initial commit of ebook 26663HEADmain

118 files changed, 11291 insertions, 0 deletions

diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..6833f05
--- /dev/null
+++ b/.gitattributes
@@ -0,0 +1,3 @@
+* text=auto
+*.txt text
+*.md text
diff --git a/26663-8.txt b/26663-8.txt
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..a465edc
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-8.txt
@@ -0,0 +1,5270 @@
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Fruits of Culture, by Leo Tolstoy
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Fruits of Culture
+
+Author: Leo Tolstoy
+
+Translator: Louise Maude
+            Aylmer Maude
+
+Release Date: September 20, 2008 [EBook #26663]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK FRUITS OF CULTURE ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Bryan Ness, Jana Srna and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+  [ Transcriber's Note:
+    This e-book belongs to Tolstoy's Plays (Complete Edition). The
+    front matter, including the table of contents, can be found in
+    e-book #26660; it lists the other plays in the collection.
+
+    Every effort has been made to replicate this text as faithfully as
+    possible; changes (corrections of spelling and punctuation) made to
+    the original text are listed at the end of this file.
+  ]
+
+
+
+
+                           FRUITS OF CULTURE
+
+                         A COMEDY IN FOUR ACTS
+
+                                (1889)
+
+
+
+
+CHARACTERS
+
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH ZVEZDÍNTSEF. A retired Lieutenant of the Horse Guards.
+Owner of more than 60,000 acres of land in various provinces. A
+fresh-looking, bland, agreeable gentleman of 60. Believes in
+Spiritualism, and likes to astonish people with his wonderful stories.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA ZVEZDÍNTSEVA. Wife of Leoníd. Stout; pretends to be young;
+quite taken up with the conventionalities of life; despises her husband,
+and blindly believes in her doctor. Very irritable.
+
+BETSY. Their daughter. A young woman of 20, fast, tries to be mannish,
+wears a pince-nez, flirts and giggles. Speaks very quickly and
+distinctly.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH ZVEZDÍNTSEF. Their son, aged 25; has studied law, but
+has no definite occupation. Member of the Cycling Club, Jockey Club, and
+of the Society for Promoting the Breeding of Hounds. Enjoys perfect
+health, and has imperturbable self-assurance. Speaks loud and abruptly.
+Is either perfectly serious--almost morose, or is noisily gay and laughs
+loud. Is nicknamed Vovo.
+
+ALEXÉY VLADÍMIRITCH KROUGOSVÉTLOF. A professor and scientist of about
+50, with quiet and pleasantly self-possessed manners, and quiet,
+deliberate, harmonious speech. Likes to talk. Is mildly disdainful of
+those who do not agree with him. Smokes much. Is lean and active.
+
+THE DOCTOR. About 40. Healthy, fat, red-faced, loud-voiced, and rough;
+with a self-satisfied smile constantly on his lips.
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA. A girl of 20, from the Conservatoire, teacher of
+music. Wears a fringe, and is super-fashionably dressed. Obsequious, and
+gets easily confused.
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. About 28; has taken his degree in philology, and is looking
+out for a position. Member of the same clubs as Vasíly Leoníditch, and
+also of the Society for the Organisation of Calico Balls.[1] Is
+bald-headed, quick in movement and speech, and very polite.
+
+  [1] Economical balls at which the ladies are bound to appear in
+  dresses made of cotton materials.
+
+THE BARONESS. A pompous lady of about 50, slow in her movements, speaks
+with monotonous intonation.
+
+THE PRINCESS. A society woman, a visitor.
+
+HER DAUGHTER. An affected young society woman, a visitor.
+
+THE COUNTESS. An ancient dame, with false hair and teeth. Moves with
+great difficulty.
+
+GROSSMAN. A dark, nervous, lively man of Jewish type. Speaks very loud.
+
+THE FAT LADY: MÁRYA VASÍLEVNA TOLBOÚHINA. A very distinguished, rich,
+and kindly woman, acquainted with all the notable people of the last and
+present generations. Very stout. Speaks hurriedly, trying to be heard
+above every one else. Smokes.
+
+BARON KLÍNGEN (nicknamed KOKO). A graduate of Petersburg University.
+Gentleman of the Bedchamber, Attaché to an Embassy. Is perfectly correct
+in his deportment, and therefore enjoys peace of mind and is quietly
+gay.
+
+TWO SILENT LADIES.
+
+SERGÉY IVÁNITCH SAHÁTOF. About 50, an ex-Assistant Minister of State. An
+elegant gentleman, of wide European culture, engaged in nothing and
+interested in everything. His carriage is dignified and at times even
+severe.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Personal attendant on Zvezdíntsef, aged about 60. A
+man of some education and fond of information. Uses his pince-nez and
+pocket-handkerchief too much, unfolding the latter very slowly. Takes an
+interest in politics. Is kindly and sensible.
+
+GREGORY. A footman, about 28, handsome, profligate, envious, and
+insolent.
+
+JACOB. Butler, about 40, a bustling, kindly man, to whom the interests
+of his family in the village are all-important.
+
+SIMON. The butler's assistant, about 20, a healthy, fresh, peasant lad,
+fair, beardless as yet; calm and smiling.
+
+THE COACHMAN. A man of about 35, a dandy. Has moustaches but no beard.
+Rude and decided.
+
+A DISCHARGED MAN-COOK. About 45, dishevelled, unshaved, bloated, yellow
+and trembling. Dressed in a ragged, light summer-overcoat and dirty
+trousers. Speaks hoarsely, ejecting the words abruptly.
+
+THE SERVANTS' COOK. A talkative, dissatisfied woman of 30.
+
+THE DOORKEEPER. A retired soldier.
+
+TÁNYA (TATYÁNA MÁRKOVNA). Lady's-maid, 19, energetic, strong, merry,
+with quickly-changing moods. At moments, when strongly excited, she
+shrieks with joy.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. About 60. Has served as village Elder. Imagines that he
+knows how to treat gentlefolk, and likes to hear himself talk.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. About 45, head of a family. A man of few words. Rough
+and truthful. The father of Simon.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. About 70. Wears shoes of plaited bast. Is nervous,
+restless, hurried, and tries to cover his confusion by much talking.
+
+FIRST FOOTMAN (in attendance on the Countess). An old man, with
+old-fashioned manners, and proud of his place.
+
+SECOND FOOTMAN. Of enormous size, strong, and rude.
+
+A PORTER FROM A FASHIONABLE DRESSMAKER'S SHOP. A fresh-faced man in
+dark-blue long coat. Speaks firmly, emphatically, and clearly.
+
+The action takes place in Moscow, in Zvezdíntsef's house.
+
+
+
+
+                           FRUITS OF CULTURE
+
+
+
+
+ACT I
+
+    The entrance hall of a wealthy house in Moscow. There are three
+    doors: the front door, the door of Leoníd Fyódoritch's study, and
+    the door of Vasíly Leoníditch's room. A staircase leads up to the
+    other rooms; behind it is another door leading to the servants'
+    quarters.
+
+
+SCENE 1.
+
+GREGORY [looks at himself in the glass and arranges his hair, &c.] I
+_am_ sorry about those moustaches of mine! "Moustaches are not becoming
+to a footman," she says! And why? Why, so that any one might see you're
+a footman,--else my looks might put her darling son to shame. He's a
+likely one! There's not much fear of his coming anywhere near me,
+moustaches or no moustaches! [Smiling into the glass] And what a lot of
+'em swarm round me. And yet I don't care for any of them as much as for
+that Tánya. And she only a lady's-maid! Ah well, she's nicer than any
+young lady. [Smiles] She is a duck! [Listening] Ah, here she comes.
+[Smiles] Yes, that's her, clattering with her little heels. Oh!
+
+    Enter Tánya, carrying a cloak and boots.
+
+GREGORY. My respects to you, Tatyána Márkovna.
+
+TÁNYA. What are you always looking in the glass for? Do you think
+yourself so good-looking?
+
+GREGORY. Well, and are my looks not agreeable?
+
+TÁNYA. So, so; neither agreeable nor disagreeable, but just betwixt and
+between! Why are all those cloaks hanging there?
+
+GREGORY. I am just going to put them away, your ladyship! [Takes down a
+fur cloak and, wrapping it round her, embraces her] I say, Tánya, I'll
+tell you something ...
+
+TÁNYA. Oh, get away, do! What do you mean by it? [Pulls herself angrily
+away] Leave me alone, I tell you!
+
+GREGORY [looks cautiously around] Then give me a kiss!
+
+TÁNYA. Now, really, what are you bothering for? I'll give you such a
+kiss! [Raises her hand to strike].
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [off the scene, rings and then shouts] Gregory!
+
+TÁNYA. There now, go! Vasíly Leoníditch is calling you.
+
+GREGORY. He'll wait! He's only just opened his eyes! I say, why don't
+you love me?
+
+TÁNYA. What sort of loving have you imagined now? I don't love anybody.
+
+GREGORY. That's a fib. You love Simon! You have found a nice one to
+love--a common, dirty-pawed peasant, a butler's assistant!
+
+TÁNYA. Never mind; such as he is, you are jealous of him!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [off the scene] Gregory!
+
+GREGORY. All in good time.... Jealous indeed! Of what? Why, you have
+only just begun to get licked into shape, and who are you tying yourself
+up with? Now, wouldn't it be altogether a different matter if you loved
+me?... I say, Tánya ...
+
+TÁNYA [angrily and severely] You'll get nothing from me, I tell you!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [off the scene] Gregory!!
+
+GREGORY. You're mighty particular, ain't you?
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [off the scene, shouts persistently, monotonously, and
+with all his might] Gregory! Gregory! Gregory! [Tánya and Gregory
+laugh].
+
+GREGORY. You should have seen the girls that have been sweet on me.
+[Bell rings].
+
+TÁNYA. Well then, go to them, and leave me alone!
+
+GREGORY. You are a silly, now I think of it. I'm not Simon!
+
+TÁNYA. Simon means marriage, and not tomfoolery!
+
+    Enter Porter, carrying a large cardboard box.
+
+PORTER. Good morning!
+
+GREGORY. Good morning! Where are you from?
+
+PORTER. From Bourdey's. I've brought a dress, and here's a note for the
+lady.
+
+TÁNYA [taking the note] Sit down, and I'll take it in. [Exit].
+
+    Vasíly Leoníditch looks out of the door in shirt-sleeves and
+    slippers.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Gregory!
+
+GREGORY. Yes, sir.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Gregory! Don't you hear me call?
+
+GREGORY. I've only just come, sir.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Hot water, and a cup of tea.
+
+GREGORY. Yes, sir; Simon will bring them directly.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. And who is this? Ah, from Bourdier?
+
+PORTER. Yes, sir.
+
+    Exeunt Vasíly Leoníditch and Gregory. Bell rings. Tánya runs in at
+    the sound of the bell and opens the front door.
+
+TÁNYA [to Porter] Please wait a little.
+
+PORTER. I am waiting.
+
+    Sahátof enters at front door.
+
+TÁNYA. I beg your pardon, but the footman has just gone away. This way,
+sir. Allow me, please. [Takes his fur cloak].
+
+SAHÁTOF [adjusting his clothes] Is Leoníd Fyódoritch at home? Is he up?
+[Bell rings].
+
+TÁNYA. Oh yes, sir. He's been up a long time.
+
+    Doctor enters and looks round for the footman. Sees Sahátof and
+    addresses him in an offhand manner.
+
+DOCTOR. Ah, my respects to you!
+
+SAHÁTOF [looks fixedly at him] The Doctor, I believe?
+
+DOCTOR. And I thought you were abroad! Dropped in to see Leoníd
+Fyódoritch?
+
+SAHÁTOF. Yes. And you? Is any one ill?
+
+DOCTOR [laughing] Not exactly ill, but, you know ... It's awful with
+these ladies! Sits up at cards till three every morning, and pulls her
+waist into the shape of a wine-glass. And the lady is flabby and fat,
+and carries the weight of a good many years on her back.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Is this the way you state your diagnosis to Anna Pávlovna? I
+should hardly think it quite pleases her!
+
+DOCTOR [laughing] Well, it's the truth. They do all these tricks--and
+then come derangements of the digestive organs, pressure on the liver,
+nerves, and all sorts of things, and one has to come and patch them up.
+It's just awful! [Laughs] And you? You are also a spiritualist it seems?
+
+SAHÁTOF. I? No, I am not also a spiritualist.... Good morning! [Is about
+to go, but is stopped by the Doctor].
+
+DOCTOR. No! But I can't myself, you know, positively deny the
+possibility of it, when a man like Krougosvétlof is connected with it
+all. How can one? Is he not a professor,--a European celebrity? There
+must be something in it. I should like to see for myself, but I never
+have the time. I have other things to do.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Yes, yes! Good morning. [Exit, bowing slightly].
+
+DOCTOR [to Tánya] Is Anna Pávlovna up?
+
+TÁNYA. She's in her bedroom, but please come up.
+
+    Doctor goes upstairs.
+
+    Theodore Ivánitch enters with a newspaper in his hand.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [to Porter] What is it you want?
+
+PORTER. I'm from Bourdey's. I brought a dress and a note, and was told
+to wait.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Ah, from Bourdey's! [To Tánya] Who came in just now?
+
+TÁNYA. It was Sergéy Ivánitch Sahátof and the Doctor. They stood talking
+here a bit. It was all about spiritalism.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [correcting her] Spirit_u_alism.
+
+TÁNYA. Yes, that's just what I said--spiritalism. Have you heard how
+well it went off last time, Theodore Ivánitch? [Laughs] There was
+knocks, and things flew about!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. And how do _you_ know?
+
+TÁNYA. Miss Elizabeth told me.
+
+    Jacob runs in with a tumbler of tea on a tray.
+
+JACOB [to the Porter] Good morning!
+
+PORTER [disconsolately] Good morning!
+
+    Jacob knocks at Vasíly Leoníditch's door.
+
+    Gregory enters.
+
+GREGORY. Give it here.
+
+JACOB. You didn't bring back all yesterday's tumblers, nor the tray
+Vasíly Leoníditch had. And it's me that have to answer for them!
+
+GREGORY. The tray is full of cigars.
+
+JACOB. Well, put them somewhere else. It's me who's answerable for it.
+
+GREGORY. I'll bring it back! I'll bring it back!
+
+JACOB. Yes, so you say, but it is not where it ought to be. The other
+day, just as the tea had to be served, it was not to be found.
+
+GREGORY. I'll bring it back, I tell you. What a fuss!
+
+JACOB. It's easy for you to talk. Here am I serving tea for the third
+time, and now there's the lunch to get ready. One does nothing but rush
+about the livelong day. Is there any one in the house who has more to do
+than me? Yet they are never satisfied with me.
+
+GREGORY. Dear me? Who could wish for any one more satisfactory? You're
+such a fine fellow!
+
+TÁNYA. Nobody is good enough for you! You alone ...
+
+GREGORY [to Tánya] No one asked your opinion! [Exit].
+
+JACOB. Ah well, I don't mind. Tatyána Márkovna, did the mistress say
+anything about yesterday?
+
+TÁNYA. About the lamp, you mean?
+
+JACOB. And how it managed to drop out of my hands, the Lord only knows!
+Just as I began rubbing it, and was going to take hold of it in another
+place, out it slips and goes all to pieces. It's just my luck! It's easy
+for that Gregory Miháylitch to talk--a single man like him! But when one
+has a family, one has to consider things: they have to be fed. I don't
+mind work.... So she didn't say anything? The Lord be thanked!... Oh,
+Theodore Ivánitch, have you one spoon or two?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. One. Only one! [Reads newspaper].
+
+    Exit Jacob.
+
+    Bell rings. Enter Gregory (carrying a tray) and the Doorkeeper.
+
+DOORKEEPER [to Gregory] Tell the master some peasants have come from the
+village.
+
+GREGORY [pointing to Theodore Ivánitch] Tell the major-domo here, it's
+his business. I have no time. [Exit].
+
+TÁNYA. Where are these peasants from?
+
+DOORKEEPER. From Koursk, I think.
+
+TÁNYA [shrieks with delight] It's them.... It's Simon's father come
+about the land! I'll go and meet them! [Runs off].
+
+DOORKEEPER. Well, then, what shall I say to them? Shall they come in
+here? They say they've come about the land--the master knows, they say.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes, they want to purchase some land. All right! But
+he has a visitor now, so you had better tell them to wait.
+
+DOORKEEPER. Where shall they wait?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Let them wait outside. I'll send for them when the
+time comes. [Exit Doorkeeper]
+
+    Enter Tánya, followed by three Peasants.
+
+TÁNYA. To the right. In here! In here!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I did not want them brought in here!
+
+GREGORY. Forward minx!
+
+TÁNYA. Oh, Theodore Ivánitch, it won't matter, they'll stand in this
+corner.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. They'll dirty the floor.
+
+TÁNYA. They've scraped their shoes, and I'll wipe the floor up
+afterwards. [To Peasants] Here, stand just here.
+
+    Peasants come forward carrying presents tied in cotton
+    handkerchiefs: cake, eggs, and embroidered towels. They look around
+    for an icón before which to cross themselves; not finding one, they
+    cross themselves looking at the staircase.
+
+GREGORY [to Theodore Ivánitch]. There now, Theodore Ivánitch, they say
+Pironnet's boots are an elegant shape. But those there are ever so much
+better. [Pointing to the third Peasant's bast shoes].
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Why will you always be ridiculing people? [Exit
+Gregory].
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [rises and goes up to the Peasants] So you are from
+Koursk? And have come to arrange about buying some land?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Just so. We might say, it is for the completion of the
+purchase of the land we have come. How could we announce ourselves to
+the master?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes, yes, I know. You wait a bit and I'll go and
+inform him. [Exit].
+
+    The Peasants look around; they are embarrassed where to put their
+    presents.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. There now, couldn't we have what d'you call it? Something
+to present these here things on? To do it in a genteel way, like,--a
+little dish or something.
+
+TÁNYA. All right, directly; put them down here for the present. [Puts
+bundles on settle].
+
+FIRST PEASANT. There now,--that respectable gentleman that was here just
+now,--what might be his station?
+
+TÁNYA. He's the master's valet.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. I see. So he's also in service. And you, now, are you a
+servant too?
+
+TÁNYA. I am lady's-maid. Do you know, I also come from Démen! I know
+you, and you, but I don't know him. [Pointing to third Peasant].
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Them two you know, but me you don't know?
+
+TÁNYA. You are Efím Antónitch.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it!
+
+TÁNYA. And you are Simon's father, Zachary Trifánitch.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Right!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. And let me tell you, I'm Mítry Vlásitch Tchilíkin. Now do
+you know?
+
+TÁNYA. Now I shall know you too!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. And who may you be?
+
+TÁNYA. I am Aksínya's, the soldier's wife's, orphan.
+
+FIRST AND THIRD PEASANTS [with surprise] Never!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. The proverb says true:
+
+        "Buy a penny pig, put it in the rye,
+         And you'll have a wonderful fat porker by-and-by."
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it! She's got the resemblance of a duchess!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. That be so truly. Oh Lord!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. [off the scene, rings, and then shouts] Gregory!
+Gregory!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Now who's that, for example, disturbing himself in such a
+way, if I may say so?
+
+TÁNYA. That's the young master.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord! Didn't I say we'd better wait outside until the
+time comes? [Silence].
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Is it _you_, Simon wants to marry?
+
+TÁNYA. Why, has he been writing? [Hides her face in her apron].
+
+SECOND PEASANT. It's evident he's written! But it's a bad business he's
+imagined here. I see the lad's got spoilt!
+
+TÁNYA [quickly] No, he's not at all spoilt! Shall I send him to you?
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Why send him? All in good time. Where's the hurry?
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [desperately, behind scene] Gregory! Where the devil
+are you?... [Enters from his room in shirt-sleeves, adjusting his
+pince-nez].
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Is every one dead?
+
+TÁNYA. He's not here, sir.... I'll send him to you at once. [Moves
+towards the back door].
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. I could hear you talking, you know. How have these
+scarecrows sprung up here? Eh? What?
+
+TÁNYA. They're peasants from the Koursk village, sir. [Peasants bow].
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. And who is this? Oh yes, from Bourdier.
+
+    Vasíly Leoníditch pays no attention to the Peasants' bow. Tánya
+    meets Gregory at the doorway and remains on the scene.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [to Gregory] I told you the other boots... I can't
+wear these!
+
+GREGORY. Well, the others are also there.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. But where is _there_?
+
+GREGORY. Just in the same place!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. They're not!
+
+GREGORY. Well, come and see. [Exeunt Gregory and Vasíly Leoníditch].
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Say now, might we not in the meantime just go and wait,
+say, in some lodging-house or somewhere?
+
+TÁNYA. No, no, wait a little. I'll go and bring you some plates to put
+the presents on. [Exit].
+
+    Enter Sahátof and Leoníd Fyódoritch, followed by Theodore Ivánitch.
+
+    The Peasants take up the presents, and pose themselves.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [to Peasants] Presently, presently! Wait a bit!
+[Points to Porter] Who is this?
+
+PORTER. From Bourdey's.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Ah, from Bourdier.
+
+SAHÁTOF [smiling] Well, I don't deny it: still you understand that,
+never having seen it, we, the uninitiated, have some difficulty in
+believing.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. You say you find it difficult to believe! We do not
+ask for faith; all we demand of you is to investigate! How can I help
+believing in this ring? Yet this ring came from there!
+
+SAHÁTOF. From _there_? What do you mean? From where?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. From the other world. Yes!
+
+SAHÁTOF [smiling] That's very interesting--very interesting!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, supposing we admit that I'm a man carried away
+by an idea, as you think, and that I am deluding myself. Well, but what
+of Alexéy Vladímiritch Krougosvétlof--he is not just an ordinary man,
+but a distinguished professor, and yet he admits it to be a fact. And
+not he alone. What of Crookes? What of Wallace?
+
+SAHÁTOF. But I don't deny anything. I only say it is very interesting.
+It would be interesting to know how Krougosvétlof explains it!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. He has a theory of his own. Could you come
+to-night?--he is sure to be here. First we shall have Grossman--you
+know, the famous thought-reader?
+
+SAHÁTOF. Yes, I have heard of him but have never happened to meet him.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Then you must come! We shall first have Grossman,
+then Kaptchítch, and our mediumistic séance.... [To Theodore Ivánitch]
+Has the man returned from Kaptchítch?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Not yet, sir.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Then how am I to know?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Never mind, come in any case! If Kaptchítch can't
+come we shall find our own medium. Márya Ignátievna is a medium--not
+such a good one as Kaptchítch, but still ...
+
+    Tánya enters with plates for the presents, and stands listening.
+
+SAHÁTOF [smiling] Oh yes, yes. But here is one puzzling point:--how is
+it that the mediums are always of the, so-called, educated class, such
+as Kaptchítch and Márya Ignátievna? If there were such a special force,
+would it not be met with also among the common people--the peasants?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Oh yes, and it is! That is very common. Even here in
+our own house we have a peasant whom we discovered to be a medium. A few
+days ago we called him in--a sofa had to be moved, during a séance--and
+we forgot all about him. In all probability he fell asleep. And, fancy,
+after our séance was over and Kaptchítch had come to again, we suddenly
+noticed mediumistic phenomena in another part of the room, near the
+peasant: the table gave a jerk and moved!
+
+TÁNYA [aside] That was when I was getting out from under it!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. It is quite evident he also is a medium. Especially
+as he is very like Home in appearance. You remember Home--a fair-haired
+naïve sort of fellow?
+
+SAHÁTOF [shrugging his shoulders] Dear me, this is very interesting, you
+know. I think you should try him.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. So we will! And he is not alone; there are thousands
+of mediums, only we do not know them. Why, only a short time ago a
+bedridden old woman moved a brick wall!
+
+SAHÁTOF. Moved a brick ... a brick wall?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, yes. She was lying in bed, and did not even know
+she was a medium. She just leant her arm against the wall, and the wall
+moved!
+
+SAHÁTOF. And did not cave in?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. And did not cave in.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Very strange! Well then, I'll come this evening.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Pray do. We shall have a séance in any case. [Sahátof
+puts on his outdoor things, Leoníd Fyódoritch sees him to the door].
+
+PORTER [to Tánya] Do tell your mistress! Am I to spend the night here?
+
+TÁNYA. Wait a little; she's going to drive out with the young lady, so
+she'll soon be coming downstairs. [Exit].
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [comes up to the Peasants, who bow and offer him their
+presents] That's not necessary!
+
+FIRST PEASANT [smiling] Oh, but this-here is our first duty, it is! It's
+also the Commune's orders that we should do it!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. That's always been the proper way.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Say no more about it! 'Cause as we are much satisfied....
+As our parents, let's say, served, let's say, your parents, so we would
+like the same with all our hearts ... and not just anyhow! [Bows].
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. But what is it about? What do you want?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. It's to your honour we've come ...
+
+    Enter Petrístchef briskly, in fur-lined overcoat.
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Is Vasíly Leoníditch awake yet? [Seeing Leoníd Fyódoritch,
+bows, moving only his head].
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. You have come to see my son?
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. I? Yes, just to see Vovo for a moment.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Step in, step in.
+
+    Petrístchef takes off his overcoat and walks in briskly. Exit.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [to Peasants] Well, what is it you want?
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Please accept our presents!
+
+FIRST PEASANT [smiling] That's to say, the peasants' offerings.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Say no more about it; what's the good? We wish you the
+same as if you were our own father! Say no more about it!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. All right. Here, Theodore, take these.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [to Peasants] Give them here. [Takes the presents].
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, what is the business?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. We've come to your honour ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. I see you have; but what do you want?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. It's about making a move towards completing the sale of
+the land. It comes to this ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Do you mean to buy the land?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. It comes to this ... I mean the buying of
+the property of the land. The Commune has given us, let's say, the power
+of atturning, to enter, let's say, as is lawful, through the Government
+bank, with a stamp for the lawful amount.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. You mean that you want to buy the land through the
+land-bank.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. Just as you offered it to us last year.
+It comes to this, then, the whole sum in full for the buying of the
+property of the land is 32,864 roubles.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. That's all right, but how about paying up?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. As to the payment, the Commune offers just as it was said
+last year--to pay in 'stalments, and your receipt of the ready money by
+lawful regulations, 4000 roubles in full.[2]
+
+  [2] The present value of the rouble is rather over two shillings and
+  one penny.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Take 4000 now, and wait for the rest of the money.
+
+THIRD PEASANT [unwrapping a parcel of money] And about this be quite
+easy. We should pawn our own selves rather than do such a thing just
+anyhow say, but in this way, let's say, as it ought to be done.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. But did I not write and tell you that I should not
+agree to it unless you brought the whole sum?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. It would be more agreeable, but it is not
+in our possibilities, I mean.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well then, the thing can't be done!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. The Commune, for example, relied its hopes on that, that
+you made the offer last year to sell it in easy 'stalments ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. That was last year. I would have agreed to it then,
+but now I can't.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. But how's that? We've been depending on your
+promise--we've got the papers ready and have collected the money!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Be merciful, master! We're short of land; we'll say
+nothing about cattle, but even a hen, let's say, we've no room to keep.
+[Bows] Don't wrong us, master! [Bows].
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Of course it's quite true, that I agreed last year to
+let you have the land for payment by instalments, but now circumstances
+are such that it would be inconvenient.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Without this land we cannot live!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. Without land our lives must grow weaker
+and come to a decline.
+
+THIRD PEASANT [bowing] Master, we have so little land, let's not talk
+about the cattle, but even a chicken, let's say, we've no room for.
+Master, be merciful, accept the money, master!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [examining the document] I quite understand, and
+should like to help you. Wait a little; I will give you an answer in
+half-an-hour.... Theodore, say I am engaged and am not to be disturbed.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes, sir. [Exit Leoníd Fyódoritch].
+
+    The Peasants look dejected.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Here's a go! "Give me the whole sum," he says. And where
+are we to get it from?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. If he had not given us hopes, for example. As it is we
+felt quite insured it would be as was said last year.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord! and I had begun unwrapping the money. [Begins
+wrapping up the bundle of bank-notes again] What are we to do now?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What is your business, then?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Our business, respected sir, depends in this. Last year
+he made us the offer of our buying the land in 'stalments. The Commune
+entered upon these terms and gave us the powers of atturning, and now
+d'you see he makes the offering that we should pay the whole in full!
+And as it turns out, the business is no ways convenient for us.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What is the whole sum?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. The whole sum in readiness is 4000 roubles, you see.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well, what of that? Make an effort and collect more.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Such as it is, it was collected with much effort. We
+have, so to say, in this sense, not got ammunition enough.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. You can't get blood out of a stone.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. We'd be glad with all our hearts, but we have swept even
+this together, as you might say, with a broom.
+
+    Vasíly Leoníditch and Petrístchef appear in the doorway both smoking
+    cigarettes.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. I have told you already I'll do my best, so of
+course I will do all that is possible! Eh, what?
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. You must just understand that if you do not get it, the
+devil only knows what a mess we shall be in!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. But I've already said I'll do my best, and so I will.
+Eh, what?
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Nothing. I only say, get some at any cost. I will wait.
+
+    Exit into Vasíly Leoníditch's room, closing door.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [waving his arm] It's a deuce of a go! [The Peasants
+bow].
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [looking at Porter, to Theodore Ivánitch] Why don't
+you attend to this fellow from Bourdier? He hasn't come to take lodgings
+with us, has he? Just look, he is asleep! Eh, what?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. The note he brought has been sent in, and he has been
+told to wait until Anna Pávlovna comes down.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [looks at Peasants and notices the money] And what is
+this? Money? For whom? Is it for us? [To Theodore Ivánitch] Who are
+they?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. They are peasants from Koursk. They are buying land.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Has it been sold them?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. No, they have not yet come to any agreement. They are
+too stingy.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Eh? Well, we must try and persuade them. [To the
+Peasants] Here, I say, are you buying land? Eh?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. We have made an offering as how we should
+like to acquire the possession of the land.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Then you should not be so stingy, you know. Just let
+me tell you how necessary land is to peasants! Eh, what? It's very
+necessary, isn't it?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. The land appears as the very first and
+foremost necessity to a peasant. That's just it.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Then why be so stingy? Just you think what land is!
+Why, one can sow wheat on it in rows! I tell you, you could get eighty
+bushels of wheat, at a rouble and a half a bushel--that would be 120
+roubles. Eh, what? Or else mint! I tell you, you could collar 400
+roubles off an acre by sowing mint!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. All sorts of producks one could put into
+action if one had the right understanding.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Mint! Decidedly mint! I have learnt about it, you
+know. It's all printed in books. I can show them you. Eh, what?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it, all concerns are clearer to you through
+your books. That's learnedness, of course.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Then pay up and don't be stingy. [To Theodore
+Ivánitch] Where's papa?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. He gave orders not to be disturbed just now.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Oh, I suppose he's consulting a spirit whether to
+sell the land or not? Eh, what?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I can't say. All I know is that he went away
+undecided about it.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. What d'you think, Theodore Ivánitch, is he flush of
+cash? Eh, what?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I don't know. I hardly think so. But what does it
+matter to you? You drew a good sum not more than a week ago.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. But didn't I pay for those dogs? And now, you know,
+there's our new Society, and Petrístchef has been chosen, and I had
+borrowed money from Petrístchef and must pay the subscription both for
+him and for myself. Eh, what?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. And what is this new Society? A Cycling Club?
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. No. Just let me tell you. It is quite a new Society.
+It is a very serious Society, you know. And who do you think is
+President? Eh, what?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What's the object of this new Society?
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. It is a "Society to Promote the Breeding of Pure-bred
+Russian Hounds." Eh, what? And I'll tell you, they're having the first
+meeting and a lunch, to-day. And I've no money. I'll go to him and have
+a try! [Exit through study door].
+
+FIRST PEASANT [to Theodore Ivánitch] And who might he be, respected sir?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [smiles] The young master.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. The heir, so to say. Oh Lord! [puts away the money] I'd
+better hide it meanwhile.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. And we were told he was in military service, in the
+cav'rely, for example.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. No, as an only son he is exempt from military
+service.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Left for to keep his parents, so to say! That's right!
+
+SECOND PEASANT [shaking his head] He's the right sort. He'll feed them
+finely!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord!
+
+    Enter Vasíly Leoníditch followed by Leoníd Fyódoritch.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. That's always the way. It's really surprising! First
+I'm asked why I have no occupation, and now when I have found a field
+and am occupied, when a Society with serious and noble aims has been
+founded, I can't even have 300 roubles to go on with!...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. I tell you I can't do it, and I can't! I haven't got
+it.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Why, you have just sold some land.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. In the first place I have not sold it! And above all,
+do leave me in peace! Weren't you told I was engaged? [Exit, slamming
+door].
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I told you this was not the right moment.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Well, I say! Here's a position to be in! I'll go and
+see mamma--that's my only hope. He's going crazy over his spiritualism
+and forgets everything else. [Goes upstairs].
+
+    Theodore Ivánitch takes newspaper and is just going to sit down,
+    when Betsy and Márya Konstantínovna, followed by Gregory, come down
+    the stairs.
+
+BETSY. Is the carriage ready?
+
+GREGORY. Just coming to the door.
+
+BETSY [to Márya Konstantínovna] Come along, come along, I know it is he.
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA. Which he?
+
+BETSY. You know very well whom I mean--Petrístchef, of course.
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA. But where is he?
+
+BETSY. Sitting in Vovo's room. You'll see!
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA. And suppose it is not he? [The Peasants and Porter
+bow].
+
+BETSY [to Porter] You brought a dress from Bourdier's?
+
+PORTER. Yes, Miss. May I go?
+
+BETSY. Well, I don't know. Ask my mother.
+
+PORTER. I don't know whose it is, Miss; I was ordered to bring it here
+and receive the money.
+
+BETSY. Well then, wait.
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA. Is it still that costume for the charade?
+
+BETSY. Yes, a charming costume. But mamma won't take it or pay for it.
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA. But why not?
+
+BETSY. You'd better ask mamma. She doesn't grudge Vovo 500 roubles for
+his dogs, but 100 is too much for a dress. I can't act dressed like a
+scarecrow. [Pointing to Peasants] And who are these?
+
+GREGORY. Peasants who have come to buy some land or other.
+
+BETSY. And I thought they were the beaters. Are you not beaters?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. No, no, lady. We have come to see Leoníd Fyódoritch about
+the signing into our possession of the title-deeds to some land.
+
+BETSY. Then how is it? Vovo was expecting some beaters who were to come
+to-day. Are you sure you are not the beaters? [The Peasants are silent]
+How stupid they are! [Goes to Vasíly Leoníditch's door] Vovo? [Laughs].
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA. But we met him just now upstairs!
+
+BETSY. Why need you remember that? Vovo, are you there?
+
+    Petrístchef enters.
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Vovo is not here, but I am prepared to fulfil on his behalf
+anything that may be required. How do you do? How do you do, Márya
+Konstantínovna? [Shakes hands long and violently with Betsy, and then
+with Márya Konstantínovna].
+
+SECOND PEASANT. See, it's as if he were pumping water!
+
+BETSY. You can't replace him,--still you're better than nobody. [Laughs]
+What are these affairs of yours with Vovo?
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. What affairs? Our affairs are fie-nancial, that is, our
+business is fie! It's also nancial, and besides it is financial.
+
+BETSY. What does nancial mean?
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. What a question! It means nothing, that's just the point.
+
+BETSY. No, no, you have missed fire. [Laughs].
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. One can't always hit the mark, you know. It's something
+like a lottery. Blanks and blanks again, and at last you win! [Theodore
+Ivánitch goes into the study].
+
+BETSY. Well, this was blank then; but tell me, were you at the
+Mergásofs' last night?
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Not exactly at the _Mère_ Gásof's, but rather at the _Père_
+Gásof's, or better still, at the _Fils_ Gásof's.
+
+BETSY. You can't do without puns. It's an illness. And were the Gypsies
+there?[3] [Laughs].
+
+  [3] The Gypsy choirs are very popular in Moscow.
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF [sings] "On their aprons silken threads, little birds with
+golden heads!" ...
+
+BETSY. Happy mortals! And we were yawning at Fofo's.
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF [continues to sing] "And she promised and she swore, She
+would ope' her ... her ... her ..." how does it go on, Márya
+Konstantínovna?
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA. "Closet door."
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. How? What? How, Márya Konstantínovna?
+
+BETSY. _Cessez, vous devenez impossible!_[4]
+
+  [4] BETSY. Cease! You are becoming quite unbearable!
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. _J'ai cessé, j'ai bébé, j'ai dédé...._[5]
+
+  [5] PETRÍSTCHEF. I have C said (_ceased_), B said, and D said.
+
+BETSY. I see the only way to rid ourselves of your wit is to make you
+sing! Let us go into Vovo's room, his guitar is there. Come, Márya
+Konstantínovna, come! [Exeunt Betsy, Márya Konstantínovna, and
+Petrístchef].
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Who be they?
+
+GREGORY. One is our young lady, the other is a girl who teaches her
+music.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Administrates learning, so to say. And ain't she smart? A
+reg'lar picture!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Why don't they marry her? She is old enough, I should
+say.
+
+GREGORY. Do you think it's the same as among you peasants,--marry at
+fifteen?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. And that man, for example, is he also in the musitional
+line?
+
+GREGORY [mimicking him] "Musitional" indeed! You don't understand
+anything!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just so. And stupidity, one might say, is our
+ignorance.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord! [Gipsy songs and guitar accompaniment are heard
+from Vasíly Leoníditch's room].
+
+    Enter Simon, followed by Tánya, who watches the meeting between
+    father and son.
+
+GREGORY [to Simon] What do you want?
+
+SIMON. I have been to Mr. Kaptchítch.
+
+GREGORY. Well, and what's the answer?
+
+SIMON. He sent word he couldn't possibly come to-night.
+
+GREGORY. All right, I'll let them know. [Exit].
+
+SIMON [to his father] How d'you do, father! My respects to Daddy Efím
+and Daddy Mítry! How are all at home?
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Very well, Simon.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. How d'you do, lad?
+
+THIRD PEASANT. How d'you do, sonny?
+
+SIMON [smiles] Well, come along, father, and have some tea.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Wait till we've finished our business. Don't you see we
+are not ready yet?
+
+SIMON. Well, I'll wait for you by the porch. [Wishes to go away].
+
+TÁNYA [running after him] I say, why didn't you tell him anything?
+
+SIMON. How could I before all those people? Give me time, I'll tell him
+over our tea. [Exit].
+
+    Theodore Ivánitch enters and sits down by the window.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Respected sir, how's our business proceeding?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Wait a bit, he'll be out presently, he's just
+finishing.
+
+TÁNYA [to Theodore Ivánitch] And how do you know, Theodore Ivánitch, he
+is finishing?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I know that when he has finished questioning, he
+reads the question and answer aloud.
+
+TÁNYA. Can one really talk with spirits by means of a saucer?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. It seems so.
+
+TÁNYA. But supposing they tell him to sign, will he sign?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Of course he will.
+
+TÁNYA. But they do not speak with words?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Oh, yes. By means of the alphabet. He notices at
+which letter the saucer stops.
+
+TÁNYA. Yes, but at a si-ance?...
+
+    Enter Leoníd Fyódoritch.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, friends, I can't do it! I should be very glad
+to, but it is quite impossible. If it were for ready money it would be a
+different matter.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just so. What more could any one desire? But the
+people are so inpennycuous--it is quite impossible!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, I can't do it, I really can't. Here is your
+document; I can't sign it.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Show some pity, master; be merciful!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. How can you act so? It is doing us a wrong.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Nothing wrong about it, friends. I offered it you in
+summer, but then you did not agree; and now I can't agree to it.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Master, be merciful! How are we to get along? We have so
+little land. We'll say nothing about the cattle; a hen, let's say,
+there's no room to let a hen run about.
+
+    Leoníd Fyódoritch goes up to the door and stops. Enter, descending
+    the staircase, Anna Pávlovna and doctor, followed by Vasíly
+    Leoníditch, who is in a merry and playful mood and is putting some
+    bank-notes into his purse.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [tightly laced, and wearing a bonnet] Then I am to take
+it?
+
+DOCTOR. If the symptoms recur you must certainly take it, but above all,
+you must behave better. How can you expect thick syrup to pass through a
+thin little hair tube, especially when we squeeze the tube? It's
+impossible; and so it is with the biliary duct. It's simple enough.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. All right, all right!
+
+DOCTOR. Yes, "All right, all right," and you go on in the same old way.
+It won't do, madam--it won't do. Well, good-bye!
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. No, not good-bye, only _au revoir_! For I still expect
+you to-night. I shall not be able to make up my mind without you.
+
+DOCTOR. All right, if I have time I'll pop in. [Exit].
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [noticing the Peasants] What's this? What? What people are
+these? [Peasants bow].
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. These are peasants from Koursk, come to see Leoníd
+Fyódoritch about the sale of some land.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. I see they are peasants, but who let them in?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Leoníd Fyódoritch gave the order. He has just been
+speaking to them about the sale of the land.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. What sale? There is no need to sell any. But above all,
+how can one let in people from the street into the house? One can't let
+people in from the street! One can't let people into the house who have
+spent the night heaven knows where!... [Getting more and more excited] I
+daresay every fold of their clothes is full of microbes--of
+scarlet-fever microbes, of smallpox microbes, of diphtheria microbes!
+Why, they are from Koursk Government, where there is an epidemic of
+diphtheria ... Doctor! Doctor! Call the doctor back!
+
+    Leoníd Fyódoritch goes into his room and shuts the door. Gregory
+    goes to recall the Doctor.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [smokes at the Peasants] Never mind, mamma; if you
+like I'll fumigate them so that all the microbes will go to pot! Eh,
+what?
+
+    Anna Pávlovna remains severely silent, awaiting the Doctor's return.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [to Peasants] And do you fatten pigs? There's a
+first-rate business!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just so. We do go in for the pig-fattening line
+now and then.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. This kind?... [Grunts like a pig].
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Vovo, Vovo, leave off!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Isn't it like? Eh, what?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just so. It's very resemblant.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Vovo, leave off, I tell you!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. What's it all about?
+
+THIRD PEASANT. I said, we'd better go to some lodging meanwhile!
+
+    Enter Doctor and Gregory.
+
+DOCTOR. What's the matter? What's happened?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Why, you're always saying I must not get excited. Now,
+how is it possible to keep calm? I do not see my own sister for two
+months, and am careful about any doubtful visitor--and here are people
+from Koursk, straight from Koursk, where there is an epidemic of
+diphtheria, right in my house!
+
+DOCTOR. These good fellows you mean, I suppose?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Of course. Straight from a diphtheric place!
+
+DOCTOR. Well, of course, if they come from an infected place it is rash;
+but still there is no reason to excite yourself so much about it.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. But don't you yourself advise carefulness?
+
+DOCTOR. Of course, of course. Still, why excite yourself?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. How can I help it? Now we shall have to have the house
+completely disinfected.
+
+DOCTOR. Oh no! Why completely? That would cost 300 roubles or more.
+I'll arrange it cheaply and well for you. Take, to a large bottle of
+water ...
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Boiled?
+
+DOCTOR. It's all the same. Boiled would be better. To one bottle of
+water take a tablespoon of salicylic acid, and have everything they have
+come in contact with washed with the solution. As to the fellows
+themselves, they must be off, of course. That's all. Then you're quite
+safe. And it would do no harm to sprinkle some of the same solution
+through a spray--two or three tumblers--you'll see how well it will act.
+No danger whatever!
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Tánya! Where is Tánya?
+
+    Enter Tánya.
+
+TÁNYA. Did you call, M'm?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. You know that big bottle in my dressing-room?
+
+TÁNYA. Out of which we sprinkled the laundress yesterday?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Well, of course! What other bottle could I mean? Well
+then, take that bottle and first wash with soap the place where they
+have been standing, and then with ...
+
+TÁNYA. Yes, M'm; I know how.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. And then take the spray ... However, I had better do that
+myself when I get back.
+
+DOCTOR. Well then, do so, and don't be afraid! Well, _au revoir_ till
+this evening. [Exit].
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. And they must be off! Not a trace of them must remain!
+Get out, get out! Go--what are you looking at?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just so. It's because of our stupidity, as we were
+instructed ...
+
+GREGORY [pushes the Peasants out] There, there; be off!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Let me have my handkerchief back! [The handkerchief in
+which the presents were wrapped].
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord, oh Lord! didn't I say--some lodging-house
+meanwhile!
+
+    Gregory pushes him out. Exeunt Peasants.
+
+PORTER [who has repeatedly tried to say something] Will there be any
+answer?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Ah, from Bourdier? [Excitedly] None! None! You can take
+it back. I told her I never ordered such a costume, and I will not allow
+my daughter to wear it!
+
+PORTER. I know nothing about it. I was sent ...
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Go, go, take it back! I will call myself about it!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [solemnly] Sir Messenger from Bourdier, depart!
+
+PORTER. I might have been told that long ago. I have sat here nearly
+five hours!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Ambassador from Bourdier, begone!
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Cease, please!
