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| author | Roger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org> | 2025-10-15 02:34:06 -0700 |
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| committer | Roger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org> | 2025-10-15 02:34:06 -0700 |
| commit | f2b7dab007d170757012d41b78fa843c9132c356 (patch) | |
| tree | 3ae993cde6181d63cca55c73530671b88cd05f07 | |
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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/27182-h.zip b/27182-h.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..dd33855 --- /dev/null +++ b/27182-h.zip diff --git a/27182-h/27182-h.htm b/27182-h/27182-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..42b65aa --- /dev/null +++ b/27182-h/27182-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,1191 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" + "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> + +<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"> + <head> + <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=iso-8859-1" /> + <title> + The Project Gutenberg eBook of More Peers, by Hilaire Belloc. + </title> + <style type="text/css"> +/*<![CDATA[ XML blockout */ +<!-- + p { margin-top: 1.25em; + text-align: justify; + margin-bottom: 1.25em; + } + h1,h2 { + text-align: center; + clear: both; font-weight: normal; + } + hr { width: 65%; + margin-top: 2em; + margin-bottom: 2em; + margin-left: auto; + margin-right: auto; + clear: both; + } + hr.short {width: 15%} + table {margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;} + + body{margin-left: 15%; + margin-right: 15%; + } + + .center {text-align: center;} + .smcap {font-variant: small-caps;} + + .caption {font-weight: normal;} + + .figcenter {margin: auto; text-align: center;} + + .footnote {margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%; font-size: 0.9em;} + .footnote .label {position: absolute; right: 64%; text-align: right;} + .fnanchor {font-size: .8em; text-decoration: none;} + + .poem {margin-left: 30%; margin-right: 30%; text-align: left;} + + // --> + /* XML end ]]>*/ + </style> + </head> +<body> + + +<pre> + +The Project Gutenberg EBook of More Peers Verses, by Hilaire Belloc + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: More Peers Verses + +Author: Hilaire Belloc + +Illustrator: Lord Ian Basil Gawaine Temple, L Blackwood + +Release Date: November 7, 2008 [EBook #27182] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MORE PEERS VERSES *** + + + + +Produced by Chris Curnow, Joseph Cooper, Greg Bergquist, +some images courtesy of The Internet Archive and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net + + + + + + +</pre> + + + + + +<h1>MORE PEERS</h1> + +<p class="center">Verses by H. BELLOC<br /> +Pictures by B. T. B.<br /><br /></p> + + +<p class="center">LONDON: DUCKWORTH & CO.</p> + + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 600px;"> +<img src="images/image1.jpg" width="600" height="752" alt="" title="" /> +</div> +<hr /> + +<p class="center"><br /><br /><br /><br /><small>Printed in Great Britain at<br /> +<i>The Mayflower Press, Plymouth</i>. William Brendon & Son, Ltd.<br /> +</small></p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2>CONTENTS</h2> + + + +<div class='center'> +<table border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" summary="Contents"> +<tr><td align='right' colspan='3'><small>PAGE</small></td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>I.</td> <td align='left'>Edward, first <span class="smcap"><a href="#Lord_Roehampton">Earl of Roehampton</a></span> in the County of Surrey, deceased</td><td align='right'>5</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>II.</td> <td align='left'>Archibald, fifteenth Baron <span class="smcap"><a href="#Lord_Calvin">Calvin</a></span> of Peebles in North Britain</td><td align='right'>11</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>III.</td> <td align='left'>Henry de la Tour Albert St. John Chase, commonly known as <span class="smcap"><a href="#Lord_Henry_Chase">Lord Henry Chase</a></span></td><td align='right'>12</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>IV.</td> <td align='left'>Thomas, second Baron <span class="smcap"><a href="#Lord_Heygate">Heygate</a></span> of Bayswater in the County of London</td><td align='right'>15</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>V.</td> <td align='left'>Percy, first <span class="smcap"><a href="#Lord_Epsom">Earl of Epsom</a></span>, in the County of Surrey</td><td align='right'>16</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>VI.</td> <td align='left'>Arthur Weekes, commonly known as <span class="smcap"><a href="#Lord_Finchley">Lord Finchley</a></span>, Eldest Son and Heir of Charles, first Baron Hendon</td><td align='right'>22</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>VII.