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diff --git a/21095.txt b/21095.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..8e63a5b --- /dev/null +++ b/21095.txt @@ -0,0 +1,6389 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of She and I, Volume 1, by John Conroy Hutcheson + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: She and I, Volume 1 + +Author: John Conroy Hutcheson + +Release Date: April 16, 2007 [EBook #21095] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SHE AND I, VOLUME 1 *** + + + + +Produced by Nick Hodson of London, England + + + + + +She and I - Volume 1 + +by John Conroy Hutcheson +________________________________________________________________ +The setting is a dull suburb in London, just after the middle of the +nineteenth century. The hero spots a very pretty young lady in church, +and falls in love with her. The first problem is to get an +introduction. He manages this, but the girl's mother, with an eye to +the long-term, knows that our hero is not well-off, while others, who we +can see are not the sort of person the girl would like to marry, are. +Various parties and expeditions involving the church's congregation take +place, and eventually the wooing of the young lady appears successful. + +The book is altogether in a different style to Hutcheson's later works, +which are mostly nautical. Possibly a period of twenty years separates +this book from the later ones. Certainly this book has about it, at +times, a feeling of the experimental, particularly in the use of certain +words, which one feels Hutcheson may have thought up, and which have not +"caught on." Another symptom is the use of unusual hyphenated words, +and an over-use of common ones. There are also several quotations from +poetry, which one does not mind while they are in English, or perhaps +French, but which get a bit tedious when they are in other languages. I +particularly dislike this habit when one of these foreign poems is used +at the start of the chapter. Couldn't a good translation have done just +as well? +________________________________________________________________ +SHE AND I - VOLUME ONE + +BY JOHN CONROY HUTCHESON + + +CHAPTER ONE. + +AT FIRST SIGHT. + + "I muse, as in a trance, when e'er + The languors of thy love-deep eyes + Float on me. I would I were + So tranced, so wrapt in ecstasies, + To stand apart, and to adore, + Gazing on thee for evermore!" + +I saw her first in church. + +Do you happen to know a quaint, dreamy old region in the west of London, +which bricks and mortar have not, as yet, overtaken, nor newfangled +villas vulgarised? + +A region of innumerable market gardens that are principally laid out in +long, narrow beds, lost into nothingness as they dwindle down in the dim +vista of perspective, and which are planted with curly endive, piquante- +looking lettuces, and early cabbages; squat rows of gooseberry bushes +and currant trees, with a rose set here and there in between; and sweet- +smelling, besides, of hidden violets and honeysuckles, and the pink and +white hawthorn of the hedges in May:-- + +A region of country lanes, ever winding and seemingly never ending, +leading down to and past and from the whilom silent, whilom bustling +river, that never heeds their tortuous intricacies, but hurries by on +its way through the busy city towards the sea below; lanes wherein are +to be occasionally met with curious old stone houses, of almost +historical antecedents and dreamy as the region in which they lie, +scattered about in the queerest situations without plan or precedent, on +which the casual pedestrian comes when he least expects:-- + +Do you know this quaint old region, this fleeting oasis in the Sahara of +the building-mad suburban metropolis? I do, well; its market gardens, +its circumambient lanes, its old, antiquarian stone houses, and all! + +Many a time have I wandered through them; many a time watched the heavy +waggons as they went creaking on their way to town and the great +emporium at Covent Garden, groaning beneath the wealth and weight of the +vegetable produce they carried, and laden so high with cunningly- +arranged nests of baskets on baskets, that one believed each moment that +they would topple over, and held the breath for fear of hastening their +fall; many a time sought to trace each curving lane to its probable +goal, or tried to hunt out the hidden histories which lay concealed +within the crumbling walls of the old dwellings on which I might happen +to light in my walks. + +But my favourite ramble, eclipsing all others now in pleasant +recollections of by-gone days, was through the Prebend's Walk, bordered +with its noble grove of stately lime trees and oaks and elms on either +hand; and passing by open fields, that are, in spring, rich with yellow +buttercups and star-spangled daisies, and, in summer, ripe with the +aromatic odours of new-mown hay. + +The Prebend's Walk, beyond where the lime-grove ends, whence the +prebend's residence can be faintly distinguished through the clustering +masses of tree-foliage, merges into the open, commanding the river in +front; but it is still marked out by a stray elm or horse-chestnut, +placed at scanty intervals, to keep up the idea of the ancient avenue +beyond. + +Here, turning to the right and crossing a piece of unkempt land, half +copse, half meadow, the scene again changed. + +You came to a stile. That surmounted and left behind, a narrow by-path +led you through its twisting turns until you reached a tiny, rustic +stone bridge--such a tiny, little bridge! This was over the sluice and +aqueduct from the adjacent river, which supplied the fosse that in olden +times surrounded the prebend's residence, when there were such things as +sieges and besiegements in this fair land of ours. + +The prebend's residence was then a castle, protected, probably, by +battlements and mantlets and turreted walls, and with its keep and its +drawbridge, its postern and its fosse--simple works of defence that were +armed for retaliation, with catapult and mangonel, the canon raye of the +period, besides arquebuse and other hand weapons wielded, no doubt, by +mighty men at arms, mail-clad and helmeted, who knew how to give and +take with the best of them; now, it was but a peaceful priest's +dwelling, inhabited by as true a clergyman and gentleman as ever lived, +although it was still a fine old house. + +As for the fosse, it sank long ages ago to the level and capacity of a +common ditch, and was almost hidden from view by the overhanging boughs +and branches of the park trees on the opposite side, and the half- +decayed trunks of former monarchs of the forest that filled its bed--a +ditch covered with a superstratum of slimy, green water, lank weeds, and +rank vegetation; and wherein, at flood time, urchin anglers could fish +for eels and sticklebats, and, at ebb, the village ducks disport +themselves and mudlarks play. + +Along this fosse, the path continued. Further on, it widened into a +broader way, which led you direct to the churchyard of Saint Canon's. +So studded is it with weatherworn tombstones, inclining at all angles +like so many miniature leaning towers of Pisa, ivy-wreathed obelisks and +quaintly-fashioned, railed-in monuments, that you can scarcely make out +the lower buttresses of the ancient church that stands up from amongst +their midst. + +With its whitish-grey walls, time-stained and rain-eaten, its severe- +looking, square Norman tower, and its generally-formal style of +architecture, that edifice does not present a very imposing appearance +from without; but, within, the case is different. + +Lofty, pointed, stained-glass windows light it. The chancel bears the +stamp of the Restoration. Oaken beams; carved galleries, curiously +contrived to fit into every available space; high, upright box pews--of +the sort instituted, in the reign of Anne, by the renowned Bishop +Burnett to restrain the roving eyes of the congregation and make +gallants better attend to their devotions; all these, in addition to the +memorial slabs and tablets, and weeping angels over cinereal urns, tend +to give the church that air of ugliness and comfort which the modern +churchman detests. + +Dear old church! + +I love its old walls, its old chancel, its old pews, its form of +worship, and all; for it was there that I first saw her,--my own, my +darling! + +O, Min, Min! can I ever forget that time? + +Can I! + +One Sunday--it is not so long ago that my hair is grey, nor so recently +as to prevent my having a story to tell--I was in Saint Canon's church, +sitting in one of its old, square box pews, where one was, as it were, +shut up in a small, private house, away from all connection with the +outer world; for you could not see anything when the door was closed, +with the exception of the roof overhead, and, mayhap, the walls around. +I was listening to the varied fugue introitus that the organist was +playing from the gallery beyond the pulpit,--playing with the full wind +power of the venerable reed instrument he skilfully manipulated, having +all the stops out,--diapasons, trumpet, vox humana, and the rest. The +music was from Handel, a composer of whom the maestro was especially +fond; so fond, indeed, that any of the congregation who might have the +like musical proclivities need seldom fear disappointment. They could +reckon upon hearing the Hallelujah Chorus at least once a fortnight, and +the lesser morceaux of _Israel in Egypt_ at intervals in between. + +Presently, just before the vicar and curate made their customary +processional entry, ere the service began, two ladies were ushered into +the large pew which I occupied alone in solitary state. There was room +enough, in all conscience. It could have accommodated a round dozen, +and that without any squeezing. + +Both the ladies were dressed in half-mourning, which attracted my +attention and made me observe them more closely than I might otherwise +have done. My mind was soon engaged wondering, as one is apt to do-- +when in church, more particularly--who and what they were. One, I saw, +was middle-aged: the other had not, probably, as yet reached her +eighteenth year; and what a charming face she had,--what an expression! + +I could not take my eyes off her. + +How shall I describe her? I had ample opportunity of taking a study, as +she faced me on the opposite side of the pew, seated beside the other +and elder lady, who, I could see at a glance, was her mother, from the +striking likeness between them--although, there was a wonderful +difference the while. + +Have you never observed the slight, yet unmistakable traits of family +resemblance, and the various points in which they are displayed? They +may sometimes be only traceable in a single feature, a smile, a look, or +in some peculiar mannerism of speech, or action, or even thought; but +there they are; and, however indistinct they may be, however faint on +casual inspection, a practised eye can seldom fail to perceive them and +distinguish the relationship betwixt father and son, or mother and +daughter:--the kinship of brothers and sisters is not so evident to +strangers. In the present case no one could doubt: the younger lady +must certainly be the daughter of the other. + +But, what was she like, you ask? + +Well, she was not beautiful. She was not even what empty-headed people, +unaware of the real signification of the term, call "pretty." She was +interesting--will that word suit? + +No. The description would not give you the least idea of what her face +really was like--much less of her expression, in which consisted its +great charm. + +Shall I endeavour to picture her to you as I saw her for that first time +in church, before Love's busy fingers had woven a halo of romance around +her, only allowing me to behold her through a sort of fairy glamour; and +making me forget everything concerning her, save that she was "Min," and +that I loved her, and that she was the darling of my heart? + +I will. + +Her figure seemed to me then a trifle below the middle height, but so +well-proportioned that one could not easily tell, unless standing beside +her, whether she was actually short or tall. Her features were Grecian +in outline, as regarded the upper portion of her face, and irregular +below; with such a delightful little dimple in her curving chin, and +full, pouting lips. Her eyes, calm, steady, quiet, loving, grey eyes,-- +eyes symbolical of faith and constancy, and unswerving fidelity of +purpose: eyes that looked like tranquil depths through which you could +see the soul-light reflected from below; and which only wanted the +stirring power of some great motive or passion to illumine them with a +myriad irradiating gems. + +But,--pshaw! How can I describe her? It is sacrilege thus to weigh and +consider the points and merits of one we love. Besides, even the most +perfect and faultlessly-beautiful face in the world would be unable to +stand the test of minute examination in detail. As Thomson sings, to +put his poetry into prose, how can you "from the diamond single out each +ray, when all, though trembling with ten thousand hues, effuse one +dazzling undivided light?" + +It is impossible. No words of mine could put before you what her face +really was like, as it appeared to me then and afterwards when I had +learnt to watch and decipher every versatile look and expression it +wore. Sometimes, when in repose, it reminded me of one of Raphael's +angels. At other times, when moved by mirth and with arch glances +dancing in the deep, grey eyes,--and they could make merry when they +willed,--it was a witching, teasing, provoking little face. Or, again, +if changed by grief,--under which aspect, thank God! I seldom saw it,-- +a noble, resolute face, bearing that indescribable look of calm, set, +high resolve, which the face of the heart-broken daughter of Lear, or +the deep-suffering mother of the Gracchi might have borne. You may say, +perhaps, that this is rhapsody; but what is love without rhapsody?-- +what, a love story? + +I determined at first, before I had studied it more attentively, that +her face lacked expression; but I made a grievous error. I quickly +altered my opinion on seeing it in profile and upturned; for I marked +the embodiment of devotion it betrayed during the service, when her +voice was raised in the praise of her Maker. She looked now exactly +like the picture of Saint Cecilia; and her appearance recalled to my +mind what one of the American essayists, I forget who it is, observes +quaintly somewhere, that it is no wonder that Catholics pay their vows +to the queen of heaven, for "the unpoetical side of Protestantism is, +that it has no woman to be worshipped." + +Of course I had fallen in love with her,--love at first sight; and, +although you may not credit the assertion, allow me to put you right +upon the point and inform you that such a thing is not only possible, +but much more probable, and of more frequent occurrence than a good many +people imagine or believe. Love is sometimes the growth of degrees: it +may also bound into existence in a moment; for there is a certain +sympathetic attraction between some persons, as there is between others +an antipathetical, repulsive force. Understand, passion is not here +alluded to. That is, of the senses. What I mean is, the essence or +spirit of love, as pure as that which may subsist amongst the angels +above. + +I felt such love growing within me, as I looked at her, with her +downcast eyes bent over her Bible, or as she sat, with head upraised and +attentive ear, drinking in the words of spiritual wisdom addressed us by +our good old pastor, of which at the time _I_ took but little heed. She +did not seem at all conscious that she was being observed; although she +doubtless knew that I was looking at her, in that instinctive way common +to her sex, in which they manage to take cognisance of everything going +on around them, without so much as raising an eyelid. Indeed, she told +me afterwards that she had been well aware of my watch, and added that +she thought me "very rude, too;" but, just now, she took no notice of my +looks and longings, as far as I could see. + +It was not until the close of the service, and when she and her mother +were leaving the pew, that I obtained a glance, a look, which dwelt in +my memory for days and days. She had brought with her into church a +tiny spray of mignonette, and this she left behind her on the seat close +to where she had been sitting. I perceived it, and taking it up, made +as if to restore it to its lawful owner. + +A half smile faintly played across her slightly parted lips, as she +looked at me for an instant, an amused sparkle in her clear, grey eyes, +and then turned away with a polite inclination and shake of her little +head, in refusal of the mignonette, which I have kept ever since. But +that smile! + +Her whole face lit up, gaining just the colour and expression which it +appeared to lack. My fate was sealed; and, as the organ pealed forth +the grand prayer from _Mose in Egitto_ for the exodus of the +congregation, and I slowly paced down the aisle after my enchantress, my +soul expanded into a very heaven of adoration and love! + + + +CHAPTER TWO. + +EXPECTATION. + + "With what a leaden and retarding weight, + Does expectation load the wing of time!" + +When, after a few minutes, I got outside the church, she had +disappeared, although I had endeavoured to follow as close as I could on +her footsteps, without, of course, appearing to be intrusively watching +her. + +I had managed too cleverly. She was gone. I had been so long, to my +great vexation, painfully pacing after the slowly-moving, out-shuffling +mass of ex-worshippers--dexterously essaying the while to avoid treading +on the trailing trains of the ladies, or incurring the anathemas, "not +loud, but deep," of gouty old gentlemen with tender feet, which they +_would_ put in one's way--that, on my succeeding at length in arriving +at the outer porch, and being enabled to don my hat once more, there was +not a single trace of either her mother or herself to be seen anywhere +in sight. + +Here was a disappointment! While getting-out, I had made up my mind to +track them home, and find out where they lived; and now, they might be +beyond my ken for ever. + +I had noted them both so keenly, as to their appearance and the manner +in which each was dressed, for, in spite of mother and daughter being +alike "in mourning," there were still distinctive features in their +toilets, that I could not have failed to distinguish them from the rest +of the congregation. + +But now, my plans were entirely overthrown. What should I do in the +emergency? Stop, there was Horner; I would ask him if he had seen them. +There, dressed a merveille and with his inseparable eye-glass stuck +askew in the corner of his left eye, he stood listlessly criticising the +people as they came forth from prayer, in his usual impertinently- +inoffensive way. He was just as likely as not to have seen them, and +could naturally give me the information I sought about the direction in +which they had gone. + +"Jack Horner," as he was familiarly styled by those having the honour of +his acquaintance, was a clerk in Downing Street languishing on a +hundred-and-fifty pounds per annum, which paltry income he received from +an ungrateful country in consideration of his valuable services on +behalf of the state. How he contrived merely to dress himself and +follow the ever-changing fashions on that sum, paid quarterly though it +was, appeared a puzzle to many; but he did, and well, too. It was +currently believed, besides, by his congeners, that he never got into +debt, happy fellow that he was! notwithstanding that, in addition to his +hopes of promotion at "the office," he had considerable "expectations" +from a bachelor uncle, reported to be enormously wealthy and with no +near kindred to leave his money to save our friend Horner, who +cultivated him accordingly. + +No, Horner never got into debt. He was said to be in the habit of +promptly discharging all his tailor's claims punctually every year, as +the gay and festive season of Christmas--and bills!--came round. + +Truth to say, however, there need not have been any great astonishment +concerning Horner in this respect. The surprise would have been that he +had _not_ discharged his just obligations to his tailor and others; for +his habits were regular, and he was guiltless of the faintest soupcon of +extravagance. He never played billiards, did not smoke, did not care +about "little dinners" at Richmond or elsewhere, never betted, never +went to the Derby, seldom, if ever, patronised the theatre, unless +admitted through the medium of orders; consequently, he had no +expenditure, with the exception of that required for his toilet, as he +eschewed all those many and various ways mentioned for running through +money, which more excitable but less conscientious mortals than himself +find thrown in their way. + +His neatly-clad form and constant eye-glass were in great request at all +tea-parties and carpet dances that took place in the social circle to +which he belonged; but, beyond such slight beguilements of "life's dull +weary round," his existence was uneventful. His character altogether +might be said to have been a negative one, as the only speciality for +which he was particularly distinguished was for the variety of +intonation and meaning which he could give to his two favourite +exclamations, "Yaas," and "Bai-ey Je-ove!"--thus economising his +conversational powers to a considerable extent, which was a great +advantage for him--and others, too, as he might, you know, have had +little more to say. + +Horner's principal amusement when at home on a Sunday, was to go to +church; that is, if he had not to go to town, which was sometimes the +case even on the great day of rest, through his diplomatic skill being +required in Downing Street. This was what he said, pleading his having +to adjust some nice and knotty point of difference between the valiant +King of Congo and the neighbouring and pugnacious Ja Ja, or else to +remonstrate, in firm and equable language, as Officialdom knows so well +how to do, against the repeated unjustifiable homicides of the despot of +Dahomey, in sacrifice to his gods, beneath the sheltering shade of the +tum-tum tree. + +Well, what of that--you may pertinently remark--a most praiseworthy +proceeding, surely, on his part to go to church whenever he possibly +could? Granted; but then, Horner was prone to indulge in another +practice which might not be held quite so praiseworthy in some people's +view. + +Quite contrary to his abnormal mode of progression, he would hasten out +of the sacred edifice immediately after the doxology; and, planting +himself easily and gracefully in a studied attitude some short distance +from the doors, would from that commanding position proceed to stare at +and minutely observe the congregation, collectively and severally, as +they came tripping forth from the porch after him. This was, really, +very indefensible; and yet, I do not think that Horner meant to commit +any deliberate wrong in so doing. + +Be the motive what it may, such was his general habit. + +He would always courteously acknowledge the passing salutations of men- +folk with an almost imperceptible nod, so as not to disarrange the +careful adjustment of his eye-glass, or disturb the poise of his beaver: +to ladies, on the contrary, he was all "effusion," as the French say, +dashing off his hat as if he metaphorically flung it at their feet for a +gage d'amour, not of battle--just like an Ethiopian minstrel striking +the gay tambourine on his knee in a sudden flight of enthusiasm. All in +all, Horner was essentially a ladies' man, his points lying in that way; +and, although what is popularly known as "harmless," he was not by any +means a bad sort of fellow on the whole, when judged by the more +exacting masculine standard, being very good-natured and obliging, like +most of us, when you did not put him out of his way or expect too much +from him. + +To me at this crisis of my fate, he appeared for the nonce an angel in +human form. He would be just the person who could tell me in what +direction my unknown enchantress went. I would ask him. + +Fiat. + +"Hullo, Horner!" I said, tapping him at once on the shoulder, and +arresting him from the abstracted contemplation of two stylish girls in +pink, who were just turning the corner of the churchyard out of sight. + +"Yaas, 'do?" he replied, moving his head round slowly, as if it worked +on a pivot which, wanted greasing, so as to confront me. He was as mild +and imperturbable as usual. An earthquake, I believe, would not have +quickened his movements. + +"How d'ye do?" responded I to his mono-syllabical greeting. "I say, old +fellow," I continued, "did you chance to see which way two ladies went +who came out a minute or so before myself? One was middle-aged, or +thereabouts; the other young; both were dressed in half-mourning. They +looked strangers to the parish, I think: you must have seen them, I'm +sure, eh?" + +"Bai-ey Je-ove! Two middle-aged ladies; one dwessed in hawf-mawning?--" + +"Nonsense, Horner!" said I, interrupting him; "what a mess you are +making of it! I said _one_ lady was middle-aged; and _both_ dressed in +half-mourning." + +"Weally, now? No, Lorton, 'pon honah; didn't see 'em, I asshaw you. +Was it Baby Blake and her moth-ah, now, ah?" and he smiled complacently, +as if he had given me a fund of information. + +"Baby Blake!" I ejaculated in disgust--"why, Horner, you're quite +absurd. Do you take me for a fool? I think I ought to know Baby Blake +as well as yourself by this time, my Solon!" + +"Yaas; but, my deah fellah, I don't know who you know, you know. Bai-ey +Je-ove! there's _Lizzie_ Dangler. Who's that man she's got in tow, ah?" + +"Hang Lizzie Dangler!" I exclaimed, impatiently. "Can't you answer a +question for once in your life--did you see them, or not?" + +"Weally, Lorton," said he, in quite an imploring way, "you needn't get +angwy with a fellah, because he can't tell you what you want to know, +you know! It's weally too hot for that sawt of thing. I didn't see +them, I tell you. I can't say mo-ah than that, can I? You mustn't +expect a fellah to see evwybody. Why, it's seem-plee impawsible!" + +His languid drawl exasperated me. + +"Oh, bother!" I muttered, sotto voce, but loud enough for him to hear; +and turned away from him angrily, leaving him still standing in his pet +attitude, taking mental stock of all the fast-looking fair ones who +might come under his notice. "Oh, bother?" I am not prepared to assert +positively that I did not use a much stronger expletive. He _ought_ to +have seen them! What the deuce was the use of his sticking star-gazing +there, unless to observe people, I should like to know? + +Just fancy, too, his comparing my last madonna, the image and eidolon of +whose witching face filled my heart, to that odious little flirt, Baby +Blake, a young damsel that hawked her tender affections about at the +beck and call of every male biped who might for the moment be enthralled +by her charms! It was like his cool impudence. And then, again, his +asking me his stupid, inane questions, as if I cared what man, and how +many. Lizzie Dangler or any other girl might have "in tow," as he +called it. Idiot! I declare to you I positively hated Horner at that +moment, inoffensive and harmless as he was. + +I left the precincts of the church; and, walking along the path by the +fosse, directed my steps towards the Prebend's Walk, hoping to light +upon the object of my quest. + +The air was filled with the fragrance of wild flowers and the smell of +the new-mown hay from the adjacent meadows. One heard the buzzing sound +of busy insect life around, and the love-calls of song-birds from the +hedge-rows; while the grateful shade of the lime-grove seemed to invite +repose and suggest peaceful meditation: but I heeded none of these +things. I felt, like the singer of "The Banks and Braes of Bonny Doon," +out of harmony with nature and all its surroundings. My thoughts were +jostling one another in a wild dance through my breast. Where on earth +could they have disappeared so very suddenly! It was quite +inexplicable. I must find them. Himmel! I must see _her_ again. I +felt in a perfect state of frenzy. So excited was I, that, although it +was a broiling hot day in July, I walked along as if I were walking for +a wager. I do not think, by the way, that a very learned and +distinguished philosopher was so very much out in his reckoning after +all, when he laid down the general dogma, that all men are more or less +mad. I know, at all events, that I felt mad enough at this moment, as I +was careering along the Prebend's Walk. I was almost nerved up to +desperation. + +I was an only child; and my parents being both elderly people, rarely +mixing in society, I could not make use of home influence, as I might +have done if I had had any kind sister to assist me in the way that kind +sisters sometimes can assist their brothers when they fall victims to +the tender passion. Whom should I ask to help me in my strait? I could +not go round everywhere, asking everybody after two ladies dressed in +half-mourning, could I? Not exactly. People might take me for a maniac +at large; and, even should I be one, still, I would naturally wish to +keep my mental derangement to myself. What could I do? + +While I was thus perplexing myself with vain imaginings, the +recollection of the Dashers occurred to my mind. How was it that I had +not thought of them before, when they were the very people for my +purpose? Why, not a soul could come into Saint Canon's parish without +their knowledge, and a fresh face in church would set them at once on +the qui vive. The Dashers, of course, must have seen my unknown ladies, +and would be able to give me more information concerning them than I +could expect from any one else. I had often heard three to one betted, +with no "takers," that they would tell you everything about any +particular person, his, or her, antecedents, prospects, and position, +who had but remained for ten consecutive minutes within a radius of one +mile of their house. To the Dashers I would consequently go, by all +means--thank Providence for the suggestion, and their existence! + +Lady Dasher, the head of this all-wise circle, was the youngest daughter +of a deceased Irish peer, whom she was continually bringing on the +carpet, and causing--unhappy ghost that he was--to retrace his weary way +from wherever the spirits of defunct Hibernian nobles most do +congregate. + +She did not do this through family pride, or with any boastful +intention, but simply from sheer morbidity. She was always scoring down +grievances in the present by looking back on the past. With her, it was +all repining and retrospect. When her poor father, the earl, was alive, +she was never slighted in this way. Had her dear papa but now existed, +Mistress So-and-So would have returned her call, and not insulted her by +her palpable neglect. It was very Christian-like and charitable to say +otherwise; but _she_ knew better: it was on account of her being poor, +and living in a small house. Oh, yes! she was very well aware of +_that_; yet, although she could not keep up a grand establishment and +was poor, she was proud, and would never forget that she was an earl's +daughter. She would not be ground down with impunity! Even the worm +will turn: and so on. You can understand her character almost without +another word of description. + +In spite of being a kindly-hearted soul at bottom, she was really, I +believe, the most morbid and melancholic person that ever breathed,--at +least, in my experience. Should you, unfortunately, be forced to remain +for any length of time in her presence, she had a most singularly +depressing influence on your spirits. Wet blanket? Bless your heart! +that would be no name for her. She was a patent shower-bath, coming +down on all your cherished sentiments, hopes, and schemes, with a +"whish" of heavy extinguishment. The cheeriest, sprightliest mortal in +the world could not have continued gay in her society. Mark Tapley +would have met his match in her, I'm certain. + +Next to the demise of her lamented parent--which was indeed an after +consideration--Lady Dasher's marriage was the source and well-spring of +all her woes. She had espoused, as soon as she had a will of her own, a +handsome young gin distiller, who "ran" a large manufactory in Essex. +People said it was entirely a love match; but, whether that was the case +or no, all _I_ know is, that on changing the honoured name of +Planetree--the first Earl had been boot-black to the conquering Cromwell +in Ireland--for the base-born patronymic Dasher, all her troubles began. +Her noble relatives cut her dead in the first instance, as Dasher, +aspiring though he was, aspired a trifle too high. The connection was +never acknowledged; and his papa-in-law, utterly ignoring his entity, +never gave him the honour of an invitation to Ballybrogue Castle, the +ancestral seat of the Planetrees in Tipperary. + +This was not the worst of it, either. Dasher, forgetting that +simplicity of his forefathers which had promoted his fortunes, learnt on +his marriage to launch out into unheard-of extravagances, spending his +hardly-gained substance in riotous living. He kept open house in town +and country, getting laughed at, en parenthese, by the toadies who +spunged upon him; failed; got into "the Gazette;" and?