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diff --git a/21102.txt b/21102.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6400232 --- /dev/null +++ b/21102.txt @@ -0,0 +1,7289 @@ +Project Gutenberg's Tom and Some Other Girls, by Mrs. George de Horne Vaizey + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: Tom and Some Other Girls + A Public School Story + +Author: Mrs. George de Horne Vaizey + +Illustrator: Percy Tarrant + +Release Date: April 16, 2007 [EBook #21102] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK TOM AND SOME OTHER GIRLS *** + + + + +Produced by Nick Hodson of London, England + + + + + +Tom and some other Girls +A Public School Story + +By Mrs George de Horne Vaizey +________________________________________________________________________ +You would be mistaken if you thought this was going to be a book about +a girl called Thomasina, for it is actually about a girl call Rhoda +Chester. Rhoda has been brought up as the child of rich parents. Her +brothers have done well, but she has been kept at home, and has been +taught by governesses and other visiting tutors. The German fraulein +goes to her own home in Germany for a holiday, where she gets married +and never comes back. + +This prompts Mr Chester to consider sending Rhoda away to a boarding +school. There is a discussion, Rhoda's mother not being at all in +favour of the idea, but Rhoda is keen to go. + +They settle on a school. Rhoda goes there, and enjoys herself, doing +well. Tom and the other girls are of course her schoolmates. But there +is to be an important exam, for which Rhoda overworks, to the point +where her brain no longer works when she is in the examination hall. +So life is downward, instead of upward, she realises. We will leave +you to read the rest of the story. Vaizey is at her best again. N.H. +________________________________________________________________________ +TOM AND SOME OTHER GIRLS +A PUBLIC SCHOOL STORY + +BY MRS. GEORGE DE HORNE VAIZEY + + + +CHAPTER ONE. + +A CHANGE. + +"Yes, she must go to school!" repeated Mr Chester. + +A plaintive sob greeted his words from the neighbourhood of the sofa. +For once in her life Mrs Chester's kindly, good-tempered face had lost +its smiles, and was puckered up into lines of distress. She let one +fat, be-ringed hand drop to her side and wander restlessly over the +satin skirt in search of a pocket. Presently out came a handkerchief, +which was applied to each eye in turn, and came away bedewed with tears. + +"It will break my heart to part from her!" she faltered. Her husband +laughed with masculine scepticism. + +"Oh, nonsense, dear," he said; "hearts are not so easily broken. You +are too sensible to grieve over what is for the child's good, and will +get used to the separation, as other mothers have done before you. It +will be the making of Rhoda to leave home for a few years, to mix with +other girls, and find her level. She is getting an altogether +exaggerated idea of her own importance!" + +"Her level, indeed! Find her level! I should like to know the school +where you could find another girl like her!" cried the mother, in a tone +which showed plainly enough who was responsible for Miss Rhoda's +conceit. The tears dried on her face for very indignation, and she sat +upright in her seat, staring across the room. + +It was a gorgeous apartment, this drawing-room of Erley Chase, the +residence of Henry Chester, Esquire, and Marianne his wife; a gorgeous +room in the literal acceptance of the term, for each separate article of +furniture looked as if it had been chosen more from the fact of its +intrinsic value than for its usefulness or beauty. + +Mr Chester, the son of a country clergyman, had considered himself +passing rich when a manufacturer uncle took him into his employ, at a +salary of L400 a year. The first thing he did after this position was +assured was to marry his old love, the daughter of the village doctor, +with whom he had played since childhood; and the young couple spent the +first dozen years of their married lives very happily and contentedly in +a little house in a smoky manufacturing town. The bachelor uncle was +proud of his clever nephew and fond of the cheery little wife, who was +always kind and thoughtful even when gout and a naturally irritable +temper goaded him into conduct the reverse of amiable. When Harold was +born, and christened after himself, he presented the child with a silver +mug, and remarked that he hoped he would turn out better than most young +men, and not break his parents' hearts as a return for their goodness. +When Jim followed, the mug was not forthcoming; but when little Rhoda +made her appearance six years later he gave her a rattle, and trusted +that she would improve in looks as she grew older, since he never +remembered seeing an uglier baby. He was certainly neither a gracious +nor a liberal old gentleman, but the young couple were blessed with +contented minds and moderate ambitions, so they laughed good-naturedly +at his crusty speeches, and considered themselves rich, inasmuch as they +were able to pay their way and were spared anxiety for the future. And +then an extraordinary thing happened! The old man died suddenly, and +left to his beloved nephew a fortune which, even in these days of +millionaires, might truthfully be called enormous. Henry Chester could +not believe the lawyers when the amount of his new wealth was broken to +him, for his uncle had lived so unostentatiously that he had had no idea +of the magnitude of his savings. The little wife, who had never known +what it was to spend sixpence carelessly in all her thirty-five years, +grew quite hysterical with excitement when an arithmetical calculation +proved to her the daily riches at her disposal; but she recovered her +composure with wonderful celerity, and expressed her intention of +enjoying the goods which the gods had sent her. No poking in gloomy +town houses after this! No hoarding of riches as the poor old uncle had +done, while denying himself the common comforts of life! She herself +had been economical from a sense of duty only, for her instincts were +all for lavishness and generosity--and now, now! Did not Henry feel it +a provision of Providence that Erley Chase was empty, and, as it were, +waiting for their occupation? + +Her husband gasped at the audacity of the idea. Erley Chase! the finest +place around, one of the largest properties in the county, and Marianne +suggested that he should take it! that he should remove from his fifty- +pound house into that stately old pile! The suggestion appalled him, +and yet why not? His lawyer assured him that he could afford it; his +children were growing up, and he had their future to consider. He +thought of his handsome boys, his curly-headed girl, and decided proudly +that nothing was too good for them; he looked into the future, and saw +his children's children reigning in his stead, and the name of Chester +honoured in the land. So Erley Chase was bought, and little Mrs +Chester furnished it, as we have seen, to her own great contentment and +that of the tradespeople with whom she dealt; and in the course of a few +months the family moved into their new abode. + +At first the country people were inclined to look coldly on the new- +comers, but it was impossible to keep up an unfriendly attitude towards +Mr and Mrs Chester. They were utterly free from affectation, and, so +far from apeing that indifference to wealth adopted by most _nouveaux +riches_, were so frankly, transparently enchanted with their new +possessions that they were more like a couple of children with a new toy +than a steady-going, middle-aged couple. They won first respect, and +then affection, and were felt to be a decided acquisition to the well- +being of the neighbourhood, since they were never appealed to in vain in +the cause of charity. + +In the days of her own short means, when she had been obliged to look +helplessly at the trials of her neighbours, Mrs Chester had solaced +herself by dreaming of what she would do if she had money and to spare, +and to her credit be it said, she did not forget to put those dreams +into execution when the opportunity arose. The days are past when fairy +godmothers flash suddenly before our raptured eyes, clad in spangled +robes, with real, true wings growing out of their shoulders, but the +race is not dead; they appear sometimes as stout little women, in satin +gowns and be-feathered bonnets, and with the most prosaic of red, +beaming faces. The Chester barouche was not manufactured out of a +pumpkin, nor drawn by rats, but none the less had it spirited away many +a Cinderella to the longed-for ball, and, when the Prince was found, the +fairy godmother saw to it that there was no lack of satin gowns, or +glassy slippers. Dick Whittingtons, too, sitting friendless by the +roadside, were helped on to fortune; and the Sleeping Beauty was rescued +from her dull little home, and taken about to see the world. It is +wonderful what fairy deeds can be accomplished by a kind heart and a +full purse, and the recipients of Mrs Chester's bounty were relieved +from undue weight of obligation by the transparent evidence that her +enjoyment was even greater than their own! + +Harold went to Eton and Oxford, and Jim to Sandhurst; but Rhoda stayed +at home and ruled supreme over her mother, her governesses, and the +servants of the establishment. Her great-uncle's wish had been +fulfilled, inasmuch as she grew up tall and straight, with a mane of +reddish-gold hair and more than an average share of good looks. She was +clever, too, and generous enough to have acknowledged her faults if it +had for one moment occurred to her that she possessed any; which it had +not. It was one of Mrs Chester's articles of faith that her daughter +was the most beautiful, the most gifted, and the most perfect of created +beings, and Rhoda agreeably acquiesced in the decision, and was pitiful +of other girls who were not as herself. Every morning when she had not +a headache, and did not feel "floppy" or "nervey," she did lessons with +Fraulein, who adored her, and shed tears behind her spectacles when +obliged to point out a fault. Then the two would repair together to the +tennis courts and play a set, the pupil winning by six games to love; or +go a bicycle ride, when Rhoda would practise fancy figures, while her +good, but cumbersome, companion picked herself up from recumbent +positions on the sidewalk, and shook the dust from her garments. At +other times Rhoda would put on her riding habit and go a ride round the +estate, taking care to emerge from the west gate at the moment when the +village children were returning from school. The little girls would +"bob" in old-fashioned style, and the boys would pull off their caps, +and Rhoda would toss her flaxen mane and acknowledge their salutations +with a gracious smile and a wave of the little gloved hand. The +children thought she looked like a fairy princess, and no more dreamt +that she was of the same flesh and blood as themselves than did Miss +Rhoda herself. Then came lunch, and more often than not some excuse for +getting off the hour's lessons with Fraulein before the "visiting +professors" arrived. Music master, drawing master, French master--they +each came in their turn, and Rhoda exerted herself to do her best, as +she invariably did, given the stimulus of an audience, and was praised +and flattered to her heart's desire. It was a happy life, and most +satisfactory from the girl's point of view; so that it seemed most +annoying that it should be interrupted, and by Fraulein too, who had +always been so meek and tractable! Who could have imagined when she +went home for the summer holidays that an old love would appear and +insist upon marrying her out of hand? + +"But what am _I_ to do?" cried Rhoda, when the news was first received; +and then, in stern disapproval, "I'm _surprised_ at Fraulein! At her +age she should know better. She always professed to be so devoted. I +can't understand how she could make up her mind to leave me." + +"It must have been a terrible trial to her, dearest," said Mrs Chester +soothingly, and she meant what she said. How could any one prefer a +fat, long-haired, spectacled lover (all Germans were fat, long-haired, +and spectacled!) to her beautiful, clever daughter? She sighed, once +for Rhoda's disappointment, and once again, and with an added stab, for +herself. + +Several times lately Mr Chester had hinted that Rhoda was getting too +much for Fraulein, and should be sent to school, while Harold had +treacherously seconded his father with remarks of such brotherly candour +as made his mother hot with indignation. Jim was mercifully away from +home, but even so it was two against one, and she instinctively felt +that Fraulein's defection would be seized upon by the enemy and the +attack pressed home upon the first opportunity. And now it had come, +and there sat the poor, dear soul, shedding tears of anguish on her +lace-edged handkerchief, as she vainly tried to oppose the inevitable. + +"I cannot, and will not, part from my child!" + +"Nonsense, mother, you parted from me, and I shall take it as a personal +insult if you insinuate that you would feel Rhoda's absence more than +you did mine. Remember how delighted you were when I came back! +Remember the holidays, how happy you were, how interested in all I had +to tell!" + +Harold Chester crossed the room, and laid his hand on his mother's +shoulder with a kindly gesture. He looked as if he were made on the +same principle as the other objects of _vertu_ in the room, and if Mrs +Chester had desired to possess "the most superfine specimen of sons and +heirs," she had certainly got her wish, so far as appearances were +concerned. Harold was tall and fair, with aquiline features and a manly +carriage. His hair would have curled if it had not been cropped so +close to his head; his clothes were of immaculate cut. At twenty-five +he was known as one of the most daring sportsmen in the county, and if +he had not distinguished himself at college, he had, at least, scrambled +through with the crowd. His mother declared with pride that he had +never given her an hour's anxiety since he had had the measles, and +thanked Heaven for her mercies every time she saw him ride off to the +hunt in his beautiful pink coat. Harold was her first-born darling, but +Rhoda was the baby, and she could not bring herself to believe that her +baby was growing up. + +"The child will fret and break her heart. I don't care about myself, +but I will not have her made unhappy. She has such a sensitive heart!" +She sobbed as she spoke, and Harold laughed. + +"You trust me, mater; Rhoda is as well able to take care of herself as +any girl can be. You will regret it all your life long if you keep her +at home now. School is what she needs, and school she must have, if she +is to make a woman worth having. She is a jolly little soul, and I'm +proud of her; but her eyes are so taken up admiring Miss Rhoda Chester +that she has no attention left for anything else. Let her go, mother, +and find out that there are other girls in the world beside herself!" + +"But the other girls will b-b-bully her. They will make fun of her and +laugh at her little ways--" + +"And a good--" Harold checked himself and said cheerily: "Rhoda won't +let herself be bullied without knowing the reason why, mother. Whatever +faults she may have, no one can accuse her of lack of spirit. I believe +she would like to go. She has very few girl friends, and would enjoy +the new experience." + +"We will tell her about it, and see what she says," said Mr Chester; +and at that very moment the door opened and Rhoda walked into the room. + + + +CHAPTER TWO. + +WHAT RHODA THOUGHT. + +Father, mother, and brother looked at Rhoda, and felt a pardonable pride +in her appearance. Her white evening frock showed off the fair +complexion and golden locks, and she carried herself with an erect, +fearless mien which made a pleasant contrast to the stooping backs and +shambling gait of most growing girls. If she were not regularly pretty, +her air of assurance forced onlookers to think her so, despite their +better judgment, and there was about her a breezy atmosphere of health +and youth. She looked from one to the other of the watching faces, and +smiled in a good-humoured, tolerant manner, which showed a dimple in the +round cheek. + +"Hatching mischief!" she cried, nodding her head sagely. "The way in +which your voices ceased as I entered the room was highly suspicious. +Never mind--I'll go to bed soon, and then you can talk at your ease. It +_is_ awkward when birthdays are drawing near! ... Chain bracelets are +very nice, with turquoises set here and there, and I rather like that +new edition of Shakespeare with a lot of dear little books fitted into a +case. I don't object to brooches either, or ornaments for my room--" + +"But, strange to say, we were not thinking of giving you anything! We +were talking of a much more serious consideration than a birthday. We +were talking of your Future Education," said Mr Chester, solemnly. He +spoke so impressively, and with such very large capitals to the last two +words, that Rhoda was startled into attention, and turned her eyes upon +him in wonder. + +"My--future--education? Why, what do you--what am I going to do?" + +"We have been considering the advisability of sending you to school. +You are nearly sixteen, and have been educated at home all your life, +and now that Fraulein cannot return I feel strongly that it would be for +your good to spend a couple of years at school among girls of your own +age. Your mother naturally dreads the parting, and fears that you would +be unhappy, but Harold thinks that you would enjoy the experience. What +is your own impression? Do you dislike the idea, or feel inclined +towards it?" + +Rhoda meditated, and her mother watched her with wistful eyes. At the +first mention of the word "school" the girl had started with surprise, +and her eyes had looked wide and puzzled, but now as she stood +deliberating, it was not dismay, but rather pleasure and excitement, +that showed in her face. The eyes gleamed complacently, the dimple +dipped, the fair head tilted itself, and Rhoda said slowly-- + +"I think I should--_like_ it! It would be a--change!" + +Alas for Mrs Chester, and alas for every mother in that sharp moment +when she realises that the nestling which she has been keeping so safe +and warm is already beginning to find the nest too narrow for its +ambitions, and is longing to fly away into the big, wide world! Two +salt tears splashed on to the satin gown, but no one saw them, for the +girl was engrossed in her own feelings, while Mr Chester was saying +brightly-- + +"That's my brave girl! I knew you would be no coward." + +Harold watched his sister with mingled pity and amusement. + +"They'll take it out of her! They'll take it out of her! Poor little +Ro! Won't she hate it, and won't it do her good!" he said to himself, +shrewdly. "And, after the first, I shouldn't wonder if she became a +prime favourite!" + +Rhoda seated herself on a crimson plush chair, and folded her hands on +her knees, in an attitude of expectation. She was an impetuous young +person, and could brook no delay when once her interest was aroused. +School having been mentioned as a possibility of the future, it became +imperative to settle the matter off-hand. + +Which school? When? Who would take her? What would she have to buy? +What were the rules? When were the holidays? How long would they be? +Where would she spend them?--One question succeeded another in +breathless succession, making Mr Chester smile with indulgent +amusement. + +"My dear child, how can I tell? So far it is only a suggestion. +Nothing is settled. We have not even thought of one school before +another--" + +"If she goes at all, I should like her to go to Miss Moorby's, at +Bournemouth," said Mrs Chester quickly. "She only takes ten girls, and +I'm told it is just like a home--hot bottles in all the beds, and beef- +tea at eleven--" + +"Mother!" cried Rhoda, in a tone of deep reproach. Her eyes flashed, +and she drew herself up proudly. "No, indeed! If I go at all, I will +do the thing properly, and go to a real school, and not a hot-house. I +don't want their old beef-tea and bottles. I want to go to a nice, big, +sporty school, where they treat you like boys, and not young ladies, and +put you on your honour, and don't bind you down by a hundred sickening +little rules. I want to go to,"--she drew a long breath, and glanced at +her mother, as if bracing herself to meet opposition--"to Hurst Manor! +There! I've read about it in magazines, and Ella Mason had a cousin who +had been there, and she said it was--simply mag.! She was Head Girl, +and ruled the house, and came out first in the games, and she said she +never had such sport in her life, and found the holidays quite fearfully +flat and stale in comparison." + +"You don't become Head Girl all at once," interposed Harold, drily; +while Mrs Chester gave another sob at the idea that home could ever be +looked upon in so sad a light. + +"Hurst Manor?" she repeated vaguely. "That's a strange name. I never +heard of the place before. What do you know about it that makes you +want to go, darling? Are you quite sure it is nice, and what is the +Head Mistress like, and how many young la-- girls does she take? Not +too many, I hope, for I can't see how they can be properly looked after +when there are more than twenty or thirty. I've heard terrible stories +of delicacy for life arising from neglect. You remember poor, dear Evie +Vane! Her glands swelled, and nobody noticed, and--" + +"My glands never swell. They know better. Over two hundred girls, +mother; but they are divided into different houses, with a staff of +teachers in charge of each, so there's no fear of being neglected; and +it's much more fun living in a crowd. I'm tired of talking to the same +people over and over again, and should love a variety. Among the +hundred girls, one would be sure to find one or two whom one could +really like." + +Harold laughed again, a sleepy laugh, which brought a flash into his +sister's eyes. That was the worst of Harold; he was so superior! He +never argued, nor contradicted, but he had a way of smiling to himself, +of throwing back his head and half shutting his eyes, which made Rhoda +feel as if throwing cushions at him would be the only adequate relief to +her feelings. She glared at him for a moment, and then turned her back +on him in a marked manner and addressed herself to her father. + +"You will write to Miss Bruce at once, won't you, father, and arrange +for me to go at the beginning of the term?" + +"I will write for particulars, or, better still, your mother and I will +go down to see the place for ourselves. I should like you to go to the +school you fancy, if it can be arranged, and I suppose this is as good +as any." + +"Better!" Rhoda declared rapturously, "a thousand times better! Ella +Mason said so; and she knows, because her cousin's sisters have all been +at different schools--one at Cheltenham, one at Saint Andrew's, one at +Wycombe, and she declares that Hurst beats them all. It must be so, +since it has adopted all the good ideas and abandoned the bad." She +went on with a rambling statement which seemed to imply that Miss Bruce +had been in turn sole proprietor of each of these well-known schools +before abandoning them in favour of her new establishment; that Hurst +Manor buildings had been recently erected, at vast expense, to provide +every possible convenience for the pupils, and at the same time was a +nobleman's seat of venerable interest; that sports and games formed the +chief interest of the pupils, lessons being relegated to an appropriate +secondary position; while, astonishing to relate, the honours in all +University examinations fell to "Hurst girls," and every woman who had +made a name for herself had graduated from its ranks! She detailed +these interesting items of information with sublime assurance; and, when +Harold mildly pointed out inconsistencies, retorted scornfully that she +supposed she might be allowed to know, since Ella's cousin had _said_ +so, and she had been there, and seen for herself! Mrs Chester +supported her by murmurs of assent, and little warning frowns to her +son, which in dumb language signified that he was to be a good boy, and +not aggravate his sister; and Mr Chester put his arm round her waist, +and looked down at her, half smiling, half pitiful. The pitiful +expression grew, and became so marked that the girl gazed at him in +surprise. Why did he look so sorry? Was he already feeling the blank +which her absence would leave? Did he fear that she would be home-sick, +and regret her hasty decision? She stared into his face with her bright +blue eyes, and her father gazed back, noting the firm chin, the arched +brows, the characteristic tilt of the head. This overweening confidence +of youth--he was asking himself earnestly--was it altogether a +misfortune, or but raw material out of which great things were to be +made in the future? Was it not better to go forth to meet life's battle +with a light heart and fearless tread than trembling and full of doubt? +Surely it was better, and yet his heart was sore for the girl, as the +heart of a leader must be sore when he sends his soldiers to the front, +knowing that no victory is won without a cost, no fight without a scar. +Something very like a tear glittered in the father's eye, and at the +sight Rhoda's face softened into a charming tenderness. She snuggled +her head into his neck, and rubbed her soft cheeks against his, +murmuring absurd little sentences of endearment, as to a child of two +years old. + +"Whose pet is it, then? Whose own precious? The nicest old sweet in +the world." + +Mr Chester pushed the girl aside, and put on a frown of portentous +ferocity to conceal the delight with which her demonstration had, in +reality, filled him. He loved to feel the sweep of the crisp locks, the +touch of the soft cheek; he even appreciated, if the truth must be told, +being addressed as a "precious," but wild horses would not have induced +him to confess as much, and he made haste to leave the room with Harold +lest perchance any sign of his real feelings might betray themselves to +the sharp feminine eye. + +Left alone with her mother, Rhoda clasped her hands behind her back, and +paced slowly up and down. It was a relief, after all, to be rid of the +men, and be able to talk things over with a feminine hearer who never +brought forward inconvenient quibbles, who accepted statements as facts, +as of course they were, and agreed to propositions in a quiet, +reasonable manner. Rhoda thought out several important matters in that +march to and fro, and announced the result in a decisive manner. + +"I must have a complete new outfit! I don't believe in taking half-worn +things. You can send them away to that poor clergyman in Ireland, with +the five daughters. Geraldine, isn't it, who `fits' my clothes? Well, +Geraldine shall have my blue silk, and the fawn jacket, and the blouses, +and the grey dress. If the arm-holes stick into her as much as they do +into me, she will wish I had never been invented. She can have my best +hat, too, if she wants it. I hate it, and at `Hurst' you never wear +anything but sailors', with the school colours. There is a blue house, +and a pink, and a green, and a yellow, and a red; that's the way they +arrange in all big schools, and I only hope and pray it won't be my fate +to be yellow, or _what_ an image I'll look! Other things being equal, +Mum dear, kindly say you think the blue house would be best for my +health and morals. I want to live _in_, you understand, not _out_-- +that's one point I have quite decided." + +"In what, dearest? Out of what? I don't understand what you mean." + +"In school itself. There are three houses in the school building and +three in the grounds, and, of course, if you live `out' you have ten +minutes' walk over to classes, whatever the weather may be. I should +object to shivering across the first thing in the morning in rain and +snow and getting all splashed and blown. No one can call me a coddle, +but I _do_ like comfort, and it would be a dreadful fag--" + +"I should think so, indeed; most risky! I wouldn't hear of it for you. +If you go at all you must live in, and have a comfortable room, with a +fire in cold weather." + +"Oh, well; I don't know if you can expect that. We mustn't be too +exacting. You will look after my clothes at once, mother, won't you? +for there will be so much to get. I want things nice, you know! I +should like the girls to see that I had decent belongings. I love +having all the _little_ things complete and dainty. I think girls ought +to be particular about them. It's a sign of refinement. I can't endure +shabby things round me." + +"Of course not, darling; and there's no reason why you should. Write +down a list of what you want, so that we shan't forget anything when we +are in town. You shall have all you need; but, oh! dear me, I don't +know how shall I live when you have gone. I shall break my heart +without you!" And Mrs Chester's tears once more rolled down her +cheeks. It seemed to her at this moment that the greatest trouble which +her happy life had known was this projected parting from her beloved +daughter. + + + +CHAPTER THREE. + +ANTICIPATIONS. + +Two days later Mr and Mrs Chester started on their tour of inspection, +and Rhoda reflected that she could not employ herself better during +their absence than by preparing, so far as might be, for the life ahead. +She went upstairs to her own sitting-room, and made a sweeping survey +of her treasures. The books in the hanging cases must, of course, be +left behind, since they were too numerous to carry. She looked lovingly +at their bright gold and leather backs, and took down a special +favourite here and there, to dip into its contents. The Waverley novels +ran in a long, yellow line across one shelf; Dickens, clad in red, came +immediately beneath; and a whole row of poets on the bottom shelf. +Wordsworth was a prize from Fraulein, but his pages were still stiff and +unread; Longfellow opened of himself at "Hiawatha"; while Tennyson, most +beloved of all, held half a dozen markers at favourite passages. His +portrait hung close at hand, a copy of that wonderful portrait by Watts, +which seems to have immortalised all the power and beauty of the +strange, sad face. Rhoda nicked a grain of dust from the glass surface, +and carefully straightened the frame against the wall, for this picture +was one of her greatest treasures, and respected accordingly. Another +case held books of stories, ranging from the fairy tales of childhood to +the publications of last year; a third was devoted to bound volumes of +magazines, and a fourth to the less showy and interesting school-books. + +"It's no use taking _you_!" said Rhoda scornfully. "I expect you are +quite out of date. You can stay here and rest, and when I come back +I'll point out your errors, and send you into the lumber-room to make +room for the new ones!" Then she turned her attention to the +mantelpiece, on which reposed a quite extraordinary number of miniature +jugs. Jugs, jugs everywhere, and nothing but jugs; blue jugs, yellow +jugs, brown jugs, red jugs; Worcester jugs with delicate white figures +against a background of blue; jugs worth a penny sterling at the village +emporium; plain jugs, iridescent jugs; jugs with one handle, with two, +with three, with none at all. Their variety was as puzzling as their +number, but Rhoda gazed at them with all the pride of the collector. +"Jugs"--unrivalled by postcards, stamps, or crests--had been her mania +for a year on end, and the result was dear to her heart. To find a new +jug to add to the collection had appeared one of the chief objects in +travelling; an expedition to town had been a failure or success, +according as it discovered jugs or no jugs. + +In her anxiety for their safety she had even volunteered to dust her own +mantelpiece, and now, alas! she must leave them to the tender mercies of +Mary and her assistants! It was a painful reflection, and after a +moment's consideration she determined not to risk it, but to store the +darlings away in some safe hiding-place until her return. + +No sooner said than done. Each little jug was wrapped in a separate +roll of tissue paper, fitted into a drawer of the writing-table, and +securely locked against invasion. The process of "putting away" thus +begun extended itself indefinitely. The photographs in their various +frames must be arranged and divided; nice relations and very dearest +friends, to be taken to school, disagreeable or "middling" relations, +and merely "dearest friends," to be laid aside in another drawer; +fragile ornaments to be hidden, in case they were broken; silver and +brass in case they tarnished; letters to be destroyed, to be tied up in +packets, to be answered before leaving home; pieces of fancy work to be +folded away, in case sacrilegious hands should dare to put them to any +other use than that for which they were intended. + +Rhoda set to work with the energy of ten women, and worked away until +the once tidy room had become a scene of wildest confusion; until sofa, +table, and chairs were alike piled high with bundles. Then of a sudden +her energy flagged, she grew tired and discouraged, and wished she had +left the stupid old things where she had found them. It occurred to her +as a brilliant inspiration that there was no possible hurry, and that +sitting under the trees reading a book, and drinking lemon squash, was a +much more agreeable method of spending a hot summer's day than working +like a charwoman. She carried her latest book into the garden +forthwith, ordered the "squash," and spent an hour of contented idleness +before lunch. + +The story, however, was not interesting enough to tempt a second reading +during the afternoon, for the heroine was a girl of unimpeachable +character, who pursued her studies at home under the charge of a daily +governess, and such a poor-spirited creature could hardly be expected to +commend herself to a girl who had decided for two whole days to go to +the newest of all new schools, and already felt herself far removed from +such narrow experiences. Rhoda cast about in her mind for the next +diversion, and decided to bicycle across the park to call upon the +Vicar's daughter the self-same Ella Mason who had been her informant on +so many important points. Ella would be indeed overcome to hear that +Rhoda herself was to be a "Hurst" girl, and there would be an increased +interest in hearing afresh those odd pieces of information which had +fallen from the cousin's lips. + +She felt a thrill of relief on hearing that her friend was at home, and +in finding her alone in the morning-room, which looked so bare and +colourless to eyes accustomed to the splendours of the Chase. Something +of the same contrast existed between the two girls themselves, for while +Rhoda sat glowing pink and white after her ride, Ella's cheeks were as +pale as her dress, and her eyes almost as colourless as the washed-out +ribbon round her waist. She was not a beauty by any means, but +unaffectedly loving and unselfish, rejoicing in her friend's news, +though it would deprive her of a favourite companion, and she was all +anxiety to help and encourage. She knitted her brow to remember all +that the cousin had said of Hurst Manor, wishing only that she had +listened with more attention to those pearls of wisdom. + +"Yes, she said that they did a great deal of Latin. All the girls learn +it, and it seems to be looked on as one of the most important subjects. +They translate Horace and Livy and all kinds of learned books." + +"Humph! I shan't!" declared Rhoda coolly. "I don't approve of Latin +for girls. It's silly. Of course, if you intend to teach, or be a +doctor, or anything like that, it may be useful, but for ordinary stop- +at-home girls it's nonsense. What use would Latin be to _me_, I should +like to know? I shall take modern languages instead. I can read and +write French fluently, though it doesn't come quite so easy to speak it, +and German, of course, is second nature after jabbering with Fraulein +all these years. I should _think_ in German if I would allow myself, +but I won't. I don't think it is patriotic. There is not very much +that any one can teach me of French or German!" + +"Then what is the use of studying them any more?" inquired Ella, aptly +enough; but Rhoda was not a whit discomposed. + +"My dear, it is ever so much pleasanter doing things that you +understand! The first stages are such a grind. Well, what next? What +other subjects are important?" + +"Mathematics. Some of the girls are awfully clever, and are ever so far +on in Euclid. I did one book with father; but it worried me so, and I +cried so much one day when he altered the letters and put the whole +thing out, that he grew tired, and said I could give it up. You didn't +do any with Fraulein, I think?" + +"No; it's a nuisance. I wish I did now; but I'll have to begin at once, +that's all! I'll get Harold's old books and cram up before I go, so +that I can just bring in an expression now and then, as if I knew all +about it. Girls are so patronising if they think you are a beginner... +I'm pretty well up in history, and can say reams of poetry, and play, +and draw, and paint in water colours--" + +"Ye-es!" assented Ella feebly. She was afraid to say so much in words, +but her conviction was that her friend's methods of work would seem +strangely antiquated when contrasted with the vivid strength of the new +_regime_. She recalled Rhoda's mild copies of village scenes, with +cottages in the foreground, trees to the rear, and a well-regulated +flight of swallows on the sky line, and mentally placed them beside her +cousin's vigorous sketches on the Slade system, where two or three lines +seemed to do the work of a dozen, and prettiness was a thing abhorred! +She remembered the lessons in theory and harmony, and trembled for her +friend's awakening. "Yes," she repeated. "Oh, of course; and then +there are other things besides lessons--a girl can make herself popular +by being pleasant and obliging, and the outdoor life is so fascinating. +Games every day, just as if you were boys, and each one trying to get +into a higher team, and as keen and enthusiastic as she can be. You +_will_ enjoy the games, Rhoda!" + +"Now that's just one thing I wanted to talk to you about!" cried Rhoda +earnestly. "I'm glad you reminded me. Of course, tennis and croquet +are all right. I can play a _very_ good set, and beat most ladies at +croquet. One time this summer I made five hoops in one turn, and took +my partner with me, but of course I don't do that _every_ day of the +week. I'm all right for summer games, but winter is coming on, and I +shall have to play that horrid old hockey, and I haven't the remotest +idea how it is done. I've never seen a match, but you have, and I want +you to tell me all about it, so that I may know what to do, and not make +an idiot of myself. You went to the Betham ground when you were staying +there, and saw the girls' team play. Go on! Describe it! Tell me all +about it, and everything they did!" + +Ella drew a deep breath, and looked awed and important. + +"Well! it was a county match, and one team wore white blouses and the +other pink. They had on blue skirts, very short, and awful feet! Some +had great pads on each ankle, and some had leggings, and some had +nothing at all. I should have swathings of cotton wool a foot wide, for +it made my ankles ache just to see the sticks swinging about! It was an +icy day; the wind went through us like knives and scissors, and we stood +on little planks of wood and shuddered, with furs up to our ears, but +they wore no hats or jackets, and their sleeves went flap, flap, as thin +as possible. There was only one pretty one among them, all the rest +looked--hideous! There was a goal at one end, _here_, and another, +_here_." Ella drew a rough map of the ground on the back of an +envelope, and Rhoda looked on with breathless interest. "This team +wanted to make a goal _here_, and the other side tried to prevent them. +They whacked with their sticks, and off went the ball, and each side +flew after it, trying to send it the way they wanted, and one poor, +wretched girl stood before each goal to prevent the enemy's ball from +entering. I expected they would both die of consumption the next day, +but I met them out at tea, quite spry and lively, and they said they +didn't feel cold a bit. I didn't believe them, but that's nothing. An +umpire marched about in leggings, and blew a whistle, and called out +`Off side! Off side!'" + +"And what did he mean by that?" + +Ella hesitated, uncertainly. Her knowledge of the game was of the +slightest, but she was anxious to help her friend, and gallantly tried +to recall odd explanations. + +"Oh, well, I think one of the wrong side hit, you know, and there is a +rule that you may not send the ball straight forward to one of your own +side, but must hit it back to some one behind you." + +"But that's silly! If you want to get on as fast as you can, why on +earth must you go _back_? If they never hit forward, how can they win. +Do you mean to say they _never_ send it forwards towards the goal?" + +"Oh, yes, yes! One girl was splendid. She hit magnificently. She ran +like a man, and sent it flying before her, and made three goals +herself." + +"Then how--why--what--what in the world did you mean by saying that you +_mustn't_ do it?" demanded Rhoda sternly, and Ella made a gesture as of +tearing her hair in confusion. + +"I don't know! It isn't easy to understand a game when you see only one +match. I was confused myself, but I know each side tries for a +different goal, and there are `backs' and `half-backs' and `forwards,' +just as at football, and, whatever you do, you must not raise your stick +above your waist. It's a murderous-looking game, anyhow. I wondered +that they weren't all killed; and one girl's hand was bleeding horribly. +I asked her if it was very painful, and she stared and said, `Oh, I +hadn't noticed it!' and mopped it up with her handkerchief. Awfully +callous, I call it." + +"Oh, I don't know!" replied Rhoda, airily. "Those flesh wounds don't +hurt. I should never think of taking any notice of a little thing like +that. Well, I can't say I am very much wiser for your instructions, my +dear, but I will pump Harold and see what I can get out of him. I have +no doubt I could hit all right, for I have a quick eye, and if you can +play one or two games it helps you with the rest. But I should be +pretty mad if I made a hit and they whistled at me and made me come +back. I like to know what I am about." + +"You had better be a goal-keeper," advised Ella, wisely; "you have no +running to do until the ball comes your way, and then at it you go, +tooth and nail! Stop it somehow--anyhow--with your hands, your feet, +your skirt, your stick. I believe there is an etiquette about it, don't +you know, as there is about all those things, and that it's more swagger +to stop it one way than another, but the main thing is to stop it +_somehow_, and that you simply must do!" + +"Humph! If you can! What happens if you can't?" + +"Emigrate to Australia by the first boat! I should think so, at least, +to judge by the faces of the other girls when one poor creature _did_ +let a ball in. Feerocious, my dear! there was no other word for it. My +heart ached for her. But it was a stupid miss, for it looked so easy. +I felt sure I could have stopped it." + +"It's all a matter of nerve. If you lose your head you are sure to play +the fool at a critical moment. Fraulein was like that. The moment the +game went against her she began to hop about, and puff and pant, and +work herself into such a fever that she couldn't even see a ball, much +less hit it. I kept calm, and so of course I always won." + +It did strike Ella that victory under such circumstances would be easily +gained, but she was too loyal to say so, and Rhoda leant back against +the cushions of the sofa, and continued to discourse on games in +general, and school games in particular, with an air of such intimacy +and knowledge that no one would have suspected that the object of her +visit had been to listen, rather than to teach. + +Ella listened meekly to a recital of what her friend intended to do, and +be; of the examinations she would pass, the honours she would gain; the +influence she would exercise over her fellows; and sighed to think of +her own limitations, and the impossibility of such a career ever falling +to her lot. And then Rhoda rose, and put on her gloves preparatory to +saying good-bye. + +"I shall come down to see you again, of course, but I shall be very +busy. I am going to have a complete new outfit, and everything as nice +as possible." + +"Ye-es," said the Vicar's daughter. + +"I shall have all my best skirts lined with silk." + +"Ah!" sighed Ella, and felt a pang of keenest envy. She had never +possessed a silk lining in her life. It seemed to her at times that if +she could only hear herself rustle as she walked, there would be nothing +left to wish for in life! + +"They will think you are a Princess!" she said, and Rhoda smiled, and +did not attempt to deny the impeachment. + + + +CHAPTER FOUR. + +DEPARTURE. + +Mr and Mrs Chester returned from their visit to Hurst Manor with +somewhat different accounts of the establishment. The father was +delighted with all he had seen, thought the arrangements excellent, and +Miss Bruce a charming and lovable woman. The mother did not see how +draughts were to be avoided in those long, bare passages, considered the +hours of work cruelly long, and was convinced that Miss Bruce could be +very stern if she chose. Her husband laughed, and declared that a +school of two hundred girls would fare badly indeed if she could not, +and the maternal fears were silenced at once by his banter, and by +Rhoda's fearless confidence. + +It was finally decided that the girl should join at the beginning of the +term, and preparations were set on foot without delay. It was almost +like buying a trousseau, Rhoda declared; and certainly no bride-elect +could have taken a keener interest in her purchases. The big, new box +with her initials on the side; the dressing-bag with its dainty +fittings; the writing-case and workbox; the miniature medicine chest +stocked with domestic remedies, in case she should feel feverish or +chilled, have earache, toothache, or headache; be threatened with sore +throat or swollen glands--they were all new possessions, and as such +afforded acute satisfaction, for though the wardrobe list was +disappointingly short, there were at least no restrictions as to +quality. + +When the key was turned in her box Rhoda heaved a sigh of satisfaction +in the confidence that not one of the two hundred girls could possess a +better equipment than her own. Then she looked round her dismantled +room, and felt a pang of depression. It looked so _dead_--as if its +owner had already departed, and left it to its fate. The wardrobe door +swung apart and revealed the empty pegs; the drawers were pulled open +and showed piles of torn-up letters; the carpet was strewn with pins. +All the treasured ornaments had been stored away, and the ugly ones +looked uglier than ever, as if infected by the general dejection. In +story-books girls were wont to bid a sentimental adieu to their maiden +bowers before leaving for a new sphere, but Rhoda did not feel in the +least inclined to be sentimental; she took to her heels