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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/30445-0.txt b/30445-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..f9d94dc --- /dev/null +++ b/30445-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,2204 @@ +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 30445 *** + + The Flamp, The Ameliorator, and The Schoolboy's Apprentice + + By E. V. LUCAS + + +LONDON: GRANT RICHARDS +1900 + +_First printed October_ 1897 +_Reprinted December_ 1897 + " _August_ 1899 + " _December_ 1900 + + + + +_CONTENTS_ + + +_The Flamp_ + +_The Ameliorator_ + +_The Schoolboy's Apprentice_ + + + + +The Flamp + + +_TO MOLLY AND HILDA_. + + _That sunny afternoon in May,_ + _How stealthily we crept away,_ + _We three--(Good things are done in threes:_ + _That is, good things in threes are done_ + _When you make two and I make one.)--_ + _To hatch our small conspiracies!_ + + _Between the blossomy apple-trees_ + _(You recollect?) we sped, and then_ + _Safe in the green heart of the wood_ + _We breathed again._ + _The purple flood the bluebells made_ + _Washed round about us where we stood,_ + _While voices, where the others played,_ + _Assured us we were not pursued._ + + _A fence to climb or wriggle through,_ + _A strip of meadow wet with dew_ + _To cross, and lo! before us flared_ + _The clump of yellow gorse we shared_ + _With five young blackbirds and their mother._ + _There, close beside our partners' nest,_ + _And free from Mr. C. (that pest!),_ + _And careless of the wind and damp,_ + _We framed the story of_ The Flamp. + + _And O! Collaborators kind,_ + _The wish is often in my mind,_ + _That we, in just such happy plight,--_ + _With Chanctonbury Ring in sight,--_ + _Some day may frame another._ + + E. V. L. + 1896. + + + + +The Flamp + + + + +I + + +Once upon a time there dwelt in a far country two children, a sister and +a brother, named Tilsa and Tobene. Tilsa was twelve and Tobene was ten, +and they had grown up, as it were, hand in hand. Their father died when +Tobene was only a little piece of pink dimpled dough, and when their +mother died too, a few years after, old Alison was told to pack up the +things and journey with Tilsa and Tobene to the children's grandfather, +the Liglid (or Lord Mayor) of Ule, whom they had never yet seen. + +Old Alison was their nurse, and she had been their father's nurse before +them. Nothing worth knowing was unknown to old Alison: she could tell +them where the fairies danced by night, and the names and habits of the +different people who live in the stars, and the reason why thrushes' +eggs have black spots and hedge sparrows' none, and how to make Toffee +of Paradise, and a thousand useful and wonderful things beside. + +Alison was old and wrinkled and bent, but there was not a warmer heart +in all the world, and no tongue could say kinder words than hers, and no +hands minister so lovingly to those who needed help. It was said that +Alison had only to look at a sore place and it was healed again. If any +one loved her more than Tilsa it was Tobene; and if any one loved her +more than Tobene it was Tilsa; and old Alison's love for them was as +strong. + +On the day appointed, the three travellers set forth in a chariot driven +by postilions, and in the course of a week's journeying through strange +countries came at last to Ule. + +At the southern gate they were met by the Liglid. They discovered him to +be more than a mere person--a Personage!--with white hair, and little +beady eyes, and a red nose, and a gold-laced hat. + +'Welcome,' said he, 'welcome, Tilsa and Tobene, to the city or Ule.' And +then he kissed the air an inch or two from the cheek of his +grandchildren and led the way to his house. + + + + +II + + +Ule was a little city in the midst of a wide plain, and round about it +was a stout wall. One straight, white road crossed the plain from end to +end, entering the city at the northern gate and leaving it by the +southern gate. The borders of the plain were blue mountains whose peaks +reached the sky, and among these peaks the sun made his bed. At least, +so said the good people of Ule. + +Nothing could shake their faith, for did they not every morning see him +rise from the eastern peaks, fresh and ready for the day's work of +warming the air of Ule, and encouraging the trees of Ule to bear fruit +and the buds of Ule to spread into flowers? And every evening did they +not see him, tired and faint, sink to rest amid the western peaks? The +rare strangers who came now and then to the city and heard this story, +were apt to smile unbelievingly and ask laughingly how, after laying his +head among the pillows on the western side of the plain, the sun was +able to wake up on the opposite side, many miles distant? + +But this question presented no difficulty to the good people of Ule. +'Why,' they would reply a little irritably, for they liked to think that +the sun was theirs and theirs only, 'surely the sun can walk in his +sleep as well--nay, better--than ordinary folk? A baby could see that!' +they would add with a laugh. + +So it was settled that the sun spent all his time in the neighbourhood +of Ule. If the citizens had ever travelled away from their native part, +perhaps they would have thought otherwise; but they rarely, or never, +did. + +'What!' they would say, in pained astonishment, 'leave Ule! Why?' + +'To see the world,' the rash stranger who had made the suggestion might +reply. + +'The world? This is the world,' would be the answer. + +And they really believed that it was. The knowledge that thousands of +other places, no whit less happy than themselves, or even more happy, +were in existence would have made the Ulians quite bad-tempered. And +beyond doubt they were in need of no other cause to excite their anger, +for had they not the Flamp? + + + + +III + + +The Flamp was a monster who dwelt in a cave somewhere in the mountains +that surrounded the plain. Once every year, on Christmas night, the +Flamp came into the city and threw the population into a frenzy of +terror. That on this night of the year, a night set apart for joyfulness +and festivity, the Loathly Beast (for so he was called by orators in the +City Council when they had used the word Flamp often enough) should +invade their city, seeking his prey, seemed to the Ulians an act of the +grossest cruelty and injustice. Almost as soon as darkness had fallen on +Christmas Day, the noises in the city would cease, and the house-holders +and their families would sit within barred doors, with uplifted fingers, +holding their breath, and listening, listening. Then in the far distance +_flob! flob!_ faint, _FLOB!! FLOB!!_ less faint, _FLOB!!! FLOB!!!_ +less faint, every moment louder, coming nearer and nearer, until the +earth shook, and the Flamp's flobbing, flamping feet filled the air with +deafening thuds. + +All keys were turned, all bolts were drawn, all blinds were down, by the +time he entered the city. Not a light was visible. The Flamp was heard +sniffing at this door, fumbling at the handle of that, knocking at +another, while the _shuff! shuff!_ of his sides against the walls was +quite audible. Now and then he would sit down in the road and sigh +deeply, and the trembling listeners near by could hear the splashing of +his tears on the stones. + +After passing through every street, the Flamp would turn out of the gate +once more, and swing off across the plain to his cave in the mountains, +the earth would cease to tremble, and fainter and fainter would sound +his footfalls: _FLOB!!! FLOB!!! FLOB!! FLOB!! flob!_ flob! until +at last all was still again. Then with white faces and shaking limbs the +citizens would crawl to bed, bemoaning their lot. + +The next day the streets were examined to see if any damage had been +done, but nothing was ever found except pools of water where the Flamp +had sat down to sigh and weep. One strange thing was observed after +every visit of the Flamp: these pools were always opposite houses where +there were children. + +'He comes for the children,' was the natural conclusion of the people. +'See how the Monster cries with rage and disappointment when he finds +all doors barred to him.' + +Measures had of course been taken to keep the Flamp out of Ule. The +gates were barricaded: he broke them down as easily as you break new +toys; spring guns were placed in the roads: they went off, the bullets +struck his hide, and, rebounding, smashed several windows, while one +even ricochetted against the statue of the Liglid in the market-place +and chipped off a piece of his Excellency's nose; poisoned meat was +spread about temptingly: in the morning it was found all gathered +together on the doorstep of the Sanitary Inspector. Thus in time it +became clear that the Flamp was not to be checked, and for many years +before the time of our story no other attempts had been made. + + + + +IV + + +The first knowledge of the Flamp which came to Tilsa and Tobene was +gained at breakfast on Christmas morning, when the Liglid warned them of +the precautions necessary in the city at night, and besought them to +make no noise lest the attention of the Loathly Beast should be drawn to +their house. + +'But what is the Flamp?' asked Tilsa. + +'What!' said the Liglid. 'A monster, a dreadful monster!' + +'What is it like?' Tobene asked. + +'Like?' said the Liglid, 'like? Why, no one knows. No one has seen it. +But we can hear it--oh, horrible, horrible!' and the little man covered +his eyes and shuddered. + +'Why does it come?' Tilsa went on. + +'To eat us,' said the Liglid. + +'How many people has it eaten?' said Tobene. + +'Eh!' the Liglid replied. 'Well, I don't--well, I can't exactly--well, I +don't think it has ever eaten any one yet. But it wants to and means +to.' + +'Then how do you know it wants to eat you?' Tilsa persisted. + +'Because,' said the Liglid, 'because it sounds like it.' + +At night the Flamp came, and the city trembled and the earth shook. +Before the Liglid's house it sat down and wept and sighed for fully five +minutes, while within doors the Liglid turned all the colours of the +rainbow with fright. 'His face was fine,' said Tobene afterwards: 'just +like those whirligig things at the end of magic-lantern shows.' From +which remark you may judge that Tobene did not share his grandfather's +alarm, nor did Tilsa, nor old Alison. + +The next morning there was a pool outside the Liglid's house large +enough to sail a boat on. + + + + +V + + +One day not long after the Flamp's visit, Tilsa ran into old Alison's +room to ask something, and was surprised and grieved to find her nurse +rocking to and fro in her chair, with her face covered. Now and then +between her fingers trickled the tears, and Alison sighed deeply. + +'What is it?' Tilsa asked, kneeling beside her. 'Can I do anything, dear +Alison?' + +'Only stay here, dearie,' sobbed the old woman. 'I was remembering +happier days. Stay here, Tilsa dear. All I want is sympathy.' + +So Tilsa stayed, and Alison soon was herself again. 'Thank you, dearie,' +she said as she wiped her eyes and jumped up ready to set to work again; +'you have done me a world of good. Always be sympathetic if you can. No +one knows how grateful it is.' + +It was nearly bed-time, and Tilsa went downstairs to say good-night to +the Liglid. On the way her little white forehead was puckered into lines +like a railway map. + +She entered her grandfather's room softly. The old man was seated on one +side of his desk; on the other was the Town Clerk of Ule. Between them +was a large sheet of paper with these words at the top: + + 'A BILL FOR THE CIRCUMVENTION + OF THE FLAMP.' + +They were too busy to notice Tilsa's entrance. + +'We must hurry it through the House,' the Liglid was saying, 'or there +won't be time. Rigmarola is a long way off.' + +'How long will it take to march the troops here?' the Town Clerk asked. + +'Fully six months,' said the Liglid, 'and then they must be drilled. +They don't fight Flamps every day, and they may find it difficult to fix +upon a mode of attack. What a pity it is,' he added, 'that Ule has no +army.' + +'It will be expensive,' said the Town Clerk. + +'Money,' the Liglid remarked, 'is no object where the circumvention of +the Flamp is concerned. The city has suffered long enough.' + +'True,' said the Town Clerk. + +Tilsa now ventured to interrupt. 'Grandpapa,' she said, 'I've come to +say good-night.' + +'Eh!' said the old man, now seeing her for the first time. 'Good-night? +Oh yes! good-night, my dear'; and after his wont he kissed the air an +inch from her cheek. + +Tilsa did not at once run out of the room as she generally did, rather +glad to have done with the ceremony; instead, she spoke again. +'Grandpapa, I think I know what the Flamp wants when he comes to the +town.' + +'Eh!' cried the Liglid, who was intent on his Bill again. 'Eh! I thought +you'd gone to bed. You know what the Flamp comes for?' he continued. + +'Yes,' said Tilsa, 'it's not to eat people at all, or to do any harm; +it's for sympathy.' + +'Rubbish!' said the Liglid. 'Nonsense--don't meddle with things you +don't understand. Run off to bed at once.' + + + + +VI + + +For a long time Tilsa lay awake, putting two and two together and making +four every time. Then she jumped out of bed and pattered with her bare +feet into Tobene's room. + +'Toby,' she said, gently shaking him. 'Toby!' + +Tobene thrust out his arms and looked at her with eyes that saw nothing. + +'Toby,' Tilsa said again. 'It's me--Tilsa.' + +'Yes,' he said in the tone of one who is not much interested. 'What is +it?' + +'I've found out,' said Tilsa, 'what the Flamp comes for every year.' + +'What?' said Tobene. + +'Sympathy,' said Tilsa. + +'What's sympathy?' said Tobene. + +'Oh, it's putting your arms round people and being sorry for them.' + +'Pooh,' said Tobene, 'if that's sympathy, you must be wrong. He's too +big.' + +But Tilsa was not in the least discouraged. + +'No, Toby,' she said, 'I'm right. And, Toby, Toby, darling, I want to go +and find the Flamp and say I'm sorry for him, and I want you to come +with me.' + +'Me?' cried Tobene, now wide awake. + +'Of course,' said Tilsa. 'We've never done anything alone yet, and I +don't want to begin now.' + +'Well, I suppose it's all right,' Tobene faltered. 'But he's drefful +big, isn't he?' + +'I'm afraid he is rather large,' said Tilsa, as cheerfully as she could. + +'And isn't he mighty ferocious?' + +'Well,' said Tilsa, 'they say so, but nobody's sure. And you know, Toby +dear, what silly things the people here say about the sun shining +nowhere else but on the plain. We know better than that, don't we? Well, +very likely they're just as wrong about the Flamp. So you will go, Toby, +won't you?' + +'Yes, I'll go,' said Tobene. 'When shall we start?' + +'Now,' said Tilsa. 'I want you to dress directly without making any +noise. I'm going to write a little note to Alison,--she's too old to +come with us,--and then I'll be ready too.' + +Tilsa hurried back to her room, and wrote the following note to old +Alison:-- + + MY VERY DEAR ALISON--Toby and me are going to try and find the + Flamp and give him simpithy, which I am sure is what he wants, + because he cries and makes a noise just like you did to-day, only + louder, and that is what you said you wanted, dear Alison. Please + don't be frightened, because you said we ought always to give + simpithy when we can, however much it costs us. Please tell + grandpapa if the Flamp is what I think he is there won't be any + need to sircumvent him. With love and kisses, your loving TILSA. + +Tilsa slipped the note under Alison's door and then fetched Tobene from +his room. They went first to the larder and packed a small basket with +food. Tobene's vote was for blancmange and jam tarts, but Tilsa said +that bread and biscuits were better. + +'How about salt?' Toby asked. + +'Salt?' said Tilsa, 'what for?' + +'To put on the Flamp's tail and catch him,' said Toby. 'Else how are you +going to hug him, Tilsa?' + + + + +VII + + +The two little explorers squeezed through the bars of the northern gate +and for an hour or more hurried as fast as they could along the white +road. They had no plan. All that Tilsa knew was that the Flamp lived +somewhere in the mountains, but whether it was north or south, east or +west, she could not say. + +At the end of the second hour, Tilsa felt certain that it was time to +leave the road, because day was not far off and they were very weary. + +'Cheer up, Toby,' she said. 'We'll soon lie down and have some sleep. +I'm going to shut my eyes and I want you to turn me round three times, +and whichever way I walk then, that way we shall go.' + +This was done, and Tilsa struck off to the left of the road into the +plain. Then after walking for nearly an hour longer, they came to a +little dell with a pool at the bottom and bushes growing on its sides, +and here Tilsa stopped. The two children lay down together under a bush +and at once fell asleep. + +When Tilsa awoke, it was broad day. She roused Tobene, and they went to +the pool and splashed some water over their faces and hands, and then +Tilsa opened the basket. Breakfast consisted only of bread and butter +and biscuits, but as they were hungry it was better than a banquet. The +real business of the day was yet to begin, and Tilsa was wondering how +to set about learning the road, when both children were startled by a +wee voice. + +'I call that piggish,' it said. 'And inconsiderate too.' + +Not seeing any speaker, neither child replied but only stared at each +other in puzzlement. + +'Yes,' the tiny voice continued, 'people can be too tidy. Dropping +crumbs is a bad habit in the house, I know, but out of doors it becomes +a virtue. People who get up first thing in the morning to gorge +themselves with bread and biscuits in this greedy way, and then drop no +crumbs--well, piggish and inconsiderate is what I call them.' + +The accusation aroused Tilsa. 'We didn't gorge,' she said, 'whoever you +are, and we've slept here all night. But here are some crumbs for you, +anyway,' and so saying, she broke up a piece of bread and scattered it +on the ground. + +Immediately a little fiery-crested wren hopped down from a branch of the +bush and began to peck among the grass. + +'Thank you,' he said when he had finished; 'but if you had done it +without being asked it would have been better.' + +'We didn't see you,' said Tobene in excuse. + +'Doesn't matter,' the wren replied; 'birds is everywhere, and always +hungry. Wherever you drop crumbs you may be sure they'll be acceptable. +Remember that. Now, is there anything I can do for you?' + +'Well,' said Tilsa, 'we want to know the way to the Flamp.' + +'Before I tell you,' said the wren, 'you must inform me whether I am +speaking to a boy or a girl.' + +'I am a girl,' said Tilsa. 'Toby here is a boy.' + +'Very well,' the wren answered. 'Then I must talk to Toby. I make it a +rule never to join in friendly conversation with women. They wear my +feathers in their hats.' + +'But men shoot you,' Tobene interposed, angry that Tilsa should be +treated in this way. + +'True,' said the wren, 'true. But so long as there are men, birds must +expect to be shot. It's all in the day's work and must be endured. But +for one's body to go to the milliner's is intolerable. Intolerable.' The +little creature suddenly swallowed its rage, and continued more sweetly: +'Now, as to the Flamp. What you want, Toby, is a Flamp compass.' + +'What's that?' Tobene asked. + +'Why, an ordinary compass points to the north, doesn't it? Well, a Flamp +compass points to the Flamp,' said the wren. 'Then you can find the +way.' + +'But where are we to get one?' was Tobene's very natural question. + +'The hedgehog makes them,' said the wren. 'On the other side of this +dell you will see a line of bushes. The hedgehog lives under the +fourteenth. Knock on the ground three times and he'll come out. Now I +must be off. Good-morning.' And with these words the fiery-crested wren +flitted away. + +At the fourteenth bush the children knocked three times on the ground. + +'Well?' said a surly voice. + +'Please we want a Flamp compass,' said Tilsa. + +At once the hedgehog appeared. 'I beg your pardon,' he said in softer +tones, 'but I mistook you for the rates and taxes, or I shouldn't have +spoke so short. I wasn't expecting customers so early. A Flamp compass? +Why, I don't think I have one in stock. You see, since the Flamps died +off, the demand has been so small that very few are made. There's my +own, which has been in the family for years, but I shouldn't care to +part with that except at a high price.' + +'How much would you call a high price, sir?' Tilsa inquired a little +anxiously. + +'Well, I couldn't let it go for anything less than a Ribston pippin, or +its value,' said the hedgehog. 'But I'm open to offers,' he continued. + +'Toby,' said Tilsa, 'turn out your pockets.' + +Tobene did so, and Tilsa examined the produce with a doubtful face. + +'Please, sir,' she said, 'would you like for the Flamp compass, which +you say is an old one, a piece of string, two marbles, some +toffee--although I'm afraid it's rather mixed up with string--eight +nuts, a screw, a peg-top, and a knife?' + +'The knife will be useful,' said Toby, who was looking on a little +ruefully, but convinced that Tilsa, as usual, was doing the right thing +and therefore must be supported, 'in case any one tries to snub you.' + +'Ah, you needn't trouble about that,' said the hedgehog. 'It's a +difficult matter to snub me. You see,' he added, 'by the nature of his +construction a hedgehog is not easily sat upon. But to business. +Considering that the times are hard, I don't mind accepting your offer, +miss.' + +So saying, to Tilsa's immense delight, the hedgehog retired under the +bush again, and came out carrying the Flamp compass. 'Is there anything +else I can do for you?' he asked. 'Any periwinkle brooms or mallow +cheeses this morning? We have a nice stock of thistle-clocks just in.' + +'No, thank you,' Tilsa replied as they hurried off. 'Nothing more +to-day. Good-morning.' + +The compass was neatly contrived of the cup of an acorn, through the +bottom of which ran a hedgehog's prickle. Balanced on the point was the +needle, a spear of dried grass, and over all was a spider's web to serve +as glass. + + + + +VIII + + +No matter how the Flamp compass was twisted, the needle pointed steadily +to the mountains before them, and the children marched bravely forward. +They were hungry and tired, but Tilsa would as soon have thought of +asking Tobene to carry her as of turning back. As for Tobene, he put one +foot before the other as firmly as he was able, and tried to forget the +loss of his treasures. + +The worst part of the journey was clambering over the hot rocks when the +mountains were reached, and the travellers did at last lose their +resolute cheerfulness, and had just sat down in the shade to have a good +cry, when they suddenly heard the sound of singing. Not exactly singing; +rather a melancholy droning, or chanting, as of a dirge. Listening +intently, they could make out these words: + + _I'm not in the least in love with life; + I might be, p'raps, if I had a wife + To care for me in a wifely way, + Or a neighbour or two to say good-day, + Or a chum + To come + And give me the news in a friendly talk, + Or share a duet or a meal or a walk. + But all alone in the world am I, + And I sit in a cave, + And try to behave + As a good Flamp should, with philosophy. + I shan't last long, for the cave is damp, + And nothing's so bad for a Flamp + As cramp...._ + +'It's the Flamp!' said both children together, fearfully. + +The chanting began again, and Tilsa and Tobene jumped up and, following +the sound of the voice, came to a wide and heavily-trodden path between +two rocks. They plodded along it until, rounding a crag, they perceived +immediately before them a yawning cave. Although the singer was out of +sight, the noise made by him was now almost overwhelming and so dismal +that the children were on the point of joining in the lamentation +themselves. + +A few steps more brought them in sight of the melancholy songster. +Seated in a corner of the cave, with his massive head on his fore-paws, +the picture of dejection, was the most enormous creature they had ever +seen or dreamed about. He was rather like an elephant, but much more +immense and without a trunk: a huge, ungainly, slate-coloured animal. + +He did not hear them, but sat rocking to and fro in his corner, moaning +lugubriously. + +'Toby,' said Tilsa, who now was not in the least alarmed, 'can you +cough?' + +'I'll try,' said Toby, and he coughed. + +The Flamp took down one paw from its desert of face and peered out. Then +he sprang to his feet and rubbed his heavy, watery, blue eyes in blank +astonishment. Tilsa and Tobene did not move. They stood still, gazing +into the Flamp's great, mournful face, now wrinkled up with surprise and +excitement. + +Then the Flamp spoke--'What?' he said, 'kids? Real kids? Flesh-and-blood +kids? Human, rollicking, kind-hearted kids?' + +'We are real children,' Tilsa replied at length, 'if that is what you +mean, and, oh, we are so glad to have found you! The hedgehog's compass +told us to come this way, or we should never have reached you at all.' + +'Then you set out intending to find me?' said the Flamp. 'Well, that is +a good one. How is it you're not scared, like all the rest of them?' + +'I don't know,' said Tilsa. 'I can't think. But we weren't, were we, +Toby?' + +'No,' said Tobene. + +'And what made you come?' the Flamp asked. + +'We--we--' Tilsa faltered. 'Well, sir, we thought you wanted sympathy, +like Alison did. And so we came to--to try and give you some.' + +'And so I do,' the Flamp gasped out. 'And so I do,' and he lifted up his +right paw, and brushed it across his eyes. 'You see, it's precious +little of it I get. It's very hard, I can assure you, my dears, to be +the last of one's race. Why, the land was full of Flamps once, and a +fellow need never be in want of company, but now--now they're all dead, +all but me, and I'm not long for this life.' The Flamp sighed and +dropped a tear, which splashed heavily. + +Tilsa felt very sorry. 'Poor--' she began to say, but stopped abruptly. +She was intending to say 'Poor Flamp,' but that now seemed to her too +familiar; so she altered it to 'Poor gentleman!' although when the word +was out, it seemed equally unsuitable. + +Tobene said nothing aloud, but nudged Tilsa and whispered, 'Aren't you +going to try throwing your arms round him, Tilsa? It's time, isn't it?' + +'Hush!' said Tilsa severely. + +The Flamp went on: 'And I doubt if any one is keener on company than I +am. Over in the city yonder, you know, they have a season called +Christmas, when every one is supposed to be friends with every one else; +and I thought to myself, That's the time for me. I won't ask for much, I +thought, but if just one night in the year they'll look pleased to see +me, and say, 'How do?' why I'll be very grateful to them and a deal +happier during the months that follow. It wasn't much to ask, was it? +But I suppose I didn't go to work the right way, or perhaps I had two +legs too many. Anyway, they misunderstood me: thought I'd come to do +them harm or something, and tried shooting me and poisoning me and +barricading themselves in. Wouldn't even give me a moment's sight of a +kid's face. I didn't try any other night. It seemed to me that if at a +season of goodwill they would behave like that, my chances at an +ordinary time would be less than nothing. But men can't understand +animals. Children can, though they're apt to grow out of it. Thank +goodness, there's _some_ children that stay childlike to the end, +however old they may be.' He brushed his paw across his eyes again. + +Soon he went on: 'So I've had to live alone, with no company but my own +voice. Maybe you heard me singing as you came. It wasn't much of a song, +I admit, for elegance of rhyme and metre don't seem to come easy, but a +song like that is more comfort than you'd believe.' He paused again. + +Then he turned radiantly to his visitors. 'And you've trudged all the +way from the city just to be kind to me, have you? Well, that is good of +you! Bless your hearts, no one knows how much a deed like that means. +Why, it's as good as smush even to know that any one is thinking of you +kindly, let alone doing things. I haven't felt so cheery and comfortable +for years. But you must be hungry. Now tell me what you would like to +eat and I'll try and get it for you, and afterwards you must tell me all +about yourselves.' + +Tilsa looked at Tobene, and Tobene at Tilsa. + +Then Tobene spoke to the Flamp for the first time. 'You said just now +that something was as good as smush. Please, what is smush? because if +it's something to eat, I should like that.' + +The Flamp laughed all over: 'Splendid,' he cried, 'splendid! Something +to eat? I should rather think it is. You couldn't have made a better +choice. You shall have smush. Sit down here while I get it ready.' + +Tilsa and Tobene sat down, and the Flamp retreated farther into the +cave. There was a noise of pots and pans. + +'Isn't he a whopper?' said Tobene. + +'Tremendous,' said Tilsa. 'And what a dear old thing!' + +'Yes,' Tobene continued, 'and what a set of donkeys those people at Ule +have been all these years. Why, he's as jolly as Alison, in a different +way. Do you think he'll give us a ride, Tilsa?' + +'Of course he will,' said a deep voice above them. 'But you must eat +some smush first,' and looking up, they saw the Flamp on his hind legs, +towering into the roof of the cave, and in his paws a large dish and +some plates and spoons. 'Now then,' he said, 'eat as much as you can.' + +(All that the historian can do towards a description of smush is to say +that its colour is pink, and its taste quite indescribable but blessed +in the highest degree. When asked about it afterwards, Tilsa and Tobene, +even to their old age, would become purple and inarticulate with +enthusiasm. Perhaps if each of you thinks of all the most delicious +things you have ever eaten, you will come a little nearer to an idea of +what smush is like.) + +After they had finished, Tilsa told the Flamp all about herself, and +Tobene, and old Alison, and her grandfather the Liglid of Ule. + +'I expect,' she said, 'they are looking for us now. And I think, sir, if +you don't mind, it would be better if you were to go back with us, and +then we could let everybody see how kind and gentle you are, and +grandpapa won't go on trying to circumvent you.' + +'Circumvent?' said the Flamp. 'What's that?' + +'I don't know what it means,' said Tilsa, 'except that it's something +horrid. And someone named Bill's going to do it.' + +'All right,' said the Flamp, 'we will go back together, and the sooner +the better, I think, or that dear old Alison of yours will be nervous. +Although I should like to keep you here, you know. But you'll promise to +come again, won't you, and stay a long time?' + +'O yes,' cried Tilsa and Tobene together, 'we should just think we +will!' + + + + +IX + + +That night the two children slept soundly in a corner of the cave, while +the Flamp sat by and watched them. In the morning, after a breakfast of +smush, they climbed on the monster's back and started for the city at a +good swinging pace. + +'It was like riding on a cloud,' said Tobene afterwards: 'so high up.' + +They were well within sight of Ule when--'Look,' said Tobene suddenly, +pointing in the direction of a speck on the white road, 'what's that?' + +'It moves,' said Tilsa. 'It's a person.' + +'We'll soon see what it is,' the Flamp grunted, lengthening his stride. +The earth shook as his feet beat upon it. + +As they came nearer and nearer, the children saw that the object was a +woman. For a moment she stood upright, looking all ways at once as +though panic-stricken, and then she suddenly unfurled a green umbrella +and sank behind it. + +'Why, it's Alison,' cried Tobene. 'Hurrah!' + +'Stop, stop!' cried Tilsa to the Flamp. 'Please don't frighten dear old +Alison. Let us go down and run to her.' + +The Flamp at once stopped and lay on his side, and the children slipped +to the ground and scampered as fast as they could towards their nurse. +The umbrella did not move. As they drew close they heard the old lady's +voice in beseeching tones: 'Please, Mr. Flamp, they're the sweetest +children in the world, and if you've swallowed them, you mountaineous +wretch you, you may as well swallow me too, for all there's left for me +to live for! Besides, I'm their nurse, and I might be useful to them +down inside. Ooh! Ooh! Please, Mr. Flamp, they're the sweetest children +in the world, and if you've swallowed them, you mountaineous wretch you, +you----' + +'Alison, dear, it's all right,' Tilsa interrupted, skipping up and +pushing the umbrella aside. 'We're as safe and happy as ever we were.' + +Alison stared first at one and then at the other of her truant charges. +Then--'Well?' she almost screamed, 'is it really you, my dearies?' + +'Really!' exclaimed both children at once, and there was such hugging as +the plain of Ule had never before seen. + +Soon Alison furled her umbrella and pointed to the Flamp, who was +smiling and chuckling and soliloquising in the distance. + +('It's as good as smush to see this,' he was saying.) + +'Is that him?' Alison inquired. + +'Yes,' said Tilsa, 'and he's such a dear, you can't think.' + +'Yes, come along and be introduced,' said Tobene, and without a word +Alison went, being quite assured that if the creature had not harmed her +two pets it would not harm her. + +'Mr. Flamp,' said Tobene, 'I want to introduce you to this lady, our +nurse Alison. She's the best nurse in the world. You ought to get her to +tuck you up at night.' + +'Tuck _me_ up?' cried the Flamp, and--'Tuck _that_ up?' cried Alison, +both together, and they all laughed, and at once Alison was at home and +comfortable. + +They went forward to the city, chatting gaily, but when the wall was +reached, the gates were found to be barricaded. No sound of life was +audible, no moving thing to be seen. + +'As I expected,' said the Flamp sadly. 'They heard me coming, and as +usual have locked themselves in. What's to be done?' + +'The best course,' remarked old Alison, who was always a wonderful +manager, whether with the cold mutton or a child in a temper, 'the best +course is to wait. You lie down here, Mr. Flamp, and make as little +noise breathing as you can; and you, Tilsa, darling, take this pencil +and paper and write a note to your grandfather, to be slipped under the +gate. They'll venture out soon and find it.' + +The Flamp and Tilsa did as they were bid. This was Tilsa's note to the +Liglid:-- + + 'MY DEAR GRANDPAPA--There is no need to be frightened. Alison and + Toby and me are just outside the gates all safe with the Flamp, who + is really and truly the sweetest creature you ever saw. He doesn't + want to hurt this city at all, he only wants simpithy like I said + he did. If you open the gate and tell the people this you can see + for yourself how kind and gentle he is, and that there isn't any + need of sircumventing him. So please open the gate quickly. Your + affectionate grandchild, + + TILSA. + +The paper was folded and addressed to 'His Excellency the Liglid of +Ule,' and Tobene slipped it under the gate. Then the little party sat +down to wait. Old Alison took out her knitting, and as she worked, told +the others of her adventures in search of them. 'I had to come alone,' +she said: 'every one else was frightened.' + + + + +X + + +One hour passed, two hours, three hours, and then a flag of truce +appeared above the ramparts. + +'Here, Mr. Flamp,' said Alison, 'get up and wave this in reply'; and she +gave her handkerchief to the Flamp. + +He mounted slowly on his hind feet, and, stepping to the wall, waved the +handkerchief over it. A few minutes went by, and then the Liglid's +scared face appeared at a loophole. Seeing Tilsa, Tobene, and Alison +sitting comfortably in the shade cast by the Flamp's huge body, he +seemed to be reassured. + +'Alison,' he called out, 'are those really the children?' + +'No doubt of it, sir,' said Alison. + +'Then wait a little longer,' said the Liglid as he vanished. + +He went at once to the Council Chamber and summoned a meeting of the +wise men of Ule. 'Apparently,' he said, 'we have misjudged this creature +for many years; but our duty now is simple: to draw up as quickly as may +be an address of welcome to our eccentric visitor.' + +An hour later, a procession of the men of eminence of the city, followed +by the inhabitants, marched along the streets to the northern gate. At +the Liglid's word of command, the barricades were removed and the gate +flung open. + +Tilsa and Tobene at once ran to their grandfather and kissed him, while +Alison dropped a curtsey. The Flamp stood up and bowed as gracefully as +he could, and the Liglid returned the salute, not without some shaking +in the knees. + +In faltering tones, which afterwards grew more steady, he begged of the +Flamp the 'honour of his attention for a few moments,' and forthwith +read the address of welcome. It was flowery and extravagant in style, +and contained not a few statements which sent a spasm across the Flamp's +wide expanse of face, such as might be caused by an attempt to suppress +laughter. + +At the end, the Flamp bowed again and laid a massive paw upon his heart. +Then he replied. He began by thanking the Liglid for his kind welcome, +continued with the expression of his determination to do in the future +all that he could for the good of the city, and ended with a eulogy of +Tilsa and Tobene. + +'They are, if I may use the word,' he said feelingly, 'kids which any +city should be proud of. And to be the grandfather of such bricks ought +to be as good as smush and a perpetual delight. And their nurse, ma'am +Alison here, is an old lady as is worthy of them.' + +The crowd cheered these remarks again and again, and Tilsa and Tobene, +who were not accustomed to such publicity, hardly knew where to look. As +for old Alison, she curtseyed and went on with her knitting. 'Children,' +she said to herself, 'that travel in search of Flamps wear out their +stockings. Flattery or no flattery, new stockings must be made.' + +Other speeches followed, for Ule was famous for its oratory, the best +being from a young statesman who made the admirable suggestion that in +commemoration of this auspicious day, a new order of merit should be +established, called the Order of the Friends of the Flamp, membership to +be conferred upon all persons conspicuous for spontaneous acts of +kindness. Further, he proposed that the first persons to add the letters +F.F., signifying Friend of the Flamp, to their names, should be Tilsa, +Tobene, and old Alison. The project was received with the wildest +enthusiasm, and the order was then and there founded. And to the end of +the history of Ule, no honour was esteemed more highly by the citizens +than the simple affix F.F. + +The formal part of the proceedings being finished, the Liglid proclaimed +the day a general holiday and in the name of the city invited the Flamp +to a grand banquet. Afterwards came sports of all kinds on the plain, in +which the Flamp took part, carrying enormous loads of children up and +down at a hand gallop, until the Commissioner of Works begged him to +move more slowly, owing to the danger caused to the public buildings of +Ule by the tremor of the earth. Never in the memory of the oldest +inhabitant had such a day of jollification and excitement been spent. + +Of course the Flamp was the chief attraction, but Tilsa and Tobene and +old Alison were very considerable lions too, and a hundred times they +told the story of their adventures. Presuming on his relationship to the +explorers, the Liglid, it must be confessed, endeavoured to take to +himself some credit for the proceedings, but it is doubtful if he was +believed. + +One worthy deed, however, he did perform: he publicly burned the Bill +for the Circumvention of the Flamp, amid deafening applause. + +At last, late in the evening, the Flamp said good-bye, promising to come +again soon, and swung off across the plain, the people waving farewell +to him from the city wall. And as he moved along, he chanted to himself +a new song, which, although not much better in rhyme and metre, was +vastly more cheerful than his old dirge. This was the first line of it: + + '_O life, I think, is a jolly good thing._' + + + + +XI + + +There is no space to tell a thousandth part of the benefits conferred by +the Flamp upon the city which once had used him so ill. Suffice it to +say, that henceforward the Flamp became the guardian of Ule. + +A line of communication was set up between his cave and the city, and +when wanted he was signalled for; then at a rush he would cross the +plain, ready for any duty. + +He helped the people of Ule in countless ways, from overwhelming the +attacking force of the King of Unna, without the loss of a single man in +the defending army, to lying on the plain in the heat of summer and +casting a shadow in which picnic parties might have lunch. + +Sometimes the Flamp came when the signal had not been set in motion; and +then it was known that he was again in need of sympathy, and the +children of the city, headed by Tilsa and Tobene, would run out into the +plain to meet him and join in a game, or if it was at night, and he came +within the walls, the house-holders would join in the song of welcome +which the Poet Laureate of Ule had written for such occasions. And soon +the Flamp would return to the mountains happy again. + +The Christmas following the Understanding of the Flamp (as the +establishment of these new relations was called) was a time of good +fellowship, such as no Ulian had dreamed to be possible. Christmas at +last really was Christmas. The Flamp as of old came down at evening, but +this year no doors were barred, no blinds were drawn; instead he passed +from house to house throughout the city, looking in at the upper windows +and receiving a welcome at each, and sometimes a piece of plum-cake, +sometimes a packet of sweets, all of which passed down his huge red +throat. Is it necessary to say that his longest stay was at the nursery +window of the Liglid's house? + +In fact Tilsa and Tobene, as you may imagine, were always the Flamp's +favourites, and every summer it was they, and they alone, who were +honoured by an invitation to stay for a fortnight in the Blue Mountains, +where they had such a holiday as falls to the lot of few children. + +So did Ule, under the Flampian influence, become one of the happiest +spots in the world, and strangers poured into the city every day to +learn the secret of contentment. + + + + +The Ameliorator + + _TO "EVERSLEY" AND ALL WITHIN IT_ + + + + +I + +THE CITY OF BIRDS + + +Once upon a time there was a city where the good people were under the +protection of singing-birds of all kinds: nightingales, thrushes, +blackbirds, robins, chaffinches, linnets. As you passed through the +streets the song of one at least of these little fellows was certain to +strike pleasantly on the ear; for they would perch on the window-sills, +or in the branches of the trees before the houses, and fling out their +glad notes. + +No money could buy the birds. It mattered not how rich a man was, if he +were not merry at heart no bird's voice could be his to gladden the +hours with song. + +Fugitives fleeing across the wide plain at night would, once within the +gates of the city, pause a moment with raised finger, listening +breathlessly. Then the still air would be filled with beautiful, +consoling music, and 'Hark,' they would say, 'the nightingale! A good +man lives close by. Let us knock and ask protection.' And travellers +hearing a blackbird whistling gaily before a hostelry would know that +within doors was brave cheer and jocund company. + +Most of the children in the city had each a bird friend, and it was a +sad day when the wings spread and the songster flew away, for that meant +that in the heart of the child all was not well. Always, however, when +the smiles came back, back came also the little feathered companion. + + + + +II + +THE FOUR CHILDREN + + +Now this story is about four children in the city who were friends of +the birds: Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline. They were for the most +part good children, but now and again they made up their little minds +that they knew better than anybody else what was the best thing for +them; and as it generally happened that their elders refused to take the +same view, there came occasionally into their lives intervals of +unhappiness when the whole world was most plainly doing its best to +spoil their fun and treat them altogether badly. At least so it seemed +in the eyes of Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline. + +And to those who had the care of Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline, it +was apparent one Monday evening that such an interval was about to +begin. Bertram's governess had the greatest difficulty in persuading +that all-knowing boy that lessons were in the least desirable; Beryl's +mother having refused to buy her a new doll, and thus bring her store of +dolls from fifteen to sixteen, could induce Beryl to fall in with no +plans whatever; and the barometers of Bobus and Aline were unmistakably +at 'Set Sulks,' because they too wanted something which was not good for +them. Thus, one Monday evening, was it with Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and +Aline. + + + + +III + +THE NEW HOUSE + + +On the Tuesday morning that followed, the inhabitants of the City of +Birds, when they came downstairs and began the business of the day, were +astonished to find a new shop in the Market Square; astonished, because +no one could remember either what the house was like before, or who had +then lived in it, or indeed that there had been a house there at +all--not even the house-agent, who felt more than a little annoyed in +consequence, deeming himself defrauded of his just fees. + +There, however, stood the house, leaving no room for doubt as to its +existence. There it stood, spick and span, with white window-curtains +tied up with red ribbons, and rows of flower-pots on the sills, and a +shining brass handle and knocker on the door, and a dark blind in the +shop window through which, howsoever noses might be flattened against +the glass, nothing could be seen. Hanging out over the pavement was a +quaint sign-board bearing the words + + 'THE AMELIORATOR.' + +And, to crown all, in the branches of the silver birch before the house +a thrush was singing, while the swallows were already busy under the +gable. + + + + +IV + +THE BUSINESS CARD + + +At seven o'clock on the same morning, Bertram awoke. Had any observers +been present they would have seen him turn over in bed, push his fists +into the air and fight the sunshine which was streaming through the +window, and then open his eyes and begin to remember where he was. Then +they might have seen him yawn to a greater extent than so small a boy +would seem to be capable of. It was when Bertram's waking operations had +reached this stage that he remembered what had happened last night: he +had been naughty and had gone to bed early in consequence. But he wasn't +in the least sorry for it, not he, and his governess was a beast. These +were his sentiments as he began to dress. 'I shan't wash this morning,' +he said to himself, 'just to spite them.' + +It was just as he was turning to leave the room that Bertram caught +sight of something white on the floor underneath the window. Picking it +up, he saw that it was a card--a business card--which certainly was not +there last night. 'It must have blown in,' he thought, and forthwith +began to read it. This is what he read:-- + + THE AMELIORATOR + + begs to inform the Children of the City + of Birds that he has set up in Business + in their midst, and is ready (although not + eager) for their custom. + + SAD FACES BRIGHTENED WITH THE UTMOST DESPATCH. + TEARS DRIED. DISAPPOINTMENTS RELIEVED. + SORROWS TURNED TO PLEASURES. + BAD GOVERNESSES PUNISHED. + HARD LESSONS MADE EASY. + UNREASONABLE PARENTS BROUGHT TO THEIR SENSES. + TEMPER REPAIRING IN ALL ITS BRANCHES. + + _Business Hours_--When you wish. + + TERMS EASY. + + THE AMELIORATOR, + Market Square, + City of Birds. + +The words seemed to Bertram too good to be true, and he read them again +slowly. '"Sad faces brightened with the utmost despatch." "Tears dried." +That's for girls of course,' he remarked (but why he was so emphatic it +is difficult to say, since it was only last night that----but that's of +no importance). '"Bad governesses punished." Hooroo! "Hard lessons made +easy." Now this,' said Bertram, 'is the right kind of fellow, this +A-M-E-L-I-O-R-A-T-O-R, this Ameliorator!' and so saying, he pushed the +card into his pocket and looked out of the window to whistle +good-morning to his robin. But the bird was not there. His face fell +again. 'Pooh,' he said, 'they're all against me now, but I don't care,' +and as he walked downstairs to breakfast, he made up his mind to be +thoroughly fractious. + + + + +V + +THE CROSS-GRAINED MORNING + + +In the City of Birds there were several large green gardens set aside +for children. These gardens were the finest places in the world in which +to play hide-and-seek, because of the summer-houses and grottoes and +winding paths; also there were ponds to sail boats on, and trees to +climb, and caves for robbers, and a little circle of wet grass in the +midst of rhododendron bushes for fairies to plot and plan in; and for +very hot afternoons a soft bank where you could lie in the shade of a +cedar which seemed to bless the earth with its broad hands. + +Every morning after lessons the four children used to meet in one of +these gardens and play till dinner-time. Sometimes they would play +cricket until they were too tired to run another yard, and then lean +over the rim of the fountain and watch the goldfish gliding silently +through the water, or they would sail their boats on the pond, or join +in the marriage ceremonies of two of the blue ants that lived in the +bark of the cedar. There was always plenty of excitement at a blue ant's +wedding, on account of the bad behaviour of the company. The bridegroom +had a way of ignoring the solemnity of the occasion and trying to walk +to church with one of the bridesmaids, or even the bride's mother, while +sometimes the bride would forget all about her duties, and leave the +procession in order to pick up and stagger away with a ridiculous piece +of wood which she could not possibly really need. Very often the bride +had to be changed as often as six times before the church was reached, +where Bertram, who always insisted on being the clergy-man, was waiting +to perform the service. Ants, it must be confessed, are not good at +games: they are too busy, or, as Bertram put it, too selfish. Neither +are wood-lice. Just at important moments wood-lice turn sulky and roll +themselves into little balls. Worms are most trust-worthy, although +never eager for sensible play; but worms are slimy, and Beryl always +refused to touch them. Spiders, too, have a way of getting down one's +neck. Perhaps frogs are best of all. Frogs are quite satisfactory; they +always jump when you touch them up. Toads, on the other hand, are sulky; +but their eyes are good to look into. + +On this particular morning, Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline met as +usual, but for some reason or other they found it impossible to have a +really good game; whatever they tried appeared flat and tiresome. They +began with cricket and were fairly successful until Bobus hit the ball +into the pond, where it immediately sank. Hitherto it always had +floated. Cricket, therefore, was over. Hide-and-seek took its place and +was going pretty well until Aline fell and hurt her knee. So no more +hide-and-seek. They tried the blue ants, and then the lizards that lived +under the leaves in the violet bed; but met with nothing but +unsociableness. The ants were quite nasty at being interfered with, and +one of them crawled up Beryl's arm. + +At last the children made up their minds to try no longer, and instead +they lay on their backs on the grass and grumbled. It was clear that the +world was against them, and what is the good of fighting in the face of +such opposition? Bertram began the grumbling. 