their house-hunting +expedition. Upon the whole, I don't think I am sorry to have renewed my +acquaintance with her. She is more delightful--as an acquaintance--than +when I knew her formerly. Should I have fallen in love with her had I +met her for the first time as she is now? Yes, and no! In the old days +there was something about her that commanded me--that fascinated my +youthful imagination. Perhaps it was only the freshness, the ignorance, +the timidity of young maidenhood--that mystery of possibilities of a +nature that has not yet met the world and received its impress for good +or evil. It is this which captivates in youth; and this, of course, +Mrs. Courtney has lost. But every quality that might captivate mature +manhood is hers, and, were I likely to think of marriage now, and were +she marriageable, she is the type of woman I would choose. Yet I do not +quite relish the perception that my present feminine ideal (whether it +be lower or higher) is not the former one. But,--frankly, would I marry +her if I could? I hardly know: I have got out of the habit of regarding +marriage as among my possibilities; many avenues of happiness that once +were open to me are now closed against me. Put it, that I have lost a +faculty--that I am now able to enjoy only in imagination a phase of +existence that, formerly, I could have enjoyed in fact. This bit of +self-analysis may be erroneous; but I would not like to run the risk of +proving it so! Am I not well enough off as I am? My health is fair, my +mind active, my reputation secure, my finances prosperous. The things +that I can dream must surely be better than anything that could happen. +I can picture, for example, a state of matrimonial felicity which no +marriage of mine could realize. Besides, I can, whenever I choose, see +Mrs. Courtney herself, talk with her, and enjoy her as a reasonable and +congenial friend, apart from the danger and disappointment that might +result from a closer connection. I think I have chosen the wiser part, +or, rather, the wiser part has been thrust upon me. That I shall never +be wildly happy is, at least, security that I shall never be profoundly +miserable. I shall simply be comfortable. Is this sour grapes? Am I, if +not counting, then discounting my eggs before they are hatched? To such +questions a practical--a materialized--answer would be the only +conclusive one. Were Mrs. Courtney ready to drop into my mouth, I +should either open my mouth, or else I should shut it, and either act +would be conclusive. But, so far from being ready to drop into my +mouth, she is immovably and (to all appearances) contentedly fixed +where she is. I suppose I am insinuating that appearances are +deceptive; that she may be unhappy with her husband, and desire to +leave him. Well, there is no technical evidence in support of such an +hypothesis; but, again, in a matter of this kind, it is not so much the +technical as the indirect evidence that tells--the cadences of the +voice, the breathing, the silences, the atmosphere. There is no denying +that I did somehow acquire a vague impression that Courtney is not so +large a figure in his wife's eyes as he might be. I may have been +biased by my previous conception of his character, or I may have +misinterpreted the impalpable, indescribable signs that I remarked in +her. But, once more, how do I know that her not caring for him would +postulate her caring for me? Why should she care for either of us? Our +old romance is to her as the memory of something read in a book, and it +is powerless to make her heart beat one throb the faster. Were Courtney +to die to-morrow, would his widow expect me to marry her? Not she! She +would settle down here quietly, educate her daughter, and think better +of her departed husband with every year that passed, and less of +repeating the experiment that made her his! I may be prone to romantic +and elaborate speculations, but I am not exactly a fool. I do not +delude myself with the idea that Mrs. Courtney is, at this moment, +following my example by recording her impressions of me at her own +writing-desk, and asking herself whether--if such and such a thing were +to happen--such another would be apt to follow. No; she has put Susie +to bed, and is by this time asleep herself, after having read through +the "Post," or "Bazar," or the last new novel, as her predilection may +be. It is after midnight; since she has not followed my example, I will +follow hers; it is much the more sensible of the two. + +_May 2d_.--What a woman she is! and, in a different sense, what a man I +am! How little does a man know or suspect himself until he is brought +to the proof! How serenely and securely I philosophized and laid down +the law yesterday! and to-day, how strange to contrast the event with +my prognostication of it! And yet, again, how little has happened that +might not be told in such a way as to appear nothing! It was the latent +meaning, the spirit, the touch of look and tone. Her husband may have +reached New York by this time; they may be together at this moment; he +will find no perceptible change in her--perceptible to him! He will be +told that I have been her escort during the day, and that I was polite +and serviceable, and that a house has been selected. What more is there +to tell? Nothing--that he could hear or understand! and +yet--everything! He will say, "Yes, I recollect Campbell; nice fellow; +have him to dine with us one of these days." But I shall never sit at +their table; I shall never see her again; I can not! I shall start for +California next week. Meanwhile I will write down the history of one +day, for it is well to have these things set visibly before one--to +grasp the nettle, as it were. Nothing is so formidable as it appears +when we shrink from defining it to ourselves. + +I drove to the hotel in my brougham at eleven o'clock, as we had +previously arranged. She was ready and waiting for me, and little Susie +was with her. Ethel was charmingly dressed, and there was a soft look +in her eyes as she turned them on me--a look that seemed to say, "I +remember the past; it is pleasant to see you, so pleasant as to be +sad!" Susie came to me as if I were an old friend, and I lifted the +child from the floor and kissed her twice. + +"Why did you give me two kisses?" she demanded, as I put her down. +"Papa always gives me only one kiss." + +"Papa has mamma as well as you to kiss; but I have no one; I am an old +bachelor." + +"When you have known mamma longer, will you kiss her too?" + +"Old bachelors kiss nobody but little girls," I replied, laughing. + +"We went down to the brougham, and after we were seated and on our +way," Ethel said, "Already I feel so much at home in New York, it +almost startles me. I fancied I should have forgotten old +associations--should have grown out of sympathy with them; but I seem +only to have learned to appreciate them more. Our memory for some +things is better than we would believe." + +"There are two memories in us," I remarked; "the memory of the heart +and the memory of the head. The former never is lost, though the other +may be. But I had not supposed that you cared very deeply for the +American period of your life." + +"England is very agreeable," she said, rather hastily. She turned her +head and looked out of the window; but after a pause she added, as if +to herself, "but I am an American!" + +"There is, no doubt, a deep-rooted and substantial repose in English +life such as is scarcely to be found elsewhere," I said; "but, for all +that, I have often thought that the best part of domestic happiness +could exist nowhere but here. Here a man may marry the woman he loves, +and their affection for each other will be made stronger by the +hardships they may have to pass through. After all, when we come to the +end of our lives, it is not the business we have done, nor the social +distinction we have enjoyed--it is the love we have given and received +that we are glad of." + +"Mamma," inquired Susie, "does Mr. Campbell love you?" + +We both of us looked at the child and laughed a little. "Mr. Campbell +is an old friend," said Ethel. After a few moments she blushed. She +held in her hand some house-agents' orders to view houses, and these +she now began to examine. "Is this Madison Avenue place likely to be a +good one?" she asked me. + +"It is conveniently situated and comfortable; but I should think it +might be too large for a family of three. Perhaps, though, you don't +like a close fit?" + +"I don't like empty rooms, though I prefer such rooms as there are to +be large. But it doesn't make much difference. Mr. Courtney moves about +a good deal, and he is as happy in a hotel as anywhere. These American +hotels are luxurious and splendid, but they are not home-like to me." + +"I remember you used to dislike being among a crowd of people you +didn't know." + +"Yes, and I haven't yet learned to be sociable in that way. A friend is +more company for me than a score of acquaintances. Dear me! I'm afraid +New York will spoil me--for England!" + +"Perhaps Mr. Courtney may be cured of England by New York." + +She smiled and said, "Perhaps! He accommodates himself to things more +easily than I do, but I think one needs to be born in America to know +how to love it." + +Under the veil of discussing America and things in general, we were +talking of ourselves, awakening reminiscences of the past, and +discovering, with a pleasure we did not venture to acknowledge, +that--allowing for the events and the years that had come between--we +were as much in accord as when we were young lovers. Yes, as much, and +perhaps even more. For surely, if one grows in the right way, the +sphere of knowledge and sympathy must enlarge, and thereby the various +points of contact between two minds and hearts must be multiplied. +Ethel and I, during these seven years, had traveled our round of daily +life on different sides of the earth; but the miles of sea and land +which had physically separated us had been powerless to estrange our +spirits. Nothing is more strange, in this mysterious complexity of +impressions and events that we call human existence, than the fact that +two beings, entirely cut off from all natural means of association and +communion, may yet, unknown to each other, be breathing the same +spiritual air and learning the same moral and intellectual lessons. +Like two seeds of the same species, planted, the one in American soil, +the other in English, Ethel and I had selected, by some instinct of the +soul, the same elements from our different surroundings; so that now, +when we met once more, we found a close and harmonious resemblance +between the leaves and blossoms of our experience. What can be more +touching and delightful than such a discovery? Or what more sad than to +know that it came too late for us to profit by it? + +Oh, Ethel, how easy it is to take the little step that separates light +from darkness, happiness from misery! Remembering that we live but +once, and that the worthy enjoyments of life are so limited in number +and so hard to get, it seems unjust and monstrous that one little hour +of jealousy or misunderstanding should wreck the fair prospects of +months and years. Why is mischief so much readier to our hand than good? + +We got out at a house near the Park. I assisted Ethel to alight, and, +as her hand rested on mine, the thought crossed my mind--How sweet if +this were our own home that we are about to enter!--and I glanced at +her face to see whether a like thought had visited her. She maintained +a subdued demeanor, with an expression about the mouth and eyes of a +peculiar timid gentleness, and, as it were, a sort of mental leaning +upon me for support and protection. She felt, it may be, a little fear +of herself, at finding herself--in more senses than one--so near to me; +and, woman-like, she depended upon me to protect her against the very +peril of which I was the occasion. No higher or more delicate +compliment can be paid by a woman to a man; and I resolved that I would +do what in me lay to deserve it. But such resolutions are the hardest +in the world to keep, because the circumstance or the impulse of the +moment is continually in wait to betray you. Ethel was more fascinating +and lovely in this mood than in any other I had hitherto seen her in; +and the misgiving, from which I could not free myself, that the man +whom Fate had made her husband did not appreciate or properly cherish +the gift bestowed upon him, made me warm toward her more than ever. I +could scarcely have believed that such blood could flow in the sober +veins of my middle age; but love knows nothing of time or age! + +"I do not like this house," Susie declared, when we had been admitted +by the care-taker. "It has no carpets, nor chairs, nor pictures; and +the floor is dirty; and the walls are not pretty!" + +"I suppose one can have these houses decorated and furnished at short +notice?" Ethel asked me. + +"It would not take long. There are several firms that make it their +specialty." + +"I have always wanted to live in a house where the colors and forms +were to my taste. I don't know whether you remember that you used to +think I had some taste in such matters. Mr. Courtney, of course, +doesn't care much about art, and he didn't encourage me to carry out my +ideas. A business man can not be an artist, you know." + +"You yourself would have become an artist if--" I began; but I was +approaching dangerous ground, and I stopped. "This dining-room might be +done in Indian red," I remarked--"the woodwork, that is to say. The +walls would be a warm salmon color, which contrasts well with the cold +blue of the china, which it is the fashion to have about nowadays. As +for the furniture, antique dark oak is as safe as anything, don't you +think so?" + +"I should like all that," said she, moving a little nearer me, and +letting her eyes wander about the room with a pleased expression, until +at length they met my own. "If you could only design our decoration for +us, I'm sure it would be perfect; at least, I should be satisfied. +Well, and how should we... how ought the drawing-room to be done?" + +"There is a shade of yellow that is very agreeable for drawing-rooms, +and it goes very well with the dull peacock-blue which is in vogue now. +Then you could get one of those bloomy Morris friezes. There is some +very graceful Chippendale to be picked up in various places. And no +such good furniture is made nowadays. But I am advising you too much +from the artist's point of view." + +"Oh, I can get other sort of advice when I want it." She looked at me +with a smile; our glances met more often now than at first. "But it +seems to me," she went on, "that the way the house is built docs not +suit the way we want to decorate it. Let us look at a smaller one. I +should think ten rooms would be quite enough. And it would be nice to +have a corner house, would it not?" + +"If the question were only of our agreement, there would probably not +be much difficulty," I said, in a tone which I tried to make merely +courteous, but which may have revealed something more than courtesy +beneath it. + +In coming down-stairs she gathered her dress in her right hand and put +her left in my arm; and then, in a flash, the picture came before me of +the last time we had gone arm-in-arm together down-stairs. It was at +her father's house, and she was speaking to me of that unlucky Mrs. +Murray; we had our quarrel that evening in the drawing-room, and it was +never made up. From then till now, what a gulf! and yet those years +would have been but a bridge to pass over, save for the one barrier +that was insurmountable between us. + +"What has become of that Mrs. Murray whom you used to know?" she asked, +as we reached the foot of the stairs. She relinquished my arm as she +spoke, and faced me. + +I felt the blood come to my face. "Mrs. Murray was in my thoughts at +the same moment--and perhaps by the same train of associations." I +answered, "I don't know where she is now; I lost sight of her years +ago--soon after you were married, in fact. Why do you ask?" + +"You had not forgotten her, then?" + +"I had every reason to forget her, except the one reason for which I +have remembered her--and you know what that is! Have you mistrusted me +all this time?" + +"Oh, no--no! I don't think I really mistrusted you at all; and long ago +I admitted to myself that you had acted unselfishly and honorably. But +I was angry at the time; you know, sometimes a girl will be angry, even +when there is no good reason for it. I have long wished for an +opportunity to tell you this, for my own sake, you know, as well as for +yours." + +"I hardly know whether I am most glad or sorry to hear this," I said, +as we moved toward the door. "If you had only been able to say it, or +to think it, before ... there would have been a great difference!" + +"The worst of mistakes is, they are so seldom set right at the time, or +in the way they ought to be. Come, Susie, we are going away now. Susie, +do you most like to be American or English?" + +"English," replied Susie, without hesitation. + +Her mother turned to me and said in a low tone: + +"I love her, whichever she is." + +I understood what she meant. Susie was the symbol of that inevitable +element in our lives which seems to evolve itself without reference to +our desires or efforts; but which, nevertheless, when we have +recognized that it is inevitable, we learn (if we are wise) to accept +and even to love. Save for the estrangement between Ethel and myself, +Susie would never have existed; yet there she was, a beautiful child, +who had as good a right to be as either of us; and her mother loved +her, and, as it were, bade me love her also. I took the little maiden +by the hand and said, "You are right, Susie; the Americans are the +children of the English, and can not expect to be so wise and +comfortable as they. But you must remember that the Americans have a +future before them, and we are not enemies any more. Will you be +friends with me, and let me call you my little girl?" + +"I shouldn't mind being your little girl, if I could still have the +same mamma," was Susie's reply. "Papa is away a great deal, and you +could be papa, you know, until he came back." + +I made some laughing answer; but, in fact, Susie's frank analysis of +the situation poignantly kindled an imagination which stood in no need +of stimulus. Ah, if this were the Golden Age, when love never went +astray, how happy we might be! But it is not the Golden Age--far from +it! Meanwhile, I think I can assert, with a clear conscience, that no +dishonorable purpose possessed me. I loved Ethel too profoundly to wish +to do her wrong. Yet I may have wished--I did wish--that a kindly +Providence might have seen fit to remove the disabilities that +controlled us. If a wish could have removed Courtney painlessly to +another world, I think I should have wished it. There was something +exquisitely touching in Ethel's appearance and manner. She is as pure +as any woman that ever lived; but she is a woman! and I felt that, for +this day, I had a man's power over her. Occasionally I was conscious +that her eyes were resting on my face; when I addressed her, her aspect +softened and brightened; she fell into little moods of preoccupation +from which she would emerge with a sigh; in many ways she betrayed, +without knowing it, the secret that neither of us would mention. I do +not mean to imply that she expected me to mention it. A pure woman does +not realize the dangers of the world; and that very fact is itself her +strongest security against them. But, had I spoken, she would have +responded. It was a temptation which I could hardly have believed I +could have resisted as I did; but such a woman calls out all that is +best and noblest in a man; and, at the time, I was better than I am! + +When we were in the brougham again, I said, "If you will allow me, I +will drive you to a house I have seen, which belongs to a man with whom +I am slightly acquainted. He is on the point of leaving it, but his +furniture is still in it, and, as he is himself an artist and a man of +taste, it will be worth your while to look at it. He is rather deaf, +but that is all the better; we can express our opinions without +disturbing him. Perhaps you might arrange to take house and furniture +as they stand." + +"Whatever you advise, I shall like to do," Ethel answered. + +We presently arrived at the house, which was situated in the upper part +of the town, a little to the west of Fifth Avenue. It was a comely +gabled edifice of red brick, with square bay-windows and a roomy porch. +The occupant, Maler, a German, happened to be at home; and on my +sending in my card, we were admitted at once, and he came to greet us +in the hall in his usual hearty, headlong fashion. + +"My good Campbell," he exclaimed, in his blundering English, "very +delighted to see you. Ah, dis will be madame, and de little maid! So +you are married since some time--I have not know it! Your servant, +Madame Campbell. I know--all de artists know--your husband: we wish we +could paint how he can--but it is impossible! Ha, ha, ha! not so! Now, +I am very pleased you shall see dis house. May I beg de honor of +accompany you? First you shall see de studio; dat I call de stomach of +de house, eh? because it is most important of all de places, and make +de rest of de places live. See, I make dat window be put in--you find +no better light in New York. Den you see, here we have de alcove, where +Madame Campbell shall sit and make her sewing, while de husband do his +work on de easel. How you like dat portiere? I design him myself--oh, +yes, I do all here; you keep them if you like; I go to Germany, perhaps +not come back after some years, so I leave dem, not so? Now I show you +my little chamber of the piano. See, I make an arched ceiling--groined +arch, eh?--and I gild him; so I get pretty light and pretty sound, not? +Ah! madame, I have not de happiness to be married, but I make my house +so, dat if I get me a wife, she find all ready; but no wife come, so I +give him over to Herr Campbell and you. Now we mount up-stairs to de +bed-rooms, eh?" + +In this way he went over the entire house with us. His loud, jolly +voice, his resounding laugh, his bustling manner, his heedless, +boy-like self-confidence, and his deafness, made it impossible to get +in a word of explanation, and, after a few efforts, I gave up the +attempt. + +"Let him suppose what he likes," I said aside to Ethel, "it can make no +difference; he is going away, and you will never see him again. After +all these years, it can do no great harm for us to play at being Mr. +and Mrs. Campbell for an hour!" + +"It is a very beautiful house," she said, tacitly accepting what I had +proposed. "It is such a house as I have always dreamed of living in. I +shall not care to look at any others. Will you tell him that we--that I +will take it just as it stands. You have made this a very pleasant day +for me--a very happy day," she added, in a lower tone. "Every room here +will be associated with you. You will come here often and see me, will +you not? Perhaps, after all, you might use the studio to paint my--or +Susie's portrait in." + +"I shall inflict myself upon you very often, I have no doubt," was all +I ventured to reply. I could not tell her, at that moment, that we must +never see each other again. She--after the manner of women--probably +supposes that a man's strength is limitless; that he may do with +himself and make of himself what he chooses; and she supposes that I +could visit her and converse with her day after day, and yet keep my +thoughts and my acts within such bounds as would enable me to take +Courtney honestly by the hand. But I know too well my own weakness, and +I shall leave her while yet I have power to do so. Tomorrow--or soon--I +will write to her one last letter, telling her why I go. + +Sudden and strange indeed has been this passionate episode in a life +which, methought, had done with passion. It has lasted hardly so many +hours as I have lived years; and yet, were I to live on into the next +century, it would never cease to influence me in all I think and do. I +can not solve to my satisfaction this problem--why two lives should be +wasted as ours have been. Courtney could have been happy with another +wife, or with no wife at all, perhaps; but, for Ethel and me, there +could be no happiness save in each other. But were she free to-day, the +separation that has already existed--long though it has been--would +only serve to render our future union more blissful and complete. We +have learned, by sad experience, the value of a love like ours, and we +should know how to give it its fullest and widest expression. But oh! +what a blank and chilly road lies before us now! + +I drove her back to her hotel; we hardly spoke all the way; my heart +was too full, and hers also, I think; though she did not know, as I +did, that it was our last interview. It must be our last! Heaven help +me to keep that resolution! + +Susie was not at all impressed by the pathos of the situation; she +babbled all the time, and thus, at all events, afforded us an excuse +for our silence. At parting, one incident occurred that may as well be +recorded. I had shaken hands with Ethel, speaking a few words of +farewell, and allowing her to infer that we might meet again on the +morrow; then I turned to Susie, and gave her the kiss which I would +have given the world to have had the right to press on her mother's +lips. Ethel saw, and, I think, understood. She stooped quickly down, +and laid her mouth where mine had been. Through the innocent medium of +the child, our hearts met; and then I saw her no more. + +_May 3d_.--Of course, it may not be true, probably it is not; mistakes +are so easily made in the first moments of such horror and confusion; +the dead come to life, and the living die. Or, at the worst, he may be +only wounded or disabled. At all events, I decline to believe, save +upon certain evidence, that the poor fellow has actually been killed. +Were it to turn out so, I should feel almost like a murderer; for was +not I writing, in this very journal, and perhaps at the very moment the +accident occurred, that if my wish could send him to another world, I +would not spare him? + +_Later_.--I have read all the accounts in the newspapers this morning, +and all agree in putting Courtney's name among the killed. There can be +no doubt about it any longer; he is dead. When the collision occurred, +the car in which he vas riding was thrown across the track, and the +other train crashed through it. Judging by the condition of the body +when discovered, death must have been nearly instantaneous. Poor +Courtney! My conscience is not at ease. Of course, I am not really +responsible; that is only imagination. But I begin to suspect that my +imagination has been playing me more than one trick lately. + +And now, with this new state of affairs so suddenly and terribly +brought about, what is to be done? I am as yet scarcely in a condition +to reflect calmly; but a voice within me seems to say that something +else besides my conscience has been awakened by Courtney's death. Can +it be that imagination, dallying with what it took for impossibilities, +could so far mislead a man? Well, I shall start at once for the scene +of the disaster, and relieve the poor fellow's widow of whatever pain I +can. Ethel Courtney a widow! Ah, Ethel! Death sheds a ghastly light +upon the idle vagaries of the human heart. + +_May 15th_.--_Denver_, _Colorado_.--Magnificent weather and scenery; +very different from my own mental scenery and mood at this moment. I am +sorely out of spirits; and no wonder, after the reckless and insane +emotion of the first days of this month. One pays for such indulgences +at my age. + +I have been re-reading the foregoing pages of this journal. Was I a +fool or a coward, or was I merely intoxicated for eight-and-forty +hours? At all events, Courtney's tragic end sobered me, and put what I +had been doing in a true light. I am glad my insanity was not permitted +to proceed farther than it did; but I have quite enough to reproach +myself with as it is. So far as I hare been able to explain the matter +to myself, my prime error lay in attributing, in a world subject to +constant change, too much permanence to a given state of affairs. The +fact that Ethel was the wife of another man seemed to me so fixed and +unalterable that I allowed my imagination to play with the picture of +what might happen if that unalterable fact were altered. Secure in this +fallacy, I worked myself up to the pitch of believing that I was +actually and passionately in love with a woman whose inaccessibility +was, after all, her most winning attraction. Moreover, by writing down, +in this journal, the events and words of the hours we spent together, I +confirmed myself in my false persuasion, and probably imported into the +record of what we said and did an amount of color and hidden +significance that never, as I am now convinced, belonged to it in +reality. Deluded by the notion that I was playing with a fancy, I was +suddenly aroused to find myself imbrued in facts. The whole episode has +profoundly humiliated me, and degraded me in my own esteem. + +But I am not at the bottom of the mystery yet. Was I not in love with +Ethel? Surely I was, if love be anything. Then why did I not ask her to +marry me? Would she have refused me? No. That last look she gave me +from under her black veil, when I told her I was going away.... Ah, no, +she would not have refused me. Then why did I hesitate? Was not such a +marriage precisely what I have always longed for? During all these +seven years have I not been bewailing my bachelorhood, and wishing for +an Ethel to cheer my solitary fireside with her gracious presence, to +be interested in my work and hopes, to interest me in her wifely and +maternal ways and aspirations? And when at last all these things were +offered me, why did I shrink back and reject them? + +Honestly, I can not explain it. Perhaps, if I had never loved her +before, I might have loved her this time enough to unite my fate with +hers. Or, perhaps--for I may as well speak plainly, since I am speaking +to myself--perhaps, by force of habit, I had grown to love, better than +love itself, those self-same forlorn conditions and dreary solitudes +which I was continually lamenting and praying to be delivered from. +What a dismal solution of the problem this would be were it the true +one! It amounts to saying that I prefer an empty room, a silent hearth, +an old pair of slippers, and a dressing-gown to the love and +companionship of a refined and beautiful woman!--that I love even my +own discomforts more than the comfort she would give me! It sounds +absurd, scandalous, impossible; and yet, if it be not the literal +truth, I know not what the truth is. It is amazing that an educated and +intelligent man can live to be forty years old and still have come to +no better an understanding of himself than I had. Verily, as my old +author said, thought is free, but nature is captive, and loveth her +chain. Yes, my old author was right. + + + + +MY FRIEND PATON. + + +Mathew Morriss, my father, was a cotton merchant in Liverpool +twenty-five years ago--a steady, laborious, clear-headed man, very +affectionate and genial in his private intercourse. He was wealthy, and +we lived in a sumptuous house in the upper part of the city. This was +when I was about ten years old. My father was twice married; I was the +child of the first wife, who died when I was very young; my stepmother +came five years later. She was the elder of two sisters, both beautiful +women. The sister often came to visit us. I remember I liked her better +than I liked my stepmother; in fact, I regarded her with that sort of +romantic attachment that often is developed in lads of my age. She had +golden brown hair and a remarkably sweet voice, and she sang and played +in a manner that transported me with delight; for I was already devoted +to music. She was of a gentle yet impulsive temperament, easily moved +to smiles and tears; she seemed to me the perfection of womankind, and +I made no secret of my determination to marry her when I grew up. She +used to caress me, and look at me in a dreamy way, and tell me I was +the nicest and handsomest boy in the world. "And as soon as you are a +year older than I am, John," she would say, "you shall marry me, if you +like." + +Another frequent visitor at our house at this time was not nearly so +much a favorite of mine. This was a German, Adolf Körner by name, who +had been a clerk in my father's concern for a number of years, and had +just been admitted junior partner. My father placed every confidence in +him, and often declared that he had the best idea of business he had +ever met with. This may very likely have been the fact; but to me he +appeared simply a tall, grave, taciturn man, of cold manners, speaking +with a slight German accent, which I disliked. I suppose he was about +thirty-seven years of age, but I always thought of him as older than my +father, who was fifty. Another and more valid reason for my disliking +Körner was that he was in the habit of paying a great deal of attention +to my ladylove, Miss Juliet Tretherne. I used to upbraid Juliet about +encouraging his advances, and I expressed my opinion of him in the +plainest language, at which she would smile in a preoccupied wav, and +would sometimes draw me to her and kiss me on the forehead. Once she +said, "Mr. Körner is a very noble gentleman; you must not dislike him." +This had the effect of making me hate him all the more. + +One day I noticed an unusual commotion in the house, and Juliet came +down-stairs attired in a lovely white dress, with a long veil, and +fragrant flowers in her hair. She got into a carriage with my father +and stepmother, and drove away. I did not understand what it meant, and +no one told me. After they were gone I went into the drawing-room, and, +greatly to my surprise, saw there a long table covered with a white +cloth and laid out with a profusion of good things to eat and drink in +sparkling dishes and decanters. In the middle of the table was a great +cake covered with white frosting; the butler was arranging some flowers +round it. + +"What is that cake for, Curtis?" I asked. + +"For the bride, to be sure," said Curtis, without looking up. + +"The bride! who is she?" I demanded in astonishment. + +"Your aunt Juliet, to be sure!" said Curtis, composedly, stepping back +and contemplating his floral arrangement with his head on one side. + +I asked no more, but betook myself with all speed to my room, locked +the door, flung myself on the bed, and cried to heartbreaking with +grief, indignation, and mortification. After a very long time some one +tried the door, and a voice--the voice of Juliet--called to me. I made +no answer. She began to plead with me; I resisted as long as I could, +but finally my affection got the better of my resentment, and I arose +and opened the door, hiding my tear-stained face behind my arm. Juliet +caught me in her arms and kissed me; tears were running down her own +cheeks. How lovely she looked! My heart melted, and I was just on the +point of forgiving her when the voice of Körner became audible from +below, calling out "Mrs. Körner!" I tore myself away from her, and +cried passionately, "You don't love me! you love him! go to him!" She +looked at me for a moment with a pained expression; then she put her +hand in the pocket of her dress and drew out something done up in white +paper. "See what I have brought you, you unkind boy," said she. "What +is it?" I demanded. "A piece of my wedding-cake," she replied. "Give it +me!" said I. She put it in my hand; I ran forward to the head of the +stairs, which Körner was just ascending, dashed the cake in his face, +and then rushed back to my own room, whence neither threats nor coaxing +availed to draw me forth for the rest of the day. + +I never saw Juliet again. She and her husband departed on their +wedding-trip that afternoon; it was to take them as far as Germany, for +Körner said that he wished to visit his father and mother, who were +still alive, before settling down permanently in Liverpool. Whether +they really did so was never discovered. But, about a fortnight later, +a dreadful fact came to light. Körner--the grave and reticent Körner, +whom everybody trusted and thought so highly of--was a thief, and he +had gone off with more than half my father's property in his pocket. +The blow almost destroyed my father, and my stepmother, too, for that +matter, for at first it seemed as though Juliet must have been privy to +the crime. This, however, turned out not to have been the case. Her +fate must have been all the more terrible on that account; but no news +of either of them ever came back to us, and my father would never take +any measures to bring Körner to justice. It was several months before +he recovered from the shock sufficiently to take up business again; and +then the American Civil War came and completed his ruin. He died, a +poor and broken-down man, a year later. My stepmother, who was really +an admirable woman, realized whatever property remained to us, took a +small house, and sent me to an excellent school, where I was educated +for Cambridge. Meanwhile I had been devoting all possible time to +music; for I had determined to become a composer, and I was looking +forward, after taking my degree, to completing my musical education +abroad; but my mother's health was precarious, and, when the time came, +she found herself unequal to making the journey, and the change of +habits and surroundings that it implied. We lived very quietly in +Liverpool for three or four years; then she died, and, after I had +settled our affairs, I found myself in possession of a small income and +alone in the world. Without loss of time I set out for the Continent. + +I went to a German city, where the best musical training was to be had, +and made my arrangements to pass several years there. At the banker's, +when I went to provide for the regular receipt of my remittances, I met +a young American, by name Paton Jeffries. He was from New England, and, +I think, a native of the State of Connecticut; his father, he told me, +was a distinguished inventor, who had made and lost a considerable +fortune in devising a means of promoting sleep by electricity. Paton +was studying to be an architect, which, he said, was the coming +profession in his country; and it was evident, on a short acquaintance, +that he was a fellow of unusual talents--one of those men of whom you +say that, come what may, they are always sure to fall on their feet. +For my part, I have certainly never met with so active and versatile a +spirit. He was a year or so older than I, rather tall than short, +lightly but strongly built, with a keen, smiling, subtle face, a +finely-developed forehead, light wavy hair, and gray eyes, very +penetrating and bright. There was a pleasing kind of eagerness and +volubility in his manner of talking, and a slight imperfection, not +amounting to a lisp, in his utterance, which imparted a naive charm to +his speech. He used expressive and rapid gestures with his hands and +arms, and there was a magnetism, a fascination, about the whole man +that strongly impressed me. I was at that period much more susceptible +of impressions, and prone to yield to them, than I am now. Paton's +rattling vivacity, his knowledge of the world, his entertaining talk +and stories, his curiosity, enterprise, and audacity, took me by storm; +he was my opposite in temperament and character, and it seemed to me +that he had most of the advantages on his side. Nevertheless, he +professed, and I still believe he felt, a great liking for me, and we +speedily came to an agreement to seek a lodging together. On the second +day of our search, we found just what we wanted. + +It was an old house, on the outskirts of the town, standing by itself, +with a small garden behind it. It had formerly been occupied by an +Austrian baron, and it was probably not less than two hundred years +old. The baron's family had died out, or been dispersed, and now the +venerable edifice was let, in the German fashion, in separate floors or +_étages_, communicating with a central staircase. Some alterations +rendered necessary by this modification had been made, but +substantially the house was unchanged. Our apartment comprised four or +five rooms on the left of the landing and at the top of the house, +which consisted of three stories. The chief room was the parlor, which +looked down through a square bow-window on the street. This room was of +irregular shape, one end being narrower than the other, and nearly +fitting the space at this end was a kind of projecting shelf or +mantelpiece (only, of course, there was no fireplace under it, open +fireplaces being unknown in Germany), upon which rested an old cracked +looking-glass, made in two compartments, the frame of which, black with +age and fly-spots, was fastened against the wall. The shelf was +supported by two pilasters; but the object of the whole structure was a +mystery; so far as appeared, it served no purpose but to support the +looking-glass, which might just as well have been suspended from a nail +in the wall. Paton, I remember, betrayed a great deal of curiosity +about it; and since the consideration of the problem was more in his +line of business than in mine, I left it to him. At the opposite end of +the room stood a tall earthenware stove. The walls were wainscoted five +feet up from the dark polished floor, and were hung with several smoky +old paintings, of no great artistic value. The chairs and tables were +plain, but very heavy and solid, and of a dark hue like the room. The +window was nearly as wide as it was high, and opened laterally from the +center on hinges. The other rooms were of the same general appearance, +but smaller. We both liked the place, and soon made ourselves very +comfortable in it. I hired a piano, and had it conveyed upstairs to the +parlor; while Paton disposed his architectural paraphernalia on and in +the massive writing-table near the window. Our cooking and other +household duties were done for us by the wife of the _portier_, the +official corresponding to the French _concierge_, who, in all German +houses, attends at the common door, and who, in this case, lived in a +couple of musty little closets opening into the lower hall, and eked +out his official salary by cobbling shoes. He was an odd, grotesque +humorist, of most ungainly exterior, black haired and bearded, with a +squint, a squab nose, and a short but very powerful figure. Dirty he +was beyond belief, and he was abominably fragrant of vile tobacco. For +my part, I could not endure this fellow; but Paton, who had much more +of what he called human nature in him than I had, established friendly +relations with him at once, and reported that he found him very +amusing. It was characteristic of Paton that, though he knew much less +about the German language than I did, he could understand and make +himself understood in it much better; and, when we were in company, it +was always he who did the talking. + +It would never have occurred to me to wonder, much less to inquire, who +might be the occupants of the other _étages_; but Paton was more +enterprising, and before we had been settled three days in our new +quarters, he had gathered from his friend the portier, and from other +sources, all the obtainable information on the subject. The information +was of no particular interest, however, except as regarded the persons +who dwelt on the floor immediately below us. They were two--an old man +and a young woman, supposed to be his daughter. They had been living +here several years--from before the time, indeed, that the portier had +occupied his present position. In all these years the old man was known +to have been out of his room only twice. He was certainly an eccentric +person, and was said to be a miser and extremely wealthy. The portier +further averred that his property--except such small portion of it as +was invested and on the income of which he lived--was realized in the +form of diamonds and other precious stones, which, for greater +security, he always carried, waking or sleeping, in a small leathern +bag, fastened round his neck by a fine steel chain. His daughter was +scarcely less a mystery than he, for, though she went out as often as +twice or thrice a week, she was always closely veiled, and her figure +was so disguised by the long cloak she wore that it was impossible to +say whether she were graceful or deformed, beautiful or ugly. The +balance of belief, however, was against her being attractive in any +respect. The name by which the old miser was known was Kragendorf; but, +as the portier sagaciously remarked, there was no knowing, in such +cases, whether the name a man bore was his own or somebody's else. + +This Kragendorf mystery was another source of apparently inexhaustible +interest to Paton, who was fertile in suggestions as to how it might be +explained or penetrated. I believe he and the portier talked it over at +great length, but, so far as I am aware, without arriving at any +solution. I took little heed of the matter, being now fully absorbed in +my studies; and it is to be hoped that Herr Kragendorf was not of a +nervous temperament, otherwise he must have inveighed profanely against +the constant piano-practice that went on over his head. I also had a +violin, on which I flattered myself I could perform with a good deal of +expression, and by and by, in the long, still evenings--it was +November, but the temperature was still mild--I got into the habit of +strolling along the less frequented streets, with my violin under my +shoulder, drawing from it whatever music my heart desired. Occasionally +I would pause at some convenient spot, lean against a wall, and give +myself up to improvisation. At such times a little cluster of auditors +would gradually collect in front of me, listening for the most part +silently, or occasionally giving vent to low grunts and interjections +of approval. One evening, I remember, a young woman joined the group, +though keeping somewhat in the background; she listened intently, and +after a time gradually turned her face toward me, unconsciously as it +were; and the light of a street-lamp at a little distance revealed a +countenance youthful, pale, sad, and exquisitely beautiful. It +impressed me as with a vague reminiscence of something I had seen or +imagined--some pictured face, perhaps, caught in a glance and never to +be identified. Her eyes finally met mine; I stopped playing. She +started, gave me an alarmed look, and, gliding swiftly away, +disappeared. I could not forget this incident; it haunted me strangely +and persistently. Many a time thereafter I revisited the same spot, and +drew together other audiences, but the delicate girl with the dark-blue +eyes and the tender, sensitive mouth, was never again among them. + +It was at this epoch, I think, that the inexhaustible Paton made a +discovery. From my point of view it was not a discovery of any moment; +but, as usual, he took interest in it enough for both of us. It +appeared that, in attempting to doctor the crack in the old +looking-glass, a large piece of the plate had got loose, and come away +in his hands; and in the space behind he had detected a paper, +carefully folded and tied up with a piece of faded ribbon. Paton was +never in the habit of hampering himself with fine-drawn scruples, and +he had no hesitation in opening the folded paper and spreading it out +on the table. Judging from the glance I gave it, it seemed to be a +confused and abstruse mixture of irregular geometrical figures and +cramped German chirography. But Paton set to work upon it with as much +concentration as if it had been a recipe for the Philosopher's Stone; +he reproduced the lines and angles on fresh paper, and labored over the +writing with a magnifying-glass and a dictionary. At times he would +mutter indistinctly to himself, lift his eyebrows, nod or shake his +head, bite his lips, and rub his forehead, and anon fall to work again +with fresh vigor. At last he leaned back in his chair, thumped his hand +on the table, and laughed. + +"Got it!" he exclaimed. "Say, John, old boy, I've got it! and it's the +most curious old thing ever you saw in your life!" + +"Something in analytical geometry, isn't it?" said I, turning round on +my piano-stool. + +"Analytical pudding's end! It's a plan of a house, my boy, and, what's +more, of this very house we're in! That's a find, and no mistake! These +are the descriptions and explanations--these bits of writing. It's a +perfect labyrinth of Crete! Udolpho was nothing to it!" + +"Well, I suppose it isn't of much value except as a curiosity?" + +"Don't be too sure of that, John, my boy! Who knows but there's a +treasure concealed somewhere in this house? or a skeleton in a secret +chamber! This old paper may make our fortune yet!" + +"The treasure wouldn't belong to us if we found it; and, besides, we +can't make explorations beyond our own premises, and we know what's in +them already." + +"Do we? Did we know what was behind the looking-glass? Did you never +hear of sliding panels, and private passages, and concealed staircases? +Where's your imagination, man? But you don't need imagination--here it +is in black and white!" + +As he spoke, he pointed to a part of the plan; but, as I was stooping +to examine it, he seemed to change his mind. + +"No matter," he exclaimed, suddenly folding up the paper and rising +from his chair. "You're not an architect, and you can't be expected to +go in for these things. No; there's no practical use in it, of course. +But secret passages were always a hobby of mine. Well, what are you +going to do this evening? Come over to the café and have a game of +billiards!" + +"No; I shall go to bed early to-night." + +"You sleep too much," said Paton. "Everybody does, if my father, +instead of inventing a way of promoting sleep, had invented a way of +doing without it, he'd have been the richest man in America to-day. +However, do as you like. I sha'n't be back till late." + +He put on his hat and sallied forth with a cigar in his mouth. Paton +was of rather a convivial turn; he liked to have a good time, as he +called it; and, indeed, he seemed to think that the chief end of man +was to get money enough to have a good time continually, a sort of good +eternity. His head was strong, and he could stand a great deal of +liquor; and I have seen him sip and savor a glass of raw brandy or +whisky as another man would a glass of Madeira. In this, and the other +phases of his life about town, I had no participation, being +constitutionally as well as by training averse therefrom; and he, on +the other hand, would never have listened to my sage advice to modify +his loose habits. Our companionship was apart from these things; and, +as I have said, I found in him a good deal that I could sympathize +with, without approaching the moralities. + +That night, after I had been for some time asleep, I awoke and found +myself listening to a scratching and shoving noise that seemed quite +unaccountable. By-and-by it made me uneasy. I got up and went toward +the parlor, from which the noise proceeded. On reaching the doorway, I +saw Paton on his knees before one of the pilasters in the narrow end of +the room; a candle was on the floor beside him, and he was busily at +work at something, though what it was I could not make out. The creak +of the threshold under my foot caused him to look round. He started +violently, and sprang to his feet. + +"Oh! it's you, is it?" he said, after a moment. "Great Scott! how you +scared me! I was--I dropped a bit of money hereabouts, and I was +scraping about to find it. No matter--it wasn't much! Sorry I disturbed +you, old boy." And, laughing, he picked up his candle and went into his +own room. + +From this time there was a change vaguely perceptible in our mutual +relations; we chatted together less than before, and did not see so +much of each other. Paton was apt to be out when I was at home, and +generally sat up after I was abed. He seemed to be busy about +something--something connected with his profession, I judged; but, +contrary to his former custom, he made no attempt to interest me in it. +To tell the truth, I had begun to realize that our different tastes and +pursuits must lead us further and further apart, and that our +separation could be only a question of time. Paton was a materialist, +and inclined to challenge all the laws and convictions that mankind has +instituted and adopted; there was no limit to his radicalism. For +example, on coming in one day, I found him with a curious antique +poniard in his hands, which he had probably bought in some old +curiosity shop. At first I fancied he meant to conceal it; but, if so, +he changed his mind. + +"What do you think of that?" he said, holding it out to me. "There's a +solution of continuity for you! Mind you don't prick yourself! It's +poisoned up to the hilt!" + +"What do you want of such a thing?" I asked. + +"Well, killing began with Cain, and isn't likely to go out of fashion +in our day. I might find it convenient to give one of my friends--you, +for instance--a reminder of his mortality some time. You'll say murder +is immoral. Bless you, man, we never could do without it! No man dies +before his time, and some one dies every day that some one else may +live." + +This was said in a jocose way, and, of course, Paton did not mean it. +But it affected me unpleasantly nevertheless. + +As I was washing my hands in my room, I happened to look out of my +window, which commanded a view of the garden at the back of the house. +It was an hour after sunset, and the garden was nearly dark; but I +caught a movement of something below, and, looking more closely, I +recognized the ugly figure of the portier. He seemed to be tying +something to the end of a long slender pole, like a gigantic +fishing-rod; and presently he advanced beneath my window, and raised +the pole as high as it would go against the wall of the house. The +point he touched was the sill of the window below mine--probably that +of the bedroom of Herr Kragendorf. At this juncture the portier seemed +to be startled at something--possibly he saw me at my window; at all +events, he lowered his pole and disappeared in the house. + +The next day Paton made an announcement that took me by surprise. He +said he had made up his mind to quit Germany, and that very shortly. He +mentioned having received letters from home, and declared he had got, +or should soon have got, all he wanted out of this country. "I'm going +to stop paying money for instruction," he said, "and begin to earn it +by work. I shall stay another week, but then I'm off. Too slow here for +me! I want to be in the midst of things, using my time." + +I did not attempt to dissuade him; in fact, my first feeling was rather +one of relief; and this Paton, with his quick preceptions, was probably +aware of. + +"Own up, old boy!" he said, laughing; "you'll be able to endure my +absence. And yet you needn't think of me as worse than anybody else. If +everybody were musicians and moralists, it would be nice, no doubt; but +one might get tired of it in time, and then what would you do? You must +give the scamps and adventurers their innings, after all! They may not +do much good, but they give the other fellows occupation. I was born +without my leave being asked, and I may act as suits me without asking +anybody's leave." + +This was said on a certain bright morning after our first fall of snow; +the tiled roofs of the houses were whitened with it, it cushioned the +window-sills, and spread a sparkling blankness over the garden. In the +streets it was already melting, and people were slipping and splashing +on the wet and glistening pavements. After gazing out at this scene for +a while, in a mood of unwonted thoughtfulness, Paton yawned, stretched +himself, and declared his intention of taking a stroll before dinner. +Accordingly he lit a cigar and went forth. I watched him go down the +street and turn the corner. + +An hour afterward, just when dinner was on the table, I heard an +unusual noise and shuffling on the stairs, and a heavy knock on the +door. I opened it, and saw four men bearing on a pallet the form of my +friend Paton. A police officer accompanied them. They brought Paton in, +and laid him on his bed. The officer told me briefly what had happened, +gave me certain directions, and, saying that a surgeon would arrive +immediately, he departed with the four men tramping behind him. + +Paton had slipped in going across the street, and a tramway car had run +over him. He was not dead, though almost speechless; but his injuries +were such that it was impossible that he should recover. He kept his +eyes upon me; they were as bright as ever, though his face was deadly +pale. He seemed to be trying to read my thoughts--to find out my +feeling about him, and my opinion of his condition. I was terribly +shocked and grieved, and my face no doubt showed it. By-and-by I saw +his lips move, and bent down to listen. + +"Confounded nuisance!" he whispered faintly in my car. "It's all right, +though; I'm not going to die this time. I've got something to do, and +I'm going to do it--devil take me if I don't!" + +He was unable to say more, and soon after the surgeon came in. He made +an examination, and it was evident that he had no hope. His shrug of +the shoulders was not lost upon Paton, who frowned, and made a defiant +movement of the lip. But presently he said to me, still in the same +whisper, "John, if that old fool should be right--he won't be, but in +case of accidents--you must take charge of my things--the papers, and +all. I'll make you heir of my expectations! Write out a declaration to +that effect: I can sign my name; and he'll be witness." + +I did as he directed, and having explained to the surgeon the nature of +the document, I put the pen in Paton's hand; but was obliged to guide +his hand with my own in order to make an intelligible signature. The +surgeon signed below, and Paton seemed satisfied. He closed his eyes; +his sufferings appeared to be very slight. But, even while I was +looking at him, a change came over his face--a deadly change. His eyes +opened; they were no longer bright, but sunken and dull. He gave me a +dusky look--whether of rage, of fear, or of entreaty, I could not tell. +His lips parted, and a voice made itself audible; not like his own +voice, but husky and discordant. "I'm going," it said. "But look out +for me.... Do it yourself!" + +"Der Herr ist todt" (the man is dead), said the surgeon the next minute. + +It was true. Paton had gone out of this life at an hour's warning. What +purpose or desire his last words indicated, there was nothing to show. +He was dead; and yet I could hardly believe that it was so. He had been +so much alive; so full of schemes and enterprises. Nothing now was left +but that crushed and haggard figure, stiffening on the bed; nothing, at +least, that mortal senses could take cognizance of. It was a strange +thought. + +Paton's funeral took place a few days afterward. I returned from the +graveyard weary in body and mind. At the door of the house stood the +portier, who nodded to me, and said, + +"A very sad thing to happen, worthy sir; but so it is in the world. Of +all the occupants of this house, one would have said the one least +likely to be dead to-day was Herr Jeffries. Heh! if I had been the good +Providence, I would have made away with the old gentleman of the +_étage_ below, who is of no use to anybody." + +This, for lack of a better, was Paton's funeral oration. I climbed the +three flights of stairs and let myself into our apartment--mine +exclusively now. The place was terribly lonely; much more so than if +Paton had been alive anywhere in the world. But he was dead; and, if +his own philosophy were true, he was annihilated. But it was not true! +How distinct and minute was my recollection of him--his look, his +gestures, the tones of his voice. I could almost see him before me; my +memory of him dead seemed clearer than when he was alive. In that +invisible world of the mind was he not living still, and perhaps not +far away. + +I sat down at the table where he had been wont to work, and unlocked +the drawers in which he kept his papers. These, or some of them, I took +out and spread before me. But I found it impossible, as yet, to +concentrate my attention upon them; I pushed back my chair, and, +rising, went to the piano. Here I remained for perhaps a couple of +hours, striking the vague chords that echo wandering thoughts. I was +trying to banish this haunting image of Paton from my mind, and at +length I partly succeeded. + +All at once, however, the impression of him (as I may call it) came +back with a force and vividness that startled me. I stopped playing, +and sat for a minute perfectly still. I felt that Paton was in the +room; that if I looked round I should see him. I however restrained +myself from looking round with all the strength of my will--wherefore I +know not. What I felt was not fear, but the conviction that I was on +the brink of a fearful and unprecedented experience--an experience that +would not leave me as it found me. This strange struggle with myself +taxed all my powers; the sweat started out on my forehead. At last the +moment came when I could struggle no longer. I laid my hand on the +keyboard, and pushed myself round on the stool. There was a momentary +dazzle before my eyes, and after that I saw plainly. My hand, striking +the keys, had produced a jarring discord; and while this was yet +tingling in my ears, Paton, who was sitting in his old place at the +table, with his back toward me, faced about in his chair, and his eyes +met mine. I thought he smiled. + +My excitement was past, and was succeeded by a dead calm. I examined +him critically. His appearance was much the same as when in life; nay, +he was even more like himself than before. The subtle or crafty +expression which had always been discernible in his features was now +intensified, and there was something wild and covertly fierce in the +shining of his gray eyes, something that his smile was unable to +disguise. What was human and genial in my former friend had passed +away, and what remained was evil--the kind of evil that I now perceived +to have been at the base of his nature. It was a revelation of +character terrible in its naked completeness. I knew at a glance that +Paton must always have been a far more wicked man that I had ever +imagined; and in his present state all the remains of goodness had been +stripped away, and nothing but wickedness was left. + +I felt impelled, by an impulse for which I could not account, to +approach the table and examine the papers once more; and now it entered +into my mind to perceive a certain method and meaning in them that had +been hidden from me before. It was as though I were looking at them +through Paton's intelligence, and with his memory. He had in some way +ceased to be visible to me; but I became aware that he wished me to sit +down in his chair, and I did so. Under his guidance, and in obedience +to a will that seemed to be my own, and yet was in direct opposition to +my real will, I began a systematic study of the papers. Paton, +meanwhile, remained close to me, though I could no longer see him; but +I felt the gaze of his fierce, shining eyes, and his crafty, evil +smile. I soon obtained a tolerable insight into what the papers meant, +and what was the scheme in which Paton had been so much absorbed at the +time of his death, and which he had been so loath to abandon. + +It was a wicked and cruel scheme, worked out to the smallest +particular. But, though I understood its hideousness intellectually, it +aroused in mo no corresponding emotion; my sensitiveness to right arid +wrong seemed stupefied or inoperative. I could say, "This is wicked," +but I could not awaken in myself a horror of committing the wickedness; +and, moreover, I knew that, if the influence Paton was able to exercise +over me continued, I must in due time commit it. + +Presently I became aware, or, to speak more accurately, I seemed to +remember, that there was something in Paton's room which it was +incumbent on me to procure. I went thither, lifted up a corner of the +rag between the bed and the stove, and beheld, in an aperture in the +floor, of the existence of which I had till now known nothing, the +antique poisoned dagger that Paton had showed me a few weeks before, +and which I had not seen since then. I brought it back to the +sitting-room, put it in a drawer of the table, and locked the drawer, +at the same time making a mental note to the effect that I should +reopen the drawer at a certain hour of the night and take the dagger +out. All this while Paton was close at hand, though not visible to +sight; but I had a sort of inner perception of his presence and +movements. All at once, at about the hour of sunset, I saw him again; +he moved toward the looking-glass at the narrow end of the room, laid +his hand upon one of the pilasters, glanced at me over his shoulder, +and immediately seemed to stoop down. As I sat, the edge of the table +hid him from sight. I stood up and looked across. He was not there; and +a kind of reaction of my nerves informed me that he was gone +absolutely, for the time. + +This reaction produced a lassitude impossible to describe; it was +overpowering, and I had no choice but to yield to it. I dropped back in +my chair, leaned forward on the table, and instantly fell into a heavy +sleep, or stupor. + +I awoke abruptly, with a sensation as if a hand had been laid on my +shoulder. It was night, and I knew that the hour I had noted in my mind +was at hand. I opened the drawer and took out the dagger, which I put +in my pocket. The house was quite silent. A shiver passed through me. I +was aware that Paton was standing at the narrow end of the room, +waiting for me: Yes--there he was, or the impression of him in my +brain--what did it matter? I arose mechanically and walked toward him. +He had no need to direct me: I knew all there was to do, and how to do +it. I knelt on the floor, laid my shoulder against the pilaster, and +pushed it laterally. It moved aside on a pivot, disclosing an iron ring +let into the floor. I laid hold of this ring, and lifted. A section of +the floor came up, and I saw a sort of ladder descending +perpendicularly into darkness. Down the ladder Paton went, and I +followed him. Arrived at the bottom, I turned to the left, led by an +instinct or a fascination; passed along a passage barely wide enough to +admit me, until I came against a smooth, hard surface. I passed my hand +over it until I touched a knob or catch, which I pressed, and the +surface gave way before me like a door. I stumbled forward, and found +myself in a room of what was doubtless Herr Kragendorf's apartment. A +keen, cold air smote against my face; and with it came a sudden influx +of strength and self-possession. I felt that, for a moment at least, +the fatal influence of Paton upon me was broken. But what was that +sound of a struggle--those cries and gasps, that seemed to come from an +adjoining room? + +I sprang forward, opened a door, and beheld a tall old man, with white +hair and beard, in the grasp of a ruffian whom I at once recognized as +the portier. A broken window showed how he had effected his entrance. +One hand held the old man by the throat; in the other was a knife, +which he was prevented from using by a young woman, who had flung +herself upon him in such a way as to trammel his movements. In another +moment, however, he would have shaken her off. + +But that moment was not allowed him. I seized him with a strength that +amazed myself--a strength which never came upon me before or since. The +conflict lasted but a breath or two; I hurled him to the floor, and, as +he fell, his right arm was doubled under him, and the knife which he +held entered his back beneath the left shoulder-blade. When I rose up +from the whirl and fury of the struggle, I saw the old man reclining +exhausted on the bosom of the girl. I knew him, despite his white hair +and beard. And the face that bent so lovingly above him was the face +that had looked into mine that night on the street--the face of the +blue-eyed maiden--of a younger and a lovelier Juliet! As I gazed, there +came a thundering summons at the door, and the police entered. + + * * * * * + +My poor uncle Körner had not prospered after his great stroke of +roguery. His wife had died of a broken heart, after giving birth to a +daughter, and his stolen riches had vanished almost as rapidly as they +were acquired. He had at last settled down with his daughter in this +old house. The treasure in the leathern bag, though a treasure to him, +was not of a nature to excite general cupidity. It consisted, not of +precious stones, but of relics of his dead wife--her rings, a lock of +her hair, her letters, a miniature of her in a gold case. These poor +keepsakes, and his daughter, had been the only solace of his lonely and +remorseful life. + +It was uncertain whether Paton and the portier had planned the robbery +together, or separately, and in ignorance of each other's purpose. Nor +can I tell whether my disembodied visitor came to me with good or with +evil intent. Wicked spirits, even when they seem to have power to carry +out their purposes, are perhaps only permitted to do so, so far as is +consistent with an overruling good of which they know nothing. +Certainly, if I had not descended the secret passage, Körner would have +been killed, and perhaps my Juliet likewise--the mother of my children. +But should I have been led on to stab him myself, with the poisoned +dagger, had the portier not been there? Juliet smiles and says No, and +I am glad to agree with her. But I have never since then found that +anniversary upon me, without a shudder of awe, and a dark thought of +Paton Jeffries. + + + + +THE END. + + + + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of David Poindexter's Disappearance and +Other Tales, by Julian Hawthorne + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE *** + +***** This file should be named 7057-8.txt or 7057-8.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/7/0/5/7057/ + +Produced by Michelle Shephard, Eric Eldred, Charles Franks +and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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Hart was the originator of the Project Gutenberg-tm +concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared +with anyone. For forty years, he produced and distributed Project +Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support. + +Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed +editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the U.S. +unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not necessarily +keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition. + +Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search facility: + + www.gutenberg.org + +This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, +including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary +Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to +subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. diff --git a/7057-8.zip b/7057-8.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..dd14277 --- /dev/null +++ b/7057-8.zip diff --git a/7057.txt b/7057.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..630bf24 --- /dev/null +++ b/7057.txt @@ -0,0 +1,4488 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of David Poindexter's Disappearance and Other +Tales, by Julian Hawthorne + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: David Poindexter's Disappearance and Other Tales + +Author: Julian Hawthorne + +Posting Date: October 7, 2012 [EBook #7057] +Release Date: December, 2004 +First Posted: March 3, 2003 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE *** + + + + +Produced by Michelle Shephard, Eric Eldred, Charles Franks +and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team + + + + + + + + + + + +DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE _AND OTHER TALES_ + +BY JULIAN HAWTHORNE + + + + +CONTENTS. + + + DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE + KEN'S MYSTERY + "WHEN HALF-GODS GO, THE GODS ARRIVE" + "SET NOT THY FOOT ON GRAVES" + MY FRIEND PATON + + + + +DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE. + + +Among the records of the English state trials are to be found many +strange stories, which would, as the phrase is, make the fortune of a +modern novelist. But there are also numerous cases, not less +stimulating to imagination and curiosity, which never attained more +than local notoriety, of which the law was able to take but +comparatively small cognizance, although they became subjects of much +unofficial discussion and mystification. Among these cases none, +perhaps, is better worth recalling than that of David Poindexter. It +will be my aim here to tell the tale as simply and briefly as +possible--to repeat it, indeed, very much as it came to my ears while +living, several years ago, near the scene in which its events took +place. There is a temptation to amplify it, and to give it a more +recent date and a different setting; but (other considerations aside) +the story might lose in force and weight more than it would thereby +gain in artistic balance and smoothness. + +David Poindexter was a younger son of an old and respected family in +Sussex, England. He was born in London in 1785. He was educated at +Oxford, with a view to his entering the clerical profession, and in the +year 1810 he obtained a living in the little town of Witton, near +Twickenham, known historically as the home of Sir John Suckling. The +Poindexters had been much impoverished by the excesses of David's +father and grandfather, and David seems to have had few or no resources +beyond the very modest stipend appertaining to his position. He was, at +all events, poor, though possessed of capacities which bade fair to +open to him some of the higher prizes of his calling; but, on the other +hand, there is evidence that he chafed at his poverty, and reason to +believe that he had inherited no small share of the ill-regulated +temperament which had proved so detrimental to the elder generations of +his family. + +Personally he was a man of striking aspect, having long, dark hair, +heavily-marked eyebrows, and blue eyes; his mouth and chin were +graceful in contour, but wanting in resolution; his figure was tall, +well knit, and slender. He was an eloquent preacher, and capable, when +warmed by his subject, of powerfully affecting the emotions of his +congregation. He was a great favorite with women--whom, however, he +uniformly treated with coldness--and by no means unpopular with men, +toward some of whom he manifested much less reserve. Nevertheless, +before the close of the second year of his incumbency he was known to +be paying his addresses to a young lady of the neighborhood, Miss Edith +Saltine, the only child of an ex-army officer. The colonel was a +widower, and in poor health, and since he was living mainly on his +half-pay, and had very little to give his daughter, the affair was +looked upon as a love match, the rather since Edith was a handsome +young woman of charming character. The Reverend David Poindexter +certainly had every appearance of being deeply in love; and it is often +seen that the passions of reserved men, when once aroused, are stronger +than those of persons more generally demonstrative. + +Colonel Saltine did not at first receive his proposed son-in-law with +favor. He was a valetudinarian, and accustomed to regard his daughter +as his nurse by right, and he resented the idea of her leaving him +forlorn for the sake of a good-looking parson. It is very likely that +his objections might have had the effect of breaking off the match, for +his daughter was devotedly attached to him, and hardly questioned his +right to dispose of her as he saw fit; but after a while the worthy +gentleman seems to have thought better of his contrariness. Poindexter +had strong persuasive powers, and no doubt made himself personally +agreeable to the colonel, and, moreover, it was arranged that the +latter should occupy the same house with Mr. and Mrs. Poindexter after +they were married. Nevertheless, the colonel was not a man to move +rapidly, and the engagement had worn along for nearly a year without +the wedding-day having been fixed. One winter evening in the early part +of December, Poindexter dined with the colonel and Edith, and as the +gentlemen were sitting over their wine the lover spoke on the topic +that was uppermost in his thoughts, and asked his host whether there +was any good reason why the marriage should not be consummated at once. + +"Christmas is at hand," the young man remarked; "why should it not be +rendered doubly memorable by granting this great boon?" + +"For a parson, David, you are a deuced impatient man," the colonel said. + +"Parsons are human," the other exclaimed with warmth. + +"Humph! I suppose some of them are. In fact, David, if I didn't believe +that there was something more in you than texts and litanies and the +Athanasian creed, I'll be hanged if I'd ever have let you look twice at +Edith. That girl has got blood in her veins, David; she's not to be +thrown away on any lantern-jawed, white-livered doctor of souls, I can +tell you." + +David held his head down, and seemed not to intend a reply; but he +suddenly raised his eyes, and fixed them upon the colonel's. "You know +what my father was," he said, in a low, distinct voice; "I am my +father's son." + +"That idea has occurred to me more than once, David, and to say the +truth, I've liked you none the less for it. But, then, what the deuce +should a fellow like you want to do in a pulpit? I respect the cloth as +much as any man, I hope, but leaving theory aside, and coming down to +practice, aren't there fools and knaves enough in the world to carry on +that business, without a fellow of heart and spirit like you going into +it?" + +"Theory or no theory, there have been as great men in the pulpit as in +any other position," said David, gloomily. + +"I don't say to the contrary: ecclesiastical history, and all that: but +what I do say is, if a man is great in the pulpit, it's a pity he isn't +somewhere else, where he could use his greatness to more advantage." + +"Well," remarked David, in the same somber tone, "I am not contented: +so much I can admit to the father of the woman I love. But you know as +well as I do that men nowadays are called to my profession not so much +by the Divine summons as by the accident of birth. Were it not for the +law of primogeniture, Colonel Saltine, the Church of England would be, +for the most part, a congregation without a clergyman." + +"Gad! I'm much of your opinion," returned the colonel, with a grin; +"but there are two doors, you know, for a second son to enter the world +by. If he doesn't fancy a cassock, he can put on His Majesty's uniform." + +"Neither the discipline nor the activity of a soldier's life would suit +me," David answered. "So far as I know my own nature, what it craves is +freedom, and the enjoyment of its capacities. Only under such +conditions could I show what I am capable of. In other words," he +added, with a short laugh, "ten thousand a year is the profession I +should choose." + +"Ah," murmured the colonel, heaving a sigh, "I doubt that's a +profession we'd all of us like to practice as well as preach. What! no +more wine? Oh, ay, Edith, of course! Well, go to her, sir, if you must; +but when you come to my age you'll have found out which wears the +best--woman or the bottle. I'll join you presently, and maybe we'll see +what can be done about this marrying business." + +So David went to Edith, and they had a clear hour together before they +heard the colonel's slippered tread hobbling through the hall. Just +before he opened the door, David had said: "I sometimes doubt whether +you wholly love me, after all." And she had answered: + +"If I do not, it is because I sometimes feel as if you were not your +real self." + +The colonel heard nothing of this odd bit of dialogue; but when he had +subsided, with his usual grunt, into his arm-chair beside the +fire-place, and Edith had brought him his foot-stool and his pipe, and +pat the velvet skull cap on his bald pate, he drew a long whiff of +tobacco smoke, and said: + +"If you young folks want to set up housekeeping a month from to-day, +you can do it, for all I care." + +Little did any one of the three suspect what that month was destined to +bring forth. + +David Poindexter's father had been married twice, his second wife dying +within a year of her wedding-day, and two weeks after bringing David +into the world. This lady, whose maiden name was Lambert, had a brother +who was a gentleman farmer, and a tolerably successful one. His farm +was situated in the parish of Witton, and he owned a handsome house on +the outskirts of the town itself. He and David's father had been at one +time great friends, insomuch that David was named after him, and +Lambert, as his godfather as well as uncle, presented the child with +the usual silver mug. Lambert was never known to have married, but +there were rumors, dating as far as back David's earliest +recollections, to the effect that he had entertained a secret and +obscure passion for some foreign woman of great beauty, but of doubtful +character and antecedents. Nobody could be found who had ever seen this +woman, or would accept the responsibility of asserting that she +actually existed; but she afforded a convenient means of accounting for +many things that seemed mysterious in Mr. Lambert's conduct. At length, +when David was about eight years old, his godfather left England +abruptly, and without telling any one whither he was going or when he +would return. As a matter of fact he never did return, nor had any +certain news ever been heard of him since his departure. Neither his +house nor his farm was ever sold, however, though they were rented to +more than one tenant during a number of years. It was said, also, that +Lambert held possession of some valuable real estate in London. +Nevertheless, in process of time he was forgotten, or remembered only +as a name. And the new generation of men, though they might speak of +"the old Lambert House," neither knew nor cared how it happened to have +that title. For aught they could tell, it might have borne it ever +since Queen Elizabeth's time. Even David Poindexter had long ceased to +think of his uncle as anything much more substantial than a dream. + +He was all the more surprised, therefore, when, on the day following +the interview just mentioned, he received a letter from the late David +Lambert's lawyers. It informed him in substance that his uncle had died +in Constantinople, unmarried (so far as could be ascertained), +intestate, and without blood-relations surviving him. Under these +circumstances, his property, amounting to one hundred and sixty +thousand pounds, the bulk of which was invested in land and houses in +the city of London, as well as the country-seat in Witton known as the +old Lambert House, and the farm lands thereto appertaining--all this +wealth, not to mention four or five thousand pounds in ready money, +came into possession of the late David Lambert's nearest of kin, who, +as it appeared, was none other than the Reverend David Poindexter. +"Would that gentleman, therefore be kind enough, at his convenience, to +advise his obedient servants as to what disposition he wished to make +of his inheritance?" + +It was a Saturday morning, and the young clergyman was sitting at his +study table; the fire was burning in the grate at his right hand, and +his half-written sermon lay on the desk before him. After reading the +letter, at first hurriedly and amazedly, afterward more slowly, with +frequent pauses, he folded it up, and, still holding it in his hand, +leaned back in his chair, and remained for the better part of an hour +in a state of deep preoccupation. Many changing expressions passed +across his face, and glowed in his dark-blue eyes, and trembled on the +curves of his lips. At last he roused himself, sat erect, and smote the +table violently with his clinched hand. Yes, it was true it was real; +he, David Poindexter, an hour ago the poor imprisoned clergyman of the +Church of England--he, as by a stroke of magic, was free, powerful, +emancipated, the heir of seven thousand pounds a year! And what about +tomorrow's sermon? + +He rose up smiling, with a vivid color in his cheeks and a bright +sparkle in his eyes. He stretched himself to his full height, threw out +his arms, and smote his chest with both fists. What a load was gone +from his heart! What a new ardor of life was this that danced in his +veins! He walked with long strides to the window, and threw it wide +open, breathing in the rush of bright icy air with deep inhalations. +Freedom! emancipation! Yonder, above the dark, level boughs of the +cedar of Lebanon, rose the square, gray tower of the church. Yesterday +it was the incubus of his vain hopes; to-day it was the tomb of a dead +and despised past. What had David Poindexter to do with calling sinners +to repentance? Let him first find out for himself what sin was like. +Then he looked to the right, where between the leafless trees Colonel +Saltine's little dwelling raised its red-tile roof above the high +garden-wall. And so, Edith, you doubted whether I were at all times my +real self? You shall not need to make that complaint hereafter. As for +to-morrow's sermon--I am not he who wrote sermons, nor shall I ever +preach any. Away with it, therefore! + +He strode back to the table, took up the sheets of manuscript from the +desk, tore them across, and laid them on the burning coals. They +smoldered for a moment, then blazed up, and the draught from the open +window whisked the blackened ashes up the chimney. David stood, +meanwhile, with his arms folded, smiling to himself, and repeating, in +a low voice: + +"Never again--never again--never again." + +By-and-by he reseated himself at his desk, and hurriedly wrote two or +three notes, one of which was directed to Miss Saltine. He gave them to +his servant with an injunction to deliver them at their addresses +during the afternoon. Looking at his watch, he was surprised to find +that it was already past twelve o'clock. He went up-stairs, packed a +small portmanteau, made some changes in his dress, and came down again +with a buoyant step. There was a decanter half full of sherry on the +sideboard in the dining-room; he poured out and drank two glasses in +succession. This done, he put on his hat, and left the house with his +portmanteau in his hand, and ten minutes later he had intercepted the +London coach, and was bowling along on his way to the city. + +There was a dramatic instinct in David, as in many eloquent men of +impressionable temperament, which caused him every now and then to look +upon all that was occurring as a sort of play, and to resolve to act +his part in a telling and picturesque manner. On that Saturday +afternoon he had an interview with the late Mr. Lambert's lawyers, and +they were struck by his calm, lofty, and indifferent bearing. He seemed +to regard worldly prosperity as a thing beneath him, yet to feel in a +half-impatient way the responsibility which the control of wealth +forced upon him. + +"It is my purpose not to allow this legacy to interfere permanently +with my devotion to my higher duties," he remarked, "but I have taken +measures to enable myself to place these affairs upon a fixed and +convenient footing. I presume," he added, fixing his eyes steadily upon +his interlocutor, "that you have thoroughly investigated the +possibility of there being any claimant nearer than myself?" + +"No such claimant could exist," the lawyer replied, "unless the late +Mr. Lambert had married and had issue." + +"Is there, then, any reason to suppose that he contemplated the +contingency that has happened?" + +"If he bestowed any thought at all upon the subject, that contingency +could hardly have failed to present itself to his mind," the lawyer +answered. + +David consented to receive the draft for a thousand pounds which was +tendered him, and took his leave. He returned to his rooms at the +Tavistock Hotel, Covent Garden. In the evening, after making some +changes in his costume, he went to the theatre, and saw Kean play +something of Shakespeare's. When the play was over, and he was out in +the frosty air again, he felt it impossible to sleep. It was after +midnight before he returned to his hotel, with flushed cheeks, and a +peculiar brilliance in his eyes. He slept heavily, but awoke early in +the morning with a slight feeling of feverishness. It was Sunday +morning. He thought of his study in the parsonage at Witton, with its +bright fire, its simplicity, its repose. He thought of the church, and +of the congregation which he would never face again. And Edith--what +had been her thoughts and dreams during the night? He got up, and went +to the window. It looked out upon a narrow, inclosed court. The sky was +dingy, the air was full of the muffled tumult of the city. His present +state, as to its merely external aspect, was certainly not so agreeable +as that of the morning before. Ay, but what a vista had opened now +which then was closed! David dressed himself, and went down to his +breakfast. While sitting at his table in the window, looking out upon +the market-place, and stirring his cup of Mocha, a gentleman came up +and accosted him. + +"Am I mistaken, or is your name Poindexter?" + +David looked up, and recognized Harwood Courtney, a son of Lord +Derwent. Courtney was a man of fashion, a member of the great clubs, +and a man, as they say, with a reputation. He was a good twenty years +older than David, and had been the companion of the latter's father in +some of his wildest escapades. To David, at this moment, he was the +representative and symbol of that great, splendid, unregenerate world, +with which it was his purpose to make acquaintance. + +"You are not mistaken, Mr. Courtney," he said, quietly. "Have you +breakfasted? It is some time since we have met." + +"Why, yes, egad! If I remember right, you were setting out on another +road than that which I was travelling. However, we sinners, you know, +depend upon you parsons to pull us up in time to prevent any--er--any +_very_ serious catastrophe! Ha! ha!" + +"I understand you; but for my part I have left the pulpit," said David, +uttering the irrevocable words with a carelessness which he himself +wondered at. + +"By Jove!" exclaimed Courtney, with a little intonation of surprise and +curiosity, which his good breeding prevented him from formulating more +explicitly. As David made no rejoinder, he presently continued: +"Then--er--perhaps you might find it in your way to dine with me this +evening. Only one or two friends--a very quiet Sunday party." + +"Thank you," said David. "I had intended going to bed betimes to-night; +but it will give me pleasure to meet a quiet party." + +"Then that's settled," exclaimed Courtney; "and meanwhile, if you've +finished your coffee, what do you say to a turn in the Row? I've got my +trap here, and a breath of air will freshen us up." + +David and Courtney spent the day together, and by evening the young +ex-clergyman had made the acquaintance of many of the leading men about +town. He had also allowed the fact to transpire that his pecuniary +standing was of the soundest kind; but this was done so +skillfully--with such a lofty air--that even Courtney, who was as +cynical as any man, was by no means convinced that David's change of +fortune had anything to do with his relinquishing the pulpit. + +"David Poindexter is no fool," he remarked, confidentially, to a +friend. "He has double the stuff in him that the old fellow had. You +must get up early to get the better of a man who has been a parson, and +seen through himself!" + +David, in fact, felt himself the superior, intellectually and by +nature, of most of the men he saw. He penetrated and comprehended them, +but to them he was impenetrable; a certain air of authority rested upon +him; he had abandoned the service of God; but the training whereby he +had fitted himself for it stood him in good stead; it had developed his +insight, his subtlety, and, strange to say, his powers of +dissimulation. Contrary to what is popularly supposed, his study of the +affairs of the other world had enabled him to deal with this world's +affairs with a half-contemptuous facility. As for the minor +technicalities, the social pass-words, and so forth, to which much +importance is generally ascribed, David had nothing to fear from them; +first, because he was a man of noble manners, naturally as well as by +cultivation; and, secondly, because the fact that he had been a +clergyman acted as a sort of breastplate against criticism. It would be +thought that he chose to appear ignorant of that which he really knew. + +As for Mr. Courtney's dinner, though it may doubtless have been a quiet +one from his point of view, it differed considerably from such Sunday +festivities as David had been accustomed to. A good deal of wine was +drunk, and the conversation (a little cautious at first, on David's +account) gradually thawed into freedom. It was late when they rose from +table; and then a proposition was made to go to a certain well-known +club in St. James's Street. David went with the rest, and, for the +first time in his life, played cards for money; he lost seven hundred +pounds--more money than he had handled during the last three years--but +he kept his head, and at three o'clock in the morning drove with +Courtney to the latter's lodgings, with five hundred pounds in his +pocket over and above the sum with which he had begun to play. Here was +a wonderful change in his existence; but it did not seem to him half so +wonderful as his reason told him it was. It seemed natural--as if, +after much wandering, he had at last found his way into the place where +he belonged. It is said that savages, educated from infancy amid +civilized surroundings, will, on breathing once more their native air, +tear off their clothes and become savages again. Somewhat similar may +have been David's case, who, inheriting in a vivid degree the manly +instincts of his forefathers, had forcibly and by constraint of +circumstances lived a life wholly opposed to these impulses--an +artificial life, therefore. But now at length he had come into his +birthright, and felt at home. + +One episode of the previous evening remained in his memory: it had +produced an effect upon him out of proportion with its apparent +significance. A gentleman, a guest at the dinner, a small man with +sandy hair and keen gray eyes, on being presented to David had looked +at him with an expression of shrewd perplexity, and said: + +"Have we not met before?" + +"It is possible, but I confess I do not recollect it," replied David. + +"The name was not Poindexter," continued the other, "but the +face--pardon me--I could have taken my oath to." + +"Where did this meeting take place?" asked David, smiling. + +"In Paris, at ----'s," said the gray-eyed gentleman (mentioning the +name of a well-known French nobleman). + +"You are quite certain, of that?" + +"Yes. It was but a month since." + +"I was never in Paris. For three years I have hardly been out of sight +of London," David answered. "What was your friend's name?" + +"It has slipped my memory," he replied. "An Italian name, I fancy. But +he was a man--pardon me--of very striking appearance, and I conversed +with