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diff --git a/26478.txt b/26478.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..5f0e15b --- /dev/null +++ b/26478.txt @@ -0,0 +1,6614 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Wallypug in London, by G. E. Farrow + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Wallypug in London + +Author: G. E. Farrow + +Release Date: August 29, 2008 [EBook #26478] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE WALLYPUG IN LONDON *** + + + + +Produced by David Edwards, Anne Storer and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This +file was produced from images generously made available +by The Internet Archive) + + + + + +Transcriber's Note: Table of Contents added. + + * * * * * + + + + + [Illustration: THE WALLYPUG IN LONDON + By G. E. FARROW.] + + + + +THE WALLYPUG IN LONDON + + + + + [Illustration: HIS MAJESTY ARRIVES AT WINDSOR. SEE PAGE 143] + + + + + THE + WALLYPUG IN LONDON + + BY + G. E. FARROW + AUTHOR OF "THE WALLYPUG OF WHY," "THE MISSING PRINCE," ETC + + + ILLUSTRATED BY ALAN WRIGHT + + + METHUEN & CO. + 36 ESSEX STREET, W.C. + LONDON + 1898 + + + + + CONTENTS + + CHANT ROYAL + PREFACE + I HIS MAJESTY AND SUITE ARRIVE + II THE NEXT DAY'S ADVENTURES + III SUNDRY SMALL HAPPENINGS + IV LOST + V AN 'AT HOME' AND THE ACADEMY + VI THE JUBILEE + VII MORE ADVENTURES + VIII HIS MAJESTY IS INTERVIEWED + IX THE WALLYPUG'S OWN + X THE WALLYPUG GOES TO WINDSOR + XI HIS MAJESTY AT THE SEASIDE + XII THE DEPARTURE + + + + +CHANT ROYAL + +ADDRESSED TO + +HER MOST GRACIOUS MAJESTY QUEEN VICTORIA + +IN COMMEMORATION OF 22ND JUNE, 1897 + + + VICTORIA! by grace of God our Queen, + To thee thy children truest homage pay. + Thy children! ay, for Mother thou hast been, + And by a mother's love thou holdest sway. + Thy greatest empire is thy Nation's heart, + And thou hast chosen this the better part. + Behold, an off'ring meet thy people bring; + Hark! to the mighty world-sound gathering + From shore to shore, and echoing o'er the sea, + Attend! ye Nations while our paeans ring-- + Victoria's children sing her Jubilee. + + The grandest sight the world hath ever seen + Thy kingdom offers. Clothed in fair array, + The Majesty of Love and Peace serene, + While hosts unnumbered loyalty display, + Striving to show, by every loving art, + The day for them can have no counterpart. + Lo! sixty years of joy and sorrowing + For Queen and People, either borrowing + From other sympathy, in woe or glee, + Hath knit their hearts to thine, wherefore they sing-- + Victoria's children sing her Jubilee. + + With royal dignity and gracious mien + Thine high position thou hast graced alway; + No cloud of discord e'er hath come between + Thy nation and thyself; the fierce white ray + That beats upon thy throne bids hence depart + The faintest slander calumny can dart. + Thy fame is dear alike to churl and king, + And highest honour lies in honouring + The Sovereign to whom we bend the knee; + "God save the Queen," one strain unvarying-- + Victoria's children sing her Jubilee. + + What prophet, or what seer, with vision keen, + Reading the message of a far-off day, + The wonders of thy reign could have foreseen, + Or known the story that shall last for aye? + A page that History shall set apart; + Peace and Prosperity in port and mart, + Honour abroad, and on resistless wing + A steady progress ever-conquering. + Thy glorious reign, our glorious theme shall be, + And gratitude in every heart upspring-- + Victoria's children sing her Jubilee. + + Behold, ye tyrants, and a lesson glean + How subjects may be governed. Lo! the way + A Woman teaches who doth ne'er demean + Her office high. Hark! how her people pray + For blessings on the head that doth impart + So wise a rule. For them no wrongs do smart, + No cruelties oppress, no insults sting, + Nor does a despot hand exaction wring; + Though governed, Britain's subjects still are free. + Gaze then--ye unwise rulers wondering-- + Victoria's children sing her Jubilee. + + ENVOY. + + Queen Mother, love of thee doth ever spring + Within thy children's hearts, a priceless thing, + Nor pomp nor state that falleth unto thee + Can ever rival this grand carolling-- + Victoria's children sing her Jubilee. + + G. E. FARROW + + + + + [Illustration: PREFACE] + + +MY DEAR LITTLE FRIENDS, + +You will no doubt be surprised to find this book commencing with a +perfectly serious poem, and one which probably some of you will find +a little difficulty in understanding. When you have grown older, +however, and happen to look at this little book again, you will be +glad to be reminded of the historic event which the poem commemorates. +Now, about ourselves, when I asked in my last book, _The Missing +Prince_, for letters from my little readers, I had no idea that I had +so many young friends, and I can hardly tell you how delighted I have +been at receiving such a number of kind letters from all parts of the +world. + +I do hope that I have answered everyone, but really there have been so +many, and if by mistake any should have been overlooked, I hope my +little correspondents will write again and give me an opportunity of +repairing the omission. + +Such charming little letters, and all, I am happy to find, really +written by the children themselves, which makes them doubly valuable +to me. + +And how funny and amusing some of them were to be sure! And what +capital stories some of you have told me about your pets. + +Some pathetic incidents too; as, for instance, that of 'Shellyback,' +the tortoise, whose little owner wrote a few months after her first +letter to say that poor 'Shellyback' was dead. + +I have been very happy to notice how fond you all seem of your pets, +for I have always found that children who make friends with animals +invariably have kind and good hearts. And the poor dumb creatures +themselves are always so ready to respond to any little act of +kindness, and are so grateful and affectionate, that I am sure it adds +greatly to one's happiness in life to interest oneself in them. + +One of my correspondents, aged eight, has embarrassed me very much +indeed by suggesting that I should "wait for her till she grows up," +as she should "so like to marry a gentleman who told stories." I hope +she didn't mean that I did anything so disgraceful; and besides, as it +would take nearly twenty-five years for her to catch up to me, she +_might_ change her mind in that time, and then what would become of +me. + +Some of my letters from abroad have been very interesting. One dear +little girl at Darjeeling, in India, wrote a very nice descriptive +letter, and concluded by asking me to write "something about the +stars," and speaking of new stories brings me to another subject that +I wish to talk to you about. + +You know that I spoke in my last book about writing a school story, +and one about animals. Well, when I found that so many of you wanted +to hear "more about the Wallypug," I was obliged to put these two +books aside in order to gratify your wishes. I hope that you will be +as interested in hearing about his Majesty this time as you were last. + +You will be sure to notice that the pictures are by another artist, +but Mr. Harry Furniss has been away from England for some months, and +so it has been impossible for him to illustrate this volume. Some +other time, perhaps, Dorothy and he will give us more of their work; +but in the meantime Mr. Alan Wright has been very interested in +drawing pictures for this book, and I hope you will be pleased with +his efforts. + +Now, about writing to me next time. When I asked you to address me +under care of my publishers, I did not realize that in the course of +business I might find it necessary to change them sometimes, and so to +avoid any possibility of confusion, will you please in future address +all letters to + + MR. G. E. FARROW, + c/o Messrs. A. P. WATT & SON, + Hastings House, + Norfolk Street, Strand. + +What am I to do with all the beautiful Christmas and New Year's cards +which I have received? Will you be vexed if, after having enjoyed +receiving them as I have done so much, I give them to the poor little +children at the hospitals to make scrap books with? I happen to know +how much they value and appreciate gifts of this kind, and by allowing +me to bestow them in this way, your pretty presents will be giving a +double happiness. + +Well, I must conclude this rather long letter now, or I shall be +accused of being tedious; but really it gives me almost as much +pleasure to write to you, as it does to receive your letters. +Good-bye. Don't forget that many of you have promised to write to me +again, and that I am always more than glad to welcome any new friends. + + Believe me, dear Children, + Yours affectionately, + G. E. FARROW + + + + + [Illustration: The Wallypug in London.] + +CHAPTER I + +HIS MAJESTY AND SUITE ARRIVE + + +A most extraordinary thing has happened; the Wallypug has been to +London! But there, I am forgetting that possibly you have never read +_The Wallypug of Why_, in which case you will, of course, know nothing +about his Majesty, and so I had better explain to you who, and what, +he is. + +To begin with, then, he is a kind of king of a place called Why, which +adjoins the mysterious kingdom of Zum. I am afraid, though, that if +you searched your atlases for a very long while you might not find +either of these places, for the geographers are so undecided as to +their exact position that they have not shown them on the maps at all. +Some little friends of mine, named Girlie and Boy, have been there, +however, and I can tell you, if you like, the way they went. This is +the way to Why: + + Just go to bed and shut your eyes + And count one hundred, one by one; + Perhaps you'll find to your surprise + That you're at Why when this is done. + +I say _perhaps_, because this only happens when you have been +particularly good all day, and _sometimes_ boys and girls are not +quite as good as they--but there, I won't say what I was going to, for +I am quite sure that it would not apply to you. This is the way to +Zum: + + Not when the moon is at its full, + But just a tiny boat-shaped thing, + You _may_ see Pierrot sitting there + And hear the little fellow sing. + If so, just call him, and he'll come + And carry you away to Zum. + +There, now, I've told you the way to go to both places, so that, if +you wish to, you can go there whenever you please. + +I am telling you all this because one day in the spring Girlie and +Boy, who live in another part of London, came to see me, and we had +been talking about these things for about the hundredth time, I should +think: for these children are never tired of telling me of all the +strange things which happened to them when they journey to these +wonderful places. In fact they were just arguing as to which was the +most interesting place to go to, Why or Zum, when my housekeeper, Mrs. +Putchy, came to the door with the unwelcome news that the carriage had +come for my little friends, and that it was time to say good-bye. +After they had gone I sat staring into the fire wondering where Why +could be, and if there was really such a person as the Wallypug, when +my little dog Dick, who had been lying on the rug before the fire, +suddenly jumped up, and barking excitedly, ran to the other end of the +study, where a picture, which I had bought the day before at an +auction sale, stood leaning against the wall. Now this picture had +been sold very cheap, because no one could tell at all what it was +about, it was so old and dusty, and the colours were so dark and +indistinct. I had bought it hoping that it might prove valuable, +and there it stood till it could be sent to be cleaned and restored. +Imagine my surprise then, when, on following Dick across the study, I +discovered that the colours in the picture had all become bright, and +were working one into the other in the most remarkable way, red +running into green, and blue into yellow, while a little patch of +black in the centre of the picture was whirling round and round in +quite a distracting manner. What could it all mean? I stared and +wondered, till, out of the confusion, there gradually grew shapes +which bore some resemblance to human beings, and, presently, I could +recognize quite distinctly, first a young man in knee breeches, +smiling in a particularly self-satisfied way, and escorting a large +fish, who was walking upright, with slippers on his tail, and who +wore a waistcoat and necktie. Then an amiable-looking old gentleman, +carrying a wand, who was followed by a curious little person, wearing +a crown and carrying an orb and sceptre. A particularly stiff and +wooden-looking soldier stood at the back of this strange group. Judge +of my amazement when, quite as a matter of course, the whole party +deliberately stepped out of the picture into the room, and, before I +could realize what had happened, the old gentleman with the wand came +forward with a flourish and an elaborate bow, and announced: + +"A-hem! his Majesty the Wallypug of Why and suite." + + [Illustration: WITH SLIPPERS ON HIS TAIL] + +I was so astonished that for the moment I could not think what to say, +but at last I managed to stammer, as I made a low bow to the +Wallypug: + +"I am delighted to make your Majesty's acquaintance." + +The Wallypug smiled very affably, and held out his hand. + +"I have come up for the Jubilee, you know," he said. + +"_We've_ come up, you mean to say, Wallypug," corrected the old +gentleman with the wand, frowning somewhat severely. "I am the +Wallypug's professional adviser," he continued. "I am called the +Doctor-in-Law--allow me to introduce the rest of our party. This," he +went on, bringing the young man with the self-satisfied smile forward, +"is the Jubilee Rhymester from Zum; he hopes to become a minor poet in +time. And this," indicating the wooden-looking soldier, "is Sergeant +One-and-Nine, also from Zum." Here the Doctor-in-Law took me aside and +whispered in my ear, "Slightly cracked, crossed in love; speaks very +peculiarly; capital chap though." Then crossing to where the Fish was +standing, he said, "And this is A. Fish, Esq., the celebrated lecturer +on the 'Whichness of the What as compared with the Thatness of the +Thus.' He desired to accompany us here in order to find material +for a new lecture which he is preparing upon the 'Perhapness of the +Improbable.' He's awfully clever," he whispered impressively. + + [Illustration: "HIS MAJESTY THE WALLYPUG"] + +"I'm sure I'm delighted to see you all," I said, shaking hands with +each one till I came to the Fish, who held out a fin. "Er-er-how do +you do?" I stammered, somewhat taken aback by this strange proceeding. + +"Quide well with the egscebtiod of a slide cold id by head," said the +Fish. "I'b subjecd to theb, you doe. It's beig id the water so butch, +I fadcy," and he _smiled_. + +I don't know if you have ever seen a fish smile, but if not I may tell +you that it is a very curious sight. + +"I suppose you can manage to put us up here for a month or two?" +calmly suggested the Doctor-in-Law after a pause. + +"Dear me," I exclaimed in alarm, "I don't think my housekeeper could +possibly--" + +"Why not ask her?" suggested the Doctor-in-Law, touching the bell. + +A moment or two afterwards a knock at the door announced that Mrs. +Putchy was there. + +"Oh, Mrs. Putchy," I said, stepping just outside, "these gentlemen, +er--that is to say, his Majesty the Wallypug of Why and suite, have +honoured me with a visit, and I am anxious if possible to offer them +such hospitality as my poor home affords. Do you think that we could +manage anyhow to find room for them, for a few days at any rate?" + +Now Mrs. Putchy is a very remarkable woman, and I have never known her +to show the slightest surprise at anything, and, so far from seeming +alarmed at the prospect of having to entertain such notable visitors, +she seemed positively delighted. + +"His Majesty of Why, sir? How charming! Of course we must do our best, +and how fortunate that I put on my best gown to-day, isn't it? Dear +me, and shall I be presented to his Majesty?" + +"Certainly, Mrs. Putchy, if you wish it," I said. "In fact, if you +will call General Mary Jane, I will introduce you both, as you +represent my entire household." + +Mrs. Putchy disappeared, returning almost immediately, followed by the +servant, General Mary Jane, with her mouth wide open, and accompanied +by the cat, who rejoices in the extraordinary name of Mrs. Mehetable +Murchison. These members of my household were duly presented to the +Wallypug. Mrs. Putchy made her curtsey with great dignity, but General +Mary Jane was so overcome at the thought of being presented to royalty +that she fell flat on her hands and knees in her humility, while Mrs. +Mehetable Murchison, realizing, no doubt, the truth of the old saying +that "a cat may look at a king," went up and sharpened her claws on +the Wallypug's legs in the most friendly manner possible. + +It was when the cat caught sight of A. Fish, Esq., that she completely +lost her presence of mind, and with arched back and bristling fur +glared at him in amazement. + +"Priddy pussy, cub alog thed," said the Fish, stooping down and trying +to stroke her with one of his fins; but Mrs. Mehetable Murchison, with +a startled glance, tore out of the room, showing every sign of alarm. + +"And she's so fond of fish too, as a rule, ain't she, mum?" remarked +General Mary Jane, who had somewhat overcome the awe with which she +had at first regarded the presence of royalty. + +"Fod of fish?" repeated A. Fish, Esq., inquiringly. "What do you +mead?" + +"Why, you see, sir," explained Mrs. Putchy, "we often have fish for +dinner--er--that is to say--er--a-hem!" + + [Illustration: "PRIDDY PUSSY"] + +The Fish was glaring at her in a horrified way, and Mrs. Putchy had +become quite nervous. + +"Let's change the subject," suggested the Doctor-in-Law, to our great +relief. "The most important question for the moment is, where are we +all going to sleep?" + +This gave Mrs. Putchy an opportunity for exercising her wonderful +ability for management, and after arranging for the Wallypug to have +the spare bedroom, and the Doctor-in-Law to have my room, I was to +have a bed made up in the study, while the Jubilee Rhymester was to +sleep in the attic, One-and-Nine was to have a box under the stairs, +and there only remained A. Fish, Esq., to dispose of. + +"There is the bathroom, mum," suggested General Mary Jane brilliantly; +"we could put a lid on the bath and make up a bed there." + +"Bedder sdill, fill id with wadter, ad thed I could sleeb _in_ id," +suggested the Fish. + +"Oh yes, of course!" said Mrs. Putchy, "and now I must go and see +about the supper." And, with a low curtsey to the Wallypug, the +admirable little woman hurried out, followed by General Mary Jane, who +gave a nervous little bob when she reached the door. + +They had scarcely disappeared before One-and-Nine came up to me and +whispered: + +"I am muchly impressionated by that lady with the most militaryish +name who has just gone out. Can you kindly inform me is she +detached?" + +"Detached?" I inquired in bewilderment. "What ever do you mean?" + +"If a person is not attached to anyone else, they are detached, I +suppose, are they not?" said One-and-Nine rather impatiently. + +"Well, if you put it that way, I suppose they are," I replied, +laughing. "You mean, has she a sweetheart? Well, really I don't know. +I have an idea though that Mrs. Putchy does not allow followers." + +"Then I shall considerize my prospectuousness with great hopefulosity!" +remarked the soldier with considerable dignity, walking back to the +Wallypug's chair. + +"What does he say?" asked the Jubilee Rhymester. "He is a little bit +cracked, you know. Could you make out what he was driving at?" + +"Oh, yes, I could understand within a little what he meant," I +replied. "He seems to have fallen in love with General Mary Jane at +first sight, from what I can gather." + +"Really! Dear me! He is always doing that sort of thing, do you know, +and he generally asks me to write poems for him when he gets into that +state. I have written as many as 137 odes in one month on his behalf." + +"Good gracious," I replied, "and does he pay you well for them?" + +"Pay me!" exclaimed the Jubilee Rhymester, staring at me in surprise. +"Of course not. Do people ever get paid for writing poetry?" + +"Why, yes, to be sure they do," I answered. + +"Well, I've never heard of such a thing in all my life," said the +Jubilee Rhymester; "I always thought that poets had to pay to have +their verses used at all, and that that was why they were always so +poor while they were alive. Of course I knew that people sometimes +made a fuss about them after they were dead, but I have never heard +of such a thing as a live poet being paid for his work." + +"Nonsense," I replied; "I believe that quite a lot of money is +sometimes paid by the magazines and other papers for poems and +verses." + +"Well, I am delighted to hear it," said the Jubilee Rhymester, "and I +shall certainly start writing to-morrow. I have no doubt whatever that +I shall make my fortune before I go back to Zum." + +Shortly after this Mrs. Putchy announced that supper was served, and +a little later my guests retired to rest, being thoroughly tired out +with their long journey. I sat up in my study a little while longer to +smoke a pipe, but was just thinking of going to bed when there was a +tap at the door and the Doctor-in-Law entered. + +"I say, I thought I had better come and arrange with you about money +matters," he said; "I didn't like to mention such things before the +others. Now then," he continued, "how much are you going to pay us for +staying with you?" + +"Pay _you_!" I gasped. "What on earth do you mean?" + +"Well, you see, it will be a great thing for you to have such +distinguished visitors, don't you know, and you ought to be quite +willing to pay liberally for the honour," said the Doctor-in-Law, +smiling amiably. + +Now Girlie had told me what a greedy, avaricious person the +Doctor-in-Law really was, despite his benevolent appearance, but this +cool cheek almost took my breath away. I was determined, however, to +let him see at once that I was not to be imposed upon, so I said as +firmly as I could, "Now, look here, Mr. Doctor-in-Law, please understand +once and for all, that as you were all so kind to my little friend +Girlie when she was at Why, I am quite willing to entertain his Majesty +the Wallypug, and the rest of you, to the very best of my ability, but +as for paying you for being here, the idea is absurd--impossible!" + + [Illustration: "ID QUIDE GAVE BE A TURN"] + +Just then a terrific hullabaloo in the passage caused us both to run +to the door. We could hear that the noise proceeded from the bathroom, +and, hurrying to the door, we found A. Fish, Esq., sitting up in the +water shouting for help, while Mrs. Mehetable Murchison and a whole +group of her feline friends were out on the tiles, glaring through the +window. + +"Dear be, dear be," panted the Fish, when he saw us, "I'b so +frighteded, just look at all those cats. I had beed to sleeb ad was +just dreabig that sobeone was sayig, 'Mrs. Behetable Burchison is _so_ +fod of fish, and we ofted have fish for didder,' whed I woke ub and +saw all those horrible cats lookig id ad the widdow; id quide gave be +a turn. Do drive theb away please." + +We soon did this, and, pulling down the blinds, we left A. Fish, Esq., +to his dreams and soon afterwards retired to rest ourselves. + + + + +CHAPTER II + +THE NEXT DAY'S ADVENTURES + + +When I entered the breakfast room the next morning I found that the +Wallypug and the Doctor-in-Law had been up for some time, and were +both gazing out of the window with the greatest of interest. + +"I hope your Majesty slept well," I remarked to the Wallypug as I +approached them. + +"Very well indeed, thank you," he replied smilingly. "The +Doctor-in-Law and myself have just been saying that we are sure to +have an enjoyable visit here. We have been greatly interested in the +man-machines going past. We have never seen anything like them +before." + +"The man-machines!" I exclaimed, puzzled to know whatever he could +mean. + +"Yes, the men with wheels instead of legs, you know." + +"Oh, you mean the bicyclists," I replied, laughing. "Have you really +never seen any before?" + +"No, indeed," replied his Majesty. "Are they born with wheels on, or +do they grow afterwards?" + +I laughed, and fortunately just then the youngster opposite, who +always rides to school on his bicycle, came out of doors wheeling his +machine, and I was able to explain to the Wallypug the principle upon +which they worked. + +"Dear me; the Doctor-in-Law told me that the machinery was part of the +man, but now I see that it is separate. And he charged me sixpence for +the information too," he complained, looking reproachfully at the +Doctor-in-Law. + +"Charged you sixpence!" I cried. + +"Yes," replied the poor Wallypug. "He offered to tell me all about +them for sixpence, and as I was really very curious to know I gave it +to him, and then he informed me that they were a peculiar race of +people who came from Coventry, and who were all born with wheels +instead of legs." + +"Take your old sixpence then, if you are going to make all that fuss +about it," said the Doctor-in-Law, crossly, throwing the coin down on +the table and walking out of the room in a huff. "I'm sure I did read +somewhere that they came from Coventry," he added, popping his head in +at the door and then slamming it violently after him. + +The boy opposite was still riding up and down the road, and I made up +my mind that although I had never spoken to him before, I would ask +him to let the Wallypug examine his bicycle more closely. + +"With pleasure," he replied, raising his hat politely to the Wallypug, +when I had explained who he was; "and if his Majesty would like to try +it he is quite welcome to do so." + +The Doctor-in-Law's curiosity had so far overcome his ill-humour that, +when he saw us talking to the boy, he came forward and offered to help +the Wallypug to mount. + +"I really don't think he had better," I said, "he might damage the +machine." + +"Oh no, he won't hurt it, I'm sure," said the boy generously; and so +with our united assistance the Wallypug got on to the bicycle, and +after a few preliminary wobblings started off in fine style. Faster +and faster he went, clinging desperately to the handle-bars, till we, +who were running beside him, could no longer keep pace with him. + + [Illustration: THE START] + +"I can't stop," we heard him shout; and a moment later he charged +straight at a large stone and half a brick which lay in the middle of +the roadway. + +Poor Wallypug! The sudden impact threw him right over the handle-bars, +and he landed in a huddled heap on his hands and knees in the gutter. +The machine flew in half, and the front portion careered madly away +by itself till stopped by the kerb. + +We hurried up to his Majesty to discover if he was much hurt, but, +with the exception of a few scratches on his hands and knees and a +thorough shaking, he seemed to have come off pretty well. + + [Illustration: THE FINISH] + +"I suppose we can't stick it together again?" he inquired, gazing +ruefully at the broken bicycle, and I was obliged to tell him that +there was not much chance of our doing so. The boy to whom it belonged +bravely made the best of the matter, especially when I told him that +the next half-holiday he had I would take him to Holborn to choose +another one in its place. + +And when I discovered that he had a half-holiday that very afternoon, +it was arranged that General Mary Jane should order a carriage at the +livery stable, and that we should all drive to the city after +luncheon. + +The Wallypug, after a good wash and a hearty breakfast, went to his +room to lie down for an hour or two to recover from the effects of his +accident, and I was just answering my morning letters when there was a +knock at the study door, and the Rhymester entered. + + [Illustration: HIPPETY-HOPPETY-PLOP] + +"I sat up most of the night writing poetry," he remarked, "and I have +just brought you one or two specimens. The first one is called 'The +Ode of a Toad.' Perhaps I had better read it to you. My writing is +rather peculiar," and he began as follows: + +THE ODE OF A TOAD. + + There was once an old toad who lived under a tree, + Hippety hop--Flippety flop, + And his head was as bald as bald could be, + He was deaf as a post and could hardly see, + But a giddy and frivolous toad was he, + With his hippety-hoppety-plop. + + And he gambolled and danced on the village green, + Hippety hop--Flippety flop, + In a way that had never before been seen, + Tho' he