instead and ran +downstairs, only too glad to escape from her dreary surroundings, and +presently she and her mother _were_ driving towards the station on the +first stage of the eventful journey. + +The village women stood at the doors of their cottages to put their +aprons to their eyes, and murmur, "Ay, poor dear!" as she drove past; +little Tommy Banks threw a nosegay of marigolds through the carriage +window, and waddled away, scarlet with confusion; and there was quite a +gathering of friends on the platform. + +Ella had brought a box of home-made Fuller's sweets from herself and a +dainty copy of _The Christian Year_ as the Vicar's farewell offering; +Mrs Ross had a stack of magazines for reading on the journey, and +little Miss Jones, who owed all the comforts of life to Mrs Chester's +friendship, presented the most elaborate "housewife," stocked with every +necessary which it seemed probable that a girl at school would _not_ +require. It was all most touching and gratifying. Even the station- +master came up to express his good wishes, and the one-eyed porter +blurted out, "Glad to see you back, Miss!" as if it were impossible to +suppress his feelings a moment longer. + +Rhoda felt an insight into the feelings of Royalty as she stood at the +window of the carriage, graciously smiling and bowing so long as she +remained in sight, and when this excitement was over, another appeared +to take its place. Mrs Chester was discovered to be crying in quite +uncontrolled fashion, and at the sight of her tears Rhoda put on her +severest air. + +"Mother! What are you doing? You must _not_ cry! Please remember that +in half an hour we shall be at Euston, and meet the school. I should +never get over it if the girls saw my mother with a red face!" + +Mrs Chester mopped her eyes obediently, and made a valiant effort to +regain her composure. For herself, poor dear, she cared little about +appearances, but Rhoda had already exhibited an intense anxiety that she +should make a good impression on the minds of her future school-fellows. +Each separate article of clothing had been passed in review, while the +bonnet had been changed three times over before the critic was +satisfied. It would never do to spoil an effect which had been achieved +with so much trouble; so the unselfish creature gulped down her tears, +and tried to talk cheerfully on impersonal topics, keeping her eyes +fixed on the landscape the while, lest the sight of her child might +prove too much for her resolution. + +Rhoda was immaculate in blue serge coat and skirt, and sailor hat with a +band of school colours. Nothing could have been simpler; but there are +ranks in even the simplest garments, and she was agreeably conscious +that her coat was not as other coats, neither was her skirt as other +skirts. The hand of the Regent Street tailor was seen in both, and +there was a new arrangement of pleats at the back which ought in itself +to secure the admiration of the school! She was all complacency until +Euston was reached, when the first glimpse at a group of "Hurst" girls +smote her to earth. She had sewn the band on her hat upside down, +putting the wide stripe next the brim, which should by rights have been +the place of the narrow! To the cold, adult mind such a discovery might +seem of trifling importance, but to the embryo school-girl it was +fraught with agonising humiliation. It looked so ignorant, so stupid; +it marked one so hopelessly as a recruit; Rhoda's cheeks burned crimson; +she looked searchingly round to see if by chance any other strangeling +had fallen into the same error, but, so far as bands were concerned, she +was solitary among the throng. + +A governess, seeing the two figures standing apart from the rest, came +forward and welcomed Rhoda with a few kindly words, but she was too busy +to spare time for more than a greeting. Fresh girls kept arriving with +every moment--a crowd of brisk, alert, bustling young creatures, +skurrying along bags in hand, and bright eyes glancing to right and +left. At every step forward there would come a fresh recognition, a nod +of the head, a wave of the hand, a quick "Halloa!" more eloquent than +elegant. Rhoda felt a spasm of loneliness at the realisation that no +greeting waited for herself, and at the strangeness of the many faces. +She looked critically around and came to the most unfavourable +conclusions. + +"I don't like that one--she's a fright! I hate that one--she's so +affected. Those two look common; I won't have anything to do with +_them_. The big one with spectacles looks horribly learned. The one +with the violin has a most unmusical face. _She_ looks fit for +stratagems if you like! The little one in brown is a cunning fox, I can +see it in her eyes. Of all the plain, uninteresting, stodgy set of +girls--" + +There was a movement inside the saloon carriage opposite, and a large +mamma clad in black, with a profusion of bugles, stepped on to the +platform and marched stolidly away. She steered a course clear of the +crowd of girls, the ends of her mantle floating behind her, like a brig +in full sail before the breeze, while her poor little daughter hung out +of the doorway gazing after her, sobbing bitterly, and mouthing in +pathetic, helpless misery. + +Mrs Chester began to cry at once in sympathy, and even Rhoda felt a +smarting of the eyes. It was coming! The crucial moment was at hand; +the bell was ringing, the girls were crowding into the carriages, the +governess stepped forward and spoke a warning word. + +"You had better come now, dear! Please take your seat." + +Rhoda turned and bent her tall young head to her little mother, but +neither spoke--the tension was too great. Mrs Chester's face was +tremulous with agitation, the girl's white and defiant. Then she +stepped into the carriage and seated herself among the crowd of +strangers. The girls were all silent now, pale of face and red of eye, +a few crying openly, the majority fighting against emotion. The mothers +came to the edge of the platform, and stared in through the windows. + +"It is like looking at animals in a cage," said Rhoda to herself, and +then the wheels began to move, she saw her mother's quivering face--saw +it from a distance--saw it no more--and realised for the first time, +with a great, bitter pang of anguish, the meaning of farewell! + +She had not intended to cry, she had never believed it possible that she +_would_ cry, but it was hard work to resist it during the next half- +hour, when every second bore her further from home, and the strangeness +of her surroundings pressed more heavily upon her. Other girls were +beginning to cheer up and exchange confidences with their companions, +but she had no one with whom to talk. Two girls opposite--the foxey one +and the affected one--were chatting quite merrily together. The +affected one, whose name appeared to be Hilda, had spent part of her +holiday at Boulogne, and was discoursing on the delights of Continental +bathing, while Foxey, not to be outdone, would have her know that +Scarborough kept pace with all the Continental methods. + +Another girl made the harrowing discovery that she had left her +spectacles at home, and announced the same to a chum, who remarked that +it was "a ripping joke!" The violin girl had had a bicycling accident, +and exhibited her scars with pride. The shock of parting over, they all +seemed very happy together, very friendly, very absorbed; far too much +absorbed to notice a new-comer, or trouble themselves on her behalf. +The governess stood by Rhoda's side for a few minutes and made remarks +in an aggressively cheerful manner, but her reception was not +encouraging, and presently she went away, and did not return. + +Rhoda looked at the pictures in her magazines, or pretended to look, for +her brain was so much occupied with other matters that she could not +grasp their meaning, and after five minutes' inspection would hardly +have been able to say whether she had been studying the features of a +country landscape or those of a society beauty. Then she turned and +cautiously examined her neighbours. The girl to the right was a square, +stolid-looking creature, square-faced, square-shouldered, with square +toes to her boots, and elbows thrust out on each side in square, +aggressive fashion. Her eyes were small and light, and her nose a +defiance of classic traditions; the corners of her mouth turned down, +and she had at once the solemnest and the most mischievous expression it +is possible to imagine. After a critical survey of her charms, Rhoda +felt that she was not the person with whom to force a conversation, and +turned her attention to the neighbour on her left. + +A recruit, surely; for, though her hat-band was in order, there was in +her mien an absence of that brisk, independent air which seemed to +characterise the old Hurst girl. A pretty damsel, too, with curling +hair and soft dark eyes, which at the present moment were bent in +elaborate scrutiny on the paper before her. Rhoda noticed that it was +the advertisement page at which she was looking, and suspected a pre- +occupation kindred to her own. She coughed slightly and ventured a +gentle question-- + +"Is this your first term at school?" + +The dark-eyed girl turned a fleeting glance upon her, so fleeting that +it seemed as if she had never altered her position, and replied +monosyllabically: + +"Yes." + +"You are going up, like me, for the first time?" + +"Yes." + +"And you have never been to school before?" + +"Yes." + +"I mean a boarding school. A big school like this, on all the new +lines?" + +"Yes." + +This was disconcerting! What _did_ she mean? It was her first term, +she was a new girl, and yet she had been up before! What was the girl +thinking about! She might really trouble herself to say more than one +single word. + +"But you said--I understood you to say--" + +Brown Eyes turned fiercely upon her, and fairly snapped in indignation. + +"I don't care what I said, or what you understood. Can't you _see_ I +want to be quiet? Can't you leave me alone? If I am a new girl, I +don't want to howl before all the others, do I! Very well, then! don't +make me talk! Read your book, and let me read mine." + +"I _beg_ your pardon!" said Rhoda, in her most stately manner. She took +up her magazine obediently, but now it was more impossible than ever to +read it, for she was tingling with mortification. Such a snub from a +stranger, and when she was trying to be friendly too! It would be a +long time before she troubled Brown Eyes again. Her thoughts went back +regretfully to Ella, the loyal, the sympathetic, the faithfully +admiring. If Ella were only here now, how different it would be! Why +had she not thought of it before, and asked her parents to pay Ella's +fees, so that she might have the solace of her presence? They would +have done it gladly, but, alas! Ella could not have been spared from +home. She had to help her mother; to be governess as well as pupil, +teaching the younger children for part of every day. No! Ella was +impossible; but the craving for companionship grew so intense that it +even conquered the dread inspired by her other companion, and +strengthened her to make yet another effort. + +The train had just left a station whose name was familiar in her ears, +and she realised that they had crossed the boundary between two +counties, and were now in Blankshire, in which Hurst Manor itself was +situated. To remark on this fact seemed an innocent and natural manner +of opening a conversation, so she turned towards Square Face, and said +brightly, "Now we are in Blankshire, I see! I have never been here +before. The country looks very pretty and undulating." + +The girl turned and stared at her with a wooden stolidity of feature. +Seen at close quarters she appeared to Rhoda as at once the most +extraordinarily ugly and comical-looking creature she had ever beheld. +Her little eyes blinked, and the thin lips flapped up and down in an +uncanny fashion that refused to be likened to any ordinary thing. There +was a moment's silence, then she repeated in a tone of the utmost +solemnity-- + +"The country is very pretty and undulating--you are quite right. Your +remark is most apt! May I ask if you would object to my repeating it to +my friend over here? She would be so very much interested." + +She was so preternaturally grave, that for a moment Rhoda was taken in +by the pretence, the next she flushed angrily, and tilted her head in +the air, but it was of no avail, for already the next girl was tittering +over the quotation, and turning to repeat it in her turn. The simple +words must surely contain some hidden joke, for on hearing it each +listener was seized with a paroxysm of laughter, and face after face +peered forward to stare at the originator, and chuckle with renewed +mirth. It was a good ten minutes before it had travelled round the +carriage and been digested by each separate traveller, and then, so far +from dying out, it acquired fresh life from being adapted to passing +circumstances, as when the train having stopped at a junction and moved +on again with a jerk, Square Face fell prone into her companion's arms, +and excused herself with a bland-- + +"Excuse me, dear. It's my little way. I _am_ so pretty and +undulating," and instantly the titters burst out afresh. + +Rhoda's face was a study, but even as she sat fuming with passion, a +voice spoke in her ear from the side where Brown Eyes still studied her +advertisements. + +"Laugh, can't you?" said the voice. "Laugh, too, as if you enjoyed the +joke. It's the only way. They will go on all the more if they see you +are angry." + +"I hate them all!" hissed Rhoda savagely, and the other heaved a sigh. + +"Ah, so do I, but they shan't hate me if I know it! I'm sorry I +snapped, but I'll talk now, and for pity's sake don't look so dismal. +Let us look over this paper together, and make remarks, and smile as if +we were enjoying ourselves too." + +"I don't feel as if I should ever enjoy myself again. It's hateful +going to school. If I had known it was as bad as this I would never +have come." + +"There's a lake in the grounds. We will drown ourselves together after +tea, but in the meantime do please keep up appearances. Don't give +yourself away before all these girls!" + +Rhoda looked at her curiously, and felt a thrill of comfort at finding a +friend in the midst of her desolation. "What is your name?" she queried +eagerly, and the dark eyes met hers in a solemn stare. + +"Marah, for bitterness. That's how I feel to-day, anyhow. My +godmothers and godfather christened me Dorothy, and in festive moments I +have even answered to `Doll,' but I'd murder any one who called me that +to-day. Now, I'll show you something interesting... I've travelled on +this line before, and if you look out of the window you can catch a +glimpse of Hurst Manor as we pass the next station. It stands in its +own grounds with nothing between it and the line. Over there to the +right--you can't miss it if you keep your eyes open. Now! There! That +gaunt, grey building." + +Rhoda looked, and there it lay--a gaunt building, indeed, with row upon +row of tall, bare windows staring like so many eyes, and out-standing +wings flanked like sentinels on either side. The poor recruit's face +lengthened with horror. + +"It looks," she said dismally, "like a prison! It looks as if when you +once got in, you would never never get out any more!" + + + +CHAPTER FIVE. + +FIRST IMPRESSIONS. + +Ten minutes later the journey came to an end, and the girls surged out +on to the platform of the country station. A line of waggonettes, +cheerfully denominated "Black Marias" by the pupils, was in waiting, and +with less confusion than might have been expected the girls divided into +different parties, and seated themselves in the carriages marked with +their own house colours. Rhoda and her travelling companions, being all +"blue," were among the first to drive off, each girl clutching the +handbag which contained the immediate necessities of her toilet, and +chattering away at the pitch of her voice. "Square Face" was evidently +the wag of the party, and was treated with an admiring deference which +seemed to bespeak a position of importance. She was professionally +addressed as "Tom," and Rhoda from her seat opposite, read the words, +"Thomasina Bolderston," upon the label of the bag, and reflected that +she had never heard a name more entirely appropriate to its owner. It +was at once so ugly, so uncommon, and so arresting to the memory, while +Tom herself, once seen, could never be forgotten, nor confounded with +another girl. There she sat, the keen autumn air blanching her cheeks +and reddening her eyes, her arms crossed squarely over her bag, her lips +twitching with mischievous enjoyment. She had but to roll her eyes, and +the girls went into fresh convulsions of laughter; and when, at the +entrance to "Hurst" grounds, she took out her handkerchief and affected +to sob, the merriment reached an almost hysterical pitch. Rhoda, +however, failed to appreciate the humour of the joke, being inclined to +cry in good truth as the grim doorway yawned before her, and she caught +a glimpse of the chill, grey hall, so different from the glowing warmth +of her own dear home. + +Dorothy gripped her arm in sympathetic fashion as they alighted and fell +into position in the long line of girls, who had suddenly thrown off +their hoyden airs, and assumed a demeanour of severe propriety. The +queue wended its serpentine course down the hall itself, and across a +smaller corridor to the head of the great staircase, where stood a lady +in a black silk dress, and a cap with lavender ribbons, crowning bands +of iron-grey hair. She was in reality small of stature, but she held +herself with an air which gave her the appearance of being six feet high +at least, and as she shook hands with each girl she addressed to her a +word of greeting. + +"How do you do, Mary? Glad to see you, Kathleen. Hope you are better, +Ella. Welcome back, Carrie!" and so on, and so on. Occasionally there +came a hesitation, and the greeting terminated without a name being +added, but whenever this was the case there was a knitting of the brows +which showed distinct annoyance. Miss Bruce evidently took a pride in +remembering her pupils, and was hard on herself for any forgetfulness. +When it came to the turn of the new girls, she detained them a moment to +hope they would be happy, before waving them forward with an encouraging +smile. + +"That's what we call being `presented.' She is the Queen, and on the +next landing are `the Lords,' and on the second `the Commons,'" +whispered a girl, who being herself only in her second term was not +averse from posing as preceptor. Rhoda lifted her eyes and beheld an +array of governesses standing before her, shaking hands and welcoming +the pupils in their turn. Some looked formidable and learned, some did +not. Some had the orthodox braided locks and spectacles, some even +condescended to the frivolity of a `fringe,' but one and all bore +themselves with a dignity worthy of a foremost position in the newest of +all new schools. + +Rhoda passed by as in a dream, and felt far more interest in "the +Commons," who were for the most part young women removed from girlhood +by so slight a barrier that there was a tone of comradeship in their +voices, a sympathetic understanding in their glance. The sweetest +looking of all was evidently in special charge of the Blues, and, walked +by the side of the two new girls as the detachment filed along the +endless corridor towards its own apartments. + +"You two are sisters? No! Ah, well, you must pretend you are, for a +day or two at least, until you get over the first loneliness. Every one +feels lonely at first among such a crowd of strangers, but it soon +passes, and we are very happy together. You must come and sit with me +in my little den sometimes. I'll ask you to tea on Sunday, and you must +always come to me if you are in any difficulty. In the meantime do as +the other girls do, and you will get along quite easily. You are in the +same room. Wash and get ready for tea at once. The gong will ring in +half an hour, and after that your boxes will have arrived and you will +be able to unpack." + +They reached the door of the dormitory as she finished speaking, and the +girls entered, trying not to feel as if they were being introduced to a +prison cell, or to be unduly cast down because they were separated by +half the length of the room. + +"If we could have been next each other and just wobbled the curtain +occasionally it would have been friendly!" sighed Rhoda, sinking down on +the solitary chair and gazing forlornly round her new abode. A bed, a +wash-stand, a chest of drawers with a glass on top, a small fixture +wardrobe, and about three yards of space on which to disport her own +fair self--different quarters, indeed, from her room at home, with its +spacious floor, its deep bay windows, its adjoining dressing-room and +bathroom! When the curtains were drawn there was a feeling of cramped +confinement which was most depressing to the spirits; yet, as her eye +took in one detail after the other, Rhoda realised that there were +redeeming points in the situation. Small as it was, the cubicle was +decidedly pretty, and blue enough to satisfy the blondest of mistresses. +Blue was the paint on the walls, blue the mat on the floor, blue and +white the coverlet on the bed, blue the quaintly shaped china on the +wash-stand. She remembered with a thrill of satisfaction that her own +bags and cases were of the same hue, and took off her hat feeling that +she had found an oasis in the desert of life. + +Half-an-hour seemed a long time to prepare for tea, when no change of +garment was possible, but it passed so quickly that the sound of the +gong came as a surprise, and she emerged from her retreat to find her +room-mates already filing towards the door. Thomasina led the way, +staring at Rhoda's locks with an amusement which the girl found it hard +to fathom. She had brushed out the curling mane with even greater care +than usual, and was conscious that it was as tidy as nature had intended +it should be. Then why stare and smile? She could not understand, but +Thomasina only said enigmatically-- + +"Gather ye rosebuds while ye may! Come on, Fuzzy!" and led the way out +into the corridor. + +Lines of girls were appearing on every side--along this corridor, along +that, down narrow nights of stairs, around unexpected corners, all +converging steadily on the central staircase. It was like a game of +"Follow my leader," and Rhoda could not but admire the ease and skill +with which "Tom" avoided collision, and marshalled her party to its own +table in the great dining-hall. When every one was seated, and grace +said, the clatter of cups and saucers began, and Rhoda had her first +experience of a school meal. + +Well! the tea was very welcome, and it certainly was hot, but somehow or +other it did not taste like the tea at home. There was so much "cup" +about it--perhaps that was the explanation. It was quite an effort to +get one's lips over the rim. Thickness seemed to be the order of the +day when one looked from the china to the slices of bread and butter +piled in the many plates. One such chunk would make a meal in itself, +thought Rhoda, nibbling fastidiously at the first slice, but whether +from the fatigue of the long journey or the stimulating effect of +companionship, her appetite seemed to be unusually keen, and when it was +finished she put out her hand to take a second slice. + +Instantly Thomasina's voice rang out in warning. "Stop that, Fuzzy! +That's forbidden!" Rhoda stared at her in dignified displeasure. "My +name happens to be Rhoda Chester!" + +"Congratulate you, I'm sure. Couldn't be sweeter; but you mustn't break +rules, Rhoda Chester, all the same. The rule in this school is that no +girl helps herself at meals, or asks for more, or pays any attention to +her own plate." + +"But if I am hungry? If I _want_ more? How am I to get it?" + +"You must rely on the thoughtfulness and attention of your neighbours. +Each girl is supposed to look after those beside her, but if she forgets +you must starve in silence, knowing that you suffer in a good cause. I +find myself that a slight nudge applied to the elbow just as the cup is +being carried to the mouth is a useful and judicious reminder... Let me +press a piece of plum-cake upon you, Miss Chester!" + +She held out the plate of bread with her squarest smile, and Rhoda +smiled back with a curious sense of elation. She questioned herself +curiously as to its cause, and made the surprising discovery that it was +because Thomasina had spoken to her, and showed some faint signs of +friendliness! + +Tea over, there was another game of "Follow my leader," to the top story +of the building this time, where all the length of a corridor was lined +by baggage, with the mysterious addition of a flat wicker clothes-basket +beside each trunk. The house-mistress, Miss Everett, was flitting to +and fro, and explained to the bewildered new girls that as the cubicles +afforded no room for the accommodation boxes they must unpack upstairs, +and carry down their possessions to store in drawers and wardrobes. + +For the next hour and a half, therefore, the curious scene was witnessed +of sixty pupils staggering downstairs in turns under the weight of heavy +baskets of clothes, and meeting with sundry adventures by the way. Lazy +girls gave themselves the usual additional share of trouble by +overweighting their load and toppling it over on the floor; hasty girls +tripped on the stairs and collapsed in a heap, with a rain of boots +falling on their head and pins showering broadcast through the +banisters; careless girls took a rest to ease aching backs, then nipped +up the wrong basket and bore it away, to reappear ten minutes later, +puffing and injured, and receive indignant reproaches from the rightful +owners. + +Rhoda worked with a will, undisturbed by any such interruptions. It was +with the unconsciousness of habit that she shook out her silk-lined +skirts, on lifting them from the box, but the rustling sound could not +be mistaken, and instantly she was aware that the girls on either side +were mincing round in affected fashion, shaking out their own skirts, +and simpering meaningly in her direction. + +At the first glance from her eyes they became statues of propriety, but +she felt their ridicule, and catching the giggles of laughter which +followed her retreat blushed over cheek and neck in an agony of +mortification. + +After all, was it appropriate to bring fine clothes to school? Where +the rules of the house were plain living and high thinking, was it not +better to dress accordingly? Might not display savour of ignorance, of +lack of perception, of--oh, horrors!--of snobbishness itself? + +The new dresses hung neglected on their pegs, and Rhoda put on a silk +blouse with her serge skirt, and walked down to supper in mental +sackcloth and ashes. + +But here was a pleasant surprise! The room was not grey any longer, but +flooded with rosy light from the pink-hued shades which covered the +electric burners. The girls, too, were no longer clad in dark blue as +in a uniform, but shone forth in blouses of brilliant hues, pink, blue, +red, and white alternating gaily, with an occasional green or yellow to +add to the variety. There was in the atmosphere an indefinable air of +relaxation, of rest after labour, which added tenfold to the brightness +of the scene. What if on each plate there was only a morsel of fish, +not half enough to satisfy clamourous appetites, there was unlimited +bread and jam to follow, and if cocoa was not the drink of all others +which one would have chosen, it was at least wholesome and satisfying. +Rhoda ate and was thankful, and felt ready for bed even before the +summons came. Several times during the day, when her feelings had +threatened to become too keen for endurance, but pride had forbidden +outward demonstration, she had cherished a determination to cry +comfortably in bed; but when the time came she was so sleepy, so +exhausted with excitement, the bed was so unexpectedly sympathetic, that +she forgot her resolution, and, snoodling down on the pillow, fell +swiftly and happily asleep. + + + +CHAPTER SIX. + +TOM'S RULE. + +The next moment, as it seemed, there came the roll of a distant gong, +and instantly there burst into life a score of jangling bells, clanging +and tinkling over one's very head in a manner calculated to destroy the +strongest nerves. Rhoda felt an agonised certainty that the Chase was +on fire, and springing up was confronted by the blue walls of her little +cubicle. Memory came back then, and with a pang of regret she lay back +in bed, listening to the succession of groans, yawns, and sighs which +arose from every corner of the room. + +They were so eloquent that one could almost _see_ the sleepers +stretching themselves in turn, blinking heavy lids, and rubbing +dishevelled locks like so many sleek, lazy kittens. For a moment no one +spoke, then began a chorus of lamentations. + +"Seven o'clock! It can't be true. I haven't slept a wink all night!" + +"I've been getting up at half-past eight all the holidays, and having a +cup of tea in bed before that. It's killing going back to this!" + +"Wait till the mornings are dark, and the water is frozen in the jugs; +that's the time it is really fun. This is a mere trifle." + +"It's not a trifle at all. I'm a growing girl, and need sleep. If Miss +Bruce had any heart she would see it, and give me an excuse." + +"She'll give you a mark instead, if you are not quick. Hurry up now! +No laggards!" cried Thomasina's voice, in answer to which there came +still louder groans, and the creaking of bedsteads as one girl after +another rose to her feet. + +Rhoda rose with the rest, and for ten minutes there was silence, broken +only by the splashing of water. Then suddenly the air was filled with a +deep, melodious roll, at which, as at a signal, Thomasina appeared from +her lair--beautiful in a magenta dressing-jacket, and hair coiled in a +tight little knot at the top of her head--and opened wide the door of +the dormitory. Rhoda, peering from between her curtains could see other +doors opening all the way down the corridor, and bare arms hastily +withdrawn from view, while all the time the music swelled into fuller +force, and pealed over the great, silent house like some majestic +wakening voice. + +"What is it?" she queried breathlessly, and Thomasina answered from +behind her curtain: + +"The organ, of course. The organ in the hall. One of the music +mistresses plays a voluntary every morning ten minutes after we get up, +and the choir sings a hymn. You will hear them presently. Each house +takes it in turn to do choir duty. It's the Greens this week." + +As she spoke the first note of the hymn sounded, and the words rose +clearly on the air:-- + + "Holy, holy, holy, Lord God Almighty, + Early in the morning our song shall rise to Thee. + Holy, holy, holy, Merciful and Mighty, + God in Three Persons, Blessed Trinity!" + +The clear voices were softened by distance into almost angelic +sweetness, the treble rang true and sweet against the harmonious +background of alto; the organ sank to a flute-like softness. It was an +unexpected and beautiful beginning to the day's work, and the tears +started to Rhoda's eyes as she listened, for she was of an emotional +nature, quick to respond to any outside influence. She followed each +line of the hymn with devout attention, and when it was finished knelt +down beside her bed to offer a prayer, which was much longer and more +fervent than it would have been ten minutes before. She prayed for +strength, for guidance, and--with a remembrance of yesterday's trials-- +for patience too, that she might be able to take a joke in good part, +and not value too highly her own dignity, and finally rose from her +knees in a glow of virtuous resolution. + +No sooner was she out of her cubicle than the blow descended. With the +glow of good resolution still upon her, she was tried--and fell! + +Thomasina regarded her critically, and said, with a cool assurance more +maddening than downright rudeness: + +"That coiffure is very becoming, Fuzzy, but it won't do here. Go back +to your den, and plait it in a pigtail like mine!" + +The glare of indignation, of scorn, of outraged dignity in Rhoda's eyes +was beyond description. She straightened her back into a poker of +obstinacy, and replied-- + +"I shall do no such thing! I shall wear my hair as I choose, and as I +have always worn it." + +"No you won't, my dear. Pigtails are the rule in this establishment, +and pigtails you must wear so long as you are within its walls." + +"If a teacher tells me to wear one, I shall obey. If it is a rule, some +one in authority will tell me. I won't be ordered by you." + +There was a gasp of astonishment throughout the room, and one head after +another peered out to stare at the rebellious spirit who dared to defy +that important personage, the Head Girl. + +Thomasina closed her eyes and smiled in maddening fashion. + +"That's where you make your mistake, sweet love, for it's just exactly +what you've got to do! I'm Head Girl, and don't you forget it. The +Queen on her throne is not more absolute than I am in this room. If you +don't do what I tell you, it will be my painful duty to report you for +insubordination, and it is a sad thing for a girl to get a mark on her +first day. I must trouble you for that pigtail, if you please." + +She was speaking the truth, that was evident! Confirmation was written +on every watching face, in every warning frown. Rhoda's pride battled +with a sense of helplessness so acute that she had much ado not to burst +into tears on the spot. The two girls stood confronting each other, the +new-comer flushed and quivering, like a beautiful young fury, with her +flaxen hair streaming over her shoulders, and her blue eyes sending out +sparks of fire; Thomasina composed and square, with her lips pursed up +in a good-humoured, tolerant smile. + +"Hurry up!" she said, and Rhoda whisked round and dashed behind her +curtain, which flew out behind in an aggrieved fashion, as if unused to +be treated with such scant courtesy. The next few moments seemed to +have concentrated in them a lifetime of bitterness. The comb tugged +remorselessly through the curling locks, but the physical pain passed +unnoticed; it was the blow to pride which hurt--the sharp, sharp stab of +finding herself worsted, and obliged to give in to the will of another. +It was nothing at that moment that the pigtail was ugly and unbecoming; +Rhoda would have shaved her head and gone bald for ever if by this means +she could have escaped that verdict; but to appear again before all the +girls with that hateful, hateful wisp hanging down her back--she felt as +if she would die rather than do it; yet would it not be even more +degrading to wait for a summons? She stalked forth, straight and +defiant, and was received with a bland smile. + +"Pretty fair for a first attempt. Plait it down further next time. I +must have my girls neat and tidy. Now then, forward please--Right, +left! right, left!" + +The order was accompanied by a tap on the shoulder, which put the +finishing touch to Rhoda's exasperation. She stepped into her place in +the queue, trembling from head to foot, and with a painful throbbing in +her head which was something new in her healthy experience. Immediately +in front marched a tall, straight form, whom at first she failed to +recognise, but at the head of the staircase there came a temporary wait, +and then the head was turned towards her, and, behold, it was Dorothy +herself, pigtailed like the rest, and looking curiously reduced without +the background of hair. + +"Morning!" she cried cheerily, and Rhoda gasped a breathless question. + +"You too! Did she tell you? I never heard--" + +"Didn't give her a chance! Heard her ordering you, and nipped mine up +in a trice. Treat it as a matter of course, and don't seem to mind-- +that's the tip! Only get yourself disliked by making a fuss." + +"I know, but I _can't_ help it," sighed Rhoda dismally. + +"I'm not used to bullying, and it makes me wild. My head's splitting. +I feel all churned up." + +"Worse troubles at sea!" said Dorothy shortly, and after that there was +no more chance of conversation, for the queue moved on again, and they +were separated at breakfast as at dinner the night before. Thomasina +sat opposite to Rhoda, and pressed the various dishes upon her good- +temperedly, ignoring all causes of discord, an attitude which, if she +had only known it, but added to the score against her, for pride forced +a haughty "No, thanks," whilst appetite prompted "Yes, please." To sit +with empty plate, and see others feast on bread and marmalade is no +slight trial when one is fifteen and a-hungred, but no one urged Rhoda +to change her mind, or thought it possible to succeed where the Head +Girl failed. + +There were no regular lessons during the morning, but a great deal of +confusing moving to and fro from one class-room to another, to go over +preliminary arrangements, and receive instructions from the mistresses. +Sometimes the new girls were ignored altogether, and then they felt +worms, and ready to sink through the earth; sometimes they were +questioned as to their attainments, and then the very walls seemed to +have ears, and their replies echoed through a deadly silence. Dorothy +attained a fair level throughout, and reaped neither praise nor blame, +but Rhoda knew alternate rapture and despair, as Mademoiselle and +Fraulein beamed approval, and the "class-mistress" put up her eye- +glasses and regarded her as one might regard a wild animal at the Zoo, +upon hearing that she had "done" no Latin or mathematics. + +"You will not do much good at this school without them," she said, +severely. "They are the most important subjects. I advise you to give +all the time you can spare to working them up, and to get, if possible, +some coaching during the holidays. That is, of course, if you wish to +excel." + +If she wished to excel! _If_, indeed! Did any one suppose for a moment +that Rhoda Chester would be content to remain among the rank and file? +Did they think that she could continue to be ignored, and live! Ten +thousand times no! "A day would come!" as Disraeli had said. They +thought just now that she was nobody, but in time to come the school +would know her name, would be proud of it, would boast of it to other +schools. Rhoda reared her head and smiled complacently, and the class- +mistress noted the action, and made a mental note that the new pupil +must be "kept down." + +The morning seemed very long, but it came to an end at last with a +blessed ten minutes "off" before preparing for dinner. The other girls +hurried to their cubicles, but Rhoda waylaid Miss Everett in the +corridor, and appealed to her in breathless eagerness. + +"You said I was to come to you in any difficulty... I want to know if +it is necessary for me to wear my hair like this? I never do it at +home, and I'm sure my mother wouldn't like it. Is it really the rule?" + +"I'm afraid it is," said Miss Everett kindly. "You don't like it, eh? +Well, I don't wonder! I shouldn't myself, in your place; but you see, +dear, bending over desks, and running about at games, loose hair gets in +the way, and cannot possibly be kept tidy. It seems an arbitrary rule, +but there's reason in it, as there is in all the rules if you think them +out, and it doesn't apply to every day. On Thursday evening we have +`Frolics,' and then you can wear it loose, and put on your prettiest +things. There is always something going on--concerts, dances, or +theatricals--and Miss Bruce likes the girls to look bonnie and festive. +On Sundays, too, you can go back to your mop if you choose. I hope you +will, for I like to see it. I have a little sister with hair just like +yours." + +She laid her hand affectionately on the curly head, and the touch of +kindliness acted as balm to Rhoda's sore heart. Her eyes glistened with +unshed tears, and she said huskily: + +"I'll do anything _you_ tell me. I won't mind; but that Thomasina-- +she's hateful! I can't stand being ordered about by a girl of my own +age." + +"Ah-h!" cried Miss Everett, and sighed as at the recurrence of a well- +known trouble. "Well, you know, Rhoda, you must get over that feeling, +and conform to the rules of the school. Thomasina is a great help to +me, and makes a capital `head girl.' You see, dear, I have no time to +look after these details. The girls think that they are busy, but long +after they are asleep at night I am slaving away correcting exercises. +Oh such piles of books! it makes me tired even to see them. I'll do +what I can for you, but you mustn't expect too much; and after all, in a +week or ten days you will have mastered the rules, and the difficulty +will be over. You wouldn't make a fuss for one week, would you? Stay! +There is one thing I _can_ tell you now, and that is that you won't be +allowed to wear those slippers any longer. I'll give you an order, and +you can go downstairs to the bureau and get a pair of school shoes like +the other girls wear." + +Rhoda gasped with dismay. + +"What! Those frightful things with square toes and no heels! Those +awful tubs that Thomasina waddles about in!" + +Miss Everett laughed gaily. She was only a girl herself, and she cast a +quick glance up and down the corridor to see if any one were coming +before she drew aside her skirt to exhibit her own flat feet. + +"They _are_ awful! I love pretty shoes, too; and the first time I wore +these I--I _cried_! I was very home-sick, you see, and nervous and +anxious about my work, and it seemed the last straw. Never mind! it's +only a little thing, and on Thursday you shall wear your very best pair +and I'll wear mine, and we'll compare notes and see which is the +prettier." + +To say that Rhoda adored her is to state the matter feebly. She could +have knelt down in the passage and kissed the ugly little feet; she +could have done homage before this young mistress as before a saint; +when the light streamed out of a window and rested on her head, it +seemed to take the form of a halo! + +She went meekly downstairs, procured the shoes, and carried them into +Dorothy's cubicle, to display before the eyes of that horrified young +woman. + +"There! We've got to wear those, too! It's the rule. Miss Everett +told me, and gave me an order to get them. You had better ask her for +one before Thomasina gets a chance." + +Dorothy looked at her solemnly, and measured the slipper against her own +neat shoe; then she took off the latter and held the two side by side. +One was arched and slim, the other flat and square; one had French heels +and little sparkling buckles, the other was of dull leather, unrelieved +by any trace of ornament. + +"Here's deggeradation!" she sighed hopelessly. "Here's deggeradation!" + + + +CHAPTER SEVEN. + +THE RECORD WALL. + +There was no end to the surprises of that wonderful school! When Rhoda +returned to her cubicle to get "tidy" for dinner, she washed, brushed +her hair, put an extra pin in her tie to make sure that it was straight, +wriggled round before the glass to see that belt and bodice were +immaculately connected, put a clean handkerchief in her pocket, nicked +the clothes-brush over her skirt, and, what could one do more? It +seemed on the face of it that one could do nothing, but the other girls +had accomplished a great deal more than this. Rhoda never forgot the +shock of dismay which she experienced on first stepping forth, and +beholding them. It was surely a room full of boys, not girls, for +skirts had disappeared, and knickerbockers reigned in their stead. The +girls wore gym. costumes, composed of the aforesaid knickers, and a +short tunic, girt round the waist with a blue sash, to represent the +inevitable house colour. Thomasina's aspect was astounding, as she +strode to and fro awaiting the gathering of her forces, and the new +girls stared at her with distended eyeballs. Rhoda had registered a vow +never to volunteer a remark to the hateful creature; but Dorothy +stammered out a breathless-- + +"You never said--We never knew--Is it a _rule_?" + +"Not compulsory, or I would have told you; you may do as you please. +They wear gyms, at Wycombe in the afternoon, and we have adopted the +idea to a certain extent. Most of the girls prefer it for the sake of +the games, for it is so much easier to run about like this. For myself, +I affect it for the sake of appearances. It is so becoming to my +youthful charms." + +She simpered as she spoke, with an affectation of coyness that was +irresistibly amusing. Dorothy laughed merrily, and Rhoda resisted doing +the same only by an enormous effort of self-will. She succeeded, +however, in looking sulky and bad-tempered, and went downstairs feeling +quite pleased with herself for resisting an unworthy impulse. + +All the old girls were in gym. costume, and a quaint sight it was to +watch them descending the great central staircase. Lanky girls, looking +lankier than ever; fat girls, looking fatter than ever; tall girls +magnified into giantesses; poor little stumpies looking as if viewed +through a bad piece of window glass. Plump legs, scraggy legs, and legs +of one width all the way down, and at the end of each the sad, +inevitable shoe, and down each back the sad, inevitable pigtail! Now +and again would come a figure, light and graceful as a fawn, the +embodiment of charming youth; but as a rule the effect was far from +becoming. + +Rhoda's criticisms, however, were less scathing than usual, for she +herself was suffering from an unusual attack of humility! If any reader +of this veracious history has to do with the management of a self- +confident, high-spirited girl, who needs humbling and bringing to her +senses, let the author confidently recommend the pigtail and flat-heeled +system! To fasten back a mane of hair is at once to deprive the culprit +of one of her most formidable means of defence. + +She has no shelter behind which to retire, as an ambush from the enemy; +she has nothing to toss and whisk from side to side, expressing defiance +without a word being uttered. The very weight of the pigtail is a +sobering influence; its solemn, pendulum movement is incompatible with +revolt. As for the slippers--well, try heel-less shoes yourself, and +test their effect! They bring one to earth, indeed, in the deepest +sense of the word. All very well to mince about in French shoes, and +think "What a fine girl am I," but once try mincing in flat, square +soles, and you will realise that the days are over for that kind of +thing, and that nothing remains but humility and assent! + +Dinner over, the girls adjourned into the grounds; but as games, like +lessons, could not be begun without some preliminary arrangement, most +of the pupils contented themselves with strolling about, in twos and +threes, exchanging confidences about the holidays and hatching plans for +the weeks to come. Rhoda and Dorothy were standing disconsolately +together, when Miss Everett flitted past, and stopped for a moment to +take pity on their loneliness. + +"What are you two going to do? You mustn't stand here looking like +pelicans in the wilderness. You must walk about and get some exercise. +I'm too busy to go with you myself, but--er--Kathleen!" She held up her +hand in summons to the second-term girl who had volunteered information +about the Lords and Commons--"Here, Kathleen, you remember what it is to +be a new girl; take Rhoda and Dorothy round the grounds, and show them +everything that is interesting. Have a brisk walk, all of you, and come +back with some colour in your cheeks!" + +She was off again, smiling and waving her hand, and the three girls +stood gazing at each other in shy, uncertain fashion. + +"Well," said Kathleen, "where shall we go first? The Beech Walk, I +suppose; it's half-a-mile long, so if we go to the end and back we shall +have a constitutional before looking at the sights. The grounds are +very fine here, and there is lots of room for all we want to do. You +can find a sunny bit, or a shady bit, according to the weather, but it's +only on really scorching days that we are allowed to lounge. Then +there's a scramble for hammocks, and the lucky girls tie them on to the +branches of trees, and swing about, while the others sit on the grass. +Once or twice we had tea under the trees, and that was fine, but as a +rule they keep you moving. Games are nearly as hard work as lessons!" + +"But you needn't play unless you like?" + +"Oh, yes, you must; unless you are ill or tired. You can get off any +day if you don't feel well, but not altogether. And you would not wish +to either. It would be so horribly flat! Once you are into a team, you +are all anxiety to get into another, and I can tell you when you see +your remove posted up on the board, it is b-liss!