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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/29170-h.zip b/29170-h.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..98f10e1 --- /dev/null +++ b/29170-h.zip diff --git a/29170-h/29170-h.htm b/29170-h/29170-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..dc1caf2 --- /dev/null +++ b/29170-h/29170-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,1269 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" + "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> + +<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> + <head> + <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=iso-8859-1" /> + <meta http-equiv="Content-Style-Type" content="text/css" /> + <title> + The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Hoofer, by Walter M. Miller, Jr. + </title> + <style type="text/css"> + + p {margin-top: .75em; text-align: justify; margin-bottom: .75em;} + h1,h2 {text-align: right; font-weight: normal; line-height: 2em;} + body {margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%;} + .trn {border: solid 1px; margin: 3em 15%; padding: 1em; text-align: justify;} + .smcap {font-variant: small-caps;} + .bk1 {margin: 1em auto 3em; border-top: solid 2px; border-bottom: solid 2px;} + .bk2 {float: left; width: 15em; margin: 1em 2em 1em 0;} + .pr1 {line-height: 1.5em; margin-top: 4em;} + hr {width: 45%; margin: 1em auto; visibility: hidden;} + p.cap:first-letter {float: left; margin-right: .05em; padding-top: .05em; font-size: 300%; line-height: .8em; width: auto;} + + </style> + </head> +<body> + + +<pre> + +The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Hoofer, by Walter M. Miller + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Hoofer + +Author: Walter M. Miller + +Release Date: June 19, 2009 [EBook #29170] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE HOOFER *** + + + + +Produced by Greg Weeks, Stephen Blundell and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + + + + + +</pre> + + +<div class="bk1"><p><i><small>A wayfarer's return from a far country to his wife and family may be a +shining experience, a kind of second honeymoon. Or it may be so shadowed +by Time's relentless tyranny that the changes which have occurred in his +absence can lead only to tragedy and despair. This rarely discerning, warmly +human story by a brilliant newcomer to the science fantasy field is told +with no pulling of punches, and its adroit unfolding will astound you.</small></i></p></div> + +<div class="bk2"><h1><b>the<br /> +hoofer</b></h1> + +<h2><small><i>by ... Walter M. Miller, Jr.</i></small></h2> + +<p class="pr1"><big><b>A space rover has no business with a family. But what can a man +in the full vigor of youth do—if his heart cries out for a home?</b></big></p></div> + +<p class="cap"><span class="smcap">They all</span> knew he was a spacer +because of the white goggle marks +on his sun-scorched face, and so +they tolerated him and helped him. +They even made allowances for him +when he staggered and fell in the +aisle of the bus while pursuing the +harassed little housewife from seat +to seat and cajoling her to sit and +talk with him.</p> + +<p>Having fallen, he decided to +sleep in the aisle. Two men helped +him to the back of the bus, dumped +him on the rear seat, and tucked his +gin bottle safely out of sight. After +all, he had not seen Earth for nine +months, and judging by the crusted +matter about his eyelids, he couldn't +have seen it too well now, even if +he had been sober. Glare-blindness, +gravity-legs, and agoraphobia were +excuses for a lot of things, when a +man was just back from Big Bottomless. +And who could blame a +man for acting strangely?</p> + +<p>Minutes later, he was back up the +aisle and swaying giddily over the +little housewife. "How!" he said. +"Me Chief Broken Wing. You +wanta Indian wrestle?"</p> + +<p>The girl, who sat nervously staring +at him, smiled wanly, and +shook her head.</p> + +<p>"Quiet li'l pigeon, aren'tcha?" he +burbled affectionately, crashing into +the seat beside her.</p> + +<p>The two men slid out of their +seats, and a hand clamped his shoulder. +"Come on, Broken Wing, let's +go back to bed."</p> + +<p>"My name's Hogey," he said. +"Big Hogey Parker. I was just kidding +about being a Indian."</p> + +<p>"Yeah. Come on, let's go have a +drink." They got him on his feet, +and led him stumbling back down +the aisle.</p> + +<p>"My ma was half Cherokee, see? +That's how come I said it. You +wanta hear a war whoop? Real +stuff."</p> + +<p>"Never mind."</p> + +<p>He cupped his hands to his +mouth and favored them with a +blood-curdling proof of his ancestry, +while the female passengers +stirred restlessly and hunched in +their seats. The driver stopped the +bus and went back to warn him +against any further display. The +driver flashed a deputy's badge and +threatened to turn him over to a +constable.</p> + +<p>"I gotta get home," Big Hogey +told him. "I got me a son now, +that's why. You know? A little +baby pigeon of a son. Haven't seen +him yet."</p> + +<p>"Will you just sit still and be +quiet then, eh?"</p> + +<p>Big Hogey nodded emphatically. +"Shorry, officer, I didn't mean to +make any trouble."</p> + +<p>When the bus started again, he +fell on his side and lay still. He +made retching sounds for a time, +then rested, snoring softly. The bus +driver woke him again at Caine's +junction, retrieved his gin bottle +from behind the seat, and helped +him down the aisle and out of the +bus.</p> + +<p>Big Hogey stumbled about for a +moment, then sat down hard in the +gravel at the shoulder of the road. +The driver paused with one foot on +the step, looking around. There was +not even a store at the road junction, +but only a freight building +next to the railroad track, a couple +of farmhouses at the edge of a side-road, +and, just across the way, a deserted +filling station with a sagging +roof. The land was Great Plains +country, treeless, barren, and rolling.</p> + +<p>Big Hogey got up and staggered +around in front of the bus, clutching +at it for support, losing his +duffle bag.