--died of a broken +heart. Poor Dasher! + +On the death of her other half--it is problematical which half he was, +whether better or worse--Lady Dasher found herself left with a couple of +daughters and a few thousands, which her husband had taken care to +settle on her so as to be beyond the reach of his creditors. The +provision was ample to have enabled her to live in comfort, if she had +practised the slightest economy; but, never having learnt that species +of common sense, called "savoir faire," which is useful in every-day +life, Lady Dasher soon outran the constable. She then had to appeal to +her father, Earl Planetree, who, now that poor Dasher disgraced the +family escutcheon no longer by living, acknowledged her once more, +relieving her necessities; and when he, too, died, he bequeathed her a +fair income, on which, by dint of hard struggling, she contrived to +support existence and repine at her bitter lot. + +She was in the habit of telling people--who, between ourselves, were +hopelessly ignorant that such a person as the late earl had ever +breathed, and cared less, probably, about the fact--that had her poor +papa been yet alive, things would have been "very different with her;" +an assertion of questionable accuracy. + +There are some persons in this world who can never by any possibility +take a rose-coloured view of life. No matter what vivid touches the +great painter puts in on the canvas of their every-day being, they +always remain mentally colour-blind, and perceive but one monotonous +neutral tint--as they will continue to do until the end, when, +perchance, their proper sight may be restored. + +Lady Dasher was one of these. She persisted in taking a despondent view +of everything around her--her past, her future, her position, her +prospects; nay, even the circumstances and surroundings of her friends +and few intimates came to be regarded in the same unsatisfactory light. +She was unacquainted with the healthy tone of wisdom contained in the +old quatrain,-- + + "That man, I trow, is doubly blest, + Who of the worst can make the best; + And he, I'm sure, is doubly curst, + Who of the best doth make the worst!" + +Morbid and melancholic had been her disposition at the commencement of +the chapter:--morbid and melancholic she would naturally remain to its +close. + +With all her morbidity, however, she took a wonderful, albeit +lachrymose, interest in the temporal matters of the parish; and was +acquainted with most of the contemporary facts and incidents with which +her neighbours were mixed up, being mostly indebted for her information, +as she seldom went out herself, to her daughters Bessie and Seraphine-- +the latter commonly known amongst audacious young men as "the Seraph," +on account of her petite figure, her blue eyes, and her musical voice, +the latter having just a suspicion of Irish brogue and blarney about it. + +They were nice lively girls and much liked, as they were quite a +contrast to their mother. Indeed, it was surprising, considering her +disposition and their bringing up, that they were what they were. Had +it not been for them, Lady Dasher's existence would have been +considerably more monotonous and dreary than it was; but, thanks to +their assistance, she was kept thoroughly "posted up" in all the social +life going on in her midst, in which, through her own lache, she was +unable to take part. + +Bessie and Seraphine did not attend parties, although sprightly, taking +girls like themselves would have been welcomed in almost any circle. +The fact was, people would have been glad enough to invite them, had +their mother not been jealous of any attention paid to her daughters +that was not extended to herself; and, hospitable as their friends might +be, it was but reasonable that a monument of grief and picture of woe +unutterable should not be earnestly sought after for the centre-piece of +a social gathering. It was owing to the same reason, also, that neither +of the girls had yet got married; for Lady Dasher would certainly have +expected any matrimonial proposal to have been made to herself in the +first instance, when, after declining the honour, she could have passed +the handkerchief to her daughters. Besides, the mere dread of having +the infliction of such a mother-in-law would have sufficed to frighten +off the most ardent wooer or rabid aspirant for connubial felicity. + +Notwithstanding this, the girls went about to some extent in their own +ways; and, on their return home, naturally gossiped with their mother +over all they had seen and heard abroad. Thus it was that Lady Dasher +was so well-informed in all local matters, and why I thought of +appealing to her aid. But I should have to manage cautiously. She +would think nothing--she was such a simple-minded body--of detailing all +your inquiries to the very subject of them, in a fit of unguarded +confidence. Cross-examining her was a most diplomatic proceeding. If +you went the right way about it, you could get anything out of her +without committing yourself in the slightest way; whereas, if you set to +work wrongly, you might not only be foundered by a provoking reticence, +which she could assume at times, but might, also, some day hear that +your secret intentions and machiavellian conduct were the common talk of +the parish. + +Lady Dasher, although of a strictly pious turn of mind, did not object +to Sunday callers. Good. I would go there that very afternoon after +lunch, and see how the land lay. + +I kept my resolve, and went. + +Ushered into the well-known little drawing-room of the corner house of +The Terrace, whose windows had a commanding view of the main +thoroughfare of our suburb, I had ample leisure, before the ladies +appeared, of observing the arrangement of certain fuchsias in a monster +flower-stand that took up half the room, on the growth and excellence of +which Lady Dasher prided herself greatly. Praise her fuchsias, and you +were the most excellent of men; pass them by unnoticed, and you might be +capable of committing the worst sin in the decalogue. + +Is it not curious, how particular scents of flowers and their appearance +will call up old scenes and circumstances to your memory? To this day, +the mere sight of a fuchsia will bring back to my mind Lady Dasher's +little drawing-room; and I can fancy myself sitting in the old easy- +chair by the window, and listening to that morbid lady's chit-chat. + +Presently my lady came in, pale and melancholy, as usual, and with her +normal expression of acutest woe. + +"Dear me, Mr Lorton! how very ill you are looking, to be sure. Is +there not consumption in your family?" + +"Not that I'm aware of, Lady Dasher, thank you," I replied; "but how +well _you_ are looking, if one may judge by appearances." + +"Ah!" she sighed with deep sadness, "appearances, my young friend, are +very deceptive. I am _not_ well--far from it, in fact. I believe, Mr +Lorton, that I am fast hastening to that bourne from whence no traveller +ever returns. I would not be at all surprised to wake up some morning +and find that I was dead!" + +"Indeed!" I said, for the fact she hinted at would have been somewhat +astonishing to a weak-minded person. I then tried to change the +conversation from this sombre subject to one I had more at heart; but it +was very hard to lead her on the track I wished. "We had a good +congregation to-day, Lady Dasher, I think," said I; "the church seemed +to be quite crammed." + +"Really, now; do you think so? _I_ did not consider it at all a large +gathering. When poor dear papa was alive, I've seen twice the number +there, I am certain. _You_ may say that the falling off is due to the +hot weather and people going out of town, but _I_ think it is owing to +the spread of unbelief. We are living in terrible times, Mr Lorton. +It seems to me that every one is becoming more atheistic and wicked +every day. I don't know what we shall come to, unless we have another +deluge, or something of that sort, to recall us to our senses!" + +Fortunately at this juncture, before Lady Dasher, could get into full +swing on her favourite theological hobby-horse--the degeneracy of the +present age--Bessie and Seraphine entered the room. The conversation +then became a trifle livelier, and we discussed the weather, the +fashions, and various items of clerical gossip. + +I discreetly asked if they had seen any new faces in church. But no; +neither of them had, it was evident, seen my ladies in half-mourning, +about whom I was diffident of inquiring directly. + +Were any fresh people coming to reside in the neighbourhood that they +had heard of? + +"No," said Lady Dasher, with a melancholy shake of her head. "No; how +should they? It is not very likely that any new residents would come +_here_! The place may suit poor people like _me_, but would not take +the fancy of persons having plenty of money to spend, who can select a +house where they like. Ah! the miseries of poverty, Mr Lorton, and to +be poor but proud! I hope _you_ will never have my bitter experience, +I'm sure!"--with another sad shake of her head, and an expression on her +face that she was pretty certain that I _would_ one day arrive at the +same hollow estimate of life as herself. "No," she continued, "no new +people are at all likely to come here. I saw Mr Shuffler yesterday, +and asked if that house which he has to let in The Terrace were yet +taken, but he said, `not that he knew of;' he had `heard of nobody +coming'--had I? I assure you he was quite impertinent about it. He +would not have spoken to me so uncivilly had poor dear papa been alive, +I know! But it is always the way with that class of people:--they only +look upon you in the light of how much you are worth!" + +"Oh, ma!" said Bessie Dasher, "I think Mr Shuffler very civil and +polite. He always makes me quite a low bow whenever he sees me." + +"Ah! my dear," said her mother, "that's because you are young and +pretty, as I was once. He never bows to me as he used to do when your +grandpapa lived." + +After a little more harping on the same string, the conversation +drooped; and, as none of them could give me any further information +towards assisting my quest, I took my leave of Lady Dasher and her +daughters, in a much less buoyant frame of mind than when I had first +thought of my visit an hour or so previously. + +I had made certain that they would know something of the mysterious +ladies in half-mourning; consequently, I was all the more disappointed. +However, they had given me one hint; I would ask Shuffler himself, on +the morrow, whether any new residents were expected in the suburb. + +Shuffler was a house-agent who had to do with all the letting and +taking, overhauling and repairing, of most of the habitations in our +neighbourhood. He was a portly, oily personage; one who clipped his +English royally, and walked, through the effects of bunions, I believe-- +although some mistook it for gout, and gave him the credit of being +afflicted with that painful but aristocratic malady--as if he were +continuously on pattens, or wore those clumsy wooden sabots which the +Normandy peasantry use. He was also one-eyed, like Cyclops, the place +of the missing organ being temporarily filled with a round glass orb, +whose nature could be detected at a glance; this seemed to stare at you +with a dull, searching look and take mental and disparaging stock of +your person, while the sound eye was winking and blinking at you as +jovially as you please. + +Shuffler was affable enough to me, as usual, in despite of Lady Dasher +having such a bad opinion of his manners; but, he could give me no +information such as I wanted to hear. Everybody, really, appeared to be +as cautious as "Non mi recordo" was on Queen Caroline's trial. Nobody +had heard of anybody coming to our neighbourhood. Nobody had seen any +strange faces about. Nobody knew anything! + +It was quite vexatious. + +I haunted the Prebend's Walk. I went to church three times every +Sunday, but did not meet her. The only thing I had to assure me that it +was not all a dream, and that I had really seen her, was the little +spray of mignonette, which I carried next my heart. + +It was now July. + +Sultry August came and passed; dull September followed suit; dreary +October ensued, in the natural cycle of the seasons; foggy, suicidal +November came; and yet, _she_ came not! + +I felt almost weary of waiting and looking out and longing, +notwithstanding the inward assurance I had, and the fact of my whole +nature being imbued with the belief that we should meet again. We +_must_ meet. I knew _that_, I felt firmly convinced of it. + +Thus the year wore on. Weeks and months elapsed since our meeting in +church, which I should never, never forget. + +Dreary, dreary expectation! I lost interest regarding things in which I +had formerly been interested. The society of people which I had +previously coveted became distasteful to me. + +Lady Dasher, you may be sure, I never went nigh; _she_ would have +altogether overwhelmed me. + +As for that insufferable ass, Horner, he was always asking me whenever +we met, which was much oftener than I cared about, with a provoking +simper and his unmeaning, eye-glass stare and drawling voice--coupled +with a tone of would-be-facetious irony--"Bai-ey Je-ove! I say, old +fellah, seen those ladies in hawf-mawning yet, ah?" + +Brute! I could have kicked him; and I wonder now that I didn't! + + + +CHAPTER THREE. + +M'APPARI. + + "She's coming, my own, my sweet! + Had she never so airy a tread, + My heart would hear her, and beat, + Were it earth in an earthy bed!" + +It was now November, as I have already said; and a very dull, dismal, +desolate November it was--more so, even, than usual. Fogs were +frequent, rain regular, and the sun singular in his appearance. It was +enough to make one feel miserable, without the haunting thoughts that +affected me; so, before the weather became too much for me and turned me +insane, I determined to go abroad for a short time to try what change of +air and scene could do towards relaxing my mind, although nothing could +banish the remembrance of _her_ from my heart. + +When I came back to England, it was close on Christmas, and Christmas, +you must know, was always a busy and stirring time with us in our +suburb, especially so, too, for its younger and prettier parishioners. + +Then the church had to be decorated--a matter not to be trifled with. +Commencing about a week or ten days before the festival, these young +ladies would gather themselves together in the old school-room, which +was a detached building, situated a short distance from Saint Canon's. + +Here, the scholars being dismissed for their long holidays, they would +change the look of the academic apartment into that of a miniature +Covent Garden market or greengrocer's shop, filling it up with heaps of +evergreens--holly and ivy and yew, ad libitum, to be transformed by the +aid of their nimble fingers into all sorts of floral decorations. +Garlands were woven, elaborate illuminated texts and scrolls painted, +and wondrous crosses of commingled laurel leaves and holly berries +contrived; all of which went so far to change the aspect of the old +church, that those well acquainted with it could not help wondering +within themselves, if, indeed, it was really so _very_ old and ancient +after all as learned archaeologists said; while new comers, who only saw +it in its festal trim, had serious doubts as to whether they were not in +a ritualistic edifice--the vicar allowing the girls to have their own +way and import as much natural ornament as they pleased. The flowers +and shrubs were God's handiwork, he said, so why should they not be used +in God's service, to do honour to "the Giver of the feast?" + +This year was no exception to the general practice. On my going down to +the school-room on the first day that the work of "the decorations" +began, which was the very morning after my return from the continent, I +found things just as they had been in previous years, save that some +half-a-dozen panes of glass had been smashed in the oriel window at the +eastern end of the room, through the incautious manipulation of a bunch +of holly by some "green" hand. + +There were the usual number of young ladies, all of whose faces I knew +so well, engaged in the pious work; with Horner, Mr Mawley the curate, +and one or _two_ other attendant male aides, to minister to their +needs--such as stripping off leaves for wreath making--and help them to +flirt the dull hours away. Dear little Miss Pimpernell, our vicar's +maiden sister and good right hand, presided, also, to preserve order and +set an example for industrious souls to follow, just as she had been in +the habit of presiding as far back as I could recollect. + +She was not there merely as a chaperon. Oh no! If Lady Dasher, sitting +on an upturned form in a corner, like a very melancholy statue of +Patience, was not sufficient to prevent the prudent proprieties from +being outraged, there was, also, the "model of all the virtues" +present--Miss Spight--a lady of a certain age, who, believing, as the +kindly beings of her order do, that there was too large a flow of the +milk of human kindness current in the world, deemed it her mission to +temper this dispensation by the admixture of as much vitriol and vinegar +as in her lay: she succeeded pretty well, too, for that matter, in her +practice and belief. + +Little Miss Pimpernell was quite a different sort of body altogether to +Miss Spight. Every one who knew her, or ever saw her kindly face, loved +her and venerated her. + +She was the very impersonification of good-nature, good-will, and good +action. Did any misfortune chance to befall some one with whom she was +acquainted, or any casual stranger with whom she might be brought in +contact, there was none of that "I told you so" spirit of philosophy +about _her_. + +No; she tried to do her best for the sufferer as well as she was able; +and would not be contented until she was absolutely satisfied that +matters had somewhat mended. + +Young and old, rich and poor, alike considered her as one of their best +friends--as indeed she was--a good Samaritan to whom they might always +confide their griefs and ailments, their sufferings and privations, with +the assurance that they would certainly meet with a kindly sympathy and +a word of comfort, in addition to as much practical assistance in their +adversity and physical consolation in their need as "little" Miss +Pimpernell--that was the fond title she was always known by--could +compass or give. + +The worst of it was, that she was in such general request, that we had +to make up our minds to lose her sometimes. + +Of course it was a selfish consideration, but we missed her and grumbled +at her visits and absences sadly; for, when she was away, everything +appeared to go wrong in the parish. Still none, knowing the +gratification that her ministrations gave her, would have grudged her +their indulgence. + +She was never so happy as when she was helping somebody; and, of course, +people took advantage of her weakness, and were merciless in their calls +upon her time. + +Whenever the most distant cousin or stray relative happened to be ill-- +or about to move into a new house, or be married, or increase the +population in defiance of Malthus, or depart from the pomps and vanities +of this wicked world--as sure as possible would Miss Pimpernell be sent +for post haste. She had, as a matter of course, to nurse the patient, +assist the flitting, accelerate the wedding, welcome the little +stranger, or console the mourners as the case might be. + +We, the inhabitants of the suburb which she blessed with her presence, +thought all this a gross infringement of our rights in her possession, +although we welcomed the dear old lady all the more gladly when we got +her back again amongst us once more. + +As for confidences, I believe she had the skeleton secret of every soul +in the place confided to her sacred keeping at some one time or other; +and love stories! why, she must have been cram full of them--from the +heart-breaking affair of poor little Polly Skittles, the laundress' +pretty daughter, up to Baby Blake's last flirtation. + +What her brother would have done without her, it would be impossible to +tell. She had quite as much to do with the parish as he; and, I'm sure, +if little Miss Pimpernell had not kept house for him and minded all his +temporal affairs, he would never have known what to eat or drink, or +what to put on. + +The vicar had lost his wife soon after his marriage, when he was quite a +young man; but, instead of being bowed down by his affliction, as might +have been the case with a good many ardent natures like his, he +earnestly fought against it, buckling to his work, all the more +vigorously perhaps, as one of Christ's ministers. + +Everybody thenceforth was wife and child, brother and sister to him: +humanity in general took the place of all family ties. + +He was the purest Christian character I have ever come across, lovable, +intelligent, winning and merry, too, at times, in spite of his grief-- +would that all ministers were like him to uphold the old love and honour +of our national Church! + +No orator or skilled preacher in the pulpit, he simply led you captive +by his earnestness and evident thorough belief in all that he uttered; +so that "those who came to scoff, remained to pray." No hard, metallic +repetition by rote was his; but the plain, unvarnished story of the +gospel which he felt and of whose truth he was assured, animated by a +broad spirit of Protestantism that led him to extend a raising hand to +every erring brother, and see religion in other creeds besides his own. + + "In his duty prompt at every call, + He watch'd and wept, he pray'd and felt for all; + And, as a bird each fond endearment tries, + To tempt its new-fledged offspring to the skies, + He tried each art, reproved each dull delay, + Allured to brighter worlds, and _led the way_!" + +He and his good sister were, in fact, a pair of heart-oddities, whom to +know was to admire with reverential affection. They could not have had +an enemy or slanderer in the world. Even Miss Spight had never a word +to say against either; that alone spoke volumes for them. + +"Oh, Frank," exclaimed little Miss Pimpernell as I entered the school- +room--she always called me by my Christian name, or styled me her "boy," +having known me from childhood--"Oh, Frank! Here you are at last! I am +so glad to see you back again, my boy: you have just come in time to +help us. I was really afraid those nasty Frenchmen had eaten you up, +you have been such a long time away!" + +"I dare say there's enough left of him," sneered Mr Mawley the curate. +_He_ was the direct opposite of the vicar; and a man whom I cordially +detested, the feeling, I believe, being mutual. He was consequential, +dogmatic, and with all the self-asserting priggishness of young Oxford +fresh upon him. I confess I was pretty much inclined the same way +myself; so, it was but natural that we should disagree: two suns, you +know, cannot shine in the same hemisphere. + +Before I could answer him, Miss Pimpernell hastily interposed. She +hated to hear us arguing and bickering as was generally our way when we +met. "Please bring the measuring tape, Frank," she said, "you will find +it on that bench in the corner; and come and see how long my wreath is. +It should be just nineteen feet, but I'm afraid I am a yard short." + +By the time I had done as my old friend requested, the conversation +which I had interrupted by my advent resumed its course. They were +talking about the future world, and ventilating sundry curious thoughts +on the subject. + +"And what do _you_ think heaven will be like?" asked Seraphine Dasher, +appealing to me. "Everybody's opinion has been given but yours and Miss +Pimpernell's, and Mr Mawley's; and I'm coming to them presently." + +"I'm sure I can't say," I answered, "perhaps a combination of choral +music, running water, I mean the sound of brooks gliding and fountains +splashing, with almond toffee at discretion: that's my idea of earthly +felicity at least." + +"Oh, fie!" said my interlocutor; while I could hear Miss Spight murmur +"What deplorable levity," as she glowered at me severely and looked +sympathisingly at Mr Mawley. + +"Well," said I, "I was only joking then; for, really, I've never +seriously thought about the matter. As far as I can believe, however, I +do not imagine heaven is going to be a place where we'll be singing +hymns all day. I think we shall be happy there, each in our several +ways, as we are on earth, and be in the company of those we love: heaven +would be miserable without that, I think." + +"And what do you say, Miss Pimpernell?" next asked Seraphine. + +"I do not say anything at all, my dear: the subject is beyond me. I +leave it to One who is wiser than us all to tell me in his own good +time." + +"And you, Mr Mawley?" continued our fair questioner. + +"We should not seek to understand the mysteries of the oracles of God," +said the curate pompously. + +"My dear, I can tell you," said the vicar, who had slipped in quietly, +unknown to us all, "`Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have +entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for +them that love him!'" + +"I wonder, sir," said I, "whether that text, `In My Father's house are +many mansions,' means that there are different degrees of happiness in +the future world?" + +"That passage," said the vicar, "is one whose interpretation has been +more disputed than any I know. Some say it has the meaning which you +attach to it; while others, with whom I am more inclined to agree, think +that it conveys only the promise and assurance that in heaven there will +be found room for us all. You must remember that we in the present day +have the Bible through the medium of translation; and all translations +are liable to error. Why, if you read the Book of Job, for instance, in +the original Hebrew, without the arbitrary division into verses which +the translators of the authorised version inserted, you would find it a +perfect poem!" + +"For my part," said Mr Mawley, "I do not think we ought to speak about +religious matters in this sort of way, and make them subjects for +general conversation." + +"I don't agree with you, Mawley," said the vicar, "the truth is not so +brittle that we should be afraid of handling it; if religion were more +openly discussed and brought into our daily life, I believe we should be +all the better for it." + +"Ah, you are Broad Church!" said the curate. + +"Very well, be it so," said the vicar good-humouredly; "I'm not ashamed +of it, so long as you allow that I'm at least a Christian." + +"What _is_ Broad Church, Mr Mawley?" asked Bessie Dasher, who was +suspected of having tender feelings towards the curate, for she +generally deferred to his views and opinions. + +"Broad Church," said Mr Mawley, "holds that every man is at liberty to +judge for himself; and that any Sectarian or Unitarian, or heathen, has +as much chance of heaven as you or I." + +"Positively shocking!" said Miss Spight, in virtuous indignation at any +nonconformist being esteemed as worthy of future salvation as herself. + +"Oliver Wendell Holmes," I said, "gives a truer exposition. He says +that `the narrow church may be seen in the ship's boats of humanity, in +the long boat, in the jolly boat, in the captain's gig, lying off the +poor old vessel, thanking God that _they_ are safe, and reckoning how +soon the hulk containing the mass of their fellow-creatures will go +down. The Broad Church is on board, working hard at the pumps, and very +slow to believe that the ship will be swallowed up with so many poor +people in it, fastened down under the hatches ever since it floated!'" + +"Ah, that is better," said the vicar. "It is there put very aptly. If +we could only be less bigoted, and assimilate our various sects +together, what a happy church would ours be! We all have the same sure +fundamental ground of belief, and only differ in details." + +"But, my dear sir," said the curate, in pious horror, "that is rank +latitudinarianism!" + +"Latitudinarianism or not, Mawley," said the vicar, "it is the +Christianity and doctrine that earnest thinkers like Kingsley and +Maurice preach and practise. If we could only all act up to it--all act +up to it!" + +"Then, I suppose," said Mr Mawley, "that you agree with the writers of +_Essays and Reviews_?" + +"Suppose nothing, my dear Mawley," said the vicar, kindly but seriously, +"except what you have facts to vouch for. I do not say I agree with +them or not." + +"And do you think the hare chewed the cud, as Colenso says?" asked Baby +Blake, with such a serious face that we could not help laughing at her. + +"Proximus ille deo est qui scit ratione tacere!" said the vicar, putting +on his hat and moving towards the door. + +"And what does that mean, brother?" asked Miss Pimpernell. + +"My dear, it is only Dionysius Cato's original Latin for our old English +proverb, `A silent tongue shows a wise head!'" said the vicar; and he +then went out to attend to his parish duties, promising to look in upon +us again, and see how we were getting on before we separated for the +day. + +On his departure, our conversation veered round to local chit-chat. + +"Have you heard the news about The Terrace yet, Frank?" asked Miss +Pimpernell. + +"No," I said. "What is it?" + +"Number sixty-five is let at last!" + +"Indeed," said I; "how pleased old Shuffler must be, for the house has +hung a long time on his hands. Who are the people that have taken it?" + +"A widow lady and her daughter. Their name is Clyde, and they have a +good deal of money, I believe," said Bessie Dasher. + +"Bai-ey Je-ove!" exclaimed Horner. "I say, old fellah, p'waps they ah +those ladies in hawf-mawning, ah?" + +"Dear me! this is quite interesting," said Miss Spight. "Do let me know +what the joke is about ladies in half-mourning, Mr Lorton--something +romantic, I've no doubt." She was always keen to scent out what might +be disagreeable to other people, was Miss Spight! + +"Oh, it's only Horner's nonsense!" said I. "But what are these Clydes +like?" + +"Very nice, indeed!" said Miss Pimpernell. "The mother is extremely +well-bred and ladylike, and the daughter Minnie--such a pretty name, +Frank--is quite a little darling. I'm positively in love with her, and +I'm sure you will like her. They are very nice people indeed, my boy, +and thorough acquisitions to our little society." + +"I only hope so, Miss Pimpernell," sighed Lady Dasher; "but appearances, +you know, are _so_ deceitful sometimes." + +"Ah!" ejaculated Miss Spight, "handsome is as handsome does! We'll see +them by and by in their true colours; new brooms, Lady Dasher, sweep +clean. Ah!" + +There was a world in that "ah!" + +"Well," said little Miss Pimpernell, in her staunch good-nature, "I +think it is best to be charitable and take people as we find them. I +have seen a good deal of the Clydes during the month they have been here +and like them very much. But you will have an opportunity of judging +for yourself, Frank, as Minnie Clyde promised me to come down to-day and +help us with the decorations." + +"She's a very nice-looking girl," said the curate. + +"Do you really think her pretty?" asked Bessie Dasher. One could detect +a slight tone of dissatisfaction in her voice, and she spoke with a +decided pout. + +"Well, perhaps she's not exactly pretty," said Mr Mawley, +diplomatically; "but nice-looking, at all events--that was the word I +used, Miss Bessie." + +"But she dresses so plainly!" said Lizzie Dangler. + +"I call her quite a dowdthy!" lisped Baby Blake. + +"And I say she's very nice!" said Seraphine Dasher, who had none of the +petty dislike of her sex to praise another girl that might turn out to +be a possible rival. + +"That's right, my dear," said Miss Pimpernell; "I'm glad, Seraphine, to +hear you take the part of the absent; Miss Clyde ought to be here now-- +she promised me to come soon after luncheon." + +Even as the good old soul spoke, I heard the outer door of the school- +room open, and a light footstep along the passage. "There she is now, I +do believe!" whispered Miss Pimpernell to me. + +I could scarcely breathe. I felt that I had at last arrived at the +crisis of my life. It must be _her_, I thought, for my heart palpitated +with wild pulsations. + +And, as the thought thrilled through me, my lost madonna entered the +room. + +I was not one whit surprised. I had been certain that I should see her +again! + + + +CHAPTER FOUR. + +"HOPE." + + "The wit, the vivid energy of sense, + The truth of nature, which, with Attic point, + And kind, well-temper'd satire, smoothly keen, + Steals through the soul, and without pain corrects." + +Yes, she it was of whom I had thought and dreamt, and built airy castles +on imaginative foundations--chateaux en Espagne--that had almost +crumbled into vacancy during those long and weary weeks, and monotonous +months, of waiting, and watching, and longing! + +She entered; and the dull, disordered school-room, with its leaf-strewn +floor all covered with broken branches and naked boughs of chopped-up +evergreens, its mass of piled forms, its lumbering desks and hassocks, +its broken windows, its down-hanging maps of colossal continents, seemed +changed all at once, in a moment, as if by the touch of some magic wand, +into an enchanted palace. + +The fairy princess had at last appeared, the sleeping beauty been +awakened; and all was altered. + +The semi-transparent sprig of mistletoe, which Seraphine Dasher had +mischievously suspended over the doorway, looked like a chaplet of +pearls; the pointed stems of yew became frosted in silver; the +variegated holly was transformed into branches of malachite, ornamented +with a network of gold, its bright red berries glowing with a ruddy +reflection as of interspersed rubies; while, above all, the glorious +sunshine, streaming in through the shattered panes of the oriel at the +eastern end, cast floods of quickening, mellow light, to the remotest +corners of the room, making the floating atoms of dust turn to waves of +powdery amber, and enriching every object it touched with its luminous +rays. Even the very representations of Europe, Asia, and Africa, on the +walls, lost their typographical characteristics, and shone out to me in +the guise of tapestried chronicles, ancient as those of Bayeux, +describing deeds of gallant chivalry--so my fancy pictured--and love, +and knight-errantry, painted over with oriental arabesques in crimson +gilding, the cunning handiwork of the potent sun-god. Her coming in +effected all this to my mind. + +What a darling she looked, sitting there, with a pretty little scarlet +and white sontag, of soft wool knitting, crossed over her bosom and +clasped round her dainty, dainty waist; her busy fingers industriously +weaving broad ivy garlands for the church columns, and her sweet, calm +face bent earnestly over her task--the surrounding foliage, scattered +here, there, and everywhere, bringing out her well-formed figure in +relief, just like a picture in some rustic portrait frame! Micat inter +omnes, as Virgil sang of "the young Marcellus," his hero: she "glistened +out before them all." + +Of course she was introduced to me. + +"Mr Lorton--Miss Minnie Clyde." Now, at last, I had met her and knew +her name! What a pretty name she had, too, as little Miss Pimpernell +had said! Just in keeping with its owner. + +As my name was pronounced, she raised her beautiful grey eyes from the +garland in her lap; and I could perceive, from a sudden gleam of +intelligence which shot through them for an instant, that I was at once +recognised:--from my face, I'm sure, she must have noticed that _she_ +had not been forgotten. + +I was in heaven; I would not have relinquished my position, kneeling at +her feet and stripping off ivy leaves for her use, no, not for a +dukedom! + +Our conversation became again imperceptibly of a higher tone. Hers was +light, sparkling, brilliant; and one could see that she possessed a fund +of native drollery within herself, despite her demure looks and downcast +eyes. She had a sweet, low voice, "that most excellent thing in woman;" +while her light, silvery laughter rippled forth ever and anon, like a +chime of well-tuned bells, enchaining me as would chords of Offenbach's +champagne music. + +In comparison with her, Lizzie Dangler's prosy platitudes, which some +deemed wit--Horner, par exemple--sank into nothingness, and Baby Blake, +one of the "gushing" order of girlhood, appeared as a stick, or, rather, +a too pliant sapling--her inane "yes's" and lisping "no's" having an +opportunity of being "weighed in the balance," and consequently, in my +opinion, "found wanting." All were mediocre beside her. Perhaps I was +prejudiced; but, now, the remarks of the other girls seemed to me +singularly silly. + +From light badinage, we got talking of literature. Some one, Mr Mawley +the curate, I think, drew a parallel between Douglas Jerrold and +Thackeray, describing both, in his blunt, dogmatic way, as cynics. + +To this I immediately demurred. In the first place, because Mawley was +so antipathetical to me, that I dearly loved to combat his assertions; +and, secondly, on account of his disparaging my beau ideal of all that +is grand and good in a writer and in man. + +"You make a great mistake," I said, "for Thackeray is a satirist pur et +simple. Jerrold was a cynic, if you please, although he had a wonderful +amount of kindly feeling even in his bitterest moods--indeed I would +rather prefer calling him a one-sided advocate of the poor against the +rich, than apply to him your opprobrious term." + +"Well, cynic or satirist, I should like to know what great difference +lies between the two?" the curate retorted, glad of an argument, and +wishing, as usual, to display his critical acumen by demolishing me. + +"I will tell you with pleasure," said I, not a bit "put out," according +to his evident wish and expectation, "and I will use the plainest +language in my exposition, so that you may be able to understand me! A +cynic, I take it, is one who talks or writes bitterly, in the +gratification of a malicious temperament, merely for the sake of +inflicting pain on the object of his attack, just as a bad-dispositioned +boy will stick pins in a donkey, or persecute a frog, for the sheer sake +of seeing it wince: a satirist, on the contrary, is a philosopher who +ridicules traits of character, customs and mannerisms, with the +intention of remedying existing evils, abolishing abuses, and reforming +society--in the same way as a surgeon performs an operation to remove an +injured limb, inflicting temporary pain on his patient, with the +prospect of ultimate good resulting from it. I have never seen this +definition given anywhere; consequently, as it is but my own private +opinion, you need only take it for what it is worth." + +"Thank you, Mr Lorton," said _somebody_, giving me a gratefully +intelligent look from a pair of deep, thinking grey eyes. + +"Oh, indeed! so that's your opinion, Lorton?" put in Mr Mawley, as +antagonistic as ever. "So that's your opinion, is it? I _will_ do as +you say, and take it for what it is worth--that is, keep my own still! +You may be very sharp and clever, and all that sort of thing, my dear +fellow; but I don't see the difference between the two that you have so +lucidly pointed out. Satire and cynicism are co-equal terms to my mind: +your argument won't persuade me, Lorton, although I must say that you +are absolutely brilliant to-day. You should really start a school of +Modern Literature, my dear fellow, and set up as a professor of the +same!" + +"Please get my scissors, Frank," said Miss Pimpernell, trying to stop +our wordy warfare. I got them; but I had my return blow at the curate +all the same. + +"I suppose you'd be one of my first pupils, Mr Mawley," I said. "I +think I could coach you up a little!" + +He was going to crush me with some of his sledge-hammer declamation, +being thoroughly roused, when Bessie Dasher averted the storm, by +entering the arena and changing the conversation to a broader footing. + +"How I dote on Thackeray!" she exclaimed with all her natural +impulsiveness. "What a dear, delicious creature Becky Sharp is; and +that funny old baronet, Sir Pitt something or other, too! When I first +took up _Vanity Fair_ I could not let it out of my hands until I +finished it." + +"That's more than I can say," said the curate. "I don't like Thackeray. +He cuts up every one and everything. Is not that a cynic for you?" + +"Not everybody," said Min--I cannot call her anything else now--coming +to my assistance, "not everybody, Mr Mawley. I think Thackeray, with +all his satire and kindly laughter in his sleeve at persons that ought +to be laughed down, has yet given us some of the most pathetic touches +of human nature existing in English literature. There's the old colonel +in _The Newcomes_, for instance. That little bit about his teaching his +tiny grandson to say his prayers, before he put him into bed in his poor +chamber in the Charter House, to which he was reduced, would make any +one cry. And Henry Esmond, and Warrington, and Laura--where would you +find more nobly-drawn characters than those?" and she stopped, out of +breath with her defence of one of the greatest writers we have ever had, +indignant, with such a pretty indignation, at his merits being +questioned for a moment. + +"Of course I must bow