him for more than an hour." + +Now it is by no means an uncommon occurrence for two persons to bear a +close resemblance to each other, but (aside from the fact that David +was anything but an ordinary-looking man) this mistake of his new +acquaintance affected him oddly. He involuntarily associated it with +the internal and external transformation which had happened to him, and +said to himself: + +"This counterpart of mine was prophetic: he was what I am to be--what I +am." And fantastic though the notion was, he could not rid himself of +it. + +David returned to Witton about the middle of the week. In the interval +he had taken measures to make known to those concerned the revolution +of his affairs, and to have the old Lambert mansion opened, and put in +some sort of condition for his reception. He had gone forth on foot, an +unknown, poor, and humble clergyman; he returned driving behind a pair +of horses, by far the most important personage in the town; and yet +this outward change was far less great than the change within. His +reception could scarcely be called cordial; though not wanting in the +technical respect and ceremony due to him as a gentleman of wealth and +influence, he could perceive a half concealed suspense and misgiving, +due unmistakably to his attitude as a recreant clergyman. + +In fact, his worthy parishioners were in a terrible quandary how to +reconcile their desire to stand well with their richest +fellow-townsman, and their dismayed recognition of that townsman's +scandalous professional conduct. David smiled at this, but it made him +bitter too. He had intended once more to call the congregation +together, and frankly to explain to them the reasons, good or bad, +which had induced him to withdraw from active labor in the church. But +now he determined to preserve a proud and indifferent silence. There +was only one person who had a right to call him to account, and it was +not without fearfulness that he looked forward to his meeting with her. +However, the sooner such fears are put at rest the better, and he +called upon Edith on the evening of his arrival. Her father had been in +bed for two days with a cold, and she was sitting alone in the little +parlor. + +She rose at his entrance with a deep blush, and a look of mixed +gladness and anxiety. Her eyes swiftly noted the change in his dress, +for he had considerably modified, though not as yet wholly laid aside, +the external marks of his profession. She held back from him with a +certain strangeness and timidity, so that lie did not kiss her cheek, +but only her hand. The first words of greeting were constrained and +conventional, but at last he said: + +"All is changed, Edith, except our love for each other." + +"I do not hold you to that," she answered, quickly. + +"But you can not turn me from it," he said, with a smile. + +"I do not know you yet," said she, looking away. + +"When I last saw you, you said you doubted whether I were my real self. +I have become my real self since then." + +"Because you are not what you were, it does not follow that you are +what you should be." + +"Surely, Edith, that is not reasonable. I was what circumstances forced +me to be, henceforth I shall be what God made me." + +"Did God, then, have no hand in those circumstances?" + +"Not more, at all events, than in these." + +Edith shook her head. "God does not absolve us from holy vows." + +"But how if I can not, with loyalty to my inner conscience, hold to +those vows?" exclaimed David, with more warmth. "I have long felt that +I was not fitted for this sacred calling. Before the secret tribunal of +my self-knowledge, I have stood charged with the sin of hypocrisy. It +has been God's will that I be delivered from that sin." + +"Why did you not say that before, David?" she demanded, looking at him. +"Why did you remain a hypocrite until it was for your worldly benefit +to abandon your trust? Can you say, on your word of honor, that you +would stand where you do now if you were still poor instead of rich?" + +"Men's eyes are to some extent opened and their views are confirmed by +events. They make our dreams and forebodings into realities. We +question in our minds, and events give us the answers." + +"Such an argument might excuse any villainy," said Edith, lifting her +head indignantly. + +"Villainy! Do you use that word to me?" exclaimed David. + +"Not unless your own heart bids me--and I do not know your heart." + +"Because you do not love me?" + +"You may be right," replied Edith, striving to steady her voice; "but +at least I believed I loved you." + +"You are cured of that belief, it seems--as I am cured of many foolish +faiths," said David, with gloomy bitterness. "Well, so be it! The love +that waits upon a fastidious conscience is never the deepest love. My +love is not of that complexion. Were it possible that the shadow of +sin, or of crime itself, could descend upon you, it would but render +you dearer to me than before." + +"You may break my heart, David, if you will," cried the girl, +tremulously, yet resolutely, "but I reverence love more than I love +you." + +David had turned away as if to leave the room, but he paused and +confronted her once more. + +"At any rate, we will understand each other," said he. "Do you make it +your condition that I should go back to the ministry?" + +Edith was still seated, but the condition of the crisis compelled her +to rise. She stood before him, her dark eyes downcast, her lips +trembling, nervously drawing the fingers of one hand through the clasp +of the other. She was tempted to yield to him, for she could imagine no +happiness in life without him; but a rare sanity and integrity of mind +made her perceive that he had pushed the matter to a false alternative. +It was not a question of preaching or not preaching sermons, but of +sinful apostasy from an upright life. At last she raised her eyes, +which shone like dark jewels in her pale countenance, and said, slowly, +"We had better part." + +"Then my sins be upon your head!" cried David, passionately. + +The blood mounted to her cheeks at the injustice of this rejoinder, but +she either could not or would not answer again. She remained erect and +proud until the door had closed between them; what she did after that +neither David nor any one else knew. + +The apostate David seems to have determined that, if she were to bear +the burden of his sins, they should be neither few nor light. His life +for many weeks after this interview was a scandal and a disgrace. The +old Lambert mansion was the scene of carousals and excesses such as +recalled the exploits of the monks of Medmenham. Harwood Courtney, and +a score of dissolute gentlemen like him, not to speak of other +visitors, thronged the old house day and night; drinking, gaming, and +yet wilder doings gave the sober little town no rest, till the Reverend +David Poindexter was commonly referred to as the Wicked Parson. +Meanwhile Edith Saltine bore herself with a grave, pale impassiveness, +which some admired, others wondered at, and others deemed an indication +that she had no heart. If she had not, so much the better for her; for +her father was almost as difficult to manage as David himself. The old +gentleman could neither comprehend nor forgive what seemed to him his +daughter's immeasurable perversity. One day she had been all for +marrying a poor, unknown preacher; and the next day, when to marry him +meant to be the foremost lady in the neighborhood, she dismissed him +without appeal. And the worst of it was that, much as the poor +colonel's mouth watered at the feasts and festivities of the Lambert +mansion, he was prevented by the fatality of his position from taking +any part in them. So Edith could find no peace either at home or +abroad; and if it dwelt not in her own heart, she was indeed forlorn. + +What may have been the cost of all this dissipation it was difficult to +say, but several observant persons were of opinion that the parson's +income could not long stand it. There were rumors that he had heavy +bills owing in several quarters, which he could pay only by realizing +some of his investments. On the other hand, it was said that he played +high and constantly, and usually had the devil's luck. But it is +impossible to gauge the truth of such stories, and the Wicked Parson +himself took no pains either to deny or confirm them. He was always the +loudest, the gayest, and the most reckless of his company, and the +leader and inspirer of all their wild proceedings; but it was noticed +that, though he laughed often, he never smiled; and that his face, when +in repose, bore traces of anything but happiness. For some cause or +other, moreover--but whether maliciously or remorsefully was open to +question--he never entirely laid aside his clerical garb; he seemed +either to delight in profaning it, or to retain it as the reminder and +scourge of his own wickedness. + +One night there was a great gathering up at the mansion, and the noise +and music were kept up till well past the small hours of the morning. +Gradually the guests departed, some going toward London, some +elsewhere. At last only Harwood Courtney remained, and he and David sat +down in the empty dining-room, disorderly with the remains of the +carousal, to play picquet. They played, with short intermissions, for +nearly twenty-four hours. At last David threw down his cards, and said, +quietly: + +"Well, that's all. Give me until to-morrow." + +"With all the pleasure in life, my boy," replied the other; "and your +revenge, too, if you like. Meanwhile, the best thing we can do is to +take a nap." + +"You may do so if you please," said David; "for my part, I must take a +turn on horseback first. I can never sleep till I have breathed fresh +air." + +They parted accordingly, Courtney going to his room, and David to the +stables, whence he presently issued, mounted on his bay mare, and rode +eastward. On his way he passed Colonel Saltine's house, and drew rein +for a moment beside it, looking up at Edith's window. It was between +four and five o'clock of a morning in early April; the sky was clear, +and all was still and peaceful. As he sat in the saddle looking up, the +blind of the window was raised and the sash itself opened, and Edith, +in her white night-dress, with her heavy brown hair falling round her +face and on her shoulders, gazed out. She regarded him with a +half-bewildered expression, as if doubting of his reality, For a moment +they remained thus; then he waved his hand to her with a wild gesture +of farewell, and rode on, passing immediately out of sight behind the +dark foliage of the cedar of Lebanon. + +On reaching the London high-road the horseman paused once more, and +seemed to hesitate what course to pursue; but finally he turned to the +right, and rode in a southerly direction. The road wound gently, and +dipped and rose to cross low hills; trees bordered the way on each +side; and as the sun rose they threw long shadows westward, while the +birds warbled and twittered in the fields and hedges. By-and-by a clump +of woodland came into view about half a mile off, the road passing +through the midst of it. As David entered it at one end, he saw, +advancing toward him through the shade and sunlight, a rider mounted on +a black horse. The latter seemed to be a very spirited animal, and as +David drew near it suddenly shied and reared so violently that any but +a practiced horseman would have been unseated. No catastrophe occurred, +however, and a moment afterward the two cavaliers were face to face. No +sooner had their eyes met than, as if by a common impulse, they both +drew rein, and set staring at each other with a curiosity which merged +into astonishment. At length the stranger on the black horse gave a +short laugh, and said: + +"I perceive that the same strange thing has struck us both, sir. If you +won't consider it uncivil, I should like to know who you are. My name +is Giovanni Lambert." + +"Giovanni Lambert," repeated David, with a slight involuntary movement; +"unless I am mistaken, I have heard mention of you. But you are not +Italian?" + +"Only on my mother's side. But you have the advantage of me." + +"You will understand that I could not have heard of you without feeling +a strong desire to meet you," said David, dismounting as he spoke. "It +is, I think, the only desire left me in the world. I had marked this +wood, as I came along, as an inviting place to rest in. Would it suit +you to spend an hour here, where we can converse better at our ease +than in saddle; or does time press you? As for me, I have little more +to do with time." + +"I am at your service, sir, with pleasure," returned the other, leaping +lightly to the ground, and revealing by the movement a pair of small +pistols attached to the belt beneath his blue riding surtout. "It was +in my mind, also, to stretch my legs and take a pull at my pipe, for, +early as it is, I have ridden far this morning." + +At the point where they had halted a green lane branched off into the +depths of the wood, and down this they passed, leading their horses. +When they were out of sight of the road they made their animals fast in +such a way that they could crop the grass, and themselves reclined at +the foot of a broad-limbed oak, and they remained in converse there for +upward of an hour. + +In fact, it must been several hours later (for the sun was high in the +heavens) when one of them issued from the wood. He was mounted on a +black horse, and wore a blue surtout and high boots. After looking up +and down the road, and assuring himself that no one was in sight, he +turned his horse's head toward London, and set off at a round canter. +Coming to a cross-road, he turned to the right, and rode for an hour in +that direction, crossing the Thames near Hampton Wick. In the afternoon +he entered London from the south, and put up at an obscure hostelry. +Having seen his horse attended to, and eaten something himself, he went +to bed and slept soundly for eighteen hours. On awaking, he ate +heartily again, and spent the rest of the day in writing and arranging +a quantity of documents that were packed in his saddle-bags. The next +morning early he paid his reckoning, rode across London Bridge, and +shaped his course toward the west. + +Meanwhile the town of Witton was in vast perturbation. When Mr. Harwood +Courtney woke up late in the afternoon, and came yawning down-stairs to +get his breakfast, he learned, in answer to his inquiries, that nothing +had been seen of David Poindexter since he rode away thirteen hours +ago. Mr. Courtney expressed anxiety at this news, and dispatched his +own valet and one of David's grooms to make investigations in the +neighborhood. These two personages investigated to such good purpose +that before night the whole neighborhood was aware that David +Poindexter had disappeared. By the next morning it became evident that +something had happened to the Wicked Parson, and some people ventured +to opine that the thing which had happened to him was that he had run +away. And indeed it was astonishing to find to how many worthy people +this evil-minded parson was in debt. Every other man you met had a bill +against the Reverend David Poindexter in his pocket; and as the day +wore on, and still no tidings of the missing man were received, +individuals of the sheriff and bailiff species began to be +distinguishable amid the crowd. But the great sensation was yet to +come. How the report started no one knew, but toward supper-time it +passed from mouth to mouth that Mr. Harwood Courtney, in the course of +his twenty-four hours of picquet with Poindexter, had won from the +latter not his ready money alone, but the entire property and estates +that had accrued to him as nearest of kin to the late David Lambert. +And it was added that, as the debt was a gambling transaction, and +therefore not technically recoverable by process of law, Mr. Courtney +was naturally very anxious for his debtor to put in an appearance. Now +it so happened that this report, unlike many others ostensibly more +plausible, was true in every particular. + +Probably there was more gossip at the supper-tables of Witton that +night than in any other town of ten times the size in the United +Kingdom; and it was formally agreed that Poindexter had escaped to the +Continent, and would either remain in hiding there, or take passage by +the first opportunity to the American colonies, or the United States, +as they had now been called for some years past. Nobody defended the +reverend apostate, but, on the other hand, nobody pretended to be sorry +for Mr. Harwood Courtney; it was generally agreed that they had both of +them got what they deserved. The only question was, What was to become +of the property? Some people said it ought to belong to Edith Saltine; +but of course poetical justice of that kind was not to be expected. + +Edith, meanwhile, had kept herself strictly secluded. She was the last +person who had seen David Poindexter, but she had mentioned the fact to +no one. She was also the only person who did not believe that he had +escaped, but who felt convinced that he was dead, and that he had died +by his own hand. That gesture of farewell and of despair which he had +made to her as he vanished behind the cedar of Lebanon had for her a +significance capable of only one interpretation. Were he alive, he +would have returned. + +On the evening of the day following the events just recorded, the +solitude of her room suddenly became terrible to Edith, and she was +irresistibly impelled to dress herself and go forth in the open air. +She wound a veil about her head, and, avoiding the main thoroughfare, +slipped out of the town unperceived, and gained the free country. After +a while she found herself approaching a large tree, which spread its +branches across a narrow lane that made a short-cut to the London +highway. Beneath the tree was a natural seat, formed of a fragment of +stone, and here David and she had often met and sat. It was a mild, +still evening; she sat down on the stone, and removed her veil. The +moon, then in its first quarter, was low in the west, and shone beneath +the branches of the tree. + +Presently she was aware--though not by any sound--that some one was +approaching, and she drew back in the shadow of the tree. Down the lane +came a horseman, mounted on a tall, black horse. The outline of his +figure and the manner in which he rode fixed Edith's gaze as if by a +spell, and made the blood hum in her ears. Nearer he came, and now his +face was discernible in the level moonlight. It was impossible to +mistake that countenance: the horseman was David Poindexter. His +costume, however, was different from any he had ever before worn; there +was nothing clerical about it; nor was that black horse from the +Poindexter stables. Then, too, how noiselessly he rode!--as noiselessly +as a ghost. That, however, must have been because his horse's hoofs +fell on the soft turf. He rode slowly, and his head was bent as if in +thought; but almost before Edith could draw her breath, much less to +speak, he had passed beneath the boughs of the tree, and was riding on +toward the village. Now he had vanished in the vague light and shadow, +and a moment later Edith began to doubt whether her senses had not +played her a trick. A superstitious horror fell upon her; what she had +seen was a spirit, not living flesh and blood. She knelt down by the +stone, and remained for a long time with her face hidden upon her arms, +and her hands clasped, sometimes praying, sometimes wondering and +fearing. At last she rose to her feet, and hastened homeward through +the increasing darkness. But before she had reached her house she had +discovered that what she had seen was no ghost. The whole village was +in a fever of excitement. + +Everybody was full of the story. An hour ago who should appear riding +quietly up the village street but David Poindexter himself--at least, +if it were not he, it was the devil. He seemed to take little notice of +the astonished glances that were thrown at him, or, at any rate, not to +understand them. Instead of going to the Lambert mansion, he had +alighted at the inn, and asked the innkeeper whether he might have +lodging there. But when the innkeeper, who had known the reverend +gentleman as well as he knew his own sign-board, had addressed him by +name, the other had shaken his head, seemed perplexed, and had affirmed +that his name was not Poindexter but Lambert; and had added, upon +further inquiry, that he was the only son of David Lambert, and was +come to claim that gentleman's property, to which he was by law +entitled; in proof whereof he had produced various documents, among +them the certificates of his mother's marriage and of his own birth. As +to David Poindexter, he declared that he knew not there was such a +person; and although no man in his senses could be made to believe that +David Poindexter and this so-called Lambert were twain, and not one and +the same individual, the latter stoutly maintained his story, and vowed +that the truth would sooner or later appear and confirm him. Meanwhile, +however, one of his creditors had had him arrested for a debt of eight +hundred pounds; and Harwood Courtney had seen him, and said that he was +ready to pledge his salvation that the man was Poindexter and nobody +else. So here the matter rested for the present. But who ever heard of +so strange and audacious an attempt at imposition? The man had not even +made any effort to disguise himself further than to put on a different +suit of clothes and get another horse; and why, in the name of all that +was inconceivable, had he come back to Witton, instead of going to any +other part of the earth's surface What could he expect here, except +immediate detection, imprisonment, and ruin? Was he insane? He did not +seem to be so; but that interpretation of his conduct was not only the +most charitable one, but no other could be imagined that would account +for the facts. + +Witton slept but little that night; but who shall describe its +bewilderment when, early in the morning, a constable arrived in the +village with the news that the dead body of the Reverend David +Poindexter had been found in some woods about fifteen miles off, and +that his bay mare had been picked up grazing along the roadside not far +from home! Upon the heels of this intelligence came the corpse itself, +lying in a country wagon, and the bay mare trotting behind. It was +taken out and placed on the table in the inn parlor, where it +immediately became the center of a crowd half crazy with curiosity and +amazement. The cause of death was found to be the breaking of the +vertebral column just at the base of the neck. There was no other +injury on the body, and, allowing for the natural changes incident to +death, the face was in every particular the face of David Poindexter. +The man who called himself Lambert was now brought into the room, and +made to stand beside the corpse, which he regarded with a certain calm +interest. The resemblance between the two was minute and astonishing; +it was found to be impossible, upon that evidence alone, to decide +which was David Poindexter. + +The matter was brought to trial as promptly as possible. A great number +of witnesses identified the prisoner as David Poindexter, but those who +had seen the corpse mostly gave their evidence an opposite inclination; +and four persons (one of them the gray-eyed gentleman who has been +already mentioned) swore positively that the prisoner was Giovanni +Lambert, the gray-eyed gentleman adding that he had once met +Poindexter, and had confidently taken him to be Lambert. + +An attempt was then made to prove that Lambert had murdered Poindexter; +but it entirely failed, there being no evidence that the two men had +ever so much as met, and there being no conceivable motive for the +murder. Lambert, therefore, was permitted to enter undisturbed upon his +inheritance; for he had no difficulty in establishing the fact of the +elder Lambert's marriage to an Italian woman twenty-three years before. +The marriage had been a secret one, and soon after a violent quarrel +had taken place between the wife and husband, and they had separated. +The following month Giovanni was born prematurely. He had seen his +father but once. The quarrel was never made up, but Lambert sent his +wife, from time to time, money enough for her support. She had died +about ten years ago, and had given her son the papers to establish his +identity, telling him that the day would come to use them. Giovanni had +been a soldier, fighting against the French in Spain and elsewhere, and +had only heard of his father's death a few weeks ago. He had thereupon +come to claim his own, with the singular results that we have seen. + +Here was the end of the case, so far as the law was concerned; but the +real end of it is worth noting. Lambert, by his own voluntary act, paid +all the legal debts contracted by Poindexter, and gave Courtney, in +settlement of the gambling transaction, a sum of fifty thousand pounds. +The remainder of his fortune, which was still considerable, he devoted +almost entirely to charitable purposes, doing so much genuine good, in +a manner so hearty and unassuming, that he became the object of more +personal affection than falls to the lot of most philanthropists. He +was of a quiet, sad, and retiring disposition, and uniformly very +sparing of words. After a year or so, circumstances brought it about +that he and Miss Saltine were associated in some benevolent enterprise, +and from that time forward they often consulted together in such +matters, Lambert making her the medium of many of his benefactions. Of +course the gossips were ready to predict that it would end with a +marriage; and indeed it was impossible to see the two together (though +both of them, and especially Edith, had altered somewhat with the +passage of years) without being reminded of the former love affair in +which Lambert's double had been the hero. Did this also occur to Edith? +It could hardly have been otherwise, and it would be interesting to +speculate on her feelings in the matter; but I have only the story to +tell. At all events, they never did marry, though they became very +tender friends. At the end of seven years Colonel Saltine died of +jaundice; he had been failing in his mind for some time previous, and +had always addressed Lambert as Poindexter, and spoken of him as his +son-in-law. The year following Lambert himself died, after a brief +illness. He left all his property to Edith. She survived to her +seventieth year, making it the business of her life to carry out his +philanthropic schemes, and she always dressed in widows' weeds. After +her death, the following passage was found in one of her private +journals. It refers to her last interview with Lambert, on his +death-bed: + +".... He smiled, and said, 'You will believe, now, that I was sincere +in renouncing the ministry, though I have tried to serve the Lord in +other ways than from the pulpit.' I felt a shock in my heart, and could +hardly say, 'What do you mean, Mr. Lambert?' He replied, 'Surely, +Edith, your soul knows, if your reason does not, that I am David +Poindexter!' I could not speak. I hid my face in my hands. After a +while, in separate sentences, he told me the truth. When he rode forth +on that dreadful morning it was with the purpose to die. But he met on +the road this Giovanni Lambert, who so marvelously resembled him, and +they sat down together in the wood and talked, and Giovanni told him +all the story of his life.... As Giovanni was about to mount his horse, +which was very restive, he saw a violet in the grass, and stooped to +pick it. The horse lashed out with its heels, and struck him in the +back of the neck and killed him.... Then the idea came to David to +exchange clothes with the dead man, and to take his papers, and +personate him. Thus, he could escape from the individuality which was +his curse, and find his true self, as it were, in another person. He +said, too, that his greatest hope had been to win my love and make me +his wife; but he found that he could not bring himself to attempt that, +unless he confessed his falsehood to me, and he had feared that this +confession would turn me from him forever. I wept, and told him that my +heart had been his almost from the first, because I always thought of +him as David, and that I would have loved him through all things. He +said, 'Then God has been more merciful to me than I deserve; but, +doubtless, it is also of His mercy that we have remained unmarried.' +But I was in an agony, and could not yet be reconciled. At last he +said, 'Will you kiss me, Edith?' and afterward he said, 'My wife!' and +that was his last word. But we shall meet again!" + + + + +KEN'S MYSTERY. + + +One cool October evening--it was the last day of the month, and +unusually cool for the time of year--I made up my mind to go and spend +an hour or two with my friend Keningale. Keningale was an artist (as +well as a musical amateur and poet), and had a very delightful studio +built onto his house, in which he was wont to sit of an evening. The +studio had a cavernous fire-place, designed in imitation of the +old-fashioned fire-places of Elizabethan manor-houses, and in it, when +the temperature out-doors warranted, he would build up a cheerful fire +of dry logs. It would suit me particularly well, I thought, to go and +have a quiet pipe and chat in front of that fire with my friend. + +I had not had such a chat for a very long time--not, in fact, since +Keningale (or Ken, as his friends called him) had returned from his +visit to Europe the year before. He went abroad, as he affirmed at the +time, "for purposes of study," whereat we all smiled, for Ken, so far +as we knew him, was more likely to do anything else than to study. He +was a young fellow of buoyant temperament, lively and social in his +habits, of a brilliant and versatile mind, and possessing an income of +twelve or fifteen thousand dollars a year; he could sing, play, +scribble, and paint very cleverly, and some of his heads and +figure-pieces were really well done, considering that he never had any +regular training in art; but he was not a worker. Personally he was +fine-looking, of good height and figure, active, healthy, and with a +remarkably fine brow, and clear, full-gazing eye. Nobody was surprised +at his going to Europe, nobody expected him to do anything there except +amuse himself, and few anticipated that he would be soon again seen in +New York. He was one of the sort that find Europe agree with them. Off +he went, therefore; and in the course of a few months the rumor reached +us that he was engaged to a handsome and wealthy New York girl whom he +had met in London. This was nearly all we did hear of him until, not +very long afterward, he turned up again on Fifth Avenue, to every one's +astonishment; made no satisfactory answer to those who wanted to know +how he happened to tire so soon of the Old World; while, as to the +reported engagement, he cut short all allusion to that in so peremptory +a manner as to show that it was not a permissible topic of conversation +with him. It was surmised that the lady had jilted him; but, on the +other hand, she herself returned home not a great while after, and, +though she had plenty of opportunities, she has never married to this +day. + +Be the rights of that matter what they may, it was soon remarked that +Ken was no longer the careless and merry fellow he used to be; on the +contrary, he appeared grave, moody, averse from general society, and +habitually taciturn and undemonstrative even in the company of his most +intimate friends. Evidently something had happened to him, or he had +done something. What? Had he committed a murder? or joined the +Nihilists? or was his unsuccessful love affair at the bottom of it? +Some declared that the cloud was only temporary, and would soon pass +away. Nevertheless, up to the period of which I am writing, it had not +passed away, but had rather gathered additional gloom, and threatened +to become permanent. + +Meanwhile I had met him twice or thrice at the club, at the opera, or +in the street, but had as yet had no opportunity of regularly renewing +my acquaintance with him. We had been on a footing of more than common +intimacy in the old days, and I was not disposed to think that he would +refuse to renew the former relations now. But what I had heard and +myself seen of his changed condition imparted a stimulating tinge of +suspense or curiosity to the pleasure with which I looked forward to +the prospects of this evening. His house stood at a distance of two or +three miles beyond the general range of habitations in New York at this +time, and as I walked briskly along in the clear twilight air I had +leisure to go over in my mind all that I had known of Ken and had +divined of his character. After all, had there not always been +something in his nature--deep down, and held in abeyance by the +activity of his animal spirits--but something strange and separate, and +capable of developing under suitable conditions into--into what? As I +asked myself this question I arrived at his door; and it was with a +feeling of relief that I felt the next moment the cordial grasp of his +hand, and his voice bidding me welcome in a tone that indicated +unaffected gratification at my presence. He drew me at once into the +studio, relieved me of my hat and cane, and then put his hand on my +shoulder. + +"I am glad to see you," he repeated, with singular earnestness--"glad +to see you and to feel you; and to-night of all nights in the year." + +"Why to-night especially?" + +"Oh, never mind. It's just as well, too, you didn't let me know +beforehand you were coming; the unreadiness is all, to paraphrase the +poet. Now, with you to help me, I can drink a glass of whisky and water +and take a bit draw of the pipe. This would have been a grim night for +me if I'd been left to myself." + +"In such a lap of luxury as this, too!" said I, looking round at the +glowing fire-place, the low, luxurious chairs, and all the rich and +sumptuous fittings of the room. "I should have thought a condemned +murderer might make himself comfortable here." + +"Perhaps; but that's not exactly my category at present. But have you +forgotten what night this is? This is November-eve, when, as tradition +asserts, the dead arise and walk about, and fairies, goblins, and +spiritual beings of all kinds have more freedom and power than on any +other day of the year. One can see you've never been in Ireland." + +"I wasn't aware till now that you had been there, either." + +"Yes, I have been in Ireland. Yes--" He paused, sighed, and fell into a +reverie, from which, however, he soon roused himself by an effort, and +went to a cabinet in a corner of the room for the liquor and tobacco. +While he was thus employed I sauntered about the studio, taking note of +the various beauties, grotesquenesses, and curiosities that it +contained. Many things were there to repay study and arouse admiration; +for Ken was a good collector, having excellent taste as well as means +to back it. But, upon the whole, nothing interested me more than some +studies of a female head, roughly done in oils, and, judging from the +sequestered positions in which I found them, not intended by the artist +for exhibition or criticism. There were three or four of these studies, +all of the same face, but in different poses and costumes. In one the +head was enveloped in a dark hood, overshadowing and partly concealing +the features; in another she seemed to be peering duskily through a +latticed casement, lit by a faint moonlight; a third showed her +splendidly attired in evening costume, with jewels in her hair and +cars, and sparkling on her snowy bosom. The expressions were as various +as the poses; now it was demure penetration, now a subtle inviting +glance, now burning passion, and again a look of elfish and elusive +mockery. In whatever phase, the countenance possessed a singular and +poignant fascination, not of beauty merely, though that was very +striking, but of character and quality likewise. + +"Did you find this model abroad?" I inquired at length. "She has +evidently inspired yon, and I don't wonder at it." + +Ken, who had been mixing the punch, and had not noticed my movements, +now looked up, and said: "I didn't mean those to be seen. They don't +satisfy me, and I am going to destroy them; but I couldn't rest till +I'd made some attempts to reproduce--What was it you asked? Abroad? +Yes--or no. They were all painted here within the last six weeks." + +'"Whether they satisfy you or not, they are by far the best things of +yours I have ever seen." + +'"Well, let them alone, and tell me what you think of this beverage. To +my thinking, it goes to the right spot. It owes its existence to your +coming here. I can't drink alone, and those portraits are not company, +though, for aught I know, she might have come out of the canvas +to-night and sat down in that chair." Then, seeing my inquiring look, +he added, with a hasty laugh, "It's November-eve, you know, when +anything may happen, provided its strange enough. Well, here's to +ourselves." + +We each swallowed a deep draught of the smoking and aromatic liquor, +and set down our glasses with approval. The punch was excellent. Ken +now opened a box of cigars, and we seated ourselves before the +fire-place. + +"All we need now," I remarked, after a short silence, "is a little +music. By-the-by, Ken, have you still got the banjo I gave you before +you went abroad?" + +He paused so long before replying that I supposed he had not heard my +question. "I have got it," he said, at length, "but it will never make +any more music." + +"Got broken, eh? Can't it be mended? It was a fine instrument." + +"It's not broken, but it's past mending. You shall see for yourself." + +He arose as he spoke, and going to another part of the studio, opened a +black oak coffer, and took out of it a long object wrapped up in a +piece of faded yellow silk. He handed it to me, and when I had +unwrapped it, there appeared a thing that might once have been a banjo, +but had little resemblance to one now. It bore every sign of extreme +age. The wood of the handle was honeycombed with the gnawings of worms, +and dusty with dry-rot. The parchment head was green with mold, and +hung in shriveled tatters. The hoop, which was of solid silver, was so +blackened and tarnished that it looked like dilapidated iron. The +strings were gone, and most of the tuning-screws had dropped out of +their decayed sockets. Altogether it had the appearance of having been +made before the Flood, and been forgotten in the forecastle of Noah's +Ark ever since. + +"It is a curious relic, certainly," I said. "Where did you come across +it? I had no idea that the banjo was invented so long ago as this. It +certainly can't be less than two hundred years old, and may be much +older than that." + +Ken smiled gloomily. "You are quite right," lie said; "it is at least +two hundred years old, and yet it is the very same banjo that you gave +me a year ago." + +"Hardly," I returned, smiling in my turn, "since that was made to my +order with a view to presenting it to you." + +"I know that; but the two hundred years have passed since then. Yes; it +is absurd and impossible, I know, but nothing is truer. That banjo, +which was made last year, existed in the sixteenth century, and has +been rotting ever since. Stay. Give it to me a moment, and I'll +convince you. You recollect that your name and mine, with the date, +were engraved on the silver hoop?" + +"Yes; and there was a private mark of my own there, also." + +"Very well," said Ken, who had been rubbing a place on the hoop with a +corner of the yellow silk wrapper; "look at that." + +I took the decrepit instrument from him, and examined the spot which he +had rubbed. It was incredible, sure enough; but there were the names +and the date precisely as I had caused them to be engraved; and there, +moreover, was my own private mark, which I had idly made with an old +etching point not more than eighteen months before. After convincing +myself that there was no mistake, I laid the banjo across my knees, and +stared at my friend in bewilderment. He sat smoking with a kind of grim +composure, his eyes fixed upon the blazing logs. + +"I'm mystified, I confess," said I. "Come; what is the joke? What +method have you discovered of producing the decay of centuries on this +unfortunate banjo in a few months? And why did you do it? I have heard +of an elixir to counteract the effects of time, but your recipe seems +to work the other way--to make time rush forward at two hundred times +his usual rate, in one place, while he jogs on at his usual gait +elsewhere. Unfold your mystery, magician. Seriously, Ken, how on earth +did the thing happen?" + +"I know no more about it than you do," was his reply. "Either you and I +and all the rest of the living world are insane, or else there has been +wrought a miracle as strange as any in tradition. How can I explain it? +It is a common saying--a common experience, if you will--that we may, +on certain trying or tremendous occasions, live years in one moment. +But that's a mental experience, not a physical one, and one that +applies, at all events, only to human beings, not to senseless things +of wood and metal. You imagine the thing is some trick or jugglery. If +it be, I don't know the secret of it. There's no chemical appliance +that I ever heard of that will get a piece of solid wood into that +condition in a few months, or a few years. And it wasn't done in a few +years, or a few months either. A year ago today at this very hour that +banjo was as sound as when it left the maker's hands, and twenty-four +hours afterward--I'm telling you the simple truth--it was as you see it +now." + +The gravity and earnestness with which Ken made this astounding +statement were evidently not assumed, He believed every word that he +uttered. I knew not what to think. Of course my friend might be insane, +though he betrayed none of the ordinary symptoms of mania; but, however +that might be, there was the banjo, a witness whose silent testimony +there was no gainsaying. The more I meditated on the matter the more +inconceivable did it appear. Two hundred years--twenty-four hours; +these were the terms of the proposed equation. Ken and the banjo both +affirmed that the equation had been made; all worldly knowledge and +experience affirmed it to be impossible. "What was the explanation? +What is time? What is life? I felt myself beginning to doubt the +reality of all things. And so this was the mystery which my friend had +been brooding over since his return from abroad. No wonder it had +changed him. More to be wondered at was it that it had not changed him +more. + +"Can you tell me the whole story?" I demanded at length. + +Ken quaffed another draught from his glass of whisky and water and +rubbed his hand through his thick brown beard. "I have never spoken to +any one of it heretofore," he said, "and I had never meant to speak of +it. But I'll try and give you some idea of what it was. You know me +better than any one else; you'll understand the thing as far as it can +ever be understood, and perhaps I may be relieved of some of the +oppression it has caused me. For it is rather a ghastly memory to +grapple with alone, I can tell you." + +Hereupon, without further preface, Ken related the following tale. He +was, I may observe in passing, a naturally fine narrator. There were +deep, lingering tones in his voice, and he could strikingly enhance the +comic or pathetic effect of a sentence by dwelling here and there upon +some syllable. His features were equally susceptible of humorous and of +solemn expressions, and his eyes were in form and hue wonderfully +adapted to showing great varieties of emotion. Their mournful aspect +was extremely earnest and affecting; and when Ken was giving utterance +to some mysterious passage of the tale they had a doubtful, melancholy, +exploring look which appealed irresistibly to the imagination. But the +interest of his story was too pressing to allow of noticing these +incidental embellishments at the time, though they doubtless had their +influence upon me all the same. + +"I left New York on an Inman Line steamer, you remember," began Ken, +"and landed at Havre. I went the usual round of sight-seeing on the +Continent, and got round to London in July, at the height of the +season. I had good introductions, and met any number of agreeable and +famous people. Among others was a young lady, a countrywoman of my +own--you know whom I mean--who interested me very much, and before her +family left London she and I were engaged. We parted there for the +time, because she had the Continental trip still to make, while I +wanted to take the opportunity to visit the north of England and +Ireland. I landed at Dublin about the 1st of October, and, zigzagging +about the country, I found myself in County Cork about two weeks later. + +"There is in that region some of the most lovely scenery that human +eyes ever rested on, and it seems to be less known to tourists than +many places of infinitely less picturesque value. A lonely region too: +during my rambles I met not a single stranger like myself, and few +enough natives. It seems incredible that so beautiful a country should +be so deserted. After walking a dozen Irish miles you come across a +group of two or three one-roomed cottages, and, like as not, one or +more of those will have the roof off and the walls in ruins. The few +peasants whom one sees, however, are affable and hospitable, especially +when they hear you are from that terrestrial heaven whither most of +their friends and relatives have gone before them. They seem simple and +primitive enough at first sight, and yet they are as strange and +incomprehensible a race as any in the world. They are as superstitious, +as credulous of marvels, fairies, magicians, and omens, as the men whom +St. Patrick preached to, and at the same time they are shrewd, +skeptical, sensible, and bottomless liars. Upon the whole, I met with +no nation on my travels whose company I enjoyed so much, or who +inspired me with so much kindliness, curiosity, and repugnance. + +"At length I got to a place on the sea-coast, which I will not further +specify than to say that it is not many miles from Ballymacheen, on the +south shore. I have seen Venice and Naples, I have driven along the +Cornice Road, I have spent a month at our own Mount Desert, and I say +that all of them together are not so beautiful as this glowing, +deep-hued, soft-gleaming, silvery-lighted, ancient harbor and town, +with the tall hills crowding round it and the black cliffs and +headlands planting their iron feet in the blue, transparent sea. It is +a very old place, and has had a history which it has outlived ages +since. It may once have had two or three thousand inhabitants; it has +scarce five or six hundred to day. Half the houses are in ruins or have +disappeared; many of the remainder are standing empty. All the people +are poor, most of them abjectly so; they saunter about with bare feet +and uncovered heads, the women in quaint black or dark-blue cloaks, the +men in such anomalous attire as only an Irishman knows how to get +together, the children half naked. The only comfortable-looking people +are the monks and the priests, and the soldiers in the fort. For there +is a fort there, constructed on the huge ruins of one which may have +done duty in the reign of Edward the Black Prince, or earlier, in whose +mossy embrasures are mounted a couple of cannon, which occasionally +sent a practice-shot or two at the cliff on the other side of the +harbor. The garrison consists of a dozen men and three or four officers +and non-commissioned officers. I suppose they are relieved +occasionally, but those I saw seemed to have become component parts of +their surroundings. + +"I put up at a wonderful little old inn, the only one in the place, and +took my meals in a dining-saloon fifteen feet by nine, with a portrait +of George I (a print varnished to preserve it) hanging over the +mantel-piece. On the second evening after dinner a young gentleman came +in--the dining-saloon being public property of course--and ordered some +bread and cheese and a bottle of Dublin stout. We presently fell into +talk; he turned out to be an officer from the fort, Lieutenant +O'Connor, and a fine young specimen of the Irish soldier he was. After +telling me all he knew about the town, the surrounding country, his +friends, and himself, he intimated a readiness to sympathize with +whatever tale I might choose to pour into his ear; and I had pleasure +in trying to rival his own outspokenness. We became excellent friends; +we had up a half-pint of Kinahan's whisky, and the lieutenant expressed +himself in terms of high praise of my countrymen, my country, and my +own particular cigars. When it became time for him to depart I +accompanied him--for there was a splendid moon abroad--and bade him +farewell at the fort entrance, having promised to come over the next +day and make the acquaintance of the other fellows. 'And mind your eye, +now, going back, my dear boy,' he called out, as I turned my face +homeward. 'Faith, 'tis a spooky place, that graveyard, and you'll as +likely meet the black woman there as anywhere else!' + +"The graveyard was a forlorn and barren spot on the hill-side, just the +hither side of the fort: thirty or forty rough head-stones, few of +which retained any semblance of the perpendicular, while many were so +shattered and decayed as to seem nothing more than irregular natural +projections from the ground. Who the black woman might be I knew not, +and did not stay to inquire. I had never been subject to ghostly +apprehensions, and as a matter of fact, though the path I had to follow +was in places very bad going, not to mention a hap-hazard scramble over +a ruined bridge that covered a deep-lying brook, I reached my inn +without any adventure whatever. + +"The next day I kept my appointment at the fort, and found no reason to +regret it; and my friendly sentiments were abundantly reciprocated, +thanks more especially, perhaps, to the success of my banjo, which I +carried with me, and which was as novel as it was popular with those +who listened to it. The chief personages in the social circle besides +my friend the lieutenant were Major Molloy, who was in command, a racy +and juicy old campaigner, with a face like a sunset, and the surgeon, +Dr. Dudeen, a long, dry, humorous genius, with a wealth of anecdotical +and traditional lore at his command that I have never seen surpassed. +We had a jolly time of it, and it was the precursor of many more like +it. The remains of October slipped away rapidly, and I was obliged to +remember that I was a traveler in Europe, and not a resident in +Ireland. The major, the surgeon, and the lieutenant all protested +cordially against my proposed departure, but, as there was no help for +it, they arranged a farewell dinner to take place in the fort on +All-halloween. + +"I wish you could have been at that dinner with me! It was the essence +of Irish good-fellowship. Dr. Dudeen was in great force; the major was +better than the best of Lever's novels; the lieutenant was overflowing +with hearty good-humor, merry chaff, and sentimental rhapsodies anent +this or the other pretty girl of the neighborhood. For my part I made +the banjo ring as it had never rung before, and the others joined in +the chorus with a mellow strength of lungs such as you don't often hear +outside of Ireland. Among the stories that Dr. Dudeen regaled us with +was one about the Kern of Querin and his wife, Ethelind +Fionguala--which being interpreted signifies 'the white-shouldered.' +The lady, it appears, was originally betrothed to one O'Connor (here +the lieutenant smacked his lips), but was stolen away on the wedding +night by a party of vampires, who, it would seem, were at that period a +prominent feature among the troubles of Ireland. But as they were +bearing her along--she being unconscious--to that supper where she was +not to eat but to be eaten, the young Kern of Querin, who happened to +be out duck-shooting, met the party, and emptied his gun at it. The +vampires fled, and the Kern carried the fair lady, still in a state of +insensibility, to his house. 'And by the same token, Mr. Keningale,' +observed the doctor, knocking the ashes out of his pipe, 'ye're after +passing that very house on your way here. The one with the dark archway +underneath it, and the big mullioned window at the corner, ye +recollect, hanging over the street as I might say--' + +"'Go 'long wid the house, Dr. Dudeen, dear,' interrupted the +lieutenant; 'sure can't you see we're all dying to know what happened +to sweet Miss Fionguala, God be good to her, when I was after getting +her safe up-stairs--' + +"'Faith, then, I can tell ye that myself, Mr. O'Connor,' exclaimed the +major, imparting a rotary motion to the remnants of whisky in his +tumbler. ''Tis a question to be solved on general principles, as +Colonel O'Halloran said that time he was asked what he'd do if he'd +been the Book o' Wellington, and the Prussians hadn't come up in the +nick o' time at Waterloo. 'Faith,' says the colonel, 'I'll tell ye--' + +"'Arrah, then, major, why would ye be interruptin' the doctor, and Mr. +Keningale there lettin' his glass stay empty till he hears--The Lord +save us! the bottle's empty!' + +"In the excitement consequent upon this discovery, the thread of the +doctor's story was lost; and before it could be recovered the evening +had advanced so far that I felt obliged to withdraw. It took some time +to make my proposition heard and comprehended; and a still longer time +to put it in execution; so that it was fully midnight before I found +myself standing in the cool pure air outside the fort, with the +farewells of my boon companions ringing in my ears. + +"Considering that it had been rather a wet evening in-doors, I was in a +remarkably good state of preservation, and I therefore ascribed it +rather to the roughness of the road than to the smoothness of the +liquor, when, after advancing a few rods, I stumbled and fell. As I +picked myself up I fancied I had heard a laugh, and supposed that the +lieutenant, who had accompanied me to the gate, was making merry over +my mishap; but on looking round I saw that the gate was closed and no +one was visible. The laugh, moreover, had seemed to be close at hand, +and to be even pitched in a key that was rather feminine than +masculine. Of course I must have been deceived; nobody was near me: my +imagination had played me a trick, or else there was more truth than +poetry in the tradition that Halloween is the carnival-time of +disembodied spirits. It did not occur to me at the time that a stumble +is held by the superstitious Irish to be an evil omen, and had I +remembered it it would only have been to laugh at it. At all events, I +was physically none the worse for my fall, and I resumed my way +immediately. + +"But the path was singularly difficult to find, or rather the path I +was following did not seem to be the right one. I did not recognize it; +I could have sworn (except I knew the contrary) that I had never seen +it before. The moon had risen, though her light was as yet obscured by +clouds, but neither my immediate surroundings nor the general aspect of +the region appeared familiar. Dark, silent hill-sides mounted up on +either hand, and the road, for the most part, plunged downward, as if +to conduct me into the bowels of the earth. The place was alive with +strange echoes, so that at times I seemed to be walking through the +midst of muttering voices and mysterious whispers, and a wild, faint +sound of laughter seemed ever and anon to reverberate among the passes +of the hills. Currents of colder air sighing up through narrow defiles +and dark crevices touched my face as with airy fingers. A certain +feeling of anxiety and insecurity began to take possession of me, +though there was no definable cause for it, unless that I might be +belated in getting home. With the perverse instinct of those who are +lost I hastened my steps, but was impelled now and then to glance back +over my shoulder, with a sensation of being pursued. But no living +creature was in sight. The moon, however, had now risen higher, and the +clouds that were drifting slowly across the sky flung into the naked +valley dusky shadows, which occasionally assumed shapes that looked +like the vague semblance of gigantic human forms. + +"How long I had been hurrying onward I know not, when, with a kind of +suddenness, I found myself approaching a graveyard. It was situated on +the spur of a hill, and there was no fence around it, nor anything to +protect it from the incursions of passers-by. There was something in +the general appearance of this spot that made me half fancy I had seen +it before; and I should have taken it to be the same that I had often +noticed on my way to the fort, but that the latter was only a few +hundred yards distant therefrom, whereas I must have traversed several +miles at least. As I drew near, moreover, I observed that the +head-stones did not appear so ancient and decayed as those of the +other. But what chiefly attracted my attention was the figure that was +leaning or half sitting upon one of the largest of the upright slabs +near the road. It was a female figure draped in black, and a closer +inspection--for I was soon within a few yards of her--showed that she +wore the calla, or long hooded cloak, the most common as well as the +most ancient garment of Irish women, and doubtless of Spanish origin. + +"I was a trifle startled by this apparition, so unexpected as it was, +and so strange did it seem that any human creature should be at that +hour of the night in so desolate and sinister a place. Involuntarily I +paused as I came opposite her, and gazed at her intently. But the +moonlight fell behind her, and the deep hood of her cloak so completely +shadowed her face that I was unable to discern anything but the sparkle +of a pair of eyes, which appeared to be returning my gaze with much +vivacity. + +"'You seem to be at home here,' I said, at length. 'Can you tell me +where I am?' + +"Hereupon the mysterious personage broke into a light laugh, which, +though in itself musical and agreeable, was of a timbre and intonation +that caused my heart to beat rather faster than my late pedestrian +exertions warranted; for it was the identical laugh (or so my +imagination persuaded me) that had echoed in my ears as I arose from my +tumble an hour or two ago. For the rest, it was the laugh of a young +woman, and presumably of a pretty one; and yet it had a wild, airy, +mocking quality, that seemed hardly human at all, or not, at any rate, +characteristic of a being of affections and limitations like unto ours. +But this impression of mine was fostered, no doubt, by the unusual and +uncanny circumstances of the occasion. + +"'Sure, sir,' said she, 'you're at the grave of Ethelind Fionguala.' + +"As she spoke she rose to her feet, and pointed to the inscription on +the stone. I bent forward, and was able, without much difficulty, to +decipher the name, and a date which indicated that the occupant of the +grave must have entered the disembodied state between two and three +centuries ago. + +"'And who are you?' was my next question. + +"'I'm called Elsie,' she replied. 'But where would your honor be going +November-eve?' + +"I mentioned my destination, and asked her whether she could direct me +thither. + +"'Indeed, then, 'tis there I'm going myself,' Elsie replied; 'and if +your honor'll follow me, and play me a tune on the pretty instrument, +'tisn't long we'll be on the road.' + +"She pointed to the banjo which I carried wrapped up under my arm. How +she knew that it was a musical instrument I could not imagine; +possibly, I thought, she may have seen me playing on it as I strolled +about the environs of the town. Be that as it may, I offered no +opposition to the bargain, and further intimated that I would reward +her more substantially on our arrival. At that she laughed again, and +made a peculiar gesture with her hand above her head. I uncovered my +banjo, swept my fingers across the strings, and struck into a fantastic +dance-measure, to the music of which we proceeded along the path, Elsie +slightly in advance, her feet keeping time to the airy measure. In +fact, she trod so lightly, with an elastic, undulating movement, that +with a little more it seemed as if she might float onward like a +spirit. The extreme whiteness of her feet attracted my eye, and I was +surprised to find that instead of being bare, as I had supposed, these +were incased in white satin slippers quaintly embroidered with gold +thread. + +"'Elsie,' said I, lengthening my steps so as to come up with her, +'where do you live, and what do you do for a living?' + +"'Sure, I live by myself,' she answered; 'and if you'd be after knowing +how, you must come and see for yourself.' + +"'Are you in the habit of walking over the hills at night in shoes like +that?' + +"'And why would I not?' she asked, in her turn. 'And where did your +honor get the pretty gold ring on your finger?' + +"The ring, which was of no great intrinsic value, had struck my eye in +an old curiosity-shop in Cork. It was an antique of very old-fashioned +design, and might have belonged (as the vender assured me was the case) +to one of the early kings or queens of Ireland. + +"'Do you like it?' said I. + +"'Will your honor be after making a present of it to Elsie?' she +returned, with an insinuating tone and turn of the head. + +"'Maybe I will, Elsie, on one condition. I am an artist; I make +pictures of people. If you will promise to come to my studio and let me +paint your portrait, I'll give you the ring, and some money besides.' + +"'And will you give me the ring now?' said Elsie. + +"'Yes, if you'll promise.' + +"'And will you play the music to me?' she continued. + +"'As much as you like.' + +"'But maybe I'll not be handsome enough for ye,' said she, with a +glance of her eyes beneath the dark hood. + +"'I'll take the risk of that,' I answered, laughing, 'though, all the +same, I don't mind taking a peep beforehand to remember you by.' So +saying, I put forth a hand to draw back the concealing hood. But Elsie +eluded me, I scarce know how, and laughed a third time, with the same +airy, mocking cadence. + +"'Give me the ring first, and then you shall see me,' she said, +coaxingly. + +"'Stretch out your hand, then,' returned I, removing the ring from my +finger. 'When we are better acquainted, Elsie, you won't be so +suspicious.' + +"She held out a slender, delicate hand, on the forefinger of which I +slipped the ring. As I did so, the folds of her cloak fell a little +apart, affording me a glimpse of a white shoulder and of a dress that +seemed in that deceptive semi-darkness to be wrought of rich and costly +material; and I caught, too, or so I fancied, the frosty sparkle of +precious stones. + +"'Arrah, mind where ye tread!' said Elsie, in a sudden, sharp tone. + +"I looked round, and became aware for the first time that we were +standing near the middle of a ruined bridge which spanned a rapid +stream that flowed at a considerable depth below. The parapet of the +bridge on one side was broken down, and I must have been, in fact, in +imminent danger of stepping over into empty air. I made my way +cautiously across the decaying structure; but, when I turned to assist +Elsie, she was nowhere to be seen. + +"What had become of the girl? I called, but no answer came. I gazed +about on every side, but no trace of her was visible. Unless she had +plunged into the narrow abyss at my feet, there was no place where she +could have concealed herself--none at least that I could discover. She +had vanished, nevertheless; and since her disappearance must have been +premeditated, I finally came to the conclusion that it was useless to +attempt to find her. She would present herself again in her own good +time, or not at all. She had given me the slip very cleverly, and I +must make the best of it. The adventure was perhaps worth the ring. + +"On resuming my way, I was not a little relieved to find that I once +more knew where I was. The bridge that I had just crossed was none +other than the one I mentioned some time back; I was within a mile of +the town, and my way lay clear before me. The moon, moreover, had now +quite dispersed the clouds, and shone down with exquisite brilliance. +Whatever her other failings, Elsie had been a trustworthy guide; she +had brought me out of the depth of elf-land into the material world +again. It had been a singular adventure, certainly; and I mused over it +with a sense of mysterious pleasure as I sauntered along, humming +snatches of airs, and accompanying myself on the strings. Hark! what +light step was that behind me? It sounded like Elsie's; but no, Elsie +was not there. The same impression or hallucination, however, recurred +several times before I reached the outskirts of the town--the tread of +an airy foot behind or beside my own. The fancy did not make me +nervous; on the contrary, I was pleased with the notion of being thus +haunted, and gave myself up to a romantic and genial vein of reverie. + +"After passing one or two roofless and moss-grown cottages, I entered +the narrow and rambling street which leads through the town. This +street a short distance down widens a little, as if to afford the +wayfarer space to observe a remarkable old house that stands on the +northern side. The house was built of stone, and in a noble style of +architecture; it reminded me somewhat of certain palaces of the old +Italian nobility that I had seen on the Continent, and it may very +probably have been built by one of the Italian or Spanish immigrants of +the sixteenth or seventeenth century. The molding of the projecting +windows and arched doorway was richly carved, and upon the front of the +building was an escutcheon wrought in high relief, though I could not +make out the purport of the device. The moonlight falling upon this +picturesque pile enhanced all its beauties, and at the same time made +it seem like a vision that might dissolve away when the light ceased to +shine. I must often have seen the house before, and yet I retained no +definite recollection of it; I had never until now examined it with my +eyes open, so to speak. Leaning against the wall on the opposite side +of the street, I contemplated it for a long while at my leisure. The +window at the corner was really a very fine and massive affair. It +projected over the pavement below, throwing a heavy shadow aslant; the +frames of the diamond-paned lattices were heavily mullioned. How often +in past ages had that lattice been pushed open by some fair hand, +revealing to a lover waiting beneath in the moonlight the charming +countenance of his high-born mistress! Those were brave days. They had +passed away long since. The great house had stood empty for who could +tell how many years; only bats and vermin were its inhabitants. Where +now were those who had built it? and who were they? Probably the very +name of them was forgotten. + +"As I continued to stare upward, however, a conjecture presented itself +to my mind which rapidly ripened into a conviction. Was not this the +house that Dr. Dudeen had described that very evening as having been +formerly the abode of the Kern of Querin and his mysterious bride? +There was the projecting window, the arched doorway. Yes, beyond a +doubt this was the very house. I emitted a low exclamation of renewed +interest and pleasure, and my speculations took a still more +imaginative, but also a more definite turn. + +"What had been the fate of that lovely lady after the Kern had brought +her home insensible in his arms? Did she recover, and were they married +and made happy ever after; or had the sequel been a tragic one? I +remembered to have read that the victims of vampires generally became +vampires themselves. Then my thoughts went back to that grave on the +hill-side. Surely that was unconsecrated ground. Why had they buried +her there? Ethelind of the white shoulder! Ah! why had not I lived in +those days; or why might not some magic cause them to live again for +me? Then would I seek this street at midnight, and standing here +beneath her window, I would lightly touch the strings of my bandore +until the casement opened cautiously and she looked down. A sweet +vision indeed! And what prevented my realizing it? Only a matter of a +couple of centuries or so. And was time, then, at which poets and +philosophers sneer, so rigid and real a matter that a little faith and +imagination might not overcome it? At all events, I had my banjo, the +bandore's legitimate and lineal descendant, and the memory of Fionguala +should have the love-ditty. + +"Hereupon, having retuned the instrument, I launched forth into an old +Spanish love-song, which I had met with in some moldy library during my +travels, and had set to music of my own. I sang low, for the deserted +street re-echoed the lightest sound, and what I sang must reach only my +lady's ears. The words were warm with the fire of the ancient Spanish +chivalry, and I threw into their expression all the passion of the +lovers of romance. Surely Fionguala, the white-shouldered, would hear, +and awaken from her sleep of centuries, and come to the latticed +casement and look down! Hist! see yonder! What light--what shadow is +that that seems to flit from room to room within the abandoned house, +and now approaches the mullioned window? Are my eyes dazzled by the +play of the moonlight, or does the casement move--does it open? Nay, +this is no delusion; there is no error of the senses here. There is +simply a woman, young, beautiful, and richly attired, bending forward +from the window, and silently beckoning me to approach. + +"Too much amazed to be conscious of amazement, I advanced until I stood +directly beneath the casement, and the lady's face, as she stooped +toward me, was not more than twice a man's height from my own. She +smiled and kissed her finger-tips; something white fluttered in her +hand, then fell through the air to the ground at my feet. The next +moment she had withdrawn, and I heard the lattice close. I picked up +what she had let fall; it was a delicate lace handkerchief, tied to the +handle of an elaborately wrought bronze key. It was evidently the key +of the house, and invited me to enter. I loosened it from the +handkerchief, which bore a faint, delicious perfume, like the aroma of +flowers in an ancient garden, and turned to the arched doorway. I felt +no misgiving, and scarcely any sense of strangeness. All was as I had +wished it to be, and as it should be; the mediaeval age was alive once +more, and as for myself, I almost felt the velvet cloak hanging from my +shoulder and the long rapier dangling at my belt. Standing in front of +the door I thrust the key into the lock, turned it, and felt the bolt +yield. The next instant the door was opened, apparently from within; I +stepped across the threshold, the door closed again, and I was alone in +the house, and in darkness. + +"Not alone, however! As I extended my hand to grope my way it was met +by another hand, soft, slender, and cold, which insinuated itself +gently into mine and drew me forward. Forward I went, nothing loath; +the darkness was impenetrable, but I could hear the light rustle of a +dress close to me, and the same delicious perfume that had emanated +from the handkerchief enriched the air that I breathed, while the +little hand that clasped and was clasped by my own alternately +tightened and half relaxed the hold of its soft cold fingers. In this +manner, and treading lightly, we traversed what I presumed to be a +long, irregular passageway, and ascended a staircase. Then another +corridor, until finally we paused, a door opened, emitting a flood of +soft light, into which we entered, still hand in hand. The darkness and +the doubt were at an end. + +"The room was of imposing dimensions, and was furnished and decorated +in a style of antique splendor. The walls were draped with mellow hues +of tapestry; clusters of candles burned in polished silver sconces, and +were reflected and multiplied in tall mirrors placed in the four +corners of the room. The heavy beams of the dark oaken ceiling crossed +each other in squares, and were laboriously carved; the curtains and +the drapery of the chairs were of heavy-figured damask. At one end of +the room was a broad ottoman, and in front of it a table, on which was +set forth, in massive silver dishes, a sumptuous repast, with wines in +crystal beakers. At the side was a vast and deep fire-place, with space +enough on the broad hearth to burn whole trunks of trees. No fire, +however, was there, but only a great heap of dead embers; and the room, +for all its magnificence, was cold--cold as a tomb, or as my lady's +hand--and it sent a subtle chill creeping to my heart. + +"But my lady! how fair she was! I gave but a passing glance at the +room; my eyes and my thoughts were all for her. She was dressed in +white, like a bride; diamonds sparkled in her dark hair and on her +snowy bosom; her lovely face and slender lips were pale, and all the +paler for the dusky glow of her eyes. She gazed at me with a strange, +elusive smile; and yet there was, in her aspect and bearing, something +familiar in the midst of strangeness, like the burden of a song heard +long ago and recalled among other conditions and surroundings. It +seemed to me that something in me recognized her and knew her, had +known her always. She was the woman of whom I had dreamed, whom I had +beheld in visions, whose voice and face had haunted me from boyhood up. +Whether we had ever met before, as human beings meet, I knew not; +perhaps I had been blindly seeking her all over the world, and she had +been awaiting me in this splendid room, sitting by those dead embers +until all the warmth had gone out of her blood, only to be restored by +the heat with which my love might supply her. + +"'I thought you had forgotten me,' she said, nodding as if in answer to +my thought. 'The night was so late--our one night of the year! How my +heart rejoiced when I heard your dear voice singing the song I know so +well! Kiss me--my lips are cold!' + +"Cold indeed they were--cold as the lips of death. But the warmth of my +own seemed to revive them. They were now tinged with a faint color, and +in her cheeks also appeared a delicate shade of pink. She drew fuller +breath, as one who recovers from a long lethargy. Was it my life that +was feeding her? I was ready to give her all. She drew me to the table +and pointed to the viands and the wine. + +"'Eat and drink,' she said. 'You have traveled far, and you need food.' + +"'Will you eat and drink with me?' said I, pouring out the wine. + +"'You are the only nourishment I want,' was her answer.' This wine is +thin and cold. Give me wine as red as your blood and as warm, and I +will drain a goblet to the dregs.' + +"At these words, I know not why, a slight shiver passed through me. She +seemed to gain vitality and strength at every instant, but the chill of +the great room struck into me more and more. + +"She broke into a fantastic flow of spirits, clapping her hands, and +dancing about me like a child. Who was she? And was I myself, or was +she mocking mo when she implied that we had belonged to each other of +old? At length she stood still before me, crossing her hands over her +breast. I saw upon the forefinger of her right hand the gleam of an +antique ring. + +"'Where did you get that ring?' I demanded. + +"She shook her head and laughed. 'Have you been faithful?' she asked. +'It is my ring; it is the ring that unites us; it is the ring you gave +me when you loved me first. It is the ring of the Kern--the fairy ring, +and I am your Ethelind--Ethelind Fionguala.' + +"'So be it,' I said, casting aside all doubt and fear, and yielding +myself wholly to the spell of her inscrutable eyes and wooing lips. +'You are mine, and I am yours, and let us be happy while the hours +last.' + +"'You are mine, and I am yours,' she repeated, nodding her head with an +elfish smile. 'Come and sit beside me, and sing that sweet song again +that you sang to me so long ago. Ah, now I shall live a hundred years.' + +"We seated ourselves on the ottoman, and while she nestled luxuriously +among the cushions, I took my banjo and sang to her. The song and the +music resounded through the lofty room, and came back in throbbing +echoes. And before me as I sang I saw the face and form of Ethelind +Fionguala, in her jeweled bridal dress, gazing at me with burning eyes. +She was pale no longer, but ruddy and warm, and life was like a flame +within her. It was I who had become cold and bloodless, yet with the +last life that was in me I would have sung to her of love that can +never die. But at length my eyes grew dim, the room seemed to darken, +the form of Ethelind alternately brightened and waxed indistinct, like +the last flickerings of a fire; I swayed toward her, and felt myself +lapsing into unconsciousness, with my head resting on her white +shoulder." + +Here Keningale paused a few moments in his story, flung a fresh log +upon the fire, and then continued: + +"I awoke, I know not how long afterward. I was in a vast, empty room in +a ruined building. Rotten shreds of drapery depended from the walls, +and heavy festoons of spiders' webs gray with dust covered the windows, +which were destitute of glass or sash; they had been boarded up with +rough planks which had themselves become rotten with age, and admitted +through their holes and crevices pallid rays of light and chilly +draughts of air. A bat, disturbed by these rays or by my own movement, +detached himself from his hold on a remnant of moldy tapestry near me, +and after circling dizzily around my head, wheeled the flickering +noiselessness of his flight into a darker corner. As I arose unsteadily +from the heap of miscellaneous rubbish on which I had been lying, +something which had been resting across my knees fell to the floor with +a rattle. I picked it up, and found it to be my banjo--as you see it +now. + +"Well, that is all I have to tell. My health was seriously impaired; +all the blood seemed to have been drawn out of my veins; I was pale and +haggard, and the chill--Ah, that chill," murmured Keningale, drawing +nearer to the fire, and spreading out his hands to catch the warmth--"I +shall never get over it; I shall carry it to my grave." + + + + +"WHEN HALF-GODS GO, THE GODS ARRIVE." + + +"What a beautiful girl!" said Mr. Ambrose Drayton to himself; "and how +much she looks like--" He cut the comparison short, and turned his eyes +seaward, pulling at his mustache meditatively the while. + +"This American atmosphere, fresh and pure as it is in the nostrils, is +heavy-laden with reminiscences," his thoughts ran on. "Reminiscences, +but always with differences, the chief difference being, no doubt, in +myself. And no wonder. Nineteen years; yes, it's positively nineteen +years since I stood here and gazed out through yonder gap between the +headlands. Nineteen years of foreign lands, foreign men and manners, +the courts, the camps, the schools; adventure, business, and +pleasure--if I may lightly use so mysterious a word. Nineteen and +twenty are thirty-nine; in my case say sixty at least. Why, a girl like +that lovely young thing walking away there with her light step and her +innocent heart would take me to be sixty to a dead certainty. A rather +well-preserved man of sixty--that's how she'd describe me to the young +fellow she's given her heart to. Well, sixty or forty, what difference? +When a man has passed the age at which he falls in love, he is the peer +of Methuselah from that time forth. But what a fiery season that of +love is while it lasts! Ay, and it burns something out of the soul that +never grows again. And well that it should do so: a susceptible heart +is a troublesome burden to lug round the world. Curious that I should +be even thinking of such things: association, I suppose. Here it was +that we met and here we parted. But what a different place it was then! +A lovely cape, half bleak moorland and half shaggy wood, a few rocky +headlands and a great many coots and gulls, and one solitary old +farmhouse standing just where that spick-and-span summer hotel, with +its balconies and cupolas, stands now. So it was nineteen years ago, +and so it may be again, perhaps, nine hundred years hence; but +meanwhile, what a pretty array of modern aesthetic cottages, and plank +walks, and bridges, and bathing-houses, and pleasure-boats! And what an +admirable concourse of well-dressed and pleasurably inclined men and +women! After all, my countrymen are the finest-looking and most +prosperous-appearing people on the globe. They have traveled a little +faster than I have, and on a somewhat different track; but I would +rather be among them than anywhere else. Yes, I won't go back to +London, nor yet to Paris, or Calcutta, or Cairo. I'll buy a cottage +here at Squittig Point, and live and die here and in New York. I wonder +whether Mary is alive and mother of a dozen children, or--not!" + +"Auntie," said Miss Leithe to her relative, as they regained the +veranda of their cottage after their morning stroll on the beach, "who +was that gentleman who looked at us?" + +"Hey?--who?" inquired the widow of the late Mr. Corwin, absently. + +"The one in the thin gray suit and Panama hat; you must have seen him. +A very distinguished-looking man and yet very simple and pleasant; like +some of those nice middle-aged men that you see in 'Punch,' slenderly +built, with handsome chin and eyes, and thick mustache and whiskers. +Oh, auntie, why do you never notice things? I think a man between forty +and fifty is ever so much nicer than when they're younger. They know +how to be courteous, and they're not afraid of being natural. I mean +this one looks as if he would. But he must be somebody remarkable in +some way--don't you think so? There's something about him--something +graceful and gentle and refined and manly--that makes most other men +seem common beside him. Who do you suppose he can be?" + +"Who?--what have you been saying, my dear?" inquired Aunt Corwin, +rousing herself from the perusal of a letter. "Here's Sarah writes that +Frank Redmond was to sail from Havre the 20th; so he won't be here for +a week or ten days yet." + +"Well, he might not have come at all," said the girl, coloring +slightly. "I'm sure I didn't think he would, when he went away." + +"You are both of you a year older and wiser," said the widow, +meditatively; "and you have learned, I hope, not to irritate a man +needlessly. I never irritated Corwin in all my life. They don't +understand it." + +"Here comes Mr. Haymaker," observed Miss Leithe. "I shall ask him." + +"Don't ask him in," said Mrs. Corwin, retiring; "he chatters like an +organ-grinder." + +"Oh, good-morning, Miss Mary!" exclaimed Mr. Haymaker, as he mounted +the steps of the veranda, with his hands extended and his customary +effusion. "How charming you are looking after your bath and your walk +and all! Did you ever see such a charming morning? I never was at a +place I liked so much as Squittig Point; the new Newport, I call +it--eh? the new Newport. So fashionable already, and only been going, +as one might say, three or four years! Such charming people here! Oh, +by-the-way, whom do you think I ran across just now? You wouldn't know +him, though--been abroad since before you were born, I should think. +Most charming man I ever met, and awfully wealthy. Ran across him in +Europe--Paris, I think it was--stop! or was it Vienna? Well, never +mind. Drayton, that's his name; ever hear of him? Ambrose Drayton. Made +a great fortune in the tea-trade; or was it in the mines? I've +forgotten. Well, no matter. Great traveler, too--Africa and the Corea, +and all that sort of thing; and fought under Garibaldi, they say; and +he had the charge of some diplomatic affair at Pekin once. The +quietest, most gentlemanly fellow you ever saw. Oh, you must meet him. +He's come back to stay, and will probably spend the summer here. I'll +get him and introduce him. Oh, he'll be charmed--we all shall." + +"What sort of a looking person is he?" Miss Leithe inquired. + +"Oh, charming--just right! Trifle above medium height; rather lighter +weight than I am, but graceful; grayish hair, heavy mustache, blue +eyes; style of a retired English colonel, rather. You know what I +mean--trifle reticent, but charming manners. Stop! there he goes +now--see him? Just stopping to light a cigar--in a line with the +light-house. Now he's thrown away the match, and walking on again. +That's Ambrose Drayton. Introduce him on the sands this afternoon. How +is your good aunt to-day? So sorry not to have seen her! Well, I must +be off; awfully busy to-day. Good-by, my dear Miss Mary; see you this +afternoon. Good-by. Oh, make my compliments to your good aunt, won't +you? Thanks. So charmed! _Au revoir_." + +"Has that fool gone?" demanded a voice from within. + +"Yes, Auntie," the young lady answered. + +"Then come in to your dinner," the voice rejoined, accompanied by the +sound of a chair being drawn up to a table and sat down upon. Mary +Leithe, after casting a glance after the retreating figure of Mr. +Haymaker and another toward the light-house, passed slowly through the +wire-net doors and disappeared. + +Mr. Drayton had perforce engaged his accommodations at the hotel, all +the cottages being either private property or rented, and was likewise +constrained, therefore, to eat his dinner in public. But Mr. Drayton +was not a hater of his species, nor a fearer of it; and though he had +not acquired precisely our American habits and customs, he was disposed +to be as little strange to them as possible. Accordingly, when the gong +sounded, he entered the large dining-room with great intrepidity. The +arrangement of tables was not continuous, but many small tables, +capable of accommodating from two to six, were dotted about everywhere. +Mr. Drayton established himself at the smallest of them, situated in a +part of the room whence he had a view not only of the room itself, but +of the blue sea and yellow rocks on the other side. This preliminary +feat of generalship accomplished, he took a folded dollar bill from his +pocket and silently held it up in the air, the result being the speedy +capture of a waiter and the introduction of dinner. + +But at this juncture Mr. Haymaker came pitching into the room, as his +nature was, and pinned himself to a standstill, as it were, with his +eyeglass, in the central aisle of tables. Drayton at once gave himself +up for lost, and therefore received Mr. Haymaker with kindness and +serenity when, a minute or two later, he came plunging up, in his usual +ecstasy of sputtering amiability, and seated himself in the chair at +the other side of the table with an air as if everything were charming +in the most charming of all possible worlds, and he himself the most +charming person in it. + +"My dear Drayton, though," exclaimed Mr. Haymaker, in the interval +between the soup and the bluefish, "there is some one here you must +know--most charming girl you ever knew in your life, and has set her +heart on knowing you. We were talking about you this morning--Miss Mary +Leithe. Lovely name, too; pity ever to change it--he! he! he! Why, you +must have seen her about here; has an old aunt, widow of Jim Corwin, +who's dead and gone these five years. You recognize her, of course?" + +"Not as you describe her," said Mr. Drayton, helping his friend to fish. + +"Oh, the handsomest girl about here; tallish, wavy brown hair, soft +brown eyes, the loveliest-shaped eyes in the world, my dear fellow; +complexion like a Titian, figure slender yet, but promising. A way of +giving you her hand that makes you wish she would take your heart," +pursued Mr. Haymaker, impetuously filling his mouth with bluefish, +during the disposal of which he lost the thread of his harangue. +Drayton, however, seemed disposed to recover it for him. + +"Is this young lady from New England?" he inquired. + +"New-Yorker by birth," responded the ever-vivacious Haymaker; "father a +Southern man; mother a Bostonian. Father died eight or nine years after +marriage; mother survived him six years; girl left in care of old Mrs. +Corwin--good old creature, but vague--very vague. Don't fancy the +marriage was a very fortunate one; a little friction, more or less. +Leithe was rather a wild, unreliable sort of man; Mrs. Leithe a woman +not easily influenced--immensely charming, though, and all that, but a +trifle narrow and set. Well, you know, it was this way: Leithe was an +immensely wealthy man when she married him; lost his money, struggled +along, good deal of friction; Mrs. Leithe probably felt she had made a +mistake, and that sort of thing. But Miss Mary here, very different +style, looks like her mother, but softer; more in her, too. Very little +money, poor girl, but charming. Oh! you must know her." + +"What did you say her mother's maiden name was?" + +"Maiden name? Let me see. Why--oh, no--oh, yes--Cleveland, Mary +Cleveland." + +"Mary Cleveland, of Boston; married Hamilton Leithe, about nineteen +years ago. I used to know the lady. And this is her daughter! And Mary +Cleveland is dead!