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+ The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Hoofer, by Walter M. Miller, Jr.
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+<pre>
+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Hoofer, by Walter M. Miller
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The Hoofer
+
+Author: Walter M. Miller
+
+Release Date: June 19, 2009 [EBook #29170]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE HOOFER ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Greg Weeks, Stephen Blundell and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+
+<div class="bk1"><p><i><small>A wayfarer's return from a far country to his wife and family may be a
+shining experience, a kind of second honeymoon. Or it may be so shadowed
+by Time's relentless tyranny that the changes which have occurred in his
+absence can lead only to tragedy and despair. This rarely discerning, warmly
+human story by a brilliant newcomer to the science fantasy field is told
+with no pulling of punches, and its adroit unfolding will astound you.</small></i></p></div>
+
+<div class="bk2"><h1><b>the<br />
+hoofer</b></h1>
+
+<h2><small><i>by ... Walter M. Miller, Jr.</i></small></h2>
+
+<p class="pr1"><big><b>A space rover has no business with a family. But what can a man
+in the full vigor of youth do&mdash;if his heart cries out for a home?</b></big></p></div>
+
+<p class="cap"><span class="smcap">They all</span> knew he was a spacer
+because of the white goggle marks
+on his sun-scorched face, and so
+they tolerated him and helped him.
+They even made allowances for him
+when he staggered and fell in the
+aisle of the bus while pursuing the
+harassed little housewife from seat
+to seat and cajoling her to sit and
+talk with him.</p>
+
+<p>Having fallen, he decided to
+sleep in the aisle. Two men helped
+him to the back of the bus, dumped
+him on the rear seat, and tucked his
+gin bottle safely out of sight. After
+all, he had not seen Earth for nine
+months, and judging by the crusted
+matter about his eyelids, he couldn't
+have seen it too well now, even if
+he had been sober. Glare-blindness,
+gravity-legs, and agoraphobia were
+excuses for a lot of things, when a
+man was just back from Big Bottomless.
+And who could blame a
+man for acting strangely?</p>
+
+<p>Minutes later, he was back up the
+aisle and swaying giddily over the
+little housewife. "How!" he said.
+"Me Chief Broken Wing. You
+wanta Indian wrestle?"</p>
+
+<p>The girl, who sat nervously staring
+at him, smiled wanly, and
+shook her head.</p>
+
+<p>"Quiet li'l pigeon, aren'tcha?" he
+burbled affectionately, crashing into
+the seat beside her.</p>
+
+<p>The two men slid out of their
+seats, and a hand clamped his shoulder.
+"Come on, Broken Wing, let's
+go back to bed."</p>
+
+<p>"My name's Hogey," he said.
+"Big Hogey Parker. I was just kidding
+about being a Indian."</p>
+
+<p>"Yeah. Come on, let's go have a
+drink." They got him on his feet,
+and led him stumbling back down
+the aisle.</p>
+
+<p>"My ma was half Cherokee, see?
+That's how come I said it. You
+wanta hear a war whoop? Real
+stuff."</p>
+
+<p>"Never mind."</p>
+
+<p>He cupped his hands to his
+mouth and favored them with a
+blood-curdling proof of his ancestry,
+while the female passengers
+stirred restlessly and hunched in
+their seats. The driver stopped the
+bus and went back to warn him
+against any further display. The
+driver flashed a deputy's badge and
+threatened to turn him over to a
+constable.</p>
+
+<p>"I gotta get home," Big Hogey
+told him. "I got me a son now,
+that's why. You know? A little
+baby pigeon of a son. Haven't seen
+him yet."</p>
+
+<p>"Will you just sit still and be
+quiet then, eh?"</p>
+
+<p>Big Hogey nodded emphatically.
+"Shorry, officer, I didn't mean to
+make any trouble."</p>
+
+<p>When the bus started again, he
+fell on his side and lay still. He
+made retching sounds for a time,
+then rested, snoring softly. The bus
+driver woke him again at Caine's
+junction, retrieved his gin bottle
+from behind the seat, and helped
+him down the aisle and out of the
+bus.</p>
+
+<p>Big Hogey stumbled about for a
+moment, then sat down hard in the
+gravel at the shoulder of the road.
+The driver paused with one foot on
+the step, looking around. There was
+not even a store at the road junction,
+but only a freight building
+next to the railroad track, a couple
+of farmhouses at the edge of a side-road,
+and, just across the way, a deserted
+filling station with a sagging
+roof. The land was Great Plains
+country, treeless, barren, and rolling.</p>
+
+<p>Big Hogey got up and staggered
+around in front of the bus, clutching
+at it for support, losing his
+duffle bag.</p>
+
+<p>"Hey, watch the traffic!" The
+driver warned. With a surge of unwelcome
+compassion he trotted
+around after his troublesome passenger,
+taking his arm as he sagged
+again. "You crossing?"</p>
+
+<p>"Yah," Hogey muttered. "Lemme
+alone, I'm okay."</p>
+
+<p>The driver started across the
+highway with him. The traffic was
+sparse, but fast and dangerous in
+the central ninety-mile lane.</p>
+
+<p>"I'm okay," Hogey kept protesting.
+"I'm a tumbler, ya know?
+Gravity's got me. Damn gravity.
+I'm not used to gravity, ya know? I
+used to be a tumbler&mdash;<i>huk!</i>&mdash;only
+now I gotta be a hoofer. 'Count
+of li'l Hogey. You know about li'l
+Hogey?"</p>
+
+<p>"Yeah. Your son. Come on."</p>
+
+<p>"Say, you gotta son? I bet you
+gotta son."</p>
+
+<p>"Two kids," said the driver,
+catching Hogey's bag as it slipped
+from his shoulder. "Both girls."</p>
+
+<p>"Say, you oughta be home with
+them kids. Man oughta stick with
+his family. You oughta get another
+job." Hogey eyed him owlishly,
+waggled a moralistic finger, skidded
+on the gravel as they stepped
+onto the opposite shoulder, and
+sprawled again.</p>
+
+<p>The driver blew a weary breath,
+looked down at him, and shook his
+head. Maybe it'd be kinder to find
+a constable after all. This guy could
+get himself killed, wandering
+around loose.</p>
+
+<p>"Somebody supposed to meet
+you?" he asked, squinting around
+at the dusty hills.</p>
+
+<p>"<i>Huk!</i>&mdash;who, me?" Hogey giggled,
+belched, and shook his head.