'Old Tabby,' he +said,--that being the way in which he spoke of Miss Tabitha, his +governess,--'is a beast. She makes me learn heaps of things which nobody +can ever need to know.' + +'And I mayn't have a new doll,' said Beryl. + +'And I mayn't stay up later than eight,' said Bobus. + +'And I mayn't eat cake until I've had three pieces of horrid bread and +butter,' said Aline. + +'It's a shame,' said all. + +'Yes,' Bertram went on, 'and my robin wasn't singing this morning.' + +'No more was my linnet,' said Beryl. + +'No more was my chaffinch,' said Bobus. + +'And no more was my blackbird,' said Aline. + +'It's a shame,' said Bertram again; 'everything's against us. Except,' +he added, pulling the card from his pocket, 'except the +Amel--Amelior--except the Ameliorator.' + +'Why, have you got one too?' Aline asked, producing a card exactly like +it, and as she did so Beryl and Bobus also each showed one. On comparing +notes it seemed that all the cards had come in the night in the same +mysterious way. + +The four children looked at each other in silence. They all wanted to +say the same thing, but no one wished to be first. Bertram, as usual, +took the lead: 'Let's go and see the Am--what-d'ye-call-him,' he said. + + + + +VI + +THE LITTLE OLD MAN + + +A few minutes later the children stood hand in hand before the new shop +in the Market Square, and as they did so they suddenly discovered that +their wounded hearts were well again, just as you find that the tooth +stops aching at the moment you reach the dentist's doorstep. They might +even then have run home again, had not Bertram, feeling a little +doubtful of the cure and more than a little inquisitive, peeped into the +shop. + +'Come in, Bertram,' said a blithe voice, 'I've been expecting you all +the morning'; and before he and his companions knew where they were the +door was shut, the four children were inside it, each in a comfortable +chair, and in front of them was absolutely the pleasantest little old +man they had ever seen. + +He had a smooth, ruddy face, and white hair, and large round spectacles +behind which his eyes danced and sparkled, and a comical kindly mouth, +and his clothes were of bright colours that merged into each other as +easily as those of the rainbow and were as certain a sign that the sun +was shining somewhere. Moreover there was in his appearance a vague but +unmistakable likeness to the one person of all persons whom Bertram +loved best, and to the one whom Beryl loved best, and to the one whom +little Aline loved best, and to the one whom Bobus loved best. Yes, it +was very strange, but although all these people were totally different +there was something about the little old man that bore resemblance to +each of them. + + + + +VII + +THE STOCK IN TRADE + + +When the children summoned up enough courage to look round, they saw +that the shop was stocked with drawers and bottles and had quite a +business-like appearance. One bottle was labelled 'Mixture for Sulks,' +and another, 'Bad Temper Lotion.' Then there were 'Cross-patch Powders' +and 'Pills against Meddling.' In a prominent place Beryl saw two tall +flasks, one almost full of water and the other almost empty, and the +water in the one that was nearly full was thick and muddy, but that in +the second was clear as crystal. The flask that was nearly full was +lettered 'Tears Shed for Ourselves,' and the other, 'Tears Shed for +Others.' But also there were pleasanter things than these: there were +cupboards full of sweets, shelves of picture books and fairy stories, +and a great store of toys. Also there were many drawers, labelled +encouragingly, 'Rewards for Good Humour,' 'Prizes for Hard Work,' +'Prizes for Hard Play,' 'Presents for Anticipating Wishes,' 'Gifts for +Forgetting Number One,' and so on. + +It took only a short time to see these things, and meanwhile the little +old man was standing in front of the fire, beaming merrily. Then, when +all four had taken a good look, and were feeling rather bad in +consequence, for they could not feel entitled to much beyond pills and +powders, he led them into the inner room--his consulting-room he called +it--saying, 'Come along, little sorrowful ones, and we will inquire into +the great trouble.' And at once they had some difficulty in remembering +their grievance at all, although an hour ago it had seemed to fill the +whole landscape. + + + + +VIII + +THE ADVICE + + +'Now,' said the Ameliorator, when they were all comfortably inside the +inner room, 'I want to tell you about some of my friends. "Ladies first" +is a good rule: let me tell you about a little girl I once knew,'--here +he laid his hand on Beryl's head--'who had just such soft hair as this, +and just such a gloomy little face.' Here Beryl smiled, in spite of +herself. 'Yes,' added the Ameliorator, 'and just such a smile now and +then. And what do you think the trouble was? Why, although she had no +fewer than fifteen dolls, all given to her by thoughtful friends, she +wanted a new one. These fifteen dolls were very good ones, especially +the faithful old Arthur John, a wooden gentleman of strong affections +and no nose worth mentioning, yet nothing would do but she must have an +aristocratic pink wax lady in white muslin, that hung in a certain shop +window and stared hard all day at the little ragamuffins who pressed +their faces against the pane and said, "O my, ain't she a beauty!" Why +the little girl wanted her I could never understand, because she had no +expression at all, and my young friend had a brother who had declared +that if any more "sappy wax dummies" were brought into the house, he +would put them to bed in the oven. Still, in spite of this terrible +threat, she did want her, and in her despair she came to me about it. + +'Well,' added the Ameliorator, 'what do you think I did? I made her sit +down by this very table, and I opened this very drawer, and I took out +these very pictures, and as I showed them to her' (here he began to lay +before the bewildered Beryl picture after picture of ragged street +children) 'I told her how these little wretches were forced to run about +all day in the gutters, whether it was wet or fine, cold or warm, +because they had no nurseries, and how they could get very little to +eat, and how the only toys they had were bits of wood and old bottles. +And then and there I made so bold as to suggest to my discontented +friend--who of course had every reason to be unhappy, when her mother, +who already had given her so many nice things, refused to buy her an +expensive doll--that if she were not only to stop wishing for any more +new toys, but were to send a few of those she already had to be given +away to some of these children who had none, why I fancied she would not +be altogether miserable any longer. That is what I told her to do, and +that is what she did, and I believe I may truthfully say it was a +wonderful cure. + +'Then--let me see--yes,' the Ameliorator continued more briskly, 'then +there was a boy, or--shall I say, a little man?--who once consulted me. +The difficulty, if I remember rightly, was intellectual. O yes!--he was +convinced that he, being a wise patriarch of eight or nine, knew more +than the lady engaged by his parents to teach him. So he applied to her +a not very respectful nickname and refused to learn the lessons that she +set him, and swaggered about calling her a beast, which is not the right +attitude of a gentleman (although old enough to know everything) towards +a lady, and made himself as unpleasant as he could. + +'By some chance, one of my cards fell into his hands: he read it and was +fascinated by the words, "Bad governesses punished." He came to me to +arrange for the punishment. The best way, I told him, is shocks. There +is nothing like a shock to bring a governess to her senses. "Now, what +is the last thing in the world your governess expects from you?" I +asked. "Why, that you will learn a lesson of your own accord, without +constant jogs from her." So that if he were to do this, I told him, he +would give her a severe shock, and thus punish her. + +'He went away delighted with the plan. Morning after morning he appeared +in the schoolroom with his task all prepared, and every morning the +governess received a new shock. And when I peeped through the window not +long after, there they sat, close together, she happy after her +punishment, and he happy because (only he didn't know this) he had made +her so. For she was unhappy before--very; but young fellows with exalted +ideas on their own judgment and knowledge have no time to observe the +unhappiness of their governesses or parents, have they, Bertram?' + +Bertram did not answer: this shock system of punishment was new to him. +He felt muddled, but he began to think he would try it. He was not, +however, quite in a condition to see the Ameliorator clearly. + +'And little Bobus doesn't like going to bed?' the Ameliorator asked, +turning to Bobus. 'My dear sir, it can be made the best thing in the +world. Let me tell you how to make it so. Directly you get into bed, +begin to think what pleasant little surprise you can give some one on +the next day: any one, mother or father, cousin or playmate, nurse or +beggar in the street. You will find this such an exciting game that you +will run to bed eagerly when the time comes, and, what is more, it makes +you readier to get up. At any rate, Bobus, try it. + +'And little Aline,' the Ameliorator went on, taking Aline's hand and +beaming down upon her with his kindly eyes, which danced more than ever +behind his round spectacles, 'little Aline prefers cake to bread and +butter! Dear, dear, this is very sad. If she eats three pieces of bread +and butter she may have cake, but not till then. Well, I think I should +advise her to eat those three pieces. Little girls who eat only cake +grow up to be weedy and weak, and unable to do half the good things of +life: they can't skate, and they can't dance, and they can't play games. +So I should advise Aline to eat the bread and butter.' + + + + +IX + +THE TOKENS + + +'Now,' said the little old man, 'you must run home or you'll be late for +dinner. But first let me find some little token of our conversation for +each,' and so saying, he went to the drawer labelled 'Prizes for Hard +Work,' and found something for Bertram; and to the drawer labelled +'Gifts for Forgetting Number One,' and found something for Beryl; and to +the drawer labelled 'Presents for Anticipating Wishes,' and found +something for Bobus; and to the drawer labelled 'Rewards for Hard Play,' +and found something for Aline. + +'Now, good-bye,' said he, holding open the door. + +But Bertram, who was always the leader, did not move. He seemed still to +have something on his mind. + +'No, no,' said the Ameliorator, who was a wonderful thought-reader, 'no, +no, there is nothing to pay. Why, I have had the pleasure of your +company for a whole hour! That's payment enough for any one. Now run +along.' + +'But,' Bertram faltered, still not moving, 'I haven't earned the "Prize +for Hard Work."' + +'No,' said each of the others, 'I haven't earned mine either.' + +'Ah!' said the Ameliorator, 'but you are going to.' + + + + +X + +THE RETURN + + +Hand in hand, silently, the four children walked through the city. And +when each one reached home, there, in the branches of the tree before +the house, was its bird in full song. + + + + +The Schoolboy's Apprentice + + _TO L. F. G._ + + +Once upon a time there was a schoolboy called Chimp. Chimp was not his +name: his name was Alexander Joseph Chemmle. Chimp was short for +chimpanzee, an animal which his schoolfellows agreed that he was like. + +Chimp usually spent his holidays in his uncle's family; but one summer +he travelled on a visit to his father, who was British Consul in a +foreign port, so far away that the boy had only a few days at home +before it was time again to join the steamer for England. + +Chimp, who was always adventurous, had been at sea for only a week on +the return journey, when one evening at dusk he lost his hold as he was +clambering out to the end of the main crosstrees, and fell overboard. +The other passengers were listening to a concert in the saloon +('screeching' Chimp had called it, when he took refuge in the chief +engineer's room), and, work being over, the crew were for'ard smoking, +so that there was no one except the first officer and the man at the +wheel to hear the shout that Chimp sent up from the water. As a matter +of fact both men heard it, but it caused them to do no more than say to +themselves at the same moment, 'There's that boy again! Up to some +mischief, I'll be bound.' No help, therefore, came to Chimp. The great +black ship glided by, the screw threshed the water into blinding foam, +and when he could see and think again, Chimp was alone in the ocean. + +Chimp was a good swimmer. He struck out at once vigorously in the +direction of the island which they had passed at sundown. The sea was as +smooth as a pond and quite warm, and after several minutes had passed, +the boy turned over on his back and floated comfortably, moving his arms +just enough to give him an impetus towards the shore. Although he was +upset by the accident which had so suddenly substituted the water for +the ship (and it was nearing supper time, and there were always ices for +supper!), Chimp was not a boy at all given to fear, and he could think +of his new plight with composure. His first calm thought was regret for +the mongoose which he was taking back to school, 'although,' as he said +to himself, 'the chances are, Porker wouldn't let me keep it,' Porker +being the way in which Chimp spoke of Dr. Cyril Bigley Plowden, +Principal of Witherson College. His second feeling was keenness to play +Robinson Crusoe in earnest. Chimp and other boys had often on +half-holidays made believe that an island in the river was Juan +Fernandez, but the game usually began with one fight to decide who +should be Robinson, and ended with another to check the arrogance of +Friday. Now, however, he was but an hour or so from an uninhabited +island (of course it was uninhabited) and bothered by no rival for chief +honours. He decided that to fall into the sea from a steamer at night +was a lark. But a little while afterwards he thought of sharks and +remembered, with something of a pang, good times in England; then he +wondered what would happen on the ship when they missed him; then he +glowed at the anticipation of the other boys' envy when they learned +where he had been; then he thought of sharks again; and then his feet +touched the bottom. + +When Chimp at last crawled out of the water, he was nigh dead beat. In +the soft still light which the moon poured down he could see beyond the +beach a dark strip which seemed to promise a bed. He staggered blindly +over the stones to this refuge, found that it was grass, and, sinking +upon it, was in a moment asleep. + +The sun was high and hot when Chimp awoke. For a moment he looked around +him bewildered, wondering why the dream would not finish: then he +remembered everything. At the same moment he was conscious, as he +afterwards expressed it, that he had had nothing to eat for a hundred +years. Chimp stood up, yawned the stiffness out of his bones, and set +forth to seek for food and claim his kingdom. He made at once for the +highest ground and gathered the island in a bird's-eye view. It seemed +to be about eight miles long and three broad, mainly rock, bare and red +as a brick. There were a few trees and some wide patches of rank grass. +Not a sign of human life was to be seen, but swift green lizards shot +across the ground at Chimp's feet, a million grasshoppers shrilled into +his ears, and white gulls with cruel eyes hovered and wheeled above him. +The prospect did not cheer Robinson Crusoe II., but he set out for the +interior of the island, searching every miniature valley for a spring, +every tree and shrub for fruit. But he sought in vain. Then recollecting +stories of the toothsomeness of turtles' eggs baked in the sand, Chimp +turned to the shore again and explored the coast. At the end of three +hours he said disgustedly, 'What a liar Ballantyne was!' and was just +sinking down exhausted, when his heart gave a big _plump!_ and stood +still, for there before him was a well-trodden path. + +At first, hungry as he was, Chimp's feeling was grief at the discovery +that after all the island was not uninhabited, but his regret soon faded +before the anticipation of the meal he would devour in the abode to +which the pathway led, and he struck into it with new vigour, taking the +inland direction. The path rose with every step. At last, a mile or so +from the sea, it turned abruptly round a boulder, and Chimp suddenly +found himself in the presence of an elderly man with a long grey beard, +who was sitting at a table in the entrance of a cave, writing. + +The meeting seemed to be the most unexpected thing that had ever +happened to either of them, for the elderly man rose with a start that +upset both ink and table, and Chimp caught himself looking round for +something to cling to for support. Not finding anything, he sat down on +the ground and stared at the elderly man. He would have liked to have +gone forward to pick up the ink-bottle, but dared not, on account of a +peculiar feeling in his knees. Meanwhile the elderly man stared at the +boy, and Chimp wondered if he ever would speak, and if it would be in +English when he did. After a long pause the elderly man picked up the +ink. Then looking at Chimp still more curiously through his spectacles, +he spoke. + +'What are you?' he asked, in good English. + +'My name,' said Chimp, 'is Alexander Joseph Chemmle.' + +'No, no,' the elderly man replied, 'I mean, what are you--what? Not a +boy, are you? Not really and truly a boy! Oh say, say you are a boy!' + +'Yes,' said Chimp, although for the moment, so intense and unreasonable +was the other's excitement about the matter, he almost doubted it. 'Yes, +I'm a boy.' + +'A boy! a boy!' the elderly man exclaimed joyfully. 'Eureka!' Then he +grew calmer, and continued: 'Dear me, this is very interesting. A most +fortunate chance! A boy, you say. How extremely happy an accident. Now +what kind of boy might you be?' + +Chimp was puzzled. 'I suppose,' he thought, 'I ought to call myself a +good boy, and yet that isn't exactly how Porker would describe me. And +what is more, good boys are such saps.' Then he spoke aloud: 'Well, sir, +I'm a fairish specimen of a boy, I think.' + +'Good!' said the elderly man. 'Good! An average boy. So much the better. +And what does it feel like to be a boy?' + +'Whew!' said Chimp to himself, 'I came for breakfast, and all I seem to +be getting is an exam.' However, he did his best to answer the question. +'Why, sir,' he said aloud, 'as long as you don't get too many lines and +swishings, it feels good to be a boy. But swishing makes it feel bad +sometimes.' + +'Lines?' inquired the other. 'Swishings? What are they?' + +'Why,' said Chimp, 'when Porker canes you, that's swishing, and lines +are passages from Virgil which you have to copy out if you make +howlers--I mean, if you make mistakes.' + +'Yes, yes,' said the elderly man, a little vaguely. 'And so it's good to +be a boy?' he added. + +A happy thought struck Chimp. 'It is good,' he replied; 'but there are +other times when it's bad, besides those I mentioned. When--when you're +hungry, for instance.' + +'Ah!' exclaimed the elderly man, rising from the table. 'I was +forgetting. You must pardon me, Alexander Joseph Chemmle. I have, I +fear, nothing to offer you but biscuits and tinned meats. Do you care +for tinned meats? I keep most kinds.' + +'I like bloater paste,' Chimp said. 'I always take a pot or two back to +school.' + +'Ah!' cried his host eagerly, 'you like bloater paste best? That's +famous! So do I. A community of taste!' + +He disappeared into the cave, and in a minute or so came forth again, +bearing the bloater paste and a plate in one hand, and the biscuits and +a knife in the other. 'Now,' he said, 'fall to, and while you are eating +these I must try to find something else. Tinned pears--do you like +them?' + +Chimp mumbled that he did. He was eating with more enjoyment than he +ever had eaten in his life. Ambrosia was nothing to bloater paste. + +'It is wonderful--our tastes coincide in everything,' said the elderly +man as he entered the cave again. He returned with a tin of pears and +some marmalade, a jug of water and a glass. Then he sat on a camp stool +and observed his guest. + +It was not until Chimp was well forward with the pears that his host +spoke again. 'I am sorry, Alexander Joseph Chemmle,' he said, 'to have +kept you waiting so long, for I take it that this is not your customary +appetite--that you were, in fact, unusually, if not painfully, hungry. +But I was so interested by the sight of a real boy that I could think of +nothing else. You see, I have never met with a boy before.' + +Chimp opened his eyes as wide almost as his mouth. 'But,' he began in +his astonishment, 'they are as common as dirt, boys are. There's heaps +of them--loads.' + +'True,' the other made answer, 'true. But when one abandons the world, +and, embracing the profession of the eremite, devotes one's life to +solitude and reflection, one is deprived of the pleasure of intercourse +with so attractive a personality as that of the average boy.' + +'Ye-es,' dubiously from Chimp. 'But,' he added, 'you were a boy yourself +once.' + +'No,' the Hermit made reply. 'Never.' + +'Never a boy!' Chimp exclaimed. 'Well, that beats everything.' + +'Never,' repeated the recluse. 'You see,' he remarked in explanation, 'I +was articled by my parents to a hermit at a very tender age--to the +learned man, in fact, who preceded me in the tenancy of this modest +cell. We plunged immediately into the fascinating study of metaphysics, +and the period of boyhood slipped by unnoticed.' + +Chimp whistled,--he had no words adequate to the occasion. + +'For many years,' the Hermit continued, 'I did not feel the loss of this +experience, being deeply engrossed in other subjects; but now, in the +fall of life, I find myself regretting it keenly. Much as I love my +studies, much as I am attached to the solitary life, I sometimes think +it a finer thing to have been a boy even than to have been a hermit.' + +Chimp thought it would be kind of him to say something cheery, yet could +hit upon nothing but, 'Oh no, not at all,' just as if the Hermit had +apologised for treading on his toe; yet it seemed to please the old man. + +'However,' he broke off, 'this is by the way. Come, Alexander Joseph +Chemmle, tell me about your adventures; how did you find your way to +this island? How is it you are alone? Tell me everything.' + +Chimp, wincing a little at the appalling formality of the Hermit's mode +of address, began. By the time his story was finished it was evening, +for the Hermit asked numberless questions which sent Chimp off on +numberless side tracks of narrative. At the end of the recital the +bloater paste was produced again, and Chimp again ate heartily. + +'Now,' said the Hermit, 'I will show you something of the island.' + +So saying, he took his staff and they set forth. First they visited the +spring whence the Hermit brought water, and then climbing to a peak of +rock, the Hermit described the island as it lay beneath them. + +'There,' said he finally, indicating the little creek to which the +footpath led, 'that is where the boat lands that once a year brings me +my provisions. It puts off from my Aunt Amelia's yacht--_The Tattooed +Quaker_. My Aunt Amelia is the only relative that remains to me. It is +she who supplies the tinned meats and the pears. She really has +admirable taste, although her choice in names may be a little fantastic. +In addition to the provisions, it is my aunt's custom to send a letter +beseeching me to return in the yacht to England, and declaring that if I +do not, that particular supply of food will be the last. For forty years +she has done this. She is a noble woman, my Aunt Amelia.' + +'When is the boat due?' Chimp asked, thinking more of its possible +effect upon himself than upon the Hermit. + +'Soon, soon,' the old man replied, with something very like a sigh. 'In +a fortnight's time, in fact.' + +'What a pity!' said Chimp. 'And I say, sir,' he added, 'how decent to be +you. Only there ought to be some niggers.' + +The Hermit sighed. They walked back without speaking, and not ten +minutes had passed before Chimp was sound asleep in a corner of the +cave, while the Hermit lay gazing at the stars. + +On awaking, Chimp found that the cave was empty. For a moment he thought +himself still dreaming, but the table laid for breakfast recalled him to +facts, and he fell to thinking of the Hermit. 'Rum old beggar!' he +mused. 'A screw loose somewhere, I guess.' When the Hermit returned, it +was plain that the old man had something on his mind, as the saying is. +He spoke not at all at breakfast, except, when laying the table, to +remark that potted ham and chicken make a pleasing variety upon bloater +paste. But after breakfast, placing one seat in the shade for Chimp and +one for himself, he talked. + +'I have been thinking deeply, Alexander Joseph Chemmle,' he began. +'During the night I have reviewed my life, and now more than ever I am +conscious of the limiting influence exerted upon a philosopher by the +loss of boyhood. The suspicion has been with me for years: it is now a +certainty. You are not likely, my young friend, to be with me long, for +_The Tattooed Quaker_ will, of course, carry you back to England next +week. But in the intervening time I want you, so far as is within your +power, to make a boy of me. I put myself unreservedly in your hands. +Consider me your apprentice. Will you do this?' The Hermit watched +Chimp's face anxiously. + +Chimp was staggered completely. A screw loose, he had thought; but +surely it was the height of madness for a man to wish to be a boy again. +Chimp and his companions spent a large part of their time in wishing to +be men: the other side was not to be believed. But he pulled himself +together with the thought that to humour this old lunatic might be +funny, and would last only a week. After all, to find a cracked man on +the island was better than to find no man at all, now that Ballantyne +had been proved to be so wrong. And just then the boy caught a glimpse +of the Hermit's anxious eager eyes. 'All right,' he said quickly, 'I'm +game. But it'll be rather difficult, you know.' + +'Difficult!' exclaimed the Hermit, with an expression of mingled pain +and alarm. 'How? Not seriously, I trust?' + +'Oh no!' said Chimp; 'but you're rather old, you see, and boys are not +in the habit of wearing beards three feet long; although,' he added +encouragingly, noting the look of disappointment on the Hermit's face, +'I don't see why they shouldn't. Why, there was a fellow at our school +who had whiskers before he was fourteen, and we shaved them too. Tied +him down and cut off one side one day and the other the next. After that +he bought a razor.' + +'Is--is that action typical of the boy?' the Hermit asked. + +'Well, they get up to larks now and then,' Chimp admitted. + +'As time is short,' said the Hermit, 'I am disposed to begin this +morning--at once. That is not too soon for you, I hope, Alexander Joseph +Ch----?' + +'Oh, please don't,' Chimp interrupted. 'You know, boys don't call each +other by all their names like that; they either stick to the last one or +invent a nickname.' + +'I am sorry to have hurt your feelings,' said the Hermit. 'If you will +tell me your nickname I will call you by it.' + +'I think,' replied Chimp, unwilling to explain his own, 'that perhaps +we'd better begin now and give each other fresh ones.' + +'Very well,' said the Hermit, after a minute's thought, 'I shall call +you Simian, or, for the sake of brevity, Sim.' + +'Simeon?' cried Chimp. 'Oh, that's not the thing at all! A nickname +should describe a fellow, you know--it shouldn't be just another +ordinary name.' + +'Yes,' replied his apprentice, 'and I mean to call you Sim, an +abbreviation of Simian. And what will you call me?' + +Chimp pondered awhile. 'I shall call you,' he said at length, +'Billykins, because of your long goat's beard.' + +And thus began the Hermit's apprenticeship. + +'It is too hot for footer,' said Chimp, after he had collected his +thoughts, 'so we will make a start with a little cricket practice. +Cricket,' he explained, 'is a game--the best game in the world. You +ought to see W. G. and Ranji. But of course you don't know who they are. +Oh dear, oh dear, what you are missing out here! W. G., that's W. G. +Grace, the champion of the world. Your beard, Billykins, must have been +rather like his a few years ago. And Ranji, that's Ranjitsinhji.' + +'Yes, yes,' the Hermit remarked feebly, depressed by the weight of his +stupendous ignorance. + +Chimp went on with fine authority. 'Now, while I am cramming this sock +with stuff to make a ball, you be sharpening these sticks for wickets. +You've got a knife, I suppose?' + +The Hermit admitted that he had not. + +'What!' cried Chimp; 'no knife? Why, you'll never be a boy without a +knife. Let me look at your pockets?' + +The Hermit had but one pocket, and a handkerchief was all it held. + +'Awfully clean,' was Chimp's contemptuous comment. 'And nothing else? +Oh, this will never do! Look at mine now,' and turning out his pockets, +he displayed a double-bladed knife containing several implements, +including a corkscrew and an attachment for extracting stones from +horses' feet, a piece of string, a watch spring, twenty or thirty shot, +a button, a magnet, a cog-wheel, a pencil, a match-box, a case of +foreign stamps all stuck together with salt water, a whistle, a +halfpenny with a hole in it, and a soaked and swollen cigar which the +Captain had given him. + +'Are all these things quite necessary?' the Hermit asked humbly. + +'No,' said Chimp, 'not quite all. The knife is, and the string is, and a +fellow likes his smoke, you know. Collecting stamps is rather decent, +but you needn't unless you want to. There's butterflies and birds' eggs, +if you like. The other things are useful: the more you have the better +for you.' + +'String,' said the Hermit, 'I possess--but no pocket-knife. But if you +permit it, I will carry my table-knife in future. 'Tis a simple weapon, +I know: but on the other hand you see that on this island the +opportunities of extracting stones from horses' hoofs are rare.' + +'I suppose it must do,' said Chimp doubtfully. 'But you must add a few +other things, or we shan't have anything to swap. Boys are great at +swapping, you know.' + +'Swapping?' the Hermit asked. + +'Yes: when you want one thing, giving another for it. For instance, if +you had a white rat' (the Hermit shuddered) 'and I gave you a brass +cannon for it, that would be a swap.' + +'Very well,' the Hermit replied seriously, 'I will add a few things; +but, if you don't mind, not rats of any colour, nor in fact any live +stock.' + +'Just as you like,' said the magnanimous Chimp. 'You wouldn't do for +Billy Lincolne though: he usually carries half a dozen frogs in his +trousers' pockets.' + +When the cricket gear was complete, Chimp stepped out twenty-two yards +and pitched the stumps. 'You go in first,' he said. + +The Hermit seized the bat. + +'Now all you have to do at first,' Chimp continued, 'is to keep the ball +out of the wicket. Hit it any way you like, and hold your bat straight.' + +The Hermit obeyed to the letter. To Chimp's intense astonishment he +punished the bowling all round, pulling off balls to square leg in a +shameless fashion. + +Chimp was kept busy, and at last he grew almost vexed. 'Well, you mayn't +have much science,' he cried, as, nearly out of breath, he flung himself +down after some miles of running, 'but you've got a gorgeous eye. Why, +you hit everything. You've played before, haven't you?' he added +suspiciously. + +The Hermit smiled again. 'A little,' he admitted. 'Yes, my late +instructor, the sage to whom I was confided by my parents many, many +years ago, he and I occasionally had a game together. It was our only +recreation. I thought it hardly worth while to mention it, expecting +that all skill had left me.' + +'By jingo! though, it hasn't,' Chimp exclaimed. 'You're a regular W. G. +in your way. But, I say, another time you know how to do a thing you +might let a fellow know first.' + +'This is too silly,' was Chimp's persistent thought during the next few +days, but he kept up the game of make-believe like a hero. As a matter +of fact, it was sound amusement to explore the island and plunge on +sudden impulses into a score of high-spirited enterprises, although the +presence of the old man panting at his side touched him rather sadly now +and then. The Hermit, however, endured stolidly and pluckily, and +neither of them ever let the time appear to drag. + +Chimp and his apprentice bathed together, and hunted for anemones among +the rocks; they gave chase to butterflies and lizards; they told +stories; they even pretended to be Robinson Crusoe and Friday, the part +of Friday falling to the Hermit. + +'You see, Billykins,' Chimp said, 'you are better suited to the part: +you can make such a whacking footprint.' + +'I think I am progressing well, Simian,' remarked Chimp's apprentice at +breakfast one morning, 'although I must admit that many impulses and +movements that come naturally to you are acquired by me with difficulty. +Last evening's attempt at leap-frog, for example, has left me so stiff +that I can hardly move, and I assure you that it has never before +occurred to me to climb that tree all the years I have known it. Perhaps +in a week or so, when my hands are healed, I may try again. But I can +see, Sim, that it must be very good to be a boy--very, very good.' + +'Why yes, Billykins,' Chimp broke in, 'but you don't know really +anything about it yet. And I'm afraid you can't know on this island. +There isn't the company and there isn't the means. I can't even make you +an apple-pie bed, when you sleep in a single blanket; and a booby-trap +needs a door. And when there are only two people, and no one else to +laugh, it's no fun to stick a cactus in a fellow's chair. Tuck, too! +What do you know about tuck? What can you know about tuck when there's +no shop for chocolate and Turkish Delight and things like that? Tinned +stuff is all very well, but it gets jolly tedious. And birds'-nesting, +and ratting, and setting night lines, and dodging game-keepers, and +breaking into orchards! You haven't even elastic to make a catty with, +or so simple a contrivance as a fish-hook. Still we might rig up a bow +and arrow.' + +'But,' the Hermit objected, 'there is nothing to shoot.' + +'Oh yes!' said Chimp, 'sea-gulls.' + +'We can't eat sea-gulls,' his apprentice replied. Then anxiously, 'Boys +don't eat sea-gulls, do they?' + +'Why, no, Billykins; but that isn't the thing. Bringing them down is the +thing. It's sport.' + +That evening after tea, Chimp approached his apprentice with a troubled +expression. + +'I think I ought to tell you, Billykins,' he goaded himself to say, +'that some boys fall in love. Not all, mind. I never did it myself--I +think it's footle--but lots and lots do. I suppose you'd like to try it, +you're so thorough; though I don't see how you're going to manage +exactly.' + +'You mean,' said the Hermit, 'on an island so poor in opportunities? +Yes, it would be difficult. Still, give me the outline.' + +'Well, Billykins, it isn't very clear,' said Chimp. 'I believe though, +that the fellow feels sort of jolly inside while it's going on. But it +never lasts long.' + +'And it's not compulsory?' the Hermit asked in some trepidation. + +'Oh no, Billy, not at all.' + +'Then we will dismiss love along with sport,' was the Hermit's decision. + +Thus, in games and rambles and conversation, the time passed by, until +it was the evening before the day that would bring _The Tattooed +Quaker_, and Chimp and his apprentice were sitting before the cave, +watching the sinking sun. + +'Well,' said the Hermit, 'only a few more hours, Sim, and you will be on +the way home again. Then I must to work once more. My great work on Man +and his place in Society, scientifically considered, awaits me. But I +shall miss you, Sim,' the old man added; 'you have been a very pleasant +chapter in my life. Don't forget me altogether, will you; and you'll pay +my Aunt Amelia a visit, won't you, and tell her about me?' + +Chimp had a little difficulty in replying. He felt girlish, that is to +say, gulpy and tearful. At last, 'Why don't you come back too?' he +asked. + +'I?' said the Hermit. 'Oh no, there is no place for Hermits in your +country.' + +'I don't know about that,' said Chimp, speaking more naturally again. +'You might make a lot of money showing yourself in caravans at fairs. +People would go miles to see a hermit. I paid a penny once to see a fat +woman, and there was no end of a squash in the tent. You must come. I'll +take you to my uncle's, where I live in the vacs. and Jim--that's my +cousin--Jim and me'll give you a ripping time.' + +The Hermit smiled sadly. 'No, no,' he said. After a short silence he +spoke again. 'Tell me, Sim--I ask merely out of curiosity--are boys +always contented with their surroundings?' + +'Not by a long chalk,' Chimp answered. 'They're always running away.' + +'Ah!' said the Hermit. 'How often have you run away?' + +'Well, not at all, so far,' said Chimp, 'although Goring minor and I did +get all ready to bunk once, only Mother Porker copped us on the landing. +But we meant it, I can tell you. We were going to walk to Portsmouth, +sleeping under hay ricks, and hide ourselves as stowaways on board a +man-of-war, and show up when we got to sea, and do something heroic to +please the Captain, and after that win loads of prize-money and come +back covered with glory. Boys often do that in books. But old Mother +Porker copped us on the landing.' + +'Bed-time,' said the Hermit. + +When they rose the next morning, there, in the offing, heading straight +for the island, was _The Tattooed Quaker_. They hurried to the peak, and +the Hermit waved his handkerchief. The signal was seen on deck, and an +answering flag scurried up to the mast-head. After breakfast Chimp and +his apprentice walked down to the creek to welcome the yacht's boat. + +The Captain looked at Chimp in amazement. 'What, Master Augustus!' he +said when he had shaken hands with the Hermit and delivered Aunt +Amelia's letter, 'what! have you got a pupil, then?' + +'No,' replied the Hermit, 'he's not my pupil, he's your passenger'; and +so saying, he introduced Chimp, and then stood aside to see what his +aunt had to say; while the crew waited for the Captain's orders to move +the stores from the boat to the cave. + +When the Hermit had finished reading, he returned the letter to its +envelope and slipped it into his pocket. + +'Well, Master Augustus, are you coming back with us?' said the Captain, +exactly as he had asked the question for the past forty years. + +The Hermit laughed in negative reply, exactly as he had laughed once a +year for the past forty years. + +'Now then, my men, be quick,' said the Captain. + +In the boat was a large hamper in which to convey the stores over the +rocks to the cave. Two of the sailors held it at each end, and the +Hermit accompanied them, while Chimp and the Captain strolled away +together. Three times the hamper was borne from the boat to the cell. +There then remained only a dozen or so of parcels, which the men might +easily carry in their hands. This time the Hermit did not accompany +them. + +When the last of the stores were safely within the cave the boatswain +blew his whistle as a signal that all was ready, and Chimp and the +Captain of _The Tattooed Quaker_ hurried back to the creek. + +'Where is Master Augustus?' the Captain inquired. 'The young gentleman +wants to say good-bye to him.' + +'He must be in the cave,' said Chimp. 'I'll run and see.' + +But the cave was empty. Chimp climbed the rock before the entrance and +called, 'Bi-i-illykins, Bi-i-illykins!' No answer. 'I must have missed +him on his way back to the creek,' he thought, and hurried to the shore +again. + +'Be quick!' cried the Captain. 'Time's up!' + +'But I can't find him,' Chimp called, floundering from boulder to +boulder. + +'Can't find him?' echoed the Captain. 'That's very rum. I suppose he +wants to avoid the pain of parting. Come along; we can't stay any longer +now.' + +So with a heavy heart Chimp took his place in the boat and watched how +with every stroke of the oars the distance widened between himself and +the island. + +'Weigh the anchor!' cried the Captain, the moment they were on board. + +_The Tattooed Quaker_ was a superb yacht, and in the ardour of +exploration Chimp forgot the Hermit and everything else. He examined the +cabin and the berths, he made friends with the steward, he descended +into the lazarette, where peering into the refrigerator, he found half a +game pie, and forthwith devoured it. He conversed learnedly with the +engineers about the size of the cylinders; he decided which hammock +would best minister to his own comfort; he overhauled the Captain's +stock of books, and by the time these duties were accomplished _The +Tattooed Quaker_ was well out to sea, and the island was only a thin +line on the horizon. And then a feeling of sadness for the loss of poor +old Billykins, left there all alone again, took hold of the boy, and he +retired dismally to his hammock to mope. + +After dinner, however, at which meal he revived marvellously, he was in +gay enough spirits to tell the story of the Hermit's apprenticeship. The +Captain was in ecstasies. 'What a yarn for the old lady!' he remarked +again and again. 'What a yarn!' + +Suddenly, as they sat in the darkling cabin, there appeared in the +doorway a figure which seemed in the gloom to resemble an elderly man +with a long grey beard. + +'Mercy! What's that?' the Captain shouted, leaping from his chair and +drawing back. 'Who are you? What do you want?' + +The figure took a step into the room. 'Simian,' it said, 'don't you +recognise me?' + +'Why, it's Billykins!' cried Chimp, running forward and seizing the +Hermit's hand. + +'Great Heavens! Master Augustus!' exclaimed the Captain. 'Where did you +spring from?' + +'From the hamper!' said the Hermit. + +Chimp and the Captain stared at each other for a moment, and +then--'What!' roared the Captain, 'a stowaway! Well, you're something +like an apprentice, you are!' And he smote the table till the ship +trembled, and laughed like the north wind. + +The Hermit waited patiently till the storm abated, while Chimp gazed at +him in wonderment and admiration. + +Then, in the lulls of the Captain's merriment, he explained. 'You see,' +he said, 'this boy has changed me considerably. I see things with new +eyes. And when I was standing there by the boat, the desire to run away +and be for ever quit of the island and solitude came strongly upon me.' + +'Oh, what a model apprentice!' the Captain exclaimed. + +'So,' continued the Hermit, a little abashed, 'well--so I crawled into +the hamper.' + +'Hooray!' cried Chimp; it's splendid. But aren't you hungry?' + +'Hungry?' said the Captain, 'I should think he is. Steward!' he called, +'bring some supper for Master Augustus.' + +The steward came running into the cabin and stood transfixed--all eyes. +His appearance set the Captain off again; 'Don't be scared,' he said; +'he's alive, right enough.' + +'I didn't see the gentleman come aboard,' the steward found words to +say. + +'No,' said the Captain, 'no more didn't I. No more didn't no one. Master +Augustus has his own way of coming aboard.' + +At this the Hermit laughed too, and the spell being broken, the steward +brought supper as to a man of flesh and blood. + +'So I'm a runaway, Sim,' the Hermit said cheerily when he had finished; +'and there was no Mother Porker to catch me on the landing.' + +'Catch you? No! You're A1 at it!' Chimp replied. + +'Yes,' resumed the Hermit, stretching his limbs, 'we're going to be +comrades again. But when we're in England, mind, no fairs, Sim, no +caravans.' + +Chimp laughed. + +'And we'll go and see Ranji,' said the Hermit. + +THE END + + + + +The Dumpy Books for Children. + +Selected by E. V. LUCAS. + +I. THE FLAMP, THE AMELIORATOR, AND THE SCHOOLBOY'S APPRENTICE, _by E. V. +LUCAS_ + +II. MRS. TURNER'S CAUTIONARY STORIES + +III. THE BAD FAMILY, _by Mrs. Fenwick_ + +IV. LITTLE BLACK SAMBO, _by Helen Bannerman_. With Pictures in colours +by the Author + +V. THE BOUNTIFUL LADY, _by Thomas Cobb_ + +VI. A CAT BOOK, Portraits _by H. Officer Smith_, Characteristics _by E. +V. LUCAS_ + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Flamp, The Ameliorator, and The +Schoolboy's Apprentice, by E. V. Lucas + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 30445 *** diff --git a/30445-h/30445-h.htm b/30445-h/30445-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..ac1df40 --- /dev/null +++ b/30445-h/30445-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,2342 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" + "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> + +<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"> + <head> + <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=UTF-8" /> + <title> + The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Flamp, The Ameliorator, And The Schoolboy's Apprentice, by E. V. 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V. LUCAS</h2> + + +<h4>LONDON: GRANT RICHARDS<br /> +1900</h4> + +<h4><i>First printed October</i> 1897<br /> +<i>Reprinted December</i> 1897<br /> +" <i>August</i> 1899<br /> +" <i>December</i> 1900</h4> + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + +<div class="figcenter"> +<img src="images/illus1.jpg" alt=""/> +</div> + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + + + +<h2><i>CONTENTS</i></h2> + +<!-- Autogenerated TOC. Modify or delete as required. --> +<p> +<a href="#The_Flamp">The Flamp</a><br /> +<a href="#I">I</a><br /> +<a href="#II">II</a><br /> +<a href="#III">III</a><br /> +<a href="#IV">IV</a><br /> +<a href="#V">V</a><br /> +<a href="#VI">VI</a><br /> +<a href="#VII">VII</a><br /> +<a href="#VIII">VIII</a><br /> +<a href="#IX">IX</a><br /> +<a href="#X">X</a><br /> +<a href="#XI">XI</a><br /><br /> +<a href="#The_Ameliorator">The Ameliorator</a><br /><br /> +<a href="#IA">I</a><br /> +<a href="#IIA">II</a><br /> +<a href="#IIIA">III</a><br /> +<a href="#IVA">IV</a><br /> +<a href="#VA">V</a><br /> +<a href="#VIA">VI</a><br /> +<a href="#VIIA">VII</a><br /> +<a href="#VIIIA">VIII</a><br /> +<a href="#IXA">IX</a><br /> +<a href="#XA">X</a><br /><br /> +<a href="#The_Schoolboys_Apprentice">The Schoolboy's Apprentice</a><br /><br /> +<a href="#The_Dumpy_Books_for_Children">The Dumpy Books for Children.</a><br /> +</p> +<!-- End Autogenerated TOC. --> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="The_Flamp" id="The_Flamp"></a>The Flamp</h2> + + +<h4><i>TO MOLLY AND HILDA</i>.</h4> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><i>That sunny afternoon in May,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>How stealthily we crept away,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>We three—(Good things are done in threes:</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>That is, good things in threes are done</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>When you make two and I make one.)—</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>To hatch our small conspiracies!</i><br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><i>Between the blossomy apple-trees</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>(You recollect?) we sped, and then</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>Safe in the green heart of the wood</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>We breathed again.</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>The purple flood the bluebells made</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>Washed round about us where we stood,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>While voices, where the others played,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>Assured us we were not pursued.</i><br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><i>A fence to climb or wriggle through,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>A strip of meadow wet with dew</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>To cross, and lo! before us flared</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>The clump of yellow gorse we shared</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>With five young blackbirds and their mother.</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>There, close beside our partners' nest,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>And free from Mr. C. (that pest!),</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>And careless of the wind and damp,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>We framed the story of</i> The Flamp.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><i>And O! Collaborators kind,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>The wish is often in my mind,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>That we, in just such happy plight,—</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>With Chanctonbury Ring in sight,—</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>Some day may frame another.</i><br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">E. V. L.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">1896.