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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Political Application, by John Victor Peterson
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Political Application
+
+Author: John Victor Peterson
+
+Release Date: March 24, 2010 [EBook #31755]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK POLITICAL APPLICATION ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Greg Weeks, Barbara Tozier and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+ This etext was produced from Fantastic Universe, September
+ 1956. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the
+ U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.
+
+
+
+
+ _John Victor Peterson lives in Jackson Heights, almost a
+ stone's throw from La Guardia Airfield. But he doesn't just
+ stand and watch the big planes roar past overhead. He has the
+ kind of brilliant technical know-how which makes what goes on
+ inside of a plane of paramount interest to him. He's
+ interested, too, in the future superduper gadgetry, as this
+ hilarious yarn attests._
+
+
+
+
+POLITICAL APPLICATION
+
+_by ... John Victor Peterson_
+
+
+ If matter transference really works--neanderthalers can pop up
+ anywhere. And that's very hard on politicians!
+
+
+Some say scientists should keep their noses out of politics. Benson
+says it's to prevent damage to their olfactory senses. Benson's a
+physicist.
+
+I've known Allan Benson for a long time. In fact I've bodyguarded him
+for years and think I understand him better than he does himself. And
+when he shook security at White Sands, my boss didn't hesitate to tell
+me that knowing Benson as I do I certainly shouldn't have let him skip
+off. Or crisp words to that effect.
+
+The pressure was on. Benson was seeking a new fuel--or a way of
+compressing a known fuel--to carry a torchship to Mars. His loss could
+mean a delay of decades. We knew he'd been close, but not _how_ close.
+
+My nickname's Monk. I've fought it, certainly, but what can you do
+when a well-wishing mother names you after a wealthy uncle and your
+birth certificate says Neander Thalberg? As early as high school some
+bright pundit noted the name's similarity to that of a certain
+prehistoric man. Unfortunately the similarity is not in name alone:
+I'm muscular, stooped, and, I must admit, not handsome hero model
+material.
+
+Well, maybe the nickname's justified, but still, Al Benson didn't have
+to give the crowning insult. And yet, if he hadn't, there probably
+wouldn't be a torchship stern-ending on Mars just about now.
+
+C. I. (Central Intelligence, that is) at the Sands figured Benson
+would head for New York. Which is why the boss sent me here. I
+registered in a hotel in the 50's and, figuring that whatever Benson
+intended to do would have spectacular results, I kept the stereo on
+News.
+
+Benson's wife hadn't yielded much info. Sure she described the clothes
+he was wearing and said he'd taken nothing else except an artist's
+case. What was in that was anybody's guess; his private lab is such a
+jumble nobody could tell what, if anything, was missing.
+
+C. I. knew his political feelings. Seems he'd been talking wild about
+the upcoming presidential election and had sworn he'd nip the
+draft-Cadigan movement in the bud. Cadigan's Mayor of New York City.
+He's anti-space. In fact, Cadigan's anti just about everything in
+science except intercontinental missiles. Strictly for defense, of
+course. Cadigan says.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+A weathercaster was making rash promises on the stereo when the potray
+dinged. The potray? I certainly wasn't expecting mail. Only C. I. knew
+where I was and they'd have closed-circuited me on visio if they
+wanted contact.
+
+The potray dinged and there was a package in it.
+
+Now matter transference I knew. It put mailmen out of business.
+There's a potray in every domicile and you can put things in it, dial
+the destination and they come out there. They come out the same size
+and weight and in the same condition as they went in, provided they
+didn't go in alive. Life loses, as many a shade of a hopeful guinea
+pig could relate.
+
+So the potray dinged and here was this package. At first glance it
+looked like one of those cereal samples manufacturers have been
+everlastingly sending through since postal rates dropped after cost of
+the potrays had been amortized. But cereal samples don't come through
+at midday; they're night traffic stuff.
+
+The package was light, its wrapping curiously smooth. There was an
+envelope attached with my correct name and potray number. Whoever had
+mailed it must be in C. I. or must know someone in C. I. who knew
+where I was.