</p> + +<p>"Hey, watch the traffic!" The +driver warned. With a surge of unwelcome +compassion he trotted +around after his troublesome passenger, +taking his arm as he sagged +again. "You crossing?"</p> + +<p>"Yah," Hogey muttered. "Lemme +alone, I'm okay."</p> + +<p>The driver started across the +highway with him. The traffic was +sparse, but fast and dangerous in +the central ninety-mile lane.</p> + +<p>"I'm okay," Hogey kept protesting. +"I'm a tumbler, ya know? +Gravity's got me. Damn gravity. +I'm not used to gravity, ya know? I +used to be a tumbler—<i>huk!</i>—only +now I gotta be a hoofer. 'Count +of li'l Hogey. You know about li'l +Hogey?"</p> + +<p>"Yeah. Your son. Come on."</p> + +<p>"Say, you gotta son? I bet you +gotta son."</p> + +<p>"Two kids," said the driver, +catching Hogey's bag as it slipped +from his shoulder. "Both girls."</p> + +<p>"Say, you oughta be home with +them kids. Man oughta stick with +his family. You oughta get another +job." Hogey eyed him owlishly, +waggled a moralistic finger, skidded +on the gravel as they stepped +onto the opposite shoulder, and +sprawled again.</p> + +<p>The driver blew a weary breath, +looked down at him, and shook his +head. Maybe it'd be kinder to find +a constable after all. This guy could +get himself killed, wandering +around loose.</p> + +<p>"Somebody supposed to meet +you?" he asked, squinting around +at the dusty hills.</p> + +<p>"<i>Huk!</i>—who, me?" Hogey giggled, +belched, and shook his head. +"Nope. Nobody knows I'm coming. +S'prise. I'm supposed to be here a +week ago." He looked up at the +driver with a pained expression. +"Week late, ya know? Marie's +gonna be sore—woo-<i>hoo</i>!—is she +gonna be sore!" He waggled his +head severely at the ground.</p> + +<p>"Which way are you going?" the +driver grunted impatiently.</p> + +<p>Hogey pointed down the side-road +that led back into the hills. +"Marie's pop's place. You know +where? 'Bout three miles from +here. Gotta walk, I guess."</p> + +<p>"Don't," the driver warned. +"You sit there by the culvert till +you get a ride. Okay?"</p> + +<p>Hogey nodded forlornly.</p> + +<p>"Now stay out of the road," the +driver warned, then hurried back +across the highway. Moments later, +the atomic battery-driven motors +droned mournfully, and the bus +pulled away.</p> + +<p>Big Hogey blinked after it, rubbing +the back of his neck. "Nice +people," he said. "Nice buncha people. +All hoofers."</p> + +<p>With a grunt and a lurch, he got +to his feet, but his legs wouldn't +work right. With his tumbler's reflexes, +he fought to right himself +with frantic arm motions, but gravity +claimed him, and he went stumbling +into the ditch.</p> + +<p>"Damn legs, damn crazy legs!" +he cried.</p> + +<p>The bottom of the ditch was wet, +and he crawled up the embankment +with mud-soaked knees, and sat on +the shoulder again. The gin bottle +was still intact. He had himself a +long fiery drink, and it warmed him +deep down. He blinked around at +the gaunt and treeless land.</p> + +<p>The sun was almost down, forge-red +on a dusty horizon. The blood-streaked +sky faded into sulphurous +yellow toward the zenith, and the +very air that hung over the land +seemed full of yellow smoke, the +omnipresent dust of the plains.</p> + +<p>A farm truck turned onto the +side-road and moaned away, its +driver hardly glancing at the dark +young man who sat swaying on his +duffle bag near the culvert. Hogey +scarcely noticed the vehicle. He just +kept staring at the crazy sun.</p> + +<p>He shook his head. It wasn't really +the sun. The sun, the real sun, +was a hateful eye-sizzling horror in +the dead black pit. It painted everything +with pure white pain, and you +saw things by the reflected pain-light. +The fat red sun was strictly a +phoney, and it didn't fool him any. +He hated it for what he knew it was +behind the gory mask, and for what +it had done to his eyes.</p> + +<hr /> + +<p>With a grunt, he got to his feet, +managed to shoulder the duffle bag, +and started off down the middle of +the farm road, lurching from side +to side, and keeping his eyes on the +rolling distances. Another car turned +onto the side-road, honking angrily.</p> + +<p>Hogey tried to turn around to +look at it, but he forgot to shift his +footing. He staggered and went +down on the pavement. The car's +tires screeched on the hot asphalt. +Hogey lay there for a moment, +groaning. That one had hurt his +hip. A car door slammed and a big +man with a florid face got out and +stalked toward him, looking angry.</p> + +<p>"What the hell's the matter with +you, fella?" he drawled. "You +soused? Man, you've really got a +load."</p> + +<p>Hogey got up doggedly, shaking +his head to clear it. "Space legs," he +prevaricated. "Got space legs. Can't +stand the gravity."</p> + +<p>The burly farmer retrieved his +gin bottle for him, still miraculously +unbroken. "Here's your gravity," +he grunted. "Listen, fella, you better +get home pronto."</p> + +<p>"Pronto? Hey, I'm no Mex. Honest, +I'm just space burned. You +know?"</p> + +<p>"Yeah. Say, who are you, anyway? +Do you live around here?"</p> + +<p>It was obvious that the big man +had taken him for a hobo or a +tramp. Hogey pulled himself together. +"Goin' to the Hauptman's +place. Marie. You know Marie?"</p> + +<p>The farmer's eyebrows went up. +"Marie Hauptman? Sure I know +her. Only she's Marie Parker now. +Has been, nigh on six years. Say—" +He paused, then gaped. "You ain't +her husband by any chance?"</p> + +<p>"Hogey, that's me. Big Hogey +Parker."</p> + +<p>"Well, I'll be—! Get in the car. +I'm going right past John Hauptman's +place. Boy, you're in no +shape to walk it."</p> + +<p>He grinned wryly, waggled his +head, and helped Hogey and his +bag into the back seat. A woman +with a sun-wrinkled neck sat rigidly +beside the farmer in the front, +and she neither greeted the passenger +nor looked around.</p> + +<p>"They don't make cars like this +anymore," the farmer called over +the growl of the ancient gasoline +engine and the grind of gears. +"You can have them new atomics +with their loads of hot isotopes +under the seat. Ain't safe, I say—eh, +Martha?"</p> + +<p>The woman with the sun-baked +neck quivered her head slightly. +"A car like this was good enough +for Pa, an' I reckon it's good +enough for us," she drawled mournfully.