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diff --git a/old/ltman10.txt b/old/ltman10.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..e703464 --- /dev/null +++ b/old/ltman10.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1373 @@ +The Project Gutenberg Etext The Little Man, by John Galsworthy +#32 in our series by John Galsworthy + +Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check +the laws for your country before redistributing these files!!! + +Please take a look at the important information in this header. +We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an +electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. + +This should be the first thing seen when anyone opens the book. +Do not change or edit it without written permission. 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FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.07.00*END* + + + + + +This etext was prepared by David Widger, <widger@cecomet.net> + + + + + +FROM THE SERIES OF SIX SHORT PLAYS + +BY JOHN GALSWORTHY + + + + +THE LITTLE MAN + +A FARCICAL MORALITY IN THREE SCENES + + + + +CHARACTERS + +THE LITTLE MAN. +THE AMERICAN. +THE ENGLISHMAN. +THE ENGLISHWOMAN. +THE GERMAN. +THE DUTCH BOY. +THE MOTHER. +THE BABY. +THE WAITER. +THE STATION OFFICIAL. +THE POLICEMAN. +THE PORTER. + + + + + +SCENE I + + Afternoon, on the departure platform of an Austrian railway + station. At several little tables outside the buffet persons + are taking refreshment, served by a pale young waiter. On a + seat against the wall of the buffet a woman of lowly station is + sitting beside two large bundles, on one of which she has placed + her baby, swathed in a black shawl. + +WAITER. [Approaching a table whereat sit an English traveller and +his wife] Two coffee? + +ENGLISHMAN. [Paying] Thanks. [To his wife, in an Oxford voice] +Sugar? + +ENGLISHWOMAN. [In a Cambridge voice] One. + +AMERICAN TRAVELLER. [With field-glasses and a pocket camera from +another table] Waiter, I'd like to have you get my eggs. I've been +sitting here quite a while. + +WAITER. Yes, sare. + +GERMAN TRAVELLER. 'Kellner, bezahlen'! [His voice is, like his +moustache, stiff and brushed up at the ends. His figure also is +stiff and his hair a little grey; clearly once, if not now, a +colonel.] + +WAITER. 'Komm' gleich'! + + [The baby on the bundle wails. The mother takes it up to soothe + it. A young, red-cheecked Dutchman at the fourth table stops + eating and laughs.] + +AMERICAN. My eggs! Get a wiggle on you! + +WAITER. Yes, sare. [He rapidly recedes.] + + [A LITTLE MAN in a soft hat is seen to the right of tables. He + stands a moment looking after the hurrying waiter, then seats + himself at the fifth table.] + +ENGLISHMAN. [Looking at his watch] Ten minutes more. + +ENGLISHWOMAN. Bother! + +AMERICAN. [Addressing them] 'Pears as if they'd a prejudice against +eggs here, anyway. + + [The ENGLISH look at him, but do not speak. ] + +GERMAN. [In creditable English] In these places man can get +nothing. + + [The WAITER comes flying back with a compote for the DUTCH + YOUTH, who pays.] + +GERMAN. 'Kellner, bezahlen'! + +WAITER. 'Eine Krone sechzig'. + + [The GERMAN pays.] + +AMERICAN. [Rising, and taking out his watch--blandly] See here. If +I don't get my eggs before this watch ticks twenty, there'll be +another waiter in heaven. + +WAITER. [Flying] 'Komm' gleich'! + +AMERICAN. [Seeking sympathy] I'm gettin' kind of mad! + + [The ENGLISHMAN halves his newspaper and hands the advertisement + half to his wife. The BABY wails. The MOTHER rocks it.] + + [The DUTCH YOUTH stops eating and laughs. The GERMAN lights a + cigarette. The LITTLE MAN sits motionless, nursing his hat. + The WAITER comes flying back with the eggs and places them + before the AMERICAN.] + +AMERICAN. [Putting away his watch] Good! I don't like trouble. +How much? + + [He pays and eats. The WAITER stands a moment at the edge of + the platform and passes his hand across his brow. The LITTLE + MAN eyes him and speaks gently.] + +LITTLE MAN. Herr Ober! + + [The WAITER turns.] + +Might I have a glass of beer? + +WAITER. Yes, sare. + +LITTLE MAN. Thank you very much. + + [The WAITER goes.] + +AMERICAN. [Pausing in the deglutition of his eggs--affably] Pardon +me, sir; I'd like to have you tell me why you called that little bit +of a feller "Herr Ober." Reckon you would know what that means? +Mr. Head Waiter. + +LITTLE MAN. Yes, yes. + +AMERICAN. I smile. + +LITTLE MAN. Oughtn't I to call him that? + +GERMAN. [Abruptly] 'Nein--Kellner'. + +AMERICAN. Why, yes! Just "waiter." + + [The ENGLISHWOMAN looks round her paper for a second. The DUTCH + YOUTH stops eating and laughs. The LITTLE MAN gazes from face + to face and nurses his hat.] + +LITTLE MAN. I didn't want to hurt his feelings. + +GERMAN. Gott! + +AMERICAN. In my country we're very democratic--but that's quite a +proposition. + +ENGLISHMAN. [Handling coffee-pot, to his wife] More? + +ENGLISHWOMAN. No, thanks. + +GERMAN. [Abruptly] These fellows--if you treat them in this manner, +at once they take liberties. You see, you will not get your beer. + + [As he speaks the WAITER returns, bringing the LITTLE MAN'S + beer, then retires.] + +AMERICAN. That 'pears to be one up to democracy. [To the LITTLE +MAN] I judge you go in for brotherhood? + +LITTLE MAN. [Startled] Oh, no! + +AMERICAN. I take considerable stock in Leo Tolstoi myself. Grand +man--grand-souled apparatus. But I guess you've got to pinch those +waiters some to make 'em skip. [To the ENGLISH, who have carelessly +looked his way for a moment] You'll appreciate that, the way he +acted about my eggs. + + [The ENGLISH make faint motions with their chins and avert their + eyes.] + + [To the WAITER, who is standing at the door of the buffet] + +Waiter! Flash of beer--jump, now! + +WAITER. 'Komm' gleich'! + +GERMAN. 'Cigarren'! + +WAITER. 'Schon'! + + [He disappears.] + +AMERICAN. [Affably--to the LITTLE MAN] Now, if I don't get that +flash of beer quicker'n you got yours, I shall admire. + +GERMAN. [Abruptly] Tolstoi is nothing 'nichts'! No good! Ha? + +AMERICAN. [Relishing the approach of argument] Well, that is a +matter of temperament. Now, I'm all for equality. See that poor +woman there--very humble woman--there she sits among us with her +baby. Perhaps you'd like to locate her somewhere else? + +GERMAN. [Shrugging]. Tolstoi is 'sentimentalisch'. Nietzsche is +the true philosopher, the only one. + +AMERICAN. Well, that's quite in the prospectus--very stimulating +party--old Nietch--virgin mind. But give me Leo! [He turns to the +red-cheeked YOUTH] What do you opine, sir? I guess by your labels +you'll be Dutch. Do they read Tolstoi in your country? + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs.] + +AMERICAN. That is a very luminous answer. + +GERMAN. Tolstoi is nothing. Man should himself express. He must +push--he must be strong. + +AMERICAN. That is so. In America we believe in virility; we like a +man to expand. But we believe in brotherhood too. We draw the line +at niggers; but we aspire. Social barriers and distinctions we've +not much use for. + +ENGLISHMAN. Do you feel a draught? + +ENGLISHWOMAN. [With a shiver of her shoulder toward the AMERICAN] I +do--rather. + +GERMAN. Wait! You are a young people. + +AMERICAN. That is so; there are no flies on us. [To the LITTLE MAN, +who has been gazing eagerly from face to face] Say! I'd like to +have you give us your sentiments in relation to the duty of man. + + [The LITTLE MAN, fidgets, and is about to opens his mouth.] + +AMERICAN. For example--is it your opinion that we should kill off +the weak and diseased, and all that can't jump around? + +GERMAN. [Nodding] 'Ja, ja'! That is coming. + +LITTLE MAN. [Looking from face to face] They might be me. + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs.] + +AMERICAN. [Reproving him with a look] That's true humility. +'Tisn't grammar. Now, here's a proposition that brings it nearer the +bone: Would you step out of your way to help them when it was liable +to bring you trouble? + +GERMAN. 'Nein, nein'! That is stupid. + +LITTLE MAN. [Eager but wistful] I'm afraid not. Of course one +wants to--There was St Francis d'Assisi and St Julien L'Hospitalier, +and---- + +AMERICAN. Very lofty dispositions. Guess they died of them. [He +rises] Shake hands, sir--my name is--[He hands a card] I am an +ice-machine maker. [He shakes the LITTLE MAN's hand) I like your +sentiments--I feel kind of brotherly. [Catching sight of the WAITER +appearing in the doorway] Waiter; where to h-ll is that flash of +beer? + +GERMAN. Cigarren! + +WAITER. 