+"Nope. Nobody knows I'm coming.
+S'prise. I'm supposed to be here a
+week ago." He looked up at the
+driver with a pained expression.
+"Week late, ya know? Marie's
+gonna be sore&mdash;woo-<i>hoo</i>!&mdash;is she
+gonna be sore!" He waggled his
+head severely at the ground.</p>
+
+<p>"Which way are you going?" the
+driver grunted impatiently.</p>
+
+<p>Hogey pointed down the side-road
+that led back into the hills.
+"Marie's pop's place. You know
+where? 'Bout three miles from
+here. Gotta walk, I guess."</p>
+
+<p>"Don't," the driver warned.
+"You sit there by the culvert till
+you get a ride. Okay?"</p>
+
+<p>Hogey nodded forlornly.</p>
+
+<p>"Now stay out of the road," the
+driver warned, then hurried back
+across the highway. Moments later,
+the atomic battery-driven motors
+droned mournfully, and the bus
+pulled away.</p>
+
+<p>Big Hogey blinked after it, rubbing
+the back of his neck. "Nice
+people," he said. "Nice buncha people.
+All hoofers."</p>
+
+<p>With a grunt and a lurch, he got
+to his feet, but his legs wouldn't
+work right. With his tumbler's reflexes,
+he fought to right himself
+with frantic arm motions, but gravity
+claimed him, and he went stumbling
+into the ditch.</p>
+
+<p>"Damn legs, damn crazy legs!"
+he cried.</p>
+
+<p>The bottom of the ditch was wet,
+and he crawled up the embankment
+with mud-soaked knees, and sat on
+the shoulder again. The gin bottle
+was still intact. He had himself a
+long fiery drink, and it warmed him
+deep down. He blinked around at
+the gaunt and treeless land.</p>
+
+<p>The sun was almost down, forge-red
+on a dusty horizon. The blood-streaked
+sky faded into sulphurous
+yellow toward the zenith, and the
+very air that hung over the land
+seemed full of yellow smoke, the
+omnipresent dust of the plains.</p>
+
+<p>A farm truck turned onto the
+side-road and moaned away, its
+driver hardly glancing at the dark
+young man who sat swaying on his
+duffle bag near the culvert. Hogey
+scarcely noticed the vehicle. He just
+kept staring at the crazy sun.</p>
+
+<p>He shook his head. It wasn't really
+the sun. The sun, the real sun,
+was a hateful eye-sizzling horror in
+the dead black pit. It painted everything
+with pure white pain, and you
+saw things by the reflected pain-light.
+The fat red sun was strictly a
+phoney, and it didn't fool him any.
+He hated it for what he knew it was
+behind the gory mask, and for what
+it had done to his eyes.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>With a grunt, he got to his feet,
+managed to shoulder the duffle bag,
+and started off down the middle of
+the farm road, lurching from side
+to side, and keeping his eyes on the
+rolling distances. Another car turned
+onto the side-road, honking angrily.</p>
+
+<p>Hogey tried to turn around to
+look at it, but he forgot to shift his
+footing. He staggered and went
+down on the pavement. The car's
+tires screeched on the hot asphalt.
+Hogey lay there for a moment,
+groaning. That one had hurt his
+hip. A car door slammed and a big
+man with a florid face got out and
+stalked toward him, looking angry.</p>
+
+<p>"What the hell's the matter with
+you, fella?" he drawled. "You
+soused? Man, you've really got a
+load."</p>
+
+<p>Hogey got up doggedly, shaking
+his head to clear it. "Space legs," he
+prevaricated. "Got space legs. Can't
+stand the gravity."</p>
+
+<p>The burly farmer retrieved his
+gin bottle for him, still miraculously
+unbroken. "Here's your gravity,"
+he grunted. "Listen, fella, you better
+get home pronto."</p>
+
+<p>"Pronto? Hey, I'm no Mex. Honest,
+I'm just space burned. You
+know?"</p>
+
+<p>"Yeah. Say, who are you, anyway?
+Do you live around here?"</p>
+
+<p>It was obvious that the big man
+had taken him for a hobo or a
+tramp. Hogey pulled himself together.
+"Goin' to the Hauptman's
+place. Marie. You know Marie?"</p>
+
+<p>The farmer's eyebrows went up.
+"Marie Hauptman? Sure I know
+her. Only she's Marie Parker now.
+Has been, nigh on six years. Say&mdash;"
+He paused, then gaped. "You ain't
+her husband by any chance?"</p>
+
+<p>"Hogey, that's me. Big Hogey
+Parker."</p>
+
+<p>"Well, I'll be&mdash;! Get in the car.
+I'm going right past John Hauptman's
+place. Boy, you're in no
+shape to walk it."</p>
+
+<p>He grinned wryly, waggled his
+head, and helped Hogey and his
+bag into the back seat. A woman
+with a sun-wrinkled neck sat rigidly
+beside the farmer in the front,
+and she neither greeted the passenger
+nor looked around.</p>
+
+<p>"They don't make cars like this
+anymore," the farmer called over
+the growl of the ancient gasoline
+engine and the grind of gears.
+"You can have them new atomics
+with their loads of hot isotopes
+under the seat. Ain't safe, I say&mdash;eh,
+Martha?"</p>
+
+<p>The woman with the sun-baked
+neck quivered her head slightly.