</p> + +<p>Five minutes later the car drew +in to the side of the road. "Reckon +you can walk it from here," the +farmer said. "That's Hauptman's +road just up ahead."</p> + +<p>He helped Hogey out of the car +and drove away without looking +back to see if Hogey stayed on his +feet. The woman with the sun-baked +neck was suddenly talking +garrulously in his direction.</p> + +<p>It was twilight. The sun had set, +and the yellow sky was turning +gray. Hogey was too tired to go on, +and his legs would no longer hold +him. He blinked around at the land, +got his eyes focused, and found +what looked like Hauptman's place +on a distant hillside. It was a big +frame house surrounded by a wheatfield, +and a few scrawny trees. Having +located it, he stretched out in +the tall grass beyond the ditch to +take a little rest.</p> + +<p>Somewhere dogs were barking, +and a cricket sang creaking monotony +in the grass. Once there was the +distant thunder of a rocket blast +from the launching station six miles +to the west, but it faded quickly. An +A-motored convertible whined past +on the road, but Hogey went unseen.</p> + +<p>When he awoke, it was night, +and he was shivering. His stomach +was screeching, and his nerves dancing +with high voltages. He sat up +and groped for his watch, then remembered +he had pawned it after +the poker game. Remembering the +game and the results of the game +made him wince and bite his lip +and grope for the bottle again.</p> + +<p>He sat breathing heavily for a +moment after the stiff drink. Equating +time to position had become +second nature with him, but he had +to think for a moment because his +defective vision prevented him from +seeing the Earth-crescent.</p> + +<p>Vega was almost straight above +him in the late August sky, so he +knew it wasn't much after sundown—probably +about eight o'clock. He +braced himself with another swallow +of gin, picked himself up and +got back to the road, feeling a little +sobered after the nap.</p> + +<p>He limped on up the pavement +and turned left at the narrow drive +that led between barbed-wire fences +toward the Hauptman farmhouse, +five hundred yards or so from the +farm road. The fields on his left +belonged to Marie's father, he +knew. He was getting close—close +to home and woman and child.</p> + +<p>He dropped the bag suddenly +and leaned against a fence post, +rolling his head on his forearms +and choking in spasms of air. He +was shaking all over, and his belly +writhed. He wanted to turn and +run. He wanted to crawl out in the +grass and hide.</p> + +<p>What were they going to say? +And Marie, Marie most of all. +How was he going to tell her about +the money?</p> + +<p>Six hitches in space, and every +time the promise had been the +same: <i>One more tour, baby, and +we'll have enough dough, and then +I'll quit for good. One more time, +and we'll have our stake—enough +to open a little business, or buy a +house with a mortgage and get a +job.</i></p> + +<p>And she had waited, but the +money had never been quite enough +until this time. This time the tour +had lasted nine months, and he had +signed on for every run from station +to moon-base to pick up the +bonuses. And this time he'd made +it. Two weeks ago, there had been +forty-eight hundred in the bank. +And now ...</p> + +<p>"<i>Why?</i>" he groaned, striking his +forehead against his forearms. His +arm slipped, and his head hit the +top of the fencepost, and the pain +blinded him for a moment. He staggered +back into the road with a +low roar, wiped blood from his +forehead, and savagely kicked his +bag.</p> + +<p>It rolled a couple of yards up the +road. He leaped after it and kicked +it again. When he had finished +with it, he stood panting and angry, +but feeling better. He shouldered +the bag and hiked on toward the +farmhouse.</p> + +<p>They're hoofers, that's all—just +an Earth-chained bunch of hoofers, +even Marie. And I'm a tumbler. A +born tumbler. Know what that +means? It means—God, what does +it mean? It means out in Big Bottomless, +where Earth's like a fat +moon with fuzzy mold growing on +it. Mold, that's all you are, just +mold.</p> + +<p>A dog barked, and he wondered +if he had been muttering aloud. He +came to a fence-gap and paused in +the darkness. The road wound +around and came up the hill in +front of the house. Maybe they were +sitting on the porch. Maybe they'd +already heard him coming. Maybe ...</p> + +<p>He was trembling again. He +fished the fifth of gin out of his +coat pocket and sloshed it. Still over +half a pint. He decided to kill it. It +wouldn't do to go home with a +bottle sticking out of his pocket. +He stood there in the night wind, +sipping at it, and watching the reddish +moon come up in the east. The +moon looked as phoney as the +setting sun.</p> + +<p>He straightened in sudden determination. +It had to be sometime. +Get it over with, get it over with +now. He opened the fence-gap, slipped +through, and closed it firmly +behind him. He retrieved his bag, +and waded quietly through the tall +grass until he reached the hedge +which divided an area of sickly +peach trees from the field. He got +over the hedge somehow, and started +through the trees toward the +house. He stumbled over some old +boards, and they clattered.</p> + +<p>"<i>Shhh!</i>" he hissed, and moved +on.</p> + +<p>The dogs were barking angrily, +and he heard a screen door slam. +He stopped.</p> + +<p>"Ho there!" a male voice called +experimentally from the house.</p> + +<p>One of Marie's brothers. Hogey +stood frozen in the shadow of a +peach tree, waiting.</p> + +<p>"Anybody out there?" the man +called again.</p> + +<p>Hogey waited, then heard the +man muttering, "Sic 'im, boy, sic +'im."</p> + +<p>The hound's bark became eager. +The animal came chasing down the +slope, and stopped ten feet away to +crouch and bark frantically at the +shadow in the gloom. He knew the +dog.</p> + +<p>"Hooky!" he whispered. "Hooky +boy—here!"</p> + +<p>The dog stopped barking, sniffed, +trotted closer, and went +"<i>Rrrooff!</i>" Then he started sniffing +suspiciously again.