wasn't so young as once he had been, + And the people all wondered whate'er he could mean, + With his hippety-hoppety-plop. + + But the old chap kept bobbing about just the same, + Hippety hop--Flippety flop, + Till everyone thought he _must_ make himself lame, + And not a soul ever could find out his aim, + In keeping up such a ridiculous game, + As his hippety-hoppety-plop. + + Some said he was mad, tho' as mild as a dove, + Hippety hop--Flippety flop, + And as the result of a push or a shove, + Was a little bit cracked in the storey above, + _But I fancy myself the old boy was in love_, + With his hippety-hoppety-plop. + +"There! What do you think of it?" he asked when he had finished. + +"Well, candidly, I'm afraid not very much," I replied; "and what on +earth do you call it an ode for?" + +"Why, you see, ode went so well with the word toad. I was going to +call it 'Ode to a Toad,' but it isn't _to_ a toad at all, though it's +about a toad. Ah! by the bye, I might call it 'A Toad's Ode,' mightn't +I? I think that sounds very jolly." He altered the title in pencil. + + [Illustration: "I LOVE BUT THEE"] + +"I have another which I think you will say is very touching." And +after getting his handkerchief out in case he should be moved to +tears, he began: + +THE BALLADE OF A BUN. + + Don't talk to me of "Sally Lunn," + Or toasted tea-cake nice and hot, + I do not care for either one + A single solitary jot; + My heart is fixed and changeth not, + In all the world--whate'er I see, + And rich or poor--whate'er my lot-- + Oh! penny bun, I love but thee. + + For thy dear sake all cakes I shun + Smeared o'er with jam. No apricot + Or greengage tart my heart hath won; + Their sweetness doth but cloy and clot. + What marmalade in fancy pot + Or cream meringue, though fair it be, + Thine image e'er can mar or blot? + Oh! penny bun, I love but thee. + + I vowed to cherish thee, or none + (Such love thy simple charms begot), + When first I saw thee, precious one; + And now to some sweet lonely spot, + Some shady dell or mossy grot, + Come let us hasten, you and me, + And I will eat you like a shot; + Oh! penny bun, I love but thee. + + _Envoy._ + + Small boys or girls that homeward trot + From school in time for early tea, + This moral ne'er must be forgot: + "Love penny buns, and they'll love thee." + +"Isn't it affecting?" he inquired, wiping his eyes when he had +finished. + +"Well, perhaps I didn't quite appreciate the pathos of it as I might +have done," I answered, trying hard not to laugh. "You see I was +paying so much attention to the scansion. I find that you have altered +the refrain in the Envoy. Surely that's not correct, is it?" + +"Oh, you are a great deal too particular," remarked the Rhymester +crossly. "Why, I should think from the Doctor-in-Law's description of +a critic that you must be one." + +"What did he say a critic was?" I asked. + +"Why, he said a critic was a person who found fault with another, for +not doing what he was unable to do himself. And he charged me +fourpence three-farthings for the information, and as I only had +fourpence halfpenny I have to pay him the odd farthing when I sell +some of my poems. Can you tell me how I can set to work about it?" + +"Well, I hardly know," I replied, "unless you send them to the editors +of the various magazines. They may take them, but you must not be +disappointed if some of them are rejected. You see they cannot +possibly print everything that is sent to them." + +There were several magazines in the study, and I suggested that the +Rhymester should make a list of the addresses of the various editors, +and he was busy about that till luncheon time. + +At half-past two the carriage came to the door, and goodness only +knows what General Mary Jane must have told the livery stable people +about the Wallypug, for, evidently anxious to send an equipage worthy +of royalty, they had painted an enormous monogram in gold on the sides +of the carriage, while the coachman was resplendent in blue plush and +gold lace, with silk stockings and a powdered wig. + + [Illustration: "EQUIPAGEOUS GRANDIOSITY"] + +The Wallypug was delighted when he saw this elaborate turn-out, and +so were the others, for I overheard One-and-Nine murmuring something +about "equipageous grandiosity," as he climbed up to the seat beside +the coachman. When the Wallypug, the Doctor-in-Law, A. Fish, Esq., +and the Rhymester, were seated, there was no room left for the boy +and myself, so we followed behind in a modest dog-cart, which was +hurriedly procured from the livery stable. Many were the wondering +glances bestowed upon the carriage, with its somewhat remarkable +burden, as we drove along through Kensington to the Gardens. And +everywhere our appearance was hailed with enthusiasm, people being +evidently under the impression that the Wallypug was one of the royal +guests invited to the Jubilee festivities. Who could he be? That was +decidedly the question which everyone was asking, and I could not +quite determine who was causing the greater sensation, the Wallypug or +A. Fish, Esq. These two individuals, however, comported themselves +with the calmest dignity, only the Doctor-in-Law seemed flurried by +the attention which they attracted, and smiled and bowed right and +left, whether the people took any notice of him or not. + +As we approached Hyde-Park corner attention was diverted from the +Wallypug's carriage by the fact that _another_ royal equipage had +entered the Park gates; and as the Princess passed us, an amused +glance and a whispered conversation with the other occupant of the +carriage showed that the Wallypug's extraordinary party had not +escaped Her Royal Highness's attention. + +After going once round the Park we went out at the Marble Arch and +along Oxford Street to Holborn, our progress through the crowded +streets everywhere attracting the most excited interest. And when +we stopped before one of the large bicycle _depots_ in Holborn the +crowd around the carriage was so large that the policeman had quite a +difficulty in preventing a block in the traffic. Our business was soon +transacted, and, having secured an excellent machine for the boy in +place of the one which his Majesty had damaged in the morning, we +drove back to Kensington without further adventure. + +The Wallypug's curiosity, however, was so awakened by what he had seen +that, as soon as we had been refreshed by a cup of afternoon tea, he +suggested that we should go out for a walk; accordingly the whole +party proceeded to Kensington Gardens, followed by a curious and +somewhat derisive crowd of small boys, who would insist upon advising +the Wallypug to "get his hair cut." Now, I happened to know, from what +Girlie had told me about her adventures in Why, that the Wallypug, +though a kind of king, had to do as his people directed and not as he +liked, and that when he had presented a petition in Parliament to be +allowed to have his hair cut, they had divided upon the subject, and +so he had only been allowed to have _half_ of it cut, and as the long +half had by this time grown very long indeed, he certainly did look +rather remarkable; that was no excuse though for the street boys' +rudeness, and his Majesty very wisely took no notice of them. A. Fish, +Esq., came in for the greatest amount of attention, and when a few +drops of rain began to fall, and he put up an umbrella for fear that +he should get wet, the crowd became so excited that the Doctor-in-Law +wisely suggested that a return should be made. His Majesty, however, +was bent upon sight-seeing, and so the party separated, the +Doctor-in-Law, A. Fish, Esq., and One-and-Nine going home, while the +rest of us continued our walk. When we reached the Gardens, the +Wallypug was greatly interested in seeing the palace where the Queen +was born, and said that he should certainly petition his Parliament to +allow him to have soldiers walk up and down before the gates of his +palace, like those which he saw here. He admired greatly Princess +Louise's statue of the Queen, which stands in front of the palace, +and said he couldn't imagine where-ever they could have got all the +white sugar from to make it with, and I think that he was inclined to +disbelieve me when I told him that it was not made of sugar at all, +but of white marble; for he said that if that were the case he +couldn't think why they wanted to put such high railings around it, as +no one would wish to carry away a marble statue of that size, whereas, +if it were sugar, as he suggested, why, of course, the railings were +there to prevent the children from climbing up and breaking off little +pieces to eat. + + [Illustration: FOR FEAR HE SHOULD GET WET] + +The Round Pond and the little model ships interested His Majesty most +of all though, I fancy, and he spent quite a long time admiring them, +until, while assisting a small boy to get his ship ashore, he had the +misfortune to slip into the water himself, and had to be fished out +with the assistance of a boathook. + +His Majesty certainly did not look either dignified or regal as he +stood on the bank saturated with water, and his royal robes clinging +about him in the most woe-begone manner--and as the crowd had greatly +increased, I was very glad to get the poor Wallypug into a cab and +drive home. + +[Illustration: HIS MAJESTY HAS AN ACCIDENT] + +On our way there, the Rhymester, being very much afraid of getting his +clothes wet, sat in the furthest corner of the cab and amused himself +by writing a verse on the subject of his Majesty's misfortune, which +read somehow like this: + + "King George I've heard is King of Greece, + But since this luckless slipping, + The Wallypug I do declare + Should be the King of _Dripping_." + +I think his Majesty thought it rather unkind of the Rhymester to make +fun of him in this way, but before he had time to think much about +the matter, we had arrived at our destination, and to my great +surprise I could see a vast crowd collected at the doors of the +building in which my flat is situated. + + + + +CHAPTER III + +SUNDRY SMALL HAPPENINGS + + +Whatever could it all mean? The Doctor-in-Law stood on the steps, +calling out, "Walk up, walk up, ladies and gentlemen, and see the +Talking Fish," while large posters were pasted on the walls, bearing +the words, "Admission Sixpence" and "One day only." + +The Commissionaire who usually stands at the door was looking very +surprised and angry, while the page boy was grinning all over his +face. Whatever was happening? I hastily paid the cabman, and followed +by the Wallypug made my way through the crowd to the entrance. + +"Admission sixpence each," said the Doctor-in-Law, holding out his +hand. + + [Illustration: "WALK UP, WALK UP, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN"] + +"What do you mean?" I replied, "and what is all this crowd doing +here?" + +"Admission sixpence each!" repeated the Doctor-in-Law stubbornly, not +taking the least notice of my questions, and holding his wand across +the doorway so that I could not get in. + +"Nonsense!" I cried; "I'm not going to pay to go into my own house." + +"Pay for the Wallypug then and I'll let you in free," said the little +man insinuatingly. + +"I shall do nothing of the sort," I cried, pushing past him and +hurrying up the stairs. + +To my surprise I found my rooms occupied by strangers. Sergeant +One-and-Nine was reciting some of the Rhymester's poems in the dining +room to three deaf old ladies, two of whom had ear trumpets, while A. +Fish, Esq., was holding a kind of _levee_ in my study, seated in a +chair placed on the writing table, and was surrounded by an admiring +crowd of people who were asking all sorts of questions. + +Mrs. Putchy met me at the door. + +"Oh, sir!" she exclaimed. "I'm so glad you've come home. I haven't +known what to do with all these people." + +"But what does it all mean, Putchy?" I inquired. "What are they doing +here at all?" + +"Why, you see, sir!" said Mrs. Putchy, "Mr. Doctor-in-Law found that +A. Fish, Esq., was attracting a good deal of attention out of doors, +and he thought that it would be a capital idea to have a kind of show +here and charge sixpence admission to see him; and if there's been +one, I'm sure there's been a hundred people up here this afternoon. +The remarks they've been making too, and the questions they've been +asking. Why, one old lady, sir, wanted to know how much you paid A. +Fish, Esq., a week, and if I was _quite_ sure that you gave him enough +to eat. They've broken three chairs too, and that little Venetian +glass vase that stood on the bracket in the corner. And just now I +caught some little boys tearing pictures out of one of those +illustrated books you brought home last week." + +Here was a pretty state of affairs. The strangers had by this time +left A. Fish, Esq., and had collected around the poor Wallypug, who +had been waiting in his wet clothing in the hall, and I was obliged +to politely but firmly insist upon them at once leaving the house, +telling them that their money would be returned at the door. + +"I should think so, indeed," said one angry-looking stout lady. "Why, +the whole thing is a fraud and you ought to be thoroughly ashamed of +yourself. Talking fish indeed! I don't believe he's a fish at all--at +any rate, not what I call a 'fish,'" and she flounced down the stairs +only to return a moment or two afterwards to say, "I thought you said +that we were to have our money back." + +"So you are, madam," I replied. + +"Well, why don't you see that we get it then? That man downstairs +refuses to give me any money. The whole thing is a swindle. But I +don't mean to be defrauded in this way, I can tell you." + +I went downstairs and told the Doctor-in-Law that he must at once +return everyone their money, and this after a great deal of grumbling +he did, while the Commissionaire and the page boy tore down the +posters outside the door at my request. + +I explained to the Doctor-in-Law that this sort of thing must not +occur again, and made him promise that he would never again use my +rooms as a place in which to hold a show. + +I really felt rather annoyed about it, for I could not imagine +whatever the neighbours would think of me for permitting such a scene +to take place in my rooms, but it evidently was useless now to say +anything more about it. + +The next morning, despite the wetting which the Wallypug had received +at the Round Pond, his thoughts still ran upon boating, and nothing +would satisfy his Majesty but that he should go for a row. I suggested +Richmond as the best place to start from, and so we drove over +Hammersmith Bridge and across Barnes Common. + +Arrived at Richmond we had no difficulty in securing a nice boat. + +"I'll row for one," said his Majesty. + +"And I for another," said the Rhymester. + +"Very well then," I replied. "Perhaps the Doctor-in-Law will steer, +and so we will manage very nicely." + +Quite a large crowd had collected to see us start, and perhaps that is +what made the Wallypug so nervous; as it was, as soon as we pushed +off, his Majesty fell backwards with his feet sticking up above the +seat, while the Rhymester stuck one oar deep down into the water and +pulled it with all his might, while the other flourished about in the +air. + + [Illustration: HIS MAJESTY FELL BACKWARDS] + +The Doctor-in-Law's idea of steering consisted in pulling first one +string and then the other, and so we did not get along very well just +at first. + +When the Wallypug had picked himself up from the bottom of the boat, +however, and the Rhymester and he made another attempt, I think we +should have got along fairly well if the Doctor-in-Law, in trying +to get out of the way of a passing boat, had not steered us into the +bank, where we stuck fast in the mud till someone on the footpath very +kindly pushed us off again. After that I thought it best to take the +oars myself, and his Majesty steered under my direction. In this way +we managed to get a little way past Teddington Lock by luncheon time, +and having found an _eyot_ with no one on it we went ashore and +unpacked the hamper of good things which we had brought with us. + +It was a beautiful day, and I think that we all enjoyed the picnic +immensely. I know that I did for one, and so, I think, did his +Majesty, for after the meal he laid aside his crown and royal robes +and made himself comfortable on the grass under the trees, and looked +thoroughly happy with a big cigar in his mouth. + + [Illustration: HIS MAJESTY ENJOYS HIMSELF] + +A. Fish, Esq., busied himself in preparing notes for his lecture on +the "Perhapness of the Improbable," and the Doctor-in-Law, having +piled all the cushions in the boat at one end, threw himself upon them +and read the newspaper. + +In this way the afternoon passed very comfortably, and the Rhymester, +after scribbling upon several pieces of paper, came and read to me a +poem which had been inspired by our beautiful surroundings; he called +it + +SOUL YEARNINGS. + + The water's as wet as wet can be, + And the trees, and the grass, are green, + While the little birds sing and the fishes swim; + 'Tis a most delightful scene. + + It makes me yearn for I don't know what, + To come from I don't know where, + And take me away to the thingummybob + And the what-you-may-call-'ems there; + +and he told me that beautiful scenery always affected him in that way. + + [Illustration: AN UNFORTUNATE VOLLEY] + +It was now time for us to be thinking about getting back, especially +as I should have to do all of the rowing. So we got into the boat +again, and I rowed back as far as Twickenham, where we stopped at +Eel-pie Island to have some tea. While we were waiting for it to be +prepared, we began a game of tennis, but were obliged to leave off, as +an unfortunate volley of the Doctor-in-Law's caught the Wallypug on +the nose, and so his Majesty declined to play any more. + +We persuaded him to join us at cricket, though, having found some +stumps and a bat and ball in an outhouse on the Island, and got on +very well for some time till, at a shout of "out, leg before wicket," +the Wallypug (who had caught the ball very nicely on his shin) fell +forward on to the Doctor-in-Law, crushing his hat well over his eyes, +and ruffling his temper considerably. + + [Illustration: "OUT"] + +In fact, I was very glad that tea was announced just then, for I +feared that there was going to be a bother, and, as it was, the +Doctor-in-Law kept scowling at his Majesty very fiercely. + +"I shall make him pay for it," declared the little man, and, during +tea, which we had at wicker tables by the river's edge, he was busy +making out an account, which later he handed with great solemnity to +the Wallypug. His Majesty apparently could not understand it, and +passed it on to me. On examination, I found it to be worded as +follows: + + HIS MAJESTY THE WALLYPUG OF WHY, + In account with + THE DOCTOR-IN-LAW. + + To damage of one hat, L0 7 6 + " Physical injury, 0 2 0 + " Moral deterioration, 15 6 9 + --------- + L22 17 8 + " 3 per cent. discount for cash, 3 6 2 + --------- + L26 4 11 + +"What do you mean by moral deterioration?" demanded the Wallypug. + +"Oh, I don't know. Same as other people do, I suppose," said the +Doctor-in-Law. "It's always charged now, I believe. I read something +about it in the papers this afternoon." + +"But the addition is all wrong," I expostulated. + +"No, it isn't," replied the Doctor-in-Law, rudely snatching the +document from me and putting it into his pocket-book, "and if it +is, it's nothing to do with you. I shall charge it in our expenses, +which the people of Why have undertaken to pay, so there." And the +avaricious little fellow ran off to the boat, which we afterwards +found he had been letting out on hire to small boys at a penny a +head. + +The return journey was accomplished without any remarkable incidents, +and on reaching home I found a very pressing invitation from Girlie's +mother for the whole party to attend her "At Home" the next day. + +It appears that this lady had called upon me while we were out, and +Mrs. Putchy had told her of the Wallypug's arrival. + +His Majesty was good enough to say that he should be delighted to +accept, and so I wrote off at once to say that she might expect us. + + + + +CHAPTER IV + +LOST + + +We had a terrible fright the next morning, for the poor dear Wallypug +got lost, and for some time we could not imagine what had become of +him. + +It happened in this way: directly after breakfast his Majesty said +that he should like to go for a walk and look at the shops. + +"I'm not going," declared the Doctor-in-Law. "I have some _very_ +important letters to write." + +We all looked up in surprise, for we did not know that the +Doctor-in-Law had any other acquaintances in London. + +"Letters from which I hope to derive a princely income," continued +the little man grandly; "and, therefore, I have no time for such +foolishness as looking into shop windows." + +"He's afraid thad he bight have to sped sub buddy," remarked +A. Fish, Esq. + +"Nothing of the sort," replied the Doctor-in-Law, turning very red +though. + +"Well, don't waste time talking about it; let's go if we are going," +said the Rhymester; and so, as I also had some correspondence to +attend to, it was arranged that the Wallypug, the Rhymester, and A. +Fish, Esq., should go for a little stroll by themselves. I had some +doubts in my own mind as to the advisability of letting them go alone, +but they promised not to go beyond Kensington Gardens, and to wait for +me there just inside the gates. + +After they had gone I settled down to my letter-writing, and was +getting along nicely when the Doctor-in-Law interrupted me with: + +"I say, I wish you would let me have about twenty sheets of +note-paper, will you, please?" + +"Twenty!" I exclaimed in surprise. + +"Yes, twenty," said the Doctor-in-Law. "Or you had better make it +a quire while you are about it." + +I thought the quickest way to get rid of him was to give him the +paper, so I got up and got it for him. + +"And a packet of envelopes, please," he said, as I handed it to him. + +"Anything else?" I asked rather sarcastically. + +"Stamps!" he replied, calmly holding out his hand. + +"Well, really--" I expostulated. + +"Oh, halfpenny ones will do. You're surely not so mean as to mind +tenpence, are you?" + +"I don't think I'm mean, but--" + +"Hand them over then, and don't waste so much time talking," said the +little man impatiently, and so, just to get rid of him, I gave him the +stamps and sat down to my letters again. + +I had hardly begun when he came back. + +"Don't you take any other newspapers than these?" he demanded, showing +me a handful. + +"No, I don't, and I think it's rather extravagant of me to have +those," I replied. + +"Well, then, how do you suppose that I am going to manage? I want at +least five other papers, and it's _most_ important that I should have +them." + +"You might buy them," I suggested. + +"They are so dear," he grumbled. + +"Well, why don't you go to the Public Library then?" I suggested. "You +know where it is, and you could see all of the papers there, you +know." + +"Ah, a capital idea," he said, putting on his hat and going out. + +"Now," I thought, "I shall have peace at last." + +I was not left undisturbed long though, for a few minutes later Mrs. +Putchy came to the door. + +"Oh, please, sir, will you go down? Mr. Doctor-in-Law is having such a +bother with the postman." + +I hurried out, and found the little man very angry indeed. + +"This postman won't give me a letter," he cried when he saw me. + +"Perhaps he hasn't one for you," I answered. + +"But I saw him giving them away all down the street for nothing," +persisted the Doctor-in-Law. "And when I asked him in a civil way for +one, he refused to give it to me. It's no use for him to say he hasn't +one, when he has a whole packet in his hand now, and a lot more in +his bag, no doubt. Are you going to give me a letter or not?" he +continued, turning to the postman. + + [Illustration: "ARE YOU GOING TO GIVE ME A LETTER OR NOT?"] + +"No, sir," continued the man, smiling. "I haven't any for you." + +"Very well, then," said the Doctor-in-Law decidedly, "I shall +certainly write to the Queen and tell her that if she employs you any +longer I shall take all my custom away, and I shall not send the +twenty letters, that I intended writing to-day, off at all." + +I endeavoured to explain to the little man that the postman could not +possibly give him a letter if he had not one addressed to him. + +"Oh, that's all nonsense," he exclaimed, going off in a huff. "Of +course you would take his part." + +Before I could settle down to work again the Rhymester and A. Fish, +Esq., returned. + +"Where's the Wallypug?" I demanded. + +"Oh, he's coming by the next 'bus," said the Rhymester. "Haven't you +had any rain here?" + +"No," I replied. + +"Oh, we had quidt a sharb shower," said A. Fish, Esq., "ad I was +afraid of gettig wet, so we stopped a 'bus--there was odly roob for +two though, ad the Wallypug said thad he would cub od by the dext." + +"I hope he will get home all right," I said anxiously. "I don't think +you ought to have left his Majesty by himself." + +"Oh! it's only a little way," said the Rhymester; "he's sure to get +home all right." + + [Illustration: "SO WE STOPPED A 'BUS"] + +An hour passed and there was no signs of the Wallypug. I now began +to get seriously anxious. + +It would, of course, be the easiest thing in the world for his Majesty +to take the wrong 'bus, and be taken goodness knows where. + +I couldn't think what was best to be done. The Rhymester suggested +sending the Crier out, but I never remembered having seen one at +Kensington, and at last, after searching for some time ourselves in +Kensington Gardens, and making inquiries in High Street, and failing +to glean any tidings of his Majesty, I thought it best to go to the +Police Station. + +Here I found a very important-looking official in uniform, with a big +book in front of him. + +"What is it?" he inquired, glaring at me fiercely. + +"I've called to know if you could assist me in finding a friend who, I +fear, has lost his way," I replied. + +The official did not answer me, but reached down another large book. + +"What's his name?" he inquired gruffly. + +"His name? Oh--er--his name is--er--that is to say he is the--" I had +not the least idea what the Wallypug's name really was, so I couldn't +very well say. + +"What's his name?" shouted the official. "I'll ask you what he _is_ +presently." + +"Well, I'm very sorry, but I really do not know his name." + +The man glanced at me very suspiciously. + +"You said he was a friend of yours--it's a very odd thing that you +don't know his name. What is he?" + +"He's a--a--Wallypug," I stammered. "That is to say he--er--" + +"Wallypug!" exclaimed the man contemptuously. "What's that?" + +"Why, it's a kind of king, you know," I explained, feeling that the +explanation was rather a lame one. + +"A _kind_ of king!" exclaimed the police officer. "Explain yourself." + +"Well, I'm afraid I can't explain more clearly than that," I replied. +"This gentleman has been staying with me for a couple of days, and +went out this morning and lost his way." + +"Where did he come from?" asked the man. + +"Why," I answered. + +"Why? Because I want to know," he shouted. "Don't let me have any +further prevarication. Where did the man, or Wallypug, or whatever you +call him, come from?" + +"From Why. From a place called Why, you know," I repeated. + +"I _don't_ know," said the officer. "I've never heard of such a place. +Where is it?" + +"Well, really," I said, "I'm very sorry, but I cannot tell you. I +don't know myself." + +"This is _very_ remarkable," said the man, glaring at me through his +glasses. "You don't know your friend's name; you call him a Wallypug, +and can't explain what that is, you don't know where he comes +from--perhaps you can tell me how he reached your house?" + +I was now really in a fix, for how could I tell this man that his +Majesty had stepped out of a picture. + +I thought the best thing to do was to hold my tongue. + +"How did he come?" repeated the officer. "By train?" + +I shook my head. + +"By steamer?" + +I shook my head again. + +"Did he drive?