to your decision, Miss Clyde," said the curate, +with one of those stock ceremonial bows that stood him in such good +stead amongst the female community of the parish. He was a cunning +fellow, Mawley. Knew which way his interest lay; and never went against +the ladies if he could help it. "But," he continued, "if we talk of +pathos, there's `the great master of fiction,' Dickens; who can come up +to him?" + +"Ah, yes! Mr Mawley,"--chorused the majority of the girls--"we quite +agree with you: there's nobody like Dickens!" + +It is a strange thing how perverse the divine sex is, in preferring +confectionery to solid food; and superficial writers, to those who dive +beneath the surface of society and expose its rottenness--like as they +esteem Tupper's weak-minded version of Solomon's Proverbs beyond the +best poetry that ever was written! + +I wasn't going to be beaten by the curate, however, prattled he never so +wisely with the cunning of the serpent-charmer. "I grant you," said I, +"that Dickens appeals oftener to our susceptible sympathies; but he is +_unreal_ in comparison with Thackeray. The one was a far more correct +student of human nature than the other. Dickens selected +exceptionalities and invested them with attributes which we never see +possessed by their prototypes whom we may meet in the world. He gives +us either caricature, or pictures of men and women seen through a rose- +coloured medium: Thackeray, on the other hand, shows you life _as it +is_. He takes you behind the scenes and lets you perceive for yourself +how the `dummies' and machinery are managed, how rough the distemper +painting, all beauty from the front of `the house,' looks on nearer +inspection, how the `lifts' work, and the `flats' are pushed on; besides +disclosing all the secrets connected with masks and `properties.' He is +not content in merely allowing you to witness the piece from before the +curtain, in the full glory of that distance from the place of action +which lends enchantment to the view, and with all the deceptive +concomitants of music and limelights and Bengal fire! To adopt another +illustration, I should say that Dickens was the John Leech of fictional +literature, Thackeray its Hogarth. Even Jerrold, I think, in his most +bitter, cynical moods, was truer to life and nature than Dickens. Did +you ever read the former's _Story of a Feather_, by the way?" + +"No," answered Mawley, testily, "I can't say I ever did; and I don't +think it likely I ever will." + +"Well, I dare say you are quite right, Frank," said the kindly voice of +my usual ally little Miss Pimpernell, interposing just at the right +time--as she always did, indeed--to throw oil on the troubled waters. +"But, still, I like Dickens the best. Do you know, children," she went +on, looking round, as we all sat watching her dear old wrinkled face +beaming cheerily on us through her spectacles, "do you know, children, +I've no doubt you'll laugh at me for telling you, but, when I first read +`David Copperfield'--and I was an old woman then--I cried my eyes out +over the account of the death of poor Dora's little dog Gyp. Dear +little fellow! Don't you recollect how he crawled out of his tiny +Chinese pagoda house, and licked his master's hand and died? I think +it's the most affecting thing in fiction I ever read in my life." + +"And I, too, dear Miss Pimpernell," said Min, in her soft, low voice, +which had a slight tremor as she spoke, and there was a misty look in +her clear grey eyes--silent witnesses of the emotion that stirred her +heart. "I shed more tears over poor Gyp than I can bear to think of +now--except when I cried over little Tiny Tim, in the `Christmas Carol,' +where, you remember, the spirit told Uncle Scrooge that the cripple boy +would die. That affected me equally, I believe; and I could not read it +dry-eyed now." + +"Nor I," lisped Baby Blake, following suit, in order to keep up her +reputation for sentimentality; "I would thob my eyth out!" + +"See," quoted the curate, grandiloquently, "how `one touch of nature +makes the whole world kin!'" + +"For my part," exclaimed Miss Spight, who had taken no share in our +conversation since we had dropped personalities, "I don't see the use of +people crying over the fabulous woes of a lot of fictitious persons that +never existed, when there is such an amount of real grief and misery +going on in the world." + +"That is not brought home to us," said Min, courageously; "but the +troubles and trials of the people in fiction are; and I believe that +every kind thought which a writer makes throb through our hearts, better +enables us to pity the sorrows of actual persons." + +"Bai-ey Je-ove!" exclaimed Horner, twisting his eye-glass round and +making an observation for the first time--the discussion before had been +apparently beyond his depth,--"Bai-ey Je-ove! Ju-ust what I was gaw-ing +to say! Bai-ey Je-ove, yaas! But Miss Spight is much above human +emawtion, you know, and all that sawt of thing, you know-ah!" + +"Besides," continued Min, not taking any notice of our friend's original +remark I was glad to see, "one does not always cry over novels. I'm +sure I've laughed more than I've wept over Dickens, and other authors." + +"Ah!" said Lady Dasher, with a melancholy shake of her head, "life is +too serious for merry-making! It is better to mourn than to rejoice, as +I've often heard my poor dear papa say when he was alive." + +"Nonsense, ma!" pertly said her daughter Seraphine; "you can't believe +that. I'm sure I'd rather laugh than cry, any day. And so would you, +too, ma, in spite of your seriousness!" + +"Your mamma is quite right in some respects, my dear," said little Miss +Pimpernell. "We should not be always thinking of nothing but merry- +making. Don't you recollect those lines of my favourite Herrick?-- + + "`Time flies away fast! + The while we never remember, + How soon our life here + Grows old with the year, + That dies in December.'" + +"Yes, I do, you cross old thing!" said the seraph, shaking her golden +locks and laughing saucily; "and I remember also that your `favourite +Herrick' says something else about one's `gathering rose-buds whilst one +may.'" + +"You naughty girl!" said Miss Pimpernell, trying to look angry and frown +at her; but the attempt was such a palpable pretence that we all laughed +at her as much as the delinquent. + +"And what is your favourite style of poetry, Miss Clyde?" asked the +curate, taking advantage of the introduction of Herrick to change the +subject. + +And then there followed a chorus of discussion: Miss Spight declared she +adored Wordsworth: Mr Mawley tried to show off his superiority, and I +attempted to put him down; I believe I was jealous lest Min should agree +with him. + +"Now, Frank," exclaimed Miss Pimpernell, "I will not have any more +sparring between you and Mr Mawley, for I'm sure you've argued enough. +It is `the merry Christmas-time,' you know; and we ought all to be at +peace, and gay and happy, too! What do you say, girls?" + +"But what shall we do to be merry?" asked Bessie Dasher. + +"Ah! my dear," groaned her mother; "it is not right to be foolishly +`merry,' as you call it. This season of the year is a very sad one, and +we ought to be thinking, as my poor dear papa used to say, of what our +Saviour did for us and the other world! We have now arrived at the end +of another year, and it is very sad, very sad!" + +"What!" exclaimed Min, "wrong to be merry at Christmas? The vicar said +in his sermon last Sunday, that our hearts ought to expand with joy at +this time; and that we should try, not only to be glad and happy in +ourselves, but also to make others glad and happy, too. It appears to +me," and her face flushed with excitement as she spoke, "a very +erroneous idea of religion that would only associate it with gloom and +sadness. The same Creator endowed us with the faculty to laugh as well +as cry; and we must take poor comfort in him if we cannot be glad in his +company, to which the Christmas season always brings us nearer and into +more intimate connection, as it were." + +"Bravo, my little champion!" said the vicar, who had again stolen in +unperceived by us all. "That is the spirit of true Christianity. You +have preached a more practical sermon than I, my dear." Then, seeing +her confusion at being thus singled out and her embarrassment at having, +as she thought, been too forward in speaking out impulsively on the spur +of the moment, the vicar created a diversion. "And now, young ladies," +he said, "as we are going to be merry, what shall we play at?" + +"Oh, puss in the corner!" cried Seraphine Dasher. "That will be +delightful!" + +"With all my heart; puss in the corner be it," said the vicar, who could +be a boy again on fitting occasions, and play with the best of us. +"Come, Mawley," he added, "come and exert yourself; and help to pull +these forms out of the way," setting to work vigorously at the same +time, himself. + +In another minute or two we were in the middle of a wild romp, wherein +little Miss Pimpernell and the vicar were the most active participants-- +they showing themselves to be quite as active as the younger hands; +while Miss Spight and Lady Dasher were the only idle spectators. Min at +first did not join in, as she was not accustomed to the ways of us old +habitues, but she presently participated, being soon as gay and noisy as +any. What fun we had in blindfolding Horner, and manoeuvring so that he +should rush into the arms of Miss Spight! What a shout of laughter +there was when he exclaimed, clasping her the while, "Bai-ey Je-ove! +Yaas, I've cawght you at lawst!" + +The look of pious horror which settled on the face of the elderly maiden +was a study. + +Thus our working day ended; and it became time to separate and go home. +I had the further happiness of seeing Min to her door, both of us living +in the same direction. + +It was the same on the morrow, and on the morrow after that, for a whole +week. + +Of course, we did not talk "Shakspeare and the musical glasses" always. +Our discourse was generally composed of much lighter elements, +especially when Mr Mawley and I did not come in contact--argument being +then, naturally, as a dead letter. Our conversation during these +peaceful interregnums mainly consisted in friendly banter, parish news, +and gossip. Scandal Miss Pimpernell never permitted; indeed, no one +would have had the heart to say an ill-natured thing of anybody else in +her presence. + +Day after day Min and I were closely associated together, learning to +know more of one another than we might have acquired in years of +ordinary society intercourse; day after day, I would watch her dainty +figure, and study her beautiful face, and gaze into the fathomless +depths of her honest grey eyes, my love towards her increasing by such +rapid strides, that, at length, I almost worshipped the very ground on +which she trod. + +And so the week wore by, until Christmas Eve arrived. Then our task was +finished, and we decorated Saint Canon's old church with all the wreaths +and garlands, the crosses and illuminations, on which we had been so +busy in the school-room; making it look quite modern in its festal +preparation for the ensuing day, when the result of our handiwork would +be displayed to the admiration, we hoped, of the congregation at large. + +On parting with Min late in the evening at her door--for our work at the +church had occupied us longer than usual--I thought it the happiest +Christmas Eve I had ever passed; and, as I went to bed that night, I +wondered, dreamily, if the morning's sun would rise for another as happy +a day, while I prayed to God that He would shape my life in accordance +with the fervent desire of my heart. + + + +CHAPTER FIVE. + +"JOY." + + "Love took up the glass of Time, and turn'd it in his glowing hands; + Every moment, lightly shaken, ran itself in golden sands. + Love took up the harp of life, and smote on all the chords with might; + Smote the chord of self that, trembling, pass'd in music out of + sight!" + +It was a regular joyous, jolly, old-fashioned Christmas morning: bright, +sparkling, exhilarating. + +Just sufficient snow had fallen during the night to give that semblance +of winter to the house-tops and hedge-rows, with a faint white powdering +of the roadway and pavement, which adds so much to the quondam season of +family gatherings, merrymakings, and plum-pudding; and this, King Frost +had hardened by his patent adamantine process, so that it might not +cause any inconvenience to foot passengers or lose its virgin freshness; +while, at the same time, he decked and bedizened each separate twig and +branch of the poor, leafless, skeleton trees with rare festal jewels and +ear-drops of glittering icicles; besides weaving fantastic devices of +goblin castles and airy, feathery foliage on the window panes, fairy +armies in martial array and delicate gnome-tracery--transforming their +appearance from that of ordinary glass into brilliantly-embroidered +flakes of transparent, lucent crystal. Ah me! Jack Frost is a cunning +enchanter: his will is all-powerful, his taste wondrous. + +The clanging church bells were merrily ringing in "the day of glad +tidings," as our good vicar styled it, when I jumped out of bed and +looked out to see what the weather was like. It was exactly as I could +have wished--if I had had any choice in the matter--Christmas all over! + +A little robin acquaintance, who never omitted his daily call at my +window-ledge for his matutinal crumbs, was stretching his tiny crimson +throat to its fullest extent, with quivering heart-notes of choral song, +from a solitary poplar-tree in the adjacent garden on which my room out- +looked, making the still air re-echo with his melody; my old retriever, +Catch, a good dog and true, was pawing and scratching at the door to be +admitted, in his customary way, and sniffing a cordial welcome, as he +wondered and grumbled, in the most intelligible doggy language, at my +being so late in taking him out for his preprandial walk--when it was +such a fine morning, too! I heard the maid wishing me a cheery "Merry +Christmas, sir!" as she left my hot water; so, it is not to be wondered +that, after I had had the moral courage to plunge into my cold tub, +dressing afterwards in a subsequent glow, I became infected with the +buoyant spirit of all these social surroundings; and felt as light- +hearted and "seasonable" as Santa Claus and his wintry comrades, the +church bells, little robin redbreast, dog Catch, and Bridget the maid, +could either inspire or expect. + +Dog Catch and I sallied forth for our walk--I, cheerful, and drinking in +healthy draughts of the fresh, frosty aether; he with great red tongue +lolling out, as he trotted along in front of me, coming back every +second step and looking up into my face with a broad grin on his jaws +and a roguish glance in his brown eyes--I suppose at some funny canine +joke or other, which he could not permit me to share--or else, darting +backwards and forwards, gleefully barking and making sundry feints and +dashes at me; or, prancing up in his elephantine bounds, with felonious +intentions regarding my walking stick, which he considered he had a much +better right to carry than myself. + +We had lots of meetings and greetings when strolling along. + +First, there was the gardener's dog at the corner, an old chum of +Catch's, who passed the time of day to us with a cheerful bow-wow; +although I was surprised to see that he had not "a posy tied to his +tail," according to the orthodox adage of typical smartness. Then there +was the milkman's dog, a gaunt retriever like mine, but of a very bad +disposition, and a surly brute withal. He and Catch were deadly foes, +as is frequently the case with dogs of the same breed; so, of course, +they could never meet without quarrelling: on this occasion they +exchanged ferocious challenges, and parted with signs and symptoms of +unmitigated contempt on both sides, expressed by growls and barks, tail +risings, and mane upliftings. + +Further on, we encountered Mrs O'Flannagan, an Irish lady, who kept the +fruit stall at the corner by the cross roads. She was dressed, as +neatly as a new pin, in an "illigant" Connemara cloak, which seemed to +be donned for the first time, besides a bran new bonnet; and, thanks to +"elbow grease," her peachy, soap-scrubbed cheeks shone again. She was +returning from early chapel, whither she had gone to mass and +confession; and where I trust she had received absolution for her little +peccadilloes. I've no doubt she _did_ get absolution, for she told me +that Father Macmanus was "a raal gintleman." + +Then Catch chased a roving cat until it got within the neighbouring +shelter of its domiciliary railings, whence it me-ai-ouwed to him, +through all the vowels of pussy's vocabulary, a Christmas compliment-- +with, probably, a curse tacked on to the tail of it, or that "phoo! +phoo! phiz!" meant nothing. But the feline expletives were all thrown +away; for Catch was only "full of fun and with nobody to play with him," +like Peter Mooney's goose, and had only chased pussy in the natural +exuberance of his spirits, having no "hard feelings" towards her, or any +desire, I know, to injure her soft tabby fur. + +We next came across old Shuffler, the house-agent, waddling along, with +his sound eye rolling buoyantly on its axis, while the artificial orb +glared steadily forward in a fixed, glassy stare. + +"Bootiful weether!" said he, cordially, to me, touching his +hat--"bootiful weether, sir!" + +"It _is_ a fine day," I responded. "A merry Christmas to you, Mr +Shuffler." + +"Same to you, sir, and many on 'em," he replied, courteously. + +"Thank you, Shuffler," I said, satisfied with the colloquy, "but I must +now say good day!" + +"Good day, and a 'appy noo year to you," answered he, passing on his +way. Really, everybody appeared to be very civil and good natured to- +day; and everything joyous and rose-coloured! Was it owing to the +bright morning, or to the fact of its being Christmas, or to the sweet +feelings I had lying hidden in my heart anent my darling? + +I cannot tell: can you? + +After a time Catch and I reached the river. It was not now rolling by, +a muddy, silent, whilom sluggish, whilom busy stream. It was quite +transformed in its appearance and resembled more some frozen arctic +stream than the old Thames which I knew so well. Far as the eye could +reach, it was covered with sheets of broken ice, again congealed +together and piled up with snow--so many little bergs, that had been +born at Great Marlow and Hampton, and other spots above the locks; +gradually increasing in size and bulk as they span round and swept by on +the current, until they should reach the bridges below. Then, they +would, perhaps, be formed into one great icefield, stretching from bank +to bank, whereon a grand bullock-roasting festival might be held, or a +fancy fair instituted, as happened in the reign of James, the king, "of +ever pious memory:" that is, if my chronology be right and my memory not +at fault, as may very possibly be the case. + +Doggy did not mind the ice a bit, however. He plunged in, time after +time, to fetch out my in-thrown stick, with a frisky bound; emerging +after the performance with ice-pendants to his glossy, silken ears and +coat smartly curled, as if he had just paid a visit to Truefitt's, and +been manipulated by the dexterous hands of one of the assistants at that +celebrated establishment, armed with the crinal tongs and anybody's best +macassar. + +By-and-by we returned; and whom should I then meet on my way home but, +positively, my eye-glass acquaintance of Downing Street. Fancy his +being out before nine o'clock in the morning! It was an unparalleled +occurrence. + +"Hullo, Horner!" I sang out, "'morning, old fellow. Compliments of the +season!" + +"Bai-ey Je-ove! Lorton, how you stawtled me--'do!" + +"You don't mean to say," I asked, on getting closer to him, "that you've +actually taken to early rising?" + +"No, 'pon honah, I asshaw you, my deah fellah, no!" he replied, quite +excitedly. "No, I asshaw you, no," he repeated. + +"Well, then, what on earth makes you come out at this early unearthly +hour?" I said. + +"Oh--ah! you see--ah, my deah fellah," he answered, "it was all those +confawnded little bahds and the bells kicking up such a raow; that, 'pon +honah, I couldn't sleep and so I came out. I asshaw you it was all +those bweastwy little bahds and the bells!" + +"At all events, I must congratulate you on your reformation," I said. + +"Yaas? But it was all those bweastwy little bahds and the bells, you +know; and it's only once a ye-ah you know, Lorton," he added. + +"So you will never do so again till next time--is that what you mean, +Horner?" I asked. + +"Yaas! But, bai-ey Je-ove, I say, Lorton, my deah fellah, were the +Clydes those ladies in hawf-mawning, eh?" said he, smiling feebly in his +usual suave manner. He thought he had got hold of a grand joke at my +expense. + +However, I was not in the least angry with him. I felt too happy to +have lost my temper with any one, especially Horner, whom I generally +regarded as a poor creature to be tolerated rather than blamed. + +"Did you ever hear, Horner," said I, "how Peabody made his first +fortune?" + +"No, 'pon honah, I asshaw you, no." + +"Well, then, I'll tell you, Horner," said I. "It was by minding his own +business, my dear fellow." + +"Bai-ey Je-ove!" he ejaculated, adding, after a pause, "Weally, Lorton, +you dawn't mean it?" + +"I suppose," I continued, "that you are also just as ignorant again how +Mr Peabody made his second and greater fortune, eh?" + +"Yaas," he drawled out. + +"Ah," said I, "he got _that_ by letting other people's business alone!" + +"Bai-ey Je-ove!" said Horner, quite staggered at this second blow. +"Vewy amusing anecdote, indeed! Thank you, Lorton. Much obwiged, and +all that sawt of thing, for the in-fawmation. Yaas, bai-ey Je-ove! And +so I'll say good day. Good day, Lorton; good day to you!" and he +started off, with a quick step, in the very opposite direction to that +which he had been previously going. I went on homeward, with Catch +following obediently at my heels. + +Which way did we go? + +Can you not guess, or must I have to tell you? + +How very obtuse some persons are! + +Why, by The Terrace, of course. Was it not there that Min lived; and +might I not chance to get a glance from her love-speaking, soft grey +eyes? Only one glance--and I would be amply repaid! + +I passed by her house. Yes, there she was at the window, attending to +her flowers and carefully shielding a much-prized little maidenhair fern +with a bell glass from the rays of the sun, which beamed as though +Phoebus had mistaken the season and thought it a summer day. + +She saw me as I sauntered by, recognising me with a little nod and smile +and a sudden heightening of colour; and came to the door. Of course I +went up the steps and spoke to her. _You_ would have proceeded on your +way with a passing bow? Oh, yes! + +"Good morning, Mr Lorton," she said. "How very early you are out to be +sure! I thought gentlemen were always lazy, but you're an exception to +the rule, it seems;" and her soft grey eyes sparkled. + +"Well, I don't know that, Miss Clyde," I said. "I suppose I'm just as +lazy as the rest. I only came out to give my old doggy a walk and a +dip, as I generally do every morning before breakfast. If it were not +for him, I do not believe I would get up sooner than anybody else; but +he's such a pertinacious fellow that he won't be denied his walk, always +rousing me up at eight o'clock `sharp.' Would you believe it, he brings +my boots up to my door, and it is a trick he taught himself!" + +"Dear old doggy," she said, stooping down and patting his head. "What a +nice sagacious fellow you are! Come here, sir, and give me your paw! +Now, shake hands. Doggy, do you like me?" Catch could tell a friend at +once; so looking up, he licked her hand, expressing, as intelligently as +possible, that he was pleased to make her acquaintance. "How I love +dogs!" she ejaculated, rising up again. + +"Do you!" said I. "Ah, Miss Clyde! `Love me, love my dog.'" + +"What nonsense, Mr Lorton!" she said, with a warm blush tinting her +cheek. "But, I declare you haven't wished me the compliments of the +season yet. How very ungallant you are! I will set you an example--a +merry Christmas, Mr Lorton!" + +"A thousand to you, Miss Clyde; and each happier than the last!" I +said. + +"Oh dear, dear!" she exclaimed in mimic dismay; "I am sure I would not +care about having so many as that! Fancy a thousand Christmases--why, +what an old, old woman I should be then!" + +"And a very nice old woman, too," said I. + +"Merci pour le compliment, Monsieur," she replied, making me an +elaborate curtsey and laughing merrily. "And what have you got there?" +she asked, pointing to a little bunch of violets that I was extracting +from my overcoat pocket, and which I had procured for her when Catch met +his friend the gardener's dog. + +"I got them for you, Miss Clyde," said I, somewhat bashfully; "and-- +and--" + +"Oh, _thank_ you, Mr Lorton," she said, quite pleased. "I love violets +more than any other flower. You could not have given me a nicer +present. I was only wishing for some just now. But, I hear mamma +coming down stairs; so, as I've not made the tea yet, I must go in-- +good-bye!" + +"Good-bye," I echoed, clasping her tiny hand in mine. "Good-bye, and +many good wishes for the day, _my darling_!" I courageously added the +last two words, lowering my voice over them, as she gently closed the +door. + +She was not offended, if she _had_ heard the term of endearment I used, +for she gave me another nice little bow and smile from the window. +Still I think she _did_ hear me. I fancied I saw a conscious look in +the dancing grey eyes, a blush yet lingering on her damask cheek. + +I went home with joy in my heart--joy which fed upon itself and +increased each moment. Don't you remember what Herder says? Let but +the heart once awake, and wave follows wave of newborn feelings-- + + "So bald sich das Herz ergiesst, + Stromt Welle auf Welle!" + +I only know that I was as happy as possible, and astonished everybody by +the breakfast I ate. + +You fancy, perhaps, that I wasn't really in love, or I wouldn't probably +have been hungry? Nonsense! Let me tell you that happy lovers are +always hungry, and have great appetites. It is only your poor, +miserable, disappointed suitors, who are in a state of suspense, that go +about with a hang-dog look and cannot eat. I firmly believe that +Shakespeare intended to convey the idea that Valentine was mad, or he +would never have put into his mouth such ridiculous words as those, that +he could "break his fast, dine, sup, and sleep, upon the very naked name +of love!" If that gentleman of Verona had been sane knowing how his +passion was reciprocated and that his lady loved him in return, he would +have had just as good an appetite as I had that morning; when, joyous as +a bird, I was as hungry as a hunter. + +As for dog Catch, you should have seen how he galloped into his oatmeal +porridge after his walk--how the oatmeal porridge galloped into him +would, however, be a more correct form of expression. You should have +only seen him, that's all! + +Next came church; and, of all occasions when church-going strikes even +an uninterested spectator, generally lacking in religious zeal, with +feelings of unwonted emotion, commend me to Christmas day. Then, to +paraphrase the well-known lines of the poet, those in the habit of being +regularly present at worship "went the more;" while those go now "who +never went before." People make a practice of visiting church on that +day who seldom, if ever, attend a religious service at any other time, +taking the year all through. It is like the wedding feast to which the +lame, the halt, and the blind were invited. Every one goes then; every +class and clan is represented. + +Saint Canon's was a sight. Its garland-twined oaken columns, its +wreath-hung galleries, its scroll-work in the chancel--where "Unto us a +son is born," and the message of glad tidings, which the shepherds of +Bethlehem first heard when they "watched their flocks by night," and saw +the star in the east, two thousand years ago, shone forth in blazonments +of red and purple and gold--all reminded the congregation of the +festival they had assembled to commemorate; the day of peace and good- +will to all, that had dawned for them once more, as I trust it will dawn +again and again for us yet on many more future anniversaries. The +place, too, was crammed, contrary to Lady Dasher's fears concerning the +spread of unbelief and the degeneracy of the present age. Everybody was +there that could go at all, for it was a year in which we had to be +specially mindful of mercies vouchsafed to us. Even old Shuffler, who +had not been seen inside a place of public worship before within the +memory of man, was not an absentee. + +I was not thinking of him, however, nor of the display which the +decorations made, nor of the congregation--indeed, I hardly attended to +the service. All my thoughts were centred on Min. + +A madonna-like face, a pair of honest, steadfast, speaking, grey eyes +were ever before me; although I could not actually see her, except when +we stood up during the service, according to the ordinances of the +rubric, as she sat a long way off. Notwithstanding my usual attachment +towards them, I felt inclined to quarrel with the high pews that hid her +from my sight; and, I'm afraid, despised Bishop Burnet for his +innovation. The vicar, they told me afterwards, preached a simple, +beautiful sermon, that struck home to the hearts of every one present; +but I heard none of it. My sermon was in my heart, and bore for its +text one little word of four letters. O Min, Min! you had a good deal +to answer for. + + "Long was the good man's sermon, + Yet it seemed not so to me; + For he spoke of Ruth the beautiful, + And still I thought of thee. + + "Long was the prayer he uttered, + Yet it seemed not so to me; + For in my heart I prayed with him, + And still I thought of thee!" + +After service, of course everybody met everybody else, each of their own +respective little world, at the church door, exchanging those good +wishes and seasonable greetings proper to the day. + +There was a grand throng without the porch. Horner was there. It would +have been nothing at all without him and his eye-glass. He did not +appear to bear me any hard feelings, I was glad to see, for my +unkindness of the morning. He nodded affably, and said "'do!" to me, in +his usual way, as if he had not met me before. + +Min and her mother did not linger as did the other parishioners; so, I +had only an opportunity of a passing bow, without that other tender +little hand-clasp which I had hoped for. But she looked at me, and that +was something. + +Lady Dasher, however, stopped for a minute or two; so did her daughters. + +"Beautiful weather for Christmas, Lady Dasher," hazarded I. She +evidently did not agree with me, for she looked about her mournfully, +with a down-drawn visage, just as if we were all attending a funeral, of +which she was the chief mourner. + +"Really, Mr Lorton, do you think so?" came her answer at length. +"Don't you find it very cold?" + +"Dear me, ma! why you said last Christmas that it was too warm!" said +her daughter Bessie. + +"Ah! Mr Lorton," continued her mother, not noticing her remark, "we +never have those good, old-fashioned Christmases that we had when my +poor dear papa was alive!" + +"No, I suppose not," I answered; "people say that it is because of the +vast American forests being gradually cut down, admitting freer currents +of air all over the world; while others put the change down to the +influence of the Gulf Stream. Still, I dare say, it will all come right +again at some time or other." + +"Ah, Mr Lorton," said Lady Dasher, "I'm afraid it will _never_ come +right again. You are too sanguine, like all young people." + +"Oh, `never' is a long day," I said; "we should all be hopeful and +merry, I think, at least on this one day in the year." + +"I could never be merry again, Mr Lorton," she said, with a prodigious +sigh, which seemed to come from the depths of her heart, "since poor +dear papa died;" and she then passed on mournfully homewards, with +Bessie and Seraphine in her wake. Their cheerful faces, as they nodded +back and smiled at Horner and myself, contrasted strongly with their +mother's lugubrious visage. I wonder if anybody ever saw her laugh? +I've got my doubts about it. + +Then came out Miss Pimpernell, her kind old face beaming with smiles as +she bowed here and there, and gave a cordial greeting to us young +fellows, who still stood around the church porch. She did not forget +me, you may be certain. "God bless you, Frank, my boy!" she said, in +her affectionate, purring way; dismissing me home with a light heart to +eat the traditionary roast turkey and plum-pudding, at peace with all +mankind, and in love with all womankind for her sake. + +What a happy, happy day it had been! + +That night I passed and repassed Min's house a dozen times at least, +only that I might see her shadow on the blinds, weaving luxurious +castles in Spain the while. I would be a great general, a distinguished +orator, a famous statesman, a celebrated author! I would do some grand, +heroic action. I desired to be "somebody," something, only great and +glorious! And yet, as One above is my judge, I had not one selfish +craving, not a single purely-personal thought in connection with these +mad wishes. It was but for _her_ sake that I longed for honour and fame +and advancement. Only for her, only for her! + + + +CHAPTER SIX. + +"ECSTASY!" + + "...From thy rose-red lips my name + Floweth; and then, as in a swoon, + With dinning sound my ears are rife, + My tremulous tongue faltereth, + I lose my colour, I lose my breath, + I drink the cup of a costly death, + Brimm'd with delirious draughts of warmest life!" + +Some few days after Christmas, little Miss Pimpernell gave a small +evening party for the especial delectation of those who had so +meritoriously assisted in the decoration of the church. + +Of course, it was not at all like the "barty" the celebrated Hans +Breitman "giv'd" to his friends for the imbibition of "lager beer" ad +libitum; but still, one may feel inclined to exclaim, in the exquisite +broken words of that worthy, "Where am dat barty now?" For, time has +worked its usual changes; and all of us have long since been divided, +separated, scattered, and dispersed to the four winds of heaven, so to +speak, to the severance of old ties, and all kindred associations. + +I had not had the slightest inkling that the "little affair" was about +to "come off" beforehand. I had met Miss Pimpernell out the very +morning of the day on which it took place; yet--sly old lady that she +was--she hardly gave me a hint of her social intent. + +She certainly said that she had a little surprise in store for me; but +when I pressed her to learn what that "something" was, she preserved a +provoking reticence, declining to enlighten me any further. "No, +Frank," she said in her cheery way, "it is of no use your trying to coax +me with your `dear Miss Pimpernell,' or think to flatter me into +divulging my news by false compliments paid to my shabby old bonnet! +No, you shall hear it all in good time, so don't be impatient. I won't +tell you another word now, my boy, there!" she added finally, trotting +off on her parochial rounds and leaving me in suspense until the +evening, to exercise my imagination regarding her contemplated +"surprise." + +Then, however, I was let into the secret; and the party was all the more +pleasurable from coming quite unexpectedly. I always like doing things +on the spur of the moment, without premeditation. If you look out for +anything long beforehand, it is apt to pall on the palate when it +arrives within your reach. "Unlooked-for blessings" are generally twice +as grateful as those which you are led to expect--so, at least, I have +found them. + +On my return home from a walk in the evening, I found a little note of +invitation awaiting me, in which Miss Pimpernell requested me to come +round to the vicarage precisely at eight, "dressed all in my best," like +the impassioned lover of "Sally in our Alley," as she "expected a few +friends." She added in a postscript, underlined with one of her +characteristic dashes, that _Miss Clyde_ would be there, if that would +be any further inducement for me. + +Oh Miss Pimpernell, you machiavellian old lady! I would not have +thought you could have practised such great dissimulation. Would Min's +presence be any further inducement to me! Wouldn't it? Oh, dear no, +certainly not! + +In ten minutes' time I was dressed en regle and at the vicarage. + +It was quite a nice little party. Not one too many, and not a single +discordant element. Old ladies and gentlemen seemed to have been +rigidly tabooed, with the exception, naturally, of our host and hostess, +the vicar and his sister; for Lady Dasher, owing to some fortunate +conjuncture of circumstances, was unable to come: Miss Spight was busy +at home, entertaining an elderly relative who had suddenly thrown +herself on her hospitality; while Mr Mawley was at Oxford enjoying the +season with sundry dogmatic Fellows of his own calibre. Minus these +charmers, our gathering was pretty much what it had been down in the old +school-room at the