'Komm' gleich'! + +ENGLISHMAN. [Consulting watch] Train's late. + +ENGLISHWOMAN. Really! Nuisance! + + [A station POLICEMAN, very square and uniformed, passes and + repasses.] + +AMERICAN. [Resuming his seat--to the GERMAN] Now, we don't have so +much of that in America. Guess we feel more to trust in human +nature. + +GERMAN. Ah! ha! you will bresently find there is nothing in him +but self. + +LITTLE MAN. [Wistfully] Don't you believe in human nature? + +AMERICAN. Very stimulating question. + + [He looks round for opinions. The DUTCH YOUTH laughs.] + +ENGLISHMAN. [Holding out his half of the paper to his wife] Swap! + + [His wife swaps.] + +GERMAN. In human nature I believe so far as I can see him--no more. + +AMERICAN. Now that 'pears to me kind o' blasphemy. I believe in +heroism. I opine there's not one of us settin' around here that's +not a hero--give him the occasion. + +LITTLE MAN. Oh! Do you believe that? + +AMERICAN. Well! I judge a hero is just a person that'll help +another at the expense of himself. Take that poor woman there. +Well, now, she's a heroine, I guess. She would die for her baby any +old time. + +GERMAN. Animals will die for their babies. That is nothing. + +AMERICAN. I carry it further. I postulate we would all die for that +baby if a locomotive was to trundle up right here and try to handle +it. [To the GERMAN] I guess you don't know how good you are. [As +the GERMAN is twisting up the ends of his moustache--to the +ENGLISHWOMAN] I should like to have you express an opinion, ma'am. + +ENGLISHWOMAN. I beg your pardon. + +AMERICAN. The English are very humanitarian; they have a very high +sense of duty. So have the Germans, so have the Americans. [To the +DUTCH YOUTH] I judge even in your little country they have that. +This is an epoch of equality and high-toned ideals. [To the LITTLE +MAN] What is your nationality, sir? + +LITTLE MAN. I'm afraid I'm nothing particular. My father was +half-English and half-American, and my mother half-German and +half-Dutch. + +AMERICAN. My! That's a bit streaky, any old way. [The POLICEMAN +passes again] Now, I don't believe we've much use any more for those +gentlemen in buttons. We've grown kind of mild--we don't think of +self as we used to do. + + [The WAITER has appeared in the doorway.] + +GERMAN. [In a voice of thunder] 'Cigarren! Donnerwetter'! + +AMERICAN. [Shaking his fist at the vanishing WAITER] That flash of +beer! + +WAITER. 'Komm' gleich'! + +AMERICAN. A little more, and he will join George Washington! I was +about to remark when he intruded: In this year of grace 1913 the +kingdom of Christ is quite a going concern. We are mighty near +universal brotherhood. The colonel here [He indicates the GERMAN] is +a man of blood and iron, but give him an opportunity to be +magnanimous, and he'll be right there. Oh, sir! yep! + + [The GERMAN, with a profound mixture of pleasure and cynicism, + brushes up the ends of his moustache.] + +LITTLE MAN. I wonder. One wants to, but somehow-- [He shakes his +head.] + +AMERICAN. You seem kind of skeery about that. You've had experience, +maybe. I'm an optimist--I think we're bound to make the devil hum in +the near future. I opine we shall occasion a good deal of trouble to +that old party. There's about to be a holocaust of selfish +interests. The colonel there with old-man Nietch he won't know +himself. There's going to be a very sacred opportunity. + + [As he speaks, the voice of a RAILWAY OFFICIAL is heard an the + distance calling out in German. It approaches, and the words + become audible.] + +GERMAN. [Startled] 'Der Teufel'! [He gets up, and seizes the bag +beside him.] + + [The STATION OFFICIAL has appeared; he stands for a moment + casting his commands at the seated group. The DUTCH YOUTH also + rises, and takes his coat and hat. The OFFICIAL turns on his + heel and retires still issuing directions.] + +ENGLISHMAN. What does he say? + +GERMAN. Our drain has come in, de oder platform; only one minute we +haf. + + [All, have risen in a fluster.] + +AMERICAN. Now, that's very provoking. I won't get that flash of +beer. + + [There is a general scurry to gather coats and hats and wraps, + during which the lowly WOMAN is seen making desperate attempts + to deal with her baby and the two large bundles. Quite + defeated, she suddenly puts all down, wrings her hands, and + cries out: "Herr Jesu! Hilfe!" The flying procession turn + their heads at that strange cry.] + +AMERICAN. What's that? Help? + + [He continues to run. The LITTLE MAN spins round, rushes back, + picks up baby and bundle on which it was seated.] + +LITTLE MAN. Come along, good woman, come along! + + [The WOMAN picks up the other bundle and they run.] + + [The WAITER, appearing in the doorway with the bottle of beer, + watches with his tired smile.] + + + CURTAIN + + + + +SCENE II + + A second-class compartment of a corridor carriage, in motion. + In it are seated the ENGLISHMAN and his WIFE, opposite each + other at the corridor end, she with her face to the engine, he + with his back. Both are somewhat protected from the rest of the + travellers by newspapers. Next to her sits the GERMAN, and + opposite him sits the AMERICAN; next the AMERICAN in one window + corner is seated the DUTCH YOUTH; the other window corner is + taken by the GERMAN'S bag. The silence is only broken by the + slight rushing noise of the train's progression and the + crackling of the English newspapers. + +AMERICAN. [Turning to the DUTCH YOUTH] Guess I'd like that window +raised; it's kind of chilly after that old run they gave us. + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs, and goes through the motions of raising + the window. The ENGLISH regard the operation with uneasy + irritation. The GERMAN opens his bag, which reposes on the + corner seat next him, and takes out a book.] + +AMERICAN. The Germans are great readers. Very stimulating practice. +I read most anything myself! + + [The GERMAN holds up the book so that the title may be read.] + +"Don Quixote"--fine book. We Americans take considerable stock in +old man Quixote. Bit of a wild-cat--but we don't laugh at him. + +GERMAN. He is dead. Dead as a sheep. A good thing, too. + +AMERICAN. In America we have still quite an amount of chivalry. + +GERMAN. Chivalry is nothing 'sentimentalisch'. In modern days--no +good. A man must push, he must pull. + +AMERICAN. So you say. But I judge your form of chivalry is +sacrifice to the state. We allow more freedom to the individual +soul. Where there's something little and weak, we feel it kind of +noble to give up to it. That way we feel elevated. + + [As he speaks there is seen in the corridor doorway the LITTLE + MAN, with the WOMAN'S BABY still on his arm and the bundle held + in the other hand. He peers in anxiously. The ENGLISH, acutely + conscious, try to dissociate themselves from his presence with + their papers. The DUTCH YOUTH laughs.] + +GERMAN. 'Ach'! So! + +AMERICAN. Dear me! + +LITTLE MAN. Is there room? I can't find a seat. + +AMERICAN. Why, yes! There's a seat for one. + +LITTLE MAN. [Depositing bundle outside, and heaving BABY] May I? + +AMERICAN. Come right in! + + [The GERMAN sulkily moves his bag. The LITTLE MAN comes in and + seats himself gingerly.] + +AMERICAN. Where's the mother? + +LITTLE MAN. [Ruefully] Afraid she got left behind. + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs. The ENGLISH unconsciously emerge from + their newspapers.] + +AMERICAN. My! That would appear to be quite a domestic incident. + + [The ENGLISHMAN suddenly utters a profound "Ha, Ha!" and + disappears behind his paper. And that paper and the one + opposite are seen to shake, and little sguirls and squeaks + emerge.] + +GERMAN. And you haf got her bundle, and her baby. Ha! [He cackles +drily.] + +AMERICAN. [Gravely] I smile. I guess Providence has played it +pretty low down on you. It's sure acted real mean. + + [The BABY wails, and the LITTLE MAN jigs it with a sort of + gentle desperation, looking apologetically from face to face. + His wistful glance renews the fore of merriment wherever it + alights. The AMERICAN alone preserves a gravity which seems + incapable of being broken.] + +AMERICAN. Maybe you'd better get off right smart and restore that +baby. There's nothing can act madder than a mother. + +LITTLE MAN. Poor thing, yes! What she must be suffering! + + [A gale of laughter shakes the carriage. The ENGLISH for a + moment drop their papers, the better to indulge. The LITTLE MAN + smiles a wintry smile.] + +AMERICAN. [In a lull] How did it eventuate? + +LITTLE MAN. We got there just as the train was going to start; and I +jumped, thinking I could help her up. But it moved too quickly, +and--and left her. + + [The gale of laughter blows up again.] + +AMERICAN. Guess I'd have thrown the baby out to her. + +LITTLE MAN. I was afraid the poor little thing might break. + + [The Baby wails; the LITTLE MAN heaves it; the gale of laughter + blows.] + +AMERICAN. [Gravely] It's highly entertaining--not for the baby. +What kind of an old baby is it, anyway? [He sniff's] I judge it's a +bit--niffy. + +LITTLE MAN. Afraid I've hardly looked at it yet. + +AMERICAN. Which end up is it? + +LITTLE MAM. Oh! I think the right end. Yes, yes, it is. + +AMERICAN. Well, that's something. Maybe you should hold it out of +window a bit. Very excitable things, babies! + +ENGLISHWOMAN. [Galvanized] No, no! + +ENGLISHMAN. [Touching her knee] My dear! + +AMERICAN. You are right, ma'am. I opine there's a draught out +there. This baby is precious. We've all of us got stock in this +baby in a manner of speaking. This is a little bit of universal +brotherhood. Is it a woman baby? + +LITTLE MAN. I--I can only see the top of its head. + +AMERICAN. You can't always tell from that. It looks kind of +over-wrapped up. Maybe it had better be unbound. + +GERMAN. 