</td> <td align='left'>Ali-Baba, first (and last) Baron <span class="smcap"><a href="#Lord_Ali-Baba">Ali-Baba</a></span> of Salonika</td><td align='right'>24</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>VIII.</td> <td align='left'>George Punter, commonly known as <span class="smcap"><a href="#Lord_Hippo">Lord Hippo</a></span>, Eldest Son and Heir of Peter, sixth Earl of Potamus</td><td align='right'>27</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>IX.</td> <td align='left'>Baron <span class="smcap"><a href="#Lord_Uncle_Tom">Uncle Tom</a></span> of Maarfontein in the Britains Over Seas</td><td align='right'>36</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>X.</td> <td align='left'>William, eighth <span class="smcap"><a href="#Lord_Lucky">Earl Lucky</a></span>, subsequently fifth Duke of Bradford</td><td align='right'>39</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>XI.</td> <td align='left'>Christopher, sixth Baron <span class="smcap"><a href="#Lord_Canton">Canton</a></span></td><td align='right'>45</td></tr> +<tr><td align='right'>XII.</td> <td align='left'>Alcibiades, third Baron <span class="smcap"><a href="#Lord_Abbott">Abbott</a></span> of Brackley in Southamptonshire</td><td align='right'>47</td></tr> +</table></div> + + +<div class="poem"> +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Lord_Roehampton" id="Lord_Roehampton"></a>Lord Roehampton</h2> + + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 500px;"> +<img src="images/image2.jpg" width="500" height="330" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +During a late election Lord<br /> +Roehampton strained a vocal chord<br /> +From shouting, very loud and high,<br /> +To lots and lots of people why<br /> +The Budget in his own opin-<br /> +-Ion should not be allowed to win.<br /> +</p> + +<p> +He<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 500px;"> +<img src="images/image3.jpg" width="500" height="382" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">sought a Specialist, who said:</span><br /> +"You have a swelling in the head:<br /> +Your Larynx is a thought relaxed<br /> +And you are greatly over-taxed."<br /> +</p> + +<p> +"I am indeed! On every side!"<br /> +The Earl (for such he was) replied<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image4.jpg" width="400" height="441" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +In hoarse excitement.... "Oh! My Lord,<br /> +You jeopardize your vocal chord!"<br /> +Broke in the worthy Specialist.<br /> +"Come! Here's the treatment! I insist!<br /> +To Bed! to Bed! And do not speak<br /> +A single word till Wednesday week,<br /> +When I will come and set you free<br /> +(If you are cured) and take my fee."<br /> +</p> + +<p> +On Wednesday week the Doctor hires<br /> +A Brand-new Car with Brand-new Tyres<br /> +And Brand-new Chauffeur all complete<br /> +For visiting South Audley Street.<br /> +</p> + +<hr class="short" /> + +<p> +But what is this? No Union Jack<br /> +Floats on the Stables at the back!<br /> +No Toffs escorting Ladies fair<br /> +Perambulate the Gay Parterre.<br /> +A 'Scutcheon hanging lozenge-wise<br /> +And draped in crape appals his eyes<br /> +Upon the mansion's ample door,<br /> +To which he wades through<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image5.jpg" width="400" height="339" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 10.5em;">heaps of Straw,<a name="FNanchor_A_1" id="FNanchor_A_1"></a><a href="#Footnote_A_1" class="fnanchor">[A]</a></span><br /> +And which a Butler<br /> +</p> + +<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_A_1" id="Footnote_A_1"></a><a href="#FNanchor_A_1"><span class="label">[A]</span></a> This is the first and only time +That I have used this sort of Rhyme.</p></div> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image6.jpg" width="400" height="435" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 13.5em;">drowned in tears,</span><br /> +On opening but confirms his fears:<br /> +"Oh! Sir!—Prepare to hear the worst!...<br /> +Last night my kind old master burst.<br /> +And what is more, I doubt if he<br /> +Has left enough to pay your fee.<br /> +The Budget——"<br /> +</p> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 11em;">With a dreadful oath,</span><br /> +The Specialist,<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 500px;"> +<img src="images/image7.jpg" width="500" height="336" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 11em;">denouncing both</span><br /> +The Budget <i>and</i> the House of Lords,<br /> +Buzzed angrily Bayswaterwards.<br /> +</p> + +<hr class="short" /> + +<p> +And ever since, as I am told,<br /> +Gets it beforehand; and in gold.<br /> +</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Lord_Calvin" id="Lord_Calvin"></a>Lord Calvin</h2> + + +<p> +Lord Calvin thought the Bishops should not sit<br /> +As Peers of Parliament.