</p> + +<p>"Easy, Hooky, here boy!" he +whispered.</p> + +<p>The dog came forward silently, +sniffed his hand, and whined in +recognition. Then he trotted around +Hogey, panting doggy affection and +dancing an invitation to romp. The +man whistled from the porch. The +dog froze, then trotted quickly back +up the slope.</p> + +<p>"Nothing, eh, Hooky?" the +man on the porch said. "Chasin' +armadillos again, eh?"</p> + +<p>The screen door slammed again, +and the porch light went out. +Hogey stood there staring, unable +to think. Somewhere beyond the +window lights were—his woman, +his son.</p> + +<p>What the hell was a tumbler doing +with a woman and a son?</p> + +<p>After perhaps a minute, he stepped +forward again. He tripped over +a shovel, and his foot plunged into +something that went <i>squelch</i> and +swallowed the foot past the ankle. +He fell forward into a heap of +sand, and his foot went deeper into +the sloppy wetness.</p> + +<p>He lay there with his stinging +forehead on his arms, cursing softly +and crying. Finally he rolled +over, pulled his foot out of the +mess, and took off his shoes. They +were full of mud—sticky sandy +mud.</p> + +<p>The dark world was reeling +about him, and the wind was dragging +at his breath. He fell back +against the sand pile and let his +feet sink in the mud hole and wriggled +his toes. He was laughing +soundlessly, and his face was wet +in the wind. He couldn't think. He +couldn't remember where he was +and why, and he stopped caring, +and after a while he felt better.</p> + +<p>The stars were swimming over +him, dancing crazily, and the mud +cooled his feet, and the sand was +soft behind him. He saw a rocket +go up on a tail of flame from the +station, and waited for the sound of +its blast, but he was already asleep +when it came.</p> + +<p>It was far past midnight when he +became conscious of the dog licking +wetly at his ear and cheek. He +pushed the animal away with a low +curse and mopped at the side of his +face. He stirred, and groaned. His +feet were burning up! He tried to +pull them toward him, but they +wouldn't budge. There was something +wrong with his legs.</p> + +<p>For an instant he stared wildly +around in the night. Then he remembered +where he was, closed his +eyes and shuddered. When he +opened them again, the moon had +emerged from behind a cloud, and +he could see clearly the cruel trap +into which he had accidentally +stumbled. A pile of old boards, a +careful stack of new lumber, a +pick and shovel, a sand-pile, heaps +of fresh-turned earth, and a concrete +mixer—well, it added up.</p> + +<p>He gripped his ankles and pulled, +but his feet wouldn't budge. In +sudden terror, he tried to stand up, +but his ankles were clutched by the +concrete too, and he fell back in +the sand with a low moan. He lay +still for several minutes, considering +carefully.</p> + +<p>He pulled at his left foot. It was +locked in a vise. He tugged even +more desperately at his right foot. +It was equally immovable.</p> + +<p>He sat up with a whimper and +clawed at the rough concrete until +his nails tore and his fingertips +bled. The surface still felt damp, +but it had hardened while he slept.</p> + +<p>He sat there stunned until Hooky +began licking at his scuffed fingers. +He shouldered the dog away, and +dug his hands into the sand-pile to +stop the bleeding. Hooky licked at +his face, panting love.</p> + +<p>"Get away!" he croaked savagely.</p> + +<p>The dog whined softly, trotted +a short distance away, circled, and +came back to crouch down in the +sand directly before Hogey, inching +forward experimentally.</p> + +<p>Hogey gripped fistfuls of the dry +sand and cursed between his teeth, +while his eyes wandered over the +sky. They came to rest on the sliver +of light—the space station—rising +in the west, floating out in Big Bottomless +where the gang was—Nichols +and Guerrera and Lavrenti +and Fats. And he wasn't forgetting +Keesey, the rookie who'd replaced +him.</p> + +<p>Keesey would have a rough time +for a while—rough as a cob. The pit +was no playground. The first time +you went out of the station in a +suit, the pit got you. Everything +was falling, and you fell, with it. +Everything. The skeletons of steel, +the tire-shaped station, the spheres +and docks and nightmare shapes—all +tied together by umbilical cables +and flexible tubes. Like some crazy +sea-thing they seemed, floating in a +black ocean with its tentacles bound +together by drifting strands in the +dark tide that bore it.</p> + +<hr /> + +<p>Everything was pain-bright or +dead black, and it wheeled around +you, and you went nuts trying to +figure which way was down. In fact, +it took you months to teach your +body that <i>all</i> ways were down and +that the pit was bottomless.</p> + +<p>He became conscious of a plaintive +sound in the wind, and froze to +listen.</p> + +<p>It was a baby crying.</p> + +<p>It was nearly a minute before he +got the significance of it. It hit him +where he lived, and he began jerking +frantically at his encased feet +and sobbing low in his throat. +They'd hear him if he kept that up. +He stopped and covered his ears to +close out the cry of his firstborn. A +light went on in the house, and +when it went off again, the infant's +cry had ceased.</p> + +<p>Another rocket went up from the +station, and he cursed it. Space was +a disease, and he had it.</p> + +<p>"Help!" he cried out suddenly. +"I'm stuck! Help me, help me!"</p> + +<p>He knew he was yelling hysterically +at the sky and fighting the relentless +concrete that clutched his +feet, and after a moment he stopped.</p> + +<p>The light was on in the house +again, and he heard faint sounds. +The stirring-about woke the baby +again, and once more the infant's +wail came on the breeze.</p> + +<p><i>Make the kid shut up, make the +kid shut up ...</i></p> + +<p>But that was no good. It wasn't +the kid's fault. It wasn't Marie's +fault. No fathers allowed in space, +they said, but it wasn't their fault +either. They were right, and he had +only himself to blame. The kid was +an accident, but that didn't change +anything. Not a thing in the world. +It remained a tragedy.