'Nein, nein, nein'! + +AMERICAN. I think you are very likely right, colonel. It might be a +pity to unbind that baby. I guess the lady should be consulted in +this matter. + +ENGLISHWOMAN. Yes, yes, of course----! + +ENGLISHMAN. [Touching her] Let it be! Little beggar seems all +right. + +AMERICAN. That would seem only known to Providence at this moment. +I judge it might be due to humanity to look at its face. + +LITTLE MAN. [Gladly] It's sucking my' finger. There, there--nice +little thing--there! + +AMERICAN. I would surmise in your leisure moments you have created +babies, sir? + +LITTLE MAN. Oh! no--indeed, no. + +AMERICAN. Dear me!--That is a loss. [Addressing himself to the +carriage at large] I think we may esteem ourselves fortunate to have +this little stranger right here with us. Demonstrates what a hold +the little and weak have upon us nowadays. The colonel here--a man +of blood and iron--there he sits quite calm next door to it. [He +sniffs] Now, this baby is rather chastening--that is a sign of +grace, in the colonel--that is true heroism. + +LITTLE MAN. [Faintly] I--I can see its face a little now. + + [All bend forward.] + +AMERICAN. What sort of a physiognomy has it, anyway? + +LITTLE MAN. [Still faintly] I don't see anything but--but spots. + +GERMAN. Oh! Ha! Pfui! + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs.] + +AMERICAN. I am told that is not uncommon amongst babies. Perhaps we +could have you inform us, ma'am. + +ENGLISHWOMAN. Yes, of course--only what sort of---- + +LITTLE MAN. They seem all over its----[At the slight recoil of +everyone] I feel sure it's--it's quite a good baby underneath. + +AMERICAN. That will be rather difficult to come at. I'm just a bit +sensitive. I've very little use for affections of the epidermis. + +GERMAN. Pfui! [He has edged away as far as he can get, and is +lighting a big cigar] + + [The DUTCH YOUTH draws his legs back.] + +AMERICAN. [Also taking out a cigar] I guess it would be well to +fumigate this carriage. Does it suffer, do you think? + +LITTLE MAN. [Peering) Really, I don't--I'm not sure--I know so +little about babies. I think it would have a nice expression--if--if +it showed. + +AMERICAN. Is it kind of boiled looking? + +LITTLE MAN. Yes--yes, it is. + +AMERICAN. [Looking gravely round] I judge this baby has the +measles. + + [The GERMAN screws himself spasmodically against the arm of the + ENGLISHWOMAN'S seat.] + +ENGLISHWOMAN. Poor little thing! Shall I----? + + [She half rises.] + +ENGLISHMAN. [Touching her] No, no---- Dash it! + +AMERICAN. I honour your emotion, ma'am. It does credit to us all. +But I sympathize with your husband too. The measles is a very +important pestilence in connection with a grown woman. + +LITTLE MAN. It likes my finger awfully. Really, it's rather a sweet +baby. + +AMERICAN. [Sniffing] Well, that would appear to be quite a +question. About them spots, now? Are they rosy? + +LITTLE MAN. No-o; they're dark, almost black. + +GERMAN. Gott! Typhus! [He bounds up on to the arm of the +ENGLISHWOMAN'S Seat.] + +AMERICAN. Typhus! That's quite an indisposition! + + [The DUTCH YOUTH rises suddenly, and bolts out into the + corridor. He is followed by the GERMAN, puffing clouds of + smoke. The ENGLISH and AMERICAN sit a moment longer without + speaking. The ENGLISHWOMAN'S face is turned with a curious + expression--half pity, half fear--towards the LITTLE MAN. Then + the ENGLISHMAN gets up.] + +ENGLISHMAN. Bit stuffy for you here, dear, isn't it? + + [He puts his arm through hers, raises her, and almost pushes her + through the doorway. She goes, still looking back.] + +AMERICAN. [Gravely] There's nothing I admire more'n courage. Guess +I'll go and smoke in the corridor. + + [As he goes out the LITTLE MAN looks very wistfully after him. + Screwing up his mouth and nose, he holds the BABY away from him + and wavers; then rising, he puts it on the seat opposite and + goes through the motions of letting down the window. Having + done so he looks at the BABY, who has begun to wail. Suddenly + he raises his hands and clasps them, like a child praying. + Since, however, the BABY does not stop wailing, he hovers over + it in indecision; then, picking it up, sits down again to dandle + it, with his face turned toward the open window. Finding that + it still wails, he begins to sing to it in a cracked little + voice. It is charmed at once. While he is singing, the + AMERICAN appears in the corridor. Letting down the passage + window, he stands there in the doorway with the draught blowing + his hair and the smoke of his cigar all about him. The LITTLE + MAN stops singing and shifts the shawl higher to protect the + BABY'S head from the draught. + +AMERICAN. [Gravely] This is the most sublime spectacle I have ever +envisaged. There ought to be a record of this. + + [The LITTLE MAN looks at him, wondering. You are typical, sir, + of the sentiments of modern Christianity. You illustrate the + deepest feelings in the heart of every man.] + + [The LITTLE MAN rises with the BABY and a movement of approach.] + +Guess I'm wanted in the dining-car. + + [He vanishes. The LITTLE MAN sits down again, but back to the + engine, away from the draught, and looks out of the window, + patiently jogging the BABY On his knee.] + + + CURTAIN + + + +SCENE III + + An arrival platform. The LITTLE MAN, with the BABY and the + bundle, is standing disconsolate, while travellers pass and + luggage is being carried by. A STATION OFFICIAL, accompanied by + a POLICEMAN, appears from a doorway, behind him. + +OFFICIAL. [Consulting telegram in his hand] 'Das ist der Herr'. + + [They advance to the LITTLE MAN.] + +OFFICIAL. 'Sie haben einen Buben gestohlen'? + +LITTLE MAN. I only speak English and American. + +OFFICIAL. 'Dies ist nicht Ihr Bube'? + + [He touches the Baby.] + +LITTLE MAN. [Shaking his head] Take care--it's ill. + + [The man does not understand.] + +Ill--the baby---- + +OFFICIAL. [Shaking his head] 'Verstehe nicht'. Dis is nod your baby? +No? + +LITTLE MAN. [Shaking his head violently] No, it is not. No. + +OFFICIAL. [Tapping the telegram] Gut! You are 'rested. [He signs +to the POLICEMAN, who takes the LITTLE MAN's arm.] + +LITTLE MAN. Why? I don't want the poor baby. + +OFFICIAL. [Lifting the bundle] 'Dies ist nicht Ihr Gepack'--pag? + +LITTLE Mary. No. + +OFFICIAL. Gut! You are 'rested. + +LITTLE MAN. I only took it for the poor woman. I'm not a thief-- +I'm--I'm---- + +OFFICIAL. [Shaking head] Verstehe nicht. + + [The LITTLE MAN tries to tear his hair. The disturbed BABY + wails.] + +LITTLE MAN. [Dandling it as best he can] There, there--poor, poor! + +OFFICIAL. Halt still! You are 'rested. It is all right. + +LITTLE MAN. Where is the mother? + +OFFICIAL. She comet by next drain. Das telegram say: 'Halt einen +Herren mit schwarzem Buben and schwarzem Gepack'. 'Rest gentleman +mit black baby and black--pag. + + [The LITTLE MAN turns up his eyes to heaven.] + +OFFICIAL. 'Komm mit us'. + + [They take the LITTLE MAN toward the door from which they have + come. A voice stops them.] + +AMERICAN. [Speaking from as far away as may be] Just a moment! + + [The OFFICIAL stops; the LITTLE MAN also stops and sits down on + a bench against the wall. The POLICEMAN stands stolidly beside + him. The AMERICAN approaches a step or two, beckoning; the + OFFICIAL goes up to him.] + +AMERICAN. Guess you've got an angel from heaven there! What's the +gentleman in buttons for? + +OFFICIAL. 'Was ist das'? + +AMERICAN. Is there anybody here that can understand American? + +OFFICIAL. 'Verstehe nicht'. + +AMERICAN. Well, just watch my gestures. I was saying [He points to +the LITTLE MAN, then makes gestures of flying] you have an angel +from heaven there. You have there a man in whom Gawd [He points +upward] takes quite an amount of stock. You have no call to arrest +him. [He makes the gesture of arrest] No, Sir. Providence has +acted pretty mean, loading off that baby on him. [He makes the +motion of dandling] The little man has a heart of gold. [He points +to his heart, and takes out a gold coin.] + +OFFICIAL. [Thinking he is about to be bribed] 'Aber, das ist zu +viel'! + +AMERICAN. Now, don't rattle me! [Pointing to the LITTLE MAN] Man +[Pointing to his heart] 'Herz' [Pointing to the coin] 'von' Gold. +This is a flower of the field--he don't want no gentleman in buttons +to pluck him up. + + [A little crowd is gathering, including the Two ENGLISH, the + GERMAN, and the DUTCH YOUTH.] + +OFFICIAL. 