<br /></span> +</div></div> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="I" id="I"></a>I</h2> + + +<p>Once upon a time there dwelt in a far country two children, a sister and +a brother, named Tilsa and Tobene. Tilsa was twelve and Tobene was ten, +and they had grown up, as it were, hand in hand. Their father died when +Tobene was only a little piece of pink dimpled dough, and when their +mother died too, a few years after, old Alison was told to pack up the +things and journey with Tilsa and Tobene to the children's grandfather, +the Liglid (or Lord Mayor) of Ule, whom they had never yet seen.</p> + +<p>Old Alison was their nurse, and she had been their father's nurse before +them. Nothing worth knowing was unknown to old Alison: she could tell +them where the fairies danced by night, and the names and habits of the +different people who live in the stars, and the reason why thrushes' +eggs have black spots and hedge sparrows' none, and how to make Toffee +of Paradise, and a thousand useful and wonderful things beside.</p> + +<p>Alison was old and wrinkled and bent, but there was not a warmer heart +in all the world, and no tongue could say kinder words than hers, and no +hands minister so lovingly to those who needed help. It was said that +Alison had only to look at a sore place and it was healed again. If any +one loved her more than Tilsa it was Tobene; and if any one loved her +more than Tobene it was Tilsa; and old Alison's love for them was as +strong.</p> + +<p>On the day appointed, the three travellers set forth in a chariot driven +by postilions, and in the course of a week's journeying through strange +countries came at last to Ule.</p> + +<p>At the southern gate they were met by the Liglid. They discovered him to +be more than a mere person—a Personage!—with white hair, and little +beady eyes, and a red nose, and a gold-laced hat.</p> + +<p>'Welcome,' said he, 'welcome, Tilsa and Tobene, to the city or Ule.' And +then he kissed the air an inch or two from the cheek of his +grandchildren and led the way to his house.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="II" id="II"></a>II</h2> + + +<p>Ule was a little city in the midst of a wide plain, and round about it +was a stout wall. One straight, white road crossed the plain from end to +end, entering the city at the northern gate and leaving it by the +southern gate. The borders of the plain were blue mountains whose peaks +reached the sky, and among these peaks the sun made his bed. At least, +so said the good people of Ule.</p> + +<p>Nothing could shake their faith, for did they not every morning see him +rise from the eastern peaks, fresh and ready for the day's work of +warming the air of Ule, and encouraging the trees of Ule to bear fruit +and the buds of Ule to spread into flowers? And every evening did they +not see him, tired and faint, sink to rest amid the western peaks? The +rare strangers who came now and then to the city and heard this story, +were apt to smile unbelievingly and ask laughingly how, after laying his +head among the pillows on the western side of the plain, the sun was +able to wake up on the opposite side, many miles distant?</p> + +<p>But this question presented no difficulty to the good people of Ule. +'Why,' they would reply a little irritably, for they liked to think that +the sun was theirs and theirs only, 'surely the sun can walk in his +sleep as well—nay, better—than ordinary folk? A baby could see that!' +they would add with a laugh.</p> + +<p>So it was settled that the sun spent all his time in the neighbourhood +of Ule. If the citizens had ever travelled away from their native part, +perhaps they would have thought otherwise; but they rarely, or never, +did.</p> + +<p>'What!' they would say, in pained astonishment, 'leave Ule! Why?'</p> + +<p>'To see the world,' the rash stranger who had made the suggestion might +reply.</p> + +<p>'The world? This is the world,' would be the answer.</p> + +<p>And they really believed that it was. The knowledge that thousands of +other places, no whit less happy than themselves, or even more happy, +were in existence would have made the Ulians quite bad-tempered. And +beyond doubt they were in need of no other cause to excite their anger, +for had they not the Flamp?</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="III" id="III"></a>III</h2> + + +<p>The Flamp was a monster who dwelt in a cave somewhere in the mountains +that surrounded the plain. Once every year, on Christmas night, the +Flamp came into the city and threw the population into a frenzy of +terror. That on this night of the year, a night set apart for joyfulness +and festivity, the Loathly Beast (for so he was called by orators in the +City Council when they had used the word Flamp often enough) should +invade their city, seeking his prey, seemed to the Ulians an act of the +grossest cruelty and injustice. Almost as soon as darkness had fallen on +Christmas Day, the noises in the city would cease, and the house-holders +and their families would sit within barred doors, with uplifted fingers, +holding their breath, and listening, listening. Then in the far distance +<i>flob! flob!</i> faint, <i>FLOB!! FLOB!!</i> less faint, <i>FLOB!!! FLOB!!!</i> +less faint, every moment louder, coming nearer and nearer, until the +earth shook, and the Flamp's flobbing, flamping feet filled the air with +deafening thuds.</p> + +<p>All keys were turned, all bolts were drawn, all blinds were down, by the +time he entered the city. Not a light was visible. The Flamp was heard +sniffing at this door, fumbling at the handle of that, knocking at +another, while the <i>shuff! shuff!</i> of his sides against the walls was +quite audible. Now and then he would sit down in the road and sigh +deeply, and the trembling listeners near by could hear the splashing of +his tears on the stones.</p> + +<p>After passing through every street, the Flamp would turn out of the gate +once more, and swing off across the plain to his cave in the mountains, +the earth would cease to tremble, and fainter and fainter would sound +his footfalls: <i>FLOB!!! FLOB!!! FLOB!! FLOB!! flob!</i> flob! until +at last all was still again. Then with white faces and shaking limbs the +citizens would crawl to bed, bemoaning their lot.</p> + +<p>The next day the streets were examined to see if any damage had been +done, but nothing was ever found except pools of water where the Flamp +had sat down to sigh and weep. One strange thing was observed after +every visit of the Flamp: these pools were always opposite houses where +there were children.</p> + +<p>'He comes for the children,' was the natural conclusion of the people. +'See how the Monster cries with rage and disappointment when he finds +all doors barred to him.'</p> + +<p>Measures had of course been taken to keep the Flamp out of Ule. The +gates were barricaded: he broke them down as easily as you break new +toys; spring guns were placed in the roads: they went off, the bullets +struck his hide, and, rebounding, smashed several windows, while one +even ricochetted against the statue of the Liglid in the market-place +and chipped off a piece of his Excellency's nose; poisoned meat was +spread about temptingly: in the morning it was found all gathered +together on the doorstep of the Sanitary Inspector. Thus in time it +became clear that the Flamp was not to be checked, and for many years +before the time of our story no other attempts had been made.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IV" id="IV"></a>IV</h2> + + +<p>The first knowledge of the Flamp which came to Tilsa and Tobene was +gained at breakfast on Christmas morning, when the Liglid warned them of +the precautions necessary in the city at night, and besought them to +make no noise lest the attention of the Loathly Beast should be drawn to +their house.</p> + +<p>'But what is the Flamp?' asked Tilsa.</p> + +<p>'What!' said the Liglid. 'A monster, a dreadful monster!'</p> + +<p>'What is it like?' Tobene asked.</p> + +<p>'Like?' said the Liglid, 'like? Why, no one knows. No one has seen it. +But we can hear it—oh, horrible, horrible!' and the little man covered +his eyes and shuddered.</p> + +<p>'Why does it come?' Tilsa went on.</p> + +<p>'To eat us,' said the Liglid.</p> + +<p>'How many people has it eaten?' said Tobene.</p> + +<p>'Eh!' the Liglid replied. 'Well, I don't—well, I can't exactly—well, I +don't think it has ever eaten any one yet. But it wants to and means +to.'</p> + +<p>'Then how do you know it wants to eat you?' Tilsa persisted.</p> + +<p>'Because,' said the Liglid, 'because it sounds like it.'</p> + +<p>At night the Flamp came, and the city trembled and the earth shook. +Before the Liglid's house it sat down and wept and sighed for fully five +minutes, while within doors the Liglid turned all the colours of the +rainbow with fright. 'His face was fine,' said Tobene afterwards: 'just +like those whirligig things at the end of magic-lantern shows.' From +which remark you may judge that Tobene did not share his grandfather's +alarm, nor did Tilsa, nor old Alison.</p> + +<p>The next morning there was a pool outside the Liglid's house large +enough to sail a boat on.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="V" id="V"></a>V</h2> + + +<p>One day not long after the Flamp's visit, Tilsa ran into old Alison's +room to ask something, and was surprised and grieved to find her nurse +rocking to and fro in her chair, with her face covered. Now and then +between her fingers trickled the tears, and Alison sighed deeply.</p> + +<p>'What is it?' Tilsa asked, kneeling beside her. 'Can I do anything, dear +Alison?'</p> + +<p>'Only stay here, dearie,' sobbed the old woman. 'I was remembering +happier days. Stay here, Tilsa dear. All I want is sympathy.'</p> + +<p>So Tilsa stayed, and Alison soon was herself again. 'Thank you, dearie,' +she said as she wiped her eyes and jumped up ready to set to work again; +'you have done me a world of good. Always be sympathetic if you can. No +one knows how grateful it is.'</p> + +<p>It was nearly bed-time, and Tilsa went downstairs to say good-night to +the Liglid. On the way her little white forehead was puckered into lines +like a railway map.</p> + +<p>She entered her grandfather's room softly. The old man was seated on one +side of his desk; on the other was the Town Clerk of Ule. Between them +was a large sheet of paper with these words at the top:</p> + + +<h3>'A BILL FOR THE CIRCUMVENTION<br /> +OF THE FLAMP.'</h3> + + +<p>They were too busy to notice Tilsa's entrance.</p> + +<p>'We must hurry it through the House,' the Liglid was saying, 'or there +won't be time. Rigmarola is a long way off.'</p> + +<p>'How long will it take to march the troops here?' the Town Clerk asked.</p> + +<p>'Fully six months,' said the Liglid, 'and then they must be drilled. +They don't fight Flamps every day, and they may find it difficult to fix +upon a mode of attack. What a pity it is,' he added, 'that Ule has no +army.'</p> + +<p>'It will be expensive,' said the Town Clerk.</p> + +<p>'Money,' the Liglid remarked, 'is no object where the circumvention of +the Flamp is concerned. The city has suffered long enough.'</p> + +<p>'True,' said the Town Clerk.</p> + +<p>Tilsa now ventured to interrupt. 'Grandpapa,' she said, 'I've come to +say good-night.'</p> + +<p>'Eh!' said the old man, now seeing her for the first time. 'Good-night? +Oh yes! good-night, my dear'; and after his wont he kissed the air an +inch from her cheek.</p> + +<p>Tilsa did not at once run out of the room as she generally did, rather +glad to have done with the ceremony; instead, she spoke again. +'Grandpapa, I think I know what the Flamp wants when he comes to the +town.'</p> + +<p>'Eh!' cried the Liglid, who was intent on his Bill again. 'Eh! I thought +you'd gone to bed. You know what the Flamp comes for?' he continued.</p> + +<p>'Yes,' said Tilsa, 'it's not to eat people at all, or to do any harm; +it's for sympathy.'</p> + +<p>'Rubbish!' said the Liglid. 'Nonsense—don't meddle with things you +don't understand. Run off to bed at once.'</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VI" id="VI"></a>VI</h2> + + +<p>For a long time Tilsa lay awake, putting two and two together and making +four every time. Then she jumped out of bed and pattered with her bare +feet into Tobene's room.</p> + +<p>'Toby,' she said, gently shaking him. 'Toby!'</p> + +<p>Tobene thrust out his arms and looked at her with eyes that saw nothing.</p> + +<p>'Toby,' Tilsa said again. 'It's me—Tilsa.'</p> + +<p>'Yes,' he said in the tone of one who is not much interested. 'What is +it?'</p> + +<p>'I've found out,' said Tilsa, 'what the Flamp comes for every year.'</p> + +<p>'What?' said Tobene.</p> + +<p>'Sympathy,' said Tilsa.</p> + +<p>'What's sympathy?' said Tobene.</p> + +<p>'Oh, it's putting your arms round people and being sorry for them.'</p> + +<p>'Pooh,' said Tobene, 'if that's sympathy, you must be wrong. He's too +big.'</p> + +<p>But Tilsa was not in the least discouraged.</p> + +<p>'No, Toby,' she said, 'I'm right. And, Toby, Toby, darling, I want to go +and find the Flamp and say I'm sorry for him, and I want you to come +with me.'</p> + +<p>'Me?' cried Tobene, now wide awake.</p> + +<p>'Of course,' said Tilsa. 'We've never done anything alone yet, and I +don't want to begin now.'</p> + +<p>'Well, I suppose it's all right,' Tobene faltered. 'But he's drefful +big, isn't he?'</p> + +<p>'I'm afraid he is rather large,' said Tilsa, as cheerfully as she could.</p> + +<p>'And isn't he mighty ferocious?'</p> + +<p>'Well,' said Tilsa, 'they say so, but nobody's sure. And you know, Toby +dear, what silly things the people here say about the sun shining +nowhere else but on the plain. We know better than that, don't we? Well, +very likely they're just as wrong about the Flamp. So you will go, Toby, +won't you?'</p> + +<p>'Yes, I'll go,' said Tobene. 'When shall we start?'</p> + +<p>'Now,' said Tilsa. 'I want you to dress directly without making any +noise. I'm going to write a little note to Alison,—she's too old to +come with us,—and then I'll be ready too.'</p> + +<p>Tilsa hurried back to her room, and wrote the following note to old +Alison:—</p> + +<div class="blockquot"><p><span class="smcap">My very dear Alison</span>—Toby and me are going to try and find the +Flamp and give him simpithy, which I am sure is what he wants, +because he cries and makes a noise just like you did to-day, only +louder, and that is what you said you wanted, dear Alison. Please +don't be frightened, because you said we ought always to give +simpithy when we can, however much it costs us. Please tell +grandpapa if the Flamp is what I think he is there won't be any +need to sircumvent him. With love and kisses, your loving <span class="smcap">Tilsa.</span></p></div> + +<p>Tilsa slipped the note under Alison's door and then fetched Tobene from +his room. They went first to the larder and packed a small basket with +food. Tobene's vote was for blancmange and jam tarts, but Tilsa said +that bread and biscuits were better.</p> + +<p>'How about salt?' Toby asked.</p> + +<p>'Salt?' said Tilsa, 'what for?'</p> + +<p>'To put on the Flamp's tail and catch him,' said Toby. 'Else how are you +going to hug him, Tilsa?'</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VII" id="VII"></a>VII</h2> + + +<p>The two little explorers squeezed through the bars of the northern gate +and for an hour or more hurried as fast as they could along the white +road. They had no plan. All that Tilsa knew was that the Flamp lived +somewhere in the mountains, but whether it was north or south, east or +west, she could not say.</p> + +<p>At the end of the second hour, Tilsa felt certain that it was time to +leave the road, because day was not far off and they were very weary.</p> + +<p>'Cheer up, Toby,' she said. 'We'll soon lie down and have some sleep. +I'm going to shut my eyes and I want you to turn me round three times, +and whichever way I walk then, that way we shall go.'</p> + +<p>This was done, and Tilsa struck off to the left of the road into the +plain. Then after walking for nearly an hour longer, they came to a +little dell with a pool at the bottom and bushes growing on its sides, +and here Tilsa stopped. The two children lay down together under a bush +and at once fell asleep.</p> + +<p>When Tilsa awoke, it was broad day. She roused Tobene, and they went to +the pool and splashed some water over their faces and hands, and then +Tilsa opened the basket. Breakfast consisted only of bread and butter +and biscuits, but as they were hungry it was better than a banquet. The +real business of the day was yet to begin, and Tilsa was wondering how +to set about learning the road, when both children were startled by a +wee voice.</p> + +<p>'I call that piggish,' it said. 'And inconsiderate too.'</p> + +<p>Not seeing any speaker, neither child replied but only stared at each +other in puzzlement.</p> + +<p>'Yes,' the tiny voice continued, 'people can be too tidy. Dropping +crumbs is a bad habit in the house, I know, but out of doors it becomes +a virtue. People who get up first thing in the morning to gorge +themselves with bread and biscuits in this greedy way, and then drop no +crumbs—well, piggish and inconsiderate is what I call them.'</p> + +<p>The accusation aroused Tilsa. 'We didn't gorge,' she said, 'whoever you +are, and we've slept here all night. But here are some crumbs for you, +anyway,' and so saying, she broke up a piece of bread and scattered it +on the ground.</p> + +<p>Immediately a little fiery-crested wren hopped down from a branch of the +bush and began to peck among the grass.</p> + +<p>'Thank you,' he said when he had finished; 'but if you had done it +without being asked it would have been better.'</p> + +<p>'We didn't see you,' said Tobene in excuse.</p> + +<p>'Doesn't matter,' the wren replied; 'birds is everywhere, and always +hungry. Wherever you drop crumbs you may be sure they'll be acceptable. +Remember that. Now, is there anything I can do for you?'</p> + +<p>'Well,' said Tilsa, 'we want to know the way to the Flamp.'</p> + +<p>'Before I tell you,' said the wren, 'you must inform me whether I am +speaking to a boy or a girl.'</p> + +<p>'I am a girl,' said Tilsa. 'Toby here is a boy.'</p> + +<p>'Very well,' the wren answered. 'Then I must talk to Toby. I make it a +rule never to join in friendly conversation with women. They wear my +feathers in their hats.'</p> + +<p>'But men shoot you,' Tobene interposed, angry that Tilsa should be +treated in this way.</p> + +<p>'True,' said the wren, 'true. But so long as there are men, birds must +expect to be shot. It's all in the day's work and must be endured. But +for one's body to go to the milliner's is intolerable. Intolerable.' The +little creature suddenly swallowed its rage, and continued more sweetly: +'Now, as to the Flamp. What you want, Toby, is a Flamp compass.'</p> + +<p>'What's that?' Tobene asked.</p> + +<p>'Why, an ordinary compass points to the north, doesn't it? Well, a Flamp +compass points to the Flamp,' said the wren. 'Then you can find the +way.'</p> + +<p>'But where are we to get one?' was Tobene's very natural question.</p> + +<p>'The hedgehog makes them,' said the wren. 'On the other side of this +dell you will see a line of bushes. The hedgehog lives under the +fourteenth. Knock on the ground three times and he'll come out. Now I +must be off. Good-morning.' And with these words the fiery-crested wren +flitted away.</p> + +<p>At the fourteenth bush the children knocked three times on the ground.</p> + +<p>'Well?' said a surly voice.</p> + +<p>'Please we want a Flamp compass,' said Tilsa.</p> + +<p>At once the hedgehog appeared. 'I beg your pardon,' he said in softer +tones, 'but I mistook you for the rates and taxes, or I shouldn't have +spoke so short. I wasn't expecting customers so early. A Flamp compass? +Why, I don't think I have one in stock. You see, since the Flamps died +off, the demand has been so small that very few are made. There's my +own, which has been in the family for years, but I shouldn't care to +part with that except at a high price.'</p> + +<p>'How much would you call a high price, sir?' Tilsa inquired a little +anxiously.</p> + +<p>'Well, I couldn't let it go for anything less than a Ribston pippin, or +its value,' said the hedgehog. 'But I'm open to offers,' he continued.</p> + +<p>'Toby,' said Tilsa, 'turn out your pockets.'</p> + +<p>Tobene did so, and Tilsa examined the produce with a doubtful face.</p> + +<p>'Please, sir,' she said, 'would you like for the Flamp compass, which +you say is an old one, a piece of string, two marbles, some +toffee—although I'm afraid it's rather mixed up with string—eight +nuts, a screw, a peg-top, and a knife?'</p> + +<p>'The knife will be useful,' said Toby, who was looking on a little +ruefully, but convinced that Tilsa, as usual, was doing the right thing +and therefore must be supported, 'in case any one tries to snub you.'</p> + +<p>'Ah, you needn't trouble about that,' said the hedgehog. 'It's a +difficult matter to snub me. You see,' he added, 'by the nature of his +construction a hedgehog is not easily sat upon. But to business. +Considering that the times are hard, I don't mind accepting your offer, +miss.'</p> + +<p>So saying, to Tilsa's immense delight, the hedgehog retired under the +bush again, and came out carrying the Flamp compass. 'Is there anything +else I can do for you?' he asked. 'Any periwinkle brooms or mallow +cheeses this morning? We have a nice stock of thistle-clocks just in.'</p> + +<p>'No, thank you,' Tilsa replied as they hurried off. 'Nothing more +to-day. Good-morning.'</p> + +<p>The compass was neatly contrived of the cup of an acorn, through the +bottom of which ran a hedgehog's prickle. Balanced on the point was the +needle, a spear of dried grass, and over all was a spider's web to serve +as glass.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VIII" id="VIII"></a>VIII</h2> + + +<p>No matter how the Flamp compass was twisted, the needle pointed steadily +to the mountains before them, and the children marched bravely forward. +They were hungry and tired, but Tilsa would as soon have thought of +asking Tobene to carry her as of turning back. As for Tobene, he put one +foot before the other as firmly as he was able, and tried to forget the +loss of his treasures.</p> + +<p>The worst part of the journey was clambering over the hot rocks when the +mountains were reached, and the travellers did at last lose their +resolute cheerfulness, and had just sat down in the shade to have a good +cry, when they suddenly heard the sound of singing. Not exactly singing; +rather a melancholy droning, or chanting, as of a dirge. Listening +intently, they could make out these words:</p> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><i>I'm not in the least in love with life;</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>I might be, p'raps, if I had a wife</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>To care for me in a wifely way,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>Or a neighbour or two to say good-day,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4"><i>Or a chum</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4"><i>To come</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>And give me the news in a friendly talk</i>,<br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>Or share a duet or a meal or a walk.</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>But all alone in the world am I,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4"><i>And I sit in a cave,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4"><i>And try to behave</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>As a good Flamp should, with philosophy.</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>I shan't last long, for the cave is damp,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>And nothing's so bad for a Flamp</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4"><i>As cramp....</i><br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p>'It's the Flamp!' said both children together, fearfully.</p> + +<p>The chanting began again, and Tilsa and Tobene jumped up and, following +the sound of the voice, came to a wide and heavily-trodden path between +two rocks. They plodded along it until, rounding a crag, they perceived +immediately before them a yawning cave. Although the singer was out of +sight, the noise made by him was now almost overwhelming and so dismal +that the children were on the point of joining in the lamentation +themselves.</p> + +<p>A few steps more brought them in sight of the melancholy songster. +Seated in a corner of the cave, with his massive head on his fore-paws, +the picture of dejection, was the most enormous creature they had ever +seen or dreamed about. He was rather like an elephant, but much more +immense and without a trunk: a huge, ungainly, slate-coloured animal.</p> + +<p>He did not hear them, but sat rocking to and fro in his corner, moaning +lugubriously.</p> + +<p>'Toby,' said Tilsa, who now was not in the least alarmed, 'can you +cough?'</p> + +<p>'I'll try,' said Toby, and he coughed.</p> + +<p>The Flamp took down one paw from its desert of face and peered out. Then +he sprang to his feet and rubbed his heavy, watery, blue eyes in blank +astonishment. Tilsa and Tobene did not move. They stood still, gazing +into the Flamp's great, mournful face, now wrinkled up with surprise and +excitement.</p> + +<p>Then the Flamp spoke—'What?' he said, 'kids? Real kids? Flesh-and-blood +kids? Human, rollicking, kind-hearted kids?'</p> + +<p>'We are real children,' Tilsa replied at length, 'if that is what you +mean, and, oh, we are so glad to have found you! The hedgehog's compass +told us to come this way, or we should never have reached you at all.'</p> + +<p>'Then you set out intending to find me?' said the Flamp. 'Well, that is +a good one. How is it you're not scared, like all the rest of them?'</p> + +<p>'I don't know,' said Tilsa. 'I can't think. But we weren't, were we, +Toby?'</p> + +<p>'No,' said Tobene.</p> + +<p>'And what made you come?' the Flamp asked.</p> + +<p>'We—we—' Tilsa faltered. 'Well, sir, we thought you wanted sympathy, +like Alison did. And so we came to—to try and give you some.'</p> + +<p>'And so I do,' the Flamp gasped out. 'And so I do,' and he lifted up his +right paw, and brushed it across his eyes. 'You see, it's precious +little of it I get. It's very hard, I can assure you, my dears, to be +the last of one's race. Why, the land was full of Flamps once, and a +fellow need never be in want of company, but now—now they're all dead, +all but me, and I'm not long for this life.' The Flamp sighed and +dropped a tear, which splashed heavily.</p> + +<p>Tilsa felt very sorry. 'Poor—' she began to say, but stopped abruptly. +She was intending to say 'Poor Flamp,' but that now seemed to her too +familiar; so she altered it to 'Poor gentleman!' although when the word +was out, it seemed equally unsuitable.</p> + +<p>Tobene said nothing aloud, but nudged Tilsa and whispered, 'Aren't you +going to try throwing your arms round him, Tilsa? It's time, isn't it?'</p> + +<p>'Hush!' said Tilsa severely.</p> + +<p>The Flamp went on: 'And I doubt if any one is keener on company than I +am. Over in the city yonder, you know, they have a season called +Christmas, when every one is supposed to be friends with every one else; +and I thought to myself, That's the time for me. I won't ask for much, I +thought, but if just one night in the year they'll look pleased to see +me, and say, 'How do?' why I'll be very grateful to them and a deal +happier during the months that follow. It wasn't much to ask, was it? +But I suppose I didn't go to work the right way, or perhaps I had two +legs too many. Anyway, they misunderstood me: thought I'd come to do +them harm or something, and tried shooting me and poisoning me and +barricading themselves in. Wouldn't even give me a moment's sight of a +kid's face. I didn't try any other night. It seemed to me that if at a +season of goodwill they would behave like that, my chances at an +ordinary time would be less than nothing. But men can't understand +animals. Children can, though they're apt to grow out of it. Thank +goodness, there's <i>some</i> children that stay childlike to the end, +however old they may be.' He brushed his paw across his eyes again.</p> + +<p>Soon he went on: 'So I've had to live alone, with no company but my own +voice. Maybe you heard me singing as you came. It wasn't much of a song, +I admit, for elegance of rhyme and metre don't seem to come easy, but a +song like that is more comfort than you'd believe.' He paused again.</p> + +<p>Then he turned radiantly to his visitors. 'And you've trudged all the +way from the city just to be kind to me, have you? Well, that is good of +you! Bless your hearts, no one knows how much a deed like that means. +Why, it's as good as smush even to know that any one is thinking of you +kindly, let alone doing things. I haven't felt so cheery and comfortable +for years. But you must be hungry. Now tell me what you would like to +eat and I'll try and get it for you, and afterwards you must tell me all +about yourselves.'</p> + +<p>Tilsa looked at Tobene, and Tobene at Tilsa.</p> + +<p>Then Tobene spoke to the Flamp for the first time. 'You said just now +that something was as good as smush. Please, what is smush? because if +it's something to eat, I should like that.'</p> + +<p>The Flamp laughed all over: 'Splendid,' he cried, 'splendid! Something +to eat? I should rather think it is. You couldn't have made a better +choice. You shall have smush. Sit down here while I get it ready.'</p> + +<p>Tilsa and Tobene sat down, and the Flamp retreated farther into the +cave. There was a noise of pots and pans.</p> + +<p>'Isn't he a whopper?' said Tobene.</p> + +<p>'Tremendous,' said Tilsa. 'And what a dear old thing!'</p> + +<p>'Yes,' Tobene continued, 'and what a set of donkeys those people at Ule +have been all these years. Why, he's as jolly as Alison, in a different +way. Do you think he'll give us a ride, Tilsa?'</p> + +<p>'Of course he will,' said a deep voice above them. 'But you must eat +some smush first,' and looking up, they saw the Flamp on his hind legs, +towering into the roof of the cave, and in his paws a large dish and +some plates and spoons. 'Now then,' he said, 'eat as much as you can.'</p> + +<p>(All that the historian can do towards a description of smush is to say +that its colour is pink, and its taste quite indescribable but blessed +in the highest degree. When asked about it afterwards, Tilsa and Tobene, +even to their old age, would become purple and inarticulate with +enthusiasm. Perhaps if each of you thinks of all the most delicious +things you have ever eaten, you will come a little nearer to an idea of +what smush is like.)</p> + +<p>After they had finished, Tilsa told the Flamp all about herself, and +Tobene, and old Alison, and her grandfather the Liglid of Ule.</p> + +<p>'I expect,' she said, 'they are looking for us now. And I think, sir, if +you don't mind, it would be better if you were to go back with us, and +then we could let everybody see how kind and gentle you are, and +grandpapa won't go on trying to circumvent you.'</p> + +<p>'Circumvent?' said the Flamp. 'What's that?'</p> + +<p>'I don't know what it means,' said Tilsa, 'except that it's something +horrid. And someone named Bill's going to do it.'</p> + +<p>'All right,' said the Flamp, 'we will go back together, and the sooner +the better, I think, or that dear old Alison of yours will be nervous. +Although I should like to keep you here, you know. But you'll promise to +come again, won't you, and stay a long time?'</p> + +<p>'O yes,' cried Tilsa and Tobene together, 'we should just think we +will!'</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IX" id="IX"></a>IX</h2> + + +<p>That night the two children slept soundly in a corner of the cave, while +the Flamp sat by and watched them. In the morning, after a breakfast of +smush, they climbed on the monster's back and started for the city at a +good swinging pace.</p> + +<p>'It was like riding on a cloud,' said Tobene afterwards: 'so high up.'</p> + +<p>They were well within sight of Ule when—'Look,' said Tobene suddenly, +pointing in the direction of a speck on the white road, 'what's that?'</p> + +<p>'It moves,' said Tilsa. 'It's a person.'</p> + +<p>'We'll soon see what it is,' the Flamp grunted, lengthening his stride. +The earth shook as his feet beat upon it.</p> + +<p>As they came nearer and nearer, the children saw that the object was a +woman. For a moment she stood upright, looking all ways at once as +though panic-stricken, and then she suddenly unfurled a green umbrella +and sank behind it.</p> + +<p>'Why, it's Alison,' cried Tobene. 'Hurrah!'</p> + +<p>'Stop, stop!' cried Tilsa to the Flamp. 'Please don't frighten dear old +Alison. Let us go down and run to her.'</p> + +<p>The Flamp at once stopped and lay on his side, and the children slipped +to the ground and scampered as fast as they could towards their nurse. +The umbrella did not move. As they drew close they heard the old lady's +voice in beseeching tones: 'Please, Mr. Flamp, they're the sweetest +children in the world, and if you've swallowed them, you mountaineous +wretch you, you may as well swallow me too, for all there's left for me +to live for! Besides, I'm their nurse, and I might be useful to them +down inside. Ooh! Ooh! Please, Mr. Flamp, they're the sweetest children +in the world, and if you've swallowed them, you mountaineous wretch you, +you——'</p> + +<p>'Alison, dear, it's all right,' Tilsa interrupted, skipping up and +pushing the umbrella aside. 'We're as safe and happy as ever we were.'</p> + +<p>Alison stared first at one and then at the other of her truant charges. +Then—'Well?' she almost screamed, 'is it really you, my dearies?'</p> + +<p>'Really!' exclaimed both children at once, and there was such hugging as +the plain of Ule had never before seen.</p> + +<p>Soon Alison furled her umbrella and pointed to the Flamp, who was +smiling and chuckling and soliloquising in the distance.</p> + +<p>('It's as good as smush to see this,' he was saying.)</p> + +<p>'Is that him?' Alison inquired.</p> + +<p>'Yes,' said Tilsa, 'and he's such a dear, you can't think.'</p> + +<p>'Yes, come along and be introduced,' said Tobene, and without a word +Alison went, being quite assured that if the creature had not harmed her +two pets it would not harm her.</p> + +<p>'Mr. Flamp,' said Tobene, 'I want to introduce you to this lady, our +nurse Alison. She's the best nurse in the world. You ought to get her to +tuck you up at night.'</p> + +<p>'Tuck <i>me</i> up?' cried the Flamp, and—'Tuck <i>that</i> up?' cried Alison, +both together, and they all laughed, and at once Alison was at home and +comfortable.</p> + +<p>They went forward to the city, chatting gaily, but when the wall was +reached, the gates were found to be barricaded. No sound of life was +audible, no moving thing to be seen.</p> + +<p>'As I expected,' said the Flamp sadly. 'They heard me coming, and as +usual have locked themselves in. What's to be done?'</p> + +<p>'The best course,' remarked old Alison, who was always a wonderful +manager, whether with the cold mutton or a child in a temper, 'the best +course is to wait. You lie down here, Mr. Flamp, and make as little +noise breathing as you can; and you, Tilsa, darling, take this pencil +and paper and write a note to your grandfather, to be slipped under the +gate. They'll venture out soon and find it.'</p> + +<p>The Flamp and Tilsa did as they were bid. This was Tilsa's note to the +Liglid:—</p> + +<div class="blockquot"><p>'<span class="smcap">My dear Grandpapa</span>—There is no need to be frightened. Alison and +Toby and me are just outside the gates all safe with the Flamp, who +is really and truly the sweetest creature you ever saw. He doesn't +want to hurt this city at all, he only wants simpithy like I said +he did. If you open the gate and tell the people this you can see +for yourself how kind and gentle he is, and that there isn't any +need of sircumventing him. So please open the gate quickly. Your +affectionate grandchild,</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">Tilsa.</span></p></div> + +<p>The paper was folded and addressed to 'His Excellency the Liglid of +Ule,' and Tobene slipped it under the gate. Then the little party sat +down to wait. Old Alison took out her knitting, and as she worked, told +the others of her adventures in search of them. 'I had to come alone,' +she said: 'every one else was frightened.'</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="X" id="X"></a>X</h2> + + +<p>One hour passed, two hours, three hours, and then a flag of truce +appeared above the ramparts.</p> + +<p>'Here, Mr. Flamp,' said Alison, 'get up and wave this in reply'; and she +gave her handkerchief to the Flamp.</p> + +<p>He mounted slowly on his hind feet, and, stepping to the wall, waved the +handkerchief over it. A few minutes went by, and then the Liglid's +scared face appeared at a loophole. Seeing Tilsa, Tobene, and Alison +sitting comfortably in the shade cast by the Flamp's huge body, he +seemed to be reassured.</p> + +<p>'Alison,' he called out, 'are those really the children?'</p> + +<p>'No doubt of it, sir,' said Alison.</p> + +<p>'Then wait a little longer,' said the Liglid as he vanished.</p> + +<p>He went at once to the Council Chamber and summoned a meeting of the +wise men of Ule. 'Apparently,' he said, 'we have misjudged this creature +for many years; but our duty now is simple: to draw up as quickly as may +be an address of welcome to our eccentric visitor.'</p> + +<p>An hour later, a procession of the men of eminence of the city, followed +by the inhabitants, marched along the streets to the northern gate. At +the Liglid's word of command, the barricades were removed and the gate +flung open.</p> + +<p>Tilsa and Tobene at once ran to their grandfather and kissed him, while +Alison dropped a curtsey. The Flamp stood up and bowed as gracefully as +he could, and the Liglid returned the salute, not without some shaking +in the knees.</p> + +<p>In faltering tones, which afterwards grew more steady, he begged of the +Flamp the 'honour of his attention for a few moments,' and forthwith +read the address of welcome. It was flowery and extravagant in style, +and contained not a few statements which sent a spasm across the Flamp's +wide expanse of face, such as might be caused by an attempt to suppress +laughter.</p> + +<p>At the end, the Flamp bowed again and laid a massive paw upon his heart. +Then he replied. He began by thanking the Liglid for his kind welcome, +continued with the expression of his determination to do in the future +all that he could for the good of the city, and ended with a eulogy of +Tilsa and Tobene.</p> + +<p>'They are, if I may use the word,' he said feelingly, 'kids which any +city should be proud of. And to be the grandfather of such bricks ought +to be as good as smush and a perpetual delight. And their nurse, ma'am +Alison here, is an old lady as is worthy of them.'</p> + +<p>The crowd cheered these remarks again and again, and Tilsa and Tobene, +who were not accustomed to such publicity, hardly knew where to look. As +for old Alison, she curtseyed and went on with her knitting. 'Children,' +she said to herself, 'that travel in search of Flamps wear out their +stockings. Flattery or no flattery, new stockings must be made.'</p> + +<p>Other speeches followed, for Ule was famous for its oratory, the best +being from a young statesman who made the admirable suggestion that in +commemoration of this auspicious day, a new order of merit should be +established, called the Order of the Friends of the Flamp, membership to +be conferred upon all persons conspicuous for spontaneous acts of +kindness. Further, he proposed that the first persons to add the letters +F.F., signifying Friend of the Flamp, to their names, should be Tilsa, +Tobene, and old Alison. The project was received with the wildest +enthusiasm, and the order was then and there founded. And to the end of +the history of Ule, no honour was esteemed more highly by the citizens +than the simple affix F.F.</p> + +<p>The formal part of the proceedings being finished, the Liglid proclaimed +the day a general holiday and in the name of the city invited the Flamp +to a grand banquet. Afterwards came sports of all kinds on the plain, in +which the Flamp took part, carrying enormous loads of children up and +down at a hand gallop, until the Commissioner of Works begged him to +move more slowly, owing to the danger caused to the public buildings of +Ule by the tremor of the earth. Never in the memory of the oldest +inhabitant had such a day of jollification and excitement been spent.</p> + +<p>Of course the Flamp was the chief attraction, but Tilsa and Tobene and +old Alison were very considerable lions too, and a hundred times they +told the story of their adventures. Presuming on his relationship to the +explorers, the Liglid, it must be confessed, endeavoured to take to +himself some credit for the proceedings, but it is doubtful if he was +believed.</p> + +<p>One worthy deed, however, he did perform: he publicly burned the Bill +for the Circumvention of the Flamp, amid deafening applause.</p> + +<p>At last, late in the evening, the Flamp said good-bye, promising to come +again soon, and swung off across the plain, the people waving farewell +to him from the city wall. And as he moved along, he chanted to himself +a new song, which, although not much better in rhyme and metre, was +vastly more cheerful than his old dirge. This was the first line of it:</p> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">'<i>O life, I think, is a jolly good thing.</i>'<br /></span> +</div></div> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="XI" id="XI"></a>XI</h2> + + +<p>There is no space to tell a thousandth part of the benefits conferred by +the Flamp upon the city which once had used him so ill. Suffice it to +say, that henceforward the Flamp became the guardian of Ule.</p> + +<p>A line of communication was set up between his cave and the city, and +when wanted he was signalled for; then at a rush he would cross the +plain, ready for any duty.</p> + +<p>He helped the people of Ule in countless ways, from overwhelming the +attacking force of the King of Unna, without the loss of a single man in +the defending army, to lying on the plain in the heat of summer and +casting a shadow in which picnic parties might have lunch.</p> + +<p>Sometimes the Flamp came when the signal had not been set in motion; and +then it was known that he was again in need of sympathy, and the +children of the city, headed by Tilsa and Tobene, would run out into the +plain to meet him and join in a game, or if it was at night, and he came +within the walls, the house-holders would join in the song of welcome +which the Poet Laureate of Ule had written for such occasions. And soon +the Flamp would return to the mountains happy again.</p> + +<p>The Christmas following the Understanding of the Flamp (as the +establishment of these new relations was called) was a time of good +fellowship, such as no Ulian had dreamed to be possible. Christmas at +last really was Christmas. The Flamp as of old came down at evening, but +this year no doors were barred, no blinds were drawn; instead he passed +from house to house throughout the city, looking in at the upper windows +and receiving a welcome at each, and sometimes a piece of plum-cake, +sometimes a packet of sweets, all of which passed down his huge red +throat. Is it necessary to say that his longest stay was at the nursery +window of the Liglid's house?</p> + +<p>In fact Tilsa and Tobene, as you may imagine, were always the Flamp's +favourites, and every summer it was they, and they alone, who were +honoured by an invitation to stay for a fortnight in the Blue Mountains, +where they had such a holiday as falls to the lot of few children.</p> + +<p>So did Ule, under the Flampian influence, become one of the happiest +spots in the world, and strangers poured into the city every day to +learn the secret of contentment.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="The_Ameliorator" id="The_Ameliorator"></a>The Ameliorator</h2> + +<h4><i>TO "EVERSLEY" AND ALL WITHIN IT</i></h4> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IA" id="IA"></a>I</h2> + +<h3>THE CITY OF BIRDS</h3> + + +<p>Once upon a time there was a city where the good people were under the +protection of singing-birds of all kinds: nightingales, thrushes, +blackbirds, robins, chaffinches, linnets. As you passed through the +streets the song of one at least of these little fellows was certain to +strike pleasantly on the ear; for they would perch on the window-sills, +or in the branches of the trees before the houses, and fling out their +glad notes.</p> + +<p>No money could buy the birds. It mattered not how rich a man was, if he +were not merry at heart no bird's voice could be his to gladden the +hours with song.</p> + +<p>Fugitives fleeing across the wide plain at night would, once within the +gates of the city, pause a moment with raised finger, listening +breathlessly. Then the still air would be filled with beautiful, +consoling music, and 'Hark,' they would say, 'the nightingale! A good +man lives close by. Let us knock and ask protection.' And travellers +hearing a blackbird whistling gaily before a hostelry would know that +within doors was brave cheer and jocund company.</p> + +<p>Most of the children in the city had each a bird friend, and it was a +sad day when the wings spread and the songster flew away, for that meant +that in the heart of the child all was not well. Always, however, when +the smiles came back, back came also the little feathered companion.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IIA" id="IIA"></a>II</h2> + +<h3>THE FOUR CHILDREN</h3> + + +<p>Now this story is about four children in the city who were friends of +the birds: Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline. They were for the most +part good children, but now and again they made up their little minds +that they knew better than anybody else what was the best thing for +them; and as it generally happened that their elders refused to take the +same view, there came occasionally into their lives intervals of +unhappiness when the whole world was most plainly doing its best to +spoil their fun and treat them altogether badly. At least so it seemed +in the eyes of Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline.</p> + +<p>And to those who had the care of Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline, it +was apparent one Monday evening that such an interval was about to +begin. Bertram's governess had the greatest difficulty in persuading +that all-knowing boy that lessons were in the least desirable; Beryl's +mother having refused to buy her a new doll, and thus bring her store of +dolls from fifteen to sixteen, could induce Beryl to fall in with no +plans whatever; and the barometers of Bobus and Aline were unmistakably +at 'Set Sulks,' because they too wanted something which was not good for +them. Thus, one Monday evening, was it with Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and +Aline.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IIIA" id="IIIA"></a>III</h2> + +<h3>THE NEW HOUSE</h3> + + +<p>On the Tuesday morning that followed, the inhabitants of the City of +Birds, when they came downstairs and began the business of the day, were +astonished to find a new shop in the Market Square; astonished, because +no one could remember either what the house was like before, or who had +then lived in it, or indeed that there had been a house there at +all—not even the house-agent, who felt more than a little annoyed in +consequence, deeming himself defrauded of his just fees.</p> + +<p>There, however, stood the house, leaving no room for doubt as to its +existence. There it stood, spick and span, with white window-curtains +tied up with red ribbons, and rows of flower-pots on the sills, and a +shining brass handle and knocker on the door, and a dark blind in the +shop window through which, howsoever noses might be flattened against +the glass, nothing could be seen. Hanging out over the pavement was a +quaint sign-board bearing the words</p> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">'THE AMELIORATOR.'<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p>And, to crown all, in the branches of the silver birch before the house +a thrush was singing, while the swallows were already busy under the +gable.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IVA" id="IVA"></a>IV</h2> + +<h3>THE BUSINESS CARD</h3> + + +<p>At seven o'clock on the same morning, Bertram awoke. Had any observers +been present they would have seen him turn over in bed, push his fists +into the air and fight the sunshine which was streaming through the +window, and then open his eyes and begin to remember where he was. Then +they might have seen him yawn to a greater extent than so small a boy +would seem to be capable of. It was when Bertram's waking operations had +reached this stage that he remembered what had happened last night: he +had been naughty and had gone to bed early in consequence. But he wasn't +in the least sorry for it, not he, and his governess was a beast. These +were his sentiments as he began to dress. 'I shan't wash this morning,' +he said to himself, 'just to spite them.'</p> + +<p>It was just as he was turning to leave the room that Bertram caught +sight of something white on the floor underneath the window. Picking it +up, he saw that it was a card—a business card—which certainly was not +there last night. 'It must have blown in,' he thought, and forthwith +began to read it. This is what he read:—</p> + + +<h4>THE AMELIORATOR</h4> + +<h4>begs to inform the Children of the City<br /> +of Birds that he has set up in Business<br /> +in their midst, and is ready (although not<br /> +eager) for their custom.</h4> + +<h4>SAD FACES BRIGHTENED WITH THE UTMOST DESPATCH.<br /> +TEARS DRIED. DISAPPOINTMENTS RELIEVED.<br /> +SORROWS TURNED TO PLEASURES.<br /> +BAD GOVERNESSES PUNISHED.<br /> +HARD LESSONS MADE EASY.<br /> +UNREASONABLE PARENTS BROUGHT TO THEIR SENSES.<br /> +TEMPER REPAIRING IN ALL ITS BRANCHES.</h4> + +<h4><i>Business Hours</i>—When you wish.</h4> + +<h4><span class="smcap">Terms Easy.</span></h4> + +<h4><span class="smcap">The Ameliorator,</span><br /> +Market Square,<br /> +City of Birds.</h4> + + +<p>The words seemed to Bertram too good to be true, and he read them again +slowly. '"Sad faces brightened with the utmost despatch." "Tears dried." +That's for girls of course,' he remarked (but why he was so emphatic it +is difficult to say, since it was only last night that——but that's of +no importance). '"Bad governesses punished." Hooroo! "Hard lessons made +easy." Now this,' said Bertram, 'is the right kind of fellow, this +A-M-E-L-I-O-R-A-T-O-R, this Ameliorator!' and so saying, he pushed the +card into his pocket and looked out of the window to whistle +good-morning to his robin. But the bird was not there. His face fell +again. 'Pooh,' he said, 'they're all against me now, but I don't care,' +and as he walked downstairs to breakfast, he made up his mind to be +thoroughly fractious.