decorations. There were the Dasher girls, two young +collegians from Cambridge--ex-pupils of the vicar--to entertain Bessie +and Seraphine, Lizzie Dangler, Horner with his inseparable eye-glass and +faultless toilet, Baby Blake for _his_ entertainment--Miss Pimpernell +was a wise caterer--Min, and myself. + +Our hostess had so planned that we should all pair off, each lady having +her cavalier, as she said, in the good old-fashioned way. She planned +very ably, as we had one of the pleasantest evenings imaginable, without +any stiffness or formality or being forced to make a toil of enjoyment, +in the customary manner of most fashionable reunions: we were not +"fashionable," thank goodness. But we had "a good time" of it, as young +America says, all the same. + +What did we do? + +Well, then, there were none of those abominable "round games," which, +unless they descend to vulgar romping, are the dreariest attempts at +conviviality possible to conceive; none of those dreadful and much-to- +be-avoided exactions and remissions of "forfeits," that plunge everybody +into embarrassing situations, and destroy, instead of creating, +sociability; none of those stock--so-called--"drawing-room +entertainments;" in fact, which always result in hopeless boredom. But, +we had a little music and part-singing: a little lively, general chit- +chat, in which all could join and each take a share: a few anecdotes +well told--a complete success, to be brief, in making us all feel +perfectly natural and at ease, for we were allowed to do and say exactly +what we pleased in moderation. + +Each of us was made to feel that his or her absence would have detracted +from the happiness of the rest; and _that_ is the true art of treating +one's guests--an art which both the vicar and Miss Pimpernell had +apparently studied to perfection, although it really proceeded from +their natural good-heartedness. + +But, amongst our company I had almost forgotten to enumerate the name of +Monsieur Parole d'Honneur, one of the nicest of French emigres and a +dear friend of the vicar's; one known to most of us, also, for many +years. + +Perhaps you may chance to remember the noise that the great Barnard +extradition case made in the newspapers--and, indeed, all over England +too, for that matter--in the year 1859? + +You don't? Why, it nearly led to a war between France and Britain! Did +you never hear how the fiercely-moustachioed Gallic colonels swaggered +about the Boulogne cafes, loud in their denunciations of perfidious +Albion, while smoking their endless cigarettes and sipping their +poisonous absinthe; and how, but for the staunch fidelity of the ill- +fated Emperor Napoleon--since deserted by his quondam ally--and the +jaunty pluck of our then gallant premier, brave "old Pam"--whose loss we +have had ample reason, oftentimes of late, to deplore--there might have +been a sudden rupture of that "entente cordiale" between the two +nations, which was cemented in the Crimea, and expired but a couple of +years ago under the besieged walls of Paris? + +Ah! that was a time when the whilom "Cupid's" boast, "Civis Anglicanus +sum," was not an empty claim, as it is in these days of poverty-stricken +"retrenchments," and senile forfeitures of all that made England great +and grand through five hundred years of history! + +But the Barnard case--you must have heard of that, surely? It was just +about the period when the wonderful volunteer fever commenced to rage +with such intense earnestness over here; and when our "valuable +auxiliary forces"--as amateur military critics in the House are so fond +of repeating--were first instituted, in the fear of a second invasion of +this sacred realm of liberty. We did not then place much reliance on +the "streak of silver sea," when in the direct face of danger, as a +great "statesman" would have us do now that it no longer confronts us! +Ha, at last you recollect, eh? I need not prompt your memory any +further. + +Bien. It was at this period that Monsieur Parole d'Honneur was advised +in high official circles that it would be for the benefit of his health +if he quitted French soil for awhile. He had been known to have once +been intimately associated with Mazzini, and that gentleman was supposed +to be implicated in the Orsini affair--when an attempt was made against +Napoleon's life in the Place d'Opera; so, as Parole d'Honneur had +likewise been heard to speak rather unguardedly at a political club of +patriots to which he belonged, the prefectorial mind "putting that and +that together," very reasonably presumed that our friend must have some +connection with the bomb conspirators. The consequences were, that +Parole d'Honneur was told to quit Paris instantly, and leave France +itself within four-and-twenty hours,--although he was innocent of the +slightest knowledge concerning the plot. + +However, there was no help for it. Prefects are not in the habit of +discussing their suspicions with suspected persons; and thus he had to +bid adieu to his country in a hurry. He thereupon shook off its dust +from his papier-mache-soled boots, coming to England, in the manner of +his compatriots, to earn his livelihood as a teacher of languages. + +Having the highest recommendations, he easily obtained as much +employment as he wanted, and devoted himself to giving conversational +lectures to a circle of collegiate establishments lying in different +parts of London, which he visited bi-weekly, or so, in turn. Amongst +these was one in our suburb; hence, first an acquaintance and then a +lasting friendship sprung up between him and the vicar, both taking to +each other immensely through their large-hearted philosophy; thus, too, +I also got acquainted with one of the brightest, cheeriest, kindest +Gauls of many that I have had the happiness of knowing. + +At the time of which I write, Parole d'Honneur was a very happy emigre, +despite his enforced exile in the land of fogs. Indeed, he was an exile +no longer in the strict sense of the word, as he had received permission +to go back to France whenever he pleased; a permission of which he had +already availed himself, having paid a visit, in company with me, to +Paris, the previous month, at the time when I had been so miserable and +despondent about not meeting Min again. However, he had become so fond +of England and things English, from his long enforced residence here, +that he avowed his determination of living and dying amongst us--that +is, unless his country and "the cause" should have need of his services. + +On the evening of Miss Pimpernell's little party, this patriotic +gentleman, in the presence of ladies, whom he reverenced with a knight- +errant's devotion and homage, was the life of our circle. He carried an +aroma of fun and light-heartedness about him that was simply contagious. +He sang Beranger's ditties with a verve and elan that brought back +bonny Paris and student days to those of us who were acquainted with +them. One moment he played exquisite bits from Mozart on his violin, to +the accompaniment of the vicar's violoncello, that were most entrancing; +the next, scraped away at some provoking tarantella that almost set the +whole of us dancing, in defiance of the proprieties generally observed +at the vicarage. + +We were asking each other riddles and conundrums. Monsieur Parole +suddenly bethought him of one. "Ah, ha!" he said, "I heard one good +reedel ze ozer day. A leetle mees at one of my academies told it me. +Young ladies, why is ze old gentlemans, le diable, zat is--" + +"O-oh! Monsieur Parole!" ejaculated Miss Pimpernell. + +"Your pardon, Mees Peemple," said Monsieur Parole--he never could give +her the additional syllable to her name--"Your pardon, Mees Peemple; but +we wiz call hims somesing else. Why is--ah, ha! I have got hims. Why +is Lucifers like, when riding sur un souris, on a mouse, like the very +same tings? You gives him up? Ah, ha! I t'ought you would never guess +him!" he continued, on our professing our ignorance of the solution. +"Because he is synonime!--vat you calls sin-on-a-mouse! Ha, ha, ha!" +and he burst into a chuckle of his merry laughter. + +This reminded Horner of one. "Bai-ey Je-ove!" he said, after a long +pause. "I--ah, came akwass a vewy good one the othah day--ah. A blind +beggah had a bwoth-ah, and the bwoth-ah died; now, what welation was-- +ah, the blind beggah to the--ah, dead beggah?" + +"His sister, of course," said Bessie Dasher, promptly. + +"Weally," said Horner, who usually put on most of his _w_ and _r_ ish +airs when in the presence of ladies in evening costume: in the day he +sometimes spoke more plainly. "Weally, how clevah you ah! I asshaw +you, I didn't gwess it for neawy a week--ah!" + +"I can quite believe _that_!" said Seraphine, wickedly. + +"Did you ever hear any of Praed's charades?" I asked Min. + +"No," she said. "Do you recollect some?" + +"Ah," put in the vicar, "Praed was a clever fellow; and a true poet, +too." + +"Indeed?" said Min. "I have heard his name, but I've never seen +anything that he wrote. Do you recollect any of his charades, Mr +Lorton?" she asked again, turning to me. + +"I think I remember one," I said, repeating those three spirited verses +which are well-known, beginning "Come from my First, ay, come!" + +"How beautiful the lines are!" said Min; "but it seems a pity that they +should be thrown away on a mere charade." + +"That was exactly Praed's way," said the vicar. "I remember well, when +I was a young man at college, what a stir his name made, and what great +things were predicted of him, that he never lived to realise." + +"He died young, did he not?" asked Min. + +"Yes," said the vicar, "in his thirty-second year. If he had lived, he +would probably have been one of the foremost men in England to-day." + +"`Whom the gods love, die young,'" quoted I grandiloquently, like +Mawley. + +"True," said the vicar. "There is more philosophy in that, than in most +of those old Pagan beliefs: there is a glimmering of Christianity about +the saying." + +"I wonder," said Miss Pimpernell, "whether there is any connection +between it and the text, `Whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth'?" + +"I can't say, my dear," said the vicar, "if you are right in this +instance; but there is often a great similarity between different parts +of the Bible and the utterances of profane writers." + +"Have you ever noticed, sir," said Min, "how David says in the Psalms +that `all the foundations of the world are out of course;' while +Shakespeare makes Hamlet observe that `the world is out of joint'?" + +"Yes," said the vicar, "and there are many other parallels that could be +drawn from Shakespeare. He was frequently indebted to the inspired +volume for his reflections; whether wittingly or unknowingly, I cannot +say." + +"I think," said I, "that Douglas Jerrold's celebrated bon mot about +Australia must be put down to the same source. He said, if you +remember, speaking of the prolific nature of the soil of the new +continent, `Tickle her with a hoe, and she will laugh with a harvest;' +and in the Psalms we have the verse, `The valleys also shall stand so +thick with corn, that they shall laugh and sing.'" + +"It is debatable," said the vicar, "whether we should ascribe these +striking resemblances to unconscious plagiarism or to similarity of +thought." + +"We will have to agree with Solomon," said I, "that there is nothing new +under the sun!" + +"True enough, Frank," said the vicar. "From the explorations at Nineveh +and at Pompeii, we have already learnt that the ancients well knew of +what we in our pride long ascribed to modern inquiry and research." + +Miss Pimpernell here calling upon her brother and Monsieur Parole for +some more of their concerted music, they sat down to a sonata of +Beethoven. The remainder of us broke up into little coteries; Min and I +having a long quiet talk, under cover of the deep tones of the vicar's +violoncello, in a corner by the piano, where we entrenched ourselves for +some time undisturbed. + +What did we say? + +I'm sure I can't tell you. Probably we talked about the weather and the +crops; the prospects of the coming season; the expected new tenor at the +opera, who was said to rival Orpheus and put Mario into the shade; or, +peradventure, we discussed political economy, grumbling over the high +price of meat and the general expenses of housekeeping! But, please put +yourself in our place, and you will be able, I have no doubt, to imagine +all we could possibly have found to chat about, much better, probably, +than I can describe it. I will merely say for your guidance, without +entering into details, that it was happiness, rapture to me, to be only +beside her--will that enlighten you at all? + +Later on, came supper. + +After that we had some part-singing of good old glees, like "The Chough +and Crow," "Here in cool Grot," and the ever-beautiful "Dawn of Day." +We then separated, after the pleasantest of evenings, when it was close +on midnight:--Miss Pimpernell's party had been emphatically a social +success. + +Of course I walked home with Min. I had been so much with her of late, +that I somehow or other began to look upon her as my own property; and +was jealous of the interference of anyone else. You should have seen +how I glared at Horner when he suggested, good-naturedly enough, that +Min should go round, by the way that the Dasher girls and the others +went, under his escort! How overjoyed I was when she politely declined +the offer, saying that, as her mamma was sitting up for her, she must +hurry home by the shortest way! + +She looked like a little fairy, tripping along beside me through the +fresh-looking frozen snow, her dark dress and scarlet petticoat showing +out in strong relief against the glittering white of the roadway. The +moon was shining brightly, so that it was as light as day; and I could +see her face distinctly as she looked up into mine every now and then to +answer some remark. Her honest, lustrous, grey eyes sparkled with fun, +while a little ripple of silvery laughter came occasionally from the +rosebud-parted coral lips! We chatted merrily, exchanging notes +touching the enjoyments of the evening. + +We gradually approached her door. I was telling her that, instead of +mere days, I seemed to have known her for years and could not affect to +treat her as a stranger. + +She said that she looked upon me almost as an old friend already. + +I asked her if she would let me abandon the formal appellation of "Miss +Clyde," and call her "Min?" + +She said, "Yes." + +I asked her then, ere the door opened, on wishing her "good-bye," with a +lingering hand-clasp, whether she would not call me by my Christian +name, too? + +She gently whispered, "Frank"--so softly, so faintly, that the night- +wind, sighing by, could not catch the accents and bear the sound to +alien ears; but _I_ heard it, and my heart throbbed in a delirious +tempest of happiness; I lost my senses almost: my head swam in a +whirlwind of tumultuous joy: I was intoxicated with ecstasy! + +"Good-night, Frank!" I heard her dear, sweet voice whispering, like +strains of music in my heart, as I went homewards. I seemed to feel her +warm violet breath still on my cheek. I could fancy I yet gazed into +the star-depths of her soul-speaking, deep, grey eyes. + +"Good-night, Frank!" The words sang in my ears all night, and I slept +in fairyland. + + + +CHAPTER SEVEN. + +DOUBT. + + "Thro' light and shadow thou dost range, + Sudden glances sweet and strange, + Delicious spites and darling angers, + And airy forms of flitting change." + +I had not yet had an opportunity of being introduced to Min's mother. + +'Pon my word, you exclaim, this looks very serious! + +I beg to differ from you. We had been brought together legitimately +enough, down at the church-decoration-gathering in the school-room: we +had been regularly introduced by no less a clerical authority than +little Miss Pimpernell, the vicar's sister: we had then and there +associated under the safest chaperonage--good heavens! would not Miss +Spight's jealous green eyes, that were certain to pick out the tiniest +blot in her fellow man or woman, and Lady Dasher's stately, albeit +melancholy presence, satisfy you? Thus, the "convenances," that horrid +Anglo-French pseudonym, of the still more horrible bugbear "society," +had no cause to consider themselves neglected and find an excuse for +taking umbrage. From this point, our acquaintanceship naturally and +gradually ripened. We got intimate: it was our fate, I suppose--what +more or less would you have expected? + +Besides, although, mind you, I do not consider myself in any way bound +to allay your curiosity and satisfy your compunctious scruples, you +should remember that all of us young parishioners of Saint Canon's-- +Horner, Baby Blake, Lizzie Dangler and the rest--had known each other +almost from the distant days of childhood; and, consequently, were in +the habit of _tutoyer_-ing one another, using our respective "given" +names in familiar conversation. The habit may be a bad one, it is true, +but you cannot prevent it sometimes. There is no practice so capable of +imitation as that of calling one another by the Christian name. It is +just like that of the monkeys all cleaning their teeth along the banks +of the Amazon with pieces of stick, because they saw Professor Agassiz +setting them an example one fine morning, when engaged on his toilet in +company with a tooth-brush. You can't help yourself: you must bow to +the custom and follow suit. + +In this instance, there was Miss Pimpernell, always addressing _her_ as +"Min," and _me_ as "Frank." The Dasher girls and others soon learnt to +do the same. What more likely than that we ourselves should fall into a +similar friendly system? It was only reasonable; and a result which +even a less alert person than yourself would have looked for. At all +events, neither of us meant any harm by it; and I am willing to "take my +affidavit" to that effect any day you please to name, in any Court of +Justice you may appoint. + +Notwithstanding the intimate footing that now existed between Min and +myself, the fact of my non-acquaintance with her mother, annoyed me +extremely. You need not flatter yourself, however. It was not in the +least on account of any conscientious qualms, like yours. + +I wished to know her personally from a totally different motive; and +yet, in spite of all attempts and stratagems on my part, I never could +get a chance of meeting her when I was in the company of some kind +friend to act as go-between and soothe the exigencies of introduction; +although, when alone I would encounter her frequently. This was very +vexing--especially so after a while; and I'll tell you how it was. + +As the days flew by, and the new year, born in a moment, grew with giant +strides in that hasty growth common to all new years--they have a habit +of shooting ahead the first few months of their existence, as if they +desired to "force the pace," and make all the "running" they can--my +facilities for intercourse with Min became "small by degrees and +beautifully less." There you have the cause of my annoyance at once. + +I could see her at the window, certainly. I also frequently passed her +mother and herself in the street, or on The Terrace, or along the +Prebend's Walk, when I was taking an airing abroad with dog Catch at my +heels; yet, I don't know how it was, but I invariably chanced to be on +the opposite side of the street, or road, or terrace, whenever I thus +passed them. I never failed to receive the timid little bow and smile +from Min, with a rosy heightening of her complexion the while--to which +I had now got so accustomed that, should I have been debarred from their +receipt, I would have considered myself very hardly used and felt a +morbid inclination to go mad and drown myself. But, Min's bow was +hardly sufficient to introduce me to her mother, even if people could be +introduced from opposite sides of roads. Thus it was that I remained a +stranger to Mrs Clyde, and did not have a chance of meeting her +daughter and talking to her, as I might have done if I could but have +visited her at home. + +I never was able to have a word with her now, never could hear her +darling voice repeat my name in those soft accents I loved so well. It +was very hard--very hard, indeed! You see, I had ample reasons, beyond +the requirements of mere social etiquette, for wishing to know Mrs +Clyde. + +Our suburb, you must know, was an extremely quiet place--"remote, +unfriended, solitary, slow." + +Although everybody knew everybody, who happened to be anybody at all, +there was not much of current sociability and party giving. We were not +sociable. On the contrary, we were a very humdrum lot; rising early and +going to town to our business and daily toil--such of us as had any sort +of business to attend to--and coming back at a fixed regular hour. We +were in the habit of having our respective dinners and teas, and, +mayhap, suppers, at certain appointed times and seasons--also duly +regulated--and subsequently going to bed, to recruit for the same +routine on the morrow, without any excitements, or renovation and +destruction of tissue worth speaking of. + +A "tea-party" was quite a sensation in the parish of Saint Canon's-- +equivalent to one of the queen's garden fetes. Beyond school treats and +working parties, to which latter only the clergy and Lady Dorcases were +admitted, and the anniversary of Christmas, when we sometimes _did_ +indulge a little in wholesome but subdued gaiety, we went on from year's +beginning to year's end without balls, or dinners, or dances, or any of +those resources which fashionable people have for killing time and +keeping up acquaintanceship. + +We were not "high-toned" people; quite the reverse, in fact, as, I +believe, I have previously described. We only "dropped in" of an +evening to see friends, and spend a quiet hour or two over bezique and +music. On these occasions, a carpet cotillon or quadrille has been +sometimes indulged in; but it was the exception and not the rule. We +were generally satisfied with much milder pastime; our visits rarely +exceeding the interval between tea and "supper" time, when we partook of +a friendly, though seedy, abernethy and glass of wine or beer; and then +went home virtuously to bed. + +Our society being thus constituted, it became a matter almost of +impossibility to meet any one particular person frequently, excepting +out in the street, unless you had the entree of their house. Hence, I +never could chat with Min, as I had done at the decorations; and, +naturally, I felt very much aggrieved thereanent. + +What made it additionally provoking to me was, that Horner had contrived +to get introduced to Mrs Clyde almost as soon as she had settled in the +place, before I had returned from Paris; and there was Mr Mawley the +curate, too, exercising the privilege of his cloth by continually +frequenting her house. He drove me to desperation by going in and out, +apparently just as the fancy suited him, as if he were a tame cat about +the place. + +His conduct was perfectly odious--that is, to any right-thinking person. + +Curates and cousins are, I consider, two of the greatest obstacles to an +innocent layman's intimacy with the diviner portion of creation; and, in +these days of reform and disestablishment, of hereditary and other +conservative grievances, something ought to be done to abolish the +persons in question, or at least handicap them so that other deserving +young men might have a fair chance in the race for beauty's smile and +Hymen's chain. They have an enormous advantage, at present, over +outside men-folk. Girls like to have a sort of good-natured lap-dog +about them, to play with occasionally and run their errands, "do this" +and "that" for the asking--like Cornelius the centurion's obedient +servant--and make himself generally useful, without looking for any +ulterior reward on account of services rendered. You see, cousins and +curates are regarded as "harmless"--"detrimentals with the chill off," +so to speak. His scrap of relationship throws a glimmer of possession +around the one, endowing with inherent right every act of his ministry; +while his "cloth" invests the other with a halo of sanctity and Platonic +freedom that disarms gossip of the usual clothes-peg whereon it hangs +its scandal. "Cousin Tom"--by-the-way, did you ever read Mackworth +Praed's lines on the same theme?--is allowed opportunities for, and +latitude in, flirtation, which poor Corydon, not a cousin never so +remote, may sigh in vain for; and, who would be so despicable as to +impute secular motives to the Reverend Hobplush's tender ministrations +towards those sweet young "sisters," who dote on his sucking sermons and +work him carpet slippers and text-markers without limit? Certainly, not +I. + +I do not mean to say, however, that curates and cousins have it all +their own way always. There's a sweet little cupid who "sits up aloft," +like Jack's guardian angel, to watch o'er the loves of poor laymen. +Still, it is very galling, to one of an ardent temperament especially, +to mark the anxious solicitude with which "Cousin Tom" may hang over the +divine creature--whom you can only look upon from afar as some distant +star--without attracting any observations anent his "attentions." The +confounded airs of possession he gives himself, while you are +languishing "out in the cold," in the expressive vernacular, are +frightful to contemplate. As for curate Hobplush, he may drop in +whenever he pleases, being treated like one of the family circle; while +you, miserable creature, can only call at stated intervals, always +dreading the horrid possibility of out-staying your welcome, and +receiving the metaphorical "cold shoulder"--though love may prompt you +to the sacrifice. + +Such was my position now. + +There was Mr Mawley visiting at Mrs Clyde's house some half-a-dozen +times a week, for all I knew to the contrary--and of course I imagined +the worst--and having endless chances and opportunities of conversing +with my darling, in the morning, at noontide, and at night; while poor, +wretched _I_ had to content myself with a passing bow and smile when we +chanced to meet abroad, or I should happen to see her dainty figure at +the window as I promenaded past her house. + +You say I ought to have considered myself lucky to get even that slight +modicum of notice? + +But I did _not_ so consider myself. I was not by any means contented. +Where did you ever find a lover worth his salt who was? + +To tell the truth, I was horribly jealous of Mawley. He was not at all +a bad-looking fellow; and, with all his dogmatic tone and love of +argument, had a wonderfully taking way with ladies. Besides, his +connection with the Church gave him a considerable pull over me--girls +are so impressionable, as a rule, with regard to nice young curates, +that they generally have the pick of the parish! Really, all things +considered, I'm very much afraid that I had not that kind Christian +feeling and charity in my heart towards Mawley that the vicar had +enjoined in his Christmas sermon. I did not regard the curate even with +that reverence which his Oxford waistcoat should have inspired. I +believe that at that particular time I looked upon him with somewhat of +the same feeling with which the homicidal Cain regarded his brother Abel +about the sacrificing business. + +Then, there was Horner, too, who was generally looked upon as an +"eligible" person, having a respectable position of his own in addition +to considerable expectations from his rich uncle, as I told you before. +I could see that Mrs Clyde encouraged him. He was always going there, +and frequently walking out with them also. I saw him, and it made my +heart bitter. One evening, I met him in full costume, with an opera- +glass slung round his shoulders, just before he reached their door. He +told me that Mrs Clyde had asked him to accompany her daughter and +herself to Covent Garden and share their box. They would have waited a +considerable time, I thought, before they would have been invited to +share _his_! I watched them drive off, and I went home mad. It was +getting too grievous for mortal to bear. + +The house felt suffocating to me that evening. I could not stop in. I +determined to go and call on my old friend Miss Pimpernell, and see what +she could do to cheer me up. + +"My dear boy," she said, as I entered the parlour, where she sat darning +the vicar's socks by the light of a moderator lamp, which stood on a +little table close beside her. "My dear boy, what is the matter with +you? You look quite haggard, and like a wild man from the woods! Have +you had your tea yet? I can ring for some in a moment." + +"No, pray don't, thank you," I answered. "Miss Pimpernell," I +continued, in a determined voice, "I have had tea enough to-night to +last me for a twelvemonth! I can't bear this any longer. You must +introduce me to Mrs Clyde. I have never been able as yet to make her +acquaintance, and I want to go to her house as Horner does, and that +fellow Mawley." + +"Hush, my dear boy!" she said, in her soothing way, as if she were +stroking me down the back like she stroked her tabby Tom--one of the +mousiest and most petted of cats. "You should not speak so of a +clergyman, my dear Frank. Think what the vicar would say if he heard +you!" + +"Oh, never mind Mr Mawley," I said, somewhat petulantly; "I want to +know Mrs Clyde." + +"Ah! that's what's the matter, is it, Frank? Then why did you not come +to old Sally before?" + +"Well, Miss Pimpernell," I replied, "I never thought of you until to- +night." + +"Never thought of me! You _are_ ungallant, Master Frank! But think of +me next time, my dear boy, whenever you find yourself in a difficulty; +and if Sally Pimpernell can help you out of it, she will, you may +depend!" + +"Oh, thank you, dear Miss Pimpernell! And when will you introduce me to +Mrs Clyde?" I asked, thinking it best to "strike the iron" whilst it +was "hot." + +"Come round to-morrow afternoon, Frank," she replied. "She is going to +be here by appointment, to see me about some charity in which she is +interested; and I'll try and manage it for you then." + +"I'll be here, Miss Pimpernell, without fail," I said. "I can never be +sufficiently obliged to you, if you do it." + +"All right, my boy," she said. "I'm sure I shall be very glad to help +you in such a trifling matter. But I do not want any of your soft +speeches, Frank! Keep them for somebody else who will appreciate them +better;" and she laughed her cheery, merry laugh, wishing me good-night +and sending me home much easier in my mind and happier than I had been +for many days past. + +On the following afternoon I was introduced, as my old friend had +promised; and you may be certain that I tried to make myself as +agreeable as I could be to Min's mother. I think I succeeded, too; for, +when I took my leave early, in order to allow Miss Pimpernell and her +visitor an opportunity of discussing the best way of relieving the +parish poor, Mrs Clyde gave me an invitation. + +"Mr Lorton," said she, "I should be glad if you would come round and +see us on Wednesday evening--I think you know our address? My daughter +is going to have a few friends in for a little music; and we shall both +be happy if you will join us. Miss Pimpernell tells me you are very +musical." + +"With great pleasure," I answered, in society's stock phraseology. With +the "greatest" pleasure, I might have said, as I could almost have +jumped for joy. Just fancy! all that I had longed for was accorded in a +moment. My good fairy must undoubtedly have been hovering about the +vicarage premises that day; and I strongly suspect my good fairy in this +instance, as was the case also in many other circumstances of my life, +being none other than my very unfairylike old friend, little Miss +Pimpernell, the vicar's kind-hearted sister. + +Did I not look forward to Wednesday evening? Did I not, when the time +for me to dress at last came round after an excruciatingly long +interval, bestow the most elaborate and unheard-of pains on my toilet, +almost rivalling Horner's generally unimpeachable "get up"? Did I not +proceed in the utmost joy and gladness towards the habitation of my +darling? + +I should rather think I did! + +And yet, when I crossed the threshold of Miss Clyde's house, I was +seized with a sudden vague impression of uneasiness. I felt a, to me, +singular sensation of nervousness, shyness, "mauvais honte"--just as if +a cold key had been put down my back--for which I was at a loss to +account. Those who know me say that bashfulness is one of the least of +my virtues; and, I do not think that I am constitutionally timid--so why +this feeling? Was it not a foreboding of evil? I believe it was, for +everything went wrong with me that night, instead of my having a surfeit +of pleasure, as I had sanguinely expected. + +"Hope told a flattering tale." My good fairy deceived me. My +unpropitious star was again in the ascendant. + +In fact, my bad genius reigned supreme, in spite of such counteracting +influences as my being at last admitted to Min's home and permitted to +watch her gliding movements about the room, hear her liquid voice, catch +the bright looks from her glancing grey eyes, speak to her, smile with +her, adore her. + +Yes, in spite of all this, my bad influence reigned supreme; and, I'm +afraid, something wrong must have been done at my baptism to disgust my +better genii. + +In the first place, I arrived too soon, which was a calamity in itself. +There is always pardon for one who goes late to an evening party--nay, +it often enhances his reputation. Absolution may even be extended to +the calculating individual who ravenously times his arrival by the +supper hour; but, for a simple-minded person, unaccustomed to the usages +of polite society, to believe in the invariability of fixed appointments +and, taking an invitation au pied de la lettre, make his appearance a +full hour before any other guest would dare to "turn up," from the fear +of being thought unfashionable, is simply monstrous! His behaviour is +perfectly inexcusable; and, as a punishment, he should in future be +compelled for a certain time to dine at our Saxon forefathers' early +hour, and go to bed at the sound of the curfew bell instituted by their +Norman conquerors--that is how I would teach him manners! + +I committed this grievous fault on the present occasion. I had been so +anxious to get there in good time and not miss a minute of Min's +charming company, that, like our friend Paddy who ate his breakfast over +night in order to save time in the morning, I overdid it, arriving there +too early. I saw this at once from Mrs Clyde's face when I was +announced, the unhappy premier of all the coming guests. + +Perhaps it was only my fancy, as I'm extremely sensitive on such points, +for she received me courteously enough, pressing the welcoming cup of +coffee and hospitable muffin in an adjoining ante-room on my notice; +but, I thought I could perceive, below the veneer of social civility, a +sort of "how-tiresome-of-you-to-come-before-anybody-else" look in her +eyes, which made me extremely small in my own estimation. + +It was a horrible interval waiting for the other guests to come and +support me. I made a vow there and then that I would never again +present myself wherever I might be invited out until a full hour beyond +the specified time--and I've generally kept it, too! + +Min did not treat me cavalierly, however, notwithstanding that I had +arrived in advance of expectation. _She_ was all kindness and grace, +endeavouring to make the "mauvais quart d'heure" of my solitary +guesthood pass away as little uncomfortably to me as possible. + +She asked me to come and see her flowers in the bay window of the +drawing-room, which she had fitted up as a tiny conservatory; while her +mother sat down to the piano and played dreamy music in a desultory +fashion. I like dreamy music, although it always makes me melancholy-- +indeed, all music affects me the same way, in spite of my not being by +any means what you would call a sad person. On the contrary, I am +supposed to be one of the most light-hearted fellows imaginable, and, +certainly, laugh more than I ever cry. However, mirth and sadness are +closer allies than people generally suspect. All emotion proceeds, more +or less, from hysteria. + +While Mrs Clyde was playing, Min and I got talking. She thanked me for +coming early; and upbraided the absent guests for thinking it +fashionable to come later than bidden. + +We discussed the rival merits of a scarlet japonica and a double +fuchsia, giving the palm of merit to the former, though the latter had +some wondrous lobes; and I was also asked my opinion whether her +favourite maidenhair fern would survive a sudden and unaccountable +blight which had fallen upon it a few days before. + +She then showed me the identical violets I had given her that Christmas +morning, now so long passed by: she had tipped the stalks with sealing +wax and preserved them in cotton wool, so that they looked as fresh as +when first gathered. + +"There!" she said, with an air of triumph. "There, Mr Lorton! I have +kept them ever since." + +"Mr Lorton!" I repeated, "who is he? I don't know him." + +"Well, `Frank,' then--will that please you better, you tiresome thing?" + +"You know you promised," I said, apologetically. + +"Did I?" she asked, with charming naivete. + +"Why, have you forgotten that night already?" I