</p> + +<p>A tumbler had no business with a +family, but what was a man going +to do? Take a skinning knife, boy, +and make yourself a eunuch. But +that was no good either. They needed +bulls out there in the pit, not +steers. And when a man came down +from a year's hitch, what was he +going to do? Live in a lonely shack +and read books for kicks? Because +you were a man, you sought out a +woman. And because she was a +woman, she got a kid, and that was +the end of it. It was nobody's fault, +nobody's at all.</p> + +<p>He stared at the red eye of Mars +low in the southwest. They were +running out there now, and next +year he would have been on the +long long run ...</p> + +<p>But there was no use thinking +about it. Next year and the years +after belonged to <i>little</i> Hogey.</p> + +<p>He sat there with his feet locked +in the solid concrete of the footing, +staring out into Big Bottomless +while his son's cry came from the +house and the Hauptman menfolk +came wading through the tall grass +in search of someone who had cried +out. His feet were stuck tight, and +he wouldn't ever get them out. He +was sobbing softly when they found +him.</p> + +<div class="trn"><b>Transcriber's Note:</b> +This etext was produced from <i>Fantastic Universe</i> September 1955. +Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. +copyright on this publication was renewed. Minor spelling and +typographical errors have been corrected without note.</div> + + + + + + + + +<pre> + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Hoofer, by Walter M. 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Miller + +Release Date: June 19, 2009 [EBook #29170] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE HOOFER *** + + + + +Produced by Greg Weeks, Stephen Blundell and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + + + + + + + + + _A wayfarer's return from a far country to his wife and family may + be a shining experience, a kind of second honeymoon. Or it may be so + shadowed by Time's relentless tyranny that the changes which have + occurred in his absence can lead only to tragedy and despair. This + rarely discerning, warmly human story by a brilliant newcomer to the + science fantasy field is told with no pulling of punches, and its + adroit unfolding will astound you._ + + + the + hoofer + + _by ... Walter M. Miller, Jr._ + + + A space rover has no business with a family. But what can a man + in the full vigor of youth do--if his heart cries out for a home? + + +They all knew he was a spacer because of the white goggle marks on his +sun-scorched face, and so they tolerated him and helped him. They even +made allowances for him when he staggered and fell in the aisle of the +bus while pursuing the harassed little housewife from seat to seat and +cajoling her to sit and talk with him. + +Having fallen, he decided to sleep in the aisle. Two men helped him to +the back of the bus, dumped him on the rear seat, and tucked his gin +bottle safely out of sight. After all, he had not seen Earth for nine +months, and judging by the crusted matter about his eyelids, he couldn't +have seen it too well now, even if he had been sober. Glare-blindness, +gravity-legs, and agoraphobia were excuses for a lot of things, when a +man was just back from Big Bottomless. And who could blame a man for +acting strangely? + +Minutes later, he was back up the aisle and swaying giddily over the +little housewife. "How!" he said. "Me Chief Broken Wing. You wanta +Indian wrestle?" + +The girl, who sat nervously staring at him, smiled wanly, and shook her +head. + +"Quiet li'l pigeon, aren'tcha?" he burbled affectionately, crashing into +the seat beside her. + +The two men slid out of their seats, and a hand clamped his shoulder. +"Come on, Broken Wing, let's go back to bed." + +"My name's Hogey," he said. "Big Hogey Parker. I was just kidding about +being a Indian." + +"Yeah. Come on, let's go have a drink." They got him on his feet, and +led him stumbling back down the aisle. + +"My ma was half Cherokee, see? That's how come I said it. You wanta hear +a war whoop? Real stuff." + +"Never mind." + +He cupped his hands to his mouth and favored them with a blood-curdling +proof of his ancestry, while the female passengers stirred restlessly +and hunched in their seats. The driver stopped the bus and went back to +warn him against any further display. The driver flashed a deputy's +badge and threatened to turn him over to a constable. + +"I gotta get home," Big Hogey told him. "I got me a son now, that's why. +You know? A little baby pigeon of a son. Haven't seen him yet." + +"Will you just sit still and be quiet then, eh?" + +Big Hogey nodded emphatically. "Shorry, officer, I didn't mean to make +any trouble." + +When the bus started again, he fell on his side and lay still. He made +retching sounds for a time, then rested, snoring softly. The bus driver +woke him again at Caine's junction, retrieved his gin bottle from behind +the seat, and helped him down the aisle and out of the bus. + +Big Hogey stumbled about for a moment, then sat down hard in the gravel +at the shoulder of the road. The driver paused with one foot on the +step, looking around. There was not even a store at the road junction, +but only a freight building next to the railroad track, a couple of +farmhouses at the edge of a side-road, and, just across the way, a +deserted filling station with a sagging roof. The land was Great Plains +country, treeless, barren, and rolling. + +Big Hogey got up and staggered around in front of the bus, clutching at +it for support, losing his duffle bag. + +"Hey, watch the traffic!" The driver warned. With a surge of unwelcome +compassion he trotted around after his troublesome passenger, taking his +arm as he sagged again. "You crossing?" + +"Yah," Hogey muttered. "Lemme alone, I'm okay." + +The driver started across the highway with him. The traffic was sparse, +but fast and dangerous in the central ninety-mile lane. + +"I'm okay," Hogey kept protesting. "I'm a tumbler, ya know? Gravity's +got me. Damn gravity. I'm not used to gravity, ya know? I used to be a +tumbler--_huk!_--only now I gotta be a hoofer. 