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+<?xml version="1.0" encoding="iso-8859-1"?>
+
+<!DOCTYPE html
+ PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN"
+ "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd" >
+
+<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml">
+ <head>
+ <title>
+ Roughing It, Complete
+ </title>
+ <style type="text/css" xml:space="preserve">
+
+ body {background:#faebd7; margin:5%; text-align:justify}
+ P { text-indent: 2em;
+ margin-top: .25em;
+ margin-bottom: .25em; }
+ H1,H2,H3,H4,H5,H6 { text-align: center; }
+ HR { width: 33%; text-align: center; }
+ blockquote {font-size: 90%; font-style: italic; margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%;}
+ div.fig { display:block; margin:0 auto; text-align:center; }
+ .figleft {float: left;}
+ .figright {float: right;}
+ .toc { margin-left: 15%; margin-bottom: 0em;}
+ .boxnote {background-color: #DDE; color: #000; padding: .5em; margin: 1em 10%; }
+ CENTER { padding: 10px;}
+
+</style>
+ </head>
+ <body>
+ <h2>
+ ROUGHING IT, COMPLETE, By Mark Twain
+ </h2>
+<pre xml:space="preserve">
+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Roughing It, by Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens)
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.net
+
+
+Title: Roughing It
+
+Author: Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens)
+
+Release Date: August 18, 2006 [EBook #3177]
+Last Updated: October 18, 2012
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ROUGHING IT ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by David Widger
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="boxnote">
+ <i> <a
+ href="http://www.gutenberg.org/files/3177/old/orig3177-h/main.htm"> LINK
+ TO THE ORIGINAL HTML FILE: This Ebook Has Been Reformatted For Better
+ Appearance In Mobile Viewers Such As Kindles And Others. The Original
+ Format, Which The Editor Believes Has A More Attractive Appearance For
+ Laptops And Other Computers, May Be Viewed By Clicking On This Box.</a>
+ </i>
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="cover.jpg (90K)" src="images/cover.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /><br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="spine.jpg (54K)" src="images/spine.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /><br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h1>
+ ROUGHING IT
+ </h1>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ By Mark Twain
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /><br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="frontispiece1.jpg (168K)" src="images/frontispiece1.jpg"
+ width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /><br /><br /> <a name="linkfrontispiece2" id="linkfrontispiece2"></a>
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="frontispiece2.jpg (184K)" src="images/frontispiece2.jpg"
+ width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /><br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="titlepage.jpg (95K)" src="images/titlepage.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /><br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="dedication.jpg (18K)" src="images/dedication.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /><br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ PREFATORY.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This book is merely a personal narrative, and not a pretentious history or
+ a philosophical dissertation. It is a record of several years of
+ variegated vagabondizing, and its object is rather to help the resting
+ reader while away an idle hour than afflict him with metaphysics, or goad
+ him with science. Still, there is information in the volume; information
+ concerning an interesting episode in the history of the Far West, about
+ which no books have been written by persons who were on the ground in
+ person, and saw the happenings of the time with their own eyes. I allude
+ to the rise, growth and culmination of the silver-mining fever in Nevada&mdash;a
+ curious episode, in some respects; the only one, of its peculiar kind,
+ that has occurred in the land; and the only one, indeed, that is likely to
+ occur in it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Yes, take it all around, there is quite a good deal of information in the
+ book. I regret this very much; but really it could not be helped:
+ information appears to stew out of me naturally, like the precious ottar
+ of roses out of the otter. Sometimes it has seemed to me that I would give
+ worlds if I could retain my facts; but it cannot be. The more I calk up
+ the sources, and the tighter I get, the more I leak wisdom. Therefore, I
+ can only claim indulgence at the hands of the reader, not justification.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ THE AUTHOR.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /><br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CONTENTS.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br /> <a href="#linkch01">CHAPTER I.</a> My Brother appointed Secretary of
+ Nevada&mdash;I Envy His Prospective Adventures&mdash;Am Appointed Private
+ Secretary Under Him&mdash;My Contentment Complete&mdash;Packed in One Hour&mdash;Dreams
+ and Visions&mdash;On the Missouri River&mdash;A Bully Boat<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch02">CHAPTER II.</a> Arrive at St. Joseph&mdash;Only
+ Twenty-five Pounds Baggage Allowed&mdash;Farewell to Kid Gloves and Dress
+ Coats&mdash;Armed to the Teeth&mdash;The "Allen"&mdash;A Cheerful Weapon&mdash;Persuaded
+ to Buy a Mule&mdash;Schedule of Luxuries&mdash;We Leave the "States"&mdash;"Our
+ Coach"&mdash;Mails for the Indians&mdash;Between a Wink and an Earthquake&mdash;A
+ Modern Sphynx and How She Entertained Us&mdash;A Sociable Heifer<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch03">CHAPTER III.</a> "The Thoroughbrace is Broke"&mdash;Mails
+ Delivered Properly&mdash;Sleeping Under Difficulties&mdash;A Jackass
+ Rabbit Meditating, and on Business&mdash;A Modern Gulliver&mdash;Sage-brush&mdash;Overcoats
+ as an Article of Diet&mdash;Sad Fate of a Camel&mdash;Warning to
+ Experimenters<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch04">CHAPTER IV.</a> Making Our Bed&mdash;Assaults
+ by the Unabridged&mdash;At a Station&mdash;Our Driver a Great and Shining
+ Dignitary&mdash;Strange Place for a Frontyard&mdash;Accommodations&mdash;Double
+ Portraits&mdash;An Heirloom&mdash;Our Worthy Landlord&mdash;"Fixings and
+ Things"&mdash;An Exile&mdash;Slumgullion&mdash;A Well Furnished Table&mdash;The
+ Landlord Astonished&mdash;Table Etiquette&mdash;Wild Mexican Mules&mdash;Stage-coaching
+ and Railroading<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch05">CHAPTER V.</a> New
+ Acquaintances&mdash;The Cayote&mdash;A Dog's Experiences&mdash;A Disgusted
+ Dog&mdash;The Relatives of the Cayote&mdash;Meals Taken Away from Home<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch06">CHAPTER VI.</a> The Division Superintendent&mdash;The
+ Conductor&mdash;The Driver&mdash;One Hundred and Fifty Miles' Drive
+ Without Sleep&mdash;Teaching a Subordinate&mdash;Our Old Friend Jack and a
+ Pilgrim&mdash;Ben Holliday Compared to Moses<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch07">CHAPTER
+ VII.</a> Overland City&mdash;Crossing the Platte&mdash;Bemis's Buffalo
+ Hunt&mdash;Assault by a Buffalo&mdash;Bemis's Horse Goes Crazy&mdash;An
+ Impromptu Circus&mdash;A New Departure&mdash;Bemis Finds Refuge in a Tree&mdash;Escapes
+ Finally by a Wonderful Method<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch08">CHAPTER VIII.</a>
+ The Pony Express&mdash;Fifty Miles Without Stopping&mdash;"Here he Comes"&mdash;Alkali
+ Water&mdash;Riding an Avalanche&mdash;Indian Massacre<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch09">CHAPTER IX.</a> Among the Indians&mdash;An Unfair
+ Advantage&mdash;Laying on our Arms&mdash;A Midnight Murder&mdash;Wrath of
+ Outlaws&mdash;A Dangerous, yet Valuable Citizen<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch10">CHAPTER X.</a> History of Slade&mdash;A Proposed
+ Fist-fight&mdash;Encounter with Jules&mdash;Paradise of Outlaws&mdash;Slade
+ as Superintendent&mdash;As Executioner&mdash;A Doomed Whisky Seller&mdash;A
+ Prisoner&mdash;A Wife's Bravery&mdash;An Ancient Enemy Captured&mdash;Enjoying
+ a Luxury&mdash;Hob-nobbing with Slade&mdash;Too Polite&mdash;A Happy
+ Escape<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch11">CHAPTER XI</a>. Slade in Montana&mdash;"On
+ a Spree"&mdash;In Court&mdash;Attack on a Judge&mdash;Arrest by the
+ Vigilantes&mdash;Turn out of the Miners&mdash;Execution of Slade&mdash;Lamentations
+ of His Wife&mdash;Was Slade a Coward?<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch12">CHAPTER
+ XII.</a> A Mormon Emigrant Train&mdash;The Heart of the Rocky Mountains&mdash;Pure
+ Saleratus&mdash;A Natural Ice-House&mdash;An Entire Inhabitant&mdash;In
+ Sight of "Eternal Snow"&mdash;The South Pass&mdash;The Parting Streams&mdash;An
+ Unreliable Letter Carrier&mdash;Meeting of Old Friends&mdash;A Spoiled
+ Watermelon&mdash;Down the Mountain- -A Scene of Desolation&mdash;Lost in
+ the Dark&mdash;Unnecessary Advice&mdash;U.S. Troops and Indians&mdash;Sublime
+ Spectacle&mdash;Another Delusion Dispelled&mdash;Among the Angels<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch13">CHAPTER XIII.</a> Mormons and Gentiles&mdash;Exhilarating
+ Drink, and its Effect on Bemis&mdash;Salt Lake City&mdash;A Great Contrast&mdash;A
+ Mormon Vagrant&mdash;Talk with a Saint&mdash;A Visit to the "King"&mdash;A
+ Happy Simile<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch14">CHAPTER XIV.</a> Mormon
+ Contractors&mdash;How Mr. Street Astonished Them&mdash;The Case Before
+ Brigham Young, and How he Disposed of it&mdash;Polygamy Viewed from a New
+ Position<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch15">CHAPTER XV.</a> A Gentile Den&mdash;Polygamy
+ Discussed&mdash;Favorite Wife and D. 4&mdash;Hennery for Retired Wives&mdash;Children
+ Need Marking&mdash;Cost of a Gift to No. 6&mdash;A Penny- whistle Gift and
+ its Effects&mdash;Fathering the Foundlings&mdash;It Resembled Him&mdash;The
+ Family Bedstead<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch16">CHAPTER XVI.</a> The Mormon
+ Bible&mdash;Proofs of its Divinity&mdash;Plagiarism of its Authors&mdash;Story
+ of Nephi&mdash;Wonderful Battle&mdash;Kilkenny Cats Outdone<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch17">CHAPTER XVII.</a> Three Sides to all Questions&mdash;Everything
+ "A Quarter"&mdash;Shriveled Up&mdash;Emigrants and White Shirts at a
+ Discount&mdash;"Forty-Niners"&mdash;Above Par&mdash;Real Happiness<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch18">CHAPTER XVIII.</a> Alkali Desert&mdash;Romance of
+ Crossing Dispelled&mdash;Alkali Dust&mdash;Effect on the Mules&mdash;Universal
+ Thanksgiving<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch19">CHAPTER XIX.</a> The Digger
+ Indians Compared with the Bushmen of Africa&mdash;Food, Life and
+ Characteristics&mdash;Cowardly Attack on a Stage Coach&mdash;A Brave
+ Driver&mdash;The Noble Red Man<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch20">CHAPTER XX.</a>
+ The Great American Desert&mdash;Forty Miles on Bones&mdash;Lakes Without
+ Outlets&mdash;Greely's Remarkable Ride&mdash;Hank Monk, the Renowned
+ Driver&mdash;Fatal Effects of "Corking" a Story&mdash;Bald-Headed Anecdote<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch21">CHAPTER XXI.</a> Alkali Dust&mdash;Desolation and
+ Contemplation&mdash;Carson City&mdash;Our Journey Ended&mdash;We are
+ Introduced to Several Citizens&mdash;A Strange Rebuke&mdash;A Washoe
+ Zephyr at Play&mdash;Its Office Hours&mdash;Governor's Palace&mdash;Government
+ Offices&mdash;Our French Landlady Bridget O'Flannigan&mdash;Shadow Secrets&mdash;Cause
+ for a Disturbance at Once&mdash;The Irish Brigade&mdash;Mrs. O'Flannigan's
+ Boarders&mdash;The Surveying Expedition&mdash;Escape of the Tarantulas<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch22">CHAPTER XXII.</a> The Son of a Nabob&mdash;Start for
+ Lake Tahoe&mdash;Splendor of the Views&mdash;Trip on the Lake&mdash;Camping
+ Out&mdash;Reinvigorating Climate&mdash;Clearing a Tract of Land&mdash;Securing
+ a Title&mdash;Outhouse and Fences<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch23">CHAPTER
+ XXIII.</a> A Happy Life&mdash;Lake Tahoe and its Moods&mdash;Transparency
+ of the Waters&mdash;A Catastrophe&mdash;Fire! Fire!&mdash;A Magnificent
+ Spectacle&mdash;Homeless Again&mdash;We take to the Lake&mdash;A Storm&mdash;Return
+ to Carson<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch24">CHAPTER XXIV.</a> Resolve to Buy a
+ Horse&mdash;Horsemanship in Carson&mdash;A Temptation&mdash;Advice Given
+ Me Freely&mdash;I Buy the Mexican Plug&mdash;My First Ride&mdash;A Good
+ Bucker&mdash;I Loan the Plug&mdash;Experience of Borrowers&mdash;Attempts
+ to Sell&mdash;Expense of the Experiment&mdash;A Stranger Taken In<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch25">CHAPTER XXV.</a> The Mormons in Nevada&mdash;How to
+ Persuade a Loan from Them&mdash;Early History of the Territory&mdash;Silver
+ Mines Discovered&mdash;The New Territorial Government&mdash;A Foreign One
+ and a Poor One&mdash;Its Funny Struggles for Existence&mdash;No Credit, no
+ Cash&mdash;Old Abe Currey Sustains it and its Officers&mdash;Instructions
+ and Vouchers&mdash;An Indian's Endorsement&mdash;Toll-Gates<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch26">CHAPTER XXVI.</a> The Silver Fever&mdash;State of the
+ Market&mdash;Silver Bricks&mdash;Tales Told&mdash;Off for the Humboldt
+ Mines<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch27">CHAPTER XXVII.</a> Our manner of going&mdash;Incidents
+ of the Trip&mdash;A Warm but Too Familiar a Bedfellow&mdash;Mr. Ballou
+ Objects&mdash;Sunshine amid Clouds&mdash;Safely Arrived<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch28">CHAPTER XXVIII.</a> Arrive at the Mountains&mdash;Building
+ Our Cabin&mdash;My First Prospecting Tour&mdash;My First Gold Mine&mdash;Pockets
+ Filled With Treasures&mdash;Filtering the News to My Companions&mdash;The
+ Bubble Pricked&mdash;All Not Gold That Glitters<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch29">CHAPTER XXIX.</a> Out Prospecting&mdash;A Silver Mine At
+ Last&mdash;Making a Fortune With Sledge and Drill&mdash;A Hard Road to
+ Travel&mdash;We Own in Claims&mdash;A Rocky Country<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch30">CHAPTER XXX.</a> Disinterested Friends&mdash;How "Feet"
+ Were Sold&mdash;We Quit Tunnelling&mdash;A Trip to Esmeralda&mdash;My
+ Companions&mdash;An Indian Prophesy&mdash;A Flood&mdash;Our Quarters
+ During It<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch31">CHAPTER XXXI.</a> The Guests at
+ "Honey Lake Smith's"&mdash;"Bully Old Arkansas"&mdash;"Our Landlord"-
+ -Determined to Fight&mdash;The Landlord's Wife&mdash;The Bully Conquered
+ by Her&mdash;Another Start&mdash;Crossing the Carson&mdash;A Narrow Escape&mdash;Following
+ Our Own Track&mdash;A New Guide&mdash;Lost in the Snow<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch32">CHAPTER XXXII.</a> Desperate Situation&mdash;Attempts to
+ Make a Fire&mdash;Our Horses leave us&mdash;We Find Matches&mdash;One,
+ Two, Three and the Last&mdash;No Fire&mdash;Death Seems Inevitable&mdash;We
+ Mourn Over Our Evil Lives&mdash;Discarded Vices&mdash;We Forgive Each
+ Other&mdash;An Affectionate Farewell&mdash;The Sleep of Oblivion<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch33">CHAPTER XXXIII.</a> Return of Consciousness&mdash;Ridiculous
+ Developments&mdash;A Station House&mdash;Bitter Feelings&mdash;Fruits of
+ Repentance&mdash;Resurrected Vices<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch34">CHAPTER
+ XXXIV.</a> About Carson&mdash;General Buncombe&mdash;Hyde vs. Morgan&mdash;How
+ Hyde Lost His Ranch- -The Great Landslide Case&mdash;The Trial&mdash;General
+ Buncombe in Court&mdash;A Wonderful Decision&mdash;A Serious Afterthought<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch35">CHAPTER XXXV.</a> A New Travelling Companion&mdash;All
+ Full and No Accommodations&mdash;How Captain Nye found Room&mdash;and
+ Caused Our Leaving to be Lamented&mdash;The Uses of Tunnelling&mdash;A
+ Notable Example&mdash;We Go into the "Claim" Business and Fail&mdash;At
+ the Bottom<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch36">CHAPTER XXXVI.</a> A Quartz Mill&mdash;Amalgamation&mdash;"Screening
+ Tailings"&mdash;First Quartz Mill in Nevada&mdash;Fire Assay&mdash;A Smart
+ Assayer&mdash;I stake for an advance<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch37">CHAPTER
+ XXXVII.</a> The Whiteman Cement Mine&mdash;Story of its Discovery&mdash;A
+ Secret Expedition&mdash;A Nocturnal Adventure&mdash;A Distressing Position&mdash;A
+ Failure and a Week's Holiday<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch38">CHAPTER
+ XXXVIII.</a> Mono Lake&mdash;Shampooing Made Easy&mdash;Thoughtless Act of
+ Our Dog and the Results&mdash;Lye Water&mdash;Curiosities of the Lake&mdash;Free
+ Hotel&mdash;Some Funny Incidents a Little Overdrawn<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch39">CHAPTER XXXIX.</a> Visit to the Islands in Lake Mono&mdash;Ashes
+ and Desolation&mdash;Life Amid Death Our Boat Adrift&mdash;A Jump For Life&mdash;A
+ Storm On the Lake&mdash;A Mass of Soap Suds&mdash;Geological Curiosities&mdash;A
+ Week On the Sierras&mdash;A Narrow Escape From a Funny Explosion&mdash;"Stove
+ Heap Gone"<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch40">CHAPTER XL.</a> The "Wide West"
+ Mine&mdash;It is "Interviewed" by Higbie&mdash;A Blind Lead&mdash;Worth a
+ Million&mdash;We are Rich At Last&mdash;Plans for the Future<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch41">CHAPTER XLI.</a> A Rheumatic Patient&mdash;Day Dreams&mdash;An
+ Unfortunate Stumble&mdash;I Leave Suddenly&mdash;Another Patient&mdash;Higbie
+ in the Cabin&mdash;Our Balloon Bursted&mdash;Worth Nothing&mdash;Regrets
+ and Explanations&mdash;Our Third Partner<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch42">CHAPTER
+ XLII.</a> What to do Next?&mdash;Obstacles I Had Met With&mdash;"Jack of
+ All Trades"&mdash;Mining Again&mdash;Target Shooting&mdash;I Turn City
+ Editor&mdash;I Succeed Finely<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch43">CHAPTER XLIII.</a>
+ My Friend Boggs&mdash;The School Report&mdash;Boggs Pays Me An Old Debt&mdash;Virginia
+ City<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch44">CHAPTER XLIV.</a> Flush Times&mdash;Plenty
+ of Stock&mdash;Editorial Puffing&mdash;Stocks Given Me&mdash;Salting Mines&mdash;A
+ Tragedian In a New Role<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch45">CHAPTER XLV.</a>
+ Flush Times Continue&mdash;Sanitary Commission Fund&mdash;Wild Enthusiasm
+ of the People&mdash;Would not wait to Contribute&mdash;The Sanitary Flour
+ Sack&mdash;It is Carried to Gold Hill and Dayton&mdash;Final Reception in
+ Virginia&mdash;Results of the Sale&mdash;A Grand Total<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch46">CHAPTER XLVI.</a> The Nabobs of Those Days&mdash;John
+ Smith as a Traveler&mdash;Sudden Wealth&mdash;A Sixty-Thousand-Dollar
+ Horse&mdash;A Smart Telegraph Operator&mdash;A Nabob in New York City&mdash;Charters
+ an Omnibus&mdash;"Walk in, It's All Free"&mdash;"You Can't Pay a Cent"&mdash;"Hold
+ On, Driver, I Weaken"&mdash;Sociability of New Yorkers<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch47">CHAPTER XLVII.</a> Buck Fanshaw's Death&mdash;The Cause
+ Thereof&mdash;Preparations for His Burial&mdash;Scotty Briggs the
+ Committee Man&mdash;He Visits the Minister&mdash;Scotty Can't Play His
+ Hand&mdash;The Minister Gets Mixed&mdash;Both Begin to See&mdash;"All Down
+ Again But Nine"&mdash;Buck Fanshaw as a Citizen&mdash;How To "Shook Your
+ Mother"&mdash;The Funeral&mdash;Scotty Briggs as a Sunday School Teacher<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch48">CHAPTER XLVIII.</a> The First Twenty-Six Graves in
+ Nevada&mdash;The Prominent Men of the County&mdash;The Man Who Had Killed
+ His Dozen&mdash;Trial by Jury&mdash;Specimen Jurors&mdash;A Private Grave
+ Yard&mdash;The Desperadoes&mdash;Who They Killed&mdash;Waking up the Weary
+ Passenger&mdash;Satisfaction Without Fighting<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch49">CHAPTER
+ XLIX.</a> Fatal Shooting Affray&mdash;Robbery and Desperate Affray&mdash;A
+ Specimen City Official&mdash;A Marked Man&mdash;A Street Fight&mdash;Punishment
+ of Crime<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch50">CHAPTER L.</a> Captain Ned Blakely&mdash;Bill
+ Nookes Receives Desired Information&mdash;Killing of Blakely's Mate&mdash;A
+ Walking Battery&mdash;Blakely Secures Nookes&mdash;Hang First and Be Tried
+ Afterwards&mdash;Captain Blakely as a Chaplain&mdash;The First Chapter of
+ Genesis Read at a Hanging&mdash;Nookes Hung&mdash;Blakely's Regrets<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch51">CHAPTER LI.</a> The Weekly Occidental&mdash;A Ready
+ Editor&mdash;A Novel&mdash;A Concentration of Talent&mdash;The Heroes and
+ the Heroines&mdash;The Dissolute Author Engaged&mdash;Extraordinary Havoc
+ With the Novel&mdash;A Highly Romantic Chapter&mdash;The Lovers Separated&mdash;Jonah
+ Out-done&mdash;A Lost Poem&mdash;The Aged Pilot Man&mdash;Storm On the
+ Erie Canal&mdash;Dollinger the Pilot Man&mdash;Terrific Gale&mdash;Danger
+ Increases&mdash;A Crisis Arrived&mdash;Saved as if by a Miracle<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch52">CHAPTER LII.</a> Freights to California&mdash;Silver
+ Bricks&mdash;Under Ground Mines&mdash;Timber Supports&mdash;A Visit to the
+ Mines&mdash;The Caved Mines&mdash;Total of Shipments in 1863<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch53">CHAPTER LIII.</a> Jim Blaine and his Grandfather's Ram&mdash;Filkin's
+ Mistake&mdash;Old Miss Wagner and her Glass Eye&mdash;Jacobs, the Coffin
+ Dealer&mdash;Waiting for a Customer&mdash;His Bargain With Old Robbins&mdash;Robbins
+ Sues for Damage and Collects&mdash;A New Use for Missionaries&mdash;The
+ Effect&mdash;His Uncle Lem and the Use Providence Made of Him&mdash;Sad
+ Fate of Wheeler&mdash;Devotion of His Wife&mdash;A Model Monument&mdash;What
+ About the Ram?<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch54">CHAPTER LIV.</a> Chinese in
+ Virginia City&mdash;Washing Bills&mdash;Habit of Imitation&mdash;Chinese
+ Immigration&mdash;A Visit to Chinatown&mdash;Messrs. Ah Sing, Hong Wo, See
+ Yup, &amp;c<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch55">CHAPTER LV.</a> Tired of
+ Virginia City&mdash;An Old Schoolmate&mdash;A Two Years' Loan&mdash;Acting
+ as an Editor&mdash;Almost Receive an Offer&mdash;An Accident&mdash;Three
+ Drunken Anecdotes&mdash;Last Look at Mt. Davidson&mdash;A Beautiful
+ Incident<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch56">CHAPTER LVI.</a> Off for San
+ Francisco&mdash;Western and Eastern Landscapes&mdash;The Hottest place on
+ Earth&mdash;Summer and Winter<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch57">CHAPTER LVII.</a>
+ California&mdash;Novelty of Seeing a Woman&mdash;"Well if it ain't a
+ Child!"&mdash;One Hundred and Fifty Dollars for a Kiss&mdash;Waiting for a
+ turn<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch58">CHAPTER LVIII.</a> Life in San
+ Francisco&mdash;Worthless Stocks&mdash;My First Earthquake&mdash;Reportorial
+ Instincts&mdash;Effects of the Shocks&mdash;Incidents and Curiosities&mdash;Sabbath
+ Breakers&mdash;The Lodger and the Chambermaid&mdash;A Sensible Fashion to
+ Follow&mdash;Effects of the Earthquake on the Ministers<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch59">CHAPTER LIX.</a> Poor Again&mdash;Slinking as a Business&mdash;A
+ Model Collector&mdash;Misery loves Company&mdash;Comparing Notes for
+ Comfort&mdash;A Streak of Luck&mdash;Finding a Dime&mdash;Wealthy by
+ Comparison&mdash;Two Sumptuous Dinners<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch60">CHAPTER
+ LX.</a> An Old Friend&mdash;An Educated Miner&mdash;Pocket Mining&mdash;Freaks
+ of Fortune<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch61">CHAPTER LXI.</a> Dick Baker and
+ his Cat&mdash;Tom Quartz's Peculiarities&mdash;On an Excursion&mdash;Appearance
+ On His Return&mdash;A Prejudiced Cat&mdash;Empty Pockets and a Roving Life<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch62">CHAPTER LXII.</a> Bound for the Sandwich Islands&mdash;The
+ Three Captains&mdash;The Old Admiral&mdash;His Daily Habits&mdash;His Well
+ Fought Fields&mdash;An Unexpected Opponent&mdash;The Admiral Overpowered&mdash;The
+ Victor Declared a Hero<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch63">CHAPTER LXIII.</a>
+ Arrival at the Islands&mdash;Honolulu&mdash;What I Saw There&mdash;Dress
+ and Habits of the Inhabitants&mdash;The Animal Kingdom&mdash;Fruits and
+ Delightful Effects<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch64">CHAPTER LXIV.</a> An
+ Excursion&mdash;Captain Phillips and his Turn-Out&mdash;A Horseback Ride&mdash;A
+ Vicious Animal&mdash;Nature and Art&mdash;Interesting Ruins&mdash;All
+ Praise to the Missionaries<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch65">CHAPTER LXV.</a>
+ Interesting Mementoes and Relics&mdash;An Old Legend of a Frightful Leap&mdash;An
+ Appreciative Horse&mdash;Horse Jockeys and Their Brothers&mdash;A New
+ Trick&mdash;A Hay Merchant&mdash;Good Country for Horse Lovers<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch66">CHAPTER LXVI.</a> A Saturday Afternoon&mdash;Sandwich
+ Island Girls on a Frolic&mdash;The Poi Merchant&mdash;Grand Gala Day&mdash;A
+ Native Dance&mdash;Church Membership&mdash;Cats and Officials&mdash;An
+ Overwhelming Discovery<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch67">CHAPTER LXVII.</a>
+ The Legislature of the Island&mdash;What Its President Has Seen&mdash;Praying
+ for an Enemy&mdash;Women's Rights&mdash;Romantic Fashions&mdash;Worship of
+ the Shark&mdash;Desire for Dress&mdash;Full Dress&mdash;Not Paris Style&mdash;Playing
+ Empire&mdash;Officials and Foreign Ambassadors&mdash;Overwhelming
+ Magnificence<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch68">CHAPTER LXVIII.</a> A Royal
+ Funeral&mdash;Order of Procession&mdash;Pomp and Ceremony&mdash;A Striking
+ Contrast&mdash;A Sick Monarch&mdash;Human Sacrifices at His Death&mdash;Burial
+ Orgies<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch69">CHAPTER LXIX.</a> "Once more upon the
+ Waters."&mdash;A Noisy Passenger&mdash;Several Silent Ones&mdash;A
+ Moonlight Scene&mdash;Fruits and Plantations<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch70">CHAPTER
+ LXX.</a> A Droll Character&mdash;Mrs. Beazely and Her Son&mdash;Meditations
+ on Turnips&mdash;A Letter from Horace Greeley&mdash;An Indignant Rejoinder&mdash;The
+ Letter Translated but too Late<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch71">CHAPTER LXXI.</a>
+ Kealakekua Bay&mdash;Death of Captain Cook&mdash;His Monument&mdash;Its
+ Construction&mdash;On Board the Schooner<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch72">CHAPTER
+ LXXII.</a> Young Kanakas in New England&mdash;A Temple Built by Ghosts&mdash;Female
+ Bathers&mdash;I Stood Guard&mdash;Women and Whiskey&mdash;A Fight for
+ Religion&mdash;Arrival of Missionaries<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch73">CHAPTER
+ LXXIII.</a> Native Canoes&mdash;Surf Bathing&mdash;A Sanctuary&mdash;How
+ Built&mdash;The Queen's Rock&mdash;Curiosities&mdash;Petrified Lava<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch74">CHAPTER LXXIV.</a> Visit to the Volcano&mdash;The
+ Crater&mdash;Pillar of Fire&mdash;Magnificent Spectacle&mdash;A Lake of
+ Fire<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch75">CHAPTER LXXV.</a> The North Lake&mdash;Fountains
+ of Fire&mdash;Streams of Burning Lava&mdash;Tidal Waves<br /><br /> <a
+ href="#linkch76">CHAPTER LXXVI.</a> A Reminiscence&mdash;Another Horse
+ Story&mdash;My Ride with the Retired Milk Horse- -A Picnicing Excursion&mdash;Dead
+ Volcano of Holeakala&mdash;Comparison with Vesuvius&mdash;An Inside View<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch77">CHAPTER LXXVII.</a> A Curious Character&mdash;A Series
+ of Stories&mdash;Sad Fate of a Liar&mdash;Evidence of Insanity<br /><br />
+ <a href="#linkch78">CHAPTER LXXVIII.</a> Return to San Francisco&mdash;Ship
+ Amusements&mdash;Preparing for Lecturing&mdash;Valuable Assistance Secured&mdash;My
+ First Attempt&mdash;The Audience Carried&mdash;"All's Well that Ends
+ Well."<br /><br /> <a href="#linkch79">CHAPTER LXXIX.</a> Highwaymen&mdash;A
+ Predicament&mdash;A Huge Joke&mdash;Farewell to California&mdash;At Home
+ Again&mdash;Great Changes. Moral.<br /><br /> <a href="#linkAPPENDIX">APPENDIX.
+ A.</a>&mdash;Brief Sketch of Mormon History B.&mdash;The Mountain Meadows
+ Massacre C.&mdash;Concerning a Frightful Assassination that was never
+ Consummated<br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br /> 1. <a href="#linkfrontispiece2">THE MINERS' DREAM</a><br /><br /> 2.
+ <a href="#link020">ENVIOUS CONTEMPLATIONS</a><br /><br /> 3. <a
+ href="#link021">INNOCENT DREAMS</a><br /><br /> 4. <a href="#link023a">LIGHT
+ TRAVELING ORDER</a><br /><br /> 5. <a href="#link023b">THE "ALLEN"</a><br /><br />
+ 6. <a href="#link024">INDUCEMENTS TO PURCHASE</a><br /><br /> 7. <a
+ href="#link025">THE FACETIOUS DRIVER</a><br /><br /> 8. <a href="#link026">PLEASING
+ NEWS</a><br /><br /> 9. <a href="#link027">THE SPHYNX</a><br /><br /> 10. <a
+ href="#link032">MEDITATION</a><br /><br /> 11. <a href="#link033a">ON
+ BUSINESS</a><br /><br /> 12. <a href="#link033b">AUTHOR AS GULLIVER</a><br /><br />
+ 13. <a href="#link035">A TOUCH STATEMENT</a><br /><br /> 14. <a
+ href="#link038">THIRD TRIP OF THE UNABRIDGED</a><br /><br /> 15. <a
+ href="#link041">A POWERFUL GLASS</a><br /><br /> 16. <a href="#link042a">AN
+ HEIRLOOM</a><br /><br /> 17. <a href="#link042b">OUR LANDLORD</a><br /><br />
+ 18. <a href="#link043">DIGNIFIED EXILE</a><br /><br /> 19. <a href="#link044">DRINKING
+ SLUMGULLION</a><br /><br /> 20. <a href="#link045">A JOKE WITHOUT CREAM</a><br /><br />
+ 21. <a href="#link047">PULLMAN CAR DINING-SALOON</a><br /><br /> 22. <a
+ href="#link049">OUR MORNING RIDE</a><br /><br /> 23. <a href="#link050">PRAIRIE
+ DOGS</a><br /><br /> 24. <a href="#link051">A CAYOTE</a><br /><br /> 25. <a
+ href="#link052">SHOWING RESPECT TO RELATIVES</a><br /><br /> 26. <a
+ href="#link055">THE CONDUCTOR</a><br /><br /> 27. <a href="#link057">TEACHING
+ A SUBORDINATE</a><br /><br /> 28. <a href="#link058">JACK AND THE ELDERLY
+ PILGRIM</a><br /><br /> 29. <a href="#link061">CROSSING THE PLATTE</a><br /><br />
+ 30. <a href="#link062">I BEGAN TO PRAY</a><br /><br /> 31. <a href="#link063">A
+ NEW DEPARTURE</a><br /><br /> 32. <a href="#link065">SUSPENDED OPERATIONS</a><br /><br />
+ 33. <a href="#link068">A WONDERFUL LIE</a><br /><br /> 34. <a href="#link069">TALL
+ PIECE</a><br /><br /> 35. <a href="#link071">HERE HE COMES</a><br /><br /> 36.
+ <a href="#link072">CHANGING HORSES</a><br /><br /> 37. <a href="#link073">RIDING
+ THE AVALANCHE</a><br /><br /> 38. <a href="#link076">INDIAN COUNTRY</a><br /><br />
+ 39. <a href="#link081">A PROPOSED FIST FIGHT</a><br /><br /> 40. <a
+ href="#link082">FROM BEHIND THE DOOR</a><br /><br /> 41. <a href="#link084">SLADE
+ AS AN EXECUTIONER</a><br /><br /> 42. <a href="#link085">AN UNPLEASANT VIEW</a><br /><br />
+ 43. <a href="#link088">UNAPPRECIATED POLITENESS</a><br /><br /> 44. <a
+ href="#link092">SLADE IN COURT</a><br /><br /> 45. <a href="#link095">A
+ WIFE'S LAMENTATIONS</a><br /><br /> 46. <a href="#link099">THE CONCENTRATED
+ INHABITANT</a><br /><br /> 47. <a href="#link100">THE SOUTH PASS</a><br /><br />
+ 48. <a href="#link101">THE PARTED STREAMS</a><br /><br /> 49. <a
+ href="#link102">IT SPOILED THE MELON</a><br /><br /> 50. <a href="#link103">THE
+ CAYOTE AND THE RAVEN</a><br /><br /> 51. <a href="#link104">"DON'T COME HERE
+ ...</a><br /><br /> 52. <a href="#link105">"THINK I'M A FOOL ...</a><br /><br />
+ 53. <a href="#link106">THE "DESTROYING ANGEL...</a><br /><br /> 54. <a
+ href="#link109">EFFECTS OF "VALLEY TAN"</a><br /><br /> 55. <a
+ href="#link110a">ONE CREST</a><br /><br /> 56. <a href="#link110b">THE OTHER</a><br /><br />
+ 57. <a href="#link111">THE VAGRANT</a><br /><br /> 58. <a href="#link112">PORTRAIT
+ OF EBER KIMBALL</a><br /><br /> 59. <a href="#link113">PORTRAIT OR BRIGHAM
+ YOUNG</a><br /><br /> 60. <a href="#link116">THE CONTRACTORS BEFORE THE KING</a><br /><br />
+ 61. <a href="#link117">I WAS TOUCHED</a><br /><br /> 62. <a href="#link118">THE
+ ENDOWMENT</a><br /><br /> 63. <a href="#link120">FAVORITE WIFE AND D.4</a><br /><br />
+ 64. <a href="#link121">NEEDED MARKING</a><br /><br /> 65. <a href="#link124">A
+ REMARKABLE RESEMBLANCE</a><br /><br /> 66. <a href="#link126">THE FAMILY
+ BEDSTEAD</a><br /><br /> 67. <a href="#link131">THE MIRACULOUS COMPASS</a><br /><br />
+ 68. <a href="#link137">THREE SIDES TO A QUESTION</a><br /><br /> 69. <a
+ href="#link138">RESULT OF HFGH FREIGHTS</a><br /><br /> 70. <a
+ href="#link139">A SHRIVELED QUARTER</a><br /><br /> 71. <a href="#link140">AN
+ OBJECT OF PITY</a><br /><br /> 72. <a href="#link141">TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br />
+ 73. <a href="#link145">TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br /> 74. <a href="#link147">GOSHOTT
+ INDIANS HANGING AROUND</a><br /><br /> 75. <a href="#link148">THE DRIVE FOR
+ LIFE</a><br /><br /> 76. <a href="#link151">GREELEY'S RIDE</a><br /><br /> 77.
+ <a href="#link154">BOTTLING AN ANECDOTE</a><br /><br /> 78. <a
+ href="#link156">TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br /> 79. <a href="#link158">CONTEMPLATION</a><br /><br />
+ 80. <a href="#link159">THE WASHOE ZEPHYR</a><br /><br /> 81. <a
+ href="#link161">THE GOVERNOR'S HOUSE</a><br /><br /> 82. <a href="#link162">DARK
+ DISCLOSURES</a><br /><br /> 83. <a href="#link163">THE IRISH BRIGADE</a><br /><br />
+ 84. <a href="#link164">RECREATION</a><br /><br /> 85. <a href="#link165">THE
+ TARANTULA</a><br /><br /> 86. <a href="#link166">LIGHT THROWN ON THE SUBJECT</a><br /><br />
+ 87. <a href="#link169">I STEERED</a><br /><br /> 88. <a href="#link170">THE
+ INVALID</a><br /><br /> 89. <a href="#link171">THE RESTORED</a><br /><br />
+ 90. <a href="#link172">OUR HOUSE</a><br /><br /> 91. <a href="#link174">AT
+ BUSINESS</a><br /><br /> 92. <a href="#link176">FIGHT AT LAKE TAHOE</a><br /><br />
+ 93. <a href="#link179">"THINK HIM AN AMERICAN HORSE"</a><br /><br /> 94. <a
+ href="#link180">UNEXPECTED ELEVATION</a><br /><br /> 95. <a href="#link181">UNIVERSALLY
+ UNSETTLED</a><br /><br /> 96. <a href="#link182">RIDING THE PLUG</a><br /><br />
+ 97. <a href="#link183">WANTED EXERCISE</a><br /><br /> 98. <a href="#link186">BORROWING
+ MADE EASY</a><br /><br /> 99. <a href="#link188">FREE RIDES</a><br /><br />
+ 100. <a href="#link190">SATISFACTORY VOUCHERS</a><br /><br /> 101. <a
+ href="#link191">NEEDS PRAYING FOR</a><br /><br /> 102. <a href="#link192">MAP
+ OF TOLL ROADS</a><br /><br /> 103. <a href="#link194">UNLOADING SILVER
+ BRICKS</a><br /><br /> 104. <a href="#link196">VIEW IN HUMBOLDT MOUNTAINS</a><br /><br />
+ 105. <a href="#link199">GOING TO HUMBOLDT</a><br /><br /> 106. <a
+ href="#link201">BALLOU'S BEDFELLOW</a><br /><br /> 107. <a href="#link202">PLEASURES
+ OF CAMPING OUT</a><br /><br /> 108. <a href="#link205">THE SECRET SEARCH</a><br /><br />
+ 109. <a href="#link207">"CAST YOUR EYE ON THAT ...</a><br /><br /> 110. <a
+ href="#link210">"WE'VE GOT IT"</a><br /><br /> 111. <a href="#link212">INCIPIENT
+ MILLIONAIRES</a><br /><br /> 112. <a href="#link214">ROCKS-TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br />
+ 113. <a href="#link216">"DO YOU SEE IT?"</a><br /><br /> 114. <a
+ href="#link218">FAREWELL SWEET RIVER</a><br /><br /> 115. <a href="#link219">THE
+ RESCUE</a><br /><br /> 116. <a href="#link222">"MR. ARKANSAS ...</a><br /><br />
+ 117. <a href="#link225">AN ARMED ALLY</a><br /><br /> 118. <a href="#link227">CROSSING
+ THE FLOOD</a><br /><br /> 119. <a href="#link229">ADVANCE IN A CIRCLE</a><br /><br />
+ 120, <a href="#link230">THE SONGSTER</a><br /><br /> 121. <a href="#link231">THE
+ FOXES HAVE HOLES-TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br /> 122. <a href="#link233">A FLAT
+ FAILURE</a><br /><br /> 123. <a href="#link234">THE LAST MATCH</a><br /><br />
+ 124. <a href="#link236">DISCARDED VICES</a><br /><br /> 125. <a
+ href="#link237">FLAMES-TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br /> 127. <a href="#link240">IT
+ WAS THUS WE MET</a><br /><br /> 128. <a href="#link242">TAKING POSSESSION</a><br /><br />
+ 129. <a href="#link244">A GREAT EFFORT</a><br /><br /> 130. <a
+ href="#link246">REARRANGING AND SHIFTING</a><br /><br /> 131. <a
+ href="#link249">WE LEFT LAMENTED</a><br /><br /> 132. <a href="#link250">PICTURE
+ OF TOWNSEND'S TUNNEL</a><br /><br /> 133. <a href="#link253">QUARTZ MILL</a><br /><br />
+ 134. <a href="#link254">ANOTHER PROCESS OF AMALGAMATION</a>&nbsp;<br /><br />
+ 135. <a href="#link256">FIRST QUARTZ MILL IN NEVADA</a><br /><br /> 136. <a
+ href="#link257">A SLICE OF RICH ORE</a><br /><br /> 137. <a href="#link260">THE
+ SAVED BROTHER</a><br /><br /> 138. <a href="#link268">ON A SECRET EXPEDITION</a><br /><br />
+ 139. <a href="#link265">LAKE MONO</a><br /><br /> 140. <a href="#link266a">RATHER
+ SOAPY</a><br /><br /> 141. <a href="#link266b">A BARK UNDER FULL SAIL</a><br /><br />
+ 142. <a href="#link268">A MODEL BOARDING HOUSE</a><br /><br /> 143. <a
+ href="#link271">LIFE AMID DEATH</a><br /><br /> 144. <a href="#link273">A
+ JUMP FOR LIFE</a><br /><br /> 145. <a href="#link275">"STOVE HEAP GONE"</a><br /><br />
+ 146. <a href="#link279">INTERVIEWING THE "WIDE WEST"</a><br /><br /> 147. <a
+ href="#link280">WORTH A MILLION</a><br /><br /> 148. <a href="#link282">MILLIONAIRES
+ LAYING PLANS</a><br /><br /> 149. <a href="#link287">DANGEROUSLY SICK</a><br /><br />
+ 150. <a href="#link288">WORTH NOTHING</a><br /><br /> 151. <a href="#link294">THE
+ COMPROMISE</a><br /><br /> 152. <a href="#link293">ONE OF MY FAILURES</a><br /><br />
+ 153. <a href="#link294">TARGET SHOOTING</a><br /><br /> 154. <a
+ href="#link295">AS CITY EDITOR</a><br /><br /> 155. <a href="#link296">THE
+ ENTIRE MARKET</a><br /><br /> 156. <a href="#link297">A FRIEND INDEED</a><br /><br />
+ 157. <a href="#link298">UNION-TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br /> 158. <a
+ href="#link301">AN EDUCATIONAL REPORT</a><br /><br /> 159. <a href="#link302">NO
+ PARTICULAR HURRY</a><br /><br /> 160. <a href="#link304">VIEW OF VIRGINIA
+ CITY AND MT. DAVIDSON</a><br /><br /> 161. <a href="#link307">A NEW MINE</a><br /><br />
+ 162. <a href="#link309">TRY A FEW</a><br /><br /> 163. <a href="#link310">PORTRAIT
+ OF MR. STEWART</a><br /><br /> 164. <a href="#link311">SELLING A MINE</a><br /><br />
+ 165. <a href="#link315">COULDN'T WAIT</a><br /><br /> 166. <a href="#link317">THE
+ GREAT "FLOUR SACS" PROCESSION</a><br /><br /> 167. <a href="#link319">TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br />
+ 168. <a href="#link321">A NABOB</a><br /><br /> 169. <a href="#link323">MAGNIFICENCE
+ AND MISERY</a><br /><br /> 170. <a href="#link326">A FRIENDLY DRIVER</a><br /><br />
+ 171. <a href="#link327">ASTONISHES THE NATIVES</a><br /><br /> 172. <a
+ href="#link328">COL. JACK WEAKENS</a><br /><br /> 173. <a href="#link331">SCOTTY
+ BRIGGS AND THE MINISTER</a><br /><br /> 174. <a href="#link335">REGULATING
+ MATTERS</a><br /><br /> 175. <a href="#link337">DIDN'T SHOOK HIS MOTHER</a><br /><br />
+ 176. <a href="#link338">SCOTTY AS S. S. TEACHER</a><br /><br /> 177. <a
+ href="#link340">THE MAN WHO HAD KILLED HIS DOZEN</a><br /><br /> 178. <a
+ href="#link342">THE UNPREJUDICED JURY</a><br /><br /> 179. <a href="#link344">A
+ DESPERADO GIVING REFERENCE</a><br /><br /> 180. <a href="#link346">SATISFYING
+ A FOE</a><br /><br /> 181. <a href="#link351">TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br /> 182.
+ <a href="#link353">GIVING INFORMATION</a><br /><br /> 183. <a href="#link355">A
+ WALKING BATTERY</a><br /><br /> 184. <a href="#link358">OVERHAULING HIS
+ MANIFEST</a><br /><br /> 185. <a href="#link359">SHIP-TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br />
+ 186. <a href="#link361">THE HEROES AND HEROINES OF THE STORY</a><br /><br />
+ 187. <a href="#link362">DISSOLUTE AUTHOR</a><br /><br /> 188. <a
+ href="#link365">THERE SAT THE LAWYER</a><br /><br /> 189. <a href="#link367">JONAH
+ OUTDONE</a><br /><br /> 190. <a href="#link370">DOLLINGER</a><br /><br /> 191.
+ <a href="#link371">LOW BRIDGE</a><br /><br /> 192. <a href="#link372">SHORTENING
+ SAIL</a><br /><br /> 193. <a href="#link374">LIGHTENING SHIP</a><br /><br />
+ 194. <a href="#link375">THE MARVELLOUS RESCUE</a><br /><br /> 195. <a
+ href="#link377">SILVER BRICKS</a><br /><br /> 196. <a href="#link379">TIMBER
+ SUPPORTS</a><br /><br /> 197. <a href="#link380">FROM GALLERY TO GALLERY</a><br /><br />
+ 198. <a href="#link384">JIM BLAINE</a><br /><br /> 199. <a href="#link385">HURRAH
+ FOR NIXON</a><br /><br /> 200. <a href="#link386">MISS WAGNER</a><br /><br />
+ 201. <a href="#link387">WAITING FOR A CUSTOMER</a><br /><br /> 202. <a
+ href="#link388">WAS TO BE THERE</a><br /><br /> 209. <a href="#link389">THE
+ MONUMENT</a><br /><br /> 205. <a href="#link390">WHERE IS THE RAM-TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br />
+ 205. <a href="#link392">CHINESE WASH BILL</a><br /><br /> 206. <a
+ href="#link393">IMITATION</a><br /><br /> 207. <a href="#link396">CHINESE
+ LOTTERY</a><br /><br /> 208. <a href="#link397">CHINESE MERCHANT AT HOME</a><br /><br />
+ 209. <a href="#link399">AN OLD FRIEND</a><br /><br /> 210. <a href="#link403">FAREWELL
+ AND ACCIDENT</a><br /><br /> 211. <a href="#link404">"GIMME A CIGAR"</a><br /><br />
+ 212. <a href="#link406">THE HERALD OF GLAD NEWS</a><br /><br /> 213. <a
+ href="#link407">FLAG-TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br /> 214. <a href="#link409">A
+ NEW ENGLAND SCENE</a><br /><br /> 215. <a href="#link410">A VARIABLE CLIMATE</a><br /><br />
+ 216. <a href="#link413">SACRAMENTO AND THREE NODES AWAY</a><br /><br /> 217.
+ <a href="#link416">"FETCH HER OUT ...</a><br /><br /> 218. <a href="#link417">"WELL
+ IF IT AINT A CHILD ...</a><br /><br /> 219. <a href="#link418">A GENUINE
+ LIVE WOMAN</a><br /><br /> 220. <a href="#link420">THE GRACE OF A KANGAROO</a><br /><br />
+ 221. <a href="#link421">DREAMS DISSIPATED</a><br /><br /> 222. <a
+ href="#link422">THE "ONE HORSE SHAY" OUTDONE</a><br /><br /> 223. <a
+ href="#link423a">HARD ON THE INNOCENTS</a><br /><br /> 224. <a
+ href="#link423b">DRY BONES SHAKEN</a><br /><br /> 225. <a href="#link424">"OH!
+ WHAT, SHALL I DO!...</a><br /><br /> 226. <a href="#link425">"GET OUT YOUR
+ TOWEL MY DEAR"</a><br /><br /> 227. <a href="#link426">"WE WILL OMIT THE
+ BENEDICTION...</a><br /><br /> 228. <a href="#link429">SLINKING</a><br /><br />
+ 229. <a href="#link431">A PRIZE</a><br /><br /> 230. <a href="#link432">A
+ LOOK IN AT THE WINDOW</a><br /><br /> 231. <a href="#link433">"DO IT
+ STRANGER"</a><br /><br /> 232. <a href="#link436">THE OLD COLLEGIATE</a><br /><br />
+ 233. <a href="#link437">STRIKING A POCKET</a><br /><br /> 234. <a
+ href="#link440">TOM QUARTZ</a><br /><br /> 235. <a href="#link441">AN
+ ADVANTAGE TAKEN</a><br /><br /> 236. <a href="#link442">AFTER AN EXCURSION</a><br /><br />
+ 237. <a href="#link445">THE THREE CAPTAINS</a><br /><br /> 238. <a
+ href="#link448">THE OLD ADMIRAL</a><br /><br /> 239. <a href="#link449">THE
+ DESERTED FIELD</a><br /><br /> 240. <a href="#link453">WILLIAMS</a><br /><br />
+ 241. <a href="#link455">SCENE ON THE SANDWICH ISLANDS</a><br /><br /> 242.
+ <a href="#link456">FASHIONABLE ATTIRE</a><br /><br /> 243. <a href="#link457">A
+ BITE</a><br /><br /> 244. <a href="#link458">RECONNOITERING</a><br /><br />
+ 246. <a href="#link461">LOOKING FOR MISCHIEF</a><br /><br /> 247. <a
+ href="#link462">A FAMILY LIKENESS</a><br /><br /> 248. <a href="#link467">SIT
+ DOWN To LISTEN</a><br /><br /> 249. <a href="#link469">"MY BROTHER, WE
+ TWINS"</a><br /><br /> 250. <a href="#link470">EXTRAORDINARY CAPERS</a><br /><br />
+ 251. <a href="#link471">A LOAD OF HAY</a><br /><br /> 252. <a href="#link472">MARCHING
+ THROUGH GEORGIA</a><br /><br /> 253. <a href="#link474">SANDWICH ISLAND
+ GIRLS</a><br /><br /> 254. <a href="#link475">ORIGINAL HAM SANDWICH</a><br /><br />
+ 255. <a href="#link478">"I KISSED HIM FOR HIS MOTHER"</a><br /><br /> 256.
+ <a href="#link479">AN OUTSIDER</a><br /><br /> 257. <a href="#link482">AN
+ ENEMY'S PRAYER</a><br /><br /> 258. <a href="#link484">VISITING THE
+ MISSIONARIES</a><br /><br /> 259. <a href="#link485">FULL CHURCH DRESS</a><br /><br />
+ 260. <a href="#link486">PLAYING EMPIRE</a><br /><br /> 261. <a
+ href="#link488">ROYALTY AND ITS SATELLITES</a><br /><br /> 262. <a
+ href="#link489">A HIGH PRIVATE</a><br /><br /> 263. <a href="#link492">A
+ MODERN FUNERAL</a><br /><br /> 264. <a href="#link497">FORMER FUNERAL ORGIES</a><br /><br />
+ 265. <a href="#link499">A PASSENGER</a><br /><br /> 266. <a href="#link501">MOONLIGHT
+ ON THE WATER</a><br /><br /> 267. <a href="#link502">GOING INTO THE
+ MOUNTAINS</a><br /><br /> 268. <a href="#link503">EVENING</a><br /><br /> 289.
+ <a href="#link505">THE DEMENTED</a><br /><br /> 270. <a href="#link507">DISCUSSING
+ TURNIPS</a><br /><br /> 271. <a href="#link509">GREELEY'S LETTER</a><br /><br />
+ 272. <a href="#link514">KEALAKEKUA BAY AND COOK'S MONUMENT</a><br /><br />
+ 273. <a href="#link518">THE GHOSTLY BUILDERS</a><br /><br /> 274. <a
+ href="#link519">ON GUARD</a><br /><br /> 275. <a href="#link521">BREAKING
+ THE TABU</a><br /><br /> 276. <a href="#link525">SURF BATHING</a><br /><br />
+ 277. <a href="#link526">SURF BATHING A FAILURE</a><br /><br /> 278. <a
+ href="#link527">CITY OF REFUGE</a><br /><br /> 279. <a href="#link529">THE
+ QUEEN'S ROCK</a><br /><br /> 280. <a href="#link531">TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br />
+ 281. <a href="#link533">THE PILLAR OF FIRE</a><br /><br /> 282. <a
+ href="#link535">THE CRATER</a><br /><br /> 283. <a href="#link539">BROKE
+ THROUGH</a><br /><br /> 284. <a href="#link540">FIRE FOUNTAINS</a><br /><br />
+ 285. <a href="#link542">LAVA STREAM</a><br /><br /> 286. <a href="#link543">A
+ TIDAL WAVE</a><br /><br /> 287. <a href="#link545">TRIP ON THE MILKY WAY</a><br /><br />
+ 288. <a href="#link547">A VIEW IN THE TAO VALLEY</a><br /><br /> 289. <a
+ href="#link549">MAGNIFICENT SPORT</a><br /><br /> 290. <a href="#link553">ELEVEN
+ MILES TO SEE</a><br /><br /> 291. <a href="#link554">CHASED BY A STORM</a><br /><br />
+ 292. <a href="#link555">LEAVING WORK</a><br /><br /> 293. <a href="#link557">TAIL-PIECE</a><br /><br />
+ 294. <a href="#link559">OUR AMUSEMENTS</a><br /><br /> 295. <a
+ href="#link561">SEVERE CASE OF STAGE FRIGHT</a><br /><br /> 296. <a
+ href="#link562">MY THREE PARQUETTE ALLIES</a><br /><br /> 297. <a
+ href="#link562">SAWYER IN THE CIRCLE</a><br /><br /> 298. <a href="#link567">A
+ PREDICAMENT</a><br /><br /> 299. <a href="#link569">THE BEST OF THE JOKE</a><br /><br />
+ 300. <a href="#link570">THE END</a><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br />
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch01" id="linkch01"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER I.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ My brother had just been appointed Secretary of Nevada Territory&mdash;an
+ office of such majesty that it concentrated in itself the duties and
+ dignities of Treasurer, Comptroller, Secretary of State, and Acting
+ Governor in the Governor's absence. A salary of eighteen hundred dollars a
+ year and the title of "Mr. Secretary," gave to the great position an air
+ of wild and imposing grandeur. I was young and ignorant, and I envied my
+ brother. I coveted his distinction and his financial splendor, but
+ particularly and especially the long, strange journey he was going to
+ make, and the curious new world he was going to explore. He was going to
+ travel! I never had been away from home, and that word "travel" had a
+ seductive charm for me. Pretty soon he would be hundreds and hundreds of
+ miles away on the great plains and deserts, and among the mountains of the
+ Far West, and would see buffaloes and Indians, and prairie dogs, and
+ antelopes, and have all kinds of adventures, and may be get hanged or
+ scalped, and have ever such a fine time, and write home and tell us all
+ about it, and be a hero. And he would see the gold mines and the silver
+ mines, and maybe go about of an afternoon when his work was done, and pick
+ up two or three pailfuls of shining slugs, and nuggets of gold and silver
+ on the hillside. And by and by he would become very rich, and return home
+ by sea, and be able to talk as calmly about San Francisco and the ocean,
+ and "the isthmus" as if it was nothing of any consequence to have seen
+ those marvels face to face.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link020" id="link020"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="020.jpg (69K)" src="images/020.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ What I suffered in contemplating his happiness, pen cannot describe. And
+ so, when he offered me, in cold blood, the sublime position of private
+ secretary under him, it appeared to me that the heavens and the earth
+ passed away, and the firmament was rolled together as a scroll! I had
+ nothing more to desire. My contentment was complete.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At the end of an hour or two I was ready for the journey. Not much packing
+ up was necessary, because we were going in the overland stage from the
+ Missouri frontier to Nevada, and passengers were only allowed a small
+ quantity of baggage apiece. There was no Pacific railroad in those fine
+ times of ten or twelve years ago&mdash;not a single rail of it. I only
+ proposed to stay in Nevada three months&mdash;I had no thought of staying
+ longer than that. I meant to see all I could that was new and strange, and
+ then hurry home to business. I little thought that I would not see the end
+ of that three-month pleasure excursion for six or seven uncommonly long
+ years!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I dreamed all night about Indians, deserts, and silver bars, and in due
+ time, next day, we took shipping at the St. Louis wharf on board a
+ steamboat bound up the Missouri River.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link021" id="link021"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="021.jpg (82K)" src="images/021.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We were six days going from St. Louis to "St. Jo."&mdash;a trip that was
+ so dull, and sleepy, and eventless that it has left no more impression on
+ my memory than if its duration had been six minutes instead of that many
+ days. No record is left in my mind, now, concerning it, but a confused
+ jumble of savage-looking snags, which we deliberately walked over with one
+ wheel or the other; and of reefs which we butted and butted, and then
+ retired from and climbed over in some softer place; and of sand-bars which
+ we roosted on occasionally, and rested, and then got out our crutches and
+ sparred over.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In fact, the boat might almost as well have gone to St. Jo. by land, for
+ she was walking most of the time, anyhow&mdash;climbing over reefs and
+ clambering over snags patiently and laboriously all day long. The captain
+ said she was a "bully" boat, and all she wanted was more "shear" and a
+ bigger wheel. I thought she wanted a pair of stilts, but I had the deep
+ sagacity not to say so.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch02" id="linkch02"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER II.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The first thing we did on that glad evening that landed us at St. Joseph
+ was to hunt up the stage-office, and pay a hundred and fifty dollars
+ apiece for tickets per overland coach to Carson City, Nevada.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link023a" id="link023a"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="023a.jpg (31K)" src="images/023a.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The next morning, bright and early, we took a hasty breakfast, and hurried
+ to the starting-place. Then an inconvenience presented itself which we had
+ not properly appreciated before, namely, that one cannot make a heavy
+ traveling trunk stand for twenty-five pounds of baggage&mdash;because it
+ weighs a good deal more. But that was all we could take&mdash;twenty-five
+ pounds each. So we had to snatch our trunks open, and make a selection in
+ a good deal of a hurry. We put our lawful twenty-five pounds apiece all in
+ one valise, and shipped the trunks back to St. Louis again. It was a sad
+ parting, for now we had no swallow-tail coats and white kid gloves to wear
+ at Pawnee receptions in the Rocky Mountains, and no stove-pipe hats nor
+ patent-leather boots, nor anything else necessary to make life calm and
+ peaceful. We were reduced to a war-footing. Each of us put on a rough,
+ heavy suit of clothing, woolen army shirt and "stogy" boots included; and
+ into the valise we crowded a few white shirts, some under-clothing and
+ such things. My brother, the Secretary, took along about four pounds of
+ United States statutes and six pounds of Unabridged Dictionary; for we did
+ not know&mdash;poor innocents&mdash;that such things could be bought in
+ San Francisco on one day and received in Carson City the next. I was armed
+ to the teeth with a pitiful little Smith &amp; Wesson's seven-shooter,
+ which carried a ball like a homoeopathic pill, and it took the whole seven
+ to make a dose for an adult. But I thought it was grand. It appeared to me
+ to be a dangerous weapon. It only had one fault&mdash;you could not hit
+ anything with it. One of our "conductors" practiced awhile on a cow with
+ it, and as long as she stood still and behaved herself she was safe; but
+ as soon as she went to moving about, and he got to shooting at other
+ things, she came to grief. The Secretary had a small-sized Colt's revolver
+ strapped around him for protection against the Indians, and to guard
+ against accidents he carried it uncapped. Mr. George Bemis was dismally
+ formidable. George Bemis was our fellow-traveler.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link023b" id="link023b"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="023b.jpg (11K)" src="images/023b.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We had never seen him before. He wore in his belt an old original "Allen"
+ revolver, such as irreverent people called a "pepper-box." Simply drawing
+ the trigger back, cocked and fired the pistol. As the trigger came back,
+ the hammer would begin to rise and the barrel to turn over, and presently
+ down would drop the hammer, and away would speed the ball. To aim along
+ the turning barrel and hit the thing aimed at was a feat which was
+ probably never done with an "Allen" in the world. But George's was a
+ reliable weapon, nevertheless, because, as one of the stage-drivers
+ afterward said, "If she didn't get what she went after, she would fetch
+ something else." And so she did. She went after a deuce of spades nailed
+ against a tree, once, and fetched a mule standing about thirty yards to
+ the left of it. Bemis did not want the mule; but the owner came out with a
+ double-barreled shotgun and persuaded him to buy it, anyhow. It was a
+ cheerful weapon&mdash;the "Allen." Sometimes all its six barrels would go
+ off at once, and then there was no safe place in all the region round
+ about, but behind it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link024" id="link024"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="024.jpg (96K)" src="images/024.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We took two or three blankets for protection against frosty weather in the
+ mountains. In the matter of luxuries we were modest&mdash;we took none
+ along but some pipes and five pounds of smoking tobacco. We had two large
+ canteens to carry water in, between stations on the Plains, and we also
+ took with us a little shot-bag of silver coin for daily expenses in the
+ way of breakfasts and dinners.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By eight o'clock everything was ready, and we were on the other side of
+ the river. We jumped into the stage, the driver cracked his whip, and we
+ bowled away and left "the States" behind us. It was a superb summer
+ morning, and all the landscape was brilliant with sunshine. There was a
+ freshness and breeziness, too, and an exhilarating sense of emancipation
+ from all sorts of cares and responsibilities, that almost made us feel
+ that the years we had spent in the close, hot city, toiling and slaving,
+ had been wasted and thrown away. We were spinning along through Kansas,
+ and in the course of an hour and a half we were fairly abroad on the great
+ Plains. Just here the land was rolling&mdash;a grand sweep of regular
+ elevations and depressions as far as the eye could reach&mdash;like the
+ stately heave and swell of the ocean's bosom after a storm. And everywhere
+ were cornfields, accenting with squares of deeper green, this limitless
+ expanse of grassy land. But presently this sea upon dry ground was to lose
+ its "rolling" character and stretch away for seven hundred miles as level
+ as a floor!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Our coach was a great swinging and swaying stage, of the most sumptuous
+ description&mdash;an imposing cradle on wheels. It was drawn by six
+ handsome horses, and by the side of the driver sat the "conductor," the
+ legitimate captain of the craft; for it was his business to take charge
+ and care of the mails, baggage, express matter, and passengers. We three
+ were the only passengers, this trip. We sat on the back seat, inside.
+ About all the rest of the coach was full of mail bags&mdash;for we had
+ three days' delayed mails with us. Almost touching our knees, a
+ perpendicular wall of mail matter rose up to the roof. There was a great
+ pile of it strapped on top of the stage, and both the fore and hind boots
+ were full. We had twenty-seven hundred pounds of it aboard, the driver
+ said&mdash;"a little for Brigham, and Carson, and 'Frisco, but the heft of
+ it for the Injuns, which is powerful troublesome 'thout they get plenty of
+ truck to read."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link026" id="link026"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="026.jpg (65K)" src="images/026.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But as he just then got up a fearful convulsion of his countenance which
+ was suggestive of a wink being swallowed by an earthquake, we guessed that
+ his remark was intended to be facetious, and to mean that we would unload
+ the most of our mail matter somewhere on the Plains and leave it to the
+ Indians, or whosoever wanted it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link025" id="link025"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="025.jpg (32K)" src="images/025.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We changed horses every ten miles, all day long, and fairly flew over the
+ hard, level road. We jumped out and stretched our legs every time the
+ coach stopped, and so the night found us still vivacious and unfatigued.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After supper a woman got in, who lived about fifty miles further on, and
+ we three had to take turns at sitting outside with the driver and
+ conductor. Apparently she was not a talkative woman. She would sit there
+ in the gathering twilight and fasten her steadfast eyes on a mosquito
+ rooting into her arm, and slowly she would raise her other hand till she
+ had got his range, and then she would launch a slap at him that would have
+ jolted a cow; and after that she would sit and contemplate the corpse with
+ tranquil satisfaction&mdash;for she never missed her mosquito; she was a
+ dead shot at short range. She never removed a carcase, but left them there
+ for bait. I sat by this grim Sphynx and watched her kill thirty or forty
+ mosquitoes&mdash;watched her, and waited for her to say something, but she
+ never did. So I finally opened the conversation myself. I said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "The mosquitoes are pretty bad, about here, madam."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You bet!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "What did I understand you to say, madam?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You BET!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link027" id="link027"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="027.jpg (31K)" src="images/027.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then she cheered up, and faced around and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Danged if I didn't begin to think you fellers was deef and dumb. I did,
+ b'gosh. Here I've sot, and sot, and sot, a-bust'n muskeeters and wonderin'
+ what was ailin' ye. Fust I thot you was deef and dumb, then I thot you was
+ sick or crazy, or suthin', and then by and by I begin to reckon you was a
+ passel of sickly fools that couldn't think of nothing to say. Wher'd ye
+ come from?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Sphynx was a Sphynx no more! The fountains of her great deep were
+ broken up, and she rained the nine parts of speech forty days and forty
+ nights, metaphorically speaking, and buried us under a desolating deluge
+ of trivial gossip that left not a crag or pinnacle of rejoinder projecting
+ above the tossing waste of dislocated grammar and decomposed
+ pronunciation!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ How we suffered, suffered, suffered! She went on, hour after hour, till I
+ was sorry I ever opened the mosquito question and gave her a start. She
+ never did stop again until she got to her journey's end toward daylight;
+ and then she stirred us up as she was leaving the stage (for we were
+ nodding, by that time), and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Now you git out at Cottonwood, you fellers, and lay over a couple o'
+ days, and I'll be along some time to-night, and if I can do ye any good by
+ edgin' in a word now and then, I'm right thar. Folks'll tell you't I've
+ always ben kind o' offish and partic'lar for a gal that's raised in the
+ woods, and I am, with the rag-tag and bob-tail, and a gal has to be, if
+ she wants to be anything, but when people comes along which is my equals,
+ I reckon I'm a pretty sociable heifer after all."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We resolved not to "lay by at Cottonwood."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch03" id="linkch03"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER III.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ About an hour and a half before daylight we were bowling along smoothly
+ over the road&mdash;so smoothly that our cradle only rocked in a gentle,
+ lulling way, that was gradually soothing us to sleep, and dulling our
+ consciousness&mdash;when something gave away under us! We were dimly aware
+ of it, but indifferent to it. The coach stopped. We heard the driver and
+ conductor talking together outside, and rummaging for a lantern, and
+ swearing because they could not find it&mdash;but we had no interest in
+ whatever had happened, and it only added to our comfort to think of those
+ people out there at work in the murky night, and we snug in our nest with
+ the curtains drawn. But presently, by the sounds, there seemed to be an
+ examination going on, and then the driver's voice said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "By George, the thoroughbrace is broke!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This startled me broad awake&mdash;as an undefined sense of calamity is
+ always apt to do. I said to myself: "Now, a thoroughbrace is probably part
+ of a horse; and doubtless a vital part, too, from the dismay in the
+ driver's voice. Leg, maybe&mdash;and yet how could he break his leg
+ waltzing along such a road as this? No, it can't be his leg. That is
+ impossible, unless he was reaching for the driver. Now, what can be the
+ thoroughbrace of a horse, I wonder? Well, whatever comes, I shall not air
+ my ignorance in this crowd, anyway."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Just then the conductor's face appeared at a lifted curtain, and his
+ lantern glared in on us and our wall of mail matter. He said: "Gents,
+ you'll have to turn out a spell. Thoroughbrace is broke."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We climbed out into a chill drizzle, and felt ever so homeless and dreary.
+ When I found that the thing they called a "thoroughbrace" was the massive
+ combination of belts and springs which the coach rocks itself in, I said
+ to the driver:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I never saw a thoroughbrace used up like that, before, that I can
+ remember. How did it happen?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why, it happened by trying to make one coach carry three days' mail&mdash;that's
+ how it happened," said he. "And right here is the very direction which is
+ wrote on all the newspaper-bags which was to be put out for the Injuns for
+ to keep 'em quiet. It's most uncommon lucky, becuz it's so nation dark I
+ should 'a' gone by unbeknowns if that air thoroughbrace hadn't broke."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I knew that he was in labor with another of those winks of his, though I
+ could not see his face, because he was bent down at work; and wishing him
+ a safe delivery, I turned to and helped the rest get out the mail-sacks.
+ It made a great pyramid by the roadside when it was all out. When they had
+ mended the thoroughbrace we filled the two boots again, but put no mail on
+ top, and only half as much inside as there was before. The conductor bent
+ all the seat-backs down, and then filled the coach just half full of
+ mail-bags from end to end. We objected loudly to this, for it left us no
+ seats. But the conductor was wiser than we, and said a bed was better than
+ seats, and moreover, this plan would protect his thoroughbraces. We never
+ wanted any seats after that. The lazy bed was infinitely preferable. I had
+ many an exciting day, subsequently, lying on it reading the statutes and
+ the dictionary, and wondering how the characters would turn out.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The conductor said he would send back a guard from the next station to
+ take charge of the abandoned mail-bags, and we drove on.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was now just dawn; and as we stretched our cramped legs full length on
+ the mail sacks, and gazed out through the windows across the wide wastes
+ of greensward clad in cool, powdery mist, to where there was an expectant
+ look in the eastern horizon, our perfect enjoyment took the form of a
+ tranquil and contented ecstasy. The stage whirled along at a spanking
+ gait, the breeze flapping curtains and suspended coats in a most
+ exhilarating way; the cradle swayed and swung luxuriously, the pattering
+ of the horses' hoofs, the cracking of the driver's whip, and his "Hi-yi!
+ g'lang!" were music; the spinning ground and the waltzing trees appeared
+ to give us a mute hurrah as we went by, and then slack up and look after
+ us with interest, or envy, or something; and as we lay and smoked the pipe
+ of peace and compared all this luxury with the years of tiresome city life
+ that had gone before it, we felt that there was only one complete and
+ satisfying happiness in the world, and we had found it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After breakfast, at some station whose name I have forgotten, we three
+ climbed up on the seat behind the driver, and let the conductor have our
+ bed for a nap. And by and by, when the sun made me drowsy, I lay down on
+ my face on top of the coach, grasping the slender iron railing, and slept
+ for an hour or more. That will give one an appreciable idea of those
+ matchless roads. Instinct will make a sleeping man grip a fast hold of the
+ railing when the stage jolts, but when it only swings and sways, no grip
+ is necessary. Overland drivers and conductors used to sit in their places
+ and sleep thirty or forty minutes at a time, on good roads, while spinning
+ along at the rate of eight or ten miles an hour. I saw them do it, often.
+ There was no danger about it; a sleeping man will seize the irons in time
+ when the coach jolts. These men were hard worked, and it was not possible
+ for them to stay awake all the time.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By and by we passed through Marysville, and over the Big Blue and Little
+ Sandy; thence about a mile, and entered Nebraska. About a mile further on,
+ we came to the Big Sandy&mdash;one hundred and eighty miles from St.
+ Joseph.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ As the sun was going down, we saw the first specimen of an animal known
+ familiarly over two thousand miles of mountain and desert&mdash;from
+ Kansas clear to the Pacific Ocean&mdash;as the "jackass rabbit." He is
+ well named. He is just like any other rabbit, except that he is from one
+ third to twice as large, has longer legs in proportion to his size, and
+ has the most preposterous ears that ever were mounted on any creature but
+ a jackass.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link032" id="link032"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="032.jpg (27K)" src="images/032.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When he is sitting quiet, thinking about his sins, or is absent-minded or
+ unapprehensive of danger, his majestic ears project above him
+ conspicuously; but the breaking of a twig will scare him nearly to death,
+ and then he tilts his ears back gently and starts for home. All you can
+ see, then, for the next minute, is his long gray form stretched out
+ straight and "streaking it" through the low sage-brush, head erect, eyes
+ right, and ears just canted a little to the rear, but showing you where
+ the animal is, all the time, the same as if he carried a jib. Now and then
+ he makes a marvelous spring with his long legs, high over the stunted
+ sage-brush, and scores a leap that would make a horse envious. Presently
+ he comes down to a long, graceful "lope," and shortly he mysteriously
+ disappears. He has crouched behind a sage-bush, and will sit there and
+ listen and tremble until you get within six feet of him, when he will get
+ under way again. But one must shoot at this creature once, if he wishes to
+ see him throw his heart into his heels, and do the best he knows how. He
+ is frightened clear through, now, and he lays his long ears down on his
+ back, straightens himself out like a yard-stick every spring he makes, and
+ scatters miles behind him with an easy indifference that is enchanting.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link033a" id="link033a"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="033a.jpg (35K)" src="images/033a.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Our party made this specimen "hump himself," as the conductor said. The
+ secretary started him with a shot from the Colt; I commenced spitting at
+ him with my weapon; and all in the same instant the old "Allen's" whole
+ broadside let go with a rattling crash, and it is not putting it too
+ strong to say that the rabbit was frantic! He dropped his ears, set up his
+ tail, and left for San Francisco at a speed which can only be described as
+ a flash and a vanish! Long after he was out of sight we could hear him
+ whiz.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I do not remember where we first came across "sage-brush," but as I have
+ been speaking of it I may as well describe it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This is easily done, for if the reader can imagine a gnarled and venerable
+ live oak-tree reduced to a little shrub two feet-high, with its rough
+ bark, its foliage, its twisted boughs, all complete, he can picture the
+ "sage-brush" exactly. Often, on lazy afternoons in the mountains, I have
+ lain on the ground with my face under a sage-bush, and entertained myself
+ with fancying that the gnats among its foliage were liliputian birds, and
+ that the ants marching and countermarching about its base were liliputian
+ flocks and herds, and myself some vast loafer from Brobdignag waiting to
+ catch a little citizen and eat him.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link033b" id="link033b"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="033b.jpg (30K)" src="images/033b.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It is an imposing monarch of the forest in exquisite miniature, is the
+ "sage-brush." Its foliage is a grayish green, and gives that tint to
+ desert and mountain. It smells like our domestic sage, and "sage-tea" made
+ from it taste like the sage-tea which all boys are so well acquainted
+ with. The sage-brush is a singularly hardy plant, and grows right in the
+ midst of deep sand, and among barren rocks, where nothing else in the
+ vegetable world would try to grow, except "bunch-grass."&mdash;["Bunch-grass"
+ grows on the bleak mountain-sides of Nevada and neighboring territories,
+ and offers excellent feed for stock, even in the dead of winter, wherever
+ the snow is blown aside and exposes it; notwithstanding its unpromising
+ home, bunch-grass is a better and more nutritious diet for cattle and
+ horses than almost any other hay or grass that is known&mdash;so stock-men
+ say.]&mdash;The sage-bushes grow from three to six or seven feet apart,
+ all over the mountains and deserts of the Far West, clear to the borders
+ of California. There is not a tree of any kind in the deserts, for
+ hundreds of miles&mdash;there is no vegetation at all in a regular desert,
+ except the sage-brush and its cousin the "greasewood," which is so much
+ like the sage-brush that the difference amounts to little. Camp-fires and
+ hot suppers in the deserts would be impossible but for the friendly
+ sage-brush. Its trunk is as large as a boy's wrist (and from that up to a
+ man's arm), and its crooked branches are half as large as its trunk&mdash;all
+ good, sound, hard wood, very like oak.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When a party camps, the first thing to be done is to cut sage-brush; and
+ in a few minutes there is an opulent pile of it ready for use. A hole a
+ foot wide, two feet deep, and two feet long, is dug, and sage-brush
+ chopped up and burned in it till it is full to the brim with glowing
+ coals. Then the cooking begins, and there is no smoke, and consequently no
+ swearing. Such a fire will keep all night, with very little replenishing;
+ and it makes a very sociable camp-fire, and one around which the most
+ impossible reminiscences sound plausible, instructive, and profoundly
+ entertaining.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Sage-brush is very fair fuel, but as a vegetable it is a distinguished
+ failure. Nothing can abide the taste of it but the jackass and his
+ illegitimate child the mule. But their testimony to its nutritiousness is
+ worth nothing, for they will eat pine knots, or anthracite coal, or brass
+ filings, or lead pipe, or old bottles, or anything that comes handy, and
+ then go off looking as grateful as if they had had oysters for dinner.
+ Mules and donkeys and camels have appetites that anything will relieve
+ temporarily, but nothing satisfy.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In Syria, once, at the head-waters of the Jordan, a camel took charge of
+ my overcoat while the tents were being pitched, and examined it with a
+ critical eye, all over, with as much interest as if he had an idea of
+ getting one made like it; and then, after he was done figuring on it as an
+ article of apparel, he began to contemplate it as an article of diet. He
+ put his foot on it, and lifted one of the sleeves out with his teeth, and
+ chewed and chewed at it, gradually taking it in, and all the while opening
+ and closing his eyes in a kind of religious ecstasy, as if he had never
+ tasted anything as good as an overcoat before, in his life. Then he
+ smacked his lips once or twice, and reached after the other sleeve. Next
+ he tried the velvet collar, and smiled a smile of such contentment that it
+ was plain to see that he regarded that as the daintiest thing about an
+ overcoat. The tails went next, along with some percussion caps and cough
+ candy, and some fig-paste from Constantinople.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link035" id="link035"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="035.jpg (95K)" src="images/035.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And then my newspaper correspondence dropped out, and he took a chance in
+ that&mdash;manuscript letters written for the home papers. But he was
+ treading on dangerous ground, now. He began to come across solid wisdom in
+ those documents that was rather weighty on his stomach; and occasionally
+ he would take a joke that would shake him up till it loosened his teeth;
+ it was getting to be perilous times with him, but he held his grip with
+ good courage and hopefully, till at last he began to stumble on statements
+ that not even a camel could swallow with impunity. He began to gag and
+ gasp, and his eyes to stand out, and his forelegs to spread, and in about
+ a quarter of a minute he fell over as stiff as a carpenter's work-bench,
+ and died a death of indescribable agony. I went and pulled the manuscript
+ out of his mouth, and found that the sensitive creature had choked to
+ death on one of the mildest and gentlest statements of fact that I ever
+ laid before a trusting public.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I was about to say, when diverted from my subject, that occasionally one
+ finds sage-bushes five or six feet high, and with a spread of branch and
+ foliage in proportion, but two or two and a half feet is the usual height.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch04" id="linkch04"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER IV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ As the sun went down and the evening chill came on, we made preparation
+ for bed. We stirred up the hard leather letter-sacks, and the knotty
+ canvas bags of printed matter (knotty and uneven because of projecting
+ ends and corners of magazines, boxes and books). We stirred them up and
+ redisposed them in such a way as to make our bed as level as possible. And
+ we did improve it, too, though after all our work it had an upheaved and
+ billowy look about it, like a little piece of a stormy sea. Next we hunted
+ up our boots from odd nooks among the mail-bags where they had settled,
+ and put them on. Then we got down our coats, vests, pantaloons and heavy
+ woolen shirts, from the arm-loops where they had been swinging all day,
+ and clothed ourselves in them&mdash;for, there being no ladies either at
+ the stations or in the coach, and the weather being hot, we had looked to
+ our comfort by stripping to our underclothing, at nine o'clock in the
+ morning. All things being now ready, we stowed the uneasy Dictionary where
+ it would lie as quiet as possible, and placed the water-canteens and
+ pistols where we could find them in the dark. Then we smoked a final pipe,
+ and swapped a final yarn; after which, we put the pipes, tobacco and bag
+ of coin in snug holes and caves among the mail-bags, and then fastened
+ down the coach curtains all around, and made the place as "dark as the
+ inside of a cow," as the conductor phrased it in his picturesque way. It
+ was certainly as dark as any place could be&mdash;nothing was even dimly
+ visible in it. And finally, we rolled ourselves up like silk- worms, each
+ person in his own blanket, and sank peacefully to sleep.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Whenever the stage stopped to change horses, we would wake up, and try to
+ recollect where we were&mdash;and succeed&mdash;and in a minute or two the
+ stage would be off again, and we likewise. We began to get into country,
+ now, threaded here and there with little streams. These had high, steep
+ banks on each side, and every time we flew down one bank and scrambled up
+ the other, our party inside got mixed somewhat. First we would all be down
+ in a pile at the forward end of the stage, nearly in a sitting posture,
+ and in a second we would shoot to the other end, and stand on our heads.
+ And we would sprawl and kick, too, and ward off ends and corners of mail-
+ bags that came lumbering over us and about us; and as the dust rose from
+ the tumult, we would all sneeze in chorus, and the majority of us would
+ grumble, and probably say some hasty thing, like: "Take your elbow out of
+ my ribs!&mdash;can't you quit crowding?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Every time we avalanched from one end of the stage to the other, the
+ Unabridged Dictionary would come too; and every time it came it damaged
+ somebody. One trip it "barked" the Secretary's elbow; the next trip it
+ hurt me in the stomach, and the third it tilted Bemis's nose up till he
+ could look down his nostrils&mdash;he said. The pistols and coin soon
+ settled to the bottom, but the pipes, pipe-stems, tobacco and canteens
+ clattered and floundered after the Dictionary every time it made an
+ assault on us, and aided and abetted the book by spilling tobacco in our
+ eyes, and water down our backs.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link038" id="link038"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="038.jpg (54K)" src="images/038.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Still, all things considered, it was a very comfortable night. It wore
+ gradually away, and when at last a cold gray light was visible through the
+ puckers and chinks in the curtains, we yawned and stretched with
+ satisfaction, shed our cocoons, and felt that we had slept as much as was
+ necessary. By and by, as the sun rose up and warmed the world, we pulled
+ off our clothes and got ready for breakfast. We were just pleasantly in
+ time, for five minutes afterward the driver sent the weird music of his
+ bugle winding over the grassy solitudes, and presently we detected a low
+ hut or two in the distance. Then the rattling of the coach, the clatter of
+ our six horses' hoofs, and the driver's crisp commands, awoke to a louder
+ and stronger emphasis, and we went sweeping down on the station at our
+ smartest speed. It was fascinating&mdash;that old overland stagecoaching.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We jumped out in undress uniform. The driver tossed his gathered reins out
+ on the ground, gaped and stretched complacently, drew off his heavy
+ buckskin gloves with great deliberation and insufferable dignity&mdash;taking
+ not the slightest notice of a dozen solicitous inquires after his health,
+ and humbly facetious and flattering accostings, and obsequious tenders of
+ service, from five or six hairy and half-civilized station-keepers and
+ hostlers who were nimbly unhitching our steeds and bringing the fresh team
+ out of the stables&mdash;for in the eyes of the stage-driver of that day,
+ station-keepers and hostlers were a sort of good enough low creatures,
+ useful in their place, and helping to make up a world, but not the kind of
+ beings which a person of distinction could afford to concern himself with;
+ while, on the contrary, in the eyes of the station-keeper and the hostler,
+ the stage-driver was a hero&mdash;a great and shining dignitary, the
+ world's favorite son, the envy of the people, the observed of the nations.
+ When they spoke to him they received his insolent silence meekly, and as
+ being the natural and proper conduct of so great a man; when he opened his
+ lips they all hung on his words with admiration (he never honored a
+ particular individual with a remark, but addressed it with a broad
+ generality to the horses, the stables, the surrounding country and the
+ human underlings); when he discharged a facetious insulting personality at
+ a hostler, that hostler was happy for the day; when he uttered his one
+ jest&mdash;old as the hills, coarse, profane, witless, and inflicted on
+ the same audience, in the same language, every time his coach drove up
+ there&mdash;the varlets roared, and slapped their thighs, and swore it was
+ the best thing they'd ever heard in all their lives. And how they would
+ fly around when he wanted a basin of water, a gourd of the same, or a
+ light for his pipe!&mdash;but they would instantly insult a passenger if
+ he so far forgot himself as to crave a favor at their hands. They could do
+ that sort of insolence as well as the driver they copied it from&mdash;for,
+ let it be borne in mind, the overland driver had but little less contempt
+ for his passengers than he had for his hostlers.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The hostlers and station-keepers treated the really powerful conductor of
+ the coach merely with the best of what was their idea of civility, but the
+ driver was the only being they bowed down to and worshipped. How
+ admiringly they would gaze up at him in his high seat as he gloved himself
+ with lingering deliberation, while some happy hostler held the bunch of
+ reins aloft, and waited patiently for him to take it! And how they would
+ bombard him with glorifying ejaculations as he cracked his long whip and
+ went careering away.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The station buildings were long, low huts, made of sundried, mud-colored
+ bricks, laid up without mortar (adobes, the Spaniards call these bricks,
+ and Americans shorten it to 'dobies). The roofs, which had no slant to
+ them worth speaking of, were thatched and then sodded or covered with a
+ thick layer of earth, and from this sprung a pretty rank growth of weeds
+ and grass. It was the first time we had ever seen a man's front yard on
+ top of his house. The building consisted of barns, stable-room for twelve
+ or fifteen horses, and a hut for an eating-room for passengers. This
+ latter had bunks in it for the station-keeper and a hostler or two. You
+ could rest your elbow on its eaves, and you had to bend in order to get in
+ at the door. In place of a window there was a square hole about large
+ enough for a man to crawl through, but this had no glass in it. There was
+ no flooring, but the ground was packed hard. There was no stove, but the
+ fire-place served all needful purposes. There were no shelves, no
+ cupboards, no closets. In a corner stood an open sack of flour, and
+ nestling against its base were a couple of black and venerable tin
+ coffee-pots, a tin teapot, a little bag of salt, and a side of bacon.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By the door of the station-keeper's den, outside, was a tin wash-basin, on
+ the ground. Near it was a pail of water and a piece of yellow bar soap,
+ and from the eaves hung a hoary blue woolen shirt, significantly&mdash;but
+ this latter was the station-keeper's private towel, and only two persons
+ in all the party might venture to use it&mdash;the stage-driver and the
+ conductor. The latter would not, from a sense of decency; the former would
+ not, because did not choose to encourage the advances of a station-
+ keeper. We had towels&mdash;in the valise; they might as well have been in
+ Sodom and Gomorrah. We (and the conductor) used our handkerchiefs, and the
+ driver his pantaloons and sleeves. By the door, inside, was fastened a
+ small old-fashioned looking-glass frame, with two little fragments of the
+ original mirror lodged down in one corner of it. This arrangement afforded
+ a pleasant double-barreled portrait of you when you looked into it, with
+ one half of your head set up a couple of inches above the other half. From
+ the glass frame hung the half of a comb by a string&mdash;but if I had to
+ describe that patriarch or die, I believe I would order some sample
+ coffins.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link041" id="link041"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="041.jpg (47K)" src="images/041.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="link042a" id="link042a"></a>
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="042a.jpg (11K)" src="images/042a.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It had come down from Esau and Samson, and had been accumulating hair ever
+ since&mdash;along with certain impurities. In one corner of the room stood
+ three or four rifles and muskets, together with horns and pouches of
+ ammunition. The station-men wore pantaloons of coarse, country-woven
+ stuff, and into the seat and the inside of the legs were sewed ample
+ additions of buckskin, to do duty in place of leggings, when the man rode
+ horseback&mdash;so the pants were half dull blue and half yellow, and
+ unspeakably picturesque. The pants were stuffed into the tops of high
+ boots, the heels whereof were armed with great Spanish spurs, whose little
+ iron clogs and chains jingled with every step. The man wore a huge beard
+ and mustachios, an old slouch hat, a blue woolen shirt, no suspenders, no
+ vest, no coat&mdash;in a leathern sheath in his belt, a great long "navy"
+ revolver (slung on right side, hammer to the front), and projecting from
+ his boot a horn-handled bowie-knife.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link042b" id="link042b"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="042b.jpg (42K)" src="images/042b.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The furniture of the hut was neither gorgeous nor much in the way. The
+ rocking-chairs and sofas were not present, and never had been, but they
+ were represented by two three-legged stools, a pine-board bench four feet
+ long, and two empty candle-boxes. The table was a greasy board on stilts,
+ and the table- cloth and napkins had not come&mdash;and they were not
+ looking for them, either. A battered tin platter, a knife and fork, and a
+ tin pint cup, were at each man's place, and the driver had a queens-ware
+ saucer that had seen better days. Of course this duke sat at the head of
+ the table. There was one isolated piece of table furniture that bore about
+ it a touching air of grandeur in misfortune. This was the caster. It was
+ German silver, and crippled and rusty, but it was so preposterously out of
+ place there that it was suggestive of a tattered exiled king among
+ barbarians, and the majesty of its native position compelled respect even
+ in its degradation.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There was only one cruet left, and that was a stopperless, fly-specked,
+ broken-necked thing, with two inches of vinegar in it, and a dozen
+ preserved flies with their heels up and looking sorry they had invested
+ there.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link043" id="link043"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="043.jpg (23K)" src="images/043.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The station-keeper upended a disk of last week's bread, of the shape and
+ size of an old-time cheese, and carved some slabs from it which were as
+ good as Nicholson pavement, and tenderer.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He sliced off a piece of bacon for each man, but only the experienced old
+ hands made out to eat it, for it was condemned army bacon which the United
+ States would not feed to its soldiers in the forts, and the stage company
+ had bought it cheap for the sustenance of their passengers and employees.
+ We may have found this condemned army bacon further out on the plains than
+ the section I am locating it in, but we found it&mdash;there is no
+ gainsaying that.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then he poured for us a beverage which he called "Slum gullion," and it is
+ hard to think he was not inspired when he named it. It really pretended to
+ be tea, but there was too much dish-rag, and sand, and old bacon-rind in
+ it to deceive the intelligent traveler.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link044" id="link044"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="044.jpg (64K)" src="images/044.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He had no sugar and no milk&mdash;not even a spoon to stir the ingredients
+ with.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We could not eat the bread or the meat, nor drink the "slumgullion." And
+ when I looked at that melancholy vinegar-cruet, I thought of the anecdote
+ (a very, very old one, even at that day) of the traveler who sat down to a
+ table which had nothing on it but a mackerel and a pot of mustard. He
+ asked the landlord if this was all. The landlord said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "All! Why, thunder and lightning, I should think there was mackerel enough
+ there for six."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "But I don't like mackerel."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh&mdash;then help yourself to the mustard."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In other days I had considered it a good, a very good, anecdote, but there
+ was a dismal plausibility about it, here, that took all the humor out of
+ it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Our breakfast was before us, but our teeth were idle.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I tasted and smelt, and said I would take coffee, I believed. The
+ station-boss stopped dead still, and glared at me speechless. At last,
+ when he came to, he turned away and said, as one who communes with himself
+ upon a matter too vast to grasp:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Coffee! Well, if that don't go clean ahead of me, I'm d&mdash;-d!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link045" id="link045"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="045.jpg (40K)" src="images/045.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We could not eat, and there was no conversation among the hostlers and
+ herdsmen&mdash;we all sat at the same board. At least there was no
+ conversation further than a single hurried request, now and then, from one
+ employee to another. It was always in the same form, and always gruffly
+ friendly. Its western freshness and novelty startled me, at first, and
+ interested me; but it presently grew monotonous, and lost its charm. It
+ was:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Pass the bread, you son of a skunk!" No, I forget&mdash;skunk was not the
+ word; it seems to me it was still stronger than that; I know it was, in
+ fact, but it is gone from my memory, apparently. However, it is no matter&mdash;probably
+ it was too strong for print, anyway. It is the landmark in my memory which
+ tells me where I first encountered the vigorous new vernacular of the
+ occidental plains and mountains.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We gave up the breakfast, and paid our dollar apiece and went back to our
+ mail-bag bed in the coach, and found comfort in our pipes. Right here we
+ suffered the first diminution of our princely state. We left our six fine
+ horses and took six mules in their place. But they were wild Mexican
+ fellows, and a man had to stand at the head of each of them and hold him
+ fast while the driver gloved and got himself ready. And when at last he
+ grasped the reins and gave the word, the men sprung suddenly away from the
+ mules' heads and the coach shot from the station as if it had issued from
+ a cannon. How the frantic animals did scamper! It was a fierce and furious
+ gallop&mdash;and the gait never altered for a moment till we reeled off
+ ten or twelve miles and swept up to the next collection of little
+ station-huts and stables.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So we flew along all day. At 2 P.M. the belt of timber that fringes the
+ North Platte and marks its windings through the vast level floor of the
+ Plains came in sight. At 4 P.M. we crossed a branch of the river, and at 5
+ P.M. we crossed the Platte itself, and landed at Fort Kearney, fifty-six
+ hours out from St. Joe&mdash;THREE HUNDRED MILES!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Now that was stage-coaching on the great overland, ten or twelve years
+ ago, when perhaps not more than ten men in America, all told, expected to
+ live to see a railroad follow that route to the Pacific. But the railroad
+ is there, now, and it pictures a thousand odd comparisons and contrasts in
+ my mind to read the following sketch, in the New York Times, of a recent
+ trip over almost the very ground I have been describing. I can scarcely
+ comprehend the new state of things:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "ACROSS THE CONTINENT.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "At 4.20 P.M., Sunday, we rolled out of the station at Omaha, and
+ started westward on our long jaunt. A couple of hours out, dinner was
+ announced&mdash;an "event" to those of us who had yet to experience what
+ it is to eat in one of Pullman's hotels on wheels; so, stepping into the
+ car next forward of our sleeping palace, we found ourselves in the
+ dining-car. It was a revelation to us, that first dinner on Sunday. And
+ though we continued to dine for four days, and had as many breakfasts
+ and suppers, our whole party never ceased to admire the perfection of
+ the arrangements, and the marvelous results achieved. Upon tables
+ covered with snowy linen, and garnished with services of solid silver,
+ Ethiop waiters, flitting about in spotless white, placed as by magic a
+ repast at which Delmonico himself could have had no occasion to blush;
+ and, indeed, in some respects it would be hard for that distinguished
+ chef to match our menu; for, in addition to all that ordinarily makes up
+ a first-chop dinner, had we not our antelope steak (the gormand who has
+ not experienced this&mdash;bah! what does he know of the feast of fat
+ things?) our delicious mountain-brook trout, and choice fruits and
+ berries, and (sauce piquant and unpurchasable!) our sweet-scented,
+ appetite-compelling air of the prairies?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link047" id="link047"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="047.jpg (88K)" src="images/047.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You may depend upon it, we all did justice to the good things, and as
+ we washed them down with bumpers of sparkling Krug, whilst we sped along
+ at the rate of thirty miles an hour, agreed it was the fastest living we
+ had ever experienced. (We beat that, however, two days afterward when we
+ made twenty-seven miles in twenty-seven minutes, while our Champagne
+ glasses filled to the brim spilled not a drop!) After dinner we repaired
+ to our drawing-room car, and, as it was Sabbath eve, intoned some of the
+ grand old hymns&mdash;"Praise God from whom," etc.; "Shining Shore,"
+ "Coronation," etc.&mdash;the voices of the men singers and of the women
+ singers blending sweetly in the evening air, while our train, with its
+ great, glaring Polyphemus eye, lighting up long vistas of prairie,
+ rushed into the night and the Wild. Then to bed in luxurious couches,
+ where we slept the sleep of the just and only awoke the next morning
+ (Monday) at eight o'clock, to find ourselves at the crossing of the
+ North Platte, three hundred miles from Omaha&mdash;fifteen hours and
+ forty minutes out."
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch05" id="linkch05"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER V.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Another night of alternate tranquillity and turmoil. But morning came, by
+ and by. It was another glad awakening to fresh breezes, vast expanses of
+ level greensward, bright sunlight, an impressive solitude utterly without
+ visible human beings or human habitations, and an atmosphere of such
+ amazing magnifying properties that trees that seemed close at hand were
+ more than three mile away. We resumed undress uniform, climbed a-top of
+ the flying coach, dangled our legs over the side, shouted occasionally at
+ our frantic mules, merely to see them lay their ears back and scamper
+ faster, tied our hats on to keep our hair from blowing away, and leveled
+ an outlook over the world-wide carpet about us for things new and strange
+ to gaze at. Even at this day it thrills me through and through to think of
+ the life, the gladness and the wild sense of freedom that used to make the
+ blood dance in my veins on those fine overland mornings!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link049" id="link049"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="049.jpg (43K)" src="images/049.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link050" id="link050"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="050.jpg (51K)" src="images/050.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Along about an hour after breakfast we saw the first prairie-dog villages,
+ the first antelope, and the first wolf. If I remember rightly, this latter
+ was the regular cayote (pronounced ky-o-te) of the farther deserts. And if
+ it was, he was not a pretty creature or respectable either, for I got well
+ acquainted with his race afterward, and can speak with confidence. The
+ cayote is a long, slim, sick and sorry-looking skeleton, with a gray
+ wolf-skin stretched over it, a tolerably bushy tail that forever sags down
+ with a despairing expression of forsakenness and misery, a furtive and
+ evil eye, and a long, sharp face, with slightly lifted lip and exposed
+ teeth. He has a general slinking expression all over. The cayote is a
+ living, breathing allegory of Want. He is always hungry.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He is always poor, out of luck and friendless. The meanest creatures
+ despise him, and even the fleas would desert him for a velocipede. He is
+ so spiritless and cowardly that even while his exposed teeth are
+ pretending a threat, the rest of his face is apologizing for it. And he is
+ so homely!&mdash;so scrawny, and ribby, and coarse-haired, and pitiful.