+
+    Exit Porter.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Betsy! Where is she? I always have to wait for her.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [shouting at the top of his voice] Betsy! Petrístchef!
+Come quick, quick, quick! Eh? What?
+
+    Enter Petrístchef, Betsy, and Márya Konstantínovna.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. You always keep one waiting!
+
+BETSY. On the contrary, I was waiting for you!
+
+    Petrístchef bows with his head only, then kisses Anna Pávlovna's
+    hand.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. How d'you do! [To Betsy] You always have an answer ready!
+
+BETSY. If you are upset, mamma, I had better not go.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Are we going or not?
+
+BETSY. Well, let us go; it can't be helped.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Did you see the man from Bourdier?
+
+BETSY. Yes, and I was very glad. I ordered the costume, and am going to
+wear it when it is paid for.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. I am not going to pay for a costume that is indecent!
+
+BETSY. Why has it become indecent? First it was decent, and now you have
+a fit of prudery.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Not prudery at all! If the bodice were completely
+altered, then it would do.
+
+BETSY. Mamma, that is quite impossible.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Well, get dressed. [They sit down. Gregory puts on their
+over-shoes for them].
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Márya Konstantínovna, do you notice a vacuum in the
+hall?
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA. What is it? [Laughs in anticipation].
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Bourdier's man has gone! Eh, what? Good, eh? [Laughs
+loudly].
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Well, let us go. [Goes out of the door, but returns at
+once] Tánya!
+
+TÁNYA. Yes, M'm?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Don't let Frisk catch cold while I am away. If she wants
+to be let out, put on her little yellow cloak. She is not quite well
+to-day.
+
+TÁNYA. Yes, M'm.
+
+    Exeunt Anna Pávlovna, Betsy, and Gregory.
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Well, have you got it?
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Not without trouble, I can tell you! First I rushed
+at the gov'nor; he began to bellow and turned me out. Off to the
+mater--I got it out of her. It's here! [Slaps his breast pocket] If once
+I make up my mind, there's no getting away from me. I have a deadly
+grip! Eh, what? And d'you know, my wolf-hounds are coming to-day.
+
+    Petrístchef and Vasíly Leoníditch put on their outdoor things and go
+    out. Tánya follows.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [alone] Yes, nothing but unpleasantness. How is it
+they can't live in peace? But one must say the new generation are
+not--the thing. And as to the women's dominion!... Why, Leoníd
+Fyódoritch just now was going to put in a word, but seeing what a frenzy
+she was in--slammed the door behind him. He is a wonderfully
+kind-hearted man. Yes, wonderfully kind. What's this? Here's Tánya
+bringing them back again!
+
+TÁNYA. Come in, come in, grand-dads, never mind!
+
+    Enter Tánya and the Peasants.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Why have you brought them back?
+
+TÁNYA. Well, Theodore Ivánitch, we must do something about their
+business. I shall have to wash the place anyhow.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. But the business will not come off, I see that
+already.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. How could we best put our affair into action, respected
+sir? Your reverence might take a little trouble over it, and we should
+give you full thankings from the Commune for your trouble.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Do try, honey! We can't live! We have so little land.
+Talk of cattle--why, we have no room to keep a hen! [They bow].
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I am sorry for you, friends, but I can't think of any
+way to help you. I understand your case very well, but he has refused.
+So what can one do? Besides, the lady is also against it. Well, give me
+your papers--I'll try and see what I can do, but I hardly hope to
+succeed. [Exit].
+
+    Tánya and the three Peasants sigh.
+
+TÁNYA. But tell me, grand-dads, what is it that is wanted?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Why, only that he should put his signature to our
+document.
+
+TÁNYA. That the master should sign? Is that all?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Yes, only lay his signature on the deed and take the
+money, and there would be an end of the matter.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. He only has to write and sign, as the peasants, let's
+say, desire, so, let's say, I also desire. That's the whole affair--if
+he'd only take it and sign it, it's all done.
+
+TÁNYA [considering] He need only sign the paper and it's done?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just so. The whole matter is in dependence on
+that, and nothing else. Let him sign, and we ask no more.
+
+TÁNYA. Just wait and see what Theodore Ivánitch will say. If he cannot
+persuade the master, I'll try something.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Get round him, will you?
+
+TÁNYA. I'll try.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Ay, the lass is going to bestir herself. Only get the
+thing settled, and the Commune will bind itself to keep you all your
+life. See there, now!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. If the affair can be put into action, truly we might put
+her in a gold frame.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. That goes without saying!
+
+TÁNYA. I can't promise for certain, but as the saying is: "An attempt is
+no sin, if you try ..."
+
+FIRST PEASANT. "You may win." That's just so.
+
+    Enter Theodore Ivánitch.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. No, friends, it's no go! He has not done it, and he
+won't do it. Here, take your document. You may go.
+
+FIRST PEASANT [gives Tánya the paper] Then it's on you we pin all our
+reliance, for example.
+
+TÁNYA. Yes, yes! You go into the street, and I'll run out to you in a
+minute and have a word with you.
+
+    Exeunt Peasants.
+
+TÁNYA. Theodore Ivánitch, dear Theodore Ivánitch, ask the master to come
+out and speak to me for a moment. I have something to say to him.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What next?
+
+TÁNYA. I must, Theodore Ivánitch. Ask him, do; there's nothing wrong
+about it, on my sacred word.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. But what do you want with him?
+
+TÁNYA. That's a little secret. I will tell you later on, only ask him.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [smiling] I can't think what you are up to! All right,
+I'll go and ask him. [Exit].
+
+TÁNYA. I'll do it! Didn't he say himself that there is that power in
+Simon? And I know how to manage. No one found me out that time, and now
+I'll teach Simon what to do. If it doesn't succeed it's no great matter.
+After all it's not a sin.
+
+    Enter Leoníd Fyódoritch followed by Theodore Ivánitch.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [smiling] Is this the petitioner? Well, what is your
+business?
+
+TÁNYA. It's a little secret, Leoníd Fyódoritch; let me tell it you
+alone.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. What is it? Theodore, leave us for a minute.
+
+    Exit Theodore Ivánitch.
+
+TÁNYA. As I have grown up and lived in your house, Leoníd Fyódoritch,
+and as I am very grateful to you for everything, I shall open my heart
+to you as to a father. Simon, who is living in your house, wants to
+marry me.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. So that's it!
+
+TÁNYA. I open my heart to you as to a father! I have no one to advise
+me, being an orphan.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, and why not? He seems a nice lad.
+
+TÁNYA. Yes, that's true. He would be all right; there is only one thing
+I have my doubts about. It's something about him that I have noticed and
+can't make out ... perhaps it is something bad.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. What is it? Does he drink?
+
+TÁNYA. God forbid! But since I know that there is such a thing as
+spiritalism ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Ah, you know that?
+
+TÁNYA. Of course! I understand it very well. Some, of course, through
+ignorance, don't understand it.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, what then?
+
+TÁNYA. I am very much afraid for Simon. It does happen to him.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. What happens to him?
+
+TÁNYA. Something of a kind like spiritalism. You ask any of the
+servants. As soon as he gets drowsy at the table, the table begins to
+tremble, and creak like that: _tuke, ... tuke_! All the servants have
+heard it.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Why, it's the very thing I was saying to Sergéy
+Ivánitch this morning! Yes?...
+
+TÁNYA. Or else ... when was it?... Oh yes, last Wednesday. We sat down
+to dinner, and the spoon just jumps into his hand of itself!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Ah, that is interesting! Jumps into his hand? When he
+was drowsing?
+
+TÁNYA. That I didn't notice. I think he was, though.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes?...
+
+TÁNYA. And that's what I'm afraid of, and what I wanted to ask you
+about. May not some harm come of it? To live one's life together, and
+him having such a thing in him!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [smiling] No, you need not be afraid, there is nothing
+bad in that. It only proves him to be a _medium_--simply a medium. I
+knew him to be a medium before this.
+
+TÁNYA. So that's what it is! And I was afraid!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. No, there's nothing to be afraid of. [Aside]. That's
+capital! Kaptchítch can't come, so we will test him to-night.... [To
+Tánya] No, my dear, don't be afraid, he will be a good husband and ...
+that is only a kind of special power, and every one has it, only in some
+it is weaker and in others stronger.
+
+TÁNYA. Thank you, sir. Now I shan't think any more about it; but I was
+so frightened.... What a thing it is, our want of education!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. No, no, don't be frightened... Theodore!
+
+    Enter Theodore Ivánitch.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. I am going out now. Get everything ready for
+to-night's séance.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. But Mr. Kaptchítch is not coming.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. That does not matter. [Puts on overcoat] We shall
+have a trial séance with our own medium. [Exit. Theodore Ivánitch goes
+out with him].
+
+TÁNYA [alone] He believes it! He believes it! [Shrieks and jumps with
+joy] He really believes it! Isn't it wonderful! [Shrieks] Now I'll do
+it, if only Simon has pluck for it!
+
+    Theodore Ivánitch returns.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well, have you told him your secret?
+
+TÁNYA. I'll tell you too, only later on.... But I have a favour to ask
+of you too, Theodore Ivánitch.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes? What is it?
+
+TÁNYA [shyly] You have been a second father to me, and I will open my
+heart before you as before God.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Don't beat about the bush, but come straight to the
+point.
+
+TÁNYA. The point is ... well, the point is, that Simon wants to marry
+me.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Is that it? I thought I noticed ...
+
+TÁNYA. Well, why should I hide it? I am an orphan, and you know yourself
+how matters are in these town establishments. Every one comes bothering;
+there's that Gregory Miháylitch, for instance, he gives me no peace. And
+also that other one ... you know. They think I have no soul, and am only
+here for their amusement.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Good girl, that's right! Well, what then?
+
+TÁNYA. Well, Simon wrote to his father; and he, his father, sees me
+to-day, and says: "He's spoilt"--he means his son. Theodore Ivánitch
+[bows], take the place of a father to me, speak to the old man,--to
+Simon's father! I could take them into the kitchen, and you might come
+in and speak to the old man!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [smiling] Then I am to turn match-maker--am I? Well, I
+can do that.
+
+TÁNYA. Theodore Ivánitch, dearest, be a father to me, and I'll pray for
+you all my life long.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. All right, all right, I'll come later on. Haven't I
+promised? [Takes up newspaper].
+
+TÁNYA. You are a second father to me!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. All right, all right.
+
+TÁNYA. Then I'll rely on you. [Exit].
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [alone, shaking his head] A good affectionate girl. To
+think that so many like her perish! Get but once into trouble and she'll
+go from hand to hand until she sinks into the mire, and can never be
+found again! There was that dear little Nataly. She, too, was a good
+girl, reared and cared for by a mother. [Takes up paper] Well, let's see
+what tricks Ferdinand is up to in Bulgaria.
+
+
+                                Curtain.
+
+
+
+
+ACT II
+
+    Evening of the same day. The scene represents the interior of the
+    servants' kitchen. The Peasants have taken off their outer garments
+    and sit drinking tea at the table, and perspiring. Theodore Ivánitch
+    is smoking a cigar at the other side of the stage. The discharged
+    Cook is lying on the brick oven, and is unseen during the early part
+    of the scene.
+
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. My advice is, don't hinder him! If it's his wish and
+hers, in Heaven's name let him do it. She is a good, honest girl. Never
+mind her being a bit dressy; she can't help that, living in town: she is
+a good girl all the same.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Well, of course, if it is his wish, let him! _He'll_
+have to live with her, not me. But she's certainly uncommon spruce.
+How's one to take her into one's hut? Why, she'll not let her
+mother-in-law so much as pat her on the head.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. That does not depend on the spruceness, but on
+character. If her nature is good, she's sure to be docile and
+respectful.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Ah, well, we'll have her if the lad's bent on having
+her. After all, it's a bad job to live with one as one don't care for.
+I'll consult my missus, and then may Heaven bless them!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Then let's shake hands on it!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Well, it seems it will have to come off.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Eh, Zachary! fortune's a-smiling on you! You've come to
+accomplish a piece of business, and just see what a duchess of a
+daughter-in-law you've obtained. All that's left to be done is to have
+a drink on it, and then it will be all in order.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. That's not at all necessary. [An awkward silence].
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I know something of your way of life too, you know. I
+am even thinking of purchasing a bit of land, building a cottage, and
+working on the land myself somewhere: maybe in your neighbourhood.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. A very good thing too.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. When one has got the money one can get
+all kinds of pleasure in the country.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Say no more about it! Country life, let's say, is freer
+in every way, not like the town!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. There now, would you let me join your Commune if I
+settled among you?
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Why not? If you stand drink for the Elders, they'll
+accept you soon enough!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. And if you open a public-house, for example, or an inn,
+why, you'd have such a life you'd never need to die! You might live like
+a king, and no mistake.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well, we'll see. I should certainly like to have a
+few quiet years in my old age. Though my life here is good enough, and I
+should be sorry to leave. Leoníd Fyódoritch is an exceedingly
+kind-hearted man.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. But how about our business? Is it
+possible that he is going to leave it without any termination?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. He'd do it willingly.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. It seems he's afraid of his wife.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. It's not that he's afraid, but they don't hit things
+off together.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. But you should try, father! How are we to live else?
+We've so little land ...
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. We'll see what comes of Tánya's attempt. She's taken
+the business into her hands now!
+
+THIRD PEASANT [takes a sip of tea] Father, be merciful. We've so little
+land. A hen, let's say, we've no room for a hen, let alone the cattle.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. If the business depended on me.... [To Second
+Peasant] Well, friend, so we've done our bit of match-making! It's
+agreed then about Tánya?
+
+SECOND PEASANT. I've given my word, and I'll not go back on it without a
+good reason. If only our business succeeds!
+
+    Enter Servants' Cook who looks up at the oven, makes a sign, and
+    then begins to speak animatedly to Theodore Ivánitch.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Just now Simon was called upstairs from the front
+kitchen! The master and that other bald-headed one who calls up spirits
+with him, ordered him to sit down and take the place of Kaptchítch!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. You don't say so!
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Yes, Jacob told Tánya.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Extraordinary!
+
+    Enter Coachman.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What do you want?
+
+COACHMAN [to Theodore Ivánitch] You may just tell them I never agreed to
+live with a lot of dogs! Let any one who likes do it, but I will never
+agree to live among dogs!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What dogs?
+
+COACHMAN. Three dogs have been sent into our room by Vasíly Leoníditch!
+They've messed it all over. They're whining, and if one comes near them
+they bite--the devils! They'd tear you to pieces if you didn't mind.
+I've a good mind to take a club and smash their legs for them!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. But when did they come?
+
+COACHMAN. Why, to-day, from the Dog Show; the devil knows what kind they
+are, but they're an expensive sort. Are we or the dogs to live in the
+coachmen's quarters? You just go and ask!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes, that will never do. I'll go and ask about it.
+
+COACHMAN. They'd better be brought here to Loukérya.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK [angrily] People have to eat here, and you'd like to lock
+dogs in here! As it is ...
+
+COACHMAN. And I've got the liveries, and the sledge-covers and the
+harness there, and they expect things kept clean! Perhaps the porter's
+lodge might do.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I must ask Vasíly Leoníditch.
+
+COACHMAN [angrily] He'd better hang the brutes round his neck and lug
+them about with him! But no fear: he'd rather ride on horseback himself.
+It's he as spoilt Beauty without rhyme or reason. That was a horse!...
+Oh dear! what a life! [Exit, slamming door].
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. That's not right! Certainly not right! [To Peasants]
+Well then, it's time we were saying good-bye, friends.
+
+PEASANTS. Good-bye!
+
+    Exit Theodore Ivánitch.
+
+    As soon as he is gone a sound of groaning is heard from the top of
+    the oven.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. He's sleek, that one; looks like a general.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Rather! Why, he has a room all to himself; he gets his
+washing, his tea and sugar, and food from the master's table.
+
+DISCHARGED COOK [on the oven]. Why shouldn't the old beggar live well?
+He's lined his pockets all right!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Who's that up there, on the oven?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Oh, it's only a man.
+
+    Silence.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Well, and you too, as I noticed a while since when you
+were supping, have capital food to eat.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. We can't complain. She's not mean about the food. We
+have wheat bread every Sunday, and fish when a holiday happens to be a
+fast-day too, and those who like may eat meat.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. And does any one tuck into flesh on fast-days?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Oh, they nearly all do! Only the old coachman--not the
+one who was here just now but the old one--and Simon, and I and the
+housekeeper, fast--all the others eat meat.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. And the master himself?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Catch him! Why, I bet he's forgotten there is such a
+thing as fasting!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's the gentlefolks' way: they have got it all out of
+their books. 'Cos of their intelex!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Shouldn't wonder if they feed on wheat bread every day!
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Wheat bread indeed! Much they think of wheat bread! You
+should see what food they eat. No end of different things!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. In course gentlefolks' food is of an airial kind.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Airial, of course, but all the same they're good at
+stuffing themselves, they are!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Have healthy appekites, so to say.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. 'Cos they always rinse it down! All with sweet wines,
+and spirits, and fizzy liquors. They have a different one to suit every
+kind of food. They eat and rinse it down, and eat and rinse it down,
+they do.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. And so the food's floated down in proportion, so to say.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Ah yes, they are good at stuffing! It's awful! You see,
+it's not just sitting down, eating, then saying grace and going
+away--they're always at it!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Like pigs with their feet in the trough! [Peasants
+laugh].
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. As soon as, by God's grace, they have opened their eyes,
+the samovár is brought in--tea, coffee, chocolate. Hardly is the second
+samovár emptied, a third has to be set. Then lunch, then dinner, then
+again coffee. They've hardly left off, then comes tea, and all sorts of
+tit-bits and sweetmeats--there's never an end to it! They even lie in
+bed and eat!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. There now; that's good! [Laughs].
+
+FIRST AND SECOND PEASANTS. What are you about?
+
+THIRD PEASANT. If I could only live a single day like that!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. But when do they do their work?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Work indeed! What is their work? Cards and piano--that's
+all their work. The young lady used to sit down to the piano as soon as
+she opened her eyes, and off she'd go! And that other one who lives
+here, the teacher, stands and waits. "When will the piano be free?" When
+one has finished, off rattles the other, and sometimes they'd put two
+pianos near one another and four of 'em would bust out at once. Bust out
+in such a manner, you could hear 'em down here!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord!
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Well, and that's all the work they do! Piano or cards!
+As soon as they have met together--cards, wine, smoking, and so on all
+night long. And as soon as they are up: eating again!
+
+    Enter Simon.
+
+SIMON. Hope you're enjoying your tea!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Come and join us.
+
+SIMON [comes up to the table] Thank you kindly. [First Peasant pours out
+a cup of tea for him].
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Where have you been?
+
+SIMON. Upstairs.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Well, and what was being done there?
+
+SIMON. Why, I couldn't make it out at all! I don't know how to explain
+it.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. But what was it?
+
+SIMON. I can't explain it. They have been trying some kind of strength
+in me. I can't make it out. Tánya says, "Do it, and we'll get the land
+for our peasants; he'll sell it them."
+
+SECOND PEASANT. But how is she going to manage it?
+
+SIMON. I can't make it out, and she won't say. She says, "Do as I tell
+you," and that's all.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. But what is it you have to do?
+
+SIMON. Nothing just now. They made me sit down, put out the lights and
+told me to sleep. And Tánya had hidden herself there. They didn't see
+her, but I did.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Why? What for?
+
+SIMON. The Lord only knows--I can't make it out.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Naturally it is for the distraction of time.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Well, it's clear you and I can make nothing of it. You
+had better tell me whether you have taken all your wages yet.
+
+SIMON. No, I've not drawn any. I have twenty-eight roubles to the good,
+I think.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. That's all right! Well, if God grants that we get the
+land, I'll take you home, Simon.
+
+SIMON. With all my heart!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. You've got spoilt, I should say. You'll not want to
+plough?
+
+SIMON. Plough? Only give me the chance! Plough or mow,--I'm game. Those
+are things one doesn't forget.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. But it don't seem very desirous after town life, for
+example? Eh!
+
+SIMON. It's good enough for me. One can live in the country too.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. And Daddy Mítry here, is already on the look-out for your
+place; he's hankering after a life of luckshury!
+
+SIMON. Eh, Daddy Mítry, you'd soon get sick of it. It seems easy enough
+when one looks at it, but there's a lot of running about that takes it
+out of one.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. You should see one of their balls, Daddy Mítry, then you
+would be surprised!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Why, do they eat all the time?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. My eye! You should have seen what we had here awhile
+ago. Theodore Ivánitch took me upstairs and I peeped in. The
+ladies--awful! Dressed up! Dressed up, bless my heart, and all bare down
+to here, and their arms bare.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Faugh! How beastly!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. I take it the climate allows of that sort of thing!
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Well, daddy, so I peeped in. Dear me, what it was like!
+All of 'em in their natural skins! Would you believe it: old women--our
+mistress, only think, she's a grandmother, and even she'd gone and bared
+her shoulders.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord!
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. And what next? The music strikes up, and each man of 'em
+went up to his own, catches hold of her, and off they go twirling round
+and round!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. The old women too?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Yes, the old ones too.
+
+SIMON. No, the old ones sit still.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Get along,--I've seen it myself!
+
+SIMON. No they don't.
+
+DISCHARGED COOK [in a hoarse voice, looking down from the oven] That's
+the Polka-Mazurka. You fools don't understand what dancing is. The way
+they dance ...
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Shut up, you dancer! And keep quiet--there's some one
+coming.
+
+    Enter Gregory; old Cook hides hurriedly.
+
+GREGORY [to Servants' Cook] Bring some sour cabbage.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. I am only just up from the cellar, and now I must go
+down again! Who is it for?
+
+GREGORY. For the young ladies. Be quick, and send it up with Simon. I
+can't wait!
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. There now, they tuck into sweetmeats till they are full
+up, and then they crave for sour cabbage!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's to make a clearance.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Of course, and as soon as there is room inside, they
+begin again! [Takes basin, and exit].
+
+GREGORY [at Peasants] Look at them, how they've established themselves
+down here! Mind, if the mistress finds it out she'll give it you hot,
+like she did this morning! [Exit, laughing].
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it, she did raise a storm that time--awful!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. That time it looked as if the master was going to step
+in, but seeing that the missus was about to blow the very roof off the
+house, he slams the door. Have your own way, thinks he.
+
+THIRD PEASANT [waving his arm] It's the same everywhere. My old woman,
+let's say, she kicks up such a rumpus sometimes--it's just awful! Then I
+just get out of the hut. Let her go to Jericho! She'll give you one with
+the poker if you don't mind. Oh Lord!
+
+    Jacob enters hurriedly with a prescription.
+
+JACOB. Here, Simon, you run to the chemist's and get these powders for
+the mistress!
+
+SIMON. But master told me not to go out.
+
+JACOB. You've plenty of time; your business won't begin till after their
+tea. Hope you are enjoying your tea!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Thanks, come and join us.
+
+    Exit Simon.
+
+JACOB. I haven't time. However, I'll just have one cup for company's
+sake.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. And we've just been having a conversation as to how your
+mistress carried on so haughty this morning.
+
+JACOB. Oh, she's a reg'lar fury! So hot-tempered, that she gets quite
+beside herself. Sometimes she even bursts out crying.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Now, there's a thing I wanted to ask you about. What, for
+example, be these mikerots she was illuding to erewhile? "They've
+infested the house with mikerots, with mikerots," she says. What is one
+to make of these same mikerots?
+
+JACOB. Mikerogues, you mean! Well, it seems there is such a kind of
+bugs; all illnesses come from them, they say. So she says there are some
+of 'em on you. After you were gone, they washed and washed and sprinkled
+the place where you had stood. There's a kind of physic as kills these
+same bugs, they say.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Then where have we got these bugs on us?
+
+JACOB [drinking his tea] Why, they say they're so small that one can't
+see 'em even through a glass.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Then how does she know I've got 'em on me? Perhaps
+there's more of that muck on her than on me!
+
+JACOB. There now, you go and ask her!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. I believe it's humbug.
+
+JACOB. Of course it's bosh. The doctors must invent something, or else
+what are they paid for? There's one comes to us every day. Comes,--talks
+a bit,--and pockets ten roubles!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Nonsense!
+
+JACOB. Why, there's one as takes a hundred!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. A hundred? Humbug!
+
+JACOB. A hundred. Humbug, you say? Why, if he has to go out of town,
+he'll not do it for less than a thousand! "Give a thousand," he says,
+"or else you may kick the bucket for what I care!"
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Then does he know some charm?
+
+JACOB. I suppose he must. I served at a General's outside Moscow once: a
+cross, terrible proud old fellow he was--just awful. Well, this
+General's daughter fell ill. They send for that doctor at once. "A
+thousand roubles, then I'll come." Well, they agreed, and he came. Then
+they did something or other he didn't like, and he bawled out at the
+General and says, "Is this the way you show your respect for me? Then
+I'll not attend her!" And, oh my! The old General forgot all his pride,
+and starts wheedling him in every way not to chuck up the job!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. And he got the thousand?
+
+JACOB. Of course!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. That's easy got money. What wouldn't a peasant do with
+such a sum!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. And I think it's all bosh. That time my foot was
+festering I had it doctored ever so long. I spent nigh on five roubles
+on it,--then I gave up doctoring, and it got all right!
+
+    Discharged Cook on the oven coughs.
+
+JACOB. Ah, the old crony is here again!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Who might that man be?
+
+JACOB. He used to be our master's cook. He comes to see Loukérya.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Kitchen-master, as one might say. Then, does he live
+here?
+
+JACOB. No, they won't allow that. He's here one day, there another. If
+he's got a copper he goes to a dosshouse; but when he has drunk all, he
+comes here.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. How did he come to this?
+
+JACOB. Simply grew weak. And what a man he used to be--like a gentleman!
+Went about with a gold watch; got forty roubles a month wages. And now
+look at him! He'd have starved to death long ago if it hadn't been for
+Loukérya.
+
+    Enter Servants' Cook with the sour cabbage.
+
+JACOB [to Servants' Cook] I see you've got Paul Petróvitch here again?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. And where's he to go to? Is he to go and freeze?
+
+THIRD PEASANT. What liquor does.... Liquor, let's say ... [Clicks his
+tongue sympathetically].
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Of course. A firm man's firm as a rock; a weak man's
+weaker than water.
+
+DISCHARGED COOK [gets off the oven with trembling hands and legs]
+Loukérya, I say, give us a drop!
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. What are you up to? I'll give you such a drop!...
+
+DISCHARGED COOK. Have you no conscience? I'm dying! Brothers, a
+copper ...
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Get back on the oven, I tell you!
+
+DISCHARGED COOK. Half a glass only, cook, for Heaven's sake! I say, do
+you understand? I ask you in the name of Heaven, now!
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Come along, here's some tea for you.
+
+DISCHARGED COOK. Tea; what is tea? Weak, sloppy stuff. A little
+vódka--just one little drop ... Loukérya!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Poor old soul, what agony it is!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. You'd better give him some.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK [gets out a bottle and fills a wine-glass] Here you are;
+you'll get no more.
+
+DISCHARGED COOK [clutches hold of it and drinks, trembling all over]
+Loukérya, Cook! I am drinking, and you must understand ...
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Now then, stop your chatter! Get on to the oven, and let
+not a breath of you be heard! [The old Cook meekly begins to climb up,
+muttering something to himself].
+
+SECOND PEASANT. What it is, when a man gives way to his weakness!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it--human weakness.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. That goes without saying.
+
+    The Discharged Cook settles down, muttering all the time. Silence.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. I want to ask you something: that girl of Aksínya's as
+comes from our village and is living here. How is she? What is she
+like? How is she living--I mean, does she live honest?
+
+JACOB. She's a nice girl; one can say nothing but good of her.
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. I'll tell you straight, daddy; I know this here
+establishment out and out, and if you mean to have Tánya for your son's
+wife--be quick about it, before she comes to grief, or else she'll not
+escape!
+
+JACOB. Yes, that's true. A while ago we had a girl here, Nataly. She was
+a good girl too. And she was lost without rhyme or reason. No better
+than that chap! [Pointing to the old Cook].
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. There's enough to dam a mill-pool, with the likes of us,
+as perish! 'Cos why, every one is tempted by the easy life and the good
+food. And see there,--as soon as one has tasted the good food she goes
+and slips. And once she's slipped, they don't want her, but get a fresh
+one in her place. So it was with dear little Nataly; she also slipped,
+and they turned her out. She had a child and fell ill, and died in the
+hospital last spring. And what a girl she used to be!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord! People are weak; they ought to be pitied.
+
+DISCHARGED COOK. Those devils pity? No fear! [He hangs his legs down
+from the oven] I have stood roasting myself by the kitchen range for
+thirty years, and now that I am not wanted, I may go and die like a
+dog.... Pity indeed!...
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. It's the old circumstances.
+
+SECOND PEASANT.
+
+        While they drank and they fed, you were "curly head."
+        When they'd finished the prog, 'twas "Get out, mangy dog!"
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord!
+
+DISCHARGED COOK. Much you know. What is "Sautey a la Bongmont"? What is
+"Bavassary"? Oh, the things I could make! Think of it! The Emperor
+tasted my work, and now the devils want me no longer. But I am not going
+to stand it!
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Now then, stop that noise, mind.... Get up right into
+the corner, so that no one can see you, or else Theodore Ivánitch or
+some one may come in, and both you and me'll be turned out! [Silence].
+
+JACOB. And do you know my part of the country? I'm from Voznesénsky.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Not know it? Why, it's no more'n ten miles from our
+village; not _that_ across the ford! Do you cultivate any land there?
+
+JACOB. My brother does, and I send my wages. Though I live here, I am
+dying for a sight of home.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Then Anísim is your brother?
+
+JACOB. Own brother. He lives at the farther end of the village.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Of course, I know; his is the third house.
+
+    Enter Tánya, running.
+
+TÁNYA. Jacob, what are you doing, amusing yourself here? She is calling
+you!
+
+JACOB. I'm coming; but what's up?
+
+TÁNYA. Frisk is barking; it's hungry. And she's scolding you. "How cruel
+he is," she says. "He's no feeling," she says. "It's long past Frisk's
+dinner-time, and he has not brought her food!" [Laughs].
+
+JACOB [rises to go] Oh, she's cross? What's going to happen now, I
+wonder?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Here, take the cabbage with you.
+
+JACOB. All right, give it here. [Takes basin, and exit].
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Who is going to dine now?
+
+TÁNYA. Why, the dog! It's her dog. [Sits down and takes up the tea-pot]
+Is there any more tea? I've brought some. [Puts fresh tea into the
+tea-pot.]
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Dinner for a dog?
+
+TÁNYA. Yes, of course! They prepare a special cutlet for her; it must
+not be too fat. And I do the washing--the dog's washing, I mean.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Oh Lord!
+
+TÁNYA. It's like that gentleman who had a funeral for his dog.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. What's that?
+
+TÁNYA. Why, some one told me he had a dog--I mean the gentleman had a
+dog. And it died. It was winter, and he went in his sledge to bury that
+dog. Well, he buried it, and on the way home he sits and cries--the
+gentleman does. Well, there was such a bitter frost that the coachman's
+nose keeps running, and he has to keep wiping it. Let me fill your cup!
+[Fills it] So he keeps wiping his nose, and the gentleman sees it, and
+says, "What are you crying about?" And the coachman, he says, "Why, sir,
+how can I help it; is there another dog like him?" [Laughs].
+
+SECOND PEASANT. And I daresay he thinks to himself, "If your own self
+was to kick the bucket I'd not cry." [Laughs].
+
+DISCHARGED COOK [from up on the oven] That is true; that's right!
+
+TÁNYA. Well, the gentleman, he gets home and goes straight to his lady:
+"What a good-hearted man our coachman is; he was crying all the way home
+about poor Dash. Have him called.... Here, drink this glass of vódka,"
+he says, "and here's a rouble as a reward for you." That's just like her
+saying Jacob has no feelings for her dog! [The Peasants laugh].
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's the style!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. That was a go!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Ay, lassie, but you've set us a-laughing!
+
+TÁNYA [pouring out more tea] Have some more! Yes, it only seems that our
+life is pleasant; but sometimes it is very disgusting,--clearing up all
+their messes! Faugh! It's better in the country. [Peasants turn their
+cups upside-down, as a polite sign that they have had enough. Tánya
+pours out more tea] Have some more, Efím Antónitch. I'll fill your cup,
+Mítry Vlásitch.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. All right, fill it, fill it.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Well, dear, and what progression is our business making?
+
+TÁNYA. It's getting on ...
+
+  [Illustration: FRUITS OF CULTURE. ACT II.
+
+  FIRST PEASANT. Well, dear, and what progression is our business making?
+
+  TÁNYA. It's getting on ...]
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Simon told us ...
+
+TÁNYA [quickly] Did he?
+
+SECOND PEASANT. But he could not make us understand.
+
+TÁNYA. I can't tell you now, but I'm doing my best--all I can! And I've
+got your paper here! [Shows the paper hidden under the bib of her apron]
+If only one thing succeeds.... [Shrieks] Oh, how nice it would be!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Don't lose that paper, mind. It has cost money.
+
+TÁNYA. Never fear. You only want him to sign it? Is that all?
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Why, what else? Let's say he's signed it, and it's done!
+[Turns his cup upside-down] I've had enough.
+
+TÁNYA [aside] He'll sign it; you'll see he will... Have some more.
+[Pours out tea].
+
+FIRST PEASANT. If only you get this business about the sale of the land
+settled, the Commune would pay your marriage expenses. [Refuses the
+tea].
+
+TÁNYA [pouring out tea] Do have another cup.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. You get it done, and we'll arrange your marriage, and I
+myself, let's say, will dance at the wedding. Though I've never danced
+in all my born days, I'll dance then!
+
+TÁNYA [laughing] All right, I'll be in hopes of it. [Silence].
+
+SECOND PEASANT [examines Tánya] That's all very well, but you're not fit
+for peasant work.
+
+TÁNYA. Who? I? Why, don't you think me strong enough? You should see
+me lacing up my mistress. There's many a peasant couldn't tug as hard.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Where do you tug her to?
+
+TÁNYA. Well, there's a thing made with bone, like--something like a
+stiff jacket, only up to here! Well, and I pull the strings just as when
+you saddle a horse--when you ... what d'ye call it? You know, when you
+spit on your hands!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Tighten the girths, you mean.
+
+TÁNYA. Yes, yes, that's it. And you know I mustn't shove against her
+with my knee. [Laughs].
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Why do you pull her in?
+
+TÁNYA. For a reason!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Why, is she doing penance?
+
+TÁNYA. No, it's for beauty's sake!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's to say, you pull in her paunch for appearance'
+sake.
+
+TÁNYA. Sometimes I lace her up so that her eyes are ready to start from
+her head, and she says, "Tighter," till my hands tingle. And you say I'm
+not strong! [Peasants laugh and shake their heads].
+
+TÁNYA. But here, I've been jabbering. [Runs away, laughing].
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Ah, the lassie has made us laugh!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. She's a tidy one!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. She's not bad.
+
+    Enter Sahátof and Vasíly Leoníditch. Sahátof holds a teaspoon in his
+    hand.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Not exactly a dinner, but a _déjeuner dinatoire_. And
+first-rate it was, I tell you. Ham of sucking-pig, delicious! Roulier
+feeds one splendidly! I've only just returned. [Sees Peasants] Ah, the
+peasants are here again!
+
+SAHÁTOF. Yes, yes, that's all very well, but we came here to hide this
+article. Where shall we hide it?
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Excuse me a moment. [To Servants' Cook] Where are the
+dogs?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. In the coachman's quarters. You can't keep dogs in the
+servants' kitchen!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Ah, in the coachman's quarters? All right.
+
+SAHÁTOF. I am waiting.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Excuse me, please. Eh, what? Hide it? I'll tell you
+what. Let's put it into one of the peasants' pockets. That one. I say,
+where's your pocket? Eh, what?
+
+THIRD PEASANT. What for d'ye want my pocket? You're a good 'un! My
+pocket! There's money in my pocket!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Where's your bag, then?
+
+THIRD PEASANT. What for?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. What d'you mean? That's the young master!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [laughs. To Sahátof] D'you know why he's so
+frightened? Shall I tell you? He's got a heap of money. Eh, what?
+
+SAHÁTOF. Yes, yes, I see. Well, you talk to them a bit, and I'll put it
+into that bag without being observed, so that they should not notice and
+could not point it out to him. Talk to them.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. All right! [To Peasants] Well then, old fellows, how
+about the land? Are you buying it? Eh, what?
+
+FIRST PEASANT. We have made an offering, so to say, with our whole
+heart. But there,--the business don't come into action nohow.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. You should not be so stingy! Land is an important
+matter! I told you about planting mint. Or else tobacco would also do.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. Every kind of producks.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. And you help us, master. Ask your father. Or else how are
+we to live? There's so little land. A fowl, let's say, there's not
+enough room for a fowl to run about.
+
+SAHÁTOF [having put the spoon into a bag belonging to the Third Peasant]
+_C'est fait._ Ready. Come along. [Exit].
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. So don't be stingy! Eh? Well, good-bye. [Exit].
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Didn't I say, come to some lodging-house? Well, supposing
+we'd had to give three-pence each, then at least we'd have been in
+peace. As to here, the Lord be merciful! "Give us the money," he says.
+What's that for?
+
+SECOND PEASANT. He's drunk, I daresay.
+
+    Peasants turn their cups upside-down, rise, and cross themselves.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. And d'you mind what a saying he threw out? Sowing mint!
+One must know how to understand them, that one must!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Sow mint indeed! He'd better bend his own back at that
+work, and then it's not mint he'll hanker after, no fear! Well, many
+thanks!... And now, good woman, would you tell us where we could lie
+down to sleep?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. One of you can lie on the oven, and the others on these
+benches.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Christ save you! [Prays, crossing himself].
+
+FIRST PEASANT. If only by God's help we get our business settled! [Lies
+down] Then to-morrow, after dinner, we'd be off by the train, and on
+Tuesday we'd be home again.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Are you going to put out the light?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Put it out? Oh no! They'll keep running down here, first
+for one thing then another.... You lie down, I'll lower it.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. How is one to live, having so little land? Why, this
+year, I have had to buy corn since Christmas. And the oat-straw is all
+used up. I'd like to get hold of ten acres, and then I could take Simon
+back.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. You're a man with a family. You'd get the land cultivated
+without trouble. If only the business comes off.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. We must pray to the Holy Virgin, maybe she'll help us
+out. [Silence, broken by sighs. Then footsteps and voices are heard
+outside. The door opens. Enter Grossman hurriedly, with his eyes
+bandaged, holding Sahátof's hand, and followed by the Professor and the
+Doctor, the Fat Lady and Leoníd Fyódoritch, Betsy and Petrístchef,
+Vasíly Leoníditch and Márya Konstantínovna, Anna Pávlovna and the
+Baroness, Theodore Ivánitch and Tánya].
+
+    Peasants jump up. Grossman comes forward stepping quickly, then
+    stops.
+
+FAT LADY. You need not trouble yourselves; I have undertaken the task of
+observing, and am strictly fulfilling my duty! Mr. Sahátof, are you not
+leading him?
+
+SAHÁTOF. Of course not!
+
+FAT LADY. You must not lead him, but neither must you resist! [To Leoníd
+Fyódoritch] I know these experiments. I have tried them myself.
+Sometimes I used to feel a certain effluence, and as soon as I felt
+it ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. May I beg of you to keep perfect silence?
+
+FAT LADY. Oh, I understand so well! I have experienced it myself. As
+soon as my attention was diverted I could no longer ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Sh ...!
+
+    Grossman goes about, searches near the First and Second Peasants,
+    then approaches the Third, and stumbles over a bench.
+
+BARONESS. _Mais dites-moi, on le paye?_[6]
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. _Je ne saurais vous dire._
+
+  [6] BARONESS. But tell me, please, is he paid for this?
+
+  ANNA PÁVLOVNA. I really do not know.
+
+BARONESS. _Mais c'est un monsieur?_[7]
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. _Oh, oui!_
+
+BARONESS. _Ça tient du miraculeux. N'est ce pas? Comment est-ce qu'il
+trouve?_
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. _Je ne saurais vous dire. Mon mari vous l'expliquera._
+[Noticing Peasants, turns round, and sees the Servants' Cook] _Pardon_
+... what is this?
+
+  [7] BARONESS. But he is a gentleman?
+
+  ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Oh yes!
+
+  BARONESS. It is almost miraculous. Isn't it? How does he manage to
+  find things?
+
+  ANNA PÁVLOVNA. I really can't tell you. My husband will explain it to
+  you.... Excuse me....
+
+    Baroness goes up to the group.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [to Servants' Cook] Who let the peasants in?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. Jacob brought them in.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Who gave Jacob the order?
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. I can't say. Theodore Ivánitch has seen them.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Leoníd!
+
+    Leoníd Fyódoritch does not hear, being absorbed in the search, and
+    says, Sh ...
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Theodore Ivánitch! What is the meaning of this? Did you
+not see me disinfecting the whole hall, and now the whole kitchen is
+infected, all the rye bread, the milk ...
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I thought there would not be any danger if they came
+here. The men have come on business. They have far to go, and are from
+our village.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. That's the worst of it! They are from the Koursk village,
+where people are dying of diphtheria like flies! But the chief thing is,
+I ordered them out of the house!... Did I, or did I not? [Approaches the
+others that have gathered round the Peasants] Be careful! Don't touch
+them--they are all infected with diphtheria! [No one heeds her, and she
+steps aside in a dignified manner and stands quietly waiting].
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF [sniffs loudly] I don't know if it is diphtheria, but there
+is some kind of infection in the air. Don't you notice it?
+
+BETSY. Stop your nonsense! Vovo, which bag is it in?
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. That one, that one. He is getting near, very near!
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Is it spirits divine, or spirits of wine?
+
+BETSY. Now your cigarette comes in handy for once. Smoke closer, closer
+to me.
+
+    Petrístchef leans over her and smokes at her.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. He's getting near, I tell you. Eh, what?
+
+GROSSMAN [searches excitedly round the Third Peasant] It is here; I feel
+it is!
+
+FAT LADY. Do you feel an effluence? [Grossman stoops and finds the spoon
+in the bag].
+
+ALL. Bravo! [General enthusiasm].
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Ah! So that's where our spoon was. [To Peasants] Then
+that's the sort you are!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. What sort? I didn't take your spoon! What are you making
+out? I didn't take it, and my soul knows nothing about it. I didn't take
+it--there! Let him do what he likes. I knew he came here for no good.
+"Where's your bag?" says he. I didn't take it, the Lord is my witness!
+[Crosses himself] I didn't take it!
+
+    The young people group round the Peasant, laughing.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [angrily to his son] Always playing the fool! [To the
+Third Peasant] Never mind, friend! We know you did not take it; it was
+only an experiment.
+
+GROSSMAN [removes bandage from his eyes, and pretends to be coming to]
+Can I have a little water? [All fuss round him].
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Let's go straight from here into the coachman's
+room. I've got a bitch there--_épâtante_![8] Eh, what?
+
+  [8] Stunning!
+
+BETSY. What a horrid word. Couldn't you say dog?
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. No. I can't say--Betsy is a man, _épâtant_. I should
+have to say young woman; it's a parallel case. Eh, what? Márya
+Konstantínovna, isn't it true? Good, eh? [Laughs loudly].
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA. Well, let us go. [Exeunt Márya Konstantínovna,
+Betsy, Petrístchef, and Vasíly Leoníditch].
+
+FAT LADY [to Grossman] Well? how are you? Have you rested? [Grossman
+does not answer. To Sahátof] And you, Mr. Sahátof, did you feel the
+effluence?
+
+SAHÁTOF. I felt nothing. Yes, it was very fine--very fine. Quite a
+success!
+
+BARONESS. _Admirable! Ça ne le fait pas souffrir?_[9]
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. _Pas le moins du monde._
+
+  [9] BARONESS. Capital! Does it not cause him any pain?
+
+  LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Not the slightest.
+
+PROFESSOR [to Grossman] May I trouble you? [Hands him a thermometer] At
+the beginning of the experiment it was 37 decimal 2, degrees.[10] [To
+Doctor] That's right, I think? Would you mind feeling his pulse? Some
+loss is inevitable.
+
+  [10] He uses a Centigrade thermometer.
+
+DOCTOR [to Grossman] Now then, sir, let's have your hand; we'll see,
+we'll see. [Takes out his watch, and feels Grossman's pulse].
+
+FAT LADY [to Grossman] One moment! The condition you were in could not
+be called sleep?
+
+GROSSMAN [wearily] It was hypnosis.
+
+SAHÁTOF. In that case, are we to understand that you hypnotised
+yourself?
+
+GROSSMAN. And why not? An hypnotic state may ensue not only in
+consequence of association--the sound of the tom-tom, for instance, in
+Charcot's method--but by merely entering an hypnogenetic zone.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Granting that, it would still be desirable to define what
+hypnotism is, more exactly?
+
+PROFESSOR. Hypnotism is a phenomenon resulting from the transmutation of
+one energy into another.
+
+GROSSMAN. Charcot does not so define it.