'Count of li'l Hogey. You +know about li'l Hogey?" + +"Yeah. Your son. Come on." + +"Say, you gotta son? I bet you gotta son." + +"Two kids," said the driver, catching Hogey's bag as it slipped from his +shoulder. "Both girls." + +"Say, you oughta be home with them kids. Man oughta stick with his +family. You oughta get another job." Hogey eyed him owlishly, waggled a +moralistic finger, skidded on the gravel as they stepped onto the +opposite shoulder, and sprawled again. + +The driver blew a weary breath, looked down at him, and shook his head. +Maybe it'd be kinder to find a constable after all. This guy could get +himself killed, wandering around loose. + +"Somebody supposed to meet you?" he asked, squinting around at the dusty +hills. + +"_Huk!_--who, me?" Hogey giggled, belched, and shook his head. "Nope. +Nobody knows I'm coming. S'prise. I'm supposed to be here a week ago." +He looked up at the driver with a pained expression. "Week late, ya +know? Marie's gonna be sore--woo-_hoo_!--is she gonna be sore!" He +waggled his head severely at the ground. + +"Which way are you going?" the driver grunted impatiently. + +Hogey pointed down the side-road that led back into the hills. "Marie's +pop's place. You know where? 'Bout three miles from here. Gotta walk, I +guess." + +"Don't," the driver warned. "You sit there by the culvert till you get a +ride. Okay?" + +Hogey nodded forlornly. + +"Now stay out of the road," the driver warned, then hurried back across +the highway. Moments later, the atomic battery-driven motors droned +mournfully, and the bus pulled away. + +Big Hogey blinked after it, rubbing the back of his neck. "Nice people," +he said. "Nice buncha people. All hoofers." + +With a grunt and a lurch, he got to his feet, but his legs wouldn't work +right. With his tumbler's reflexes, he fought to right himself with +frantic arm motions, but gravity claimed him, and he went stumbling into +the ditch. + +"Damn legs, damn crazy legs!" he cried. + +The bottom of the ditch was wet, and he crawled up the embankment with +mud-soaked knees, and sat on the shoulder again. The gin bottle was +still intact. He had himself a long fiery drink, and it warmed him deep +down. He blinked around at the gaunt and treeless land. + +The sun was almost down, forge-red on a dusty horizon. The +blood-streaked sky faded into sulphurous yellow toward the zenith, and +the very air that hung over the land seemed full of yellow smoke, the +omnipresent dust of the plains. + +A farm truck turned onto the side-road and moaned away, its driver +hardly glancing at the dark young man who sat swaying on his duffle bag +near the culvert. Hogey scarcely noticed the vehicle. He just kept +staring at the crazy sun. + +He shook his head. It wasn't really the sun. The sun, the real sun, was +a hateful eye-sizzling horror in the dead black pit. It painted +everything with pure white pain, and you saw things by the reflected +pain-light. The fat red sun was strictly a phoney, and it didn't fool +him any. He hated it for what he knew it was behind the gory mask, and +for what it had done to his eyes. + + * * * * * + +With a grunt, he got to his feet, managed to shoulder the duffle bag, +and started off down the middle of the farm road, lurching from side to +side, and keeping his eyes on the rolling distances. Another car turned +onto the side-road, honking angrily. + +Hogey tried to turn around to look at it, but he forgot to shift his +footing. He staggered and went down on the pavement. The car's tires +screeched on the hot asphalt. Hogey lay there for a moment, groaning. +That one had hurt his hip. A car door slammed and a big man with a +florid face got out and stalked toward him, looking angry. + +"What the hell's the matter with you, fella?" he drawled. "You soused? +Man, you've really got a load." + +Hogey got up doggedly, shaking his head to clear it. "Space legs," he +prevaricated. "Got space legs. Can't stand the gravity." + +The burly farmer retrieved his gin bottle for him, still miraculously +unbroken. "Here's your gravity," he grunted. "Listen, fella, you better +get home pronto." + +"Pronto? Hey, I'm no Mex. Honest, I'm just space burned. You know?" + +"Yeah. Say, who are you, anyway? Do you live around here?" + +It was obvious that the big man had taken him for a hobo or a tramp. +Hogey pulled himself together. "Goin' to the Hauptman's place. Marie. +You know Marie?" + +The farmer's eyebrows went up. "Marie Hauptman? Sure I know her. Only +she's Marie Parker now. Has been, nigh on six years. Say--" He paused, +then gaped. "You ain't her husband by any chance?" + +"Hogey, that's me. Big Hogey Parker." + +"Well, I'll be--! Get in the car. I'm going right past John Hauptman's +place. Boy, you're in no shape to walk it." + +He grinned wryly, waggled his head, and helped Hogey and his bag into +the back seat. A woman with a sun-wrinkled neck sat rigidly beside the +farmer in the front, and she neither greeted the passenger nor looked +around. + +"They don't make cars like this anymore," the farmer called over the +growl of the ancient gasoline engine and the grind of gears. "You can +have them new atomics with their loads of hot isotopes under the seat. +Ain't safe, I say--eh, Martha?" + +The woman with the sun-baked neck quivered her head slightly. "A car +like this was good enough for Pa, an' I reckon it's good enough for us," +she drawled mournfully. + +Five minutes later the car drew in to the side of the road. "Reckon you +can walk it from here," the farmer said. "That's Hauptman's road just up +ahead." + +He helped Hogey out of the car and drove away without looking back to +see if Hogey stayed on his feet. The woman with the sun-baked neck was +suddenly talking garrulously in his direction. + +It was twilight. The sun had set, and the yellow sky was turning gray. +Hogey was too tired to go on, and his legs would no longer hold him. He +blinked around at the land, got his eyes focused, and found what looked +like Hauptman's place on a distant hillside. It was a big frame house +surrounded by a wheatfield, and a few scrawny trees. Having located it, +he stretched out in the tall grass beyond the ditch to take a little +rest. + +Somewhere dogs