--or come on a bicycle, or walk?" + +I remained silent. + +The police officer stared at me for a moment or two, waiting for my +answer. + +"Look here, young man," said he at last, evidently very angry indeed. +"It strikes me that you are having a game with me. You had better go +away quietly or I shall be obliged to take you in charge as a +lunatic." + +"But I assure you that--" + +"How was your friend dressed?" + +"Oh, he wore a somewhat battered gold crown, and carried an orb and +sceptre, and was dressed in knee breeches and a velvet cloak with an +ermine collar." + +The man gave me a keen glance and then rang a bell. A policeman +appeared a moment or two afterwards, and the officer whispered +something to him, of which I only caught the words, "harmless +lunatic." + +"Lunatic, sir; yes, sir. Step this way, please," said the policeman, +and before I could realize what had happened I was bundled into a +small bare room, and the key was turned in the lock and I was a +prisoner. + +Here was a pretty state of affairs. The stupid people had mistaken me +for a lunatic, and I was no doubt to be locked up here till a doctor +arrived. + +Of course the only thing for me to do was to sit still and wait as +patiently as I could. Fortunately the police people thought of +telegraphing to the other stations to find out if anything was known +of an escaped lunatic; and from Fulham came the reply, "We have found +one ourselves. He calls himself a Wallypug, and is dressed like a +second-hand king." This caused inquiries to be made, and eventually I +was taken in a cab to Fulham, where we found his Majesty in the charge +of the police, he having been found wandering about the Fulham Road +quite unable to give what they considered a satisfactory account of +himself. + +It was most unfortunate that his Majesty should have taken the wrong +'bus, for, not having any money with him, he was set down in a totally +strange neighbourhood, and had quite forgotten my address. Of course, +now that we had been brought face to face, we had no difficulty in +convincing the police people that we were what we represented +ourselves to be, and were soon, to our great relief, on our way +home again. + +"I don't think that I should like to be a policeman," remarked the +Wallypug, on our way there. + +"No?" I answered. "Why not?" + +"They have to catch dogs for a living?" remarked his Majesty solemnly. +"There were several brought in while I was waiting, and the policeman +who had caught them seemed so pleased about it." + +I explained to the Wallypug as well as I was able about the muzzling +order, and his Majesty was highly indignant, and when I pointed out +several dogs with muzzles on he was more indignant still. + +"And are they always obliged to wear those horrible wire cages over +their heads?" he inquired. + +I told his Majesty that in London the order for wearing them had been +in force for some considerable time, and we had a long talk over the +matter, his Majesty declaring that he should try and invent a new +muzzle which should be more comfortable for the poor dogs. + + [Illustration: UNABLE TO GIVE AN ACCOUNT OF HIMSELF] + +"Oh, here we are at last," he exclaimed, as we turned the corner near +my house. "And there are the others on the steps!" + +"Here they are! Here they are!" shouted the Rhymester to the others, +and everyone rushed forward to assist his Majesty to alight, seemingly +very glad to see us back again. + +We were quite as delighted to get back, I can tell you, and I was so +relieved at having found the Wallypug that I hadn't the heart to +refuse the Doctor-in-Law's request that I would give him ten shillings +worth of penny stamps to put into the letters which he had been +writing while we had been away, although he would not give me the +slightest clue as to what they were wanted for. + + + + +CHAPTER V + +AN 'AT HOME' AND THE ACADEMY + + +We were quite ready for luncheon, as you may imagine, after our +morning's adventures, and directly afterwards his Majesty set to work +on the new dog's muzzle which he had promised to invent. In about half +an hour he had constructed one with which he was intensely delighted, +and he persuaded A. Fish, Esq., to try it on that we might see the +effect. + +It certainly was very simple, but as there was nothing whatever to go +over the mouth, I felt sure that it could not possibly be very useful. +I did not like to tell his Majesty so though, for he seemed so +thoroughly proud of his achievement. + +It was now time to go to the 'At Home,' so, wishing to do honour to +the occasion, our 'State Coach,' as we called it, was sent for, and +we drove off in fine style. + +There were a great many people invited to meet us, and I could see +that there was quite a little flutter of excitement when the Wallypug +entered. + + [Illustration: IT CERTAINLY WAS VERY SIMPLE] + +His Majesty, however, in his simple, good-natured way soon put +everybody at their ease, and laughed and chattered with the utmost +affability. + +Girlie and Boy had both been allowed to come into the drawing-room, +and Girlie quite claimed the Wallypug as her own particular guest, +while Boy renewed his acquaintance with the Rhymester, whom he had met +before at Zum, and despite their mother's protests they carried these +two members of our party off in triumph to show them their play-room +and toys and to talk over old times. + +While they were away the Doctor-in-Law made himself very agreeable to +the ladies, and I watched him bowing and smiling and chatting, first +with one group, then with another, with great amusement. I found out +afterwards that he had promised several of them portraits of his +Majesty and suite for 2s. 6d. each as soon as they should be taken, +and in every case had asked for the money in advance; but the great +event of the afternoon was when A. Fish, Esq., wrapped up in Mrs. +Putchy's pink woollen shawl, borrowed for the occasion, and surrounded +by a group of young ladies, consented after much pressing to deliver +part of his lecture on the "Perhapness of the Improbable." + +"You bust sed for the Rhymebster though to help be to read id, for by +cold is still so bad thad I can'd do id by byself," he explained. + + [Illustration: A. FISH, ESQ., OBLIGES] + +So the Rhymester was sent for, and his Majesty also came down to hear +the wonderful lecture. It had been turned into verse by the Rhymester, +who, after an affected attempt to clear his throat, read as follows: + +THE PERHAPNESS OF THE IMPROBABLE. + + If _this_ were that, and _these_ were those, + And _hither_ nearer thither, + Why, _which_ might be whate'er it chose, + And _there_ be any whither. + + Somehow 'twould be the simpler way + To _dearer_ be than cheaper, + And that's why _when_ (each other day) + Would _higher_ be than _deeper_. + + So _worst_ would be the _best_ of all, + And _far more less_ than either; + While _short_ would certainly be _tall_, + And therefore thus be neither. + + [Illustration: ABSENT-MINDEDLY SPILT HIS TEA] + +"Beautiful! charming!" echoed all the young ladies at once when he +had finished, while one lady sitting near me exclaimed, "How sweetly +simple!" For my own part I thought that it was anything but simple, +and caught myself trying to follow the line of argument with the most +brain-confusing results. + +The Wallypug was greatly distressed when he discovered that while +listening to the reading, and looking at the charming young lady with +whom he had been conversing, he had absent-mindedly spilt the whole of +his cup of tea over her dress. + +"You see, they didn't give me a plate to put my cake on," I heard him +explain apologetically, "and it _was_ so awkward, for my cup would +keep slipping about on the saucer." + +The young lady smiled very sweetly and assured his Majesty that it +didn't matter in the least, and shortly afterwards we left, having +stayed, as it was, far beyond the regulation time. + +When we arrived home we found a letter addressed to the Rhymester in +the letter-box, which in a state of great excitement he tore open with +trembling fingers. + +Upon reading the contents he burst into tears. + +"Poor man, poor man!" he sobbed. "I am so sorry to have caused him so +much trouble." + +"It is a letter from an Editor," he explained through his tears, "and +he is in great distress through not being able to publish my poem. He +says he greatly regrets his inability to make use of it! Poor man, he +evidently feels it very keenly. I must write and tell him not to be +too unhappy about it." + +I had some letters to write too, one to a photographer in Regent +Street, asking for an appointment the next morning, for I was +determined that the Doctor-in-Law should send the promised photographs +to the young ladies without delay. + +The first thing in the morning came a telegram to say that we could +be photographed at eleven o'clock, so, after my guests had made +themselves as spruce as possible, we started off and reached there in +good time. + +It was suggested that the Wallypug should be taken by himself, but +when he saw the camera pointed directly at him while the operator +disappeared beneath the black cloth, he came to the conclusion that it +was too dangerous a machine to be faced with impunity, so he suddenly +turned his back upon it, and nervously fled from the room. + +It was only by promising that the others should be taken with him that +we could get him to sit at all, and even then there was a strained +and nervous expression upon his face, which suggested that he was in +momentary fear that the thing would "go off." + +The Rhymester insisted upon being taken with one of his poems in his +hand, the Doctor-in-Law wore his usual complacent smile, and +altogether the group was quite a success. + +As soon as the "operation," as the Wallypug would insist upon calling +it, was over, we went downstairs, his Majesty leading the way, while +the Doctor-in-Law stayed behind for a moment to make some arrangements +with the photographer about commission. We had intended going home by +'bus, but when we got to the door his Majesty was nowhere to be seen. +What could have become of him? We looked up and down the street, but +could see no signs of him anywhere; and at last, after hunting about +for a considerable time, he was discovered calmly sitting inside a +furniture removal van, waiting for it to start, under the impression +that it was an omnibus. + +"I'm sure this is the right one," he explained, "for it has +'Kensington' printed in large letters on it. Come along, there's +plenty of room inside; the conductor and the driver will be here +presently, I suppose." + +I laughingly explained to his Majesty the mistake which he had made, +and we walked on as far as Piccadilly Circus, where we found a 'bus to +take us to the Academy, which we intended visiting on our way home. We +had not gone far though, when I suddenly remembered that the 22nd June +was very close at hand, and that I had better make arrangements for +seats to view the Jubilee Procession or I should be too late. So it +was arranged that the Doctor-in-Law should take charge of the party +while I went on to the agents to see about the seats. They would have +no difficulty in getting home by themselves for the 'buses ran from +just outside the Academy doors straight to Kensington, so I felt sure +that they would be all right. + +"How much is the entrance fee to the Academy?" asked the +Doctor-in-Law, as I was getting down from the 'bus. + +"A shilling each," I replied, and I saw the little man collecting the +money from the others as the 'bus disappeared from view. + + [Illustration: WAITING FOR IT TO START] + +I was very fortunate at the agents in being able to secure a +capital window in Piccadilly, and some Stores in the neighbourhood +undertook to provide a luncheon and to suitably decorate the window +for us. + +These arrangements being satisfactorily concluded, I hurried home, and +was greatly relieved to find my guests there before me. + +"How did you enjoy the Academy?" I inquired. + + [Illustration: COULD NOT UNDERSTAND THE CATALOGUE] + +"Not at all!" said his Majesty decidedly. + +"Waste of money, I call it," said the Rhymester, sniffing +contemptuously. + +"I was dever so disappointed id edythig id all by life!" declared A. +Fish, Esq. + +"Besides, the catalogue was no good at all," complained his Majesty. +"We could make neither head nor tail of it." + +The Doctor-in-Law was silent, and it was only by very careful inquiry +that I found out that, after pocketing their money, he had taken them +to an immense hoarding covered with advertisement posters, and had +gammoned them into believing that _that_ was the Academy, while it was +no wonder that the poor Wallypug could not understand the 'catalogue,' +for it was nothing more nor less than an old illustrated stores price +list. + +It was really too bad of the Doctor-in-Law. + + + + +CHAPTER VI + +THE JUBILEE + + +The few days which elapsed before the memorable 22nd of June passed +very quickly, and we were all more or less busy making preparations +for the festival. His Majesty would insist upon polishing up his +regalia himself in order to do honour to the occasion, and spent hours +over his crown with a piece of chamois leather and some whitening +till, though somewhat battered by the rough usage it had sustained, it +shone quite brilliantly. Mrs. Putchy herself suggested making his +Majesty some new red silk rosettes for his shoes, which he very +graciously consented to accept. The Doctor-in-Law was always so spick +and span that we scarcely noticed any change in his appearance, but +the Rhymester had made arrangements with General Mary Jane to wash, +starch, and iron his lace collar, and he remained in his room one +entire day while it was being done up. A. Fish, Esq., purchased a +necktie of most brilliant colouring, and One-and-Nine touched himself +up here and there with some red enamel where his tunic had become +shabby in places, so that altogether our party looked very smart as we +drove at a very early hour to our seats in Piccadilly. To avoid the +crowd we went by way of Bayswater Road, and then passed down Park Lane +and through Berkeley Square, in order to reach the back entrance to +the house in Piccadilly where I had booked seats. Our gorgeous +carriage was everywhere hailed with great delight, being of course +mistaken for a portion of the Jubilee procession, and many were the +conjectures heard on all sides as to who the Wallypug could possibly +be. + + [Illustration: WITH SOME RED ENAMEL] + +Our window was in the centre of the building on the first floor, and +we had it all to ourselves. A table at the back of the room was +tastefully set out with an excellent cold collation, and in front of +the window, which was most elaborately decorated with velvet curtains, +flags, and trophies, and which was surmounted by a device which was +understood to be the Wallypug's coat-of-arms, a gorgeous, gilded, +high-backed chair was placed as a throne for his Majesty, and +comfortable seats were also provided for the rest of the party. + +The crowd outside greeted our appearance with quite a demonstration, +as by the enormous placard outside announcing the name of the +decorators, and stating that they were by appointment to his Majesty +the Wallypug of Why, of course everybody knew who we were. Indeed, one +learned-looking person in the crowd was holding forth to an eager +audience, and explaining exactly where Why was situated, and +pretending that he had been there, and had seen the Wallypug before, +ever so many times. + +As the time approached for the procession to pass, the Wallypug became +very excited and nervous. "Shall I really see the Queen of England?" +he kept asking over and over again. "Do you think she will see me? +Will she bow to me? What must I say? Must I keep my crown on or take +it off?" and innumerable other questions of the same nature. + +Presently the excitement and enthusiasm reached their height, as amid +a confused shouting of "Here they are," the Guards in advance came in +sight. Slowly the mighty procession, with its innumerable squadrons +and bands passed, and at last, after the English and Foreign princes +and Eastern potentates, the eight cream-coloured Hanoverian horses, +drawing the Jubilee landau, made their appearance, and the Queen was +seen, smiling and bowing graciously to the cheering populace. The +Doctor-in-Law, in his excitement, scrambled on to the window ledge in +order to obtain a better view; the Wallypug loyally waved his crown; +while the Rhymester, hurriedly unrolling a lengthy ode which he had +written especially for the occasion, began reading it in a loud voice, +and, though nobody paid the slightest attention to him, did not desist +until long after the procession had passed. + + [Illustration: THE WALLYPUG LOYALLY WAVED HIS CROWN] + +The Wallypug was very thoughtful for some time after the Queen had +gone by, and, during the drive home, expressed his great surprise +that her Majesty had not worn a crown, and apparently could not +understand why it should not be worn on all occasions. + +"I suppose her Majesty has a crown of her own, hasn't she?" he asked +anxiously. + +"Oh yes, of course!" I replied. + +"Where is it then?" persisted his Majesty. + +"I believe all of the regalia is kept carefully locked up and guarded +in the Tower of London," I said. + +"Well, I think it's very unkind of them not to let her Majesty have +them out on an occasion like this. I shall see what I can do about +it." + +The dear Wallypug's intentions were evidently so good that I did not +say anything in reply to this, though I wondered to myself whatever +his Majesty thought that _he_ could do in the matter. + +There were so many people about that we considered it best to spend +the rest of the day quietly at home, though we did venture out in the +evening to see the illuminations, which delighted his Majesty +exceedingly. + +The next afternoon the whole party, with the exception of +One-and-Nine, drove over the route taken by the procession, in order +to see the street decorations. I remained at home, and late in the +afternoon there was a knock at my door, and General Mary Jane entered. +She was nervously wringing a handkerchief wet with tears, and her eyes +were quite red with weeping. + +"Please, sir," she began, sniffing pathetically, "I want to +gi--gi--give no--notice." + +"Why! what ever for?" I asked in surprise, for General Mary Jane was +an excellent servant, and Mrs. Putchy had always been very pleased +with her. + +"Please, sir, it's Sergeant One-and-Nine; he's broken my 'art, sir, +and I can't bear it no longer," and the poor girl burst into a flood +of tears. + +"Bless me!" I cried, "whatever do you mean?" + +"Well, sir, you see ever since he's been 'ere, sir, he's been a making +hup to me; leastwise that's what I thought he meant, sir; but this +afternoon bein' my day hout, I went up to Kensington Gardens for a +walk (him a saying as he would be there), and what should I see when +I gets there, but him a walkin' about with half-a-dozen of them +nursemaids in white frocks a followin' of him. Not that I says as it's +altogether his fault; they will run after the military; but it's more +than I can stand, sir, me bein' that proud at 'avin' a soldier for a +sweetheart, and all," and she began to cry again. + + [Illustration: THEY WILL RUN AFTER THE MILITARY] + +I hardly knew what to do, but suggested that she should not think too +seriously about it, and General Mary Jane, saying she hoped I would +excuse her troubling me in the matter, decided to go to her married +sister at Barnes and spend the rest of her day out there, and talk +the matter over with her. I had a lot of writing to do all the +afternoon, and the time passed so quickly that until the gong sounded +for dinner I did not realize that the Wallypug and his party had not +returned. It was now past seven, and they should have been home hours +since. + +I was so anxious about them that I could scarcely eat any dinner, and +as soon as the meal was over I hurried to the livery stables to hear +if they knew anything about the matter. + +The first person I encountered when I arrived there was the coachman, +now divested of his fine livery, and busy in the yard. + +"Bless you, sir, yes, back hours ago," said he. "I set his Majesty and +the others down at your door about five o'clock, and I did hear them +say something about going down to Hammersmith for a walk." + +"To Hammersmith?" I echoed in surprise. + +"Yes, sir--they wanted to see the Suspension Bridge and the river +again, so I told them the way to get there. They're all right, sir, +I'll be bound. The Doctor-in-Law is too wide awake for anything to +happen to them while he is with them." + +I walked home somewhat easier in my mind now that I knew the party had +returned safely, though still somewhat anxious as to their +whereabouts. + +About nine o'clock it began to get quite dark, and I was just setting +out to see if I could find any trace of them when General Mary Jane +returned. + + [Illustration: "AND DONKEY RIDES"] + +"Oh, sir!" she exclaimed directly she saw me, "what do you think? His +Majesty and the Doctor-in-Law and the others are down at the fair by +Hammersmith Bridge, and they are 'aving such a lark. I see them all +'aving a roundabout as I was coming past on my way 'ome from my +sister's just now; such a crowd there was a cheering and a hollering. +Cocoa-nut shies, too, a boy told me they had been 'aving, and old Aunt +Sally, and donkey rides along the towing path." + + [Illustration: "THEY ARE 'AVING SUCH A LARK"] + +I hurriedly put on my hat and rushed off to Hammersmith, for I didn't +know what might happen to my guests among the rough crowd which I knew +usually gathered there. + +When I arrived on the scene I found the whole party on the roundabout, +and when they alighted I learned that the Doctor-in-Law had arranged +with one of the show people to share the proceeds of exhibiting the +Wallypug and A. Fish, Esq., in separate tents, at 3d. a head. + +I met with considerable opposition from the show people in my +endeavours to persuade my guests to come home, as they had evidently +been a source of considerable profit to them, though the man with the +cocoa-nut shies declared that the Doctor-in-Law had claimed a great +many more nuts than he was properly entitled to. + +The crowd made quite a demonstration when we departed in a +four-wheeler, and the Rhymester evidently considered it a compliment +that the contents of so many "ladies' tormentors," as the little tubes +filled with water are called, were directed at him. Altogether the +whole party had evidently been delighted with their evening's +amusement, though, as I explained to them while we were driving home, +it was highly inconsistent with the dignity of his Majesty's position, +and calculated to cause him to be treated with a certain amount of +disrespect. I could see, however, that all I said had very little +effect on any of the party, and that they were one and all highly +delighted with their adventure. + + + + +CHAPTER VII + +MORE ADVENTURES + + +"It's the most contraryish place I've ever seen," declared +One-and-Nine. + +"Yes," agreed the Wallypug. "There was no water in the moat." + +"The Drawbridge didn't draw," echoed the Rhymester. + +"Ad the beefeaters didn't eat beef," chimed in A. Fish, Esq., while +the Doctor-in-Law declared that for his part he "considered the +morning spent there had been entirely wasted." + +They were talking about the Tower of London, and were telling Girlie +and Boy, who were spending the afternoon with us, all about their +visit there on the previous day. + +I was sitting in an adjoining room--but the door being open I could +hear all that was said. + +"How did you go?" asked Boy. + +"Oh!" exclaimed the Wallypug, "in the most extraordinary way you can +possibly imagine. We went into a house in High Street, Kensington, and +bought some little tickets, and then we handed them to a man at a +barrier, who cut a little piece out of each one as we passed through." + +"To rebebber us by," chimed in A. Fish, Esq. + +"Yes," continued the Wallypug; "and then we went down two flights of +stairs, and by-and-bye a lot of little houses on wheels came rushing +into the station, and we got into one of them and before you could say +'Jack Robinson' we were rushing through a big black tunnel under the +ground." + +"Why, you mean the Underground Railway," declared Girlie. + +"Yes," agreed his Majesty. "And the little room we sat in had +beautiful soft cushions and a big light in the middle of the roof, and +little texts printed on the wall--" + +"Texts!" exclaimed both of the children. + +"Texts," repeated the Wallypug. "What were they? Do you remember?" he +asked of the others. + +"Oh, one was, 'You are requested not to put your feet on the +cushions,'" said the Rhymester. + +"Oh, yes, and 'To seat five,' and 'Wait till the train stops'--I +remember now," continued the Wallypug. "Well, we kept rushing through +the tunnel till we came to 'Holman's Mustard,' and a lot of people got +out, and then we went on again till we came to 'Smears' Soap.'" + + [Illustration: "HOLMAN'S MUSTARD AGAIN"] + +"It wasn't 'Smears' Soap,'" contradicted the Doctor-in-Law. "It was +somebody's Ink." + +"Well, there were such a lot of names," declared the Wallypug, "it was +impossible to really tell which was which. I always took the name +opposite to my window to be the right one. The funniest part of it all +was, we kept coming to 'Holman's Mustard' over and over again. I can't +think how on earth the people know when to get out." + +"Why, those weren't the names of the stations at all," laughed Boy. +"They were advertisements!" + +"Well, where were the names of the stations then?" demanded his +Majesty. + +"Why, in big letters on the walls of course," was the reply. + +"They couldn't have been much bigger than those of 'Holman's +Mustard,'" persisted the Wallypug somewhat ungrammatically. + +"Never mind about that; get on with your story," remarked the +Doctor-in-Law impatiently. + +"Well, after going through a lot of tunnels and stopping ever so many +times, we got out at one of the stations and went upstairs into the +light again, and almost opposite the station we could see a lot of +grey stone buildings with towers and battlements." + +"I know! You mean the Tower. We've been there," interrupted Girlie. + +"Did you see the Lions?" asked the Wallypug eagerly. + +"Lions! No!" exclaimed the children. "There weren't any; you didn't +see any, did you?" + +"No, we didn't," admitted the Wallypug, "but the Doctor-in-Law told us +that there were some there." + +"I read it in a book," declared the Doctor-in-Law. "But I daresay it +was all a pack of stories, like the rest of the things they said. Look +at the Crown Jewels for instance--bits of glass and rubbish. That's +why they put them in an iron cage, so you can't get at them to see if +they are real." + +"Oh! I think they _are_ real," said Boy. "The Guide told us that they +were worth ever so many thousands of pounds." + +"Yes, he may have _said_ so," remarked the Doctor-in-Law, "but I'll be +bound he wouldn't let you take them away and examine them for +yourself. I asked them to let me have one or two of the crowns and +things to take home and test, but they positively refused, although I +promised to return them within a week. They are afraid that we should +find out that they are only imitations--that's what's the matter." + +"There weren't any kings or queens executed either the day we were +there," he continued, grumbling. + +"Well, I'm sure I'm very glad that _that_ fashion has died out," +declared his Majesty. "I don't mind admitting now that I was rather +nervous about going at all, for fear that I should have _my_ head +chopped off, and I should feel so very awkward without one, you know." + +"Pooh! You needn't have been alarmed, for there wasn't a Lord High +Executioner on the premises, because I asked," declared the Rhymester. + +"No, but do you know," said his Majesty, "I've found out since, that +he lives at the bottom of our street, and mends shoes for a living--he +does a little executing still on the sly, for I have seen his bill in +the window, 'Orders _executed_ with promptness and dispatch.' I asked +him one day what class he executed most, and he said that his +connection was principally amongst the 'Uppers.' He seems a very kind +man though, and not only executes orders, but heals them too, poor +souls! He charges 1s. 3d. for healing. His education has been sorely +neglected, I am afraid, however, for he spells it 'heeling.'" + +"Did you see the Armoury at the Tower?" asked Boy. + +"Yes, and there was another instance of deception," declared the +Doctor-in-Law. + +"What do you mean?" asked Boy. + +"Well, what is an armoury?" inquired the Doctor-in-Law. + +"A place where arms are kept, I suppose," replied Boy. + +"Just so, and there wasn't an arm in the place except our own," said +the Doctor-in-Law wrathfully. + +"Why, they call guns and things arms," said Boy, laughing. + +"Oh! do they?" remarked the Doctor-in-Law sarcastically. "Why don't +they call things by their proper names then? they might as well call +them legs, or turnips, or paraffin oil--bah! I've no patience with +such folly!" + + [Illustration: "THEY WENT FOR BY CALVES"] + +"I think they bight feed the raveds[1] bedder," complained