'Verstehe absolut nichts'. [He taps the telegram] 'Ich muss +mein' duty do. + +AMERICAN. But I'm telling you. This is a white man. This is +probably the whitest man on Gawd's earth. + +OFFICIAL. 'Das macht nichts'--gut or no gut, I muss mein duty do. +[He turns to go toward the LITTLE MAN.] + +AMERICAN. Oh! Very well, arrest him; do your duty. This baby has +typhus. + + [At the word "typhus" the OFFICIAL stops.] + +AMERICAN. [Making gestures] First-class typhus, black typhus, +schwarzen typhus. Now you have it. I'm kind o' sorry for you and +the gentleman in buttons. Do your duty! + +OFFICIAL. Typhus? Der Bub--die baby hat typhus? + +AMERICAN. I'm telling you. + +OFFICIAL. Gott im Himmel! + +AMERICAN. [Spotting the GERMAN in the little throng] here's a +gentleman will corroborate me. + +OFFICIAL. [Much disturbed, and signing to the POLICEMAN to stand +clear] Typhus! 'Aber das ist grasslich'! + +AMERICAN. I kind o' thought you'd feel like that. + +OFFICIAL. 'Die Sanitatsmachine! Gleich'! + + [A PORTER goes to get it. From either side the broken half-moon + of persons stand gazing at the LITTLE MAN, who sits unhappily + dandling the BABY in the centre.] + +OFFICIAL. [Raising his hands] 'Was zu thun'? + +AMERICAN. Guess you'd better isolate the baby. + + [A silence, during which the LITTLE MAN is heard faintly + whistling and clucking to the BABY.] + +OFFICIAL. [Referring once more to his telegram] + +"'Rest gentleman mit black baby." [Shaking his head] Wir must de +gentleman hold. [To the GERMAN] 'Bitte, mein Herr, sagen Sie ihm, +den Buben zu niedersetzen'. [He makes the gesture of deposit.] + +GERMAN. [To the LITTLE MAN] He say: Put down the baby. + + [The LITTLE MAN shakes his head, and continues to dandle the + BABY.] + +OFFICIAL. You must. + + [The LITTLE MAN glowers, in silence.] + +ENGLISHMAN. [In background--muttering] Good man! + +GERMAN. His spirit ever denies. + +OFFICIAL. [Again making his gesture] 'Aber er muss'! + + [The LITTLE MAN makes a face at him.] + +'Sag' Ihm': Instantly put down baby, and komm' mit us. + + [The BABY wails.] + +LITTLE MAN. Leave the poor ill baby here alone? Be--be--be d---d to +you! + +AMERICAN. [Jumping on to a trunk--with enthusiasm] Bully! + + [The ENGLISH clap their hands; the DUTCH YOUTH laughs. The + OFFICIAL is muttering, greatly incensed.] + +AMERICAN. What does that body-snatcher say? + +GERMAN. He say this man use the baby to save himself from arrest. +Very smart he say. + +AMERICAN. I judge you do him an injustice. [Showing off the LITTLE +MAN with a sweep of his arm.] This is a white man. He's got a black +baby, and he won' leave it in the lurch. Guess we would all act +noble that way, give us the chance. + + [The LITTLE MAN rises, holding out the BABY, and advances a step + or two. The half-moon at once gives, increasing its size;, the + AMERICAN climbs on to a higher trunk. The LITTLE MAN retires + and again sits down.] + +AMERICAN. [Addressing the OFFICIAL] Guess you'd better go out of +business and wait for the mother. + +OFFICIAL. [Stamping his foot] Die Mutter sall 'rested be for taking +out baby mit typhus. Ha! [To the LITTLE MAN] Put ze baby down! + + [The LITTLE MAN smiles.] + +Do you 'ear? + +AMERICAN. [Addressing the OFFICIAL] Now, see here. 'Pears to me +you don't suspicion just how beautiful this is. Here we have a man +giving his life for that old baby that's got no claim on him. This +is not a baby of his own making. No, sir, this is a very Christ-like +proposition in the gentleman. + +OFFICIAL. Put ze baby down, or ich will gommand someone it to do. + +AMERICAN. That will be very interesting to watch. + +OFFICIAL. [To POLICEMAN] Dake it vrom him. + + [The POLICEMAN mutters, but does not.] + +AMERICAN. [To the German] Guess I lost that. + +GERMAN. He say he is not his officier. + +AMERICAN. That just tickles me to death. + +OFFICIAL. [Looking round] Vill nobody dake ze Bub'? + +ENGLISHWOMAN. [Moving a step faintly] Yes--I---- + +ENGLISHMAN. [Grasping her arm]. By Jove! Will you! + +OFFICIAL. [Gathering himself for a great effort to take the BABY, +and advancing two steps] Zen I goummand you--[He stops and his voice +dies away] Zit dere! + +AMERICAN. My! That's wonderful. What a man this is! What a +sublime sense of duty! + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs. The OFFICIAL turns on him, but as he + does so the MOTHER of the Busy is seen hurrying.] + +MOTHER. 'Ach! Ach! Mei' Bubi'! + + [Her face is illumined; she is about to rush to the LITTLE MAN.] + +OFFICIAL. [To the POLICEMAN] 'Nimm die Frau'! + + [The POLICEMAN catches hold of the WOMAN.] + +OFFICIAL. [To the frightened WOMAN] 'Warum haben Sie einen Buben mit +Typhus mit ausgebracht'? + +AMERICAN. [Eagerly, from his perch] What was that? I don't want to +miss any. + +GERMAN. He say: Why did you a baby with typhus with you bring out? + +AMERICAN. Well, that's quite a question. + + [He takes out the field-glasses slung around him and adjusts + them on the BABY.] + +MOTHER. [Bewildered) Mei' Bubi--Typhus--aber Typhus? [She shakes +her head violently] 'Nein, nein, nein! Typhus'! + +OFFICIAL. Er hat Typhus. + +MOTHER. [Shaking her head] 'Nein, nein, nein'! + +AMERICAN. [Looking through his glasses] Guess she's kind of right 1 +I judge the typhus is where the baby' slobbered on the shawl, and +it's come off on him. + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs.] + +OFFICIAL. [Turning on him furiously] Er hat Typhus. + +AMERICAN. Now, that's where you slop over. Come right here. + + [The OFFICIAL mounts, and looks through the glasses.] + +AMERICAN. [To the LITTLE MAN] Skin out the baby's leg. If we don't +locate spots on that, it'll be good enough for me. + + [The LITTLE MAN fumbles Out the BABY'S little white foot.] + +MOTHER. Mei' Bubi! [She tries to break away.] + +AMERICAN. White as a banana. [To the OFFICIAL--affably] Guess +you've made kind of a fool of us with your old typhus. + +OFFICIAL. Lass die Frau! + + [The POLICEMAN lets her go, and she rushes to her BABY.] + +MOTHER. Mei' Bubi! + + [The BABY, exchanging the warmth of the LITTLE MAN for the + momentary chill of its MOTHER, wails.] + +OFFICIAL. [Descending and beckoning to the POLICEMAN] 'Sie wollen +den Herrn accusiren'? + + [The POLICEMAN takes the LITTLE MAN's arm.] + +AMERICAN. What's that? They goin' to pitch him after all? + + [The MOTHER, still hugging her BABY, who has stopped crying, + gazes at the LITTLE MAN, who sits dazedly looking up. Suddenly + she drops on her knees, and with her free hand lifts his booted + foot and kisses it. + +AMERICAN. [Waving his hat] Ra! Ra! [He descends swiftly, goes up +to the LITTLE MAN, whose arm the POLICEMAN has dropped, and takes his +hand] Brother; I am proud to know you. This is one of the greatest +moments I have ever experienced. [Displaying the LITTLE MAN to the +assembled company] I think I sense the situation when I say that we +all esteem it an honour to breathe the rather inferior atmosphere of +this station here Along with our little friend. I guess we shall all +go home and treasure the memory of his face as the whitest thing in +our museum of recollections. And perhaps this good woman will also +go home and wash the face of our little brother here. I am inspired +with a new faith in mankind. Ladies and gentlemen, I wish to present +to you a sure-enough saint--only wants a halo, to be transfigured. +[To the LITTLE MAN] Stand right up. + + [The LITTLE MAN stands up bewildered. They come about him. The + OFFICIAL bows to him, the POLICEMAN salutes him. The DUTCH + YOUTH shakes his head and laughs. The GERMAN draws himself up + very straight, and bows quickly twice. The ENGLISHMAN and his + WIFE approach at least two steps, then, thinking better of it, + turn to each other and recede. The MOTHER kisses his hand. The + PORTER returning with the Sanitatsmachine, turns it on from + behind, and its pinkish shower, goldened by a ray of sunlight, + falls around the LITTLE MAN's head, transfiguring it as he + stands with eyes upraised to see whence the portent comes. + +AMERICAN. [Rushing forward and dropping on his knees] Hold on just +a minute! Guess I'll take a snapshot of the miracle. [He adjusts +his pocket camera] This ought to look bully! + + + + +CURTAIN + + + + + +End of this Project Gutenberg Etext of THE LITTLE MAN, a play in the +series SIX SMALL PLAYS by John Galsworthy. + diff --git a/old/ltman10.zip b/old/ltman10.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..e0cbd6b --- /dev/null +++ b/old/ltman10.zip diff --git a/old/ltman11.txt b/old/ltman11.