were barking, and a cricket sang creaking monotony in the +grass. Once there was the distant thunder of a rocket blast from the +launching station six miles to the west, but it faded quickly. An +A-motored convertible whined past on the road, but Hogey went unseen. + +When he awoke, it was night, and he was shivering. His stomach was +screeching, and his nerves dancing with high voltages. He sat up and +groped for his watch, then remembered he had pawned it after the poker +game. Remembering the game and the results of the game made him wince +and bite his lip and grope for the bottle again. + +He sat breathing heavily for a moment after the stiff drink. Equating +time to position had become second nature with him, but he had to think +for a moment because his defective vision prevented him from seeing the +Earth-crescent. + +Vega was almost straight above him in the late August sky, so he knew it +wasn't much after sundown--probably about eight o'clock. He braced +himself with another swallow of gin, picked himself up and got back to +the road, feeling a little sobered after the nap. + +He limped on up the pavement and turned left at the narrow drive that +led between barbed-wire fences toward the Hauptman farmhouse, five +hundred yards or so from the farm road. The fields on his left belonged +to Marie's father, he knew. He was getting close--close to home and +woman and child. + +He dropped the bag suddenly and leaned against a fence post, rolling his +head on his forearms and choking in spasms of air. He was shaking all +over, and his belly writhed. He wanted to turn and run. He wanted to +crawl out in the grass and hide. + +What were they going to say? And Marie, Marie most of all. How was he +going to tell her about the money? + +Six hitches in space, and every time the promise had been the same: _One +more tour, baby, and we'll have enough dough, and then I'll quit for +good. One more time, and we'll have our stake--enough to open a little +business, or buy a house with a mortgage and get a job._ + +And she had waited, but the money had never been quite enough until this +time. This time the tour had lasted nine months, and he had signed on +for every run from station to moon-base to pick up the bonuses. And this +time he'd made it. Two weeks ago, there had been forty-eight hundred in +the bank. And now ... + +"_Why?_" he groaned, striking his forehead against his forearms. His arm +slipped, and his head hit the top of the fencepost, and the pain blinded +him for a moment. He staggered back into the road with a low roar, wiped +blood from his forehead, and savagely kicked his bag. + +It rolled a couple of yards up the road. He leaped after it and kicked +it again. When he had finished with it, he stood panting and angry, but +feeling better. He shouldered the bag and hiked on toward the farmhouse. + +They're hoofers, that's all--just an Earth-chained bunch of hoofers, +even Marie. And I'm a tumbler. A born tumbler. Know what that means? It +means--God, what does it mean? It means out in Big Bottomless, where +Earth's like a fat moon with fuzzy mold growing on it. Mold, that's all +you are, just mold. + +A dog barked, and he wondered if he had been muttering aloud. He came to +a fence-gap and paused in the darkness. The road wound around and came +up the hill in front of the house. Maybe they were sitting on the porch. +Maybe they'd already heard him coming. Maybe ... + +He was trembling again. He fished the fifth of gin out of his coat +pocket and sloshed it. Still over half a pint. He decided to kill it. It +wouldn't do to go home with a bottle sticking out of his pocket. He +stood there in the night wind, sipping at it, and watching the reddish +moon come up in the east. The moon looked as phoney as the setting sun. + +He straightened in sudden determination. It had to be sometime. Get it +over with, get it over with now. He opened the fence-gap, slipped +through, and closed it firmly behind him. He retrieved his bag, and +waded quietly through the tall grass until he reached the hedge which +divided an area of sickly peach trees from the field. He got over the +hedge somehow, and started through the trees toward the house. He +stumbled over some old boards, and they clattered. + +"_Shhh!_" he hissed, and moved on. + +The dogs were barking angrily, and he heard a screen door slam. He +stopped. + +"Ho there!" a male voice called experimentally from the house. + +One of Marie's brothers. Hogey stood frozen in the shadow of a peach +tree, waiting. + +"Anybody out there?" the man called again. + +Hogey waited, then heard the man muttering, "Sic 'im, boy, sic 'im." + +The hound's bark became eager. The animal came chasing down the slope, +and stopped ten feet away to crouch and bark frantically at the shadow +in the gloom. He knew the dog. + +"Hooky!" he whispered. "Hooky boy--here!" + +The dog stopped barking, sniffed, trotted closer, and went "_Rrrooff!_" +Then he started sniffing suspiciously again. + +"Easy, Hooky, here boy!" he whispered. + +The dog came forward silently, sniffed his hand, and whined in +recognition. Then he trotted around Hogey, panting doggy affection and +dancing an invitation to romp. The man whistled from the porch. The dog +froze, then trotted quickly back up the slope. + +"Nothing, eh, Hooky?" the man on the porch said. "Chasin' armadillos +again, eh?" + +The screen door slammed again, and the porch light went out. Hogey stood +there staring, unable to think. Somewhere beyond the window lights +were--his woman, his son. + +What the hell was a tumbler doing with a woman and a son? + +After perhaps a minute, he stepped forward again. He tripped over a +shovel, and his foot plunged into something that went _squelch_ and +swallowed the foot past the ankle. He fell forward into a heap of sand, +and his foot went deeper into the sloppy wetness. + +He lay there with his stinging forehead on his arms, cursing softly and +crying. Finally he rolled over, pulled his foot out of the mess, and +took off his shoes. They were full of mud--sticky sandy mud. + +The dark world was reeling about him, and the wind was dragging at his +breath. He fell back against the sand