--perfect bliss!" + +The recruits laughed, and looked at their new friend with approving +glances. She was, so far, the only one of the girls who had treated +them on an equality, and gave herself no air of patronage, and they were +correspondingly appreciative. They asked eagerly in which games she had +won her remove, and Rhoda, at least, was disappointed at the answer. + +"Cricket! That's the great summer game. I've three brothers at home, +and used to practise with them sometimes to make an extra one. They +snubbed me, of course: but I'm not a bad bat, though I say it myself." + +"And what about tennis?" + +"Um-m!" Kathleen pursed up her lips. "We have courts, of course, but +its rather--_Missy_, don't you think? The sports captains look down on +it, and so, of course, it's unpopular. The little girls play +occasionally. It keeps them happy." + +This was a nice way to speak of a game which had been for years the +popular amusement of young England! Rhoda was so shocked and +disappointed that she hardly dared mention croquet, and it seemed, +indeed, as if it would have been better if she had refrained, for +Kathleen fairly shouted at the name. + +"My dear, how can you! _Nobody_ plays croquet except old tab-- I mean +ladies who are too old to do anything else. Miss Bruce plays sometimes +when she has the vicar's wife to tea. We hide behind the bushes and +watch them and shake with laughter. _Croquet_, indeed! I should like +to see Tom's face if you mentioned croquet to her!" + +"It's a matter of perfect indifference to me what Miss Bolderston +thinks," said Rhoda, loftily; but she veered away from the subject of +games all the same and tackled lessons instead. + +"Are you working for any special examination, or just taking it easily?" + +"I'm going in for the Oxford Senior in summer. My birthday is so +horribly arranged that it comes just one week before the limit. A few +days later would give me a year to the good, but as it is it's my last +chance. If I can only scrape through in preliminaries I am not afraid +of the rest, but I am hopelessly bad in arithmetic. I add up with all +my fingers, and even then the result comes wrong; and when so much +depends upon it I know I shall get flurried and be worse than ever." + +"The great thing is to keep cool. If you don't lose your head, I +shouldn't wonder if the excitement helped you. Say to yourself, `_Don't +be a fool_!' and _make_ yourself keep quiet," quoth Miss Rhoda, with an +air of wisdom which evidently impressed her hearers. They glanced first +at her and then at each other, and the glance said plainly as words +could speak that here was a girl who had strength of mind--a girl who +would make her mark in the school! + +"I'll try!" said Kathleen, meekly. "I am terribly anxious about this +exam., for if I do well and pass better than any one else in the school +I shall get a scholarship of L40 towards next year's fees. That would +be a great help to my parents, for they are poor, and have only sent me +here that I may have a chance of getting on and being able to teach some +day. I should be so thankful if I could help, for it's horrid to know +the people at home are stinting themselves for your sake. I lie awake +at nights imagining that the report is in, and I am first, and then I +write a long letter home and tell them about it. Each time I invent a +fresh letter, and they are so touching, you can't think! I cried over +one, one night, and Tom came round to see what was the matter. At other +times I imagine I'm plucked, and I go cold all over; I think I should +_die_! Never mind, nine months yet! I'll work like a slave, and if I +_do_ fail no one can say it's my own fault." + +"You won't fail. Don't imagine anything so horrible! You will get over +your nervousness and do splendidly, and write your letter in real +earnest," cried Dorothy cheerily. "I am going in for the Oxford too, +but you need fear no rival in me. I am one of those deadly, +uninteresting creatures, who never reach anything but a fair medium. +There isn't a `distinction' in me, and one could never be first at that +rate. A scrape-through pass is all _I'm_ good for!" + +"I could get two distinctions at once! I know more German and French +than ninety girls out of a hundred. Two distinctions! It's a big +start. I wonder--I wonder if I could possibly be first!" said Rhoda to +herself, and her breath came fast, and her cheeks grew suddenly hot. +"Nine months! Nine months!" If she studied hard, and worked up the +subjects on which she was behind, might she not have a chance with the +rest? The first girl! Oh, if only it could be possible, what joy, what +rapture! What a demonstration of power before the school. She went off +into a blissful dream in which she stood apart, receiving the +congratulations of Miss Bruce and her staff, and saw Thomasina's face +regarding her with a new expression of awe. Then she came back to real +life, to look remorsefully at her new friend, and notice for the first +time her pinched and anxious air. + +"But I would give Kathleen the money. I want nothing but the honour," +she assured herself, shutting her mind obstinately against the +conviction that such a division might not be altogether easy to arrange. +"And Dorothy is going in, too; lots of girls are going in, so why +should not I? And if I enter I must do my best; nobody could object to +that!" + +Nevertheless there was an unaccountable weight on her heart, which made +it a relief when the subject dropped, and Kathleen began to point out +the various out-buildings scattered over the grounds. + +"That's the pavilion. We keep all the games there, and it's so nicely +furnished. There is quite a pretty sitting-room, and a stove, and all +the materials for making tea. On Saturday afternoons the winning teams +may stay behind and have tea there by themselves, and buy cakes from the +housekeeper. It's ripping! We look forward to it as the Saturday +treat, and aren't you just mad if your side loses! That's the joiner's +shop. You can have lessons if you like, and learn to make all sorts of +things; but I've no ambition to be a carpenter, so I don't go... That's +a summer-house, but it's so earwiggy that we leave it alone... That was +meant to be a swimming-bath, but the water comes straight from a well, +and it is so deadly cold that the girls got cramp, and Miss Bruce +forbade them to use it any more. It looks wretchedly deserted now. If +you want to be miserable all by yourself you couldn't have a better +place. It's so still and dark, and the birds have built their nests in +the corners, and come suddenly flying past, and frighten you out of your +wits... Those little patches are the girls' own gardens. You can have +lessons in gardening, and get a prize if you are clever. I don't go in +for that either, for it's an extra expense." + +"Oh, I must have a garden!" cried Rhoda quickly. "I adore flowers, and +they could send me cuttings from home. I always had my own garden, but +I didn't do the work, of course. I just said how it was to be arranged, +and what plants I wanted, and every one admired it, and said how +successful it was. I had big clumps of things, you know; not one +straggling plant here and another there, but all banked up together. +You should have seen my lily bed! I made the men collect all the odd +bulbs and plant them together, and they were a perfect show. The scent +met you half-way down the path; it was almost overpowering. And then I +had a lot of the new cactus dahlias, and left only about two branches on +each, so that they came up like one huge bush with all the lovely +contrasting colours. Many people say they don't like dahlias, but that +is only because they haven't seen them properly grown." + +"Oh well, I loathe them myself, and I always shall do. You never get +any satisfaction out of them, however pretty they may be, for as soon as +people see them, they begin groaning and saying, `Oh, dear, dear, autumn +flowers already! How sad it is. Winter will soon be upon us.'" +Dorothy sniffed derisively. It was evident that no support was to be +expected from her on the dahlia question, and Rhoda felt that only time +and experience could prove to her the folly of her position. + +When all the out-buildings had been explained, Kathleen led the way down +a winding path which seemed to lead to nowhere in particular, but rather +to come to an abrupt _cul-de-sac_ in the shape of a high grey wall. Her +companions wondered at her choice, but she went forward with an air of +determination, so that there was nothing left but to follow, and hope +soon to return to more interesting scenes. When she came to the end of +the path, however, she stood still and began to smile with a most +baffling air of mystery. What did it mean? What were they expected to +see? The girls wheeled to and fro, looked at the paths, the beds, the +flowers, frowned in bewilderment, and then suddenly lifted their eyes to +the wall, and uttered simultaneous exclamations of surprise. + +The wall was dotted over with little tablets of stone, on each of which +was a neatly engraved inscription, and each inscription bore the name of +a girl at its head. Rhoda craned forward and read first one and then +another: + +"...Winifred Barton, joined Hurst Manor, September, 189--, left +Christmas, 189--. The youngest pupil who ever obtained honours in +Mathematics in the Oxford Local Examinations." + +"Elizabeth Charrington, an old pupil of the school, obtained First Class +in the Honours School of Modern History at Oxford." + +"Eleanor Newman, joined Hurst Manor, September, 189--, left Mid., 189--. +Beloved by her fellow-students as the kindest and most loyal of +friends, the most unselfish of competitors. Held in grateful +remembrance for the power of her influence and example." + +"Fanny Elder. For two years Games President of the school. Winner of +the Wimbledon Lawn Tennis Tournament, 189--. Holder of Edinburgh Golf +Cup, 189--. A just and fearless sportswoman..." + +The list of names went on indefinitely, but Rhoda had read enough to +inflame curiosity, and wheeled eagerly round to confront Kathleen. + +"What is it? What does it mean? Who puts them up? Is it just the +cleverest girls?--" + +"It's the Record Wall!" said Kathleen. "We are very proud of our Record +Wall at Hurst. The cost of these tablets is paid by the pupils +themselves, and they are put up entirely at their discretion. The +teachers have nothing to do with it. If a girl has distinguished +herself at work, but is conceited and overbearing, and makes herself +disliked, no one wants to put up a tablet to _her_; so it is really a +testimony to character, as well as to cleverness. Eleanor Newman was +quite stupid, they say. I never knew her. She never passed a single +examination, nor took a prize nor anything, yet every one loved her. +She was a little, fair thing, with curly hair too short to tie back, and +soft, grey eyes. She wasn't a bit goody, but she always seemed waiting +to do kind things, and make peace, and cheer the girls when they were +home-sick. And no one ever heard her say a cross word, or make an +uncharitable remark." + +"And did she die?" croaked Rhoda solemnly. A long experience of girls' +stories had taught her that when girls were sweet and fair, and never +said an unkind word, they invariably caught a chill, and died of rapid +consumption. She expected to hear the same report of Eleanor Newman, +but Kathleen replied briskly: + +"Die! Not a bit of it. She married, at nineteen, a doctor down in +Hampshire, and brought him to see the school on their honeymoon. The +Greens escorted her in a body to the Record Wall, and when she saw her +own name she covered her face with her hands, and flew for her life. +And her husband looked quite weepy. The girls said he could hardly +speak!" + +"Ah-h!" sighed Rhoda, and was silent. She felt "weepy" too, filled with +a sudden yearning, a sudden realisation of want. Eleanor Newman had +risen to heights to which she could never attain. "A little, fair +thing, and almost stupid," yet her school-fellows loved her, and +immortalised her name in words of grateful loyalty. She sighed again, +and yet again, and heard Kathleen's voice cry sharply-- + +"Oh, I look at that empty space, and wonder if this time next year I +shall read there that I have passed first, and won the Scholarship. I +wonder if ever, ever there will be a tablet with my name upon it!" + +"I expect there will be," said Dorothy. "It's a lovely idea, and I can +imagine every girl longing to see her name on the scroll of honour; but +for my own part I never shall. Not for this child! There is no hope +for me, unless they put me up as `a good little tortoise who never fell +asleep.' The worst of it is that in real life the hare keeps awake too, +and spoils one's chance. I must be content to bloom, in obscurity--`A +violet by a mossy dell, half hidden from the eye'--" + +But Rhoda already saw a new tablet twinkling on the empty space, a +tablet recording phenomenal success and distinction, and the name at the +head of the inscription was not "Kathleen Murray," but one much more +familiar in her ears! + + + +CHAPTER EIGHT. + +AN ENCOUNTER. + +Sunday afternoon was hopelessly wet; but the fact was less regretted +than usual, as from three to four was the time put aside for writing +home. So far a postcard to announce safe arrival had been the only word +written, and each girl was eager to pour forth her feelings at length, +to tell the latest news, and report changes of class. The two new- +comers had a score of complaints and lamentations to record, and Rhoda, +at least, entered unhesitatingly into the recital. + +She had never been so miserable in her life. The girls were hateful, +domineering, and unfriendly--Miss Bruce had spoken to her three times +only--the food was good enough in its way, but so plain that she simply +longed for something _nice_; the lessons were difficult, the hours +unbearably long.--It took three whole sheets to complete the list of +grievances, by which time her hand was so tired that she read it over by +way of a rest, with the result that she was quite astonished to discover +how miserable she had been! Everything she had said was true, and yet +somehow the impression given was of a depth of woe which she could not +honestly say she had experienced. Perhaps it was that she had omitted +to mention the alleviating circumstances--Miss Everett's sweetness, +Fraulein's praise, hours of relaxation in the grounds, signs of +softening on the part of the girls, early hours and regular exercises, +which sent her to the simple meals with an appetite she had never known +at home. Five days at school, and on the whole there had been as much +pleasure as suffering. Then, was it quite fair to send home such a +misleading account? + +Rhoda drew from her pocket the latest of the five loving letters penned +by the maternal hand, and read it through for the dozenth time. Sunday +was a lonely day for new-comers, and the period occupied by the sermon +in church had been principally occupied by Rhoda in pressing back the +tears which showed a presumptuous desire to roll down her cheeks and +splash upon her gloves. It had been a sweet consolation to read over +and over again the words which showed that though she might be one of a +crowd at "Hurst," she was still the treasured darling of her home. +There was nothing original in the letter; it simply repeated in +different words the contents of its four predecessors--sorrow for her +absence, prayers for her welfare, anxiety for the first long letter. + +"I can hardly wait until Monday morning. I am so longing to know how +you are faring!" Rhoda read these words, and looked slowly down upon +her own letter. Well! it would arrive, and the butler would place it on +the breakfast-table, and her mother would come hurrying into the room, +and seize it with a little cry of joy. She would read it over, and +then--then she would hand it to her husband, and take out her +handkerchief and begin to cry. Mr Chester would pooh-pooh her +distress, but she would cry quietly behind the urn, and despite his +affectation of indifference he, also, would look worried and troubled; +while Harold would declare that every one must go through the same stage +before settling down, and that Rhoda might be expected to "make a fuss." +She had been so spoiled at home! + +Rhoda dug her pen into the blotting-paper, and frowned uneasily. Five +days' experience at school had impressed her with the feebleness of +"making a fuss." + +"If you are hurt--bear it! If you are teased--look pleasant! If you +are blamed--do better next time! If you feel blue--perk up, and don't +be a baby!" Such were the Spartan rules of the new life, and an +unaccustomed shame rose up in her mind at the realisation of the +selfishness and weak betrayal of that first home letter. Was it not +possible to represent the truth from the bright side as well as the +dark, to dwell on the kindnesses she had received, and leave +disagreeables untold? Yes, it _was_ possible; she would do so, and save +her dear ones the pain of grieving for her unhappiness. So the thick +sheets were torn across with a wrench, which made Thomasina look up from +her desk. + +As a head girl, "Tom" possessed a study of her own, to which she had +prepared to depart earlier in the afternoon, but had been persuaded to +stay by the entreaties of her companions. + +"Tom, don't go! Don't leave us! It's a wet day, and so dull--do stay +with us till tea-time. You might! You might!" urged the suppliant +voices, and so Tom sat down to her desk in the house-parlour which was +the property of the elder Blues, and indited letters on blue-lined, +manly paper, with a manly quill pen. + +As her eyes rested on the torn letter and on the clean sheet of paper +drawn up for a fresh start, she smiled, a quiet understand-all-about-it +smile, which Rhoda chose to consider an impertinent liberty. Then down +went her head again, and the scrape, scrape of pens continued until four +o'clock, by which time the girls were thankful to fold the sheets in +their envelopes and make them ready for post. Rhoda read over her +second effort in a glow of virtue, and found it a model of excellence. +No complaints this time, no weak self-pity; but a plain statement of +facts without any personal bias. Her father and mother would believe +that she was entirely contented; but Harold, having been through the +same experiences, would read between the lines and understand the +reserve. He would say to himself that he had not expected it of Rhoda, +and that she had behaved "like a brick," and Harold's praise was worth +receiving. + +Altogether it was in a happier frame of mind that Rhoda left her desk +and took her place in one of the easy chairs with which the room was +supplied. From four to five was a free hour on Sundays, and the girls +were allowed to spend it as they liked, without the presence of a +teacher. + +This afternoon talk was the order of the day, each girl in turn relating +the doings of the holidays, and having her adventures capped by the next +speaker. Thomasina, however, showed a sleepy tendency, and kept dozing +off for a short nap, and then nodding her head so violently that she +awoke with a gasp of surprise. In one of these intervals she met +Dorothy's eyes fixed upon her with a wondering scrutiny, which seemed to +afford her acute satisfaction. + +"Ah!" she cried, sitting up and looking in a trice quite spry and wide- +awake. "I know what you are doing! You are admiring me, and wondering +what work of nature I most resemble. I can see it in your face. And +you came to the conclusion that it was a codfish! No quibbles, please! +Tell me the truth. That was just exactly it, wasn't it?" + +"_No_!" cried Dorothy emphatically, but the emphasis expressed rather +contrition for a lost opportunity than for a wrongful suspicion. "No, I +did not!" it seemed to say, "How stupid not to have thought of it. +You--really--are--extraordinarily like!" + +"Humph!" said Thomasina. "Then you are the exception, that's all. All +the new-comers say so, and therein they err. It's not a cod at all, +it's a pike. I am the staring image of a pike!" + +She screwed up her little eyes as she spoke, and pulled back her chin in +a wonderful, fish-like grin which awoke a shriek of merriment from the +beholders. Even Rhoda laughed with the rest, and reflected that if one +were born ugly it was a capital plan to accept the fact, and make it a +joke rather than a reproach. Thomasina was the plainest girl she had +ever seen, yet she exercised a wonderful attraction, and was infinitely +more popular among her companions than Irene Grey, with her big eyes and +well-cut features. + +"Next time you catch a pike just look at it and see if I'm not right," +continued Tom easily. "But perhaps you don't fish. I'm a great angler +myself. That's the way I spend most of my time during the holidays." + +"I don't like fishing, its so wormy," said Irene, with a shudder. "I +like lolling about and feeling that there's nothing to do, and no +wretched bells jangling every half-hour to send you off to a fresh +class. `Nerve rest,' that's what _I_ need in my holidays, and I take +good care that I get it." + +"I don't want rest. I want to fly round the whole day and do nice +things," said a bright-eyed girl in a wonderful plaid dress ornamented +with countless buttons--"lunches, and teas, and dinners, and picnics, +and dances, and plays. I like to live in a whirl, and stay in bed to +breakfast, and be waited on hand and foot. I don't say I _get_ it, but +it's what I would have if I could." + +"Well, I'm a nice, good little maid who likes to help her mother and be +useful. When I go back I say to her, `Now don't worry any more, dear; +leave all to me,' and I run the house and make them all c-ringe before +me. Even the cook is afraid of me. She says I have such `masterful +ways.'" + +The speaker was a tall, fair girl, with a very large pair of spectacles +perched on the bridge of an aquiline nose. She looked "masterful" +enough to frighten a dozen cooks, and made a striking contrast to the +next speaker, a mouse-like, pinched little creature, with an air of +conscious, though unwilling, virtue. + +"I spent the last half of these holidays with a clergyman uncle, and +helped in the parish. I played the harmonium for the choir practice, +and kept the books for the Guilds and Societies. His daughter was ill, +and there was no one else to take her place, so, of course, I went at +once. It is quite a tiny little country place--Condleton, in +Loamshire." + +"What!" cried Rhoda, and sat erect in her seat sparkling with animation. +"Condleton! I know it quite well. I often drive over there with my +ponies. It is only six miles from our place, and such a pretty drive. +I know the Vicarage quite well, and the Church, and the funny little +cross in the High Street!" + +She spoke perfectly simply, and without thought of ostentation, for her +parents' riches had come when she herself was so young that she had no +remembrance of the little house in the manufacturing town, but looked as +a matter of course upon the luxuries with which she was surrounded. It +never occurred to her mind that any of her remarks could be looked upon +as boasting, but there was a universal glancing and smiling round the +room, and Thomasina enquired gravely: + +"Do you drive the same pair every day?" + +"Of ponies? Oh, yes, generally," replied Rhoda innocently. "They are +frisky little things, and need exercise. Of course if we go a very long +way, I give them a rest next day and drive the cobs, but as a rule they +go out regularly." + +Thomasina shook her head in solemnest disapproval. "That's a mistake! +You should change _every_ day. The merciful man is merciful to his +beast. I can't endure to see people thoughtless in these matters. My +stud groom has special orders _never_ to send out the postilions on the +same mounts oftener than twice a week!" + +There was a moment's pause, and then a shriek of laughter. Girls threw +themselves back in their seats, and held their sides with their hands; +girls stamped on the floor, and rolled about as though they could not +contain their delight; girls mopped their eyes and gasped, "Oh, dear! +oh, dear!" and grew red up to the roots of their hair. And Rhoda's face +shone out, pale and fixed, in a white fury of anger. + +"You are a very rude, ill-bred girl, Thomasina Bolderston! I made an +innocent remark, and you twist it about so as to insult me before all +the house! You will ask my pardon at once if you have any right +feeling." + +"I'm the Head Girl, my dear. The Head Girl doesn't ask pardon of a +silly new-comer who can't take a joke!" + +"I fail to see where the joke comes in. If you are Head Girl a dozen +times over, it doesn't alter the fact that you don't know how to behave. +You have bullied me and made me miserable ever since I came to this +school, and I won't stand it any longer, and so I give you notice!" + +"Much obliged, but it's no use. The rules of this school are that the +pupils must obey the Head Girl in her own department, and there can be +no exception in your favour, unpleasant as you find my yoke." + +"When _I_ am a Head Girl I shall try to be worthy of the position. I'll +be kind to new girls, and set them a good example. I'll not jeer at +them and make them so wretched that they wish they never had been born!" + +Thomasina leant her head on her hand, and gazed fixedly into the angry +face. She made no reply, but there was no lack of speakers to vindicate +her honour. Sneering voices rose on every side in a clamour of +indignant protest. + +"When _she_ is Head Girl indeed! It will be a good time before _that_ +happens, I should say." + +"Not in our day, let us hope. We are not worthy to be under such a +mistress." + +"Oh my goodness, what a pattern she will be; what a shining example! +You can see her wings even now beginning to sprout." + +"Nonsense, child! It's not wings, it's only round shoulders. These +growing girls _will_ stoop. You had better be careful, or you will be +set in order next." + +Rhoda looked across the room with smarting, tear-filled eyes. + +"Don't alarm yourselves; I wouldn't condescend to bandy words. You are +like our leader--not worthy of notice!" + +"Look here, Rhoda Chester, say what you like about us, but leave +Thomasina alone. We will not have our Head Girl insulted, if we know +it. If you say another word we will turn you out into the passage." + +"Thank you, Beatrice; no need to get excited; I can fight my own battles +without your help. This little difference is between Rhoda and me, and +we must settle it together. I think we could talk matters over more +comfortably in my study, without interrupting your rest hour. May I +trouble you, Miss Chester? Three doors along the passage. I won't take +you far out of your way!" + +Thomasina rose from her seat, and waved her hand towards the door. She +was all smiles and blandness, but a gasp of dismay sounded through the +room, as if a private interview in the Head Girl's study was no light +thing to contemplate. + +Rhoda's heart beat fast with apprehension. What was going to happen. +What would take place next? It was like the invitation of the spider to +the fly--full of subtle terror. Nevertheless, her pride would not allow +her to object, and, throwing back her head, she marched promptly, and +without hesitation, along the corridor. + + + +CHAPTER NINE. + +HAVING IT OUT. + +Thomasina led the way into her study, and shut the door behind her. It +was a bare little room, singularly free from those photographs and nick- +nacks with which most girls love to adorn a private sanctum. It looked +what it was--a workroom pure and simple, with a pile of writing +materials on the table, and the walls ornamented with maps and sheets of +paper, containing jottings of the hours of classes and games. On the +mantelpiece reposed a ball of string, a dogskin glove, a matchbox, and a +photograph of an elderly gentleman, whose pike-like aspect sufficiently +proclaimed his relationship. There were three straight-back chairs, +supplied by the school, and two easier ones of Thomasina's own +providing, both in the last stages of invalidism. + +The mistress of this luxurious domain turned towards her visitor with a +hospitable smile. + +"Sit down," she cried, "make yourself comfortable. Not that chair--the +spokes have given way, and it might land you on the floor. Try the +blue, and keep your skirts to the front, so that it won't catch on the +nails. I can't think how it is that my chairs go wrong. I'm always +tinkering at them. Nice little study, isn't it? So cosy!" + +"Ye-es!" assented Rhoda, who privately thought it the most forlorn- +looking apartment she had ever seen, but was in no mood to discuss +either its merits or demerits. It was in no friendly spirit that she +had paid this visit; then why waste time on foolish preliminaries? She +looked expectantly at Thomasina, and Thomasina stood in front of the +chimney-piece with both hands thrust into the side pockets of her +bicycling skirt, jingling their contents in an easy, gentlemanly +fashion. From her leathern band depended a steel chain which lost +itself in the depths of the right-hand pocket. Rhoda felt an +unaccountable curiosity to discover what hung at the end of that chain +and rattled in so uncanny a fashion. + +"Well!" began Thomasina, tilting herself slowly forward on the points of +her flat, wide shoes, "Well, and now about this little matter. I asked +you to step in here because I think differences of opinion are more +easily settled without an audience, and as it were, man to man." She +buried her chin in her necktie, and gazed across the room with a calm, +speculative glance. The likeness between her and the pike-like +gentleman grew more startling every moment. "Now, we have known each +other barely a week, and already I have offended you deeply, and you, +without knowing it, have hit me on a tender spot. It is time that we +came to an understanding. Before going any further, however, there are +one or two questions I should like to ask. You have had time to notice +a good many things since you arrived. You have seen me constantly with +the girls. Do they dislike me? Do they speak of me hardly behind my +back? Do they consider me a bully or a sneak? Should you say on the +whole that I was popular or unpopular?" + +"Popular!" said Rhoda firmly. Whatever happened she would speak the +truth, and not quibble with obvious facts. "They like you very much." + +"And you wonder how they can, eh? Nevertheless it's true. I'll tell +you something more. I'm the most popular Head Girl at Hurst. You ask +the other colours to-morrow, and they'll tell you to a man that you are +lucky to have me. Very well then, Rhoda, who's to blame if you think +the opposite? Yourself, and nobody but yourself, as I'll proceed to +prove. You come to school with a flourish of trumpets, thinking you are +doing us a mighty big favour by settling among us, and that you are to +be allowed to amble along at your own sweet will, ignoring rules you +don't like, graciously agreeing to those you do, and prepared to turn +into a wild cat the first moment any one tries to keep you in order. +Then, when you are unhappy, as you jolly well deserve to be, you turn +and rend me, and say it is my fault. If all the new girls behaved as +you have done, I should have been in my little tomb long ago, and you +would have some one else to deal with. It seems to me, my dear, that +you don't recognise my duties. I am placed in a position of authority, +and am bound to enforce the rules. If the girls are obedient, well and +good; if they kick, well and good also. _I break 'em in_! I'm going to +break _you_ in, Rhoda Chester, and the sooner you realise it the happier +you'll be." + +Rhoda looked at her fully, with a firmness of chin, a straightness of +eye, which argued ill for the success of the project. + +"You will never break me in, as you call it, by domineering, and +treating me like a child." + +"I know it, my dear. I haven't been studying girls all these years +without learning something of character. Some fillies you can drive +with a snaffle, others need the curb. You drive yourself, and +understand what I mean. I can see quite well that you are a proud, +sensitive girl, with a good heart hidden away behind a lot of nonsense. +If it were not for that heart I shouldn't trouble myself about you, but +simply give my orders, and see that they were obeyed. But there's +nothing mean about me, and I'd scorn to take an unfair advantage. Now, +I'll tell you straight that I have come to the conclusion that I judged +you wrongly about that pony business, and that you didn't mean to brag. +I saw by the way you flared out that you were really hurt, and I was +sorry. I've no pity on brag, but when I judge a girl wrongly I feel +sick. If it's any relief to your mind to know it, I believe that little +episode upset me more than it did you. When you said I was not worthy +of my position, and made new-comers wretched, you hit me very hard, +Rhoda, very hard indeed!" + +She stopped short and jingled furiously at her chains, then suddenly +looked up, gave a roguish smile, and cried, insinuatingly-- + +"There, I've done my part. I've acknowledged I was wrong. You are no +coward, so you will do as much! You will admit that you have been a +difficult subject, won't you now?" + +Rhoda looked at her and hesitated. She cleared her throat and +determined to speak openly, and then suddenly, suddenly, something +swelled at her throat, and she heard her own voice say chokingly: + +"I suppose I've been stupid... I've never been accustomed to be-- +ordered about! I'm sorry if I was disagreeable, but I never, never +meant to--give myself airs!" + +"But you did though, all the same," cried Thomasina briskly. "Bless me, +yes! The way you came into a room, the way you walked out, the way you +looked at your food, and turned it over on your plate, the way you eyed +the other girls up and down, down and up--it all said as plainly as +print `I'm Her Royal Highness of Chester, and I won't have any dealings +with the likes of _You_!' If you had been a Princess of the blood you +couldn't have put on more side, and so, of course, we judged your words +by your actions, and thought you were bragging when you meant nothing of +the sort. Now, just make up your mind, like a sensible girl, to forget +your own importance, and don't always be on the lookout for insults to +your dignity. Your dignity will look after itself if it's any good, and +you'll be a heap happier if you give up coddling and fussing over it all +day long. There was that little matter of the pigtail the other +morning! It wasn't my wish that you should tie back your hair. I don't +mind telling you that it's much less becoming than it was, but I was +simply acting as the mouthpiece of Miss Bruce, as you might have known +if you had taken one minute to consider. Your friend, Dorothy What- +ever-she-calls-herself, behaved like a sensible girl, and did as she was +told without making a fuss, but you must needs work yourself into a +fury. You'll have a fit one of these days if you are not careful. You +are just one of those fair, reddy people who are subject to apoplexy, so +don't say I didn't warn you. When we went down to breakfast I tried to +be friendly, just to show there was no ill-feeling, and you went and +starved yourself rather than accept a crumb from my hands. It reminded +me awfully of my little cousin of three. When he is made to do what he +doesn't like, he refuses to eat his bread and milk. He seems to think +he is punishing us somehow; but, bless your heart, _we_ don't mind! We +know he is strong and hearty, and that it will do him no harm to starve +once in a way. I wasn't in the least anxious about you, but I don't +want you to go on feeling wretched in my house, so I'll do my best to +consider your feelings. I warn you, however, I can't stop chaffing. If +I think of a funny thing to say, I _must_ say it or burst, and if you +don't like it you can comfort yourself by thinking that it's for your +good, and will teach you to control your temper. If you get offended +after this, the more fool you, for I tell you straight there will be no +ill-feeling in my mind, nothing but simple, pure buffoonery." + +Rhoda smiled feebly. The cool, unemotional tones of the other had +effectually dried her tears, but the softened expression remained, and +her voice had almost an humble intonation. + +"I'll try. I know I am touchy, but I shan't mind so much now that you-- +that you have explained! I think you have been very generous." + +"All right," interrupted Thomasina briskly. "Don't gush. I loathe +gush. That's all right, then, and I'll tell the girls I was wrong just +now. They will all treat you decently if I tell them to; so behave +sensibly, and don't be a young jackass, and all will be well." + +"I--er, I _beg_ your pardon!" + +"Don't mention it!" Thomasina beamed amiably over her shoulder. +"Jackass, I said--don't be a jackass! The gong will ring in ten +minutes, so you'd better be off to your room. Pleased to have seen you! +Good afternoon. Come again another day!" + + + +CHAPTER TEN. + +HARD WORK. + +From that day forward matters moved more smoothly for Rhoda. Dorothy +reported that Tom had returned to the house-parlour to explain her +regret at having misjudged a new-comer, and her desire that her +colleagues would second her effort to make Rhoda happy, and, as usual, +Tom's word was law. That very evening several of the girls took an +opportunity of exchanging friendly remarks with Rhoda, while at supper +an amount of attention was bestowed upon her plate which was positively +embarrassing. It was a delightful change, but through all the relief +rang the sting of remembering that it had been accomplished by +Thomasina, not herself; that the new friendliness was the result of +Thomasina's orders rather than her own deserts. To her fellow-students +she was still an insignificant new-comer, with no claim to distinction. +If she excelled in one subject, she was behind in the next, while at +games she was hopelessly ignorant. It was wormwood and gall to be +obliged to join the "Bantlings" at hockey, and be coached by a girl of +twelve; but Rhoda set her teeth and determined that if pluck and energy +could help, it would be a short time indeed before she got her reward. +Oh, those first few games, what unmitigated misery they were! The ankle +pads got in her way, and made her waddle like a duck, and when at last +she began to congratulate herself on overcoming the first difficulty, +they tripped her up, and landed her unexpectedly on the ground. +Although she was repeatedly warned to keep her stick down, it seemed to +fly up of itself, and bring disgrace upon her; and then, alas! the ball +followed its example, bounded up from the ground, and landed neatly on +her cheek immediately beneath her left eye. A hideous swelling and +discolouration was the result, but after the first rush to see that the +damage was not serious, no one seemed in the least agitated about the +mishap. Erley Chase would have been convulsed with panic from attic to +cellar, but Thomasina only struck an attitude, and exclaimed, "Oh! my +eye!" and even Miss Everett smiled, more in amusement than horror, as +she cried, "In the wars already, Rhoda? You _have_ begun early." Mrs +Chester would hardly have recognised her darling in the knickerbockered +girl, with her curly mane screwed into a pigtail, her dainty feet +scuffling the ground, and her face disfigured by a lump, which changed +to a different colour with each new dawn. If she could have had a +glimpse of her during that tragic period it is certain that Rhoda's term +at "Hurst" would have been short indeed: but she was not informed of the +accident, while each letter showed an increasing interest in work and +play. Rhoda had put her back into her studies, and worked with an +almost feverish earnestness. The hours of preparation were all too +short, but she found a dozen ways of adding to their length, so that +from morning to night her brain was never allowed to rest. She grew +white and tired, and so perceptibly thin that Miss Bruce questioned her +class-mistress as to the change in her appearance. + +"She is an ambitious girl," was the reply, "and does not like to feel +behind. She is working hard, and making progress; but she never +complains, or appears to feel ill." + +"Oh, well, everything in moderation. See that she is not overworked. +There will be no time gained in that way," said the principal, and +forthwith banished the subject from her busy brain. There came a day, +however, half way through the term, when Rhoda collapsed, and found it +impossible to rise from her bed. Three times over she made the effort, +and three times sank back upon her pillow faint and trembling, and then +in despair she raised her voice, and wailed a feeble "Tom!" + +Tom came promptly, buttoning her magenta jacket, and went through a most +professional examination. + +"To the best of my judgment," she announced finally, "you are sickening +for scarlatina, tonsilitis, and housemaid's knee, but if you stay in bed +and have an invalid's breakfast I should say you would be fairly +convalescent by twelve o'clock. Snoddle down, and I'll see Nurse as +soon as I'm dressed, and put her on the track." + +"I want Miss Everett!" sighed Rhoda plaintively, and Tom gave a grunt of +assent. + +"I expect you do. All the girls want her when they are ill. She's no +time to spare, but I'll tell her, and probably she'll squeeze in five +minutes for you after breakfast. You are not going to die this time, my +dear, so don't lose heart. We shall see your fairy form among us before +many hours are past!" + +Perhaps so. Nevertheless it _was_ good to be coddled once more, to lie +snugly in bed and have a tray brought up with a teapot for one's very +own self, and egg, and fish, and toast--actually toast! instead of thick +slices of bread-and-scrape. The luxury of it took away one's breath. +It was pleasant, also, to have Nurse fussing around in motherly fashion, +and hear her reminiscences of other young ladies whom she had nursed, in +days gone by, and brought back from the jaws of death. From her manner, +it is true, she did not appear to suffer any keen anxiety about her +present patient: but, as Rhoda looked at the empty dishes before her, +she blushingly acknowledged that, after all, she could not have been so +ill as she had imagined. + +After breakfast came Miss Everett, sweet as ever, and looking +refreshingly pretty in her pale blue blouse and natty collar and cuffs. +If one did not know to the contrary, she would certainly have been +mistaken for one of the elder girls, and her manner was delightfully +unprofessional. + +"Well, my poor dear, this is bad news! I _was_ sorry when Tom told me. +What is it?