+ When he sees you he lifts his lip and lets a flash of his teeth out, and
+ then turns a little out of the course he was pursuing, depresses his head
+ a bit, and strikes a long, soft-footed trot through the sage-brush,
+ glancing over his shoulder at you, from time to time, till he is about out
+ of easy pistol range, and then he stops and takes a deliberate survey of
+ you; he will trot fifty yards and stop again&mdash;another fifty and stop
+ again; and finally the gray of his gliding body blends with the gray of
+ the sage-brush, and he disappears. All this is when you make no
+ demonstration against him; but if you do, he develops a livelier interest
+ in his journey, and instantly electrifies his heels and puts such a deal
+ of real estate between himself and your weapon, that by the time you have
+ raised the hammer you see that you need a minie rifle, and by the time you
+ have got him in line you need a rifled cannon, and by the time you have
+ "drawn a bead" on him you see well enough that nothing but an unusually
+ long-winded streak of lightning could reach him where he is now. But if
+ you start a swift-footed dog after him, you will enjoy it ever so much&mdash;especially
+ if it is a dog that has a good opinion of himself, and has been brought up
+ to think he knows something about speed.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link051" id="link051"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="051.jpg (42K)" src="images/051.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The cayote will go swinging gently off on that deceitful trot of his, and
+ every little while he will smile a fraudful smile over his shoulder that
+ will fill that dog entirely full of encouragement and worldly ambition,
+ and make him lay his head still lower to the ground, and stretch his neck
+ further to the front, and pant more fiercely, and stick his tail out
+ straighter behind, and move his furious legs with a yet wilder frenzy, and
+ leave a broader and broader, and higher and denser cloud of desert sand
+ smoking behind, and marking his long wake across the level plain! And all
+ this time the dog is only a short twenty feet behind the cayote, and to
+ save the soul of him he cannot understand why it is that he cannot get
+ perceptibly closer; and he begins to get aggravated, and it makes him
+ madder and madder to see how gently the cayote glides along and never
+ pants or sweats or ceases to smile; and he grows still more and more
+ incensed to see how shamefully he has been taken in by an entire stranger,
+ and what an ignoble swindle that long, calm, soft-footed trot is; and next
+ he notices that he is getting fagged, and that the cayote actually has to
+ slacken speed a little to keep from running away from him&mdash;and then
+ that town-dog is mad in earnest, and he begins to strain and weep and
+ swear, and paw the sand higher than ever, and reach for the cayote with
+ concentrated and desperate energy. This "spurt" finds him six feet behind
+ the gliding enemy, and two miles from his friends. And then, in the
+ instant that a wild new hope is lighting up his face, the cayote turns and
+ smiles blandly upon him once more, and with a something about it which
+ seems to say: "Well, I shall have to tear myself away from you, bub&mdash;business
+ is business, and it will not do for me to be fooling along this way all
+ day"&mdash;and forthwith there is a rushing sound, and the sudden
+ splitting of a long crack through the atmosphere, and behold that dog is
+ solitary and alone in the midst of a vast solitude!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It makes his head swim. He stops, and looks all around; climbs the nearest
+ sand-mound, and gazes into the distance; shakes his head reflectively, and
+ then, without a word, he turns and jogs along back to his train, and takes
+ up a humble position under the hindmost wagon, and feels unspeakably mean,
+ and looks ashamed, and hangs his tail at half- mast for a week. And for as
+ much as a year after that, whenever there is a great hue and cry after a
+ cayote, that dog will merely glance in that direction without emotion, and
+ apparently observe to himself, "I believe I do not wish any of the pie."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link052" id="link052"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="052.jpg (145K)" src="images/052.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The cayote lives chiefly in the most desolate and forbidding desert, along
+ with the lizard, the jackass-rabbit and the raven, and gets an uncertain
+ and precarious living, and earns it. He seems to subsist almost wholly on
+ the carcases of oxen, mules and horses that have dropped out of emigrant
+ trains and died, and upon windfalls of carrion, and occasional legacies of
+ offal bequeathed to him by white men who have been opulent enough to have
+ something better to butcher than condemned army bacon.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He will eat anything in the world that his first cousins, the desert-
+ frequenting tribes of Indians will, and they will eat anything they can
+ bite. It is a curious fact that these latter are the only creatures known
+ to history who will eat nitro-glycerine and ask for more if they survive.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The cayote of the deserts beyond the Rocky Mountains has a peculiarly hard
+ time of it, owing to the fact that his relations, the Indians, are just as
+ apt to be the first to detect a seductive scent on the desert breeze, and
+ follow the fragrance to the late ox it emanated from, as he is himself;
+ and when this occurs he has to content himself with sitting off at a
+ little distance watching those people strip off and dig out everything
+ edible, and walk off with it. Then he and the waiting ravens explore the
+ skeleton and polish the bones. It is considered that the cayote, and the
+ obscene bird, and the Indian of the desert, testify their blood kinship
+ with each other in that they live together in the waste places of the
+ earth on terms of perfect confidence and friendship, while hating all
+ other creature and yearning to assist at their funerals. He does not mind
+ going a hundred miles to breakfast, and a hundred and fifty to dinner,
+ because he is sure to have three or four days between meals, and he can
+ just as well be traveling and looking at the scenery as lying around doing
+ nothing and adding to the burdens of his parents.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We soon learned to recognize the sharp, vicious bark of the cayote as it
+ came across the murky plain at night to disturb our dreams among the
+ mail-sacks; and remembering his forlorn aspect and his hard fortune, made
+ shift to wish him the blessed novelty of a long day's good luck and a
+ limitless larder the morrow.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch06" id="linkch06"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER VI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Our new conductor (just shipped) had been without sleep for twenty hours.
+ Such a thing was very frequent. From St. Joseph, Missouri, to Sacramento,
+ California, by stage-coach, was nearly nineteen hundred miles, and the
+ trip was often made in fifteen days (the cars do it in four and a half,
+ now), but the time specified in the mail contracts, and required by the
+ schedule, was eighteen or nineteen days, if I remember rightly. This was
+ to make fair allowance for winter storms and snows, and other unavoidable
+ causes of detention. The stage company had everything under strict
+ discipline and good system. Over each two hundred and fifty miles of road
+ they placed an agent or superintendent, and invested him with great
+ authority. His beat or jurisdiction of two hundred and fifty miles was
+ called a "division." He purchased horses, mules harness, and food for men
+ and beasts, and distributed these things among his stage stations, from
+ time to time, according to his judgment of what each station needed. He
+ erected station buildings and dug wells. He attended to the paying of the
+ station-keepers, hostlers, drivers and blacksmiths, and discharged them
+ whenever he chose. He was a very, very great man in his "division"&mdash;a
+ kind of Grand Mogul, a Sultan of the Indies, in whose presence common men
+ were modest of speech and manner, and in the glare of whose greatness even
+ the dazzling stage-driver dwindled to a penny dip. There were about eight
+ of these kings, all told, on the overland route.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link055" id="link055"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="055.jpg (39K)" src="images/055.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next in rank and importance to the division-agent came the "conductor."
+ His beat was the same length as the agent's&mdash;two hundred and fifty
+ miles. He sat with the driver, and (when necessary) rode that fearful
+ distance, night and day, without other rest or sleep than what he could
+ get perched thus on top of the flying vehicle. Think of it! He had
+ absolute charge of the mails, express matter, passengers and stage, coach,
+ until he delivered them to the next conductor, and got his receipt for
+ them.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Consequently he had to be a man of intelligence, decision and considerable
+ executive ability. He was usually a quiet, pleasant man, who attended
+ closely to his duties, and was a good deal of a gentleman. It was not
+ absolutely necessary that the division-agent should be a gentleman, and
+ occasionally he wasn't. But he was always a general in administrative
+ ability, and a bull-dog in courage and determination&mdash;otherwise the
+ chieftainship over the lawless underlings of the overland service would
+ never in any instance have been to him anything but an equivalent for a
+ month of insolence and distress and a bullet and a coffin at the end of
+ it. There were about sixteen or eighteen conductors on the overland, for
+ there was a daily stage each way, and a conductor on every stage.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next in real and official rank and importance, after the conductor, came
+ my delight, the driver&mdash;next in real but not in apparent importance&mdash;for
+ we have seen that in the eyes of the common herd the driver was to the
+ conductor as an admiral is to the captain of the flag-ship. The driver's
+ beat was pretty long, and his sleeping-time at the stations pretty short,
+ sometimes; and so, but for the grandeur of his position his would have
+ been a sorry life, as well as a hard and a wearing one. We took a new
+ driver every day or every night (for they drove backward and forward over
+ the same piece of road all the time), and therefore we never got as well
+ acquainted with them as we did with the conductors; and besides, they
+ would have been above being familiar with such rubbish as passengers,
+ anyhow, as a general thing. Still, we were always eager to get a sight of
+ each and every new driver as soon as the watch changed, for each and every
+ day we were either anxious to get rid of an unpleasant one, or loath to
+ part with a driver we had learned to like and had come to be sociable and
+ friendly with. And so the first question we asked the conductor whenever
+ we got to where we were to exchange drivers, was always, "Which is him?"
+ The grammar was faulty, maybe, but we could not know, then, that it would
+ go into a book some day. As long as everything went smoothly, the overland
+ driver was well enough situated, but if a fellow driver got sick suddenly
+ it made trouble, for the coach must go on, and so the potentate who was
+ about to climb down and take a luxurious rest after his long night's siege
+ in the midst of wind and rain and darkness, had to stay where he was and
+ do the sick man's work. Once, in the Rocky Mountains, when I found a
+ driver sound asleep on the box, and the mules going at the usual
+ break-neck pace, the conductor said never mind him, there was no danger,
+ and he was doing double duty&mdash;had driven seventy-five miles on one
+ coach, and was now going back over it on this without rest or sleep. A
+ hundred and fifty miles of holding back of six vindictive mules and
+ keeping them from climbing the trees! It sounds incredible, but I remember
+ the statement well enough.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The station-keepers, hostlers, etc., were low, rough characters, as
+ already described; and from western Nebraska to Nevada a considerable
+ sprinkling of them might be fairly set down as outlaws&mdash;fugitives
+ from justice, criminals whose best security was a section of country which
+ was without law and without even the pretence of it. When the "division-
+ agent" issued an order to one of these parties he did it with the full
+ understanding that he might have to enforce it with a navy six-shooter,
+ and so he always went "fixed" to make things go along smoothly.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Now and then a division-agent was really obliged to shoot a hostler
+ through the head to teach him some simple matter that he could have taught
+ him with a club if his circumstances and surroundings had been different.
+ But they were snappy, able men, those division-agents, and when they tried
+ to teach a subordinate anything, that subordinate generally "got it
+ through his head."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link057" id="link057"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="057.jpg (53K)" src="images/057.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A great portion of this vast machinery&mdash;these hundreds of men and
+ coaches, and thousands of mules and horses&mdash;was in the hands of Mr.
+ Ben Holliday. All the western half of the business was in his hands. This
+ reminds me of an incident of Palestine travel which is pertinent here, so
+ I will transfer it just in the language in which I find it set down in my
+ Holy Land note-book:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ No doubt everybody has heard of Ben Holliday&mdash;a man of prodigious
+ energy, who used to send mails and passengers flying across the
+ continent in his overland stage-coaches like a very whirlwind&mdash;two
+ thousand long miles in fifteen days and a half, by the watch! But this
+ fragment of history is not about Ben Holliday, but about a young New
+ York boy by the name of Jack, who traveled with our small party of
+ pilgrims in the Holy Land (and who had traveled to California in Mr.
+ Holliday's overland coaches three years before, and had by no means
+ forgotten it or lost his gushing admiration of Mr. H.) Aged nineteen.
+ Jack was a good boy&mdash;a good-hearted and always well-meaning boy,
+ who had been reared in the city of New York, and although he was bright
+ and knew a great many useful things, his Scriptural education had been a
+ good deal neglected&mdash;to such a degree, indeed, that all Holy Land
+ history was fresh and new to him, and all Bible names mysteries that had
+ never disturbed his virgin ear.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Also in our party was an elderly pilgrim who was the reverse of Jack, in
+ that he was learned in the Scriptures and an enthusiast concerning them.
+ He was our encyclopedia, and we were never tired of listening to his
+ speeches, nor he of making them. He never passed a celebrated locality,
+ from Bashan to Bethlehem, without illuminating it with an oration. One
+ day, when camped near the ruins of Jericho, he burst forth with
+ something like this:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Jack, do you see that range of mountains over yonder that bounds the
+ Jordan valley? The mountains of Moab, Jack! Think of it, my boy&mdash;the
+ actual mountains of Moab&mdash;renowned in Scripture history! We are
+ actually standing face to face with those illustrious crags and peaks&mdash;and
+ for all we know" [dropping his voice impressively], "our eyes may be
+ resting at this very moment upon the spot WHERE LIES THE MYSTERIOUS
+ GRAVE OF MOSES! Think of it, Jack!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Moses who?" (falling inflection).
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link058" id="link058"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="058.jpg (62K)" src="images/058.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Moses who! Jack, you ought to be ashamed of yourself&mdash;you ought to
+ be ashamed of such criminal ignorance. Why, Moses, the great guide,
+ soldier, poet, lawgiver of ancient Israel! Jack, from this spot where we
+ stand, to Egypt, stretches a fearful desert three hundred miles in
+ extent&mdash;and across that desert that wonderful man brought the
+ children of Israel!&mdash;guiding them with unfailing sagacity for forty
+ years over the sandy desolation and among the obstructing rocks and
+ hills, and landed them at last, safe and sound, within sight of this
+ very spot; and where we now stand they entered the Promised Land with
+ anthems of rejoicing! It was a wonderful, wonderful thing to do, Jack!
+ Think of it!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Forty years? Only three hundred miles? Humph! Ben Holliday would have
+ fetched them through in thirty-six hours!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The boy meant no harm. He did not know that he had said anything that
+ was wrong or irreverent. And so no one scolded him or felt offended with
+ him&mdash;and nobody could but some ungenerous spirit incapable of
+ excusing the heedless blunders of a boy.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ At noon on the fifth day out, we arrived at the "Crossing of the South
+ Platte," alias "Julesburg," alias "Overland City," four hundred and
+ seventy miles from St. Joseph&mdash;the strangest, quaintest, funniest
+ frontier town that our untraveled eyes had ever stared at and been
+ astonished with.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch07" id="linkch07"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER VII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It did seem strange enough to see a town again after what appeared to us
+ such a long acquaintance with deep, still, almost lifeless and houseless
+ solitude! We tumbled out into the busy street feeling like meteoric people
+ crumbled off the corner of some other world, and wakened up suddenly in
+ this. For an hour we took as much interest in Overland City as if we had
+ never seen a town before. The reason we had an hour to spare was because
+ we had to change our stage (for a less sumptuous affair, called a
+ "mud-wagon") and transfer our freight of mails.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Presently we got under way again. We came to the shallow, yellow, muddy
+ South Platte, with its low banks and its scattering flat sand-bars and
+ pigmy islands&mdash;a melancholy stream straggling through the centre of
+ the enormous flat plain, and only saved from being impossible to find with
+ the naked eye by its sentinel rank of scattering trees standing on either
+ bank. The Platte was "up," they said&mdash;which made me wish I could see
+ it when it was down, if it could look any sicker and sorrier. They said it
+ was a dangerous stream to cross, now, because its quicksands were liable
+ to swallow up horses, coach and passengers if an attempt was made to ford
+ it. But the mails had to go, and we made the attempt. Once or twice in
+ midstream the wheels sunk into the yielding sands so threateningly that we
+ half believed we had dreaded and avoided the sea all our lives to be
+ shipwrecked in a "mud-wagon" in the middle of a desert at last. But we
+ dragged through and sped away toward the setting sun.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link061" id="link061"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="061.jpg (69K)" src="images/061.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ Next morning, just before dawn, when about five hundred and fifty miles
+ from St. Joseph, our mud-wagon broke down. We were to be delayed five or
+ six hours, and therefore we took horses, by invitation, and joined a party
+ who were just starting on a buffalo hunt. It was noble sport galloping
+ over the plain in the dewy freshness of the morning, but our part of the
+ hunt ended in disaster and disgrace, for a wounded buffalo bull chased the
+ passenger Bemis nearly two miles, and then he forsook his horse and took
+ to a lone tree. He was very sullen about the matter for some twenty-four
+ hours, but at last he began to soften little by little, and finally he
+ said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link062" id="link062"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="062.jpg (81K)" src="images/062.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, it was not funny, and there was no sense in those gawks making
+ themselves so facetious over it. I tell you I was angry in earnest for
+ awhile. I should have shot that long gangly lubber they called Hank, if I
+ could have done it without crippling six or seven other people&mdash;but
+ of course I couldn't, the old 'Allen's' so confounded comprehensive. I
+ wish those loafers had been up in the tree; they wouldn't have wanted to
+ laugh so. If I had had a horse worth a cent&mdash;but no, the minute he
+ saw that buffalo bull wheel on him and give a bellow, he raised straight
+ up in the air and stood on his heels. The saddle began to slip, and I took
+ him round the neck and laid close to him, and began to pray. Then he came
+ down and stood up on the other end awhile, and the bull actually stopped
+ pawing sand and bellowing to contemplate the inhuman spectacle.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Then the bull made a pass at him and uttered a bellow that sounded
+ perfectly frightful, it was so close to me, and that seemed to literally
+ prostrate my horse's reason, and make a raving distracted maniac of him,
+ and I wish I may die if he didn't stand on his head for a quarter of a
+ minute and shed tears. He was absolutely out of his mind&mdash;he was, as
+ sure as truth itself, and he really didn't know what he was doing. Then
+ the bull came charging at us, and my horse dropped down on all fours and
+ took a fresh start&mdash;and then for the next ten minutes he would
+ actually throw one hand-spring after another so fast that the bull began
+ to get unsettled, too, and didn't know where to start in&mdash;and so he
+ stood there sneezing, and shovelling dust over his back, and bellowing
+ every now and then, and thinking he had got a fifteen-hundred dollar
+ circus horse for breakfast, certain. Well, I was first out on his neck&mdash;the
+ horse's, not the bull's&mdash;and then underneath, and next on his rump,
+ and sometimes head up, and sometimes heels&mdash;but I tell you it seemed
+ solemn and awful to be ripping and tearing and carrying on so in the
+ presence of death, as you might say. Pretty soon the bull made a snatch
+ for us and brought away some of my horse's tail (I suppose, but do not
+ know, being pretty busy at the time), but something made him hungry for
+ solitude and suggested to him to get up and hunt for it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link063" id="link063"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="063.jpg (63K)" src="images/063.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "And then you ought to have seen that spider legged old skeleton go! and
+ you ought to have seen the bull cut out after him, too&mdash;head down,
+ tongue out, tail up, bellowing like everything, and actually mowing down
+ the weeds, and tearing up the earth, and boosting up the sand like a
+ whirlwind! By George, it was a hot race! I and the saddle were back on the
+ rump, and I had the bridle in my teeth and holding on to the pommel with
+ both hands. First we left the dogs behind; then we passed a jackass
+ rabbit; then we overtook a cayote, and were gaining on an antelope when
+ the rotten girth let go and threw me about thirty yards off to the left,
+ and as the saddle went down over the horse's rump he gave it a lift with
+ his heels that sent it more than four hundred yards up in the air, I wish
+ I may die in a minute if he didn't. I fell at the foot of the only
+ solitary tree there was in nine counties adjacent (as any creature could
+ see with the naked eye), and the next second I had hold of the bark with
+ four sets of nails and my teeth, and the next second after that I was
+ astraddle of the main limb and blaspheming my luck in a way that made my
+ breath smell of brimstone. I had the bull, now, if he did not think of one
+ thing. But that one thing I dreaded. I dreaded it very seriously. There
+ was a possibility that the bull might not think of it, but there were
+ greater chances that he would. I made up my mind what I would do in case
+ he did. It was a little over forty feet to the ground from where I sat. I
+ cautiously unwound the lariat from the pommel of my saddle&mdash;&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Your saddle? Did you take your saddle up in the tree with you?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Take it up in the tree with me? Why, how you talk. Of course I didn't. No
+ man could do that. It fell in the tree when it came down."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh&mdash;exactly."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Certainly. I unwound the lariat, and fastened one end of it to the limb.
+ It was the very best green raw-hide, and capable of sustaining tons. I
+ made a slip-noose in the other end, and then hung it down to see the
+ length. It reached down twenty-two feet&mdash;half way to the ground. I
+ then loaded every barrel of the Allen with a double charge. I felt
+ satisfied. I said to myself, if he never thinks of that one thing that I
+ dread, all right&mdash;but if he does, all right anyhow&mdash;I am fixed
+ for him. But don't you know that the very thing a man dreads is the thing
+ that always happens? Indeed it is so. I watched the bull, now, with
+ anxiety&mdash;anxiety which no one can conceive of who has not been in
+ such a situation and felt that at any moment death might come. Presently a
+ thought came into the bull's eye. I knew it! said I&mdash;if my nerve
+ fails now, I am lost. Sure enough, it was just as I had dreaded, he
+ started in to climb the tree&mdash;&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "What, the bull?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Of course&mdash;who else?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "But a bull can't climb a tree."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link065" id="link065"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="065.jpg (75K)" src="images/065.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "He can't, can't he? Since you know so much about it, did you ever see a
+ bull try?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No! I never dreamt of such a thing."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, then, what is the use of your talking that way, then? Because you
+ never saw a thing done, is that any reason why it can't be done?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, all right&mdash;go on. What did you do?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "The bull started up, and got along well for about ten feet, then slipped
+ and slid back. I breathed easier. He tried it again&mdash;got up a little
+ higher&mdash;slipped again. But he came at it once more, and this time he
+ was careful. He got gradually higher and higher, and my spirits went down
+ more and more. Up he came&mdash;an inch at a time&mdash;with his eyes hot,
+ and his tongue hanging out. Higher and higher&mdash;hitched his foot over
+ the stump of a limb, and looked up, as much as to say, 'You are my meat,
+ friend.' Up again&mdash;higher and higher, and getting more excited the
+ closer he got. He was within ten feet of me! I took a long breath,&mdash;and
+ then said I, 'It is now or never.' I had the coil of the lariat all ready;
+ I paid it out slowly, till it hung right over his head; all of a sudden I
+ let go of the slack, and the slipnoose fell fairly round his neck! Quicker
+ than lightning I out with the Allen and let him have it in the face. It
+ was an awful roar, and must have scared the bull out of his senses. When
+ the smoke cleared away, there he was, dangling in the air, twenty foot
+ from the ground, and going out of one convulsion into another faster than
+ you could count! I didn't stop to count, anyhow&mdash;I shinned down the
+ tree and shot for home."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Bemis, is all that true, just as you have stated it?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I wish I may rot in my tracks and die the death of a dog if it isn't."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, we can't refuse to believe it, and we don't. But if there were some
+ proofs&mdash;&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Proofs! Did I bring back my lariat?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Did I bring back my horse?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Did you ever see the bull again?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, then, what more do you want? I never saw anybody as particular as
+ you are about a little thing like that."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I made up my mind that if this man was not a liar he only missed it by the
+ skin of his teeth. This episode reminds me of an incident of my brief
+ sojourn in Siam, years afterward. The European citizens of a town in the
+ neighborhood of Bangkok had a prodigy among them by the name of Eckert, an
+ Englishman&mdash;a person famous for the number, ingenuity and imposing
+ magnitude of his lies. They were always repeating his most celebrated
+ falsehoods, and always trying to "draw him out" before strangers; but they
+ seldom succeeded. Twice he was invited to the house where I was visiting,
+ but nothing could seduce him into a specimen lie. One day a planter named
+ Bascom, an influential man, and a proud and sometimes irascible one,
+ invited me to ride over with him and call on Eckert. As we jogged along,
+ said he:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Now, do you know where the fault lies? It lies in putting Eckert on his
+ guard. The minute the boys go to pumping at Eckert he knows perfectly well
+ what they are after, and of course he shuts up his shell. Anybody might
+ know he would. But when we get there, we must play him finer than that.
+ Let him shape the conversation to suit himself&mdash;let him drop it or
+ change it whenever he wants to. Let him see that nobody is trying to draw
+ him out. Just let him have his own way. He will soon forget himself and
+ begin to grind out lies like a mill. Don't get impatient&mdash;just keep
+ quiet, and let me play him. I will make him lie. It does seem to me that
+ the boys must be blind to overlook such an obvious and simple trick as
+ that."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Eckert received us heartily&mdash;a pleasant-spoken, gentle-mannered
+ creature. We sat in the veranda an hour, sipping English ale, and talking
+ about the king, and the sacred white elephant, the Sleeping Idol, and all
+ manner of things; and I noticed that my comrade never led the conversation
+ himself or shaped it, but simply followed Eckert's lead, and betrayed no
+ solicitude and no anxiety about anything. The effect was shortly
+ perceptible. Eckert began to grow communicative; he grew more and more at
+ his ease, and more and more talkative and sociable. Another hour passed in
+ the same way, and then all of a sudden Eckert said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh, by the way! I came near forgetting. I have got a thing here to
+ astonish you. Such a thing as neither you nor any other man ever heard of&mdash;I've
+ got a cat that will eat cocoanut! Common green cocoanut&mdash;and not only
+ eat the meat, but drink the milk. It is so&mdash;I'll swear to it."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A quick glance from Bascom&mdash;a glance that I understood&mdash;then:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why, bless my soul, I never heard of such a thing. Man, it is
+ impossible."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I knew you would say it. I'll fetch the cat."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He went in the house. Bascom said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "There&mdash;what did I tell you? Now, that is the way to handle Eckert.
+ You see, I have petted him along patiently, and put his suspicions to
+ sleep. I am glad we came. You tell the boys about it when you go back. Cat
+ eat a cocoanut&mdash;oh, my! Now, that is just his way, exactly&mdash;he
+ will tell the absurdest lie, and trust to luck to get out of it again.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Cat eat a cocoanut&mdash;the innocent fool!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link068" id="link068"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="068.jpg (84K)" src="images/068.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Eckert approached with his cat, sure enough.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Bascom smiled. Said he:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I'll hold the cat&mdash;you bring a cocoanut."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Eckert split one open, and chopped up some pieces. Bascom smuggled a wink
+ to me, and proffered a slice of the fruit to puss. She snatched it,
+ swallowed it ravenously, and asked for more!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We rode our two miles in silence, and wide apart. At least I was silent,
+ though Bascom cuffed his horse and cursed him a good deal, notwithstanding
+ the horse was behaving well enough. When I branched off homeward, Bascom
+ said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Keep the horse till morning. And&mdash;you need not speak of this&mdash;foolishness
+ to the boys."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link069" id="link069"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="069.jpg (50K)" src="images/069.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch08" id="linkch08"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER VIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In a little while all interest was taken up in stretching our necks and
+ watching for the "pony-rider"&mdash;the fleet messenger who sped across
+ the continent from St. Joe to Sacramento, carrying letters nineteen
+ hundred miles in eight days! Think of that for perishable horse and human
+ flesh and blood to do! The pony-rider was usually a little bit of a man,
+ brimful of spirit and endurance. No matter what time of the day or night
+ his watch came on, and no matter whether it was winter or summer, raining,
+ snowing, hailing, or sleeting, or whether his "beat" was a level straight
+ road or a crazy trail over mountain crags and precipices, or whether it
+ led through peaceful regions or regions that swarmed with hostile Indians,
+ he must be always ready to leap into the saddle and be off like the wind!
+ There was no idling-time for a pony-rider on duty. He rode fifty miles
+ without stopping, by daylight, moonlight, starlight, or through the
+ blackness of darkness&mdash;just as it happened. He rode a splendid horse
+ that was born for a racer and fed and lodged like a gentleman; kept him at
+ his utmost speed for ten miles, and then, as he came crashing up to the
+ station where stood two men holding fast a fresh, impatient steed, the
+ transfer of rider and mail-bag was made in the twinkling of an eye, and
+ away flew the eager pair and were out of sight before the spectator could
+ get hardly the ghost of a look. Both rider and horse went "flying light."
+ The rider's dress was thin, and fitted close; he wore a "round-about," and
+ a skull-cap, and tucked his pantaloons into his boot-tops like a
+ race-rider. He carried no arms&mdash;he carried nothing that was not
+ absolutely necessary, for even the postage on his literary freight was
+ worth five dollars a letter.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link071" id="link071"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="071.jpg (120K)" src="images/071.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He got but little frivolous correspondence to carry&mdash;his bag had
+ business letters in it, mostly. His horse was stripped of all unnecessary
+ weight, too. He wore a little wafer of a racing-saddle, and no visible
+ blanket. He wore light shoes, or none at all. The little flat mail-pockets
+ strapped under the rider's thighs would each hold about the bulk of a
+ child's primer. They held many and many an important business chapter and
+ newspaper letter, but these were written on paper as airy and thin as
+ gold-leaf, nearly, and thus bulk and weight were economized. The stage-
+ coach traveled about a hundred to a hundred and twenty-five miles a day
+ (twenty-four hours), the pony-rider about two hundred and fifty. There
+ were about eighty pony-riders in the saddle all the time, night and day,
+ stretching in a long, scattering procession from Missouri to California,
+ forty flying eastward, and forty toward the west, and among them making
+ four hundred gallant horses earn a stirring livelihood and see a deal of
+ scenery every single day in the year.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We had had a consuming desire, from the beginning, to see a pony-rider,
+ but somehow or other all that passed us and all that met us managed to
+ streak by in the night, and so we heard only a whiz and a hail, and the
+ swift phantom of the desert was gone before we could get our heads out of
+ the windows. But now we were expecting one along every moment, and would
+ see him in broad daylight. Presently the driver exclaims:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "HERE HE COMES!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Every neck is stretched further, and every eye strained wider. Away across
+ the endless dead level of the prairie a black speck appears against the
+ sky, and it is plain that it moves. Well, I should think so!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In a second or two it becomes a horse and rider, rising and falling,
+ rising and falling&mdash;sweeping toward us nearer and nearer&mdash;growing
+ more and more distinct, more and more sharply defined&mdash;nearer and
+ still nearer, and the flutter of the hoofs comes faintly to the ear&mdash;another
+ instant a whoop and a hurrah from our upper deck, a wave of the rider's
+ hand, but no reply, and man and horse burst past our excited faces, and go
+ winging away like a belated fragment of a storm!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link072" id="link072"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="072.jpg (33K)" src="images/072.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So sudden is it all, and so like a flash of unreal fancy, that but for the
+ flake of white foam left quivering and perishing on a mail-sack after the
+ vision had flashed by and disappeared, we might have doubted whether we
+ had seen any actual horse and man at all, maybe.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We rattled through Scott's Bluffs Pass, by and by. It was along here
+ somewhere that we first came across genuine and unmistakable alkali water
+ in the road, and we cordially hailed it as a first-class curiosity, and a
+ thing to be mentioned with eclat in letters to the ignorant at home. This
+ water gave the road a soapy appearance, and in many places the ground
+ looked as if it had been whitewashed. I think the strange alkali water
+ excited us as much as any wonder we had come upon yet, and I know we felt
+ very complacent and conceited, and better satisfied with life after we had
+ added it to our list of things which we had seen and some other people had
+ not. In a small way we were the same sort of simpletons as those who climb
+ unnecessarily the perilous peaks of Mont Blanc and the Matterhorn, and
+ derive no pleasure from it except the reflection that it isn't a common
+ experience. But once in a while one of those parties trips and comes
+ darting down the long mountain-crags in a sitting posture, making the
+ crusted snow smoke behind him, flitting from bench to bench, and from
+ terrace to terrace, jarring the earth where he strikes, and still glancing
+ and flitting on again, sticking an iceberg into himself every now and
+ then, and tearing his clothes, snatching at things to save himself, taking
+ hold of trees and fetching them along with him, roots and all, starting
+ little rocks now and then, then big boulders, then acres of ice and snow
+ and patches of forest, gathering and still gathering as he goes, adding
+ and still adding to his massed and sweeping grandeur as he nears a three
+ thousand-foot precipice, till at last he waves his hat magnificently and
+ rides into eternity on the back of a raging and tossing avalanche!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link073" id="link073"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="073.jpg (48K)" src="images/073.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This is all very fine, but let us not be carried away by excitement, but
+ ask calmly, how does this person feel about it in his cooler moments next
+ day, with six or seven thousand feet of snow and stuff on top of him?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We crossed the sand hills near the scene of the Indian mail robbery and
+ massacre of 1856, wherein the driver and conductor perished, and also all
+ the passengers but one, it was supposed; but this must have been a
+ mistake, for at different times afterward on the Pacific coast I was
+ personally acquainted with a hundred and thirty-three or four people who
+ were wounded during that massacre, and barely escaped with their lives.
+ There was no doubt of the truth of it&mdash;I had it from their own lips.
+ One of these parties told me that he kept coming across arrow-heads in his
+ system for nearly seven years after the massacre; and another of them told
+ me that he was struck so literally full of arrows that after the Indians
+ were gone and he could raise up and examine himself, he could not restrain
+ his tears, for his clothes were completely ruined.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The most trustworthy tradition avers, however, that only one man, a person
+ named Babbitt, survived the massacre, and he was desperately wounded. He
+ dragged himself on his hands and knee (for one leg was broken) to a
+ station several miles away. He did it during portions of two nights, lying
+ concealed one day and part of another, and for more than forty hours
+ suffering unimaginable anguish from hunger, thirst and bodily pain. The
+ Indians robbed the coach of everything it contained, including quite an
+ amount of treasure.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch09" id="linkch09"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER IX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We passed Fort Laramie in the night, and on the seventh morning out we
+ found ourselves in the Black Hills, with Laramie Peak at our elbow
+ (apparently) looming vast and solitary&mdash;a deep, dark, rich indigo
+ blue in hue, so portentously did the old colossus frown under his beetling
+ brows of storm-cloud. He was thirty or forty miles away, in reality, but
+ he only seemed removed a little beyond the low ridge at our right. We
+ breakfasted at Horse-Shoe Station, six hundred and seventy-six miles out
+ from St. Joseph. We had now reached a hostile Indian country, and during
+ the afternoon we passed Laparelle Station, and enjoyed great discomfort
+ all the time we were in the neighborhood, being aware that many of the
+ trees we dashed by at arm's length concealed a lurking Indian or two.
+ During the preceding night an ambushed savage had sent a bullet through
+ the pony-rider's jacket, but he had ridden on, just the same, because
+ pony-riders were not allowed to stop and inquire into such things except
+ when killed. As long as they had life enough left in them they had to
+ stick to the horse and ride, even if the Indians had been waiting for them
+ a week, and were entirely out of patience. About two hours and a half
+ before we arrived at Laparelle Station, the keeper in charge of it had
+ fired four times at an Indian, but he said with an injured air that the
+ Indian had "skipped around so's to spile everything&mdash;and ammunition's
+ blamed skurse, too." The most natural inference conveyed by his manner of
+ speaking was, that in "skipping around," the Indian had taken an unfair
+ advantage.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The coach we were in had a neat hole through its front&mdash;a
+ reminiscence of its last trip through this region. The bullet that made it
+ wounded the driver slightly, but he did not mind it much. He said the
+ place to keep a man "huffy" was down on the Southern Overland, among the
+ Apaches, before the company moved the stage line up on the northern route.
+ He said the Apaches used to annoy him all the time down there, and that he
+ came as near as anything to starving to death in the midst of abundance,
+ because they kept him so leaky with bullet holes that he "couldn't hold
+ his vittles." This person's statement were not generally believed.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link076" id="link076"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="076.jpg (53K)" src="images/076.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We shut the blinds down very tightly that first night in the hostile
+ Indian country, and lay on our arms. We slept on them some, but most of
+ the time we only lay on them. We did not talk much, but kept quiet and
+ listened. It was an inky-black night, and occasionally rainy. We were
+ among woods and rocks, hills and gorges&mdash;so shut in, in fact, that
+ when we peeped through a chink in a curtain, we could discern nothing. The
+ driver and conductor on top were still, too, or only spoke at long
+ intervals, in low tones, as is the way of men in the midst of invisible
+ dangers. We listened to rain-drops pattering on the roof; and the grinding
+ of the wheels through the muddy gravel; and the low wailing of the wind;
+ and all the time we had that absurd sense upon us, inseparable from travel
+ at night in a close-curtained vehicle, the sense of remaining perfectly
+ still in one place, notwithstanding the jolting and swaying of the
+ vehicle, the trampling of the horses, and the grinding of the wheels. We
+ listened a long time, with intent faculties and bated breath; every time
+ one of us would relax, and draw a long sigh of relief and start to say
+ something, a comrade would be sure to utter a sudden "Hark!" and instantly
+ the experimenter was rigid and listening again. So the tiresome minutes
+ and decades of minutes dragged away, until at last our tense forms filmed
+ over with a dulled consciousness, and we slept, if one might call such a
+ condition by so strong a name&mdash;for it was a sleep set with a
+ hair-trigger. It was a sleep seething and teeming with a weird and
+ distressful confusion of shreds and fag-ends of dreams&mdash;a sleep that
+ was a chaos. Presently, dreams and sleep and the sullen hush of the night
+ were startled by a ringing report, and cloven by such a long, wild,
+ agonizing shriek! Then we heard&mdash;ten steps from the stage&mdash;
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Help! help! help!" [It was our driver's voice.]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Kill him! Kill him like a dog!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I'm being murdered! Will no man lend me a pistol?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Look out! head him off! head him off!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ [Two pistol shots; a confusion of voices and the trampling of many feet,
+ as if a crowd were closing and surging together around some object;
+ several heavy, dull blows, as with a club; a voice that said appealingly,
+ "Don't, gentlemen, please don't&mdash;I'm a dead man!" Then a fainter
+ groan, and another blow, and away sped the stage into the darkness, and
+ left the grisly mystery behind us.]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ What a startle it was! Eight seconds would amply cover the time it
+ occupied&mdash;maybe even five would do it. We only had time to plunge at
+ a curtain and unbuckle and unbutton part of it in an awkward and hindering
+ flurry, when our whip cracked sharply overhead, and we went rumbling and
+ thundering away, down a mountain "grade."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We fed on that mystery the rest of the night&mdash;what was left of it,
+ for it was waning fast. It had to remain a present mystery, for all we
+ could get from the conductor in answer to our hails was something that
+ sounded, through the clatter of the wheels, like "Tell you in the
+ morning!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So we lit our pipes and opened the corner of a curtain for a chimney, and
+ lay there in the dark, listening to each other's story of how he first
+ felt and how many thousand Indians he first thought had hurled themselves
+ upon us, and what his remembrance of the subsequent sounds was, and the
+ order of their occurrence. And we theorized, too, but there was never a
+ theory that would account for our driver's voice being out there, nor yet
+ account for his Indian murderers talking such good English, if they were
+ Indians.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So we chatted and smoked the rest of the night comfortably away, our
+ boding anxiety being somehow marvelously dissipated by the real presence
+ of something to be anxious about.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We never did get much satisfaction about that dark occurrence. All that we
+ could make out of the odds and ends of the information we gathered in the
+ morning, was that the disturbance occurred at a station; that we changed
+ drivers there, and that the driver that got off there had been talking
+ roughly about some of the outlaws that infested the region ("for there
+ wasn't a man around there but had a price on his head and didn't dare show
+ himself in the settlements," the conductor said); he had talked roughly
+ about these characters, and ought to have "drove up there with his pistol
+ cocked and ready on the seat alongside of him, and begun business himself,
+ because any softy would know they would be laying for him."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ That was all we could gather, and we could see that neither the conductor
+ nor the new driver were much concerned about the matter. They plainly had
+ little respect for a man who would deliver offensive opinions of people
+ and then be so simple as to come into their presence unprepared to "back
+ his judgment," as they pleasantly phrased the killing of any fellow-being
+ who did not like said opinions. And likewise they plainly had a contempt
+ for the man's poor discretion in venturing to rouse the wrath of such
+ utterly reckless wild beasts as those outlaws&mdash;and the conductor
+ added:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I tell you it's as much as Slade himself want to do!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This remark created an entire revolution in my curiosity. I cared nothing
+ now about the Indians, and even lost interest in the murdered driver.
+ There was such magic in that name, SLADE! Day or night, now, I stood
+ always ready to drop any subject in hand, to listen to something new about
+ Slade and his ghastly exploits. Even before we got to Overland City, we
+ had begun to hear about Slade and his "division" (for he was a
+ "division-agent") on the Overland; and from the hour we had left Overland
+ City we had heard drivers and conductors talk about only three things&mdash;"Californy,"
+ the Nevada silver mines, and this desperado Slade. And a deal the most of
+ the talk was about Slade. We had gradually come to have a realizing sense
+ of the fact that Slade was a man whose heart and hands and soul were
+ steeped in the blood of offenders against his dignity; a man who awfully
+ avenged all injuries, affront, insults or slights, of whatever kind&mdash;on
+ the spot if he could, years afterward if lack of earlier opportunity
+ compelled it; a man whose hate tortured him day and night till vengeance
+ appeased it&mdash;and not an ordinary vengeance either, but his enemy's
+ absolute death&mdash;nothing less; a man whose face would light up with a
+ terrible joy when he surprised a foe and had him at a disadvantage. A high
+ and efficient servant of the Overland, an outlaw among outlaws and yet
+ their relentless scourge, Slade was at once the most bloody, the most
+ dangerous and the most valuable citizen that inhabited the savage
+ fastnesses of the mountains.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch10" id="linkch10"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER X.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Really and truly, two thirds of the talk of drivers and conductors had
+ been about this man Slade, ever since the day before we reached Julesburg.
+ In order that the eastern reader may have a clear conception of what a
+ Rocky Mountain desperado is, in his highest state of development, I will
+ reduce all this mass of overland gossip to one straightforward narrative,
+ and present it in the following shape:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Slade was born in Illinois, of good parentage. At about twenty-six years
+ of age he killed a man in a quarrel and fled the country. At St. Joseph,
+ Missouri, he joined one of the early California-bound emigrant trains, and
+ was given the post of train-master. One day on the plains he had an angry
+ dispute with one of his wagon-drivers, and both drew their revolvers. But
+ the driver was the quicker artist, and had his weapon cocked first. So
+ Slade said it was a pity to waste life on so small a matter, and proposed
+ that the pistols be thrown on the ground and the quarrel settled by a
+ fist-fight. The unsuspecting driver agreed, and threw down his pistol&mdash;whereupon
+ Slade laughed at his simplicity, and shot him dead!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He made his escape, and lived a wild life for awhile, dividing his time
+ between fighting Indians and avoiding an Illinois sheriff, who had been
+ sent to arrest him for his first murder. It is said that in one Indian
+ battle he killed three savages with his own hand, and afterward cut their
+ ears off and sent them, with his compliments, to the chief of the tribe.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link081" id="link081"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="081.jpg (55K)" src="images/081.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Slade soon gained a name for fearless resolution, and this was sufficient
+ merit to procure for him the important post of overland division-agent at
+ Julesburg, in place of Mr. Jules, removed. For some time previously, the
+ company's horses had been frequently stolen, and the coaches delayed, by
+ gangs of outlaws, who were wont to laugh at the idea of any man's having
+ the temerity to resent such outrages. Slade resented them promptly.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The outlaws soon found that the new agent was a man who did not fear
+ anything that breathed the breath of life. He made short work of all
+ offenders. The result was that delays ceased, the company's property was
+ let alone, and no matter what happened or who suffered, Slade's coaches
+ went through, every time! True, in order to bring about this wholesome
+ change, Slade had to kill several men&mdash;some say three, others say
+ four, and others six&mdash;but the world was the richer for their loss.
+ The first prominent difficulty he had was with the ex-agent Jules, who
+ bore the reputation of being a reckless and desperate man himself. Jules
+ hated Slade for supplanting him, and a good fair occasion for a fight was
+ all he was waiting for. By and by Slade dared to employ a man whom Jules
+ had once discharged. Next, Slade seized a team of stage-horses which he
+ accused Jules of having driven off and hidden somewhere for his own use.
+ War was declared, and for a day or two the two men walked warily about the
+ streets, seeking each other, Jules armed with a double-barreled shot gun,
+ and Slade with his history-creating revolver. Finally, as Slade stepped
+ into a store Jules poured the contents of his gun into him from behind the
+ door. Slade was plucky, and Jules got several bad pistol wounds in return.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link082" id="link082"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="082.jpg (157K)" src="images/082.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then both men fell, and were carried to their respective lodgings, both
+ swearing that better aim should do deadlier work next time. Both were
+ bedridden a long time, but Jules got to his feet first, and gathering his
+ possessions together, packed them on a couple of mules, and fled to the
+ Rocky Mountains to gather strength in safety against the day of reckoning.
+ For many months he was not seen or heard of, and was gradually dropped out
+ of the remembrance of all save Slade himself. But Slade was not the man to
+ forget him. On the contrary, common report said that Slade kept a reward
+ standing for his capture, dead or alive!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After awhile, seeing that Slade's energetic administration had restored
+ peace and order to one of the worst divisions of the road, the overland
+ stage company transferred him to the Rocky Ridge division in the Rocky
+ Mountains, to see if he could perform a like miracle there. It was the
+ very paradise of outlaws and desperadoes. There was absolutely no
+ semblance of law there. Violence was the rule. Force was the only
+ recognized authority. The commonest misunderstandings were settled on the
+ spot with the revolver or the knife. Murders were done in open day, and
+ with sparkling frequency, and nobody thought of inquiring into them. It
+ was considered that the parties who did the killing had their private
+ reasons for it; for other people to meddle would have been looked upon as
+ indelicate. After a murder, all that Rocky Mountain etiquette required of
+ a spectator was, that he should help the gentleman bury his game&mdash;otherwise
+ his churlishness would surely be remembered against him the first time he
+ killed a man himself and needed a neighborly turn in interring him.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Slade took up his residence sweetly and peacefully in the midst of this
+ hive of horse-thieves and assassins, and the very first time one of them
+ aired his insolent swaggerings in his presence he shot him dead! He began
+ a raid on the outlaws, and in a singularly short space of time he had
+ completely stopped their depredations on the stage stock, recovered a
+ large number of stolen horses, killed several of the worst desperadoes of
+ the district, and gained such a dread ascendancy over the rest that they
+ respected him, admired him, feared him, obeyed him! He wrought the same
+ marvelous change in the ways of the community that had marked his
+ administration at Overland City. He captured two men who had stolen
+ overland stock, and with his own hands he hanged them. He was supreme
+ judge in his district, and he was jury and executioner likewise&mdash;and
+ not only in the case of offences against his employers, but against
+ passing emigrants as well. On one occasion some emigrants had their stock
+ lost or stolen, and told Slade, who chanced to visit their camp. With a
+ single companion he rode to a ranch, the owners of which he suspected, and
+ opening the door, commenced firing, killing three, and wounding the
+ fourth.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ From a bloodthirstily interesting little Montana book.&mdash;["The
+ Vigilantes of Montana," by Prof. Thos. J. Dimsdale.]&mdash;I take this
+ paragraph:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "While on the road, Slade held absolute sway. He would ride down to a
+ station, get into a quarrel, turn the house out of windows, and maltreat
+ the occupants most cruelly. The unfortunates had no means of redress,
+ and were compelled to recuperate as best they could."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link084" id="link084"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="084.jpg (67K)" src="images/084.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On one of these occasions, it is said he killed the father of the fine
+ little half-breed boy Jemmy, whom he adopted, and who lived with his
+ widow after his execution. Stories of Slade's hanging men, and of
+ innumerable assaults, shootings, stabbings and beatings, in which he was
+ a principal actor, form part of the legends of the stage line. As for
+ minor quarrels and shootings, it is absolutely certain that a minute
+ history of Slade's life would be one long record of such practices.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "The Vigilantes of Montana" by Prof. Thomas J. Dimsdale
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ Slade was a matchless marksman with a navy revolver. The legends say that
+ one morning at Rocky Ridge, when he was feeling comfortable, he saw a man
+ approaching who had offended him some days before&mdash;observe the fine
+ memory he had for matters like that&mdash;and, "Gentlemen," said Slade,
+ drawing, "it is a good twenty-yard shot&mdash;I'll clip the third button
+ on his coat!" Which he did. The bystanders all admired it. And they all
+ attended the funeral, too.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On one occasion a man who kept a little whisky-shelf at the station did
+ something which angered Slade&mdash;and went and made his will. A day or
+ two afterward Slade came in and called for some brandy. The man reached
+ under the counter (ostensibly to get a bottle&mdash;possibly to get
+ something else), but Slade smiled upon him that peculiarly bland and
+ satisfied smile of his which the neighbors had long ago learned to
+ recognize as a death-warrant in disguise, and told him to "none of that!&mdash;pass
+ out the high-priced article." So the poor bar-keeper had to turn his back
+ and get the high-priced brandy from the shelf; and when he faced around
+ again he was looking into the muzzle of Slade's pistol. "And the next
+ instant," added my informant, impressively, "he was one of the deadest men
+ that ever lived."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link085" id="link085"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="085.jpg (94K)" src="images/085.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The stage-drivers and conductors told us that sometimes Slade would leave
+ a hated enemy wholly unmolested, unnoticed and unmentioned, for weeks
+ together&mdash;had done it once or twice at any rate. And some said they
+ believed he did it in order to lull the victims into unwatchfulness, so
+ that he could get the advantage of them, and others said they believed he
+ saved up an enemy that way, just as a schoolboy saves up a cake, and made
+ the pleasure go as far as it would by gloating over the anticipation. One
+ of these cases was that of a Frenchman who had offended Slade. To the
+ surprise of everybody Slade did not kill him on the spot, but let him
+ alone for a considerable time. Finally, however, he went to the
+ Frenchman's house very late one night, knocked, and when his enemy opened
+ the door, shot him dead&mdash;pushed the corpse inside the door with his
+ foot, set the house on fire and burned up the dead man, his widow and
+ three children! I heard this story from several different people, and they
+ evidently believed what they were saying. It may be true, and it may not.
+ "Give a dog a bad name," etc.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Slade was captured, once, by a party of men who intended to lynch him.
+ They disarmed him, and shut him up in a strong log-house, and placed a
+ guard over him. He prevailed on his captors to send for his wife, so that
+ he might have a last interview with her. She was a brave, loving, spirited
+ woman. She jumped on a horse and rode for life and death. When she arrived
+ they let her in without searching her, and before the door could be closed
+ she whipped out a couple of revolvers, and she and her lord marched forth
+ defying the party. And then, under a brisk fire, they mounted double and
+ galloped away unharmed!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In the fulness of time Slade's myrmidons captured his ancient enemy Jules,
+ whom they found in a well-chosen hiding-place in the remote fastnesses of
+ the mountains, gaining a precarious livelihood with his rifle. They
+ brought him to Rocky Ridge, bound hand and foot, and deposited him in the
+ middle of the cattle-yard with his back against a post. It is said that
+ the pleasure that lit Slade's face when he heard of it was something
+ fearful to contemplate. He examined his enemy to see that he was securely
+ tied, and then went to bed, content to wait till morning before enjoying
+ the luxury of killing him. Jules spent the night in the cattle-yard, and
+ it is a region where warm nights are never known. In the morning Slade
+ practised on him with his revolver, nipping the flesh here and there, and
+ occasionally clipping off a finger, while Jules begged him to kill him
+ outright and put him out of his misery. Finally Slade reloaded, and
+ walking up close to his victim, made some characteristic remarks and then
+ dispatched him. The body lay there half a day, nobody venturing to touch
+ it without orders, and then Slade detailed a party and assisted at the
+ burial himself. But he first cut off the dead man's ears and put them in
+ his vest pocket, where he carried them for some time with great
+ satisfaction. That is the story as I have frequently heard it told and
+ seen it in print in California newspapers. It is doubtless correct in all
+ essential particulars.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In due time we rattled up to a stage-station, and sat down to breakfast
+ with a half-savage, half-civilized company of armed and bearded
+ mountaineers, ranchmen and station employees. The most gentlemanly-
+ appearing, quiet and affable officer we had yet found along the road in
+ the Overland Company's service was the person who sat at the head of the
+ table, at my elbow. Never youth stared and shivered as I did when I heard
+ them call him SLADE!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Here was romance, and I sitting face to face with it!&mdash;looking upon
+ it&mdash;touching it&mdash;hobnobbing with it, as it were! Here, right by
+ my side, was the actual ogre who, in fights and brawls and various ways,
+ had taken the lives of twenty-six human beings, or all men lied about him!
+ I suppose I was the proudest stripling that ever traveled to see strange
+ lands and wonderful people.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He was so friendly and so gentle-spoken that I warmed to him in spite of
+ his awful history. It was hardly possible to realize that this pleasant
+ person was the pitiless scourge of the outlaws, the raw-head-and-bloody-
+ bones the nursing mothers of the mountains terrified their children with.
+ And to this day I can remember nothing remarkable about Slade except that
+ his face was rather broad across the cheek bones, and that the cheek bones
+ were low and the lips peculiarly thin and straight. But that was enough to
+ leave something of an effect upon me, for since then I seldom see a face
+ possessing those characteristics without fancying that the owner of it is
+ a dangerous man.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link088" id="link088"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="088.jpg (57K)" src="images/088.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The coffee ran out. At least it was reduced to one tin-cupful, and Slade
+ was about to take it when he saw that my cup was empty.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He politely offered to fill it, but although I wanted it, I politely
+ declined. I was afraid he had not killed anybody that morning, and might
+ be needing diversion. But still with firm politeness he insisted on
+ filling my cup, and said I had traveled all night and better deserved it
+ than he&mdash;and while he talked he placidly poured the fluid, to the
+ last drop. I thanked him and drank it, but it gave me no comfort, for I
+ could not feel sure that he would not be sorry, presently, that he had
+ given it away, and proceed to kill me to distract his thoughts from the
+ loss. But nothing of the kind occurred. We left him with only twenty-six
+ dead people to account for, and I felt a tranquil satisfaction in the
+ thought that in so judiciously taking care of No. 1 at that
+ breakfast-table I had pleasantly escaped being No. 27. Slade came out to
+ the coach and saw us off, first ordering certain rearrangements of the
+ mail-bags for our comfort, and then we took leave of him, satisfied that
+ we should hear of him again, some day, and wondering in what connection.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link089" id="link089"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="089.jpg (31K)" src="images/089.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch11" id="linkch11"></a>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And sure enough, two or three years afterward, we did hear him again. News
+ came to the Pacific coast that the Vigilance Committee in Montana (whither
+ Slade had removed from Rocky Ridge) had hanged him. I find an account of
+ the affair in the thrilling little book I quoted a paragraph from in the
+ last chapter&mdash;"The Vigilantes of Montana; being a Reliable Account of
+ the Capture, Trial and Execution of Henry Plummer's Notorious Road Agent
+ Band: By Prof. Thos. J. Dimsdale, Virginia City, M.T." Mr. Dimsdale's
+ chapter is well worth reading, as a specimen of how the people of the
+ frontier deal with criminals when the courts of law prove inefficient. Mr.
+ Dimsdale makes two remarks about Slade, both of which are accurately
+ descriptive, and one of which is exceedingly picturesque: "Those who saw
+ him in his natural state only, would pronounce him to be a kind husband, a
+ most hospitable host and a courteous gentleman; on the contrary, those who
+ met him when maddened with liquor and surrounded by a gang of armed
+ roughs, would pronounce him a fiend incarnate." And this: "From Fort
+ Kearney, west, he was feared a great deal more than the almighty." For
+ compactness, simplicity and vigor of expression, I will "back" that
+ sentence against anything in literature. Mr. Dimsdale's narrative is as
+ follows. In all places where italics occur, they are mine:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ After the execution of the five men on the 14th of January, the
+ Vigilantes considered that their work was nearly ended. They had freed
+ the country of highwaymen and murderers to a great extent, and they
+ determined that in the absence of the regular civil authority they would
+ establish a People's Court where all offenders should be tried by judge
+ and jury. This was the nearest approach to social order that the
+ circumstances permitted, and, though strict legal authority was wanting,
+ yet the people were firmly determined to maintain its efficiency, and to
+ enforce its decrees. It may here be mentioned that the overt act which
+ was the last round on the fatal ladder leading to the scaffold on which
+ Slade perished, was the tearing in pieces and stamping upon a writ of
+ this court, followed by his arrest of the Judge Alex. Davis, by
+ authority of a presented Derringer, and with his own hands.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ J. A. Slade was himself, we have been informed, a Vigilante; he openly
+ boasted of it, and said he knew all that they knew. He was never
+ accused, or even suspected, of either murder or robbery, committed in
+ this Territory (the latter crime was never laid to his charge, in any
+ place); but that he had killed several men in other localities was
+ notorious, and his bad reputation in this respect was a most powerful
+ argument in determining his fate, when he was finally arrested for the
+ offence above mentioned. On returning from Milk River he became more and
+ more addicted to drinking, until at last it was a common feat for him
+ and his friends to "take the town." He and a couple of his dependents
+ might often be seen on one horse, galloping through the streets,
+ shouting and yelling, firing revolvers, etc. On many occasions he would
+ ride his horse into stores, break up bars, toss the scales out of doors
+ and use most insulting language to parties present. Just previous to the
+ day of his arrest, he had given a fearful beating to one of his
+ followers; but such was his influence over them that the man wept
+ bitterly at the gallows, and begged for his life with all his power. It
+ had become quite common, when Slade was on a spree, for the shop-keepers
+ and citizens to close the stores and put out all the lights; being
+ fearful of some outrage at his hands. For his wanton destruction of
+ goods and furniture, he was always ready to pay, when sober, if he had
+ money; but there were not a few who regarded payment as small
+ satisfaction for the outrage, and these men were his personal enemies.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ From time to time Slade received warnings from men that he well knew
+ would not deceive him, of the certain end of his conduct. There was not
+ a moment, for weeks previous to his arrest, in which the public did not
+ expect to hear of some bloody outrage. The dread of his very name, and
+ the presence of the armed band of hangers-on who followed him alone
+ prevented a resistance which must certainly have ended in the instant
+ murder or mutilation of the opposing party.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Slade was frequently arrested by order of the court whose organization
+ we have described, and had treated it with respect by paying one or two
+ fines and promising to pay the rest when he had money; but in the
+ transaction that occurred at this crisis, he forgot even this caution,
+ and goaded by passion and the hatred of restraint, he sprang into the
+ embrace of death.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Slade had been drunk and "cutting up" all night. He and his companions
+ had made the town a perfect hell. In the morning, J. M. Fox, the
+ sheriff, met him, arrested him, took him into court and commenced
+ reading a warrant that he had for his arrest, by way of arraignment. He
+ became uncontrollably furious, and seizing the writ, he tore it up,
+ threw it on the ground and stamped upon it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link092" id="link092"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="092.jpg (121K)" src="images/092.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The clicking of the locks of his companions' revolvers was instantly
+ heard, and a crisis was expected. The sheriff did not attempt his
+ retention; but being at least as prudent as he was valiant, he
+ succumbed, leaving Slade the master of the situation and the conqueror
+ and ruler of the courts, law and law-makers. This was a declaration of
+ war, and was so accepted. The Vigilance Committee now felt that the
+ question of social order and the preponderance of the law-abiding
+ citizens had then and there to be decided. They knew the character of
+ Slade, and they were well aware that they must submit to his rule
+ without murmur, or else that he must be dealt with in such fashion as
+ would prevent his being able to wreak his vengeance on the committee,
+ who could never have hoped to live in the Territory secure from outrage
+ or death, and who could never leave it without encountering his friend,
+ whom his victory would have emboldened and stimulated to a pitch that
+ would have rendered them reckless of consequences. The day previous he
+ had ridden into Dorris's store, and on being requested to leave, he drew
+ his revolver and threatened to kill the gentleman who spoke to him.
+ Another saloon he had led his horse into, and buying a bottle of wine,
+ he tried to make the animal drink it. This was not considered an
+ uncommon performance, as he had often entered saloons and commenced
+ firing at the lamps, causing a wild stampede.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A leading member of the committee met Slade, and informed him in the
+ quiet, earnest manner of one who feels the importance of what he is
+ saying: "Slade, get your horse at once, and go home, or there will be&mdash;&mdash;to
+ pay." Slade started and took a long look, with his dark and piercing
+ eyes, at the gentleman. "What do you mean?" said he. "You have no right
+ to ask me what I mean," was the quiet reply, "get your horse at once,
+ and remember what I tell you." After a short pause he promised to do so,
+ and actually got into the saddle; but, being still intoxicated, he began
+ calling aloud to one after another of his friends, and at last seemed to
+ have forgotten the warning he had received and became again uproarious,
+ shouting the name of a well-known courtezan in company with those of two
+ men whom he considered heads of the committee, as a sort of challenge;
+ perhaps, however, as a simple act of bravado. It seems probable that the
+ intimation of personal danger he had received had not been forgotten
+ entirely; though fatally for him, he took a foolish way of showing his
+ remembrance of it. He sought out Alexander Davis, the Judge of the
+ Court, and drawing a cocked Derringer, he presented it at his head, and
+ told him that he should hold him as a hostage for his own safety. As the
+ judge stood perfectly quiet, and offered no resistance to his captor, no
+ further outrage followed on this score. Previous to this, on account of
+ the critical state of affairs, the committee had met, and at last
+ resolved to arrest him. His execution had not been agreed upon, and, at
+ that time, would have been negatived, most assuredly. A messenger rode
+ down to Nevada to inform the leading men of what was on hand, as it was
+ desirable to show that there was a feeling of unanimity on the subject,
+ all along the gulch.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The miners turned out almost en masse, leaving their work and forming in
+ solid column about six hundred strong, armed to the teeth, they marched
+ up to Virginia. The leader of the body well knew the temper of his men
+ on the subject. He spurred on ahead of them, and hastily calling a
+ meeting of the executive, he told them plainly that the miners meant
+ "business," and that, if they came up, they would not stand in the
+ street to be shot down by Slade's friends; but that they would take him
+ and hang him. The meeting was small, as the Virginia men were loath to
+ act at all. This momentous announcement of the feeling of the Lower Town
+ was made to a cluster of men, who were deliberation behind a wagon, at
+ the rear of a store on Main street.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The committee were most unwilling to proceed to extremities. All the
+ duty they had ever performed seemed as nothing to the task before them;
+ but they had to decide, and that quickly. It was finally agreed that if
+ the whole body of the miners were of the opinion that he should be
+ hanged, that the committee left it in their hands to deal with him. Off,
+ at hot speed, rode the leader of the Nevada men to join his command.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Slade had found out what was intended, and the news sobered him
+ instantly. He went into P. S. Pfouts' store, where Davis was, and
+ apologized for his conduct, saying that he would take it all back.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The head of the column now wheeled into Wallace street and marched up at
+ quick time. Halting in front of the store, the executive officer of the
+ committee stepped forward and arrested Slade, who was at once informed
+ of his doom, and inquiry was made as to whether he had any business to
+ settle. Several parties spoke to him on the subject; but to all such
+ inquiries he turned a deaf ear, being entirely absorbed in the
+ terrifying reflections on his own awful position. He never ceased his
+ entreaties for life, and to see his dear wife. The unfortunate lady
+ referred to, between whom and Slade there existed a warm affection, was
+ at this time living at their ranch on the Madison. She was possessed of
+ considerable personal attractions; tall, well-formed, of graceful
+ carriage, pleasing manners, and was, withal, an accomplished horsewoman.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A messenger from Slade rode at full speed to inform her of her husband's
+ arrest. In an instant she was in the saddle, and with all the energy
+ that love and despair could lend to an ardent temperament and a strong
+ physique, she urged her fleet charger over the twelve miles of rough and
+ rocky ground that intervened between her and the object of her
+ passionate devotion.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Meanwhile a party of volunteers had made the necessary preparations for
+ the execution, in the valley traversed by the branch. Beneath the site
+ of Pfouts and Russell's stone building there was a corral, the
+ gate-posts of which were strong and high. Across the top was laid a
+ beam, to which the rope was fastened, and a dry-goods box served for the
+ platform. To this place Slade was marched, surrounded by a guard,
+ composing the best armed and most numerous force that has ever appeared
+ in Montana Territory.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The doomed man had so exhausted himself by tears, prayers and
+ lamentations, that he had scarcely strength left to stand under the
+ fatal beam. He repeatedly exclaimed, "My God! my God! must I die? Oh, my
+ dear wife!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On the return of the fatigue party, they encountered some friends of
+ Slade, staunch and reliable citizens and members of the committee, but
+ who were personally attached to the condemned. On hearing of his
+ sentence, one of them, a stout-hearted man, pulled out his handkerchief
+ and walked away, weeping like a child. Slade still begged to see his
+ wife, most piteously, and it seemed hard to deny his request; but the
+ bloody consequences that were sure to follow the inevitable attempt at a
+ rescue, that her presence and entreaties would have certainly incited,
+ forbade the granting of his request. Several gentlemen were sent for to
+ see him, in his last moments, one of whom (Judge Davis) made a short
+ address to the people; but in such low tones as to be inaudible, save to
+ a few in his immediate vicinity. One of his friends, after exhausting
+ his powers of entreaty, threw off his coat and declared that the
+ prisoner could not be hanged until he himself was killed. A hundred guns
+ were instantly leveled at him; whereupon he turned and fled; but, being
+ brought back, he was compelled to resume his coat, and to give a promise
+ of future peaceable demeanor.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Scarcely a leading man in Virginia could be found, though numbers of the
+ citizens joined the ranks of the guard when the arrest was made. All
+ lamented the stern necessity which dictated the execution.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Everything being ready, the command was given, "Men, do your duty," and
+ the box being instantly slipped from beneath his feet, he died almost
+ instantaneously.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The body was cut down and carried to the Virginia Hotel, where, in a
+ darkened room, it was scarcely laid out, when the unfortunate and
+ bereaved companion of the deceased arrived, at headlong speed, to find
+ that all was over, and that she was a widow. Her grief and
+ heart-piercing cries were terrible evidences of the depth of her
+ attachment for her lost husband, and a considerable period elapsed
+ before she could regain the command of her excited feelings.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link095" id="link095"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="095.jpg (48K)" src="images/095.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There is something about the desperado-nature that is wholly unaccountable&mdash;at
+ least it looks unaccountable. It is this. The true desperado is gifted
+ with splendid courage, and yet he will take the most infamous advantage of
+ his enemy; armed and free, he will stand up before a host and fight until
+ he is shot all to pieces, and yet when he is under the gallows and
+ helpless he will cry and plead like a child. Words are cheap, and it is
+ easy to call Slade a coward (all executed men who do not "die game" are
+ promptly called cowards by unreflecting people), and when we read of Slade
+ that he "had so exhausted himself by tears, prayers and lamentations, that
+ he had scarcely strength left to stand under the fatal beam," the
+ disgraceful word suggests itself in a moment&mdash;yet in frequently
+ defying and inviting the vengeance of banded Rocky Mountain cut-throats by
+ shooting down their comrades and leaders, and never offering to hide or
+ fly, Slade showed that he was a man of peerless bravery. No coward would
+ dare that. Many a notorious coward, many a chicken-livered poltroon,
+ coarse, brutal, degraded, has made his dying speech without a quaver in
+ his voice and been swung into eternity with what looked liked the calmest
+ fortitude, and so we are justified in believing, from the low intellect of
+ such a creature, that it was not moral courage that enabled him to do it.
+ Then, if moral courage is not the requisite quality, what could it have
+ been that this stout-hearted Slade lacked?&mdash;this bloody, desperate,
+ kindly-mannered, urbane gentleman, who never hesitated to warn his most
+ ruffianly enemies that he would kill them whenever or wherever he came
+ across them next! I think it is a conundrum worth investigating.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch12" id="linkch12"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Just beyond the breakfast-station we overtook a Mormon emigrant train of
+ thirty-three wagons; and tramping wearily along and driving their herd of
+ loose cows, were dozens of coarse-clad and sad-looking men, women and
+ children, who had walked as they were walking now, day after day for eight
+ lingering weeks, and in that time had compassed the distance our stage had
+ come in eight days and three hours&mdash;seven hundred and ninety- eight
+ miles! They were dusty and uncombed, hatless, bonnetless and ragged, and
+ they did look so tired!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After breakfast, we bathed in Horse Creek, a (previously) limpid,
+ sparkling stream&mdash;an appreciated luxury, for it was very seldom that
+ our furious coach halted long enough for an indulgence of that kind. We
+ changed horses ten or twelve times in every twenty-four hours&mdash;changed
+ mules, rather&mdash;six mules&mdash;and did it nearly every time in four
+ minutes. It was lively work. As our coach rattled up to each station six
+ harnessed mules stepped gayly from the stable; and in the twinkling of an
+ eye, almost, the old team was out, and the new one in and we off and away
+ again.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ During the afternoon we passed Sweetwater Creek, Independence Rock,
+ Devil's Gate and the Devil's Gap. The latter were wild specimens of rugged
+ scenery, and full of interest&mdash;we were in the heart of the Rocky
+ Mountains, now. And we also passed by "Alkali" or "Soda Lake," and we woke
+ up to the fact that our journey had stretched a long way across the world
+ when the driver said that the Mormons often came there from Great Salt
+ Lake City to haul away saleratus. He said that a few days gone by they had
+ shoveled up enough pure saleratus from the ground (it was a dry lake) to
+ load two wagons, and that when they got these two wagons-loads of a drug
+ that cost them nothing, to Salt Lake, they could sell it for twenty-five
+ cents a pound.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In the night we sailed by a most notable curiosity, and one we had been
+ hearing a good deal about for a day or two, and were suffering to see.
+ This was what might be called a natural ice-house. It was August, now, and
+ sweltering weather in the daytime, yet at one of the stations the men
+ could scape the soil on the hill-side under the lee of a range of
+ boulders, and at a depth of six inches cut out pure blocks of ice&mdash;hard,
+ compactly frozen, and clear as crystal!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Toward dawn we got under way again, and presently as we sat with raised
+ curtains enjoying our early-morning smoke and contemplating the first
+ splendor of the rising sun as it swept down the long array of mountain
+ peaks, flushing and gilding crag after crag and summit after summit, as if
+ the invisible Creator reviewed his gray veterans and they saluted with a
+ smile, we hove in sight of South Pass City. The hotel-keeper, the
+ postmaster, the blacksmith, the mayor, the constable, the city marshal and
+ the principal citizen and property holder, all came out and greeted us
+ cheerily, and we gave him good day. He gave us a little Indian news, and a
+ little Rocky Mountain news, and we gave him some Plains information in
+ return. He then retired to his lonely grandeur and we climbed on up among
+ the bristling peaks and the ragged clouds. South Pass City consisted of
+ four log cabins, one if which was unfinished, and the gentleman with all
+ those offices and titles was the chiefest of the ten citizens of the
+ place. Think of hotel-keeper, postmaster, blacksmith, mayor, constable,
+ city marshal and principal citizen all condensed into one person and
+ crammed into one skin. Bemis said he was "a perfect Allen's revolver of
+ dignities." And he said that if he were to die as postmaster, or as
+ blacksmith, or as postmaster and blacksmith both, the people might stand
+ it; but if he were to die all over, it would be a frightful loss to the
+ community.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link099" id="link099"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="099.jpg (57K)" src="images/099.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Two miles beyond South Pass City we saw for the first time that mysterious
+ marvel which all Western untraveled boys have heard of and fully believe
+ in, but are sure to be astounded at when they see it with their own eyes,
+ nevertheless&mdash;banks of snow in dead summer time. We were now far up
+ toward the sky, and knew all the time that we must presently encounter
+ lofty summits clad in the "eternal snow" which was so common place a
+ matter of mention in books, and yet when I did see it glittering in the
+ sun on stately domes in the distance and knew the month was August and
+ that my coat was hanging up because it was too warm to wear it, I was full
+ as much amazed as if I never had heard of snow in August before. Truly,
+ "seeing is believing"&mdash;and many a man lives a long life through,
+ thinking he believes certain universally received and well established
+ things, and yet never suspects that if he were confronted by those things
+ once, he would discover that he did not really believe them before, but
+ only thought he believed them.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In a little while quite a number of peaks swung into view with long claws
+ of glittering snow clasping them; and with here and there, in the shade,
+ down the mountain side, a little solitary patch of snow looking no larger
+ than a lady's pocket-handkerchief but being in reality as large as a
+ "public square."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And now, at last, we were fairly in the renowned SOUTH PASS, and whirling
+ gayly along high above the common world. We were perched upon the extreme
+ summit of the great range of the Rocky Mountains, toward which we had been
+ climbing, patiently climbing, ceaselessly climbing, for days and nights
+ together&mdash;and about us was gathered a convention of Nature's kings
+ that stood ten, twelve, and even thirteen thousand feet high&mdash;grand
+ old fellows who would have to stoop to see Mount Washington, in the
+ twilight. We were in such an airy elevation above the creeping populations
+ of the earth, that now and then when the obstructing crags stood out of
+ the way it seemed that we could look around and abroad and contemplate the
+ whole great globe, with its dissolving views of mountains, seas and
+ continents stretching away through the mystery of the summer haze.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link100" id="link100"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="100.jpg (164K)" src="images/100.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ As a general thing the Pass was more suggestive of a valley than a
+ suspension bridge in the clouds&mdash;but it strongly suggested the latter
+ at one spot. At that place the upper third of one or two majestic purple
+ domes projected above our level on either hand and gave us a sense of a
+ hidden great deep of mountains and plains and valleys down about their
+ bases which we fancied we might see if we could step to the edge and look
+ over. These Sultans of the fastnesses were turbaned with tumbled volumes
+ of cloud, which shredded away from time to time and drifted off fringed
+ and torn, trailing their continents of shadow after them; and catching
+ presently on an intercepting peak, wrapped it about and brooded there&mdash;then
+ shredded away again and left the purple peak, as they had left the purple
+ domes, downy and white with new-laid snow. In passing, these monstrous
+ rags of cloud hung low and swept along right over the spectator's head,
+ swinging their tatters so nearly in his face that his impulse was to
+ shrink when they came closet. In the one place I speak of, one could look
+ below him upon a world of diminishing crags and canyons leading down,
+ down, and away to a vague plain with a thread in it which was a road, and
+ bunches of feathers in it which were trees,&mdash;a pretty picture
+ sleeping in the sunlight&mdash;but with a darkness stealing over it and
+ glooming its features deeper and deeper under the frown of a coming storm;
+ and then, while no film or shadow marred the noon brightness of his high
+ perch, he could watch the tempest break forth down there and see the
+ lightnings leap from crag to crag and the sheeted rain drive along the
+ canyon-sides, and hear the thunders peal and crash and roar. We had this
+ spectacle; a familiar one to many, but to us a novelty.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link101" id="link101"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="101.jpg (164K)" src="images/101.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We bowled along cheerily, and presently, at the very summit (though it had
+ been all summit to us, and all equally level, for half an hour or more),
+ we came to a spring which spent its water through two outlets and sent it
+ in opposite directions. The conductor said that one of those streams which
+ we were looking at, was just starting on a journey westward to the Gulf of
+ California and the Pacific Ocean, through hundreds and even thousands of
+ miles of desert solitudes. He said that the other was just leaving its
+ home among the snow-peaks on a similar journey eastward&mdash;and we knew
+ that long after we should have forgotten the simple rivulet it would still
+ be plodding its patient way down the mountain sides, and canyon-beds, and
+ between the banks of the Yellowstone; and by and by would join the broad
+ Missouri and flow through unknown plains and deserts and unvisited
+ wildernesses; and add a long and troubled pilgrimage among snags and
+ wrecks and sandbars; and enter the Mississippi, touch the wharves of St.
+ Louis and still drift on, traversing shoals and rocky channels, then
+ endless chains of bottomless and ample bends, walled with unbroken
+ forests, then mysterious byways and secret passages among woody islands,
+ then the chained bends again, bordered with wide levels of shining
+ sugar-cane in place of the sombre forests; then by New Orleans and still
+ other chains of bends&mdash;and finally, after two long months of daily
+ and nightly harassment, excitement, enjoyment, adventure, and awful peril
+ of parched throats, pumps and evaporation, pass the Gulf and enter into
+ its rest upon the bosom of the tropic sea, never to look upon its
+ snow-peaks again or regret them.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I freighted a leaf with a mental message for the friends at home, and
+ dropped it in the stream. But I put no stamp on it and it was held for
+ postage somewhere.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On the summit we overtook an emigrant train of many wagons, many tired men
+ and women, and many a disgusted sheep and cow.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In the wofully dusty horseman in charge of the expedition I recognized
+ John &mdash;&mdash;. Of all persons in the world to meet on top of the
+ Rocky Mountains thousands of miles from home, he was the last one I should
+ have looked for. We were school-boys together and warm friends for years.
+ But a boyish prank of mine had disruptured this friendship and it had
+ never been renewed. The act of which I speak was this. I had been
+ accustomed to visit occasionally an editor whose room was in the third
+ story of a building and overlooked the street. One day this editor gave me
+ a watermelon which I made preparations to devour on the spot, but chancing
+ to look out of the window, I saw John standing directly under it and an
+ irresistible desire came upon me to drop the melon on his head, which I
+ immediately did. I was the loser, for it spoiled the melon, and John never
+ forgave me and we dropped all intercourse and parted, but now met again
+ under these circumstances.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link102" id="link102"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="102.jpg (41K)" src="images/102.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We recognized each other simultaneously, and hands were grasped as warmly
+ as if no coldness had ever existed between us, and no allusion was made to
+ any. All animosities were buried and the simple fact of meeting a familiar
+ face in that isolated spot so far from home, was sufficient to make us
+ forget all things but pleasant ones, and we parted again with sincere
+ "good-bye" and "God bless you" from both.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We had been climbing up the long shoulders of the Rocky Mountains for many
+ tedious hours&mdash;we started down them, now. And we went spinning away
+ at a round rate too.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We left the snowy Wind River Mountains and Uinta Mountains behind, and
+ sped away, always through splendid scenery but occasionally through long
+ ranks of white skeletons of mules and oxen&mdash;monuments of the huge
+ emigration of other days&mdash;and here and there were up-ended boards or
+ small piles of stones which the driver said marked the resting-place of
+ more precious remains.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was the loneliest land for a grave! A land given over to the cayote and
+ the raven&mdash;which is but another name for desolation and utter
+ solitude. On damp, murky nights, these scattered skeletons gave forth a
+ soft, hideous glow, like very faint spots of moonlight starring the vague
+ desert. It was because of the phosphorus in the bones. But no scientific
+ explanation could keep a body from shivering when he drifted by one of
+ those ghostly lights and knew that a skull held it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link103" id="link103"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="103.jpg (35K)" src="images/103.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At midnight it began to rain, and I never saw anything like it&mdash;indeed,
+ I did not even see this, for it was too dark. We fastened down the
+ curtains and even caulked them with clothing, but the rain streamed in in
+ twenty places, nothwithstanding. There was no escape. If one moved his
+ feet out of a stream, he brought his body under one; and if he moved his
+ body he caught one somewhere else. If he struggled out of the drenched
+ blankets and sat up, he was bound to get one down the back of his neck.
+ Meantime the stage was wandering about a plain with gaping gullies in it,
+ for the driver could not see an inch before his face nor keep the road,
+ and the storm pelted so pitilessly that there was no keeping the horses
+ still. With the first abatement the conductor turned out with lanterns to
+ look for the road, and the first dash he made was into a chasm about
+ fourteen feet deep, his lantern following like a meteor. As soon as he
+ touched bottom he sang out frantically:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link104" id="link104"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="104.jpg (30K)" src="images/104.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Don't come here!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ To which the driver, who was looking over the precipice where he had
+ disappeared, replied, with an injured air: "Think I'm a dam fool?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link105" id="link105"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="105.jpg (30K)" src="images/105.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The conductor was more than an hour finding the road&mdash;a matter which
+ showed us how far we had wandered and what chances we had been taking. He
+ traced our wheel-tracks to the imminent verge of danger, in two places. I
+ have always been glad that we were not killed that night. I do not know
+ any particular reason, but I have always been glad. In the morning, the
+ tenth day out, we crossed Green River, a fine, large, limpid stream&mdash;stuck
+ in it with the water just up to the top of our mail- bed, and waited till
+ extra teams were put on to haul us up the steep bank. But it was nice cool
+ water, and besides it could not find any fresh place on us to wet.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At the Green River station we had breakfast&mdash;hot biscuits, fresh
+ antelope steaks, and coffee&mdash;the only decent meal we tasted between
+ the United States and Great Salt Lake City, and the only one we were ever
+ really thankful for.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Think of the monotonous execrableness of the thirty that went before it,
+ to leave this one simple breakfast looming up in my memory like a shot-
+ tower after all these years have gone by!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At five P.M. we reached Fort Bridger, one hundred and seventeen miles from
+ the South Pass, and one thousand and twenty-five miles from St. Joseph.
+ Fifty-two miles further on, near the head of Echo Canyon, we met sixty
+ United States soldiers from Camp Floyd. The day before, they had fired
+ upon three hundred or four hundred Indians, whom they supposed gathered
+ together for no good purpose. In the fight that had ensued, four Indians
+ were captured, and the main body chased four miles, but nobody killed.
+ This looked like business. We had a notion to get out and join the sixty
+ soldiers, but upon reflecting that there were four hundred of the Indians,
+ we concluded to go on and join the Indians.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Echo Canyon is twenty miles long. It was like a long, smooth, narrow
+ street, with a gradual descending grade, and shut in by enormous
+ perpendicular walls of coarse conglomerate, four hundred feet high in many
+ places, and turreted like mediaeval castles. This was the most faultless
+ piece of road in the mountains, and the driver said he would "let his team
+ out." He did, and if the Pacific express trains whiz through there now any
+ faster than we did then in the stage-coach, I envy the passengers the
+ exhilaration of it. We fairly seemed to pick up our wheels and fly&mdash;and
+ the mail matter was lifted up free from everything and held in solution! I
+ am not given to exaggeration, and when I say a thing I mean it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ However, time presses. At four in the afternoon we arrived on the summit
+ of Big Mountain, fifteen miles from Salt Lake City, when all the world was
+ glorified with the setting sun, and the most stupendous panorama of
+ mountain peaks yet encountered burst on our sight. We looked out upon this
+ sublime spectacle from under the arch of a brilliant rainbow! Even the
+ overland stage-driver stopped his horses and gazed!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Half an hour or an hour later, we changed horses, and took supper with a
+ Mormon "Destroying Angel."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Destroying Angels," as I understand it, are Latter-Day Saints who are set
+ apart by the Church to conduct permanent disappearances of obnoxious
+ citizens. I had heard a deal about these Mormon Destroying Angels and the
+ dark and bloody deeds they had done, and when I entered this one's house I
+ had my shudder all ready. But alas for all our romances, he was nothing
+ but a loud, profane, offensive, old blackguard! He was murderous enough,
+ possibly, to fill the bill of a Destroyer, but would you have any kind of
+ an Angel devoid of dignity? Could you abide an Angel in an unclean shirt
+ and no suspenders? Could you respect an Angel with a horse-laugh and a
+ swagger like a buccaneer?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link106" id="link106"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="106.jpg (47K)" src="images/106.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There were other blackguards present&mdash;comrades of this one. And there
+ was one person that looked like a gentleman&mdash;Heber C. Kimball's son,
+ tall and well made, and thirty years old, perhaps. A lot of slatternly
+ women flitted hither and thither in a hurry, with coffee-pots, plates of
+ bread, and other appurtenances to supper, and these were said to be the
+ wives of the Angel&mdash;or some of them, at least. And of course they
+ were; for if they had been hired "help" they would not have let an angel
+ from above storm and swear at them as he did, let alone one from the place
+ this one hailed from.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This was our first experience of the western "peculiar institution," and
+ it was not very prepossessing. We did not tarry long to observe it, but
+ hurried on to the home of the Latter-Day Saints, the stronghold of the
+ prophets, the capital of the only absolute monarch in America&mdash;Great
+ Salt Lake City. As the night closed in we took sanctuary in the Salt Lake
+ House and unpacked our baggage.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch13" id="linkch13"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We had a fine supper, of the freshest meats and fowls and vegetables&mdash;a
+ great variety and as great abundance. We walked about the streets some,
+ afterward, and glanced in at shops and stores; and there was fascination
+ in surreptitiously staring at every creature we took to be a Mormon. This
+ was fairy-land to us, to all intents and purposes&mdash;a land of
+ enchantment, and goblins, and awful mystery. We felt a curiosity to ask
+ every child how many mothers it had, and if it could tell them apart; and
+ we experienced a thrill every time a dwelling-house door opened and shut
+ as we passed, disclosing a glimpse of human heads and backs and shoulders&mdash;for
+ we so longed to have a good satisfying look at a Mormon family in all its
+ comprehensive ampleness, disposed in the customary concentric rings of its
+ home circle.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By and by the Acting Governor of the Territory introduced us to other
+ "Gentiles," and we spent a sociable hour with them. "Gentiles" are people
+ who are not Mormons. Our fellow-passenger, Bemis, took care of himself,
+ during this part of the evening, and did not make an overpowering success
+ of it, either, for he came into our room in the hotel about eleven
+ o'clock, full of cheerfulness, and talking loosely, disjointedly and
+ indiscriminately, and every now and then tugging out a ragged word by the
+ roots that had more hiccups than syllables in it. This, together with his
+ hanging his coat on the floor on one side of a chair, and his vest on the
+ floor on the other side, and piling his pants on the floor just in front
+ of the same chair, and then comtemplating the general result with
+ superstitious awe, and finally pronouncing it "too many for him" and going
+ to bed with his boots on, led us to fear that something he had eaten had
+ not agreed with him.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But we knew afterward that it was something he had been drinking. It was
+ the exclusively Mormon refresher, "valley tan."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Valley tan (or, at least, one form of valley tan) is a kind of whisky, or
+ first cousin to it; is of Mormon invention and manufactured only in Utah.
+ Tradition says it is made of (imported) fire and brimstone. If I remember
+ rightly no public drinking saloons were allowed in the kingdom by Brigham
+ Young, and no private drinking permitted among the faithful, except they
+ confined themselves to "valley tan."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link109" id="link109"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="109.jpg (55K)" src="images/109.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next day we strolled about everywhere through the broad, straight, level
+ streets, and enjoyed the pleasant strangeness of a city of fifteen
+ thousand inhabitants with no loafers perceptible in it; and no visible
+ drunkards or noisy people; a limpid stream rippling and dancing through
+ every street in place of a filthy gutter; block after block of trim
+ dwellings, built of "frame" and sunburned brick&mdash;a great thriving
+ orchard and garden behind every one of them, apparently&mdash;branches
+ from the street stream winding and sparkling among the garden beds and
+ fruit trees&mdash;and a grand general air of neatness, repair, thrift and
+ comfort, around and about and over the whole. And everywhere were
+ workshops, factories, and all manner of industries; and intent faces and
+ busy hands were to be seen wherever one looked; and in one's ears was the
+ ceaseless clink of hammers, the buzz of trade and the contented hum of
+ drums and fly-wheels.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link110a" id="link110a"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="110a.jpg (25K)" src="images/110a.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The armorial crest of my own State consisted of two dissolute bears
+ holding up the head of a dead and gone cask between them and making the
+ pertinent remark, "UNITED, WE STAND&mdash;(hic!)&mdash;DIVIDED, WE FALL."
+ It was always too figurative for the author of this book. But the Mormon
+ crest was easy. And it was simple, unostentatious, and fitted like a
+ glove. It was a representation of a GOLDEN BEEHIVE, with the bees all at
+ work!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link110b" id="link110b"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="110b.jpg (23K)" src="images/110b.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The city lies in the edge of a level plain as broad as the State of
+ Connecticut, and crouches close down to the ground under a curving wall of
+ mighty mountains whose heads are hidden in the clouds, and whose shoulders
+ bear relics of the snows of winter all the summer long.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Seen from one of these dizzy heights, twelve or fifteen miles off, Great
+ Salt Lake City is toned down and diminished till it is suggestive of a
+ child's toy-village reposing under the majestic protection of the Chinese
+ wall.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On some of those mountains, to the southwest, it had been raining every
+ day for two weeks, but not a drop had fallen in the city. And on hot days
+ in late spring and early autumn the citizens could quit fanning and
+ growling and go out and cool off by looking at the luxury of a glorious
+ snow-storm going on in the mountains. They could enjoy it at a distance,
+ at those seasons, every day, though no snow would fall in their streets,
+ or anywhere near them.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link111" id="link111"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="111.jpg (83K)" src="images/111.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Salt Lake City was healthy&mdash;an extremely healthy city. They declared
+ there was only one physician in the place and he was arrested every week
+ regularly and held to answer under the vagrant act for having "no visible
+ means of support." They always give you a good substantial article of
+ truth in Salt Lake, and good measure and good weight, too. [Very often, if
+ you wished to weigh one of their airiest little commonplace statements you
+ would want the hay scales.]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We desired to visit the famous inland sea, the American "Dead Sea," the
+ great Salt Lake&mdash;seventeen miles, horseback, from the city&mdash;for
+ we had dreamed about it, and thought about it, and talked about it, and
+ yearned to see it, all the first part of our trip; but now when it was
+ only arm's length away it had suddenly lost nearly every bit of its
+ interest. And so we put it off, in a sort of general way, till next day&mdash;and
+ that was the last we ever thought of it. We dined with some hospitable
+ Gentiles; and visited the foundation of the prodigious temple; and talked
+ long with that shrewd Connecticut Yankee, Heber C. Kimball (since
+ deceased), a saint of high degree and a mighty man of commerce.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link112" id="link112"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="112.jpg (21K)" src="images/112.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We saw the "Tithing-House," and the "Lion House," and I do not know or
+ remember how many more church and government buildings of various kinds
+ and curious names. We flitted hither and thither and enjoyed every hour,
+ and picked up a great deal of useful information and entertaining
+ nonsense, and went to bed at night satisfied.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The second day, we made the acquaintance of Mr. Street (since deceased)
+ and put on white shirts and went and paid a state visit to the king. He
+ seemed a quiet, kindly, easy-mannered, dignified, self-possessed old
+ gentleman of fifty-five or sixty, and had a gentle craft in his eye that
+ probably belonged there. He was very simply dressed and was just taking
+ off a straw hat as we entered. He talked about Utah, and the Indians, and
+ Nevada, and general American matters and questions, with our secretary and
+ certain government officials who came with us. But he never paid any
+ attention to me, notwithstanding I made several attempts to "draw him out"
+ on federal politics and his high handed attitude toward Congress. I
+ thought some of the things I said were rather fine. But he merely looked
+ around at me, at distant intervals, something as I have seen a benignant
+ old cat look around to see which kitten was meddling with her tail.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By and by I subsided into an indignant silence, and so sat until the end,
+ hot and flushed, and execrating him in my heart for an ignorant savage.
+ But he was calm. His conversation with those gentlemen flowed on as
+ sweetly and peacefully and musically as any summer brook. When the
+ audience was ended and we were retiring from the presence, he put his hand
+ on my head, beamed down on me in an admiring way and said to my brother:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Ah&mdash;your child, I presume? Boy, or girl?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link113" id="link113"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="113.jpg (49K)" src="images/113.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch14" id="linkch14"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XIV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Mr. Street was very busy with his telegraphic matters&mdash;and
+ considering that he had eight or nine hundred miles of rugged, snowy,
+ uninhabited mountains, and waterless, treeless, melancholy deserts to
+ traverse with his wire, it was natural and needful that he should be as
+ busy as possible. He could not go comfortably along and cut his poles by
+ the road-side, either, but they had to be hauled by ox teams across those
+ exhausting deserts&mdash;and it was two days' journey from water to water,
+ in one or two of them. Mr. Street's contract was a vast work, every way
+ one looked at it; and yet to comprehend what the vague words "eight
+ hundred miles of rugged mountains and dismal deserts" mean, one must go
+ over the ground in person&mdash;pen and ink descriptions cannot convey the
+ dreary reality to the reader. And after all, Mr. S.'s mightiest difficulty
+ turned out to be one which he had never taken into the account at all.
+ Unto Mormons he had sub-let the hardest and heaviest half of his great
+ undertaking, and all of a sudden they concluded that they were going to
+ make little or nothing, and so they tranquilly threw their poles overboard
+ in mountain or desert, just as it happened when they took the notion, and
+ drove home and went about their customary business! They were under
+ written contract to Mr. Street, but they did not care anything for that.
+ They said they would "admire" to see a "Gentile" force a Mormon to fulfil
+ a losing contract in Utah! And they made themselves very merry over the
+ matter. Street said&mdash;for it was he that told us these things:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I was in dismay. I was under heavy bonds to complete my contract in a
+ given time, and this disaster looked very much like ruin. It was an
+ astounding thing; it was such a wholly unlooked-for difficulty, that I was
+ entirely nonplussed. I am a business man&mdash;have always been a business
+ man&mdash;do not know anything but business&mdash;and so you can imagine
+ how like being struck by lightning it was to find myself in a country
+ where written contracts were worthless!&mdash;that main security, that
+ sheet- anchor, that absolute necessity, of business. My confidence left
+ me. There was no use in making new contracts&mdash;that was plain. I
+ talked with first one prominent citizen and then another. They all
+ sympathized with me, first rate, but they did not know how to help me. But
+ at last a Gentile said, 'Go to Brigham Young!&mdash;these small fry cannot
+ do you any good.' I did not think much of the idea, for if the law could
+ not help me, what could an individual do who had not even anything to do
+ with either making the laws or executing them? He might be a very good
+ patriarch of a church and preacher in its tabernacle, but something
+ sterner than religion and moral suasion was needed to handle a hundred
+ refractory, half-civilized sub-contractors. But what was a man to do? I
+ thought if Mr. Young could not do anything else, he might probably be able
+ to give me some advice and a valuable hint or two, and so I went straight
+ to him and laid the whole case before him. He said very little, but he
+ showed strong interest all the way through. He examined all the papers in
+ detail, and whenever there seemed anything like a hitch, either in the
+ papers or my statement, he would go back and take up the thread and follow
+ it patiently out to an intelligent and satisfactory result. Then he made a
+ list of the contractors' names. Finally he said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "'Mr. Street, this is all perfectly plain. These contracts are strictly
+ and legally drawn, and are duly signed and certified. These men manifestly
+ entered into them with their eyes open. I see no fault or flaw anywhere.'
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Then Mr. Young turned to a man waiting at the other end of the room and
+ said: 'Take this list of names to So-and-so, and tell him to have these
+ men here at such-and-such an hour.'
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "They were there, to the minute. So was I. Mr. Young asked them a number
+ of questions, and their answers made my statement good. Then he said to
+ them:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "'You signed these contracts and assumed these obligations of your own
+ free will and accord?'
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "'Yes.'
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "'Then carry them out to the letter, if it makes paupers of you! Go!'
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link116" id="link116"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="116.jpg (101K)" src="images/116.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "And they did go, too! They are strung across the deserts now, working
+ like bees. And I never hear a word out of them.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "There is a batch of governors, and judges, and other officials here,
+ shipped from Washington, and they maintain the semblance of a republican
+ form of government&mdash;but the petrified truth is that Utah is an
+ absolute monarchy and Brigham Young is king!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Mr. Street was a fine man, and I believe his story. I knew him well during
+ several years afterward in San Francisco.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Our stay in Salt Lake City amounted to only two days, and therefore we had
+ no time to make the customary inquisition into the workings of polygamy
+ and get up the usual statistics and deductions preparatory to calling the
+ attention of the nation at large once more to the matter.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link117" id="link117"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="117.jpg (104K)" src="images/117.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I had the will to do it. With the gushing self-sufficiency of youth I was
+ feverish to plunge in headlong and achieve a great reform here&mdash;until
+ I saw the Mormon women. Then I was touched. My heart was wiser than my
+ head. It warmed toward these poor, ungainly and pathetically "homely"
+ creatures, and as I turned to hide the generous moisture in my eyes, I
+ said, "No&mdash;the man that marries one of them has done an act of
+ Christian charity which entitles him to the kindly applause of mankind,
+ not their harsh censure&mdash;and the man that marries sixty of them has
+ done a deed of open-handed generosity so sublime that the nations should
+ stand uncovered in his presence and worship in silence."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ [For a brief sketch of Mormon history, and the noted Mountain Meadow
+ massacre, see Appendices A and B. ]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link118" id="link118"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="118.jpg (82K)" src="images/118.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch15" id="linkch15"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It is a luscious country for thrilling evening stories about
+ assassinations of intractable Gentiles. I cannot easily conceive of
+ anything more cosy than the night in Salt Lake which we spent in a Gentile
+ den, smoking pipes and listening to tales of how Burton galloped in among
+ the pleading and defenceless "Morisites" and shot them down, men and
+ women, like so many dogs. And how Bill Hickman, a Destroying Angel, shot
+ Drown and Arnold dead for bringing suit against him for a debt. And how
+ Porter Rockwell did this and that dreadful thing. And how heedless people
+ often come to Utah and make remarks about Brigham, or polygamy, or some
+ other sacred matter, and the very next morning at daylight such parties
+ are sure to be found lying up some back alley, contentedly waiting for the
+ hearse.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And the next most interesting thing is to sit and listen to these Gentiles
+ talk about polygamy; and how some portly old frog of an elder, or a
+ bishop, marries a girl&mdash;likes her, marries her sister&mdash;likes
+ her, marries another sister&mdash;likes her, takes another&mdash;likes
+ her, marries her mother&mdash;likes her, marries her father, grandfather,
+ great grandfather, and then comes back hungry and asks for more. And how
+ the pert young thing of eleven will chance to be the favorite wife and her
+ own venerable grandmother have to rank away down toward D 4 in their
+ mutual husband's esteem, and have to sleep in the kitchen, as like as not.
+ And how this dreadful sort of thing, this hiving together in one foul nest
+ of mother and daughters, and the making a young daughter superior to her
+ own mother in rank and authority, are things which Mormon women submit to
+ because their religion teaches them that the more wives a man has on
+ earth, and the more children he rears, the higher the place they will all
+ have in the world to come&mdash;and the warmer, maybe, though they do not
+ seem to say anything about that.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link120" id="link120"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="120.jpg (96K)" src="images/120.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ According to these Gentile friends of ours, Brigham Young's harem contains
+ twenty or thirty wives. They said that some of them had grown old and gone
+ out of active service, but were comfortably housed and cared for in the
+ henery&mdash;or the Lion House, as it is strangely named. Along with each
+ wife were her children&mdash;fifty altogether. The house was perfectly
+ quiet and orderly, when the children were still. They all took their meals
+ in one room, and a happy and home-like sight it was pronounced to be. None
+ of our party got an opportunity to take dinner with Mr. Young, but a
+ Gentile by the name of Johnson professed to have enjoyed a sociable
+ breakfast in the Lion House. He gave a preposterous account of the
+ "calling of the roll," and other preliminaries, and the carnage that
+ ensued when the buckwheat cakes came in. But he embellished rather too
+ much. He said that Mr. Young told him several smart sayings of certain of
+ his "two-year-olds," observing with some pride that for many years he had
+ been the heaviest contributor in that line to one of the Eastern
+ magazines; and then he wanted to show Mr. Johnson one of the pets that had
+ said the last good thing, but he could not find the child.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He searched the faces of the children in detail, but could not decide
+ which one it was. Finally he gave it up with a sigh and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link121" id="link121"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="121.jpg (86K)" src="images/121.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I thought I would know the little cub again but I don't." Mr. Johnson
+ said further, that Mr. Young observed that life was a sad, sad thing&mdash;"because
+ the joy of every new marriage a man contracted was so apt to be blighted
+ by the inopportune funeral of a less recent bride." And Mr. Johnson said
+ that while he and Mr. Young were pleasantly conversing in private, one of
+ the Mrs. Youngs came in and demanded a breast-pin, remarking that she had
+ found out that he had been giving a breast-pin to No. 6, and she, for one,
+ did not propose to let this partiality go on without making a satisfactory
+ amount of trouble about it. Mr. Young reminded her that there was a
+ stranger present. Mrs. Young said that if the state of things inside the
+ house was not agreeable to the stranger, he could find room outside. Mr.
+ Young promised the breast-pin, and she went away. But in a minute or two
+ another Mrs. Young came in and demanded a breast-pin. Mr. Young began a
+ remonstrance, but Mrs. Young cut him short. She said No. 6 had got one,
+ and No. 11 was promised one, and it was "no use for him to try to impose
+ on her&mdash;she hoped she knew her rights." He gave his promise, and she
+ went. And presently three Mrs. Youngs entered in a body and opened on
+ their husband a tempest of tears, abuse, and entreaty. They had heard all
+ about No. 6, No. 11, and No. 14. Three more breast-pins were promised.
+ They were hardly gone when nine more Mrs. Youngs filed into the presence,
+ and a new tempest burst forth and raged round about the prophet and his
+ guest. Nine breast-pins were promised, and the weird sisters filed out
+ again. And in came eleven more, weeping and wailing and gnashing their
+ teeth. Eleven promised breast-pins purchased peace once more.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "That is a specimen," said Mr. Young. "You see how it is. You see what a
+ life I lead. A man can't be wise all the time. In a heedless moment I gave
+ my darling No. 6&mdash;excuse my calling her thus, as her other name has
+ escaped me for the moment&mdash;a breast-pin. It was only worth
+ twenty-five dollars&mdash;that is, apparently that was its whole cost&mdash;but
+ its ultimate cost was inevitably bound to be a good deal more. You
+ yourself have seen it climb up to six hundred and fifty dollars&mdash;and
+ alas, even that is not the end! For I have wives all over this Territory
+ of Utah. I have dozens of wives whose numbers, even, I do not know without
+ looking in the family Bible. They are scattered far and wide among the
+ mountains and valleys of my realm. And mark you, every solitary one of
+ them will hear of this wretched breast pin, and every last one of them
+ will have one or die. No. 6's breast pin will cost me twenty-five hundred
+ dollars before I see the end of it. And these creatures will compare these
+ pins together, and if one is a shade finer than the rest, they will all be
+ thrown on my hands, and I will have to order a new lot to keep peace in
+ the family. Sir, you probably did not know it, but all the time you were
+ present with my children your every movement was watched by vigilant
+ servitors of mine. If you had offered to give a child a dime, or a stick
+ of candy, or any trifle of the kind, you would have been snatched out of
+ the house instantly, provided it could be done before your gift left your
+ hand. Otherwise it would be absolutely necessary for you to make an
+ exactly similar gift to all my children&mdash;and knowing by experience
+ the importance of the thing, I would have stood by and seen to it myself
+ that you did it, and did it thoroughly. Once a gentleman gave one of my
+ children a tin whistle&mdash;a veritable invention of Satan, sir, and one
+ which I have an unspeakable horror of, and so would you if you had eighty
+ or ninety children in your house. But the deed was done&mdash;the man
+ escaped. I knew what the result was going to be, and I thirsted for
+ vengeance. I ordered out a flock of Destroying Angels, and they hunted the
+ man far into the fastnesses of the Nevada mountains. But they never caught
+ him. I am not cruel, sir&mdash;I am not vindictive except when sorely
+ outraged&mdash;but if I had caught him, sir, so help me Joseph Smith, I
+ would have locked him into the nursery till the brats whistled him to
+ death. By the slaughtered body of St. Parley Pratt (whom God assail!)
+ there was never anything on this earth like it! I knew who gave the
+ whistle to the child, but I could, not make those jealous mothers believe
+ me. They believed I did it, and the result was just what any man of
+ reflection could have foreseen: I had to order a hundred and ten whistles&mdash;I
+ think we had a hundred and ten children in the house then, but some of
+ them are off at college now&mdash;I had to order a hundred and ten of
+ those shrieking things, and I wish I may never speak another word if we
+ didn't have to talk on our fingers entirely, from that time forth until
+ the children got tired of the whistles. And if ever another man gives a
+ whistle to a child of mine and I get my hands on him, I will hang him
+ higher than Haman! That is the word with the bark on it! Shade of Nephi!