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VA" id="VA"></a>V</h2> + +<h3>THE CROSS-GRAINED MORNING</h3> + + +<p>In the City of Birds there were several large green gardens set aside +for children. These gardens were the finest places in the world in which +to play hide-and-seek, because of the summer-houses and grottoes and +winding paths; also there were ponds to sail boats on, and trees to +climb, and caves for robbers, and a little circle of wet grass in the +midst of rhododendron bushes for fairies to plot and plan in; and for +very hot afternoons a soft bank where you could lie in the shade of a +cedar which seemed to bless the earth with its broad hands.</p> + +<p>Every morning after lessons the four children used to meet in one of +these gardens and play till dinner-time. Sometimes they would play +cricket until they were too tired to run another yard, and then lean +over the rim of the fountain and watch the goldfish gliding silently +through the water, or they would sail their boats on the pond, or join +in the marriage ceremonies of two of the blue ants that lived in the +bark of the cedar. There was always plenty of excitement at a blue ant's +wedding, on account of the bad behaviour of the company. The bridegroom +had a way of ignoring the solemnity of the occasion and trying to walk +to church with one of the bridesmaids, or even the bride's mother, while +sometimes the bride would forget all about her duties, and leave the +procession in order to pick up and stagger away with a ridiculous piece +of wood which she could not possibly really need. Very often the bride +had to be changed as often as six times before the church was reached, +where Bertram, who always insisted on being the clergy-man, was waiting +to perform the service. Ants, it must be confessed, are not good at +games: they are too busy, or, as Bertram put it, too selfish. Neither +are wood-lice. Just at important moments wood-lice turn sulky and roll +themselves into little balls. Worms are most trust-worthy, although +never eager for sensible play; but worms are slimy, and Beryl always +refused to touch them. Spiders, too, have a way of getting down one's +neck. Perhaps frogs are best of all. Frogs are quite satisfactory; they +always jump when you touch them up. Toads, on the other hand, are sulky; +but their eyes are good to look into.</p> + +<p>On this particular morning, Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline met as +usual, but for some reason or other they found it impossible to have a +really good game; whatever they tried appeared flat and tiresome. They +began with cricket and were fairly successful until Bobus hit the ball +into the pond, where it immediately sank. Hitherto it always had +floated. Cricket, therefore, was over. Hide-and-seek took its place and +was going pretty well until Aline fell and hurt her knee. So no more +hide-and-seek. They tried the blue ants, and then the lizards that lived +under the leaves in the violet bed; but met with nothing but +unsociableness. The ants were quite nasty at being interfered with, and +one of them crawled up Beryl's arm.</p> + +<p>At last the children made up their minds to try no longer, and instead +they lay on their backs on the grass and grumbled. It was clear that the +world was against them, and what is the good of fighting in the face of +such opposition? Bertram began the grumbling. 'Old Tabby,' he +said,—that being the way in which he spoke of Miss Tabitha, his +governess,—'is a beast. She makes me learn heaps of things which nobody +can ever need to know.'</p> + +<p>'And I mayn't have a new doll,' said Beryl.</p> + +<p>'And I mayn't stay up later than eight,' said Bobus.</p> + +<p>'And I mayn't eat cake until I've had three pieces of horrid bread and +butter,' said Aline.</p> + +<p>'It's a shame,' said all.</p> + +<p>'Yes,' Bertram went on, 'and my robin wasn't singing this morning.'</p> + +<p>'No more was my linnet,' said Beryl.</p> + +<p>'No more was my chaffinch,' said Bobus.</p> + +<p>'And no more was my blackbird,' said Aline.</p> + +<p>'It's a shame,' said Bertram again; 'everything's against us. Except,' +he added, pulling the card from his pocket, 'except the +Amel—Amelior—except the Ameliorator.'</p> + +<p>'Why, have you got one too?' Aline asked, producing a card exactly like +it, and as she did so Beryl and Bobus also each showed one. On comparing +notes it seemed that all the cards had come in the night in the same +mysterious way.</p> + +<p>The four children looked at each other in silence. They all wanted to +say the same thing, but no one wished to be first. Bertram, as usual, +took the lead: 'Let's go and see the Am—what-d'ye-call-him,' he said.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VIA" id="VIA"></a>VI</h2> + +<h3>THE LITTLE OLD MAN</h3> + + +<p>A few minutes later the children stood hand in hand before the new shop +in the Market Square, and as they did so they suddenly discovered that +their wounded hearts were well again, just as you find that the tooth +stops aching at the moment you reach the dentist's doorstep. They might +even then have run home again, had not Bertram, feeling a little +doubtful of the cure and more than a little inquisitive, peeped into the +shop.</p> + +<p>'Come in, Bertram,' said a blithe voice, 'I've been expecting you all +the morning'; and before he and his companions knew where they were the +door was shut, the four children were inside it, each in a comfortable +chair, and in front of them was absolutely the pleasantest little old +man they had ever seen.</p> + +<p>He had a smooth, ruddy face, and white hair, and large round spectacles +behind which his eyes danced and sparkled, and a comical kindly mouth, +and his clothes were of bright colours that merged into each other as +easily as those of the rainbow and were as certain a sign that the sun +was shining somewhere. Moreover there was in his appearance a vague but +unmistakable likeness to the one person of all persons whom Bertram +loved best, and to the one whom Beryl loved best, and to the one whom +little Aline loved best, and to the one whom Bobus loved best. Yes, it +was very strange, but although all these people were totally different +there was something about the little old man that bore resemblance to +each of them.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VIIA" id="VIIA"></a>VII</h2> + +<h3>THE STOCK IN TRADE</h3> + + +<p>When the children summoned up enough courage to look round, they saw +that the shop was stocked with drawers and bottles and had quite a +business-like appearance. One bottle was labelled 'Mixture for Sulks,' +and another, 'Bad Temper Lotion.' Then there were 'Cross-patch Powders' +and 'Pills against Meddling.' In a prominent place Beryl saw two tall +flasks, one almost full of water and the other almost empty, and the +water in the one that was nearly full was thick and muddy, but that in +the second was clear as crystal. The flask that was nearly full was +lettered 'Tears Shed for Ourselves,' and the other, 'Tears Shed for +Others.' But also there were pleasanter things than these: there were +cupboards full of sweets, shelves of picture books and fairy stories, +and a great store of toys. Also there were many drawers, labelled +encouragingly, 'Rewards for Good Humour,' 'Prizes for Hard Work,' +'Prizes for Hard Play,' 'Presents for Anticipating Wishes,' 'Gifts for +Forgetting Number One,' and so on.</p> + +<p>It took only a short time to see these things, and meanwhile the little +old man was standing in front of the fire, beaming merrily. Then, when +all four had taken a good look, and were feeling rather bad in +consequence, for they could not feel entitled to much beyond pills and +powders, he led them into the inner room—his consulting-room he called +it—saying, 'Come along, little sorrowful ones, and we will inquire into +the great trouble.' And at once they had some difficulty in remembering +their grievance at all, although an hour ago it had seemed to fill the +whole landscape.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VIIIA" id="VIIIA"></a>VIII</h2> + +<h3>THE ADVICE</h3> + + +<p>'Now,' said the Ameliorator, when they were all comfortably inside the +inner room, 'I want to tell you about some of my friends. "Ladies first" +is a good rule: let me tell you about a little girl I once knew,'—here +he laid his hand on Beryl's head—'who had just such soft hair as this, +and just such a gloomy little face.' Here Beryl smiled, in spite of +herself. 'Yes,' added the Ameliorator, 'and just such a smile now and +then. And what do you think the trouble was? Why, although she had no +fewer than fifteen dolls, all given to her by thoughtful friends, she +wanted a new one. These fifteen dolls were very good ones, especially +the faithful old Arthur John, a wooden gentleman of strong affections +and no nose worth mentioning, yet nothing would do but she must have an +aristocratic pink wax lady in white muslin, that hung in a certain shop +window and stared hard all day at the little ragamuffins who pressed +their faces against the pane and said, "O my, ain't she a beauty!" Why +the little girl wanted her I could never understand, because she had no +expression at all, and my young friend had a brother who had declared +that if any more "sappy wax dummies" were brought into the house, he +would put them to bed in the oven. Still, in spite of this terrible +threat, she did want her, and in her despair she came to me about it.</p> + +<p>'Well,' added the Ameliorator, 'what do you think I did? I made her sit +down by this very table, and I opened this very drawer, and I took out +these very pictures, and as I showed them to her' (here he began to lay +before the bewildered Beryl picture after picture of ragged street +children) 'I told her how these little wretches were forced to run about +all day in the gutters, whether it was wet or fine, cold or warm, +because they had no nurseries, and how they could get very little to +eat, and how the only toys they had were bits of wood and old bottles. +And then and there I made so bold as to suggest to my discontented +friend—who of course had every reason to be unhappy, when her mother, +who already had given her so many nice things, refused to buy her an +expensive doll—that if she were not only to stop wishing for any more +new toys, but were to send a few of those she already had to be given +away to some of these children who had none, why I fancied she would not +be altogether miserable any longer. That is what I told her to do, and +that is what she did, and I believe I may truthfully say it was a +wonderful cure.</p> + +<p>'Then—let me see—yes,' the Ameliorator continued more briskly, 'then +there was a boy, or—shall I say, a little man?—who once consulted me. +The difficulty, if I remember rightly, was intellectual. O yes!—he was +convinced that he, being a wise patriarch of eight or nine, knew more +than the lady engaged by his parents to teach him. So he applied to her +a not very respectful nickname and refused to learn the lessons that she +set him, and swaggered about calling her a beast, which is not the right +attitude of a gentleman (although old enough to know everything) towards +a lady, and made himself as unpleasant as he could.</p> + +<p>'By some chance, one of my cards fell into his hands: he read it and was +fascinated by the words, "Bad governesses punished." He came to me to +arrange for the punishment. The best way, I told him, is shocks. There +is nothing like a shock to bring a governess to her senses. "Now, what +is the last thing in the world your governess expects from you?" I +asked. "Why, that you will learn a lesson of your own accord, without +constant jogs from her." So that if he were to do this, I told him, he +would give her a severe shock, and thus punish her.</p> + +<p>'He went away delighted with the plan. Morning after morning he appeared +in the schoolroom with his task all prepared, and every morning the +governess received a new shock. And when I peeped through the window not +long after, there they sat, close together, she happy after her +punishment, and he happy because (only he didn't know this) he had made +her so. For she was unhappy before—very; but young fellows with exalted +ideas on their own judgment and knowledge have no time to observe the +unhappiness of their governesses or parents, have they, Bertram?'</p> + +<p>Bertram did not answer: this shock system of punishment was new to him. +He felt muddled, but he began to think he would try it. He was not, +however, quite in a condition to see the Ameliorator clearly.</p> + +<p>'And little Bobus doesn't like going to bed?' the Ameliorator asked, +turning to Bobus. 'My dear sir, it can be made the best thing in the +world. Let me tell you how to make it so. Directly you get into bed, +begin to think what pleasant little surprise you can give some one on +the next day: any one, mother or father, cousin or playmate, nurse or +beggar in the street. You will find this such an exciting game that you +will run to bed eagerly when the time comes, and, what is more, it makes +you readier to get up. At any rate, Bobus, try it.</p> + +<p>'And little Aline,' the Ameliorator went on, taking Aline's hand and +beaming down upon her with his kindly eyes, which danced more than ever +behind his round spectacles, 'little Aline prefers cake to bread and +butter! Dear, dear, this is very sad. If she eats three pieces of bread +and butter she may have cake, but not till then. Well, I think I should +advise her to eat those three pieces. Little girls who eat only cake +grow up to be weedy and weak, and unable to do half the good things of +life: they can't skate, and they can't dance, and they can't play games. +So I should advise Aline to eat the bread and butter.'</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IXA" id="IXA"></a>IX</h2> + +<h3>THE TOKENS</h3> + + +<p>'Now,' said the little old man, 'you must run home or you'll be late for +dinner. But first let me find some little token of our conversation for +each,' and so saying, he went to the drawer labelled 'Prizes for Hard +Work,' and found something for Bertram; and to the drawer labelled +'Gifts for Forgetting Number One,' and found something for Beryl; and to +the drawer labelled 'Presents for Anticipating Wishes,' and found +something for Bobus; and to the drawer labelled 'Rewards for Hard Play,' +and found something for Aline.</p> + +<p>'Now, good-bye,' said he, holding open the door.</p> + +<p>But Bertram, who was always the leader, did not move. He seemed still to +have something on his mind.</p> + +<p>'No, no,' said the Ameliorator, who was a wonderful thought-reader, 'no, +no, there is nothing to pay. Why, I have had the pleasure of your +company for a whole hour! That's payment enough for any one. Now run +along.'</p> + +<p>'But,' Bertram faltered, still not moving, 'I haven't earned the "Prize +for Hard Work."'</p> + +<p>'No,' said each of the others, 'I haven't earned mine either.'</p> + +<p>'Ah!' said the Ameliorator, 'but you are going to.'</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="XA" id="XA"></a>X</h2> + +<h3>THE RETURN</h3> + + +<p>Hand in hand, silently, the four children walked through the city. And +when each one reached home, there, in the branches of the tree before +the house, was its bird in full song.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="The_Schoolboys_Apprentice" id="The_Schoolboys_Apprentice"></a>The Schoolboy's Apprentice</h2> + + + +<h4><i>TO L. F. G.</i></h4> + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + +<p>Once upon a time there was a schoolboy called Chimp. Chimp was not his +name: his name was Alexander Joseph Chemmle. Chimp was short for +chimpanzee, an animal which his schoolfellows agreed that he was like.</p> + +<p>Chimp usually spent his holidays in his uncle's family; but one summer +he travelled on a visit to his father, who was British Consul in a +foreign port, so far away that the boy had only a few days at home +before it was time again to join the steamer for England.</p> + +<p>Chimp, who was always adventurous, had been at sea for only a week on +the return journey, when one evening at dusk he lost his hold as he was +clambering out to the end of the main crosstrees, and fell overboard. +The other passengers were listening to a concert in the saloon +('screeching' Chimp had called it, when he took refuge in the chief +engineer's room), and, work being over, the crew were for'ard smoking, +so that there was no one except the first officer and the man at the +wheel to hear the shout that Chimp sent up from the water. As a matter +of fact both men heard it, but it caused them to do no more than say to +themselves at the same moment, 'There's that boy again! Up to some +mischief, I'll be bound.' No help, therefore, came to Chimp. The great +black ship glided by, the screw threshed the water into blinding foam, +and when he could see and think again, Chimp was alone in the ocean.</p> + +<p>Chimp was a good swimmer. He struck out at once vigorously in the +direction of the island which they had passed at sundown. The sea was as +smooth as a pond and quite warm, and after several minutes had passed, +the boy turned over on his back and floated comfortably, moving his arms +just enough to give him an impetus towards the shore. Although he was +upset by the accident which had so suddenly substituted the water for +the ship (and it was nearing supper time, and there were always ices for +supper!), Chimp was not a boy at all given to fear, and he could think +of his new plight with composure. His first calm thought was regret for +the mongoose which he was taking back to school, 'although,' as he said +to himself, 'the chances are, Porker wouldn't let me keep it,' Porker +being the way in which Chimp spoke of Dr. Cyril Bigley Plowden, +Principal of Witherson College. His second feeling was keenness to play +Robinson Crusoe in earnest. Chimp and other boys had often on +half-holidays made believe that an island in the river was Juan +Fernandez, but the game usually began with one fight to decide who +should be Robinson, and ended with another to check the arrogance of +Friday. Now, however, he was but an hour or so from an uninhabited +island (of course it was uninhabited) and bothered by no rival for chief +honours. He decided that to fall into the sea from a steamer at night +was a lark. But a little while afterwards he thought of sharks and +remembered, with something of a pang, good times in England; then he +wondered what would happen on the ship when they missed him; then he +glowed at the anticipation of the other boys' envy when they learned +where he had been; then he thought of sharks again; and then his feet +touched the bottom.</p> + +<p>When Chimp at last crawled out of the water, he was nigh dead beat. In +the soft still light which the moon poured down he could see beyond the +beach a dark strip which seemed to promise a bed. He staggered blindly +over the stones to this refuge, found that it was grass, and, sinking +upon it, was in a moment asleep.</p> + +<p>The sun was high and hot when Chimp awoke. For a moment he looked around +him bewildered, wondering why the dream would not finish: then he +remembered everything. At the same moment he was conscious, as he +afterwards expressed it, that he had had nothing to eat for a hundred +years. Chimp stood up, yawned the stiffness out of his bones, and set +forth to seek for food and claim his kingdom. He made at once for the +highest ground and gathered the island in a bird's-eye view. It seemed +to be about eight miles long and three broad, mainly rock, bare and red +as a brick. There were a few trees and some wide patches of rank grass. +Not a sign of human life was to be seen, but swift green lizards shot +across the ground at Chimp's feet, a million grasshoppers shrilled into +his ears, and white gulls with cruel eyes hovered and wheeled above him. +The prospect did not cheer Robinson Crusoe II., but he set out for the +interior of the island, searching every miniature valley for a spring, +every tree and shrub for fruit. But he sought in vain. Then recollecting +stories of the toothsomeness of turtles' eggs baked in the sand, Chimp +turned to the shore again and explored the coast. At the end of three +hours he said disgustedly, 'What a liar Ballantyne was!' and was just +sinking down exhausted, when his heart gave a big <i>plump!</i> and stood +still, for there before him was a well-trodden path.</p> + +<p>At first, hungry as he was, Chimp's feeling was grief at the discovery +that after all the island was not uninhabited, but his regret soon faded +before the anticipation of the meal he would devour in the abode to +which the pathway led, and he struck into it with new vigour, taking the +inland direction. The path rose with every step. At last, a mile or so +from the sea, it turned abruptly round a boulder, and Chimp suddenly +found himself in the presence of an elderly man with a long grey beard, +who was sitting at a table in the entrance of a cave, writing.</p> + +<p>The meeting seemed to be the most unexpected thing that had ever +happened to either of them, for the elderly man rose with a start that +upset both ink and table, and Chimp caught himself looking round for +something to cling to for support. Not finding anything, he sat down on +the ground and stared at the elderly man. He would have liked to have +gone forward to pick up the ink-bottle, but dared not, on account of a +peculiar feeling in his knees. Meanwhile the elderly man stared at the +boy, and Chimp wondered if he ever would speak, and if it would be in +English when he did. After a long pause the elderly man picked up the +ink. Then looking at Chimp still more curiously through his spectacles, +he spoke.</p> + +<p>'What are you?' he asked, in good English.</p> + +<p>'My name,' said Chimp, 'is Alexander Joseph Chemmle.'</p> + +<p>'No, no,' the elderly man replied, 'I mean, what are you—what? Not a +boy, are you? Not really and truly a boy! Oh say, say you are a boy!'</p> + +<p>'Yes,' said Chimp, although for the moment, so intense and unreasonable +was the other's excitement about the matter, he almost doubted it. 'Yes, +I'm a boy.'</p> + +<p>'A boy! a boy!' the elderly man exclaimed joyfully. 'Eureka!' Then he +grew calmer, and continued: 'Dear me, this is very interesting. A most +fortunate chance! A boy, you say. How extremely happy an accident. Now +what kind of boy might you be?'</p> + +<p>Chimp was puzzled. 'I suppose,' he thought, 'I ought to call myself a +good boy, and yet that isn't exactly how Porker would describe me. And +what is more, good boys are such saps.' Then he spoke aloud: 'Well, sir, +I'm a fairish specimen of a boy, I think.'</p> + +<p>'Good!' said the elderly man. 'Good! An average boy. So much the better. +And what does it feel like to be a boy?'</p> + +<p>'Whew!' said Chimp to himself, 'I came for breakfast, and all I seem to +be getting is an exam.' However, he did his best to answer the question. +'Why, sir,' he said aloud, 'as long as you don't get too many lines and +swishings, it feels good to be a boy. But swishing makes it feel bad +sometimes.'</p> + +<p>'Lines?' inquired the other. 'Swishings? What are they?'</p> + +<p>'Why,' said Chimp, 'when Porker canes you, that's swishing, and lines +are passages from Virgil which you have to copy out if you make +howlers—I mean, if you make mistakes.'</p> + +<p>'Yes, yes,' said the elderly man, a little vaguely. 'And so it's good to +be a boy?' he added.</p> + +<p>A happy thought struck Chimp. 'It is good,' he replied; 'but there are +other times when it's bad, besides those I mentioned. When—when you're +hungry, for instance.'</p> + +<p>'Ah!' exclaimed the elderly man, rising from the table. 'I was +forgetting. You must pardon me, Alexander Joseph Chemmle. I have, I +fear, nothing to offer you but biscuits and tinned meats. Do you care +for tinned meats? I keep most kinds.'</p> + +<p>'I like bloater paste,' Chimp said. 'I always take a pot or two back to +school.'</p> + +<p>'Ah!' cried his host eagerly, 'you like bloater paste best? That's +famous! So do I. A community of taste!'</p> + +<p>He disappeared into the cave, and in a minute or so came forth again, +bearing the bloater paste and a plate in one hand, and the biscuits and +a knife in the other. 'Now,' he said, 'fall to, and while you are eating +these I must try to find something else. Tinned pears—do you like +them?'</p> + +<p>Chimp mumbled that he did. He was eating with more enjoyment than he +ever had eaten in his life. Ambrosia was nothing to bloater paste.</p> + +<p>'It is wonderful—our tastes coincide in everything,' said the elderly +man as he entered the cave again. He returned with a tin of pears and +some marmalade, a jug of water and a glass. Then he sat on a camp stool +and observed his guest.</p> + +<p>It was not until Chimp was well forward with the pears that his host +spoke again. 'I am sorry, Alexander Joseph Chemmle,' he said, 'to have +kept you waiting so long, for I take it that this is not your customary +appetite—that you were, in fact, unusually, if not painfully, hungry. +But I was so interested by the sight of a real boy that I could think of +nothing else. You see, I have never met with a boy before.'</p> + +<p>Chimp opened his eyes as wide almost as his mouth. 'But,' he began in +his astonishment, 'they are as common as dirt, boys are. There's heaps +of them—loads.'</p> + +<p>'True,' the other made answer, 'true. But when one abandons the world, +and, embracing the profession of the eremite, devotes one's life to +solitude and reflection, one is deprived of the pleasure of intercourse +with so attractive a personality as that of the average boy.'</p> + +<p>'Ye-es,' dubiously from Chimp. 'But,' he added, 'you were a boy yourself +once.'</p> + +<p>'No,' the Hermit made reply. 'Never.'</p> + +<p>'Never a boy!' Chimp exclaimed. 'Well, that beats everything.'</p> + +<p>'Never,' repeated the recluse. 'You see,' he remarked in explanation, 'I +was articled by my parents to a hermit at a very tender age—to the +learned man, in fact, who preceded me in the tenancy of this modest +cell. We plunged immediately into the fascinating study of metaphysics, +and the period of boyhood slipped by unnoticed.'</p> + +<p>Chimp whistled,—he had no words adequate to the occasion.</p> + +<p>'For many years,' the Hermit continued, 'I did not feel the loss of this +experience, being deeply engrossed in other subjects; but now, in the +fall of life, I find myself regretting it keenly. Much as I love my +studies, much as I am attached to the solitary life, I sometimes think +it a finer thing to have been a boy even than to have been a hermit.'</p> + +<p>Chimp thought it would be kind of him to say something cheery, yet could +hit upon nothing but, 'Oh no, not at all,' just as if the Hermit had +apologised for treading on his toe; yet it seemed to please the old man.</p> + +<p>'However,' he broke off, 'this is by the way. Come, Alexander Joseph +Chemmle, tell me about your adventures; how did you find your way to +this island? How is it you are alone? Tell me everything.'</p> + +<p>Chimp, wincing a little at the appalling formality of the Hermit's mode +of address, began. By the time his story was finished it was evening, +for the Hermit asked numberless questions which sent Chimp off on +numberless side tracks of narrative. At the end of the recital the +bloater paste was produced again, and Chimp again ate heartily.</p> + +<p>'Now,' said the Hermit, 'I will show you something of the island.'</p> + +<p>So saying, he took his staff and they set forth. First they visited the +spring whence the Hermit brought water, and then climbing to a peak of +rock, the Hermit described the island as it lay beneath them.</p> + +<p>'There,' said he finally, indicating the little creek to which the +footpath led, 'that is where the boat lands that once a year brings me +my provisions. It puts off from my Aunt Amelia's yacht—<i>The Tattooed +Quaker</i>. My Aunt Amelia is the only relative that remains to me. It is +she who supplies the tinned meats and the pears. She really has +admirable taste, although her choice in names may be a little fantastic. +In addition to the provisions, it is my aunt's custom to send a letter +beseeching me to return in the yacht to England, and declaring that if I +do not, that particular supply of food will be the last. For forty years +she has done this. She is a noble woman, my Aunt Amelia.'</p> + +<p>'When is the boat due?' Chimp asked, thinking more of its possible +effect upon himself than upon the Hermit.</p> + +<p>'Soon, soon,' the old man replied, with something very like a sigh. 'In +a fortnight's time, in fact.'</p> + +<p>'What a pity!' said Chimp. 'And I say, sir,' he added, 'how decent to be +you. Only there ought to be some niggers.'</p> + +<p>The Hermit sighed. They walked back without speaking, and not ten +minutes had passed before Chimp was sound asleep in a corner of the +cave, while the Hermit lay gazing at the stars.</p> + +<p>On awaking, Chimp found that the cave was empty. For a moment he thought +himself still dreaming, but the table laid for breakfast recalled him to +facts, and he fell to thinking of the Hermit. 'Rum old beggar!' he +mused. 'A screw loose somewhere, I guess.' When the Hermit returned, it +was plain that the old man had something on his mind, as the saying is. +He spoke not at all at breakfast, except, when laying the table, to +remark that potted ham and chicken make a pleasing variety upon bloater +paste. But after breakfast, placing one seat in the shade for Chimp and +one for himself, he talked.</p> + +<p>'I have been thinking deeply, Alexander Joseph Chemmle,' he began. +'During the night I have reviewed my life, and now more than ever I am +conscious of the limiting influence exerted upon a philosopher by the +loss of boyhood. The suspicion has been with me for years: it is now a +certainty. You are not likely, my young friend, to be with me long, for +<i>The Tattooed Quaker</i> will, of course, carry you back to England next +week. But in the intervening time I want you, so far as is within your +power, to make a boy of me. I put myself unreservedly in your hands. +Consider me your apprentice. Will you do this?' The Hermit watched +Chimp's face anxiously.</p> + +<p>Chimp was staggered completely. A screw loose, he had thought; but +surely it was the height of madness for a man to wish to be a boy again. +Chimp and his companions spent a large part of their time in wishing to +be men: the other side was not to be believed. But he pulled himself +together with the thought that to humour this old lunatic might be +funny, and would last only a week. After all, to find a cracked man on +the island was better than to find no man at all, now that Ballantyne +had been proved to be so wrong. And just then the boy caught a glimpse +of the Hermit's anxious eager eyes. 'All right,' he said quickly, 'I'm +game. But it'll be rather difficult, you know.'</p> + +<p>'Difficult!' exclaimed the Hermit, with an expression of mingled pain +and alarm. 'How? Not seriously, I trust?'</p> + +<p>'Oh no!' said Chimp; 'but you're rather old, you see, and boys are not +in the habit of wearing beards three feet long; although,' he added +encouragingly, noting the look of disappointment on the Hermit's face, +'I don't see why they shouldn't. Why, there was a fellow at our school +who had whiskers before he was fourteen, and we shaved them too. Tied +him down and cut off one side one day and the other the next. After that +he bought a razor.'</p> + +<p>'Is—is that action typical of the boy?' the Hermit asked.</p> + +<p>'Well, they get up to larks now and then,' Chimp admitted.</p> + +<p>'As time is short,' said the Hermit, 'I am disposed to begin this +morning—at once. That is not too soon for you, I hope, Alexander Joseph +Ch——?'</p> + +<p>'Oh, please don't,' Chimp interrupted. 'You know, boys don't call each +other by all their names like that; they either stick to the last one or +invent a nickname.'</p> + +<p>'I am sorry to have hurt your feelings,' said the Hermit. 'If you will +tell me your nickname I will call you by it.'</p> + +<p>'I think,' replied Chimp, unwilling to explain his own, 'that perhaps +we'd better begin now and give each other fresh ones.'</p> + +<p>'Very well,' said the Hermit, after a minute's thought, 'I shall call +you Simian, or, for the sake of brevity, Sim.'</p> + +<p>'Simeon?' cried Chimp. 'Oh, that's not the thing at all! A nickname +should describe a fellow, you know—it shouldn't be just another +ordinary name.'</p> + +<p>'Yes,' replied his apprentice, 'and I mean to call you Sim, an +abbreviation of Simian. And what will you call me?'</p> + +<p>Chimp pondered awhile. 'I shall call you,' he said at length, +'Billykins, because of your long goat's beard.'</p> + +<p>And thus began the Hermit's apprenticeship.</p> + +<p>'It is too hot for footer,' said Chimp, after he had collected his +thoughts, 'so we will make a start with a little cricket practice. +Cricket,' he explained, 'is a game—the best game in the world. You +ought to see W. G. and Ranji. But of course you don't know who they are. +Oh dear, oh dear, what you are missing out here! W. G., that's W. G. +Grace, the champion of the world. Your beard, Billykins, must have been +rather like his a few years ago. And Ranji, that's Ranjitsinhji.'</p> + +<p>'Yes, yes,' the Hermit remarked feebly, depressed by the weight of his +stupendous ignorance.</p> + +<p>Chimp went on with fine authority. 'Now, while I am cramming this sock +with stuff to make a ball, you be sharpening these sticks for wickets. +You've got a knife, I suppose?'</p> + +<p>The Hermit admitted that he had not.</p> + +<p>'What!' cried Chimp; 'no knife? Why, you'll never be a boy without a +knife. Let me look at your pockets?'</p> + +<p>The Hermit had but one pocket, and a handkerchief was all it held.</p> + +<p>'Awfully clean,' was Chimp's contemptuous comment. 'And nothing else? +Oh, this will never do! Look at mine now,' and turning out his pockets, +he displayed a double-bladed knife containing several implements, +including a corkscrew and an attachment for extracting stones from +horses' feet, a piece of string, a watch spring, twenty or thirty shot, +a button, a magnet, a cog-wheel, a pencil, a match-box, a case of +foreign stamps all stuck together with salt water, a whistle, a +halfpenny with a hole in it, and a soaked and swollen cigar which the +Captain had given him.</p> + +<p>'Are all these things quite necessary?' the Hermit asked humbly.</p> + +<p>'No,' said Chimp, 'not quite all. The knife is, and the string is, and a +fellow likes his smoke, you know. Collecting stamps is rather decent, +but you needn't unless you want to. There's butterflies and birds' eggs, +if you like. The other things are useful: the more you have the better +for you.'</p> + +<p>'String,' said the Hermit, 'I possess—but no pocket-knife. But if you +permit it, I will carry my table-knife in future. 'Tis a simple weapon, +I know: but on the other hand you see that on this island the +opportunities of extracting stones from horses' hoofs are rare.'</p> + +<p>'I suppose it must do,' said Chimp doubtfully. 'But you must add a few +other things, or we shan't have anything to swap. Boys are great at +swapping, you know.'</p> + +<p>'Swapping?' the Hermit asked.</p> + +<p>'Yes: when you want one thing, giving another for it. For instance, if +you had a white rat' (the Hermit shuddered) 'and I gave you a brass +cannon for it, that would be a swap.'</p> + +<p>'Very well,' the Hermit replied seriously, 'I will add a few things; +but, if you don't mind, not rats of any colour, nor in fact any live +stock.'</p> + +<p>'Just as you like,' said the magnanimous Chimp. 'You wouldn't do for +Billy Lincolne though: he usually carries half a dozen frogs in his +trousers' pockets.'</p> + +<p>When the cricket gear was complete, Chimp stepped out twenty-two yards +and pitched the stumps. 'You go in first,' he said.</p> + +<p>The Hermit seized the bat.</p> + +<p>'Now all you have to do at first,' Chimp continued, 'is to keep the ball +out of the wicket. Hit it any way you like, and hold your bat straight.'</p> + +<p>The Hermit obeyed to the letter. To Chimp's intense astonishment he +punished the bowling all round, pulling off balls to square leg in a +shameless fashion.</p> + +<p>Chimp was kept busy, and at last he grew almost vexed. 'Well, you mayn't +have much science,' he cried, as, nearly out of breath, he flung himself +down after some miles of running, 'but you've got a gorgeous eye. Why, +you hit everything. You've played before, haven't you?' he added +suspiciously.</p> + +<p>The Hermit smiled again. 'A little,' he admitted. 'Yes, my late +instructor, the sage to whom I was confided by my parents many, many +years ago, he and I occasionally had a game together. It was our only +recreation. I thought it hardly worth while to mention it, expecting +that all skill had left me.'</p> + +<p>'By jingo! though, it hasn't,' Chimp exclaimed. 'You're a regular W. G. +in your way. But, I say, another time you know how to do a thing you +might let a fellow know first.'</p> + +<p>'This is too silly,' was Chimp's persistent thought during the next few +days, but he kept up the game of make-believe like a hero. As a matter +of fact, it was sound amusement to explore the island and plunge on +sudden impulses into a score of high-spirited enterprises, although the +presence of the old man panting at his side touched him rather sadly now +and then. The Hermit, however, endured stolidly and pluckily, and +neither of them ever let the time appear to drag.</p> + +<p>Chimp and his apprentice bathed together, and hunted for anemones among +the rocks; they gave chase to butterflies and lizards; they told +stories; they even pretended to be Robinson Crusoe and Friday, the part +of Friday falling to the Hermit.</p> + +<p>'You see, Billykins,' Chimp said, 'you are better suited to the part: +you can make such a whacking footprint.'</p> + +<p>'I think I am progressing well, Simian,' remarked Chimp's apprentice at +breakfast one morning, 'although I must admit that many impulses and +movements that come naturally to you are acquired by me with difficulty. +Last evening's attempt at leap-frog, for example, has left me so stiff +that I can hardly move, and I assure you that it has never before +occurred to me to climb that tree all the years I have known it. Perhaps +in a week or so, when my hands are healed, I may try again. But I can +see, Sim, that it must be very good to be a boy—very, very good.'</p> + +<p>'Why yes, Billykins,' Chimp broke in, 'but you don't know really +anything about it yet. And I'm afraid you can't know on this island. +There isn't the company and there isn't the means. I can't even make you +an apple-pie bed, when you sleep in a single blanket; and a booby-trap +needs a door. And when there are only two people, and no one else to +laugh, it's no fun to stick a cactus in a fellow's chair. Tuck, too! +What do you know about tuck? What can you know about tuck when there's +no shop for chocolate and Turkish Delight and things like that? Tinned +stuff is all very well, but it gets jolly tedious. And birds'-nesting, +and ratting, and setting night lines, and dodging game-keepers, and +breaking into orchards! You haven't even elastic to make a catty with, +or so simple a contrivance as a fish-hook. Still we might rig up a bow +and arrow.'</p> + +<p>'But,' the Hermit objected, 'there is nothing to shoot.'</p> + +<p>'Oh yes!' said Chimp, 'sea-gulls.'</p> + +<p>'We can't eat sea-gulls,' his apprentice replied. Then anxiously, 'Boys +don't eat sea-gulls, do they?'</p> + +<p>'Why, no, Billykins; but that isn't the thing. Bringing them down is the +thing. It's sport.'</p> + +<p>That evening after tea, Chimp approached his apprentice with a troubled +expression.</p> + +<p>'I think I ought to tell you, Billykins,' he goaded himself to say, +'that some boys fall in love. Not all, mind. I never did it myself—I +think it's footle—but lots and lots do. I suppose you'd like to try it, +you're so thorough; though I don't see how you're going to manage +exactly.'</p> + +<p>'You mean,' said the Hermit, 'on an island so poor in opportunities? +Yes, it would be difficult. Still, give me the outline.'</p> + +<p>'Well, Billykins, it isn't very clear,' said Chimp. 'I believe though, +that the fellow feels sort of jolly inside while it's going on. But it +never lasts long.'</p> + +<p>'And it's not compulsory?' the Hermit asked in some trepidation.</p> + +<p>'Oh no, Billy, not at all.'</p> + +<p>'Then we will dismiss love along with sport,' was the Hermit's decision.</p> + +<p>Thus, in games and rambles and conversation, the time passed by, until +it was the evening before the day that would bring <i>The Tattooed +Quaker</i>, and Chimp and his apprentice were sitting before the cave, +watching the sinking sun.</p> + +<p>'Well,' said the Hermit, 'only a few more hours, Sim, and you will be on +the way home again. Then I must to work once more. My great work on Man +and his place in Society, scientifically considered, awaits me. But I +shall miss you, Sim,' the old man added; 'you have been a very pleasant +chapter in my life. Don't forget me altogether, will you; and you'll pay +my Aunt Amelia a visit, won't you, and tell her about me?'</p> + +<p>Chimp had a little difficulty in replying. He felt girlish, that is to +say, gulpy and tearful. At last, 'Why don't you come back too?' he +asked.</p> + +<p>'I?' said the Hermit. 'Oh no, there is no place for Hermits in your +country.'</p> + +<p>'I don't know about that,' said Chimp, speaking more naturally again. +'You might make a lot of money showing yourself in caravans at fairs. +People would go miles to see a hermit. I paid a penny once to see a fat +woman, and there was no end of a squash in the tent. You must come. I'll +take you to my uncle's, where I live in the vacs. and Jim—that's my +cousin—Jim and me'll give you a ripping time.'</p> + +<p>The Hermit smiled sadly. 'No, no,' he said. After a short silence he +spoke again. 'Tell me, Sim—I ask merely out of curiosity—are boys +always contented with their surroundings?'</p> + +<p>'Not by a long chalk,' Chimp answered. 'They're always running away.'</p> + +<p>'Ah!' said the Hermit. 'How often have you run away?'</p> + +<p>'Well, not at all, so far,' said Chimp, 'although Goring minor and I did +get all ready to bunk once, only Mother Porker copped us on the landing. +But we meant it, I can tell you. We were going to walk to Portsmouth, +sleeping under hay ricks, and hide ourselves as stowaways on board a +man-of-war, and show up when we got to sea, and do something heroic to +please the Captain, and after that win loads of prize-money and come +back covered with glory. Boys often do that in books. But old Mother +Porker copped us on the landing.'</p> + +<p>'Bed-time,' said the Hermit.</p> + +<p>When they rose the next morning, there, in the offing, heading straight +for the island, was <i>The Tattooed Quaker</i>. They hurried to the peak, and +the Hermit waved his handkerchief. The signal was seen on deck, and an +answering flag scurried up to the mast-head. After breakfast Chimp and +his apprentice walked down to the creek to welcome the yacht's boat.</p> + +<p>The Captain looked at Chimp in amazement. 'What, Master Augustus!' he +said when he had shaken hands with the Hermit and delivered Aunt +Amelia's letter, 'what! have you got a pupil, then?'</p> + +<p>'No,' replied the Hermit, 'he's not my pupil, he's your passenger'; and +so saying, he introduced Chimp, and then stood aside to see what his +aunt had to say; while the crew waited for the Captain's orders to move +the stores from the boat to the cave.</p> + +<p>When the Hermit had finished reading, he returned the letter to its +envelope and slipped it into his pocket.</p> + +<p>'Well, Master Augustus, are you coming back with us?' said the Captain, +exactly as he had asked the question for the past forty years.</p> + +<p>The Hermit laughed in negative reply, exactly as he had laughed once a +year for the past forty years.</p> + +<p>'Now then, my men, be quick,' said the Captain.</p> + +<p>In the boat was a large hamper in which to convey the stores over the +rocks to the cave. Two of the sailors held it at each end, and the +Hermit accompanied them, while Chimp and the Captain strolled away +together. Three times the hamper was borne from the boat to the cell. +There then remained only a dozen or so of parcels, which the men might +easily carry in their hands. This time the Hermit did not accompany +them.</p> + +<p>When the last of the stores were safely within the cave the boatswain +blew his whistle as a signal that all was ready, and Chimp and the +Captain of <i>The Tattooed Quaker</i> hurried back to the creek.</p> + +<p>'Where is Master Augustus?' the Captain inquired. 'The young gentleman +wants to say good-bye to him.'</p> + +<p>'He must be in the cave,' said Chimp. 'I'll run and see.'</p> + +<p>But the cave was empty. Chimp climbed the rock before the entrance and +called, 'Bi-i-illykins, Bi-i-illykins!' No answer. 'I must have missed +him on his way back to the creek,' he thought, and hurried to the shore +again.</p> + +<p>'Be quick!' cried the Captain. 'Time's up!'</p> + +<p>'But I can't find him,' Chimp called, floundering from boulder to +boulder.</p> + +<p>'Can't find him?' echoed the Captain. 'That's very rum. I suppose he +wants to avoid the pain of parting. Come along; we can't stay any longer +now.'</p> + +<p>So with a heavy heart Chimp took his place in the boat and watched how +with every stroke of the oars the distance widened between himself and +the island.</p> + +<p>'Weigh the anchor!' cried the Captain, the moment they were on board.</p> + +<p><i>The Tattooed Quaker</i> was a superb yacht, and in the ardour of +exploration Chimp forgot the Hermit and everything else. He examined the +cabin and the berths, he made friends with the steward, he descended +into the lazarette, where peering into the refrigerator, he found half a +game pie, and forthwith devoured it. He conversed learnedly with the +engineers about the size of the cylinders; he decided which hammock +would best minister to his own comfort; he overhauled the Captain's +stock of books, and by the time these duties were accomplished <i>The +Tattooed Quaker</i> was well out to sea, and the island was only a thin +line on the horizon. And then a feeling of sadness for the loss of poor +old Billykins, left there all alone again, took hold of the boy, and he +retired dismally to his hammock to mope.</p> + +<p>After dinner, however, at which meal he revived marvellously, he was in +gay enough spirits to tell the story of the Hermit's apprenticeship. The +Captain was in ecstasies. 'What a yarn for the old lady!' he remarked +again and again. 'What a yarn!'</p> + +<p>Suddenly, as they sat in the darkling cabin, there appeared in the +doorway a figure which seemed in the gloom to resemble an elderly man +with a long grey beard.</p> + +<p>'Mercy! What's that?' the Captain shouted, leaping from his chair and +drawing back. 'Who are you? What do you want?'</p> + +<p>The figure took a step into the room. 'Simian,' it said, 'don't you +recognise me?'</p> + +<p>'Why, it's Billykins!' cried Chimp, running forward and seizing the +Hermit's hand.</p> + +<p>'Great Heavens! Master Augustus!' exclaimed the Captain. 'Where did you +spring from?'</p> + +<p>'From the hamper!' said the Hermit.</p> + +<p>Chimp and the Captain stared at each other for a moment, and +then—'What!' roared the Captain, 'a stowaway! Well, you're something +like an apprentice, you are!' And he smote the table till the ship +trembled, and laughed like the north wind.</p> + +<p>The Hermit waited patiently till the storm abated, while Chimp gazed at +him in wonderment and admiration.</p> + +<p>Then, in the lulls of the Captain's merriment, he explained. 'You see,' +he said, 'this boy has changed me considerably. I see things with new +eyes. And when I was standing there by the boat, the desire to run away +and be for ever quit of the island and solitude came strongly upon me.'</p> + +<p>'Oh, what a model apprentice!' the Captain exclaimed.</p> + +<p>'So,' continued the Hermit, a little abashed, 'well—so I crawled into +the hamper.'</p> + +<p>'Hooray!' cried Chimp; it's splendid. But aren't you hungry?'</p> + +<p>'Hungry?' said the Captain, 'I should think he is. Steward!' he called, +'bring some supper for Master Augustus.'</p> + +<p>The steward came running into the cabin and stood transfixed—all eyes. +His appearance set the Captain off again; 'Don't be scared,' he said; +'he's alive, right enough.'</p> + +<p>'I didn't see the gentleman come aboard,' the steward found words to +say.</p> + +<p>'No,' said the Captain, 'no more didn't I. No more didn't no one. Master +Augustus has his own way of coming aboard.'</p> + +<p>At this the Hermit laughed too, and the spell being broken, the steward +brought supper as to a man of flesh and blood.</p> + +<p>'So I'm a runaway, Sim,' the Hermit said cheerily when he had finished; +'and there was no Mother Porker to catch me on the landing.'</p> + +<p>'Catch you? No! You're A1 at it!' Chimp replied.</p> + +<p>'Yes,' resumed the Hermit, stretching his limbs, 'we're going to be +comrades again. But when we're in England, mind, no fairs, Sim, no +caravans.'</p> + +<p>Chimp laughed.</p> + +<p>'And we'll go and see Ranji,' said the Hermit.</p> + +<h4>THE END</h4> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="The_Dumpy_Books_for_Children" id="The_Dumpy_Books_for_Children"></a>The Dumpy Books for Children.</h2> + +<p>Selected by <span class="smcap">E. V. Lucas.</span></p> + +<p>I. <span class="smcap">The Flamp, The Ameliorator, and The Schoolboy's Apprentice</span>, <i>by E. V. +LUCAS</i></p> + +<p>II. <span class="smcap">Mrs. Turner's Cautionary Stories</span></p> + +<p>III. <span class="smcap">The Bad Family</span>, <i>by Mrs. Fenwick</i></p> + +<p>IV. <span class="smcap">Little Black Sambo</span>, <i>by Helen Bannerman</i>. With Pictures in colours +by the Author</p> + +<p>V. <span class="smcap">The Bountiful Lady</span>, <i>by Thomas Cobb</i></p> + +<p>VI. <span class="smcap">A Cat Book</span>, Portraits <i>by H. Officer Smith</i>, Characteristics <i>by E. +V. LUCAS</i></p> + + +<div class="figleft"> +<img src="images/illus2.jpg" alt=""/> +</div> + +<div class="figright"> +<img src="images/illus3.jpg" alt=""/> +</div> + +<div>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 30445 ***</div> +</body> +</html> diff --git a/30445-h/images/cover.jpg b/30445-h/images/cover.jpg Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..db9e59a --- /dev/null +++ b/30445-h/images/cover.jpg diff --git a/30445-h/images/illus1.jpg b/30445-h/images/illus1.jpg Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..0131dd8 --- /dev/null +++ b/30445-h/images/illus1.jpg diff --git a/30445-h/images/illus2.jpg b/30445-h/images/illus2.jpg Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..3b6c9d8 --- /dev/null +++ b/30445-h/images/illus2.jpg diff --git a/30445-h/images/illus3.jpg b/30445-h/images/illus3.jpg Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..536d622 --- /dev/null +++ b/30445-h/images/illus3.jpg diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. 