--Help yourself, Haymaker. I never take more than one +course at this hour of the day." + +"But you must let me introduce you, you know," mumbled Haymaker, +through his succotash. + +"I hardly know," said Drayton, rubbing his mustache. "Pardon me if I +leave you," he added, looking at his watch. "It is later than I +thought." + +Nothing more was seen of Drayton for the rest of that day. But the next +morning, as Mary Leithe sat on the Bowlder Rock, with a book on her +lap, and her eyes on the bathers, and her thoughts elsewhere, she heard +a light, leisurely tread behind her, and a gentlemanly, effective +figure made its appearance, carrying a malacca walking-stick, and a +small telescope in a leather case slung over the shoulder. + +"Good-morning, Miss Leithe," said this personage, in a quiet and +pleasant voice. "I knew your mother before you were born, and I can not +feel like a stranger toward her daughter. My name is Ambrose Drayton. +You look something like your mother, I think." + +"I think I remember mamma's having spoken of you," said Mary Leithe, +looking up a little shyly, but with a smile that was the most winning +of her many winning manifestations. Her upper lip, short, but somewhat +fuller than the lower one, was always alive with delicate movements; +the corners of her mouth were blunt, the teeth small; and the smile was +such as Psyche's might have been when Cupid waked her with a kiss. + +"It was here I first met your mother," continued Drayton, taking his +place beside her. "We often sat together on this very rock. I was a +young fellow then, scarcely older than you, and very full of romance +and enthusiasm. Your mother--". He paused a moment, looking at his +companion with a grave smile in his eyes. "If I had been as dear to her +as she was to me," he went on, "you would have been our daughter." + +Mary looked out upon the bathers, and upon the azure bay, and into her +own virgin heart. "Are you married, too?" she asked at length. + +"I was cut out for an old bachelor, and I have been true to my +destiny," was his reply. "Besides, I've lived abroad till a month or +two ago, and good Americans don't marry foreign wives." + +"I should like to go abroad," said Mary Leithe. + +"It is the privilege of Americans," said Drayton. "Other people are +born abroad, and never know the delight of real travel. But, after all, +America is best. The life of the world culminates here. We are the prow +of the vessel; there may be more comfort amidships, but we are the +first to touch the unknown seas. And the foremost men of all nations +are foremost only in so far as they are at heart American; that is to +say, America is, at present, even more an idea and a principle than it +is a country. The nation has perhaps not yet risen to the height of its +opportunities. So you have never crossed the Atlantic?" + +"No; my father never wanted to go; and after he died, mamma could not." + +"Well, our American Emerson says, you know, that, as the good of travel +respects only the mind, we need not depend for it on railways and +steamboats." + +"It seems to me, if we never moved ourselves, our minds would never +really move either." + +"Where would you most care to go?" + +"To Rome, and Jerusalem, and Egypt, and London." + +"Why?" + +"They seem like parts of my mind that I shall never know unless I visit +them." + +"Is there no part of the world that answers to your heart?" + +"Oh, the beautiful parts everywhere, I suppose." + +"I can well believe it," said Drayton, but with so much simplicity and +straightforwardness that Mary Leithe's cheeks scarcely changed color. +"And there is beauty enough here," he added, after a pause. + +"Yes; I have always liked this place," said she, "though the cottages +seem a pity." + +"You knew the old farm-house, then?" + +"Oh, yes; I used to play in the farm-yard when I was a little girl. +After my father died, Mamma used to come here every year. And my aunt +has a cottage here now. You haven't met my aunt, Mr. Drayton?" + +"I wished to know you first. But now I want to know her, and to become +one of the family. There is no one left, I find, who belongs to me. +What would you think of me for a bachelor uncle?" + +"I would like it very much," said Mary, with a smile. + +"Then let us begin," returned Drayton. + +Several days passed away very pleasantly. Never was there a bachelor +uncle so charming, as Haymaker would have said, as Drayton. The kind of +life in the midst of which he found himself was altogether novel and +delightful to him. In some aspects it was like enjoying for the first +time a part of his existence which he should have enjoyed in youth, but +had missed; and in many ways he doubtless enjoyed it more now than he +would have done then, for he brought it to a maturity of experience +which had taught him the inestimable value of simple things; a quiet +nobility of character and clearness of knowledge that enabled him to +perceive and follow the right course in small things as in great; a +serene yet cordial temperament that rendered him the cheerfulest and +most trustworthy of companions; a generous and masculine disposition, +as able to direct as to comply; and years which could sympathize +impartially with youth and age, and supply something which each lacked. +He, meanwhile, sometimes seemed to himself to be walking in a dream. +The region in which he was living, changed, yet so familiar, the +thought of being once more, after so many years of homeless wandering, +in his own land and among his own countrymen, and the companionship of +Mary Leithe, like, yet so unlike, the Mary Cleveland he had known and +loved, possessing in reality all the tenderness and lovely virginal +sweetness that he had imagined in the other, with a warmth of heart +that rejuvenated his own, and a depth and freshness of mind answering +to the wisdom that he had drawn from experience, and rendering her, +though in her different and feminine sphere, his equal--all these +things made Drayton feel as if he would either awake and find them the +phantasmagoria of a beautiful dream, or as if the past time were the +dream, and this the reality. Certainly, in this ardent, penetrating +light of the present, the past looked vaporous and dim, like a range of +mountains scaled long ago and vanishing on the horizon. + +And was this all? Doubtless it was, at first. It was natural that +Drayton should regard with peculiar tenderness the daughter of the +woman he had loved. She was an orphan, and poor; he was alone in the +world, with no one dependent upon him, and with wealth which could find +no better use than to afford this girl the opportunities and the +enjoyments which she else must lack. His anticipations in returning to +America had been somewhat cold and vague. It was his native land; but +abstract patriotism is, after all, rather chilly diet for a human being +to feed his heart upon. The unexpected apparition of Mary Leithe had +provided just that vividness and particularity that were wanting. +Insensibly Drayton bestowed upon her all the essence of the love of +country which he had cherished untainted throughout his long exile. It +was so much easier and simpler a thing to know and appreciate her than +to do as much for the United States and their fifty million +inhabitants, national, political, and social, that it is no wonder if +Drayton, as a modest and sane gentleman, preferred to make the former +the symbol of the latter--of all, at least, that was good and lovable +therein. At the same time, so clear-headed a man could scarcely have +failed to be aware that his affection for Mary Leithe was not actually +dependent upon the fact of her being an emblem. Upon what, then, was it +dependent? Upon her being the daughter of Mary Cleveland? It was true +that he had loved Mary Cleveland; but she had deliberately jilted him +to marry a wealthier man, and was therefore connected with and +responsible for the most painful as well as the most pleasurable +episode of his early life. Mary Leithe bore some personal resemblance +to her mother; but had she been as like her in character and +disposition as she was in figure and feature, would Drayton, knowing +what he knew, have felt drawn toward her? A man does not remain for +twenty years under the influence of an unreasonable and mistaken +passion. Drayton certainly had not, although his disappointment had +kept him a bachelor all his life, and altered the whole course of his +existence. But when we have once embarked upon a certain career, we +continue in it long after the motive which started us has been +forgotten. No; Drayton's regard for Mary Leithe must stand on its own +basis, independent of all other considerations. + +What, in the next place, was the nature of this regard? Was it merely +avuncular, or something different? Drayton assured himself that it was +the former. He was a man of the world, and had done with passions. The +idea of his falling in love made him smile in a deprecatory manner. +That the object of such love should be a girl eighteen years his junior +rendered the suggestion yet more irrational. She was lustrous with +lovable qualities, which he genially recognized and appreciated; nay, +he might love her, but the love would be a quasi-paternal one, not the +love that demands absolute possession and brooks no rivalry. His +attitude was contemplative and beneficent, not selfish and exclusive. +His greatest pleasure would be to see her married to some one worthy of +her. Meantime he might devote himself to her freely and without fear. + +And yet, once again, was he not the dupe of himself and of a +convention? Was his the mood in which an uncle studies his niece, or +even a father his daughter? How often during the day was she absent +from his thoughts, or from his dreams at night? What else gave him so +much happiness as to please her, and what would he not do to give her +pleasure? Why was he dissatisfied and aimless when not in her presence? +Why so full-orbed and complete when she was near? He was eighteen years +the elder, but there was in her a fullness of nature, a balanced +development, which went far toward annulling the discrepancy. Moreover, +though she was young, he was not old, and surely he had the knowledge, +the resources, and the will to make her life happy. There would be, he +fancied, a certain poetical justice in such an issue. It would +illustrate the slow, seemingly severe, but really tender wisdom of +Providence. Out of the very ashes of his dead hopes would arise this +gracious flower of promise. She would afford him scope for the +employment of all those riches, moral and material, which life had +brought him; she would be his reward for having lived honorably and +purely for purity's and honor's sake. But why multiply reasons? There +was justification enough; and true love knows nothing of justification. +He loved her, then; and now, did she love him? This was the real +problem--the mystery of a maiden's heart, which all Solomon's wisdom +and Bacon's logic fail to elucidate. Drayton did what he could. Once he +came to her with the news that he must be absent from an excursion +which they had planned, and he saw genuine disappointment darken her +sweet face, and her slender figure seem to droop. This was well as far +as it went, but beyond that it proved nothing. Another time he gave her +a curious little shell which he had picked up while they were rambling +together along the beach, and some time afterward he accidently noticed +that she was wearing it by a ribbon round her neck. This seemed better. +Again, on a night when there was a social gathering at the hotel, he +entered the room and sat apart at one of the windows, and as long as he +remained there he felt that her gaze was upon him, and twice or thrice +when he raised his eyes they were met by hers, and she smiled; and +afterward, when he was speaking near her, he noticed that she +disregarded what her companion of the moment was saying to her, and +listened only to him. Was not all this encouragement? Nevertheless, +whenever, presuming upon this, he hazarded less ambiguous +demonstrations, she seemed to shrink back and appear strange and +troubled. This behavior perplexed him; he doubted the evidence that had +given him hope; feared that he was a fool; that she divined his love, +and pitied him, and would have him, if at all, only out of pity. +Thereupon he took himself sternly to task, and resolved to give her up. + +It was a transparent July afternoon, with white and gray clouds +drifting across a clear blue sky, and a southwesterly breeze roughening +the dark waves and showing their white shoulders. Mary Leithe and +Drayton came slowly along the rocks, he assisting her to climb or +descend the more rugged places, and occasionally pausing with her to +watch the white canvas of a yacht shiver in the breeze as she went +about, or to question whether yonder flash amid the waves, where the +gulls were hovering and dipping, were a bluefish breaking water. At +length they reached a little nook in the seaward face, which, by often +resorting to it, they had in a manner made their own. It was a small +shelf in the rock, spacious enough for two to sit in at ease, with a +back to lean against, and at one side a bit of level ledge which served +as a stand or table. Before them was the sea, which, at high-water +mark, rose to within three yards of their feet; while from the +shoreward side they were concealed by the ascending wall of sandstone. +Drayton had brought a cushion with him, which he arranged in Mary's +seat; and when they had established themselves, he took a volume of +Emerson's poems from his pocket and laid it on the rock beside him. + +"Are you comfortable?" he asked. + +"Yes; I wish it would be always like this--the weather, and the sun, +and the time--so that we might stay here forever." + +"Forever is the least useful word in human language," observed Drayton. +"In the perspective of time, a few hours, or days, or years, seem alike +inconsiderable." + +"But it is not the same to our hearts, which live forever," she +returned. + +"The life of the heart is love," said Drayton. + +"And that lasts forever," said Mary Leithe. + +"True love lasts, but the object changes," was his reply. + +"It seems to change sometimes," said she. + +"But I think it is only our perception that is misled. We think we have +found what we love; but afterward, perhaps, we find it was not in the +person we supposed, but in some other. Then we love it in him; not +because our heart has changed, but just because it has not." + +"Has that been your experience?" Drayton asked, with a smile. + +"Oh, I was speaking generally," she said, looking down. + +"It may be the truth; but if so, it is a perilous thing to be loved." + +"Perilous?" + +"Why, yes. How can the lover be sure that he really is what his +mistress takes him for? After all, a man has and is nothing in himself. +His life, his love, his goodness, such as they are, flow into him from +his Creator, in such measure as he is capable or desirous of receiving +them. And he may receive more at one time than at another. How shall he +know when he may lose the talismanic virtue that won her love--even +supposing he ever possessed it?" + +"I don't know how to argue," said Mary Leithe; "I can only feel when a +thing is true or not--or when I think it is--and say what I feel." + +"Well, I am wise enough to trust the truth of your feeling before any +argument." + +This assertion somewhat disconcerted Mary Leithe, who never liked to be +confronted with her own shadow, so to speak. However, she seemed +resolved on this occasion to give fuller utterance than usual to what +was in her mind; so, after a pause, she continued, "It is not only how +much we are capable of receiving from God, but the peculiar way in +which each one of us shows what is in him, that makes the difference in +people. It is not the talisman so much as the manner of using it that +wins a girl's love. And she may think one manner good until she comes +to know that another is better." + +"And, later, that another is better still?" + +"You trust my feeling less than you thought, you see," said Mary, +blushing, and with a tremor of her lips. + +"Perhaps I am afraid of trusting it too much," Drayton replied, fixing +his eyes upon her. Then he went on, with a changed tone and manner: +"This metaphysical discussion of ours reminds me of one of Emerson's +poems, whose book, by-the-by, I brought with me. Have you ever read +them?" + +"Very few of them," said Mary; "I don't seem to belong to them." + +"Not many people can eat them raw, I imagine," rejoined Drayton, +laughing. "They must be masticated by the mind before they can nourish +the heart, and some of them--However, the one I am thinking of is very +beautiful, take it how you will. It is called, 'Give all to Love.' Do +you know it!" + +Mary shook her head. + +"Then listen to it," said Drayton, and he read the poem to her. "What +do you think of it?" he asked when he had ended. + +"It is very short," said Mary, "and it is certainly beautiful; but I +don't understand some parts of it, and I don't think I like some other +parts." + +"It is a true poem," returned Drayton; "it has a body and a soul; the +body is beautiful, but the soul is more beautiful still; and where the +body seems incomplete, the soul is most nearly perfect. Be loyal, it +says, to the highest good you know; follow it through all difficulties +and dangers; make it the core of your heart and the life of your soul; +and yet, be free of it! For the hour may always be at hand when that +good that you have lived for and lived in must be given up. And +then--what says the poet? + + "'Though thou loved her as thyself, + As a self of purer clay, + Though her parting dims the day, + Stealing grace from all alive, + Heartily know, + When half-gods go, + The gods arrive.'" + +There was something ominous in Drayton's tone, quiet and pleasant +though it sounded to the ear, and Mary could not speak; she knew that +he would speak again, and that his words would bring the issue finally +before her. + +He shut the book and put it in his pocket. For some time he remained +silent, gazing eastward across the waves, which came from afar to break +against the rock at their feet. A small white pyramidal object stood up +against the horizon verge, and upon this Drayton's attention appeared +to be concentrated. + +"If you should ever decide to come," he said at length, "and want the +services of a courier who knows the ground well, I shall be at your +disposal." + +"Come where?" she said, falteringly. + +"Eastward. To Europe." + +"You will go with me?" + +"Hardly that. But I shall be there to receive you." + +"You are going back?" + +"In a month, or thereabouts." + +"Oh, Mr. Drayton! Why?" + +"Well, for several reasons. My coming here was an experiment. It might +have succeeded, but it was made too late. I am too old for this young +country. I love it, but I can be of no service to it. On the contrary, +so far as I was anything, I should be in the way. It does not need me, +and I have been an exile so long as to have lost my right to inflict +myself upon it. Yet I am glad to have been here; the little time that I +have been here has recompensed me for all the sorrows of my life, and I +shall never forget an hour of it as long as I live." + +"Are you quite sure that your country does not want you--need you?" + +"I should not like my assurance to be made more sure." + +"How can you know? Who has told you? Whom have you asked?" + +"There are some questions which it is not wise to put; questions whose +answers may seem ungracious to give, and are sad to hear." + +"But the answer might not seem so. And how can it be given until you +ask it?" + +Drayton turned and looked at her. His face was losing its resolute +composure, and there was a glow in his eyes and in his cheeks that +called up an answering warmth in her own. + +"Do you know where my country is?" he demanded, almost sternly. + +"It is where you are loved and wanted most, is it not?" she said, +breathlessly. + +"Do not deceive yourself--nor me!" exclaimed Drayton, putting out his +hand toward her, and half rising from the rock. "There is only one +thing more to say." + +A sea-gull flew close by them, and swept on, and in a moment was far +away, and lost to sight. So in our lives does happiness come so near us +as almost to brush our cheeks with its wings, and then pass on, and +become as unattainable as the stars. As Mary Leithe was about to speak, +a shadow cast from above fell across her face and figure. She seemed to +feel a sort of chill from it, warm though the day was; and without +moving her eyes from Drayton's face to see whence the shadow came, her +expression underwent a subtle and sudden change, losing the fervor of a +moment before, and becoming relaxed and dismayed. But after a moment +Drayton looked up, and immediately rose to his feet, exclaiming, "Frank +Redmond!" + +On the rock just above them stood a young man, dark of complexion, with +eager eyes, and a figure athletic and strong. As Drayton spoke his +name, his countenance assumed an expression half-way between pleased +surprise and jealous suspicion. Meanwhile Mary Leithe had covered her +face with her hands. + +"I'm sure I'd no idea you were here, Mr. Drayton," said the young man. +"I was looking for Mary Leithe. Is that she?" + +Mary uncovered her face, and rose to her feet languidly. She did not as +yet look toward Redmond, but she said in a low voice, "How do you do, +Frank? You--came so suddenly!" + +"I didn't stop to think--that I might interrupt you," said he, drawing +back a little and lifting his head. + +Drayton had been observing the two intently, breathing constrainedly +the while, and grasping a jutting point of rock with his hand as he +stood. He now said, in a genial and matter-of-fact voice, "Well, Master +Frank, I shall have an account to settle with you when you and my niece +have got through your first greetings." + +"Mary your niece!" cried Redmond, bewildered. + +"My niece by courtesy; her mother was a dear friend of mine before Mary +was born. And now it appears that she is the young lady, the dearest +and loveliest ever heard of, about whom you used to rhapsodize to me in +Dresden! Why didn't you tell me her name? By Jove, you young rogue, +I've a good mind to refuse my consent to the match! What if I had +married her off to some other young fellow, and you been left in the +lurch! However, luckily for you, I haven't been able thus far to find +any one who in my opinion--How do you do, Frank? You--came so suddenly!" + +"I didn't stop to think--that I might interrupt you," said he, drawing +back a little and lifting his head. + +Drayton had been observing the two intently, breathing constrainedly +the while, and grasping a jutting point of rock with his hand as he +stood. He now said, in a genial and matter-of-fact voice, "Well, Master +Frank, I shall have an account to settle with you when you and my niece +have got through your first greetings." + +"Mary your niece!" cried Redmond, bewildered. + +"My niece by courtesy; her mother was a dear friend of mine before Mary +was born. And now it appears that she is the young lady, the dearest +and loveliest ever heard of, about whom you used to rhapsodize to me in +Dresden! Why didn't you tell me her name? By Jove, you young rogue, +I've a good mind to refuse my consent to the match! What if I had +married her off to some other young fellow, and you been left in the +lurch! However, luckily for you, I haven't been able thus far to find +any one who in my opinion would suit her better. Come down here and +shake hands, Frank, and then I'll leave you to make your excuses to +Miss Leithe. And the next time you come back to her after a year's +absence, don't frighten her heart into her mouth by springing out on +her like a jack-in-the-box. Send a bunch of flowers or a signet-ring to +tell her you are coming, or you may get a cooler reception than you'd +like!" + +"Ah! Ambrose Drayton," he sighed to himself as he clambered down the +rocks alone, and sauntered along the shore, "there is no fool like an +old fool. Where were your eyes that you couldn't have seen what was the +matter? Her heart was fighting against itself all the time, poor child! +And you, selfish brute, bringing to bear on her all your antiquated +charms and fascinations--Heaven save the mark!--and bullying her into +the belief that you could make her happy! Thank God, Ambrose Drayton, +that your awakening did not come too late. A minute more would have +made her and you miserable for life--and Redmond too, confound him! And +yet they might have told me; one of them might have told me, surely. +Even at my age it is hard to remember one's own insignificance. And I +did love her! God knows how I loved her! I hope he loves her as much; +but how can he help it! And she--she won't remember long! An old fellow +who made believe he was her uncle, and made rather a fool of himself; +went back to Europe, and never been heard of since. Ah, me!" + +"Where did you get acquainted with Mr. Drayton, Frank?" + +"At Dresden. It was during the vacation at Freiberg last winter, and I +had come over to Dresden to have a good time. We stayed at the same +hotel. We played a game of billiards together, and he chatted with me +about America, and asked me about my mining studies at Freiberg; and I +thought him about the best fellow I'd ever met. But I didn't know +then--I hadn't any conception what a splendid fellow he really was. If +ever I hear anybody talking of their ideal of a gentleman, I shall ask +them if they ever met Ambrose Drayton." + +"What did he do?" + +"Well, the story isn't much to my credit; if it hadn't been for him, +you might never have heard of me again; and it will serve me right to +confess the whole thing to you. It's about a--woman." + +"What sort of a woman?" + +"She called herself a countess; but there's no telling what she really +was. I only know she got me into a fearful scrape, and if it hadn't +been for Mr. Drayton--" + +"Did you do anything wrong, Frank?" + +"No; upon my honor as a gentleman! If I had, Mary, I wouldn't be here +now." + +Mary looked at him with a sad face. "Of course I believe you, Frank," +she said. "But I think I would rather not hear any more about it." + +"Well, I'll only tell you what Mr. Drayton did. I told him all about +it--how it began, and how it went on, and all; and how I was engaged to +a girl in America--I didn't tell him your name; and I wasn't sure, +then, whether you'd ever marry me, after all; because, you know, you +had been awfully angry with me before I went away, because I wanted to +study in Europe instead of staying at home. But, you see, I've got my +diploma, and that'll give me a better start than I ever should have had +if I'd only studied here. However--what was I saying? Oh! so he said he +would find out about the countess, and talk to her himself. And how he +managed I don't know; and he gave me a tremendous hauling over the +coals for having been such an idiot; but it seems that instead of being +a poor injured, deceived creature, with a broken heart, and all that +sort of thing, she was a regular adventuress--an old hand at it, and +had got lots of money out of other fellows for fear she would make a +row. But Mr. Drayton had an interview with her. I was there, and I +never shall forget it if I live to a hundred. You never saw anybody so +quiet, so courteous, so resolute, and so immitigably stern as he was. +And yet he seemed to be stern only against the wrong she was trying to +do, and to be feeling kindness and compassion for her all the time. She +tried everything she knew, but it wasn't a bit of use, and at last she +broke down and cried, and carried on like a child. Then Mr. Drayton +took her out of the room, and I don't know what happened, but I've +always suspected that he sent her off with money enough in her pocket +to become an honest woman with if she chose to; but he never would +admit it to me. He came back to me after a while, and told me to have +nothing more to do with any woman, good or bad except the woman I meant +to marry, and I promised him I wouldn't, and I kept my promise. But we +have him to thank for our happiness, Mary." + +Tears came silently into Mary's eyes; she said nothing, but sat with +her hands clasped around one knee, gazing seaward. + +"You don't seem very happy, though," pursued Redmond, after a pause; +"and you acted so oddly when I first found you and Mr. Drayton +together--I almost thought--well, I didn't know what to think. You do +love me, don't you?" + +For a few moments Mary Leithe sat quite motionless, save for a slight +tremor of the nerves that pervaded her whole body; and then, all at +once, she melted into sobs. Redmond could not imagine what was the +matter with her; but he put his arms round her, and after a little +hesitation or resistance, the girl hid her face upon his shoulder, and +wept for the secret that she would never tell. + +But Mary Leithe's nature was not a stubborn one, and easily adapted +itself to the influences with which she was most closely in contact. +When she and Redmond presented themselves at Aunt Corwin's cottage that +evening her tears were dried, and only a tender dimness of the eyes and +a droop of her sweet mouth betrayed that she had shed any. + +"Mr. Drayton wanted to be remembered to you, Mary," observed Aunt +Corwin, shortly before going to bed. She had been floating colored +sea-weeds on paper all the time since supper, and had scarcely spoken a +dozen words. + +"Has he gone?" Mary asked. + +"Who? Oh, yes; he had a telegram, I believe. His trunks were to follow +him. He said he would write. I liked that man. He was not like Mr. +Haymaker; he was a gentleman. He took an interest in my collections, +and gave me several nice specimens. Your mother was a fool not to have +married him. I wish you could have married him yourself. But it was not +to be expected that he would care for a child like you, even if your +head were not turned by that Frank Redmond. How soon shall you let him +marry you?" + +"Whenever he likes," answered Mary Leithe, turning away. + +As a matter of fact, they were married the following winter. A week +before the ceremony a letter arrived for Mary from New York, addressed +in a legal hand. It contained an intimation that, in accordance with +the instructions of their client, Mr. Ambrose Drayton, the undersigned +had placed to her account the sum of fifty thousand dollars as a +preliminary bequest, it being the intention of Mr. Drayton to make her +his heir. There was an inclosure from Drayton himself, which Mary, +after a moment's hesitation, placed in her lover's hand, and bade him +break the seal. + +It contained only a few lines, wishing happiness to the bride and +bridegroom, and hoping they all might meet in Europe, should the +wedding trip extend so far. "And as for you, my dear niece," continued +the writer, "whenever you think of me remember that little poem of +Emerson's that we read on the rocks the last time I saw you. The longer +I live the more of truth do I find in it, especially in the last verse: + + "'Heartily know, + When half-gods go, + The gods arrive!'" + +"What does that mean?" demanded Redmond, looking up from the letter. + +"We can not know except by experience," answered Mary Leithe. + + + + +"SET NOT THY FOOT ON GRAVES." + + +_New York_, _April 29th_.--Last night I came upon this passage in my +old author: "Friend, take it sadly home to thee--Age and Youthe are +strangers still. Youthe, being ignorant of the wisdome of Age, which is +Experience, but wise with its own wisdome, which is of the unshackeled +Soule, or Intuition, is great in Enterprise, but slack in Achievement. +Holding itself equal to all attempts and conditions, and to be heir, +not of its own spanne of yeares and compasse of Faculties only, but of +all time and all Human Nature--such, I saye, being its illusion (if, +indeede, it be illusion, and not in some sorte a Truth), it still +underrateth the value of Opportunitie, and, in the vain beleefe that +the City of its Expectation is paved with Golde and walled with +Precious Stones, letteth slip betwixt its fingers those diamondes and +treasures which ironical Fate offereth it.... But see nowe what the +case is when this youthe becometh in yeares. For nowe he can nowise +understand what defecte of Judgmente (or effecte of insanitie rather) +did leade him so to despise and, as it were, reject those Giftes and +golden chaunces which come but once to mortal men. Experience (that +saturnine Pedagogue) hath taught him what manner of man he is, and +that, farre from enjoying that Deceptive Seeminge or mirage of Freedome +which would persuade him that he may run hither and thither as the whim +prompteth over the face of the Earthe--yea, take the wings of the +morninge and winnowe his aerie way to the Pleiadies--he must e'en plod +heavilie and with paine along that single and narrowe Path whereto the +limitations of his personal nature and profession confine him--happy if +he arrive with muche diligence and faire credit at the ende thereof, +and falle not ignobly by the way. Neverthelesse--for so great is the +infatuation of man, who, although he acquireth all other knowledge, yet +arriveth not at the knowledge of Himself--if to the Sage of Experience +he proffered once again the gauds and prizes of youthe, which he hath +ever since regretted and longed for--what doeth he in his wisdome? +Verilie, so longe as the matter remaineth _in nubibis_, as the Latins +say, or in the Region of the Imagination, as oure speeche hath it, he +will beleeve, yea, take his oathe, that he still is master of all those +capacities and energies whiche, in his youthe, would have prompted and +enabled him to profit by this desired occurrence. Yet shall it appeare +(if the thinge be brought still further to the teste, and, from an +Imagination or Dreame, become an actual Realitie), that he will shrinke +from and decline that which he did erste so ardently sigh for and +covet. And the reason of this is as follows, to-wit: That Habit or +Custome hath brought him more to love and affect those very ways and +conditions of life, yea, those inconveniences and deficiencies which he +useth to deplore and abhorre, than that Crown of Golde or Jewel of +Happiness whose withholding he hath all his life lamented. Hence we may +learne, that what is past, is dead, and that though thoughts be free, +nature is ever captive, and loveth her chaine." + +This is too lugubrious and cynical not to have some truth in it; but I +am unwilling to believe that more than half of it is true. The author +himself was evidently an old man, and therefore a prejudiced judge; and +he did not make allowances for the range and variety of temperament. +Age is not a matter of years, and scarcely of experience. The only +really old persons are the selfish ones. The man whose thoughts, +actions, and affections center upon himself, soon acquires a fixity and +crustiness which (if to be old is to be "strange to youth") is old as +nothing else is. But the man who makes the welfare and happiness of +others his happiness, is as young at threescore as he was at twenty, +and perhaps even younger, for he has had no time to grow old. + +_April 30th_.--The Courtneys are in town! This is, I believe, her first +visit to America since he married her. At all events, I have not seen +or heard of her in all these seven years. I wonder ... I was going to +write, I wonder whether she remembers me. Of course she remembers me, +in a sort of way. I am tied up somewhere among her bundle of +recollections, and occasionally, in an idle moment, her eye falls upon +me, and moves her, perhaps, to smile or to sigh. For my own part, in +thinking over our old days, I find I forget her less than I had +supposed. Probably she has been more or less consciously in my mind +throughout. In the same way, one has always latent within him the +knowledge that he must die; but it does not follow that he is +continually musing on the thought of death. As with death, so with this +old love of mine. What a difference, if we had married! She was a very +lovely girl--at least, I thought so then. Very likely I should not +think her so now. My taste and knowledge have developed; a different +order of things interests me. It may not be an altogether pleasant +thing to confess; but, knowing myself as I now do, I have often thanked +my stars that I am a bachelor. + +Doubtless she is even more changed than I am. A woman changes more than +a man in seven years, and a married woman especially must change a +great deal from twenty-two to twenty-nine. Think of Ethel Leigh being +in her thirtieth year! and the mother of four or five children, +perhaps. Well, for the matter of that, think of the romantic and +ambitious young Claude Campbell being an old bachelor of forty! I have +married Art instead of Ethel, and she, instead of being Mrs. Campbell, +is Mrs. Courtney. + +It was a surprising thing--her marrying him so suddenly. But, +appearances to the contrary notwithstanding, I have never quite made up +my mind that Ethel was really fickle. She did it out of pique, or +pride, or impulse, or whatever it is that sways women in such cases. +She was angry, or indignant--how like fire and ice at once she was when +she was angry!--and she was resolved to show me that she could do +without me. She would not listen to my explanations; and I was always +awkward and stiff about making explanations. Besides, it was not an +easy matter to explain, especially to a girl like her. With a married +woman or a widow it would have been a simple thing enough. But Ethel +Leigh, the minister's daughter--innocent, ignorant, passionate--she +would tolerate nothing short of a public disavowal and discontinuance +of my relations with Mrs. Murray, and that, of course, I could not +consent to, though heaven knows (and so must Ethel, by this time) that +Mrs. Murray was nothing to me save as she was the wife of my friend, +during whose enforced absence I was bound to look after her, to some +extent. It was not my fault that poor Mrs. Murray was a fool. But such +are the trumpery seeds from which tragedies grow. Not that ours was a +tragedy, exactly: Ethel married her English admirer, and I became a +somewhat distinguished artist, that is all. I wonder whether she has +been happy! Likely enough; she was born to be wealthy; Englishmen make +good husbands sometimes, and her London life must have been a brilliant +one.... I have been looking at my old photograph of her--the one she +gave me the morning after we were engaged. Tall, slender, dark, with +level brows, and the bearing of a Diana. She certainly was handsome, +and I shall not run the risk of spoiling this fine memory by calling on +her. Even if she have not deteriorated, she can scarcely have improved. +Nay, even were she the same now as then, I should not find her so, +because of the change in myself. Why should I blink the truth? +Experience, culture, and the sober second thought of middle age have +carried me far beyond the point where I could any longer be in sympathy +with this crude, thin-skinned, impulsive girl. And then--four or five +children! Decidedly, I will give her a wide berth. And Courtney +himself, with his big beard, small brain, and obtrusive laugh! I shall +step across to California for a few months. + +_May 1st_.--Called this morning on Ethel Leigh--Mrs. Deighton Courtney, +that is to say. She is not so much changed, but she has certainly +improved. When I say she has not changed much, I refer to her physical +appearance. Her features are scarcely altered; her figure is a little +fuller and more compact; in her bearing there is a certain quiet +composure and self-possession--the air of a woman who has seen the +world, has received admiration, and is familiar with the graceful +little arts of social intercourse. In short, she has acquired a high +external polish; and that is precisely what she most needed. Evidently, +too, there is an increased mental refinement corresponding to the +outward manner. She has mellowed, sweetened--whether deepened or not I +should hesitate to affirm. But I am quite sure that I find her more +charming to talk with, more supple in intercourse, more fascinating, in +a word, than formerly. We chatted discursively and rather volubly for +more than an hour; yet we did not touch on anything very serious or +profound. They are staying at the Brevoort House. Courtney himself, +by-the-by, is still in Boston (they landed there), where business will +detain him a few days. Ethel goes on a house-hunting expedition +to-morrow, and I am going with her; for New York has altered out of her +recollection during these seven years. They are to remain here three +years, perhaps longer. Courtney is to establish and oversee an American +branch of his English business. + +They have only one child--a pretty little thing: Susie and I became +great friends. + +Mrs. Courtney opened the door of the private sitting-room in which I +was awaiting her, and came in--beautifully! She has learned how to do +that since I knew her. My own long residence in Paris has made me more +critical than I used to be in such matters; but I do not remember +having met any woman in society with manners more nearly perfect than +Mrs. Courtney's. Ethel Leigh used to be, upon occasion, painfully +abrupt and disconcerting; and her movements and attitudes, though there +was abundant native grace in them, were often careless and +unconventional. Of course, I do not forget that niceties of deportment, +without sound qualities of mind and heart to back them, are of trifling +value; but the two kinds of attraction are by no means incompatible +with each other. Mrs. Courtney smiles often. Ethel Leigh used to smile +rarely, although, when the smile did come, it was irresistibly winning; +there was in it exquisite significance and tenderness. It is a +beautiful smile still, but that charm of rarity (if it be a charm) is +lacking. It is a conventional smile more than a spontaneous or a happy +one; indeed, it led me to surmise that she had perhaps not been very +happy since we last met, and had learned to use this smile as a sort of +veil. Not that I suppose for a moment that Courtney has ill-treated +her. I never could see anything in the man beyond a superficial +comeliness, a talent for business, and an affable temper; but ho was +not in any sense a bad fellow. Besides, he was over head and ears in +love with her; and Ethel would be sure to have the upper hand of a +nature like his. No, her unhappiness, if she be unhappy, would be due +to no such cause, she and her husband are no doubt on good terms with +each other. But--suppose she has discovered that he fell short of what +she demanded in a husband; that she overmatched him; that, in order to +make their life smooth, she must descend to him? I imagine it may be +something of that kind. Poor Mrs. Courtney! + +She addressed me as "Mr. Campbell," and I dare say she was right. Women +best know how to meet these situations. To have called me "Claude" +would have placed us in a false position, by ignoring the changes that +have taken place. It is wise to respect these barriers; they are +conventional, but, rightly considered, they are more of an assistance +than of an obstacle to freedom of intercourse. I asked her how she +liked England. She smiled and said, "It was my business to like +England; still, I am glad to see America once more." + +"You will entertain a great deal, I presume--that sort of thing?" + +"We shall hope to make friends with people--and to meet old friends. It +is such a pleasant surprise to find you here. I heard you were settled +in Paris." + +"So I was, for several years; the Parisians said nice things about my +pictures. But one may weary even of Paris. I returned here two years +ago, and am now as much of a fixture in New York as if I'd never left +it." + +"But not a permanent fixture. Shall we never see you in London?" + +"My present probabilities lie rather in the direction of California. I +want to make some studies of the scenery and the atmosphere. Besides, I +am getting too old to think of another European residence." + +"No one gets old after thirty--especially no bachelor!" she answered, +with a smile. "But if you were ever to feel old, the society of London +would rejuvenate you." + +"It has certainly done you no harm. But you have the happiness to be +married." + +She looked at me pleasantly and said, "Yes, I make a good +Englishwoman." That sounded like an evasion, but the expression of her +face was not evasive. In the old days she would probably have flushed +up and said something cutting. + +"You must see my little girl," she said, after a while. + +The child was called, and presently came in. She resembles her mother, +and has a vivacity scarcely characteristic of English children. I am +not constitutionally a worshiper of children, but I liked Susie. She +put her arms round her mother's arm, and gazed at me with wide-eyed +scrutiny. + +"This is Mr. Campbell," said mamma. + +"My name is Susan Courtney," said the little thing. "We are going to +stay in New York three years. Hot here--this is only an hotel--we are +going to have a house. How do you do? This is my dolly." + +I saluted dolly, and thereby inspired its parent with confidence: she +put her hand in mine, and gave me her smooth little cheek to kiss. "You +are not like papa," she then observed. + +I smiled conciliatingly, being uncertain whether it were prudent to +follow this lead; but Mrs. Courtney asked, "In what way different, +dear?" + +"Papa has a beard," replied Susie. + +The incident rather struck me; it seemed to indicate that Mrs. Courtney +was under no apprehension that the child would say anything +embarrassing about the father. Having learned so much, I ventured +farther. + +"Do you love papa or mamma best?" I inquired. + +"I am with mamma most," she answered, after meditation, "but when papa +comes, I like him." + +This was non-committal. She continued, "Papa is coming here day after +to-morrow. To-morrow, mamma and I are going to find a house." + +"Your husband leaves all that to you?" I said, turning to Mrs. Courtney. + +"Mr. Courtney never knows or cares what sort of a place he lives in. It +took me some little time to get used to that. I wanted everything to be +just in a certain way. They used to laugh at me, and say I was more +English than he." + +"Now that you are both here, you must both be American." + +"He doesn't enjoy America much. Of course, it is very different from +London. An Englishman can not be expected to care for American ways and +American quickness, and--" + +"American people?" I put in, laughingly. + +"Don't undress dolly here," she said to Susie. "It isn't time yet to +put her to bed, and she might catch cold." + +Was this another evasion? The serene face betrayed nothing, but she had +left unanswered the question that aimed at discovering how she and her +husband stood toward each other. After all, however, no answer could +have told me more than her no answer did--supposing it to have been +intentional. I soon afterward took my leave, after having arranged to +call to-morrow and accompany her and Susie on their house-hunting +expedition. Upon the whole, I don't think I am sorry to have renewed my +acquaintance with her. She is more delightful--as an acquaintance--than +when I knew her formerly. Should I have fallen in love with her had I +met her for the first time as she is now? Yes, and no! In the old days +there was something about her that commanded me--that fascinated my +youthful imagination. Perhaps it was only the freshness, the ignorance, +the timidity of young maidenhood--that mystery of possibilities of a +nature that has not yet met the world and received its impress for good +or evil. It is this which captivates in youth; and this, of course, +Mrs. Courtney has lost. But every quality that might captivate mature +manhood is hers, and, were I likely to think of marriage now, and were +she marriageable, she is the type of woman I would choose. Yet I do not +quite relish the perception that my present feminine ideal (whether it +be lower or higher) is not the former one. But,--frankly, would I marry +her if I could? I hardly know: I have got out of the habit of regarding +marriage as among my possibilities; many avenues of happiness that once +were open to me are now closed against me. Put it, that I have lost a +faculty--that I am now able to enjoy only in imagination a phase of +existence that, formerly, I could have enjoyed in fact. This bit of +self-analysis may be erroneous; but I would not like to run the risk of +proving it so! Am I not well enough off as I am? My health is fair, my +mind active, my reputation secure, my finances prosperous. The things +that I can dream must surely be better than anything that could happen. +I can picture, for example, a state of matrimonial felicity which no +marriage of mine could realize. Besides, I can, whenever I choose, see +Mrs. Courtney herself, talk with her, and enjoy her as a reasonable and +congenial friend, apart from the danger and disappointment that might +result from a closer connection. I think I have chosen the wiser part, +or, rather, the wiser part has been thrust upon me. That I shall never +be wildly happy is, at least, security that I shall never be profoundly +miserable. I shall simply be comfortable. Is this sour grapes? Am I, if +not counting, then discounting my eggs before they are hatched? To such +questions a practical--a materialized--answer would be the only +conclusive one. Were Mrs. Courtney ready to drop into my mouth, I +should either open my mouth, or else I should shut it, and either act +would be conclusive. But, so far from being ready to drop into my +mouth, she is immovably and (to all appearances) contentedly fixed +where she is. I suppose I am insinuating that appearances are +deceptive; that she may be unhappy with her husband, and desire to +leave him. Well, there is no technical evidence in support of such an +hypothesis; but, again, in a matter of this kind, it is not so much the +technical as the indirect evidence that tells--the cadences of the +voice, the breathing, the silences, the atmosphere. There is no denying +that I did somehow acquire a vague impression that Courtney is not so +large a figure in his wife's eyes as he might be. I may have been +biased by my previous conception of his character, or I may have +misinterpreted the impalpable, indescribable signs that I remarked in +her. But, once more, how do I know that her not caring for him would +postulate her caring for me? Why should she care for either of us? Our +old romance is to her as the memory of something read in a book, and it +is powerless to make her heart beat one throb the faster. Were Courtney +to die to-morrow, would his widow expect me to marry her? Not she! She +would settle down here quietly, educate her daughter, and think better +of her departed husband with every year that passed, and less of +repeating the experiment that made her his! I may be prone to romantic +and elaborate speculations, but I am not exactly a fool. I do not +delude myself with the idea that Mrs. Courtney is, at this moment, +following my example by recording her impressions of me at her own +writing-desk, and asking herself whether--if such and such a thing were +to happen--such another would be apt to follow. No; she has put Susie +to bed, and is by this time asleep herself, after having read through +the "Post," or "Bazar," or the last new novel, as her predilection may +be. It is after midnight; since she has not followed my example, I will +follow hers; it is much the more sensible of the two. + +_May 2d_.--What a woman she is! and, in a different sense, what a man I +am! How little does a man know or suspect himself until he is brought +to the proof! How serenely and securely I philosophized and laid down +the law yesterday! and to-day, how strange to contrast the event with +my prognostication of it! And yet, again, how little has happened that +might not be told in such a way as to appear nothing! It was the latent +meaning, the spirit, the touch of look and tone. Her husband may have +reached New York by this time; they may be together at this moment; he +will find no perceptible change in her--perceptible to him! He will be +told that I have been her escort during the day, and that I was polite +and serviceable, and that a house has been selected. What more is there +to tell? Nothing--that he could hear or understand! and +yet--everything! He will say, "Yes, I recollect Campbell; nice fellow; +have him to dine with us one of these days." But I shall never sit at +their table; I shall never see her again; I can not! I shall start for +California next week. Meanwhile I will write down the history of one +day, for it is well to have these things set visibly before one--to +grasp the nettle, as it were. Nothing is so formidable as it appears +when we shrink from defining it to ourselves. + +I drove to the hotel in my brougham at eleven o'clock, as we had +previously arranged. She was ready and waiting for me, and little Susie +was with her. Ethel was charmingly dressed, and there was a soft look +in her eyes as she turned them on me--a look that seemed to say, "I +remember the past; it is pleasant to see you, so pleasant as to be +sad!" Susie came to me as if I were an old friend, and I lifted the +child from the floor and kissed her twice. + +"Why did you give me two kisses?" she demanded, as I put her down. +"Papa always gives me only one kiss." + +"Papa has mamma as well as you to kiss; but I have no one; I am an old +bachelor." + +"When you have known mamma longer, will you kiss her too?" + +"Old bachelors kiss nobody but little girls," I replied, laughing. + +"We went down to the brougham, and after we were seated and on our +way," Ethel said, "Already I feel so much at home in New York, it +almost startles me. I fancied I should have forgotten old +associations--should have grown out of sympathy with them; but I seem +only to have learned to appreciate them more. Our memory for some +things is better than we would believe." + +"There are two memories in us," I remarked; "the memory of the heart +and the memory of the head. The former never is lost, though the other +may be. But I had not supposed that you cared very deeply for the +American period of your life." + +"England is very agreeable," she said, rather hastily. She turned her +head and looked out of the window; but after a pause she added, as if +to herself, "but I am an American!" + +"There is, no doubt, a deep-rooted and substantial repose in English +life such as is scarcely to be found elsewhere," I said; "but, for all +that, I have often thought that the best part of domestic happiness +could exist nowhere but here. Here a man may marry the woman he loves, +and their affection for each other will be made stronger by the +hardships they may have to pass through. After all, when we come to the +end of our lives, it is not the business we have done, nor the social +distinction we have enjoyed--it is the love we have given and received +that we are glad of." + +"Mamma," inquired Susie, "does Mr. Campbell love you?" + +We both of us looked at the child and laughed a little. "Mr. Campbell +is an old friend," said Ethel. After a few moments she blushed. She +held in her hand some house-agents' orders to view houses, and these +she now began to examine. "Is this Madison Avenue place likely to be a +good one?" she asked me. + +"It is conveniently situated and comfortable; but I should think it +might be too large for a family of three. Perhaps, though, you don't +like a close fit?" + +"I don't like empty rooms, though I prefer such rooms as there are to +be large. But it doesn't make much difference. Mr. Courtney moves about +a good deal, and he is as happy in a hotel as anywhere. These American +hotels are luxurious and splendid, but they are not home-like to me." + +"I remember you used to dislike being among a crowd of people you +didn't know." + +"Yes, and I haven't yet learned to be sociable in that way. A friend is +more company for me than a score of acquaintances. Dear me! I'm afraid +New York will spoil me--for England!" + +"Perhaps Mr. Courtney may be cured of England by New York." + +She smiled and said, "Perhaps! He accommodates himself to things more +easily than I do, but I think one needs to be born in America to know +how to love it." + +Under the veil of discussing America and things in general, we were +talking of ourselves, awakening reminiscences of the past, and +discovering, with a pleasure we did not venture to acknowledge, +that--allowing for the events and the years that had come between--we +were as much in accord as when we were young lovers. Yes, as much, and +perhaps even more. For surely, if one grows in the right way, the +sphere of knowledge and sympathy must enlarge, and thereby the various +points of contact between two minds and hearts must be multiplied. +Ethel and I, during these seven years, had traveled our round of daily +life on different sides of the earth; but the miles of sea and land +which had physically separated us had been powerless to estrange our +spirits. Nothing is more strange, in this mysterious complexity of +impressions and events that we call human existence, than the fact that +two beings, entirely cut off from all natural means of association and +communion, may yet, unknown to each other, be breathing the same +spiritual air and learning the same moral and intellectual lessons. +Like two seeds of the same species, planted, the one in American soil, +the other in English, Ethel and I had selected, by some instinct of the +soul, the same elements from our different surroundings; so that now, +when we met once more, we found a close and harmonious resemblance +between the leaves and blossoms of our experience. What can be more +touching and delightful than such a discovery? Or what more sad than to +know that it came too late for us to profit by it? + +Oh, Ethel, how easy it is to take the little step that separates light +from darkness, happiness from misery! Remembering that we live but +once, and that the worthy enjoyments of life are so limited in number +and so hard to get, it seems unjust and monstrous that one little hour +of jealousy or misunderstanding should wreck the fair prospects of +months and years. Why is mischief so much readier to our hand than good? + +We got out at a house near the Park. I assisted Ethel to alight, and, +as her hand rested on mine, the thought crossed my mind--How sweet if +this were our own home that we are about to enter!--and I glanced at +her face to see whether a like thought had visited her. She maintained +a subdued demeanor, with an expression about the mouth and eyes of a +peculiar timid gentleness, and, as it were, a sort of mental leaning +upon me for support and protection. She felt, it may be, a little fear +of herself, at finding herself--in more senses than one--so near to me; +and, woman-like, she depended upon me to protect her against the very +peril of which I was the occasion. No higher or more delicate +compliment can be paid by a woman to a man; and I resolved that I would +do what in me lay to deserve it. But such resolutions are the hardest +in the world to keep, because the circumstance or the impulse of the +moment is continually in wait to betray you. Ethel was more fascinating +and lovely in this mood than in any other I had hitherto seen her in; +and the misgiving, from which I could not free myself, that the man +whom Fate had made her husband did not appreciate or properly cherish +the gift bestowed upon him, made me warm toward her more than ever. I +could scarcely have believed that such blood could flow in the sober +veins of my middle age; but love knows nothing of time or age! + +"I do not like this house," Susie declared, when we had been admitted +by the care-taker. "It has no carpets, nor chairs, nor pictures; and +the floor is dirty; and the walls are not pretty!" + +"I suppose one can have these houses decorated and furnished at short +notice?" Ethel asked me. + +"It would not take long. There are several firms that make it their +specialty." + +"I have always wanted to live in a house where the colors and forms +were to my taste. I don't know whether you remember that you used to +think I had some taste in such matters. Mr. Courtney, of course, +doesn't care much about art, and he didn't encourage me to carry out my +ideas. A business man can not be an artist, you know." + +"You yourself would have become an artist if--" I began; but I was +approaching dangerous ground, and I stopped. "This dining-room might be +done in Indian red," I remarked--"the woodwork, that is to say. The +walls would be a warm salmon color, which contrasts well with the cold +blue of the china, which it is the fashion to have about nowadays. As +for the furniture, antique dark oak is as safe as anything, don't you +think so?" + +"I should like all that," said she, moving a little nearer me, and +letting her eyes wander about the room with a pleased expression, until +at length they met my own. "If you could only design our decoration for +us, I'm sure it would be perfect; at least, I should be satisfied. +Well, and how should we... how ought the drawing-room to be done?" + +"There is a shade of yellow that is very agreeable for drawing-rooms, +and it goes very well with the dull peacock-blue which is in vogue now. +Then you could get one of those bloomy Morris friezes. There is some +very graceful Chippendale to be picked up in various places. And no +such good furniture is made nowadays. But I am advising you too much +from the artist's point of view." + +"Oh, I can get other sort of advice when I want it." She looked at me +with a smile; our glances met more often now than at first. "But it +seems to me," she went on, "that the way the house is built docs not +suit the way we want to decorate it. Let us look at a smaller one. I +should think ten rooms would be quite enough. And it would be nice to +have a corner house, would it not?" + +"If the question were only of our agreement, there would probably not +be much difficulty," I said, in a tone which I tried to make merely +courteous, but which may have revealed something more than courtesy +beneath it. + +In coming down-stairs she gathered her dress in her right hand and put +her left in my arm; and then, in a flash, the picture came before me of +the last time we had gone arm-in-arm together down-stairs. It was at +her father's house, and she was speaking to me of that unlucky Mrs. +Murray; we had our quarrel that evening in the drawing-room, and it was +never made up. From then till now, what a gulf! and yet those years +would have been but a bridge to pass over, save for the one barrier +that was insurmountable between us. + +"What has become of that Mrs. Murray whom you used to know?" she asked, +as we reached the foot of the stairs. She relinquished my arm as she +spoke, and faced me. + +I felt the blood come to my face. "Mrs. Murray was in my thoughts at +the same moment--and perhaps by the same train of associations." I +answered, "I don't know where she is now; I lost sight of her years +ago--soon after you were married, in fact. Why do you ask?" + +"You had not forgotten her, then?" + +"I had every reason to forget her, except the one reason for which I +have remembered her--and you know what that is! Have you mistrusted me +all this time?" + +"Oh, no--no! I don't think I really mistrusted you at all; and long ago +I admitted to myself that you had acted unselfishly and honorably. But +I was angry at the time; you know, sometimes a girl will be angry, even +when there is no good reason for it. I have long wished for an +opportunity to tell you this, for my own sake, you know, as well as for +yours." + +"I hardly know whether I am most glad or sorry to hear this," I said, +as we moved toward the door. "If you had only been able to say it, or +to think it, before ... there would have been a great difference!" + +"The worst of mistakes is, they are so seldom set right at the time, or +in the way they ought to be. Come, Susie, we are going away now. Susie, +do you most like to be American or English?" + +"English," replied Susie, without hesitation. + +Her mother turned to me and said in a low tone: + +"I love her, whichever she is." + +I understood what she meant. Susie was the symbol of that inevitable +element in our lives which seems to evolve itself without reference to +our desires or efforts; but which, nevertheless, when we have +recognized that it is inevitable, we learn (if we are wise) to accept +and even to love. Save for the estrangement between Ethel and myself, +Susie would never have existed; yet there she was, a beautiful child, +who had as good a right to be as either of us; and her mother loved +her, and, as it were, bade me love her also. I took the little maiden +by the hand and said, "You are right, Susie; the Americans are the +children of the English, and can not expect to be so wise and +comfortable as they. But you must remember that the Americans have a +future before them, and we are not enemies any more. Will you be +friends with me, and let me call you my little girl?" + +"I shouldn't mind being your little girl, if I could still have the +same mamma," was Susie's reply. "Papa is away a great deal, and you +could be papa, you know, until he came back." + +I made some laughing answer; but, in fact, Susie's frank analysis of +the situation poignantly kindled an imagination which stood in no need +of stimulus. Ah, if this were the Golden Age, when love never went +astray, how happy we might be! But it is not the Golden Age--far from +it! Meanwhile, I think I can assert, with a clear conscience, that no +dishonorable purpose possessed me. I loved Ethel too profoundly to wish +to do her wrong. Yet I may have wished--I did wish--that a kindly +Providence might have seen fit to remove the disabilities that +controlled us. If a wish could have removed Courtney painlessly to +another world, I think I should have wished it. There was something +exquisitely touching in Ethel's appearance and manner. She is as pure +as any woman that ever lived; but she is a woman! and I felt that, for +this day, I had a man's power over her. Occasionally I was conscious +that her eyes were resting on my face; when I addressed her, her aspect +softened and brightened; she fell into little moods of preoccupation +from which she would emerge with a sigh; in many ways she betrayed, +without knowing it, the secret that neither of us would mention. I do +not mean to imply that she expected me to mention it. A pure woman does +not realize the dangers of the world; and that very fact is itself her +strongest security against them. But, had I spoken, she would have +responded. It was a temptation which I could hardly have believed I +could have resisted as I did; but such a woman calls out all that is +best and noblest in a man; and, at the time, I was better than I am! + +When we were in the brougham again, I said, "If you will allow me, I +will drive you to a house I have seen, which belongs to a man with whom +I am slightly acquainted. He is on the point of leaving it, but his +furniture is still in it, and, as he is himself an artist and a man of +taste, it will be worth your while to look at it. He is rather deaf, +but that is all the better; we can express our opinions without +disturbing him. Perhaps you might arrange to take house and furniture +as they stand." + +"Whatever you advise, I shall like to do," Ethel answered. + +We presently arrived at the house, which was situated in the upper part +of the town, a little to the west of Fifth Avenue. It was a comely +gabled edifice of red brick, with square bay-windows and a roomy porch. +The occupant, Maler, a German, happened to be at home; and on my +sending in my card, we were admitted at once, and he came to greet us +in the hall in his usual hearty, headlong fashion. + +"My good Campbell," he exclaimed, in his blundering English, "very +delighted to see you. Ah, dis will be madame, and de little maid! So +you are married since some time--I have not know it! Your servant, +Madame Campbell. I know--all de artists know--your husband: we wish we +could paint how he can--but it is impossible! Ha, ha, ha! not so! Now, +I am very pleased you shall see dis house. May I beg de honor of +accompany you? First you shall see de studio; dat I call de stomach of +de house, eh? because it is most important of all de places, and make +de rest of de places live. See, I make dat window be put in--you find +no better light in New York. Den you see, here we have de alcove, where +Madame Campbell shall sit and make her sewing, while de husband do his +work on de easel. How you like dat portiere? I design him myself--oh, +yes, I do all here; you keep them if you like; I go to Germany, perhaps +not come back after some years, so I leave dem, not so? Now I show you +my little chamber of the piano. See, I make an arched ceiling--groined +arch, eh?--and I gild him; so I get pretty light and pretty sound, not? +Ah! madame, I have not de happiness to be married, but I make my house +so, dat if I get me a wife, she find all ready; but no wife come, so I +give him over to Herr Campbell and you. Now we mount up-stairs to de +bed-rooms, eh?" + +In this way he went over the entire house with us. His loud, jolly +voice, his resounding laugh, his bustling manner, his heedless, +boy-like self-confidence, and his deafness, made it impossible to get +in a word of explanation, and, after a few efforts, I gave up the +attempt. + +"Let him suppose what he likes," I said aside to Ethel, "it can make no +difference; he is going away, and you will never see him again. After +all these years, it can do no great harm for us to play at being Mr. +and Mrs. Campbell for an hour!" + +"It is a very beautiful house," she said, tacitly accepting what I had +proposed. "It is such a house as I have always dreamed of living in. I +shall not care to look at any others. Will you tell him that we--that I +will take it just as it stands. You have made this a very pleasant day +for me--a very happy day," she added, in a lower tone. "Every room here +will be associated with you. You will come here often and see me, will +you not? Perhaps, after all, you might use the studio to paint my--or +Susie's portrait in." + +"I shall inflict myself upon you very often, I have no doubt," was all +I ventured to reply. I could not tell her, at that moment, that we must +never see each other again. She--after the manner of women--probably +supposes that a man's strength is limitless; that he may do with +himself and make of himself what he chooses; and she supposes that I +could visit her and converse with her day after day, and yet keep my +thoughts and my acts within such bounds as would enable me to take +Courtney honestly by the hand. But I know too well my own weakness, and +I shall leave her while yet I have power to do so. Tomorrow--or soon--I +will write to her one last letter, telling her why I go. + +Sudden and strange indeed has been this passionate episode in a life +which, methought, had done with passion. It has lasted hardly so many +hours as I have lived years; and yet, were I to live on into the next +century, it would never cease to influence me in all I think and do. I +can not solve to my satisfaction this problem--why two lives should be +wasted as ours have been. Courtney could have been happy with another +wife, or with no wife at all, perhaps; but, for Ethel and me, there +could be no happiness save in each other. But were she free to-day, the +separation that has already existed--long though it has been--would +only serve to render our future union more blissful and complete. We +have learned, by sad experience, the value of a love like ours, and we +should know how to give it its fullest and widest expression. But oh! +what a blank and chilly road lies before us now! + +I drove her back to her hotel; we hardly spoke all the way; my heart +was too full, and hers also, I think; though she did not know, as I +did, that it was our last interview. It must be our last! Heaven help +me to keep that resolution! + +Susie was not at all impressed by the pathos of the situation; she +babbled all the time, and thus, at all events, afforded us an excuse +for our silence. At parting, one incident occurred that may as well be +recorded. I had shaken hands with Ethel, speaking a few words of +farewell, and allowing her to infer that we might meet again on the +morrow; then I turned to Susie, and gave her the kiss which I would +have given the world to have had the right to press on her mother's +lips. Ethel saw, and, I think, understood. She stooped quickly down, +and laid her mouth where mine had been. Through the innocent medium of +the child, our hearts met; and then I saw her no more. + +_May 3d_.--Of course, it may not be true, probably it is not; mistakes +are so easily made in the first moments of such horror and confusion; +the dead come to life, and the living die. Or, at the worst, he may be +only wounded or disabled. At all events, I decline to believe, save +upon certain evidence, that the poor fellow has actually been killed. +Were it to turn out so, I should feel almost like a murderer; for was +not I writing, in this very journal, and perhaps at the very moment the +accident occurred, that if my wish could send him to another world, I +would not spare him? + +_Later_.--I have read all the accounts in the newspapers this morning, +and all agree in putting Courtney's name among the killed. There can be +no doubt about it any longer; he is dead. When the collision occurred, +the car in which he vas riding was thrown across the track, and the +other train crashed through it. Judging by the condition of the body +when discovered, death must have been nearly instantaneous. Poor +Courtney! My conscience is not at ease. Of course, I am not really +responsible; that is only imagination. But I begin to suspect that my +imagination has been playing me more than one trick lately. + +And now, with this new state of affairs so suddenly and terribly +brought about, what is to be done? I am as yet scarcely in a condition +to reflect calmly; but a voice within me seems to say that something +else besides my conscience has been awakened by Courtney's death. Can +it be that imagination, dallying with what it took for impossibilities, +could so far mislead a man? Well, I shall start at once for the scene +of the disaster, and relieve the poor fellow's widow of whatever pain I +can. Ethel Courtney a widow! Ah, Ethel! Death sheds a ghastly light +upon the idle vagaries of the human heart. + +_May 15th_.--_Denver_, _Colorado_.--Magnificent weather and scenery; +very different from my own mental scenery and mood at this moment. I am +sorely out of spirits; and no wonder, after the reckless and insane +emotion of the first days of this month. One pays for such indulgences +at my age. + +I have been re-reading the foregoing pages of this journal. Was I a +fool or a coward, or was I merely intoxicated for eight-and-forty +hours? At all events, Courtney's tragic end sobered me, and put what I +had been doing in a true light. I am glad my insanity was not permitted +to proceed farther than it did; but I have quite enough to reproach +myself with as it is. So far as I hare been able to explain the matter +to myself, my prime error lay in attributing, in a world subject to +constant change, too much permanence to a given state of affairs. The +fact that Ethel was the wife of another man seemed to me so fixed and +unalterable that I allowed my imagination to play with the picture of +what might happen if that unalterable fact were altered. Secure in this +fallacy, I worked myself up to the pitch of believing that I was +actually and passionately in love with a woman whose inaccessibility +was, after all, her most winning attraction. Moreover, by writing down, +in this journal, the events and words of the hours we spent together, I +confirmed myself in my false persuasion, and probably imported into the +record of what we said and did an amount of color and hidden +significance that never, as I am now convinced, belonged to it in +reality. Deluded by the notion that I was playing with a fancy, I was +suddenly aroused to find myself imbrued in facts. The whole episode has +profoundly humiliated me, and degraded me in my own esteem. + +But I am not at the bottom of the mystery yet. Was I not in love with +Ethel? Surely I was, if love be anything. Then why did I not ask her to +marry me? Would she have refused me? No. That last look she gave me +from under her black veil, when I told her I was going away.... Ah, no, +she would not have refused me. Then why did I hesitate? Was not such a +marriage precisely what I have always longed for? During all these +seven years have I not been bewailing my bachelorhood, and wishing for +an Ethel to cheer my solitary fireside with her gracious presence, to +be interested in my work and hopes, to interest me in her wifely and +maternal ways and aspirations? And when at last all these things were +offered me, why did I shrink back and reject them? + +Honestly, I can not explain it. Perhaps, if I had never loved her +before, I might have loved her this time enough to unite my fate with +hers. Or, perhaps--for I may as well speak plainly, since I am speaking +to myself--perhaps, by force of habit, I had grown to love, better than +love itself, those self-same forlorn conditions and dreary solitudes +which I was continually lamenting and praying to be delivered from. +What a dismal solution of the problem this would be were it the true +one! It amounts to saying that I prefer an empty room, a silent hearth, +an old pair of slippers, and a dressing-gown to the love and +companionship of a refined and beautiful woman!--that I love even my +own discomforts more than the comfort she would give me! It sounds +absurd, scandalous, impossible; and yet, if it be not the literal +truth, I know not what the truth is. It is amazing that an educated and +intelligent man can live to be forty years old and still have come to +no better an understanding of himself than I had. Verily, as my old +author said, thought is free, but nature is captive, and loveth her +chain. Yes, my old author was right. + + + + +MY FRIEND PATON. + + +Mathew Morriss, my father, was a cotton merchant in Liverpool +twenty-five years ago--a steady, laborious, clear-headed man, very +affectionate and genial in his private intercourse. He was wealthy, and +we lived in a sumptuous house in the upper part of the city. This was +when I was about ten years old. My father was twice married; I was the +child of the first wife, who died when I was very young; my stepmother +came five years later. She was the elder of two sisters, both beautiful +women. The sister often came to visit us. I remember I liked her better +than I liked my stepmother; in fact, I regarded her with that sort of +romantic attachment that often is developed in lads of my age. She had +golden brown hair and a remarkably sweet voice, and she sang and played +in a manner that transported me with delight; for I was already devoted +to music. She was of a gentle yet impulsive temperament, easily moved +to smiles and tears; she seemed to me the perfection of womankind, and +I made no secret of my determination to marry her when I grew up. She +used to caress me, and look at me in a dreamy way, and tell me I was +the nicest and handsomest boy in the world. "And as soon as you are a +year older than I am, John," she would say, "you shall marry me, if you +like." + +Another frequent visitor at our house at this time was not nearly so +much a favorite of mine. This was a German, Adolf Koerner by name, who +had been a clerk in my father's concern for a number of years, and had +just been admitted junior partner. My father placed every confidence in +him, and often declared that he had the best idea of business he had +ever met with. This may very likely have been the fact; but to me he +appeared simply a tall, grave, taciturn man, of cold manners, speaking +with a slight German accent, which I disliked. I suppose he was about +thirty-seven years of age, but I always thought of him as older than my +father, who was fifty. Another and more valid reason for my disliking +Koerner was that he was in the habit of paying a great deal of attention +to my ladylove, Miss Juliet Tretherne. I used to upbraid Juliet about +encouraging his advances, and I expressed my opinion of him in the +plainest language, at which she would smile in a preoccupied wav, and +would sometimes draw me to her and kiss me on the forehead. Once she +said, "Mr. Koerner is a very noble gentleman; you must not dislike him." +This had the effect of making me hate him all the more. + +One day I noticed an unusual commotion in the house, and Juliet came +down-stairs attired in a lovely white dress, with a long veil, and +fragrant flowers in her hair. She got into a carriage with my father +and stepmother, and drove away. I did not understand what it meant, and +no one told me. After they were gone I went into the drawing-room, and, +greatly to my surprise, saw there a long table covered with a white +cloth and laid out with a profusion of good things to eat and drink in +sparkling dishes and decanters. In the middle of the table was a great +cake covered with white frosting; the butler was arranging some flowers +round it. + +"What is that cake for, Curtis?" I asked. + +"For the bride, to be sure," said Curtis, without looking up. + +"The bride! who is she?" I demanded in astonishment. + +"Your aunt Juliet, to be sure!" said Curtis, composedly, stepping back +and contemplating his floral arrangement with his head on one side. + +I asked no more, but betook myself with all speed to my room, locked +the door, flung myself on the bed, and cried to heartbreaking with +grief, indignation, and mortification. After a very long time some one +tried the door, and a voice--the voice of Juliet--called to me. I made +no answer. She began to plead with me; I resisted as long as I could, +but finally my affection got the better of my resentment, and I arose +and opened the door, hiding my tear-stained face behind my arm. Juliet +caught me in her arms and kissed me; tears were running down her own +cheeks. How lovely she looked! My heart melted, and I was just on the +point of forgiving her when the voice of Koerner became audible from +below, calling out "Mrs. Koerner!" I tore myself away from her, and +cried passionately, "You don't love me! you love him! go to him!" She +looked at me for a moment with a pained expression; then she put her +hand in the pocket of her dress and drew out something done up in white +paper. "See what I have brought you, you unkind boy," said she. "What +is it?" I demanded. "A piece of my wedding-cake," she replied. "Give it +me!" said I. She put it in my hand; I ran forward to the head of the +stairs, which Koerner was just ascending, dashed the cake in his face, +and then rushed back to my own room, whence neither threats nor coaxing +availed to draw me forth for the rest of the day. + +I never saw Juliet again. She and her husband departed on their +wedding-trip that afternoon; it was to take them as far as Germany, for +Koerner said that he wished to visit his father and mother, who were +still alive, before settling down permanently in Liverpool. Whether +they really did so was never discovered. But, about a fortnight later, +a dreadful fact came to light. Koerner--the grave and reticent Koerner, +whom everybody trusted and thought so highly of--was a thief, and he +had gone off with more than half my father's property in his pocket. +The blow almost destroyed my father, and my stepmother, too, for that +matter, for at first it seemed as though Juliet must have been privy to +the crime. This, however, turned out not to have been the case. Her +fate must have been all the more terrible on that account; but no news +of either of them ever came back to us, and my father would never take +any measures to bring Koerner to justice. It was several months before +he recovered from the shock sufficiently to take up business again; and +then the American Civil War came and completed his ruin. He died, a +poor and broken-down man, a year later. My stepmother, who was really +an admirable woman, realized whatever property remained to us, took a +small house, and sent me to an excellent school, where I was educated +for Cambridge. Meanwhile I had been devoting all possible time to +music; for I had determined to become a composer, and I was looking +forward, after taking my degree, to completing my musical education +abroad; but my mother's health was precarious, and, when the time came, +she found herself unequal to making the journey, and the change of +habits and surroundings that it implied. We lived very quietly in +Liverpool for three or four years; then she died, and, after I had +settled our affairs, I found myself in possession of a small income and +alone in the world. Without loss of time I set out for the Continent. + +I went to a German city, where the best musical training was to be had, +and made my arrangements to pass several years there. At the banker's, +when I went to provide for the regular receipt of my remittances, I met +a young American, by name Paton Jeffries. He was from New England, and, +I think, a native of the State of Connecticut; his father, he told me, +was a distinguished inventor, who had made and lost a considerable +fortune in devising a means of promoting sleep by electricity. Paton +was studying to be an architect, which, he said, was the coming +profession in his country; and it was evident, on a short acquaintance, +that he was a fellow of unusual talents--one of those men of whom you +say that, come what may, they are always sure to fall on their feet. +For my part, I have certainly never met with so active and versatile a +spirit. He was a year or so older than I, rather tall than short, +lightly but strongly built, with a keen, smiling, subtle face, a +finely-developed forehead, light wavy hair, and gray eyes, very +penetrating and bright. There was a pleasing kind of eagerness and +volubility in his manner of talking, and a slight imperfection, not +amounting to a lisp, in his utterance, which imparted a naive charm to +his speech. He used expressive and rapid gestures with his hands and +arms, and there was a magnetism, a fascination, about the whole man +that strongly impressed me. I was at that period much more susceptible +of impressions, and prone to yield to them, than I am now. Paton's +rattling vivacity, his knowledge of the world, his entertaining talk +and stories, his curiosity, enterprise, and audacity, took me by storm; +he was my opposite in temperament and character, and it seemed to me +that he had most of the advantages on his side. Nevertheless, he +professed, and I still believe he felt, a great liking for me, and we +speedily came to an agreement to seek a lodging together. On the second +day of our search, we found just what we wanted. + +It was an old house, on the outskirts of the town, standing by itself, +with a small garden behind it. It had formerly been occupied by an +Austrian baron, and it was probably not less than two hundred years +old. The baron's family had died out, or been dispersed, and now the +venerable edifice was let, in the German fashion, in separate floors or +_etages_, communicating with a central staircase. Some alterations +rendered necessary by this modification had been made, but +substantially the house was unchanged. Our apartment comprised four or +five rooms on the left of the landing and at the top of the house, +which consisted of three stories. The chief room was the parlor, which +looked down through a square bow-window on the street. This room was of +irregular shape, one end being narrower than the other, and nearly +fitting the space at this end was a kind of projecting shelf or +mantelpiece (only, of course, there was no fireplace under it, open +fireplaces being unknown in Germany), upon which rested an old cracked +looking-glass, made in two compartments, the frame of which, black with +age and fly-spots, was fastened against the wall. The shelf was +supported by two pilasters; but the object of the whole structure was a +mystery; so far as appeared, it served no purpose but to support the +looking-glass, which might just as well have been suspended from a nail +in the wall. Paton, I remember, betrayed a great deal of curiosity +about it; and since the consideration of the problem was more in his +line of business than in mine, I left it to him. At the opposite end of +the room stood a tall earthenware stove. The walls were wainscoted five +feet up from the dark polished floor, and were hung with several smoky +old paintings, of no great artistic value. The chairs and tables were +plain, but very heavy and solid, and of a dark hue like the room. The +window was nearly as wide as it was high, and opened laterally from the +center on hinges. The other rooms were of the same general appearance, +but smaller. We both liked the place, and soon made ourselves very +comfortable in it. I hired a piano, and had it conveyed upstairs to the +parlor; while Paton disposed his architectural paraphernalia on and in +the massive writing-table near the window. Our cooking and other +household duties were done for us by the wife of the _portier_, the +official corresponding to the French _concierge_, who, in all German +houses, attends at the common door, and who, in this case, lived in a +couple of musty little closets opening into the lower hall, and eked +out his official salary by cobbling shoes. He was an odd, grotesque +humorist, of most ungainly exterior, black haired and bearded, with a +squint, a squab nose, and a short but very powerful figure. Dirty he +was beyond belief, and he was abominably fragrant of vile tobacco. For +my part, I could not endure this fellow; but Paton, who had much more +of what he called human nature in him than I had, established friendly +relations with him at once, and reported that he found him very +amusing. It was characteristic of Paton that, though he knew much less +about the German language than I did, he could understand and make +himself understood in it much better; and, when we were in company, it +was always he who did the talking. + +It would never have occurred to me to wonder, much less to inquire, who +might be the occupants of the other _etages_; but Paton was more +enterprising, and before we had been settled three days in our new +quarters, he had gathered from his friend the portier, and from other +sources, all the obtainable information on the subject. The information +was of no particular interest, however, except as regarded the persons +who dwelt on the floor immediately below us. They were two--an old man +and a young woman, supposed to be his daughter. They had been living +here several years--from before the time, indeed, that the portier had +occupied his present position. In all these years the old man was known +to have been out of his room only twice. He was certainly an eccentric +person, and was said to be a miser and extremely wealthy. The portier +further averred that his property--except such small portion of it as +was invested and on the income of which he lived--was realized in the +form of diamonds and other precious stones, which, for greater +security, he always carried, waking or sleeping, in a small leathern +bag, fastened round his neck by a fine steel chain. His daughter was +scarcely less a mystery than he, for, though she went out as often as +twice or thrice a week, she was always closely veiled, and her figure +was so disguised by the long cloak she wore that it was impossible to +say whether she were graceful or deformed, beautiful or ugly. The +balance of belief, however, was against her being attractive in any +respect. The name by which the old miser was known was Kragendorf; but, +as the portier sagaciously remarked, there was no knowing, in such +cases, whether the name a man bore was his own or somebody's else. + +This Kragendorf mystery was another source of apparently inexhaustible +interest to Paton, who was fertile in suggestions as to how it might be +explained or penetrated. I believe he and the portier talked it over at +great length, but, so far as I am aware, without arriving at any +solution. I took little heed of the matter, being now fully absorbed in +my studies; and it is to be hoped that Herr Kragendorf was not of a +nervous temperament, otherwise he must have inveighed profanely against +the constant piano-practice that went on over his head. I also had a +violin, on which I flattered myself I could perform with a good deal of +expression, and by and by, in the long, still evenings--it was +November, but the temperature was still mild--I got into the habit of +strolling along the less frequented streets, with my violin under my +shoulder, drawing from it whatever music my heart desired. Occasionally +I would pause at some convenient spot, lean against a wall, and give +myself up to improvisation. At such times a little cluster of auditors +would gradually collect in front of me, listening for the most part +silently, or occasionally giving vent to low grunts and interjections +of approval. One evening, I remember, a young woman joined the group, +though keeping somewhat in the background; she listened intently, and +after a time gradually turned her face toward me, unconsciously as it +were; and the light of a street-lamp at a little distance revealed a +countenance youthful, pale, sad, and exquisitely beautiful. It +impressed me as with a vague reminiscence of something I had seen or +imagined--some pictured face, perhaps, caught in a glance and never to +be identified. Her eyes finally met mine; I stopped playing. She +started, gave me an alarmed look, and, gliding swiftly away, +disappeared. I could not forget this incident; it haunted me strangely +and persistently. Many a time thereafter I revisited the same spot, and +drew together other audiences, but the delicate girl with the dark-blue +eyes and the tender, sensitive mouth, was never again among them. + +It was at this epoch, I think, that the inexhaustible Paton made a +discovery. From my point of view it was not a discovery of any moment; +but, as usual, he took interest in it enough for both of us. It +appeared that, in attempting to doctor the crack in the old +looking-glass, a large piece of the plate had got loose, and come away +in his hands; and in the space behind he had detected a paper, +carefully folded and tied up with a piece of faded ribbon. Paton was +never in the habit of hampering himself with fine-drawn scruples, and +he had no hesitation in opening the folded paper and spreading it out +on the table. Judging from the glance I gave it, it seemed to be a +confused and abstruse mixture of irregular geometrical figures and +cramped German chirography. But Paton set to work upon it with as much +concentration as if it had been a recipe for the Philosopher's Stone; +he reproduced the lines and angles on fresh paper, and labored over the +writing with a magnifying-glass and a dictionary. At times he would +mutter indistinctly to himself, lift his eyebrows, nod or shake his +head, bite his lips, and rub his forehead, and anon fall to work again +with fresh vigor. At last he leaned back in his chair, thumped his hand +on the table, and laughed. + +"Got it!" he exclaimed. "Say, John, old boy, I've got it! and it's the +most curious old thing ever you saw in your life!" + +"Something in analytical geometry, isn't it?" said I, turning round on +my piano-stool. + +"Analytical pudding's end! It's a plan of a house, my boy, and, what's +more, of this very house we're in! That's a find, and no mistake! These +are the descriptions and explanations--these bits of writing. It's a +perfect labyrinth of Crete! Udolpho was nothing to it!" + +"Well, I suppose it isn't of much value except as a curiosity?" + +"Don't be too sure of that, John, my boy! Who knows but there's a +treasure concealed somewhere in this house? or a skeleton in a secret +chamber! This old paper may make our fortune yet!" + +"The treasure wouldn't belong to us if we found it; and, besides, we +can't make explorations beyond our own premises, and we know what's in +them already." + +"Do we? Did we know what was behind the looking-glass? Did you never +hear of sliding panels, and private passages, and concealed staircases? +Where's your imagination, man? But you don't need imagination--here it +is in black and white!" + +As he spoke, he pointed to a part of the plan; but, as I was stooping +to examine it, he seemed to change his mind. + +"No matter," he exclaimed, suddenly folding up the paper and rising +from his chair. "You're not an architect, and you can't be expected to +go in for these things. No; there's no practical use in it, of course. +But secret passages were always a hobby of mine. Well, what are you +going to do this evening? Come over to the cafe and have a game of +billiards!" + +"No; I shall go to bed early to-night." + +"You sleep too much," said Paton. "Everybody does, if my father, +instead of inventing a way of promoting sleep, had invented a way of +doing without it, he'd have been the richest man in America to-day. +However, do as you like. I sha'n't be back till late." + +He put on his hat and sallied forth with a cigar in his mouth. Paton +was of rather a convivial turn; he liked to have a good time, as he +called it; and, indeed, he seemed to think that the chief end of man +was to get money enough to have a good time continually, a sort of good +eternity. His head was strong, and he could stand a great deal of +liquor; and I have seen him sip and savor a glass of raw brandy or +whisky as another man would a glass of Madeira. In this, and the other +phases of his life about town, I had no participation, being +constitutionally as well as by training averse therefrom; and he, on +the other hand, would never have listened to my sage advice to modify +his loose habits. Our companionship was apart from these things; and, +as I have said, I found in him a good deal that I could sympathize +with, without approaching the moralities. + +That night, after I had been for some time asleep, I awoke and found +myself listening to a scratching and shoving noise that seemed quite +unaccountable. By-and-by it made me uneasy. I got up and went toward +the parlor, from which the noise proceeded. On reaching the doorway, I +saw Paton on his knees before one of the pilasters in the narrow end of +the room; a candle was on the floor beside him, and he was busily at +work at something, though what it was I could not make out. The creak +of the threshold under my foot caused him to look round. He started +violently, and sprang to his feet. + +"Oh! it's you, is it?" he said, after a moment. "Great Scott! how you +scared me! I was--I dropped a bit of money hereabouts, and I was +scraping about to find it. No matter--it wasn't much! Sorry I disturbed +you, old boy." And, laughing, he picked up his candle and went into his +own room. + +From this time there was a change vaguely perceptible in our mutual +relations; we chatted together less than before, and did not see so +much of each other. Paton was apt to be out when I was at home, and +generally sat up after I was abed. He seemed to be busy about +something--something connected with his profession, I judged; but, +contrary to his former custom, he made no attempt to interest me in it. +To tell the truth, I had begun to realize that our different tastes and +pursuits must lead us further and further apart, and that our +separation could be only a question of time. Paton was a materialist, +and inclined to challenge all the laws and convictions that mankind has +instituted and adopted; there was no limit to his radicalism. For +example, on coming in one day, I found him with a curious antique +poniard in his hands, which he had probably bought in some old +curiosity shop. At first I fancied he meant to conceal it; but, if so, +he changed his mind. + +"What do you think of that?" he said, holding it out to me. "There's a +solution of continuity for you! Mind you don't prick yourself! It's +poisoned up to the hilt!" + +"What do you want of such a thing?" I asked. + +"Well, killing began with Cain, and isn't likely to go out of fashion +in our day. I might find it convenient to give one of my friends--you, +for instance--a reminder of his mortality some time. You'll say murder +is immoral. Bless you, man, we never could do without it! No man dies +before his time, and some one dies every day that some one else may +live." + +This was said in a jocose way, and, of course, Paton did not mean it. +But it affected me unpleasantly nevertheless. + +As I was washing my hands in my room, I happened to look out of my +window, which commanded a view of the garden at the back of the house. +It was an hour after sunset, and the garden was nearly dark; but I +caught a movement of something below, and, looking more closely, I +recognized the ugly figure of the portier. He seemed to be tying +something to the end of a long slender pole, like a gigantic +fishing-rod; and presently he advanced beneath my window, and raised +the pole as high as it would go against the wall of the house. The +point he touched was the sill of the window below mine--probably that +of the bedroom of Herr Kragendorf. At this juncture the portier seemed +to be startled at something--possibly he saw me at my window; at all +events, he lowered his pole and disappeared in the house. + +The next day Paton made an announcement that took me by surprise. He +said he had made up his mind to quit Germany, and that very shortly. He +mentioned having received letters from home, and declared he had got, +or should soon have got, all he wanted out of this country. "I'm going +to stop paying money for instruction," he said, "and begin to earn it +by work. I shall stay another week, but then I'm off. Too slow here for +me! I want to be in the midst of things, using my time." + +I did not attempt to dissuade him; in fact, my first feeling was rather +one of relief; and this Paton, with his quick preceptions, was probably +aware of. + +"Own up, old boy!" he said, laughing; "you'll be able to endure my +absence. And yet you