+ You don't know anything about married life. I am rich, and everybody knows
+ it. I am benevolent, and everybody takes advantage of it. I have a strong
+ fatherly instinct and all the foundlings are foisted on me.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Every time a woman wants to do well by her darling, she puzzles her brain
+ to cipher out some scheme for getting it into my hands. Why, sir, a woman
+ came here once with a child of a curious lifeless sort of complexion (and
+ so had the woman), and swore that the child was mine and she my wife&mdash;that
+ I had married her at such-and-such a time in such-and- such a place, but
+ she had forgotten her number, and of course I could not remember her name.
+ Well, sir, she called my attention to the fact that the child looked like
+ me, and really it did seem to resemble me&mdash;a common thing in the
+ Territory&mdash;and, to cut the story short, I put it in my nursery, and
+ she left.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link124" id="link124"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="124.jpg (68K)" src="images/124.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And by the ghost of Orson Hyde, when they came to wash the paint off that
+ child it was an Injun! Bless my soul, you don't know anything about
+ married life. It is a perfect dog's life, sir&mdash;a perfect dog's life.
+ You can't economize. It isn't possible. I have tried keeping one set of
+ bridal attire for all occasions. But it is of no use. First you'll marry a
+ combination of calico and consumption that's as thin as a rail, and next
+ you'll get a creature that's nothing more than the dropsy in disguise, and
+ then you've got to eke out that bridal dress with an old balloon. That is
+ the way it goes. And think of the wash-bill&mdash;(excuse these tears)&mdash;nine
+ hundred and eighty-four pieces a week! No, sir, there is no such a thing
+ as economy in a family like mine. Why, just the one item of cradles&mdash;think
+ of it! And vermifuge! Soothing syrup! Teething rings! And 'papa's watches'
+ for the babies to play with! And things to scratch the furniture with! And
+ lucifer matches for them to eat, and pieces of glass to cut themselves
+ with! The item of glass alone would support your family, I venture to say,
+ sir. Let me scrimp and squeeze all I can, I still can't get ahead as fast
+ as I feel I ought to, with my opportunities. Bless you, sir, at a time
+ when I had seventy-two wives in this house, I groaned under the pressure
+ of keeping thousands of dollars tied up in seventy-two bedsteads when the
+ money ought to have been out at interest; and I just sold out the whole
+ stock, sir, at a sacrifice, and built a bedstead seven feet long and
+ ninety-six feet wide.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link126" id="link126"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="126.jpg (99K)" src="images/126.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But it was a failure, sir. I could not sleep. It appeared to me that the
+ whole seventy-two women snored at once. The roar was deafening. And then
+ the danger of it! That was what I was looking at. They would all draw in
+ their breath at once, and you could actually see the walls of the house
+ suck in&mdash;and then they would all exhale their breath at once, and you
+ could see the walls swell out, and strain, and hear the rafters crack, and
+ the shingles grind together. My friend, take an old man's advice, and
+ don't encumber yourself with a large family&mdash;mind, I tell you, don't
+ do it. In a small family, and in a small family only, you will find that
+ comfort and that peace of mind which are the best at last of the blessings
+ this world is able to afford us, and for the lack of which no accumulation
+ of wealth, and no acquisition of fame, power, and greatness can ever
+ compensate us. Take my word for it, ten or eleven wives is all you need&mdash;never
+ go over it."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Some instinct or other made me set this Johnson down as being unreliable.
+ And yet he was a very entertaining person, and I doubt if some of the
+ information he gave us could have been acquired from any other source. He
+ was a pleasant contrast to those reticent Mormons.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch16" id="linkch16"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XVI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ All men have heard of the Mormon Bible, but few except the "elect" have
+ seen it, or, at least, taken the trouble to read it. I brought away a copy
+ from Salt Lake. The book is a curiosity to me, it is such a pretentious
+ affair, and yet so "slow," so sleepy; such an insipid mess of inspiration.
+ It is chloroform in print. If Joseph Smith composed this book, the act was
+ a miracle&mdash;keeping awake while he did it was, at any rate. If he,
+ according to tradition, merely translated it from certain ancient and
+ mysteriously-engraved plates of copper, which he declares he found under a
+ stone, in an out-of-the-way locality, the work of translating was equally
+ a miracle, for the same reason.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The book seems to be merely a prosy detail of imaginary history, with the
+ Old Testament for a model; followed by a tedious plagiarism of the New
+ Testament. The author labored to give his words and phrases the quaint,
+ old-fashioned sound and structure of our King James's translation of the
+ Scriptures; and the result is a mongrel&mdash;half modern glibness, and
+ half ancient simplicity and gravity. The latter is awkward and
+ constrained; the former natural, but grotesque by the contrast. Whenever
+ he found his speech growing too modern&mdash;which was about every
+ sentence or two&mdash;he ladled in a few such Scriptural phrases as
+ "exceeding sore," "and it came to pass," etc., and made things
+ satisfactory again. "And it came to pass" was his pet. If he had left that
+ out, his Bible would have been only a pamphlet.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The title-page reads as follows:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ THE BOOK OF MORMON: AN ACCOUNT WRITTEN BY THE HAND OF MORMON, UPON
+ PLATES TAKEN FROM THE PLATES OF NEPHI.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Wherefore it is an abridgment of the record of the people of Nephi, and
+ also of the Lamanites; written to the Lamanites, who are a remnant of
+ the House of Israel; and also to Jew and Gentile; written by way of
+ commandment, and also by the spirit of prophecy and of revelation.
+ Written and sealed up, and hid up unto the Lord, that they might not be
+ destroyed; to come forth by the gift and power of God unto the
+ interpretation thereof; sealed by the hand of Moroni, and hid up unto
+ the Lord, to come forth in due time by the way of Gentile; the
+ interpretation thereof by the gift of God. An abridgment taken from the
+ Book of Ether also; which is a record of the people of Jared; who were
+ scattered at the time the Lord confounded the language of the people
+ when they were building a tower to get to Heaven.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "Hid up" is good. And so is "wherefore"&mdash;though why "wherefore"? Any
+ other word would have answered as well&mdash;though&mdash;in truth it
+ would not have sounded so Scriptural.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next comes:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ THE TESTIMONY OF THREE WITNESSES. Be it known unto all nations,
+ kindreds, tongues, and people unto whom this work shall come, that we,
+ through the grace of God the Father, and our Lord Jesus Christ, have
+ seen the plates which contain this record, which is a record of the
+ people of Nephi, and also of the Lamanites, their brethren, and also of
+ the people of Jared, who came from the tower of which hath been spoken;
+ and we also know that they have been translated by the gift and power of
+ God, for His voice hath declared it unto us; wherefore we know of a
+ surety that the work is true. And we also testify that we have seen the
+ engravings which are upon the plates; and they have been shown unto us
+ by the power of God, and not of man. And we declare with words of
+ soberness, that an angel of God came down from heaven, and he brought
+ and laid before our eyes, that we beheld and saw the plates, and the
+ engravings thereon; and we know that it is by the grace of God the
+ Father, and our Lord Jesus Christ, that we beheld and bear record that
+ these things are true; and it is marvellous in our eyes; nevertheless
+ the voice of the Lord commanded us that we should bear record of it;
+ wherefore, to be obedient unto the commandments of God, we bear
+ testimony of these things. And we know that if we are faithful in
+ Christ, we shall rid our garments of the blood of all men, and be found
+ spotless before the judgment-seat of Christ, and shall dwell with Him
+ eternally in the heavens. And the honor be to the Father, and to the
+ Son, and to the Holy Ghost, which is one God. Amen. OLIVER COWDERY,
+ DAVID WHITMER, MARTIN HARRIS.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ Some people have to have a world of evidence before they can come anywhere
+ in the neighborhood of believing anything; but for me, when a man tells me
+ that he has "seen the engravings which are upon the plates," and not only
+ that, but an angel was there at the time, and saw him see them, and
+ probably took his receipt for it, I am very far on the road to conviction,
+ no matter whether I ever heard of that man before or not, and even if I do
+ not know the name of the angel, or his nationality either.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next is this:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ AND ALSO THE TESTIMONY OF EIGHT WITNESSES. Be it known unto all nations,
+ kindreds, tongues, and people unto whom this work shall come, that
+ Joseph Smith, Jr., the translator of this work, has shown unto us the
+ plates of which hath been spoken, which have the appearance of gold; and
+ as many of the leaves as the said Smith has translated, we did handle
+ with our hands; and we also saw the engravings thereon, all of which has
+ the appearance of ancient work, and of curious workmanship. And this we
+ bear record with words of soberness, that the said Smith has shown unto
+ us, for we have seen and hefted, and know of a surety that the said
+ Smith has got the plates of which we have spoken. And we give our names
+ unto the world, to witness unto the world that which we have seen; and
+ we lie not, God bearing witness of it. CHRISTIAN WHITMER, JACOB WHITMER,
+ PETER WHITMER, JR., JOHN WHITMER, HIRAM PAGE, JOSEPH SMITH, SR., HYRUM
+ SMITH, SAMUEL H. SMITH.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ And when I am far on the road to conviction, and eight men, be they
+ grammatical or otherwise, come forward and tell me that they have seen the
+ plates too; and not only seen those plates but "hefted" them, I am
+ convinced. I could not feel more satisfied and at rest if the entire
+ Whitmer family had testified.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Mormon Bible consists of fifteen "books"&mdash;being the books of
+ Jacob, Enos, Jarom, Omni, Mosiah, Zeniff, Alma, Helaman, Ether, Moroni,
+ two "books" of Mormon, and three of Nephi.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In the first book of Nephi is a plagiarism of the Old Testament, which
+ gives an account of the exodus from Jerusalem of the "children of Lehi";
+ and it goes on to tell of their wanderings in the wilderness, during eight
+ years, and their supernatural protection by one of their number, a party
+ by the name of Nephi. They finally reached the land of "Bountiful," and
+ camped by the sea. After they had remained there "for the space of many
+ days"&mdash;which is more Scriptural than definite&mdash;Nephi was
+ commanded from on high to build a ship wherein to "carry the people across
+ the waters." He travestied Noah's ark&mdash;but he obeyed orders in the
+ matter of the plan. He finished the ship in a single day, while his
+ brethren stood by and made fun of it&mdash;and of him, too&mdash;"saying,
+ our brother is a fool, for he thinketh that he can build a ship." They did
+ not wait for the timbers to dry, but the whole tribe or nation sailed the
+ next day. Then a bit of genuine nature cropped out, and is revealed by
+ outspoken Nephi with Scriptural frankness&mdash;they all got on a spree!
+ They, "and also their wives, began to make themselves merry, insomuch that
+ they began to dance, and to sing, and to speak with much rudeness; yea,
+ they were lifted up unto exceeding rudeness."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Nephi tried to stop these scandalous proceedings; but they tied him neck
+ and heels, and went on with their lark. But observe how Nephi the prophet
+ circumvented them by the aid of the invisible powers:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ And it came to pass that after they had bound me, insomuch that I could
+ not move, the compass, which had been prepared of the Lord, did cease to
+ work; wherefore, they knew not whither they should steer the ship,
+ insomuch that there arose a great storm, yea, a great and terrible
+ tempest, and we were driven back upon the waters for the space of three
+ days; and they began to be frightened exceedingly, lest they should be
+ drowned in the sea; nevertheless they did not loose me. And on the
+ fourth day, which we had been driven back, the tempest began to be
+ exceeding sore. And it came to pass that we were about to be swallowed
+ up in the depths of the sea.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ Then they untied him.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link131" id="link131"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="131.jpg (77K)" src="images/131.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ And it came to pass after they had loosed me, behold, I took the
+ compass, and it did work whither I desired it. And it came to pass that
+ I prayed unto the Lord; and after I had prayed, the winds did cease, and
+ the storm did cease, and there was a great calm.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ Equipped with their compass, these ancients appear to have had the
+ advantage of Noah.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Their voyage was toward a "promised land"&mdash;the only name they give
+ it. They reached it in safety.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Polygamy is a recent feature in the Mormon religion, and was added by
+ Brigham Young after Joseph Smith's death. Before that, it was regarded as
+ an "abomination." This verse from the Mormon Bible occurs in Chapter II.
+ of the book of Jacob:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ For behold, thus saith the Lord, this people begin to wax in iniquity;
+ they understand not the Scriptures; for they seek to excuse themselves
+ in committing whoredoms, because of the things which were written
+ concerning David, and Solomon his son. Behold, David and Solomon truly
+ had many wives and concubines, which thing was abominable before me,
+ saith the Lord; wherefore, thus saith the Lord, I have led this people
+ forth out of the land of Jerusalem, by the power of mine arm, that I
+ might raise up unto me a righteous branch from the fruit of the loins of
+ Joseph. Wherefore, I the Lord God, will no suffer that this people shall
+ do like unto them of old.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ However, the project failed&mdash;or at least the modern Mormon end of it&mdash;for
+ Brigham "suffers" it. This verse is from the same chapter:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ Behold, the Lamanites your brethren, whom ye hate, because of their
+ filthiness and the cursings which hath come upon their skins, are more
+ righteous than you; for they have not forgotten the commandment of the
+ Lord, which was given unto our fathers, that they should have, save it
+ were one wife; and concubines they should have none.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ The following verse (from Chapter IX. of the Book of Nephi) appears to
+ contain information not familiar to everybody:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ And now it came to pass that when Jesus had ascended into heaven, the
+ multitude did disperse, and every man did take his wife and his
+ children, and did return to his own home.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And it came to pass that on the morrow, when the multitude was gathered
+ together, behold, Nephi and his brother whom he had raised from the
+ dead, whose name was Timothy, and also his son, whose name was Jonas,
+ and also Mathoni, and Mathonihah, his brother, and Kumen, and Kumenenhi,
+ and Jeremiah, and Shemnon, and Jonas, and Zedekiah, and Isaiah; now
+ these were the names of the disciples whom Jesus had chosen.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ In order that the reader may observe how much more grandeur and
+ picturesqueness (as seen by these Mormon twelve) accompanied on of the
+ tenderest episodes in the life of our Saviour than other eyes seem to have
+ been aware of, I quote the following from the same "book"&mdash;Nephi:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ And it came to pass that Jesus spake unto them, and bade them arise. And
+ they arose from the earth, and He said unto them, Blessed are ye because
+ of your faith. And now behold, My joy is full. And when He had said
+ these words, He wept, and the multitude bear record of it, and He took
+ their little children, one by one, and blessed them, and prayed unto the
+ Father for them. And when He had done this He wept again, and He spake
+ unto the multitude, and saith unto them, Behold your little ones. And as
+ they looked to behold, they cast their eyes toward heaven, and they saw
+ the heavens open, and they saw angels descending out of heaven as it
+ were, in the midst of fire; and they came down and encircled those
+ little ones about, and they were encircled about with fire; and the
+ angels did minister unto them, and the multitude did see and hear and
+ bear record; and they know that their record is true, for they all of
+ them did see and hear, every man for himself; and they were in number
+ about two thousand and five hundred souls; and they did consist of men,
+ women, and children.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ And what else would they be likely to consist of?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Book of Ether is an incomprehensible medley of if "history," much of
+ it relating to battles and sieges among peoples whom the reader has
+ possibly never heard of; and who inhabited a country which is not set down
+ in the geography. These was a King with the remarkable name of
+ Coriantumr,^^ and he warred with Shared, and Lib, and Shiz, and others, in
+ the "plains of Heshlon"; and the "valley of Gilgal"; and the "wilderness
+ of Akish"; and the "land of Moran"; and the "plains of Agosh"; and
+ "Ogath," and "Ramah," and the "land of Corihor," and the "hill Comnor," by
+ "the waters of Ripliancum," etc., etc., etc. "And it came to pass," after
+ a deal of fighting, that Coriantumr, upon making calculation of his
+ losses, found that "there had been slain two millions of mighty men, and
+ also their wives and their children"&mdash;say 5,000,000 or 6,000,000 in
+ all&mdash;"and he began to sorrow in his heart." Unquestionably it was
+ time. So he wrote to Shiz, asking a cessation of hostilities, and offering
+ to give up his kingdom to save his people. Shiz declined, except upon
+ condition that Coriantumr would come and let him cut his head off first&mdash;a
+ thing which Coriantumr would not do. Then there was more fighting for a
+ season; then four years were devoted to gathering the forces for a final
+ struggle&mdash;after which ensued a battle, which, I take it, is the most
+ remarkable set forth in history,&mdash;except, perhaps, that of the
+ Kilkenny cats, which it resembles in some respects. This is the account of
+ the gathering and the battle:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ 7. And it came to pass that they did gather together all the people,
+ upon all the face of the land, who had not been slain, save it was
+ Ether. And it came to pass that Ether did behold all the doings of the
+ people; and he beheld that the people who were for Coriantumr, were
+ gathered together to the army of Coriantumr; and the people who were for
+ Shiz, were gathered together to the army of Shiz; wherefore they were
+ for the space of four years gathering together the people, that they
+ might get all who were upon the face of the land, and that they might
+ receive all the strength which it was possible that they could receive.
+ And it came to pass that when they were all gathered together, every one
+ to the army which he would, with their wives and their children; both
+ men, women, and children being armed with weapons of war, having
+ shields, and breast-plates, and head-plates, and being clothed after the
+ manner of war, they did march forth one against another, to battle; and
+ they fought all that day, and conquered not. And it came to pass that
+ when it was night they were weary, and retired to their camps; and after
+ they had retired to their camps, they took up a howling and a
+ lamentation for the loss of the slain of their people; and so great were
+ their cries, their howlings and lamentations, that it did rend the air
+ exceedingly. And it came to pass that on the morrow they did go again to
+ battle, and great and terrible was that day; nevertheless they conquered
+ not, and when the night came again, they did rend the air with their
+ cries, and their howlings, and their mournings, for the loss of the
+ slain of their people.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ 8. And it came to pass that Coriantumr wrote again an epistle unto Shiz,
+ desiring that he would not come again to battle, but that he would take
+ the kingdom, and spare the lives of the people. But behold, the Spirit
+ of the Lord had ceased striving with them, and Satan had full power over
+ the hearts of the people, for they were given up unto the hardness of
+ their hearts, and the blindness of their minds that they might be
+ destroyed; wherefore they went again to battle. And it came to pass that
+ they fought all that day, and when the night came they slept upon their
+ swords; and on the morrow they fought even until the night came; and
+ when the night came they were drunken with anger, even as a man who is
+ drunken with wine; and they slept again upon their swords; and on the
+ morrow they fought again; and when the night came they had all fallen by
+ the sword save it were fifty and two of the people of Coriantumr, and
+ sixty and nine of the people of Shiz. And it came to pass that they
+ slept upon their swords that night, and on the morrow they fought again,
+ and they contended in their mights with their swords, and with their
+ shields, all that day; and when the night came there were thirty and two
+ of the people of Shiz, and twenty and seven of the people of Coriantumr.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ 9. And it came to pass that they ate and slept, and prepared for death
+ on the morrow. And they were large and mighty men, as to the strength of
+ men. And it came to pass that they fought for the space of three hours,
+ and they fainted with the loss of blood. And it came to pass that when
+ the men of Coriantumr had received sufficient strength, that they could
+ walk, they were about to flee for their lives, but behold, Shiz arose,
+ and also his men, and he swore in his wrath that he would slay
+ Coriantumr, or he would perish by the sword: wherefore he did pursue
+ them, and on the morrow he did overtake them; and they fought again with
+ the sword. And it came to pass that when they had all fallen by the
+ sword, save it were Coriantumr and Shiz, behold Shiz had fainted with
+ loss of blood. And it came to pass that when Coriantumr had leaned upon
+ his sword, that he rested a little, he smote off the head of Shiz. And
+ it came to pass that after he had smote off the head of Shiz, that Shiz
+ raised upon his hands and fell; and after that he had struggled for
+ breath, he died. And it came to pass that Coriantumr fell to the earth,
+ and became as if he had no life. And the Lord spake unto Ether, and said
+ unto him, go forth. And he went forth, and beheld that the words of the
+ Lord had all been fulfilled; and he finished his record; and the
+ hundredth part I have not written.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ It seems a pity he did not finish, for after all his dreary former
+ chapters of commonplace, he stopped just as he was in danger of becoming
+ interesting.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Mormon Bible is rather stupid and tiresome to read, but there is
+ nothing vicious in its teachings. Its code of morals is unobjectionable-
+ -it is "smouched" [Milton] from the New Testament and no credit given.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch17" id="linkch17"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XVII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At the end of our two days' sojourn, we left Great Salt Lake City hearty
+ and well fed and happy&mdash;physically superb but not so very much wiser,
+ as regards the "Mormon question," than we were when we arrived, perhaps.
+ We had a deal more "information" than we had before, of course, but we did
+ not know what portion of it was reliable and what was not&mdash;for it all
+ came from acquaintances of a day&mdash;strangers, strictly speaking. We
+ were told, for instance, that the dreadful "Mountain Meadows Massacre" was
+ the work of the Indians entirely, and that the Gentiles had meanly tried
+ to fasten it upon the Mormons; we were told, likewise, that the Indians
+ were to blame, partly, and partly the Mormons; and we were told, likewise,
+ and just as positively, that the Mormons were almost if not wholly and
+ completely responsible for that most treacherous and pitiless butchery. We
+ got the story in all these different shapes, but it was not till several
+ years afterward that Mrs. Waite's book, "The Mormon Prophet," came out
+ with Judge Cradlebaugh's trial of the accused parties in it and revealed
+ the truth that the latter version was the correct one and that the Mormons
+ were the assassins. All our "information" had three sides to it, and so I
+ gave up the idea that I could settle the "Mormon question" in two days.
+ Still I have seen newspaper correspondents do it in one.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link137" id="link137"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="137.jpg (62K)" src="images/137.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I left Great Salt Lake a good deal confused as to what state of things
+ existed there&mdash;and sometimes even questioning in my own mind whether
+ a state of things existed there at all or not. But presently I remembered
+ with a lightening sense of relief that we had learned two or three trivial
+ things there which we could be certain of; and so the two days were not
+ wholly lost. For instance, we had learned that we were at last in a
+ pioneer land, in absolute and tangible reality.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The high prices charged for trifles were eloquent of high freights and
+ bewildering distances of freightage. In the east, in those days, the
+ smallest moneyed denomination was a penny and it represented the smallest
+ purchasable quantity of any commodity. West of Cincinnati the smallest
+ coin in use was the silver five-cent piece and no smaller quantity of an
+ article could be bought than "five cents' worth." In Overland City the
+ lowest coin appeared to be the ten-cent piece; but in Salt Lake there did
+ not seem to be any money in circulation smaller than a quarter, or any
+ smaller quantity purchasable of any commodity than twenty-five cents'
+ worth. We had always been used to half dimes and "five cents' worth" as
+ the minimum of financial negotiations; but in Salt Lake if one wanted a
+ cigar, it was a quarter; if he wanted a chalk pipe, it was a quarter; if
+ he wanted a peach, or a candle, or a newspaper, or a shave, or a little
+ Gentile whiskey to rub on his corns to arrest indigestion and keep him
+ from having the toothache, twenty-five cents was the price, every time.
+ When we looked at the shot-bag of silver, now and then, we seemed to be
+ wasting our substance in riotous living, but if we referred to the expense
+ account we could see that we had not been doing anything of the kind.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link138" id="link138"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="138.jpg (21K)" src="images/138.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But people easily get reconciled to big money and big prices, and fond and
+ vain of both&mdash;it is a descent to little coins and cheap prices that
+ is hardest to bear and slowest to take hold upon one's toleration. After a
+ month's acquaintance with the twenty-five cent minimum, the average human
+ being is ready to blush every time he thinks of his despicable five-cent
+ days. How sunburnt with blushes I used to get in gaudy Nevada, every time
+ I thought of my first financial experience in Salt Lake. It was on this
+ wise (which is a favorite expression of great authors, and a very neat
+ one, too, but I never hear anybody say on this wise when they are
+ talking). A young half-breed with a complexion like a yellow-jacket asked
+ me if I would have my boots blacked. It was at the Salt Lake House the
+ morning after we arrived. I said yes, and he blacked them. Then I handed
+ him a silver five-cent piece, with the benevolent air of a person who is
+ conferring wealth and blessedness upon poverty and suffering. The
+ yellow-jacket took it with what I judged to be suppressed emotion, and
+ laid it reverently down in the middle of his broad hand. Then he began to
+ contemplate it, much as a philosopher contemplates a gnat's ear in the
+ ample field of his microscope. Several mountaineers, teamsters, stage-
+ drivers, etc., drew near and dropped into the tableau and fell to
+ surveying the money with that attractive indifference to formality which
+ is noticeable in the hardy pioneer. Presently the yellow-jacket handed the
+ half dime back to me and told me I ought to keep my money in my
+ pocket-book instead of in my soul, and then I wouldn't get it cramped and
+ shriveled up so!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link139" id="link139"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="139.jpg (61K)" src="images/139.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ What a roar of vulgar laughter there was! I destroyed the mongrel reptile
+ on the spot, but I smiled and smiled all the time I was detaching his
+ scalp, for the remark he made was good for an "Injun."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Yes, we had learned in Salt Lake to be charged great prices without
+ letting the inward shudder appear on the surface&mdash;for even already we
+ had overheard and noted the tenor of conversations among drivers,
+ conductors, and hostlers, and finally among citizens of Salt Lake, until
+ we were well aware that these superior beings despised "emigrants." We
+ permitted no tell-tale shudders and winces in our countenances, for we
+ wanted to seem pioneers, or Mormons, half-breeds, teamsters,
+ stage-drivers, Mountain Meadow assassins&mdash;anything in the world that
+ the plains and Utah respected and admired&mdash;but we were wretchedly
+ ashamed of being "emigrants," and sorry enough that we had white shirts
+ and could not swear in the presence of ladies without looking the other
+ way.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And many a time in Nevada, afterwards, we had occasion to remember with
+ humiliation that we were "emigrants," and consequently a low and inferior
+ sort of creatures. Perhaps the reader has visited Utah, Nevada, or
+ California, even in these latter days, and while communing with himself
+ upon the sorrowful banishment of these countries from what he considers
+ "the world," has had his wings clipped by finding that he is the one to be
+ pitied, and that there are entire populations around him ready and willing
+ to do it for him&mdash;yea, who are complacently doing it for him already,
+ wherever he steps his foot.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Poor thing, they are making fun of his hat; and the cut of his New York
+ coat; and his conscientiousness about his grammar; and his feeble
+ profanity; and his consumingly ludicrous ignorance of ores, shafts,
+ tunnels, and other things which he never saw before, and never felt enough
+ interest in to read about. And all the time that he is thinking what a sad
+ fate it is to be exiled to that far country, that lonely land, the
+ citizens around him are looking down on him with a blighting compassion
+ because he is an "emigrant" instead of that proudest and blessedest
+ creature that exists on all the earth, a "FORTY-NINER."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link140" id="link140"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="140.jpg (30K)" src="images/140.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The accustomed coach life began again, now, and by midnight it almost
+ seemed as if we never had been out of our snuggery among the mail sacks at
+ all. We had made one alteration, however. We had provided enough bread,
+ boiled ham and hard boiled eggs to last double the six hundred miles of
+ staging we had still to do.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And it was comfort in those succeeding days to sit up and contemplate the
+ majestic panorama of mountains and valleys spread out below us and eat ham
+ and hard boiled eggs while our spiritual natures revelled alternately in
+ rainbows, thunderstorms, and peerless sunsets. Nothing helps scenery like
+ ham and eggs. Ham and eggs, and after these a pipe&mdash;an old, rank,
+ delicious pipe&mdash;ham and eggs and scenery, a "down grade," a flying
+ coach, a fragrant pipe and a contented heart&mdash;these make happiness.
+ It is what all the ages have struggled for.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link141" id="link141"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="141.jpg (29K)" src="images/141.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch18" id="linkch18"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XVIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At eight in the morning we reached the remnant and ruin of what had been
+ the important military station of "Camp Floyd," some forty-five or fifty
+ miles from Salt Lake City. At four P.M. we had doubled our distance and
+ were ninety or a hundred miles from Salt Lake. And now we entered upon one
+ of that species of deserts whose concentrated hideousness shames the
+ diffused and diluted horrors of Sahara&mdash;an "alkali" desert. For
+ sixty- eight miles there was but one break in it. I do not remember that
+ this was really a break; indeed it seems to me that it was nothing but a
+ watering depot in the midst of the stretch of sixty-eight miles. If my
+ memory serves me, there was no well or spring at this place, but the water
+ was hauled there by mule and ox teams from the further side of the desert.
+ There was a stage station there. It was forty-five miles from the
+ beginning of the desert, and twenty-three from the end of it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We plowed and dragged and groped along, the whole live-long night, and at
+ the end of this uncomfortable twelve hours we finished the forty-five-
+ mile part of the desert and got to the stage station where the imported
+ water was. The sun was just rising. It was easy enough to cross a desert
+ in the night while we were asleep; and it was pleasant to reflect, in the
+ morning, that we in actual person had encountered an absolute desert and
+ could always speak knowingly of deserts in presence of the ignorant
+ thenceforward. And it was pleasant also to reflect that this was not an
+ obscure, back country desert, but a very celebrated one, the metropolis
+ itself, as you may say. All this was very well and very comfortable and
+ satisfactory&mdash;but now we were to cross a desert in daylight. This was
+ fine&mdash;novel&mdash;romantic&mdash;dramatically adventurous&mdash;this,
+ indeed, was worth living for, worth traveling for! We would write home all
+ about it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This enthusiasm, this stern thirst for adventure, wilted under the sultry
+ August sun and did not last above one hour. One poor little hour&mdash;and
+ then we were ashamed that we had "gushed" so. The poetry was all in the
+ anticipation&mdash;there is none in the reality. Imagine a vast, waveless
+ ocean stricken dead and turned to ashes; imagine this solemn waste tufted
+ with ash-dusted sage-bushes; imagine the lifeless silence and solitude
+ that belong to such a place; imagine a coach, creeping like a bug through
+ the midst of this shoreless level, and sending up tumbled volumes of dust
+ as if it were a bug that went by steam; imagine this aching monotony of
+ toiling and plowing kept up hour after hour, and the shore still as far
+ away as ever, apparently; imagine team, driver, coach and passengers so
+ deeply coated with ashes that they are all one colorless color; imagine
+ ash-drifts roosting above moustaches and eyebrows like snow accumulations
+ on boughs and bushes. This is the reality of it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The sun beats down with dead, blistering, relentless malignity; the
+ perspiration is welling from every pore in man and beast, but scarcely a
+ sign of it finds its way to the surface&mdash;it is absorbed before it
+ gets there; there is not the faintest breath of air stirring; there is not
+ a merciful shred of cloud in all the brilliant firmament; there is not a
+ living creature visible in any direction whither one searches the blank
+ level that stretches its monotonous miles on every hand; there is not a
+ sound&mdash;not a sigh&mdash;not a whisper&mdash;not a buzz, or a whir of
+ wings, or distant pipe of bird&mdash;not even a sob from the lost souls
+ that doubtless people that dead air. And so the occasional sneezing of the
+ resting mules, and the champing of the bits, grate harshly on the grim
+ stillness, not dissipating the spell but accenting it and making one feel
+ more lonesome and forsaken than before.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The mules, under violent swearing, coaxing and whip-cracking, would make
+ at stated intervals a "spurt," and drag the coach a hundred or may be two
+ hundred yards, stirring up a billowy cloud of dust that rolled back,
+ enveloping the vehicle to the wheel-tops or higher, and making it seem
+ afloat in a fog. Then a rest followed, with the usual sneezing and bit-
+ champing. Then another "spurt" of a hundred yards and another rest at the
+ end of it. All day long we kept this up, without water for the mules and
+ without ever changing the team. At least we kept it up ten hours, which, I
+ take it, is a day, and a pretty honest one, in an alkali desert. It was
+ from four in the morning till two in the afternoon. And it was so hot! and
+ so close! and our water canteens went dry in the middle of the day and we
+ got so thirsty! It was so stupid and tiresome and dull! and the tedious
+ hours did lag and drag and limp along with such a cruel deliberation! It
+ was so trying to give one's watch a good long undisturbed spell and then
+ take it out and find that it had been fooling away the time and not trying
+ to get ahead any! The alkali dust cut through our lips, it persecuted our
+ eyes, it ate through the delicate membranes and made our noses bleed and
+ kept them bleeding&mdash;and truly and seriously the romance all faded far
+ away and disappeared, and left the desert trip nothing but a harsh reality&mdash;a
+ thirsty, sweltering, longing, hateful reality!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Two miles and a quarter an hour for ten hours&mdash;that was what we
+ accomplished. It was hard to bring the comprehension away down to such a
+ snail-pace as that, when we had been used to making eight and ten miles an
+ hour. When we reached the station on the farther verge of the desert, we
+ were glad, for the first time, that the dictionary was along, because we
+ never could have found language to tell how glad we were, in any sort of
+ dictionary but an unabridged one with pictures in it. But there could not
+ have been found in a whole library of dictionaries language sufficient to
+ tell how tired those mules were after their twenty-three mile pull. To try
+ to give the reader an idea of how thirsty they were, would be to "gild
+ refined gold or paint the lily."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Somehow, now that it is there, the quotation does not seem to fit&mdash;but
+ no matter, let it stay, anyhow. I think it is a graceful and attractive
+ thing, and therefore have tried time and time again to work it in where it
+ would fit, but could not succeed. These efforts have kept my mind
+ distracted and ill at ease, and made my narrative seem broken and
+ disjointed, in places. Under these circumstances it seems to me best to
+ leave it in, as above, since this will afford at least a temporary respite
+ from the wear and tear of trying to "lead up" to this really apt and
+ beautiful quotation.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link145" id="link145"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="145.jpg (32K)" src="images/145.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch19" id="linkch19"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XIX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On the morning of the sixteenth day out from St. Joseph we arrived at the
+ entrance of Rocky Canyon, two hundred and fifty miles from Salt Lake. It
+ was along in this wild country somewhere, and far from any habitation of
+ white men, except the stage stations, that we came across the wretchedest
+ type of mankind I have ever seen, up to this writing. I refer to the
+ Goshoot Indians. From what we could see and all we could learn, they are
+ very considerably inferior to even the despised Digger Indians of
+ California; inferior to all races of savages on our continent; inferior to
+ even the Terra del Fuegans; inferior to the Hottentots, and actually
+ inferior in some respects to the Kytches of Africa. Indeed, I have been
+ obliged to look the bulky volumes of Wood's "Uncivilized Races of Men"
+ clear through in order to find a savage tribe degraded enough to take rank
+ with the Goshoots. I find but one people fairly open to that shameful
+ verdict. It is the Bosjesmans (Bushmen) of South Africa. Such of the
+ Goshoots as we saw, along the road and hanging about the stations, were
+ small, lean, "scrawny" creatures; in complexion a dull black like the
+ ordinary American negro; their faces and hands bearing dirt which they had
+ been hoarding and accumulating for months, years, and even generations,
+ according to the age of the proprietor; a silent, sneaking, treacherous
+ looking race; taking note of everything, covertly, like all the other
+ "Noble Red Men" that we (do not) read about, and betraying no sign in
+ their countenances; indolent, everlastingly patient and tireless, like all
+ other Indians; prideless beggars&mdash;for if the beggar instinct were
+ left out of an Indian he would not "go," any more than a clock without a
+ pendulum; hungry, always hungry, and yet never refusing anything that a
+ hog would eat, though often eating what a hog would decline; hunters, but
+ having no higher ambition than to kill and eat jack-ass rabbits, crickets
+ and grasshoppers, and embezzle carrion from the buzzards and cayotes;
+ savages who, when asked if they have the common Indian belief in a Great
+ Spirit show a something which almost amounts to emotion, thinking whiskey
+ is referred to; a thin, scattering race of almost naked black children,
+ these Goshoots are, who produce nothing at all, and have no villages, and
+ no gatherings together into strictly defined tribal communities&mdash;a
+ people whose only shelter is a rag cast on a bush to keep off a portion of
+ the snow, and yet who inhabit one of the most rocky, wintry, repulsive
+ wastes that our country or any other can exhibit.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link147" id="link147"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="147.jpg (86K)" src="images/147.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Bushmen and our Goshoots are manifestly descended from the self-same
+ gorilla, or kangaroo, or Norway rat, which-ever animal&mdash;Adam the
+ Darwinians trace them to.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One would as soon expect the rabbits to fight as the Goshoots, and yet
+ they used to live off the offal and refuse of the stations a few months
+ and then come some dark night when no mischief was expected, and burn down
+ the buildings and kill the men from ambush as they rushed out. And once,
+ in the night, they attacked the stage-coach when a District Judge, of
+ Nevada Territory, was the only passenger, and with their first volley of
+ arrows (and a bullet or two) they riddled the stage curtains, wounded a
+ horse or two and mortally wounded the driver. The latter was full of
+ pluck, and so was his passenger. At the driver's call Judge Mott swung
+ himself out, clambered to the box and seized the reins of the team, and
+ away they plunged, through the racing mob of skeletons and under a
+ hurtling storm of missiles. The stricken driver had sunk down on the boot
+ as soon as he was wounded, but had held on to the reins and said he would
+ manage to keep hold of them until relieved.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And after they were taken from his relaxing grasp, he lay with his head
+ between Judge Mott's feet, and tranquilly gave directions about the road;
+ he said he believed he could live till the miscreants were outrun and left
+ behind, and that if he managed that, the main difficulty would be at an
+ end, and then if the Judge drove so and so (giving directions about bad
+ places in the road, and general course) he would reach the next station
+ without trouble. The Judge distanced the enemy and at last rattled up to
+ the station and knew that the night's perils were done; but there was no
+ comrade-in-arms for him to rejoice with, for the soldierly driver was
+ dead.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link148" id="link148"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="148.jpg (43K)" src="images/148.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Let us forget that we have been saying harsh things about the Overland
+ drivers, now. The disgust which the Goshoots gave me, a disciple of Cooper
+ and a worshipper of the Red Man&mdash;even of the scholarly savages in the
+ "Last of the Mohicans" who are fittingly associated with backwoodsmen who
+ divide each sentence into two equal parts: one part critically
+ grammatical, refined and choice of language, and the other part just such
+ an attempt to talk like a hunter or a mountaineer, as a Broadway clerk
+ might make after eating an edition of Emerson Bennett's works and studying
+ frontier life at the Bowery Theatre a couple of weeks&mdash;I say that the
+ nausea which the Goshoots gave me, an Indian worshipper, set me to
+ examining authorities, to see if perchance I had been over-estimating the
+ Red Man while viewing him through the mellow moonshine of romance. The
+ revelations that came were disenchanting. It was curious to see how
+ quickly the paint and tinsel fell away from him and left him treacherous,
+ filthy and repulsive&mdash;and how quickly the evidences accumulated that
+ wherever one finds an Indian tribe he has only found Goshoots more or less
+ modified by circumstances and surroundings&mdash;but Goshoots, after all.
+ They deserve pity, poor creatures; and they can have mine&mdash;at this
+ distance. Nearer by, they never get anybody's.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There is an impression abroad that the Baltimore and Washington Railroad
+ Company and many of its employees are Goshoots; but it is an error. There
+ is only a plausible resemblance, which, while it is apt enough to mislead
+ the ignorant, cannot deceive parties who have contemplated both tribes.
+ But seriously, it was not only poor wit, but very wrong to start the
+ report referred to above; for however innocent the motive may have been,
+ the necessary effect was to injure the reputation of a class who have a
+ hard enough time of it in the pitiless deserts of the Rocky Mountains,
+ Heaven knows! If we cannot find it in our hearts to give those poor naked
+ creatures our Christian sympathy and compassion, in God's name let us at
+ least not throw mud at them.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch20" id="linkch20"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On the seventeenth day we passed the highest mountain peaks we had yet
+ seen, and although the day was very warm the night that followed upon its
+ heels was wintry cold and blankets were next to useless.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On the eighteenth day we encountered the eastward-bound telegraph-
+ constructors at Reese River station and sent a message to his Excellency
+ Gov. Nye at Carson City (distant one hundred and fifty-six miles).
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On the nineteenth day we crossed the Great American Desert&mdash;forty
+ memorable miles of bottomless sand, into which the coach wheels sunk from
+ six inches to a foot. We worked our passage most of the way across. That
+ is to say, we got out and walked. It was a dreary pull and a long and
+ thirsty one, for we had no water. From one extremity of this desert to the
+ other, the road was white with the bones of oxen and horses. It would
+ hardly be an exaggeration to say that we could have walked the forty miles
+ and set our feet on a bone at every step! The desert was one prodigious
+ graveyard. And the log-chains, wagon tyres, and rotting wrecks of vehicles
+ were almost as thick as the bones. I think we saw log-chains enough
+ rusting there in the desert, to reach across any State in the Union. Do
+ not these relics suggest something of an idea of the fearful suffering and
+ privation the early emigrants to California endured?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At the border of the Desert lies Carson Lake, or The "Sink" of the Carson,
+ a shallow, melancholy sheet of water some eighty or a hundred miles in
+ circumference. Carson River empties into it and is lost&mdash;sinks
+ mysteriously into the earth and never appears in the light of the sun
+ again&mdash;for the lake has no outlet whatever.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There are several rivers in Nevada, and they all have this mysterious
+ fate. They end in various lakes or "sinks," and that is the last of them.
+ Carson Lake, Humboldt Lake, Walker Lake, Mono Lake, are all great sheets
+ of water without any visible outlet. Water is always flowing into them;
+ none is ever seen to flow out of them, and yet they remain always level
+ full, neither receding nor overflowing. What they do with their surplus is
+ only known to the Creator.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On the western verge of the Desert we halted a moment at Ragtown. It
+ consisted of one log house and is not set down on the map.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This reminds me of a circumstance. Just after we left Julesburg, on the
+ Platte, I was sitting with the driver, and he said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I can tell you a most laughable thing indeed, if you would like to listen
+ to it. Horace Greeley went over this road once. When he was leaving Carson
+ City he told the driver, Hank Monk, that he had an engagement to lecture
+ at Placerville and was very anxious to go through quick. Hank Monk cracked
+ his whip and started off at an awful pace. The coach bounced up and down
+ in such a terrific way that it jolted the buttons all off of Horace's
+ coat, and finally shot his head clean through the roof of the stage, and
+ then he yelled at Hank Monk and begged him to go easier&mdash;said he
+ warn't in as much of a hurry as he was awhile ago. But Hank Monk said,
+ 'Keep your seat, Horace, and I'll get you there on time'&mdash;and you bet
+ you he did, too, what was left of him!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link151" id="link151"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="151.jpg (54K)" src="images/151.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A day or two after that we picked up a Denver man at the cross roads, and
+ he told us a good deal about the country and the Gregory Diggings. He
+ seemed a very entertaining person and a man well posted in the affairs of
+ Colorado. By and by he remarked:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I can tell you a most laughable thing indeed, if you would like to listen
+ to it. Horace Greeley went over this road once. When he was leaving Carson
+ City he told the driver, Hank Monk, that he had an engagement to lecture
+ at Placerville and was very anxious to go through quick. Hank Monk cracked
+ his whip and started off at an awful pace. The coach bounced up and down
+ in such a terrific way that it jolted the buttons all off of Horace's
+ coat, and finally shot his head clean through the roof of the stage, and
+ then he yelled at Hank Monk and begged him to go easier&mdash;said he
+ warn't in as much of a hurry as he was awhile ago. But Hank Monk said,
+ 'Keep your seat, Horace, and I'll get you there on time!'&mdash;and you
+ bet you he did, too, what was left of him!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At Fort Bridger, some days after this, we took on board a cavalry
+ sergeant, a very proper and soldierly person indeed. From no other man
+ during the whole journey, did we gather such a store of concise and well-
+ arranged military information. It was surprising to find in the desolate
+ wilds of our country a man so thoroughly acquainted with everything useful
+ to know in his line of life, and yet of such inferior rank and
+ unpretentious bearing. For as much as three hours we listened to him with
+ unabated interest. Finally he got upon the subject of trans- continental
+ travel, and presently said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I can tell you a very laughable thing indeed, if you would like to listen
+ to it. Horace Greeley went over this road once. When he was leaving Carson
+ City he told the driver, Hank Monk, that he had an engagement to lecture
+ at Placerville and was very anxious to go through quick. Hank Monk cracked
+ his whip and started off at an awful pace. The coach bounced up and down
+ in such a terrific way that it jolted the buttons all off of Horace's
+ coat, and finally shot his head clean through the roof of the stage, and
+ then he yelled at Hank Monk and begged him to go easier&mdash;said he
+ warn't in as much of a hurry as he was awhile ago. But Hank Monk said,
+ 'Keep your seat, Horace, and I'll get you there on time!'&mdash;and you
+ bet you he did, too, what was left of him!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When we were eight hours out from Salt Lake City a Mormon preacher got in
+ with us at a way station&mdash;a gentle, soft-spoken, kindly man, and one
+ whom any stranger would warm to at first sight. I can never forget the
+ pathos that was in his voice as he told, in simple language, the story of
+ his people's wanderings and unpitied sufferings. No pulpit eloquence was
+ ever so moving and so beautiful as this outcast's picture of the first
+ Mormon pilgrimage across the plains, struggling sorrowfully onward to the
+ land of its banishment and marking its desolate way with graves and
+ watering it with tears. His words so wrought upon us that it was a relief
+ to us all when the conversation drifted into a more cheerful channel and
+ the natural features of the curious country we were in came under
+ treatment. One matter after another was pleasantly discussed, and at
+ length the stranger said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I can tell you a most laughable thing indeed, if you would like to listen
+ to it. Horace Greeley went over this road once. When he was leaving Carson
+ City he told the driver, Hank Monk, that he had an engagement to lecture
+ in Placerville, and was very anxious to go through quick. Hank Monk
+ cracked his whip and started off at an awful pace. The coach bounced up
+ and down in such a terrific way that it jolted the buttons all off of
+ Horace's coat, and finally shot his head clean through the roof of the
+ stage, and then he yelled at Hank Monk and begged him to go easier&mdash;said
+ he warn't in as much of a hurry as he was awhile ago. But Hank Monk said,
+ 'Keep your seat, Horace, and I'll get you there on time!'&mdash;and you
+ bet you bet you he did, too, what was left of him!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Ten miles out of Ragtown we found a poor wanderer who had lain down to
+ die. He had walked as long as he could, but his limbs had failed him at
+ last. Hunger and fatigue had conquered him. It would have been inhuman to
+ leave him there. We paid his fare to Carson and lifted him into the coach.
+ It was some little time before he showed any very decided signs of life;
+ but by dint of chafing him and pouring brandy between his lips we finally
+ brought him to a languid consciousness. Then we fed him a little, and by
+ and by he seemed to comprehend the situation and a grateful light softened
+ his eye. We made his mail-sack bed as comfortable as possible, and
+ constructed a pillow for him with our coats. He seemed very thankful. Then
+ he looked up in our faces, and said in a feeble voice that had a tremble
+ of honest emotion in it:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gentlemen, I know not who you are, but you have saved my life; and
+ although I can never be able to repay you for it, I feel that I can at
+ least make one hour of your long journey lighter. I take it you are
+ strangers to this great thorough fare, but I am entirely familiar with it.
+ In this connection I can tell you a most laughable thing indeed, if you
+ would like to listen to it. Horace Greeley&mdash;&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link154" id="link154"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="154.jpg (51K)" src="images/154.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I said, impressively:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Suffering stranger, proceed at your peril. You see in me the melancholy
+ wreck of a once stalwart and magnificent manhood. What has brought me to
+ this? That thing which you are about to tell. Gradually but surely, that
+ tiresome old anecdote has sapped my strength, undermined my constitution,
+ withered my life. Pity my helplessness. Spare me only just this once, and
+ tell me about young George Washington and his little hatchet for a
+ change."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We were saved. But not so the invalid. In trying to retain the anecdote in
+ his system he strained himself and died in our arms.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I am aware, now, that I ought not to have asked of the sturdiest citizen
+ of all that region, what I asked of that mere shadow of a man; for, after
+ seven years' residence on the Pacific coast, I know that no passenger or
+ driver on the Overland ever corked that anecdote in, when a stranger was
+ by, and survived. Within a period of six years I crossed and recrossed the
+ Sierras between Nevada and California thirteen times by stage and listened
+ to that deathless incident four hundred and eighty-one or eighty-two
+ times. I have the list somewhere. Drivers always told it, conductors told
+ it, landlords told it, chance passengers told it, the very Chinamen and
+ vagrant Indians recounted it. I have had the same driver tell it to me two
+ or three times in the same afternoon. It has come to me in all the
+ multitude of tongues that Babel bequeathed to earth, and flavored with
+ whiskey, brandy, beer, cologne, sozodont, tobacco, garlic, onions,
+ grasshoppers&mdash;everything that has a fragrance to it through all the
+ long list of things that are gorged or guzzled by the sons of men. I never
+ have smelt any anecdote as often as I have smelt that one; never have
+ smelt any anecdote that smelt so variegated as that one. And you never
+ could learn to know it by its smell, because every time you thought you
+ had learned the smell of it, it would turn up with a different smell.
+ Bayard Taylor has written about this hoary anecdote, Richardson has
+ published it; so have Jones, Smith, Johnson, Ross Browne, and every other
+ correspondence-inditing being that ever set his foot upon the great
+ overland road anywhere between Julesburg and San Francisco; and I have
+ heard that it is in the Talmud. I have seen it in print in nine different
+ foreign languages; I have been told that it is employed in the inquisition
+ in Rome; and I now learn with regret that it is going to be set to music.
+ I do not think that such things are right.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Stage-coaching on the Overland is no more, and stage drivers are a race
+ defunct. I wonder if they bequeathed that bald-headed anecdote to their
+ successors, the railroad brakemen and conductors, and if these latter
+ still persecute the helpless passenger with it until he concludes, as did
+ many a tourist of other days, that the real grandeurs of the Pacific coast
+ are not Yo Semite and the Big Trees, but Hank Monk and his adventure with
+ Horace Greeley.
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ [And what makes that worn anecdote the more aggravating, is, that the
+ adventure it celebrates never occurred. If it were a good anecdote, that
+ seeming demerit would be its chiefest virtue, for creative power belongs
+ to greatness; but what ought to be done to a man who would wantonly
+ contrive so flat a one as this? If I were to suggest what ought to be
+ done to him, I should be called extravagant&mdash;but what does the
+ sixteenth chapter of Daniel say? Aha!]
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link156" id="link156"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="156.jpg (17K)" src="images/156.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch21" id="linkch21"></a>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We were approaching the end of our long journey. It was the morning of the
+ twentieth day. At noon we would reach Carson City, the capital of Nevada
+ Territory. We were not glad, but sorry. It had been a fine pleasure trip;
+ we had fed fat on wonders every day; we were now well accustomed to stage
+ life, and very fond of it; so the idea of coming to a stand-still and
+ settling down to a humdrum existence in a village was not agreeable, but
+ on the contrary depressing.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Visibly our new home was a desert, walled in by barren, snow-clad
+ mountains. There was not a tree in sight. There was no vegetation but the
+ endless sage-brush and greasewood. All nature was gray with it. We were
+ plowing through great deeps of powdery alkali dust that rose in thick
+ clouds and floated across the plain like smoke from a burning house.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We were coated with it like millers; so were the coach, the mules, the
+ mail-bags, the driver&mdash;we and the sage-brush and the other scenery
+ were all one monotonous color. Long trains of freight wagons in the
+ distance envelope in ascending masses of dust suggested pictures of
+ prairies on fire. These teams and their masters were the only life we saw.
+ Otherwise we moved in the midst of solitude, silence and desolation. Every
+ twenty steps we passed the skeleton of some dead beast of burthen, with
+ its dust-coated skin stretched tightly over its empty ribs. Frequently a
+ solemn raven sat upon the skull or the hips and contemplated the passing
+ coach with meditative serenity.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link158" id="link158"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="158.jpg (17K)" src="images/158.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By and by Carson City was pointed out to us. It nestled in the edge of a
+ great plain and was a sufficient number of miles away to look like an
+ assemblage of mere white spots in the shadow of a grim range of mountains
+ overlooking it, whose summits seemed lifted clear out of companionship and
+ consciousness of earthly things.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We arrived, disembarked, and the stage went on. It was a "wooden" town;
+ its population two thousand souls. The main street consisted of four or
+ five blocks of little white frame stores which were too high to sit down
+ on, but not too high for various other purposes; in fact, hardly high
+ enough. They were packed close together, side by side, as if room were
+ scarce in that mighty plain.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The sidewalk was of boards that were more or less loose and inclined to
+ rattle when walked upon. In the middle of the town, opposite the stores,
+ was the "plaza" which is native to all towns beyond the Rocky Mountains&mdash;a
+ large, unfenced, level vacancy, with a liberty pole in it, and very useful
+ as a place for public auctions, horse trades, and mass meetings, and
+ likewise for teamsters to camp in. Two other sides of the plaza were faced
+ by stores, offices and stables.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The rest of Carson City was pretty scattering.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We were introduced to several citizens, at the stage-office and on the way
+ up to the Governor's from the hotel&mdash;among others, to a Mr. Harris,
+ who was on horseback; he began to say something, but interrupted himself
+ with the remark:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I'll have to get you to excuse me a minute; yonder is the witness that
+ swore I helped to rob the California coach&mdash;a piece of impertinent
+ intermeddling, sir, for I am not even acquainted with the man."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then he rode over and began to rebuke the stranger with a six-shooter, and
+ the stranger began to explain with another. When the pistols were emptied,
+ the stranger resumed his work (mending a whip-lash), and Mr. Harris rode
+ by with a polite nod, homeward bound, with a bullet through one of his
+ lungs, and several in his hips; and from them issued little rivulets of
+ blood that coursed down the horse's sides and made the animal look quite
+ picturesque. I never saw Harris shoot a man after that but it recalled to
+ mind that first day in Carson.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This was all we saw that day, for it was two o'clock, now, and according
+ to custom the daily "Washoe Zephyr" set in; a soaring dust-drift about the
+ size of the United States set up edgewise came with it, and the capital of
+ Nevada Territory disappeared from view.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Still, there were sights to be seen which were not wholly uninteresting to
+ new comers; for the vast dust cloud was thickly freckled with things
+ strange to the upper air&mdash;things living and dead, that flitted hither
+ and thither, going and coming, appearing and disappearing among the
+ rolling billows of dust&mdash;hats, chickens and parasols sailing in the
+ remote heavens; blankets, tin signs, sage-brush and shingles a shade
+ lower; door-mats and buffalo robes lower still; shovels and coal scuttles
+ on the next grade; glass doors, cats and little children on the next;
+ disrupted lumber yards, light buggies and wheelbarrows on the next; and
+ down only thirty or forty feet above ground was a scurrying storm of
+ emigrating roofs and vacant lots.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link159" id="link159"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="159.jpg (92K)" src="images/159.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was something to see that much. I could have seen more, if I could have
+ kept the dust out of my eyes.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But seriously a Washoe wind is by no means a trifling matter. It blows
+ flimsy houses down, lifts shingle roofs occasionally, rolls up tin ones
+ like sheet music, now and then blows a stage coach over and spills the
+ passengers; and tradition says the reason there are so many bald people
+ there, is, that the wind blows the hair off their heads while they are
+ looking skyward after their hats. Carson streets seldom look inactive on
+ Summer afternoons, because there are so many citizens skipping around
+ their escaping hats, like chambermaids trying to head off a spider.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The "Washoe Zephyr" (Washoe is a pet nickname for Nevada) is a peculiar
+ Scriptural wind, in that no man knoweth "whence it cometh." That is to
+ say, where it originates. It comes right over the mountains from the West,
+ but when one crosses the ridge he does not find any of it on the other
+ side! It probably is manufactured on the mountain-top for the occasion,
+ and starts from there. It is a pretty regular wind, in the summer time.
+ Its office hours are from two in the afternoon till two the next morning;
+ and anybody venturing abroad during those twelve hours needs to allow for
+ the wind or he will bring up a mile or two to leeward of the point he is
+ aiming at. And yet the first complaint a Washoe visitor to San Francisco
+ makes, is that the sea winds blow so, there! There is a good deal of human
+ nature in that.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We found the state palace of the Governor of Nevada Territory to consist
+ of a white frame one-story house with two small rooms in it and a
+ stanchion supported shed in front&mdash;for grandeur&mdash;it compelled
+ the respect of the citizen and inspired the Indians with awe. The newly
+ arrived Chief and Associate Justices of the Territory, and other machinery
+ of the government, were domiciled with less splendor. They were boarding
+ around privately, and had their offices in their bedrooms.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link161" id="link161"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="161.jpg (63K)" src="images/161.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Secretary and I took quarters in the "ranch" of a worthy French lady
+ by the name of Bridget O'Flannigan, a camp follower of his Excellency the
+ Governor. She had known him in his prosperity as commander-in-chief of the
+ Metropolitan Police of New York, and she would not desert him in his
+ adversity as Governor of Nevada.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Our room was on the lower floor, facing the plaza, and when we had got our
+ bed, a small table, two chairs, the government fire-proof safe, and the
+ Unabridged Dictionary into it, there was still room enough left for a
+ visitor&mdash;may be two, but not without straining the walls. But the
+ walls could stand it&mdash;at least the partitions could, for they
+ consisted simply of one thickness of white "cotton domestic" stretched
+ from corner to corner of the room. This was the rule in Carson&mdash;any
+ other kind of partition was the rare exception. And if you stood in a dark
+ room and your neighbors in the next had lights, the shadows on your canvas
+ told queer secrets sometimes! Very often these partitions were made of old
+ flour sacks basted together; and then the difference between the common
+ herd and the aristocracy was, that the common herd had unornamented sacks,
+ while the walls of the aristocrat were overpowering with rudimental fresco&mdash;i.e.,
+ red and blue mill brands on the flour sacks.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link162" id="link162"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="162.jpg (42K)" src="images/162.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Occasionally, also, the better classes embellished their canvas by pasting
+ pictures from Harper's Weekly on them. In many cases, too, the wealthy and
+ the cultured rose to spittoons and other evidences of a sumptuous and
+ luxurious taste. [Washoe people take a joke so hard that I must explain
+ that the above description was only the rule; there were many honorable
+ exceptions in Carson&mdash;plastered ceilings and houses that had
+ considerable furniture in them.&mdash;M. T.]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We had a carpet and a genuine queen's-ware washbowl. Consequently we were
+ hated without reserve by the other tenants of the O'Flannigan "ranch."
+ When we added a painted oilcloth window curtain, we simply took our lives
+ into our own hands. To prevent bloodshed I removed up stairs and took up
+ quarters with the untitled plebeians in one of the fourteen white pine
+ cot-bedsteads that stood in two long ranks in the one sole room of which
+ the second story consisted.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was a jolly company, the fourteen. They were principally voluntary
+ camp-followers of the Governor, who had joined his retinue by their own
+ election at New York and San Francisco and came along, feeling that in the
+ scuffle for little territorial crumbs and offices they could not make
+ their condition more precarious than it was, and might reasonably expect
+ to make it better. They were popularly known as the "Irish Brigade,"
+ though there were only four or five Irishmen among all the Governor's
+ retainers.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link163" id="link163"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="163.jpg (95K)" src="images/163.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ His good-natured Excellency was much annoyed at the gossip his henchmen
+ created&mdash;especially when there arose a rumor that they were paid
+ assassins of his, brought along to quietly reduce the democratic vote when
+ desirable!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Mrs. O'Flannigan was boarding and lodging them at ten dollars a week
+ apiece, and they were cheerfully giving their notes for it. They were
+ perfectly satisfied, but Bridget presently found that notes that could not
+ be discounted were but a feeble constitution for a Carson boarding- house.
+ So she began to harry the Governor to find employment for the "Brigade."
+ Her importunities and theirs together drove him to a gentle desperation at
+ last, and he finally summoned the Brigade to the presence. Then, said he:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gentlemen, I have planned a lucrative and useful service for you&mdash;a
+ service which will provide you with recreation amid noble landscapes, and
+ afford you never ceasing opportunities for enriching your minds by
+ observation and study. I want you to survey a railroad from Carson City
+ westward to a certain point! When the legislature meets I will have the
+ necessary bill passed and the remuneration arranged."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "What, a railroad over the Sierra Nevada Mountains?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, then, survey it eastward to a certain point!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He converted them into surveyors, chain-bearers and so on, and turned them
+ loose in the desert. It was "recreation" with a vengeance! Recreation on
+ foot, lugging chains through sand and sage-brush, under a sultry sun and
+ among cattle bones, cayotes and tarantulas.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link164" id="link164"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="164.jpg (15K)" src="images/164.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Romantic adventure" could go no further. They surveyed very slowly, very
+ deliberately, very carefully. They returned every night during the first
+ week, dusty, footsore, tired, and hungry, but very jolly. They brought in
+ great store of prodigious hairy spiders&mdash;tarantulas&mdash;and
+ imprisoned them in covered tumblers up stairs in the "ranch." After the
+ first week, they had to camp on the field, for they were getting well
+ eastward. They made a good many inquiries as to the location of that
+ indefinite "certain point," but got no information. At last, to a
+ peculiarly urgent inquiry of "How far eastward?" Governor Nye telegraphed
+ back:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "To the Atlantic Ocean, blast you!&mdash;and then bridge it and go on!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This brought back the dusty toilers, who sent in a report and ceased from
+ their labors. The Governor was always comfortable about it; he said Mrs.
+ O'Flannigan would hold him for the Brigade's board anyhow, and he intended
+ to get what entertainment he could out of the boys; he said, with his
+ old-time pleasant twinkle, that he meant to survey them into Utah and then
+ telegraph Brigham to hang them for trespass!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The surveyors brought back more tarantulas with them, and so we had quite
+ a menagerie arranged along the shelves of the room. Some of these spiders
+ could straddle over a common saucer with their hairy, muscular legs, and
+ when their feelings were hurt, or their dignity offended, they were the
+ wickedest-looking desperadoes the animal world can furnish. If their glass
+ prison-houses were touched ever so lightly they were up and spoiling for a
+ fight in a minute. Starchy?&mdash;proud? Indeed, they would take up a
+ straw and pick their teeth like a member of Congress. There was as usual a
+ furious "zephyr" blowing the first night of the brigade's return, and
+ about midnight the roof of an adjoining stable blew off, and a corner of
+ it came crashing through the side of our ranch. There was a simultaneous
+ awakening, and a tumultuous muster of the brigade in the dark, and a
+ general tumbling and sprawling over each other in the narrow aisle between
+ the bedrows. In the midst of the turmoil, Bob H&mdash;&mdash;sprung up out
+ of a sound sleep, and knocked down a shelf with his head. Instantly he
+ shouted:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Turn out, boys&mdash;the tarantulas is loose!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link165" id="link165"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="165.jpg (15K)" src="images/165.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ No warning ever sounded so dreadful. Nobody tried, any longer, to leave
+ the room, lest he might step on a tarantula. Every man groped for a trunk
+ or a bed, and jumped on it. Then followed the strangest silence&mdash;a
+ silence of grisly suspense it was, too&mdash;waiting, expectancy, fear. It
+ was as dark as pitch, and one had to imagine the spectacle of those
+ fourteen scant-clad men roosting gingerly on trunks and beds, for not a
+ thing could be seen. Then came occasional little interruptions of the
+ silence, and one could recognize a man and tell his locality by his voice,
+ or locate any other sound a sufferer made by his gropings or changes of
+ position. The occasional voices were not given to much speaking&mdash;you
+ simply heard a gentle ejaculation of "Ow!" followed by a solid thump, and
+ you knew the gentleman had felt a hairy blanket or something touch his
+ bare skin and had skipped from a bed to the floor. Another silence.
+ Presently you would hear a gasping voice say:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Su&mdash;su&mdash;something's crawling up the back of my neck!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Every now and then you could hear a little subdued scramble and a
+ sorrowful "O Lord!" and then you knew that somebody was getting away from
+ something he took for a tarantula, and not losing any time about it,
+ either. Directly a voice in the corner rang out wild and clear:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I've got him! I've got him!" [Pause, and probable change of
+ circumstances.] "No, he's got me! Oh, ain't they never going to fetch a
+ lantern!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link166" id="link166"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="166.jpg (89K)" src="images/166.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The lantern came at that moment, in the hands of Mrs. O'Flannigan, whose
+ anxiety to know the amount of damage done by the assaulting roof had not
+ prevented her waiting a judicious interval, after getting out of bed and
+ lighting up, to see if the wind was done, now, up stairs, or had a larger
+ contract.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The landscape presented when the lantern flashed into the room was
+ picturesque, and might have been funny to some people, but was not to us.
+ Although we were perched so strangely upon boxes, trunks and beds, and so
+ strangely attired, too, we were too earnestly distressed and too genuinely
+ miserable to see any fun about it, and there was not the semblance of a
+ smile anywhere visible. I know I am not capable of suffering more than I
+ did during those few minutes of suspense in the dark, surrounded by those
+ creeping, bloody-minded tarantulas. I had skipped from bed to bed and from
+ box to box in a cold agony, and every time I touched anything that was
+ furzy I fancied I felt the fangs. I had rather go to war than live that
+ episode over again. Nobody was hurt. The man who thought a tarantula had
+ "got him" was mistaken&mdash;only a crack in a box had caught his finger.
+ Not one of those escaped tarantulas was ever seen again. There were ten or
+ twelve of them. We took candles and hunted the place high and low for
+ them, but with no success. Did we go back to bed then? We did nothing of
+ the kind. Money could not have persuaded us to do it. We sat up the rest
+ of the night playing cribbage and keeping a sharp lookout for the enemy.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch22" id="linkch22"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was the end of August, and the skies were cloudless and the weather
+ superb. In two or three weeks I had grown wonderfully fascinated with the
+ curious new country and concluded to put off my return to "the States"
+ awhile. I had grown well accustomed to wearing a damaged slouch hat, blue
+ woolen shirt, and pants crammed into boot-tops, and gloried in the absence
+ of coat, vest and braces. I felt rowdyish and "bully," (as the historian
+ Josephus phrases it, in his fine chapter upon the destruction of the
+ Temple). It seemed to me that nothing could be so fine and so romantic. I
+ had become an officer of the government, but that was for mere sublimity.
+ The office was an unique sinecure. I had nothing to do and no salary. I
+ was private Secretary to his majesty the Secretary and there was not yet
+ writing enough for two of us. So Johnny K&mdash;&mdash;and I devoted our
+ time to amusement. He was the young son of an Ohio nabob and was out there
+ for recreation. He got it. We had heard a world of talk about the
+ marvellous beauty of Lake Tahoe, and finally curiosity drove us thither to
+ see it. Three or four members of the Brigade had been there and located
+ some timber lands on its shores and stored up a quantity of provisions in
+ their camp. We strapped a couple of blankets on our shoulders and took an
+ axe apiece and started&mdash;for we intended to take up a wood ranch or so
+ ourselves and become wealthy. We were on foot. The reader will find it
+ advantageous to go horseback. We were told that the distance was eleven
+ miles. We tramped a long time on level ground, and then toiled laboriously
+ up a mountain about a thousand miles high and looked over. No lake there.
+ We descended on the other side, crossed the valley and toiled up another
+ mountain three or four thousand miles high, apparently, and looked over
+ again. No lake yet. We sat down tired and perspiring, and hired a couple
+ of Chinamen to curse those people who had beguiled us. Thus refreshed, we
+ presently resumed the march with renewed vigor and determination. We
+ plodded on, two or three hours longer, and at last the Lake burst upon us&mdash;a
+ noble sheet of blue water lifted six thousand three hundred feet above the
+ level of the sea, and walled in by a rim of snow-clad mountain peaks that
+ towered aloft full three thousand feet higher still! It was a vast oval,
+ and one would have to use up eighty or a hundred good miles in traveling
+ around it. As it lay there with the shadows of the mountains brilliantly
+ photographed upon its still surface I thought it must surely be the
+ fairest picture the whole earth affords.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link169" id="link169"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="169.jpg (80K)" src="images/169.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We found the small skiff belonging to the Brigade boys, and without loss
+ of time set out across a deep bend of the lake toward the landmarks that
+ signified the locality of the camp. I got Johnny to row&mdash;not because
+ I mind exertion myself, but because it makes me sick to ride backwards
+ when I am at work. But I steered. A three-mile pull brought us to the camp
+ just as the night fell, and we stepped ashore very tired and wolfishly
+ hungry. In a "cache" among the rocks we found the provisions and the
+ cooking utensils, and then, all fatigued as I was, I sat down on a boulder
+ and superintended while Johnny gathered wood and cooked supper. Many a man
+ who had gone through what I had, would have wanted to rest.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was a delicious supper&mdash;hot bread, fried bacon, and black coffee.
+ It was a delicious solitude we were in, too. Three miles away was a saw-
+ mill and some workmen, but there were not fifteen other human beings
+ throughout the wide circumference of the lake. As the darkness closed down
+ and the stars came out and spangled the great mirror with jewels, we
+ smoked meditatively in the solemn hush and forgot our troubles and our
+ pains. In due time we spread our blankets in the warm sand between two
+ large boulders and soon feel asleep, careless of the procession of ants
+ that passed in through rents in our clothing and explored our persons.
+ Nothing could disturb the sleep that fettered us, for it had been fairly
+ earned, and if our consciences had any sins on them they had to adjourn
+ court for that night, any way. The wind rose just as we were losing
+ consciousness, and we were lulled to sleep by the beating of the surf upon
+ the shore.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It is always very cold on that lake shore in the night, but we had plenty
+ of blankets and were warm enough. We never moved a muscle all night, but
+ waked at early dawn in the original positions, and got up at once,
+ thoroughly refreshed, free from soreness, and brim full of friskiness.
+ There is no end of wholesome medicine in such an experience. That morning
+ we could have whipped ten such people as we were the day before&mdash;sick
+ ones at any rate. But the world is slow, and people will go to "water
+ cures" and "movement cures" and to foreign lands for health. Three months
+ of camp life on Lake Tahoe would restore an Egyptian mummy to his pristine
+ vigor, and give him an appetite like an alligator. I do not mean the
+ oldest and driest mummies, of course, but the fresher ones. The air up
+ there in the clouds is very pure and fine, bracing and delicious. And why
+ shouldn't it be?&mdash;it is the same the angels breathe. I think that
+ hardly any amount of fatigue can be gathered together that a man cannot
+ sleep off in one night on the sand by its side. Not under a roof, but
+ under the sky; it seldom or never rains there in the summer time. I know a
+ man who went there to die. But he made a failure of it. He was a skeleton
+ when he came, and could barely stand. He had no appetite, and did nothing
+ but read tracts and reflect on the future. Three months later he was
+ sleeping out of doors regularly, eating all he could hold, three times a
+ day, and chasing game over mountains three thousand feet high for
+ recreation. And he was a skeleton no longer, but weighed part of a ton.
+ This is no fancy sketch, but the truth. His disease was consumption. I
+ confidently commend his experience to other skeletons.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /> <a name="link170" id="link170"></a>
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="170.jpg (19K)" src="images/170.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; <a
+ name="link171" id="link171"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="171.jpg (34K)" src="images/171.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I superintended again, and as soon as we had eaten breakfast we got in the
+ boat and skirted along the lake shore about three miles and disembarked.
+ We liked the appearance of the place, and so we claimed some three hundred
+ acres of it and stuck our "notices" on a tree. It was yellow pine timber
+ land&mdash;a dense forest of trees a hundred feet high and from one to
+ five feet through at the butt. It was necessary to fence our property or
+ we could not hold it. That is to say, it was necessary to cut down trees
+ here and there and make them fall in such a way as to form a sort of
+ enclosure (with pretty wide gaps in it). We cut down three trees apiece,
+ and found it such heart-breaking work that we decided to "rest our case"
+ on those; if they held the property, well and good; if they didn't, let
+ the property spill out through the gaps and go; it was no use to work
+ ourselves to death merely to save a few acres of land. Next day we came
+ back to build a house&mdash;for a house was also necessary, in order to
+ hold the property.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link172" id="link172"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="172.jpg (142K)" src="images/172.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We decided to build a substantial log- house and excite the envy of the
+ Brigade boys; but by the time we had cut and trimmed the first log it
+ seemed unnecessary to be so elaborate, and so we concluded to build it of
+ saplings. However, two saplings, duly cut and trimmed, compelled
+ recognition of the fact that a still modester architecture would satisfy
+ the law, and so we concluded to build a "brush" house. We devoted the next
+ day to this work, but we did so much "sitting around" and discussing, that
+ by the middle of the afternoon we had achieved only a half-way sort of
+ affair which one of us had to watch while the other cut brush, lest if
+ both turned our backs we might not be able to find it again, it had such a
+ strong family resemblance to the surrounding vegetation. But we were
+ satisfied with it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We were land owners now, duly seized and possessed, and within the
+ protection of the law. Therefore we decided to take up our residence on
+ our own domain and enjoy that large sense of independence which only such
+ an experience can bring. Late the next afternoon, after a good long rest,
+ we sailed away from the Brigade camp with all the provisions and cooking
+ utensils we could carry off&mdash;borrow is the more accurate word&mdash;and
+ just as the night was falling we beached the boat at our own landing.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch23" id="linkch23"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ If there is any life that is happier than the life we led on our timber
+ ranch for the next two or three weeks, it must be a sort of life which I
+ have not read of in books or experienced in person. We did not see a human
+ being but ourselves during the time, or hear any sounds but those that
+ were made by the wind and the waves, the sighing of the pines, and now and
+ then the far-off thunder of an avalanche. The forest about us was dense
+ and cool, the sky above us was cloudless and brilliant with sunshine, the
+ broad lake before us was glassy and clear, or rippled and breezy, or black
+ and storm-tossed, according to Nature's mood; and its circling border of
+ mountain domes, clothed with forests, scarred with land-slides, cloven by
+ canons and valleys, and helmeted with glittering snow, fitly framed and
+ finished the noble picture. The view was always fascinating, bewitching,
+ entrancing. The eye was never tired of gazing, night or day, in calm or
+ storm; it suffered but one grief, and that was that it could not look
+ always, but must close sometimes in sleep.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We slept in the sand close to the water's edge, between two protecting
+ boulders, which took care of the stormy night-winds for us. We never took
+ any paregoric to make us sleep. At the first break of dawn we were always
+ up and running foot-races to tone down excess of physical vigor and
+ exuberance of spirits. That is, Johnny was&mdash;but I held his hat. While
+ smoking the pipe of peace after breakfast we watched the sentinel peaks
+ put on the glory of the sun, and followed the conquering light as it swept
+ down among the shadows, and set the captive crags and forests free. We
+ watched the tinted pictures grow and brighten upon the water till every
+ little detail of forest, precipice and pinnacle was wrought in and
+ finished, and the miracle of the enchanter complete. Then to "business."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link174" id="link174"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="174.jpg (84K)" src="images/174.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ That is, drifting around in the boat. We were on the north shore. There,
+ the rocks on the bottom are sometimes gray, sometimes white. This gives
+ the marvelous transparency of the water a fuller advantage than it has
+ elsewhere on the lake. We usually pushed out a hundred yards or so from
+ shore, and then lay down on the thwarts, in the sun, and let the boat
+ drift by the hour whither it would. We seldom talked. It interrupted the
+ Sabbath stillness, and marred the dreams the luxurious rest and indolence
+ brought. The shore all along was indented with deep, curved bays and
+ coves, bordered by narrow sand-beaches; and where the sand ended, the
+ steep mountain-sides rose right up aloft into space&mdash;rose up like a
+ vast wall a little out of the perpendicular, and thickly wooded with tall
+ pines.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So singularly clear was the water, that where it was only twenty or thirty
+ feet deep the bottom was so perfectly distinct that the boat seemed
+ floating in the air! Yes, where it was even eighty feet deep. Every little
+ pebble was distinct, every speckled trout, every hand's- breadth of sand.
+ Often, as we lay on our faces, a granite boulder, as large as a village
+ church, would start out of the bottom apparently, and seem climbing up
+ rapidly to the surface, till presently it threatened to touch our faces,
+ and we could not resist the impulse to seize an oar and avert the danger.
+ But the boat would float on, and the boulder descend again, and then we
+ could see that when we had been exactly above it, it must still have been
+ twenty or thirty feet below the surface. Down through the transparency of
+ these great depths, the water was not merely transparent, but dazzlingly,
+ brilliantly so. All objects seen through it had a bright, strong
+ vividness, not only of outline, but of every minute detail, which they
+ would not have had when seen simply through the same depth of atmosphere.
+ So empty and airy did all spaces seem below us, and so strong was the
+ sense of floating high aloft in mid-nothingness, that we called these
+ boat-excursions "balloon-voyages."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We fished a good deal, but we did not average one fish a week. We could
+ see trout by the thousand winging about in the emptiness under us, or
+ sleeping in shoals on the bottom, but they would not bite&mdash;they could
+ see the line too plainly, perhaps. We frequently selected the trout we
+ wanted, and rested the bait patiently and persistently on the end of his
+ nose at a depth of eighty feet, but he would only shake it off with an
+ annoyed manner, and shift his position.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We bathed occasionally, but the water was rather chilly, for all it looked
+ so sunny. Sometimes we rowed out to the "blue water," a mile or two from
+ shore. It was as dead blue as indigo there, because of the immense depth.
+ By official measurement the lake in its centre is one thousand five
+ hundred and twenty-five feet deep!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Sometimes, on lazy afternoons, we lolled on the sand in camp, and smoked
+ pipes and read some old well-worn novels. At night, by the camp-fire, we
+ played euchre and seven-up to strengthen the mind&mdash;and played them
+ with cards so greasy and defaced that only a whole summer's acquaintance
+ with them could enable the student to tell the ace of clubs from the jack
+ of diamonds.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We never slept in our "house." It never recurred to us, for one thing; and
+ besides, it was built to hold the ground, and that was enough. We did not
+ wish to strain it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By and by our provisions began to run short, and we went back to the old
+ camp and laid in a new supply. We were gone all day, and reached home
+ again about night-fall, pretty tired and hungry. While Johnny was carrying
+ the main bulk of the provisions up to our "house" for future use, I took
+ the loaf of bread, some slices of bacon, and the coffee-pot, ashore, set
+ them down by a tree, lit a fire, and went back to the boat to get the
+ frying-pan. While I was at this, I heard a shout from Johnny, and looking
+ up I saw that my fire was galloping all over the premises! Johnny was on
+ the other side of it. He had to run through the flames to get to the lake
+ shore, and then we stood helpless and watched the devastation.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The ground was deeply carpeted with dry pine-needles, and the fire touched
+ them off as if they were gunpowder. It was wonderful to see with what
+ fierce speed the tall sheet of flame traveled! My coffee-pot was gone, and
+ everything with it. In a minute and a half the fire seized upon a dense
+ growth of dry manzanita chapparal six or eight feet high, and then the
+ roaring and popping and crackling was something terrific. We were driven
+ to the boat by the intense heat, and there we remained, spell-bound.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link176" id="link176"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="176.jpg (161K)" src="images/176.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Within half an hour all before us was a tossing, blinding tempest of
+ flame! It went surging up adjacent ridges&mdash;surmounted them and
+ disappeared in the canons beyond&mdash;burst into view upon higher and
+ farther ridges, presently&mdash;shed a grander illumination abroad, and
+ dove again&mdash;flamed out again, directly, higher and still higher up
+ the mountain-side- -threw out skirmishing parties of fire here and there,
+ and sent them trailing their crimson spirals away among remote ramparts
+ and ribs and gorges, till as far as the eye could reach the lofty
+ mountain-fronts were webbed as it were with a tangled network of red lava
+ streams. Away across the water the crags and domes were lit with a ruddy
+ glare, and the firmament above was a reflected hell!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Every feature of the spectacle was repeated in the glowing mirror of the
+ lake! Both pictures were sublime, both were beautiful; but that in the
+ lake had a bewildering richness about it that enchanted the eye and held
+ it with the stronger fascination.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We sat absorbed and motionless through four long hours. We never thought
+ of supper, and never felt fatigue. But at eleven o'clock the conflagration
+ had traveled beyond our range of vision, and then darkness stole down upon
+ the landscape again.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Hunger asserted itself now, but there was nothing to eat. The provisions
+ were all cooked, no doubt, but we did not go to see. We were homeless
+ wanderers again, without any property. Our fence was gone, our house
+ burned down; no insurance. Our pine forest was well scorched, the dead
+ trees all burned up, and our broad acres of manzanita swept away. Our
+ blankets were on our usual sand-bed, however, and so we lay down and went
+ to sleep. The next morning we started back to the old camp, but while out
+ a long way from shore, so great a storm came up that we dared not try to
+ land. So I baled out the seas we shipped, and Johnny pulled heavily
+ through the billows till we had reached a point three or four miles beyond
+ the camp. The storm was increasing, and it became evident that it was
+ better to take the hazard of beaching the boat than go down in a hundred
+ fathoms of water; so we ran in, with tall white-caps following, and I sat
+ down in the stern-sheets and pointed her head-on to the shore. The instant
+ the bow struck, a wave came over the stern that washed crew and cargo
+ ashore, and saved a deal of trouble. We shivered in the lee of a boulder
+ all the rest of the day, and froze all the night through. In the morning
+ the tempest had gone down, and we paddled down to the camp without any
+ unnecessary delay. We were so starved that we ate up the rest of the
+ Brigade's provisions, and then set out to Carson to tell them about it and
+ ask their forgiveness. It was accorded, upon payment of damages.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We made many trips to the lake after that, and had many a hair-breadth
+ escape and blood-curdling adventure which will never be recorded in any
+ history.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch24" id="linkch24"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXIV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I resolved to have a horse to ride. I had never seen such wild, free,
+ magnificent horsemanship outside of a circus as these picturesquely-clad
+ Mexicans, Californians and Mexicanized Americans displayed in Carson
+ streets every day. How they rode! Leaning just gently forward out of the
+ perpendicular, easy and nonchalant, with broad slouch-hat brim blown
+ square up in front, and long riata swinging above the head, they swept
+ through the town like the wind! The next minute they were only a sailing
+ puff of dust on the far desert. If they trotted, they sat up gallantly and
+ gracefully, and seemed part of the horse; did not go jiggering up and down
+ after the silly Miss-Nancy fashion of the riding-schools. I had quickly
+ learned to tell a horse from a cow, and was full of anxiety to learn more.
+ I was resolved to buy a horse.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ While the thought was rankling in my mind, the auctioneer came skurrying
+ through the plaza on a black beast that had as many humps and corners on
+ him as a dromedary, and was necessarily uncomely; but he was "going,
+ going, at twenty-two!&mdash;horse, saddle and bridle at twenty-two
+ dollars, gentlemen!" and I could hardly resist.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A man whom I did not know (he turned out to be the auctioneer's brother)
+ noticed the wistful look in my eye, and observed that that was a very
+ remarkable horse to be going at such a price; and added that the saddle
+ alone was worth the money. It was a Spanish saddle, with ponderous
+ 'tapidaros', and furnished with the ungainly sole-leather covering with
+ the unspellable name. I said I had half a notion to bid. Then this
+ keen-eyed person appeared to me to be "taking my measure"; but I dismissed
+ the suspicion when he spoke, for his manner was full of guileless candor
+ and truthfulness. Said he:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I know that horse&mdash;know him well. You are a stranger, I take it, and
+ so you might think he was an American horse, maybe, but I assure you he is
+ not. He is nothing of the kind; but&mdash;excuse my speaking in a low
+ voice, other people being near&mdash;he is, without the shadow of a doubt,
+ a Genuine Mexican Plug!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link179" id="link179"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="179.jpg (96K)" src="images/179.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I did not know what a Genuine Mexican Plug was, but there was something
+ about this man's way of saying it, that made me swear inwardly that I
+ would own a Genuine Mexican Plug, or die.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Has he any other&mdash;er&mdash;advantages?" I inquired, suppressing what
+ eagerness I could.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He hooked his forefinger in the pocket of my army-shirt, led me to one
+ side, and breathed in my ear impressively these words:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "He can out-buck anything in America!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Going, going, going&mdash;at twent&mdash;ty&mdash;four dollars and a
+ half, gen&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Twenty-seven!" I shouted, in a frenzy.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "And sold!" said the auctioneer, and passed over the Genuine Mexican Plug
+ to me.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I could scarcely contain my exultation. I paid the money, and put the
+ animal in a neighboring livery-stable to dine and rest himself.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In the afternoon I brought the creature into the plaza, and certain
+ citizens held him by the head, and others by the tail, while I mounted
+ him. As soon as they let go, he placed all his feet in a bunch together,
+ lowered his back, and then suddenly arched it upward, and shot me straight
+ into the air a matter of three or four feet! I came as straight down
+ again, lit in the saddle, went instantly up again, came down almost on the
+ high pommel, shot up again, and came down on the horse's neck&mdash;all in
+ the space of three or four seconds. Then he rose and stood almost straight
+ up on his hind feet, and I, clasping his lean neck desperately, slid back
+ into the saddle and held on. He came down, and immediately hoisted his
+ heels into the air, delivering a vicious kick at the sky, and stood on his
+ forefeet. And then down he came once more, and began the original exercise
+ of shooting me straight up again. The third time I went up I heard a
+ stranger say:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link180" id="link180"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="180.jpg (50K)" src="images/180.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh, don't he buck, though!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ While I was up, somebody struck the horse a sounding thwack with a
+ leathern strap, and when I arrived again the Genuine Mexican Plug was not
+ there. A California youth chased him up and caught him, and asked if he
+ might have a ride. I granted him that luxury. He mounted the Genuine, got
+ lifted into the air once, but sent his spurs home as he descended, and the
+ horse darted away like a telegram. He soared over three fences like a
+ bird, and disappeared down the road toward the Washoe Valley.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I sat down on a stone, with a sigh, and by a natural impulse one of my
+ hands sought my forehead, and the other the base of my stomach. I believe
+ I never appreciated, till then, the poverty of the human machinery&mdash;for
+ I still needed a hand or two to place elsewhere. Pen cannot describe how I
+ was jolted up. Imagination cannot conceive how disjointed I was&mdash;how
+ internally, externally and universally I was unsettled, mixed up and
+ ruptured. There was a sympathetic crowd around me, though.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link181" id="link181"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="181.jpg (38K)" src="images/181.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One elderly-looking comforter said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Stranger, you've been taken in. Everybody in this camp knows that horse.
+ Any child, any Injun, could have told you that he'd buck; he is the very
+ worst devil to buck on the continent of America. You hear me. I'm Curry.
+ Old Curry. Old Abe Curry. And moreover, he is a simon-pure, out-and-out,
+ genuine d&mdash;d Mexican plug, and an uncommon mean one at that, too.
+ Why, you turnip, if you had laid low and kept dark, there's chances to buy
+ an American horse for mighty little more than you paid for that bloody old
+ foreign relic."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I gave no sign; but I made up my mind that if the auctioneer's brother's
+ funeral took place while I was in the Territory I would postpone all other
+ recreations and attend it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After a gallop of sixteen miles the Californian youth and the Genuine
+ Mexican Plug came tearing into town again, shedding foam-flakes like the
+ spume-spray that drives before a typhoon, and, with one final skip over a
+ wheelbarrow and a Chinaman, cast anchor in front of the "ranch."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link182" id="link182"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="182.jpg (45K)" src="images/182.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Such panting and blowing! Such spreading and contracting of the red equine
+ nostrils, and glaring of the wild equine eye! But was the imperial beast
+ subjugated? Indeed he was not.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ His lordship the Speaker of the House thought he was, and mounted him to
+ go down to the Capitol; but the first dash the creature made was over a
+ pile of telegraph poles half as high as a church; and his time to the
+ Capitol&mdash;one mile and three quarters&mdash;remains unbeaten to this
+ day. But then he took an advantage&mdash;he left out the mile, and only
+ did the three quarters. That is to say, he made a straight cut across
+ lots, preferring fences and ditches to a crooked road; and when the
+ Speaker got to the Capitol he said he had been in the air so much he felt
+ as if he had made the trip on a comet.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link183" id="link183"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="183.jpg (50K)" src="images/183.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In the evening the Speaker came home afoot for exercise, and got the
+ Genuine towed back behind a quartz wagon. The next day I loaned the animal
+ to the Clerk of the House to go down to the Dana silver mine, six miles,
+ and he walked back for exercise, and got the horse towed. Everybody I
+ loaned him to always walked back; they never could get enough exercise any
+ other way.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Still, I continued to loan him to anybody who was willing to borrow him,
+ my idea being to get him crippled, and throw him on the borrower's hands,
+ or killed, and make the borrower pay for him. But somehow nothing ever
+ happened to him. He took chances that no other horse ever took and
+ survived, but he always came out safe. It was his daily habit to try
+ experiments that had always before been considered impossible, but he
+ always got through. Sometimes he miscalculated a little, and did not get
+ his rider through intact, but he always got through himself. Of course I
+ had tried to sell him; but that was a stretch of simplicity which met with
+ little sympathy. The auctioneer stormed up and down the streets on him for
+ four days, dispersing the populace, interrupting business, and destroying
+ children, and never got a bid&mdash;at least never any but the
+ eighteen-dollar one he hired a notoriously substanceless bummer to make.
+ The people only smiled pleasantly, and restrained their desire to buy, if
+ they had any. Then the auctioneer brought in his bill, and I withdrew the
+ horse from the market. We tried to trade him off at private vendue next,
+ offering him at a sacrifice for second-hand tombstones, old iron,
+ temperance tracts&mdash;any kind of property. But holders were stiff, and
+ we retired from the market again. I never tried to ride the horse any
+ more. Walking was good enough exercise for a man like me, that had nothing
+ the matter with him except ruptures, internal injuries, and such things.
+ Finally I tried to give him away. But it was a failure. Parties said
+ earthquakes were handy enough on the Pacific coast&mdash;they did not wish
+ to own one. As a last resort I offered him to the Governor for the use of
+ the "Brigade." His face lit up eagerly at first, but toned down again, and
+ he said the thing would be too palpable.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Just then the livery stable man brought in his bill for six weeks' keeping&mdash;stall-room
+ for the horse, fifteen dollars; hay for the horse, two hundred and fifty!
+ The Genuine Mexican Plug had eaten a ton of the article, and the man said
+ he would have eaten a hundred if he had let him.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I will remark here, in all seriousness, that the regular price of hay
+ during that year and a part of the next was really two hundred and fifty
+ dollars a ton. During a part of the previous year it had sold at five
+ hundred a ton, in gold, and during the winter before that there was such
+ scarcity of the article that in several instances small quantities had
+ brought eight hundred dollars a ton in coin! The consequence might be
+ guessed without my telling it: peopled turned their stock loose to starve,
+ and before the spring arrived Carson and Eagle valleys were almost
+ literally carpeted with their carcases! Any old settler there will verify
+ these statements.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I managed to pay the livery bill, and that same day I gave the Genuine
+ Mexican Plug to a passing Arkansas emigrant whom fortune delivered into my
+ hand. If this ever meets his eye, he will doubtless remember the donation.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Now whoever has had the luck to ride a real Mexican plug will recognize
+ the animal depicted in this chapter, and hardly consider him exaggerated&mdash;but
+ the uninitiated will feel justified in regarding his portrait as a fancy
+ sketch, perhaps.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch25" id="linkch25"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Originally, Nevada was a part of Utah and was called Carson county; and a
+ pretty large county it was, too. Certain of its valleys produced no end of
+ hay, and this attracted small colonies of Mormon stock-raisers and farmers
+ to them. A few orthodox Americans straggled in from California, but no
+ love was lost between the two classes of colonists. There was little or no
+ friendly intercourse; each party staid to itself. The Mormons were largely
+ in the majority, and had the additional advantage of being peculiarly
+ under the protection of the Mormon government of the Territory. Therefore
+ they could afford to be distant, and even peremptory toward their
+ neighbors. One of the traditions of Carson Valley illustrates the
+ condition of things that prevailed at the time I speak of. The hired girl
+ of one of the American families was Irish, and a Catholic; yet it was
+ noted with surprise that she was the only person outside of the Mormon
+ ring who could get favors from the Mormons. She asked kindnesses of them
+ often, and always got them. It was a mystery to everybody. But one day as
+ she was passing out at the door, a large bowie knife dropped from under
+ her apron, and when her mistress asked for an explanation she observed
+ that she was going out to "borry a wash-tub from the Mormons!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link186" id="link186"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="186.jpg (88K)" src="images/186.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In 1858 silver lodes were discovered in "Carson County," and then the
+ aspect of things changed. Californians began to flock in, and the American
+ element was soon in the majority. Allegiance to Brigham Young and Utah was
+ renounced, and a temporary territorial government for "Washoe" was
+ instituted by the citizens. Governor Roop was the first and only chief
+ magistrate of it. In due course of time Congress passed a bill to organize
+ "Nevada Territory," and President Lincoln sent out Governor Nye to
+ supplant Roop.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At this time the population of the Territory was about twelve or fifteen
+ thousand, and rapidly increasing. Silver mines were being vigorously
+ developed and silver mills erected. Business of all kinds was active and
+ prosperous and growing more so day by day.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The people were glad to have a legitimately constituted government, but
+ did not particularly enjoy having strangers from distant States put in
+ authority over them&mdash;a sentiment that was natural enough. They
+ thought the officials should have been chosen from among themselves from
+ among prominent citizens who had earned a right to such promotion, and who
+ would be in sympathy with the populace and likewise thoroughly acquainted
+ with the needs of the Territory. They were right in viewing the matter
+ thus, without doubt. The new officers were "emigrants," and that was no
+ title to anybody's affection or admiration either.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The new government was received with considerable coolness. It was not
+ only a foreign intruder, but a poor one. It was not even worth plucking&mdash;except
+ by the smallest of small fry office-seekers and such. Everybody knew that
+ Congress had appropriated only twenty thousand dollars a year in
+ greenbacks for its support&mdash;about money enough to run a quartz mill a
+ month. And everybody knew, also, that the first year's money was still in
+ Washington, and that the getting hold of it would be a tedious and
+ difficult process. Carson City was too wary and too wise to open up a
+ credit account with the imported bantling with anything like indecent
+ haste.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There is something solemnly funny about the struggles of a new-born
+ Territorial government to get a start in this world. Ours had a trying
+ time of it. The Organic Act and the "instructions" from the State
+ Department commanded that a legislature should be elected at such-and-
+ such a time, and its sittings inaugurated at such-and-such a date. It was
+ easy to get legislators, even at three dollars a day, although board was
+ four dollars and fifty cents, for distinction has its charm in Nevada as
+ well as elsewhere, and there were plenty of patriotic souls out of
+ employment; but to get a legislative hall for them to meet in was another
+ matter altogether. Carson blandly declined to give a room rent-free, or
+ let one to the government on credit.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But when Curry heard of the difficulty, he came forward, solitary and
+ alone, and shouldered the Ship of State over the bar and got her afloat
+ again. I refer to "Curry&mdash;Old Curry&mdash;Old Abe Curry." But for him
+ the legislature would have been obliged to sit in the desert. He offered
+ his large stone building just outside the capital limits, rent-free, and
+ it was gladly accepted. Then he built a horse-railroad from town to the
+ capitol, and carried the legislators gratis.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He also furnished pine benches and chairs for the legislature, and covered
+ the floors with clean saw-dust by way of carpet and spittoon combined. But
+ for Curry the government would have died in its tender infancy. A canvas
+ partition to separate the Senate from the House of Representatives was put
+ up by the Secretary, at a cost of three dollars and forty cents, but the
+ United States declined to pay for it. Upon being reminded that the
+ "instructions" permitted the payment of a liberal rent for a legislative
+ hall, and that that money was saved to the country by Mr. Curry's
+ generosity, the United States said that did not alter the matter, and the
+ three dollars and forty cents would be subtracted from the Secretary's
+ eighteen hundred dollar salary&mdash;and it was!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link188" id="link188"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="188.jpg (30K)" src="images/188.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The matter of printing was from the beginning an interesting feature of
+ the new government's difficulties. The Secretary was sworn to obey his
+ volume of written "instructions," and these commanded him to do two
+ certain things without fail, viz.:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ 1. Get the House and Senate journals printed; and, 2. For this work, pay
+ one dollar and fifty cents per "thousand" for composition, and one dollar
+ and fifty cents per "token" for press-work, in greenbacks.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was easy to swear to do these two things, but it was entirely
+ impossible to do more than one of them. When greenbacks had gone down to
+ forty cents on the dollar, the prices regularly charged everybody by
+ printing establishments were one dollar and fifty cents per "thousand" and
+ one dollar and fifty cents per "token," in gold. The "instructions"
+ commanded that the Secretary regard a paper dollar issued by the
+ government as equal to any other dollar issued by the government. Hence
+ the printing of the journals was discontinued. Then the United States
+ sternly rebuked the Secretary for disregarding the "instructions," and
+ warned him to correct his ways. Wherefore he got some printing done,
+ forwarded the bill to Washington with full exhibits of the high prices of
+ things in the Territory, and called attention to a printed market report
+ wherein it would be observed that even hay was two hundred and fifty
+ dollars a ton. The United States responded by subtracting the printing-
+ bill from the Secretary's suffering salary&mdash;and moreover remarked
+ with dense gravity that he would find nothing in his "instructions"
+ requiring him to purchase hay!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Nothing in this world is palled in such impenetrable obscurity as a U.S.
+ Treasury Comptroller's understanding. The very fires of the hereafter
+ could get up nothing more than a fitful glimmer in it. In the days I speak
+ of he never could be made to comprehend why it was that twenty thousand
+ dollars would not go as far in Nevada, where all commodities ranged at an
+ enormous figure, as it would in the other Territories, where exceeding
+ cheapness was the rule. He was an officer who looked out for the little
+ expenses all the time. The Secretary of the Territory kept his office in
+ his bedroom, as I before remarked; and he charged the United States no
+ rent, although his "instructions" provided for that item and he could have
+ justly taken advantage of it (a thing which I would have done with more
+ than lightning promptness if I had been Secretary myself). But the United
+ States never applauded this devotion. Indeed, I think my country was
+ ashamed to have so improvident a person in its employ.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Those "instructions" (we used to read a chapter from them every morning,
+ as intellectual gymnastics, and a couple of chapters in Sunday school
+ every Sabbath, for they treated of all subjects under the sun and had much
+ valuable religious matter in them along with the other statistics) those
+ "instructions" commanded that pen-knives, envelopes, pens and
+ writing-paper be furnished the members of the legislature. So the
+ Secretary made the purchase and the distribution. The knives cost three
+ dollars apiece. There was one too many, and the Secretary gave it to the
+ Clerk of the House of Representatives. The United States said the Clerk of
+ the House was not a "member" of the legislature, and took that three
+ dollars out of the Secretary's salary, as usual.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ White men charged three or four dollars a "load" for sawing up stove-
+ wood. The Secretary was sagacious enough to know that the United States
+ would never pay any such price as that; so he got an Indian to saw up a
+ load of office wood at one dollar and a half. He made out the usual
+ voucher, but signed no name to it&mdash;simply appended a note explaining
+ that an Indian had done the work, and had done it in a very capable and
+ satisfactory way, but could not sign the voucher owing to lack of ability
+ in the necessary direction. The Secretary had to pay that dollar and a
+ half. He thought the United States would admire both his economy and his
+ honesty in getting the work done at half price and not putting a pretended
+ Indian's signature to the voucher, but the United States did not see it in
+ that light.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The United States was too much accustomed to employing dollar-and-a-half
+ thieves in all manner of official capacities to regard his explanation of
+ the voucher as having any foundation in fact.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link190" id="link190"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="190.jpg (22K)" src="images/190.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But the next time the Indian sawed wood for us I taught him to make a
+ cross at the bottom of the voucher&mdash;it looked like a cross that had
+ been drunk a year&mdash;and then I "witnessed" it and it went through all
+ right. The United States never said a word. I was sorry I had not made the
+ voucher for a thousand loads of wood instead of one.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The government of my country snubs honest simplicity but fondles artistic
+ villainy, and I think I might have developed into a very capable
+ pickpocket if I had remained in the public service a year or two.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ That was a fine collection of sovereigns, that first Nevada legislature.
+ They levied taxes to the amount of thirty or forty thousand dollars and
+ ordered expenditures to the extent of about a million. Yet they had their
+ little periodical explosions of economy like all other bodies of the kind.
+ A member proposed to save three dollars a day to the nation by dispensing
+ with the Chaplain. And yet that short-sighted man needed the Chaplain more
+ than any other member, perhaps, for he generally sat with his feet on his
+ desk, eating raw turnips, during the morning prayer.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link191" id="link191"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="191.jpg (99K)" src="images/191.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The legislature sat sixty days, and passed private tollroad franchises all
+ the time. When they adjourned it was estimated that every citizen owned
+ about three franchises, and it was believed that unless Congress gave the
+ Territory another degree of longitude there would not be room enough to
+ accommodate the toll-roads. The ends of them were hanging over the
+ boundary line everywhere like a fringe.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link192" id="link192"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="192.jpg (29K)" src="images/192.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The fact is, the freighting business had grown to such important
+ proportions that there was nearly as much excitement over suddenly
+ acquired toll-road fortunes as over the wonderful silver mines.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch26" id="linkch26"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXVI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By and by I was smitten with the silver fever. "Prospecting parties" were
+ leaving for the mountains every day, and discovering and taking possession
+ of rich silver-bearing lodes and ledges of quartz. Plainly this was the
+ road to fortune. The great "Gould and Curry" mine was held at three or
+ four hundred dollars a foot when we arrived; but in two months it had
+ sprung up to eight hundred. The "Ophir" had been worth only a mere trifle,
+ a year gone by, and now it was selling at nearly four thousand dollars a
+ foot! Not a mine could be named that had not experienced an astonishing
+ advance in value within a short time. Everybody was talking about these
+ marvels. Go where you would, you heard nothing else, from morning till far
+ into the night. Tom So-and-So had sold out of the "Amanda Smith" for
+ $40,000&mdash;hadn't a cent when he "took up" the ledge six months ago.