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V. Lucas + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Flamp, The Ameliorator, and The Schoolboy's Apprentice + +Author: E. V. Lucas + +Release Date: November 10, 2009 [EBook #30445] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE FLAMP *** + + + + +Produced by David Edwards, Mary Meehan and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This +file was produced from images generously made available +by The Internet Archive) + + + + + + +</pre> + + + +<div class="figcenter"> +<img src="images/cover.jpg" alt=""/> +</div> + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + + +<h1>The Flamp, The Ameliorator, and <br /> The Schoolboy's Apprentice</h1> + +<h2>By E. V. LUCAS</h2> + + +<h4>LONDON: GRANT RICHARDS<br /> +1900</h4> + +<h4><i>First printed October</i> 1897<br /> +<i>Reprinted December</i> 1897<br /> +" <i>August</i> 1899<br /> +" <i>December</i> 1900</h4> + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + +<div class="figcenter"> +<img src="images/illus1.jpg" alt=""/> +</div> + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + + + +<h2><i>CONTENTS</i></h2> + +<!-- Autogenerated TOC. Modify or delete as required. --> +<p> +<a href="#The_Flamp">The Flamp</a><br /> +<a href="#I">I</a><br /> +<a href="#II">II</a><br /> +<a href="#III">III</a><br /> +<a href="#IV">IV</a><br /> +<a href="#V">V</a><br /> +<a href="#VI">VI</a><br /> +<a href="#VII">VII</a><br /> +<a href="#VIII">VIII</a><br /> +<a href="#IX">IX</a><br /> +<a href="#X">X</a><br /> +<a href="#XI">XI</a><br /><br /> +<a href="#The_Ameliorator">The Ameliorator</a><br /><br /> +<a href="#IA">I</a><br /> +<a href="#IIA">II</a><br /> +<a href="#IIIA">III</a><br /> +<a href="#IVA">IV</a><br /> +<a href="#VA">V</a><br /> +<a href="#VIA">VI</a><br /> +<a href="#VIIA">VII</a><br /> +<a href="#VIIIA">VIII</a><br /> +<a href="#IXA">IX</a><br /> +<a href="#XA">X</a><br /><br /> +<a href="#The_Schoolboys_Apprentice">The Schoolboy's Apprentice</a><br /><br /> +<a href="#The_Dumpy_Books_for_Children">The Dumpy Books for Children.</a><br /> +</p> +<!-- End Autogenerated TOC. --> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="The_Flamp" id="The_Flamp"></a>The Flamp</h2> + + +<h4><i>TO MOLLY AND HILDA</i>.</h4> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><i>That sunny afternoon in May,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>How stealthily we crept away,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>We three—(Good things are done in threes:</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>That is, good things in threes are done</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>When you make two and I make one.)—</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>To hatch our small conspiracies!</i><br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><i>Between the blossomy apple-trees</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>(You recollect?) we sped, and then</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>Safe in the green heart of the wood</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>We breathed again.</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>The purple flood the bluebells made</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>Washed round about us where we stood,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>While voices, where the others played,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>Assured us we were not pursued.</i><br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><i>A fence to climb or wriggle through,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>A strip of meadow wet with dew</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>To cross, and lo! before us flared</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>The clump of yellow gorse we shared</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>With five young blackbirds and their mother.</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>There, close beside our partners' nest,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>And free from Mr. C. (that pest!),</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>And careless of the wind and damp,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>We framed the story of</i> The Flamp.<br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><i>And O! Collaborators kind,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>The wish is often in my mind,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>That we, in just such happy plight,—</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>With Chanctonbury Ring in sight,—</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>Some day may frame another.</i><br /></span> +</div><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">E. V. L.<br /></span> +<span class="i0">1896.<br /></span> +</div></div> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="I" id="I"></a>I</h2> + + +<p>Once upon a time there dwelt in a far country two children, a sister and +a brother, named Tilsa and Tobene. Tilsa was twelve and Tobene was ten, +and they had grown up, as it were, hand in hand. Their father died when +Tobene was only a little piece of pink dimpled dough, and when their +mother died too, a few years after, old Alison was told to pack up the +things and journey with Tilsa and Tobene to the children's grandfather, +the Liglid (or Lord Mayor) of Ule, whom they had never yet seen.</p> + +<p>Old Alison was their nurse, and she had been their father's nurse before +them. Nothing worth knowing was unknown to old Alison: she could tell +them where the fairies danced by night, and the names and habits of the +different people who live in the stars, and the reason why thrushes' +eggs have black spots and hedge sparrows' none, and how to make Toffee +of Paradise, and a thousand useful and wonderful things beside.</p> + +<p>Alison was old and wrinkled and bent, but there was not a warmer heart +in all the world, and no tongue could say kinder words than hers, and no +hands minister so lovingly to those who needed help. It was said that +Alison had only to look at a sore place and it was healed again. If any +one loved her more than Tilsa it was Tobene; and if any one loved her +more than Tobene it was Tilsa; and old Alison's love for them was as +strong.</p> + +<p>On the day appointed, the three travellers set forth in a chariot driven +by postilions, and in the course of a week's journeying through strange +countries came at last to Ule.</p> + +<p>At the southern gate they were met by the Liglid. They discovered him to +be more than a mere person—a Personage!—with white hair, and little +beady eyes, and a red nose, and a gold-laced hat.</p> + +<p>'Welcome,' said he, 'welcome, Tilsa and Tobene, to the city or Ule.' And +then he kissed the air an inch or two from the cheek of his +grandchildren and led the way to his house.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="II" id="II"></a>II</h2> + + +<p>Ule was a little city in the midst of a wide plain, and round about it +was a stout wall. One straight, white road crossed the plain from end to +end, entering the city at the northern gate and leaving it by the +southern gate. The borders of the plain were blue mountains whose peaks +reached the sky, and among these peaks the sun made his bed. At least, +so said the good people of Ule.</p> + +<p>Nothing could shake their faith, for did they not every morning see him +rise from the eastern peaks, fresh and ready for the day's work of +warming the air of Ule, and encouraging the trees of Ule to bear fruit +and the buds of Ule to spread into flowers? And every evening did they +not see him, tired and faint, sink to rest amid the western peaks? The +rare strangers who came now and then to the city and heard this story, +were apt to smile unbelievingly and ask laughingly how, after laying his +head among the pillows on the western side of the plain, the sun was +able to wake up on the opposite side, many miles distant?</p> + +<p>But this question presented no difficulty to the good people of Ule. +'Why,' they would reply a little irritably, for they liked to think that +the sun was theirs and theirs only, 'surely the sun can walk in his +sleep as well—nay, better—than ordinary folk? A baby could see that!' +they would add with a laugh.</p> + +<p>So it was settled that the sun spent all his time in the neighbourhood +of Ule. If the citizens had ever travelled away from their native part, +perhaps they would have thought otherwise; but they rarely, or never, +did.</p> + +<p>'What!' they would say, in pained astonishment, 'leave Ule! Why?'</p> + +<p>'To see the world,' the rash stranger who had made the suggestion might +reply.</p> + +<p>'The world? This is the world,' would be the answer.</p> + +<p>And they really believed that it was. The knowledge that thousands of +other places, no whit less happy than themselves, or even more happy, +were in existence would have made the Ulians quite bad-tempered. And +beyond doubt they were in need of no other cause to excite their anger, +for had they not the Flamp?</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="III" id="III"></a>III</h2> + + +<p>The Flamp was a monster who dwelt in a cave somewhere in the mountains +that surrounded the plain. Once every year, on Christmas night, the +Flamp came into the city and threw the population into a frenzy of +terror. That on this night of the year, a night set apart for joyfulness +and festivity, the Loathly Beast (for so he was called by orators in the +City Council when they had used the word Flamp often enough) should +invade their city, seeking his prey, seemed to the Ulians an act of the +grossest cruelty and injustice. Almost as soon as darkness had fallen on +Christmas Day, the noises in the city would cease, and the house-holders +and their families would sit within barred doors, with uplifted fingers, +holding their breath, and listening, listening. Then in the far distance +<i>flob! flob!</i> faint, <i>FLOB!! FLOB!!</i> less faint, <i>FLOB!!! FLOB!!!</i> +less faint, every moment louder, coming nearer and nearer, until the +earth shook, and the Flamp's flobbing, flamping feet filled the air with +deafening thuds.</p> + +<p>All keys were turned, all bolts were drawn, all blinds were down, by the +time he entered the city. Not a light was visible. The Flamp was heard +sniffing at this door, fumbling at the handle of that, knocking at +another, while the <i>shuff! shuff!</i> of his sides against the walls was +quite audible. Now and then he would sit down in the road and sigh +deeply, and the trembling listeners near by could hear the splashing of +his tears on the stones.</p> + +<p>After passing through every street, the Flamp would turn out of the gate +once more, and swing off across the plain to his cave in the mountains, +the earth would cease to tremble, and fainter and fainter would sound +his footfalls: <i>FLOB!!! FLOB!!! FLOB!! FLOB!! flob!</i> flob! until +at last all was still again. Then with white faces and shaking limbs the +citizens would crawl to bed, bemoaning their lot.</p> + +<p>The next day the streets were examined to see if any damage had been +done, but nothing was ever found except pools of water where the Flamp +had sat down to sigh and weep. One strange thing was observed after +every visit of the Flamp: these pools were always opposite houses where +there were children.</p> + +<p>'He comes for the children,' was the natural conclusion of the people. +'See how the Monster cries with rage and disappointment when he finds +all doors barred to him.'</p> + +<p>Measures had of course been taken to keep the Flamp out of Ule. The +gates were barricaded: he broke them down as easily as you break new +toys; spring guns were placed in the roads: they went off, the bullets +struck his hide, and, rebounding, smashed several windows, while one +even ricochetted against the statue of the Liglid in the market-place +and chipped off a piece of his Excellency's nose; poisoned meat was +spread about temptingly: in the morning it was found all gathered +together on the doorstep of the Sanitary Inspector. Thus in time it +became clear that the Flamp was not to be checked, and for many years +before the time of our story no other attempts had been made.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IV" id="IV"></a>IV</h2> + + +<p>The first knowledge of the Flamp which came to Tilsa and Tobene was +gained at breakfast on Christmas morning, when the Liglid warned them of +the precautions necessary in the city at night, and besought them to +make no noise lest the attention of the Loathly Beast should be drawn to +their house.</p> + +<p>'But what is the Flamp?' asked Tilsa.</p> + +<p>'What!' said the Liglid. 'A monster, a dreadful monster!'</p> + +<p>'What is it like?' Tobene asked.</p> + +<p>'Like?' said the Liglid, 'like? Why, no one knows. No one has seen it. +But we can hear it—oh, horrible, horrible!' and the little man covered +his eyes and shuddered.</p> + +<p>'Why does it come?' Tilsa went on.</p> + +<p>'To eat us,' said the Liglid.</p> + +<p>'How many people has it eaten?' said Tobene.</p> + +<p>'Eh!' the Liglid replied. 'Well, I don't—well, I can't exactly—well, I +don't think it has ever eaten any one yet. But it wants to and means +to.'</p> + +<p>'Then how do you know it wants to eat you?' Tilsa persisted.</p> + +<p>'Because,' said the Liglid, 'because it sounds like it.'</p> + +<p>At night the Flamp came, and the city trembled and the earth shook. +Before the Liglid's house it sat down and wept and sighed for fully five +minutes, while within doors the Liglid turned all the colours of the +rainbow with fright. 'His face was fine,' said Tobene afterwards: 'just +like those whirligig things at the end of magic-lantern shows.' From +which remark you may judge that Tobene did not share his grandfather's +alarm, nor did Tilsa, nor old Alison.</p> + +<p>The next morning there was a pool outside the Liglid's house large +enough to sail a boat on.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="V" id="V"></a>V</h2> + + +<p>One day not long after the Flamp's visit, Tilsa ran into old Alison's +room to ask something, and was surprised and grieved to find her nurse +rocking to and fro in her chair, with her face covered. Now and then +between her fingers trickled the tears, and Alison sighed deeply.</p> + +<p>'What is it?' Tilsa asked, kneeling beside her. 'Can I do anything, dear +Alison?'</p> + +<p>'Only stay here, dearie,' sobbed the old woman. 'I was remembering +happier days. Stay here, Tilsa dear. All I want is sympathy.'</p> + +<p>So Tilsa stayed, and Alison soon was herself again. 'Thank you, dearie,' +she said as she wiped her eyes and jumped up ready to set to work again; +'you have done me a world of good. Always be sympathetic if you can. No +one knows how grateful it is.'</p> + +<p>It was nearly bed-time, and Tilsa went downstairs to say good-night to +the Liglid. On the way her little white forehead was puckered into lines +like a railway map.</p> + +<p>She entered her grandfather's room softly. The old man was seated on one +side of his desk; on the other was the Town Clerk of Ule. Between them +was a large sheet of paper with these words at the top:</p> + + +<h3>'A BILL FOR THE CIRCUMVENTION<br /> +OF THE FLAMP.'</h3> + + +<p>They were too busy to notice Tilsa's entrance.</p> + +<p>'We must hurry it through the House,' the Liglid was saying, 'or there +won't be time. Rigmarola is a long way off.'</p> + +<p>'How long will it take to march the troops here?' the Town Clerk asked.</p> + +<p>'Fully six months,' said the Liglid, 'and then they must be drilled. +They don't fight Flamps every day, and they may find it difficult to fix +upon a mode of attack. What a pity it is,' he added, 'that Ule has no +army.'</p> + +<p>'It will be expensive,' said the Town Clerk.</p> + +<p>'Money,' the Liglid remarked, 'is no object where the circumvention of +the Flamp is concerned. The city has suffered long enough.'</p> + +<p>'True,' said the Town Clerk.</p> + +<p>Tilsa now ventured to interrupt. 'Grandpapa,' she said, 'I've come to +say good-night.'</p> + +<p>'Eh!' said the old man, now seeing her for the first time. 'Good-night? +Oh yes! good-night, my dear'; and after his wont he kissed the air an +inch from her cheek.</p> + +<p>Tilsa did not at once run out of the room as she generally did, rather +glad to have done with the ceremony; instead, she spoke again. +'Grandpapa, I think I know what the Flamp wants when he comes to the +town.'</p> + +<p>'Eh!' cried the Liglid, who was intent on his Bill again. 'Eh! I thought +you'd gone to bed. You know what the Flamp comes for?' he continued.</p> + +<p>'Yes,' said Tilsa, 'it's not to eat people at all, or to do any harm; +it's for sympathy.'</p> + +<p>'Rubbish!' said the Liglid. 'Nonsense—don't meddle with things you +don't understand. Run off to bed at once.'</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VI" id="VI"></a>VI</h2> + + +<p>For a long time Tilsa lay awake, putting two and two together and making +four every time. Then she jumped out of bed and pattered with her bare +feet into Tobene's room.</p> + +<p>'Toby,' she said, gently shaking him. 'Toby!'</p> + +<p>Tobene thrust out his arms and looked at her with eyes that saw nothing.</p> + +<p>'Toby,' Tilsa said again. 'It's me—Tilsa.'</p> + +<p>'Yes,' he said in the tone of one who is not much interested. 'What is +it?'</p> + +<p>'I've found out,' said Tilsa, 'what the Flamp comes for every year.'</p> + +<p>'What?' said Tobene.</p> + +<p>'Sympathy,' said Tilsa.</p> + +<p>'What's sympathy?' said Tobene.</p> + +<p>'Oh, it's putting your arms round people and being sorry for them.'</p> + +<p>'Pooh,' said Tobene, 'if that's sympathy, you must be wrong. He's too +big.'</p> + +<p>But Tilsa was not in the least discouraged.</p> + +<p>'No, Toby,' she said, 'I'm right. And, Toby, Toby, darling, I want to go +and find the Flamp and say I'm sorry for him, and I want you to come +with me.'</p> + +<p>'Me?' cried Tobene, now wide awake.</p> + +<p>'Of course,' said Tilsa. 'We've never done anything alone yet, and I +don't want to begin now.'</p> + +<p>'Well, I suppose it's all right,' Tobene faltered. 'But he's drefful +big, isn't he?'</p> + +<p>'I'm afraid he is rather large,' said Tilsa, as cheerfully as she could.</p> + +<p>'And isn't he mighty ferocious?'</p> + +<p>'Well,' said Tilsa, 'they say so, but nobody's sure. And you know, Toby +dear, what silly things the people here say about the sun shining +nowhere else but on the plain. We know better than that, don't we? Well, +very likely they're just as wrong about the Flamp. So you will go, Toby, +won't you?'</p> + +<p>'Yes, I'll go,' said Tobene. 'When shall we start?'</p> + +<p>'Now,' said Tilsa. 'I want you to dress directly without making any +noise. I'm going to write a little note to Alison,—she's too old to +come with us,—and then I'll be ready too.'</p> + +<p>Tilsa hurried back to her room, and wrote the following note to old +Alison:—</p> + +<div class="blockquot"><p><span class="smcap">My very dear Alison</span>—Toby and me are going to try and find the +Flamp and give him simpithy, which I am sure is what he wants, +because he cries and makes a noise just like you did to-day, only +louder, and that is what you said you wanted, dear Alison. Please +don't be frightened, because you said we ought always to give +simpithy when we can, however much it costs us. Please tell +grandpapa if the Flamp is what I think he is there won't be any +need to sircumvent him. With love and kisses, your loving <span class="smcap">Tilsa.</span></p></div> + +<p>Tilsa slipped the note under Alison's door and then fetched Tobene from +his room. They went first to the larder and packed a small basket with +food. Tobene's vote was for blancmange and jam tarts, but Tilsa said +that bread and biscuits were better.</p> + +<p>'How about salt?' Toby asked.</p> + +<p>'Salt?' said Tilsa, 'what for?'</p> + +<p>'To put on the Flamp's tail and catch him,' said Toby. 'Else how are you +going to hug him, Tilsa?'</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VII" id="VII"></a>VII</h2> + + +<p>The two little explorers squeezed through the bars of the northern gate +and for an hour or more hurried as fast as they could along the white +road. They had no plan. All that Tilsa knew was that the Flamp lived +somewhere in the mountains, but whether it was north or south, east or +west, she could not say.</p> + +<p>At the end of the second hour, Tilsa felt certain that it was time to +leave the road, because day was not far off and they were very weary.</p> + +<p>'Cheer up, Toby,' she said. 'We'll soon lie down and have some sleep. +I'm going to shut my eyes and I want you to turn me round three times, +and whichever way I walk then, that way we shall go.'</p> + +<p>This was done, and Tilsa struck off to the left of the road into the +plain. Then after walking for nearly an hour longer, they came to a +little dell with a pool at the bottom and bushes growing on its sides, +and here Tilsa stopped. The two children lay down together under a bush +and at once fell asleep.</p> + +<p>When Tilsa awoke, it was broad day. She roused Tobene, and they went to +the pool and splashed some water over their faces and hands, and then +Tilsa opened the basket. Breakfast consisted only of bread and butter +and biscuits, but as they were hungry it was better than a banquet. The +real business of the day was yet to begin, and Tilsa was wondering how +to set about learning the road, when both children were startled by a +wee voice.</p> + +<p>'I call that piggish,' it said. 'And inconsiderate too.'</p> + +<p>Not seeing any speaker, neither child replied but only stared at each +other in puzzlement.</p> + +<p>'Yes,' the tiny voice continued, 'people can be too tidy. Dropping +crumbs is a bad habit in the house, I know, but out of doors it becomes +a virtue. People who get up first thing in the morning to gorge +themselves with bread and biscuits in this greedy way, and then drop no +crumbs—well, piggish and inconsiderate is what I call them.'</p> + +<p>The accusation aroused Tilsa. 'We didn't gorge,' she said, 'whoever you +are, and we've slept here all night. But here are some crumbs for you, +anyway,' and so saying, she broke up a piece of bread and scattered it +on the ground.</p> + +<p>Immediately a little fiery-crested wren hopped down from a branch of the +bush and began to peck among the grass.</p> + +<p>'Thank you,' he said when he had finished; 'but if you had done it +without being asked it would have been better.'</p> + +<p>'We didn't see you,' said Tobene in excuse.</p> + +<p>'Doesn't matter,' the wren replied; 'birds is everywhere, and always +hungry. Wherever you drop crumbs you may be sure they'll be acceptable. +Remember that. Now, is there anything I can do for you?'</p> + +<p>'Well,' said Tilsa, 'we want to know the way to the Flamp.'</p> + +<p>'Before I tell you,' said the wren, 'you must inform me whether I am +speaking to a boy or a girl.'</p> + +<p>'I am a girl,' said Tilsa. 'Toby here is a boy.'</p> + +<p>'Very well,' the wren answered. 'Then I must talk to Toby. I make it a +rule never to join in friendly conversation with women. They wear my +feathers in their hats.'</p> + +<p>'But men shoot you,' Tobene interposed, angry that Tilsa should be +treated in this way.</p> + +<p>'True,' said the wren, 'true. But so long as there are men, birds must +expect to be shot. It's all in the day's work and must be endured. But +for one's body to go to the milliner's is intolerable. Intolerable.' The +little creature suddenly swallowed its rage, and continued more sweetly: +'Now, as to the Flamp. What you want, Toby, is a Flamp compass.'</p> + +<p>'What's that?' Tobene asked.</p> + +<p>'Why, an ordinary compass points to the north, doesn't it? Well, a Flamp +compass points to the Flamp,' said the wren. 'Then you can find the +way.'</p> + +<p>'But where are we to get one?' was Tobene's very natural question.</p> + +<p>'The hedgehog makes them,' said the wren. 'On the other side of this +dell you will see a line of bushes. The hedgehog lives under the +fourteenth. Knock on the ground three times and he'll come out. Now I +must be off. Good-morning.' And with these words the fiery-crested wren +flitted away.</p> + +<p>At the fourteenth bush the children knocked three times on the ground.</p> + +<p>'Well?' said a surly voice.</p> + +<p>'Please we want a Flamp compass,' said Tilsa.</p> + +<p>At once the hedgehog appeared. 'I beg your pardon,' he said in softer +tones, 'but I mistook you for the rates and taxes, or I shouldn't have +spoke so short. I wasn't expecting customers so early. A Flamp compass? +Why, I don't think I have one in stock. You see, since the Flamps died +off, the demand has been so small that very few are made. There's my +own, which has been in the family for years, but I shouldn't care to +part with that except at a high price.'</p> + +<p>'How much would you call a high price, sir?' Tilsa inquired a little +anxiously.</p> + +<p>'Well, I couldn't let it go for anything less than a Ribston pippin, or +its value,' said the hedgehog. 'But I'm open to offers,' he continued.</p> + +<p>'Toby,' said Tilsa, 'turn out your pockets.'</p> + +<p>Tobene did so, and Tilsa examined the produce with a doubtful face.</p> + +<p>'Please, sir,' she said, 'would you like for the Flamp compass, which +you say is an old one, a piece of string, two marbles, some +toffee—although I'm afraid it's rather mixed up with string—eight +nuts, a screw, a peg-top, and a knife?'</p> + +<p>'The knife will be useful,' said Toby, who was looking on a little +ruefully, but convinced that Tilsa, as usual, was doing the right thing +and therefore must be supported, 'in case any one tries to snub you.'</p> + +<p>'Ah, you needn't trouble about that,' said the hedgehog. 'It's a +difficult matter to snub me. You see,' he added, 'by the nature of his +construction a hedgehog is not easily sat upon. But to business. +Considering that the times are hard, I don't mind accepting your offer, +miss.'</p> + +<p>So saying, to Tilsa's immense delight, the hedgehog retired under the +bush again, and came out carrying the Flamp compass. 'Is there anything +else I can do for you?' he asked. 'Any periwinkle brooms or mallow +cheeses this morning? We have a nice stock of thistle-clocks just in.'</p> + +<p>'No, thank you,' Tilsa replied as they hurried off. 'Nothing more +to-day. Good-morning.'</p> + +<p>The compass was neatly contrived of the cup of an acorn, through the +bottom of which ran a hedgehog's prickle. Balanced on the point was the +needle, a spear of dried grass, and over all was a spider's web to serve +as glass.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VIII" id="VIII"></a>VIII</h2> + + +<p>No matter how the Flamp compass was twisted, the needle pointed steadily +to the mountains before them, and the children marched bravely forward. +They were hungry and tired, but Tilsa would as soon have thought of +asking Tobene to carry her as of turning back. As for Tobene, he put one +foot before the other as firmly as he was able, and tried to forget the +loss of his treasures.</p> + +<p>The worst part of the journey was clambering over the hot rocks when the +mountains were reached, and the travellers did at last lose their +resolute cheerfulness, and had just sat down in the shade to have a good +cry, when they suddenly heard the sound of singing. Not exactly singing; +rather a melancholy droning, or chanting, as of a dirge. Listening +intently, they could make out these words:</p> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0"><i>I'm not in the least in love with life;</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>I might be, p'raps, if I had a wife</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>To care for me in a wifely way,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>Or a neighbour or two to say good-day,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4"><i>Or a chum</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4"><i>To come</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>And give me the news in a friendly talk</i>,<br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>Or share a duet or a meal or a walk.</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>But all alone in the world am I,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4"><i>And I sit in a cave,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4"><i>And try to behave</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>As a good Flamp should, with philosophy.</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>I shan't last long, for the cave is damp,</i><br /></span> +<span class="i0"><i>And nothing's so bad for a Flamp</i><br /></span> +<span class="i4"><i>As cramp....</i><br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p>'It's the Flamp!' said both children together, fearfully.</p> + +<p>The chanting began again, and Tilsa and Tobene jumped up and, following +the sound of the voice, came to a wide and heavily-trodden path between +two rocks. They plodded along it until, rounding a crag, they perceived +immediately before them a yawning cave. Although the singer was out of +sight, the noise made by him was now almost overwhelming and so dismal +that the children were on the point of joining in the lamentation +themselves.</p> + +<p>A few steps more brought them in sight of the melancholy songster. +Seated in a corner of the cave, with his massive head on his fore-paws, +the picture of dejection, was the most enormous creature they had ever +seen or dreamed about. He was rather like an elephant, but much more +immense and without a trunk: a huge, ungainly, slate-coloured animal.</p> + +<p>He did not hear them, but sat rocking to and fro in his corner, moaning +lugubriously.</p> + +<p>'Toby,' said Tilsa, who now was not in the least alarmed, 'can you +cough?'</p> + +<p>'I'll try,' said Toby, and he coughed.</p> + +<p>The Flamp took down one paw from its desert of face and peered out. Then +he sprang to his feet and rubbed his heavy, watery, blue eyes in blank +astonishment. Tilsa and Tobene did not move. They stood still, gazing +into the Flamp's great, mournful face, now wrinkled up with surprise and +excitement.</p> + +<p>Then the Flamp spoke—'What?' he said, 'kids? Real kids? Flesh-and-blood +kids? Human, rollicking, kind-hearted kids?'</p> + +<p>'We are real children,' Tilsa replied at length, 'if that is what you +mean, and, oh, we are so glad to have found you! The hedgehog's compass +told us to come this way, or we should never have reached you at all.'</p> + +<p>'Then you set out intending to find me?' said the Flamp. 'Well, that is +a good one. How is it you're not scared, like all the rest of them?'</p> + +<p>'I don't know,' said Tilsa. 'I can't think. But we weren't, were we, +Toby?'</p> + +<p>'No,' said Tobene.</p> + +<p>'And what made you come?' the Flamp asked.</p> + +<p>'We—we—' Tilsa faltered. 'Well, sir, we thought you wanted sympathy, +like Alison did. And so we came to—to try and give you some.'</p> + +<p>'And so I do,' the Flamp gasped out. 'And so I do,' and he lifted up his +right paw, and brushed it across his eyes. 'You see, it's precious +little of it I get. It's very hard, I can assure you, my dears, to be +the last of one's race. Why, the land was full of Flamps once, and a +fellow need never be in want of company, but now—now they're all dead, +all but me, and I'm not long for this life.' The Flamp sighed and +dropped a tear, which splashed heavily.</p> + +<p>Tilsa felt very sorry. 'Poor—' she began to say, but stopped abruptly. +She was intending to say 'Poor Flamp,' but that now seemed to her too +familiar; so she altered it to 'Poor gentleman!' although when the word +was out, it seemed equally unsuitable.</p> + +<p>Tobene said nothing aloud, but nudged Tilsa and whispered, 'Aren't you +going to try throwing your arms round him, Tilsa? It's time, isn't it?'</p> + +<p>'Hush!' said Tilsa severely.</p> + +<p>The Flamp went on: 'And I doubt if any one is keener on company than I +am. Over in the city yonder, you know, they have a season called +Christmas, when every one is supposed to be friends with every one else; +and I thought to myself, That's the time for me. I won't ask for much, I +thought, but if just one night in the year they'll look pleased to see +me, and say, 'How do?' why I'll be very grateful to them and a deal +happier during the months that follow. It wasn't much to ask, was it? +But I suppose I didn't go to work the right way, or perhaps I had two +legs too many. Anyway, they misunderstood me: thought I'd come to do +them harm or something, and tried shooting me and poisoning me and +barricading themselves in. Wouldn't even give me a moment's sight of a +kid's face. I didn't try any other night. It seemed to me that if at a +season of goodwill they would behave like that, my chances at an +ordinary time would be less than nothing. But men can't understand +animals. Children can, though they're apt to grow out of it. Thank +goodness, there's <i>some</i> children that stay childlike to the end, +however old they may be.' He brushed his paw across his eyes again.</p> + +<p>Soon he went on: 'So I've had to live alone, with no company but my own +voice. Maybe you heard me singing as you came. It wasn't much of a song, +I admit, for elegance of rhyme and metre don't seem to come easy, but a +song like that is more comfort than you'd believe.' He paused again.</p> + +<p>Then he turned radiantly to his visitors. 'And you've trudged all the +way from the city just to be kind to me, have you? Well, that is good of +you! Bless your hearts, no one knows how much a deed like that means. +Why, it's as good as smush even to know that any one is thinking of you +kindly, let alone doing things. I haven't felt so cheery and comfortable +for years. But you must be hungry. Now tell me what you would like to +eat and I'll try and get it for you, and afterwards you must tell me all +about yourselves.'</p> + +<p>Tilsa looked at Tobene, and Tobene at Tilsa.</p> + +<p>Then Tobene spoke to the Flamp for the first time. 'You said just now +that something was as good as smush. Please, what is smush? because if +it's something to eat, I should like that.'</p> + +<p>The Flamp laughed all over: 'Splendid,' he cried, 'splendid! Something +to eat? I should rather think it is. You couldn't have made a better +choice. You shall have smush. Sit down here while I get it ready.'</p> + +<p>Tilsa and Tobene sat down, and the Flamp retreated farther into the +cave. There was a noise of pots and pans.</p> + +<p>'Isn't he a whopper?' said Tobene.</p> + +<p>'Tremendous,' said Tilsa. 'And what a dear old thing!'</p> + +<p>'Yes,' Tobene continued, 'and what a set of donkeys those people at Ule +have been all these years. Why, he's as jolly as Alison, in a different +way. Do you think he'll give us a ride, Tilsa?'</p> + +<p>'Of course he will,' said a deep voice above them. 'But you must eat +some smush first,' and looking up, they saw the Flamp on his hind legs, +towering into the roof of the cave, and in his paws a large dish and +some plates and spoons. 'Now then,' he said, 'eat as much as you can.'</p> + +<p>(All that the historian can do towards a description of smush is to say +that its colour is pink, and its taste quite indescribable but blessed +in the highest degree. When asked about it afterwards, Tilsa and Tobene, +even to their old age, would become purple and inarticulate with +enthusiasm. Perhaps if each of you thinks of all the most delicious +things you have ever eaten, you will come a little nearer to an idea of +what smush is like.)</p> + +<p>After they had finished, Tilsa told the Flamp all about herself, and +Tobene, and old Alison, and her grandfather the Liglid of Ule.</p> + +<p>'I expect,' she said, 'they are looking for us now. And I think, sir, if +you don't mind, it would be better if you were to go back with us, and +then we could let everybody see how kind and gentle you are, and +grandpapa won't go on trying to circumvent you.'</p> + +<p>'Circumvent?' said the Flamp. 'What's that?'</p> + +<p>'I don't know what it means,' said Tilsa, 'except that it's something +horrid. And someone named Bill's going to do it.'</p> + +<p>'All right,' said the Flamp, 'we will go back together, and the sooner +the better, I think, or that dear old Alison of yours will be nervous. +Although I should like to keep you here, you know. But you'll promise to +come again, won't you, and stay a long time?'</p> + +<p>'O yes,' cried Tilsa and Tobene together, 'we should just think we +will!'</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IX" id="IX"></a>IX</h2> + + +<p>That night the two children slept soundly in a corner of the cave, while +the Flamp sat by and watched them. In the morning, after a breakfast of +smush, they climbed on the monster's back and started for the city at a +good swinging pace.</p> + +<p>'It was like riding on a cloud,' said Tobene afterwards: 'so high up.'</p> + +<p>They were well within sight of Ule when—'Look,' said Tobene suddenly, +pointing in the direction of a speck on the white road, 'what's that?'</p> + +<p>'It moves,' said Tilsa. 'It's a person.'</p> + +<p>'We'll soon see what it is,' the Flamp grunted, lengthening his stride. +The earth shook as his feet beat upon it.</p> + +<p>As they came nearer and nearer, the children saw that the object was a +woman. For a moment she stood upright, looking all ways at once as +though panic-stricken, and then she suddenly unfurled a green umbrella +and sank behind it.</p> + +<p>'Why, it's Alison,' cried Tobene. 'Hurrah!'</p> + +<p>'Stop, stop!' cried Tilsa to the Flamp. 'Please don't frighten dear old +Alison. Let us go down and run to her.'</p> + +<p>The Flamp at once stopped and lay on his side, and the children slipped +to the ground and scampered as fast as they could towards their nurse. +The umbrella did not move. As they drew close they heard the old lady's +voice in beseeching tones: 'Please, Mr. Flamp, they're the sweetest +children in the world, and if you've swallowed them, you mountaineous +wretch you, you may as well swallow me too, for all there's left for me +to live for! Besides, I'm their nurse, and I might be useful to them +down inside. Ooh! Ooh! Please, Mr. Flamp, they're the sweetest children +in the world, and if you've swallowed them, you mountaineous wretch you, +you——'</p> + +<p>'Alison, dear, it's all right,' Tilsa interrupted, skipping up and +pushing the umbrella aside. 'We're as safe and happy as ever we were.'</p> + +<p>Alison stared first at one and then at the other of her truant charges. +Then—'Well?' she almost screamed, 'is it really you, my dearies?'</p> + +<p>'Really!' exclaimed both children at once, and there was such hugging as +the plain of Ule had never before seen.</p> + +<p>Soon Alison furled her umbrella and pointed to the Flamp, who was +smiling and chuckling and soliloquising in the distance.</p> + +<p>('It's as good as smush to see this,' he was saying.)</p> + +<p>'Is that him?' Alison inquired.</p> + +<p>'Yes,' said Tilsa, 'and he's such a dear, you can't think.'</p> + +<p>'Yes, come along and be introduced,' said Tobene, and without a word +Alison went, being quite assured that if the creature had not harmed her +two pets it would not harm her.</p> + +<p>'Mr. Flamp,' said Tobene, 'I want to introduce you to this lady, our +nurse Alison. She's the best nurse in the world. You ought to get her to +tuck you up at night.'</p> + +<p>'Tuck <i>me</i> up?' cried the Flamp, and—'Tuck <i>that</i> up?' cried Alison, +both together, and they all laughed, and at once Alison was at home and +comfortable.</p> + +<p>They went forward to the city, chatting gaily, but when the wall was +reached, the gates were found to be barricaded. No sound of life was +audible, no moving thing to be seen.</p> + +<p>'As I expected,' said the Flamp sadly. 'They heard me coming, and as +usual have locked themselves in. What's to be done?'</p> + +<p>'The best course,' remarked old Alison, who was always a wonderful +manager, whether with the cold mutton or a child in a temper, 'the best +course is to wait. You lie down here, Mr. Flamp, and make as little +noise breathing as you can; and you, Tilsa, darling, take this pencil +and paper and write a note to your grandfather, to be slipped under the +gate. They'll venture out soon and find it.'</p> + +<p>The Flamp and Tilsa did as they were bid. This was Tilsa's note to the +Liglid:—</p> + +<div class="blockquot"><p>'<span class="smcap">My dear Grandpapa</span>—There is no need to be frightened. Alison and +Toby and me are just outside the gates all safe with the Flamp, who +is really and truly the sweetest creature you ever saw. He doesn't +want to hurt this city at all, he only wants simpithy like I said +he did. If you open the gate and tell the people this you can see +for yourself how kind and gentle he is, and that there isn't any +need of sircumventing him. So please open the gate quickly. Your +affectionate grandchild,</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">Tilsa.</span></p></div> + +<p>The paper was folded and addressed to 'His Excellency the Liglid of +Ule,' and Tobene slipped it under the gate. Then the little party sat +down to wait. Old Alison took out her knitting, and as she worked, told +the others of her adventures in search of them. 'I had to come alone,' +she said: 'every one else was frightened.'</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="X" id="X"></a>X</h2> + + +<p>One hour passed, two hours, three hours, and then a flag of truce +appeared above the ramparts.</p> + +<p>'Here, Mr. Flamp,' said Alison, 'get up and wave this in reply'; and she +gave her handkerchief to the Flamp.</p> + +<p>He mounted slowly on his hind feet, and, stepping to the wall, waved the +handkerchief over it. A few minutes went by, and then the Liglid's +scared face appeared at a loophole. Seeing Tilsa, Tobene, and Alison +sitting comfortably in the shade cast by the Flamp's huge body, he +seemed to be reassured.</p> + +<p>'Alison,' he called out, 'are those really the children?'</p> + +<p>'No doubt of it, sir,' said Alison.</p> + +<p>'Then wait a little longer,' said the Liglid as he vanished.</p> + +<p>He went at once to the Council Chamber and summoned a meeting of the +wise men of Ule. 'Apparently,' he said, 'we have misjudged this creature +for many years; but our duty now is simple: to draw up as quickly as may +be an address of welcome to our eccentric visitor.'</p> + +<p>An hour later, a procession of the men of eminence of the city, followed +by the inhabitants, marched along the streets to the northern gate. At +the Liglid's word of command, the barricades were removed and the gate +flung open.</p> + +<p>Tilsa and Tobene at once ran to their grandfather and kissed him, while +Alison dropped a curtsey. The Flamp stood up and bowed as gracefully as +he could, and the Liglid returned the salute, not without some shaking +in the knees.</p> + +<p>In faltering tones, which afterwards grew more steady, he begged of the +Flamp the 'honour of his attention for a few moments,' and forthwith +read the address of welcome. It was flowery and extravagant in style, +and contained not a few statements which sent a spasm across the Flamp's +wide expanse of face, such as might be caused by an attempt to suppress +laughter.</p> + +<p>At the end, the Flamp bowed again and laid a massive paw upon his heart. +Then he replied. He began by thanking the Liglid for his kind welcome, +continued with the expression of his determination to do in the future +all that he could for the good of the city, and ended with a eulogy of +Tilsa and Tobene.</p> + +<p>'They are, if I may use the word,' he said feelingly, 'kids which any +city should be proud of. And to be the grandfather of such bricks ought +to be as good as smush and a perpetual delight. And their nurse, ma'am +Alison here, is an old lady as is worthy of them.'</p> + +<p>The crowd cheered these remarks again and again, and Tilsa and Tobene, +who were not accustomed to such publicity, hardly knew where to look. As +for old Alison, she curtseyed and went on with her knitting. 'Children,' +she said to herself, 'that travel in search of Flamps wear out their +stockings. Flattery or no flattery, new stockings must be made.'</p> + +<p>Other speeches followed, for Ule was famous for its oratory, the best +being from a young statesman who made the admirable suggestion that in +commemoration of this auspicious day, a new order of merit should be +established, called the Order of the Friends of the Flamp, membership to +be conferred upon all persons conspicuous for spontaneous acts of +kindness. Further, he proposed that the first persons to add the letters +F.F., signifying Friend of the Flamp, to their names, should be Tilsa, +Tobene, and old Alison. The project was received with the wildest +enthusiasm, and the order was then and there founded. And to the end of +the history of Ule, no honour was esteemed more highly by the citizens +than the simple affix F.F.</p> + +<p>The formal part of the proceedings being finished, the Liglid proclaimed +the day a general holiday and in the name of the city invited the Flamp +to a grand banquet. Afterwards came sports of all kinds on the plain, in +which the Flamp took part, carrying enormous loads of children up and +down at a hand gallop, until the Commissioner of Works begged him to +move more slowly, owing to the danger caused to the public buildings of +Ule by the tremor of the earth. Never in the memory of the oldest +inhabitant had such a day of jollification and excitement been spent.</p> + +<p>Of course the Flamp was the chief attraction, but Tilsa and Tobene and +old Alison were very considerable lions too, and a hundred times they +told the story of their adventures. Presuming on his relationship to the +explorers, the Liglid, it must be confessed, endeavoured to take to +himself some credit for the proceedings, but it is doubtful if he was +believed.</p> + +<p>One worthy deed, however, he did perform: he publicly burned the Bill +for the Circumvention of the Flamp, amid deafening applause.</p> + +<p>At last, late in the evening, the Flamp said good-bye, promising to come +again soon, and swung off across the plain, the people waving farewell +to him from the city wall. And as he moved along, he chanted to himself +a new song, which, although not much better in rhyme and metre, was +vastly more cheerful than his old dirge. This was the first line of it:</p> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">'<i>O life, I think, is a jolly good thing.</i>'<br /></span> +</div></div> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="XI" id="XI"></a>XI</h2> + + +<p>There is no space to tell a thousandth part of the benefits conferred by +the Flamp upon the city which once had used him so ill. Suffice it to +say, that henceforward the Flamp became the guardian of Ule.</p> + +<p>A line of communication was set up between his cave and the city, and +when wanted he was signalled for; then at a rush he would cross the +plain, ready for any duty.</p> + +<p>He helped the people of Ule in countless ways, from overwhelming the +attacking force of the King of Unna, without the loss of a single man in +the defending army, to lying on the plain in the heat of summer and +casting a shadow in which picnic parties might have lunch.</p> + +<p>Sometimes the Flamp came when the signal had not been set in motion; and +then it was known that he was again in need of sympathy, and the +children of the city, headed by Tilsa and Tobene, would run out into the +plain to meet him and join in a game, or if it was at night, and he came +within the walls, the house-holders would join in the song of welcome +which the Poet Laureate of Ule had written for such occasions. And soon +the Flamp would return to the mountains happy again.</p> + +<p>The Christmas following the Understanding of the Flamp (as the +establishment of these new relations was called) was a time of good +fellowship, such as no Ulian had dreamed to be possible. Christmas at +last really was Christmas. The Flamp as of old came down at evening, but +this year no doors were barred, no blinds were drawn; instead he passed +from house to house throughout the city, looking in at the upper windows +and receiving a welcome at each, and sometimes a piece of plum-cake, +sometimes a packet of sweets, all of which passed down his huge red +throat. Is it necessary to say that his longest stay was at the nursery +window of the Liglid's house?</p> + +<p>In fact Tilsa and Tobene, as you may imagine, were always the Flamp's +favourites, and every summer it was they, and they alone, who were +honoured by an invitation to stay for a fortnight in the Blue Mountains, +where they had such a holiday as falls to the lot of few children.</p> + +<p>So did Ule, under the Flampian influence, become one of the happiest +spots in the world, and strangers poured into the city every day to +learn the secret of contentment.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="The_Ameliorator" id="The_Ameliorator"></a>The Ameliorator</h2> + +<h4><i>TO "EVERSLEY" AND ALL WITHIN IT</i></h4> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IA" id="IA"></a>I</h2> + +<h3>THE CITY OF BIRDS</h3> + + +<p>Once upon a time there was a city where the good people were under the +protection of singing-birds of all kinds: nightingales, thrushes, +blackbirds, robins, chaffinches, linnets. As you passed through the +streets the song of one at least of these little fellows was certain to +strike pleasantly on the ear; for they would perch on the window-sills, +or in the branches of the trees before the houses, and fling out their +glad notes.</p> + +<p>No money could buy the birds. It mattered not how rich a man was, if he +were not merry at heart no bird's voice could be his to gladden the +hours with song.</p> + +<p>Fugitives fleeing across the wide plain at night would, once within the +gates of the city, pause a moment with raised finger, listening +breathlessly. Then the still air would be filled with beautiful, +consoling music, and 'Hark,' they would say, 'the nightingale! A good +man lives close by. Let us knock and ask protection.' And travellers +hearing a blackbird whistling gaily before a hostelry would know that +within doors was brave cheer and jocund company.</p> + +<p>Most of the children in the city had each a bird friend, and it was a +sad day when the wings spread and the songster flew away, for that meant +that in the heart of the child all was not well. Always, however, when +the smiles came back, back came also the little feathered companion.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IIA" id="IIA"></a>II</h2> + +<h3>THE FOUR CHILDREN</h3> + + +<p>Now this story is about four children in the city who were friends of +the birds: Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline. They were for the most +part good children, but now and again they made up their little minds +that they knew better than anybody else what was the best thing for +them; and as it generally happened that their elders refused to take the +same view, there came occasionally into their lives intervals of +unhappiness when the whole world was most plainly doing its best to +spoil their fun and treat them altogether badly. At least so it seemed +in the eyes of Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline.</p> + +<p>And to those who had the care of Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline, it +was apparent one Monday evening that such an interval was about to +begin. Bertram's governess had the greatest difficulty in persuading +that all-knowing boy that lessons were in the least desirable; Beryl's +mother having refused to buy her a new doll, and thus bring her store of +dolls from fifteen to sixteen, could induce Beryl to fall in with no +plans whatever; and the barometers of Bobus and Aline were unmistakably +at 'Set Sulks,' because they too wanted something which was not good for +them. Thus, one Monday evening, was it with Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and +Aline.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IIIA" id="IIIA"></a>III</h2> + +<h3>THE NEW HOUSE</h3> + + +<p>On the Tuesday morning that followed, the inhabitants of the City of +Birds, when they came downstairs and began the business of the day, were +astonished to find a new shop in the Market Square; astonished, because +no one could remember either what the house was like before, or who had +then lived in it, or indeed that there had been a house there at +all—not even the house-agent, who felt more than a little annoyed in +consequence, deeming himself defrauded of his just fees.</p> + +<p>There, however, stood the house, leaving no room for doubt as to its +existence. There it stood, spick and span, with white window-curtains +tied up with red ribbons, and rows of flower-pots on the sills, and a +shining brass handle and knocker on the door, and a dark blind in the +shop window through which, howsoever noses might be flattened against +the glass, nothing could be seen. Hanging out over the pavement was a +quaint sign-board bearing the words</p> + +<div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> +<span class="i0">'THE AMELIORATOR.'<br /></span> +</div></div> + +<p>And, to crown all, in the branches of the silver birch before the house +a thrush was singing, while the swallows were already busy under the +gable.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IVA" id="IVA"></a>IV</h2> + +<h3>THE BUSINESS CARD</h3> + + +<p>At seven o'clock on the same morning, Bertram awoke. Had any observers +been present they would have seen him turn over in bed, push his fists +into the air and fight the sunshine which was streaming through the +window, and then open his eyes and begin to remember where he was. Then +they might have seen him yawn to a greater extent than so small a boy +would seem to be capable of. It was when Bertram's waking operations had +reached this stage that he remembered what had happened last night: he +had been naughty and had gone to bed early in consequence. But he wasn't +in the least sorry for it, not he, and his governess was a beast. These +were his sentiments as he began to dress. 'I shan't wash this morning,' +he said to himself, 'just to spite them.'</p> + +<p>It was just as he was turning to leave the room that Bertram caught +sight of something white on the floor underneath the window. Picking it +up, he saw that it was a card—a business card—which certainly was not +there last night. 'It must have blown in,' he thought, and forthwith +began to read it. This is what he read:—</p> + + +<h4>THE AMELIORATOR</h4> + +<h4>begs to inform the Children of the City<br /> +of Birds that he has set up in Business<br /> +in their midst, and is ready (although not<br /> +eager) for their custom.</h4> + +<h4>SAD FACES BRIGHTENED WITH THE UTMOST DESPATCH.<br /> +TEARS DRIED. DISAPPOINTMENTS RELIEVED.<br /> +SORROWS TURNED TO PLEASURES.<br /> +BAD GOVERNESSES PUNISHED.<br /> +HARD LESSONS MADE EASY.<br /> +UNREASONABLE PARENTS BROUGHT TO THEIR SENSES.<br /> +TEMPER REPAIRING IN ALL ITS BRANCHES.</h4> + +<h4><i>Business Hours</i>—When you wish.</h4> + +<h4><span class="smcap">Terms Easy.</span></h4> + +<h4><span class="smcap">The Ameliorator,</span><br /> +Market Square,<br /> +City of Birds.</h4> + + +<p>The words seemed to Bertram too good to be true, and he read them again +slowly. '"Sad faces brightened with the utmost despatch." "Tears dried." +That's for girls of course,' he remarked (but why he was so emphatic it +is difficult to say, since it was only last night that——but that's of +no importance). '"Bad governesses punished." Hooroo! "Hard lessons made +easy." Now this,' said Bertram, 'is the right kind of fellow, this +A-M-E-L-I-O-R-A-T-O-R, this Ameliorator!' and so saying, he pushed the +card into his pocket and looked out of the window to whistle +good-morning to his robin. But the bird was not there. His face fell +again. 'Pooh,' he said, 'they're all against me now, but I don't care,' +and as he walked downstairs to breakfast, he made up his mind to be +thoroughly fractious.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VA" id="VA"></a>V</h2> + +<h3>THE CROSS-GRAINED MORNING</h3> + + +<p>In the City of Birds there were several large green gardens set aside +for children. These gardens were the finest places in the world in which +to play hide-and-seek, because of the summer-houses and grottoes and +winding paths; also there were ponds to sail boats on, and trees to +climb, and caves for robbers, and a little circle of wet grass in the +midst of rhododendron bushes for fairies to plot and plan in; and for +very hot afternoons a soft bank where you could lie in the shade of a +cedar which seemed to bless the earth with its broad hands.</p> + +<p>Every morning after lessons the four children used to meet in one of +these gardens and play till dinner-time. Sometimes they would play +cricket until they were too tired to run another yard, and then lean +over the rim of the fountain and watch the goldfish gliding silently +through the water, or they would sail their boats on the pond, or join +in the marriage ceremonies of two of the blue ants that lived in the +bark of the cedar. There was always plenty of excitement at a blue ant's +wedding, on account of the bad behaviour of the company. The bridegroom +had a way of ignoring the solemnity of the occasion and trying to walk +to church with one of the bridesmaids, or even the bride's mother, while +sometimes the bride would forget all about her duties, and leave the +procession in order to pick up and stagger away with a ridiculous piece +of wood which she could not possibly really need. Very often the bride +had to be changed as often as six times before the church was reached, +where Bertram, who always insisted on being the clergy-man, was waiting +to perform the service. Ants, it must be confessed, are not good at +games: they are too busy, or, as Bertram put it, too selfish. Neither +are wood-lice. Just at important moments wood-lice turn sulky and roll +themselves into little balls. Worms are most trust-worthy, although +never eager for sensible play; but worms are slimy, and Beryl always +refused to touch them. Spiders, too, have a way of getting down one's +neck. Perhaps frogs are best of all. Frogs are quite satisfactory; they +always jump when you touch them up. Toads, on the other hand, are sulky; +but their eyes are good to look into.</p> + +<p>On this particular morning, Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline met as +usual, but for some reason or other they found it impossible to have a +really good game; whatever they tried appeared flat and tiresome. They +began with cricket and were fairly successful until Bobus hit the ball +into the pond, where it immediately sank. Hitherto it always had +floated. Cricket, therefore, was over. Hide-and-seek took its place and +was going pretty well until Aline fell and hurt her knee. So no more +hide-and-seek. They tried the blue ants, and then the lizards that lived +under the leaves in the violet bed; but met with nothing but +unsociableness. The ants were quite nasty at being interfered with, and +one of them crawled up Beryl's arm.</p> + +<p>At last the children made up their minds to try no longer, and instead +they lay on their backs on the grass and grumbled. It was clear that the +world was against them, and what is the good of fighting in the face of +such opposition? Bertram began the grumbling. 'Old Tabby,' he +said,—that being the way in which he spoke of Miss Tabitha, his +governess,—'is a beast. She makes me learn heaps of things which nobody +can ever need to know.'</p> + +<p>'And I mayn't have a new doll,' said Beryl.</p> + +<p>'And I mayn't stay up later than eight,' said Bobus.</p> + +<p>'And I mayn't eat cake until I've had three pieces of horrid bread and +butter,' said Aline.</p> + +<p>'It's a shame,' said all.</p> + +<p>'Yes,' Bertram went on, 'and my robin wasn't singing this morning.'</p> + +<p>'No more was my linnet,' said Beryl.</p> + +<p>'No more was my chaffinch,' said Bobus.</p> + +<p>'And no more was my blackbird,' said Aline.</p> + +<p>'It's a shame,' said Bertram again; 'everything's against us. Except,' +he added, pulling the card from his pocket, 'except the +Amel—Amelior—except the Ameliorator.'</p> + +<p>'Why, have you got one too?' Aline asked, producing a card exactly like +it, and as she did so Beryl and Bobus also each showed one. On comparing +notes it seemed that all the cards had come in the night in the same +mysterious way.</p> + +<p>The four children looked at each other in silence. They all wanted to +say the same thing, but no one wished to be first. Bertram, as usual, +took the lead: 'Let's go and see the Am—what-d'ye-call-him,' he said.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VIA" id="VIA"></a>VI</h2> + +<h3>THE LITTLE OLD MAN</h3> + + +<p>A few minutes later the children stood hand in hand before the new shop +in the Market Square, and as they did so they suddenly discovered that +their wounded hearts were well again, just as you find that the tooth +stops aching at the moment you reach the dentist's doorstep. They might +even then have run home again, had not Bertram, feeling a little +doubtful of the cure and more than a little inquisitive, peeped into the +shop.</p> + +<p>'Come in, Bertram,' said a blithe voice, 'I've been expecting you all +the morning'; and before he and his companions knew where they were the +door was shut, the four children were inside it, each in a comfortable +chair, and in front of them was absolutely the pleasantest little old +man they had ever seen.</p> + +<p>He had a smooth, ruddy face, and white hair, and large round spectacles +behind which his eyes danced and sparkled, and a comical kindly mouth, +and his clothes were of bright colours that merged into each other as +easily as those of the rainbow and were as certain a sign that the sun +was shining somewhere. Moreover there was in his appearance a vague but +unmistakable likeness to the one person of all persons whom Bertram +loved best, and to the one whom Beryl loved best, and to the one whom +little Aline loved best, and to the one whom Bobus loved best. Yes, it +was very strange, but although all these people were totally different +there was something about the little old man that bore resemblance to +each of them.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VIIA" id="VIIA"></a>VII</h2> + +<h3>THE STOCK IN TRADE</h3> + + +<p>When the children summoned up enough courage to look round, they saw +that the shop was stocked with drawers and bottles and had quite a +business-like appearance. One bottle was labelled 'Mixture for Sulks,' +and another, 'Bad Temper Lotion.' Then there were 'Cross-patch Powders' +and 'Pills against Meddling.' In a prominent place Beryl saw two tall +flasks, one almost full of water and the other almost empty, and the +water in the one that was nearly full was thick and muddy, but that in +the second was clear as crystal. The flask that was nearly full was +lettered 'Tears Shed for Ourselves,' and the other, 'Tears Shed for +Others.' But also there were pleasanter things than these: there were +cupboards full of sweets, shelves of picture books and fairy stories, +and a great store of toys. Also there were many drawers, labelled +encouragingly, 'Rewards for Good Humour,' 'Prizes for Hard Work,' +'Prizes for Hard Play,' 'Presents for Anticipating Wishes,' 'Gifts for +Forgetting Number One,' and so on.</p> + +<p>It took only a short time to see these things, and meanwhile the little +old man was standing in front of the fire, beaming merrily. Then, when +all four had taken a good look, and were feeling rather bad in +consequence, for they could not feel entitled to much beyond pills and +powders, he led them into the inner room—his consulting-room he called +it—saying, 'Come along, little sorrowful ones, and we will inquire into +the great trouble.' And at once they had some difficulty in remembering +their grievance at all, although an hour ago it had seemed to fill the +whole landscape.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="VIIIA" id="VIIIA"></a>VIII</h2> + +<h3>THE ADVICE</h3> + + +<p>'Now,' said the Ameliorator, when they were all comfortably inside the +inner room, 'I want to tell you about some of my friends. "Ladies first" +is a good rule: let me tell you about a little girl I once knew,'—here +he laid his hand on Beryl's head—'who had just such soft hair as this, +and just such a gloomy little face.' Here Beryl smiled, in spite of +herself. 'Yes,' added the Ameliorator, 'and just such a smile now and +then. And what do you think the trouble was? Why, although she had no +fewer than fifteen dolls, all given to her by thoughtful friends, she +wanted a new one. These fifteen dolls were very good ones, especially +the faithful old Arthur John, a wooden gentleman of strong affections +and no nose worth mentioning, yet nothing would do but she must have an +aristocratic pink wax lady in white muslin, that hung in a certain shop +window and stared hard all day at the little ragamuffins who pressed +their faces against the pane and said, "O my, ain't she a beauty!" Why +the little girl wanted her I could never understand, because she had no +expression at all, and my young friend had a brother who had declared +that if any more "sappy wax dummies" were brought into the house, he +would put them to bed in the oven. Still, in spite of this terrible +threat, she did want her, and in her despair she came to me about it.</p> + +<p>'Well,' added the Ameliorator, 'what do you think I did? I made her sit +down by this very table, and I opened this very drawer, and I took out +these very pictures, and as I showed them to her' (here he began to lay +before the bewildered Beryl picture after picture of ragged street +children) 'I told her how these little wretches were forced to run about +all day in the gutters, whether it was wet or fine, cold or warm, +because they had no nurseries, and how they could get very little to +eat, and how the only toys they had were bits of wood and old bottles. +And then and there I made so bold as to suggest to my discontented +friend—who of course had every reason to be unhappy, when her mother, +who already had given her so many nice things, refused to buy her an +expensive doll—that if she were not only to stop wishing for any more +new toys, but were to send a few of those she already had to be given +away to some of these children who had none, why I fancied she would not +be altogether miserable any longer. That is what I told her to do, and +that is what she did, and I believe I may truthfully say it was a +wonderful cure.</p> + +<p>'Then—let me see—yes,' the Ameliorator continued more briskly, 'then +there was a boy, or—shall I say, a little man?—who once consulted me. +The difficulty, if I remember rightly, was intellectual. O yes!—he was +convinced that he, being a wise patriarch of eight or nine, knew more +than the lady engaged by his parents to teach him. So he applied to her +a not very respectful nickname and refused to learn the lessons that she +set him, and swaggered about calling her a beast, which is not the right +attitude of a gentleman (although old enough to know everything) towards +a lady, and made himself as unpleasant as he could.</p> + +<p>'By some chance, one of my cards fell into his hands: he read it and was +fascinated by the words, "Bad governesses punished." He came to me to +arrange for the punishment. The best way, I told him, is shocks. There +is nothing like a shock to bring a governess to her senses. "Now, what +is the last thing in the world your governess expects from you?" I +asked. "Why, that you will learn a lesson of your own accord, without +constant jogs from her." So that if he were to do this, I told him, he +would give her a severe shock, and thus punish her.</p> + +<p>'He went away delighted with the plan. Morning after morning he appeared +in the schoolroom with his task all prepared, and every morning the +governess received a new shock. And when I peeped through the window not +long after, there they sat, close together, she happy after her +punishment, and he happy because (only he didn't know this) he had made +her so. For she was unhappy before—very; but young fellows with exalted +ideas on their own judgment and knowledge have no time to observe the +unhappiness of their governesses or parents, have they, Bertram?'</p> + +<p>Bertram did not answer: this shock system of punishment was new to him. +He felt muddled, but he began to think he would try it. He was not, +however, quite in a condition to see the Ameliorator clearly.</p> + +<p>'And little Bobus doesn't like going to bed?' the Ameliorator asked, +turning to Bobus. 'My dear sir, it can be made the best thing in the +world. Let me tell you how to make it so. Directly you get into bed, +begin to think what pleasant little surprise you can give some one on +the next day: any one, mother or father, cousin or playmate, nurse or +beggar in the street. You will find this such an exciting game that you +will run to bed eagerly when the time comes, and, what is more, it makes +you readier to get up. At any rate, Bobus, try it.</p> + +<p>'And little Aline,' the Ameliorator went on, taking Aline's hand and +beaming down upon her with his kindly eyes, which danced more than ever +behind his round spectacles, 'little Aline prefers cake to bread and +butter! Dear, dear, this is very sad. If she eats three pieces of bread +and butter she may have cake, but not till then. Well, I think I should +advise her to eat those three pieces. Little girls who eat only cake +grow up to be weedy and weak, and unable to do half the good things of +life: they can't skate, and they can't dance, and they can't play games. +So I should advise Aline to eat the bread and butter.'</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="IXA" id="IXA"></a>IX</h2> + +<h3>THE TOKENS</h3> + + +<p>'Now,' said the little old man, 'you must run home or you'll be late for +dinner. But first let me find some little token of our conversation for +each,' and so saying, he went to the drawer labelled 'Prizes for Hard +Work,' and found something for Bertram; and to the drawer labelled +'Gifts for Forgetting Number One,' and found something for Beryl; and to +the drawer labelled 'Presents for Anticipating Wishes,' and found +something for Bobus; and to the drawer labelled 'Rewards for Hard Play,' +and found something for Aline.</p> + +<p>'Now, good-bye,' said he, holding open the door.</p> + +<p>But Bertram, who was always the leader, did not move. He seemed still to +have something on his mind.</p> + +<p>'No, no,' said the Ameliorator, who was a wonderful thought-reader, 'no, +no, there is nothing to pay. Why, I have had the pleasure of your +company for a whole hour! That's payment enough for any one. Now run +along.'</p> + +<p>'But,' Bertram faltered, still not moving, 'I haven't earned the "Prize +for Hard Work."'</p> + +<p>'No,' said each of the others, 'I haven't earned mine either.'</p> + +<p>'Ah!' said the Ameliorator, 'but you are going to.'</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="XA" id="XA"></a>X</h2> + +<h3>THE RETURN</h3> + + +<p>Hand in hand, silently, the four children walked through the city. And +when each one reached home, there, in the branches of the tree before +the house, was its bird in full song.</p> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="The_Schoolboys_Apprentice" id="The_Schoolboys_Apprentice"></a>The Schoolboy's Apprentice</h2> + + + +<h4><i>TO L. F. G.</i></h4> + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> + +<p>Once upon a time there was a schoolboy called Chimp. Chimp was not his +name: his name was Alexander Joseph Chemmle. Chimp was short for +chimpanzee, an animal which his schoolfellows agreed that he was like.</p> + +<p>Chimp usually spent his holidays in his uncle's family; but one summer +he travelled on a visit to his father, who was British Consul in a +foreign port, so far away that the boy had only a few days at home +before it was time again to join the steamer for England.</p> + +<p>Chimp, who was always adventurous, had been at sea for only a week on +the return journey, when one evening at dusk he lost his hold as he was +clambering out to the end of the main crosstrees, and fell overboard. +The other passengers were listening to a concert in the saloon +('screeching' Chimp had called it, when he took refuge in the chief +engineer's room), and, work being over, the crew were for'ard smoking, +so that there was no one except the first officer and the man at the +wheel to hear the shout that Chimp sent up from the water. As a matter +of fact both men heard it, but it caused them to do no more than say to +themselves at the same moment, 'There's that boy again! Up to some +mischief, I'll be bound.' No help, therefore, came to Chimp. The great +black ship glided by, the screw threshed the water into blinding foam, +and when he could see and think again, Chimp was alone in the ocean.</p> + +<p>Chimp was a good swimmer. He struck out at once vigorously in the +direction of the island which they had passed at sundown. The sea was as +smooth as a pond and quite warm, and after several minutes had passed, +the boy turned over on his back and floated comfortably, moving his arms +just enough to give him an impetus towards the shore. Although he was +upset by the accident which had so suddenly substituted the water for +the ship (and it was nearing supper time, and there were always ices for +supper!), Chimp was not a boy at all given to fear, and he could think +of his new plight with composure. His first calm thought was regret for +the mongoose which he was taking back to school, 'although,' as he said +to himself, 'the chances are, Porker wouldn't let me keep it,' Porker +being the way in which Chimp spoke of Dr. Cyril Bigley Plowden, +Principal of Witherson College. His second feeling was keenness to play +Robinson Crusoe in earnest. Chimp and other boys had often on +half-holidays made believe that an island in the river was Juan +Fernandez, but the game usually began with one fight to decide who +should be Robinson, and ended with another to check the arrogance of +Friday. Now, however, he was but an hour or so from an uninhabited +island (of course it was uninhabited) and bothered by no rival for chief +honours. He decided that to fall into the sea from a steamer at night +was a lark. But a little while afterwards he thought of sharks and +remembered, with something of a pang, good times in England; then he +wondered what would happen on the ship when they missed him; then he +glowed at the anticipation of the other boys' envy when they learned +where he had been; then he thought of sharks again; and then his feet +touched the bottom.</p> + +<p>When Chimp at last crawled out of the water, he was nigh dead beat. In +the soft still light which the moon poured down he could see beyond the +beach a dark strip which seemed to promise a bed. He staggered blindly +over the stones to this refuge, found that it was grass, and, sinking +upon it, was in a moment asleep.</p> + +<p>The sun was high and hot when Chimp awoke. For a moment he looked around +him bewildered, wondering why the dream would not finish: then he +remembered everything. At the same moment he was conscious, as he +afterwards expressed it, that he had had nothing to eat for a hundred +years. Chimp stood up, yawned the stiffness out of his bones, and set +forth to seek for food and claim his kingdom. He made at once for the +highest ground and gathered the island in a bird's-eye view. It seemed +to be about eight miles long and three broad, mainly rock, bare and red +as a brick. There were a few trees and some wide patches of rank grass. +Not a sign of human life was to be seen, but swift green lizards shot +across the ground at Chimp's feet, a million grasshoppers shrilled into +his ears, and white gulls with cruel eyes hovered and wheeled above him. +The prospect did not cheer Robinson Crusoe II., but he set out for the +interior of the island, searching every miniature valley for a spring, +every tree and shrub for fruit. But he sought in vain. Then recollecting +stories of the toothsomeness of turtles' eggs baked in the sand, Chimp +turned to the shore again and explored the coast. At the end of three +hours he said disgustedly, 'What a liar Ballantyne was!' and was just +sinking down exhausted, when his heart gave a big <i>plump!</i> and stood +still, for there before him was a well-trodden path.</p> + +<p>At first, hungry as he was, Chimp's feeling was grief at the discovery +that after all the island was not uninhabited, but his regret soon faded +before the anticipation of the meal he would devour in the abode to +which the pathway led, and he struck into it with new vigour, taking the +inland direction. The path rose with every step. At last, a mile or so +from the sea, it turned abruptly round a boulder, and Chimp suddenly +found himself in the presence of an elderly man with a long grey beard, +who was sitting at a table in the entrance of a cave, writing.</p> + +<p>The meeting seemed to be the most unexpected thing that had ever +happened to either of them, for the elderly man rose with a start that +upset both ink and table, and Chimp caught himself looking round for +something to cling to for support. Not finding anything, he sat down on +the ground and stared at the elderly man. He would have liked to have +gone forward to pick up the ink-bottle, but dared not, on account of a +peculiar feeling in his knees. Meanwhile the elderly man stared at the +boy, and Chimp wondered if he ever would speak, and if it would be in +English when he did. After a long pause the elderly man picked up the +ink. Then looking at Chimp still more curiously through his spectacles, +he spoke.</p> + +<p>'What are you?' he asked, in good English.</p> + +<p>'My name,' said Chimp, 'is Alexander Joseph Chemmle.'</p> + +<p>'No, no,' the elderly man replied, 'I mean, what are you—what? Not a +boy, are you? Not really and truly a boy! Oh say, say you are a boy!'</p> + +<p>'Yes,' said Chimp, although for the moment, so intense and unreasonable +was the other's excitement about the matter, he almost doubted it. 'Yes, +I'm a boy.'</p> + +<p>'A boy! a boy!' the elderly man exclaimed joyfully. 'Eureka!' Then he +grew calmer, and continued: 'Dear me, this is very interesting. A most +fortunate chance! A boy, you say. How extremely happy an accident. Now +what kind of boy might you be?'</p> + +<p>Chimp was puzzled. 'I suppose,' he thought, 'I ought to call myself a +good boy, and yet that isn't exactly how Porker would describe me. And +what is more, good boys are such saps.' Then he spoke aloud: 'Well, sir, +I'm a fairish specimen of a boy, I think.'</p> + +<p>'Good!' said the elderly man. 'Good! An average boy. So much the better. +And what does it feel like to be a boy?'</p> + +<p>'Whew!' said Chimp to himself, 'I came for breakfast, and all I seem to +be getting is an exam.' However, he did his best to answer the question. +'Why, sir,' he said aloud, 'as long as you don't get too many lines and +swishings, it feels good to be a boy. But swishing makes it feel bad +sometimes.'</p> + +<p>'Lines?' inquired the other. 'Swishings? What are they?'</p> + +<p>'Why,' said Chimp, 'when Porker canes you, that's swishing, and lines +are passages from Virgil which you have to copy out if you make +howlers—I mean, if you make mistakes.'</p> + +<p>'Yes, yes,' said the elderly man, a little vaguely. 'And so it's good to +be a boy?' he added.</p> + +<p>A happy thought struck Chimp. 'It is good,' he replied; 'but there are +other times when it's bad, besides those I mentioned. When—when you're +hungry, for instance.'</p> + +<p>'Ah!' exclaimed the elderly man, rising from the table. 'I was +forgetting. You must pardon me, Alexander Joseph Chemmle. I have, I +fear, nothing to offer you but biscuits and tinned meats. Do you care +for tinned meats? I keep most kinds.'</p> + +<p>'I like bloater paste,' Chimp said. 'I always take a pot or two back to +school.'</p> + +<p>'Ah!' cried his host eagerly, 'you like bloater paste best? That's +famous! So do I. A community of taste!'</p> + +<p>He disappeared into the cave, and in a minute or so came forth again, +bearing the bloater paste and a plate in one hand, and the biscuits and +a knife in the other. 'Now,' he said, 'fall to, and while you are eating +these I must try to find something else. Tinned pears—do you like +them?'</p> + +<p>Chimp mumbled that he did. He was eating with more enjoyment than he +ever had eaten in his life. Ambrosia was nothing to bloater paste.</p> + +<p>'It is wonderful—our tastes coincide in everything,' said the elderly +man as he entered the cave again. He returned with a tin of pears and +some marmalade, a jug of water and a glass. Then he sat on a camp stool +and observed his guest.</p> + +<p>It was not until Chimp was well forward with the pears that his host +spoke again. 'I am sorry, Alexander Joseph Chemmle,' he said, 'to have +kept you waiting so long, for I take it that this is not your customary +appetite—that you were, in fact, unusually, if not painfully, hungry. +But I was so interested by the sight of a real boy that I could think of +nothing else. You see, I have never met with a boy before.'</p> + +<p>Chimp opened his eyes as wide almost as his mouth. 'But,' he began in +his astonishment, 'they are as common as dirt, boys are. There's heaps +of them—loads.'</p> + +<p>'True,' the other made answer, 'true. But when one abandons the world, +and, embracing the profession of the eremite, devotes one's life to +solitude and reflection, one is deprived of the pleasure of intercourse +with so attractive a personality as that of the average boy.'</p> + +<p>'Ye-es,' dubiously from Chimp. 'But,' he added, 'you were a boy yourself +once.'</p> + +<p>'No,' the Hermit made reply. 'Never.'</p> + +<p>'Never a boy!' Chimp exclaimed. 'Well, that beats everything.'</p> + +<p>'Never,' repeated the recluse. 'You see,' he remarked in explanation, 'I +was articled by my parents to a hermit at a very tender age—to the +learned man, in fact, who preceded me in the tenancy of this modest +cell. We plunged immediately into the fascinating study of metaphysics, +and the period of boyhood slipped by unnoticed.'</p> + +<p>Chimp whistled,—he had no words adequate to the occasion.</p> + +<p>'For many years,' the Hermit continued, 'I did not feel the loss of this +experience, being deeply engrossed in other subjects; but now, in the +fall of life, I find myself regretting it keenly. Much as I love my +studies, much as I am attached to the solitary life, I sometimes think +it a finer thing to have been a boy even than to have been a hermit.'</p> + +<p>Chimp thought it would be kind of him to say something cheery, yet could +hit upon nothing but, 'Oh no, not at all,' just as if the Hermit had +apologised for treading on his toe; yet it seemed to please the old man.</p> + +<p>'However,' he broke off, 'this is by the way. Come, Alexander Joseph +Chemmle, tell me about your adventures; how did you find your way to +this island? How is it you are alone? Tell me everything.'</p> + +<p>Chimp, wincing a little at the appalling formality of the Hermit's mode +of address, began. By the time his story was finished it was evening, +for the Hermit asked numberless questions which sent Chimp off on +numberless side tracks of narrative. At the end of the recital the +bloater paste was produced again, and Chimp again ate heartily.</p> + +<p>'Now,' said the Hermit, 'I will show you something of the island.'</p> + +<p>So saying, he took his staff and they set forth. First they visited the +spring whence the Hermit brought water, and then climbing to a peak of +rock, the Hermit described the island as it lay beneath them.</p> + +<p>'There,' said he finally, indicating the little creek to which the +footpath led, 'that is where the boat lands that once a year brings me +my provisions. It puts off from my Aunt Amelia's yacht—<i>The Tattooed +Quaker</i>. My Aunt Amelia is the only relative that remains to me. It is +she who supplies the tinned meats and the pears. She really has +admirable taste, although her choice in names may be a little fantastic. +In addition to the provisions, it is my aunt's custom to send a letter +beseeching me to return in the yacht to England, and declaring that if I +do not, that particular supply of food will be the last. For forty years +she has done this. She is a noble woman, my Aunt Amelia.'</p> + +<p>'When is the boat due?' Chimp asked, thinking more of its possible +effect upon himself than upon the Hermit.</p> + +<p>'Soon, soon,' the old man replied, with something very like a sigh. 'In +a fortnight's time, in fact.'</p> + +<p>'What a pity!' said Chimp. 'And I say, sir,' he added, 'how decent to be +you. Only there ought to be some niggers.'</p> + +<p>The Hermit sighed. They walked back without speaking, and not ten +minutes had passed before Chimp was sound asleep in a corner of the +cave, while the Hermit lay gazing at the stars.</p> + +<p>On awaking, Chimp found that the cave was empty. For a moment he thought +himself still dreaming, but the table laid for breakfast recalled him to +facts, and he fell to thinking of the Hermit. 'Rum old beggar!' he +mused. 'A screw loose somewhere, I guess.' When the Hermit returned, it +was plain that the old man had something on his mind, as the saying is. +He spoke not at all at breakfast, except, when laying the table, to +remark that potted ham and chicken make a pleasing variety upon bloater +paste. But after breakfast, placing one seat in the shade for Chimp and +one for himself, he talked.</p> + +<p>'I have been thinking deeply, Alexander Joseph Chemmle,' he began. +'During the night I have reviewed my life, and now more than ever I am +conscious of the limiting influence exerted upon a philosopher by the +loss of boyhood. The suspicion has been with me for years: it is now a +certainty. You are not likely, my young friend, to be with me long, for +<i>The Tattooed Quaker</i> will, of course, carry you back to England next +week. But in the intervening time I want you, so far as is within your +power, to make a boy of me. I put myself unreservedly in your hands. +Consider me your apprentice. Will you do this?' The Hermit watched +Chimp's face anxiously.</p> + +<p>Chimp was staggered completely. A screw loose, he had thought; but +surely it was the height of madness for a man to wish to be a boy again. +Chimp and his companions spent a large part of their time in wishing to +be men: the other side was not to be believed. But he pulled himself +together with the thought that to humour this old lunatic might be +funny, and would last only a week. After all, to find a cracked man on +the island was better than to find no man at all, now that Ballantyne +had been proved to be so wrong. And just then the boy caught a glimpse +of the Hermit's anxious eager eyes. 'All right,' he said quickly, 'I'm +game. But it'll be rather difficult, you know.'</p> + +<p>'Difficult!' exclaimed the Hermit, with an expression of mingled pain +and alarm. 'How? Not seriously, I trust?'</p> + +<p>'Oh no!' said Chimp; 'but you're rather old, you see, and boys are not +in the habit of wearing beards three feet long; although,' he added +encouragingly, noting the look of disappointment on the Hermit's face, +'I don't see why they shouldn't. Why, there was a fellow at our school +who had whiskers before he was fourteen, and we shaved them too. Tied +him down and cut off one side one day and the other the next. After that +he bought a razor.'</p> + +<p>'Is—is that action typical of the boy?' the Hermit asked.</p> + +<p>'Well, they get up to larks now and then,' Chimp admitted.</p> + +<p>'As time is short,' said the Hermit, 'I am disposed to begin this +morning—at once. That is not too soon for you, I hope, Alexander Joseph +Ch——?'</p> + +<p>'Oh, please don't,' Chimp interrupted. 'You know, boys don't call each +other by all their names like that; they either stick to the last one or +invent a nickname.'</p> + +<p>'I am sorry to have hurt your feelings,' said the Hermit. 'If you will +tell me your nickname I will call you by it.'</p> + +<p>'I think,' replied Chimp, unwilling to explain his own, 'that perhaps +we'd better begin now and give each other fresh ones.'</p> + +<p>'Very well,' said the Hermit, after a minute's thought, 'I shall call +you Simian, or, for the sake of brevity, Sim.'</p> + +<p>'Simeon?' cried Chimp. 'Oh, that's not the thing at all! A nickname +should describe a fellow, you know—it shouldn't be just another +ordinary name.'</p> + +<p>'Yes,' replied his apprentice, 'and I mean to call you Sim, an +abbreviation of Simian. And what will you call me?'</p> + +<p>Chimp pondered awhile. 'I shall call you,' he said at length, +'Billykins, because of your long goat's beard.'</p> + +<p>And thus began the Hermit's apprenticeship.</p> + +<p>'It is too hot for footer,' said Chimp, after he had collected his +thoughts, 'so we will make a start with a little cricket practice. +Cricket,' he explained, 'is a game—the best game in the world. You +ought to see W. G. and Ranji. But of course you don't know who they are. +Oh dear, oh dear, what you are missing out here! W. G., that's W. G. +Grace, the champion of the world. Your beard, Billykins, must have been +rather like his a few years ago. And Ranji, that's Ranjitsinhji.'</p> + +<p>'Yes, yes,' the Hermit remarked feebly, depressed by the weight of his +stupendous ignorance.</p> + +<p>Chimp went on with fine authority. 'Now, while I am cramming this sock +with stuff to make a ball, you be sharpening these sticks for wickets. +You've got a knife, I suppose?'</p> + +<p>The Hermit admitted that he had not.</p> + +<p>'What!' cried Chimp; 'no knife? Why, you'll never be a boy without a +knife. Let me look at your pockets?'</p> + +<p>The Hermit had but one pocket, and a handkerchief was all it held.</p> + +<p>'Awfully clean,' was Chimp's contemptuous comment. 'And nothing else? +Oh, this will never do! Look at mine now,' and turning out his pockets, +he displayed a double-bladed knife containing several implements, +including a corkscrew and an attachment for extracting stones from +horses' feet, a piece of string, a watch spring, twenty or thirty shot, +a button, a magnet, a cog-wheel, a pencil, a match-box, a case of +foreign stamps all stuck together with salt water, a whistle, a +halfpenny with a hole in it, and a soaked and swollen cigar which the +Captain had given him.</p> + +<p>'Are all these things quite necessary?' the Hermit asked humbly.</p> + +<p>'No,' said Chimp, 'not quite all. The knife is, and the string is, and a +fellow likes his smoke, you know. Collecting stamps is rather decent, +but you needn't unless you want to. There's butterflies and birds' eggs, +if you like. The other things are useful: the more you have the better +for you.'</p> + +<p>'String,' said the Hermit, 'I possess—but no pocket-knife. But if you +permit it, I will carry my table-knife in future. 'Tis a simple weapon, +I know: but on the other hand you see that on this island the +opportunities of extracting stones from horses' hoofs are rare.'</p> + +<p>'I suppose it must do,' said Chimp doubtfully. 'But you must add a few +other things, or we shan't have anything to swap. Boys are great at +swapping, you know.'</p> + +<p>'Swapping?' the Hermit asked.</p> + +<p>'Yes: when you want one thing, giving another for it. For instance, if +you had a white rat' (the Hermit shuddered) 'and I gave you a brass +cannon for it, that would be a swap.'</p> + +<p>'Very well,' the Hermit replied seriously, 'I will add a few things; +but, if you don't mind, not rats of any colour, nor in fact any live +stock.'</p> + +<p>'Just as you like,' said the magnanimous Chimp. 'You wouldn't do for +Billy Lincolne though: he usually carries half a dozen frogs in his +trousers' pockets.'</p> + +<p>When the cricket gear was complete, Chimp stepped out twenty-two yards +and pitched the stumps. 'You go in first,' he said.</p> + +<p>The Hermit seized the bat.</p> + +<p>'Now all you have to do at first,' Chimp continued, 'is to keep the ball +out of the wicket. Hit it any way you like, and hold your bat straight.'</p> + +<p>The Hermit obeyed to the letter. To Chimp's intense astonishment he +punished the bowling all round, pulling off balls to square leg in a +shameless fashion.</p> + +<p>Chimp was kept busy, and at last he grew almost vexed. 'Well, you mayn't +have much science,' he cried, as, nearly out of breath, he flung himself +down after some miles of running, 'but you've got a gorgeous eye. Why, +you hit everything. You've played before, haven't you?' he added +suspiciously.</p> + +<p>The Hermit smiled again. 'A little,' he admitted. 'Yes, my late +instructor, the sage to whom I was confided by my parents many, many +years ago, he and I occasionally had a game together. It was our only +recreation. I thought it hardly worth while to mention it, expecting +that all skill had left me.'</p> + +<p>'By jingo! though, it hasn't,' Chimp exclaimed. 'You're a regular W. G. +in your way. But, I say, another time you know how to do a thing you +might let a fellow know first.'</p> + +<p>'This is too silly,' was Chimp's persistent thought during the next few +days, but he kept up the game of make-believe like a hero. As a matter +of fact, it was sound amusement to explore the island and plunge on +sudden impulses into a score of high-spirited enterprises, although the +presence of the old man panting at his side touched him rather sadly now +and then. The Hermit, however, endured stolidly and pluckily, and +neither of them ever let the time appear to drag.</p> + +<p>Chimp and his apprentice bathed together, and hunted for anemones among +the rocks; they gave chase to butterflies and lizards; they told +stories; they even pretended to be Robinson Crusoe and Friday, the part +of Friday falling to the Hermit.</p> + +<p>'You see, Billykins,' Chimp said, 'you are better suited to the part: +you can make such a whacking footprint.'</p> + +<p>'I think I am progressing well, Simian,' remarked Chimp's apprentice at +breakfast one morning, 'although I must admit that many impulses and +movements that come naturally to you are acquired by me with difficulty. +Last evening's attempt at leap-frog, for example, has left me so stiff +that I can hardly move, and I assure you that it has never before +occurred to me to climb that tree all the years I have known it. Perhaps +in a week or so, when my hands are healed, I may try again. But I can +see, Sim, that it must be very good to be a boy—very, very good.'</p> + +<p>'Why yes, Billykins,' Chimp broke in, 'but you don't know really +anything about it yet. And I'm afraid you can't know on this island. +There isn't the company and there isn't the means. I can't even make you +an apple-pie bed, when you sleep in a single blanket; and a booby-trap +needs a door. And when there are only two people, and no one else to +laugh, it's no fun to stick a cactus in a fellow's chair. Tuck, too! +What do you know about tuck? What can you know about tuck when there's +no shop for chocolate and Turkish Delight and things like that? Tinned +stuff is all very well, but it gets jolly tedious. And birds'-nesting, +and ratting, and setting night lines, and dodging game-keepers, and +breaking into orchards! You haven't even elastic to make a catty with, +or so simple a contrivance as a fish-hook. Still we might rig up a bow +and arrow.'</p> + +<p>'But,' the Hermit objected, 'there is nothing to shoot.'</p> + +<p>'Oh yes!' said Chimp, 'sea-gulls.'</p> + +<p>'We can't eat sea-gulls,' his apprentice replied. Then anxiously, 'Boys +don't eat sea-gulls, do they?'</p> + +<p>'Why, no, Billykins; but that isn't the thing. Bringing them down is the +thing. It's sport.'</p> + +<p>That evening after tea, Chimp approached his apprentice with a troubled +expression.</p> + +<p>'I think I ought to tell you, Billykins,' he goaded himself to say, +'that some boys fall in love. Not all, mind. I never did it myself—I +think it's footle—but lots and lots do. I suppose you'd like to try it, +you're so thorough; though I don't see how you're going to manage +exactly.'</p> + +<p>'You mean,' said the Hermit, 'on an island so poor in opportunities? +Yes, it would be difficult. Still, give me the outline.'</p> + +<p>'Well, Billykins, it isn't very clear,' said Chimp. 'I believe though, +that the fellow feels sort of jolly inside while it's going on. But it +never lasts long.'</p> + +<p>'And it's not compulsory?' the Hermit asked in some trepidation.</p> + +<p>'Oh no, Billy, not at all.'</p> + +<p>'Then we will dismiss love along with sport,' was the Hermit's decision.</p> + +<p>Thus, in games and rambles and conversation, the time passed by, until +it was the evening before the day that would bring <i>The Tattooed +Quaker</i>, and Chimp and his apprentice were sitting before the cave, +watching the sinking sun.</p> + +<p>'Well,' said the Hermit, 'only a few more hours, Sim, and you will be on +the way home again. Then I must to work once more. My great work on Man +and his place in Society, scientifically considered, awaits me. But I +shall miss you, Sim,' the old man added; 'you have been a very pleasant +chapter in my life. Don't forget me altogether, will you; and you'll pay +my Aunt Amelia a visit, won't you, and tell her about me?'</p> + +<p>Chimp had a little difficulty in replying. He felt girlish, that is to +say, gulpy and tearful. At last, 'Why don't you come back too?' he +asked.</p> + +<p>'I?' said the Hermit. 'Oh no, there is no place for Hermits in your +country.'</p> + +<p>'I don't know about that,' said Chimp, speaking more naturally again. +'You might make a lot of money showing yourself in caravans at fairs. +People would go miles to see a hermit. I paid a penny once to see a fat +woman, and there was no end of a squash in the tent. You must come. I'll +take you to my uncle's, where I live in the vacs. and Jim—that's my +cousin—Jim and me'll give you a ripping time.'</p> + +<p>The Hermit smiled sadly. 'No, no,' he said. After a short silence he +spoke again. 'Tell me, Sim—I ask merely out of curiosity—are boys +always contented with their surroundings?'</p> + +<p>'Not by a long chalk,' Chimp answered. 'They're always running away.'</p> + +<p>'Ah!' said the Hermit. 'How often have you run away?'</p> + +<p>'Well, not at all, so far,' said Chimp, 'although Goring minor and I did +get all ready to bunk once, only Mother Porker copped us on the landing. +But we meant it, I can tell you. We were going to walk to Portsmouth, +sleeping under hay ricks, and hide ourselves as stowaways on board a +man-of-war, and show up when we got to sea, and do something heroic to +please the Captain, and after that win loads of prize-money and come +back covered with glory. Boys often do that in books. But old Mother +Porker copped us on the landing.'</p> + +<p>'Bed-time,' said the Hermit.</p> + +<p>When they rose the next morning, there, in the offing, heading straight +for the island, was <i>The Tattooed Quaker</i>. They hurried to the peak, and +the Hermit waved his handkerchief. The signal was seen on deck, and an +answering flag scurried up to the mast-head. After breakfast Chimp and +his apprentice walked down to the creek to welcome the yacht's boat.</p> + +<p>The Captain looked at Chimp in amazement. 'What, Master Augustus!' he +said when he had shaken hands with the Hermit and delivered Aunt +Amelia's letter, 'what! have you got a pupil, then?'</p> + +<p>'No,' replied the Hermit, 'he's not my pupil, he's your passenger'; and +so saying, he introduced Chimp, and then stood aside to see what his +aunt had to say; while the crew waited for the Captain's orders to move +the stores from the boat to the cave.</p> + +<p>When the Hermit had finished reading, he returned the letter to its +envelope and slipped it into his pocket.</p> + +<p>'Well, Master Augustus, are you coming back with us?' said the Captain, +exactly as he had asked the question for the past forty years.</p> + +<p>The Hermit laughed in negative reply, exactly as he had laughed once a +year for the past forty years.</p> + +<p>'Now then, my men, be quick,' said the Captain.</p> + +<p>In the boat was a large hamper in which to convey the stores over the +rocks to the cave. Two of the sailors held it at each end, and the +Hermit accompanied them, while Chimp and the Captain strolled away +together. Three times the hamper was borne from the boat to the cell. +There then remained only a dozen or so of parcels, which the men might +easily carry in their hands. This time the Hermit did not accompany +them.</p> + +<p>When the last of the stores were safely within the cave the boatswain +blew his whistle as a signal that all was ready, and Chimp and the +Captain of <i>The Tattooed Quaker</i> hurried back to the creek.</p> + +<p>'Where is Master Augustus?' the Captain inquired. 'The young gentleman +wants to say good-bye to him.'</p> + +<p>'He must be in the cave,' said Chimp. 'I'll run and see.'</p> + +<p>But the cave was empty. Chimp climbed the rock before the entrance and +called, 'Bi-i-illykins, Bi-i-illykins!' No answer. 'I must have missed +him on his way back to the creek,' he thought, and hurried to the shore +again.</p> + +<p>'Be quick!' cried the Captain. 'Time's up!'</p> + +<p>'But I can't find him,' Chimp called, floundering from boulder to +boulder.</p> + +<p>'Can't find him?' echoed the Captain. 'That's very rum. I suppose he +wants to avoid the pain of parting. Come along; we can't stay any longer +now.'</p> + +<p>So with a heavy heart Chimp took his place in the boat and watched how +with every stroke of the oars the distance widened between himself and +the island.</p> + +<p>'Weigh the anchor!' cried the Captain, the moment they were on board.