<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image8.jpg" width="400" height="389" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 17em;">And <i>argued</i> it!</span><br /> +In spite of which, for years, and years, and years,<br /> +They went on sitting with their fellow-peers.<br /> +</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Lord_Henry_Chase" id="Lord_Henry_Chase"></a>Lord Henry Chase</h2> + + +<p> +What happened to Lord Henry Chase?<br /> +He got into a<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 300px;"> +<img src="images/image9.jpg" width="300" height="286" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 12em;">Libel Case!</span><br /> +<i>The Daily Howl</i> had said that he—<br /> +But could not prove it perfectly<br /> +To Judge or Jury's satisfaction:<br /> +His Lordship, therefore,<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 500px;"> +<img src="images/image10.jpg" width="500" height="330" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 13em;">won the action.</span><br /> +But, as the damages were small,<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 500px;"> +<img src="images/image11.jpg" width="500" height="304" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +He gave them to a Hospital.<br /> +</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Lord_Heygate" id="Lord_Heygate"></a>Lord Heygate</h2> + + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image12.jpg" width="400" height="328" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span class="smcap">Lord Heygate</span> had a troubled face,<br /> +His furniture was commonplace—<br /> +The sort of Peer who well might pass<br /> +For someone of the middle class.<br /> +I do not think you want to hear<br /> +About this unimportant Peer,<br /> +So let us leave him to discourse<br /> +About <span class="smcap">Lord Epsom</span> and his horse.<br /> +</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Lord_Epsom" id="Lord_Epsom"></a>Lord Epsom</h2> + + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image13.jpg" width="400" height="384" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +A Horse, Lord Epsom did bestride<br /> +With mastery and quiet pride.<br /> +He dug his spurs into its hide.<br /> +</p> + +<p> +The Horse,<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image14.jpg" width="400" height="384" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 9em;">discerning it was pricked,</span><br /> +Incontinently<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image15.jpg" width="400" height="384" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 10.5em;">bucked and kicked,</span><br /> +A thing that no one could predict!<br /> +<br /> +Lord Epsom clearly understood<br /> +The High-bred creature's nervous mood,<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image16.jpg" width="400" height="462" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +As only such a horseman could.<br /> +Dismounting,<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image17.jpg" width="400" height="304" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"><br /><br /><br /> +<img src="images/image18.jpg" width="400" height="254" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 8.5em;">he was heard to say</span><br /> +That it was kinder to delay<br /> +His pleasure to a future day<br /> +</p> + +<hr class="short" /> + +<p> +He had the Hunter led away. +</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Lord_Finchley" id="Lord_Finchley"></a>Lord Finchley</h2> + + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image19.jpg" width="400" height="396" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +Lord Finchley tried to mend the Electric Light<br /> +Himself.<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image20.jpg" width="400" height="375" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It struck him dead: And serve him right!</span><br /> +It is the business of the wealthy man<br /> +To give employment to the artisan.<br /> +</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Lord_Ali-Baba" id="Lord_Ali-Baba"></a>Lord Ali-Baba</h2> + + +<p> +Lord Ali-Baba was a Turk<br /> +Who hated every kind of work,<br /> +And would repose for hours at ease<br /> +With<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image21.jpg" width="400" height="328" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 4em;">Houris seated on his knees.</span><br /> +A happy life!—Until, one day<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image22.jpg" width="400" height="328" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +Mossoo Alphonse Effendi Bey<br /> +(A Younger Turk: the very cream<br /> +And essence of the New Regime)<br /> +Dispelled this Oriental dream<br /> +By granting him a place at Court,<br /> +High Coffee-grinder to the Porte,<br /> +Unpaid:—<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image23.jpg" width="400" height="302" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">In which exalted Post</span><br /> +His Lordship yielded up the ghost.