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..50cfe07 --- /dev/null +++ b/old/ltman11.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1411 @@ +Project Gutenberg Etext of The Little Man (Play), by John Galsworthy +#32 in our series by John Galsworthy + +Copyright laws are changing all over the world. Be sure to check the +copyright laws for your country before distributing this or any other +Project Gutenberg file. + +We encourage you to keep this file, exactly as it is, on your +own disk, thereby keeping an electronic path open for future +readers. 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Hart +and may be reprinted only when these Etexts are free of all fees.] +[Project Gutenberg is a TradeMark and may not be used in any sales +of Project Gutenberg Etexts or other materials be they hardware or +software or any other related product without express permission.] + +*END THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.10/04/01*END* + + + + + +This etext was produced by David Widger <widger@cecomet.net> + + + + + +FROM THE SERIES OF SIX SHORT PLAYS + +By John Galsworthy + + + + +THE LITTLE MAN + +A FARCICAL MORALITY IN THREE SCENES + + + + +CHARACTERS + +THE LITTLE MAN. +THE AMERICAN. +THE ENGLISHMAN. +THE ENGLISHWOMAN. +THE GERMAN. +THE DUTCH BOY. +THE MOTHER. +THE BABY. +THE WAITER. +THE STATION OFFICIAL. +THE POLICEMAN. +THE PORTER. + + + + + +SCENE I + + Afternoon, on the departure platform of an Austrian railway + station. At several little tables outside the buffet persons + are taking refreshment, served by a pale young waiter. On a + seat against the wall of the buffet a woman of lowly station is + sitting beside two large bundles, on one of which she has placed + her baby, swathed in a black shawl. + +WAITER. [Approaching a table whereat sit an English traveller and +his wife] Two coffee? + +ENGLISHMAN. [Paying] Thanks. [To his wife, in an Oxford voice] +Sugar? + +ENGLISHWOMAN. [In a Cambridge voice] One. + +AMERICAN TRAVELLER. [With field-glasses and a pocket camera from +another table] Waiter, I'd like to have you get my eggs. I've been +sitting here quite a while. + +WAITER. Yes, sare. + +GERMAN TRAVELLER. 'Kellner, bezahlen'! [His voice is, like his +moustache, stiff and brushed up at the ends. His figure also is +stiff and his hair a little grey; clearly once, if not now, a +colonel.] + +WAITER. 'Komm' gleich'! + + [The baby on the bundle wails. The mother takes it up to soothe + it. A young, red-cheecked Dutchman at the fourth table stops + eating and laughs.] + +AMERICAN. My eggs! Get a wiggle on you! + +WAITER. Yes, sare. [He rapidly recedes.] + + [A LITTLE MAN in a soft hat is seen to the right of tables. He + stands a moment looking after the hurrying waiter, then seats + himself at the fifth table.] + +ENGLISHMAN. [Looking at his watch] Ten minutes more. + +ENGLISHWOMAN. Bother! + +AMERICAN. [Addressing them] 'Pears as if they'd a prejudice against +eggs here, anyway. + + [The ENGLISH look at him, but do not speak. ] + +GERMAN. [In creditable English] In these places man can get +nothing. + + [The WAITER comes flying back with a compote for the DUTCH + YOUTH, who pays.] + +GERMAN. 'Kellner, bezahlen'! + +WAITER. 'Eine Krone sechzig'. + + [The GERMAN pays.] + +AMERICAN. [Rising, and taking out his watch--blandly] See here. If +I don't get my eggs before this watch ticks twenty, there'll be +another waiter in heaven. + +WAITER. [Flying] 'Komm' gleich'! + +AMERICAN. [Seeking sympathy] I'm gettin' kind of mad! + + [The ENGLISHMAN halves his newspaper and hands the advertisement + half to his wife. The BABY wails. The MOTHER rocks it.] + + [The DUTCH YOUTH stops eating and laughs. The GERMAN lights a + cigarette. The LITTLE MAN sits motionless, nursing his hat. + The WAITER comes flying back with the eggs and places them + before the AMERICAN.] + +AMERICAN. [Putting away his watch] Good! I don't like trouble. +How much? + + [He pays and eats. The WAITER stands a moment at the edge of + the platform and passes his hand across his brow. The LITTLE + MAN eyes him and speaks gently.] + +LITTLE MAN. Herr Ober! + + [The WAITER turns.] + +Might I have a glass of beer? + +WAITER. Yes, sare. + +LITTLE MAN. Thank you very much. + + [The WAITER goes.] + +AMERICAN. [Pausing in the deglutition of his eggs--affably] Pardon +me, sir; I'd like to have you tell me why you called that little bit +of a feller "Herr Ober." Reckon you would know what that means? +Mr. Head Waiter. + +LITTLE MAN. Yes, yes. + +AMERICAN. I smile. + +LITTLE MAN. Oughtn't I to call him that? + +GERMAN. [Abruptly] 'Nein--Kellner'. + +AMERICAN. Why, yes! Just "waiter." + + [The ENGLISHWOMAN looks round her paper for a second. The DUTCH + YOUTH stops eating and laughs. The LITTLE MAN gazes from face + to face and nurses his hat.] + +LITTLE MAN. I didn't want to hurt his feelings. + +GERMAN. Gott! + +AMERICAN. In my country we're very democratic--but that's quite a +proposition. + +ENGLISHMAN. [Handling coffee-pot, to his wife] More? + +ENGLISHWOMAN. No, thanks. + +GERMAN. [Abruptly] These fellows--if you treat them in this manner, +at once they take liberties. You see, you will not get your beer. + + [As he speaks the WAITER returns, bringing the LITTLE MAN'S + beer, then retires.] + +AMERICAN. That 'pears to be one up to democracy. [To the LITTLE +MAN] I judge you go in for brotherhood? + +LITTLE MAN. [Startled] Oh, no! + +AMERICAN. I take considerable stock in Leo Tolstoi myself. Grand +man--grand-souled apparatus. But I guess you've got to pinch those +waiters some to make 'em skip. [To the ENGLISH, who have carelessly +looked his way for a moment] You'll appreciate that, the way he +acted about my eggs. + + [The ENGLISH make faint motions with their chins and avert their + eyes.] + + [To the WAITER, who is standing at the door of the buffet] + +Waiter! Flash of beer--jump, now! + +WAITER. 'Komm' gleich'! + +GERMAN. 'Cigarren'! + +WAITER. 'Schon'! + + [He disappears.] + +AMERICAN. [Affably--to the LITTLE MAN] Now, if I don't get that +flash of beer quicker'n you got yours, I shall admire. + +GERMAN. [Abruptly] Tolstoi is nothing 'nichts'! No good! Ha? + +AMERICAN. [Relishing the approach of argument] Well, that is a +matter of temperament. Now, I'm all for equality. See that poor +woman there--very humble woman--there she sits among us with her +baby. Perhaps you'd like to locate her somewhere else? + +GERMAN. [Shrugging]. Tolstoi is 'sentimentalisch'. Nietzsche is +the true philosopher, the only one. + +AMERICAN. Well, that's quite in the prospectus--very stimulating +party--old Nietch--virgin mind. But give me Leo! [He turns to the +red-cheeked YOUTH] What do you opine, sir? I guess by your labels +you'll be Dutch. Do they read Tolstoi in your country? + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs.] + +AMERICAN. That is a very luminous answer. + +GERMAN. Tolstoi is nothing. Man should himself express. He must +push--he must be strong. + +AMERICAN. That is so. In America we believe in virility; we like a +man to expand. But we believe in brotherhood too. We draw the line +at niggers; but we aspire. Social barriers and distinctions we've +not much use for. + +ENGLISHMAN. Do you feel a draught? + +ENGLISHWOMAN. [With a shiver of her shoulder toward the AMERICAN] I +do--rather. + +GERMAN. Wait! You are a young people. + +AMERICAN. That is so; there are no flies on us. [To the LITTLE MAN, +who has been gazing eagerly from face to face] Say! I'd like to +have you give us your sentiments in relation to the duty of man. + + [The LITTLE MAN, fidgets, and is about to opens his mouth.] + +AMERICAN. For example--is it your opinion that we should kill off +the weak and diseased, and all that can't jump around? + +GERMAN. [Nodding] 'Ja, ja'! That is coming. + +LITTLE MAN. [Looking from face to face] They might be me. + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs.] + +AMERICAN. [Reproving him with a look] That's true humility. +'Tisn't grammar. Now, here's a proposition that brings it nearer the +bone: Would you step out of your way to help them when it was liable +to bring you trouble? + +GERMAN. 'Nein, nein'! That is stupid. + +LITTLE MAN. [Eager but wistful] I'm afraid not. Of course one +wants to--There was St Francis d'Assisi and St Julien L'Hospitalier, +and---- + +AMERICAN. Very lofty dispositions. Guess they died of them. [He +rises] Shake hands, sir--my name is--[He hands a card] I am an +ice-machine maker. [He shakes the LITTLE MAN's hand] I like your +sentiments--I feel kind of brotherly. [Catching sight of the WAITER +appearing in the doorway] Waiter; where to h-ll is that glass of +beer? + +GERMAN. Cigarren! + +WAITER. 