A. Fish, +Esq. "They went for by calves, and if wud of those Beefeaters +hadn'd cub and driven theb away I shouldn't have had a leg left to +stand up od." + + [1] He meant the tame ravens which are kept at the Tower. + +"Beefeaters, yes!" remarked the Rhymester, "and a pretty lot they +were. I tried several of them with a piece that I had brought with me +in a little paper bag, and not one of them would touch it." + +"Madame Tussaud's was better; we went there in the afternoon," said +his Majesty. + +"Yes, but who was to know which were wax figures and which were not?" +asked the Doctor-in-Law. + +"Well, you made a pretty muddle of it anyhow," said the Wallypug. "Do +you know," he went on, "the Doctor-in-Law made us all pay sixpence +each towards the catalogue, and then went around with us explaining +the various groups. He had just finished telling us that several +ladies, who were standing together, were Henry the Eighth's wives, +when they all marched off looking highly indignant." + +"Well, how was I to know?" remarked the Doctor-in-Law pettishly. "I'd +never met a single one of Henry the Eighth's wives in my life, and how +was I to recognize them?" + +"I don't think they would have binded so butch if the Rhymebster +hadn't pinched wud of theb to see if they were alive or dot," remarked +A. Fish, Esq. + +"Did you see the Sleeping Beauty?" asked Girlie. + + [Illustration: HE COULD GET NO ANSWER] + +"Oh, yes! Isn't it cruel to keep her shut up in that case," cried the +Wallypug. "I'm sure she's alive, for we could see her breathing quite +distinctly. I was so concerned about it that I asked the Doctor-in-Law +to speak to a policeman who was standing near by about it. But he +could get no answer from him, and we found out afterwards that he was +only a wax figure." + +"The best thig of all," remarked A. Fish, Esq., "was whed we all +pretended that we--" + +"Dear me, it's very warm!" interrupted the Doctor-in-Law. "Let's +change the subject." + +"Pretended that we--" continued A. Fish, Esq. + +"Hush--sh--sh--!" cried the Doctor-in-Law in a warning voice. + +"The fact of the matter is," explained the Rhymester, "the +Doctor-in-Law got us all to pretend that we were wax figures +ourselves, and he tied little money boxes in front of us with the +words: 'Put a penny in the slot and the figure will move,' written on +them, and when anyone put a penny in we all moved our heads and rolled +our eyes about." + +"I didn't!" said the Wallypug. + +"No, I know you didn't," replied the Rhymester. "And the Doctor-in-Law +had to explain that you were out of order, and that's how we were +found out, for the people wanted their money back and he wouldn't give +it to them, so they called the attendant, and we had to go out as +quickly as we could." + +"Ad wasn't id beade?" said A. Fish, Esq. "There were four shillings +ad threepedce id the boxes, ad the Doctor-id-Law wouldn't give us a +penny of id." + +"Well, I let you pay my fare home. That amounted to the same thing," +replied the little man. + +Just then Mrs. Putchy came in with afternoon tea, and I joined my +guests in the drawing-room. + + + + +CHAPTER VIII + +HIS MAJESTY IS INTERVIEWED + + +The next morning we were all seated around the breakfast table +laughing over our adventures of the evening before, when we had +visited the Earl's Court Exhibition together. We had been up in the +Great Wheel, and having passed through the pretty old English village +were walking around the artificial lake listening to the band playing +in their little pavilion on the island in the middle, when the +Doctor-in-Law declared that he heard a strange trumpeting sound, and +asked me what it could be. I had not heard it and so could not tell +him, and we were just discussing the matter when the Wallypug clutched +wildly at his crown, and turning around we saw a huge elephant lifting +it gracefully off his head with its trunk. + +Directly his Majesty realized what it was, he gave a wild scream and +took to his heels, as did all the others, with the exception of the +Rhymester, who tripped against a stone and lay with his head buried in +his arms for some time, kicking and screaming for help. + +Of course it was only the tame elephant that carries the children on +its back, but to the unaccustomed eyes of the Wallypug and his party +it seemed, so they told me afterwards, some strange and awful monster +ready to devour them. + +As I said, we were laughing merrily over this adventure when the +postman arrived, and the Doctor-in-Law, without asking to be excused +from the table, rushed out to meet him, and returned a few minutes +later with his arms loaded with a number of little packages and one +rather large box, which had arrived by Carter Paterson. + +"Dear me, what a lot of letters," remarked his Majesty. + +"Yes. Wouldn't you like to know what they are all about, eh?" inquired +the Doctor-in-Law. + +"Yes, I should," admitted the Wallypug; while the faces of the +others all expressed the same curiosity. + + [Illustration: A STRANGE AND AWFUL MONSTER] + +"Well, I'll tell you what I'll do," said the Doctor-in-Law. "If you'll +all pay me fourpence halfpenny each, I will let you open them and see +for yourselves." + +There was a little grumbling at this, but eventually the money changed +hands, and, the breakfast things having been removed, the little +packages were opened with great eagerness. + +Besides a printed circular, each one contained some little article--a +pencil case, a pen knife, a comb, a sample tin of knife polish, a card +of revolving collar studs, and so on. + +"Ah!" remarked the Doctor-in-Law complacently as these articles +were spread about the table; "I told you that I expected to derive a +princely revenue from my correspondence, and now I will explain to you +how it is done. I observed a great number of advertisements in the +daily papers, stating that 'A handsome income could be earned without +the slightest trouble or inconvenience, and particulars would be +forwarded to any one sending six stamps and an addressed envelope'; +so I sent off about twenty, and here is the result. I see by these +circulars that I have only to sell two hundred of these little pencil +cases at half-a-crown each in order to earn 1s. 6d. commission, and +for every dozen tins of knife polish I sell, I shall be paid 1-1/2d., +besides being able to earn 6d. a thousand by addressing envelopes for +one firm, if I supply my own envelopes." + +"What's in the big box?" inquired the Rhymester. + +"A dittig bachede," replied A. Fish, Esq., who had been busily engaged +in opening it. + +"A what?" exclaimed the others. + +"A dittig bachede for dittig socks," repeated A. Fish, Esq. + +"Oh yes, of course!" explained the Doctor-in-Law, "a knitting machine. +I was persuaded to buy it on the understanding that I was to have +constant work all the year round, and be paid so much per pair for +knitting socks with it. It's a most interesting and amusing +occupation, and, I'll tell you what, I don't mind letting any one of +you use the machine for sixpence an hour, if you find your own worsted +and give me the socks when they are finished. There now! nothing +could be fairer than that, could it?" + + [Illustration: THE "DITTIG BACHEDE"] + +And positively A. Fish, Esq., was so infatuated with the charms of the +"dittig bachede," as he called it, that he actually agreed to these +terms, and sent out for some worsted, and commenced "dittig" with +great enthusiasm. The Doctor-in-Law then set the Rhymester to work, +addressing the envelopes on the understanding that he was to share +the sixpence per thousand to be paid for them. And, having bothered +the Wallypug and myself into buying a pencil-case and a knife each, in +order to get rid of him, he started off to the kitchen to see if he +could do any business with Mrs. Putchy in the knife-polish or +black-lead line. + +His Majesty and myself were just saying what an extraordinary little +man he was, when he burst in upon us again. + +"Heard the news?" he inquired, his face beaming with importance. + +"No. What is it?" inquired the others eagerly. + +"Ah! wouldn't you like to know?" exclaimed the Doctor-in-Law. "How +much will you give me for telling you?" + +"How much do you want?" asked the Rhymester dubiously. + +"A penny each," was the reply. + +"Come on then, let's have it," said the Rhymester, collecting the +pennies from the others and handing them to the Doctor-in-Law. + +"Why--er--er--Queen Anne is dead, and the Dutch have taken +Holland--yah!" And the little man burst out laughing. + +"Oh! I say, that's _too_ bad," grumbled the Wallypug. "Isn't it now?" +he cried, appealing to me. + +"Well, really," I replied, "you shouldn't be so silly as to give him +money. You ought to know by this time what to expect from him." + +"No, but truly," said the Doctor-in-Law, pulling a serious face, "I +_have_ got some news, the other was only my fun. A lady is going to +call on us at eleven, to interview the Wallypug. I had almost +forgotten it." + +"A lady!" I exclaimed. "Whoever do you mean?" + +"Oh, she's the Duchess of something. I forget her name," answered the +Doctor-in-Law nonchalantly. "She called the other day while you were +out, and explained that she was a contributor to one of the latest +society magazines, and was anxious to send an illustrated interview +with the Wallypug, to her paper; so--a-hem!--after we had come to +terms, I arranged for her to come to-day and see him. You had better +go and make yourself tidy, hadn't you?" he continued, turning to the +Wallypug. + +"Well, really," I interposed, "I think you might have consulted his +Majesty first, before making these arrangements." + +"Oh! do you?" said the Doctor-in-Law rudely. "Well, I don't see that +it's any business of yours, my good sir--so there!" and he bounced out +of the room again, rattling his sample tins. + +It was nearly eleven then, and a few minutes afterwards a +beautifully-appointed carriage drew up to the door, and Mrs. Putchy +brought up a card inscribed: + + [Illustration: _Her Grace the Duchess of Mortlake._] + +and immediately ushered in a fashionably-dressed lady, who smilingly +offered me the tips of her fingers. + +"Oh, _how_ do you do? You are the gentleman, I think, who is to +introduce me to his Majesty, are you not?" + +"Well, really, your Grace, we have only just heard of the appointment, +but his Majesty the Wallypug will be very pleased to receive you I am +sure." + +"And is that his Majesty at the other end of the room?" whispered the +Duchess. "Pray present me." + +I made the necessary introduction, and the Duchess gave the regulation +Court 'dip,' which the Wallypug gravely imitated, and then in his +usual simple manner offered his hand with a smile. + + [Illustration: IN THE MOST APPROVED FASHION] + +Her Grace made a deep presentation curtsey and bowed over it in the +most approved fashion; but the Wallypug, evidently unused to being +treated with so much ceremony, withdrew it hastily and remarked +nervously but politely: + +"Won't you take a seat, madam?" + +"Say, 'Your Grace,'" I whispered. + +"What for?" asked his Majesty blankly. + +"Because this lady is a Duchess, and you must always say 'Your Grace' +when speaking to her," I replied. + +"Oh!" said the Wallypug vaguely--then going up to the Duchess he +solemnly said, "I'm Grace." + +"No, no!" I explained. "You don't understand me. I mean, when you +speak to this lady you must call her 'Your Grace.'" + +"Dear me, how stupid of me, to be sure!" said his Majesty. "I +understand now. I beg your pardon. I meant to say, 'You are my Grace,' +madam," he continued, addressing himself to the Duchess. + +Her Grace amiably laughed away this little mistake, and was soon busy +asking questions. The Wallypug, however, got very nervous, and made a +shocking lot of mistakes in his answers. He couldn't even say how old +he was. + +"I know I've been in the family for years," he remarked, "and I fancy +I must have come over with William the Conqueror. Such a lot of people +did that, you know, and it's so respectable. I don't remember it, of +course; but then I've been told that I was born very young, and so +naturally I shouldn't do so." + +"Does your Majesty remember any of the incidents of your early life?" +asked the Duchess. + +"I was considered remarkably bald for my age as an infant," replied +the Wallypug simply. "And I believe I had several measles, and a mump +or two as a child. But I don't wish to boast about them," he added +modestly. + +"Where were you educated, your Majesty?" was the next question. + +"I wasn't," replied the Wallypug with a sigh. + +"Does your Majesty mean that you received no education at all?" asked +the Duchess in surprise. + +"Oh! I was taught reading, and writing, and arithmetic, and the use of +the globes, and Latin and Greek, and all that rubbish, of course," +replied the Wallypug. "But I mean there were no Universities at Why, +where I could receive a higher education, and be taught cricket, and +football, and rowing, and all those classical things taught at Oxford +and Cambridge, you know. I was considered the best boy in my form at +marbles though," he added proudly. "And I could beat any of the +masters at Hop Scotch." + +"What is your favourite diet, your Majesty?" came next. + +"Oh! jumbles, I think--or bull's eyes. I'm very fond of hardbake too, +and I love cocoa-nut ice." + +A few more questions such as these, and her Grace took her departure, +after taking several snap-shot photographs of various articles in the +drawing room. + +I felt convinced that with such a scanty amount of information at her +disposal the Duchess would have great difficulty in writing an article +on the Wallypug, and was therefore the more surprised a few days later +to receive a copy of the magazine which her Grace represented, with a +long and particular account of the interview, under the heading of, +"'Why Wallypug and wherefore of Why?' by a Lady of Title." Into it her +Grace had introduced the most preposterous and extravagant statements +about his Majesty. + +We learned with amazement that "The Wallypug came of a very ancient +family, and had early been distinguished for many remarkable +accomplishments. While at school his Majesty displayed such a natural +aptitude for learning as to readily out-distance his instructors." + +"I suppose that's because I said I played Hop Scotch better than the +masters," commented his Majesty, to whom I was reading the account +aloud. + + [Illustration: THE FAITHFUL HOUND] + +Photographs of various articles in the drawing-room, which had no +connection whatever with the Wallypug, were reproduced with the most +extraordinary and absolutely untrue stories attached to them. Dick and +Mrs. Mehetable Murchison appeared as "The Wallypug's favourite cat and +dog," while pathetic stories were told of how the dog had on several +occasions saved his royal master from an untimely and watery grave, +while the cat had prevented him from being burned to death while +reading in bed by gently scratching his nose when he had fallen +asleep, and the candle had set fire to the bed curtains. Sensational +illustrations were also given depicting these incidents, which of +course were purely imaginary. + +It was very remarkable to notice though, that directly the article of +the Duchess's appeared, invitations from all sorts of grand people +poured in upon us--and the daily papers suddenly woke up to the fact +that the Wallypug and his suite were very important personages, and +devoted whole columns to "Our Mysterious Foreign Guests," as they +called them. + + [Illustration: THE SAGACIOUS PUSSY] + +There was always more or less of a crowd outside the house now, and +when his Majesty drove in the Park, the people all stood up on the +little green seats to get a better view of him as he passed. + + + + +CHAPTER IX + +THE WALLYPUG'S OWN + + +It was shortly after this that the Doctor-in-Law, hearing what a vast +fortune might be made in literature, decided to start a magazine of +his own. + + [Illustration: THE DOCTOR-IN-LAW WAS EDITOR] + +After a lot of argument it was thought best to call it _The Wallypug's +Own_, as the name was considered a striking one. The first number was +to be a very elaborate affair, and, for weeks before it appeared, all +of my guests were busily engaged in its production. + +"There will be a good opportunity for some of your poems appearing at +last," hinted the Doctor-in-Law to the Rhymester, which so delighted +the poor little fellow that he set to work at once upon a number of +new ones. A. Fish, Esq., contributed a very learned article on the +subject of "The Prevalence of Toothache amongst Fish: its Cause and +Treatment"; while the great attraction of the number was an historical +article by the Wallypug on the subject of "Julius Caesar," illustrated +by his Majesty himself. As a special favour, the original drawing was +presented to me by his Majesty, and I am thus enabled to reproduce it +for your benefit. His Majesty confided to me that parts of it were +traced from a picture which appeared in the _Boys' Own Paper_ some +time ago, but of course we did not tell everybody that. + + [Illustration: FROM "THE WALLYPUG'S OWN"] + +The essay itself was quite original, and was worded somehow like this: + + "_Julius Caesar was a man, and he lived in Rome. He came over to + conquer Britain because he heard there was a lot of tin here, and + when he arrived he said in Latin_, 'Veni, vidi, vici,' _which + means, 'I have come, and thou wilt have to skedaddle', which has + been the British motto ever since. But the Ancient Britons who + lived here then, didn't understand Latin, and so they went for + Julius Caesar, and shook their fists in his face, and tried to + drive him and his followers away. But Julius Caesar and the Romans + were civilized, and had daggers and things, and shields, and wore + firemen's helmets, and kilts like Scotchmen, so they soon overcame + the Ancient Britons; and they built London Wall, and made a lot of + combs, and glass tear-bottles, and brooches, and sarcophaguses, + that you can see in the Museum at the Guildhall; and then they went + back to Rome, and Julius Caesar was stabbed by his friend Brutus, + to show how much he liked him; and Caesar, when he found out he was + stabbed, cried out in Latin_, 'Et tu, Brute,' _which means 'Oh, you + brute,' and lived happy ever after. I have drawn the picture of + Julius Caesar landing in Britain--that's him waving things, and + calling to the others to come on._" + +The Doctor-in-Law was editor, and arranged a number of competitions, +and in order to enter for them you had only to send two shillings in +stamps, while the prizes were advertised as follows: First prize, +L1000 a year for life; second prize, thirty-six grand pianos and +fourteen bicycles; third prize, a sewing machine and six cakes of +scented soap. The prizes were to be awarded for the first correct +answers received by post, but the Doctor-in-Law took good care to +write three sets of answers himself, and put them in our letter-box a +half-an-hour before the first post arrived, so that nobody got prizes +but himself. He made a good deal of money, too, by pretending to tell +your fortune by the creases in your collar. All you had to do was to +send an old collar and fourteen penny stamps, and you would receive a +letter in reply similar to this: + +"You are probably either a male or a female, and will no doubt live +till you die. You like to have your own way when you can get it, and +when you can't you get very cross and irritable. You are not so young +as you were a few years ago, and you dislike pain of any kind. You +will remain single until you marry, and whichever you do you will +probably wish you hadn't." + +The greatest novelty, however, which the Doctor-in-Law introduced in +his new magazine was his system of telling your character by your +watch and chain. There was no fee charged, and all you had to do was +to send your watch and chain (gold preferred), and the Doctor-in-Law +would tell your character, quite correctly. It generally was as +follows: + +"You are a silly donkey, for no one but a donkey would think of +sending his watch and chain to a stranger, and if you imagine that you +will ever see it again, you are greatly mistaken." + +The Rhymester only had one poem in after all, as, when it came to the +point, the Doctor-in-Law charged him a guinea a verse for printing it, +and the poor Rhymester could not afford more than one poem at that +rate. + +This is what he sent: + + [Illustration] + +THE NEW ROBIN. + + The North wind doth blow, + And we ought to have snow, + If 'tis true what my nurse used to sing, + Poor thing. + + Yet up in yon tree + Robin Redbreast I see + As happy and gay as a king, + Poor thing. + + Look! as true as I live, + There's a boy with a sieve + And a stick and a long piece of string, + Poor thing. + + But the bird doesn't care, + For I hear him declare, + "Pooh! the old dodge he tried in the Spring, + Poor thing." + + "What ridiculous cheek," + And he turns up his beak + Ere he tucks his head under his wing, + Poor thing. + + [Illustration] + +The poor Rhymester was very disappointed at not being able to publish +more of his poems, so the Doctor-in-Law, to console him, allowed him +to contribute an article on "Fashions for the Month by Our Paris +Model." He made a frightful muddle of it though, not knowing the +proper terms in which to describe the various materials and styles. +Here is an extract, which will show you better than I can tell, the +stupid blunders which he made: + + "_Hats this season are principally worn on the head, and may be + trimmed with light gauzy stuff wobbled round the crown mixed up + with various coloured ribbons, and bunches of artificial flowers + and fruit._ + + "_Artificial vegetables are not much worn, although a cauliflower + or two and a bunch of carrots, with a few cabbages, would form a + striking and novel decoration for a hat. If this trimming is + considered insufficient, a few brightly coloured tomatoes stuck + round the brim might be added, and would render the head-gear + particularly 'chic.'_ + + "_Hats for the theatre should be worn large and handsomely trimmed, + but for the economically inclined--a last year's clothes basket + trimmed with art muslin, which may be purchased of any good draper + at 1-3/4d. a yard, cut on the cross and tucked with chiffons, would + form a sweetly simple hat, and if tied beneath the chin with an + aigrette, and the front filled in with sequins, it would readily be + mistaken for one of the new early Victorian bonnets which continue + to be worn by the upper housemaids in most aristocratic families._ + + _"I hear that dresses are to be worn again this year by ladies. The + most fashionable ones will be made of various sorts of material._ + + _"A charming walking costume suitable for the Autumn may be made of + shaded grenadine, trimmed with buckram pom-poms, made up on the + selvedge edge."_ + +There was a lot more nonsense of this kind which I did not at all +understand, but which some lady friends who understood these things +made great fun of. + +You will be surprised, no doubt, to hear that in a weak moment I +allowed myself to be persuaded into contributing a little experience +of my own. + +The Rhymester told me that it was shockingly bad rhyme, but I think +that he was jealous because the Doctor-in-Law published it. Anyhow, +here it is, so you can judge for yourself. I call it + +HE AND I AND IT. + + Oh HE was a Publisher + And I was a Publishee, + And IT was a book + Which the Publisher took + And pub-l-i-s-h-e-d. + + The Publisher's smile it was bland, + 'Twas a beautiful smile to see, + As again and again + He took pains to explain + How large my "half-profits" _might_ be. + + IT had a capital sale, + Well reviewed by the _Times_ and _D.T._, + And a great many more, + So my friends by the score + Came around to congratulate me. + + [Illustration: IT HAD A CAPITAL SALE] + + And people I scarcely had met, + Just "dropped in" to afternoon tea; + While my aunt, who's a swell, + _Now_ remembered quite well + That I was related to she. + + And girls that were rich and plain, + Or pretty and poor, did agree + To let me suppose + That I'd but to propose + To be m-a-r-r-i-e-d. + + [Illustration: MY FRIENDS ALL TURNED TAIL] + + Yes, HE published IT in the Spring, + That season of frolic and glee; + "In the Autumn," HE said, + Gravely nodding his head, + "'Half-profits' will mean L.S.D." + + But Autumn has come and gone, + And I'm so to say, "All at sea," + For HE sobs and HE sighs + And HE turns up his eyes + When I ask what my "half-profits" be. + + There are "charges for this, and for that," + And for "things that HE couldn't foresee," + And HE "very much fears," + So he says twixt his tears, + "That there won't be a penny for me." + + Oh! rich is the Publisher + And poor is the Publishee; + Of the profits of IT + I shall touch not a bit, + They are all swallowed up by HE. + + The girls now all treat me with scorn-- + Aunt turns up her n-o-s-e, + And my friends all turn tail, + While my book they assail + And call rubbish and twad-d-l-e. + +Even One-and-Nine and General Mary Jane were smitten with a desire to +rush into print, and I overheard them concocting a tragic Love Story +in the kitchen, and they were highly indignant later on, because the +Doctor-in-Law would not accept it. You can hardly wonder at it though, +for it really was too bad for anything. + +It was called "The Viscount's Revenge," and in it several characters +who had been killed in the first part of the book kept cropping up all +through the story in a most confusing manner, while One-and-Nine and +General Mary Jane could not agree as to whether the heroine should be +dark or fair, so in one part of the book she had beautiful golden hair +and blue eyes, and in another she was described as "darkly, proudly +handsome, with a wealth of dusky hair and eyes as black as night." + + [Illustration: THE LITERARY HOUSEMAID] + +At the last moment it was found necessary to include another poem in +the magazine, and, as all of the Rhymester's were too long, the +Doctor-in-Law decided to write one himself, which he called + +COMMERCIAL PROBLEMS. + + Why doth the little busy bee + Not charge so much an hour, + For gathering honey day by day + From every opening flower? + + And can you tell me why, good sir, + The birds receive no pay + For singing sweetly in the grove + Throughout the livelong day? + + Why flow'rs should bloom about the place + And give their perfume free, + In so unbusinesslike a way, + Seems very odd to me. + + I cannot meet a single cow + That charges for her milk, + And though they are not paid a sou, + The silkworms still spin silk. + + While ducks and hens, I grieve to find, + Lay eggs for nothing too, + Which is a most ridiculous + And foolish thing to do. + + These problems often puzzle me; + I lie awake at night, + And think and think what I can do + To set this matter right. + + I've found a way at last, and though + It may at first seem funny, + It cannot fail--'tis this: _You_ pay, + And _I'll_ collect the money. + + + + +CHAPTER X + +THE WALLYPUG GOES TO WINDSOR + + +While they were all busy in the preparation of _The Wallypug's Own_, I +thought it an excellent opportunity to run down to Folkestone in order +to make arrangements for hiring a house, as I intended taking my +guests to the seaside for a few weeks. + +I felt a little anxious about leaving them to themselves, but hoped +that they would be too busy and interested in the new magazine to get +into trouble. + +It was most unfortunate that I should have gone just then though, for +directly I had left the Wallypug received a polite letter from one of +the Court officials to say that the Queen would be pleased to receive +his Majesty and suite at Windsor on the following day. + + [Illustration: A ROYAL INVITATION] + +Of course, as you may imagine, the Wallypug was in a great state of +excitement at receiving this royal invitation, and wished to telegraph +at once for me to return and advise them how to act and what to do, on +this important occasion; however, the Doctor-in-Law, so I have been +given to understand, persuaded his Majesty not to do anything of the +sort, and added that I "was always poking about and interfering, and +was better out of the way"; so his Majesty, who was very anxious to do +the right thing, consulted Mrs. Putchy as to the proper costume to be +worn, and the etiquette to be observed. + +"Well, your Majesty," remarked Mrs. Putchy in reply, "I scarcely know +what to advise. When in my younger days, I acted as lady's maid to the +Countess of Wembley, I know her ladyship wore a Court train and +carried a bouquet when she was presented to the Queen." + +"Where did the engine go?" asked his Majesty curiously. + +"The engine!" exclaimed