+ John Jones had sold half his interest in the "Bald Eagle and Mary Ann" for
+ $65,000, gold coin, and gone to the States for his family. The widow
+ Brewster had "struck it rich" in the "Golden Fleece" and sold ten feet for
+ $18,000&mdash;hadn't money enough to buy a crape bonnet when Sing-Sing
+ Tommy killed her husband at Baldy Johnson's wake last spring. The "Last
+ Chance" had found a "clay casing" and knew they were "right on the ledge"&mdash;consequence,
+ "feet" that went begging yesterday were worth a brick house apiece to-day,
+ and seedy owners who could not get trusted for a drink at any bar in the
+ country yesterday were roaring drunk on champagne to-day and had hosts of
+ warm personal friends in a town where they had forgotten how to bow or
+ shake hands from long-continued want of practice. Johnny Morgan, a common
+ loafer, had gone to sleep in the gutter and waked up worth a hundred
+ thousand dollars, in consequence of the decision in the "Lady Franklin and
+ Rough and Ready" lawsuit. And so on&mdash;day in and day out the talk
+ pelted our ears and the excitement waxed hotter and hotter around us.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I would have been more or less than human if I had not gone mad like the
+ rest. Cart-loads of solid silver bricks, as large as pigs of lead, were
+ arriving from the mills every day, and such sights as that gave substance
+ to the wild talk about me. I succumbed and grew as frenzied as the
+ craziest.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link194" id="link194"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="194.jpg (65K)" src="images/194.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Every few days news would come of the discovery of a bran-new mining
+ region; immediately the papers would teem with accounts of its richness,
+ and away the surplus population would scamper to take possession. By the
+ time I was fairly inoculated with the disease, "Esmeralda" had just had a
+ run and "Humboldt" was beginning to shriek for attention. "Humboldt!
+ Humboldt!" was the new cry, and straightway Humboldt, the newest of the
+ new, the richest of the rich, the most marvellous of the marvellous
+ discoveries in silver-land was occupying two columns of the public prints
+ to "Esmeralda's" one. I was just on the point of starting to Esmeralda,
+ but turned with the tide and got ready for Humboldt. That the reader may
+ see what moved me, and what would as surely have moved him had he been
+ there, I insert here one of the newspaper letters of the day. It and
+ several other letters from the same calm hand were the main means of
+ converting me. I shall not garble the extract, but put it in just as it
+ appeared in the Daily Territorial Enterprise:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ But what about our mines? I shall be candid with you. I shall express an
+ honest opinion, based upon a thorough examination. Humboldt county is
+ the richest mineral region upon God's footstool. Each mountain range is
+ gorged with the precious ores. Humboldt is the true Golconda.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The other day an assay of mere croppings yielded exceeding four thousand
+ dollars to the ton. A week or two ago an assay of just such surface
+ developments made returns of seven thousand dollars to the ton. Our
+ mountains are full of rambling prospectors. Each day and almost every
+ hour reveals new and more startling evidences of the profuse and
+ intensified wealth of our favored county. The metal is not silver alone.
+ There are distinct ledges of auriferous ore. A late discovery plainly
+ evinces cinnabar. The coarser metals are in gross abundance. Lately
+ evidences of bituminous coal have been detected. My theory has ever been
+ that coal is a ligneous formation. I told Col. Whitman, in times past,
+ that the neighborhood of Dayton (Nevada) betrayed no present or previous
+ manifestations of a ligneous foundation, and that hence I had no
+ confidence in his lauded coal mines. I repeated the same doctrine to the
+ exultant coal discoverers of Humboldt. I talked with my friend Captain
+ Burch on the subject. My pyrhanism vanished upon his statement that in
+ the very region referred to he had seen petrified trees of the length of
+ two hundred feet. Then is the fact established that huge forests once
+ cast their grim shadows over this remote section. I am firm in the coal
+ faith. Have no fears of the mineral resources of Humboldt county. They
+ are immense&mdash;incalculable.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ Let me state one or two things which will help the reader to better
+ comprehend certain items in the above. At this time, our near neighbor,
+ Gold Hill, was the most successful silver mining locality in Nevada. It
+ was from there that more than half the daily shipments of silver bricks
+ came. "Very rich" (and scarce) Gold Hill ore yielded from $100 to $400 to
+ the ton; but the usual yield was only $20 to $40 per ton&mdash;that is to
+ say, each hundred pounds of ore yielded from one dollar to two dollars.
+ But the reader will perceive by the above extract, that in Humboldt from
+ one fourth to nearly half the mass was silver! That is to say, every one
+ hundred pounds of the ore had from two hundred dollars up to about three
+ hundred and fifty in it. Some days later this same correspondent wrote:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ I have spoken of the vast and almost fabulous wealth of this region&mdash;it
+ is incredible. The intestines of our mountains are gorged with precious
+ ore to plethora. I have said that nature has so shaped our mountains as
+ to furnish most excellent facilities for the working of our mines. I
+ have also told you that the country about here is pregnant with the
+ finest mill sites in the world. But what is the mining history of
+ Humboldt? The Sheba mine is in the hands of energetic San Francisco
+ capitalists. It would seem that the ore is combined with metals that
+ render it difficult of reduction with our imperfect mountain machinery.
+ The proprietors have combined the capital and labor hinted at in my
+ exordium. They are toiling and probing. Their tunnel has reached the
+ length of one hundred feet. From primal assays alone, coupled with the
+ development of the mine and public confidence in the continuance of
+ effort, the stock had reared itself to eight hundred dollars market
+ value. I do not know that one ton of the ore has been converted into
+ current metal. I do know that there are many lodes in this section that
+ surpass the Sheba in primal assay value. Listen a moment to the
+ calculations of the Sheba operators. They purpose transporting the ore
+ concentrated to Europe. The conveyance from Star City (its locality) to
+ Virginia City will cost seventy dollars per ton; from Virginia to San
+ Francisco, forty dollars per ton; from thence to Liverpool, its
+ destination, ten dollars per ton. Their idea is that its conglomerate
+ metals will reimburse them their cost of original extraction, the price
+ of transportation, and the expense of reduction, and that then a ton of
+ the raw ore will net them twelve hundred dollars. The estimate may be
+ extravagant. Cut it in twain, and the product is enormous, far
+ transcending any previous developments of our racy Territory.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A very common calculation is that many of our mines will yield five
+ hundred dollars to the ton. Such fecundity throws the Gould &amp; Curry,
+ the Ophir and the Mexican, of your neighborhood, in the darkest shadow.
+ I have given you the estimate of the value of a single developed mine.
+ Its richness is indexed by its market valuation. The people of Humboldt
+ county are feet crazy. As I write, our towns are near deserted. They
+ look as languid as a consumptive girl. What has become of our sinewy and
+ athletic fellow-citizens? They are coursing through ravines and over
+ mountain tops. Their tracks are visible in every direction. Occasionally
+ a horseman will dash among us. His steed betrays hard usage. He alights
+ before his adobe dwelling, hastily exchanges courtesies with his
+ townsmen, hurries to an assay office and from thence to the District
+ Recorder's. In the morning, having renewed his provisional supplies, he
+ is off again on his wild and unbeaten route. Why, the fellow numbers
+ already his feet by the thousands. He is the horse-leech. He has the
+ craving stomach of the shark or anaconda. He would conquer metallic
+ worlds.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link196" id="link196"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="196.jpg (187K)" src="images/196.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This was enough. The instant we had finished reading the above article,
+ four of us decided to go to Humboldt. We commenced getting ready at once.
+ And we also commenced upbraiding ourselves for not deciding sooner&mdash;for
+ we were in terror lest all the rich mines would be found and secured
+ before we got there, and we might have to put up with ledges that would
+ not yield more than two or three hundred dollars a ton, maybe. An hour
+ before, I would have felt opulent if I had owned ten feet in a Gold Hill
+ mine whose ore produced twenty-five dollars to the ton; now I was already
+ annoyed at the prospect of having to put up with mines the poorest of
+ which would be a marvel in Gold Hill.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch27" id="linkch27"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXVII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Hurry, was the word! We wasted no time. Our party consisted of four
+ persons&mdash;a blacksmith sixty years of age, two young lawyers, and
+ myself. We bought a wagon and two miserable old horses. We put eighteen
+ hundred pounds of provisions and mining tools in the wagon and drove out
+ of Carson on a chilly December afternoon. The horses were so weak and old
+ that we soon found that it would be better if one or two of us got out and
+ walked. It was an improvement. Next, we found that it would be better if a
+ third man got out. That was an improvement also. It was at this time that
+ I volunteered to drive, although I had never driven a harnessed horse
+ before and many a man in such a position would have felt fairly excused
+ from such a responsibility. But in a little while it was found that it
+ would be a fine thing if the drive got out and walked also. It was at this
+ time that I resigned the position of driver, and never resumed it again.
+ Within the hour, we found that it would not only be better, but was
+ absolutely necessary, that we four, taking turns, two at a time, should
+ put our hands against the end of the wagon and push it through the sand,
+ leaving the feeble horses little to do but keep out of the way and hold up
+ the tongue. Perhaps it is well for one to know his fate at first, and get
+ reconciled to it. We had learned ours in one afternoon. It was plain that
+ we had to walk through the sand and shove that wagon and those horses two
+ hundred miles. So we accepted the situation, and from that time forth we
+ never rode. More than that, we stood regular and nearly constant watches
+ pushing up behind.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We made seven miles, and camped in the desert. Young Clagett (now member
+ of Congress from Montana) unharnessed and fed and watered the horses;
+ Oliphant and I cut sagebrush, built the fire and brought water to cook
+ with; and old Mr. Ballou the blacksmith did the cooking. This division of
+ labor, and this appointment, was adhered to throughout the journey. We had
+ no tent, and so we slept under our blankets in the open plain. We were so
+ tired that we slept soundly.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link199" id="link199"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="199.jpg (54K)" src="images/199.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We were fifteen days making the trip&mdash;two hundred miles; thirteen,
+ rather, for we lay by a couple of days, in one place, to let the horses
+ rest.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We could really have accomplished the journey in ten days if we had towed
+ the horses behind the wagon, but we did not think of that until it was too
+ late, and so went on shoving the horses and the wagon too when we might
+ have saved half the labor. Parties who met us, occasionally, advised us to
+ put the horses in the wagon, but Mr. Ballou, through whose iron-clad
+ earnestness no sarcasm could pierce, said that that would not do, because
+ the provisions were exposed and would suffer, the horses being "bituminous
+ from long deprivation." The reader will excuse me from translating. What
+ Mr. Ballou customarily meant, when he used a long word, was a secret
+ between himself and his Maker. He was one of the best and kindest hearted
+ men that ever graced a humble sphere of life. He was gentleness and
+ simplicity itself&mdash;and unselfishness, too. Although he was more than
+ twice as old as the eldest of us, he never gave himself any airs,
+ privileges, or exemptions on that account. He did a young man's share of
+ the work; and did his share of conversing and entertaining from the
+ general stand-point of any age&mdash;not from the arrogant, overawing
+ summit-height of sixty years. His one striking peculiarity was his
+ Partingtonian fashion of loving and using big words for their own sakes,
+ and independent of any bearing they might have upon the thought he was
+ purposing to convey. He always let his ponderous syllables fall with an
+ easy unconsciousness that left them wholly without offensiveness. In truth
+ his air was so natural and so simple that one was always catching himself
+ accepting his stately sentences as meaning something, when they really
+ meant nothing in the world. If a word was long and grand and resonant,
+ that was sufficient to win the old man's love, and he would drop that word
+ into the most out-of-the-way place in a sentence or a subject, and be as
+ pleased with it as if it were perfectly luminous with meaning.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link201" id="link201"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="201.jpg (62K)" src="images/201.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We four always spread our common stock of blankets together on the frozen
+ ground, and slept side by side; and finding that our foolish, long-legged
+ hound pup had a deal of animal heat in him, Oliphant got to admitting him
+ to the bed, between himself and Mr. Ballou, hugging the dog's warm back to
+ his breast and finding great comfort in it. But in the night the pup would
+ get stretchy and brace his feet against the old man's back and shove,
+ grunting complacently the while; and now and then, being warm and snug,
+ grateful and happy, he would paw the old man's back simply in excess of
+ comfort; and at yet other times he would dream of the chase and in his
+ sleep tug at the old man's back hair and bark in his ear. The old
+ gentleman complained mildly about these familiarities, at last, and when
+ he got through with his statement he said that such a dog as that was not
+ a proper animal to admit to bed with tired men, because he was "so
+ meretricious in his movements and so organic in his emotions." We turned
+ the dog out.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was a hard, wearing, toilsome journey, but it had its bright side; for
+ after each day was done and our wolfish hunger appeased with a hot supper
+ of fried bacon, bread, molasses and black coffee, the pipe-smoking, song-
+ singing and yarn-spinning around the evening camp-fire in the still
+ solitudes of the desert was a happy, care-free sort of recreation that
+ seemed the very summit and culmination of earthly luxury.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It is a kind of life that has a potent charm for all men, whether city or
+ country-bred. We are descended from desert-lounging Arabs, and countless
+ ages of growth toward perfect civilization have failed to root out of us
+ the nomadic instinct. We all confess to a gratified thrill at the thought
+ of "camping out."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Once we made twenty-five miles in a day, and once we made forty miles
+ (through the Great American Desert), and ten miles beyond&mdash;fifty in
+ all&mdash;in twenty-three hours, without halting to eat, drink or rest. To
+ stretch out and go to sleep, even on stony and frozen ground, after
+ pushing a wagon and two horses fifty miles, is a delight so supreme that
+ for the moment it almost seems cheap at the price.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We camped two days in the neighborhood of the "Sink of the Humboldt." We
+ tried to use the strong alkaline water of the Sink, but it would not
+ answer. It was like drinking lye, and not weak lye, either. It left a
+ taste in the mouth, bitter and every way execrable, and a burning in the
+ stomach that was very uncomfortable. We put molasses in it, but that
+ helped it very little; we added a pickle, yet the alkali was the prominent
+ taste and so it was unfit for drinking.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link202" id="link202"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="205.jpg (58K)" src="images/205.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The coffee we made of this water was the meanest compound man has yet
+ invented. It was really viler to the taste than the unameliorated water
+ itself. Mr. Ballou, being the architect and builder of the beverage felt
+ constrained to endorse and uphold it, and so drank half a cup, by little
+ sips, making shift to praise it faintly the while, but finally threw out
+ the remainder, and said frankly it was "too technical for him."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But presently we found a spring of fresh water, convenient, and then, with
+ nothing to mar our enjoyment, and no stragglers to interrupt it, we
+ entered into our rest.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch28" id="linkch28"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXVIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After leaving the Sink, we traveled along the Humboldt river a little way.
+ People accustomed to the monster mile-wide Mississippi, grow accustomed to
+ associating the term "river" with a high degree of watery grandeur.
+ Consequently, such people feel rather disappointed when they stand on the
+ shores of the Humboldt or the Carson and find that a "river" in Nevada is
+ a sickly rivulet which is just the counterpart of the Erie canal in all
+ respects save that the canal is twice as long and four times as deep. One
+ of the pleasantest and most invigorating exercises one can contrive is to
+ run and jump across the Humboldt river till he is overheated, and then
+ drink it dry.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On the fifteenth day we completed our march of two hundred miles and
+ entered Unionville, Humboldt county, in the midst of a driving snow-
+ storm. Unionville consisted of eleven cabins and a liberty-pole. Six of
+ the cabins were strung along one side of a deep canyon, and the other five
+ faced them. The rest of the landscape was made up of bleak mountain walls
+ that rose so high into the sky from both sides of the canyon that the
+ village was left, as it were, far down in the bottom of a crevice. It was
+ always daylight on the mountain tops a long time before the darkness
+ lifted and revealed Unionville.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We built a small, rude cabin in the side of the crevice and roofed it with
+ canvas, leaving a corner open to serve as a chimney, through which the
+ cattle used to tumble occasionally, at night, and mash our furniture and
+ interrupt our sleep. It was very cold weather and fuel was scarce. Indians
+ brought brush and bushes several miles on their backs; and when we could
+ catch a laden Indian it was well&mdash;and when we could not (which was
+ the rule, not the exception), we shivered and bore it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link205" id="link205"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="205.jpg (58K)" src="images/205.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I confess, without shame, that I expected to find masses of silver lying
+ all about the ground. I expected to see it glittering in the sun on the
+ mountain summits. I said nothing about this, for some instinct told me
+ that I might possibly have an exaggerated idea about it, and so if I
+ betrayed my thought I might bring derision upon myself. Yet I was as
+ perfectly satisfied in my own mind as I could be of anything, that I was
+ going to gather up, in a day or two, or at furthest a week or two, silver
+ enough to make me satisfactorily wealthy&mdash;and so my fancy was already
+ busy with plans for spending this money. The first opportunity that
+ offered, I sauntered carelessly away from the cabin, keeping an eye on the
+ other boys, and stopping and contemplating the sky when they seemed to be
+ observing me; but as soon as the coast was manifestly clear, I fled away
+ as guiltily as a thief might have done and never halted till I was far
+ beyond sight and call. Then I began my search with a feverish excitement
+ that was brimful of expectation&mdash;almost of certainty. I crawled about
+ the ground, seizing and examining bits of stone, blowing the dust from
+ them or rubbing them on my clothes, and then peering at them with anxious
+ hope. Presently I found a bright fragment and my heart bounded! I hid
+ behind a boulder and polished it and scrutinized it with a nervous
+ eagerness and a delight that was more pronounced than absolute certainty
+ itself could have afforded. The more I examined the fragment the more I
+ was convinced that I had found the door to fortune. I marked the spot and
+ carried away my specimen. Up and down the rugged mountain side I searched,
+ with always increasing interest and always augmenting gratitude that I had
+ come to Humboldt and come in time. Of all the experiences of my life, this
+ secret search among the hidden treasures of silver-land was the nearest to
+ unmarred ecstasy. It was a delirious revel.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By and by, in the bed of a shallow rivulet, I found a deposit of shining
+ yellow scales, and my breath almost forsook me! A gold mine, and in my
+ simplicity I had been content with vulgar silver! I was so excited that I
+ half believed my overwrought imagination was deceiving me. Then a fear
+ came upon me that people might be observing me and would guess my secret.
+ Moved by this thought, I made a circuit of the place, and ascended a knoll
+ to reconnoiter. Solitude. No creature was near. Then I returned to my
+ mine, fortifying myself against possible disappointment, but my fears were
+ groundless&mdash;the shining scales were still there. I set about scooping
+ them out, and for an hour I toiled down the windings of the stream and
+ robbed its bed. But at last the descending sun warned me to give up the
+ quest, and I turned homeward laden with wealth. As I walked along I could
+ not help smiling at the thought of my being so excited over my fragment of
+ silver when a nobler metal was almost under my nose. In this little time
+ the former had so fallen in my estimation that once or twice I was on the
+ point of throwing it away.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The boys were as hungry as usual, but I could eat nothing. Neither could I
+ talk. I was full of dreams and far away. Their conversation interrupted
+ the flow of my fancy somewhat, and annoyed me a little, too. I despised
+ the sordid and commonplace things they talked about. But as they
+ proceeded, it began to amuse me. It grew to be rare fun to hear them
+ planning their poor little economies and sighing over possible privations
+ and distresses when a gold mine, all our own, lay within sight of the
+ cabin and I could point it out at any moment. Smothered hilarity began to
+ oppress me, presently. It was hard to resist the impulse to burst out with
+ exultation and reveal everything; but I did resist. I said within myself
+ that I would filter the great news through my lips calmly and be serene as
+ a summer morning while I watched its effect in their faces. I said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Where have you all been?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Prospecting."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "What did you find?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Nothing."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Nothing? What do you think of the country?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Can't tell, yet," said Mr. Ballou, who was an old gold miner, and had
+ likewise had considerable experience among the silver mines.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, haven't you formed any sort of opinion?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Yes, a sort of a one. It's fair enough here, may be, but overrated. Seven
+ thousand dollar ledges are scarce, though.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "That Sheba may be rich enough, but we don't own it; and besides, the rock
+ is so full of base metals that all the science in the world can't work it.
+ We'll not starve, here, but we'll not get rich, I'm afraid."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "So you think the prospect is pretty poor?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No name for it!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, we'd better go back, hadn't we?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh, not yet&mdash;of course not. We'll try it a riffle, first."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Suppose, now&mdash;this is merely a supposition, you know&mdash;suppose
+ you could find a ledge that would yield, say, a hundred and fifty dollars
+ a ton&mdash;would that satisfy you?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Try us once!" from the whole party.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Or suppose&mdash;merely a supposition, of course&mdash;suppose you were
+ to find a ledge that would yield two thousand dollars a ton&mdash;would
+ that satisfy you?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Here&mdash;what do you mean? What are you coming at? Is there some
+ mystery behind all this?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Never mind. I am not saying anything. You know perfectly well there are
+ no rich mines here&mdash;of course you do. Because you have been around
+ and examined for yourselves. Anybody would know that, that had been
+ around. But just for the sake of argument, suppose&mdash;in a kind of
+ general way&mdash;suppose some person were to tell you that
+ two-thousand-dollar ledges were simply contemptible&mdash;contemptible,
+ understand&mdash;and that right yonder in sight of this very cabin there
+ were piles of pure gold and pure silver&mdash;oceans of it&mdash;enough to
+ make you all rich in twenty-four hours! Come!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I should say he was as crazy as a loon!" said old Ballou, but wild with
+ excitement, nevertheless.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gentlemen," said I, "I don't say anything&mdash;I haven't been around,
+ you know, and of course don't know anything&mdash;but all I ask of you is
+ to cast your eye on that, for instance, and tell me what you think of it!"
+ and I tossed my treasure before them.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link207" id="link207"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="207.jpg (92K)" src="images/207.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There was an eager scramble for it, and a closing of heads together over
+ it under the candle-light. Then old Ballou said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Think of it? I think it is nothing but a lot of granite rubbish and nasty
+ glittering mica that isn't worth ten cents an acre!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So vanished my dream. So melted my wealth away. So toppled my airy castle
+ to the earth and left me stricken and forlorn.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Moralizing, I observed, then, that "all that glitters is not gold."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Mr. Ballou said I could go further than that, and lay it up among my
+ treasures of knowledge, that nothing that glitters is gold. So I learned
+ then, once for all, that gold in its native state is but dull,
+ unornamental stuff, and that only low-born metals excite the admiration of
+ the ignorant with an ostentatious glitter. However, like the rest of the
+ world, I still go on underrating men of gold and glorifying men of mica.
+ Commonplace human nature cannot rise above that.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch29" id="linkch29"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXIX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ True knowledge of the nature of silver mining came fast enough. We went
+ out "prospecting" with Mr. Ballou. We climbed the mountain sides, and
+ clambered among sage-brush, rocks and snow till we were ready to drop with
+ exhaustion, but found no silver&mdash;nor yet any gold. Day after day we
+ did this. Now and then we came upon holes burrowed a few feet into the
+ declivities and apparently abandoned; and now and then we found one or two
+ listless men still burrowing. But there was no appearance of silver. These
+ holes were the beginnings of tunnels, and the purpose was to drive them
+ hundreds of feet into the mountain, and some day tap the hidden ledge
+ where the silver was. Some day! It seemed far enough away, and very
+ hopeless and dreary. Day after day we toiled, and climbed and searched,
+ and we younger partners grew sicker and still sicker of the promiseless
+ toil. At last we halted under a beetling rampart of rock which projected
+ from the earth high upon the mountain. Mr. Ballou broke off some fragments
+ with a hammer, and examined them long and attentively with a small
+ eye-glass; threw them away and broke off more; said this rock was quartz,
+ and quartz was the sort of rock that contained silver. Contained it! I had
+ thought that at least it would be caked on the outside of it like a kind
+ of veneering. He still broke off pieces and critically examined them, now
+ and then wetting the piece with his tongue and applying the glass. At last
+ he exclaimed:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "We've got it!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link210" id="link210"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="210.jpg (74K)" src="images/210.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We were full of anxiety in a moment. The rock was clean and white, where
+ it was broken, and across it ran a ragged thread of blue. He said that
+ that little thread had silver in it, mixed with base metal, such as lead
+ and antimony, and other rubbish, and that there was a speck or two of gold
+ visible. After a great deal of effort we managed to discern some little
+ fine yellow specks, and judged that a couple of tons of them massed
+ together might make a gold dollar, possibly. We were not jubilant, but Mr.
+ Ballou said there were worse ledges in the world than that. He saved what
+ he called the "richest" piece of the rock, in order to determine its value
+ by the process called the "fire-assay." Then we named the mine "Monarch of
+ the Mountains" (modesty of nomenclature is not a prominent feature in the
+ mines), and Mr. Ballou wrote out and stuck up the following "notice,"
+ preserving a copy to be entered upon the books in the mining recorder's
+ office in the town.
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "NOTICE."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "We the undersigned claim three claims, of three hundred feet each (and
+ one for discovery), on this silver-bearing quartz lead or lode,
+ extending north and south from this notice, with all its dips, spurs,
+ and angles, variations and sinuosities, together with fifty feet of
+ ground on either side for working the same."
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ We put our names to it and tried to feel that our fortunes were made. But
+ when we talked the matter all over with Mr. Ballou, we felt depressed and
+ dubious. He said that this surface quartz was not all there was of our
+ mine; but that the wall or ledge of rock called the "Monarch of the
+ Mountains," extended down hundreds and hundreds of feet into the earth&mdash;he
+ illustrated by saying it was like a curb-stone, and maintained a nearly
+ uniform thickness-say twenty feet&mdash;away down into the bowels of the
+ earth, and was perfectly distinct from the casing rock on each side of it;
+ and that it kept to itself, and maintained its distinctive character
+ always, no matter how deep it extended into the earth or how far it
+ stretched itself through and across the hills and valleys. He said it
+ might be a mile deep and ten miles long, for all we knew; and that
+ wherever we bored into it above ground or below, we would find gold and
+ silver in it, but no gold or silver in the meaner rock it was cased
+ between. And he said that down in the great depths of the ledge was its
+ richness, and the deeper it went the richer it grew. Therefore, instead of
+ working here on the surface, we must either bore down into the rock with a
+ shaft till we came to where it was rich&mdash;say a hundred feet or so&mdash;or
+ else we must go down into the valley and bore a long tunnel into the
+ mountain side and tap the ledge far under the earth. To do either was
+ plainly the labor of months; for we could blast and bore only a few feet a
+ day&mdash;some five or six. But this was not all. He said that after we
+ got the ore out it must be hauled in wagons to a distant silver-mill,
+ ground up, and the silver extracted by a tedious and costly process. Our
+ fortune seemed a century away!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But we went to work. We decided to sink a shaft. So, for a week we climbed
+ the mountain, laden with picks, drills, gads, crowbars, shovels, cans of
+ blasting powder and coils of fuse and strove with might and main. At first
+ the rock was broken and loose and we dug it up with picks and threw it out
+ with shovels, and the hole progressed very well. But the rock became more
+ compact, presently, and gads and crowbars came into play. But shortly
+ nothing could make an impression but blasting powder.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ That was the weariest work! One of us held the iron drill in its place and
+ another would strike with an eight-pound sledge&mdash;it was like driving
+ nails on a large scale. In the course of an hour or two the drill would
+ reach a depth of two or three feet, making a hole a couple of inches in
+ diameter. We would put in a charge of powder, insert half a yard of fuse,
+ pour in sand and gravel and ram it down, then light the fuse and run. When
+ the explosion came and the rocks and smoke shot into the air, we would go
+ back and find about a bushel of that hard, rebellious quartz jolted out.
+ Nothing more. One week of this satisfied me. I resigned. Clagget and
+ Oliphant followed. Our shaft was only twelve feet deep. We decided that a
+ tunnel was the thing we wanted.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link212" id="link212"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="212.jpg (89K)" src="images/212.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So we went down the mountain side and worked a week; at the end of which
+ time we had blasted a tunnel about deep enough to hide a hogshead in, and
+ judged that about nine hundred feet more of it would reach the ledge. I
+ resigned again, and the other boys only held out one day longer. We
+ decided that a tunnel was not what we wanted. We wanted a ledge that was
+ already "developed." There were none in the camp.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We dropped the "Monarch" for the time being.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Meantime the camp was filling up with people, and there was a constantly
+ growing excitement about our Humboldt mines. We fell victims to the
+ epidemic and strained every nerve to acquire more "feet." We prospected
+ and took up new claims, put "notices" on them and gave them grandiloquent
+ names. We traded some of our "feet" for "feet" in other people's claims.
+ In a little while we owned largely in the "Gray Eagle," the "Columbiana,"
+ the "Branch Mint," the "Maria Jane," the "Universe," the "Root-Hog-or-
+ Die," the "Samson and Delilah," the "Treasure Trove," the "Golconda," the
+ "Sultana," the "Boomerang," the "Great Republic," the "Grand Mogul," and
+ fifty other "mines" that had never been molested by a shovel or scratched
+ with a pick. We had not less than thirty thousand "feet" apiece in the
+ "richest mines on earth" as the frenzied cant phrased it&mdash;and were in
+ debt to the butcher. We were stark mad with excitement&mdash;drunk with
+ happiness&mdash;smothered under mountains of prospective wealth&mdash;arrogantly
+ compassionate toward the plodding millions who knew not our marvellous
+ canyon&mdash;but our credit was not good at the grocer's.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was the strangest phase of life one can imagine. It was a beggars'
+ revel. There was nothing doing in the district&mdash;no mining&mdash;no
+ milling&mdash;no productive effort&mdash;no income&mdash;and not enough
+ money in the entire camp to buy a corner lot in an eastern village,
+ hardly; and yet a stranger would have supposed he was walking among
+ bloated millionaires. Prospecting parties swarmed out of town with the
+ first flush of dawn, and swarmed in again at nightfall laden with spoil&mdash;rocks.
+ Nothing but rocks. Every man's pockets were full of them; the floor of his
+ cabin was littered with them; they were disposed in labeled rows on his
+ shelves.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link214" id="link214"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="214.jpg (51K)" src="images/214.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch30" id="linkch30"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I met men at every turn who owned from one thousand to thirty thousand
+ "feet" in undeveloped silver mines, every single foot of which they
+ believed would shortly be worth from fifty to a thousand dollars&mdash;and
+ as often as any other way they were men who had not twenty-five dollars in
+ the world. Every man you met had his new mine to boast of, and his
+ "specimens" ready; and if the opportunity offered, he would infallibly
+ back you into a corner and offer as a favor to you, not to him, to part
+ with just a few feet in the "Golden Age," or the "Sarah Jane," or some
+ other unknown stack of croppings, for money enough to get a "square meal"
+ with, as the phrase went. And you were never to reveal that he had made
+ you the offer at such a ruinous price, for it was only out of friendship
+ for you that he was willing to make the sacrifice. Then he would fish a
+ piece of rock out of his pocket, and after looking mysteriously around as
+ if he feared he might be waylaid and robbed if caught with such wealth in
+ his possession, he would dab the rock against his tongue, clap an eyeglass
+ to it, and exclaim:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Look at that! Right there in that red dirt! See it? See the specks of
+ gold? And the streak of silver? That's from the Uncle Abe. There's a
+ hundred thousand tons like that in sight! Right in sight, mind you! And
+ when we get down on it and the ledge comes in solid, it will be the
+ richest thing in the world! Look at the assay! I don't want you to believe
+ me&mdash;look at the assay!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link216" id="link216"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="216.jpg (63K)" src="images/216.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then he would get out a greasy sheet of paper which showed that the
+ portion of rock assayed had given evidence of containing silver and gold
+ in the proportion of so many hundreds or thousands of dollars to the ton.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I little knew, then, that the custom was to hunt out the richest piece of
+ rock and get it assayed! Very often, that piece, the size of a filbert,
+ was the only fragment in a ton that had a particle of metal in it&mdash;and
+ yet the assay made it pretend to represent the average value of the ton of
+ rubbish it came from!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On such a system of assaying as that, the Humboldt world had gone crazy.
+ On the authority of such assays its newspaper correspondents were frothing
+ about rock worth four and seven thousand dollars a ton!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And does the reader remember, a few pages back, the calculations, of a
+ quoted correspondent, whereby the ore is to be mined and shipped all the
+ way to England, the metals extracted, and the gold and silver contents
+ received back by the miners as clear profit, the copper, antimony and
+ other things in the ore being sufficient to pay all the expenses incurred?
+ Everybody's head was full of such "calculations" as those&mdash;such
+ raving insanity, rather. Few people took work into their calculations&mdash;or
+ outlay of money either; except the work and expenditures of other people.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We never touched our tunnel or our shaft again. Why? Because we judged
+ that we had learned the real secret of success in silver mining&mdash;which
+ was, not to mine the silver ourselves by the sweat of our brows and the
+ labor of our hands, but to sell the ledges to the dull slaves of toil and
+ let them do the mining!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Before leaving Carson, the Secretary and I had purchased "feet" from
+ various Esmeralda stragglers. We had expected immediate returns of
+ bullion, but were only afflicted with regular and constant "assessments"
+ instead&mdash;demands for money wherewith to develop the said mines. These
+ assessments had grown so oppressive that it seemed necessary to look into
+ the matter personally. Therefore I projected a pilgrimage to Carson and
+ thence to Esmeralda. I bought a horse and started, in company with Mr.
+ Ballou and a gentleman named Ollendorff, a Prussian&mdash;not the party
+ who has inflicted so much suffering on the world with his wretched foreign
+ grammars, with their interminable repetitions of questions which never
+ have occurred and are never likely to occur in any conversation among
+ human beings. We rode through a snow-storm for two or three days, and
+ arrived at "Honey Lake Smith's," a sort of isolated inn on the Carson
+ river. It was a two-story log house situated on a small knoll in the midst
+ of the vast basin or desert through which the sickly Carson winds its
+ melancholy way. Close to the house were the Overland stage stables, built
+ of sun-dried bricks. There was not another building within several leagues
+ of the place. Towards sunset about twenty hay-wagons arrived and camped
+ around the house and all the teamsters came in to supper&mdash;a very,
+ very rough set. There were one or two Overland stage drivers there, also,
+ and half a dozen vagabonds and stragglers; consequently the house was well
+ crowded.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We walked out, after supper, and visited a small Indian camp in the
+ vicinity. The Indians were in a great hurry about something, and were
+ packing up and getting away as fast as they could. In their broken English
+ they said, "By'm-by, heap water!" and by the help of signs made us
+ understand that in their opinion a flood was coming. The weather was
+ perfectly clear, and this was not the rainy season. There was about a foot
+ of water in the insignificant river&mdash;or maybe two feet; the stream
+ was not wider than a back alley in a village, and its banks were scarcely
+ higher than a man's head.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So, where was the flood to come from? We canvassed the subject awhile and
+ then concluded it was a ruse, and that the Indians had some better reason
+ for leaving in a hurry than fears of a flood in such an exceedingly dry
+ time.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link218" id="link218"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="218.jpg (37K)" src="images/218.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At seven in the evening we went to bed in the second story&mdash;with our
+ clothes on, as usual, and all three in the same bed, for every available
+ space on the floors, chairs, etc., was in request, and even then there was
+ barely room for the housing of the inn's guests. An hour later we were
+ awakened by a great turmoil, and springing out of bed we picked our way
+ nimbly among the ranks of snoring teamsters on the floor and got to the
+ front windows of the long room. A glance revealed a strange spectacle,
+ under the moonlight. The crooked Carson was full to the brim, and its
+ waters were raging and foaming in the wildest way&mdash;sweeping around
+ the sharp bends at a furious speed, and bearing on their surface a chaos
+ of logs, brush and all sorts of rubbish. A depression, where its bed had
+ once been, in other times, was already filling, and in one or two places
+ the water was beginning to wash over the main bank. Men were flying hither
+ and thither, bringing cattle and wagons close up to the house, for the
+ spot of high ground on which it stood extended only some thirty feet in
+ front and about a hundred in the rear. Close to the old river bed just
+ spoken of, stood a little log stable, and in this our horses were lodged.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link219" id="link219"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="219.jpg (173K)" src="images/219.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ While we looked, the waters increased so fast in this place that in a few
+ minutes a torrent was roaring by the little stable and its margin
+ encroaching steadily on the logs. We suddenly realized that this flood was
+ not a mere holiday spectacle, but meant damage&mdash;and not only to the
+ small log stable but to the Overland buildings close to the main river,
+ for the waves had now come ashore and were creeping about the foundations
+ and invading the great hay-corral adjoining. We ran down and joined the
+ crowd of excited men and frightened animals. We waded knee-deep into the
+ log stable, unfastened the horses and waded out almost waist-deep, so fast
+ the waters increased. Then the crowd rushed in a body to the hay- corral
+ and began to tumble down the huge stacks of baled hay and roll the bales
+ up on the high ground by the house. Meantime it was discovered that Owens,
+ an overland driver, was missing, and a man ran to the large stable, and
+ wading in, boot-top deep, discovered him asleep in his bed, awoke him, and
+ waded out again. But Owens was drowsy and resumed his nap; but only for a
+ minute or two, for presently he turned in his bed, his hand dropped over
+ the side and came in contact with the cold water! It was up level with the
+ mattress! He waded out, breast-deep, almost, and the next moment the
+ sun-burned bricks melted down like sugar and the big building crumbled to
+ a ruin and was washed away in a twinkling.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At eleven o'clock only the roof of the little log stable was out of water,
+ and our inn was on an island in mid-ocean. As far as the eye could reach,
+ in the moonlight, there was no desert visible, but only a level waste of
+ shining water. The Indians were true prophets, but how did they get their
+ information? I am not able to answer the question. We remained cooped up
+ eight days and nights with that curious crew. Swearing, drinking and card
+ playing were the order of the day, and occasionally a fight was thrown in
+ for variety. Dirt and vermin&mdash;but let us forget those features; their
+ profusion is simply inconceivable&mdash;it is better that they remain so.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There were two men&mdash;&mdash;however, this chapter is long enough.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /> <br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> <a name="linkch31" id="linkch31"></a>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXXI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There were two men in the company who caused me particular discomfort. One
+ was a little Swede, about twenty-five years old, who knew only one song,
+ and he was forever singing it. By day we were all crowded into one small,
+ stifling bar-room, and so there was no escaping this person's music.
+ Through all the profanity, whisky-guzzling, "old sledge" and quarreling,
+ his monotonous song meandered with never a variation in its tiresome
+ sameness, and it seemed to me, at last, that I would be content to die, in
+ order to be rid of the torture. The other man was a stalwart ruffian
+ called "Arkansas," who carried two revolvers in his belt and a bowie knife
+ projecting from his boot, and who was always drunk and always suffering
+ for a fight. But he was so feared, that nobody would accommodate him. He
+ would try all manner of little wary ruses to entrap somebody into an
+ offensive remark, and his face would light up now and then when he fancied
+ he was fairly on the scent of a fight, but invariably his victim would
+ elude his toils and then he would show a disappointment that was almost
+ pathetic. The landlord, Johnson, was a meek, well-meaning fellow, and
+ Arkansas fastened on him early, as a promising subject, and gave him no
+ rest day or night, for awhile. On the fourth morning, Arkansas got drunk
+ and sat himself down to wait for an opportunity. Presently Johnson came
+ in, just comfortably sociable with whisky, and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I reckon the Pennsylvania 'lection&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Arkansas raised his finger impressively and Johnson stopped. Arkansas rose
+ unsteadily and confronted him. Said he:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Wha-what do you know a&mdash;about Pennsylvania? Answer me that. Wha&mdash;what
+ do you know 'bout Pennsylvania?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I was only goin' to say&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You was only goin' to say. You was! You was only goin' to say&mdash;what
+ was you goin' to say? That's it! That's what I want to know. I want to
+ know wha&mdash;what you ('ic) what you know about Pennsylvania, since
+ you're makin' yourself so d&mdash;-d free. Answer me that!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Mr. Arkansas, if you'd only let me&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link222" id="link222"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="222.jpg (55K)" src="images/222.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Who's a henderin' you? Don't you insinuate nothing agin me!&mdash;don't
+ you do it. Don't you come in here bullyin' around, and cussin' and goin'
+ on like a lunatic&mdash;don't you do it. 'Coz I won't stand it. If fight's
+ what you want, out with it! I'm your man! Out with it!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Said Johnson, backing into a corner, Arkansas following, menacingly:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why, I never said nothing, Mr. Arkansas. You don't give a man no chance.
+ I was only goin' to say that Pennsylvania was goin' to have an election
+ next week&mdash;that was all&mdash;that was everything I was goin' to say&mdash;I
+ wish I may never stir if it wasn't."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well then why d'n't you say it? What did you come swellin' around that
+ way for, and tryin' to raise trouble?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why I didn't come swellin' around, Mr. Arkansas&mdash;I just&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I'm a liar am I! Ger-reat Caesar's ghost&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh, please, Mr. Arkansas, I never meant such a thing as that, I wish I
+ may die if I did. All the boys will tell you that I've always spoke well
+ of you, and respected you more'n any man in the house. Ask Smith. Ain't it
+ so, Smith? Didn't I say, no longer ago than last night, that for a man
+ that was a gentleman all the time and every way you took him, give me
+ Arkansas? I'll leave it to any gentleman here if them warn't the very
+ words I used. Come, now, Mr. Arkansas, le's take a drink&mdash;le's shake
+ hands and take a drink. Come up&mdash;everybody! It's my treat. Come up,
+ Bill, Tom, Bob, Scotty&mdash;come up. I want you all to take a drink with
+ me and Arkansas&mdash;old Arkansas, I call him&mdash;bully old Arkansas.
+ Gimme your hand agin. Look at him, boys&mdash;just take a look at him.
+ Thar stands the whitest man in America!&mdash;and the man that denies it
+ has got to fight me, that's all. Gimme that old flipper agin!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ They embraced, with drunken affection on the landlord's part and
+ unresponsive toleration on the part of Arkansas, who, bribed by a drink,
+ was disappointed of his prey once more. But the foolish landlord was so
+ happy to have escaped butchery, that he went on talking when he ought to
+ have marched himself out of danger. The consequence was that Arkansas
+ shortly began to glower upon him dangerously, and presently said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Lan'lord, will you p-please make that remark over agin if you please?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I was a-sayin' to Scotty that my father was up'ards of eighty year old
+ when he died."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Was that all that you said?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Yes, that was all."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Didn't say nothing but that?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No&mdash;nothing."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then an uncomfortable silence.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Arkansas played with his glass a moment, lolling on his elbows on the
+ counter. Then he meditatively scratched his left shin with his right boot,
+ while the awkward silence continued. But presently he loafed away toward
+ the stove, looking dissatisfied; roughly shouldered two or three men out
+ of a comfortable position; occupied it himself, gave a sleeping dog a kick
+ that sent him howling under a bench, then spread his long legs and his
+ blanket-coat tails apart and proceeded to warm his back. In a little while
+ he fell to grumbling to himself, and soon he slouched back to the bar and
+ said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Lan'lord, what's your idea for rakin' up old personalities and blowin'
+ about your father? Ain't this company agreeable to you? Ain't it? If this
+ company ain't agreeable to you, p'r'aps we'd better leave. Is that your
+ idea? Is that what you're coming at?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why bless your soul, Arkansas, I warn't thinking of such a thing. My
+ father and my mother&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Lan'lord, don't crowd a man! Don't do it. If nothing'll do you but a
+ disturbance, out with it like a man ('ic)&mdash;but don't rake up old
+ bygones and fling'em in the teeth of a passel of people that wants to be
+ peaceable if they could git a chance. What's the matter with you this
+ mornin', anyway? I never see a man carry on so."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Arkansas, I reely didn't mean no harm, and I won't go on with it if it's
+ onpleasant to you. I reckon my licker's got into my head, and what with
+ the flood, and havin' so many to feed and look out for&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "So that's what's a-ranklin' in your heart, is it? You want us to leave do
+ you? There's too many on us. You want us to pack up and swim. Is that it?
+ Come!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Please be reasonable, Arkansas. Now you know that I ain't the man to&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Are you a threatenin' me? Are you? By George, the man don't live that can
+ skeer me! Don't you try to come that game, my chicken&mdash;'cuz I can
+ stand a good deal, but I won't stand that. Come out from behind that bar
+ till I clean you! You want to drive us out, do you, you sneakin'
+ underhanded hound! Come out from behind that bar! I'll learn you to bully
+ and badger and browbeat a gentleman that's forever trying to befriend you
+ and keep you out of trouble!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Please, Arkansas, please don't shoot! If there's got to be bloodshed&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Do you hear that, gentlemen? Do you hear him talk about bloodshed? So
+ it's blood you want, is it, you ravin' desperado! You'd made up your mind
+ to murder somebody this mornin'&mdash;I knowed it perfectly well. I'm the
+ man, am I? It's me you're goin' to murder, is it? But you can't do it
+ 'thout I get one chance first, you thievin' black-hearted, white- livered
+ son of a nigger! Draw your weepon!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ With that, Arkansas began to shoot, and the landlord to clamber over
+ benches, men and every sort of obstacle in a frantic desire to escape. In
+ the midst of the wild hubbub the landlord crashed through a glass door,
+ and as Arkansas charged after him the landlord's wife suddenly appeared in
+ the doorway and confronted the desperado with a pair of scissors! Her fury
+ was magnificent. With head erect and flashing eye she stood a moment and
+ then advanced, with her weapon raised. The astonished ruffian hesitated,
+ and then fell back a step. She followed. She backed him step by step into
+ the middle of the bar-room, and then, while the wondering crowd closed up
+ and gazed, she gave him such another tongue-lashing as never a cowed and
+ shamefaced braggart got before, perhaps! As she finished and retired
+ victorious, a roar of applause shook the house, and every man ordered
+ "drinks for the crowd" in one and the same breath.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link225" id="link225"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="225.jpg (102K)" src="images/225.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The lesson was entirely sufficient. The reign of terror was over, and the
+ Arkansas domination broken for good. During the rest of the season of
+ island captivity, there was one man who sat apart in a state of permanent
+ humiliation, never mixing in any quarrel or uttering a boast, and never
+ resenting the insults the once cringing crew now constantly leveled at
+ him, and that man was "Arkansas."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By the fifth or sixth morning the waters had subsided from the land, but
+ the stream in the old river bed was still high and swift and there was no
+ possibility of crossing it. On the eighth it was still too high for an
+ entirely safe passage, but life in the inn had become next to
+ insupportable by reason of the dirt, drunkenness, fighting, etc., and so
+ we made an effort to get away. In the midst of a heavy snow-storm we
+ embarked in a canoe, taking our saddles aboard and towing our horses after
+ us by their halters. The Prussian, Ollendorff, was in the bow, with a
+ paddle, Ballou paddled in the middle, and I sat in the stern holding the
+ halters. When the horses lost their footing and began to swim, Ollendorff
+ got frightened, for there was great danger that the horses would make our
+ aim uncertain, and it was plain that if we failed to land at a certain
+ spot the current would throw us off and almost surely cast us into the
+ main Carson, which was a boiling torrent, now. Such a catastrophe would be
+ death, in all probability, for we would be swept to sea in the "Sink" or
+ overturned and drowned. We warned Ollendorff to keep his wits about him
+ and handle himself carefully, but it was useless; the moment the bow
+ touched the bank, he made a spring and the canoe whirled upside down in
+ ten-foot water.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link227" id="link227"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="227.jpg (95K)" src="images/227.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Ollendorff seized some brush and dragged himself ashore, but Ballou and I
+ had to swim for it, encumbered with our overcoats. But we held on to the
+ canoe, and although we were washed down nearly to the Carson, we managed
+ to push the boat ashore and make a safe landing. We were cold and water-
+ soaked, but safe. The horses made a landing, too, but our saddles were
+ gone, of course. We tied the animals in the sage-brush and there they had
+ to stay for twenty-four hours. We baled out the canoe and ferried over
+ some food and blankets for them, but we slept one more night in the inn
+ before making another venture on our journey.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The next morning it was still snowing furiously when we got away with our
+ new stock of saddles and accoutrements. We mounted and started. The snow
+ lay so deep on the ground that there was no sign of a road perceptible,
+ and the snow-fall was so thick that we could not see more than a hundred
+ yards ahead, else we could have guided our course by the mountain ranges.
+ The case looked dubious, but Ollendorff said his instinct was as sensitive
+ as any compass, and that he could "strike a bee-line" for Carson city and
+ never diverge from it. He said that if he were to straggle a single point
+ out of the true line his instinct would assail him like an outraged
+ conscience. Consequently we dropped into his wake happy and content. For
+ half an hour we poked along warily enough, but at the end of that time we
+ came upon a fresh trail, and Ollendorff shouted proudly:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I knew I was as dead certain as a compass, boys! Here we are, right in
+ somebody's tracks that will hunt the way for us without any trouble. Let's
+ hurry up and join company with the party."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So we put the horses into as much of a trot as the deep snow would allow,
+ and before long it was evident that we were gaining on our predecessors,
+ for the tracks grew more distinct. We hurried along, and at the end of an
+ hour the tracks looked still newer and fresher&mdash;but what surprised us
+ was, that the number of travelers in advance of us seemed to steadily
+ increase. We wondered how so large a party came to be traveling at such a
+ time and in such a solitude. Somebody suggested that it must be a company
+ of soldiers from the fort, and so we accepted that solution and jogged
+ along a little faster still, for they could not be far off now. But the
+ tracks still multiplied, and we began to think the platoon of soldiers was
+ miraculously expanding into a regiment&mdash;Ballou said they had already
+ increased to five hundred! Presently he stopped his horse and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Boys, these are our own tracks, and we've actually been circussing round
+ and round in a circle for more than two hours, out here in this blind
+ desert! By George this is perfectly hydraulic!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link229" id="link229"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="229.jpg (83K)" src="images/229.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then the old man waxed wroth and abusive. He called Ollendorff all manner
+ of hard names&mdash;said he never saw such a lurid fool as he was, and
+ ended with the peculiarly venomous opinion that he "did not know as much
+ as a logarythm!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We certainly had been following our own tracks. Ollendorff and his "mental
+ compass" were in disgrace from that moment.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After all our hard travel, here we were on the bank of the stream again,
+ with the inn beyond dimly outlined through the driving snow-fall. While we
+ were considering what to do, the young Swede landed from the canoe and
+ took his pedestrian way Carson-wards, singing his same tiresome song about
+ his "sister and his brother" and "the child in the grave with its mother,"
+ and in a short minute faded and disappeared in the white oblivion. He was
+ never heard of again. He no doubt got bewildered and lost, and Fatigue
+ delivered him over to Sleep and Sleep betrayed him to Death. Possibly he
+ followed our treacherous tracks till he became exhausted and dropped.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link230" id="link230"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="230.jpg (20K)" src="images/230.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Presently the Overland stage forded the now fast receding stream and
+ started toward Carson on its first trip since the flood came. We hesitated
+ no longer, now, but took up our march in its wake, and trotted merrily
+ along, for we had good confidence in the driver's bump of locality. But
+ our horses were no match for the fresh stage team. We were soon left out
+ of sight; but it was no matter, for we had the deep ruts the wheels made
+ for a guide. By this time it was three in the afternoon, and consequently
+ it was not very long before night came&mdash;and not with a lingering
+ twilight, but with a sudden shutting down like a cellar door, as is its
+ habit in that country. The snowfall was still as thick as ever, and of
+ course we could not see fifteen steps before us; but all about us the
+ white glare of the snow-bed enabled us to discern the smooth sugar-loaf
+ mounds made by the covered sage-bushes, and just in front of us the two
+ faint grooves which we knew were the steadily filling and slowly
+ disappearing wheel-tracks.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Now those sage-bushes were all about the same height&mdash;three or four
+ feet; they stood just about seven feet apart, all over the vast desert;
+ each of them was a mere snow-mound, now; in any direction that you
+ proceeded (the same as in a well laid out orchard) you would find yourself
+ moving down a distinctly defined avenue, with a row of these snow-mounds
+ an either side of it&mdash;an avenue the customary width of a road, nice
+ and level in its breadth, and rising at the sides in the most natural way,
+ by reason of the mounds. But we had not thought of this. Then imagine the
+ chilly thrill that shot through us when it finally occurred to us, far in
+ the night, that since the last faint trace of the wheel-tracks had long
+ ago been buried from sight, we might now be wandering down a mere
+ sage-brush avenue, miles away from the road and diverging further and
+ further away from it all the time. Having a cake of ice slipped down one's
+ back is placid comfort compared to it. There was a sudden leap and stir of
+ blood that had been asleep for an hour, and as sudden a rousing of all the
+ drowsing activities in our minds and bodies. We were alive and awake at
+ once&mdash;and shaking and quaking with consternation, too. There was an
+ instant halting and dismounting, a bending low and an anxious scanning of
+ the road-bed. Useless, of course; for if a faint depression could not be
+ discerned from an altitude of four or five feet above it, it certainly
+ could not with one's nose nearly against it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link231" id="link231"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="231.jpg (33K)" src="images/231.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch32" id="linkch32"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXXII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We seemed to be in a road, but that was no proof. We tested this by
+ walking off in various directions&mdash;the regular snow-mounds and the
+ regular avenues between them convinced each man that he had found the true
+ road, and that the others had found only false ones. Plainly the situation
+ was desperate. We were cold and stiff and the horses were tired. We
+ decided to build a sage-brush fire and camp out till morning. This was
+ wise, because if we were wandering from the right road and the snow-storm
+ continued another day our case would be the next thing to hopeless if we
+ kept on.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ All agreed that a camp fire was what would come nearest to saving us, now,
+ and so we set about building it. We could find no matches, and so we tried
+ to make shift with the pistols. Not a man in the party had ever tried to
+ do such a thing before, but not a man in the party doubted that it could
+ be done, and without any trouble&mdash;because every man in the party had
+ read about it in books many a time and had naturally come to believe it,
+ with trusting simplicity, just as he had long ago accepted and believed
+ that other common book-fraud about Indians and lost hunters making a fire
+ by rubbing two dry sticks together.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We huddled together on our knees in the deep snow, and the horses put
+ their noses together and bowed their patient heads over us; and while the
+ feathery flakes eddied down and turned us into a group of white statuary,
+ we proceeded with the momentous experiment. We broke twigs from a sage
+ bush and piled them on a little cleared place in the shelter of our
+ bodies. In the course of ten or fifteen minutes all was ready, and then,
+ while conversation ceased and our pulses beat low with anxious suspense,
+ Ollendorff applied his revolver, pulled the trigger and blew the pile
+ clear out of the county! It was the flattest failure that ever was.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link233" id="link233"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="233.jpg (89K)" src="images/233.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This was distressing, but it paled before a greater horror&mdash;the
+ horses were gone! I had been appointed to hold the bridles, but in my
+ absorbing anxiety over the pistol experiment I had unconsciously dropped
+ them and the released animals had walked off in the storm. It was useless
+ to try to follow them, for their footfalls could make no sound, and one
+ could pass within two yards of the creatures and never see them. We gave
+ them up without an effort at recovering them, and cursed the lying books
+ that said horses would stay by their masters for protection and
+ companionship in a distressful time like ours.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We were miserable enough, before; we felt still more forlorn, now.
+ Patiently, but with blighted hope, we broke more sticks and piled them,
+ and once more the Prussian shot them into annihilation. Plainly, to light
+ a fire with a pistol was an art requiring practice and experience, and the
+ middle of a desert at midnight in a snow-storm was not a good place or
+ time for the acquiring of the accomplishment. We gave it up and tried the
+ other. Each man took a couple of sticks and fell to chafing them together.
+ At the end of half an hour we were thoroughly chilled, and so were the
+ sticks. We bitterly execrated the Indians, the hunters and the books that
+ had betrayed us with the silly device, and wondered dismally what was next
+ to be done. At this critical moment Mr. Ballou fished out four matches
+ from the rubbish of an overlooked pocket. To have found four gold bars
+ would have seemed poor and cheap good luck compared to this.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One cannot think how good a match looks under such circumstances&mdash;or
+ how lovable and precious, and sacredly beautiful to the eye. This time we
+ gathered sticks with high hopes; and when Mr. Ballou prepared to light the
+ first match, there was an amount of interest centred upon him that pages
+ of writing could not describe. The match burned hopefully a moment, and
+ then went out. It could not have carried more regret with it if it had
+ been a human life. The next match simply flashed and died. The wind puffed
+ the third one out just as it was on the imminent verge of success. We
+ gathered together closer than ever, and developed a solicitude that was
+ rapt and painful, as Mr. Ballou scratched our last hope on his leg. It
+ lit, burned blue and sickly, and then budded into a robust flame. Shading
+ it with his hands, the old gentleman bent gradually down and every heart
+ went with him&mdash;everybody, too, for that matter&mdash;and blood and
+ breath stood still. The flame touched the sticks at last, took gradual
+ hold upon them&mdash;hesitated&mdash;took a stronger hold&mdash;hesitated
+ again&mdash;held its breath five heart-breaking seconds, then gave a sort
+ of human gasp and went out.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link234" id="link234"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="234.jpg (42K)" src="images/234.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Nobody said a word for several minutes. It was a solemn sort of silence;
+ even the wind put on a stealthy, sinister quiet, and made no more noise
+ than the falling flakes of snow. Finally a sad-voiced conversation began,
+ and it was soon apparent that in each of our hearts lay the conviction
+ that this was our last night with the living. I had so hoped that I was
+ the only one who felt so. When the others calmly acknowledged their
+ conviction, it sounded like the summons itself. Ollendorff said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Brothers, let us die together. And let us go without one hard feeling
+ towards each other. Let us forget and forgive bygones. I know that you
+ have felt hard towards me for turning over the canoe, and for knowing too
+ much and leading you round and round in the snow&mdash;but I meant well;
+ forgive me. I acknowledge freely that I have had hard feelings against Mr.
+ Ballou for abusing me and calling me a logarythm, which is a thing I do
+ not know what, but no doubt a thing considered disgraceful and unbecoming
+ in America, and it has scarcely been out of my mind and has hurt me a
+ great deal&mdash;but let it go; I forgive Mr. Ballou with all my heart,
+ and&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Poor Ollendorff broke down and the tears came. He was not alone, for I was
+ crying too, and so was Mr. Ballou. Ollendorff got his voice again and
+ forgave me for things I had done and said. Then he got out his bottle of
+ whisky and said that whether he lived or died he would never touch another
+ drop. He said he had given up all hope of life, and although ill-prepared,
+ was ready to submit humbly to his fate; that he wished he could be spared
+ a little longer, not for any selfish reason, but to make a thorough reform
+ in his character, and by devoting himself to helping the poor, nursing the
+ sick, and pleading with the people to guard themselves against the evils
+ of intemperance, make his life a beneficent example to the young, and lay
+ it down at last with the precious reflection that it had not been lived in
+ vain. He ended by saying that his reform should begin at this moment, even
+ here in the presence of death, since no longer time was to be vouchsafed
+ wherein to prosecute it to men's help and benefit&mdash;and with that he
+ threw away the bottle of whisky.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link236" id="link236"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="236.jpg (21K)" src="images/236.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Mr. Ballou made remarks of similar purport, and began the reform he could
+ not live to continue, by throwing away the ancient pack of cards that had
+ solaced our captivity during the flood and made it bearable.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He said he never gambled, but still was satisfied that the meddling with
+ cards in any way was immoral and injurious, and no man could be wholly
+ pure and blemishless without eschewing them. "And therefore," continued
+ he, "in doing this act I already feel more in sympathy with that spiritual
+ saturnalia necessary to entire and obsolete reform." These rolling
+ syllables touched him as no intelligible eloquence could have done, and
+ the old man sobbed with a mournfulness not unmingled with satisfaction.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ My own remarks were of the same tenor as those of my comrades, and I know
+ that the feelings that prompted them were heartfelt and sincere. We were
+ all sincere, and all deeply moved and earnest, for we were in the presence
+ of death and without hope. I threw away my pipe, and in doing it felt that
+ at last I was free of a hated vice and one that had ridden me like a
+ tyrant all my days. While I yet talked, the thought of the good I might
+ have done in the world and the still greater good I might now do, with
+ these new incentives and higher and better aims to guide me if I could
+ only be spared a few years longer, overcame me and the tears came again.
+ We put our arms about each other's necks and awaited the warning
+ drowsiness that precedes death by freezing.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It came stealing over us presently, and then we bade each other a last
+ farewell. A delicious dreaminess wrought its web about my yielding senses,
+ while the snow-flakes wove a winding sheet about my conquered body.
+ Oblivion came. The battle of life was done.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link237" id="link237"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="237.jpg (34K)" src="images/237.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch33" id="linkch33"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXXIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I do not know how long I was in a state of forgetfulness, but it seemed an
+ age. A vague consciousness grew upon me by degrees, and then came a
+ gathering anguish of pain in my limbs and through all my body. I
+ shuddered. The thought flitted through my brain, "this is death&mdash;this
+ is the hereafter."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then came a white upheaval at my side, and a voice said, with bitterness:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Will some gentleman be so good as to kick me behind?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was Ballou&mdash;at least it was a towzled snow image in a sitting
+ posture, with Ballou's voice.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I rose up, and there in the gray dawn, not fifteen steps from us, were the
+ frame buildings of a stage station, and under a shed stood our still
+ saddled and bridled horses!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ An arched snow-drift broke up, now, and Ollendorff emerged from it, and
+ the three of us sat and stared at the houses without speaking a word. We
+ really had nothing to say. We were like the profane man who could not "do
+ the subject justice," the whole situation was so painfully ridiculous and
+ humiliating that words were tame and we did not know where to commence
+ anyhow.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The joy in our hearts at our deliverance was poisoned; well-nigh
+ dissipated, indeed. We presently began to grow pettish by degrees, and
+ sullen; and then, angry at each other, angry at ourselves, angry at
+ everything in general, we moodily dusted the snow from our clothing and in
+ unsociable single file plowed our way to the horses, unsaddled them, and
+ sought shelter in the station.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I have scarcely exaggerated a detail of this curious and absurd adventure.
+ It occurred almost exactly as I have stated it. We actually went into camp
+ in a snow-drift in a desert, at midnight in a storm, forlorn and hopeless,
+ within fifteen steps of a comfortable inn.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ For two hours we sat apart in the station and ruminated in disgust. The
+ mystery was gone, now, and it was plain enough why the horses had deserted
+ us. Without a doubt they were under that shed a quarter of a minute after
+ they had left us, and they must have overheard and enjoyed all our
+ confessions and lamentations.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After breakfast we felt better, and the zest of life soon came back. The
+ world looked bright again, and existence was as dear to us as ever.
+ Presently an uneasiness came over me&mdash;grew upon me&mdash;assailed me
+ without ceasing. Alas, my regeneration was not complete&mdash;I wanted to
+ smoke! I resisted with all my strength, but the flesh was weak. I wandered
+ away alone and wrestled with myself an hour. I recalled my promises of
+ reform and preached to myself persuasively, upbraidingly, exhaustively.
+ But it was all vain, I shortly found myself sneaking among the snow-drifts
+ hunting for my pipe. I discovered it after a considerable search, and
+ crept away to hide myself and enjoy it. I remained behind the barn a good
+ while, asking myself how I would feel if my braver, stronger, truer
+ comrades should catch me in my degradation. At last I lit the pipe, and no
+ human being can feel meaner and baser than I did then. I was ashamed of
+ being in my own pitiful company. Still dreading discovery, I felt that
+ perhaps the further side of the barn would be somewhat safer, and so I
+ turned the corner. As I turned the one corner, smoking, Ollendorff turned
+ the other with his bottle to his lips, and between us sat unconscious
+ Ballou deep in a game of "solitaire" with the old greasy cards!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link240" id="link240"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="240.jpg (102K)" src="images/240.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Absurdity could go no farther. We shook hands and agreed to say no more
+ about "reform" and "examples to the rising generation."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The station we were at was at the verge of the Twenty-six-Mile Desert. If
+ we had approached it half an hour earlier the night before, we must have
+ heard men shouting there and firing pistols; for they were expecting some
+ sheep drovers and their flocks and knew that they would infallibly get
+ lost and wander out of reach of help unless guided by sounds.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ While we remained at the station, three of the drovers arrived, nearly
+ exhausted with their wanderings, but two others of their party were never
+ heard of afterward.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We reached Carson in due time, and took a rest. This rest, together with
+ preparations for the journey to Esmeralda, kept us there a week, and the
+ delay gave us the opportunity to be present at the trial of the great
+ land-slide case of Hyde vs. Morgan&mdash;an episode which is famous in
+ Nevada to this day. After a word or two of necessary explanation, I will
+ set down the history of this singular affair just as it transpired.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch34" id="linkch34"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXXIV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The mountains are very high and steep about Carson, Eagle and Washoe
+ Valleys&mdash;very high and very steep, and so when the snow gets to
+ melting off fast in the Spring and the warm surface-earth begins to
+ moisten and soften, the disastrous land-slides commence. The reader cannot
+ know what a land-slide is, unless he has lived in that country and seen
+ the whole side of a mountain taken off some fine morning and deposited
+ down in the valley, leaving a vast, treeless, unsightly scar upon the
+ mountain's front to keep the circumstance fresh in his memory all the
+ years that he may go on living within seventy miles of that place.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ General Buncombe was shipped out to Nevada in the invoice of Territorial
+ officers, to be United States Attorney. He considered himself a lawyer of
+ parts, and he very much wanted an opportunity to manifest it&mdash;partly
+ for the pure gratification of it and partly because his salary was
+ Territorially meagre (which is a strong expression). Now the older
+ citizens of a new territory look down upon the rest of the world with a
+ calm, benevolent compassion, as long as it keeps out of the way&mdash;when
+ it gets in the way they snub it. Sometimes this latter takes the shape of
+ a practical joke.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One morning Dick Hyde rode furiously up to General Buncombe's door in
+ Carson city and rushed into his presence without stopping to tie his
+ horse. He seemed much excited. He told the General that he wanted him to
+ conduct a suit for him and would pay him five hundred dollars if he
+ achieved a victory. And then, with violent gestures and a world of
+ profanity, he poured out his grief. He said it was pretty well known that
+ for some years he had been farming (or ranching as the more customary term
+ is) in Washoe District, and making a successful thing of it, and
+ furthermore it was known that his ranch was situated just in the edge of
+ the valley, and that Tom Morgan owned a ranch immediately above it on the
+ mountain side.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link242" id="link242"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="242.jpg (114K)" src="images/242.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And now the trouble was, that one of those hated and dreaded land-slides
+ had come and slid Morgan's ranch, fences, cabins, cattle, barns and
+ everything down on top of his ranch and exactly covered up every single
+ vestige of his property, to a depth of about thirty-eight feet. Morgan was
+ in possession and refused to vacate the premises&mdash;said he was
+ occupying his own cabin and not interfering with anybody else's&mdash;and
+ said the cabin was standing on the same dirt and same ranch it had always
+ stood on, and he would like to see anybody make him vacate.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "And when I reminded him," said Hyde, weeping, "that it was on top of my
+ ranch and that he was trespassing, he had the infernal meanness to ask me
+ why didn't I stay on my ranch and hold possession when I see him a-coming!
+ Why didn't I stay on it, the blathering lunatic&mdash;by George, when I
+ heard that racket and looked up that hill it was just like the whole world
+ was a-ripping and a-tearing down that mountain side&mdash;splinters, and
+ cord-wood, thunder and lightning, hail and snow, odds and ends of hay
+ stacks, and awful clouds of dust!&mdash;trees going end over end in the
+ air, rocks as big as a house jumping 'bout a thousand feet high and
+ busting into ten million pieces, cattle turned inside out and a-coming
+ head on with their tails hanging out between their teeth!&mdash;and in the
+ midst of all that wrack and destruction sot that cussed Morgan on his
+ gate-post, a-wondering why I didn't stay and hold possession! Laws bless
+ me, I just took one glimpse, General, and lit out'n the county in three
+ jumps exactly.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "But what grinds me is that that Morgan hangs on there and won't move
+ off'n that ranch&mdash;says it's his'n and he's going to keep it&mdash;likes
+ it better'n he did when it was higher up the hill. Mad! Well, I've been so
+ mad for two days I couldn't find my way to town&mdash;been wandering
+ around in the brush in a starving condition&mdash;got anything here to
+ drink, General? But I'm here now, and I'm a-going to law. You hear me!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Never in all the world, perhaps, were a man's feelings so outraged as were
+ the General's. He said he had never heard of such high-handed conduct in
+ all his life as this Morgan's. And he said there was no use in going to
+ law&mdash;Morgan had no shadow of right to remain where he was&mdash;nobody
+ in the wide world would uphold him in it, and no lawyer would take his
+ case and no judge listen to it. Hyde said that right there was where he
+ was mistaken&mdash;everybody in town sustained Morgan; Hal Brayton, a very
+ smart lawyer, had taken his case; the courts being in vacation, it was to
+ be tried before a referee, and ex-Governor Roop had already been appointed
+ to that office and would open his court in a large public hall near the
+ hotel at two that afternoon.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The General was amazed. He said he had suspected before that the people of
+ that Territory were fools, and now he knew it. But he said rest easy, rest
+ easy and collect the witnesses, for the victory was just as certain as if
+ the conflict were already over. Hyde wiped away his tears and left.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At two in the afternoon referee Roop's Court opened and Roop appeared
+ throned among his sheriffs, the witnesses, and spectators, and wearing
+ upon his face a solemnity so awe-inspiring that some of his fellow-
+ conspirators had misgivings that maybe he had not comprehended, after all,
+ that this was merely a joke. An unearthly stillness prevailed, for at the
+ slightest noise the judge uttered sternly the command:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Order in the Court!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And the sheriffs promptly echoed it. Presently the General elbowed his way
+ through the crowd of spectators, with his arms full of law-books, and on
+ his ears fell an order from the judge which was the first respectful
+ recognition of his high official dignity that had ever saluted them, and
+ it trickled pleasantly through his whole system:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Way for the United States Attorney!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The witnesses were called&mdash;legislators, high government officers,
+ ranchmen, miners, Indians, Chinamen, negroes. Three fourths of them were
+ called by the defendant Morgan, but no matter, their testimony invariably
+ went in favor of the plaintiff Hyde. Each new witness only added new
+ testimony to the absurdity of a man's claiming to own another man's
+ property because his farm had slid down on top of it. Then the Morgan
+ lawyers made their speeches, and seemed to make singularly weak ones&mdash;they
+ did really nothing to help the Morgan cause. And now the General, with
+ exultation in his face, got up and made an impassioned effort; he pounded
+ the table, he banged the law-books, he shouted, and roared, and howled, he
+ quoted from everything and everybody, poetry, sarcasm, statistics,
+ history, pathos, bathos, blasphemy, and wound up with a grand war-whoop
+ for free speech, freedom of the press, free schools, the Glorious Bird of
+ America and the principles of eternal justice! [Applause.]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link244" id="link244"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="244.jpg (96K)" src="images/244.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When the General sat down, he did it with the conviction that if there was
+ anything in good strong testimony, a great speech and believing and
+ admiring countenances all around, Mr. Morgan's case was killed. Ex-
+ Governor Roop leant his head upon his hand for some minutes, thinking, and
+ the still audience waited for his decision. Then he got up and stood
+ erect, with bended head, and thought again. Then he walked the floor with
+ long, deliberate strides, his chin in his hand, and still the audience
+ waited. At last he returned to his throne, seated himself, and began
+ impressively:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gentlemen, I feel the great responsibility that rests upon me this day.
+ This is no ordinary case. On the contrary it is plain that it is the most
+ solemn and awful that ever man was called upon to decide. Gentlemen, I
+ have listened attentively to the evidence, and have perceived that the
+ weight of it, the overwhelming weight of it, is in favor of the plaintiff
+ Hyde. I have listened also to the remarks of counsel, with high interest&mdash;and
+ especially will I commend the masterly and irrefutable logic of the
+ distinguished gentleman who represents the plaintiff. But gentlemen, let
+ us beware how we allow mere human testimony, human ingenuity in argument
+ and human ideas of equity, to influence us at a moment so solemn as this.
+ Gentlemen, it ill becomes us, worms as we are, to meddle with the decrees
+ of Heaven. It is plain to me that Heaven, in its inscrutable wisdom, has
+ seen fit to move this defendant's ranch for a purpose. We are but
+ creatures, and we must submit. If Heaven has chosen to favor the defendant
+ Morgan in this marked and wonderful manner; and if Heaven, dissatisfied
+ with the position of the Morgan ranch upon the mountain side, has chosen
+ to remove it to a position more eligible and more advantageous for its
+ owner, it ill becomes us, insects as we are, to question the legality of
+ the act or inquire into the reasons that prompted it. No&mdash;Heaven
+ created the ranches and it is Heaven's prerogative to rearrange them, to
+ experiment with them around at its pleasure. It is for us to submit,
+ without repining.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link246" id="link246"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="246.jpg (92K)" src="images/246.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I warn you that this thing which has happened is a thing with which the
+ sacrilegious hands and brains and tongues of men must not meddle.
+ Gentlemen, it is the verdict of this court that the plaintiff, Richard
+ Hyde, has been deprived of his ranch by the visitation of God! And from
+ this decision there is no appeal."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Buncombe seized his cargo of law-books and plunged out of the court-room
+ frantic with indignation. He pronounced Roop to be a miraculous fool, an
+ inspired idiot. In all good faith he returned at night and remonstrated
+ with Roop upon his extravagant decision, and implored him to walk the
+ floor and think for half an hour, and see if he could not figure out some
+ sort of modification of the verdict. Roop yielded at last and got up to
+ walk. He walked two hours and a half, and at last his face lit up happily
+ and he told Buncombe it had occurred to him that the ranch underneath the
+ new Morgan ranch still belonged to Hyde, that his title to the ground was
+ just as good as it had ever been, and therefore he was of opinion that
+ Hyde had a right to dig it out from under there and&mdash;
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The General never waited to hear the end of it. He was always an impatient
+ and irascible man, that way. At the end of two months the fact that he had
+ been played upon with a joke had managed to bore itself, like another
+ Hoosac Tunnel, through the solid adamant of his understanding.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch35" id="linkch35"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXXV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When we finally left for Esmeralda, horseback, we had an addition to the
+ company in the person of Capt. John Nye, the Governor's brother. He had a
+ good memory, and a tongue hung in the middle. This is a combination which
+ gives immortality to conversation. Capt. John never suffered the talk to
+ flag or falter once during the hundred and twenty miles of the journey. In
+ addition to his conversational powers, he had one or two other endowments
+ of a marked character. One was a singular "handiness" about doing anything
+ and everything, from laying out a railroad or organizing a political
+ party, down to sewing on buttons, shoeing a horse, or setting a broken
+ leg, or a hen. Another was a spirit of accommodation that prompted him to
+ take the needs, difficulties and perplexities of anybody and everybody
+ upon his own shoulders at any and all times, and dispose of them with
+ admirable facility and alacrity&mdash;hence he always managed to find
+ vacant beds in crowded inns, and plenty to eat in the emptiest larders.
+ And finally, wherever he met a man, woman or child, in camp, inn or
+ desert, he either knew such parties personally or had been acquainted with
+ a relative of the same. Such another traveling comrade was never seen
+ before. I cannot forbear giving a specimen of the way in which he overcame
+ difficulties. On the second day out, we arrived, very tired and hungry, at
+ a poor little inn in the desert, and were told that the house was full, no
+ provisions on hand, and neither hay nor barley to spare for the horses&mdash;must
+ move on. The rest of us wanted to hurry on while it was yet light, but
+ Capt. John insisted on stopping awhile. We dismounted and entered. There
+ was no welcome for us on any face. Capt. John began his blandishments, and
+ within twenty minutes he had accomplished the following things, viz.:
+ found old acquaintances in three teamsters; discovered that he used to go
+ to school with the landlord's mother; recognized his wife as a lady whose
+ life he had saved once in California, by stopping her runaway horse;
+ mended a child's broken toy and won the favor of its mother, a guest of
+ the inn; helped the hostler bleed a horse, and prescribed for another
+ horse that had the "heaves"; treated the entire party three times at the
+ landlord's bar; produced a later paper than anybody had seen for a week
+ and sat himself down to read the news to a deeply interested audience. The
+ result, summed up, was as follows: The hostler found plenty of feed for
+ our horses; we had a trout supper, an exceedingly sociable time after it,
+ good beds to sleep in, and a surprising breakfast in the morning&mdash;and
+ when we left, we left lamented by all! Capt. John had some bad traits, but
+ he had some uncommonly valuable ones to offset them with.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link249" id="link249"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="249.jpg (53K)" src="images/249.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Esmeralda was in many respects another Humboldt, but in a little more
+ forward state. The claims we had been paying assessments on were entirely
+ worthless, and we threw them away. The principal one cropped out of the
+ top of a knoll that was fourteen feet high, and the inspired Board of
+ Directors were running a tunnel under that knoll to strike the ledge. The
+ tunnel would have to be seventy feet long, and would then strike the ledge
+ at the same dept that a shaft twelve feet deep would have reached! The
+ Board were living on the "assessments." [N.B.&mdash;This hint comes too
+ late for the enlightenment of New York silver miners; they have already
+ learned all about this neat trick by experience.] The Board had no desire
+ to strike the ledge, knowing that it was as barren of silver as a
+ curbstone. This reminiscence calls to mind Jim Townsend's tunnel. He had
+ paid assessments on a mine called the "Daley" till he was well-nigh
+ penniless. Finally an assessment was levied to run a tunnel two hundred
+ and fifty feet on the Daley, and Townsend went up on the hill to look into
+ matters.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He found the Daley cropping out of the apex of an exceedingly sharp-
+ pointed peak, and a couple of men up there "facing" the proposed tunnel.
+ Townsend made a calculation. Then he said to the men:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "So you have taken a contract to run a tunnel into this hill two hundred
+ and fifty feet to strike this ledge?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Yes, sir."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, do you know that you have got one of the most expensive and arduous
+ undertakings before you that was ever conceived by man?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why no&mdash;how is that?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Because this hill is only twenty-five feet through from side to side; and
+ so you have got to build two hundred and twenty-five feet of your tunnel
+ on trestle-work!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link250" id="link250"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="250.jpg (61K)" src="images/250.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The ways of silver mining Boards are exceedingly dark and sinuous.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We took up various claims, and commenced shafts and tunnels on them, but
+ never finished any of them. We had to do a certain amount of work on each
+ to "hold" it, else other parties could seize our property after the
+ expiration of ten days. We were always hunting up new claims and doing a
+ little work on them and then waiting for a buyer&mdash;who never came. We
+ never found any ore that would yield more than fifty dollars a ton; and as
+ the mills charged fifty dollars a ton for working ore and extracting the
+ silver, our pocket-money melted steadily away and none returned to take
+ its place. We lived in a little cabin and cooked for ourselves; and
+ altogether it was a hard life, though a hopeful one&mdash;for we never
+ ceased to expect fortune and a customer to burst upon us some day.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At last, when flour reached a dollar a pound, and money could not be
+ borrowed on the best security at less than eight per cent a month (I being
+ without the security, too), I abandoned mining and went to milling. That
+ is to say, I went to work as a common laborer in a quartz mill, at ten
+ dollars a week and board.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch36" id="linkch36"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXXVI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I had already learned how hard and long and dismal a task it is to burrow
+ down into the bowels of the earth and get out the coveted ore; and now I
+ learned that the burrowing was only half the work; and that to get the
+ silver out of the ore was the dreary and laborious other half of it. We
+ had to turn out at six in the morning and keep at it till dark. This mill
+ was a six-stamp affair, driven by steam. Six tall, upright rods of iron,
+ as large as a man's ankle, and heavily shod with a mass of iron and steel
+ at their lower ends, were framed together like a gate, and these rose and
+ fell, one after the other, in a ponderous dance, in an iron box called a
+ "battery." Each of these rods or stamps weighed six hundred pounds. One of
+ us stood by the battery all day long, breaking up masses of silver-bearing
+ rock with a sledge and shoveling it into the battery. The ceaseless dance
+ of the stamps pulverized the rock to powder, and a stream of water that
+ trickled into the battery turned it to a creamy paste. The minutest
+ particles were driven through a fine wire screen which fitted close around
+ the battery, and were washed into great tubs warmed by super-heated steam&mdash;amalgamating
+ pans, they are called. The mass of pulp in the pans was kept constantly
+ stirred up by revolving "mullers." A quantity of quicksilver was kept
+ always in the battery, and this seized some of the liberated gold and
+ silver particles and held on to them; quicksilver was shaken in a fine
+ shower into the pans, also, about every half hour, through a buckskin
+ sack. Quantities of coarse salt and sulphate of copper were added, from
+ time to time to assist the amalgamation by destroying base metals which
+ coated the gold and silver and would not let it unite with the
+ quicksilver.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link253" id="link253"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="253.jpg (73K)" src="images/253.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ All these tiresome things we had to attend to constantly. Streams of dirty
+ water flowed always from the pans and were carried off in broad wooden
+ troughs to the ravine. One would not suppose that atoms of gold and silver
+ would float on top of six inches of water, but they did; and in order to
+ catch them, coarse blankets were laid in the troughs, and little
+ obstructing "riffles" charged with quicksilver were placed here and there
+ across the troughs also. These riffles had to be cleaned and the blankets
+ washed out every evening, to get their precious accumulations&mdash;and
+ after all this eternity of trouble one third of the silver and gold in a
+ ton of rock would find its way to the end of the troughs in the ravine at
+ last and have to be worked over again some day. There is nothing so
+ aggravating as silver milling. There never was any idle time in that mill.
+ There was always something to do. It is a pity that Adam could not have
+ gone straight out of Eden into a quartz mill, in order to understand the
+ full force of his doom to "earn his bread by the sweat of his brow." Every
+ now and then, during the day, we had to scoop some pulp out of the pans,
+ and tediously "wash" it in a horn spoon&mdash;wash it little by little
+ over the edge till at last nothing was left but some little dull globules
+ of quicksilver in the bottom. If they were soft and yielding, the pan
+ needed some salt or some sulphate of copper or some other chemical rubbish
+ to assist digestion; if they were crisp to the touch and would retain a
+ dint, they were freighted with all the silver and gold they could seize
+ and hold, and consequently the pan needed a fresh charge of quicksilver.
+ When there was nothing else to do, one could always "screen tailings."
+ That is to say, he could shovel up the dried sand that had washed down to
+ the ravine through the troughs and dash it against an upright wire screen
+ to free it from pebbles and prepare it for working over.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The process of amalgamation differed in the various mills, and this
+ included changes in style of pans and other machinery, and a great
+ diversity of opinion existed as to the best in use, but none of the
+ methods employed, involved the principle of milling ore without "screening
+ the tailings." Of all recreations in the world, screening tailings on a
+ hot day, with a long-handled shovel, is the most undesirable.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link254" id="link254"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="254.jpg (78K)" src="images/254.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At the end of the week the machinery was stopped and we "cleaned up." That
+ is to say, we got the pulp out of the pans and batteries, and washed the
+ mud patiently away till nothing was left but the long accumulating mass of
+ quicksilver, with its imprisoned treasures. This we made into heavy,
+ compact snow-balls, and piled them up in a bright, luxurious heap for
+ inspection. Making these snow-balls cost me a fine gold ring&mdash;that
+ and ignorance together; for the quicksilver invaded the ring with the same
+ facility with which water saturates a sponge&mdash;separated its particles
+ and the ring crumbled to pieces.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We put our pile of quicksilver balls into an iron retort that had a pipe
+ leading from it to a pail of water, and then applied a roasting heat. The
+ quicksilver turned to vapor, escaped through the pipe into the pail, and
+ the water turned it into good wholesome quicksilver again. Quicksilver is
+ very costly, and they never waste it. On opening the retort, there was our
+ week's work&mdash;a lump of pure white, frosty looking silver, twice as
+ large as a man's head. Perhaps a fifth of the mass was gold, but the color
+ of it did not show&mdash;would not have shown if two thirds of it had been
+ gold. We melted it up and made a solid brick of it by pouring it into an
+ iron brick-mould.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By such a tedious and laborious process were silver bricks obtained. This
+ mill was but one of many others in operation at the time. The first one in
+ Nevada was built at Egan Canyon and was a small insignificant affair and
+ compared most unfavorably with some of the immense establishments
+ afterwards located at Virginia City and elsewhere.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link256" id="link256"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="256.jpg (96K)" src="images/256.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ From our bricks a little corner was chipped off for the "fire-assay"&mdash;a
+ method used to determine the proportions of gold, silver and base metals
+ in the mass. This is an interesting process. The chip is hammered out as
+ thin as paper and weighed on scales so fine and sensitive that if you
+ weigh a two-inch scrap of paper on them and then write your name on the
+ paper with a course, soft pencil and weigh it again, the scales will take
+ marked notice of the addition.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then a little lead (also weighed) is rolled up with the flake of silver
+ and the two are melted at a great heat in a small vessel called a cupel,
+ made by compressing bone ashes into a cup-shape in a steel mold. The base
+ metals oxydize and are absorbed with the lead into the pores of the cupel.
+ A button or globule of perfectly pure gold and silver is left behind, and
+ by weighing it and noting the loss, the assayer knows the proportion of
+ base metal the brick contains. He has to separate the gold from the silver
+ now. The button is hammered out flat and thin, put in the furnace and kept
+ some time at a red heat; after cooling it off it is rolled up like a quill
+ and heated in a glass vessel containing nitric acid; the acid dissolves
+ the silver and leaves the gold pure and ready to be weighed on its own
+ merits. Then salt water is poured into the vessel containing the dissolved
+ silver and the silver returns to palpable form again and sinks to the
+ bottom. Nothing now remains but to weigh it; then the proportions of the
+ several metals contained in the brick are known, and the assayer stamps
+ the value of the brick upon its surface.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The sagacious reader will know now, without being told, that the
+ speculative miner, in getting a "fire-assay" made of a piece of rock from
+ his mine (to help him sell the same), was not in the habit of picking out
+ the least valuable fragment of rock on his dump-pile, but quite the
+ contrary. I have seen men hunt over a pile of nearly worthless quartz for
+ an hour, and at last find a little piece as large as a filbert, which was
+ rich in gold and silver&mdash;and this was reserved for a fire-assay! Of
+ course the fire-assay would demonstrate that a ton of such rock would
+ yield hundreds of dollars&mdash;and on such assays many an utterly
+ worthless mine was sold.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Assaying was a good business, and so some men engaged in it, occasionally,
+ who were not strictly scientific and capable. One assayer got such rich
+ results out of all specimens brought to him that in time he acquired
+ almost a monopoly of the business. But like all men who achieve success,
+ he became an object of envy and suspicion. The other assayers entered into
+ a conspiracy against him, and let some prominent citizens into the secret
+ in order to show that they meant fairly. Then they broke a little fragment
+ off a carpenter's grindstone and got a stranger to take it to the popular
+ scientist and get it assayed. In the course of an hour the result came&mdash;whereby
+ it appeared that a ton of that rock would yield $1,184.40 in silver and
+ $366.36 in gold!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link257" id="link257"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="257.jpg (34K)" src="images/257.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Due publication of the whole matter was made in the paper, and the popular
+ assayer left town "between two days."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I will remark, in passing, that I only remained in the milling business
+ one week. I told my employer I could not stay longer without an advance in
+ my wages; that I liked quartz milling, indeed was infatuated with it; that
+ I had never before grown so tenderly attached to an occupation in so short
+ a time; that nothing, it seemed to me, gave such scope to intellectual
+ activity as feeding a battery and screening tailings, and nothing so
+ stimulated the moral attributes as retorting bullion and washing blankets&mdash;still,
+ I felt constrained to ask an increase of salary. He said he was paying me
+ ten dollars a week, and thought it a good round sum. How much did I want?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I said about four hundred thousand dollars a month, and board, was about
+ all I could reasonably ask, considering the hard times.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I was ordered off the premises! And yet, when I look back to those days
+ and call to mind the exceeding hardness of the labor I performed in that
+ mill, I only regret that I did not ask him seven hundred thousand.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Shortly after this I began to grow crazy, along with the rest of the
+ population, about the mysterious and wonderful "cement mine," and to make
+ preparations to take advantage of any opportunity that might offer to go
+ and help hunt for it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch37" id="linkch37"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXXVII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was somewhere in the neighborhood of Mono Lake that the marvellous
+ Whiteman cement mine was supposed to lie. Every now and then it would be
+ reported that Mr. W. had passed stealthily through Esmeralda at dead of
+ night, in disguise, and then we would have a wild excitement&mdash;because
+ he must be steering for his secret mine, and now was the time to follow
+ him. In less than three hours after daylight all the horses and mules and
+ donkeys in the vicinity would be bought, hired or stolen, and half the
+ community would be off for the mountains, following in the wake of
+ Whiteman. But W. would drift about through the mountain gorges for days
+ together, in a purposeless sort of way, until the provisions of the miners
+ ran out, and they would have to go back home. I have known it reported at
+ eleven at night, in a large mining camp, that Whiteman had just passed
+ through, and in two hours the streets, so quiet before, would be swarming
+ with men and animals. Every individual would be trying to be very secret,
+ but yet venturing to whisper to just one neighbor that W. had passed
+ through. And long before daylight&mdash;this in the dead of Winter&mdash;the
+ stampede would be complete, the camp deserted, and the whole population
+ gone chasing after W.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The tradition was that in the early immigration, more than twenty years
+ ago, three young Germans, brothers, who had survived an Indian massacre on
+ the Plains, wandered on foot through the deserts, avoiding all trails and
+ roads, and simply holding a westerly direction and hoping to find
+ California before they starved, or died of fatigue. And in a gorge in the
+ mountains they sat down to rest one day, when one of them noticed a
+ curious vein of cement running along the ground, shot full of lumps of
+ dull yellow metal. They saw that it was gold, and that here was a fortune
+ to be acquired in a single day. The vein was about as wide as a curbstone,
+ and fully two thirds of it was pure gold. Every pound of the wonderful
+ cement was worth well-nigh $200.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link260" id="link260"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="260.jpg (59K)" src="images/260.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Each of the brothers loaded himself with about twenty-five pounds of it,
+ and then they covered up all traces of the vein, made a rude drawing of
+ the locality and the principal landmarks in the vicinity, and started
+ westward again. But troubles thickened about them. In their wanderings one
+ brother fell and broke his leg, and the others were obliged to go on and
+ leave him to die in the wilderness. Another, worn out and starving, gave
+ up by and by, and laid down to die, but after two or three weeks of
+ incredible hardships, the third reached the settlements of California
+ exhausted, sick, and his mind deranged by his sufferings. He had thrown
+ away all his cement but a few fragments, but these were sufficient to set
+ everybody wild with excitement. However, he had had enough of the cement
+ country, and nothing could induce him to lead a party thither. He was
+ entirely content to work on a farm for wages. But he gave Whiteman his
+ map, and described the cement region as well as he could and thus
+ transferred the curse to that gentleman&mdash;for when I had my one
+ accidental glimpse of Mr. W. in Esmeralda he had been hunting for the lost
+ mine, in hunger and thirst, poverty and sickness, for twelve or thirteen
+ years. Some people believed he had found it, but most people believed he
+ had not. I saw a piece of cement as large as my fist which was said to
+ have been given to Whiteman by the young German, and it was of a seductive
+ nature. Lumps of virgin gold were as thick in it as raisins in a slice of
+ fruit cake. The privilege of working such a mine one week would be
+ sufficient for a man of reasonable desires.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A new partner of ours, a Mr. Higbie, knew Whiteman well by sight, and a
+ friend of ours, a Mr. Van Dorn, was well acquainted with him, and not only
+ that, but had Whiteman's promise that he should have a private hint in
+ time to enable him to join the next cement expedition. Van Dorn had
+ promised to extend the hint to us. One evening Higbie came in greatly
+ excited, and said he felt certain he had recognized Whiteman, up town,
+ disguised and in a pretended state of intoxication. In a little while Van
+ Dorn arrived and confirmed the news; and so we gathered in our cabin and
+ with heads close together arranged our plans in impressive whispers.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We were to leave town quietly, after midnight, in two or three small
+ parties, so as not to attract attention, and meet at dawn on the "divide"
+ overlooking Mono Lake, eight or nine miles distant. We were to make no
+ noise after starting, and not speak above a whisper under any
+ circumstances. It was believed that for once Whiteman's presence was
+ unknown in the town and his expedition unsuspected. Our conclave broke up
+ at nine o'clock, and we set about our preparation diligently and with
+ profound secrecy. At eleven o'clock we saddled our horses, hitched them
+ with their long riatas (or lassos), and then brought out a side of bacon,
+ a sack of beans, a small sack of coffee, some sugar, a hundred pounds of
+ flour in sacks, some tin cups and a coffee pot, frying pan and some few
+ other necessary articles. All these things were "packed" on the back of a
+ led horse&mdash;and whoever has not been taught, by a Spanish adept, to
+ pack an animal, let him never hope to do the thing by natural smartness.
+ That is impossible. Higbie had had some experience, but was not perfect.
+ He put on the pack saddle (a thing like a saw-buck), piled the property on
+ it and then wound a rope all over and about it and under it, "every which
+ way," taking a hitch in it every now and then, and occasionally surging
+ back on it till the horse's sides sunk in and he gasped for breath&mdash;but
+ every time the lashings grew tight in one place they loosened in another.
+ We never did get the load tight all over, but we got it so that it would
+ do, after a fashion, and then we started, in single file, close order, and
+ without a word. It was a dark night. We kept the middle of the road, and
+ proceeded in a slow walk past the rows of cabins, and whenever a miner
+ came to his door I trembled for fear the light would shine on us an excite
+ curiosity. But nothing happened. We began the long winding ascent of the
+ canyon, toward the "divide," and presently the cabins began to grow
+ infrequent, and the intervals between them wider and wider, and then I
+ began to breathe tolerably freely and feel less like a thief and a
+ murderer. I was in the rear, leading the pack horse. As the ascent grew
+ steeper he grew proportionately less satisfied with his cargo, and began
+ to pull back on his riata occasionally and delay progress. My comrades
+ were passing out of sight in the gloom. I was getting anxious. I coaxed
+ and bullied the pack horse till I presently got him into a trot, and then
+ the tin cups and pans strung about his person frightened him and he ran.
+ His riata was wound around the pummel of my saddle, and so, as he went by
+ he dragged me from my horse and the two animals traveled briskly on
+ without me. But I was not alone&mdash;the loosened cargo tumbled overboard
+ from the pack horse and fell close to me. It was abreast of almost the
+ last cabin.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A miner came out and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Hello!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I was thirty steps from him, and knew he could not see me, it was so very
+ dark in the shadow of the mountain. So I lay still. Another head appeared
+ in the light of the cabin door, and presently the two men walked toward
+ me. They stopped within ten steps of me, and one said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Sh! Listen."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link263" id="link263"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="263.jpg (75K)" src="images/263.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I could not have been in a more distressed state if I had been escaping
+ justice with a price on my head. Then the miners appeared to sit down on a
+ boulder, though I could not see them distinctly enough to be very sure
+ what they did. One said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I heard a noise, as plain as I ever heard anything. It seemed to be about
+ there&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A stone whizzed by my head. I flattened myself out in the dust like a
+ postage stamp, and thought to myself if he mended his aim ever so little
+ he would probably hear another noise. In my heart, now, I execrated secret
+ expeditions. I promised myself that this should be my last, though the
+ Sierras were ribbed with cement veins. Then one of the men said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I'll tell you what! Welch knew what he was talking about when he said he
+ saw Whiteman to-day. I heard horses&mdash;that was the noise. I am going
+ down to Welch's, right away."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ They left and I was glad. I did not care whither they went, so they went.
+ I was willing they should visit Welch, and the sooner the better.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ As soon as they closed their cabin door my comrades emerged from the
+ gloom; they had caught the horses and were waiting for a clear coast
+ again. We remounted the cargo on the pack horse and got under way, and as
+ day broke we reached the "divide" and joined Van Dorn. Then we journeyed
+ down into the valley of the Lake, and feeling secure, we halted to cook
+ breakfast, for we were tired and sleepy and hungry. Three hours later the
+ rest of the population filed over the "divide" in a long procession, and
+ drifted off out of sight around the borders of the Lake!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Whether or not my accident had produced this result we never knew, but at
+ least one thing was certain&mdash;the secret was out and Whiteman would
+ not enter upon a search for the cement mine this time. We were filled with
+ chagrin.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We held a council and decided to make the best of our misfortune and enjoy
+ a week's holiday on the borders of the curious Lake. Mono, it is sometimes
+ called, and sometimes the "Dead Sea of California." It is one of the
+ strangest freaks of Nature to be found in any land, but it is hardly ever
+ mentioned in print and very seldom visited, because it lies away off the
+ usual routes of travel and besides is so difficult to get at that only men
+ content to endure the roughest life will consent to take upon themselves
+ the discomforts of such a trip. On the morning of our second day, we
+ traveled around to a remote and particularly wild spot on the borders of
+ the Lake, where a stream of fresh, ice-cold water entered it from the
+ mountain side, and then we went regularly into camp. We hired a large boat
+ and two shot-guns from a lonely ranchman who lived some ten miles further
+ on, and made ready for comfort and recreation. We soon got thoroughly
+ acquainted with the Lake and all its peculiarities.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch38" id="linkch38"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXXVIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Mono Lake lies in a lifeless, treeless, hideous desert, eight thousand
+ feet above the level of the sea, and is guarded by mountains two thousand
+ feet higher, whose summits are always clothed in clouds. This solemn,
+ silent, sail-less sea&mdash;this lonely tenant of the loneliest spot on
+ earth&mdash;is little graced with the picturesque. It is an unpretending
+ expanse of grayish water, about a hundred miles in circumference, with two
+ islands in its centre, mere upheavals of rent and scorched and blistered
+ lava, snowed over with gray banks and drifts of pumice-stone and ashes,
+ the winding sheet of the dead volcano, whose vast crater the lake has
+ seized upon and occupied.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link265" id="link265"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="265.jpg (138K)" src="images/265.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The lake is two hundred feet deep, and its sluggish waters are so strong
+ with alkali that if you only dip the most hopelessly soiled garment into
+ them once or twice, and wring it out, it will be found as clean as if it
+ had been through the ablest of washerwomen's hands. While we camped there
+ our laundry work was easy. We tied the week's washing astern of our boat,
+ and sailed a quarter of a mile, and the job was complete, all to the
+ wringing out. If we threw the water on our heads and gave them a rub or
+ so, the white lather would pile up three inches high. This water is not
+ good for bruised places and abrasions of the skin. We had a valuable dog.
+ He had raw places on him. He had more raw places on him than sound ones.
+ He was the rawest dog I almost ever saw. He jumped overboard one day to
+ get away from the flies. But it was bad judgment. In his condition, it
+ would have been just as comfortable to jump into the fire.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link266a" id="link266a"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="266a.jpg (44K)" src="images/266a.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The alkali water nipped him in all the raw places simultaneously, and he
+ struck out for the shore with considerable interest. He yelped and barked
+ and howled as he went&mdash;and by the time he got to the shore there was
+ no bark to him&mdash;for he had barked the bark all out of his inside, and
+ the alkali water had cleaned the bark all off his outside, and he probably
+ wished he had never embarked in any such enterprise. He ran round and
+ round in a circle, and pawed the earth and clawed the air, and threw
+ double somersaults, sometimes backward and sometimes forward, in the most
+ extraordinary manner. He was not a demonstrative dog, as a general thing,
+ but rather of a grave and serious turn of mind, and I never saw him take
+ so much interest in anything before. He finally struck out over the
+ mountains, at a gait which we estimated at about two hundred and fifty
+ miles an hour, and he is going yet. This was about nine years ago. We look
+ for what is left of him along here every day.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link266b" id="link266b"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="266b.jpg (51K)" src="images/266b.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A white man cannot drink the water of Mono Lake, for it is nearly pure
+ lye. It is said that the Indians in the vicinity drink it sometimes,
+ though. It is not improbable, for they are among the purest liars I ever
+ saw. [There will be no additional charge for this joke, except to parties
+ requiring an explanation of it. This joke has received high commendation
+ from some of the ablest minds of the age.]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There are no fish in Mono Lake&mdash;no frogs, no snakes, no polliwigs&mdash;nothing,
+ in fact, that goes to make life desirable. Millions of wild ducks and
+ sea-gulls swim about the surface, but no living thing exists under the
+ surface, except a white feathery sort of worm, one half an inch long,
+ which looks like a bit of white thread frayed out at the sides. If you dip
+ up a gallon of water, you will get about fifteen thousand of these. They
+ give to the water a sort of grayish-white appearance. Then there is a fly,
+ which looks something like our house fly. These settle on the beach to eat
+ the worms that wash ashore&mdash;and any time, you can see there a belt of
+ flies an inch deep and six feet wide, and this belt extends clear around
+ the lake&mdash;a belt of flies one hundred miles long. If you throw a
+ stone among them, they swarm up so thick that they look dense, like a
+ cloud. You can hold them under water as long as you please&mdash;they do
+ not mind it&mdash;they are only proud of it. When you let them go, they
+ pop up to the surface as dry as a patent office report, and walk off as
+ unconcernedly as if they had been educated especially with a view to
+ affording instructive entertainment to man in that particular way.