<br /> +</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Lord_Hippo" id="Lord_Hippo"></a>Lord Hippo</h2> + + +<p> +Lord Hippo suffered fearful loss<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image24.jpg" width="400" height="411" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +By putting money on a horse<br /> +Which he believed, if it were pressed,<br /> +Would run far faster than the rest:<br /> +For<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 2em;">someone who was in the know</span><br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image25.jpg" width="400" height="410" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +Had confidently told him so.<br /> +</p> + +<p> +But<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image26.jpg" width="400" height="254" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 2em;">on the morning of the race</span><br /> +It only took<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image27.jpg" width="400" height="333" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 8em;">the <i>seventh</i> place!</span><br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image28.jpg" width="400" height="461" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +Picture the Viscount's great surprise!<br /> +He scarcely could believe his eyes!<br /> +He sought the Individual who<br /> +Had laid him odds at 9 to 2,<br /> +Suggesting as a useful tip<br /> +That they should enter Partnership<br /> +And put to joint account the debt<br /> +Arising from his foolish bet.<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image29.jpg" width="400" height="301" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +But when the Bookie—oh! my word,<br /> +I only wish you could have heard<br /> +The way he roared he did not think,<br /> +And hoped that they might strike him pink!<br /> +Lord Hippo simply turned and ran<br /> +From this infuriated man.<br /> +Despairing, maddened and distraught<br /> +He utterly collapsed and sought<br /> +His sire,<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image30.jpg" width="400" height="282" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 5em;">the Earl of Potamus,</span><br /> +And brokenly addressed him thus:<br /> +"Dread Sire—to-day—at Ascot—I ..."<br /> +His genial parent made reply:<br /> +Come! Come! Come! Come! Don't look so glum!<br /> +Trust your Papa and name the sum....<br /> +</p> + +<p> +<span class="smcap">What?</span><br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image31.jpg" width="400" height="260" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 2em;">... <i>Fifteen hundred thousand?</i>... Hum!</span><br /> +However ... stiffen up, you wreck;<br /> +Boys will be boys—so here's the cheque!<br /> +Lord Hippo, feeling deeply—well,<br /> +More grateful than he cared to tell—<br /> +Punted the lot on Little Nell:—<br /> +And got a telegram at dinner<br /> +To say<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image32.jpg" width="400" height="271" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +that he had backed the Winner!<br /> +</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Lord_Uncle_Tom" id="Lord_Uncle_Tom"></a>Lord Uncle Tom</h2> + + +<p> +Lord Uncle Tom was different from<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">What other nobles are.</span><br /> +For they are yellow or pink, I think,<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But he was black as tar.</span><br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image33.jpg" width="400" height="295" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +He had his Father's debonair<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And rather easy pride:</span><br /> +But his complexion and his hair<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 300px;"> +<img src="images/image34.jpg" width="300" height="475" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +Were from the mother's side.<br /> +</p> + +<p> +He often mingled in debate<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And latterly displayed</span><br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image35.jpg" width="400" height="300" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +Experience of peculiar weight<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Upon the Cocoa-trade.</span><br /> +<br /> +But now He speaks no more. The <span class="smcap">Bill</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Which he could not abide,</span><br /> +It preyed upon his mind until<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He sickened, paled, and died.