Mrs. Putchy. + +"Yes; you said she wore a train, didn't you?" said the Wallypug. + +"Oh! but I didn't mean that kind of train," laughed Mrs. Putchy; "I +meant a long sort of cloak fastened on to the shoulders and trailing +along the ground at the back--they are generally made of satin and +velvet, and are decorated with flowers and feathers and lace, and that +sort of thing. Your Majesty's cloak would do nicely if I trimmed it +for you." + +"But are you sure that gentlemen wear these sort of things?" inquired +the Wallypug. + +"Well, I couldn't rightly say, your Majesty, but I'm sure I've seen +pictures of kings and such like wearing trains which were borne by +pages, so I feel sure your Majesty would be safe in wearing one." + +So it was arranged that, after having been carefully brushed, his +Majesty's velvet cloak was to be gaily decorated with lace and large +bunches of flowers, and, to make the thing complete, a large bouquet +was tied around his sceptre, and, at the Rhymester's suggestion, +little knots of flowers were attached to the knobs of his Majesty's +crown. + +The little man was highly delighted with his appearance when all these +arrangements were concluded, and could get but very little sleep that +night for thinking of the great honour which was to be his the next +day. + +The whole household was early astir in the morning, and at about +eleven o'clock the carriage came to take the royal guests to the +station. + +Arrived at Waterloo, the Doctor-in-Law, after making various inquiries +as to the price of the tickets, etc., actually had the meanness, +despite the remonstrance of the railway officials, to insist upon the +whole party travelling down third-class, remarking that he "found the +third-class carriages reached there quite as soon as the first, and a +penny saved was a penny gained." + +The station master at Windsor was particularly put out about it, as, +in honour of his Majesty's visit, the station had been gaily decorated +and a carpet laid down to the carriage door. His Majesty, however, +made a brave show as he walked up the platform preceded by the +Doctor-in-Law, his gaily decorated train borne by the Rhymester, and +followed by A. Fish, Esq., and One-and-Nine, the latter carrying a +mysterious bandbox, which contained a present from the Wallypug to her +Majesty. (See frontispiece.) + +Inside and out the station was crowded with curious spectators, all +eager to catch a glimpse of his Majesty and his remarkable retinue, +and cheer after cheer resounded as the station master, bare-headed and +bowing, ushered the party to the royal carriage with the red and +gold-liveried servants, which had been sent from the castle to meet +them. + +The bells were ringing, and the streets were crowded as they drove +through the old town, and his Majesty thoroughly enjoyed the drive, +while the Doctor-in-Law was quite in his element amidst all this fuss +and excitement. + +I did not care to inquire too fully into the details of his Majesty's +interview with the Queen, but I was given to understand that the whole +party was treated with the utmost kindness. + +Her Majesty graciously accepted at the Wallypug's hands a gilded +crown, an exact copy of the one he wore himself, and which he had had +made expressly for her Majesty, having been struck by the fact that +her Majesty's real crown was always kept locked up in the Tower, and +hoping that perhaps this one would do for second best. + +I could not gather that her Majesty had actually promised to wear it, +but I do know that the Wallypug was made exceedingly proud and happy +by the gift of a portrait of her Majesty herself, with the royal +autograph attached, and that he will always remember the occasion of +his visit to Windsor, and the kindness with which he was treated by +everyone, particularly by the little Princes and Princesses, her +Majesty's great grand-children, who led him about the Castle grounds, +and showed him their pets, and the flowers, and conservatories, and +all the wonderful sights of that wonderful place. + +In the evening there was a dinner party, at which her Majesty did not +appear, and early the next morning a royal carriage again drove them +to the station _en route_ for London. + +All this I learned on my return from Folkestone. I also heard of an +extraordinary evening party which had been given at my house during my +absence. It appears that the invitations had been sent out by the +Doctor-in-Law the very day upon which I left, and about thirty guests, +including the Duchess of Mortlake, had been invited. Unfortunately, +however, this visit to Windsor had entirely driven the matter from the +Wallypug's mind, and the others had forgotten about it too, and so a +pretty confusion was the result. + +It appears that one evening about seven o'clock they were all in the +kitchen making toffee, having persuaded Mrs. Putchy to let them have +the frying-pan and some sugar and butter, and it having been cooking +for some time the Doctor-in-Law had just told the Wallypug to stick +his finger in and see if it was done, when Mrs. Putchy came in to say +that some ladies and gentlemen had arrived, and were waiting in the +drawing-room. + + [Illustration: TO SEE IF IT WAS DONE] + +All of a sudden it flashed upon their minds that _this_ was the +evening upon which they had invited their visitors to the party. +Whatever was to be done? Not the slightest preparation had been +made--and his Majesty and the others were all more or less in a sticky +condition, and quite unfit to be seen by company. + +A hurried consultation took place, during which they could hear more +and more guests arriving, and at last, by a brilliant inspiration, the +Doctor-in-Law thought of making it a surprise party, similar to those +given in America. + +"It won't cost us anything either," he remarked complacently. + +"But what is a surprise party?" asked the others. + +"Never mind, you'll see presently," remarked the little man. "Run and +wash your hands now and make yourselves tidy." + +A few minutes later the whole party filed into the drawing-room, the +Wallypug looking rather blank and nervous, and the Doctor-in-Law full +of profuse apologies for having kept the guests waiting so long. + +"By the way," he remarked airily, "I suppose you all know that it's a +surprise party." + +"Dear me, no," said the Duchess of Mortlake, speaking for the others. +"Whatever is that; I don't think it was mentioned on the cards of +invitation, was it?" + +"Ah! a trifling oversight," remarked the Doctor-in-Law. "A surprise +party," he continued in explanation, "is one at which each guest is +expected to contribute something towards the supper--some bring one +thing and some another. What have you brought, may I ask, your Grace?" + +"Well, really," said the Duchess, "I've never heard of such a thing in +my life before. I've not brought anything at all, of course; I'm +surprised at your asking me such a question." + +"Ah, yes, just so," remarked the Doctor-in-Law triumphantly, "just +what I told you--a _surprise_ party, don't you see! Now, what I would +advise is that you should all go out and order various things to be +sent in for supper; we, for our part, will provide some excellent +toffee, and then you can come back and help us to set the tables and +all that sort of thing, you know--it's the greatest fun in the world, +I assure you." + +And really the little man carried it off with such gaiety, that +entering into the spirit of the thing the guests really did as he +suggested, and went out and ordered the things, and afterwards came +back, and, amidst great laughter and fun, the tables were laid, every +one doing some share of the work, with the exception of the +Doctor-in-Law, who contented himself with directing the others and +chatting to the ladies. + + [Illustration: THE WALLYPUG HELPS] + +The poor dear Wallypug amiably toiled backward and forward between the +kitchen and dining-room with great piles of plates and other heavy +articles, and A. Fish, Esq., in his eagerness to help, was continually +treading on his own tail, upsetting himself and the various dishes +entrusted to his charge. + + [Illustration: A. FISH, ESQ., UPSET] + +At last, however, the supper was set, and the merriest evening you can +possibly imagine was spent by the guests. His Majesty was in capital +spirits, and after supper suggested a little dancing, which suggestion +was hailed with delight by the others, and, having moved some of the +furniture out of the drawing-room and pushed the rest away into +corners, the Wallypug led off with her Grace the Duchess of Mortlake, +and quite distinguished himself in "Sir Roger de Coverley." Afterwards +there was a little singing and music, several of the guests +contributing to the evening's entertainment. Amongst other items was a +song by A. Fish, Esq., rendered as well as his bad cold would permit, +of which the first lines ran: + + I'b siddig here ad lookig at the bood, love, + Ad thinkig ov the habby days of old, + Wed you ad I had each a wooded spood, love, + To eat our porridge wed we had a cold. + +Altogether the evening was such a success that her Grace declared that +it should not be her fault if surprise parties were not the fashion in +Society during the coming winter. + + + + +CHAPTER XI + +HIS MAJESTY AT THE SEASIDE + + +I sent Mrs. Putchy and General Mary Jane down to the house, which I +had engaged on the "Lees" at Folkestone, the day before we were to go, +in order to see that everything was ready for us. + +"The only thing that is wrong is the kitchen chimney, and that smokes, +sir," said Mrs. Putchy, in answer to my inquiry on the night of our +arrival. "I think that we had better have the sweep in the morning, +sir." + +"Very well, Mrs. Putchy, I'm sure you know best," I replied, and +thought no more of the matter. + +Early in the morning, however, I was awakened by screams and cries +proceeding from the lower part of the house. + +"Help! help! Burglars! Fire and police! Thieves!" screamed a voice, +and hastily dressing myself, I rushed out into the passage, and was +confronted by the Rhymester, who had evidently just jumped out of bed, +and who, though it was broad daylight, bore a lighted candle in one +hand, and a pair of fire tongs in the other. + +His teeth were chattering with fright, and his knees were knocking +together from the same cause. + +"What's the matter," I asked in alarm. + +"Oh! oh! there are burglars in the house," he cried excitedly, "and +the others have gone down to them; I'm sure they'll be killed--I told +them not to go, but they would. Let's go and hide under a bed +somewhere. Oh! oh, what will become of us?" + +"Don't be such a coward," I cried, hurrying down stairs, while the +poor little Rhymester, afraid to be left alone upstairs, tremblingly +followed. + +Sure enough there was a sound of struggling going on, and voices +raised in loud dispute. + +"Oh, that story won't do for me," I heard the Doctor-in-Law exclaim. + +"But I tell yez, sor," chimed in another strange voice, "I waz only +going to----" + +"Never mind what you were going to do, give up the sack," said the +Doctor-in-Law. + +Then there were sounds of struggling, and amidst the confusion a voice +saying: + +"Hold him down! Sit on him! That's right! Now for the sack." + +And, bursting the door open, a curious sight met my eyes. A poor sweep +lay flat upon the floor, with the Wallypug sitting upon him, and +One-and-Nine keeping guard; while the Doctor-in-Law and A. Fish, Esq., +examined his bag of soot in the corner. The poor little Rhymester +summoned up sufficient courage to peep in at the doorway, and stood +there making a piteous picture, with his white face and trembling +limbs. + +"Whatever is the matter," I inquired as soon as I entered. + +"We've caught him!" exclaimed his Majesty, complacently wriggling his +toes about. + +"But what's he been doing," I asked. + + [Illustration: "WE'VE CAUGHT HIM!"] + +"Av ye plaze, sor," groaned the man, panting beneath the Wallypug's +weight, "I have been doing nothing at all, at all. I waz just +a-finishin' me warrak of swapin' the chimneys, wen one ov the ould +gintleman came up an' poked me in the nose with a sthick, and the +other ould gintleman knocked me over and sthole me bag, while the +soger hild me down till the other gintleman sat on me--it's among a +lot of murtherin' thaves I've got entoirely, savin' yer presince, +sor." + +"The man is a burglar," declared the Doctor-in-Law emphatically. "I +happened to hear a very suspicious noise down here, and calling to the +others, rushed down just in time to catch this man making off with a +bag of things. I think he was trying to escape up the chimney, for his +head was half-way up when we entered, and this bag, which evidently +contains plunder of some kind, is covered with soot too." + +"Why, the man is a sweep, and was sweeping the chimney," I cried, +pointing to his brushes and sticks; and after a lot of explanations +the man was told to get up and his Majesty, followed by the others, +retired to his bedroom, evidently greatly disappointed that it was not +a real burglar that they had been combating. + +The sweep, who was a very good-natured Irishman, took it in very good +part, and the present of half-a-crown sent him away quite reconciled +to his assailants. + +The Rhymester afterwards made a great boast that he had not taken any +part in the melee. + +"Of course I knew all along that he wasn't a burglar," he declared, +"and that's the reason why I wouldn't interfere." + +"You managed to do a good deal of screaming though, I noticed," +remarked the Doctor-in-Law grumpily. + +"Ah! that was only for fun," asserted the Rhymester. + +This was really about the only remarkable incident which occurred +during our holiday at Folkestone, which passed very pleasantly and +very quietly. We went for a sea bathe nearly every day, and his +Majesty would insist upon wearing his crown in the water on every +occasion. + +"No one will know that I am a king if I don't," he declared; and I am +bound to admit that his Majesty did not look very regal in his bathing +costume, particularly when he was dripping with water and his long +straight hair hung half over his face, and even when he wore his +crown he was continually catching bits of seaweed in it, which gave +him a singularly untidy appearance for a king. + + [Illustration: HIS MAJESTY DID NOT LOOK VERY REGAL] + +A. Fish, Esq., with the assistance of a lifebuoy, nearly learned to +swim while we were down there; but the Doctor-in-Law thought that +hiring bathing machines was a foolish waste of money, and contented +himself with taking off his shoes and stockings and paddling, which he +could do without having to pay. One day, however, he was knocked +completely over by an incoming wave, and got wet to the skin. + +We could never persuade the Rhymester either, to go out further than +just to his knees; but I rather fancy that that was because he was +afraid of wetting his bathing costume, of which he was particularly +proud, and which was decorated with smart little bows of ribbon +wherever they could be conveniently put. + +Fear may have had something to do with it though, for I noticed that +he always clung very tightly to the rope, and never by any chance went +beyond its length. + +The switchback railway was a source of infinite amusement, and a great +deal of time was spent on it. Boating was not much indulged in, as it +made one or two of the party, particularly A. Fish, Esq., very ill; +but we all enjoyed the beautiful drives in the neighbourhood. There +was an excellent Punch and Judy show in the town too, which so +fascinated his Majesty that we could scarcely tear him away whenever +he joined the admiring crowd which daily surrounded it. + +The fickle One-and-Nine, while we were here, fell in love with a wax +figure exhibited in a hair-dresser's window in Sandgate Road. It +represented a beautiful lady with her hair dressed in the latest +fashion, and the wooden soldier was greatly infatuated. He spent +hours gazing through the window, watching the lady slowly revolve by +clockwork; and he became frightfully jealous of the hair-dresser, whom +he caught one morning rearranging the drapery around the lady's +shoulders. + +Eventually, with the assistance of the Rhymester, he composed the +following piece of poetry--which he stuck, by means of six gelatine +sweets, on to the hair-dresser's window with the writing inside, in +order that the lady might see it. + +TO THE BEAUTIFUL LADY IN THE HAIRDRESSER'S WINDOW. + + I love you, oh! I love you, + And I beg you to be mine; + I'm a gallant wooden soldier, + And my name is 1/9. + + If you will only marry me, + 'Twill be the greatest fun + To puzzle folks by telling them, + That we're both 2/1. + + 'Twill be the truth, for man and wife + Are one, I beg to state, + This fact's as clear as 4/4, + Or 2/6 make 8. + + They tell me, dear, you have no feet; + But what is that to me? + 2 feet be 4/2 behind + On animals you see. + + That you have none, is 0 to me, + Dear 1/4 your sake, + No trifles such as these shall e'er + My true affections shake. + + I bought some penny tarts for you, + But I am much distrest + To tell you by mistake I sat + On 1/8 the rest. + +One-and-Nine was quite happy in finding that the paper had disappeared +from the shop window when he passed by a little later, and declared +that it must mean that the lady had accepted him and his poetry. + +I think the funniest incident of all though, in connection with our +visit to Folkestone, was when his Majesty and the others went into +Carlo Maestrani's for some ices. + +They had never tasted any before, and were very much surprised to find +them so cold. I shall never forget the expression on the Wallypug's +face when, having rather greedily taken a very large mouthful, he +could not swallow it, or dispose of it in any way. A. Fish, Esq., +declared that it gave him a violent toothache; while the Doctor-in-Law +called for the waiter, and insisted upon him taking it away. + + [Illustration: "IT'S NOT PROPERLY COOKED"] + +"It's not properly cooked," he declared angrily. "It's cold." + +"Cook, sare, no, sare, it is not cook," agreed the waiter. + +"Very well, then, take it away and bring us some that is. Have it +warmed up; do something with it. It's disgraceful bringing us stuff +like that." + +And no argument or persuasion would convince the little man that the +ices were as they should be. + + + + +CHAPTER XII + +THE DEPARTURE + + +We remained at Folkestone till the latter part of September, and then +returned to London just about the time that the first number of _The +Wallypug's Own_ made its appearance. + +It caused quite a sensation in literary circles, and was mentioned by +most of the papers; but it did _not_ turn out a monetary success, and +so the Doctor-in-Law declared that he must devise some other means of +making money. + +We had been once or twice to the circus, and I fancy that it must +have been his intention to start something of the sort himself, for I +caught him one day trying to teach his Majesty to walk the tight-rope; +but as he had only tied the rope between two very light chairs the +result was not very satisfactory, particularly to the poor Wallypug, +who came to the ground with a terrific crash. + +A. Fish, Esq., dressed as a clown, and certainly looked very funny; +but his bad cold prevented him from speaking his jokes distinctly, and +so the idea was given up. + + [Illustration: THE RESULT WAS NOT SATISFACTORY] + +In fact it was not till November that the Doctor-in-Law hit upon a +plan which seemed to give him any great satisfaction. We had been +talking a great deal about Guy Fawkes' day and the fireworks at the +Crystal Palace, which we intended going to see in the evening, and +the Doctor-in-Law had been particularly curious to know all about the +day and its customs. He did not say much about his plans, but I felt +sure that he was up to some of his tricks, for I caught him several +times whispering mysteriously to the Rhymester and A. Fish, Esq., and +I noticed that they were all particularly kind and respectful to his +Majesty, as though they wished to keep him in a good humour. + +On the morning of the fifth, when I came down to breakfast, I was +greatly surprised to find that the whole party had gone out about an +hour previous, after borrowing from Mrs. Putchy a kitchen chair, four +broomsticks, and a long piece of clothes-line. Whatever were they up +to? + +I asked Mrs. Putchy if they had left any message, but no--they had +said nothing as to where they were going, what they were going to do, +or when they would be back; and the only thing that had struck Mrs. +Putchy as being at all remarkable about their appearance, was the fact +that the Rhymester had added little bows of coloured ribbon to his +costume, and wore a tall pointed cap gaily decorated with streamers, +and a deep white frill around his neck--the others were dressed as +usual. + +I felt sure that some mischief was brewing, and could not settle down +to my work for thinking of them. About eleven o'clock I went out to +see if I could find any traces of my guests. I had been walking about +unsuccessfully for about an hour, when I heard some boys shouting, and +turning to look in their direction, I beheld his Majesty calmly seated +in a chair which, by means of long poles attached to it, was being +carried along by the Rhymester and A. Fish, Esq. + +They were followed by a crowd of people who were cheering lustily, and +the Doctor-in-Law was rushing about collecting money in his hat, and +entreating the people "not to forget the fifth of November," and +repeating some doggerel verse about: + + "Guy Fawkes guy, + Stick him up high; + Stick him on a lamp-post, + And there let him die," + +while several little boys were dancing about in great excitement, and +shouting, "Holler, boys! holler! here's another guy." + + [Illustration: A TRIUMPHAL PROCESSION] + +His Majesty evidently regarded it as a great compliment to himself, +and complacently bowed right and left with considerable dignity. And I +found out that the Doctor-in-Law had persuaded him into believing that +this triumphal procession had been arranged solely in his Majesty's +honour. + +I was naturally very vexed at the poor Wallypug being imposed upon in +this manner, and spoke very plainly to the Doctor-in-Law about it on +our way home, and I think the little man must have taken it very much +to heart, for he seemed quite subdued, and actually himself suggested +sharing the proceeds of the collection with the others. + +We went to see the fireworks in the evening, and I don't ever remember +seeing the party in such excellent spirits as they were that night. + +Mrs. Putchy had prepared a capital supper for us on our return, and I +love to remember my friends as they appeared sitting around the supper +table talking over the adventures and excitements of the day. I can +see them now whenever I close my eyes--the dear old Wallypug at the +head of the table, with One-and-Nine in attendance, and the others +all talking at once about the jolly time they had had at the Skating +Rink in the afternoon, when A. Fish, Esq., had vainly tried to get +along with roller-skates fastened on to his tail. + + [Illustration: A CAPITAL STORY] + +I say I love to remember them thus, for it was the last occasion upon +which we were all together. Early the next morning Mrs. Putchy came to +my room, and in a very agitated voice said, "Please sir, I'm afraid +that there is something wrong; I have knocked at his Majesty's door +and can get no answer, and the Doctor-in-Law's room is empty too." + +I hurried down, and on the breakfast table I found a letter addressed +to me, in which his Majesty, on behalf of the others, thanked me very +heartily for my hospitality, and explained that State matters of the +utmost importance had necessitated their immediate return to Why. How +they went I have never been able to discover. + +The outer door of my flat was found to be locked on the inside as +usual, and the windows were all fastened; besides which, as they were +some distance from the ground, the Royal party could scarcely have got +out that way. + +Altogether the whole affair was involved in a mystery which I have +never been able to solve to this day. Of course I miss my strange, +but withal lovable visitors, very much, and I value very highly the +several little mementoes of their visit which remained behind. Amongst +others is a cheque of the Doctor-in-Law's for a considerable amount; +which, however, I shall never be able to cash, as it is drawn upon the +bank of, "Don't-you-wish-you-may-get-it," at Why. + +General Mary Jane was inconsolable for some time after the departure +of her soldier hero, but eventually married our milkman, a very +steady and respectable man in the neighbourhood. Girlie and Boy and +many other friends of the Wallypug greatly regretted that they were +unable to say good-bye to his Majesty before he left; and often and +often, as I sit alone in my study, I think about the simple-natured, +good-hearted little fellow, and his remarkable followers, and wonder +if I shall ever see them again. Who knows? + + [Illustration: I OFTEN THINK OF THEM] + + + THE END + + + GLASGOW: PRINTED AT THE UNIVERSITY PRESS BY + ROBERT MACLEHOSE AND CO. + + + * * * * * + + + + + A CATALOGUE OF BOOKS + AND ANNOUNCEMENTS OF + METHUEN AND COMPANY + PUBLISHERS: LONDON + 36 ESSEX STREET + W.C. + +CONTENTS + + + PAGE + FORTHCOMING BOOKS, 2 + POETRY, 10 + BELLES LETTRES, 11 + ILLUSTRATED BOOKS, 13 + HISTORY, 14 + BIOGRAPHY, 16 + TRAVEL, ADVENTURE AND TOPOGRAPHY, 18 + GENERAL LITERATURE, 19 + SCIENCE, 21 + PHILOSOPHY, 22 + THEOLOGY, 22 + LEADERS OF RELIGION, 24 + FICTION, 25 + BOOKS FOR BOYS AND GIRLS, 34 + THE PEACOCK LIBRARY, 35 + UNIVERSITY EXTENSION SERIES, 35 + SOCIAL QUESTIONS OF TO-DAY, 36 + CLASSICAL TRANSLATIONS, 37 + EDUCATIONAL BOOKS, 38 + +NOVEMBER 1897 + + + + + NOVEMBER 1897. + MESSRS. METHUEN'S + ANNOUNCEMENTS + + + #Poetry# + + + SHAKESPEARE'S POEMS. Edited, with an Introduction and Notes, + by GEORGE WYNDHAM, M.P. _Crown 8vo._ _Buckram. 6s._ + + This is a volume of the sonnets and lesser poems of Shakespeare, + and is prefaced with an elaborate Introduction by Mr. Wyndham. + + + ENGLISH LYRICS. Selected and Edited by W. E. HENLEY. + _Crown 8vo._ _Buckram. 6s._ + + Also 15 copies on Japanese paper. _Demy 8vo._ _L2, 2s. net._ + + Few announcements will be more welcome to lovers of English verse + than the one that Mr. Henley is bringing together into one book the + finest lyrics in our language. + + + NURSERY RHYMES. With many Coloured Pictures. By F. D. BEDFORD. + _Small 4to._ _5s._ + + This book has many beautiful designs in colour to illustrate the + old rhymes. + + + THE ODYSSEY OF HOMER. A Translation by J. G. CORDERY. + _Crown 8vo._ _7s. 6d._ + + + #Travel and Adventure# + + + BRITISH CENTRAL AFRICA. By Sir H. H. JOHNSTON, K.C.B. With nearly + Two Hundred Illustrations, and Six Maps. _Crown 4to._ _30s. net._ + + CONTENTS.--(1) The History of Nyasaland and British Central Africa + generally. (2) A detailed description of the races and languages of + British Central Africa. (3) Chapters on the European settlers and + missionaries; the Fauna, the Flora, minerals, and scenery. (4) A + chapter on the prospects of the country. + + + WITH THE GREEKS IN THESSALY. By W. KINNAIRD ROSE, Reuter's + Correspondent. With Plans and 23 Illustrations. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + A history of the operations in Thessaly by one whose brilliant + despatches from the seat of war attracted universal attention. + + + THE BENIN MASSACRE. By CAPTAIN BOISRAGON. With Portrait and Map. + _Crown 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + This volume is written by one of the two survivors who escaped the + terrible massacre in Benin at the beginning of this year. The author + relates in detail his adventures and his extraordinary escape, and + adds a description of the country and of the events which led up to + the outbreak. + + + FROM TONKIN TO INDIA. By PRINCE HENRI OF ORLEANS. Translated by HAMLEY + BENT, M.A. With 80 Illustrations and a Map. _Crown 4to._ _25s._ + + The travels of Prince Henri in 1895 from China to the valley of the + Bramaputra covered a distance of 2100 miles, of which 1600 was through + absolutely unexplored country. No fewer than seventeen ranges of + mountains were crossed at altitudes of from 11,000 to 13,000 feet. The + journey was made memorable by the discovery of the sources of the + Irrawaddy. To the physical difficulties of the journey were added + dangers from the attacks of savage tribes. The book deals with many of + the burning political problems of the East, and it will be found a + most important contribution to the literature of adventure and + discovery. + + + THREE YEARS IN SAVAGE AFRICA. By LIONEL DECLE. With an Introduction by + H. M. STANLEY, M.P. With 100 Illustrations and 5 Maps. + _Demy 8vo._ _21s._ + + Few Europeans have had the same opportunity of studying the barbarous + parts of Africa as Mr. Decle. Starting from the Cape, he visited in + succession Bechuanaland, the Zambesi, Matabeleland and Mashonaland, + the Portuguese settlement on the Zambesi, Nyasaland, Ujiji, the + headquarters of the Arabs, German East Africa, Uganda (where he saw + fighting in company with the late Major 'Roddy' Owen), and British + East Africa. In his book he relates his experiences, his minute + observations of native habits and customs, and his views as to the + work done in Africa by the various European Governments, whose + operations he was able to study. The whole journey extended over 7000 + miles, and occupied exactly three years. + + + WITH THE MOUNTED INFANTRY IN MASHONALAND. By Lieut.