+
+SAHÁTOF. A moment, just a moment! That is your definition, but Liébault
+told me himself ...
+
+DOCTOR [lets go of Grossman's pulse] Ah, that's all right; well now, the
+temperature?
+
+FAT LADY [interrupting] No, allow me! I agree with the Professor. And
+here's the very best proof. After my illness, when I lay insensible, a
+desire to speak came over me. In general I am of a silent disposition,
+but then I was overcome by this desire to speak, and I spoke and spoke,
+and I was told that I spoke in such a way that every one was astonished!
+[To Sahátof] But I think I interrupted you?
+
+SAHÁTOF [with dignity] Not at all. Pray continue.
+
+DOCTOR. Pulse 82, and the temperature has risen three-tenths of a
+degree.
+
+PROFESSOR. There you are! That's a proof! That's just as it should be.
+[Takes out pocket-book and writes] 82, yes? And 37 and 5. When the
+hypnotic state is induced, it invariably produces a heightened action of
+the heart.
+
+DOCTOR. I can, as a medical man, bear witness that your prognosis was
+justified by the event.
+
+PROFESSOR [to Sahátof] You were saying?...
+
+SAHÁTOF. I wished to say that Liébault told me himself that the hypnotic
+is only one particular psychical state, increasing susceptibility to
+suggestion.
+
+PROFESSOR. That is so, but still the law of equivalents is the chief
+thing.
+
+GROSSMAN. Moreover, Liébault is far from being an authority, while
+Charcot has studied the subject from all sides, and has proved that
+hypnotism produced by a blow, a trauma ...
+
+    All talking together.
+
+  { SAHÁTOF. Yes, but I don't reject Charcot's labour. I know him also,
+  { I am only repeating what Liébault told me ...
+  {
+  { GROSSMAN [excitedly] There are 3000 patients in the Salpêtrière, and
+  { I have gone through the whole course.
+  {
+  { PROFESSOR. Excuse me, gentlemen, but that is not the point.
+
+FAT LADY [interrupting] One moment, I will explain it to you in two
+words? When my husband was ill, all the doctors gave him up ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. However, we had better go upstairs again. Baroness,
+this way!
+
+    Exeunt Grossman, Sahátof, Professor, Doctor, the Fat Lady, and
+    Baroness, talking loudly and interrupting each other.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [catching hold of Leoníd Fyódoritch's arm] How often have
+I asked you not to interfere in household matters! You think of nothing
+but your nonsense, and the whole house is on my shoulders. You will
+infect us all!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. What? How? I don't understand what you mean.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. How? Why, people ill of diphtheria sleep in the kitchen,
+which is in constant communication with the whole house.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, but I ...
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. What, I?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. I know nothing about it.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. It's your duty to know, if you are the head of the
+family. Such things must not be done.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. But I never thought ... I thought ...
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. It is sickening to listen to you! [Leoníd Fyódoritch
+remains silent].
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [to Theodore Ivánitch] Turn them out at once! They are to
+leave my kitchen immediately! It is terrible! No one listens to me; they
+do it out of spite.... I turn them out from there, and they bring them
+in here! And with my illness ... [Gets more and more excited, and at
+last begins to cry] Doctor! Doctor! Peter Petróvitch!... He's gone
+too!... [Exit, sobbing, followed by Leoníd Fyódoritch].
+
+    All stand silent for a long time.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. Botheration take them all! If one don't mind, the police
+will be after one here. And I have never been to law in all my born
+days. Let's go to some lodging-house, lads!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [to Tánya] What are we to do?
+
+TÁNYA. Never mind, Theodore Ivánitch, let them sleep with the coachman.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. How can we do that? The coachman was complaining as
+it is, that his place is full of dogs.
+
+TÁNYA. Well then, the porter's lodge.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. And supposing it's found out?
+
+TÁNYA. It won't be found out! Don't trouble about that, Theodore
+Ivánitch. How can one turn them out now, at night? They'll not find
+anywhere to go to.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well, do as you please. Only they must go away from
+here. [Exit].
+
+    Peasants take their bags.
+
+DISCHARGED COOK. Oh those damned fiends! It's all their fat! Fiends!
+
+SERVANTS' COOK. You be quiet there. Thank goodness they didn't see you!
+
+TÁNYA. Well then, daddy, come along to the porter's lodge.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Well, but how about our business? How, for example, about
+the applience of his hand to the signature? May we be in hopes?
+
+TÁNYA. We'll see in an hour's time.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. You'll do the trick?
+
+TÁNYA [laughs] Yes, God willing!
+
+
+                                Curtain.
+
+
+
+
+ACT III
+
+    Evening of the same day. The small drawing-room in Leoníd
+    Fyódoritch's house, where the séances are always held. Leoníd
+    Fyódoritch and the Professor.
+
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well then, shall we risk a séance with our new
+medium?
+
+PROFESSOR. Yes, certainly. He is a powerful medium, there is no doubt
+about it. And it is especially desirable that the séance should take
+place to-day with the same people. Grossman will certainly respond to
+the influence of the mediumistic energy, and then the connection and
+identity of the different phenomena will be still more evident. You will
+see then that, if the medium is as strong as he was just now, Grossman
+will vibrate.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Then I will send for Simon and ask those who wish to
+attend to come in.
+
+PROFESSOR. Yes, all right! I will just jot down a few notes. [Takes out
+his note-book and writes].
+
+    Enter Sahátof.
+
+SAHÁTOF. They have just settled down to whist in Anna Pávlovna's
+drawing-room, and as I am not wanted there--and as I am interested in
+your séance--I have put in an appearance here. But will there be a
+séance?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, certainly!
+
+SAHÁTOF. In spite of the absence of Mr. Kaptchítch's mediumistic powers?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. _Vous avez la main heureuse._[11] Fancy, that very
+peasant whom I mentioned to you this morning, turns out to be an
+undoubted medium.
+
+  [11] LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. You bring good luck.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Dear me! Yes, that is peculiarly interesting!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, we tried a few preliminary experiments with him
+just after dinner.
+
+SAHÁTOF. So you've had time already to experiment, and to convince
+yourself ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, perfectly! And he turns out to be an
+exceptionally powerful medium.
+
+SAHÁTOF [incredulously] Dear me!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. It turns out that it has long been noticed in the
+servants' hall. When he sits down to table, the spoon springs into his
+hand of its own accord! [To the Professor] Had you heard about it?
+
+PROFESSOR. No, I had not heard that detail.
+
+SAHÁTOF [to the Professor]. But still, you admit the possibility of such
+phenomena?
+
+PROFESSOR. What phenomena?
+
+SAHÁTOF. Well, spiritualistic, mediumistic, and supernatural phenomena
+in general.
+
+PROFESSOR. The question is, what do we consider supernatural? When, not
+a living man but a piece of stone attracted a nail to itself, how did
+the phenomena strike the first observers? As something natural? Or
+supernatural?
+
+SAHÁTOF. Well, of course; but phenomena such as the magnet attracting
+iron always repeat themselves.
+
+PROFESSOR. It is just the same in this case. The phenomenon repeats
+itself and we experiment with it. And not only that, but we apply to the
+phenomena we are investigating the laws common to other phenomena. These
+phenomena seem supernatural only because their causes are attributed to
+the medium himself. But that is where the mistake lies. The phenomena
+are not caused by the medium, but by psychic energy acting through a
+medium, and that is a very different thing. The whole matter lies in the
+law of equivalents.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Yes, certainly, but ...
+
+    Enter Tánya, who hides behind the hangings.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Only remember that we cannot reckon on any results
+with certainty, with this medium any more than with Home or Kaptchítch.
+We may not succeed, but on the other hand we may even have perfect
+materialisation.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Materialisation even? What do you mean by materialisation?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Why, I mean that some one who is dead--say, your
+father or your grandfather--may appear, take you by the hand, or give
+you something; or else some one may suddenly rise into the air, as
+happened to Alexéy Vladímiritch last time.
+
+PROFESSOR. Of course, of course. But the chief thing is the explanation
+of the phenomena, and the application to them of general laws.
+
+    Enter the Fat Lady.
+
+FAT LADY. Anna Pávlovna has allowed me to join you.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Very pleased.
+
+FAT LADY. Oh, how tired Grossman seems! He could scarcely hold his cup.
+Did you notice [to the Professor] how pale he turned at the moment he
+approached the hiding-place? I noticed it at once, and was the first to
+mention it to Anna Pávlovna.
+
+PROFESSOR. Undoubtedly,--loss of vital energy.
+
+FAT LADY. Yes, it's just as I say, one should not abuse that sort of
+thing. You know, a hypnotist once suggested to a friend of mine, Véra
+Kónshin (oh, you know her, of course)--well, he suggested that she
+should leave off smoking,--and her back began to ache!
+
+PROFESSOR [trying to have his say] The temperature and the pulse clearly
+indicate ...
+
+FAT LADY. One moment! Allow me! Well, I said to her: it's better to
+smoke than to suffer so with one's nerves. Of course, smoking is
+injurious; I should like to give it up myself, but, do what I will, I
+can't! Once I managed not to smoke for a fortnight, but could hold out
+no longer.
+
+PROFESSOR [again trying to speak] Clearly proves ...
+
+FAT LADY. Yes, no! Allow me, just one word! You say, "loss of strength."
+And I was also going to say that, when I travelled with post-horses ...
+the roads used to be dreadful in those days--you don't remember--but I
+have noticed that all our nervousness comes from railways! I, for
+instance, can't sleep while travelling; I cannot fall asleep to save my
+life!
+
+PROFESSOR [makes another attempt, which the Fat Lady baffles] The loss
+of strength ...
+
+SAHÁTOF [smiling] Yes; oh yes!
+
+    Leoníd Fyódoritch rings.
+
+FAT LADY. I am awake one night, and another, and a third, and still I
+can't sleep!
+
+    Enter Gregory.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Please tell Theodore to get everything ready for the
+séance, and send Simon here--Simon, the butler's assistant,--do you
+hear?
+
+GREGORY. Yes, sir. [Exit].
+
+PROFESSOR [to Sahátof]. The observation of the temperature and the pulse
+have shown loss of vital energy. The same will happen in consequence of
+the mediumistic phenomena. The law of the conservation of energy ...
+
+FAT LADY. Oh yes, yes; I was just going to say that I am very glad that
+a simple peasant turns out to be a medium. That's very good. I always
+did say that the Slavophils ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Let's go into the drawing-room in the meantime.
+
+FAT LADY. Allow me, just one word! The Slavophils are right; but I
+always told my husband that one ought never to exaggerate anything! "The
+golden mean," you know. What is the use of maintaining that the common
+people are all perfect, when I have myself seen ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Won't you come into the drawing-room?
+
+FAT LADY. A boy--that high--who drank! I gave him a scolding at once.
+And he was grateful to me afterwards. They are children, and, as I
+always say, children need both love and severity!
+
+    Exeunt all, all talking together.
+
+    Tánya enters from behind the hangings.
+
+TÁNYA. Oh, if it would only succeed! [Begins fastening some threads].
+
+    Enter Betsy hurriedly.
+
+BETSY. Isn't papa here? [Looks inquiringly at Tánya] What are you doing
+here?
+
+TÁNYA. Oh, Miss Elizabeth, I have only just come; I only wished ... only
+came in ... [Embarrassed].
+
+BETSY. But they are going to have a séance here directly. [Notices Tánya
+drawing in the threads, looks at her, and suddenly bursts out laughing]
+Tánya! Why, it's you who do it all? Now don't deny it. And last time it
+was you too? Yes, it was, it was!
+
+TÁNYA. Miss Elizabeth, dearest!
+
+BETSY [delighted] Oh, that is a joke! Well, I never. But why do you do
+it?
+
+TÁNYA. Oh miss, dear miss, don't betray me!
+
+BETSY. Not for the world! I'm awfully glad. Only tell me how you manage
+it?
+
+TÁNYA. Well, I just hide, and then, when it's all dark, I come out and
+do it. That's how.
+
+BETSY [pointing to threads] And what is this for? You needn't tell me. I
+see; you draw ...
+
+TÁNYA. Miss Elizabeth, darling! I will confess it, but only to you. I
+used to do it just for fun, but now I mean business.
+
+BETSY. What? How? What business?
+
+TÁNYA. Well, you see, those peasants that came this morning, you saw
+them. They want to buy some land, and your father won't sell it; well,
+and Theodore Ivánitch, he says it's the spirits as forbid him. So I have
+had a thought as ...
+
+BETSY. Oh, I see! Well, you are a clever girl! Do it, do it.... But how
+will you manage it?
+
+TÁNYA. Well, I thought, when they put out the lights, I'll at once begin
+knocking and shying things about, touching their heads with the threads,
+and at last I'll take the paper about the land and throw it on the
+table. I've got it here.
+
+BETSY. Well, and then?
+
+TÁNYA. Why, don't you see? They will be astonished. The peasants had the
+paper, and now it's here. I will teach ...
+
+BETSY. Why, of course! Simon is the medium to-day!
+
+TÁNYA. Well, I'll teach him ... [Laughs so that she can't continue] I'll
+tell him to squeeze with his hands any one he can get hold of! Of
+course, not your father--he'd never dare do that--but any one else;
+he'll squeeze till it's signed.
+
+BETSY [laughing] But that's not the way it is done. Mediums never do
+anything themselves.
+
+TÁNYA. Oh, never mind. It's all one; I daresay it'll turn out all right.
+
+    Enter Theodore Ivánitch.
+
+    Exit Betsy, making signs to Tánya.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Why are you here?
+
+TÁNYA. It's you I want, Theodore Ivánitch, dear ...
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well, what is it?
+
+TÁNYA. About that affair of mine as I spoke of.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [laughs] I've made the match; yes, I've made the
+match. The matter is settled; we have shaken hands on it, only not had a
+drink on it.
+
+TÁNYA [with a shriek] Never! So it's all right?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Don't I tell you so? He says, "I shall consult the
+missus, and then, God willing ..."
+
+TÁNYA. Is that what he said? [Shrieks] Dear Theodore Ivánitch, I'll pray
+for you all the days of my life!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. All right! All right! Now is not the time. I've been
+ordered to arrange the room for the séance.
+
+TÁNYA. Let me help you. How's it to be arranged?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. How? Why, the table in the middle of the
+room--chairs--the guitar--the accordion. The lamp is not wanted, only
+candles.
+
+TÁNYA [helps Theodore Ivánitch to place the things] Is that right? The
+guitar here, and here the inkstand. [Places it] So?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Can it be true that they'll make Simon sit here?
+
+TÁNYA. I suppose so; they've done it once.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Wonderful! [Puts on his pince-nez] But is he clean?
+
+TÁNYA. How should I know?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Then, I'll tell you what ...
+
+TÁNYA. Yes, Theodore Ivánitch?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Go and take a nail-brush and some Pears' soap; you
+may take mine ... and go and cut his claws and scrub his hands as clean
+as possible.
+
+TÁNYA. He can do it himself.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well then, tell him to. And tell him to put on a
+clean shirt as well.
+
+TÁNYA. All right, Theodore Ivánitch. [Exit].
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [sits down in an easy-chair] They're educated and
+learned--Alexéy Vladímiritch now, he's a professor--and yet sometimes
+one can't help doubting very much. The people's rude superstitions are
+being abolished: hobgoblins, sorcerers, witches.... But if one considers
+it, is not this equally superstitious? How is it possible that the
+souls of the dead should come and talk, and play the guitar? No! Some
+one is fooling them, or they are fooling themselves. And as to this
+business with Simon--it's simply incomprehensible. [Looks at an album]
+Here's their spiritualistic album. How is it possible to photograph a
+spirit? But here is the likeness of a Turk and Leoníd Fyódoritch sitting
+by.... Extraordinary human weakness!
+
+    Enter Leoníd Fyódoritch.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Is it all ready?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [rising leisurely] Quite ready. [Smiles] Only I don't
+know about your new medium. I hope he won't disgrace you, Leoníd
+Fyódoritch.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. No, I and Alexéy Vladímiritch have tested him. He is
+a wonderfully powerful medium!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well, I don't know. But is he clean enough? I don't
+suppose you have thought of ordering him to wash his hands? It might be
+rather inconvenient.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. His hands? Oh yes! They're not clean, you think?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What can you expect? He's a peasant, and there will
+be ladies present, and Márya Vasílevna.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. It will be all right.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. And then I have something to report to you. Timothy,
+the coachman, complains that he can't keep things clean because of the
+dogs.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [arranging the things on the table absent-mindedly]
+What dogs?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. The three hounds that came for Vasíly Leoníditch
+to-day.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [vexed] Tell Anna Pávlovna! She can do as she likes
+about it. I have no time.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. But you know her weakness ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. 'Tis just as she likes, let her do as she pleases.
+As for him,--one never gets anything but unpleasantness from him.
+Besides, I am busy.
+
+    Enter Simon, smiling; he has a sleeveless peasant's coat on.
+
+SIMON. I was ordered to come.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, it's all right. Let me see your hands. That will
+do, that will do very well! Well then, my good fellow, you must do just
+as you did before,--sit down, and give way to your mood. But don't think
+at all.
+
+SIMON. Why should I think? The more one thinks, the worse it is.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Just so, just so, exactly! The less conscious one is,
+the greater is the power. Don't think, but give in to your mood. If you
+wish to sleep, sleep; if you wish to walk, walk. Do you understand?
+
+SIMON. How could one help understanding? It's simple enough.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. But above all, don't be frightened. Because you might
+be surprised yourself. You must understand that just as we live here, so
+a whole world of invisible spirits live here also.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [improving on what Leoníd Fyódoritch has said]
+Invisible feelings, do you understand?
+
+SIMON [laughs] How can one help understanding! It's very plain as you
+put it.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. You may rise up in the air, or something of the kind,
+but don't be frightened.
+
+SIMON. Why should I be frightened? That won't matter at all.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well then, I'll go and call them all.... Is
+everything ready?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I think so.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. But the slates?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. They are downstairs. I'll bring them. [Exit].
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. All right then. So don't be afraid, but be at your
+ease.
+
+SIMON. Had I not better take off my coat? One would be more easy like.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Your coat? Oh no. Don't take that off. [Exit].
+
+SIMON. She tells me to do the same again, and she will again shy things
+about. How isn't she afraid?
+
+    Enter Tánya in her stockings and in a dress of the colour of the
+    wall-paper. Simon laughs.
+
+TÁNYA. Shsh!... They'll hear! There, stick these matches on your fingers
+as before. [Sticks them on] Well, do you remember everything?
+
+SIMON [bending his fingers in, one by one] First of all, wet the matches
+and wave my hands about, that's one. Then make my teeth chatter, like
+this ... that's two. But I've forgotten the third thing.
+
+TÁNYA. And it's the third as is the chief thing. Don't forget as soon as
+the paper falls on the table--I shall ring the little bell--then you do
+like this.... Spread your arms out far and catch hold of some one,
+whoever it is as sits nearest, and catch hold of him. And then squeeze!
+[Laughs] Whether it's a gentleman or a lady, it's all one; you just
+squeeze 'em, and don't let 'em go,--as if it were in your sleep, and
+chatter with your teeth, or else howl like this. [Howls sotto-voce] And
+when I begin to play on the guitar, then stretch yourself as if you were
+waking up, you know.... Will you remember everything?
+
+SIMON. Yes, I'll remember, but it is too funny.
+
+TÁNYA. But mind you don't laugh. Still, it won't matter much if you do
+laugh; they'd think it was in your sleep. Only take care you don't
+really fall asleep when they put out the lights.
+
+SIMON. No fear, I'll pinch my ears.
+
+TÁNYA. Well then Sim darling, only mind do as I tell you, and don't get
+frightened. He'll sign the paper, see if he don't! They're coming!
+
+    Gets under the sofa.
+
+    Enter Grossman and the Professor, Leoníd Fyódoritch and the Fat
+    Lady, the Doctor, Sahátof and Anna Pávlovna. Simon stands near the
+    door.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Please come in, all you doubters! Though we have a
+new and accidentally discovered medium, I expect very important
+phenomena to-night.
+
+SAHÁTOF. That's very, very interesting.
+
+FAT LADY [pointing to Simon] _Mais il est très bien!_[12]
+
+  [12] FAT LADY. But he looks quite nice.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Yes, as a butler's assistant, but hardly ...
+
+SAHÁTOF. Wives never have any faith in their husbands' work. You don't
+believe in anything of this kind?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Of course not. Kaptchítch, it is true, has something
+exceptional about him, but Heaven knows what all this is about!
+
+FAT LADY. No, Anna Pávlovna, permit me, you can't decide it in such a
+way. Before I was married, I once had a remarkable dream. Dreams, you
+know, are often such that you don't know where they begin and where they
+end; it was just such a dream that I ...
+
+    Enter Vasíly Leoníditch and Petrístchef.
+
+FAT LADY. And much was revealed to me by that dream. Nowadays the young
+people [points to Petrístchef and Vasíly Leoníditch] deny everything.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. But look here, you know--now I, for instance, never
+deny anything! Eh, what?
+
+    Betsy and Márya Konstantínovna enter, and begin talking to
+    Petrístchef.
+
+FAT LADY. And how can one deny the supernatural? They say it is
+unreasonable. But what if one's reason is stupid; what then? There now,
+on Garden Street, you know ... why, well, it appeared every evening! My
+husband's brother--what do you call him? Not _beau-frère_--what's the
+other name for it?--I never can remember the names of these different
+relationships--well, he went there three nights running, and still he
+saw nothing; so I said to him ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, who is going to stay here?
+
+FAT LADY. I! I!
+
+SAHÁTOF. I.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [to Doctor] Do you mean to say you are going to stay?
+
+DOCTOR. Yes; I must see, if only once, what it is that Alexéy
+Vladímiritch has discovered in it. How can we deny anything without
+proofs?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Then I am to take it to-night for certain?
+
+DOCTOR. Take what?... Oh, the powder. Yes, it would perhaps be better.
+Yes, yes, take it.... However, I shall come upstairs again.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Yes please, do. [Loud] When it is over, _mesdames et
+messieurs_, I shall expect you to come to me upstairs to rest from your
+emotions, and then we will finish our rubber.
+
+FAT LADY. Oh, certainly.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Yes, thanks!
+
+    Exit Anna Pávlovna.
+
+BETSY [to Petrístchef] You must stay, I tell you. I promise you
+something extraordinary. Will you bet?
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA. But you don't believe in it?
+
+BETSY. To-day I do.
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA [to Petrístchef] And do you believe?
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. "I can't believe, I cannot trust a heart for falsehood
+framed." Still, if Elizabeth Leonídovna commands ...
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Let us stay, Márya Konstantínovna. Eh, what? I shall
+invent something _épâtant_.
+
+MÁRYA KONSTANTÍNOVNA. No, you mustn't make me laugh. You know I can't
+restrain myself.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH [loud] I remain!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [severely] But I beg those who remain not to joke
+about it. It is a serious matter.
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Do you hear? Well then, let's stay. Vovo, sit here, and
+don't be too shy.
+
+BETSY. Yes, it's all very well for you to laugh; but just wait till you
+see what will happen.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Oh, but supposing it's true? Won't it be a go! Eh,
+what?
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF [trembles] Oh, I'm afraid, I'm afraid! Márya Konstantínovna,
+I'm afraid! My tootsies tremble.
+
+BETSY [laughing] Not so loud.
+
+    All sit down.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Take your seats, take your seats. Simon, sit down!
+
+SIMON. Yes, sir. [Sits down on the edge of the chair].
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Sit properly.
+
+PROFESSOR. Sit straight in the middle of the chair, and quite at your
+ease. [Arranges Simon on his chair].
+
+    Betsy, Márya Konstantínovna and Vasíly Leoníditch laugh.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [raising his voice] I beg those who are going to
+remain here not to behave frivolously, but to regard this matter
+seriously, or bad results might follow. Do you hear, Vovo! If you can't
+be quiet, go away!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Quite quiet! [Hides behind Fat Lady].
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Alexéy Vladímiritch, will you mesmerise him?
+
+PROFESSOR. No; why should I do it when Antón Borísitch is here? He has
+had far more practice and has more power in that department than I....
+Antón Borísitch!
+
+GROSSMAN. Ladies and gentlemen, I am not, strictly speaking, a
+spiritualist. I have only studied hypnotism. It is true I have studied
+hypnotism in all its known manifestations; but what is called
+spiritualism, is entirely unknown to me. When a subject is thrown into a
+trance, I may expect the hypnotic phenomena known to me: lethargy,
+abulia, anæsthesia, analgesia, catalepsy, and every kind of
+susceptibility to suggestion. Here it is not these but other phenomena
+we expect to observe. Therefore it would be well to know of what kind
+are the phenomena we expect to witness, and what is their scientific
+significance.
+
+SAHÁTOF. I thoroughly agree with Mr. Grossman. Such an explanation would
+be very interesting.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. I think Alexéy Vladímiritch will not refuse to give
+us a short explanation.
+
+PROFESSOR. Why not? I can give an explanation if it is desired. [To the
+Doctor] Will you kindly note his temperature and pulse? My explanation
+must, of necessity, be cursory and brief.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, please; briefly, quite briefly.
+
+DOCTOR. All right. [Takes out thermometer] Now then, my lad ... [Places
+the thermometer].
+
+SIMON. Yes, sir!
+
+PROFESSOR [rising and addressing the Fat Lady--then reseating himself]
+Ladies and gentlemen! The phenomenon we are investigating to-night is
+regarded, on the one hand, as something new; and, on the other, as
+something transcending the limits of natural conditions. Neither view is
+correct. This phenomenon is not new but is as old as the world; and it
+is not supernatural but is subject to the eternal laws that govern all
+that exists. This phenomenon has been usually defined as "intercourse
+with the spirit world." That definition is inexact. Under such a
+definition the spirit world is contrasted with the material world. But
+this is erroneous; there is no such contrast! Both worlds are so closely
+connected that it is impossible to draw a line of demarcation,
+separating the one from the other. We say, matter is composed of
+molecules ...
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Prosy matter! [Whispering and laughter].
+
+PROFESSOR [pauses, then continues] Molecules are composed of atoms, but
+the atoms, having no extension, are in reality nothing but the points
+of application of forces. Strictly speaking, not of forces but of
+energy, that same energy which is as much a unity and just as
+indestructible as matter. But matter, though one, has many different
+aspects, and the same is true of energy. Till recently only four forms
+of energy, convertible into one another, have been known to us: energies
+known as the dynamic, the thermal, the electric, and the chemic. But
+these four aspects of energy are far from exhausting all the varieties
+of its manifestation. The forms in which energy may manifest itself are
+very diverse, and it is one of these new and as yet but little known
+phases of energy, that we are investigating to-night. I refer to
+mediumistic energy.
+
+    Renewed whispering and laughter among the young people.
+
+PROFESSOR [stops and casts a severe look round] Mediumistic energy has
+been known to mankind for ages: prophecy, presentiments, visions and so
+on, are nothing but manifestations of mediumistic energy. The
+manifestations produced by it have, I say, been known to mankind for
+ages. But the energy itself has not been recognised as such till quite
+recently--not till that medium, the vibrations of which cause the
+manifestations of mediumistic energy, was recognised. In the same way
+that the phenomena of light were inexplicable until the existence of an
+imponderable substance--an ether--was recognised, so mediumistic
+phenomena seemed mysterious until the now fully established fact was
+recognised, that between the particles of ether there exists another
+still more rarified imponderable substance not subject to the law of the
+three dimensions ...
+
+    Renewed laughter, whispers, and giggling.
+
+PROFESSOR [again looks round severely] And just as mathematical
+calculations have irrefutably proved the existence of imponderable ether
+which gives rise to the phenomena of light and electricity, so the
+successive investigations of the ingenious Hermann, of Schmidt, and of
+Joseph Schmatzhofen, have confirmed beyond a doubt the existence of a
+substance which fills the universe and may be called spiritual ether.
+
+FAT LADY. Ah, now I understand. I am so grateful ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, but Alexéy Vladímiritch, could you not ...
+condense it a little?
+
+PROFESSOR [not heeding the remark] And so, as I have just had the honour
+of mentioning to you, a succession of strictly scientific experiments
+have made plain to us the laws of mediumistic phenomena. These
+experiments have proved that, when certain individuals are plunged into
+a hypnotic state (a state differing from ordinary sleep only by the fact
+that man's physiological activity is not lowered by the hypnotic
+influence but, on the contrary, is always heightened--as we have
+recently witnessed) when, I say, any individual is plunged into such a
+state, this always produces certain perturbations in the spiritual
+ether--perturbations quite similar to those produced by plunging a solid
+body into liquid matter. These perturbations are what we call
+mediumistic phenomena ...
+
+    Laughter, and whispers.
+
+SAHÁTOF. That is quite comprehensible and correct; but if, as you are
+kind enough to inform us, the plunging of the medium into a trance
+produces perturbations of the spiritual ether, allow me to ask why (as
+is usually supposed to be the case in spiritualistic séances) these
+perturbations result in an activity on the part of the souls of dead
+people?
+
+PROFESSOR. It is because the molecules of this spiritual ether are
+nothing but the souls of the living, the dead, and the unborn, and any
+vibration of the spiritual ether must inevitably cause a certain
+vibration of its atoms. These atoms are nothing but human souls, which
+enter into communication with one another by means of these movements.
+
+FAT LADY [to Sahátof] What is it that puzzles you? It is so simple....
+Thank you so, so much!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. I think everything has now been explained, and that
+we may commence.
+
+DOCTOR. The fellow is in a perfectly normal condition: temperature 37
+decimal 2, pulse 74.
+
+PROFESSOR [takes out his pocket-book and notes this down] What I have
+just had the honour of explaining will be confirmed by the fact, which
+we shall presently have an opportunity of observing, that after the
+medium has been thrown into a trance his temperature and pulse will
+inevitably rise, just as occurs in cases of hypnotism.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, yes. But excuse me a moment. I should like to
+reply to Sergéy Ivánitch's question: How do we know we are in
+communication with the souls of the dead? We know it because the spirit
+that appears, plainly tells us--as simply as I am speaking to you--who
+he is, and why he has come, and whether all is well with him! At our
+last séance a Spaniard, Don Castillos, came to us, and he told us
+everything. He told us who he was, and when he died, and that he was
+suffering for having taken part in the Inquisition. He even told us what
+was happening to him at the very time that he was speaking to us,
+namely, that at the very time he was talking to us he had to be born
+again on earth, and, therefore, could not continue his conversation with
+us.... But you'll see for yourselves ...
+
+FAT LADY [interrupting] Oh, how interesting! Perhaps the Spaniard was
+born in one of our houses and is a baby now!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Quite possibly.
+
+PROFESSOR. I think it is time we began.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. I was only going to say ...
+
+PROFESSOR. It is getting late.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Very well. Then we will commence. Antón Borísitch, be
+so good as to hypnotise the medium.
+
+GROSSMAN. What method would you like me to use? There are several
+methods. There is Braid's system, there is the Egyptian symbol, and
+there is Charcot's system.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [to the Professor] I think it is quite immaterial.
+
+PROFESSOR. Quite.
+
+GROSSMAN. Then I will make use of my own method, which I showed in
+Odessa.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. If you please!
+
+    Grossman waves his arms above Simon. Simon closes his eyes and
+    stretches himself.
+
+GROSSMAN [looking closely at him] He is falling asleep! He is asleep! A
+remarkably rapid occurrence of hypnosis. The subject has evidently
+already reached a state of anæsthesia. He is remarkable,--an unusually
+impressionable subject, and might be subjected to interesting
+experiments!... [Sits down, rises, sits down again] Now one might run a
+needle into his arm. If you like ...
+
+PROFESSOR [to Leoníd Fyódoritch] Do you notice how the medium's trance
+acts on Grossman? He is beginning to vibrate.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, yes ... can the lights be extinguished now?
+
+SAHÁTOF. But why is darkness necessary?
+
+PROFESSOR. Darkness? Because it is a condition of the manifestation of
+mediumistic energy, just as a given temperature is a condition necessary
+for certain manifestations of chemical or dynamic energy.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. But not always. Manifestations have been observed by
+me, and by many others, both by candlelight and daylight.
+
+PROFESSOR [interrupting] May the lights be put out?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, certainly. [Puts out candles] Ladies and
+gentlemen! attention, if you please.
+
+    Tánya gets from under the sofa and takes hold of a thread tied to a
+    chandelier.
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. I like that Spaniard! Just in the midst of a
+conversation--off he goes head downwards ... as the French say: _piquer
+une tête_.[13]
+
+  [13] To take a header.
+
+BETSY. You just wait a bit, and see what will happen!
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. I have only one fear, and that is that Vovo may be moved by
+the spirit to grunt like a pig!
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Would you like me to? I will ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Gentlemen! Silence, if you please!
+
+    Silence. Simon licks the matches on his fingers and rubs his
+    knuckles with them.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. A light! Do you see the light?
+
+SAHÁTOF. A light? Yes, yes, I see; but allow me ...
+
+FAT LADY. Where? Where? Oh dear, I did not see it! Ah, there it is.
+Oh!...
+
+PROFESSOR [whispers to Leoníd Fyódoritch, and points to Grossman, who is
+moving] Do you notice how he vibrates? It is the dual influence. [The
+light appears again].
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [to the Professor] It must be he--you know!
+
+SAHÁTOF. Who?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. A Greek, Nicholas. It is his light. Don't you think
+so, Alexéy Vladímiritch?
+
+SAHÁTOF. Who is this Greek, Nicholas?
+
+PROFESSOR. A certain Greek, who was a monk at Constantinople under
+Constantine and who has been visiting us lately.
+
+FAT LADY. Where is he? Where is he? I don't see him.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. He is not yet visible ... Alexéy Vladímiritch, he is
+particularly well disposed towards you. You question him.
+
+PROFESSOR [in a peculiar voice] Nicholas! Is that you?
+
+    Tánya raps twice on the wall.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [joyfully] It is he! It is he!
+
+FAT LADY. Oh dear! Oh! I shall go away!
+
+SAHÁTOF. Why do you suppose it is he?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Why, the two knocks. It is an affirmative answer;
+else all would have been silence.
+
+    Silence. Suppressed giggling in the young people's corner. Tánya
+    throws a lampshade, pencil and penwiper upon the table.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [whispers] Do you notice, gentlemen, here is a
+lamp-shade, and something else--a pencil!... Alexéy Vladímiritch, it is
+a pencil!
+
+PROFESSOR. All right, all right! I am watching both him and Grossman!
+
+    Grossman rises and feels the things that have fallen on the table.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Excuse me, excuse me! I should like to see whether it is not
+the medium who is doing it all himself?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Do you think so? Well, sit by him and hold his hands.
+But you may be sure he is asleep.
+
+SAHÁTOF [approaches. Tánya lets a thread touch his head. He is
+frightened, and stoops]. Ye ... ye ... yes! Strange, very strange!
+[Takes hold of Simon's elbow. Simon howls].
+
+PROFESSOR [to Leoníd Fyódoritch] Do you notice the effect of Grossman's
+presence? It is a new phenomenon--I must note it ... [Runs out to note
+it down, and returns again].
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes.... But we cannot leave Nicholas without an
+answer. We must begin ...
+
+GROSSMAN [rises, approaches Simon and raises and lowers his arm] It
+would be interesting to produce contraction! The subject is in profound
+hypnosis.
+
+PROFESSOR [to Leoníd Fyódoritch] Do you see? Do you see?
+
+GROSSMAN. If you like ...
+
+DOCTOR. Now then, my dear sir, leave the management to Alexéy
+Vladímiritch, the affair is turning out serious.
+
+PROFESSOR. Leave him alone, he [referring to Grossman] is talking in his
+sleep!
+
+FAT LADY. How glad I now am that I resolved to be present! It is
+frightening, but all the same I am glad, for I always said to my
+husband ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Silence, if you please.
+
+    Tánya draws a thread over the Fat Lady's head.
+
+FAT LADY. Aie!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. What? What is it?
+
+FAT LADY. He took hold of my hair!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [whispers] Never mind, don't be afraid, give him your
+hand. His hand will be cold, but I like it.
+
+FAT LADY [hides her hands] Not for the world!
+
+SAHÁTOF. Yes, it is strange, very strange!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. He is here and is seeking for intercourse. Who wishes
+to put a question to him?
+
+SAHÁTOF. I should like to put a question, if I may.
+
+PROFESSOR. Please do.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Do I believe or not?
+
+    Tánya knocks twice.
+
+PROFESSOR. The answer is affirmative.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Allow me to ask again. Have I a ten rouble note in my pocket?
+
+    Tánya knocks several times and passes a thread over Sahátof's head.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Ah! [Seizes the thread and breaks it].
+
+PROFESSOR. I should ask those present not to ask indefinite or trivial
+questions. It is unpleasant to _him_!
+
+SAHÁTOF. No, but allow me! Here I have a thread in my hand!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. A thread? Hold it fast; that happens often, and not
+only threads but sometimes even silk cords--very ancient ones!
+
+SAHÁTOF. No--but where did this thread come from?
+
+    Tánya throws a cushion at him.
+
+SAHÁTOF. Wait a bit; wait! Something soft has hit me on the head. Light
+a candle--there is something ...
+
+PROFESSOR. We beg of you not to interrupt the manifestations.
+
+FAT LADY. For goodness' sake don't interrupt! I should also like to ask
+something. May I?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, if you like.
+
+FAT LADY. I should like to ask about my digestion. May I? I want to know
+what to take: aconite or belladonna?
+
+    Silence, whispers among the young people; suddenly Vasíly Leoníditch
+    begins to cry like a baby: "ou-a, ou-a!" [Laughter.] Holding their
+    mouths and noses, the girls and Petrístchef run away bursting with
+    laughter.
+
+FAT LADY. Ah, that must be the monk who's been born again!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [beside himself with anger, whispers] One gets nothing
+but tomfoolery from you! If you don't know how to behave decently, go
+away!
+
+    Exit Vasíly Leoníditch. Darkness and silence.
+
+FAT LADY. Oh, what a pity! Now one can't ask any more! He is born!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Not at all. It is only Vovo's nonsense. But _he_ is
+here. Ask him.
+
+PROFESSOR. That often happens. These jokes and ridicule are quite usual
+occurrences. I expect _he_ is still here. But we may ask. Leoníd
+Fyódoritch, will you?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. No, you, if you please. This has upset me. So
+unpleasant! Such want of tact!...
+
+PROFESSOR. Very well.... Nicholas, are you here?
+
+    Tánya raps twice and rings. Simon roars, spreads his arms out,
+    seizes Sahátof and the Professor--squeezing them.
+
+PROFESSOR. What an unexpected phenomenon! The medium himself reacted
+upon! This never happened before! Leoníd Fyódoritch, will you watch? It
+is difficult for me to do so. He squeezes me so! Mind you observe
+Grossman! This needs the very greatest attention!
+
+    Tánya throws the peasants' paper on the table.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Something has fallen upon the table.
+
+PROFESSOR. See what it is!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Paper! A folded paper!
+
+    Tánya throws a travelling inkstand on the table.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. An inkstand!
+
+    Tánya throws a pen.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. A pen!
+
+    Simon roars and squeezes.
+
+PROFESSOR [crushed] Wait a bit, wait: a totally new manifestation! The
+action proceeding not from the mediumistic energy produced, but from the
+medium himself! However, open the inkstand, and put the pen on the
+table, and _he_ will write!
+
+    Tánya goes behind Leoníd Fyódoritch and strikes him on the head with
+    the guitar.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. He has struck me on the head! [Examining table] The
+pen is not writing yet and the paper remains folded.
+
+PROFESSOR. See what the paper is, and quickly; evidently the dual
+influence--his and Grossman's--has produced a perturbation!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [goes out and returns at once] Extraordinary! This
+paper is an agreement with some peasants that I refused to sign this
+morning and returned to the peasants. Probably _he_ wants me to sign it?
+
+PROFESSOR. Of course! Of course! But ask him.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Nicholas, do you wish ...
+
+    Tánya knocks twice.
+
+PROFESSOR. Do you hear? It is quite evident!
+
+    Leoníd Fyódoritch takes the paper and pen and goes out. Tánya
+    knocks, plays on the guitar and the accordion, and then creeps under
+    the sofa. Leoníd Fyódoritch returns. Simon stretches himself and
+    coughs.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. He is waking up. We can light the candles.
+
+PROFESSOR [hurriedly] Doctor, Doctor, please, his pulse and temperature!
+You will see that a rise of both will be apparent.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [lights the candles] Well, what do you gentlemen who
+were sceptical think of it now?
+
+DOCTOR [goes up to Simon and places thermometer] Now then my lad. Well,
+have you had a nap? There, put that in there, and give me your hand.
+[Looks at his watch].
+
+SAHÁTOF [shrugging his shoulders] I must admit that all that has
+occurred cannot have been done by the medium. But the thread?... I
+should like the thread explained.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. A thread! A thread! We have been witnessing
+manifestations more important than a thread.
+
+SAHÁTOF. I don't know. At all events, _je réserve mon opinion_.
+
+FAT LADY [to Sahátof] Oh no, how can you say: "_je réserve mon
+opinion?_" And the infant with the little wings? Didn't you see? At
+first I thought it was only an illusion, but afterwards it became
+clearer and clearer, like a live ...
+
+SAHÁTOF. I can only speak of what I have seen. I did not see
+that--nothing of the kind.
+
+FAT LADY. You don't mean to say so? Why, it was quite plainly visible!
+And to the left there was a monk clothed in black bending over it ...
+
+SAHÁTOF [moves away. Aside] What exaggeration!
+
+FAT LADY [addressing the Doctor] You must have seen it! It rose up from
+your side.
+
+    Doctor goes on counting pulse without heeding her.
+
+FAT LADY [to Grossman] And that light, the light around it, especially
+around its little face! And the expression so mild and tender, something
+so heavenly! [Smiles tenderly herself].
+
+GROSSMAN. I saw phosphorescent light, and objects changed their places,
+but I saw nothing more than that.
+
+FAT LADY. Don't tell me! You don't mean it! It is simply that you
+scientists of Charcot's school do not believe in a life beyond the
+grave! As for me, no one could now make me disbelieve in a future
+life--no one in the world!
+
+    Grossman moves away from her.
+
+FAT LADY. No, no, whatever you may say, this is one of the happiest
+moments of my life! When I heard Sarasate play, and now.... Yes! [No one
+listens to her. She goes up to Simon] Now tell me, my friend, what did
+you feel? Was it very trying?
+
+SIMON [laughs] Yes, ma'm, just so.
+
+FAT LADY. Still not unendurable?
+
+SIMON. Just so, ma'm. [To Leoníd Fyódoritch] Am I to go?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, you may go.
+
+DOCTOR [to the Professor] The pulse is the same, but the temperature is
+lower.
+
+PROFESSOR. Lower! [Considers awhile, then suddenly divines the
+conclusion] It had to be so--it had to descend! The dual influence
+crossing had to produce some kind of reflex action. Yes, that's it!
+
+    Exeunt, all talking at once.
+
+  { LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. I'm only sorry we had no complete
+  { materialisation. But still.... Come, gentlemen, let us go to the
+  { drawing-room?
+  {
+  { FAT LADY. What specially struck me was when he flapped his wings,
+  { and one saw how he rose!
+  {
+  { GROSSMAN [to Sahátof] If we had kept to hypnotism, we might have
+  { produced a thorough state of epilepsy. The success might have been
+  { complete!
+  {
+  { SAHÁTOF. It is very interesting, but not entirely convincing. That
+  { is all I can say.
+
+    Enter Theodore Ivánitch.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [with paper in his hand] Ah, Theodore, what a
+remarkable séance we have had! It turns out that the peasants must have
+the land on their own terms.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Dear me!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, indeed. [Showing paper] Fancy, this paper that I
+returned to them, suddenly appeared on the table! I have signed it.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. How did it get there?
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, it did get there! [Exit, Theodore Ivánitch
+follows him out].
+
+TÁNYA [gets from under the sofa and laughs] Oh dear, oh dear! Well, I
+did get a fright when he got hold of the thread! [Shrieks] Well, anyhow,
+it's all right--he has signed it!
+
+    Enter Gregory.
+
+GREGORY. So it was you that was fooling them?
+
+TÁNYA. What business is it of yours?
+
+GREGORY. And do you think the missis will be pleased with you for it?
+No, you bet; you're caught now! I'll tell them what tricks you're up to,
+if you don't let me have my way!
+
+TÁNYA. And you'll not get your way, and you'll not do me any harm!
+
+
+                                Curtain.
+
+
+
+
+ACT IV
+
+    The same scene as in Act I. The next day. Two liveried footmen,
+    Theodore Ivánitch and Gregory.
+
+
+FIRST FOOTMAN [with grey whiskers] Yours is the third house to-day.
+Thank goodness that all the at-homes are in this direction. Yours used
+to be on Thursdays.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes, we changed to Saturday so as to be on the same
+day as the Golóvkins and Grade von Grabes ...
+
+SECOND FOOTMAN. The Stcherbákofs do the thing well. There's refreshments
+for the footmen every time they've a ball.