+"A car like this was good enough
+for Pa, an' I reckon it's good
+enough for us," she drawled mournfully.</p>
+
+<p>Five minutes later the car drew
+in to the side of the road. "Reckon
+you can walk it from here," the
+farmer said. "That's Hauptman's
+road just up ahead."</p>
+
+<p>He helped Hogey out of the car
+and drove away without looking
+back to see if Hogey stayed on his
+feet. The woman with the sun-baked
+neck was suddenly talking
+garrulously in his direction.</p>
+
+<p>It was twilight. The sun had set,
+and the yellow sky was turning
+gray. Hogey was too tired to go on,
+and his legs would no longer hold
+him. He blinked around at the land,
+got his eyes focused, and found
+what looked like Hauptman's place
+on a distant hillside. It was a big
+frame house surrounded by a wheatfield,
+and a few scrawny trees. Having
+located it, he stretched out in
+the tall grass beyond the ditch to
+take a little rest.</p>
+
+<p>Somewhere dogs were barking,
+and a cricket sang creaking monotony
+in the grass. Once there was the
+distant thunder of a rocket blast
+from the launching station six miles
+to the west, but it faded quickly. An
+A-motored convertible whined past
+on the road, but Hogey went unseen.</p>
+
+<p>When he awoke, it was night,
+and he was shivering. His stomach
+was screeching, and his nerves dancing
+with high voltages. He sat up
+and groped for his watch, then remembered
+he had pawned it after
+the poker game. Remembering the
+game and the results of the game
+made him wince and bite his lip
+and grope for the bottle again.</p>
+
+<p>He sat breathing heavily for a
+moment after the stiff drink. Equating
+time to position had become
+second nature with him, but he had
+to think for a moment because his
+defective vision prevented him from
+seeing the Earth-crescent.</p>
+
+<p>Vega was almost straight above
+him in the late August sky, so he
+knew it wasn't much after sundown&mdash;probably
+about eight o'clock. He
+braced himself with another swallow
+of gin, picked himself up and
+got back to the road, feeling a little
+sobered after the nap.</p>
+
+<p>He limped on up the pavement
+and turned left at the narrow drive
+that led between barbed-wire fences
+toward the Hauptman farmhouse,
+five hundred yards or so from the
+farm road. The fields on his left
+belonged to Marie's father, he
+knew. He was getting close&mdash;close
+to home and woman and child.</p>
+
+<p>He dropped the bag suddenly
+and leaned against a fence post,
+rolling his head on his forearms
+and choking in spasms of air. He
+was shaking all over, and his belly
+writhed. He wanted to turn and
+run. He wanted to crawl out in the
+grass and hide.</p>
+
+<p>What were they going to say?
+And Marie, Marie most of all.
+How was he going to tell her about
+the money?</p>
+
+<p>Six hitches in space, and every
+time the promise had been the
+same: <i>One more tour, baby, and
+we'll have enough dough, and then
+I'll quit for good. One more time,
+and we'll have our stake&mdash;enough
+to open a little business, or buy a
+house with a mortgage and get a
+job.</i></p>
+
+<p>And she had waited, but the
+money had never been quite enough
+until this time. This time the tour
+had lasted nine months, and he had
+signed on for every run from station
+to moon-base to pick up the
+bonuses. And this time he'd made
+it. Two weeks ago, there had been
+forty-eight hundred in the bank.
+And now ...</p>
+
+<p>"<i>Why?</i>" he groaned, striking his
+forehead against his forearms. His
+arm slipped, and his head hit the
+top of the fencepost, and the pain
+blinded him for a moment. He staggered
+back into the road with a
+low roar, wiped blood from his
+forehead, and savagely kicked his
+bag.</p>
+
+<p>It rolled a couple of yards up the
+road. He leaped after it and kicked
+it again. When he had finished
+with it, he stood panting and angry,
+but feeling better. He shouldered
+the bag and hiked on toward the
+farmhouse.</p>
+
+<p>They're hoofers, that's all&mdash;just
+an Earth-chained bunch of hoofers,
+even Marie. And I'm a tumbler. A
+born tumbler. Know what that
+means? It means&mdash;God, what does
+it mean? It means out in Big Bottomless,
+where Earth's like a fat
+moon with fuzzy mold growing on
+it. Mold, that's all you are, just
+mold.</p>
+
+<p>A dog barked, and he wondered
+if he had been muttering aloud. He
+came to a fence-gap and paused in
+the darkness. The road wound
+around and came up the hill in
+front of the house. Maybe they were
+sitting on the porch. Maybe they'd
+already heard him coming. Maybe ...</p>
+
+<p>He was trembling again. He
+fished the fifth of gin out of his
+coat pocket and sloshed it. Still over
+half a pint. He decided to kill it. It
+wouldn't do to go home with a
+bottle sticking out of his pocket.
+He stood there in the night wind,
+sipping at it, and watching the reddish
+moon come up in the east. The
+moon looked as phoney as the
+setting sun.</p>
+
+<p>He straightened in sudden determination.
+It had to be sometime.
+Get it over with, get it over with
+now. He opened the fence-gap, slipped
+through, and closed it firmly
+behind him. He retrieved his bag,
+and waded quietly through the tall
+grass until he reached the hedge
+which divided an area of sickly
+peach trees from the field. He got
+over the hedge somehow, and started
+through the trees toward the
+house. He stumbled over some old
+boards, and they clattered.</p>
+
+<p>"<i>Shhh!</i>" he hissed, and moved
+on.</p>
+
+<p>The dogs were barking angrily,
+and he heard a screen door slam.
+He stopped.</p>
+
+<p>"Ho there!" a male voice called
+experimentally from the house.</p>
+
+<p>One of Marie's brothers. Hogey
+stood frozen in the shadow of a
+peach tree, waiting.</p>
+
+<p>"Anybody out there?" the man
+called again.</p>
+
+<p>Hogey waited, then heard the
+man muttering, "Sic 'im, boy, sic
+'im."</p>
+
+<p>The hound's bark became eager.