needn't think of me as worse than anybody else. If +everybody were musicians and moralists, it would be nice, no doubt; but +one might get tired of it in time, and then what would you do? You must +give the scamps and adventurers their innings, after all! They may not +do much good, but they give the other fellows occupation. I was born +without my leave being asked, and I may act as suits me without asking +anybody's leave." + +This was said on a certain bright morning after our first fall of snow; +the tiled roofs of the houses were whitened with it, it cushioned the +window-sills, and spread a sparkling blankness over the garden. In the +streets it was already melting, and people were slipping and splashing +on the wet and glistening pavements. After gazing out at this scene for +a while, in a mood of unwonted thoughtfulness, Paton yawned, stretched +himself, and declared his intention of taking a stroll before dinner. +Accordingly he lit a cigar and went forth. I watched him go down the +street and turn the corner. + +An hour afterward, just when dinner was on the table, I heard an +unusual noise and shuffling on the stairs, and a heavy knock on the +door. I opened it, and saw four men bearing on a pallet the form of my +friend Paton. A police officer accompanied them. They brought Paton in, +and laid him on his bed. The officer told me briefly what had happened, +gave me certain directions, and, saying that a surgeon would arrive +immediately, he departed with the four men tramping behind him. + +Paton had slipped in going across the street, and a tramway car had run +over him. He was not dead, though almost speechless; but his injuries +were such that it was impossible that he should recover. He kept his +eyes upon me; they were as bright as ever, though his face was deadly +pale. He seemed to be trying to read my thoughts--to find out my +feeling about him, and my opinion of his condition. I was terribly +shocked and grieved, and my face no doubt showed it. By-and-by I saw +his lips move, and bent down to listen. + +"Confounded nuisance!" he whispered faintly in my car. "It's all right, +though; I'm not going to die this time. I've got something to do, and +I'm going to do it--devil take me if I don't!" + +He was unable to say more, and soon after the surgeon came in. He made +an examination, and it was evident that he had no hope. His shrug of +the shoulders was not lost upon Paton, who frowned, and made a defiant +movement of the lip. But presently he said to me, still in the same +whisper, "John, if that old fool should be right--he won't be, but in +case of accidents--you must take charge of my things--the papers, and +all. I'll make you heir of my expectations! Write out a declaration to +that effect: I can sign my name; and he'll be witness." + +I did as he directed, and having explained to the surgeon the nature of +the document, I put the pen in Paton's hand; but was obliged to guide +his hand with my own in order to make an intelligible signature. The +surgeon signed below, and Paton seemed satisfied. He closed his eyes; +his sufferings appeared to be very slight. But, even while I was +looking at him, a change came over his face--a deadly change. His eyes +opened; they were no longer bright, but sunken and dull. He gave me a +dusky look--whether of rage, of fear, or of entreaty, I could not tell. +His lips parted, and a voice made itself audible; not like his own +voice, but husky and discordant. "I'm going," it said. "But look out +for me.... Do it yourself!" + +"Der Herr ist todt" (the man is dead), said the surgeon the next minute. + +It was true. Paton had gone out of this life at an hour's warning. What +purpose or desire his last words indicated, there was nothing to show. +He was dead; and yet I could hardly believe that it was so. He had been +so much alive; so full of schemes and enterprises. Nothing now was left +but that crushed and haggard figure, stiffening on the bed; nothing, at +least, that mortal senses could take cognizance of. It was a strange +thought. + +Paton's funeral took place a few days afterward. I returned from the +graveyard weary in body and mind. At the door of the house stood the +portier, who nodded to me, and said, + +"A very sad thing to happen, worthy sir; but so it is in the world. Of +all the occupants of this house, one would have said the one least +likely to be dead to-day was Herr Jeffries. Heh! if I had been the good +Providence, I would have made away with the old gentleman of the +_etage_ below, who is of no use to anybody." + +This, for lack of a better, was Paton's funeral oration. I climbed the +three flights of stairs and let myself into our apartment--mine +exclusively now. The place was terribly lonely; much more so than if +Paton had been alive anywhere in the world. But he was dead; and, if +his own philosophy were true, he was annihilated. But it was not true! +How distinct and minute was my recollection of him--his look, his +gestures, the tones of his voice. I could almost see him before me; my +memory of him dead seemed clearer than when he was alive. In that +invisible world of the mind was he not living still, and perhaps not +far away. + +I sat down at the table where he had been wont to work, and unlocked +the drawers in which he kept his papers. These, or some of them, I took +out and spread before me. But I found it impossible, as yet, to +concentrate my attention upon them; I pushed back my chair, and, +rising, went to the piano. Here I remained for perhaps a couple of +hours, striking the vague chords that echo wandering thoughts. I was +trying to banish this haunting image of Paton from my mind, and at +length I partly succeeded. + +All at once, however, the impression of him (as I may call it) came +back with a force and vividness that startled me. I stopped playing, +and sat for a minute perfectly still. I felt that Paton was in the +room; that if I looked round I should see him. I however restrained +myself from looking round with all the strength of my will--wherefore I +know not. What I felt was not fear, but the conviction that I was on +the brink of a fearful and unprecedented experience--an experience that +would not leave me as it found me. This strange struggle with myself +taxed all my powers; the sweat started out on my forehead. At last the +moment came when I could struggle no longer. I laid my hand on the +keyboard, and pushed myself round on the stool. There was a momentary +dazzle before my eyes, and after that I saw plainly. My hand, striking +the keys, had produced a jarring discord; and while this was yet +tingling in my ears, Paton, who was sitting in his old place at the +table, with his back toward me, faced about in his chair, and his eyes +met mine. I thought he smiled. + +My excitement was past, and was succeeded by a dead calm. I examined +him critically. His appearance was much the same as when in life; nay, +he was even more like himself than before. The subtle or crafty +expression which had always been discernible in his features was now +intensified, and there was something wild and covertly fierce in the +shining of his gray eyes, something that his smile was unable to +disguise. What was human and genial in my former friend had passed +away, and what remained was evil--the kind of evil that I now perceived +to have been at the base of his nature. It was a revelation of +character terrible in its naked completeness. I knew at a glance that +Paton must always have been a far more wicked man that I had ever +imagined; and in his present state all the remains of goodness had been +stripped away, and nothing but wickedness was left. + +I felt impelled, by an impulse for which I could not account, to +approach the table and examine the papers once more; and now it entered +into my mind to perceive a certain method and meaning in them that had +been hidden from me before. It was as though I were looking at them +through Paton's intelligence, and with his memory. He had in some way +ceased to be visible to me; but I became aware that he wished me to sit +down in his chair, and I did so. Under his guidance, and in obedience +to a will that seemed to be my own, and yet was in direct opposition to +my real will, I began a systematic study of the papers. Paton, +meanwhile, remained close to me, though I could no longer see him; but +I felt the gaze of his fierce, shining eyes, and his crafty, evil +smile. I soon obtained a tolerable insight into what the papers meant, +and what was the scheme in which Paton had been so much absorbed at the +time of his death, and which he had been so loath to abandon. + +It was a wicked and cruel scheme, worked out to the smallest +particular. But, though I understood its hideousness intellectually, it +aroused in mo no corresponding emotion; my sensitiveness to right arid +wrong seemed stupefied or inoperative. I could say, "This is wicked," +but I could not awaken in myself a horror of committing the wickedness; +and, moreover, I knew that, if the influence Paton was able to exercise +over me continued, I must in due time commit it. + +Presently I became aware, or, to speak more accurately, I seemed to +remember, that there was something in Paton's room which it was +incumbent on me to procure. I went thither, lifted up a corner of the +rag between the bed and the stove, and beheld, in an aperture in the +floor, of the existence of which I had till now known nothing, the +antique poisoned dagger that Paton had showed me a few weeks before, +and which I had not seen since then. I brought it back to the +sitting-room, put it in a drawer of the table, and locked the drawer, +at the same time making a mental note to the effect that I should +reopen the drawer at a certain hour of the night and take the dagger +out. All this while Paton was close at hand, though not visible to +sight; but I had a sort of inner perception of his presence and +movements. All at once, at about the hour of sunset, I saw him again; +he moved toward the looking-glass at the narrow end of the room, laid +his hand upon one of the pilasters, glanced at me over his shoulder, +and immediately seemed to stoop down. As I sat, the edge of the table +hid him from sight. I stood up and looked across. He was not there; and +a kind of reaction of my nerves informed me that he was gone +absolutely, for the time. + +This reaction produced a lassitude impossible to describe; it was +overpowering, and I had no choice but to yield to it. I dropped back in +my chair, leaned forward on the table, and instantly fell into a heavy +sleep, or stupor. + +I awoke abruptly, with a sensation as if a hand had been laid on my +shoulder. It was night, and I knew that the hour I had noted in my mind +was at hand. I opened the drawer and took out the dagger, which I put +in my pocket. The house was quite silent. A shiver passed through me. I +was aware that Paton was standing at the narrow end of the room, +waiting for me: Yes--there he was, or the impression of him in my +brain--what did it matter? I arose mechanically and walked toward him. +He had no need to direct me: I knew all there was to do, and how to do +it. I knelt on the floor, laid my shoulder against the pilaster, and +pushed it laterally. It moved aside on a pivot, disclosing an iron ring +let into the floor. I laid hold of this ring, and lifted. A section of +the floor came up, and I saw a sort of ladder descending +perpendicularly into darkness. Down the ladder Paton went, and I +followed him. Arrived at the bottom, I turned to the left, led by an +instinct or a fascination; passed along a passage barely wide enough to +admit me, until I came against a smooth, hard surface. I passed my hand +over it until I touched a knob or catch, which I pressed, and the +surface gave way before me like a door. I stumbled forward, and found +myself in a room of what was doubtless Herr Kragendorf's apartment. A +keen, cold air smote against my face; and with it came a sudden influx +of strength and self-possession. I felt that, for a moment at least, +the fatal influence of Paton upon me was broken. But what was that +sound of a struggle--those cries and gasps, that seemed to come from an +adjoining room? + +I sprang forward, opened a door, and beheld a tall old man, with white +hair and beard, in the grasp of a ruffian whom I at once recognized as +the portier. A broken window showed how he had effected his entrance. +One hand held the old man by the throat; in the other was a knife, +which he was prevented from using by a young woman, who had flung +herself upon him in such a way as to trammel his movements. In another +moment, however, he would have shaken her off. + +But that moment was not allowed him. I seized him with a strength that +amazed myself--a strength which never came upon me before or since. The +conflict lasted but a breath or two; I hurled him to the floor, and, as +he fell, his right arm was doubled under him, and the knife which he +held entered his back beneath the left shoulder-blade. When I rose up +from the whirl and fury of the struggle, I saw the old man reclining +exhausted on the bosom of the girl. I knew him, despite his white hair +and beard. And the face that bent so lovingly above him was the face +that had looked into mine that night on the street--the face of the +blue-eyed maiden--of a younger and a lovelier Juliet! As I gazed, there +came a thundering summons at the door, and the police entered. + + * * * * * + +My poor uncle Koerner had not prospered after his great stroke of +roguery. His wife had died of a broken heart, after giving birth to a +daughter, and his stolen riches had vanished almost as rapidly as they +were acquired. He had at last settled down with his daughter in this +old house. The treasure in the leathern bag, though a treasure to him, +was not of a nature to excite general cupidity. It consisted, not of +precious stones, but of relics of his dead wife--her rings, a lock of +her hair, her letters, a miniature of her in a gold case. These poor +keepsakes, and his daughter, had been the only solace of his lonely and +remorseful life. + +It was uncertain whether Paton and the portier had planned the robbery +together, or separately, and in ignorance of each other's purpose. Nor +can I tell whether my disembodied visitor came to me with good or with +evil intent. Wicked spirits, even when they seem to have power to carry +out their purposes, are perhaps only permitted to do so, so far as is +consistent with an overruling good of which they know nothing. +Certainly, if I had not descended the secret passage, Koerner would have +been killed, and perhaps my Juliet likewise--the mother of my children. +But should I have been led on to stab him myself, with the poisoned +dagger, had the portier not been there? Juliet smiles and says No, and +I am glad to agree with her. But I have never since then found that +anniversary upon me, without a shudder of awe, and a dark thought of +Paton Jeffries. + + + + +THE END. + + + + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of David Poindexter's Disappearance and +Other Tales, by Julian Hawthorne + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE *** + +***** This file should be named 7057.txt or 7057.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/7/0/5/7057/ + +Produced by Michelle Shephard, Eric Eldred, Charles Franks +and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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You can also find out about how to make a +donation to Project Gutenberg, and how to get involved. + + +**Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** + +**eBooks Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** + +*****These eBooks Were Prepared By Thousands of Volunteers!***** + + +Title: David Poindexter's Disappearance and Other Tales + +Author: Julian Hawthorne + +Release Date: December, 2004 [EBook #7057] +[Yes, we are more than one year ahead of schedule] +[This file was first posted on March 3, 2003] + +Edition: 10 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE *** + + + + +This eBook was produced by Michelle Shephard, Eric Eldred, +Charles Franks and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team + + + + + +DAVID POINDEXTER'S +DISAPPEARANCE +_AND OTHER TALES_ + +BY +JULIAN HAWTHORNE + + + + +CONTENTS. + + +DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE +KEN'S MYSTERY +"WHEN HALF-GODS GO, THE GODS ARRIVE" +"SET NOT THY FOOT ON GRAVES" +MY FRIEND PATON + + + + +DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE. + + +Among the records of the English state trials are to be found many +strange stories, which would, as the phrase is, make the fortune of a +modern novelist. But there are also numerous cases, not less +stimulating to imagination and curiosity, which never attained more +than local notoriety, of which the law was able to take but +comparatively small cognizance, although they became subjects of much +unofficial discussion and mystification. Among these cases none, +perhaps, is better worth recalling than that of David Poindexter. It +will be my aim here to tell the tale as simply and briefly as possible +--to repeat it, indeed, very much as it came to my ears while living, +several years ago, near the scene in which its events took place. There +is a temptation to amplify it, and to give it a more recent date and a +different setting; but (other considerations aside) the story might +lose in force and weight more than it would thereby gain in artistic +balance and smoothness. + +David Poindexter was a younger son of an old and respected family in +Sussex, England. He was born in London in 1785. He was educated at +Oxford, with a view to his entering the clerical profession, and in the +year 1810 he obtained a living in the little town of Witton, near +Twickenham, known historically as the home of Sir John Suckling. The +Poindexters had been much impoverished by the excesses of David's +father and grandfather, and David seems to have had few or no resources +beyond the very modest stipend appertaining to his position. He was, at +all events, poor, though possessed of capacities which bade fair to +open to him some of the higher prizes of his calling; but, on the other +hand, there is evidence that he chafed at his poverty, and reason to +believe that he had inherited no small share of the ill-regulated +temperament which had proved so detrimental to the elder generations of +his family. + +Personally he was a man of striking aspect, having long, dark hair, +heavily-marked eyebrows, and blue eyes; his mouth and chin were +graceful in contour, but wanting in resolution; his figure was tall, +well knit, and slender. He was an eloquent preacher, and capable, when +warmed by his subject, of powerfully affecting the emotions of his +congregation. He was a great favorite with women--whom, however, he +uniformly treated with coldness--and by no means unpopular with men, +toward some of whom he manifested much less reserve. Nevertheless, +before the close of the second year of his incumbency he was known to +be paying his addresses to a young lady of the neighborhood, Miss Edith +Saltine, the only child of an ex-army officer. The colonel was a +widower, and in poor health, and since he was living mainly on his +half-pay, and had very little to give his daughter, the affair was +looked upon as a love match, the rather since Edith was a handsome +young woman of charming character. The Reverend David Poindexter +certainly had every appearance of being deeply in love; and it is often +seen that the passions of reserved men, when once aroused, are stronger +than those of persons more generally demonstrative. + +Colonel Saltine did not at first receive his proposed son-in-law with +favor. He was a valetudinarian, and accustomed to regard his daughter +as his nurse by right, and he resented the idea of her leaving him +forlorn for the sake of a good-looking parson. It is very likely that +his objections might have had the effect of breaking off the match, for +his daughter was devotedly attached to him, and hardly questioned his +right to dispose of her as he saw fit; but after a while the worthy +gentleman seems to have thought better of his contrariness. Poindexter +had strong persuasive powers, and no doubt made himself personally +agreeable to the colonel, and, moreover, it was arranged that the +latter should occupy the same house with Mr. and Mrs. Poindexter after +they were married. Nevertheless, the colonel was not a man to move +rapidly, and the engagement had worn along for nearly a year without +the wedding-day having been fixed. One winter evening in the early part +of December, Poindexter dined with the colonel and Edith, and as the +gentlemen were sitting over their wine the lover spoke on the topic +that was uppermost in his thoughts, and asked his host whether there +was any good reason why the marriage should not be consummated at once. + +"Christmas is at hand," the young man remarked; "why should it not be +rendered doubly memorable by granting this great boon?" + +"For a parson, David, you are a deuced impatient man," the colonel +said. + +"Parsons are human," the other exclaimed with warmth. + +"Humph! I suppose some of them are. In fact, David, if I didn't believe +that there was something more in you than texts and litanies and the +Athanasian creed, I'll be hanged if I'd ever have let you look twice at +Edith. That girl has got blood in her veins, David; she's not to be +thrown away on any lantern-jawed, white-livered doctor of souls, I can +tell you." + +David held his head down, and seemed not to intend a reply; but he +suddenly raised his eyes, and fixed them upon the colonel's. "You know +what my father was," he said, in a low, distinct voice; "I am my +father's son." + +"That idea has occurred to me more than once, David, and to say the +truth, I've liked you none the less for it. But, then, what the deuce +should a fellow like you want to do in a pulpit? I respect the cloth as +much as any man, I hope, but leaving theory aside, and coming down to +practice, aren't there fools and knaves enough in the world to carry on +that business, without a fellow of heart and spirit like you going into +it?" + +"Theory or no theory, there have been as great men in the pulpit as in +any other position," said David, gloomily. + +"I don't say to the contrary: ecclesiastical history, and all that: but +what I do say is, if a man is great in the pulpit, it's a pity he isn't +somewhere else, where he could use his greatness to more advantage." + +"Well," remarked David, in the same somber tone, "I am not contented: +so much I can admit to the father of the woman I love. But you know as +well as I do that men nowadays are called to my profession not so much +by the Divine summons as by the accident of birth. Were it not for the +law of primogeniture, Colonel Saltine, the Church of England would be, +for the most part, a congregation without a clergyman." + +"Gad! I'm much of your opinion," returned the colonel, with a grin; +"but there are two doors, you know, for a second son to enter the world +by. If he doesn't fancy a cassock, he can put on His Majesty's +uniform." + +"Neither the discipline nor the activity of a soldier's life would suit +me," David answered. "So far as I know my own nature, what it craves is +freedom, and the enjoyment of its capacities. Only under such +conditions could I show what I am capable of. In other words," he +added, with a short laugh, "ten thousand a year is the profession I +should choose." + +"Ah," murmured the colonel, heaving a sigh, "I doubt that's a +profession we'd all of us like to practice as well as preach. What! no +more wine? Oh, ay, Edith, of course! Well, go to her, sir, if you must; +but when you come to my age you'll have found out which wears the best +--woman or the bottle. I'll join you presently, and maybe we'll see +what can be done about this marrying business." + +So David went to Edith, and they had a clear hour together before they +heard the colonel's slippered tread hobbling through the hall. Just +before he opened the door, David had said: "I sometimes doubt whether +you wholly love me, after all." And she had answered: + +"If I do not, it is because I sometimes feel as if you were not your +real self." + +The colonel heard nothing of this odd bit of dialogue; but when he had +subsided, with his usual grunt, into his arm-chair beside the fire- +place, and Edith had brought him his foot-stool and his pipe, and pat +the velvet skull cap on his bald pate, he drew a long whiff of tobacco +smoke, and said: + +"If you young folks want to set up housekeeping a month from to-day, +you can do it, for all I care." + +Little did any one of the three suspect what that month was destined to +bring forth. + +David Poindexter's father had been married twice, his second wife dying +within a year of her wedding-day, and two weeks after bringing David +into the world. This lady, whose maiden name was Lambert, had a brother +who was a gentleman farmer, and a tolerably successful one. His farm +was situated in the parish of Witton, and he owned a handsome house on +the outskirts of the town itself. He and David's father had been at one +time great friends, insomuch that David was named after him, and +Lambert, as his godfather as well as uncle, presented the child with +the usual silver mug. Lambert was never known to have married, but +there were rumors, dating as far as back David's earliest +recollections, to the effect that he had entertained a secret and +obscure passion for some foreign woman of great beauty, but of doubtful +character and antecedents. Nobody could be found who had ever seen this +woman, or would accept the responsibility of asserting that she +actually existed; but she afforded a convenient means of accounting for +many things that seemed mysterious in Mr. Lambert's conduct. At length, +when David was about eight years old, his godfather left England +abruptly, and without telling any one whither he was going or when he +would return. As a matter of fact he never did return, nor had any +certain news ever been heard of him since his departure. Neither his +house nor his farm was ever sold, however, though they were rented to +more than one tenant during a number of years. It was said, also, that +Lambert held possession of some valuable real estate in London. +Nevertheless, in process of time he was forgotten, or remembered only +as a name. And the new generation of men, though they might speak of +"the old Lambert House," neither knew nor cared how it happened to have +that title. For aught they could tell, it might have borne it ever +since Queen Elizabeth's time. Even David Poindexter had long ceased to +think of his uncle as anything much more substantial than a dream. + +He was all the more surprised, therefore, when, on the day following +the interview just mentioned, he received a letter from the late David +Lambert's lawyers. It informed him in substance that his uncle had died +in Constantinople, unmarried (so far as could be ascertained), +intestate, and without blood-relations surviving him. Under these +circumstances, his property, amounting to one hundred and sixty +thousand pounds, the bulk of which was invested in land and houses in +the city of London, as well as the country-seat in Witton known as the +old Lambert House, and the farm lands thereto appertaining--all this +wealth, not to mention four or five thousand pounds in ready money, +came into possession of the late David Lambert's nearest of kin, who, +as it appeared, was none other than the Reverend David Poindexter. +"Would that gentleman, therefore be kind enough, at his convenience, to +advise his obedient servants as to what disposition he wished to make +of his inheritance?" + +It was a Saturday morning, and the young clergyman was sitting at his +study table; the fire was burning in the grate at his right hand, and +his half-written sermon lay on the desk before him. After reading the +letter, at first hurriedly and amazedly, afterward more slowly, with +frequent pauses, he folded it up, and, still holding it in his hand, +leaned back in his chair, and remained for the better part of an hour +in a state of deep preoccupation. Many changing expressions passed +across his face, and glowed in his dark-blue eyes, and trembled on the +curves of his lips. At last he roused himself, sat erect, and smote the +table violently with his clinched hand. Yes, it was true it was real; +he, David Poindexter, an hour ago the poor imprisoned clergyman of the +Church of England--he, as by a stroke of magic, was free, powerful, +emancipated, the heir of seven thousand pounds a year! And what about +tomorrow's sermon? + +He rose up smiling, with a vivid color in his cheeks and a bright +sparkle in his eyes. He stretched himself to his full height, threw out +his arms, and smote his chest with both fists. What a load was gone +from his heart! What a new ardor of life was this that danced in his +veins! He walked with long strides to the window, and threw it wide +open, breathing in the rush of bright icy air with deep inhalations. +Freedom! emancipation! Yonder, above the dark, level boughs of the +cedar of Lebanon, rose the square, gray tower of the church. Yesterday +it was the incubus of his vain hopes; to-day it was the tomb of a dead +and despised past. What had David Poindexter to do with calling sinners +to repentance? Let him first find out for himself what sin was like. +Then he looked to the right, where between the leafless trees Colonel +Saltine's little dwelling raised its red-tile roof above the high +garden-wall. And so, Edith, you doubted whether I were at all times my +real self? You shall not need to make that complaint hereafter. As for +to-morrow's sermon--I am not he who wrote sermons, nor shall I ever +preach any. Away with it, therefore! + +He strode back to the table, took up the sheets of manuscript from the +desk, tore them across, and laid them on the burning coals. They +smoldered for a moment, then blazed up, and the draught from the open +window whisked the blackened ashes up the chimney. David stood, +meanwhile, with his arms folded, smiling to himself, and repeating, in +a low voice: + +"Never again--never again--never again." + +By-and-by he reseated himself at his desk, and hurriedly wrote two or +three notes, one of which was directed to Miss Saltine. He gave them to +his servant with an injunction to deliver them at their addresses +during the afternoon. Looking at his watch, he was surprised to find +that it was already past twelve o'clock. He went up-stairs, packed a +small portmanteau, made some changes in his dress, and came down again +with a buoyant step. There was a decanter half full of sherry on the +sideboard in the dining-room; he poured out and drank two glasses in +succession. This done, he put on his hat, and left the house with his +portmanteau in his hand, and ten minutes later he had intercepted the +London coach, and was bowling along on his way to the city. + +There was a dramatic instinct in David, as in many eloquent men of +impressionable temperament, which caused him every now and then to look +upon all that was occurring as a sort of play, and to resolve to act +his part in a telling and picturesque manner. On that Saturday +afternoon he had an interview with the late Mr. Lambert's lawyers, and +they were struck by his calm, lofty, and indifferent bearing. He seemed +to regard worldly prosperity as a thing beneath him, yet to feel in a +half-impatient way the responsibility which the control of wealth +forced upon him. + +"It is my purpose not to allow this legacy to interfere permanently +with my devotion to my higher duties," he remarked, "but I have taken +measures to enable myself to place these affairs upon a fixed and +convenient footing. I presume," he added, fixing his eyes steadily upon +his interlocutor, "that you have thoroughly investigated the +possibility of there being any claimant nearer than myself?" + +"No such claimant could exist," the lawyer replied, "unless the late +Mr. Lambert had married and had issue." + +"Is there, then, any reason to suppose that he contemplated the +contingency that has happened?" + +"If he bestowed any thought at all upon the subject, that contingency +could hardly have failed to present itself to his mind," the lawyer +answered. + +David consented to receive the draft for a thousand pounds which was +tendered him, and took his leave. He returned to his rooms at the +Tavistock Hotel, Covent Garden. In the evening, after making some +changes in his costume, he went to the theatre, and saw Kean play +something of Shakespeare's. When the play was over, and he was out in +the frosty air again, he felt it impossible to sleep. It was after +midnight before he returned to his hotel, with flushed cheeks, and a +peculiar brilliance in his eyes. He slept heavily, but awoke early in +the morning with a slight feeling of feverishness. It was Sunday +morning. He thought of his study in the parsonage at Witton, with its +bright fire, its simplicity, its repose. He thought of the church, and +of the congregation which he would never face again. And Edith--what +had been her thoughts and dreams during the night? He got up, and went +to the window. It looked out upon a narrow, inclosed court. The sky was +dingy, the air was full of the muffled tumult of the city. His present +state, as to its merely external aspect, was certainly not so agreeable +as that of the morning before. Ay, but what a vista had opened now +which then was closed! David dressed himself, and went down to his +breakfast. While sitting at his table in the window, looking out upon +the market-place, and stirring his cup of Mocha, a gentleman came up +and accosted him. + +"Am I mistaken, or is your name Poindexter?" + +David looked up, and recognized Harwood Courtney, a son of Lord +Derwent. Courtney was a man of fashion, a member of the great clubs, +and a man, as they say, with a reputation. He was a good twenty years +older than David, and had been the companion of the latter's father in +some of his wildest escapades. To David, at this moment, he was the +representative and symbol of that great, splendid, unregenerate world, +with which it was his purpose to make acquaintance. + +"You are not mistaken, Mr. Courtney," he said, quietly. "Have you +breakfasted? It is some time since we have met." + +"Why, yes, egad! If I remember right, you were setting out on another +road than that which I was travelling. However, we sinners, you know, +depend upon you parsons to pull us up in time to prevent any--er--any +_very_ serious catastrophe! Ha! ha!" + +"I understand you; but for my part I have left the pulpit," said David, +uttering the irrevocable words with a carelessness which he himself +wondered at. + +"By Jove!" exclaimed Courtney, with a little intonation of surprise and +curiosity, which his good breeding prevented him from formulating more +explicitly. As David made no rejoinder, he presently continued: "Then-- +er--perhaps you might find it in your way to dine with me this evening. +Only one or two friends--a very quiet Sunday party." + +"Thank you," said David. "I had intended going to bed betimes to-night; +but it will give me pleasure to meet a quiet party." + +"Then that's settled," exclaimed Courtney; "and meanwhile, if you've +finished your coffee, what do you say to a turn in the Row? I've got my +trap here, and a breath of air will freshen us up." + +David and Courtney spent the day together, and by evening the young ex- +clergyman had made the acquaintance of many of the leading men about +town. He had also allowed the fact to transpire that his pecuniary +standing was of the soundest kind; but this was done so skillfully-- +with such a lofty air--that even Courtney, who was as cynical as any +man, was by no means convinced that David's change of fortune had +anything to do with his relinquishing the pulpit. + +"David Poindexter is no fool," he remarked, confidentially, to a +friend. "He has double the stuff in him that the old fellow had. You +must get up early to get the better of a man who has been a parson, and +seen through himself!" + +David, in fact, felt himself the superior, intellectually and by +nature, of most of the men he saw. He penetrated and comprehended them, +but to them he was impenetrable; a certain air of authority rested upon +him; he had abandoned the service of God; but the training whereby he +had fitted himself for it stood him in good stead; it had developed his +insight, his subtlety, and, strange to say, his powers of +dissimulation. Contrary to what is popularly supposed, his study of the +affairs of the other world had enabled him to deal with this world's +affairs with a half-contemptuous facility. As for the minor +technicalities, the social pass-words, and so forth, to which much +importance is generally ascribed, David had nothing to fear from them; +first, because he was a man of noble manners, naturally as well as by +cultivation; and, secondly, because the fact that he had been a +clergyman acted as a sort of breastplate against criticism. It would be +thought that he chose to appear ignorant of that which he really knew. + +As for Mr. Courtney's dinner, though it may doubtless have been a quiet +one from his point of view, it differed considerably from such Sunday +festivities as David had been accustomed to. A good deal of wine was +drunk, and the conversation (a little cautious at first, on David's +account) gradually thawed into freedom. It was late when they rose from +table; and then a proposition was made to go to a certain well-known +club in St. James's Street. David went with the rest, and, for the +first time in his life, played cards for money; he lost seven hundred +pounds--more money than he had handled during the last three years--but +he kept his head, and at three o'clock in the morning drove with +Courtney to the latter's lodgings, with five hundred pounds in his +pocket over and above the sum with which he had begun to play. Here was +a wonderful change in his existence; but it did not seem to him half so +wonderful as his reason told him it was. It seemed natural--as if, +after much wandering, he had at last found his way into the place where +he belonged. It is said that savages, educated from infancy amid +civilized surroundings, will, on breathing once more their native air, +tear off their clothes and become savages again. Somewhat similar may +have been David's case, who, inheriting in a vivid degree the manly +instincts of his forefathers, had forcibly and by constraint of +circumstances lived a life wholly opposed to these impulses--an +artificial life, therefore. But now at length he had come into his +birthright, and felt at home. + +One episode of the previous evening remained in his memory: it had +produced an effect upon him out of proportion with its apparent +significance. A gentleman, a guest at the dinner, a small man with +sandy hair and keen gray eyes, on being presented to David had looked +at him with an expression of shrewd perplexity, and said: + +"Have we not met before?" + +"It is possible, but I confess I do not recollect it," replied David. + +"The name was not Poindexter," continued the other, "but the face-- +pardon me--I could have taken my oath to." + +"Where did this meeting take place?" asked David, smiling. + +"In Paris, at ----'s," said the gray-eyed gentleman (mentioning the +name of a well-known French nobleman). + +"You are quite certain, of that?" + +"Yes. It was but a month since." + +"I was never in Paris. For three years I have hardly been out of sight +of London," David answered. "What was your friend's name?" + +"It has slipped my memory," he replied. "An Italian name, I fancy. But +he was a man--pardon me--of very striking appearance, and I conversed +with him for more than an hour." + +Now it is by no means an uncommon occurrence for two persons to bear a +close resemblance to each other, but (aside from the fact that David +was anything but an ordinary-looking man) this mistake of his new +acquaintance affected him oddly. He involuntarily associated it with +the internal and external transformation which had happened to him, and +said to himself: + +"This counterpart of mine was prophetic: he was what I am to be--what I +am." And fantastic though the notion was, he could not rid himself of +it. + +David returned to Witton about the middle of the week. In the interval +he had taken measures to make known to those concerned the revolution +of his affairs, and to have the old Lambert mansion opened, and put in +some sort of condition for his reception. He had gone forth on foot, an +unknown, poor, and humble clergyman; he returned driving behind a pair +of horses, by far the most important personage in the town; and yet +this outward change was far less great than the change within. His +reception could scarcely be called cordial; though not wanting in the +technical respect and ceremony due to him as a gentleman of wealth and +influence, he could perceive a half concealed suspense and misgiving, +due unmistakably to his attitude as a recreant clergyman. + +In fact, his worthy parishioners were in a terrible quandary how to +reconcile their desire to stand well with their richest fellow- +townsman, and their dismayed recognition of that townsman's scandalous +professional conduct. David smiled at this, but it made him bitter too. +He had intended once more to call the congregation together, and +frankly to explain to them the reasons, good or bad, which had induced +him to withdraw from active labor in the church. But now he determined +to preserve a proud and indifferent silence. There was only one person +who had a right to call him to account, and it was not without +fearfulness that he looked forward to his meeting with her. However, +the sooner such fears are put at rest the better, and he called upon +Edith on the evening of his arrival. Her father had been in bed for two +days with a cold, and she was sitting alone in the little parlor. + +She rose at his entrance with a deep blush, and a look of mixed +gladness and anxiety. Her eyes swiftly noted the change in his dress, +for he had considerably modified, though not as yet wholly laid aside, +the external marks of his profession. She held back from him with a +certain strangeness and timidity, so that lie did not kiss her cheek, +but only her hand. The first words of greeting were constrained and +conventional, but at last he said: + +"All is changed, Edith, except our love for each other." + +"I do not hold you to that," she answered, quickly. + +"But you can not turn me from it," he said, with a smile. + +"I do not know you yet," said she, looking away. + +"When I last saw you, you said you doubted whether I were my real self. +I have become my real self since then." + +"Because you are not what you were, it does not follow that you are +what you should be." + +"Surely, Edith, that is not reasonable. I was what circumstances forced +me to be, henceforth I shall be what God made me." + +"Did God, then, have no hand in those circumstances?" + +"Not more, at all events, than in these." + +Edith shook her head. "God does not absolve us from holy vows." + +"But how if I can not, with loyalty to my inner conscience, hold to +those vows?" exclaimed David, with more warmth. "I have long felt that +I was not fitted for this sacred calling. Before the secret tribunal of +my self-knowledge, I have stood charged with the sin of hypocrisy. It +has been God's will that I be delivered from that sin." + +"Why did you not say that before, David?" she demanded, looking at him. +"Why did you remain a hypocrite until it was for your worldly benefit +to abandon your trust? Can you say, on your word of honor, that you +would stand where you do now if you were still poor instead of rich?" + +"Men's eyes are to some extent opened and their views are confirmed by +events. They make our dreams and forebodings into realities. We +question in our minds, and events give us the answers." + +"Such an argument might excuse any villainy," said Edith, lifting her +head indignantly. + +"Villainy! Do you use that word to me?" exclaimed David. + +"Not unless your own heart bids me--and I do not know your heart." + +"Because you do not love me?" + +"You may be right," replied Edith, striving to steady her voice; "but +at least I believed I loved you." + +"You are cured of that belief, it seems--as I am cured of many foolish +faiths," said David, with gloomy bitterness. "Well, so be it! The love +that waits upon a fastidious conscience is never the deepest love. My +love is not of that complexion. Were it possible that the shadow of +sin, or of crime itself, could descend upon you, it would but render +you dearer to me than before." + +"You may break my heart, David, if you will," cried the girl, +tremulously, yet resolutely, "but I reverence love more than I love +you." + +David had turned away as if to leave the room, but he paused and +confronted her once more. + +"At any rate, we will understand each other," said he. "Do you make it +your condition that I should go back to the ministry?" + +Edith was still seated, but the condition of the crisis compelled her +to rise. She stood before him, her dark eyes downcast, her lips +trembling, nervously drawing the fingers of one hand through the clasp +of the other. She was tempted to yield to him, for she could imagine no +happiness in life without him; but a rare sanity and integrity of mind +made her perceive that he had pushed the matter to a false alternative. +It was not a question of preaching or not preaching sermons, but of +sinful apostasy from an upright life. At last she raised her eyes, +which shone like dark jewels in her pale countenance, and said, slowly, +"We had better part." + +"Then my sins be upon your head!" cried David, passionately. + +The blood mounted to her cheeks at the injustice of this rejoinder, but +she either could not or would not answer again. She remained erect and +proud until the door had closed between them; what she did after that +neither David nor any one else knew. + +The apostate David seems to have determined that, if she were to bear +the burden of his sins, they should be neither few nor light. His life +for many weeks after this interview was a scandal and a disgrace. The +old Lambert mansion was the scene of carousals and excesses such as +recalled the exploits of the monks of Medmenham. Harwood Courtney, and +a score of dissolute gentlemen like him, not to speak of other +visitors, thronged the old house day and night; drinking, gaming, and +yet wilder doings gave the sober little town no rest, till the Reverend +David Poindexter was commonly referred to as the Wicked Parson. +Meanwhile Edith Saltine bore herself with a grave, pale impassiveness, +which some admired, others wondered at, and others deemed an indication +that she had no heart. If she had not, so much the better for her; for +her father was almost as difficult to manage as David himself. The old +gentleman could neither comprehend nor forgive what seemed to him his +daughter's immeasurable perversity. One day she had been all for +marrying a poor, unknown preacher; and the next day, when to marry him +meant to be the foremost lady in the neighborhood, she dismissed him +without appeal. And the worst of it was that, much as the poor +colonel's mouth watered at the feasts and festivities of the Lambert +mansion, he was prevented by the fatality of his position from taking +any part in them. So Edith could find no peace either at home or +abroad; and if it dwelt not in her own heart, she was indeed forlorn. + +What may have been the cost of all this dissipation it was difficult to +say, but several observant persons were of opinion that the parson's +income could not long stand it. There were rumors that he had heavy +bills owing in several quarters, which he could pay only by realizing +some of his investments. On the other hand, it was said that he played +high and constantly, and usually had the devil's luck. But it is +impossible to gauge the truth of such stories, and the Wicked Parson +himself took no pains either to deny or confirm them. He was always the +loudest, the gayest, and the most reckless of his company, and the +leader and inspirer of all their wild proceedings; but it was noticed +that, though he laughed often, he never smiled; and that his face, when +in repose, bore traces of anything but happiness. For some cause or +other, moreover--but whether maliciously or remorsefully was open to +question--he never entirely laid aside his clerical garb; he seemed +either to delight in profaning it, or to retain it as the reminder and +scourge of his own wickedness. + +One night there was a great gathering up at the mansion, and the noise +and music were kept up till well past the small hours of the morning. +Gradually the guests departed, some going toward London, some +elsewhere. At last only Harwood Courtney remained, and he and David sat +down in the empty dining-room, disorderly with the remains of the +carousal, to play picquet. They played, with short intermissions, for +nearly twenty-four hours. At last David threw down his cards, and said, +quietly: + +"Well, that's all. Give me until to-morrow." + +"With all the pleasure in life, my boy," replied the other; "and your +revenge, too, if you like. Meanwhile, the best thing we can do is to +take a nap." + +"You may do so if you please," said David; "for my part, I must take a +turn on horseback first. I can never sleep till I have breathed fresh +air." + +They parted accordingly, Courtney going to his room, and David to the +stables, whence he presently issued, mounted on his bay mare, and rode +eastward. On his way he passed Colonel Saltine's house, and drew rein +for a moment beside it, looking up at Edith's window. It was between +four and five o'clock of a morning in early April; the sky was clear, +and all was still and peaceful. As he sat in the saddle looking up, the +blind of the window was raised and the sash itself opened, and Edith, +in her white night-dress, with her heavy brown hair falling round her +face and on her shoulders, gazed out. She regarded him with a half- +bewildered expression, as if doubting of his reality, For a moment they +remained thus; then he waved his hand to her with a wild gesture of +farewell, and rode on, passing immediately out of sight behind the dark +foliage of the cedar of Lebanon. + +On reaching the London high-road the horseman paused once more, and +seemed to hesitate what course to pursue; but finally he turned to the +right, and rode in a southerly direction. The road wound gently, and +dipped and rose to cross low hills; trees bordered the way on each +side; and as the sun rose they threw long shadows westward, while the +birds warbled and twittered in the fields and hedges. By-and-by a clump +of woodland came into view about half a mile off, the road passing +through the midst of it. As David entered it at one end, he saw, +advancing toward him through the shade and sunlight, a rider mounted on +a black horse. The latter seemed to be a very spirited animal, and as +David drew near it suddenly shied and reared so violently that any but +a practiced horseman would have been unseated. No catastrophe occurred, +however, and a moment afterward the two cavaliers were face to face. No +sooner had their eyes met than, as if by a common impulse, they both +drew rein, and set staring at each other with a curiosity which merged +into astonishment. At length the stranger on the black horse gave a +short laugh, and said: + +"I perceive that the same strange thing has struck us both, sir. If you +won't consider it uncivil, I should like to know who you are. My name +is Giovanni Lambert." + +"Giovanni Lambert," repeated David, with a slight involuntary movement; +"unless I am mistaken, I have heard mention of you. But you are not +Italian?" + +"Only on my mother's side. But you have the advantage of me." + +"You will understand that I could not have heard of you without feeling +a strong desire to meet you," said David, dismounting as he spoke. "It +is, I think, the only desire left me in the world. I had marked this +wood, as I came along, as an inviting place to rest in. Would it suit +you to spend an hour here, where we can converse better at our ease +than in saddle; or does time press you? As for me, I have little more +to do with time." + +"I am at your service, sir, with pleasure," returned the other, leaping +lightly to the ground, and revealing by the movement a pair of small +pistols attached to the belt beneath his blue riding surtout. "It was +in my mind, also, to stretch my legs and take a pull at my pipe, for, +early as it is, I have ridden far this morning." + +At the point where they had halted a green lane branched off into the +depths of the wood, and down this they passed, leading their horses. +When they were out of sight of the road they made their animals fast in +such a way that they could crop the grass, and themselves reclined at +the foot of a broad-limbed oak, and they remained in converse there for +upward of an hour. + +In fact, it must been several hours later (for the sun was high in the +heavens) when one of them issued from the wood. He was mounted on a +black horse, and wore a blue surtout and high boots. After looking up +and down the road, and assuring himself that no one was in sight, he +turned his horse's head toward London, and set off at a round canter. +Coming to a cross-road, he turned to the right, and rode for an hour in +that direction, crossing the Thames near Hampton Wick. In the afternoon +he entered London from the south, and put up at an obscure hostelry. +Having seen his horse attended to, and eaten something himself, he went +to bed and slept soundly for eighteen hours. On awaking, he ate +heartily again, and spent the rest of the day in writing and arranging +a quantity of documents that were packed in his saddle-bags. The next +morning early he paid his reckoning, rode across London Bridge, and +shaped his course toward the west. + +Meanwhile the town of Witton was in vast perturbation. When Mr. Harwood +Courtney woke up late in the afternoon, and came yawning down-stairs to +get his breakfast, he learned, in answer to his inquiries, that nothing +had been seen of David Poindexter since he rode away thirteen hours +ago. Mr. Courtney expressed anxiety at this news, and dispatched his +own valet and one of David's grooms to make investigations in the +neighborhood. These two personages investigated to such good purpose +that before night the whole neighborhood was aware that David +Poindexter had disappeared. By the next morning it became evident that +something had happened to the Wicked Parson, and some people ventured +to opine that the thing which had happened to him was that he had run +away. And indeed it was astonishing to find to how many worthy people +this evil-minded parson was in debt. Every other man you met had a bill +against the Reverend David Poindexter in his pocket; and as the day +wore on, and still no tidings of the missing man were received, +individuals of the sheriff and bailiff species began to be +distinguishable amid the crowd. But the great sensation was yet to +come. How the report started no one knew, but toward supper-time it +passed from mouth to mouth that Mr. Harwood Courtney, in the course of +his twenty-four hours of picquet with Poindexter, had won from the +latter not his ready money alone, but the entire property and estates +that had accrued to him as nearest of kin to the late David Lambert. +And it was added that, as the debt was a gambling transaction, and +therefore not technically recoverable by process of law, Mr. Courtney +was naturally very anxious for his debtor to put in an appearance. Now +it so happened that this report, unlike many others ostensibly more +plausible, was true in every particular. + +Probably there was more gossip at the supper-tables of Witton that +night than in any other town of ten times the size in the United +Kingdom; and it was formally agreed that Poindexter had escaped to the +Continent, and would either remain in hiding there, or take passage by +the first opportunity to the American colonies, or the United States, +as they had now been called for some years past. Nobody defended the +reverend apostate, but, on the other hand, nobody pretended to be sorry +for Mr. Harwood Courtney; it was generally agreed that they had both of +them got what they deserved. The only question was, What was to become +of the property? Some people said it ought to belong to Edith Saltine; +but of course poetical justice of that kind was not to be expected. + +Edith, meanwhile, had kept herself strictly secluded. She was the last +person who had seen David Poindexter, but she had mentioned the fact to +no one. She was also the only person who did not believe that he had +escaped, but who felt convinced that he was dead, and that he had died +by his own hand. That gesture of farewell and of despair which he had +made to her as he vanished behind the cedar of Lebanon had for her a +significance capable of only one interpretation. Were he alive, he +would have returned. + +On the evening of the day following the events just recorded, the +solitude of her room suddenly became terrible to Edith, and she was +irresistibly impelled to dress herself and go forth in the open air. +She wound a veil about her head, and, avoiding the main thoroughfare, +slipped out of the town unperceived, and gained the free country. After +a while she found herself approaching a large tree, which spread its +branches across a narrow lane that made a short-cut to the London +highway. Beneath the tree was a natural seat, formed of a fragment of +stone, and here David and she had often met and sat. It was a mild, +still evening; she sat down on the stone, and removed her veil. The +moon, then in its first quarter, was low in the west, and shone beneath +the branches of the tree. + +Presently she was aware--though not by any sound--that some one was +approaching, and she drew back in the shadow of the tree. Down the lane +came a horseman, mounted on a tall, black horse. The outline of his +figure and the manner in which he rode fixed Edith's gaze as if by a +spell, and made the blood hum in her ears. Nearer he came, and now his +face was discernible in the level moonlight. It was impossible to +mistake that countenance: the horseman was David Poindexter. His +costume, however, was different from any he had ever before worn; there +was nothing clerical about it; nor was that black horse from the +Poindexter stables. Then, too, how noiselessly he rode!--as noiselessly +as a ghost. That, however, must have been because his horse's hoofs +fell on the soft turf. He rode slowly, and his head was bent as if in +thought; but almost before Edith could draw her breath, much less to +speak, he had passed beneath the boughs of the tree, and was riding on +toward the village. Now he had vanished in the vague light and shadow, +and a moment later Edith began to doubt whether her senses had not +played her a trick. A superstitious horror fell upon her; what she had +seen was a spirit, not living flesh and blood. She knelt down by the +stone, and remained for a long time with her face hidden upon her arms, +and her hands clasped, sometimes praying, sometimes wondering and +fearing. At last she rose to her feet, and hastened homeward through +the increasing darkness. But before she had reached her house she had +discovered that what she had seen was no ghost. The whole village was +in a fever of excitement. + +Everybody was full of the story. An hour ago who should appear riding +quietly up the village street but David Poindexter himself--at least, +if it were not he, it was the devil. He seemed to take little notice of +the astonished glances that were thrown at him, or, at any rate, not to +understand them. Instead of going to the Lambert mansion, he had +alighted at the inn, and asked the innkeeper whether he might have +lodging there. But when the innkeeper, who had known the reverend +gentleman as well as he knew his own sign-board, had addressed him by +name, the other had shaken his head, seemed perplexed, and had affirmed +that his name was not Poindexter but Lambert; and had added, upon +further inquiry, that he was the only son of David Lambert, and was +come to claim that gentleman's property, to which he was by law +entitled; in proof whereof he had produced various documents, among +them the certificates of his mother's marriage and of his own birth. As +to David Poindexter, he declared that he knew not there was such a +person; and although no man in his senses could be made to believe that +David Poindexter and this so-called Lambert were twain, and not one and +the same individual, the latter stoutly maintained his story, and vowed +that the truth would sooner or later appear and confirm him. Meanwhile, +however, one of his creditors had had him arrested for a debt of eight +hundred pounds; and Harwood Courtney had seen him, and said that he was +ready to pledge his salvation that the man was Poindexter and nobody +else. So here the matter rested for the present. But who ever heard of +so strange and audacious an attempt at imposition? The man had not even +made any effort to disguise himself further than to put on a different +suit of clothes and get another horse; and why, in the name of all that +was inconceivable, had he come back to Witton, instead of going to any +other part of the earth's surface What could he expect here, except +immediate detection, imprisonment, and ruin? Was he insane? He did not +seem to be so; but that interpretation of his conduct was not only the +most charitable one, but no other could be imagined that would account +for the facts. + +Witton slept but little that night; but who shall describe its +bewilderment when, early in the morning, a constable arrived in the +village with the news that the dead body of the Reverend David +Poindexter had been found in some woods about fifteen miles off, and +that his bay mare had been picked up grazing along the roadside not far +from home! Upon the heels of this intelligence came the corpse itself, +lying in a country wagon, and the bay mare trotting behind. It was +taken out and placed on the table in the inn parlor, where it +immediately became the center of a crowd half crazy with curiosity and +amazement. The cause of death was found to be the breaking of the +vertebral column just at the base of the neck. There was no other +injury on the body, and, allowing for the natural changes incident to +death, the face was in every particular the face of David Poindexter. +The man who called himself Lambert was now brought into the room, and +made to stand beside the corpse, which he regarded with a certain calm +interest. The resemblance between the two was minute and astonishing; +it was found to be impossible, upon that evidence alone, to decide +which was David Poindexter. + +The matter was brought to trial as promptly as possible. A great number +of witnesses identified the prisoner as David Poindexter, but those who +had seen the corpse mostly gave their evidence an opposite inclination; +and four persons (one of them the gray-eyed gentleman who has been +already mentioned) swore positively that the prisoner was Giovanni +Lambert, the gray-eyed gentleman adding that he had once met +Poindexter, and had confidently taken him to be Lambert. + +An attempt was then made to prove that Lambert had murdered Poindexter; +but it entirely failed, there being no evidence that the two men had +ever so much as met, and there being no conceivable motive for the +murder. Lambert, therefore, was permitted to enter undisturbed upon his +inheritance; for he had no difficulty in establishing the fact of the +elder Lambert's marriage to an Italian woman twenty-three years before. +The marriage had been a secret one, and soon after a violent quarrel +had taken place between the wife and husband, and they had separated. +The following month Giovanni was born prematurely. He had seen his +father but once. The quarrel was never made up, but Lambert sent his +wife, from time to time, money enough for her support. She had died +about ten years ago, and had given her son the papers to establish his +identity, telling him that the day would come to use them. Giovanni had +been a soldier, fighting against the French in Spain and elsewhere, and +had only heard of his father's death a few weeks ago. He had thereupon +come to claim his own, with the singular results that we have seen. + +Here was the end of the case, so far as the law was concerned; but the +real end of it is worth noting. Lambert, by his own voluntary act, paid +all the legal debts contracted by Poindexter, and gave Courtney, in +settlement of the gambling transaction, a sum of fifty thousand pounds. +The remainder of his fortune, which was still considerable, he devoted +almost entirely to charitable purposes, doing so much genuine good, in +a manner so hearty and unassuming, that he became the object of more +personal affection than falls to the lot of most philanthropists. He +was of a quiet, sad, and retiring disposition, and uniformly very +sparing of words. After a year or so, circumstances brought it about +that he and Miss Saltine were associated in some benevolent enterprise, +and from that time forward they often consulted together in such +matters, Lambert making her the medium of many of his benefactions. Of +course the gossips were ready to predict that it would end with a +marriage; and indeed it was impossible to see the two together (though +both of them, and especially Edith, had altered somewhat with the +passage of years) without being reminded of the former love affair in +which Lambert's double had been the hero. Did this also occur to Edith? +It could hardly have been otherwise, and it would be interesting to +speculate on her feelings in the matter; but I have only the story to +tell. At all events, they never did marry, though they became very +tender friends. At the end of seven years Colonel Saltine died of +jaundice; he had been failing in his mind for some time previous, and +had always addressed Lambert as Poindexter, and spoken of him as his +son-in-law. The year following Lambert himself died, after a brief +illness. He left all his property to Edith. She survived to her +seventieth year, making it the business of her life to carry out his +philanthropic schemes, and she always dressed in widows' weeds. After +her death, the following passage was found in one of her private +journals. It refers to her last interview with Lambert, on his death- +bed: + +".... He smiled, and said, 'You will believe, now, that I was sincere +in renouncing the ministry, though I have tried to serve the Lord in +other ways than from the pulpit.' I felt a shock in my heart, and could +hardly say, 'What do you mean, Mr. Lambert?' He replied, 'Surely, +Edith, your soul knows, if your reason does not, that I am David +Poindexter!' I could not speak. I hid my face in my hands. After a +while, in separate sentences, he told me the truth. When he rode forth +on that dreadful morning it was with the purpose to die. But he met on +the road this Giovanni Lambert, who so marvelously resembled him, and +they sat down together in the wood and talked, and Giovanni told him +all the story of his life.... As Giovanni was about to mount his horse, +which was very restive, he saw a violet in the grass, and stooped to +pick it. The horse lashed out with its heels, and struck him in the +back of the neck and killed him.... Then the idea came to David to +exchange clothes with the dead man, and to take his papers, and +personate him. Thus, he could escape from the individuality which was +his curse, and find his true self, as it were, in another person. He +said, too, that his greatest hope had been to win my love and make me +his wife; but he found that he could not bring himself to attempt that, +unless he confessed his falsehood to me, and he had feared that this +confession would turn me from him forever. I wept, and told him that my +heart had been his almost from the first, because I always thought of +him as David, and that I would have loved him through all things. He +said, 'Then God has been more merciful to me than I deserve; but, +doubtless, it is also of His mercy that we have remained unmarried.' +But I was in an agony, and could not yet be reconciled. At last he +said, 'Will you kiss me, Edith?' and afterward he said, 'My wife!' and +that was his last word. But we shall meet again!" + + + + +KEN'S MYSTERY. + + +One cool October evening--it was the last day of the month, and +unusually cool for the time of year--I made up my mind to go and spend +an hour or two with my friend Keningale. Keningale was an artist (as +well as a musical amateur and poet), and had a very delightful studio +built onto his house, in which he was wont to sit of an evening. The +studio had a cavernous fire-place, designed in imitation of the old- +fashioned fire-places of Elizabethan manor-houses, and in it, when the +temperature out-doors warranted, he would build up a cheerful fire of +dry logs. It would suit me particularly well, I thought, to go and have +a quiet pipe and chat in front of that fire with my friend. + +I had not had such a chat for a very long time--not, in fact, since +Keningale (or Ken, as his friends called him) had returned from his +visit to Europe the year before. He went abroad, as he affirmed at the +time, "for purposes of study," whereat we all smiled, for Ken, so far +as we knew him, was more likely to do anything else than to study. He +was a young fellow of buoyant temperament, lively and social in his +habits, of a brilliant and versatile mind, and possessing an income of +twelve or fifteen thousand dollars a year; he could sing, play, +scribble, and paint very cleverly, and some of his heads and figure- +pieces were really well done, considering that he never had any regular +training in art; but he was not a worker. Personally he was fine- +looking, of good height and figure, active, healthy, and with a +remarkably fine brow, and clear, full-gazing eye. Nobody was surprised +at his going to Europe, nobody expected him to do anything there except +amuse himself, and few anticipated that he would be soon again seen in +New York. He was one of the sort that find Europe agree with them. Off +he went, therefore; and in the course of a few months the rumor reached +us that he was engaged to a handsome and wealthy New York girl whom he +had met in London. This was nearly all we did hear of him until, not +very long afterward, he turned up again on Fifth Avenue, to every one's +astonishment; made no satisfactory answer to those who wanted to know +how he happened to tire so soon of the Old World; while, as to the +reported engagement, he cut short all allusion to that in so peremptory +a manner as to show that it was not a permissible topic of conversation +with him. It was surmised that the lady had jilted him; but, on the +other hand, she herself returned home not a great while after, and, +though she had plenty of opportunities, she has never married to this +day. + +Be the rights of that matter what they may, it was soon remarked that +Ken was no longer the careless and merry fellow he used to be; on the +contrary, he appeared grave, moody, averse from general society, and +habitually taciturn and undemonstrative even in the company of his most +intimate friends. Evidently something had happened to him, or he had +done something. What? Had he committed a murder? or joined the +Nihilists? or was his unsuccessful love affair at the bottom of it? +Some declared that the cloud was only temporary, and would soon pass +away. Nevertheless, up to the period of which I am writing, it had not +passed away, but had rather gathered additional gloom, and threatened +to become permanent. + +Meanwhile I had met him twice or thrice at the club, at the opera, or +in the street, but had as yet had no opportunity of regularly renewing +my acquaintance with him. We had been on a footing of more than common +intimacy in the old days, and I was not disposed to think that he would +refuse to renew the former relations now. But what I had heard and +myself seen of his changed condition imparted a stimulating tinge of +suspense or curiosity to the pleasure with which I looked forward to +the prospects of this evening. His house stood at a distance of two or +three miles beyond the general range of habitations in New York at this +time, and as I walked briskly along in the clear twilight air I had +leisure to go over in my mind all that I had known of Ken and had +divined of his character. After all, had there not always been +something in his nature--deep down, and held in abeyance by the +activity of his animal spirits--but something strange and separate, and +capable of developing under suitable conditions into--into what? As I +asked myself this question I arrived at his door; and it was with a +feeling of relief that I felt the next moment the cordial grasp of his +hand, and his voice bidding me welcome in a tone that indicated +unaffected gratification at my presence. He drew me at once into the +studio, relieved me of my hat and cane, and then put his hand on my +shoulder. + +"I am glad to see you," he repeated, with singular earnestness--"glad +to see you and to feel you; and to-night of all nights in the year." + +"Why to-night especially?" + +"Oh, never mind. It's just as well, too, you didn't let me know +beforehand you were coming; the unreadiness is all, to paraphrase the +poet. Now, with you to help me, I can drink a glass of whisky and water +and take a bit draw of the pipe. This would have been a grim night for +me if I'd been left to myself." + +"In such a lap of luxury as this, too!" said I, looking round at the +glowing fire-place, the low, luxurious chairs, and all the rich and +sumptuous fittings of the room. "I should have thought a condemned +murderer might make himself comfortable here." + +"Perhaps; but that's not exactly my category at present. But have you +forgotten what night this is? This is November-eve, when, as tradition +asserts, the dead arise and walk about, and fairies, goblins, and +spiritual beings of all kinds have more freedom and power than on any +other day of the year. One can see you've never been in Ireland." + +"I wasn't aware till now that you had been there, either." + +"Yes, I have been in Ireland. Yes--" He paused, sighed, and fell into a +reverie, from which, however, he soon roused himself by an effort, and +went to a cabinet in a corner of the room for the liquor and tobacco. +While he was thus employed I sauntered about the studio, taking note of +the various beauties, grotesquenesses, and curiosities that it +contained. Many things were there to repay study and arouse admiration; +for Ken was a good collector, having excellent taste as well as means +to back it. But, upon the whole, nothing interested me more than some +studies of a female head, roughly done in oils, and, judging from the +sequestered positions in which I found them, not intended by the artist +for exhibition or criticism. There were three or four of these studies, +all of the same face, but in different poses and costumes. In one the +head was enveloped in a dark hood, overshadowing and partly concealing +the features; in another she seemed to be peering duskily through a +latticed casement, lit by a faint moonlight; a third showed her +splendidly attired in evening costume, with jewels in her hair and +cars, and sparkling on her snowy bosom. The expressions were as various +as the poses; now it was demure penetration, now a subtle inviting +glance, now burning passion, and again a look of elfish and elusive +mockery. In whatever phase, the countenance possessed a singular and +poignant fascination, not of beauty merely, though that was very +striking, but of character and quality likewise. + +"Did you find this model abroad?" I inquired at length. "She has +evidently inspired yon, and I don't wonder at it." + +Ken, who had been mixing the punch, and had not noticed my movements, +now looked up, and said: "I didn't mean those to be seen. They don't +satisfy me, and I am going to destroy them; but I couldn't rest till +I'd made some attempts to reproduce--What was it you asked? Abroad? +Yes--or no. They were all painted here within the last six weeks." + +'"Whether they satisfy you or not, they are by far the best things of +yours I have ever seen." + +'"Well, let them alone, and tell me what you think of this beverage. To +my thinking, it goes to the right spot. It owes its existence to your +coming here. I can't drink alone, and those portraits are not company, +though, for aught I know, she might have come out of the canvas to- +night and sat down in that chair." Then, seeing my inquiring look, he +added, with a hasty laugh, "It's November-eve, you know, when anything +may happen, provided its strange enough. Well, here's to ourselves." + +We each swallowed a deep draught of the smoking and aromatic liquor, +and set down our glasses with approval. The punch was excellent. Ken +now opened a box of cigars, and we seated ourselves before the fire- +place. + +"All we need now," I remarked, after a short silence, "is a little +music. By-the-by, Ken, have you still got the banjo I gave you before +you went abroad?" + +He paused so long before replying that I supposed he had not heard my +question. "I have got it," he said, at length, "but it will never make +any more music." + +"Got broken, eh? Can't it be mended? It was a fine instrument." + +"It's not broken, but it's past mending. You shall see for yourself." + +He arose as he spoke, and going to another part of the studio, opened a +black oak coffer, and took out of it a long object wrapped up in a +piece of faded yellow silk. He handed it to me, and when I had +unwrapped it, there appeared a thing that might once have been a banjo, +but had little resemblance to one now. It bore every sign of extreme +age. The wood of the handle was honeycombed with the gnawings of worms, +and dusty with dry-rot. The parchment head was green with mold, and +hung in shriveled tatters. The hoop, which was of solid silver, was so +blackened and tarnished that it looked like dilapidated iron. The +strings were gone, and most of the tuning-screws had dropped out of +their decayed sockets. Altogether it had the appearance of having been +made before the Flood, and been forgotten in the forecastle of Noah's +Ark ever since. + +"It is a curious relic, certainly," I said. "Where did you come across +it? I had no idea that the banjo was invented so long ago as this. It +certainly can't be less than two hundred years old, and may be much +older than that." + +Ken smiled gloomily. "You are quite right," lie said; "it is at least +two hundred years old, and yet it is the very same banjo that you gave +me a year ago." + +"Hardly," I returned, smiling in my turn, "since that was made to my +order with a view to presenting it to you." + +"I know that; but the two hundred years have passed since then. Yes; it +is absurd and impossible, I know, but nothing is truer. That banjo, +which was made last year, existed in the sixteenth century, and has +been rotting ever since. Stay. Give it to me a moment, and I'll +convince you. You recollect that your name and mine, with the date, +were engraved on the silver hoop?" + +"Yes; and there was a private mark of my own there, also." + +"Very well," said Ken, who had been rubbing a place on the hoop with a +corner of the yellow silk wrapper; "look at that." + +I took the decrepit instrument from him, and examined the spot which he +had rubbed. It was incredible, sure enough; but there were the names +and the date precisely as I had caused them to be engraved; and there, +moreover, was my own private mark, which I had idly made with an old +etching point not more than eighteen months before. After convincing +myself that there was no mistake, I laid the banjo across my knees, and +stared at my friend in bewilderment. He sat smoking with a kind of grim +composure, his eyes fixed upon the blazing logs. + +"I'm mystified, I confess," said I. "Come; what is the joke? What +method have you discovered of producing the decay of centuries on this +unfortunate banjo in a few months? And why did you do it? I have heard +of an elixir to counteract the effects of time, but your recipe seems +to work the other way--to make time rush forward at two hundred times +his usual rate, in one place, while he jogs on at his usual gait +elsewhere. Unfold your mystery, magician. Seriously, Ken, how on earth +did the thing happen?" + +"I know no more about it than you do," was his reply. "Either you and I +and all the rest of the living world are insane, or else there has been +wrought a miracle as strange as any in tradition. How can I explain it? +It is a common saying--a common experience, if you will--that we may, +on certain trying or tremendous occasions, live years in one moment. +But that's a mental experience, not a physical one, and one that +applies, at all events, only to human beings, not to senseless things +of wood and metal. You imagine the thing is some trick or jugglery. If +it be, I don't know the secret of it. There's no chemical appliance +that I ever heard of that will get a piece of solid wood into that +condition in a few months, or a few years. And it wasn't done in a few +years, or a few months either. A year ago today at this very hour that +banjo was as sound as when it left the maker's hands, and twenty-four +hours afterward--I'm telling you the simple truth--it was as you see it +now." + +The gravity and earnestness with which Ken made this astounding +statement were evidently not assumed, He believed every word that he +uttered. I knew not what to think. Of course my friend might be insane, +though he betrayed none of the ordinary symptoms of mania; but, however +that might be, there was the banjo, a witness whose silent testimony +there was no gainsaying. The more I meditated on the matter the more +inconceivable did it appear. Two hundred years--twenty-four hours; +these were the terms of the proposed equation. Ken and the banjo both +affirmed that the equation had been made; all worldly knowledge and +experience affirmed it to be impossible. "What was the explanation? +What is time? What is life? I felt myself beginning to doubt the +reality of all things. And so this was the mystery which my friend had +been brooding over since his return from abroad. No wonder it had +changed him. More to be wondered at was it that it had not changed him +more. + +"Can you tell me the whole story?" I demanded at length. + +Ken quaffed another draught from his glass of whisky and water and +rubbed his hand through his thick brown beard. "I have never spoken to +any one of it heretofore," he said, "and I had never meant to speak of +it. But I'll try and give you some idea of what it was. You know me +better than any one else; you'll understand the thing as far as it can +ever be understood, and perhaps I may be relieved of some of the +oppression it has caused me. For it is rather a ghastly memory to +grapple with alone, I can tell you." + +Hereupon, without further preface, Ken related the following tale. He +was, I may observe in passing, a naturally fine narrator. There were +deep, lingering tones in his voice, and he could strikingly enhance the +comic or pathetic effect of a sentence by dwelling here and there upon +some syllable. His features were equally susceptible of humorous and of +solemn expressions, and his eyes were in form and hue wonderfully +adapted to showing great varieties of emotion. Their mournful aspect +was extremely earnest and affecting; and when Ken was giving utterance +to some mysterious passage of the tale they had a doubtful, melancholy, +exploring look which appealed irresistibly to the imagination. But the +interest of his story was too pressing to allow of noticing these +incidental embellishments at the time, though they doubtless had their +influence upon me all the same. + +"I left New York on an Inman Line steamer, you remember," began Ken, +"and landed at Havre. I went the usual round of sight-seeing on the +Continent, and got round to London in July, at the height of the +season. I had good introductions, and met any number of agreeable and +famous people. Among others was a young lady, a countrywoman of my own +--you know whom I mean--who interested me very much, and before her +family left London she and I were engaged. We parted there for the +time, because she had the Continental trip still to make, while I +wanted to take the opportunity to visit the north of England and +Ireland. I landed at Dublin about the 1st of October, and, zigzagging +about the country, I found myself in County Cork about two weeks later. + +"There is in that region some of the most lovely scenery that human +eyes ever rested on, and it seems to be less known to tourists than +many places of infinitely less picturesque value. A lonely region too: +during my rambles I met not a single stranger like myself, and few +enough natives. It seems incredible that so beautiful a country should +be so deserted. After walking a dozen Irish miles you come across a +group of two or three one-roomed cottages, and, like as not, one or +more of those will have the roof off and the walls in ruins. The few +peasants whom one sees, however, are affable and hospitable, especially +when they hear you are from that terrestrial heaven whither most of +their friends and relatives have gone before them. They seem simple and +primitive enough at first sight, and yet they are as strange and +incomprehensible a race as any in the world. They are as superstitious, +as credulous of marvels, fairies, magicians, and omens, as the men whom +St. Patrick preached to, and at the same time they are shrewd, +skeptical, sensible, and bottomless liars. Upon the whole, I met with +no nation on my travels whose company I enjoyed so much, or who +inspired me with so much kindliness, curiosity, and repugnance. + +"At length I got to a place on the sea-coast, which I will not further +specify than to say that it is not many miles from Ballymacheen, on the +south shore. I have seen Venice and Naples, I have driven along the +Cornice Road, I have spent a month at our own Mount Desert, and I say +that all of them together are not so beautiful as this glowing, deep- +hued, soft-gleaming, silvery-lighted, ancient harbor and town, with the +tall hills crowding round it and the black cliffs and headlands +planting their iron feet in the blue, transparent sea. It is a very old +place, and has had a history which it has outlived ages since. It may +once have had two or three thousand inhabitants; it has scarce five or +six hundred to day. Half the houses are in ruins or have disappeared; +many of the remainder are standing empty. All the people are poor, most +of them abjectly so; they saunter about with bare feet and uncovered +heads, the women in quaint black or dark-blue cloaks, the men in such +anomalous attire as only an Irishman knows how to get together, the +children half naked. The only comfortable-looking people are the monks +and the priests, and the soldiers in the fort. For there is a fort +there, constructed on the huge ruins of one which may have done duty in +the reign of Edward the Black Prince, or earlier, in whose mossy +embrasures are mounted a couple of cannon, which occasionally sent a +practice-shot or two at the cliff on the other side of the harbor. The +garrison consists of a dozen men and three or four officers and non- +commissioned officers. I suppose they are relieved occasionally, but +those I saw seemed to have become component parts of their +surroundings. + +"I put up at a wonderful little old inn, the only one in the place, and +took my meals in a dining-saloon fifteen feet by nine, with a portrait +of George I (a print varnished to preserve it) hanging over the mantel- +piece. On the second evening after dinner a young gentleman came in-- +the dining-saloon being public property of course--and ordered some +bread and cheese and a bottle of Dublin stout. We presently fell into +talk; he turned out to be an officer from the fort, Lieutenant +O'Connor, and a fine young specimen of the Irish soldier he was. After +telling me all he knew about the town, the surrounding country, his +friends, and himself, he intimated a readiness to sympathize with +whatever tale I might choose to pour into his ear; and I had pleasure +in trying to rival his own outspokenness. We became excellent friends; +we had up a half-pint of Kinahan's whisky, and the lieutenant expressed +himself in terms of high praise of my countrymen, my country, and my +own particular cigars. When it became time for him to depart I +accompanied him--for there was a splendid moon abroad--and bade him +farewell at the fort entrance, having promised to come over the next +day and make the acquaintance of the other fellows. 'And mind your eye, +now, going back, my dear boy,' he called out, as I turned my face +homeward. 'Faith, 'tis a spooky place, that graveyard, and you'll as +likely meet the black woman there as anywhere else!' + +"The graveyard was a forlorn and barren spot on the hill-side, just the +hither side of the fort: thirty or forty rough head-stones, few of +which retained any semblance of the perpendicular, while many were so +shattered and decayed as to seem nothing more than irregular natural +projections from the ground. Who the black woman might be I knew not, +and did not stay to inquire. I had never been subject to ghostly +apprehensions, and as a matter of fact, though the path I had to follow +was in places very bad going, not to mention a hap-hazard scramble over +a ruined bridge that covered a deep-lying brook, I reached my inn +without any adventure whatever. + +"The next day I kept my appointment at the fort, and found no reason to +regret it; and my friendly sentiments were abundantly reciprocated, +thanks more especially, perhaps, to the success of my banjo, which I +carried with me, and which was as novel as it was popular with those +who listened to it. The chief personages in the social circle besides +my friend the lieutenant were Major Molloy, who was in command, a racy +and juicy old campaigner, with a face like a sunset, and the surgeon, +Dr. Dudeen, a long, dry, humorous genius, with a wealth of anecdotical +and traditional lore at his command that I have never seen surpassed. +We had a jolly time of it, and it was the precursor of many more like +it. The remains of October slipped away rapidly, and I was obliged to +remember that I was a traveler in Europe, and not a resident in +Ireland. The major, the surgeon, and the lieutenant all protested +cordially against my proposed departure, but, as there was no help for +it, they arranged a farewell dinner to take place in the fort on All- +halloween. + +"I wish you could have been at that dinner with me! It was the essence +of Irish good-fellowship. Dr. Dudeen was in great force; the major was +better than the best of Lever's novels; the lieutenant was overflowing +with hearty good-humor, merry chaff, and sentimental rhapsodies anent +this or the other pretty girl of the neighborhood. For my part I made +the banjo ring as it had never rung before, and the others joined in +the chorus with a mellow strength of lungs such as you don't often hear +outside of Ireland. Among the stories that Dr. Dudeen regaled us with +was one about the Kern of Querin and his wife, Ethelind Fionguala-- +which being interpreted signifies 'the white-shouldered.' The lady, it +appears, was originally betrothed to one O'Connor (here the lieutenant +smacked his lips), but was stolen away on the wedding night by a party +of vampires, who, it would seem, were at that period a prominent +feature among the troubles of Ireland. But as they were bearing her +along--she being unconscious--to that supper where she was not to eat +but to be eaten, the young Kern of Querin, who happened to be out duck- +shooting, met the party, and emptied his gun at it. The vampires fled, +and the Kern carried the fair lady, still in a state of insensibility, +to his house. 'And by the same token, Mr. Keningale,' observed the +doctor, knocking the ashes out of his pipe, 'ye're after passing that +very house on your way here. The one with the dark archway underneath +it, and the big mullioned window at the corner, ye recollect, hanging +over the street as I might say--' + +"'Go 'long wid the house, Dr. Dudeen, dear,' interrupted the +lieutenant; 'sure can't you see we're all dying to know what happened +to sweet Miss Fionguala, God be good to her, when I was after getting +her safe up-stairs--' + +"'Faith, then, I can tell ye that myself, Mr. O'Connor,' exclaimed the +major, imparting a rotary motion to the remnants of whisky in his +tumbler. ''Tis a question to be solved on general principles, as +Colonel O'Halloran said that time he was asked what he'd do if he'd +been the Book o' Wellington, and the Prussians hadn't come up in the +nick o' time at Waterloo. 'Faith,' says the colonel, 'I'll tell ye--' + +"'Arrah, then, major, why would ye be interruptin' the doctor, and Mr. +Keningale there lettin' his glass stay empty till he hears--The Lord +save us! the bottle's empty!' + +"In the excitement consequent upon this discovery, the thread of the +doctor's story was lost; and before it could be recovered the evening +had advanced so far that I felt obliged to withdraw. It took some time +to make my proposition heard and comprehended; and a still longer time +to put it in execution; so that it was fully midnight before I found +myself standing in the cool pure air outside the fort, with the +farewells of my boon companions ringing in my ears. + +"Considering that it had been rather a wet evening in-doors, I was in a +remarkably good state of preservation, and I therefore ascribed it +rather to the roughness of the road than to the smoothness of the +liquor, when, after advancing a few rods, I stumbled and fell. As I +picked myself up I fancied I had heard a laugh, and supposed that the +lieutenant, who had accompanied me to the gate, was making merry over +my mishap; but on looking round I saw that the gate was closed and no +one was visible. The laugh, moreover, had seemed to be close at hand, +and to be even pitched in a key that was rather feminine than +masculine. Of course I must have been deceived; nobody was near me: my +imagination had played me a trick, or else there was more truth than +poetry in the tradition that Halloween is the carnival-time of +disembodied spirits. It did not occur to me at the time that a stumble +is held by the superstitious Irish to be an evil omen, and had I +remembered it it would only have been to laugh at it. At all events, I +was physically none the worse for my fall, and I resumed my way +immediately. + +"But the path was singularly difficult to find, or rather the path I +was following did not seem to be the right one. I did not recognize it; +I could have sworn (except I knew the contrary) that I had never seen +it before. The moon had risen, though her light was as yet obscured by +clouds, but neither my immediate surroundings nor the general aspect of +the region appeared familiar. Dark, silent hill-sides mounted up on +either hand, and the road, for the most part, plunged downward, as if +to conduct me into the bowels of the earth. The place was alive with +strange echoes, so that at times I seemed to be walking through the +midst of muttering voices and mysterious whispers, and a wild, faint +sound of laughter seemed ever and anon to reverberate among the passes +of the hills. Currents of colder air sighing up through narrow defiles +and dark crevices touched my face as with airy fingers. A certain +feeling of anxiety and insecurity began to take possession of me, +though there was no definable cause for it, unless that I might be +belated in getting home. With the perverse instinct of those who are +lost I hastened my steps, but was impelled now and then to glance back +over my shoulder, with a sensation of being pursued. But no living +creature was in sight. The moon, however, had now risen higher, and the +clouds that were drifting slowly across the sky flung into the naked +valley dusky shadows, which occasionally assumed shapes that looked +like the vague semblance of gigantic human forms. + +"How long I had been hurrying onward I know not, when, with a kind of +suddenness, I found myself approaching a graveyard. It was situated on +the spur of a hill, and there was no fence around it, nor anything to +protect it from the incursions of passers-by. There was something in +the general appearance of this spot that made me half fancy I had seen +it before; and I should have taken it to be the same that I had often +noticed on my way to the fort, but that the latter was only a few +hundred yards distant therefrom, whereas I must have traversed several +miles at least. As I drew near, moreover, I observed that the head- +stones did not appear so ancient and decayed as those of the other. But +what chiefly attracted my attention was the figure that was leaning or +half sitting upon one of the largest of the upright slabs near the +road. It was a female figure draped in black, and a closer inspection-- +for I was soon within a few yards of her--showed that she wore the +calla, or long hooded cloak, the most common as well as the most +ancient garment of Irish women, and doubtless of Spanish origin. + +"I was a trifle startled by this apparition, so unexpected as it was, +and so strange did it seem that any human creature should be at that +hour of the night in so desolate and sinister a place. Involuntarily I +paused as I came opposite her, and gazed at her intently. But the +moonlight fell behind her, and the deep hood of her cloak so completely +shadowed her face that I was unable to discern anything but the sparkle +of a pair of eyes, which appeared to be returning my gaze with much +vivacity. + +"'You seem to be at home here,' I said, at length. 