+
+    The two Princesses, mother and daughter, come down the stairs
+    accompanied by Betsy. The old Princess looks in her note-book and at
+    her watch, and sits down on the settle. Gregory puts on her
+    overshoes.
+
+YOUNG PRINCESS. Now, do come. Because, if you refuse, and Dodo refuses,
+the whole thing will be spoilt.
+
+BETSY. I don't know. I must certainly go to the Shoúbins. And then there
+is the rehearsal.
+
+YOUNG PRINCESS. You'll have plenty of time. Do, please. _Ne nous fais
+pas faux bond._[14] Fédya and Koko will come.
+
+  [14] Do not disappoint us.
+
+BETSY. _J'en ai par-dessus la tête de votre Koko._[15]
+
+  [15] BETSY. I have more than enough of your Koko.
+
+YOUNG PRINCESS. I thought I should see him here. _Ordinairement il est
+d'une exactitude ..._[16]
+
+  [16] YOUNG PRINCESS. ... He is usually so very punctual ...
+
+BETSY. He is sure to come.
+
+YOUNG PRINCESS. When I see you together, it always seems to me that he
+has either just proposed or is just going to propose.
+
+BETSY. Yes, I don't suppose it can be avoided. I shall have to go
+through with it. And it is so unpleasant!
+
+YOUNG PRINCESS. Poor Koko! He is head over ears in love.
+
+BETSY. _Cessez, les gens!_[17]
+
+  [17] BETSY. Cease; mind the servants!
+
+    Young Princess sits down, talking in whispers. Gregory puts on her
+    overshoes.
+
+YOUNG PRINCESS. Well then, good-bye till this evening.
+
+BETSY. I'll try to come.
+
+OLD PRINCESS. Then tell your papa that I don't believe in anything of
+the kind, but will come to see his new medium. Only he must let me know
+when. Good afternoon, _ma toute belle_. [Kisses Betsy, and exit,
+followed by her daughter. Betsy goes upstairs].
+
+GREGORY. I don't like putting on an old woman's overshoes for her; she
+can't stoop, can't see her shoe for her stomach, and keeps poking her
+foot in the wrong place. It's different with a young one; it's pleasant
+to take her foot in one's hand.
+
+SECOND FOOTMAN. Hear him! Making distinctions!
+
+FIRST FOOTMAN. It's not for us footmen to make such distinctions.
+
+GREGORY. Why shouldn't one make distinctions; are we not men? It's they
+think we don't understand! Just now they were deep in their talk, then
+they look at me, and at once it's "lay zhon!"
+
+SECOND FOOTMAN. And what's that?
+
+GREGORY. Oh, that means, "Don't talk, they understand!" It's the same at
+table. But I understand! You say, there's a difference? I say there is
+none.
+
+FIRST FOOTMAN. There is a great difference for those who understand.
+
+GREGORY. There is none at all. To-day I am a footman, and to-morrow I
+may be living no worse than they are. Has it never happened that they've
+married footmen? I'll go and have a smoke. [Exit].
+
+SECOND FOOTMAN. That's a bold young man you've got.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. A worthless fellow, not fit for service. He used to
+be an office boy and has got spoilt. I advised them not to take him, but
+the mistress liked him. He looks well on the carriage when they drive
+out.
+
+FIRST FOOTMAN. I should like to send him to our Count; he'd put him in
+his place! Oh, he don't like those scatterbrains. "If you're a footman,
+be a footman and fulfil your calling." Such pride is not befitting.
+
+    Petrístchef comes running downstairs, and takes out a cigarette.
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF [deep in thought] Let's see, my second is the same as my
+first. Echo, a-co, co-coa. [Enter Koko Klíngen, wearing his pince-nez]
+Ko-ko, co-coa. Cocoa tin, where do you spring from?
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN. From the Stcherbákofs. You are always playing the fool ...
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. No, listen to my charade. My first is the same as my
+second, my third may be cracked, my whole is like your pate.
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN. I give it up. I've no time.
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Where else are you going?
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN. Where? Of course to the Ívins, to practise for the
+concert. Then to the Shoúbins, and then to the rehearsal. You'll be
+there too, won't you?
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Most certainly. At the re-her-Sall and also at the
+re-her-Sarah. Why, at first I was a savage, and now I am both a savage
+and a general.
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN. How did yesterday's séance go off?
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Screamingly funny! There was a peasant, and above all, it
+was all in the dark. Vovo cried like an infant, the Professor defined,
+and Márya Vasílevna refined. Such a lark! You ought to have been there.
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN. I'm afraid, _mon cher_. You have a way of getting off with
+a jest, but I always feel that if I say a word, they'll construe it into
+a proposal. _Et ça ne m'arrange pas du tout, du tout. Mais du tout, du
+tout!_[18]
+
+  [18] And that won't suit me at all, at all! Not at all, at all!
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Instead of a proposal, make a proposition, and receive a
+sentence! Well, I shall go in to Vovo's. If you'll call for me, we can
+go to the re-her-Sarah together.
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN. I can't think how you can be friends with such a fool. He
+is so stupid,--a regular blockhead!
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. And I am fond of him. I love Vovo, but ... "with a love so
+strange, ne'er towards him the path untrod shall be" ... [Exit into
+Vovo's room].
+
+    Betsy comes down with a Lady. Koko bows significantly to Betsy.
+
+BETSY [shaking Koko's hand without turning towards him. To Lady] You are
+acquainted?
+
+LADY. No.
+
+BETSY. Baron Klíngen.... Why were you not here last night?
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN. I could not come, I was engaged.
+
+BETSY. What a pity, it was so interesting! [Laughs] You should have seen
+what manifestations we had! Well, how is our charade getting on?
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN. Oh, the verses for _mon second_ are ready. Nick composed
+the verses, and I the music.
+
+BETSY. What are they? What are they? Do tell me!
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN. Wait a minute; how does it go?... Oh, the knight sings:
+
+        "Oh, _naught_ so beautiful as nature:
+         The _Nautilus_ sails by.
+         Oh, _naughty_ lass, oh, _naughty_ lass!
+         Oh, _nought_, oh _nought_! Oh fie!"
+
+LADY. I see, my second is "nought," and what is my first?
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN. My first is _Aero_, the name of a girl savage.
+
+BETSY. _Aero_, you see, is a savage who wished to devour the object of
+her love. [Laughs] She goes about lamenting, and sings--
+
+        "My appetite,"
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN [interrupts]--
+
+        "How can I fight," ...
+
+BETSY [chimes in]--
+
+        "Some one to chew I long.
+         I seeking go ..."
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN--
+
+        "But even so ..."
+
+BETSY--
+
+        "No one to chew can find."
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN--
+
+        "A raft sails by,"
+
+BETSY--
+
+        "It cometh nigh;
+         Two generals upon it ..."
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN--
+
+        "Two generals are we:
+         By fate's hard decree,
+         To this island we flee."
+
+And then, the refrain--
+
+        "By fate's hard decree,
+         To this island we flee."
+
+LADY. _Charmant!_
+
+BETSY. But just think how silly!
+
+KOKO KLÍNGEN. Yes, that's the charm of it!
+
+LADY. And who is to be Aero?
+
+BETSY. I am. And I have had a costume made, but mamma says it's "not
+decent." And it is not a bit less decent than a ball dress. [To Theodore
+Ivánitch] Is Bourdier's man here?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes, he is waiting in the kitchen.
+
+LADY. Well, and how will you represent Aeronaut?
+
+BETSY. Oh, you'll see. I don't want to spoil the pleasure for you. _Au
+revoir._
+
+LADY. Good-bye! [They bow. Exit Lady].
+
+BETSY [to Koko Klíngen] Come up to mamma.
+
+    Betsy and Koko go upstairs. Jacob enters from servants' quarters,
+    carrying a tray with teacups, cakes, &c., and goes panting across
+    the stage.
+
+JACOB [to the Footmen] How d'you do? How d'you do? [Footmen bow].
+
+JACOB [to Theodore Ivánitch] Couldn't you tell Gregory to help a bit!
+I'm ready to drop.... [Exit up the stairs].
+
+FIRST FOOTMAN. That is a hard-working chap you've got there.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes, a good fellow. But there now--he doesn't satisfy
+the mistress, she says his appearance is ungainly. And now they've gone
+and told tales about him for letting some peasants into the kitchen
+yesterday. It is a bad look-out: they may dismiss him. And he is a good
+fellow.
+
+SECOND FOOTMAN. What peasants were they?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Peasants that had come from our Koursk village to buy
+some land. It was night, and they were our fellow-countrymen, one of
+them the father of the butler's assistant. Well, so they were asked into
+the kitchen. It so happened that there was thought-reading going on.
+Something was hidden in the kitchen, and all the gentlefolk came down,
+and the mistress saw the peasants. There was such a row! "How is this,"
+she says; "these people may be infected, and they are let into the
+kitchen!" ... She is terribly afraid of this infection.
+
+    Enter Gregory.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Gregory, you go and help Jacob. I'll stay here. He
+can't manage alone.
+
+GREGORY. He's awkward, that's why he can't manage. [Exit].
+
+FIRST FOOTMAN. And what is this new mania they have got? This
+infection!... So yours also is afraid of it?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. She fears it worse than fire! Our chief business,
+nowadays, is fumigating, washing, and sprinkling.
+
+FIRST FOOTMAN. I see. That's why there is such a stuffy smell here.
+[With animation] I don't know what we're coming to with these infection
+notions. It's just detestable! They seem to have forgotten the Lord.
+There's our master's sister, Princess Mosolóva, her daughter was dying
+and, will you believe it, neither father nor mother would come near her!
+So she died without their having taken leave of her. And the daughter
+cried, and called them to say good-bye--but they didn't go! The doctor
+had discovered some infection or other! And yet their own maid and a
+trained nurse were with her, and nothing happened to them; they're still
+alive!
+
+    Enter Vasíly Leoníditch and Petrístchef from Vasíly Leoníditch's
+    room, smoking cigarettes.
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Come along then, only I must take Koko--Cocoanut, with me.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Your Koko is a regular dolt; I can't bear him. A
+hare-brained fellow, a regular gad-about! Without any kind of
+occupation, eternally loafing around! Eh, what?
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Well, anyhow, wait a bit, I must say good-bye.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. All right. And I will go and look at my dogs in the
+coachman's room. I've got a dog there that's so savage, the coachman
+said, he nearly ate him.
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Who ate whom? Did the coachman really eat the dog?
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. You are always at it! [Puts on outdoor things and
+goes out].
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF [thoughtfully] Ma-kin-tosh, Co-co-tin.... Let's see. [Goes
+upstairs].
+
+    Jacob runs across the stage.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What's the matter?
+
+JACOB. There is no more thin bread and butter. I said ... [Exit].
+
+SECOND FOOTMAN. And then our master's little son fell ill, and they sent
+him at once to an hotel with his nurse, and there he died without his
+mother.
+
+FIRST FOOTMAN. They don't seem to fear sin! _I_ think you cannot escape
+from God anywhere.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. That's what I think.
+
+    Jacob runs upstairs with bread and butter.
+
+FIRST FOOTMAN. One should consider too, that if we are to be afraid of
+everybody like that, we'd better shut ourselves up within four walls, as
+in a prison, and stick there!
+
+    Enter Tánya; she bows to the Footmen.
+
+TÁNYA. Good afternoon.
+
+    Footmen bow.
+
+TÁNYA. Theodore Ivánitch, I have a word to say to you.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well, what?
+
+TÁNYA. The peasants have come again, Theodore Ivánitch ...
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well? I gave the paper to Simon.
+
+TÁNYA. I have given them the paper. They were that grateful! I can't say
+how! Now they only ask you to take the money.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. But where are they?
+
+TÁNYA. Here, by the porch.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. All right, I'll tell the master.
+
+TÁNYA. I have another request to you, dear Theodore Ivánitch.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What now?
+
+TÁNYA. Why, don't you see, Theodore Ivánitch, I can't remain here any
+longer. Ask them to let me go.
+
+    Enter Jacob, running.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [to Jacob] What d'you want?
+
+JACOB. Another samovár, and oranges.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Ask the housekeeper.
+
+    Exit Jacob.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [to Tánya] How is that?
+
+TÁNYA. Why, don't you see, my position is such ...
+
+JACOB [runs in] There are not enough oranges.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Serve up as many as you've got [Exit Jacob]. Now's
+not the time! Just see what a bustle we are in.
+
+TÁNYA. But you know yourself, Theodore Ivánitch, there is no end to this
+bustle; one might wait for ever--you know yourself--and my affair is for
+life.... Dear Theodore Ivánitch, you have done me a good turn, be a
+father to me now, choose the right moment and tell her, or else she'll
+get angry and won't let me have my passport.[19]
+
+  [19] Employers have charge of the servants' passports, and in this way
+  have a hold on them in case of misconduct.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Where's the hurry?
+
+TÁNYA. Why, Theodore Ivánitch, it's all settled now.... And I could go
+to my godmother's and get ready, and then after Easter we'd get
+married.[20] Do tell her, dear Theodore Ivánitch!
+
+  [20] See footnote, p. 28. It is customary for peasants to marry just
+  after Easter, but when spring has come and the field work begun, no
+  marriages take place among them till autumn.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Go away--this is not the place.
+
+    An elderly Gentleman comes downstairs, puts on overcoat, and goes
+    out followed by the Second Footman.
+
+    Exit Tánya. Enter Jacob.
+
+JACOB. Just fancy, Theodore Ivánitch, it's too bad! She wants to
+discharge me now! She says, "You break everything, and forget Frisk, and
+you let the peasants into the kitchen against my orders!" And you know
+very well that I knew nothing about it. Tatyána told me, "Take them into
+the kitchen"; how could I tell whose order it was?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Did the mistress speak to you?
+
+JACOB. She's just spoken. Do speak up for me, Theodore Ivánitch! You
+see, my people in the country are only just getting on their feet, and
+suppose I lose my place, when shall I get another? Theodore Ivánitch,
+do, please!
+
+    Anna Pávlovna comes down with the old Countess, whom she is seeing
+    off. The Countess has false teeth and hair. The First Footman helps
+    the Countess into her outdoor things.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Oh, most certainly, of course! I am so deeply touched.
+
+COUNTESS. If it were not for my illness, I should come oftener to see
+you.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. You should really consult Peter Petróvitch. He is rough,
+but nobody can soothe one as he does. He is so clear, so simple.
+
+COUNTESS. Oh no, I shall keep to the one I am used to.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Pray, take care of yourself.
+
+COUNTESS. _Merci, mille fois merci._[21]
+
+  [21] COUNTESS. Thank you (for your hospitality), a thousand thanks.
+
+    Gregory, dishevelled and excited, jumps out from the servants'
+    quarters. Simon appears behind him in the doorway.
+
+SIMON. You'd better leave her alone!
+
+GREGORY. You rascal! I'll teach you how to fight, you scamp, you!
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. What do you mean? Do you think you are in a public-house?
+
+GREGORY. This coarse peasant makes life impossible for me.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [provoked] You've lost your senses. Don't you see? [To
+Countess] _Merci, mille fois merci. A mardi!_[22]
+
+  [22] ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Thank you (for coming to see us), a thousand
+  thanks. Till next Tuesday!
+
+    Exeunt Countess and First Footman.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [to Gregory] What is the meaning of this?
+
+GREGORY. Though I do occupy the position of a footman, still I won't
+allow every peasant to hit me; I have my pride too.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Why, what has happened?
+
+GREGORY. Why, this Simon of yours has got so brave, sitting with the
+gentlemen, that he wants to fight!
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Why? What for?
+
+GREGORY. Heaven only knows!
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [to Simon] What is the meaning of it?
+
+SIMON. Why does he bother her?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. What has happened?
+
+SIMON [smiles] Well, you see, he is always catching hold of Tánya, the
+lady's-maid, and she won't have it. Well, so I just moved him aside a
+bit, just so, with my hand.
+
+GREGORY. A nice little bit! He's almost caved my ribs in, and has torn
+my dress-coat, and he says, "The same power as came over me yesterday
+comes on me again," and he begins to squeeze me.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [to Simon] How dare you fight in my house?
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. May I explain it to you, ma'am? I must tell you Simon
+is not indifferent to Tánya, and is engaged to her. And Gregory--one
+must admit the truth--does not behave properly, nor honestly, to her.
+Well, so I suppose Simon got angry with him.
+
+GREGORY. Not at all! It is all his spite, because I have discovered
+their trickery.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. What trickery?
+
+GREGORY. Why, at the séance. All those things, last night,--it was not
+Simon but Tánya who did them! I saw her getting out from under the sofa
+with my own eyes.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. What is that? From under the sofa?
+
+GREGORY. I give you my word of honour. And it was she who threw the
+paper on the table. If it had not been for her the paper would not have
+been signed, nor the land sold to the peasants.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. And you saw it yourself?
+
+GREGORY. With my own eyes. Shall I call her? She'll not deny it.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Yes, call her.
+
+    Exit Gregory.
+
+    Noise behind the scenes. The voice of the Doorkeeper, "No, no, you
+    cannot." Doorkeeper is seen at the front door, the three Peasants
+    rush in past him, the Second Peasant first; the Third one stumbles,
+    falls on his nose, and catches hold of it.
+
+DOORKEEPER. You must not go in!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Where's the harm? We are not doing anything wrong. We
+only wish to pay the money!
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it; as by laying on the signature the affair
+is come to a conclusion, we only wish to make payment with thanks.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Wait a bit with your thanks. It was all done by fraud! It
+is not settled yet. Not sold yet.... Leoníd.... Call Leoníd Fyódoritch.
+[Exit Doorkeeper].
+
+    Leoníd Fyódoritch enters, but, seeing his wife and the Peasants,
+    wishes to retreat.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. No, no, come here, please! I told you the land must not
+be sold on credit, and everybody told you so, but you let yourself be
+deceived like the veriest blockhead.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. How? I don't understand who is deceiving?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. You ought to be ashamed of yourself! You have grey hair,
+and you let yourself be deceived and laughed at like a silly boy. You
+grudge your son some three hundred roubles which his social position
+demands, and let yourself be tricked of thousands--like a fool!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Now come, Annette, try to be calm.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. We are only come about the acceptation of the sum, for
+example ...
+
+THIRD PEASANT [taking out the money] Let us finish the matter, for
+Christ's sake!
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Wait, wait!
+
+    Enter Tánya and Gregory.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [angrily] You were in the small drawing-room during the
+séance last night?
+
+    Tánya looks round at Theodore Ivánitch, Leoníd Fyódoritch, and
+    Simon, and sighs.
+
+GREGORY. It's no use beating about the bush; I saw you myself ...
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Tell me, were you there? I know all about it, so you'd
+better confess! I'll not do anything to you. I only want to expose him
+[pointing to Leoníd Fyódoritch] your master.... Did you throw the paper
+on the table?
+
+TÁNYA. I don't know how to answer. Only one thing,--let me go home.
+
+    Enter Betsy unobserved.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [to Leoníd Fyódoritch] There, you see! You are being made
+a fool of.
+
+  [Illustration: FRUITS OF CULTURE. ACT IV.
+
+  ANNA PÁVLOVNA. There, you see! You are being made a fool of.]
+
+TÁNYA. Let me go home, Anna Pávlovna!
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. No, my dear! You may have caused us a loss of thousands
+of roubles. Land has been sold that ought not to be sold!
+
+TÁNYA. Let me go, Anna Pávlovna!
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. No; you'll have to answer for it! Such tricks won't do.
+We'll have you up before the Justice of the Peace!
+
+BETSY [comes forward] Let her go, mamma. Or, if you wish to have her
+tried, you must have me tried too! She and I did it together.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Well, of course, if _you_ have a hand in anything, what
+can one expect but the very worst results!
+
+    Enter the Professor.
+
+PROFESSOR. How do you do, Anna Pávlovna? How do you do, Miss Betsy?
+Leoníd Fyódoritch, I have brought you a report of the Thirteenth
+Congress of Spiritualists at Chicago. An amazing speech by Schmidt!
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Oh, that is interesting!
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. I will tell you something much more interesting! It turns
+out that both you and my husband were fooled by this girl! Betsy takes
+it on herself, but that is only to annoy me. It was an illiterate
+peasant girl who fooled you, and you believed it all. There were no
+mediumistic phenomena last night; it was she [pointing to Tánya] who did
+it!
+
+PROFESSOR [taking off his overcoat] What do you mean?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. I mean that it was she who, in the dark, played on the
+guitar and beat my husband on the head and performed all your idiotic
+tricks--and she has just confessed!
+
+PROFESSOR [smiling] What does that prove?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. It proves that your mediumism is--tomfoolery; that's what
+it proves!
+
+PROFESSOR. Because this young girl wished to deceive, we are to conclude
+that mediumism is "tomfoolery," as you are pleased to express it?
+[Smiles] A curious conclusion! Very possibly this young girl may have
+wished to deceive: that often occurs. She may even have done something;
+but then, what she did--_she_ did. But the manifestations of mediumistic
+energy still remain manifestations of _mediumistic_ energy! It is even
+very probable that what this young girl did, evoked (and so to say
+solicited) the manifestation of mediumistic energy,--giving it a
+definite form.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Another lecture!
+
+PROFESSOR [sternly] You say, Anna Pávlovna, that this girl, and perhaps
+this dear young lady also, did something; but the light we all saw, and,
+in the first case the fall, and in the second the rise of temperature,
+and Grossman's excitement and vibration--were those things also done by
+this girl? And these are facts, Anna Pávlovna, facts! No! Anna
+Pávlovna, there are things which must be investigated and fully
+understood before they can be talked about, things too serious, too
+serious ...
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. And the child that Márya Vasílevna distinctly saw?
+Why, I saw it too.... That could not have been done by this girl.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. You think yourself wise, but you are--a fool.
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, I'm going.... Alexéy Vladímiritch, will you
+come? [Exit into his study].
+
+PROFESSOR [shrugging his shoulders, follows] Oh, how far, how far, we
+still lag behind Western Europe!
+
+    Enter Jacob.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [following Leoníd Fyódoritch with her eyes] He has been
+tricked like a fool, and he sees nothing! [To Jacob] What do you want?
+
+JACOB. How many persons am I to lay the table for?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. For how many?... Theodore Ivánitch! Let him give up the
+silver plate to you. Be off, at once! It is all his fault! This man will
+bring me to my grave. Last night he nearly starved the dog that had done
+him no harm! And, as if that were not enough, he lets the infected
+peasants into the kitchen, and now they are here again! It is all his
+fault! Be off at once! Discharge him, discharge him! [To Simon] And you,
+horrid peasant, if you dare to have rows in my house again, I'll teach
+you!
+
+SECOND PEASANT. All right, if he is a horrid peasant there's no good
+keeping him; you'd better discharge him too, and there's an end of it.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA [while listening to him looks at Third Peasant] Only look!
+Why, he has a rash on his nose--a rash! He is ill; he is a hotbed of
+infection!! Did I not give orders, yesterday, that they were not to be
+allowed into the house, and here they are again? Drive them out!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Then are we not to accept their money?
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. Their money? Oh yes, take their money; but they must be
+turned out at once, especially this one! He is quite rotten!
+
+THIRD PEASANT. That's not just, lady. God's my witness, it's not just!
+You'd better ask my old woman, let's say, whether I am rotten! I'm clear
+as crystal, let's say.
+
+ANNA PÁVLOVNA. He talks!... Off, off with him! It's all to spite me!...
+Oh, I can't bear it, I can't!... Send for the doctor! [Runs away,
+sobbing. Exit also Jacob and Gregory].
+
+TÁNYA [to Betsy] Miss Elizabeth, darling, what am I to do now?
+
+BETSY. Never mind, you go with them and I'll arrange it all. [Exit].
+
+FIRST PEASANT. Well, your reverence, how about the reception of the sum
+now?
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Let us settle up, and go.
+
+THIRD PEASANT [fumbling with the packet of bank-notes] Had I known, I'd
+not have come for the world. It's worse than a fever!
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH [to Doorkeeper] Show them into my room. There's a
+counting-board there. I'll receive their money. Now go.
+
+DOORKEEPER. Come along.
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. And it's Tánya you have to thank for it. But for her
+you'd not have had the land.
+
+FIRST PEASANT. That's just it. As she made the proposal, so she put it
+into effect.
+
+THIRD PEASANT. She's made men of us. Else what were we? We had so little
+land, no room to let a hen out, let's say, not to mention the cattle.
+Good-bye, dear! When you get to the village, come to us and eat honey.
+
+SECOND PEASANT. Let me get home and I'll start brewing the beer for the
+wedding! You will come?
+
+TÁNYA. Yes, I'll come, I'll come! [Shrieks] Simon, this is fine, isn't
+it? [Exeunt Peasants].
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well, Tánya, when you have your house I'll come to
+visit you. Will you welcome me?
+
+TÁNYA. Dear Theodore Ivánitch, just the same as we would our own father!
+[Embraces and kisses him].
+
+
+                                Curtain.
+
+
+                      END OF "FRUITS OF CULTURE."
+
+
+
+
+[ Transcriber's Note:
+
+  The following is a list of corrections made to the original. The first
+  line is the original line, the second the corrected one.
+
+ALEXÉY VLADÍMIROVITCH KROUGOSVÉTLOF. A professor and scientist of about
+ALEXÉY VLADÍMIRITCH KROUGOSVÉTLOF. A professor and scientist of about
+
+THE FAT LADY: MÁRYA VASÍLYEVNA TOLBOÚHINA. A very distinguished, rich,
+THE FAT LADY: MÁRYA VASÍLEVNA TOLBOÚHINA. A very distinguished, rich,
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Nothing. I only say, get some at any cost I will wait.
+PETRÍSTCHEF. Nothing. I only say, get some at any cost. I will wait.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Then pay up and don't be stingy [To Theodore
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Then pay up and don't be stingy. [To Theodore
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. What d'you think, Theodore Ivanítch, is he flush of
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. What d'you think, Theodore Ivánitch, is he flush of
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I don't know. I hardly think so, But what does it
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I don't know. I hardly think so. But what does it
+
+COACHMAN. They'd better be brought here to Loukérya
+COACHMAN. They'd better be brought here to Loukérya.
+
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Excuse me a moment. [To Servants Cook] Where are the
+VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Excuse me a moment. [To Servants' Cook] Where are the
+
+do it out of spite. .. I turn them out from there, and they bring them
+do it out of spite.... I turn them out from there, and they bring them
+
+too!. . [Exit, sobbing, followed by Leoníd Fyódoritch].
+too!... [Exit, sobbing, followed by Leoníd Fyódoritch].
+
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Then, I'll tell you what . .
+THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Then, I'll tell you what ...
+
+PETRÍSTCHEF [trembles] Oh, I'm afraid, I'm afraid! Márya Konstantínova,
+PETRÍSTCHEF [trembles] Oh, I'm afraid, I'm afraid! Márya Konstantínovna,
+
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, it did get there! [Exit Theodore Ivánitch
+LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Well, it did get there! [Exit, Theodore Ivánitch
+
+        "A raft sails by,'
+        "A raft sails by,"
+]
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Fruits of Culture, by Leo Tolstoy
+
+*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK FRUITS OF CULTURE ***
+
+***** This file should be named 26663-8.txt or 26663-8.zip *****
+This and all associated files of various formats will be found in:
+        http://www.gutenberg.org/2/6/6/6/26663/
+
+Produced by Bryan Ness, Jana Srna and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions
+will be renamed.
+
+Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no
+one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation
+(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without
+permission and without paying copyright royalties.  Special rules,
+set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to
+copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to
+protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark.  Project
+Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you
+charge for the eBooks, unless you receive specific permission.  If you
+do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the
+rules is very easy.  You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose
+such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and
+research.  They may be modified and printed and given away--you may do
+practically ANYTHING with public domain eBooks.  Redistribution is
+subject to the trademark license, especially commercial
+redistribution.
+
+
+
+*** START: FULL LICENSE ***
+
+THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE
+PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK
+
+To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free
+distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work
+(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project
+Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project
+Gutenberg-tm License (available with this file or online at
+http://gutenberg.org/license).
+
+
+Section 1.  General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg-tm
+electronic works
+
+1.A.  By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm
+electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to
+and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property
+(trademark/copyright) agreement.  If you do not agree to abide by all
+the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy
+all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your possession.
+If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project
+Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the
+terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or
+entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8.
+
+1.B.  "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark.  It may only be
+used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who
+agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement.  There are a few
+things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works
+even without complying with the full terms of this agreement.  See
+paragraph 1.C below.  There are a lot of things you can do with Project
+Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement
+and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm electronic
+works.  See paragraph 1.E below.
+
+1.C.  The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the Foundation"
+or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project
+Gutenberg-tm electronic works.  Nearly all the individual works in the
+collection are in the public domain in the United States.  If an
+individual work is in the public domain in the United States and you are
+located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from
+copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative
+works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg
+are removed.  Of course, we hope that you will support the Project
+Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting free access to electronic works by
+freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm works in compliance with the terms of
+this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with
+the work.  You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by
+keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project
+Gutenberg-tm License when you share it without charge with others.
+
+1.D.  The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern
+what you can do with this work.  Copyright laws in most countries are in
+a constant state of change.  If you are outside the United States, check
+the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement
+before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or
+creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project
+Gutenberg-tm work.  The Foundation makes no representations concerning
+the copyright status of any work in any country outside the United
+States.
+
+1.E.  Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg:
+
+1.E.1.  The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate
+access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear prominently
+whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work on which the
+phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the phrase "Project
+Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed,
+copied or distributed:
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+1.E.2.  If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is derived
+from the public domain (does not contain a notice indicating that it is
+posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied
+and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees
+or charges.  If you are redistributing or providing access to a work
+with the phrase "Project Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the
+work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1
+through 1.E.7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the
+Project Gutenberg-tm trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or
+1.E.9.
+
+1.E.3.  If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted
+with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution
+must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any additional
+terms imposed by the copyright holder.  Additional terms will be linked
+to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works posted with the
+permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work.
+
+1.E.4.  Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm
+License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this
+work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm.
+
+1.E.5.  Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this
+electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without
+prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with
+active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project
+Gutenberg-tm License.
+
+1.E.6.  You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary,
+compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any
+word processing or hypertext form.  However, if you provide access to or
+distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format other than
+"Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official version
+posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site (www.gutenberg.org),
+you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a
+copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon
+request, of the work in its original "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other
+form.  Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg-tm
+License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1.
+
+1.E.7.  Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying,
+performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works
+unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9.
+
+1.E.8.  You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing
+access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works provided
+that
+
+- You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from
+     the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method
+     you already use to calculate your applicable taxes.  The fee is
+     owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he
+     has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the
+     Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation.  Royalty payments
+     must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you
+     prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax
+     returns.  Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and
+     sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the
+     address specified in Section 4, "Information about donations to
+     the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation."
+
+- You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies
+     you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he
+     does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm
+     License.  You must require such a user to return or
+     destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium
+     and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of
+     Project Gutenberg-tm works.
+
+- You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of any
+     money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the
+     electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days
+     of receipt of the work.
+
+- You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free
+     distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works.
+
+1.E.9.  If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg-tm
+electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set
+forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from
+both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and Michael
+Hart, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark.  Contact the
+Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below.
+
+1.F.
+
+1.F.1.  Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable
+effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread
+public domain works in creating the Project Gutenberg-tm
+collection.  Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm electronic
+works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain
+"Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or
+corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual
+property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a
+computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by
+your equipment.
+
+1.F.2.  LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right
+of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project
+Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project
+Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project
+Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all
+liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal
+fees.  YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT
+LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE
+PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH F3.  YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE
+TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE
+LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR
+INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH
+DAMAGE.
+
+1.F.3.  LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a
+defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can
+receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a
+written explanation to the person you received the work from.  If you
+received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with
+your written explanation.  The person or entity that provided you with
+the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a
+refund.  If you received the work electronically, the person or entity
+providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to
+receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund.  If the second copy
+is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further
+opportunities to fix the problem.
+
+1.F.4.  Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth
+in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS' WITH NO OTHER
+WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO
+WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTIBILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE.
+
+1.F.5.  Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied
+warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of damages.
+If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement violates the
+law of the state applicable to this agreement, the agreement shall be
+interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or limitation permitted by
+the applicable state law.  The invalidity or unenforceability of any
+provision of this agreement shall not void the remaining provisions.
+
+1.F.6.  INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the
+trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone
+providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in accordance
+with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the production,
+promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works,
+harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, including legal fees,
+that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following which you do
+or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this or any Project Gutenberg-tm
+work, (b) alteration, modification, or additions or deletions to any
+Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any Defect you cause.
+
+
+Section  2.  Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm
+
+Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of
+electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of computers
+including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers.  It exists
+because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations from
+people in all walks of life.
+
+Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the
+assistance they need, is critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's
+goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will
+remain freely available for generations to come.  In 2001, the Project
+Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure
+and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future generations.
+To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation
+and how your efforts and donations can help, see Sections 3 and 4
+and the Foundation web page at http://www.pglaf.org.
+
+
+Section 3.  Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive
+Foundation
+
+The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit
+501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the
+state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal
+Revenue Service.  The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification
+number is 64-6221541.  Its 501(c)(3) letter is posted at
+http://pglaf.org/fundraising.  Contributions to the Project Gutenberg
+Literary Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent
+permitted by U.S. federal laws and your state's laws.
+
+The Foundation's principal office is located at 4557 Melan Dr. S.
+Fairbanks, AK, 99712., but its volunteers and employees are scattered
+throughout numerous locations.  Its business office is located at
+809 North 1500 West, Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887, email
+business@pglaf.org.  Email contact links and up to date contact
+information can be found at the Foundation's web site and official
+page at http://pglaf.org
+
+For additional contact information:
+     Dr. Gregory B. Newby
+     Chief Executive and Director
+     gbnewby@pglaf.org
+
+
+Section 4.  Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg
+Literary Archive Foundation
+
+Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide
+spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of
+increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be
+freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest
+array of equipment including outdated equipment.  Many small donations
+($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt
+status with the IRS.
+
+The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating
+charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United
+States.  Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a
+considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up
+with these requirements.  We do not solicit donations in locations
+where we have not received written confirmation of compliance.  To
+SEND DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any
+particular state visit http://pglaf.org
+
+While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we
+have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition
+against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who
+approach us with offers to donate.
+
+International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make
+any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from
+outside the United States.  U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff.
+
+Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation
+methods and addresses.  Donations are accepted in a number of other
+ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations.
+To donate, please visit: http://pglaf.org/donate
+
+
+Section 5.  General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic
+works.
+
+Professor Michael S. Hart is the originator of the Project Gutenberg-tm
+concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared
+with anyone.  For thirty years, he produced and distributed Project
+Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support.
+
+
+Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed
+editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the U.S.
+unless a copyright notice is included.  Thus, we do not necessarily
+keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition.
+
+
+Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search facility:
+
+     http://www.gutenberg.org
+
+This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm,
+including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary
+Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to
+subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks.
diff --git a/26663-8.zip b/26663-8.zip
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..af40019
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-8.zip
diff --git a/26663-h.zip b/26663-h.zip
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..e79ce35
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-h.zip
diff --git a/26663-h/26663-h.htm b/26663-h/26663-h.htm
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..b9993c5
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-h/26663-h.htm
@@ -0,0 +1,6005 @@
+<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN"
+    "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd">
+
+<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" lang="en" xml:lang="en">
+  <head>
+    <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=iso-8859-1" />
+    <title>The Project Gutenberg eBook of Fruits of Culture, by Leo Tolstoy</title>
+    <style type="text/css">
+/*<![CDATA[  XML blockout */
+<!--
+	body { margin-left: 15%; margin-right: 15%; }
+
+	p { margin-top: .75em;
+	    text-align: justify;
+	    margin-bottom: .75em;
+	  }
+
+	h1, h2, h3 { text-align: center;
+	             clear: both;
+	             margin-top: 0em;
+	           }
+	h2 { margin-bottom: 1.5em; font-size: x-large; font-weight: normal; }
+	h3 { font-size: large; font-weight: normal; }
+	.new-h2 { margin-top: 6em; }
+	.new-h3 { margin-top: 3em; }
+
+	ins { text-decoration: none; border-bottom: 1px dashed #039; }
+
+	.scene     { font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 2em; }
+	.speaker   { font-size: 0.85em; font-style: normal; }
+	.curtain   { margin-top: 2.5em; }
+
+	.smcap { font-variant: small-caps; }
+
+	.center { text-align: center; }
+
+	.figcenter     { margin: 2em auto 2em auto; text-align: center; }
+	.figcenter img { border: 2px solid black; }
+	.caption       { text-align: center; line-height: 1.5em; margin-top: 0.5em; }
+
+	.pagenum { position: absolute;
+	           display: inline;
+	           right: 8%;
+	           font-size: x-small;
+	           text-align: right;
+	           color: #808080;
+	           font-style: normal;
+	           border: 1px solid silver;
+	           padding: 1px 4px 1px 4px;
+	           font-variant: normal;
+	           font-weight: normal;
+	           text-decoration: none;
+	           text-indent: 0em;
+	         }
+
+	.footnotes        { border: 1px dashed #808080; margin-top: 6em; margin-bottom: 120px; padding: 20px; }
+	.footnote         { margin-left: 5%; margin-right: 5%; text-align: justify; }
+	.footnote .label,
+	.fnanchor         { vertical-align: super; text-decoration: none; font-size: x-small; font-weight: normal; font-style: normal; }
+
+	.poem             { margin: auto; text-align: left; font-size: 0.9em; }
+	.poem br          { display: none; }
+	.poem .stanza     { margin: 1em 0em 1em 0em; }
+	.poem span.i0     { display: block; margin-left: 0em; padding-left: 3em; text-indent: -3em; }
+	.poem span.i1     { display: block; margin-left: 0.4em; padding-left: 3em; text-indent: -3em; }
+
+	table.together { border-collapse: collapse; }
+	table.together td { padding: 2px; }
+
+	#tnote { width: 30em;
+	         border: 1px dashed #808080;
+	         background-color: #f6f6f6;
+	         text-align: justify;
+	         padding: 0.5em;
+	         margin: 120px auto 120px auto;
+	       }
+	#tnote hr { width: 4em; height: 1px; color: black; background-color: black; border: none; }
+// -->
+/* XML end  ]]>*/
+    </style>
+  </head>
+<body>
+
+
+<pre>
+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Fruits of Culture, by Leo Tolstoy
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Fruits of Culture
+
+Author: Leo Tolstoy
+
+Translator: Louise Maude
+            Aylmer Maude
+
+Release Date: September 20, 2008 [EBook #26663]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK FRUITS OF CULTURE ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Bryan Ness, Jana Srna and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+
+<div id="tnote"><p class="center" style="font-weight: bold;">Transcriber's Note:</p>
+<p>This e-book belongs to Tolstoy's <cite>Plays (Complete Edition)</cite>.
+The front matter, including the table of contents, can be found in a
+<a href="http://www.gutenberg.org/files/26660/26660-h/26660-h.htm">separate e-book</a>;
+it links to the other plays in the collection.</p>
+<hr/>
+<p>Every effort has been made to replicate this text as faithfully as
+possible; changes (corrections of spelling and punctuation) made to
+the original text are marked <ins title="transcriber's note">like this</ins>.
+The original text appears when hovering the cursor over the marked text.</p></div>
+
+<h1 style="line-height: 2em; font-size: large; font-weight: normal; margin-top: 120px;"><big style="font-size: 1.3em;">FRUITS OF CULTURE</big><br/>
+
+<i>A COMEDY IN FOUR ACTS</i></h1>
+
+<p class="center">(1889)</p>
+
+
+
+<div class="new-h2">&nbsp;</div>
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_122">122</a></span></p>
+<h2>CHARACTERS</h2>
+
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH ZVEZD&Iacute;NTSEF.</span> A retired Lieutenant of the
+Horse Guards. Owner of more than 60,000 acres of land in various
+provinces. A fresh-looking, bland, agreeable gentleman of 60. Believes
+in Spiritualism, and likes to astonish people with his wonderful stories.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA ZVEZD&Iacute;NTSEVA.</span> Wife of Leon&iacute;d. Stout; pretends
+to be young; quite taken up with the conventionalities of life; despises
+her husband, and blindly believes in her doctor. Very irritable.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Their daughter. A young woman of 20, fast, tries to be
+mannish, wears a pince-nez, flirts and giggles. Speaks very quickly
+and distinctly.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH ZVEZD&Iacute;NTSEF.</span> Their son, aged 25; has
+studied law, but has no definite occupation. Member of the Cycling
+Club, Jockey Club, and of the Society for Promoting the Breeding of
+Hounds. Enjoys perfect health, and has imperturbable self-assurance.
+Speaks loud and abruptly. Is either perfectly serious&mdash;almost morose,
+or is noisily gay and laughs loud. Is nicknamed Vovo.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">ALEX&Eacute;Y <ins title="VLAD&Iacute;MIROVITCH">VLAD&Iacute;MIRITCH</ins> KROUGOSV&Eacute;TLOF.</span> A professor and
+scientist of about 50, with quiet and pleasantly self-possessed manners,
+and quiet, deliberate, harmonious speech. Likes to talk. Is mildly disdainful
+of those who do not agree with him. Smokes much. Is lean
+and active.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">THE DOCTOR.</span> About 40. Healthy, fat, red-faced, loud-voiced, and
+rough; with a self-satisfied smile constantly on his lips.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA.</span> A girl of 20, from the Conservatoire,
+teacher of music. Wears a fringe, and is super-fashionably dressed.
+Obsequious, and gets easily confused.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> About 28; has taken his degree in philology, and is
+looking out for a position. Member of the same clubs as Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch,
+and also of the Society for the Organisation of Calico Balls.<a name="FNanchor_1_1" href="#Footnote_1_1" class="fnanchor">[1]</a> Is
+bald-headed, quick in movement and speech, and very polite.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_123">123</a></span>
+<i><span class="speaker">THE BARONESS.</span> A pompous lady of about 50, slow in her movements,
+speaks with monotonous intonation.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">THE PRINCESS.</span> A society woman, a visitor.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">HER DAUGHTER.</span> An affected young society woman, a visitor.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">THE COUNTESS.</span> An ancient dame, with false hair and teeth. Moves
+with great difficulty.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN.</span> A dark, nervous, lively man of Jewish type. Speaks
+very loud.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">THE FAT LADY: M&Aacute;RYA <ins title="VAS&Iacute;LYEVNA">VAS&Iacute;LEVNA</ins> TOLBO&Uacute;HINA.</span> A very distinguished,
+rich, and kindly woman, acquainted with all the notable
+people of the last and present generations. Very stout. Speaks hurriedly,
+trying to be heard above every one else. Smokes.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">BARON KL&Iacute;NGEN</span> (nicknamed <span class="speaker">KOKO</span>). A graduate of Petersburg
+University. Gentleman of the Bedchamber, Attach&eacute; to an Embassy.
+Is perfectly correct in his deportment, and therefore enjoys peace of
+mind and is quietly gay.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">TWO SILENT LADIES.</span></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">SERG&Eacute;Y IV&Aacute;NITCH SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> About 50, an ex-Assistant Minister
+of State. An elegant gentleman, of wide European culture, engaged in
+nothing and interested in everything. His carriage is dignified and at
+times even severe.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Personal attendant on Zvezd&iacute;ntsef, aged
+about 60. A man of some education and fond of information. Uses
+his pince-nez and pocket-handkerchief too much, unfolding the latter very
+slowly. Takes an interest in politics. Is kindly and sensible.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> A footman, about 28, handsome, profligate, envious, and
+insolent.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Butler, about 40, a bustling, kindly man, to whom the interests
+of his family in the village are all-important.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> The butler's assistant, about 20, a healthy, fresh, peasant lad,
+fair, beardless as yet; calm and smiling.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">THE COACHMAN.</span> A man of about 35, a dandy. Has moustaches
+but no beard. Rude and decided.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">A DISCHARGED MAN-COOK.</span> About 45, dishevelled, unshaved, bloated,
+yellow and trembling. Dressed in a ragged, light summer-overcoat
+and dirty trousers. Speaks hoarsely, ejecting the words abruptly.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">THE SERVANTS' COOK.</span> A talkative, dissatisfied woman of 30.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">THE DOORKEEPER.</span> A retired soldier.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA (TATY&Aacute;NA M&Aacute;RKOVNA).</span> Lady's-maid, 19, energetic, strong,
+merry, with quickly-changing moods. At moments, when strongly excited,
+she shrieks with joy.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_124">124</a></span>
+<i><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> About 60. Has served as village Elder. Imagines
+that he knows how to treat gentlefolk, and likes to hear himself talk.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> About 45, head of a family. A man of few
+words. Rough and truthful. The father of Simon.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> About 70. Wears shoes of plaited bast. Is
+nervous, restless, hurried, and tries to cover his confusion by much
+talking.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">FIRST FOOTMAN</span> (in attendance on the Countess). An old man, with
+old-fashioned manners, and proud of his place.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">SECOND FOOTMAN.</span> Of enormous size, strong, and rude.</i></p>
+
+<p><i><span class="speaker">A PORTER FROM A FASHIONABLE DRESSMAKER'S SHOP.</span> A fresh-faced
+man in dark-blue long coat. Speaks firmly, emphatically, and
+clearly.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>The action takes place in Moscow, in Zvezd&iacute;ntsef's house.</i></p>
+
+
+
+<div class="new-h2">&nbsp;</div>
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_125">125</a></span></p>
+<p class="center" style="font-size: x-large; margin-top: 0em;">FRUITS OF CULTURE</p>
+
+
+
+<div class="new-h2">&nbsp;</div>
+<h2><a name="act1">ACT I</a></h2>
+
+<p class="scene">The entrance hall of a wealthy house in Moscow. There
+are three doors: the front door, the door of Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch's
+study, and the door of Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch's room. A
+staircase leads up to the other rooms; behind it is another
+door leading to the servants' quarters.</p>
+
+
+<div class="new-h3">&nbsp;</div>
+<h3 class="smcap">Scene 1.</h3>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY</span> [<i>looks at himself in the glass and arranges his hair,
+&amp;c.</i>] I <em>am</em> sorry about those moustaches of mine! &ldquo;Moustaches
+are not becoming to a footman,&rdquo; she says! And
+why? Why, so that any one might see you're a footman,&mdash;else
+my looks might put her darling son to shame. He's
+a likely one! There's not much fear of his coming anywhere
+near me, moustaches or no moustaches! [<i>Smiling
+into the glass</i>] And what a lot of 'em swarm round me.