+The animal came chasing down the
+slope, and stopped ten feet away to
+crouch and bark frantically at the
+shadow in the gloom. He knew the
+dog.</p>
+
+<p>"Hooky!" he whispered. "Hooky
+boy&mdash;here!"</p>
+
+<p>The dog stopped barking, sniffed,
+trotted closer, and went
+"<i>Rrrooff!</i>" Then he started sniffing
+suspiciously again.</p>
+
+<p>"Easy, Hooky, here boy!" he
+whispered.</p>
+
+<p>The dog came forward silently,
+sniffed his hand, and whined in
+recognition. Then he trotted around
+Hogey, panting doggy affection and
+dancing an invitation to romp. The
+man whistled from the porch. The
+dog froze, then trotted quickly back
+up the slope.</p>
+
+<p>"Nothing, eh, Hooky?" the
+man on the porch said. "Chasin'
+armadillos again, eh?"</p>
+
+<p>The screen door slammed again,
+and the porch light went out.
+Hogey stood there staring, unable
+to think. Somewhere beyond the
+window lights were&mdash;his woman,
+his son.</p>
+
+<p>What the hell was a tumbler doing
+with a woman and a son?</p>
+
+<p>After perhaps a minute, he stepped
+forward again. He tripped over
+a shovel, and his foot plunged into
+something that went <i>squelch</i> and
+swallowed the foot past the ankle.
+He fell forward into a heap of
+sand, and his foot went deeper into
+the sloppy wetness.</p>
+
+<p>He lay there with his stinging
+forehead on his arms, cursing softly
+and crying. Finally he rolled
+over, pulled his foot out of the
+mess, and took off his shoes. They
+were full of mud&mdash;sticky sandy
+mud.</p>
+
+<p>The dark world was reeling
+about him, and the wind was dragging
+at his breath. He fell back
+against the sand pile and let his
+feet sink in the mud hole and wriggled
+his toes. He was laughing
+soundlessly, and his face was wet
+in the wind. He couldn't think. He
+couldn't remember where he was
+and why, and he stopped caring,
+and after a while he felt better.</p>
+
+<p>The stars were swimming over
+him, dancing crazily, and the mud
+cooled his feet, and the sand was
+soft behind him. He saw a rocket
+go up on a tail of flame from the
+station, and waited for the sound of
+its blast, but he was already asleep
+when it came.</p>
+
+<p>It was far past midnight when he
+became conscious of the dog licking
+wetly at his ear and cheek. He
+pushed the animal away with a low
+curse and mopped at the side of his
+face. He stirred, and groaned. His
+feet were burning up! He tried to
+pull them toward him, but they
+wouldn't budge. There was something
+wrong with his legs.</p>
+
+<p>For an instant he stared wildly
+around in the night. Then he remembered
+where he was, closed his
+eyes and shuddered. When he
+opened them again, the moon had
+emerged from behind a cloud, and
+he could see clearly the cruel trap
+into which he had accidentally
+stumbled. A pile of old boards, a
+careful stack of new lumber, a
+pick and shovel, a sand-pile, heaps
+of fresh-turned earth, and a concrete
+mixer&mdash;well, it added up.</p>
+
+<p>He gripped his ankles and pulled,
+but his feet wouldn't budge. In
+sudden terror, he tried to stand up,
+but his ankles were clutched by the
+concrete too, and he fell back in
+the sand with a low moan. He lay
+still for several minutes, considering
+carefully.</p>
+
+<p>He pulled at his left foot. It was
+locked in a vise. He tugged even
+more desperately at his right foot.
+It was equally immovable.</p>
+
+<p>He sat up with a whimper and
+clawed at the rough concrete until
+his nails tore and his fingertips
+bled. The surface still felt damp,
+but it had hardened while he slept.</p>
+
+<p>He sat there stunned until Hooky
+began licking at his scuffed fingers.
+He shouldered the dog away, and
+dug his hands into the sand-pile to
+stop the bleeding. Hooky licked at
+his face, panting love.</p>
+
+<p>"Get away!" he croaked savagely.</p>
+
+<p>The dog whined softly, trotted
+a short distance away, circled, and
+came back to crouch down in the
+sand directly before Hogey, inching
+forward experimentally.</p>
+
+<p>Hogey gripped fistfuls of the dry
+sand and cursed between his teeth,
+while his eyes wandered over the
+sky. They came to rest on the sliver
+of light&mdash;the space station&mdash;rising
+in the west, floating out in Big Bottomless
+where the gang was&mdash;Nichols
+and Guerrera and Lavrenti
+and Fats. And he wasn't forgetting
+Keesey, the rookie who'd replaced
+him.</p>
+
+<p>Keesey would have a rough time
+for a while&mdash;rough as a cob. The pit
+was no playground. The first time
+you went out of the station in a
+suit, the pit got you. Everything
+was falling, and you fell, with it.
+Everything. The skeletons of steel,
+the tire-shaped station, the spheres
+and docks and nightmare shapes&mdash;all
+tied together by umbilical cables
+and flexible tubes. Like some crazy
+sea-thing they seemed, floating in a
+black ocean with its tentacles bound
+together by drifting strands in the
+dark tide that bore it.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>Everything was pain-bright or
+dead black, and it wheeled around
+you, and you went nuts trying to
+figure which way was down. In fact,
+it took you months to teach your
+body that <i>all</i> ways were down and
+that the pit was bottomless.</p>
+
+<p>He became conscious of a plaintive
+sound in the wind, and froze to
+listen.</p>
+
+<p>It was a baby crying.</p>
+
+<p>It was nearly a minute before he
+got the significance of it. It hit him
+where he lived, and he began jerking
+frantically at his encased feet
+and sobbing low in his throat.
+They'd hear him if he kept that up.
+He stopped and covered his ears to
+close out the cry of his firstborn. A
+light went on in the house, and
+when it went off again, the infant's
+cry had ceased.</p>
+
+<p>Another rocket went up from the
+station, and he cursed it. Space was
+a disease, and he had it.</p>
+
+<p>"Help!" he cried out suddenly.
+"I'm stuck! Help me, help me!"</p>
+
+<p>He knew he was yelling hysterically
+at the sky and fighting the relentless
+concrete that clutched his
+feet, and after a moment he stopped.</p>
+
+<p>The light was on in the house
+again, and he heard faint sounds.