said, in a melancholy +tone. + +"Don't be so lugubrious," she said. "You have to amuse me. You mustn't +remember all my promises." + +"Are they so unsubstantial?" I asked. + +"No, they're not, sir!" she said, stamping her foot in affected anger. +"But what do you say to my keeping your violets so long, Frank?" + +"What do I say?" I repeated after her, looking my delight into her +eyes; when, a frantic chord, struck deep down in the bass by Mrs Clyde, +marking the finish of some piece of Wagner's, recalled us both to every- +day life. + +As nobody else had yet arrived, Min challenged me to a game of chess. + +I allowed her to win the first game easily. + +She pouted, saying that she supposed I thought it below my dignity to +put forth my best energies in playing against a lady! + +Thereupon, I _did_ exert myself; but, she was just as provokingly +dissatisfied. + +I took her queen. She protested it was unfair. + +I offered to restore it to her; she would not have it at any price;--she +wished me to play the game, she said, just as if I were playing with a +man. + +I checkmated her. She got up in a pet, saying that chess was a nasty, +stupid, tiresome thing, and that she would not play it any longer. + +O, the contrariness of feminine nature! + +Other people now began to drop in; and it was _my_ turn to get put out. + +I heard it was Min's birthday, which I had not known before. I saw that +they remembered it; while, I, had not brought her even a paltry flower! + +Everybody was wishing her "many happy returns of the day." I had not +done so; neither had I any opportunity of atoning for my neglect, as she +was too busy receiving the new comers; but, indeed, I would have been +too proud to excuse myself after witnessing Mr Mawley's "effusion." + +He seemed to me to be guilty of unpardonable effrontery in holding Min's +hand such an unconscionably long time in his, when presenting a +miserable shop-bouquet; and, as for the lackadaisical airs of that +insufferable donkey, Horner--I can find no words adequate wherewith to +express what I thought; he was positively sickening! + +I did not have another chance of speaking to Min either; that is, unless +I chose to bawl what I had to say across a crowded room; and, I need +hardly say, I did not exactly care about that! + +She appeared to me to be very inconsistent, too. + +She seemed really much more interested in Mawley's conversation than _I_ +thought any reasonable person could be; while _he_ was grinning and +carrying on at a rate, which, if I had been Mrs Clyde, I would not have +allowed for a moment. + +O, the equilibriant temperament of the "superior" sex! + +Min teased me yet further. + +She sang every song that Mawley and Horner asked her for, playing the +accompaniments for the latter when he favoured the company with his idea +of ballad vocalisation. + +Horner thought he possessed a fine tenor voice: I didn't think so, +especially on this evening! + +But, no matter what these two asked her to do, she did. If _I_, +however, requested any particular song, she said she did not believe she +could manage it; her voice could not compass it; she had lent it out; +or, she hadn't got it! + +Was it not enough to provoke one? Wouldn't you have been affected by +it? + +In addition to Horner and Mawley, there was also an odious cousin of +hers, called "Jack," or "Tom," or "Ned," or some other abominably +familiar abbreviation, who hung over the piano stool, and said "Min, do +this," and "Min, do that," in a way that drove me to frenzy. + +I hate cousins! I don't see the necessity for them. I'm sure people +can get along very well without their existence. I would do away with +them to-morrow by act of Parliament, if I only had the power. + +When everybody else who had a voice at all had exercised their vocal +powers, Mrs Clyde at last asked me to sing. + +Instead of declining, as I would have done at any other time, on account +of her slight, I bowed my acquiescence and went to the piano. + +To tell you the truth, I was glad of the opportunity afforded me for +carrying out a petty piece of revenge against Min, of which I had +suddenly bethought me. + +I had composed a little song, you must know, that I believed highly +applicable to her at the moment, although when I had written it she was +no more in my mind than Adam or Eve, or both! + +I sang it, looking into her face the while, as she stood by the +instrument; and these were the words. I gave them expression enough, +you may be sure. + + "My lady's eyes are soft and blue, deep-changing as the + iris hue; + _But, eyes deceive + Hearts `worn on sleeve,' + And make us oft their power rue_! + + "Her little mouth--a `sunny south'--wafts perfumed + kisses to the wind; + _But, winds blow cold, + And kiss of old, + A trait'rous symbol was, I find_! + + "For pearly teeth and rosebud lips, whose honied wealth + the zephyr sips, + _But bait the lair + Where fickle fair, + Like Scylla, wreck men's stately ships_-- + + "And witching eyes and plaintive sighs, and looks of love + and tender words-- + Love's tricking arts - + _Are poison'd darts, + More awesome far than pendant swords_!" + +"Thank you," said Mrs Clyde; "it is very pretty. Your own, I suppose?" + +"Yes," I said. I did not feel disposed to be more communicative. + +"What do you call it?" asked Min, carelessly. + +"`Per Contra,'" I answered. "Don't you think it a suitable title?" + +"Yes, _I understand_" she said. "Thank you, _Mr Lorton_!" + +She spoke, with marked emphasis. + +A little time afterwards, when I was sitting moodily in a corner, with a +book before me which I was supposed to be looking at, but whose bare +title escapes my recollection, Min came to my side; and, she began +overhauling some volumes of music that were piled up in a heap on the +floor. + +"Mr Lorton," she said, hesitatingly. + +That "Mr Lorton" set my teeth on edge. + +I made no reply. + +"Frank!" + +"Yes," I said, testily. + +I felt very angry with her for her attentions to Horner and Mawley, and, +as I thought, neglect of me; so, I wished to let her know it. + +"Frank," she repeated, "didn't you mean that song at me?" + +"Yes, I did," I replied, very grumpily. + +"Foolish fellow!" she said; "what a very bad opinion you must have of +me, although I did not know my eyes were blue before! You said the +other night they were grey," and she smiled bewitchingly. But, I +wouldn't be coaxed into good humour. + +"Ce m'est egal," I answered coldly, "whatever they are." + +"You are very cross!" she said pettishly; "I will go and talk to Mr +Mawley, until you get into a better mood, sir, and are more amiable." + +"I'm sure," said I, loftily, "that I would not be the means of depriving +you of his valuable and entertaining society." + +Min laughed provokingly. "At all events," she said, "he is not cross +with me about nothing; and _some_ people might learn better manners from +him, Mr Lorton!" + +"Pray do not let me detain you from such a charming companion, Miss +Clyde," I said, with distant politeness. + +"Even poor Mr Horner can be agreeable and amusing, and _you_ won't even +try to be. I will go to him," she continued, still striving to get me +to be more sociable; but I was obstinate and ill-tempered. + +An angel would not have pacified me. How could I have been so rude to +her? + +I was a brute. + +"Ah," I exclaimed, "_his_ conversation is truly intellectual!" + +She was quite vexed now. + +"You are very unkind," she said. "You speak ill-naturedly of everybody, +and are cross with me on my birthday! I won't speak to you, Frank, +again this evening; there, see if I do!" and she turned away from me +with a tremble in her voice, and an indignant look in the, now, +flashing, grey eyes. + +She kept her promise. + +Much as I tried, when my ill-temper had subsided, to get speech with +her, I was not allowed a word. Even when leaving the house, I only +received a bow. She would not shake hands, to show that I was forgiven. + +I had stopped to the very last in order to sit out Horner. _He_ would +not budge first, and _I_ would not budge first; so now we started off +together, our homeward routes being identical. + +You may imagine that I felt very amicably disposed towards him. I was +ripe for a quarrel, or at least a separation; and Horner soon gave me an +opening. + +He began to praise Min's looks and voice, and the manner in which she +had sung the songs _he_ had asked her for, including the one _he_ had +given her that evening. + +Really, the cool impudence of Horner was something astounding! What +right had he to criticise her? He spoke just as if she belonged to him, +I assure you! + +This was too much, after what I had already gone through. + +"Which way are you going?" I asked him suddenly. + +"Gaw-ing?" he said, in a surprised tone. "Why, stwaight on, of cawse-- +stwaight on!" + +"Then, I'm going round _here_!" I said, wheeling off abruptly at a +right angle from the road we had been pursuing, and going out of my way +in order to get rid of him. + +Flesh and blood could no longer stand his unmeaning, yet gibing +platitudes. + +"Bai-ey Je-ove!" he exclaimed. "But, stawp, my deah fellah. Lorton, I +asshaw you I only meant to say--ah--that Miss Clyde sang my songs most +divinely--ah--and that she's--ah--a vewy nice gahl--ah!" + +Confound him! + +What business had he to say or think anything of the sort? + +I could faintly hear his voice exclaim "Bai-ey Je-ove!" in the distance, +after some seconds' interval, during which we had become widely +separated. + +I was as thoroughly out of temper as I could possibly be. + +I was angry with everybody in the world, Min not excepted, and with the +world itself; but, at myself, more than all. + + + +CHAPTER EIGHT. + +ONLY ABOUT A LITTLE BIRD. + + Oh! let them ne'er, with artificial note, + To please a tyrant, strain their little bill; + But sing what heaven inspires, and wander + where they will! + +I was ten times angrier with myself when I got home. + +What a fool I had been--what an idiot--to have thrown away my chances as +I had done! I had wished for "the roc's egg" to complete my happiness; +and I had obtained it with a vengeance. + +My roc's egg had been the "open sesame" to Mrs Clyde's castle. I had +sighed for it, striven for it, gained it at last; and, a fine mess I had +made of it, all things considered! + +What must she think me? + +An ill-bred, untutored, unlicked cub, most probably! + +I did not let myself off easily, I promise you. My conscience gave it +to me well, and I could find no satisfactory terms in which I could +express my opinion of my own surly behaviour. + +I think if some people only knew the bitter pangs that social culprits +afterwards experience within themselves for their slips and slidings by +the way, they would be less harsh in their judgments and unsparing in +their condemnation than they usually are. Sending him to Coventry is a +poor punishment in comparison with the offender's own remorse. He finds +the "labor et opus redintegrare gradum" hard enough, without that +Rhadamanthus, "society," making the ascent slippery for him! + +As I recalled the incidents of the evening, I could not help allowing to +my conscience that Mr Mawley the curate, whom I disliked, had shown +himself a gentleman, where I had only acted like a snob; while Horner, a +man whom I, in my conceit, had looked down upon and affected to despise +as an empty-headed fop and nonentity, was a prince beside me! + +They had but played their respective social parts, and accepted the +gifts that the gods provided; while I--dunder-headed dolt that I was-- +had conducted myself worse than a budding school-boy who had but just +donned swallow-tails, and made his first entry into society! + +Jealousy had been the cause of it all, of course; but, although I have +always held, and will continue to believe, that the presence of that +"green-eyed monster," as the passion is euphuistically termed, is +inseparable from all cases of real, thorough, heart-felt, engrossing +love--still, jealousy is no excuse for ill-manners. "Noblesse oblige" +always. There is no half-way medium; no middle course to take. + +Then, fancy my being such a brute as to quarrel with Min, merely because +she could not avoid being courteous to her guests! The fact of their +being personally obnoxious to me, did not affect the scale one way or +the other; she could not help _that_. I doubt whether she even knew it. + +I was unable to forgive myself, and wondered if she would excuse my +conduct, and speak to me again; although, I really deserved social +extinction. + +But, I surely could not belie her angel nature, I thought? When she +came to know all I had suffered that evening, and the miserable self- +upbraidings I had since endured, she would pity me, and forgive me, +forgetting all that had occurred "as a dream when one awaketh?" I was +sure she would; and I gained renewed courage from the impression. + +I now bethought me how I should next present myself before her. In +accordance with the usages of conventionality, it would be right for me +to make an early call at Mrs Clyde's, in recognition of her late +assembly; and, unless I should chance to meet Min out alone, I would +have no chance of making my apology before then, while, even on that +occasion, the presence of her mother might prevent my speaking to her as +openly as I wished. What should I do? + +I determined, under the circumstances, and from the fact of our being +such old friends--she had said so herself, had she not?--that I would +make her a little peace-offering, in the shape of a present of some sort +or other. + +This did not occur to me with the idea of propitiating her as an +offended goddess, sacrifices being out of date in the existing era-- +except those to Moloch! No, such a thought never occurred to me for a +moment. + +Min was not the class of girl whose pardon or good-will could be +purchased, as is frequently the case, perhaps, with others of her sex! + +What suggested the scheme to me was, my not having made her any birthday +gift, as her other friends, without exception, had done. It is "never +too late to mend;" so, why should I not take her a little present now, +to show her that she lived in my heart and had not been intentionally +forgotten? If she accepted my offering, good. I should then be certain +that she extenuated my gaucherie at her party, whether I got speech with +her or no. Yes, that would be the proper course for me to pursue. +Would you not have thought so in a like contingency? + +The present being decided on, what should I get for her? Flowers, +photographs, books, music, and all those delicate nothings, which people +generally tender as souvenirs for other people's acceptance, she had in +abundance. + +None of these would do at all. I wanted her to have some special, out- +of-the-way something from me, which would always call the giver before +her mind whenever she saw it. You may think my wish a selfish one, +perhaps, but we generally like to be remembered by those we love. I +think so, at least; and, I do not believe I am a very exceptional +individual. + +What should my gift be? It would not be proper for me to offer, nor was +it likely that her mother would allow her to accept, anything very +valuable, or of intrinsic worth: such as a watch, which I first thought +of. Besides, she had a watch already--one that kept time, unlike most +ladies' "time-keepers"--and a particularly pretty one it was, too; so, +that was out of the question at once. Jewellery would be just as +inadmissible. What on earth should my present consist of? + +Why, a bird, of course! How stupid I was growing, to be sure! I really +had become quite dull. A bird would be the very thing of all others to +suit her, so I need not worry my brains any longer. She had plenty of +flowers in her bay window conservatory, besides a tiny crystal fountain, +that leaped and sparkled to the astounding altitude of some eighteen +inches, and which, on festive occasions, ran Florida-water or Eau-de- +Cologne. In addition to these, she required, to my mind, a bird to +complete the effect of the whole. A bird she, accordingly, should have. + +I had often heard her say that she loved birds dearly. Not wild +songsters, however, who sing best in their native freedom of the skies, +like the spotted-breasted, circle-carolling lark, the thicket-haunting +blackbird, and the sweet-throated thrush.--It would have afforded her no +pleasure to prison up one of these in a cage. But, a little fledgling +that had never known what it was to roam at its own sweet will, and who, +when offered the liberty of the air, would hardly care to "take +advantage of the situation;" _that_ would be the bird which she would +like to have, I was certain. + +I knew just such an one. I had him, in fact. He was "Dicky Chips:"-- +the funniest, quaintest, most intelligent, and most amusing little +bullfinch you ever clapped eyes on. + +I resolved that Dicky Chips should be Min's property from henceforth. + +Whenever she watched him going through his varied pantomimic role, and +heard his well-turned, whistling notes--he had a rare ear for music--she +would think of _him_ who gave him to her, although he might then be far +away. I decided the point at once before going to bed. Dicky Chips +should, like Caliban, have a new master, or rather mistress; and be a +new man, or rather bird, to adopt Mr Toots' peculiar ellipto- +synthetical style of speaking. Where do you think I got hold of him? +Do you know a travelling naturalist who goes about London during the +summer months--and all over the country, too, for that matter, as I've +met him north of Tweed, and down also at the Land's End, in Cornwall? + +He has birds for sale, and he sells them only at that period. + +Where he hides himself when winter, dark and drear, approaches, I'm sure +I cannot tell; but I've never seen him _then_ perambulating the streets. +He may possibly, at that season, join company with Jamrack--that +curiosity of the animal world; or, he may hibernate in the Seven Dials, +as most feather-fanciers do; or, he may retire to his private mansion in +Belgrave Square; or, again, he may, peradventure, go abroad "to increase +his store," in the fashion of Norval's father, the "frugal swain" who +fattened his flocks on the Grampian Hills--though, I prefer South Down +mutton, myself! + +The bird-seller may do either and all of these things in the winter +months; but, I only know his summer habitude:--then he is always to be +observed going about the streets with birds for sale. + +Do I mean the gentleman who wheels about a costermonger's table-cart, +whereon he makes a number of unfortunate canaries pull about tiny +carriages, with yokes, shaped like those of the Roman chariots, and fire +cannons, and appear as if they liked it; while a decrepit white mouse +runs up a cane flag-staff, supporting himself finally, and very +uncomfortably, on the top? + +No; I do not mean anything of the sort. The person I refer to is quite +a different character. + +He is generally to be seen driving in a large, full-bodied gipsy waggon, +or covered-in break, with open sides and a tarpaulin roof, in which he +has, carefully stowed away, tiers upon tiers of cages, that contain +almost every description of English and foreign birds; not excluding, +also, sundry small pet animals--monkeys, squirrels, and toy dogs, to +wit. + +He invariably accommodates two horribly-ugly, black-faced pugs, +underneath the driving seat of his vehicle; and you may generally hear +his approach, when distant more than a mile, through the chirping, and +squeaking, and squalling, of his motley cargo. + +Canaries are there by the hundred, packed up separately in those square +little wooden boxes, each fitted with a small, red, goblet-shaped +pitcher and seed-rack, in which they are imported from Germany; parrots, +macaws, cockatoos, and lories; larks, thrushes, blackbirds; starlings, +magpies, and such like--down to the common hedge-sparrow and poor little +Jenny wren. + +There, now! I have pointed out the distinguishing characteristics of +the itinerant bird-fancier; and, should you never have seen him before, +you will be able at once to recognise him in case of your possibly +encountering him in the future. + +Well, one day, meeting this gentleman "drumming around" our suburb, I +had the curiosity to stop and inspect his live freight. In doing so I +lighted upon Dicky Chips, as I subsequently christened him: a sturdy +little bullfinch, who looked somewhat out of place, and lonesome, +amongst his screaming companions from foreign lands. I purchased him +for a trifle, and have never since regretted the bargain, for, he was a +dear, bright little fellow; so tractable, too, and intelligent, that I +was able to educate him to a pitch of excellence, which, I believe, no +bullfinch in England ever reached, before or since. + +When invited properly, he would dance a hornpipe, whistling his own +music in sharp staccato notes, as from a piccolo. He could likewise +"present arms" with a little straw musket which I had provided for him; +besides feigning to be dead, and allowing you to take him up by the +legs, his head hanging down, apparently lifeless, the while, without +stirring--although he would sometimes, if you kept him too long in this +position, open one of his beady black eyes, and seem to give you a sly +wink, as if to say, "A joke is a joke, certainly; but you may, perhaps, +carry it too far!" I could not enumerate half his accomplishments in +this line; and, as for whistling operatic tunes--the most difficult +ones, with unlimited roulades, were his especial choice--"Bai-ey Je- +ove!" as Horner would say, you should only have heard him. + +As I allowed him to go in and out of his cage at pleasure, he roamed the +garden according to his own sweet will, whenever and wherever he +pleased, without reservation; and he, I may add, seldom abused the +privilege. Some time after I had given him to Min, he actually found +his way back one morning to our house again. I shall never forget the +circumstance: you should have witnessed his delight at seeing the old +place and his old friends again! He flirted, he danced, he rolled in +paroxysms of joy on the little table by the window, whereon he had been +accustomed to go through his performances:--he chirped, he whistled; in +fact, he behaved just like a mad bird. + +But he did not desert his mistress, mind you. I think he even got +fonder of her than he had even been of me. Still, often after +discovering that he could thus vary the monotony of his existence by +paying a visit to his old domicile--which only lay a short distance from +his new quarters--he would come round; and, after spending an hour or +two with me, when he would conscientiously insist on going through the +entire round of his accomplishments without any invitation on my part, +as if to show that he yet retained his early instructions well in mind, +he would return to Min's house, and the no less warm affection that +awaited him there. + +This was the little present that I intended for a birthday gift to my +darling: one that I valued beyond gold. The very next afternoon I +carried him round to her in my coat-pocket--he having a tiny cage that +just fitted into it comfortably "to a _t_." + +Fortunately, I found Min alone in the drawing-room, when I was ushered +in. She was sitting on the sofa reading, and, although she rose up on +my entrance, she only bowed, looking distant, and somewhat embarrassed. + +This did not look well for my chances of forgiveness, and for getting +her to accept Dicky Chips, did it? + +I went up to her impulsively. + +"Min!" I exclaimed, "can you, will you, excuse and forgive me for +acting so rudely last night? I cannot forgive myself; and I shall be +miserable till you pardon me!" + +She looked down gravely a minute. + +"What made you so naughty, sir?" she asked at length, looking up again +with a dancing light in the clear grey eyes, and a smile on her pretty +little mouth. + +"I thought that you did not want me, Min; and I wished myself away, when +I saw you speaking to every one else that came, as if you did not care +to speak to me. I was very unhappy, and--" + +"Oh, Frank!" she said; "unhappy!" + +"Yes," I said, "I was never more so in my life. I believed you +preferred speaking to Mr Mawley and Horner, to talking to me, and I +thought it very unkind of you." + +"Well, do not think so again, sir," she said, with such a pretty +affectation of sternness, and laughing one of her light, silvery laughs. + +"And you did not wish me away?" I asked, anxiously. + +"Of course not," she answered. "Why should I have done so? You would +not have been invited, sir, if your noble presence had not been wished +for, Master Frank." + +"And you didn't care so much for Mawley after all?" I continued, +rendered bolder by her changed manner. + +"You must not ask too many questions, sir!" she said. "This just shows +how very unreasonable you were! How could I have neglected everybody +else to speak to you, only, all the evening; what would they have +thought, sir? what would mamma have said? Besides, you were not very +entertaining, Master Frank; you were very cross, sir; you know you +were!" + +"But you forgive me now, Min, don't you?" I implored. + +"Yes," she said, "if you promise never to be cross with me again." + +"What, cross with _you_?" I exclaimed. + +"You were, though, last night," she said, with a little toss of her +well-shaped head. + +I thought the time had now arrived for making my little peace-offering; +and yet, I felt as shy and nervous about it as did poor "Young John," +the gaoler's son of the Marshalsea, when he went to call on Little +Dorrit's father in the grand Bond Street hotel, and drew his humble +present of a bundle of cigars from his coat-pocket. + +"Min," I said, "you have heard me speak of a clever little bird I had-- +Dicky Chips?" + +"Oh, yes," she said. "You mean the nice little fellow you taught to do +so many funny things? Nothing has happened to him, I hope, Frank? I +should be so very sorry," she added, sympathisingly, "for I know you are +very fond of him." + +"No," said I hesitatingly; "nothing has happened to him, exactly; that +is, Min, I have brought him over for you; and, unless you accept him, I +shall think you are still angry with me, and have not forgiven me." + +I thereupon pulled the little chap, cage and all, out of my pocket, and +presented him to her. + +"Oh, Frank!" she exclaimed, in her sweet, earnest accents, with a ring +of emotion in them. "He's such a little pet of yours; and you have had +him so long! I would not take him from you for the world!" + +"Then," said I, just as earnestly, "you have not forgiven me. Oh, Min! +when you promised to do so!" And I took up my hat as if to go away. + +We argued the point; but, the end of the matter was, that Dicky Chips +was made over to his new mistress, with all his goods, chattels, and +appurtenances. A happy bird he might consider himself henceforth, I +knew. He would be idolised--a very nice situation, indeed, for a +bullfinch! + +By-and-by I got closer to Min, as we were standing up, talking together +and making Dicky go through a few of his tricks on the drawing-room +table. + +"Min," said I, softly, bending over her and looking down into her +honest, truth-telling grey eyes--"my darling!" + +But, at that precise moment, the door opened; and, in walked Mrs Clyde. + + + +CHAPTER NINE. + +BREAKERS AHEAD! + + Oh, I see thee, old and formal, fitted to thy petty part, + With a little hoard of maxims preaching down a + daughter's heart. + "They were dangerous guides the feelings--she herself + was not exempt-- + Truly she herself had suffer'd"--perish in thy + self-contempt! + +Mrs Clyde's appearance coming so suddenly upon the scene, acted as an +application of the cold douche to all the loving ardour with which I was +addressing Min. It completely spoiled the tableau; checking my eager +impetuosity in a moment, and causing me to remain, tongue-tied, in a +state of almost hopeless embarrassment. + +Picture the unexpected presentment of the statue of "The Commander" +before Don Giovanni, and his horror at hearing words proceed from marble +lips! You will, then, be able to form some faint idea of my feelings, +when my pleasant position was thus interrupted by Min's mother. I was +altogether "nonplussed," to use a vulgar but expressive word. + +Had she not come in so opportunely--or inopportunely, as _you_ may +think--I don't know what I might not have said. + +You see, I was close to my darling, bending down over her and looking +into her beautiful face. I was fathoming the depths of her soul- +lighted, lustrous grey eyes; and, contiguity is sometimes apt in such +circumstances, I am told, to hurry one into the rashness of desperation, +bringing matters to a crisis. However, Mrs Clyde's entrance stopped +all this. I was brought up all at once, "with a round turn," like a +horse in full gallop pulled back on his haunches; or, "all standing," as +a boat with her head to the wind--whichever simile you may best prefer. + +A shower-bath is a very excellent thing in its way, when taken at the +proper time and under certain conditions; but those two requirements +must be carefully considered beforehand, for the human frame is a fabric +of very delicate organisation. Any violent change, or hasty +interference with the regular and legitimate working of its functions, +may throw the whole machine out of gear, just as the sudden quickening +of an engine's motions will, probably, cause it to break down or turn it +off the line; while, on the other hand, a wholesome tonic, or fillip, +judiciously administered when occasion seems to demand it, like our +shower-bath, may often better enable it to discharge its duties and go +all the more smoothly and easily--as a tiny touch of the oil-can will +affect the movements of man's mammoth mechanical contrivances, that are +so typical of himself. + +There are some people, I am aware, who object to the institution in +toto, arguing that it hurts the system with its unexpected shock, doing +more harm than good. There are others who believe in nothing but +shocks, and similar methods of treatment out of the common run; and +these "go in" for shower-baths, "a discretion"--though, without +discretion, would, perhaps, be a truer description. You may not be +informed, also, that the "institution" is frequently used in lunatic +asylums and penal establishments as an instrument of torture and +correction, being known to operate most efficaciously on obstreperous +and hardened criminals, when all other means of coercion have failed. + +As it is with the shower-bath physically considered, so it is in regard +to the moral douche, to bring my apparent digression to a pointed +application. Properly taken, it nerves up the cerebral tissues; +experienced unawares, at right angles to previous paths of thought and +preparation, it reduces the patient to a temporary state of mental coma +and bewilderment--as exemplified in my case on the present unhappy +occasion. + +I never felt so completely "flabbergasted," as sailors say, in my life, +as when Min's mother came into the room that afternoon, just at the +moment when I was meditating a master-stroke against the fortress of my +darling's heart. + +I trembled in my boots. + +I wished the earth to open and swallow me up! + +Mrs Clyde was a thorough woman of the world. Judging her out of her +own circle of limited diameter, you would imagine her to be cool, +unimpassioned, cold-blooded, narrow-minded; but, she could be, at the +same time, bigoted enough in regard to all that concerned herself, her +social surroundings and her belongings--an advocate, as warm as +Demosthenes, as logical as Cicero:--a partisan amongst partisans. Warm +and impulsive, where fervour and a display of seemingly-generous +enthusiasm would effect the object she had in view, that of compassing +her ends, she could also be as frigid as an icicle, when it likewise so +suited her purpose. "Respectability" and "position" were her gods:--the +"world"--_her_ world!--her microcosm. + +Where persons and things agreed with these, being sympathetic to their +rules and regulations, they naturally belonged to "the house beautiful" +of her creed, for they _must_ be good:--where they ran counter to such +standards of merit, which were upheld by laws as unvarying and +unchangeable as those of the Medes and Persians, and administered by a +judge as stern as Draco--they were, they _must_ be evil; and were, +therefore, cast out into the outer darkness that existed beyond her +sacred Lares and Penates. + +Good Heavens! how can pigmy people, atoms in the vast eternity of time, +thus narrow the great universe in which they are permitted to exist; +dwarfing it down, to the limit of their jaundiced vision, by the +application of their miserable measuring tape of "fashionable" feet and +"class" inches! How can they abase grand humanity to the level of their +social organon, affecting to control it with their arbitrary +absolutisms, their mammon deification, their mimic infallibility! What +creeping, crawling, wretched insects we all are, taken collectively; +and, of all of us, the blindest, the most insignificant, and most grub- +like, are, so-called men and women "of the world!" + +Cold, heartless, in a general sense, and worldly as Mrs Clyde was, I +could easily have excused it in her and tried to like her, for, was she +not the mother of my darling, whom with all her faults she loved very +dearly--her affection being judiciously tempered by those considerations +paramount in the clique to which she belonged? But, Mrs Clyde did not +like _me_. She spurned every effort I essayed to make her my friend. + +I saw this the first evening I passed in her house; and the impression I +then received never wore off. + +Just as you can tell at sight whether certain persons attract or repel +you, through some unknown, nameless influence that you are unable to +fathom; so, in like degree, can you decide--that is, if you possess a +naturally sensitive mind--whether they are drawn towards yourself or +remain antipathetical. I know that _I_ can tell without asking them, if +people whom I see for the first time are likely to fancy me or not; and, +at all events, I had some inward monition which warned me that Mrs +Clyde, contrary to my earnest wish that she should regard me in a +friendly light, was not one of those amiable beings who would "cotton to +me," as the inhabitants of New England express the sentiment in their +pointed vernacular. + +Perhaps you think me a very egotistical person, thus to dwell upon my +own ideas and feelings? + +You must recollect, however, that I'm telling you this story myself, a +story in which I am both actively and intimately interested; and how, +unless I speak of my own self, are you going to learn anything about me? +I have nobody to describe me, so I _must_ be what you call +"egotistical." + +Yes, Mrs Clyde did not like me. + +I do not mean to say, remember, that she was impolite, or grim, or +wanting in courtesy. + +The reverse was the case, as she was one of the smoothest, suavest +persons you ever met. + +But, there is an exquisitely refined way in which a woman of the world +can make you understand that your presence is "de trop" and your society +distasteful, without saying a single word that might be construed into +an offence against good breeding. + +Mrs Clyde was a thorough mistress of this art. + +Her searching eye could appraise at a glance a man's mental calibre or a +lady's toilette. It seemed to pierce you through and through, exploring +your inmost thoughts, and enlightening her as to what her course of +procedure should be in regard to you, before she had spoken a word, or +you either. + +So _I_ believed at any rate; for, to tell the honest truth, I was +horribly afraid of Min's mother. I always felt on tenter hooks in her +presence, from the very first date of our acquaintanceship. + +On coming into the room where Min and I were regarding Dicky Chip's +performances with loving eyes, and I completely "translated" by various +combinating influences, Mrs Clyde appeared to take in the situation in +an instant--"an eyewink," as a minute portion of time is happily +rendered in the Teutonic tongue. Certainly, she grasped everything at a +glance--even the contingency that might have possibly occurred, for, my +embarrassment was not lost upon her. I saw an anxious expression hover +across her face for a second, to be quickly replaced by her ordinary +society look of calm, studied suavity. + +"Oh!" she exclaimed, in well-feigned astonishment at my presence--"Mr +Lorton, how d'ye do!" + +"How do you do, Mrs Clyde?" said I, straightening myself up, and then +bending in feeble attempt at a bow. + +She said nothing further for the moment, thinking it best to leave the +burden of the conversation on me, so as to better promote my ease of +manner and general welfare, in a "company" light. She was dexterous in +fence, was Mrs Clyde. + +"Ah!" said I at length after an uncomfortable pause, "that was a +delightful evening we had last night!" It was a polite falsehood; but +then, one must say something when in "society" be it never so senseless +and silly! + +"I am glad you enjoyed yourself," she answered, although she knew well +enough that I had done no such thing. + +"Oh, mamma!" said Min, coming to the rescue, "see what a dear little +bird Mr Lorton has brought me! It is really so clever that it can +almost do anything. Dicky, dicky, cheep!" she chirped to my young +representative, who sat in the centre of the table, perched on a +photographic album and with his head cocked on one side. He was staring +very inquisitively at Mrs Clyde. He evidently regarded her as an +enemy; for, the feathers on his crest got ruffled. + +"Indeed!" said her mother, in freezing accents--down to the temperature +of the best Wenham Lake ice!