+And yet I don't care for any of them as much as for
+that T&aacute;nya. And she only a lady's-maid! Ah well,
+she's nicer than any young lady. [<i>Smiles</i>] She is a duck!
+[<i>Listening</i>] Ah, here she comes. [<i>Smiles</i>] Yes, that's her,
+clattering with her little heels. Oh!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter T&aacute;nya, carrying a cloak and boots.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> My respects to you, Taty&aacute;na M&aacute;rkovna.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> What are you always looking in the glass for?
+Do you think yourself so good-looking?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Well, and are my looks not agreeable?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_126">126</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> So, so; neither agreeable nor disagreeable, but
+just betwixt and between! Why are all those cloaks hanging there?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> I am just going to put them away, your ladyship!
+[<i>Takes down a fur cloak and, wrapping it round her,
+embraces her</i>] I say, T&aacute;nya, I'll tell you something&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Oh, get away, do! What do you mean by it?
+[<i>Pulls herself angrily away</i>] Leave me alone, I tell you!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY</span> [<i>looks cautiously around</i>] Then give me a kiss!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Now, really, what are you bothering for? I'll
+give you such a kiss! [<i>Raises her hand to strike</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>off the scene, rings and then shouts</i>]
+Gregory!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> There now, go! Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch is calling you.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> He'll wait! He's only just opened his eyes!
+I say, why don't you love me?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> What sort of loving have you imagined now? I
+don't love anybody.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> That's a fib. You love Simon! You have
+found a nice one to love&mdash;a common, dirty-pawed peasant,
+a butler's assistant!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Never mind; such as he is, you are jealous of
+him!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>off the scene</i>] Gregory!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> All in good time.&hellip; Jealous indeed! Of
+what? Why, you have only just begun to get licked
+into shape, and who are you tying yourself up with? Now,
+wouldn't it be altogether a different matter if you loved
+me?&hellip; I say, T&aacute;nya&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>angrily and severely</i>] You'll get nothing from
+me, I tell you!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>off the scene</i>] Gregory!!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> You're mighty particular, ain't you?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>off the scene, shouts persistently, monotonously,
+and with all his might</i>] Gregory! Gregory! Gregory!
+[<i>T&aacute;nya and Gregory laugh</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_127">127</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> You should have seen the girls that have been
+sweet on me. [<i>Bell rings</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well then, go to them, and leave me alone!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> You are a silly, now I think of it. I'm not
+Simon!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Simon means marriage, and not tomfoolery!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Porter, carrying a large cardboard box.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER.</span> Good morning!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Good morning! Where are you from?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER.</span> From Bourdey's. I've brought a dress, and
+here's a note for the lady.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>taking the note</i>] Sit down, and I'll take it in.
+[<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch looks out of the door in shirt-sleeves and
+slippers.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Gregory!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Yes, sir.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Gregory! Don't you hear me call?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> I've only just come, sir.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Hot water, and a cup of tea.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Yes, sir; Simon will bring them directly.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> And who is this? Ah, from Bourdier?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER.</span> Yes, sir.</p>
+
+<p><i>Exeunt Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch and Gregory. Bell rings. T&aacute;nya
+runs in at the sound of the bell and opens the front door.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>to Porter</i>] Please wait a little.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER.</span> I am waiting.</p>
+
+<p><i>Sah&aacute;tof enters at front door.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I beg your pardon, but the footman has just
+gone away. This way, sir. Allow me, please. [<i>Takes his
+fur cloak</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>adjusting his clothes</i>] Is Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch at
+home? Is he up? [<i>Bell rings</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Oh yes, sir. He's been up a long time.</p>
+
+<p><i>Doctor enters and looks round for the footman. Sees Sah&aacute;tof
+and addresses him in an offhand manner.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_128">128</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> Ah, my respects to you!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>looks fixedly at him</i>] The Doctor, I believe?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> And I thought you were abroad! Dropped in
+to see Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Yes. And you? Is any one ill?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR</span> [<i>laughing</i>] Not exactly ill, but, you know &hellip;
+It's awful with these ladies! Sits up at cards till three
+every morning, and pulls her waist into the shape of a
+wine-glass. And the lady is flabby and fat, and carries
+the weight of a good many years on her back.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Is this the way you state your diagnosis to
+Anna P&aacute;vlovna? I should hardly think it quite pleases her!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR</span> [<i>laughing</i>] Well, it's the truth. They do all
+these tricks&mdash;and then come derangements of the
+digestive organs, pressure on the liver, nerves, and all
+sorts of things, and one has to come and patch them up.
+It's just awful! [<i>Laughs</i>] And you? You are also a
+spiritualist it seems?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> I? No, I am not also a spiritualist.&hellip; Good
+morning! [<i>Is about to go, but is stopped by the Doctor</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> No! But I can't myself, you know, positively
+deny the possibility of it, when a man like Krougosv&eacute;tlof is
+connected with it all. How can one? Is he not a professor,&mdash;a
+European celebrity? There must be something
+in it. I should like to see for myself, but I never have the
+time. I have other things to do.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Yes, yes! Good morning. [<i>Exit, bowing slightly</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR</span> [<i>to T&aacute;nya</i>] Is Anna P&aacute;vlovna up?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> She's in her bedroom, but please come up.</p>
+
+<p><i>Doctor goes upstairs.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch enters with a newspaper in his hand.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>to Porter</i>] What is it you want?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER.</span> I'm from Bourdey's. I brought a dress and a
+note, and was told to wait.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Ah, from Bourdey's! [<i>To T&aacute;nya</i>]
+Who came in just now?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_129">129</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> It was Serg&eacute;y Iv&aacute;nitch Sah&aacute;tof and the Doctor.
+They stood talking here a bit. It was all about spiritalism.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>correcting her</i>] Spirit<em>u</em>alism.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Yes, that's just what I said&mdash;spiritalism. Have
+you heard how well it went off last time, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch?
+[<i>Laughs</i>] There was knocks, and things flew about!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> And how do <em>you</em> know?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Miss Elizabeth told me.</p>
+
+<p><i>Jacob runs in with a tumbler of tea on a tray.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB</span> [<i>to the Porter</i>] Good morning!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER</span> [<i>disconsolately</i>] Good morning!</p>
+
+<p><i>Jacob knocks at Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch's door.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>Gregory enters.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Give it here.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> You didn't bring back all yesterday's tumblers,
+nor the tray Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch had. And it's me that have
+to answer for them!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> The tray is full of cigars.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Well, put them somewhere else. It's me who's
+answerable for it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> I'll bring it back! I'll bring it back!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Yes, so you say, but it is not where it ought to
+be. The other day, just as the tea had to be served, it
+was not to be found.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> I'll bring it back, I tell you. What a fuss!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> It's easy for you to talk. Here am I serving tea
+for the third time, and now there's the lunch to get ready.
+One does nothing but rush about the livelong day. Is
+there any one in the house who has more to do than me?
+Yet they are never satisfied with me.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Dear me? Who could wish for any one more
+satisfactory? You're such a fine fellow!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Nobody is good enough for you! You alone&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY</span> [<i>to T&aacute;nya</i>] No one asked your opinion!
+[<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_130">130</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Ah well, I don't mind. Taty&aacute;na M&aacute;rkovna, did
+the mistress say anything about yesterday?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> About the lamp, you mean?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> And how it managed to drop out of my hands,
+the Lord only knows! Just as I began rubbing it, and
+was going to take hold of it in another place, out it slips
+and goes all to pieces. It's just my luck! It's easy for
+that Gregory Mih&aacute;ylitch to talk&mdash;a single man like him!
+But when one has a family, one has to consider things:
+they have to be fed. I don't mind work.&hellip; So she
+didn't say anything? The Lord be thanked!&hellip; Oh,
+Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, have you one spoon or two?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> One. Only one! [<i>Reads newspaper</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Exit Jacob.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>Bell rings. Enter Gregory (carrying a tray) and the Doorkeeper.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOORKEEPER</span> [<i>to Gregory</i>] Tell the master some peasants
+have come from the village.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY</span> [<i>pointing to Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch</i>] Tell the major-domo
+here, it's his business. I have no time. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Where are these peasants from?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOORKEEPER.</span> From Koursk, I think.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>shrieks with delight</i>] It's them.&hellip; It's Simon's
+father come about the land! I'll go and meet them!
+[<i>Runs off</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOORKEEPER.</span> Well, then, what shall I say to them?
+Shall they come in here? They say they've come about
+the land&mdash;the master knows, they say.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Yes, they want to purchase some
+land. All right! But he has a visitor now, so you had
+better tell them to wait.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOORKEEPER.</span> Where shall they wait?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Let them wait outside. I'll send
+for them when the time comes. [<i>Exit Doorkeeper</i>]</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter T&aacute;nya, followed by three Peasants.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> To the right. In here! In here!</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_131">131</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> I did not want them brought in
+here!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Forward minx!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Oh, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, it won't matter, they'll
+stand in this corner.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> They'll dirty the floor.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> They've scraped their shoes, and I'll wipe
+the floor up afterwards. [<i>To Peasants</i>] Here, stand just
+here.</p>
+
+<p><i>Peasants come forward carrying presents tied in cotton
+handkerchiefs: cake, eggs, and embroidered towels. They look
+around for an ic&oacute;n before which to cross themselves; not finding
+one, they cross themselves looking at the staircase.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY</span> [<i>to Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch</i>]. There now, Theodore
+Iv&aacute;nitch, they say Pironnet's boots are an elegant shape.
+But those there are ever so much better. [<i>Pointing to the
+third Peasant's bast shoes</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Why will you always be ridiculing
+people? [<i>Exit Gregory</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>rises and goes up to the Peasants</i>]
+So you are from Koursk? And have come to arrange
+about buying some land?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Just so. We might say, it is for the
+completion of the purchase of the land we have come.
+How could we announce ourselves to the master?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Yes, yes, I know. You wait a bit
+and I'll go and inform him. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>The Peasants look around; they are embarrassed where to
+put their presents.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> There now, couldn't we have what d'you
+call it? Something to present these here things on? To
+do it in a genteel way, like,&mdash;a little dish or something.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> All right, directly; put them down here for the
+present. [<i>Puts bundles on settle</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> There now,&mdash;that respectable gentleman
+that was here just now,&mdash;what might be his station?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_132">132</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> He's the master's valet.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> I see. So he's also in service. And you,
+now, are you a servant too?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I am lady's-maid. Do you know, I also come
+from D&eacute;men! I know you, and you, but I don't know
+him. [<i>Pointing to third Peasant</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Them two you know, but me you don't
+know?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> You are Ef&iacute;m Ant&oacute;nitch.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> And you are Simon's father, Zachary Trif&aacute;nitch.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Right!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> And let me tell you, I'm M&iacute;try Vl&aacute;sitch
+Tchil&iacute;kin. Now do you know?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Now I shall know you too!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> And who may you be?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I am Aks&iacute;nya's, the soldier's wife's, orphan.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST AND THIRD PEASANTS</span> [<i>with surprise</i>] Never!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> The proverb says true:</p>
+
+<div class="poem" style="width: 24em;"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&ldquo;Buy a penny pig, put it in the rye,<br /></span>
+<span class="i1">And you'll have a wonderful fat porker by-and-by.&rdquo;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it! She's got the resemblance
+of a duchess!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> That be so truly. Oh Lord!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> [<i>off the scene, rings, and then shouts</i>]
+Gregory! Gregory!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Now who's that, for example, disturbing
+himself in such a way, if I may say so?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> That's the young master.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord! Didn't I say we'd better wait
+outside until the time comes? [<i>Silence</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Is it <em>you</em>, Simon wants to marry?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Why, has he been writing? [<i>Hides her face in
+her apron</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_133">133</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> It's evident he's written! But it's a
+bad business he's imagined here. I see the lad's got
+spoilt!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>quickly</i>] No, he's not at all spoilt! Shall I send
+him to you?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Why send him? All in good time.
+Where's the hurry?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>desperately, behind scene</i>] Gregory!
+Where the devil are you?&hellip; [<i>Enters from his room in
+shirt-sleeves, adjusting his pince-nez</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Is every one dead?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> He's not here, sir.&hellip; I'll send him to you at
+once. [<i>Moves towards the back door</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> I could hear you talking, you know.
+How have these scarecrows sprung up here? Eh?
+What?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> They're peasants from the Koursk village, sir.
+[<i>Peasants bow</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> And who is this? Oh yes, from
+Bourdier.</p>
+
+<p><i>Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch pays no attention to the Peasants' bow.
+T&aacute;nya meets Gregory at the doorway and remains on the
+scene.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>to Gregory</i>] I told you the other
+boots&hellip; I can't wear these!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Well, the others are also there.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> But where is <em>there</em>?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Just in the same place!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> They're not!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY</span>. Well, come and see. [<i>Exeunt Gregory and
+Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Say now, might we not in the meantime
+just go and wait, say, in some lodging-house or
+somewhere?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> No, no, wait a little. I'll go and bring you some
+plates to put the presents on. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_134">134</a></span>
+<i>Enter Sah&aacute;tof and Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch, followed by Theodore
+Iv&aacute;nitch.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>The Peasants take up the presents, and pose themselves.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>to Peasants</i>] Presently, presently!
+Wait a bit! [<i>Points to Porter</i>] Who is this?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER.</span> From Bourdey's.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Ah, from Bourdier.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>smiling</i>] Well, I don't deny it: still you understand
+that, never having seen it, we, the uninitiated, have
+some difficulty in believing.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> You say you find it difficult to believe!
+We do not ask for faith; all we demand of you is
+to investigate! How can I help believing in this ring?
+Yet this ring came from there!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> From <em>there</em>? What do you mean? From
+where?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> From the other world. Yes!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>smiling</i>] That's very interesting&mdash;very interesting!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Well, supposing we admit that I'm
+a man carried away by an idea, as you think, and
+that I am deluding myself. Well, but what of Alex&eacute;y
+Vlad&iacute;miritch Krougosv&eacute;tlof&mdash;he is not just an ordinary
+man, but a distinguished professor, and yet he admits it to
+be a fact. And not he alone. What of Crookes? What
+of Wallace?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> But I don't deny anything. I only say it is
+very interesting. It would be interesting to know how
+Krougosv&eacute;tlof explains it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> He has a theory of his own. Could
+you come to-night?&mdash;he is sure to be here. First we shall
+have Grossman&mdash;you know, the famous thought-reader?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Yes, I have heard of him but have never
+happened to meet him.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Then you must come! We shall
+first have Grossman, then Kaptch&iacute;tch, and our mediumistic
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_135">135</a></span>s&eacute;ance.&hellip; [<i>To Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch</i>] Has the man returned
+from Kaptch&iacute;tch?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Not yet, sir.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Then how am I to know?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Never mind, come in any case! If
+Kaptch&iacute;tch can't come we shall find our own medium.
+M&aacute;rya Ign&aacute;tievna is a medium&mdash;not such a good one as
+Kaptch&iacute;tch, but still&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya enters with plates for the presents, and stands listening.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>smiling</i>] Oh yes, yes. But here is one puzzling
+point:&mdash;how is it that the mediums are always of the,
+so-called, educated class, such as Kaptch&iacute;tch and M&aacute;rya
+Ign&aacute;tievna? If there were such a special force, would it
+not be met with also among the common people&mdash;the
+peasants?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Oh yes, and it is! That is very
+common. Even here in our own house we have a peasant
+whom we discovered to be a medium. A few days ago
+we called him in&mdash;a sofa had to be moved, during a
+s&eacute;ance&mdash;and we forgot all about him. In all probability
+he fell asleep. And, fancy, after our s&eacute;ance was over
+and Kaptch&iacute;tch had come to again, we suddenly noticed
+mediumistic phenomena in another part of the room, near
+the peasant: the table gave a jerk and moved!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>aside</i>] That was when I was getting out from
+under it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> It is quite evident he also is a
+medium. Especially as he is very like Home in appearance.
+You remember Home&mdash;a fair-haired na&iuml;ve sort of
+fellow?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>shrugging his shoulders</i>] Dear me, this is very
+interesting, you know. I think you should try him.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> So we will! And he is not alone;
+there are thousands of mediums, only we do not know
+them. Why, only a short time ago a bedridden old
+woman moved a brick wall!</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_136">136</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Moved a brick &hellip; a brick wall?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, yes. She was lying in bed,
+and did not even know she was a medium. She just leant
+her arm against the wall, and the wall moved!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> And did not cave in?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> And did not cave in.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Very strange! Well then, I'll come this
+evening.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Pray do. We shall have a s&eacute;ance
+in any case. [<i>Sah&aacute;tof puts on his outdoor things, Leon&iacute;d
+Fy&oacute;doritch sees him to the door</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER</span> [<i>to T&aacute;nya</i>] Do tell your mistress! Am I to
+spend the night here?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Wait a little; she's going to drive out with the
+young lady, so she'll soon be coming downstairs. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>comes up to the Peasants, who bow and
+offer him their presents</i>] That's not necessary!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT</span> [<i>smiling</i>] Oh, but this-here is our first
+duty, it is! It's also the Commune's orders that we should
+do it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> That's always been the proper way.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Say no more about it! 'Cause as we are
+much satisfied.&hellip; As our parents, let's say, served, let's
+say, your parents, so we would like the same with all our
+hearts &hellip; and not just anyhow! [<i>Bows</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> But what is it about? What do
+you want?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> It's to your honour we've come&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Petr&iacute;stchef briskly, in fur-lined overcoat.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Is Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch awake yet? [<i>Seeing
+Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch, bows, moving only his head</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> You have come to see my son?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> I? Yes, just to see Vovo for a moment.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Step in, step in.</p>
+
+<p><i>Petr&iacute;stchef takes off his overcoat and walks in briskly.
+Exit.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_137">137</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>to Peasants</i>] Well, what is it you want?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Please accept our presents!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT</span> [<i>smiling</i>] That's to say, the peasants'
+offerings.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Say no more about it; what's the good?
+We wish you the same as if you were our own father! Say
+no more about it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> All right. Here, Theodore, take
+these.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>to Peasants</i>] Give them here. [<i>Takes
+the presents</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Well, what is the business?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> We've come to your honour&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> I see you have; but what do you
+want?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> It's about making a move towards completing
+the sale of the land. It comes to this&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Do you mean to buy the land?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it. It comes to this &hellip; I
+mean the buying of the property of the land. The Commune
+has given us, let's say, the power of atturning, to
+enter, let's say, as is lawful, through the Government
+bank, with a stamp for the lawful amount.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> You mean that you want to buy the
+land through the land-bank.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it. Just as you offered it to us
+last year. It comes to this, then, the whole sum in full for
+the buying of the property of the land is 32,864 roubles.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> That's all right, but how about
+paying up?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> As to the payment, the Commune offers
+just as it was said last year&mdash;to pay in 'stalments, and
+your receipt of the ready money by lawful regulations,
+4000 roubles in full.<a name="FNanchor_2_2" href="#Footnote_2_2" class="fnanchor">[2]</a></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_138">138</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Take 4000 now, and wait for the rest
+of the money.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT</span> [<i>unwrapping a parcel of money</i>] And about
+this be quite easy. We should pawn our own selves
+rather than do such a thing just anyhow say, but in this
+way, let's say, as it ought to be done.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> But did I not write and tell you
+that I should not agree to it unless you brought the whole
+sum?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it. It would be more agreeable,
+but it is not in our possibilities, I mean.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Well then, the thing can't be done!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> The Commune, for example, relied its
+hopes on that, that you made the offer last year to sell
+it in easy 'stalments&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> That was last year. I would have
+agreed to it then, but now I can't.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> But how's that? We've been depending
+on your promise&mdash;we've got the papers ready and have
+collected the money!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Be merciful, master! We're short of
+land; we'll say nothing about cattle, but even a hen, let's
+say, we've no room to keep. [<i>Bows</i>] Don't wrong us,
+master! [<i>Bows</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Of course it's quite true, that I
+agreed last year to let you have the land for payment by
+instalments, but now circumstances are such that it would
+be inconvenient.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Without this land we cannot live!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it. Without land our lives
+must grow weaker and come to a decline.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT</span> [<i>bowing</i>] Master, we have so little land,
+let's not talk about the cattle, but even a chicken, let's
+say, we've no room for. Master, be merciful, accept the
+money, master!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>examining the document</i>] I quite understand,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_139">139</a></span>and should like to help you. Wait a little; I
+will give you an answer in half-an-hour.&hellip; Theodore,
+say I am engaged and am not to be disturbed.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Yes, sir. [<i>Exit Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>The Peasants look dejected.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Here's a go! &ldquo;Give me the whole
+sum,&rdquo; he says. And where are we to get it from?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> If he had not given us hopes, for example.
+As it is we felt quite insured it would be as was said last
+year.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord! and I had begun unwrapping
+the money. [<i>Begins wrapping up the bundle of bank-notes
+again</i>] What are we to do now?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> What is your business, then?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Our business, respected sir, depends in
+this. Last year he made us the offer of our buying the
+land in 'stalments. The Commune entered upon these
+terms and gave us the powers of atturning, and now d'you
+see he makes the offering that we should pay the whole
+in full! And as it turns out, the business is no ways convenient
+for us.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> What is the whole sum?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> The whole sum in readiness is 4000
+roubles, you see.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Well, what of that? Make an
+effort and collect more.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Such as it is, it was collected with much
+effort. We have, so to say, in this sense, not got ammunition
+enough.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> You can't get blood out of a stone.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> We'd be glad with all our hearts, but
+we have swept even this together, as you might say,
+with a broom.</p>
+
+<p><i>Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch and Petr&iacute;stchef appear in the doorway
+both smoking cigarettes.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> I have told you already I'll do my
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_140">140</a></span>best, so of course I will do all that is possible! Eh,
+what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> You must just understand that if you do
+not get it, the devil only knows what a mess we shall
+be in!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> But I've already said I'll do my best,
+and so I will. Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Nothing. I only say, get some at any <ins title="cost">cost.</ins>
+I will wait.</p>
+
+<p><i>Exit into Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch's room, closing door.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>waving his arm</i>] It's a deuce of a go!
+[<i>The Peasants bow</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>looking at Porter, to Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch</i>]
+Why don't you attend to this fellow from Bourdier? He
+hasn't come to take lodgings with us, has he? Just look,
+he is asleep! Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> The note he brought has been sent
+in, and he has been told to wait until Anna P&aacute;vlovna
+comes down.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>looks at Peasants and notices the money</i>]
+And what is this? Money? For whom? Is it for us?
+[<i>To Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch</i>] Who are they?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> They are peasants from Koursk.
+They are buying land.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Has it been sold them?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> No, they have not yet come to any
+agreement. They are too stingy.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Eh? Well, we must try and persuade
+them. [<i>To the Peasants</i>] Here, I say, are you buying
+land? Eh?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it. We have made an offering
+as how we should like to acquire the possession of the
+land.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Then you should not be so stingy,
+you know. Just let me tell you how necessary land is to
+peasants! Eh, what? It's very necessary, isn't it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_141">141</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it. The land appears as the
+very first and foremost necessity to a peasant. That's
+just it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Then why be so stingy? Just you
+think what land is! Why, one can sow wheat on it in
+rows! I tell you, you could get eighty bushels of wheat,
+at a rouble and a half a bushel&mdash;that would be 120 roubles.
+Eh, what? Or else mint! I tell you, you could collar
+400 roubles off an acre by sowing mint!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it. All sorts of producks one
+could put into action if one had the right understanding.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Mint! Decidedly mint! I have
+learnt about it, you know. It's all printed in books. I
+can show them you. Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it, all concerns are clearer to
+you through your books. That's learnedness, of course.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Then pay up and don't be <ins title="stingy">stingy.</ins>
+[<i>To Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch</i>] Where's papa?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> He gave orders not to be disturbed
+just now.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Oh, I suppose he's consulting a spirit
+whether to sell the land or not? Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> I can't say. All I know is that he
+went away undecided about it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> What d'you think, Theodore <ins title="Ivan&iacute;tch">Iv&aacute;nitch</ins>,
+is he flush of cash? Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> I don't know. I hardly think <ins title="so,">so.</ins>
+But what does it matter to you? You drew a good sum
+not more than a week ago.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> But didn't I pay for those dogs?
+And now, you know, there's our new Society, and Petr&iacute;stchef
+has been chosen, and I had borrowed money from
+Petr&iacute;stchef and must pay the subscription both for him
+and for myself. Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> And what is this new Society? A
+Cycling Club?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_142">142</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> No. Just let me tell you. It is quite
+a new Society. It is a very serious Society, you know. And
+who do you think is President? Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> What's the object of this new
+Society?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> It is a &ldquo;Society to Promote the
+Breeding of Pure-bred Russian Hounds.&rdquo; Eh, what?
+And I'll tell you, they're having the first meeting and a
+lunch, to-day. And I've no money. I'll go to him and
+have a try! [<i>Exit through study door</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT</span> [<i>to Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch</i>] And who might he
+be, respected sir?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>smiles</i>] The young master.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> The heir, so to say. Oh Lord! [<i>puts
+away the money</i>] I'd better hide it meanwhile.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> And we were told he was in military
+service, in the cav'rely, for example.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> No, as an only son he is exempt
+from military service.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Left for to keep his parents, so to say!
+That's right!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT</span> [<i>shaking his head</i>] He's the right sort.
+He'll feed them finely!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch followed by Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> That's always the way. It's really
+surprising! First I'm asked why I have no occupation,
+and now when I have found a field and am occupied, when
+a Society with serious and noble aims has been founded, I
+can't even have 300 roubles to go on with!&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> I tell you I can't do it, and I can't!
+I haven't got it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Why, you have just sold some land.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> In the first place I have not sold it!
+And above all, do leave me in peace! Weren't you told I
+was engaged? [<i>Exit, slamming door</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_143">143</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> I told you this was not the right
+moment.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Well, I say! Here's a position to be
+in! I'll go and see mamma&mdash;that's my only hope. He's
+going crazy over his spiritualism and forgets everything
+else. [<i>Goes upstairs</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch takes newspaper and is just going to sit
+down, when Betsy and M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna, followed by
+Gregory, come down the stairs.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Is the carriage ready?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Just coming to the door.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span> [<i>to M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna</i>] Come along, come along,
+I know it is he.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA.</span> Which he?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> You know very well whom I mean&mdash;Petr&iacute;stchef,
+of course.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA.</span> But where is he?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Sitting in Vovo's room. You'll see!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA.</span> And suppose it is not he? [<i>The
+Peasants and Porter bow</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span> [<i>to Porter</i>] You brought a dress from Bourdier's?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER.</span> Yes, Miss. May I go?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Well, I don't know. Ask my mother.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER.</span> I don't know whose it is, Miss; I was ordered to
+bring it here and receive the money.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Well then, wait.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA.</span> Is it still that costume for the
+charade?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Yes, a charming costume. But mamma won't
+take it or pay for it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA.</span> But why not?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> You'd better ask mamma. She doesn't grudge
+Vovo 500 roubles for his dogs, but 100 is too much for a
+dress. I can't act dressed like a scarecrow. [<i>Pointing to
+Peasants</i>] And who are these?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_144">144</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Peasants who have come to buy some land or
+other.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> And I thought they were the beaters. Are you
+not beaters?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> No, no, lady. We have come to see
+Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch about the signing into our possession of
+the title-deeds to some land.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Then how is it? Vovo was expecting some
+beaters who were to come to-day. Are you sure you are
+not the beaters? [<i>The Peasants are silent</i>] How stupid they
+are! [<i>Goes to Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch's door</i>] Vovo? [<i>Laughs</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA.</span> But we met him just now upstairs!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Why need you remember that? Vovo, are you
+there?</p>
+
+<p><i>Petr&iacute;stchef enters.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Vovo is not here, but I am prepared to
+fulfil on his behalf anything that may be required. How
+do you do? How do you do, M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna?
+[<i>Shakes hands long and violently with Betsy, and then with
+M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> See, it's as if he were pumping water!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> You can't replace him,&mdash;still you're better than
+nobody. [<i>Laughs</i>] What are these affairs of yours with
+Vovo?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> What affairs? Our affairs are fie-nancial,
+that is, our business is fie! It's also nancial, and besides it
+is financial.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> What does nancial mean?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> What a question! It means nothing, that's
+just the point.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> No, no, you have missed fire. [<i>Laughs</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> One can't always hit the mark, you know.
+It's something like a lottery. Blanks and blanks again,
+and at last you win! [<i>Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch goes into the
+study</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_145">145</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Well, this was blank then; but tell me, were you
+at the Merg&aacute;sofs' last night?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Not exactly at the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">M&egrave;re</i> G&aacute;sof's, but rather
+at the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">P&egrave;re</i> G&aacute;sof's, or better still, at the <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Fils</i> G&aacute;sof's.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> You can't do without puns. It's an illness.
+And were the Gypsies there?<a name="FNanchor_3_3" href="#Footnote_3_3" class="fnanchor">[3]</a> [<i>Laughs</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF</span> [<i>sings</i>] &ldquo;On their aprons silken threads,
+little birds with golden heads!&rdquo;&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Happy mortals! And we were yawning at
+Fofo's.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF</span> [<i>continues to sing</i>] &ldquo;And she promised and
+she swore, She would ope' her &hellip; her &hellip; her&nbsp;&hellip;&rdquo;
+how does it go on, M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA.</span> &ldquo;Closet door.&rdquo;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> How? What? How, M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Cessez, vous devenez impossible!</i><a name="FNanchor_4_4" href="#Footnote_4_4" class="fnanchor">[4]</a></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">J'ai cess&eacute;, j'ai b&eacute;b&eacute;, j'ai d&eacute;d&eacute;.&hellip;</i><a name="FNanchor_5_5" href="#Footnote_5_5" class="fnanchor">[5]</a></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> I see the only way to rid ourselves of your wit
+is to make you sing! Let us go into Vovo's room, his
+guitar is there. Come, M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna, come!
+[<i>Exeunt Betsy, M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna, and Petr&iacute;stchef</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Who be they?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> One is our young lady, the other is a girl who
+teaches her music.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Administrates learning, so to say. And
+ain't she smart? A reg'lar picture!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Why don't they marry her? She is old
+enough, I should say.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Do you think it's the same as among you
+peasants,&mdash;marry at fifteen?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> And that man, for example, is he also in
+the musitional line?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_146">146</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">GREGORY</span> [<i>mimicking him</i>] &ldquo;Musitional&rdquo; indeed! You
+don't understand anything!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just so. And stupidity, one might
+say, is our ignorance.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord! [<i>Gipsy songs and guitar accompaniment
+are heard from Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch's room</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Simon, followed by T&aacute;nya, who watches the meeting
+between father and son.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY</span> [<i>to Simon</i>] What do you want?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> I have been to Mr. Kaptch&iacute;tch.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Well, and what's the answer?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> He sent word he couldn't possibly come to-night.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> All right, I'll let them know. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON</span> [<i>to his father</i>] How d'you do, father! My respects
+to Daddy Ef&iacute;m and Daddy M&iacute;try! How are all
+at home?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Very well, Simon.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> How d'you do, lad?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> How d'you do, sonny?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON</span> [<i>smiles</i>] Well, come along, father, and have some
+tea.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Wait till we've finished our business.
+Don't you see we are not ready yet?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Well, I'll wait for you by the porch. [<i>Wishes to
+go away</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>running after him</i>] I say, why didn't you tell
+him anything?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> How could I before all those people? Give me
+time, I'll tell him over our tea. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch enters and sits down by the window.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Respected sir, how's our business proceeding?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Wait a bit, he'll be out presently,
+he's just finishing.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>to Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch</i>] And how do you know,
+Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, he is finishing?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_147">147</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> I know that when he has finished
+questioning, he reads the question and answer aloud.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Can one really talk with spirits by means of a
+saucer?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> It seems so.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> But supposing they tell him to sign, will he sign?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Of course he will.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> But they do not speak with words?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Oh, yes. By means of the alphabet.
+He notices at which letter the saucer stops.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Yes, but at a si-ance?&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Well, friends, I can't do it! I should
+be very glad to, but it is quite impossible. If it were for
+ready money it would be a different matter.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just so. What more could any one
+desire? But the people are so inpennycuous&mdash;it is quite
+impossible!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Well, I can't do it, I really can't.
+Here is your document; I can't sign it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Show some pity, master; be merciful!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> How can you act so? It is doing us a
+wrong.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Nothing wrong about it, friends. I
+offered it you in summer, but then you did not agree; and
+now I can't agree to it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Master, be merciful! How are we to
+get along? We have so little land. We'll say nothing
+about the cattle; a hen, let's say, there's no room to let a
+hen run about.</p>
+
+<p><i>Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch goes up to the door and stops. Enter,
+descending the staircase, Anna P&aacute;vlovna and doctor, followed
+by Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch, who is in a merry and playful mood and
+is putting some bank-notes into his purse.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>tightly laced, and wearing a bonnet</i>] Then
+I am to take it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_148">148</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> If the symptoms recur you must certainly take
+it, but above all, you must behave better. How can you
+expect thick syrup to pass through a thin little hair tube,
+especially when we squeeze the tube? It's impossible;
+and so it is with the biliary duct. It's simple enough.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> All right, all right!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> Yes, &ldquo;All right, all right,&rdquo; and you go on in the
+same old way. It won't do, madam&mdash;it won't do. Well,
+good-bye!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> No, not good-bye, only <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">au revoir</i>! For
+I still expect you to-night. I shall not be able to make
+up my mind without you.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> All right, if I have time I'll pop in. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>noticing the Peasants</i>] What's this?
+What? What people are these? [<i>Peasants bow</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> These are peasants from Koursk,
+come to see Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch about the sale of some
+land.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> I see they are peasants, but who let
+them in?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch gave the order.
+He has just been speaking to them about the sale of the
+land.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> What sale? There is no need to sell
+any. But above all, how can one let in people from the
+street into the house? One can't let people in from the
+street! One can't let people into the house who have
+spent the night heaven knows where!&hellip; [<i>Getting more
+and more excited</i>] I daresay every fold of their clothes is
+full of microbes&mdash;of scarlet-fever microbes, of smallpox
+microbes, of diphtheria microbes! Why, they are from
+Koursk Government, where there is an epidemic of diphtheria
+&hellip; Doctor! Doctor! Call the doctor back!</p>
+
+<p><i>Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch goes into his room and shuts the door.
+Gregory goes to recall the Doctor.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>smokes at the Peasants</i>] Never mind,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_149">149</a></span>mamma; if you like I'll fumigate them so that all the
+microbes will go to pot! Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><i>Anna P&aacute;vlovna remains severely silent, awaiting the Doctor's
+return.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>to Peasants</i>] And do you fatten pigs?
+There's a first-rate business!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just so. We do go in for the
+pig-fattening line now and then.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> This kind?&hellip; [<i>Grunts like a pig</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Vovo, Vovo, leave off!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Isn't it like? Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just so. It's very resemblant.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Vovo, leave off, I tell you!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> What's it all about?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> I said, we'd better go to some lodging
+meanwhile!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Doctor and Gregory.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> What's the matter? What's happened?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Why, you're always saying I must not
+get excited. Now, how is it possible to keep calm? I
+do not see my own sister for two months, and am careful
+about any doubtful visitor&mdash;and here are people from
+Koursk, straight from Koursk, where there is an epidemic
+of diphtheria, right in my house!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> These good fellows you mean, I suppose?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Of course. Straight from a diphtheric
+place!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> Well, of course, if they come from an infected
+place it is rash; but still there is no reason to excite yourself
+so much about it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> But don't you yourself advise carefulness?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> Of course, of course. Still, why excite yourself?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> How can I help it? Now we shall
+have to have the house completely disinfected.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> Oh no! Why completely? That would cost
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_150">150</a></span>300 roubles or more. I'll arrange it cheaply and well for
+you. Take, to a large bottle of water&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Boiled?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> It's all the same. Boiled would be better. To
+one bottle of water take a tablespoon of salicylic acid, and
+have everything they have come in contact with washed
+with the solution. As to the fellows themselves, they
+must be off, of course. That's all. Then you're quite
+safe. And it would do no harm to sprinkle some of the
+same solution through a spray&mdash;two or three tumblers&mdash;you'll
+see how well it will act. No danger whatever!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> T&aacute;nya! Where is T&aacute;nya?</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter T&aacute;nya.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Did you call, M'm?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> You know that big bottle in my dressing-room?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Out of which we sprinkled the laundress yesterday?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Well, of course! What other bottle
+could I mean? Well then, take that bottle and first
+wash with soap the place where they have been standing,
+and then with&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Yes, M'm; I know how.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> And then take the spray &hellip; However,
+I had better do that myself when I get back.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> Well then, do so, and don't be afraid! Well,
+<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">au revoir</i> till this evening. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> And they must be off! Not a trace of
+them must remain! Get out, get out! Go&mdash;what are
+you looking at?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just so. It's because of our
+stupidity, as we were instructed&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY</span> [<i>pushes the Peasants out</i>] There, there; be
+off!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Let me have my handkerchief back!
+[<i>The handkerchief in which the presents were wrapped</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_151">151</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord, oh Lord! didn't I say&mdash;some
+lodging-house meanwhile!</p>
+
+<p><i>Gregory pushes him out. Exeunt Peasants.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER</span> [<i>who has repeatedly tried to say something</i>] Will
+there be any answer?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Ah, from Bourdier? [<i>Excitedly</i>] None!
+None! You can take it back. I told her I never ordered
+such a costume, and I will not allow my daughter to
+wear it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER.</span> I know nothing about it. I was sent&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Go, go, take it back! I will call myself
+about it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>solemnly</i>] Sir Messenger from Bourdier,
+depart!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PORTER.</span> I might have been told that long ago. I have
+sat here nearly five hours!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Ambassador from Bourdier, begone!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Cease, please!</p>
+
+<p><i>Exit Porter.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Betsy! Where is she? I always have
+to wait for her.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>shouting at the top of his voice</i>] Betsy!
+Petr&iacute;stchef! Come quick, quick, quick! Eh? What?</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Petr&iacute;stchef, Betsy, and M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> You always keep one waiting!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> On the contrary, I was waiting for you!</p>
+
+<p><i>Petr&iacute;stchef bows with his head only, then kisses Anna P&aacute;vlovna's
+hand.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> How d'you do! [<i>To Betsy</i>] You always
+have an answer ready!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> If you are upset, mamma, I had better not go.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Are we going or not?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Well, let us go; it can't be helped.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Did you see the man from Bourdier?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Yes, and I was very glad. I ordered the costume,
+and am going to wear it when it is paid for.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_152">152</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> I am not going to pay for a costume
+that is indecent!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Why has it become indecent? First it was
+decent, and now you have a fit of prudery.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Not prudery at all! If the bodice were
+completely altered, then it would do.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Mamma, that is quite impossible.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Well, get dressed. [<i>They sit down.
+Gregory puts on their over-shoes for them</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna, do you notice
+a vacuum in the hall?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA.</span> What is it? [<i>Laughs in anticipation</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Bourdier's man has gone! Eh,
+what? Good, eh? [<i>Laughs loudly</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Well, let us go. [<i>Goes out of the door, but
+returns at once</i>] T&aacute;nya!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Yes, M'm?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Don't let Frisk catch cold while I am
+away. If she wants to be let out, put on her little yellow
+cloak. She is not quite well to-day.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Yes, M'm.</p>
+
+<p><i>Exeunt Anna P&aacute;vlovna, Betsy, and Gregory.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Well, have you got it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Not without trouble, I can tell you!
+First I rushed at the gov'nor; he began to bellow and
+turned me out. Off to the mater&mdash;I got it out of her.
+It's here! [<i>Slaps his breast pocket</i>] If once I make up my
+mind, there's no getting away from me. I have a deadly
+grip! Eh, what? And d'you know, my wolf-hounds are
+coming to-day.</p>
+
+<p><i>Petr&iacute;stchef and Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch put on their outdoor things
+and go out. T&aacute;nya follows.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>alone</i>] Yes, nothing but unpleasantness.
+How is it they can't live in peace? But one
+must say the new generation are not&mdash;the thing. And
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_153">153</a></span>as to the women's dominion!&hellip; Why, Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch
+just now was going to put in a word, but seeing what a
+frenzy she was in&mdash;slammed the door behind him. He
+is a wonderfully kind-hearted man. Yes, wonderfully
+kind. What's this? Here's T&aacute;nya bringing them back
+again!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Come in, come in, grand-dads, never mind!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter T&aacute;nya and the Peasants.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Why have you brought them back?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, we must do something
+about their business. I shall have to wash the place anyhow.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> But the business will not come off,
+I see that already.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> How could we best put our affair into
+action, respected sir? Your reverence might take a little
+trouble over it, and we should give you full thankings
+from the Commune for your trouble.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Do try, honey! We can't live! We
+have so little land. Talk of cattle&mdash;why, we have no room
+to keep a hen! [<i>They bow</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> I am sorry for you, friends, but I
+can't think of any way to help you. I understand your
+case very well, but he has refused. So what can one do?
+Besides, the lady is also against it. Well, give me your
+papers&mdash;I'll try and see what I can do, but I hardly hope
+to succeed. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya and the three Peasants sigh.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> But tell me, grand-dads, what is it that is
+wanted?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Why, only that he should put his signature
+to our document.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> That the master should sign? Is that all?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Yes, only lay his signature on the deed
+and take the money, and there would be an end of the
+matter.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_154">154</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> He only has to write and sign, as the
+peasants, let's say, desire, so, let's say, I also desire.
+That's the whole affair&mdash;if he'd only take it and sign it,
+it's all done.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>considering</i>] He need only sign the paper and
+it's done?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just so. The whole matter is in
+dependence on that, and nothing else. Let him sign,
+and we ask no more.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Just wait and see what Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch will
+say. If he cannot persuade the master, I'll try something.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Get round him, will you?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I'll try.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Ay, the lass is going to bestir herself.
+Only get the thing settled, and the Commune will bind
+itself to keep you all your life. See there, now!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> If the affair can be put into action, truly
+we might put her in a gold frame.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> That goes without saying!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I can't promise for certain, but as the saying is:
+&ldquo;An attempt is no sin, if you try&nbsp;&hellip;&rdquo;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> &ldquo;You may win.&rdquo; That's just so.</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> No, friends, it's no go! He has not
+done it, and he won't do it. Here, take your document.
+You may go.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT</span> [<i>gives T&aacute;nya the paper</i>] Then it's on you
+we pin all our reliance, for example.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Yes, yes! You go into the street, and I'll run
+out to you in a minute and have a word with you.</p>
+
+<p><i>Exeunt Peasants.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, dear Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, ask
+the master to come out and speak to me for a moment.
+I have something to say to him.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> What next?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_155">155</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I must, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch. Ask him, do; there's
+nothing wrong about it, on my sacred word.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> But what do you want with him?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> That's a little secret. I will tell you later on,
+only ask him.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>smiling</i>] I can't think what you are
+up to! All right, I'll go and ask him. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I'll do it! Didn't he say himself that there is
+that power in Simon? And I know how to manage. No
+one found me out that time, and now I'll teach Simon
+what to do. If it doesn't succeed it's no great matter.
+After all it's not a sin.</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch followed by Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>smiling</i>] Is this the petitioner?
+Well, what is your business?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> It's a little secret, Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch; let me
+tell it you alone.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> What is it? Theodore, leave us
+for a minute.</p>
+
+<p><i>Exit Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> As I have grown up and lived in your house,
+Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch, and as I am very grateful to you for
+everything, I shall open my heart to you as to a father.