--headache--back-ache--pain in your throat?" + +Rhoda stretched herself lazily and considered the question. + +"A kind of general all-overishness, if you know what that means. I feel +played out. I tried to get up, but it was no use, I simply couldn't +stand. I feel as if I had no back left--as weak as a kitten." + +Miss Everett looked at her quietly, then her eye roved round the room +and rested meaningly on half-a-dozen pieces of paper fastened up in +conspicuous positions. One sheet was tacked into the frame of the +looking-glass, another into a picture, a third pinned against the +curtain, and each was covered with Rhoda's large writing, easily legible +across the few yards of space: Rules of Latin Grammar, List of +Substantives, Tenses of Verbs--they stared one in the face at every +turn, and refused to be avoided. Miss Everett laid her hand upon the +bed, and something rustled beneath her touch. Yet another sheet had +been concealed beneath her pillow. + +"Oh, Rhoda!" she cried, reproachfully; "oh, Rhoda!" + +The girl put on an air of protest. + +"What? There's no harm in it, is there? I can't catch the others up +unless I work hard. I have not enough time in preparation, so I put +these up and learn them while I dress and undress, and every time I come +in to prepare for a meal. You have no idea what a lot I get through. +And I keep a list in my pocket too, and take it out at odd moments. +Miss Murray is surprised at the way I am getting on." + +"I have been surprised too, to see you look so ill, with such white +cheeks and heavy eyes. I understand it now." + +"But, Miss Everett, I _must_ work. I _must_ get on! If I am behind I +_must_ catch up. Even if I am tired I must get on in my class." + +"Why?" + +Why? Why must she get on? It was such an extraordinary question to +come from a teacher, that Rhoda could only gasp in bewilderment--"Why? +You ask _why_?" + +"Yes, I do. One has always some object in work. I wondered what yours +might be. Why are you so terribly anxious to come to the front?" + +A dozen answers rose to Rhoda's lips. To impress Thomasina; to show her +that if I do think a good deal of myself, it's not without a cause... +To take the conceit out of the girls who patronise me. To be able to +patronise in my turn, and not remain always insignificant and +powerless... To show Harold how clever I am, and to have my name put on +the Record Wall when I leave! ... They were one and all excellent +reasons, yet somehow she did not care to confide them to Miss Everett. +Instead, she hesitated, and answered by another question. + +"I suppose you think there is a wrong and a right motive? I suppose you +think mine is the wrong one. What is the right, then? I'm ill, and +reduced in my mind, so it's a good time to preach; I'll listen meekly!" + +"And disagree with every word I say," cried Miss Everett laughing. "No, +no, Rhoda, I never preach. I know girls well enough to understand that +that doesn't pay. There are some secrets that we have to find out for +ourselves, and it is waste of time telling the answers before the hearer +is ready to receive them; only, when one has oneself suffered from +ignorance, and sees another poor dear running her head against the wall, +one is sorry, that's all, and one longs to point out the danger signals. +Find out, dear, what your motive is, and be satisfied that it's a good +one. Meantime, I'm going to take away these papers. Do you see? +Every--single--one!" She walked round the room, confiscating the lists, +and putting them in her pocket with an air of good-natured +determination. "Let that tired head rest, and believe me, my dear, that +your elders understand almost as much about girls as you do yourself. +We are never blamed for under-working at Hurst, and you may take for +granted that the hours for work are as long as you can stand. The short +time spent in your cubicle is not intended for work, but for rest--of +all kinds!" + +Rhoda blushed guiltily. During the first days at school the morning +hymn had been both a delight and stimulus. She had listened to the +words with a beating heart, and whispered them to herself in devout +echo; they had seemed to strike a keynote for the day, and send her to +work full of courage; but, alas! for weeks past the strains had fallen +on deaf ears, and the lips had been too busy conning Latin substantives +to have leisure for other repetition. Her sense of guilt made her meek +under the confiscation of her lists, and pathetically grateful for the +kiss of farewell. + +"Thank you for coming. I know you are busy, but I wanted you so! It's +nice to see you; you look so sweet and pretty!" + +"Oh, you flatterer! I'm surprised at you. As if it matters what a +staid old teacher looked like; I'm above such silly vanities, my dear." + +She looked, however, extremely pleased, quite brisked up in fact, and so +delightfully like a girl that Rhoda took heart of grace, and enquired:-- + +"I wish you would tell me _your_ object! That wouldn't be preaching, +and you are so young to be working so hard! I have often wondered--" + +"Ah!" cried Miss Everett, and a curious look passed over her face--half +glad, half sad, wholly proud. "I'll tell you my object, Rhoda--it's my +brother, Lionel! I have an only brother, and he is a genius. You +remember his name, and when you are an old lady in a cap and mittens you +can amuse other old ladies by telling how you once knew his sister, and +she prophesied his greatness. At school he carried all before him, and +he is as good as he is clever, and as merry as he is good. He won a +scholarship at Oxford, but that was not enough. My father is the vicar +of Stourley, in D--shire, and has such a small stipend that he could not +afford to help him as much as was needed. Then I wrote to Miss Bruce, +and asked her if she could give me an opening. She is an old family +friend, and knew that I had done well in examinations and was good at +games (the younger teachers here must be able to play with the girls-- +it's one of the rules), so she gave me my present position, and I am +able to help the boy. He went up last year and did famously, but I have +had sad news this week. He had been obliged to go home and convalesce +after an attack of influenza, and is so weak still that the doctor says +he will want any amount of rest and feeding up before he can go back. +So you see I am more thankful than ever to be able to help!" + +"I don't see it at all," said Rhoda bluntly. "I should be mad. What's +the good of your slaving here if, after all, he can't get on with his +work? You might as well be comfortably at home." + +"Rhoda! Rhoda! be quiet this moment. It's bad enough to fight against +my own rebellious feelings without hearing them put into words. I won't +stay another moment to listen to you!" + +She gave a playful shake to the girl's shoulder, and ran out of the +room, while Rhoda "snoddled" down to think over the conversation. + +"Well, then, I suppose her motive is love--love for her brother, and-- +er--thinking of him before herself. She comes here and slaves so that +he may have his chance. She is an angel, of course, an unselfish angel, +and I'm a wretch." She lay still for a few moments, frowning fiercely, +then suddenly the bedclothes went up with a wrench--"I don't care--she's +ambitious too! She thinks he is clever, and wants him to be great! +Well, so do I want to be great! If it isn't wrong for one person, it +can't be for another. My motive is _success_, and I'll work for it till +I drop!" + + + +CHAPTER ELEVEN. + +TOM'S EXAMINATION. + +A day in bed renewed Rhoda's energy, and she took up her work with +unabated fervour. The "lists" were, perhaps, less conspicuously +displayed than before, but were none the less in readiness when needed, +and if Miss Everett disapproved, the Latin mistress was all praise and +congratulation. + +"I certainly have a gift for languages, and with lessons during the +holidays I shall soon be steaming ahead," Rhoda told herself proudly. +"I'll ask mother to let Mr Mason coach me. He is a splendid teacher, +and if I have an hour a day I shall learn a lot. Won't the girls stare +when I come back, and go soaring up the class! I shouldn't wonder if I +got a remove. It will be impossible to work up to Thomasina and her +set, but at any rate I'll be past the baby stages, and not disgrace +myself in the examinations." + +All the world seemed bounded by examinations at present. Thomasina and +the elder girls working steadily towards the goal of the "Matric"; +Kathleen and her friends dreaming night and day of the "Oxford"; while +nearer at hand loomed the school examinations, which ended the term. +Rhoda was in a fever of anxiety to acquit herself well in the eyes of +her companions on this occasion, and could think, speak, and dream of +nothing else. Even her joy of getting her remove from the "Bantlings" +into a higher team was swallowed up in the overwhelming interest, while +Dorothy was filled at once with admiration and disgust at the monotony +of her conversation. + +"I don't know, and I don't care!" she replied callously, when anxiously +consulted about a point in mathematics. "I've come out to play, and I'm +not going to rack my brains for you or anyone else. You are getting a +regular bore, Rhoda! It's like walking about with `Magnall's +Questions.' Let's talk about frolics, or holidays, or something nice, +and not worry about stupid old lessons." + +Well! Rhoda told herself, it was no wonder if Dorothy _were_ medium, if +this was the way she regarded her studies. If she took no more interest +than this in the coming contest, what could she expect from the result? +She would be sorry, poor dear, when she saw her name at the bottom of +the list! There was no help to be expected from Dorothy; but Rhoda +stored up a few knotty questions, and took the first opportunity of +asking Tom for a solution. She had discovered that Tom liked nothing +better than to be consulted by the younger girls, and had a tactful way +of asking help in return, which took away the sense of obligation. + +"Oh, by-the-by," she would call to Rhoda, in her elegant fashion, "you +are a bit of a German sausage, aren't you? Just read over that passage +for me. I've been puzzling over it for the whole of the evening," and +then would follow some blissful moments, when Rhoda would skim lightly +over the difficulty, and feel the eyes of the girls fixed admiringly +upon her. + +In the present instance a wet Saturday afternoon afforded a good +opportunity for the desired questioning. The Hurst girls did not stay +indoors for an ordinary drizzle, but this was a downpour of so hopeless +a character that even the most enthusiastic athletes felt that the +house-parlour was preferable to the soaking, wind-swept grounds. They +gathered together, stoked up the fire, and prepared to spend the two +hours' leisure as fancy should dictate, some girls reading, some sewing, +and some making themselves as comfortable as circumstances would permit, +and doing nothing at all with every appearance of enjoyment. + +"If we had only some chestnuts," said one of the lazy ones, "how happy +we might be! I have a wild craving for chestnuts. It came over me +suddenly just now, sitting looking at that fire." + +"I think," said Irene Grey solemnly, "it's very sad, but I do think a +school like this makes one horribly greedy. You get so tired of the +food, and have such a longing for something that _isn't_ wholesome. I +assure you, my dears, there have been occasions when the centre table +has had beef, while we have had mutton, when I could have wept--simply +wept! I should like to order a meal regardless of everything but what I +like--lobster mayonnaise, and salmon, and veal cutlets, and ice pudding, +and strawberries and cream, and fizzy lemonade. That would be something +like a dinner--better than old joints and milk puddings!" + +The girls groaned in sympathy, and Rhoda took advantage of their +absorption to cross to Tom's desk and consult her quietly on the knotty +points. The solutions were remarkably simple--when you knew them!--and +Tom delivered herself solemnly on the subject. + +"You don't think, my dear; you don't reflect. Your brain would help you +out, but you don't give it a chance. It's what I am always saying to +this room--it's not cram you need, it's intelligence! Use your reason! +Cultivate your faculties! Now, then, I'll tell you what I'll do!"--she +raised her voice suddenly, and swung round in her seat. "I'll give you +girls an examination myself. You need some practice before the real +business begins, and it will be just the thing for this wet afternoon. +Get out your books and pencils and I'll dictate the questions. It's to +be a `General Intelligence' paper, and the examiner's instructions are-- +use your wits! They will not be the ordinary blunt, straightforward +questions manufactured by the masculine mind, and intended mainly for +the coarse, masculine ability, but full of depth and subtlety, so that +they will require careful consideration. If you go scribbling down your +answers before you have read the questions, you'll be sorry, that's all; +but don't say you were not warned. Now, then, are you ready? ... We +will begin our studies to-day, young ladies, with a problem in +calculation!" She deepened her voice into such an accurate imitation of +the Arithmetical Mistress as filled her listeners with delight. +"Attention to the board!--If a room were 20 feet long, 13 feet broad, 11 +feet high, and 17 feet square, how much Liberty wall-paper 27 inches +wide would be required to paper it, allowing 5 feet square for the +fireplace and seven by three for the door?" + +The girls wrote down the question, not, however, without some murmurs of +protest. + +"If there is one kind of sum I hate more than another, it's these horrid +old wall-papers!" declared Bertha Stacey. "I shall never be a paper- +hanger, so I don't see why I should worry my head. I don't call _this_ +General Intelligence." + +"I expect we shall have a taste of most subjects; but really, Tom, +really now--the room could not be 17 feet square if your other +measurements were right!" argued Irene, who knew arithmetic to be her +strong point, and was not sorry to impress the fact on her companions. +"You have made a mistake." + +She expected the examiner to be discomfited, but Tom fixed her with a +glittering eye, and demanded if perchance she had _seen_ the room in +question, since she was so positive. + +"No, of course not, but then-- You know quite well--" + +"Well, I _have_, so perhaps you will allow me to know better. Go on, +young ladies, and the next one who dares to raise any objections gets +ten bad marks to begin her list. I must have perfect submission. Five +minutes allowed for working!" + +The time proved all too short for some of the workers, for the less +expert they were the more elaborate became their calculations, until +page after page was filled with straggling figures. Thomasina made a +round of inspection, frowning over each book in turn, protesting, +scolding, marking the result with a big black cross. According to her +verdict everyone was wrong, although five girls had arrived at the same +result; and Irene obstinately disputed the decision. + +"I _know_ it is right! Work it for yourself, and see. It's a simple +enough sum, and any one could tell--" + +"That's apparently just what they can't do! I don't deny that you may +be correct in the broad, vulgar sense, but that is not enough for me. I +expect you to grasp the inner meaning. Now the _real_ answer to this +question is that there can be no answer! To a perceptive mind it would +be impossible to reply without further information. It entirely depends +on how the paper is cut out, and the amount of waste incurred in +matching the pattern!" + +The girls shrieked aloud in mingled protest and delight. It was too +bad; it was ripping, it was mean; it was killing; they all spoke +together and at the pitch of their voices, and alternately abused and +applauded until they were tired. The _denouement_ had taken them by +surprise, though in truth they knew their Head too well to have taken +the examination seriously. When Tom played schoolmistress there was +bound to be a joke in ambush, and they settled down to question number +two with minds alert for a trap. + +"We will now, young ladies, take an excursion into the realms of +Literature, and test your insight into human nature. I will ask you, if +you please, to compare the respective characters of Alfred the Great and +Miss Charlotte Yonge--`Jo March' and Joseph Chamberlain--four great, +and, it will be obvious to all, strongly-defined personalities. I shall +be interested to hear your distinctions!" + +It appeared, however, as if there would be little to interest, for most +of the girls stared blankly into space, as if powerless to tackle such a +subject. Rhoda was one of the few exceptions, and scribbled unceasingly +with a complacent sense of being on her own ground until the limit of +time was reached. Tom had evidently noticed her diligence, for she +called out a peremptory, "Rhoda, read aloud your answer!" which was +flattering, if at the same time slightly alarming. + +"Ahem--er--er--in the historical character of Alfred the Great we find +combined the characteristics of courage and simplicity. He waged a long +and unequal fight, and was equally inspired by failures or success. + +"In the person of Miss Charlotte Yonge we discover the same virtues, but +in a softer and more feminine mould. Her heroes are for the most part +refined and cultivated young men, actuated by the highest motives--" + +"Stop! Stop!" screamed Thomasina desperately. "For pity sake spare us +the rest. Such deadly propriety I never encountered! It reminds me of +the Fairchild family at their very worst. If _that's_ the sort of thing +you are going to write, Rhoda, I pity the poor examiners. And what do +you mean by Alfred fighting? He was a most peaceful creature, so far as +I have heard!" + +"Thomasina! the war with the Danes--all those years! You must +remember!" + +"I don't remember a thing about it. How could a man fight the Danes +living in a peaceful retreat in the Isle of Wight, as Tennyson did +for--?" + +Tennyson! Tennyson! Who spoke of Tennyson? Oh! it was too bad; too +mean! How on earth could anyone be expected to guess that Tom had meant +Tennyson, when she had expressly said Alfred the Great? Rhoda protested +loudly, and the other girls backed her up; but Tom was obdurate. + +"And isn't Tennyson known as `Alfred the Great' as well as the other +crittur? It is just another example of want of intelligence! You read +the words, and never trouble about the connection. Who in their sane +senses would ask you to compare a warrior king with old Miss Yonge? A +little reflection would have saved you from the pitfall into which you +have all fallen headlong. Five bad marks each! Now, then, for the next +two. What have you got to say about the two Joes?" + +Very little apparently. No one had tackled the comparison in Rhoda's +grandiose fashion, but a few pithy sentences were to be found scribbled +on the sides of exercise books. "Jo March was very clever, and my +father says Mr Chamberlain is, too!" from one dutiful pupil. "Jo March +was a darling, and Chamberlain is not," from another of Radical +principles. "Both wore eye-glasses, and wrote things for magazines," +and other such exhaustive criticisms. + +"You are _all_ plucked in Literature," announced Thomasina, solemnly, +"and I am deeply pained by the exhibition! I will give you one more +chance in Arithmetic before going on to the higher branches, because, as +you are aware, this is a most vital and important subject. Write down, +please: A and B each inherited thirty thousand pounds. A invested his +capital in gold-mine shares to bring in eighteen per cent, interest. B +put his money into the Post Office Savings Bank, and received two and a +half per cent. State to three places in decimals the respective wealth +of each at the expiration of twenty-seven years!" + +"Er--with what deduction for current expenses?" queried Irene, with an +air. She had been snubbed once, but was not in the least subdued. +"What were their current expenses?" + +"There were none!" + +"Thomasina, what bosh! There _must_ have been. They couldn't live on +nothing." + +"Well, they did, then. Since you are so particular, I may tell you that +they were in prison! They had their wants supplied by their native +land." + +"I'm not going to do sums about convicts! My mother wouldn't like it," +said Dorothy, shutting up her book with a bang. She leaned forward, and +whispered in Rhoda's ear, "Don't bother; it's only another joke. What's +the use of worrying for nothing?" + +"It's practice," said Rhoda, and away went her pencil, scribbling, +calculating, piling up row upon row of figures. To her joy the answer +came out the same as Irene's, which surely must prove it right; yet, as +Dorothy had prophesied, Tom was once more sweeping in denunciation, +"Wrong! Wrong! All wrong! The gold-mine failed, and left A a pauper, +while B lived happily ever after. You are old enough to know that gold- +mines that pay eighteen per cent, invariably _do_ fail and ruin their +shareholders; or if you don't, you may be thankful to me for telling +you. I must say, young ladies, you are coming exceedingly poorly +through my test. I cannot congratulate you on your insight. I doubt +whether it is any use examining you any further." + +"Oh, yes, let us have the higher branches, Tom! Do let us have the +higher branches! Who knows? Perhaps we may distinguish ourselves at +last. Give us another chance!" pleaded the girls, mockingly; and, thus +challenged, Tom could not but consent. She tackled Zoology, and giving +the three divisions of Plantigrada, Pinnigrada, and Digitigrada, added a +list of animals to be classified accordingly. When it is said that the +list included such widely diverging creatures as "A camel-leopard, a +duck-billed platypus, Thomasina Bolderston, and Spring-heeled Jack," it +can be imagined with what zest the pupils began their replies. + +Tom professed to be mortified beyond endurance to find her fairy tread +unanimously classed under the first heading, and begged the Blues to +take notice that if any girl pined to call her "splay-footed" to her +face she might do so, and take the consequences! No one accepted the +challenge, however; so she proceeded to Latin, and, with much jingling +of keys, gave out a sentence for translation:-- + +"Aequam memento rebus in arduis servare mentem." The girls smiled at +this, confident of their powers. The students at Hurst prided +themselves on their Latin, and could have stood a much severer test +without wavering. The seniors did not trouble to write their answers, +but waited complacently until the time came when they should have an +opportunity of airing their proficiency. It never came, however, for +Tom chose to disappoint expectations by reading aloud her own +translation from her position in front of the fire. + +"Memento--remember; mentem--and mind; servare--to hold up; aequam--your +mare; in rebus arduis--going up hill. That translation, young ladies, +was given by an undergraduate in the University of Oxford. He +afterwards rowed stroke in the 'Varsity boat, and was the best billiard +player of his year, so it would ill become us to dispute his +conclusions. You will observe the valuable moral lessons inculcated in +the words, and, I trust, take them to heart--`Remember and mind--'" + +A laugh sounded from the direction of the door, and there stood Miss +Everett, looking round with mischievous eyes. Rhoda noted with relief +that she looked brighter than for days past, as if some good news had +arrived from the home about which she was so anxious. + +"This sounds improving," she cried, merrily. "Thomasina holding a Latin +class! I am glad you have found such an exemplary way of passing the +afternoon. I am afraid you must stop, however, as the gong will ring in +five minutes, and meantime I must break up the class. I want,"--her eye +roved enquiringly round the room--"I want Rhoda!" + +"Certainly, Miss Everett. Anything to oblige you. Rhoda, my love, you +have my permission to retire," drawled Thomasina, wagging her head in +languid assent, and Rhoda left the room in no little wonder as to the +reason of the summons. + +Arrived in the corridor, Miss Everett laid both hands on the girl's +shoulders, and asked a quick, laughing question:-- + +"What about that hamper?" + +"Hamper?" echoed Rhoda. "Hamper?" Her air of bewilderment was so +unaffectedly genuine that the other's expression became in turn doubtful +and uncertain. + +"Yes, yes, the hamper! The hamper of good things that has just arrived +for my brother. I thought you--" + +"I know nothing about it; truly I don't! I wish I did, but--" + +"But, my dear girl, it came from your home. There was a game label upon +it, with your father's name in print--`From Henry Chester, Erley Chase.' +There cannot be two Henry Chesters living at houses of the same name." + +"Ah!" exclaimed Rhoda, and her face lit up with pleasure. "It's mother! +Of course it's mother! It's just the sort of thing mother would do. I +told her that your brother had been ill, and that you were anxious about +him, and so she set to work to see how she could help. That's just like +mother, she's the kindest dear! I believe she sits down in her armchair +after breakfast every single morning, and plans out how many kind things +she can do during the day." + +"Bless her heart!" cried Miss Everett devoutly. "Well, Rhoda, she +succeeded this time. My mother has written me all about it. It was a +dull, wet day, and Lionel seemed depressed, and there was nothing nice +in the house, and nothing nice to be bought in the little village shops, +and she was just wondering, wondering how in the world she could cheer +him, and manufacture a tempting lunch out of hopeless materials, when +tap-tap-tap came the carrier's man at the door. Then in came the +hamper, and Lionel insisted upon opening it himself, and was so +interested and excited! There were all sorts of good things in it-- +game, and grapes, and lovely, lovely hot-house flowers filling up the +chinks. They were all so happy! It was such a piece of cheer arriving +in that unexpected fashion, and mother says the house is fragrant with +the scent of the flowers. Lionel arranged them himself. It kept him +quite happy and occupied. How can I thank you, dear?" + +"Don't thank me. It was not my doing. It's mother." + +"But how did your mother know where we lived? How did she know who we +were?" + +"Well!" Rhoda smiled and flushed. "Naturally I tell her the news. I +suppose I must have mentioned that your father was Vicar of Stourley. I +don't remember; but then I've so often written about you, and she would +naturally be glad to do anything she could, for she knows you have been +kind to me, and that I'm very--fond of you!" + +Miss Everett bent down quickly, and kissed her on the cheek. + +"And my people knew who Mr Chester was because I've written of you, and +they know that you have been kind to _me_, and that I'm fond of you, +too. Oh Rhoda, you don't know how lonely it feels to be a teacher +sometimes, or how grateful we are to anyone who treats us as human +beings, and not as machines. You don't know how you have cheered me +many a time." + +"But--but--I've been tiresome, and stupid, and rebellious. I've given +you lots of trouble--" + +"Perhaps, but you have been affectionate too, and seemed to like me a +little bit, in spite of my lectures; and if it had not been for your +kind words the hamper would never have come, so I insist upon thanking +you as well as your mother. Many, many thanks, dear! I shall always +re--" She stopped short suddenly, her attention arrested by the scraping +of chairs within the parlour, and concluded in a very different tone, +"The girls are coming! For pity's sake don't let Tom find us +sentimentalising here! Fly, Rhoda, fly!" and off she ran along the +corridor, flop, flop, flop, on her flat-soled shoes, as much in fear of +the scrutiny of the head girl as the youngest Blue in the house! + + + +CHAPTER TWELVE. + +HOME AGAIN. + +The week of examination passed slowly by, and the morning dawned when +the all-important lists were to be read aloud. The girls were tired +after the strain, the teachers exhausted by the work of reading over +hundreds of papers, and it was consequently a somewhat pale and +dejected-looking audience which assembled in the Hall to hear the +report. + +Rhoda sat tense on her seat, and puzzled for some moments over the +meaning of a certain dull, throbbing noise, before discovering that it +was the beating of her own heart. It seemed to her morbid sensitiveness +that every eye was upon her, that everyone was waiting to hear what +place the new girl had taken. When Miss Bruce began to read she could +hardly command herself sufficiently to listen, but the first mention of +her own name brought her to her bearings with a shock of dismay. After +all her work, her care, her preparation, to be so low as this, to take +so poor a place! The mortification was so bitter that she would fain +have hidden herself out of reach of consolation, but to her surprise, so +far from condoling, teachers and pupils alike seemed surprised that she +had done so well. + +"You have worked admirably, Rhoda. I am pleased with you," said Miss +Murray. + +"Well done, Fuzzy!" cried Tom, and even Miss Bruce said graciously: + +"Very good progress for a first term, Rhoda!" + +It was evident from their manner that they meant what they said, and +another girl might have gleaned comfort from the realisation that she +had expected too much of her own abilities. Not so Rhoda! It was but +an added sting to discover that she had been ranked so low, that an even +poorer result would have created no astonishment. She was +congratulated, forsooth, on what seemed to her the bitterest +humiliation! If anything was needed to strengthen the determination to +excel at any and every cost, this attitude of the school was sufficient. +In the solitude of the cubicle she vowed to herself that the day should +come, and that speedily, when she would be estimated at her right value. +She stood in the damp and cold gazing up at the Record Wall, and +renewed the vow with fast-beating heart. The sun struggled from behind +the clouds and lit up the surface of the tablets, and the Honours girl, +and the B.A. girl, and the girls who had won the scholarships, seemed to +smile upon her and wish her success, but Eleanor Newman's name was in +the shade. The sun had not troubled to light it up. She was "stupid," +and had never won a prize. + +The last two days were broken and unsatisfactory, and Rhoda longed for +the time of departure to arrive; yet it was not without a pang of regret +that she opened her eyes on the last morning, and gazed round the little +blue cubicle. It was delightful to be going home, yet school had its +strong points, and there were one or two partings ahead which could not +be faced without depression. How nice it would be if she could take all +her special friends home--Dorothy and Kathleen, and Miss Everett, and-- +yes! Tom herself; for, wonderful to state, she was unaffectedly sorry +to part from Tom. What fun they would have had running riot in Erley +Chase, and summoning the whole household to wait on their caprices! + +The gong rang, and all the little bells followed suit in their usual +objectionable fashion, but the girls yawned and lay still for another +five minutes, aware that leniency was the order of the day. The roll of +the organ and the first two lines of the hymn found them still in bed, +and the words were clearly distinguishable:-- + + Awake my soul, and with the sun, Thy daily course of duty run-- + +"How stupid!" commented Rhoda to herself. "`Course of duty' on the very +day we are leaving school. What a ridiculous choice!" and then she +tumbled out of bed and listened no more. + +The rest of the morning seemed a comical Alice-in-Wonderland repetition +of the day of arrival. The same long queues were formed to march down, +instead of upstairs; the teachers stood on the landings to say good-bye, +instead of welcome; the "Black Marias" bore the pupils to, instead of +from, the station, where the saloon carriages stood waiting as before. +The Blues crowded into one carriage, and Tom seated herself by Rhoda, +and with twinkling eyes called attention to the undulating beauty of the +landscape. It was all exactly the same, yet delightfully different, for +now there was no shyness nor restraint, but the agreeable consciousness +of liberty to chaff in return, and be as cheeky as one chose. + +There was unceasing talk on the journey, yet each girl realised as the +train steamed into Euston that she had forgotten to say the most +important things, and was divided between regret and anxiety to look out +for friends waiting on the platform. Rhoda had heard that Harold was to +meet her, and presently there he was--handsomer than ever, or looking so +after the three months' separation, and as immaculate as if he had +stepped out of the traditional bandbox. + +"There he is! That's Harold! That's my brother!" she cried, with a +thrill of pride in the tall, frock-coated figure; and Thomasina looked, +and rolled her little eyes to the ceiling. + +"What a bee-ootiful young man! A perfect picter! Give him my fond +love, Fuzzy, and say that I am desolated not to be able to stay to make +his acquaintance, but I must make a bolt for my train." + +She seized her bag as she spoke and hurried to the door, prepared to +jump on to the platform at the first possible moment, while her +companions impatiently followed in her wake. Rhoda had a vague +recollection of promising to write regularly to half a dozen girls, and +then she was shaking hands with Harold, and laughing in pure joy at +seeing the familiar face. + +"Here I am! Here I am! I have come back at last!" + +"So I see!" He swept a glance over her, half smiling, half startled. +"Awfully glad to see you. Got your luggage in the van, eh? Don't know +how on earth we shall get hold of it in this crowd. What an--excuse +me!--an appalling set of girls!" + +"I thought so too, at first, but they look different when you know them. +Some of them are sweet, and awfully pretty." + +"Humph!" said Harold, sceptically. "They are not conspicuous. I don't +see a decent-looking girl anywhere, except--who's the girl in the grey +hat?" + +"That's Miss Everett, our house-mistress, the one I'm so fond of--the +one who has the invalid brother, you know, to whom mother sent the +game!" + +"Teacher, is she? I thought she was a pupil. Sorry for her, poor +little thing, if she has to manage a lot of girls like you. Ha! `R.C.' +That's your box at last. I'll get a porter to put it on a four- +wheeler. Watch where I go, and keep close behind." + +He strolled forward, and such was the effect of his imposing appearance +and lordly ways, that the porters flew to do his bidding, and piled the +luggage on the cab, while others who had been first on the scene were +still clamouring for attention. Rhoda glanced proudly at him as they +drove away together, but the admiration evidently was on one side, for +he frowned, and said critically-- + +"You--er--look pale! You have lost your colour!" + +"I've been working hard." + +"You have grown thinner!" + +"Games, I suppose. We are always running about." + +"Er--what has become of your hair?" + +Rhoda first stared, and then laughed. + +"Oh, my pigtail! I forgot that you hadn't seen it. I hated it too, at +first, but I've grown accustomed to it, and find it very comfortable. +It worries me now to have my hair blowing about and tickling my face." + +"All the same, my dear, you had better untie it before we get home. We +will lunch at the Station Hotel, and you can comb it out there. It will +give the mater a shock if she sees you looking so changed. She would +hardly know you, I think." + +The tone of disapproval hit hard, and to hide her chagrin Rhoda adopted +an air of indifference. + +"Oh, we don't trouble ourselves about appearances at Hurst. So long as +we are comfortable we are satisfied. If a girl worries to dress up, we +chaff her unmercifully." + +"The more foolish you! I hope and pray, Rhoda, that you are not going +to develop into one of the strong-minded young women one meets nowadays, +who seem to spend their lives in trying to be as much like men as +possible. It will be a mistake if you do. Be as learned as you like, +and as sensible as you like, and as hardy as you like--that is all to +the good--but, for pity's sake, be pretty too, and dainty, and feminine! +We don't want to have all our womenkind swallowed up in athletes, +warranted to be `hard kicks,' or `useful forwards!' We want them to +play the ornamental part in life, and be pretty, and sweet, and +attractive." + +"Ha, ha, yes! That's the man's point of view!" quoth Rhoda loftily, and +her brother smiled good-naturedly as the cab stopped before the hotel. + +"It is, my dear, that's very certain; and as you will probably meet a +good many men as you go through life, you might as well study their +opinion. It may be regrettable, but it is certainly true, that you will +have more influence if you are agreeable to look at. You would have +more influence over _me_ at this moment if you would kindly walk +upstairs and make yourself look--er--a little more like your old self!" + +"Oh, I don't mind. Anything to please you!" said Rhoda carelessly, and +strode upstairs after the chambermaid, smiling to herself in lofty +superiority at Harold's "dandy ways." She did not smile, however, when, +on coming suddenly in front of the mirror, she caught a full-length +reflection of herself, for her brother's presence had unconsciously +altered her point of view, so that she saw herself no longer from the +standpoint of Hurst Manor, but that of Erley Chase. Yes, Harold was +right! It was not only the pigtail; there was an indefinable difference +in her whole appearance. The clothes were the same, the girl was the +same, but there was no longer the immaculate neatness, the dainty care, +the well-groomed look which had once characterised her. In her usual +impetuous fashion, she had rushed from one extreme to the other; in +discarding vanity, had run perilously near neglect. + +"I look a nasty, horrid, hidjus fright!" she cried aloud, staring in +disgust at the unwelcome vision. "I couldn't have believed it--really I +couldn't! It's the fault of those horrid little cubicles with the glass +stuck in the darkest corner. Harold was right. Mother would have been +shocked." + +She slipped off coat and hat, and with the aid of the well-stocked +dressing-bag went through such a process of dusting, brushing, and +combing-out as she had not known for weeks past. Finally the old Rhoda +seemed to smile upon her in response, in her own eyes at least, but when +Erley Chase was reached some hours later Mrs Chester was far from +satisfied with her darling's appearance. Her anxious eyes took in at a +glance every change in the beloved features, and nothing could shake her +conviction that the child had been starved and overworked. An elaborate +system of coddling was inaugurated, to which Rhoda submitted with +wonderful meekness. + +Oh, the delight at being home again, of being loved and fussed over, and +indulged in one's pet little weaknesses! How beautiful everything +looked; the richly-furnished rooms, the hall with its Turkey carpet and +pictured walls; the dinner table with its glittering glass and silver! +How luxurious to awake in her own pretty room, to hear the fire +crackling in the grate, and to sit up in bed to drink the early cup of +tea! + +"I never realised before how nice home was!" sighed Rhoda to herself, +and for four whole days she succeeded in forgetting all about school, +and in abandoning herself to the enjoyment of the festivities of the +season. + +Christmas Day once over, however, recollections came back with a pang, +and she was all eagerness to begin the proposed lessons with the Vicar. +To her surprise, father and mother looked coldly upon the project, and +so far from admiring her industry thought it a pity to introduce work +into the holidays. It needed a hard struggle to induce them to consent +to three lessons a week instead of six, and she had to face the +certainty that private study would be made as difficult as possible. +Even Harold elevated his eyebrows and enquired, "Why this tremendous +hurry?" as if he had never been to a public school himself and known the +necessity for advance. + +Rhoda betook herself to the faithful Ella in no very gentle mood, and +stormed about the small Vicarage garden like a young whirlwind. + +"Well, I must say grown-ups are the most tiresome, aggravating, +unreasonable creatures that were ever invented! First they want you to +work, and urge you to work, and goad you to work, and `Oh, my dear, it +would do you all the good in the world to compete with other girls,' and +then, the moment you take them at their word and get interested and +eager, round they turn, and it's, `Oh the folly of cram! Oh the +importance of health!' `Oh what does it matter, my dear good child, if +you _are_ a dunce, so long as you keep your complexion!' No, I'm not +angry, I'm perfectly calm, but it makes me _ill_! I can't stand being +thwarted in my best and noblest ambitions. If I had a daughter, and she +wanted to cram in her holidays, I'd be proud of her, and try to help, +instead of throwing hindrances in the way. It's very hard, I must say, +to get no sympathy from one's nearest and dearest. Even your father +looked at me over his spectacles as if I were a wild animal. I thought +he would have been pleased with my industry." + +"He is; I know he is; but he thinks you may overdo it. You know, Rhoda, +you _are_ impetuous! When you take up an idea you ride it to death, and +in lessons that doesn't pay. Slow and sure wins the--" + +"Rubbish! Humbug! It will never win my race, for I have a definite +time to run it in, and not a day more. It has to be a gallop, and a +pretty stiff one at that. For goodness' sake, Ella, don't _you_ begin +to preach. You might be grown-up yourself, sitting there prosing in +that horribly well-regulated fashion." + +"I'm not well-regulated!" cried Ella, incensed by the insinuation. "I +was only trying to calm you down because you were in such a temper. +What is the use of worrying? You have got your own way; why can't you +be happy? Leave the wretched old Latin alone, and tell me about school. +There are a hundred things I am longing to hear, and we have not had a +proper talk yet. Tell me about the girls, and the teachers, and the +rules, and the amusements, and what you like best, and what you hate +worst." + +It was a "large order," as Harold would have said, but Rhoda responded +with enjoyment, for what can be pleasanter than to expatiate on one's +own doings to a hearer with sufficient knowledge to appreciate the +points, and sufficient ignorance to prevent criticism or undue +sensitiveness as to consistency of detail! + +Rhoda told of the chill, early breakfasts, of the seven o'clock supper +when everything looked so different in the rosy light, especially on +Thursdays, when frolics and best clothes were the order of the day; of +Miss Mott, with her everlasting "Attention to the board"; the Latin +mistress, with her eye-glasses; Fraulein, with a voice described by Tom +as sounding "like a gutter on a rainy day"; and of Miss Everett, +sweetest and best-loved of all. Lastly she told of the Record Wall, and +Ella was fired, as every girl hearer invariably was fired, with interest +and emulation. + +When Rhoda went off to her lesson in the study the poor little stay-at- +home recalled the words of Eleanor Newman's inscription, and capped them +by one even more touching: + +"Ella Mason, a student of exceptional promise, voluntarily relinquished +a career of fame and glory to be a cheerful and uncomplaining helper at +home." Alas, poor Ella! at the word "cheerful" her lips twitched, and +at "uncomplaining" the big tears arose and trickled down her cheeks! + +For the rest of the holidays Rhoda worked more persistently than anyone +suspected, with the exception of her tutor, who invariably found the +allotted task not only perfectly accomplished, but exceeded in length. +Even making allowances for the girl's undoubted gift for languages, he +was amazed at her progress, and complimented her warmly at the close of +the lessons, watching with half-amused, half-pitying eyes the flush of +pleasure on the girl's cheeks. + +"You are very ambitious, Rhoda. Very anxious to distinguish yourself?" + +"Yes." + +"Well, well! you are young. It is natural. Remember only that there +are different kinds of success, and aim for the best. When I was your +age I had dreams of a deanery or a bishopric, but I have remained all my +life in this sleepy village. My college companions have soared over my +head, yet I can never feel myself an unsuccessful man. I have had great +compensations, and have discovered that obscurity has many lessons which +I needed badly to learn. Don't be too anxious for honour and glory; +there are other things better worth having!" + +"The worst of old people is--they _will_ preach!" said Rhoda to herself +as she walked home across the Park. "He is a good old thing, the Vicar, +but a terrible bore. Unsuccessful! I should think he _is_ +unsuccessful, with half-a-dozen children, and that wretched little bit +of a house, and a poor stipend. No wonder he gets prosy. Young people +understand young people best, and Miss Everett was quite right when she +said it was no use trying to stuff lessons down your throat until you +were ready to swallow them. If all the fathers, and mothers, and +brothers, and vicars in the world were to lecture me now, and tell me to +take it easy, and not to worry about the examination, it would have no +effect. In another two days I go back to school, and then--then--" She +stood still in the midst of the bare, wintry scene, and clasped her +hands together passionately. + +"Rhoda Chester, you must work, you must win! If you don't do well in +that examination, it will break your heart!" + + + +CHAPTER THIRTEEN. + +"IF I PASS--" + +The Christmas holidays were over, the Easter holidays were over, and +spring was back once more. On the slope over which the new students had +gaily tobogganed two months before the primroses were showing their +dainty, yellow faces, and the girl gardeners were eagerly watching the +progress of their bulbs. Hearing that other plots boasted nothing rarer +than pheasant eye and Lent lilies, Rhoda had promptly written home for a +supply of Horsfieldi and Emperor, which were expected to put everything +else in the shade, but, alas! they were coming up in feeble fashion, and +showed little sign of flowering. "Another year," the gardener said, +"they would do better another year! Bulbs were never so strong the +first season." Whereat Rhoda chafed with impatience. Always another +time, and not _now_! + +Always postponement, delay, uncertainty! Try as she might, checks +seemed to be waiting on every side, and she could never succeed in +distinguishing herself above her fellows. In moments of depression it +seemed that she was as insignificant now as on the day when she first +joined the school; but at other times she was happily conscious of a +change in the mental attitude towards herself. Though still far from +the front, she was recognised as a girl of power and determination; an +ambitious girl, who would spare no work to attain her end, and who +might, in the future, become a dangerous rival. Dorothy had long ago +thrown up the unequal fight, and even Kathleen had moments of doubt, +when she said fearfully to herself, "She is cleverer than I am. She +gets on so well. Suppose--just suppose..." + +With milder weather, cricket had come into fashion, and on the occasion +of the first pavilion tea the Blues turned up in force. Thomasina sat +perched in manly attitude on the corner of the table, where, as it +seemed to the onlooker, every possible hindrance was put in the way of +her enjoyment of the meal. Irene Grey presided at the urn, Bertha +handed round the cups, and a bevy of girls hung over the cake basket, +making critical and appreciative remarks. + +"Bags me that brown one, with the cream in the middle! I've tried those +macaroons before--they are as hard as bricks!" + +"I wish they would get cocoa-nut cakes for a change; I adore cocoa-nuts, +when they are soft and mushy. We make them at home, and they are ever +so much nicer than the ones you buy!" + +"That's what they call plum-cake, my love! Case of `Brother, where art +thou?' like the Friday pudding. Those little white fellows look +frightfully insipid. What Rhoda would call a `kid-glove flavour,' I +should say." + +Every one laughed at this, for it was still a matter of recent +congratulation in the house that Rhoda Chester had invented an +appropriate title for a certain mould or blancmange, which appeared at +regular intervals, and possessed a peculiar flavour which hitherto had +refused to be classified. + +In a moment of inspiration, Rhoda had christened it "Kid-Glove Jelly," +and the invention had been received with acclamation. Did she say she +had never distinguished herself, had never attracted attention? No, +surely this was wrong; for in that moment she had soared to the very +pinnacle of fame. So long as the school endured, the name which she had +created would be handed down from generation to generation. Alas, alas! +our ambitions are not always realised in the way we would choose! When +one has pined to be in a first team, or to come out head in an +examination, it is a trifle saddening to be obliged to base our +reputation on--the nickname of a pudding! + +Rhoda smiled brightly enough, however, at the present tribute to her +powers, and passed her cup for a third supply with undiminished +appetite. She had been playing with her usual frantic energy, and was +tired and aching. Her shoulders bent forward as she sat on her chair; +she shut her eyes with a little contraction of the brows; the dimple no +longer showed in her cheek; and when Bertha upset the tray upon the +floor, she started with painful violence. Her nerves were beginning to +give way beneath the strain put upon them; but, instead of being warned, +and easing off in time, she repeated obstinately to herself:--"Three +months more--two and a half--only two!