-Colonel ALDERSON. + With numerous Illustrations and Plans. _Demy 8vo._ _12s. 6d._ + + This is an account of the military operations in Mashonaland by the + officer who commanded the troops in that district during the late + rebellion. Besides its interest as a story of warfare, it will have a + peculiar value as an account of the services of mounted infantry by + one of the chief authorities on the subject. + + + THE HILL OF THE GRACES: OR, THE GREAT STONE TEMPLES OF TRIPOLI. By + H. S. COWPER, F.S.A. With Maps, Plans, and 75 Illustrations. + _Demy 8vo._ _10s. 6d._ + + A record of two journeys through Tripoli in 1895 and 1896. The book + treats of a remarkable series of megalithic temples which have + hitherto been uninvestigated, and contains a large amount of new + geographical and archaeological matter. + + + ADVENTURE AND EXPLORATION IN AFRICA. By Captain A. ST. H. GIBBONS, + F.R.G.S. With Illustrations by C. WHYMPER, and Maps. _Demy 8vo._ _21s._ + + This is an account of travel and adventure among the Marotse and + contiguous tribes, with a description of their customs, + characteristics, and history, together with the author's experiences + in hunting big game. The illustrations are by Mr. Charles Whymper, and + from photographs. There is a map by the author of the hitherto + unexplored regions lying between the Zambezi and Kafukwi rivers and + from 18 deg. to 15 deg. S. lat. + + + #History and Biography# + + + A HISTORY OF EGYPT, FROM THE EARLIEST TIMES TO THE PRESENT DAY. Edited + by W. M. FLINDERS PETRIE, D.C.L., LL.D., Professor of Egyptology at + University College. _Fully Illustrated._ _In Six Volumes._ + _Crown 8vo._ _6s. each._ + + VOL. V. ROMAN EGYPT. By J. G. MILNE. + + + THE DECLINE AND FALL OF THE ROMAN EMPIRE. By EDWARD GIBBON. A New + Edition, edited with Notes, Appendices, and Maps by J. B. BURY, M.A., + Fellow of Trinity College, Dublin. _In Seven Volumes._ _Demy 8vo, gilt + top._ _8s. 6d. each._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s. each._ _Vol. IV._ + + + THE LETTERS OF VICTOR HUGO. Translated from the French by F. CLARKE, + M.A. _In Two Volumes._ _Demy 8vo._ _10s. 6d. each._ _Vol. II._ + 1835-72. + + This is the second volume of one of the most interesting and important + collection of letters ever published in France. The correspondence + dates from Victor Hugo's boyhood to his death, and none of the letters + have been published before. + + + A HISTORY OF THE GREAT NORTHERN RAILWAY, 1845-95. By C. H. GRINLING. + With Maps and Illustrations. _Demy 8vo._ _10s. 6d._ + + A record of Railway enterprise and development in Northern England, + containing much matter hitherto unpublished. It appeals both to the + general reader and to those specially interested in railway + construction and management. + + + A HISTORY OF BRITISH COLONIAL POLICY. By H. E. EGERTON, M.A. + _Demy 8vo._ _12s. 6d._ + + This book deals with British Colonial policy historically from the + beginnings of English colonisation down to the present day. The + subject has been treated by itself, and it has thus been possible + within a reasonable compass to deal with a mass of authority which + must otherwise be sought in the State papers. The volume is divided + into five parts:--(1) The Period of Beginnings, 1497-1650; (2) Trade + Ascendancy, 1651-1830; (3) The Granting of Responsible Government, + 1831-1860; (4) _Laissez Aller_, 1861-1885; (5) Greater Britain. + + + A HISTORY OF ANARCHISM. By E. V. ZENKER. Translated from the German. + _Demy 8vo._ _10s. 6d._ + + A critical study and history, as well as a powerful and trenchant + criticism, of the Anarchist movement in Europe. The book has aroused + considerable attention on the Continent. + + + THE LIFE OF ERNEST RENAN. By MADAME DARMESTETER. With Portrait. + _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + A biography of Renan by one of his most intimate friends. + + + A LIFE OF DONNE. By AUGUSTUS JESSOPP, D.D. With Portrait. + _Crown 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + This is a new volume of the 'Leaders of Religion' series, from the + learned and witty pen of the Rector of Scarning, who has been able + to embody the results of much research. + + + OLD HARROW DAYS. By J. G. COTTON MINCHIN. _Crown 8vo._ _5s._ + + A volume of reminiscences which will be interesting to old Harrovians + and to many of the general public. + + + #Theology# + + + A PRIMER OF THE BIBLE. By Prof. W. H. BENNETT. _Crown 8vo._ _2s. 6d._ + + This Primer sketches the history of the books which make up the Bible, + in the light of recent criticism. It gives an account of their + character, origin, and composition, as far as possible in + chronological order, with special reference to their relations to one + another and to the history of Israel and the Church. The formation of + the Canon is illustrated by chapters on the Apocrypha (Old and New + Testament); and there is a brief notice of the history of the Bible + since the close of the Canon. + + + LIGHT AND LEAVEN: HISTORICAL AND SOCIAL SERMONS. By the Rev. H. + HENSLEY HENSON, M.A., Fellow of All Souls', Incumbent of St. Mary's + Hospital, Ilford. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + _Devotional Series_ + + + THE CONFESSIONS OF ST. AUGUSTINE. Newly Translated, with an + Introduction, by C. BIGG, D.D., late Student of Christ Church. With a + Frontispiece. _18mo._ _1s. 6d._ + + This little book is the first volume of a new Devotional Series, + printed in clear type, and published at a very low price. + + This volume contains the nine books of the 'Confessions' which are + suitable for devotional purposes. The name of the Editor is a + sufficient guarantee of the excellence of the edition. + + + THE HOLY SACRIFICE. By F. WESTON, M.A., Curate of St. Matthew's, + Westminster. _18mo._ _1s._ + + A small volume of devotions at the Holy Communion. + + + #Naval and Military# + + + A HISTORY OF THE ART OF WAR. By C. W. OMAN, M.A., Fellow of All + Souls', Oxford. _Demy 8vo._ _Illustrated._ _21s._ + + Vol. II. MEDIAEVAL WARFARE. + + Mr. Oman is engaged on a History of the Art of War, of which the + above, though covering the middle period from the fall of the Roman + Empire to the general use of gunpowder in Western Europe, is the first + instalment. The first battle dealt with will be Adrianople (378) and + the last Navarette (1367). There will appear later a volume dealing + with the Art of War among the Ancients, and another covering the 15th, + 16th, and 17th centuries. + + The book will deal mainly with tactics and strategy, fortifications + and siegecraft, but subsidiary chapters will give some account of the + development of arms and armour, and of the various forms of military + organization known to the Middle Ages. + + + A SHORT HISTORY OF THE ROYAL NAVY, FROM EARLY TIMES TO THE PRESENT + DAY. By DAVID HANNAY. Illustrated. _2 Vols. Demy 8vo._ _7s. 6d. each._ + Vol. I. + + This book aims at giving an account not only of the fighting we have + done at sea, but of the growth of the service, of the part the Navy + has played in the development of the Empire, and of its inner life. + + + THE STORY OF THE BRITISH ARMY. By Lieut.-Colonel COOPER KING, of the + Staff College, Camberley. Illustrated. _Demy 8vo._ _7s. 6d._ + + This volume aims at describing the nature of the different armies that + have been formed in Great Britain, and how from the early and feudal + levies the present standing army came to be. The changes in tactics, + uniform, and armament are briefly touched upon, and the campaigns in + which the army has shared have been so far followed as to explain the + part played by British regiments in them. + + + #General Literature# + + + THE OLD ENGLISH HOME. By S. BARING-GOULD. With numerous Plans and + Illustrations. _Crown 8vo._ _7s. 6d._ + + This book, like Mr. Baring-Gould's well-known 'Old Country Life,' + describes the life and environment of an old English family. + + + OXFORD AND ITS COLLEGES. By J. WELLS, M.A., Fellow and Tutor of + Wadham College. Illustrated by E. H. NEW. _Fcap. 8vo._ + _3s._ _Leather._ _4s._ + + This is a guide--chiefly historical--to the Colleges of Oxford. It + contains numerous illustrations. + + + VOCES ACADEMICAE. By C. GRANT ROBERTSON, M.A., Fellow of All Souls', + Oxford. _With a Frontispiece._ _Fcap. 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + This is a volume of light satirical dialogues and should be read by + all who are interested in the life of Oxford. + + + A PRIMER OF WORDSWORTH. By LAURIE MAGNUS. _Crown 8vo._ _2s. 6d._ + + This volume is uniform with the Primers of Tennyson and Burns, and + contains a concise biography of the poet, a critical appreciation of + his work in detail, and a bibliography. + + + NEO-MALTHUSIANISM. By R. USSHER, M.A. _Cr. 8vo._ _6s._ + + This book deals with a very delicate but most important matter, + namely, the voluntary limitation of the family, and how such action + affects morality, the individual, and the nation. + + + PRIMAEVAL SCENES. By H. N. HUTCHINSON, B.A., F.G.S., Author of 'Extinct + Monsters,' 'Creatures of Other Days,' 'Prehistoric Man and Beast,' + etc. With numerous Illustrations drawn by JOHN HASSALL and FRED. V. + BURRIDGE. _4to._ _6s._ + + A set of twenty drawings, with short text to each, to illustrate the + humorous aspects of prehistoric times. They are carefully planned by + the author so as to be scientifically and archaeologically correct and + at the same time amusing. + + + THE WALLYPUG IN LONDON. By G. E. FARROW, Author of 'The Wallypug of + Why.' With numerous Illustrations. _Crown 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + An extravaganza for children, written with great charm and vivacity. + + + RAILWAY NATIONALIZATION. By CLEMENT EDWARDS. _Social Questions + Series._ _Crown 8vo._ _2s. 6d._ + + + #Sport# + + + SPORTING AND ATHLETIC RECORDS. By H. MORGAN BROWNE. _Crown 8vo._ + _1s. paper;_ _2s. cloth._ + + This book gives, in a clear and complete form, accurate records of the + best performances in all important branches of Sport. It is an + attempt, never yet made, to present all-important sporting records in + a systematic way. + + + THE GOLFING PILGRIM. By HORACE G. HUTCHINSON. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + This book, by a famous golfer, contains the following sketches lightly + and humorously written:--The Prologue--The Pilgrim at the + Shrine--Mecca out of Season--The Pilgrim at Home--The Pilgrim + Abroad--The Life of the Links--A Tragedy by the Way--Scraps from the + Scrip--The Golfer in Art--Early Pilgrims in the West--An Interesting + Relic. + + + #Educational# + + + EVAGRIUS. Edited by PROFESSOR LEON PARMENTIER of Liege and M. Bidez of + Gand. _Demy 8vo._ _7s. 6d._ _Byzantine Texts._ + + + THE ODES AND EPODES OF HORACE. Translated by A. D. GODLEY, M.A., + Fellow of Magdalen College, Oxford. _Crown 8vo. buckram._ _2s._ + + + ORNAMENTAL DESIGN FOR WOVEN FABRICS. By C. STEPHENSON, of The + Technical College, Bradford, and F. SUDDARDS, of The Yorkshire + College, Leeds. With 65 full-page plates, and numerous designs and + diagrams in the text. _Demy 8vo._ _7s. 6d._ + + The aim of this book is to supply, in a systematic and practical form, + information on the subject of Decorative Design as applied to Woven + Fabrics, and is primarily intended to meet the requirements of + students in Textile and Art Schools, or of designers actively engaged + in the weaving industry. Its wealth of illustration is a marked + feature of the book. + + + ESSENTIALS OF COMMERCIAL EDUCATION. By E. E. WHITFIELD, M.A. + _Crown 8vo._ _1s. 6d._ + + A guide to Commercial Education and Examinations. + + + PASSAGES FOR UNSEEN TRANSLATION. By E. C. MARCHANT, M.A., Fellow of + Peterhouse, Cambridge; and A. M. COOK, M.A., late Scholar of Wadham + College, Oxford: Assistant Masters at St. Paul's School. _Crown 8vo._ + _3s. 6d._ + + This book contains Two Hundred Latin and Two Hundred Greek Passages, + and has been very carefully compiled to meet the wants of V. and VI. + Form Boys at Public Schools. It is also well adapted for the use of + Honour men at the Universities. + + + EXERCISES IN LATIN ACCIDENCE. By S. E. WINBOLT, Assistant Master in + Christ's Hospital. _Crown 8vo._ _1s. 6d._ + + An elementary book adapted for Lower Forms to accompany the shorter + Latin primer. + + + NOTES ON GREEK AND LATIN SYNTAX. By G. BUCKLAND GREEN, M.A., Assistant + Master at the Edinburgh Academy, late Fellow of St. John's College, + Oxon. _Cr. 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + Notes and explanations on the chief difficulties of Greek and Latin + Syntax, with numerous passages for exercise. + + + A DIGEST OF DEDUCTIVE LOGIC. By JOHNSON BARKER, B.A. _Crown 8vo._ + _2s. 6d._ + + A short introduction to logic for students preparing for examinations. + + + TEST CARDS IN EUCLID AND ALGEBRA. By D. S. CALDERWOOD, Headmaster of + the Normal School, Edinburgh. In a Packet of 40, with Answers. _1s._ + + A set of cards for advanced pupils in elementary schools. + + + HOW TO MAKE A DRESS. By J. A. E. WOOD. Illustrated. _Crown 8vo._ + _1s. 6d._ + + A text-book for students preparing for the City and Guilds + examination, based on the syllabus. The diagrams are numerous. + + + #Fiction# + + + LOCHINVAR. By S. R. CROCKETT, Author of 'The Raiders,' etc. + Illustrated by FRANK RICHARDS. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + BYEWAYS. By ROBERT HICHENS, Author of 'Flames,' etc. _Crown 8vo._ + _6s._ + + + THE MUTABLE MANY. By ROBERT BARR, Author of 'In the Midst of Alarms,' + 'A Woman Intervenes,' etc. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + THE LADY'S WALK. By MRS. OLIPHANT. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + A new book by this lamented author, somewhat in the style of her + 'Beleagured City.' + + + TRAITS AND CONFIDENCES. By The Hon. EMILY LAWLESS, Author of + 'Hurrish,' 'Maelcho,' etc. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + BLADYS. By S. BARING GOULD, Author of 'The Broom Squire,' etc. + Illustrated by F. H. TOWNSEND. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + A Romance of the last century. + + + THE POMP OF THE LAVILETTES. By GILBERT PARKER, Author of 'The Seats of + the Mighty,' etc. _Crown 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + + A DAUGHTER OF STRIFE. By JANE HELEN FINDLATER, Author of 'The Green + Graves of Balgowrie.' _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + A story of 1710. + + + OVER THE HILLS. By MARY FINDLATER. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + A novel by a sister of J. H. Findlater, the author of 'The Green + Graves of Balgowrie.' + + + A CREEL OF IRISH STORIES. By JANE BARLOW, Author of 'Irish Idylls.' + _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + THE CLASH OF ARMS. By J. BLOUNDELLE BURTON, Author of 'In the Day of + Adversity.' _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + A PASSIONATE PILGRIM. By PERCY WHITE, Author of 'Mr. Bailey-Martin.' + _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + SECRETARY TO BAYNE, M.P. By W. PETT RIDGE. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + THE BUILDERS. By J. S. FLETCHER, Author of 'When Charles I. was King.' + _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + JOSIAH'S WIFE. By NORMA LORIMER. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + BY STROKE OF SWORD. By ANDREW BALFOUR. Illustrated by W. CUBITT COOKE. + _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + A romance of the time of Elizabeth. + + + THE SINGER OF MARLY. By I. HOOPER. Illustrated by W. CUBITT COOKE. + _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + A romance of adventure. + + + KIRKHAM'S FIND. By MARY GAUNT, Author of 'The Moving Finger.' + _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + THE FALL OF THE SPARROW. By M. C. BALFOUR. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + SCOTTISH BORDER LIFE. By JAMES C. DIBDIN. _Crown 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + + + + A LIST OF + MESSRS. METHUEN'S + PUBLICATIONS + + + #Poetry# + + + RUDYARD KIPLING'S NEW POEMS + + #Rudyard Kipling.# THE SEVEN SEAS. By RUDYARD KIPLING. _Third + Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _Buckram, gilt top._ _6s._ + + 'The new poems of Mr. Rudyard Kipling have all the spirit and swing + of their predecessors. Patriotism is the solid concrete foundation + on which Mr. Kipling has built the whole of his work.'--_Times._ + + 'Full of passionate patriotism and the Imperial spirit.'--_Yorkshire + Post._ + + 'The Empire has found a singer; it is no depreciation of the songs to + say that statesmen may have, one way or other, to take account of + them.'--_Manchester Guardian._ + + 'Animated through and through with indubitable genius.'--_Daily + Telegraph._ + + 'Packed with inspiration, with humour, with pathos.'--_Daily + Chronicle._ + + 'All the pride of empire, all the intoxication of power, all the + ardour, the energy, the masterful strength and the wonderful endurance + and death-scorning pluck which are the very bone and fibre and marrow + of the British character are here.'--_Daily Mail._ + + + #Rudyard Kipling.# BARRACK-ROOM BALLADS; And Other Verses. By RUDYARD + KIPLING. _Twelfth Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'Mr. Kipling's verse is strong, vivid, full of character.... + Unmistakable genius rings in every line.'--_Times._ + + 'The ballads teem with imagination, they palpitate with emotion. We + read them with laughter and tears; the metres throb in our pulses, the + cunningly ordered words tingle with life; and if this be not poetry, + what is?'--_Pall Mall Gazette._ + + + #"Q."# POEMS AND BALLADS. By "Q.," Author of 'Green Bays,' etc. + _Crown 8vo._ _Buckram._ _3s. 6d._ + + 'This work has just the faint, ineffable touch and glow that make + poetry. 'Q.' has the true romantic spirit.'--_Speaker._ + + + #"Q."# GREEN BAYS: Verses and Parodies. By "Q.," Author of 'Dead Man's + Rock,' etc. _Second Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + 'The verses display a rare and versatile gift of parody, great command + of metre, and a very pretty turn of humour.'--_Times._ + + + #E. Mackay.# A SONG OF THE SEA. By ERIC MACKAY, Author of 'The Love + Letters of a Violinist.' _Second Edition._ _Fcap. 8vo._ _5s._ + + 'Everywhere Mr. Mackay displays himself the master of a style marked + by all the characteristics of the best rhetoric. He has a keen sense + of rhythm and of general balance; his verse is excellently + sonorous.'--_Globe._ + + + #Ibsen.# BRAND. A Drama by HENRIK IBSEN. Translated by William Wilson. + _Second Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + 'The greatest world-poem of the nineteenth century next to "Faust." It + is in the same set with "Agamemnon," with "Lear," with the literature + that we now instinctively regard as high and holy.'--_Daily + Chronicle._ + + + #"A. G."# VERSES TO ORDER. By "A. G." _Cr. 8vo._ _2s. 6d. net._ + + A small volume of verse by a writer whose initials are well known to + Oxford men. + + 'A capital specimen of light academic poetry. These verses are very + bright and engaging, easy and sufficiently witty.'--_St. James's + Gazette._ + + + #Belles Lettres, Anthologies, etc.# + + + #R. L. Stevenson.# VAILIMA LETTERS. By ROBERT LOUIS STEVENSON. With an + Etched Portrait by WILLIAM STRANG, and other Illustrations. _Second + Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _Buckram._ _7s. 6d._ + + 'Few publications have in our time been more eagerly awaited than + these "Vailima Letters," giving the first fruits of the correspondence + of Robert Louis Stevenson. But, high as the tide of expectation has + run, no reader can possibly be disappointed in the result.'--_St. + James's Gazette._ + + + #Henley and Whibley.# A BOOK OF ENGLISH PROSE. Collected by W. E. + HENLEY and CHARLES WHIBLEY. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'A unique volume of extracts--an art gallery of early + prose.'--_Birmingham Post._ + + 'An admirable companion to Mr. Henley's "Lyra Heroica."'--_Saturday + Review._ + + 'Quite delightful. A greater treat for those not well acquainted with + pre-Restoration prose could not be imagined.'--_Athenaeum._ + + + #H. C. Beeching.# LYRA SACRA: An Anthology of Sacred Verse. Edited by + H. C. BEECHING, M.A. _Crown 8vo._ _Buckram._ _6s._ + + 'A charming selection, which maintains a lofty standard of + excellence.'--_Times._ + + + #"Q."# THE GOLDEN POMP: A Procession of English Lyrics from Surrey to + Shirley, arranged by A. T. QUILLER COUCH. _Crown 8vo._ _Buckram._ + _6s._ + + 'A delightful volume: a really golden "Pomp."'--_Spectator._ + + + #W. B. Yeats.# AN ANTHOLOGY OF IRISH VERSE. Edited by W. B. YEATS. + _Crown 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + 'An attractive and catholic selection.'--Times. + + + #G. W. Steevens.# MONOLOGUES OF THE DEAD. By G. W. STEEVENS. _Foolscap + 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + A series of Soliloquies in which famous men of antiquity--Julius + Caesar, Nero, Alcibiades, etc., attempt to express themselves in the + modes of thought and language of to-day. + + The effect is sometimes splendid, sometimes bizarre, but always + amazingly clever.--_Pall Mall Gazette._ + + + #Victor Hugo.# THE LETTERS OF VICTOR HUGO. Translated from the French + by F. CLARKE, M.A. _In Two Volumes._ _Demy 8vo._ _10s. 6d. each._ + _Vol. I._ 1815-35. + + This is the first volume of one of the most interesting and important + collection of letters ever published in France. The correspondence + dates from Victor Hugo's boyhood to his death, and none of the letters + have been published before. The arrangement is chiefly chronological, + but where there is an interesting set of letters to one person these + are arranged together. The first volume contains, among others, (1) + Letters to his father; (2) to his young wife; (3) to his confessor, + Lamennais; (4) a very important set of about fifty letters to + Sainte-Beauve; (5) letters about his early books and plays. + + 'A charming and vivid picture of a man whose egotism never marred his + natural kindness, and whose vanity did not impair his + greatness.'--_Standard._ + + + #C. H. Pearson.# ESSAYS AND CRITICAL REVIEWS. By C. H. PEARSON, M.A., + Author of 'National Life and Character.' Edited, with a Biographical + Sketch, by H. A. STRONG, M.A., LL.D. With a Portrait. _Demy 8vo._ + _10s. 6d._ + + 'Remarkable for careful handling, breadth of view, and + knowledge.'--_Scotsman._ + + 'Charming essays.'--_Spectator._ + + + #W. M. Dixon.# A PRIMER OF TENNYSON. By W. M. DIXON, M.A., Professor + of English Literature at Mason College. _Crown 8vo._ _2s. 6d._ + + 'Much sound and well-expressed criticism and acute literary judgments. + The bibliography is a boon.'--_Speaker._ + + + #W. A. Craigie.# A PRIMER OF BURNS. By W. A. CRAIGIE. _Crown 8vo._ + _2s. 6d._ + + This book is planned on a method similar to the 'Primer of Tennyson.' + It has also a glossary. + + 'A valuable addition to the literature of the poet.'--_Times._ + + 'An excellent short account.'--_Pall Mall Gazette._ + + 'An admirable introduction.'--_Globe._ + + + #Sterne.# THE LIFE AND OPINIONS OF TRISTRAM SHANDY. By LAWRENCE + STERNE. With an Introduction by CHARLES WHIBLEY, and a Portrait. + _2 vols._ _7s._ + + 'Very dainty volumes are these; the paper, type, and light-green + binding are all very agreeable to the eye. _Simplex munditiis_ is the + phrase that might be applied to them.'--_Globe._ + + + #Congreve.# THE COMEDIES OF WILLIAM CONGREVE. With an Introduction by + G. S. STREET, and a Portrait. _2 vols._ _7s._ + + 'The volumes are strongly bound in green buckram, are of a convenient + size, and pleasant to look upon, so that whether on the shelf, or on + the table, or in the hand the possessor is thoroughly content with + them.'--_Guardian._ + + + #Morier.# THE ADVENTURES OF HAJJI BABA OF ISPAHAN. By JAMES MORIER. + With an Introduction by E. G. BROWNE, M.A., and a Portrait. _2 vols._ + _7s._ + + + #Walton.# THE LIVES OF DONNE, WOTTON, HOOKER, HERBERT, AND SANDERSON. + By IZAAK WALTON. With an Introduction by VERNON BLACKBURN, and a + Portrait. _3s. 6d._ + + + #Johnson.# THE LIVES OF THE ENGLISH POETS. By SAMUEL JOHNSON, LL.D. + With an Introduction by J. H. MILLAR, and a Portrait. _3 vols._ + _10s. 6d._ + + + #Burns.# THE POEMS OF ROBERT BURNS. Edited by ANDREW LANG and W. A. + CRAIGIE. With Portrait. _Demy 8vo, gilt top._ _6s._ + + This edition contains a carefully collated Text, numerous Notes, + critical and textual, a critical and biographical Introduction, and a + Glossary. + + 'Among the editions in one volume, Mr. Andrew Lang's will take the + place of authority.'--_Times._ + + + #F. Langbridge.# BALLADS OF THE BRAVE: Poems of Chivalry, Enterprise, + Courage, and Constancy. Edited, with Notes, by Rev. F. LANGBRIDGE. + _Crown 8vo._ _Buckram._ _3s. 6d._ _School Edition._ _2s. 6d._ + + 'A very happy conception happily carried out. These "Ballads of the + Brave" are intended to suit the real tastes of boys, and will suit the + taste of the great majority.'--_Spectator._ + + 'The book is full of splendid things.'--_World._ + + + #Illustrated Books# + + + #Jane Barlow.# THE BATTLE OF THE FROGS AND MICE, translated by JANE + BARLOW, Author of 'Irish Idylls,' and pictured by F. D. BEDFORD. + _Small 4to._ _6s. net._ + + + #S. Baring Gould.# A BOOK OF FAIRY TALES retold by S. BARING GOULD. + With numerous illustrations and initial letters by ARTHUR J. GASKIN. + _Second Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _Buckram._ _6s._ + + 'Mr. Baring Gould is deserving of gratitude, in re-writing in honest, + simple style the old stories that delighted the childhood of "our + fathers and grandfathers." As to the form of the book, and the + printing, which is by Messrs. Constable, it were difficult to commend + overmuch.'--_Saturday Review._ + + + #S. Baring Gould.# OLD ENGLISH FAIRY TALES. Collected and edited by S. + BARING GOULD. With Numerous Illustrations by F. D. BEDFORD. _Second + Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _Buckram._ _6s._ + + 'A charming volume, which children will be sure to appreciate. The + stories have been selected with great ingenuity from various old + ballads and folk-tales, and, having been somewhat altered and + readjusted, now stand forth, clothed in Mr. Baring Gould's delightful + English, to enchant youthful readers.'--_Guardian._ + + + #S. Baring Gould.# A BOOK OF NURSERY SONGS AND RHYMES. Edited by S. + BARING GOULD, and Illustrated by the Birmingham Art School. _Buckram, + gilt top._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'The volume is very complete in its way, as it contains nursery songs + to the number of 77, game-rhymes, and jingles. To the student we + commend the sensible introduction, and the explanatory notes. The + volume is superbly printed on soft, thick paper, which it is a + pleasure to touch; and the borders and pictures are among the very + best specimens we have seen of the Gaskin school.'--_Birmingham + Gazette._ + + + #H. C. Beeching.# A BOOK OF CHRISTMAS VERSE. Edited by H. C. BEECHING, + M.A., and Illustrated by WALTER CRANE. _Crown 8vo, gilt top._ _5s._ + + A collection of the best verse inspired by the birth of Christ from + the Middle Ages to the present day. A distinction of the book is the + large number of poems it contains by modern authors, a few of which + are here printed for the first time. + + 'An anthology which, from its unity of aim and high poetic excellence, + has a better right to exist than most of its fellows.'--_Guardian._ + + + #History# + + + #Gibbon.# THE DECLINE AND FALL OF THE ROMAN EMPIRE. By EDWARD GIBBON. + A New Edition, Edited with Notes, Appendices, and Maps, by J. B. BURY, + M.A., Fellow of Trinity College, Dublin. _In Seven Volumes._ _Demy 8vo._ + _Gilt top._ _8s. 6d. each._ _Also crown 8vo._ _6s. each._ + _Vols. I., II., and III._ + + 'The time has certainly arrived for a new edition of Gibbon's great + work.... Professor Bury is the right man to undertake this task. His + learning is amazing, both in extent and accuracy. The book is issued + in a handy form, and at a moderate price, and it is admirably + printed.'