</span><br /> +</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Lord_Lucky" id="Lord_Lucky"></a>Lord Lucky</h2> + + +<p> +Lord Lucky, by a curious fluke,<br /> +Became a most important duke.<br /> +From living in a vile Hotel<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image36.jpg" width="400" height="449" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +A long way east of Camberwell<br /> +</p> + +<p> +He rose, in less than half an hour,<br /> +To riches, dignity and power.<br /> +It happened in the following way:—<br /> +The Real Duke went out one day<br /> +To shoot with several people, one<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image37.jpg" width="400" height="286" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +Of whom had never used a gun.<br /> +This gentleman (a Mr. Meyer<br /> +Of Rabley Abbey, Rutlandshire),<br /> +As he was scrambling through the brake,<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image38.jpg" width="400" height="256" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +Discharged his weapon by mistake,<br /> +And plugged about an ounce of lead<br /> +Piff-bang into his Grace's Head——<br /> +Who naturally fell down dead.<br /> +</p> + +<p> +His heir, Lord Ugly, roared, "You Brute!<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image39.jpg" width="400" height="267" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +Take that to teach you how to shoot!"<br /> +Whereat he volleyed, left and right;<br /> +But being somewhat short of sight,<br /> +His right-hand Barrel only got<br /> +The second heir, Lord Poddleplot;<br /> +The while the left-hand charge (or choke)<br /> +Accounted for another bloke,<br /> +Who stood with an astounded air<br /> +Bewildered by the whole affair<br /> +—And was the third remaining heir.<br /> +</p> + +<p> +After the<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 300px;"> +<img src="images/image40.jpg" width="300" height="356" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Execution (which</span><br /> +Is something rare among the Rich)<br /> +Lord Lucky, while of course he needed<br /> +Some<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image41.jpg" width="400" height="305" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 3em;">help to prove their claim,</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 16.5em;">succeeded.</span><br /> +—But after his succession, though<br /> +All this was over years ago,<br /> +He only once indulged the whim<br /> +Of asking Meyer to lunch with him.<br /> +</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Lord_Canton" id="Lord_Canton"></a>Lord Canton</h2> + + +<p> +The reason that<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image42.jpg" width="400" height="472" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 8.5em;">the Present Lord Canton</span><br /> +Succeeded lately to his Brother John<br /> +Was that his Brother John, the elder son,<br /> +Died rather suddenly at forty-one.<br /> +</p> + +<p> +The insolence of an Italian guide<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image43.jpg" width="400" height="299" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +Appears to be the reason that he died.<br /> +</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="Lord_Abbott" id="Lord_Abbott"></a>Lord Abbott</h2> + + +<p> +Lord Abbott's coronet was far too small,<br /> +So small, that as he sauntered down White Hall<br /> +Even the youthful Proletariat<br /> +(Who probably mistook it for a Hat)<br /> +Remarked on its exiguous extent.<br /> +</p> + +<div class="figcenter" style="width: 400px;"> +<img src="images/image44.jpg" width="400" height="343" alt="" title="" /> +</div> + +<p> +Here is a picture of the incident.<br /> +</p> +</div> + + + + + + + +<pre> + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of More Peers Verses, by Hilaire Belloc + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MORE PEERS VERSES *** + +***** This file should be named 27182-h.htm or 27182-h.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/2/7/1/8/27182/ + +Produced by Chris Curnow, Joseph Cooper, Greg Bergquist, +some images courtesy of The Internet Archive and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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Peers Verses, by Hilaire Belloc + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: More Peers Verses + +Author: Hilaire Belloc + +Illustrator: Lord Ian Basil Gawaine Temple, L Blackwood + +Release Date: November 7, 2008 [EBook #27182] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MORE PEERS VERSES *** + + + + +Produced by Chris Curnow, Joseph Cooper, Greg Bergquist, +some images courtesy of The Internet Archive and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net + + + + + + + + + + MORE PEERS + + Verses by H. BELLOC + Pictures by