pile and let his feet sink in the +mud hole and wriggled his toes. He was laughing soundlessly, and his +face was wet in the wind. He couldn't think. He couldn't remember where +he was and why, and he stopped caring, and after a while he felt better. + +The stars were swimming over him, dancing crazily, and the mud cooled +his feet, and the sand was soft behind him. He saw a rocket go up on a +tail of flame from the station, and waited for the sound of its blast, +but he was already asleep when it came. + +It was far past midnight when he became conscious of the dog licking +wetly at his ear and cheek. He pushed the animal away with a low curse +and mopped at the side of his face. He stirred, and groaned. His feet +were burning up! He tried to pull them toward him, but they wouldn't +budge. There was something wrong with his legs. + +For an instant he stared wildly around in the night. Then he remembered +where he was, closed his eyes and shuddered. When he opened them again, +the moon had emerged from behind a cloud, and he could see clearly the +cruel trap into which he had accidentally stumbled. A pile of old +boards, a careful stack of new lumber, a pick and shovel, a sand-pile, +heaps of fresh-turned earth, and a concrete mixer--well, it added up. + +He gripped his ankles and pulled, but his feet wouldn't budge. In sudden +terror, he tried to stand up, but his ankles were clutched by the +concrete too, and he fell back in the sand with a low moan. He lay still +for several minutes, considering carefully. + +He pulled at his left foot. It was locked in a vise. He tugged even more +desperately at his right foot. It was equally immovable. + +He sat up with a whimper and clawed at the rough concrete until his +nails tore and his fingertips bled. The surface still felt damp, but it +had hardened while he slept. + +He sat there stunned until Hooky began licking at his scuffed fingers. +He shouldered the dog away, and dug his hands into the sand-pile to stop +the bleeding. Hooky licked at his face, panting love. + +"Get away!" he croaked savagely. + +The dog whined softly, trotted a short distance away, circled, and came +back to crouch down in the sand directly before Hogey, inching forward +experimentally. + +Hogey gripped fistfuls of the dry sand and cursed between his teeth, +while his eyes wandered over the sky. They came to rest on the sliver of +light--the space station--rising in the west, floating out in Big +Bottomless where the gang was--Nichols and Guerrera and Lavrenti and +Fats. And he wasn't forgetting Keesey, the rookie who'd replaced him. + +Keesey would have a rough time for a while--rough as a cob. The pit was +no playground. The first time you went out of the station in a suit, the +pit got you. Everything was falling, and you fell, with it. Everything. +The skeletons of steel, the tire-shaped station, the spheres and docks +and nightmare shapes--all tied together by umbilical cables and flexible +tubes. Like some crazy sea-thing they seemed, floating in a black ocean +with its tentacles bound together by drifting strands in the dark tide +that bore it. + + * * * * * + +Everything was pain-bright or dead black, and it wheeled around you, and +you went nuts trying to figure which way was down. In fact, it took you +months to teach your body that _all_ ways were down and that the pit was +bottomless. + +He became conscious of a plaintive sound in the wind, and froze to +listen. + +It was a baby crying. + +It was nearly a minute before he got the significance of it. It hit him +where he lived, and he began jerking frantically at his encased feet and +sobbing low in his throat. They'd hear him if he kept that up. He +stopped and covered his ears to close out the cry of his firstborn. A +light went on in the house, and when it went off again, the infant's cry +had ceased. + +Another rocket went up from the station, and he cursed it. Space was a +disease, and he had it. + +"Help!" he cried out suddenly. "I'm stuck! Help me, help me!" + +He knew he was yelling hysterically at the sky and fighting the +relentless concrete that clutched his feet, and after a moment he +stopped. + +The light was on in the house again, and he heard faint sounds. The +stirring-about woke the baby again, and once more the infant's wail came +on the breeze. + +_Make the kid shut up, make the kid shut up ..._ + +But that was no good. It wasn't the kid's fault. It wasn't Marie's +fault. No fathers allowed in space, they said, but it wasn't their fault +either. They were right, and he had only himself to blame. The kid was +an accident, but that didn't change anything. Not a thing in the world. +It remained a tragedy. + +A tumbler had no business with a family, but what was a man going to do? +Take a skinning knife, boy, and make yourself a eunuch. But that was no +good either. They needed bulls out there in the pit, not steers. And +when a man came down from a year's hitch, what was he going to do? Live +in a lonely shack and read books for kicks? Because you were a man, you +sought out a woman. And because she was a woman, she got a kid, and that +was the end of it. It was nobody's fault, nobody's at all. + +He stared at the red eye of Mars low in the southwest. They were running +out there now, and next year he would have been on the long long run ... + +But there was no use thinking about it. Next year and the years after +belonged to _little_ Hogey. + +He sat there with his feet locked in the solid concrete of the footing, +staring out into Big Bottomless while his son's cry came from the house +and the Hauptman menfolk came wading through the tall grass in search of +someone who had cried out. His feet were stuck tight, and he wouldn't +ever get them out. He was sobbing softly when they found him. + + + + +Transcriber's Note: + + This etext was produced from _Fantastic Universe_ September 1955. + Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. + copyright on this publication was renewed. Minor spelling and + typographical errors have been corrected without note. + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Hoofer, by Walter M. 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