'Komm' gleich'! + +ENGLISHMAN. [Consulting watch] Train's late. + +ENGLISHWOMAN. Really! Nuisance! + + [A station POLICEMAN, very square and uniformed, passes and + repasses.] + +AMERICAN. [Resuming his seat--to the GERMAN] Now, we don't have so +much of that in America. Guess we feel more to trust in human +nature. + +GERMAN. Ah! ha! you will bresently find there is nothing in him +but self. + +LITTLE MAN. [Wistfully] Don't you believe in human nature? + +AMERICAN. Very stimulating question. + + [He looks round for opinions. The DUTCH YOUTH laughs.] + +ENGLISHMAN. [Holding out his half of the paper to his wife] Swap! + + [His wife swaps.] + +GERMAN. In human nature I believe so far as I can see him--no more. + +AMERICAN. Now that 'pears to me kind o' blasphemy. I believe in +heroism. I opine there's not one of us settin' around here that's +not a hero--give him the occasion. + +LITTLE MAN. Oh! Do you believe that? + +AMERICAN. Well! I judge a hero is just a person that'll help +another at the expense of himself. Take that poor woman there. +Well, now, she's a heroine, I guess. She would die for her baby any +old time. + +GERMAN. Animals will die for their babies. That is nothing. + +AMERICAN. I carry it further. I postulate we would all die for that +baby if a locomotive was to trundle up right here and try to handle +it. [To the GERMAN] I guess you don't know how good you are. [As +the GERMAN is twisting up the ends of his moustache--to the +ENGLISHWOMAN] I should like to have you express an opinion, ma'am. + +ENGLISHWOMAN. I beg your pardon. + +AMERICAN. The English are very humanitarian; they have a very high +sense of duty. So have the Germans, so have the Americans. [To the +DUTCH YOUTH] I judge even in your little country they have that. +This is an epoch of equality and high-toned ideals. [To the LITTLE +MAN] What is your nationality, sir? + +LITTLE MAN. I'm afraid I'm nothing particular. My father was +half-English and half-American, and my mother half-German and +half-Dutch. + +AMERICAN. My! That's a bit streaky, any old way. [The POLICEMAN +passes again] Now, I don't believe we've much use any more for those +gentlemen in buttons. We've grown kind of mild--we don't think of +self as we used to do. + + [The WAITER has appeared in the doorway.] + +GERMAN. [In a voice of thunder] 'Cigarren! Donnerwetter'! + +AMERICAN. [Shaking his fist at the vanishing WAITER] That flash of +beer! + +WAITER. 'Komm' gleich'! + +AMERICAN. A little more, and he will join George Washington! I was +about to remark when he intruded: In this year of grace 1913 the +kingdom of Christ is quite a going concern. We are mighty near +universal brotherhood. The colonel here [He indicates the GERMAN] is +a man of blood and iron, but give him an opportunity to be +magnanimous, and he'll be right there. Oh, sir! yep! + + [The GERMAN, with a profound mixture of pleasure and cynicism, + brushes up the ends of his moustache.] + +LITTLE MAN. I wonder. One wants to, but somehow--[He shakes his +head.] + +AMERICAN. You seem kind of skeery about that. You've had experience, +maybe. I'm an optimist--I think we're bound to make the devil hum in +the near future. I opine we shall occasion a good deal of trouble to +that old party. There's about to be a holocaust of selfish +interests. The colonel there with old-man Nietch he won't know +himself. There's going to be a very sacred opportunity. + + [As he speaks, the voice of a RAILWAY OFFICIAL is heard an the + distance calling out in German. It approaches, and the words + become audible.] + +GERMAN. [Startled] 'Der Teufel'! [He gets up, and seizes the bag +beside him.] + + [The STATION OFFICIAL has appeared; he stands for a moment + casting his commands at the seated group. The DUTCH YOUTH also + rises, and takes his coat and hat. The OFFICIAL turns on his + heel and retires still issuing directions.] + +ENGLISHMAN. What does he say? + +GERMAN. Our drain has come in, de oder platform; only one minute we +haf. + + [All, have risen in a fluster.] + +AMERICAN. Now, that's very provoking. I won't get that flash of +beer. + + [There is a general scurry to gather coats and hats and wraps, + during which the lowly WOMAN is seen making desperate attempts + to deal with her baby and the two large bundles. Quite + defeated, she suddenly puts all down, wrings her hands, and + cries out: "Herr Jesu! Hilfe!" The flying procession turn + their heads at that strange cry.] + +AMERICAN. What's that? Help? + + [He continues to run. The LITTLE MAN spins round, rushes back, + picks up baby and bundle on which it was seated.] + +LITTLE MAN. Come along, good woman, come along! + + [The WOMAN picks up the other bundle and they run.] + + [The WAITER, appearing in the doorway with the bottle of beer, + watches with his tired smile.] + + + CURTAIN + + + + +SCENE II + + A second-class compartment of a corridor carriage, in motion. + In it are seated the ENGLISHMAN and his WIFE, opposite each + other at the corridor end, she with her face to the engine, he + with his back. Both are somewhat protected from the rest of the + travellers by newspapers. Next to her sits the GERMAN, and + opposite him sits the AMERICAN; next the AMERICAN in one window + corner is seated the DUTCH YOUTH; the other window corner is + taken by the GERMAN'S bag. The silence is only broken by the + slight rushing noise of the train's progression and the + crackling of the English newspapers. + +AMERICAN. [Turning to the DUTCH YOUTH] Guess I'd like that window +raised; it's kind of chilly after that old run they gave us. + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs, and goes through the motions of raising + the window. The ENGLISH regard the operation with uneasy + irritation. The GERMAN opens his bag, which reposes on the + corner seat next him, and takes out a book.] + +AMERICAN. The Germans are great readers. Very stimulating practice. +I read most anything myself! + + [The GERMAN holds up the book so that the title may be read.] + +"Don Quixote"--fine book. We Americans take considerable stock in +old man Quixote. Bit of a wild-cat--but we don't laugh at him. + +GERMAN. He is dead. Dead as a sheep. A good thing, too. + +AMERICAN. In America we have still quite an amount of chivalry. + +GERMAN. Chivalry is nothing 'sentimentalisch'. In modern days--no +good. A man must push, he must pull. + +AMERICAN. So you say. But I judge your form of chivalry is +sacrifice to the state. We allow more freedom to the individual +soul. Where there's something little and weak, we feel it kind of +noble to give up to it. That way we feel elevated. + + [As he speaks there is seen in the corridor doorway the LITTLE + MAN, with the WOMAN'S BABY still on his arm and the bundle held + in the other hand. He peers in anxiously. The ENGLISH, acutely + conscious, try to dissociate themselves from his presence with + their papers. The DUTCH YOUTH laughs.] + +GERMAN. 'Ach'! So! + +AMERICAN. Dear me! + +LITTLE MAN. Is there room? I can't find a seat. + +AMERICAN. Why, yes! There's a seat for one. + +LITTLE MAN. [Depositing bundle outside, and heaving BABY] May I? + +AMERICAN. Come right in! + + [The GERMAN sulkily moves his bag. The LITTLE MAN comes in and + seats himself gingerly.] + +AMERICAN. Where's the mother? + +LITTLE MAN. [Ruefully] Afraid she got left behind. + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs. The ENGLISH unconsciously emerge from + their newspapers.] + +AMERICAN. My! That would appear to be quite a domestic incident. + + [The ENGLISHMAN suddenly utters a profound "Ha, Ha!" and + disappears behind his paper. And that paper and the one + opposite are seen to shake, and little sguirls and squeaks + emerge.] + +GERMAN. And you haf got her bundle, and her baby. Ha! [He cackles +drily.] + +AMERICAN. [Gravely] I smile. I guess Providence has played it +pretty low down on you. It's sure acted real mean. + + [The BABY wails, and the LITTLE MAN jigs it with a sort of + gentle desperation, looking apologetically from face to face. + His wistful glance renews the fore of merriment wherever it + alights. The AMERICAN alone preserves a gravity which seems + incapable of being broken.] + +AMERICAN. Maybe you'd better get off right smart and restore that +baby. There's nothing can act madder than a mother. + +LITTLE MAN. Poor thing, yes! What she must be suffering! + + [A gale of laughter shakes the carriage. The ENGLISH for a + moment drop their papers, the better to indulge. The LITTLE MAN + smiles a wintry smile.] + +AMERICAN. [In a lull] How did it eventuate? + +LITTLE MAN. We got there just as the train was going to start; and I +jumped, thinking I could help her up. But it moved too quickly, +and--and left her. + + [The gale of laughter blows up again.] + +AMERICAN. Guess I'd have thrown the baby out to her. + +LITTLE MAN. I was afraid the poor little thing might break. + + [The Baby wails; the LITTLE MAN heaves it; the gale of laughter + blows.] + +AMERICAN. [Gravely] It's highly entertaining--not for the baby. +What kind of an old baby is it, anyway? [He sniff's] I judge it's a +bit--niffy. + +LITTLE MAN. Afraid I've hardly looked at it yet. + +AMERICAN. Which end up is it? + +LITTLE MAM. Oh! I think the right end. Yes, yes, it is. + +AMERICAN. Well, that's something. Maybe you should hold it out of +window a bit. Very excitable things, babies! + +ENGLISHWOMAN. [Galvanized] No, no! + +ENGLISHMAN. [Touching her knee] My dear! + +AMERICAN. You are right, ma'am. I opine there's a draught out +there. This baby is precious. We've all of us got stock in this +baby in a manner of speaking. This is a little bit of universal +brotherhood. Is it a woman baby? + +LITTLE MAN. I--I can only see the top of its head. + +AMERICAN. You can't always tell from that. It looks kind of +over-wrapped up. Maybe it had better be unbound. + +GERMAN. 