--"I'm sure Mr Lorton is very good! Still, +you know, Minnie," she continued, "that I do not like you receiving +presents in this way." + +"But it is only a little bird, Mrs Clyde!" I said, at last nerved up +to the speaking-point. I thought she would have told me then and there +to take it back; and I awaited, in fear and trembling, what she would +say next. + +"And he's such a little darling, mamma!" interposed Min impulsively. + +Mrs Clyde could not help smiling. + +"That may be quite true, my dear," she said; "but, as you know, and as +Mr Lorton is probably also aware--although he is very young to have as +yet mixed much in the world"--_cut number two_!--"it is not quite +correct for young ladies to receive presents, however trifling, from +gentlemen who are, comparatively, strangers to them, and to whom they +have been but barely introduced!"--_cut three_! + +"Oh, mamma!" said Min, in an agony of maidenly shame. She coloured up +to the eyes--at the dread of having done something she ought not to have +done. + +Her exclamation armed me to the teeth. I would have stood up in defence +of my darling against a hundred mammas, all cased in society's best +satire-proof steel. I determined to "carry the war into Egypt," and +opened fire accordingly. + +"Pardon me, Mrs Clyde," said I, quite as frigidly as herself--"but the +fault, if error there be on either side, lies on my shoulders. I am +sure I meant no harm. I only brought the little bird as a remembrance +of your daughter's birthday, having forgotten to present it yesterday, +when her other friends made _their_ offerings." + +My speech, however, produced no impression; she quickly parried my weak +thrust, returning me tierce en carte. + +"But they were all _old_ friends, Mr Lorton:--_that_ made it quite a +different thing," she said, very coldly, although with the sweetest +expression. I daresay Jael smiled very pleasantly when she drove that +nail into Sisera's temple! + +I thought I perceived a slight loophole for attack. "I believe," said +I, "that both Mr Horner and Mr Mawley were only introduced to Miss +Clyde a short time previously to myself." + +Bless you, I was a child in her practised hands! Fancy my making such a +blunder as to show her where the shoe pinched me! + +"I think, Mr Lorton," she replied, "that _I_ am the best judge as to +whom I consider my daughter's friends. Mr Mawley is a clergyman of the +parish, and Mr Horner the nephew of a gentleman whom I have known for +years!"--Ah! she _did_ know about Horner's expectations, then; I thought +she did!--"But," she continued, in a slightly less frigid tone, probably +on account of seeing Min's agitation, and from the belief that she had +put me down sufficiently--"But, Mr Lorton, I do not wish to appear +unkind; and, as you never thought of all this, most likely, my daughter +may keep the bird you kindly brought her, if she likes." + +"Oh, thank you, mamma," said Min, caressing Dicky Chips, who thereupon +burst into a paean of melody, in which the opening bars of the "Silver +Trumpets" march and "Green grow the Rushes, O" were mixed up +harmoniously, in splendid confusion. Knowing little bullfinch that he +was! He succeeded, as peradventure he intended, in at once turning the +conversation into a fresh channel, where Min's constraint and my +embarrassment were soon dispelled. + +Mrs Clyde had not been a bit put out during the entire interview. + +She was now, as she had been all along, as cool and collected, as suave +and serene, as possible. In this respect she somewhat resembled Horner, +her promising young friend--nothing could put her out--although _her_ +mental equilibrium resulted from habit and training; while Horner's, in +my opinion, was entirely owing to his natural apathy and inherent +dulness of disposition. + +Shortly after hostilities had terminated between us, and a truce +declared, Mrs Clyde said that she hoped that I would kindly excuse +herself and Min, as they had to prepare to go out to make several calls. + +Thus politely dismissed, I accordingly took my leave. But, not before +the astute lady of the world had contrived to impress me with the +consideration that Mrs Clyde moved in a very different circle to that +of Mr Lorton; and, that, if I had the assurance and audacity to aspire +to the hand of "her daughter," I need not nurse the sweet belief that +_she_ would lend a favourable ear to my suit. I must, in that case, be +prepared to wage a war a outrance, in which there would be no quarter +allowed, on _one_ side at least. + +You must not think that I make these remarks with any bitter feelings +now in my heart towards Min's mother. I only desire to tell my story +truthfully; and, I may say at once that she failed in our after struggle +together. I really believe that she meant honestly to do the best she +could for her daughter, as "the best" was held by the articles of her +social creed; and that she manoeuvred so that her "lines" should "fall +in pleasant places." Yet, those good thoughts, and best wishes, and +wise plans of worldly people, effect incalculable mischief and misery +and unhappiness in life. + +Many a sorely-tried heart has been broken by their influence--many a man +and woman ruined for life and for eternity, through their means! And, +although I mean no harm towards Mrs Clyde now, as I have already +stated, however much I may have been opposed to her once--for the battle +has been fought lang syne, and the game played out to its end--still, I +can never forget that she _was_ my enemy! + + + +CHAPTER TEN. + +"A FOOL'S PARADISE." + + Gather ye rose-buds while ye may, + Old Time is still a-flying; + And the same flower that blooms to-day, + To-morrow may be dying! + +Rost nubila Phoebus; "after clouds, comes sunshine." + +I did not allow the coldness of Min's mother to dwell long in my mind. + +What, if Mrs Clyde did not appear to like me? Could I alter the +obliquity of her mental vision by brooding over it, and worrying myself +into a fit of misanthropy? Would it not be better for me to allow +matters to run their appointed course, in accordance with the inexorable +law of events, and not to anticipate those evils with which the future +might be pregnant? The followers of Mahomet are wise men in their +generation. They take everything that happens to them with the +philosophy of their faith. Kismet! It is their fate, may Allah be +praised! they say. + +I was perfectly satisfied to accommodate myself to circumstances; and +gathered flowers, according to wise old Herrick's advice, to my heart's +content. I did not seek to inquire about the future:--why should I? + +Time flew by on golden pinions, and I was as happy as the day was long. +Winter made way for spring, spring gave place to summer. The halcyon +hours sped brighter and brighter for me, from the time of violets--when +nature's sweetest nurslings modestly blossomed beneath the hedge-rows. + +Then came "the month of roses," as the Persians appropriately style that +duodecimal portion of the year. It was a happier time still; for, I +loved Min, and I thought that Min loved me. + +The very seasons seemed to draw me nearer to her. + +In the spring the violets' scented breath recalled her whenever I +inhaled their fragrance; while, the nightingale's amorous trills--we had +nightingales to visit us in our suburb, closely situated as it was to +London--appeared to me to embody the impassioned words that Tennyson +puts in the mouth of his love-wooing sea maiden-- + + "We will kiss sweet kisses, and speak sweet words; + O listen, listen, your eyes shall glisten, + With pleasure and love and jubilee!" + +And, in the early summer, when smiling June came in with her flowery +train, making a garden of the whole earth, the twining roses, of crimson +and white and red, were all emblematic of my darling. They were love- +gages of her own sweet self; for, was she not my rose, my violet, that +budded and blossomed in purple and pink alone for me--the idol of my +heart, my fancy's queen? + +With all these fond imaginings, however, I did not see much of her. + +I had very few opportunities for unfettered intercourse. I believe I +could number on the fingers of one hand all the special little tete-a- +tete conversations that Min and I ever had together. This was not owing +to any fault of mine, you may be sure; but was, entirely, the result of +"circumstances," over which neither of us had "any control." + +"Society" was the cause of it all. Had her mother been never so +willing, and the fates never so kindly lent their most propitious aid to +my suit, it is quite probable that we might not have had the chance of +associating much more together than we did; nor would our interviews +have happened oftener, I think. + +You see people of the upper and middle-classes have far less facility +afforded them, than is common in lower social grades, for intimate +acquaintance; and really know very little, in the long run, of those of +whom they may become enamoured and subsequently marry, prior to the +tying of the nuptial noose. + +Laura and Augustus, may, it is true, meet each other out frequently, in +the houses of their mutual friends at parties, and at various gatherings +of one sort and another; but what means have they of learning anything +trustworthy respecting the inner self of their respective enchanter or +enchantress? + +Do you think they can manage thus to summarise their several points and +merits, during the pauses of the Trois Temps, or while nailing "a rover" +at croquet, or, mayhap, when promenading at the Botanical? + +I doubt it much. + +Professor Owen, it is said, will, if you submit to his notice a couple +of inches of the bone of any bird, beast, fish, or reptile, at once +describe to you the characteristics of the animal to which it belonged; +its habits, and everything connected with it; besides telling you when +and where it lived and died, and whether it existed at the pre-Adamite +period or not--and that, too, without your giving him the least previous +information touching the osseous substance about which you asked his +opinion. + +But, granting that the most gigantic theory might be built up on some +slighter practical evidence, I would defy anyone--even that +philosophising German who evolved a camel from the depths of his inner +moral consciousness--to determine the capabilities of any young lady for +the future onerous duties of wife and mother, and mistress of a +household, merely from hearing her say what coloured ice she would have +after the heated dance; or, from her statements that the evening was +"flat" or "nice," the season "dull" or "busy," and the heroine of the +last new novel "delightful," while the villain was correspondingly +"odious." + +He couldn't do it. + +The commonplace conversation of every-day society is no criterion for +character. + +With Jemima, the maid-of-all-work, and Bob, the baker's assistant, her +"young man," it is quite a different thing. They have no trammels +placed in the way of their free association; and, I would venture to +assert, know more of one another in one month of company-keeping than +Augustus and Laura will achieve in the course of any number of seasons +of fashionable intercourse. A "Sunday out" beats a croquet party +hollow, in its opportunities for intimacy--as may readily be believed. + +It is, really, curious this ignorance common in middle-class husbands +and wives, sons-in-law and daughters-in-law, respecting their several +attributes and characteristics before they became connected by marriage, +and time makes them better acquainted--very curious, indeed! + +An American essayist, writing on this point, says--"When your mother +came and told her mother that she was _engaged_, and your grandmother +told your grandfather, how much did they know of the intimate nature of +the young gentleman to whom she had pledged her existence? I will not +be so hard as to ask how much your respected mamma knew at that time of +the intimate nature of your respected papa, though, if we should compare +a young girl's _man-as-she-thinks-him_ with a forty-summered matron's +_man-as-she-finds-him_, I have my doubts as to whether the second would +be a fac-simile of the first." And yet, young men and women of +respectable standing "over the way," are allowed far greater latitude +for intercommunication than our own; so much so, that I must say, I +would not like our budding misses to go the lengths of the American +girl, who receives her own company when she pleases, without any +previous permission, and can go abroad to places of public amusement, +or, indeed, anywhere she likes, without a chaperon. + +Still, there is a medium in all things; and, without verging to the +extreme of our Transatlantic cousins, our conventionalities might be so +tempered by the introduction of a little genuine human nature, as to +admit of a trifling freer intercourse between our youth and young +maidenhood of the upper classes. + +Goethe, you may remember, makes Werther, whose "sorrows" fascinated a +generation in the days of our great grandmothers, fall in love with +Charlotte, entirely through seeing her cutting bread and butter--nothing +more or less! + +A very unromantic situation for fostering the growth of the tender +passion, you say? + +Ah! but the literary lion of Weimar meant a good deal more in his +description than lies on the outer surface. He wished to teach a +frivolous school that true affection will ripen better under the genial +influences of domestic duties and home surroundings, than the masked +world believes. + +A girl's chances of marriage, the usual end and aim of feminine +existence, are not increased in a direct ratio with the number of her +ball dresses! + +Let your eligible suitors but see those young ladies who may wish to +change their maiden state of single blessedness, _at home_, where they +are engaged living their simple lives out in the ordinary avocations of +the family circle; and not only abroad, in the whirligig of society, +where they have no opportunities for displaying their _real_ natures. + +Enterprising mammas might then find that their daughters would get more +readily "off their hands," at a less expense than they now incur by +pursuing Coelebs through all the turnings and windings of Vanity Fair. + +Besides, they would have the additional assurance, that they would be +better mated to those who prefer studying them under the domestic +regime, than if they were hawked about to parties and concerts without +end, to be angled for by the butterflies of fashion, who can only exist +in the atmosphere of a ballroom and would die of nil admirari-ism if out +of sight of Coote's baton! + +Your man really worth marrying, in the true sense of the word and not +speaking of the value of his rent-roll, likes to know something more of +his future wife-that-is-to-be, beyond what he is able to pick up from +meeting her in society. Think, how many of her most engaging charms he +must remain ignorant of; and then, what on earth can he know of her +disposition? + +The most hot-tempered young lady in the world will manage to control her +anger, and tutor herself to smile sweetly, when her awkward, albeit +rich, partner tears off her train during his elephantine gambols in the +gallop. She may even say, with the most unaffected affectation of +perfect candour that "really it doesn't matter at all," laughing at the +mishap; but I should just like you to hear what she exclaims when her +obnoxious little brother, Master Tommy, playfully dabbles his raspberry- +jam'd fingers over her violet silk dress, or converts her new Dolly +Varden hat into a temporary entomological museum! + +Observation in the family would enable Coelebs to mark these little +episodes more closely, judging for himself the temper and tact of the +idol of his fancy; while, at the same time, he might discover many +admirable little traits of kindness and charity and grace, which can +only be seen to advantage when displayed naturally in the home circle. + +The moral is obvious. + +Depend upon it, if there were a little more of this freedom of +intercourse between our girls and young men, we would have a +considerably less number of sour, disappointed virgins in our annual +census; and, less vice and dissipation on the part of hot-brained +youths, who, frequently, only give way to "fast life," through feeling a +void in their daily routine of existence that stereotyped fashion is +unable to fill. Besides, it would be a perfect godsend to thousands of +unhappy bachelors, who sigh for the realities of domesticity amidst the +artificiality and rottenness of London society. + +Some good-natured Mayfair dame, I believe, introduced the "Kettledrum" +for the especial saving of poor young men who did not know what to do +with their afternoons in our arid Belgravian desert. But, a little more +is wanted besides five-o'clock tea; and, until it is granted, we will +continue to have matrimonial infelicity, marriages "of convenience," +and, no marriages at all! + +Now, I think, I have dilated enough upon the great question matrimonial. +I will not apologise for my digression, because I've only said what I +have long wished and intended to say about it on the first convenient +opportunity. However, as I have at last succeeded in making a clean +breast of the matter, I will revert to my original case. + +Owing to the fact of our suburb being unfashionable, and our society +humdrum, as already explained, I had the pleasure of associating more +fully with Min, and seeing more of her domestic character than I might +have done if we had been both of "the world," worldly; although, as I +have also mentioned, I was not able to adore her at home very often, in +consequence of my noticing that her mother did not like me--seeing +which, of course I did not push my welcome at her house to too fine a +point. + +Don't think that Mrs Clyde was inhospitable. Nothing of the sort. She +gave me a general invitation, on the contrary, to come in whenever I +pleased of an evening "to have a little music;" giving expression at the +same time to the sentiment, that she would be "very happy" to see me. +But, after that affair connected with Dicky Chips, I learnt caution. I +thought it better for me to make my approaches warily. Even to have the +gratification of gazing on one's heart's darling, it is not comfortable, +for a sensitive person, to accept too often the courtesies of a hostess, +by whom you are inwardly conscious that you are not welcomed. + +Still, I did see her at home sometimes. + +I used to go there, at first only occasionally; and then, when I found +Mrs Clyde did not quite eat me up, in spite of her cold manner, I went +regularly once a fortnight--always making my visit on the same day and +at the same hour of the evening; so, that Min learnt to expect me when +the evening came round, and told me that she would have recognised my +modest knock at the door, out of a hundred others. + +Sometimes she and her mother and myself were all alone; but, more +frequently, other casual visitors would drop in, too, like me. + +I liked the former evenings the best, however, as I had her all to +myself, comparatively speaking. + +I could then watch her varying moods more attentively--the tender +solicitude and earnest affection she evinced for her mother:--the +piquant coquetry with which she treated me. + +She had such dear little, characteristic ways about her--ways that were +quite peculiar to herself. + +I got to know them all. + +When she was specially interested in anything that one was saying, she +would lean forwards, with a deep, reflective look in her clear grey +eyes, in rapt attention, resting her little dimpled chin on her bent +hand:--when she disagreed with something you said, she would make such a +pretty quaint moue, tossing her head defiantly, and raise her curving +eyebrows in astonishment that you should dare to differ from her. + +She seldom laughed--I hate to hear girls continually giggling and +guffawing at the merest nothings so long as they proceed from male lips! + +When Min laughed, her laughter was just like the rippling of silvery +music and of the most catching, contagious nature. She generally only +smiled, at even the most humorous incidents; and her smile was the +sweetest I ever saw in anyone. It lit up her whole face with merriment, +giving the grey eyes the most bewitching expression, and bringing into +prominent notice a tiny, dear little dimple in her chin, which you might +not have previously observed. + +Her smile it was that completed my captivation, that first time that I +saw her in church and lost my heart in a moment:--her smile was ever and +always her greatest charm. + +Of course I remember all her little darling ways and coquetries. + +Love is a great master of the art of mnemonics, and might be quoted by +Mr Stokes as one of the greatest "aids to memory" that is known. + +Trifling trivialities, by others passed by unobserved, are graphically +jotted down with indelible ink in his cordal note-book-- + + "For indeed I know + Of no more subtle master under heaven, + Than is the maiden passion for a maid." + +When no other people came in, Min would always, on the evening of my +visit, make a rule of turning out her workbox, and arranging its +contents over again--"in order," as she told me, although I had thought +it the picture of neatness and tidiness in its original state. + +She was in the habit on these occasions of restoring to her mother +sundry little articles which she confessed to having purloined during +the week. I recollect how there used to be a regular little joke at her +expense on the subject of kleptomania. + +How well I remember that little workbox, and its arrangements! I could +tell you, now, every item of its varied contents,--the perfumed sachet, +the ugly little pincushion which she had had since dollhood, the little +scraps from her favourite poets, which she had copied out and kept in +this sacred repository, never revealing them save to sympathising eyes. +How angry she was with me once, for not thinking, with her, that +Longfellow's "Psalm of Life" was the "nicest" thing ever written:--what +a long time it was afterwards before she would again allow me to inspect +her secret treasures and pet things, as she had previously permitted me +to do! + +This all used to go on while her mother was playing; and then, when the +workbox was arranged in apple-pie order, Min herself would go to the +piano and sing my favourite ballads, I listening to her from the +opposite corner of the room, for she hated having her music turned over +by any one. + +In addition to these rare opportunities of studying my darling and +feeding my love for her, I used to see her at church every Sunday. + +From her window, also, when dog Catch and I took our walks abroad, I +often had a bright smile from "somebody," who happened always to be +tending her cherished plants just at the moment when I passed by. + +Sometimes, too, I met her at Miss Pimpernell's, or out walking:--thus, +in a short time, I learnt to know all her little plans and wishes, and +her sentiments about everything. + +Her likes and dislikes were my own. It was a strange coincidence, that +if Min should express some opinion one day, I found, when we next met, +that I seemed to have involuntarily come round to her view; while, if I +let fall any casual remark, Min was certain, on some future occasion, to +repeat it as if it were her own. + +I suppose the coincidence was owing to our mental "rapport," as the +French express it. + +The only drawback to my happiness, was Mr Mawley, whom I disliked now +more than ever. + +Although he had all the rest of the week in which to pay his devoirs, +having carte blanche from Mrs Clyde to run in and out of her house +whenever he so pleased--he took it into his head to drop in regularly on +the very evening that I had selected and thought especially mine. I +believe he only did it to spite me, being of a most aggravating +temperament! + +When he was there, too, he was constantly endeavouring to make me appear +ridiculous. + +As certainly as I said anything, or advanced an opinion, he, as +certainly, contradicted me, taking the opposite side of the question. +This, of course, made me angry and unamiable. He was so obstinately +obtuse, too, that he would not take a hint. He must have seen that his +company was not wanted, by me at least, and that I did not desire any +conversation with him. I've no doubt of his doing it on purpose! + +He prided himself on his eminently practical mind, being incapable of +seeing romance even in the works of nature and nature's God; and he was +continually cutting jokes at my "sentimentality," as he was pleased to +style my more poetical views of life and its surroundings. + +Whenever I gave him the chance, he was safe to slide in some of his +vulgar bathos after any heroic sentiment or personal opinion I may have +uttered. This, naturally, would rouse my temper, never very pacific; +and made me so cross, that I was often on the verge of quarrelling with +Min on his account! + +The worst of it was, also, that he was always so confoundedly cool and +collected, that he generally came out of these encounters in the +character of an injured martyr or inoffensive person, who had to bear +the unprovoked assaults of my bearish brusquerie--making me, as a matter +of course, appear in a very unfavourable light. + +I remember, one day in particular, when he was so exceedingly irritating +to me, that he goaded me on into addressing him quite rudely. + +Min was very much distressed at my behaviour, remonstrating with me for +it; and this did not of course make me feel more kindly-disposed towards +the curate, who had now become my perfect antipathy. + +We had been down to the church--Miss Pimpernell, the Dasher girls, Min, +and myself,--to hear the organist make trial of a new stop which had +been lately added to his instrument. Listening to the small sacred +concert that thereupon ensued, we had remained until quite late in the +evening; and, on our way home through the churchyard, as we loitered +along, looking at the graves, and trying to decipher by the slowly +waning light the half illegible inscriptions on the headstones, we came +across Mr Mawley. + +Min and I were walking in front, talking seriously and reflectively, as +befitted the time and place. + +We were moralising how-- + + "Side by side + The poor man and the son of pride + Lie calm and still." + +"I wonder," said Min, "whether it is true that the dust of the departed +dead blossoms out again in flowers and trees, replenishing the earth? +Just fancy, how many illustrious persons even have died since the +beginning of the world! Why, in England alone we could number our +heroes by thousands; and it is nice to think that they may still +flourish perhaps in these old oak trees above us!" + +"Ah," said I, "don't you recollect those lines about England;-- + + "`Beneath each swinging forest bough, + Some arm as stout in death reposes-- + From wave-washed foot to heaven-kissed brow, + Her valour's life-blood runs in roses; + Nay, let our brothers of the West + Write, smiling, in their florid pages, + One half her soil has walked the rest, + In poets, heroes, martyrs, sages!'" + +"What!" exclaimed Mr Mawley, who had come up close behind us before we +perceived him, and at once pushed into the conversation. "`One half our +soil has walked the rest,' Lorton? That's a palpable absurdity! We'll +take England to be three hundred miles long and two hundred broad, on an +average; and, allowing a uniform depth of twelve feet throughout for +cultivable soil, that calculation will give us some--let me see, three +hundred by two hundred, multiplied by seventeen hundred and sixty to +bring it into yards, and then by three to reduce it to feet, when we +multiply it again by twelve to get the solidity--that gives us nearly +four billions cubic feet of soil, one-half of which would be two +billions. Fancy, Lorton, two thousand millions cubic feet of heroes, +eh! But, you havn't told us what amount of dust and ashes you would +apportion to each separate hero--" he thus proceeded, with his caustic +wit, seeing that Bessie Dasher and her sister were both laughing; and +even Min was smiling, at his absurdities. "Strange, perhaps Oliver +Cromwell is now a mangel wurzel, and poor King Charles the First an +apple tree! Depend upon it, Lorton, that is the origin of what is +called the King Pippin!" + +He made me "as mad as a hatter," with his "chaff" at my favourite +quotation. + +I was almost boiling over with rage. + +I restrained myself, however, at the moment, and answered him in, for +me, comparatively mild terms. + +"Mr Mawley," said I, "you have no more imagination than a turnip-top! +You must possess the taste of a Goth or Vandal, to turn such noble lines +into your low ridicule!" + +He did not mind my retort a bit, however. He seemed to think it beneath +his notice; for, he only said "Thank you, Lorton!" and dropped back +behind us again with Bessie Dasher, while Seraphine joined company with +little Miss Pimpernell--Min and I being still together in front. + +By-and-by our talk was resumed in the same strain from which the +curate's interpellation had diverted it. I had just spoken of Gay the +fabulist. I told her of his sad history:--how it was shown in the +bitter epitaph which he had composed for his own tomb-- + + "Life's a jest, and all things show it; + I _thought_ so once, and now I _know_ it!" + +From this we drifted on to Gray's Elegy, through the near similarity of +the two poets' names. + +"I think," said Min, "that that unadded verse of his which is always +left out of the published poem, is nicer than any of the regular ones; +for it touches on two of my favourites, the violet and the dear little +robin redbreast!" + +"You mean, I suppose," said I, "the one commencing-- + + "`There, scatter'd oft, the earliest of the year--'" + +"Yes," said Min, continuing it in her low, sweet voice-- + + "`By hands unseen, are showers of violets found; + The redbreast loves to build and warble there, + And little footsteps lightly print the ground.'" + +"You like violets, then?" I asked. "I think you told me you did, +though, before." + +"Yes," she said impulsively, "I love them, I love them, I love them!" + +"Ah!" thought I to myself, determining that she should never from +henceforth be without an ample supply of violets, if I could help it, +"Ah, I wish you would love _me_!" But, I did not give utterance to the +thought, contenting myself with keeping up the conversation respecting +the Elegy. "It is generally considered," said I aloud, "that the best +verse of Gray's is that in which he says-- + + "`Some village Hampden, that with dauntless breast, + The little tyrant of his fields withstood, + Some mute inglorious Milton here may rest, + Some Cromwell guiltless of his country's blood!'" + +"Hullo, Lorton!" shouted out Mr Mawley again close at my back, when I +had believed him to be some distance off. "Hullo, Lorton! Don't you +get into heroics, my boy. Does not the `noble bard' make the Prince of +Denmark say, that the dust of Alexander the Great might have served to +fill the bung of a cask and that-- + + "`Imperial Caesar, dead and turn'd to clay, + Might stop a hole to keep the wind away!'" + +This was too much of a good thing. + +I made up my mind to stand his nonsense no longer. + +"I wish you would mind your own business," said I, as rudely as +possible, "and keep your ridiculous conversation to yourself; I want +none of it; I hate to hear fools prating about things they cannot +understand." + +He got quite red in the face; but he kept his temper admirably. + +"When you are cool again, Lorton," he said to me, with an expression of +amiability and mingled pity on his face, that made him look to me like +Mephistopheles, "you will, I know, be sorry for what you've said; and +when you learn good manners I will be glad to speak to you again!" and, +he walked back to the church, with the air of a person who had been +deeply injured, but who had yet the magnanimity to forgive if he could +not forget--wishing adieu to our little party, of whom none but Min had +overheard what I had said, with his usual cordiality, as if nothing had +happened to disturb him. + +"Oh, Frank!" exclaimed Min, when he had got out of sight and we were +once more alone, "how could you be so rude and un-courteous--to a +clergyman, too! I'm ashamed of you! I am hurt at any friend of mine +acting like that!" + +"But he was so provoking," I stammered, trying to excuse myself. The +tone of Min's voice pained me. It was full of grief and reproach: I +knew its every intonation. "He's always worrying me and rubbing against +me the wrong way!" + +"That does not matter, Frank," she replied in the same grave accents, as +coldly as if she was speaking to a stranger--"a gentleman should be a +gentleman always. I tell you what,"--she continued, turning away as she +spoke--"I will never speak to you again, Frank, until you apologise to +Mr Mawley for the language you have used!" + +She then left my side, taking Miss Pimpernell's arm and saying something +about having a long chat with her. + +The end of it was that she had her way. + +I had to go back to search for the curate and ask his pardon, like a dog +with its tail between its legs. + +I was certain he would exult over it, and he did. + +He had not the generosity to meet me half-way and accept my apology +frankly at once. + +He made me humble myself to the full, seizing the opportunity to read me +a long homily on Christian forbearance, in which, I fervently believed +at the time, he was almost as deficient as myself. + +However, I had the consolation of knowing that my apology was not made +on his account, but entirely for the sake of my darling Min; although, I +confess, I did not like to see her taking such an interest in him as to +ask it of me. + + + +CHAPTER ELEVEN. + +JEALOUSY. + + Whispering tongues can poison truth; + And constancy lives in realms above; + And life is thorny, and youth is vain; + And to be wroth with one we love, + Doth work like madness in the brain! + +Some weeks after our conversation in the churchyard, I met old Shuffler +one day waddling along the Terrace in a state of great excitement. + +He told me he was going to an auction, and pressed me to accompany him, +that he might have the benefit of my advice and opinion concerning +certain objects of "bigotry and virtue," as he styled them, which he +designed purchasing--should he be able to get them knocked down cheap. + +On asking the reason for such an unwonted outlay on his part, he said +that he was about furnishing a new villa for which he had just found a +tenant. + +"A fresh tenant!" said I with surprise, a newcomer in our suburb being +always regarded as a sort of rare bird. "A fresh tenant! Who is he, or +she, or whoever it may be?" + +"Well, sir," said Shuffler, "it's a secret as yet; but I don't mind +telling you, Mr Lorton, as I know you won't let it out--Mr Mawley, the +parsun, has took the villa!" + +"Mr Mawley!" I exclaimed, with redoubled astonishment. "Why, what on +earth does _he_ want a house for?" + +"I believe, sir," said Shuffler, blinking his sound eye furiously the +while, to give a facetious effect to his words, "he's agoin' to get +married. So my missus says at least, sir; and she gen'rally knows wot's +agoin' on. Wemmenfolk finds out them things somehow or other!" + +"Mawley going to be married!" I repeated. "Nonsense, Shuffler! it is +probably some mistake. You and your wife must have let your brains run +wool-gathering, and made the story up between you!" + +"No, sir," he replied, "it's as true as you are a standin' there. We've +no call to tell a lie about the matter, sir," and he drew himself up +with native dignity. + +"And you have really heard it for a fact, Shuffler?" + +"I 'ave so, sir; and I could tell you, too, the party as he is agoin' to +join!" + +"Can you?" I asked. "Who _is_ the favoured she?" + +"Well, sir," said he with a sly wink, screwing up his mouth tightly as +if wild horses would not tear the information from him against his will, +"that would be tellin'?" + +"I know it would," said I, "but as you have already told me so much, I +think you might now let me know the lady's name." + +"Mr Lorton," he answered, "you know I would do anything for you I +honestly could, for you 'ave been a friend to me many a time, specially +when I got into that row with the tax collector, when you be'aved +'andsome. But to speak to the rights of the matter, I can't say I +_know_ the lady's name wot the parsun is agoin' to marry: I only has my +suspicions like." + +"Well, and whom do you think to be the one?" said I. + +"She don't live far from here!" he said in a stage whisper, dropping his +voice, and looking round cautiously, as he pointed along the row of +houses composing "the Terrace," where our most fashionable parishioners +resided--our Belgravia, so to speak. + +"You don't mean one of the Miss Dashers?" I said, thinking of Bessie. + +"Lord, no!" he replied, "it ain't one of `my lady's' young ladies!" + +"Then who is it?" I said, getting quite impatient at his +tergiversation. + +"Oh! she comed here later than them!" he answered, still beating about +the bush; "she comed here later than them," he repeated, nodding his +head knowingly. + +A sudden fear shot through me. "Is it?