--I can surely keep up for eight +weeks, and then there will be all the holidays for rest!" + +It seemed, indeed, looking forward, as if the world were bounded by the +coming examination, and that nothing existed beyond. If she succeeded-- +very well, it was finished! Her mind could take in no further thought. +If she failed--clouds and darkness! chaos and destruction! The world +would have come to an end so far as she was concerned. + +It filled her with surprise to hear the girls discuss future doings in +their calm, unemotional fashion; but though she could not participate, +the subject never failed to interest. The discussion began again now, +for it was impossible to keep away from the all-engrossing subject, and +the supposition, "If I pass," led naturally to what would come +afterwards. + +"If I do well I shall go up to Newnham, and try for the Gilchrist +Scholarship--fifty pounds a year for three years. It's vacant next +year, and I don't see why I shouldn't have it as well as anyone else," +said Bertha, modestly, and Tom pounded the table with her heels. + +"Go in, my beauty, go in and win! I only wish you could wait a few +years until I am there to look after you. I am going to be Principal of +Newnham one of these fine days, and run it on my own lines. No work, +and every comfort--breakfast in bed, and tea in the grounds--nothing to +do but wait upon me and pander to my wishes!" + +"I daresay! So like you, Tom! You would be a terror, and work the +girls to death. You are never tired yourself, so you would keep them +going till they dropped. I pity the poor creatures who came under your +rule, but most likely you will never be tried. You may be first +mistress, or second, or third, but it's not likely you'll ever be a +Principal!" + +"It's not likely at all, it's positive sure," retorted Tom calmly. +"Principals, like poets, are born not made, and the cause can't afford +to lose me. I don't say for a certainty it will be Newnham; it may +possibly be Girton, or Somerville, or Lady Margaret Hall, but one of the +two or three big places it's bound to be. No one shall call me +conceited, but I know my own powers, and I intend that other people +shall know them too. Education is my sphere, and I intend to devote my +life to the advancement of my sex. Pass the cake, someone! I haven't +had half enough. Yes, my vocation is among women. You will hardly +believe me, my dears, but men don't seem to appreciate me, somehow! +There is a `Je-ne-sais-quoi' in my beauty which doesn't appeal to them a +mite. But girls adore me. I've a fatal fascination for them which they +can't withstand. There's Rhoda there--she intended to hate me when she +first came, and now she adores the ground I tread on. Don't you, Fuzzy? +You watch her smile, and see if it's not true! Very well, then; I see +plainly what Providence intends, and I'm going straight towards that +goal." + +"And it is what you would like? You would choose it if you had the +choice?" + +"Rather, just! It's the dream of my life. There is nothing in all the +world that I should like so much." + +Pretty Dorothy sighed, and elevated her eyebrows. + +"Well--I wouldn't. I enjoy school very much, and want to do well while +I am here, but when I leave, I never want to do another hour's study. +If I thought I had to teach, I should go crazy. I should like to have a +good time at home for a few years, and then--yes, I should!--I should +like to marry a nice man who loved me, and live in the country--and have +a dear little home of my own. Now, I suppose you despise me for a poor- +spirited wretch; but it's true, and I can't help it." + +But Tom did not look at all scornful. She beamed at the speaker over +her slice of plum-cake, and cried blandly-- + +"Bless you, no! It's quite natural. You are that sort, my dear, and I +should not have believed you if you had said anything else. You'll +marry, of course, and I'll come and visit you in the holidays, and +you'll say to `Him,' `What a terrible old maid Thomasina has grown!' and +I'll say to myself, `Poor, dear old Dorothy, she is painfully domestic!' +and we will both pity each other, and congratulate ourselves on our own +escape. We have different vocations, you and I, and it would be folly +to try to go the same way." + +"You are happy creatures it you are _allowed_ to go your own way," said +Bertha sadly. "I'm not, and that's just the trouble. I'm not a star, +like Tom, but I love work, and want to do some good with my education. +I should be simply miserable settling down at home with no occupation +but to pay calls, or do poker work and sewing; yet that's what my +parents expect me to do. They are rich, and can't understand why I +should want to work when there is no necessity. I may persuade them to +send me abroad for a year or so for languages and music, but even then I +should be only twenty, and I can't settle down to vegetate at twenty. +It's unreasonable to send a girl to a school where she is kept on the +alert, body and mind, every hour of the day, and then expect her to be +content to browse for the rest of her life! Now, what ought one to do +in my position? _I_ want one thing; _they_ want another. Whose duty is +it to give way?" + +She looked at Tom as she spoke, but Tom swung her feet to and fro, and +went on munching plum-cake and staring into space with imperturbable +unconsciousness. Bertha called her sharply to attention. + +"Tom! answer, can't you? I was speaking to you." + +"Rather not, my dear. Ask someone else; some wise old Solomon who has +had experience." + +"No, thank you. I know beforehand what he would say. `Submission, my +child, submission! Parents always know best. Young people are always +obstinate and hot-headed. Be ruled! Be guided! In time to come you +will see'--Yah!" cried Bertha, with a sudden outburst of irritation. +"I'm sick of it! I've had it dinned into my ears all my life, and I +want to hear someone appreciate the other side for a change. I'm young; +I've got all my life to live. If I were a boy I should be allowed to +choose. Surely! surely, I ought to have _some_ say in my own affairs! +Don't shirk now, Tom, but speak out and say what you think. If you are +going to be a Principal you ought to be able to give advice, and I +really do need it!" + +"Ye-es!" said Tom slowly. "But you needn't have given me such a poser +to start with. It's a problem my dear, that has puzzled many a girl +before you, and many a parent, too. The worst of it is that there is so +much to be said on both sides. I could make out an excellent brief for +each; and, while I think of it, it wouldn't be half a bad subject to +discuss some day at our Debating Society: `To what extent is a girl +justified in deciding on her own career, in opposition to the wishes of +her parents?' Make a note of that someone, will you? It will come in +usefully. I'm thankful to say my old dad and I see eye to eye about my +future, but if he didn't--it would be trying! I hate to see girls +disloyal to their parents, and if the `revolt of the daughters' were the +only outcome of higher education I should say the sooner we got back to +deportment and the use of the globes the better for all concerned. But +it wasn't all peace and concord even in the old days. Don't tell me +that half a dozen daughters sat at home making bead mats in the front +parlour, and never had ructions with their parents or themselves! They +quarrelled like cats, my dears, take my word for it, and were ever so +much less happy and devoted than girls are now, going away to do their +work, and coming home with all sorts of interesting little bits of news +to add to the general store. It's impossible to lay down the law on +such a question, for every case is different from another, but I think a +great deal depends on the work waiting at home. If a girl is an only +daughter, or the only strong or unmarried one, there is no getting away +from it that her place is with her parents. We don't want to be like +the girl in _Punch_, who said, `My father has gout, and my mother is +crippled, and it is so dull at home that I am going to be a nurse in a +hospital!' _That_ won't do! If you have a duty staring you in the face +you are a coward it you run away from it. An only daughter ought to +stay at home; but when there are two or three, it's different. It +doesn't take three girls to arrange flowers, and write notes, and pay +calls, and sew for bazaars; and where there is a restless one among +them, who longs to do something serious with her time, I--I think the +parents should give way! As you say, we have to live our own lives, +and, as boys are allowed to choose, I think we should have the same +liberty. I don't know how large your family is, Bertha, or--" + +"Three sisters at home. One engaged, but the other two not likely to +be, so far as I can see, and Mother quite well, and brisk, and active!" + +"Well, don't worry! Don't force things, or get cross, and they'll give +in yet, you'll see. Put your view of the case before them, and see if +you cannot meet each other somehow. If they find that you are quiet and +reasonable they will be far more inclined to take you seriously, and +believe that you know your own mind. That's all the advice I can give +you, my dear, and I'm afraid it's not what you wanted. Perhaps someone +else can speak a word in season!" + +"Well, I side with the parents, for if the rich are going to work, what +is to become of the poor ones like me, who are obliged to earn their +living?" cried Kathleen, eagerly. "Now, if Bertha and I competed for an +appointment, she could afford to take less salary, and so, of course--" + +"No, no! That's mean! I do beg and pray all you Blues that, whatever +you do, you never move a finger to reduce the salaries of other women!" +cried Tom fervently. "If you don't need the money, give it away to +Governesses' Institutions--Convalescent Homes--whatever you like; but, +for pity's sake, don't take less than your due. For my own part, I must +candidly say that when I am Principal I shall select my staff from those +who are like Kathleen, and find work a necessity rather than a +distraction. It seems to me, if I were rich and idle, I could find lots +of ways of making myself of use in the world without jostling the poor +Marthas. I could coach poor governesses who were behind the times, but +couldn't afford to take lessons; I'd translate books into Braille for +the blind; I'd teach working boys at their clubs, and half a dozen other +interesting, useful things. There's no need to be idle, even if one +_does_ live at home with a couple of dear old conservative parents. +Where there's a will there's a way!" + +"But I want it to be my way!" sighed Bertha, dolefully. Like the +majority of people who ask for advice, she was far from satisfied now +that she had got it. + + + +CHAPTER FOURTEEN. + +THE "REVELS." + +One of the Hurst Manor institutions was a whole holiday on the first +Saturday in June, which was technically known as "Revels." The holiday +had been inaugurated partly to celebrate the coming of summer, and +partly as a kindly distraction for the students, who at this season of +the year were apt to be too absorbingly engrossed in the coming +examinations. Old pupils declared that at no other time was the +Principal so indulgent and anxious to second the girls' fancies, while +the particular form of entertainment was left entirely to their +discretion. When the programme was drawn up it was submitted to Miss +Bruce for approval, but, as she had never been known to object, the +consultation was more a matter of form than necessity. + +To Rhoda's surprise, she found her name among those of the General +Committee posted on the notice board, and the delight and pride +consequent thereon diverted her thoughts into a new channel, and were as +good as a tonic to her nervous system. It was a compliment to have been +chosen, for the dozen girls had been drawn from all five houses, and +Irene Grey and herself were the only representatives of the Blues. + +"It's a beauty competition, evidently. Can't think why they haven't +asked me!" was Tom's comment; but Rhoda felt convinced that she had been +selected because of the dramatic abilities which she had exhibited on +more than one of the Thursday "Frolics," and was not far wrong in her +surmise. She had, in truth, a keen eye for effect, a power of +manufacturing properties, and of learning and even inventing suitable +rhymes, which were invaluable in organising an entertainment. + +"And besides," said the Games Captain to her Secretary, "there's her +back hair! She has really admirable back hair!" + +The Committee held their meetings in the study of the Head Green, and +anxiously discussed their programme. On previous years they had held +Gymkhanas and various kinds of picnics, but the ambition was ever to hit +on something so original and startling as to eclipse all that had +previously been attempted. They racked their brains and gazed +helplessly at the ceiling, while the Chairwoman begged for remarks, +after the manner of all Committees since the world began. Then, at +last, someone hazarded a suggestion, someone else took it up and added a +fresh idea; and the ball, once set rolling, grew bigger and bigger, +until, at last, there it was, complete and formed before them! It was a +charming programme--quite charming! They were full of admiration for +their own cleverness in inventing it, and away they flew, smiling and +confident, to consult Miss Bruce in her sanctum. + +The Principal read the sheet handed to her, and the corners of her lips +twitched in humorous fashion. She looked across at the twelve eager +young faces, and smiled a slow, kindly smile. + +"It sounds _very_ charming!" she said; "I am sure it would be most +entertaining, but--would it not involve a great deal of preparation? Do +you think you have realised how much work you will have?" + +"Oh yes, Miss Bruce, but we can manage it easily!" cried the Chairwoman. +"We can get as many helpers as we like in game hours, and you always +allow us an afternoon off to make preparations." + +"Certainly, certainly! You can do nothing without time. Very well, +then, if you think you can manage, I have no objection. You have my +permission to ask the carpenter and gardeners to help you, and if +anything is needed, one of the governesses shall go into town to make +your purchases." + +Nothing could have been more gracious. The Committee gave a unanimous +murmur of acknowledgment, and were immediately smitten with +embarrassment. So long as one has something to say it is easy to retain +self-confidence, but, when the business is finished, the necessity of +saying good-bye and beating a retreat becomes fraught with terror to the +timid guest. The girls felt that it would be discourteous to retire +without speaking another word, but what to say they could not think, so +they huddled together beside the door, and waited to be dismissed, which +they presently were in the kindest of manners. + +"I shall look forward with great pleasure to the performance. Success +to your efforts! You will have plenty to do, so I won't detain you any +longer. Good afternoon!" + +The Committee retired in haste, gasped relief in the corridor, and +promptly set about collecting forces for the furtherance of its aim. +They enlisted the sympathies of the workmen engaged in the grounds, +selected parties of amateur gardeners to supplement their efforts, and +chose the forty prettiest girls in the school to be on the "acting +staff." Each new worker was pledged to secrecy, as surprise was to be +the order of the day, and a certain portion of the grounds was marked +off by placards bearing the announcement that "Trespassers would be +persecuted!" A casual observer might have imagined a slip of the pen in +this last word, but the girls knew better. It would be persecution, +indeed, and of no light nature, which would be visited upon a willing +violator of that order. + +For the next ten days preparations went on busily, both outdoors and in +the various studies. Lessons, of course, could not be interrupted, but +the hours usually devoted to games, added to odd five minutes of +leisure, made up a not inconsiderable total. The onlookers reported +eagerly among themselves that the dancing mistress had been pressed into +the service, and that sundry mysterious boxes had been sent to the +leading members of the Committee from their various homes. Everyone was +agreed that "It" was to be very grand, and they prepared to enjoy the +entertainment in a hearty, but duly critical fashion; for when we +ourselves have not been asked to take part in an enterprise, pride has +no better consolation than to think how much more successful it would +have been in happier circumstances! + +The Committee announced that, should the weather prove unpropitious, a +modified form of the proposed entertainment would be given in Great +Hall, but no one seriously contemplated such a catastrophe. Providence +was so invariably kind to "Revels" that the oldest student could not +recall a day that had been less than perfect, and this year was no +exception to the rule. The air was soft, the sky was blue, the grass, +unscorched as yet by the heat of summer, of a rich emerald green, the +sunshine sent flickering shadows over the paths; it was one of those +perfect days when our native land is seen at its best; and when England +is at her best, go east or west, or where you will, you can find no +place to equal it! Every single inmate of school came down to breakfast +with a smile on her face, for this was a day of all play and no work, +and as the formal entertainment did not take place until three o'clock, +the whole morning remained in which to laze after one's heart's desire. +Even the Committee were so well on with their preparations that by +eleven o'clock they were free to join their friends, and Rhoda looked +eagerly round for Miss Everett. No one had seen her, however, and a +vague report that she was "headachy" sent the searcher indoors to +further her inquiries. She found the study door closed, but a faint +voice bade her enter, and there on the sofa lay Miss Everett with a +handkerchief bound round her head. She looked up and smiled at Rhoda's +entrance, and said immediately: + +"Do you want me, dear? Can I do anything to help you?" + +"So likely that I would let you, isn't it?" returned Rhoda scornfully. +"What is the matter? Is your head bad?" + +"Yes! No! It isn't really so very bad, but one seems to give way when +there is nothing to do. If it had been an ordinary day I should have +gone on with my work, and even played games. I have managed to get +through many a time when I've been worse than this; but it's a luxury to +lie still and rest. I--I'm enjoying it very much!" + +"You look like it!" said Rhoda shortly, noting with sharp eyes the +flushed cheeks, the drops of tell-tale moisture on the eyelashes. "This +room is like an oven, and it will get worse and worse as the day goes +on. Now, it's my turn to order you about, and you've got to obey. Get +up and put on your hat, and come out with me!" + +"Rhoda, I can't! It's cruel! I can't walk about. Do--do let me rest +when I get a chance. I'm _so_ tired!" + +"You are not going to walk about; you are going to rest better than you +could ever do here, so don't worry and make objections. Here's your +hat, and here's my arm, and please come along without any more arguing. +You'll be thankful to me when I get you nicely settled!" + +"_When_!" echoed Miss Everett ungratefully; but she was too languid to +oppose the girl's strong will, so she sat up, put on her hat, and +allowed herself to be led downstairs and into the grounds. The girls +were scattered about under the trees, but Rhoda skirted round the paths +so as to avoid them as much as possible, and presently came to a +sheltered spot, where Dorothy lay swinging to and fro in a most superior +Canadian hammock which had been sent from Erley Chase at the beginning +of the summer weather. She peered over the edge as footsteps approached +and Rhoda cried briskly: + +"Tumble out, Dorothy! I said you could have it until I needed it +myself, and I want it now for Miss Everett. She has a headache, and is +going to rest here until lunch. Now then, I'll shake up the pillows, +and if you don't say it is the most delicious hammock you ever lay in, I +shan't think much of your taste. I'll put up the parasol and tuck it +into the ropes--so!--that you may feel nice and private if anyone +passes. Now then, how's that? Isn't that comfy? Isn't that an +improvement on the stuffy little study?" + +Miss Everett rested her head on the cushion, and drew a long breath of +enjoyment. + +"It's--beautiful! It's perfect. I'm so happy! I never want to move +again." + +"You are not to move until I tell you. Go fast asleep, and I'll promise +faithfully to wake you in time for lunch. We must have you well for the +afternoon, you know. I'd be heart-broken if you didn't see me in my +grand--. Never mind, that's a secret, but you _will_ rest, won't you? +You will be good, and do as you are told?" + +"Kiss me!" replied Miss Everett simply, lifting her dark eyes to the +girl's face with an appeal so sweet that it would have touched a heart +of stone. No sooner was the kiss given, than down fell the eyelids, and +Rhoda crept away realising that sleep, the best of medicines, was indeed +near at hand. She herself spent a happy morning lying flat on her back +on the grass in company with half a dozen other girls, discussing the +affairs of the world in general, the blatant follies of grown-ups, and +the wonderful improvements which would take place when they in their +turn came into power. Rhoda was specially fervid in denunciation, and +her remarks were received with such approval that it was in high good +temper that she went to awaken the sleeper from her two hours' nap. +Miss Everett declared that she felt like a "giant refreshed," had not a +scrap of pain left, and had enjoyed herself so much that if "Revels" +ended there and then, she would still consider it an historic occasion, +which was satisfactory indeed. + +But there was more to follow! There was a great dressing up in the +cubicles after lunch, the girls making their appearance in pique skirts +and crisp new blouses, and rustling into the grounds, all starch and +importance. The "persecuting placards" had been withdrawn, and replaced +by others directing the visitors' steps in the right direction. They +followed meekly, "This way to the Opening Ceremony!" and found +themselves on the south side of the lake, where a semicircle of chairs +had been set for the teachers, and gaily-hued rugs spread on the grass +to protect the freshness of the pique skirts. Here, no doubt, was the +place appointed, but where was the Ceremony? The girls took their +places, and began to clap in impatient fashion, speculating vaguely +among themselves. + +"What's going to happen now? Why do we face this way where we can't see +anything except the lake? There's the landing place opposite--perhaps +they are going to play water-polo? It wouldn't be bad fun in this +weather." + +"I think some one should have been here to receive us. It's rude to let +your guests arrive without a welcome. If I had been on the Committee-- +What's that--?" + +"What? Oh, music! But where--where? It is growing nearer. It's a +violin, and a 'cello--and someone singing. This grows mysterious! Oh, +I say--Look! look to the right! To the right! Oh, isn't it romantic +and lovely?" + +The girls craned forward, and cried aloud in delight, for round the +corner of the lake was slowly coming into view a wonderful, rose- +wreathed barque, with Youth at the prow and Pleasure at the helm, clad +in the most fanciful and quaint of garments. It would have been idle to +assert that this wonderful craft was the old school tub, guaranteed to +be as safe as a house, and as clumsy as hands would make it; for no one +could have been found to listen to such a statement. Garlands of roses +fluttered overhead; roses wreathed the sides, pink linings concealed the +dark boards, and, as for the occupants, they looked more like denizens +of another world than practical, modern-day schoolgirls. The oarswomen +stood at their post, wearing pale green caps over their flowing locks, +and loose robes of the same colour. The musicians were robed in pink, +with fillets of gauze tied round their heads, and underneath the central +awning sat a gorgeous figure who was plainly the Queen of the Ceremony. + +Amidst deafening applause the boat drew up before the landing-stage, +and, while the oarswomen stood to attention, the central figure +alighted, and moved slowly forward until she stood in front of the +semicircle of watchers. + +"It's Rhoda Chester!" gasped the girls incredulously, pinching their +neighbours' arms in mingled excitement and admiration; and Rhoda Chester +in truth it was, transformed into a glorified vision, far removed from +the ordinary knickerbockered, pigtailed figure associated with the name. +A white robe swept to the ground, the upper skirts necked over with +rose-leaves of palest pink; in the right hand she bore a sceptre of +roses, and a wreath of the same flowers crowned her head. Her cheeks +were flushed with excitement, and she bore herself with an erect, +fearless mien which justified her companions' choice. + +When it had become necessary to apportion the _role_ of "Mistress June" +the Committee had unanimously agreed that it would be safest in Rhoda's +hands. She would not quail at the critical moment, mumble her words, +nor forget her duties; but, on the contrary, would rise to the occasion, +and find the audience a stimulus to her powers. + +It was her genius also which had invented the verses for recitation, so +that there seemed a double reason for giving her the place of honour. +So Rhoda had sent home an imperious dressmaking order, and here she was, +dainty as loving care could make her, her flaxen mane streaming over her +shoulders, the sceptre extended in welcome--as fair a personation of +"Mistress June" as one need wish to see-- + + "Friends and companions, and our teachers dear + We give you welcome to our kingdom here. + Once more has kindly summer come to stay, + And Mistress June resumes her wonted sway. + We are your hosts, and to our leafy bowers + We welcome you to spend the sunny hours; + In happy revels we will all unite, + In song, and dance, and ancient pastimes bright; + All cares forgotten, labours laid aside, + Hearts turned to joy, and glad eyes open wide + To watch, as when bright fay and sportive faun + Wove their gay dances on the woodland lawn. + Alas! the stress of higher education + Has vanished these, the poet's fond creation. + But nature--not to be denied--has sent + Yet fairer forms for gladsome merriment, + Who wait my nod. The beauty of the nation + Are gathered here to win your approbation. + But you grow weary--Hither, maidens all, + Forth from your bowers, responsive to my call, + With roses crowned, let each and all advance, + And let the Revels start with song and dance!" + +It was astonishing how well it sounded, recited with an air, and to an +accompaniment of smiles and waving hands. Little Hilary Jervis, the +youngest girl in the school, remarked rhapsodically that it was "Just +like a pantomime!" and the finale to the address was so essentially +dramatic that her elders were ready to agree with her decision. + +Rhoda backed gracefully to the spot where her flower-decked chair had +been placed by her attendants, and having taken her seat, clapped her +hands as a signal to her handmaidens. Instantly from behind the shelter +of the trees there tripped forward a band of pink and green-robed +figures, bearing in their hands garlands of many-coloured roses. The +roses were but paper, it is true, and of the flimsiest manufacture, but +at a little distance the effect could not have been improved, and when +the dance began to the accompaniment of music "on the waters" the effect +was charming enough to disarm the most exacting of critics. It was an +adaptation of the "scarf dance" practised by the pupils, but the +dresses, the circumstances, the surroundings added charm to the +accustomed movements, and there were, of course, deviations from the +original figures, noticeably at the end, when, with a simultaneous +whirling movement, the dancers grouped themselves round their Queen, +holding up their skirts so as to entirely conceal their figures. The +greens were on the outside, the pinks arranged in gradually deepening +lines, and Rhoda's smiling face came peeping out on top; it was evident +to the meanest intellect that the final tableau was intended to +represent a rose, and--granted a little stretch of imagination--it was +really as much like it as anything else! + +This first item of the programme over, the dancers grouped themselves in +attitudes of studied grace, while little green-robed heralds led the way +to what, for want of a more high-flown name, was termed "The Rose +Bower," where various sports and competitions had been organised. Roses +were, indeed, conspicuous by their absence; but there was an archery +ground, an amateur Aunt Sally (clad, one regrets to state, in the garb +of a University Examiner!) and many original and amusing "trials of +skill." Tom came off victorious in an obstacle race, in the course of +which the competitors had to pick up and set in order a prostrate deck +chair, correctly add up a column of figures, unravel a knotted rope, and +skip with it for fifteen or twenty yards, thread a needle, and hop over +the remaining portion of the course; while Dorothy, who held a stick +poised in her hand, called out in threatening tones, "You _would_ pluck +me in arithmetic, would you? Take _that_!" and let fly with such energy +that the "Examiner" fell in fragments to the ground. + +It was a scene of wild hilarity, for even the teachers threw off their +wonted airs of decorum, and entered into the spirit of the occasion, and +to see severe Miss Mott throwing for cocoa-nuts, and fat little Fraulein +hopping across the lawn, were by no means the least entertaining items +in the programme. + +Rhoda sat enthroned on her rose-wreathed chair, looking on at the +revels, well content with idleness since it was the badge of +superiority. The pleasantest part of her duties was still to come, and +the girls realised for what purpose the sixpence-a-head contribution had +been levied by the Games Captains, as they saw the prizes which were +awarded the successful competitors. No one-and-eleven-penny frames this +time; no trashy little sixpence-three-farthing ornaments; nor shilling +boxes supplied with splinty pencils and spluttering pens; but handsome, +valuable prizes, which any girl might be proud to possess. Dorothy was +presented with an umbrella with a silver handle; another lucky winner +received the most elegant of green leather purses, with what she +rapturously described as "scriggles of gold" in the corners; Tom won a +handsome writing-case, and a successful "Red" the daintiest little gold +bangle, with six seed pearls encircling a green stone, concerning the +proper name of which it was possible to indulge in endless disputations. + +Rhoda was in her element distributing these gifts, and afterwards in +leading the way towards the pavilion, which had been transformed into a +veritable bower by the hands of willing workers, and in which were +displayed a supply of the most luxurious refreshments. Miss Bruce had +contributed generously towards the afternoon's entertainment, and as the +girls sat about upon the grass, and were waited upon by the "Rose +Maidens," no one had need to sigh in vain for "something nice." The +choice of good things was quite bewildering, and little Hilary Jervis +was reported to have reverted twice over from coffee to lemonade, and to +have eaten an ice-cream and a ham sandwich in alternate bites. She was +blissfully happy, however, and so was everyone else, and when at last +Mistress June returned to her Barque, and the singers started the first +notes of "Good Night," two hundred voices took up the strain with a +strength and precision which made the unrehearsed effect one of the most +striking in the programme. + +And so ended "Revels"--the happiest day which many of the students were +to know for long weeks to come. + + + +CHAPTER FIFTEEN. + +DRAWING NEAR. + +A week after "Revels" had taken place the very remembrance seemed to +have floated away to an immeasurable distance, and only wonder remained +that any interest could have been felt on so trivial a subject. From +morning to night, and from night till morning, the same incessant grind +went on, for of what rest was sleep when it opened the door for fresh +torture, as, for instance, when a Cambridge Examiner condescended to the +unfair expedient of kidnapping a candidate's wardrobe, leaving her to +decide between the alternative of staying at home or attending the +examination room attired in a _robe de nuit_? On other occasions it +appeared that by some unaccountable freak of memory one had forgotten +about the examinations until the very hour had arrived, and was running, +running--trying to overtake a train that would _not_ stop, not though +one leapt rivers and scaled mountain heights in the vain attempt to +attract attention! It was really more restful to lie awake and study +textbooks by the morning light, which came so early in these summer +days; or so thought Rhoda, as she sat up in bed and bent her aching head +over her task. Her head was always aching nowadays, while occasionally +there came a sharp, stabbing pain in the eyes, which seemed to say that +they, too, were inclined to rebel. It was tiresome, but she had no time +to attend to them now. It was not likely that she was going to draw +back because of a little pain and physical weakness. + +She never complained, but amidst all the bustle of preparation the +teachers kept a keen eye on their pupils, and Rhoda found more than one +task mysteriously lightened. No remark was made, but Miss Mott reduced +the amount of preparation; Miss Bruce sent an invitation to tea, which +involved an idle hour, and shortcomings were passed over with wonderful +forbearance. Only Miss Everett "croaked," and, dearly as she loved her, +Rhoda was glad to keep out of Miss Everett's way just now. It was +unpleasant to be stared at by "eyes like gimlets," to be asked if one's +head ached, and warned gravely of the dangers of overwork. + +"When I went up for the Cambridge Senior," began Miss Everett, and the +girl straightened herself defiantly, on the outlook for "sermons." + +"When I went up for the Cambridge Senior I was not at school like you, +but studying at home with a tutor. My sister was delicate, so an old +college friend of my father's came to us for three hours a day. He was +delightful--a very prince of teachers--and we had such happy times, for +he entered into all our interests, and treated our opinions with as much +respect as if we had been men like himself. I remember disputing the +axioms of political economy, and arguing that a demand for commodities +_must_ be a demand for labour, and the delight with which he threw back +his head and laughed whenever I seemed to score a point. Instead of +snubbing me, and thinking it ridiculous that I should presume to dispute +accepted truths, he welcomed every sign of independent thought; and +there we would sit, arguing away, two girls of fifteen and sixteen and +the grey-headed man, as seriously as if history depended on our +decision. Later on, when I was going in for the examination, I joined +some of his afternoon classes at a school near by, so that I could work +up the subjects with other candidates. There was one girl in the class +called Mary Macgregor, a plain, unassuming little creature, who seemed +most ordinary in every way. When I first saw her I remember pitying her +because she looked so dull and commonplace. My dear, she had a brain +like an encyclopaedia!--simply crammed with knowledge, and what went in +at one ear stayed there for good, and never by any chance got mislaid. +You may think how clever she was when I tell you that she passed first +in all England, with distinction in every single subject that she took. +She won scholarships and honours and went up to Girton, and had posts +offered to her right and left, and practically established herself for +life. Well, to go back a long way, to the week before the Cambridge. +We had preliminary examinations at school, and had worked so hard that +we were perfectly dazed and muddled. Then one day `Magister,' as we +called him, marched into the room to read the result of the arithmetic +paper. I can see him now, standing up with the list in his hands, and +all the girls' faces turned towards him. Then he began to read: `Total +number of marks, one hundred. Kate Evans, eighty-nine; Sybil Bruce, +eighty-two; Hilda Green, seventy-one;' so on and so on--down, and down +and down until it came to thirties and twenties, and still no mention of +Mary or of me! The girls' faces were a study to behold. As for the +`Magister' he put on the most exaggerated expression of horror, and just +hissed out the last few words--`Laura Everett, _twelve_! Ma-ry Mac-gre- +gor, _ten_!' We sat dumb, petrified, frozen with dismay, and then +suddenly he banged his book on the table and called out, `No more +lessons! No more work! I forbid any girl to open a book again before +Monday morning. Off you go, and give your brains a rest, if you don't +wish to disgrace yourselves and me. Give my compliments to your +mothers, and say I wish you _all_ to be taken to the Circus this +evening.' He nodded at us quite cheerfully, and marched out of the room +there and then, leaving us to pack up our books and go home, Mary and I +cried a little, I remember, in a feeble, helpless sort of way; but we +were too tired to care very much. I slept like a log all the afternoon, +and went to the Circus at night, and the next day I skated, and on +Saturday spent the day in town, buying Christmas presents, and by Monday +I was quite brisk again, and my mind as clear as ever. I have often +thought how differently that examination might have turned out for Mary +and for me if we had had a less wise teacher, who had worked himself +into a panic of alarm, and made us work harder than ever, instead of +stopping altogether! I am convinced that it was only those few days of +rest which saved me." + +"There!" cried Rhoda, irritably; "I knew it! I _knew_ there was a +moral. I knew perfectly well the moment you began, that it was a +roundabout way of preaching to me. If I am to have a sermon, I would +rather have it straight out, not wrapped up in jam like a powder. I +suppose you think my brain is getting muddled, but it would go +altogether if I tried to do nothing but laze about. I should go stark, +staring mad. I must say, Evie, you talk in a very strange way for a +teacher, and are not at all encouraging. I don't think you care a bit +whether I get the scholarship or not." + +"Yes, I do! I hope very much that you will _not_! Wait a moment now; I +am very fond of you, Rhoda; and I hope with all my heart that you will +pass, and pass well--I shall be bitterly disappointed if you don't; but +I want Kathleen to get the scholarship. She _needs_ it, and you don't; +it means far, far more to her than you can even understand." + +"In one way, perhaps--not another! She wants the money, which she could +have in any case; but she is not half so keen as I am for the honour +itself--and, after all, that's the first thing. I can't do anything in +a half-and-half way, and now that I have taken up examinations I am just +burning to distinguish myself. It would be a perfect bliss, the height +of my ambition, to come out first here, and go up to Oxford, and take +honours, and have letters after one's name, and be a distinguished +scholar, written about in the papers and magazines like--like--" + +"Yes! Like Miss Mott, for instance. What then?" Rhoda stood still in +the middle of her tirade, and stared at the speaker with startled eyes. +_Miss Mott_! No, indeed, she had meant nobody in the least like Miss +Mott. The very mention of the name was like a cold douche on her +enthusiasm. The creature of her dream was gowned and capped, and moved +radiant through an atmosphere of applause. Miss Mott was a commonplace, +hard-working teacher, with an air of chronic exhaustion. When one +looked across the dining-room, and saw her face among those of the +girls, it looked bleached and grey, the face of a tired, worn woman. +"The idea of working and slaving all one's youth to be like--Miss Mott!" +Rhoda exclaimed contemptuously, but Miss Everett insisted on her +position. + +"Miss Mott is a capital example. You could not have a better. She was +the first student of her year, and carried everything before her. Her +position here is one of the best of its kind, for she is practically +headmistress. She would tell you herself that she never expected to do +so well." + +"I think it's very mean of you, Evie, to squash me so! It's most +discouraging. I don't want to be the _least_ like Miss Mott, and you +know it perfectly well. It's no use talking, for we can't agree; and +really and truly you are the most unsympathetic to me just now." + +Miss Everett looked at her steadily, with a long, tender gaze. + +"I _seem_ so, Rhoda, I know I do, but it is only seeming. In reality +I'm just longing to help you, but, as you say, you think one thing and I +think another, so we are at cross purposes. Come and spend Sunday +afternoon with me in my den, dear, and I'll promise not to preach. I'll +make you so comfy, and show you all my photographs and pretty things, +and lay in a stock of fruit and cakes. Do; it will do you good!" + +But Rhoda hesitated, longing, yet fearing. + +"I'd love it; it would be splendid, but--there's my Scripture! I want +to cram it up a little more, and Sunday afternoon is the only chance. +I'm afraid I can't until after the exam., Evie, dear. I need the time." + +"A wilful lass must have her way!" quoted Miss Everett with a sigh, and +that was the last attempt which she made to rescue Rhoda from the result +of her own rash folly. Henceforth to the end the girl worked +unmolested, drawing the invariable "list" from her pocket at every odd +moment, and gabbling in ceaseless repetition, nerved to more feverish +energy by the discovery that her brain moved so slowly that it took +twice as long as of yore to master the simplest details. She felt +irritable and peevish, disposed to tears on the slightest provocation, +and tired all over, back and limbs, aching head, smarting eyes, weary, +dissatisfied heart. Did every ambition of life end like this? Did it +always happen that when the loins were girded to run a race, depression +fell like a fetter, and the question tortured: "Is it worth while? Is +it worth while?" What was the "right motive" of which Evie had spoken? +What was the Vicar's meaning of "success"? They, at least, seemed to +have found contentment as a result of their struggles. Rhoda groped in +the dark, but found no light, for the door was barred by the giant of +Self-Will. + + + +CHAPTER SIXTEEN. + +THE EXAMINATION. + +Four o'clock on the morning of Examination Monday. The clock on the +wall chimed the hour, and Rhoda awoke with a start, and sat up wearily +in bed. The pale, grey light already filled the room, and the birds +clamoured tumultuously in the trees outside. Three hours before the +gong rang--the last, the very last chance of preparing for the fray! + +She slipped noiselessly out of bed, sponged her face with cold water, +seized the eau-de-Cologne in one hand and a pile of books in the other, +and settled herself against a background of cushions. There was silence +in the room, broken only by fitful cries from Dorothy, who was given to +discoursing in her sleep, and more than once in the course of the first +half-hour Rhoda's own eyes glazed over, and the lids fell. Nature was +pleading for her rights, but each lapse was sternly overcome, and +presently nerves and brain were fully awake, and battling with their +task. She learned by heart passages marked as likely to be useful, +searched to and fro for answers still unknown, and worked out imaginary +calculations. One thing was no sooner begun than she recalled another +which needed attention, and so on it went from arithmetic to +Shakespeare, from Shakespeare to history, from history to Latin, back +and forward, back and forward, until her head was in a whirl. + +The clock struck six, the girl in the next cubicle murmured sleepily, +"Such a noise! Something rustling!" and Rhoda held her breath in +dismay. Her haste in turning over the leaves had nearly brought about +discovery, but henceforth she moved with caution, turning from place to +place with wary fingers. Her back ached despite the supporting +cushions, and her head swam, but she struggled on until at last the roll +of the gong sounded through the house, and the girls awoke with yawns +and groans of remembrance. + +"Black Monday! Oh! Oh! I wish I'd never been born!" + +"Misery me, and I was having such a lovely dream, all about holidays and +picnics, and walks on the sands--" + +"I've had the most awful night, doing sums all the time, with the +Examiner looking over my shoulder. My head is like a jelly!" + +Then Tom's voice arose in derisive accents. Happy Tom! who was well +through her June Matric, and could afford to chaff the poor victims. + +"Would any young lady like to explain to me how to find the resultant of +a system of parallel forces?" + +"Tom, you are brutal! Be quiet this moment, or we'll come and make +you--" + +"Ha! Ha! Ha! Rhoda, love, just give me the Substance of King +Richard's speech to Northumberland, when the latter announced that he +was to be removed to Pomfret!" + +Rhoda began to reply, but stopped abruptly, for on rising from bed she +was attacked by a strange giddiness, and lay back against the pillows +trembling with cold and nausea. Her hands shook as she uncorked the +eau-de-Cologne, and the scent, so far from being reviving, made her +shudder afresh. She dressed with difficulty, sitting down at frequent +intervals, and growing colder and colder with each exertion, so that +when she emerged from her cubicle her pallid face roused Tom's instant +attention. + +"Rhoda, you are ill!" she cried, her chaffing manner changing at once, +as she realised the seriousness of the occasion. "What's the matter? +Didn't you sleep? Let me feel your hand--. Goodness, what a frog! You +had better lie down, and let me send for nurse." + +"No, thank you, Tom, _please_! It's only excitement. I shall be better +after breakfast. Please, please, don't make a fuss!" + +"Humph!" said Tom shortly, "just as you like. If you feel yourself +going, stoop down and pretend to fasten your shoe, and give a scrub to +your cheeks before passing Miss Bruce. She'll spot you in a moment if +you go in with a face like that." + +Thus adjured, Rhoda "scrubbed her cheeks" all the way downstairs, and +looked so rosy as she passed the Principal that the good lady felt much +relieved. She had had some anxious thoughts about Rhoda Chester of +late, and was only too glad to feel that her anxiety had been needless; +but, alas! three times over during breakfast did Rhoda stoop down to +button her shoe, and in vain did her companions press food upon her. A +sumptuous breakfast had been served in honour of the occasion, but ham +and eggs seemed just the last things in the world that she wanted to +eat, while the sight of fried fish took away the last remnant of +appetite. She drank her tea, trying to laugh with the rest, and to take +no notice of the swaying movement with which the walls whirled round +from time to time, or of the extraordinary distance from which the +girls' voices sounded in her ears. + +"She's game! She's real game!" said Tom to herself, watching the set +face with her sharp little eyes, "but she's uncommon bad all the same. +I'll put Evie on her track!" So Miss Everett's attention was duly +called to the condition of her pupil, and Rhoda was dosed with sal- +volatile, and provided with smelling salts to keep in her pocket. Not a +word of reproach was spoken, and Evie indeed appeared to treat the +indisposition as quite an orthodox thing under the circumstances. So +affectionate was she, so kind and cheery, and so thoughtful were the +girls in giving up the best seats in omnibus and train, and in offering +supporting arms along platforms, that Rhoda felt inclined to cry with +mingled gratitude and remorse. + +When the hall was reached in which the examination was to be held, she +had yet another dose of sal-volatile as a preparation for the ordeal