B. T. B. + + [Illustration] + + LONDON: DUCKWORTH & CO. + + + + + Printed in Great Britain at + _The Mayflower Press, Plymouth_. William Brendon & Son, Ltd. + + + + + CONTENTS + + + PAGE + + I. Edward, first EARL OF ROEHAMPTON in the County of + Surrey, deceased 5 + + II. Archibald, fifteenth Baron CALVIN of Peebles in North + Britain 11 + + III. Henry de la Tour Albert St. John Chase, commonly + known as LORD HENRY CHASE 12 + + IV. Thomas, second Baron HEYGATE of Bayswater in the + County of London 15 + + V. Percy, first EARL OF EPSOM, in the County of Surrey 16 + + VI. Arthur Weekes, commonly known as LORD FINCHLEY, + Eldest Son and Heir of Charles, first Baron + Hendon 22 + + VII. Ali-Baba, first (and last) Baron ALI-BABA of Salonika 24 + + VIII. George Punter, commonly known as LORD HIPPO, + Eldest Son and Heir of Peter, sixth Earl of + Potamus 27 + + IX. Baron UNCLE TOM of Maarfontein in the Britains + Over Seas 36 + + X. William, eighth EARL LUCKY, subsequently fifth Duke + of Bradford 39 + + XI. Christopher, sixth Baron CANTON 45 + + XII. Alcibiades, third Baron ABBOTT of Brackley in Southamptonshire 47 + + + + +Lord Roehampton + + +[Illustration] + +During a late election Lord +Roehampton strained a vocal chord +From shouting, very loud and high, +To lots and lots of people why +The Budget in his own opin- +-Ion should not be allowed to win. + +He + +[Illustration] + + sought a Specialist, who said: +"You have a swelling in the head: +Your Larynx is a thought relaxed +And you are greatly over-taxed." + +"I am indeed! On every side!" +The Earl (for such he was) replied + +[Illustration] + +In hoarse excitement.... "Oh! My Lord, +You jeopardize your vocal chord!" +Broke in the worthy Specialist. +"Come! Here's the treatment! I insist! +To Bed! to Bed! And do not speak +A single word till Wednesday week, +When I will come and set you free +(If you are cured) and take my fee." + +On Wednesday week the Doctor hires +A Brand-new Car with Brand-new Tyres +And Brand-new Chauffeur all complete +For visiting South Audley Street. + + * * * * * + +But what is this? No Union Jack +Floats on the Stables at the back! +No Toffs escorting Ladies fair +Perambulate the Gay Parterre. +A 'Scutcheon hanging lozenge-wise +And draped in crape appals his eyes +Upon the mansion's ample door, +To which he wades through + +[Illustration] + + heaps of Straw,[A] +And which a Butler + +[A] This is the first and only time +That I have used this sort of Rhyme. + +[Illustration] + + drowned in tears, +On opening but confirms his fears: +"Oh! Sir!--Prepare to hear the worst!... +Last night my kind old master burst. +And what is more, I doubt if he +Has left enough to pay your fee. +The Budget----" + + With a dreadful oath, +The Specialist, + +[Illustration] + + denouncing both +The Budget _and_ the House of Lords, +Buzzed angrily Bayswaterwards. + + * * * * * + +And ever since, as I am told, +Gets it beforehand; and in gold. + + + + +Lord Calvin + + +Lord Calvin thought the Bishops should not sit +As Peers of Parliament. + +[Illustration] + + And _argued_ it! +In spite of which, for years, and years, and years, +They went on sitting with their fellow-peers. + + + + +Lord Henry Chase + + +What happened to Lord Henry Chase? +He got into a + +[Illustration] + + Libel Case! +_The Daily Howl_ had said that he-- +But could not prove it perfectly +To Judge or Jury's satisfaction: +His Lordship, therefore, + +[Illustration] + + won the action. +But, as the damages were small, + +[Illustration] + +He gave them to a Hospital. + + + + +Lord Heygate + + +[Illustration] + +LORD HEYGATE had a troubled face, +His furniture was commonplace-- +The sort of Peer who well might pass +For someone of the middle class. +I do not think you want to hear +About this unimportant Peer, +So let us leave him to discourse +About LORD EPSOM and his horse. + + + + +Lord Epsom + + +[Illustration] + +A Horse, Lord Epsom did bestride +With mastery and quiet pride. +He dug his spurs into its hide. + +The Horse, + +[Illustration] + + discerning it was pricked, +Incontinently + +[Illustration] + + bucked and kicked, +A thing that no one could predict! + +Lord Epsom clearly understood +The High-bred creature's nervous mood, + +[Illustration] + +As only such a horseman could. +Dismounting, + +[Illustration] + +[Illustration] + + he was heard to say +That it was kinder to delay +His pleasure to a future day + + * * * * * + +He had the Hunter led away. + + + + +Lord Finchley + + +[Illustration] + +Lord Finchley tried to mend the Electric Light +Himself. + +[Illustration] + + It struck him dead: And serve him right! +It is the business of the wealthy man +To give employment to the artisan. + + + + +Lord Ali-Baba + + +Lord Ali-Baba was a Turk +Who hated every kind of work, +And would repose for hours at ease +With + +[Illustration] + + Houris seated on his knees. +A happy life!