--_Times._ + + 'The edition is edited as a classic should be edited, removing + nothing, yet indicating the value of the text, and bringing it up to + date. It promises to be of the utmost value, and will be a welcome + addition to many libraries.'--_Scotsman._ + + 'This edition, so far as one may judge from the first instalment, is a + marvel of erudition and critical skill, and it is the very minimum of + praise to predict that the seven volumes of it will supersede Dean + Milman's as the standard edition of our great historical + classic.'--_Glasgow Herald._ + + 'The beau-ideal Gibbon has arrived at last.'--_Sketch._ + + 'At last there is an adequate modern edition of Gibbon.... The best + edition the nineteenth century could produce.'--_Manchester Guardian._ + + + #Flinders Petrie.# A HISTORY OF EGYPT, FROM THE EARLIEST TIMES TO THE + PRESENT DAY. Edited by W. M. FLINDERS PETRIE, D.C.L., LL.D., Professor + of Egyptology at University College. _Fully Illustrated._ _In Six + Volumes._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s. each._ + + Vol. I. PREHISTORIC TIMES TO XVI. DYNASTY. W. M. F. Petrie. _Third + Edition._ + + Vol. II. THE XVIITH AND XVIIITH DYNASTIES. W. M. F. Petrie. _Second + Edition._ + + 'A history written in the spirit of scientific precision so worthily + represented by Dr. Petrie and his school cannot but promote sound and + accurate study, and supply a vacant place in the English literature of + Egyptology.'--_Times._ + + + #Flinders Petrie.# EGYPTIAN TALES. Edited by W. M. FLINDERS PETRIE. + Illustrated by TRISTRAM ELLIS. _In Two Volumes._ _Crown 8vo._ + _3s. 6d. each._ + + 'A valuable addition to the literature of comparative folk-lore. The + drawings are really illustrations in the literal sense of the + word.'--_Globe._ + + 'It has a scientific value to the student of history and + archaeology.'--_Scotsman._ + + 'Invaluable as a picture of life in Palestine and Egypt.'--_Daily + News._ + + + #Flinders Petrie.# EGYPTIAN DECORATIVE ART. By W. M. FLINDERS PETRIE, + D.C.L. With 120 Illustrations. _Crown 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + 'Professor Flinders Petrie is not only a profound Egyptologist, but an + accomplished student of comparative archaeology. In these lectures, + delivered at the Royal Institution, he displays both qualifications + with rare skill in elucidating the development of decorative art in + Egypt, and in tracing its influence on the art of other + countries.'--_Times._ + + + #S. Baring Gould.# THE TRAGEDY OF THE CAESARS. The Emperors of the + Julian and Claudian Lines. With numerous Illustrations from Busts, + Gems, Cameos, etc. By S. BARING GOULD, Author of 'Mehalah,' etc. + _Fourth Edition._ _Royal 8vo._ _15s._ + + 'A most splendid and fascinating book on a subject of undying + interest. The great feature of the book is the use the author has made + of the existing portraits of the Caesars, and the admirable critical + subtlety he has exhibited in dealing with this line of research. It is + brilliantly written, and the illustrations are supplied on a scale of + profuse magnificence.'--_Daily Chronicle._ + + 'The volumes will in no sense disappoint the general reader. Indeed, + in their way, there is nothing in any sense so good in English.... Mr. + Baring Gould has presented his narrative in such a way as not to make + one dull page.'--_Athenaeum._ + + + #H. de B. Gibbons.# INDUSTRY IN ENGLAND: HISTORICAL OUTLINES. By H. DE + B. GIBBINS, M.A., D.Litt. With 5 Maps. _Second Edition._ _Demy 8vo._ + _10s. 6d._ + + This book is written with the view of affording a clear view of the + main facts of English Social and Industrial History placed in due + perspective. Beginning with prehistoric times, it passes in review the + growth and advance of industry up to the nineteenth century, showing + its gradual development and progress. The book is illustrated by Maps, + Diagrams, and Tables. + + + #A. Clark.# THE COLLEGES OF OXFORD: Their History and their + Traditions. By Members of the University. Edited by A. CLARK, M.A., + Fellow and Tutor of Lincoln College. _8vo._ _12s. 6d._ + + 'A work which will certainly be appealed to for many years as the + standard book on the Colleges of Oxford.'--_Athenaeum._ + + + #Perrens.# THE HISTORY OF FLORENCE FROM 1434 TO 1492. By F. T. + PERRENS. Translated by HANNAH LYNCH. _8vo._ _12s. 6d._ + + A history of Florence under the domination of Cosimo, Piero, and + Lorenzo de Medicis. + + 'This is a standard book by an honest and intelligent historian, who + has deserved well of all who are interested in Italian + history.'--_Manchester Guardian._ + + + #J. Wells.# A SHORT HISTORY OF ROME. By $1, Fellow and Tutor of Wadham + Coll., Oxford. With 4 Maps. _Crown 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + This book is intended for the Middle and Upper Forms of Public Schools + and for Pass Students at the Universities. It contains copious Tables, + etc. + + 'An original work written on an original plan, and with uncommon + freshness and vigour.'--_Speaker._ + + + #E. L. S. Horsburgh.# THE CAMPAIGN OF WATERLOO. By E. L. S. HORSBURGH, + B.A. _With Plans._ _Crown 8vo._ _5s._ + + 'A brilliant essay--simple, sound, and thorough.'--_Daily Chronicle._ + + 'A study, the most concise, the most lucid, the most critical that has + been produced.'--_Birmingham Mercury._ + + + #H. B. George.# BATTLES OF ENGLISH HISTORY. By H. B. GEORGE, M.A., + Fellow of New College, Oxford. _With numerous Plans._ _Third Edition._ + _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'Mr. George has undertaken a very useful task--that of making military + affairs intelligible and instructive to non-military readers--and has + executed it with laudable intelligence and industry, and with a large + measure of success.'--_Times._ + + + #O. Browning.# A SHORT HISTORY OF MEDIAEVAL ITALY, A.D. 1250-1530. By + OSCAR BROWNING, Fellow and Tutor of King's College, Cambridge. _Second + Edition._ _In Two Volumes._ _Crown 8vo._ _5s. each._ + + Vol. I. 1250-1409.--Guelphs and Ghibellines. Vol. II. 1409-1530.--The + Age of the Condottieri. + + 'A vivid picture of mediaeval Italy.'--_Standard._ + + 'Mr. Browning is to be congratulated on the production of a work of + immense labour and learning.'--_Westminster Gazette._ + + + #O'Grady.# THE STORY OF IRELAND. By STANDISH O'GRADY, Author of 'Finn + and his Companions.' _Cr. 8vo._ _2s. 6d._ + + 'Most delightful, most stimulating. Its racy humour, its original + imaginings, make it one of the freshest, breeziest + volumes.'--_Methodist Times._ + + + #Biography# + + + #S. Baring Gould.# THE LIFE OF NAPOLEON BONAPARTE. By S. BARING GOULD. + With over 450 Illustrations in the Text and 12 Photogravure Plates. + _Large quarto._ _Gilt top._ _36s._ + + 'The best biography of Napoleon in our tongue, nor have the French as + good a biographer of their hero. A book very nearly as good as + Southey's "Life of Nelson."'--_Manchester Guardian._ + + 'The main feature of this gorgeous volume is its great wealth of + beautiful photogravures and finely-executed wood engravings, + constituting a complete pictorial chronicle of Napoleon I.'s personal + history from the days of his early childhood at Ajaccio to the date of + his second interment under the dome of the Invalides in + Paris.'--_Daily Telegraph._ + + 'The most elaborate account of Napoleon ever produced by an English + writer.'--_Daily Chronicle._ + + 'A brilliant and attractive volume. Never before have so many pictures + relating to Napoleon been brought within the limits of an English + book.'--_Globe._ + + 'Particular notice is due to the vast collection of contemporary + illustrations.'--_Guardian._ + + 'Nearly all the illustrations are real contributions to + history.'--_Westminster Gazette._ + + 'The illustrations are of supreme interest.'--_Standard._ + + + #Morris Fuller.# THE LIFE AND WRITINGS OF JOHN DAVENANT, D.D. + (1571-1641), President of Queen's College, Lady Margaret Professor of + Divinity, Bishop of Salisbury. By MORRIS FULLER, B.D. _Demy 8vo._ + _10s. 6d._ + + 'A valuable contribution to ecclesiastical history.'--_Birmingham + Gazette._ + + + #J. M. Rigg.# ST. ANSELM OF CANTERBURY: A CHAPTER IN THE HISTORY OF + RELIGION. By J. M. RIGG. _Demy 8vo._ _7s. 6d._ + + 'Mr. Rigg has told the story of the great Primate's life with + scholarly ability, and has thereby contributed an interesting chapter + to the history of the Norman period.'--_Daily Chronicle._ + + + #F. W. Joyce.# THE LIFE OF SIR FREDERICK GORE OUSELEY. By F. W. JOYCE, + M.A. With Portraits and Illustrations. _Crown 8vo._ _7s. 6d._ + + 'This book has been undertaken in quite the right spirit, and written + with sympathy, insight, and considerable literary skill.'--_Times._ + + + #W. G. Collingwood.# THE LIFE OF JOHN RUSKIN. By W. G. COLLINGWOOD, + M.A., Editor of Mr. Ruskin's Poems. With numerous Portraits, and 13 + Drawings by Mr. Ruskin. _Second Edition._ _2 vols._ _8vo._ _32s._ + + 'No more magnificent volumes have been published for a long + time.'--_Times._ + + 'It is long since we had a biography with such delights of substance + and of form. Such a book is a pleasure for the day, and a joy for + ever.'--_Daily Chronicle._ + + + #C. Waldstein.# JOHN RUSKIN: a Study. By CHARLES WALDSTEIN, M.A., + Fellow of King's College, Cambridge. With a Photogravure Portrait + after Professor Herkomer. _Post 8vo._ _5s._ + + 'A thoughtful, impartial, well-written criticism of Ruskin's teaching, + intended to separate what the author regards as valuable and permanent + from what is transient and erroneous in the great master's + writing.'--_Daily Chronicle._ + + + #W. H. Hutton.# THE LIFE OF SIR THOMAS MORE. By W. H. HUTTON, M.A., + Author of 'William Laud.' _With Portraits._ _Crown 8vo._ _5s._ + + 'The book lays good claim to high rank among our biographies. It is + excellently, even lovingly, written.'--_Scotsman._ + + 'An excellent monograph.'--_Times._ + + + #Clark Russell.# THE LIFE OF ADMIRAL LORD COLLINGWOOD. By W. CLARK + RUSSELL, Author of 'The Wreck of the Grosvenor.' With Illustrations by + F. BRANGWYN. _Third Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'A book which we should like to see in the hands of every boy in the + country.'--_St. James's Gazette._ + + 'A really good book.'--_Saturday Review._ + + + #Southey.# ENGLISH SEAMEN (Howard, Clifford, Hawkins, Drake, + Cavendish). By ROBERT SOUTHEY. Edited, with an Introduction, by DAVID + HANNAY. _Second Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'Admirable and well-told stories of our naval history.'--_Army and + Navy Gazette._ + + 'A brave, inspiriting book.'--_Black and White._ + + + #Travel, Adventure and Topography# + + + #R. S. S. Baden-Powell.# THE DOWNFALL OF PREMPEH. A Diary of Life with + the Native Levy in Ashanti, 1895. By Colonel BADEN-POWELL. With 21 + Illustrations and a Map. _Demy 8vo._ _10s. 6d._ + + 'A compact, faithful, most readable record of the campaign.'--_Daily + News._ + + 'A bluff and vigorous narrative.'--_Glasgow Herald._ + + + #R. S. S. Baden-Powell.# THE MATEBELE CAMPAIGN 1896. By Colonel R. S. + S. BADEN-POWELL. With nearly 100 Illustrations. _Second Edition._ + _Demy 8vo._ _15s._ + + 'Written in an unaffectedly light and humorous style.'--_The World._ + + 'A very racy and eminently readable book.'--_St. James's Gazette._ + + 'As a straightforward account of a great deal of plucky work + unpretentiously done, this book is well worth reading. The simplicity + of the narrative is all in its favour, and accords in a peculiarly + English fashion with the nature of the subject.'--_Times._ + + + #Captain Hinde.# THE FALL OF THE CONGO ARABS. By SIDNEY L. HINDE. With + Portraits and Plans. _Demy 8vo._ _12s. 6d._ + + 'The book is full of good things, and of sustained interest.'--_St. + James's Gazette._ + + 'A graphic sketch of one of the most exciting and important episodes + in the struggle for supremacy in Central Africa between the Arabs and + their Europeon rivals. Apart from the story of the campaign, Captain + Hinde's book is mainly remarkable for the fulness with which he + discusses the question of cannibalism. It is, indeed, the only + connected narrative--in English, at any rate--which has been published + of this particular episode in African history.'--_Times._ + + 'Captain Hinde's book is one of the most interesting and valuable + contributions yet made to the literature of modern Africa.'--_Daily + News._ + + + #W. Crooke.# THE NORTH-WESTERN PROVINCES OF INDIA: THEIR ETHNOLOGY AND + ADMINISTRATION. By W. CROOKE. With Maps and Illustrations. _Demy 8vo._ + _10s. 6d._ + + 'A carefully and well-written account of one of the most important + provinces of the Empire. In seven chapters Mr. Crooke deals + successively with the land in its physical aspect, the province under + Hindoo and Mussulman rule, the province under British rule, the + ethnology and sociology of the province, the religious and social life + of the people, the land and its settlement, and the native peasant in + his relation to the land. The illustrations are good and well + selected, and the map is excellent.'--_Manchester Guardian._ + + + #W. B. Worsfold.# SOUTH AFRICA: Its History and its Future. By W. + BASIL WORSFOLD, M.A. _With a Map._ _Second Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ + _6s._ + + 'An intensely interesting book.'--_Daily Chronicle._ + + 'A monumental work compressed into a very moderate compass.'--_World._ + + + #General Literature# + + + #S. Baring Gould.# OLD COUNTRY LIFE. By S. BARING GOULD, Author of + 'Mehalah,' etc. With Sixty-seven Illustrations by W. PARKINSON, F. D. + BEDFORD, and F. MASEY. _Large Crown 8vo._ _10s. 6d._ _Fifth and + Cheaper Edition._ _6s._ + + '"Old Country Life," as healthy wholesome reading, full of breezy life + and movement, full of quaint stories vigorously told, will not be + excelled by any book to be published throughout the year. Sound, + hearty, and English to the core.'--_World._ + + + #S. Baring Gould.# HISTORIC ODDITIES AND STRANGE EVENTS. By S. BARING + GOULD. _Third Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'A collection of exciting and entertaining chapters. The whole volume + is delightful reading.'--_Times._ + + + #S. Baring Gould.# FREAKS OF FANATICISM. By S. BARING GOULD. _Third + Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'Mr. Baring Gould has a keen eye for colour and effect, and the + subjects he has chosen give ample scope to his descriptive and + analytic faculties. A perfectly fascinating book.'--_Scottish Leader._ + + + #S. Baring Gould.# A GARLAND OF COUNTRY SONG: English Folk Songs with + their Traditional Melodies. Collected and arranged by S. BARING GOULD + and H. FLEETWOOD SHEPPARD. _Demy 4to._ _6s._ + + + #S. Baring Gould.# SONGS OF THE WEST: Traditional Ballads and Songs of + the West of England, with their Traditional Melodies. Collected by S. + BARING GOULD, M.A., and H. FLEETWOOD SHEPPARD, M.A. Arranged for Voice + and Piano. In 4 Parts (containing 25 Songs each), _Parts I., II., III.,_ + _3s. each._ _Part IV.,_ _5s._ _In one Vol.,_ _French morocco,_ + _15s._ + + 'A rich collection of humour, pathos, grace, and poetic + fancy.'--_Saturday Review._ + + + #S. Baring Gould.# YORKSHIRE ODDITIES AND STRANGE EVENTS. _Fourth + Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + #S. Baring Gould.# STRANGE SURVIVALS AND SUPERSTITIONS. With + Illustrations. By S. BARING GOULD. _Crown 8vo._ _Second Edition._ + _6s._ + + 'We have read Mr. Baring Gould's book from beginning to end. It is + full of quaint and various information, and there is not a dull page + in it.'--_Notes and Queries._ + + + #S. Baring Gould.# THE DESERTS OF SOUTHERN FRANCE. By S. BARING GOULD. + With numerous Illustrations by F. D. BEDFORD, S. HUTTON, etc. + _2 vols._ _Demy 8vo._ _32s._ + + 'His two richly-illustrated volumes are full of matter of interest + to the geologist, the archaeologist, and the student of history and + manners.'--_Scotsman._ + + + #G. W. Steevens.# NAVAL POLICY: WITH A DESCRIPTION OF ENGLISH AND + FOREIGN NAVIES. By G. W. STEEVENS. _Demy 8vo._ _6s._ + + This book is a description of the British and other more important + navies of the world, with a sketch of the lines on which our naval + policy might possibly be developed. It describes our recent naval + policy, and shows what our naval force really is. A detailed but + non-technical account is given of the instruments of modern + warfare--guns, armour, engines, and the like--with a view to determine + how far we are abreast of modern invention and modern requirements. An + ideal policy is then sketched for the building and manning of our + fleet; and the last chapter is devoted to docks, coaling-stations, and + especially colonial defence. + + 'An extremely able and interesting work.'--_Daily Chronicle._ + + + #W. E. Gladstone.# THE SPEECHES AND PUBLIC ADDRESSES OF THE RT. HON. + W. E. GLADSTONE, M.P. Edited by A. W. HUTTON, M.A., and H. J. COHEN, + M.A. With Portraits. _8vo._ _Vols. IX. and X._ _12s. 6d. each._ + + + #J. Wells.# OXFORD AND OXFORD LIFE. By Members of the University. + Edited by J. WELLS, M.A., Fellow and Tutor of Wadham College. + _Crown 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + 'We congratulate Mr. Wells on the production of a readable and + intelligent account of Oxford as it is at the present time, written by + persons who are possessed of a close acquaintance with the system and + life of the University.'--_Athenaeum._ + + + #L. Whibley.# GREEK OLIGARCHIES: THEIR ORGANISATION AND CHARACTER. By + L. WHIBLEY, M.A., Fellow of Pembroke College, Cambridge. _Crown 8vo._ + _6s._ + + 'An exceedingly useful handbook: a careful and well-arranged study of + an obscure subject.'--_Times._ + + 'Mr. Whibley is never tedious or pedantic.'--_Pall Mall Gazette._ + + + #L. L. Price.# ECONOMIC SCIENCE AND PRACTICE. By L. L. PRICE, M.A., + Fellow of Oriel College, Oxford. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'The book is well written, giving evidence of considerable literary + ability, and clear mental grasp of the subject under + consideration.'--_Western Morning News._ + + + #C. F. Andrews.# CHRISTIANITY AND THE LABOUR QUESTION. By C. F. + ANDREWS, B.A. _Crown 8vo._ _2s. 6d._ + + 'A bold and scholarly survey.'--_Speaker._ + + + #J. S. Shedlock.# THE PIANOFORTE SONATA: Its Origin and Development. + By J. S. SHEDLOCK. _Crown 8vo._ _5s._ + + 'This work should be in the possession of every musician and amateur, + for it not only embodies a concise and lucid history of the origin of + one of the most important forms of musical composition, but, by reason + of the painstaking research and accuracy of the author's statements, + it is a very valuable work for reference.'--_Athenaeum._ + + + #E. M. Bowden.# THE EXAMPLE OF BUDDHA: Being Quotations from Buddhist + Literature for each Day in the Year. Compiled by E. M. BOWDEN. With + Preface by Sir EDWIN ARNOLD. _Third Edition._ _16mo._ _2s. 6d._ + + + #Science# + + + #Freudenreich.# DAIRY BACTERIOLOGY. A Short Manual for the Use of + Students. By Dr. ED. VON FREUDENREICH. Translated from the German by + J. R. AINSWORTH DAVIS, B.A., F.C.P. _Crown 8vo._ _2s. 6d._ + + + #Chalmers Mitchell.# OUTLINES OF BIOLOGY. By P. CHALMERS MITCHELL, + M.A., F.Z.S. _Fully Illustrated._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + A text-book designed to cover the new Schedule issued by the Royal + College of Physicians and Surgeons. + + + #G. Massee.# A MONOGRAPH OF THE MYXOGASTRES. By GEORGE MASSEE. With 12 + Coloured Plates. _Royal 8vo._ _18s. net._ + + 'A work much in advance of any book in the language treating of this + group of organisms. It is indispensable to every student of the + Myxogastres. The coloured plates deserve high praise for their + accuracy and execution.'--_Nature._ + + + #Philosophy# + + + #L. T. Hobhouse.# THE THEORY OF KNOWLEDGE. By L. T. HOBHOUSE, Fellow + and Tutor of Corpus College, Oxford. _Demy 8vo._ _21s._ + + 'The most important contribution to English philosophy since the + publication of Mr. Bradley's "Appearance and Reality." Full of + brilliant criticism and of positive theories which are models of + lucid statement.'--_Glasgow Herald._ + + 'An elaborate and often brilliantly written volume. The treatment + is one of great freshness, and the illustrations are particularly + numerous and apt.'--_Times._ + + + #W. H. Fairbrother.# THE PHILOSOPHY OF T. H. GREEN. By W. H. + FAIRBROTHER, M.A., Lecturer at Lincoln College, Oxford. _Crown 8vo._ + _3s. 6d._ + + This volume is expository, not critical, and is intended for senior + students at the Universities and others, as a statement of Green's + teaching, and an introduction to the study of Idealist Philosophy. + + 'In every way an admirable book. As an introduction to the writings of + perhaps the most remarkable speculative thinker whom England has + produced in the present century, nothing could be better.'--_Glasgow + Herald._ + + + #F. W. Bussell.# THE SCHOOL OF PLATO: its Origin and its Revival under + the Roman Empire. By F. W. BUSSELL, M.A., Fellow and Tutor of + Brasenose College, Oxford. _Demy 8vo._ _10s. 6d._ + + 'A highly valuable contribution to the history of ancient + thought.'--_Glasgow Herald._ + + 'A clever and stimulating book, provocative of thought and deserving + careful reading.'--_Manchester Guardian._ + + + #F. S. Granger.# THE WORSHIP OF THE ROMANS. By F. S. GRANGER, M.A., + Litt.D., Professor of Philosophy at University College, Nottingham. + _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'A scholarly analysis of the religious ceremonies, beliefs, and + superstitions of ancient Rome, conducted in the new instructive light + of comparative anthropology.'--_Times._ + + + #Theology# + + + #E. C. S. Gibson.# THE XXXIX. ARTICLES OF THE CHURCH OF ENGLAND. + Edited with an Introduction by E. C. S. GIBSON, D.D., Vicar of Leeds, + late Principal of Wells Theological College. _In Two Volumes._ + _Demy 8vo._ _15s._ + + 'The tone maintained throughout is not that of the partial advocate, + but the faithful exponent'--_Scotsman._ + + 'There are ample proofs of clearness of expression, sobriety of + judgment, and breadth of view.... The book will be welcome to all + students of the subject, and its sound, definite, and loyal theology + ought to be of great service.'--_National Observer._ + + 'So far from repelling the general reader, its orderly arrangement, + lucid treatment, and felicity of diction invite and encourage his + attention.'--_Yorkshire Post._ + + + #R. L. Ottley.# THE DOCTRINE OF THE INCARNATION. By R. L. OTTLEY, + M.A., late fellow of Magdalen College, Oxon., Principal of Pusey + House. _In Two Volumes._ _Demy 8vo._ _15s._ + + 'Learned and reverent: lucid and well arranged.'--_Record._ + + 'Accurate, well ordered, and judicious.'--_National Observer._ + + 'A clear and remarkably full account of the main currents of + speculation. Scholarly precision ... genuine tolerance ... intense + interest in his subject--are Mr. Ottley's merits.'--_Guardian._ + + + #F. B. Jevons.# AN INTRODUCTION TO THE HISTORY OF RELIGION. By F. B. + JEVONS, M.A., Litt.D., Principal of Bishop Hatfield's Hall. + _Demy 8vo._ _10s. 6d._ + + Mr. F. B. Jevons' 'Introduction to the History of Religion' treats of + early religion, from the point of view of Anthropology and Folk-lore; + and is the first attempt that has been made in any language to weave + together the results of recent investigations into such topics as + Sympathetic Magic, Taboo, Totemism, Fetishism, etc., so as to present + a systematic account of the growth of primitive religion and the + development of early religious institutions. + + 'Dr. Jevons has written a notable work, and we can strongly recommend + it to the serious attention of theologians, anthropologists, and + classical scholars.'--_Manchester Guardian._ + + 'The merit of this book lies in the penetration, the singular + acuteness and force of the author's judgment. He is at once critical + and luminous, at once just and suggestive. It is but rarely that one + meets with a book so comprehensive and so thorough as this, and it is + more than an ordinary pleasure for the reviewer to welcome and + recommend it. Dr. Jevons is something more than an historian of + primitive belief--he is a philosophic thinker, who sees his subject + clearly and sees it whole, whose mastery of detail is no less complete + than his view of the broader aspects and issues of his subject is + convincing.'--_Birmingham Post._ + + + #S. R. Driver.# SERMONS ON SUBJECTS CONNECTED WITH THE OLD TESTAMENT. + By S. R. DRIVER, D.D., Canon of Christ Church, Regius Professor of + Hebrew in the University of Oxford. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'A welcome companion to the author's famous 'Introduction.' No man can + read these discourses without feeling that Dr. Driver is fully alive + to the deeper teaching of the Old Testament.'--_Guardian._ + + + #T. K. Cheyne.# FOUNDERS OF OLD TESTAMENT CRITICISM: Biographical, + Descriptive, and Critical Studies. By T. K. CHEYNE, D.D., Oriel + Professor of the Interpretation of Holy Scripture at Oxford. _Large + crown 8vo._ _7s. 6d._ + + This book is a historical sketch of O. T. Criticism in the form of + biographical studies from the days of Eichhorn to those of Driver and + Robertson Smith. + + 'A very learned and instructive work.'--_Times._ + + + #C. H. Prior.# CAMBRIDGE SERMONS. Edited by C. H. PRIOR, M.A., Fellow + and Tutor of Pembroke College. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + A volume of sermons preached before the University of Cambridge by + various preachers, including the Archbishop of Canterbury and Bishop + Westcott. + + 'A representative collection. Bishop Westcott's is a noble + sermon.'--_Guardian._ + + + #E. B. Layard.# RELIGION IN BOYHOOD. Notes on the Religious Training + of Boys. With a Preface by J. R. ILLINGWORTH. By E. B. LAYARD, M.A. + _18mo._ _1s._ + + + #W. Yorke Faussett.# THE _DE CATECHIZANDIS RUDIBUS_ OF ST. AUGUSTINE. + Edited, with Introduction, Notes, etc., by W. YORKE FAUSSETT, M.A., + late Scholar of Balliol Coll. _Crown 8vo._ _3s. 6d._ + + An edition of a Treatise on the Essentials of Christian Doctrine, and + the best methods of impressing them on candidates for baptism. + + 'Ably and judiciously edited on the same principle as the ordinary + Greek and Latin texts.'--_Glasgow Herald._ + + + _Devotional Books_ + + _With Full-page Illustrations._ _Fcap. 8vo._ _Buckram._ _3s. 6d._ + _Padded morocco, 5s._ + + + THE IMITATION OF CHRIST. By THOMAS A KEMPIS. With an Introduction by + DEAN FARRAR. Illustrated by C. M. GERE, and printed in black and red. + _Second Edition._ + + 'Amongst all the innumerable English editions of the "Imitation," + there can have been few which were prettier than this one, printed in + strong and handsome type, with all the glory of red + initials.'--_Glasgow Herald._ + + + THE CHRISTIAN YEAR. By JOHN KEBLE. With an Introduction and Notes by + W. LOCK, D.D., Warden of Keble College, Ireland, Professor at Oxford. + Illustrated by R. ANNING BELL. + + 'The present edition is annotated with all the care and insight to be + expected from Mr. Lock. The progress and circumstances of its + composition are detailed in the Introduction. There is an interesting + Appendix on the MSS. of the "Christian Year," and another giving the + order in which the poems were written. A "Short Analysis of the + Thought" is prefixed to each, and any difficulty in the text is + explained in a note.'--_Guardian._ + + 'The most acceptable edition of this ever-popular work.'--_Globe._ + + + #Leaders of Religion# + + + Edited by H. C. BEECHING, M.A. _With Portraits, crown 8vo._ + + A series of short biographies of the most prominent leaders of + religious life and thought of all ages and countries. 3/6 + + The following are ready-- + + CARDINAL NEWMAN. By R. H. HUTTON. + JOHN WESLEY. By J. H. OVERTON, M.A. + BISHOP WILBERFORCE. By G. W. DANIEL, M.A. + CARDINAL MANNING. By A. W. HUTTON, M.A. + CHARLES SIMEON. By H. C. G. MOULE, M.A. + JOHN KEBLE. By WALTER LOCK, D.D. + THOMAS CHALMERS. By Mrs. OLIPHANT. + LANCELOT ANDREWES. By R. L. OTTLEY, M.A. + AUGUSTINE OF CANTERBURY. By E. L. CUTTS, D.D. + WILLIAM LAUD. By W. H. HUTTON, B.D. + JOHN KNOX. By F. M'CUNN. + JOHN HOWE. By R. F. HORTON, D.D. + BISHOP KEN. By F. A. CLARKE, M.A. + GEORGE FOX, THE QUAKER. By T. HODGKIN, D.C.L. + + Other volumes will be announced in due course. + + + #Fiction# + + SIX SHILLING NOVELS + Marie Corelli's Novels + _Crown 8vo._ _6s. each._ + + A ROMANCE OF TWO WORLDS. _Sixteenth Edition._ + VENDETTA. _Thirteenth Edition._ + THELMA. _Seventeenth Edition._ + ARDATH. _Eleventh Edition._ + THE SOUL OF LILITH. _Ninth Edition._ + WORMWOOD. _Eighth Edition._ + BARABBAS: A DREAM OF THE WORLD'S TRAGEDY. _Thirty-first Edition._ + + 'The tender reverence of the treatment and the imaginative beauty of + the writing have reconciled us to the daring of the conception, and + the conviction is forced on us that even so exalted a subject cannot + be made too familiar to us, provided it be presented in the true + spirit of Christian faith. The amplifications of the Scripture + narrative are often conceived with high poetic insight, and this + "Dream of the World's Tragedy" is, despite some trifling + incongruities, a lofty and not inadequate paraphrase of the supreme + climax of the inspired narrative.'