+ Providence leaves nothing to go by chance. All things have their uses and
+ their part and proper place in Nature's economy: the ducks eat the flies&mdash;the
+ flies eat the worms&mdash;the Indians eat all three&mdash;the wild cats
+ eat the Indians&mdash;the white folks eat the wild cats&mdash;and thus all
+ things are lovely.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Mono Lake is a hundred miles in a straight line from the ocean&mdash;and
+ between it and the ocean are one or two ranges of mountains&mdash;yet
+ thousands of sea-gulls go there every season to lay their eggs and rear
+ their young. One would as soon expect to find sea-gulls in Kansas. And in
+ this connection let us observe another instance of Nature's wisdom. The
+ islands in the lake being merely huge masses of lava, coated over with
+ ashes and pumice-stone, and utterly innocent of vegetation or anything
+ that would burn; and sea-gull's eggs being entirely useless to anybody
+ unless they be cooked, Nature has provided an unfailing spring of boiling
+ water on the largest island, and you can put your eggs in there, and in
+ four minutes you can boil them as hard as any statement I have made during
+ the past fifteen years. Within ten feet of the boiling spring is a spring
+ of pure cold water, sweet and wholesome.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So, in that island you get your board and washing free of charge&mdash;and
+ if nature had gone further and furnished a nice American hotel clerk who
+ was crusty and disobliging, and didn't know anything about the time
+ tables, or the railroad routes&mdash;or&mdash;anything&mdash;and was proud
+ of it&mdash;I would not wish for a more desirable boarding-house.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link268" id="link268"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="268.jpg (51K)" src="images/268.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Half a dozen little mountain brooks flow into Mono Lake, but not a stream
+ of any kind flows out of it. It neither rises nor falls, apparently, and
+ what it does with its surplus water is a dark and bloody mystery.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There are only two seasons in the region round about Mono Lake&mdash;and
+ these are, the breaking up of one Winter and the beginning of the next.
+ More than once (in Esmeralda) I have seen a perfectly blistering morning
+ open up with the thermometer at ninety degrees at eight o'clock, and seen
+ the snow fall fourteen inches deep and that same identical thermometer go
+ down to forty-four degrees under shelter, before nine o'clock at night.
+ Under favorable circumstances it snows at least once in every single month
+ in the year, in the little town of Mono. So uncertain is the climate in
+ Summer that a lady who goes out visiting cannot hope to be prepared for
+ all emergencies unless she takes her fan under one arm and her snow shoes
+ under the other. When they have a Fourth of July procession it generally
+ snows on them, and they do say that as a general thing when a man calls
+ for a brandy toddy there, the bar keeper chops it off with a hatchet and
+ wraps it up in a paper, like maple sugar. And it is further reported that
+ the old soakers haven't any teeth&mdash;wore them out eating gin cocktails
+ and brandy punches. I do not endorse that statement&mdash;I simply give it
+ for what it is worth&mdash;and it is worth&mdash;well, I should say,
+ millions, to any man who can believe it without straining himself. But I
+ do endorse the snow on the Fourth of July&mdash;because I know that to be
+ true.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch39" id="linkch39"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XXXIX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ About seven o'clock one blistering hot morning&mdash;for it was now dead
+ summer time&mdash;Higbie and I took the boat and started on a voyage of
+ discovery to the two islands. We had often longed to do this, but had been
+ deterred by the fear of storms; for they were frequent, and severe enough
+ to capsize an ordinary row-boat like ours without great difficulty&mdash;and
+ once capsized, death would ensue in spite of the bravest swimming, for
+ that venomous water would eat a man's eyes out like fire, and burn him out
+ inside, too, if he shipped a sea. It was called twelve miles, straight out
+ to the islands&mdash;a long pull and a warm one&mdash;but the morning was
+ so quiet and sunny, and the lake so smooth and glassy and dead, that we
+ could not resist the temptation. So we filled two large tin canteens with
+ water (since we were not acquainted with the locality of the spring said
+ to exist on the large island), and started. Higbie's brawny muscles gave
+ the boat good speed, but by the time we reached our destination we judged
+ that we had pulled nearer fifteen miles than twelve.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We landed on the big island and went ashore. We tried the water in the
+ canteens, now, and found that the sun had spoiled it; it was so brackish
+ that we could not drink it; so we poured it out and began a search for the
+ spring&mdash;for thirst augments fast as soon as it is apparent that one
+ has no means at hand of quenching it. The island was a long, moderately
+ high hill of ashes&mdash;nothing but gray ashes and pumice-stone, in which
+ we sunk to our knees at every step&mdash;and all around the top was a
+ forbidding wall of scorched and blasted rocks. When we reached the top and
+ got within the wall, we found simply a shallow, far-reaching basin,
+ carpeted with ashes, and here and there a patch of fine sand. In places,
+ picturesque jets of steam shot up out of crevices, giving evidence that
+ although this ancient crater had gone out of active business, there was
+ still some fire left in its furnaces. Close to one of these jets of steam
+ stood the only tree on the island&mdash;a small pine of most graceful
+ shape and most faultless symmetry; its color was a brilliant green, for
+ the steam drifted unceasingly through its branches and kept them always
+ moist. It contrasted strangely enough, did this vigorous and beautiful
+ outcast, with its dead and dismal surroundings. It was like a cheerful
+ spirit in a mourning household.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link271" id="link271"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="271.jpg (56K)" src="images/271.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We hunted for the spring everywhere, traversing the full length of the
+ island (two or three miles), and crossing it twice&mdash;climbing
+ ash-hills patiently, and then sliding down the other side in a sitting
+ posture, plowing up smothering volumes of gray dust. But we found nothing
+ but solitude, ashes and a heart-breaking silence. Finally we noticed that
+ the wind had risen, and we forgot our thirst in a solicitude of greater
+ importance; for, the lake being quiet, we had not taken pains about
+ securing the boat. We hurried back to a point overlooking our landing
+ place, and then&mdash;but mere words cannot describe our dismay&mdash;the
+ boat was gone! The chances were that there was not another boat on the
+ entire lake. The situation was not comfortable&mdash;in truth, to speak
+ plainly, it was frightful. We were prisoners on a desolate island, in
+ aggravating proximity to friends who were for the present helpless to aid
+ us; and what was still more uncomfortable was the reflection that we had
+ neither food nor water. But presently we sighted the boat. It was drifting
+ along, leisurely, about fifty yards from shore, tossing in a foamy sea. It
+ drifted, and continued to drift, but at the same safe distance from land,
+ and we walked along abreast it and waited for fortune to favor us. At the
+ end of an hour it approached a jutting cape, and Higbie ran ahead and
+ posted himself on the utmost verge and prepared for the assault. If we
+ failed there, there was no hope for us. It was driving gradually shoreward
+ all the time, now; but whether it was driving fast enough to make the
+ connection or not was the momentous question. When it got within thirty
+ steps of Higbie I was so excited that I fancied I could hear my own heart
+ beat. When, a little later, it dragged slowly along and seemed about to go
+ by, only one little yard out of reach, it seemed as if my heart stood
+ still; and when it was exactly abreast him and began to widen away, and he
+ still standing like a watching statue, I knew my heart did stop. But when
+ he gave a great spring, the next instant, and lit fairly in the stern, I
+ discharged a war-whoop that woke the solitudes!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link273" id="link273"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="273.jpg (62K)" src="images/273.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But it dulled my enthusiasm, presently, when he told me he had not been
+ caring whether the boat came within jumping distance or not, so that it
+ passed within eight or ten yards of him, for he had made up his mind to
+ shut his eyes and mouth and swim that trifling distance. Imbecile that I
+ was, I had not thought of that. It was only a long swim that could be
+ fatal.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The sea was running high and the storm increasing. It was growing late,
+ too&mdash;three or four in the afternoon. Whether to venture toward the
+ mainland or not, was a question of some moment. But we were so distressed
+ by thirst that we decide to try it, and so Higbie fell to work and I took
+ the steering-oar. When we had pulled a mile, laboriously, we were
+ evidently in serious peril, for the storm had greatly augmented; the
+ billows ran very high and were capped with foaming crests, the heavens
+ were hung with black, and the wind blew with great fury. We would have
+ gone back, now, but we did not dare to turn the boat around, because as
+ soon as she got in the trough of the sea she would upset, of course. Our
+ only hope lay in keeping her head-on to the seas. It was hard work to do
+ this, she plunged so, and so beat and belabored the billows with her
+ rising and falling bows. Now and then one of Higbie's oars would trip on
+ the top of a wave, and the other one would snatch the boat half around in
+ spite of my cumbersome steering apparatus. We were drenched by the sprays
+ constantly, and the boat occasionally shipped water. By and by, powerful
+ as my comrade was, his great exertions began to tell on him, and he was
+ anxious that I should change places with him till he could rest a little.
+ But I told him this was impossible; for if the steering oar were dropped a
+ moment while we changed, the boat would slue around into the trough of the
+ sea, capsize, and in less than five minutes we would have a hundred
+ gallons of soap- suds in us and be eaten up so quickly that we could not
+ even be present at our own inquest.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But things cannot last always. Just as the darkness shut down we came
+ booming into port, head on. Higbie dropped his oars to hurrah&mdash;I
+ dropped mine to help&mdash;the sea gave the boat a twist, and over she
+ went!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The agony that alkali water inflicts on bruises, chafes and blistered
+ hands, is unspeakable, and nothing but greasing all over will modify it&mdash;but
+ we ate, drank and slept well, that night, notwithstanding.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In speaking of the peculiarities of Mono Lake, I ought to have mentioned
+ that at intervals all around its shores stand picturesque turret-looking
+ masses and clusters of a whitish, coarse-grained rock that resembles
+ inferior mortar dried hard; and if one breaks off fragments of this rock
+ he will find perfectly shaped and thoroughly petrified gulls' eggs deeply
+ imbedded in the mass. How did they get there? I simply state the fact&mdash;for
+ it is a fact&mdash;and leave the geological reader to crack the nut at his
+ leisure and solve the problem after his own fashion.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At the end of a week we adjourned to the Sierras on a fishing excursion,
+ and spent several days in camp under snowy Castle Peak, and fished
+ successfully for trout in a bright, miniature lake whose surface was
+ between ten and eleven thousand feet above the level of the sea; cooling
+ ourselves during the hot August noons by sitting on snow banks ten feet
+ deep, under whose sheltering edges fine grass and dainty flowers
+ flourished luxuriously; and at night entertaining ourselves by almost
+ freezing to death. Then we returned to Mono Lake, and finding that the
+ cement excitement was over for the present, packed up and went back to
+ Esmeralda. Mr. Ballou reconnoitred awhile, and not liking the prospect,
+ set out alone for Humboldt.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ About this time occurred a little incident which has always had a sort of
+ interest to me, from the fact that it came so near "instigating" my
+ funeral. At a time when an Indian attack had been expected, the citizens
+ hid their gunpowder where it would be safe and yet convenient to hand when
+ wanted. A neighbor of ours hid six cans of rifle powder in the bake-oven
+ of an old discarded cooking stove which stood on the open ground near a
+ frame out-house or shed, and from and after that day never thought of it
+ again. We hired a half-tamed Indian to do some washing for us, and he took
+ up quarters under the shed with his tub. The ancient stove reposed within
+ six feet of him, and before his face. Finally it occurred to him that hot
+ water would be better than cold, and he went out and fired up under that
+ forgotten powder magazine and set on a kettle of water. Then he returned
+ to his tub.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I entered the shed presently and threw down some more clothes, and was
+ about to speak to him when the stove blew up with a prodigious crash, and
+ disappeared, leaving not a splinter behind. Fragments of it fell in the
+ streets full two hundred yards away. Nearly a third of the shed roof over
+ our heads was destroyed, and one of the stove lids, after cutting a small
+ stanchion half in two in front of the Indian, whizzed between us and drove
+ partly through the weather-boarding beyond. I was as white as a sheet and
+ as weak as a kitten and speechless. But the Indian betrayed no
+ trepidation, no distress, not even discomfort. He simply stopped washing,
+ leaned forward and surveyed the clean, blank ground a moment, and then
+ remarked:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link275" id="link275"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="275.jpg (68K)" src="images/275.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Mph! Dam stove heap gone!"&mdash;and resumed his scrubbing as placidly as
+ if it were an entirely customary thing for a stove to do. I will explain,
+ that "heap" is "Injun-English" for "very much." The reader will perceive
+ the exhaustive expressiveness of it in the present instance.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link276" id="link276"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="276.jpg (30K)" src="images/276.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch40" id="linkch40"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XL.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I now come to a curious episode&mdash;the most curious, I think, that had
+ yet accented my slothful, valueless, heedless career. Out of a hillside
+ toward the upper end of the town, projected a wall of reddish looking
+ quartz-croppings, the exposed comb of a silver-bearing ledge that extended
+ deep down into the earth, of course. It was owned by a company entitled
+ the "Wide West." There was a shaft sixty or seventy feet deep on the under
+ side of the croppings, and everybody was acquainted with the rock that
+ came from it&mdash;and tolerably rich rock it was, too, but nothing
+ extraordinary. I will remark here, that although to the inexperienced
+ stranger all the quartz of a particular "district" looks about alike, an
+ old resident of the camp can take a glance at a mixed pile of rock,
+ separate the fragments and tell you which mine each came from, as easily
+ as a confectioner can separate and classify the various kinds and
+ qualities of candy in a mixed heap of the article.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ All at once the town was thrown into a state of extraordinary excitement.
+ In mining parlance the Wide West had "struck it rich!" Everybody went to
+ see the new developments, and for some days there was such a crowd of
+ people about the Wide West shaft that a stranger would have supposed there
+ was a mass meeting in session there. No other topic was discussed but the
+ rich strike, and nobody thought or dreamed about anything else. Every man
+ brought away a specimen, ground it up in a hand mortar, washed it out in
+ his horn spoon, and glared speechless upon the marvelous result. It was
+ not hard rock, but black, decomposed stuff which could be crumbled in the
+ hand like a baked potato, and when spread out on a paper exhibited a thick
+ sprinkling of gold and particles of "native" silver. Higbie brought a
+ handful to the cabin, and when he had washed it out his amazement was
+ beyond description. Wide West stock soared skywards. It was said that
+ repeated offers had been made for it at a thousand dollars a foot, and
+ promptly refused. We have all had the "blues"&mdash;the mere sky- blues&mdash;but
+ mine were indigo, now&mdash;because I did not own in the Wide West. The
+ world seemed hollow to me, and existence a grief. I lost my appetite, and
+ ceased to take an interest in anything. Still I had to stay, and listen to
+ other people's rejoicings, because I had no money to get out of the camp
+ with.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Wide West company put a stop to the carrying away of "specimens," and
+ well they might, for every handful of the ore was worth a sun of some
+ consequence. To show the exceeding value of the ore, I will remark that a
+ sixteen-hundred-pounds parcel of it was sold, just as it lay, at the mouth
+ of the shaft, at one dollar a pound; and the man who bought it "packed" it
+ on mules a hundred and fifty or two hundred miles, over the mountains, to
+ San Francisco, satisfied that it would yield at a rate that would richly
+ compensate him for his trouble. The Wide West people also commanded their
+ foreman to refuse any but their own operatives permission to enter the
+ mine at any time or for any purpose. I kept up my "blue" meditations and
+ Higbie kept up a deal of thinking, too, but of a different sort. He
+ puzzled over the "rock," examined it with a glass, inspected it in
+ different lights and from different points of view, and after each
+ experiment delivered himself, in soliloquy, of one and the same unvarying
+ opinion in the same unvarying formula:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "It is not Wide West rock!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He said once or twice that he meant to have a look into the Wide West
+ shaft if he got shot for it. I was wretched, and did not care whether he
+ got a look into it or not. He failed that day, and tried again at night;
+ failed again; got up at dawn and tried, and failed again. Then he lay in
+ ambush in the sage brush hour after hour, waiting for the two or three
+ hands to adjourn to the shade of a boulder for dinner; made a start once,
+ but was premature&mdash;one of the men came back for something; tried it
+ again, but when almost at the mouth of the shaft, another of the men rose
+ up from behind the boulder as if to reconnoitre, and he dropped on the
+ ground and lay quiet; presently he crawled on his hands and knees to the
+ mouth of the shaft, gave a quick glance around, then seized the rope and
+ slid down the shaft.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link279" id="link279"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="279.jpg (47K)" src="images/279.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He disappeared in the gloom of a "side drift" just as a head appeared in
+ the mouth of the shaft and somebody shouted "Hello!"&mdash;which he did
+ not answer. He was not disturbed any more. An hour later he entered the
+ cabin, hot, red, and ready to burst with smothered excitement, and
+ exclaimed in a stage whisper:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I knew it! We are rich! IT'S A BLIND LEAD!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I thought the very earth reeled under me. Doubt&mdash;conviction&mdash;doubt
+ again&mdash;exultation&mdash;hope, amazement, belief, unbelief&mdash;every
+ emotion imaginable swept in wild procession through my heart and brain,
+ and I could not speak a word. After a moment or two of this mental fury, I
+ shook myself to rights, and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Say it again!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "It's blind lead!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Cal, let's&mdash;let's burn the house&mdash;or kill somebody! Let's get
+ out where there's room to hurrah! But what is the use? It is a hundred
+ times too good to be true."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "It's a blind lead, for a million!&mdash;hanging wall&mdash;foot wall&mdash;clay
+ casings&mdash;everything complete!" He swung his hat and gave three
+ cheers, and I cast doubt to the winds and chimed in with a will. For I was
+ worth a million dollars, and did not care "whether school kept or not!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link280" id="link280"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="280.jpg (50K)" src="images/280.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But perhaps I ought to explain. A "blind lead" is a lead or ledge that
+ does not "crop out" above the surface. A miner does not know where to look
+ for such leads, but they are often stumbled upon by accident in the course
+ of driving a tunnel or sinking a shaft. Higbie knew the Wide West rock
+ perfectly well, and the more he had examined the new developments the more
+ he was satisfied that the ore could not have come from the Wide West vein.
+ And so had it occurred to him alone, of all the camp, that there was a
+ blind lead down in the shaft, and that even the Wide West people
+ themselves did not suspect it. He was right. When he went down the shaft,
+ he found that the blind lead held its independent way through the Wide
+ West vein, cutting it diagonally, and that it was enclosed in its own
+ well-defined casing-rocks and clay. Hence it was public property. Both
+ leads being perfectly well defined, it was easy for any miner to see which
+ one belonged to the Wide West and which did not.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We thought it well to have a strong friend, and therefore we brought the
+ foreman of the Wide West to our cabin that night and revealed the great
+ surprise to him. Higbie said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "We are going to take possession of this blind lead, record it and
+ establish ownership, and then forbid the Wide West company to take out any
+ more of the rock. You cannot help your company in this matter&mdash;nobody
+ can help them. I will go into the shaft with you and prove to your entire
+ satisfaction that it is a blind lead. Now we propose to take you in with
+ us, and claim the blind lead in our three names. What do you say?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ What could a man say who had an opportunity to simply stretch forth his
+ hand and take possession of a fortune without risk of any kind and without
+ wronging any one or attaching the least taint of dishonor to his name? He
+ could only say, "Agreed."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The notice was put up that night, and duly spread upon the recorder's
+ books before ten o'clock. We claimed two hundred feet each&mdash;six
+ hundred feet in all&mdash;the smallest and compactest organization in the
+ district, and the easiest to manage.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ No one can be so thoughtless as to suppose that we slept, that night.
+ Higbie and I went to bed at midnight, but it was only to lie broad awake
+ and think, dream, scheme. The floorless, tumble-down cabin was a palace,
+ the ragged gray blankets silk, the furniture rosewood and mahogany. Each
+ new splendor that burst out of my visions of the future whirled me bodily
+ over in bed or jerked me to a sitting posture just as if an electric
+ battery had been applied to me. We shot fragments of conversation back and
+ forth at each other. Once Higbie said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "When are you going home&mdash;to the States?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "To-morrow!"&mdash;with an evolution or two, ending with a sitting
+ position. "Well&mdash;no&mdash;but next month, at furthest."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "We'll go in the same steamer."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Agreed."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A pause.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Steamer of the 10th?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Yes. No, the 1st."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "All right."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Another pause.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Where are you going to live?" said Higbie.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "San Francisco."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "That's me!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Pause.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Too high&mdash;too much climbing"&mdash;from Higbie.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "What is?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I was thinking of Russian Hill&mdash;building a house up there."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Too much climbing? Shan't you keep a carriage?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Of course. I forgot that."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Pause.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link282" id="link282"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="282.jpg (70K)" src="images/282.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Cal., what kind of a house are you going to build?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I was thinking about that. Three-story and an attic."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "But what kind?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, I don't hardly know. Brick, I suppose."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Brick&mdash;bosh."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why? What is your idea?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Brown stone front&mdash;French plate glass&mdash;billiard-room off the
+ dining- room&mdash;statuary and paintings&mdash;shrubbery and two-acre
+ grass plat&mdash;greenhouse&mdash;iron dog on the front stoop&mdash;gray
+ horses&mdash;landau, and a coachman with a bug on his hat!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "By George!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A long pause.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Cal., when are you going to Europe?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well&mdash;I hadn't thought of that. When are you?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "In the Spring."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Going to be gone all summer?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "All summer! I shall remain there three years."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No&mdash;but are you in earnest?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Indeed I am."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I will go along too."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why of course you will."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "What part of Europe shall you go to?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "All parts. France, England, Germany&mdash;Spain, Italy, Switzerland,
+ Syria, Greece, Palestine, Arabia, Persia, Egypt&mdash;all over&mdash;everywhere."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I'm agreed."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "All right."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Won't it be a swell trip!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "We'll spend forty or fifty thousand dollars trying to make it one,
+ anyway."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Another long pause.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Higbie, we owe the butcher six dollars, and he has been threatening to
+ stop our&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Hang the butcher!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Amen."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And so it went on. By three o'clock we found it was no use, and so we got
+ up and played cribbage and smoked pipes till sunrise. It was my week to
+ cook. I always hated cooking&mdash;now, I abhorred it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The news was all over town. The former excitement was great&mdash;this one
+ was greater still. I walked the streets serene and happy. Higbie said the
+ foreman had been offered two hundred thousand dollars for his third of the
+ mine. I said I would like to see myself selling for any such price. My
+ ideas were lofty. My figure was a million. Still, I honestly believe that
+ if I had been offered it, it would have had no other effect than to make
+ me hold off for more.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I found abundant enjoyment in being rich. A man offered me a three-
+ hundred-dollar horse, and wanted to take my simple, unendorsed note for
+ it. That brought the most realizing sense I had yet had that I was
+ actually rich, beyond shadow of doubt. It was followed by numerous other
+ evidences of a similar nature&mdash;among which I may mention the fact of
+ the butcher leaving us a double supply of meat and saying nothing about
+ money.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By the laws of the district, the "locators" or claimants of a ledge were
+ obliged to do a fair and reasonable amount of work on their new property
+ within ten days after the date of the location, or the property was
+ forfeited, and anybody could go and seize it that chose. So we determined
+ to go to work the next day. About the middle of the afternoon, as I was
+ coming out of the post office, I met a Mr. Gardiner, who told me that
+ Capt. John Nye was lying dangerously ill at his place (the "Nine-Mile
+ Ranch"), and that he and his wife were not able to give him nearly as much
+ care and attention as his case demanded. I said if he would wait for me a
+ moment, I would go down and help in the sick room. I ran to the cabin to
+ tell Higbie. He was not there, but I left a note on the table for him, and
+ a few minutes later I left town in Gardiner's wagon.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch41" id="linkch41"></a>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XLI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Captain Nye was very ill indeed, with spasmodic rheumatism. But the old
+ gentleman was himself&mdash;which is to say, he was kind-hearted and
+ agreeable when comfortable, but a singularly violent wild-cat when things
+ did not go well. He would be smiling along pleasantly enough, when a
+ sudden spasm of his disease would take him and he would go out of his
+ smile into a perfect fury. He would groan and wail and howl with the
+ anguish, and fill up the odd chinks with the most elaborate profanity that
+ strong convictions and a fine fancy could contrive. With fair opportunity
+ he could swear very well and handle his adjectives with considerable
+ judgment; but when the spasm was on him it was painful to listen to him,
+ he was so awkward. However, I had seen him nurse a sick man himself and
+ put up patiently with the inconveniences of the situation, and
+ consequently I was willing that he should have full license now that his
+ own turn had come. He could not disturb me, with all his raving and
+ ranting, for my mind had work on hand, and it labored on diligently, night
+ and day, whether my hands were idle or employed. I was altering and
+ amending the plans for my house, and thinking over the propriety of having
+ the billard-room in the attic, instead of on the same floor with the
+ dining-room; also, I was trying to decide between green and blue for the
+ upholstery of the drawing-room, for, although my preference was blue I
+ feared it was a color that would be too easily damaged by dust and
+ sunlight; likewise while I was content to put the coachman in a modest
+ livery, I was uncertain about a footman&mdash;I needed one, and was even
+ resolved to have one, but wished he could properly appear and perform his
+ functions out of livery, for I somewhat dreaded so much show; and yet,
+ inasmuch as my late grandfather had had a coachman and such things, but no
+ liveries, I felt rather drawn to beat him;&mdash;or beat his ghost, at any
+ rate; I was also systematizing the European trip, and managed to get it
+ all laid out, as to route and length of time to be devoted to it&mdash;everything,
+ with one exception&mdash;namely, whether to cross the desert from Cairo to
+ Jerusalem per camel, or go by sea to Beirut, and thence down through the
+ country per caravan. Meantime I was writing to the friends at home every
+ day, instructing them concerning all my plans and intentions, and
+ directing them to look up a handsome homestead for my mother and agree
+ upon a price for it against my coming, and also directing them to sell my
+ share of the Tennessee land and tender the proceeds to the widows' and
+ orphans' fund of the typographical union of which I had long been a member
+ in good standing. [This Tennessee land had been in the possession of the
+ family many years, and promised to confer high fortune upon us some day;
+ it still promises it, but in a less violent way.]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link287" id="link287"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="287.jpg (69K)" src="images/287.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When I had been nursing the Captain nine days he was somewhat better, but
+ very feeble. During the afternoon we lifted him into a chair and gave him
+ an alcoholic vapor bath, and then set about putting him on the bed again.
+ We had to be exceedingly careful, for the least jar produced pain.
+ Gardiner had his shoulders and I his legs; in an unfortunate moment I
+ stumbled and the patient fell heavily on the bed in an agony of torture. I
+ never heard a man swear so in my life. He raved like a maniac, and tried
+ to snatch a revolver from the table&mdash;but I got it. He ordered me out
+ of the house, and swore a world of oaths that he would kill me wherever he
+ caught me when he got on his feet again. It was simply a passing fury, and
+ meant nothing. I knew he would forget it in an hour, and maybe be sorry
+ for it, too; but it angered me a little, at the moment. So much so,
+ indeed, that I determined to go back to Esmeralda. I thought he was able
+ to get along alone, now, since he was on the war path. I took supper, and
+ as soon as the moon rose, began my nine-mile journey, on foot.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Even millionaires needed no horses, in those days, for a mere nine-mile
+ jaunt without baggage.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ As I "raised the hill" overlooking the town, it lacked fifteen minutes of
+ twelve. I glanced at the hill over beyond the canyon, and in the bright
+ moonlight saw what appeared to be about half the population of the village
+ massed on and around the Wide West croppings. My heart gave an exulting
+ bound, and I said to myself, "They have made a new strike to- night&mdash;and
+ struck it richer than ever, no doubt." I started over there, but gave it
+ up. I said the "strick" would keep, and I had climbed hill enough for one
+ night. I went on down through the town, and as I was passing a little
+ German bakery, a woman ran out and begged me to come in and help her. She
+ said her husband had a fit. I went in, and judged she was right&mdash;he
+ appeared to have a hundred of them, compressed into one. Two Germans were
+ there, trying to hold him, and not making much of a success of it. I ran
+ up the street half a block or so and routed out a sleeping doctor, brought
+ him down half dressed, and we four wrestled with the maniac, and doctored,
+ drenched and bled him, for more than an hour, and the poor German woman
+ did the crying. He grew quiet, now, and the doctor and I withdrew and left
+ him to his friends.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was a little after one o'clock. As I entered the cabin door, tired but
+ jolly, the dingy light of a tallow candle revealed Higbie, sitting by the
+ pine table gazing stupidly at my note, which he held in his fingers, and
+ looking pale, old, and haggard. I halted, and looked at him. He looked at
+ me, stolidly. I said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Higbie, what&mdash;what is it?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "We're ruined&mdash;we didn't do the work&mdash;THE BLIND LEAD'S
+ RELOCATED!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link288" id="link288"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="288.jpg (57K)" src="images/288.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was enough. I sat down sick, grieved&mdash;broken-hearted, indeed. A
+ minute before, I was rich and brimful of vanity; I was a pauper now, and
+ very meek. We sat still an hour, busy with thought, busy with vain and
+ useless self-upbraidings, busy with "Why didn't I do this, and why didn't
+ I do that," but neither spoke a word. Then we dropped into mutual
+ explanations, and the mystery was cleared away. It came out that Higbie
+ had depended on me, as I had on him, and as both of us had on the foreman.
+ The folly of it! It was the first time that ever staid and steadfast
+ Higbie had left an important matter to chance or failed to be true to his
+ full share of a responsibility.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But he had never seen my note till this moment, and this moment was the
+ first time he had been in the cabin since the day he had seen me last. He,
+ also, had left a note for me, on that same fatal afternoon&mdash;had
+ ridden up on horseback, and looked through the window, and being in a
+ hurry and not seeing me, had tossed the note into the cabin through a
+ broken pane. Here it was, on the floor, where it had remained undisturbed
+ for nine days:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Don't fail to do the work before the ten days expire. W. has passed
+ through and given me notice. I am to join him at Mono Lake, and we shall
+ go on from there to-night. He says he will find it this time, sure. CAL."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "W." meant Whiteman, of course. That thrice accursed "cement!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ That was the way of it. An old miner, like Higbie, could no more withstand
+ the fascination of a mysterious mining excitement like this "cement"
+ foolishness, than he could refrain from eating when he was famishing.
+ Higbie had been dreaming about the marvelous cement for months; and now,
+ against his better judgment, he had gone off and "taken the chances" on my
+ keeping secure a mine worth a million undiscovered cement veins. They had
+ not been followed this time. His riding out of town in broad daylight was
+ such a common-place thing to do that it had not attracted any attention.
+ He said they prosecuted their search in the fastnesses of the mountains
+ during nine days, without success; they could not find the cement. Then a
+ ghastly fear came over him that something might have happened to prevent
+ the doing of the necessary work to hold the blind lead (though indeed he
+ thought such a thing hardly possible), and forthwith he started home with
+ all speed. He would have reached Esmeralda in time, but his horse broke
+ down and he had to walk a great part of the distance. And so it happened
+ that as he came into Esmeralda by one road, I entered it by another. His
+ was the superior energy, however, for he went straight to the Wide West,
+ instead of turning aside as I had done&mdash;and he arrived there about
+ five or ten minutes too late! The "notice" was already up, the
+ "relocation" of our mine completed beyond recall, and the crowd rapidly
+ dispersing. He learned some facts before he left the ground. The foreman
+ had not been seen about the streets since the night we had located the
+ mine&mdash;a telegram had called him to California on a matter of life and
+ death, it was said. At any rate he had done no work and the watchful eyes
+ of the community were taking note of the fact. At midnight of this woful
+ tenth day, the ledge would be "relocatable," and by eleven o'clock the
+ hill was black with men prepared to do the relocating. That was the crowd
+ I had seen when I fancied a new "strike" had been made&mdash;idiot that I
+ was.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link290" id="link290"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="290.jpg (141K)" src="images/290.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ [We three had the same right to relocate the lead that other people had,
+ provided we were quick enough.] As midnight was announced, fourteen men,
+ duly armed and ready to back their proceedings, put up their "notice" and
+ proclaimed their ownership of the blind lead, under the new name of the
+ "Johnson." But A. D. Allen our partner (the foreman) put in a sudden
+ appearance about that time, with a cocked revolver in his hand, and said
+ his name must be added to the list, or he would "thin out the Johnson
+ company some." He was a manly, splendid, determined fellow, and known to
+ be as good as his word, and therefore a compromise was effected. They put
+ in his name for a hundred feet, reserving to themselves the customary two
+ hundred feet each. Such was the history of the night's events, as Higbie
+ gathered from a friend on the way home.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Higbie and I cleared out on a new mining excitement the next morning, glad
+ to get away from the scene of our sufferings, and after a month or two of
+ hardship and disappointment, returned to Esmeralda once more. Then we
+ learned that the Wide West and the Johnson companies had consolidated;
+ that the stock, thus united, comprised five thousand feet, or shares; that
+ the foreman, apprehending tiresome litigation, and considering such a huge
+ concern unwieldy, had sold his hundred feet for ninety thousand dollars in
+ gold and gone home to the States to enjoy it. If the stock was worth such
+ a gallant figure, with five thousand shares in the corporation, it makes
+ me dizzy to think what it would have been worth with only our original six
+ hundred in it. It was the difference between six hundred men owning a
+ house and five thousand owning it. We would have been millionaires if we
+ had only worked with pick and spade one little day on our property and so
+ secured our ownership!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It reads like a wild fancy sketch, but the evidence of many witnesses, and
+ likewise that of the official records of Esmeralda District, is easily
+ obtainable in proof that it is a true history. I can always have it to say
+ that I was absolutely and unquestionably worth a million dollars, once,
+ for ten days.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A year ago my esteemed and in every way estimable old millionaire partner,
+ Higbie, wrote me from an obscure little mining camp in California that
+ after nine or ten years of buffetings and hard striving, he was at last in
+ a position where he could command twenty-five hundred dollars, and said he
+ meant to go into the fruit business in a modest way. How such a thought
+ would have insulted him the night we lay in our cabin planning European
+ trips and brown stone houses on Russian Hill!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch42" id="linkch42"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XLII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ What to do next?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was a momentous question. I had gone out into the world to shift for
+ myself, at the age of thirteen (for my father had endorsed for friends;
+ and although he left us a sumptuous legacy of pride in his fine Virginian
+ stock and its national distinction, I presently found that I could not
+ live on that alone without occasional bread to wash it down with). I had
+ gained a livelihood in various vocations, but had not dazzled anybody with
+ my successes; still the list was before me, and the amplest liberty in the
+ matter of choosing, provided I wanted to work&mdash;which I did not, after
+ being so wealthy. I had once been a grocery clerk, for one day, but had
+ consumed so much sugar in that time that I was relieved from further duty
+ by the proprietor; said he wanted me outside, so that he could have my
+ custom. I had studied law an entire week, and then given it up because it
+ was so prosy and tiresome. I had engaged briefly in the study of
+ blacksmithing, but wasted so much time trying to fix the bellows so that
+ it would blow itself, that the master turned me adrift in disgrace, and
+ told me I would come to no good. I had been a bookseller's clerk for
+ awhile, but the customers bothered me so much I could not read with any
+ comfort, and so the proprietor gave me a furlough and forgot to put a
+ limit to it. I had clerked in a drug store part of a summer, but my
+ prescriptions were unlucky, and we appeared to sell more stomach pumps
+ than soda water. So I had to go.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link293" id="link293"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="293.jpg (43K)" src="images/293.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I had made of myself a tolerable printer, under the impression that I
+ would be another Franklin some day, but somehow had missed the connection
+ thus far. There was no berth open in the Esmeralda Union, and besides I
+ had always been such a slow compositor that I looked with envy upon the
+ achievements of apprentices of two years' standing; and when I took a
+ "take," foremen were in the habit of suggesting that it would be wanted
+ "some time during the year."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I was a good average St. Louis and New Orleans pilot and by no means
+ ashamed of my abilities in that line; wages were two hundred and fifty
+ dollars a month and no board to pay, and I did long to stand behind a
+ wheel again and never roam any more&mdash;but I had been making such an
+ ass of myself lately in grandiloquent letters home about my blind lead and
+ my European excursion that I did what many and many a poor disappointed
+ miner had done before; said "It is all over with me now, and I will never
+ go back home to be pitied&mdash;and snubbed." I had been a private
+ secretary, a silver miner and a silver mill operative, and amounted to
+ less than nothing in each, and now&mdash;
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ What to do next?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I yielded to Higbie's appeals and consented to try the mining once more.
+ We climbed far up on the mountain side and went to work on a little
+ rubbishy claim of ours that had a shaft on it eight feet deep. Higbie
+ descended into it and worked bravely with his pick till he had loosened up
+ a deal of rock and dirt and then I went down with a long-handled shovel
+ (the most awkward invention yet contrived by man) to throw it out. You
+ must brace the shovel forward with the side of your knee till it is full,
+ and then, with a skilful toss, throw it backward over your left shoulder.
+ I made the toss, and landed the mess just on the edge of the shaft and it
+ all came back on my head and down the back of my neck. I never said a
+ word, but climbed out and walked home. I inwardly resolved that I would
+ starve before I would make a target of myself and shoot rubbish at it with
+ a long-handled shovel.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link294" id="link294"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="294.jpg (50K)" src="images/294.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I sat down, in the cabin, and gave myself up to solid misery&mdash;so to
+ speak. Now in pleasanter days I had amused myself with writing letters to
+ the chief paper of the Territory, the Virginia Daily Territorial
+ Enterprise, and had always been surprised when they appeared in print. My
+ good opinion of the editors had steadily declined; for it seemed to me
+ that they might have found something better to fill up with than my
+ literature. I had found a letter in the post office as I came home from
+ the hill side, and finally I opened it. Eureka! [I never did know what
+ Eureka meant, but it seems to be as proper a word to heave in as any when
+ no other that sounds pretty offers.] It was a deliberate offer to me of
+ Twenty-Five Dollars a week to come up to Virginia and be city editor of
+ the Enterprise.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I would have challenged the publisher in the "blind lead" days&mdash;I
+ wanted to fall down and worship him, now. Twenty-Five Dollars a week&mdash;it
+ looked like bloated luxury&mdash;a fortune a sinful and lavish waste of
+ money. But my transports cooled when I thought of my inexperience and
+ consequent unfitness for the position&mdash;and straightway, on top of
+ this, my long array of failures rose up before me. Yet if I refused this
+ place I must presently become dependent upon somebody for my bread, a
+ thing necessarily distasteful to a man who had never experienced such a
+ humiliation since he was thirteen years old. Not much to be proud of,
+ since it is so common&mdash;but then it was all I had to be proud of. So I
+ was scared into being a city editor. I would have declined, otherwise.
+ Necessity is the mother of "taking chances." I do not doubt that if, at
+ that time, I had been offered a salary to translate the Talmud from the
+ original Hebrew, I would have accepted&mdash;albeit with diffidence and
+ some misgivings&mdash;and thrown as much variety into it as I could for
+ the money.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link295" id="link295"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="295.jpg (34K)" src="images/295.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I went up to Virginia and entered upon my new vocation. I was a rusty
+ looking city editor, I am free to confess&mdash;coatless, slouch hat, blue
+ woolen shirt, pantaloons stuffed into boot-tops, whiskered half down to
+ the waist, and the universal navy revolver slung to my belt. But I secured
+ a more Christian costume and discarded the revolver.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I had never had occasion to kill anybody, nor ever felt a desire to do so,
+ but had worn the thing in deference to popular sentiment, and in order
+ that I might not, by its absence, be offensively conspicuous, and a
+ subject of remark. But the other editors, and all the printers, carried
+ revolvers. I asked the chief editor and proprietor (Mr. Goodman, I will
+ call him, since it describes him as well as any name could do) for some
+ instructions with regard to my duties, and he told me to go all over town
+ and ask all sorts of people all sorts of questions, make notes of the
+ information gained, and write them out for publication. And he added:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Never say 'We learn' so-and-so, or 'It is reported,' or 'It is rumored,'
+ or 'We understand' so-and-so, but go to headquarters and get the absolute
+ facts, and then speak out and say 'It is so-and-so.' Otherwise, people
+ will not put confidence in your news. Unassailable certainly is the thing
+ that gives a newspaper the firmest and most valuable reputation."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was the whole thing in a nut-shell; and to this day when I find a
+ reporter commencing his article with "We understand," I gather a suspicion
+ that he has not taken as much pains to inform himself as he ought to have
+ done. I moralize well, but I did not always practise well when I was a
+ city editor; I let fancy get the upper hand of fact too often when there
+ was a dearth of news. I can never forget my first day's experience as a
+ reporter. I wandered about town questioning everybody, boring everybody,
+ and finding out that nobody knew anything. At the end of five hours my
+ notebook was still barren. I spoke to Mr. Goodman. He said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Dan used to make a good thing out of the hay wagons in a dry time when
+ there were no fires or inquests. Are there no hay wagons in from the
+ Truckee? If there are, you might speak of the renewed activity and all
+ that sort of thing, in the hay business, you know.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link296" id="link296"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="296.jpg (34K)" src="images/296.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "It isn't sensational or exciting, but it fills up and looks business
+ like."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I canvassed the city again and found one wretched old hay truck dragging
+ in from the country. But I made affluent use of it. I multiplied it by
+ sixteen, brought it into town from sixteen different directions, made
+ sixteen separate items out of it, and got up such another sweat about hay
+ as Virginia City had never seen in the world before.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This was encouraging. Two nonpareil columns had to be filled, and I was
+ getting along. Presently, when things began to look dismal again, a
+ desperado killed a man in a saloon and joy returned once more. I never was
+ so glad over any mere trifle before in my life. I said to the murderer:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Sir, you are a stranger to me, but you have done me a kindness this day
+ which I can never forget. If whole years of gratitude can be to you any
+ slight compensation, they shall be yours. I was in trouble and you have
+ relieved me nobly and at a time when all seemed dark and drear. Count me
+ your friend from this time forth, for I am not a man to forget a favor."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link297" id="link297"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="297.jpg (44K)" src="images/297.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ If I did not really say that to him I at least felt a sort of itching
+ desire to do it. I wrote up the murder with a hungry attention to details,
+ and when it was finished experienced but one regret&mdash;namely, that
+ they had not hanged my benefactor on the spot, so that I could work him up
+ too.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next I discovered some emigrant wagons going into camp on the plaza and
+ found that they had lately come through the hostile Indian country and had
+ fared rather roughly. I made the best of the item that the circumstances
+ permitted, and felt that if I were not confined within rigid limits by the
+ presence of the reporters of the other papers I could add particulars that
+ would make the article much more interesting. However, I found one wagon
+ that was going on to California, and made some judicious inquiries of the
+ proprietor. When I learned, through his short and surly answers to my
+ cross-questioning, that he was certainly going on and would not be in the
+ city next day to make trouble, I got ahead of the other papers, for I took
+ down his list of names and added his party to the killed and wounded.
+ Having more scope here, I put this wagon through an Indian fight that to
+ this day has no parallel in history.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ My two columns were filled. When I read them over in the morning I felt
+ that I had found my legitimate occupation at last. I reasoned within
+ myself that news, and stirring news, too, was what a paper needed, and I
+ felt that I was peculiarly endowed with the ability to furnish it. Mr.
+ Goodman said that I was as good a reporter as Dan. I desired no higher
+ commendation. With encouragement like that, I felt that I could take my
+ pen and murder all the immigrants on the plains if need be and the
+ interests of the paper demanded it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link298" id="link298"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="298.jpg (22K)" src="images/298.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch43" id="linkch43"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XLIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ However, as I grew better acquainted with the business and learned the run
+ of the sources of information I ceased to require the aid of fancy to any
+ large extent, and became able to fill my columns without diverging
+ noticeably from the domain of fact.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I struck up friendships with the reporters of the other journals, and we
+ swapped "regulars" with each other and thus economized work. "Regulars"
+ are permanent sources of news, like courts, bullion returns, "clean-ups"
+ at the quartz mills, and inquests. Inasmuch as everybody went armed, we
+ had an inquest about every day, and so this department was naturally set
+ down among the "regulars." We had lively papers in those days. My great
+ competitor among the reporters was Boggs of the Union. He was an excellent
+ reporter. Once in three or four months he would get a little intoxicated,
+ but as a general thing he was a wary and cautious drinker although always
+ ready to tamper a little with the enemy. He had the advantage of me in one
+ thing; he could get the monthly public school report and I could not,
+ because the principal hated the Enterprise. One snowy night when the
+ report was due, I started out sadly wondering how I was going to get it.
+ Presently, a few steps up the almost deserted street I stumbled on Boggs
+ and asked him where he was going.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "After the school report."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I'll go along with you."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No, sir. I'll excuse you."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Just as you say."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A saloon-keeper's boy passed by with a steaming pitcher of hot punch, and
+ Boggs snuffed the fragrance gratefully. He gazed fondly after the boy and
+ saw him start up the Enterprise stairs. I said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I wish you could help me get that school business, but since you can't, I
+ must run up to the Union office and see if I can get them to let me have a
+ proof of it after they have set it up, though I don't begin to suppose
+ they will. Good night."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Hold on a minute. I don't mind getting the report and sitting around with
+ the boys a little, while you copy it, if you're willing to drop down to
+ the principal's with me."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Now you talk like a rational being. Come along."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We plowed a couple of blocks through the snow, got the report and returned
+ to our office. It was a short document and soon copied. Meantime Boggs
+ helped himself to the punch. I gave the manuscript back to him and we
+ started out to get an inquest, for we heard pistol shots near by. We got
+ the particulars with little loss of time, for it was only an inferior sort
+ of bar-room murder, and of little interest to the public, and then we
+ separated. Away at three o'clock in the morning, when we had gone to press
+ and were having a relaxing concert as usual&mdash;for some of the printers
+ were good singers and others good performers on the guitar and on that
+ atrocity the accordion&mdash;the proprietor of the Union strode in and
+ desired to know if anybody had heard anything of Boggs or the school
+ report. We stated the case, and all turned out to help hunt for the
+ delinquent. We found him standing on a table in a saloon, with an old tin
+ lantern in one hand and the school report in the other, haranguing a gang
+ of intoxicated Cornish miners on the iniquity of squandering the public
+ moneys on education "when hundreds and hundreds of honest hard-working men
+ are literally starving for whiskey." [Riotous applause.] He had been
+ assisting in a regal spree with those parties for hours. We dragged him
+ away and put him to bed.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link301" id="link301"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="301.jpg (93K)" src="images/301.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Of course there was no school report in the Union, and Boggs held me
+ accountable, though I was innocent of any intention or desire to compass
+ its absence from that paper and was as sorry as any one that the
+ misfortune had occurred.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But we were perfectly friendly. The day that the school report was next
+ due, the proprietor of the "Genessee" mine furnished us a buggy and asked
+ us to go down and write something about the property&mdash;a very common
+ request and one always gladly acceded to when people furnished buggies,
+ for we were as fond of pleasure excursions as other people. In due time we
+ arrived at the "mine"&mdash;nothing but a hole in the ground ninety feet
+ deep, and no way of getting down into it but by holding on to a rope and
+ being lowered with a windlass. The workmen had just gone off somewhere to
+ dinner. I was not strong enough to lower Boggs's bulk; so I took an
+ unlighted candle in my teeth, made a loop for my foot in the end of the
+ rope, implored Boggs not to go to sleep or let the windlass get the start
+ of him, and then swung out over the shaft. I reached the bottom muddy and
+ bruised about the elbows, but safe. I lit the candle, made an examination
+ of the rock, selected some specimens and shouted to Boggs to hoist away.
+ No answer. Presently a head appeared in the circle of daylight away aloft,
+ and a voice came down:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Are you all set?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "All set&mdash;hoist away."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Are you comfortable?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Perfectly."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Could you wait a little?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh certainly&mdash;no particular hurry."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well&mdash;good by."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why? Where are you going?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "After the school report!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link302" id="link302"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="302.jpg (71K)" src="images/302.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And he did. I staid down there an hour, and surprised the workmen when
+ they hauled up and found a man on the rope instead of a bucket of rock. I
+ walked home, too&mdash;five miles&mdash;up hill. We had no school report
+ next morning; but the Union had.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Six months after my entry into journalism the grand "flush times" of
+ Silverland began, and they continued with unabated splendor for three
+ years. All difficulty about filling up the "local department" ceased, and
+ the only trouble now was how to make the lengthened columns hold the world
+ of incidents and happenings that came to our literary net every day.
+ Virginia had grown to be the "livest" town, for its age and population,
+ that America had ever produced. The sidewalks swarmed with people&mdash;to
+ such an extent, indeed, that it was generally no easy matter to stem the
+ human tide. The streets themselves were just as crowded with quartz
+ wagons, freight teams and other vehicles. The procession was endless. So
+ great was the pack, that buggies frequently had to wait half an hour for
+ an opportunity to cross the principal street. Joy sat on every
+ countenance, and there was a glad, almost fierce, intensity in every eye,
+ that told of the money-getting schemes that were seething in every brain
+ and the high hope that held sway in every heart. Money was as plenty as
+ dust; every individual considered himself wealthy, and a melancholy
+ countenance was nowhere to be seen. There were military companies, fire
+ companies, brass bands, banks, hotels, theatres, "hurdy- gurdy houses,"
+ wide-open gambling palaces, political pow-wows, civic processions, street
+ fights, murders, inquests, riots, a whiskey mill every fifteen steps, a
+ Board of Aldermen, a Mayor, a City Surveyor, a City Engineer, a Chief of
+ the Fire Department, with First, Second and Third Assistants, a Chief of
+ Police, City Marshal and a large police force, two Boards of Mining
+ Brokers, a dozen breweries and half a dozen jails and station-houses in
+ full operation, and some talk of building a church. The "flush times" were
+ in magnificent flower! Large fire-proof brick buildings were going up in
+ the principal streets, and the wooden suburbs were spreading out in all
+ directions. Town lots soared up to prices that were amazing.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The great "Comstock lode" stretched its opulent length straight through
+ the town from north to south, and every mine on it was in diligent process
+ of development. One of these mines alone employed six hundred and
+ seventy-five men, and in the matter of elections the adage was, "as the
+ 'Gould and Curry' goes, so goes the city." Laboring men's wages were four
+ and six dollars a day, and they worked in three "shifts" or gangs, and the
+ blasting and picking and shoveling went on without ceasing, night and day.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The "city" of Virginia roosted royally midway up the steep side of Mount
+ Davidson, seven thousand two hundred feet above the level of the sea, and
+ in the clear Nevada atmosphere was visible from a distance of fifty miles!
+ It claimed a population of fifteen thousand to eighteen thousand, and all
+ day long half of this little army swarmed the streets like bees and the
+ other half swarmed among the drifts and tunnels of the "Comstock,"
+ hundreds of feet down in the earth directly under those same streets.
+ Often we felt our chairs jar, and heard the faint boom of a blast down in
+ the bowels of the earth under the office.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The mountain side was so steep that the entire town had a slant to it like
+ a roof. Each street was a terrace, and from each to the next street below
+ the descent was forty or fifty feet. The fronts of the houses were level
+ with the street they faced, but their rear first floors were propped on
+ lofty stilts; a man could stand at a rear first floor window of a C street
+ house and look down the chimneys of the row of houses below him facing D
+ street. It was a laborious climb, in that thin atmosphere, to ascend from
+ D to A street, and you were panting and out of breath when you got there;
+ but you could turn around and go down again like a house a-fire&mdash;so
+ to speak. The atmosphere was so rarified, on account of the great
+ altitude, that one's blood lay near the surface always, and the scratch of
+ a pin was a disaster worth worrying about, for the chances were that a
+ grievous erysipelas would ensue. But to offset this, the thin atmosphere
+ seemed to carry healing to gunshot wounds, and therefore, to simply shoot
+ your adversary through both lungs was a thing not likely to afford you any
+ permanent satisfaction, for he would be nearly certain to be around
+ looking for you within the month, and not with an opera glass, either.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link304" id="link304"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="304.jpg (102K)" src="images/304.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ From Virginia's airy situation one could look over a vast, far-reaching
+ panorama of mountain ranges and deserts; and whether the day was bright or
+ overcast, whether the sun was rising or setting, or flaming in the zenith,
+ or whether night and the moon held sway, the spectacle was always
+ impressive and beautiful. Over your head Mount Davidson lifted its gray
+ dome, and before and below you a rugged canyon clove the battlemented
+ hills, making a sombre gateway through which a soft-tinted desert was
+ glimpsed, with the silver thread of a river winding through it, bordered
+ with trees which many miles of distance diminished to a delicate fringe;
+ and still further away the snowy mountains rose up and stretched their
+ long barrier to the filmy horizon&mdash;far enough beyond a lake that
+ burned in the desert like a fallen sun, though that, itself, lay fifty
+ miles removed. Look from your window where you would, there was
+ fascination in the picture. At rare intervals&mdash;but very rare&mdash;there
+ were clouds in our skies, and then the setting sun would gild and flush
+ and glorify this mighty expanse of scenery with a bewildering pomp of
+ color that held the eye like a spell and moved the spirit like music.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch44" id="linkch44"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XLIV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ My salary was increased to forty dollars a week. But I seldom drew it. I
+ had plenty of other resources, and what were two broad twenty-dollar gold
+ pieces to a man who had his pockets full of such and a cumbersome
+ abundance of bright half dollars besides? [Paper money has never come into
+ use on the Pacific coast.] Reporting was lucrative, and every man in the
+ town was lavish with his money and his "feet." The city and all the great
+ mountain side were riddled with mining shafts. There were more mines than
+ miners. True, not ten of these mines were yielding rock worth hauling to a
+ mill, but everybody said, "Wait till the shaft gets down where the ledge
+ comes in solid, and then you will see!" So nobody was discouraged. These
+ were nearly all "wild cat" mines, and wholly worthless, but nobody
+ believed it then. The "Ophir," the "Gould &amp; Curry," the "Mexican," and
+ other great mines on the Comstock lead in Virginia and Gold Hill were
+ turning out huge piles of rich rock every day, and every man believed that
+ his little wild cat claim was as good as any on the "main lead" and would
+ infallibly be worth a thousand dollars a foot when he "got down where it
+ came in solid." Poor fellow, he was blessedly blind to the fact that he
+ never would see that day. So the thousand wild cat shafts burrowed deeper
+ and deeper into the earth day by day, and all men were beside themselves
+ with hope and happiness. How they labored, prophesied, exulted! Surely
+ nothing like it was ever seen before since the world began. Every one of
+ these wild cat mines&mdash;not mines, but holes in the ground over
+ imaginary mines&mdash;was incorporated and had handsomely engraved "stock"
+ and the stock was salable, too. It was bought and sold with a feverish
+ avidity in the boards every day. You could go up on the mountain side,
+ scratch around and find a ledge (there was no lack of them), put up a
+ "notice" with a grandiloquent name in it, start a shaft, get your stock
+ printed, and with nothing whatever to prove that your mine was worth a
+ straw, you could put your stock on the market and sell out for hundreds
+ and even thousands of dollars. To make money, and make it fast, was as
+ easy as it was to eat your dinner.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link307" id="link307"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="307.jpg (54K)" src="images/307.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Every man owned "feet" in fifty different wild cat mines and considered
+ his fortune made. Think of a city with not one solitary poor man in it!
+ One would suppose that when month after month went by and still not a wild
+ cat mine (by wild cat I mean, in general terms, any claim not located on
+ the mother vein, i.e., the "Comstock") yielded a ton of rock worth
+ crushing, the people would begin to wonder if they were not putting too
+ much faith in their prospective riches; but there was not a thought of
+ such a thing. They burrowed away, bought and sold, and were happy.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ New claims were taken up daily, and it was the friendly custom to run
+ straight to the newspaper offices, give the reporter forty or fifty
+ "feet," and get them to go and examine the mine and publish a notice of
+ it. They did not care a fig what you said about the property so you said
+ something. Consequently we generally said a word or two to the effect that
+ the "indications" were good, or that the ledge was "six feet wide," or
+ that the rock "resembled the Comstock" (and so it did&mdash;but as a
+ general thing the resemblance was not startling enough to knock you down).
+ If the rock was moderately promising, we followed the custom of the
+ country, used strong adjectives and frothed at the mouth as if a very
+ marvel in silver discoveries had transpired. If the mine was a "developed"
+ one, and had no pay ore to show (and of course it hadn't), we praised the
+ tunnel; said it was one of the most infatuating tunnels in the land;
+ driveled and driveled about the tunnel till we ran entirely out of
+ ecstasies&mdash;but never said a word about the rock. We would squander
+ half a column of adulation on a shaft, or a new wire rope, or a dressed
+ pine windlass, or a fascinating force pump, and close with a burst of
+ admiration of the "gentlemanly and efficient Superintendent" of the mine&mdash;but
+ never utter a whisper about the rock. And those people were always
+ pleased, always satisfied. Occasionally we patched up and varnished our
+ reputation for discrimination and stern, undeviating accuracy, by giving
+ some old abandoned claim a blast that ought to have made its dry bones
+ rattle&mdash;and then somebody would seize it and sell it on the fleeting
+ notoriety thus conferred upon it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There was nothing in the shape of a mining claim that was not salable. We
+ received presents of "feet" every day. If we needed a hundred dollars or
+ so, we sold some; if not, we hoarded it away, satisfied that it would
+ ultimately be worth a thousand dollars a foot. I had a trunk about half
+ full of "stock." When a claim made a stir in the market and went up to a
+ high figure, I searched through my pile to see if I had any of its stock&mdash;and
+ generally found it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The prices rose and fell constantly; but still a fall disturbed us little,
+ because a thousand dollars a foot was our figure, and so we were content
+ to let it fluctuate as much as it pleased till it reached it. My pile of
+ stock was not all given to me by people who wished their claims "noticed."
+ At least half of it was given me by persons who had no thought of such a
+ thing, and looked for nothing more than a simple verbal "thank you;" and
+ you were not even obliged by law to furnish that. If you are coming up the
+ street with a couple of baskets of apples in your hands, and you meet a
+ friend, you naturally invite him to take a few. That describes the
+ condition of things in Virginia in the "flush times." Every man had his
+ pockets full of stock, and it was the actual custom of the country to part
+ with small quantities of it to friends without the asking.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link309" id="link309"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="309.jpg (41K)" src="images/309.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Very often it was a good idea to close the transaction instantly, when a
+ man offered a stock present to a friend, for the offer was only good and
+ binding at that moment, and if the price went to a high figure shortly
+ afterward the procrastination was a thing to be regretted. Mr. Stewart
+ (Senator, now, from Nevada) one day told me he would give me twenty feet
+ of "Justis" stock if I would walk over to his office. It was worth five or
+ ten dollars a foot. I asked him to make the offer good for next day, as I
+ was just going to dinner. He said he would not be in town; so I risked it
+ and took my dinner instead of the stock. Within the week the price went up
+ to seventy dollars and afterward to a hundred and fifty, but nothing could
+ make that man yield. I suppose he sold that stock of mine and placed the
+ guilty proceeds in his own pocket. [My revenge will be found in the
+ accompanying portrait.] I met three friends one afternoon, who said they
+ had been buying "Overman" stock at auction at eight dollars a foot. One
+ said if I would come up to his office he would give me fifteen feet;
+ another said he would add fifteen; the third said he would do the same.
+ But I was going after an inquest and could not stop. A few weeks afterward
+ they sold all their "Overman" at six hundred dollars a foot and generously
+ came around to tell me about it&mdash;and also to urge me to accept of the
+ next forty-five feet of it that people tried to force on me.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link310" id="link310"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="310.jpg (27K)" src="images/310.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ These are actual facts, and I could make the list a long one and still
+ confine myself strictly to the truth. Many a time friends gave us as much
+ as twenty-five feet of stock that was selling at twenty-five dollars a
+ foot, and they thought no more of it than they would of offering a guest a
+ cigar. These were "flush times" indeed! I thought they were going to last
+ always, but somehow I never was much of a prophet.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ To show what a wild spirit possessed the mining brain of the community, I
+ will remark that "claims" were actually "located" in excavations for
+ cellars, where the pick had exposed what seemed to be quartz veins&mdash;and
+ not cellars in the suburbs, either, but in the very heart of the city; and
+ forthwith stock would be issued and thrown on the market. It was small
+ matter who the cellar belonged to&mdash;the "ledge" belonged to the
+ finder, and unless the United States government interfered (inasmuch as
+ the government holds the primary right to mines of the noble metals in
+ Nevada&mdash;or at least did then), it was considered to be his privilege
+ to work it. Imagine a stranger staking out a mining claim among the costly
+ shrubbery in your front yard and calmly proceeding to lay waste the ground
+ with pick and shovel and blasting powder! It has been often done in
+ California. In the middle of one of the principal business streets of
+ Virginia, a man "located" a mining claim and began a shaft on it. He gave
+ me a hundred feet of the stock and I sold it for a fine suit of clothes
+ because I was afraid somebody would fall down the shaft and sue for
+ damages. I owned in another claim that was located in the middle of
+ another street; and to show how absurd people can be, that "East India"
+ stock (as it was called) sold briskly although there was an ancient tunnel
+ running directly under the claim and any man could go into it and see that
+ it did not cut a quartz ledge or anything that remotely resembled one.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One plan of acquiring sudden wealth was to "salt" a wild cat claim and
+ sell out while the excitement was up. The process was simple.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link311" id="link311"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="311.jpg (69K)" src="images/311.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The schemer located a worthless ledge, sunk a shaft on it, bought a wagon
+ load of rich "Comstock" ore, dumped a portion of it into the shaft and
+ piled the rest by its side, above ground. Then he showed the property to a
+ simpleton and sold it to him at a high figure. Of course the wagon load of
+ rich ore was all that the victim ever got out of his purchase. A most
+ remarkable case of "salting" was that of the "North Ophir." It was claimed
+ that this vein was a "remote extension" of the original "Ophir," a
+ valuable mine on the "Comstock." For a few days everybody was talking
+ about the rich developments in the North Ophir. It was said that it
+ yielded perfectly pure silver in small, solid lumps. I went to the place
+ with the owners, and found a shaft six or eight feet deep, in the bottom
+ of which was a badly shattered vein of dull, yellowish, unpromising rock.
+ One would as soon expect to find silver in a grindstone. We got out a pan
+ of the rubbish and washed it in a puddle, and sure enough, among the
+ sediment we found half a dozen black, bullet- looking pellets of
+ unimpeachable "native" silver. Nobody had ever heard of such a thing
+ before; science could not account for such a queer novelty. The stock rose
+ to sixty-five dollars a foot, and at this figure the world-renowned
+ tragedian, McKean Buchanan, bought a commanding interest and prepared to
+ quit the stage once more&mdash;he was always doing that. And then it
+ transpired that the mine had been "salted"&mdash;and not in any hackneyed
+ way, either, but in a singularly bold, barefaced and peculiarly original
+ and outrageous fashion. On one of the lumps of "native" silver was
+ discovered the minted legend, "TED STATES OF," and then it was plainly
+ apparent that the mine had been "salted" with melted half-dollars! The
+ lumps thus obtained had been blackened till they resembled native silver,
+ and were then mixed with the shattered rock in the bottom of the shaft. It
+ is literally true. Of course the price of the stock at once fell to
+ nothing, and the tragedian was ruined. But for this calamity we might have
+ lost McKean Buchanan from the stage.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch45" id="linkch45"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XLV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The "flush times" held bravely on. Something over two years before, Mr.
+ Goodman and another journeyman printer, had borrowed forty dollars and set
+ out from San Francisco to try their fortunes in the new city of Virginia.
+ They found the Territorial Enterprise, a poverty-stricken weekly journal,
+ gasping for breath and likely to die. They bought it, type, fixtures,
+ good-will and all, for a thousand dollars, on long time. The editorial
+ sanctum, news-room, press-room, publication office, bed- chamber, parlor,
+ and kitchen were all compressed into one apartment and it was a small one,
+ too. The editors and printers slept on the floor, a Chinaman did their
+ cooking, and the "imposing-stone" was the general dinner table. But now
+ things were changed. The paper was a great daily, printed by steam; there
+ were five editors and twenty-three compositors; the subscription price was
+ sixteen dollars a year; the advertising rates were exorbitant, and the
+ columns crowded. The paper was clearing from six to ten thousand dollars a
+ month, and the "Enterprise Building" was finished and ready for occupation&mdash;a
+ stately fireproof brick. Every day from five all the way up to eleven
+ columns of "live" advertisements were left out or crowded into spasmodic
+ and irregular "supplements."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The "Gould &amp; Curry" company were erecting a monster hundred-stamp mill
+ at a cost that ultimately fell little short of a million dollars. Gould
+ &amp; Curry stock paid heavy dividends&mdash;a rare thing, and an
+ experience confined to the dozen or fifteen claims located on the "main
+ lead," the "Comstock." The Superintendent of the Gould &amp; Curry lived,
+ rent free, in a fine house built and furnished by the company. He drove a
+ fine pair of horses which were a present from the company, and his salary
+ was twelve thousand dollars a year. The superintendent of another of the
+ great mines traveled in grand state, had a salary of twenty-eight thousand
+ dollars a year, and in a law suit in after days claimed that he was to
+ have had one per cent. on the gross yield of the bullion likewise.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Money was wonderfully plenty. The trouble was, not how to get it,&mdash;but
+ how to spend it, how to lavish it, get rid of it, squander it. And so it
+ was a happy thing that just at this juncture the news came over the wires
+ that a great United States Sanitary Commission had been formed and money
+ was wanted for the relief of the wounded sailors and soldiers of the Union
+ languishing in the Eastern hospitals. Right on the heels of it came word
+ that San Francisco had responded superbly before the telegram was half a
+ day old. Virginia rose as one man! A Sanitary Committee was hurriedly
+ organized, and its chairman mounted a vacant cart in C street and tried to
+ make the clamorous multitude understand that the rest of the committee
+ were flying hither and thither and working with all their might and main,
+ and that if the town would only wait an hour, an office would be ready,
+ books opened, and the Commission prepared to receive contributions. His
+ voice was drowned and his information lost in a ceaseless roar of cheers,
+ and demands that the money be received now&mdash;they swore they would not
+ wait. The chairman pleaded and argued, but, deaf to all entreaty, men
+ plowed their way through the throng and rained checks of gold coin into
+ the cart and skurried away for more. Hands clutching money, were thrust
+ aloft out of the jam by men who hoped this eloquent appeal would cleave a
+ road their strugglings could not open. The very Chinamen and Indians
+ caught the excitement and dashed their half dollars into the cart without
+ knowing or caring what it was all about. Women plunged into the crowd,
+ trimly attired, fought their way to the cart with their coin, and emerged
+ again, by and by, with their apparel in a state of hopeless dilapidation.
+ It was the wildest mob Virginia had ever seen and the most determined and
+ ungovernable; and when at last it abated its fury and dispersed, it had
+ not a penny in its pocket.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link315" id="link315"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="315.jpg (125K)" src="images/315.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ To use its own phraseology, it came there "flush" and went away "busted."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After that, the Commission got itself into systematic working order, and
+ for weeks the contributions flowed into its treasury in a generous stream.
+ Individuals and all sorts of organizations levied upon themselves a
+ regular weekly tax for the sanitary fund, graduated according to their
+ means, and there was not another grand universal outburst till the famous
+ "Sanitary Flour Sack" came our way. Its history is peculiar and
+ interesting. A former schoolmate of mine, by the name of Reuel Gridley,
+ was living at the little city of Austin, in the Reese river country, at
+ this time, and was the Democratic candidate for mayor. He and the
+ Republican candidate made an agreement that the defeated man should be
+ publicly presented with a fifty-pound sack of flour by the successful one,
+ and should carry it home on his shoulder. Gridley was defeated. The new
+ mayor gave him the sack of flour, and he shouldered it and carried it a
+ mile or two, from Lower Austin to his home in Upper Austin, attended by a
+ band of music and the whole population. Arrived there, he said he did not
+ need the flour, and asked what the people thought he had better do with
+ it. A voice said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Sell it to the highest bidder, for the benefit of the Sanitary fund."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The suggestion was greeted with a round of applause, and Gridley mounted a
+ dry-goods box and assumed the role of auctioneer. The bids went higher and
+ higher, as the sympathies of the pioneers awoke and expanded, till at last
+ the sack was knocked down to a mill man at two hundred and fifty dollars,
+ and his check taken. He was asked where he would have the flour delivered,
+ and he said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Nowhere&mdash;sell it again."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Now the cheers went up royally, and the multitude were fairly in the
+ spirit of the thing. So Gridley stood there and shouted and perspired till
+ the sun went down; and when the crowd dispersed he had sold the sack to
+ three hundred different people, and had taken in eight thousand dollars in
+ gold. And still the flour sack was in his possession.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link317" id="link317"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="317.jpg (157K)" src="images/317.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The news came to Virginia, and a telegram went back:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Fetch along your flour sack!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Thirty-six hours afterward Gridley arrived, and an afternoon mass meeting
+ was held in the Opera House, and the auction began. But the sack had come
+ sooner than it was expected; the people were not thoroughly aroused, and
+ the sale dragged. At nightfall only five thousand dollars had been
+ secured, and there was a crestfallen feeling in the community. However,
+ there was no disposition to let the matter rest here and acknowledge
+ vanquishment at the hands of the village of Austin. Till late in the night
+ the principal citizens were at work arranging the morrow's campaign, and
+ when they went to bed they had no fears for the result. At eleven the next
+ morning a procession of open carriages, attended by clamorous bands of
+ music and adorned with a moving display of flags, filed along C street and
+ was soon in danger of blockade by a huzzaing multitude of citizens. In the
+ first carriage sat Gridley, with the flour sack in prominent view, the
+ latter splendid with bright paint and gilt lettering; also in the same
+ carriage sat the mayor and the recorder. The other carriages contained the
+ Common Council, the editors and reporters, and other people of imposing
+ consequence. The crowd pressed to the corner of C and Taylor streets,
+ expecting the sale to begin there, but they were disappointed, and also
+ unspeakably surprised; for the cavalcade moved on as if Virginia had
+ ceased to be of importance, and took its way over the "divide," toward the
+ small town of Gold Hill. Telegrams had gone ahead to Gold Hill, Silver
+ City and Dayton, and those communities were at fever heat and rife for the
+ conflict. It was a very hot day, and wonderfully dusty. At the end of a
+ short half hour we descended into Gold Hill with drums beating and colors
+ flying, and enveloped in imposing clouds of dust. The whole population&mdash;men,
+ women and children, Chinamen and Indians, were massed in the main street,
+ all the flags in town were at the mast head, and the blare of the bands
+ was drowned in cheers. Gridley stood up and asked who would make the first
+ bid for the National Sanitary Flour Sack. Gen. W. said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "The Yellow Jacket silver mining company offers a thousand dollars, coin!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A tempest of applause followed. A telegram carried the news to Virginia,
+ and fifteen minutes afterward that city's population was massed in the
+ streets devouring the tidings&mdash;for it was part of the programme that
+ the bulletin boards should do a good work that day. Every few minutes a
+ new dispatch was bulletined from Gold Hill, and still the excitement grew.
+ Telegrams began to return to us from Virginia beseeching Gridley to bring
+ back the flour sack; but such was not the plan of the campaign. At the end
+ of an hour Gold Hill's small population had paid a figure for the flour
+ sack that awoke all the enthusiasm of Virginia when the grand total was
+ displayed upon the bulletin boards. Then the Gridley cavalcade moved on, a
+ giant refreshed with new lager beer and plenty of it&mdash;for the people
+ brought it to the carriages without waiting to measure it&mdash;and within
+ three hours more the expedition had carried Silver City and Dayton by
+ storm and was on its way back covered with glory. Every move had been
+ telegraphed and bulletined, and as the procession entered Virginia and
+ filed down C street at half past eight in the evening the town was abroad
+ in the thoroughfares, torches were glaring, flags flying, bands playing,
+ cheer on cheer cleaving the air, and the city ready to surrender at
+ discretion. The auction began, every bid was greeted with bursts of
+ applause, and at the end of two hours and a half a population of fifteen
+ thousand souls had paid in coin for a fifty-pound sack of flour a sum
+ equal to forty thousand dollars in greenbacks! It was at a rate in the
+ neighborhood of three dollars for each man, woman and child of the
+ population. The grand total would have been twice as large, but the
+ streets were very narrow, and hundreds who wanted to bid could not get
+ within a block of the stand, and could not make themselves heard. These
+ grew tired of waiting and many of them went home long before the auction
+ was over. This was the greatest day Virginia ever saw, perhaps.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Gridley sold the sack in Carson city and several California towns; also in
+ San Francisco. Then he took it east and sold it in one or two Atlantic
+ cities, I think. I am not sure of that, but I know that he finally carried
+ it to St. Louis, where a monster Sanitary Fair was being held, and after
+ selling it there for a large sum and helping on the enthusiasm by
+ displaying the portly silver bricks which Nevada's donation had produced,
+ he had the flour baked up into small cakes and retailed them at high
+ prices.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was estimated that when the flour sack's mission was ended it had been
+ sold for a grand total of a hundred and fifty thousand dollars in
+ greenbacks! This is probably the only instance on record where common
+ family flour brought three thousand dollars a pound in the public market.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It is due to Mr. Gridley's memory to mention that the expenses of his
+ sanitary flour sack expedition of fifteen thousand miles, going and
+ returning, were paid in large part if not entirely, out of his own pocket.
+ The time he gave to it was not less than three months. Mr. Gridley was a
+ soldier in the Mexican war and a pioneer Californian. He died at Stockton,
+ California, in December, 1870, greatly regretted.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link319" id="link319"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="319.jpg (51K)" src="images/319.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch46" id="linkch46"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XLVI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There were nabobs in those days&mdash;in the "flush times," I mean. Every
+ rich strike in the mines created one or two. I call to mind several of
+ these. They were careless, easy-going fellows, as a general thing, and the
+ community at large was as much benefited by their riches as they were
+ themselves&mdash;possibly more, in some cases.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Two cousins, teamsters, did some hauling for a man and had to take a small
+ segregated portion of a silver mine in lieu of $300 cash. They gave an
+ outsider a third to open the mine, and they went on teaming. But not long.
+ Ten months afterward the mine was out of debt and paying each owner $8,000
+ to $10,000 a month&mdash;say $100,000 a year.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One of the earliest nabobs that Nevada was delivered of wore $6,000 worth
+ of diamonds in his bosom, and swore he was unhappy because he could not
+ spend his money as fast as he made it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Another Nevada nabob boasted an income that often reached $16,000 a month;
+ and he used to love to tell how he had worked in the very mine that
+ yielded it, for five dollars a day, when he first came to the country.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link321" id="link321"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="321.jpg (31K)" src="images/321.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The silver and sage-brush State has knowledge of another of these pets of
+ fortune&mdash;lifted from actual poverty to affluence almost in a single
+ night&mdash;who was able to offer $100,000 for a position of high official
+ distinction, shortly afterward, and did offer it&mdash;but failed to get
+ it, his politics not being as sound as his bank account.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then there was John Smith. He was a good, honest, kind-hearted soul, born
+ and reared in the lower ranks of life, and miraculously ignorant. He drove
+ a team, and owned a small ranch&mdash;a ranch that paid him a comfortable
+ living, for although it yielded but little hay, what little it did yield
+ was worth from $250 to $300 in gold per ton in the market. Presently Smith
+ traded a few acres of the ranch for a small undeveloped silver mine in
+ Gold Hill. He opened the mine and built a little unpretending ten-stamp
+ mill. Eighteen months afterward he retired from the hay business, for his
+ mining income had reached a most comfortable figure. Some people said it
+ was $30,000 a month, and others said it was $60,000. Smith was very rich
+ at any rate.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And then he went to Europe and traveled. And when he came back he was
+ never tired of telling about the fine hogs he had seen in England, and the
+ gorgeous sheep he had seen in Spain, and the fine cattle he had noticed in
+ the vicinity of Rome. He was full of wonders of the old world, and advised
+ everybody to travel. He said a man never imagined what surprising things
+ there were in the world till he had traveled.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One day, on board ship, the passengers made up a pool of $500, which was
+ to be the property of the man who should come nearest to guessing the run
+ of the vessel for the next twenty-four hours. Next day, toward noon, the
+ figures were all in the purser's hands in sealed envelopes. Smith was
+ serene and happy, for he had been bribing the engineer. But another party
+ won the prize! Smith said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Here, that won't do! He guessed two miles wider of the mark than I did."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The purser said, "Mr. Smith, you missed it further than any man on board.
+ We traveled two hundred and eight miles yesterday."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, sir," said Smith, "that's just where I've got you, for I guessed
+ two hundred and nine. If you'll look at my figgers again you'll find a 2
+ and two 0's, which stands for 200, don't it?&mdash;and after 'em you'll
+ find a 9 (2009), which stands for two hundred and nine. I reckon I'll take
+ that money, if you please."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Gould &amp; Curry claim comprised twelve hundred feet, and it all
+ belonged originally to the two men whose names it bears. Mr. Curry owned
+ two thirds of it&mdash;and he said that he sold it out for twenty-five
+ hundred dollars in cash, and an old plug horse that ate up his market
+ value in hay and barley in seventeen days by the watch. And he said that
+ Gould sold out for a pair of second-hand government blankets and a bottle
+ of whisky that killed nine men in three hours, and that an unoffending
+ stranger that smelt the cork was disabled for life. Four years afterward
+ the mine thus disposed of was worth in the San Francisco market seven
+ millions six hundred thousand dollars in gold coin.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In the early days a poverty-stricken Mexican who lived in a canyon
+ directly back of Virginia City, had a stream of water as large as a man's
+ wrist trickling from the hill-side on his premises. The Ophir Company
+ segregated a hundred feet of their mine and traded it to him for the
+ stream of water. The hundred feet proved to be the richest part of the
+ entire mine; four years after the swap, its market value (including its
+ mill) was $1,500,000.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ An individual who owned twenty feet in the Ophir mine before its great
+ riches were revealed to men, traded it for a horse, and a very sorry
+ looking brute he was, too. A year or so afterward, when Ophir stock went
+ up to $3,000 a foot, this man, who had not a cent, used to say he was the
+ most startling example of magnificence and misery the world had ever seen&mdash;because
+ he was able to ride a sixty-thousand-dollar horse&mdash;yet could not
+ scrape up cash enough to buy a saddle, and was obliged to borrow one or
+ ride bareback. He said if fortune were to give him another
+ sixty-thousand-dollar horse it would ruin him.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link323" id="link323"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="323.jpg (46K)" src="images/323.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A youth of nineteen, who was a telegraph operator in Virginia on a salary
+ of a hundred dollars a month, and who, when he could not make out German
+ names in the list of San Francisco steamer arrivals, used to ingeniously
+ select and supply substitutes for them out of an old Berlin city
+ directory, made himself rich by watching the mining telegrams that passed
+ through his hands and buying and selling stocks accordingly, through a
+ friend in San Francisco. Once when a private dispatch was sent from
+ Virginia announcing a rich strike in a prominent mine and advising that
+ the matter be kept secret till a large amount of the stock could be
+ secured, he bought forty "feet" of the stock at twenty dollars a foot, and
+ afterward sold half of it at eight hundred dollars a foot and the rest at
+ double that figure. Within three months he was worth $150,000, and had
+ resigned his telegraphic position.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Another telegraph operator who had been discharged by the company for
+ divulging the secrets of the office, agreed with a moneyed man in San
+ Francisco to furnish him the result of a great Virginia mining lawsuit
+ within an hour after its private reception by the parties to it in San
+ Francisco. For this he was to have a large percentage of the profits on
+ purchases and sales made on it by his fellow-conspirator. So he went,
+ disguised as a teamster, to a little wayside telegraph office in the
+ mountains, got acquainted with the operator, and sat in the office day
+ after day, smoking his pipe, complaining that his team was fagged out and
+ unable to travel&mdash;and meantime listening to the dispatches as they
+ passed clicking through the machine from Virginia. Finally the private
+ dispatch announcing the result of the lawsuit sped over the wires, and as
+ soon as he heard it he telegraphed his friend in San Francisco:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Am tired waiting. Shall sell the team and go home."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was the signal agreed upon. The word "waiting" left out, would have
+ signified that the suit had gone the other way.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The mock teamster's friend picked up a deal of the mining stock, at low
+ figures, before the news became public, and a fortune was the result.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ For a long time after one of the great Virginia mines had been
+ incorporated, about fifty feet of the original location were still in the
+ hands of a man who had never signed the incorporation papers. The stock
+ became very valuable, and every effort was made to find this man, but he
+ had disappeared. Once it was heard that he was in New York, and one or two
+ speculators went east but failed to find him. Once the news came that he
+ was in the Bermudas, and straightway a speculator or two hurried east and
+ sailed for Bermuda&mdash;but he was not there. Finally he was heard of in
+ Mexico, and a friend of his, a bar-keeper on a salary, scraped together a
+ little money and sought him out, bought his "feet" for a hundred dollars,
+ returned and sold the property for $75,000.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But why go on? The traditions of Silverland are filled with instances like
+ these, and I would never get through enumerating them were I to attempt do
+ it. I only desired to give, the reader an idea of a peculiarity of the
+ "flush times" which I could not present so strikingly in any other way,
+ and which some mention of was necessary to a realizing comprehension of
+ the time and the country.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I was personally acquainted with the majority of the nabobs I have
+ referred to, and so, for old acquaintance sake, I have shifted their
+ occupations and experiences around in such a way as to keep the Pacific
+ public from recognizing these once notorious men. No longer notorious, for
+ the majority of them have drifted back into poverty and obscurity again.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In Nevada there used to be current the story of an adventure of two of her
+ nabobs, which may or may not have occurred. I give it for what it is
+ worth:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Col. Jim had seen somewhat of the world, and knew more or less of its
+ ways; but Col. Jack was from the back settlements of the States, had led a
+ life of arduous toil, and had never seen a city. These two, blessed with
+ sudden wealth, projected a visit to New York,&mdash;Col. Jack to see the
+ sights, and Col. Jim to guard his unsophistication from misfortune. They
+ reached San Francisco in the night, and sailed in the morning. Arrived in
+ New York, Col. Jack said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I've heard tell of carriages all my life, and now I mean to have a ride
+ in one; I don't care what it costs. Come along."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ They stepped out on the sidewalk, and Col. Jim called a stylish barouche.
+ But Col. Jack said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No, sir! None of your cheap-John turn-outs for me. I'm here to have a
+ good time, and money ain't any object. I mean to have the nobbiest rig
+ that's going. Now here comes the very trick. Stop that yaller one with the
+ pictures on it&mdash;don't you fret&mdash;I'll stand all the expenses
+ myself."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So Col. Jim stopped an empty omnibus, and they got in. Said Col. Jack:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Ain't it gay, though? Oh, no, I reckon not! Cushions, and windows, and
+ pictures, till you can't rest. What would the boys say if they could see
+ us cutting a swell like this in New York? By George, I wish they could see
+ us."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then he put his head out of the window, and shouted to the driver:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Say, Johnny, this suits me!&mdash;suits yours truly, you bet, you! I want
+ this shebang all day. I'm on it, old man! Let 'em out! Make 'em go! We'll
+ make it all right with you, sonny!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The driver passed his hand through the strap-hole, and tapped for his fare&mdash;it
+ was before the gongs came into common use. Col. Jack took the hand, and
+ shook it cordially. He said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link326" id="link326"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="326.jpg (51K)" src="images/326.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You twig me, old pard! All right between gents. Smell of that, and see
+ how you like it!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And he put a twenty-dollar gold piece in the driver's hand. After a moment
+ the driver said he could not make change.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Bother the change! Ride it out. Put it in your pocket."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then to Col. Jim, with a sounding slap on his thigh:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Ain't it style, though? Hanged if I don't hire this thing every day for a
+ week."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The omnibus stopped, and a young lady got in. Col. Jack stared a moment,
+ then nudged Col. Jim with his elbow:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Don't say a word," he whispered. "Let her ride, if she wants to.
+ Gracious, there's room enough."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The young lady got out her porte-monnaie, and handed her fare to Col.
+ Jack.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "What's this for?" said he.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Give it to the driver, please."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Take back your money, madam. We can't allow it. You're welcome to ride
+ here as long as you please, but this shebang's chartered, and we can't let
+ you pay a cent."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link327" id="link327"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="327.jpg (34K)" src="images/327.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The girl shrunk into a corner, bewildered. An old lady with a basket
+ climbed in, and proffered her fare.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Excuse me," said Col. Jack. "You're perfectly welcome here, madam, but we
+ can't allow you to pay. Set right down there, mum, and don't you be the
+ least uneasy. Make yourself just as free as if you was in your own
+ turn-out."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Within two minutes, three gentlemen, two fat women, and a couple of
+ children, entered.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Come right along, friends," said Col. Jack; "don't mind us. This is a
+ free blow-out." Then he whispered to Col. Jim,
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "New York ain't no sociable place, I don't reckon&mdash;it ain't no name
+ for it!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He resisted every effort to pass fares to the driver, and made everybody
+ cordially welcome. The situation dawned on the people, and they pocketed
+ their money, and delivered themselves up to covert enjoyment of the
+ episode. Half a dozen more passengers entered.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh, there's plenty of room," said Col. Jack. "Walk right in, and make
+ yourselves at home. A blow-out ain't worth anything as a blow-out, unless
+ a body has company." Then in a whisper to Col. Jim: "But ain't these New
+ Yorkers friendly? And ain't they cool about it, too? Icebergs ain't
+ anywhere. I reckon they'd tackle a hearse, if it was going their way."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ More passengers got in; more yet, and still more. Both seats were filled,
+ and a file of men were standing up, holding on to the cleats overhead.
+ Parties with baskets and bundles were climbing up on the roof.
+ Half-suppressed laughter rippled up from all sides.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, for clean, cool, out-and-out cheek, if this don't bang anything
+ that ever I saw, I'm an Injun!" whispered Col. Jack.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A Chinaman crowded his way in.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I weaken!" said Col. Jack. "Hold on, driver! Keep your seats, ladies, and
+ gents. Just make yourselves free&mdash;everything's paid for. Driver,
+ rustle these folks around as long as they're a mind to go&mdash;friends of
+ ours, you know. Take them everywheres&mdash;and if you want more money,
+ come to the St. Nicholas, and we'll make it all right. Pleasant journey to
+ you, ladies and gents&mdash;go it just as long as you please&mdash;it
+ shan't cost you a cent!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link328" id="link328"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="328.jpg (93K)" src="images/328.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The two comrades got out, and Col. Jack said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Jimmy, it's the sociablest place I ever saw. The Chinaman waltzed in as
+ comfortable as anybody. If we'd staid awhile, I reckon we'd had some
+ niggers. B' George, we'll have to barricade our doors to-night, or some of
+ these ducks will be trying to sleep with us."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch47" id="linkch47"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XLVII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Somebody has said that in order to know a community, one must observe the
+ style of its funerals and know what manner of men they bury with most
+ ceremony. I cannot say which class we buried with most eclat in our "flush
+ times," the distinguished public benefactor or the distinguished rough&mdash;possibly
+ the two chief grades or grand divisions of society honored their
+ illustrious dead about equally; and hence, no doubt the philosopher I have
+ quoted from would have needed to see two representative funerals in
+ Virginia before forming his estimate of the people.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There was a grand time over Buck Fanshaw when he died. He was a
+ representative citizen. He had "killed his man"&mdash;not in his own
+ quarrel, it is true, but in defence of a stranger unfairly beset by
+ numbers. He had kept a sumptuous saloon. He had been the proprietor of a
+ dashing helpmeet whom he could have discarded without the formality of a
+ divorce. He had held a high position in the fire department and been a
+ very Warwick in politics. When he died there was great lamentation
+ throughout the town, but especially in the vast bottom-stratum of society.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On the inquest it was shown that Buck Fanshaw, in the delirium of a
+ wasting typhoid fever, had taken arsenic, shot himself through the body,
+ cut his throat, and jumped out of a four-story window and broken his neck&mdash;and
+ after due deliberation, the jury, sad and tearful, but with intelligence
+ unblinded by its sorrow, brought in a verdict of death "by the visitation
+ of God." What could the world do without juries?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Prodigious preparations were made for the funeral. All the vehicles in
+ town were hired, all the saloons put in mourning, all the municipal and
+ fire-company flags hung at half-mast, and all the firemen ordered to
+ muster in uniform and bring their machines duly draped in black. Now&mdash;let
+ us remark in parenthesis&mdash;as all the peoples of the earth had
+ representative adventurers in the Silverland, and as each adventurer had
+ brought the slang of his nation or his locality with him, the combination
+ made the slang of Nevada the richest and the most infinitely varied and
+ copious that had ever existed anywhere in the world, perhaps, except in
+ the mines of California in the "early days." Slang was the language of
+ Nevada. It was hard to preach a sermon without it, and be understood. Such
+ phrases as "You bet!" "Oh, no, I reckon not!" "No Irish need apply," and a
+ hundred others, became so common as to fall from the lips of a speaker
+ unconsciously&mdash;and very often when they did not touch the subject
+ under discussion and consequently failed to mean anything.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After Buck Fanshaw's inquest, a meeting of the short-haired brotherhood
+ was held, for nothing can be done on the Pacific coast without a public
+ meeting and an expression of sentiment. Regretful resolutions were passed
+ and various committees appointed; among others, a committee of one was
+ deputed to call on the minister, a fragile, gentle, spiritual new
+ fledgling from an Eastern theological seminary, and as yet unacquainted
+ with the ways of the mines. The committeeman, "Scotty" Briggs, made his
+ visit; and in after days it was worth something to hear the minister tell
+ about it. Scotty was a stalwart rough, whose customary suit, when on
+ weighty official business, like committee work, was a fire helmet, flaming
+ red flannel shirt, patent leather belt with spanner and revolver attached,
+ coat hung over arm, and pants stuffed into boot tops. He formed something
+ of a contrast to the pale theological student. It is fair to say of
+ Scotty, however, in passing, that he had a warm heart, and a strong love
+ for his friends, and never entered into a quarrel when he could reasonably
+ keep out of it. Indeed, it was commonly said that whenever one of Scotty's
+ fights was investigated, it always turned out that it had originally been
+ no affair of his, but that out of native good-heartedness he had dropped
+ in of his own accord to help the man who was getting the worst of it. He
+ and Buck Fanshaw were bosom friends, for years, and had often taken
+ adventurous "pot-luck" together. On one occasion, they had thrown off
+ their coats and taken the weaker side in a fight among strangers, and
+ after gaining a hard-earned victory, turned and found that the men they
+ were helping had deserted early, and not only that, but had stolen their
+ coats and made off with them! But to return to Scotty's visit to the
+ minister. He was on a sorrowful mission, now, and his face was the picture
+ of woe. Being admitted to the presence he sat down before the clergyman,
+ placed his fire-hat on an unfinished manuscript sermon under the
+ minister's nose, took from it a red silk handkerchief, wiped his brow and
+ heaved a sigh of dismal impressiveness, explanatory of his business.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He choked, and even shed tears; but with an effort he mastered his voice
+ and said in lugubrious tones:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Are you the duck that runs the gospel-mill next door?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Am I the&mdash;pardon me, I believe I do not understand?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ With another sigh and a half-sob, Scotty rejoined:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why you see we are in a bit of trouble, and the boys thought maybe you
+ would give us a lift, if we'd tackle you&mdash;that is, if I've got the
+ rights of it and you are the head clerk of the doxology-works next door."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I am the shepherd in charge of the flock whose fold is next door."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "The which?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "The spiritual adviser of the little company of believers whose sanctuary
+ adjoins these premises."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link331" id="link331"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="331.jpg (76K)" src="images/331.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Scotty scratched his head, reflected a moment, and then said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You ruther hold over me, pard. I reckon I can't call that hand. Ante and
+ pass the buck."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "How? I beg pardon. What did I understand you to say?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, you've ruther got the bulge on me. Or maybe we've both got the
+ bulge, somehow. You don't smoke me and I don't smoke you. You see, one of
+ the boys has passed in his checks and we want to give him a good send-
+ off, and so the thing I'm on now is to roust out somebody to jerk a little
+ chin-music for us and waltz him through handsome."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "My friend, I seem to grow more and more bewildered. Your observations are
+ wholly incomprehensible to me. Cannot you simplify them in some way? At
+ first I thought perhaps I understood you, but I grope now. Would it not
+ expedite matters if you restricted yourself to categorical statements of
+ fact unencumbered with obstructing accumulations of metaphor and
+ allegory?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Another pause, and more reflection. Then, said Scotty:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I'll have to pass, I judge."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "How?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You've raised me out, pard."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I still fail to catch your meaning."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why, that last lead of yourn is too many for me&mdash;that's the idea. I
+ can't neither-trump nor follow suit."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The clergyman sank back in his chair perplexed. Scotty leaned his head on
+ his hand and gave himself up to thought.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Presently his face came up, sorrowful but confident.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I've got it now, so's you can savvy," he said. "What we want is a
+ gospel-sharp. See?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "A what?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gospel-sharp. Parson."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh! Why did you not say so before? I am a clergyman&mdash;a parson."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Now you talk! You see my blind and straddle it like a man. Put it there!"&mdash;extending
+ a brawny paw, which closed over the minister's small hand and gave it a
+ shake indicative of fraternal sympathy and fervent gratification.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Now we're all right, pard. Let's start fresh. Don't you mind my snuffling
+ a little&mdash;becuz we're in a power of trouble. You see, one of the boys
+ has gone up the flume&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gone where?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Up the flume&mdash;throwed up the sponge, you understand."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Thrown up the sponge?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Yes&mdash;kicked the bucket&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Ah&mdash;has departed to that mysterious country from whose bourne no
+ traveler returns."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Return! I reckon not. Why pard, he's dead!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Yes, I understand."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh, you do? Well I thought maybe you might be getting tangled some more.
+ Yes, you see he's dead again&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Again? Why, has he ever been dead before?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Dead before? No! Do you reckon a man has got as many lives as a cat? But
+ you bet you he's awful dead now, poor old boy, and I wish I'd never seen
+ this day. I don't want no better friend than Buck Fanshaw. I knowed him by
+ the back; and when I know a man and like him, I freeze to him&mdash;you
+ hear me. Take him all round, pard, there never was a bullier man in the
+ mines. No man ever knowed Buck Fanshaw to go back on a friend. But it's
+ all up, you know, it's all up. It ain't no use. They've scooped him."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Scooped him?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Yes&mdash;death has. Well, well, well, we've got to give him up. Yes
+ indeed. It's a kind of a hard world, after all, ain't it? But pard, he was
+ a rustler! You ought to seen him get started once. He was a bully boy with
+ a glass eye! Just spit in his face and give him room according to his
+ strength, and it was just beautiful to see him peel and go in. He was the
+ worst son of a thief that ever drawed breath. Pard, he was on it! He was
+ on it bigger than an Injun!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "On it? On what?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "On the shoot. On the shoulder. On the fight, you understand. He didn't
+ give a continental for any body. Beg your pardon, friend, for coming so
+ near saying a cuss-word&mdash;but you see I'm on an awful strain, in this
+ palaver, on account of having to cramp down and draw everything so mild.
+ But we've got to give him up. There ain't any getting around that, I don't
+ reckon. Now if we can get you to help plant him&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Preach the funeral discourse? Assist at the obsequies?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Obs'quies is good. Yes. That's it&mdash;that's our little game. We are
+ going to get the thing up regardless, you know. He was always nifty
+ himself, and so you bet you his funeral ain't going to be no slouch&mdash;solid
+ silver door-plate on his coffin, six plumes on the hearse, and a nigger on
+ the box in a biled shirt and a plug hat&mdash;how's that for high? And
+ we'll take care of you, pard. We'll fix you all right. There'll be a
+ kerridge for you; and whatever you want, you just 'scape out and we'll
+ 'tend to it. We've got a shebang fixed up for you to stand behind, in No.
+ 1's house, and don't you be afraid. Just go in and toot your horn, if you
+ don't sell a clam. Put Buck through as bully as you can, pard, for anybody
+ that knowed him will tell you that he was one of the whitest men that was
+ ever in the mines. You can't draw it too strong. He never could stand it
+ to see things going wrong. He's done more to make this town quiet and
+ peaceable than any man in it. I've seen him lick four Greasers in eleven
+ minutes, myself. If a thing wanted regulating, he warn't a man to go
+ browsing around after somebody to do it, but he would prance in and
+ regulate it himself. He warn't a Catholic. Scasely. He was down on 'em.
+ His word was, 'No Irish need apply!' But it didn't make no difference
+ about that when it came down to what a man's rights was&mdash;and so, when
+ some roughs jumped the Catholic bone-yard and started in to stake out
+ town-lots in it he went for 'em! And he cleaned 'em, too! I was there,
+ pard, and I seen it myself."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link335" id="link335"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="335.jpg (105K)" src="images/335.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "That was very well indeed&mdash;at least the impulse was&mdash;whether
+ the act was strictly defensible or not. Had deceased any religious
+ convictions? That is to say, did he feel a dependence upon, or acknowledge
+ allegiance to a higher power?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ More reflection.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I reckon you've stumped me again, pard. Could you say it over once more,
+ and say it slow?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, to simplify it somewhat, was he, or rather had he ever been
+ connected with any organization sequestered from secular concerns and
+ devoted to self-sacrifice in the interests of morality?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "All down but nine&mdash;set 'em up on the other alley, pard."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "What did I understand you to say?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why, you're most too many for me, you know. When you get in with your
+ left I hunt grass every time. Every time you draw, you fill; but I don't
+ seem to have any luck. Lets have a new deal."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "How? Begin again?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "That's it."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Very well. Was he a good man, and&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "There&mdash;I see that; don't put up another chip till I look at my hand.
+ A good man, says you? Pard, it ain't no name for it. He was the best man
+ that ever&mdash;pard, you would have doted on that man. He could lam any
+ galoot of his inches in America. It was him that put down the riot last
+ election before it got a start; and everybody said he was the only man
+ that could have done it. He waltzed in with a spanner in one hand and a
+ trumpet in the other, and sent fourteen men home on a shutter in less than
+ three minutes. He had that riot all broke up and prevented nice before
+ anybody ever got a chance to strike a blow. He was always for peace, and
+ he would have peace&mdash;he could not stand disturbances. Pard, he was a
+ great loss to this town. It would please the boys if you could chip in
+ something like that and do him justice. Here once when the Micks got to
+ throwing stones through the Methodis' Sunday school windows, Buck Fanshaw,
+ all of his own notion, shut up his saloon and took a couple of
+ six-shooters and mounted guard over the Sunday school. Says he, 'No Irish
+ need apply!' And they didn't. He was the bulliest man in the mountains,
+ pard! He could run faster, jump higher, hit harder, and hold more
+ tangle-foot whisky without spilling it than any man in seventeen counties.
+ Put that in, pard&mdash;it'll please the boys more than anything you could
+ say. And you can say, pard, that he never shook his mother."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link337" id="link337"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="337.jpg (60K)" src="images/337.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Never shook his mother?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "That's it&mdash;any of the boys will tell you so."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, but why should he shake her?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "That's what I say&mdash;but some people does."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Not people of any repute?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, some that averages pretty so-so."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "In my opinion the man that would offer personal violence to his own
+ mother, ought to&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Cheese it, pard; you've banked your ball clean outside the string. What I
+ was a drivin' at, was, that he never throwed off on his mother&mdash;don't
+ you see? No indeedy. He give her a house to live in, and town lots, and
+ plenty of money; and he looked after her and took care of her all the
+ time; and when she was down with the small-pox I'm d&mdash;-d if he didn't
+ set up nights and nuss her himself! Beg your pardon for saying it, but it
+ hopped out too quick for yours truly.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You've treated me like a gentleman, pard, and I ain't the man to hurt
+ your feelings intentional. I think you're white. I think you're a square
+ man, pard. I like you, and I'll lick any man that don't. I'll lick him
+ till he can't tell himself from a last year's corpse! Put it there!"