'Can you tell me +where I am?' + +"Hereupon the mysterious personage broke into a light laugh, which, +though in itself musical and agreeable, was of a timbre and intonation +that caused my heart to beat rather faster than my late pedestrian +exertions warranted; for it was the identical laugh (or so my +imagination persuaded me) that had echoed in my ears as I arose from my +tumble an hour or two ago. For the rest, it was the laugh of a young +woman, and presumably of a pretty one; and yet it had a wild, airy, +mocking quality, that seemed hardly human at all, or not, at any rate, +characteristic of a being of affections and limitations like unto ours. +But this impression of mine was fostered, no doubt, by the unusual and +uncanny circumstances of the occasion. + +"'Sure, sir,' said she, 'you're at the grave of Ethelind Fionguala.' + +"As she spoke she rose to her feet, and pointed to the inscription on +the stone. I bent forward, and was able, without much difficulty, to +decipher the name, and a date which indicated that the occupant of the +grave must have entered the disembodied state between two and three +centuries ago. + +"'And who are you?' was my next question. + +"'I'm called Elsie,' she replied. 'But where would your honor be going +November-eve?' + +"I mentioned my destination, and asked her whether she could direct me +thither. + +"'Indeed, then, 'tis there I'm going myself,' Elsie replied; 'and if +your honor'll follow me, and play me a tune on the pretty instrument, +'tisn't long we'll be on the road.' + +"She pointed to the banjo which I carried wrapped up under my arm. How +she knew that it was a musical instrument I could not imagine; +possibly, I thought, she may have seen me playing on it as I strolled +about the environs of the town. Be that as it may, I offered no +opposition to the bargain, and further intimated that I would reward +her more substantially on our arrival. At that she laughed again, and +made a peculiar gesture with her hand above her head. I uncovered my +banjo, swept my fingers across the strings, and struck into a fantastic +dance-measure, to the music of which we proceeded along the path, Elsie +slightly in advance, her feet keeping time to the airy measure. In +fact, she trod so lightly, with an elastic, undulating movement, that +with a little more it seemed as if she might float onward like a +spirit. The extreme whiteness of her feet attracted my eye, and I was +surprised to find that instead of being bare, as I had supposed, these +were incased in white satin slippers quaintly embroidered with gold +thread. + +"'Elsie,' said I, lengthening my steps so as to come up with her, +'where do you live, and what do you do for a living?' + +"'Sure, I live by myself,' she answered; 'and if you'd be after knowing +how, you must come and see for yourself.' + +"'Are you in the habit of walking over the hills at night in shoes like +that?' + +"'And why would I not?' she asked, in her turn. 'And where did your +honor get the pretty gold ring on your finger?' + +"The ring, which was of no great intrinsic value, had struck my eye in +an old curiosity-shop in Cork. It was an antique of very old-fashioned +design, and might have belonged (as the vender assured me was the case) +to one of the early kings or queens of Ireland. + +"'Do you like it?' said I. + +"'Will your honor be after making a present of it to Elsie?' she +returned, with an insinuating tone and turn of the head. + +"'Maybe I will, Elsie, on one condition. I am an artist; I make +pictures of people. If you will promise to come to my studio and let me +paint your portrait, I'll give you the ring, and some money besides.' + +"'And will you give me the ring now?' said Elsie. + +"'Yes, if you'll promise.' + +"'And will you play the music to me?' she continued. + +"'As much as you like.' + +"'But maybe I'll not be handsome enough for ye,' said she, with a +glance of her eyes beneath the dark hood. + +"'I'll take the risk of that,' I answered, laughing, 'though, all the +same, I don't mind taking a peep beforehand to remember you by.' So +saying, I put forth a hand to draw back the concealing hood. But Elsie +eluded me, I scarce know how, and laughed a third time, with the same +airy, mocking cadence. + +"'Give me the ring first, and then you shall see me,' she said, +coaxingly. + +"'Stretch out your hand, then,' returned I, removing the ring from my +finger. 'When we are better acquainted, Elsie, you won't be so +suspicious.' + +"She held out a slender, delicate hand, on the forefinger of which I +slipped the ring. As I did so, the folds of her cloak fell a little +apart, affording me a glimpse of a white shoulder and of a dress that +seemed in that deceptive semi-darkness to be wrought of rich and costly +material; and I caught, too, or so I fancied, the frosty sparkle of +precious stones. + +"'Arrah, mind where ye tread!' said Elsie, in a sudden, sharp tone. + +"I looked round, and became aware for the first time that we were +standing near the middle of a ruined bridge which spanned a rapid +stream that flowed at a considerable depth below. The parapet of the +bridge on one side was broken down, and I must have been, in fact, in +imminent danger of stepping over into empty air. I made my way +cautiously across the decaying structure; but, when I turned to assist +Elsie, she was nowhere to be seen. + +"What had become of the girl? I called, but no answer came. I gazed +about on every side, but no trace of her was visible. Unless she had +plunged into the narrow abyss at my feet, there was no place where she +could have concealed herself--none at least that I could discover. She +had vanished, nevertheless; and since her disappearance must have been +premeditated, I finally came to the conclusion that it was useless to +attempt to find her. She would present herself again in her own good +time, or not at all. She had given me the slip very cleverly, and I +must make the best of it. The adventure was perhaps worth the ring. + +"On resuming my way, I was not a little relieved to find that I once +more knew where I was. The bridge that I had just crossed was none +other than the one I mentioned some time back; I was within a mile of +the town, and my way lay clear before me. The moon, moreover, had now +quite dispersed the clouds, and shone down with exquisite brilliance. +Whatever her other failings, Elsie had been a trustworthy guide; she +had brought me out of the depth of elf-land into the material world +again. It had been a singular adventure, certainly; and I mused over it +with a sense of mysterious pleasure as I sauntered along, humming +snatches of airs, and accompanying myself on the strings. Hark! what +light step was that behind me? It sounded like Elsie's; but no, Elsie +was not there. The same impression or hallucination, however, recurred +several times before I reached the outskirts of the town--the tread of +an airy foot behind or beside my own. The fancy did not make me +nervous; on the contrary, I was pleased with the notion of being thus +haunted, and gave myself up to a romantic and genial vein of reverie. + +"After passing one or two roofless and moss-grown cottages, I entered +the narrow and rambling street which leads through the town. This +street a short distance down widens a little, as if to afford the +wayfarer space to observe a remarkable old house that stands on the +northern side. The house was built of stone, and in a noble style of +architecture; it reminded me somewhat of certain palaces of the old +Italian nobility that I had seen on the Continent, and it may very +probably have been built by one of the Italian or Spanish immigrants of +the sixteenth or seventeenth century. The molding of the projecting +windows and arched doorway was richly carved, and upon the front of the +building was an escutcheon wrought in high relief, though I could not +make out the purport of the device. The moonlight falling upon this +picturesque pile enhanced all its beauties, and at the same time made +it seem like a vision that might dissolve away when the light ceased to +shine. I must often have seen the house before, and yet I retained no +definite recollection of it; I had never until now examined it with my +eyes open, so to speak. Leaning against the wall on the opposite side +of the street, I contemplated it for a long while at my leisure. The +window at the corner was really a very fine and massive affair. It +projected over the pavement below, throwing a heavy shadow aslant; the +frames of the diamond-paned lattices were heavily mullioned. How often +in past ages had that lattice been pushed open by some fair hand, +revealing to a lover waiting beneath in the moonlight the charming +countenance of his high-born mistress! Those were brave days. They had +passed away long since. The great house had stood empty for who could +tell how many years; only bats and vermin were its inhabitants. Where +now were those who had built it? and who were they? Probably the very +name of them was forgotten. + +"As I continued to stare upward, however, a conjecture presented itself +to my mind which rapidly ripened into a conviction. Was not this the +house that Dr. Dudeen had described that very evening as having been +formerly the abode of the Kern of Querin and his mysterious bride? +There was the projecting window, the arched doorway. Yes, beyond a +doubt this was the very house. I emitted a low exclamation of renewed +interest and pleasure, and my speculations took a still more +imaginative, but also a more definite turn. + +"What had been the fate of that lovely lady after the Kern had brought +her home insensible in his arms? Did she recover, and were they married +and made happy ever after; or had the sequel been a tragic one? I +remembered to have read that the victims of vampires generally became +vampires themselves. Then my thoughts went back to that grave on the +hill-side. Surely that was unconsecrated ground. Why had they buried +her there? Ethelind of the white shoulder! Ah! why had not I lived in +those days; or why might not some magic cause them to live again for +me? Then would I seek this street at midnight, and standing here +beneath her window, I would lightly touch the strings of my bandore +until the casement opened cautiously and she looked down. A sweet +vision indeed! And what prevented my realizing it? Only a matter of a +couple of centuries or so. And was time, then, at which poets and +philosophers sneer, so rigid and real a matter that a little faith and +imagination might not overcome it? At all events, I had my banjo, the +bandore's legitimate and lineal descendant, and the memory of Fionguala +should have the love-ditty. + +"Hereupon, having retuned the instrument, I launched forth into an old +Spanish love-song, which I had met with in some moldy library during my +travels, and had set to music of my own. I sang low, for the deserted +street re-echoed the lightest sound, and what I sang must reach only my +lady's ears. The words were warm with the fire of the ancient Spanish +chivalry, and I threw into their expression all the passion of the +lovers of romance. Surely Fionguala, the white-shouldered, would hear, +and awaken from her sleep of centuries, and come to the latticed +casement and look down! Hist! see yonder! What light--what shadow is +that that seems to flit from room to room within the abandoned house, +and now approaches the mullioned window? Are my eyes dazzled by the +play of the moonlight, or does the casement move--does it open? Nay, +this is no delusion; there is no error of the senses here. There is +simply a woman, young, beautiful, and richly attired, bending forward +from the window, and silently beckoning me to approach. + +"Too much amazed to be conscious of amazement, I advanced until I stood +directly beneath the casement, and the lady's face, as she stooped +toward me, was not more than twice a man's height from my own. She +smiled and kissed her finger-tips; something white fluttered in her +hand, then fell through the air to the ground at my feet. The next +moment she had withdrawn, and I heard the lattice close. I picked up +what she had let fall; it was a delicate lace handkerchief, +tied to the handle of an elaborately wrought bronze key. It was +evidently the key of the house, and invited me to enter. I loosened it +from the handkerchief, which bore a faint, delicious perfume, like the +aroma of flowers in an ancient garden, and turned to the arched +doorway. I felt no misgiving, and scarcely any sense of strangeness. +All was as I had wished it to be, and as it should be; the mediaeval +age was alive once more, and as for myself, I almost felt the velvet +cloak hanging from my shoulder and the long rapier dangling at my belt. +Standing in front of the door I thrust the key into the lock, turned +it, and felt the bolt yield. The next instant the door was opened, +apparently from within; I stepped across the threshold, the door closed +again, and I was alone in the house, and in darkness. + +"Not alone, however! As I extended my hand to grope my way it was met +by another hand, soft, slender, and cold, which insinuated itself +gently into mine and drew me forward. Forward I went, nothing loath; +the darkness was impenetrable, but I could hear the light rustle of a +dress close to me, and the same delicious perfume that had emanated +from the handkerchief enriched the air that I breathed, while the +little hand that clasped and was clasped by my own alternately +tightened and half relaxed the hold of its soft cold fingers. In this +manner, and treading lightly, we traversed what I presumed to be a +long, irregular passageway, and ascended a staircase. Then another +corridor, until finally we paused, a door opened, emitting a flood of +soft light, into which we entered, still hand in hand. The darkness and +the doubt were at an end. + +"The room was of imposing dimensions, and was furnished and decorated +in a style of antique splendor. The walls were draped with mellow hues +of tapestry; clusters of candles burned in polished silver sconces, and +were reflected and multiplied in tall mirrors placed in the four +corners of the room. The heavy beams of the dark oaken ceiling crossed +each other in squares, and were laboriously carved; the curtains and +the drapery of the chairs were of heavy-figured damask. At one end of +the room was a broad ottoman, and in front of it a table, on which was +set forth, in massive silver dishes, a sumptuous repast, with wines in +crystal beakers. At the side was a vast and deep fire-place, with space +enough on the broad hearth to burn whole trunks of trees. No fire, +however, was there, but only a great heap of dead embers; and the room, +for all its magnificence, was cold--cold as a tomb, or as my lady's +hand--and it sent a subtle chill creeping to my heart. + +"But my lady! how fair she was! I gave but a passing glance at the +room; my eyes and my thoughts were all for her. She was dressed in +white, like a bride; diamonds sparkled in her dark hair and on her +snowy bosom; her lovely face and slender lips were pale, and all the +paler for the dusky glow of her eyes. She gazed at me with a strange, +elusive smile; and yet there was, in her aspect and bearing, something +familiar in the midst of strangeness, like the burden of a song heard +long ago and recalled among other conditions and surroundings. It +seemed to me that something in me recognized her and knew her, had +known her always. She was the woman of whom I had dreamed, whom I had +beheld in visions, whose voice and face had haunted me from boyhood up. +Whether we had ever met before, as human beings meet, I knew not; +perhaps I had been blindly seeking her all over the world, and she had +been awaiting me in this splendid room, sitting by those dead embers +until all the warmth had gone out of her blood, only to be restored by +the heat with which my love might supply her. + +"'I thought you had forgotten me,' she said, nodding as if in answer to +my thought. 'The night was so late--our one night of the year! How my +heart rejoiced when I heard your dear voice singing the song I know so +well! Kiss me--my lips are cold!' + +"Cold indeed they were--cold as the lips of death. But the warmth of my +own seemed to revive them. They were now tinged with a faint color, and +in her cheeks also appeared a delicate shade of pink. She drew fuller +breath, as one who recovers from a long lethargy. Was it my life that +was feeding her? I was ready to give her all. She drew me to the table +and pointed to the viands and the wine. + +"'Eat and drink,' she said. 'You have traveled far, and you need food.' + +"'Will you eat and drink with me?' said I, pouring out the wine. + +"'You are the only nourishment I want,' was her answer.' This wine is +thin and cold. Give me wine as red as your blood and as warm, and I +will drain a goblet to the dregs.' + +"At these words, I know not why, a slight shiver passed through me. She +seemed to gain vitality and strength at every instant, but the chill of +the great room struck into me more and more. + +"She broke into a fantastic flow of spirits, clapping her hands, and +dancing about me like a child. Who was she? And was I myself, or was +she mocking mo when she implied that we had belonged to each other of +old? At length she stood still before me, crossing her hands over her +breast. I saw upon the forefinger of her right hand the gleam of an +antique ring. + +"'Where did you get that ring?' I demanded. + +"She shook her head and laughed. 'Have you been faithful?' she asked. +'It is my ring; it is the ring that unites us; it is the ring you gave +me when you loved me first. It is the ring of the Kern--the fairy ring, +and I am your Ethelind--Ethelind Fionguala.' + +"'So be it,' I said, casting aside all doubt and fear, and yielding +myself wholly to the spell of her inscrutable eyes and wooing lips. +'You are mine, and I am yours, and let us be happy while the hours +last.' + +"'You are mine, and I am yours,' she repeated, nodding her head with an +elfish smile. 'Come and sit beside me, and sing that sweet song again +that you sang to me so long ago. Ah, now I shall live a hundred years.' + +"We seated ourselves on the ottoman, and while she nestled luxuriously +among the cushions, I took my banjo and sang to her. The song and the +music resounded through the lofty room, and came back in throbbing +echoes. And before me as I sang I saw the face and form of Ethelind +Fionguala, in her jeweled bridal dress, gazing at me with burning eyes. +She was pale no longer, but ruddy and warm, and life was like a flame +within her. It was I who had become cold and bloodless, yet with the +last life that was in me I would have sung to her of love that can +never die. But at length my eyes grew dim, the room seemed to darken, +the form of Ethelind alternately brightened and waxed indistinct, like +the last flickerings of a fire; I swayed toward her, and felt myself +lapsing into unconsciousness, with my head resting on her white +shoulder." + +Here Keningale paused a few moments in his story, flung a fresh log +upon the fire, and then continued: + +"I awoke, I know not how long afterward. I was in a vast, empty room in +a ruined building. Rotten shreds of drapery depended from the walls, +and heavy festoons of spiders' webs gray with dust covered the windows, +which were destitute of glass or sash; they had been boarded up with +rough planks which had themselves become rotten with age, and admitted +through their holes and crevices pallid rays of light and chilly +draughts of air. A bat, disturbed by these rays or by my own movement, +detached himself from his hold on a remnant of moldy tapestry near me, +and after circling dizzily around my head, wheeled the flickering +noiselessness of his flight into a darker corner. As I arose unsteadily +from the heap of miscellaneous rubbish on which I had been lying, +something which had been resting across my knees fell to the floor with +a rattle. I picked it up, and found it to be my banjo--as you see it +now. + +"Well, that is all I have to tell. My health was seriously impaired; +all the blood seemed to have been drawn out of my veins; I was pale and +haggard, and the chill--Ah, that chill," murmured Keningale, drawing +nearer to the fire, and spreading out his hands to catch the warmth--" +I shall never get over it; I shall carry it to my grave." + + + + +"WHEN HALF-GODS GO, THE GODS ARRIVE." + + +"What a beautiful girl!" said Mr. Ambrose Drayton to himself; "and how +much she looks like--" He cut the comparison short, and turned his eyes +seaward, pulling at his mustache meditatively the while. + +"This American atmosphere, fresh and pure as it is in the nostrils, is +heavy-laden with reminiscences," his thoughts ran on. "Reminiscences, +but always with differences, the chief difference being, no doubt, in +myself. And no wonder. Nineteen years; yes, it's positively nineteen +years since I stood here and gazed out through yonder gap between the +headlands. Nineteen years of foreign lands, foreign men and manners, +the courts, the camps, the schools; adventure, business, and pleasure-- +if I may lightly use so mysterious a word. Nineteen and twenty are +thirty-nine; in my case say sixty at least. Why, a girl like that +lovely young thing walking away there with her light step and her +innocent heart would take me to be sixty to a dead certainty. A rather +well-preserved man of sixty--that's how she'd describe me to the young +fellow she's given her heart to. Well, sixty or forty, what difference? +When a man has passed the age at which he falls in love, he is the peer +of Methuselah from that time forth. But what a fiery season that of +love is while it lasts! Ay, and it burns something out of the soul that +never grows again. And well that it should do so: a susceptible heart +is a troublesome burden to lug round the world. Curious that I should +be even thinking of such things: association, I suppose. Here it was +that we met and here we parted. But what a different place it was then! +A lovely cape, half bleak moorland and half shaggy wood, a few rocky +headlands and a great many coots and gulls, and one solitary old +farmhouse standing just where that spick-and-span summer hotel, with +its balconies and cupolas, stands now. So it was nineteen years ago, +and so it may be again, perhaps, nine hundred years hence; but +meanwhile, what a pretty array of modern aesthetic cottages, and plank +walks, and bridges, and bathing-houses, and pleasure-boats! And what an +admirable concourse of well-dressed and pleasurably inclined men and +women! After all, my countrymen are the finest-looking and most +prosperous-appearing people on the globe. They have traveled a little +faster than I have, and on a somewhat different track; but I would +rather be among them than anywhere else. Yes, I won't go back to +London, nor yet to Paris, or Calcutta, or Cairo. I'll buy a cottage +here at Squittig Point, and live and die here and in New York. I wonder +whether Mary is alive and mother of a dozen children, or--not!" + +"Auntie," said Miss Leithe to her relative, as they regained the +veranda of their cottage after their morning stroll on the beach, "who +was that gentleman who looked at us?" + +"Hey?--who?" inquired the widow of the late Mr. Corwin, absently. + +"The one in the thin gray suit and Panama hat; you must have seen him. +A very distinguished-looking man and yet very simple and pleasant; +like some of those nice middle-aged men that you see in 'Punch,' +slenderly built, with handsome chin and eyes, and thick mustache and +whiskers. Oh, auntie, why do you never notice things? I think a man +between forty and fifty is ever so much nicer than when they're +younger. They know how to be courteous, and they're not afraid of being +natural. I mean this one looks as if he would. But he must be somebody +remarkable in some way--don't you think so? There's something about +him--something graceful and gentle and refined and manly--that makes +most other men seem common beside him. Who do you suppose he can be?" + +"Who?--what have you been saying, my dear?" inquired Aunt Corwin, +rousing herself from the perusal of a letter. "Here's Sarah writes that +Frank Redmond was to sail from Havre the 20th; so he won't be here for +a week or ten days yet." + +"Well, he might not have come at all," said the girl, coloring +slightly. "I'm sure I didn't think he would, when he went away." + +"You are both of you a year older and wiser," said the widow, +meditatively; "and you have learned, I hope, not to irritate a man +needlessly. I never irritated Corwin in all my life. They don't +understand it." + +"Here comes Mr. Haymaker," observed Miss Leithe. "I shall ask him." + +"Don't ask him in," said Mrs. Corwin, retiring; "he chatters like an +organ-grinder." + +"Oh, good-morning, Miss Mary!" exclaimed Mr. Haymaker, as he mounted +the steps of the veranda, with his hands extended and his customary +effusion. "How charming you are looking after your bath and your walk +and all! Did you ever see such a charming morning? I never was at a +place I liked so much as Squittig Point; the new Newport, I call it-- +eh? the new Newport. So fashionable already, and only been going, as +one might say, three or four years! Such charming people here! Oh, by- +the-way, whom do you think I ran across just now? You wouldn't know +him, though--been abroad since before you were born, I should think. +Most charming man I ever met, and awfully wealthy. Ran across him in +Europe--Paris, I think it was--stop! or was it Vienna? Well, never +mind. Drayton, that's his name; ever hear of him? Ambrose Drayton. Made +a great fortune in the tea-trade; or was it in the mines? I've +forgotten. Well, no matter. Great traveler, too--Africa and the Corea, +and all that sort of thing; and fought under Garibaldi, they say; and +he had the charge of some diplomatic affair at Pekin once. The +quietest, most gentlemanly fellow you ever saw. Oh, you must meet him. +He's come back to stay, and will probably spend the summer here. I'll +get him and introduce him. Oh, he'll be charmed--we all shall." + +"What sort of a looking person is he?" Miss Leithe inquired. + +"Oh, charming--just right! Trifle above medium height; rather lighter +weight than I am, but graceful; grayish hair, heavy mustache, blue +eyes; style of a retired English colonel, rather. You know what I mean +--trifle reticent, but charming manners. Stop! there he goes now--see +him? Just stopping to light a cigar--in a line with the light-house. +Now he's thrown away the match, and walking on again. That's Ambrose +Drayton. Introduce him on the sands this afternoon. How is your good +aunt to-day? So sorry not to have seen her! Well, I must be off; +awfully busy to-day. Good-by, my dear Miss Mary; see you this +afternoon. Good-by. Oh, make my compliments to your good aunt, won't +you? Thanks. So charmed! _Au revoir_." + +"Has that fool gone?" demanded a voice from within. + +"Yes, Auntie," the young lady answered. + +"Then come in to your dinner," the voice rejoined, accompanied by the +sound of a chair being drawn up to a table and sat down upon. Mary +Leithe, after casting a glance after the retreating figure of Mr. +Haymaker and another toward the light-house, passed slowly through the +wire-net doors and disappeared. + +Mr. Drayton had perforce engaged his accommodations at the hotel, all +the cottages being either private property or rented, and was likewise +constrained, therefore, to eat his dinner in public. But Mr. Drayton +was not a hater of his species, nor a fearer of it; and though he had +not acquired precisely our American habits and customs, he was disposed +to be as little strange to them as possible. Accordingly, when the gong +sounded, he entered the large dining-room with great intrepidity. The +arrangement of tables was not continuous, but many small tables, +capable of accommodating from two to six, were dotted about everywhere. +Mr. Drayton established himself at the smallest of them, situated in a +part of the room whence he had a view not only of the room itself, but +of the blue sea and yellow rocks on the other side. This preliminary +feat of generalship accomplished, he took a folded dollar bill from his +pocket and silently held it up in the air, the result being the speedy +capture of a waiter and the introduction of dinner. + +But at this juncture Mr. Haymaker came pitching into the room, as his +nature was, and pinned himself to a standstill, as it were, with his +eyeglass, in the central aisle of tables. Drayton at once gave himself +up for lost, and therefore received Mr. Haymaker with kindness and +serenity when, a minute or two later, he came plunging up, in his usual +ecstasy of sputtering amiability, and seated himself in the chair at +the other side of the table with an air as if everything were charming +in the most charming of all possible worlds, and he himself the most +charming person in it. + +"My dear Drayton, though," exclaimed Mr. Haymaker, in the interval +between the soup and the bluefish, "there is some one here you must +know--most charming girl you ever knew in your life, and has set her +heart on knowing you. We were talking about you this morning--Miss Mary +Leithe. Lovely name, too; pity ever to change it--he! he! he! Why, you +must have seen her about here; has an old aunt, widow of Jim Corwin, +who's dead and gone these five years. You recognize her, of course?" + +"Not as you describe her," said Mr. Drayton, helping his friend to +fish. + +"Oh, the handsomest girl about here; tallish, wavy brown hair, soft +brown eyes, the loveliest-shaped eyes in the world, my dear fellow; +complexion like a Titian, figure slender yet, but promising. A way of +giving you her hand that makes you wish she would take your heart," +pursued Mr. Haymaker, impetuously filling his mouth with bluefish, +during the disposal of which he lost the thread of his harangue. +Drayton, however, seemed disposed to recover it for him. + +"Is this young lady from New England?" he inquired. + +"New-Yorker by birth," responded the ever-vivacious Haymaker; "father a +Southern man; mother a Bostonian. Father died eight or nine years after +marriage; mother survived him six years; girl left in care of old Mrs. +Corwin--good old creature, but vague--very vague. Don't fancy the +marriage was a very fortunate one; a little friction, more or less. +Leithe was rather a wild, unreliable sort of man; Mrs. Leithe a woman +not easily influenced--immensely charming, though, and all that, but a +trifle narrow and set. Well, you know, it was this way: Leithe was an +immensely wealthy man when she married him; lost his money, struggled +along, good deal of friction; Mrs. Leithe probably felt she had made a +mistake, and that sort of thing. But Miss Mary here, very different +style, looks like her mother, but softer; more in her, too. Very little +money, poor girl, but charming. Oh! you must know her." + +"What did you say her mother's maiden name was?" + +"Maiden name? Let me see. Why--oh, no--oh, yes--Cleveland, Mary +Cleveland." + +"Mary Cleveland, of Boston; married Hamilton Leithe, about nineteen +years ago. I used to know the lady. And this is her daughter! And Mary +Cleveland is dead!--Help yourself, Haymaker. I never take more than one +course at this hour of the day." + +"But you must let me introduce you, you know," mumbled Haymaker, +through his succotash. + +"I hardly know," said Drayton, rubbing his mustache. "Pardon me if I +leave you," he added, looking at his watch. "It is later than I +thought." + +Nothing more was seen of Drayton for the rest of that day. But the next +morning, as Mary Leithe sat on the Bowlder Rock, with a book on her +lap, and her eyes on the bathers, and her thoughts elsewhere, she heard +a light, leisurely tread behind her, and a gentlemanly, effective +figure made its appearance, carrying a malacca walking-stick, and a +small telescope in a leather case slung over the shoulder. + +"Good-morning, Miss Leithe," said this personage, in a quiet and +pleasant voice. "I knew your mother before you were born, and I can not +feel like a stranger toward her daughter. My name is Ambrose Drayton. +You look something like your mother, I think." + +"I think I remember mamma's having spoken of you," said Mary Leithe, +looking up a little shyly, but with a smile that was the most winning +of her many winning manifestations. Her upper lip, short, but somewhat +fuller than the lower one, was always alive with delicate movements; +the corners of her mouth were blunt, the teeth small; and the smile was +such as Psyche's might have been when Cupid waked her with a kiss. + +"It was here I first met your mother," continued Drayton, taking his +place beside her. "We often sat together on this very rock. I was a +young fellow then, scarcely older than you, and very full of romance +and enthusiasm. Your mother--". He paused a moment, looking at his +companion with a grave smile in his eyes. "If I had been as dear to her +as she was to me," he went on, "you would have been our daughter." + +Mary looked out upon the bathers, and upon the azure bay, and into her +own virgin heart. "Are you married, too?" she asked at length. + +"I was cut out for an old bachelor, and I have been true to my +destiny," was his reply. "Besides, I've lived abroad till a month or +two ago, and good Americans don't marry foreign wives." + +"I should like to go abroad," said Mary Leithe. + +"It is the privilege of Americans," said Drayton. "Other people are +born abroad, and never know the delight of real travel. But, after all, +America is best. The life of the world culminates here. We are the prow +of the vessel; there may be more comfort amidships, but we are the +first to touch the unknown seas. And the foremost men of all nations +are foremost only in so far as they are at heart American; that is to +say, America is, at present, even more an idea and a principle than it +is a country. The nation has perhaps not yet risen to the height of its +opportunities. So you have never crossed the Atlantic?" + +"No; my father never wanted to go; and after he died, mamma could not." + +"Well, our American Emerson says, you know, that, as the good of travel +respects only the mind, we need not depend for it on railways and +steamboats." + +"It seems to me, if we never moved ourselves, our minds would never +really move either." + +"Where would you most care to go?" + +"To Rome, and Jerusalem, and Egypt, and London." + +"Why?" + +"They seem like parts of my mind that I shall never know unless I visit +them." + +"Is there no part of the world that answers to your heart?" + +"Oh, the beautiful parts everywhere, I suppose." + +"I can well believe it," said Drayton, but with so much simplicity and +straightforwardness that Mary Leithe's cheeks scarcely changed color. +"And there is beauty enough here," he added, after a pause. + +"Yes; I have always liked this place," said she, "though the cottages +seem a pity." + +"You knew the old farm-house, then?" + +"Oh, yes; I used to play in the farm-yard when I was a little girl. +After my father died, Mamma used to come here every year. And my aunt +has a cottage here now. You haven't met my aunt, Mr. Drayton?" + +"I wished to know you first. But now I want to know her, and to become +one of the family. There is no one left, I find, who belongs to me. +What would you think of me for a bachelor uncle?" + +"I would like it very much," said Mary, with a smile. + +"Then let us begin," returned Drayton. + +Several days passed away very pleasantly. Never was there a bachelor +uncle so charming, as Haymaker would have said, as Drayton. The kind of +life in the midst of which he found himself was altogether novel and +delightful to him. In some aspects it was like enjoying for the first +time a part of his existence which he should have enjoyed in youth, but +had missed; and in many ways he doubtless enjoyed it more now than he +would have done then, for he brought it to a maturity of experience +which had taught him the inestimable value of simple things; a quiet +nobility of character and clearness of knowledge that enabled him to +perceive and follow the right course in small things as in great; a +serene yet cordial temperament that rendered him the cheerfulest and +most trustworthy of companions; a generous and masculine disposition, +as able to direct as to comply; and years which could sympathize +impartially with youth and age, and supply something which each lacked. +He, meanwhile, sometimes seemed to himself to be walking in a dream. +The region in which he was living, changed, yet so familiar, the +thought of being once more, after so many years of homeless wandering, +in his own land and among his own countrymen, and the companionship of +Mary Leithe, like, yet so unlike, the Mary Cleveland he had known and +loved, possessing in reality all the tenderness and lovely virginal +sweetness that he had imagined in the other, with a warmth of heart +that rejuvenated his own, and a depth and freshness of mind answering +to the wisdom that he had drawn from experience, and rendering her, +though in her different and feminine sphere, his equal--all these +things made Drayton feel as if he would either awake and find them the +phantasmagoria of a beautiful dream, or as if the past time were the +dream, and this the reality. Certainly, in this ardent, penetrating +light of the present, the past looked vaporous and dim, like a range of +mountains scaled long ago and vanishing on the horizon. + +And was this all? Doubtless it was, at first. It was natural that +Drayton should regard with peculiar tenderness the daughter of the +woman he had loved. She was an orphan, and poor; he was alone in the +world, with no one dependent upon him, and with wealth which could find +no better use than to afford this girl the opportunities and the +enjoyments which she else must lack. His anticipations in returning to +America had been somewhat cold and vague. It was his native land; but +abstract patriotism is, after all, rather chilly diet for a human being +to feed his heart upon. The unexpected apparition of Mary Leithe had +provided just that vividness and particularity that were wanting. +Insensibly Drayton bestowed upon her all the essence of the love of +country which he had cherished untainted throughout his long exile. It +was so much easier and simpler a thing to know and appreciate her than +to do as much for the United States and their fifty million +inhabitants, national, political, and social, that it is no wonder if +Drayton, as a modest and sane gentleman, preferred to make the former +the symbol of the latter--of all, at least, that was good and lovable +therein. At the same time, so clear-headed a man could scarcely have +failed to be aware that his affection for Mary Leithe was not actually +dependent upon the fact of her being an emblem. Upon what, then, was it +dependent? Upon her being the daughter of Mary Cleveland? It was true +that he had loved Mary Cleveland; but she had deliberately jilted him +to marry a wealthier man, and was therefore connected with and +responsible for the most painful as well as the most pleasurable +episode of his early life. Mary Leithe bore some personal resemblance +to her mother; but had she been as like her in character and +disposition as she was in figure and feature, would Drayton, knowing +what he knew, have felt drawn toward her? A man does not remain for +twenty years under the influence of an unreasonable and mistaken +passion. Drayton certainly had not, although his disappointment had +kept him a bachelor all his life, and altered the whole course of his +existence. But when we have once embarked upon a certain career, we +continue in it long after the motive which started us has been +forgotten. No; Drayton's regard for Mary Leithe must stand on its own +basis, independent of all other considerations. + +What, in the next place, was the nature of this regard? Was it merely +avuncular, or something different? Drayton assured himself that it was +the former. He was a man of the world, and had done with passions. The +idea of his falling in love made him smile in a deprecatory manner. +That the object of such love should be a girl eighteen years his junior +rendered the suggestion yet more irrational. She was lustrous with +lovable qualities, which he genially recognized and appreciated; nay, +he might love her, but the love would be a quasi-paternal one, not the +love that demands absolute possession and brooks no rivalry. His +attitude was contemplative and beneficent, not selfish and exclusive. +His greatest pleasure would be to see her married to some one worthy of +her. Meantime he might devote himself to her freely and without fear. + +And yet, once again, was he not the dupe of himself and of a +convention? Was his the mood in which an uncle studies his niece, or +even a father his daughter? How often during the day was she absent +from his thoughts, or from his dreams at night? What else gave him so +much happiness as to please her, and what would he not do to give her +pleasure? Why was he dissatisfied and aimless when not in her presence? +Why so full-orbed and complete when she was near? He was eighteen years +the elder, but there was in her a fullness of nature, a balanced +development, which went far toward annulling the discrepancy. Moreover, +though she was young, he was not old, and surely he had the knowledge, +the resources, and the will to make her life happy. There would be, he +fancied, a certain poetical justice in such an issue. It would +illustrate the slow, seemingly severe, but really tender wisdom of +Providence. Out of the very ashes of his dead hopes would arise this +gracious flower of promise. She would afford him scope for the +employment of all those riches, moral and material, which life had +brought him; she would be his reward for having lived honorably and +purely for purity's and honor's sake. But why multiply reasons? There +was justification enough; and true love knows nothing of justification. +He loved her, then; and now, did she love him? This was the real +problem--the mystery of a maiden's heart, which all Solomon's wisdom +and Bacon's logic fail to elucidate. Drayton did what he could. Once he +came to her with the news that he must be absent from an excursion +which they had planned, and he saw genuine disappointment darken her +sweet face, and her slender figure seem to droop. This was well as far +as it went, but beyond that it proved nothing. Another time he gave her +a curious little shell which he had picked up while they were rambling +together along the beach, and some time afterward he accidently noticed +that she was wearing it by a ribbon round her neck. This seemed better. +Again, on a night when there was a social gathering at the hotel, he +entered the room and sat apart at one of the windows, and as long as he +remained there he felt that her gaze was upon him, and twice or thrice +when he raised his eyes they were met by hers, and she smiled; and +afterward, when he was speaking near her, he noticed that she +disregarded what her companion of the moment was saying to her, and +listened only to him. Was not all this encouragement? Nevertheless, +whenever, presuming upon this, he hazarded less ambiguous +demonstrations, she seemed to shrink back and appear strange and +troubled. This behavior perplexed him; he doubted the evidence that had +given him hope; feared that he was a fool; that she divined his love, +and pitied him, and would have him, if at all, only out of pity. +Thereupon he took himself sternly to task, and resolved to give her up. + +It was a transparent July afternoon, with white and gray clouds +drifting across a clear blue sky, and a southwesterly breeze roughening +the dark waves and showing their white shoulders. Mary Leithe and +Drayton came slowly along the rocks, he assisting her to climb or +descend the more rugged places, and occasionally pausing with her to +watch the white canvas of a yacht shiver in the breeze as she went +about, or to question whether yonder flash amid the waves, where the +gulls were hovering and dipping, were a bluefish breaking water. At +length they reached a little nook in the seaward face, which, by often +resorting to it, they had in a manner made their own. It was a small +shelf in the rock, spacious enough for two to sit in at ease, with a +back to lean against, and at one side a bit of level ledge which served +as a stand or table. Before them was the sea, which, at high-water +mark, rose to within three yards of their feet; while from the +shoreward side they were concealed by the ascending wall of sandstone. +Drayton had brought a cushion with him, which he arranged in Mary's +seat; and when they had established themselves, he took a volume of +Emerson's poems from his pocket and laid it on the rock beside him. + +"Are you comfortable?" he asked. + +"Yes; I wish it would be always like this--the weather, and the sun, +and the time--so that we might stay here forever." + +"Forever is the least useful word in human language," observed Drayton. +"In the perspective of time, a few hours, or days, or years, seem alike +inconsiderable." + +"But it is not the same to our hearts, which live forever," she +returned. + +"The life of the heart is love," said Drayton. + +"And that lasts forever," said Mary Leithe. + +"True love lasts, but the object changes," was his reply. + +"It seems to change sometimes," said she. + +"But I think it is only our perception that is misled. We think we have +found what we love; but afterward, perhaps, we find it was not in the +person we supposed, but in some other. Then we love it in him; not +because our heart has changed, but just because it has not." + +"Has that been your experience?" Drayton asked, with a smile. + +"Oh, I was speaking generally," she said, looking down. + +"It may be the truth; but if so, it is a perilous thing to be loved." + +"Perilous?" + +"Why, yes. How can the lover be sure that he really is what his +mistress takes him for? After all, a man has and is nothing in himself. +His life, his love, his goodness, such as they are, flow into him from +his Creator, in such measure as he is capable or desirous of receiving +them. And he may receive more at one time than at another. How shall he +know when he may lose the talismanic virtue that won her love--even +supposing he ever possessed it?" + +"I don't know how to argue," said Mary Leithe; "I can only feel when a +thing is true or not--or when I think it is--and say what I feel." + +"Well, I am wise enough to trust the truth of your feeling before any +argument." + +This assertion somewhat disconcerted Mary Leithe, who never liked to be +confronted with her own shadow, so to speak. However, she seemed +resolved on this occasion to give fuller utterance than usual to what +was in her mind; so, after a pause, she continued, "It is not only how +much we are capable of receiving from God, but the peculiar way in +which each one of us shows what is in him, that makes the difference in +people. It is not the talisman so much as the manner of using it that +wins a girl's love. And she may think one manner good until she comes +to know that another is better." + +"And, later, that another is better still?" + +"You trust my feeling less than you thought, you see," said Mary, +blushing, and with a tremor of her lips. + +"Perhaps I am afraid of trusting it too much," Drayton replied, fixing +his eyes upon her. Then he went on, with a changed tone and manner: +"This metaphysical discussion of ours reminds me of one of Emerson's +poems, whose book, by-the-by, I brought with me. Have you ever read +them?" + +"Very few of them," said Mary; "I don't seem to belong to them." + +"Not many people can eat them raw, I imagine," rejoined Drayton, +laughing. "They must be masticated by the mind before they can nourish +the heart, and some of them--However, the one I am thinking of is very +beautiful, take it how you will. It is called, 'Give all to Love.' Do +you know it!" + +Mary shook her head. + +"Then listen to it," said Drayton, and he read the poem to her. "What +do you think of it?" he asked when he had ended. + +"It is very short," said Mary, "and it is certainly beautiful; but I +don't understand some parts of it, and I don't think I like some other +parts." + +"It is a true poem," returned Drayton; "it has a body and a soul; the +body is beautiful, but the soul is more beautiful still; and where the +body seems incomplete, the soul is most nearly perfect. Be loyal, it +says, to the highest good you know; follow it through all difficulties +and dangers; make it the core of your heart and the life of your soul; +and yet, be free of it! For the hour may always be at hand when that +good that you have lived for and lived in must be given up. And then-- +what says the poet? + + "'Though thou loved her as thyself, + As a self of purer clay, + Though her parting dims the day, + Stealing grace from all alive, + Heartily know, + When half-gods go, + The gods arrive.'" + +There was something ominous in Drayton's tone, quiet and pleasant +though it sounded to the ear, and Mary could not speak; she knew that +he would speak again, and that his words would bring the issue finally +before her. + +He shut the book and put it in his pocket. For some time he remained +silent, gazing eastward across the waves, which came from afar to break +against the rock at their feet. A small white pyramidal object stood up +against the horizon verge, and upon this Drayton's attention appeared +to be concentrated. + +"If you should ever decide to come," he said at length, "and want the +services of a courier who knows the ground well, I shall be at your +disposal." + +"Come where?" she said, falteringly. + +"Eastward. To Europe." + +"You will go with me?" + +"Hardly that. But I shall be there to receive you." + +"You are going back?" + +"In a month, or thereabouts." + +"Oh, Mr. Drayton! Why?" + +"Well, for several reasons. My coming here was an experiment. It might +have succeeded, but it was made too late. I am too old for this young +country. I love it, but I can be of no service to it. On the contrary, +so far as I was anything, I should be in the way. It does not need me, +and I have been an exile so long as to have lost my right to inflict +myself upon it. Yet I am glad to have been here; the little time that I +have been here has recompensed me for all the sorrows of my life, and I +shall never forget an hour of it as long as I live." + +"Are you quite sure that your country does not want you--need you?" + +"I should not like my assurance to be made more sure." + +"How can you know? Who has told you? Whom have you asked?" + +"There are some questions which it is not wise to put; questions whose +answers may seem ungracious to give, and are sad to hear." + +"But the answer might not seem so. And how can it be given until you +ask it?" + +Drayton turned and looked at her. His face was losing its resolute +composure, and there was a glow in his eyes and in his cheeks that +called up an answering warmth in her own. + +"Do you know where my country is?" he demanded, almost sternly. + +"It is where you are loved and wanted most, is it not?" she said, +breathlessly. + +"Do not deceive yourself--nor me!" exclaimed Drayton, putting out his +hand toward her, and half rising from the rock. "There is only one +thing more to say." + +A sea-gull flew close by them, and swept on, and in a moment was far +away, and lost to sight. So in our lives does happiness come so near us +as almost to brush our cheeks with its wings, and then pass on, and +become as unattainable as the stars. As Mary Leithe was about to speak, +a shadow cast from above fell across her face and figure. She seemed to +feel a sort of chill from it, warm though the day was; and without +moving her eyes from Drayton's face to see whence the shadow came, her +expression underwent a subtle and sudden change, losing the fervor of a +moment before, and becoming relaxed and dismayed. But after a moment +Drayton looked up, and immediately rose to his feet, exclaiming, "Frank +Redmond!" + +On the rock just above them stood a young man, dark of complexion, with +eager eyes, and a figure athletic and strong. As Drayton spoke his +name, his countenance assumed an expression half-way between pleased +surprise and jealous suspicion. Meanwhile Mary Leithe had covered her +face with her hands. + +"I'm sure I'd no idea you were here, Mr. Drayton," said the young man. +"I was looking for Mary Leithe. Is that she?" + +Mary uncovered her face, and rose to her feet languidly. She did not as +yet look toward Redmond, but she said in a low voice, "How do you do, +Frank? You--came so suddenly!" + +"I didn't stop to think--that I might interrupt you," said he, drawing +back a little and lifting his head. + +Drayton had been observing the two intently, breathing constrainedly +the while, and grasping a jutting point of rock with his hand as he +stood. He now said, in a genial and matter-of-fact voice, "Well, Master +Frank, I shall have an account to settle with you when you and my niece +have got through your first greetings." + +"Mary your niece!" cried Redmond, bewildered. + +"My niece by courtesy; her mother was a dear friend of mine before Mary +was born. And now it appears that she is the young lady, the dearest +and loveliest ever heard of, about whom you used to rhapsodize to me in +Dresden! Why didn't you tell me her name? By Jove, you young rogue, +I've a good mind to refuse my consent to the match! What if I had +married her off to some other young fellow, and you been left in the +lurch! However, luckily for you, I haven't been able thus far to find +any one who in my opinion--How do you do, Frank? You--came so +suddenly!" + +"I didn't stop to think--that I might interrupt you," said he, drawing +back a little and lifting his head. + +Drayton had been observing the two intently, breathing constrainedly +the while, and grasping a jutting point of rock with his hand as he +stood. He now said, in a genial and matter-of-fact voice, "Well, Master +Frank, I shall have an account to settle with you when you and my niece +have got through your first greetings." + +"Mary your niece!" cried Redmond, bewildered. + +"My niece by courtesy; her mother was a dear friend of mine before Mary +was born. And now it appears that she is the young lady, the dearest +and loveliest ever heard of, about whom you used to rhapsodize to me in +Dresden! Why didn't you tell me her name? By Jove, you young rogue, +I've a good mind to refuse my consent to the match! What if I had +married her off to some other young fellow, and you been left in the +lurch! However, luckily for you, I haven't been able thus far to find +any one who in my opinion would suit her better. Come down here and +shake hands, Frank, and then I'll leave you to make your excuses to +Miss Leithe. And the next time you come back to her after a year's +absence, don't frighten her heart into her mouth by springing out on +her like a jack-in-the-box. Send a bunch of flowers or a signet-ring to +tell her you are coming, or you may get a cooler reception than you'd +like!" + +"Ah! Ambrose Drayton," he sighed to himself as he clambered down the +rocks alone, and sauntered along the shore, "there is no fool like an +old fool. Where were your eyes that you couldn't have seen what was the +matter? Her heart was fighting against itself all the time, poor child! +And you, selfish brute, bringing to bear on her all your antiquated +charms and fascinations--Heaven save the mark!--and bullying her into +the belief that you could make her happy! Thank God, Ambrose Drayton, +that your awakening did not come too late. A minute more would have +made her and you miserable for life--and Redmond too, confound him! And +yet they might have told me; one of them might have told me, surely. +Even at my age it is hard to remember one's own insignificance. And I +did love her! God knows how I loved her! I hope he loves her as much; +but how can he help it! And she--she won't remember long! An old fellow +who made believe he was her uncle, and made rather a fool of himself; +went back to Europe, and never been heard of since. Ah, me!" + +"Where did you get acquainted with Mr. Drayton, Frank?" + +"At Dresden. It was during the vacation at Freiberg last winter, and I +had come over to Dresden to have a good time. We stayed at the same +hotel. We played a game of billiards together, and he chatted with me +about America, and asked me about my mining studies at Freiberg; and I +thought him about the best fellow I'd ever met. But I didn't know then +--I hadn't any conception what a splendid fellow he really was. If ever +I hear anybody talking of their ideal of a gentleman, I shall ask them +if they ever met Ambrose Drayton." + +"What did he do?" + +"Well, the story isn't much to my credit; if it hadn't been for him, +you might never have heard of me again; and it will serve me right to +confess the whole thing to you. It's about a--woman." + +"What sort of a woman?" + +"She called herself a countess; but there's no telling what she really +was. I only know she got me into a fearful scrape, and if it hadn't +been for Mr. Drayton--" + +"Did you do anything wrong, Frank?" + +"No; upon my honor as a gentleman! If I had, Mary, I wouldn't be here +now." + +Mary looked at him with a sad face. "Of course I believe you, Frank," +she said. "But I think I would rather not hear any more about it." + +"Well, I'll only tell you what Mr. Drayton did. I told him all about it +--how it began, and how it went on, and all; and how I was engaged to a +girl in America--I didn't tell him your name; and I wasn't sure, then, +whether you'd ever marry me, after all; because, you know, you had been +awfully angry with me before I went away, because I wanted to study in +Europe instead of staying at home. But, you see, I've got my diploma, +and that'll give me a better start than I ever should have had if I'd +only studied here. However--what was I saying? Oh! so he said he would +find out about the countess, and talk to her himself. And how he +managed I don't know; and he gave me a tremendous hauling over the +coals for having been such an idiot; but it seems that instead of being +a poor injured, deceived creature, with a broken heart, and all that +sort of thing, she was a regular adventuress--an old hand at it, and +had got lots of money out of other fellows for fear she would make a +row. But Mr. Drayton had an interview with her. I was there, and I +never shall forget it if I live to a hundred. You never saw anybody so +quiet, so courteous, so resolute, and so immitigably stern as he was. +And yet he seemed to be stern only against the wrong she was trying to +do, and to be feeling kindness and compassion for her all the time. She +tried everything she knew, but it wasn't a bit of use, and at last she +broke down and cried, and carried on like a child. Then Mr. Drayton +took her out of the room, and I don't know what happened, but I've +always suspected that he sent her off with money enough in her pocket +to become an honest woman with if she chose to; but he never would +admit it to me. He came back to me after a while, and told me to have +nothing more to do with any woman, good or bad except the woman I +meant to marry, and I promised him I wouldn't, and I kept my promise. +But we have him to thank for our happiness, Mary." + +Tears came silently into Mary's eyes; she said nothing, but sat with +her hands clasped around one knee, gazing seaward. + +"You don't seem very happy, though," pursued Redmond, after a pause; +"and you acted so oddly when I first found you and Mr. Drayton +together--I almost thought--well, I didn't know what to think. You do +love me, don't you?" + +For a few moments Mary Leithe sat quite motionless, save for a slight +tremor of the nerves that pervaded her whole body; and then, all at +once, she melted into sobs. Redmond could not imagine what was the +matter with her; but he put his arms round her, and after a little +hesitation or resistance, the girl hid her face upon his shoulder, and +wept for the secret that she would never tell. + +But Mary Leithe's nature was not a stubborn one, and easily adapted +itself to the influences with which she was most closely in contact. +When she and Redmond presented themselves at Aunt Corwin's cottage that +evening her tears were dried, and only a tender dimness of the eyes and +a droop of her sweet mouth betrayed that she had shed any. + +"Mr. Drayton wanted to be remembered to you, Mary," observed Aunt +Corwin, shortly before going to bed. She had been floating colored sea- +weeds on paper all the time since supper, and had scarcely spoken a +dozen words. + +"Has he gone?" Mary asked. + +"Who? Oh, yes; he had a telegram, I believe. His trunks were to follow +him. He said he would write. I liked that man. He was not like Mr. +Haymaker; he was a gentleman. He took an interest in my collections, +and gave me several nice specimens. Your mother was a fool not to have +married him. I wish you could have married him yourself. But it was not +to be expected that he would care for a child like you, even if your +head were not turned by that Frank Redmond. How soon shall you let him +marry you?" + +"Whenever he likes," answered Mary Leithe, turning away. + +As a matter of fact, they were married the following winter. A week +before the ceremony a letter arrived for Mary from New York, addressed +in a legal hand. It contained an intimation that, in accordance with +the instructions of their client, Mr. Ambrose Drayton, the undersigned +had placed to her account the sum of fifty thousand dollars as a +preliminary bequest, it being the intention of Mr. Drayton to make her +his heir. There was an inclosure from Drayton himself, which Mary, +after a moment's hesitation, placed in her lover's hand, and bade him +break the seal. + +It contained only a few lines, wishing happiness to the bride and +bridegroom, and hoping they all might meet in Europe, should the +wedding trip extend so far. "And as for you, my dear niece," continued +the writer, "whenever you think of me remember that little poem of +Emerson's that we read on the rocks the last time I saw you. The longer +I live the more of truth do I find in it, especially in the last verse: + + "'Heartily know, + When half-gods go, + The gods arrive!'" + +"What does that mean?" demanded Redmond, looking up from the letter. + +"We can not know except by experience," answered Mary Leithe. + + + + +"SET NOT THY FOOT ON GRAVES." + + +_New York_, _April 29th_.--Last night I came upon this +passage in my old author: "Friend, take it sadly home to thee--Age and +Youthe are strangers still. Youthe, being ignorant of the wisdome of +Age, which is Experience, but wise with its own wisdome, which is of +the unshackeled Soule, or Intuition, is great in Enterprise, but slack +in Achievement. Holding itself equal to all attempts and conditions, +and to be heir, not of its own spanne of yeares and compasse of +Faculties only, but of all time and all Human Nature--such, I saye, +being its illusion (if, indeede, it be illusion, and not in some sorte +a Truth), it still underrateth the value of Opportunitie, and, in the +vain beleefe that the City of its Expectation is paved with Golde and +walled with Precious Stones, letteth slip betwixt its fingers those +diamondes and treasures which ironical Fate offereth it.... But see +nowe what the case is when this youthe becometh in yeares. For nowe he +can nowise understand what defecte of Judgmente (or effecte of +insanitie rather) did leade him so to despise and, as it were, reject +those Giftes and golden chaunces which come but once to mortal men. +Experience (that saturnine Pedagogue) hath taught him what manner of +man he is, and that, farre from enjoying that Deceptive Seeminge or +mirage of Freedome which would persuade him that he may run hither and +thither as the whim prompteth over the face of the Earthe--yea, take +the wings of the morninge and winnowe his aerie way to the Pleiadies-- +he must e'en plod heavilie and with paine along that single and narrowe +Path whereto the limitations of his personal nature and profession +confine him--happy if he arrive with muche diligence and faire credit +at the ende thereof, and falle not ignobly by the way. Neverthelesse-- +for so great is the infatuation of man, who, although he acquireth all +other knowledge, yet arriveth not at the knowledge of Himself--if to +the Sage of Experience he proffered once again the gauds and prizes of +youthe, which he hath ever since regretted and longed for--what doeth +he in his wisdome? Verilie, so longe as the matter remaineth _in +nubibis_, as the Latins say, or in the Region of the Imagination, as +oure speeche hath it, he will beleeve, yea, take his oathe, that he +still is master of all those capacities and energies whiche, in his +youthe, would have prompted and enabled him to profit by this desired +occurrence. Yet shall it appeare (if the thinge be brought still +further to the teste, and, from an Imagination or Dreame, become an +actual Realitie), that he will shrinke from and decline that which he +did erste so ardently sigh for and covet. And the reason of this is as +follows, to-wit: That Habit or Custome hath brought him more to love +and affect those very ways and conditions of life, yea, those +inconveniences and deficiencies which he useth to deplore and abhorre, +than that Crown of Golde or Jewel of Happiness whose withholding he +hath all his life lamented. Hence we may learne, that what is past, is +dead, and that though thoughts be free, nature is ever captive, and +loveth her chaine." + +This is too lugubrious and cynical not to have some truth in it; but I +am unwilling to believe that more than half of it is true. The author +himself was evidently an old man, and therefore a prejudiced judge; and +he did not make allowances for the range and variety of temperament. +Age is not a matter of years, and scarcely of experience. The only +really old persons are the selfish ones. The man whose thoughts, +actions, and affections center upon himself, soon acquires a fixity and +crustiness which (if to be old is to be "strange to youth") is old as +nothing else is. But the man who makes the welfare and happiness of +others his happiness, is as young at threescore as he was at twenty, +and perhaps even younger, for he has had no time to grow old. + +_April 30th_.--The Courtneys are in town! This is, I believe, her +first visit to America since he married her. At all events, I have not +seen or heard of her in all these seven years. I wonder ... I was going +to write, I wonder whether she remembers me. Of course she remembers +me, in a sort of way. I am tied up somewhere among her bundle of +recollections, and occasionally, in an idle moment, her eye falls upon +me, and moves her, perhaps, to smile or to sigh. For my own part, in +thinking over our old days, I find I forget her less than I had +supposed. Probably she has been more or less consciously in my mind +throughout. In the same way, one has always latent within him the +knowledge that he must die; but it does not follow that he is +continually musing on the thought of death. As with death, so with this +old love of mine. What a difference, if we had married! She was a very +lovely girl--at least, I thought so then. Very likely I should not +think her so now. My taste and knowledge have developed; a different +order of things interests me. It may not be an altogether pleasant +thing to confess; but, knowing myself as I now do, I have often thanked +my stars that I am a bachelor. + +Doubtless she is even more changed than I am. A woman changes more than +a man in seven years, and a married woman especially must change a +great deal from twenty-two to twenty-nine. Think of Ethel Leigh being +in her thirtieth year! and the mother of four or five children, +perhaps. Well, for the matter of that, think of the romantic and +ambitious young Claude Campbell being an old bachelor of forty! I have +married Art instead of Ethel, and she, instead of being Mrs. Campbell, +is Mrs. Courtney. + +It was a surprising thing--her marrying him so suddenly. But, +appearances to the contrary notwithstanding, I have never quite made up +my mind that Ethel was really fickle. She did it out of pique, or +pride, or impulse, or whatever it is that sways women in such cases. +She was angry, or indignant--how like fire and ice at once she was when +she was angry!--and she was resolved to show me that she could do +without me. She would not listen to my explanations; and I was always +awkward and stiff about making explanations. Besides, it was not an +easy matter to explain, especially to a girl like her. With a married +woman or a widow it would have been a simple thing enough. But Ethel +Leigh, the minister's daughter--innocent, ignorant, passionate--she would +tolerate nothing short of a public disavowal and discontinuance of my +relations with Mrs. Murray, and that, of course, I could not consent to, +though heaven knows (and so must Ethel, by this time) that Mrs. Murray was +nothing to me save as she was the wife of my friend, during whose +enforced absence I was bound to look after her, to some extent. It was +not my fault that poor Mrs. Murray was a fool. But such are the +trumpery seeds from which tragedies grow. Not that ours was a tragedy, +exactly: Ethel married her English admirer, and I became a somewhat +distinguished artist, that is all. I wonder whether she has been happy! +Likely enough; she was born to be wealthy; Englishmen make good +husbands sometimes, and her London life must have been a brilliant +one.... I have been looking at my old photograph of her--the one she +gave me the morning after we were engaged. Tall, slender, dark, with +level brows, and the bearing of a Diana. She certainly was handsome, +and I shall not run the risk of spoiling this fine memory by calling on +her. Even if she have not deteriorated, she can scarcely have improved. +Nay, even were she the same now as then, I should not find her so, +because of the change in myself. Why should I blink the truth? +Experience, culture, and the sober second thought of middle age have +carried me far beyond the point where I could any longer be in sympathy +with this crude, thin-skinned, impulsive girl. And then--four or five +children! Decidedly, I will give her a wide berth. And Courtney +himself, with his big beard, small brain, and obtrusive laugh! I shall +step across to California for a few months. + +_May 1st_.--Called this morning on Ethel Leigh--Mrs. Deighton +Courtney, that is to say. She is not so much changed, but she has +certainly improved. When I say she has not changed much, I refer to her +physical appearance. Her features are scarcely altered; her figure is a +little fuller and more compact; in her bearing there is a certain quiet +composure and self-possession--the air of a woman who has seen the +world, has received admiration, and is familiar with the graceful +little arts of social intercourse. In short, she has acquired a high +external polish; and that is precisely what she most needed. Evidently, +too, there is an increased mental refinement corresponding to the +outward manner. She has mellowed, sweetened--whether deepened or not I +should hesitate to affirm. But I am quite sure that I find her more +charming to talk with, more supple in intercourse, more fascinating, in +a word, than formerly. We chatted discursively and rather volubly for +more than an hour; yet we did not touch on anything very serious or +profound. They are staying at the Brevoort House. Courtney himself, by- +the-by, is still in Boston (they landed there), where business will +detain him a few days. Ethel goes on a house-hunting expedition to- +morrow, and I am going with her; for New York has altered out of her +recollection during these seven years. They are to remain here three +years, perhaps longer. Courtney is to establish and oversee an American +branch of his English business. + +They have only one child--a pretty little thing: Susie and I became +great friends. + +Mrs. Courtney opened the door of the private sitting-room in which I +was awaiting her, and came in--beautifully! She has learned how to do +that since I knew her. My own long residence in Paris has made me more +critical than I used to be in such matters; but I do not remember +having met any woman in society with manners more nearly perfect than +Mrs. Courtney's. Ethel Leigh used to be, upon occasion, painfully +abrupt and disconcerting; and her movements and attitudes, though there +was abundant native grace in them, were often careless and +unconventional. Of course, I do not forget that niceties of deportment, +without sound qualities of mind and heart to back them, are of trifling +value; but the two kinds of attraction are by no means incompatible +with each other. Mrs. Courtney smiles often. Ethel Leigh used to smile +rarely, although, when the smile did come, it was irresistibly winning; +there was in it exquisite significance and tenderness. It is a +beautiful smile still, but that charm of rarity (if it be a charm) is +lacking. It is a conventional smile more than a spontaneous or a happy +one; indeed, it led me to surmise that she had perhaps not been very +happy since we last met, and had learned to use this smile as a sort of +veil. Not that I suppose for a moment that Courtney has ill-treated +her. I never could see anything in the man beyond a superficial +comeliness, a talent for business, and an affable temper; but ho was +not in any sense a bad fellow. Besides, he was over head and ears in +love with her; and Ethel would be sure to have the upper hand of a +nature like his. No, her unhappiness, if she be unhappy, would be due +to no such cause, she and her husband are no doubt on good terms with +each other. But--suppose she has discovered that he fell short of what +she demanded in a husband; that she overmatched him; that, in order to +make their life smooth, she must descend to him? I imagine it may be +something of that kind. Poor Mrs. Courtney! + +She addressed me as "Mr. Campbell," and I dare say she was right. Women +best know how to meet these situations. To have called me "Claude" +would have placed us in a false position, by ignoring the changes that +have taken place. It is wise to respect these barriers; they are +conventional, but, rightly considered, they are more of an assistance +than of an obstacle to freedom of intercourse. I asked her how she +liked England. She smiled and said, "It was my business to like +England; still, I am glad to see America once more." + +"You will entertain a great deal, I presume--that sort of thing?" + +"We shall hope to make friends with people--and to meet old friends. +It is such a pleasant surprise to find you here. I heard you were +settled in Paris." + +"So I was, for several years; the Parisians said nice things about my +pictures. But one may weary even of Paris. I returned here two years +ago, and am now as much of a fixture in New York as if I'd never left +it." + +"But not a permanent fixture. Shall we never see you in London?" + +"My present probabilities lie rather in the direction of California. I +want to make some studies of the scenery and the atmosphere. Besides, I +am getting too old to think of another European residence." + +"No one gets old after thirty--especially no bachelor!" she answered, +with a smile. "But if you were ever to feel old, the society of London +would rejuvenate you." + +"It has certainly done you no harm. But you have the happiness to be +married." + +She looked at me pleasantly and said, "Yes, I make a good +Englishwoman." That sounded like an evasion, but the expression of her +face was not evasive. In the old days she would probably have flushed +up and said something cutting. + +"You must see my little girl," she said, after a while. + +The child was called, and presently came in. She resembles her mother, +and has a vivacity scarcely characteristic of English children. I am +not constitutionally a worshiper of children, but I liked Susie. She +put her arms round her mother's arm, and gazed at me with wide-eyed +scrutiny." + +"This is Mr. Campbell," said mamma. + +"My name is Susan Courtney," said the little thing. "We are going to +stay in New York three years. Hot here--this is only an hotel--we are +going to have a house. How do you do? This is my dolly." + +I saluted dolly, and thereby inspired its parent with confidence: she +put her hand in mine, and gave me her smooth little cheek to kiss. "You +are not like papa," she then observed. + +I smiled conciliatingly, being uncertain whether it were prudent to +follow this lead; but Mrs. Courtney asked, "In what way different, +dear?" + +"Papa has a beard," replied Susie. + +The incident rather struck me; it seemed to indicate that Mrs. Courtney +was under no apprehension that the child would say anything +embarrassing about the father. Having learned so much, I ventured +farther. + +"Do you love papa or mamma best?" I inquired. + +"I am with mamma most," she answered, after meditation, "but when papa +comes, I like him." + +This was non-committal. She continued, "Papa is coming here day after +to-morrow. To-morrow, mamma and I are going to find a house." + +"Your husband leaves all that to you?" I said, turning to Mrs. +Courtney. + +"Mr. Courtney never knows or cares what sort of a place he lives in. It +took me some little time to get used to that. I wanted everything to be +just in a certain way. They used to laugh at me, and say I was more +English than he." + +"Now that you are both here, you must both be American." + +"He doesn't enjoy America much. Of course, it is very different from +London. An Englishman can not be expected to care for American ways and +American quickness, and--" + +"American people?" I put in, laughingly. + +"Don't undress dolly here," she said to Susie. "It isn't time yet to +put her to bed, and she might catch cold." + +Was this another evasion? The serene face betrayed nothing, but she +had left unanswered the question that aimed at discovering how she and +her husband stood toward each other. After all, however, no answer +could have told me more than her no answer did--supposing it to have +been intentional. I soon afterward took my leave, after having arranged +to call to-morrow and accompany her and Susie on their house-hunting +expedition. Upon the whole, I don't think I am sorry to have renewed my +acquaintance with her. She is more delightful--as an acquaintance--than +when I knew her formerly. Should I have fallen in love with her had I +met her for the first time as she is now? Yes, and no! In the old days +there was something about her that commanded me--that fascinated my +youthful imagination. Perhaps it was only the freshness, the ignorance, +the timidity of young maidenhood--that mystery of possibilities of a +nature that has not yet met the world and received its impress for good +or evil. It is this which captivates in youth; and this, of course, +Mrs. Courtney has lost. But every quality that might captivate mature +manhood is hers, and, were I likely to think of marriage now, and were +she marriageable, she is the type of woman I would choose. Yet I do not +quite relish the perception that my present feminine ideal (whether it +be lower or higher) is not the former one. But,--frankly, would I marry +her if I could? I hardly know: I have got out of the habit of regarding +marriage as among my possibilities; many avenues of happiness that once +were open to me are now closed against me. Put it, that I have lost a +faculty--that I am now able to enjoy only in imagination a phase of +existence that, formerly, I could have enjoyed in fact. This bit of +self-analysis may be erroneous; but I would not like to run the risk of +proving it so! Am I not well enough off as I am? My health is fair, my +mind active, my reputation secure, my finances prosperous. The things +that I can dream must surely be better than anything that could happen. +I can picture, for example, a state of matrimonial felicity which no +marriage of mine could realize. Besides, I can, whenever I choose, see +Mrs. Courtney herself, talk with her, and enjoy her as a reasonable and +congenial friend, apart from the danger and disappointment that might +result from a closer connection. I think I have chosen the wiser part, +or, rather, the wiser part has been thrust upon me. That I shall never +be wildly happy is, at least, security that I shall never be profoundly +miserable. I shall simply be comfortable. Is this sour grapes? Am I, if not +counting, then discounting my eggs before they are hatched? To such +questions a practical--a materialized--answer would be the only +conclusive one. Were Mrs. Courtney ready to drop into my mouth, I +should either open my mouth, or else I should shut it, and either act +would be conclusive. But, so far from being ready to drop into my mouth, +she is immovably and (to all appearances) contentedly fixed where she +is. I suppose I am insinuating that appearances are deceptive; that she +may be unhappy with her husband, and desire to leave him. Well, there +is no technical evidence in support of such an hypothesis; but, again, in +a matter of this kind, it is not so much the technical as the indirect +evidence that tells--the cadences of the voice, the breathing, the +silences, the atmosphere. There is no denying that I did somehow +acquire a vague impression that Courtney is not so large a figure in his +wife's eyes as he might be. I may have been biased by my previous +conception of his character, or I may have misinterpreted the impalpable, +indescribable signs that I remarked in her. But, once more, how do I +know that her not caring for him would postulate her caring for me? Why +should she care for either of us? Our old romance is to her as the memory +of something read in a book, and it is powerless to make her heart beat +one throb the faster. Were Courtney to die to-morrow, would his widow +expect me to marry her? Not she! She would settle down here quietly, +educate her daughter, and think better of her departed husband with +every year that passed, and less of repeating the experiment that made +her his! I may be prone to romantic and elaborate speculations, but I am +not exactly a fool. I do not delude myself with the idea that Mrs. Courtney +is, at this moment, following my example by recording her impressions of +me at her own writing-desk, and asking herself whether--if such and +such a thing were to happen--such another would be apt to follow. +No; she has put Susie to bed, and is by this time asleep herself, after +having read through the "Post," or "Bazar," or the last new novel, as +her predilection may be. It is after midnight; since she has not followed +my example, I will follow hers; it is much the more sensible of the two. + +_May 2d_.--What a woman she is! and, in a different sense, what a +man I am! How little does a man know or suspect himself until he is +brought to the proof! How serenely and securely I philosophized and +laid down the law yesterday! and to-day, how strange to contrast the +event with my prognostication of it! And yet, again, how little has +happened that might not be told in such a way as to appear nothing! It +was the latent meaning, the spirit, the touch of look and tone. Her +husband may have reached New York by this time; they may be together at +this moment; he will find no perceptible change in her--perceptible to +him! He will be told that I have been her escort during the day, and +that I was polite and serviceable, and that a house has been selected. +What more is there to tell? Nothing--that he could hear or understand! +and yet--everything! He will say, "Yes, I recollect Campbell; nice +fellow; have him to dine with us one of these days." But I shall never +sit at their table; I shall never see her again; I can not! I shall +start for California next week. Meanwhile I will write down the history +of one day, for it is well to have these things set visibly before one +--to grasp the nettle, as it were. Nothing is so formidable as it +appears when we shrink from defining it to ourselves. + +I drove to the hotel in my brougham at eleven o'clock, as we had +previously arranged. She was ready and waiting for me, and little Susie +was with her. Ethel was charmingly dressed, and there was a soft look +in her eyes as she turned them on me--a look that seemed to say, "I +remember the past; it is pleasant to see you, so pleasant as to be +sad!" Susie came to me as if I were an old friend, and I lifted the +child from the floor and kissed her twice. + +"Why did you give me two kisses?" she demanded, as I put her down. +"Papa always gives me only one kiss." + +"Papa has mamma as well as you to kiss; but I have no one; I am an old +bachelor." + +"When you have known mamma longer, will you kiss her too?" + +"Old bachelors kiss nobody but little girls," I replied, laughing. + +"We went down to the brougham, and after we were seated and on our +way," Ethel said, "Already I feel so much at home in New York, it almost +startles me. I fancied I should have forgotten old associations--should +have grown out of sympathy with them; but I seem only to have learned +to appreciate them more. Our memory for some things is better than we +would believe." + +"There are two memories in us," I remarked; "the memory of the heart +and the memory of the head. The former never is lost, though the other +may be. But I had not supposed that you cared very deeply for the +American period of your life." + +"England is very agreeable," she said, rather hastily. She turned her +head and looked out of the window; but after a pause she added, as if +to herself, "but I am an American!" + +"There is, no doubt, a deep-rooted and substantial repose in English +life such as is scarcely to be found elsewhere," I said; "but, for all +that, I have often thought that the best part of domestic happiness +could exist nowhere but here. Here a man may marry the woman he loves, +and their affection for each other will be made stronger by the +hardships they may have to pass through. After all, when we come to the +end of our lives, it is not the business we have done, nor the social +distinction we have enjoyed--it is the love we have given and received +that we are glad of." + +"Mamma," inquired Susie, "does Mr. Campbell love you?" + +We both of us looked at the child and laughed a little. "Mr. Campbell +is an old friend," said Ethel. After a few moments she blushed. She +held in her hand some house-agents' orders to view houses, and these +she now began to examine. "Is this Madison Avenue place likely to be a +good one?" she asked me. + +"It is conveniently situated and comfortable; but I should think it +might be too large for a family of three. Perhaps, though, you don't +like a close fit?" + +"I don't like empty rooms, though I prefer such rooms as there are to +be large. But it doesn't make much difference. Mr. Courtney moves about +a good deal, and he is as happy in a hotel as anywhere. These American +hotels are luxurious and splendid, but they are not home-like to me." + +"I remember you used to dislike being among a crowd of people you +didn't know." + +"Yes, and I haven't yet learned to be sociable in that way. A friend is +more company for me than a score of acquaintances. Dear me! I'm afraid +New York will spoil me--for England!" + +"Perhaps Mr. Courtney may be cured of England by New York." + +She smiled and said, "Perhaps! He accommodates himself to things more +easily than I do, but I think one needs to be born in America to know +how to love it." + +Under the veil of discussing America and things in general, we were +talking of ourselves, awakening reminiscences of the past, and +discovering, with a pleasure we did not venture to acknowledge, that-- +allowing for the events and the years that had come between--we were as +much in accord as when we were young lovers. Yes, as much, and perhaps +even more. For surely, if one grows in the right way, the sphere of +knowledge and sympathy must enlarge, and thereby the various points of +contact between two minds and hearts must be multiplied. Ethel and I, +during these seven years, had traveled our round of daily life on +different sides of the earth; but the miles of sea and land which had +physically separated us had been powerless to estrange our spirits. +Nothing is more strange, in this mysterious complexity of impressions +and events that we call human existence, than the fact that two beings, +entirely cut off from all natural means of association and communion, +may yet, unknown to each other, be breathing the same spiritual air and +learning the same moral and intellectual lessons. Like two seeds of the +same species, planted, the one in American soil, the other in English, +Ethel and I had selected, by some instinct of the soul, the same +elements from our different surroundings; so that now, when we met once +more, we found a close and harmonious resemblance between the leaves +and blossoms of our experience. What can be more touching and +delightful than such a discovery? Or what more sad than to know that it +came too late for us to profit by it? + +Oh, Ethel, how easy it is to take the little step that separates light +from darkness, happiness from misery! Remembering that we live but +once, and that the worthy enjoyments of life are so limited in number +and so hard to get, it seems unjust and monstrous that one little hour +of jealousy or misunderstanding should wreck the fair prospects of +months and years. Why is mischief so much readier to our hand than +good? + +We got out at a house near the Park. I assisted Ethel to alight, and, +as her hand rested on mine, the thought crossed my mind--How sweet if +this were our own home that we are about to enter!