+The stirring-about woke the baby
+again, and once more the infant's
+wail came on the breeze.</p>
+
+<p><i>Make the kid shut up, make the
+kid shut up ...</i></p>
+
+<p>But that was no good. It wasn't
+the kid's fault. It wasn't Marie's
+fault. No fathers allowed in space,
+they said, but it wasn't their fault
+either. They were right, and he had
+only himself to blame. The kid was
+an accident, but that didn't change
+anything. Not a thing in the world.
+It remained a tragedy.</p>
+
+<p>A tumbler had no business with a
+family, but what was a man going
+to do? Take a skinning knife, boy,
+and make yourself a eunuch. But
+that was no good either. They needed
+bulls out there in the pit, not
+steers. And when a man came down
+from a year's hitch, what was he
+going to do? Live in a lonely shack
+and read books for kicks? Because
+you were a man, you sought out a
+woman. And because she was a
+woman, she got a kid, and that was
+the end of it. It was nobody's fault,
+nobody's at all.</p>
+
+<p>He stared at the red eye of Mars
+low in the southwest. They were
+running out there now, and next
+year he would have been on the
+long long run ...</p>
+
+<p>But there was no use thinking
+about it. Next year and the years
+after belonged to <i>little</i> Hogey.</p>
+
+<p>He sat there with his feet locked
+in the solid concrete of the footing,
+staring out into Big Bottomless
+while his son's cry came from the
+house and the Hauptman menfolk
+came wading through the tall grass
+in search of someone who had cried
+out. His feet were stuck tight, and
+he wouldn't ever get them out. He
+was sobbing softly when they found
+him.</p>
+
+<div class="trn"><b>Transcriber's Note:</b>
+This etext was produced from <i>Fantastic Universe</i> September 1955.
+Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S.
+copyright on this publication was renewed. Minor spelling and
+typographical errors have been corrected without note.</div>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Hoofer, by Walter M. Miller
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+</pre>
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+</body>
+</html>
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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Hoofer, by Walter M. Miller
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The Hoofer
+
+Author: Walter M. Miller
+
+Release Date: June 19, 2009 [EBook #29170]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE HOOFER ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Greg Weeks, Stephen Blundell and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+ _A wayfarer's return from a far country to his wife and family may
+ be a shining experience, a kind of second honeymoon. Or it may be so
+ shadowed by Time's relentless tyranny that the changes which have
+ occurred in his absence can lead only to tragedy and despair. This
+ rarely discerning, warmly human story by a brilliant newcomer to the
+ science fantasy field is told with no pulling of punches, and its
+ adroit unfolding will astound you._
+
+
+ the
+ hoofer
+
+ _by ... Walter M. Miller, Jr._
+
+
+ A space rover has no business with a family. But what can a man
+ in the full vigor of youth do--if his heart cries out for a home?
+
+
+They all knew he was a spacer because of the white goggle marks on his
+sun-scorched face, and so they tolerated him and helped him. They even
+made allowances for him when he staggered and fell in the aisle of the
+bus while pursuing the harassed little housewife from seat to seat and
+cajoling her to sit and talk with him.
+
+Having fallen, he decided to sleep in the aisle. Two men helped him to
+the back of the bus, dumped him on the rear seat, and tucked his gin
+bottle safely out of sight. After all, he had not seen Earth for nine
+months, and judging by the crusted matter about his eyelids, he couldn't
+have seen it too well now, even if he had been sober. Glare-blindness,
+gravity-legs, and agoraphobia were excuses for a lot of things, when a
+man was just back from Big Bottomless. And who could blame a man for
+acting strangely?
+
+Minutes later, he was back up the aisle and swaying giddily over the
+little housewife. "How!" he said. "Me Chief Broken Wing. You wanta
+Indian wrestle?"
+
+The girl, who sat nervously staring at him, smiled wanly, and shook her
+head.
+
+"Quiet li'l pigeon, aren'tcha?" he burbled affectionately, crashing into
+the seat beside her.
+
+The two men slid out of their seats, and a hand clamped his shoulder.
+"Come on, Broken Wing, let's go back to bed."
+
+"My name's Hogey," he said. "Big Hogey Parker. I was just kidding about
+being a Indian."
+
+"Yeah. Come on, let's go have a drink." They got him on his feet, and
+led him stumbling back down the aisle.
+
+"My ma was half Cherokee, see? That's how come I said it. You wanta hear
+a war whoop? Real stuff."
+
+"Never mind."
+
+He cupped his hands to his mouth and favored them with a blood-curdling
+proof of his ancestry, while the female passengers stirred restlessly
+and hunched in their seats. The driver stopped the bus and went back to
+warn him against any further display. The driver flashed a deputy's
+badge and threatened to turn him over to a constable.
+
+"I gotta get home," Big Hogey told him. "I got me a son now, that's why.
+You know? A little baby pigeon of a son. Haven't seen him yet."
+
+"Will you just sit still and be quiet then, eh?"
+
+Big Hogey nodded emphatically. "Shorry, officer, I didn't mean to make
+any trouble."
+
+When the bus started again, he fell on his side and lay still. He made
+retching sounds for a time, then rested, snoring softly. The bus driver
+woke him again at Caine's junction, retrieved his gin bottle from behind
+the seat, and helped him down the aisle and out of the bus.
+
+Big Hogey stumbled about for a moment, then sat down hard in the gravel
+at the shoulder of the road. The driver paused with one foot on the
+step, looking around. There was not even a store at the road junction,
+but only a freight building next to the railroad track, a couple of
+farmhouses at the edge of a side-road, and, just across the way, a
+deserted filling station with a sagging roof. The land was Great Plains
+country, treeless, barren, and rolling.
+
+Big Hogey got up and staggered around in front of the bus, clutching at
+it for support, losing his duffle bag.
+
+"Hey, watch the traffic!" The driver warned. With a surge of unwelcome
+compassion he trotted around after his troublesome passenger, taking his
+arm as he sagged again. "You crossing?"