--no, it cannot be--is it Miss +Clyde?" I asked. + +"Ah!" he grunted, oracularly. "You knows best about that, sir!" + +"Well, don't you dare, Shuffler," I savagely retorted, "to couple that +lady's name with Mr Mawley's!" I was literally boiling over with fury +at the very suspicion:--it was the realisation of my worst fears! + +"You've no cause to get angry, Mr Lorton," said he. "I didn't name no +names, sir; tho' you might be further out, as far as that goes! I +didn't know as you was interested in the lady, or I shouldn't 'a +mentioned it." + +"You're quite wrong--quite wrong altogether, Shuffler. Why, the thing's +absurd!" I said. + +"Well, you know you axed me, sir; and what could I say?" he said +apologetically. + +"That may be," I said, less hotly. "But you had better not couple +people's names together in that way. Why, it's actionable!" I added, +knowing the house-agent's mortal dread of anything connected with the +law. + +"But you won't spread it no further, Mr Lorton?" he said, anxiously, +the sound eye looking at me with a beseeching expression. + +"_I_ won't, Shuffler," I answered; "take care that _you_ don't!" + +"I'll take my davy, sir, as how it shan't cross my lips again," he +replied in a convincing tone. + +"Very well, Shuffler," I replied, turning away from him. "Only keep to +that, and it will be best for you. Good day!" + +"Good day, sir; and you won't come to the auction along o' me?" + +"No," said I. "I can't spare the time to-day. I'll try and come to- +morrow, if that will do as well." + +I did not wish to be angry with him; for, after all, I had brought the +bitter information he conveyed entirely upon myself. He was only +repeating what was, probably, already the gossip of the whole suburb. +Besides, he really had mentioned no names:--the allusion to Min, had +been as much my suggestion as his; so, I tried to be affable with him +before we parted. "I'll try and come to-morrow, Shuffler, if that will +do as well, to look at the things you want me," I said, more cordially +than I had previously spoken to him. + +"All right, sir," he replied, all beaming once more, with _the_ eye as +jovial as ever. "That'll suit me jest as well, sir; and I'm very much +obleeged, too, I'm sure." + +He, thereupon and then, waddled off on his mission of beating down +opposition brokers; while I paced along sadly, thinking about the news I +had just heard. + +I was going to call on Lady Dasher, who would be able to confirm it, or +settle that it was a mere idle report; consequently, I would not have to +remain long in suspense. + +I would soon know the truth, one way or the other. + +Prior, however, to my reaching this haven of rumour, I met little Miss +Pimpernell. She was trotting along, with a basket on her arm, according +to her usual wont when district visiting. + +"Hi! Frank," she exclaimed, on seeing me. "What is the matter with you +now? Why, my dear boy, you've got a face as long as my arm, and look +the picture of misery!" + +"Oh, I've just heard something that surprised me," I said. "I've been +told that Mr Mawley is going to get married." + +"Well, that's news to me," she said. "I haven't heard it before. But +what if he _is_ going to be married--are you so sorry on his account, or +for the lady?" she continued, in a bantering tone--she always liked a +bit of a joke--"I never thought you took such an interest in Mr +Mawley!" + +"I'm sure I don't know," I said. "It has surprised me, that's all." + +"_So_ it has me, Frank," said she. "Who told you?" + +"I don't know whether I ought to tell, Miss Pimpernell," I replied, +hesitatingly. "It was disclosed to me in confidence, and--" + +"No matter, no matter, my clear boy," said the old lady briskly. "Then +you ought _not_ to tell me. But, at the same time, Frank, I don't +believe a word of it! If Mr Mawley had been meditating anything of the +sort, _I_ would have been his first confidante! I don't think there's a +word of truth in it, Frank, no matter who your informant was. I daresay +the rumour has got about just because he has taken a house, which he can +very well afford, having got tired of living in lodgings; and small +blame to him, say I! He's no more going to get married than _I_ am, +Frank; and I do not believe that likely, do you?" + +She laughed cheerily, tapping me on the cheek with her glove. + +She was always petting and caressing me; and, I believe, considered me a +sort of big baby exclusively her own property. + +"But his taking a house looks suspicious," I said, willing to be more +convinced. + +"Not a bit of it," said Miss Pimpernell, sturdily. "Why, if Monsieur +Parole d'Honneur took a house, would that be any reason for _his_ +getting married? Ah, I know, Frank, who has put all this nonsense in +your head! It is that gossiping old Shuffler. I'll give him a lecture +when I next catch him," and she shook her fist comically in the air, to +the intense wonderment of Miss Spight, who was crossing the road. + +"But, mind, I didn't tell you so, Miss Pimpernell. Don't tell him that +I repeated what he said?" + +"Stuff and nonsense," she said. "Why, he'll tell everybody he meets the +news in confidence, just the same as he did you. I'll give him a good +wigging, I tell you! Mr Mawley is not going to be married in a hurry; +and if he is, not to the young person you think, Master Frank." + +"I did not mention anybody, Miss Pimpernell," I said, in confusion; for, +her keen black eyes seemed to penetrate into my very heart, and search +out my secret fears. + +She looked very sagacious. + +"Ah! Frank, you did not _say_ anything; but your looks betrayed you. +So _that's_ the reason why the report of the curate's marriage affected +you so, is it? But you needn't blush, my dear boy! You need not blush! +_I_ will not tell tales out of school; so you may set your mind at +rest. It is not, however, as you think, Frank. Cheer up; and good-bye, +my dear boy. I must be trotting off now, or my poor blind woman will +think I'm never coming to read to her." + +And off she went, leaving me much happier than old Shuffler had done. + +Confound him! What did he mean, with his cock-and-a-bull story? + +On reaching Lady Dasher's house, however, the house-agent's rumour was, +to my great distress, confirmed; and, that in the most authoritative +manner. + +It must be true then, in spite of Miss Pimpernell's denial! + +My lady was in one of her most morbid and melancholy moods, too, which +did not help to mend matters. + +I praised her fuchsias on entering; but even this homage to her +favourite hobby failed to rouse her. + +She had heard that Mrs Clyde had some of the most beautiful pelargonia; +and what were _her_ paltry flowers in comparison? + +Alas! she was poor, and could only afford a few miserable fuchsias to +decorate her drawing-room--or rather the better to exhibit its poverty! + +If her poor, dear papa had been alive, things of course would have been +very different; and she could have had petunias, or orchids, or any of +the rarest hot-house flowers she pleased; but, now, she was poor, +although proud, and could not afford them like that rich parvenue. + +How, good things always seemed given to those who are above their need! + +There was Mrs Clyde getting her only daughter engaged to be married +also, she heard; while no suitor came forward for _her_ two poor orphan +girls! + +Such was the staple of her conversation--enlivening, at any rate. + +"Oh, ma!" exclaimed Bessie Dasher at this juncture; "you should not say +so to Mr Lorton! He'll think you wish him to propose at once!" and +both she and her sister burst out laughing at the idea. + +"So I would," said I, jokingly, notwithstanding that I felt as +melancholy and little inclined for raillery as their mother, whose words +seemed to clinch what old Shuffler had said. "So I would, too, if there +weren't a pair of you, and bigamy contrary to law. `How happy could I +be with either, were t'other dear charmer away.' But," I continued, +turning to Lady Dasher, with an assumption of easy indifference which I +found it hard to counterfeit under the searching glances of the two wild +Irish girls, her daughters, "is it really true what you said just now +about Mrs Clyde's daughter, Lady Dasher?" + +"Yes, Mr Lorton," she replied, "to the best of my belief it is; for, I +have heard, on the most unimpeachable authority, that she is engaged to +Mr Mawley. He is always going there, you know." + +"But that is no proof, ma," said Bessie Dasher, who, as I have hinted +before, was suspected of a slight tenderness towards the curate. "Mr +Mawley is always coming here, too!" + +"True, my dear," said her mother; "still there are comings and comings. +You may depend he only goes there so often _for a purpose_! Indeed, I +asked Mrs Clyde whether there was not something in it only yesterday, +and she smiled and said nothing; and, if _that_ isn't proof," she +concluded, triumphantly, "I don't know _what_ is!" + +Bessie remained silent, but her sister said impulsively, "I don't +believe it, ma--not what you say, but about Minnie Clyde's engagement. +Mr Mawley's going there proves nothing, as Bessie said; and, as for +Mrs Clyde, I believe she would smile in that graceful way of hers--I +hate fine people!--and say nothing if you told her that her house was on +fire! The curate is always gadding about, and Minnie is a pretty girl; +so, of course, he likes to go there and see her; but, I know, that she +does not care twopence for him." + +"Ah, you may say so, my dear; but _I_ know better. She would jump to +have him. All girls like handsome young clergymen, as I know to my +cost. Ah, Mr Lorton," went on Lady Dasher, with a sad expressive shake +of her head, "marriage is a sad lottery, a sad lottery! I once thought +of marrying into the church, too, when my poor dear papa was alive. +Perhaps it would have been a happier lot for me if I had done so! He +was such a dear, nice clergyman, and looked so well in his canonicals-- +such a truly evangelical minister! I could listen to his sermons for +hours without feeling the slightest fatigue!" + +"Thank goodness, then, he wasn't our papa!" exclaimed the saucy +Seraphine. "I'm certain that _I_ wouldn't have been able to listen to +his sermons so long!" + +"Ah, my dear," groaned her mother at her levity, "always frivolous, +Seraphine! I'm afraid you will never marry a pious, holy man, as I +would wish!" + +"Not if I know it, ma!" she retorted, so heartily that both her sister +Bessie and I--in spite of my anxiety about Min--could not but join in +her catching laughter. "No," continued the pert and impetuous young +lady, "when I enter the holy estate of matrimony I shall choose a gay +soldier laddie. None of your solemn-faced parsons for me! If they were +all like our good old vicar, whom I would take to-morrow if he asked me, +it would be quite a different thing; but they are not. They are all too +steady and starch and stiff now-a-days. They look as if butter would +not melt in their mouths!" + +"Ah, my dear!" said her mother, "you will not think so by-and-by. +`Beggars mustn't be choosers.' You have got nothing but your face for +your fortune, you know, although it would have been very different if my +poor dear papa had been alive!" + +"What, my face, ma?" said her dutiful daughter, "I'm sure I hope not! +Really, I'm very well satisfied with it;" and, getting up and going to +the mirror, she set about altering the riband in her hair, humming the +while the old ballad-- + + "`My face is my fortune, kind sir,' she said, + `Kind sir,' she said, `sir,' she said; + `My face is my fortune, kind sir,' she said." + +I did not like to press any more inquiries with reference to Mr +Mawley's rumoured engagement, thinking they would look too pointed, +disclosing my interest in the affair,--however much I was transported +with the feelings of mingled jealousy, doubt, and uncertainty, that were +preying on my heart; consequently, I now took my leave, all the +suspicions and fears, which Shuffler's news had given rise to, more rife +than ever:--the renewed hope that Miss Pimpernell's cheery address had +inspired me with, completely dispelled. + +I'm afraid my anxiety was only too apparent; for, Seraphine Dasher +whispered to me as I went out, "I don't believe a word of it, there! It +is only one of those absurd `true stories' that ma is always getting +hold of." + +But I wouldn't be comforted. + +It was only likely enough. Mawley was constantly going there, as Lady +Dasher had said, and Mrs Clyde encouraged him, there could be no doubt; +there must be something in it, or these reports would never have got +about. "There is never any smoke without fire." + +Besides, Min herself did not dislike the curate as I did. + +I could see that plainly for myself the night of that birthday party at +her house. His insinuating address and treacherous advances had +probably succeeded at last in entrapping her affections. + +False, cruel girl that she was, how could she encourage me as she had +done, to nurse delusive hopes which, as she must have known, would only +end in disappointment! What had been probably sport to her was death to +me! + +And yet, I _could_ not believe it of her. + +My pure angel-natured Min, with her darling madonna-like face and +honest, trustful grey eyes, to act like this? + +No. It could not be. It was impossible. + +Still, the very next day I saw her walking out alone with the curate. + +It must be true, then, I thought; and I ground my teeth in anguish. + +I determined to avoid her, never passing her house as I had been +previously accustomed to; and, only bowing coldly when I met her in the +street. + +At last she spoke to me one day, as I was coming out of the vicarage. + +She was just going to knock at the door; so I encountered her face to +face on the step, without a chance of escape. + +She held out her hand to me. + +I took it mechanically, and then let it drop; raising my hat at the same +time, without saying a word. + +She addressed me with heightened colour and a wistful look in the deep, +grey eyes. + +"Why are you so angry with me, Frank?" she asked in her sweet, low +voice, which had a slight tremble in it as she spoke. "What have I done +to offend you? You never stop and speak to me now, never call at our +house, and always pass me by with a cold frigid bow! Have I done +anything to offend you, Frank?" she entreated again. "If so, tell me; +and I will beg your pardon, for it must have been unintentional on my +part?" + +I was foolish, and proud, and conceited. I thought that I would not +allow myself to be deceived twice. + +I was bitter and rude. I made a mockery of all the friendly overtures +which she made so lovingly with all the coy bashfulness of her maiden +heart. + +I could have strangled myself afterwards, when I thought it all over! + +"I'm not aware, Miss Clyde," said I, as stiffly as you please--just as +if she were a stranger to me, and not the dear Min whom I knew and loved +so well--"I am not aware that there is any necessity for your asking my +forgiveness:--if you cannot suggest to yourself the reason for my +altered manner, words on my part would be useless indeed!" + +I spoke thus harshly to her, and coldly, when my heart was almost +breaking the while. + +"And is that all you have got to say to me, Frank?" she said, still in +the same dear, tender, entreating voice, and with glistening eyes. + +My sternness was nearly melted; but I continued to hold out and stand +upon my dignity. + +"I have nothing more to add, Miss Clyde," I said, with another +Grandisonian bow. + +"Then, Mr Lorton," she said, her grey eyes flashing, and her whole dear +little self roused into a fiery, impulsive little Min--she looked +glorious in her pique!--"then, Mr Lorton, I will not seek to detain you +further--let me pass, sir!" she added passionately, as, relenting of my +behaviour, I tried to stop her and explain my conduct--"Let me pass, +sir! I do not wish to hear another word from you!" + +And she walked, as stately as a little queen, into the hall of the +vicarage, tossing up her sweet little dimpled chin proudly; while, I?-- +went back disconsolately home, my heart torn with conflicting emotions. + +Was I right, or wrong? + +Perhaps the rumour of her engagement had not the slightest foundation, +in fact. + +However, it was too late now to think about that! + +All was over. + +We were parted for ever! + + + +CHAPTER TWELVE. + +ON THE RIVER. + + We left behind the painted buoy + That tosses at the harbour mouth; + And madly danced our heart with joy, + As fast we fleeted to the south. + How fresh was every sight and sound + On open main, on winding shore! + We knew the merry world was round, + And we might sail for evermore. + +"Frank, what do you mean by behaving so unkindly to Minnie Clyde?" was +the opening salutation of little Miss Pimpernell to me, the same +evening, when I called round again at the vicarage, like Telemachus, in +search of consolation. + +I was so utterly miserable and disheartened at the conviction that +everything was over between Min and myself--at the sudden collapse of +all my eager hopes and ardent longings--that I felt I must speak to +somebody and unbosom myself; or else I should go out of my senses. + +"_I_ behave unkindly to Miss Clyde!" I exclaimed, in astonishment at +her thus addressing me, before I could get out a word as to why I had +come to see her--"I--I--I--don't know what you mean, Miss Pimpernell?" + +"You know, or ought to know very well, Frank, without my telling you," +she rejoined; and there was a grave tone in her voice, for which I could +not account. + +However, the dear old lady did not leave me long in doubt. + +She was never in the habit of "beating about the bush;" but always spoke +out straight, plump and plain, to the point. + +"Really, my boy," she continued, "I think there is no excuse for your +acting so strangely to the poor little girl, after all your attentions +and long intimacy!" + +"But, Miss Pimpernell," I commenced; however, she quickly interrupted +me. + +"`But me no buts,' Frank Lorton," she said, with more determination and +severity than she had ever used to me since I had known her. "I'm quite +angry with you. You have disappointed all my expectations, when I +thought I knew your character so well, too! Learn, that there is no one +I despise so much as a male flirt. Oh, Frank! I did not think you had +a grain of such little-mindedness in you! I believed you to be +straightforward, and earnest, and true. I'm sadly disappointed in you, +my boy; sadly disappointed!" and she shook her head reproachfully. + +It was very hard being attacked in this way, when I had come for +consolation! + +I had thought myself to be the injured party, whose wounds would have +been bound up, and oil and wine inpoured by the good Samaritan to whom I +had always looked as my staunchest ally; yet, here she was, upbraiding +me as a heartless deceiver, a role which I had never played in my life! + +I did not know what to make of it. + +What was she driving at? + +"I assure you, Miss Pimpernell," I said with all the earnestness which +the circumstances really warranted, "that I have not behaved in any way, +to my knowledge, of which you might be ashamed for my sake. I came in +this evening to ask your sympathy; and, here, you accuse me like this, +without waiting to hear a word I have to say! Miss Pimpernell, you are +unjust to me. I will go." + +And I made as if to leave the room in a huff. + +"Stop, Frank," said the dear little old lady, rising to her feet, and +speaking to me again with something of her old cordial manner--"You +speak candidly; and I've always known you to tell the truth, so I won't +doubt you now. Perhaps things have only got into a muddle after all. +Let me see if I cannot get to the bottom of it, and set them straight +for you! You will not deny, I suppose, Frank, that up to a short time +since you've been in the habit of paying a good deal of attention to +Minnie Clyde?" + +"Miss Clyde is nothing to me now!" I said grandly: I did not deceive +her, however, nor turn her from her purpose. + +"Wait a minute, my boy, and hear me out. You won't deny that you have +been what you call `spoony,' in your abominable slang, eh, Frank?" she +repeated, with a knowing glance from her beady black eyes. + +"Pay her attention, Miss Pimpernell," I said impetuously. "Good +heavens! Why, at one time I would have died for her, and let my body be +cut into little pieces, if it would only have done her any good!" + +"Softly, Frank," responded the old lady. "I don't think that _would_ +have done her any good, or you either, for that matter! But, why have +you changed towards her, Frank? I never thought you so false and +fickle, my boy. She came in here to see me to-day, looking very excited +and unhappy; and when she had sat down--there, in that very chair you +are now sitting in," continued Miss Pimpernell, emphasising her words by +pointing to the corner I occupied, "and I asked her soothingly what +distressed her, she burst into tears, and sobbed as if her little heart +would break. I declare, my boy," said the warm-hearted little body, +with a husky cough, "I almost cried myself in company. However, I got +it all out of her afterwards. It seems to me, Frank, that you have +behaved very unkindly to her. She thought she had offended you in some +way of which she declared that she was perfectly ignorant: she had asked +you, she said, but you would not tell her--treating her as if she were a +perfect stranger. She's a sensitive girl, Frank, and you have hurt her +feelings to the quick! Now, what is the reason of this--do you care for +her still?" + +"Care for her! Miss Pimpernell," I said. "Why I love her--although I +did not intend telling you yet." + +"As if I didn't know all about that already," said the old lady, +laughing cheerily. "Oh, you lovers, you lovers! You are just for all +the world like a herd of wild ostriches, that stick their heads in the +bush, and fancy that they are completely concealed from observation! +All of you imagine, that, because you do not take people into your +confidence, they are as blind as you are! Can't they see all that is +going on well enough; don't your very looks, much less your actions, +betray you? Why, Frank, I knew all about your case weeks ago, my boy!-- +without any information from you or anybody else! Besides, you know, I +_ought_ to have some _little_ experience in such matters by this time; +for, every boy and girl in the parish has made me their confidante for +years and years past!" and she laughed again. + +Miss Pimpernell was once more her cheery old self, quite restored to her +normal condition of good humour. + +No one, I believe, ever saw her "put out" for more than five minutes +consecutively at the outside; and very seldom for so long, at that. + +"Ah!" I ejaculated with a deep sigh, "I wish I had told you before. +Now, it is too late!" + +"Too late!" she rejoined, briskly. "Too late! Nonsense; it's `never +too late to mend.'" + +"It is in some cases," I said, as mournfully as Lady Dasher could have +spoken; "and this is one of them!" + +It was all over, I thought, so, why talk about it any more? What was +done couldn't be helped! + +"Rubbish!" replied Miss Pimpernell; "you've had a tiff with her, and +think you have parted for ever! You see, I know all about it without +your telling me. You lovers are ever quarrelling and making up again; +though, how you manage it, I can't think. But, Frank, there must always +be two to make a quarrel, and Minnie Clyde does not seem to have been +one to yours. Tell me why you have altered so towards her; and, let us +see whether old Sally cannot mend matters for you." + +She looked at me so kindly that I made a clean breast of all my +troubles. + +"Well, Frank!" she exclaimed, when I had got to the end of my story, +"you are a big stupid, in spite of all your cleverness! You are not a +bit sharper than the rest of your sex:--a woman has twice the insight of +any of you lords of creation! Did I not tell you, not to believe that +absurd story about Mr Mawley long ago--that it was only a silly tale of +Shuffler's, and not worth a moment's credence? But, you wouldn't +believe me; and, here you have been knocking your head against a wall +just on account of that cock-and-a-bull-story, and nothing else! Ah, +you lovers will never learn common sense! If it wasn't for us old +ladies, you would get into such fine scrapes that you would never get +out of them, I can tell you!" + +"And you are sure it is not true, Miss Pimpernell?" I asked, +imploringly. + +"Certainly, Frank. Where are your eyes? You are as blind as a mole, my +boy." + +"O, Miss Pimpernell!" I exclaimed, in remorse at my hasty conduct, +"what shall I do to make my peace once more with her? She will never +speak to me again, I know, unless you intercede for me, and tell her how +the misunderstanding arose." + +"You have been very foolish, Frank," said my kind old friend; "but I +will try what I can do for you. You ought to have known that she did +not care for Mr Mawley--not in the way you mean; and, as for marrying +him, why, the curate himself does not dream of such a thing. I cannot +imagine how you could have been so blind!" + +"But you _will_ help me, Miss Pimpernell, won't you?" I entreated. + +"Well, my boy, I will tell Minnie what you have just told me about your +delusion, and say that you are very sorry for having treated her so +badly." + +"And tell her," I interposed, "that she's dearer to me than ever." + +"I will do nothing of the sort," hastily replied the old lady. "I am +not going to give Miss Spight another chance of calling me `a wretched +old match-maker,' as she did once! No, Master Frank, you must do all +your love-making yourself, my boy. I did not tell you that Minnie cares +for you, you know; and, I can't say whether she does, or no. She's only +very unhappy at your considering her no longer in the light of a friend, +and has said nothing to lead me to imagine anything more than that. She +would not have spoken to me at all about it, I'm confident, if she had +not happened to have seen you only a moment before, and had her +sensitive little heart wounded by your coldness! Why don't you tell her +yourself, Frank, what you wish me to say for you?" + +"So I would, Miss Pimpernell, at once," I replied, "if I only had an +opportunity; but I never get a chance of seeing her alone." + +"Why don't you make one, Frank?" said she. "For a young fellow of the +day, you are wonderfully bashful and shy, not to be able to tell the +girl of your heart that you love her! I declare, if I had only done +what they wanted me, I would have proposed for half of the wives of the +present married men of my acquaintance! When I was a girl, gentlemen +seemed to have twice the ardour about them that they have now! You are +all, now-a-days, like a pack of boarding-school misses, and have to be +as tenderly coaxed on into proposing, as if _you_ were the wooed and not +the wooers. You don't understand what ladies like," continued the old +lady, who, like most elderly maidens, had a strong spice of the romantic +in her composition; "they prefer having their affections taken by +assault instead of all this shilly-shallying and faint-heartedness. If +I had had my choice, when I thought, as girls will think, of such +things, I would have liked my lover to carry me off like those gallant +knights did in the good old days that we read of!" + +"And had him prosecuted for abduction," said I, laughing at her +enthusiasm. + +"Well, well, Frank," she said, laughing too, "I don't mean to advise you +to go to that extent; yet, you might easily find an opportunity to speak +to Minnie Clyde, if you only set your wits to work. There's the school +treat on Thursday, won't that do for you?" + +"Really," I replied, "I never thought of that, Miss Pimpernell; indeed I +had made up my mind not to go; and--" + +"Why shouldn't you?" said the energetic little old lady, interrupting +me. "What better chance could you have, I should like to know--a nice +long day in the country, a picnic excursion, a pleasant party, with lots +of openings for private conversation? Dear me, Frank, you are not half +a lover! If I were a handsome young fellow like you, I would soon cut +you out, my boy! Only be bold and speak out to her. Girls like +boldness. I wouldn't have given twopence for a bashful man when I was +young." + +"So I will, Miss Pimpernell," said I, carried away by her energy and +enthusiasm; "I will go to the school treat--that is, if you will only +kindly see _Miss Clyde_ for me"--I was rather diffident of letting Miss +Pimpernell know of the friendly footing we had been on, regarding +Christian nomenclature--"beforehand, and get her to forgive me. You +will, won't you, dear Miss Pimpernell?" + +"None of your soft-sawder, Master Frank," replied the old lady; "I will +do what I can to make your peace, as I promised; but, as to anything +further, you must be a man, and speak up for yourself." + +"I will, you may rely," I said, determined to bring matters to an issue +ere the week should close. + +Before Thursday came, however, I knew that Miss Pimpernell had kept her +word in interceding for me, and that Min had quite forgiven me. + +She was "friends with me once more," I was assured; for, when I passed +her window the next evening, in fear and trembling lest she should still +be hostile and not recognise me, she bowed and smiled to me in her own +old sweet way, as she used to do before my fit of jealousy and our +consequent estrangement. + +Oh! how ardently I looked forwards to the approaching school treat. I +was then resolved to learn whether she loved me or no. "Faint heart +never won fair lady," as Miss Pimpernell had told me; I would deserve +her reproach no longer. + +Thursday arrived at length, and with it the school treat. + +This summer "outing" had been an institution of annual celebration by +our vicar long before it became a habit of London clergymen to send +columns of appeals to the benevolent in the daily papers to assist the +poor children of their respective congregations towards having "a day's +pleasuring in the country." + +Our vicar, however, was not one of those who thus "passed round the hat" +to strange laity! No, he made _his_ institution entirely a self- +supporting one; and his school-children had the additional pleasure of +knowing, that, they assisted in paying for their treat themselves, +earning it in advance, with no thanks to "charity," or strangers, all +the same. + +For some two months beforehand, the little ones used to deposit a weekly +penny for this special purpose; and, when their contributions were +thought to nearly amount to a shilling each, the fund was held +sufficient to carry out the long-looked-for treat--although, of course, +the vicar and other kindly-disposed persons would largely help to make +the affair go off with the eclat and dignity suited to the occasion, all +of which resulted in its being turned into a general picnic for the +parish. + +The anniversary of the fete this year, was celebrated with even grander +effect than any former ones had been, imposing and satisfactory though +they were held at the time to be. Richmond Park was the scene of our +festivities; and, not only had the vicar caused to be provided a couple +of roomy four-horse omnibuses, the leading one of which sported a band, +to accommodate the rank and file of the juveniles under the escort of +such of their mothers as could spare the time to accompany them; but, +those children who had particularly distinguished themselves during the +year for good conduct, were permitted to go in the gondola, in which we +oldsters proceeded, to the same destination by water. It was arranged +that the "'buses" should meet us at Richmond, where both descriptions of +conveyances were to disgorge their motley contents; and, the several and +hitherto-severed parties, joining issue, would set about making as +pleasant a day of it as could be effected under the circumstances. + +A "gondola" seems at first sight an anachronism on the Thames; still, on +mature reflection, there does not appear to be any reason why we should +not indulge in this respect equally as well as the inhabitants of much- +idealised dirty Venice. + +Whether you agree with me or not, however, I can tell you that there +_are_ gondolas to be seen on our great watery highway--heavy barges, +with bluff bows and fictitious awnings and problematical cushions, that +may be had on hire for the asking, at most of the principal boating +places along the banks from Chelsea to Chiswick. + +On first starting, one missed the many romantic associations with which +the name of our floating vehicle was generally connected; yet, +suggestive fancy could readily supply their place with kindred ideas +culled from our more prosaic surroundings. We had, it is true, no +crimson-sashed, ragged, ballet-costumed gondolier to "ply the measured +oar;" because, in the first instance, we did not row up at all. We were +a trifle too wise in our generation to pull up the river in a lumbering +barge under a broiling sun, and fancy we were amusing ourselves! No, we +had a horse and a tow-rope; and, went on our way gaily without exertion! + +Just you volunteer, for once, to row an excursion party up to +Richmond:--you'll enjoy it, I promise you! It is regular treadmill +work; see, if you won't afterwards think our plan the best, and adopt +it, too, or I'm no prophet, that's all! + +Our gondolier "was not;" but the mounted jockey who bestrode our towing +horse _was_; and, in lieu of waking the echoes with choice extracts from +Tasso in the liquid Venesian or harsh, gritty Tuscan dialect, _he_ +occasionally beguiled his monotonous jog-trot with a plaintive ballad, +in which he rehearsed the charms of a certain "Pretty little Sarah;" or +else, "made the welkin ring"--though what a "welkin" is, I have never +yet been able to discover--with repeated injunctions to his somewhat +lazy steed to "gee whup" and "gee wo!" + +We had no "Bridge of Sighs," to pursue the parallel, where the roving +eye might detect "a palace and a prison on either hand;" but, in its +stead, we could gaze at the festooned chains of Hammersmith Suspension +Bridge in all its simple beauty, and see the Soapworks and the Mall on +the hither and further shore. Our course led, not through serpentine +canals and past Doges' palaces, gaudy with the lavish adornments of +tricky Byzantine architecture; nor could we expect to see "lions" as +historical as those which ornament the facade of Saint Mark's. However, +as we glided up against the tide, in slow but steady progress, by +willowy banks and osiered eyots, our boat yawning in and out and +requiring a stiff weather helm to keep her course, we often caught +glimpses of ivy-wreathed churches, charming villa residences and gothic +summer-houses, peeping out from amidst the river-lining trees--with a +verdant meadow here and there to break the view, its smoothly-mown +surface sweeping down to the water's edge; while, we knew, also, that +the stream which bore us on its bosom flowed over stakes and hurdles +that our indigo-dyed ancestors, the ancient Britons, had planted in its +bed, long before Caesar's conquering legions crossed the channel, or +Venice possessed "a local habitation and a name." + +You may say, probably, that all this is a regular rigmarole of nonsense; +but, what else would you have? + +It was a nice, beautiful, hot summer day, as our gondola glided on +Richmondwards. + +We were a merry party, all in all, passing the time with genial and +general conversation--and, occasionally, graver talk--as the mood suited +us. The cheerful voices of the children, who were packed as tightly as +herrings in a barrel in the bows of our craft, and their happy laughter, +chimed in with the wash of the tide as it swept by the sides of our +gallant barque, hurrying down to meet the flood at Gravesend. The larks +were singing madly in the blue sky overhead. Each and all completed the +harmony of the scene, affording us enjoyment in turn. + +Disgusted apparently with our merriment and frivolity, Miss Spight, +shortly after we started, introduced a polemical discussion. + +"My dear sir," said she to the vicar, our captain and coxswain in chief, +who stately sat in the sternsheets of the gondola, "don't you think +Romanism is getting very rife in the parish? They are building a new +nunnery, I hear, in the main road; and they are going to set about a +chapel, too, I'm told." + +"That won't hurt us," said the vicar, sententiously. He disliked +sectarian disputes excessively, and always avoided them if he could. + +"But, don't you think," persisted Miss Spight, "that we ought to prevent +this in some way?" + +"I was going to speak to you on the very point to-day, sir," said Mr +Mawley, before the vicar could answer. "Had we not better have a course +of controversial lectures, each giving one in turn?" + +"No, Mawley," replied the vicar, "since I have had the living, I have +never yet permitted sectarian disputations to have a place in my pulpit; +and, never will I do so as long as I live! We were instructed to preach +the Gospel by our Saviour, not to wage war against this or that creed; +and the Gospel is one of peace and love. Don't you remember how Saint +John, when he was upwards of fourscore years, continually taught this by +his constant text, `Little children, love one another?' Let us allow +men to judge us by our works. The labour of Protestantism will not be +accomplished by the pharisaical mode of priding ourselves on our faith, +and damning that of every one else! Our mission is to preach the Gospel +pure and simple. Too much time, too much money, too much of true +religion is wasted, in our common custom of trying to proselytise +others! We should look at home first, Mawley." + +"Still, sir," said the curate, "it is surely our mission to convert the +heathen?" + +"I do not argue against that," said the vicar. "God forbid that I +should! But what I say is, that we are too apt, in seeking for foreign +fields, to neglect the duty that lies nearer to us at home." + +"It is a noble work, converting the heathen, though," said Miss Spight. + +"That's just what I mean," responded our pastor. "All young minds are +impressed with this romantic view of religion. It appears much nobler +to go abroad as a missionary to the burning deserts of Africa, and to +run the risk of being eaten up by cannibals, to working in this +benighted land of ours, which needs conversion just as much as the +negroes and Hindoos! But, there's no romance about visiting dirty +alleys in London!" + +"There are the Scripture readers and district visitors, are there not?" +said Mr Mawley. + +"True," replied the vicar, "and I would be the last to disparage their +earnest efforts. What I meant was, that, while we give hundreds of +pounds to foreign missions, pence are grudged for home work! There's +the Society for the Conversion of the Jews, for instance, to which I +have sometimes to give up my pulpit. Now, I dare say, it is a very +meritorious society, but how many Jews does it gain over really to +Christianity in return for the large sums that its travelling +secretaries collect every year?" + +"These travelling secretaries," said I, "are what the _Saturday Review_ +would call `spiritual bagmen,' or `commercial travellers in the +missionary line.'" + +"And not very far out, either," said the vicar, smiling. "They are paid +a salary, at all events, if they do not get a commission, to beg as much +money as they can for the society to which they belong; and they do +their work well, too! They succeed in carrying off an amount of money +from poor parishes, which if laid out in the places where it is +garnered, instead of being devoted to alien expenditure, would do far +more good, and better advance the work of the Gospel than the conversion +of a few renegade Jews, whose reclamation is, in the majority of cases, +but a farce!" + +"But, my dear sir!"