--and I glanced at +her face to see whether a like thought had visited her. She maintained +a subdued demeanor, with an expression about the mouth and eyes of a +peculiar timid gentleness, and, as it were, a sort of mental leaning +upon me for support and protection. She felt, it may be, a little fear +of herself, at finding herself--in more senses than one--so near to me; +and, woman-like, she depended upon me to protect her against the very +peril of which I was the occasion. No higher or more delicate +compliment can be paid by a woman to a man; and I resolved that I would +do what in me lay to deserve it. But such resolutions are the hardest +in the world to keep, because the circumstance or the impulse of the +moment is continually in wait to betray you. Ethel was more fascinating +and lovely in this mood than in any other I had hitherto seen her in; +and the misgiving, from which I could not free myself, that the man +whom Fate had made her husband did not appreciate or properly cherish +the gift bestowed upon him, made me warm toward her more than ever. I +could scarcely have believed that such blood could flow in the sober +veins of my middle age; but love knows nothing of time or age! + +"I do not like this house," Susie declared, when we had been admitted +by the care-taker. "It has no carpets, nor chairs, nor pictures; and +the floor is dirty; and the walls are not pretty!" + +"I suppose one can have these houses decorated and furnished at short +notice?" Ethel asked me. + +"It would not take long. There are several firms that make it their +specialty." + +"I have always wanted to live in a house where the colors and forms +were to my taste. I don't know whether you remember that you used to +think I had some taste in such matters. Mr. Courtney, of course, +doesn't care much about art, and he didn't encourage me to carry out my +ideas. A business man can not be an artist, you know." + +"You yourself would have become an artist if--" I began; but I was +approaching dangerous ground, and I stopped. "This dining-room might be +done in Indian red," I remarked--"the woodwork, that is to say. The +walls would be a warm salmon color, which contrasts well with the cold +blue of the china, which it is the fashion to have about nowadays. As +for the furniture, antique dark oak is as safe as anything, don't you +think so?" + +"I should like all that," said she, moving a little nearer me, and +letting her eyes wander about the room with a pleased expression, until +at length they met my own. "If you could only design our decoration for +us, I'm sure it would be perfect; at least, I should be satisfied. +Well, and how should we... how ought the drawing-room to be done?" + +"There is a shade of yellow that is very agreeable for drawing-rooms, +and it goes very well with the dull peacock-blue which is in vogue now. +Then you could get one of those bloomy Morris friezes. There is some +very graceful Chippendale to be picked up in various places. And no +such good furniture is made nowadays. But I am advising you too much +from the artist's point of view." + +"Oh, I can get other sort of advice when I want it." She looked at me +with a smile; our glances met more often now than at first. "But it +seems to me," she went on, "that the way the house is built docs not +suit the way we want to decorate it. Let us look at a smaller one. I +should think ten rooms would be quite enough. And it would be nice to +have a corner house, would it not?" + +"If the question were only of our agreement, there would probably not +be much difficulty," I said, in a tone which I tried to make merely +courteous, but which may have revealed something more than courtesy +beneath it. + +In coming down-stairs she gathered her dress in her right hand and put +her left in my arm; and then, in a flash, the picture came before me of +the last time we had gone arm-in-arm together down-stairs. It was at +her father's house, and she was speaking to me of that unlucky Mrs. +Murray; we had our quarrel that evening in the drawing-room, and it was +never made up. From then till now, what a gulf! and yet those years +would have been but a bridge to pass over, save for the one barrier +that was insurmountable between us. + +"What has become of that Mrs. Murray whom you used to know?" she asked, +as we reached the foot of the stairs. She relinquished my arm as she +spoke, and faced me. + +I felt the blood come to my face. "Mrs. Murray was in my thoughts at +the same moment--and perhaps by the same train of associations." I +answered, "I don't know where she is now; I lost sight of her years +ago--soon after you were married, in fact. Why do you ask?" + +"You had not forgotten her, then?" + +"I had every reason to forget her, except the one reason for which I +have remembered her--and you know what that is! Have you mistrusted me +all this time?" + +"Oh, no--no! I don't think I really mistrusted you at all; and long ago +I admitted to myself that you had acted unselfishly and honorably. But +I was angry at the time; you know, sometimes a girl will be angry, even +when there is no good reason for it. I have long wished for an +opportunity to tell you this, for my own sake, you know, as well as for +yours." + +"I hardly know whether I am most glad or sorry to hear this," I said, +as we moved toward the door. "If you had only been able to say it, or +to think it, before ... there would have been a great difference!" + +"The worst of mistakes is, they are so seldom set right at the time, or +in the way they ought to be. Come, Susie, we are going away now. Susie, +do you most like to be American or English?" + +"English," replied Susie, without hesitation. + +Her mother turned to me and said in a low tone: + +"I love her, whichever she is." + +I understood what she meant. Susie was the symbol of that inevitable +element in our lives which seems to evolve itself without reference to +our desires or efforts; but which, nevertheless, when we have +recognized that it is inevitable, we learn (if we are wise) to accept +and even to love. Save for the estrangement between Ethel and myself, +Susie would never have existed; yet there she was, a beautiful child, +who had as good a right to be as either of us; and her mother loved +her, and, as it were, bade me love her also. I took the little maiden +by the hand and said, "You are right, Susie; the Americans are the +children of the English, and can not expect to be so wise and +comfortable as they. But you must remember that the Americans have a +future before them, and we are not enemies any more. Will you be +friends with me, and let me call you my little girl?" + +"I shouldn't mind being your little girl, if I could still have the +same mamma," was Susie's reply. "Papa is away a great deal, and you +could be papa, you know, until he came back." + +I made some laughing answer; but, in fact, Susie's frank analysis of +the situation poignantly kindled an imagination which stood in no need +of stimulus. Ah, if this were the Golden Age, when love never went +astray, how happy we might be! But it is not the Golden Age--far from +it! Meanwhile, I think I can assert, with a clear conscience, that no +dishonorable purpose possessed me. I loved Ethel too profoundly to wish +to do her wrong. Yet I may have wished--I did wish--that a kindly +Providence might have seen fit to remove the disabilities that +controlled us. If a wish could have removed Courtney painlessly to +another world, I think I should have wished it. There was something +exquisitely touching in Ethel's appearance and manner. She is as pure +as any woman that ever lived; but she is a woman! and I felt that, for +this day, I had a man's power over her. Occasionally I was conscious +that her eyes were resting on my face; when I addressed her, her aspect +softened and brightened; she fell into little moods of preoccupation +from which she would emerge with a sigh; in many ways she betrayed, +without knowing it, the secret that neither of us would mention. I do +not mean to imply that she expected me to mention it. A pure woman does +not realize the dangers of the world; and that very fact is itself her +strongest security against them. But, had I spoken, she would have +responded. It was a temptation which I could hardly have believed I +could have resisted as I did; but such a woman calls out all that is +best and noblest in a man; and, at the time, I was better than I am! + +When we were in the brougham again, I said, "If you will allow me, I +will drive you to a house I have seen, which belongs to a man with whom +I am slightly acquainted. He is on the point of leaving it, but his +furniture is still in it, and, as he is himself an artist and a man of +taste, it will be worth your while to look at it. He is rather deaf, +but that is all the better; we can express our opinions without +disturbing him. Perhaps you might arrange to take house and furniture +as they stand." + +"Whatever you advise, I shall like to do," Ethel answered. + +We presently arrived at the house, which was situated in the upper part +of the town, a little to the west of Fifth Avenue. It was a comely +gabled edifice of red brick, with square bay-windows and a roomy porch. +The occupant, Maler, a German, happened to be at home; and on my +sending in my card, we were admitted at once, and he came to greet us +in the hall in his usual hearty, headlong fashion. + +"My good Campbell," he exclaimed, in his blundering English, "very +delighted to see you. Ah, dis will be madame, and de little maid! So +you are married since some time--I have not know it! Your servant, +Madame Campbell. I know--all de artists know--your husband: we wish we +could paint how he can--but it is impossible! Ha, ha, ha! not so! Now, +I am very pleased you shall see dis house. May I beg de honor of +accompany you? First you shall see de studio; dat I call de stomach of +de house, eh? because it is most important of all de places, and make +de rest of de places live. See, I make dat window be put in--you find +no better light in New York. Den you see, here we have de alcove, where +Madame Campbell shall sit and make her sewing, while de husband do his +work on de easel. How you like dat portiere? I design him myself--oh, +yes, I do all here; you keep them if you like; I go to Germany, perhaps +not come back after some years, so I leave dem, not so? Now I show you +my little chamber of the piano. See, I make an arched ceiling--groined +arch, eh?--and I gild him; so I get pretty light and pretty sound, +not? Ah! madame, I have not de happiness to be married, but I make my +house so, dat if I get me a wife, she find all ready; but no wife come, +so I give him over to Herr Campbell and you. Now we mount up-stairs to +de bed-rooms, eh?" + +In this way he went over the entire house with us. His loud, jolly +voice, his resounding laugh, his bustling manner, his heedless, boy- +like self-confidence, and his deafness, made it impossible to get in a +word of explanation, and, after a few efforts, I gave up the attempt. + +"Let him suppose what he likes," I said aside to Ethel, "it can make no +difference; he is going away, and you will never see him again. After +all these years, it can do no great harm for us to play at being Mr. +and Mrs. Campbell for an hour!" + +"It is a very beautiful house," she said, tacitly accepting what I had +proposed. "It is such a house as I have always dreamed of living in. I +shall not care to look at any others. Will you tell him that we--that I +will take it just as it stands. You have made this a very pleasant day +for me--a very happy day," she added, in a lower tone. "Every room here +will be associated with you. You will come here often and see me, will +you not? Perhaps, after all, you might use the studio to paint my--or +Susie's portrait in." + +"I shall inflict myself upon you very often, I have no doubt," was all +I ventured to reply. I could not tell her, at that moment, that we must +never see each other again. She--after the manner of women--probably +supposes that a man's strength is limitless; that he may do with +himself and make of himself what he chooses; and she supposes that I +could visit her and converse with her day after day, and yet keep my +thoughts and my acts within such bounds as would enable me to take +Courtney honestly by the hand. But I know too well my own weakness, and +I shall leave her while yet I have power to do so. Tomorrow--or soon--I +will write to her one last letter, telling her why I go. + +Sudden and strange indeed has been this passionate episode in a life +which, methought, had done with passion. It has lasted hardly so many +hours as I have lived years; and yet, were I to live on into the next +century, it would never cease to influence me in all I think and do. I +can not solve to my satisfaction this problem--why two lives should be +wasted as ours have been. Courtney could have been happy with another +wife, or with no wife at all, perhaps; but, for Ethel and me, there +could be no happiness save in each other. But were she free to-day, the +separation that has already existed--long though it has been--would +only serve to render our future union more blissful and complete. We +have learned, by sad experience, the value of a love like ours, and we +should know how to give it its fullest and widest expression. But oh! +what a blank and chilly road lies before us now! + +I drove her back to her hotel; we hardly spoke all the way; my heart +was too full, and hers also, I think; though she did not know, as I +did, that it was our last interview. It must be our last! Heaven help +me to keep that resolution! + +Susie was not at all impressed by the pathos of the situation; she +babbled all the time, and thus, at all events, afforded us an excuse +for our silence. At parting, one incident occurred that may as well be +recorded. I had shaken hands with Ethel, speaking a few words of +farewell, and allowing her to infer that we might meet again on the +morrow; then I turned to Susie, and gave her the kiss which I would +have given the world to have had the right to press on her mother's +lips. Ethel saw, and, I think, understood. She stooped quickly down, +and laid her mouth where mine had been. Through the innocent medium of +the child, our hearts met; and then I saw her no more. + +_May 3d_.--Of course, it may not be true, probably it is not; +mistakes are so easily made in the first moments of such horror and +confusion; the dead come to life, and the living die. Or, at the worst, +he may be only wounded or disabled. At all events, I decline to +believe, save upon certain evidence, that the poor fellow has actually +been killed. Were it to turn out so, I should feel almost like a +murderer; for was not I writing, in this very journal, and perhaps at +the very moment the accident occurred, that if my wish could send him +to another world, I would not spare him? + +_Later_.--I have read all the accounts in the newspapers this +morning, and all agree in putting Courtney's name among the killed. +There can be no doubt about it any longer; he is dead. When the +collision occurred, the car in which he vas riding was thrown across +the track, and the other train crashed through it. Judging by the +condition of the body when discovered, death must have been nearly +instantaneous. Poor Courtney! My conscience is not at ease. Of course, +I am not really responsible; that is only imagination. But I begin to +suspect that my imagination has been playing me more than one trick +lately. + +And now, with this new state of affairs so suddenly and terribly +brought about, what is to be done? I am as yet scarcely in a condition +to reflect calmly; but a voice within me seems to say that something +else besides my conscience has been awakened by Courtney's death. Can +it be that imagination, dallying with what it took for impossibilities, +could so far mislead a man? Well, I shall start at once for the scene +of the disaster, and relieve the poor fellow's widow of whatever pain I +can. Ethel Courtney a widow! Ah, Ethel! Death sheds a ghastly light +upon the idle vagaries of the human heart. + +_May 15th_.--_Denver_, _Colorado_.--Magnificent weather +and scenery; very different from my own mental scenery and mood at this +moment. I am sorely out of spirits; and no wonder, after the reckless +and insane emotion of the first days of this month. One pays for such +indulgences at my age. + +I have been re-reading the foregoing pages of this journal. Was I a +fool or a coward, or was I merely intoxicated for eight-and-forty +hours? At all events, Courtney's tragic end sobered me, and put what I +had been doing in a true light. I am glad my insanity was not permitted +to proceed farther than it did; but I have quite enough to reproach +myself with as it is. So far as I hare been able to explain the matter +to myself, my prime error lay in attributing, in a world subject to +constant change, too much permanence to a given state of affairs. The +fact that Ethel was the wife of another man seemed to me so fixed and +unalterable that I allowed my imagination to play with the picture of +what might happen if that unalterable fact were altered. Secure in this +fallacy, I worked myself up to the pitch of believing that I was +actually and passionately in love with a woman whose inaccessibility +was, after all, her most winning attraction. Moreover, by writing down, +in this journal, the events and words of the hours we spent together, I +confirmed myself in my false persuasion, and probably imported into the +record of what we said and did an amount of color and hidden +significance that never, as I am now convinced, belonged to it in +reality. Deluded by the notion that I was playing with a fancy, I was +suddenly aroused to find myself imbrued in facts. The whole episode has +profoundly humiliated me, and degraded me in my own esteem. + +But I am not at the bottom of the mystery yet. Was I not in love with +Ethel? Surely I was, if love be anything. Then why did I not ask her to +marry me? Would she have refused me? No. That last look she gave me +from under her black veil, when I told her I was going away.... Ah, no, +she would not have refused me. Then why did I hesitate? Was not such a +marriage precisely what I have always longed for? During all these +seven years have I not been bewailing my bachelorhood, and wishing for +an Ethel to cheer my solitary fireside with her gracious presence, to +be interested in my work and hopes, to interest me in her wifely and +maternal ways and aspirations? And when at last all these things were +offered me, why did I shrink back and reject them? + +Honestly, I can not explain it. Perhaps, if I had never loved her +before, I might have loved her this time enough to unite my fate with +hers. Or, perhaps--for I may as well speak plainly, since I am speaking +to myself--perhaps, by force of habit, I had grown to love, better than +love itself, those self-same forlorn conditions and dreary solitudes +which I was continually lamenting and praying to be delivered from. +What a dismal solution of the problem this would be were it the true +one! It amounts to saying that I prefer an empty room, a silent hearth, +an old pair of slippers, and a dressing-gown to the love and +companionship of a refined and beautiful woman!--that I love even my +own discomforts more than the comfort she would give me! It sounds +absurd, scandalous, impossible; and yet, if it be not the literal +truth, I know not what the truth is. It is amazing that an educated and +intelligent man can live to be forty years old and still have come to +no better an understanding of himself than I had. Verily, as my old +author said, thought is free, but nature is captive, and loveth her +chain. Yes, my old author was right. + + + + +MY FRIEND PATON. + + +Mathew Morriss, my father, was a cotton merchant in Liverpool twenty- +five years ago--a steady, laborious, clear-headed man, very +affectionate and genial in his private intercourse. He was wealthy, and +we lived in a sumptuous house in the upper part of the city. This was +when I was about ten years old. My father was twice married; I was the +child of the first wife, who died when I was very young; my stepmother +came five years later. She was the elder of two sisters, both beautiful +women. The sister often came to visit us. I remember I liked her better +than I liked my stepmother; in fact, I regarded her with that sort of +romantic attachment that often is developed in lads of my age. She had +golden brown hair and a remarkably sweet voice, and she sang and played +in a manner that transported me with delight; for I was already devoted +to music. She was of a gentle yet impulsive temperament, easily moved +to smiles and tears; she seemed to me the perfection of womankind, and +I made no secret of my determination to marry her when I grew up. She +used to caress me, and look at me in a dreamy way, and tell me I was +the nicest and handsomest boy in the world. "And as soon as you are a +year older than I am, John," she would say, "you shall marry me, if you +like." + +Another frequent visitor at our house at this time was not nearly so +much a favorite of mine. This was a German, Adolf Koerner by name, who +had been a clerk in my father's concern for a number of years, and had +just been admitted junior partner. My father placed every confidence in +him, and often declared that he had the best idea of business he had +ever met with. This may very likely have been the fact; but to me he +appeared simply a tall, grave, taciturn man, of cold manners, speaking +with a slight German accent, which I disliked. I suppose he was about +thirty-seven years of age, but I always thought of him as older than my +father, who was fifty. Another and more valid reason for my disliking +Koerner was that he was in the habit of paying a great deal of attention +to my ladylove, Miss Juliet Tretherne. I used to upbraid Juliet about +encouraging his advances, and I expressed my opinion of him in the +plainest language, at which she would smile in a preoccupied wav, and +would sometimes draw me to her and kiss me on the forehead. Once she +said, "Mr. Koerner is a very noble gentleman; you must not dislike him." +This had the effect of making me hate him all the more. + +One day I noticed an unusual commotion in the house, and Juliet came +down-stairs attired in a lovely white dress, with a long veil, and +fragrant flowers in her hair. She got into a carriage with my father +and stepmother, and drove away. I did not understand what it meant, and +no one told me. After they were gone I went into the drawing-room, and, +greatly to my surprise, saw there a long table covered with a white +cloth and laid out with a profusion of good things to eat and drink in +sparkling dishes and decanters. In the middle of the table was a great +cake covered with white frosting; the butler was arranging some flowers +round it. + +"What is that cake for, Curtis?" I asked. + +"For the bride, to be sure," said Curtis, without looking up. + +"The bride! who is she?" I demanded in astonishment. + +"Your aunt Juliet, to be sure!" said Curtis, composedly, stepping back +and contemplating his floral arrangement with his head on one side. + +I asked no more, but betook myself with all speed to my room, locked +the door, flung myself on the bed, and cried to heartbreaking with +grief, indignation, and mortification. After a very long time some one +tried the door, and a voice--the voice of Juliet--called to me. I made +no answer. She began to plead with me; I resisted as long as I could, +but finally my affection got the better of my resentment, and I arose +and opened the door, hiding my tear-stained face behind my arm. Juliet +caught me in her arms and kissed me; tears were running down her own +cheeks. How lovely she looked! My heart melted, and I was just on the +point of forgiving her when the voice of Koerner became audible from +below, calling out "Mrs. Koerner!" I tore myself away from her, and +cried passionately, "You don't love me! you love him! go to him!" She +looked at me for a moment with a pained expression; then she put her +hand in the pocket of her dress and drew out something done up in white +paper. "See what I have brought you, you unkind boy," said she. "What +is it?" I demanded. "A piece of my wedding-cake," she replied. "Give it +me!" said I. She put it in my hand; I ran forward to the head of the +stairs, which Koerner was just ascending, dashed the cake in his face, +and then rushed back to my own room, whence neither threats nor coaxing +availed to draw me forth for the rest of the day. + +I never saw Juliet again. She and her husband departed on their +wedding-trip that afternoon; it was to take them as far as Germany, for +Koerner said that he wished to visit his father and mother, who were +still alive, before settling down permanently in Liverpool. Whether +they really did so was never discovered. But, about a fortnight later, +a dreadful fact came to light. Koerner--the grave and reticent Koerner, +whom everybody trusted and thought so highly of--was a thief, and he +had gone off with more than half my father's property in his pocket. +The blow almost destroyed my father, and my stepmother, too, for that +matter, for at first it seemed as though Juliet must have been privy to +the crime. This, however, turned out not to have been the case. Her +fate must have been all the more terrible on that account; but no news +of either of them ever came back to us, and my father would never take +any measures to bring Koerner to justice. It was several months before +he recovered from the shock sufficiently to take up business again; and +then the American Civil War came and completed his ruin. He died, a +poor and broken-down man, a year later. My stepmother, who was really +an admirable woman, realized whatever property remained to us, took a +small house, and sent me to an excellent school, where I was educated +for Cambridge. Meanwhile I had been devoting all possible time to +music; for I had determined to become a composer, and I was looking +forward, after taking my degree, to completing my musical education +abroad; but my mother's health was precarious, and, when the time came, +she found herself unequal to making the journey, and the change of +habits and surroundings that it implied. We lived very quietly in +Liverpool for three or four years; then she died, and, after I had +settled our affairs, I found myself in possession of a small income and +alone in the world. Without loss of time I set out for the Continent. + +I went to a German city, where the best musical training was to be had, +and made my arrangements to pass several years there. At the banker's, +when I went to provide for the regular receipt of my remittances, I met +a young American, by name Paton Jeffries. He was from New England, and, +I think, a native of the State of Connecticut; his father, he told me, +was a distinguished inventor, who had made and lost a considerable +fortune in devising a means of promoting sleep by electricity. Paton +was studying to be an architect, which, he said, was the coming +profession in his country; and it was evident, on a short acquaintance, +that he was a fellow of unusual talents--one of those men of whom you +say that, come what may, they are always sure to fall on their feet. +For my part, I have certainly never met with so active and versatile a +spirit. He was a year or so older than I, rather tall than short, +lightly but strongly built, with a keen, smiling, subtle face, a +finely-developed forehead, light wavy hair, and gray eyes, very +penetrating and bright. There was a pleasing kind of eagerness and +volubility in his manner of talking, and a slight imperfection, not +amounting to a lisp, in his utterance, which imparted a naive charm to +his speech. He used expressive and rapid gestures with his hands and +arms, and there was a magnetism, a fascination, about the whole man +that strongly impressed me. I was at that period much more susceptible +of impressions, and prone to yield to them, than I am now. Paton's +rattling vivacity, his knowledge of the world, his entertaining talk +and stories, his curiosity, enterprise, and audacity, took me by storm; +he was my opposite in temperament and character, and it seemed to me +that he had most of the advantages on his side. Nevertheless, he +professed, and I still believe he felt, a great liking for me, and we +speedily came to an agreement to seek a lodging together. On the second +day of our search, we found just what we wanted. + +It was an old house, on the outskirts of the town, standing by itself, +with a small garden behind it. It had formerly been occupied by an +Austrian baron, and it was probably not less than two hundred years +old. The baron's family had died out, or been dispersed, and now the +venerable edifice was let, in the German fashion, in separate floors or +_etages_, communicating with a central staircase. Some alterations +rendered necessary by this modification had been made, but +substantially the house was unchanged. Our apartment comprised four or +five rooms on the left of the landing and at the top of the house, +which consisted of three stories. The chief room was the parlor, which +looked down through a square bow-window on the street. This room was of +irregular shape, one end being narrower than the other, and nearly +fitting the space at this end was a kind of projecting shelf or +mantelpiece (only, of course, there was no fireplace under it, open +fireplaces being unknown in Germany), upon which rested an old cracked +looking-glass, made in two compartments, the frame of which, black with +age and fly-spots, was fastened against the wall. The shelf was +supported by two pilasters; but the object of the whole structure was a +mystery; so far as appeared, it served no purpose but to support the +looking-glass, which might just as well have been suspended from a nail +in the wall. Paton, I remember, betrayed a great deal of curiosity +about it; and since the consideration of the problem was more in his +line of business than in mine, I left it to him. At the opposite end of +the room stood a tall earthenware stove. The walls were wainscoted five +feet up from the dark polished floor, and were hung with several smoky +old paintings, of no great artistic value. The chairs and tables were +plain, but very heavy and solid, and of a dark hue like the room. The +window was nearly as wide as it was high, and opened laterally from the +center on hinges. The other rooms were of the same general appearance, +but smaller. We both liked the place, and soon made ourselves very +comfortable in it. I hired a piano, and had it conveyed upstairs to the +parlor; while Paton disposed his architectural paraphernalia on and in +the massive writing-table near the window. Our cooking and other +household duties were done for us by the wife of the _portier_, +the official corresponding to the French _concierge_, who, in all +German houses, attends at the common door, and who, in this case, lived +in a couple of musty little closets opening into the lower hall, and +eked out his official salary by cobbling shoes. He was an odd, +grotesque humorist, of most ungainly exterior, black haired and +bearded, with a squint, a squab nose, and a short but very powerful +figure. Dirty he was beyond belief, and he was abominably fragrant of +vile tobacco. For my part, I could not endure this fellow; but Paton, +who had much more of what he called human nature in him than I had, +established friendly relations with him at once, and reported that he +found him very amusing. It was characteristic of Paton that, though he +knew much less about the German language than I did, he could +understand and make himself understood in it much better; and, when we +were in company, it was always he who did the talking. + +It would never have occurred to me to wonder, much less to inquire, who +might be the occupants of the other _etages_; but Paton was more +enterprising, and before we had been settled three days in our new +quarters, he had gathered from his friend the portier, and from other +sources, all the obtainable information on the subject. The information +was of no particular interest, however, except as regarded the persons +who dwelt on the floor immediately below us. They were two--an old man +and a young woman, supposed to be his daughter. They had been living +here several years--from before the time, indeed, that the portier had +occupied his present position. In all these years the old man was known +to have been out of his room only twice. He was certainly an eccentric +person, and was said to be a miser and extremely wealthy. The portier +further averred that his property--except such small portion of it as +was invested and on the income of which he lived--was realized in the +form of diamonds and other precious stones, which, for greater +security, he always carried, waking or sleeping, in a small leathern +bag, fastened round his neck by a fine steel chain. His daughter was +scarcely less a mystery than he, for, though she went out as often as +twice or thrice a week, she was always closely veiled, and her figure +was so disguised by the long cloak she wore that it was impossible to +say whether she were graceful or deformed, beautiful or ugly. The +balance of belief, however, was against her being attractive in any +respect. The name by which the old miser was known was Kragendorf; but, +as the portier sagaciously remarked, there was no knowing, in such +cases, whether the name a man bore was his own or somebody's else. + +This Kragendorf mystery was another source of apparently inexhaustible +interest to Paton, who was fertile in suggestions as to how it might be +explained or penetrated. I believe he and the portier talked it over at +great length, but, so far as I am aware, without arriving at any +solution. I took little heed of the matter, being now fully absorbed in +my studies; and it is to be hoped that Herr Kragendorf was not of a +nervous temperament, otherwise he must have inveighed profanely against +the constant piano-practice that went on over his head. I also had a +violin, on which I flattered myself I could perform with a good deal of +expression, and by and by, in the long, still evenings--it was +November, but the temperature was still mild--I got into the habit of +strolling along the less frequented streets, with my violin under my +shoulder, drawing from it whatever music my heart desired. Occasionally +I would pause at some convenient spot, lean against a wall, and give +myself up to improvisation. At such times a little cluster of auditors +would gradually collect in front of me, listening for the most part +silently, or occasionally giving vent to low grunts and interjections +of approval. One evening, I remember, a young woman joined the group, +though keeping somewhat in the background; she listened intently, and +after a time gradually turned her face toward me, unconsciously as it +were; and the light of a street-lamp at a little distance revealed a +countenance youthful, pale, sad, and exquisitely beautiful. It +impressed me as with a vague reminiscence of something I had seen or +imagined--some pictured face, perhaps, caught in a glance and never to +be identified. Her eyes finally met mine; I stopped playing. She +started, gave me an alarmed look, and, gliding swiftly away, +disappeared. I could not forget this incident; it haunted me strangely +and persistently. Many a time thereafter I revisited the same spot, and +drew together other audiences, but the delicate girl with the dark-blue +eyes and the tender, sensitive mouth, was never again among them. + +It was at this epoch, I think, that the inexhaustible Paton made a +discovery. From my point of view it was not a discovery of any moment; +but, as usual, he took interest in it enough for both of us. It +appeared that, in attempting to doctor the crack in the old looking- +glass, a large piece of the plate had got loose, and come away in his +hands; and in the space behind he had detected a paper, carefully +folded and tied up with a piece of faded ribbon. Paton was never in the +habit of hampering himself with fine-drawn scruples, and he had no +hesitation in opening the folded paper and spreading it out on the +table. Judging from the glance I gave it, it seemed to be a confused +and abstruse mixture of irregular geometrical figures and cramped +German chirography. But Paton set to work upon it with as much +concentration as if it had been a recipe for the Philosopher's Stone; +he reproduced the lines and angles on fresh paper, and labored over the +writing with a magnifying-glass and a dictionary. At times he would +mutter indistinctly to himself, lift his eyebrows, nod or shake his +head, bite his lips, and rub his forehead, and anon fall to work again +with fresh vigor. At last he leaned back in his chair, thumped his hand +on the table, and laughed. + +"Got it!" he exclaimed. "Say, John, old boy, I've got it! and it's the +most curious old thing ever you saw in your life!" + +"Something in analytical geometry, isn't it?" said I, turning round on +my piano-stool. + +"Analytical pudding's end! It's a plan of a house, my boy, and, what's +more, of this very house we're in! That's a find, and no mistake! These +are the descriptions and explanations--these bits of writing. It's a +perfect labyrinth of Crete! Udolpho was nothing to it!" + +"Well, I suppose it isn't of much value except as a curiosity?" + +"Don't be too sure of that, John, my boy! Who knows but there's a +treasure concealed somewhere in this house? or a skeleton in a secret +chamber! This old paper may make our fortune yet!" + +"The treasure wouldn't belong to us if we found it; and, besides, we +can't make explorations beyond our own premises, and we know what's in +them already." + +"Do we? Did we know what was behind the looking-glass? Did you never +hear of sliding panels, and private passages, and concealed staircases? +Where's your imagination, man? But you don't need imagination--here it +is in black and white!" + +As he spoke, he pointed to a part of the plan; but, as I was stooping +to examine it, he seemed to change his mind. + +"No matter," he exclaimed, suddenly folding up the paper and rising +from his chair. "You're not an architect, and you can't be expected to +go in for these things. No; there's no practical use in it, of course. +But secret passages were always a hobby of mine. Well, what are you +going to do this evening? Come over to the cafe and have a game of +billiards!" + +"No; I shall go to bed early to-night." + +"You sleep too much," said Paton. "Everybody does, if my father, +instead of inventing a way of promoting sleep, had invented a way of +doing without it, he'd have been the richest man in America to-day. +However, do as you like. I sha'n't be back till late." + +He put on his hat and sallied forth with a cigar in his mouth. Paton +was of rather a convivial turn; he liked to have a good time, as he +called it; and, indeed, he seemed to think that the chief end of man +was to get money enough to have a good time continually, a sort of good +eternity. His head was strong, and he could stand a great deal of +liquor; and I have seen him sip and savor a glass of raw brandy or +whisky as another man would a glass of Madeira. In this, and the other +phases of his life about town, I had no participation, being +constitutionally as well as by training averse therefrom; and he, on +the other hand, would never have listened to my sage advice to modify +his loose habits. Our companionship was apart from these things; and, +as I have said, I found in him a good deal that I could sympathize +with, without approaching the moralities. + +That night, after I had been for some time asleep, I awoke and found +myself listening to a scratching and shoving noise that seemed quite +unaccountable. By-and-by it made me uneasy. I got up and went toward +the parlor, from which the noise proceeded. On reaching the doorway, I +saw Paton on his knees before one of the pilasters in the narrow end of +the room; a candle was on the floor beside him, and he was busily at +work at something, though what it was I could not make out. The creak +of the threshold under my foot caused him to look round. He started +violently, and sprang to his feet. + +"Oh! it's you, is it?" he said, after a moment. "Great Scott! how you +scared me! I was--I dropped a bit of money hereabouts, and I was +scraping about to find it. No matter--it wasn't much! Sorry I disturbed +you, old boy." And, laughing, he picked up his candle and went into his +own room. + +From this time there was a change vaguely perceptible in our mutual +relations; we chatted together less than before, and did not see so +much of each other. Paton was apt to be out when I was at home, and +generally sat up after I was abed. He seemed to be busy about +something--something connected with his profession, I judged; but, +contrary to his former custom, he made no attempt to interest me in it. +To tell the truth, I had begun to realize that our different tastes and +pursuits must lead us further and further apart, and that our +separation could be only a question of time. Paton was a materialist, +and inclined to challenge all the laws and convictions that mankind has +instituted and adopted; there was no limit to his radicalism. For +example, on coming in one day, I found him with a curious antique +poniard in his hands, which he had probably bought in some old +curiosity shop. At first I fancied he meant to conceal it; but, if so, +he changed his mind. + +"What do you think of that?" he said, holding it out to me. "There's a +solution of continuity for you! Mind you don't prick yourself! It's +poisoned up to the hilt!" + +"What do you want of such a thing?" I asked. + +"Well, killing began with Cain, and isn't likely to go out of fashion +in our day. I might find it convenient to give one of my friends--you, +for instance--a reminder of his mortality some time. You'll say murder +is immoral. Bless you, man, we never could do without it! No man dies +before his time, and some one dies every day that some one else may +live." + +This was said in a jocose way, and, of course, Paton did not mean it. +But it affected me unpleasantly nevertheless. + +As I was washing my hands in my room, I happened to look out of my +window, which commanded a view of the garden at the back of the house. +It was an hour after sunset, and the garden was nearly dark; but I +caught a movement of something below, and, looking more closely, I +recognized the ugly figure of the portier. He seemed to be tying +something to the end of a long slender pole, like a gigantic fishing- +rod; and presently he advanced beneath my window, and raised the pole +as high as it would go against the wall of the house. The point he +touched was the sill of the window below mine--probably that of the +bedroom of Herr Kragendorf. At this juncture the portier seemed to be +startled at something--possibly he saw me at my window; at all events, +he lowered his pole and disappeared in the house. + +The next day Paton made an announcement that took me by surprise. He +said he had made up his mind to quit Germany, and that very shortly. He +mentioned having received letters from home, and declared he had got, +or should soon have got, all he wanted out of this country. "I'm going +to stop paying money for instruction," he said, "and begin to earn it +by work. I shall stay another week, but then I'm off. Too slow here for +me! I want to be in the midst of things, using my time." + +I did not attempt to dissuade him; in fact, my first feeling was rather +one of relief; and this Paton, with his quick preceptions, was probably +aware of. + +"Own up, old boy!" he said, laughing; "you'll be able to endure my +absence. And yet you needn't think of me as worse than anybody else. If +everybody were musicians and moralists, it would be nice, no doubt; but +one might get tired of it in time, and then what would you do? You must +give the scamps and adventurers their innings, after all! They may not +do much good, but they give the other fellows occupation. I was born +without my leave being asked, and I may act as suits me without asking +anybody's leave." + +This was said on a certain bright morning after our first fall of snow; +the tiled roofs of the houses were whitened with it, it cushioned the +window-sills, and spread a sparkling blankness over the garden. In the +streets it was already melting, and people were slipping and splashing +on the wet and glistening pavements. After gazing out at this scene for +a while, in a mood of unwonted thoughtfulness, Paton yawned, stretched +himself, and declared his intention of taking a stroll before dinner. +Accordingly he lit a cigar and went forth. I watched him go down the +street and turn the corner. + +An hour afterward, just when dinner was on the table, I heard an +unusual noise and shuffling on the stairs, and a heavy knock on the +door. I opened it, and saw four men bearing on a pallet the form of my +friend Paton. A police officer accompanied them. They brought Paton in, +and laid him on his bed. The officer told me briefly what had happened, +gave me certain directions, and, saying that a surgeon would arrive +immediately, he departed with the four men tramping behind him. + +Paton had slipped in going across the street, and a tramway car had run +over him. He was not dead, though almost speechless; but his injuries +were such that it was impossible that he should recover. He kept his +eyes upon me; they were as bright as ever, though his face was deadly +pale. He seemed to be trying to read my thoughts--to find out my +feeling about him, and my opinion of his condition. I was terribly +shocked and grieved, and my face no doubt showed it. By-and-by I saw +his lips move, and bent down to listen. + +"Confounded nuisance!" he whispered faintly in my car. "It's all right, +though; I'm not going to die this time. I've got something to do, and +I'm going to do it--devil take me if I don't!" + +He was unable to say more, and soon after the surgeon came in. He made +an examination, and it was evident that he had no hope. His shrug of +the shoulders was not lost upon Paton, who frowned, and made a defiant +movement of the lip. But presently he said to me, still in the same +whisper, "John, if that old fool should be right--he won't be, but in +case of accidents--you must take charge of my things--the papers, and +all. I'll make you heir of my expectations! Write out a declaration to +that effect: I can sign my name; and he'll be witness." + +I did as he directed, and having explained to the surgeon the nature of +the document, I put the pen in Paton's hand; but was obliged to guide +his hand with my own in order to make an intelligible signature. The +surgeon signed below, and Paton seemed satisfied. He closed his eyes; +his sufferings appeared to be very slight. But, even while I was +looking at him, a change came over his face--a deadly change. His eyes +opened; they were no longer bright, but sunken and dull. He gave me a +dusky look--whether of rage, of fear, or of entreaty, I could not tell. +His lips parted, and a voice made itself audible; not like his own +voice, but husky and discordant. "I'm going," it said. "But look out +for me.... Do it yourself!" + +"Der Herr ist todt" (the man is dead), said the surgeon the next +minute. + +It was true. Paton had gone out of this life at an hour's warning. What +purpose or desire his last words indicated, there was nothing to show. +He was dead; and yet I could hardly believe that it was so. He had been +so much alive; so full of schemes and enterprises. Nothing now was left +but that crushed and haggard figure, stiffening on the bed; nothing, at +least, that mortal senses could take cognizance of. It was a strange +thought. + +Paton's funeral took place a few days afterward. I returned from the +graveyard weary in body and mind. At the door of the house stood the +portier, who nodded to me, and said, + +"A very sad thing to happen, worthy sir; but so it is in the world. Of +all the occupants of this house, one would have said the one least +likely to be dead to-day was Herr Jeffries. Heh! if I had been the good +Providence, I would have made away with the old gentleman of the +_etage_ below, who is of no use to anybody." + +This, for lack of a better, was Paton's funeral oration. I climbed the +three flights of stairs and let myself into our apartment--mine +exclusively now. The place was terribly lonely; much more so than if +Paton had been alive anywhere in the world. But he was dead; and, if +his own philosophy were true, he was annihilated. But it was not true! +How distinct and minute was my recollection of him--his look, his +gestures, the tones of his voice. I could almost see him before me; my +memory of him dead seemed clearer than when he was alive. In that +invisible world of the mind was he not living still, and perhaps not +far away. + +I sat down at the table where he had been wont to work, and unlocked +the drawers in which he kept his papers. These, or some of them, I took +out and spread before me. But I found it impossible, as yet, to +concentrate my attention upon them; I pushed back my chair, and, +rising, went to the piano. Here I remained for perhaps a couple of +hours, striking the vague chords that echo wandering thoughts. I was +trying to banish this haunting image of Paton from my mind, and at +length I partly succeeded. + +All at once, however, the impression of him (as I may call it) came +back with a force and vividness that startled me. I stopped playing, +and sat for a minute perfectly still. I felt that Paton was in the +room; that if I looked round I should see him. I however restrained +myself from looking round with all the strength of my will--wherefore I +know not. What I felt was not fear, but the conviction that I was on +the brink of a fearful and unprecedented experience--an experience +that would not leave me as it found me. This strange struggle with +myself taxed all my powers; the sweat started out on my forehead. At +last the moment came when I could struggle no longer. I laid my hand on +the keyboard, and pushed myself round on the stool. There was a +momentary dazzle before my eyes, and after that I saw plainly. My hand, +striking the keys, had produced a jarring discord; and while this was +yet tingling in my ears, Paton, who was sitting in his old place at the +table, with his back toward me, faced about in his chair, and his eyes +met mine. I thought he smiled. + +My excitement was past, and was succeeded by a dead calm. I examined +him critically. His appearance was much the same as when in life; nay, +he was even more like himself than before. The subtle or crafty +expression which had always been discernible in his features was now +intensified, and there was something wild and covertly fierce in the +shining of his gray eyes, something that his smile was unable to +disguise. What was human and genial in my former friend had passed +away, and what remained was evil--the kind of evil that I now perceived +to have been at the base of his nature. It was a revelation of +character terrible in its naked completeness. I knew at a glance that +Paton must always have been a far more wicked man that I had ever +imagined; and in his present state all the remains of goodness had been +stripped away, and nothing but wickedness was left. + +I felt impelled, by an impulse for which I could not account, to +approach the table and examine the papers once more; and now it entered +into my mind to perceive a certain method and meaning in them that had +been hidden from me before. It was as though I were looking at them +through Paton's intelligence, and with his memory. He had in some way +ceased to be visible to me; but I became aware that he wished me to sit +down in his chair, and I did so. Under his guidance, and in obedience +to a will that seemed to be my own, and yet was in direct opposition to +my real will, I began a systematic study of the papers. Paton, +meanwhile, remained close to me, though I could no longer see him; but +I felt the gaze of his fierce, shining eyes, and his crafty, evil +smile. I soon obtained a tolerable insight into what the papers meant, +and what was the scheme in which Paton had been so much absorbed at the +time of his death, and which he had been so loath to abandon. + +It was a wicked and cruel scheme, worked out to the smallest +particular. But, though I understood its hideousness intellectually, it +aroused in mo no corresponding emotion; my sensitiveness to right arid +wrong seemed stupefied or inoperative. I could say, "This is wicked," +but I could not awaken in myself a horror of committing the wickedness; +and, moreover, I knew that, if the influence Paton was able to exercise +over me continued, I must in due time commit it. + +Presently I became aware, or, to speak more accurately, I seemed to +remember, that there was something in Paton's room which it was +incumbent on me to procure. I went thither, lifted up a corner of the +rag between the bed and the stove, and beheld, in an aperture in the +floor, of the existence of which I had till now known nothing, the +antique poisoned dagger that Paton had showed me a few weeks before, +and which I had not seen since then. I brought it back to the sitting- +room, put it in a drawer of the table, and locked the drawer, at the +same time making a mental note to the effect that I should reopen the +drawer at a certain hour of the night and take the dagger out. All this +while Paton was close at hand, though not visible to sight; but I had a +sort of inner perception of his presence and movements. All at once, at +about the hour of sunset, I saw him again; he moved toward the looking- +glass at the narrow end of the room, laid his hand upon one of the +pilasters, glanced at me over his shoulder, and immediately seemed to +stoop down. As I sat, the edge of the table hid him from sight. I stood +up and looked across. He was not there; and a kind of reaction of my +nerves informed me that he was gone absolutely, for the time. + +This reaction produced a lassitude impossible to describe; it was +overpowering, and I had no choice but to yield to it. I dropped back in +my chair, leaned forward on the table, and instantly fell into a heavy +sleep, or stupor. + +I awoke abruptly, with a sensation as if a hand had been laid on my +shoulder. It was night, and I knew that the hour I had noted in my mind +was at hand. I opened the drawer and took out the dagger, which I put +in my pocket. The house was quite silent. A shiver passed through me. I +was aware that Paton was standing at the narrow end of the room, +waiting for me: Yes--there he was, or the impression of him in my +brain--what did it matter? I arose mechanically and walked toward him. +He had no need to direct me: I knew all there was to do, and how to do +it. I knelt on the floor, laid my shoulder against the pilaster, and +pushed it laterally. It moved aside on a pivot, disclosing an iron ring +let into the floor. I laid hold of this ring, and lifted. A section of +the floor came up, and I saw a sort of ladder descending +perpendicularly into darkness. Down the ladder Paton went, and I +followed him. Arrived at the bottom, I turned to the left, led by an +instinct or a fascination; passed along a passage barely wide enough to +admit me, until I came against a smooth, hard surface. I passed my hand +over it until I touched a knob or catch, which I pressed, and the +surface gave way before me like a door. I stumbled forward, and found +myself in a room of what was doubtless Herr Kragendorf's apartment. A +keen, cold air smote against my face; and with it came a sudden influx +of strength and self-possession. I felt that, for a moment at least, +the fatal influence of Paton upon me was broken. But what was that +sound of a struggle--those cries and gasps, that seemed to come from an +adjoining room? + +I sprang forward, opened a door, and beheld a tall old man, with white +hair and beard, in the grasp of a ruffian whom I at once recognized as +the portier. A broken window showed how he had effected his entrance. +One hand held the old man by the throat; in the other was a knife, +which he was prevented from using by a young woman, who had flung +herself upon him in such a way as to trammel his movements. In another +moment, however, he would have shaken her off. + +But that moment was not allowed him. I seized him with a strength that +amazed myself--a strength which never came upon me before or since. The +conflict lasted but a breath or two; I hurled him to the floor, and, as +he fell, his right arm was doubled under him, and the knife which he +held entered his back beneath the left shoulder-blade. When I rose up +from the whirl and fury of the struggle, I saw the old man reclining +exhausted on the bosom of the girl. I knew him, despite his white hair +and beard. And the face that bent so lovingly above him was the face +that had looked into mine that night on the street--the face of the +blue-eyed maiden--of a younger and a lovelier Juliet! As I gazed, there +came a thundering summons at the door, and the police entered. + + * * * * * + +My poor uncle Koerner had not prospered after his great stroke of +roguery. His wife had died of a broken heart, after giving birth to a +daughter, and his stolen riches had vanished almost as rapidly as they +were acquired. He had at last settled down with his daughter in this +old house. The treasure in the leathern bag, though a treasure to him, +was not of a nature to excite general cupidity. It consisted, not of +precious stones, but of relics of his dead wife--her rings, a lock of +her hair, her letters, a miniature of her in a gold case. These poor +keepsakes, and his daughter, had been the only solace of his lonely and +remorseful life. + +It was uncertain whether Paton and the portier had planned the robbery +together, or separately, and in ignorance of each other's purpose. Nor +can I tell whether my disembodied visitor came to me with good or with +evil intent. Wicked spirits, even when they seem to have power to carry +out their purposes, are perhaps only permitted to do so, so far as is +consistent with an overruling good of which they know nothing. +Certainly, if I had not descended the secret passage, Koerner would have +been killed, and perhaps my Juliet likewise--the mother of my children. +But should I have been led on to stab him myself, with the poisoned +dagger, had the portier not been there? Juliet smiles and says No, and +I am glad to agree with her. But I have never since then found that +anniversary upon me, without a shudder of awe, and a dark thought of +Paton Jeffries. + + + + +THE END. + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of David Poindexter's Disappearance and +Other Tales, by Julian Hawthorne + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE *** + +This file should be named 7dpdp10.txt or 7dpdp10.zip +Corrected EDITIONS of our eBooks get a new NUMBER, 7dpdp11.txt +VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, 7dpdp10a.txt + +This eBook was produced by Michelle Shephard, Eric Eldred, +Charles Franks and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team + +Project Gutenberg eBooks are often created from several printed +editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the US +unless a copyright notice is included. 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Please do not remove it. Do not change or edit the +header without written permission. + +Please read the "legal small print," and other information about the +eBook and Project Gutenberg at the bottom of this file. Included is +important information about your specific rights and restrictions in +how the file may be used. You can also find out about how to make a +donation to Project Gutenberg, and how to get involved. + + +**Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** + +**eBooks Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** + +*****These eBooks Were Prepared By Thousands of Volunteers!***** + + +Title: David Poindexter's Disappearance and Other Tales + +Author: Julian Hawthorne + +Release Date: December, 2004 [EBook #7057] +[Yes, we are more than one year ahead of schedule] +[This file was first posted on March 3, 2003] + +Edition: 10 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: Latin-1 + +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE *** + + + + +This eBook was produced by Michelle Shephard, Eric Eldred, +Charles Franks and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team + + + + + +DAVID POINDEXTER'S +DISAPPEARANCE +_AND OTHER TALES_ + +BY +JULIAN HAWTHORNE + + + + +CONTENTS. + + + DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE + KEN'S MYSTERY + "WHEN HALF-GODS GO, THE GODS ARRIVE" + "SET NOT THY FOOT ON GRAVES" + MY FRIEND PATON + + + + +DAVID POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE. + + +Among the records of the English state trials are to be found many +strange stories, which would, as the phrase is, make the fortune of a +modern novelist. But there are also numerous cases, not less +stimulating to imagination and curiosity, which never attained more +than local notoriety, of which the law was able to take but +comparatively small cognizance, although they became subjects of much +unofficial discussion and mystification. Among these cases none, +perhaps, is better worth recalling than that of David Poindexter. It +will be my aim here to tell the tale as simply and briefly as possible +--to repeat it, indeed, very much as it came to my ears while living, +several years ago, near the scene in which its events took place. There +is a temptation to amplify it, and to give it a more recent date and a +different setting; but (other considerations aside) the story might +lose in force and weight more than it would thereby gain in artistic +balance and smoothness. + +David Poindexter was a younger son of an old and respected family in +Sussex, England. He was born in London in 1785. He was educated at +Oxford, with a view to his entering the clerical profession, and in the +year 1810 he obtained a living in the little town of Witton, near +Twickenham, known historically as the home of Sir John Suckling. The +Poindexters had been much impoverished by the excesses of David's +father and grandfather, and David seems to have had few or no resources +beyond the very modest stipend appertaining to his position. He was, at +all events, poor, though possessed of capacities which bade fair to +open to him some of the higher prizes of his calling; but, on the other +hand, there is evidence that he chafed at his poverty, and reason to +believe that he had inherited no small share of the ill-regulated +temperament which had proved so detrimental to the elder generations of +his family. + +Personally he was a man of striking aspect, having long, dark hair, +heavily-marked eyebrows, and blue eyes; his mouth and chin were +graceful in contour, but wanting in resolution; his figure was tall, +well knit, and slender. He was an eloquent preacher, and capable, when +warmed by his subject, of powerfully affecting the emotions of his +congregation. He was a great favorite with women--whom, however, he +uniformly treated with coldness--and by no means unpopular with men, +toward some of whom he manifested much less reserve. Nevertheless, +before the close of the second year of his incumbency he was known to +be paying his addresses to a young lady of the neighborhood, Miss Edith +Saltine, the only child of an ex-army officer. The colonel was a +widower, and in poor health, and since he was living mainly on his +half-pay, and had very little to give his daughter, the affair was +looked upon as a love match, the rather since Edith was a handsome +young woman of charming character. The Reverend David Poindexter +certainly had every appearance of being deeply in love; and it is often +seen that the passions of reserved men, when once aroused, are stronger +than those of persons more generally demonstrative. + +Colonel Saltine did not at first receive his proposed son-in-law with +favor. He was a valetudinarian, and accustomed to regard his daughter +as his nurse by right, and he resented the idea of her leaving him +forlorn for the sake of a good-looking parson. It is very likely that +his objections might have had the effect of breaking off the match, for +his daughter was devotedly attached to him, and hardly questioned his +right to dispose of her as he saw fit; but after a while the worthy +gentleman seems to have thought better of his contrariness. Poindexter +had strong persuasive powers, and no doubt made himself personally +agreeable to the colonel, and, moreover, it was arranged that the +latter should occupy the same house with Mr. and Mrs. Poindexter after +they were married. Nevertheless, the colonel was not a man to move +rapidly, and the engagement had worn along for nearly a year without +the wedding-day having been fixed. One winter evening in the early part +of December, Poindexter dined with the colonel and Edith, and as the +gentlemen were sitting over their wine the lover spoke on the topic +that was uppermost in his thoughts, and asked his host whether there +was any good reason why the marriage should not be consummated at once. + +"Christmas is at hand," the young man remarked; "why should it not be +rendered doubly memorable by granting this great boon?" + +"For a parson, David, you are a deuced impatient man," the colonel +said. + +"Parsons are human," the other exclaimed with warmth. + +"Humph! I suppose some of them are. In fact, David, if I didn't believe +that there was something more in you than texts and litanies and the +Athanasian creed, I'll be hanged if I'd ever have let you look twice at +Edith. That girl has got blood in her veins, David; she's not to be +thrown away on any lantern-jawed, white-livered doctor of souls, I can +tell you." + +David held his head down, and seemed not to intend a reply; but he +suddenly raised his eyes, and fixed them upon the colonel's. "You know +what my father was," he said, in a low, distinct voice; "I am my +father's son." + +"That idea has occurred to me more than once, David, and to say the +truth, I've liked you none the less for it. But, then, what the deuce +should a fellow like you want to do in a pulpit? I respect the cloth as +much as any man, I hope, but leaving theory aside, and coming down to +practice, aren't there fools and knaves enough in the world to carry on +that business, without a fellow of heart and spirit like you going into +it?" + +"Theory or no theory, there have been as great men in the pulpit as in +any other position," said David, gloomily. + +"I don't say to the contrary: ecclesiastical history, and all that: but +what I do say is, if a man is great in the pulpit, it's a pity he isn't +somewhere else, where he could use his greatness to more advantage." + +"Well," remarked David, in the same somber tone, "I am not contented: +so much I can admit to the father of the woman I love. But you know as +well as I do that men nowadays are called to my profession not so much +by the Divine summons as by the accident of birth. Were it not for the +law of primogeniture, Colonel Saltine, the Church of England would be, +for the most part, a congregation without a clergyman." + +"Gad! I'm much of your opinion," returned the colonel, with a grin; +"but there are two doors, you know, for a second son to enter the world +by. If he doesn't fancy a cassock, he can put on His Majesty's +uniform." + +"Neither the discipline nor the activity of a soldier's life would suit +me," David answered. "So far as I know my own nature, what it craves is +freedom, and the enjoyment of its capacities. Only under such +conditions could I show what I am capable of. In other words," he +added, with a short laugh, "ten thousand a year is the profession I +should choose." + +"Ah," murmured the colonel, heaving a sigh, "I doubt that's a +profession we'd all of us like to practice as well as preach. What! no +more wine? Oh, ay, Edith, of course! Well, go to her, sir, if you must; +but when you come to my age you'll have found out which wears the best +--woman or the bottle. I'll join you presently, and maybe we'll see +what can be done about this marrying business." + +So David went to Edith, and they had a clear hour together before they +heard the colonel's slippered tread hobbling through the hall. Just +before he opened the door, David had said: "I sometimes doubt whether +you wholly love me, after all." And she had answered: + +"If I do not, it is because I sometimes feel as if you were not your +real self." + +The colonel heard nothing of this odd bit of dialogue; but when he had +subsided, with his usual grunt, into his arm-chair beside the fire- +place, and Edith had brought him his foot-stool and his pipe, and pat +the velvet skull cap on his bald pate, he drew a long whiff of tobacco +smoke, and said: + +"If you young folks want to set up housekeeping a month from to-day, +you can do it, for all I care." + +Little did any one of the three suspect what that month was destined to +bring forth. + +David Poindexter's father had been married twice, his second wife dying +within a year of her wedding-day, and two weeks after bringing David +into the world. This lady, whose maiden name was Lambert, had a brother +who was a gentleman farmer, and a tolerably successful one. His farm +was situated in the parish of Witton, and he owned a handsome house on +the outskirts of the town itself. He and David's father had been at one +time great friends, insomuch that David was named after him, and +Lambert, as his godfather as well as uncle, presented the child with +the usual silver mug. Lambert was never known to have married, but +there were rumors, dating as far as back David's earliest +recollections, to the effect that he had entertained a secret and +obscure passion for some foreign woman of great beauty, but of doubtful +character and antecedents. Nobody could be found who had ever seen this +woman, or would accept the responsibility of asserting that she +actually existed; but she afforded a convenient means of accounting for +many things that seemed mysterious in Mr. Lambert's conduct. At length, +when David was about eight years old, his godfather left England +abruptly, and without telling any one whither he was going or when he +would return. As a matter of fact he never did return, nor had any +certain news ever been heard of him since his departure. Neither his +house nor his farm was ever sold, however, though they were rented to +more than one tenant during a number of years. It was said, also, that +Lambert held possession of some valuable real estate in London. +Nevertheless, in process of time he was forgotten, or remembered only +as a name. And the new generation of men, though they might speak of +"the old Lambert House," neither knew nor cared how it happened to have +that title. For aught they could tell, it might have borne it ever +since Queen Elizabeth's time. Even David Poindexter had long ceased to +think of his uncle as anything much more substantial than a dream. + +He was all the more surprised, therefore, when, on the day following +the interview just mentioned, he received a letter from the late David +Lambert's lawyers. It informed him in substance that his uncle had died +in Constantinople, unmarried (so far as could be ascertained), +intestate, and without blood-relations surviving him. Under these +circumstances, his property, amounting to one hundred and sixty +thousand pounds, the bulk of which was invested in land and houses in +the city of London, as well as the country-seat in Witton known as the +old Lambert House, and the farm lands thereto appertaining--all this +wealth, not to mention four or five thousand pounds in ready money, +came into possession of the late David Lambert's nearest of kin, who, +as it appeared, was none other than the Reverend David Poindexter. +"Would that gentleman, therefore be kind enough, at his convenience, to +advise his obedient servants as to what disposition he wished to make +of his inheritance?" + +It was a Saturday morning, and the young clergyman was sitting at his +study table; the fire was burning in the grate at his right hand, and +his half-written sermon lay on the desk before him. After reading the +letter, at first hurriedly and amazedly, afterward more slowly, with +frequent pauses, he folded it up, and, still holding it in his hand, +leaned back in his chair, and remained for the better part of an hour +in a state of deep preoccupation. Many changing expressions passed +across his face, and glowed in his dark-blue eyes, and trembled on the +curves of his lips. At last he roused himself, sat erect, and smote the +table violently with his clinched hand. Yes, it was true it was real; +he, David Poindexter, an hour ago the poor imprisoned clergyman of the +Church of England--he, as by a stroke of magic, was free, powerful, +emancipated, the heir of seven thousand pounds a year! And what about +tomorrow's sermon? + +He rose up smiling, with a vivid color in his cheeks and a bright +sparkle in his eyes. He stretched himself to his full height, threw out +his arms, and smote his chest with both fists. What a load was gone +from his heart! What a new ardor of life was this that danced in his +veins! He walked with long strides to the window, and threw it wide +open, breathing in the rush of bright icy air with deep inhalations. +Freedom! emancipation! Yonder, above the dark, level boughs of the +cedar of Lebanon, rose the square, gray tower of the church. Yesterday +it was the incubus of his vain hopes; to-day it was the tomb of a dead +and despised past. What had David Poindexter to do with calling sinners +to repentance? Let him first find out for himself what sin was like. +Then he looked to the right, where between the leafless trees Colonel +Saltine's little dwelling raised its red-tile roof above the high +garden-wall. And so, Edith, you doubted whether I were at all times my +real self? You shall not need to make that complaint hereafter. As for +to-morrow's sermon--I am not he who wrote sermons, nor shall I ever +preach any. Away with it, therefore! + +He strode back to the table, took up the sheets of manuscript from the +desk, tore them across, and laid them on the burning coals. They +smoldered for a moment, then blazed up, and the draught from the open +window whisked the blackened ashes up the chimney. David stood, +meanwhile, with his arms folded, smiling to himself, and repeating, in +a low voice: + +"Never again--never again--never again." + +By-and-by he reseated himself at his desk, and hurriedly wrote two or +three notes, one of which was directed to Miss Saltine. He gave them to +his servant with an injunction to deliver them at their addresses +during the afternoon. Looking at his watch, he was surprised to find +that it was already past twelve o'clock. He went up-stairs, packed a +small portmanteau, made some changes in his dress, and came down again +with a buoyant step. There was a decanter half full of sherry on the +sideboard in the dining-room; he poured out and drank two glasses in +succession. This done, he put on his hat, and left the house with his +portmanteau in his hand, and ten minutes later he had intercepted the +London coach, and was bowling along on his way to the city. + +There was a dramatic instinct in David, as in many eloquent men of +impressionable temperament, which caused him every now and then to look +upon all that was occurring as a sort of play, and to resolve to act +his part in a telling and picturesque manner. On that Saturday +afternoon he had an interview with the late Mr. Lambert's lawyers, and +they were struck by his calm, lofty, and indifferent bearing. He seemed +to regard worldly prosperity as a thing beneath him, yet to feel in a +half-impatient way the responsibility which the control of wealth +forced upon him. + +"It is my purpose not to allow this legacy to interfere permanently +with my devotion to my higher duties," he remarked, "but I have taken +measures to enable myself to place these affairs upon a fixed and +convenient footing. I presume," he added, fixing his eyes steadily upon +his interlocutor, "that you have thoroughly investigated the +possibility of there being any claimant nearer than myself?" + +"No such claimant could exist," the lawyer replied, "unless the late +Mr. Lambert had married and had issue." + +"Is there, then, any reason to suppose that he contemplated the +contingency that has happened?" + +"If he bestowed any thought at all upon the subject, that contingency +could hardly have failed to present itself to his mind," the lawyer +answered. + +David consented to receive the draft for a thousand pounds which was +tendered him, and took his leave. He returned to his rooms at the +Tavistock Hotel, Covent Garden. In the evening, after making some +changes in his costume, he went to the theatre, and saw Kean play +something of Shakespeare's. When the play was over, and he was out in +the frosty air again, he felt it impossible to sleep. It was after +midnight before he returned to his hotel, with flushed cheeks, and a +peculiar brilliance in his eyes. He slept heavily, but awoke early in +the morning with a slight feeling of feverishness. It was Sunday +morning. He thought of his study in the parsonage at Witton, with its +bright fire, its simplicity, its repose. He thought of the church, and +of the congregation which he would never face again. And Edith--what +had been her thoughts and dreams during the night? He got up, and went +to the window. It looked out upon a narrow, inclosed court. The sky was +dingy, the air was full of the muffled tumult of the city. His present +state, as to its merely external aspect, was certainly not so agreeable +as that of the morning before. Ay, but what a vista had opened now +which then was closed! David dressed himself, and went down to his +breakfast. While sitting at his table in the window, looking out upon +the market-place, and stirring his cup of Mocha, a gentleman came up +and accosted him. + +"Am I mistaken, or is your name Poindexter?" + +David looked up, and recognized Harwood Courtney, a son of Lord +Derwent. Courtney was a man of fashion, a member of the great clubs, +and a man, as they say, with a reputation. He was a good twenty years +older than David, and had been the companion of the latter's father in +some of his wildest escapades. To David, at this moment, he was the +representative and symbol of that great, splendid, unregenerate world, +with which it was his purpose to make acquaintance. + +"You are not mistaken, Mr. Courtney," he said, quietly. "Have you +breakfasted? It is some time since we have met." + +"Why, yes, egad! If I remember right, you were setting out on another +road than that which I was travelling. However, we sinners, you know, +depend upon you parsons to pull us up in time to prevent any--er--any +_very_ serious catastrophe! Ha! ha!" + +"I understand you; but for my part I have left the pulpit," said David, +uttering the irrevocable words with a carelessness which he himself +wondered at. + +"By Jove!" exclaimed Courtney, with a little intonation of surprise and +curiosity, which his good breeding prevented him from formulating more +explicitly. As David made no rejoinder, he presently continued: "Then-- +er--perhaps you might find it in your way to dine with me this evening. +Only one or two friends--a very quiet Sunday party." + +"Thank you," said David. "I had intended going to bed betimes to-night; +but it will give me pleasure to meet a quiet party." + +"Then that's settled," exclaimed Courtney; "and meanwhile, if you've +finished your coffee, what do you say to a turn in the Row? I've got my +trap here, and a breath of air will freshen us up." + +David and Courtney spent the day together, and by evening the young ex- +clergyman had made the acquaintance of many of the leading men about +town. He had also allowed the fact to transpire that his pecuniary +standing was of the soundest kind; but this was done so skillfully-- +with such a lofty air--that even Courtney, who was as cynical as any +man, was by no means convinced that David's change of fortune had +anything to do with his relinquishing the pulpit. + +"David Poindexter is no fool," he remarked, confidentially, to a +friend. "He has double the stuff in him that the old fellow had. You +must get up early to get the better of a man who has been a parson, and +seen through himself!" + +David, in fact, felt himself the superior, intellectually and by +nature, of most of the men he saw. He penetrated and comprehended them, +but to them he was impenetrable; a certain air of authority rested upon +him; he had abandoned the service of God; but the training whereby he +had fitted himself for it stood him in good stead; it had developed his +insight, his subtlety, and, strange to say, his powers of +dissimulation. Contrary to what is popularly supposed, his study of the +affairs of the other world had enabled him to deal with this world's +affairs with a half-contemptuous facility. As for the minor +technicalities, the social pass-words, and so forth, to which much +importance is generally ascribed, David had nothing to fear from them; +first, because he was a man of noble manners, naturally as well as by +cultivation; and, secondly, because the fact that he had been a +clergyman acted as a sort of breastplate against criticism. It would be +thought that he chose to appear ignorant of that which he really knew. + +As for Mr. Courtney's dinner, though it may doubtless have been a quiet +one from his point of view, it differed considerably from such Sunday +festivities as David had been accustomed to. A good deal of wine was +drunk, and the conversation (a little cautious at first, on David's +account) gradually thawed into freedom. It was late when they rose from +table; and then a proposition was made to go to a certain well-known +club in St. James's Street. David went with the rest, and, for the +first time in his life, played cards for money; he lost seven hundred +pounds--more money than he had handled during the last three years--but +he kept his head, and at three o'clock in the morning drove with +Courtney to the latter's lodgings, with five hundred pounds in his +pocket over and above the sum with which he had begun to play. Here was +a wonderful change in his existence; but it did not seem to him half so +wonderful as his reason told him it was. It seemed natural--as if, +after much wandering, he had at last found his way into the place where +he belonged. It is said that savages, educated from infancy amid +civilized surroundings, will, on breathing once more their native air, +tear off their clothes and become savages again. Somewhat similar may +have been David's case, who, inheriting in a vivid degree the manly +instincts of his forefathers, had forcibly and by constraint of +circumstances lived a life wholly opposed to these impulses--an +artificial life, therefore. But now at length he had come into his +birthright, and felt at home. + +One episode of the previous evening remained in his memory: it had +produced an effect upon him out of proportion with its apparent +significance. A gentleman, a guest at the dinner, a small man with +sandy hair and keen gray eyes, on being presented to David had looked +at him with an expression of shrewd perplexity, and said: + +"Have we not met before?" + +"It is possible, but I confess I do not recollect it," replied David. + +"The name was not Poindexter," continued the other, "but the face-- +pardon me--I could have taken my oath to." + +"Where did this meeting take place?" asked David, smiling. + +"In Paris, at ----'s," said the gray-eyed gentleman (mentioning the +name of a well-known French nobleman). + +"You are quite certain, of that?" + +"Yes. It was but a month since." + +"I was never in Paris. For three years I have hardly been out of sight +of London," David answered. "What was your friend's name?" + +"It has slipped my memory," he replied. "An Italian name, I fancy. But +he was a man--pardon me--of very striking appearance, and I conversed +with him for more than an hour." + +Now it is by no means an uncommon occurrence for two persons to bear a +close resemblance to each other, but (aside from the fact that David +was anything but an ordinary-looking man) this mistake of his new +acquaintance affected him oddly. He involuntarily associated it with +the internal and external transformation which had happened to him, and +said to himself: + +"This counterpart of mine was prophetic: he was what I am to be--what I +am." And fantastic though the notion was, he could not rid himself of +it. + +David returned to Witton about the middle of the week. In the interval +he had taken measures to make known to those concerned the revolution +of his affairs, and to have the old Lambert mansion opened, and put in +some sort of condition for his reception. He had gone forth on foot, an +unknown, poor, and humble clergyman; he returned driving behind a pair +of horses, by far the most important personage in the town; and yet +this outward change was far less great than the change within. His +reception could scarcely be called cordial; though not wanting in the +technical respect and ceremony due to him as a gentleman of wealth and +influence, he could perceive a half concealed suspense and misgiving, +due unmistakably to his attitude as a recreant clergyman. + +In fact, his worthy parishioners were in a terrible quandary how to +reconcile their desire to stand well with their richest fellow- +townsman, and their dismayed recognition of that townsman's scandalous +professional conduct. David smiled at this, but it made him bitter too. +He had intended once more to call the congregation together, and +frankly to explain to them the reasons, good or bad, which had induced +him to withdraw from active labor in the church. But now he determined +to preserve a proud and indifferent silence. There was only one person +who had a right to call him to account, and it was not without +fearfulness that he looked forward to his meeting with her. However, +the sooner such fears are put at rest the better, and he called upon +Edith on the evening of his arrival. Her father had been in bed for two +days with a cold, and she was sitting alone in the little parlor. + +She rose at his entrance with a deep blush, and a look of mixed +gladness and anxiety. Her eyes swiftly noted the change in his dress, +for he had considerably modified, though not as yet wholly laid aside, +the external marks of his profession. She held back from him with a +certain strangeness and timidity, so that lie did not kiss her cheek, +but only her hand. The first words of greeting were constrained and +conventional, but at last he said: + +"All is changed, Edith, except our love for each other." + +"I do not hold you to that," she answered, quickly. + +"But you can not turn me from it," he said, with a smile. + +"I do not know you yet," said she, looking away. + +"When I last saw you, you said you doubted whether I were my real self. +I have become my real self since then." + +"Because you are not what you were, it does not follow that you are +what you should be." + +"Surely, Edith, that is not reasonable. I was what circumstances forced +me to be, henceforth I shall be what God made me." + +"Did God, then, have no hand in those circumstances?" + +"Not more, at all events, than in these." + +Edith shook her head. "God does not absolve us from holy vows." + +"But how if I can not, with loyalty to my inner conscience, hold to +those vows?" exclaimed David, with more warmth. "I have long felt that +I was not fitted for this sacred calling. Before the secret tribunal of +my self-knowledge, I have stood charged with the sin of hypocrisy. It +has been God's will that I be delivered from that sin." + +"Why did you not say that before, David?" she demanded, looking at him. +"Why did you remain a hypocrite until it was for your worldly benefit +to abandon your trust? Can you say, on your word of honor, that you +would stand where you do now if you were still poor instead of rich?" + +"Men's eyes are to some extent opened and their views are confirmed by +events. They make our dreams and forebodings into realities. We +question in our minds, and events give us the answers." + +"Such an argument might excuse any villainy," said Edith, lifting her +head indignantly. + +"Villainy! Do you use that word to me?" exclaimed David. + +"Not unless your own heart bids me--and I do not know your heart." + +"Because you do not love me?" + +"You may be right," replied Edith, striving to steady her voice; "but +at least I believed I loved you." + +"You are cured of that belief, it seems--as I am cured of many foolish +faiths," said David, with gloomy bitterness. "Well, so be it! The love +that waits upon a fastidious conscience is never the deepest love. My +love is not of that complexion. Were it possible that the shadow of +sin, or of crime itself, could descend upon you, it would but render +you dearer to me than before." + +"You may break my heart, David, if you will," cried the girl, +tremulously, yet resolutely, "but I reverence love more than I love +you." + +David had turned away as if to leave the room, but he paused and +confronted her once more. + +"At any rate, we will understand each other," said he. "Do you make it +your condition that I should go back to the ministry?" + +Edith was still seated, but the condition of the crisis compelled her +to rise. She stood before him, her dark eyes downcast, her lips +trembling, nervously drawing the fingers of one hand through the clasp +of the other. She was tempted to yield to him, for she could imagine no +happiness in life without him; but a rare sanity and integrity of mind +made her perceive that he had pushed the matter to a false alternative. +It was not a question of preaching or not preaching sermons, but of +sinful apostasy from an upright life. At last she raised her eyes, +which shone like dark jewels in her pale countenance, and said, slowly, +"We had better part." + +"Then my sins be upon your head!" cried David, passionately. + +The blood mounted to her cheeks at the injustice of this rejoinder, but +she either could not or would not answer again. She remained erect and +proud until the door had closed between them; what she did after that +neither David nor any one else knew. + +The apostate David seems to have determined that, if she were to bear +the burden of his sins, they should be neither few nor light. His life +for many weeks after this interview was a scandal and a disgrace. The +old Lambert mansion was the scene of carousals and excesses such as +recalled the exploits of the monks of Medmenham. Harwood Courtney, and +a score of dissolute gentlemen like him, not to speak of other +visitors, thronged the old house day and night; drinking, gaming, and +yet wilder doings gave the sober little town no rest, till the Reverend +David Poindexter was commonly referred to as the Wicked Parson. +Meanwhile Edith Saltine bore herself with a grave, pale impassiveness, +which some admired, others wondered at, and others deemed an indication +that she had no heart. If she had not, so much the better for her; for +her father was almost as difficult to manage as David himself. The old +gentleman could neither comprehend nor forgive what seemed to him his +daughter's immeasurable perversity. One day she had been all for +marrying a poor, unknown preacher; and the next day, when to marry him +meant to be the foremost lady in the neighborhood, she dismissed him +without appeal. And the worst of it was that, much as the poor +colonel's mouth watered at the feasts and festivities of the Lambert +mansion, he was prevented by the fatality of his position from taking +any part in them. So Edith could find no peace either at home or +abroad; and if it dwelt not in her own heart, she was indeed forlorn. + +What may have been the cost of all this dissipation it was difficult to +say, but several observant persons were of opinion that the parson's +income could not long stand it. There were rumors that he had heavy +bills owing in several quarters, which he could pay only by realizing +some of his investments. On the other hand, it was said that he played +high and constantly, and usually had the devil's luck. But it is +impossible to gauge the truth of such stories, and the Wicked Parson +himself took no pains either to deny or confirm them. He was always the +loudest, the gayest, and the most reckless of his company, and the +leader and inspirer of all their wild proceedings; but it was noticed +that, though he laughed often, he never smiled; and that his face, when +in repose, bore traces of anything but happiness. For some cause or +other, moreover--but whether maliciously or remorsefully was open to +question--he never entirely laid aside his clerical garb; he seemed +either to delight in profaning it, or to retain it as the reminder and +scourge of his own wickedness. + +One night there was a great gathering up at the mansion, and the noise +and music were kept up till well past the small hours of the morning. +Gradually the guests departed, some going toward London, some +elsewhere. At last only Harwood Courtney remained, and he and David sat +down in the empty dining-room, disorderly with the remains of the +carousal, to play picquet. They played, with short intermissions, for +nearly twenty-four hours. At last David threw down his cards, and said, +quietly: + +"Well, that's all. Give me until to-morrow." + +"With all the pleasure in life, my boy," replied the other; "and your +revenge, too, if you like. Meanwhile, the best thing we can do is to +take a nap." + +"You may do so if you please," said David; "for my part, I must take a +turn on horseback first. I can never sleep till I have breathed fresh +air." + +They parted accordingly, Courtney going to his room, and David to the +stables, whence he presently issued, mounted on his bay mare, and rode +eastward. On his way he passed Colonel Saltine's house, and drew rein +for a moment beside it, looking up at Edith's window. It was between +four and five o'clock of a morning in early April; the sky was clear, +and all was still and peaceful. As he sat in the saddle looking up, the +blind of the window was raised and the sash itself opened, and Edith, +in her white night-dress, with her heavy brown hair falling round her +face and on her shoulders, gazed out. She regarded him with a half- +bewildered expression, as if doubting of his reality, For a moment they +remained thus; then he waved his hand to her with a wild gesture of +farewell, and rode on, passing immediately out of sight behind the dark +foliage of the cedar of Lebanon. + +On reaching the London high-road the horseman paused once more, and +seemed to hesitate what course to pursue; but finally he turned to the +right, and rode in a southerly direction. The road wound gently, and +dipped and rose to cross low hills; trees bordered the way on each +side; and as the sun rose they threw long shadows westward, while the +birds warbled and twittered in the fields and hedges. By-and-by a clump +of woodland came into view about half a mile off, the road passing +through the midst of it. As David entered it at one end, he saw, +advancing toward him through the shade and sunlight, a rider mounted on +a black horse. The latter seemed to be a very spirited animal, and as +David drew near it suddenly shied and reared so violently that any but +a practiced horseman would have been unseated. No catastrophe occurred, +however, and a moment afterward the two cavaliers were face to face. No +sooner had their eyes met than, as if by a common impulse, they both +drew rein, and set staring at each other with a curiosity which merged +into astonishment. At length the stranger on the black horse gave a +short laugh, and said: + +"I perceive that the same strange thing has struck us both, sir. If you +won't consider it uncivil, I should like to know who you are. My name +is Giovanni Lambert." + +"Giovanni Lambert," repeated David, with a slight involuntary movement; +"unless I am mistaken, I have heard mention of you. But you are not +Italian?" + +"Only on my mother's side. But you have the advantage of me." + +"You will understand that I could not have heard of you without feeling +a strong desire to meet you," said David, dismounting as he spoke. "It +is, I think, the only desire left me in the world. I had marked this +wood, as I came along, as an inviting place to rest in. Would it suit +you to spend an hour here, where we can converse better at our ease +than in saddle; or does time press you? As for me, I have little more +to do with time." + +"I am at your service, sir, with pleasure," returned the other, leaping +lightly to the ground, and revealing by the movement a pair of small +pistols attached to the belt beneath his blue riding surtout. "It was +in my mind, also, to stretch my legs and take a pull at my pipe, for, +early as it is, I have ridden far this morning." + +At the point where they had halted a green lane branched off into the +depths of the wood, and down this they passed, leading their horses. +When they were out of sight of the road they made their animals fast in +such a way that they could crop the grass, and themselves reclined at +the foot of a broad-limbed oak, and they remained in converse there for +upward of an hour. + +In fact, it must been several hours later (for the sun was high in the +heavens) when one of them issued from the wood. He was mounted on a +black horse, and wore a blue surtout and high boots. After looking up +and down the road, and assuring himself that no one was in sight, he +turned his horse's head toward London, and set off at a round canter. +Coming to a cross-road, he turned to the right, and rode for an hour in +that direction, crossing the Thames near Hampton Wick. In the afternoon +he entered London from the south, and put up at an obscure hostelry. +Having seen his horse attended to, and eaten something himself, he went +to bed and slept soundly for eighteen hours. On awaking, he ate +heartily again, and spent the rest of the day in writing and arranging +a quantity of documents that were packed in his saddle-bags. The next +morning early he paid his reckoning, rode across London Bridge, and +shaped his course toward the west. + +Meanwhile the town of Witton was in vast perturbation. When Mr. Harwood +Courtney woke up late in the afternoon, and came yawning down-stairs to +get his breakfast, he learned, in answer to his inquiries, that nothing +had been seen of David Poindexter since he rode away thirteen hours +ago. Mr. Courtney expressed anxiety at this news, and dispatched his +own valet and one of David's grooms to make investigations in the +neighborhood. These two personages investigated to such good purpose +that before night the whole neighborhood was aware that David +Poindexter had disappeared. By the next morning it became evident that +something had happened to the Wicked Parson, and some people ventured +to opine that the thing which had happened to him was that he had run +away. And indeed it was astonishing to find to how many worthy people +this evil-minded parson was in debt. Every other man you met had a bill +against the Reverend David Poindexter in his pocket; and as the day +wore on, and still no tidings of the missing man were received, +individuals of the sheriff and bailiff species began to be +distinguishable amid the crowd. But the great sensation was yet to +come. How the report started no one knew, but toward supper-time it +passed from mouth to mouth that Mr. Harwood Courtney, in the course of +his twenty-four hours of picquet with Poindexter, had won from the +latter not his ready money alone, but the entire property and estates +that had accrued to him as nearest of kin to the late David Lambert. +And it was added that, as the debt was a gambling transaction, and +therefore not technically recoverable by process of law, Mr. Courtney +was naturally very anxious for his debtor to put in an appearance. Now +it so happened that this report, unlike many others ostensibly more +plausible, was true in every particular. + +Probably there was more gossip at the supper-tables of Witton that +night than in any other town of ten times the size in the United +Kingdom; and it was formally agreed that Poindexter had escaped to the +Continent, and would either remain in hiding there, or take passage by +the first opportunity to the American colonies, or the United States, +as they had now been called for some years past. Nobody defended the +reverend apostate, but, on the other hand, nobody pretended to be sorry +for Mr. Harwood Courtney; it was generally agreed that they had both of +them got what they deserved. The only question was, What was to become +of the property? Some people said it ought to belong to Edith Saltine; +but of course poetical justice of that kind was not to be expected. + +Edith, meanwhile, had kept herself strictly secluded. She was the last +person who had seen David Poindexter, but she had mentioned the fact to +no one. She was also the only person who did not believe that he had +escaped, but who felt convinced that he was dead, and that he had died +by his own hand. That gesture of farewell and of despair which he had +made to her as he vanished behind the cedar of Lebanon had for her a +significance capable of only one interpretation. Were he alive, he +would have returned. + +On the evening of the day following the events just recorded, the +solitude of her room suddenly became terrible to Edith, and she was +irresistibly impelled to dress herself and go forth in the open air. +She wound a veil about her head, and, avoiding the main thoroughfare, +slipped out of the town unperceived, and gained the free country. After +a while she found herself approaching a large tree, which spread its +branches across a narrow lane that made a short-cut to the London +highway. Beneath the tree was a natural seat, formed of a fragment of +stone, and here David and she had often met and sat. It was a mild, +still evening; she sat down on the stone, and removed her veil. The +moon, then in its first quarter, was low in the west, and shone beneath +the branches of the tree. + +Presently she was aware--though not by any sound--that some one was +approaching, and she drew back in the shadow of the tree. Down the lane +came a horseman, mounted on a tall, black horse. The outline of his +figure and the manner in which he rode fixed Edith's gaze as if by a +spell, and made the blood hum in her ears. Nearer he came, and now his +face was discernible in the level moonlight. It was impossible to +mistake that countenance: the horseman was David Poindexter. His +costume, however, was different from any he had ever before worn; there +was nothing clerical about it; nor was that black horse from the +Poindexter stables. Then, too, how noiselessly he rode!