+
+"Yah," Hogey muttered. "Lemme alone, I'm okay."
+
+The driver started across the highway with him. The traffic was sparse,
+but fast and dangerous in the central ninety-mile lane.
+
+"I'm okay," Hogey kept protesting. "I'm a tumbler, ya know? Gravity's
+got me. Damn gravity. I'm not used to gravity, ya know? I used to be a
+tumbler--_huk!_--only now I gotta be a hoofer. 'Count of li'l Hogey. You
+know about li'l Hogey?"
+
+"Yeah. Your son. Come on."
+
+"Say, you gotta son? I bet you gotta son."
+
+"Two kids," said the driver, catching Hogey's bag as it slipped from his
+shoulder. "Both girls."
+
+"Say, you oughta be home with them kids. Man oughta stick with his
+family. You oughta get another job." Hogey eyed him owlishly, waggled a
+moralistic finger, skidded on the gravel as they stepped onto the
+opposite shoulder, and sprawled again.
+
+The driver blew a weary breath, looked down at him, and shook his head.
+Maybe it'd be kinder to find a constable after all. This guy could get
+himself killed, wandering around loose.
+
+"Somebody supposed to meet you?" he asked, squinting around at the dusty
+hills.
+
+"_Huk!_--who, me?" Hogey giggled, belched, and shook his head. "Nope.
+Nobody knows I'm coming. S'prise. I'm supposed to be here a week ago."
+He looked up at the driver with a pained expression. "Week late, ya
+know? Marie's gonna be sore--woo-_hoo_!--is she gonna be sore!" He
+waggled his head severely at the ground.
+
+"Which way are you going?" the driver grunted impatiently.
+
+Hogey pointed down the side-road that led back into the hills. "Marie's
+pop's place. You know where? 'Bout three miles from here. Gotta walk, I
+guess."
+
+"Don't," the driver warned. "You sit there by the culvert till you get a
+ride. Okay?"
+
+Hogey nodded forlornly.
+
+"Now stay out of the road," the driver warned, then hurried back across
+the highway. Moments later, the atomic battery-driven motors droned
+mournfully, and the bus pulled away.
+
+Big Hogey blinked after it, rubbing the back of his neck. "Nice people,"
+he said. "Nice buncha people. All hoofers."
+
+With a grunt and a lurch, he got to his feet, but his legs wouldn't work
+right. With his tumbler's reflexes, he fought to right himself with
+frantic arm motions, but gravity claimed him, and he went stumbling into
+the ditch.
+
+"Damn legs, damn crazy legs!" he cried.
+
+The bottom of the ditch was wet, and he crawled up the embankment with
+mud-soaked knees, and sat on the shoulder again. The gin bottle was
+still intact. He had himself a long fiery drink, and it warmed him deep
+down. He blinked around at the gaunt and treeless land.
+
+The sun was almost down, forge-red on a dusty horizon. The
+blood-streaked sky faded into sulphurous yellow toward the zenith, and
+the very air that hung over the land seemed full of yellow smoke, the
+omnipresent dust of the plains.
+
+A farm truck turned onto the side-road and moaned away, its driver
+hardly glancing at the dark young man who sat swaying on his duffle bag
+near the culvert. Hogey scarcely noticed the vehicle. He just kept
+staring at the crazy sun.
+
+He shook his head. It wasn't really the sun. The sun, the real sun, was
+a hateful eye-sizzling horror in the dead black pit. It painted
+everything with pure white pain, and you saw things by the reflected
+pain-light. The fat red sun was strictly a phoney, and it didn't fool
+him any. He hated it for what he knew it was behind the gory mask, and
+for what it had done to his eyes.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+With a grunt, he got to his feet, managed to shoulder the duffle bag,
+and started off down the middle of the farm road, lurching from side to
+side, and keeping his eyes on the rolling distances. Another car turned
+onto the side-road, honking angrily.
+
+Hogey tried to turn around to look at it, but he forgot to shift his
+footing. He staggered and went down on the pavement. The car's tires
+screeched on the hot asphalt. Hogey lay there for a moment, groaning.
+That one had hurt his hip. A car door slammed and a big man with a
+florid face got out and stalked toward him, looking angry.
+
+"What the hell's the matter with you, fella?" he drawled. "You soused?
+Man, you've really got a load."
+
+Hogey got up doggedly, shaking his head to clear it. "Space legs," he
+prevaricated. "Got space legs. Can't stand the gravity."
+
+The burly farmer retrieved his gin bottle for him, still miraculously
+unbroken. "Here's your gravity," he grunted. "Listen, fella, you better
+get home pronto."
+
+"Pronto? Hey, I'm no Mex. Honest, I'm just space burned. You know?"
+
+"Yeah. Say, who are you, anyway? Do you live around here?"
+
+It was obvious that the big man had taken him for a hobo or a tramp.
+Hogey pulled himself together. "Goin' to the Hauptman's place. Marie.
+You know Marie?"
+
+The farmer's eyebrows went up. "Marie Hauptman? Sure I know her. Only
+she's Marie Parker now. Has been, nigh on six years. Say--" He paused,
+then gaped. "You ain't her husband by any chance?"
+
+"Hogey, that's me. Big Hogey Parker."
+
+"Well, I'll be--! Get in the car. I'm going right past John Hauptman's
+place. Boy, you're in no shape to walk it."
+
+He grinned wryly, waggled his head, and helped Hogey and his bag into
+the back seat. A woman with a sun-wrinkled neck sat rigidly beside the
+farmer in the front, and she neither greeted the passenger nor looked
+around.
+
+"They don't make cars like this anymore," the farmer called over the
+growl of the ancient gasoline engine and the grind of gears. "You can
+have them new atomics with their loads of hot isotopes under the seat.
+Ain't safe, I say--eh, Martha?"
+
+The woman with the sun-baked neck quivered her head slightly. "A car
+like this was good enough for Pa, an' I reckon it's good enough for us,"
+she drawled mournfully.