'Nein, nein, nein'! + +AMERICAN. I think you are very likely right, colonel. It might be a +pity to unbind that baby. I guess the lady should be consulted in +this matter. + +ENGLISHWOMAN. Yes, yes, of course----! + +ENGLISHMAN. [Touching her] Let it be! Little beggar seems all +right. + +AMERICAN. That would seem only known to Providence at this moment. +I judge it might be due to humanity to look at its face. + +LITTLE MAN. [Gladly] It's sucking my' finger. There, there--nice +little thing--there! + +AMERICAN. I would surmise in your leisure moments you have created +babies, sir? + +LITTLE MAN. Oh! no--indeed, no. + +AMERICAN. Dear me!--That is a loss. [Addressing himself to the +carriage at large] I think we may esteem ourselves fortunate to have +this little stranger right here with us. Demonstrates what a hold +the little and weak have upon us nowadays. The colonel here--a man +of blood and iron--there he sits quite calm next door to it. [He +sniffs] Now, this baby is rather chastening--that is a sign of +grace, in the colonel--that is true heroism. + +LITTLE MAN. [Faintly] I--I can see its face a little now. + + [All bend forward.] + +AMERICAN. What sort of a physiognomy has it, anyway? + +LITTLE MAN. [Still faintly] I don't see anything but--but spots. + +GERMAN. Oh! Ha! Pfui! + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs.] + +AMERICAN. I am told that is not uncommon amongst babies. Perhaps we +could have you inform us, ma'am. + +ENGLISHWOMAN. Yes, of course--only what sort of---- + +LITTLE MAN. They seem all over its----[At the slight recoil of +everyone] I feel sure it's--it's quite a good baby underneath. + +AMERICAN. That will be rather difficult to come at. I'm just a bit +sensitive. I've very little use for affections of the epidermis. + +GERMAN. Pfui! [He has edged away as far as he can get, and is +lighting a big cigar] + + [The DUTCH YOUTH draws his legs back.] + +AMERICAN. [Also taking out a cigar] I guess it would be well to +fumigate this carriage. Does it suffer, do you think? + +LITTLE MAN. [Peering] Really, I don't--I'm not sure--I know so +little about babies. I think it would have a nice expression--if--if +it showed. + +AMERICAN. Is it kind of boiled looking? + +LITTLE MAN. Yes--yes, it is. + +AMERICAN. [Looking gravely round] I judge this baby has the +measles. + + [The GERMAN screws himself spasmodically against the arm of the + ENGLISHWOMAN'S seat.] + +ENGLISHWOMAN. Poor little thing! Shall I----? + + [She half rises.] + +ENGLISHMAN. [Touching her] No, no----Dash it! + +AMERICAN. I honour your emotion, ma'am. It does credit to us all. +But I sympathize with your husband too. The measles is a very +important pestilence in connection with a grown woman. + +LITTLE MAN. It likes my finger awfully. Really, it's rather a sweet +baby. + +AMERICAN. [Sniffing] Well, that would appear to be quite a +question. About them spots, now? Are they rosy? + +LITTLE MAN. No-o; they're dark, almost black. + +GERMAN. Gott! Typhus! [He bounds up on to the arm of the +ENGLISHWOMAN'S Seat.] + +AMERICAN. Typhus! That's quite an indisposition! + + [The DUTCH YOUTH rises suddenly, and bolts out into the + corridor. He is followed by the GERMAN, puffing clouds of + smoke. The ENGLISH and AMERICAN sit a moment longer without + speaking. The ENGLISHWOMAN'S face is turned with a curious + expression--half pity, half fear--towards the LITTLE MAN. Then + the ENGLISHMAN gets up.] + +ENGLISHMAN. Bit stuffy for you here, dear, isn't it? + + [He puts his arm through hers, raises her, and almost pushes her + through the doorway. She goes, still looking back.] + +AMERICAN. [Gravely] There's nothing I admire more'n courage. Guess +I'll go and smoke in the corridor. + + [As he goes out the LITTLE MAN looks very wistfully after him. + Screwing up his mouth and nose, he holds the BABY away from him + and wavers; then rising, he puts it on the seat opposite and + goes through the motions of letting down the window. Having + done so he looks at the BABY, who has begun to wail. Suddenly + he raises his hands and clasps them, like a child praying. + Since, however, the BABY does not stop wailing, he hovers over + it in indecision; then, picking it up, sits down again to dandle + it, with his face turned toward the open window. Finding that + it still wails, he begins to sing to it in a cracked little + voice. It is charmed at once. While he is singing, the + AMERICAN appears in the corridor. Letting down the passage + window, he stands there in the doorway with the draught blowing + his hair and the smoke of his cigar all about him. The LITTLE + MAN stops singing and shifts the shawl higher to protect the + BABY'S head from the draught.] + +AMERICAN. [Gravely] This is the most sublime spectacle I have ever +envisaged. There ought to be a record of this. + + [The LITTLE MAN looks at him, wondering. You are typical, sir, + of the sentiments of modern Christianity. You illustrate the + deepest feelings in the heart of every man.] + + [The LITTLE MAN rises with the BABY and a movement of approach.] + +Guess I'm wanted in the dining-car. + + [He vanishes. The LITTLE MAN sits down again, but back to the + engine, away from the draught, and looks out of the window, + patiently jogging the BABY On his knee.] + + + CURTAIN + + + +SCENE III + + An arrival platform. The LITTLE MAN, with the BABY and the + bundle, is standing disconsolate, while travellers pass and + luggage is being carried by. A STATION OFFICIAL, accompanied by + a POLICEMAN, appears from a doorway, behind him. + +OFFICIAL. [Consulting telegram in his hand] 'Das ist der Herr'. + + [They advance to the LITTLE MAN.] + +OFFICIAL. 'Sie haben einen Buben gestohlen'? + +LITTLE MAN. I only speak English and American. + +OFFICIAL. 'Dies ist nicht Ihr Bube'? + + [He touches the Baby.] + +LITTLE MAN. [Shaking his head] Take care--it's ill. + + [The man does not understand.] + +Ill--the baby---- + +OFFICIAL. [Shaking his head] 'Verstehe nicht'. Dis is nod your baby? +No? + +LITTLE MAN. [Shaking his head violently] No, it is not. No. + +OFFICIAL. [Tapping the telegram] Gut! You are 'rested. [He signs +to the POLICEMAN, who takes the LITTLE MAN's arm.] + +LITTLE MAN. Why? I don't want the poor baby. + +OFFICIAL. [Lifting the bundle] 'Dies ist nicht Ihr Gepack'--pag? + +LITTLE Mary. No. + +OFFICIAL. Gut! You are 'rested. + +LITTLE MAN. I only took it for the poor woman. I'm not a thief-- +I'm--I'm---- + +OFFICIAL. [Shaking head] Verstehe nicht. + + [The LITTLE MAN tries to tear his hair. The disturbed BABY + wails.] + +LITTLE MAN. [Dandling it as best he can] There, there--poor, poor! + +OFFICIAL. Halt still! You are 'rested. It is all right. + +LITTLE MAN. Where is the mother? + +OFFICIAL. She comet by next drain. Das telegram say: 'Halt einen +Herren mit schwarzem Buben and schwarzem Gepack'. 'Rest gentleman +mit black baby and black--pag. + + [The LITTLE MAN turns up his eyes to heaven.] + +OFFICIAL. 'Komm mit us'. + + [They take the LITTLE MAN toward the door from which they have + come. A voice stops them.] + +AMERICAN. [Speaking from as far away as may be] Just a moment! + + [The OFFICIAL stops; the LITTLE MAN also stops and sits down on + a bench against the wall. The POLICEMAN stands stolidly beside + him. The AMERICAN approaches a step or two, beckoning; the + OFFICIAL goes up to him.] + +AMERICAN. Guess you've got an angel from heaven there! What's the +gentleman in buttons for? + +OFFICIAL. 'Was ist das'? + +AMERICAN. Is there anybody here that can understand American? + +OFFICIAL. 'Verstehe nicht'. + +AMERICAN. Well, just watch my gestures. I was saying [He points to +the LITTLE MAN, then makes gestures of flying] you have an angel +from heaven there. You have there a man in whom Gawd [He points +upward] takes quite an amount of stock. You have no call to arrest +him. [He makes the gesture of arrest] No, Sir. Providence has +acted pretty mean, loading off that baby on him. [He makes the +motion of dandling] The little man has a heart of gold. [He points +to his heart, and takes out a gold coin.] + +OFFICIAL. [Thinking he is about to be bribed] 'Aber, das ist zu +viel'! + +AMERICAN. Now, don't rattle me! [Pointing to the LITTLE MAN] Man +[Pointing to his heart] 'Herz' [Pointing to the coin] 'von' Gold. +This is a flower of the field--he don't want no gentleman in buttons +to pluck him up. + + [A little crowd is gathering, including the Two ENGLISH, the + GERMAN, and the DUTCH YOUTH.] + +OFFICIAL. 