+ [Another fraternal hand-shake&mdash;and exit.]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The obsequies were all that "the boys" could desire. Such a marvel of
+ funeral pomp had never been seen in Virginia. The plumed hearse, the
+ dirge-breathing brass bands, the closed marts of business, the flags
+ drooping at half mast, the long, plodding procession of uniformed secret
+ societies, military battalions and fire companies, draped engines,
+ carriages of officials, and citizens in vehicles and on foot, attracted
+ multitudes of spectators to the sidewalks, roofs and windows; and for
+ years afterward, the degree of grandeur attained by any civic display in
+ Virginia was determined by comparison with Buck Fanshaw's funeral.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Scotty Briggs, as a pall-bearer and a mourner, occupied a prominent place
+ at the funeral, and when the sermon was finished and the last sentence of
+ the prayer for the dead man's soul ascended, he responded, in a low voice,
+ but with feelings:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "AMEN. No Irish need apply."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ As the bulk of the response was without apparent relevancy, it was
+ probably nothing more than a humble tribute to the memory of the friend
+ that was gone; for, as Scotty had once said, it was "his word."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Scotty Briggs, in after days, achieved the distinction of becoming the
+ only convert to religion that was ever gathered from the Virginia roughs;
+ and it transpired that the man who had it in him to espouse the quarrel of
+ the weak out of inborn nobility of spirit was no mean timber whereof to
+ construct a Christian. The making him one did not warp his generosity or
+ diminish his courage; on the contrary it gave intelligent direction to the
+ one and a broader field to the other.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ If his Sunday-school class progressed faster than the other classes, was
+ it matter for wonder? I think not. He talked to his pioneer small-fry in a
+ language they understood! It was my large privilege, a month before he
+ died, to hear him tell the beautiful story of Joseph and his brethren to
+ his class "without looking at the book." I leave it to the reader to fancy
+ what it was like, as it fell, riddled with slang, from the lips of that
+ grave, earnest teacher, and was listened to by his little learners with a
+ consuming interest that showed that they were as unconscious as he was
+ that any violence was being done to the sacred proprieties!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link338" id="link338"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="338.jpg (52K)" src="images/338.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch48" id="linkch48"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XLVIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The first twenty-six graves in the Virginia cemetery were occupied by
+ murdered men. So everybody said, so everybody believed, and so they will
+ always say and believe. The reason why there was so much slaughtering
+ done, was, that in a new mining district the rough element predominates,
+ and a person is not respected until he has "killed his man." That was the
+ very expression used.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ If an unknown individual arrived, they did not inquire if he was capable,
+ honest, industrious, but&mdash;had he killed his man? If he had not, he
+ gravitated to his natural and proper position, that of a man of small
+ consequence; if he had, the cordiality of his reception was graduated
+ according to the number of his dead. It was tedious work struggling up to
+ a position of influence with bloodless hands; but when a man came with the
+ blood of half a dozen men on his soul, his worth was recognized at once
+ and his acquaintance sought.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In Nevada, for a time, the lawyer, the editor, the banker, the chief
+ desperado, the chief gambler, and the saloon keeper, occupied the same
+ level in society, and it was the highest. The cheapest and easiest way to
+ become an influential man and be looked up to by the community at large,
+ was to stand behind a bar, wear a cluster-diamond pin, and sell whisky. I
+ am not sure but that the saloon-keeper held a shade higher rank than any
+ other member of society. His opinion had weight. It was his privilege to
+ say how the elections should go. No great movement could succeed without
+ the countenance and direction of the saloon- keepers. It was a high favor
+ when the chief saloon-keeper consented to serve in the legislature or the
+ board of aldermen.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Youthful ambition hardly aspired so much to the honors of the law, or the
+ army and navy as to the dignity of proprietorship in a saloon.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ To be a saloon-keeper and kill a man was to be illustrious. Hence the
+ reader will not be surprised to learn that more than one man was killed in
+ Nevada under hardly the pretext of provocation, so impatient was the
+ slayer to achieve reputation and throw off the galling sense of being held
+ in indifferent repute by his associates. I knew two youths who tried to
+ "kill their men" for no other reason&mdash;and got killed themselves for
+ their pains. "There goes the man that killed Bill Adams" was higher praise
+ and a sweeter sound in the ears of this sort of people than any other
+ speech that admiring lips could utter.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link340" id="link340"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="340.jpg (115K)" src="images/340.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The men who murdered Virginia's original twenty-six cemetery-occupants
+ were never punished. Why? Because Alfred the Great, when he invented trial
+ by jury and knew that he had admirably framed it to secure justice in his
+ age of the world, was not aware that in the nineteenth century the
+ condition of things would be so entirely changed that unless he rose from
+ the grave and altered the jury plan to meet the emergency, it would prove
+ the most ingenious and infallible agency for defeating justice that human
+ wisdom could contrive. For how could he imagine that we simpletons would
+ go on using his jury plan after circumstances had stripped it of its
+ usefulness, any more than he could imagine that we would go on using his
+ candle-clock after we had invented chronometers? In his day news could not
+ travel fast, and hence he could easily find a jury of honest, intelligent
+ men who had not heard of the case they were called to try&mdash;but in our
+ day of telegraphs and newspapers his plan compels us to swear in juries
+ composed of fools and rascals, because the system rigidly excludes honest
+ men and men of brains.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I remember one of those sorrowful farces, in Virginia, which we call a
+ jury trial. A noted desperado killed Mr. B., a good citizen, in the most
+ wanton and cold-blooded way. Of course the papers were full of it, and all
+ men capable of reading, read about it. And of course all men not deaf and
+ dumb and idiotic, talked about it. A jury-list was made out, and Mr. B.
+ L., a prominent banker and a valued citizen, was questioned precisely as
+ he would have been questioned in any court in America:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Have you heard of this homicide?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Yes."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Have you held conversations upon the subject?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Yes."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Have you formed or expressed opinions about it?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Yes."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Have you read the newspaper accounts of it?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Yes."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "We do not want you."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A minister, intelligent, esteemed, and greatly respected; a merchant of
+ high character and known probity; a mining superintendent of intelligence
+ and unblemished reputation; a quartz mill owner of excellent standing,
+ were all questioned in the same way, and all set aside. Each said the
+ public talk and the newspaper reports had not so biased his mind but that
+ sworn testimony would overthrow his previously formed opinions and enable
+ him to render a verdict without prejudice and in accordance with the
+ facts. But of course such men could not be trusted with the case.
+ Ignoramuses alone could mete out unsullied justice.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When the peremptory challenges were all exhausted, a jury of twelve men
+ was impaneled&mdash;a jury who swore they had neither heard, read, talked
+ about nor expressed an opinion concerning a murder which the very cattle
+ in the corrals, the Indians in the sage-brush and the stones in the
+ streets were cognizant of! It was a jury composed of two desperadoes, two
+ low beer-house politicians, three bar-keepers, two ranchmen who could not
+ read, and three dull, stupid, human donkeys! It actually came out
+ afterward, that one of these latter thought that incest and arson were the
+ same thing.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link342" id="link342"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="342.jpg (52K)" src="images/342.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The verdict rendered by this jury was, Not Guilty. What else could one
+ expect?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The jury system puts a ban upon intelligence and honesty, and a premium
+ upon ignorance, stupidity and perjury. It is a shame that we must continue
+ to use a worthless system because it was good a thousand years ago. In
+ this age, when a gentleman of high social standing, intelligence and
+ probity, swears that testimony given under solemn oath will outweigh, with
+ him, street talk and newspaper reports based upon mere hearsay, he is
+ worth a hundred jurymen who will swear to their own ignorance and
+ stupidity, and justice would be far safer in his hands than in theirs. Why
+ could not the jury law be so altered as to give men of brains and honesty
+ and equal chance with fools and miscreants? Is it right to show the
+ present favoritism to one class of men and inflict a disability on
+ another, in a land whose boast is that all its citizens are free and
+ equal? I am a candidate for the legislature. I desire to tamper with the
+ jury law. I wish to so alter it as to put a premium on intelligence and
+ character, and close the jury box against idiots, blacklegs, and people
+ who do not read newspapers. But no doubt I shall be defeated&mdash;every
+ effort I make to save the country "misses fire."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ My idea, when I began this chapter, was to say something about
+ desperadoism in the "flush times" of Nevada. To attempt a portrayal of
+ that era and that land, and leave out the blood and carnage, would be like
+ portraying Mormondom and leaving out polygamy. The desperado stalked the
+ streets with a swagger graded according to the number of his homicides,
+ and a nod of recognition from him was sufficient to make a humble admirer
+ happy for the rest of the day. The deference that was paid to a desperado
+ of wide reputation, and who "kept his private graveyard," as the phrase
+ went, was marked, and cheerfully accorded. When he moved along the
+ sidewalk in his excessively long-tailed frock- coat, shiny stump-toed
+ boots, and with dainty little slouch hat tipped over left eye, the
+ small-fry roughs made room for his majesty; when he entered the
+ restaurant, the waiters deserted bankers and merchants to overwhelm him
+ with obsequious service; when he shouldered his way to a bar, the
+ shouldered parties wheeled indignantly, recognized him, and&mdash;apologized.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ They got a look in return that froze their marrow, and by that time a
+ curled and breast-pinned bar keeper was beaming over the counter, proud of
+ the established acquaintanceship that permitted such a familiar form of
+ speech as:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "How're ye, Billy, old fel? Glad to see you. What'll you take&mdash;the
+ old thing?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The "old thing" meant his customary drink, of course.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link344" id="link344"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="344.jpg (47K)" src="images/344.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The best known names in the Territory of Nevada were those belonging to
+ these long-tailed heroes of the revolver. Orators, Governors, capitalists
+ and leaders of the legislature enjoyed a degree of fame, but it seemed
+ local and meagre when contrasted with the fame of such men as Sam Brown,
+ Jack Williams, Billy Mulligan, Farmer Pease, Sugarfoot Mike, Pock Marked
+ Jake, El Dorado Johnny, Jack McNabb, Joe McGee, Jack Harris, Six-fingered
+ Pete, etc., etc. There was a long list of them. They were brave, reckless
+ men, and traveled with their lives in their hands. To give them their due,
+ they did their killing principally among themselves, and seldom molested
+ peaceable citizens, for they considered it small credit to add to their
+ trophies so cheap a bauble as the death of a man who was "not on the
+ shoot," as they phrased it. They killed each other on slight provocation,
+ and hoped and expected to be killed themselves&mdash;for they held it
+ almost shame to die otherwise than "with their boots on," as they
+ expressed it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I remember an instance of a desperado's contempt for such small game as a
+ private citizen's life. I was taking a late supper in a restaurant one
+ night, with two reporters and a little printer named&mdash;Brown, for
+ instance&mdash;any name will do. Presently a stranger with a long-tailed
+ coat on came in, and not noticing Brown's hat, which was lying in a chair,
+ sat down on it. Little Brown sprang up and became abusive in a moment. The
+ stranger smiled, smoothed out the hat, and offered it to Brown with
+ profuse apologies couched in caustic sarcasm, and begged Brown not to
+ destroy him. Brown threw off his coat and challenged the man to fight&mdash;abused
+ him, threatened him, impeached his courage, and urged and even implored
+ him to fight; and in the meantime the smiling stranger placed himself
+ under our protection in mock distress. But presently he assumed a serious
+ tone, and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Very well, gentlemen, if we must fight, we must, I suppose. But don't
+ rush into danger and then say I gave you no warning. I am more than a
+ match for all of you when I get started. I will give you proofs, and then
+ if my friend here still insists, I will try to accommodate him."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The table we were sitting at was about five feet long, and unusually
+ cumbersome and heavy. He asked us to put our hands on the dishes and hold
+ them in their places a moment&mdash;one of them was a large oval dish with
+ a portly roast on it. Then he sat down, tilted up one end of the table,
+ set two of the legs on his knees, took the end of the table between his
+ teeth, took his hands away, and pulled down with his teeth till the table
+ came up to a level position, dishes and all! He said he could lift a keg
+ of nails with his teeth. He picked up a common glass tumbler and bit a
+ semi-circle out of it. Then he opened his bosom and showed us a net-work
+ of knife and bullet scars; showed us more on his arms and face, and said
+ he believed he had bullets enough in his body to make a pig of lead. He
+ was armed to the teeth. He closed with the remark that he was Mr.&mdash;&mdash;of
+ Cariboo&mdash;a celebrated name whereat we shook in our shoes. I would
+ publish the name, but for the suspicion that he might come and carve me.
+ He finally inquired if Brown still thirsted for blood. Brown turned the
+ thing over in his mind a moment, and then&mdash;asked him to supper.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link346" id="link346"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="346.jpg (73K)" src="images/346.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ With the permission of the reader, I will group together, in the next
+ chapter, some samples of life in our small mountain village in the old
+ days of desperadoism. I was there at the time. The reader will observe
+ peculiarities in our official society; and he will observe also, an
+ instance of how, in new countries, murders breed murders.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch49" id="linkch49"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER XLIX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ An extract or two from the newspapers of the day will furnish a photograph
+ that can need no embellishment:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ FATAL SHOOTING AFFRAY.&mdash;An affray occurred, last evening, in a
+ billiard saloon on C street, between Deputy Marshal Jack Williams and
+ Wm. Brown, which resulted in the immediate death of the latter. There
+ had been some difficulty between the parties for several months.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ An inquest was immediately held, and the following testimony adduced:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Officer GEO. BIRDSALL, sworn, says:&mdash;I was told Wm. Brown was drunk
+ and was looking for Jack Williams; so soon as I heard that I started for
+ the parties to prevent a collision; went into the billiard saloon; saw
+ Billy Brown running around, saying if anybody had anything against him
+ to show cause; he was talking in a boisterous manner, and officer Perry
+ took him to the other end of the room to talk to him; Brown came back to
+ me; remarked to me that he thought he was as good as anybody, and knew
+ how to take care of himself; he passed by me and went to the bar; don't
+ know whether he drank or not; Williams was at the end of the
+ billiard-table, next to the stairway; Brown, after going to the bar,
+ came back and said he was as good as any man in the world; he had then
+ walked out to the end of the first billiard-table from the bar; I moved
+ closer to them, supposing there would be a fight; as Brown drew his
+ pistol I caught hold of it; he had fired one shot at Williams; don't
+ know the effect of it; caught hold of him with one hand, and took hold
+ of the pistol and turned it up; think he fired once after I caught hold
+ of the pistol; I wrenched the pistol from him; walked to the end of the
+ billiard-table and told a party that I had Brown's pistol, and to stop
+ shooting; I think four shots were fired in all; after walking out, Mr.
+ Foster remarked that Brown was shot dead.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ Oh, there was no excitement about it&mdash;he merely "remarked" the small
+ circumstance!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Four months later the following item appeared in the same paper (the
+ Enterprise). In this item the name of one of the city officers above
+ referred to (Deputy Marshal Jack Williams) occurs again:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ ROBBERY AND DESPERATE AFFRAY.&mdash;On Tuesday night, a German named
+ Charles Hurtzal, engineer in a mill at Silver City, came to this place,
+ and visited the hurdy-gurdy house on B street. The music, dancing and
+ Teutonic maidens awakened memories of Faderland until our German friend
+ was carried away with rapture. He evidently had money, and was spending
+ if freely. Late in the evening Jack Williams and Andy Blessington
+ invited him down stairs to take a cup of coffee. Williams proposed a
+ game of cards and went up stairs to procure a deck, but not finding any
+ returned. On the stairway he met the German, and drawing his pistol
+ knocked him down and rifled his pockets of some seventy dollars. Hurtzal
+ dared give no alarm, as he was told, with a pistol at his head, if he
+ made any noise or exposed them, they would blow his brains out. So
+ effectually was he frightened that he made no complaint, until his
+ friends forced him. Yesterday a warrant was issued, but the culprits had
+ disappeared.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ This efficient city officer, Jack Williams, had the common reputation of
+ being a burglar, a highwayman and a desperado. It was said that he had
+ several times drawn his revolver and levied money contributions on
+ citizens at dead of night in the public streets of Virginia.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Five months after the above item appeared, Williams was assassinated while
+ sitting at a card table one night; a gun was thrust through the crack of
+ the door and Williams dropped from his chair riddled with balls. It was
+ said, at the time, that Williams had been for some time aware that a party
+ of his own sort (desperadoes) had sworn away his life; and it was
+ generally believed among the people that Williams's friends and enemies
+ would make the assassination memorable&mdash;and useful, too&mdash;by a
+ wholesale destruction of each other.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It did not so happen, but still, times were not dull during the next
+ twenty-four hours, for within that time a woman was killed by a pistol
+ shot, a man was brained with a slung shot, and a man named Reeder was also
+ disposed of permanently. Some matters in the Enterprise account of the
+ killing of Reeder are worth nothing&mdash;especially the accommodating
+ complaisance of a Virginia justice of the peace. The italics in the
+ following narrative are mine:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ MORE CUTTING AND SHOOTING.&mdash;The devil seems to have again broken
+ loose in our town. Pistols and guns explode and knives gleam in our
+ streets as in early times. When there has been a long season of quiet,
+ people are slow to wet their hands in blood; but once blood is spilled,
+ cutting and shooting come easy. Night before last Jack Williams was
+ assassinated, and yesterday forenoon we had more bloody work, growing
+ out of the killing of Williams, and on the same street in which he met
+ his death. It appears that Tom Reeder, a friend of Williams, and George
+ Gumbert were talking, at the meat market of the latter, about the
+ killing of Williams the previous night, when Reeder said it was a most
+ cowardly act to shoot a man in such a way, giving him "no show." Gumbert
+ said that Williams had "as good a show as he gave Billy Brown," meaning
+ the man killed by Williams last March. Reeder said it was a d&mdash;-d
+ lie, that Williams had no show at all. At this, Gumbert drew a knife and
+ stabbed Reeder, cutting him in two places in the back. One stroke of the
+ knife cut into the sleeve of Reeder's coat and passed downward in a
+ slanting direction through his clothing, and entered his body at the
+ small of the back; another blow struck more squarely, and made a much
+ more dangerous wound. Gumbert gave himself up to the officers of
+ justice, and was shortly after discharged by Justice Atwill, on his own
+ recognizance, to appear for trial at six o'clock in the evening. In the
+ meantime Reeder had been taken into the office of Dr. Owens, where his
+ wounds were properly dressed. One of his wounds was considered quite
+ dangerous, and it was thought by many that it would prove fatal. But
+ being considerably under the influence of liquor, Reeder did not feel
+ his wounds as he otherwise would, and he got up and went into the
+ street. He went to the meat market and renewed his quarrel with Gumbert,
+ threatening his life. Friends tried to interfere to put a stop to the
+ quarrel and get the parties away from each other. In the Fashion Saloon
+ Reeder made threats against the life of Gumbert, saying he would kill
+ him, and it is said that he requested the officers not to arrest
+ Gumbert, as he intended to kill him. After these threats Gumbert went
+ off and procured a double- barreled shot gun, loaded with buck-shot or
+ revolver balls, and went after Reeder. Two or three persons were
+ assisting him along the street, trying to get him home, and had him just
+ in front of the store of Klopstock &amp; Harris, when Gumbert came
+ across toward him from the opposite side of the street with his gun. He
+ came up within about ten or fifteen feet of Reeder, and called out to
+ those with him to "look out! get out of the way!" and they had only time
+ to heed the warning, when he fired. Reeder was at the time attempting to
+ screen himself behind a large cask, which stood against the awning post
+ of Klopstock &amp; Harris's store, but some of the balls took effect in
+ the lower part of his breast, and he reeled around forward and fell in
+ front of the cask. Gumbert then raised his gun and fired the second
+ barrel, which missed Reeder and entered the ground. At the time that
+ this occurred, there were a great many persons on the street in the
+ vicinity, and a number of them called out to Gumbert, when they saw him
+ raise his gun, to "hold on," and "don't shoot!" The cutting took place
+ about ten o'clock and the shooting about twelve. After the shooting the
+ street was instantly crowded with the inhabitants of that part of the
+ town, some appearing much excited and laughing&mdash;declaring that it
+ looked like the "good old times of '60." Marshal Perry and officer
+ Birdsall were near when the shooting occurred, and Gumbert was
+ immediately arrested and his gun taken from him, when he was marched off
+ to jail. Many persons who were attracted to the spot where this bloody
+ work had just taken place, looked bewildered and seemed to be asking
+ themselves what was to happen next, appearing in doubt as to whether the
+ killing mania had reached its climax, or whether we were to turn in and
+ have a grand killing spell, shooting whoever might have given us
+ offence. It was whispered around that it was not all over yet&mdash;five
+ or six more were to be killed before night. Reeder was taken to the
+ Virginia City Hotel, and doctors called in to examine his wounds. They
+ found that two or three balls had entered his right side; one of them
+ appeared to have passed through the substance of the lungs, while
+ another passed into the liver. Two balls were also found to have struck
+ one of his legs. As some of the balls struck the cask, the wounds in
+ Reeder's leg were probably from these, glancing downwards, though they
+ might have been caused by the second shot fired. After being shot,
+ Reeder said when he got on his feet&mdash;smiling as he spoke&mdash;"It
+ will take better shooting than that to kill me." The doctors consider it
+ almost impossible for him to recover, but as he has an excellent
+ constitution he may survive, notwithstanding the number and dangerous
+ character of the wounds he has received. The town appears to be
+ perfectly quiet at present, as though the late stormy times had cleared
+ our moral atmosphere; but who can tell in what quarter clouds are
+ lowering or plots ripening?
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ Reeder&mdash;or at least what was left of him&mdash;survived his wounds
+ two days! Nothing was ever done with Gumbert.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Trial by jury is the palladium of our liberties. I do not know what a
+ palladium is, having never seen a palladium, but it is a good thing no
+ doubt at any rate. Not less than a hundred men have been murdered in
+ Nevada&mdash;perhaps I would be within bounds if I said three hundred&mdash;and
+ as far as I can learn, only two persons have suffered the death penalty
+ there. However, four or five who had no money and no political influence
+ have been punished by imprisonment&mdash;one languished in prison as much
+ as eight months, I think. However, I do not desire to be extravagant&mdash;it
+ may have been less.
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ However, one prophecy was verified, at any rate. It was asserted by the
+ desperadoes that one of their brethren (Joe McGee, a special policeman)
+ was known to be the conspirator chosen by lot to assassinate Williams;
+ and they also asserted that doom had been pronounced against McGee, and
+ that he would be assassinated in exactly the same manner that had been
+ adopted for the destruction of Williams&mdash;a prophecy which came true
+ a year later. After twelve months of distress (for McGee saw a fancied
+ assassin in every man that approached him), he made the last of many
+ efforts to get out of the country unwatched. He went to Carson and sat
+ down in a saloon to wait for the stage&mdash;it would leave at four in
+ the morning. But as the night waned and the crowd thinned, he grew
+ uneasy, and told the bar-keeper that assassins were on his track. The
+ bar-keeper told him to stay in the middle of the room, then, and not go
+ near the door, or the window by the stove. But a fatal fascination
+ seduced him to the neighborhood of the stove every now and then, and
+ repeatedly the bar- keeper brought him back to the middle of the room
+ and warned him to remain there. But he could not. At three in the
+ morning he again returned to the stove and sat down by a stranger.
+ Before the bar-keeper could get to him with another warning whisper,
+ some one outside fired through the window and riddled McGee's breast
+ with slugs, killing him almost instantly. By the same discharge the
+ stranger at McGee's side also received attentions which proved fatal in
+ the course of two or three days.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link351" id="link351"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="351.jpg (9K)" src="images/351.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch50" id="linkch50"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER L.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ These murder and jury statistics remind me of a certain very extraordinary
+ trial and execution of twenty years ago; it is a scrap of history familiar
+ to all old Californians, and worthy to be known by other peoples of the
+ earth that love simple, straightforward justice unencumbered with
+ nonsense. I would apologize for this digression but for the fact that the
+ information I am about to offer is apology enough in itself. And since I
+ digress constantly anyhow, perhaps it is as well to eschew apologies
+ altogether and thus prevent their growing irksome.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Capt. Ned Blakely&mdash;that name will answer as well as any other
+ fictitious one (for he was still with the living at last accounts, and may
+ not desire to be famous)&mdash;sailed ships out of the harbor of San
+ Francisco for many years. He was a stalwart, warm-hearted, eagle-eyed
+ veteran, who had been a sailor nearly fifty years&mdash;a sailor from
+ early boyhood. He was a rough, honest creature, full of pluck, and just as
+ full of hard-headed simplicity, too. He hated trifling conventionalities&mdash;"business"
+ was the word, with him. He had all a sailor's vindictiveness against the
+ quips and quirks of the law, and steadfastly believed that the first and
+ last aim and object of the law and lawyers was to defeat justice.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He sailed for the Chincha Islands in command of a guano ship. He had a
+ fine crew, but his negro mate was his pet&mdash;on him he had for years
+ lavished his admiration and esteem. It was Capt. Ned's first voyage to the
+ Chinchas, but his fame had gone before him&mdash;the fame of being a man
+ who would fight at the dropping of a handkerchief, when imposed upon, and
+ would stand no nonsense. It was a fame well earned. Arrived in the
+ islands, he found that the staple of conversation was the exploits of one
+ Bill Noakes, a bully, the mate of a trading ship. This man had created a
+ small reign of terror there. At nine o'clock at night, Capt. Ned, all
+ alone, was pacing his deck in the starlight. A form ascended the side, and
+ approached him. Capt. Ned said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Who goes there?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link353" id="link353"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="353.jpg (77K)" src="images/353.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I'm Bill Noakes, the best man in the islands."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "What do you want aboard this ship?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I've heard of Capt. Ned Blakely, and one of us is a better man than
+ 'tother&mdash;I'll know which, before I go ashore."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You've come to the right shop&mdash;I'm your man. I'll learn you to come
+ aboard this ship without an invite."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He seized Noakes, backed him against the mainmast, pounded his face to a
+ pulp, and then threw him overboard.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Noakes was not convinced. He returned the next night, got the pulp
+ renewed, and went overboard head first, as before.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He was satisfied.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A week after this, while Noakes was carousing with a sailor crowd on
+ shore, at noonday, Capt. Ned's colored mate came along, and Noakes tried
+ to pick a quarrel with him. The negro evaded the trap, and tried to get
+ away. Noakes followed him up; the negro began to run; Noakes fired on him
+ with a revolver and killed him. Half a dozen sea-captains witnessed the
+ whole affair. Noakes retreated to the small after-cabin of his ship, with
+ two other bullies, and gave out that death would be the portion of any man
+ that intruded there. There was no attempt made to follow the villains;
+ there was no disposition to do it, and indeed very little thought of such
+ an enterprise. There were no courts and no officers; there was no
+ government; the islands belonged to Peru, and Peru was far away; she had
+ no official representative on the ground; and neither had any other
+ nation.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ However, Capt. Ned was not perplexing his head about such things. They
+ concerned him not. He was boiling with rage and furious for justice. At
+ nine o'clock at night he loaded a double-barreled gun with slugs, fished
+ out a pair of handcuffs, got a ship's lantern, summoned his quartermaster,
+ and went ashore. He said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Do you see that ship there at the dock?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Ay-ay, sir."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "It's the Venus."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Ay-ay, sir."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You&mdash;you know me."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Ay-ay, sir."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Very well, then. Take the lantern. Carry it just under your chin. I'll
+ walk behind you and rest this gun-barrel on your shoulder, p'inting
+ forward&mdash;so. Keep your lantern well up so's I can see things ahead of
+ you good. I'm going to march in on Noakes&mdash;and take him&mdash;and jug
+ the other chaps. If you flinch&mdash;well, you know me."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Ay-ay, sir."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In this order they filed aboard softly, arrived at Noakes's den, the
+ quartermaster pushed the door open, and the lantern revealed the three
+ desperadoes sitting on the floor. Capt. Ned said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link355" id="link355"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="355.jpg (93K)" src="images/355.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I'm Ned Blakely. I've got you under fire. Don't you move without orders&mdash;any
+ of you. You two kneel down in the corner; faces to the wall&mdash;now.
+ Bill Noakes, put these handcuffs on; now come up close. Quartermaster,
+ fasten 'em. All right. Don't stir, sir. Quartermaster, put the key in the
+ outside of the door. Now, men, I'm going to lock you two in; and if you
+ try to burst through this door&mdash;well, you've heard of me. Bill
+ Noakes, fall in ahead, and march. All set. Quartermaster, lock the door."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Noakes spent the night on board Blakely's ship, a prisoner under strict
+ guard. Early in the morning Capt. Ned called in all the sea-captains in
+ the harbor and invited them, with nautical ceremony, to be present on
+ board his ship at nine o'clock to witness the hanging of Noakes at the
+ yard-arm!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "What! The man has not been tried."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Of course he hasn't. But didn't he kill the nigger?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Certainly he did; but you are not thinking of hanging him without a
+ trial?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Trial! What do I want to try him for, if he killed the nigger?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh, Capt. Ned, this will never do. Think how it will sound."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Sound be hanged! Didn't he kill the nigger?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Certainly, certainly, Capt. Ned,&mdash;nobody denies that,&mdash;but&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Then I'm going to hang him, that's all. Everybody I've talked to talks
+ just the same way you do. Everybody says he killed the nigger, everybody
+ knows he killed the nigger, and yet every lubber of you wants him tried
+ for it. I don't understand such bloody foolishness as that. Tried! Mind
+ you, I don't object to trying him, if it's got to be done to give
+ satisfaction; and I'll be there, and chip in and help, too; but put it off
+ till afternoon&mdash;put it off till afternoon, for I'll have my hands
+ middling full till after the burying&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why, what do you mean? Are you going to hang him any how&mdash;and try
+ him afterward?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Didn't I say I was going to hang him? I never saw such people as you.
+ What's the difference? You ask a favor, and then you ain't satisfied when
+ you get it. Before or after's all one&mdash;you know how the trial will
+ go. He killed the nigger. Say&mdash;I must be going. If your mate would
+ like to come to the hanging, fetch him along. I like him."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There was a stir in the camp. The captains came in a body and pleaded with
+ Capt. Ned not to do this rash thing. They promised that they would create
+ a court composed of captains of the best character; they would empanel a
+ jury; they would conduct everything in a way becoming the serious nature
+ of the business in hand, and give the case an impartial hearing and the
+ accused a fair trial. And they said it would be murder, and punishable by
+ the American courts if he persisted and hung the accused on his ship. They
+ pleaded hard. Capt. Ned said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gentlemen, I'm not stubborn and I'm not unreasonable. I'm always willing
+ to do just as near right as I can. How long will it take?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Probably only a little while."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "And can I take him up the shore and hang him as soon as you are done?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "If he is proven guilty he shall be hanged without unnecessary delay."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "If he's proven guilty. Great Neptune, ain't he guilty? This beats my
+ time. Why you all know he's guilty."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But at last they satisfied him that they were projecting nothing
+ underhanded. Then he said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, all right. You go on and try him and I'll go down and overhaul his
+ conscience and prepare him to go&mdash;like enough he needs it, and I
+ don't want to send him off without a show for hereafter."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This was another obstacle. They finally convinced him that it was
+ necessary to have the accused in court. Then they said they would send a
+ guard to bring him.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No, sir, I prefer to fetch him myself&mdash;he don't get out of my hands.
+ Besides, I've got to go to the ship to get a rope, anyway."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The court assembled with due ceremony, empaneled a jury, and presently
+ Capt. Ned entered, leading the prisoner with one hand and carrying a Bible
+ and a rope in the other. He seated himself by the side of his captive and
+ told the court to "up anchor and make sail." Then he turned a searching
+ eye on the jury, and detected Noakes's friends, the two bullies.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He strode over and said to them confidentially:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You're here to interfere, you see. Now you vote right, do you hear?&mdash;or
+ else there'll be a double-barreled inquest here when this trial's off, and
+ your remainders will go home in a couple of baskets."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The caution was not without fruit. The jury was a unit&mdash;the verdict.
+ "Guilty."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Capt. Ned sprung to his feet and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Come along&mdash;you're my meat now, my lad, anyway. Gentlemen you've
+ done yourselves proud. I invite you all to come and see that I do it all
+ straight. Follow me to the canyon, a mile above here."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The court informed him that a sheriff had been appointed to do the
+ hanging, and&mdash;
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Capt. Ned's patience was at an end. His wrath was boundless. The subject
+ of a sheriff was judiciously dropped.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When the crowd arrived at the canyon, Capt. Ned climbed a tree and
+ arranged the halter, then came down and noosed his man. He opened his
+ Bible, and laid aside his hat. Selecting a chapter at random, he read it
+ through, in a deep bass voice and with sincere solemnity. Then he said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Lad, you are about to go aloft and give an account of yourself; and the
+ lighter a man's manifest is, as far as sin's concerned, the better for
+ him. Make a clean breast, man, and carry a log with you that'll bear
+ inspection. You killed the nigger?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link358" id="link358"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="358.jpg (61K)" src="images/358.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ No reply. A long pause.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The captain read another chapter, pausing, from time to time, to impress
+ the effect. Then he talked an earnest, persuasive sermon to him, and ended
+ by repeating the question:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Did you kill the nigger?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ No reply&mdash;other than a malignant scowl. The captain now read the
+ first and second chapters of Genesis, with deep feeling&mdash;paused a
+ moment, closed the book reverently, and said with a perceptible savor of
+ satisfaction:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "There. Four chapters. There's few that would have took the pains with you
+ that I have."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then he swung up the condemned, and made the rope fast; stood by and timed
+ him half an hour with his watch, and then delivered the body to the court.
+ A little after, as he stood contemplating the motionless figure, a doubt
+ came into his face; evidently he felt a twinge of conscience&mdash;a
+ misgiving&mdash;and he said with a sigh:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, p'raps I ought to burnt him, maybe. But I was trying to do for the
+ best."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When the history of this affair reached California (it was in the "early
+ days") it made a deal of talk, but did not diminish the captain's
+ popularity in any degree. It increased it, indeed. California had a
+ population then that "inflicted" justice after a fashion that was
+ simplicity and primitiveness itself, and could therefore admire
+ appreciatively when the same fashion was followed elsewhere.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link359" id="link359"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="359.jpg (38K)" src="images/359.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch51" id="linkch51"></a>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Vice flourished luxuriantly during the hey-day of our "flush times." The
+ saloons were overburdened with custom; so were the police courts, the
+ gambling dens, the brothels and the jails&mdash;unfailing signs of high
+ prosperity in a mining region&mdash;in any region for that matter. Is it
+ not so? A crowded police court docket is the surest of all signs that
+ trade is brisk and money plenty. Still, there is one other sign; it comes
+ last, but when it does come it establishes beyond cavil that the "flush
+ times" are at the flood. This is the birth of the "literary" paper. The
+ Weekly Occidental, "devoted to literature," made its appearance in
+ Virginia. All the literary people were engaged to write for it. Mr. F. was
+ to edit it. He was a felicitous skirmisher with a pen, and a man who could
+ say happy things in a crisp, neat way. Once, while editor of the Union, he
+ had disposed of a labored, incoherent, two-column attack made upon him by
+ a contemporary, with a single line, which, at first glance, seemed to
+ contain a solemn and tremendous compliment&mdash;viz.: "THE LOGIC OF OUR
+ ADVERSARY RESEMBLES THE PEACE OF GOD,"&mdash;and left it to the reader's
+ memory and after-thought to invest the remark with another and "more
+ different" meaning by supplying for himself and at his own leisure the
+ rest of the Scripture&mdash;"in that it passeth understanding." He once
+ said of a little, half-starved, wayside community that had no subsistence
+ except what they could get by preying upon chance passengers who stopped
+ over with them a day when traveling by the overland stage, that in their
+ Church service they had altered the Lord's Prayer to read: "Give us this
+ day our daily stranger!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We expected great things of the Occidental. Of course it could not get
+ along without an original novel, and so we made arrangements to hurl into
+ the work the full strength of the company. Mrs. F. was an able romancist
+ of the ineffable school&mdash;I know no other name to apply to a school
+ whose heroes are all dainty and all perfect. She wrote the opening
+ chapter, and introduced a lovely blonde simpleton who talked nothing but
+ pearls and poetry and who was virtuous to the verge of eccentricity. She
+ also introduced a young French Duke of aggravated refinement, in love with
+ the blonde. Mr. F. followed next week, with a brilliant lawyer who set
+ about getting the Duke's estates into trouble, and a sparkling young lady
+ of high society who fell to fascinating the Duke and impairing the
+ appetite of the blonde. Mr. D., a dark and bloody editor of one of the
+ dailies, followed Mr. F., the third week, introducing a mysterious
+ Roscicrucian who transmuted metals, held consultations with the devil in a
+ cave at dead of night, and cast the horoscope of the several heroes and
+ heroines in such a way as to provide plenty of trouble for their future
+ careers and breed a solemn and awful public interest in the novel. He also
+ introduced a cloaked and masked melodramatic miscreant, put him on a
+ salary and set him on the midnight track of the Duke with a poisoned
+ dagger. He also created an Irish coachman with a rich brogue and placed
+ him in the service of the society-young-lady with an ulterior mission to
+ carry billet-doux to the Duke.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link361" id="link361"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="361.jpg (79K)" src="images/361.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ About this time there arrived in Virginia a dissolute stranger with a
+ literary turn of mind&mdash;rather seedy he was, but very quiet and
+ unassuming; almost diffident, indeed. He was so gentle, and his manners
+ were so pleasing and kindly, whether he was sober or intoxicated, that he
+ made friends of all who came in contact with him. He applied for literary
+ work, offered conclusive evidence that he wielded an easy and practiced
+ pen, and so Mr. F. engaged him at once to help write the novel. His
+ chapter was to follow Mr. D.'s, and mine was to come next. Now what does
+ this fellow do but go off and get drunk and then proceed to his quarters
+ and set to work with his imagination in a state of chaos, and that chaos
+ in a condition of extravagant activity. The result may be guessed. He
+ scanned the chapters of his predecessors, found plenty of heroes and
+ heroines already created, and was satisfied with them; he decided to
+ introduce no more; with all the confidence that whisky inspires and all
+ the easy complacency it gives to its servant, he then launched himself
+ lovingly into his work: he married the coachman to the society-young-lady
+ for the sake of the scandal; married the Duke to the blonde's stepmother,
+ for the sake of the sensation; stopped the desperado's salary; created a
+ misunderstanding between the devil and the Roscicrucian; threw the Duke's
+ property into the wicked lawyer's hands; made the lawyer's upbraiding
+ conscience drive him to drink, thence to delirium tremens, thence to
+ suicide; broke the coachman's neck; let his widow succumb to contumely,
+ neglect, poverty and consumption; caused the blonde to drown herself,
+ leaving her clothes on the bank with the customary note pinned to them
+ forgiving the Duke and hoping he would be happy; revealed to the Duke, by
+ means of the usual strawberry mark on left arm, that he had married his
+ own long-lost mother and destroyed his long-lost sister; instituted the
+ proper and necessary suicide of the Duke and the Duchess in order to
+ compass poetical justice; opened the earth and let the Roscicrucian
+ through, accompanied with the accustomed smoke and thunder and smell of
+ brimstone, and finished with the promise that in the next chapter, after
+ holding a general inquest, he would take up the surviving character of the
+ novel and tell what became of the devil!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link362" id="link362"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="362.jpg (39K)" src="images/362.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It read with singular smoothness, and with a "dead" earnestness that was
+ funny enough to suffocate a body. But there was war when it came in. The
+ other novelists were furious. The mild stranger, not yet more than half
+ sober, stood there, under a scathing fire of vituperation, meek and
+ bewildered, looking from one to another of his assailants, and wondering
+ what he could have done to invoke such a storm. When a lull came at last,
+ he said his say gently and appealingly&mdash;said he did not rightly
+ remember what he had written, but was sure he had tried to do the best he
+ could, and knew his object had been to make the novel not only pleasant
+ and plausible but instructive and&mdash;&mdash;
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The bombardment began again. The novelists assailed his ill-chosen
+ adjectives and demolished them with a storm of denunciation and ridicule.
+ And so the siege went on. Every time the stranger tried to appease the
+ enemy he only made matters worse. Finally he offered to rewrite the
+ chapter. This arrested hostilities. The indignation gradually quieted
+ down, peace reigned again and the sufferer retired in safety and got him
+ to his own citadel.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But on the way thither the evil angel tempted him and he got drunk again.
+ And again his imagination went mad. He led the heroes and heroines a
+ wilder dance than ever; and yet all through it ran that same convincing
+ air of honesty and earnestness that had marked his first work. He got the
+ characters into the most extraordinary situations, put them through the
+ most surprising performances, and made them talk the strangest talk! But
+ the chapter cannot be described. It was symmetrically crazy; it was
+ artistically absurd; and it had explanatory footnotes that were fully as
+ curious as the text. I remember one of the "situations," and will offer it
+ as an example of the whole. He altered the character of the brilliant
+ lawyer, and made him a great-hearted, splendid fellow; gave him fame and
+ riches, and set his age at thirty-three years. Then he made the blonde
+ discover, through the help of the Roscicrucian and the melodramatic
+ miscreant, that while the Duke loved her money ardently and wanted it, he
+ secretly felt a sort of leaning toward the society-young-lady. Stung to
+ the quick, she tore her affections from him and bestowed them with tenfold
+ power upon the lawyer, who responded with consuming zeal. But the parents
+ would none of it. What they wanted in the family was a Duke; and a Duke
+ they were determined to have; though they confessed that next to the Duke
+ the lawyer had their preference. Necessarily the blonde now went into a
+ decline. The parents were alarmed. They pleaded with her to marry the
+ Duke, but she steadfastly refused, and pined on. Then they laid a plan.
+ They told her to wait a year and a day, and if at the end of that time she
+ still felt that she could not marry the Duke, she might marry the lawyer
+ with their full consent. The result was as they had foreseen: gladness
+ came again, and the flush of returning health. Then the parents took the
+ next step in their scheme. They had the family physician recommend a long
+ sea voyage and much land travel for the thorough restoration of the
+ blonde's strength; and they invited the Duke to be of the party. They
+ judged that the Duke's constant presence and the lawyer's protracted
+ absence would do the rest&mdash;for they did not invite the lawyer.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So they set sail in a steamer for America&mdash;and the third day out,
+ when their sea-sickness called truce and permitted them to take their
+ first meal at the public table, behold there sat the lawyer! The Duke and
+ party made the best of an awkward situation; the voyage progressed, and
+ the vessel neared America.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link365" id="link365"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="365.jpg (74K)" src="images/365.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But, by and by, two hundred miles off New Bedford, the ship took fire; she
+ burned to the water's edge; of all her crew and passengers, only thirty
+ were saved. They floated about the sea half an afternoon and all night
+ long. Among them were our friends. The lawyer, by superhuman exertions,
+ had saved the blonde and her parents, swimming back and forth two hundred
+ yards and bringing one each time&mdash;(the girl first). The Duke had
+ saved himself. In the morning two whale ships arrived on the scene and
+ sent their boats. The weather was stormy and the embarkation was attended
+ with much confusion and excitement. The lawyer did his duty like a man;
+ helped his exhausted and insensible blonde, her parents and some others
+ into a boat (the Duke helped himself in); then a child fell overboard at
+ the other end of the raft and the lawyer rushed thither and helped half a
+ dozen people fish it out, under the stimulus of its mother's screams. Then
+ he ran back&mdash;a few seconds too late&mdash;the blonde's boat was under
+ way. So he had to take the other boat, and go to the other ship. The storm
+ increased and drove the vessels out of sight of each other&mdash;drove
+ them whither it would.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link366" id="link366"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="366.jpg (83K)" src="images/366.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When it calmed, at the end of three days, the blonde's ship was seven
+ hundred miles north of Boston and the other about seven hundred south of
+ that port. The blonde's captain was bound on a whaling cruise in the North
+ Atlantic and could not go back such a distance or make a port without
+ orders; such being nautical law. The lawyer's captain was to cruise in the
+ North Pacific, and he could not go back or make a port without orders. All
+ the lawyer's money and baggage were in the blonde's boat and went to the
+ blonde's ship&mdash;so his captain made him work his passage as a common
+ sailor. When both ships had been cruising nearly a year, the one was off
+ the coast of Greenland and the other in Behring's Strait. The blonde had
+ long ago been well-nigh persuaded that her lawyer had been washed
+ overboard and lost just before the whale ships reached the raft, and now,
+ under the pleadings of her parents and the Duke she was at last beginning
+ to nerve herself for the doom of the covenant, and prepare for the hated
+ marriage.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But she would not yield a day before the date set. The weeks dragged on,
+ the time narrowed, orders were given to deck the ship for the wedding&mdash;a
+ wedding at sea among icebergs and walruses. Five days more and all would
+ be over. So the blonde reflected, with a sigh and a tear. Oh where was her
+ true love&mdash;and why, why did he not come and save her? At that moment
+ he was lifting his harpoon to strike a whale in Behring's Strait, five
+ thousand miles away, by the way of the Arctic Ocean, or twenty thousand by
+ the way of the Horn&mdash;that was the reason. He struck, but not with
+ perfect aim&mdash;his foot slipped and he fell in the whale's mouth and
+ went down his throat. He was insensible five days. Then he came to himself
+ and heard voices; daylight was streaming through a hole cut in the whale's
+ roof. He climbed out and astonished the sailors who were hoisting blubber
+ up a ship's side. He recognized the vessel, flew aboard, surprised the
+ wedding party at the altar and exclaimed:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Stop the proceedings&mdash;I'm here! Come to my arms, my own!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link367" id="link367"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="367.jpg (88K)" src="images/367.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There were foot-notes to this extravagant piece of literature wherein the
+ author endeavored to show that the whole thing was within the
+ possibilities; he said he got the incident of the whale traveling from
+ Behring's Strait to the coast of Greenland, five thousand miles in five
+ days, through the Arctic Ocean, from Charles Reade's "Love Me Little Love
+ Me Long," and considered that that established the fact that the thing
+ could be done; and he instanced Jonah's adventure as proof that a man
+ could live in a whale's belly, and added that if a preacher could stand it
+ three days a lawyer could surely stand it five!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There was a fiercer storm than ever in the editorial sanctum now, and the
+ stranger was peremptorily discharged, and his manuscript flung at his
+ head. But he had already delayed things so much that there was not time
+ for some one else to rewrite the chapter, and so the paper came out
+ without any novel in it. It was but a feeble, struggling, stupid journal,
+ and the absence of the novel probably shook public confidence; at any
+ rate, before the first side of the next issue went to press, the Weekly
+ Occidental died as peacefully as an infant.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ An effort was made to resurrect it, with the proposed advantage of a
+ telling new title, and Mr. F. said that The Phenix would be just the name
+ for it, because it would give the idea of a resurrection from its dead
+ ashes in a new and undreamed of condition of splendor; but some low-
+ priced smarty on one of the dailies suggested that we call it the Lazarus;
+ and inasmuch as the people were not profound in Scriptural matters but
+ thought the resurrected Lazarus and the dilapidated mendicant that begged
+ in the rich man's gateway were one and the same person, the name became
+ the laughing stock of the town, and killed the paper for good and all.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I was sorry enough, for I was very proud of being connected with a
+ literary paper&mdash;prouder than I have ever been of anything since,
+ perhaps. I had written some rhymes for it&mdash;poetry I considered it&mdash;and
+ it was a great grief to me that the production was on the "first side" of
+ the issue that was not completed, and hence did not see the light. But
+ time brings its revenges&mdash;I can put it in here; it will answer in
+ place of a tear dropped to the memory of the lost Occidental. The idea
+ (not the chief idea, but the vehicle that bears it) was probably suggested
+ by the old song called "The Raging Canal," but I cannot remember now. I do
+ remember, though, that at that time I thought my doggerel was one of the
+ ablest poems of the age:
+ </p>
+ <h3>
+ THE AGED PILOT MAN.
+ </h3>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ On the Erie Canal, it was,<br /> All on a summer's day,<br /> I sailed
+ forth with my parents<br /> Far away to Albany.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ From out the clouds at noon that day<br /> There came a dreadful storm,<br />
+ That piled the billows high about,<br /> And filled us with alarm.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A man came rushing from a house,<br /> Saying, "Snub up your boat I pray,<br />
+ [The customary canal technicality for 'tie up.']<br /> Snub up your boat,
+ snub up, alas,<br /> Snub up while yet you may."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Our captain cast one glance astern,<br /> Then forward glanced he,<br />
+ And said, "My wife and little ones<br /> I never more shall see."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Said Dollinger the pilot man,<br /> In noble words, but few,--<br /> "Fear
+ not, but lean on Dollinger,<br /> And he will fetch you through."
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link370" id="link370"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="370.jpg (53K)" src="images/370.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ The boat drove on, the frightened mules<br /> Tore through the rain and
+ wind,<br /> And bravely still, in danger's post,<br /> The whip-boy strode
+ behind.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Come 'board, come 'board," the captain cried,<br /> "Nor tempt so wild a
+ storm;"<br /> But still the raging mules advanced,<br /> And still the boy
+ strode on.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then said the captain to us all,<br /> "Alas, 'tis plain to me,<br /> The
+ greater danger is not there,<br /> But here upon the sea.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "So let us strive, while life remains,<br /> To save all souls on board,<br />
+ And then if die at last we must,<br /> Let . &nbsp;. &nbsp;. &nbsp;.
+ &nbsp;I cannot speak the word!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Said Dollinger the pilot man,<br /> Tow'ring above the crew,<br /> "Fear
+ not, but trust in Dollinger,<br /> And he will fetch you through."
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link371" id="link371"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="371.jpg (102K)" src="images/371.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "Low bridge! &nbsp;low bridge!" all heads went down,<br /> The laboring
+ bark sped on;<br /> A mill we passed, we passed church,<br /> Hamlets, and
+ fields of corn;<br /> And all the world came out to see,<br /> And chased
+ along the shore<br /> Crying, "Alas, alas, the sheeted rain,<br /> The
+ wind, the tempest's roar!<br /> Alas, the gallant ship and crew,<br /> Can
+ nothing help them more?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And from our deck sad eyes looked out<br /> Across the stormy scene:<br />
+ The tossing wake of billows aft,<br /> The bending forests green,<br />
+ The chickens sheltered under carts<br /> In lee of barn the cows,<br />
+ The skurrying swine with straw in mouth,<br /> The wild spray from our
+ bows!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "She balances!<br /> She wavers!<br /> Now let her go about!<br /> If she
+ misses stays and broaches to,<br /> We're all"--then with a shout,<br />
+ "Huray! &nbsp;huray!<br /> Avast! &nbsp;belay!<br /> Take in more sail!<br />
+ Lord, what a gale!<br /> Ho, boy, haul taut on the hind mule's tail!"<br />
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link372" id="link372"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="372.jpg (105K)" src="images/372.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "Ho! &nbsp;lighten ship! &nbsp;ho! &nbsp;man the pump!<br /> Ho, hostler,
+ heave the lead!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "A quarter-three!--'tis shoaling fast!<br /> Three feet large!--t-h-r-e-e
+ feet!--<br /> Three feet scant!" I cried in fright<br /> "Oh, is there no
+ retreat?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Said Dollinger, the pilot man,<br /> As on the vessel flew,<br /> "Fear
+ not, but trust in Dollinger,<br /> And he will fetch you through."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A panic struck the bravest hearts,<br /> The boldest cheek turned pale;<br />
+ For plain to all, this shoaling said<br /> A leak had burst the ditch's
+ bed!<br /> And, straight as bolt from crossbow sped,<br /> Our ship swept
+ on, with shoaling lead,<br /> Before the fearful gale!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Sever the tow-line! &nbsp;Cripple the mules!"<br /> Too late! &nbsp;There
+ comes a shock!<br /> Another length, and the fated craft<br /> Would have
+ swum in the saving lock!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then gathered together the shipwrecked crew<br /> And took one last
+ embrace,<br /> While sorrowful tears from despairing eyes<br /> Ran down
+ each hopeless face;<br /> And some did think of their little ones<br />
+ Whom they never more might see,<br /> And others of waiting wives at
+ home,<br /> And mothers that grieved would be.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But of all the children of misery there<br /> On that poor sinking frame,<br />
+ But one spake words of hope and faith,<br /> And I worshipped as they
+ came:<br /> Said Dollinger the pilot man,--<br /> (O brave heart, strong
+ and true!)--<br /> "Fear not, but trust in Dollinger,<br /> For he will
+ fetch you through."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Lo! &nbsp;scarce the words have passed his lips<br /> The dauntless
+ prophet say'th,<br /> When every soul about him seeth<br /> A wonder crown
+ his faith!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "And count ye all, both great and small,<br /> As numbered with the dead:<br />
+ For mariner for forty year,<br /> On Erie, boy and man,<br /> I never yet
+ saw such a storm,<br /> Or one't with it began!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So overboard a keg of nails<br /> And anvils three we threw,<br />
+ Likewise four bales of gunny-sacks,<br /> Two hundred pounds of glue,<br />
+ Two sacks of corn, four ditto wheat,<br /> A box of books, a cow,<br /> A
+ violin, Lord Byron's works,<br /> A rip-saw and a sow.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link374" id="link374"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="374.jpg (67K)" src="images/374.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ A curve! &nbsp;a curve! &nbsp;the dangers grow!<br />
+ "Labbord!--stabbord!--s-t-e-a-d-y!--so!--<br /> Hard-a-port,
+ Dol!--hellum-a-lee!<br /> Haw the head mule!--the aft one gee!<br />
+ Luff!--bring her to the wind!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ For straight a farmer brought a plank,--<br /> (Mysteriously inspired)--<br />
+ And laying it unto the ship,<br /> In silent awe retired.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then every sufferer stood amazed<br /> That pilot man before;<br /> A
+ moment stood. &nbsp;Then wondering turned,<br /> And speechless walked
+ ashore.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link375" id="link375"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="375.jpg (82K)" src="images/375.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch52" id="linkch52"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Since I desire, in this chapter, to say an instructive word or two about
+ the silver mines, the reader may take this fair warning and skip, if he
+ chooses. The year 1863 was perhaps the very top blossom and culmination of
+ the "flush times." Virginia swarmed with men and vehicles to that degree
+ that the place looked like a very hive&mdash;that is when one's vision
+ could pierce through the thick fog of alkali dust that was generally
+ blowing in summer. I will say, concerning this dust, that if you drove ten
+ miles through it, you and your horses would be coated with it a sixteenth
+ of an inch thick and present an outside appearance that was a uniform pale
+ yellow color, and your buggy would have three inches of dust in it, thrown
+ there by the wheels. The delicate scales used by the assayers were
+ inclosed in glass cases intended to be air-tight, and yet some of this
+ dust was so impalpable and so invisibly fine that it would get in,
+ somehow, and impair the accuracy of those scales.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Speculation ran riot, and yet there was a world of substantial business
+ going on, too. All freights were brought over the mountains from
+ California (150 miles) by pack-train partly, and partly in huge wagons
+ drawn by such long mule teams that each team amounted to a procession, and
+ it did seem, sometimes, that the grand combined procession of animals
+ stretched unbroken from Virginia to California. Its long route was
+ traceable clear across the deserts of the Territory by the writhing
+ serpent of dust it lifted up. By these wagons, freights over that hundred
+ and fifty miles were $200 a ton for small lots (same price for all express
+ matter brought by stage), and $100 a ton for full loads. One Virginia firm
+ received one hundred tons of freight a month, and paid $10,000 a month
+ freightage. In the winter the freights were much higher. All the bullion
+ was shipped in bars by stage to San Francisco (a bar was usually about
+ twice the size of a pig of lead and contained from $1,500 to $3,000
+ according to the amount of gold mixed with the silver), and the freight on
+ it (when the shipment was large) was one and a quarter per cent. of its
+ intrinsic value.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link377" id="link377"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="377.jpg (16K)" src="images/377.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So, the freight on these bars probably averaged something more than $25
+ each. Small shippers paid two per cent. There were three stages a day,
+ each way, and I have seen the out-going stages carry away a third of a ton
+ of bullion each, and more than once I saw them divide a two-ton lot and
+ take it off. However, these were extraordinary events. [Mr. Valentine,
+ Wells Fargo's agent, has handled all the bullion shipped through the
+ Virginia office for many a month. To his memory&mdash;which is excellent&mdash;we
+ are indebted for the following exhibit of the company's business in the
+ Virginia office since the first of January, 1862: From January 1st to
+ April 1st, about $270,000 worth of bullion passed through that office,
+ during the next quarter, $570,000; next quarter, $800,000; next quarter,
+ $956,000; next quarter, $1,275,000; and for the quarter ending on the 30th
+ of last June, about $1,600,000. Thus in a year and a half, the Virginia
+ office only shipped $5,330,000 in bullion. During the year 1862 they
+ shipped $2,615,000, so we perceive the average shipments have more than
+ doubled in the last six months. This gives us room to promise for the
+ Virginia office $500,000 a month for the year 1863 (though perhaps,
+ judging by the steady increase in the business, we are under estimating,
+ somewhat). This gives us $6,000,000 for the year. Gold Hill and Silver
+ City together can beat us&mdash;we will give them $10,000,000. To Dayton,
+ Empire City, Ophir and Carson City, we will allow an aggregate of
+ $8,000,000, which is not over the mark, perhaps, and may possibly be a
+ little under it. To Esmeralda we give $4,000,000. To Reese River and
+ Humboldt $2,000,000, which is liberal now, but may not be before the year
+ is out. So we prognosticate that the yield of bullion this year will be
+ about $30,000,000. Placing the number of mills in the Territory at one
+ hundred, this gives to each the labor of producing $300,000 in bullion
+ during the twelve months. Allowing them to run three hundred days in the
+ year (which none of them more than do), this makes their work average
+ $1,000 a day. Say the mills average twenty tons of rock a day and this
+ rock worth $50 as a general thing, and you have the actual work of our one
+ hundred mills figured down "to a spot"&mdash;$1,000 a day each, and
+ $30,000,000 a year in the aggregate.&mdash;Enterprise. [A considerable
+ over estimate&mdash;M. T.]]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Two tons of silver bullion would be in the neighborhood of forty bars, and
+ the freight on it over $1,000. Each coach always carried a deal of
+ ordinary express matter beside, and also from fifteen to twenty passengers
+ at from $25 to $30 a head. With six stages going all the time, Wells,
+ Fargo and Co.'s Virginia City business was important and lucrative.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ All along under the centre of Virginia and Gold Hill, for a couple of
+ miles, ran the great Comstock silver lode&mdash;a vein of ore from fifty
+ to eighty feet thick between its solid walls of rock&mdash;a vein as wide
+ as some of New York's streets. I will remind the reader that in
+ Pennsylvania a coal vein only eight feet wide is considered ample.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Virginia was a busy city of streets and houses above ground. Under it was
+ another busy city, down in the bowels of the earth, where a great
+ population of men thronged in and out among an intricate maze of tunnels
+ and drifts, flitting hither and thither under a winking sparkle of lights,
+ and over their heads towered a vast web of interlocking timbers that held
+ the walls of the gutted Comstock apart. These timbers were as large as a
+ man's body, and the framework stretched upward so far that no eye could
+ pierce to its top through the closing gloom. It was like peering up
+ through the clean-picked ribs and bones of some colossal skeleton. Imagine
+ such a framework two miles long, sixty feet wide, and higher than any
+ church spire in America. Imagine this stately lattice- work stretching
+ down Broadway, from the St. Nicholas to Wall street, and a Fourth of July
+ procession, reduced to pigmies, parading on top of it and flaunting their
+ flags, high above the pinnacle of Trinity steeple. One can imagine that,
+ but he cannot well imagine what that forest of timbers cost, from the time
+ they were felled in the pineries beyond Washoe Lake, hauled up and around
+ Mount Davidson at atrocious rates of freightage, then squared, let down
+ into the deep maw of the mine and built up there. Twenty ample fortunes
+ would not timber one of the greatest of those silver mines. The Spanish
+ proverb says it requires a gold mine to "run" a silver one, and it is
+ true. A beggar with a silver mine is a pitiable pauper indeed if he cannot
+ sell.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link379" id="link379"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="379.jpg (47K)" src="images/379.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I spoke of the underground Virginia as a city. The Gould and Curry is only
+ one single mine under there, among a great many others; yet the Gould and
+ Curry's streets of dismal drifts and tunnels were five miles in extent,
+ altogether, and its population five hundred miners. Taken as a whole, the
+ underground city had some thirty miles of streets and a population of five
+ or six thousand. In this present day some of those populations are at work
+ from twelve to sixteen hundred feet under Virginia and Gold Hill, and the
+ signal-bells that tell them what the superintendent above ground desires
+ them to do are struck by telegraph as we strike a fire alarm. Sometimes
+ men fall down a shaft, there, a thousand feet deep. In such cases, the
+ usual plan is to hold an inquest.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link380" id="link380"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="380.jpg (161K)" src="images/380.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ If you wish to visit one of those mines, you may walk through a tunnel
+ about half a mile long if you prefer it, or you may take the quicker plan
+ of shooting like a dart down a shaft, on a small platform. It is like
+ tumbling down through an empty steeple, feet first. When you reach the
+ bottom, you take a candle and tramp through drifts and tunnels where
+ throngs of men are digging and blasting; you watch them send up tubs full
+ of great lumps of stone&mdash;silver ore; you select choice specimens from
+ the mass, as souvenirs; you admire the world of skeleton timbering; you
+ reflect frequently that you are buried under a mountain, a thousand feet
+ below daylight; being in the bottom of the mine you climb from "gallery"
+ to "gallery," up endless ladders that stand straight up and down; when
+ your legs fail you at last, you lie down in a small box-car in a cramped
+ "incline" like a half-up-ended sewer and are dragged up to daylight
+ feeling as if you are crawling through a coffin that has no end to it.
+ Arrived at the top, you find a busy crowd of men receiving the ascending
+ cars and tubs and dumping the ore from an elevation into long rows of bins
+ capable of holding half a dozen tons each; under the bins are rows of
+ wagons loading from chutes and trap-doors in the bins, and down the long
+ street is a procession of these wagons wending toward the silver mills
+ with their rich freight. It is all "done," now, and there you are. You
+ need never go down again, for you have seen it all. If you have forgotten
+ the process of reducing the ore in the mill and making the silver bars,
+ you can go back and find it again in my Esmeralda chapters if so disposed.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Of course these mines cave in, in places, occasionally, and then it is
+ worth one's while to take the risk of descending into them and observing
+ the crushing power exerted by the pressing weight of a settling mountain.
+ I published such an experience in the Enterprise, once, and from it I will
+ take an extract:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ AN HOUR IN THE CAVED MINES.&mdash;We journeyed down into the Ophir mine,
+ yesterday, to see the earthquake. We could not go down the deep incline,
+ because it still has a propensity to cave in places. Therefore we
+ traveled through the long tunnel which enters the hill above the Ophir
+ office, and then by means of a series of long ladders, climbed away down
+ from the first to the fourth gallery. Traversing a drift, we came to the
+ Spanish line, passed five sets of timbers still uninjured, and found the
+ earthquake. Here was as complete a chaos as ever was seen&mdash;vast
+ masses of earth and splintered and broken timbers piled confusedly
+ together, with scarcely an aperture left large enough for a cat to creep
+ through. Rubbish was still falling at intervals from above, and one
+ timber which had braced others earlier in the day, was now crushed down
+ out of its former position, showing that the caving and settling of the
+ tremendous mass was still going on. We were in that portion of the Ophir
+ known as the "north mines." Returning to the surface, we entered a
+ tunnel leading into the Central, for the purpose of getting into the
+ main Ophir. Descending a long incline in this tunnel, we traversed a
+ drift or so, and then went down a deep shaft from whence we proceeded
+ into the fifth gallery of the Ophir. From a side-drift we crawled
+ through a small hole and got into the midst of the earthquake again&mdash;earth
+ and broken timbers mingled together without regard to grace or symmetry.
+ A large portion of the second, third and fourth galleries had caved in
+ and gone to destruction&mdash;the two latter at seven o'clock on the
+ previous evening.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At the turn-table, near the northern extremity of the fifth gallery, two
+ big piles of rubbish had forced their way through from the fifth
+ gallery, and from the looks of the timbers, more was about to come.
+ These beams are solid&mdash;eighteen inches square; first, a great beam
+ is laid on the floor, then upright ones, five feet high, stand on it,
+ supporting another horizontal beam, and so on, square above square, like
+ the framework of a window. The superincumbent weight was sufficient to
+ mash the ends of those great upright beams fairly into the solid wood of
+ the horizontal ones three inches, compressing and bending the upright
+ beam till it curved like a bow. Before the Spanish caved in, some of
+ their twelve-inch horizontal timbers were compressed in this way until
+ they were only five inches thick! Imagine the power it must take to
+ squeeze a solid log together in that way. Here, also, was a range of
+ timbers, for a distance of twenty feet, tilted six inches out of the
+ perpendicular by the weight resting upon them from the caved galleries
+ above. You could hear things cracking and giving way, and it was not
+ pleasant to know that the world overhead was slowly and silently sinking
+ down upon you. The men down in the mine do not mind it, however.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Returning along the fifth gallery, we struck the safe part of the Ophir
+ incline, and went down it to the sixth; but we found ten inches of water
+ there, and had to come back. In repairing the damage done to the
+ incline, the pump had to be stopped for two hours, and in the meantime
+ the water gained about a foot. However, the pump was at work again, and
+ the flood-water was decreasing. We climbed up to the fifth gallery again
+ and sought a deep shaft, whereby we might descend to another part of the
+ sixth, out of reach of the water, but suffered disappointment, as the
+ men had gone to dinner, and there was no one to man the windlass. So,
+ having seen the earthquake, we climbed out at the Union incline and
+ tunnel, and adjourned, all dripping with candle grease and perspiration,
+ to lunch at the Ophir office.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ During the great flush year of 1863, Nevada [claims to have] produced
+ $25,000,000 in bullion&mdash;almost, if not quite, a round million to each
+ thousand inhabitants, which is very well, considering that she was without
+ agriculture and manufactures. Silver mining was her sole productive
+ industry.
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ [Since the above was in type, I learn from an official source that the
+ above figure is too high, and that the yield for 1863 did not exceed
+ $20,000,000.] However, the day for large figures is approaching; the
+ Sutro Tunnel is to plow through the Comstock lode from end to end, at a
+ depth of two thousand feet, and then mining will be easy and
+ comparatively inexpensive; and the momentous matters of drainage, and
+ hoisting and hauling of ore will cease to be burdensome. This vast work
+ will absorb many years, and millions of dollars, in its completion; but
+ it will early yield money, for that desirable epoch will begin as soon
+ as it strikes the first end of the vein. The tunnel will be some eight
+ miles long, and will develop astonishing riches. Cars will carry the ore
+ through the tunnel and dump it in the mills and thus do away with the
+ present costly system of double handling and transportation by mule
+ teams. The water from the tunnel will furnish the motive power for the
+ mills. Mr. Sutro, the originator of this prodigious enterprise, is one
+ of the few men in the world who is gifted with the pluck and
+ perseverance necessary to follow up and hound such an undertaking to its
+ completion. He has converted several obstinate Congresses to a deserved
+ friendliness toward his important work, and has gone up and down and to
+ and fro in Europe until he has enlisted a great moneyed interest in it
+ there.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch53" id="linkch53"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Every now and then, in these days, the boys used to tell me I ought to get
+ one Jim Blaine to tell me the stirring story of his grandfather's old ram&mdash;but
+ they always added that I must not mention the matter unless Jim was drunk
+ at the time&mdash;just comfortably and sociably drunk. They kept this up
+ until my curiosity was on the rack to hear the story. I got to haunting
+ Blaine; but it was of no use, the boys always found fault with his
+ condition; he was often moderately but never satisfactorily drunk. I never
+ watched a man's condition with such absorbing interest, such anxious
+ solicitude; I never so pined to see a man uncompromisingly drunk before.
+ At last, one evening I hurried to his cabin, for I learned that this time
+ his situation was such that even the most fastidious could find no fault
+ with it&mdash;he was tranquilly, serenely, symmetrically drunk&mdash;not a
+ hiccup to mar his voice, not a cloud upon his brain thick enough to
+ obscure his memory. As I entered, he was sitting upon an empty powder-
+ keg, with a clay pipe in one hand and the other raised to command silence.
+ His face was round, red, and very serious; his throat was bare and his
+ hair tumbled; in general appearance and costume he was a stalwart miner of
+ the period. On the pine table stood a candle, and its dim light revealed
+ "the boys" sitting here and there on bunks, candle-boxes, powder-kegs,
+ etc. They said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Sh&mdash;! Don't speak&mdash;he's going to commence."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link384" id="link384"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="384.jpg (53K)" src="images/384.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h3>
+ THE STORY OF THE OLD RAM.
+ </h3>
+ <p>
+ I found a seat at once, and Blaine said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ 'I don't reckon them times will ever come again. There never was a more
+ bullier old ram than what he was. Grandfather fetched him from Illinois&mdash;got
+ him of a man by the name of Yates&mdash;Bill Yates&mdash;maybe you might
+ have heard of him; his father was a deacon&mdash;Baptist&mdash;and he was
+ a rustler, too; a man had to get up ruther early to get the start of old
+ Thankful Yates; it was him that put the Greens up to jining teams with my
+ grandfather when he moved west.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ 'Seth Green was prob'ly the pick of the flock; he married a Wilkerson&mdash;Sarah
+ Wilkerson&mdash;good cretur, she was&mdash;one of the likeliest heifers
+ that was ever raised in old Stoddard, everybody said that knowed her. She
+ could heft a bar'l of flour as easy as I can flirt a flapjack. And spin?
+ Don't mention it! Independent? Humph! When Sile Hawkins come a browsing
+ around her, she let him know that for all his tin he couldn't trot in
+ harness alongside of her. You see, Sile Hawkins was&mdash;no, it warn't
+ Sile Hawkins, after all&mdash;it was a galoot by the name of Filkins&mdash;I
+ disremember his first name; but he was a stump&mdash;come into pra'r
+ meeting drunk, one night, hooraying for Nixon, becuz he thought it was a
+ primary; and old deacon Ferguson up and scooted him through the window and
+ he lit on old Miss Jefferson's head, poor old filly.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link385" id="link385"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="385.jpg (52K)" src="images/385.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ She was a good soul&mdash;had a glass eye and used to lend it to old Miss
+ Wagner, that hadn't any, to receive company in; it warn't big enough, and
+ when Miss Wagner warn't noticing, it would get twisted around in the
+ socket, and look up, maybe, or out to one side, and every which way, while
+ t' other one was looking as straight ahead as a spy-glass.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ 'Grown people didn't mind it, but it most always made the children cry, it
+ was so sort of scary. She tried packing it in raw cotton, but it wouldn't
+ work, somehow&mdash;the cotton would get loose and stick out and look so
+ kind of awful that the children couldn't stand it no way.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link386" id="link386"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="386.jpg (26K)" src="images/386.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ She was always dropping it out, and turning up her old dead-light on the
+ company empty, and making them oncomfortable, becuz she never could tell
+ when it hopped out, being blind on that side, you see. So somebody would
+ have to hunch her and say, "Your game eye has fetched loose. Miss Wagner
+ dear"&mdash;and then all of them would have to sit and wait till she
+ jammed it in again&mdash;wrong side before, as a general thing, and green
+ as a bird's egg, being a bashful cretur and easy sot back before company.
+ But being wrong side before warn't much difference, anyway; becuz her own
+ eye was sky- blue and the glass one was yaller on the front side, so
+ whichever way she turned it it didn't match nohow.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ 'Old Miss Wagner was considerable on the borrow, she was. When she had a
+ quilting, or Dorcas S'iety at her house she gen'ally borrowed Miss
+ Higgins's wooden leg to stump around on; it was considerable shorter than
+ her other pin, but much she minded that. She said she couldn't abide
+ crutches when she had company, becuz they were so slow; said when she had
+ company and things had to be done, she wanted to get up and hump herself.
+ She was as bald as a jug, and so she used to borrow Miss Jacops's wig&mdash;Miss
+ Jacops was the coffin-peddler's wife&mdash;a ratty old buzzard, he was,
+ that used to go roosting around where people was sick, waiting for 'em;
+ and there that old rip would sit all day, in the shade, on a coffin that
+ he judged would fit the can'idate; and if it was a slow customer and kind
+ of uncertain, he'd fetch his rations and a blanket along and sleep in the
+ coffin nights. He was anchored out that way, in frosty weather, for about
+ three weeks, once, before old Robbins's place, waiting for him; and after
+ that, for as much as two years, Jacops was not on speaking terms with the
+ old man, on account of his disapp'inting him. He got one of his feet
+ froze, and lost money, too, becuz old Robbins took a favorable turn and
+ got well.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link387" id="link387"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="387.jpg (61K)" src="images/387.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The next time Robbins got sick, Jacops tried to make up with him, and
+ varnished up the same old coffin and fetched it along; but old Robbins was
+ too many for him; he had him in, and 'peared to be powerful weak; he
+ bought the coffin for ten dollars and Jacops was to pay it back and
+ twenty-five more besides if Robbins didn't like the coffin after he'd
+ tried it. And then Robbins died, and at the funeral he bursted off the lid
+ and riz up in his shroud and told the parson to let up on the
+ performances, becuz he could not stand such a coffin as that. You see he
+ had been in a trance once before, when he was young, and he took the
+ chances on another, cal'lating that if he made the trip it was money in
+ his pocket, and if he missed fire he couldn't lose a cent. And by George
+ he sued Jacops for the rhino and got jedgment; and he set up the coffin in
+ his back parlor and said he 'lowed to take his time, now. It was always an
+ aggravation to Jacops, the way that miserable old thing acted. He moved
+ back to Indiany pretty soon&mdash;went to Wellsville&mdash;Wellsville was
+ the place the Hogadorns was from. Mighty fine family. Old Maryland stock.
+ Old Squire Hogadorn could carry around more mixed licker, and cuss better
+ than most any man I ever see. His second wife was the widder Billings&mdash;she
+ that was Becky Martin; her dam was deacon Dunlap's first wife. Her oldest
+ child, Maria, married a missionary and died in grace&mdash;et up by the
+ savages. They et him, too, poor feller&mdash;biled him. It warn't the
+ custom, so they say, but they explained to friends of his'n that went down
+ there to bring away his things, that they'd tried missionaries every other
+ way and never could get any good out of 'em&mdash;and so it annoyed all
+ his relations to find out that that man's life was fooled away just out of
+ a dern'd experiment, so to speak. But mind you, there ain't anything ever
+ reely lost; everything that people can't understand and don't see the
+ reason of does good if you only hold on and give it a fair shake;
+ Prov'dence don't fire no blank ca'tridges, boys. That there missionary's
+ substance, unbeknowns to himself, actu'ly converted every last one of them
+ heathens that took a chance at the barbacue. Nothing ever fetched them but
+ that. Don't tell me it was an accident that he was biled. There ain't no
+ such a thing as an accident.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link388" id="link388"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="388.jpg (43K)" src="images/388.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ 'When my uncle Lem was leaning up agin a scaffolding once, sick, or drunk,
+ or suthin, an Irishman with a hod full of bricks fell on him out of the
+ third story and broke the old man's back in two places. People said it was
+ an accident. Much accident there was about that. He didn't know what he
+ was there for, but he was there for a good object. If he hadn't been there
+ the Irishman would have been killed. Nobody can ever make me believe
+ anything different from that. Uncle Lem's dog was there. Why didn't the
+ Irishman fall on the dog? Becuz the dog would a seen him a coming and
+ stood from under. That's the reason the dog warn't appinted. A dog can't
+ be depended on to carry out a special providence. Mark my words it was a
+ put-up thing. Accidents don't happen, boys. Uncle Lem's dog&mdash;I wish
+ you could a seen that dog. He was a reglar shepherd&mdash;or ruther he was
+ part bull and part shepherd&mdash;splendid animal; belonged to parson
+ Hagar before Uncle Lem got him. Parson Hagar belonged to the Western
+ Reserve Hagars; prime family; his mother was a Watson; one of his sisters
+ married a Wheeler; they settled in Morgan county, and he got nipped by the
+ machinery in a carpet factory and went through in less than a quarter of a
+ minute; his widder bought the piece of carpet that had his remains wove
+ in, and people come a hundred mile to 'tend the funeral. There was
+ fourteen yards in the piece.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ 'She wouldn't let them roll him up, but planted him just so&mdash;full
+ length. The church was middling small where they preached the funeral, and
+ they had to let one end of the coffin stick out of the window. They didn't
+ bury him&mdash;they planted one end, and let him stand up, same as a
+ monument. And they nailed a sign on it and put&mdash;put on&mdash;put on
+ it&mdash;"sacred to&mdash;the m-e-m-o-r-y&mdash;of fourteen y-a-r-d-s&mdash;of
+ three-ply&mdash;car&mdash;-pet&mdash;containing all that was&mdash;m-o-r-t-a-l&mdash;of&mdash;of&mdash;W-i-l-l-i-a-m&mdash;W-h-e&mdash;"'
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link389" id="link389"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="389.jpg (111K)" src="images/389.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Jim Blaine had been growing gradually drowsy and drowsier&mdash;his head
+ nodded, once, twice, three times&mdash;dropped peacefully upon his breast,
+ and he fell tranquilly asleep. The tears were running down the boys'
+ cheeks&mdash;they were suffocating with suppressed laughter&mdash;and had
+ been from the start, though I had never noticed it. I perceived that I was
+ "sold." I learned then that Jim Blaine's peculiarity was that whenever he
+ reached a certain stage of intoxication, no human power could keep him
+ from setting out, with impressive unction, to tell about a wonderful
+ adventure which he had once had with his grandfather's old ram&mdash;and
+ the mention of the ram in the first sentence was as far as any man had
+ ever heard him get, concerning it. He always maundered off, interminably,
+ from one thing to another, till his whisky got the best of him and he fell
+ asleep. What the thing was that happened to him and his grandfather's old
+ ram is a dark mystery to this day, for nobody has ever yet found out.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link390" id="link390"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="390.jpg (64K)" src="images/390.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch54" id="linkch54"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LIV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Of course there was a large Chinese population in Virginia&mdash;it is the
+ case with every town and city on the Pacific coast. They are a harmless
+ race when white men either let them alone or treat them no worse than
+ dogs; in fact they are almost entirely harmless anyhow, for they seldom
+ think of resenting the vilest insults or the cruelest injuries. They are
+ quiet, peaceable, tractable, free from drunkenness, and they are as
+ industrious as the day is long. A disorderly Chinaman is rare, and a lazy
+ one does not exist. So long as a Chinaman has strength to use his hands he
+ needs no support from anybody; white men often complain of want of work,
+ but a Chinaman offers no such complaint; he always manages to find
+ something to do. He is a great convenience to everybody&mdash;even to the
+ worst class of white men, for he bears the most of their sins, suffering
+ fines for their petty thefts, imprisonment for their robberies, and death
+ for their murders. Any white man can swear a Chinaman's life away in the
+ courts, but no Chinaman can testify against a white man. Ours is the "land
+ of the free"&mdash;nobody denies that&mdash;nobody challenges it. [Maybe
+ it is because we won't let other people testify.] As I write, news comes
+ that in broad daylight in San Francisco, some boys have stoned an
+ inoffensive Chinaman to death, and that although a large crowd witnessed
+ the shameful deed, no one interfered.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There are seventy thousand (and possibly one hundred thousand) Chinamen on
+ the Pacific coast. There were about a thousand in Virginia. They were
+ penned into a "Chinese quarter"&mdash;a thing which they do not
+ particularly object to, as they are fond of herding together. Their
+ buildings were of wood; usually only one story high, and set thickly
+ together along streets scarcely wide enough for a wagon to pass through.
+ Their quarter was a little removed from the rest of the town. The chief
+ employment of Chinamen in towns is to wash clothing. They always send a
+ bill, like this below, pinned to the clothes. It is mere ceremony, for it
+ does not enlighten the customer much.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link392" id="link392"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="392.jpg (12K)" src="images/392.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Their price for washing was $2.50 per dozen&mdash;rather cheaper than
+ white people could afford to wash for at that time. A very common sign on
+ the Chinese houses was: "See Yup, Washer and Ironer"; "Hong Wo, Washer";
+ "Sam Sing &amp; Ah Hop, Washing." The house servants, cooks, etc., in
+ California and Nevada, were chiefly Chinamen. There were few white
+ servants and no Chinawomen so employed. Chinamen make good house servants,
+ being quick, obedient, patient, quick to learn and tirelessly industrious.
+ They do not need to be taught a thing twice, as a general thing. They are
+ imitative. If a Chinaman were to see his master break up a centre table,
+ in a passion, and kindle a fire with it, that Chinaman would be likely to
+ resort to the furniture for fuel forever afterward.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link393" id="link393"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="393.jpg (42K)" src="images/393.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ All Chinamen can read, write and cipher with easy facility&mdash;pity but
+ all our petted voters could. In California they rent little patches of
+ ground and do a deal of gardening. They will raise surprising crops of
+ vegetables on a sand pile. They waste nothing. What is rubbish to a
+ Christian, a Chinaman carefully preserves and makes useful in one way or
+ another. He gathers up all the old oyster and sardine cans that white
+ people throw away, and procures marketable tin and solder from them by
+ melting. He gathers up old bones and turns them into manure. In California
+ he gets a living out of old mining claims that white men have abandoned as
+ exhausted and worthless&mdash;and then the officers come down on him once
+ a month with an exorbitant swindle to which the legislature has given the
+ broad, general name of "foreign" mining tax, but it is usually inflicted
+ on no foreigners but Chinamen. This swindle has in some cases been
+ repeated once or twice on the same victim in the course of the same month&mdash;but
+ the public treasury was no additionally enriched by it, probably.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Chinamen hold their dead in great reverence&mdash;they worship their
+ departed ancestors, in fact. Hence, in China, a man's front yard, back
+ yard, or any other part of his premises, is made his family burying
+ ground, in order that he may visit the graves at any and all times.
+ Therefore that huge empire is one mighty cemetery; it is ridged and
+ wringled from its centre to its circumference with graves&mdash;and
+ inasmuch as every foot of ground must be made to do its utmost, in China,
+ lest the swarming population suffer for food, the very graves are
+ cultivated and yield a harvest, custom holding this to be no dishonor to
+ the dead. Since the departed are held in such worshipful reverence, a
+ Chinaman cannot bear that any indignity be offered the places where they
+ sleep. Mr. Burlingame said that herein lay China's bitter opposition to
+ railroads; a road could not be built anywhere in the empire without
+ disturbing the graves of their ancestors or friends.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A Chinaman hardly believes he could enjoy the hereafter except his body
+ lay in his beloved China; also, he desires to receive, himself, after
+ death, that worship with which he has honored his dead that preceded him.
+ Therefore, if he visits a foreign country, he makes arrangements to have
+ his bones returned to China in case he dies; if he hires to go to a
+ foreign country on a labor contract, there is always a stipulation that
+ his body shall be taken back to China if he dies; if the government sells
+ a gang of Coolies to a foreigner for the usual five-year term, it is
+ specified in the contract that their bodies shall be restored to China in
+ case of death. On the Pacific coast the Chinamen all belong to one or
+ another of several great companies or organizations, and these companies
+ keep track of their members, register their names, and ship their bodies
+ home when they die. The See Yup Company is held to be the largest of
+ these. The Ning Yeong Company is next, and numbers eighteen thousand
+ members on the coast. Its headquarters are at San Francisco, where it has
+ a costly temple, several great officers (one of whom keeps regal state in
+ seclusion and cannot be approached by common humanity), and a numerous
+ priesthood. In it I was shown a register of its members, with the dead and
+ the date of their shipment to China duly marked. Every ship that sails
+ from San Francisco carries away a heavy freight of Chinese corpses&mdash;or
+ did, at least, until the legislature, with an ingenious refinement of
+ Christian cruelty, forbade the shipments, as a neat underhanded way of
+ deterring Chinese immigration. The bill was offered, whether it passed or
+ not. It is my impression that it passed. There was another bill&mdash;it
+ became a law&mdash;compelling every incoming Chinaman to be vaccinated on
+ the wharf and pay a duly appointed quack (no decent doctor would defile
+ himself with such legalized robbery) ten dollars for it. As few importers
+ of Chinese would want to go to an expense like that, the law-makers
+ thought this would be another heavy blow to Chinese immigration.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ What the Chinese quarter of Virginia was like&mdash;or, indeed, what the
+ Chinese quarter of any Pacific coast town was and is like&mdash;may be
+ gathered from this item which I printed in the Enterprise while reporting
+ for that paper:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ CHINATOWN.&mdash;Accompanied by a fellow reporter, we made a trip
+ through our Chinese quarter the other night. The Chinese have built
+ their portion of the city to suit themselves; and as they keep neither
+ carriages nor wagons, their streets are not wide enough, as a general
+ thing, to admit of the passage of vehicles. At ten o'clock at night the
+ Chinaman may be seen in all his glory. In every little cooped-up, dingy
+ cavern of a hut, faint with the odor of burning Josh-lights and with
+ nothing to see the gloom by save the sickly, guttering tallow candle,
+ were two or three yellow, long-tailed vagabonds, coiled up on a sort of
+ short truckle-bed, smoking opium, motionless and with their lustreless
+ eyes turned inward from excess of satisfaction&mdash;or rather the
+ recent smoker looks thus, immediately after having passed the pipe to
+ his neighbor&mdash;for opium-smoking is a comfortless operation, and
+ requires constant attention. A lamp sits on the bed, the length of the
+ long pipe-stem from the smoker's mouth; he puts a pellet of opium on the
+ end of a wire, sets it on fire, and plasters it into the pipe much as a
+ Christian would fill a hole with putty; then he applies the bowl to the
+ lamp and proceeds to smoke&mdash;and the stewing and frying of the drug
+ and the gurgling of the juices in the stem would well-nigh turn the
+ stomach of a statue. John likes it, though; it soothes him, he takes
+ about two dozen whiffs, and then rolls over to dream, Heaven only knows
+ what, for we could not imagine by looking at the soggy creature.
+ Possibly in his visions he travels far away from the gross world and his
+ regular washing, and feast on succulent rats and birds'-nests in
+ Paradise.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Mr. Ah Sing keeps a general grocery and provision store at No. 13 Wang
+ street. He lavished his hospitality upon our party in the friendliest
+ way. He had various kinds of colored and colorless wines and brandies,
+ with unpronouncable names, imported from China in little crockery jugs,
+ and which he offered to us in dainty little miniature wash-basins of
+ porcelain. He offered us a mess of birds'-nests; also, small, neat
+ sausages, of which we could have swallowed several yards if we had
+ chosen to try, but we suspected that each link contained the corpse of a
+ mouse, and therefore refrained. Mr. Sing had in his store a thousand
+ articles of merchandise, curious to behold, impossible to imagine the
+ uses of, and beyond our ability to describe.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ His ducks, however, and his eggs, we could understand; the former were
+ split open and flattened out like codfish, and came from China in that
+ shape, and the latter were plastered over with some kind of paste which
+ kept them fresh and palatable through the long voyage.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We found Mr. Hong Wo, No. 37 Chow-chow street, making up a lottery
+ scheme&mdash;in fact we found a dozen others occupied in the same way in
+ various parts of the quarter, for about every third Chinaman runs a
+ lottery, and the balance of the tribe "buck" at it. "Tom," who speaks
+ faultless English, and used to be chief and only cook to the Territorial
+ Enterprise, when the establishment kept bachelor's hall two years ago,
+ said that "Sometime Chinaman buy ticket one dollar hap, ketch um two
+ tree hundred, sometime no ketch um anything; lottery like one man fight
+ um seventy&mdash;may-be he whip, may-be he get whip heself, welly good."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link396" id="link396"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="396.jpg (69K)" src="images/396.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ However, the percentage being sixty-nine against him, the chances are,
+ as a general thing, that "he get whip heself." We could not see that
+ these lotteries differed in any respect from our own, save that the
+ figures being Chinese, no ignorant white man might ever hope to succeed
+ in telling "t'other from which;" the manner of drawing is similar to
+ ours.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Mr. See Yup keeps a fancy store on Live Fox street. He sold us fans of
+ white feathers, gorgeously ornamented; perfumery that smelled like
+ Limburger cheese, Chinese pens, and watch-charms made of a stone
+ unscratchable with steel instruments, yet polished and tinted like the
+ inner coat of a sea-shell. As tokens of his esteem, See Yup presented
+ the party with gaudy plumes made of gold tinsel and trimmed with
+ peacocks' feathers.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We ate chow-chow with chop-sticks in the celestial restaurants; our
+ comrade chided the moon-eyed damsels in front of the houses for their
+ want of feminine reserve; we received protecting Josh-lights from our
+ hosts and "dickered" for a pagan God or two. Finally, we were impressed
+ with the genius of a Chinese book-keeper; he figured up his accounts on
+ a machine like a gridiron with buttons strung on its bars; the different
+ rows represented units, tens, hundreds and thousands. He fingered them
+ with incredible rapidity&mdash;in fact, he pushed them from place to
+ place as fast as a musical professor's fingers travel over the keys of a
+ piano.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ They are a kindly disposed, well-meaning race, and are respected and well
+ treated by the upper classes, all over the Pacific coast. No Californian
+ gentleman or lady ever abuses or oppresses a Chinaman, under any
+ circumstances, an explanation that seems to be much needed in the East.
+ Only the scum of the population do it&mdash;they and their children; they,
+ and, naturally and consistently, the policemen and politicians, likewise,
+ for these are the dust-licking pimps and slaves of the scum, there as well
+ as elsewhere in America.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link397" id="link397"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="397.jpg (76K)" src="images/397.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch55" id="linkch55"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I began to get tired of staying in one place so long.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There was no longer satisfying variety in going down to Carson to report
+ the proceedings of the legislature once a year, and horse-races and
+ pumpkin-shows once in three months; (they had got to raising pumpkins and
+ potatoes in Washoe Valley, and of course one of the first achievements of
+ the legislature was to institute a ten-thousand-dollar Agricultural Fair
+ to show off forty dollars' worth of those pumpkins in&mdash;however, the
+ territorial legislature was usually spoken of as the "asylum"). I wanted
+ to see San Francisco. I wanted to go somewhere. I wanted&mdash;I did not
+ know what I wanted. I had the "spring fever" and wanted a change,
+ principally, no doubt. Besides, a convention had framed a State
+ Constitution; nine men out of every ten wanted an office; I believed that
+ these gentlemen would "treat" the moneyless and the irresponsible among
+ the population into adopting the constitution and thus well-nigh killing
+ the country (it could not well carry such a load as a State government,
+ since it had nothing to tax that could stand a tax, for undeveloped mines
+ could not, and there were not fifty developed ones in the land, there was
+ but little realty to tax, and it did seem as if nobody was ever going to
+ think of the simple salvation of inflicting a money penalty on murder). I
+ believed that a State government would destroy the "flush times," and I
+ wanted to get away. I believed that the mining stocks I had on hand would
+ soon be worth $100,000, and thought if they reached that before the
+ Constitution was adopted, I would sell out and make myself secure from the
+ crash the change of government was going to bring. I considered $100,000
+ sufficient to go home with decently, though it was but a small amount
+ compared to what I had been expecting to return with. I felt rather
+ down-hearted about it, but I tried to comfort myself with the reflection
+ that with such a sum I could not fall into want. About this time a
+ schoolmate of mine whom I had not seen since boyhood, came tramping in on
+ foot from Reese River, a very allegory of Poverty. The son of wealthy
+ parents, here he was, in a strange land, hungry, bootless, mantled in an
+ ancient horse-blanket, roofed with a brimless hat, and so generally and so
+ extravagantly dilapidated that he could have "taken the shine out of the
+ Prodigal Son himself," as he pleasantly remarked.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link399" id="link399"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="399.jpg (43K)" src="images/399.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He wanted to borrow forty-six dollars&mdash;twenty-six to take him to San
+ Francisco, and twenty for something else; to buy some soap with, maybe,
+ for he needed it. I found I had but little more than the amount wanted, in
+ my pocket; so I stepped in and borrowed forty-six dollars of a banker (on
+ twenty days' time, without the formality of a note), and gave it him,
+ rather than walk half a block to the office, where I had some specie laid
+ up. If anybody had told me that it would take me two years to pay back
+ that forty-six dollars to the banker (for I did not expect it of the
+ Prodigal, and was not disappointed), I would have felt injured. And so
+ would the banker.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I wanted a change. I wanted variety of some kind. It came. Mr. Goodman
+ went away for a week and left me the post of chief editor. It destroyed
+ me. The first day, I wrote my "leader" in the forenoon. The second day, I
+ had no subject and put it off till the afternoon. The third day I put it
+ off till evening, and then copied an elaborate editorial out of the
+ "American Cyclopedia," that steadfast friend of the editor, all over this
+ land. The fourth day I "fooled around" till midnight, and then fell back
+ on the Cyclopedia again. The fifth day I cudgeled my brain till midnight,
+ and then kept the press waiting while I penned some bitter personalities
+ on six different people. The sixth day I labored in anguish till far into
+ the night and brought forth&mdash;nothing. The paper went to press without
+ an editorial. The seventh day I resigned. On the eighth, Mr. Goodman
+ returned and found six duels on his hands&mdash;my personalities had borne
+ fruit.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Nobody, except he has tried it, knows what it is to be an editor. It is
+ easy to scribble local rubbish, with the facts all before you; it is easy
+ to clip selections from other papers; it is easy to string out a
+ correspondence from any locality; but it is unspeakable hardship to write
+ editorials. Subjects are the trouble&mdash;the dreary lack of them, I
+ mean. Every day, it is drag, drag, drag&mdash;think, and worry and suffer&mdash;all
+ the world is a dull blank, and yet the editorial columns must be filled.
+ Only give the editor a subject, and his work is done&mdash;it is no
+ trouble to write it up; but fancy how you would feel if you had to pump
+ your brains dry every day in the week, fifty-two weeks in the year. It
+ makes one low spirited simply to think of it. The matter that each editor
+ of a daily paper in America writes in the course of a year would fill from
+ four to eight bulky volumes like this book! Fancy what a library an
+ editor's work would make, after twenty or thirty years' service. Yet
+ people often marvel that Dickens, Scott, Bulwer, Dumas, etc., have been
+ able to produce so many books. If these authors had wrought as
+ voluminously as newspaper editors do, the result would be something to
+ marvel at, indeed. How editors can continue this tremendous labor, this
+ exhausting consumption of brain fibre (for their work is creative, and not
+ a mere mechanical laying-up of facts, like reporting), day after day and
+ year after year, is incomprehensible. Preachers take two months' holiday
+ in midsummer, for they find that to produce two sermons a week is wearing,
+ in the long run. In truth it must be so, and is so; and therefore, how an
+ editor can take from ten to twenty texts and build upon them from ten to
+ twenty painstaking editorials a week and keep it up all the year round, is
+ farther beyond comprehension than ever. Ever since I survived my week as
+ editor, I have found at least one pleasure in any newspaper that comes to
+ my hand; it is in admiring the long columns of editorial, and wondering to
+ myself how in the mischief he did it!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Mr. Goodman's return relieved me of employment, unless I chose to become a
+ reporter again. I could not do that; I could not serve in the ranks after
+ being General of the army. So I thought I would depart and go abroad into
+ the world somewhere. Just at this juncture, Dan, my associate in the
+ reportorial department, told me, casually, that two citizens had been
+ trying to persuade him to go with them to New York and aid in selling a
+ rich silver mine which they had discovered and secured in a new mining
+ district in our neighborhood. He said they offered to pay his expenses and
+ give him one third of the proceeds of the sale. He had refused to go. It
+ was the very opportunity I wanted. I abused him for keeping so quiet about
+ it, and not mentioning it sooner. He said it had not occurred to him that
+ I would like to go, and so he had recommended them to apply to Marshall,
+ the reporter of the other paper. I asked Dan if it was a good, honest
+ mine, and no swindle. He said the men had shown him nine tons of the rock,
+ which they had got out to take to New York, and he could cheerfully say
+ that he had seen but little rock in Nevada that was richer; and moreover,
+ he said that they had secured a tract of valuable timber and a mill-site,
+ near the mine. My first idea was to kill Dan. But I changed my mind,
+ notwithstanding I was so angry, for I thought maybe the chance was not yet
+ lost. Dan said it was by no means lost; that the men were absent at the
+ mine again, and would not be in Virginia to leave for the East for some
+ ten days; that they had requested him to do the talking to Marshall, and
+ he had promised that he would either secure Marshall or somebody else for
+ them by the time they got back; he would now say nothing to anybody till
+ they returned, and then fulfil his promise by furnishing me to them.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was splendid. I went to bed all on fire with excitement; for nobody had
+ yet gone East to sell a Nevada silver mine, and the field was white for
+ the sickle. I felt that such a mine as the one described by Dan would
+ bring a princely sum in New York, and sell without delay or difficulty. I
+ could not sleep, my fancy so rioted through its castles in the air. It was
+ the "blind lead" come again.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next day I got away, on the coach, with the usual eclat attending
+ departures of old citizens,&mdash;for if you have only half a dozen
+ friends out there they will make noise for a hundred rather than let you
+ seem to go away neglected and unregretted&mdash;and Dan promised to keep
+ strict watch for the men that had the mine to sell.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The trip was signalized but by one little incident, and that occurred just
+ as we were about to start. A very seedy looking vagabond passenger got out
+ of the stage a moment to wait till the usual ballast of silver bricks was
+ thrown in. He was standing on the pavement, when an awkward express
+ employee, carrying a brick weighing a hundred pounds, stumbled and let it
+ fall on the bummer's foot. He instantly dropped on the ground and began to
+ howl in the most heart-breaking way. A sympathizing crowd gathered around
+ and were going to pull his boot off; but he screamed louder than ever and
+ they desisted; then he fell to gasping, and between the gasps ejaculated
+ "Brandy! for Heaven's sake, brandy!" They poured half a pint down him, and
+ it wonderfully restored and comforted him. Then he begged the people to
+ assist him to the stage, which was done. The express people urged him to
+ have a doctor at their expense, but he declined, and said that if he only
+ had a little brandy to take along with him, to soothe his paroxyms of pain
+ when they came on, he would be grateful and content. He was quickly
+ supplied with two bottles, and we drove off. He was so smiling and happy
+ after that, that I could not refrain from asking him how he could possibly
+ be so comfortable with a crushed foot.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link403" id="link403"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="403.jpg (72K)" src="images/403.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well," said he, "I hadn't had a drink for twelve hours, and hadn't a cent
+ to my name. I was most perishing&mdash;and so, when that duffer dropped
+ that hundred-pounder on my foot, I see my chance. Got a cork leg, you
+ know!" and he pulled up his pantaloons and proved it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He was as drunk as a lord all day long, and full of chucklings over his
+ timely ingenuity.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One drunken man necessarily reminds one of another. I once heard a
+ gentleman tell about an incident which he witnessed in a Californian bar-
+ room. He entitled it "Ye Modest Man Taketh a Drink." It was nothing but a
+ bit of acting, but it seemed to me a perfect rendering, and worthy of
+ Toodles himself. The modest man, tolerably far gone with beer and other
+ matters, enters a saloon (twenty-five cents is the price for anything and
+ everything, and specie the only money used) and lays down a half dollar;
+ calls for whiskey and drinks it; the bar-keeper makes change and lays the
+ quarter in a wet place on the counter; the modest man fumbles at it with
+ nerveless fingers, but it slips and the water holds it; he contemplates
+ it, and tries again; same result; observes that people are interested in
+ what he is at, blushes; fumbles at the quarter again&mdash;blushes&mdash;puts
+ his forefinger carefully, slowly down, to make sure of his aim&mdash;pushes
+ the coin toward the bar-keeper, and says with a sigh:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link404" id="link404"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="404.jpg (120K)" src="images/404.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gimme a cigar!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Naturally, another gentleman present told about another drunken man. He
+ said he reeled toward home late at night; made a mistake and entered the
+ wrong gate; thought he saw a dog on the stoop; and it was&mdash;an iron
+ one.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He stopped and considered; wondered if it was a dangerous dog; ventured to
+ say "Be (hic) begone!" No effect. Then he approached warily, and adopted
+ conciliation; pursed up his lips and tried to whistle, but failed; still
+ approached, saying, "Poor dog!&mdash;doggy, doggy, doggy!&mdash;poor
+ doggy-dog!" Got up on the stoop, still petting with fond names; till
+ master of the advantages; then exclaimed, "Leave, you thief!"&mdash;planted
+ a vindictive kick in his ribs, and went head-over-heels overboard, of
+ course. A pause; a sigh or two of pain, and then a remark in a reflective
+ voice:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Awful solid dog. What could he ben eating? ('ic!) Rocks, p'raps. Such
+ animals is dangerous.&mdash;' At's what I say&mdash;they're dangerous. If
+ a man&mdash;('ic!)&mdash;if a man wants to feed a dog on rocks, let him
+ feed him on rocks; 'at's all right; but let him keep him at home&mdash;not
+ have him layin' round promiscuous, where ('ic!) where people's liable to
+ stumble over him when they ain't noticin'!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was not without regret that I took a last look at the tiny flag (it was
+ thirty-five feet long and ten feet wide) fluttering like a lady's
+ handkerchief from the topmost peak of Mount Davidson, two thousand feet
+ above Virginia's roofs, and felt that doubtless I was bidding a permanent
+ farewell to a city which had afforded me the most vigorous enjoyment of
+ life I had ever experienced. And this reminds me of an incident which the
+ dullest memory Virginia could boast at the time it happened must vividly
+ recall, at times, till its possessor dies. Late one summer afternoon we
+ had a rain shower.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ That was astonishing enough, in itself, to set the whole town buzzing, for
+ it only rains (during a week or two weeks) in the winter in Nevada, and
+ even then not enough at a time to make it worth while for any merchant to
+ keep umbrellas for sale. But the rain was not the chief wonder. It only
+ lasted five or ten minutes; while the people were still talking about it
+ all the heavens gathered to themselves a dense blackness as of midnight.