</p> + +<p><i>The Tattooed Quaker</i> was a superb yacht, and in the ardour of +exploration Chimp forgot the Hermit and everything else. He examined the +cabin and the berths, he made friends with the steward, he descended +into the lazarette, where peering into the refrigerator, he found half a +game pie, and forthwith devoured it. He conversed learnedly with the +engineers about the size of the cylinders; he decided which hammock +would best minister to his own comfort; he overhauled the Captain's +stock of books, and by the time these duties were accomplished <i>The +Tattooed Quaker</i> was well out to sea, and the island was only a thin +line on the horizon. And then a feeling of sadness for the loss of poor +old Billykins, left there all alone again, took hold of the boy, and he +retired dismally to his hammock to mope.</p> + +<p>After dinner, however, at which meal he revived marvellously, he was in +gay enough spirits to tell the story of the Hermit's apprenticeship. The +Captain was in ecstasies. 'What a yarn for the old lady!' he remarked +again and again. 'What a yarn!'</p> + +<p>Suddenly, as they sat in the darkling cabin, there appeared in the +doorway a figure which seemed in the gloom to resemble an elderly man +with a long grey beard.</p> + +<p>'Mercy! What's that?' the Captain shouted, leaping from his chair and +drawing back. 'Who are you? What do you want?'</p> + +<p>The figure took a step into the room. 'Simian,' it said, 'don't you +recognise me?'</p> + +<p>'Why, it's Billykins!' cried Chimp, running forward and seizing the +Hermit's hand.</p> + +<p>'Great Heavens! Master Augustus!' exclaimed the Captain. 'Where did you +spring from?'</p> + +<p>'From the hamper!' said the Hermit.</p> + +<p>Chimp and the Captain stared at each other for a moment, and +then—'What!' roared the Captain, 'a stowaway! Well, you're something +like an apprentice, you are!' And he smote the table till the ship +trembled, and laughed like the north wind.</p> + +<p>The Hermit waited patiently till the storm abated, while Chimp gazed at +him in wonderment and admiration.</p> + +<p>Then, in the lulls of the Captain's merriment, he explained. 'You see,' +he said, 'this boy has changed me considerably. I see things with new +eyes. And when I was standing there by the boat, the desire to run away +and be for ever quit of the island and solitude came strongly upon me.'</p> + +<p>'Oh, what a model apprentice!' the Captain exclaimed.</p> + +<p>'So,' continued the Hermit, a little abashed, 'well—so I crawled into +the hamper.'</p> + +<p>'Hooray!' cried Chimp; it's splendid. But aren't you hungry?'</p> + +<p>'Hungry?' said the Captain, 'I should think he is. Steward!' he called, +'bring some supper for Master Augustus.'</p> + +<p>The steward came running into the cabin and stood transfixed—all eyes. +His appearance set the Captain off again; 'Don't be scared,' he said; +'he's alive, right enough.'</p> + +<p>'I didn't see the gentleman come aboard,' the steward found words to +say.</p> + +<p>'No,' said the Captain, 'no more didn't I. No more didn't no one. Master +Augustus has his own way of coming aboard.'</p> + +<p>At this the Hermit laughed too, and the spell being broken, the steward +brought supper as to a man of flesh and blood.</p> + +<p>'So I'm a runaway, Sim,' the Hermit said cheerily when he had finished; +'and there was no Mother Porker to catch me on the landing.'</p> + +<p>'Catch you? No! You're A1 at it!' Chimp replied.</p> + +<p>'Yes,' resumed the Hermit, stretching his limbs, 'we're going to be +comrades again. But when we're in England, mind, no fairs, Sim, no +caravans.'</p> + +<p>Chimp laughed.</p> + +<p>'And we'll go and see Ranji,' said the Hermit.</p> + +<h4>THE END</h4> + + + +<hr style="width: 65%;" /> +<h2><a name="The_Dumpy_Books_for_Children" id="The_Dumpy_Books_for_Children"></a>The Dumpy Books for Children.</h2> + +<p>Selected by <span class="smcap">E. V. Lucas.</span></p> + +<p>I. <span class="smcap">The Flamp, The Ameliorator, and The Schoolboy's Apprentice</span>, <i>by E. V. +LUCAS</i></p> + +<p>II. <span class="smcap">Mrs. Turner's Cautionary Stories</span></p> + +<p>III. <span class="smcap">The Bad Family</span>, <i>by Mrs. Fenwick</i></p> + +<p>IV. <span class="smcap">Little Black Sambo</span>, <i>by Helen Bannerman</i>. With Pictures in colours +by the Author</p> + +<p>V. <span class="smcap">The Bountiful Lady</span>, <i>by Thomas Cobb</i></p> + +<p>VI. <span class="smcap">A Cat Book</span>, Portraits <i>by H. Officer Smith</i>, Characteristics <i>by E. +V. LUCAS</i></p> + + +<div class="figleft"> +<img src="images/illus2.jpg" alt=""/> +</div> + +<div class="figright"> +<img src="images/illus3.jpg" alt=""/> +</div> + + + + + + + + +<pre> + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Flamp, The Ameliorator, and The +Schoolboy's Apprentice, by E. V. 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V. Lucas + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Flamp, The Ameliorator, and The Schoolboy's Apprentice + +Author: E. V. Lucas + +Release Date: November 10, 2009 [EBook #30445] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE FLAMP *** + + + + +Produced by David Edwards, Mary Meehan and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This +file was produced from images generously made available +by The Internet Archive) + + + + + + + + + + The Flamp, The Ameliorator, and The Schoolboy's Apprentice + + By E. V. LUCAS + + +LONDON: GRANT RICHARDS +1900 + +_First printed October_ 1897 +_Reprinted December_ 1897 + " _August_ 1899 + " _December_ 1900 + + + + +_CONTENTS_ + + +_The Flamp_ + +_The Ameliorator_ + +_The Schoolboy's Apprentice_ + + + + +The Flamp + + +_TO MOLLY AND HILDA_. + + _That sunny afternoon in May,_ + _How stealthily we crept away,_ + _We three--(Good things are done in threes:_ + _That is, good things in threes are done_ + _When you make two and I make one.)--_ + _To hatch our small conspiracies!_ + + _Between the blossomy apple-trees_ + _(You recollect?) we sped, and then_ + _Safe in the green heart of the wood_ + _We breathed again._ + _The purple flood the bluebells made_ + _Washed round about us where we stood,_ + _While voices, where the others played,_ + _Assured us we were not pursued._ + + _A fence to climb or wriggle through,_ + _A strip of meadow wet with dew_ + _To cross, and lo! before us flared_ + _The clump of yellow gorse we shared_ + _With five young blackbirds and their mother._ + _There, close beside our partners' nest,_ + _And free from Mr. C. (that pest!),_ + _And careless of the wind and damp,_ + _We framed the story of_ The Flamp. + + _And O! Collaborators kind,_ + _The wish is often in my mind,_ + _That we, in just such happy plight,--_ + _With Chanctonbury Ring in sight,--_ + _Some day may frame another._ + + E. V. L. + 1896. + + + + +The Flamp + + + + +I + + +Once upon a time there dwelt in a far country two children, a sister and +a brother, named Tilsa and Tobene. Tilsa was twelve and Tobene was ten, +and they had grown up, as it were, hand in hand. Their father died when +Tobene was only a little piece of pink dimpled dough, and when their +mother died too, a few years after, old Alison was told to pack up the +things and journey with Tilsa and Tobene to the children's grandfather, +the Liglid (or Lord Mayor) of Ule, whom they had never yet seen. + +Old Alison was their nurse, and she had been their father's nurse before +them. Nothing worth knowing was unknown to old Alison: she could tell +them where the fairies danced by night, and the names and habits of the +different people who live in the stars, and the reason why thrushes' +eggs have black spots and hedge sparrows' none, and how to make Toffee +of Paradise, and a thousand useful and wonderful things beside. + +Alison was old and wrinkled and bent, but there was not a warmer heart +in all the world, and no tongue could say kinder words than hers, and no +hands minister so lovingly to those who needed help. It was said that +Alison had only to look at a sore place and it was healed again. If any +one loved her more than Tilsa it was Tobene; and if any one loved her +more than Tobene it was Tilsa; and old Alison's love for them was as +strong. + +On the day appointed, the three travellers set forth in a chariot driven +by postilions, and in the course of a week's journeying through strange +countries came at last to Ule. + +At the southern gate they were met by the Liglid. They discovered him to +be more than a mere person--a Personage!--with white hair, and little +beady eyes, and a red nose, and a gold-laced hat. + +'Welcome,' said he, 'welcome, Tilsa and Tobene, to the city or Ule.' And +then he kissed the air an inch or two from the cheek of his +grandchildren and led the way to his house. + + + + +II + + +Ule was a little city in the midst of a wide plain, and round about it +was a stout wall. One straight, white road crossed the plain from end to +end, entering the city at the northern gate and leaving it by the +southern gate. The borders of the plain were blue mountains whose peaks +reached the sky, and among these peaks the sun made his bed. At least, +so said the good people of Ule. + +Nothing could shake their faith, for did they not every morning see him +rise from the eastern peaks, fresh and ready for the day's work of +warming the air of Ule, and encouraging the trees of Ule to bear fruit +and the buds of Ule to spread into flowers? And every evening did they +not see him, tired and faint, sink to rest amid the western peaks? The +rare strangers who came now and then to the city and heard this story, +were apt to smile unbelievingly and ask laughingly how, after laying his +head among the pillows on the western side of the plain, the sun was +able to wake up on the opposite side, many miles distant? + +But this question presented no difficulty to the good people of Ule. +'Why,' they would reply a little irritably, for they liked to think that +the sun was theirs and theirs only, 'surely the sun can walk in his +sleep as well--nay, better--than ordinary folk? A baby could see that!' +they would add with a laugh. + +So it was settled that the sun spent all his time in the neighbourhood +of Ule. If the citizens had ever travelled away from their native part, +perhaps they would have thought otherwise; but they rarely, or never, +did. + +'What!' they would say, in pained astonishment, 'leave Ule! Why?' + +'To see the world,' the rash stranger who had made the suggestion might +reply. + +'The world? This is the world,' would be the answer. + +And they really believed that it was. The knowledge that thousands of +other places, no whit less happy than themselves, or even more happy, +were in existence would have made the Ulians quite bad-tempered. And +beyond doubt they were in need of no other cause to excite their anger, +for had they not the Flamp? + + + + +III + + +The Flamp was a monster who dwelt in a cave somewhere in the mountains +that surrounded the plain. Once every year, on Christmas night, the +Flamp came into the city and threw the population into a frenzy of +terror. That on this night of the year, a night set apart for joyfulness +and festivity, the Loathly Beast (for so he was called by orators in the +City Council when they had used the word Flamp often enough) should +invade their city, seeking his prey, seemed to the Ulians an act of the +grossest cruelty and injustice. Almost as soon as darkness had fallen on +Christmas Day, the noises in the city would cease, and the house-holders +and their families would sit within barred doors, with uplifted fingers, +holding their breath, and listening, listening. Then in the far distance +_flob! flob!_ faint, _FLOB!! FLOB!!_ less faint, _FLOB!!! FLOB!!!_ +less faint, every moment louder, coming nearer and nearer, until the +earth shook, and the Flamp's flobbing, flamping feet filled the air with +deafening thuds. + +All keys were turned, all bolts were drawn, all blinds were down, by the +time he entered the city. Not a light was visible. The Flamp was heard +sniffing at this door, fumbling at the handle of that, knocking at +another, while the _shuff! shuff!_ of his sides against the walls was +quite audible. Now and then he would sit down in the road and sigh +deeply, and the trembling listeners near by could hear the splashing of +his tears on the stones. + +After passing through every street, the Flamp would turn out of the gate +once more, and swing off across the plain to his cave in the mountains, +the earth would cease to tremble, and fainter and fainter would sound +his footfalls: _FLOB!!! FLOB!!! FLOB!! FLOB!! flob!_ flob! until +at last all was still again. Then with white faces and shaking limbs the +citizens would crawl to bed, bemoaning their lot. + +The next day the streets were examined to see if any damage had been +done, but nothing was ever found except pools of water where the Flamp +had sat down to sigh and weep. One strange thing was observed after +every visit of the Flamp: these pools were always opposite houses where +there were children. + +'He comes for the children,' was the natural conclusion of the people. +'See how the Monster cries with rage and disappointment when he finds +all doors barred to him.' + +Measures had of course been taken to keep the Flamp out of Ule. The +gates were barricaded: he broke them down as easily as you break new +toys; spring guns were placed in the roads: they went off, the bullets +struck his hide, and, rebounding, smashed several windows, while one +even ricochetted against the statue of the Liglid in the market-place +and chipped off a piece of his Excellency's nose; poisoned meat was +spread about temptingly: in the morning it was found all gathered +together on the doorstep of the Sanitary Inspector. Thus in time it +became clear that the Flamp was not to be checked, and for many years +before the time of our story no other attempts had been made. + + + + +IV + + +The first knowledge of the Flamp which came to Tilsa and Tobene was +gained at breakfast on Christmas morning, when the Liglid warned them of +the precautions necessary in the city at night, and besought them to +make no noise lest the attention of the Loathly Beast should be drawn to +their house. + +'But what is the Flamp?' asked Tilsa. + +'What!' said the Liglid. 'A monster, a dreadful monster!' + +'What is it like?' Tobene asked. + +'Like?' said the Liglid, 'like? Why, no one knows. No one has seen it. +But we can hear it--oh, horrible, horrible!' and the little man covered +his eyes and shuddered. + +'Why does it come?' Tilsa went on. + +'To eat us,' said the Liglid. + +'How many people has it eaten?' said Tobene. + +'Eh!' the Liglid replied. 'Well, I don't--well, I can't exactly--well, I +don't think it has ever eaten any one yet. But it wants to and means +to.' + +'Then how do you know it wants to eat you?' Tilsa persisted. + +'Because,' said the Liglid, 'because it sounds like it.' + +At night the Flamp came, and the city trembled and the earth shook. +Before the Liglid's house it sat down and wept and sighed for fully five +minutes, while within doors the Liglid turned all the colours of the +rainbow with fright. 'His face was fine,' said Tobene afterwards: 'just +like those whirligig things at the end of magic-lantern shows.' From +which remark you may judge that Tobene did not share his grandfather's +alarm, nor did Tilsa, nor old Alison. + +The next morning there was a pool outside the Liglid's house large +enough to sail a boat on. + + + + +V + + +One day not long after the Flamp's visit, Tilsa ran into old Alison's +room to ask something, and was surprised and grieved to find her nurse +rocking to and fro in her chair, with her face covered. Now and then +between her fingers trickled the tears, and Alison sighed deeply. + +'What is it?' Tilsa asked, kneeling beside her. 'Can I do anything, dear +Alison?' + +'Only stay here, dearie,' sobbed the old woman. 'I was remembering +happier days. Stay here, Tilsa dear. All I want is sympathy.' + +So Tilsa stayed, and Alison soon was herself again. 'Thank you, dearie,' +she said as she wiped her eyes and jumped up ready to set to work again; +'you have done me a world of good. Always be sympathetic if you can. No +one knows how grateful it is.' + +It was nearly bed-time, and Tilsa went downstairs to say good-night to +the Liglid. On the way her little white forehead was puckered into lines +like a railway map. + +She entered her grandfather's room softly. The old man was seated on one +side of his desk; on the other was the Town Clerk of Ule. Between them +was a large sheet of paper with these words at the top: + + 'A BILL FOR THE CIRCUMVENTION + OF THE FLAMP.' + +They were too busy to notice Tilsa's entrance. + +'We must hurry it through the House,' the Liglid was saying, 'or there +won't be time. Rigmarola is a long way off.' + +'How long will it take to march the troops here?' the Town Clerk asked. + +'Fully six months,' said the Liglid, 'and then they must be drilled. +They don't fight Flamps every day, and they may find it difficult to fix +upon a mode of attack. What a pity it is,' he added, 'that Ule has no +army.' + +'It will be expensive,' said the Town Clerk. + +'Money,' the Liglid remarked, 'is no object where the circumvention of +the Flamp is concerned. The city has suffered long enough.' + +'True,' said the Town Clerk. + +Tilsa now ventured to interrupt. 'Grandpapa,' she said, 'I've come to +say good-night.' + +'Eh!' said the old man, now seeing her for the first time. 'Good-night? +Oh yes! good-night, my dear'; and after his wont he kissed the air an +inch from her cheek. + +Tilsa did not at once run out of the room as she generally did, rather +glad to have done with the ceremony; instead, she spoke again. +'Grandpapa, I think I know what the Flamp wants when he comes to the +town.' + +'Eh!' cried the Liglid, who was intent on his Bill again. 'Eh! I thought +you'd gone to bed. You know what the Flamp comes for?' he continued. + +'Yes,' said Tilsa, 'it's not to eat people at all, or to do any harm; +it's for sympathy.' + +'Rubbish!' said the Liglid. 'Nonsense--don't meddle with things you +don't understand. Run off to bed at once.' + + + + +VI + + +For a long time Tilsa lay awake, putting two and two together and making +four every time. Then she jumped out of bed and pattered with her bare +feet into Tobene's room. + +'Toby,' she said, gently shaking him. 'Toby!' + +Tobene thrust out his arms and looked at her with eyes that saw nothing. + +'Toby,' Tilsa said again. 'It's me--Tilsa.' + +'Yes,' he said in the tone of one who is not much interested. 'What is +it?' + +'I've found out,' said Tilsa, 'what the Flamp comes for every year.' + +'What?' said Tobene. + +'Sympathy,' said Tilsa. + +'What's sympathy?' said Tobene. + +'Oh, it's putting your arms round people and being sorry for them.' + +'Pooh,' said Tobene, 'if that's sympathy, you must be wrong. He's too +big.' + +But Tilsa was not in the least discouraged. + +'No, Toby,' she said, 'I'm right. And, Toby, Toby, darling, I want to go +and find the Flamp and say I'm sorry for him, and I want you to come +with me.' + +'Me?' cried Tobene, now wide awake. + +'Of course,' said Tilsa. 'We've never done anything alone yet, and I +don't want to begin now.' + +'Well, I suppose it's all right,' Tobene faltered. 'But he's drefful +big, isn't he?' + +'I'm afraid he is rather large,' said Tilsa, as cheerfully as she could. + +'And isn't he mighty ferocious?' + +'Well,' said Tilsa, 'they say so, but nobody's sure. And you know, Toby +dear, what silly things the people here say about the sun shining +nowhere else but on the plain. We know better than that, don't we? Well, +very likely they're just as wrong about the Flamp. So you will go, Toby, +won't you?' + +'Yes, I'll go,' said Tobene. 'When shall we start?' + +'Now,' said Tilsa. 'I want you to dress directly without making any +noise. I'm going to write a little note to Alison,--she's too old to +come with us,--and then I'll be ready too.' + +Tilsa hurried back to her room, and wrote the following note to old +Alison:-- + + MY VERY DEAR ALISON--Toby and me are going to try and find the + Flamp and give him simpithy, which I am sure is what he wants, + because he cries and makes a noise just like you did to-day, only + louder, and that is what you said you wanted, dear Alison. Please + don't be frightened, because you said we ought always to give + simpithy when we can, however much it costs us. Please tell + grandpapa if the Flamp is what I think he is there won't be any + need to sircumvent him. With love and kisses, your loving TILSA. + +Tilsa slipped the note under Alison's door and then fetched Tobene from +his room. They went first to the larder and packed a small basket with +food. Tobene's vote was for blancmange and jam tarts, but Tilsa said +that bread and biscuits were better. + +'How about salt?' Toby asked. + +'Salt?' said Tilsa, 'what for?' + +'To put on the Flamp's tail and catch him,' said Toby. 'Else how are you +going to hug him, Tilsa?' + + + + +VII + + +The two little explorers squeezed through the bars of the northern gate +and for an hour or more hurried as fast as they could along the white +road. They had no plan. All that Tilsa knew was that the Flamp lived +somewhere in the mountains, but whether it was north or south, east or +west, she could not say. + +At the end of the second hour, Tilsa felt certain that it was time to +leave the road, because day was not far off and they were very weary. + +'Cheer up, Toby,' she said. 'We'll soon lie down and have some sleep. +I'm going to shut my eyes and I want you to turn me round three times, +and whichever way I walk then, that way we shall go.' + +This was done, and Tilsa struck off to the left of the road into the +plain. Then after walking for nearly an hour longer, they came to a +little dell with a pool at the bottom and bushes growing on its sides, +and here Tilsa stopped. The two children lay down together under a bush +and at once fell asleep. + +When Tilsa awoke, it was broad day. She roused Tobene, and they went to +the pool and splashed some water over their faces and hands, and then +Tilsa opened the basket. Breakfast consisted only of bread and butter +and biscuits, but as they were hungry it was better than a banquet. The +real business of the day was yet to begin, and Tilsa was wondering how +to set about learning the road, when both children were startled by a +wee voice. + +'I call that piggish,' it said. 'And inconsiderate too.' + +Not seeing any speaker, neither child replied but only stared at each +other in puzzlement. + +'Yes,' the tiny voice continued, 'people can be too tidy. Dropping +crumbs is a bad habit in the house, I know, but out of doors it becomes +a virtue. People who get up first thing in the morning to gorge +themselves with bread and biscuits in this greedy way, and then drop no +crumbs--well, piggish and inconsiderate is what I call them.' + +The accusation aroused Tilsa. 'We didn't gorge,' she said, 'whoever you +are, and we've slept here all night. But here are some crumbs for you, +anyway,' and so saying, she broke up a piece of bread and scattered it +on the ground. + +Immediately a little fiery-crested wren hopped down from a branch of the +bush and began to peck among the grass. + +'Thank you,' he said when he had finished; 'but if you had done it +without being asked it would have been better.' + +'We didn't see you,' said Tobene in excuse. + +'Doesn't matter,' the wren replied; 'birds is everywhere, and always +hungry. Wherever you drop crumbs you may be sure they'll be acceptable. +Remember that. Now, is there anything I can do for you?' + +'Well,' said Tilsa, 'we want to know the way to the Flamp.' + +'Before I tell you,' said the wren, 'you must inform me whether I am +speaking to a boy or a girl.' + +'I am a girl,' said Tilsa. 'Toby here is a boy.' + +'Very well,' the wren answered. 'Then I must talk to Toby. I make it a +rule never to join in friendly conversation with women. They wear my +feathers in their hats.' + +'But men shoot you,' Tobene interposed, angry that Tilsa should be +treated in this way. + +'True,' said the wren, 'true. But so long as there are men, birds must +expect to be shot. It's all in the day's work and must be endured. But +for one's body to go to the milliner's is intolerable. Intolerable.' The +little creature suddenly swallowed its rage, and continued more sweetly: +'Now, as to the Flamp. What you want, Toby, is a Flamp compass.' + +'What's that?' Tobene asked. + +'Why, an ordinary compass points to the north, doesn't it? Well, a Flamp +compass points to the Flamp,' said the wren. 'Then you can find the +way.' + +'But where are we to get one?' was Tobene's very natural question. + +'The hedgehog makes them,' said the wren. 'On the other side of this +dell you will see a line of bushes. The hedgehog lives under the +fourteenth. Knock on the ground three times and he'll come out. Now I +must be off. Good-morning.' And with these words the fiery-crested wren +flitted away. + +At the fourteenth bush the children knocked three times on the ground. + +'Well?' said a surly voice. + +'Please we want a Flamp compass,' said Tilsa. + +At once the hedgehog appeared. 'I beg your pardon,' he said in softer +tones, 'but I mistook you for the rates and taxes, or I shouldn't have +spoke so short. I wasn't expecting customers so early. A Flamp compass? +Why, I don't think I have one in stock. You see, since the Flamps died +off, the demand has been so small that very few are made. There's my +own, which has been in the family for years, but I shouldn't care to +part with that except at a high price.' + +'How much would you call a high price, sir?' Tilsa inquired a little +anxiously. + +'Well, I couldn't let it go for anything less than a Ribston pippin, or +its value,' said the hedgehog. 'But I'm open to offers,' he continued. + +'Toby,' said Tilsa, 'turn out your pockets.' + +Tobene did so, and Tilsa examined the produce with a doubtful face. + +'Please, sir,' she said, 'would you like for the Flamp compass, which +you say is an old one, a piece of string, two marbles, some +toffee--although I'm afraid it's rather mixed up with string--eight +nuts, a screw, a peg-top, and a knife?' + +'The knife will be useful,' said Toby, who was looking on a little +ruefully, but convinced that Tilsa, as usual, was doing the right thing +and therefore must be supported, 'in case any one tries to snub you.' + +'Ah, you needn't trouble about that,' said the hedgehog. 'It's a +difficult matter to snub me. You see,' he added, 'by the nature of his +construction a hedgehog is not easily sat upon. But to business. +Considering that the times are hard, I don't mind accepting your offer, +miss.' + +So saying, to Tilsa's immense delight, the hedgehog retired under the +bush again, and came out carrying the Flamp compass. 'Is there anything +else I can do for you?' he asked. 'Any periwinkle brooms or mallow +cheeses this morning? We have a nice stock of thistle-clocks just in.' + +'No, thank you,' Tilsa replied as they hurried off. 'Nothing more +to-day. Good-morning.' + +The compass was neatly contrived of the cup of an acorn, through the +bottom of which ran a hedgehog's prickle. Balanced on the point was the +needle, a spear of dried grass, and over all was a spider's web to serve +as glass. + + + + +VIII + + +No matter how the Flamp compass was twisted, the needle pointed steadily +to the mountains before them, and the children marched bravely forward. +They were hungry and tired, but Tilsa would as soon have thought of +asking Tobene to carry her as of turning back. As for Tobene, he put one +foot before the other as firmly as he was able, and tried to forget the +loss of his treasures. + +The worst part of the journey was clambering over the hot rocks when the +mountains were reached, and the travellers did at last lose their +resolute cheerfulness, and had just sat down in the shade to have a good +cry, when they suddenly heard the sound of singing. Not exactly singing; +rather a melancholy droning, or chanting, as of a dirge. Listening +intently, they could make out these words: + + _I'm not in the least in love with life; + I might be, p'raps, if I had a wife + To care for me in a wifely way, + Or a neighbour or two to say good-day, + Or a chum + To come + And give me the news in a friendly talk, + Or share a duet or a meal or a walk. + But all alone in the world am I, + And I sit in a cave, + And try to behave + As a good Flamp should, with philosophy. + I shan't last long, for the cave is damp, + And nothing's so bad for a Flamp + As cramp...._ + +'It's the Flamp!' said both children together, fearfully. + +The chanting began again, and Tilsa and Tobene jumped up and, following +the sound of the voice, came to a wide and heavily-trodden path between +two rocks. They plodded along it until, rounding a crag, they perceived +immediately before them a yawning cave. Although the singer was out of +sight, the noise made by him was now almost overwhelming and so dismal +that the children were on the point of joining in the lamentation +themselves. + +A few steps more brought them in sight of the melancholy songster. +Seated in a corner of the cave, with his massive head on his fore-paws, +the picture of dejection, was the most enormous creature they had ever +seen or dreamed about. He was rather like an elephant, but much more +immense and without a trunk: a huge, ungainly, slate-coloured animal. + +He did not hear them, but sat rocking to and fro in his corner, moaning +lugubriously. + +'Toby,' said Tilsa, who now was not in the least alarmed, 'can you +cough?' + +'I'll try,' said Toby, and he coughed. + +The Flamp took down one paw from its desert of face and peered out. Then +he sprang to his feet and rubbed his heavy, watery, blue eyes in blank +astonishment. Tilsa and Tobene did not move. They stood still, gazing +into the Flamp's great, mournful face, now wrinkled up with surprise and +excitement. + +Then the Flamp spoke--'What?' he said, 'kids? Real kids? Flesh-and-blood +kids? Human, rollicking, kind-hearted kids?' + +'We are real children,' Tilsa replied at length, 'if that is what you +mean, and, oh, we are so glad to have found you! The hedgehog's compass +told us to come this way, or we should never have reached you at all.' + +'Then you set out intending to find me?' said the Flamp. 'Well, that is +a good one. How is it you're not scared, like all the rest of them?' + +'I don't know,' said Tilsa. 'I can't think. But we weren't, were we, +Toby?' + +'No,' said Tobene. + +'And what made you come?' the Flamp asked. + +'We--we--' Tilsa faltered. 'Well, sir, we thought you wanted sympathy, +like Alison did. And so we came to--to try and give you some.' + +'And so I do,' the Flamp gasped out. 'And so I do,' and he lifted up his +right paw, and brushed it across his eyes. 'You see, it's precious +little of it I get. It's very hard, I can assure you, my dears, to be +the last of one's race. Why, the land was full of Flamps once, and a +fellow need never be in want of company, but now--now they're all dead, +all but me, and I'm not long for this life.' The Flamp sighed and +dropped a tear, which splashed heavily. + +Tilsa felt very sorry. 'Poor--' she began to say, but stopped abruptly. +She was intending to say 'Poor Flamp,' but that now seemed to her too +familiar; so she altered it to 'Poor gentleman!' although when the word +was out, it seemed equally unsuitable. + +Tobene said nothing aloud, but nudged Tilsa and whispered, 'Aren't you +going to try throwing your arms round him, Tilsa? It's time, isn't it?' + +'Hush!' said Tilsa severely. + +The Flamp went on: 'And I doubt if any one is keener on company than I +am. Over in the city yonder, you know, they have a season called +Christmas, when every one is supposed to be friends with every one else; +and I thought to myself, That's the time for me. I won't ask for much, I +thought, but if just one night in the year they'll look pleased to see +me, and say, 'How do?' why I'll be very grateful to them and a deal +happier during the months that follow. It wasn't much to ask, was it? +But I suppose I didn't go to work the right way, or perhaps I had two +legs too many. Anyway, they misunderstood me: thought I'd come to do +them harm or something, and tried shooting me and poisoning me and +barricading themselves in. Wouldn't even give me a moment's sight of a +kid's face. I didn't try any other night. It seemed to me that if at a +season of goodwill they would behave like that, my chances at an +ordinary time would be less than nothing. But men can't understand +animals. Children can, though they're apt to grow out of it. Thank +goodness, there's _some_ children that stay childlike to the end, +however old they may be.' He brushed his paw across his eyes again. + +Soon he went on: 'So I've had to live alone, with no company but my own +voice. Maybe you heard me singing as you came. It wasn't much of a song, +I admit, for elegance of rhyme and metre don't seem to come easy, but a +song like that is more comfort than you'd believe.' He paused again. + +Then he turned radiantly to his visitors. 'And you've trudged all the +way from the city just to be kind to me, have you? Well, that is good of +you! Bless your hearts, no one knows how much a deed like that means. +Why, it's as good as smush even to know that any one is thinking of you +kindly, let alone doing things. I haven't felt so cheery and comfortable +for years. But you must be hungry. Now tell me what you would like to +eat and I'll try and get it for you, and afterwards you must tell me all +about yourselves.' + +Tilsa looked at Tobene, and Tobene at Tilsa. + +Then Tobene spoke to the Flamp for the first time. 'You said just now +that something was as good as smush. Please, what is smush? because if +it's something to eat, I should like that.' + +The Flamp laughed all over: 'Splendid,' he cried, 'splendid! Something +to eat? I should rather think it is. You couldn't have made a better +choice. You shall have smush. Sit down here while I get it ready.' + +Tilsa and Tobene sat down, and the Flamp retreated farther into the +cave. There was a noise of pots and pans. + +'Isn't he a whopper?' said Tobene. + +'Tremendous,' said Tilsa. 'And what a dear old thing!' + +'Yes,' Tobene continued, 'and what a set of donkeys those people at Ule +have been all these years. Why, he's as jolly as Alison, in a different +way. Do you think he'll give us a ride, Tilsa?' + +'Of course he will,' said a deep voice above them. 'But you must eat +some smush first,' and looking up, they saw the Flamp on his hind legs, +towering into the roof of the cave, and in his paws a large dish and +some plates and spoons. 'Now then,' he said, 'eat as much as you can.' + +(All that the historian can do towards a description of smush is to say +that its colour is pink, and its taste quite indescribable but blessed +in the highest degree. When asked about it afterwards, Tilsa and Tobene, +even to their old age, would become purple and inarticulate with +enthusiasm. Perhaps if each of you thinks of all the most delicious +things you have ever eaten, you will come a little nearer to an idea of +what smush is like.) + +After they had finished, Tilsa told the Flamp all about herself, and +Tobene, and old Alison, and her grandfather the Liglid of Ule. + +'I expect,' she said, 'they are looking for us now. And I think, sir, if +you don't mind, it would be better if you were to go back with us, and +then we could let everybody see how kind and gentle you are, and +grandpapa won't go on trying to circumvent you.' + +'Circumvent?' said the Flamp. 'What's that?' + +'I don't know what it means,' said Tilsa, 'except that it's something +horrid. And someone named Bill's going to do it.' + +'All right,' said the Flamp, 'we will go back together, and the sooner +the better, I think, or that dear old Alison of yours will be nervous. +Although I should like to keep you here, you know. But you'll promise to +come again, won't you, and stay a long time?' + +'O yes,' cried Tilsa and Tobene together, 'we should just think we +will!' + + + + +IX + + +That night the two children slept soundly in a corner of the cave, while +the Flamp sat by and watched them. In the morning, after a breakfast of +smush, they climbed on the monster's back and started for the city at a +good swinging pace. + +'It was like riding on a cloud,' said Tobene afterwards: 'so high up.' + +They were well within sight of Ule when--'Look,' said Tobene suddenly, +pointing in the direction of a speck on the white road, 'what's that?' + +'It moves,' said Tilsa. 'It's a person.' + +'We'll soon see what it is,' the Flamp grunted, lengthening his stride. +The earth shook as his feet beat upon it. + +As they came nearer and nearer, the children saw that the object was a +woman. For a moment she stood upright, looking all ways at once as +though panic-stricken, and then she suddenly unfurled a green umbrella +and sank behind it. + +'Why, it's Alison,' cried Tobene. 'Hurrah!' + +'Stop, stop!' cried Tilsa to the Flamp. 'Please don't frighten dear old +Alison. Let us go down and run to her.' + +The Flamp at once stopped and lay on his side, and the children slipped +to the ground and scampered as fast as they could towards their nurse. +The umbrella did not move. As they drew close they heard the old lady's +voice in beseeching tones: 'Please, Mr. Flamp, they're the sweetest +children in the world, and if you've swallowed them, you mountaineous +wretch you, you may as well swallow me too, for all there's left for me +to live for! Besides, I'm their nurse, and I might be useful to them +down inside. Ooh! Ooh! Please, Mr. Flamp, they're the sweetest children +in the world, and if you've swallowed them, you mountaineous wretch you, +you----' + +'Alison, dear, it's all right,' Tilsa interrupted, skipping up and +pushing the umbrella aside. 'We're as safe and happy as ever we were.' + +Alison stared first at one and then at the other of her truant charges. +Then--'Well?' she almost screamed, 'is it really you, my dearies?' + +'Really!' exclaimed both children at once, and there was such hugging as +the plain of Ule had never before seen. + +Soon Alison furled her umbrella and pointed to the Flamp, who was +smiling and chuckling and soliloquising in the distance. + +('It's as good as smush to see this,' he was saying.) + +'Is that him?' Alison inquired. + +'Yes,' said Tilsa, 'and he's such a dear, you can't think.' + +'Yes, come along and be introduced,' said Tobene, and without a word +Alison went, being quite assured that if the creature had not harmed her +two pets it would not harm her. + +'Mr. Flamp,' said Tobene, 'I want to introduce you to this lady, our +nurse Alison. She's the best nurse in the world. You ought to get her to +tuck you up at night.' + +'Tuck _me_ up?' cried the Flamp, and--'Tuck _that_ up?' cried Alison, +both together, and they all laughed, and at once Alison was at home and +comfortable. + +They went forward to the city, chatting gaily, but when the wall was +reached, the gates were found to be barricaded. No sound of life was +audible, no moving thing to be seen. + +'As I expected,' said the Flamp sadly. 'They heard me coming, and as +usual have locked themselves in. What's to be done?' + +'The best course,' remarked old Alison, who was always a wonderful +manager, whether with the cold mutton or a child in a temper, 'the best +course is to wait. You lie down here, Mr. Flamp, and make as little +noise breathing as you can; and you, Tilsa, darling, take this pencil +and paper and write a note to your grandfather, to be slipped under the +gate. They'll venture out soon and find it.' + +The Flamp and Tilsa did as they were bid. This was Tilsa's note to the +Liglid:-- + + 'MY DEAR GRANDPAPA--There is no need to be frightened. Alison and + Toby and me are just outside the gates all safe with the Flamp, who + is really and truly the sweetest creature you ever saw. He doesn't + want to hurt this city at all, he only wants simpithy like I said + he did. If you open the gate and tell the people this you can see + for yourself how kind and gentle he is, and that there isn't any + need of sircumventing him. So please open the gate quickly. Your + affectionate grandchild, + + TILSA. + +The paper was folded and addressed to 'His Excellency the Liglid of +Ule,' and Tobene slipped it under the gate. Then the little party sat +down to wait. Old Alison took out her knitting, and as she worked, told +the others of her adventures in search of them. 'I had to come alone,' +she said: 'every one else was frightened.' + + + + +X + + +One hour passed, two hours, three hours, and then a flag of truce +appeared above the ramparts. + +'Here, Mr. Flamp,' said Alison, 'get up and wave this in reply'; and she +gave her handkerchief to the Flamp. + +He mounted slowly on his hind feet, and, stepping to the wall, waved the +handkerchief over it. A few minutes went by, and then the Liglid's +scared face appeared at a loophole. Seeing Tilsa, Tobene, and Alison +sitting comfortably in the shade cast by the Flamp's huge body, he +seemed to be reassured. + +'Alison,' he called out, 'are those really the children?' + +'No doubt of it, sir,' said Alison. + +'Then wait a little longer,' said the Liglid as he vanished. + +He went at once to the Council Chamber and summoned a meeting of the +wise men of Ule. 'Apparently,' he said, 'we have misjudged this creature +for many years; but our duty now is simple: to draw up as quickly as may +be an address of welcome to our eccentric visitor.' + +An hour later, a procession of the men of eminence of the city, followed +by the inhabitants, marched along the streets to the northern gate. At +the Liglid's word of command, the barricades were removed and the gate +flung open. + +Tilsa and Tobene at once ran to their grandfather and kissed him, while +Alison dropped a curtsey. The Flamp stood up and bowed as gracefully as +he could, and the Liglid returned the salute, not without some shaking +in the knees. + +In faltering tones, which afterwards grew more steady, he begged of the +Flamp the 'honour of his attention for a few moments,' and forthwith +read the address of welcome. It was flowery and extravagant in style, +and contained not a few statements which sent a spasm across the Flamp's +wide expanse of face, such as might be caused by an attempt to suppress +laughter. + +At the end, the Flamp bowed again and laid a massive paw upon his heart. +Then he replied. He began by thanking the Liglid for his kind welcome, +continued with the expression of his determination to do in the future +all that he could for the good of the city, and ended with a eulogy of +Tilsa and Tobene. + +'They are, if I may use the word,' he said feelingly, 'kids which any +city should be proud of. And to be the grandfather of such bricks ought +to be as good as smush and a perpetual delight. And their nurse, ma'am +Alison here, is an old lady as is worthy of them.' + +The crowd cheered these remarks again and again, and Tilsa and Tobene, +who were not accustomed to such publicity, hardly knew where to look. As +for old Alison, she curtseyed and went on with her knitting. 'Children,' +she said to herself, 'that travel in search of Flamps wear out their +stockings. Flattery or no flattery, new stockings must be made.' + +Other speeches followed, for Ule was famous for its oratory, the best +being from a young statesman who made the admirable suggestion that in +commemoration of this auspicious day, a new order of merit should be +established, called the Order of the Friends of the Flamp, membership to +be conferred upon all persons conspicuous for spontaneous acts of +kindness. Further, he proposed that the first persons to add the letters +F.F., signifying Friend of the Flamp, to their names, should be Tilsa, +Tobene, and old Alison. The project was received with the wildest +enthusiasm, and the order was then and there founded. And to the end of +the history of Ule, no honour was esteemed more highly by the citizens +than the simple affix F.F. + +The formal part of the proceedings being finished, the Liglid proclaimed +the day a general holiday and in the name of the city invited the Flamp +to a grand banquet. Afterwards came sports of all kinds on the plain, in +which the Flamp took part, carrying enormous loads of children up and +down at a hand gallop, until the Commissioner of Works begged him to +move more slowly, owing to the danger caused to the public buildings of +Ule by the tremor of the earth. Never in the memory of the oldest +inhabitant had such a day of jollification and excitement been spent. + +Of course the Flamp was the chief attraction, but Tilsa and Tobene and +old Alison were very considerable lions too, and a hundred times they +told the story of their adventures. Presuming on his relationship to the +explorers, the Liglid, it must be confessed, endeavoured to take to +himself some credit for the proceedings, but it is doubtful if he was +believed. + +One worthy deed, however, he did perform: he publicly burned the Bill +for the Circumvention of the Flamp, amid deafening applause. + +At last, late in the evening, the Flamp said good-bye, promising to come +again soon, and swung off across the plain, the people waving farewell +to him from the city wall. And as he moved along, he chanted to himself +a new song, which, although not much better in rhyme and metre, was +vastly more cheerful than his old dirge. This was the first line of it: + + '_O life, I think, is a jolly good thing._' + + + + +XI + + +There is no space to tell a thousandth part of the benefits conferred by +the Flamp upon the city which once had used him so ill. Suffice it to +say, that henceforward the Flamp became the guardian of Ule. + +A line of communication was set up between his cave and the city, and +when wanted he was signalled for; then at a rush he would cross the +plain, ready for any duty. + +He helped the people of Ule in countless ways, from overwhelming the +attacking force of the King of Unna, without the loss of a single man in +the defending army, to lying on the plain in the heat of summer and +casting a shadow in which picnic parties might have lunch. + +Sometimes the Flamp came when the signal had not been set in motion; and +then it was known that he was again in need of sympathy, and the +children of the city, headed by Tilsa and Tobene, would run out into the +plain to meet him and join in a game, or if it was at night, and he came +within the walls, the house-holders would join in the song of welcome +which the Poet Laureate of Ule had written for such occasions. And soon +the Flamp would return to the mountains happy again. + +The Christmas following the Understanding of the Flamp (as the +establishment of these new relations was called) was a time of good +fellowship, such as no Ulian had dreamed to be possible. Christmas at +last really was Christmas. The Flamp as of old came down at evening, but +this year no doors were barred, no blinds were drawn; instead he passed +from house to house throughout the city, looking in at the upper windows +and receiving a welcome at each, and sometimes a piece of plum-cake, +sometimes a packet of sweets, all of which passed down his huge red +throat. Is it necessary to say that his longest stay was at the nursery +window of the Liglid's house? + +In fact Tilsa and Tobene, as you may imagine, were always the Flamp's +favourites, and every summer it was they, and they alone, who were +honoured by an invitation to stay for a fortnight in the Blue Mountains, +where they had such a holiday as falls to the lot of few children. + +So did Ule, under the Flampian influence, become one of the happiest +spots in the world, and strangers poured into the city every day to +learn the secret of contentment. + + + + +The Ameliorator + + _TO "EVERSLEY" AND ALL WITHIN IT_ + + + + +I + +THE CITY OF BIRDS + + +Once upon a time there was a city where the good people were under the +protection of singing-birds of all kinds: nightingales, thrushes, +blackbirds, robins, chaffinches, linnets. As you passed through the +streets the song of one at least of these little fellows was certain to +strike pleasantly on the ear; for they would perch on the window-sills, +or in the branches of the trees before the houses, and fling out their +glad notes. + +No money could buy the birds. It mattered not how rich a man was, if he +were not merry at heart no bird's voice could be his to gladden the +hours with song. + +Fugitives fleeing across the wide plain at night would, once within the +gates of the city, pause a moment with raised finger, listening +breathlessly. Then the still air would be filled with beautiful, +consoling music, and 'Hark,' they would say, 'the nightingale! A good +man lives close by. Let us knock and ask protection.' And travellers +hearing a blackbird whistling gaily before a hostelry would know that +within doors was brave cheer and jocund company. + +Most of the children in the city had each a bird friend, and it was a +sad day when the wings spread and the songster flew away, for that meant +that in the heart of the child all was not well. Always, however, when +the smiles came back, back came also the little feathered companion. + + + + +II + +THE FOUR CHILDREN + + +Now this story is about four children in the city who were friends of +the birds: Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline. They were for the most +part good children, but now and again they made up their little minds +that they knew better than anybody else what was the best thing for +them; and as it generally happened that their elders refused to take the +same view, there came occasionally into their lives intervals of +unhappiness when the whole world was most plainly doing its best to +spoil their fun and treat them altogether badly. At least so it seemed +in the eyes of Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline. + +And to those who had the care of Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline, it +was apparent one Monday evening that such an interval was about to +begin. Bertram's governess had the greatest difficulty in persuading +that all-knowing boy that lessons were in the least desirable; Beryl's +mother having refused to buy her a new doll, and thus bring her store of +dolls from fifteen to sixteen, could induce Beryl to fall in with no +plans whatever; and the barometers of Bobus and Aline were unmistakably +at 'Set Sulks,' because they too wanted something which was not good for +them. Thus, one Monday evening, was it with Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and +Aline. + + + + +III + +THE NEW HOUSE + + +On the Tuesday morning that followed, the inhabitants of the City of +Birds, when they came downstairs and began the business of the day, were +astonished to find a new shop in the Market Square; astonished, because +no one could remember either what the house was like before, or who had +then lived in it, or indeed that there had been a house there at +all--not even the house-agent, who felt more than a little annoyed in +consequence, deeming himself defrauded of his just fees. + +There, however, stood the house, leaving no room for doubt as to its +existence. There it stood, spick and span, with white window-curtains +tied up with red ribbons, and rows of flower-pots on the sills, and a +shining brass handle and knocker on the door, and a dark blind in the +shop window through which, howsoever noses might be flattened against +the glass, nothing could be seen. Hanging out over the pavement was a +quaint sign-board bearing the words + + 'THE AMELIORATOR.' + +And, to crown all, in the branches of the silver birch before the house +a thrush was singing, while the swallows were already busy under the +gable. + + + + +IV + +THE BUSINESS CARD + + +At seven o'clock on the same morning, Bertram awoke. Had any observers +been present they would have seen him turn over in bed, push his fists +into the air and fight the sunshine which was streaming through the +window, and then open his eyes and begin to remember where he was. Then +they might have seen him yawn to a greater extent than so small a boy +would seem to be capable of. It was when Bertram's waking operations had +reached this stage that he remembered what had happened last night: he +had been naughty and had gone to bed early in consequence. But he wasn't +in the least sorry for it, not he, and his governess was a beast. These +were his sentiments as he began to dress. 