+Simon, who is living in your house, wants to marry me.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> So that's it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I open my heart to you as to a father! I have
+no one to advise me, being an orphan.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Well, and why not? He seems a
+nice lad.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Yes, that's true. He would be all right; there
+is only one thing I have my doubts about. It's something
+about him that I have noticed and can't make out &hellip;
+perhaps it is something bad.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> What is it? Does he drink?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> God forbid! But since I know that there is
+such a thing as spiritalism&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_156">156</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Ah, you know that?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Of course! I understand it very well. Some,
+of course, through ignorance, don't understand it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Well, what then?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I am very much afraid for Simon. It does
+happen to him.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> What happens to him?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Something of a kind like spiritalism. You ask
+any of the servants. As soon as he gets drowsy at the
+table, the table begins to tremble, and creak like that:
+<em>tuke, &hellip; tuke</em>! All the servants have heard it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Why, it's the very thing I was
+saying to Serg&eacute;y Iv&aacute;nitch this morning! Yes?&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Or else &hellip; when was it?&hellip; Oh yes, last
+Wednesday. We sat down to dinner, and the spoon just
+jumps into his hand of itself!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Ah, that is interesting! Jumps
+into his hand? When he was drowsing?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> That I didn't notice. I think he was, though.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes?&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> And that's what I'm afraid of, and what I wanted
+to ask you about. May not some harm come of it? To
+live one's life together, and him having such a thing in
+him!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>smiling</i>] No, you need not be afraid,
+there is nothing bad in that. It only proves him to be a
+<em>medium</em>&mdash;simply a medium. I knew him to be a medium
+before this.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> So that's what it is! And I was afraid!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> No, there's nothing to be afraid of.
+[<i>Aside</i>]. That's capital! Kaptch&iacute;tch can't come, so we
+will test him to-night.&hellip; [<i>To T&aacute;nya</i>] No, my dear,
+don't be afraid, he will be a good husband and &hellip; that
+is only a kind of special power, and every one has it, only
+in some it is weaker and in others stronger.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Thank you, sir. Now I shan't think any more
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_157">157</a></span>about it; but I was so frightened.&hellip; What a thing it
+is, our want of education!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> No, no, don't be frightened&hellip;
+Theodore!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> I am going out now. Get everything
+ready for to-night's s&eacute;ance.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> But Mr. Kaptch&iacute;tch is not coming.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> That does not matter. [<i>Puts on overcoat</i>]
+We shall have a trial s&eacute;ance with our own medium.
+[<i>Exit. Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch goes out with him</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>alone</i>] He believes it! He believes it! [<i>Shrieks
+and jumps with joy</i>] He really believes it! Isn't it wonderful!
+[<i>Shrieks</i>] Now I'll do it, if only Simon has pluck
+for it!</p>
+
+<p><i>Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch returns.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Well, have you told him your secret?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I'll tell you too, only later on.&hellip; But I have a
+favour to ask of you too, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Yes? What is it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>shyly</i>] You have been a second father to me,
+and I will open my heart before you as before God.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Don't beat about the bush, but
+come straight to the point.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> The point is &hellip; well, the point is, that Simon
+wants to marry me.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Is that it? I thought I noticed&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well, why should I hide it? I am an orphan,
+and you know yourself how matters are in these town
+establishments. Every one comes bothering; there's that
+Gregory Mih&aacute;ylitch, for instance, he gives me no peace.
+And also that other one &hellip; you know. They think I
+have no soul, and am only here for their amusement.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Good girl, that's right! Well, what
+then?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well, Simon wrote to his father; and he, his
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_158">158</a></span>father, sees me to-day, and says: &ldquo;He's spoilt&rdquo;&mdash;he means
+his son. Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch [<i>bows</i>], take the place of a
+father to me, speak to the old man,&mdash;to Simon's father! I
+could take them into the kitchen, and you might come
+in and speak to the old man!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>smiling</i>] Then I am to turn match-maker&mdash;am
+I? Well, I can do that.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, dearest, be a father to me,
+and I'll pray for you all my life long.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> All right, all right, I'll come later on.
+Haven't I promised? [<i>Takes up newspaper</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> You are a second father to me!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> All right, all right.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Then I'll rely on you. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>alone, shaking his head</i>] A good affectionate
+girl. To think that so many like her perish!
+Get but once into trouble and she'll go from hand to
+hand until she sinks into the mire, and can never be found
+again! There was that dear little Nataly. She, too, was
+a good girl, reared and cared for by a mother. [<i>Takes up
+paper</i>] Well, let's see what tricks Ferdinand is up to in
+Bulgaria.</p>
+
+<p class="center curtain"><i>Curtain.</i></p>
+
+
+
+<div class="new-h2">&nbsp;</div>
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_159">159</a></span></p>
+<h2>ACT II</h2>
+
+<p class="scene">Evening of the same day. The scene represents the interior
+of the servants' kitchen. The Peasants have taken off their
+outer garments and sit drinking tea at the table, and perspiring.
+Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch is smoking a cigar at the other side of the
+stage. The discharged Cook is lying on the brick oven, and is
+unseen during the early part of the scene.</p>
+
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> My advice is, don't hinder him! If
+it's his wish and hers, in Heaven's name let him do it.
+She is a good, honest girl. Never mind her being a bit
+dressy; she can't help that, living in town: she is a good
+girl all the same.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Well, of course, if it is his wish, let him!
+<em>He'll</em> have to live with her, not me. But she's certainly
+uncommon spruce. How's one to take her into one's
+hut? Why, she'll not let her mother-in-law so much as
+pat her on the head.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> That does not depend on the spruceness,
+but on character. If her nature is good, she's sure
+to be docile and respectful.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Ah, well, we'll have her if the lad's
+bent on having her. After all, it's a bad job to live with
+one as one don't care for. I'll consult my missus, and then
+may Heaven bless them!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Then let's shake hands on it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Well, it seems it will have to come off.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Eh, Zachary! fortune's a-smiling on you!
+You've come to accomplish a piece of business, and just
+see what a duchess of a daughter-in-law you've obtained.
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_160">160</a></span>All that's left to be done is to have a drink on it, and
+then it will be all in order.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> That's not at all necessary. [<i>An
+awkward silence</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> I know something of your way of
+life too, you know. I am even thinking of purchasing a
+bit of land, building a cottage, and working on the land
+myself somewhere: maybe in your neighbourhood.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> A very good thing too.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it. When one has got the
+money one can get all kinds of pleasure in the country.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Say no more about it! Country life,
+let's say, is freer in every way, not like the town!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> There now, would you let me join
+your Commune if I settled among you?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Why not? If you stand drink for the
+Elders, they'll accept you soon enough!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> And if you open a public-house, for
+example, or an inn, why, you'd have such a life you'd
+never need to die! You might live like a king, and no
+mistake.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Well, we'll see. I should certainly
+like to have a few quiet years in my old age. Though my
+life here is good enough, and I should be sorry to leave.
+Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch is an exceedingly kind-hearted man.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it. But how about our business?
+Is it possible that he is going to leave it without
+any termination?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> He'd do it willingly.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> It seems he's afraid of his wife.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> It's not that he's afraid, but they
+don't hit things off together.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> But you should try, father! How are
+we to live else? We've so little land&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> We'll see what comes of T&aacute;nya's
+attempt. She's taken the business into her hands now!</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_161">161</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT</span> [<i>takes a sip of tea</i>] Father, be merciful.
+We've so little land. A hen, let's say, we've no room for
+a hen, let alone the cattle.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> If the business depended on me.&hellip;
+[<i>To Second Peasant</i>] Well, friend, so we've done
+our bit of match-making! It's agreed then about
+T&aacute;nya?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> I've given my word, and I'll not go
+back on it without a good reason. If only our business
+succeeds!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Servants' Cook who looks up at the oven, makes a sign,
+and then begins to speak animatedly to Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Just now Simon was called upstairs from
+the front kitchen! The master and that other bald-headed
+one who calls up spirits with him, ordered him to
+sit down and take the place of Kaptch&iacute;tch!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> You don't say so!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Yes, Jacob told T&aacute;nya.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Extraordinary!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Coachman.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> What do you want?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">COACHMAN</span> [<i>to Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch</i>] You may just tell them
+I never agreed to live with a lot of dogs! Let any one
+who likes do it, but I will never agree to live among dogs!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> What dogs?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">COACHMAN.</span> Three dogs have been sent into our room by
+Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch! They've messed it all over. They're
+whining, and if one comes near them they bite&mdash;the
+devils! They'd tear you to pieces if you didn't mind.
+I've a good mind to take a club and smash their legs for
+them!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> But when did they come?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">COACHMAN.</span> Why, to-day, from the Dog Show; the devil
+knows what kind they are, but they're an expensive sort.
+Are we or the dogs to live in the coachmen's quarters?
+You just go and ask!</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_162">162</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Yes, that will never do. I'll go
+and ask about it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">COACHMAN.</span> They'd better be brought here to <ins title="Louk&eacute;rya">Louk&eacute;rya.</ins></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK</span> [<i>angrily</i>] People have to eat here, and
+you'd like to lock dogs in here! As it is&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">COACHMAN.</span> And I've got the liveries, and the sledge-covers
+and the harness there, and they expect things kept
+clean! Perhaps the porter's lodge might do.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> I must ask Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">COACHMAN</span> [<i>angrily</i>] He'd better hang the brutes round
+his neck and lug them about with him! But no fear: he'd
+rather ride on horseback himself. It's he as spoilt Beauty
+without rhyme or reason. That was a horse!&hellip; Oh
+dear! what a life! [<i>Exit, slamming door</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> That's not right! Certainly not
+right! [<i>To Peasants</i>] Well then, it's time we were saying
+good-bye, friends.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PEASANTS.</span> Good-bye!</p>
+
+<p><i>Exit Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>As soon as he is gone a sound of groaning is heard from the
+top of the oven.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> He's sleek, that one; looks like a general.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Rather! Why, he has a room all to
+himself; he gets his washing, his tea and sugar, and food
+from the master's table.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DISCHARGED COOK</span> [<i>on the oven</i>]. Why shouldn't the old
+beggar live well? He's lined his pockets all right!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Who's that up there, on the oven?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Oh, it's only a man.</p>
+
+<p><i>Silence.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Well, and you too, as I noticed a while
+since when you were supping, have capital food to eat.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> We can't complain. She's not mean
+about the food. We have wheat bread every Sunday, and
+fish when a holiday happens to be a fast-day too, and
+those who like may eat meat.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_163">163</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> And does any one tuck into flesh on
+fast-days?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Oh, they nearly all do! Only the old
+coachman&mdash;not the one who was here just now but the
+old one&mdash;and Simon, and I and the housekeeper, fast&mdash;all
+the others eat meat.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> And the master himself?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Catch him! Why, I bet he's forgotten
+there is such a thing as fasting!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's the gentlefolks' way: they have
+got it all out of their books. 'Cos of their intelex!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Shouldn't wonder if they feed on wheat
+bread every day!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Wheat bread indeed! Much they think
+of wheat bread! You should see what food they eat. No
+end of different things!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> In course gentlefolks' food is of an airial
+kind.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Airial, of course, but all the same they're
+good at stuffing themselves, they are!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Have healthy appekites, so to say.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> 'Cos they always rinse it down! All
+with sweet wines, and spirits, and fizzy liquors. They
+have a different one to suit every kind of food. They eat
+and rinse it down, and eat and rinse it down, they do.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> And so the food's floated down in proportion,
+so to say.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Ah yes, they are good at stuffing! It's
+awful! You see, it's not just sitting down, eating, then
+saying grace and going away&mdash;they're always at it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Like pigs with their feet in the trough!
+[<i>Peasants laugh</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> As soon as, by God's grace, they have
+opened their eyes, the samov&aacute;r is brought in&mdash;tea, coffee,
+chocolate. Hardly is the second samov&aacute;r emptied, a third
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_164">164</a></span>has to be set. Then lunch, then dinner, then again
+coffee. They've hardly left off, then comes tea, and all
+sorts of tit-bits and sweetmeats&mdash;there's never an end to
+it! They even lie in bed and eat!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> There now; that's good! [<i>Laughs</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST AND SECOND PEASANTS.</span> What are you about?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> If I could only live a single day like
+that!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> But when do they do their work?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Work indeed! What is their work?
+Cards and piano&mdash;that's all their work. The young lady
+used to sit down to the piano as soon as she opened her
+eyes, and off she'd go! And that other one who lives
+here, the teacher, stands and waits. &ldquo;When will the
+piano be free?&rdquo; When one has finished, off rattles the
+other, and sometimes they'd put two pianos near one
+another and four of 'em would bust out at once. Bust
+out in such a manner, you could hear 'em down here!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Well, and that's all the work they do!
+Piano or cards! As soon as they have met together&mdash;cards,
+wine, smoking, and so on all night long. And as
+soon as they are up: eating again!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Simon.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Hope you're enjoying your tea!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Come and join us.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON</span> [<i>comes up to the table</i>] Thank you kindly. [<i>First
+Peasant pours out a cup of tea for him</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Where have you been?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Upstairs.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Well, and what was being done there?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Why, I couldn't make it out at all! I don't
+know how to explain it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> But what was it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> I can't explain it. They have been trying some
+kind of strength in me. I can't make it out. T&aacute;nya says,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_165">165</a></span>&ldquo;Do it, and we'll get the land for our peasants; he'll sell
+it them.&rdquo;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> But how is she going to manage it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> I can't make it out, and she won't say. She
+says, &ldquo;Do as I tell you,&rdquo; and that's all.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> But what is it you have to do?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Nothing just now. They made me sit down,
+put out the lights and told me to sleep. And T&aacute;nya had
+hidden herself there. They didn't see her, but I did.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Why? What for?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> The Lord only knows&mdash;I can't make it out.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Naturally it is for the distraction of time.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Well, it's clear you and I can make
+nothing of it. You had better tell me whether you have
+taken all your wages yet.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> No, I've not drawn any. I have twenty-eight
+roubles to the good, I think.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> That's all right! Well, if God grants
+that we get the land, I'll take you home, Simon.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> With all my heart!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> You've got spoilt, I should say. You'll
+not want to plough?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Plough? Only give me the chance! Plough or
+mow,&mdash;I'm game. Those are things one doesn't forget.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> But it don't seem very desirous after
+town life, for example? Eh!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> It's good enough for me. One can live in the
+country too.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> And Daddy M&iacute;try here, is already on the
+look-out for your place; he's hankering after a life of
+luckshury!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Eh, Daddy M&iacute;try, you'd soon get sick of it. It
+seems easy enough when one looks at it, but there's a lot
+of running about that takes it out of one.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> You should see one of their balls,
+Daddy M&iacute;try, then you would be surprised!</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_166">166</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Why, do they eat all the time?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> My eye! You should have seen what
+we had here awhile ago. Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch took me
+upstairs and I peeped in. The ladies&mdash;awful! Dressed
+up! Dressed up, bless my heart, and all bare down to
+here, and their arms bare.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Faugh! How beastly!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> I take it the climate allows of that sort
+of thing!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Well, daddy, so I peeped in. Dear
+me, what it was like! All of 'em in their natural skins!
+Would you believe it: old women&mdash;our mistress, only
+think, she's a grandmother, and even she'd gone and
+bared her shoulders.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> And what next? The music strikes up,
+and each man of 'em went up to his own, catches hold
+of her, and off they go twirling round and round!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> The old women too?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Yes, the old ones too.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> No, the old ones sit still.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Get along,&mdash;I've seen it myself!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> No they don't.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DISCHARGED COOK</span> [<i>in a hoarse voice, looking down from the
+oven</i>] That's the Polka-Mazurka. You fools don't understand
+what dancing is. The way they dance&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Shut up, you dancer! And keep quiet&mdash;there's
+some one coming.</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Gregory; old Cook hides hurriedly.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY</span> [<i>to Servants' Cook</i>] Bring some sour cabbage.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> I am only just up from the cellar, and
+now I must go down again! Who is it for?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> For the young ladies. Be quick, and send it
+up with Simon. I can't wait!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> There now, they tuck into sweetmeats
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_167">167</a></span>till they are full up, and then they crave for sour cabbage!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's to make a clearance.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Of course, and as soon as there is room
+inside, they begin again! [<i>Takes basin, and exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY</span> [<i>at Peasants</i>] Look at them, how they've established
+themselves down here! Mind, if the mistress finds
+it out she'll give it you hot, like she did this morning!
+[<i>Exit, laughing</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it, she did raise a storm that
+time&mdash;awful!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> That time it looked as if the master
+was going to step in, but seeing that the missus was about
+to blow the very roof off the house, he slams the door.
+Have your own way, thinks he.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT</span> [<i>waving his arm</i>] It's the same everywhere.
+My old woman, let's say, she kicks up such a
+rumpus sometimes&mdash;it's just awful! Then I just get out
+of the hut. Let her go to Jericho! She'll give you one
+with the poker if you don't mind. Oh Lord!</p>
+
+<p><i>Jacob enters hurriedly with a prescription.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Here, Simon, you run to the chemist's and get
+these powders for the mistress!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> But master told me not to go out.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> You've plenty of time; your business won't begin
+till after their tea. Hope you are enjoying your tea!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Thanks, come and join us.</p>
+
+<p><i>Exit Simon.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> I haven't time. However, I'll just have one cup
+for company's sake.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> And we've just been having a conversation
+as to how your mistress carried on so haughty this
+morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Oh, she's a reg'lar fury! So hot-tempered, that
+she gets quite beside herself. Sometimes she even bursts
+out crying.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_168">168</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Now, there's a thing I wanted to ask
+you about. What, for example, be these mikerots she was
+illuding to erewhile? &ldquo;They've infested the house with
+mikerots, with mikerots,&rdquo; she says. What is one to make
+of these same mikerots?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Mikerogues, you mean! Well, it seems there is
+such a kind of bugs; all illnesses come from them, they
+say. So she says there are some of 'em on you. After
+you were gone, they washed and washed and sprinkled
+the place where you had stood. There's a kind of physic
+as kills these same bugs, they say.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Then where have we got these bugs
+on us?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB</span> [<i>drinking his tea</i>] Why, they say they're so small
+that one can't see 'em even through a glass.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Then how does she know I've got 'em on
+me? Perhaps there's more of that muck on her than on me!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> There now, you go and ask her!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> I believe it's humbug.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Of course it's bosh. The doctors must invent
+something, or else what are they paid for? There's one
+comes to us every day. Comes,&mdash;talks a bit,&mdash;and pockets
+ten roubles!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Nonsense!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Why, there's one as takes a hundred!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> A hundred? Humbug!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> A hundred. Humbug, you say? Why, if he
+has to go out of town, he'll not do it for less than a thousand!
+&ldquo;Give a thousand,&rdquo; he says, &ldquo;or else you may
+kick the bucket for what I care!&rdquo;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Then does he know some charm?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> I suppose he must. I served at a General's outside
+Moscow once: a cross, terrible proud old fellow he
+was&mdash;just awful. Well, this General's daughter fell ill.
+They send for that doctor at once. &ldquo;A thousand roubles,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_169">169</a></span>then I'll come.&rdquo; Well, they agreed, and he came. Then
+they did something or other he didn't like, and he
+bawled out at the General and says, &ldquo;Is this the way you
+show your respect for me? Then I'll not attend her!&rdquo;
+And, oh my! The old General forgot all his pride,
+and starts wheedling him in every way not to chuck
+up the job!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> And he got the thousand?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Of course!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> That's easy got money. What wouldn't
+a peasant do with such a sum!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> And I think it's all bosh. That time
+my foot was festering I had it doctored ever so long. I
+spent nigh on five roubles on it,&mdash;then I gave up doctoring,
+and it got all right!</p>
+
+<p><i>Discharged Cook on the oven coughs.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Ah, the old crony is here again!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Who might that man be?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> He used to be our master's cook. He comes to
+see Louk&eacute;rya.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Kitchen-master, as one might say. Then,
+does he live here?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> No, they won't allow that. He's here one day,
+there another. If he's got a copper he goes to a dosshouse;
+but when he has drunk all, he comes here.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> How did he come to this?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Simply grew weak. And what a man he used
+to be&mdash;like a gentleman! Went about with a gold watch;
+got forty roubles a month wages. And now look at him!
+He'd have starved to death long ago if it hadn't been for
+Louk&eacute;rya.</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Servants' Cook with the sour cabbage.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB</span> [<i>to Servants' Cook</i>] I see you've got Paul Petr&oacute;vitch
+here again?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> And where's he to go to? Is he to go
+and freeze?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_170">170</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> What liquor does.&hellip; Liquor, let's say
+&hellip; [<i>Clicks his tongue sympathetically</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Of course. A firm man's firm as a
+rock; a weak man's weaker than water.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DISCHARGED COOK</span> [<i>gets off the oven with trembling hands and
+legs</i>] Louk&eacute;rya, I say, give us a drop!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> What are you up to? I'll give you
+such a drop!&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DISCHARGED COOK.</span> Have you no conscience? I'm dying!
+Brothers, a copper&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Get back on the oven, I tell you!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DISCHARGED COOK.</span> Half a glass only, cook, for Heaven's
+sake! I say, do you understand? I ask you in the name
+of Heaven, now!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Come along, here's some tea for you.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DISCHARGED COOK.</span> Tea; what is tea? Weak, sloppy
+stuff. A little v&oacute;dka&mdash;just one little drop &hellip; Louk&eacute;rya!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Poor old soul, what agony it is!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> You'd better give him some.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK</span> [<i>gets out a bottle and fills a wine-glass</i>]
+Here you are; you'll get no more.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DISCHARGED COOK</span> [<i>clutches hold of it and drinks, trembling
+all over</i>] Louk&eacute;rya, Cook! I am drinking, and you must
+understand&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Now then, stop your chatter! Get on
+to the oven, and let not a breath of you be heard! [<i>The
+old Cook meekly begins to climb up, muttering something to
+himself</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> What it is, when a man gives way to
+his weakness!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it&mdash;human weakness.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> That goes without saying.</p>
+
+<p><i>The Discharged Cook settles down, muttering all the time.
+Silence.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> I want to ask you something: that
+girl of Aks&iacute;nya's as comes from our village and is living
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_171">171</a></span>here. How is she? What is she like? How is she
+living&mdash;I mean, does she live honest?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> She's a nice girl; one can say nothing but good
+of her.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> I'll tell you straight, daddy; I know
+this here establishment out and out, and if you mean to
+have T&aacute;nya for your son's wife&mdash;be quick about it, before
+she comes to grief, or else she'll not escape!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Yes, that's true. A while ago we had a girl here,
+Nataly. She was a good girl too. And she was lost
+without rhyme or reason. No better than that chap!
+[<i>Pointing to the old Cook</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> There's enough to dam a mill-pool,
+with the likes of us, as perish! 'Cos why, every one is
+tempted by the easy life and the good food. And see
+there,&mdash;as soon as one has tasted the good food she goes
+and slips. And once she's slipped, they don't want her,
+but get a fresh one in her place. So it was with dear
+little Nataly; she also slipped, and they turned her out.
+She had a child and fell ill, and died in the hospital last
+spring. And what a girl she used to be!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord! People are weak; they
+ought to be pitied.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DISCHARGED COOK.</span> Those devils pity? No fear! [<i>He
+hangs his legs down from the oven</i>] I have stood roasting
+myself by the kitchen range for thirty years, and now
+that I am not wanted, I may go and die like a dog.&hellip;
+Pity indeed!&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it. It's the old circumstances.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span></p>
+
+<div class="poem" style="width: 28em;"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">While they drank and they fed, you were &ldquo;curly head.&rdquo;<br /></span>
+<span class="i0">When they'd finished the prog, 'twas &ldquo;Get out, mangy dog!&rdquo;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DISCHARGED COOK.</span> Much you know. What is &ldquo;Sautey a
+la Bongmont&rdquo;? What is &ldquo;Bavassary&rdquo;? Oh, the things
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_172">172</a></span>I could make! Think of it! The Emperor tasted my
+work, and now the devils want me no longer. But I
+am not going to stand it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Now then, stop that noise, mind.&hellip;
+Get up right into the corner, so that no one can see you,
+or else Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch or some one may come in, and
+both you and me'll be turned out! [<i>Silence</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> And do you know my part of the country? I'm
+from Voznes&eacute;nsky.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Not know it? Why, it's no more'n
+ten miles from our village; not <em>that</em> across the ford! Do
+you cultivate any land there?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> My brother does, and I send my wages. Though
+I live here, I am dying for a sight of home.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Then An&iacute;sim is your brother?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Own brother. He lives at the farther end of the
+village.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Of course, I know; his is the third
+house.</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter T&aacute;nya, running.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Jacob, what are you doing, amusing yourself
+here? She is calling you!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> I'm coming; but what's up?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Frisk is barking; it's hungry. And she's scolding
+you. &ldquo;How cruel he is,&rdquo; she says. &ldquo;He's no feeling,&rdquo;
+she says. &ldquo;It's long past Frisk's dinner-time, and
+he has not brought her food!&rdquo; [<i>Laughs</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB</span> [<i>rises to go</i>] Oh, she's cross? What's going to
+happen now, I wonder?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Here, take the cabbage with you.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> All right, give it here. [<i>Takes basin, and exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Who is going to dine now?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Why, the dog! It's her dog. [<i>Sits down and takes
+up the tea-pot</i>] Is there any more tea? I've brought some.
+[<i>Puts fresh tea into the tea-pot.</i>]</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_173">173</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Dinner for a dog?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Yes, of course! They prepare a special cutlet
+for her; it must not be too fat. And I do the washing&mdash;the
+dog's washing, I mean.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Oh Lord!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> It's like that gentleman who had a funeral for
+his dog.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> What's that?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Why, some one told me he had a dog&mdash;I mean the
+gentleman had a dog. And it died. It was winter, and he
+went in his sledge to bury that dog. Well, he buried it, and
+on the way home he sits and cries&mdash;the gentleman does.
+Well, there was such a bitter frost that the coachman's
+nose keeps running, and he has to keep wiping it. Let me
+fill your cup! [<i>Fills it</i>] So he keeps wiping his nose, and
+the gentleman sees it, and says, &ldquo;What are you crying
+about?&rdquo; And the coachman, he says, &ldquo;Why, sir, how can
+I help it; is there another dog like him?&rdquo; [<i>Laughs</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> And I daresay he thinks to himself,
+&ldquo;If your own self was to kick the bucket I'd not cry.&rdquo;
+[<i>Laughs</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DISCHARGED COOK</span> [<i>from up on the oven</i>] That is true; that's
+right!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well, the gentleman, he gets home and goes
+straight to his lady: &ldquo;What a good-hearted man our
+coachman is; he was crying all the way home about poor
+Dash. Have him called.&hellip; Here, drink this glass of
+v&oacute;dka,&rdquo; he says, &ldquo;and here's a rouble as a reward for
+you.&rdquo; That's just like her saying Jacob has no feelings
+for her dog! [<i>The Peasants laugh</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's the style!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> That was a go!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Ay, lassie, but you've set us a-laughing!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>pouring out more tea</i>] Have some more! Yes, it
+only seems that our life is pleasant; but sometimes it is
+very disgusting,&mdash;clearing up all their messes! Faugh! It's
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_174">174</a></span>better in the country. [<i>Peasants turn their cups upside-down,
+as a polite sign that they have had enough. T&aacute;nya pours out
+more tea</i>] Have some more, Ef&iacute;m Ant&oacute;nitch. I'll fill your
+cup, M&iacute;try Vl&aacute;sitch.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> All right, fill it, fill it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Well, dear, and what progression is our
+business making?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> It's getting on&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 600px;"><a name="business"></a>
+<img src="images/p174-insert.png" width="600" height="393" alt="" title="" />
+<div class="caption smcap">FRUITS OF CULTURE. Act II.</div>
+<div class="caption" style="text-align: justify; margin-left: 2em; margin-right: 2em;"><span class="smcap">First Peasant.</span> Well, dear, and what progression is our business making?<br/>
+<span class="smcap">T&aacute;nya.</span> It's getting on&nbsp;&hellip;</div>
+</div>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Simon told us&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>quickly</i>] Did he?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> But he could not make us understand.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I can't tell you now, but I'm doing my best&mdash;all
+I can! And I've got your paper here! [<i>Shows the paper
+hidden under the bib of her apron</i>] If only one thing succeeds.&hellip;
+[<i>Shrieks</i>] Oh, how nice it would be!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Don't lose that paper, mind. It has cost
+money.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Never fear. You only want him to sign it? Is
+that all?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Why, what else? Let's say he's signed
+it, and it's done! [<i>Turns his cup upside-down</i>] I've had
+enough.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>aside</i>] He'll sign it; you'll see he will&hellip; Have
+some more. [<i>Pours out tea</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> If only you get this business about the
+sale of the land settled, the Commune would pay your
+marriage expenses. [<i>Refuses the tea</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>pouring out tea</i>] Do have another cup.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> You get it done, and we'll arrange your
+marriage, and I myself, let's say, will dance at the wedding.
+Though I've never danced in all my born days, I'll dance
+then!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>laughing</i>] All right, I'll be in hopes of it. [<i>Silence</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT</span> [<i>examines T&aacute;nya</i>] That's all very well,
+but you're not fit for peasant work.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Who? I? Why, don't you think me strong
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_175">175</a></span>enough? You should see me lacing up my mistress.
+There's many a peasant couldn't tug as hard.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Where do you tug her to?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well, there's a thing made with bone, like&mdash;something
+like a stiff jacket, only up to here! Well, and I pull
+the strings just as when you saddle a horse&mdash;when you &hellip;
+what d'ye call it? You know, when you spit on your hands!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Tighten the girths, you mean.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Yes, yes, that's it. And you know I mustn't
+shove against her with my knee. [<i>Laughs</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Why do you pull her in?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> For a reason!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Why, is she doing penance?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> No, it's for beauty's sake!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's to say, you pull in her paunch for
+appearance' sake.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Sometimes I lace her up so that her eyes are
+ready to start from her head, and she says, &ldquo;Tighter,&rdquo; till
+my hands tingle. And you say I'm not strong! [<i>Peasants
+laugh and shake their heads</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> But here, I've been jabbering. [<i>Runs away,
+laughing</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Ah, the lassie has made us laugh!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> She's a tidy one!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> She's not bad.</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Sah&aacute;tof and Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch. Sah&aacute;tof holds a teaspoon
+in his hand.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Not exactly a dinner, but a <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">d&eacute;jeuner
+dinatoire</i>. And first-rate it was, I tell you. Ham of sucking-pig,
+delicious! Roulier feeds one splendidly! I've
+only just returned. [<i>Sees Peasants</i>] Ah, the peasants are
+here again!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Yes, yes, that's all very well, but we came here
+to hide this article. Where shall we hide it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Excuse me a moment. [<i>To <ins title="Servants">Servants'</ins>
+Cook</i>] Where are the dogs?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_176">176</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> In the coachman's quarters. You can't
+keep dogs in the servants' kitchen!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Ah, in the coachman's quarters? All
+right.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> I am waiting.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Excuse me, please. Eh, what? Hide
+it? I'll tell you what. Let's put it into one of the peasants'
+pockets. That one. I say, where's your pocket? Eh,
+what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> What for d'ye want my pocket? You're
+a good 'un! My pocket! There's money in my pocket!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Where's your bag, then?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> What for?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> What d'you mean? That's the young
+master!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>laughs. To Sah&aacute;tof</i>] D'you know why
+he's so frightened? Shall I tell you? He's got a heap of
+money. Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Yes, yes, I see. Well, you talk to them a bit,
+and I'll put it into that bag without being observed, so
+that they should not notice and could not point it out to
+him. Talk to them.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> All right! [<i>To Peasants</i>] Well then,
+old fellows, how about the land? Are you buying it?
+Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> We have made an offering, so to say, with
+our whole heart. But there,&mdash;the business don't come into
+action nohow.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> You should not be so stingy! Land
+is an important matter! I told you about planting mint.
+Or else tobacco would also do.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it. Every kind of producks.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> And you help us, master. Ask your
+father. Or else how are we to live? There's so little
+land. A fowl, let's say, there's not enough room for a
+fowl to run about.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_177">177</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>having put the spoon into a bag belonging to the
+Third Peasant</i>] <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">C'est fait.</i> Ready. Come along. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> So don't be stingy! Eh? Well,
+good-bye. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Didn't I say, come to some lodging-house?
+Well, supposing we'd had to give three-pence
+each, then at least we'd have been in peace. As to here,
+the Lord be merciful! &ldquo;Give us the money,&rdquo; he says.
+What's that for?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> He's drunk, I daresay.</p>
+
+<p><i>Peasants turn their cups upside-down, rise, and cross themselves.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> And d'you mind what a saying he threw
+out? Sowing mint! One must know how to understand
+them, that one must!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Sow mint indeed! He'd better bend
+his own back at that work, and then it's not mint he'll
+hanker after, no fear! Well, many thanks!&hellip; And
+now, good woman, would you tell us where we could lie
+down to sleep?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> One of you can lie on the oven, and the
+others on these benches.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Christ save you! [<i>Prays, crossing himself</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> If only by God's help we get our business
+settled! [<i>Lies down</i>] Then to-morrow, after dinner,
+we'd be off by the train, and on Tuesday we'd be home
+again.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Are you going to put out the light?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Put it out? Oh no! They'll keep
+running down here, first for one thing then another.&hellip;
+You lie down, I'll lower it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> How is one to live, having so little
+land? Why, this year, I have had to buy corn since
+Christmas. And the oat-straw is all used up. I'd like to
+get hold of ten acres, and then I could take Simon back.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_178">178</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> You're a man with a family. You'd
+get the land cultivated without trouble. If only the
+business comes off.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> We must pray to the Holy Virgin,
+maybe she'll help us out. [<i>Silence, broken by sighs. Then
+footsteps and voices are heard outside. The door opens. Enter
+Grossman hurriedly, with his eyes bandaged, holding Sah&aacute;tof's
+hand, and followed by the Professor and the Doctor, the Fat
+Lady and Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch, Betsy and Petr&iacute;stchef, Vas&iacute;ly
+Leon&iacute;ditch and M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna, Anna P&aacute;vlovna and
+the Baroness, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch and T&aacute;nya</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Peasants jump up. Grossman comes forward stepping
+quickly, then stops.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> You need not trouble yourselves; I have
+undertaken the task of observing, and am strictly
+fulfilling my duty! Mr. Sah&aacute;tof, are you not leading
+him?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Of course not!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> You must not lead him, but neither must you
+resist! [<i>To Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch</i>] I know these experiments.
+I have tried them myself. Sometimes I used to feel a
+certain effluence, and as soon as I felt it&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> May I beg of you to keep perfect
+silence?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Oh, I understand so well! I have experienced
+it myself. As soon as my attention was diverted I
+could no longer&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Sh&nbsp;&hellip;!</p>
+
+<p><i>Grossman goes about, searches near the First and Second
+Peasants, then approaches the Third, and stumbles over a
+bench.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BARONESS.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Mais dites-moi, on le paye?</i><a name="FNanchor_6_6" href="#Footnote_6_6" class="fnanchor">[6]</a></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Je ne saurais vous dire.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_179">179</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">BARONESS.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Mais c'est un monsieur?</i><a name="FNanchor_7_7" href="#Footnote_7_7" class="fnanchor">[7]</a></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Oh, oui!</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BARONESS.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">&Ccedil;a tient du miraculeux. N'est ce pas? Comment
+est-ce qu'il trouve?</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Je ne saurais vous dire. Mon mari vous
+l'expliquera.</i> [<i>Noticing Peasants, turns round, and sees the
+Servants' Cook</i>] <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Pardon</i> &hellip; what is this?</p>
+
+<p><i>Baroness goes up to the group.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>to Servants' Cook</i>] Who let the peasants
+in?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> Jacob brought them in.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Who gave Jacob the order?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> I can't say. Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch has
+seen them.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Leon&iacute;d!</p>
+
+<p><i>Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch does not hear, being absorbed in the search,
+and says, Sh&nbsp;&hellip;</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch! What is the meaning
+of this? Did you not see me disinfecting the whole
+hall, and now the whole kitchen is infected, all the rye
+bread, the milk&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> I thought there would not be any
+danger if they came here. The men have come on
+business. They have far to go, and are from our village.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> That's the worst of it! They are from
+the Koursk village, where people are dying of diphtheria
+like flies! But the chief thing is, I ordered them
+out of the house!&hellip; Did I, or did I not? [<i>Approaches
+the others that have gathered round the Peasants</i>] Be
+careful! Don't touch them&mdash;they are all infected with
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_180">180</a></span>diphtheria! [<i>No one heeds her, and she steps aside in a
+dignified manner and stands quietly waiting</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF</span> [<i>sniffs loudly</i>] I don't know if it is diphtheria,
+but there is some kind of infection in the air.
+Don't you notice it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Stop your nonsense! Vovo, which bag is it in?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> That one, that one. He is getting
+near, very near!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Is it spirits divine, or spirits of wine?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Now your cigarette comes in handy for once.
+Smoke closer, closer to me.</p>
+
+<p><i>Petr&iacute;stchef leans over her and smokes at her.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> He's getting near, I tell you. Eh,
+what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN</span> [<i>searches excitedly round the Third Peasant</i>] It is
+here; I feel it is!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Do you feel an effluence? [<i>Grossman stoops
+and finds the spoon in the bag</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ALL.</span> Bravo! [<i>General enthusiasm</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Ah! So that's where our spoon
+was. [<i>To Peasants</i>] Then that's the sort you are!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> What sort? I didn't take your spoon!
+What are you making out? I didn't take it, and my
+soul knows nothing about it. I didn't take it&mdash;there!
+Let him do what he likes. I knew he came here for no
+good. &ldquo;Where's your bag?&rdquo; says he. I didn't take it,
+the Lord is my witness! [<i>Crosses himself</i>] I didn't take
+it!</p>
+
+<p><i>The young people group round the Peasant, laughing.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>angrily to his son</i>] Always playing
+the fool! [<i>To the Third Peasant</i>] Never mind, friend!
+We know you did not take it; it was only an experiment.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN</span> [<i>removes bandage from his eyes, and pretends to be
+coming to</i>] Can I have a little water? [<i>All fuss round
+him</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Let's go straight from here into the
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_181">181</a></span>coachman's room. I've got a bitch there&mdash;<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr"><ins title="&eacute;p&acirc;tante">&eacute;patante</ins></i>!<a name="FNanchor_8_8" href="#Footnote_8_8" class="fnanchor">[8]</a>
+Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> What a horrid word. Couldn't you say dog?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> No. I can't say&mdash;Betsy is a man,
+<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr"><ins title="&eacute;p&acirc;tant">&eacute;patant</ins></i>. I should have to say young woman; it's a parallel
+case. Eh, what? M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna, isn't it true?
+Good, eh? [<i>Laughs loudly</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA.</span> Well, let us go. [<i>Exeunt M&aacute;rya
+Konstant&iacute;novna, Betsy, Petr&iacute;stchef, and Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY</span> [<i>to Grossman</i>] Well? how are you? Have
+you rested? [<i>Grossman does not answer. To Sah&aacute;tof</i>] And
+you, Mr. Sah&aacute;tof, did you feel the effluence?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> I felt nothing. Yes, it was very fine&mdash;very
+fine. Quite a success!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BARONESS.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Admirable! &Ccedil;a ne le fait pas souffrir?</i><a name="FNanchor_9_9" href="#Footnote_9_9" class="fnanchor">[9]</a></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Pas le moins du monde.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>to Grossman</i>] May I trouble you? [<i>Hands
+him a thermometer</i>] At the beginning of the experiment
+it was 37 decimal 2, degrees.<a name="FNanchor_10_10" href="#Footnote_10_10" class="fnanchor">[10]</a> [<i>To Doctor</i>] That's right,
+I think? Would you mind feeling his pulse? Some
+loss is inevitable.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR</span> [<i>to Grossman</i>] Now then, sir, let's have your
+hand; we'll see, we'll see. [<i>Takes out his watch, and feels
+Grossman's pulse</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY</span> [<i>to Grossman</i>] One moment! The condition
+you were in could not be called sleep?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN</span> [<i>wearily</i>] It was hypnosis.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> In that case, are we to understand that you
+hypnotised yourself?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN.</span> And why not? An hypnotic state may ensue
+not only in consequence of association&mdash;the sound of the
+tom-tom, for instance, in Charcot's method&mdash;but by merely
+entering an hypnogenetic zone.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_182">182</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Granting that, it would still be desirable to
+define what hypnotism is, more exactly?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Hypnotism is a phenomenon resulting from
+the transmutation of one energy into another.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN.</span> Charcot does not so define it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> A moment, just a moment! That is your
+definition, but Li&eacute;bault told me himself&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR</span> [<i>lets go of Grossman's pulse</i>] Ah, that's all right;
+well now, the temperature?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY</span> [<i>interrupting</i>] No, allow me! I agree with the
+Professor. And here's the very best proof. After my
+illness, when I lay insensible, a desire to speak came over
+me. In general I am of a silent disposition, but then
+I was overcome by this desire to speak, and I spoke and
+spoke, and I was told that I spoke in such a way that
+every one was astonished! [<i>To Sah&aacute;tof</i>] But I think I
+interrupted you?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>with dignity</i>] Not at all. Pray continue.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> Pulse 82, and the temperature has risen three-tenths
+of a degree.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> There you are! That's a proof! That's just
+as it should be. [<i>Takes out pocket-book and writes</i>] 82, yes?
+And 37 and 5. When the hypnotic state is induced, it
+invariably produces a heightened action of the heart.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> I can, as a medical man, bear witness that your
+prognosis was justified by the event.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>to Sah&aacute;tof</i>] You were saying?&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> I wished to say that Li&eacute;bault told me himself
+that the hypnotic is only one particular psychical
+state, increasing susceptibility to suggestion.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> That is so, but still the law of equivalents is
+the chief thing.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN.</span> Moreover, Li&eacute;bault is far from being an
+authority, while Charcot has studied the subject from all
+sides, and has proved that hypnotism produced by a blow,
+a trauma&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_183">183</a></span></p>
+<table class="together" summary="All talking together">
+<tr>
+	<td rowspan="3" style="width: 6em;"><i>All talking together.</i></td>
+	<td style="border-bottom: 1px solid black; border-right: 1px solid black;">&nbsp;</td>
+	<td rowspan="3" style="border-top: 1px solid black; border-bottom: 1px solid black;">&nbsp;</td>
+	<td style="padding-top: 0.5em; padding-bottom: 0.5em;"><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Yes, but I don't reject Charcot's labour.
+I know him also, I am only repeating what Li&eacute;bault
+told me&nbsp;&hellip;</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+	<td rowspan="2" style="border-right: 1px solid black;">&nbsp;</td>
+	<td style="padding-top: 0.5em; padding-bottom: 0.5em;"><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN</span> [<i>excitedly</i>] There are 3000 patients in
+the Salp&ecirc;tri&egrave;re, and I have gone through the whole
+course.</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+	<td style="padding-top: 0.5em; padding-bottom: 0.5em; border-bottom: 0px solid white;"><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Excuse me, gentlemen, but that is not
+the point.</td>
+</tr>
+</table>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY</span> [<i>interrupting</i>] One moment, I will explain it to
+you in two words? When my husband was ill, all the
+doctors gave him up&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> However, we had better go upstairs
+again. Baroness, this way!</p>
+
+<p><i>Exeunt Grossman, Sah&aacute;tof, Professor, Doctor, the Fat Lady,
+and Baroness, talking loudly and interrupting each other.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>catching hold of Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch's arm</i>]
+How often have I asked you not to interfere in household
+matters! You think of nothing but your nonsense, and
+the whole house is on my shoulders. You will infect us all!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> What? How? I don't understand
+what you mean.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> How? Why, people ill of diphtheria
+sleep in the kitchen, which is in constant communication
+with the whole house.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, but I&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> What, I?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> I know nothing about it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> It's your duty to know, if you are the
+head of the family. Such things must not be done.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> But I never thought &hellip; I thought&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> It is sickening to listen to you! [<i>Leon&iacute;d
+Fy&oacute;doritch remains silent</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>to Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch</i>] Turn them out at
+once! They are to leave my kitchen immediately! It is
+terrible! No one listens to me; they do it out of <ins title="spite. ..">spite.&hellip;</ins>
+I turn them out from there, and they bring them in
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_184">184</a></span>here! And with my illness&nbsp;&hellip; [<i>Gets more and more excited,
+and at last begins to cry</i>] Doctor! Doctor! Peter
+Petr&oacute;vitch!&hellip; He's gone <ins title="too!. .">too!&hellip;</ins> [<i>Exit, sobbing,
+followed by Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>All stand silent for a long time.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> Botheration take them all! If one don't
+mind, the police will be after one here. And I have never
+been to law in all my born days. Let's go to some lodging-house,
+lads!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>to T&aacute;nya</i>] What are we to do?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Never mind, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, let them sleep
+with the coachman.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> How can we do that? The coachman
+was complaining as it is, that his place is full of dogs.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well then, the porter's lodge.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> And supposing it's found out?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> It won't be found out! Don't trouble about
+that, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch. How can one turn them out
+now, at night? They'll not find anywhere to go to.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Well, do as you please. Only they
+must go away from here. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Peasants take their bags.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DISCHARGED COOK.</span> Oh those damned fiends! It's all
+their fat! Fiends!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SERVANTS' COOK.</span> You be quiet there. Thank goodness
+they didn't see you!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well then, daddy, come along to the porter's lodge.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Well, but how about our business? How,
+for example, about the applience of his hand to the signature?