+
+Five minutes later the car drew in to the side of the road. "Reckon you
+can walk it from here," the farmer said. "That's Hauptman's road just up
+ahead."
+
+He helped Hogey out of the car and drove away without looking back to
+see if Hogey stayed on his feet. The woman with the sun-baked neck was
+suddenly talking garrulously in his direction.
+
+It was twilight. The sun had set, and the yellow sky was turning gray.
+Hogey was too tired to go on, and his legs would no longer hold him. He
+blinked around at the land, got his eyes focused, and found what looked
+like Hauptman's place on a distant hillside. It was a big frame house
+surrounded by a wheatfield, and a few scrawny trees. Having located it,
+he stretched out in the tall grass beyond the ditch to take a little
+rest.
+
+Somewhere dogs were barking, and a cricket sang creaking monotony in the
+grass. Once there was the distant thunder of a rocket blast from the
+launching station six miles to the west, but it faded quickly. An
+A-motored convertible whined past on the road, but Hogey went unseen.
+
+When he awoke, it was night, and he was shivering. His stomach was
+screeching, and his nerves dancing with high voltages. He sat up and
+groped for his watch, then remembered he had pawned it after the poker
+game. Remembering the game and the results of the game made him wince
+and bite his lip and grope for the bottle again.
+
+He sat breathing heavily for a moment after the stiff drink. Equating
+time to position had become second nature with him, but he had to think
+for a moment because his defective vision prevented him from seeing the
+Earth-crescent.
+
+Vega was almost straight above him in the late August sky, so he knew it
+wasn't much after sundown--probably about eight o'clock. He braced
+himself with another swallow of gin, picked himself up and got back to
+the road, feeling a little sobered after the nap.
+
+He limped on up the pavement and turned left at the narrow drive that
+led between barbed-wire fences toward the Hauptman farmhouse, five
+hundred yards or so from the farm road. The fields on his left belonged
+to Marie's father, he knew. He was getting close--close to home and
+woman and child.
+
+He dropped the bag suddenly and leaned against a fence post, rolling his
+head on his forearms and choking in spasms of air. He was shaking all
+over, and his belly writhed. He wanted to turn and run. He wanted to
+crawl out in the grass and hide.
+
+What were they going to say? And Marie, Marie most of all. How was he
+going to tell her about the money?
+
+Six hitches in space, and every time the promise had been the same: _One
+more tour, baby, and we'll have enough dough, and then I'll quit for
+good. One more time, and we'll have our stake--enough to open a little
+business, or buy a house with a mortgage and get a job._
+
+And she had waited, but the money had never been quite enough until this
+time. This time the tour had lasted nine months, and he had signed on
+for every run from station to moon-base to pick up the bonuses. And this
+time he'd made it. Two weeks ago, there had been forty-eight hundred in
+the bank. And now ...
+
+"_Why?_" he groaned, striking his forehead against his forearms. His arm
+slipped, and his head hit the top of the fencepost, and the pain blinded
+him for a moment. He staggered back into the road with a low roar, wiped
+blood from his forehead, and savagely kicked his bag.
+
+It rolled a couple of yards up the road. He leaped after it and kicked
+it again. When he had finished with it, he stood panting and angry, but
+feeling better. He shouldered the bag and hiked on toward the farmhouse.
+
+They're hoofers, that's all--just an Earth-chained bunch of hoofers,
+even Marie. And I'm a tumbler. A born tumbler. Know what that means? It
+means--God, what does it mean? It means out in Big Bottomless, where
+Earth's like a fat moon with fuzzy mold growing on it. Mold, that's all
+you are, just mold.
+
+A dog barked, and he wondered if he had been muttering aloud. He came to
+a fence-gap and paused in the darkness. The road wound around and came
+up the hill in front of the house. Maybe they were sitting on the porch.
+Maybe they'd already heard him coming. Maybe ...
+
+He was trembling again. He fished the fifth of gin out of his coat
+pocket and sloshed it. Still over half a pint. He decided to kill it. It
+wouldn't do to go home with a bottle sticking out of his pocket. He
+stood there in the night wind, sipping at it, and watching the reddish
+moon come up in the east. The moon looked as phoney as the setting sun.
+
+He straightened in sudden determination. It had to be sometime. Get it
+over with, get it over with now. He opened the fence-gap, slipped
+through, and closed it firmly behind him. He retrieved his bag, and
+waded quietly through the tall grass until he reached the hedge which
+divided an area of sickly peach trees from the field. He got over the
+hedge somehow, and started through the trees toward the house. He
+stumbled over some old boards, and they clattered.
+
+"_Shhh!_" he hissed, and moved on.
+
+The dogs were barking angrily, and he heard a screen door slam. He
+stopped.
+
+"Ho there!" a male voice called experimentally from the house.
+
+One of Marie's brothers. Hogey stood frozen in the shadow of a peach
+tree, waiting.
+
+"Anybody out there?" the man called again.
+
+Hogey waited, then heard the man muttering, "Sic 'im, boy, sic 'im."
+
+The hound's bark became eager. The animal came chasing down the slope,
+and stopped ten feet away to crouch and bark frantically at the shadow
+in the gloom. He knew the dog.
+
+"Hooky!" he whispered. "Hooky boy--here!"
+
+The dog stopped barking, sniffed, trotted closer, and went "_Rrrooff!_"
+Then he started sniffing suspiciously again.
+
+"Easy, Hooky, here boy!" he whispered.
+
+The dog came forward silently, sniffed his hand, and whined in
+recognition. Then he trotted around Hogey, panting doggy affection and
+dancing an invitation to romp. The man whistled from the porch. The dog
+froze, then trotted quickly back up the slope.
+
+"Nothing, eh, Hooky?" the man on the porch said. "Chasin' armadillos
+again, eh?"
+
+The screen door slammed again, and the porch light went out. Hogey stood
+there staring, unable to think. Somewhere beyond the window lights
+were--his woman, his son.
+
+What the hell was a tumbler doing with a woman and a son?