'I shan't wash this morning,' +he said to himself, 'just to spite them.' + +It was just as he was turning to leave the room that Bertram caught +sight of something white on the floor underneath the window. Picking it +up, he saw that it was a card--a business card--which certainly was not +there last night. 'It must have blown in,' he thought, and forthwith +began to read it. This is what he read:-- + + THE AMELIORATOR + + begs to inform the Children of the City + of Birds that he has set up in Business + in their midst, and is ready (although not + eager) for their custom. + + SAD FACES BRIGHTENED WITH THE UTMOST DESPATCH. + TEARS DRIED. DISAPPOINTMENTS RELIEVED. + SORROWS TURNED TO PLEASURES. + BAD GOVERNESSES PUNISHED. + HARD LESSONS MADE EASY. + UNREASONABLE PARENTS BROUGHT TO THEIR SENSES. + TEMPER REPAIRING IN ALL ITS BRANCHES. + + _Business Hours_--When you wish. + + TERMS EASY. + + THE AMELIORATOR, + Market Square, + City of Birds. + +The words seemed to Bertram too good to be true, and he read them again +slowly. '"Sad faces brightened with the utmost despatch." "Tears dried." +That's for girls of course,' he remarked (but why he was so emphatic it +is difficult to say, since it was only last night that----but that's of +no importance). '"Bad governesses punished." Hooroo! "Hard lessons made +easy." Now this,' said Bertram, 'is the right kind of fellow, this +A-M-E-L-I-O-R-A-T-O-R, this Ameliorator!' and so saying, he pushed the +card into his pocket and looked out of the window to whistle +good-morning to his robin. But the bird was not there. His face fell +again. 'Pooh,' he said, 'they're all against me now, but I don't care,' +and as he walked downstairs to breakfast, he made up his mind to be +thoroughly fractious. + + + + +V + +THE CROSS-GRAINED MORNING + + +In the City of Birds there were several large green gardens set aside +for children. These gardens were the finest places in the world in which +to play hide-and-seek, because of the summer-houses and grottoes and +winding paths; also there were ponds to sail boats on, and trees to +climb, and caves for robbers, and a little circle of wet grass in the +midst of rhododendron bushes for fairies to plot and plan in; and for +very hot afternoons a soft bank where you could lie in the shade of a +cedar which seemed to bless the earth with its broad hands. + +Every morning after lessons the four children used to meet in one of +these gardens and play till dinner-time. Sometimes they would play +cricket until they were too tired to run another yard, and then lean +over the rim of the fountain and watch the goldfish gliding silently +through the water, or they would sail their boats on the pond, or join +in the marriage ceremonies of two of the blue ants that lived in the +bark of the cedar. There was always plenty of excitement at a blue ant's +wedding, on account of the bad behaviour of the company. The bridegroom +had a way of ignoring the solemnity of the occasion and trying to walk +to church with one of the bridesmaids, or even the bride's mother, while +sometimes the bride would forget all about her duties, and leave the +procession in order to pick up and stagger away with a ridiculous piece +of wood which she could not possibly really need. Very often the bride +had to be changed as often as six times before the church was reached, +where Bertram, who always insisted on being the clergy-man, was waiting +to perform the service. Ants, it must be confessed, are not good at +games: they are too busy, or, as Bertram put it, too selfish. Neither +are wood-lice. Just at important moments wood-lice turn sulky and roll +themselves into little balls. Worms are most trust-worthy, although +never eager for sensible play; but worms are slimy, and Beryl always +refused to touch them. Spiders, too, have a way of getting down one's +neck. Perhaps frogs are best of all. Frogs are quite satisfactory; they +always jump when you touch them up. Toads, on the other hand, are sulky; +but their eyes are good to look into. + +On this particular morning, Bertram and Beryl, Bobus and Aline met as +usual, but for some reason or other they found it impossible to have a +really good game; whatever they tried appeared flat and tiresome. They +began with cricket and were fairly successful until Bobus hit the ball +into the pond, where it immediately sank. Hitherto it always had +floated. Cricket, therefore, was over. Hide-and-seek took its place and +was going pretty well until Aline fell and hurt her knee. So no more +hide-and-seek. They tried the blue ants, and then the lizards that lived +under the leaves in the violet bed; but met with nothing but +unsociableness. The ants were quite nasty at being interfered with, and +one of them crawled up Beryl's arm. + +At last the children made up their minds to try no longer, and instead +they lay on their backs on the grass and grumbled. It was clear that the +world was against them, and what is the good of fighting in the face of +such opposition? Bertram began the grumbling. 'Old Tabby,' he +said,--that being the way in which he spoke of Miss Tabitha, his +governess,--'is a beast. She makes me learn heaps of things which nobody +can ever need to know.' + +'And I mayn't have a new doll,' said Beryl. + +'And I mayn't stay up later than eight,' said Bobus. + +'And I mayn't eat cake until I've had three pieces of horrid bread and +butter,' said Aline. + +'It's a shame,' said all. + +'Yes,' Bertram went on, 'and my robin wasn't singing this morning.' + +'No more was my linnet,' said Beryl. + +'No more was my chaffinch,' said Bobus. + +'And no more was my blackbird,' said Aline. + +'It's a shame,' said Bertram again; 'everything's against us. Except,' +he added, pulling the card from his pocket, 'except the +Amel--Amelior--except the Ameliorator.' + +'Why, have you got one too?' Aline asked, producing a card exactly like +it, and as she did so Beryl and Bobus also each showed one. On comparing +notes it seemed that all the cards had come in the night in the same +mysterious way. + +The four children looked at each other in silence. They all wanted to +say the same thing, but no one wished to be first. Bertram, as usual, +took the lead: 'Let's go and see the Am--what-d'ye-call-him,' he said. + + + + +VI + +THE LITTLE OLD MAN + + +A few minutes later the children stood hand in hand before the new shop +in the Market Square, and as they did so they suddenly discovered that +their wounded hearts were well again, just as you find that the tooth +stops aching at the moment you reach the dentist's doorstep. They might +even then have run home again, had not Bertram, feeling a little +doubtful of the cure and more than a little inquisitive, peeped into the +shop. + +'Come in, Bertram,' said a blithe voice, 'I've been expecting you all +the morning'; and before he and his companions knew where they were the +door was shut, the four children were inside it, each in a comfortable +chair, and in front of them was absolutely the pleasantest little old +man they had ever seen. + +He had a smooth, ruddy face, and white hair, and large round spectacles +behind which his eyes danced and sparkled, and a comical kindly mouth, +and his clothes were of bright colours that merged into each other as +easily as those of the rainbow and were as certain a sign that the sun +was shining somewhere. Moreover there was in his appearance a vague but +unmistakable likeness to the one person of all persons whom Bertram +loved best, and to the one whom Beryl loved best, and to the one whom +little Aline loved best, and to the one whom Bobus loved best. Yes, it +was very strange, but although all these people were totally different +there was something about the little old man that bore resemblance to +each of them. + + + + +VII + +THE STOCK IN TRADE + + +When the children summoned up enough courage to look round, they saw +that the shop was stocked with drawers and bottles and had quite a +business-like appearance. One bottle was labelled 'Mixture for Sulks,' +and another, 'Bad Temper Lotion.' Then there were 'Cross-patch Powders' +and 'Pills against Meddling.' In a prominent place Beryl saw two tall +flasks, one almost full of water and the other almost empty, and the +water in the one that was nearly full was thick and muddy, but that in +the second was clear as crystal. The flask that was nearly full was +lettered 'Tears Shed for Ourselves,' and the other, 'Tears Shed for +Others.' But also there were pleasanter things than these: there were +cupboards full of sweets, shelves of picture books and fairy stories, +and a great store of toys. Also there were many drawers, labelled +encouragingly, 'Rewards for Good Humour,' 'Prizes for Hard Work,' +'Prizes for Hard Play,' 'Presents for Anticipating Wishes,' 'Gifts for +Forgetting Number One,' and so on. + +It took only a short time to see these things, and meanwhile the little +old man was standing in front of the fire, beaming merrily. Then, when +all four had taken a good look, and were feeling rather bad in +consequence, for they could not feel entitled to much beyond pills and +powders, he led them into the inner room--his consulting-room he called +it--saying, 'Come along, little sorrowful ones, and we will inquire into +the great trouble.' And at once they had some difficulty in remembering +their grievance at all, although an hour ago it had seemed to fill the +whole landscape. + + + + +VIII + +THE ADVICE + + +'Now,' said the Ameliorator, when they were all comfortably inside the +inner room, 'I want to tell you about some of my friends. "Ladies first" +is a good rule: let me tell you about a little girl I once knew,'--here +he laid his hand on Beryl's head--'who had just such soft hair as this, +and just such a gloomy little face.' Here Beryl smiled, in spite of +herself. 'Yes,' added the Ameliorator, 'and just such a smile now and +then. And what do you think the trouble was? Why, although she had no +fewer than fifteen dolls, all given to her by thoughtful friends, she +wanted a new one. These fifteen dolls were very good ones, especially +the faithful old Arthur John, a wooden gentleman of strong affections +and no nose worth mentioning, yet nothing would do but she must have an +aristocratic pink wax lady in white muslin, that hung in a certain shop +window and stared hard all day at the little ragamuffins who pressed +their faces against the pane and said, "O my, ain't she a beauty!" Why +the little girl wanted her I could never understand, because she had no +expression at all, and my young friend had a brother who had declared +that if any more "sappy wax dummies" were brought into the house, he +would put them to bed in the oven. Still, in spite of this terrible +threat, she did want her, and in her despair she came to me about it. + +'Well,' added the Ameliorator, 'what do you think I did? I made her sit +down by this very table, and I opened this very drawer, and I took out +these very pictures, and as I showed them to her' (here he began to lay +before the bewildered Beryl picture after picture of ragged street +children) 'I told her how these little wretches were forced to run about +all day in the gutters, whether it was wet or fine, cold or warm, +because they had no nurseries, and how they could get very little to +eat, and how the only toys they had were bits of wood and old bottles. +And then and there I made so bold as to suggest to my discontented +friend--who of course had every reason to be unhappy, when her mother, +who already had given her so many nice things, refused to buy her an +expensive doll--that if she were not only to stop wishing for any more +new toys, but were to send a few of those she already had to be given +away to some of these children who had none, why I fancied she would not +be altogether miserable any longer. That is what I told her to do, and +that is what she did, and I believe I may truthfully say it was a +wonderful cure. + +'Then--let me see--yes,' the Ameliorator continued more briskly, 'then +there was a boy, or--shall I say, a little man?--who once consulted me. +The difficulty, if I remember rightly, was intellectual. O yes!--he was +convinced that he, being a wise patriarch of eight or nine, knew more +than the lady engaged by his parents to teach him. So he applied to her +a not very respectful nickname and refused to learn the lessons that she +set him, and swaggered about calling her a beast, which is not the right +attitude of a gentleman (although old enough to know everything) towards +a lady, and made himself as unpleasant as he could. + +'By some chance, one of my cards fell into his hands: he read it and was +fascinated by the words, "Bad governesses punished." He came to me to +arrange for the punishment. The best way, I told him, is shocks. There +is nothing like a shock to bring a governess to her senses. "Now, what +is the last thing in the world your governess expects from you?" I +asked. "Why, that you will learn a lesson of your own accord, without +constant jogs from her." So that if he were to do this, I told him, he +would give her a severe shock, and thus punish her. + +'He went away delighted with the plan. Morning after morning he appeared +in the schoolroom with his task all prepared, and every morning the +governess received a new shock. And when I peeped through the window not +long after, there they sat, close together, she happy after her +punishment, and he happy because (only he didn't know this) he had made +her so. For she was unhappy before--very; but young fellows with exalted +ideas on their own judgment and knowledge have no time to observe the +unhappiness of their governesses or parents, have they, Bertram?' + +Bertram did not answer: this shock system of punishment was new to him. +He felt muddled, but he began to think he would try it. He was not, +however, quite in a condition to see the Ameliorator clearly. + +'And little Bobus doesn't like going to bed?' the Ameliorator asked, +turning to Bobus. 'My dear sir, it can be made the best thing in the +world. Let me tell you how to make it so. Directly you get into bed, +begin to think what pleasant little surprise you can give some one on +the next day: any one, mother or father, cousin or playmate, nurse or +beggar in the street. You will find this such an exciting game that you +will run to bed eagerly when the time comes, and, what is more, it makes +you readier to get up. At any rate, Bobus, try it. + +'And little Aline,' the Ameliorator went on, taking Aline's hand and +beaming down upon her with his kindly eyes, which danced more than ever +behind his round spectacles, 'little Aline prefers cake to bread and +butter! Dear, dear, this is very sad. If she eats three pieces of bread +and butter she may have cake, but not till then. Well, I think I should +advise her to eat those three pieces. Little girls who eat only cake +grow up to be weedy and weak, and unable to do half the good things of +life: they can't skate, and they can't dance, and they can't play games. +So I should advise Aline to eat the bread and butter.' + + + + +IX + +THE TOKENS + + +'Now,' said the little old man, 'you must run home or you'll be late for +dinner. But first let me find some little token of our conversation for +each,' and so saying, he went to the drawer labelled 'Prizes for Hard +Work,' and found something for Bertram; and to the drawer labelled +'Gifts for Forgetting Number One,' and found something for Beryl; and to +the drawer labelled 'Presents for Anticipating Wishes,' and found +something for Bobus; and to the drawer labelled 'Rewards for Hard Play,' +and found something for Aline. + +'Now, good-bye,' said he, holding open the door. + +But Bertram, who was always the leader, did not move. He seemed still to +have something on his mind. + +'No, no,' said the Ameliorator, who was a wonderful thought-reader, 'no, +no, there is nothing to pay. Why, I have had the pleasure of your +company for a whole hour! That's payment enough for any one. Now run +along.' + +'But,' Bertram faltered, still not moving, 'I haven't earned the "Prize +for Hard Work."' + +'No,' said each of the others, 'I haven't earned mine either.' + +'Ah!' said the Ameliorator, 'but you are going to.' + + + + +X + +THE RETURN + + +Hand in hand, silently, the four children walked through the city. And +when each one reached home, there, in the branches of the tree before +the house, was its bird in full song. + + + + +The Schoolboy's Apprentice + + _TO L. F. G._ + + +Once upon a time there was a schoolboy called Chimp. Chimp was not his +name: his name was Alexander Joseph Chemmle. Chimp was short for +chimpanzee, an animal which his schoolfellows agreed that he was like. + +Chimp usually spent his holidays in his uncle's family; but one summer +he travelled on a visit to his father, who was British Consul in a +foreign port, so far away that the boy had only a few days at home +before it was time again to join the steamer for England. + +Chimp, who was always adventurous, had been at sea for only a week on +the return journey, when one evening at dusk he lost his hold as he was +clambering out to the end of the main crosstrees, and fell overboard. +The other passengers were listening to a concert in the saloon +('screeching' Chimp had called it, when he took refuge in the chief +engineer's room), and, work being over, the crew were for'ard smoking, +so that there was no one except the first officer and the man at the +wheel to hear the shout that Chimp sent up from the water. As a matter +of fact both men heard it, but it caused them to do no more than say to +themselves at the same moment, 'There's that boy again! Up to some +mischief, I'll be bound.' No help, therefore, came to Chimp. The great +black ship glided by, the screw threshed the water into blinding foam, +and when he could see and think again, Chimp was alone in the ocean. + +Chimp was a good swimmer. He struck out at once vigorously in the +direction of the island which they had passed at sundown. The sea was as +smooth as a pond and quite warm, and after several minutes had passed, +the boy turned over on his back and floated comfortably, moving his arms +just enough to give him an impetus towards the shore. Although he was +upset by the accident which had so suddenly substituted the water for +the ship (and it was nearing supper time, and there were always ices for +supper!), Chimp was not a boy at all given to fear, and he could think +of his new plight with composure. His first calm thought was regret for +the mongoose which he was taking back to school, 'although,' as he said +to himself, 'the chances are, Porker wouldn't let me keep it,' Porker +being the way in which Chimp spoke of Dr. Cyril Bigley Plowden, +Principal of Witherson College. His second feeling was keenness to play +Robinson Crusoe in earnest. Chimp and other boys had often on +half-holidays made believe that an island in the river was Juan +Fernandez, but the game usually began with one fight to decide who +should be Robinson, and ended with another to check the arrogance of +Friday. Now, however, he was but an hour or so from an uninhabited +island (of course it was uninhabited) and bothered by no rival for chief +honours. He decided that to fall into the sea from a steamer at night +was a lark. But a little while afterwards he thought of sharks and +remembered, with something of a pang, good times in England; then he +wondered what would happen on the ship when they missed him; then he +glowed at the anticipation of the other boys' envy when they learned +where he had been; then he thought of sharks again; and then his feet +touched the bottom. + +When Chimp at last crawled out of the water, he was nigh dead beat. In +the soft still light which the moon poured down he could see beyond the +beach a dark strip which seemed to promise a bed. He staggered blindly +over the stones to this refuge, found that it was grass, and, sinking +upon it, was in a moment asleep. + +The sun was high and hot when Chimp awoke. For a moment he looked around +him bewildered, wondering why the dream would not finish: then he +remembered everything. At the same moment he was conscious, as he +afterwards expressed it, that he had had nothing to eat for a hundred +years. Chimp stood up, yawned the stiffness out of his bones, and set +forth to seek for food and claim his kingdom. He made at once for the +highest ground and gathered the island in a bird's-eye view. It seemed +to be about eight miles long and three broad, mainly rock, bare and red +as a brick. There were a few trees and some wide patches of rank grass. +Not a sign of human life was to be seen, but swift green lizards shot +across the ground at Chimp's feet, a million grasshoppers shrilled into +his ears, and white gulls with cruel eyes hovered and wheeled above him. +The prospect did not cheer Robinson Crusoe II., but he set out for the +interior of the island, searching every miniature valley for a spring, +every tree and shrub for fruit. But he sought in vain. Then recollecting +stories of the toothsomeness of turtles' eggs baked in the sand, Chimp +turned to the shore again and explored the coast. At the end of three +hours he said disgustedly, 'What a liar Ballantyne was!' and was just +sinking down exhausted, when his heart gave a big _plump!_ and stood +still, for there before him was a well-trodden path. + +At first, hungry as he was, Chimp's feeling was grief at the discovery +that after all the island was not uninhabited, but his regret soon faded +before the anticipation of the meal he would devour in the abode to +which the pathway led, and he struck into it with new vigour, taking the +inland direction. The path rose with every step. At last, a mile or so +from the sea, it turned abruptly round a boulder, and Chimp suddenly +found himself in the presence of an elderly man with a long grey beard, +who was sitting at a table in the entrance of a cave, writing. + +The meeting seemed to be the most unexpected thing that had ever +happened to either of them, for the elderly man rose with a start that +upset both ink and table, and Chimp caught himself looking round for +something to cling to for support. Not finding anything, he sat down on +the ground and stared at the elderly man. He would have liked to have +gone forward to pick up the ink-bottle, but dared not, on account of a +peculiar feeling in his knees. Meanwhile the elderly man stared at the +boy, and Chimp wondered if he ever would speak, and if it would be in +English when he did. After a long pause the elderly man picked up the +ink. Then looking at Chimp still more curiously through his spectacles, +he spoke. + +'What are you?' he asked, in good English. + +'My name,' said Chimp, 'is Alexander Joseph Chemmle.' + +'No, no,' the elderly man replied, 'I mean, what are you--what? Not a +boy, are you? Not really and truly a boy! Oh say, say you are a boy!' + +'Yes,' said Chimp, although for the moment, so intense and unreasonable +was the other's excitement about the matter, he almost doubted it. 'Yes, +I'm a boy.' + +'A boy! a boy!' the elderly man exclaimed joyfully. 'Eureka!' Then he +grew calmer, and continued: 'Dear me, this is very interesting. A most +fortunate chance! A boy, you say. How extremely happy an accident. Now +what kind of boy might you be?' + +Chimp was puzzled. 'I suppose,' he thought, 'I ought to call myself a +good boy, and yet that isn't exactly how Porker would describe me. And +what is more, good boys are such saps.' Then he spoke aloud: 'Well, sir, +I'm a fairish specimen of a boy, I think.' + +'Good!' said the elderly man. 'Good! An average boy. So much the better. +And what does it feel like to be a boy?' + +'Whew!' said Chimp to himself, 'I came for breakfast, and all I seem to +be getting is an exam.' However, he did his best to answer the question. +'Why, sir,' he said aloud, 'as long as you don't get too many lines and +swishings, it feels good to be a boy. But swishing makes it feel bad +sometimes.' + +'Lines?' inquired the other. 'Swishings? What are they?' + +'Why,' said Chimp, 'when Porker canes you, that's swishing, and lines +are passages from Virgil which you have to copy out if you make +howlers--I mean, if you make mistakes.' + +'Yes, yes,' said the elderly man, a little vaguely. 'And so it's good to +be a boy?' he added. + +A happy thought struck Chimp. 'It is good,' he replied; 'but there are +other times when it's bad, besides those I mentioned. When--when you're +hungry, for instance.' + +'Ah!' exclaimed the elderly man, rising from the table. 'I was +forgetting. You must pardon me, Alexander Joseph Chemmle. I have, I +fear, nothing to offer you but biscuits and tinned meats. Do you care +for tinned meats? I keep most kinds.' + +'I like bloater paste,' Chimp said. 'I always take a pot or two back to +school.' + +'Ah!' cried his host eagerly, 'you like bloater paste best? That's +famous! So do I. A community of taste!' + +He disappeared into the cave, and in a minute or so came forth again, +bearing the bloater paste and a plate in one hand, and the biscuits and +a knife in the other. 'Now,' he said, 'fall to, and while you are eating +these I must try to find something else. Tinned pears--do you like +them?' + +Chimp mumbled that he did. He was eating with more enjoyment than he +ever had eaten in his life. Ambrosia was nothing to bloater paste. + +'It is wonderful--our tastes coincide in everything,' said the elderly +man as he entered the cave again. He returned with a tin of pears and +some marmalade, a jug of water and a glass. Then he sat on a camp stool +and observed his guest. + +It was not until Chimp was well forward with the pears that his host +spoke again. 'I am sorry, Alexander Joseph Chemmle,' he said, 'to have +kept you waiting so long, for I take it that this is not your customary +appetite--that you were, in fact, unusually, if not painfully, hungry. +But I was so interested by the sight of a real boy that I could think of +nothing else. You see, I have never met with a boy before.' + +Chimp opened his eyes as wide almost as his mouth. 'But,' he began in +his astonishment, 'they are as common as dirt, boys are. There's heaps +of them--loads.' + +'True,' the other made answer, 'true. But when one abandons the world, +and, embracing the profession of the eremite, devotes one's life to +solitude and reflection, one is deprived of the pleasure of intercourse +with so attractive a personality as that of the average boy.' + +'Ye-es,' dubiously from Chimp. 'But,' he added, 'you were a boy yourself +once.' + +'No,' the Hermit made reply. 'Never.' + +'Never a boy!' Chimp exclaimed. 'Well, that beats everything.' + +'Never,' repeated the recluse. 'You see,' he remarked in explanation, 'I +was articled by my parents to a hermit at a very tender age--to the +learned man, in fact, who preceded me in the tenancy of this modest +cell. We plunged immediately into the fascinating study of metaphysics, +and the period of boyhood slipped by unnoticed.' + +Chimp whistled,--he had no words adequate to the occasion. + +'For many years,' the Hermit continued, 'I did not feel the loss of this +experience, being deeply engrossed in other subjects; but now, in the +fall of life, I find myself regretting it keenly. Much as I love my +studies, much as I am attached to the solitary life, I sometimes think +it a finer thing to have been a boy even than to have been a hermit.' + +Chimp thought it would be kind of him to say something cheery, yet could +hit upon nothing but, 'Oh no, not at all,' just as if the Hermit had +apologised for treading on his toe; yet it seemed to please the old man. + +'However,' he broke off, 'this is by the way. Come, Alexander Joseph +Chemmle, tell me about your adventures; how did you find your way to +this island? How is it you are alone? Tell me everything.' + +Chimp, wincing a little at the appalling formality of the Hermit's mode +of address, began. By the time his story was finished it was evening, +for the Hermit asked numberless questions which sent Chimp off on +numberless side tracks of narrative. At the end of the recital the +bloater paste was produced again, and Chimp again ate heartily. + +'Now,' said the Hermit, 'I will show you something of the island.' + +So saying, he took his staff and they set forth. First they visited the +spring whence the Hermit brought water, and then climbing to a peak of +rock, the Hermit described the island as it lay beneath them. + +'There,' said he finally, indicating the little creek to which the +footpath led, 'that is where the boat lands that once a year brings me +my provisions. It puts off from my Aunt Amelia's yacht--_The Tattooed +Quaker_. My Aunt Amelia is the only relative that remains to me. It is +she who supplies the tinned meats and the pears. She really has +admirable taste, although her choice in names may be a little fantastic. +In addition to the provisions, it is my aunt's custom to send a letter +beseeching me to return in the yacht to England, and declaring that if I +do not, that particular supply of food will be the last. For forty years +she has done this. She is a noble woman, my Aunt Amelia.' + +'When is the boat due?' Chimp asked, thinking more of its possible +effect upon himself than upon the Hermit. + +'Soon, soon,' the old man replied, with something very like a sigh. 'In +a fortnight's time, in fact.' + +'What a pity!' said Chimp. 'And I say, sir,' he added, 'how decent to be +you. Only there ought to be some niggers.' + +The Hermit sighed. They walked back without speaking, and not ten +minutes had passed before Chimp was sound asleep in a corner of the +cave, while the Hermit lay gazing at the stars. + +On awaking, Chimp found that the cave was empty. For a moment he thought +himself still dreaming, but the table laid for breakfast recalled him to +facts, and he fell to thinking of the Hermit. 'Rum old beggar!' he +mused. 'A screw loose somewhere, I guess.' When the Hermit returned, it +was plain that the old man had something on his mind, as the saying is. +He spoke not at all at breakfast, except, when laying the table, to +remark that potted ham and chicken make a pleasing variety upon bloater +paste. But after breakfast, placing one seat in the shade for Chimp and +one for himself, he talked. + +'I have been thinking deeply, Alexander Joseph Chemmle,' he began. +'During the night I have reviewed my life, and now more than ever I am +conscious of the limiting influence exerted upon a philosopher by the +loss of boyhood. The suspicion has been with me for years: it is now a +certainty. You are not likely, my young friend, to be with me long, for +_The Tattooed Quaker_ will, of course, carry you back to England next +week. But in the intervening time I want you, so far as is within your +power, to make a boy of me. I put myself unreservedly in your hands. +Consider me your apprentice. Will you do this?' The Hermit watched +Chimp's face anxiously. + +Chimp was staggered completely. A screw loose, he had thought; but +surely it was the height of madness for a man to wish to be a boy again. +Chimp and his companions spent a large part of their time in wishing to +be men: the other side was not to be believed. But he pulled himself +together with the thought that to humour this old lunatic might be +funny, and would last only a week. After all, to find a cracked man on +the island was better than to find no man at all, now that Ballantyne +had been proved to be so wrong. And just then the boy caught a glimpse +of the Hermit's anxious eager eyes. 'All right,' he said quickly, 'I'm +game. But it'll be rather difficult, you know.' + +'Difficult!' exclaimed the Hermit, with an expression of mingled pain +and alarm. 'How? Not seriously, I trust?' + +'Oh no!' said Chimp; 'but you're rather old, you see, and boys are not +in the habit of wearing beards three feet long; although,' he added +encouragingly, noting the look of disappointment on the Hermit's face, +'I don't see why they shouldn't. Why, there was a fellow at our school +who had whiskers before he was fourteen, and we shaved them too. Tied +him down and cut off one side one day and the other the next. After that +he bought a razor.' + +'Is--is that action typical of the boy?' the Hermit asked. + +'Well, they get up to larks now and then,' Chimp admitted. + +'As time is short,' said the Hermit, 'I am disposed to begin this +morning--at once. That is not too soon for you, I hope, Alexander Joseph +Ch----?' + +'Oh, please don't,' Chimp interrupted. 'You know, boys don't call each +other by all their names like that; they either stick to the last one or +invent a nickname.' + +'I am sorry to have hurt your feelings,' said the Hermit. 'If you will +tell me your nickname I will call you by it.' + +'I think,' replied Chimp, unwilling to explain his own, 'that perhaps +we'd better begin now and give each other fresh ones.' + +'Very well,' said the Hermit, after a minute's thought, 'I shall call +you Simian, or, for the sake of brevity, Sim.' + +'Simeon?' cried Chimp. 'Oh, that's not the thing at all! A nickname +should describe a fellow, you know--it shouldn't be just another +ordinary name.' + +'Yes,' replied his apprentice, 'and I mean to call you Sim, an +abbreviation of Simian. And what will you call me?' + +Chimp pondered awhile. 'I shall call you,' he said at length, +'Billykins, because of your long goat's beard.' + +And thus began the Hermit's apprenticeship. + +'It is too hot for footer,' said Chimp, after he had collected his +thoughts, 'so we will make a start with a little cricket practice. +Cricket,' he explained, 'is a game--the best game in the world. You +ought to see W. G. and Ranji. But of course you don't know who they are. +Oh dear, oh dear, what you are missing out here! W. G., that's W. G. +Grace, the champion of the world. Your beard, Billykins, must have been +rather like his a few years ago. And Ranji, that's Ranjitsinhji.' + +'Yes, yes,' the Hermit remarked feebly, depressed by the weight of his +stupendous ignorance. + +Chimp went on with fine authority. 'Now, while I am cramming this sock +with stuff to make a ball, you be sharpening these sticks for wickets. +You've got a knife, I suppose?' + +The Hermit admitted that he had not. + +'What!' cried Chimp; 'no knife? Why, you'll never be a boy without a +knife. Let me look at your pockets?' + +The Hermit had but one pocket, and a handkerchief was all it held. + +'Awfully clean,' was Chimp's contemptuous comment. 'And nothing else? +Oh, this will never do! Look at mine now,' and turning out his pockets, +he displayed a double-bladed knife containing several implements, +including a corkscrew and an attachment for extracting stones from +horses' feet, a piece of string, a watch spring, twenty or thirty shot, +a button, a magnet, a cog-wheel, a pencil, a match-box, a case of +foreign stamps all stuck together with salt water, a whistle, a +halfpenny with a hole in it, and a soaked and swollen cigar which the +Captain had given him. + +'Are all these things quite necessary?' the Hermit asked humbly. + +'No,' said Chimp, 'not quite all. The knife is, and the string is, and a +fellow likes his smoke, you know. Collecting stamps is rather decent, +but you needn't unless you want to. There's butterflies and birds' eggs, +if you like. The other things are useful: the more you have the better +for you.' + +'String,' said the Hermit, 'I possess--but no pocket-knife. But if you +permit it, I will carry my table-knife in future. 'Tis a simple weapon, +I know: but on the other hand you see that on this island the +opportunities of extracting stones from horses' hoofs are rare.' + +'I suppose it must do,' said Chimp doubtfully. 'But you must add a few +other things, or we shan't have anything to swap. Boys are great at +swapping, you know.' + +'Swapping?' the Hermit asked. + +'Yes: when you want one thing, giving another for it. For instance, if +you had a white rat' (the Hermit shuddered) 'and I gave you a brass +cannon for it, that would be a swap.' + +'Very well,' the Hermit replied seriously, 'I will add a few things; +but, if you don't mind, not rats of any colour, nor in fact any live +stock.' + +'Just as you like,' said the magnanimous Chimp. 'You wouldn't do for +Billy Lincolne though: he usually carries half a dozen frogs in his +trousers' pockets.' + +When the cricket gear was complete, Chimp stepped out twenty-two yards +and pitched the stumps. 'You go in first,' he said. + +The Hermit seized the bat. + +'Now all you have to do at first,' Chimp continued, 'is to keep the ball +out of the wicket. Hit it any way you like, and hold your bat straight.' + +The Hermit obeyed to the letter. To Chimp's intense astonishment he +punished the bowling all round, pulling off balls to square leg in a +shameless fashion. + +Chimp was kept busy, and at last he grew almost vexed. 'Well, you mayn't +have much science,' he cried, as, nearly out of breath, he flung himself +down after some miles of running, 'but you've got a gorgeous eye. Why, +you hit everything. You've played before, haven't you?' he added +suspiciously. + +The Hermit smiled again. 'A little,' he admitted. 'Yes, my late +instructor, the sage to whom I was confided by my parents many, many +years ago, he and I occasionally had a game together. It was our only +recreation. I thought it hardly worth while to mention it, expecting +that all skill had left me.' + +'By jingo! though, it hasn't,' Chimp exclaimed. 'You're a regular W. G. +in your way. But, I say, another time you know how to do a thing you +might let a fellow know first.' + +'This is too silly,' was Chimp's persistent thought during the next few +days, but he kept up the game of make-believe like a hero. As a matter +of fact, it was sound amusement to explore the island and plunge on +sudden impulses into a score of high-spirited enterprises, although the +presence of the old man panting at his side touched him rather sadly now +and then. The Hermit, however, endured stolidly and pluckily, and +neither of them ever let the time appear to drag. + +Chimp and his apprentice bathed together, and hunted for anemones among +the rocks; they gave chase to butterflies and lizards; they told +stories; they even pretended to be Robinson Crusoe and Friday, the part +of Friday falling to the Hermit. + +'You see, Billykins,' Chimp said, 'you are better suited to the part: +you can make such a whacking footprint.' + +'I think I am progressing well, Simian,' remarked Chimp's apprentice at +breakfast one morning, 'although I must admit that many impulses and +movements that come naturally to you are acquired by me with difficulty. +Last evening's attempt at leap-frog, for example, has left me so stiff +that I can hardly move, and I assure you that it has never before +occurred to me to climb that tree all the years I have known it. Perhaps +in a week or so, when my hands are healed, I may try again. But I can +see, Sim, that it must be very good to be a boy--very, very good.' + +'Why yes, Billykins,' Chimp broke in, 'but you don't know really +anything about it yet. And I'm afraid you can't know on this island. +There isn't the company and there isn't the means. I can't even make you +an apple-pie bed, when you sleep in a single blanket; and a booby-trap +needs a door. And when there are only two people, and no one else to +laugh, it's no fun to stick a cactus in a fellow's chair. Tuck, too! +What do you know about tuck? What can you know about tuck when there's +no shop for chocolate and Turkish Delight and things like that? Tinned +stuff is all very well, but it gets jolly tedious. And birds'-nesting, +and ratting, and setting night lines, and dodging game-keepers, and +breaking into orchards! You haven't even elastic to make a catty with, +or so simple a contrivance as a fish-hook. Still we might rig up a bow +and arrow.' + +'But,' the Hermit objected, 'there is nothing to shoot.' + +'Oh yes!' said Chimp, 'sea-gulls.' + +'We can't eat sea-gulls,' his apprentice replied. Then anxiously, 'Boys +don't eat sea-gulls, do they?' + +'Why, no, Billykins; but that isn't the thing. Bringing them down is the +thing. It's sport.' + +That evening after tea, Chimp approached his apprentice with a troubled +expression. + +'I think I ought to tell you, Billykins,' he goaded himself to say, +'that some boys fall in love. Not all, mind. I never did it myself--I +think it's footle--but lots and lots do. I suppose you'd like to try it, +you're so thorough; though I don't see how you're going to manage +exactly.' + +'You mean,' said the Hermit, 'on an island so poor in opportunities? +Yes, it would be difficult. Still, give me the outline.' + +'Well, Billykins, it isn't very clear,' said Chimp. 'I believe though, +that the fellow feels sort of jolly inside while it's going on. But it +never lasts long.' + +'And it's not compulsory?' the Hermit asked in some trepidation. + +'Oh no, Billy, not at all.' + +'Then we will dismiss love along with sport,' was the Hermit's decision. + +Thus, in games and rambles and conversation, the time passed by, until +it was the evening before the day that would bring _The Tattooed +Quaker_, and Chimp and his apprentice were sitting before the cave, +watching the sinking sun. + +'Well,' said the Hermit, 'only a few more hours, Sim, and you will be on +the way home again. Then I must to work once more. My great work on Man +and his place in Society, scientifically considered, awaits me. But I +shall miss you, Sim,' the old man added; 'you have been a very pleasant +chapter in my life. Don't forget me altogether, will you; and you'll pay +my Aunt Amelia a visit, won't you, and tell her about me?' + +Chimp had a little difficulty in replying. He felt girlish, that is to +say, gulpy and tearful. At last, 'Why don't you come back too?' he +asked. + +'I?' said the Hermit. 'Oh no, there is no place for Hermits in your +country.' + +'I don't know about that,' said Chimp, speaking more naturally again. +'You might make a lot of money showing yourself in caravans at fairs. +People would go miles to see a hermit. I paid a penny once to see a fat +woman, and there was no end of a squash in the tent. You must come. I'll +take you to my uncle's, where I live in the vacs. and Jim--that's my +cousin--Jim and me'll give you a ripping time.' + +The Hermit smiled sadly. 'No, no,' he said. After a short silence he +spoke again. 'Tell me, Sim--I ask merely out of curiosity--are boys +always contented with their surroundings?' + +'Not by a long chalk,' Chimp answered. 'They're always running away.' + +'Ah!' said the Hermit. 'How often have you run away?' + +'Well, not at all, so far,' said Chimp, 'although Goring minor and I did +get all ready to bunk once, only Mother Porker copped us on the landing. +But we meant it, I can tell you. We were going to walk to Portsmouth, +sleeping under hay ricks, and hide ourselves as stowaways on board a +man-of-war, and show up when we got to sea, and do something heroic to +please the Captain, and after that win loads of prize-money and come +back covered with glory. Boys often do that in books. But old Mother +Porker copped us on the landing.' + +'Bed-time,' said the Hermit. + +When they rose the next morning, there, in the offing, heading straight +for the island, was _The Tattooed Quaker_. They hurried to the peak, and +the Hermit waved his handkerchief. The signal was seen on deck, and an +answering flag scurried up to the mast-head. After breakfast Chimp and +his apprentice walked down to the creek to welcome the yacht's boat. + +The Captain looked at Chimp in amazement. 'What, Master Augustus!' he +said when he had shaken hands with the Hermit and delivered Aunt +Amelia's letter, 'what! have you got a pupil, then?' + +'No,' replied the Hermit, 'he's not my pupil, he's your passenger'; and +so saying, he introduced Chimp, and then stood aside to see what his +aunt had to say; while the crew waited for the Captain's orders to move +the stores from the boat to the cave. + +When the Hermit had finished reading, he returned the letter to its +envelope and slipped it into his pocket. + +'Well, Master Augustus, are you coming back with us?' said the Captain, +exactly as he had asked the question for the past forty years. + +The Hermit laughed in negative reply, exactly as he had laughed once a +year for the past forty years. + +'Now then, my men, be quick,' said the Captain. + +In the boat was a large hamper in which to convey the stores over the +rocks to the cave. Two of the sailors held it at each end, and the +Hermit accompanied them, while Chimp and the Captain strolled away +together. Three times the hamper was borne from the boat to the cell. +There then remained only a dozen or so of parcels, which the men might +easily carry in their hands. This time the Hermit did not accompany +them. + +When the last of the stores were safely within the cave the boatswain +blew his whistle as a signal that all was ready, and Chimp and the +Captain of _The Tattooed Quaker_ hurried back to the creek. + +'Where is Master Augustus?' the Captain inquired. 'The young gentleman +wants to say good-bye to him.' + +'He must be in the cave,' said Chimp. 'I'll run and see.' + +But the cave was empty. Chimp climbed the rock before the entrance and +called, 'Bi-i-illykins, Bi-i-illykins!' No answer. 'I must have missed +him on his way back to the creek,' he thought, and hurried to the shore +again. + +'Be quick!' cried the Captain. 'Time's up!' + +'But I can't find him,' Chimp called, floundering from boulder to +boulder. + +'Can't find him?' echoed the Captain. 'That's very rum. I suppose he +wants to avoid the pain of parting. Come along; we can't stay any longer +now.' + +So with a heavy heart Chimp took his place in the boat and watched how +with every stroke of the oars the distance widened between himself and +the island. + +'Weigh the anchor!' cried the Captain, the moment they were on board. + +_The Tattooed Quaker_ was a superb yacht, and in the ardour of +exploration Chimp forgot the Hermit and everything else. He examined the +cabin and the berths, he made friends with the steward, he descended +into the lazarette, where peering into the refrigerator, he found half a +game pie, and forthwith devoured it. He conversed learnedly with the +engineers about the size of the cylinders; he decided which hammock +would best minister to his own comfort; he overhauled the Captain's +stock of books, and by the time these duties were accomplished _The +Tattooed Quaker_ was well out to sea, and the island was only a thin +line on the horizon. And then a feeling of sadness for the loss of poor +old Billykins, left there all alone again, took hold of the boy, and he +retired dismally to his hammock to mope. + +After dinner, however, at which meal he revived marvellously, he was in +gay enough spirits to tell the story of the Hermit's apprenticeship. The +Captain was in ecstasies. 'What a yarn for the old lady!' he remarked +again and again. 'What a yarn!' + +Suddenly, as they sat in the darkling cabin, there appeared in the +doorway a figure which seemed in the gloom to resemble an elderly man +with a long grey beard. + +'Mercy! What's that?' the Captain shouted, leaping from his chair and +drawing back. 'Who are you? What do you want?' + +The figure took a step into the room. 'Simian,' it said, 'don't you +recognise me?' + +'Why, it's Billykins!' cried Chimp, running forward and seizing the +Hermit's hand. + +'Great Heavens! Master Augustus!' exclaimed the Captain. 'Where did you +spring from?' + +'From the hamper!' said the Hermit. + +Chimp and the Captain stared at each other for a moment, and +then--'What!' roared the Captain, 'a stowaway! Well, you're something +like an apprentice, you are!' And he smote the table till the ship +trembled, and laughed like the north wind. + +The Hermit waited patiently till the storm abated, while Chimp gazed at +him in wonderment and admiration. + +Then, in the lulls of the Captain's merriment, he explained. 'You see,' +he said, 'this boy has changed me considerably. I see things with new +eyes. And when I was standing there by the boat, the desire to run away +and be for ever quit of the island and solitude came strongly upon me.' + +'Oh, what a model apprentice!' the Captain exclaimed. + +'So,' continued the Hermit, a little abashed, 'well--so I crawled into +the hamper.' + +'Hooray!' cried Chimp; it's splendid. But aren't you hungry?' + +'Hungry?' said the Captain, 'I should think he is. Steward!' he called, +'bring some supper for Master Augustus.' + +The steward came running into the cabin and stood transfixed--all eyes. +His appearance set the Captain off again; 'Don't be scared,' he said; +'he's alive, right enough.' + +'I didn't see the gentleman come aboard,' the steward found words to +say. + +'No,' said the Captain, 'no more didn't I. No more didn't no one. Master +Augustus has his own way of coming aboard.' + +At this the Hermit laughed too, and the spell being broken, the steward +brought supper as to a man of flesh and blood. + +'So I'm a runaway, Sim,' the Hermit said cheerily when he had finished; +'and there was no Mother Porker to catch me on the landing.' + +'Catch you? No! You're A1 at it!' Chimp replied. + +'Yes,' resumed the Hermit, stretching his limbs, 'we're going to be +comrades again. But when we're in England, mind, no fairs, Sim, no +caravans.' + +Chimp laughed. + +'And we'll go and see Ranji,' said the Hermit. + +THE END + + + + +The Dumpy Books for Children. + +Selected by E. V. LUCAS. + +I. THE FLAMP, THE AMELIORATOR, AND THE SCHOOLBOY'S APPRENTICE, _by E. V. +LUCAS_ + +II. MRS. TURNER'S CAUTIONARY STORIES + +III. THE BAD FAMILY, _by Mrs. Fenwick_ + +IV. LITTLE BLACK SAMBO, _by Helen Bannerman_. With Pictures in colours +by the Author + +V. THE BOUNTIFUL LADY, _by Thomas Cobb_ + +VI. A CAT BOOK, Portraits _by H. Officer Smith_, Characteristics _by E. +V. LUCAS_ + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Flamp, The Ameliorator, and The +Schoolboy's Apprentice, by E. V. Lucas + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE FLAMP *** + +***** This file should be named 30445.txt or 30445.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/3/0/4/4/30445/ + +Produced by David Edwards, Mary Meehan and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This +file was produced from images generously made available +by The Internet Archive) + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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