--_Dublin Review._ + + + THE SORROWS OF SATAN. _Thirty-sixth Edition._ + + 'A very powerful piece of work.... The conception is magnificent, and + is likely to win an abiding place within the memory of man.... The + author has immense command of language, and a limitless audacity.... + This interesting and remarkable romance will live long after much of + the ephemeral literature of the day is forgotten.... A literary + phenomenon ... novel, and even sublime.'--W. T. STEAD in the _Review + of Reviews._ + + + Anthony Hope's Novels + + _Crown 8vo._ _6s. each._ + + + THE GOD IN THE CAR. _Seventh Edition._ + + 'A very remarkable book, deserving of critical analysis impossible + within our limit; brilliant, but not superficial; well considered, but + not elaborated; constructed with the proverbial art that conceals, but + yet allows itself to be enjoyed by readers to whom fine literary + method is a keen pleasure.'--_The World._ + + + A CHANGE OF AIR. _Fourth Edition._ + + 'A graceful, vivacious comedy, true to human nature. The characters + are traced with a masterly hand.'--_Times._ + + + A MAN OF MARK. _Fourth Edition._ + + 'Of all Mr. Hope's books, "A Man of Mark" is the one which best + compares with "The Prisoner of Zenda."'--_National Observer._ + + + THE CHRONICLES OF COUNT ANTONIO. _Third Edition._ + + 'It is a perfectly enchanting story of love and chivalry, and pure + romance. The outlawed Count is the most constant, desperate, and + withal modest and tender of lovers, a peerless gentleman, an intrepid + fighter, a very faithful friend, and a most magnanimous + foe.'--_Guardian._ + + + PHROSO. Illustrated by H. R. MILLAR. _Third Edition._ + + 'The tale is thoroughly fresh, quick with vitality, stirring the + blood, and humorously, dashingly told.'--_St. James's Gazette._ + + 'A story of adventure, every page of which is palpitating with action + and excitement.'--_Speaker._ + + 'From cover to cover "Phroso" not only engages the attention, but + carries the reader in little whirls of delight from adventure to + adventure.'--_Academy._ + + + S. Baring Gould's Novels + + _Crown 8vo._ _6s. each._ + + 'To say that a book is by the author of "Mehalah" is to imply that + it contains a story cast on strong lines, containing dramatic + possibilities, vivid and sympathetic descriptions of Nature, and a + wealth of ingenious imagery.'--_Speaker._ + + 'That whatever Mr. Baring Gould writes is well worth reading, is a + conclusion that may be very generally accepted. His views of life are + fresh and vigorous, his language pointed and characteristic, the + incidents of which he makes use are striking and original, his + characters are life-like, and though somewhat exceptional people, are + drawn and coloured with artistic force. Add to this that his + descriptions of scenes and scenery are painted with the loving eyes + and skilled hands of a master of his art, that he is always fresh and + never dull, and under such conditions it is no wonder that readers + have gained confidence both in his power of amusing and satisfying + them, and that year by year his popularity widens.'--_Court Circular._ + + + ARMINELL: A Social Romance. _Fourth Edition._ + + + URITH: A Story of Dartmoor. _Fifth Edition._ + + 'The author is at his best.'--_Times._ + + + IN THE ROAR OF THE SEA. _Sixth Edition._ + + 'One of the best imagined and most enthralling stories the author has + produced.'--_Saturday Review._ + + + MRS. CURGENVEN OF CURGENVEN. _Fourth Edition._ + + 'The swing of the narrative is splendid.'--_Sussex Daily News._ + + + CHEAP JACK ZITA. _Fourth Edition._ + + 'A powerful drama of human passion.'--_Westminster Gazette._ + + 'A story worthy the author.'--_National Observer._ + + + THE QUEEN OF LOVE. _Fourth Edition._ + + 'You cannot put it down until you have finished it.'--_Punch._ + + 'Can be heartily recommended to all who care for cleanly, energetic, + and interesting fiction.'--_Sussex Daily News._ + + + KITTY ALONE. _Fourth Edition._ + + 'A strong and original story, teeming with graphic description, + stirring incident, and, above all, with vivid and enthralling human + interest.'--_Daily Telegraph._ + + + NOEMI: A Romance of the Cave-Dwellers. Illustrated by R. CATON + WOODVILLE. _Third Edition._ + + '"Noemi" is as excellent a tale of fighting and adventure as one may + wish to meet. The narrative also runs clear and sharp as the Loire + itself.'--_Pall Mall Gazette._ + + 'Mr. Baring Gould's powerful story is full of the strong lights and + shadows and vivid colouring to which he has accustomed + us.'--_Standard._ + + + THE BROOM-SQUIRE. Illustrated by FRANK DADD. _Fourth Edition._ + + 'A strain of tenderness is woven through the web of his tragic tale, + and its atmosphere is sweetened by the nobility and sweetness of the + heroine's character.'--_Daily News._ + + 'A story of exceptional interest that seems to us to be better than + anything he has written of late.'--_Speaker._ + + + THE PENNYCOMEQUICKS. _Third Edition._ + + + DARTMOOR IDYLLS. + + 'A book to read, and keep and read again; for the genuine fun and + pathos of it will not early lose their effect.'--_Vanity Fair._ + + + GUAVAS THE TINNER. Illustrated by FRANK DADD. _Second Edition._ + + 'Mr. Baring Gould is a wizard who transports us into a region of + visions, often lurid and disquieting, but always full of interest and + enchantment.'--_Spectator._ + + 'In the weirdness of the story, in the faithfulness with which the + characters are depicted, and in force of style, it closely resembles + "Mehalah."'--_Daily Telegraph._ + + 'There is a kind of flavour about this book which alone elevates it + above the ordinary novel. The story itself has a grandeur in harmony + with the wild and rugged scenery which is its setting.'--_Athenaeum._ + + + Gilbert Parker's Novels + + _Crown 8vo._ _6s. each._ + + + PIERRE AND HIS PEOPLE. _Fourth Edition._ + + 'Stories happily conceived and finely executed. There is strength and + genius in Mr. Parker's style.'--_Daily Telegraph._ + + + MRS. FALCHION. _Fourth Edition._ + + 'A splendid study of character.'--_Athenaeum._ + + 'But little behind anything that has been done by any writer of our + time.'--_Pall Mall Gazette._ + + 'A very striking and admirable novel.'--_St. James's Gazette._ + + + THE TRANSLATION OF A SAVAGE. + + 'The plot is original and one difficult to work out; but Mr. Parker + has done it with great skill and delicacy. The reader who is not + interested in this original, fresh, and well-told tale must be a dull + person indeed.'--_Daily Chronicle._ + + + THE TRAIL OF THE SWORD. _Fifth Edition._ + + 'Everybody with a soul for romance will thoroughly enjoy "The Trail of + the Sword."'--_St. James's Gazette._ + + 'A rousing and dramatic tale. A book like this, in which swords flash, + great surprises are undertaken, and daring deeds done, in which men + and women live and love in the old straightforward passionate way, is + a joy inexpressible to the reviewer.'--_Daily Chronicle._ + + + WHEN VALMOND CAME TO PONTIAC: The Story of a Lost Napoleon. _Fourth + Edition._ + + 'Here we find romance--real, breathing, living romance, but it runs + flush with our own times, level with our own feelings. The character + of Valmond is drawn unerringly; his career, brief as it is, is placed + before us as convincingly as history itself. The book must be read, we + may say re-read, for any one thoroughly to appreciate Mr. Parker's + delicate touch and innate sympathy with humanity.'--_Pall Mall + Gazette._ + + 'The one work of genius which 1895 has as yet produced.'--_New Age._ + + + AN ADVENTURER OF THE NORTH: The Last Adventures of 'Pretty Pierre.' + _Second Edition._ + + 'The present book is full of fine and moving stories of the great + North, and it will add to Mr. Parker's already high + reputation.'--_Glasgow Herald._ + + + THE SEATS OF THE MIGHTY. _Illustrated._ _Eighth Edition._ + + 'The best thing he has done; one of the best things that any one has + done lately.'--_St. James's Gazette._ + + 'Mr. Parker seems to become stronger and easier with every serious + novel that he attempts.... In "The Seats of the Mighty" he shows the + matured power which his former novels have led us to expect, and has + produced a really fine historical novel.... Most sincerely is Mr. + Parker to be congratulated on the finest novel he has yet + written.'--_Athenaeum._ + + 'Mr. Parker's latest book places him in the front rank of living + novelists. "The Seats of the Mighty" is a great book.'--_Black and + White._ + + 'One of the strongest stories of historical interest and adventure + that we have read for many a day.... A notable and successful + book.'--_Speaker._ + + + #Conan Doyle.# ROUND THE RED LAMP. By A. CONAN DOYLE, Author of 'The + White Company,' 'The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes,' etc. _Fifth + Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'The book is, indeed, composed of leaves from life, and is far and + away the best view that has been vouchsafed us behind the scenes of + the consulting-room. It is very superior to "The Diary of a late + Physician."'--_Illustrated London News._ + + + #Stanley Weyman.# UNDER THE RED ROBE. By STANLEY WEYMAN, Author of 'A + Gentleman of France.' With Twelve Illustrations by R. Caton Woodville. + _Twelfth Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'A book of which we have read every word for the sheer pleasure of + reading, and which we put down with a pang that we cannot forget it + all and start again.'--_Westminster Gazette._ + + 'Every one who reads books at all must read this thrilling romance, + from the first page of which to the last the breathless reader is + haled along. An inspiration of "manliness and courage."'--_Daily + Chronicle._ + + + #Lucas Malet.# THE WAGES OF SIN. By LUCAS MALET. _Thirteenth Edition._ + _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + #Lucas Malet.# THE CARISSIMA. By LUCAS MALET, Author of 'The Wages of + Sin,' etc. _Third Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + #Arthur Morrison.# TALES OF MEAN STREETS. By ARTHUR MORRISON. _Fourth + Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'Told with consummate art and extraordinary detail. He tells a plain, + unvarnished tale, and the very truth of it makes for beauty. In the + true humanity of the book lies its justification, the permanence of + its interest, and its indubitable triumph.'--_Athenaeum._ + + 'A great book. The author's method is amazingly effective, and + produces a thrilling sense of reality. The writer lays upon us a + master hand. The book is simply appalling and irresistible in its + interest. It is humorous also; without humour it would not make the + mark it is certain to make.'--_World._ + + + #Arthur Morrison.# A CHILD OF THE JAGO. By ARTHUR MORRISON. _Third + Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + This, the first long story which Mr. Morrison has written, is like his + remarkable 'Tales of Mean Streets,' a realistic study of East End + life. + + 'The book is a masterpiece.'--_Pall Mall Gazette._ + + 'Told with great vigour and powerful simplicity.'--_Athenaeum._ + + + #Mrs. Clifford.# A FLASH OF SUMMER. By Mrs. W. K. CLIFFORD, Author of + 'Aunt Anne,' etc. _Second Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'The story is a very sad and a very beautiful one, exquisitely told, + and enriched with many subtle touches of wise and tender insight. It + will, undoubtedly, add to its author's reputation--already high--in + the ranks of novelists.'--_Speaker._ + + + #Emily Lawless.# HURRISH. By the Honble. EMILY LAWLESS, Author of + 'Maelcho,' etc. _Fifth Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + A reissue of Miss Lawless' most popular novel, uniform with 'Maelcho.' + + + #Emily Lawless.# MAELCHO: a Sixteenth Century Romance. By the Honble. + EMILY LAWLESS. _Second Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'A really great book.'--_Spectator._ + + 'There is no keener pleasure in life than the recognition of genius. + Good work is commoner than it used to be, but the best is as rare as + ever. All the more gladly, therefore, do we welcome in "Maelcho" a + piece of work of the first order, which we do not hesitate to describe + as one of the most remarkable literary achievements of this + generation. Miss Lawless is possessed of the very essence of + historical genius.'--_Manchester Guardian._ + + + #J. H. Findlater.# THE GREEN GRAVES OF BALGOWRIE. By JANE H. + FINDLATER. _Fourth Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'A powerful and vivid story.'--_Standard._ + + 'A beautiful story, sad and strange as truth itself.'--_Vanity Fair._ + + 'A work of remarkable interest and originality.'--_National Observer._ + + 'A very charming and pathetic tale.'--_Pall Mall Gazette._ + + 'A singularly original, clever, and beautiful story.'--_Guardian._ + + '"The Green Graves of Balgowrie" reveals to us a new Scotch writer of + undoubted faculty and reserve force.'--_Spectator._ + + 'An exquisite idyll, delicate, affecting, and beautiful.'--_Black and + White._ + + + #H. G Wells.# THE STOLEN BACILLUS, and other Stories. By H. G. WELLS, + Author of 'The Time Machine.' _Second Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'The ordinary reader of fiction may be glad to know that these stories + are eminently readable from one cover to the other, but they are more + than that; they are the impressions of a very striking imagination, + which, it would seem, has a great deal within its reach.'--_Saturday + Review._ + + + #H. G. WELLS.# THE PLATTNER STORY AND OTHERS. By H. G. WELLS. _Second + Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'Weird and mysterious, they seem to hold the reader as by a magic + spell.'--_Scotsman._ + + 'Such is the fascination of this writer's skill that you + unhesitatingly prophesy that none of the many readers, however his + flesh do creep, will relinquish the volume ere he has read from first + word to last.'--_Black and White._ + + 'No volume has appeared for a long time so likely to give equal + pleasure to the simplest reader and to the most fastidious + critic.'--_Academy._ + + 'Mr. Wells is a magician skilled in wielding that most potent of all + spells--the fear of the unknown.'--_Daily Telegraph._ + + + #E. F. Benson.# DODO: A DETAIL OF THE DAY. By E. F. BENSON. _Sixteenth + Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'A delightfully witty sketch of society.'--_Spectator._ + + 'A perpetual feast of epigram and paradox.'--_Speaker._ + + + #E. F. Benson.# THE RUBICON. By E. F. BENSON, Author of 'Dodo.' _Fifth + Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'An exceptional achievement; a notable advance on his previous + work.'--_National Observer._ + + + #Mrs. Oliphant.# SIR ROBERT'S FORTUNE. By MRS. OLIPHANT. _Crown 8vo._ + _6s._ + + 'Full of her own peculiar charm of style and simple, subtle + character-painting comes her new gift, the delightful story before us. + The scene mostly lies in the moors, and at the touch of the authoress + a Scotch moor becomes a living thing, strong, tender, beautiful, and + changeful.'--_Pall Mall Gazette._ + + + #Mrs. Oliphant.# THE TWO MARYS. By MRS. OLIPHANT. _Second Edition._ + _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + + #W. E. Norris.# MATTHEW AUSTIN. By W. E. NORRIS, Author of + 'Mademoiselle de Mersac,' etc. _Fourth Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + '"Matthew Austin" may safely be pronounced one of the most + intellectually satisfactory and morally bracing novels of the current + year.'--_Daily Telegraph._ + + + #W. E. Norris.# HIS GRACE. By W. E. 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By ROBERT BARR. _Third + Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'A book which has abundantly satisfied us by its capital + humour.'--_Daily Chronicle._ + + 'Mr. Barr has achieved a triumph whereof he has every reason to be + proud.'--_Pall Mall Gazette._ + + + #J. Maclaren Cobban.# THE KING OF ANDAMAN: A Saviour of Society. By J. + MACLAREN COBBAN. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'An unquestionably interesting book. It would not surprise us if it + turns out to be the most interesting novel of the season, for it + contains one character, at least, who has in him the root of + immortality, and the book itself is ever exhaling the sweet savour of + the unexpected.... Plot is forgotten and incident fades, and only the + really human endures, and throughout this book there stands out in + bold and beautiful relief its high-souled and chivalric protagonist, + James the Master of Hutcheon, the King of Andaman himself.'--_Pall + Mall Gazette._ + + + #J. Maclaren Cobban.# WILT THOU HAVE THIS WOMAN? By J. M. 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WALFORD, Author of + 'Mr. Smith,' etc. _Second Edition._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'The story is fresh and healthy from beginning to finish; and our + liking for the two simple people who are the successors to the title + mounts steadily, and ends almost in respect.'--_Scotsman._ + + + #T. L. Paton.# A HOME IN INVERESK. By T. L. PATON. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'A pleasant and well-written story.'--_Daily Chronicle._ + + + #John Davidson.# MISS ARMSTRONG'S AND OTHER CIRCUMSTANCES. By JOHN + DAVIDSON. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'Throughout the volume there is a strong vein of originality, and a + knowledge of human nature that are worthy of the highest + praise.'--_Scotsman._ + + + #M. M. Dowie.# GALLIA. 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By CLIVE + PHILLIPS WOLLEY. _Illustrated._ _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'A book which will delight boys: a book which upholds the healthy + schoolboy code of morality.'--_Scotsman._ + + + #L. Daintrey.# THE KING OF ALBERIA. A Romance of the Balkans. By LAURA + DAINTREY. _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'Miss Daintrey seems to have an intimate acquaintance with the people + and politics of the Balkan countries in which the scene of her lively + and picturesque romance is laid.'--_Glasgow Herald._ + + + #M. A. Owen.# THE DAUGHTER OF ALOUETTE. By MARY A. OWEN. _Crown 8vo._ + _6s._ + + A story of life among the American Indians. + + 'A fascinating story.'--_Literary World._ + + + #Mrs. Pinsent.# CHILDREN OF THIS WORLD. By ELLEN F. PINSENT, Author of + 'Jenny's Case.' _Crown 8vo._ _6s._ + + 'Mrs. Pinsent's new novel has plenty of vigour, variety, and good + writing. There are certainty of purpose, strength of touch, and + clearness of vision.'--_Athenaeum._ + + + #Clark Russell.# MY DANISH SWEETHEART. 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By 'VERA.' + A WOMAN OF FORTY. By ESME STUART. + A CUMBERER OF THE GROUND. By CONSTANCE SMITH. + THE SIN OF ANGELS. By EVELYN DICKINSON. + AUT DIABOLUS AUT NIHIL. By X. L. + THE COMING OF CUCULAIN. By STANDISH O'GRADY. + THE GODS GIVE MY DONKEY WINGS. By ANGUS EVAN ABBOTT. + THE STAR GAZERS. By G. MANVILLE FENN. + THE POISON OF ASPS. By R. ORTON PROWSE. + THE QUIET MRS. FLEMING. By R. PRYCE. + DISENCHANTMENT. By F. MABEL ROBINSON. + THE SQUIRE OF WANDALES. By A. SHIELD. + A REVEREND GENTLEMAN. By J. M. COBBAN. + A DEPLORABLE AFFAIR. By W. E. NORRIS. + A CAVALIER'S LADYE. By MRS. DICKER. + THE PRODIGALS. By MRS. OLIPHANT. + THE SUPPLANTER. By P. NEUMANN. + A MAN WITH BLACK EYELASHES. By H. A. KENNEDY. + A HANDFUL OF EXOTICS. By S. GORDON. + AN ODD EXPERIMENT. By HANNAH LYNCH. + + + HALF-CROWN NOVELS 2/6 + + _A Series of Novels by popular Authors._ + + + 1. HOVENDEN, V.C. By F. MABEL ROBINSON. + 2. ELI'S CHILDREN. By G. MANVILLE FENN. + 3. A DOUBLE KNOT. By G. MANVILLE FENN. + 4. DISARMED. By M. BETHAM EDWARDS. + 5. A MARRIAGE AT SEA. By W. CLARK RUSSELL. + 6. IN TENT AND BUNGALOW. By the Author of 'Indian Idylls.' + 7. MY STEWARDSHIP. By E. M'QUEEN GRAY. + 8. JACK'S FATHER. By W. E. NORRIS. + 9. JIM B. + 10. THE PLAN OF CAMPAIGN. By F. MABEL ROBINSON. + 11. MR. BUTLER'S WARD. By F. MABEL ROBINSON. + 12. A LOST ILLUSION. By LESLIE KEITH. + + * * * * * + + #Lynn Linton.# THE TRUE HISTORY OF JOSHUA DAVIDSON, Christian and + Communist. By E. LYNN LINTON. _Eleventh Edition._ _Post 8vo._ _1s._ + + * * * * * + + + #Books for Boys and Girls# 3/6 + + _A Series of Books by well-known Authors, well illustrated._ + + + 1. THE ICELANDER'S SWORD. By S. BARING GOULD. + 2. TWO LITTLE CHILDREN AND CHING. By EDITH E. CUTHELL. + 3. TODDLEBEN'S HERO. By M. M. BLAKE. + 4. ONLY A GUARD-ROOM DOG. By EDITH E. CUTHELL. + 5. THE DOCTOR OF THE JULIET. By HARRY COLLINGWOOD. + 6. MASTER ROCKAFELLAR'S VOYAGE. By W. CLARK RUSSELL. + 7. SYD BELTON: Or, The Boy who would not go to Sea. By G. MANVILLE FENN. + + + #The Peacock Library# 3/6 + + _A Series of Books for Girls by well-known Authors, handsomely bound + in blue and silver, and well illustrated._ + + + 1. A PINCH OF EXPERIENCE. By L. B. WALFORD. + 2. THE RED GRANGE. By MRS. MOLESWORTH. + 3. THE SECRET OF MADAME DE MONLUC. By the Author of 'Mdle Mori.' + 4. DUMPS. By MRS. PARR, Author of 'Adam and Eve.' + 5. OUT OF THE FASHION. By L. T. MEADE. + 6. A GIRL OF THE PEOPLE. By L. T. MEADE. + 7. HEPSY GIPSY. By L. T. MEADE. _2s. 6d._ + 8. THE HONOURABLE MISS. By L. T. MEADE. + 9. MY LAND OF BEULAH. By MRS. LEITH ADAMS. + + + #University Extension Series# + + A series of books on historical, literary, and scientific subjects, + suitable for extension students and home-reading circles. Each volume + is complete in itself, and the subjects are treated by competent + writers in a broad and philosophic spirit. + + Edited by J. E. SYMES, M.A., Principal of University College, + Nottingham. + + _Crown 8vo._ _Price (with some exceptions) 2s. 6d._ + + _The following volumes are ready:--_ + + + THE INDUSTRIAL HISTORY OF ENGLAND. By H. DE B. GIBBINS, D.Litt., M.A., + late Scholar of Wadham College, Oxon., Cobden Prizeman. _Fifth + Edition, Revised._ _With Maps and Plans._ _3s._ + + 'A compact and clear story of our industrial development. A study of + this concise but luminous book cannot fail to give the reader a clear + insight into the principal phenomena of our industrial history. The + editor and publishers are to be congratulated on this first volume of + their venture, and we shall look with expectant interest for the + succeeding volumes of the series.'--_University Extension Journal._ + + + A HISTORY OF ENGLISH POLITICAL ECONOMY. By L. L. PRICE, M.A., Fellow + of Oriel College, Oxon. _Second Edition._ + + + PROBLEMS OF POVERTY: An Inquiry into the Industrial Conditions of the + Poor. By J. A. HOBSON, M.A. _Third Edition._ + + + VICTORIAN POETS. By A. SHARP. + + + THE FRENCH REVOLUTION. By J. E. SYMES, M.A. + + + PSYCHOLOGY. By F. S. GRANGER, M.A. + + + THE EVOLUTION OF PLANT LIFE: Lower Forms. By G. MASSEE. _With + Illustrations._ + + + AIR AND WATER. Professor V. B. LEWES, M.A. _Illustrated._ + + + THE CHEMISTRY OF LIFE AND HEALTH. By C. W. KIMMINS, M.A. + _Illustrated._ + + + THE MECHANICS OF DAILY LIFE. By V. P. SELLS, M.A. _Illustrated._ + + + ENGLISH SOCIAL REFORMERS. H. DE B. GIBBINS, D.Litt., M.A. + + + ENGLISH TRADE AND FINANCE IN THE SEVENTEENTH CENTURY. By W. A. S. + HEWINS, B.A. + + + THE CHEMISTRY OF FIRE. The Elementary Principles of Chemistry. By M. + M. PATTISON MUIR, M.A. _Illustrated._ + + + A TEXT-BOOK OF AGRICULTURAL BOTANY. By M. C. POTTER, M.A., F.L.S. + _Illustrated._ _3s. 6d._ + + + THE VAULT OF HEAVEN. A Popular Introduction to Astronomy. By R. A. + GREGORY. _With numerous Illustrations._ + + + METEOROLOGY. The Elements of Weather and Climate. By H. N. DICKSON, + F.R.S.E., F.R. Met. Soc. _Illustrated._ + + + A MANUAL OF ELECTRICAL SCIENCE. By GEORGE J. BURCH, M.A. _With + numerous Illustrations._ _3s._ + + + THE EARTH. An Introduction to Physiography. By EVAN SMALL, M.A. + _Illustrated._ + + + INSECT LIFE. By F. W. THEOBALD, M.A. _Illustrated._ + + + ENGLISH POETRY FROM BLAKE TO BROWNING. By W. M. DIXON, M.A. + + + ENGLISH LOCAL GOVERNMENT. By E. JENKS, M.A., Professor of Law at + University College, Liverpool. + + + THE GREEK VIEW OF LIFE. By G. L. DICKINSON, Fellow of King's College, + Cambridge. _Second Edition._ + + + #Social Questions of To-day# + + Edited by H. DE B. GIBBINS, D.Litt, M.A. _Crown 8vo._ _2s. 6d._ 2/6 + + A series of volumes upon those topics of social, economic, and + industrial interest that are at the present moment foremost in the + public mind. Each volume of the series is written by an author who is + an acknowledged authority upon the subject with which he deals. + + _The following Volumes of the Series are ready:--_ + + + TRADE UNIONISM--NEW AND OLD. By G. HOWELL, Author of 'The Conflicts of + Capital and Labour.' _Second Edition._ + + + THE CO-OPERATIVE MOVEMENT TO-DAY. By G. J. HOLYOAKE, Author of 'The + History of Co-Operation.' _Second Edition._ + + + MUTUAL THRIFT. By Rev. J. FROME WILKINSON, M.A., Author of 'The + Friendly Society Movement.' + + + PROBLEMS OF POVERTY: An Inquiry into the Industrial Conditions of the + Poor. By J. A. HOBSON, M.A. _Third Edition._ + + + THE COMMERCE OF NATIONS. By C. F. BASTAPLE, M.A., Professor of + Economics at Trinity College, Dublin. + + + THE ALIEN INVASION. By W. H. WILKINS, B.A., Secretary to the Society + for Preventing the Immigration of Destitute Aliens. + + + THE RURAL EXODUS. By P. ANDERSON GRAHAM. + + + LAND NATIONALIZATION. By HAROLD COX, B.A. + + + A SHORTER WORKING DAY. By H. DE B. GIBBINS, D.Litt., M.A., and R. A. + HADFIELD, of the Hecla Works, Sheffield. + + + BACK TO THE LAND: An Inquiry into the Cure for Rural Depopulation. By + H. E. MOORE. + + + TRUSTS, POOLS AND CORNERS: As affecting Commerce and Industry. By J. + STEPHEN JEANS, M.R.I., F.S.S. + + + THE FACTORY SYSTEM. By R. COOKE TAYLOR. + + + THE STATE AND ITS CHILDREN. By GERTRUDE TUCKWELL. + + WOMEN'S WORK. By LADY DILKE, Miss BULLEY, and Miss WHITLEY. + + + MUNICIPALITIES AT WORK. The Municipal Policy of Six Great Towns, and + its Influence on their Social Welfare. By FREDERICK DOLMAN. + + + SOCIALISM AND MODERN THOUGHT. By M. KAUFMANN. + + + THE HOUSING OF THE WORKING CLASSES. By R. F. BOWMAKER. + + + MODERN CIVILIZATION IN SOME OF ITS ECONOMIC ASPECTS. By W. CUNNINGHAM, + D.D., Fellow of Trinity College, Cambridge. + + + THE PROBLEM OF THE UNEMPLOYED. By J. A. HOBSON, B.A., Author of 'The + Problems of Poverty.' + + + LIFE IN WEST LONDON. By ARTHUR SHERWELL, M.A. _Second Edition._ + + + #Classical Translations# + + Edited by H. F. FOX, M.A., Fellow and Tutor of Brasenose College, + Oxford. + + Messrs. Methuen are issuing a New Series of Translations from the + Greek and Latin Classics. They have enlisted the services of some of + the best Oxford and Cambridge Scholars, and it is their intention that + the Series shall be distinguished by literary excellence as well as by + scholarly accuracy. + + + AESCHYLUS--Agamemnon, Choeephoroe, Eumenides. Translated by LEWIS + CAMPBELL, LL.D., late Professor of Greek at St. Andrews. _5s._ + + + CICERO--De Oratore I. Translated by E. N. P. MOOR, M.A. _3s. 6d._ + + + CICERO--Select Orations (Pro Milone, Pro Murena, Philippic II., In + Catilinam). Translated by H. E. D. BLAKISTON, M.A., Fellow and Tutor + of Trinity College, Oxford. _5s._ + + + CICERO--De Natura Deorum. Translated by F. BROOKS, M.A., late Scholar + of Balliol College, Oxford. _3s. 6d._ + + + LUCIAN--Six Dialogues (Nigrinus, Icaro-Menippus, The Cock, The Ship, + The Parasite, The Lover of Falsehood). Translated by S. T. IRWIN, + M.A., Assistant Master at Clifton; late Scholar of Exeter College, + Oxford. _3s. 6d._ + + + SOPHOCLES--Electra and Ajax. Translated by E. D. A. MORSHEAD, M.A., + Assistant Master at Winchester. _2s. 6d._ + + + TACITUS--Agricola and Germania. Translated by R. B. TOWNSHEND, late + Scholar of Trinity College, Cambridge. _2s. 6d._ + + + #Educational Books# + + + _CLASSICAL_ + + + PLAUTI BACCHIDES. Edited with Introduction, Commentary, and Critical + Notes by J. M'COSH, M.A. _Fcap. 4to._ _12s. 6d._ + + 'The notes are copious, and contain a great deal of information that + is good and useful.'--_Classical Review._ + + + TACITI AGRICOLL. With Introduction, Notes, Map, etc. By R. F. DAVIS, + M.A., Assistant Master at Weymouth College. _Crown 8vo._ _2s._ + + + TACITI GERMANIA. 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