+
+After perhaps a minute, he stepped forward again. He tripped over a
+shovel, and his foot plunged into something that went _squelch_ and
+swallowed the foot past the ankle. He fell forward into a heap of sand,
+and his foot went deeper into the sloppy wetness.
+
+He lay there with his stinging forehead on his arms, cursing softly and
+crying. Finally he rolled over, pulled his foot out of the mess, and
+took off his shoes. They were full of mud--sticky sandy mud.
+
+The dark world was reeling about him, and the wind was dragging at his
+breath. He fell back against the sand pile and let his feet sink in the
+mud hole and wriggled his toes. He was laughing soundlessly, and his
+face was wet in the wind. He couldn't think. He couldn't remember where
+he was and why, and he stopped caring, and after a while he felt better.
+
+The stars were swimming over him, dancing crazily, and the mud cooled
+his feet, and the sand was soft behind him. He saw a rocket go up on a
+tail of flame from the station, and waited for the sound of its blast,
+but he was already asleep when it came.
+
+It was far past midnight when he became conscious of the dog licking
+wetly at his ear and cheek. He pushed the animal away with a low curse
+and mopped at the side of his face. He stirred, and groaned. His feet
+were burning up! He tried to pull them toward him, but they wouldn't
+budge. There was something wrong with his legs.
+
+For an instant he stared wildly around in the night. Then he remembered
+where he was, closed his eyes and shuddered. When he opened them again,
+the moon had emerged from behind a cloud, and he could see clearly the
+cruel trap into which he had accidentally stumbled. A pile of old
+boards, a careful stack of new lumber, a pick and shovel, a sand-pile,
+heaps of fresh-turned earth, and a concrete mixer--well, it added up.
+
+He gripped his ankles and pulled, but his feet wouldn't budge. In sudden
+terror, he tried to stand up, but his ankles were clutched by the
+concrete too, and he fell back in the sand with a low moan. He lay still
+for several minutes, considering carefully.
+
+He pulled at his left foot. It was locked in a vise. He tugged even more
+desperately at his right foot. It was equally immovable.
+
+He sat up with a whimper and clawed at the rough concrete until his
+nails tore and his fingertips bled. The surface still felt damp, but it
+had hardened while he slept.
+
+He sat there stunned until Hooky began licking at his scuffed fingers.
+He shouldered the dog away, and dug his hands into the sand-pile to stop
+the bleeding. Hooky licked at his face, panting love.
+
+"Get away!" he croaked savagely.
+
+The dog whined softly, trotted a short distance away, circled, and came
+back to crouch down in the sand directly before Hogey, inching forward
+experimentally.
+
+Hogey gripped fistfuls of the dry sand and cursed between his teeth,
+while his eyes wandered over the sky. They came to rest on the sliver of
+light--the space station--rising in the west, floating out in Big
+Bottomless where the gang was--Nichols and Guerrera and Lavrenti and
+Fats. And he wasn't forgetting Keesey, the rookie who'd replaced him.
+
+Keesey would have a rough time for a while--rough as a cob. The pit was
+no playground. The first time you went out of the station in a suit, the
+pit got you. Everything was falling, and you fell, with it. Everything.
+The skeletons of steel, the tire-shaped station, the spheres and docks
+and nightmare shapes--all tied together by umbilical cables and flexible
+tubes. Like some crazy sea-thing they seemed, floating in a black ocean
+with its tentacles bound together by drifting strands in the dark tide
+that bore it.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+Everything was pain-bright or dead black, and it wheeled around you, and
+you went nuts trying to figure which way was down. In fact, it took you
+months to teach your body that _all_ ways were down and that the pit was
+bottomless.
+
+He became conscious of a plaintive sound in the wind, and froze to
+listen.
+
+It was a baby crying.
+
+It was nearly a minute before he got the significance of it. It hit him
+where he lived, and he began jerking frantically at his encased feet and
+sobbing low in his throat. They'd hear him if he kept that up. He
+stopped and covered his ears to close out the cry of his firstborn. A
+light went on in the house, and when it went off again, the infant's cry
+had ceased.
+
+Another rocket went up from the station, and he cursed it. Space was a
+disease, and he had it.
+
+"Help!" he cried out suddenly. "I'm stuck! Help me, help me!"
+
+He knew he was yelling hysterically at the sky and fighting the
+relentless concrete that clutched his feet, and after a moment he
+stopped.
+
+The light was on in the house again, and he heard faint sounds. The
+stirring-about woke the baby again, and once more the infant's wail came
+on the breeze.
+
+_Make the kid shut up, make the kid shut up ..._
+
+But that was no good. It wasn't the kid's fault. It wasn't Marie's
+fault. No fathers allowed in space, they said, but it wasn't their fault
+either. They were right, and he had only himself to blame. The kid was
+an accident, but that didn't change anything. Not a thing in the world.
+It remained a tragedy.
+
+A tumbler had no business with a family, but what was a man going to do?
+Take a skinning knife, boy, and make yourself a eunuch. But that was no
+good either. They needed bulls out there in the pit, not steers. And
+when a man came down from a year's hitch, what was he going to do? Live
+in a lonely shack and read books for kicks? Because you were a man, you
+sought out a woman. And because she was a woman, she got a kid, and that
+was the end of it. It was nobody's fault, nobody's at all.
+
+He stared at the red eye of Mars low in the southwest. They were running
+out there now, and next year he would have been on the long long run ...
+
+But there was no use thinking about it. Next year and the years after
+belonged to _little_ Hogey.
+
+He sat there with his feet locked in the solid concrete of the footing,
+staring out into Big Bottomless while his son's cry came from the house
+and the Hauptman menfolk came wading through the tall grass in search of
+someone who had cried out. His feet were stuck tight, and he wouldn't
+ever get them out. He was sobbing softly when they found him.
+
+
+
+
+Transcriber's Note:
+
+ This etext was produced from _Fantastic Universe_ September 1955.
+ Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S.
+ copyright on this publication was renewed. Minor spelling and
+ typographical errors have been corrected without note.
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Hoofer, by Walter M. Miller
+
+*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE HOOFER ***
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