+ All the vast eastern front of Mount Davidson, over- looking the city, put
+ on such a funereal gloom that only the nearness and solidity of the
+ mountain made its outlines even faintly distinguishable from the dead
+ blackness of the heavens they rested against. This unaccustomed sight
+ turned all eyes toward the mountain; and as they looked, a little tongue
+ of rich golden flame was seen waving and quivering in the heart of the
+ midnight, away up on the extreme summit! In a few minutes the streets were
+ packed with people, gazing with hardly an uttered word, at the one
+ brilliant mote in the brooding world of darkness. It flicked like a
+ candle-flame, and looked no larger; but with such a background it was
+ wonderfully bright, small as it was. It was the flag!&mdash;though no one
+ suspected it at first, it seemed so like a supernatural visitor of some
+ kind&mdash;a mysterious messenger of good tidings, some were fain to
+ believe. It was the nation's emblem transfigured by the departing rays of
+ a sun that was entirely palled from view; and on no other object did the
+ glory fall, in all the broad panorama of mountain ranges and deserts. Not
+ even upon the staff of the flag&mdash;for that, a needle in the distance
+ at any time, was now untouched by the light and undistinguishable in the
+ gloom. For a whole hour the weird visitor winked and burned in its lofty
+ solitude, and still the thousands of uplifted eyes watched it with
+ fascinated interest. How the people were wrought up! The superstition grew
+ apace that this was a mystic courier come with great news from the war&mdash;the
+ poetry of the idea excusing and commending it&mdash;and on it spread, from
+ heart to heart, from lip to lip and from street to street, till there was
+ a general impulse to have out the military and welcome the bright waif
+ with a salvo of artillery!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link406" id="link406"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="406.jpg (72K)" src="images/406.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And all that time one sorely tried man, the telegraph operator sworn to
+ official secrecy, had to lock his lips and chain his tongue with a silence
+ that was like to rend them; for he, and he only, of all the speculating
+ multitude, knew the great things this sinking sun had seen that day in the
+ east&mdash;Vicksburg fallen, and the Union arms victorious at Gettysburg!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But for the journalistic monopoly that forbade the slightest revealment of
+ eastern news till a day after its publication in the California papers,
+ the glorified flag on Mount Davidson would have been saluted and
+ re-saluted, that memorable evening, as long as there was a charge of
+ powder to thunder with; the city would have been illuminated, and every
+ man that had any respect for himself would have got drunk,&mdash;as was
+ the custom of the country on all occasions of public moment. Even at this
+ distant day I cannot think of this needlessly marred supreme opportunity
+ without regret. What a time we might have had!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link407" id="link407"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="407.jpg (12K)" src="images/407.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch56" id="linkch56"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LVI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We rumbled over the plains and valleys, climbed the Sierras to the clouds,
+ and looked down upon summer-clad California. And I will remark here, in
+ passing, that all scenery in California requires distance to give it its
+ highest charm. The mountains are imposing in their sublimity and their
+ majesty of form and altitude, from any point of view&mdash;but one must
+ have distance to soften their ruggedness and enrich their tintings; a
+ Californian forest is best at a little distance, for there is a sad
+ poverty of variety in species, the trees being chiefly of one monotonous
+ family&mdash;redwood, pine, spruce, fir&mdash;and so, at a near view there
+ is a wearisome sameness of attitude in their rigid arms, stretched down
+ ward and outward in one continued and reiterated appeal to all men to "Sh!&mdash;don't
+ say a word!&mdash;you might disturb somebody!" Close at hand, too, there
+ is a reliefless and relentless smell of pitch and turpentine; there is a
+ ceaseless melancholy in their sighing and complaining foliage; one walks
+ over a soundless carpet of beaten yellow bark and dead spines of the
+ foliage till he feels like a wandering spirit bereft of a footfall; he
+ tires of the endless tufts of needles and yearns for substantial, shapely
+ leaves; he looks for moss and grass to loll upon, and finds none, for
+ where there is no bark there is naked clay and dirt, enemies to pensive
+ musing and clean apparel. Often a grassy plain in California, is what it
+ should be, but often, too, it is best contemplated at a distance, because
+ although its grass blades are tall, they stand up vindictively straight
+ and self-sufficient, and are unsociably wide apart, with uncomely spots of
+ barren sand between.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One of the queerest things I know of, is to hear tourists from "the
+ States" go into ecstasies over the loveliness of "ever-blooming
+ California." And they always do go into that sort of ecstasies. But
+ perhaps they would modify them if they knew how old Californians, with the
+ memory full upon them of the dust-covered and questionable summer greens
+ of Californian "verdure," stand astonished, and filled with worshipping
+ admiration, in the presence of the lavish richness, the brilliant green,
+ the infinite freshness, the spend-thrift variety of form and species and
+ foliage that make an Eastern landscape a vision of Paradise itself. The
+ idea of a man falling into raptures over grave and sombre California, when
+ that man has seen New England's meadow-expanses and her maples, oaks and
+ cathedral-windowed elms decked in summer attire, or the opaline splendors
+ of autumn descending upon her forests, comes very near being funny&mdash;would
+ be, in fact, but that it is so pathetic. No land with an unvarying climate
+ can be very beautiful. The tropics are not, for all the sentiment that is
+ wasted on them. They seem beautiful at first, but sameness impairs the
+ charm by and by. Change is the handmaiden Nature requires to do her
+ miracles with. The land that has four well-defined seasons, cannot lack
+ beauty, or pall with monotony. Each season brings a world of enjoyment and
+ interest in the watching of its unfolding, its gradual, harmonious
+ development, its culminating graces&mdash;and just as one begins to tire
+ of it, it passes away and a radical change comes, with new witcheries and
+ new glories in its train. And I think that to one in sympathy with nature,
+ each season, in its turn, seems the loveliest.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link409" id="link409"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="409.jpg (49K)" src="images/409.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ San Francisco, a truly fascinating city to live in, is stately and
+ handsome at a fair distance, but close at hand one notes that the
+ architecture is mostly old-fashioned, many streets are made up of
+ decaying, smoke-grimed, wooden houses, and the barren sand-hills toward
+ the outskirts obtrude themselves too prominently. Even the kindly climate
+ is sometimes pleasanter when read about than personally experienced, for a
+ lovely, cloudless sky wears out its welcome by and by, and then when the
+ longed for rain does come it stays. Even the playful earthquake is better
+ contemplated at a dis&mdash;
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ However there are varying opinions about that.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The climate of San Francisco is mild and singularly equable. The
+ thermometer stands at about seventy degrees the year round. It hardly
+ changes at all. You sleep under one or two light blankets Summer and
+ Winter, and never use a mosquito bar. Nobody ever wears Summer clothing.
+ You wear black broadcloth&mdash;if you have it&mdash;in August and
+ January, just the same. It is no colder, and no warmer, in the one month
+ than the other. You do not use overcoats and you do not use fans. It is as
+ pleasant a climate as could well be contrived, take it all around, and is
+ doubtless the most unvarying in the whole world. The wind blows there a
+ good deal in the summer months, but then you can go over to Oakland, if
+ you choose&mdash;three or four miles away&mdash;it does not blow there. It
+ has only snowed twice in San Francisco in nineteen years, and then it only
+ remained on the ground long enough to astonish the children, and set them
+ to wondering what the feathery stuff was.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link410" id="link410"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="410.jpg (53K)" src="images/410.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ During eight months of the year, straight along, the skies are bright and
+ cloudless, and never a drop of rain falls. But when the other four months
+ come along, you will need to go and steal an umbrella. Because you will
+ require it. Not just one day, but one hundred and twenty days in hardly
+ varying succession. When you want to go visiting, or attend church, or the
+ theatre, you never look up at the clouds to see whether it is likely to
+ rain or not&mdash;you look at the almanac. If it is Winter, it will rain&mdash;and
+ if it is Summer, it won't rain, and you cannot help it. You never need a
+ lightning-rod, because it never thunders and it never lightens. And after
+ you have listened for six or eight weeks, every night, to the dismal
+ monotony of those quiet rains, you will wish in your heart the thunder
+ would leap and crash and roar along those drowsy skies once, and make
+ everything alive&mdash;you will wish the prisoned lightnings would cleave
+ the dull firmament asunder and light it with a blinding glare for one
+ little instant. You would give anything to hear the old familiar thunder
+ again and see the lightning strike somebody. And along in the Summer, when
+ you have suffered about four months of lustrous, pitiless sunshine, you
+ are ready to go down on your knees and plead for rain&mdash;hail&mdash;snow&mdash;thunder
+ and lightning&mdash;anything to break the monotony&mdash;you will take an
+ earthquake, if you cannot do any better. And the chances are that you'll
+ get it, too.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ San Francisco is built on sand hills, but they are prolific sand hills.
+ They yield a generous vegetation. All the rare flowers which people in
+ "the States" rear with such patient care in parlor flower-pots and green-
+ houses, flourish luxuriantly in the open air there all the year round.
+ Calla lilies, all sorts of geraniums, passion flowers, moss roses&mdash;I
+ do not know the names of a tenth part of them. I only know that while New
+ Yorkers are burdened with banks and drifts of snow, Californians are
+ burdened with banks and drifts of flowers, if they only keep their hands
+ off and let them grow. And I have heard that they have also that rarest
+ and most curious of all the flowers, the beautiful Espiritu Santo, as the
+ Spaniards call it&mdash;or flower of the Holy Spirit&mdash;though I
+ thought it grew only in Central America&mdash;down on the Isthmus. In its
+ cup is the daintiest little facsimile of a dove, as pure as snow. The
+ Spaniards have a superstitious reverence for it. The blossom has been
+ conveyed to the States, submerged in ether; and the bulb has been taken
+ thither also, but every attempt to make it bloom after it arrived, has
+ failed.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I have elsewhere spoken of the endless Winter of Mono, California, and but
+ this moment of the eternal Spring of San Francisco. Now if we travel a
+ hundred miles in a straight line, we come to the eternal Summer of
+ Sacramento. One never sees Summer-clothing or mosquitoes in San Francisco&mdash;but
+ they can be found in Sacramento. Not always and unvaryingly, but about one
+ hundred and forty-three months out of twelve years, perhaps. Flowers bloom
+ there, always, the reader can easily believe&mdash;people suffer and
+ sweat, and swear, morning, noon and night, and wear out their stanchest
+ energies fanning themselves. It gets hot there, but if you go down to Fort
+ Yuma you will find it hotter. Fort Yuma is probably the hottest place on
+ earth. The thermometer stays at one hundred and twenty in the shade there
+ all the time&mdash;except when it varies and goes higher. It is a U.S.
+ military post, and its occupants get so used to the terrific heat that
+ they suffer without it. There is a tradition (attributed to John Phenix
+ [It has been purloined by fifty different scribblers who were too poor to
+ invent a fancy but not ashamed to steal one.&mdash;M. T.]) that a very,
+ very wicked soldier died there, once, and of course, went straight to the
+ hottest corner of perdition,&mdash;and the next day he telegraphed back
+ for his blankets. There is no doubt about the truth of this statement&mdash;there
+ can be no doubt about it. I have seen the place where that soldier used to
+ board. In Sacramento it is fiery Summer always, and you can gather roses,
+ and eat strawberries and ice-cream, and wear white linen clothes, and pant
+ and perspire, at eight or nine o'clock in the morning, and then take the
+ cars, and at noon put on your furs and your skates, and go skimming over
+ frozen Donner Lake, seven thousand feet above the valley, among snow banks
+ fifteen feet deep, and in the shadow of grand mountain peaks that lift
+ their frosty crags ten thousand feet above the level of the sea.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link413" id="link413"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="413.jpg (94K)" src="images/413.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There is a transition for you! Where will you find another like it in the
+ Western hemisphere? And some of us have swept around snow-walled curves of
+ the Pacific Railroad in that vicinity, six thousand feet above the sea,
+ and looked down as the birds do, upon the deathless Summer of the
+ Sacramento Valley, with its fruitful fields, its feathery foliage, its
+ silver streams, all slumbering in the mellow haze of its enchanted
+ atmosphere, and all infinitely softened and spiritualized by distance&mdash;a
+ dreamy, exquisite glimpse of fairyland, made all the more charming and
+ striking that it was caught through a forbidden gateway of ice and snow,
+ and savage crags and precipices.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch57" id="linkch57"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LVII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was in this Sacramento Valley, just referred to, that a deal of the
+ most lucrative of the early gold mining was done, and you may still see,
+ in places, its grassy slopes and levels torn and guttered and disfigured
+ by the avaricious spoilers of fifteen and twenty years ago. You may see
+ such disfigurements far and wide over California&mdash;and in some such
+ places, where only meadows and forests are visible&mdash;not a living
+ creature, not a house, no stick or stone or remnant of a ruin, and not a
+ sound, not even a whisper to disturb the Sabbath stillness&mdash;you will
+ find it hard to believe that there stood at one time a
+ fiercely-flourishing little city, of two thousand or three thousand souls,
+ with its newspaper, fire company, brass band, volunteer militia, bank,
+ hotels, noisy Fourth of July processions and speeches, gambling hells
+ crammed with tobacco smoke, profanity, and rough-bearded men of all
+ nations and colors, with tables heaped with gold dust sufficient for the
+ revenues of a German principality&mdash;streets crowded and rife with
+ business&mdash;town lots worth four hundred dollars a front foot&mdash;labor,
+ laughter, music, dancing, swearing, fighting, shooting, stabbing&mdash;a
+ bloody inquest and a man for breakfast every morning&mdash;everything that
+ delights and adorns existence&mdash;all the appointments and appurtenances
+ of a thriving and prosperous and promising young city,&mdash;and now
+ nothing is left of it all but a lifeless, homeless solitude. The men are
+ gone, the houses have vanished, even the name of the place is forgotten.
+ In no other land, in modern times, have towns so absolutely died and
+ disappeared, as in the old mining regions of California.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was a driving, vigorous, restless population in those days. It was a
+ curious population. It was the only population of the kind that the world
+ has ever seen gathered together, and it is not likely that the world will
+ ever see its like again. For observe, it was an assemblage of two hundred
+ thousand young men&mdash;not simpering, dainty, kid-gloved weaklings, but
+ stalwart, muscular, dauntless young braves, brimful of push and energy,
+ and royally endowed with every attribute that goes to make up a peerless
+ and magnificent manhood&mdash;the very pick and choice of the world's
+ glorious ones. No women, no children, no gray and stooping veterans,&mdash;none
+ but erect, bright-eyed, quick-moving, strong-handed young giants&mdash;the
+ strangest population, the finest population, the most gallant host that
+ ever trooped down the startled solitudes of an unpeopled land. And where
+ are they now? Scattered to the ends of the earth&mdash;or prematurely aged
+ and decrepit&mdash;or shot or stabbed in street affrays&mdash;or dead of
+ disappointed hopes and broken hearts&mdash;all gone, or nearly all&mdash;victims
+ devoted upon the altar of the golden calf&mdash;the noblest holocaust that
+ ever wafted its sacrificial incense heavenward. It is pitiful to think
+ upon.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was a splendid population&mdash;for all the slow, sleepy,
+ sluggish-brained sloths staid at home&mdash;you never find that sort of
+ people among pioneers&mdash;you cannot build pioneers out of that sort of
+ material. It was that population that gave to California a name for
+ getting up astounding enterprises and rushing them through with a
+ magnificent dash and daring and a recklessness of cost or consequences,
+ which she bears unto this day&mdash;and when she projects a new surprise,
+ the grave world smiles as usual, and says "Well, that is California all
+ over."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But they were rough in those times! They fairly reveled in gold, whisky,
+ fights, and fandangoes, and were unspeakably happy. The honest miner raked
+ from a hundred to a thousand dollars out of his claim a day, and what with
+ the gambling dens and the other entertainments, he hadn't a cent the next
+ morning, if he had any sort of luck. They cooked their own bacon and
+ beans, sewed on their own buttons, washed their own shirts&mdash;blue
+ woollen ones; and if a man wanted a fight on his hands without any
+ annoying delay, all he had to do was to appear in public in a white shirt
+ or a stove-pipe hat, and he would be accommodated. For those people hated
+ aristocrats. They had a particular and malignant animosity toward what
+ they called a "biled shirt."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was a wild, free, disorderly, grotesque society! Men&mdash;only
+ swarming hosts of stalwart men&mdash;nothing juvenile, nothing feminine,
+ visible anywhere!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In those days miners would flock in crowds to catch a glimpse of that rare
+ and blessed spectacle, a woman! Old inhabitants tell how, in a certain
+ camp, the news went abroad early in the morning that a woman was come!
+ They had seen a calico dress hanging out of a wagon down at the
+ camping-ground&mdash;sign of emigrants from over the great plains.
+ Everybody went down there, and a shout went up when an actual, bona fide
+ dress was discovered fluttering in the wind! The male emigrant was
+ visible. The miners said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Fetch her out!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He said: "It is my wife, gentlemen&mdash;she is sick&mdash;we have been
+ robbed of money, provisions, everything, by the Indians&mdash;we want to
+ rest."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Fetch her out! We've got to see her!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "But, gentlemen, the poor thing, she&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "FETCH HER OUT!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link416" id="link416"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="416.jpg (87K)" src="images/416.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He "fetched her out," and they swung their hats and sent up three rousing
+ cheers and a tiger; and they crowded around and gazed at her, and touched
+ her dress, and listened to her voice with the look of men who listened to
+ a memory rather than a present reality&mdash;and then they collected
+ twenty- five hundred dollars in gold and gave it to the man, and swung
+ their hats again and gave three more cheers, and went home satisfied.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Once I dined in San Francisco with the family of a pioneer, and talked
+ with his daughter, a young lady whose first experience in San Francisco
+ was an adventure, though she herself did not remember it, as she was only
+ two or three years old at the time. Her father said that, after landing
+ from the ship, they were walking up the street, a servant leading the
+ party with the little girl in her arms. And presently a huge miner,
+ bearded, belted, spurred, and bristling with deadly weapons&mdash;just
+ down from a long campaign in the mountains, evidently-barred the way,
+ stopped the servant, and stood gazing, with a face all alive with
+ gratification and astonishment. Then he said, reverently:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link417" id="link417"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="417.jpg (58K)" src="images/417.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, if it ain't a child!" And then he snatched a little leather sack
+ out of his pocket and said to the servant:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "There's a hundred and fifty dollars in dust, there, and I'll give it to
+ you to let me kiss the child!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ That anecdote is true.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But see how things change. Sitting at that dinner-table, listening to that
+ anecdote, if I had offered double the money for the privilege of kissing
+ the same child, I would have been refused. Seventeen added years have far
+ more than doubled the price.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And while upon this subject I will remark that once in Star City, in the
+ Humboldt Mountains, I took my place in a sort of long, post-office single
+ file of miners, to patiently await my chance to peep through a crack in
+ the cabin and get a sight of the splendid new sensation&mdash;a genuine,
+ live Woman! And at the end of half of an hour my turn came, and I put my
+ eye to the crack, and there she was, with one arm akimbo, and tossing
+ flap- jacks in a frying-pan with the other.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And she was one hundred and sixty-five [Being in calmer mood, now, I
+ voluntarily knock off a hundred from that.&mdash;M.T.] years old, and
+ hadn't a tooth in her head.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link418" id="link418"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="418.jpg (28K)" src="images/418.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch58" id="linkch58"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LVIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ For a few months I enjoyed what to me was an entirely new phase of
+ existence&mdash;a butterfly idleness; nothing to do, nobody to be
+ responsible to, and untroubled with financial uneasiness. I fell in love
+ with the most cordial and sociable city in the Union. After the sage-brush
+ and alkali deserts of Washoe, San Francisco was Paradise to me. I lived at
+ the best hotel, exhibited my clothes in the most conspicuous places,
+ infested the opera, and learned to seem enraptured with music which
+ oftener afflicted my ignorant ear than enchanted it, if I had had the
+ vulgar honesty to confess it. However, I suppose I was not greatly worse
+ than the most of my countrymen in that. I had longed to be a butterfly,
+ and I was one at last. I attended private parties in sumptuous evening
+ dress, simpered and aired my graces like a born beau, and polkad and
+ schottisched with a step peculiar to myself&mdash;and the kangaroo. In a
+ word, I kept the due state of a man worth a hundred thousand dollars
+ (prospectively,) and likely to reach absolute affluence when that silver-
+ mine sale should be ultimately achieved in the East. I spent money with a
+ free hand, and meantime watched the stock sales with an interested eye and
+ looked to see what might happen in Nevada.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link420" id="link420"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="420.jpg (49K)" src="images/420.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Something very important happened. The property holders of Nevada voted
+ against the State Constitution; but the folks who had nothing to lose were
+ in the majority, and carried the measure over their heads. But after all
+ it did not immediately look like a disaster, though unquestionably it was
+ one I hesitated, calculated the chances, and then concluded not to sell.
+ Stocks went on rising; speculation went mad; bankers, merchants, lawyers,
+ doctors, mechanics, laborers, even the very washerwomen and servant girls,
+ were putting up their earnings on silver stocks, and every sun that rose
+ in the morning went down on paupers enriched and rich men beggared. What a
+ gambling carnival it was! Gould and Curry soared to six thousand three
+ hundred dollars a foot! And then&mdash;all of a sudden, out went the
+ bottom and everything and everybody went to ruin and destruction! The
+ wreck was complete.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The bubble scarcely left a microscopic moisture behind it. I was an early
+ beggar and a thorough one. My hoarded stocks were not worth the paper they
+ were printed on. I threw them all away. I, the cheerful idiot that had
+ been squandering money like water, and thought myself beyond the reach of
+ misfortune, had not now as much as fifty dollars when I gathered together
+ my various debts and paid them. I removed from the hotel to a very private
+ boarding house. I took a reporter's berth and went to work. I was not
+ entirely broken in spirit, for I was building confidently on the sale of
+ the silver mine in the east. But I could not hear from Dan. My letters
+ miscarried or were not answered.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One day I did not feel vigorous and remained away from the office. The
+ next day I went down toward noon as usual, and found a note on my desk
+ which had been there twenty-four hours. It was signed "Marshall"&mdash;the
+ Virginia reporter&mdash;and contained a request that I should call at the
+ hotel and see him and a friend or two that night, as they would sail for
+ the east in the morning. A postscript added that their errand was a big
+ mining speculation! I was hardly ever so sick in my life. I abused myself
+ for leaving Virginia and entrusting to another man a matter I ought to
+ have attended to myself; I abused myself for remaining away from the
+ office on the one day of all the year that I should have been there. And
+ thus berating myself I trotted a mile to the steamer wharf and arrived
+ just in time to be too late. The ship was in the stream and under way.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link421" id="link421"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="421.jpg (20K)" src="images/421.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I comforted myself with the thought that may be the speculation would
+ amount to nothing&mdash;poor comfort at best&mdash;and then went back to
+ my slavery, resolved to put up with my thirty-five dollars a week and
+ forget all about it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A month afterward I enjoyed my first earthquake. It was one which was long
+ called the "great" earthquake, and is doubtless so distinguished till this
+ day. It was just after noon, on a bright October day. I was coming down
+ Third street. The only objects in motion anywhere in sight in that thickly
+ built and populous quarter, were a man in a buggy behind me, and a street
+ car wending slowly up the cross street. Otherwise, all was solitude and a
+ Sabbath stillness. As I turned the corner, around a frame house, there was
+ a great rattle and jar, and it occurred to me that here was an item!&mdash;no
+ doubt a fight in that house. Before I could turn and seek the door, there
+ came a really terrific shock; the ground seemed to roll under me in waves,
+ interrupted by a violent joggling up and down, and there was a heavy
+ grinding noise as of brick houses rubbing together. I fell up against the
+ frame house and hurt my elbow. I knew what it was, now, and from mere
+ reportorial instinct, nothing else, took out my watch and noted the time
+ of day; at that moment a third and still severer shock came, and as I
+ reeled about on the pavement trying to keep my footing, I saw a sight! The
+ entire front of a tall four-story brick building in Third street sprung
+ outward like a door and fell sprawling across the street, raising a dust
+ like a great volume of smoke! And here came the buggy&mdash;overboard went
+ the man, and in less time than I can tell it the vehicle was distributed
+ in small fragments along three hundred yards of street.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link422" id="link422"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="422.jpg (87K)" src="images/422.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One could have fancied that somebody had fired a charge of chair-rounds
+ and rags down the thoroughfare. The street car had stopped, the horses
+ were rearing and plunging, the passengers were pouring out at both ends,
+ and one fat man had crashed half way through a glass window on one side of
+ the car, got wedged fast and was squirming and screaming like an impaled
+ madman. Every door, of every house, as far as the eye could reach, was
+ vomiting a stream of human beings; and almost before one could execute a
+ wink and begin another, there was a massed multitude of people stretching
+ in endless procession down every street my position commanded. Never was
+ solemn solitude turned into teeming life quicker.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link423a" id="link423a"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="423a.jpg (38K)" src="images/423a.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Of the wonders wrought by "the great earthquake," these were all that came
+ under my eye; but the tricks it did, elsewhere, and far and wide over the
+ town, made toothsome gossip for nine days.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The destruction of property was trifling&mdash;the injury to it was wide-
+ spread and somewhat serious.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link423b" id="link423b"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="423b.jpg (37K)" src="images/423b.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The "curiosities" of the earthquake were simply endless. Gentlemen and
+ ladies who were sick, or were taking a siesta, or had dissipated till a
+ late hour and were making up lost sleep, thronged into the public streets
+ in all sorts of queer apparel, and some without any at all. One woman who
+ had been washing a naked child, ran down the street holding it by the
+ ankles as if it were a dressed turkey. Prominent citizens who were
+ supposed to keep the Sabbath strictly, rushed out of saloons in their
+ shirt-sleeves, with billiard cues in their hands. Dozens of men with necks
+ swathed in napkins, rushed from barber-shops, lathered to the eyes or with
+ one cheek clean shaved and the other still bearing a hairy stubble. Horses
+ broke from stables, and a frightened dog rushed up a short attic ladder
+ and out on to a roof, and when his scare was over had not the nerve to go
+ down again the same way he had gone up.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A prominent editor flew down stairs, in the principal hotel, with nothing
+ on but one brief undergarment&mdash;met a chambermaid, and exclaimed:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh, what shall I do! Where shall I go!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ She responded with naive serenity:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "If you have no choice, you might try a clothing-store!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link424" id="link424"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="424.jpg (63K)" src="images/424.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A certain foreign consul's lady was the acknowledged leader of fashion,
+ and every time she appeared in anything new or extraordinary, the ladies
+ in the vicinity made a raid on their husbands' purses and arrayed
+ themselves similarly. One man who had suffered considerably and growled
+ accordingly, was standing at the window when the shocks came, and the next
+ instant the consul's wife, just out of the bath, fled by with no other
+ apology for clothing than&mdash;a bath-towel! The sufferer rose superior
+ to the terrors of the earthquake, and said to his wife:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Now that is something like! Get out your towel my dear!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link425" id="link425"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="425 (40K)" src="images/425.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The plastering that fell from ceilings in San Francisco that day, would
+ have covered several acres of ground. For some days afterward, groups of
+ eyeing and pointing men stood about many a building, looking at long zig-
+ zag cracks that extended from the eaves to the ground. Four feet of the
+ tops of three chimneys on one house were broken square off and turned
+ around in such a way as to completely stop the draft.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A crack a hundred feet long gaped open six inches wide in the middle of
+ one street and then shut together again with such force, as to ridge up
+ the meeting earth like a slender grave. A lady sitting in her rocking and
+ quaking parlor, saw the wall part at the ceiling, open and shut twice,
+ like a mouth, and then-drop the end of a brick on the floor like a tooth.
+ She was a woman easily disgusted with foolishness, and she arose and went
+ out of there. One lady who was coming down stairs was astonished to see a
+ bronze Hercules lean forward on its pedestal as if to strike her with its
+ club. They both reached the bottom of the flight at the same time,&mdash;the
+ woman insensible from the fright. Her child, born some little time
+ afterward, was club-footed. However&mdash;on second thought,&mdash;if the
+ reader sees any coincidence in this, he must do it at his own risk.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The first shock brought down two or three huge organ-pipes in one of the
+ churches. The minister, with uplifted hands, was just closing the
+ services. He glanced up, hesitated, and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "However, we will omit the benediction!"&mdash;and the next instant there
+ was a vacancy in the atmosphere where he had stood.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After the first shock, an Oakland minister said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Keep your seats! There is no better place to die than this"&mdash;
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And added, after the third:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "But outside is good enough!" He then skipped out at the back door.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link426" id="link426"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="426.jpg (40K)" src="images/426.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Such another destruction of mantel ornaments and toilet bottles as the
+ earthquake created, San Francisco never saw before. There was hardly a
+ girl or a matron in the city but suffered losses of this kind. Suspended
+ pictures were thrown down, but oftener still, by a curious freak of the
+ earthquake's humor, they were whirled completely around with their faces
+ to the wall! There was great difference of opinion, at first, as to the
+ course or direction the earthquake traveled, but water that splashed out
+ of various tanks and buckets settled that. Thousands of people were made
+ so sea-sick by the rolling and pitching of floors and streets that they
+ were weak and bed-ridden for hours, and some few for even days afterward.&mdash;Hardly
+ an individual escaped nausea entirely.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The queer earthquake&mdash;episodes that formed the staple of San
+ Francisco gossip for the next week would fill a much larger book than
+ this, and so I will diverge from the subject.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By and by, in the due course of things, I picked up a copy of the
+ Enterprise one day, and fell under this cruel blow:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ NEVADA MINES IN NEW YORK.&mdash;G. M. Marshall, Sheba Hurs and Amos H.
+ Rose, who left San Francisco last July for New York City, with ores from
+ mines in Pine Wood District, Humboldt County, and on the Reese River
+ range, have disposed of a mine containing six thousand feet and called
+ the Pine Mountains Consolidated, for the sum of $3,000,000. The stamps
+ on the deed, which is now on its way to Humboldt County, from New York,
+ for record, amounted to $3,000, which is said to be the largest amount
+ of stamps ever placed on one document. A working capital of $1,000,000
+ has been paid into the treasury, and machinery has already been
+ purchased for a large quartz mill, which will be put up as soon as
+ possible. The stock in this company is all full paid and entirely
+ unassessable. The ores of the mines in this district somewhat resemble
+ those of the Sheba mine in Humboldt. Sheba Hurst, the discoverer of the
+ mines, with his friends corralled all the best leads and all the land
+ and timber they desired before making public their whereabouts. Ores
+ from there, assayed in this city, showed them to be exceedingly rich in
+ silver and gold&mdash;silver predominating. There is an abundance of
+ wood and water in the District. We are glad to know that New York
+ capital has been enlisted in the development of the mines of this
+ region. Having seen the ores and assays, we are satisfied that the mines
+ of the District are very valuable&mdash;anything but wild-cat.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ Once more native imbecility had carried the day, and I had lost a million!
+ It was the "blind lead" over again.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Let us not dwell on this miserable matter. If I were inventing these
+ things, I could be wonderfully humorous over them; but they are too true
+ to be talked of with hearty levity, even at this distant day. [True, and
+ yet not exactly as given in the above figures, possibly. I saw Marshall,
+ months afterward, and although he had plenty of money he did not claim to
+ have captured an entire million. In fact I gathered that he had not then
+ received $50,000. Beyond that figure his fortune appeared to consist of
+ uncertain vast expectations rather than prodigious certainties. However,
+ when the above item appeared in print I put full faith in it, and
+ incontinently wilted and went to seed under it.] Suffice it that I so lost
+ heart, and so yielded myself up to repinings and sighings and foolish
+ regrets, that I neglected my duties and became about worthless, as a
+ reporter for a brisk newspaper. And at last one of the proprietors took me
+ aside, with a charity I still remember with considerable respect, and gave
+ me an opportunity to resign my berth and so save myself the disgrace of a
+ dismissal.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch59" id="linkch59"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LIX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ For a time I wrote literary screeds for the Golden Era. C. H. Webb had
+ established a very excellent literary weekly called the Californian, but
+ high merit was no guaranty of success; it languished, and he sold out to
+ three printers, and Bret Harte became editor at $20 a week, and I was
+ employed to contribute an article a week at $12. But the journal still
+ languished, and the printers sold out to Captain Ogden, a rich man and a
+ pleasant gentleman who chose to amuse himself with such an expensive
+ luxury without much caring about the cost of it. When he grew tired of the
+ novelty, he re-sold to the printers, the paper presently died a peaceful
+ death, and I was out of work again. I would not mention these things but
+ for the fact that they so aptly illustrate the ups and downs that
+ characterize life on the Pacific coast. A man could hardly stumble into
+ such a variety of queer vicissitudes in any other country.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ For two months my sole occupation was avoiding acquaintances; for during
+ that time I did not earn a penny, or buy an article of any kind, or pay my
+ board. I became a very adept at "slinking." I slunk from back street to
+ back street, I slunk away from approaching faces that looked familiar, I
+ slunk to my meals, ate them humbly and with a mute apology for every
+ mouthful I robbed my generous landlady of, and at midnight, after
+ wanderings that were but slinkings away from cheerfulness and light, I
+ slunk to my bed. I felt meaner, and lowlier and more despicable than the
+ worms. During all this time I had but one piece of money&mdash;a silver
+ ten cent piece&mdash;and I held to it and would not spend it on any
+ account, lest the consciousness coming strong upon me that I was entirely
+ penniless, might suggest suicide. I had pawned every thing but the clothes
+ I had on; so I clung to my dime desperately, till it was smooth with
+ handling.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link429" id="link429"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="429.jpg (36K)" src="images/429.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ However, I am forgetting. I did have one other occupation beside that of
+ "slinking." It was the entertaining of a collector (and being entertained
+ by him,) who had in his hands the Virginia banker's bill for forty-six
+ dollars which I had loaned my schoolmate, the "Prodigal." This man used to
+ call regularly once a week and dun me, and sometimes oftener. He did it
+ from sheer force of habit, for he knew he could get nothing. He would get
+ out his bill, calculate the interest for me, at five per cent a month, and
+ show me clearly that there was no attempt at fraud in it and no mistakes;
+ and then plead, and argue and dun with all his might for any sum&mdash;any
+ little trifle&mdash;even a dollar&mdash;even half a dollar, on account.
+ Then his duty was accomplished and his conscience free. He immediately
+ dropped the subject there always; got out a couple of cigars and divided,
+ put his feet in the window, and then we would have a long, luxurious talk
+ about everything and everybody, and he would furnish me a world of curious
+ dunning adventures out of the ample store in his memory. By and by he
+ would clap his hat on his head, shake hands and say briskly:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, business is business&mdash;can't stay with you always!"&mdash;and
+ was off in a second.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The idea of pining for a dun! And yet I used to long for him to come, and
+ would get as uneasy as any mother if the day went by without his visit,
+ when I was expecting him. But he never collected that bill, at last nor
+ any part of it. I lived to pay it to the banker myself.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Misery loves company. Now and then at night, in out-of-the way, dimly
+ lighted places, I found myself happening on another child of misfortune.
+ He looked so seedy and forlorn, so homeless and friendless and forsaken,
+ that I yearned toward him as a brother. I wanted to claim kinship with him
+ and go about and enjoy our wretchedness together. The drawing toward each
+ other must have been mutual; at any rate we got to falling together
+ oftener, though still seemingly by accident; and although we did not speak
+ or evince any recognition, I think the dull anxiety passed out of both of
+ us when we saw each other, and then for several hours we would idle along
+ contentedly, wide apart, and glancing furtively in at home lights and
+ fireside gatherings, out of the night shadows, and very much enjoying our
+ dumb companionship.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Finally we spoke, and were inseparable after that. For our woes were
+ identical, almost. He had been a reporter too, and lost his berth, and
+ this was his experience, as nearly as I can recollect it. After losing his
+ berth he had gone down, down, down, with never a halt: from a boarding
+ house on Russian Hill to a boarding house in Kearney street; from thence
+ to Dupont; from thence to a low sailor den; and from thence to lodgings in
+ goods boxes and empty hogsheads near the wharves. Then; for a while, he
+ had gained a meagre living by sewing up bursted sacks of grain on the
+ piers; when that failed he had found food here and there as chance threw
+ it in his way. He had ceased to show his face in daylight, now, for a
+ reporter knows everybody, rich and poor, high and low, and cannot well
+ avoid familiar faces in the broad light of day.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This mendicant Blucher&mdash;I call him that for convenience&mdash;was a
+ splendid creature. He was full of hope, pluck and philosophy; he was well
+ read and a man of cultivated taste; he had a bright wit and was a master
+ of satire; his kindliness and his generous spirit made him royal in my
+ eyes and changed his curb-stone seat to a throne and his damaged hat to a
+ crown.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He had an adventure, once, which sticks fast in my memory as the most
+ pleasantly grotesque that ever touched my sympathies. He had been without
+ a penny for two months. He had shirked about obscure streets, among
+ friendly dim lights, till the thing had become second nature to him. But
+ at last he was driven abroad in daylight. The cause was sufficient; he had
+ not tasted food for forty-eight hours, and he could not endure the misery
+ of his hunger in idle hiding. He came along a back street, glowering at
+ the loaves in bake-shop windows, and feeling that he could trade his life
+ away for a morsel to eat. The sight of the bread doubled his hunger; but
+ it was good to look at it, any how, and imagine what one might do if one
+ only had it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Presently, in the middle of the street he saw a shining spot&mdash;looked
+ again&mdash;did not, and could not, believe his eyes&mdash;turned away, to
+ try them, then looked again. It was a verity&mdash;no vain,
+ hunger-inspired delusion&mdash;it was a silver dime!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link431" id="link431"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="431.jpg (31K)" src="images/431.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He snatched it&mdash;gloated over it; doubted it&mdash;bit it&mdash;found
+ it genuine&mdash;choked his heart down, and smothered a halleluiah. Then
+ he looked around&mdash;saw that nobody was looking at him&mdash;threw the
+ dime down where it was before&mdash;walked away a few steps, and
+ approached again, pretending he did not know it was there, so that he
+ could re-enjoy the luxury of finding it. He walked around it, viewing it
+ from different points; then sauntered about with his hands in his pockets,
+ looking up at the signs and now and then glancing at it and feeling the
+ old thrill again. Finally he took it up, and went away, fondling it in his
+ pocket. He idled through unfrequented streets, stopping in doorways and
+ corners to take it out and look at it. By and by he went home to his
+ lodgings&mdash;an empty queens-ware hogshead,&mdash;and employed himself
+ till night trying to make up his mind what to buy with it. But it was hard
+ to do. To get the most for it was the idea. He knew that at the Miner's
+ Restaurant he could get a plate of beans and a piece of bread for ten
+ cents; or a fish- ball and some few trifles, but they gave "no bread with
+ one fish-ball" there. At French Pete's he could get a veal cutlet, plain,
+ and some radishes and bread, for ten cents; or a cup of coffee&mdash;a
+ pint at least&mdash;and a slice of bread; but the slice was not thick
+ enough by the eighth of an inch, and sometimes they were still more
+ criminal than that in the cutting of it. At seven o'clock his hunger was
+ wolfish; and still his mind was not made up. He turned out and went up
+ Merchant street, still ciphering; and chewing a bit of stick, as is the
+ way of starving men.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link432" id="link432"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="432.jpg (38K)" src="images/432.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He passed before the lights of Martin's restaurant, the most aristocratic
+ in the city, and stopped. It was a place where he had often dined, in
+ better days, and Martin knew him well. Standing aside, just out of the
+ range of the light, he worshiped the quails and steaks in the show window,
+ and imagined that may be the fairy times were not gone yet and some prince
+ in disguise would come along presently and tell him to go in there and
+ take whatever he wanted. He chewed his stick with a hungry interest as he
+ warmed to his subject. Just at this juncture he was conscious of some one
+ at his side, sure enough; and then a finger touched his arm. He looked up,
+ over his shoulder, and saw an apparition&mdash;a very allegory of Hunger!
+ It was a man six feet high, gaunt, unshaven, hung with rags; with a
+ haggard face and sunken cheeks, and eyes that pleaded piteously. This
+ phantom said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Come with me&mdash;please."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He locked his arm in Blucher's and walked up the street to where the
+ passengers were few and the light not strong, and then facing about, put
+ out his hands in a beseeching way, and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Friend&mdash;stranger&mdash;look at me! Life is easy to you&mdash;you go
+ about, placid and content, as I did once, in my day&mdash;you have been in
+ there, and eaten your sumptuous supper, and picked your teeth, and hummed
+ your tune, and thought your pleasant thoughts, and said to yourself it is
+ a good world&mdash;but you've never suffered! You don't know what trouble
+ is&mdash;you don't know what misery is&mdash;nor hunger! Look at me!
+ Stranger have pity on a poor friendless, homeless dog! As God is my judge,
+ I have not tasted food for eight and forty hours!&mdash;look in my eyes
+ and see if I lie! Give me the least trifle in the world to keep me from
+ starving&mdash;anything&mdash;twenty-five cents! Do it, stranger&mdash;do
+ it, please. It will be nothing to you, but life to me. Do it, and I will
+ go down on my knees and lick the dust before you! I will kiss your
+ footprints&mdash;I will worship the very ground you walk on! Only
+ twenty-five cents! I am famishing&mdash;perishing&mdash;starving by
+ inches! For God's sake don't desert me!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link433" id="link433"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="433.jpg (71K)" src="images/433.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Blucher was bewildered&mdash;and touched, too&mdash;stirred to the depths.
+ He reflected. Thought again. Then an idea struck him, and he said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Come with me."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He took the outcast's arm, walked him down to Martin's restaurant, seated
+ him at a marble table, placed the bill of fare before him, and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Order what you want, friend. Charge it to me, Mr. Martin."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "All right, Mr. Blucher," said Martin.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then Blucher stepped back and leaned against the counter and watched the
+ man stow away cargo after cargo of buckwheat cakes at seventy-five cents a
+ plate; cup after cup of coffee, and porter house steaks worth two dollars
+ apiece; and when six dollars and a half's worth of destruction had been
+ accomplished, and the stranger's hunger appeased, Blucher went down to
+ French Pete's, bought a veal cutlet plain, a slice of bread, and three
+ radishes, with his dime, and set to and feasted like a king!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Take the episode all around, it was as odd as any that can be culled from
+ the myriad curiosities of Californian life, perhaps.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch60" id="linkch60"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By and by, an old friend of mine, a miner, came down from one of the
+ decayed mining camps of Tuolumne, California, and I went back with him. We
+ lived in a small cabin on a verdant hillside, and there were not five
+ other cabins in view over the wide expanse of hill and forest. Yet a
+ flourishing city of two or three thousand population had occupied this
+ grassy dead solitude during the flush times of twelve or fifteen years
+ before, and where our cabin stood had once been the heart of the teeming
+ hive, the centre of the city. When the mines gave out the town fell into
+ decay, and in a few years wholly disappeared&mdash;streets, dwellings,
+ shops, everything&mdash;and left no sign. The grassy slopes were as green
+ and smooth and desolate of life as if they had never been disturbed. The
+ mere handful of miners still remaining, had seen the town spring up
+ spread, grow and flourish in its pride; and they had seen it sicken and
+ die, and pass away like a dream. With it their hopes had died, and their
+ zest of life. They had long ago resigned themselves to their exile, and
+ ceased to correspond with their distant friends or turn longing eyes
+ toward their early homes. They had accepted banishment, forgotten the
+ world and been forgotten of the world. They were far from telegraphs and
+ railroads, and they stood, as it were, in a living grave, dead to the
+ events that stirred the globe's great populations, dead to the common
+ interests of men, isolated and outcast from brotherhood with their kind.
+ It was the most singular, and almost the most touching and melancholy
+ exile that fancy can imagine.&mdash;One of my associates in this locality,
+ for two or three months, was a man who had had a university education; but
+ now for eighteen years he had decayed there by inches, a bearded, rough-
+ clad, clay-stained miner, and at times, among his sighings and
+ soliloquizings, he unconsciously interjected vaguely remembered Latin and
+ Greek sentences&mdash;dead and musty tongues, meet vehicles for the
+ thoughts of one whose dreams were all of the past, whose life was a
+ failure; a tired man, burdened with the present, and indifferent to the
+ future; a man without ties, hopes, interests, waiting for rest and the
+ end.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link436" id="link436"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="436.jpg (34K)" src="images/436.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In that one little corner of California is found a species of mining which
+ is seldom or never mentioned in print. It is called "pocket mining" and I
+ am not aware that any of it is done outside of that little corner. The
+ gold is not evenly distributed through the surface dirt, as in ordinary
+ placer mines, but is collected in little spots, and they are very wide
+ apart and exceedingly hard to find, but when you do find one you reap a
+ rich and sudden harvest. There are not now more than twenty pocket miners
+ in that entire little region. I think I know every one of them personally.
+ I have known one of them to hunt patiently about the hill-sides every day
+ for eight months without finding gold enough to make a snuff-box&mdash;his
+ grocery bill running up relentlessly all the time&mdash;and then find a
+ pocket and take out of it two thousand dollars in two dips of his shovel.
+ I have known him to take out three thousand dollars in two hours, and go
+ and pay up every cent of his indebtedness, then enter on a dazzling spree
+ that finished the last of his treasure before the night was gone. And the
+ next day he bought his groceries on credit as usual, and shouldered his
+ pan and shovel and went off to the hills hunting pockets again happy and
+ content. This is the most fascinating of all the different kinds of
+ mining, and furnishes a very handsome percentage of victims to the lunatic
+ asylum.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Pocket hunting is an ingenious process. You take a spadeful of earth from
+ the hill-side and put it in a large tin pan and dissolve and wash it
+ gradually away till nothing is left but a teaspoonful of fine sediment.
+ Whatever gold was in that earth has remained, because, being the heaviest,
+ it has sought the bottom. Among the sediment you will find half a dozen
+ yellow particles no larger than pin-heads. You are delighted. You move off
+ to one side and wash another pan. If you find gold again, you move to one
+ side further, and wash a third pan. If you find no gold this time, you are
+ delighted again, because you know you are on the right scent.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ You lay an imaginary plan, shaped like a fan, with its handle up the hill&mdash;for
+ just where the end of the handle is, you argue that the rich deposit lies
+ hidden, whose vagrant grains of gold have escaped and been washed down the
+ hill, spreading farther and farther apart as they wandered. And so you
+ proceed up the hill, washing the earth and narrowing your lines every time
+ the absence of gold in the pan shows that you are outside the spread of
+ the fan; and at last, twenty yards up the hill your lines have converged
+ to a point&mdash;a single foot from that point you cannot find any gold.
+ Your breath comes short and quick, you are feverish with excitement; the
+ dinner-bell may ring its clapper off, you pay no attention; friends may
+ die, weddings transpire, houses burn down, they are nothing to you; you
+ sweat and dig and delve with a frantic interest&mdash;and all at once you
+ strike it! Up comes a spadeful of earth and quartz that is all lovely with
+ soiled lumps and leaves and sprays of gold. Sometimes that one spadeful is
+ all&mdash;$500. Sometimes the nest contains $10,000, and it takes you
+ three or four days to get it all out. The pocket-miners tell of one nest
+ that yielded $60,000 and two men exhausted it in two weeks, and then sold
+ the ground for $10,000 to a party who never got $300 out of it afterward.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link437" id="link437"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="437.jpg (37K)" src="images/437.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The hogs are good pocket hunters. All the summer they root around the
+ bushes, and turn up a thousand little piles of dirt, and then the miners
+ long for the rains; for the rains beat upon these little piles and wash
+ them down and expose the gold, possibly right over a pocket. Two pockets
+ were found in this way by the same man in one day. One had $5,000 in it
+ and the other $8,000. That man could appreciate it, for he hadn't had a
+ cent for about a year.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In Tuolumne lived two miners who used to go to the neighboring village in
+ the afternoon and return every night with household supplies. Part of the
+ distance they traversed a trail, and nearly always sat down to rest on a
+ great boulder that lay beside the path. In the course of thirteen years
+ they had worn that boulder tolerably smooth, sitting on it. By and by two
+ vagrant Mexicans came along and occupied the seat. They began to amuse
+ themselves by chipping off flakes from the boulder with a sledge- hammer.
+ They examined one of these flakes and found it rich with gold. That
+ boulder paid them $800 afterward. But the aggravating circumstance was
+ that these "Greasers" knew that there must be more gold where that boulder
+ came from, and so they went panning up the hill and found what was
+ probably the richest pocket that region has yet produced. It took three
+ months to exhaust it, and it yielded $120,000. The two American miners who
+ used to sit on the boulder are poor yet, and they take turn about in
+ getting up early in the morning to curse those Mexicans&mdash;and when it
+ comes down to pure ornamental cursing, the native American is gifted above
+ the sons of men.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I have dwelt at some length upon this matter of pocket mining because it
+ is a subject that is seldom referred to in print, and therefore I judged
+ that it would have for the reader that interest which naturally attaches
+ to novelty.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /> <br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch61"
+ id="linkch61"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One of my comrades there&mdash;another of those victims of eighteen years
+ of unrequited toil and blighted hopes&mdash;was one of the gentlest
+ spirits that ever bore its patient cross in a weary exile: grave and
+ simple Dick Baker, pocket-miner of Dead-House Gulch.&mdash;He was
+ forty-six, gray as a rat, earnest, thoughtful, slenderly educated,
+ slouchily dressed and clay- soiled, but his heart was finer metal than any
+ gold his shovel ever brought to light&mdash;than any, indeed, that ever
+ was mined or minted.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Whenever he was out of luck and a little down-hearted, he would fall to
+ mourning over the loss of a wonderful cat he used to own (for where women
+ and children are not, men of kindly impulses take up with pets, for they
+ must love something). And he always spoke of the strange sagacity of that
+ cat with the air of a man who believed in his secret heart that there was
+ something human about it&mdash;may be even supernatural.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I heard him talking about this animal once. He said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link440" id="link440"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="440.jpg (18K)" src="images/440.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gentlemen, I used to have a cat here, by the name of Tom Quartz, which
+ you'd a took an interest in I reckon&mdash;most any body would. I had him
+ here eight year&mdash;and he was the remarkablest cat I ever see. He was a
+ large gray one of the Tom specie, an' he had more hard, natchral sense
+ than any man in this camp&mdash;'n' a power of dignity&mdash;he wouldn't
+ let the Gov'ner of Californy be familiar with him. He never ketched a rat
+ in his life&mdash;'peared to be above it. He never cared for nothing but
+ mining. He knowed more about mining, that cat did, than any man I ever,
+ ever see. You couldn't tell him noth'n 'bout placer diggin's&mdash;'n' as
+ for pocket mining, why he was just born for it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "He would dig out after me an' Jim when we went over the hills
+ prospect'n', and he would trot along behind us for as much as five mile,
+ if we went so fur. An' he had the best judgment about mining ground&mdash;why
+ you never see anything like it. When we went to work, he'd scatter a
+ glance around, 'n' if he didn't think much of the indications, he would
+ give a look as much as to say, 'Well, I'll have to get you to excuse me,'
+ 'n' without another word he'd hyste his nose into the air 'n' shove for
+ home. But if the ground suited him, he would lay low 'n' keep dark till
+ the first pan was washed, 'n' then he would sidle up 'n' take a look, an'
+ if there was about six or seven grains of gold he was satisfied&mdash;he
+ didn't want no better prospect 'n' that&mdash;'n' then he would lay down
+ on our coats and snore like a steamboat till we'd struck the pocket, an'
+ then get up 'n' superintend. He was nearly lightnin' on superintending.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, bye an' bye, up comes this yer quartz excitement. Every body was
+ into it&mdash;every body was pick'n' 'n' blast'n' instead of shovelin'
+ dirt on the hill side&mdash;every body was put'n' down a shaft instead of
+ scrapin' the surface. Noth'n' would do Jim, but we must tackle the ledges,
+ too, 'n' so we did. We commenced put'n' down a shaft, 'n' Tom Quartz he
+ begin to wonder what in the Dickens it was all about. He hadn't ever seen
+ any mining like that before, 'n' he was all upset, as you may say&mdash;he
+ couldn't come to a right understanding of it no way&mdash;it was too many
+ for him. He was down on it, too, you bet you&mdash;he was down on it
+ powerful&mdash;'n' always appeared to consider it the cussedest
+ foolishness out. But that cat, you know, was always agin new fangled
+ arrangements&mdash;somehow he never could abide'em. You know how it is
+ with old habits. But by an' by Tom Quartz begin to git sort of reconciled
+ a little, though he never could altogether understand that eternal sinkin'
+ of a shaft an' never pannin' out any thing. At last he got to comin' down
+ in the shaft, hisself, to try to cipher it out. An' when he'd git the
+ blues, 'n' feel kind o'scruffy, 'n' aggravated 'n' disgusted&mdash;knowin'
+ as he did, that the bills was runnin' up all the time an' we warn't makin'
+ a cent&mdash;he would curl up on a gunny sack in the corner an' go to
+ sleep. Well, one day when the shaft was down about eight foot, the rock
+ got so hard that we had to put in a blast&mdash;the first blast'n' we'd
+ ever done since Tom Quartz was born. An' then we lit the fuse 'n' clumb
+ out 'n' got off 'bout fifty yards&mdash;'n' forgot 'n' left Tom Quartz
+ sound asleep on the gunny sack.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link441" id="link441"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="441.jpg (89K)" src="images/441.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "In 'bout a minute we seen a puff of smoke bust up out of the hole, 'n'
+ then everything let go with an awful crash, 'n' about four million ton of
+ rocks 'n' dirt 'n' smoke 'n; splinters shot up 'bout a mile an' a half
+ into the air, an' by George, right in the dead centre of it was old Tom
+ Quartz a goin' end over end, an' a snortin' an' a sneez'n', an' a clawin'
+ an' a reachin' for things like all possessed. But it warn't no use, you
+ know, it warn't no use. An' that was the last we see of him for about two
+ minutes 'n' a half, an' then all of a sudden it begin to rain rocks and
+ rubbage, an' directly he come down ker-whop about ten foot off f'm where
+ we stood Well, I reckon he was p'raps the orneriest lookin' beast you ever
+ see. One ear was sot back on his neck, 'n' his tail was stove up, 'n' his
+ eye-winkers was swinged off, 'n' he was all blacked up with powder an'
+ smoke, an' all sloppy with mud 'n' slush f'm one end to the other.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well sir, it warn't no use to try to apologize&mdash;we couldn't say a
+ word. He took a sort of a disgusted look at hisself, 'n' then he looked at
+ us&mdash;an' it was just exactly the same as if he had said&mdash;'Gents,
+ may be you think it's smart to take advantage of a cat that 'ain't had no
+ experience of quartz minin', but I think different'&mdash;an' then he
+ turned on his heel 'n' marched off home without ever saying another word.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link442" id="link442"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="442.jpg (16K)" src="images/442.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "That was jest his style. An' may be you won't believe it, but after that
+ you never see a cat so prejudiced agin quartz mining as what he was. An'
+ by an' bye when he did get to goin' down in the shaft agin, you'd 'a been
+ astonished at his sagacity. The minute we'd tetch off a blast 'n' the
+ fuse'd begin to sizzle, he'd give a look as much as to say: 'Well, I'll
+ have to git you to excuse me,' an' it was surpris'n' the way he'd shin out
+ of that hole 'n' go f'r a tree. Sagacity? It ain't no name for it. 'Twas
+ inspiration!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I said, "Well, Mr. Baker, his prejudice against quartz-mining was
+ remarkable, considering how he came by it. Couldn't you ever cure him of
+ it?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Cure him! No! When Tom Quartz was sot once, he was always sot&mdash;and
+ you might a blowed him up as much as three million times 'n' you'd never a
+ broken him of his cussed prejudice agin quartz mining."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The affection and the pride that lit up Baker's face when he delivered
+ this tribute to the firmness of his humble friend of other days, will
+ always be a vivid memory with me.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At the end of two months we had never "struck" a pocket. We had panned up
+ and down the hillsides till they looked plowed like a field; we could have
+ put in a crop of grain, then, but there would have been no way to get it
+ to market. We got many good "prospects," but when the gold gave out in the
+ pan and we dug down, hoping and longing, we found only emptiness&mdash;the
+ pocket that should have been there was as barren as our own.&mdash;At last
+ we shouldered our pans and shovels and struck out over the hills to try
+ new localities. We prospected around Angel's Camp, in Calaveras county,
+ during three weeks, but had no success. Then we wandered on foot among the
+ mountains, sleeping under the trees at night, for the weather was mild,
+ but still we remained as centless as the last rose of summer. That is a
+ poor joke, but it is in pathetic harmony with the circumstances, since we
+ were so poor ourselves. In accordance with the custom of the country, our
+ door had always stood open and our board welcome to tramping miners&mdash;they
+ drifted along nearly every day, dumped their paust shovels by the
+ threshold and took "pot luck" with us&mdash;and now on our own tramp we
+ never found cold hospitality.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Our wanderings were wide and in many directions; and now I could give the
+ reader a vivid description of the Big Trees and the marvels of the Yo
+ Semite&mdash;but what has this reader done to me that I should persecute
+ him? I will deliver him into the hands of less conscientious tourists and
+ take his blessing. Let me be charitable, though I fail in all virtues
+ else.
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ Note: Some of the phrases in the above are mining technicalities,
+ purely, and may be a little obscure to the general reader. In "placer
+ diggings" the gold is scattered all through the surface dirt; in
+ "pocket" diggings it is concentrated in one little spot; in "quartz" the
+ gold is in a solid, continuous vein of rock, enclosed between distinct
+ walls of some other kind of stone&mdash;and this is the most laborious
+ and expensive of all the different kinds of mining. "Prospecting" is
+ hunting for a "placer"; "indications" are signs of its presence;
+ "panning out" refers to the washing process by which the grains of gold
+ are separated from the dirt; a "prospect" is what one finds in the first
+ panful of dirt&mdash;and its value determines whether it is a good or a
+ bad prospect, and whether it is worth while to tarry there or seek
+ further.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch62" id="linkch62"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After a three months' absence, I found myself in San Francisco again,
+ without a cent. When my credit was about exhausted, (for I had become too
+ mean and lazy, now, to work on a morning paper, and there were no
+ vacancies on the evening journals,) I was created San Francisco
+ correspondent of the Enterprise, and at the end of five months I was out
+ of debt, but my interest in my work was gone; for my correspondence being
+ a daily one, without rest or respite, I got unspeakably tired of it. I
+ wanted another change. The vagabond instinct was strong upon me. Fortune
+ favored and I got a new berth and a delightful one. It was to go down to
+ the Sandwich Islands and write some letters for the Sacramento Union, an
+ excellent journal and liberal with employees.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We sailed in the propeller Ajax, in the middle of winter. The almanac
+ called it winter, distinctly enough, but the weather was a compromise
+ between spring and summer. Six days out of port, it became summer
+ altogether. We had some thirty passengers; among them a cheerful soul by
+ the name of Williams, and three sea-worn old whaleship captains going down
+ to join their vessels. These latter played euchre in the smoking room day
+ and night, drank astonishing quantities of raw whisky without being in the
+ least affected by it, and were the happiest people I think I ever saw. And
+ then there was "the old Admiral&mdash;" a retired whaleman. He was a
+ roaring, terrific combination of wind and lightning and thunder, and
+ earnest, whole-souled profanity. But nevertheless he was tender- hearted
+ as a girl. He was a raving, deafening, devastating typhoon, laying waste
+ the cowering seas but with an unvexed refuge in the centre where all
+ comers were safe and at rest. Nobody could know the "Admiral" without
+ liking him; and in a sudden and dire emergency I think no friend of his
+ would know which to choose&mdash;to be cursed by him or prayed for by a
+ less efficient person.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link445" id="link445"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="445.jpg (65K)" src="images/445.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ His Title of "Admiral" was more strictly "official" than any ever worn by
+ a naval officer before or since, perhaps&mdash;for it was the voluntary
+ offering of a whole nation, and came direct from the people themselves
+ without any intermediate red tape&mdash;the people of the Sandwich
+ Islands. It was a title that came to him freighted with affection, and
+ honor, and appreciation of his unpretending merit. And in testimony of the
+ genuineness of the title it was publicly ordained that an exclusive flag
+ should be devised for him and used solely to welcome his coming and wave
+ him God-speed in his going. From that time forth, whenever his ship was
+ signaled in the offing, or he catted his anchor and stood out to sea, that
+ ensign streamed from the royal halliards on the parliament house and the
+ nation lifted their hats to it with spontaneous accord.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Yet he had never fired a gun or fought a battle in his life. When I knew
+ him on board the Ajax, he was seventy-two years old and had plowed the
+ salt water sixty-one of them. For sixteen years he had gone in and out of
+ the harbor of Honolulu in command of a whaleship, and for sixteen more had
+ been captain of a San Francisco and Sandwich Island passenger packet and
+ had never had an accident or lost a vessel. The simple natives knew him
+ for a friend who never failed them, and regarded him as children regard a
+ father. It was a dangerous thing to oppress them when the roaring Admiral
+ was around.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Two years before I knew the Admiral, he had retired from the sea on a
+ competence, and had sworn a colossal nine-jointed oath that he would
+ "never go within smelling distance of the salt water again as long as he
+ lived." And he had conscientiously kept it. That is to say, he considered
+ he had kept it, and it would have been more than dangerous to suggest to
+ him, even in the gentlest way, that making eleven long sea voyages, as a
+ passenger, during the two years that had transpired since he "retired,"
+ was only keeping the general spirit of it and not the strict letter.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Admiral knew only one narrow line of conduct to pursue in any and all
+ cases where there was a fight, and that was to shoulder his way straight
+ in without an inquiry as to the rights or the merits of it, and take the
+ part of the weaker side.&mdash;And this was the reason why he was always
+ sure to be present at the trial of any universally execrated criminal to
+ oppress and intimidate the jury with a vindictive pantomime of what he
+ would do to them if he ever caught them out of the box. And this was why
+ harried cats and outlawed dogs that knew him confidently took sanctuary
+ under his chair in time of trouble. In the beginning he was the most
+ frantic and bloodthirsty Union man that drew breath in the shadow of the
+ Flag; but the instant the Southerners began to go down before the sweep of
+ the Northern armies, he ran up the Confederate colors and from that time
+ till the end was a rampant and inexorable secessionist.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He hated intemperance with a more uncompromising animosity than any
+ individual I have ever met, of either sex; and he was never tired of
+ storming against it and beseeching friends and strangers alike to be wary
+ and drink with moderation. And yet if any creature had been guileless
+ enough to intimate that his absorbing nine gallons of "straight" whiskey
+ during our voyage was any fraction short of rigid or inflexible
+ abstemiousness, in that self-same moment the old man would have spun him
+ to the uttermost parts of the earth in the whirlwind of his wrath. Mind, I
+ am not saying his whisky ever affected his head or his legs, for it did
+ not, in even the slightest degree. He was a capacious container, but he
+ did not hold enough for that. He took a level tumblerful of whisky every
+ morning before he put his clothes on&mdash;"to sweeten his bilgewater," he
+ said.&mdash;He took another after he got the most of his clothes on, "to
+ settle his mind and give him his bearings." He then shaved, and put on a
+ clean shirt; after which he recited the Lord's Prayer in a fervent,
+ thundering bass that shook the ship to her kelson and suspended all
+ conversation in the main cabin. Then, at this stage, being invariably "by
+ the head," or "by the stern," or "listed to port or starboard," he took
+ one more to "put him on an even keel so that he would mind his hellum and
+ not miss stays and go about, every time he came up in the wind."&mdash;And
+ now, his state-room door swung open and the sun of his benignant face
+ beamed redly out upon men and women and children, and he roared his
+ "Shipmets a'hoy!" in a way that was calculated to wake the dead and
+ precipitate the final resurrection; and forth he strode, a picture to look
+ at and a presence to enforce attention. Stalwart and portly; not a gray
+ hair; broadbrimmed slouch hat; semi-sailor toggery of blue navy flannel&mdash;roomy
+ and ample; a stately expanse of shirt-front and a liberal amount of black
+ silk neck-cloth tied with a sailor knot; large chain and imposing seals
+ impending from his fob; awe-inspiring feet, and "a hand like the hand of
+ Providence," as his whaling brethren expressed it; wrist-bands and sleeves
+ pushed back half way to the elbow, out of respect for the warm weather,
+ and exposing hairy arms, gaudy with red and blue anchors, ships, and
+ goddesses of liberty tattooed in India ink. But these details were only
+ secondary matters&mdash;his face was the lodestone that chained the eye.
+ It was a sultry disk, glowing determinedly out through a weather beaten
+ mask of mahogany, and studded with warts, seamed with scars, "blazed" all
+ over with unfailing fresh slips of the razor; and with cheery eyes, under
+ shaggy brows, contemplating the world from over the back of a gnarled crag
+ of a nose that loomed vast and lonely out of the undulating immensity that
+ spread away from its foundations. At his heels frisked the darling of his
+ bachelor estate, his terrier "Fan," a creature no larger than a squirrel.
+ The main part of his daily life was occupied in looking after "Fan," in a
+ motherly way, and doctoring her for a hundred ailments which existed only
+ in his imagination.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link448" id="link448"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="448.jpg (48K)" src="images/448.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Admiral seldom read newspapers; and when he did he never believed
+ anything they said. He read nothing, and believed in nothing, but "The Old
+ Guard," a secession periodical published in New York. He carried a dozen
+ copies of it with him, always, and referred to them for all required
+ information. If it was not there, he supplied it himself, out of a
+ bountiful fancy, inventing history, names, dates, and every thing else
+ necessary to make his point good in an argument. Consequently he was a
+ formidable antagonist in a dispute. Whenever he swung clear of the record
+ and began to create history, the enemy was helpless and had to surrender.
+ Indeed, the enemy could not keep from betraying some little spark of
+ indignation at his manufactured history&mdash;and when it came to
+ indignation, that was the Admiral's very "best hold." He was always ready
+ for a political argument, and if nobody started one he would do it
+ himself. With his third retort his temper would begin to rise, and within
+ five minutes he would be blowing a gale, and within fifteen his
+ smoking-room audience would be utterly stormed away and the old man left
+ solitary and alone, banging the table with his fist, kicking the chairs,
+ and roaring a hurricane of profanity. It got so, after a while, that
+ whenever the Admiral approached, with politics in his eye, the passengers
+ would drop out with quiet accord, afraid to meet him; and he would camp on
+ a deserted field.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link449" id="link449"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="449.jpg (34K)" src="images/449.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But he found his match at last, and before a full company. At one time or
+ another, everybody had entered the lists against him and been routed,
+ except the quiet passenger Williams. He had never been able to get an
+ expression of opinion out of him on politics. But now, just as the Admiral
+ drew near the door and the company were about to slip out, Williams said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Admiral, are you certain about that circumstance concerning the clergymen
+ you mentioned the other day?"&mdash;referring to a piece of the Admiral's
+ manufactured history.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Every one was amazed at the man's rashness. The idea of deliberately
+ inviting annihilation was a thing incomprehensible. The retreat came to a
+ halt; then everybody sat down again wondering, to await the upshot of it.
+ The Admiral himself was as surprised as any one. He paused in the door,
+ with his red handkerchief half raised to his sweating face, and
+ contemplated the daring reptile in the corner.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Certain of it? Am I certain of it? Do you think I've been lying about it?
+ What do you take me for? Anybody that don't know that circumstance, don't
+ know anything; a child ought to know it. Read up your history! Read it up&mdash;&mdash;-,
+ and don't come asking a man if he's certain about a bit of ABC stuff that
+ the very southern niggers know all about."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Here the Admiral's fires began to wax hot, the atmosphere thickened, the
+ coming earthquake rumbled, he began to thunder and lighten. Within three
+ minutes his volcano was in full irruption and he was discharging flames
+ and ashes of indignation, belching black volumes of foul history aloft,
+ and vomiting red-hot torrents of profanity from his crater. Meantime
+ Williams sat silent, and apparently deeply and earnestly interested in
+ what the old man was saying. By and by, when the lull came, he said in the
+ most deferential way, and with the gratified air of a man who has had a
+ mystery cleared up which had been puzzling him uncomfortably:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Now I understand it. I always thought I knew that piece of history well
+ enough, but was still afraid to trust it, because there was not that
+ convincing particularity about it that one likes to have in history; but
+ when you mentioned every name, the other day, and every date, and every
+ little circumstance, in their just order and sequence, I said to myself,
+ this sounds something like&mdash;this is history&mdash;this is putting it
+ in a shape that gives a man confidence; and I said to myself afterward, I
+ will just ask the Admiral if he is perfectly certain about the details,
+ and if he is I will come out and thank him for clearing this matter up for
+ me. And that is what I want to do now&mdash;for until you set that matter
+ right it was nothing but just a confusion in my mind, without head or tail
+ to it."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Nobody ever saw the Admiral look so mollified before, and so pleased.
+ Nobody had ever received his bogus history as gospel before; its
+ genuineness had always been called in question either by words or looks;
+ but here was a man that not only swallowed it all down, but was grateful
+ for the dose. He was taken a back; he hardly knew what to say; even his
+ profanity failed him. Now, Williams continued, modestly and earnestly:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "But Admiral, in saying that this was the first stone thrown, and that
+ this precipitated the war, you have overlooked a circumstance which you
+ are perfectly familiar with, but which has escaped your memory. Now I
+ grant you that what you have stated is correct in every detail&mdash;to
+ wit: that on the 16th of October, 1860, two Massachusetts clergymen, named
+ Waite and Granger, went in disguise to the house of John Moody, in
+ Rockport, at dead of night, and dragged forth two southern women and their
+ two little children, and after tarring and feathering them conveyed them
+ to Boston and burned them alive in the State House square; and I also
+ grant your proposition that this deed is what led to the secession of
+ South Carolina on the 20th of December following. Very well." [Here the
+ company were pleasantly surprised to hear Williams proceed to come back at
+ the Admiral with his own invincible weapon&mdash;clean, pure, manufactured
+ history, without a word of truth in it.] "Very well, I say. But Admiral,
+ why overlook the Willis and Morgan case in South Carolina? You are too
+ well informed a man not to know all about that circumstance. Your
+ arguments and your conversations have shown you to be intimately
+ conversant with every detail of this national quarrel. You develop matters
+ of history every day that show plainly that you are no smatterer in it,
+ content to nibble about the surface, but a man who has searched the depths
+ and possessed yourself of everything that has a bearing upon the great
+ question. Therefore, let me just recall to your mind that Willis and
+ Morgan case&mdash;though I see by your face that the whole thing is
+ already passing through your memory at this moment. On the 12th of August,
+ 1860, two months before the Waite and Granger affair, two South Carolina
+ clergymen, named John H. Morgan and Winthrop L. Willis, one a Methodist
+ and the other an Old School Baptist, disguised themselves, and went at
+ midnight to the house of a planter named Thompson&mdash;Archibald F.
+ Thompson, Vice President under Thomas Jefferson,&mdash;and took thence, at
+ midnight, his widowed aunt, (a Northern woman,) and her adopted child, an
+ orphan&mdash;named Mortimer Highie, afflicted with epilepsy and suffering
+ at the time from white swelling on one of his legs, and compelled to walk
+ on crutches in consequence; and the two ministers, in spite of the
+ pleadings of the victims, dragged them to the bush, tarred and feathered
+ them, and afterward burned them at the stake in the city of Charleston.
+ You remember perfectly well what a stir it made; you remember perfectly
+ well that even the Charleston Courier stigmatized the act as being
+ unpleasant, of questionable propriety, and scarcely justifiable, and
+ likewise that it would not be matter of surprise if retaliation ensued.
+ And you remember also, that this thing was the cause of the Massachusetts
+ outrage. Who, indeed, were the two Massachusetts ministers? and who were
+ the two Southern women they burned? I do not need to remind you, Admiral,
+ with your intimate knowledge of history, that Waite was the nephew of the
+ woman burned in Charleston; that Granger was her cousin in the second
+ degree, and that the woman they burned in Boston was the wife of John H.
+ Morgan, and the still loved but divorced wife of Winthrop L. Willis. Now,
+ Admiral, it is only fair that you should acknowledge that the first
+ provocation came from the Southern preachers and that the Northern ones
+ were justified in retaliating. In your arguments you never yet have shown
+ the least disposition to withhold a just verdict or be in anywise unfair,
+ when authoritative history condemned your position, and therefore I have
+ no hesitation in asking you to take the original blame from the
+ Massachusetts ministers, in this matter, and transfer it to the South
+ Carolina clergymen where it justly belongs."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link453" id="link453"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="453.jpg (44K)" src="images/453.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Admiral was conquered. This sweet spoken creature who swallowed his
+ fraudulent history as if it were the bread of life; basked in his furious
+ blasphemy as if it were generous sunshine; found only calm, even-handed
+ justice in his rampart partisanship; and flooded him with invented history
+ so sugarcoated with flattery and deference that there was no rejecting it,
+ was "too many" for him. He stammered some awkward, profane sentences about
+ the&mdash;&mdash;-Willis and Morgan business having escaped his memory,
+ but that he "remembered it now," and then, under pretence of giving Fan
+ some medicine for an imaginary cough, drew out of the battle and went
+ away, a vanquished man. Then cheers and laughter went up, and Williams,
+ the ship's benefactor was a hero. The news went about the vessel,
+ champagne was ordered, and enthusiastic reception instituted in the
+ smoking room, and everybody flocked thither to shake hands with the
+ conqueror. The wheelman said afterward, that the Admiral stood up behind
+ the pilot house and "ripped and cursed all to himself" till he loosened
+ the smokestack guys and becalmed the mainsail.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Admiral's power was broken. After that, if he began argument, somebody
+ would bring Williams, and the old man would grow weak and begin to quiet
+ down at once. And as soon as he was done, Williams in his dulcet,
+ insinuating way, would invent some history (referring for proof, to the
+ old man's own excellent memory and to copies of "The Old Guard" known not
+ to be in his possession) that would turn the tables completely and leave
+ the Admiral all abroad and helpless. By and by he came to so dread
+ Williams and his gilded tongue that he would stop talking when he saw him
+ approach, and finally ceased to mention politics altogether, and from that
+ time forward there was entire peace and serenity in the ship.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch63" id="linkch63"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On a certain bright morning the Islands hove in sight, lying low on the
+ lonely sea, and everybody climbed to the upper deck to look. After two
+ thousand miles of watery solitude the vision was a welcome one. As we
+ approached, the imposing promontory of Diamond Head rose up out of the
+ ocean its rugged front softened by the hazy distance, and presently the
+ details of the land began to make themselves manifest: first the line of
+ beach; then the plumed coacoanut trees of the tropics; then cabins of the
+ natives; then the white town of Honolulu, said to contain between twelve
+ and fifteen thousand inhabitants spread over a dead level; with streets
+ from twenty to thirty feet wide, solid and level as a floor, most of them
+ straight as a line and few as crooked as a corkscrew.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link455" id="link455"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="455.jpg (98K)" src="images/455.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The further I traveled through the town the better I liked it. Every step
+ revealed a new contrast&mdash;disclosed something I was unaccustomed to.
+ In place of the grand mud-colored brown fronts of San Francisco, I saw
+ dwellings built of straw, adobies, and cream-colored pebble-and-shell-
+ conglomerated coral, cut into oblong blocks and laid in cement; also a
+ great number of neat white cottages, with green window-shutters; in place
+ of front yards like billiard-tables with iron fences around them, I saw
+ these homes surrounded by ample yards, thickly clad with green grass, and
+ shaded by tall trees, through whose dense foliage the sun could scarcely
+ penetrate; in place of the customary geranium, calla lily, etc.,
+ languishing in dust and general debility, I saw luxurious banks and
+ thickets of flowers, fresh as a meadow after a rain, and glowing with the
+ richest dyes; in place of the dingy horrors of San Francisco's pleasure
+ grove, the "Willows," I saw huge-bodied, wide-spreading forest trees, with
+ strange names and stranger appearance&mdash;trees that cast a shadow like
+ a thunder-cloud, and were able to stand alone without being tied to green
+ poles; in place of gold fish, wiggling around in glass globes, assuming
+ countless shades and degrees of distortion through the magnifying and
+ diminishing qualities of their transparent prison houses, I saw cats&mdash;Tom-cats,
+ Mary Ann cats, long-tailed cats, bob-tailed cats, blind cats, one-eyed
+ cats, wall-eyed cats, cross-eyed cats, gray cats, black cats, white cats,
+ yellow cats, striped cats, spotted cats, tame cats, wild cats, singed
+ cats, individual cats, groups of cats, platoons of cats, companies of
+ cats, regiments of cats, armies of cats, multitudes of cats, millions of
+ cats, and all of them sleek, fat, lazy and sound asleep. I looked on a
+ multitude of people, some white, in white coats, vests, pantaloons, even
+ white cloth shoes, made snowy with chalk duly laid on every morning; but
+ the majority of the people were almost as dark as negroes&mdash;women with
+ comely features, fine black eyes, rounded forms, inclining to the
+ voluptuous, clad in a single bright red or white garment that fell free
+ and unconfined from shoulder to heel, long black hair falling loose, gypsy
+ hats, encircled with wreaths of natural flowers of a brilliant carmine
+ tint; plenty of dark men in various costumes, and some with nothing on but
+ a battered stove-pipe hat tilted on the nose, and a very scant
+ breech-clout;&mdash;certain smoke-dried children were clothed in nothing
+ but sunshine&mdash;a very neat fitting and picturesque apparel indeed.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link456" id="link456"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="456.jpg (25K)" src="images/456.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In place of roughs and rowdies staring and blackguarding on the corners, I
+ saw long-haired, saddle-colored Sandwich Island maidens sitting on the
+ ground in the shade of corner houses, gazing indolently at whatever or
+ whoever happened along; instead of wretched cobble-stone pavements, I
+ walked on a firm foundation of coral, built up from the bottom of the sea
+ by the absurd but persevering insect of that name, with a light layer of
+ lava and cinders overlying the coral, belched up out of fathomless
+ perdition long ago through the seared and blackened crater that stands
+ dead and harmless in the distance now; instead of cramped and crowded
+ street-cars, I met dusky native women sweeping by, free as the wind, on
+ fleet horses and astride, with gaudy riding-sashes, streaming like banners
+ behind them; instead of the combined stenches of Chinadom and Brannan
+ street slaughter-houses, I breathed the balmy fragrance of jessamine,
+ oleander, and the Pride of India; in place of the hurry and bustle and
+ noisy confusion of San Francisco, I moved in the midst of a Summer calm as
+ tranquil as dawn in the Garden of Eden; in place of the Golden City's
+ skirting sand hills and the placid bay, I saw on the one side a frame-work
+ of tall, precipitous mountains close at hand, clad in refreshing green,
+ and cleft by deep, cool, chasm-like valleys&mdash;and in front the grand
+ sweep of the ocean; a brilliant, transparent green near the shore, bound
+ and bordered by a long white line of foamy spray dashing against the reef,
+ and further out the dead blue water of the deep sea, flecked with "white
+ caps," and in the far horizon a single, lonely sail&mdash;a mere
+ accent-mark to emphasize a slumberous calm and a solitude that were
+ without sound or limit. When the sun sunk down&mdash;the one intruder from
+ other realms and persistent in suggestions of them&mdash;it was tranced
+ luxury to sit in the perfumed air and forget that there was any world but
+ these enchanted islands.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link457" id="link457"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="457.jpg (43K)" src="images/457.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was such ecstacy to dream, and dream&mdash;till you got a bite. A
+ scorpion bite. Then the first duty was to get up out of the grass and kill
+ the scorpion; and the next to bathe the bitten place with alcohol or
+ brandy; and the next to resolve to keep out of the grass in future. Then
+ came an adjournment to the bed-chamber and the pastime of writing up the
+ day's journal with one hand and the destruction of mosquitoes with the
+ other&mdash;a whole community of them at a slap. Then, observing an enemy
+ approaching,&mdash;a hairy tarantula on stilts&mdash;why not set the
+ spittoon on him? It is done, and the projecting ends of his paws give a
+ luminous idea of the magnitude of his reach. Then to bed and become a
+ promenade for a centipede with forty-two legs on a side and every foot hot
+ enough to burn a hole through a raw-hide. More soaking with alcohol, and a
+ resolution to examine the bed before entering it, in future. Then wait,
+ and suffer, till all the mosquitoes in the neighborhood have crawled in
+ under the bar, then slip out quickly, shut them in and sleep peacefully on
+ the floor till morning. Meantime it is comforting to curse the tropics in
+ occasional wakeful intervals.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We had an abundance of fruit in Honolulu, of course. Oranges, pine-
+ apples, bananas, strawberries, lemons, limes, mangoes, guavas, melons, and
+ a rare and curious luxury called the chirimoya, which is deliciousness
+ itself. Then there is the tamarind. I thought tamarinds were made to eat,
+ but that was probably not the idea. I ate several, and it seemed to me
+ that they were rather sour that year. They pursed up my lips, till they
+ resembled the stem-end of a tomato, and I had to take my sustenance
+ through a quill for twenty-four hours.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ They sharpened my teeth till I could have shaved with them, and gave them
+ a "wire edge" that I was afraid would stay; but a citizen said "no, it
+ will come off when the enamel does"&mdash;which was comforting, at any
+ rate. I found, afterward, that only strangers eat tamarinds&mdash;but they
+ only eat them once.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link458" id="link458"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="458.jpg (145K)" src="images/458.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch64" id="linkch64"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXIV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In my diary of our third day in Honolulu, I find this:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I am probably the most sensitive man in Hawaii to-night&mdash;especially
+ about sitting down in the presence of my betters. I have ridden fifteen or
+ twenty miles on horse-back since 5 P.M. and to tell the honest truth, I
+ have a delicacy about sitting down at all.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ An excursion to Diamond Head and the King's Coacoanut Grove was planned
+ to-day&mdash;time, 4:30 P.M.&mdash;the party to consist of half a dozen
+ gentlemen and three ladies. They all started at the appointed hour except
+ myself. I was at the Government prison, (with Captain Fish and another
+ whaleship- skipper, Captain Phillips,) and got so interested in its
+ examination that I did not notice how quickly the time was passing.
+ Somebody remarked that it was twenty minutes past five o'clock, and that
+ woke me up. It was a fortunate circumstance that Captain Phillips was
+ along with his "turn out," as he calls a top-buggy that Captain Cook
+ brought here in 1778, and a horse that was here when Captain Cook came.
+ Captain Phillips takes a just pride in his driving and in the speed of his
+ horse, and to his passion for displaying them I owe it that we were only
+ sixteen minutes coming from the prison to the American Hotel&mdash;a
+ distance which has been estimated to be over half a mile. But it took some
+ fearful driving. The Captain's whip came down fast, and the blows started
+ so much dust out of the horse's hide that during the last half of the
+ journey we rode through an impenetrable fog, and ran by a pocket compass
+ in the hands of Captain Fish, a whaler of twenty-six years experience, who
+ sat there through the perilous voyage as self-possessed as if he had been
+ on the euchre-deck of his own ship, and calmly said, "Port your helm&mdash;port,"
+ from time to time, and "Hold her a little free&mdash;steady&mdash;so&mdash;so,"
+ and "Luff&mdash;hard down to starboard!" and never once lost his presence
+ of mind or betrayed the least anxiety by voice or manner. When we came to
+ anchor at last, and Captain Phillips looked at his watch and said,
+ "Sixteen minutes&mdash;I told you it was in her! that's over three miles
+ an hour!" I could see he felt entitled to a compliment, and so I said I
+ had never seen lightning go like that horse. And I never had.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The landlord of the American said the party had been gone nearly an hour,
+ but that he could give me my choice of several horses that could overtake
+ them. I said, never mind&mdash;I preferred a safe horse to a fast one&mdash;I
+ would like to have an excessively gentle horse&mdash;a horse with no
+ spirit whatever&mdash;a lame one, if he had such a thing. Inside of five
+ minutes I was mounted, and perfectly satisfied with my outfit. I had no
+ time to label him "This is a horse," and so if the public took him for a
+ sheep I cannot help it. I was satisfied, and that was the main thing. I
+ could see that he had as many fine points as any man's horse, and so I
+ hung my hat on one of them, behind the saddle, and swabbed the
+ perspiration from my face and started. I named him after this island,
+ "Oahu" (pronounced O-waw-hee). The first gate he came to he started in; I
+ had neither whip nor spur, and so I simply argued the case with him. He
+ resisted argument, but ultimately yielded to insult and abuse. He backed
+ out of that gate and steered for another one on the other side of the
+ street. I triumphed by my former process. Within the next six hundred
+ yards he crossed the street fourteen times and attempted thirteen gates,
+ and in the meantime the tropical sun was beating down and threatening to
+ cave the top of my head in, and I was literally dripping with
+ perspiration. He abandoned the gate business after that and went along
+ peaceably enough, but absorbed in meditation. I noticed this latter
+ circumstance, and it soon began to fill me with apprehension. I said to my
+ self, this creature is planning some new outrage, some fresh deviltry or
+ other&mdash;no horse ever thought over a subject so profoundly as this one
+ is doing just for nothing. The more this thing preyed upon my mind the
+ more uneasy I became, until the suspense became almost unbearable and I
+ dismounted to see if there was anything wild in his eye&mdash;for I had
+ heard that the eye of this noblest of our domestic animals is very
+ expressive.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link461" id="link461"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="461.jpg (86K)" src="images/461.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I cannot describe what a load of anxiety was lifted from my mind when I
+ found that he was only asleep. I woke him up and started him into a faster
+ walk, and then the villainy of his nature came out again. He tried to
+ climb over a stone wall, five or six feet high. I saw that I must apply
+ force to this horse, and that I might as well begin first as last. I
+ plucked a stout switch from a tamarind tree, and the moment he saw it, he
+ surrendered. He broke into a convulsive sort of a canter, which had three
+ short steps in it and one long one, and reminded me alternately of the
+ clattering shake of the great earthquake, and the sweeping plunging of the
+ Ajax in a storm.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And now there can be no fitter occasion than the present to pronounce a
+ left-handed blessing upon the man who invented the American saddle. There
+ is no seat to speak of about it&mdash;one might as well sit in a shovel-
+ -and the stirrups are nothing but an ornamental nuisance. If I were to
+ write down here all the abuse I expended on those stirrups, it would make
+ a large book, even without pictures. Sometimes I got one foot so far
+ through, that the stirrup partook of the nature of an anklet; sometimes
+ both feet were through, and I was handcuffed by the legs; and sometimes my
+ feet got clear out and left the stirrups wildly dangling about my shins.
+ Even when I was in proper position and carefully balanced upon the balls
+ of my feet, there was no comfort in it, on account of my nervous dread
+ that they were going to slip one way or the other in a moment. But the
+ subject is too exasperating to write about.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A mile and a half from town, I came to a grove of tall cocoanut trees,
+ with clean, branchless stems reaching straight up sixty or seventy feet
+ and topped with a spray of green foliage sheltering clusters of cocoa-
+ nuts&mdash;not more picturesque than a forest of collossal ragged
+ parasols, with bunches of magnified grapes under them, would be.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I once heard a gouty northern invalid say that a cocoanut tree might be
+ poetical, possibly it was; but it looked like a feather-duster struck by
+ lightning. I think that describes it better than a picture&mdash;and yet,
+ without any question, there is something fascinating about a cocoa-nut
+ tree&mdash;and graceful, too.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link462" id="link462"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="462.jpg (29K)" src="images/462.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ About a dozen cottages, some frame and the others of native grass, nestled
+ sleepily in the shade here and there. The grass cabins are of a grayish
+ color, are shaped much like our own cottages, only with higher and steeper
+ roofs usually, and are made of some kind of weed strongly bound together
+ in bundles. The roofs are very thick, and so are the walls; the latter
+ have square holes in them for windows. At a little distance these cabins
+ have a furry appearance, as if they might be made of bear skins. They are
+ very cool and pleasant inside. The King's flag was flying from the roof of
+ one of the cottages, and His Majesty was probably within. He owns the
+ whole concern thereabouts, and passes his time there frequently, on sultry
+ days "laying off." The spot is called "The King's Grove."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Near by is an interesting ruin&mdash;the meagre remains of an ancient
+ heathen temple&mdash;a place where human sacrifices were offered up in
+ those old bygone days when the simple child of nature, yielding
+ momentarily to sin when sorely tempted, acknowledged his error when calm
+ reflection had shown it him, and came forward with noble frankness and
+ offered up his grandmother as an atoning sacrifice&mdash;in those old days
+ when the luckless sinner could keep on cleansing his conscience and
+ achieving periodical happiness as long as his relations held out; long,
+ long before the missionaries braved a thousand privations to come and make
+ them permanently miserable by telling them how beautiful and how blissful
+ a place heaven is, and how nearly impossible it is to get there; and
+ showed the poor native how dreary a place perdition is and what
+ unnecessarily liberal facilities there are for going to it; showed him
+ how, in his ignorance he had gone and fooled away all his kinfolks to no
+ purpose; showed him what rapture it is to work all day long for fifty
+ cents to buy food for next day with, as compared with fishing for pastime
+ and lolling in the shade through eternal Summer, and eating of the bounty
+ that nobody labored to provide but Nature. How sad it is to think of the
+ multitudes who have gone to their graves in this beautiful island and
+ never knew there was a hell!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This ancient temple was built of rough blocks of lava, and was simply a
+ roofless inclosure a hundred and thirty feet long and seventy wide&mdash;nothing
+ but naked walls, very thick, but not much higher than a man's head. They
+ will last for ages no doubt, if left unmolested. Its three altars and
+ other sacred appurtenances have crumbled and passed away years ago. It is
+ said that in the old times thousands of human beings were slaughtered
+ here, in the presence of naked and howling savages. If these mute stones
+ could speak, what tales they could tell, what pictures they could
+ describe, of fettered victims writhing under the knife; of massed forms
+ straining forward out of the gloom, with ferocious faces lit up by the
+ sacrificial fires; of the background of ghostly trees; of the dark pyramid
+ of Diamond Head standing sentinel over the uncanny scene, and the peaceful
+ moon looking down upon it through rifts in the cloud-rack!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When Kamehameha (pronounced Ka-may-ha-may-ah) the Great&mdash;who was a
+ sort of a Napoleon in military genius and uniform success&mdash;invaded
+ this island of Oahu three quarters of a century ago, and exterminated the
+ army sent to oppose him, and took full and final possession of the
+ country, he searched out the dead body of the King of Oahu, and those of
+ the principal chiefs, and impaled their heads on the walls of this temple.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Those were savage times when this old slaughter-house was in its prime.
+ The King and the chiefs ruled the common herd with a rod of iron; made
+ them gather all the provisions the masters needed; build all the houses
+ and temples; stand all the expenses, of whatever kind; take kicks and
+ cuffs for thanks; drag out lives well flavored with misery, and then
+ suffer death for trifling offences or yield up their lives on the
+ sacrificial altars to purchase favors from the gods for their hard rulers.
+ The missionaries have clothed them, educated them, broken up the tyrannous
+ authority of their chiefs, and given them freedom and the right to enjoy
+ whatever their hands and brains produce with equal laws for all, and
+ punishment for all alike who transgress them. The contrast is so strong&mdash;the
+ benefit conferred upon this people by the missionaries is so prominent, so
+ palpable and so unquestionable, that the frankest compliment I can pay
+ them, and the best, is simply to point to the condition of the Sandwich
+ Islanders of Captain Cook's time, and their condition to-day.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Their work speaks for itself.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch65" id="linkch65"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By and by, after a rugged climb, we halted on the summit of a hill which
+ commanded a far-reaching view. The moon rose and flooded mountain and
+ valley and ocean with a mellow radiance, and out of the shadows of the
+ foliage the distant lights of Honolulu glinted like an encampment of
+ fireflies. The air was heavy with the fragrance of flowers. The halt was
+ brief.&mdash;Gayly laughing and talking, the party galloped on, and I
+ clung to the pommel and cantered after. Presently we came to a place where
+ no grass grew&mdash;a wide expanse of deep sand. They said it was an old
+ battle ground. All around everywhere, not three feet apart, the bleached
+ bones of men gleamed white in the moonlight. We picked up a lot of them
+ for mementoes. I got quite a number of arm bones and leg bones&mdash;of
+ great chiefs, may be, who had fought savagely in that fearful battle in
+ the old days, when blood flowed like wine where we now stood&mdash;and
+ wore the choicest of them out on Oahu afterward, trying to make him go.
+ All sorts of bones could be found except skulls; but a citizen said,
+ irreverently, that there had been an unusual number of "skull-hunters"
+ there lately&mdash;a species of sportsmen I had never heard of before.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Nothing whatever is known about this place&mdash;its story is a secret
+ that will never be revealed. The oldest natives make no pretense of being
+ possessed of its history. They say these bones were here when they were
+ children. They were here when their grandfathers were children&mdash;but
+ how they came here, they can only conjecture. Many people believe this
+ spot to be an ancient battle-ground, and it is usual to call it so; and
+ they believe that these skeletons have lain for ages just where their
+ proprietors fell in the great fight. Other people believe that Kamehameha
+ I. fought his first battle here. On this point, I have heard a story,
+ which may have been taken from one of the numerous books which have been
+ written concerning these islands&mdash;I do not know where the narrator
+ got it. He said that when Kamehameha (who was at first merely a
+ subordinate chief on the island of Hawaii), landed here, he brought a
+ large army with him, and encamped at Waikiki. The Oahuans marched against
+ him, and so confident were they of success that they readily acceded to a
+ demand of their priests that they should draw a line where these bones now
+ lie, and take an oath that, if forced to retreat at all, they would never
+ retreat beyond this boundary. The priests told them that death and
+ everlasting punishment would overtake any who violated the oath, and the
+ march was resumed. Kamehameha drove them back step by step; the priests
+ fought in the front rank and exhorted them both by voice and inspiriting
+ example to remember their oath&mdash;to die, if need be, but never cross
+ the fatal line. The struggle was manfully maintained, but at last the
+ chief priest fell, pierced to the heart with a spear, and the unlucky omen
+ fell like a blight upon the brave souls at his back; with a triumphant
+ shout the invaders pressed forward&mdash;the line was crossed&mdash;the
+ offended gods deserted the despairing army, and, accepting the doom their
+ perjury had brought upon them, they broke and fled over the plain where
+ Honolulu stands now&mdash;up the beautiful Nuuanu Valley&mdash;paused a
+ moment, hemmed in by precipitous mountains on either hand and the
+ frightful precipice of the Pari in front, and then were driven over&mdash;a
+ sheer plunge of six hundred feet!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The story is pretty enough, but Mr. Jarves' excellent history says the
+ Oahuans were intrenched in Nuuanu Valley; that Kamehameha ousted them,
+ routed them, pursued them up the valley and drove them over the precipice.
+ He makes no mention of our bone-yard at all in his book.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Impressed by the profound silence and repose that rested over the
+ beautiful landscape, and being, as usual, in the rear, I gave voice to my
+ thoughts. I said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "What a picture is here slumbering in the solemn glory of the moon! How
+ strong the rugged outlines of the dead volcano stand out against the clear
+ sky! What a snowy fringe marks the bursting of the surf over the long,
+ curved reef! How calmly the dim city sleeps yonder in the plain! How soft
+ the shadows lie upon the stately mountains that border the dream-haunted
+ Mauoa Valley! What a grand pyramid of billowy clouds towers above the
+ storied Pari! How the grim warriors of the past seem flocking in ghostly
+ squadrons to their ancient battlefield again&mdash;how the wails of the
+ dying well up from the&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At this point the horse called Oahu sat down in the sand. Sat down to
+ listen, I suppose. Never mind what he heard, I stopped apostrophising and
+ convinced him that I was not a man to allow contempt of Court on the part
+ of a horse. I broke the back-bone of a Chief over his rump and set out to
+ join the cavalcade again.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link467" id="link467"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="467.jpg (33K)" src="images/467.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Very considerably fagged out we arrived in town at 9 o'clock at night,
+ myself in the lead&mdash;for when my horse finally came to understand that
+ he was homeward bound and hadn't far to go, he turned his attention
+ strictly to business.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This is a good time to drop in a paragraph of information. There is no
+ regular livery stable in Honolulu, or, indeed, in any part of the Kingdom
+ of Hawaii; therefore unless you are acquainted with wealthy residents (who
+ all have good horses), you must hire animals of the wretchedest
+ description from the Kanakas. (i.e. natives.) Any horse you hire, even
+ though it be from a white man, is not often of much account, because it
+ will be brought in for you from some ranch, and has necessarily been
+ leading a hard life. If the Kanakas who have been caring for him
+ (inveterate riders they are) have not ridden him half to death every day
+ themselves, you can depend upon it they have been doing the same thing by
+ proxy, by clandestinely hiring him out. At least, so I am informed. The
+ result is, that no horse has a chance to eat, drink, rest, recuperate, or
+ look well or feel well, and so strangers go about the Islands mounted as I
+ was to-day.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In hiring a horse from a Kanaka, you must have all your eyes about you,
+ because you can rest satisfied that you are dealing with a shrewd
+ unprincipled rascal. You may leave your door open and your trunk unlocked
+ as long as you please, and he will not meddle with your property; he has
+ no important vices and no inclination to commit robbery on a large scale;
+ but if he can get ahead of you in the horse business, he will take a
+ genuine delight in doing it. This traits is characteristic of horse
+ jockeys, the world over, is it not? He will overcharge you if he can; he
+ will hire you a fine-looking horse at night (anybody's&mdash;may be the
+ King's, if the royal steed be in convenient view), and bring you the mate
+ to my Oahu in the morning, and contend that it is the same animal. If you
+ make trouble, he will get out by saying it was not himself who made the
+ bargain with you, but his brother, "who went out in the country this
+ morning." They have always got a "brother" to shift the responsibility
+ upon. A victim said to one of these fellows one day:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "But I know I hired the horse of you, because I noticed that scar on your
+ cheek."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The reply was not bad: "Oh, yes&mdash;yes&mdash;my brother all same&mdash;we
+ twins!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link469" id="link469"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="469.jpg (81K)" src="images/469.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A friend of mine, J. Smith, hired a horse yesterday, the Kanaka warranting
+ him to be in excellent condition.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Smith had a saddle and blanket of his own, and he ordered the Kanaka to
+ put these on the horse. The Kanaka protested that he was perfectly willing
+ to trust the gentleman with the saddle that was already on the animal, but
+ Smith refused to use it. The change was made; then Smith noticed that the
+ Kanaka had only changed the saddles, and had left the original blanket on
+ the horse; he said he forgot to change the blankets, and so, to cut the
+ bother short, Smith mounted and rode away. The horse went lame a mile from
+ town, and afterward got to cutting up some extraordinary capers. Smith got
+ down and took off the saddle, but the blanket stuck fast to the horse&mdash;glued
+ to a procession of raw places. The Kanaka's mysterious conduct stood
+ explained.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link470" id="link470"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="470.jpg (33K)" src="images/470.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Another friend of mine bought a pretty good horse from a native, a day or
+ two ago, after a tolerably thorough examination of the animal. He
+ discovered today that the horse was as blind as a bat, in one eye. He
+ meant to have examined that eye, and came home with a general notion that
+ he had done it; but he remembers now that every time he made the attempt
+ his attention was called to something else by his victimizer.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ One more instance, and then I will pass to something else. I am informed
+ that when a certain Mr. L., a visiting stranger, was here, he bought a
+ pair of very respectable-looking match horses from a native. They were in
+ a little stable with a partition through the middle of it&mdash;one horse
+ in each apartment. Mr. L. examined one of them critically through a window
+ (the Kanaka's "brother" having gone to the country with the key), and then
+ went around the house and examined the other through a window on the other
+ side. He said it was the neatest match he had ever seen, and paid for the
+ horses on the spot. Whereupon the Kanaka departed to join his brother in
+ the country. The fellow had shamefully swindled L. There was only one
+ "match" horse, and he had examined his starboard side through one window
+ and his port side through another! I decline to believe this story, but I
+ give it because it is worth something as a fanciful illustration of a
+ fixed fact&mdash;namely, that the Kanaka horse- jockey is fertile in
+ invention and elastic in conscience.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ You can buy a pretty good horse for forty or fifty dollars, and a good
+ enough horse for all practical purposes for two dollars and a half. I
+ estimate "Oahu" to be worth somewhere in the neighborhood of thirty-five
+ cents. A good deal better animal than he is was sold here day before
+ yesterday for a dollar and seventy-five cents, and sold again to-day for
+ two dollars and twenty-five cents; Williams bought a handsome and lively
+ little pony yesterday for ten dollars; and about the best common horse on
+ the island (and he is a really good one) sold yesterday, with Mexican
+ saddle and bridle, for seventy dollars&mdash;a horse which is well and
+ widely known, and greatly respected for his speed, good disposition and
+ everlasting bottom.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ You give your horse a little grain once a day; it comes from San
+ Francisco, and is worth about two cents a pound; and you give him as much
+ hay as he wants; it is cut and brought to the market by natives, and is
+ not very good it is baled into long, round bundles, about the size of a
+ large man; one of them is stuck by the middle on each end of a six foot
+ pole, and the Kanaka shoulders the pole and walks about the streets
+ between the upright bales in search of customers. These hay bales, thus
+ carried, have a general resemblance to a colossal capital 'H.'