+
+The postmark was blurred but I could make out that it had been cast
+from Grand Central. Time didn't matter. It couldn't have been cast
+more than a microsecond earlier.
+
+The envelope contained a card upon which was typed:
+
+"Caution! Site on cylinder of 2 ft. radius and 6 ft. height. Unwrap at
+armslength."
+
+Now what? A practical joke? If so, it must be Benson's work. He's
+played plenty, from pumping hydrogen sulphide (that's rotten egg gas,
+as you know) into the air-conditioning system at high school to
+calling a gynecologist to the launching stage at the Sands to sever an
+umbilical cord which he neglected to say was on a Viking rocket.
+
+I followed the instructions. As I bent back the first fold of the
+strange wrapping it came alive, unfolding itself with incredible
+swiftness.
+
+Something burst forth like a freed djinn--almost instantaneously
+lengthening, spreading--a thing with beetling brows, low, broad
+forehead, prognathous jaw, and a hunched, brutally muscular body, with
+a great club over its swollen shoulder.
+
+I went precipitously backward over a coffee table.
+
+It stabilized, a dead mockery, replica of a Neanderthal.
+
+A placard hung on its chest. I read this:
+
+"Even some of the early huntsmen weren't successful. Abandon the
+chase, Monk. I've things to do and this--your blood brother, no
+doubt--couldn't catch me any more than you can!"
+
+Which positively infuriated me.
+
+Do you blame me?
+
+A few cussing, cussed minutes later I realized what Al Benson had
+apparently done: solved the torchship's fuel problem.
+
+Oh, I'd seen Klein bottles and Mobius strips and other things that
+twist in on themselves and into other dimensions, twisting into
+microcosms and macrocosms--into elsewhere, in any event. And here I
+had visual evidence that Benson had had something nearly six feet tall
+and certainly two feet in breadth enclosed in a nearly weightless
+carton less than eight inches on the side!
+
+Sufficient fuel for a Marstrip? Just wrap it up!
+
+The stereo's audio was saying: "... from the Museum of Natural
+History. Curators are compiling a list of the missing exhibits which
+we will reveal to you on this channel as soon as it's available. Now
+we switch to Dick Joy at City Hall with news of the latest exhibit
+found. Come in, Dick!"
+
+On the steps of City Hall was a full size replica of a mastodon over
+whose massive back was draped a banner bearing the slogan: "The
+Universal Party is for you! Don't return to prehistory with Cadigan!
+Re-elect President Ollie James and go to the stars!"
+
+And there was a closeup of Mayor Cadigan standing pompous and
+wrathful--and looking very diminutive--behind the emblem of his
+opposition party.
+
+Dick Joy was saying, "Eyewitnesses claim that this replica--obviously
+one of the items stolen from the Museum of Natural History--suddenly
+materialized here. Immediately prior to the alleged materialization a
+man--whose photograph we show now--ostensibly bent down to tie a
+shoelace, setting a shoebox beside him. He left the box, walking off
+into the gathering crowd, and this mastodon _seemed_ to spring into
+being where the shoebox had been.
+
+"The mastodon replica has been examined. A report just handed me says
+it is definitely that from the Museum and that it could not
+conceivably have been contained in a shoebox. It's obviously a case of
+mass hypnotism. The replica must have been trucked here. There's no
+other possible explanation. Excuse me!"
+
+Dick Joy turned away, then back.
+
+"I have just been handed a notice that Mayor Cadigan wishes to say a
+few words and I hereby introduce him, His Honor the Mayor, Joseph F.
+Cadigan!"
+
+His balding, fragmentarily curly-haired Honor glared.
+
+"Friends," he said chokingly, "whatever madman is responsible for this
+outrageous act will not go unpunished. I call upon the City's Finest
+to track him down and bring him to justice.
+
+"I am for justice, for equality and peace. I--"
+
+His Honor was apparently determined to use all the time he could.