'Verstehe absolut nichts'. [He taps the telegram] 'Ich muss +mein' duty do. + +AMERICAN. But I'm telling you. This is a white man. This is +probably the whitest man on Gawd's earth. + +OFFICIAL. 'Das macht nichts'--gut or no gut, I muss mein duty do. +[He turns to go toward the LITTLE MAN.] + +AMERICAN. Oh! Very well, arrest him; do your duty. This baby has +typhus. + + [At the word "typhus" the OFFICIAL stops.] + +AMERICAN. [Making gestures] First-class typhus, black typhus, +schwarzen typhus. Now you have it. I'm kind o' sorry for you and +the gentleman in buttons. Do your duty! + +OFFICIAL. Typhus? Der Bub--die baby hat typhus? + +AMERICAN. I'm telling you. + +OFFICIAL. Gott im Himmel! + +AMERICAN. [Spotting the GERMAN in the little throng] here's a +gentleman will corroborate me. + +OFFICIAL. [Much disturbed, and signing to the POLICEMAN to stand +clear] Typhus! 'Aber das ist grasslich'! + +AMERICAN. I kind o' thought you'd feel like that. + +OFFICIAL. 'Die Sanitatsmachine! Gleich'! + + [A PORTER goes to get it. From either side the broken half-moon + of persons stand gazing at the LITTLE MAN, who sits unhappily + dandling the BABY in the centre.] + +OFFICIAL. [Raising his hands] 'Was zu thun'? + +AMERICAN. Guess you'd better isolate the baby. + + [A silence, during which the LITTLE MAN is heard faintly + whistling and clucking to the BABY.] + +OFFICIAL. [Referring once more to his telegram] + +"'Rest gentleman mit black baby." [Shaking his head] Wir must de +gentleman hold. [To the GERMAN] 'Bitte, mein Herr, sagen Sie ihm, +den Buben zu niedersetzen'. [He makes the gesture of deposit.] + +GERMAN. [To the LITTLE MAN] He say: Put down the baby. + + [The LITTLE MAN shakes his head, and continues to dandle the + BABY.] + +OFFICIAL. You must. + + [The LITTLE MAN glowers, in silence.] + +ENGLISHMAN. [In background--muttering] Good man! + +GERMAN. His spirit ever denies. + +OFFICIAL. [Again making his gesture] 'Aber er muss'! + + [The LITTLE MAN makes a face at him.] + +'Sag' Ihm': Instantly put down baby, and komm' mit us. + + [The BABY wails.] + +LITTLE MAN. Leave the poor ill baby here alone? Be--be--be d---d to +you! + +AMERICAN. [Jumping on to a trunk--with enthusiasm] Bully! + + [The ENGLISH clap their hands; the DUTCH YOUTH laughs. The + OFFICIAL is muttering, greatly incensed.] + +AMERICAN. What does that body-snatcher say? + +GERMAN. He say this man use the baby to save himself from arrest. +Very smart he say. + +AMERICAN. I judge you do him an injustice. [Showing off the LITTLE +MAN with a sweep of his arm.] This is a white man. He's got a black +baby, and he won' leave it in the lurch. Guess we would all act +noble that way, give us the chance. + + [The LITTLE MAN rises, holding out the BABY, and advances a step + or two. The half-moon at once gives, increasing its size; the + AMERICAN climbs on to a higher trunk. The LITTLE MAN retires + and again sits down.] + +AMERICAN. [Addressing the OFFICIAL] Guess you'd better go out of +business and wait for the mother. + +OFFICIAL. [Stamping his foot] Die Mutter sall 'rested be for taking +out baby mit typhus. Ha! [To the LITTLE MAN] Put ze baby down! + + [The LITTLE MAN smiles.] + +Do you 'ear? + +AMERICAN. [Addressing the OFFICIAL] Now, see here. 'Pears to me +you don't suspicion just how beautiful this is. Here we have a man +giving his life for that old baby that's got no claim on him. This +is not a baby of his own making. No, sir, this is a very Christ-like +proposition in the gentleman. + +OFFICIAL. Put ze baby down, or ich will gommand someone it to do. + +AMERICAN. That will be very interesting to watch. + +OFFICIAL. [To POLICEMAN] Dake it vrom him. + + [The POLICEMAN mutters, but does not.] + +AMERICAN. [To the German] Guess I lost that. + +GERMAN. He say he is not his officier. + +AMERICAN. That just tickles me to death. + +OFFICIAL. [Looking round] Vill nobody dake ze Bub'? + +ENGLISHWOMAN. [Moving a step faintly] Yes--I---- + +ENGLISHMAN. [Grasping her arm]. By Jove! Will you! + +OFFICIAL. [Gathering himself for a great effort to take the BABY, +and advancing two steps] Zen I goummand you--[He stops and his voice +dies away] Zit dere! + +AMERICAN. My! That's wonderful. What a man this is! What a +sublime sense of duty! + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs. The OFFICIAL turns on him, but as he + does so the MOTHER of the Busy is seen hurrying.] + +MOTHER. 'Ach! Ach! Mei' Bubi'! + + [Her face is illumined; she is about to rush to the LITTLE MAN.] + +OFFICIAL. [To the POLICEMAN] 'Nimm die Frau'! + + [The POLICEMAN catches hold of the WOMAN.] + +OFFICIAL. [To the frightened WOMAN] 'Warum haben Sie einen Buben mit +Typhus mit ausgebracht'? + +AMERICAN. [Eagerly, from his perch] What was that? I don't want to +miss any. + +GERMAN. He say: Why did you a baby with typhus with you bring out? + +AMERICAN. Well, that's quite a question. + + [He takes out the field-glasses slung around him and adjusts + them on the BABY.] + +MOTHER. [Bewildered] Mei' Bubi--Typhus--aber Typhus? [She shakes +her head violently] 'Nein, nein, nein! Typhus'! + +OFFICIAL. Er hat Typhus. + +MOTHER. [Shaking her head] 'Nein, nein, nein'! + +AMERICAN. [Looking through his glasses] Guess she's kind of right! +I judge the typhus is where the baby' slobbered on the shawl, and +it's come off on him. + + [The DUTCH YOUTH laughs.] + +OFFICIAL. [Turning on him furiously] Er hat Typhus. + +AMERICAN. Now, that's where you slop over. Come right here. + + [The OFFICIAL mounts, and looks through the glasses.] + +AMERICAN. [To the LITTLE MAN] Skin out the baby's leg. If we don't +locate spots on that, it'll be good enough for me. + + [The LITTLE MAN fumbles Out the BABY'S little white foot.] + +MOTHER. Mei' Bubi! [She tries to break away.] + +AMERICAN. White as a banana. [To the OFFICIAL--affably] Guess +you've made kind of a fool of us with your old typhus. + +OFFICIAL. Lass die Frau! + + [The POLICEMAN lets her go, and she rushes to her BABY.] + +MOTHER. Mei' Bubi! + + [The BABY, exchanging the warmth of the LITTLE MAN for the + momentary chill of its MOTHER, wails.] + +OFFICIAL. [Descending and beckoning to the POLICEMAN] 'Sie wollen +den Herrn accusiren'? + + [The POLICEMAN takes the LITTLE MAN's arm.] + +AMERICAN. What's that? They goin' to pitch him after all? + + [The MOTHER, still hugging her BABY, who has stopped crying, + gazes at the LITTLE MAN, who sits dazedly looking up. Suddenly + she drops on her knees, and with her free hand lifts his booted + foot and kisses it.] + +AMERICAN. [Waving his hat] Ra! Ra! [He descends swiftly, goes up +to the LITTLE MAN, whose arm the POLICEMAN has dropped, and takes his +hand] Brother; I am proud to know you. This is one of the greatest +moments I have ever experienced. [Displaying the LITTLE MAN to the +assembled company] I think I sense the situation when I say that we +all esteem it an honour to breathe the rather inferior atmosphere of +this station here Along with our little friend. I guess we shall all +go home and treasure the memory of his face as the whitest thing in +our museum of recollections. And perhaps this good woman will also +go home and wash the face of our little brother here. I am inspired +with a new faith in mankind. Ladies and gentlemen, I wish to present +to you a sure-enough saint--only wants a halo, to be transfigured. +[To the LITTLE MAN] Stand right up. + + [The LITTLE MAN stands up bewildered. They come about him. The + OFFICIAL bows to him, the POLICEMAN salutes him. The DUTCH + YOUTH shakes his head and laughs. The GERMAN draws himself up + very straight, and bows quickly twice. The ENGLISHMAN and his + WIFE approach at least two steps, then, thinking better of it, + turn to each other and recede. The MOTHER kisses his hand. The + PORTER returning with the Sanitatsmachine, turns it on from + behind, and its pinkish shower, goldened by a ray of sunlight, + falls around the LITTLE MAN's head, transfiguring it as he + stands with eyes upraised to see whence the portent comes.] + +AMERICAN. [Rushing forward and dropping on his knees] Hold on just +a minute! Guess I'll take a snapshot of the miracle. [He adjusts +his pocket camera] This ought to look bully! + + + + +CURTAIN + + + + +End of this Project Gutenberg Etext of THE LITTLE MAN (Play) +by John Galsworthy. + diff --git a/old/ltman11.zip b/old/ltman11.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..c7ee1df --- /dev/null +++ b/old/ltman11.zip |