of +the arithmetical paper, and then, gathering up pens and pencils, marched +slowly into the dreaded room. It was shaped like an amphitheatre, with +a railed-in platform at one side, and sloping seats descending all +round. + +"It's like the operating theatre at a hospital! Oh my! and don't I feel +as if I were going to be cut up too!" groaned Dorothy, as she filed +along in front of a seat, looking for her place. At a distance of every +two or three yards the desks were marked with a number, in front of +which was a supply of blotting and writing paper. Some of the +candidates made out their own number at once, others went roaming +helplessly about, and Rhoda found herself perched in the furthest +corner, far from her companions. She looked across and received +Dorothy's smiling nod, but Kathleen's face was set in stern anxiety, and +the others were too busy arranging papers to remember her existence. +The Examiner, in cap and gown, stood on the platform, talking to the +lady secretary of the Centre. She made a remark, and he smiled, and +said something in reply at which they both laughed audibly. It shocked +Rhoda in much the same way as it would have done to hear a chief mourner +laugh at a funeral. Such levity was most unseemly, yet on the other +hand the pictures on the walls were surely unnecessarily depressing! +They were oil-coloured portraits of departed worthies, at that gloomy +stage of decay when frame, figure, and background have acquired the same +dirty hue, and the paint has cracked in a hundred broken lines. One old +gentleman--the ugliest of all--faced Rhoda as she sat, and stared at her +with a mocking gaze, which seemed to say: + +"You think you are going to pass in arithmetic, do you? Wait until you +see the paper! _You'll_ be surprised--!" + +It was a relief to turn to the paper itself and know the worst, which +seemed very bad indeed. She glanced from question to question, feeling +despair deepen at the sight of such phrases as--"Simplify the +expression"; "debenture stock at 140 1/8"; "at what rate per cent.?" +etcetera, etcetera. In the present condition of mind and body it was an +effort to recall the multiplication table, not to speak of difficult and +elaborate calculations. Poor Rhoda! She dipped her pen into the ink, +and wrote the headline to her paper, hesitated for a moment, added +"Question A," and then it seemed as if she could do no more. The +figures danced before her eyes, her knees shook, her hands were so +petrified with cold that she clasped them together to restore some +feeling of warmth, and the faintness of an hour ago seemed creeping on +once more. She leant her elbows on the desk, bowed her hands in her +head, and remained motionless for ten minutes on end. The other girls +would think that she was studying the paper, and deciding what question +she could best answer; but in reality she was fighting the hardest +battle of her life, a battle between the Flesh, which said, "Give in; +say you are too ill! Think what bliss it would be to lie down and have +nothing to do!" and the Will, which declared, "No, never! I must and +shall go on. Brain! Hands! Eyes! you are my servants. I will not +_let_ you fail!" In the end Will conquered, and Rhoda raised her face, +pale to the lips, but with determination written on every feature. + +The girl next to herself had covered half the sheet with figures, and +was ruling two neat little lines, which showed that Question A was +satisfactorily settled. All over the room the girls were scribbling +away, alert and busy; there was plainly no time to be wasted, and Rhoda +began slowly to puzzle out the easiest problem. The answer seemed +inappropriate; she tried again, with a different result; a third time, +with a third result; then the firm lips set, and she began doggedly the +fourth time over. To her relief this answer was the same as number two, +so it was copied out without delay, and the next puzzle begun, and the +next, and the next. + +Oh, the weariness of those two hours, the struggle against weakness, the +moments of despair when memory refused to work, and simplest facts +evaded her grasp! Nobody ever knew all that it meant, and as she had +the presence of mind to tear up her blotting-paper, no examining eyes +were shocked by the sight of the expedients to which a senior candidate +had been reduced in order to discover the total of six multiplied by +six, or eight plus eleven. There were other moments, however, when the +brain cleared and allowed a space for intelligent work. More faintness +came on again, and at the end she could announce to her companions that +she had answered nine out of the twelve questions. + +"What did you get for the square root?" enquired Kathleen anxiously. +"Irene's answer was different from mine; but I _did_ think I was right. +I went over it twice!" + +The girls were all surging together in the ante-room, comparing answers, +and referring eagerly to Irene, who read aloud her own list with a self- +satisfied air. Those whose numbers agreed with hers announced the fact +with whoops of joy, those who had differed knitted their brows and were +silent. Kathleen looked worried and anxious, and could not think what +she had been about to get "that decimal wrong." + +"But it was horrible, wasn't it? The worst we have had." + +"The wall-paper was vile," cried another voice indignantly. "_Toujours_ +wall-paper! They might have a little originality, and think of +something else. I longed to give Tom's answer!" + +"It wasn't really difficult, but tricky! Decidedly tricky!" said Irene, +with an air. She could afford to be superior, for there was no doubt +that she had passed! and passed well. "The square root was absurdly +easy." Then her eye fell on Rhoda, and she asked, kindly enough, "What +did you make it, Rhoda? I hope you got on all right, and feel better." + +"Thanks, yes; but I didn't put down my answers. I really can't remember +what they were." + +"And a good thing too! You have done your best, so don't worry over it +any more, but come along to lunch!" cried Miss Everett, cheerily; and +the girls obeyed with willing haste, for it was one of the "treats" of +examination time to lunch in a restaurant, and be allowed to order what +one chose. + +Rhoda was so much revived by the walk and the joy of knowing the ordeal +over that she was able to eat a morsel of chicken, but the fascinations +of jam puffs had departed for the time being, and she could even look +unmoved at the spectacle of a dozen strawberry ices in a row. + +"If every candidate indulges in an ice a day, state accurately the +number of bushels of fruit--" began Dorothy, with her mouth full of +Vanilla biscuit, but she was promptly elbowed into silence; no one being +in the mood for further calculations just then. + +For the next four days the examination dragged its weary course, and +Rhoda was carefully nursed and coddled so as to be able to stand the +strain. She was sent to bed immediately on her return from the train; +was not allowed to rise until eight o'clock; was dosed with nurse's pet +tonic, and with Bovril and sandwiches between the papers, and for once +she was sufficiently conscious of past errors to acknowledge that Nature +could not be defied, and to attempt no more four o'clock preparation +classes. On the whole she got through fairly well, growing stronger +each day, and even feeling occasional bursts of exultation at the +conclusion of a paper which might have been written especially for her +benefit. What rapture to be questioned about those very rules in French +grammar which one had rubbed up the week before; to have pet passages +selected from Shakespeare, and find the Latin prose for translation +become gradually intelligible, as one telling substantive gave the clue +to the whole! Once assured of the meaning, it was easy to pick out the +words, skimming lightly over difficult phrases, but making a great show +of accuracy when opportunity arose. As to the elegance of the +translation from English into Latin the less said the better, but even +with a realisation of its shortcomings, Rhoda was hopeful of the result. + +"They will say, `She doesn't know much, poor thing, but she has worked +hard, and deserves to pass. Her grammar is good, and she has mastered +the books. Oh, yes; certainly she has enough marks to pass.'" + +"I think I have done fairly well in Latin," she told Miss Mott on her +return, and that severe lady actually smiled, and said graciously: + +"I hope you have. You have certainly worked with a will." + +Miss Bruce, however, was not nearly so encouraging, and her last +interview with her pupil was somewhat in the nature of a cold douche. + +"Now that the week is over, Rhoda," she said, "I must tell you that I +have felt a good deal of anxiety on your account, which I would not +willingly have repeated. There is a strain about examinations which +some girls feel more than others. The head of your house, for instance, +Thomasina Bolderston, is a capital subject, and seems able to hit the +happy medium between working hard and over-working; but you appear to +suffer physically from the strain. I thought you seemed ill even before +the breakdown on Monday, and I fear your parents will be far from +satisfied with your looks. In the case of a girl who is preparing to +earn her livelihood, and to whom certificates are all-important, one +must take all reasonable precautions and then face the risk; but with +you it is different. You are the only daughter of wealthy parents, and +as, in all probability, you will never need to work for yourself, it +would be wiser to content yourself with taking the ordinary school +course and leaving examinations alone. I shall feel it my duty to +acquaint your mother with my opinions, and to advise--" + +Rhoda gave a gasp of dismay, and stared at her with horrified eyes. + +"You will forbid me to go in for any more exams.! You won't allow me to +try again?" + +The Principal smiled slightly. + +"That is, perhaps, over-stating the case. The final decision must, of +course, rest with your parents. If, in opposition to my advice, they +should still desire--" + +But Rhoda heard no more. The idea that her father and mother should +wish her to go in for any work which interfered with health was so +impossible to conceive that it might as well be dismissed at once. With +one fell crash her castle in the air had fallen to the ground and lay in +ruins at her feet. If she had not done well this time, farewell for +ever to her dreams of distinction, for no other opportunity would be +granted! + +For the first half of the holidays the thought weighed upon her with +depressing force, but gradually, as health improved, the outlook +lightened also, and she began to pose to herself in a new light. If she +passed well--and, despite her illness, she looked back on most of the +papers with a feeling of complacency--if she won the scholarship, or +even gained distinction, her reputation among her class-mates would be +to a certain extent established, and the fact that the delicate nature +of her nervous system debarred her from further efforts would entitle +her to a tribute of peculiar sympathy. When other girls succeeded, +their companions would shake their heads, and whisper among themselves, +"If Rhoda could only--" + +"A good thing for her that Rhoda," etcetera, etcetera. In imagination +she could hear the remarks, and her face unconsciously assumed the +expression of meek endurance with which she would listen. And so more +and more did the result of that week's work fill the horizon of her +life; she thought of it day by day, and dreamt of it by night; she +talked of it to Ella, until even that patient listener wearied of the +theme; she counted the weeks, the days, the hours, until the report +should arrive. And then one morning, half-way through breakfast, Mr +Chester looked up from his eggs and bacon and remarked casually--as if +it were an ordinary, commonplace subject, and not an affair of life and +death: + +"By the way, Rhoda, there is something about your examination in the +paper to-day. I noticed the heading. You may like to see it!" + +Rhoda leant back in her chair, and held out her hand in dumb entreaty. +The newspaper was open at the right page, and her eye fell at once on +the familiar heading, and, underneath, a long list of numbers. + + + +CHAPTER SEVENTEEN. + +FAILED! + +First Class, Second Class, and still no sign of the familiar number. +Third Class--it was not there! Rhoda gave a little gulp, and began +again from the very beginning. She had been too quick, too eager. It +was so easy to miss a number. One by one she conned them over, but it +was not there. The long Pass List lay below, and she looked at it with +dreary indifference. To scramble through with the rabble was a sorry +attainment, or it seemed so for one moment, but at the next it became, +suddenly, a wild, impossible dream, for--the number was not there! No +fear of overlooking this time, for the figures stood out as if printed +in fire, and burned themselves into her brain. The number was not in +the First Class, nor the Second, nor the Third; it was not in the Pass +List, it was not mentioned at all. + +If she had ever permitted herself to anticipate such a situation, which +she had not, Rhoda would have pictured herself flying into a paroxysm of +despair; but in reality she felt icy cold, and it was in a tone almost +of indifference that she announced: + +"I am plucked! I have not passed at all." + +"Never mind, dear; you did your best, and the work matters more than the +result. Very uncertain tests, these examinations--I never cared about +them," said her father kindly, and Mrs Chester smiled in her usual +placid fashion, and murmured, "Oh, I expect it's a mistake. It's so +easy to make a mistake in printing figures. You will find it is all +right, darling, later on. Have some jam!" + +They were absolutely placid; absolutely calm; absolutely unconscious of +the storm of emotion raging beneath that quiet exterior; but Harold +glanced at his sister with the handsome eyes which looked so sleepy, but +which were in reality so remarkably wide-awake, and said slowly: + +"I think Rhoda has finished, mother. You don't want any jam, do you, +Ro? Come into the garden with me instead. I want a stroll." + +He walked out through the French window, and Rhoda followed with much +the same feeling of relief as that with which a captive escapes from the +prison which seems to be on the point of suffocating him, mentally and +physically. Brother and sister paced in silence down the path leading +to the rose garden. Harold was full of sympathy, but, man-like, found +it difficult to put his thoughts into words, and Rhoda, after all, was +the first to speak. She stopped suddenly in the middle of the path, and +confronted him with shining eyes. Her voice sounded strange in her own +ears. + +"Harold, I--have--failed! I am plucked. I have not passed at all--not +even a common pass." + +"No? I'm uncommonly sorry, but--" + +"But do you realise it; do you understand what it means? I _think_ I +do, but I don't. If I did, I should not be here talking quietly to you. +I should go mad! I should want to kill myself. I should be +desperate!" + +"Don't be silly now, Ro. It's a big disappointment, and I'm sorry for +you, but it's not a bit of use working yourself into hysterics. Face +the thing quietly, and see--" + +"All that it means--. It means a good deal, Harold; more than you can +understand. I think I'd rather be alone, please. You are very kind, +but I can't stand consolation just yet. I'll sit in the arbour." + +"Just as you please. I don't want to force myself, but I'd like to help +you, old girl. Is there nothing else I can do?" + +"Yes; keep mother away! Don't let her come near me until lunch. I am +best left alone, and she doesn't understand--no one understands except +those who have been at school, and know how--how hard--" + +The girl's voice trembled, and broke off suddenly, and she walked away +in the direction of the summer-house, while Harold thrust his hands into +his pockets and kicked the pebbles on the gravel path. He was very fond +of his impetuous young sister, and the quivering sob which had strangled +her last word echoed painfully in his ears. He realised as neither +father nor mother could do what such a failure meant to a proud, +ambitious girl, and how far-reaching would be its consequences. It was +not to-day nor to-morrow that would exhaust this trouble; the bitterest +part was yet to come when she returned to school, and received the +condolences of her more successful companions; when she sat apart and +saw them receive their reward. Harold longed to be able to help, but +there was nothing to do but persuade his parents to leave the girl +alone, and to return at intervals to satisfy himself that she was still +in her retreat, and not attempting to drown her sorrows in the lake. +Three times over he paced the path, and saw the white-robed figure +sitting immovable, with elbows planted on the table, and falling locks +hiding the face from view. So still she sat that he retired silently, +hoping that she had fallen asleep, but on the fourth visit he was no +longer alone, but accompanied by a graceful, girlish figure, and they +did not halt until they stood on the very threshold of the arbour +itself. + +"Rhoda!" he cried, then, "look up! I have brought someone to you. +Someone you will be glad to see." + +The flaxen mane was tossed back, and a flushed face raised in protest. +"I don't--" began Rhoda, and then suddenly sprang to her feet and +stretched out her arms. "Oh, Evie--Evie! You have come. Oh, I wanted +you--I wanted you so badly!" + +Miss Everett stepped forward and drew the girl to her side, and Harold +waited just long enough to see the fair head and the dark nestle +together, and then took himself off to the house, satisfied that comfort +had come at last. + +"I have _failed_, Evie!" cried Rhoda, clasping her friend's hands, and +staring at her with the same expression of incredulous horror with which +she had confronted her brother a couple of hours earlier. "Yes, +darling. I know." + +"And what are you going to say to me, then?" + +"Nothing, I think, for the moment, but that I love you dearly, and felt +that I must come to be with you. Aren't you surprised to see me, +Rhoda?" + +"No, I don't think so. I don't feel anything. I wanted you, and then-- +there you were! It seemed quite natural." + +"But it was rather peculiar all the same. I have been staying with Tom, +and we were both asked down to D-- for a four days' visit. That is only +half an hour's rail from here, as you know; so this morning when I saw +the list in the paper I thought at once--`I must see Rhoda! I will go +down and chance finding her at home!'" + +"Yes!" + +"So I came, and am so glad to be with you, dear. I have seen your +mother, and have promised to stay to lunch. I need not go back until +four o'clock." + +"Oh, that's nice. I like to have you. Evie, I believe it was the +arithmetic. I was so ill, I could hardly think. You might as well know +all now. It was my own doing. I had been working every morning before +getting up, and that day I began at four. I tired myself out before the +gong rang." + +"I guessed as much. Dorothy told me that she heard someone turning over +leaves!" + +"Why don't you say, `I told you so!' then, and tell me that it's my own +fault?" + +"I--don't--know! Perhaps because I do so many foolish things myself; +perhaps because I haven't the heart to scold you just now, you poor +dear." + +Rhoda's face quivered, but she pressed her lips together, and said with +a gulp: + +"I suppose--it's a childish trouble! I suppose--when I am old--and +sensible--I shall look back on to-day, and laugh to think how I worried +myself over such an unimportant trial." + +"I am sure you will do nothing of the kind. You will be very, very +sorry for yourself, and very pitiful, and very proud, too, if you can +remember that you bore it bravely and uncomplainingly." + +"But I can't! I can't bear it at all. It gets worse every moment. I +keep remembering things that I had forgotten. Miss Bruce preaching, and +Miss Mott staring through her spectacles--the girls all saying they are +sorry, and the--the Record Wall, where I wanted to see my name! I +_can't_ bear it, it's no use." + +"But you will _have_ to bear it, Rhoda. It is a fact, and nothing that +you can do will alter it now. You will have to bear it; but you can +bear it in two ways, as you make up your mind to-day. You can cry and +fret, and make yourself ill, and everyone else miserable, or you can +brace yourself up to bear it bravely, and make everyone love and admire +you more than they have ever done before. Which are you going to do?" + +"I am going to be cross and horrid. I couldn't be good if I tried. I'm +soured for life!" said Rhoda stoutly, but even as she spoke a smile +struggled with her tears, and Evie laughed aloud--her sweet, ringing +laugh. + +"Poor, dear old thing! She looks so like it! I know better, and am not +a bit afraid of you. You will be good and plucky, and rejoice +unaffectedly in Kathleen's success." + +"Has Kathleen--Oh! Is Kathleen first?" + +"She has won the Scholarship. Yes, it will be such a joy. She needed +it so badly, and has worked so hard." + +"I hate her!" + +"She was always kind to you. I remember the very first day she took you +round the grounds. You were very good friends." + +"I hate her, I tell you! I detest her name." + +"I am sure you will write and congratulate her. Imagine if _your_ +parents were poor, and you saw them harassed and anxious, how thankful +you would feel to be able to help! Kathleen had a harder time than any +of you, for she could take none of the nice, interesting `Extras.' I +think all her friends will be glad that she has won." + +"I shall be glad, too, in about ten years. If I said I was glad now I +should be a hypocrite, for I wanted it myself. I suppose Irene is all +right, and Bertha, and all the Head girls? Has--has Dorothy--" + +"Yes, Dorothy has passed too." + +Rhoda cried aloud in bitter distress. + +"Oh, Evie--oh! Dorothy passed, and I have failed! Oh it is cruel-- +unjust. I am cleverer than she! You can't deny it. I worked harder. +I was before her always, in every class, in every exam. Oh, it's mean, +it's mean that they should have put her before me!" + +The tears streamed down her face, for this was perhaps the bitterest +moment she had known. To be beaten by Kathleen, and Irene, was +bearable, but--Dorothy! Easy-going, mediocre Dorothy, who had so little +ambition that she could laugh at her own shortcomings, and contentedly +call herself a "tortoise." Well, the tortoise had come off victor once +more, and the poor, beaten hare sat quivering with mortified grief. +Miss Everett looked at her with perplexed, anxious eyes. + +"You will probably find when the full report comes out that you have +done better in most respects, but that it is the preliminaries which +have caused your failure. But Rhoda, Rhoda, how would it help you to +know that another poor girl had failed, and was as miserable as +yourself? Would you be _glad_ to hear that Dorothy was sitting crying +at home, and Kathleen bearing her parents' grief as well as her own? +You could not possibly be so selfish. I know you too well. You are far +too kind and generous." + +"I'm a pig!" said Rhoda contritely, and the tears trickled dismally off +the end of her nose, and splashed on to the wooden table. "I should +like to be a saint, and resigned, and rejoice in the good fortunes of my +companions like the girls in books, but I can't. I just feel sore, and +mad, and aching, and as if they were all in conspiracy against me to +make my failure more bitter. You had better give it up, Evie, and leave +me to fight it out alone. I'll come to my senses in time, and write +pretty, gushing letters to say how charmed I am--and make funny little +jokes at the end about my own collapse. This is Monday--perhaps by +Wednesday or Thursday--" + +"I expect it will be Tuesday, and not an hour later. You are letting +off such an amount of steam that you will calm down more quickly than +you think. And now, hadn't we better go indoors, and bathe those poor +red eyes before lunch? Your mother will think I have been scolding you, +and I don't want to be looked upon as a dragon when I'm out of harness, +and posing as an innocent, unprofessional visitor. Come, dear, and +we'll talk no more of the horrid old exam., but try to forget it and +enjoy ourselves!" + +Rhoda's sigh was sepulchral in its intensity, for, of course, happiness +must henceforth be a thing of the past, so far as she was concerned; but +as she did not appreciate the idea of appearing at lunch with a tear- +stained face, she followed meekly to the house, and entering by a side +door, led the way upstairs to her own luxurious bedroom. + +Half an hour of chastened enjoyment followed as she sat sponging her +eyes, while Evie strolled round the room, exclaiming with admiration at +the sight of each fresh treasure, and showing the keenest interest in +the jugs and their histories. She admired Rhoda's possessions, and +Rhoda admired her, watching the graceful figure reflected in the +mirrors; the pretty dress, so simple, yet so becoming; the dark hair +waving so softly round the winsome face. Evie was certainly one of the +prettiest of creatures, and Rhoda felt a sort of reflected glory in +taking her downstairs and exhibiting her to her family. + +If the tear marks had not altogether disappeared, no one appeared to +notice them, and despite her own silence, lunch was a cheery meal. Evie +chattered away in her gayest manner; Mrs Chester agreed with every word +she said, and called her "dear" as if she were a friend of years' +standing. Mr Chester beamed upon her with undisguised, fatherly +admiration, and Harold looked more animated than Rhoda had seen him for +many a long day. The brisk, bright way in which Evie took up his +drawling sentences, and put him right when he was mistaken in a +statement, would have made him withdraw into his shell if attempted by a +member of the household, but he did not seem in the least annoyed with +Evie. He only smiled to himself in amused fashion, and watched her +narrowly out of the corners of his eyes. + +When dessert was put upon the table, Mrs Chester looked wistfully at +Rhoda's white face, lighted into a feeble smile by one of her friend's +sallies, and was seized with a longing to keep this comforter at hand. + +"I suppose you must go back to D-- this afternoon, dear," she said, "but +couldn't we persuade you to come back and pay us a visit before you +leave this part of the world? It would be a great pleasure to Rhoda, +and to us all, and any time would suit us. Just fix your own day, +and--" + +"Oh, Evie, do!" cried Rhoda eagerly, and both the men joined in with +murmurs of entreaty; but Miss Everett shook her head, and said +regretfully: + +"I'm so sorry, but it's impossible. I have already been away longer +than I intended, and cannot spend another day away from home. My mother +is busier than usual, for a sister who used to teach has had a bad +illness and is staying with us for six months, to rest and be nursed up. +It would not be fair to stay away any longer." + +"I should think you might be allowed to rest in your holidays. You work +hard enough for the rest of the year, and I need you more than the old +aunt, I'm sure I do. You must come, if only for a week!" + +"I wish I could, Rhoda, but it is not possible. I'll tell you, however, +who I believe _could_ come, and who would do you more good than I, and +that is Tom Bolderston! She is in no hurry to return home, and as it is +decided that she is not to come back to Hurst Manor, but go on straight +to Newnham, it will be your last opportunity of seeing her for some +time. You would enjoy having Tom, wouldn't you, Rhoda?" + +Rhoda lifted her eyebrows with a comical expression. Tom here; Tom in +Erley Chase! Tom sitting opposite to Harold and blinking at him with +her little fish eyes--the thought was so comical that she laughed in +spite of herself. + +"I think I should. It would be very funny. If I may ask her, mother--" + +"Of course, of course, darling! Ask whom you will, for as long as you +like," cried the fond mother instantly. From what she had heard of Tom +she had come to the conclusion that she was a very strange, and not +entirely sane, young woman; but Rhoda wished it, Rhoda had laughed at +the suggestion, and said it would be "funny," and that settled the +question. + +A letter of invitation was duly written and given into Miss Everett's +hand when the time came for departure, and brother and sister escorted +her to the station. Rhoda was insistent in her regrets at parting, and, +wonderful to relate, Harold condescended to make still another plea. If +it were impossible to arrange a visit, could not Miss Everett spare a +few hours at least, come down by an early train, and spend a day on the +river with himself and his sister? He urged the project so warmly that +Evie flushed with mingled pleasure and embarrassment. + +"Don't tempt me! I should love it, but we are here only for four days, +and I have been away for one already. It would not be courteous." + +"She is so horribly conscientious, that's the worst of her!" said Rhoda, +as she and Harold retraced their steps across the Park. "She is always +thinking about other people. A day on the river would have been +lovely." + +"Yes, it's a pity. I thought we would ask Ella, and take up lunch and +tea." + +"Yes, of course, a very good idea. Then we should have been four, and I +could have had Evie to myself--" + +"Y-es!" drawled Harold slowly. Two minutes later Rhoda happened to look +at his face, and wondered why in the world he was smiling to himself in +that funny, amused fashion! + + + +CHAPTER EIGHTEEN. + +TOM ARRIVES. + +Tom wrote by return to state that she considered Rhoda "a brick" for +sending her such a "ripping" invitation; that it would be "great sport" +to see her at home, and that she would arrive by the twelve o'clock +train on the next Monday. + +"She isn't pretty," Rhoda explained anxiously to Harold, the fastidious; +"in fact, she's plain, very plain indeed. I'm afraid you won't like +her, but she likes _you_. She saw you on the platform at Euston, and +said you were a `bee-ootiful young man,' and that she was broken-hearted +that she couldn't stay to make your acquaintance." + +"Good taste, evidently, though unattractive!" said Harold, smiling. +"I'm sorry she's not good-looking, but it can't be helped. No doubt she +makes up for it in moral worth." + +"Well, she does, that's perfectly true. I loathed and detested her at +first, but I'm devoted to her now. She's just, and kind, and awfully +clever, and so funny that you simply can't be in low spirits when she's +about. All the girls adore her, but you won't. She says herself that +men can't appreciate her, so she's going to devote her life to women, +out of revenge. Men never care for women unless they are pretty and +taking," cried Rhoda, with an air, and Harold protested sententiously. + +"I'm the exception to the rule! I look beyond the mere exterior, to the +nobility of character which lies behind. Dear Tom's lack of beauty is +nothing to me. I am prepared for it, and shall suffer no disillusion." + +He changed his mind, however, when at the appointed time "dear Tom" +arrived, and stepped from the carriage on to the platform of the little +station. When his eye first fell upon her, in response to Rhoda's +excited, "There she is!" he felt a momentary dizzy conviction that there +must be a mistake. This extraordinary apparition could never be his +sister's friend, but yes! it was even so, for already the girls were +greeting each other, and glancing expectantly in his direction. He went +through the introduction with immovable countenance, saw the two friends +comfortably seated in the pony carriage, and called to mind a message in +the village which would prevent him from joining them as he had +intended. He required a few minutes' breathing time to recover his +self-possession, and the girls drove off alone, not at all sorry, if the +truth were told, to be deprived of his company. + +"Well, Fuzzy!" cried Tom. + +"Well, Tom!" cried Rhoda, and stared with wondering eyes at the +unaccustomed grandeur of her friend's attire. Thomasina had done honour +to the occasion by putting on her very best coat and skirt, of a shade +of fawn accurately matching her complexion, while on her head was +perched that garment unknown at Hurst, "a trimmed hat." Fawn straw, +fawn wings sticking out at right angles, bows of fawn-coloured ribbon +wired into ferocious stiffness--such was the work of art; and +complacent, indeed, was the smile of its owner as she met her +companion's scrutiny. + +"Got 'em _all_ on, haven't I?" she enquired genially. "Must do honour +to the occasion, you know, and here's yourself all a-blowing, all a- +growing, looking as fresh as a daisy, in your grand white clothes!" + +"Indeed, then, I feel nothing of the kind, or it must be a very dejected +daisy. You have heard the news, of course, and know that I am--" + +"Plucked!" concluded Tom, pronouncing the awful word without a quiver. +"Yes. Thought you would be; you were so cheap that arithmetic morning. +You can't do sums when you are on the point of fainting every second +minute... Very good results on the whole." + +"Yes, but--isn't it awful for me? Don't you pity me? I never in my +life had such a blow." + +"Bit of a jar, certainly, but it's over now, and can't be helped. No +use whining!" said Tom calmly, and Rhoda gave a little jump in her seat. +After all, can anyone minister to a youthful sufferer like a friend of +her own age? Tom's remarks would hardly have been considered comforting +by an outsider, yet by one short word she had helped Rhoda more than any +elderly comforter had been able to do. It was interesting and +praiseworthy to grieve over such a disappointment as she had +experienced, to be sorrowful, even heart-broken, but _to whine_! That +put an entirely different aspect on her grief! To whine was feeble, +childish, and undignified, a thing to which no self-respecting girl +could stoop. As Rhoda recalled her tears and repinings, a flush of +shame came to her cheeks, and she resolved that, whatever she might have +to suffer in the future, she would, at least, keep it to herself, and +not proclaim her trouble on the house-tops. + +When the Chase was reached, Tom was taken into the drawing-room and +introduced to Mrs Chester, who poured out tea in unusual silence, +glancing askance at the fawn-coloured visitor who sat bolt upright on +her chair, nibbling at her cake with a propriety which was as +disconcerting to the kindly hostess as it was apparently diverting to +her daughter. Rhoda had been accustomed to see Tom play a hundred sly +tricks over this sociable meal, a favourite one being to balance a large +morsel on the back of her right hand, and with an adroit little tap from +the left send it flying into the mouth stretched wide to receive it, and +it tickled her immensely to witness this sudden fit of decorum. She sat +and chuckled, and Mrs Chester sat and wondered, until Tom politely +declined a third cup of tea, and was dragged into the garden, with +entreaties to behave properly, and be a little like herself, "I thought +I was charming," she declared. "I tried to copy Evie, and look exactly +as she does when she is doing the agreeable. Didn't you notice the +smile? And I didn't stare a bit, though I was longing to all the time. +You _do_ live in marble halls, Fuzzy, and no mistake! We could get the +whole of our little crib into that one room, and we don't go in for any +ornaments or fal-lals. A comfortable bed to sleep in, and lots of +books--that's all my old dad and I trouble about." + +Rhoda thought of the dismal little study at Hurst Manor, with the broken +chairs, and the gloves on the chimney-piece, and could quite imagine the +kind of home from which the owner came; but she murmured little +incredulities, as in politeness bound, as she led the way in the +direction best calculated to impress a stranger. Tom did not pay much +attention to the grounds themselves, but she raved over the horses, and +made friends with all the dogs, even old Lion, the calf-like mastiff, +who was kept chained up in the stable-yard because of his violent +antipathy to strangers. When he beheld this daring young woman walking +up to his very side, and making affectionate overtures for his favour, +he showed his teeth in an alarming scowl, but next moment he changed his +mind, and presently Tom was pinching and punching, and stroking his +ears, with the ease of an old acquaintance. + +"I've never met the dog yet that I couldn't master!" she announced +proudly. "That old fellow would follow me all round the grounds as +meekly as a lamb, if he had the chance!" + +"We won't try him, thank you; he might meet a messenger-boy _en route_, +and we should have to pay the damages. Come along now, and I will show +you--" but at this opportune moment Harold came in view, sauntering +round the corner of the stable, and Rhoda called to him eagerly, glad to +be able to impress him with a sense of Tom's powers. + +"Harold, look here! See what friends Tom has made with Lion already. +He lets her do anything that she likes. Isn't it wonderful?" + +"By Jove!" exclaimed Harold, and looked unaffectedly surprised to see +his gruff old friend submitting meekly to the stranger's advances. +"Tastes differ!" was the mental comment, but aloud he said suavely, +"Lion is a good judge of character. He knows when he has found a +friend." + +"Yes, they all recognise me. I was a bulldog in my last incarnation," +said Tom calmly, and by some extraordinary power which she possessed of +drawing her mobile features into any shape which she chose, certain it +is that she looked marvellously like a bulldog at that moment: twinkling +eyes set far apart, heavy mouth, small, impertinent nose, all complete! +Harold was so taken aback that he did not know what to say, but Rhoda +dragged laughingly at her friend's arm and cried,-- + +"Come along! Come along! It will soon be time to go indoors and dress +for dinner, and we haven't done half our round. I was going to take Tom +to the links, Harold. She is a great golfer, and will be interested in +seeing them. You'll come too, won't you?" + +"With pleasure. They are just our own tame little links, Miss +Bolderston, which we have faked up in the park. You won't think much of +them if you are a player, but they give an opportunity for private +practice, and we have some good sport there occasionally." + +"Ah, yes! How many holes?" enquired Tom, sticking one thumb between the +buttonholes of her coat, and tilting her head at him with such a +businesslike air that he felt embarrassed to be obliged to reply. + +"Nine, with a little crossing about; some of the distances are very +short, I'm afraid. Still, it has its points, and I've played on larger +links with less enjoyment. We will take a short cut across here to the +first hole. We start here, as you see, and a good full cleek shot +should land you on the green. There are only two holes which really +give a chance for a driver. Now you can see the second green, but it's +not so easy a hole as it looks from here, for the grass is tussocky, and +one almost always gets a bad lie for the approach." + +"Yes, but why not drive for the green?" + +"Well, you see, it's rather too far for a cleek, and too short for a +driver. Sometimes I try it with a brassey, but on the whole I think the +cleek is best. If you over-drive you get into awful trouble, as you +will see." So the course was gone over and explained, and Tom's eye was +quick to see the possibilities, and note the dangers, nor did she +hesitate sometimes to differ from Harold's tactics. + +"Well," said he, in conclusion, "what do you think of 'em? Rather +sporting, aren't they?" + +"Humph--yes!" said Tom. "That fifth hole is a little tricky, but I +think they ought to be done in--er--What's your record?" + +"M-well, it varies--of course. I'm no pro., but I can get round in +forty, with luck." + +"Forty! Humph!" Tom wheeled round on her heel, and gazed from right to +left with calculating eyes. Her lips moved noiselessly, then she nodded +her head, and cried confidently: + +"I'll take you! I'll play you to-morrow for the better man!" + +"Done!" agreed Harold at once, but he straightened his shoulders as he +spoke with a gesture which meant that he had no intention, if he knew +it, of being beaten by a school-girl, and his sister looked forward to +the contest with very mingled feelings. If Tom lost, it would be a +distinct blow; yet if Tom won, how Harold would dislike her! How +hopeless it would be to look for any friendship between them after that! +She was glad that the game would have to be deferred for a day at +least, for an evening spent in Tom's company must surely instal her in +public favour. When, however, she went to her friend's room to convey +her downstairs to dinner, Rhoda's confidence was shaken, and she nearly +exclaimed aloud in dismay at the apparition which she beheld. + +Tom in full evening dress was a vision which had been denied to Hurst +Manor, but on the present occasion she had evidently determined to pay +every honour to her hosts, and bony arms and neck emerged festively from +a shot-silk gown, which Rhoda felt convinced must have been a possession +of the long-deceased mother. + +"What do you think of _that_?" Tom cried proudly, rustling round to +confront the new-comer, arms akimbo, and eyes twinkling with +complacency. "There's a natty get-up! Quite a fashion plate, ain't I? +The very latest from Par-ee. You didn't expect to see anything like +that, did you?" + +"I didn't!" cried Rhoda, truthfully enough; but Tom suspected no satire +in her words, and taking up the hand-glass, began twisting and turning +before the mirror so as to get a view of her hair, which was no longer +plaited into a pigtail, but screwed into a knot the size of a walnut, +planted accurately in the middle of her head. + +"I say, what do you think of my coiffure?" + +Rhoda looked, and burst into a shriek of laughter. "Oh, Tom! that's it! +I noticed there was something different, but couldn't think what it +was. Oh, no, no, Tom, you can't leave it like that! You must make it +bigger, and wear it either high or low. It's too ridiculous--that +little button just in the very wrong place. Sit down for one moment, +and I'll arrange it for you!" + +But Tom beat her off resolutely with the hair-brush. + +"I won't! It's my own hair, and I like it this way. It's _distingue_-- +not like every other woman you meet. Now that I've left school and am +grown-up, I must study _les convenances_, and it's fatal to be +commonplace. I may be prejudiced, but it seems to me that in this get- +up I'm a striking figure!" + +The beaming good-humour of her smile, the utter absence of anything +approaching envy or discontent, struck home to Rhoda's heart, and +silenced further protestations. She put her arm round Tom's waist, gave +her an affectionate grip, wishing, for perhaps the first time in her +life, that she herself had put on an older frock, so that the contrast +between herself and her guest should be less marked in the eyes of the +household. + +Alas! socially speaking, Tom was not a success. Mrs Chester was +plainly alarmed by her eccentricities; Mr Chester did not know whether +to take her in fun or in earnest; and Harold's languor grew more and +more pronounced. The very servants stared with astonishment at the +peculiar guest, and when dinner was over Rhoda, in despair, took Tom up +to her own den to avoid the ordeal of an evening in the drawing-room. + +Once alone, with closed doors and no critical grown-ups to listen to +their conversation, the hours sped away with lightning speed, while Tom +told of her own plans, sympathised with Rhoda's ambition, and let fall +words of wisdom, none the less valuable for being uttered in the most +casual fashion. Every now and again the remembrance of her recent +disappointment would send a stabbing pain through Rhoda's heart, but, as +she had said, it was impossible to remain in low spirits in Tom's +company, and if no one else enjoyed that young lady's society it was +precious beyond words to her girl companion. + +The game of golf was played as arranged, but though Harold came off +victor it was too close a contest to be agreeable to his vanity, or to +increase his liking for his opponent, while Mr Chester confided to his +wife that he could not understand Rhoda's infatuation for such a +remarkably unattractive companion. + +"If it had been that sweet little Miss Everett, now, she might have +stayed for a year, and been welcome, but I confess I shall be glad when +this girl takes her departure. She makes me quite nervous, sitting +blinking at me with those little eyes. I have a sort of feeling that +she is laughing to herself when she seems most serious." + +"Oh, she could never laugh at you, dear. She couldn't be so audacious!" +declared Mrs Chester fondly; "but I can't bring myself to like her, and +where her cleverness lies is a mystery to me. I never met a more +ignorant girl. She can neither sew nor knit nor crochet, and the +remarks she made in the market yesterday would have disgraced a child of +ten. I pity the man who gets _her_ for his wife!" + +But, as we have seen, Thomasina had other ideas than matrimony for her +own future. As she drove to the station by Rhoda's side she fell into +an unusual fit of silence, and emerging from it said slowly: + +"I'm glad I've seen your home, Fuzzy. It's very beautiful, and very +happy. You are all so fond of one another, and so nice and kind, that +it's a regular ideal family. I think you are a lucky girl. I like all +your people very much, though they don't like me!" + +Rhoda exclaimed sharply, but Tom's smile was without a shadow of offence +as she insisted-- + +"My dear, I know it! Don't perjure yourself for the sake of politeness. +I'm sorry, but--I'm accustomed to it. Strangers _don't_ like me, and +it's not a mite of use trying to ingratiate myself. I did all I knew +when I came here. I wore my best clothes, I tried to behave prettily, +and you see, dead failure, as usual! You needn't look doleful, for no +doubt it's all for the best. If I were beauteous and fascinating I +might be distracted from my work, whereas now I shall devote myself to +it with every scrap of my strength. Girls love me, and I love them, so +I'll give up my life for their service. We have all our vocation, and +it would be a happier world if everyone were as well satisfied as I am. +`In work, in work, in work always, let my young days be spent.' Bother +it! Here's the station already, and I haven't said half I wanted to!" + +"Nor I to you. It's horrid to say good-bye, and think of school without +you, but you'll write to me, won't you, Tom? You will promise to write +regularly?" + +"Indeed, I won't! Fifty odd girls implored me to write to them, and +it's too big an order. No, my dear Fuzz, I shall have no time to tell +you how busy I am. Here we part, and we must leave it to fate or good +fortune when we meet again. Bless you, my infant! Perk up, and be a +credit to me." + +"But--but--how am I to know, how am I to hear what happens to you? I +_can't_ say good-bye and let you fade away completely, as if we had +never met. It's horrible. You _must_ let me know!" + +"Look in the newspapers. You will see my doings recorded in the Public +Press," replied Tom, as she skipped into the carriage. Rhoda looked on +blankly, her heart sinking with a conviction that Tom did not care; that +it was nothing for her to say good-bye and part without a prospect of +reunion. She was too proud to protest, but, waving her hand, turned +abruptly away and walked out of the station. The train lingered, +however, and the temptation to take one more peep became too strong to +be resisted, so she ran along the path for twenty or thirty yards, and +peered cautiously through a gate from which a sight of the carriage in +which her friend sat could be commanded. Tom had leant back in her +seat, and flung her hat on one side; her little eyes were red with +tears, and she was mopping them assiduously with a ball-like pocket +handkerchief! + + + +CHAPTER NINETEEN. + +SCHOOL AGAIN. + +School again, and no Tom! The house-parlour with no manly figure to +lean with its back against the mantelpiece, and jingle chains in its +pocket; the dining-hall with no one to make faces at the critical moment +when a girl was swallowing her soup, or to nudge her elbow as she lifted +a cup to her lips; the cubicle with no magenta dressing-jacket whisking +to and fro--it was ghastly! The girls could not reconcile themselves to +their loss, and the first fortnight of the term was one of unalloyed +depression. No one dared to joke, for if she did her companions +instantly accused her of "apeing Tom" and snubbed her for the feebleness +of the attempt; no one dared to be cheerful, lest she should be charged +with fickleness, and want of heart. And Irene, the beautiful, reigned +in Tom's stead! It would have been a difficult post for any girl to +have succeeded Thomasina Bolderston, but, curious though it may appear, +Irene's flaxen locks and regular features were for the time being so +many offences in the eyes of her companions. They were accustomed to +Tom; Tom had been the Head Girl of their heart, and they resented the +"finicking" ways of her successor as an insult to the dear departed. + +Irene strove by a gentle mildness of demeanour to soften the prejudice +against her, and the girls but abused her the more. + +"Catch Tom saying `_It didn't matter_'! Imagine Tom pretending she +didn't hear! A nice Head Girl _she_ is! We might as well have Hilary +Jervis!" Irene assumed a pretence of firmness; the girls rolled their +eyes at each other and tittered audibly. The idea of Irene Grey +ordering others about! Plainly, it was time, and time only, which could +give any authority to Tom Bolderston's supplanter! + +How keenly Rhoda felt her friend's absence no one guessed but herself. +Tom's attitude towards the result of the late examinations would have +given the keynote to that of her companions, and have shielded the poor, +smarting victim from much which she now had to endure. The girls were +unaffectedly sorry for her, but pity is an offering which a proud spirit +finds it hard to accept. It seemed strange to realise that girls cast +in such graceful moulds as Dorothy and Irene should be so deficient in +tact as to gush over the humiliation of another, and check the +rhapsodies of successful candidates by such significant coughings and +frownings as must have been obvious to the dullest faculties. Oh, for +Tom's downright acceptance of a situation--her calm taking-for-granted +that the sufferer was neither selfish nor cowardly enough to grudge +success to others! Rhoda felt, as we have all felt in our time, that +she had never thoroughly appreciated her friend until she had departed, +and she was one of the most enthusiastic members of the committee +organised to arrange about the tablet to be composed in Tom's honour. + +Of course, Tom must have a place on the Record Wall! Blues, Reds, +Greens, and Yellows were unanimously decided on the point; contributions +poured in, and on Sunday afternoon the Blues sat in consultation over +the wording of the inscription. + +"The simpler the better. Tom hated gush!" was the general opinion; but +it was astonishing how difficult it was to hit on something simple yet +telling. A high-flown rhapsody seemed far easier to accomplish, and at +last, in despair, each girl was directed to compose an inscription and +to read it aloud for general approval. None were universally approved, +but Rhoda's received the largest number of votes, as being simple yet +comprehensive:-- + +"This tablet is erected to the memory of Thomasina Bolderston, the most +popular `Head Girl' whom Hurst Manor has ever known. Her companions +affectionately record the kindly justice of her rule, and the unfailing +cheerfulness which was a stimulus to them in work and play." + +"Yes--it's the best, decidedly the best, but I should like it to have +been better still!" said Kathleen thoughtfully. "It is so difficult to +describe Tom in three or four lines." + +"And it leaves so much unsaid! I should like to describe her a little +bit so that future pupils might know what she was like. If they read +that, they would imagine her just like anyone else," objected Bertha, +frowning. "I suppose it wouldn't do to say something about her-- +er--`_engaging ugliness_!' or some expression like that?" + +Howls of indignation greeted this audacious proposition, and Bertha was +alternately snubbed, reproached, and abused, until she grew sulky and +retired from the discussion. Rhoda herself came to the rescue, and with +the critical spirit of the true artist acknowledged the defect in her +own work. + +"Bertha is right! What I have written gives no idea of Tom herself. +It's a pity, but I don't see how it can be helped. What words could +describe Tom to anyone who had not seen her? Now, here's another idea! +Why not make a rule that every girl who has had her name inscribed on +the Record Wall must present a framed portrait to the school? All the +frames would be alike, and they would be hung in rows in the Great Hall, +so that future generations of pupils might be able to see what the girls +were like, and feel more friendly towards them!" + +"Rhoda! What a h-eavenly idea!" cried Irene rapturously. "How s-imply +lovely! Why in the world have we never thought of that before?" + +"I never heard of anything so splendid!" cried the girls in chorus, +while Rhoda sat beaming with gratified smiles. Well, if her own name +would never be printed in that roll of honour, at least she had composed +the inscription of one of the most important tablets, and had suggested +a new idea which bade fair to be as much appreciated as the Wall itself! +Already the girls were debating eagerly together as to its +inauguration, and deciding that the different "Heads" should be deputed +to write to those old members of each house who had been honoured with +tablets, to ask for portraits taken as nearly as possible about the date +of leaving school. Irene, of course, would communicate with Tom to +inform her of the step about to be taken by her companions, and to +direct her to be photographed at the first possible moment. + +"And--er--you might just drop a hint about her attire!" said Rhoda, +anxiously, as a remembrance of the dress and coiffure of Erley Chase +rose before her. Nothing more likely than that Tom would elect to do +honour to her companions by putting on her very best clothes for their +benefit, and imagine the horror of the Blues at seeing their old Head +decked out in such fashion! "We should like best to see her as she used +to look here." + +"She must wear the old blue dress, and stand with her back to the +fireplace, with her hands in her pockets," cried Kathleen firmly. "We +don't want to see Tom lying in a hammock against a background of palms, +or smirking over a fan--not much! It's the genuine article we want, and +no make-up. What will she say, I wonder, when she hears she is going to +have a tablet? Will she be pleased or vexed?" + +"She must be pleased--who could help it?--but she will pretend she is +not. Mark my words, she'll write back and say it's a piece of +ridiculous nonsense." + +So prophesied Irene; but the result proved that she was wrong, for Tom, +as usual, refused to be anticipated. Instead of protesting that she had +done nothing worthy of such an honour, and beseeching her companions not +to make themselves ridiculous, she dismissed the subject in a couple of +lines, in which she declared the proposed scheme to be "most laudable," +and calmly volunteered to contribute half-a-crown! + +The Blues agreed among themselves that such behaviour came perilously +near "callousness," but Rhoda recalled that last peep through the bars +of the station gate, and could not join in the decision. She believed +that Tom would be profoundly touched by the honour, so touched and so +proud that she dared not trust herself to approach the subject from a +serious view. And she was right, for if imagination could have carried +her old companions to the study where Tom was then domiciled, they would +have seen her chalking an immense red cross on her calendar against the +date when Irene's letter had arrived, and mentally recording it as the +proudest day of her life. + +No mention was made of the photograph, but in due time it arrived, so +life-like and speaking in its well-known attitude, that the more +sentimental of the girls shed tears of joy at beholding it. Closely +following it came other contributions to the gallery, which the new- +comers examined with keenest interest, feeling more able to understand +the enthusiasm of their seniors, now that the well-known names were +attached to definite personalities. + +About this time, too, arrived a full report of the examination, and, as +had been expected, Rhoda was found to have failed in arithmetic. In +other subjects she had done well, gaining the longed-for distinction in +German and French, so that if only-- Oh! that little "If!" How much it +meant! That terrible mountainous "If," which made all the difference +between failure and success! _If_ it had been a dark morning and she +had slept on! _If_ she had given way to temptation, and dozed off in +the middle of her work! _If_ she had listened to Evie's words of +warning!--If but one of those possible Ifs had been accomplished, she +would have been among the happy crowd to-day, and not standing miserably +apart, the only girl in the house who had failed to pass. The wild +grief of the first few days swept back like a wave and threatened to +overwhelm her, but she clung to the remembrance of Tom's words, and told +herself passionately that she would _not_ "whine"! She would not pose +as a martyr! Even on that great occasion when the certificates were +presented in Great Hall, and the school burst into ecstatic repetitions +of "See the Conquering Hero Comes!" as each fresh girl walked up to the +platform, even through that dread ordeal did Rhoda retain her self- +possession, attempting--poor child--to add a trembling note to the +chorus. + +She never knew, nor guessed, that the girls honoured her more in that +moment than if she had won a dozen distinctions. She did not see the +kindly glances bent upon her by the teachers, for they were careful to +turn aside when she looked in their direction; and if she had seen, she +would never have believed it was admiration, and not pity, which those +looks expressed. In her estimation the occasion was one of pure, +unalloyed humiliation, and when she reached the shelter of her cubicle +she seized the hand-glass and examined her ruddy head anxiously beneath +the electric globe. + +"It isn't true!" she exclaimed. "The ghost stories tell lies. I don't +believe now that anyone's head ever turned white in a night. I can't +see a single grey hair." + + + +CHAPTER TWENTY. + +AN ACCIDENT. + +After a storm comes a calm. Compared with the struggle and anxiety of +the summer term, the one which followed seemed stagnation itself. The +arrival of the report had been an excitement, it is true; but when that +was over the days passed by in uneventful fashion, until autumn waned +and winter came back, with the attendant discomforts of dark mornings, +draughty corridors, and coatings of ice on the water in the ewers; for +this was a good, old-fashioned winter, when Jack Frost made his +appearance in the beginning of December, and settled down with a +solidity which meant that he had come to stay. The hardy girls declared +that it was "ripping," and laughed at the shivery subjects who hobbled +about on chilblained feet, and showed faces mottled blue and red, like +the imitation marble in lodging-house-parlours; the shivery girls +huddled in corners, and wished they could go to bed and hug hot bottles +until May came back and it was fit for human creatures to go about +again! People who possess brisk circulations can never understand the +sufferings of those whom no amount of clothing will keep warm, and who +perform their duties for four months in the year feeling as though icy +water were streaming down their backs. Human sympathy is an elastic +virtue, but it seems powerless to reach so far as that! + +Poor Miss Everett belonged to this latter unhappy class, and perhaps the +hardest duty which she had to perform at Hurst Manor was the spending of +two hours daily in the grounds with her pupils, be the weather warm or +cold. To be sure, they always moved about briskly, playing hockey and +lacrosse so long as the weather allowed, and then turning to skating and +tobogganing, but there were moments of waiting and hanging about, when +the wind cut through her like a knife, and made her pretty face look +pinched to half its size. Rhoda, brisk and glowing, would look at her +with affectionate superiority, call her a "poor, dear, little frog," and +insist upon running races to restore circulation. Evie would declare +that she felt warmer after these exertions, but when at the expiration +of ten minutes she was found to be shivering and chattering as much as +ever, Rhoda would grow anxious, and consequently more flattering in her +similes. + +"You are a hot-house flower, and not fit to rough it like this! It +makes me cold to look at you. I have a great mind to tell Miss Bruce +how you suffer, and ask her to forbid you to come out to games in this +weather!" + +But at this Miss Everett protested in genuine alarm. + +"Rhoda, you must do nothing of the kind! Don't you see that it would be +as much as saying that I am unfit for my work? Miss Bruce thinks it +quite as important that I should be with you for games as for work; +perhaps more so, for there is more likelihood of your getting into +mischief. I don't like feeling cold, but after all it is only for a few +weeks in the year, and as I thoroughly enjoy being out of doors for the +rest of the time there is not much to grumble about. It won't kill me +to shiver a little bit." + +"Cold, cough, consumption, coffin!" quoted Rhoda cheerfully. "I hate to +see you with a blue nose, when I am tingling all over with heat, and +feeling so fit and jolly. It's unsociable--and unbecoming! Now just +skate once more round the field with me, and I won't worry you any +more!" + +Miss Everett sighed, and consented. Her feet were so numbed that she +had believed them incapable of any feeling, but now the straps of her +skates were beginning to cut into her like so many sharp-edged knives. +She longed to take them off, but did not like to refuse the girl's +kindly invitation, while, unselfishly speaking, it was a pleasure to see +the graceful figure skimming along by her side, with such healthful +enjoyment in the exercise. + +The pupils at Hurst Manor were seldom, if ever, allowed to skate on the +lake, for it was deep, and the Principal preferred to have one of the +fields flooded in its stead, where the girls could disport themselves +with that sense of security which comes from seeing little tufts of +grass showing beneath the surface of the ice. Even nervous subjects +grew bold under such conditions, and while the more advanced skaters cut +figures, or even essayed a game of hockey, the spectators circled round +and round, looking admiringly at their exploits. At one end of the +field was a slight ditch, or rather undulation in the ground, which when +frozen over afforded a source of unending amusement, being as good as a +switchback itself. Daring skaters went at it with a dash which brought +them safely up the incline on the further side, but by far the greater +number collapsed helplessly at the bottom, or, rising half-way up the +ascent, staggered back with waving arms and gasping cries, vastly +entertaining to the spectators. Evie would never be induced to make +this experiment, having, as she said, "too much respect for her ankles" +to subject them to so severe a trial, and having also passed that age +when to tumble down in an icy ditch twenty times over in the course of +an afternoon seems the height of mortal bliss. + +The hardihood of the vast majority of the girls, the imperturbable good +nature with which they picked themselves up from their recumbent +position and hobbled up the banks on the edge of their skates, spoke +volumes for the success of the system on which they were educated. They +returned to the house glowing and panting, and surged up the staircase-- +a stream of buoyant young life which seemed to warm the draughty +corridors and bring sunshine into the colourless rooms. The piles of +"bread and scrape" which disappeared at tea after such an afternoon as +this would have amazed the parents of the daughters whose appetites at +home had been so captious as to excite anxiety in the maternal heart! + +"Of course," as the croakers had it, as soon as a week's consecutive +skating had made everyone proficient enough to enjoy the pastime, the +snow descended, and fell in a persistent shower which made the ice +impossibly rough. The girls looked out from their windows on a +wonderful white world, whose beauty was for the time hidden from them by +disappointment, but, in the end, even snow seemed to bring with it its +own peculiar excitements. Relief gangs of pupils were organised to +sweep the principal paths in the grounds, while those not so employed +set to work to manufacture "snow men." Not the ordinary common, or +garden snow man, be it understood--that disreputable, shapeless +individual with his pipe in his mouth, and his hat perched on the back +of his head, with whom we are all familiar--the Hurst Manor girls would +have none of him; but, superintended by the "Modelling Mistress," set to +work with no smaller ambition than to erect a gallery of classic +figures. Some wise virgins chose to manufacture recumbent figures, +which, if a somewhat back-breaking process, was at least free from the +perils which attended the labours of their companions. What could be +more annoying than to have two outstretched arms drop suddenly, at the +very moment when the bystanders were exclaiming with admiration, and to +be obliged to convert a flying god into a Venus de Milo as the only +escape from the difficulty? Or, again, how was it possible to achieve a +classic outline when a nose absolutely refused to adhere to a face for +more than two minutes together? The recumbent figures lay meekly on +their beds and allowed themselves to be rolled, and patted, and pinched +into shape, until at a distance, they presented quite a life, or rather +deathlike, effect. The girls declared that the sight gave them the +"creeps," whatever that mysterious malady might be, and snowballed the +effigies vigorously before returning to the house, so that no straggler +through the grounds might be scared by their appearance. + +All this time an eager outlook was kept on a sloping bank at the end of +the cricket ground, where the snow lay first in patches and then by +degrees in an unbroken mass. When it grew deep enough tobogganing would +begin, and that was a sport held in dearest estimation. The course was +dubbed "Klosters," after the famous run at Davos, for the school-girl of +to-day is not happy unless she can give a nickname to her haunts, and it +was sufficiently steep to be exciting, though not dangerous. + +Rhoda had been accustomed from childhood to practise this sport at home, +and had brought to school her beautiful American toboggan, with the +stars and stripes emblazoned on polished wood, ready for use if +opportunity should occur. She knew that her experience would stand her +in good stead, and was now, as ever, on the outlook for a chance of +distinguishing herself in the eyes of her companions. One may be +naturally clever and athletic, but it is astonishing how many others, +equal, and even superior to oneself, can be found in an assembly of over +two hundred girls. Do what you would, a dozen others appeared to +compete with you, and it was ten to one that you came off second best. + +"But wait till we can toboggan!" said Rhoda to herself. "They will see +_then_ who has the most nerve! I'll astonish them before I have done!" +And she did. + +Following a fall of snow came a frost, which pressed down and hardened +the soft surface until it was in perfect condition for the desired +sport. The games captains surveyed the course, and pronounced it ready, +and directly after lunch a procession of girls might have been seen +wending their way from the house, dragging toboggans in their wake, and +chattering merrily together. The wind blew sharp and keen, and many of +the number looked quite Arctic, waddling along in snow shoes, reefer +coats, and furry caps with warm straps tied over the ears. It was _de +rigueur_ to address such personages as "Nansen"; but Rhoda gained for +herself the more picturesque title of "Hail Columbia" as she strode +along, straight and alert, her tawny curls peeping from beneath a +sealskin cap, her stars and stripes toboggan making a spot of colour in +the midst of the universal whiteness. No one thought of addressing her +except in a more or less successful imitation of an American twang, or +without including the words "I guess" in every sentence, and she smiled +in response, well satisfied to represent so honoured a nation. + +The progress of dragging toboggans to the top of an incline is always +uninteresting, and never takes place without an accompaniment of +grumbling, in which, we may be sure, the Hurst Manor girls were in no +way behind. They groaned, and sighed, and lamented, as in duty bound, +while Dorothy went a step further and improved the occasion by moral +reflections. + +"If I were a man I could preach a splendid sermon on tobogganing. All +about sliding down hill, you know, and how easy it is, and how quickly +done, and how jolly and lively it feels, and then the long, long drag +back when you want to get to the top again. It is a splendid +illustration; for, of course, sliding down would mean doing wrong things +that are nice and easy, and the climb back the bad time you would have +pulling yourself together again and starting afresh... It's really a +splendid idea. I wonder no--" But at this moment it occurred to Dorothy +to wonder at something else, namely, how it was that her toboggan had +grown suddenly so light, and turning round to discover the reason, she +found it rapidly sliding downhill. The girl immediately behind had +nipped out her knife and deftly cut the leading string, as a practical +demonstration of the favour in which "sermonising" was held at Hurst, +and the whole band stood and screamed with laughter as the would-be +preacher retraced her steps to the bottom of the hill, and started +afresh on her symbolic climb! + +Five minutes later, with a rush and a whoop the first toboggans came +flying down the slope. Their course was, perhaps, a trifle erratic, and +apt to be followed by a spill at the bottom, but these were unimportant +details only to be expected in the first run of the season, and the +style improved with every fresh start. One girl after another came +flying down, drew her toboggan up a little slope facing the run, and sat +down upon it to recover breath and watch the exploits of her companions. +Experience had proved that, however rapid the descent, a toboggan +invariably stopped short before this edge was reached, so that it was +accepted as a retreat of absolute safety, and, as a rule, there were as +many girls resting there as starting from the brow of the hill. All +went on merrily, then, until in the very height of the fun Dorothy was +seized with an attack of her usual sickness. It was not a very deadly +complaint--nothing more serious than haemorrhage from the nose, but it +was astonishing how much trouble it seemed able to give her! To the +gaze of the world that nose was both a pretty and innocent-looking +feature, but it must surely have been possessed with an evil spirit, +since there was no end to the plights in which it landed the unhappy +owner! It disdained to bleed in a cubicle, or any such convenient +place, but delighted in taking advantage of the most awkward and +humiliating opportunities. It bled regularly at Frolics, when she wore +her best clothes, and wished to be merry; it bled in the ante-room of +the Examination Hall, so that she went in to tackle the mathematical +paper with three pennies and two separate keys poked down her back; it +bled at the critical part of a game or when she went out to tea, or +forgot to put a handkerchief in her pocket. "It is my cross!" she would +sigh sadly, and to-day she was inclined to say so more than ever, since +the attack was so severe, that she must needs go indoors, and leave her +favourite sport on the very first day when it had been possible to enjoy +it. + +Miss Everett walked with her across the field, cheering and encouraging, +and directing her to go straight to Nurse when she reached the house, +then retraced her own steps and hurried back to her charges. She had +been away only five minutes, barely five minutes, but in that short time +something had happened which was destined to bring about life-long +consequences to more than one member of the party, for it chanced that +just as she turned away Rhoda Chester reached the top of the run, on the +lookout for fresh opportunities. It was absurd to go over the same +course, with no change, no excitement--to do what thirty other girls +could do as well as herself! She must try to discover some variety this +time, and so she gazed about with critical eyes, and suddenly had an +inspiration, for why not drag the toboggan a yard or two further up the +steep bank beyond the path which made the present start? It was a tree- +crowned bank, forming the very crest of the hill, so short that it +measured at the most six or seven yards, but of a steepness far +eclipsing any other portion of the run. If she could start from this +higher point she would accomplish a feat unattempted by any of her +companions, and descend at a velocity hitherto unknown! + +No sooner thought than done, and she began to climb the bank, dragging +the toboggan behind her, while the onlookers stared aghast. + +"In the name of everything that is crazy, Rhoda Chester, what are you +doing up there?" + +"Rhoda, come _down_! Don't be absurd! You can't possibly start from +there!" + +"Why not, pray? I can, if I choose. I'm tired of ambling down that +baby-run. I want a little variety!" + +"You will have it with a vengeance, if you start from there. It's far +too steep. Don't be obstinate now, and get into trouble. Evie will be +furious with you." + +"Why should she be? There's no rule against it. I'm not doing anything +wrong... Get out of the way, please. I'm coming!" + +"No, no; wait, wait! Wait until Evie comes back, and says you may. She +will be here in a moment. _Do_ wait, Rhoda, just one minute!" + +But Rhoda would not wait. Although, as she had argued, there was no +rule forbidding what she was about to do, she had an instinctive feeling +that Evie was too anxious about the safety of her charges to give +consent to anything that involved unnecessary risk. Evie's absence was +her opportunity, and she must act now or never; so, seating herself +firmly on her toboggan, she called out the last word of warning; "I'm +coming, I tell you! Stand back!" + +"You will break your neck! You will kill yourself, if you are so mad!" + +"Oh, bother my neck! I'll risk it! I'll not blame you if it _is_ +broken!" cried Rhoda, recklessly; and even as she spoke the last word +the toboggan shot forward and bounded over the edge. _Bounded_ is the +right word to use, for it did not seem to glide, but to leap from top to +bottom with a lightning-like speed which took away breath, sight, and +hearing. That first moment was a terrible blank and then she shot over +the path itself, and was flying down, down the slope, drawing her breath +in painful gasps, and staring before her with distended eyes. + +The girls on the bank were craning forward to watch her approach. She +saw the blur of their whitened faces, and behind them a little figure +running wildly forward, waving its arms and crying aloud: + +"Girls, girls! Jump! _Run_! Get away, get away!" + +The words rang meaningless in her ears, for she was dazed beyond the +power of thought. The running figure drew nearer and nearer, still +waving its hands, still calling out that agonised cry. The girls +disappeared to right and left, but the figure itself was close at hand-- +closer--closer--at her very side. Then came a shock, a jar. Evie's +tottering figure fell forward over her own; Evie's shriek of anguish +rang in her ears, and then came blackness--a blackness as of death! + + + +CHAPTER TWENTY ONE. + +THE CONSEQUENCES. + +When Rhoda opened her eyes she was lying in a strange bed, and some one +was sitting by her side, anxiously watching her face. It was not Nurse +_par excellence_, but the matron of another house, whose features seemed +unfamiliar, despite their kindly expression. + +"You are better? You feel rested now?" she questioned, and Rhoda +struggled wearily to form a a reply. + +"My head aches. I feel--tired!" + +"Yes, yes, of course. Don't speak, but lie quite still; I will stay +beside you." + +A soothing hand was pressed upon her own, and once again her eyes +closed, and she floated away into that strange, dream-like world. +Sometimes all was blank, at other times she was dimly conscious of what +went on around, as when voices murmured together by her side, and Nurse +related how she had spoken and answered a question, and the doctor +declared in reply that she was better, decidedly better! She was heavy +and weary, and had no desire but to be left alone, while time passed by +in a curious, dizzy fashion, light and darkness succeeding each other +with extraordinary celerity. Then gradually all became clear; she was +lying in the sick room where patients suffering from non-infectious +complaints were taken. The pressure at her head was giving way, +allowing glimmering flashes of memory. What was it?--a terrible, +terrible nightmare; a horror as of falling from a great height; a +sudden, numbing crash... Where has she been? What had she done? And +then with another struggling gleam--the toboggan! + +Her cry of distress brought the nurse to her side, while she gasped out +a feeble-- + +"I remember! I was tobogganing.--I was too quick. I suppose I fell?" + +"Yes, you fell, but you are better now; you are getting on finely. Just +keep quiet, and you will be up again in a few days." + +There was a tone of relief in the good woman's voice as though there had +been another remembrance which she had feared to hear, but Rhoda did not +notice it, for a very few words seemed to tire her in those days, and +her brain was unable to grasp more than one idea at a time. + +The next time she awoke her mother was sitting by the bed. It appeared +that she had been staying in the house for the past four days, peeping +in at the invalid while she slept, but waiting the doctor's permission +to appear before her waking eyes. Rhoda was languidly pleased to see +her, but puzzled to account for the air of depression which lay so +constantly on the once cheery face. If she were getting better, why did +everyone look so doleful--the doctor, her mother, Miss Bruce--everyone +whom she saw? She questioned, but could get no answer, struggled after +a haunting memory, which at one moment seemed at the point of shaping +itself into words, and at the next retreated to a hopeless distance. +And then suddenly, by one of those marvellous actions of the brain which +we can never understand, the whole scene flashed upon her as she lay +upon her pillow, thinking of something entirely different, and not +troubling her head about the mystery. + +She saw herself dragging the toboggan up the bank, felt again the horror +of that first mad rush, saw the girls flying to right and left before +Evie's waving arms, and heard Evie's voice shriek aloud in the pain of +the sudden collision. Her own agonised exclamation brought mother and +nurse hurrying across the room to lay soothing hands upon her, and hold +her down in bed as she cried out wildly-- + +"Oh, I remember! I remember! Evie! The toboggan dashed up the bank, +and she was looking after the girls, and I crashed into her, and she +shrieked. Oh, Evie! Evie! She was hurt, terribly hurt... She fell +down over me. Where is she now? I must go to her--I must go at once!" + +The two watchers exchanged a rapid glance, and even in that moment of +agitation Rhoda realised that this was the awakening which they had been +dreading, this the explanation of the universal depression. A new note +of fear sounded in her voice, as she quavered feebly: + +"Is Evie--dead?" + +"No, no, nor likely to die! She has been ill, but is getting better +now. She is in her own room, with Nurse to look after her. You cannot +possibly see her yet, for it would be bad for both." + +"But you are sure she is better? You are sure she will get well? You +are not deceiving me just to keep me quiet?" + +"No, indeed. It is the truth, that she is getting stronger every day. +When I say that, you can believe that I am not deceiving you, can't you, +dear?" + +Yes, of course, she was bound to believe it; but in some patients the +faculties seem strangely sharpened in convalescence, and despite her +mother's assurance Rhoda felt convinced that something was being kept +back--that something had happened to Evie which she was not to be +allowed to know. She asked no more questions, but with sharpened eyes +watched the faces of the visitors who were now allowed to see her, and +found in each the same shade of depression. She was waiting for an +opportunity, and it came at last on the first day when she was allowed +to sit up, and Miss Bruce came in to pay her usual visit. No one else +was in the room, and Rhoda looked up into the strong, grave face, and +felt her heart beat rapidly. Now was her opportunity! Miss Bruce could +be trusted to answer truthfully, however painful might be the news which +she had to unfold; she was neither hard nor unsympathetic, but she had +the courage of her convictions, and had faced too many disagreeable +duties to understand the meaning of shirking. Rhoda clasped her hands +tightly together, swallowed nervously once or twice, and began-- + +"Miss Bruce please--I want to ask you--Mother won't tell me. Was it my +fault that--Evie was hurt?" + +The Principal's face hardened involuntarily. + +"What do you think yourself, Rhoda? Your companions, as you know, are +never ready to speak against a friend, but I have made the strictest +enquiries into this sad affair, and I hear that the girls warned you +that you were attempting a dangerous feat, and implored you to wait +until Miss Everett returned. You chose to disregard them, and to take +no thought of the risk to others, and--" + +Rhoda turned, if possible, a shade paler than before. + +"I see!" she said slowly. "I suppose it's no use saying that I never +thought I could hurt anyone but myself. I _should_ have thought! +Everyone who knows me, knows that I love Evie, and would rather have +been smashed to pieces than have harmed her in any way." + +"Yes, Rhoda!" Miss Bruce sighed heavily, "that is quite true, +nevertheless it seems to me a little inconsistent that you did not think +more of her feelings. She was responsible for your safety, and you can +hardly have believed that she would have allowed such a mad trick. +However, I don't wish to reproach you, for your punishment has been +taken out of my hands. Nothing that I could do or say could affect you +half so much as the thought of the trouble which you have brought upon +your kind, good friend--" + +It was coming now; it was coming at last! Rhoda's heart gave a wild, +fluttering leap; she looked up breathlessly into the unbending face. + +"What is the trouble? I thought she was like me--stunned and shaken. I +never heard--" + +"No, it is not at all the same. You had a slight concussion, from which +you have now recovered. Her injury is much more lasting. Her right +knee-cap was broken, and the doctors fear it will never be quite right +again. She will probably be lame for life." + +Rhoda turned her head aside, and said no word, and Miss Bruce stood +looking down at her in silence also. The curly hair was fastened back +by a ribbon tied in the nape of the neck, and the profile was still +visible leaning against the pillows. It was motionless, except for one +tell-tale pulse above the ear which beat furiously up and down, up and +down, beneath the drawn skin. The Principal looked on that little +pulse, and laid her hand pitifully on the girl's head. + +"I will leave you now, Rhoda. You would rather be alone. I am truly +sorry for you, but I am powerless to help. One can only pray that some +good may come out of all this trouble." + +She left the room, and Rhoda was alone at last, to face the nightmare +which had come into her life. Evie _lamed_, and by her doing! Evie +injured for life by one moment's thoughtlessness--rashness--call it +_wickedness_ if you will--even then it seemed impossible that it should +be _allowed_ to have such lasting consequences! One moment's +disobedience, and then to suffer for it all her life! to see Evie--dear, +sweet, graceful Evie--limping about, crippled and helpless; to keep ever +in one's mind the memory of that last wild run--the last time Evie would +ever run! Could retribution possibly have taken to itself a more +torturing form? She had spoiled Evie's life, and brought misery into a +happy home. + +"I could have borne it if it had happened to myself," she gasped. "But +no! I must needs get well, and be strong, and rich, and healthy. I +suppose I shall laugh again some day, and forget, and be happy, while +Evie--. I am a Cain upon earth, not fit to live! I wish I could die +this minute, and not have a chance to do any more mischief." + +But we cannot die just because we wish to escape the consequences of our +own misdoing; we are obliged to live, and face them day after day. +Crises of suffering, moments of humiliation, stabbing returns of pain +just when we are congratulating ourselves that the worst is over--they +must be lived through, and though we fly to the ends of the world they +will still follow in our wake. + +One of the consequences which Rhoda dreaded, and yet longed for in +curious, contradictory fashion, was her first interview with Evie +herself. What would she say? What would she do? Would she be sweet +and self-forgetful as of old, or full of bitter reproaches? She could +gather no clue from her companions, and her first request to be allowed +to visit the invalid in her room was vetoed on the ground that the +excitement would be bad for herself, and could do Evie no good. When, +however, she was allowed to walk about, and even entertain her +companions to tea, the first excuse could no longer be offered, and at +last, consent being given, she tapped tremblingly at the well-known +door. Nurse's voice bade her enter, and she walked forward with her +eyes fixed on the bed on which Evie lay. Her face was thin and drawn, +and had lost its colour, yet it was none of these things which struck a +chill to Rhoda's heart, but the expression in the eyes themselves-- +Evie's sweet brown eyes, which of old had been alight with kindly +humour. They were blank eyes now, listless eyes, which stared and +stared, yet seemed hardly to see that at which they gazed. Rhoda stood +before her for a full moment, before the light of recognition showed in +their depths, and even then it was a flicker more than a light, and died +out again with startling rapidity. + +The girl stood trembling, the carefully rehearsed words fading away from +memory, for excuses and protestations seemed alike useless in the +presence of that despairing calm. She looked pitifully into the set +face, and faltered out: + +"Evie, I've come... I wanted to see you! I have thought about you +every minute of the time... I could not stay away--" + +No answer. Evie might not have heard her speak, for all signs of +emotion which appeared on her face. Rhoda waited another moment and +then with a catch in her voice asked another question: + +"Is--is your knee very painful, Evie?" + +"No!" Evie winced at that, and turning towards the other side of the +bed, held out her hand appealingly towards the Nurse, who took it in her +own, and frowned a warning to the visitor. + +"You had better go now, Miss. She isn't equal to much yet. You have +got your way and seen her, so just give her a kiss, and go quietly +away." + +Tears of disappointment rushed to Rhoda's eyes, and as she stooped to +give that farewell kiss the salt drops fell upon Evie's cheeks, and +roused her momentarily from her lethargy. + +"Poor Rhoda!" she sighed softly. "Poor little Rhoda!" then her eyes +closed, and Nurse took hold of the girl's arm and led her resolutely +away. + +"You look as if you were going to faint yourself, and I can't have two +of you on my hands," she said as soon as the corridor was reached, and +the door closed behind them. "You'll just come back to your own room, +my dear, and lie down on the bed." + +"Nurse--tell me! you have been with her the whole time, and know how she +feels. Will she ever forgive me? I never, never thought it would be so +bad as this. She would not speak to me, would not look at me even." + +"She wasn't thinking of you at all, my dear, she was thinking of her +knee. That is all she can find time to think of just now. The doctors +kept it from her as long as they could, but she questioned them, and +would not be put off, so they had to tell her the truth. She knows she +will be lame, and it has pretty well broken her heart. It's the bread +out of her mouth, poor lamb, and she knows it. It will be many a long +day before she is herself again." + +And this was the end of Rhoda's first meeting with Laura Everett after +her accident! + + + +CHAPTER TWENTY TWO. + +MRS. CHESTER'S PLAN. + +It was many days before Rhoda saw Miss Everett again, but, if she was +not admitted to the sick room, her mother was a frequent and welcome +visitor, and took entire charge of the invalid while the nurse fulfilled +her ordinary duties. There was little actual nursing to be done, but +the doctors were anxious to prevent solitary repinings, and to do what +was possible to raise the spirits of their patient. Evie's own mother +had come down for a few days to satisfy herself concerning her +daughter's condition, but had been obliged to hurry back to the +Vicarage, where the invalid sister was growing worse rather than better, +so that her presence could badly be spared. She was a worn, faded +edition of Evie, and looked so typical of what the girl herself might +now become that Rhoda could not bear to look at her. The two mothers, +however, became great friends, for they met with a remembrance of +kindness on the one side, and an overwhelming sympathy on the other, and +were drawn together by hours of mutual anxiety. In each case the worst +dread was unfulfilled, but what remained to be borne required all the +fortitude which they could summon. The Vicar's wife saw one of the +props of the home disabled for life, and Mrs Chester's kind heart was +wrung with anguish at the thought that her child had been the cause of +so much suffering. It seemed a strange dispensation of Providence that +she, the main object of whose life had been to help her fellow- +creatures, should have this burden laid upon her; but she bore it +uncomplainingly, striving to cheer the poor woman whose lot was so much +harder than her own. + +Before they parted she broached a scheme which she had been planning in +secret, and, having received a willing consent, bided her opportunity to +lay it before the invalid herself. It came at last one chilly +afternoon, when Evie was laid on a sofa before the fire, as a sign that +convalescence had really begun. The knee was still bound up, as it was +not proposed that she should attempt to walk until the journey home had +been accomplished, and it was on this subject that Evie made her first +remark. + +"I suppose," she began, looking at Mrs Chester with the brown eyes +which had grown so pathetic in their gaze in the last few weeks, "I +suppose I can travel now, as soon as it can be arranged. I shall have +to be carried about at each of the changes, and it must be planned ahead +in this busy season. I must speak to Miss Bruce, and ask her what I had +better do." + +Mrs Chester bent forward and poked the fire in a flurried, embarrassed +manner; she knitted her brows, and her rosy face grew a shade deeper in +colour. + +"Er--yes," she assented vaguely. "Of course; but Evie, dear, I have +been waiting to talk to you about something which has been very much on +my mind lately. We are leaving on Thursday, Rhoda and I, and are having +a through carriage and every possible appliance to make the journey +easy, and I thought that it would be so much simpler for you, dear, to +travel with us, and spend a few weeks at the Chase before going home!" + +Evie smiled, with the languid courtesy with which an invalid listens to +an impossible proposition. + +"It is very kind of you," she said. "Some day I shall be glad to come, +but not at present, thank you. I am not well enough to pay visits." + +"But my child, it would not be like an ordinary visit; you should do +exactly as you would in your own home--stay in bed, or get up, as you +pleased, and make out your own programme for the day. You know me now, +and can surely understand that you need feel no ceremony in coming to my +house." + +"No, indeed! You have been so kind to me all this time, that I should +be ungrateful if I did not realise that. I would rather be with you +than anyone else outside my own family, but--but--" the tears gathered +and rolled down the pale cheeks--"Oh, surely you understand that just +now I want to be at home with my own mother and father!" + +"Yes, I do understand, poor dear; it would be unnatural if you felt +anything else; but listen, Evie, it is for your parents' sake, as well +as for your own, that I urge you to come. You need constant care and +nursing, and cheering up, and it would be very difficult for them to +manage all this just now. Your mother is overworked as it is, and has +already one invalid on her hands; but if you come to us, the whole +household will be at your service. My kind old Mary shall be your +nurse, and wait upon you hand and foot. I will drive you about so that +you can get the air without fatigue, and you shall have your couch +carried into the conservatory off the drawing-room, and lie there among +the flowers which you love so much. Every comfort that money can buy +shall be yours to help to make you strong again. I say it in no spirit +of boasting, dear, for we have been poor ourselves, and owe our riches +to no merit of our own. We look upon them as a trust from God, to be +used for the good of others even more than ourselves, and surely no one +had ever a nearer, stronger claim--" + +Her voice broke off tremblingly, and Evie looked at her with a troubled +glance. + +"Dear Mrs Chester, you are so good! It all sounds most attractive and +luxurious, and I am sure you would spoil me with kindness, but--would it +not be rather selfish? You say mother is overworked, and that is quite +true; but, all the same, she might feel hurt if I chose to go somewhere +else." + +"Now, I'll tell you all about it," cried Mrs Chester briskly, scenting +victory in the air, and beginning to smile again in her old cheery +fashion. "Your mother and I had a talk about it before she left. She +felt grieved not to have you at home for Christmas, but for your own +sake was most anxious that you should come to us. She realised that it +would be better for you in every way, and the quickest means to the end +which we all have in view, to make you well and strong again. She left +it to me to make the suggestion, but you will find that she is quite +willing, even anxious--" + +"Yes," said Evie, and lay silently gazing at the heart of the fire. The +downcast face looked very fair and fragile, but for the moment the old +sweetness was wanting. The lips were pressed together, the chin was +fixed and stubborn, outward signs of the mental fight which was going on +between the impulse to give way, and a sore, sore feeling of injury +which made it seem impossible to accept a favour from this quarter of +all others. The elder woman saw these signs, and read their meaning +with painful accuracy, and the exclamation which burst from her lips +startled the invalid by its intensity. + +"Oh, my lassie!" she cried. "Oh, my lassie, be generous! You have been +sorely tried, and our hearts are broken to think of your trouble, but +don't you see this is the only way in which it is left to us to help? +Sympathy and regret are abstract things, and can do no real good, for, +though they ease our minds, they leave you untouched. My dear girl, can +you be generous enough to accept help from the hands that have injured +you? It's a hard thing to ask--I know it is; but I am an old woman, and +I plead with you to give us this opportunity! Let me be a mother to +you, dear, and ease your recovery in every way that I can. Money has +great power, and one never realises it more than in time of sickness. I +can spare you many a pain and discomfort if you will give me the +opportunity, and my poor girl is fretting herself thin by brooding over +the past--it would be new life to her to be allowed to wait upon you! +It's hard for you, dear, I know it's hard! You would rather cut +yourself adrift from us, and never see us again; but it is in your power +to return good for evil--to lighten our trouble as no one else could do. +Will you come, Evie?" + +Evie looked into the quivering face, and her eyes shone--then the kind +arms opened wide and the brown head nestled down on the broad, motherly +shoulder. There was no need for words, for the answer was given far +more eloquently in look and gesture. + +"God bless you, my lassie!" murmured Mrs Chester fondly, and they sat +in silence together, gazing into the fire. A few tears rose in Evie's +eyes and ran silently down her cheeks, but they were happy tears, with +which were wiped away all remains of bitterness. There is no truer way +of forgiving our enemies than by consenting to be helped at their hands, +and, if the effort be great, it brings with it an exceeding great +reward. At the end of ten minutes Evie raised her head from its resting +place and said, in her old, bright voice: + +"Shall we ask Rhoda to tea? It is such a lovely fire, and you brought +in such a bountiful supply of cakes and good things that it seems greedy +to keep them all to myself. Ask Rhoda to come in and help to make a +cosy little party." + +Then, as Mrs Chester stooped to kiss her cheek, she whispered hastily, +"Tell her not to mention the past--never to mention it again! We will +turn over a new leaf to-day and think only of the future." + + + +CHAPTER TWENTY THREE. + +GOOD-BYE TO HURST MANOR. + +The morning of the day dawned on which the invalids were to travel to +Erley Chase, and Rhoda lay awake upon her bed, listening to the echo of +the girls' voices as they sang the morning hymn in the hall below. Her +heart was softened with a feeling at once of thankfulness and dread-- +thankfulness that Evie's life had been spared, and her friendship +renewed, and dread because, she dimly realised, this was the last of the +dear school days as they had been. Even if she returned after the +holidays, which seemed doubtful, it would be a changed house indeed, +with the older girls scattered all over the country, and Evie no longer +at hand to soothe and lighten every trouble. Her thoughts went back to +her first coming to Hurst Manor eighteen months before, and dwelt sadly +on her own ambitious hopes. It had all seemed so easy, so certain; she +had planned her career with such happy assurance, with never a thought +but that success and distinction lay waiting for her grasp; and it had +all ended in this--that she was returning home, enfeebled in health, +foiled in ambition, with the bitter weight on her conscience that her +self-will had inflicted a life-long injury on the kindest of friends. + +"I have failed!" sighed Rhoda humbly to herself. "But why? I never +meant to do wrong. I intended only to work hard and get on. Surely, +surely, there was nothing wicked in that? It can't be possible to be +too industrious, and yet Evie evidently thought something was wrong, and +the Vicar... What can it have been? I wish, I wish I knew! I'm tired +of going my own way, for it leads to nothing but misery and +disappointment. I should like to find out the secret of being happy and +contented like other people." Her eyes filled with tears, those blue +eyes which had been so full of confidence, and she clasped her fingers +upon the counterpane. The roll of the organ sounded through the house, +and the girls' clear voices singing a familiar tune. She listened +unthinkingly, until suddenly one verse struck sharply on her ear, and +startled her into vivid attention:-- + + "The trivial round, the common task, Will furnish all we ought to ask; + Room to deny ourselves, a road To bring us daily nearer God." + +She had heard those words a hundred times before, had repeated them at +her mother's knee, had sung them in church, not once, but many times, +yet it seemed that until that moment no conception of their meaning had +penetrated to her brain. What was it, which was all we ought to ask? +"_Room to deny ourselves_!"