+May we be in hopes?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> We'll see in an hour's time.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> You'll do the trick?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>laughs</i>] Yes, God willing!</p>
+
+<p class="center curtain"><i>Curtain.</i></p>
+
+
+
+<div class="new-h2">&nbsp;</div>
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_185">185</a></span></p>
+<h2>ACT III</h2>
+
+<p class="scene">Evening of the same day. The small drawing-room in
+Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch's house, where the s&eacute;ances are always held.
+Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch and the Professor.</p>
+
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Well then, shall we risk a s&eacute;ance
+with our new medium?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Yes, certainly. He is a powerful medium,
+there is no doubt about it. And it is especially desirable
+that the s&eacute;ance should take place to-day with the
+same people. Grossman will certainly respond to the
+influence of the mediumistic energy, and then the connection
+and identity of the different phenomena will
+be still more evident. You will see then that, if the
+medium is as strong as he was just now, Grossman will
+vibrate.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Then I will send for Simon and ask
+those who wish to attend to come in.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Yes, all right! I will just jot down a few
+notes. [<i>Takes out his note-book and writes</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Sah&aacute;tof.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> They have just settled down to whist in Anna
+P&aacute;vlovna's drawing-room, and as I am not wanted there&mdash;and
+as I am interested in your s&eacute;ance&mdash;I have put in
+an appearance here. But will there be a s&eacute;ance?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, certainly!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> In spite of the absence of Mr. Kaptch&iacute;tch's
+mediumistic powers?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Vous avez la main heureuse.</i><a name="FNanchor_11_11" href="#Footnote_11_11" class="fnanchor">[11]</a> Fancy,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_186">186</a></span>that very peasant whom I mentioned to you this morning,
+turns out to be an undoubted medium.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Dear me! Yes, that is peculiarly interesting!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, we tried a few preliminary
+experiments with him just after dinner.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> So you've had time already to experiment, and
+to convince yourself&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, perfectly! And he turns out
+to be an exceptionally powerful medium.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>incredulously</i>] Dear me!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> It turns out that it has long been
+noticed in the servants' hall. When he sits down to table,
+the spoon springs into his hand of its own accord! [<i>To
+the Professor</i>] Had you heard about it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> No, I had not heard that detail.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>to the Professor</i>]. But still, you admit the possibility
+of such phenomena?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> What phenomena?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Well, spiritualistic, mediumistic, and supernatural
+phenomena in general.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> The question is, what do we consider supernatural?
+When, not a living man but a piece of stone
+attracted a nail to itself, how did the phenomena strike the
+first observers? As something natural? Or supernatural?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Well, of course; but phenomena such as the
+magnet attracting iron always repeat themselves.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> It is just the same in this case. The phenomenon
+repeats itself and we experiment with it. And
+not only that, but we apply to the phenomena we are
+investigating the laws common to other phenomena.
+These phenomena seem supernatural only because their
+causes are attributed to the medium himself. But that
+is where the mistake lies. The phenomena are not caused
+by the medium, but by psychic energy acting through a
+medium, and that is a very different thing. The whole
+matter lies in the law of equivalents.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_187">187</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Yes, certainly, but&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter T&aacute;nya, who hides behind the hangings.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Only remember that we cannot
+reckon on any results with certainty, with this medium
+any more than with Home or Kaptch&iacute;tch. We may not
+succeed, but on the other hand we may even have perfect
+materialisation.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Materialisation even? What do you mean by
+materialisation?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Why, I mean that some one who is
+dead&mdash;say, your father or your grandfather&mdash;may appear,
+take you by the hand, or give you something; or else
+some one may suddenly rise into the air, as happened to
+Alex&eacute;y Vlad&iacute;miritch last time.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Of course, of course. But the chief thing
+is the explanation of the phenomena, and the application
+to them of general laws.</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter the Fat Lady.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Anna P&aacute;vlovna has allowed me to join you.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Very pleased.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Oh, how tired Grossman seems! He could
+scarcely hold his cup. Did you notice [<i>to the Professor</i>]
+how pale he turned at the moment he approached the
+hiding-place? I noticed it at once, and was the first to
+mention it to Anna P&aacute;vlovna.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Undoubtedly,&mdash;loss of vital energy.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Yes, it's just as I say, one should not abuse
+that sort of thing. You know, a hypnotist once suggested
+to a friend of mine, V&eacute;ra K&oacute;nshin (oh, you know her,
+of course)&mdash;well, he suggested that she should leave off
+smoking,&mdash;and her back began to ache!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>trying to have his say</i>] The temperature and
+the pulse clearly indicate&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> One moment! Allow me! Well, I said to
+her: it's better to smoke than to suffer so with one's nerves.
+Of course, smoking is injurious; I should like to give it
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_188">188</a></span>up myself, but, do what I will, I can't! Once I managed
+not to smoke for a fortnight, but could hold out no longer.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>again trying to speak</i>] Clearly proves&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Yes, no! Allow me, just one word! You
+say, &ldquo;loss of strength.&rdquo; And I was also going to say that,
+when I travelled with post-horses &hellip; the roads used
+to be dreadful in those days&mdash;you don't remember&mdash;but I
+have noticed that all our nervousness comes from railways!
+I, for instance, can't sleep while travelling; I
+cannot fall asleep to save my life!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>makes another attempt, which the Fat Lady
+baffles</i>] The loss of strength&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>smiling</i>] Yes; oh yes!</p>
+
+<p><i>Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch rings.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> I am awake one night, and another, and a
+third, and still I can't sleep!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Gregory.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Please tell Theodore to get everything
+ready for the s&eacute;ance, and send Simon here&mdash;Simon,
+the butler's assistant,&mdash;do you hear?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Yes, sir. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>to Sah&aacute;tof</i>]. The observation of the temperature
+and the pulse have shown loss of vital
+energy. The same will happen in consequence of the
+mediumistic phenomena. The law of the conservation of
+energy&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Oh yes, yes; I was just going to say that I
+am very glad that a simple peasant turns out to be a
+medium. That's very good. I always did say that the
+Slavophils&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Let's go into the drawing-room in
+the meantime.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Allow me, just one word! The Slavophils
+are right; but I always told my husband that one ought
+never to exaggerate anything! &ldquo;The golden mean,&rdquo; you
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_189">189</a></span>know. What is the use of maintaining that the common
+people are all perfect, when I have myself seen&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Won't you come into the drawing-room?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> A boy&mdash;that high&mdash;who drank! I gave him a
+scolding at once. And he was grateful to me afterwards.
+They are children, and, as I always say, children need
+both love and severity!</p>
+
+<p><i>Exeunt all, all talking together.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya enters from behind the hangings.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Oh, if it would only succeed! [<i>Begins fastening
+some threads</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Betsy hurriedly.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Isn't papa here? [<i>Looks inquiringly at T&aacute;nya</i>]
+What are you doing here?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Oh, Miss Elizabeth, I have only just come; I
+only wished &hellip; only came in&nbsp;&hellip; [<i>Embarrassed</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> But they are going to have a s&eacute;ance here
+directly. [<i>Notices T&aacute;nya drawing in the threads, looks at her,
+and suddenly bursts out laughing</i>] T&aacute;nya! Why, it's you who
+do it all? Now don't deny it. And last time it was you
+too? Yes, it was, it was!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Miss Elizabeth, dearest!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span> [<i>delighted</i>] Oh, that is a joke! Well, I never.
+But why do you do it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Oh miss, dear miss, don't betray me!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Not for the world! I'm awfully glad. Only
+tell me how you manage it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well, I just hide, and then, when it's all dark, I
+come out and do it. That's how.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span> [<i>pointing to threads</i>] And what is this for? You
+needn't tell me. I see; you draw&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Miss Elizabeth, darling! I will confess it, but
+only to you. I used to do it just for fun, but now I mean
+business.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> What? How? What business?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_190">190</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well, you see, those peasants that came this
+morning, you saw them. They want to buy some land,
+and your father won't sell it; well, and Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch,
+he says it's the spirits as forbid him. So I have had a
+thought as&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Oh, I see! Well, you are a clever girl! Do it,
+do it.&hellip; But how will you manage it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well, I thought, when they put out the lights,
+I'll at once begin knocking and shying things about,
+touching their heads with the threads, and at last I'll
+take the paper about the land and throw it on the table.
+I've got it here.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Well, and then?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Why, don't you see? They will be astonished.
+The peasants had the paper, and now it's here. I will
+teach&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Why, of course! Simon is the medium to-day!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well, I'll teach him&nbsp;&hellip; [<i>Laughs so that she
+can't continue</i>] I'll tell him to squeeze with his hands any
+one he can get hold of! Of course, not your father&mdash;he'd
+never dare do that&mdash;but any one else; he'll squeeze till
+it's signed.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span> [<i>laughing</i>] But that's not the way it is done.
+Mediums never do anything themselves.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Oh, never mind. It's all one; I daresay it'll
+turn out all right.</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>Exit Betsy, making signs to T&aacute;nya.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Why are you here?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> It's you I want, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, dear&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Well, what is it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> About that affair of mine as I spoke of.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>laughs</i>] I've made the match; yes,
+I've made the match. The matter is settled; we have
+shaken hands on it, only not had a drink on it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_191">191</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>with a shriek</i>] Never! So it's all right?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Don't I tell you so? He says, &ldquo;I
+shall consult the missus, and then, God willing&nbsp;&hellip;&rdquo;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Is that what he said? [<i>Shrieks</i>] Dear Theodore
+Iv&aacute;nitch, I'll pray for you all the days of my life!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> All right! All right! Now is not
+the time. I've been ordered to arrange the room for the
+s&eacute;ance.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Let me help you. How's it to be arranged?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> How? Why, the table in the
+middle of the room&mdash;chairs&mdash;the guitar&mdash;the accordion.
+The lamp is not wanted, only candles.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>helps Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch to place the things</i>] Is that
+right? The guitar here, and here the inkstand. [<i>Places
+it</i>] So?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Can it be true that they'll make
+Simon sit here?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I suppose so; they've done it once.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Wonderful! [<i>Puts on his pince-nez</i>]
+But is he clean?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> How should I know?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Then, I'll tell you <ins title="what . .">what&nbsp;&hellip;</ins></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Yes, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Go and take a nail-brush and some
+Pears' soap; you may take mine &hellip; and go and cut his
+claws and scrub his hands as clean as possible.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> He can do it himself.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Well then, tell him to. And tell
+him to put on a clean shirt as well.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> All right, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>sits down in an easy-chair</i>] They're
+educated and learned&mdash;Alex&eacute;y Vlad&iacute;miritch now, he's a
+professor&mdash;and yet sometimes one can't help doubting
+very much. The people's rude superstitions are being
+abolished: hobgoblins, sorcerers, witches.&hellip; But if one
+considers it, is not this equally superstitious? How is it
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_192">192</a></span>possible that the souls of the dead should come and talk,
+and play the guitar? No! Some one is fooling them, or
+they are fooling themselves. And as to this business with
+Simon&mdash;it's simply incomprehensible. [<i>Looks at an album</i>]
+Here's their spiritualistic album. How is it possible to
+photograph a spirit? But here is the likeness of a Turk
+and Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch sitting by.&hellip; Extraordinary
+human weakness!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Is it all ready?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>rising leisurely</i>] Quite ready. [<i>Smiles</i>]
+Only I don't know about your new medium. I hope he
+won't disgrace you, Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> No, I and Alex&eacute;y Vlad&iacute;miritch have
+tested him. He is a wonderfully powerful medium!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Well, I don't know. But is he
+clean enough? I don't suppose you have thought of
+ordering him to wash his hands? It might be rather
+inconvenient.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> His hands? Oh yes! They're not
+clean, you think?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> What can you expect? He's a
+peasant, and there will be ladies present, and M&aacute;rya
+Vas&iacute;levna.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> It will be all right.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> And then I have something to report
+to you. Timothy, the coachman, complains that he can't
+keep things clean because of the dogs.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>arranging the things on the table absent-mindedly</i>]
+What dogs?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> The three hounds that came for
+Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch to-day.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>vexed</i>] Tell Anna P&aacute;vlovna! She
+can do as she likes about it. I have no time.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> But you know her weakness&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> 'Tis just as she likes, let her do as
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_193">193</a></span>she pleases. As for him,&mdash;one never gets anything but
+unpleasantness from him. Besides, I am busy.</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Simon, smiling; he has a sleeveless peasant's coat on.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> I was ordered to come.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, it's all right. Let me see your
+hands. That will do, that will do very well! Well then,
+my good fellow, you must do just as you did before,&mdash;sit
+down, and give way to your mood. But don't think at all.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Why should I think? The more one thinks,
+the worse it is.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Just so, just so, exactly! The less
+conscious one is, the greater is the power. Don't think,
+but give in to your mood. If you wish to sleep, sleep; if
+you wish to walk, walk. Do you understand?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> How could one help understanding? It's simple
+enough.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> But above all, don't be frightened.
+Because you might be surprised yourself. You must
+understand that just as we live here, so a whole world of
+invisible spirits live here also.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>improving on what Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch
+has said</i>] Invisible feelings, do you understand?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON</span> [<i>laughs</i>] How can one help understanding! It's
+very plain as you put it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> You may rise up in the air, or something
+of the kind, but don't be frightened.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Why should I be frightened? That won't matter
+at all.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Well then, I'll go and call them
+all.&hellip; Is everything ready?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> I think so.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> But the slates?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> They are downstairs. I'll bring
+them. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> All right then. So don't be afraid,
+but be at your ease.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_194">194</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Had I not better take off my coat? One would
+be more easy like.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Your coat? Oh no. Don't take
+that off. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> She tells me to do the same again, and she will
+again shy things about. How isn't she afraid?</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter T&aacute;nya in her stockings and in a dress of the colour of
+the wall-paper. Simon laughs.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Shsh!&hellip; They'll hear! There, stick these
+matches on your fingers as before. [<i>Sticks them on</i>] Well,
+do you remember everything?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON</span> [<i>bending his fingers in, one by one</i>] First of all, wet
+the matches and wave my hands about, that's one. Then
+make my teeth chatter, like this &hellip; that's two. But
+I've forgotten the third thing.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> And it's the third as is the chief thing. Don't
+forget as soon as the paper falls on the table&mdash;I shall
+ring the little bell&mdash;then you do like this.&hellip; Spread
+your arms out far and catch hold of some one, whoever
+it is as sits nearest, and catch hold of him. And then
+squeeze! [<i>Laughs</i>] Whether it's a gentleman or a lady, it's
+all one; you just squeeze 'em, and don't let 'em go,&mdash;as if
+it were in your sleep, and chatter with your teeth, or else
+howl like this. [<i>Howls sotto-voce</i>] And when I begin to play
+on the guitar, then stretch yourself as if you were waking
+up, you know.&hellip; Will you remember everything?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Yes, I'll remember, but it is too funny.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> But mind you don't laugh. Still, it won't
+matter much if you do laugh; they'd think it was in your
+sleep. Only take care you don't really fall asleep when
+they put out the lights.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> No fear, I'll pinch my ears.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Well then Sim darling, only mind do as I tell
+you, and don't get frightened. He'll sign the paper, see
+if he don't! They're coming!</p>
+
+<p><i>Gets under the sofa.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_195">195</a></span>
+<i>Enter Grossman and the Professor, Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch and
+the Fat Lady, the Doctor, Sah&aacute;tof and Anna P&aacute;vlovna. Simon
+stands near the door.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Please come in, all you doubters!
+Though we have a new and accidentally discovered
+medium, I expect very important phenomena to-night.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> That's very, very interesting.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY</span> [<i>pointing to Simon</i>] <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Mais il est tr&egrave;s bien!</i><a name="FNanchor_12_12" href="#Footnote_12_12" class="fnanchor">[12]</a></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Yes, as a butler's assistant, but hardly&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Wives never have any faith in their husbands'
+work. You don't believe in anything of this kind?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Of course not. Kaptch&iacute;tch, it is true,
+has something exceptional about him, but Heaven knows
+what all this is about!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> No, Anna P&aacute;vlovna, permit me, you can't
+decide it in such a way. Before I was married, I once
+had a remarkable dream. Dreams, you know, are often
+such that you don't know where they begin and where
+they end; it was just such a dream that I&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch and Petr&iacute;stchef.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> And much was revealed to me by that dream.
+Nowadays the young people [<i>points to Petr&iacute;stchef and Vas&iacute;ly
+Leon&iacute;ditch</i>] deny everything.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> But look here, you know&mdash;now I,
+for instance, never deny anything! Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><i>Betsy and M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna enter, and begin talking to
+Petr&iacute;stchef.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> And how can one deny the supernatural?
+They say it is unreasonable. But what if one's reason
+is stupid; what then? There now, on Garden Street, you
+know &hellip; why, well, it appeared every evening! My
+husband's brother&mdash;what do you call him? Not <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">beau-fr&egrave;re</i>&mdash;what's
+the other name for it?&mdash;I never can remember
+the names of these different relationships&mdash;well, he went
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_196">196</a></span>there three nights running, and still he saw nothing; so
+I said to him&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Well, who is going to stay here?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> I! I!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> I.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>to Doctor</i>] Do you mean to say you are
+going to stay?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> Yes; I must see, if only once, what it is that
+Alex&eacute;y Vlad&iacute;miritch has discovered in it. How can we
+deny anything without proofs?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Then I am to take it to-night for
+certain?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> Take what?&hellip; Oh, the powder. Yes, it
+would perhaps be better. Yes, yes, take it.&hellip; However,
+I shall come upstairs again.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Yes please, do. [<i>Loud</i>] When it is
+over, <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">mesdames et messieurs</i>, I shall expect you to come to
+me upstairs to rest from your emotions, and then we
+will finish our rubber.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Oh, certainly.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Yes, thanks!</p>
+
+<p><i>Exit Anna P&aacute;vlovna.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span> [<i>to Petr&iacute;stchef</i>] You must stay, I tell you. I promise
+you something extraordinary. Will you bet?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA.</span> But you don't believe in it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> To-day I do.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA</span> [<i>to Petr&iacute;stchef</i>] And do you believe?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> &ldquo;I can't believe, I cannot trust a heart
+for falsehood framed.&rdquo; Still, if Elizabeth Leon&iacute;dovna
+commands&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Let us stay, M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna.
+Eh, what? I shall invent something <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr"><ins title="&eacute;p&acirc;tant">&eacute;patant</ins></i>.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">M&Aacute;RYA KONSTANT&Iacute;NOVNA.</span> No, you mustn't make me laugh.
+You know I can't restrain myself.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH</span> [<i>loud</i>] I remain!</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_197">197</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>severely</i>] But I beg those who remain
+not to joke about it. It is a serious matter.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Do you hear? Well then, let's stay.
+Vovo, sit here, and don't be too shy.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Yes, it's all very well for you to laugh; but just
+wait till you see what will happen.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Oh, but supposing it's true? Won't
+it be a go! Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF</span> [<i>trembles</i>] Oh, I'm afraid, I'm afraid! M&aacute;rya
+<ins title="Konstant&iacute;nova">Konstant&iacute;novna</ins>, I'm afraid! My tootsies tremble.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span> [<i>laughing</i>] Not so loud.</p>
+
+<p><i>All sit down.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Take your seats, take your seats.
+Simon, sit down!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Yes, sir. [<i>Sits down on the edge of the chair</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Sit properly.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Sit straight in the middle of the chair, and
+quite at your ease. [<i>Arranges Simon on his chair</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Betsy, M&aacute;rya Konstant&iacute;novna and Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch laugh.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>raising his voice</i>] I beg those who
+are going to remain here not to behave frivolously, but to
+regard this matter seriously, or bad results might follow.
+Do you hear, Vovo! If you can't be quiet, go away!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Quite quiet! [<i>Hides behind Fat Lady</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Alex&eacute;y Vlad&iacute;miritch, will you mesmerise
+him?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> No; why should I do it when Ant&oacute;n Bor&iacute;sitch
+is here? He has had far more practice and has more
+power in that department than I.&hellip; Ant&oacute;n Bor&iacute;sitch!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN.</span> Ladies and gentlemen, I am not, strictly
+speaking, a spiritualist. I have only studied hypnotism. It
+is true I have studied hypnotism in all its known manifestations;
+but what is called spiritualism, is entirely unknown
+to me. When a subject is thrown into a trance, I may
+expect the hypnotic phenomena known to me: lethargy,
+abulia, an&aelig;sthesia, analgesia, catalepsy, and every kind of
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_198">198</a></span>susceptibility to suggestion. Here it is not these but
+other phenomena we expect to observe. Therefore it
+would be well to know of what kind are the phenomena
+we expect to witness, and what is their scientific significance.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> I thoroughly agree with Mr. Grossman. Such
+an explanation would be very interesting.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> I think Alex&eacute;y Vlad&iacute;miritch will
+not refuse to give us a short explanation.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Why not? I can give an explanation if it is
+desired. [<i>To the Doctor</i>] Will you kindly note his temperature
+and pulse? My explanation must, of necessity, be
+cursory and brief.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, please; briefly, quite briefly.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> All right. [<i>Takes out thermometer</i>] Now then,
+my lad&nbsp;&hellip; [<i>Places the thermometer</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Yes, sir!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>rising and addressing the Fat Lady&mdash;then
+reseating himself</i>] Ladies and gentlemen! The phenomenon
+we are investigating to-night is regarded, on the
+one hand, as something new; and, on the other, as
+something transcending the limits of natural conditions.
+Neither view is correct. This phenomenon is not new
+but is as old as the world; and it is not supernatural but
+is subject to the eternal laws that govern all that exists.
+This phenomenon has been usually defined as &ldquo;intercourse
+with the spirit world.&rdquo; That definition is inexact.
+Under such a definition the spirit world is contrasted with
+the material world. But this is erroneous; there is
+no such contrast! Both worlds are so closely connected
+that it is impossible to draw a line of demarcation, separating
+the one from the other. We say, matter is composed
+of molecules&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Prosy matter! [<i>Whispering and laughter</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>pauses, then continues</i>] Molecules are composed
+of atoms, but the atoms, having no extension, are
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_199">199</a></span>in reality nothing but the points of application of forces.
+Strictly speaking, not of forces but of energy, that same
+energy which is as much a unity and just as indestructible
+as matter. But matter, though one, has many different
+aspects, and the same is true of energy. Till recently
+only four forms of energy, convertible into one another,
+have been known to us: energies known as the dynamic,
+the thermal, the electric, and the chemic. But these four
+aspects of energy are far from exhausting all the varieties
+of its manifestation. The forms in which energy may
+manifest itself are very diverse, and it is one of these new
+and as yet but little known phases of energy, that we are
+investigating to-night. I refer to mediumistic energy.</p>
+
+<p><i>Renewed whispering and laughter among the young people.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>stops and casts a severe look round</i>] Mediumistic
+energy has been known to mankind for ages: prophecy,
+presentiments, visions and so on, are nothing but manifestations
+of mediumistic energy. The manifestations produced
+by it have, I say, been known to mankind for ages.
+But the energy itself has not been recognised as such till
+quite recently&mdash;not till that medium, the vibrations of
+which cause the manifestations of mediumistic energy,
+was recognised. In the same way that the phenomena
+of light were inexplicable until the existence of an
+imponderable substance&mdash;an ether&mdash;was recognised, so
+mediumistic phenomena seemed mysterious until the now
+fully established fact was recognised, that between the
+particles of ether there exists another still more rarified
+imponderable substance not subject to the law of the
+three dimensions&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><i>Renewed laughter, whispers, and giggling.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>again looks round severely</i>] And just as mathematical
+calculations have irrefutably proved the existence
+of imponderable ether which gives rise to the phenomena
+of light and electricity, so the successive investigations
+of the ingenious Hermann, of Schmidt, and of Joseph
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_200">200</a></span>Schmatzhofen, have confirmed beyond a doubt the existence
+of a substance which fills the universe and may be called
+spiritual ether.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Ah, now I understand. I am so grateful&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, but Alex&eacute;y Vlad&iacute;miritch, could
+you not &hellip; condense it a little?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>not heeding the remark</i>] And so, as I have just
+had the honour of mentioning to you, a succession of strictly
+scientific experiments have made plain to us the laws of
+mediumistic phenomena. These experiments have proved
+that, when certain individuals are plunged into a hypnotic
+state (a state differing from ordinary sleep only by the
+fact that man's physiological activity is not lowered by the
+hypnotic influence but, on the contrary, is always heightened&mdash;as
+we have recently witnessed) when, I say, any
+individual is plunged into such a state, this always produces
+certain perturbations in the spiritual ether&mdash;perturbations
+quite similar to those produced by plunging a solid
+body into liquid matter. These perturbations are what we
+call mediumistic phenomena&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><i>Laughter, and whispers.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> That is quite comprehensible and correct; but
+if, as you are kind enough to inform us, the plunging of
+the medium into a trance produces perturbations of the
+spiritual ether, allow me to ask why (as is usually supposed
+to be the case in spiritualistic s&eacute;ances) these perturbations
+result in an activity on the part of the souls of dead
+people?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> It is because the molecules of this spiritual
+ether are nothing but the souls of the living, the dead,
+and the unborn, and any vibration of the spiritual ether
+must inevitably cause a certain vibration of its atoms.
+These atoms are nothing but human souls, which enter
+into communication with one another by means of these
+movements.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_201">201</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">FAT LADY</span> [<i>to Sah&aacute;tof</i>] What is it that puzzles you? It
+is so simple.&hellip; Thank you so, so much!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> I think everything has now been
+explained, and that we may commence.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> The fellow is in a perfectly normal condition:
+temperature 37 decimal 2, pulse 74.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>takes out his pocket-book and notes this down</i>]
+What I have just had the honour of explaining will be
+confirmed by the fact, which we shall presently have an
+opportunity of observing, that after the medium has been
+thrown into a trance his temperature and pulse will inevitably
+rise, just as occurs in cases of hypnotism.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, yes. But excuse me a moment.
+I should like to reply to Serg&eacute;y Iv&aacute;nitch's question: How
+do we know we are in communication with the souls of
+the dead? We know it because the spirit that appears,
+plainly tells us&mdash;as simply as I am speaking to you&mdash;who
+he is, and why he has come, and whether all is well with
+him! At our last s&eacute;ance a Spaniard, Don Castillos, came
+to us, and he told us everything. He told us who he was,
+and when he died, and that he was suffering for having
+taken part in the Inquisition. He even told us what was
+happening to him at the very time that he was speaking
+to us, namely, that at the very time he was talking to us
+he had to be born again on earth, and, therefore, could
+not continue his conversation with us.&hellip; But you'll see
+for yourselves&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY</span> [<i>interrupting</i>] Oh, how interesting! Perhaps the
+Spaniard was born in one of our houses and is a baby now!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Quite possibly.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> I think it is time we began.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> I was only going to say&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> It is getting late.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Very well. Then we will commence.
+Ant&oacute;n Bor&iacute;sitch, be so good as to hypnotise the
+medium.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_202">202</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">GROSSMAN.</span> What method would you like me to use?
+There are several methods. There is Braid's system,
+there is the Egyptian symbol, and there is Charcot's
+system.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>to the Professor</i>] I think it is quite
+immaterial.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Quite.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN.</span> Then I will make use of my own method,
+which I showed in Odessa.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> If you please!</p>
+
+<p><i>Grossman waves his arms above Simon. Simon closes his
+eyes and stretches himself.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN</span> [<i>looking closely at him</i>] He is falling asleep!
+He is asleep! A remarkably rapid occurrence of hypnosis.
+The subject has evidently already reached a state
+of an&aelig;sthesia. He is remarkable,&mdash;an unusually impressionable
+subject, and might be subjected to interesting
+experiments!&hellip; [<i>Sits down, rises, sits down again</i>]
+Now one might run a needle into his arm. If you
+like&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>to Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch</i>] Do you notice how the
+medium's trance acts on Grossman? He is beginning to
+vibrate.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, yes &hellip; can the lights be extinguished
+now?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> But why is darkness necessary?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Darkness? Because it is a condition of the
+manifestation of mediumistic energy, just as a given
+temperature is a condition necessary for certain manifestations
+of chemical or dynamic energy.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> But not always. Manifestations
+have been observed by me, and by many others, both by
+candlelight and daylight.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>interrupting</i>] May the lights be put out?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, certainly. [<i>Puts out candles</i>]
+Ladies and gentlemen! attention, if you please.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_203">203</a></span>
+<i>T&aacute;nya gets from under the sofa and takes hold of a thread
+tied to a chandelier.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> I like that Spaniard! Just in the midst
+of a conversation&mdash;off he goes head downwards &hellip; as
+the French say: <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">piquer une t&ecirc;te</i>.<a name="FNanchor_13_13" href="#Footnote_13_13" class="fnanchor">[13]</a></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> You just wait a bit, and see what will happen!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> I have only one fear, and that is that Vovo
+may be moved by the spirit to grunt like a pig!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Would you like me to? I will&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Gentlemen! Silence, if you please!</p>
+
+<p><i>Silence. Simon licks the matches on his fingers and rubs his
+knuckles with them.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> A light! Do you see the light?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> A light? Yes, yes, I see; but allow me&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Where? Where? Oh dear, I did not see
+it! Ah, there it is. Oh!&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>whispers to Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch, and points to
+Grossman, who is moving</i>] Do you notice how he vibrates?
+It is the dual influence. [<i>The light appears again</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>to the Professor</i>] It must be he&mdash;you
+know!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Who?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> A Greek, Nicholas. It is his light.
+Don't you think so, Alex&eacute;y Vlad&iacute;miritch?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Who is this Greek, Nicholas?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> A certain Greek, who was a monk at Constantinople
+under Constantine and who has been visiting
+us lately.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Where is he? Where is he? I don't see
+him.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> He is not yet visible &hellip; Alex&eacute;y
+Vlad&iacute;miritch, he is particularly well disposed towards you.
+You question him.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>in a peculiar voice</i>] Nicholas! Is that you?</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya raps twice on the wall.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_204">204</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>joyfully</i>] It is he! It is he!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Oh dear! Oh! I shall go away!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Why do you suppose it is he?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Why, the two knocks. It is an
+affirmative answer; else all would have been silence.</p>
+
+<p><i>Silence. Suppressed giggling in the young people's corner.
+T&aacute;nya throws a lampshade, pencil and penwiper upon the
+table.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>whispers</i>] Do you notice, gentlemen,
+here is a lamp-shade, and something else&mdash;a pencil!&hellip;
+Alex&eacute;y Vlad&iacute;miritch, it is a pencil!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> All right, all right! I am watching both
+him and Grossman!</p>
+
+<p><i>Grossman rises and feels the things that have fallen on the
+table.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Excuse me, excuse me! I should like to see
+whether it is not the medium who is doing it all himself?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Do you think so? Well, sit by him
+and hold his hands. But you may be sure he is asleep.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>approaches. T&aacute;nya lets a thread touch his head.
+He is frightened, and stoops</i>]. Ye &hellip; ye &hellip; yes! Strange,
+very strange! [<i>Takes hold of Simon's elbow. Simon howls</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>to Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch</i>] Do you notice the
+effect of Grossman's presence? It is a new phenomenon&mdash;I
+must note it&nbsp;&hellip; [<i>Runs out to note it down, and returns
+again</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes.&hellip; But we cannot leave
+Nicholas without an answer. We must begin&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN</span> [<i>rises, approaches Simon and raises and lowers his
+arm</i>] It would be interesting to produce contraction! The
+subject is in profound hypnosis.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>to Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch</i>] Do you see? Do you
+see?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN.</span> If you like&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR.</span> Now then, my dear sir, leave the management
+to Alex&eacute;y Vlad&iacute;miritch, the affair is turning out serious.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_205">205</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Leave him alone, he [<i>referring to Grossman</i>]
+is talking in his sleep!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> How glad I now am that I resolved to be
+present! It is frightening, but all the same I am glad, for
+I always said to my husband&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Silence, if you please.</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya draws a thread over the Fat Lady's head.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Aie!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> What? What is it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> He took hold of my hair!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>whispers</i>] Never mind, don't be
+afraid, give him your hand. His hand will be cold, but I
+like it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY</span> [<i>hides her hands</i>] Not for the world!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Yes, it is strange, very strange!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> He is here and is seeking for intercourse.
+Who wishes to put a question to him?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> I should like to put a question, if I may.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Please do.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Do I believe or not?</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya knocks twice.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> The answer is affirmative.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Allow me to ask again. Have I a ten rouble
+note in my pocket?</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya knocks several times and passes a thread over
+Sah&aacute;tof's head.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Ah! [<i>Seizes the thread and breaks it</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> I should ask those present not to ask indefinite
+or trivial questions. It is unpleasant to <em>him</em>!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> No, but allow me! Here I have a thread in my
+hand!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> A thread? Hold it fast; that
+happens often, and not only threads but sometimes even
+silk cords&mdash;very ancient ones!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> No&mdash;but where did this thread come from?</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya throws a cushion at him.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_206">206</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> Wait a bit; wait! Something soft has hit me
+on the head. Light a candle&mdash;there is something&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> We beg of you not to interrupt the manifestations.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> For goodness' sake don't interrupt! I should
+also like to ask something. May I?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, if you like.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> I should like to ask about my digestion. May
+I? I want to know what to take: aconite or belladonna?</p>
+
+<p><i>Silence, whispers among the young people; suddenly Vas&iacute;ly
+Leon&iacute;ditch begins to cry like a baby: &ldquo;ou-a, ou-a!&rdquo;
+[Laughter.] Holding their mouths and noses, the girls and
+Petr&iacute;stchef run away bursting with laughter.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Ah, that must be the monk who's been born
+again!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>beside himself with anger, whispers</i>]
+One gets nothing but tomfoolery from you! If you don't
+know how to behave decently, go away!</p>
+
+<p><i>Exit Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch. Darkness and silence.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Oh, what a pity! Now one can't ask any
+more! He is born!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Not at all. It is only Vovo's nonsense.
+But <em>he</em> is here. Ask him.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> That often happens. These jokes and ridicule
+are quite usual occurrences. I expect <em>he</em> is still here.
+But we may ask. Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch, will you?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> No, you, if you please. This has
+upset me. So unpleasant! Such want of tact!&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Very well.&hellip; Nicholas, are you here?</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya raps twice and rings. Simon roars, spreads his arms
+out, seizes Sah&aacute;tof and the Professor&mdash;squeezing them.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> What an unexpected phenomenon! The
+medium himself reacted upon! This never happened
+before! Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch, will you watch? It is difficult
+for me to do so. He squeezes me so! Mind you observe
+Grossman! This needs the very greatest attention!</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_207">207</a></span>
+<i>T&aacute;nya throws the peasants' paper on the table.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Something has fallen upon the table.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> See what it is!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Paper! A folded paper!</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya throws a travelling inkstand on the table.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> An inkstand!</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya throws a pen.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> A pen!</p>
+
+<p><i>Simon roars and squeezes.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>crushed</i>] Wait a bit, wait: a totally new manifestation!
+The action proceeding not from the mediumistic
+energy produced, but from the medium himself! However,
+open the inkstand, and put the pen on the table, and
+<em>he</em> will write!</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya goes behind Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch and strikes him on the
+head with the guitar.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> He has struck me on the head!
+[<i>Examining table</i>] The pen is not writing yet and the paper
+remains folded.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> See what the paper is, and quickly; evidently
+the dual influence&mdash;his and Grossman's&mdash;has produced
+a perturbation!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>goes out and returns at once</i>] Extraordinary!
+This paper is an agreement with some peasants
+that I refused to sign this morning and returned to the
+peasants. Probably <em>he</em> wants me to sign it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Of course! Of course! But ask him.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Nicholas, do you wish&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya knocks twice.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Do you hear? It is quite evident!</p>
+
+<p><i>Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch takes the paper and pen and goes out.
+T&aacute;nya knocks, plays on the guitar and the accordion, and then
+creeps under the sofa. Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch returns. Simon
+stretches himself and coughs.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> He is waking up. We can light
+the candles.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_208">208</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>hurriedly</i>] Doctor, Doctor, please, his pulse
+and temperature! You will see that a rise of both will be
+apparent.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>lights the candles</i>] Well, what do you
+gentlemen who were sceptical think of it now?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR</span> [<i>goes up to Simon and places thermometer</i>] Now
+then my lad. Well, have you had a nap? There, put
+that in there, and give me your hand. [<i>Looks at his
+watch</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>shrugging his shoulders</i>] I must admit that all
+that has occurred cannot have been done by the medium.
+But the thread?&hellip; I should like the thread explained.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> A thread! A thread! We have
+been witnessing manifestations more important than a
+thread.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> I don't know. At all events, <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">je r&eacute;serve mon
+opinion</i>.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY</span> [<i>to Sah&aacute;tof</i>] Oh no, how can you say: &ldquo;<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">je
+r&eacute;serve mon opinion?</i>&rdquo; And the infant with the little
+wings? Didn't you see? At first I thought it was only
+an illusion, but afterwards it became clearer and clearer,
+like a live&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> I can only speak of what I have seen. I did
+not see that&mdash;nothing of the kind.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> You don't mean to say so? Why, it was quite
+plainly visible! And to the left there was a monk clothed
+in black bending over it&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF</span> [<i>moves away. Aside</i>] What exaggeration!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY</span> [<i>addressing the Doctor</i>] You must have seen it!
+It rose up from your side.</p>
+
+<p><i>Doctor goes on counting pulse without heeding her.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY</span> [<i>to Grossman</i>] And that light, the light around
+it, especially around its little face! And the expression so
+mild and tender, something so heavenly! [<i>Smiles tenderly
+herself</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN.</span> I saw phosphorescent light, and objects
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_209">209</a></span>changed their places, but I saw nothing more than
+that.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Don't tell me! You don't mean it! It is
+simply that you scientists of Charcot's school do not believe
+in a life beyond the grave! As for me, no one could
+now make me disbelieve in a future life&mdash;no one in the
+world!</p>
+
+<p><i>Grossman moves away from her.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> No, no, whatever you may say, this is one of
+the happiest moments of my life! When I heard Sarasate
+play, and now.&hellip; Yes! [<i>No one listens to her. She goes
+up to Simon</i>] Now tell me, my friend, what did you feel?
+Was it very trying?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON</span> [<i>laughs</i>] Yes, ma'm, just so.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> Still not unendurable?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Just so, ma'm. [<i>To Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch</i>] Am I to
+go?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, you may go.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOCTOR</span> [<i>to the Professor</i>] The pulse is the same, but the
+temperature is lower.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Lower! [<i>Considers awhile, then suddenly
+divines the conclusion</i>] It had to be so&mdash;it had to descend!
+The dual influence crossing had to produce some kind
+of reflex action. Yes, that's it!</p>
+
+<table class="together" summary="Exeunt, all talking at once">
+<tr>
+	<td rowspan="4" style="width: 6em;"><i>Exeunt, all talking at once.</i></td>
+	<td rowspan="2" style="border-bottom: 1px solid black; border-right: 1px solid black;">&nbsp;</td>
+	<td rowspan="4" style="border-top: 1px solid black; border-bottom: 1px solid black;">&nbsp;</td>
+	<td style="padding-top: 0.5em; padding-bottom: 0.5em;"><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> I'm only sorry we had no complete
+materialisation. But still.&hellip; Come, gentlemen,
+let us go to the drawing-room?</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+	<td style="padding-top: 0.5em; padding-bottom: 0.5em;"><span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> What specially struck me was when he
+flapped his wings, and one saw how he rose!</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+	<td rowspan="2" style="border-right: 1px solid black;">&nbsp;</td>
+	<td style="padding-top: 0.5em; padding-bottom: 0.5em;"><span class="speaker">GROSSMAN</span> [<i>to Sah&aacute;tof</i>] If we had kept to hypnotism,
+we might have produced a thorough state of epilepsy.
+The success might have been complete!</td>
+</tr>
+<tr>
+	<td style="padding-top: 0.5em; padding-bottom: 0.5em; border-bottom: 0px solid white;"><span class="speaker">SAH&Aacute;TOF.</span> It is very interesting, but not entirely
+convincing. That is all I can say.</td>
+</tr>
+</table>
+
+<p><i>Enter Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH</span> [<i>with paper in his hand</i>] Ah, Theodore,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_210">210</a></span>what a remarkable s&eacute;ance we have had! It turns
+out that the peasants must have the land on their own terms.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Dear me!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Yes, indeed. [<i>Showing paper</i>] Fancy,
+this paper that I returned to them, suddenly appeared on
+the table! I have signed it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> How did it get there?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Well, it did get there! [<i><ins title="Exit">Exit,</ins>
+Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch follows him out</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>gets from under the sofa and laughs</i>] Oh dear, oh
+dear! Well, I did get a fright when he got hold of
+the thread! [<i>Shrieks</i>] Well, anyhow, it's all right&mdash;he
+has signed it!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Gregory.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> So it was you that was fooling them?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> What business is it of yours?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> And do you think the missis will be pleased
+with you for it? No, you bet; you're caught now! I'll
+tell them what tricks you're up to, if you don't let me have my way!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> And you'll not get your way, and you'll not do me any harm!</p>
+
+<p class="center curtain"><i>Curtain.</i></p>
+
+
+
+<div class="new-h2">&nbsp;</div>
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_211">211</a></span></p>
+<h2>ACT IV</h2>
+
+<p class="scene">The same scene as in <a href="#act1">Act I</a>. The next day. Two liveried
+footmen, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch and Gregory.</p>
+
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST FOOTMAN</span> [<i>with grey whiskers</i>] Yours is the third
+house to-day. Thank goodness that all the at-homes are
+in this direction. Yours used to be on Thursdays.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Yes, we changed to Saturday so as
+to be on the same day as the Gol&oacute;vkins and Grade von
+Grabes&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND FOOTMAN.</span> The Stcherb&aacute;kofs do the thing well.
+There's refreshments for the footmen every time they've
+a ball.</p>
+
+<p><i>The two Princesses, mother and daughter, come down the
+stairs accompanied by Betsy. The old Princess looks in her
+note-book and at her watch, and sits down on the settle.
+Gregory puts on her overshoes.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">YOUNG PRINCESS.</span> Now, do come. Because, if you refuse,
+and Dodo refuses, the whole thing will be spoilt.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> I don't know. I must certainly go to the
+Sho&uacute;bins. And then there is the rehearsal.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">YOUNG PRINCESS.</span> You'll have plenty of time. Do, please.
+<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Ne nous fais pas faux bond.</i><a name="FNanchor_14_14" href="#Footnote_14_14" class="fnanchor">[14]</a> F&eacute;dya and Koko will come.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">J'en ai par-dessus la t&ecirc;te de votre Koko.</i><a name="FNanchor_15_15" href="#Footnote_15_15" class="fnanchor">[15]</a></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">YOUNG PRINCESS.</span> I thought I should see him here.
+<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Ordinairement il est d'une exactitude&nbsp;&hellip;</i><a name="FNanchor_16_16" href="#Footnote_16_16" class="fnanchor">[16]</a></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> He is sure to come.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_212">212</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">YOUNG PRINCESS.</span> When I see you together, it always
+seems to me that he has either just proposed or is just
+going to propose.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Yes, I don't suppose it can be avoided. I shall
+have to go through with it. And it is so unpleasant!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">YOUNG PRINCESS.</span> Poor Koko! He is head over ears in
+love.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Cessez, les gens!</i><a name="FNanchor_17_17" href="#Footnote_17_17" class="fnanchor">[17]</a></p>
+
+<p><i>Young Princess sits down, talking in whispers. Gregory
+puts on her overshoes.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">YOUNG PRINCESS.</span> Well then, good-bye till this evening.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> I'll try to come.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">OLD PRINCESS.</span> Then tell your papa that I don't believe
+in anything of the kind, but will come to see his new
+medium. Only he must let me know when. Good afternoon,
+<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">ma toute belle</i>. [<i>Kisses Betsy, and exit, followed by her
+daughter. Betsy goes upstairs</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> I don't like putting on an old woman's overshoes
+for her; she can't stoop, can't see her shoe for her
+stomach, and keeps poking her foot in the wrong place.
+It's different with a young one; it's pleasant to take her
+foot in one's hand.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND FOOTMAN.</span> Hear him! Making distinctions!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST FOOTMAN.</span> It's not for us footmen to make such
+distinctions.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Why shouldn't one make distinctions; are
+we not men? It's they think we don't understand!
+Just now they were deep in their talk, then they look at
+me, and at once it's &ldquo;lay zhon!&rdquo;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND FOOTMAN.</span> And what's that?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Oh, that means, &ldquo;Don't talk, they understand!&rdquo;
+It's the same at table. But I understand! You
+say, there's a difference? I say there is none.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST FOOTMAN.</span> There is a great difference for those
+who understand.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_213">213</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> There is none at all. To-day I am a footman,
+and to-morrow I may be living no worse than they are.