--as noiselessly +as a ghost. That, however, must have been because his horse's hoofs +fell on the soft turf. He rode slowly, and his head was bent as if in +thought; but almost before Edith could draw her breath, much less to +speak, he had passed beneath the boughs of the tree, and was riding on +toward the village. Now he had vanished in the vague light and shadow, +and a moment later Edith began to doubt whether her senses had not +played her a trick. A superstitious horror fell upon her; what she had +seen was a spirit, not living flesh and blood. She knelt down by the +stone, and remained for a long time with her face hidden upon her arms, +and her hands clasped, sometimes praying, sometimes wondering and +fearing. At last she rose to her feet, and hastened homeward through +the increasing darkness. But before she had reached her house she had +discovered that what she had seen was no ghost. The whole village was +in a fever of excitement. + +Everybody was full of the story. An hour ago who should appear riding +quietly up the village street but David Poindexter himself--at least, +if it were not he, it was the devil. He seemed to take little notice of +the astonished glances that were thrown at him, or, at any rate, not to +understand them. Instead of going to the Lambert mansion, he had +alighted at the inn, and asked the innkeeper whether he might have +lodging there. But when the innkeeper, who had known the reverend +gentleman as well as he knew his own sign-board, had addressed him by +name, the other had shaken his head, seemed perplexed, and had affirmed +that his name was not Poindexter but Lambert; and had added, upon +further inquiry, that he was the only son of David Lambert, and was +come to claim that gentleman's property, to which he was by law +entitled; in proof whereof he had produced various documents, among +them the certificates of his mother's marriage and of his own birth. As +to David Poindexter, he declared that he knew not there was such a +person; and although no man in his senses could be made to believe that +David Poindexter and this so-called Lambert were twain, and not one and +the same individual, the latter stoutly maintained his story, and vowed +that the truth would sooner or later appear and confirm him. Meanwhile, +however, one of his creditors had had him arrested for a debt of eight +hundred pounds; and Harwood Courtney had seen him, and said that he was +ready to pledge his salvation that the man was Poindexter and nobody +else. So here the matter rested for the present. But who ever heard of +so strange and audacious an attempt at imposition? The man had not even +made any effort to disguise himself further than to put on a different +suit of clothes and get another horse; and why, in the name of all that +was inconceivable, had he come back to Witton, instead of going to any +other part of the earth's surface What could he expect here, except +immediate detection, imprisonment, and ruin? Was he insane? He did not +seem to be so; but that interpretation of his conduct was not only the +most charitable one, but no other could be imagined that would account +for the facts. + +Witton slept but little that night; but who shall describe its +bewilderment when, early in the morning, a constable arrived in the +village with the news that the dead body of the Reverend David +Poindexter had been found in some woods about fifteen miles off, and +that his bay mare had been picked up grazing along the roadside not far +from home! Upon the heels of this intelligence came the corpse itself, +lying in a country wagon, and the bay mare trotting behind. It was +taken out and placed on the table in the inn parlor, where it +immediately became the center of a crowd half crazy with curiosity and +amazement. The cause of death was found to be the breaking of the +vertebral column just at the base of the neck. There was no other +injury on the body, and, allowing for the natural changes incident to +death, the face was in every particular the face of David Poindexter. +The man who called himself Lambert was now brought into the room, and +made to stand beside the corpse, which he regarded with a certain calm +interest. The resemblance between the two was minute and astonishing; +it was found to be impossible, upon that evidence alone, to decide +which was David Poindexter. + +The matter was brought to trial as promptly as possible. A great number +of witnesses identified the prisoner as David Poindexter, but those who +had seen the corpse mostly gave their evidence an opposite inclination; +and four persons (one of them the gray-eyed gentleman who has been +already mentioned) swore positively that the prisoner was Giovanni +Lambert, the gray-eyed gentleman adding that he had once met +Poindexter, and had confidently taken him to be Lambert. + +An attempt was then made to prove that Lambert had murdered Poindexter; +but it entirely failed, there being no evidence that the two men had +ever so much as met, and there being no conceivable motive for the +murder. Lambert, therefore, was permitted to enter undisturbed upon his +inheritance; for he had no difficulty in establishing the fact of the +elder Lambert's marriage to an Italian woman twenty-three years before. +The marriage had been a secret one, and soon after a violent quarrel +had taken place between the wife and husband, and they had separated. +The following month Giovanni was born prematurely. He had seen his +father but once. The quarrel was never made up, but Lambert sent his +wife, from time to time, money enough for her support. She had died +about ten years ago, and had given her son the papers to establish his +identity, telling him that the day would come to use them. Giovanni had +been a soldier, fighting against the French in Spain and elsewhere, and +had only heard of his father's death a few weeks ago. He had thereupon +come to claim his own, with the singular results that we have seen. + +Here was the end of the case, so far as the law was concerned; but the +real end of it is worth noting. Lambert, by his own voluntary act, paid +all the legal debts contracted by Poindexter, and gave Courtney, in +settlement of the gambling transaction, a sum of fifty thousand pounds. +The remainder of his fortune, which was still considerable, he devoted +almost entirely to charitable purposes, doing so much genuine good, in +a manner so hearty and unassuming, that he became the object of more +personal affection than falls to the lot of most philanthropists. He +was of a quiet, sad, and retiring disposition, and uniformly very +sparing of words. After a year or so, circumstances brought it about +that he and Miss Saltine were associated in some benevolent enterprise, +and from that time forward they often consulted together in such +matters, Lambert making her the medium of many of his benefactions. Of +course the gossips were ready to predict that it would end with a +marriage; and indeed it was impossible to see the two together (though +both of them, and especially Edith, had altered somewhat with the +passage of years) without being reminded of the former love affair in +which Lambert's double had been the hero. Did this also occur to Edith? +It could hardly have been otherwise, and it would be interesting to +speculate on her feelings in the matter; but I have only the story to +tell. At all events, they never did marry, though they became very +tender friends. At the end of seven years Colonel Saltine died of +jaundice; he had been failing in his mind for some time previous, and +had always addressed Lambert as Poindexter, and spoken of him as his +son-in-law. The year following Lambert himself died, after a brief +illness. He left all his property to Edith. She survived to her +seventieth year, making it the business of her life to carry out his +philanthropic schemes, and she always dressed in widows' weeds. After +her death, the following passage was found in one of her private +journals. It refers to her last interview with Lambert, on his death- +bed: + +".... He smiled, and said, 'You will believe, now, that I was sincere +in renouncing the ministry, though I have tried to serve the Lord in +other ways than from the pulpit.' I felt a shock in my heart, and could +hardly say, 'What do you mean, Mr. Lambert?' He replied, 'Surely, +Edith, your soul knows, if your reason does not, that I am David +Poindexter!' I could not speak. I hid my face in my hands. After a +while, in separate sentences, he told me the truth. When he rode forth +on that dreadful morning it was with the purpose to die. But he met on +the road this Giovanni Lambert, who so marvelously resembled him, and +they sat down together in the wood and talked, and Giovanni told him +all the story of his life.... As Giovanni was about to mount his horse, +which was very restive, he saw a violet in the grass, and stooped to +pick it. The horse lashed out with its heels, and struck him in the +back of the neck and killed him.... Then the idea came to David to +exchange clothes with the dead man, and to take his papers, and +personate him. Thus, he could escape from the individuality which was +his curse, and find his true self, as it were, in another person. He +said, too, that his greatest hope had been to win my love and make me +his wife; but he found that he could not bring himself to attempt that, +unless he confessed his falsehood to me, and he had feared that this +confession would turn me from him forever. I wept, and told him that my +heart had been his almost from the first, because I always thought of +him as David, and that I would have loved him through all things. He +said, 'Then God has been more merciful to me than I deserve; but, +doubtless, it is also of His mercy that we have remained unmarried.' +But I was in an agony, and could not yet be reconciled. At last he +said, 'Will you kiss me, Edith?' and afterward he said, 'My wife!' and +that was his last word. But we shall meet again!" + + + + +KEN'S MYSTERY. + + +One cool October evening--it was the last day of the month, and +unusually cool for the time of year--I made up my mind to go and spend +an hour or two with my friend Keningale. Keningale was an artist (as +well as a musical amateur and poet), and had a very delightful studio +built onto his house, in which he was wont to sit of an evening. The +studio had a cavernous fire-place, designed in imitation of the old- +fashioned fire-places of Elizabethan manor-houses, and in it, when the +temperature out-doors warranted, he would build up a cheerful fire of +dry logs. It would suit me particularly well, I thought, to go and have +a quiet pipe and chat in front of that fire with my friend. + +I had not had such a chat for a very long time--not, in fact, since +Keningale (or Ken, as his friends called him) had returned from his +visit to Europe the year before. He went abroad, as he affirmed at the +time, "for purposes of study," whereat we all smiled, for Ken, so far +as we knew him, was more likely to do anything else than to study. He +was a young fellow of buoyant temperament, lively and social in his +habits, of a brilliant and versatile mind, and possessing an income of +twelve or fifteen thousand dollars a year; he could sing, play, +scribble, and paint very cleverly, and some of his heads and figure- +pieces were really well done, considering that he never had any regular +training in art; but he was not a worker. Personally he was fine- +looking, of good height and figure, active, healthy, and with a +remarkably fine brow, and clear, full-gazing eye. Nobody was surprised +at his going to Europe, nobody expected him to do anything there except +amuse himself, and few anticipated that he would be soon again seen in +New York. He was one of the sort that find Europe agree with them. Off +he went, therefore; and in the course of a few months the rumor reached +us that he was engaged to a handsome and wealthy New York girl whom he +had met in London. This was nearly all we did hear of him until, not +very long afterward, he turned up again on Fifth Avenue, to every one's +astonishment; made no satisfactory answer to those who wanted to know +how he happened to tire so soon of the Old World; while, as to the +reported engagement, he cut short all allusion to that in so peremptory +a manner as to show that it was not a permissible topic of conversation +with him. It was surmised that the lady had jilted him; but, on the +other hand, she herself returned home not a great while after, and, +though she had plenty of opportunities, she has never married to this +day. + +Be the rights of that matter what they may, it was soon remarked that +Ken was no longer the careless and merry fellow he used to be; on the +contrary, he appeared grave, moody, averse from general society, and +habitually taciturn and undemonstrative even in the company of his most +intimate friends. Evidently something had happened to him, or he had +done something. What? Had he committed a murder? or joined the +Nihilists? or was his unsuccessful love affair at the bottom of it? +Some declared that the cloud was only temporary, and would soon pass +away. Nevertheless, up to the period of which I am writing, it had not +passed away, but had rather gathered additional gloom, and threatened +to become permanent. + +Meanwhile I had met him twice or thrice at the club, at the opera, or +in the street, but had as yet had no opportunity of regularly renewing +my acquaintance with him. We had been on a footing of more than common +intimacy in the old days, and I was not disposed to think that he would +refuse to renew the former relations now. But what I had heard and +myself seen of his changed condition imparted a stimulating tinge of +suspense or curiosity to the pleasure with which I looked forward to +the prospects of this evening. His house stood at a distance of two or +three miles beyond the general range of habitations in New York at this +time, and as I walked briskly along in the clear twilight air I had +leisure to go over in my mind all that I had known of Ken and had +divined of his character. After all, had there not always been +something in his nature--deep down, and held in abeyance by the +activity of his animal spirits--but something strange and separate, and +capable of developing under suitable conditions into--into what? As I +asked myself this question I arrived at his door; and it was with a +feeling of relief that I felt the next moment the cordial grasp of his +hand, and his voice bidding me welcome in a tone that indicated +unaffected gratification at my presence. He drew me at once into the +studio, relieved me of my hat and cane, and then put his hand on my +shoulder. + +"I am glad to see you," he repeated, with singular earnestness--"glad +to see you and to feel you; and to-night of all nights in the year." + +"Why to-night especially?" + +"Oh, never mind. It's just as well, too, you didn't let me know +beforehand you were coming; the unreadiness is all, to paraphrase the +poet. Now, with you to help me, I can drink a glass of whisky and water +and take a bit draw of the pipe. This would have been a grim night for +me if I'd been left to myself." + +"In such a lap of luxury as this, too!" said I, looking round at the +glowing fire-place, the low, luxurious chairs, and all the rich and +sumptuous fittings of the room. "I should have thought a condemned +murderer might make himself comfortable here." + +"Perhaps; but that's not exactly my category at present. But have you +forgotten what night this is? This is November-eve, when, as tradition +asserts, the dead arise and walk about, and fairies, goblins, and +spiritual beings of all kinds have more freedom and power than on any +other day of the year. One can see you've never been in Ireland." + +"I wasn't aware till now that you had been there, either." + +"Yes, I have been in Ireland. Yes--" He paused, sighed, and fell into a +reverie, from which, however, he soon roused himself by an effort, and +went to a cabinet in a corner of the room for the liquor and tobacco. +While he was thus employed I sauntered about the studio, taking note of +the various beauties, grotesquenesses, and curiosities that it +contained. Many things were there to repay study and arouse admiration; +for Ken was a good collector, having excellent taste as well as means +to back it. But, upon the whole, nothing interested me more than some +studies of a female head, roughly done in oils, and, judging from the +sequestered positions in which I found them, not intended by the artist +for exhibition or criticism. There were three or four of these studies, +all of the same face, but in different poses and costumes. In one the +head was enveloped in a dark hood, overshadowing and partly concealing +the features; in another she seemed to be peering duskily through a +latticed casement, lit by a faint moonlight; a third showed her +splendidly attired in evening costume, with jewels in her hair and +cars, and sparkling on her snowy bosom. The expressions were as various +as the poses; now it was demure penetration, now a subtle inviting +glance, now burning passion, and again a look of elfish and elusive +mockery. In whatever phase, the countenance possessed a singular and +poignant fascination, not of beauty merely, though that was very +striking, but of character and quality likewise. + +"Did you find this model abroad?" I inquired at length. "She has +evidently inspired yon, and I don't wonder at it." + +Ken, who had been mixing the punch, and had not noticed my movements, +now looked up, and said: "I didn't mean those to be seen. They don't +satisfy me, and I am going to destroy them; but I couldn't rest till +I'd made some attempts to reproduce--What was it you asked? Abroad? +Yes--or no. They were all painted here within the last six weeks." + +'"Whether they satisfy you or not, they are by far the best things of +yours I have ever seen." + +'"Well, let them alone, and tell me what you think of this beverage. To +my thinking, it goes to the right spot. It owes its existence to your +coming here. I can't drink alone, and those portraits are not company, +though, for aught I know, she might have come out of the canvas to- +night and sat down in that chair." Then, seeing my inquiring look, he +added, with a hasty laugh, "It's November-eve, you know, when anything +may happen, provided its strange enough. Well, here's to ourselves." + +We each swallowed a deep draught of the smoking and aromatic liquor, +and set down our glasses with approval. The punch was excellent. Ken +now opened a box of cigars, and we seated ourselves before the fire- +place. + +"All we need now," I remarked, after a short silence, "is a little +music. By-the-by, Ken, have you still got the banjo I gave you before +you went abroad?" + +He paused so long before replying that I supposed he had not heard my +question. "I have got it," he said, at length, "but it will never make +any more music." + +"Got broken, eh? Can't it be mended? It was a fine instrument." + +"It's not broken, but it's past mending. You shall see for yourself." + +He arose as he spoke, and going to another part of the studio, opened a +black oak coffer, and took out of it a long object wrapped up in a +piece of faded yellow silk. He handed it to me, and when I had +unwrapped it, there appeared a thing that might once have been a banjo, +but had little resemblance to one now. It bore every sign of extreme +age. The wood of the handle was honeycombed with the gnawings of worms, +and dusty with dry-rot. The parchment head was green with mold, and +hung in shriveled tatters. The hoop, which was of solid silver, was so +blackened and tarnished that it looked like dilapidated iron. The +strings were gone, and most of the tuning-screws had dropped out of +their decayed sockets. Altogether it had the appearance of having been +made before the Flood, and been forgotten in the forecastle of Noah's +Ark ever since. + +"It is a curious relic, certainly," I said. "Where did you come across +it? I had no idea that the banjo was invented so long ago as this. It +certainly can't be less than two hundred years old, and may be much +older than that." + +Ken smiled gloomily. "You are quite right," lie said; "it is at least +two hundred years old, and yet it is the very same banjo that you gave +me a year ago." + +"Hardly," I returned, smiling in my turn, "since that was made to my +order with a view to presenting it to you." + +"I know that; but the two hundred years have passed since then. Yes; it +is absurd and impossible, I know, but nothing is truer. That banjo, +which was made last year, existed in the sixteenth century, and has +been rotting ever since. Stay. Give it to me a moment, and I'll +convince you. You recollect that your name and mine, with the date, +were engraved on the silver hoop?" + +"Yes; and there was a private mark of my own there, also." + +"Very well," said Ken, who had been rubbing a place on the hoop with a +corner of the yellow silk wrapper; "look at that." + +I took the decrepit instrument from him, and examined the spot which he +had rubbed. It was incredible, sure enough; but there were the names +and the date precisely as I had caused them to be engraved; and there, +moreover, was my own private mark, which I had idly made with an old +etching point not more than eighteen months before. After convincing +myself that there was no mistake, I laid the banjo across my knees, and +stared at my friend in bewilderment. He sat smoking with a kind of grim +composure, his eyes fixed upon the blazing logs. + +"I'm mystified, I confess," said I. "Come; what is the joke? What +method have you discovered of producing the decay of centuries on this +unfortunate banjo in a few months? And why did you do it? I have heard +of an elixir to counteract the effects of time, but your recipe seems +to work the other way--to make time rush forward at two hundred times +his usual rate, in one place, while he jogs on at his usual gait +elsewhere. Unfold your mystery, magician. Seriously, Ken, how on earth +did the thing happen?" + +"I know no more about it than you do," was his reply. "Either you and I +and all the rest of the living world are insane, or else there has been +wrought a miracle as strange as any in tradition. How can I explain it? +It is a common saying--a common experience, if you will--that we may, +on certain trying or tremendous occasions, live years in one moment. +But that's a mental experience, not a physical one, and one that +applies, at all events, only to human beings, not to senseless things +of wood and metal. You imagine the thing is some trick or jugglery. If +it be, I don't know the secret of it. There's no chemical appliance +that I ever heard of that will get a piece of solid wood into that +condition in a few months, or a few years. And it wasn't done in a few +years, or a few months either. A year ago today at this very hour that +banjo was as sound as when it left the maker's hands, and twenty-four +hours afterward--I'm telling you the simple truth--it was as you see it +now." + +The gravity and earnestness with which Ken made this astounding +statement were evidently not assumed, He believed every word that he +uttered. I knew not what to think. Of course my friend might be insane, +though he betrayed none of the ordinary symptoms of mania; but, however +that might be, there was the banjo, a witness whose silent testimony +there was no gainsaying. The more I meditated on the matter the more +inconceivable did it appear. Two hundred years--twenty-four hours; +these were the terms of the proposed equation. Ken and the banjo both +affirmed that the equation had been made; all worldly knowledge and +experience affirmed it to be impossible. "What was the explanation? +What is time? What is life? I felt myself beginning to doubt the +reality of all things. And so this was the mystery which my friend had +been brooding over since his return from abroad. No wonder it had +changed him. More to be wondered at was it that it had not changed him +more. + +"Can you tell me the whole story?" I demanded at length. + +Ken quaffed another draught from his glass of whisky and water and +rubbed his hand through his thick brown beard. "I have never spoken to +any one of it heretofore," he said, "and I had never meant to speak of +it. But I'll try and give you some idea of what it was. You know me +better than any one else; you'll understand the thing as far as it can +ever be understood, and perhaps I may be relieved of some of the +oppression it has caused me. For it is rather a ghastly memory to +grapple with alone, I can tell you." + +Hereupon, without further preface, Ken related the following tale. He +was, I may observe in passing, a naturally fine narrator. There were +deep, lingering tones in his voice, and he could strikingly enhance the +comic or pathetic effect of a sentence by dwelling here and there upon +some syllable. His features were equally susceptible of humorous and of +solemn expressions, and his eyes were in form and hue wonderfully +adapted to showing great varieties of emotion. Their mournful aspect +was extremely earnest and affecting; and when Ken was giving utterance +to some mysterious passage of the tale they had a doubtful, melancholy, +exploring look which appealed irresistibly to the imagination. But the +interest of his story was too pressing to allow of noticing these +incidental embellishments at the time, though they doubtless had their +influence upon me all the same. + +"I left New York on an Inman Line steamer, you remember," began Ken, +"and landed at Havre. I went the usual round of sight-seeing on the +Continent, and got round to London in July, at the height of the +season. I had good introductions, and met any number of agreeable and +famous people. Among others was a young lady, a countrywoman of my own +--you know whom I mean--who interested me very much, and before her +family left London she and I were engaged. We parted there for the +time, because she had the Continental trip still to make, while I +wanted to take the opportunity to visit the north of England and +Ireland. I landed at Dublin about the 1st of October, and, zigzagging +about the country, I found myself in County Cork about two weeks later. + +"There is in that region some of the most lovely scenery that human +eyes ever rested on, and it seems to be less known to tourists than +many places of infinitely less picturesque value. A lonely region too: +during my rambles I met not a single stranger like myself, and few +enough natives. It seems incredible that so beautiful a country should +be so deserted. After walking a dozen Irish miles you come across a +group of two or three one-roomed cottages, and, like as not, one or +more of those will have the roof off and the walls in ruins. The few +peasants whom one sees, however, are affable and hospitable, especially +when they hear you are from that terrestrial heaven whither most of +their friends and relatives have gone before them. They seem simple and +primitive enough at first sight, and yet they are as strange and +incomprehensible a race as any in the world. They are as superstitious, +as credulous of marvels, fairies, magicians, and omens, as the men whom +St. Patrick preached to, and at the same time they are shrewd, +skeptical, sensible, and bottomless liars. Upon the whole, I met with +no nation on my travels whose company I enjoyed so much, or who +inspired me with so much kindliness, curiosity, and repugnance. + +"At length I got to a place on the sea-coast, which I will not further +specify than to say that it is not many miles from Ballymacheen, on the +south shore. I have seen Venice and Naples, I have driven along the +Cornice Road, I have spent a month at our own Mount Desert, and I say +that all of them together are not so beautiful as this glowing, deep- +hued, soft-gleaming, silvery-lighted, ancient harbor and town, with the +tall hills crowding round it and the black cliffs and headlands +planting their iron feet in the blue, transparent sea. It is a very old +place, and has had a history which it has outlived ages since. It may +once have had two or three thousand inhabitants; it has scarce five or +six hundred to day. Half the houses are in ruins or have disappeared; +many of the remainder are standing empty. All the people are poor, most +of them abjectly so; they saunter about with bare feet and uncovered +heads, the women in quaint black or dark-blue cloaks, the men in such +anomalous attire as only an Irishman knows how to get together, the +children half naked. The only comfortable-looking people are the monks +and the priests, and the soldiers in the fort. For there is a fort +there, constructed on the huge ruins of one which may have done duty in +the reign of Edward the Black Prince, or earlier, in whose mossy +embrasures are mounted a couple of cannon, which occasionally sent a +practice-shot or two at the cliff on the other side of the harbor. The +garrison consists of a dozen men and three or four officers and non- +commissioned officers. I suppose they are relieved occasionally, but +those I saw seemed to have become component parts of their +surroundings. + +"I put up at a wonderful little old inn, the only one in the place, and +took my meals in a dining-saloon fifteen feet by nine, with a portrait +of George I (a print varnished to preserve it) hanging over the mantel- +piece. On the second evening after dinner a young gentleman came in-- +the dining-saloon being public property of course--and ordered some +bread and cheese and a bottle of Dublin stout. We presently fell into +talk; he turned out to be an officer from the fort, Lieutenant +O'Connor, and a fine young specimen of the Irish soldier he was. After +telling me all he knew about the town, the surrounding country, his +friends, and himself, he intimated a readiness to sympathize with +whatever tale I might choose to pour into his ear; and I had pleasure +in trying to rival his own outspokenness. We became excellent friends; +we had up a half-pint of Kinahan's whisky, and the lieutenant expressed +himself in terms of high praise of my countrymen, my country, and my +own particular cigars. When it became time for him to depart I +accompanied him--for there was a splendid moon abroad--and bade him +farewell at the fort entrance, having promised to come over the next +day and make the acquaintance of the other fellows. 'And mind your eye, +now, going back, my dear boy,' he called out, as I turned my face +homeward. 'Faith, 'tis a spooky place, that graveyard, and you'll as +likely meet the black woman there as anywhere else!' + +"The graveyard was a forlorn and barren spot on the hill-side, just the +hither side of the fort: thirty or forty rough head-stones, few of +which retained any semblance of the perpendicular, while many were so +shattered and decayed as to seem nothing more than irregular natural +projections from the ground. Who the black woman might be I knew not, +and did not stay to inquire. I had never been subject to ghostly +apprehensions, and as a matter of fact, though the path I had to follow +was in places very bad going, not to mention a hap-hazard scramble over +a ruined bridge that covered a deep-lying brook, I reached my inn +without any adventure whatever. + +"The next day I kept my appointment at the fort, and found no reason to +regret it; and my friendly sentiments were abundantly reciprocated, +thanks more especially, perhaps, to the success of my banjo, which I +carried with me, and which was as novel as it was popular with those +who listened to it. The chief personages in the social circle besides +my friend the lieutenant were Major Molloy, who was in command, a racy +and juicy old campaigner, with a face like a sunset, and the surgeon, +Dr. Dudeen, a long, dry, humorous genius, with a wealth of anecdotical +and traditional lore at his command that I have never seen surpassed. +We had a jolly time of it, and it was the precursor of many more like +it. The remains of October slipped away rapidly, and I was obliged to +remember that I was a traveler in Europe, and not a resident in +Ireland. The major, the surgeon, and the lieutenant all protested +cordially against my proposed departure, but, as there was no help for +it, they arranged a farewell dinner to take place in the fort on All- +halloween. + +"I wish you could have been at that dinner with me! It was the essence +of Irish good-fellowship. Dr. Dudeen was in great force; the major was +better than the best of Lever's novels; the lieutenant was overflowing +with hearty good-humor, merry chaff, and sentimental rhapsodies anent +this or the other pretty girl of the neighborhood. For my part I made +the banjo ring as it had never rung before, and the others joined in +the chorus with a mellow strength of lungs such as you don't often hear +outside of Ireland. Among the stories that Dr. Dudeen regaled us with +was one about the Kern of Querin and his wife, Ethelind Fionguala-- +which being interpreted signifies 'the white-shouldered.' The lady, it +appears, was originally betrothed to one O'Connor (here the lieutenant +smacked his lips), but was stolen away on the wedding night by a party +of vampires, who, it would seem, were at that period a prominent +feature among the troubles of Ireland. But as they were bearing her +along--she being unconscious--to that supper where she was not to eat +but to be eaten, the young Kern of Querin, who happened to be out duck- +shooting, met the party, and emptied his gun at it. The vampires fled, +and the Kern carried the fair lady, still in a state of insensibility, +to his house. 'And by the same token, Mr. Keningale,' observed the +doctor, knocking the ashes out of his pipe, 'ye're after passing that +very house on your way here. The one with the dark archway underneath +it, and the big mullioned window at the corner, ye recollect, hanging +over the street as I might say--' + +"'Go 'long wid the house, Dr. Dudeen, dear,' interrupted the +lieutenant; 'sure can't you see we're all dying to know what happened +to sweet Miss Fionguala, God be good to her, when I was after getting +her safe up-stairs--' + +"'Faith, then, I can tell ye that myself, Mr. O'Connor,' exclaimed the +major, imparting a rotary motion to the remnants of whisky in his +tumbler. ''Tis a question to be solved on general principles, as +Colonel O'Halloran said that time he was asked what he'd do if he'd +been the Book o' Wellington, and the Prussians hadn't come up in the +nick o' time at Waterloo. 'Faith,' says the colonel, 'I'll tell ye--' + +"'Arrah, then, major, why would ye be interruptin' the doctor, and Mr. +Keningale there lettin' his glass stay empty till he hears--The Lord +save us! the bottle's empty!' + +"In the excitement consequent upon this discovery, the thread of the +doctor's story was lost; and before it could be recovered the evening +had advanced so far that I felt obliged to withdraw. It took some time +to make my proposition heard and comprehended; and a still longer time +to put it in execution; so that it was fully midnight before I found +myself standing in the cool pure air outside the fort, with the +farewells of my boon companions ringing in my ears. + +"Considering that it had been rather a wet evening in-doors, I was in a +remarkably good state of preservation, and I therefore ascribed it +rather to the roughness of the road than to the smoothness of the +liquor, when, after advancing a few rods, I stumbled and fell. As I +picked myself up I fancied I had heard a laugh, and supposed that the +lieutenant, who had accompanied me to the gate, was making merry over +my mishap; but on looking round I saw that the gate was closed and no +one was visible. The laugh, moreover, had seemed to be close at hand, +and to be even pitched in a key that was rather feminine than +masculine. Of course I must have been deceived; nobody was near me: my +imagination had played me a trick, or else there was more truth than +poetry in the tradition that Halloween is the carnival-time of +disembodied spirits. It did not occur to me at the time that a stumble +is held by the superstitious Irish to be an evil omen, and had I +remembered it it would only have been to laugh at it. At all events, I +was physically none the worse for my fall, and I resumed my way +immediately. + +"But the path was singularly difficult to find, or rather the path I +was following did not seem to be the right one. I did not recognize it; +I could have sworn (except I knew the contrary) that I had never seen +it before. The moon had risen, though her light was as yet obscured by +clouds, but neither my immediate surroundings nor the general aspect of +the region appeared familiar. Dark, silent hill-sides mounted up on +either hand, and the road, for the most part, plunged downward, as if +to conduct me into the bowels of the earth. The place was alive with +strange echoes, so that at times I seemed to be walking through the +midst of muttering voices and mysterious whispers, and a wild, faint +sound of laughter seemed ever and anon to reverberate among the passes +of the hills. Currents of colder air sighing up through narrow defiles +and dark crevices touched my face as with airy fingers. A certain +feeling of anxiety and insecurity began to take possession of me, +though there was no definable cause for it, unless that I might be +belated in getting home. With the perverse instinct of those who are +lost I hastened my steps, but was impelled now and then to glance back +over my shoulder, with a sensation of being pursued. But no living +creature was in sight. The moon, however, had now risen higher, and the +clouds that were drifting slowly across the sky flung into the naked +valley dusky shadows, which occasionally assumed shapes that looked +like the vague semblance of gigantic human forms. + +"How long I had been hurrying onward I know not, when, with a kind of +suddenness, I found myself approaching a graveyard. It was situated on +the spur of a hill, and there was no fence around it, nor anything to +protect it from the incursions of passers-by. There was something in +the general appearance of this spot that made me half fancy I had seen +it before; and I should have taken it to be the same that I had often +noticed on my way to the fort, but that the latter was only a few +hundred yards distant therefrom, whereas I must have traversed several +miles at least. As I drew near, moreover, I observed that the head- +stones did not appear so ancient and decayed as those of the other. But +what chiefly attracted my attention was the figure that was leaning or +half sitting upon one of the largest of the upright slabs near the +road. It was a female figure draped in black, and a closer inspection-- +for I was soon within a few yards of her--showed that she wore the +calla, or long hooded cloak, the most common as well as the most +ancient garment of Irish women, and doubtless of Spanish origin. + +"I was a trifle startled by this apparition, so unexpected as it was, +and so strange did it seem that any human creature should be at that +hour of the night in so desolate and sinister a place. Involuntarily I +paused as I came opposite her, and gazed at her intently. But the +moonlight fell behind her, and the deep hood of her cloak so completely +shadowed her face that I was unable to discern anything but the sparkle +of a pair of eyes, which appeared to be returning my gaze with much +vivacity. + +"'You seem to be at home here,' I said, at length. 'Can you tell me +where I am?' + +"Hereupon the mysterious personage broke into a light laugh, which, +though in itself musical and agreeable, was of a timbre and intonation +that caused my heart to beat rather faster than my late pedestrian +exertions warranted; for it was the identical laugh (or so my +imagination persuaded me) that had echoed in my ears as I arose from my +tumble an hour or two ago. For the rest, it was the laugh of a young +woman, and presumably of a pretty one; and yet it had a wild, airy, +mocking quality, that seemed hardly human at all, or not, at any rate, +characteristic of a being of affections and limitations like unto ours. +But this impression of mine was fostered, no doubt, by the unusual and +uncanny circumstances of the occasion. + +"'Sure, sir,' said she, 'you're at the grave of Ethelind Fionguala.' + +"As she spoke she rose to her feet, and pointed to the inscription on +the stone. I bent forward, and was able, without much difficulty, to +decipher the name, and a date which indicated that the occupant of the +grave must have entered the disembodied state between two and three +centuries ago. + +"'And who are you?' was my next question. + +"'I'm called Elsie,' she replied. 'But where would your honor be going +November-eve?' + +"I mentioned my destination, and asked her whether she could direct me +thither. + +"'Indeed, then, 'tis there I'm going myself,' Elsie replied; 'and if +your honor'll follow me, and play me a tune on the pretty instrument, +'tisn't long we'll be on the road.' + +"She pointed to the banjo which I carried wrapped up under my arm. How +she knew that it was a musical instrument I could not imagine; +possibly, I thought, she may have seen me playing on it as I strolled +about the environs of the town. Be that as it may, I offered no +opposition to the bargain, and further intimated that I would reward +her more substantially on our arrival. At that she laughed again, and +made a peculiar gesture with her hand above her head. I uncovered my +banjo, swept my fingers across the strings, and struck into a fantastic +dance-measure, to the music of which we proceeded along the path, Elsie +slightly in advance, her feet keeping time to the airy measure. In +fact, she trod so lightly, with an elastic, undulating movement, that +with a little more it seemed as if she might float onward like a +spirit. The extreme whiteness of her feet attracted my eye, and I was +surprised to find that instead of being bare, as I had supposed, these +were incased in white satin slippers quaintly embroidered with gold +thread. + +"'Elsie,' said I, lengthening my steps so as to come up with her, +'where do you live, and what do you do for a living?' + +"'Sure, I live by myself,' she answered; 'and if you'd be after knowing +how, you must come and see for yourself.' + +"'Are you in the habit of walking over the hills at night in shoes like +that?' + +"'And why would I not?' she asked, in her turn. 'And where did your +honor get the pretty gold ring on your finger?' + +"The ring, which was of no great intrinsic value, had struck my eye in +an old curiosity-shop in Cork. It was an antique of very old-fashioned +design, and might have belonged (as the vender assured me was the case) +to one of the early kings or queens of Ireland. + +"'Do you like it?' said I. + +"'Will your honor be after making a present of it to Elsie?' she +returned, with an insinuating tone and turn of the head. + +"'Maybe I will, Elsie, on one condition. I am an artist; I make +pictures of people. If you will promise to come to my studio and let me +paint your portrait, I'll give you the ring, and some money besides.' + +"'And will you give me the ring now?' said Elsie. + +"'Yes, if you'll promise.' + +"'And will you play the music to me?' she continued. + +"'As much as you like.' + +"'But maybe I'll not be handsome enough for ye,' said she, with a +glance of her eyes beneath the dark hood. + +"'I'll take the risk of that,' I answered, laughing, 'though, all the +same, I don't mind taking a peep beforehand to remember you by.' So +saying, I put forth a hand to draw back the concealing hood. But Elsie +eluded me, I scarce know how, and laughed a third time, with the same +airy, mocking cadence. + +"'Give me the ring first, and then you shall see me,' she said, +coaxingly. + +"'Stretch out your hand, then,' returned I, removing the ring from my +finger. 'When we are better acquainted, Elsie, you won't be so +suspicious.' + +"She held out a slender, delicate hand, on the forefinger of which I +slipped the ring. As I did so, the folds of her cloak fell a little +apart, affording me a glimpse of a white shoulder and of a dress that +seemed in that deceptive semi-darkness to be wrought of rich and costly +material; and I caught, too, or so I fancied, the frosty sparkle of +precious stones. + +"'Arrah, mind where ye tread!' said Elsie, in a sudden, sharp tone. + +"I looked round, and became aware for the first time that we were +standing near the middle of a ruined bridge which spanned a rapid +stream that flowed at a considerable depth below. The parapet of the +bridge on one side was broken down, and I must have been, in fact, in +imminent danger of stepping over into empty air. I made my way +cautiously across the decaying structure; but, when I turned to assist +Elsie, she was nowhere to be seen. + +"What had become of the girl? I called, but no answer came. I gazed +about on every side, but no trace of her was visible. Unless she had +plunged into the narrow abyss at my feet, there was no place where she +could have concealed herself--none at least that I could discover. She +had vanished, nevertheless; and since her disappearance must have been +premeditated, I finally came to the conclusion that it was useless to +attempt to find her. She would present herself again in her own good +time, or not at all. She had given me the slip very cleverly, and I +must make the best of it. The adventure was perhaps worth the ring. + +"On resuming my way, I was not a little relieved to find that I once +more knew where I was. The bridge that I had just crossed was none +other than the one I mentioned some time back; I was within a mile of +the town, and my way lay clear before me. The moon, moreover, had now +quite dispersed the clouds, and shone down with exquisite brilliance. +Whatever her other failings, Elsie had been a trustworthy guide; she +had brought me out of the depth of elf-land into the material world +again. It had been a singular adventure, certainly; and I mused over it +with a sense of mysterious pleasure as I sauntered along, humming +snatches of airs, and accompanying myself on the strings. Hark! what +light step was that behind me? It sounded like Elsie's; but no, Elsie +was not there. The same impression or hallucination, however, recurred +several times before I reached the outskirts of the town--the tread of +an airy foot behind or beside my own. The fancy did not make me +nervous; on the contrary, I was pleased with the notion of being thus +haunted, and gave myself up to a romantic and genial vein of reverie. + +"After passing one or two roofless and moss-grown cottages, I entered +the narrow and rambling street which leads through the town. This +street a short distance down widens a little, as if to afford the +wayfarer space to observe a remarkable old house that stands on the +northern side. The house was built of stone, and in a noble style of +architecture; it reminded me somewhat of certain palaces of the old +Italian nobility that I had seen on the Continent, and it may very +probably have been built by one of the Italian or Spanish immigrants of +the sixteenth or seventeenth century. The molding of the projecting +windows and arched doorway was richly carved, and upon the front of the +building was an escutcheon wrought in high relief, though I could not +make out the purport of the device. The moonlight falling upon this +picturesque pile enhanced all its beauties, and at the same time made +it seem like a vision that might dissolve away when the light ceased to +shine. I must often have seen the house before, and yet I retained no +definite recollection of it; I had never until now examined it with my +eyes open, so to speak. Leaning against the wall on the opposite side +of the street, I contemplated it for a long while at my leisure. The +window at the corner was really a very fine and massive affair. It +projected over the pavement below, throwing a heavy shadow aslant; the +frames of the diamond-paned lattices were heavily mullioned. How often +in past ages had that lattice been pushed open by some fair hand, +revealing to a lover waiting beneath in the moonlight the charming +countenance of his high-born mistress! Those were brave days. They had +passed away long since. The great house had stood empty for who could +tell how many years; only bats and vermin were its inhabitants. Where +now were those who had built it? and who were they? Probably the very +name of them was forgotten. + +"As I continued to stare upward, however, a conjecture presented itself +to my mind which rapidly ripened into a conviction. Was not this the +house that Dr. Dudeen had described that very evening as having been +formerly the abode of the Kern of Querin and his mysterious bride? +There was the projecting window, the arched doorway. Yes, beyond a +doubt this was the very house. I emitted a low exclamation of renewed +interest and pleasure, and my speculations took a still more +imaginative, but also a more definite turn. + +"What had been the fate of that lovely lady after the Kern had brought +her home insensible in his arms? Did she recover, and were they married +and made happy ever after; or had the sequel been a tragic one? I +remembered to have read that the victims of vampires generally became +vampires themselves. Then my thoughts went back to that grave on the +hill-side. Surely that was unconsecrated ground. Why had they buried +her there? Ethelind of the white shoulder! Ah! why had not I lived in +those days; or why might not some magic cause them to live again for +me? Then would I seek this street at midnight, and standing here +beneath her window, I would lightly touch the strings of my bandore +until the casement opened cautiously and she looked down. A sweet +vision indeed! And what prevented my realizing it? Only a matter of a +couple of centuries or so. And was time, then, at which poets and +philosophers sneer, so rigid and real a matter that a little faith and +imagination might not overcome it? At all events, I had my banjo, the +bandore's legitimate and lineal descendant, and the memory of Fionguala +should have the love-ditty. + +"Hereupon, having retuned the instrument, I launched forth into an old +Spanish love-song, which I had met with in some moldy library during my +travels, and had set to music of my own. I sang low, for the deserted +street re-echoed the lightest sound, and what I sang must reach only my +lady's ears. The words were warm with the fire of the ancient Spanish +chivalry, and I threw into their expression all the passion of the +lovers of romance. Surely Fionguala, the white-shouldered, would hear, +and awaken from her sleep of centuries, and come to the latticed +casement and look down! Hist! see yonder! What light--what shadow is +that that seems to flit from room to room within the abandoned house, +and now approaches the mullioned window? Are my eyes dazzled by the +play of the moonlight, or does the casement move--does it open? Nay, +this is no delusion; there is no error of the senses here. There is +simply a woman, young, beautiful, and richly attired, bending forward +from the window, and silently beckoning me to approach. + +"Too much amazed to be conscious of amazement, I advanced until I stood +directly beneath the casement, and the lady's face, as she stooped +toward me, was not more than twice a man's height from my own. She +smiled and kissed her finger-tips; something white fluttered in her +hand, then fell through the air to the ground at my feet. The next +moment she had withdrawn, and I heard the lattice close. I picked up +what she had let fall; it was a delicate lace handkerchief, +tied to the handle of an elaborately wrought bronze key. It was +evidently the key of the house, and invited me to enter. I loosened it +from the handkerchief, which bore a faint, delicious perfume, like the +aroma of flowers in an ancient garden, and turned to the arched +doorway. I felt no misgiving, and scarcely any sense of strangeness. +All was as I had wished it to be, and as it should be; the mediaeval +age was alive once more, and as for myself, I almost felt the velvet +cloak hanging from my shoulder and the long rapier dangling at my belt. +Standing in front of the door I thrust the key into the lock, turned +it, and felt the bolt yield. The next instant the door was opened, +apparently from within; I stepped across the threshold, the door closed +again, and I was alone in the house, and in darkness. + +"Not alone, however! As I extended my hand to grope my way it was met +by another hand, soft, slender, and cold, which insinuated itself +gently into mine and drew me forward. Forward I went, nothing loath; +the darkness was impenetrable, but I could hear the light rustle of a +dress close to me, and the same delicious perfume that had emanated +from the handkerchief enriched the air that I breathed, while the +little hand that clasped and was clasped by my own alternately +tightened and half relaxed the hold of its soft cold fingers. In this +manner, and treading lightly, we traversed what I presumed to be a +long, irregular passageway, and ascended a staircase. Then another +corridor, until finally we paused, a door opened, emitting a flood of +soft light, into which we entered, still hand in hand. The darkness and +the doubt were at an end. + +"The room was of imposing dimensions, and was furnished and decorated +in a style of antique splendor. The walls were draped with mellow hues +of tapestry; clusters of candles burned in polished silver sconces, and +were reflected and multiplied in tall mirrors placed in the four +corners of the room. The heavy beams of the dark oaken ceiling crossed +each other in squares, and were laboriously carved; the curtains and +the drapery of the chairs were of heavy-figured damask. At one end of +the room was a broad ottoman, and in front of it a table, on which was +set forth, in massive silver dishes, a sumptuous repast, with wines in +crystal beakers. At the side was a vast and deep fire-place, with space +enough on the broad hearth to burn whole trunks of trees. No fire, +however, was there, but only a great heap of dead embers; and the room, +for all its magnificence, was cold--cold as a tomb, or as my lady's +hand--and it sent a subtle chill creeping to my heart. + +"But my lady! how fair she was! I gave but a passing glance at the +room; my eyes and my thoughts were all for her. She was dressed in +white, like a bride; diamonds sparkled in her dark hair and on her +snowy bosom; her lovely face and slender lips were pale, and all the +paler for the dusky glow of her eyes. She gazed at me with a strange, +elusive smile; and yet there was, in her aspect and bearing, something +familiar in the midst of strangeness, like the burden of a song heard +long ago and recalled among other conditions and surroundings. It +seemed to me that something in me recognized her and knew her, had +known her always. She was the woman of whom I had dreamed, whom I had +beheld in visions, whose voice and face had haunted me from boyhood up. +Whether we had ever met before, as human beings meet, I knew not; +perhaps I had been blindly seeking her all over the world, and she had +been awaiting me in this splendid room, sitting by those dead embers +until all the warmth had gone out of her blood, only to be restored by +the heat with which my love might supply her. + +"'I thought you had forgotten me,' she said, nodding as if in answer to +my thought. 'The night was so late--our one night of the year! How my +heart rejoiced when I heard your dear voice singing the song I know so +well! Kiss me--my lips are cold!' + +"Cold indeed they were--cold as the lips of death. But the warmth of my +own seemed to revive them. They were now tinged with a faint color, and +in her cheeks also appeared a delicate shade of pink. She drew fuller +breath, as one who recovers from a long lethargy. Was it my life that +was feeding her? I was ready to give her all. She drew me to the table +and pointed to the viands and the wine. + +"'Eat and drink,' she said. 'You have traveled far, and you need food.' + +"'Will you eat and drink with me?' said I, pouring out the wine. + +"'You are the only nourishment I want,' was her answer.' This wine is +thin and cold. Give me wine as red as your blood and as warm, and I +will drain a goblet to the dregs.' + +"At these words, I know not why, a slight shiver passed through me. She +seemed to gain vitality and strength at every instant, but the chill of +the great room struck into me more and more. + +"She broke into a fantastic flow of spirits, clapping her hands, and +dancing about me like a child. Who was she? And was I myself, or was +she mocking mo when she implied that we had belonged to each other of +old? At length she stood still before me, crossing her hands over her +breast. I saw upon the forefinger of her right hand the gleam of an +antique ring. + +"'Where did you get that ring?' I demanded. + +"She shook her head and laughed. 'Have you been faithful?' she asked. +'It is my ring; it is the ring that unites us; it is the ring you gave +me when you loved me first. It is the ring of the Kern--the fairy ring, +and I am your Ethelind--Ethelind Fionguala.' + +"'So be it,' I said, casting aside all doubt and fear, and yielding +myself wholly to the spell of her inscrutable eyes and wooing lips. +'You are mine, and I am yours, and let us be happy while the hours +last.' + +"'You are mine, and I am yours,' she repeated, nodding her head with an +elfish smile. 'Come and sit beside me, and sing that sweet song again +that you sang to me so long ago. Ah, now I shall live a hundred years.' + +"We seated ourselves on the ottoman, and while she nestled luxuriously +among the cushions, I took my banjo and sang to her. The song and the +music resounded through the lofty room, and came back in throbbing +echoes. And before me as I sang I saw the face and form of Ethelind +Fionguala, in her jeweled bridal dress, gazing at me with burning eyes. +She was pale no longer, but ruddy and warm, and life was like a flame +within her. It was I who had become cold and bloodless, yet with the +last life that was in me I would have sung to her of love that can +never die. But at length my eyes grew dim, the room seemed to darken, +the form of Ethelind alternately brightened and waxed indistinct, like +the last flickerings of a fire; I swayed toward her, and felt myself +lapsing into unconsciousness, with my head resting on her white +shoulder." + +Here Keningale paused a few moments in his story, flung a fresh log +upon the fire, and then continued: + +"I awoke, I know not how long afterward. I was in a vast, empty room in +a ruined building. Rotten shreds of drapery depended from the walls, +and heavy festoons of spiders' webs gray with dust covered the windows, +which were destitute of glass or sash; they had been boarded up with +rough planks which had themselves become rotten with age, and admitted +through their holes and crevices pallid rays of light and chilly +draughts of air. A bat, disturbed by these rays or by my own movement, +detached himself from his hold on a remnant of moldy tapestry near me, +and after circling dizzily around my head, wheeled the flickering +noiselessness of his flight into a darker corner. As I arose unsteadily +from the heap of miscellaneous rubbish on which I had been lying, +something which had been resting across my knees fell to the floor with +a rattle. I picked it up, and found it to be my banjo--as you see it +now. + +"Well, that is all I have to tell. My health was seriously impaired; +all the blood seemed to have been drawn out of my veins; I was pale and +haggard, and the chill--Ah, that chill," murmured Keningale, drawing +nearer to the fire, and spreading out his hands to catch the warmth--" +I shall never get over it; I shall carry it to my grave." + + + + +"WHEN HALF-GODS GO, THE GODS ARRIVE." + + +"What a beautiful girl!" said Mr. Ambrose Drayton to himself; "and how +much she looks like--" He cut the comparison short, and turned his eyes +seaward, pulling at his mustache meditatively the while. + +"This American atmosphere, fresh and pure as it is in the nostrils, is +heavy-laden with reminiscences," his thoughts ran on. "Reminiscences, +but always with differences, the chief difference being, no doubt, in +myself. And no wonder. Nineteen years; yes, it's positively nineteen +years since I stood here and gazed out through yonder gap between the +headlands. Nineteen years of foreign lands, foreign men and manners, +the courts, the camps, the schools; adventure, business, and pleasure-- +if I may lightly use so mysterious a word. Nineteen and twenty are +thirty-nine; in my case say sixty at least. Why, a girl like that +lovely young thing walking away there with her light step and her +innocent heart would take me to be sixty to a dead certainty. A rather +well-preserved man of sixty--that's how she'd describe me to the young +fellow she's given her heart to. Well, sixty or forty, what difference? +When a man has passed the age at which he falls in love, he is the peer +of Methuselah from that time forth. But what a fiery season that of +love is while it lasts! Ay, and it burns something out of the soul that +never grows again. And well that it should do so: a susceptible heart +is a troublesome burden to lug round the world. Curious that I should +be even thinking of such things: association, I suppose. Here it was +that we met and here we parted. But what a different place it was then! +A lovely cape, half bleak moorland and half shaggy wood, a few rocky +headlands and a great many coots and gulls, and one solitary old +farmhouse standing just where that spick-and-span summer hotel, with +its balconies and cupolas, stands now. So it was nineteen years ago, +and so it may be again, perhaps, nine hundred years hence; but +meanwhile, what a pretty array of modern aesthetic cottages, and plank +walks, and bridges, and bathing-houses, and pleasure-boats! And what an +admirable concourse of well-dressed and pleasurably inclined men and +women! After all, my countrymen are the finest-looking and most +prosperous-appearing people on the globe. They have traveled a little +faster than I have, and on a somewhat different track; but I would +rather be among them than anywhere else. Yes, I won't go back to +London, nor yet to Paris, or Calcutta, or Cairo. I'll buy a cottage +here at Squittig Point, and live and die here and in New York. I wonder +whether Mary is alive and mother of a dozen children, or--not!" + +"Auntie," said Miss Leithe to her relative, as they regained the +veranda of their cottage after their morning stroll on the beach, "who +was that gentleman who looked at us?" + +"Hey?--who?" inquired the widow of the late Mr. Corwin, absently. + +"The one in the thin gray suit and Panama hat; you must have seen him. +A very distinguished-looking man and yet very simple and pleasant; +like some of those nice middle-aged men that you see in 'Punch,' +slenderly built, with handsome chin and eyes, and thick mustache and +whiskers. Oh, auntie, why do you never notice things? I think a man +between forty and fifty is ever so much nicer than when they're +younger. They know how to be courteous, and they're not afraid of being +natural. I mean this one looks as if he would. But he must be somebody +remarkable in some way--don't you think so? There's something about +him--something graceful and gentle and refined and manly--that makes +most other men seem common beside him. Who do you suppose he can be?" + +"Who?--what have you been saying, my dear?" inquired Aunt Corwin, +rousing herself from the perusal of a letter. "Here's Sarah writes that +Frank Redmond was to sail from Havre the 20th; so he won't be here for +a week or ten days yet." + +"Well, he might not have come at all," said the girl, coloring +slightly. "I'm sure I didn't think he would, when he went away." + +"You are both of you a year older and wiser," said the widow, +meditatively; "and you have learned, I hope, not to irritate a man +needlessly. I never irritated Corwin in all my life. They don't +understand it." + +"Here comes Mr. Haymaker," observed Miss Leithe. "I shall ask him." + +"Don't ask him in," said Mrs. Corwin, retiring; "he chatters like an +organ-grinder." + +"Oh, good-morning, Miss Mary!" exclaimed Mr. Haymaker, as he mounted +the steps of the veranda, with his hands extended and his customary +effusion. "How charming you are looking after your bath and your walk +and all! Did you ever see such a charming morning? I never was at a +place I liked so much as Squittig Point; the new Newport, I call it-- +eh? the new Newport. So fashionable already, and only been going, as +one might say, three or four years! Such charming people here! Oh, by- +the-way, whom do you think I ran across just now? You wouldn't know +him, though--been abroad since before you were born, I should think. +Most charming man I ever met, and awfully wealthy. Ran across him in +Europe--Paris, I think it was--stop! or was it Vienna? Well, never +mind. Drayton, that's his name; ever hear of him? Ambrose Drayton. Made +a great fortune in the tea-trade; or was it in the mines? I've +forgotten. Well, no matter. Great traveler, too--Africa and the Corea, +and all that sort of thing; and fought under Garibaldi, they say; and +he had the charge of some diplomatic affair at Pekin once. The +quietest, most gentlemanly fellow you ever saw. Oh, you must meet him. +He's come back to stay, and will probably spend the summer here. I'll +get him and introduce him. Oh, he'll be charmed--we all shall." + +"What sort of a looking person is he?" Miss Leithe inquired. + +"Oh, charming--just right! Trifle above medium height; rather lighter +weight than I am, but graceful; grayish hair, heavy mustache, blue +eyes; style of a retired English colonel, rather. You know what I mean +--trifle reticent, but charming manners. Stop! there he goes now--see +him? Just stopping to light a cigar--in a line with the light-house. +Now he's thrown away the match, and walking on again. That's Ambrose +Drayton. Introduce him on the sands this afternoon. How is your good +aunt to-day? So sorry not to have seen her! Well, I must be off; +awfully busy to-day. Good-by, my dear Miss Mary; see you this +afternoon. Good-by. Oh, make my compliments to your good aunt, won't +you? Thanks. So charmed! _Au revoir_." + +"Has that fool gone?" demanded a voice from within. + +"Yes, Auntie," the young lady answered. + +"Then come in to your dinner," the voice rejoined, accompanied by the +sound of a chair being drawn up to a table and sat down upon. Mary +Leithe, after casting a glance after the retreating figure of Mr. +Haymaker and another toward the light-house, passed slowly through the +wire-net doors and disappeared. + +Mr. Drayton had perforce engaged his accommodations at the hotel, all +the cottages being either private property or rented, and was likewise +constrained, therefore, to eat his dinner in public. But Mr. Drayton +was not a hater of his species, nor a fearer of it; and though he had +not acquired precisely our American habits and customs, he was disposed +to be as little strange to them as possible. Accordingly, when the gong +sounded, he entered the large dining-room with great intrepidity. The +arrangement of tables was not continuous, but many small tables, +capable of accommodating from two to six, were dotted about everywhere. +Mr. Drayton established himself at the smallest of them, situated in a +part of the room whence he had a view not only of the room itself, but +of the blue sea and yellow rocks on the other side. This preliminary +feat of generalship accomplished, he took a folded dollar bill from his +pocket and silently held it up in the air, the result being the speedy +capture of a waiter and the introduction of dinner. + +But at this juncture Mr. Haymaker came pitching into the room, as his +nature was, and pinned himself to a standstill, as it were, with his +eyeglass, in the central aisle of tables. Drayton at once gave himself +up for lost, and therefore received Mr. Haymaker with kindness and +serenity when, a minute or two later, he came plunging up, in his usual +ecstasy of sputtering amiability, and seated himself in the chair at +the other side of the table with an air as if everything were charming +in the most charming of all possible worlds, and he himself the most +charming person in it. + +"My dear Drayton, though," exclaimed Mr. Haymaker, in the interval +between the soup and the bluefish, "there is some one here you must +know--most charming girl you ever knew in your life, and has set her +heart on knowing you. We were talking about you this morning--Miss Mary +Leithe. Lovely name, too; pity ever to change it--he! he! he! Why, you +must have seen her about here; has an old aunt, widow of Jim Corwin, +who's dead and gone these five years. You recognize her, of course?" + +"Not as you describe her," said Mr. Drayton, helping his friend to +fish. + +"Oh, the handsomest girl about here; tallish, wavy brown hair, soft +brown eyes, the loveliest-shaped eyes in the world, my dear fellow; +complexion like a Titian, figure slender yet, but promising. A way of +giving you her hand that makes you wish she would take your heart," +pursued Mr. Haymaker, impetuously filling his mouth with bluefish, +during the disposal of which he lost the thread of his harangue. +Drayton, however, seemed disposed to recover it for him. + +"Is this young lady from New England?" he inquired. + +"New-Yorker by birth," responded the ever-vivacious Haymaker; "father a +Southern man; mother a Bostonian. Father died eight or nine years after +marriage; mother survived him six years; girl left in care of old Mrs. +Corwin--good old creature, but vague--very vague. Don't fancy the +marriage was a very fortunate one; a little friction, more or less. +Leithe was rather a wild, unreliable sort of man; Mrs. Leithe a woman +not easily influenced--immensely charming, though, and all that, but a +trifle narrow and set. Well, you know, it was this way: Leithe was an +immensely wealthy man when she married him; lost his money, struggled +along, good deal of friction; Mrs. Leithe probably felt she had made a +mistake, and that sort of thing. But Miss Mary here, very different +style, looks like her mother, but softer; more in her, too. Very little +money, poor girl, but charming. Oh! you must know her." + +"What did you say her mother's maiden name was?" + +"Maiden name? Let me see. Why--oh, no--oh, yes--Cleveland, Mary +Cleveland." + +"Mary Cleveland, of Boston; married Hamilton Leithe, about nineteen +years ago. I used to know the lady. And this is her daughter! And Mary +Cleveland is dead!--Help yourself, Haymaker. I never take more than one +course at this hour of the day." + +"But you must let me introduce you, you know," mumbled Haymaker, +through his succotash. + +"I hardly know," said Drayton, rubbing his mustache. "Pardon me if I +leave you," he added, looking at his watch. "It is later than I +thought." + +Nothing more was seen of Drayton for the rest of that day. But the next +morning, as Mary Leithe sat on the Bowlder Rock, with a book on her +lap, and her eyes on the bathers, and her thoughts elsewhere, she heard +a light, leisurely tread behind her, and a gentlemanly, effective +figure made its appearance, carrying a malacca walking-stick, and a +small telescope in a leather case slung over the shoulder. + +"Good-morning, Miss Leithe," said this personage, in a quiet and +pleasant voice. "I knew your mother before you were born, and I can not +feel like a stranger toward her daughter. My name is Ambrose Drayton. +You look something like your mother, I think." + +"I think I remember mamma's having spoken of you," said Mary Leithe, +looking up a little shyly, but with a smile that was the most winning +of her many winning manifestations. Her upper lip, short, but somewhat +fuller than the lower one, was always alive with delicate movements; +the corners of her mouth were blunt, the teeth small; and the smile was +such as Psyche's might have been when Cupid waked her with a kiss. + +"It was here I first met your mother," continued Drayton, taking his +place beside her. "We often sat together on this very rock. I was a +young fellow then, scarcely older than you, and very full of romance +and enthusiasm. Your mother--". He paused a moment, looking at his +companion with a grave smile in his eyes. "If I had been as dear to her +as she was to me," he went on, "you would have been our daughter." + +Mary looked out upon the bathers, and upon the azure bay, and into her +own virgin heart. "Are you married, too?" she asked at length. + +"I was cut out for an old bachelor, and I have been true to my +destiny," was his reply. "Besides, I've lived abroad till a month or +two ago, and good Americans don't marry foreign wives." + +"I should like to go abroad," said Mary Leithe. + +"It is the privilege of Americans," said Drayton. "Other people are +born abroad, and never know the delight of real travel. But, after all, +America is best. The life of the world culminates here. We are the prow +of the vessel; there may be more comfort amidships, but we are the +first to touch the unknown seas. And the foremost men of all nations +are foremost only in so far as they are at heart American; that is to +say, America is, at present, even more an idea and a principle than it +is a country. The nation has perhaps not yet risen to the height of its +opportunities. So you have never crossed the Atlantic?" + +"No; my father never wanted to go; and after he died, mamma could not." + +"Well, our American Emerson says, you know, that, as the good of travel +respects only the mind, we need not depend for it on railways and +steamboats." + +"It seems to me, if we never moved ourselves, our minds would never +really move either." + +"Where would you most care to go?" + +"To Rome, and Jerusalem, and Egypt, and London." + +"Why?" + +"They seem like parts of my mind that I shall never know unless I visit +them." + +"Is there no part of the world that answers to your heart?" + +"Oh, the beautiful parts everywhere, I suppose." + +"I can well believe it," said Drayton, but with so much simplicity and +straightforwardness that Mary Leithe's cheeks scarcely changed color. +"And there is beauty enough here," he added, after a pause. + +"Yes; I have always liked this place," said she, "though the cottages +seem a pity." + +"You knew the old farm-house, then?" + +"Oh, yes; I used to play in the farm-yard when I was a little girl. +After my father died, Mamma used to come here every year. And my aunt +has a cottage here now. You haven't met my aunt, Mr. Drayton?" + +"I wished to know you first. But now I want to know her, and to become +one of the family. There is no one left, I find, who belongs to me. +What would you think of me for a bachelor uncle?" + +"I would like it very much," said Mary, with a smile. + +"Then let us begin," returned Drayton. + +Several days passed away very pleasantly. Never was there a bachelor +uncle so charming, as Haymaker would have said, as Drayton. The kind of +life in the midst of which he found himself was altogether novel and +delightful to him. In some aspects it was like enjoying for the first +time a part of his existence which he should have enjoyed in youth, but +had missed; and in many ways he doubtless enjoyed it more now than he +would have done then, for he brought it to a maturity of experience +which had taught him the inestimable value of simple things; a quiet +nobility of character and clearness of knowledge that enabled him to +perceive and follow the right course in small things as in great; a +serene yet cordial temperament that rendered him the cheerfulest and +most trustworthy of companions; a generous and masculine disposition, +as able to direct as to comply; and years which could sympathize +impartially with youth and age, and supply something which each lacked. +He, meanwhile, sometimes seemed to himself to be walking in a dream. +The region in which he was living, changed, yet so familiar, the +thought of being once more, after so many years of homeless wandering, +in his own land and among his own countrymen, and the companionship of +Mary Leithe, like, yet so unlike, the Mary Cleveland he had known and +loved, possessing in reality all the tenderness and lovely virginal +sweetness that he had imagined in the other, with a warmth of heart +that rejuvenated his own, and a depth and freshness of mind answering +to the wisdom that he had drawn from experience, and rendering her, +though in her different and feminine sphere, his equal--all these +things made Drayton feel as if he would either awake and find them the +phantasmagoria of a beautiful dream, or as if the past time were the +dream, and this the reality. Certainly, in this ardent, penetrating +light of the present, the past looked vaporous and dim, like a range of +mountains scaled long ago and vanishing on the horizon. + +And was this all? Doubtless it was, at first. It was natural that +Drayton should regard with peculiar tenderness the daughter of the +woman he had loved. She was an orphan, and poor; he was alone in the +world, with no one dependent upon him, and with wealth which could find +no better use than to afford this girl the opportunities and the +enjoyments which she else must lack. His anticipations in returning to +America had been somewhat cold and vague. It was his native land; but +abstract patriotism is, after all, rather chilly diet for a human being +to feed his heart upon. The unexpected apparition of Mary Leithe had +provided just that vividness and particularity that were wanting. +Insensibly Drayton bestowed upon her all the essence of the love of +country which he had cherished untainted throughout his long exile. It +was so much easier and simpler a thing to know and appreciate her than +to do as much for the United States and their fifty million +inhabitants, national, political, and social, that it is no wonder if +Drayton, as a modest and sane gentleman, preferred to make the former +the symbol of the latter--of all, at least, that was good and lovable +therein. At the same time, so clear-headed a man could scarcely have +failed to be aware that his affection for Mary Leithe was not actually +dependent upon the fact of her being an emblem. Upon what, then, was it +dependent? Upon her being the daughter of Mary Cleveland? It was true +that he had loved Mary Cleveland; but she had deliberately jilted him +to marry a wealthier man, and was therefore connected with and +responsible for the most painful as well as the most pleasurable +episode of his early life. Mary Leithe bore some personal resemblance +to her mother; but had she been as like her in character and +disposition as she was in figure and feature, would Drayton, knowing +what he knew, have felt drawn toward her? A man does not remain for +twenty years under the influence of an unreasonable and mistaken +passion. Drayton certainly had not, although his disappointment had +kept him a bachelor all his life, and altered the whole course of his +existence. But when we have once embarked upon a certain career, we +continue in it long after the motive which started us has been +forgotten. No; Drayton's regard for Mary Leithe must stand on its own +basis, independent of all other considerations. + +What, in the next place, was the nature of this regard? Was it merely +avuncular, or something different? Drayton assured himself that it was +the former. He was a man of the world, and had done with passions. The +idea of his falling in love made him smile in a deprecatory manner. +That the object of such love should be a girl eighteen years his junior +rendered the suggestion yet more irrational. She was lustrous with +lovable qualities, which he genially recognized and appreciated; nay, +he might love her, but the love would be a quasi-paternal one, not the +love that demands absolute possession and brooks no rivalry. His +attitude was contemplative and beneficent, not selfish and exclusive. +His greatest pleasure would be to see her married to some one worthy of +her. Meantime he might devote himself to her freely and without fear. + +And yet, once again, was he not the dupe of himself and of a +convention? Was his the mood in which an uncle studies his niece, or +even a father his daughter? How often during the day was she absent +from his thoughts, or from his dreams at night? What else gave him so +much happiness as to please her, and what would he not do to give her +pleasure? Why was he dissatisfied and aimless when not in her presence? +Why so full-orbed and complete when she was near? He was eighteen years +the elder, but there was in her a fullness of nature, a balanced +development, which went far toward annulling the discrepancy. Moreover, +though she was young, he was not old, and surely he had the knowledge, +the resources, and the will to make her life happy. There would be, he +fancied, a certain poetical justice in such an issue. It would +illustrate the slow, seemingly severe, but really tender wisdom of +Providence. Out of the very ashes of his dead hopes would arise this +gracious flower of promise. She would afford him scope for the +employment of all those riches, moral and material, which life had +brought him; she would be his reward for having lived honorably and +purely for purity's and honor's sake. But why multiply reasons? There +was justification enough; and true love knows nothing of justification. +He loved her, then; and now, did she love him? This was the real +problem--the mystery of a maiden's heart, which all Solomon's wisdom +and Bacon's logic fail to elucidate. Drayton did what he could. Once he +came to her with the news that he must be absent from an excursion +which they had planned, and he saw genuine disappointment darken her +sweet face, and her slender figure seem to droop. This was well as far +as it went, but beyond that it proved nothing. Another time he gave her +a curious little shell which he had picked up while they were rambling +together along the beach, and some time afterward he accidently noticed +that she was wearing it by a ribbon round her neck. This seemed better. +Again, on a night when there was a social gathering at the hotel, he +entered the room and sat apart at one of the windows, and as long as he +remained there he felt that her gaze was upon him, and twice or thrice +when he raised his eyes they were met by hers, and she smiled; and +afterward, when he was speaking near her, he noticed that she +disregarded what her companion of the moment was saying to her, and +listened only to him. Was not all this encouragement? Nevertheless, +whenever, presuming upon this, he hazarded less ambiguous +demonstrations, she seemed to shrink back and appear strange and +troubled. This behavior perplexed him; he doubted the evidence that had +given him hope; feared that he was a fool; that she divined his love, +and pitied him, and would have him, if at all, only out of pity. +Thereupon he took himself sternly to task, and resolved to give her up. + +It was a transparent July afternoon, with white and gray clouds +drifting across a clear blue sky, and a southwesterly breeze roughening +the dark waves and showing their white shoulders. Mary Leithe and +Drayton came slowly along the rocks, he assisting her to climb or +descend the more rugged places, and occasionally pausing with her to +watch the white canvas of a yacht shiver in the breeze as she went +about, or to question whether yonder flash amid the waves, where the +gulls were hovering and dipping, were a bluefish breaking water. At +length they reached a little nook in the seaward face, which, by often +resorting to it, they had in a manner made their own. It was a small +shelf in the rock, spacious enough for two to sit in at ease, with a +back to lean against, and at one side a bit of level ledge which served +as a stand or table. Before them was the sea, which, at high-water +mark, rose to within three yards of their feet; while from the +shoreward side they were concealed by the ascending wall of sandstone. +Drayton had brought a cushion with him, which he arranged in Mary's +seat; and when they had established themselves, he took a volume of +Emerson's poems from his pocket and laid it on the rock beside him. + +"Are you comfortable?" he asked. + +"Yes; I wish it would be always like this--the weather, and the sun, +and the time--so that we might stay here forever." + +"Forever is the least useful word in human language," observed Drayton. +"In the perspective of time, a few hours, or days, or years, seem alike +inconsiderable." + +"But it is not the same to our hearts, which live forever," she +returned. + +"The life of the heart is love," said Drayton. + +"And that lasts forever," said Mary Leithe. + +"True love lasts, but the object changes," was his reply. + +"It seems to change sometimes," said she. + +"But I think it is only our perception that is misled. We think we have +found what we love; but afterward, perhaps, we find it was not in the +person we supposed, but in some other. Then we love it in him; not +because our heart has changed, but just because it has not." + +"Has that been your experience?" Drayton asked, with a smile. + +"Oh, I was speaking generally," she said, looking down. + +"It may be the truth; but if so, it is a perilous thing to be loved." + +"Perilous?" + +"Why, yes. How can the lover be sure that he really is what his +mistress takes him for? After all, a man has and is nothing in himself. +His life, his love, his goodness, such as they are, flow into him from +his Creator, in such measure as he is capable or desirous of receiving +them. And he may receive more at one time than at another. How shall he +know when he may lose the talismanic virtue that won her love--even +supposing he ever possessed it?" + +"I don't know how to argue," said Mary Leithe; "I can only feel when a +thing is true or not--or when I think it is--and say what I feel." + +"Well, I am wise enough to trust the truth of your feeling before any +argument." + +This assertion somewhat disconcerted Mary Leithe, who never liked to be +confronted with her own shadow, so to speak. However, she seemed +resolved on this occasion to give fuller utterance than usual to what +was in her mind; so, after a pause, she continued, "It is not only how +much we are capable of receiving from God, but the peculiar way in +which each one of us shows what is in him, that makes the difference in +people. It is not the talisman so much as the manner of using it that +wins a girl's love. And she may think one manner good until she comes +to know that another is better." + +"And, later, that another is better still?" + +"You trust my feeling less than you thought, you see," said Mary, +blushing, and with a tremor of her lips. + +"Perhaps I am afraid of trusting it too much," Drayton replied, fixing +his eyes upon her. Then he went on, with a changed tone and manner: +"This metaphysical discussion of ours reminds me of one of Emerson's +poems, whose book, by-the-by, I brought with me. Have you ever read +them?" + +"Very few of them," said Mary; "I don't seem to belong to them." + +"Not many people can eat them raw, I imagine," rejoined Drayton, +laughing. "They must be masticated by the mind before they can nourish +the heart, and some of them--However, the one I am thinking of is very +beautiful, take it how you will. It is called, 'Give all to Love.' Do +you know it!" + +Mary shook her head. + +"Then listen to it," said Drayton, and he read the poem to her. "What +do you think of it?" he asked when he had ended. + +"It is very short," said Mary, "and it is certainly beautiful; but I +don't understand some parts of it, and I don't think I like some other +parts." + +"It is a true poem," returned Drayton; "it has a body and a soul; the +body is beautiful, but the soul is more beautiful still; and where the +body seems incomplete, the soul is most nearly perfect. Be loyal, it +says, to the highest good you know; follow it through all difficulties +and dangers; make it the core of your heart and the life of your soul; +and yet, be free of it! For the hour may always be at hand when that +good that you have lived for and lived in must be given up. And then-- +what says the poet? + + "'Though thou loved her as thyself, + As a self of purer clay, + Though her parting dims the day, + Stealing grace from all alive, + Heartily know, + When half-gods go, + The gods arrive.'" + +There was something ominous in Drayton's tone, quiet and pleasant +though it sounded to the ear, and Mary could not speak; she knew that +he would speak again, and that his words would bring the issue finally +before her. + +He shut the book and put it in his pocket. For some time he remained +silent, gazing eastward across the waves, which came from afar to break +against the rock at their feet. A small white pyramidal object stood up +against the horizon verge, and upon this Drayton's attention appeared +to be concentrated. + +"If you should ever decide to come," he said at length, "and want the +services of a courier who knows the ground well, I shall be at your +disposal." + +"Come where?" she said, falteringly. + +"Eastward. To Europe." + +"You will go with me?" + +"Hardly that. But I shall be there to receive you." + +"You are going back?" + +"In a month, or thereabouts." + +"Oh, Mr. Drayton! Why?" + +"Well, for several reasons. My coming here was an experiment. It might +have succeeded, but it was made too late. I am too old for this young +country. I love it, but I can be of no service to it. On the contrary, +so far as I was anything, I should be in the way. It does not need me, +and I have been an exile so long as to have lost my right to inflict +myself upon it. Yet I am glad to have been here; the little time that I +have been here has recompensed me for all the sorrows of my life, and I +shall never forget an hour of it as long as I live." + +"Are you quite sure that your country does not want you--need you?" + +"I should not like my assurance to be made more sure." + +"How can you know? Who has told you? Whom have you asked?" + +"There are some questions which it is not wise to put; questions whose +answers may seem ungracious to give, and are sad to hear." + +"But the answer might not seem so. And how can it be given until you +ask it?" + +Drayton turned and looked at her. His face was losing its resolute +composure, and there was a glow in his eyes and in his cheeks that +called up an answering warmth in her own. + +"Do you know where my country is?" he demanded, almost sternly. + +"It is where you are loved and wanted most, is it not?" she said, +breathlessly. + +"Do not deceive yourself--nor me!" exclaimed Drayton, putting out his +hand toward her, and half rising from the rock. "There is only one +thing more to say." + +A sea-gull flew close by them, and swept on, and in a moment was far +away, and lost to sight. So in our lives does happiness come so near us +as almost to brush our cheeks with its wings, and then pass on, and +become as unattainable as the stars. As Mary Leithe was about to speak, +a shadow cast from above fell across her face and figure. She seemed to +feel a sort of chill from it, warm though the day was; and without +moving her eyes from Drayton's face to see whence the shadow came, her +expression underwent a subtle and sudden change, losing the fervor of a +moment before, and becoming relaxed and dismayed. But after a moment +Drayton looked up, and immediately rose to his feet, exclaiming, "Frank +Redmond!" + +On the rock just above them stood a young man, dark of complexion, with +eager eyes, and a figure athletic and strong. As Drayton spoke his +name, his countenance assumed an expression half-way between pleased +surprise and jealous suspicion. Meanwhile Mary Leithe had covered her +face with her hands. + +"I'm sure I'd no idea you were here, Mr. Drayton," said the young man. +"I was looking for Mary Leithe. Is that she?" + +Mary uncovered her face, and rose to her feet languidly. She did not as +yet look toward Redmond, but she said in a low voice, "How do you do, +Frank? You--came so suddenly!" + +"I didn't stop to think--that I might interrupt you," said he, drawing +back a little and lifting his head. + +Drayton had been observing the two intently, breathing constrainedly +the while, and grasping a jutting point of rock with his hand as he +stood. He now said, in a genial and matter-of-fact voice, "Well, Master +Frank, I shall have an account to settle with you when you and my niece +have got through your first greetings." + +"Mary your niece!" cried Redmond, bewildered. + +"My niece by courtesy; her mother was a dear friend of mine before Mary +was born. And now it appears that she is the young lady, the dearest +and loveliest ever heard of, about whom you used to rhapsodize to me in +Dresden! Why didn't you tell me her name? By Jove, you young rogue, +I've a good mind to refuse my consent to the match! What if I had +married her off to some other young fellow, and you been left in the +lurch! However, luckily for you, I haven't been able thus far to find +any one who in my opinion--How do you do, Frank? You--came so +suddenly!" + +"I didn't stop to think--that I might interrupt you," said he, drawing +back a little and lifting his head. + +Drayton had been observing the two intently, breathing constrainedly +the while, and grasping a jutting point of rock with his hand as he +stood. He now said, in a genial and matter-of-fact voice, "Well, Master +Frank, I shall have an account to settle with you when you and my niece +have got through your first greetings." + +"Mary your niece!" cried Redmond, bewildered. + +"My niece by courtesy; her mother was a dear friend of mine before Mary +was born. And now it appears that she is the young lady, the dearest +and loveliest ever heard of, about whom you used to rhapsodize to me in +Dresden! Why didn't you tell me her name? By Jove, you young rogue, +I've a good mind to refuse my consent to the match! What if I had +married her off to some other young fellow, and you been left in the +lurch! However, luckily for you, I haven't been able thus far to find +any one who in my opinion would suit her better. Come down here and +shake hands, Frank, and then I'll leave you to make your excuses to +Miss Leithe. And the next time you come back to her after a year's +absence, don't frighten her heart into her mouth by springing out on +her like a jack-in-the-box. Send a bunch of flowers or a signet-ring to +tell her you are coming, or you may get a cooler reception than you'd +like!" + +"Ah! Ambrose Drayton," he sighed to himself as he clambered down the +rocks alone, and sauntered along the shore, "there is no fool like an +old fool. Where were your eyes that you couldn't have seen what was the +matter? Her heart was fighting against itself all the time, poor child! +And you, selfish brute, bringing to bear on her all your antiquated +charms and fascinations--Heaven save the mark!