--Until, one day + +[Illustration] + +Mossoo Alphonse Effendi Bey +(A Younger Turk: the very cream +And essence of the New Regime) +Dispelled this Oriental dream +By granting him a place at Court, +High Coffee-grinder to the Porte, +Unpaid:-- + +[Illustration] + + In which exalted Post +His Lordship yielded up the ghost. + + + + +Lord Hippo + + +Lord Hippo suffered fearful loss + +[Illustration] + +By putting money on a horse +Which he believed, if it were pressed, +Would run far faster than the rest: +For + someone who was in the know + +[Illustration] + +Had confidently told him so. + +But + +[Illustration] + + on the morning of the race +It only took + +[Illustration] + + the _seventh_ place! + +[Illustration] + +Picture the Viscount's great surprise! +He scarcely could believe his eyes! +He sought the Individual who +Had laid him odds at 9 to 2, +Suggesting as a useful tip +That they should enter Partnership +And put to joint account the debt +Arising from his foolish bet. + +[Illustration] + +But when the Bookie--oh! my word, +I only wish you could have heard +The way he roared he did not think, +And hoped that they might strike him pink! +Lord Hippo simply turned and ran +From this infuriated man. +Despairing, maddened and distraught +He utterly collapsed and sought +His sire, + +[Illustration] + + the Earl of Potamus, +And brokenly addressed him thus: +"Dread Sire--to-day--at Ascot--I ..." +His genial parent made reply: +Come! Come! Come! Come! Don't look so glum! +Trust your Papa and name the sum.... + +WHAT? + +[Illustration] + + ... _Fifteen hundred thousand?_... Hum! +However ... stiffen up, you wreck; +Boys will be boys--so here's the cheque! +Lord Hippo, feeling deeply--well, +More grateful than he cared to tell-- +Punted the lot on Little Nell:-- +And got a telegram at dinner +To say + +[Illustration] + +that he had backed the Winner! + + + + +Lord Uncle Tom + + +Lord Uncle Tom was different from + What other nobles are. +For they are yellow or pink, I think, + But he was black as tar. + +[Illustration] + +He had his Father's debonair + And rather easy pride: +But his complexion and his hair + +[Illustration] + +Were from the mother's side. + +He often mingled in debate + And latterly displayed + +[Illustration] + +Experience of peculiar weight + Upon the Cocoa-trade. + +But now He speaks no more. The BILL + Which he could not abide, +It preyed upon his mind until + He sickened, paled, and died. + + + + +Lord Lucky + + +Lord Lucky, by a curious fluke, +Became a most important duke. +From living in a vile Hotel + +[Illustration] + +A long way east of Camberwell + +He rose, in less than half an hour, +To riches, dignity and power. +It happened in the following way:-- +The Real Duke went out one day +To shoot with several people, one + +[Illustration] + +Of whom had never used a gun. +This gentleman (a Mr. Meyer +Of Rabley Abbey, Rutlandshire), +As he was scrambling through the brake, + +[Illustration] + +Discharged his weapon by mistake, +And plugged about an ounce of lead +Piff-bang into his Grace's Head---- +Who naturally fell down dead. + +His heir, Lord Ugly, roared, "You Brute! + +[Illustration] + +Take that to teach you how to shoot!" +Whereat he volleyed, left and right; +But being somewhat short of sight, +His right-hand Barrel only got +The second heir, Lord Poddleplot; +The while the left-hand charge (or choke) +Accounted for another bloke, +Who stood with an astounded air +Bewildered by the whole affair +--And was the third remaining heir. + +After the + +[Illustration] + + Execution (which +Is something rare among the Rich) +Lord Lucky, while of course he needed +Some + +[Illustration] + + help to prove their claim, + succeeded. +--But after his succession, though +All this was over years ago, +He only once indulged the whim +Of asking Meyer to lunch with him. + + + + +Lord Canton + + +The reason that + +[Illustration] + + the Present Lord Canton +Succeeded lately to his Brother John +Was that his Brother John, the elder son, +Died rather suddenly at forty-one. + +The insolence of an Italian guide + +[Illustration] + +Appears to be the reason that he died. + + + + +Lord Abbott + + +Lord Abbott's coronet was far too small, +So small, that as he sauntered down White Hall +Even the youthful Proletariat +(Who probably mistook it for a Hat) +Remarked on its exiguous extent. + +[Illustration] + +Here is a picture of the incident. + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of More Peers Verses, by Hilaire Belloc + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MORE PEERS VERSES *** + +***** This file should be named 27182.txt or 27182.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/2/7/1/8/27182/ + +Produced by Chris Curnow, Joseph Cooper, Greg Bergquist, +some images courtesy of The Internet Archive and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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