--to put ourselves last--to be careless of +our own position? And this path of self-denial was the road that led to +God Himself? Was this what Evie had meant when she spoke of the secret +which each one must find out for herself? Was this the explanation of +the contentment which the Vicar had found in his ill-paying parish? +"_Room to deny oneself_!" Oh, but this had been far, far from her own +ambitions. She had asked for room to distinguish herself, to shine +among her fellows, to be first and foremost, praised and applauded. Her +own advancement had been the one absorbing aim in life, and to gratify +it she had been willing to see others fail, and to congratulate herself +in the face of their distress. Never once in all the miseries of +disappointment which she had undergone had it occurred to her that the +explanation of her difficulties lay in the _motive_ underlying her +efforts--the point of view from which she had started. Other girls had +worked as hard as herself, but with some definite and worthy aim, such +as to help their parents, or to fit themselves for work in life. Rhoda +was honest, even when honesty was to her own hurt, and she acknowledged +it had been far otherwise in her case when she had failed in her +examination, it had not been deficiency in knowledge which she had +deplored, but the certificate, the star to her name, the outward and +visible signs of success. When she realised the hopelessness of seeing +her name on the Record Wall, loss of honour and glory had been her +regret, not sorrow for the thought that she had passed through school +and failed to leave behind a tradition of well-doing whereby future +scholars might be strengthened and encouraged! + +Rhoda hid her face in the pillow and lay still, communing with her own +heart. How bitter they are, these moments of self-revelation! How +mysterious is the way in which the veil seems suddenly to lift and show +us the true figure, instead of the mythical vision which we have +cherished in our thoughts! They come suddenly at the most unexpected +moments, roused by apparently the most trivial of causes, so that the +friend by our side has no idea of the crisis through which we are +passing. + +Rhoda Chester never forgot that last morning at school; she could never +hear that hymn sung without a thrill of painful remembrance. When the +years had passed and she had daughters of her own, the sound of the +familiar words would still bring a flush to her cheeks, but no human +friend ever knew all that it meant to her. Rhoda learnt her lesson none +the less surely for keeping silence concerning it. + +A few hours later the travellers were ready to depart, and Evie was +carried down the staircase into the hall. + +Mrs Chester had promised that everything that wealth could secure +should be done for the comfort of her guest, and royally did she keep +her promise. If she had been a Princess of the Blood, Evie declared she +could not have had a more luxuriously comfortable journey. An ambulance +drove up to the door to convey the little party to the station, and +inside sat a surgical nurse, ready to give her skilled attention to any +need that might arise. The girls flocked in hall and doorway to wave +farewells, edging to the front to cry "Come back soon!" in confident +treble, and then retiring to the background to gulp back the tears which +rose at the sight of the thin little face, which told such a pathetic +story of suffering. Not a single tear did Evie see, however, nor any +face that was not wreathed in smiles, and when the strains of "For she's +a jolly good fellow" followed the ambulance down the drive, she laughed +merrily, and waved her handkerchief out of the window, never suspecting +with what swelling throats many of the singers joined in the strain. + +Rhoda laughed too, but she did not wave her handkerchief. Curiously +enough, it never occurred to her to think that she herself was included +in that farewell demonstration, or to resent the apparent indifference +with which she had been allowed to depart. Her own special friends had +embraced her warmly enough, but even they had given the lion's share of +attention to Evie, while the majority of the girls had no eyes nor +attention for anyone else. The Rhoda of six months or a year ago would +have bitterly resented such a slight, but to-day she found no reason to +blame others for following her own example. + +Evie was the supreme consideration, and the girl was so entirely +absorbed in looking after her comfort that she had forgotten all about +her own poor little importance. Love is the gentlest as well as the +cleverest of schoolmasters, and teaches his lessons so subtly that we +are unconscious of our progress, until, lo! the hill difficulty is +overcome, and we find ourselves erect on the wide, breezy plain. + +At the station a saloon carriage was waiting labelled "Engaged," inside +which were all manner of provisions for the comfort of the journey. +Hot-water bottles, cushions, rugs, piles of papers and magazines, and a +hamper of dainty eatables from the Chase Evie was wrapped in Mrs +Chester's sable cloak and banked up with cushions by the window, so that +she might look out and be amused by the sight of the Christmas traffic +at the various stations. She stared about her with the enjoyment of a +convalescent who has had more than enough of her own society, and the +lingerers on the platform stared back at the pretty, fragile-looking +invalid who was travelling in such pomp and circumstance. + +"They think I am a princess!" cried Evie. "I _hope_ they think I am a +princess!" and she laid her little head against the cushions, and +sniffed at a big silver-mounted bottle of smelling salts with an air of +languid complacency which vastly amused her companions. Presently nurse +lighted an Etna and warmed some cups of soup, while one good thing after +another came out of the hamper to add to the feast; then followed a +stoppage, with the arrival of obsequious porters with fresh foot- +warmers; then, dusk closing in over the wintry landscape, the lighting +of electric lamps, and the refreshing cup of tea. It was Evie's first +experience of luxurious travelling, and she told herself with a sigh +that it was very, very comfortable. Much more comfortable than +shivering in a draughty third class carriage, and changing three times +over to wait in still more draughty stations! + +With the arrival at Erley Chase came more pleasant surprises, for she +was not carried upstairs, but into a room on the ground floor, which was +ordinarily used as Mrs Chester's boudoir, and had been transformed into +the most cheerful and delightful of bedrooms. There was really little +to distinguish it from a sitting-room, except the bed with its silken +cover, and even this was hidden behind a screen in the daytime. A couch +was drawn up before the fire, and over it lay the daintiest pink silk +dressing-gown that was ever seen, with the warmest of linings inside, +and trimmed without with a profusion of those airy frills and laces dear +to the feminine heart. + +"For me?" gasped Evie, staring at its splendour with big, astonished +eyes. A glow of colour came into her cheeks as she turned it over and +over to inspect its intricacies. "I should think I _would_ come in to +dinner just, with such a gown to wear!" she cried laughingly. "I am +longing to put it on and see what it feels like to be a fashionable +lady." + +She would not acknowledge that she was tired, but even after an hour's +sleep she still looked so fragile that the two members of the household +who had not seen her before were deeply impressed with the change which +had taken place since their last meeting. Very charming did she look +when the sofa was wheeled into the dining-room, and she lay in her +pretty pink fineries the centre of attraction and attention; but the +flush of excitement soon faded, and the dark eyes looked pathetic in +spite of their smiles. Rhoda watched the faces of father and mother, +and her heart sank as she saw the elder man knit his brow, and the +younger look away quickly and bite his lip under his moustache as if the +sight were too painful to be endured. Beyond a few loving words at +greeting, neither had manifested any concern about herself, and once +again she had not noticed the omission. + +"I've had such a happy day. I feel like a princess--such a spoiled +princess!" said Evie, when she went to bed that night; but there were +sad days in store for the poor little princess from which all the care +and love of her friends could not save her. + +When the decree went forth that she should make her first attempt to +walk, Rhoda clapped her hands with joy, and could not understand the +reason of the quick, grave glance which the nurse cast upon her. She +and her mother had decided that the attempt must be made in the drawing- +room after tea, and nurse made no objection, hoping, perhaps, that the +presence of onlookers would give her patient extra strength for the +ordeal. She knew what it meant if the others did not; but, alas! they +all learned soon enough, as, at the first slight movement, Evie's white +face turned grey, and she groaned in mingled anguish and dismay. + +"I can't!" she cried; "Oh, I can't! It is like knives going through me! +I can't move!" + +"Ah, but you must, my dear. It has to be done; and the braver you are, +the sooner it will be over. You are bound to suffer the first few +times, but it would be ten times worse to allow the joint to stiffen. +Now be brave, and try to take just two steps with me! I will support +you on one side, and--" Nurse looked round questioningly--"Mr Harold +will take the other. You can lean all your weight on us. We won't let +you fall." + +Harold stepped forward without a word and put his strong arm under hers, +and, as he did so, Evie raised her eyes to his with a look which those +who saw it never forgot--a look such as might have been given by an +animal caught in a snare from which it was powerless to escape. Rhoda +told herself savagely that Harold was a brute to persist in the face of +that dumb appeal, but he did not quail even when the sob rose to a cry, +and a trembling plea for mercy. The two steps were taken, and +henceforth, for weeks to come, the nightmare of repeated effort weighed +upon the spirits of the household. At eleven o'clock, after tea, after +dinner--three times a day--was the inexorable programme repeated, in +spite of prayers and protestations. Mrs Chester's theory was that it +was brutal to torture the child, and that if she were to be lame, for +pity's sake let her be lame in peace. Rhoda suffered agonies of remorse +and passionate revolts against the mystery of pain, but the nurse and +her assistant never showed a sign of wavering. As a rule, Evie made a +gallant attempt to control her sufferings, but there were occasions when +even her fortitude gave was, as, on one afternoon, when, after taking a +certain number of steps, she was informed that still more must be +attempted. She was powerless in the hands that held her, but when she +collapsed into helpless sobbings on the sofa, Rhoda turned on her +brother with furious indignation: + +"You are a _brute_, Harold! You have no heart! How dare you do it--how +_dare_ you make her suffer so!" + +He did not answer, but turned his head aside, and stared steadily out of +the window. Rhoda glared at him with smarting eyes, and suddenly saw +something which put a check on her excitement. Harold's profile was +turned toward her, and the light showed great drops of moisture standing +upon the brow, and rolling slowly down the cheek. She realised, with a +pang, that once again she had been too quick in her judgment. In spite +of his firmness, Harold had suffered more than she, more than her +mother--ay, perhaps, more than Evie herself! + + + +CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR. + +ALL'S WELL THAT ENDS WELL. + +Despite the painful incidents of Evie's convalescence, Christmas was a +happy season at Erley Chase, for it had always been a tradition of the +household to make much of this festival, and Mrs Chester could not +bring herself to change her habits as the years advanced. Every twenty- +sixth of December Mr Chester would say solemnly, "This is the last +time! I cannot let you wear yourself out like this. When Christmas +cards have to be sent off by the hundred, and presents by the score, it +is time to call a halt, for what has been a pleasure becomes a burden. +Next year you drop these outside people, and think only of our immediate +circle," and Mrs Chester would murmur meekly, "Yes, dear; of course. +Just as you wish," and begin laying in stores for next Christmas at her +first visit to the January sales. There was a cupboard in one of the +spare rooms which was dedicated entirely to the keeping of presents, and +into it went all manner of nick-nacks which were picked up during the +year--bazaar gleanings, in the shape of cushions, cosies, and table- +cloths, relics of travel, and a hundred and one articles useful and +ornamental, which had been bought because they were so cheap, and it +really seemed wicked to leave them lying on the shop counter! When a +need arose, as when a birthday was suddenly remembered the day before it +fell due, or an anniversary suggested the propriety of a little +offering, it was the easiest thing in the world to poke about in the +cupboard until a suitable gift was discovered. + +Laura Everett was much amused by this novel way of apportioning +presents, which was so strangely different from that practised at her +own home. When she was wheeled into the morning-room a few days before +Christmas, it was to find a small bazaar of fancy articles spread on +tables and sofas, while Mrs Chester sat checking off the names written +on a long sheet of paper, and Rhoda cried out: "Here's a yellow silk +cushion. Whom do we know who has got a complexion that can bear being +set off against a background of sulphur yellow?" ... "Here's a gorgeous +table centre, quite beautifully worked. Whom do we know who is old- +fashioned enough to use table centres still?" ... "Here's a piece of +Turkish embroidery, which would be the very thing to cover that shabby +old sofa at the Vicarage; it was absolutely in holes the last time I saw +it." + +"Turkish embroidery--Mrs Mason. Thank goodness, that's one thing +settled! Wrap it up at once, Rhoda dear. It will be one thing less to +do," cried Mrs Chester in a tone of relief, while Evie held up her +hands in astonishment. + +"Of all the extraordinary ways of giving presents! To have a room full +of things and then to puzzle as to whom you can give them! This is +indeed a new experience for me. When we talk over our presents at home +it is to wonder how in the world we can contrive to buy twenty things +for nineteen shillings. Such a wholesale way of managing things I never +imagined in my wildest moments." + +She gave a little sigh of envy as she looked at the lavish profusion +which lay around; yet, after all, there was a pleasure in contriving +those simple gifts--in putting in delicate stitches to add to the value +of cheap materials, a triumph in manufacturing something out of nothing, +which Rhoda and her mother could never enjoy! She was not at all sure +that that old home fashion was not the sweeter after all. + +While the apportioning of gifts was going on in the morning-room, the +cook and her kitchen maids were busy at work in the great nagged +kitchen, manufacturing all sorts of dainties to be packed away in the +hampers ranged in readiness along the walls. It was a sight to see the +good things laid out on the tables, and Evie was carried down on her +chair to admire and praise with the rest, and to watch the interesting +process of packing. Far and wide these hampers went, carrying good +cheer into many a home where otherwise there would have been scanty +provisions for the day of rejoicing, and bringing unexpected gleams of +sunshine to many an anxious heart. Needless to say, one of the best was +addressed to a country parsonage especially dear to Evie's heart, and +was accompanied by a parcel of presents, which had not been lightly +bought, but worked by loving fingers during long hours of convalescence. + +Christmas Day itself was a busy occasion, when the home party had little +leisure to think of themselves, so unending was the stream of pensioners +which came up to the Chase to receive their gifts, and to be fed and +warmed in the gaily-decorated rooms. Dinner was served early, so that +the servants might be free to have their festivities in the evening, and +at nine o'clock all the employees on the estate came up, dressed in +their best, and danced with the servants in the hall. Mr and Mrs +Chester, with Harold and Rhoda, honoured the assembly by joining in the +first dance, and Evie sat in her wheeled chair, looking on and trying to +keep a smiling face, the while she fought one of the mental battles +which seemed to meet her on every step of the road to recovery. She had +been so much occupied grieving over the serious financial loss which her +inability to work would involve, that she had taken little thought of +the pleasures from which she was debarred; but, after all, she was but a +girl, and a girl with a keen capacity for enjoyment, and it was a very +keen pang which went through her heart as she listened to the seductive +strains of the band, and watched the couples glide slowly by. The dark +brows twitched as if in pain, and she drew aside the folds of the pink +tea-gown to cast a longing glance at the little useless feet stretched +before her. A sudden remembrance arose of the day when Rhoda protested +in dismay at the thought of wearing the ugly regulation school shoes, +and of her own confession of love for pretty slippers, of the +satisfaction with which she had donned the same on Thursday evenings, +and danced about the hall as blithely as any one of her pupils. Those +days were over--for ever over; she would never again know the joy of any +rapid, exhilarating motion. She lifted her hand to wipe away a tear, +hoping to escape observation the while, but, to her dismay, Harold stood +by her side, and his eyes met hers with an expression of pained +understanding. Any reference to her infirmity seemed to distress him so +acutely that the first instinct was to comfort him instead of herself, +and she smiled through her tears, saying in the sweetest tones of her +always sweet voice: + +"Don't, please! Don't look so sorry! It was babyish of me, but just +for one moment--I was so fond of dancing, you know, and I had never +realised before--" + +"Just so. You realise fresh losses every day. I know what you must +feel. You have not been babyish at all, but most brave and heroic." + +Evie sighed. "It's nice to be praised, but I feel as if I don't deserve +it. I am not in the least brave at heart... Sometimes I almost dread +getting strong, for then I shall have to face so much... I'm conceited, +too, for I hate the idea of limping, and being stiff and ungraceful. I +thought I did not care for appearance, but I did--oh, a great deal! It +is a humiliating discovery, and I am trying hard to cure myself, but +pride dies slowly! There was a girl at school who was lame. I used to +be so sorry for her, and yet, compared with other misfortunes, it is a +very little thing. I can still move about and use my faculties. It is +not so bad, after all!" + +"Yes," said Harold, unexpectedly. "It _is_ very bad. It is a mistake +to pretend to yourself that it is only a small trial, for it's not true, +and the pretence is sure to break down some day, and leave you where you +were. It is a great affliction for people to be crippled, even when +they are old and have lost their energy; but for a girl like you it is +ten times worse. Don't be too hard on yourself, and expect resignation +to come all at once. I believe the best plan is to face it fully, and +to say to yourself, `It's a big test--one of the biggest I could have to +bear. I shall feel the pinch not to-day only, but to-morrow, and the +next year, and as long as I live. It is going to take a big effort to +save myself from growing bitter and discouraged, but it's worth +fighting, for my whole life hangs on the result. If I can succeed--if I +can rise above infirmity, and keep a bright, uncomplaining spirit'--" + +He broke off suddenly, and Evie breathed a quick "Yes, yes, I know! I +feel that too. Thank you so much. It is good to talk to someone who +understands. It helps me on." + +"Don't thank me. It is like my presumption to venture to preach to you. +But you have helped me so much that when I saw you in trouble I could +not be silent. I was obliged to do what I could." + +"I--I have helped you?" repeated Evie, blankly; and a flush of colour +rose in her pale cheeks, which made her look for one moment the happy, +blooming girl of old. "In what way have I ever helped you, or been +anything but an anxiety and care?" + +But Harold did not answer, and that was the last chance of a _tete-a- +tete_ conversation that evening, for presently she was carried off to +her own room, and helped into bed, where she lay awake for a long, long +time, staring before her in the twilight, and recalling the lessons of +consolation to which she had just listened. It must surely have been +wonderfully wise, wonderfully true, since it did not so much comfort, as +do away with the very necessity for comfort! She could not delude +herself that she felt sad or despondent, or anything but mysteriously +happy and at rest, as she lay smiling softly to herself in the +flickering firelight. + +Two days later came a delightful surprise. Evie and her late pupil were +sitting in the morning-room writing letters of thanks to the many donors +of Christmas presents, when the door opened and shut, and someone walked +into the room. It was such an ordinary, matter-of-fact entrance that +neither of the writers troubled to look up, taking it for granted that +the new-comer was Mrs Chester, who had left the room but a few minutes +before. Two minutes later, however, Evie finished her sheet and lifted +her eyes to make a casual remark, when she promptly fell back in her +chair with a shriek, and a hand pressed over her heart. Rhoda jumped up +in alarm, and then--was it a dream, or did a well-known figure really +lean up against the mantelpiece, in familiar, gentlemanly attitude, a +roguish smile curling the lips, and little eyes alight with mischief? + +"Tom, Tom! Oh, Tom, you angel! Where in the world have you come from?" +cried Rhoda, rushing forward with outstretched arms, in a very whirlwind +of welcome. "How perfectly delicious to see you again, and what a +terrific start you gave me!" + +"Oh, what a surprise!" chanted Tom easily, rubbing her cheeks as if to +wipe away the kisses pressed upon it, and advancing to greet Evie with a +nonchalance which for once was a trifle overdone, though neither of her +friends was in the least danger of mistaking her real feelings. "The +same to you, and many of them," she continued, sitting down without +waiting for an invitation, and smiling round in genial fashion. "It +really was as good as a play, standing there, and watching you two +scribbling away with faces as solemn as judges--and what a squeal Evie +gave! It made me jump in my skin! Yes; I'm visiting my female +relative, and determined to pay you a visit even if it were only for an +hour. It can't be much longer, for we have a tea fight on this +afternoon, when every spinster in the neighbourhood is coming to stare +at me and deliver her views on higher education. Such a lark! Some of +them strongly approve, and others object, and I agree with each in turn, +until the poor dears are so bamboozled they don't know what to do. They +think I am an amiably-disposed young person, but defective in brains, +and poor aunt Jim gets quite low in her mind, for she wants me to +impress them, and branch off into Latin and Greek as if they came more +naturally to me than English. I wish they did! It takes the conceit +out of one to go up to college and compete with women instead of girls." + +"Don't you like it, Tom? Are you happy? Didn't you miss the Manor, and +feel home-sick for the girls and the old school parlour?" queried Rhoda +eagerly, and Tom screwed up her face in meaning fashion. + +"Should have done, if I had not kept a tight hand; but you know my +principle--never to worry over what can't be cured! Plenty to bother +oneself about, without that. I thought of you all a great deal, and +realised that I'd been even happier than I knew, and that I disliked +taking a bottom place so abominably that it was plainly the best thing +for me to do. I love power!" sighed Tom, wagging her head in sorrowful +confession, "and that's just what I see no chance of getting again for a +precious long time to come. I haven't much time to grieve, however, for +my poor little nose is fairly worn away, it's kept so near to the +grindstone." + +"You look thinner," said Rhoda, truthfully enough. "Poor old Tom, you +mustn't let them wear you out. We will take care of you, at least, so +I'll go and order lunch earlier than usual, if you really must be off so +soon. The three o'clock train, I suppose?" + +"Yes, please. Don't worry about anything special for me. Half a dozen +cutlets or a few pounds of steak is all I could eat, I assure you!" said +Tom modestly, and Rhoda went laughing out of the room, leaving her two +friends gazing at one another in an embarrassed silence. + +No reference had so far been made to the accident which was the cause of +Evie's presence at the Chase, but it was impossible that the visit +should end in silence, and both instinctively felt that Rhoda's absence +gave the best opportunity for what must be said. The colour came into +Evie's face as she nerved herself to open the painful subject. + +"You know, of course, Tom, that I am not going back to Hurst. Miss +Bruce has been most kind, but she must consider the good of the greater +number, and this accident has shown more plainly than ever the necessity +of having a House-Mistress who can job in the games with the girls. I +shall never be any good for a large school again, for, even apart from +the games, the long stairs and corridors would be too trying. So you +see my career is cut off suddenly." + +"Yes, I see; I thought of that. It's very interesting!" said Tom in a +dreamy voice, which brought a flush of indignation into Evie's eyes. + +"Interesting!" she repeated. "Is _that_ what you call it? It's not the +word I should have used, or have expected from you, Tom, or from any of +my friends." + +"No! Perhaps not, but it _is_ interesting all the same, for one is so +curious to see what will happen next. When you have planned out your +life, and fitted in everything towards one end, and then suddenly, by no +fault of your own, that end is made impossible--why, if you believe in a +purpose in things, what could be more interesting and exciting? What +_is_ to happen next? What is one to do? It is like reading a story in +parts, and breaking off just at the critical crisis. I should like to +turn over the pages, Evie, and see what is going to happen to you!" + +Evie smiled faintly. + +"Would you, Tom? I am afraid I have been hiding my head like an +ostrich, and trying not to look forward, but your view is the healthier, +and I'll try to adopt it. I don't give up all idea of teaching, though +big schools are impossible. Perhaps they would take me at some small, +old-fashioned seminary where sports are considered unladylike, and the +pupils take their exercise in a crocodile up and down the parade." + +"Ugh!" said Tom, with a grimace which twisted every feature out of +recognition. "No, surely, Evie, you will never condescend to that! You +lie low for a bit and get strong, and keep up your classics, and I'll +see if I can't find you some coaching to do among the girls I meet. If +you could get along that way for a few years it would be all right, for +I shall be settled by that time and able to look after you. You shall +be my secretary, dear, and have a jolly little den to yourself, where I +can take refuge when the girls get too much for me. We could be very +happy together, you and I, couldn't we, and grow into two nice, +contented old maids, with too much to do to have time to envy our +neighbours?" + +She fixed her bright little eyes on Evie's face as she asked the +question, and to her horror and dismay Evie felt the colour rush to her +cheeks and mount higher and higher in a crimson tide which refused to be +restrained by the most desperate mental efforts. How idiotic to blush +at nothing--how senseless, how humiliating, and how quite too ridiculous +of Tom to turn aside and stare at the opposite side of the room in that +ostentatious manner! Evie felt inclined to shake her, but at that +opportune moment Rhoda returned, and during the remainder of Tom's visit +there was no opportunity for private confidences. + +Once more Rhoda accompanied her friend to the station, and waited +anxiously for the word which would surely be said concerning the +escapade which had cost so dear, but, like Evie, she was obliged to +introduce the subject herself. + +"Have you nothing to say to me, Tom?" she asked wistfully. "I haven't +seen you since--you know when--but, of course, you heard how it +happened. It was all my fault. What are you going to say to me about +it?" + +"Why, nothing, Fuzz!" said Tom, turning her little eyes upon the +quivering face with a tenderness of expression which would have been a +revelation to casual acquaintances who believed Miss Bolderston +incapable of the softer emotions. "Why should I? You have said it all +to yourself a hundred times better than I could have done, and who am I +that I should make myself a ruler or a judge over you?" + +"But she is lame, you know!" said Rhoda, sadly. "Nurse says the knee is +stronger than she expected, but even so she will always limp. Imagine +Evie limping! She was such a graceful little thing, and tripped about +so lightly, and she was so proud of her little feet--I have spoiled her +future too, for she can never take such a good post again. I have +ruined her whole life." + +"We will discuss that point ten years later; it is too early to decide +it yet. Many things happen that we do not expect," remarked Tom sagely, +whereat Rhoda shook her head in hopeless fashion. + +"I cannot imagine anything happening that would make this any better--on +the contrary, Tom, it has made me realise how little help one can give, +and what a fraud money is when it comes to the test. I used to imagine +that I could do pretty nearly everything I wanted because I was rich, +but look at Evie! I would give my life to help her, but beyond a few +trumpery presents, and a little lightening of pain, what can I do? She +would not accept more, and one dare not offer it, though if she would +allow it we would be thankful to pension her off for life. Money can't +do everything I see!" + +"That's a good thing! Let's be thankful for that, at least. It's worth +something to have learned that lesson," cried Tom cheerily, and for the +rest of the way to the station she talked resolutely on indifferent +subjects, refusing to be drawn back to the one sad topic. Only when the +last good-bye was said did she soften into tenderness, actually allowing +herself to be kissed without protest, and saying hurriedly in a low, +half-shamed voice: + +"Good-bye, Fuzzy. Bless you! Never say die. Sometimes, you know, it +takes a big thing to open one's eyes. Keep straight ahead from where +you are now, and you'll have no more tumbles." Then the train moved off +and Rhoda lost the last glimpse of her friend in a mist of tears. Dear +Tom! Dear, blunt, kindly, honest Tom; what a strength she had been to +all who knew her--what a strength she was going to be to generations of +girls to come! Rhoda looked forward into the future and prophesied to +herself that she would know no prouder boast than that she had been one +of Tom Bolderston's girls, and had been brought up under her rule! + +That evening the occupants of the drawing-room looked up in amaze as a +rustle of silken garments struck their ears, and a stately young lady +came forward with a fan waving in one hand, and masses of ruddy hair +piled high upon her head. Rhoda, of course; and yet, could it be Rhoda? +for with the short skirts and flowing mane the last traces of childhood +had disappeared, and the woman of the future seemed already to stand +before them. Mr Chester gave a quick exclamation, and Rhoda turned to +him and swept a stately curtsey. + +"At your service, sir. I thought you might like to see your grown-up +daughter. My new dress came home to-day, and I looked so fine in it +that I was obliged to do up my hair to be in keeping. And I went to +mother's room and stole her pearls and took her very best fan. When +girls come out they always help themselves to their parents' fineries, +so I thought I had better begin at once. Do you like me, dear?" + +She looked up at him, half shy, half laughing, and there was silence in +the room while each of the onlookers felt a thrill of unexpected +emotion. It was like looking on at the turning point in a life, and the +girl was so beautiful in her fresh young bloom that it was impossible to +behold her unmoved. The coiled-up hair showed the graceful poise of her +head, the shoulders were smooth and white as satin, the blue eyes had +lost their hard self-confidence, and shone sweet and true. Yes! Rhoda +was going to be a beautiful woman; she was one already, as her father +realised, with a natural pang of regret mingling with his pride. His +eye softened as he laid his hand on her shoulder. + +"Yes, my daughter, you are grown-up indeed! I never realised it before. +You had better prepare for the duties of chaperon, mother, for I +foresee that this young lady will keep us busy. We shall have to take +her about, and entertain her friends, and yawn in the corners while they +dance half through the night. That's it, isn't it, Rhoda?" + +Rhoda looked at him with a start of surprise. By tacit agreement +nothing had yet been said of future arrangements, so that this was the +first definite hint which she had received of her parents' intention. +Her voice was half regretful, half relieved, as she said: + +"Then I am not to go back to school, father? You have decided that it +is better not?" + +Mr Chester put his hands on her arms and looked at her fondly, a +remembrance rising in his mind as he did so of that other evening +eighteen months ago, when the prospect of school had been proposed, and +the girl had taken up the question and settled it out of hand, in +arrogant, youthful fashion. It was a very different tone in which the +present question was asked, and he was quick to note the difference. + +"What do you say, mother? She doesn't look very much like a school-girl +to-night, does she? No, Rhoda, I think those days are ended. You have +had a year and a half at school, and it has been a valuable experience +for you in many ways, but both your nerves and ours have been +overstrained lately, and we will not risk any more separations, but try +what travel will do to complete your education. It has always been my +dream to go abroad for a year when you were able to come with us, and +now that time has arrived. We will plan out a tour that shall be both +pleasant and educational, and enlarge our minds by learning something +about other countries besides our own." + +"Rome for Easter, the Italian lakes and Switzerland in summer, the +Riviera and Egypt in winter--Oh, father, how lovely! _How_ I shall +enjoy it! How happy we shall be travelling about all together! I could +not have told you what I wanted, but this is the very thing of all +others I should most enjoy. And mother will like it too? It will not +tire you, will it, dear, or worry you to be away from home?" + +"My home is where you are. I shall be perfectly happy, dear, so long as +we are together," said the mother, who had never been known to oppose +her own wishes to those of her family; and in this easy fashion the +matter was settled. One moment the project was mooted, the next dates +and routes were being eagerly discussed, and the question of wardrobe +being taken into account. Presently Mr Chester must needs consult the +atlas which was in constant reference in every conversation, and away +went the three in happy conclave to turn over the leaves on the library +table, while Evie was left to look after them with wistful eyes, and +Harold to study her face in his turn. She turned to find his eyes fixed +upon her, and struggled hard to speak brightly. + +"They all seem so happy--it is good to see them; and how pretty Rhoda +looks to-night! It is so interesting to see the girls grow up, and come +out as full-fledged young ladies. I've seen two transformations to- +day--Rhoda and Tom!" + +"Miss Bolderston? Really! Would you call her a transformation?" +queried Harold, raising his eyebrows with an expression which said all +that he dare not put into words. "If that is a transformation, one is +tempted to wonder what she was like before--" + +"Don't!" Evie looked at him pleadingly. "Don't make fun of her, +please, because we love her so dearly. Men don't appreciate Tom, and +she doesn't show her best side to them, but she is a splendid girl, and +the truest of friends. She was so kind to me to-day." + +"You were talking to her about your work, and worrying because you could +not go back at once!" said Harold shrewdly, and Evie looked at him under +raised, apologetic eyebrows, quite overcome at being read in so easy a +fashion. + +"Well--just a little! I said that I could not go back to Hurst, as I +should not be able to take part in games again--" + +"And she sympathised with you, and agreed that it was a desperate lot?" + +"No, indeed! You don't know Tom! She is far too much of an optimist to +see the black side. She only said she was interested to see what would +happen next, and that it was like being stopped suddenly in the middle +of a story. I thought it was a very cheerful way of looking at it." +She paused, not caring, for some indefinite reason, to say anything of +that later proposition, in the carrying out of which she and Tom were to +grow old side by side; but the idea lay on her mind, and presently she +added dreamily, "But, even if I _am_ lame, my mind is not affected. I +can teach just as well as ever. There must be an opening for me +somewhere. There are plenty of small schools where they don't go in for +sports, plenty of girls who have to be educated at home--delicate girls, +backward girls, girls who are, perhaps, like myself! I could teach them +still if they would let me try--" + +It was a very sweet little voice, and the quiver with which it broke off +sounded strangely pathetic in the silence. Harold did not speak, and +his head was bent forward so that Evie could not see his face. His +hands were clasped and pressed so tightly together that the muscles +stood out under the skin, but presently one of them was stretched +forward and laid pleadingly over her own. + +"Dearest and sweetest," said Harold softly; "teach me instead!" + +When Rhoda came rushing into the room ten minutes later it was to find +her brother seated by Evie on the sofa, and to meet two pairs of eyes +which tried vainly to look calm and composed, but which were in reality +so brimming over with happiness that the news was told without need of a +single word. + +"Oh!" she cried, stopping short and staring in astonishment. "_Oh_!" +and then Evie struggled to her feet and held out wide, welcoming arms. + +"Oh, Rhoda, I am never going to be unhappy any more. Harold won't let +me. He is going to help me all my life!" + +"She is going to help _me_!" corrected Harold firmly. "I'm the happiest +fellow in the world, Rhoda, and you must be happy too. Come and kiss +your new sister." + +Rhoda gave a little sob of joy, and flew into Evie's arms. + +"My own sister! And I can take care of you always. I shall have a +right, and you will not have to worry any more, or be anxious, or +troubled. Evie, Evie, you can forgive me now, you can feel that I have +not spoiled your life! You will be happy even if you are lame!" + +"Yes, she will be happy--she has found a good man to take care of her!" +said Mrs Chester, coming forward from the background, and taking Evie +into a warm embrace. "My dear child, I thought, I hoped, it might come +to this! Once upon a time I was afraid I might be jealous of Harold's +wife, but not you, dear, not you! That would be impossible. We owe you +too much. You are welcome--a thousand times welcome! I am a rich woman +indeed, for I have two beautiful daughters instead of one!" + +Evie dropped her head on the broad, motherly shoulder and shed a tear of +pure happiness and thankfulness. + +"Tom was right!" she said to herself softly. "Tom was right--it was too +early to judge! Good has come out of evil!" + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Tom and Some Other Girls, by +Mrs. George de Horne Vaizey + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK TOM AND SOME OTHER GIRLS *** + +***** This file should be named 21102.txt or 21102.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/2/1/1/0/21102/ + +Produced by Nick Hodson of London, England + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, +set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to +copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to +protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. 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