--and bullying her into +the belief that you could make her happy! Thank God, Ambrose Drayton, +that your awakening did not come too late. A minute more would have +made her and you miserable for life--and Redmond too, confound him! And +yet they might have told me; one of them might have told me, surely. +Even at my age it is hard to remember one's own insignificance. And I +did love her! God knows how I loved her! I hope he loves her as much; +but how can he help it! And she--she won't remember long! An old fellow +who made believe he was her uncle, and made rather a fool of himself; +went back to Europe, and never been heard of since. Ah, me!" + +"Where did you get acquainted with Mr. Drayton, Frank?" + +"At Dresden. It was during the vacation at Freiberg last winter, and I +had come over to Dresden to have a good time. We stayed at the same +hotel. We played a game of billiards together, and he chatted with me +about America, and asked me about my mining studies at Freiberg; and I +thought him about the best fellow I'd ever met. But I didn't know then +--I hadn't any conception what a splendid fellow he really was. If ever +I hear anybody talking of their ideal of a gentleman, I shall ask them +if they ever met Ambrose Drayton." + +"What did he do?" + +"Well, the story isn't much to my credit; if it hadn't been for him, +you might never have heard of me again; and it will serve me right to +confess the whole thing to you. It's about a--woman." + +"What sort of a woman?" + +"She called herself a countess; but there's no telling what she really +was. I only know she got me into a fearful scrape, and if it hadn't +been for Mr. Drayton--" + +"Did you do anything wrong, Frank?" + +"No; upon my honor as a gentleman! If I had, Mary, I wouldn't be here +now." + +Mary looked at him with a sad face. "Of course I believe you, Frank," +she said. "But I think I would rather not hear any more about it." + +"Well, I'll only tell you what Mr. Drayton did. I told him all about it +--how it began, and how it went on, and all; and how I was engaged to a +girl in America--I didn't tell him your name; and I wasn't sure, then, +whether you'd ever marry me, after all; because, you know, you had been +awfully angry with me before I went away, because I wanted to study in +Europe instead of staying at home. But, you see, I've got my diploma, +and that'll give me a better start than I ever should have had if I'd +only studied here. However--what was I saying? Oh! so he said he would +find out about the countess, and talk to her himself. And how he +managed I don't know; and he gave me a tremendous hauling over the +coals for having been such an idiot; but it seems that instead of being +a poor injured, deceived creature, with a broken heart, and all that +sort of thing, she was a regular adventuress--an old hand at it, and +had got lots of money out of other fellows for fear she would make a +row. But Mr. Drayton had an interview with her. I was there, and I +never shall forget it if I live to a hundred. You never saw anybody so +quiet, so courteous, so resolute, and so immitigably stern as he was. +And yet he seemed to be stern only against the wrong she was trying to +do, and to be feeling kindness and compassion for her all the time. She +tried everything she knew, but it wasn't a bit of use, and at last she +broke down and cried, and carried on like a child. Then Mr. Drayton +took her out of the room, and I don't know what happened, but I've +always suspected that he sent her off with money enough in her pocket +to become an honest woman with if she chose to; but he never would +admit it to me. He came back to me after a while, and told me to have +nothing more to do with any woman, good or bad except the woman I +meant to marry, and I promised him I wouldn't, and I kept my promise. +But we have him to thank for our happiness, Mary." + +Tears came silently into Mary's eyes; she said nothing, but sat with +her hands clasped around one knee, gazing seaward. + +"You don't seem very happy, though," pursued Redmond, after a pause; +"and you acted so oddly when I first found you and Mr. Drayton +together--I almost thought--well, I didn't know what to think. You do +love me, don't you?" + +For a few moments Mary Leithe sat quite motionless, save for a slight +tremor of the nerves that pervaded her whole body; and then, all at +once, she melted into sobs. Redmond could not imagine what was the +matter with her; but he put his arms round her, and after a little +hesitation or resistance, the girl hid her face upon his shoulder, and +wept for the secret that she would never tell. + +But Mary Leithe's nature was not a stubborn one, and easily adapted +itself to the influences with which she was most closely in contact. +When she and Redmond presented themselves at Aunt Corwin's cottage that +evening her tears were dried, and only a tender dimness of the eyes and +a droop of her sweet mouth betrayed that she had shed any. + +"Mr. Drayton wanted to be remembered to you, Mary," observed Aunt +Corwin, shortly before going to bed. She had been floating colored sea- +weeds on paper all the time since supper, and had scarcely spoken a +dozen words. + +"Has he gone?" Mary asked. + +"Who? Oh, yes; he had a telegram, I believe. His trunks were to follow +him. He said he would write. I liked that man. He was not like Mr. +Haymaker; he was a gentleman. He took an interest in my collections, +and gave me several nice specimens. Your mother was a fool not to have +married him. I wish you could have married him yourself. But it was not +to be expected that he would care for a child like you, even if your +head were not turned by that Frank Redmond. How soon shall you let him +marry you?" + +"Whenever he likes," answered Mary Leithe, turning away. + +As a matter of fact, they were married the following winter. A week +before the ceremony a letter arrived for Mary from New York, addressed +in a legal hand. It contained an intimation that, in accordance with +the instructions of their client, Mr. Ambrose Drayton, the undersigned +had placed to her account the sum of fifty thousand dollars as a +preliminary bequest, it being the intention of Mr. Drayton to make her +his heir. There was an inclosure from Drayton himself, which Mary, +after a moment's hesitation, placed in her lover's hand, and bade him +break the seal. + +It contained only a few lines, wishing happiness to the bride and +bridegroom, and hoping they all might meet in Europe, should the +wedding trip extend so far. "And as for you, my dear niece," continued +the writer, "whenever you think of me remember that little poem of +Emerson's that we read on the rocks the last time I saw you. The longer +I live the more of truth do I find in it, especially in the last verse: + + "'Heartily know, + When half-gods go, + The gods arrive!'" + +"What does that mean?" demanded Redmond, looking up from the letter. + +"We can not know except by experience," answered Mary Leithe. + + + + +"SET NOT THY FOOT ON GRAVES." + + +_New York_, _April 29th_.--Last night I came upon this +passage in my old author: "Friend, take it sadly home to thee--Age and +Youthe are strangers still. Youthe, being ignorant of the wisdome of +Age, which is Experience, but wise with its own wisdome, which is of +the unshackeled Soule, or Intuition, is great in Enterprise, but slack +in Achievement. Holding itself equal to all attempts and conditions, +and to be heir, not of its own spanne of yeares and compasse of +Faculties only, but of all time and all Human Nature--such, I saye, +being its illusion (if, indeede, it be illusion, and not in some sorte +a Truth), it still underrateth the value of Opportunitie, and, in the +vain beleefe that the City of its Expectation is paved with Golde and +walled with Precious Stones, letteth slip betwixt its fingers those +diamondes and treasures which ironical Fate offereth it.... But see +nowe what the case is when this youthe becometh in yeares. For nowe he +can nowise understand what defecte of Judgmente (or effecte of +insanitie rather) did leade him so to despise and, as it were, reject +those Giftes and golden chaunces which come but once to mortal men. +Experience (that saturnine Pedagogue) hath taught him what manner of +man he is, and that, farre from enjoying that Deceptive Seeminge or +mirage of Freedome which would persuade him that he may run hither and +thither as the whim prompteth over the face of the Earthe--yea, take +the wings of the morninge and winnowe his aerie way to the Pleiadies-- +he must e'en plod heavilie and with paine along that single and narrowe +Path whereto the limitations of his personal nature and profession +confine him--happy if he arrive with muche diligence and faire credit +at the ende thereof, and falle not ignobly by the way. Neverthelesse-- +for so great is the infatuation of man, who, although he acquireth all +other knowledge, yet arriveth not at the knowledge of Himself--if to +the Sage of Experience he proffered once again the gauds and prizes of +youthe, which he hath ever since regretted and longed for--what doeth +he in his wisdome? Verilie, so longe as the matter remaineth _in +nubibis_, as the Latins say, or in the Region of the Imagination, as +oure speeche hath it, he will beleeve, yea, take his oathe, that he +still is master of all those capacities and energies whiche, in his +youthe, would have prompted and enabled him to profit by this desired +occurrence. Yet shall it appeare (if the thinge be brought still +further to the teste, and, from an Imagination or Dreame, become an +actual Realitie), that he will shrinke from and decline that which he +did erste so ardently sigh for and covet. And the reason of this is as +follows, to-wit: That Habit or Custome hath brought him more to love +and affect those very ways and conditions of life, yea, those +inconveniences and deficiencies which he useth to deplore and abhorre, +than that Crown of Golde or Jewel of Happiness whose withholding he +hath all his life lamented. Hence we may learne, that what is past, is +dead, and that though thoughts be free, nature is ever captive, and +loveth her chaine." + +This is too lugubrious and cynical not to have some truth in it; but I +am unwilling to believe that more than half of it is true. The author +himself was evidently an old man, and therefore a prejudiced judge; and +he did not make allowances for the range and variety of temperament. +Age is not a matter of years, and scarcely of experience. The only +really old persons are the selfish ones. The man whose thoughts, +actions, and affections center upon himself, soon acquires a fixity and +crustiness which (if to be old is to be "strange to youth") is old as +nothing else is. But the man who makes the welfare and happiness of +others his happiness, is as young at threescore as he was at twenty, +and perhaps even younger, for he has had no time to grow old. + +_April 30th_.--The Courtneys are in town! This is, I believe, her +first visit to America since he married her. At all events, I have not +seen or heard of her in all these seven years. I wonder ... I was going +to write, I wonder whether she remembers me. Of course she remembers +me, in a sort of way. I am tied up somewhere among her bundle of +recollections, and occasionally, in an idle moment, her eye falls upon +me, and moves her, perhaps, to smile or to sigh. For my own part, in +thinking over our old days, I find I forget her less than I had +supposed. Probably she has been more or less consciously in my mind +throughout. In the same way, one has always latent within him the +knowledge that he must die; but it does not follow that he is +continually musing on the thought of death. As with death, so with this +old love of mine. What a difference, if we had married! She was a very +lovely girl--at least, I thought so then. Very likely I should not +think her so now. My taste and knowledge have developed; a different +order of things interests me. It may not be an altogether pleasant +thing to confess; but, knowing myself as I now do, I have often thanked +my stars that I am a bachelor. + +Doubtless she is even more changed than I am. A woman changes more than +a man in seven years, and a married woman especially must change a +great deal from twenty-two to twenty-nine. Think of Ethel Leigh being +in her thirtieth year! and the mother of four or five children, +perhaps. Well, for the matter of that, think of the romantic and +ambitious young Claude Campbell being an old bachelor of forty! I have +married Art instead of Ethel, and she, instead of being Mrs. Campbell, +is Mrs. Courtney. + +It was a surprising thing--her marrying him so suddenly. But, +appearances to the contrary notwithstanding, I have never quite made up +my mind that Ethel was really fickle. She did it out of pique, or +pride, or impulse, or whatever it is that sways women in such cases. +She was angry, or indignant--how like fire and ice at once she was when +she was angry!--and she was resolved to show me that she could do +without me. She would not listen to my explanations; and I was always +awkward and stiff about making explanations. Besides, it was not an +easy matter to explain, especially to a girl like her. With a married +woman or a widow it would have been a simple thing enough. But Ethel +Leigh, the minister's daughter--innocent, ignorant, passionate--she would +tolerate nothing short of a public disavowal and discontinuance of my +relations with Mrs. Murray, and that, of course, I could not consent to, +though heaven knows (and so must Ethel, by this time) that Mrs. Murray was +nothing to me save as she was the wife of my friend, during whose +enforced absence I was bound to look after her, to some extent. It was +not my fault that poor Mrs. Murray was a fool. But such are the +trumpery seeds from which tragedies grow. Not that ours was a tragedy, +exactly: Ethel married her English admirer, and I became a somewhat +distinguished artist, that is all. I wonder whether she has been happy! +Likely enough; she was born to be wealthy; Englishmen make good +husbands sometimes, and her London life must have been a brilliant +one.... I have been looking at my old photograph of her--the one she +gave me the morning after we were engaged. Tall, slender, dark, with +level brows, and the bearing of a Diana. She certainly was handsome, +and I shall not run the risk of spoiling this fine memory by calling on +her. Even if she have not deteriorated, she can scarcely have improved. +Nay, even were she the same now as then, I should not find her so, +because of the change in myself. Why should I blink the truth? +Experience, culture, and the sober second thought of middle age have +carried me far beyond the point where I could any longer be in sympathy +with this crude, thin-skinned, impulsive girl. And then--four or five +children! Decidedly, I will give her a wide berth. And Courtney +himself, with his big beard, small brain, and obtrusive laugh! I shall +step across to California for a few months. + +_May 1st_.--Called this morning on Ethel Leigh--Mrs. Deighton +Courtney, that is to say. She is not so much changed, but she has +certainly improved. When I say she has not changed much, I refer to her +physical appearance. Her features are scarcely altered; her figure is a +little fuller and more compact; in her bearing there is a certain quiet +composure and self-possession--the air of a woman who has seen the +world, has received admiration, and is familiar with the graceful +little arts of social intercourse. In short, she has acquired a high +external polish; and that is precisely what she most needed. Evidently, +too, there is an increased mental refinement corresponding to the +outward manner. She has mellowed, sweetened--whether deepened or not I +should hesitate to affirm. But I am quite sure that I find her more +charming to talk with, more supple in intercourse, more fascinating, in +a word, than formerly. We chatted discursively and rather volubly for +more than an hour; yet we did not touch on anything very serious or +profound. They are staying at the Brevoort House. Courtney himself, by- +the-by, is still in Boston (they landed there), where business will +detain him a few days. Ethel goes on a house-hunting expedition to- +morrow, and I am going with her; for New York has altered out of her +recollection during these seven years. They are to remain here three +years, perhaps longer. Courtney is to establish and oversee an American +branch of his English business. + +They have only one child--a pretty little thing: Susie and I became +great friends. + +Mrs. Courtney opened the door of the private sitting-room in which I +was awaiting her, and came in--beautifully! She has learned how to do +that since I knew her. My own long residence in Paris has made me more +critical than I used to be in such matters; but I do not remember +having met any woman in society with manners more nearly perfect than +Mrs. Courtney's. Ethel Leigh used to be, upon occasion, painfully +abrupt and disconcerting; and her movements and attitudes, though there +was abundant native grace in them, were often careless and +unconventional. Of course, I do not forget that niceties of deportment, +without sound qualities of mind and heart to back them, are of trifling +value; but the two kinds of attraction are by no means incompatible +with each other. Mrs. Courtney smiles often. Ethel Leigh used to smile +rarely, although, when the smile did come, it was irresistibly winning; +there was in it exquisite significance and tenderness. It is a +beautiful smile still, but that charm of rarity (if it be a charm) is +lacking. It is a conventional smile more than a spontaneous or a happy +one; indeed, it led me to surmise that she had perhaps not been very +happy since we last met, and had learned to use this smile as a sort of +veil. Not that I suppose for a moment that Courtney has ill-treated +her. I never could see anything in the man beyond a superficial +comeliness, a talent for business, and an affable temper; but ho was +not in any sense a bad fellow. Besides, he was over head and ears in +love with her; and Ethel would be sure to have the upper hand of a +nature like his. No, her unhappiness, if she be unhappy, would be due +to no such cause, she and her husband are no doubt on good terms with +each other. But--suppose she has discovered that he fell short of what +she demanded in a husband; that she overmatched him; that, in order to +make their life smooth, she must descend to him? I imagine it may be +something of that kind. Poor Mrs. Courtney! + +She addressed me as "Mr. Campbell," and I dare say she was right. Women +best know how to meet these situations. To have called me "Claude" +would have placed us in a false position, by ignoring the changes that +have taken place. It is wise to respect these barriers; they are +conventional, but, rightly considered, they are more of an assistance +than of an obstacle to freedom of intercourse. I asked her how she +liked England. She smiled and said, "It was my business to like +England; still, I am glad to see America once more." + +"You will entertain a great deal, I presume--that sort of thing?" + +"We shall hope to make friends with people--and to meet old friends. +It is such a pleasant surprise to find you here. I heard you were +settled in Paris." + +"So I was, for several years; the Parisians said nice things about my +pictures. But one may weary even of Paris. I returned here two years +ago, and am now as much of a fixture in New York as if I'd never left +it." + +"But not a permanent fixture. Shall we never see you in London?" + +"My present probabilities lie rather in the direction of California. I +want to make some studies of the scenery and the atmosphere. Besides, I +am getting too old to think of another European residence." + +"No one gets old after thirty--especially no bachelor!" she answered, +with a smile. "But if you were ever to feel old, the society of London +would rejuvenate you." + +"It has certainly done you no harm. But you have the happiness to be +married." + +She looked at me pleasantly and said, "Yes, I make a good +Englishwoman." That sounded like an evasion, but the expression of her +face was not evasive. In the old days she would probably have flushed +up and said something cutting. + +"You must see my little girl," she said, after a while. + +The child was called, and presently came in. She resembles her mother, +and has a vivacity scarcely characteristic of English children. I am +not constitutionally a worshiper of children, but I liked Susie. She +put her arms round her mother's arm, and gazed at me with wide-eyed +scrutiny." + +"This is Mr. Campbell," said mamma. + +"My name is Susan Courtney," said the little thing. "We are going to +stay in New York three years. Hot here--this is only an hotel--we are +going to have a house. How do you do? This is my dolly." + +I saluted dolly, and thereby inspired its parent with confidence: she +put her hand in mine, and gave me her smooth little cheek to kiss. "You +are not like papa," she then observed. + +I smiled conciliatingly, being uncertain whether it were prudent to +follow this lead; but Mrs. Courtney asked, "In what way different, +dear?" + +"Papa has a beard," replied Susie. + +The incident rather struck me; it seemed to indicate that Mrs. Courtney +was under no apprehension that the child would say anything +embarrassing about the father. Having learned so much, I ventured +farther. + +"Do you love papa or mamma best?" I inquired. + +"I am with mamma most," she answered, after meditation, "but when papa +comes, I like him." + +This was non-committal. She continued, "Papa is coming here day after +to-morrow. To-morrow, mamma and I are going to find a house." + +"Your husband leaves all that to you?" I said, turning to Mrs. +Courtney. + +"Mr. Courtney never knows or cares what sort of a place he lives in. It +took me some little time to get used to that. I wanted everything to be +just in a certain way. They used to laugh at me, and say I was more +English than he." + +"Now that you are both here, you must both be American." + +"He doesn't enjoy America much. Of course, it is very different from +London. An Englishman can not be expected to care for American ways and +American quickness, and--" + +"American people?" I put in, laughingly. + +"Don't undress dolly here," she said to Susie. "It isn't time yet to +put her to bed, and she might catch cold." + +Was this another evasion? The serene face betrayed nothing, but she +had left unanswered the question that aimed at discovering how she and +her husband stood toward each other. After all, however, no answer +could have told me more than her no answer did--supposing it to have +been intentional. I soon afterward took my leave, after having arranged +to call to-morrow and accompany her and Susie on their house-hunting +expedition. Upon the whole, I don't think I am sorry to have renewed my +acquaintance with her. She is more delightful--as an acquaintance--than +when I knew her formerly. Should I have fallen in love with her had I +met her for the first time as she is now? Yes, and no! In the old days +there was something about her that commanded me--that fascinated my +youthful imagination. Perhaps it was only the freshness, the ignorance, +the timidity of young maidenhood--that mystery of possibilities of a +nature that has not yet met the world and received its impress for good +or evil. It is this which captivates in youth; and this, of course, +Mrs. Courtney has lost. But every quality that might captivate mature +manhood is hers, and, were I likely to think of marriage now, and were +she marriageable, she is the type of woman I would choose. Yet I do not +quite relish the perception that my present feminine ideal (whether it +be lower or higher) is not the former one. But,--frankly, would I marry +her if I could? I hardly know: I have got out of the habit of regarding +marriage as among my possibilities; many avenues of happiness that once +were open to me are now closed against me. Put it, that I have lost a +faculty--that I am now able to enjoy only in imagination a phase of +existence that, formerly, I could have enjoyed in fact. This bit of +self-analysis may be erroneous; but I would not like to run the risk of +proving it so! Am I not well enough off as I am? My health is fair, my +mind active, my reputation secure, my finances prosperous. The things +that I can dream must surely be better than anything that could happen. +I can picture, for example, a state of matrimonial felicity which no +marriage of mine could realize. Besides, I can, whenever I choose, see +Mrs. Courtney herself, talk with her, and enjoy her as a reasonable and +congenial friend, apart from the danger and disappointment that might +result from a closer connection. I think I have chosen the wiser part, +or, rather, the wiser part has been thrust upon me. That I shall never +be wildly happy is, at least, security that I shall never be profoundly +miserable. I shall simply be comfortable. Is this sour grapes? Am I, if not +counting, then discounting my eggs before they are hatched? To such +questions a practical--a materialized--answer would be the only +conclusive one. Were Mrs. Courtney ready to drop into my mouth, I +should either open my mouth, or else I should shut it, and either act +would be conclusive. But, so far from being ready to drop into my mouth, +she is immovably and (to all appearances) contentedly fixed where she +is. I suppose I am insinuating that appearances are deceptive; that she +may be unhappy with her husband, and desire to leave him. Well, there +is no technical evidence in support of such an hypothesis; but, again, in +a matter of this kind, it is not so much the technical as the indirect +evidence that tells--the cadences of the voice, the breathing, the +silences, the atmosphere. There is no denying that I did somehow +acquire a vague impression that Courtney is not so large a figure in his +wife's eyes as he might be. I may have been biased by my previous +conception of his character, or I may have misinterpreted the impalpable, +indescribable signs that I remarked in her. But, once more, how do I +know that her not caring for him would postulate her caring for me? Why +should she care for either of us? Our old romance is to her as the memory +of something read in a book, and it is powerless to make her heart beat +one throb the faster. Were Courtney to die to-morrow, would his widow +expect me to marry her? Not she! She would settle down here quietly, +educate her daughter, and think better of her departed husband with +every year that passed, and less of repeating the experiment that made +her his! I may be prone to romantic and elaborate speculations, but I am +not exactly a fool. I do not delude myself with the idea that Mrs. Courtney +is, at this moment, following my example by recording her impressions of +me at her own writing-desk, and asking herself whether--if such and +such a thing were to happen--such another would be apt to follow. +No; she has put Susie to bed, and is by this time asleep herself, after +having read through the "Post," or "Bazar," or the last new novel, as +her predilection may be. It is after midnight; since she has not followed +my example, I will follow hers; it is much the more sensible of the two. + +_May 2d_.--What a woman she is! and, in a different sense, what a +man I am! How little does a man know or suspect himself until he is +brought to the proof! How serenely and securely I philosophized and +laid down the law yesterday! and to-day, how strange to contrast the +event with my prognostication of it! And yet, again, how little has +happened that might not be told in such a way as to appear nothing! It +was the latent meaning, the spirit, the touch of look and tone. Her +husband may have reached New York by this time; they may be together at +this moment; he will find no perceptible change in her--perceptible to +him! He will be told that I have been her escort during the day, and +that I was polite and serviceable, and that a house has been selected. +What more is there to tell? Nothing--that he could hear or understand! +and yet--everything! He will say, "Yes, I recollect Campbell; nice +fellow; have him to dine with us one of these days." But I shall never +sit at their table; I shall never see her again; I can not! I shall +start for California next week. Meanwhile I will write down the history +of one day, for it is well to have these things set visibly before one +--to grasp the nettle, as it were. Nothing is so formidable as it +appears when we shrink from defining it to ourselves. + +I drove to the hotel in my brougham at eleven o'clock, as we had +previously arranged. She was ready and waiting for me, and little Susie +was with her. Ethel was charmingly dressed, and there was a soft look +in her eyes as she turned them on me--a look that seemed to say, "I +remember the past; it is pleasant to see you, so pleasant as to be +sad!" Susie came to me as if I were an old friend, and I lifted the +child from the floor and kissed her twice. + +"Why did you give me two kisses?" she demanded, as I put her down. +"Papa always gives me only one kiss." + +"Papa has mamma as well as you to kiss; but I have no one; I am an old +bachelor." + +"When you have known mamma longer, will you kiss her too?" + +"Old bachelors kiss nobody but little girls," I replied, laughing. + +"We went down to the brougham, and after we were seated and on our +way," Ethel said, "Already I feel so much at home in New York, it almost +startles me. I fancied I should have forgotten old associations--should +have grown out of sympathy with them; but I seem only to have learned +to appreciate them more. Our memory for some things is better than we +would believe." + +"There are two memories in us," I remarked; "the memory of the heart +and the memory of the head. The former never is lost, though the other +may be. But I had not supposed that you cared very deeply for the +American period of your life." + +"England is very agreeable," she said, rather hastily. She turned her +head and looked out of the window; but after a pause she added, as if +to herself, "but I am an American!" + +"There is, no doubt, a deep-rooted and substantial repose in English +life such as is scarcely to be found elsewhere," I said; "but, for all +that, I have often thought that the best part of domestic happiness +could exist nowhere but here. Here a man may marry the woman he loves, +and their affection for each other will be made stronger by the +hardships they may have to pass through. After all, when we come to the +end of our lives, it is not the business we have done, nor the social +distinction we have enjoyed--it is the love we have given and received +that we are glad of." + +"Mamma," inquired Susie, "does Mr. Campbell love you?" + +We both of us looked at the child and laughed a little. "Mr. Campbell +is an old friend," said Ethel. After a few moments she blushed. She +held in her hand some house-agents' orders to view houses, and these +she now began to examine. "Is this Madison Avenue place likely to be a +good one?" she asked me. + +"It is conveniently situated and comfortable; but I should think it +might be too large for a family of three. Perhaps, though, you don't +like a close fit?" + +"I don't like empty rooms, though I prefer such rooms as there are to +be large. But it doesn't make much difference. Mr. Courtney moves about +a good deal, and he is as happy in a hotel as anywhere. These American +hotels are luxurious and splendid, but they are not home-like to me." + +"I remember you used to dislike being among a crowd of people you +didn't know." + +"Yes, and I haven't yet learned to be sociable in that way. A friend is +more company for me than a score of acquaintances. Dear me! I'm afraid +New York will spoil me--for England!" + +"Perhaps Mr. Courtney may be cured of England by New York." + +She smiled and said, "Perhaps! He accommodates himself to things more +easily than I do, but I think one needs to be born in America to know +how to love it." + +Under the veil of discussing America and things in general, we were +talking of ourselves, awakening reminiscences of the past, and +discovering, with a pleasure we did not venture to acknowledge, that-- +allowing for the events and the years that had come between--we were as +much in accord as when we were young lovers. Yes, as much, and perhaps +even more. For surely, if one grows in the right way, the sphere of +knowledge and sympathy must enlarge, and thereby the various points of +contact between two minds and hearts must be multiplied. Ethel and I, +during these seven years, had traveled our round of daily life on +different sides of the earth; but the miles of sea and land which had +physically separated us had been powerless to estrange our spirits. +Nothing is more strange, in this mysterious complexity of impressions +and events that we call human existence, than the fact that two beings, +entirely cut off from all natural means of association and communion, +may yet, unknown to each other, be breathing the same spiritual air and +learning the same moral and intellectual lessons. Like two seeds of the +same species, planted, the one in American soil, the other in English, +Ethel and I had selected, by some instinct of the soul, the same +elements from our different surroundings; so that now, when we met once +more, we found a close and harmonious resemblance between the leaves +and blossoms of our experience. What can be more touching and +delightful than such a discovery? Or what more sad than to know that it +came too late for us to profit by it? + +Oh, Ethel, how easy it is to take the little step that separates light +from darkness, happiness from misery! Remembering that we live but +once, and that the worthy enjoyments of life are so limited in number +and so hard to get, it seems unjust and monstrous that one little hour +of jealousy or misunderstanding should wreck the fair prospects of +months and years. Why is mischief so much readier to our hand than +good? + +We got out at a house near the Park. I assisted Ethel to alight, and, +as her hand rested on mine, the thought crossed my mind--How sweet if +this were our own home that we are about to enter!--and I glanced at +her face to see whether a like thought had visited her. She maintained +a subdued demeanor, with an expression about the mouth and eyes of a +peculiar timid gentleness, and, as it were, a sort of mental leaning +upon me for support and protection. She felt, it may be, a little fear +of herself, at finding herself--in more senses than one--so near to me; +and, woman-like, she depended upon me to protect her against the very +peril of which I was the occasion. No higher or more delicate +compliment can be paid by a woman to a man; and I resolved that I would +do what in me lay to deserve it. But such resolutions are the hardest +in the world to keep, because the circumstance or the impulse of the +moment is continually in wait to betray you. Ethel was more fascinating +and lovely in this mood than in any other I had hitherto seen her in; +and the misgiving, from which I could not free myself, that the man +whom Fate had made her husband did not appreciate or properly cherish +the gift bestowed upon him, made me warm toward her more than ever. I +could scarcely have believed that such blood could flow in the sober +veins of my middle age; but love knows nothing of time or age! + +"I do not like this house," Susie declared, when we had been admitted +by the care-taker. "It has no carpets, nor chairs, nor pictures; and +the floor is dirty; and the walls are not pretty!" + +"I suppose one can have these houses decorated and furnished at short +notice?" Ethel asked me. + +"It would not take long. There are several firms that make it their +specialty." + +"I have always wanted to live in a house where the colors and forms +were to my taste. I don't know whether you remember that you used to +think I had some taste in such matters. Mr. Courtney, of course, +doesn't care much about art, and he didn't encourage me to carry out my +ideas. A business man can not be an artist, you know." + +"You yourself would have become an artist if--" I began; but I was +approaching dangerous ground, and I stopped. "This dining-room might be +done in Indian red," I remarked--"the woodwork, that is to say. The +walls would be a warm salmon color, which contrasts well with the cold +blue of the china, which it is the fashion to have about nowadays. As +for the furniture, antique dark oak is as safe as anything, don't you +think so?" + +"I should like all that," said she, moving a little nearer me, and +letting her eyes wander about the room with a pleased expression, until +at length they met my own. "If you could only design our decoration for +us, I'm sure it would be perfect; at least, I should be satisfied. +Well, and how should we... how ought the drawing-room to be done?" + +"There is a shade of yellow that is very agreeable for drawing-rooms, +and it goes very well with the dull peacock-blue which is in vogue now. +Then you could get one of those bloomy Morris friezes. There is some +very graceful Chippendale to be picked up in various places. And no +such good furniture is made nowadays. But I am advising you too much +from the artist's point of view." + +"Oh, I can get other sort of advice when I want it." She looked at me +with a smile; our glances met more often now than at first. "But it +seems to me," she went on, "that the way the house is built docs not +suit the way we want to decorate it. Let us look at a smaller one. I +should think ten rooms would be quite enough. And it would be nice to +have a corner house, would it not?" + +"If the question were only of our agreement, there would probably not +be much difficulty," I said, in a tone which I tried to make merely +courteous, but which may have revealed something more than courtesy +beneath it. + +In coming down-stairs she gathered her dress in her right hand and put +her left in my arm; and then, in a flash, the picture came before me of +the last time we had gone arm-in-arm together down-stairs. It was at +her father's house, and she was speaking to me of that unlucky Mrs. +Murray; we had our quarrel that evening in the drawing-room, and it was +never made up. From then till now, what a gulf! and yet those years +would have been but a bridge to pass over, save for the one barrier +that was insurmountable between us. + +"What has become of that Mrs. Murray whom you used to know?" she asked, +as we reached the foot of the stairs. She relinquished my arm as she +spoke, and faced me. + +I felt the blood come to my face. "Mrs. Murray was in my thoughts at +the same moment--and perhaps by the same train of associations." I +answered, "I don't know where she is now; I lost sight of her years +ago--soon after you were married, in fact. Why do you ask?" + +"You had not forgotten her, then?" + +"I had every reason to forget her, except the one reason for which I +have remembered her--and you know what that is! Have you mistrusted me +all this time?" + +"Oh, no--no! I don't think I really mistrusted you at all; and long ago +I admitted to myself that you had acted unselfishly and honorably. But +I was angry at the time; you know, sometimes a girl will be angry, even +when there is no good reason for it. I have long wished for an +opportunity to tell you this, for my own sake, you know, as well as for +yours." + +"I hardly know whether I am most glad or sorry to hear this," I said, +as we moved toward the door. "If you had only been able to say it, or +to think it, before ... there would have been a great difference!" + +"The worst of mistakes is, they are so seldom set right at the time, or +in the way they ought to be. Come, Susie, we are going away now. Susie, +do you most like to be American or English?" + +"English," replied Susie, without hesitation. + +Her mother turned to me and said in a low tone: + +"I love her, whichever she is." + +I understood what she meant. Susie was the symbol of that inevitable +element in our lives which seems to evolve itself without reference to +our desires or efforts; but which, nevertheless, when we have +recognized that it is inevitable, we learn (if we are wise) to accept +and even to love. Save for the estrangement between Ethel and myself, +Susie would never have existed; yet there she was, a beautiful child, +who had as good a right to be as either of us; and her mother loved +her, and, as it were, bade me love her also. I took the little maiden +by the hand and said, "You are right, Susie; the Americans are the +children of the English, and can not expect to be so wise and +comfortable as they. But you must remember that the Americans have a +future before them, and we are not enemies any more. Will you be +friends with me, and let me call you my little girl?" + +"I shouldn't mind being your little girl, if I could still have the +same mamma," was Susie's reply. "Papa is away a great deal, and you +could be papa, you know, until he came back." + +I made some laughing answer; but, in fact, Susie's frank analysis of +the situation poignantly kindled an imagination which stood in no need +of stimulus. Ah, if this were the Golden Age, when love never went +astray, how happy we might be! But it is not the Golden Age--far from +it! Meanwhile, I think I can assert, with a clear conscience, that no +dishonorable purpose possessed me. I loved Ethel too profoundly to wish +to do her wrong. Yet I may have wished--I did wish--that a kindly +Providence might have seen fit to remove the disabilities that +controlled us. If a wish could have removed Courtney painlessly to +another world, I think I should have wished it. There was something +exquisitely touching in Ethel's appearance and manner. She is as pure +as any woman that ever lived; but she is a woman! and I felt that, for +this day, I had a man's power over her. Occasionally I was conscious +that her eyes were resting on my face; when I addressed her, her aspect +softened and brightened; she fell into little moods of preoccupation +from which she would emerge with a sigh; in many ways she betrayed, +without knowing it, the secret that neither of us would mention. I do +not mean to imply that she expected me to mention it. A pure woman does +not realize the dangers of the world; and that very fact is itself her +strongest security against them. But, had I spoken, she would have +responded. It was a temptation which I could hardly have believed I +could have resisted as I did; but such a woman calls out all that is +best and noblest in a man; and, at the time, I was better than I am! + +When we were in the brougham again, I said, "If you will allow me, I +will drive you to a house I have seen, which belongs to a man with whom +I am slightly acquainted. He is on the point of leaving it, but his +furniture is still in it, and, as he is himself an artist and a man of +taste, it will be worth your while to look at it. He is rather deaf, +but that is all the better; we can express our opinions without +disturbing him. Perhaps you might arrange to take house and furniture +as they stand." + +"Whatever you advise, I shall like to do," Ethel answered. + +We presently arrived at the house, which was situated in the upper part +of the town, a little to the west of Fifth Avenue. It was a comely +gabled edifice of red brick, with square bay-windows and a roomy porch. +The occupant, Maler, a German, happened to be at home; and on my +sending in my card, we were admitted at once, and he came to greet us +in the hall in his usual hearty, headlong fashion. + +"My good Campbell," he exclaimed, in his blundering English, "very +delighted to see you. Ah, dis will be madame, and de little maid! So +you are married since some time--I have not know it! Your servant, +Madame Campbell. I know--all de artists know--your husband: we wish we +could paint how he can--but it is impossible! Ha, ha, ha! not so! Now, +I am very pleased you shall see dis house. May I beg de honor of +accompany you? First you shall see de studio; dat I call de stomach of +de house, eh? because it is most important of all de places, and make +de rest of de places live. See, I make dat window be put in--you find +no better light in New York. Den you see, here we have de alcove, where +Madame Campbell shall sit and make her sewing, while de husband do his +work on de easel. How you like dat portiere? I design him myself--oh, +yes, I do all here; you keep them if you like; I go to Germany, perhaps +not come back after some years, so I leave dem, not so? Now I show you +my little chamber of the piano. See, I make an arched ceiling--groined +arch, eh?--and I gild him; so I get pretty light and pretty sound, +not? Ah! madame, I have not de happiness to be married, but I make my +house so, dat if I get me a wife, she find all ready; but no wife come, +so I give him over to Herr Campbell and you. Now we mount up-stairs to +de bed-rooms, eh?" + +In this way he went over the entire house with us. His loud, jolly +voice, his resounding laugh, his bustling manner, his heedless, boy- +like self-confidence, and his deafness, made it impossible to get in a +word of explanation, and, after a few efforts, I gave up the attempt. + +"Let him suppose what he likes," I said aside to Ethel, "it can make no +difference; he is going away, and you will never see him again. After +all these years, it can do no great harm for us to play at being Mr. +and Mrs. Campbell for an hour!" + +"It is a very beautiful house," she said, tacitly accepting what I had +proposed. "It is such a house as I have always dreamed of living in. I +shall not care to look at any others. Will you tell him that we--that I +will take it just as it stands. You have made this a very pleasant day +for me--a very happy day," she added, in a lower tone. "Every room here +will be associated with you. You will come here often and see me, will +you not? Perhaps, after all, you might use the studio to paint my--or +Susie's portrait in." + +"I shall inflict myself upon you very often, I have no doubt," was all +I ventured to reply. I could not tell her, at that moment, that we must +never see each other again. She--after the manner of women--probably +supposes that a man's strength is limitless; that he may do with +himself and make of himself what he chooses; and she supposes that I +could visit her and converse with her day after day, and yet keep my +thoughts and my acts within such bounds as would enable me to take +Courtney honestly by the hand. But I know too well my own weakness, and +I shall leave her while yet I have power to do so. Tomorrow--or soon--I +will write to her one last letter, telling her why I go. + +Sudden and strange indeed has been this passionate episode in a life +which, methought, had done with passion. It has lasted hardly so many +hours as I have lived years; and yet, were I to live on into the next +century, it would never cease to influence me in all I think and do. I +can not solve to my satisfaction this problem--why two lives should be +wasted as ours have been. Courtney could have been happy with another +wife, or with no wife at all, perhaps; but, for Ethel and me, there +could be no happiness save in each other. But were she free to-day, the +separation that has already existed--long though it has been--would +only serve to render our future union more blissful and complete. We +have learned, by sad experience, the value of a love like ours, and we +should know how to give it its fullest and widest expression. But oh! +what a blank and chilly road lies before us now! + +I drove her back to her hotel; we hardly spoke all the way; my heart +was too full, and hers also, I think; though she did not know, as I +did, that it was our last interview. It must be our last! Heaven help +me to keep that resolution! + +Susie was not at all impressed by the pathos of the situation; she +babbled all the time, and thus, at all events, afforded us an excuse +for our silence. At parting, one incident occurred that may as well be +recorded. I had shaken hands with Ethel, speaking a few words of +farewell, and allowing her to infer that we might meet again on the +morrow; then I turned to Susie, and gave her the kiss which I would +have given the world to have had the right to press on her mother's +lips. Ethel saw, and, I think, understood. She stooped quickly down, +and laid her mouth where mine had been. Through the innocent medium of +the child, our hearts met; and then I saw her no more. + +_May 3d_.--Of course, it may not be true, probably it is not; +mistakes are so easily made in the first moments of such horror and +confusion; the dead come to life, and the living die. Or, at the worst, +he may be only wounded or disabled. At all events, I decline to +believe, save upon certain evidence, that the poor fellow has actually +been killed. Were it to turn out so, I should feel almost like a +murderer; for was not I writing, in this very journal, and perhaps at +the very moment the accident occurred, that if my wish could send him +to another world, I would not spare him? + +_Later_.--I have read all the accounts in the newspapers this +morning, and all agree in putting Courtney's name among the killed. +There can be no doubt about it any longer; he is dead. When the +collision occurred, the car in which he vas riding was thrown across +the track, and the other train crashed through it. Judging by the +condition of the body when discovered, death must have been nearly +instantaneous. Poor Courtney! My conscience is not at ease. Of course, +I am not really responsible; that is only imagination. But I begin to +suspect that my imagination has been playing me more than one trick +lately. + +And now, with this new state of affairs so suddenly and terribly +brought about, what is to be done? I am as yet scarcely in a condition +to reflect calmly; but a voice within me seems to say that something +else besides my conscience has been awakened by Courtney's death. Can +it be that imagination, dallying with what it took for impossibilities, +could so far mislead a man? Well, I shall start at once for the scene +of the disaster, and relieve the poor fellow's widow of whatever pain I +can. Ethel Courtney a widow! Ah, Ethel! Death sheds a ghastly light +upon the idle vagaries of the human heart. + +_May 15th_.--_Denver_, _Colorado_.--Magnificent weather +and scenery; very different from my own mental scenery and mood at this +moment. I am sorely out of spirits; and no wonder, after the reckless +and insane emotion of the first days of this month. One pays for such +indulgences at my age. + +I have been re-reading the foregoing pages of this journal. Was I a +fool or a coward, or was I merely intoxicated for eight-and-forty +hours? At all events, Courtney's tragic end sobered me, and put what I +had been doing in a true light. I am glad my insanity was not permitted +to proceed farther than it did; but I have quite enough to reproach +myself with as it is. So far as I hare been able to explain the matter +to myself, my prime error lay in attributing, in a world subject to +constant change, too much permanence to a given state of affairs. The +fact that Ethel was the wife of another man seemed to me so fixed and +unalterable that I allowed my imagination to play with the picture of +what might happen if that unalterable fact were altered. Secure in this +fallacy, I worked myself up to the pitch of believing that I was +actually and passionately in love with a woman whose inaccessibility +was, after all, her most winning attraction. Moreover, by writing down, +in this journal, the events and words of the hours we spent together, I +confirmed myself in my false persuasion, and probably imported into the +record of what we said and did an amount of color and hidden +significance that never, as I am now convinced, belonged to it in +reality. Deluded by the notion that I was playing with a fancy, I was +suddenly aroused to find myself imbrued in facts. The whole episode has +profoundly humiliated me, and degraded me in my own esteem. + +But I am not at the bottom of the mystery yet. Was I not in love with +Ethel? Surely I was, if love be anything. Then why did I not ask her to +marry me? Would she have refused me? No. That last look she gave me +from under her black veil, when I told her I was going away.... Ah, no, +she would not have refused me. Then why did I hesitate? Was not such a +marriage precisely what I have always longed for? During all these +seven years have I not been bewailing my bachelorhood, and wishing for +an Ethel to cheer my solitary fireside with her gracious presence, to +be interested in my work and hopes, to interest me in her wifely and +maternal ways and aspirations? And when at last all these things were +offered me, why did I shrink back and reject them? + +Honestly, I can not explain it. Perhaps, if I had never loved her +before, I might have loved her this time enough to unite my fate with +hers. Or, perhaps--for I may as well speak plainly, since I am speaking +to myself--perhaps, by force of habit, I had grown to love, better than +love itself, those self-same forlorn conditions and dreary solitudes +which I was continually lamenting and praying to be delivered from. +What a dismal solution of the problem this would be were it the true +one! It amounts to saying that I prefer an empty room, a silent hearth, +an old pair of slippers, and a dressing-gown to the love and +companionship of a refined and beautiful woman!--that I love even my +own discomforts more than the comfort she would give me! It sounds +absurd, scandalous, impossible; and yet, if it be not the literal +truth, I know not what the truth is. It is amazing that an educated and +intelligent man can live to be forty years old and still have come to +no better an understanding of himself than I had. Verily, as my old +author said, thought is free, but nature is captive, and loveth her +chain. Yes, my old author was right. + + + + +MY FRIEND PATON. + + +Mathew Morriss, my father, was a cotton merchant in Liverpool twenty- +five years ago--a steady, laborious, clear-headed man, very +affectionate and genial in his private intercourse. He was wealthy, and +we lived in a sumptuous house in the upper part of the city. This was +when I was about ten years old. My father was twice married; I was the +child of the first wife, who died when I was very young; my stepmother +came five years later. She was the elder of two sisters, both beautiful +women. The sister often came to visit us. I remember I liked her better +than I liked my stepmother; in fact, I regarded her with that sort of +romantic attachment that often is developed in lads of my age. She had +golden brown hair and a remarkably sweet voice, and she sang and played +in a manner that transported me with delight; for I was already devoted +to music. She was of a gentle yet impulsive temperament, easily moved +to smiles and tears; she seemed to me the perfection of womankind, and +I made no secret of my determination to marry her when I grew up. She +used to caress me, and look at me in a dreamy way, and tell me I was +the nicest and handsomest boy in the world. "And as soon as you are a +year older than I am, John," she would say, "you shall marry me, if you +like." + +Another frequent visitor at our house at this time was not nearly so +much a favorite of mine. This was a German, Adolf Körner by name, who +had been a clerk in my father's concern for a number of years, and had +just been admitted junior partner. My father placed every confidence in +him, and often declared that he had the best idea of business he had +ever met with. This may very likely have been the fact; but to me he +appeared simply a tall, grave, taciturn man, of cold manners, speaking +with a slight German accent, which I disliked. I suppose he was about +thirty-seven years of age, but I always thought of him as older than my +father, who was fifty. Another and more valid reason for my disliking +Körner was that he was in the habit of paying a great deal of attention +to my ladylove, Miss Juliet Tretherne. I used to upbraid Juliet about +encouraging his advances, and I expressed my opinion of him in the +plainest language, at which she would smile in a preoccupied wav, and +would sometimes draw me to her and kiss me on the forehead. Once she +said, "Mr. Körner is a very noble gentleman; you must not dislike him." +This had the effect of making me hate him all the more. + +One day I noticed an unusual commotion in the house, and Juliet came +down-stairs attired in a lovely white dress, with a long veil, and +fragrant flowers in her hair. She got into a carriage with my father +and stepmother, and drove away. I did not understand what it meant, and +no one told me. After they were gone I went into the drawing-room, and, +greatly to my surprise, saw there a long table covered with a white +cloth and laid out with a profusion of good things to eat and drink in +sparkling dishes and decanters. In the middle of the table was a great +cake covered with white frosting; the butler was arranging some flowers +round it. + +"What is that cake for, Curtis?" I asked. + +"For the bride, to be sure," said Curtis, without looking up. + +"The bride! who is she?" I demanded in astonishment. + +"Your aunt Juliet, to be sure!" said Curtis, composedly, stepping back +and contemplating his floral arrangement with his head on one side. + +I asked no more, but betook myself with all speed to my room, locked +the door, flung myself on the bed, and cried to heartbreaking with +grief, indignation, and mortification. After a very long time some one +tried the door, and a voice--the voice of Juliet--called to me. I made +no answer. She began to plead with me; I resisted as long as I could, +but finally my affection got the better of my resentment, and I arose +and opened the door, hiding my tear-stained face behind my arm. Juliet +caught me in her arms and kissed me; tears were running down her own +cheeks. How lovely she looked! My heart melted, and I was just on the +point of forgiving her when the voice of Körner became audible from +below, calling out "Mrs. Körner!" I tore myself away from her, and +cried passionately, "You don't love me! you love him! go to him!" She +looked at me for a moment with a pained expression; then she put her +hand in the pocket of her dress and drew out something done up in white +paper. "See what I have brought you, you unkind boy," said she. "What +is it?" I demanded. "A piece of my wedding-cake," she replied. "Give it +me!" said I. She put it in my hand; I ran forward to the head of the +stairs, which Körner was just ascending, dashed the cake in his face, +and then rushed back to my own room, whence neither threats nor coaxing +availed to draw me forth for the rest of the day. + +I never saw Juliet again. She and her husband departed on their +wedding-trip that afternoon; it was to take them as far as Germany, for +Körner said that he wished to visit his father and mother, who were +still alive, before settling down permanently in Liverpool. Whether +they really did so was never discovered. But, about a fortnight later, +a dreadful fact came to light. Körner--the grave and reticent Körner, +whom everybody trusted and thought so highly of--was a thief, and he +had gone off with more than half my father's property in his pocket. +The blow almost destroyed my father, and my stepmother, too, for that +matter, for at first it seemed as though Juliet must have been privy to +the crime. This, however, turned out not to have been the case. Her +fate must have been all the more terrible on that account; but no news +of either of them ever came back to us, and my father would never take +any measures to bring Körner to justice. It was several months before +he recovered from the shock sufficiently to take up business again; and +then the American Civil War came and completed his ruin. He died, a +poor and broken-down man, a year later. My stepmother, who was really +an admirable woman, realized whatever property remained to us, took a +small house, and sent me to an excellent school, where I was educated +for Cambridge. Meanwhile I had been devoting all possible time to +music; for I had determined to become a composer, and I was looking +forward, after taking my degree, to completing my musical education +abroad; but my mother's health was precarious, and, when the time came, +she found herself unequal to making the journey, and the change of +habits and surroundings that it implied. We lived very quietly in +Liverpool for three or four years; then she died, and, after I had +settled our affairs, I found myself in possession of a small income and +alone in the world. Without loss of time I set out for the Continent. + +I went to a German city, where the best musical training was to be had, +and made my arrangements to pass several years there. At the banker's, +when I went to provide for the regular receipt of my remittances, I met +a young American, by name Paton Jeffries. He was from New England, and, +I think, a native of the State of Connecticut; his father, he told me, +was a distinguished inventor, who had made and lost a considerable +fortune in devising a means of promoting sleep by electricity. Paton +was studying to be an architect, which, he said, was the coming +profession in his country; and it was evident, on a short acquaintance, +that he was a fellow of unusual talents--one of those men of whom you +say that, come what may, they are always sure to fall on their feet. +For my part, I have certainly never met with so active and versatile a +spirit. He was a year or so older than I, rather tall than short, +lightly but strongly built, with a keen, smiling, subtle face, a +finely-developed forehead, light wavy hair, and gray eyes, very +penetrating and bright. There was a pleasing kind of eagerness and +volubility in his manner of talking, and a slight imperfection, not +amounting to a lisp, in his utterance, which imparted a naive charm to +his speech. He used expressive and rapid gestures with his hands and +arms, and there was a magnetism, a fascination, about the whole man +that strongly impressed me. I was at that period much more susceptible +of impressions, and prone to yield to them, than I am now. Paton's +rattling vivacity, his knowledge of the world, his entertaining talk +and stories, his curiosity, enterprise, and audacity, took me by storm; +he was my opposite in temperament and character, and it seemed to me +that he had most of the advantages on his side. Nevertheless, he +professed, and I still believe he felt, a great liking for me, and we +speedily came to an agreement to seek a lodging together. On the second +day of our search, we found just what we wanted. + +It was an old house, on the outskirts of the town, standing by itself, +with a small garden behind it. It had formerly been occupied by an +Austrian baron, and it was probably not less than two hundred years +old. The baron's family had died out, or been dispersed, and now the +venerable edifice was let, in the German fashion, in separate floors or +_étages_, communicating with a central staircase. Some alterations +rendered necessary by this modification had been made, but +substantially the house was unchanged. Our apartment comprised four or +five rooms on the left of the landing and at the top of the house, +which consisted of three stories. The chief room was the parlor, which +looked down through a square bow-window on the street. This room was of +irregular shape, one end being narrower than the other, and nearly +fitting the space at this end was a kind of projecting shelf or +mantelpiece (only, of course, there was no fireplace under it, open +fireplaces being unknown in Germany), upon which rested an old cracked +looking-glass, made in two compartments, the frame of which, black with +age and fly-spots, was fastened against the wall. The shelf was +supported by two pilasters; but the object of the whole structure was a +mystery; so far as appeared, it served no purpose but to support the +looking-glass, which might just as well have been suspended from a nail +in the wall. Paton, I remember, betrayed a great deal of curiosity +about it; and since the consideration of the problem was more in his +line of business than in mine, I left it to him. At the opposite end of +the room stood a tall earthenware stove. The walls were wainscoted five +feet up from the dark polished floor, and were hung with several smoky +old paintings, of no great artistic value. The chairs and tables were +plain, but very heavy and solid, and of a dark hue like the room. The +window was nearly as wide as it was high, and opened laterally from the +center on hinges. The other rooms were of the same general appearance, +but smaller. We both liked the place, and soon made ourselves very +comfortable in it. I hired a piano, and had it conveyed upstairs to the +parlor; while Paton disposed his architectural paraphernalia on and in +the massive writing-table near the window. Our cooking and other +household duties were done for us by the wife of the _portier_, +the official corresponding to the French _concierge_, who, in all +German houses, attends at the common door, and who, in this case, lived +in a couple of musty little closets opening into the lower hall, and +eked out his official salary by cobbling shoes. He was an odd, +grotesque humorist, of most ungainly exterior, black haired and +bearded, with a squint, a squab nose, and a short but very powerful +figure. Dirty he was beyond belief, and he was abominably fragrant of +vile tobacco. For my part, I could not endure this fellow; but Paton, +who had much more of what he called human nature in him than I had, +established friendly relations with him at once, and reported that he +found him very amusing. It was characteristic of Paton that, though he +knew much less about the German language than I did, he could +understand and make himself understood in it much better; and, when we +were in company, it was always he who did the talking. + +It would never have occurred to me to wonder, much less to inquire, who +might be the occupants of the other _étages_; but Paton was more +enterprising, and before we had been settled three days in our new +quarters, he had gathered from his friend the portier, and from other +sources, all the obtainable information on the subject. The information +was of no particular interest, however, except as regarded the persons +who dwelt on the floor immediately below us. They were two--an old man +and a young woman, supposed to be his daughter. They had been living +here several years--from before the time, indeed, that the portier had +occupied his present position. In all these years the old man was known +to have been out of his room only twice. He was certainly an eccentric +person, and was said to be a miser and extremely wealthy. The portier +further averred that his property--except such small portion of it as +was invested and on the income of which he lived--was realized in the +form of diamonds and other precious stones, which, for greater +security, he always carried, waking or sleeping, in a small leathern +bag, fastened round his neck by a fine steel chain. His daughter was +scarcely less a mystery than he, for, though she went out as often as +twice or thrice a week, she was always closely veiled, and her figure +was so disguised by the long cloak she wore that it was impossible to +say whether she were graceful or deformed, beautiful or ugly. The +balance of belief, however, was against her being attractive in any +respect. The name by which the old miser was known was Kragendorf; but, +as the portier sagaciously remarked, there was no knowing, in such +cases, whether the name a man bore was his own or somebody's else. + +This Kragendorf mystery was another source of apparently inexhaustible +interest to Paton, who was fertile in suggestions as to how it might be +explained or penetrated. I believe he and the portier talked it over at +great length, but, so far as I am aware, without arriving at any +solution. I took little heed of the matter, being now fully absorbed in +my studies; and it is to be hoped that Herr Kragendorf was not of a +nervous temperament, otherwise he must have inveighed profanely against +the constant piano-practice that went on over his head. I also had a +violin, on which I flattered myself I could perform with a good deal of +expression, and by and by, in the long, still evenings--it was +November, but the temperature was still mild--I got into the habit of +strolling along the less frequented streets, with my violin under my +shoulder, drawing from it whatever music my heart desired. Occasionally +I would pause at some convenient spot, lean against a wall, and give +myself up to improvisation. At such times a little cluster of auditors +would gradually collect in front of me, listening for the most part +silently, or occasionally giving vent to low grunts and interjections +of approval. One evening, I remember, a young woman joined the group, +though keeping somewhat in the background; she listened intently, and +after a time gradually turned her face toward me, unconsciously as it +were; and the light of a street-lamp at a little distance revealed a +countenance youthful, pale, sad, and exquisitely beautiful. It +impressed me as with a vague reminiscence of something I had seen or +imagined--some pictured face, perhaps, caught in a glance and never to +be identified. Her eyes finally met mine; I stopped playing. She +started, gave me an alarmed look, and, gliding swiftly away, +disappeared. I could not forget this incident; it haunted me strangely +and persistently. Many a time thereafter I revisited the same spot, and +drew together other audiences, but the delicate girl with the dark-blue +eyes and the tender, sensitive mouth, was never again among them. + +It was at this epoch, I think, that the inexhaustible Paton made a +discovery. From my point of view it was not a discovery of any moment; +but, as usual, he took interest in it enough for both of us. It +appeared that, in attempting to doctor the crack in the old looking- +glass, a large piece of the plate had got loose, and come away in his +hands; and in the space behind he had detected a paper, carefully +folded and tied up with a piece of faded ribbon. Paton was never in the +habit of hampering himself with fine-drawn scruples, and he had no +hesitation in opening the folded paper and spreading it out on the +table. Judging from the glance I gave it, it seemed to be a confused +and abstruse mixture of irregular geometrical figures and cramped +German chirography. But Paton set to work upon it with as much +concentration as if it had been a recipe for the Philosopher's Stone; +he reproduced the lines and angles on fresh paper, and labored over the +writing with a magnifying-glass and a dictionary. At times he would +mutter indistinctly to himself, lift his eyebrows, nod or shake his +head, bite his lips, and rub his forehead, and anon fall to work again +with fresh vigor. At last he leaned back in his chair, thumped his hand +on the table, and laughed. + +"Got it!" he exclaimed. "Say, John, old boy, I've got it! and it's the +most curious old thing ever you saw in your life!" + +"Something in analytical geometry, isn't it?" said I, turning round on +my piano-stool. + +"Analytical pudding's end! It's a plan of a house, my boy, and, what's +more, of this very house we're in! That's a find, and no mistake! These +are the descriptions and explanations--these bits of writing. It's a +perfect labyrinth of Crete! Udolpho was nothing to it!" + +"Well, I suppose it isn't of much value except as a curiosity?" + +"Don't be too sure of that, John, my boy! Who knows but there's a +treasure concealed somewhere in this house? or a skeleton in a secret +chamber! This old paper may make our fortune yet!" + +"The treasure wouldn't belong to us if we found it; and, besides, we +can't make explorations beyond our own premises, and we know what's in +them already." + +"Do we? Did we know what was behind the looking-glass? Did you never +hear of sliding panels, and private passages, and concealed staircases? +Where's your imagination, man? But you don't need imagination--here it +is in black and white!" + +As he spoke, he pointed to a part of the plan; but, as I was stooping +to examine it, he seemed to change his mind. + +"No matter," he exclaimed, suddenly folding up the paper and rising +from his chair. "You're not an architect, and you can't be expected to +go in for these things. No; there's no practical use in it, of course. +But secret passages were always a hobby of mine. Well, what are you +going to do this evening? Come over to the café and have a game of +billiards!" + +"No; I shall go to bed early to-night." + +"You sleep too much," said Paton. "Everybody does, if my father, +instead of inventing a way of promoting sleep, had invented a way of +doing without it, he'd have been the richest man in America to-day. +However, do as you like. I sha'n't be back till late." + +He put on his hat and sallied forth with a cigar in his mouth. Paton +was of rather a convivial turn; he liked to have a good time, as he +called it; and, indeed, he seemed to think that the chief end of man +was to get money enough to have a good time continually, a sort of good +eternity. His head was strong, and he could stand a great deal of +liquor; and I have seen him sip and savor a glass of raw brandy or +whisky as another man would a glass of Madeira. In this, and the other +phases of his life about town, I had no participation, being +constitutionally as well as by training averse therefrom; and he, on +the other hand, would never have listened to my sage advice to modify +his loose habits. Our companionship was apart from these things; and, +as I have said, I found in him a good deal that I could sympathize +with, without approaching the moralities. + +That night, after I had been for some time asleep, I awoke and found +myself listening to a scratching and shoving noise that seemed quite +unaccountable. By-and-by it made me uneasy. I got up and went toward +the parlor, from which the noise proceeded. On reaching the doorway, I +saw Paton on his knees before one of the pilasters in the narrow end of +the room; a candle was on the floor beside him, and he was busily at +work at something, though what it was I could not make out. The creak +of the threshold under my foot caused him to look round. He started +violently, and sprang to his feet. + +"Oh! it's you, is it?" he said, after a moment. "Great Scott! how you +scared me! I was--I dropped a bit of money hereabouts, and I was +scraping about to find it. No matter--it wasn't much! Sorry I disturbed +you, old boy." And, laughing, he picked up his candle and went into his +own room. + +From this time there was a change vaguely perceptible in our mutual +relations; we chatted together less than before, and did not see so +much of each other. Paton was apt to be out when I was at home, and +generally sat up after I was abed. He seemed to be busy about +something--something connected with his profession, I judged; but, +contrary to his former custom, he made no attempt to interest me in it. +To tell the truth, I had begun to realize that our different tastes and +pursuits must lead us further and further apart, and that our +separation could be only a question of time. Paton was a materialist, +and inclined to challenge all the laws and convictions that mankind has +instituted and adopted; there was no limit to his radicalism. For +example, on coming in one day, I found him with a curious antique +poniard in his hands, which he had probably bought in some old +curiosity shop. At first I fancied he meant to conceal it; but, if so, +he changed his mind. + +"What do you think of that?" he said, holding it out to me. "There's a +solution of continuity for you! Mind you don't prick yourself! It's +poisoned up to the hilt!" + +"What do you want of such a thing?" I asked. + +"Well, killing began with Cain, and isn't likely to go out of fashion +in our day. I might find it convenient to give one of my friends--you, +for instance--a reminder of his mortality some time. You'll say murder +is immoral. Bless you, man, we never could do without it! No man dies +before his time, and some one dies every day that some one else may +live." + +This was said in a jocose way, and, of course, Paton did not mean it. +But it affected me unpleasantly nevertheless. + +As I was washing my hands in my room, I happened to look out of my +window, which commanded a view of the garden at the back of the house. +It was an hour after sunset, and the garden was nearly dark; but I +caught a movement of something below, and, looking more closely, I +recognized the ugly figure of the portier. He seemed to be tying +something to the end of a long slender pole, like a gigantic fishing- +rod; and presently he advanced beneath my window, and raised the pole +as high as it would go against the wall of the house. The point he +touched was the sill of the window below mine--probably that of the +bedroom of Herr Kragendorf. At this juncture the portier seemed to be +startled at something--possibly he saw me at my window; at all events, +he lowered his pole and disappeared in the house. + +The next day Paton made an announcement that took me by surprise. He +said he had made up his mind to quit Germany, and that very shortly. He +mentioned having received letters from home, and declared he had got, +or should soon have got, all he wanted out of this country. "I'm going +to stop paying money for instruction," he said, "and begin to earn it +by work. I shall stay another week, but then I'm off. Too slow here for +me! I want to be in the midst of things, using my time." + +I did not attempt to dissuade him; in fact, my first feeling was rather +one of relief; and this Paton, with his quick preceptions, was probably +aware of. + +"Own up, old boy!" he said, laughing; "you'll be able to endure my +absence. And yet you needn't think of me as worse than anybody else. If +everybody were musicians and moralists, it would be nice, no doubt; but +one might get tired of it in time, and then what would you do? You must +give the scamps and adventurers their innings, after all! They may not +do much good, but they give the other fellows occupation. I was born +without my leave being asked, and I may act as suits me without asking +anybody's leave." + +This was said on a certain bright morning after our first fall of snow; +the tiled roofs of the houses were whitened with it, it cushioned the +window-sills, and spread a sparkling blankness over the garden. In the +streets it was already melting, and people were slipping and splashing +on the wet and glistening pavements. After gazing out at this scene for +a while, in a mood of unwonted thoughtfulness, Paton yawned, stretched +himself, and declared his intention of taking a stroll before dinner. +Accordingly he lit a cigar and went forth. I watched him go down the +street and turn the corner. + +An hour afterward, just when dinner was on the table, I heard an +unusual noise and shuffling on the stairs, and a heavy knock on the +door. I opened it, and saw four men bearing on a pallet the form of my +friend Paton. A police officer accompanied them. They brought Paton in, +and laid him on his bed. The officer told me briefly what had happened, +gave me certain directions, and, saying that a surgeon would arrive +immediately, he departed with the four men tramping behind him. + +Paton had slipped in going across the street, and a tramway car had run +over him. He was not dead, though almost speechless; but his injuries +were such that it was impossible that he should recover. He kept his +eyes upon me; they were as bright as ever, though his face was deadly +pale. He seemed to be trying to read my thoughts--to find out my +feeling about him, and my opinion of his condition. I was terribly +shocked and grieved, and my face no doubt showed it. By-and-by I saw +his lips move, and bent down to listen. + +"Confounded nuisance!" he whispered faintly in my car. "It's all right, +though; I'm not going to die this time. I've got something to do, and +I'm going to do it--devil take me if I don't!" + +He was unable to say more, and soon after the surgeon came in. He made +an examination, and it was evident that he had no hope. His shrug of +the shoulders was not lost upon Paton, who frowned, and made a defiant +movement of the lip. But presently he said to me, still in the same +whisper, "John, if that old fool should be right--he won't be, but in +case of accidents--you must take charge of my things--the papers, and +all. I'll make you heir of my expectations! Write out a declaration to +that effect: I can sign my name; and he'll be witness." + +I did as he directed, and having explained to the surgeon the nature of +the document, I put the pen in Paton's hand; but was obliged to guide +his hand with my own in order to make an intelligible signature. The +surgeon signed below, and Paton seemed satisfied. He closed his eyes; +his sufferings appeared to be very slight. But, even while I was +looking at him, a change came over his face--a deadly change. His eyes +opened; they were no longer bright, but sunken and dull. He gave me a +dusky look--whether of rage, of fear, or of entreaty, I could not tell. +His lips parted, and a voice made itself audible; not like his own +voice, but husky and discordant. "I'm going," it said. "But look out +for me.... Do it yourself!" + +"Der Herr ist todt" (the man is dead), said the surgeon the next +minute. + +It was true. Paton had gone out of this life at an hour's warning. What +purpose or desire his last words indicated, there was nothing to show. +He was dead; and yet I could hardly believe that it was so. He had been +so much alive; so full of schemes and enterprises. Nothing now was left +but that crushed and haggard figure, stiffening on the bed; nothing, at +least, that mortal senses could take cognizance of. It was a strange +thought. + +Paton's funeral took place a few days afterward. I returned from the +graveyard weary in body and mind. At the door of the house stood the +portier, who nodded to me, and said, + +"A very sad thing to happen, worthy sir; but so it is in the world. Of +all the occupants of this house, one would have said the one least +likely to be dead to-day was Herr Jeffries. Heh! if I had been the good +Providence, I would have made away with the old gentleman of the +_étage_ below, who is of no use to anybody." + +This, for lack of a better, was Paton's funeral oration. I climbed the +three flights of stairs and let myself into our apartment--mine +exclusively now. The place was terribly lonely; much more so than if +Paton had been alive anywhere in the world. But he was dead; and, if +his own philosophy were true, he was annihilated. But it was not true! +How distinct and minute was my recollection of him--his look, his +gestures, the tones of his voice. I could almost see him before me; my +memory of him dead seemed clearer than when he was alive. In that +invisible world of the mind was he not living still, and perhaps not +far away. + +I sat down at the table where he had been wont to work, and unlocked +the drawers in which he kept his papers. These, or some of them, I took +out and spread before me. But I found it impossible, as yet, to +concentrate my attention upon them; I pushed back my chair, and, +rising, went to the piano. Here I remained for perhaps a couple of +hours, striking the vague chords that echo wandering thoughts. I was +trying to banish this haunting image of Paton from my mind, and at +length I partly succeeded. + +All at once, however, the impression of him (as I may call it) came +back with a force and vividness that startled me. I stopped playing, +and sat for a minute perfectly still. I felt that Paton was in the +room; that if I looked round I should see him. I however restrained +myself from looking round with all the strength of my will--wherefore I +know not. What I felt was not fear, but the conviction that I was on +the brink of a fearful and unprecedented experience--an experience +that would not leave me as it found me. This strange struggle with +myself taxed all my powers; the sweat started out on my forehead. At +last the moment came when I could struggle no longer. I laid my hand on +the keyboard, and pushed myself round on the stool. There was a +momentary dazzle before my eyes, and after that I saw plainly. My hand, +striking the keys, had produced a jarring discord; and while this was +yet tingling in my ears, Paton, who was sitting in his old place at the +table, with his back toward me, faced about in his chair, and his eyes +met mine. I thought he smiled. + +My excitement was past, and was succeeded by a dead calm. I examined +him critically. His appearance was much the same as when in life; nay, +he was even more like himself than before. The subtle or crafty +expression which had always been discernible in his features was now +intensified, and there was something wild and covertly fierce in the +shining of his gray eyes, something that his smile was unable to +disguise. What was human and genial in my former friend had passed +away, and what remained was evil--the kind of evil that I now perceived +to have been at the base of his nature. It was a revelation of +character terrible in its naked completeness. I knew at a glance that +Paton must always have been a far more wicked man that I had ever +imagined; and in his present state all the remains of goodness had been +stripped away, and nothing but wickedness was left. + +I felt impelled, by an impulse for which I could not account, to +approach the table and examine the papers once more; and now it entered +into my mind to perceive a certain method and meaning in them that had +been hidden from me before. It was as though I were looking at them +through Paton's intelligence, and with his memory. He had in some way +ceased to be visible to me; but I became aware that he wished me to sit +down in his chair, and I did so. Under his guidance, and in obedience +to a will that seemed to be my own, and yet was in direct opposition to +my real will, I began a systematic study of the papers. Paton, +meanwhile, remained close to me, though I could no longer see him; but +I felt the gaze of his fierce, shining eyes, and his crafty, evil +smile. I soon obtained a tolerable insight into what the papers meant, +and what was the scheme in which Paton had been so much absorbed at the +time of his death, and which he had been so loath to abandon. + +It was a wicked and cruel scheme, worked out to the smallest +particular. But, though I understood its hideousness intellectually, it +aroused in mo no corresponding emotion; my sensitiveness to right arid +wrong seemed stupefied or inoperative. I could say, "This is wicked," +but I could not awaken in myself a horror of committing the wickedness; +and, moreover, I knew that, if the influence Paton was able to exercise +over me continued, I must in due time commit it. + +Presently I became aware, or, to speak more accurately, I seemed to +remember, that there was something in Paton's room which it was +incumbent on me to procure. I went thither, lifted up a corner of the +rag between the bed and the stove, and beheld, in an aperture in the +floor, of the existence of which I had till now known nothing, the +antique poisoned dagger that Paton had showed me a few weeks before, +and which I had not seen since then. I brought it back to the sitting- +room, put it in a drawer of the table, and locked the drawer, at the +same time making a mental note to the effect that I should reopen the +drawer at a certain hour of the night and take the dagger out. All this +while Paton was close at hand, though not visible to sight; but I had a +sort of inner perception of his presence and movements. All at once, at +about the hour of sunset, I saw him again; he moved toward the looking- +glass at the narrow end of the room, laid his hand upon one of the +pilasters, glanced at me over his shoulder, and immediately seemed to +stoop down. As I sat, the edge of the table hid him from sight. I stood +up and looked across. He was not there; and a kind of reaction of my +nerves informed me that he was gone absolutely, for the time. + +This reaction produced a lassitude impossible to describe; it was +overpowering, and I had no choice but to yield to it. I dropped back in +my chair, leaned forward on the table, and instantly fell into a heavy +sleep, or stupor. + +I awoke abruptly, with a sensation as if a hand had been laid on my +shoulder. It was night, and I knew that the hour I had noted in my mind +was at hand. I opened the drawer and took out the dagger, which I put +in my pocket. The house was quite silent. A shiver passed through me. I +was aware that Paton was standing at the narrow end of the room, +waiting for me: Yes--there he was, or the impression of him in my +brain--what did it matter? I arose mechanically and walked toward him. +He had no need to direct me: I knew all there was to do, and how to do +it. I knelt on the floor, laid my shoulder against the pilaster, and +pushed it laterally. It moved aside on a pivot, disclosing an iron ring +let into the floor. I laid hold of this ring, and lifted. A section of +the floor came up, and I saw a sort of ladder descending +perpendicularly into darkness. Down the ladder Paton went, and I +followed him. Arrived at the bottom, I turned to the left, led by an +instinct or a fascination; passed along a passage barely wide enough to +admit me, until I came against a smooth, hard surface. I passed my hand +over it until I touched a knob or catch, which I pressed, and the +surface gave way before me like a door. I stumbled forward, and found +myself in a room of what was doubtless Herr Kragendorf's apartment. A +keen, cold air smote against my face; and with it came a sudden influx +of strength and self-possession. I felt that, for a moment at least, +the fatal influence of Paton upon me was broken. But what was that +sound of a struggle--those cries and gasps, that seemed to come from an +adjoining room? + +I sprang forward, opened a door, and beheld a tall old man, with white +hair and beard, in the grasp of a ruffian whom I at once recognized as +the portier. A broken window showed how he had effected his entrance. +One hand held the old man by the throat; in the other was a knife, +which he was prevented from using by a young woman, who had flung +herself upon him in such a way as to trammel his movements. In another +moment, however, he would have shaken her off. + +But that moment was not allowed him. I seized him with a strength that +amazed myself--a strength which never came upon me before or since. The +conflict lasted but a breath or two; I hurled him to the floor, and, as +he fell, his right arm was doubled under him, and the knife which he +held entered his back beneath the left shoulder-blade. When I rose up +from the whirl and fury of the struggle, I saw the old man reclining +exhausted on the bosom of the girl. I knew him, despite his white hair +and beard. And the face that bent so lovingly above him was the face +that had looked into mine that night on the street--the face of the +blue-eyed maiden--of a younger and a lovelier Juliet! As I gazed, there +came a thundering summons at the door, and the police entered. + + * * * * * + +My poor uncle Körner had not prospered after his great stroke of +roguery. His wife had died of a broken heart, after giving birth to a +daughter, and his stolen riches had vanished almost as rapidly as they +were acquired. He had at last settled down with his daughter in this +old house. The treasure in the leathern bag, though a treasure to him, +was not of a nature to excite general cupidity. It consisted, not of +precious stones, but of relics of his dead wife--her rings, a lock of +her hair, her letters, a miniature of her in a gold case. These poor +keepsakes, and his daughter, had been the only solace of his lonely and +remorseful life. + +It was uncertain whether Paton and the portier had planned the robbery +together, or separately, and in ignorance of each other's purpose. Nor +can I tell whether my disembodied visitor came to me with good or with +evil intent. Wicked spirits, even when they seem to have power to carry +out their purposes, are perhaps only permitted to do so, so far as is +consistent with an overruling good of which they know nothing. +Certainly, if I had not descended the secret passage, Körner would have +been killed, and perhaps my Juliet likewise--the mother of my children. +But should I have been led on to stab him myself, with the poisoned +dagger, had the portier not been there? Juliet smiles and says No, and +I am glad to agree with her. But I have never since then found that +anniversary upon me, without a shudder of awe, and a dark thought of +Paton Jeffries. + + + + +THE END. + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of David Poindexter's Disappearance and +Other Tales, by Julian Hawthorne + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK POINDEXTER'S DISAPPEARANCE *** + +This file should be named 8dpdp10.txt or 8dpdp10.zip +Corrected EDITIONS of our eBooks get a new NUMBER, 8dpdp11.txt +VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, 8dpdp10a.txt + +This eBook was produced by Michelle Shephard, Eric Eldred, +Charles Franks and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team + +Project Gutenberg eBooks are often created from several printed +editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the US +unless a copyright notice is included. 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