+Being a newscast, it was for free.
+
+I killed the stereo. And the visio rang. It was Phil Pollini, the C.
+I. Chief.
+
+"Monk," he said, "guess you've seen the stereo. Al's out to fix the
+Mayor's wagon."
+
+"Say that again," I said, having a brainstorm.
+
+"Now, look--" he started.
+
+"Maybe you've got something there, Chief," I cut in. "Cadigan's got
+the superduper of all wagons--a seven passenger luxury limousine with
+bulletproof glass, stereo, a bar, venetian blinds and heaven knows
+what else. Hot and cold running androids, maybe. He prowls the
+elevated highways with an 'In Conference' sign flashing over the
+windshield. So's he can't be wire-tapped or miked, I guess. It'd be a
+natch for Al Benson to go for."
+
+Pollini grinned.
+
+"So if you were Benson what'd you do to fix the Mayor's wagon?"
+
+"Hitch it to a star," I said, "and the closest spot to a star would be
+the observation platform of the Greater Empire State."
+
+"You're probably right," the Chief said. "Get going!"
+
+I got.
+
+Ten minutes later I walked out onto the observation platform on the
+150th floor of the Greater Empire State Building--and found an
+incredulous crowd gathered around the mayor's limousine. I felt good.
+I'd predicted.
+
+I asked a guard, "How'd it get here?"
+
+His eyebrows were threatening a back somersault.
+
+"Don't know," he said. "I was looking over the side; then turned
+around and here it was! You have any ideas?"
+
+Which is when I spotted Al Benson.
+
+I settled for shoving Benson toward the elevator, being careful since
+he had a box under each arm. We made the elevator and went down and it
+stopped on the 120th floor and the operator said, "Change here for all
+lower floors and the street--"
+
+As we waited on the 120th for the down elevator, the P. A. system
+barked:
+
+"Attention all building occupants. By order of the Mayor no one will
+be permitted to leave the building until further notice. Please remain
+where you are. We will try not to inconvenience you for any great
+time."
+
+There was no one close to us.
+
+"Al," I said, "look, stinker, you've had your fun but this is it. I
+don't know what you've got in those boxes but you've got to turn them
+over--and yourself--to the next copper who shows. This is a civil
+matter, strictly local, and not C. I."
+
+Benson grinned. "Got to make a delivery first, Monk. Look, there's a
+potray over there. Can I use it?"
+
+His grin was infectious. "So what are you going to send where?" I
+asked as sternly as I could.
+
+"The Mayor's personal files," he said. "I managed to carry them out of
+City Hall--once they'd been suitably wrapped, of course! I'm sending
+them to the Senate Investigation Committee. Don't worry, Monk, His
+Honor won't be President this or any year!"
+
+I helped him dial the SIC number.
+
+"What about the other package?" I asked him then.
+
+"Insurance," he said. "Come out on the setback."
+
+He placed the last package on the mosaic tile of the terrace, untied
+its string, flipped open the edge of the Benson wrapping and jumped
+back.
+
+It was an NYC police helicopter.
+
+We potrayed it back from the Sands. Suitably wrapped, of course.
+
+That was a month ago. Most of it never came out in the papers. Nothing
+of Benson's invention. C. I. thought it should be squelched, at least
+until Benson and the boys get back from Mars.
+
+Which would be the end except for the packages. Yes, Benson left a
+gross of them with me and I've been mailing them one a day to the
+leaders of the opposition party. I don't truly know what's in them, of
+course. But it's very curious that the day before the torchship left
+exactly one hundred and forty-four cylinders of hydrogen sulphide were
+missing from quartermaster stores. Coincidentally one of my C. I.
+friends tells me Benson had him rig up a gross of automatic releases
+for gas cylinders.
+
+Adding it up, it could be a good lesson for politicians to keep their
+noses out of science.
+
+
+
+
+
+End of Project Gutenberg's Political Application, by John Victor Peterson
+
+*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK POLITICAL APPLICATION ***
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