+Has it never happened that they've married footmen?
+I'll go and have a smoke. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND FOOTMAN.</span> That's a bold young man you've got.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> A worthless fellow, not fit for
+service. He used to be an office boy and has got spoilt.
+I advised them not to take him, but the mistress liked
+him. He looks well on the carriage when they drive
+out.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST FOOTMAN.</span> I should like to send him to our Count;
+he'd put him in his place! Oh, he don't like those
+scatterbrains. &ldquo;If you're a footman, be a footman and
+fulfil your calling.&rdquo; Such pride is not befitting.</p>
+
+<p><i>Petr&iacute;stchef comes running downstairs, and takes out a
+cigarette.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF</span> [<i>deep in thought</i>] Let's see, my second is
+the same as my first. Echo, a-co, co-coa. [<i>Enter Koko
+Kl&iacute;ngen, wearing his pince-nez</i>] Ko-ko, co-coa. Cocoa
+tin, where do you spring from?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN.</span> From the Stcherb&aacute;kofs. You are always
+playing the fool&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> No, listen to my charade. My first is the
+same as my second, my third may be cracked, my whole is
+like your pate.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN.</span> I give it up. I've no time.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Where else are you going?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN.</span> Where? Of course to the &Iacute;vins, to
+practise for the concert. Then to the Sho&uacute;bins, and then
+to the rehearsal. You'll be there too, won't you?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Most certainly. At the re-her-Sall and
+also at the re-her-Sarah. Why, at first I was a savage,
+and now I am both a savage and a general.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN.</span> How did yesterday's s&eacute;ance go off?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Screamingly funny! There was a peasant,
+and above all, it was all in the dark. Vovo cried like an
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_214">214</a></span>infant, the Professor defined, and M&aacute;rya Vas&iacute;levna refined.
+Such a lark! You ought to have been there.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN.</span> I'm afraid, <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">mon cher</i>. You have a way
+of getting off with a jest, but I always feel that if I
+say a word, they'll construe it into a proposal. <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Et &ccedil;a ne
+m'arrange pas du tout, du tout. Mais du tout, du tout!</i><a name="FNanchor_18_18" href="#Footnote_18_18" class="fnanchor">[18]</a></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Instead of a proposal, make a proposition,
+and receive a sentence! Well, I shall go in to Vovo's.
+If you'll call for me, we can go to the re-her-Sarah
+together.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN.</span> I can't think how you can be friends with
+such a fool. He is so stupid,&mdash;a regular blockhead!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> And I am fond of him. I love Vovo,
+but &hellip; &ldquo;with a love so strange, ne'er towards him the
+path untrod shall be&rdquo;&nbsp;&hellip; [<i>Exit into Vovo's room</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Betsy comes down with a Lady. Koko bows significantly to
+Betsy.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span> [<i>shaking Koko's hand without turning towards him.
+To Lady</i>] You are acquainted?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LADY.</span> No.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Baron Kl&iacute;ngen.&hellip; Why were you not here
+last night?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN.</span> I could not come, I was engaged.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> What a pity, it was so interesting! [<i>Laughs</i>] You
+should have seen what manifestations we had! Well, how
+is our charade getting on?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN.</span> Oh, the verses for <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">mon second</i> are ready.
+Nick composed the verses, and I the music.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> What are they? What are they? Do tell me!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN.</span> Wait a minute; how does it go?&hellip;
+Oh, the knight sings:</p>
+
+<div class="poem" style="width: 18em;"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&ldquo;Oh, <em>naught</em> so beautiful as nature:<br /></span>
+<span class="i1">The <em>Nautilus</em> sails by.<br /></span>
+<span class="i1">Oh, <em>naughty</em> lass, oh, <em>naughty</em> lass!<br /></span>
+<span class="i1">Oh, <em>nought</em>, oh <em>nought</em>! Oh fie!&rdquo;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_215">215</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">LADY.</span> I see, my second is &ldquo;nought,&rdquo; and what is my
+first?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN.</span> My first is <em>Aero</em>, the name of a girl
+savage.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> <em>Aero</em>, you see, is a savage who wished to devour
+the object of her love. [<i>Laughs</i>] She goes about lamenting,
+and sings&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class="poem" style="width: 13em;"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&ldquo;My appetite,&rdquo;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN</span> [<i>interrupts</i>]&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class="poem" style="width: 13em;"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&ldquo;How can I fight,&rdquo;&nbsp;&hellip;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span> [<i>chimes in</i>]&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class="poem" style="width: 13em;"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&ldquo;Some one to chew I long.<br /></span>
+<span class="i1">I seeking go&nbsp;&hellip;&rdquo;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN</span>&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class="poem" style="width: 13em;"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&ldquo;But even so&nbsp;&hellip;&rdquo;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span>&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class="poem" style="width: 13em;"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&ldquo;No one to chew can find.&rdquo;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN</span>&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class="poem" style="width: 13em;"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&ldquo;A raft sails <ins title="by,&rsquo;">by,&rdquo;</ins><br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span>&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class="poem" style="width: 13em;"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&ldquo;It cometh nigh;<br /></span>
+<span class="i1">Two generals upon it&nbsp;&hellip;&rdquo;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN</span>&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class="poem" style="width: 13em;"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&ldquo;Two generals are we:<br /></span>
+<span class="i1">By fate's hard decree,<br /></span>
+<span class="i1">To this island we flee.&rdquo;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p>And then, the refrain&mdash;</p>
+
+<div class="poem" style="width: 13em;"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">&ldquo;By fate's hard decree,<br /></span>
+<span class="i1">To this island we flee.&rdquo;<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LADY.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Charmant!</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> But just think how silly!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">KOKO KL&Iacute;NGEN.</span> Yes, that's the charm of it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LADY.</span> And who is to be Aero?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> I am. And I have had a costume made, but
+mamma says it's &ldquo;not decent.&rdquo; And it is not a bit
+less decent than a ball dress. [<i>To Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch</i>] Is
+Bourdier's man here?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_216">216</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Yes, he is waiting in the kitchen.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LADY.</span> Well, and how will you represent Aeronaut?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Oh, you'll see. I don't want to spoil the pleasure
+for you. <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Au revoir.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LADY.</span> Good-bye! [<i>They bow. Exit Lady</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span> [<i>to Koko Kl&iacute;ngen</i>] Come up to mamma.</p>
+
+<p><i>Betsy and Koko go upstairs. Jacob enters from servants'
+quarters, carrying a tray with teacups, cakes, &amp;c., and goes
+panting across the stage.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB</span> [<i>to the Footmen</i>] How d'you do? How d'you do?
+[<i>Footmen bow</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB</span> [<i>to Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch</i>] Couldn't you tell Gregory
+to help a bit! I'm ready to drop.&hellip; [<i>Exit up the
+stairs</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST FOOTMAN.</span> That is a hard-working chap you've got
+there.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Yes, a good fellow. But there now&mdash;he
+doesn't satisfy the mistress, she says his appearance
+is ungainly. And now they've gone and told tales about
+him for letting some peasants into the kitchen yesterday.
+It is a bad look-out: they may dismiss him. And he is
+a good fellow.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND FOOTMAN.</span> What peasants were they?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Peasants that had come from our
+Koursk village to buy some land. It was night, and they
+were our fellow-countrymen, one of them the father of
+the butler's assistant. Well, so they were asked into the
+kitchen. It so happened that there was thought-reading
+going on. Something was hidden in the kitchen, and
+all the gentlefolk came down, and the mistress saw the
+peasants. There was such a row! &ldquo;How is this,&rdquo; she
+says; &ldquo;these people may be infected, and they are let into
+the kitchen!&rdquo; &hellip; She is terribly afraid of this infection.</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Gregory.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Gregory, you go and help Jacob.
+I'll stay here. He can't manage alone.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_217">217</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> He's awkward, that's why he can't manage.
+[<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST FOOTMAN.</span> And what is this new mania they have
+got? This infection!&hellip; So yours also is afraid of it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> She fears it worse than fire! Our
+chief business, nowadays, is fumigating, washing, and
+sprinkling.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST FOOTMAN.</span> I see. That's why there is such a stuffy
+smell here. [<i>With animation</i>] I don't know what we're
+coming to with these infection notions. It's just detestable!
+They seem to have forgotten the Lord. There's
+our master's sister, Princess Mosol&oacute;va, her daughter was
+dying and, will you believe it, neither father nor mother
+would come near her! So she died without their having
+taken leave of her. And the daughter cried, and called
+them to say good-bye&mdash;but they didn't go! The doctor
+had discovered some infection or other! And yet their
+own maid and a trained nurse were with her, and nothing
+happened to them; they're still alive!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch and Petr&iacute;stchef from Vas&iacute;ly Leon&iacute;ditch's
+room, smoking cigarettes.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Come along then, only I must take Koko&mdash;Cocoanut,
+with me.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> Your Koko is a regular dolt; I can't
+bear him. A hare-brained fellow, a regular gad-about!
+Without any kind of occupation, eternally loafing around!
+Eh, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Well, anyhow, wait a bit, I must say good-bye.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> All right. And I will go and look at
+my dogs in the coachman's room. I've got a dog there
+that's so savage, the coachman said, he nearly ate him.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> Who ate whom? Did the coachman
+really eat the dog?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">VAS&Iacute;LY LEON&Iacute;DITCH.</span> You are always at it! [<i>Puts on outdoor
+things and goes out</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_218">218</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF</span> [<i>thoughtfully</i>] Ma-kin-tosh, Co-co-tin.&hellip;
+Let's see. [<i>Goes upstairs</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Jacob runs across the stage.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> What's the matter?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> There is no more thin bread and butter. I
+said&nbsp;&hellip; [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND FOOTMAN.</span> And then our master's little son fell ill,
+and they sent him at once to an hotel with his nurse, and
+there he died without his mother.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST FOOTMAN.</span> They don't seem to fear sin! <em>I</em> think
+you cannot escape from God anywhere.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> That's what I think.</p>
+
+<p><i>Jacob runs upstairs with bread and butter.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST FOOTMAN.</span> One should consider too, that if we are
+to be afraid of everybody like that, we'd better shut ourselves
+up within four walls, as in a prison, and stick there!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter T&aacute;nya; she bows to the Footmen.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Good afternoon.</p>
+
+<p><i>Footmen bow.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, I have a word to say to you.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Well, what?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> The peasants have come again, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Well? I gave the paper to Simon.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I have given them the paper. They were that
+grateful! I can't say how! Now they only ask you to
+take the money.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> But where are they?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Here, by the porch.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> All right, I'll tell the master.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I have another request to you, dear Theodore
+Iv&aacute;nitch.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> What now?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Why, don't you see, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, I can't
+remain here any longer. Ask them to let me go.</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Jacob, running.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_219">219</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>to Jacob</i>] What d'you want?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Another samov&aacute;r, and oranges.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Ask the housekeeper.</p>
+
+<p><i>Exit Jacob.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>to T&aacute;nya</i>] How is that?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Why, don't you see, my position is such&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB</span> [<i>runs in</i>] There are not enough oranges.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Serve up as many as you've got
+[<i>Exit Jacob</i>]. Now's not the time! Just see what a
+bustle we are in.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> But you know yourself, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, there
+is no end to this bustle; one might wait for ever&mdash;you
+know yourself&mdash;and my affair is for life.&hellip; Dear Theodore
+Iv&aacute;nitch, you have done me a good turn, be a father to me
+now, choose the right moment and tell her, or else she'll
+get angry and won't let me have my passport.<a name="FNanchor_19_19" href="#Footnote_19_19" class="fnanchor">[19]</a></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Where's the hurry?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Why, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, it's all settled now.&hellip;
+And I could go to my godmother's and get ready, and then
+after Easter we'd get married.<a name="FNanchor_20_20" href="#Footnote_20_20" class="fnanchor">[20]</a> Do tell her, dear Theodore
+Iv&aacute;nitch!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Go away&mdash;this is not the place.</p>
+
+<p><i>An elderly Gentleman comes downstairs, puts on overcoat, and
+goes out followed by the Second Footman.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>Exit T&aacute;nya. Enter Jacob.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> Just fancy, Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, it's too bad! She
+wants to discharge me now! She says, &ldquo;You break everything,
+and forget Frisk, and you let the peasants into
+the kitchen against my orders!&rdquo; And you know very
+well that I knew nothing about it. Taty&aacute;na told me,
+&ldquo;Take them into the kitchen&rdquo;; how could I tell whose
+order it was?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_220">220</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Did the mistress speak to you?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> She's just spoken. Do speak up for me, Theodore
+Iv&aacute;nitch! You see, my people in the country are only
+just getting on their feet, and suppose I lose my place,
+when shall I get another? Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, do, please!</p>
+
+<p><i>Anna P&aacute;vlovna comes down with the old Countess, whom she
+is seeing off. The Countess has false teeth and hair. The First
+Footman helps the Countess into her outdoor things.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Oh, most certainly, of course! I am so
+deeply touched.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">COUNTESS.</span> If it were not for my illness, I should come
+oftener to see you.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> You should really consult Peter Petr&oacute;vitch.
+He is rough, but nobody can soothe one as he does.
+He is so clear, so simple.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">COUNTESS.</span> Oh no, I shall keep to the one I am used to.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Pray, take care of yourself.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">COUNTESS.</span> <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Merci, mille fois merci.</i><a name="FNanchor_21_21" href="#Footnote_21_21" class="fnanchor">[21]</a></p>
+
+<p><i>Gregory, dishevelled and excited, jumps out from the servants'
+quarters. Simon appears behind him in the doorway.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> You'd better leave her alone!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> You rascal! I'll teach you how to fight, you
+scamp, you!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> What do you mean? Do you think you
+are in a public-house?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> This coarse peasant makes life impossible for
+me.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>provoked</i>] You've lost your senses.
+Don't you see? [<i>To Countess</i>] <i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Merci, mille fois merci. A
+mardi!</i><a name="FNanchor_22_22" href="#Footnote_22_22" class="fnanchor">[22]</a></p>
+
+<p><i>Exeunt Countess and First Footman.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>to Gregory</i>] What is the meaning of
+this?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_221">221</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Though I do occupy the position of a footman,
+still I won't allow every peasant to hit me; I have my pride too.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Why, what has happened?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Why, this Simon of yours has got so brave,
+sitting with the gentlemen, that he wants to fight!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Why? What for?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Heaven only knows!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>to Simon</i>] What is the meaning of it?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON.</span> Why does he bother her?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> What has happened?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SIMON</span> [<i>smiles</i>] Well, you see, he is always catching hold
+of T&aacute;nya, the lady's-maid, and she won't have it. Well,
+so I just moved him aside a bit, just so, with my hand.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> A nice little bit! He's almost caved my ribs
+in, and has torn my dress-coat, and he says, &ldquo;The same
+power as came over me yesterday comes on me again,&rdquo; and
+he begins to squeeze me.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>to Simon</i>] How dare you fight in my
+house?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> May I explain it to you, ma'am?
+I must tell you Simon is not indifferent to T&aacute;nya, and
+is engaged to her. And Gregory&mdash;one must admit the
+truth&mdash;does not behave properly, nor honestly, to her.
+Well, so I suppose Simon got angry with him.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Not at all! It is all his spite, because I have
+discovered their trickery.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> What trickery?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> Why, at the s&eacute;ance. All those things, last
+night,&mdash;it was not Simon but T&aacute;nya who did them! I saw
+her getting out from under the sofa with my own eyes.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> What is that? From under the sofa?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> I give you my word of honour. And it was
+she who threw the paper on the table. If it had not
+been for her the paper would not have been signed, nor
+the land sold to the peasants.</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_222">222</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> And you saw it yourself?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> With my own eyes. Shall I call her? She'll
+not deny it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Yes, call her.</p>
+
+<p><i>Exit Gregory.</i></p>
+
+<p><i>Noise behind the scenes. The voice of the Doorkeeper,
+&ldquo;No, no, you cannot.&rdquo; Doorkeeper is seen at the front door,
+the three Peasants rush in past him, the Second Peasant first;
+the Third one stumbles, falls on his nose, and catches hold
+of it.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOORKEEPER.</span> You must not go in!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Where's the harm? We are not doing
+anything wrong. We only wish to pay the money!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it; as by laying on the signature
+the affair is come to a conclusion, we only wish to
+make payment with thanks.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Wait a bit with your thanks. It was all
+done by fraud! It is not settled yet. Not sold yet.&hellip;
+Leon&iacute;d.&hellip; Call Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch. [<i>Exit Doorkeeper</i>].</p>
+
+<p><i>Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch enters, but, seeing his wife and the Peasants,
+wishes to retreat.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> No, no, come here, please! I told you
+the land must not be sold on credit, and everybody
+told you so, but you let yourself be deceived like the
+veriest blockhead.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> How? I don't understand who is
+deceiving?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> You ought to be ashamed of yourself!
+You have grey hair, and you let yourself be deceived and
+laughed at like a silly boy. You grudge your son some
+three hundred roubles which his social position demands,
+and let yourself be tricked of thousands&mdash;like a fool!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Now come, Annette, try to be
+calm.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> We are only come about the acceptation
+of the sum, for example&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_223">223</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT</span> [<i>taking out the money</i>] Let us finish the
+matter, for Christ's sake!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Wait, wait!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter T&aacute;nya and Gregory.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>angrily</i>] You were in the small drawing-room
+during the s&eacute;ance last night?</p>
+
+<p><i>T&aacute;nya looks round at Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch,
+and Simon, and sighs.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">GREGORY.</span> It's no use beating about the bush; I saw
+you myself&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Tell me, were you there? I know all
+about it, so you'd better confess! I'll not do anything to
+you. I only want to expose him [<i>pointing to Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch</i>]
+your master.&hellip; Did you throw the paper on the
+table?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> I don't know how to answer. Only one thing,&mdash;let
+me go home.</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Betsy unobserved.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>to Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch</i>] There, you see!
+You are being made a fool of.</p>
+
+<div class="figcenter" style="width: 600px;"><a name="fool"></a>
+<img src="images/p222-insert.png" width="600" height="392" alt="" title="" />
+<div class="caption smcap">FRUITS OF CULTURE. Act IV.</div>
+<div class="caption" style="text-align: justify; margin-left: 2em; margin-right: 2em;"><span class="smcap">Anna P&aacute;vlovna.</span> There, you see! You are being made a fool of.</div>
+</div>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Let me go home, Anna P&aacute;vlovna!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> No, my dear! You may have caused
+us a loss of thousands of roubles. Land has been sold
+that ought not to be sold!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Let me go, Anna P&aacute;vlovna!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> No; you'll have to answer for it! Such
+tricks won't do. We'll have you up before the Justice of
+the Peace!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY</span> [<i>comes forward</i>] Let her go, mamma. Or, if you
+wish to have her tried, you must have me tried too! She
+and I did it together.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Well, of course, if <em>you</em> have a hand in
+anything, what can one expect but the very worst results!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter the Professor.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> How do you do, Anna P&aacute;vlovna? How do
+you do, Miss Betsy? Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch, I have brought
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_224">224</a></span>you a report of the Thirteenth Congress of Spiritualists at
+Chicago. An amazing speech by Schmidt!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Oh, that is interesting!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> I will tell you something much more
+interesting! It turns out that both you and my husband
+were fooled by this girl! Betsy takes it on herself,
+but that is only to annoy me. It was an illiterate peasant
+girl who fooled you, and you believed it all. There were
+no mediumistic phenomena last night; it was she [<i>pointing
+to T&aacute;nya</i>] who did it!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>taking off his overcoat</i>] What do you mean?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> I mean that it was she who, in the
+dark, played on the guitar and beat my husband on the
+head and performed all your idiotic tricks&mdash;and she has
+just confessed!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>smiling</i>] What does that prove?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> It proves that your mediumism is&mdash;tomfoolery;
+that's what it proves!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR.</span> Because this young girl wished to deceive, we
+are to conclude that mediumism is &ldquo;tomfoolery,&rdquo; as you
+are pleased to express it? [<i>Smiles</i>] A curious conclusion!
+Very possibly this young girl may have wished to deceive:
+that often occurs. She may even have done something;
+but then, what she did&mdash;<em>she</em> did. But the manifestations
+of mediumistic energy still remain manifestations
+of <em>mediumistic</em> energy! It is even very probable that
+what this young girl did, evoked (and so to say solicited)
+the manifestation of mediumistic energy,&mdash;giving it a
+definite form.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Another lecture!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>sternly</i>] You say, Anna P&aacute;vlovna, that this
+girl, and perhaps this dear young lady also, did something;
+but the light we all saw, and, in the first case the
+fall, and in the second the rise of temperature, and Grossman's
+excitement and vibration&mdash;were those things also
+done by this girl? And these are facts, Anna P&aacute;vlovna,
+<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_225">225</a></span>facts! No! Anna P&aacute;vlovna, there are things which must
+be investigated and fully understood before they can be
+talked about, things too serious, too serious&nbsp;&hellip;</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> And the child that M&aacute;rya Vas&iacute;levna
+distinctly saw? Why, I saw it too.&hellip; That could not
+have been done by this girl.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> You think yourself wise, but you are&mdash;a
+fool.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Well, I'm going.&hellip; Alex&eacute;y Vlad&iacute;miritch,
+will you come? [<i>Exit into his study</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">PROFESSOR</span> [<i>shrugging his shoulders, follows</i>] Oh, how far,
+how far, we still lag behind Western Europe!</p>
+
+<p><i>Enter Jacob.</i></p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>following Leon&iacute;d Fy&oacute;doritch with her eyes</i>]
+He has been tricked like a fool, and he sees nothing! [<i>To
+Jacob</i>] What do you want?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">JACOB.</span> How many persons am I to lay the table
+for?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> For how many?&hellip; Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch!
+Let him give up the silver plate to you. Be off, at
+once! It is all his fault! This man will bring me to my
+grave. Last night he nearly starved the dog that had
+done him no harm! And, as if that were not enough, he
+lets the infected peasants into the kitchen, and now they
+are here again! It is all his fault! Be off at once! Discharge
+him, discharge him! [<i>To Simon</i>] And you, horrid
+peasant, if you dare to have rows in my house again, I'll
+teach you!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> All right, if he is a horrid peasant there's
+no good keeping him; you'd better discharge him too, and
+there's an end of it.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA</span> [<i>while listening to him looks at Third Peasant</i>]
+Only look! Why, he has a rash on his nose&mdash;a rash! He is
+ill; he is a hotbed of infection!! Did I not give orders,
+yesterday, that they were not to be allowed into the house,
+and here they are again? Drive them out!</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_226">226</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Then are we not to accept their
+money?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Their money? Oh yes, take their
+money; but they must be turned out at once, especially
+this one! He is quite rotten!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> That's not just, lady. God's my witness,
+it's not just! You'd better ask my old woman, let's
+say, whether I am rotten! I'm clear as crystal, let's say.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> He talks!&hellip; Off, off with him! It's
+all to spite me!&hellip; Oh, I can't bear it, I can't!&hellip;
+Send for the doctor! [<i>Runs away, sobbing. Exit also Jacob
+and Gregory</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA</span> [<i>to Betsy</i>] Miss Elizabeth, darling, what am I to
+do now?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Never mind, you go with them and I'll arrange
+it all. [<i>Exit</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> Well, your reverence, how about the reception
+of the sum now?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Let us settle up, and go.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT</span> [<i>fumbling with the packet of bank-notes</i>]
+Had I known, I'd not have come for the world. It's worse
+than a fever!</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH</span> [<i>to Doorkeeper</i>] Show them into my
+room. There's a counting-board there. I'll receive their
+money. Now go.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">DOORKEEPER.</span> Come along.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> And it's T&aacute;nya you have to thank
+for it. But for her you'd not have had the land.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">FIRST PEASANT.</span> That's just it. As she made the proposal,
+so she put it into effect.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THIRD PEASANT.</span> She's made men of us. Else what were
+we? We had so little land, no room to let a hen out,
+let's say, not to mention the cattle. Good-bye, dear!
+When you get to the village, come to us and eat honey.</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">SECOND PEASANT.</span> Let me get home and I'll start brewing
+the beer for the wedding! You will come?</p>
+
+<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_227">227</a></span>
+<span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Yes, I'll come, I'll come! [<i>Shrieks</i>] Simon, this
+is fine, isn't it? [<i>Exeunt Peasants</i>].</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">THEODORE IV&Aacute;NITCH.</span> Well, T&aacute;nya, when you have your
+house I'll come to visit you. Will you welcome me?</p>
+
+<p><span class="speaker">T&Aacute;NYA.</span> Dear Theodore Iv&aacute;nitch, just the same as we
+would our own father! [<i>Embraces and kisses him</i>].</p>
+
+<p class="center curtain"><i>Curtain.</i></p>
+
+<p class="center" style="margin-top: 8em; font-size: 0.85em;">END OF &ldquo;FRUITS OF CULTURE.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<div class="footnotes">
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_1_1" href="#FNanchor_1_1" class="label">[1]</a> Economical balls at which the ladies are bound to appear in dresses
+made of cotton materials.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_2_2" href="#FNanchor_2_2" class="label">[2]</a> The present value of the rouble is rather over two shillings and
+one penny.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_3_3" href="#FNanchor_3_3" class="label">[3]</a> The Gypsy choirs are very popular in Moscow.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_4_4" href="#FNanchor_4_4" class="label">[4]</a> <span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Cease! You are becoming quite unbearable!</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_5_5" href="#FNanchor_5_5" class="label">[5]</a> <span class="speaker">PETR&Iacute;STCHEF.</span> I have C said (<em>ceased</em>), B said, and D said.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_6_6" href="#FNanchor_6_6" class="label">[6]</a> <span class="speaker">BARONESS.</span> But tell me, please, is he paid for this?
+</p><p>
+<span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> I really do not know.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_7_7" href="#FNanchor_7_7" class="label">[7]</a> <span class="speaker">BARONESS.</span> But he is a gentleman?
+</p><p>
+<span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Oh yes!
+</p><p>
+<span class="speaker">BARONESS.</span> It is almost miraculous. Isn't it? How does he
+manage to find things?
+</p><p>
+<span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> I really can't tell you. My husband will
+explain it to you.&hellip; Excuse me.&hellip;</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_8_8" href="#FNanchor_8_8" class="label">[8]</a> Stunning!</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_9_9" href="#FNanchor_9_9" class="label">[9]</a> <span class="speaker">BARONESS.</span> Capital! Does it not cause him any pain?
+</p><p>
+<span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> Not the slightest.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_10_10" href="#FNanchor_10_10" class="label">[10]</a> He uses a Centigrade thermometer.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_11_11" href="#FNanchor_11_11" class="label">[11]</a> <span class="speaker">LEON&Iacute;D FY&Oacute;DORITCH.</span> You bring good luck.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_12_12" href="#FNanchor_12_12" class="label">[12]</a> <span class="speaker">FAT LADY.</span> But he looks quite nice.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_13_13" href="#FNanchor_13_13" class="label">[13]</a> To take a header.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_14_14" href="#FNanchor_14_14" class="label">[14]</a> Do not disappoint us.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_15_15" href="#FNanchor_15_15" class="label">[15]</a> <span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> I have more than enough of your Koko.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_16_16" href="#FNanchor_16_16" class="label">[16]</a> <span class="speaker">YOUNG PRINCESS.</span> &hellip; He is usually so very punctual&nbsp;&hellip;</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_17_17" href="#FNanchor_17_17" class="label">[17]</a> <span class="speaker">BETSY.</span> Cease; mind the servants!</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_18_18" href="#FNanchor_18_18" class="label">[18]</a> And that won't suit me at all, at all! Not at all, at all!</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_19_19" href="#FNanchor_19_19" class="label">[19]</a> Employers have charge of the servants' passports, and in this
+way have a hold on them in case of misconduct.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_20_20" href="#FNanchor_20_20" class="label">[20]</a> See <a href="http://www.gutenberg.org/files/26661/26661-h/26661-h.htm#Footnote_2_2">footnote, p. 28</a>. It is customary for peasants to marry just
+after Easter, but when spring has come and the field work begun,
+no marriages take place among them till autumn.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_21_21" href="#FNanchor_21_21" class="label">[21]</a> <span class="speaker">COUNTESS.</span> Thank you (for your hospitality), a thousand thanks.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_22_22" href="#FNanchor_22_22" class="label">[22]</a> <span class="speaker">ANNA P&Aacute;VLOVNA.</span> Thank you (for coming to see us), a thousand
+thanks. Till next Tuesday!</p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Fruits of Culture, by Leo Tolstoy
+
+*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK FRUITS OF CULTURE ***
+
+***** This file should be named 26663-h.htm or 26663-h.zip *****
+This and all associated files of various formats will be found in:
+        http://www.gutenberg.org/2/6/6/6/26663/
+
+Produced by Bryan Ness, Jana Srna and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions
+will be renamed.
+
+Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no
+one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation
+(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without
+permission and without paying copyright royalties.  Special rules,
+set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to
+copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to
+protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark.  Project
+Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you
+charge for the eBooks, unless you receive specific permission.  If you
+do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the
+rules is very easy.  You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose
+such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and
+research.  They may be modified and printed and given away--you may do
+practically ANYTHING with public domain eBooks.  Redistribution is
+subject to the trademark license, especially commercial
+redistribution.
+
+
+
+*** START: FULL LICENSE ***
+
+THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE
+PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK
+
+To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free
+distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work
+(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project
+Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project
+Gutenberg-tm License (available with this file or online at
+http://gutenberg.org/license).
+
+
+Section 1.  General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg-tm
+electronic works
+
+1.A.  By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm
+electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to
+and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property
+(trademark/copyright) agreement.  If you do not agree to abide by all
+the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy
+all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your possession.
+If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project
+Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the
+terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or
+entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8.
+
+1.B.  "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark.  It may only be
+used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who
+agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement.  There are a few
+things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works
+even without complying with the full terms of this agreement.  See
+paragraph 1.C below.  There are a lot of things you can do with Project
+Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement
+and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm electronic
+works.  See paragraph 1.E below.
+
+1.C.  The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the Foundation"
+or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project
+Gutenberg-tm electronic works.  Nearly all the individual works in the
+collection are in the public domain in the United States.  If an
+individual work is in the public domain in the United States and you are
+located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from
+copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative
+works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg
+are removed.  Of course, we hope that you will support the Project
+Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting free access to electronic works by
+freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm works in compliance with the terms of
+this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with
+the work.  You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by
+keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project
+Gutenberg-tm License when you share it without charge with others.
+
+1.D.  The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern
+what you can do with this work.  Copyright laws in most countries are in
+a constant state of change.  If you are outside the United States, check
+the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement
+before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or
+creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project
+Gutenberg-tm work.  The Foundation makes no representations concerning
+the copyright status of any work in any country outside the United
+States.
+
+1.E.  Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg:
+
+1.E.1.  The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate
+access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear prominently
+whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work on which the
+phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the phrase "Project
+Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed,
+copied or distributed:
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+1.E.2.  If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is derived
+from the public domain (does not contain a notice indicating that it is
+posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied
+and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees
+or charges.  If you are redistributing or providing access to a work
+with the phrase "Project Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the
+work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1
+through 1.E.7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the
+Project Gutenberg-tm trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or
+1.E.9.
+
+1.E.3.  If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted
+with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution
+must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any additional
+terms imposed by the copyright holder.  Additional terms will be linked
+to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works posted with the
+permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work.
+
+1.E.4.  Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm
+License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this
+work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm.
+
+1.E.5.  Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this
+electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without
+prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with
+active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project
+Gutenberg-tm License.
+
+1.E.6.  You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary,
+compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any
+word processing or hypertext form.  However, if you provide access to or
+distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format other than
+"Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official version
+posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site (www.gutenberg.org),
+you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a
+copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon
+request, of the work in its original "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other
+form.  Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg-tm
+License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1.
+
+1.E.7.  Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying,
+performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works
+unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9.
+
+1.E.8.  You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing
+access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works provided
+that
+
+- You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from
+     the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method
+     you already use to calculate your applicable taxes.  The fee is
+     owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he
+     has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the
+     Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation.  Royalty payments
+     must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you
+     prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax
+     returns.  Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and
+     sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the
+     address specified in Section 4, "Information about donations to
+     the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation."
+
+- You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies
+     you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he
+     does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm
+     License.  You must require such a user to return or
+     destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium
+     and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of
+     Project Gutenberg-tm works.
+
+- You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of any
+     money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the
+     electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days
+     of receipt of the work.
+
+- You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free
+     distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works.
+
+1.E.9.  If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg-tm
+electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set
+forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from
+both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and Michael
+Hart, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark.  Contact the
+Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below.
+
+1.F.
+
+1.F.1.  Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable
+effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread
+public domain works in creating the Project Gutenberg-tm
+collection.  Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm electronic
+works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain
+"Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or
+corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual
+property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a
+computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by
+your equipment.
+
+1.F.2.  LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right
+of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project
+Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project
+Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project
+Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all
+liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal
+fees.  YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT
+LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE
+PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH F3.  YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE
+TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE
+LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR
+INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH
+DAMAGE.
+
+1.F.3.  LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a
+defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can
+receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a
+written explanation to the person you received the work from.  If you
+received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with
+your written explanation.  The person or entity that provided you with
+the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a
+refund.  If you received the work electronically, the person or entity
+providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to
+receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund.  If the second copy
+is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further
+opportunities to fix the problem.
+
+1.F.4.  Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth
+in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS' WITH NO OTHER
+WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO
+WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTIBILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE.
+
+1.F.5.  Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied
+warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of damages.
+If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement violates the
+law of the state applicable to this agreement, the agreement shall be
+interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or limitation permitted by
+the applicable state law.  The invalidity or unenforceability of any
+provision of this agreement shall not void the remaining provisions.
+
+1.F.6.  INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the
+trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone
+providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in accordance
+with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the production,
+promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works,
+harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, including legal fees,
+that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following which you do
+or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this or any Project Gutenberg-tm
+work, (b) alteration, modification, or additions or deletions to any
+Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any Defect you cause.
+
+
+Section  2.  Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm
+
+Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of
+electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of computers
+including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers.  It exists
+because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations from
+people in all walks of life.
+
+Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the
+assistance they need, is critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's
+goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will
+remain freely available for generations to come.  In 2001, the Project
+Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure
+and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future generations.
+To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation
+and how your efforts and donations can help, see Sections 3 and 4
+and the Foundation web page at http://www.pglaf.org.
+
+
+Section 3.  Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive
+Foundation
+
+The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit
+501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the
+state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal
+Revenue Service.  The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification
+number is 64-6221541.  Its 501(c)(3) letter is posted at
+http://pglaf.org/fundraising.  Contributions to the Project Gutenberg
+Literary Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent
+permitted by U.S. federal laws and your state's laws.
+
+The Foundation's principal office is located at 4557 Melan Dr. S.
+Fairbanks, AK, 99712., but its volunteers and employees are scattered
+throughout numerous locations.  Its business office is located at
+809 North 1500 West, Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887, email
+business@pglaf.org.  Email contact links and up to date contact
+information can be found at the Foundation's web site and official
+page at http://pglaf.org
+
+For additional contact information:
+     Dr. Gregory B. Newby
+     Chief Executive and Director
+     gbnewby@pglaf.org
+
+
+Section 4.  Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg
+Literary Archive Foundation
+
+Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide
+spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of
+increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be
+freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest
+array of equipment including outdated equipment.  Many small donations
+($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt
+status with the IRS.
+
+The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating
+charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United
+States.  Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a
+considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up
+with these requirements.  We do not solicit donations in locations
+where we have not received written confirmation of compliance.  To
+SEND DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any
+particular state visit http://pglaf.org
+
+While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we
+have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition
+against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who
+approach us with offers to donate.
+
+International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make
+any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from
+outside the United States.  U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff.
+
+Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation
+methods and addresses.  Donations are accepted in a number of other
+ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations.
+To donate, please visit: http://pglaf.org/donate
+
+
+Section 5.  General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic
+works.
+
+Professor Michael S. Hart is the originator of the Project Gutenberg-tm
+concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared
+with anyone.  For thirty years, he produced and distributed Project
+Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support.
+
+
+Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed
+editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the U.S.
+unless a copyright notice is included.  Thus, we do not necessarily
+keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition.
+
+
+Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search facility:
+
+     http://www.gutenberg.org
+
+This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm,
+including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary
+Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to
+subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks.
+
+
+</pre>
+
+</body>
+</html>
diff --git a/26663-h/images/p174-insert.png b/26663-h/images/p174-insert.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..1213c06
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-h/images/p174-insert.png
diff --git a/26663-h/images/p222-insert.png b/26663-h/images/p222-insert.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..0b21c2d
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-h/images/p222-insert.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p121.png b/26663-page-images/p121.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..45f9c95
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p121.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p122.png b/26663-page-images/p122.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..942250a
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p122.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p123.png b/26663-page-images/p123.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..b011c22
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p123.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p124.png b/26663-page-images/p124.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..8ac28a4
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p124.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p125.png b/26663-page-images/p125.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..f408f18
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p125.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p126.png b/26663-page-images/p126.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..5752bbd
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p126.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p127.png b/26663-page-images/p127.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..f3b94e1
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p127.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p128.png b/26663-page-images/p128.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..c541c8c
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p128.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p129.png b/26663-page-images/p129.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..58bb5b1
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p129.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p130.png b/26663-page-images/p130.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..67b6d8d
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p130.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p131.png b/26663-page-images/p131.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..af05aa3
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p131.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p132.png b/26663-page-images/p132.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..be82385
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p132.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p133.png b/26663-page-images/p133.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..ffa8121
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p133.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p134.png b/26663-page-images/p134.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..9135c99
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p134.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p135.png b/26663-page-images/p135.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..cdeea1f
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p135.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p136.png b/26663-page-images/p136.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..c49a502
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p136.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p137.png b/26663-page-images/p137.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..ee15249
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p137.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p138.png b/26663-page-images/p138.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..cf965be
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p138.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p139.png b/26663-page-images/p139.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..1ada83e
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p139.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p140.png b/26663-page-images/p140.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..0a1b2e7
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p140.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p141.png b/26663-page-images/p141.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..a8417f6
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p141.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p142.png b/26663-page-images/p142.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..6011f21
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p142.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p143.png b/26663-page-images/p143.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..4a76cf9
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p143.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p144.png b/26663-page-images/p144.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..3e1dfcc
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p144.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p145.png b/26663-page-images/p145.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..1e9adb9
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p145.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p146.png b/26663-page-images/p146.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..df73ee5
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p146.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p147.png b/26663-page-images/p147.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..2915042
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p147.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p148.png b/26663-page-images/p148.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..1ed6f78
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p148.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p149.png b/26663-page-images/p149.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..5174c39
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p149.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p150.png b/26663-page-images/p150.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..0969f9b
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p150.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p151.png b/26663-page-images/p151.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..a5795c0
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p151.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p152.png b/26663-page-images/p152.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..1d82227
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p152.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p153.png b/26663-page-images/p153.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..0af6b31
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p153.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p154.png b/26663-page-images/p154.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..7a6ab87
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p154.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p155.png b/26663-page-images/p155.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..a528143
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p155.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p156.png b/26663-page-images/p156.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..b163e3a
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p156.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p157.png b/26663-page-images/p157.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..73223de
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p157.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p158.png b/26663-page-images/p158.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..9fe73ab
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p158.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p159.png b/26663-page-images/p159.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..ad6b4bf
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p159.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p160.png b/26663-page-images/p160.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..176b3ee
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p160.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p161.png b/26663-page-images/p161.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..a955eba
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p161.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p162.png b/26663-page-images/p162.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..0462502
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p162.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p163.png b/26663-page-images/p163.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..1142ed5
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p163.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p164.png b/26663-page-images/p164.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..6742592
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p164.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p165.png b/26663-page-images/p165.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..bdf805e
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p165.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p166.png b/26663-page-images/p166.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..c4bd573
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p166.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p167.png b/26663-page-images/p167.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..233c4ec
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p167.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p168.png b/26663-page-images/p168.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..aec0189
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p168.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p169.png b/26663-page-images/p169.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..83fdf35
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p169.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p170.png b/26663-page-images/p170.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..5b4abe5
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p170.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p171.png b/26663-page-images/p171.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..b3ea0c1
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p171.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p172.png b/26663-page-images/p172.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..7d92a91
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p172.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p173.png b/26663-page-images/p173.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..e7f83dc
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p173.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p174-insert.png b/26663-page-images/p174-insert.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..28e3a5a
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p174-insert.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p174.png b/26663-page-images/p174.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..0eaf848
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p174.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p175.png b/26663-page-images/p175.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..3f16703
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p175.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p176.png b/26663-page-images/p176.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..499a9af
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p176.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p177.png b/26663-page-images/p177.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..5113982
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p177.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p178.png b/26663-page-images/p178.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..e5f9939
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p178.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p179.png b/26663-page-images/p179.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..e9ba865
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p179.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p180.png b/26663-page-images/p180.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..3374706
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p180.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p181.png b/26663-page-images/p181.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..ff0e1fd
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p181.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p182.png b/26663-page-images/p182.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..1f3f3bc
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p182.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p183.png b/26663-page-images/p183.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..6fe889b
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p183.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p184.png b/26663-page-images/p184.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..6cf1e53
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p184.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p185.png b/26663-page-images/p185.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..c75cb74
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p185.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p186.png b/26663-page-images/p186.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..21c1011
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p186.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p187.png b/26663-page-images/p187.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..3a7569d
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p187.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p188.png b/26663-page-images/p188.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..f0f65b9
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p188.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p189.png b/26663-page-images/p189.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..4b9e661
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p189.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p190.png b/26663-page-images/p190.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..06674fc
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p190.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p191.png b/26663-page-images/p191.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..988f6b4
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p191.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p192.png b/26663-page-images/p192.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..58e5567
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p192.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p193.png b/26663-page-images/p193.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..02ba61b
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p193.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p194.png b/26663-page-images/p194.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..79b03c1
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p194.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p195.png b/26663-page-images/p195.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..229f074
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p195.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p196.png b/26663-page-images/p196.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..033011f
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p196.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p197.png b/26663-page-images/p197.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..87651db
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p197.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p198.png b/26663-page-images/p198.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..127a6d8
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p198.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p199.png b/26663-page-images/p199.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..9688ea9
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p199.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p200.png b/26663-page-images/p200.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..2ce0d21
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p200.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p201.png b/26663-page-images/p201.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..3f82ae2
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p201.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p202.png b/26663-page-images/p202.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..8223345
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p202.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p203.png b/26663-page-images/p203.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..dd876f2
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p203.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p204.png b/26663-page-images/p204.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..f1da2b4
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p204.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p205.png b/26663-page-images/p205.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..059322c
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p205.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p206.png b/26663-page-images/p206.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..8a034f1
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p206.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p207.png b/26663-page-images/p207.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..de3b6fa
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p207.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p208.png b/26663-page-images/p208.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..50d3ed3
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p208.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p209.png b/26663-page-images/p209.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..7e92b5a
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p209.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p210.png b/26663-page-images/p210.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..e179383
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p210.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p211.png b/26663-page-images/p211.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..baffc86
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p211.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p212.png b/26663-page-images/p212.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..66bf9d2
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p212.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p213.png b/26663-page-images/p213.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..34c1524
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p213.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p214.png b/26663-page-images/p214.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..c1a4795
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p214.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p215.png b/26663-page-images/p215.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..2a358ae
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p215.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p216.png b/26663-page-images/p216.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..27bd60a
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p216.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p217.png b/26663-page-images/p217.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..f9591a2
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p217.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p218.png b/26663-page-images/p218.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..cf47d09
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p218.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p219.png b/26663-page-images/p219.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..5916dfc
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p219.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p220.png b/26663-page-images/p220.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..4a868e7
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p220.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p221.png b/26663-page-images/p221.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..2f97f15
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p221.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p222-insert.png b/26663-page-images/p222-insert.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..a4ff96d
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p222-insert.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p222.png b/26663-page-images/p222.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..d9c2cf1
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p222.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p223.png b/26663-page-images/p223.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..09e409f
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p223.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p224.png b/26663-page-images/p224.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..42d8380
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p224.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p225.png b/26663-page-images/p225.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..054aca4
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p225.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p226.png b/26663-page-images/p226.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..2b4ea40
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p226.png
diff --git a/26663-page-images/p227.png b/26663-page-images/p227.png
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..9b10ed4
--- /dev/null
+++ b/26663-page-images/p227.png
diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..6312041
--- /dev/null
+++ b/LICENSE.txt
@@ -0,0 +1,11 @@
+This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements,
+metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be
+in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES.
+
+Procedures for determining public domain status are described in
+the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org.
+
+No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in
+jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize
+this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright
+status under the laws that apply to them.
diff --git a/README.md b/README.md
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..f3fe9be
--- /dev/null
+++ b/README.md
@@ -0,0 +1,2 @@
+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #26663 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/26663)