--exclaimed Mr Mawley, completely shocked at this +overturning of all his prejudices. + +"Hear me out," continued the vicar; "you must not misunderstand me. I'm +not opposed to the principles of missions; but, to their being promoted +to the disregard of all other considerations. Saint Paul says that we +should do good to all, and especially to such as are `of the household +of faith.' Our missionary societies never seem to consider this. The +endless number of charity sermons that we have to preach for their aid, +not only extracts too much of what should be spent for the benefit of +our own special communities, but militates against our getting +contributions to other works of greater utility. Our congregations +become so deadened by _these_ repeated onslaughts on their benevolence, +that they button up their pockets and respond in only a half-hearted way +when we claim their assistance for _our own_ poor and parish. Let us, I +say, look at home first, and reclaim the lost, the fallen, the destitute +in our streets; let us convert our own `heathen,'--our murderers, our +drunkards, our wife-beaters, our thieves, our adulterers; and, _then_, +let us talk of converting Hindoos and regenerating the Jews! Our duty, +Mawley, as I hold my commission, is to preach Christ's gospel in all its +truth and simplicity and love. We do not want to run down this or that +creed, however reprehensible we may think it. Let us be judged by our +deeds, and acts, and words. Let us show forth _our_ way of salvation, +as we have learnt it: another authority, greater than us, will tell the +world in his own good time which is _the_ faith!" + +A short pause ensued, after the vicar had thus spoken; none of us cared, +for the moment, to pass on to the empty nothings of every-day talk. + +Seraphine Dasher was the first to break the silence. + +Seeing that Miss Spight had turned to address Monsieur Parole d'Honneur, +who sat by her side, the good-natured Frenchman having accompanied us, +to "assist at the fete" of his friend, "the good vicaire," as he said, +the wicked little seraph created a diversion. + +"Gracious, Miss Spight," she exclaimed, "how you are flirting!" + +The indignation of the austere virgin, and the warmth with which she +repelled this accusation, caused us all so much amusement, that in +another moment or two we were in the full swing again of our ordinary +chatter. + +As we passed under Barnes railway bridge, where the tide was rushing +through the arches with all the pent-up waters of the reach beyond, Min, +who had been hitherto apparently distrait, like myself, not having +spoken, observed, that, the sight of a river flowing along always made +her feel reflective and sad. + +"It recalls to my mind," said she, "those lines of Longfellow's, from +the _Coplas de Manrique_. + + "`Our lives are rivers, gliding free, + To that unfathom'd boundless sea, + The silent grave! + Thither all earthly pomp and boast + Roll, to be swallowed up and lost + In one dark wave.'" + +"I prefer," said I, "Tennyson's _Brook_. Our laureate's description of +a moving river is not so sombre as that of the American poet; and, +besides, has more life and action about it." + +"How many different poets have sung the praises of the Thames," said +Miss Pimpernell. "I suppose more poetry,--good, bad, and indifferent-- +has been written about it, than for all the other rivers of the world +combined." + +"You are right, my dear," said the vicar; "more, by a good deal! The +Jordan has been distinguished in Holy Writ especially; Horner has +celebrated the Xanthus and Simois, and Horace the tawny Tiber; the +rivers of Spain have been painted by Calderon, Lope de Vega and Aldana; +the Rhine and its legends sang of by Uhland and Goethe and Schiller--not +to speak of the fabled Nile, as it was in the days of Sesostris, when +Herodotus wrote of it; and the Danube, the Po, and the Arno,--all rivers +of the old world, that have been described by a thousand poets. But, +above all these, the Thames has furnished a more frequent theme, and for +great poets, too! Every aspirant for the immortal bays has tried his +'prentice hand on it, from Chaucer, in excelsis, down to the poet Close +at the foot of the Parnassian ladder! + +"We were talking of the Thames," continued the vicar, pouring out a +flood of archaeological reminiscences--"The great reason why it is so +suggestive, beyond the great practical fact that it is the silent +highway of the fleets of nations, is, that it is also indissolubly bound +up, as well, with by-gone memories of people that have lived and died, +to the glory and disgrace of history--of places whose bare names we +cherish and love! Every step, almost, along its banks is sacred to some +noble name. `Stat magno nominis umbra' should be its motto. Strawberry +Hill reminds you of witty, keen-sighted Horace Walpole, and his +gossiping chit-chat concerning wrangling princes, feeble-minded +ministers, and all the other imbecilities of the last century. +Twickenham brings back to one, bitter-tongued Pope, his distorted body +and waspish mind. Richmond Hill recalls the Earl of Chatham in his +enforced retirement, his gout, and the memorable theatrical speech he +made on the floor of the House of Lords, at the time of our greatest +national triumph and exertion, that closed his public life. Further up +the stream, we come to old Windsor Castle, to be reminded of bluff +Bluebeard, bigamous, wicked, king Hal; higher still, we are at Oxford, +the nursery of our Church, the `alma mater' of our learning. Lower +down, at Whitehall stairs, we are face to face again with Roundheads, +and regicides, and gunpowder plots; lower still, and we are at the +Tower, with its cruel tyrannies and beheadings of traitors and patriots; +and then, we find ourselves amidst a sea of masts which bear the English +flag to the uttermost parts of the earth. No wonder our river has been +so poetical:--it has deserved it! But, really, if all the poems that +have been written in its honour could be collected in one volume, what a +prodigious tome it would be!--what a medley of versification it would +present!" + +"Sure you've forgotten the Shannon entirely," observed Lady Dasher in +her plaintive way. + +She was certainly waking up from her normal melancholic condition; for, +before this, she had been seen to smile--a phenomenon never noticed in +her before by her oldest acquaintance. + +"You have quite forgotten the Shannon! My poor dear papa, when he was +alive, used to say that it was the finest river in the world. I +remember he had a favourite song about it--I don't know if I quite +recollect it now, but, I'll try." + +"Do, Lady Dasher, do," said Mr Mawley, who, having been paying great +attention to Bessie the while, wished, I suppose, to ingratiate himself +with her mother. + +"I must put on the brogue, you know," said she, looking round with an +affectation of shyness, which was most incongruous on her melancholy +visage; it was just like a death's head trying to grin, I thought to +myself;--and then, she commenced, in a thin, quavering voice, the lay of +the departed earl, her "poor dear papa." + + "`O! Limerick is be-yewtifool, as iveryba-ady knows, + And round about the city walls the reever Shannon flows; + But 'tis not the reever, nor the feesh, that preys upon my mind, + Nor, with the town of Limerick have I any fault to find!'" + +"Ah! Very nice indeed! Thank you, Lady Dasher, thank you!" said the +vicar, when she had got thus far, and succeeded in arresting the +progress of her ladyship's melody; otherwise, she might have gone on the +live-long summer day with the halting ditty, for it consisted, as she +subsequently told us, of no less than five-and-forty verses, all in the +same pleasant strain! + +"I don't think," said I, to change the conversation, "that poetry is +nearly as highly regarded in the present day, as it was some forty years +back or so--if one may judge by the biographies of literary men of that +time." + +"But, it sells more readily," said Mr Mawley; "not only do fresh +debutantes appear, but new editions of the old poets come out daily." + +"That may be," said I. "But they are not nearly so highly appreciated. +I suppose it is because poetry is not so much a rarity now. We have so +many mediocre poets, that our taste is more exigent. I dare say, if a +very bright, particular star should arise, we would honour him; but we +have no bright particular star; and, thus, we learn to read poetry +without reflection. Forty years ago, people used to talk over the last +production of the muse, and canvas its merits in coffee-rooms all over +the town; now, we only dash through it, as we would take up the last new +novel, or the evening paper, thinking no more about it!" + +"When I was younger," said Miss Spight--she didn't say when she was +"young," mark you--"no young gentlewoman's education would have been +thought complete without a course of the best poets, such as Milton's +_Paradise Lost_." + +"Which nine out of ten of the people who speak about it now, never +read," said I--and, Miss Spight did not reply. + +"What queer people poets are, generally speaking," said Mr Mawley. + +"Do you think so?" said I. + +"Yes, I do," he replied. "I would divide poets into three great +classes, which I would call respectively the enthusiastic school, the +water-cart school, and the horse-going-round-in-the-mill school." + +"O-oh, Mr Mawley!" exclaimed Bessie Dasher, in the unmeaning manner +common to young ladies, in lieu of saying anything, when they have got +nothing to say: the exclamation expressing either astonishment, horror, +alarm, or rebuke, as the case may require. + +"Instance, instance! Name, name!" said I, keeping the curate up to the +mark. + +"Well, I will give you Horner, and Dante, Goethe, Byron, and, perhaps, +Tennyson, from which to take your choice amongst those whom I call the +enthusiastic school; Mrs Hemans, and others of her tearful race, in the +second; and, in the third order, the majority of those who have spoilt +good ink and paper, from Dryden down to Martin F Tupper." + +"What, no exceptions; not even my favourite Longfellow?" asked Min. + +"No," said Mr Mawley, "not one--although Longfellow belongs more by +rights to the water-cart line. The fact is," continued he, fairly +started on his hobby, "that Pegasus, the charger of Mount Parnassus, is +a most eccentric animal, who can be made to metamorphose himself so +completely according to the skill and ability or weakness of his rider, +that even Apollo would not recognise him sometimes! When backed by an +intrepid spirit, like the grand heroic poets, Pegasus is the stately +war-horse eager for the fray, and sniffing the battle from afar; or +else, controlled by the nervous reins of genius like that of Shelley and +Coleridge, he appears as the high-mettled racer, pure-blooded and +finely-trained, who may win some great race, but is unfit for any +ordinary work; or, again, when ridden by a Wordsworth, he plods along +wearily, with lack-lustre eyes, dragging a heavy load, such as _The +Excursion_, behind him!" + +What the curate might have said further was lost to his hearers. Just +at this moment, on turning a bend of the river, the pretty little low- +arched bridge that spans it in front of Richmond came in sight; seeing +which, the children raised such a shout of joy in the bows of the +gondola, that our conversation shunted into a fresh channel, while our +teamster, urging his horse by a multitude of "gee wo's," into a brisk +trot, tightened our tow-rope and led us up in fine style to our goal. + +A short distance from the landing-place under the bridge, we found the +detachments that had gone by road, awaiting us. Joining company, we +proceeded together to the park, and set about our picnic in the usual +harum-scarum fashion, chasing truant children, losing one another, +finding one another, making merry over the most dire mishaps, and +enjoying the whole thing hugely--elders, juveniles, and all--from +beginning to end. + +The vicar made a perfect boy of himself. With a charming gleefulness, +he did the most outrageous things--at which Master Adolphus, aetat +twelve, would have turned up his nose, as being much beneath his years +and dignity. He said he did it only to amuse the children; but, he took +such an active part in the games he instituted, that we declared that he +joined in them for his own personal gratification. + +Monsieur Parole d'Honneur, too, who was the gayest of the gay, specially +distinguished himself for his vaulting powers in a sport which he +entitled in his broken English manner "ze leap of ze frog;" and, as for +grave Doctor Batson, whom we all thought so formal and dignified in his +professional tether, why, the way in which he "stuck in his twopenny," +as the boys said, and "gave a `back,'" was a caution to the lookers-on! + +Then we had a substantial "soldier's tea" in and around a little cottage +conveniently-situated close to the park:--there, we boiled our kettles, +and brewed great jorums of straw-coloured water, at the sight of which a +Chinaman would have been filled with horror, impregnated as it was with +the taste of new tin and the flavour of moist brown sugar and milk. The +children enjoyed it, however, in conjunction with clothes baskets full +of sliced bread-and-butter, and buns and cake galore:-- so, our main +consideration was satisfied. + +The whole thing passed off well, the only mishap, throughout the day, +arising from Horner having filled Miss Spight's galoshes with hot tea; +but, as she did not happen to be wearing them at the time, the accident +was not of much consequence, although she soundly rated the young +gentleman for his awkwardness. + +Everybody, too, was satisfied--the vicar and Miss Pimpernell, at the +success of the treat and the pleasure of the school-children; the +churchwardens, that the expenses did not come out of their pockets; Lady +Dasher, at Mr Mawley's attentions to her daughter, which she really +thought "quite marked;" and the rest of us, more youthful members of the +parish gathering, at the general delightfulness of the day's outing--the +excursion by water, the picnic in the park, the gipsying, the fresh +breeze, the bright sun, the everything! + +I was happy, too, although I had not yet had a chance of speaking to Min +privately--in the boat there were more listeners near than I cared for, +and on shore she was too busy entertaining a small crowd of toddlekins, +for whose delectation she told deeply-involved fairy stories, and wove +unlimited daisy-chains of intricate patterns and simple workmanship. +Still, I knew that before night closed, I should have the wished-for +opportunity of telling my tale; and, in the meantime, I was quite +contented to sit near her, and hear her sweet voice, and be certain that +she did not care for Mr Mawley after all! + +The day could not pass, however, without the curate and I having our +customary spar; and it happened in this wise. + +On our way down to the gondola, after packing up the omnibus contingent +of juveniles safely, in company with their mothers and a hecatomb of +emptied baskets, and seeing the party off with a parting cheer from both +sides, Miss Spight amiably suggested that she thought it was going to +rain; at which, of course, there arose a general outcry. + +"Dear me," said Miss Pimpernell, "I believe you are right, for, there +are the midges dancing, too! I hope none of you girls will get your new +bonnets spoilt! But, you needn't be alarmed, my dears," she added to +reassure us, "it is certain not to come down before morning, if you will +take an old woman's word for it." + +"You may believe Sally, and set your minds at ease," said the vicar. +"She's a rare judge of the weather, and as good as a farmer or sailor in +that respect." + +"Are the midges a sign of rain?" asked Min; "I never heard that before." + +"Yes, my dear," said Miss Pimpernell, seating herself in the gondola, +which we had now reached. "They always dance about twelve hours or so +before it rains." + +"Are there not some other signs given by animals, also, when there is +going to be a change in the weather?" asked Bessie Dasher. + +"Yes," said Mr Mawley, anxious, as usual, to show off his erudition, +"cows low, swallows fly near the ground, sheep bleat, and--" + +"Asses bray," said I, with emphasis. + +"So I hear," said he quickly. The curate was getting sharper than ever. + +"Ah," said I, "_that_ is only a `tu quoque!'" + +"What is that?" asked Bessie Dasher, thinking I was making use of some +term of virulent abuse, I verily believe. + +"Oh!" said Mr Mawley, who was in high feather at having retorted my cut +so brilliantly, "it is only a polite way of saying `you're another,' an +expression which I dare say you have often heard vulgar little boys in +the street make use of. I say, Lorton," he added, addressing me, "I +think that's one to me, eh?" + +"All right," said I, "score it up, if you like." + +And, we started down the stream homeward bound. + + + +CHAPTER THIRTEEN. + +"GOOD-NIGHT!" + + Era gia l'ora che volge 'l disio, + A' naviganti e 'ntenerisce il cuore, + Lo di ch' ban detto a' dolci amici addio, + E che lo nuova peregrin d'amore + Punge, se ode Squilla di lontano, + Che paja 'l giorno pianger che si muore! + + "Parting is such sweet sorrow, + That I could say good-night till it be morrow!" + +We were sitting side by side, Min and I, leaning over the gunwale of the +"gondola" which was rapidly gliding down the river; the stream being in +our favour, and our teamster on the towing path keeping his horse up to +a brisk trot, that caused us to proceed at a faster rate than we could +have pulled even a lighter boat. + +It was a lovely summer night, calm and still, with hardly a breath of +wind in the air; although, it was not at all unpleasantly close or +oppressive. + +A bright crescent moon was shining, touching up the trees that skirted +the bank with a flood of silvery-azure light, that brought out each twig +and particle of foliage in strong relief, and cast their trunks in +shade; while, the surface of the water, unstirred by the slightest +ripple, gleamed like a mirror of burnished steel, winding in and out, in +its serpentine course, between masses of dense shadow--until it was lost +to sight in the distance, behind a sudden bend, and a dark projecting +clump of willows and undergrowth. + +Our boat seemed to be the only floating thing for miles! + +Had it not been for an occasional twinkle from the far-off window of +some riparian villa, and the "whish" of a startled swan as it swerved +aside to allow the boat to sweep by, we might easily have imagined +ourselves traversing the bosom of one of those vast, solitary rivers of +the wilderness across the sea. + +The children were nearly all asleep, tired out with happiness in excess; +and, most of us were silent, being awed by the beauty of the evening +into voiceless admiration. + +A little girl near us, wakeful still, was breaking one of the daisy- +chains that Min had woven her at Richmond, and casting the pieces one by +one into the current as it hurried along:--the daisy cups sometimes +keeping pace with us, as our tow-rope slackened, and then falling +astern, on our horse trotting ahead once more. + +"Don't you remember," said I to Min, "those lines of Schiller's _Der +Jungling am Bache_? They seem appropriate to that little incident,"--I +continued, pointing to the small toddlekin, who was destroying the +daisy-chain:-- + + "`An der Quelle sass der Knabe + Blumen wand er sich zum Kranz, + Und er sah sie fortgerissen + Treiben in den wellen Tanz. + Und so fleihen meine Tage, + Wie die quelle rastlos hin! + Und so bleichet meine Jugend, + Wie die Kranze schnell verbluhn!'" + +"They are very pretty," said Min. "Still, do you know, as a rule I do +not think German poetry nice. It always sounds so harsh and guttural to +me, however tender and sentimental the words may be." + +"That may be true in some respects," I answered; "but if you hear it +well read, or sung, there is much more pathos and softness about it than +one is able to discern when simply skimming it over to oneself. Some of +Goethe's little ballads, for instance, such as `The Erl King,' and +others that Walter Scott has translated, are wonderfully beautiful; not +to speak of Uhland's poetry, and La Motte Fouque's charming _Undine_, +which is as pretty a poem as I have ever read." + +"I confess," said Min, "that I have not had any general experience of +German literature. Indeed, I have quite neglected it since I left +school; and then I only studied heavy books--such as _The History of +Frederick the Great_, that wearisome _Jungfrau von Orleans_, and others +of Schiller's plays." + +"Ah!" I replied, "that accounts for it, then. The more you read +German, the more you will like it. I think our schoolmasters and +schoolmistresses make a great mistake, generally, in the books they +select for the instruction and familiarising of their pupils with +foreign languages. They appear, really, to choose the driest authors +they can pick out! If I had anything to do with `teaching the young +idea how to shoot,' I should adopt a very different plan." + +"Dear me!" she exclaimed, laughing. "I can fancy I see you, a grim old +pedagogue, with a pair of horn-rimmed spectacles and a snuff-coloured +coat! What would be your new system, Mr Professor?" + +"Well," said I, "in the first place, I should not dream of putting books +like Schiller's dramas into their hands, as is the ordinary course, +before they were able to translate pretty fluently, gathering the sense +of what they read without the aid of a dictionary. I say nothing +against the masterpieces of the great German classic. I like Schiller, +myself. But, what boy or girl can appreciate the poetry of his +descriptions, and the grandeur of his verse, when every second word they +meet with is a stumbling-block, that has to be sought out diligently in +the lexicon ere they can understand the context? Instead of this +inculcating a love for what they read, it breeds disgust. Even now, I +confess, I cannot take an interest in _William Tell_, just because he, +and his fellow Switzers, of Uri and elsewhere, will always be associated +in my mind with so many lines of translation and repetition that I had +to learn by heart at school." + +"But, what would you give your pupils to study in lieu of such works?" +she asked. + +"Vividly interesting stories--novels, if you like--in the language they +had to learn. Not short pieces, or `elegant extracts;' but, good, long +tales of thrilling adventure and well worked-up plots, whose interest, +and the desire to know what was coming next, would make them read on and +stammer out the sense, until they reached the denouement. And, if it +should be objected that German and French novels are not exactly what +you would place before young children for study, I would retort, that, +the majority of the works of our best authors are now translated into +both those languages almost as soon as they are published over here; let +them read those! However, you were saying that you did not think German +poetry pleasing or euphonious?" + +"No," she said, "I do not; although, it may be owing to what you have +remarked, that school study has given me a distaste for it. Still, you +have now made me wish that I knew more of it. I think I will take it up +again; and, perhaps, Mr Professor, under your tuition, I may learn +better to like it." + +"I should be only too glad, Min," I said, "to unfold its beauties to +you; but, I'm the worst teacher in the world, and too impatient of +blunders. Yet, I don't think I could be a very hard master to _you_" I +added, lowering my voice to a whisper. + +"Couldn't you?" she said. "I don't know about that, Master Frank! I +well remember a particular evening, and my birthday party; and how a +certain gentleman--whom I won't name--behaved then and since." + +"Oh! Haven't you forgiven me yet, Min?" I exclaimed. "I thought--" + +"Don't mind about that," she said, hurriedly.--"Go on with what you were +telling me concerning German; the others will hear you! Do you think +the language soft?" + +"I can't say exactly that it _is_ as soft as our own," I proceeded to +say, for the benefit of Miss Spight, who appeared to be listening to our +conversation.--"But, a good many people, who call the Teuton tongue +uncouth, seem to forget its close resemblance both in style and +expression, to English. Either language can be rendered in the +vernacular of the other, without losing its force or even sound; and +that is more than can be said for French or Italian. Shakspeare, for +instance, in German, is almost equally as telling and forcible as +Shakspeare in English; while, in French--Bah! you should just hear it as +_once_ I heard it, and you would laugh! Indeed, if we are strictly +logical on the point of the euphony of language, the Italian dialect, +which we deem so soft and liquid, sounds quite harsh, I'm told, in +comparison with the labial syllables that the Polynesian islanders use +in the South Seas." + +We then relapsed into silence again, Min still leaning over the side of +the boat and dipping her fingers in the limpid, silvery water, which +sparkled with gem-like coruscations of light as she stirred it to and +fro. + +At Mortlake she splashed a shower of sprinkling pearls over an irate +swan pater-familias, who had hurried out from the alders, to see what +business we meant by coming at that time of night so near the domain of +Mrs Swan and her cygnet progeny. We were both much amused at the +fierce air with which he advanced, as if to eat us all up; and then, his +precipitate retreat, on getting wetted so unceremoniously. He turned +tail at once; and, propelling himself away with vigorous strokes of his +webbed sculls, made the water foam from his prow-like curving neck, +leaving a broad wake behind him of glistening sheen. + +"What a nice day we have had," said Min, presently. "All has gone off +so well, without a hitch. We have had such a nice talk, too. Why is +it, I wonder," she continued, musingly, "that ordinary conversation is +generally so empty and silly? Gentlemen appear to believe that ladies +know nothing but about balls, and dancing, and the weather, and croquet! +I do not mean, when we are all talking together, as to-day; but, when +one is alone with them, and not one of a circle of talkers, they never +say anything of any depth and reflection. Perhaps, when I go out, it is +my fate to meet with exceptional partners at parties. But, I declare, +they never utter a sensible remark! I suppose they think me very +stupid, and not worth the trouble of seriously conversing to. Really, I +imagine that gentlemen believe all girls to belong to an inferior order +of intellect; and fancy that it is necessary for them to descend from +their god-like level, in order to talk to them about such senseless +trivialities as they think suited to their age and sex!" + +"Perhaps it is not all the fault of the men," said I. "They are +probably bashful, as most of us are." + +"Bashful?" she replied; "I like that, Master Frank. Why, you are all a +most intolerable set of conceited mortals! No, it is not that:--it is, +because the `lords of creation' think us beneath the notice of their +superior minds."--And she tossed her little head proudly. + +"Well, then," I said, "your duty is to draw us out. Many men are +diffident of speaking earnestly and showing their feelings, from the +fear of being laughed at, or ridiculed, as solemn prigs and book-worms. +Ladies should think of this, and encourage us." + +"Yet, some of you," she replied, undauntedly, "are not so reticent and +retiring. There is Mr Mawley, for instance. He always talks to me +about literature and art, and politics, too--although I do not care much +about _them_--just as if I were a man like himself, and blessed with the +same understanding!" + +"Oh," said I, "the curate is usually fond of hearing himself talk!" + +"You need not abuse poor Mr Mawley," she said, laughing. "`Those who +live in glass houses,' you know, `should not throw stones!' _You_ are, +also, not averse to airing your opinions, Master Frank! But, don't get +angry--" she continued, as I slightly withdrew from her side, in +momentary pique at hearing the curate's part taken.--"I like to hear you +talk of such things, Frank, far better than if you only spoke to me of +commonplace matters, as most gentlemen do, or dosed me with flattery, +which I detest!" + +"I do not talk so to _everybody_,"--I said, meaningly, coming closer to +her again and taking one of her hands captive.--"Do you know why I like +to let you know my deeper thoughts, Min, and learn more of my inner +nature than others?" I whispered, bending over her. + +"N-o!" she said, faintly, turning away her head. + +"Because, Min--" I said, hesitatingly, almost abashed at my own +rashness--"because, I--I--love you!" + +She said nothing in reply; but she bent her head lower, so that I could +not see her face; and, the little hand I held, trembled in my grasp. + +At this point, too, our conversation was interrupted by the vicar asking +Bessie Dasher and her sister to start the "Canadian Boat Song," in which +we all joined in harmony:--the music, borne far and wide over the +expanse of resonant water, sounding like some fairy chorus of yellow- +haired sea-maidens, singing fathoms deep below in ocean caves! + +When I was seeing her home, however, after we had all arrived at the +vicarage, and separated severally with a cheerful "good-night," I was +able to prosecute my wooing. + +We were walking along side by side--she declined taking my arm, being +shy, and quite unlike the frank, straightforward Min whom I had before +known. I was not downhearted at this change, though:--I really felt +shy, and nervous, myself! + +As soon as we had got a safe distance from the others, and there was no +fear of being overheard in the stillness of the night, I again spoke to +her. + +"Min," I said, "do you remember what I said to you just now when we were +on the river?" + +She made no answer; but, quickening her steps, walked on hurriedly, I +still keeping pace by her side. + +"Min, my darling," I said once more, "I love you dearer than life. +Won't you try to like me a little in return? Won't you listen to me? +Won't you hear me?" + +"O-oh, Frank!" she exclaimed. + +"Ever since I first saw you in church, so many long months ago, Min, I +have thought of you, dreamt of you, loved you!"--I proceeded, +passionately.--"O, my darling! my darling! won't you try and like me a +little; or, have I been deceived in thinking that you could care for +me?" + +"I _do_ like you, Frank," she said, softly, laying her little hand on my +arm. + +I seized it in transport, and put it within my arm proudly. + +"Sweet!" I said, "_liking_ alone will not do for me! You must learn to +love me, darling, as I love you! Will it be very hard?" + +"I don't know, Frank, I can try," she said, demurely; looking up at me +with her deep, grey eyes, which, now suffused with a tender love-light, +had a greater charm for me than ever. + +I felt as if I were walking on air! + +After a little pause, during which we both walked on slowly, I too happy +to speak, Min squeezed my arm. + +"Do you then love me so _very_ much, Frank?" she said; and, there was a +wistful look in her eyes, an earnest pathos in her voice, that touched +me to the heart. + +"Love you, Min? I adore you! I dote on you! I worship the very ground +you walk on; and, if you were cruel to me, I think I would die to- +morrow!" + +"Poor fellow!" she said, pressing closer to my side. + +"O, Min,"--I went on,--"if you only knew the agony I have suffered in +thinking that you cared for some one else! I love you so much, that I +am jealous of every word you speak, every glance of your darling eyes +which is not directed to me. I envied my very dog the other day because +you caressed him!" + +"What!" she exclaimed, "Jealous of poor Catch! Do you know, Frank, that +made me ove you first, your fondness for your dog and little Dicky +Chips!" + +"You _do_ love me, then? O, Min, my darling!" I exclaimed in ecstasy. + +"I didn't say so, did I?" she said, saucily. "Well, then," I entreated, +"say it now, sweet! Say that you love me, my darling!" + +"You are much too exacting, sir!"--she said, drawing herself up with the +air of a haughty little Empress.--"I must consider your petition first." + +"But you _do_ love me, darling; so why cannot you say it? Tell me, pet, +`Frank, I love you;' and, you'll make me happy for ever!" I pleaded. + +"I _shan't_ be ordered," she said, with a piquante coquetry which made +her appear all the more winning.--"I'm not going to tell you anything of +the kind, for I won't be dictated to; but, I'll say `I love you, Frank.' +There! sir, will that please your lordship, although it is not in the +exact words you have asked me?"--and she made a pretty little gesture of +affected disdain. + +"O Min, my love! my pet! my darling!"--said I, rapturously-- + +I stopped, breathless with emotion. I could not get out a word more! + +We had now reached her door, and she said she must go in. I persuaded +her, however, to wait a little while longer before she knocked, as I +could not say `Good-night' yet. Parting was too hard, though sweet. +So, we talked on in whispers to one another for some minutes--it may +have been hours, for all I know to the contrary--what might be to you +only a lot of uninteresting talk, but, what was heaven to me! + +"Good-night, Frank!" Min said at length. "I really must go in now, or +mamma will think me lost. And, O Frank!" she exclaimed in alarm, as the +sudden thought struck her--"what _will_ she say when she hears of this!" + +"Oh, never mind thinking of that now!" I said. "I will come round to- +morrow afternoon, sweet, and ask her whether I may be allowed to hope, +and win you for my own dear, darling little wife!" + +We were standing close together in the porch, just under the gas-light. +I was gazing into her eyes, which seemed to me ever so much brighter +than the light of the lamp above us, or the stars overhead. + +The little ear next me got quite pink. + +She quickly bent down her head in confusion. + +"You mustn't call me names, Frank!" she said. "I won't have it, sir! I +won't have it! You have no right!" + +I clasped her little hand firmly in mine. + +"This belongs to me now, darling, does it not? You _will_ be my own +darling little wife, won't you?" I repeated. + +She said nothing, but, after a moment, she raised her face to mine; and, +as I bent down my head, and looked into her very soul, through the deep, +honest, trusting, loving, grey eyes, our lips met in one long thrilling +kiss. + +It was a foretaste of paradise! + +END OF FIRST VOLUME. + + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's She and I, Volume 1, by John Conroy Hutcheson + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SHE AND I, VOLUME 1 *** + +***** This file should be named 21095.txt or 21095.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/2/1/0/9/21095/ + +Produced by Nick Hodson of London, England + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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