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link471" id="link471"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="471.jpg (59K)" src="images/471.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The hay-bundles cost twenty-five cents apiece, and one will last a horse
+ about a day. You can get a horse for a song, a week's hay for another
+ song, and you can turn your animal loose among the luxuriant grass in your
+ neighbor's broad front yard without a song at all&mdash;you do it at
+ midnight, and stable the beast again before morning. You have been at no
+ expense thus far, but when you come to buy a saddle and bridle they will
+ cost you from twenty to thirty-five dollars. You can hire a horse, saddle
+ and bridle at from seven to ten dollars a week, and the owner will take
+ care of them at his own expense.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It is time to close this day's record&mdash;bed time. As I prepare for
+ sleep, a rich voice rises out of the still night, and, far as this ocean
+ rock is toward the ends of the earth, I recognize a familiar home air. But
+ the words seem somewhat out of joint:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Waikiki lantoni oe Kaa hooly hooly wawhoo."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Translated, that means "When we were marching through Georgia."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link472" id="link472"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="472.jpg (28K)" src="images/472.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch66" id="linkch66"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXVI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Passing through the market place we saw that feature of Honolulu under its
+ most favorable auspices&mdash;that is, in the full glory of Saturday
+ afternoon, which is a festive day with the natives. The native girls by
+ twos and threes and parties of a dozen, and sometimes in whole platoons
+ and companies, went cantering up and down the neighboring streets astride
+ of fleet but homely horses, and with their gaudy riding habits streaming
+ like banners behind them. Such a troop of free and easy riders, in their
+ natural home, the saddle, makes a gay and graceful spectacle. The riding
+ habit I speak of is simply a long, broad scarf, like a tavern table cloth
+ brilliantly colored, wrapped around the loins once, then apparently passed
+ between the limbs and each end thrown backward over the same, and floating
+ and flapping behind on both sides beyond the horse's tail like a couple of
+ fancy flags; then, slipping the stirrup-irons between her toes, the girl
+ throws her chest forward, sits up like a Major General and goes sweeping
+ by like the wind.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link474" id="link474"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="474.jpg (88K)" src="images/474.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The girls put on all the finery they can on Saturday afternoon&mdash;fine
+ black silk robes; flowing red ones that nearly put your eyes out; others
+ as white as snow; still others that discount the rainbow; and they wear
+ their hair in nets, and trim their jaunty hats with fresh flowers, and
+ encircle their dusky throats with home-made necklaces of the brilliant
+ vermillion-tinted blossom of the ohia; and they fill the markets and the
+ adjacent street with their bright presences, and smell like a rag factory
+ on fire with their offensive cocoanut oil.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Occasionally you see a heathen from the sunny isles away down in the South
+ Seas, with his face and neck tatooed till he looks like the customary
+ mendicant from Washoe who has been blown up in a mine. Some are tattooed a
+ dead blue color down to the upper lip&mdash;masked, as it were&mdash;leaving
+ the natural light yellow skin of Micronesia unstained from thence down;
+ some with broad marks drawn down from hair to neck, on both sides of the
+ face, and a strip of the original yellow skin, two inches wide, down the
+ center&mdash;a gridiron with a spoke broken out; and some with the entire
+ face discolored with the popular mortification tint, relieved only by one
+ or two thin, wavy threads of natural yellow running across the face from
+ ear to ear, and eyes twinkling out of this darkness, from under shadowing
+ hat-brims, like stars in the dark of the moon.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Moving among the stirring crowds, you come to the poi merchants, squatting
+ in the shade on their hams, in true native fashion, and surrounded by
+ purchasers. (The Sandwich Islanders always squat on their hams, and who
+ knows but they may be the old original "ham sandwiches?" The thought is
+ pregnant with interest.) The poi looks like common flour paste, and is
+ kept in large bowls formed of a species of gourd, and capable of holding
+ from one to three or four gallons. Poi is the chief article of food among
+ the natives, and is prepared from the taro plant.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link475" id="link475"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="475.jpg (33K)" src="images/475.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The taro root looks like a thick, or, if you please, a corpulent sweet
+ potato, in shape, but is of a light purple color when boiled. When boiled
+ it answers as a passable substitute for bread. The buck Kanakas bake it
+ under ground, then mash it up well with a heavy lava pestle, mix water
+ with it until it becomes a paste, set it aside and let if ferment, and
+ then it is poi&mdash;and an unseductive mixture it is, almost tasteless
+ before it ferments and too sour for a luxury afterward. But nothing is
+ more nutritious. When solely used, however, it produces acrid humors, a
+ fact which sufficiently accounts for the humorous character of the
+ Kanakas. I think there must be as much of a knack in handling poi as there
+ is in eating with chopsticks. The forefinger is thrust into the mess and
+ stirred quickly round several times and drawn as quickly out, thickly
+ coated, just as it it were poulticed; the head is thrown back, the finger
+ inserted in the mouth and the delicacy stripped off and swallowed&mdash;the
+ eye closing gently, meanwhile, in a languid sort of ecstasy. Many a
+ different finger goes into the same bowl and many a different kind of dirt
+ and shade and quality of flavor is added to the virtues of its contents.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Around a small shanty was collected a crowd of natives buying the awa
+ root. It is said that but for the use of this root the destruction of the
+ people in former times by certain imported diseases would have been far
+ greater than it was, and by others it is said that this is merely a fancy.
+ All agree that poi will rejuvenate a man who is used up and his vitality
+ almost annihilated by hard drinking, and that in some kinds of diseases it
+ will restore health after all medicines have failed; but all are not
+ willing to allow to the awa the virtues claimed for it. The natives
+ manufacture an intoxicating drink from it which is fearful in its effects
+ when persistently indulged in. It covers the body with dry, white scales,
+ inflames the eyes, and causes premature decripitude. Although the man
+ before whose establishment we stopped has to pay a Government license of
+ eight hundred dollars a year for the exclusive right to sell awa root, it
+ is said that he makes a small fortune every twelve-month; while saloon
+ keepers, who pay a thousand dollars a year for the privilege of retailing
+ whiskey, etc., only make a bare living.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We found the fish market crowded; for the native is very fond of fish, and
+ eats the article raw and alive! Let us change the subject.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In old times here Saturday was a grand gala day indeed. All the native
+ population of the town forsook their labors, and those of the surrounding
+ country journeyed to the city. Then the white folks had to stay indoors,
+ for every street was so packed with charging cavaliers and cavalieresses
+ that it was next to impossible to thread one's way through the cavalcades
+ without getting crippled.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At night they feasted and the girls danced the lascivious hula hula&mdash;a
+ dance that is said to exhibit the very perfection of educated notion of
+ limb and arm, hand, head and body, and the exactest uniformity of movement
+ and accuracy of "time." It was performed by a circle of girls with no
+ raiment on them to speak of, who went through an infinite variety of
+ motions and figures without prompting, and yet so true was their "time,"
+ and in such perfect concert did they move that when they were placed in a
+ straight line, hands, arms, bodies, limbs and heads waved, swayed,
+ gesticulated, bowed, stooped, whirled, squirmed, twisted and undulated as
+ if they were part and parcel of a single individual; and it was difficult
+ to believe they were not moved in a body by some exquisite piece of
+ mechanism.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Of late years, however, Saturday has lost most of its quondam gala
+ features. This weekly stampede of the natives interfered too much with
+ labor and the interests of the white folks, and by sticking in a law here,
+ and preaching a sermon there, and by various other means, they gradually
+ broke it up. The demoralizing hula hula was forbidden to be performed,
+ save at night, with closed doors, in presence of few spectators, and only
+ by permission duly procured from the authorities and the payment of ten
+ dollars for the same. There are few girls now-a-days able to dance this
+ ancient national dance in the highest perfection of the art.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The missionaries have christianized and educated all the natives. They all
+ belong to the Church, and there is not one of them, above the age of eight
+ years, but can read and write with facility in the native tongue. It is
+ the most universally educated race of people outside of China. They have
+ any quantity of books, printed in the Kanaka language, and all the natives
+ are fond of reading. They are inveterate church-goers&mdash;nothing can
+ keep them away. All this ameliorating cultivation has at last built up in
+ the native women a profound respect for chastity&mdash;in other people.
+ Perhaps that is enough to say on that head. The national sin will die out
+ when the race does, but perhaps not earlier.&mdash;But doubtless this
+ purifying is not far off, when we reflect that contact with civilization
+ and the whites has reduced the native population from four hundred
+ thousand (Captain Cook's estimate,) to fifty-five thousand in something
+ over eighty years!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Society is a queer medley in this notable missionary, whaling and
+ governmental centre. If you get into conversation with a stranger and
+ experience that natural desire to know what sort of ground you are
+ treading on by finding out what manner of man your stranger is, strike out
+ boldly and address him as "Captain." Watch him narrowly, and if you see by
+ his countenance that you are on the wrong tack, ask him where he preaches.
+ It is a safe bet that he is either a missionary or captain of a whaler. I
+ am now personally acquainted with seventy-two captains and ninety-six
+ missionaries. The captains and ministers form one-half of the population;
+ the third fourth is composed of common Kanakas and mercantile foreigners
+ and their families, and the final fourth is made up of high officers of
+ the Hawaiian Government. And there are just about cats enough for three
+ apiece all around.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A solemn stranger met me in the suburbs the other day, and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Good morning, your reverence. Preach in the stone church yonder, no
+ doubt?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No, I don't. I'm not a preacher."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Really, I beg your pardon, Captain. I trust you had a good season. How
+ much oil"&mdash;
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oil? What do you take me for? I'm not a whaler."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh, I beg a thousand pardons, your Excellency.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Major General in the household troops, no doubt? Minister of the
+ Interior, likely? Secretary of war? First Gentleman of the Bed-chamber?
+ Commissioner of the Royal"&mdash;
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Stuff! I'm no official. I'm not connected in any way with the
+ Government."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Bless my life! Then, who the mischief are you? what the mischief are you?
+ and how the mischief did you get here, and where in thunder did you come
+ from?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I'm only a private personage&mdash;an unassuming stranger&mdash;lately
+ arrived from America."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No? Not a missionary! Not a whaler! not a member of his Majesty's
+ Government! not even Secretary of the Navy! Ah, Heaven! it is too blissful
+ to be true; alas, I do but dream. And yet that noble, honest countenance&mdash;those
+ oblique, ingenuous eyes&mdash;that massive head, incapable of&mdash;of&mdash;anything;
+ your hand; give me your hand, bright waif. Excuse these tears. For sixteen
+ weary years I have yearned for a moment like this, and"&mdash;
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link478" id="link478"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="478.jpg (67K)" src="images/478.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Here his feelings were too much for him, and he swooned away. I pitied
+ this poor creature from the bottom of my heart. I was deeply moved. I shed
+ a few tears on him and kissed him for his mother. I then took what small
+ change he had and "shoved".
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link479" id="link479"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="479.jpg (31K)" src="images/479.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch67" id="linkch67"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXVII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I still quote from my journal:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I found the national Legislature to consist of half a dozen white men and
+ some thirty or forty natives. It was a dark assemblage. The nobles and
+ Ministers (about a dozen of them altogether) occupied the extreme left of
+ the hall, with David Kalakaua (the King's Chamberlain) and Prince William
+ at the head. The President of the Assembly, His Royal Highness M.
+ Kekuanaoa, [Kekuanaoa is not of the blood royal. He derives his princely
+ rank from his wife, who was a daughter of Kamehameha the Great. Under
+ other monarchies the male line takes precedence of the female in tracing
+ genealogies, but here the opposite is the case&mdash;the female line takes
+ precedence. Their reason for this is exceedingly sensible, and I recommend
+ it to the aristocracy of Europe: They say it is easy to know who a man's
+ mother was, but, etc., etc.] and the Vice President (the latter a white
+ man,) sat in the pulpit, if I may so term it. The President is the King's
+ father. He is an erect, strongly built, massive featured, white-haired,
+ tawny old gentleman of eighty years of age or thereabouts. He was simply
+ but well dressed, in a blue cloth coat and white vest, and white
+ pantaloons, without spot, dust or blemish upon them. He bears himself with
+ a calm, stately dignity, and is a man of noble presence. He was a young
+ man and a distinguished warrior under that terrific fighter, Kamehameha
+ I., more than half a century ago. A knowledge of his career suggested some
+ such thought as this: "This man, naked as the day he was born, and
+ war-club and spear in hand, has charged at the head of a horde of savages
+ against other hordes of savages more than a generation and a half ago, and
+ reveled in slaughter and carnage; has worshipped wooden images on his
+ devout knees; has seen hundreds of his race offered up in heathen temples
+ as sacrifices to wooden idols, at a time when no missionary's foot had
+ ever pressed this soil, and he had never heard of the white man's God; has
+ believed his enemy could secretly pray him to death; has seen the day, in
+ his childhood, when it was a crime punishable by death for a man to eat
+ with his wife, or for a plebeian to let his shadow fall upon the King&mdash;and
+ now look at him; an educated Christian; neatly and handsomely dressed; a
+ high-minded, elegant gentleman; a traveler, in some degree, and one who
+ has been the honored guest of royalty in Europe; a man practiced in
+ holding the reins of an enlightened government, and well versed in the
+ politics of his country and in general, practical information. Look at
+ him, sitting there presiding over the deliberations of a legislative body,
+ among whom are white men&mdash;a grave, dignified, statesmanlike
+ personage, and as seemingly natural and fitted to the place as if he had
+ been born in it and had never been out of it in his life time. How the
+ experiences of this old man's eventful life shame the cheap inventions of
+ romance!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The christianizing of the natives has hardly even weakened some of their
+ barbarian superstitions, much less destroyed them. I have just referred to
+ one of these. It is still a popular belief that if your enemy can get hold
+ of any article belonging to you he can get down on his knees over it and
+ pray you to death. Therefore many a native gives up and dies merely
+ because he imagines that some enemy is putting him through a course of
+ damaging prayer. This praying an individual to death seems absurd enough
+ at a first glance, but then when we call to mind some of the pulpit
+ efforts of certain of our own ministers the thing looks plausible.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link482" id="link482"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="482.jpg (33K)" src="images/482.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In former times, among the Islanders, not only a plurality of wives was
+ customary, but a plurality of husbands likewise. Some native women of
+ noble rank had as many as six husbands. A woman thus supplied did not
+ reside with all her husbands at once, but lived several months with each
+ in turn. An understood sign hung at her door during these months. When the
+ sign was taken down, it meant "NEXT."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In those days woman was rigidly taught to "know her place." Her place was
+ to do all the work, take all the cuffs, provide all the food, and content
+ herself with what was left after her lord had finished his dinner. She was
+ not only forbidden, by ancient law, and under penalty of death, to eat
+ with her husband or enter a canoe, but was debarred, under the same
+ penalty, from eating bananas, pine-apples, oranges and other choice fruits
+ at any time or in any place. She had to confine herself pretty strictly to
+ "poi" and hard work. These poor ignorant heathen seem to have had a sort
+ of groping idea of what came of woman eating fruit in the garden of Eden,
+ and they did not choose to take any more chances. But the missionaries
+ broke up this satisfactory arrangement of things. They liberated woman and
+ made her the equal of man.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The natives had a romantic fashion of burying some of their children alive
+ when the family became larger than necessary. The missionaries interfered
+ in this matter too, and stopped it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ To this day the natives are able to lie down and die whenever they want
+ to, whether there is anything the matter with them or not. If a Kanaka
+ takes a notion to die, that is the end of him; nobody can persuade him to
+ hold on; all the doctors in the world could not save him.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A luxury which they enjoy more than anything else, is a large funeral. If
+ a person wants to get rid of a troublesome native, it is only necessary to
+ promise him a fine funeral and name the hour and he will be on hand to the
+ minute&mdash;at least his remains will.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ All the natives are Christians, now, but many of them still desert to the
+ Great Shark God for temporary succor in time of trouble. An irruption of
+ the great volcano of Kilauea, or an earthquake, always brings a deal of
+ latent loyalty to the Great Shark God to the surface. It is common report
+ that the King, educated, cultivated and refined Christian gentleman as he
+ undoubtedly is, still turns to the idols of his fathers for help when
+ disaster threatens. A planter caught a shark, and one of his christianized
+ natives testified his emancipation from the thrall of ancient superstition
+ by assisting to dissect the shark after a fashion forbidden by his
+ abandoned creed. But remorse shortly began to torture him. He grew moody
+ and sought solitude; brooded over his sin, refused food, and finally said
+ he must die and ought to die, for he had sinned against the Great Shark
+ God and could never know peace any more. He was proof against persuasion
+ and ridicule, and in the course of a day or two took to his bed and died,
+ although he showed no symptom of disease. His young daughter followed his
+ lead and suffered a like fate within the week. Superstition is ingrained
+ in the native blood and bone and it is only natural that it should crop
+ out in time of distress. Wherever one goes in the Islands, he will find
+ small piles of stones by the wayside, covered with leafy offerings, placed
+ there by the natives to appease evil spirits or honor local deities
+ belonging to the mythology of former days.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In the rural districts of any of the Islands, the traveler hourly comes
+ upon parties of dusky maidens bathing in the streams or in the sea without
+ any clothing on and exhibiting no very intemperate zeal in the matter of
+ hiding their nakedness. When the missionaries first took up their
+ residence in Honolulu, the native women would pay their families frequent
+ friendly visits, day by day, not even clothed with a blush. It was found a
+ hard matter to convince them that this was rather indelicate. Finally the
+ missionaries provided them with long, loose calico robes, and that ended
+ the difficulty&mdash;for the women would troop through the town, stark
+ naked, with their robes folded under their arms, march to the missionary
+ houses and then proceed to dress!&mdash;
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link484" id="link484"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="484.jpg (63K)" src="images/484.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The natives soon manifested a strong proclivity for clothing, but it was
+ shortly apparent that they only wanted it for grandeur. The missionaries
+ imported a quantity of hats, bonnets, and other male and female wearing
+ apparel, instituted a general distribution, and begged the people not to
+ come to church naked, next Sunday, as usual. And they did not; but the
+ national spirit of unselfishness led them to divide up with neighbors who
+ were not at the distribution, and next Sabbath the poor preachers could
+ hardly keep countenance before their vast congregations. In the midst of
+ the reading of a hymn a brown, stately dame would sweep up the aisle with
+ a world of airs, with nothing in the world on but a "stovepipe" hat and a
+ pair of cheap gloves; another dame would follow, tricked out in a man's
+ shirt, and nothing else; another one would enter with a flourish, with
+ simply the sleeves of a bright calico dress tied around her waist and the
+ rest of the garment dragging behind like a peacock's tail off duty; a
+ stately "buck" Kanaka would stalk in with a woman's bonnet on, wrong side
+ before&mdash;only this, and nothing more; after him would stride his
+ fellow, with the legs of a pair of pantaloons tied around his neck, the
+ rest of his person untrammeled; in his rear would come another gentleman
+ simply gotten up in a fiery neck-tie and a striped vest.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link485" id="link485"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="485.jpg (90K)" src="images/485.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The poor creatures were beaming with complacency and wholly unconscious of
+ any absurdity in their appearance. They gazed at each other with happy
+ admiration, and it was plain to see that the young girls were taking note
+ of what each other had on, as naturally as if they had always lived in a
+ land of Bibles and knew what churches were made for; here was the evidence
+ of a dawning civilization. The spectacle which the congregation presented
+ was so extraordinary and withal so moving, that the missionaries found it
+ difficult to keep to the text and go on with the services; and by and by
+ when the simple children of the sun began a general swapping of garments
+ in open meeting and produced some irresistibly grotesque effects in the
+ course of re-dressing, there was nothing for it but to cut the thing short
+ with the benediction and dismiss the fantastic assemblage.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In our country, children play "keep house;" and in the same high-sounding
+ but miniature way the grown folk here, with the poor little material of
+ slender territory and meagre population, play "empire." There is his royal
+ Majesty the King, with a New York detective's income of thirty or
+ thirty-five thousand dollars a year from the "royal civil list" and the
+ "royal domain." He lives in a two-story frame "palace."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link486" id="link486"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="486.jpg (35K)" src="images/486.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And there is the "royal family"&mdash;the customary hive of royal
+ brothers, sisters, cousins and other noble drones and vagrants usual to
+ monarchy,&mdash;all with a spoon in the national pap-dish, and all bearing
+ such titles as his or her Royal Highness the Prince or Princess So-and-so.
+ Few of them can carry their royal splendors far enough to ride in
+ carriages, however; they sport the economical Kanaka horse or "hoof it"
+ with the plebeians.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then there is his Excellency the "royal Chamberlain"&mdash;a sinecure, for
+ his majesty dresses himself with his own hands, except when he is
+ ruralizing at Waikiki and then he requires no dressing.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next we have his Excellency the Commander-in-chief of the Household
+ Troops, whose forces consist of about the number of soldiers usually
+ placed under a corporal in other lands.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next comes the royal Steward and the Grand Equerry in Waiting&mdash;high
+ dignitaries with modest salaries and little to do.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then we have his Excellency the First Gentleman of the Bed-chamber&mdash;an
+ office as easy as it is magnificent.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next we come to his Excellency the Prime Minister, a renegade American
+ from New Hampshire, all jaw, vanity, bombast and ignorance, a lawyer of
+ "shyster" calibre, a fraud by nature, a humble worshipper of the sceptre
+ above him, a reptile never tired of sneering at the land of his birth or
+ glorifying the ten-acre kingdom that has adopted him&mdash;salary, $4,000
+ a year, vast consequence, and no perquisites.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then we have his Excellency the Imperial Minister of Finance, who handles
+ a million dollars of public money a year, sends in his annual "budget"
+ with great ceremony, talks prodigiously of "finance," suggests imposing
+ schemes for paying off the "national debt" (of $150,000,) and does it all
+ for $4,000 a year and unimaginable glory.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next we have his Excellency the Minister of War, who holds sway over the
+ royal armies&mdash;they consist of two hundred and thirty uniformed
+ Kanakas, mostly Brigadier Generals, and if the country ever gets into
+ trouble with a foreign power we shall probably hear from them. I knew an
+ American whose copper-plate visiting card bore this impressive legend:
+ "Lieutenant-Colonel in the Royal Infantry." To say that he was proud of
+ this distinction is stating it but tamely. The Minister of War has also in
+ his charge some venerable swivels on Punch-Bowl Hill wherewith royal
+ salutes are fired when foreign vessels of war enter the port.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next comes his Excellency the Minister of the Navy&mdash;a nabob who rules
+ the "royal fleet," (a steam-tug and a sixty-ton schooner.)
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And next comes his Grace the Lord Bishop of Honolulu, the chief dignitary
+ of the "Established Church"&mdash;for when the American Presbyterian
+ missionaries had completed the reduction of the nation to a compact
+ condition of Christianity, native royalty stepped in and erected the grand
+ dignity of an "Established (Episcopal) Church" over it, and imported a
+ cheap ready-made Bishop from England to take charge. The chagrin of the
+ missionaries has never been comprehensively expressed, to this day,
+ profanity not being admissible.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next comes his Excellency the Minister of Public Instruction.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Next, their Excellencies the Governors of Oahu, Hawaii, etc., and after
+ them a string of High Sheriffs and other small fry too numerous for
+ computation.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then there are their Excellencies the Envoy Extraordinary and Minister
+ Plenipotentiary of his Imperial Majesty the Emperor of the French; her
+ British Majesty's Minister; the Minister Resident, of the United States;
+ and some six or eight representatives of other foreign nations, all with
+ sounding titles, imposing dignity and prodigious but economical state.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link488" id="link488"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="488.jpg (94K)" src="images/488.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Imagine all this grandeur in a play-house "kingdom" whose population falls
+ absolutely short of sixty thousand souls!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The people are so accustomed to nine-jointed titles and colossal magnates
+ that a foreign prince makes very little more stir in Honolulu than a
+ Western Congressman does in New York.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And let it be borne in mind that there is a strictly defined "court
+ costume" of so "stunning" a nature that it would make the clown in a
+ circus look tame and commonplace by comparison; and each Hawaiian official
+ dignitary has a gorgeous vari-colored, gold-laced uniform peculiar to his
+ office&mdash;no two of them are alike, and it is hard to tell which one is
+ the "loudest." The King had a "drawing-room" at stated intervals, like
+ other monarchs, and when these varied uniforms congregate there&mdash;weak-eyed
+ people have to contemplate the spectacle through smoked glass. Is there
+ not a gratifying contrast between this latter-day exhibition and the one
+ the ancestors of some of these magnates afforded the missionaries the
+ Sunday after the old-time distribution of clothing? Behold what religion
+ and civilization have wrought!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link489" id="link489"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="489.jpg (40K)" src="images/489.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch68" id="linkch68"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXVIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ While I was in Honolulu I witnessed the ceremonious funeral of the King's
+ sister, her Royal Highness the Princess Victoria. According to the royal
+ custom, the remains had lain in state at the palace thirty days, watched
+ day and night by a guard of honor. And during all that time a great
+ multitude of natives from the several islands had kept the palace grounds
+ well crowded and had made the place a pandemonium every night with their
+ howlings and wailings, beating of tom-toms and dancing of the (at other
+ times) forbidden "hula-hula" by half-clad maidens to the music of songs of
+ questionable decency chanted in honor of the deceased. The printed
+ programme of the funeral procession interested me at the time; and after
+ what I have just said of Hawaiian grandiloquence in the matter of "playing
+ empire," I am persuaded that a perusal of it may interest the reader:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After reading the long list of dignitaries, etc., and remembering the
+ sparseness of the population, one is almost inclined to wonder where the
+ material for that portion of the procession devoted to "Hawaiian
+ Population Generally" is going to be procured:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link490" id="link490"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="490.jpg (34K)" src="images/490.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="491.jpg (105K)" src="images/491.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Undertaker. Royal School. Kawaiahao School. Roman Catholic School. Maemae
+ School. Honolulu Fire Department. Mechanics' Benefit Union. Attending
+ Physicians. Knonohikis (Superintendents) of the Crown Lands, Konohikis of
+ the Private Lands of His Majesty Konohikis of the Private Lands of Her
+ late Royal Highness. Governor of Oahu and Staff. Hulumanu (Military
+ Company). Household Troops. The Prince of Hawaii's Own (Military Company).
+ The King's household servants. Servants of Her late Royal Highness.
+ Protestant Clergy. The Clergy of the Roman Catholic Church. His Lordship
+ Louis Maigret, The Right Rev. Bishop of Arathea, Vicar- Apostolic of the
+ Hawaiian Islands. The Clergy of the Hawaiian Reformed Catholic Church. His
+ Lordship the Right Rev. Bishop of Honolulu. Her Majesty Queen Emma's
+ Carriage. His Majesty's Staff. Carriage of Her late Royal Highness.
+ Carriage of Her Majesty the Queen Dowager. The King's Chancellor. Cabinet
+ Ministers. His Excellency the Minister Resident of the United States. H.
+ B. M's Commissioner. H. B. M's Acting Commissioner. Judges of Supreme
+ Court. Privy Councillors. Members of Legislative Assembly. Consular Corps.
+ Circuit Judges. Clerks of Government Departments. Members of the Bar.
+ Collector General, Custom-house Officers and Officers of the Customs.
+ Marshal and Sheriffs of the different Islands. King's Yeomanry. Foreign
+ Residents. Ahahui Kaahumanu. Hawaiian Population Generally. Hawaiian
+ Cavalry. Police Force.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I resume my journal at the point where the procession arrived at the royal
+ mausoleum:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ As the procession filed through the gate, the military deployed
+ handsomely to the right and left and formed an avenue through which the
+ long column of mourners passed to the tomb. The coffin was borne through
+ the door of the mausoleum, followed by the King and his chiefs, the
+ great officers of the kingdom, foreign Consuls, Embassadors and
+ distinguished guests (Burlingame and General Van Valkenburgh). Several
+ of the kahilis were then fastened to a frame- work in front of the tomb,
+ there to remain until they decay and fall to pieces, or, forestalling
+ this, until another scion of royalty dies. At this point of the
+ proceedings the multitude set up such a heart-broken wailing as I hope
+ never to hear again.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link492" id="link492"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="492.jpg (90K)" src="images/492.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The soldiers fired three volleys of musketry&mdash;the wailing being
+ previously silenced to permit of the guns being heard. His Highness
+ Prince William, in a showy military uniform (the "true prince," this&mdash;scion
+ of the house over-thrown by the present dynasty&mdash;he was formerly
+ betrothed to the Princess but was not allowed to marry her), stood guard
+ and paced back and forth within the door. The privileged few who
+ followed the coffin into the mausoleum remained sometime, but the King
+ soon came out and stood in the door and near one side of it. A stranger
+ could have guessed his rank (although he was so simply and
+ unpretentiously dressed) by the profound deference paid him by all
+ persons in his vicinity; by seeing his high officers receive his quiet
+ orders and suggestions with bowed and uncovered heads; and by observing
+ how careful those persons who came out of the mausoleum were to avoid
+ "crowding" him (although there was room enough in the doorway for a
+ wagon to pass, for that matter); how respectfully they edged out
+ sideways, scraping their backs against the wall and always presenting a
+ front view of their persons to his Majesty, and never putting their hats
+ on until they were well out of the royal presence.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He was dressed entirely in black&mdash;dress-coat and silk hat&mdash;and
+ looked rather democratic in the midst of the showy uniforms about him.
+ On his breast he wore a large gold star, which was half hidden by the
+ lapel of his coat. He remained at the door a half hour, and occasionally
+ gave an order to the men who were erecting the kahilis [Ranks of
+ long-handled mops made of gaudy feathers&mdash;sacred to royalty. They
+ are stuck in the ground around the tomb and left there.] before the
+ tomb. He had the good taste to make one of them substitute black crape
+ for the ordinary hempen rope he was about to tie one of them to the
+ frame-work with. Finally he entered his carriage and drove away, and the
+ populace shortly began to drop into his wake. While he was in view there
+ was but one man who attracted more attention than himself, and that was
+ Harris (the Yankee Prime Minister). This feeble personage had crape
+ enough around his hat to express the grief of an entire nation, and as
+ usual he neglected no opportunity of making himself conspicuous and
+ exciting the admiration of the simple Kanakas. Oh! noble ambition of
+ this modern Richelieu!
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ It is interesting to contrast the funeral ceremonies of the Princess
+ Victoria with those of her noted ancestor Kamehameha the Conqueror, who
+ died fifty years ago&mdash;in 1819, the year before the first missionaries
+ came.
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "On the 8th of May, 1819, at the age of sixty-six, he died, as he had
+ lived, in the faith of his country. It was his misfortune not to have
+ come in contact with men who could have rightly influenced his religious
+ aspirations. Judged by his advantages and compared with the most eminent
+ of his countrymen he may be justly styled not only great, but good. To
+ this day his memory warms the heart and elevates the national feelings
+ of Hawaiians. They are proud of their old warrior King; they love his
+ name; his deeds form their historical age; and an enthusiasm everywhere
+ prevails, shared even by foreigners who knew his worth, that constitutes
+ the firmest pillar of the throne of his dynasty.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "In lieu of human victims (the custom of that age), a sacrifice of three
+ hundred dogs attended his obsequies&mdash;no mean holocaust when their
+ national value and the estimation in which they were held are
+ considered. The bones of Kamehameha, after being kept for a while, were
+ so carefully concealed that all knowledge of their final resting place
+ is now lost. There was a proverb current among the common people that
+ the bones of a cruel King could not be hid; they made fish-hooks and
+ arrows of them, upon which, in using them, they vented their abhorrence
+ of his memory in bitter execrations."
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ The account of the circumstances of his death, as written by the native
+ historians, is full of minute detail, but there is scarcely a line of it
+ which does not mention or illustrate some by-gone custom of the country.
+ In this respect it is the most comprehensive document I have yet met with.
+ I will quote it entire:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "When Kamehameha was dangerously sick, and the priests were unable to
+ cure him, they said: 'Be of good courage and build a house for the god'
+ (his own private god or idol), that thou mayest recover.' The chiefs
+ corroborated this advice of the priests, and a place of worship was
+ prepared for Kukailimoku, and consecrated in the evening. They proposed
+ also to the King, with a view to prolong his life, that human victims
+ should be sacrificed to his deity; upon which the greater part of the
+ people absconded through fear of death, and concealed themselves in
+ hiding places till the tabu [Tabu (pronounced tah-boo,) means
+ prohibition (we have borrowed it,) or sacred. The tabu was sometimes
+ permanent, sometimes temporary; and the person or thing placed under
+ tabu was for the time being sacred to the purpose for which it was set
+ apart. In the above case the victims selected under the tabu would be
+ sacred to the sacrifice] in which destruction impended, was past. It is
+ doubtful whether Kamehameha approved of the plan of the chiefs and
+ priests to sacrifice men, as he was known to say, 'The men are sacred
+ for the King;' meaning that they were for the service of his successor.
+ This information was derived from Liholiho, his son.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "After this, his sickness increased to such a degree that he had not
+ strength to turn himself in his bed. When another season, consecrated
+ for worship at the new temple (heiau) arrived, he said to his son,
+ Liholiho, 'Go thou and make supplication to thy god; I am not able to
+ go, and will offer my prayers at home.' When his devotions to his
+ feathered god, Kukailimoku, were concluded, a certain religiously
+ disposed individual, who had a bird god, suggested to the King that
+ through its influence his sickness might be removed. The name of this
+ god was Pua; its body was made of a bird, now eaten by the Hawaiians,
+ and called in their language alae. Kamehameha was willing that a trial
+ should be made, and two houses were constructed to facilitate the
+ experiment; but while dwelling in them he became so very weak as not to
+ receive food. After lying there three days, his wives, children and
+ chiefs, perceiving that he was very low, returned him to his own house.
+ In the evening he was carried to the eating house, where he took a
+ little food in his mouth which he did not swallow; also a cup of water.
+ The chiefs requested him to give them his counsel; but he made no reply,
+ and was carried back to the dwelling house; but when near midnight&mdash;ten
+ o'clock, perhaps&mdash;he was carried again to the place to eat; but, as
+ before, he merely tasted of what was presented to him. Then Kaikioewa
+ addressed him thus: 'Here we all are, your younger brethren, your son
+ Liholiho and your foreigner; impart to us your dying charge, that
+ Liholiho and Kaahumanu may hear.' Then Kamehameha inquired, 'What do you
+ say?' Kaikioewa repeated, 'Your counsels for us.'
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "He then said, 'Move on in my good way and&mdash;.' He could proceed no
+ further. The foreigner, Mr. Young, embraced and kissed him. Hoapili also
+ embraced him, whispering something in his ear, after which he was taken
+ back to the house. About twelve he was carried once more to the house
+ for eating, into which his head entered, while his body was in the
+ dwelling house immediately adjoining. It should be remarked that this
+ frequent carrying of a sick chief from one house to another resulted
+ from the tabu system, then in force. There were at that time six houses
+ (huts) connected with an establishment&mdash;one was for worship, one
+ for the men to eat in, an eating house for the women, a house to sleep
+ in, a house in which to manufacture kapa (native cloth) and one where,
+ at certain intervals, the women might dwell in seclusion.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "The sick was once more taken to his house, when he expired; this was at
+ two o'clock, a circumstance from which Leleiohoku derived his name. As
+ he breathed his last, Kalaimoku came to the eating house to order those
+ in it to go out. There were two aged persons thus directed to depart;
+ one went, the other remained on account of love to the King, by whom he
+ had formerly been kindly sustained. The children also were sent away.
+ Then Kalaimoku came to the house, and the chiefs had a consultation. One
+ of them spoke thus: 'This is my thought&mdash;we will eat him raw. [This
+ sounds suspicious, in view of the fact that all Sandwich Island
+ historians, white and black, protest that cannibalism never existed in
+ the islands. However, since they only proposed to "eat him raw" we
+ "won't count that". But it would certainly have been cannibalism if they
+ had cooked him.&mdash;M. T.] Kaahumanu (one of the dead King's widows)
+ replied, 'Perhaps his body is not at our disposal; that is more properly
+ with his successor. Our part in him&mdash;his breath&mdash;has departed;
+ his remains will be disposed of by Liholiho.'
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "After this conversation the body was taken into the consecrated house
+ for the performance of the proper rites by the priest and the new King.
+ The name of this ceremony is uko; and when the sacred hog was baked the
+ priest offered it to the dead body, and it became a god, the King at the
+ same time repeating the customary prayers.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Then the priest, addressing himself to the King and chiefs, said: 'I
+ will now make known to you the rules to be observed respecting persons
+ to be sacrificed on the burial of this body. If you obtain one man
+ before the corpse is removed, one will be sufficient; but after it
+ leaves this house four will be required. If delayed until we carry the
+ corpse to the grave there must be ten; but after it is deposited in the
+ grave there must be fifteen. To-morrow morning there will be a tabu,
+ and, if the sacrifice be delayed until that time, forty men must die.'
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Then the high priest, Hewahewa, inquired of the chiefs, 'Where shall be
+ the residence of King Liholiho?' They replied, 'Where, indeed? You, of
+ all men, ought to know.' Then the priest observed, 'There are two
+ suitable places; one is Kau, the other is Kohala.' The chiefs preferred
+ the latter, as it was more thickly inhabited. The priest added, 'These
+ are proper places for the King's residence; but he must not remain in
+ Kona, for it is polluted.' This was agreed to. It was now break of day.
+ As he was being carried to the place of burial the people perceived that
+ their King was dead, and they wailed. When the corpse was removed from
+ the house to the tomb, a distance of one chain, the procession was met
+ by a certain man who was ardently attached to the deceased. He leaped
+ upon the chiefs who were carrying the King's body; he desired to die
+ with him on account of his love. The chiefs drove him away. He persisted
+ in making numerous attempts, which were unavailing. Kalaimoka also had
+ it in his heart to die with him, but was prevented by Hookio.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "The morning following Kamehameha's death, Liholiho and his train
+ departed for Kohala, according to the suggestions of the priest, to
+ avoid the defilement occasioned by the dead. At this time if a chief
+ died the land was polluted, and the heirs sought a residence in another
+ part of the country until the corpse was dissected and the bones tied in
+ a bundle, which being done, the season of defilement terminated. If the
+ deceased were not a chief, the house only was defiled which became pure
+ again on the burial of the body. Such were the laws on this subject.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "On the morning on which Liholiho sailed in his canoe for Kohala, the
+ chiefs and people mourned after their manner on occasion of a chief's
+ death, conducting themselves like madmen and like beasts. Their conduct
+ was such as to forbid description; The priests, also, put into action
+ the sorcery apparatus, that the person who had prayed the King to death
+ might die; for it was not believed that Kamehameha's departure was the
+ effect either of sickness or old age. When the sorcerers set up by their
+ fire-places sticks with a strip of kapa flying at the top, the chief
+ Keeaumoku, Kaahumaun's brother, came in a state of intoxication and
+ broke the flag-staff of the sorcerers, from which it was inferred that
+ Kaahumanu and her friends had been instrumental in the King's death. On
+ this account they were subjected to abuse."
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ You have the contrast, now, and a strange one it is. This great Queen,
+ Kaahumanu, who was "subjected to abuse" during the frightful orgies that
+ followed the King's death, in accordance with ancient custom, afterward
+ became a devout Christian and a steadfast and powerful friend of the
+ missionaries.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Dogs were, and still are, reared and fattened for food, by the natives&mdash;hence
+ the reference to their value in one of the above paragraphs.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Forty years ago it was the custom in the Islands to suspend all law for a
+ certain number of days after the death of a royal personage; and then a
+ saturnalia ensued which one may picture to himself after a fashion, but
+ not in the full horror of the reality. The people shaved their heads,
+ knocked out a tooth or two, plucked out an eye sometimes, cut, bruised,
+ mutilated or burned their flesh, got drunk, burned each other's huts,
+ maimed or murdered one another according to the caprice of the moment, and
+ both sexes gave themselves up to brutal and unbridled licentiousness.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link497" id="link497"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="497.jpg (96K)" src="images/497.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And after it all, came a torpor from which the nation slowly emerged
+ bewildered and dazed, as if from a hideous half-remembered nightmare. They
+ were not the salt of the earth, those "gentle children of the sun."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The natives still keep up an old custom of theirs which cannot be
+ comforting to an invalid. When they think a sick friend is going to die, a
+ couple of dozen neighbors surround his hut and keep up a deafening wailing
+ night and day till he either dies or gets well. No doubt this arrangement
+ has helped many a subject to a shroud before his appointed time.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ They surround a hut and wail in the same heart-broken way when its
+ occupant returns from a journey. This is their dismal idea of a welcome. A
+ very little of it would go a great way with most of us.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch69" id="linkch69"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXIX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Bound for Hawaii (a hundred and fifty miles distant,) to visit the great
+ volcano and behold the other notable things which distinguish that island
+ above the remainder of the group, we sailed from Honolulu on a certain
+ Saturday afternoon, in the good schooner Boomerang.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The Boomerang was about as long as two street cars, and about as wide as
+ one. She was so small (though she was larger than the majority of the
+ inter-island coasters) that when I stood on her deck I felt but little
+ smaller than the Colossus of Rhodes must have felt when he had a man-of-
+ war under him. I could reach the water when she lay over under a strong
+ breeze. When the Captain and my comrade (a Mr. Billings), myself and four
+ other persons were all assembled on the little after portion of the deck
+ which is sacred to the cabin passengers, it was full&mdash;there was not
+ room for any more quality folks. Another section of the deck, twice as
+ large as ours, was full of natives of both sexes, with their customary
+ dogs, mats, blankets, pipes, calabashes of poi, fleas, and other luxuries
+ and baggage of minor importance. As soon as we set sail the natives all
+ lay down on the deck as thick as negroes in a slave-pen, and smoked,
+ conversed, and spit on each other, and were truly sociable.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The little low-ceiled cabin below was rather larger than a hearse, and as
+ dark as a vault. It had two coffins on each side&mdash;I mean two bunks. A
+ small table, capable of accommodating three persons at dinner, stood
+ against the forward bulkhead, and over it hung the dingiest whale oil
+ lantern that ever peopled the obscurity of a dungeon with ghostly shapes.
+ The floor room unoccupied was not extensive. One might swing a cat in it,
+ perhaps, but not a long cat. The hold forward of the bulkhead had but
+ little freight in it, and from morning till night a portly old rooster,
+ with a voice like Baalam's ass, and the same disposition to use it,
+ strutted up and down in that part of the vessel and crowed. He usually
+ took dinner at six o'clock, and then, after an hour devoted to meditation,
+ he mounted a barrel and crowed a good part of the night. He got hoarser
+ all the time, but he scorned to allow any personal consideration to
+ interfere with his duty, and kept up his labors in defiance of threatened
+ diphtheria.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link499" id="link499"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="499.jpg (19K)" src="images/499.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Sleeping was out of the question when he was on watch. He was a source of
+ genuine aggravation and annoyance. It was worse than useless to shout at
+ him or apply offensive epithets to him&mdash;he only took these things for
+ applause, and strained himself to make more noise. Occasionally, during
+ the day, I threw potatoes at him through an aperture in the bulkhead, but
+ he only dodged and went on crowing.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The first night, as I lay in my coffin, idly watching the dim lamp
+ swinging to the rolling of the ship, and snuffing the nauseous odors of
+ bilge water, I felt something gallop over me. I turned out promptly.
+ However, I turned in again when I found it was only a rat. Presently
+ something galloped over me once more. I knew it was not a rat this time,
+ and I thought it might be a centipede, because the Captain had killed one
+ on deck in the afternoon. I turned out. The first glance at the pillow
+ showed me repulsive sentinel perched upon each end of it&mdash;cockroaches
+ as large as peach leaves&mdash;fellows with long, quivering antennae and
+ fiery, malignant eyes. They were grating their teeth like tobacco worms,
+ and appeared to be dissatisfied about something. I had often heard that
+ these reptiles were in the habit of eating off sleeping sailors' toe nails
+ down to the quick, and I would not get in the bunk any more. I lay down on
+ the floor. But a rat came and bothered me, and shortly afterward a
+ procession of cockroaches arrived and camped in my hair. In a few moments
+ the rooster was crowing with uncommon spirit and a party of fleas were
+ throwing double somersaults about my person in the wildest disorder, and
+ taking a bite every time they struck. I was beginning to feel really
+ annoyed. I got up and put my clothes on and went on deck.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The above is not overdrawn; it is a truthful sketch of inter-island
+ schooner life. There is no such thing as keeping a vessel in elegant
+ condition, when she carries molasses and Kanakas.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was compensation for my sufferings to come unexpectedly upon so
+ beautiful a scene as met my eye&mdash;to step suddenly out of the
+ sepulchral gloom of the cabin and stand under the strong light of the moon&mdash;in
+ the centre, as it were, of a glittering sea of liquid silver&mdash;to see
+ the broad sails straining in the gale, the ship heeled over on her side,
+ the angry foam hissing past her lee bulwarks, and sparkling sheets of
+ spray dashing high over her bows and raining upon her decks; to brace
+ myself and hang fast to the first object that presented itself, with hat
+ jammed down and coat tails whipping in the breeze, and feel that
+ exhilaration that thrills in one's hair and quivers down his back bone
+ when he knows that every inch of canvas is drawing and the vessel cleaving
+ through the waves at her utmost speed. There was no darkness, no dimness,
+ no obscurity there. All was brightness, every object was vividly defined.
+ Every prostrate Kanaka; every coil of rope; every calabash of poi; every
+ puppy; every seam in the flooring; every bolthead; every object; however
+ minute, showed sharp and distinct in its every outline; and the shadow of
+ the broad mainsail lay black as a pall upon the deck, leaving Billings's
+ white upturned face glorified and his body in a total eclipse.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link501" id="link501"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="501.jpg (93K)" src="images/501.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Monday morning we were close to the island of Hawaii. Two of its high
+ mountains were in view&mdash;Mauna Loa and Hualaiai. The latter is an
+ imposing peak, but being only ten thousand feet high is seldom mentioned
+ or heard of. Mauna Loa is said to be sixteen thousand feet high. The rays
+ of glittering snow and ice, that clasped its summit like a claw, looked
+ refreshing when viewed from the blistering climate we were in. One could
+ stand on that mountain (wrapped up in blankets and furs to keep warm), and
+ while he nibbled a snowball or an icicle to quench his thirst he could
+ look down the long sweep of its sides and see spots where plants are
+ growing that grow only where the bitter cold of Winter prevails; lower
+ down he could see sections devoted to production that thrive in the
+ temperate zone alone; and at the bottom of the mountain he could see the
+ home of the tufted cocoa-palms and other species of vegetation that grow
+ only in the sultry atmosphere of eternal Summer. He could see all the
+ climes of the world at a single glance of the eye, and that glance would
+ only pass over a distance of four or five miles as the bird flies!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link502" id="link502"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="502.jpg (162K)" src="images/502.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By and by we took boat and went ashore at Kailua, designing to ride
+ horseback through the pleasant orange and coffee region of Kona, and
+ rejoin the vessel at a point some leagues distant. This journey is well
+ worth taking. The trail passes along on high ground&mdash;say a thousand
+ feet above sea level&mdash;and usually about a mile distant from the
+ ocean, which is always in sight, save that occasionally you find yourself
+ buried in the forest in the midst of a rank tropical vegetation and a
+ dense growth of trees, whose great bows overarch the road and shut out sun
+ and sea and everything, and leave you in a dim, shady tunnel, haunted with
+ invisible singing birds and fragrant with the odor of flowers. It was
+ pleasant to ride occasionally in the warm sun, and feast the eye upon the
+ ever- changing panorama of the forest (beyond and below us), with its many
+ tints, its softened lights and shadows, its billowy undulations sweeping
+ gently down from the mountain to the sea. It was pleasant also, at
+ intervals, to leave the sultry sun and pass into the cool, green depths of
+ this forest and indulge in sentimental reflections under the inspiration
+ of its brooding twilight and its whispering foliage. We rode through one
+ orange grove that had ten thousand tree in it! They were all laden with
+ fruit.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At one farmhouse we got some large peaches of excellent flavor. This
+ fruit, as a general thing, does not do well in the Sandwich Islands. It
+ takes a sort of almond shape, and is small and bitter. It needs frost,
+ they say, and perhaps it does; if this be so, it will have a good
+ opportunity to go on needing it, as it will not be likely to get it. The
+ trees from which the fine fruit I have spoken of, came, had been planted
+ and replanted sixteen times, and to this treatment the proprietor of the
+ orchard attributed his-success.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We passed several sugar plantations&mdash;new ones and not very extensive.
+ The crops were, in most cases, third rattoons. [NOTE.&mdash;The first crop
+ is called "plant cane;" subsequent crops which spring from the original
+ roots, without replanting, are called "rattoons."] Almost everywhere on
+ the island of Hawaii sugar-cane matures in twelve months, both rattoons
+ and plant, and although it ought to be taken off as soon as it tassels, no
+ doubt, it is not absolutely necessary to do it until about four months
+ afterward. In Kona, the average yield of an acre of ground is two tons of
+ sugar, they say. This is only a moderate yield for these islands, but
+ would be astounding for Louisiana and most other sugar growing countries.
+ The plantations in Kona being on pretty high ground&mdash;up among the
+ light and frequent rains&mdash;no irrigation whatever is required.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link503" id="link503"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="503.jpg (55K)" src="images/503.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch70" id="linkch70"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We stopped some time at one of the plantations, to rest ourselves and
+ refresh the horses. We had a chatty conversation with several gentlemen
+ present; but there was one person, a middle aged man, with an absent look
+ in his face, who simply glanced up, gave us good-day and lapsed again into
+ the meditations which our coming had interrupted. The planters whispered
+ us not to mind him&mdash;crazy. They said he was in the Islands for his
+ health; was a preacher; his home, Michigan. They said that if he woke up
+ presently and fell to talking about a correspondence which he had some
+ time held with Mr. Greeley about a trifle of some kind, we must humor him
+ and listen with interest; and we must humor his fancy that this
+ correspondence was the talk of the world.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link505" id="link505"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="505.jpg (46K)" src="images/505.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was easy to see that he was a gentle creature and that his madness had
+ nothing vicious in it. He looked pale, and a little worn, as if with
+ perplexing thought and anxiety of mind. He sat a long time, looking at the
+ floor, and at intervals muttering to himself and nodding his head
+ acquiescingly or shaking it in mild protest. He was lost in his thought,
+ or in his memories. We continued our talk with the planters, branching
+ from subject to subject. But at last the word "circumstance," casually
+ dropped, in the course of conversation, attracted his attention and
+ brought an eager look into his countenance. He faced about in his chair
+ and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Circumstance? What circumstance? Ah, I know&mdash;I know too well. So you
+ have heard of it too." [With a sigh.] "Well, no matter&mdash;all the world
+ has heard of it. All the world. The whole world. It is a large world, too,
+ for a thing to travel so far in&mdash;now isn't it? Yes, yes&mdash;the
+ Greeley correspondence with Erickson has created the saddest and bitterest
+ controversy on both sides of the ocean&mdash;and still they keep it up! It
+ makes us famous, but at what a sorrowful sacrifice! I was so sorry when I
+ heard that it had caused that bloody and distressful war over there in
+ Italy. It was little comfort to me, after so much bloodshed, to know that
+ the victors sided with me, and the vanquished with Greeley.&mdash;It is
+ little comfort to know that Horace Greeley is responsible for the battle
+ of Sadowa, and not me.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Queen Victoria wrote me that she felt just as I did about it&mdash;she
+ said that as much as she was opposed to Greeley and the spirit he showed
+ in the correspondence with me, she would not have had Sadowa happen for
+ hundreds of dollars. I can show you her letter, if you would like to see
+ it. But gentlemen, much as you may think you know about that unhappy
+ correspondence, you cannot know the straight of it till you hear it from
+ my lips. It has always been garbled in the journals, and even in history.
+ Yes, even in history&mdash;think of it! Let me&mdash;please let me, give
+ you the matter, exactly as it occurred. I truly will not abuse your
+ confidence."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then he leaned forward, all interest, all earnestness, and told his story&mdash;and
+ told it appealingly, too, and yet in the simplest and most unpretentious
+ way; indeed, in such a way as to suggest to one, all the time, that this
+ was a faithful, honorable witness, giving evidence in the sacred interest
+ of justice, and under oath. He said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Mrs. Beazeley&mdash;Mrs. Jackson Beazeley, widow, of the village of
+ Campbellton, Kansas,&mdash;wrote me about a matter which was near her
+ heart&mdash;a matter which many might think trivial, but to her it was a
+ thing of deep concern. I was living in Michigan, then&mdash;serving in the
+ ministry. She was, and is, an estimable woman&mdash;a woman to whom
+ poverty and hardship have proven incentives to industry, in place of
+ discouragements. Her only treasure was her son William, a youth just
+ verging upon manhood; religious, amiable, and sincerely attached to
+ agriculture. He was the widow's comfort and her pride. And so, moved by
+ her love for him, she wrote me about a matter, as I have said before,
+ which lay near her heart&mdash;because it lay near her boy's. She desired
+ me to confer with Mr. Greeley about turnips. Turnips were the dream of her
+ child's young ambition. While other youths were frittering away in
+ frivolous amusements the precious years of budding vigor which God had
+ given them for useful preparation, this boy was patiently enriching his
+ mind with information concerning turnips. The sentiment which he felt
+ toward the turnip was akin to adoration. He could not think of the turnip
+ without emotion; he could not speak of it calmly; he could not contemplate
+ it without exaltation. He could not eat it without shedding tears. All the
+ poetry in his sensitive nature was in sympathy with the gracious
+ vegetable. With the earliest pipe of dawn he sought his patch, and when
+ the curtaining night drove him from it he shut himself up with his books
+ and garnered statistics till sleep overcame him. On rainy days he sat and
+ talked hours together with his mother about turnips. When company came, he
+ made it his loving duty to put aside everything else and converse with
+ them all the day long of his great joy in the turnip.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link507" id="link507"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="507.jpg (67K)" src="images/507.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "And yet, was this joy rounded and complete? Was there no secret alloy of
+ unhappiness in it? Alas, there was. There was a canker gnawing at his
+ heart; the noblest inspiration of his soul eluded his endeavor&mdash;viz:
+ he could not make of the turnip a climbing vine. Months went by; the bloom
+ forsook his cheek, the fire faded out of his eye; sighings and abstraction
+ usurped the place of smiles and cheerful converse. But a watchful eye
+ noted these things and in time a motherly sympathy unsealed the secret.
+ Hence the letter to me. She pleaded for attention&mdash;she said her boy
+ was dying by inches.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I was a stranger to Mr. Greeley, but what of that? The matter was urgent.
+ I wrote and begged him to solve the difficult problem if possible and save
+ the student's life. My interest grew, until it partook of the anxiety of
+ the mother. I waited in much suspense.&mdash;At last the answer came.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link509" id="link509"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="509.jpg (127K)" src="images/509.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I found that I could not read it readily, the handwriting being
+ unfamiliar and my emotions somewhat wrought up. It seemed to refer in part
+ to the boy's case, but chiefly to other and irrelevant matters&mdash;such
+ as paving-stones, electricity, oysters, and something which I took to be
+ 'absolution' or 'agrarianism,' I could not be certain which; still, these
+ appeared to be simply casual mentions, nothing more; friendly in spirit,
+ without doubt, but lacking the connection or coherence necessary to make
+ them useful.&mdash;I judged that my understanding was affected by my
+ feelings, and so laid the letter away till morning.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "In the morning I read it again, but with difficulty and uncertainty
+ still, for I had lost some little rest and my mental vision seemed
+ clouded. The note was more connected, now, but did not meet the emergency
+ it was expected to meet. It was too discursive. It appeared to read as
+ follows, though I was not certain of some of the words:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "Polygamy dissembles majesty; extracts redeem polarity; causes hitherto
+ exist. Ovations pursue wisdom, or warts inherit and condemn. Boston,
+ botany, cakes, folony undertakes, but who shall allay? We fear not.
+ Yrxwly, HEVACE EVEELOJ.'
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "But there did not seem to be a word about turnips. There seemed to be no
+ suggestion as to how they might be made to grow like vines. There was not
+ even a reference to the Beazeleys. I slept upon the matter; I ate no
+ supper, neither any breakfast next morning. So I resumed my work with a
+ brain refreshed, and was very hopeful. Now the letter took a different
+ aspect-all save the signature, which latter I judged to be only a harmless
+ affectation of Hebrew. The epistle was necessarily from Mr. Greeley, for
+ it bore the printed heading of The Tribune, and I had written to no one
+ else there. The letter, I say, had taken a different aspect, but still its
+ language was eccentric and avoided the issue. It now appeared to say:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "Bolivia extemporizes mackerel; borax esteems polygamy; sausages wither
+ in the east. Creation perdu, is done; for woes inherent one can damn.
+ Buttons, buttons, corks, geology underrates but we shall allay. My
+ beer's out. Yrxwly, HEVACE EVEELOJ.'
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "I was evidently overworked. My comprehension was impaired. Therefore I
+ gave two days to recreation, and then returned to my task greatly
+ refreshed. The letter now took this form:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "Poultices do sometimes choke swine; tulips reduce posterity; causes
+ leather to resist. Our notions empower wisdom, her let's afford while we
+ can. Butter but any cakes, fill any undertaker, we'll wean him from his
+ filly. We feel hot. Yrxwly, HEVACE EVEELOJ.'
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "I was still not satisfied. These generalities did not meet the question.
+ They were crisp, and vigorous, and delivered with a confidence that almost
+ compelled conviction; but at such a time as this, with a human life at
+ stake, they seemed inappropriate, worldly, and in bad taste. At any other
+ time I would have been not only glad, but proud, to receive from a man
+ like Mr. Greeley a letter of this kind, and would have studied it
+ earnestly and tried to improve myself all I could; but now, with that poor
+ boy in his far home languishing for relief, I had no heart for learning.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Three days passed by, and I read the note again. Again its tenor had
+ changed. It now appeared to say:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "Potations do sometimes wake wines; turnips restrain passion; causes
+ necessary to state. Infest the poor widow; her lord's effects will be
+ void. But dirt, bathing, etc., etc., followed unfairly, will worm him
+ from his folly&mdash;so swear not. Yrxwly, HEVACE EVEELOJ.'
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "This was more like it. But I was unable to proceed. I was too much worn.
+ The word 'turnips' brought temporary joy and encouragement, but my
+ strength was so much impaired, and the delay might be so perilous for the
+ boy, that I relinquished the idea of pursuing the translation further, and
+ resolved to do what I ought to have done at first. I sat down and wrote
+ Mr. Greeley as follows:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "DEAR SIR: I fear I do not entirely comprehend your kind note. It cannot
+ be possible, Sir, that 'turnips restrain passion'&mdash;at least the
+ study or contemplation of turnips cannot&mdash;for it is this very
+ employment that has scorched our poor friend's mind and sapped his
+ bodily strength.&mdash;But if they do restrain it, will you bear with us
+ a little further and explain how they should be prepared? I observe that
+ you say 'causes necessary to state,' but you have omitted to state them.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Under a misapprehension, you seem to attribute to me interested motives
+ in this matter&mdash;to call it by no harsher term. But I assure you,
+ dear sir, that if I seem to be 'infesting the widow,' it is all seeming,
+ and void of reality. It is from no seeking of mine that I am in this
+ position. She asked me, herself, to write you. I never have infested her&mdash;indeed
+ I scarcely know her. I do not infest anybody. I try to go along, in my
+ humble way, doing as near right as I can, never harming anybody, and
+ never throwing out insinuations. As for 'her lord and his effects,' they
+ are of no interest to me. I trust I have effects enough of my own&mdash;shall
+ endeavor to get along with them, at any rate, and not go mousing around
+ to get hold of somebody's that are 'void.' But do you not see?&mdash;this
+ woman is a widow&mdash;she has no 'lord.' He is dead&mdash;or pretended
+ to be, when they buried him. Therefore, no amount of 'dirt, bathing,'
+ etc., etc., howsoever 'unfairly followed' will be likely to 'worm him
+ from his folly'&mdash;if being dead and a ghost is 'folly.' Your closing
+ remark is as unkind as it was uncalled for; and if report says true you
+ might have applied it to yourself, sir, with more point and less
+ impropriety. Very Truly Yours, SIMON ERICKSON.
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "In the course of a few days, Mr. Greely did what would have saved a world
+ of trouble, and much mental and bodily suffering and misunderstanding, if
+ he had done it sooner. To wit, he sent an intelligible rescript or
+ translation of his original note, made in a plain hand by his clerk. Then
+ the mystery cleared, and I saw that his heart had been right, all the
+ time. I will recite the note in its clarified form:
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ [Translation.] 'Potatoes do sometimes make vines; turnips remain
+ passive: cause unnecessary to state. Inform the poor widow her lad's
+ efforts will be vain. But diet, bathing, etc. etc., followed uniformly,
+ will wean him from his folly&mdash;so fear not. Yours, HORACE GREELEY.'
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ "But alas, it was too late, gentlemen&mdash;too late. The criminal delay
+ had done its work&mdash;young Beazely was no more. His spirit had taken
+ its flight to a land where all anxieties shall be charmed away, all
+ desires gratified, all ambitions realized. Poor lad, they laid him to his
+ rest with a turnip in each hand."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So ended Erickson, and lapsed again into nodding, mumbling, and
+ abstraction. The company broke up, and left him so.... But they did not
+ say what drove him crazy. In the momentary confusion, I forgot to ask.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /> <br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> <a name="linkch71" id="linkch71"></a>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXXI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At four o'clock in the afternoon we were winding down a mountain of dreary
+ and desolate lava to the sea, and closing our pleasant land journey. This
+ lava is the accumulation of ages; one torrent of fire after another has
+ rolled down here in old times, and built up the island structure higher
+ and higher. Underneath, it is honey-combed with caves; it would be of no
+ use to dig wells in such a place; they would not hold water&mdash;you
+ would not find any for them to hold, for that matter. Consequently, the
+ planters depend upon cisterns.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The last lava flow occurred here so long ago that there are none now
+ living who witnessed it. In one place it enclosed and burned down a grove
+ of cocoa-nut trees, and the holes in the lava where the trunks stood are
+ still visible; their sides retain the impression of the bark; the trees
+ fell upon the burning river, and becoming partly submerged, left in it the
+ perfect counterpart of every knot and branch and leaf, and even nut, for
+ curiosity seekers of a long distant day to gaze upon and wonder at.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There were doubtless plenty of Kanaka sentinels on guard hereabouts at
+ that time, but they did not leave casts of their figures in the lava as
+ the Roman sentinels at Herculaneum and Pompeii did. It is a pity it is so,
+ because such things are so interesting; but so it is. They probably went
+ away. They went away early, perhaps. However, they had their merits; the
+ Romans exhibited the higher pluck, but the Kanakas showed the sounder
+ judgment.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Shortly we came in sight of that spot whose history is so familiar to
+ every school-boy in the wide world&mdash;Kealakekua Bay&mdash;the place
+ where Captain Cook, the great circumnavigator, was killed by the natives,
+ nearly a hundred years ago. The setting sun was flaming upon it, a Summer
+ shower was falling, and it was spanned by two magnificent rainbows. Two
+ men who were in advance of us rode through one of these and for a moment
+ their garments shone with a more than regal splendor. Why did not Captain
+ Cook have taste enough to call his great discovery the Rainbow Islands?
+ These charming spectacles are present to you at every turn; they are
+ common in all the islands; they are visible every day, and frequently at
+ night also&mdash;not the silvery bow we see once in an age in the States,
+ by moonlight, but barred with all bright and beautiful colors, like the
+ children of the sun and rain. I saw one of them a few nights ago. What the
+ sailors call "raindogs"&mdash;little patches of rainbow&mdash;are often
+ seen drifting about the heavens in these latitudes, like stained cathedral
+ windows.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Kealakekua Bay is a little curve like the last kink of a snail-shell,
+ winding deep into the land, seemingly not more than a mile wide from shore
+ to shore. It is bounded on one side&mdash;where the murder was done&mdash;by
+ a little flat plain, on which stands a cocoanut grove and some ruined
+ houses; a steep wall of lava, a thousand feet high at the upper end and
+ three or four hundred at the lower, comes down from the mountain and
+ bounds the inner extremity of it. From this wall the place takes its name,
+ Kealakekua, which in the native tongue signifies "The Pathway of the
+ Gods." They say, (and still believe, in spite of their liberal education
+ in Christianity), that the great god Lono, who used to live upon the
+ hillside, always traveled that causeway when urgent business connected
+ with heavenly affairs called him down to the seashore in a hurry.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ As the red sun looked across the placid ocean through the tall, clean
+ stems of the cocoanut trees, like a blooming whiskey bloat through the
+ bars of a city prison, I went and stood in the edge of the water on the
+ flat rock pressed by Captain Cook's feet when the blow was dealt which
+ took away his life, and tried to picture in my mind the doomed man
+ struggling in the midst of the multitude of exasperated savages&mdash;the
+ men in the ship crowding to the vessel's side and gazing in anxious dismay
+ toward the shore&mdash;the&mdash;but I discovered that I could not do it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link514" id="link514"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="514.jpg (93K)" src="images/514.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was growing dark, the rain began to fall, we could see that the distant
+ Boomerang was helplessly becalmed at sea, and so I adjourned to the
+ cheerless little box of a warehouse and sat down to smoke and think, and
+ wish the ship would make the land&mdash;for we had not eaten much for ten
+ hours and were viciously hungry.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Plain unvarnished history takes the romance out of Captain Cook's
+ assassination, and renders a deliberate verdict of justifiable homicide.
+ Wherever he went among the islands, he was cordially received and welcomed
+ by the inhabitants, and his ships lavishly supplied with all manner of
+ food. He returned these kindnesses with insult and ill- treatment.
+ Perceiving that the people took him for the long vanished and lamented god
+ Lono, he encouraged them in the delusion for the sake of the limitless
+ power it gave him; but during the famous disturbance at this spot, and
+ while he and his comrades were surrounded by fifteen thousand maddened
+ savages, he received a hurt and betrayed his earthly origin with a groan.
+ It was his death-warrant. Instantly a shout went up: "He groans!&mdash;he
+ is not a god!" So they closed in upon him and dispatched him.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ His flesh was stripped from the bones and burned (except nine pounds of it
+ which were sent on board the ships). The heart was hung up in a native
+ hut, where it was found and eaten by three children, who mistook it for
+ the heart of a dog. One of these children grew to be a very old man, and
+ died in Honolulu a few years ago. Some of Cook's bones were recovered and
+ consigned to the deep by the officers of the ships.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Small blame should attach to the natives for the killing of Cook. They
+ treated him well. In return, he abused them. He and his men inflicted
+ bodily injury upon many of them at different times, and killed at least
+ three of them before they offered any proportionate retaliation.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Near the shore we found "Cook's Monument"&mdash;only a cocoanut stump,
+ four feet high and about a foot in diameter at the butt. It had lava
+ boulders piled around its base to hold it up and keep it in its place, and
+ it was entirely sheathed over, from top to bottom, with rough, discolored
+ sheets of copper, such as ships' bottoms are coppered with. Each sheet had
+ a rude inscription scratched upon it&mdash;with a nail, apparently&mdash;and
+ in every case the execution was wretched. Most of these merely recorded
+ the visits of British naval commanders to the spot, but one of them bore
+ this legend:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Near this spot fell CAPTAIN JAMES COOK, The Distinguished
+ Circumnavigator, Who Discovered these Islands A. D. 1778."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After Cook's murder, his second in command, on board the ship, opened fire
+ upon the swarms of natives on the beach, and one of his cannon balls cut
+ this cocoanut tree short off and left this monumental stump standing. It
+ looked sad and lonely enough to us, out there in the rainy twilight. But
+ there is no other monument to Captain Cook. True, up on the mountain side
+ we had passed by a large inclosure like an ample hog-pen, built of lava
+ blocks, which marks the spot where Cook's flesh was stripped from his
+ bones and burned; but this is not properly a monument since it was erected
+ by the natives themselves, and less to do honor to the circumnavigator
+ than for the sake of convenience in roasting him. A thing like a
+ guide-board was elevated above this pen on a tall pole, and formerly there
+ was an inscription upon it describing the memorable occurrence that had
+ there taken place; but the sun and the wind have long ago so defaced it as
+ to render it illegible.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Toward midnight a fine breeze sprang up and the schooner soon worked
+ herself into the bay and cast anchor. The boat came ashore for us, and in
+ a little while the clouds and the rain were all gone. The moon was beaming
+ tranquilly down on land and sea, and we two were stretched upon the deck
+ sleeping the refreshing sleep and dreaming the happy dreams that are only
+ vouchsafed to the weary and the innocent.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch72" id="linkch72"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXXII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In the breezy morning we went ashore and visited the ruined temple of the
+ last god Lono. The high chief cook of this temple&mdash;the priest who
+ presided over it and roasted the human sacrifices&mdash;was uncle to
+ Obookia, and at one time that youth was an apprentice-priest under him.
+ Obookia was a young native of fine mind, who, together with three other
+ native boys, was taken to New England by the captain of a whaleship during
+ the reign of Kamehameha I, and they were the means of attracting the
+ attention of the religious world to their country. This resulted in the
+ sending of missionaries there. And this Obookia was the very same
+ sensitive savage who sat down on the church steps and wept because his
+ people did not have the Bible. That incident has been very elaborately
+ painted in many a charming Sunday School book&mdash;aye, and told so
+ plaintively and so tenderly that I have cried over it in Sunday School
+ myself, on general principles, although at a time when I did not know much
+ and could not understand why the people of the Sandwich Islands needed to
+ worry so much about it as long as they did not know there was a Bible at
+ all.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Obookia was converted and educated, and was to have returned to his native
+ land with the first missionaries, had he lived. The other native youths
+ made the voyage, and two of them did good service, but the third, William
+ Kanui, fell from grace afterward, for a time, and when the gold excitement
+ broke out in California he journeyed thither and went to mining, although
+ he was fifty years old. He succeeded pretty well, but the failure of Page,
+ Bacon &amp; Co. relieved him of six thousand dollars, and then, to all
+ intents and purposes, he was a bankrupt in his old age and he resumed
+ service in the pulpit again. He died in Honolulu in 1864.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Quite a broad tract of land near the temple, extending from the sea to the
+ mountain top, was sacred to the god Lono in olden times&mdash;so sacred
+ that if a common native set his sacrilegious foot upon it it was judicious
+ for him to make his will, because his time had come. He might go around it
+ by water, but he could not cross it. It was well sprinkled with pagan
+ temples and stocked with awkward, homely idols carved out of logs of wood.
+ There was a temple devoted to prayers for rain&mdash;and with fine
+ sagacity it was placed at a point so well up on the mountain side that if
+ you prayed there twenty-four times a day for rain you would be likely to
+ get it every time. You would seldom get to your Amen before you would have
+ to hoist your umbrella.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link518" id="link518"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="518.jpg (54K)" src="images/518.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ And there was a large temple near at hand which was built in a single
+ night, in the midst of storm and thunder and rain, by the ghastly hands of
+ dead men! Tradition says that by the weird glare of the lightning a
+ noiseless multitude of phantoms were seen at their strange labor far up
+ the mountain side at dead of night&mdash;flitting hither and thither and
+ bearing great lava-blocks clasped in their nerveless fingers&mdash;appearing
+ and disappearing as the pallid lustre fell upon their forms and faded away
+ again. Even to this day, it is said, the natives hold this dread structure
+ in awe and reverence, and will not pass by it in the night.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link519" id="link519"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="519.jpg (43K)" src="images/519.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At noon I observed a bevy of nude native young ladies bathing in the sea,
+ and went and sat down on their clothes to keep them from being stolen. I
+ begged them to come out, for the sea was rising and I was satisfied that
+ they were running some risk. But they were not afraid, and presently went
+ on with their sport. They were finished swimmers and divers, and enjoyed
+ themselves to the last degree.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ They swam races, splashed and ducked and tumbled each other about, and
+ filled the air with their laughter. It is said that the first thing an
+ Islander learns is how to swim; learning to walk being a matter of smaller
+ consequence, comes afterward. One hears tales of native men and women
+ swimming ashore from vessels many miles at sea&mdash;more miles, indeed,
+ than I dare vouch for or even mention. And they tell of a native diver who
+ went down in thirty or forty-foot waters and brought up an anvil! I think
+ he swallowed the anvil afterward, if my memory serves me. However I will
+ not urge this point.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I have spoken, several times, of the god Lono&mdash;I may as well furnish
+ two or three sentences concerning him.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The idol the natives worshipped for him was a slender, unornamented staff
+ twelve feet long. Tradition says he was a favorite god on the Island of
+ Hawaii&mdash;a great king who had been deified for meritorious services&mdash;just
+ our own fashion of rewarding heroes, with the difference that we would
+ have made him a Postmaster instead of a god, no doubt. In an angry moment
+ he slew his wife, a goddess named Kaikilani Aiii. Remorse of conscience
+ drove him mad, and tradition presents us the singular spectacle of a god
+ traveling "on the shoulder;" for in his gnawing grief he wandered about
+ from place to place boxing and wrestling with all whom he met. Of course
+ this pastime soon lost its novelty, inasmuch as it must necessarily have
+ been the case that when so powerful a deity sent a frail human opponent
+ "to grass" he never came back any more. Therefore, he instituted games
+ called makahiki, and ordered that they should be held in his honor, and
+ then sailed for foreign lands on a three-cornered raft, stating that he
+ would return some day&mdash;and that was the last of Lono. He was never
+ seen any more; his raft got swamped, perhaps. But the people always
+ expected his return, and thus they were easily led to accept Captain Cook
+ as the restored god.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Some of the old natives believed Cook was Lono to the day of their death;
+ but many did not, for they could not understand how he could die if he was
+ a god.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Only a mile or so from Kealakekua Bay is a spot of historic interest&mdash;the
+ place where the last battle was fought for idolatry. Of course we visited
+ it, and came away as wise as most people do who go and gaze upon such
+ mementoes of the past when in an unreflective mood.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ While the first missionaries were on their way around the Horn, the
+ idolatrous customs which had obtained in the island, as far back as
+ tradition reached were suddenly broken up. Old Kamehameha I., was dead,
+ and his son, Liholiho, the new King was a free liver, a roystering,
+ dissolute fellow, and hated the restraints of the ancient tabu. His
+ assistant in the Government, Kaahumanu, the Queen dowager, was proud and
+ high-spirited, and hated the tabu because it restricted the privileges of
+ her sex and degraded all women very nearly to the level of brutes. So the
+ case stood. Liholiho had half a mind to put his foot down, Kaahumahu had a
+ whole mind to badger him into doing it, and whiskey did the rest. It was
+ probably the rest. It was probably the first time whiskey ever prominently
+ figured as an aid to civilization. Liholiho came up to Kailua as drunk as
+ a piper, and attended a great feast; the determined Queen spurred his
+ drunken courage up to a reckless pitch, and then, while all the multitude
+ stared in blank dismay, he moved deliberately forward and sat down with
+ the women!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ They saw him eat from the same vessel with them, and were appalled!
+ Terrible moments drifted slowly by, and still the King ate, still he
+ lived, still the lightnings of the insulted gods were withheld! Then
+ conviction came like a revelation&mdash;the superstitions of a hundred
+ generations passed from before the people like a cloud, and a shout went
+ up, "the tabu is broken! the tabu is broken!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link521" id="link521"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="521.jpg (100K)" src="images/521.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Thus did King Liholiho and his dreadful whiskey preach the first sermon
+ and prepare the way for the new gospel that was speeding southward over
+ the waves of the Atlantic.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The tabu broken and destruction failing to follow the awful sacrilege, the
+ people, with that childlike precipitancy which has always characterized
+ them, jumped to the conclusion that their gods were a weak and wretched
+ swindle, just as they formerly jumped to the conclusion that Captain Cook
+ was no god, merely because he groaned, and promptly killed him without
+ stopping to inquire whether a god might not groan as well as a man if it
+ suited his convenience to do it; and satisfied that the idols were
+ powerless to protect themselves they went to work at once and pulled them
+ down&mdash;hacked them to pieces&mdash;applied the torch&mdash;annihilated
+ them!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The pagan priests were furious. And well they might be; they had held the
+ fattest offices in the land, and now they were beggared; they had been
+ great&mdash;they had stood above the chiefs&mdash;and now they were
+ vagabonds. They raised a revolt; they scared a number of people into
+ joining their standard, and Bekuokalani, an ambitious offshoot of royalty,
+ was easily persuaded to become their leader.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In the first skirmish the idolaters triumphed over the royal army sent
+ against them, and full of confidence they resolved to march upon Kailua.
+ The King sent an envoy to try and conciliate them, and came very near
+ being an envoy short by the operation; the savages not only refused to
+ listen to him, but wanted to kill him. So the King sent his men forth
+ under Major General Kalaimoku and the two host met a Kuamoo. The battle
+ was long and fierce&mdash;men and women fighting side by side, as was the
+ custom&mdash;and when the day was done the rebels were flying in every
+ direction in hopeless panic, and idolatry and the tabu were dead in the
+ land!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The royalists marched gayly home to Kailua glorifying the new
+ dispensation. "There is no power in the gods," said they; "they are a
+ vanity and a lie. The army with idols was weak; the army without idols was
+ strong and victorious!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The nation was without a religion.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The missionary ship arrived in safety shortly afterward, timed by
+ providential exactness to meet the emergency, and the Gospel was planted
+ as in a virgin soil.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link523" id="link523"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="523.jpg (57K)" src="images/523.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch73" id="linkch73"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXXIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At noon, we hired a Kanaka to take us down to the ancient ruins at
+ Honaunan in his canoe&mdash;price two dollars&mdash;reasonable enough, for
+ a sea voyage of eight miles, counting both ways.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The native canoe is an irresponsible looking contrivance. I cannot think
+ of anything to liken it to but a boy's sled runner hollowed out, and that
+ does not quite convey the correct idea. It is about fifteen feet long,
+ high and pointed at both ends, is a foot and a half or two feet deep, and
+ so narrow that if you wedged a fat man into it you might not get him out
+ again. It sits on top of the water like a duck, but it has an outrigger
+ and does not upset easily, if you keep still. This outrigger is formed of
+ two long bent sticks like plow handles, which project from one side, and
+ to their outer ends is bound a curved beam composed of an extremely light
+ wood, which skims along the surface of the water and thus saves you from
+ an upset on that side, while the outrigger's weight is not so easily
+ lifted as to make an upset on the other side a thing to be greatly feared.
+ Still, until one gets used to sitting perched upon this knifeblade, he is
+ apt to reason within himself that it would be more comfortable if there
+ were just an outrigger or so on the other side also. I had the bow seat,
+ and Billings sat amidships and faced the Kanaka, who occupied the stern of
+ the craft and did the paddling. With the first stroke the trim shell of a
+ thing shot out from the shore like an arrow. There was not much to see.
+ While we were on the shallow water of the reef, it was pastime to look
+ down into the limpid depths at the large bunches of branching coral&mdash;the
+ unique shrubbery of the sea. We lost that, though, when we got out into
+ the dead blue water of the deep. But we had the picture of the surf, then,
+ dashing angrily against the crag- bound shore and sending a foaming spray
+ high into the air.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There was interest in this beetling border, too, for it was honey-combed
+ with quaint caves and arches and tunnels, and had a rude semblance of the
+ dilapidated architecture of ruined keeps and castles rising out of the
+ restless sea. When this novelty ceased to be a novelty, we turned our eyes
+ shoreward and gazed at the long mountain with its rich green forests
+ stretching up into the curtaining clouds, and at the specks of houses in
+ the rearward distance and the diminished schooner riding sleepily at
+ anchor. And when these grew tiresome we dashed boldly into the midst of a
+ school of huge, beastly porpoises engaged at their eternal game of arching
+ over a wave and disappearing, and then doing it over again and keeping it
+ up&mdash;always circling over, in that way, like so many well- submerged
+ wheels. But the porpoises wheeled themselves away, and then we were thrown
+ upon our own resources. It did not take many minutes to discover that the
+ sun was blazing like a bonfire, and that the weather was of a melting
+ temperature. It had a drowsing effect, too.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link525" id="link525"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="525.jpg (87K)" src="images/525.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In one place we came upon a large company of naked natives, of both sexes
+ and all ages, amusing themselves with the national pastime of
+ surf-bathing. Each heathen would paddle three or four hundred yards out to
+ sea, (taking a short board with him), then face the shore and wait for a
+ particularly prodigious billow to come along; at the right moment he would
+ fling his board upon its foamy crest and himself upon the board, and here
+ he would come whizzing by like a bombshell! It did not seem that a
+ lightning express train could shoot along at a more hair-lifting speed. I
+ tried surf-bathing once, subsequently, but made a failure of it. I got the
+ board placed right, and at the right moment, too; but missed the
+ connection myself.&mdash;The board struck the shore in three quarters of a
+ second, without any cargo, and I struck the bottom about the same time,
+ with a couple of barrels of water in me. None but natives ever master the
+ art of surf-bathing thoroughly.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link526" id="link526"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="526.jpg (33K)" src="images/526.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At the end of an hour, we had made the four miles, and landed on a level
+ point of land, upon which was a wide extent of old ruins, with many a tall
+ cocoanut tree growing among them. Here was the ancient City of Refuge&mdash;a
+ vast inclosure, whose stone walls were twenty feet thick at the base, and
+ fifteen feet high; an oblong square, a thousand and forty feet one way and
+ a fraction under seven hundred the other. Within this inclosure, in early
+ times, has been three rude temples; each two hundred and ten feet long by
+ one hundred wide, and thirteen high.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In those days, if a man killed another anywhere on the island the
+ relatives were privileged to take the murderer's life; and then a chase
+ for life and liberty began&mdash;the outlawed criminal flying through
+ pathless forests and over mountain and plain, with his hopes fixed upon
+ the protecting walls of the City of Refuge, and the avenger of blood
+ following hotly after him!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Sometimes the race was kept up to the very gates of the temple, and the
+ panting pair sped through long files of excited natives, who watched the
+ contest with flashing eye and dilated nostril, encouraging the hunted
+ refugee with sharp, inspiriting ejaculations, and sending up a ringing
+ shout of exultation when the saving gates closed upon him and the cheated
+ pursuer sank exhausted at the threshold. But sometimes the flying criminal
+ fell under the hand of the avenger at the very door, when one more brave
+ stride, one more brief second of time would have brought his feet upon the
+ sacred ground and barred him against all harm. Where did these isolated
+ pagans get this idea of a City of Refuge&mdash;this ancient Oriental
+ custom?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link527" id="link527"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="527.jpg (73K)" src="images/527.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This old sanctuary was sacred to all&mdash;even to rebels in arms and
+ invading armies. Once within its walls, and confession made to the priest
+ and absolution obtained, the wretch with a price upon his head could go
+ forth without fear and without danger&mdash;he was tabu, and to harm him
+ was death. The routed rebels in the lost battle for idolatry fled to this
+ place to claim sanctuary, and many were thus saved.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Close to the corner of the great inclosure is a round structure of stone,
+ some six or eight feet high, with a level top about ten or twelve in
+ diameter. This was the place of execution. A high palisade of cocoanut
+ piles shut out the cruel scenes from the vulgar multitude. Here criminals
+ were killed, the flesh stripped from the bones and burned, and the bones
+ secreted in holes in the body of the structure. If the man had been guilty
+ of a high crime, the entire corpse was burned.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The walls of the temple are a study. The same food for speculation that is
+ offered the visitor to the Pyramids of Egypt he will find here&mdash;the
+ mystery of how they were constructed by a people unacquainted with science
+ and mechanics. The natives have no invention of their own for hoisting
+ heavy weights, they had no beasts of burden, and they have never even
+ shown any knowledge of the properties of the lever. Yet some of the lava
+ blocks quarried out, brought over rough, broken ground, and built into
+ this wall, six or seven feet from the ground, are of prodigious size and
+ would weigh tons. How did they transport and how raise them?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Both the inner and outer surfaces of the walls present a smooth front and
+ are very creditable specimens of masonry. The blocks are of all manner of
+ shapes and sizes, but yet are fitted together with the neatest exactness.
+ The gradual narrowing of the wall from the base upward is accurately
+ preserved.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ No cement was used, but the edifice is firm and compact and is capable of
+ resisting storm and decay for centuries. Who built this temple, and how
+ was it built, and when, are mysteries that may never be unraveled. Outside
+ of these ancient walls lies a sort of coffin-shaped stone eleven feet four
+ inches long and three feet square at the small end (it would weigh a few
+ thousand pounds), which the high chief who held sway over this district
+ many centuries ago brought thither on his shoulder one day to use as a
+ lounge! This circumstance is established by the most reliable traditions.
+ He used to lie down on it, in his indolent way, and keep an eye on his
+ subjects at work for him and see that there was no "soldiering" done. And
+ no doubt there was not any done to speak of, because he was a man of that
+ sort of build that incites to attention to business on the part of an
+ employee.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He was fourteen or fifteen feet high. When he stretched himself at full
+ length on his lounge, his legs hung down over the end, and when he snored
+ he woke the dead. These facts are all attested by irrefragable tradition.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link529" id="link529"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="529.jpg (86K)" src="images/529.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On the other side of the temple is a monstrous seven-ton rock, eleven feet
+ long, seven feet wide and three feet thick. It is raised a foot or a foot
+ and a half above the ground, and rests upon half a dozen little stony
+ pedestals. The same old fourteen-footer brought it down from the mountain,
+ merely for fun (he had his own notions about fun), and propped it up as we
+ find it now and as others may find it a century hence, for it would take a
+ score of horses to budge it from its position. They say that fifty or
+ sixty years ago the proud Queen Kaahumanu used to fly to this rock for
+ safety, whenever she had been making trouble with her fierce husband, and
+ hide under it until his wrath was appeased. But these Kanakas will lie,
+ and this statement is one of their ablest efforts&mdash;for Kaahumanu was
+ six feet high&mdash;she was bulky&mdash;she was built like an ox&mdash;and
+ she could no more have squeezed herself under that rock than she could
+ have passed between the cylinders of a sugar mill. What could she gain by
+ it, even if she succeeded? To be chased and abused by a savage husband
+ could not be otherwise than humiliating to her high spirit, yet it could
+ never make her feel so flat as an hour's repose under that rock would.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We walked a mile over a raised macadamized road of uniform width; a road
+ paved with flat stones and exhibiting in its every detail a considerable
+ degree of engineering skill. Some say that that wise old pagan, Kamehameha
+ I planned and built it, but others say it was built so long before his
+ time that the knowledge of who constructed it has passed out of the
+ traditions. In either case, however, as the handiwork of an untaught and
+ degraded race it is a thing of pleasing interest. The stones are worn and
+ smooth, and pushed apart in places, so that the road has the exact
+ appearance of those ancient paved highways leading out of Rome which one
+ sees in pictures.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The object of our tramp was to visit a great natural curiosity at the base
+ of the foothills&mdash;a congealed cascade of lava. Some old forgotten
+ volcanic eruption sent its broad river of fire down the mountain side
+ here, and it poured down in a great torrent from an overhanging bluff some
+ fifty feet high to the ground below. The flaming torrent cooled in the
+ winds from the sea, and remains there to-day, all seamed, and frothed and
+ rippled a petrified Niagara. It is very picturesque, and withal so natural
+ that one might almost imagine it still flowed. A smaller stream trickled
+ over the cliff and built up an isolated pyramid about thirty feet high,
+ which has the semblance of a mass of large gnarled and knotted vines and
+ roots and stems intricately twisted and woven together.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We passed in behind the cascade and the pyramid, and found the bluff
+ pierced by several cavernous tunnels, whose crooked courses we followed a
+ long distance.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Two of these winding tunnels stand as proof of Nature's mining abilities.
+ Their floors are level, they are seven feet wide, and their roofs are
+ gently arched. Their height is not uniform, however. We passed through one
+ a hundred feet long, which leads through a spur of the hill and opens out
+ well up in the sheer wall of a precipice whose foot rests in the waves of
+ the sea. It is a commodious tunnel, except that there are occasional
+ places in it where one must stoop to pass under. The roof is lava, of
+ course, and is thickly studded with little lava-pointed icicles an inch
+ long, which hardened as they dripped. They project as closely together as
+ the iron teeth of a corn-sheller, and if one will stand up straight and
+ walk any distance there, he can get his hair combed free of charge.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link531" id="link531"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="531.jpg (55K)" src="images/531.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch74" id="linkch74"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXXIV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We got back to the schooner in good time, and then sailed down to Kau,
+ where we disembarked and took final leave of the vessel. Next day we
+ bought horses and bent our way over the summer-clad mountain-terraces,
+ toward the great volcano of Kilauea (Ke-low-way-ah). We made nearly a two
+ days' journey of it, but that was on account of laziness. Toward sunset on
+ the second day, we reached an elevation of some four thousand feet above
+ sea level, and as we picked our careful way through billowy wastes of lava
+ long generations ago stricken dead and cold in the climax of its tossing
+ fury, we began to come upon signs of the near presence of the volcano&mdash;signs
+ in the nature of ragged fissures that discharged jets of sulphurous vapor
+ into the air, hot from the molten ocean down in the bowels of the
+ mountain.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Shortly the crater came into view. I have seen Vesuvius since, but it was
+ a mere toy, a child's volcano, a soup-kettle, compared to this. Mount
+ Vesuvius is a shapely cone thirty-six hundred feet high; its crater an
+ inverted cone only three hundred feet deep, and not more than a thousand
+ feet in diameter, if as much as that; its fires meagre, modest, and
+ docile.&mdash;But here was a vast, perpendicular, walled cellar, nine
+ hundred feet deep in some places, thirteen hundred in others, level-
+ floored, and ten miles in circumference! Here was a yawning pit upon whose
+ floor the armies of Russia could camp, and have room to spare.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Perched upon the edge of the crater, at the opposite end from where we
+ stood, was a small look-out house&mdash;say three miles away. It assisted
+ us, by comparison, to comprehend and appreciate the great depth of the
+ basin&mdash;it looked like a tiny martin-box clinging at the eaves of a
+ cathedral. After some little time spent in resting and looking and
+ ciphering, we hurried on to the hotel.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By the path it is half a mile from the Volcano House to the lookout-
+ house. After a hearty supper we waited until it was thoroughly dark and
+ then started to the crater. The first glance in that direction revealed a
+ scene of wild beauty. There was a heavy fog over the crater and it was
+ splendidly illuminated by the glare from the fires below. The illumination
+ was two miles wide and a mile high, perhaps; and if you ever, on a dark
+ night and at a distance beheld the light from thirty or forty blocks of
+ distant buildings all on fire at once, reflected strongly against
+ over-hanging clouds, you can form a fair idea of what this looked like.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link533" id="link533"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="533.jpg (37K)" src="images/533.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A colossal column of cloud towered to a great height in the air
+ immediately above the crater, and the outer swell of every one of its vast
+ folds was dyed with a rich crimson luster, which was subdued to a pale
+ rose tint in the depressions between. It glowed like a muffled torch and
+ stretched upward to a dizzy height toward the zenith. I thought it just
+ possible that its like had not been seen since the children of Israel
+ wandered on their long march through the desert so many centuries ago over
+ a path illuminated by the mysterious "pillar of fire." And I was sure that
+ I now had a vivid conception of what the majestic "pillar of fire" was
+ like, which almost amounted to a revelation.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Arrived at the little thatched lookout house, we rested our elbows on the
+ railing in front and looked abroad over the wide crater and down over the
+ sheer precipice at the seething fires beneath us. The view was a startling
+ improvement on my daylight experience. I turned to see the effect on the
+ balance of the company and found the reddest-faced set of men I almost
+ ever saw. In the strong light every countenance glowed like red-hot iron,
+ every shoulder was suffused with crimson and shaded rearward into dingy,
+ shapeless obscurity! The place below looked like the infernal regions and
+ these men like half-cooled devils just come up on a furlough.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I turned my eyes upon the volcano again. The "cellar" was tolerably well
+ lighted up. For a mile and a half in front of us and half a mile on either
+ side, the floor of the abyss was magnificently illuminated; beyond these
+ limits the mists hung down their gauzy curtains and cast a deceptive gloom
+ over all that made the twinkling fires in the remote corners of the crater
+ seem countless leagues removed&mdash;made them seem like the camp-fires of
+ a great army far away. Here was room for the imagination to work! You
+ could imagine those lights the width of a continent away&mdash;and that
+ hidden under the intervening darkness were hills, and winding rivers, and
+ weary wastes of plain and desert&mdash;and even then the tremendous vista
+ stretched on, and on, and on!&mdash;to the fires and far beyond! You could
+ not compass it&mdash;it was the idea of eternity made tangible&mdash;and
+ the longest end of it made visible to the naked eye!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link535" id="link535"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="535.jpg (125K)" src="images/535.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The greater part of the vast floor of the desert under us was as black as
+ ink, and apparently smooth and level; but over a mile square of it was
+ ringed and streaked and striped with a thousand branching streams of
+ liquid and gorgeously brilliant fire! It looked like a colossal railroad
+ map of the State of Massachusetts done in chain lightning on a midnight
+ sky. Imagine it&mdash;imagine a coal-black sky shivered into a tangled
+ net- work of angry fire!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Here and there were gleaming holes a hundred feet in diameter, broken in
+ the dark crust, and in them the melted lava&mdash;the color a dazzling
+ white just tinged with yellow&mdash;was boiling and surging furiously; and
+ from these holes branched numberless bright torrents in many directions,
+ like the spokes of a wheel, and kept a tolerably straight course for a
+ while and then swept round in huge rainbow curves, or made a long
+ succession of sharp worm-fence angles, which looked precisely like the
+ fiercest jagged lightning. These streams met other streams, and they
+ mingled with and crossed and recrossed each other in every conceivable
+ direction, like skate tracks on a popular skating ground. Sometimes
+ streams twenty or thirty feet wide flowed from the holes to some distance
+ without dividing&mdash;and through the opera-glasses we could see that
+ they ran down small, steep hills and were genuine cataracts of fire, white
+ at their source, but soon cooling and turning to the richest red, grained
+ with alternate lines of black and gold. Every now and then masses of the
+ dark crust broke away and floated slowly down these streams like rafts
+ down a river. Occasionally the molten lava flowing under the
+ superincumbent crust broke through&mdash;split a dazzling streak, from
+ five hundred to a thousand feet long, like a sudden flash of lightning,
+ and then acre after acre of the cold lava parted into fragments, turned up
+ edgewise like cakes of ice when a great river breaks up, plunged downward
+ and were swallowed in the crimson cauldron. Then the wide expanse of the
+ "thaw" maintained a ruddy glow for a while, but shortly cooled and became
+ black and level again. During a "thaw," every dismembered cake was marked
+ by a glittering white border which was superbly shaded inward by aurora
+ borealis rays, which were a flaming yellow where they joined the white
+ border, and from thence toward their points tapered into glowing crimson,
+ then into a rich, pale carmine, and finally into a faint blush that held
+ its own a moment and then dimmed and turned black. Some of the streams
+ preferred to mingle together in a tangle of fantastic circles, and then
+ they looked something like the confusion of ropes one sees on a ship's
+ deck when she has just taken in sail and dropped anchor&mdash;provided one
+ can imagine those ropes on fire.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Through the glasses, the little fountains scattered about looked very
+ beautiful. They boiled, and coughed, and spluttered, and discharged sprays
+ of stringy red fire&mdash;of about the consistency of mush, for instance&mdash;from
+ ten to fifteen feet into the air, along with a shower of brilliant white
+ sparks&mdash;a quaint and unnatural mingling of gouts of blood and
+ snow-flakes!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We had circles and serpents and streaks of lightning all twined and
+ wreathed and tied together, without a break throughout an area more than a
+ mile square (that amount of ground was covered, though it was not strictly
+ "square"), and it was with a feeling of placid exultation that we
+ reflected that many years had elapsed since any visitor had seen such a
+ splendid display&mdash;since any visitor had seen anything more than the
+ now snubbed and insignificant "North" and "South" lakes in action. We had
+ been reading old files of Hawaiian newspapers and the "Record Book" at the
+ Volcano House, and were posted.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I could see the North Lake lying out on the black floor away off in the
+ outer edge of our panorama, and knitted to it by a web-work of lava
+ streams. In its individual capacity it looked very little more respectable
+ than a schoolhouse on fire. True, it was about nine hundred feet long and
+ two or three hundred wide, but then, under the present circumstances, it
+ necessarily appeared rather insignificant, and besides it was so distant
+ from us.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I forgot to say that the noise made by the bubbling lava is not great,
+ heard as we heard it from our lofty perch. It makes three distinct sounds&mdash;a
+ rushing, a hissing, and a coughing or puffing sound; and if you stand on
+ the brink and close your eyes it is no trick at all to imagine that you
+ are sweeping down a river on a large low-pressure steamer, and that you
+ hear the hissing of the steam about her boilers, the puffing from her
+ escape-pipes and the churning rush of the water abaft her wheels. The
+ smell of sulphur is strong, but not unpleasant to a sinner.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We left the lookout house at ten o'clock in a half cooked condition,
+ because of the heat from Pele's furnaces, and wrapping up in blankets, for
+ the night was cold, we returned to our Hotel.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch75" id="linkch75"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXXV.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The next night was appointed for a visit to the bottom of the crater, for
+ we desired to traverse its floor and see the "North Lake" (of fire) which
+ lay two miles away, toward the further wall. After dark half a dozen of us
+ set out, with lanterns and native guides, and climbed down a crazy,
+ thousand-foot pathway in a crevice fractured in the crater wall, and
+ reached the bottom in safety.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The irruption of the previous evening had spent its force and the floor
+ looked black and cold; but when we ran out upon it we found it hot yet, to
+ the feet, and it was likewise riven with crevices which revealed the
+ underlying fires gleaming vindictively. A neighboring cauldron was
+ threatening to overflow, and this added to the dubiousness of the
+ situation. So the native guides refused to continue the venture, and then
+ every body deserted except a stranger named Marlette. He said he had been
+ in the crater a dozen times in daylight and believed he could find his way
+ through it at night. He thought that a run of three hundred yards would
+ carry us over the hottest part of the floor and leave us our shoe-soles.
+ His pluck gave me back-bone. We took one lantern and instructed the guides
+ to hang the other to the roof of the look-out house to serve as a beacon
+ for us in case we got lost, and then the party started back up the
+ precipice and Marlette and I made our run. We skipped over the hot floor
+ and over the red crevices with brisk dispatch and reached the cold lava
+ safe but with pretty warm feet. Then we took things leisurely and
+ comfortably, jumping tolerably wide and probably bottomless chasms, and
+ threading our way through picturesque lava upheavals with considerable
+ confidence. When we got fairly away from the cauldrons of boiling fire, we
+ seemed to be in a gloomy desert, and a suffocatingly dark one, surrounded
+ by dim walls that seemed to tower to the sky. The only cheerful objects
+ were the glinting stars high overhead.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ By and by Marlette shouted "Stop!" I never stopped quicker in my life. I
+ asked what the matter was. He said we were out of the path. He said we
+ must not try to go on till we found it again, for we were surrounded with
+ beds of rotten lava through which we could easily break and plunge down a
+ thousand feet. I thought eight hundred would answer for me, and was about
+ to say so when Marlette partly proved his statement by accidentally
+ crushing through and disappearing to his arm-pits.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link539" id="link539"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="539.jpg (43K)" src="images/539.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He got out and we hunted for the path with the lantern. He said there was
+ only one path and that it was but vaguely defined. We could not find it.
+ The lava surface was all alike in the lantern light. But he was an
+ ingenious man. He said it was not the lantern that had informed him that
+ we were out of the path, but his feet. He had noticed a crisp grinding of
+ fine lava-needles under his feet, and some instinct reminded him that in
+ the path these were all worn away. So he put the lantern behind him, and
+ began to search with his boots instead of his eyes. It was good sagacity.
+ The first time his foot touched a surface that did not grind under it he
+ announced that the trail was found again; and after that we kept up a
+ sharp listening for the rasping sound and it always warned us in time.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was a long tramp, but an exciting one. We reached the North Lake
+ between ten and eleven o'clock, and sat down on a huge overhanging lava-
+ shelf, tired but satisfied. The spectacle presented was worth coming
+ double the distance to see. Under us, and stretching away before us, was a
+ heaving sea of molten fire of seemingly limitless extent. The glare from
+ it was so blinding that it was some time before we could bear to look upon
+ it steadily.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was like gazing at the sun at noon-day, except that the glare was not
+ quite so white. At unequal distances all around the shores of the lake
+ were nearly white-hot chimneys or hollow drums of lava, four or five feet
+ high, and up through them were bursting gorgeous sprays of lava-gouts and
+ gem spangles, some white, some red and some golden&mdash;a ceaseless
+ bombardment, and one that fascinated the eye with its unapproachable
+ splendor. The mere distant jets, sparkling up through an intervening
+ gossamer veil of vapor, seemed miles away; and the further the curving
+ ranks of fiery fountains receded, the more fairy-like and beautiful they
+ appeared.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link540" id="link540"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="540.jpg (78K)" src="images/540.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Now and then the surging bosom of the lake under our noses would calm down
+ ominously and seem to be gathering strength for an enterprise; and then
+ all of a sudden a red dome of lava of the bulk of an ordinary dwelling
+ would heave itself aloft like an escaping balloon, then burst asunder, and
+ out of its heart would flit a pale-green film of vapor, and float upward
+ and vanish in the darkness&mdash;a released soul soaring homeward from
+ captivity with the damned, no doubt. The crashing plunge of the ruined
+ dome into the lake again would send a world of seething billows lashing
+ against the shores and shaking the foundations of our perch. By and by, a
+ loosened mass of the hanging shelf we sat on tumbled into the lake,
+ jarring the surroundings like an earthquake and delivering a suggestion
+ that may have been intended for a hint, and may not. We did not wait to
+ see.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We got lost again on our way back, and were more than an hour hunting for
+ the path. We were where we could see the beacon lantern at the look-out
+ house at the time, but thought it was a star and paid no attention to it.
+ We reached the hotel at two o'clock in the morning pretty well fagged out.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Kilauea never overflows its vast crater, but bursts a passage for its lava
+ through the mountain side when relief is necessary, and then the
+ destruction is fearful. About 1840 it rent its overburdened stomach and
+ sent a broad river of fire careering down to the sea, which swept away
+ forests, huts, plantations and every thing else that lay in its path. The
+ stream was five miles broad, in places, and two hundred feet deep, and the
+ distance it traveled was forty miles. It tore up and bore away
+ acre-patches of land on its bosom like rafts&mdash;rocks, trees and all
+ intact. At night the red glare was visible a hundred miles at sea; and at
+ a distance of forty miles fine print could be read at midnight. The
+ atmosphere was poisoned with sulphurous vapors and choked with falling
+ ashes, pumice stones and cinders; countless columns of smoke rose up and
+ blended together in a tumbled canopy that hid the heavens and glowed with
+ a ruddy flush reflected from the fires below; here and there jets of lava
+ sprung hundreds of feet into the air and burst into rocket-sprays that
+ returned to earth in a crimson rain; and all the while the laboring
+ mountain shook with Nature's great palsy and voiced its distress in
+ moanings and the muffled booming of subterranean thunders.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link542" id="link542"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="542.jpg (103K)" src="images/542.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Fishes were killed for twenty miles along the shore, where the lava
+ entered the sea. The earthquakes caused some loss of human life, and a
+ prodigious tidal wave swept inland, carrying every thing before it and
+ drowning a number of natives. The devastation consummated along the route
+ traversed by the river of lava was complete and incalculable. Only a
+ Pompeii and a Herculaneum were needed at the foot of Kilauea to make the
+ story of the irruption immortal.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link543" id="link543"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="543.jpg (113K)" src="images/543.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch76" id="linkch76"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXXVI.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We rode horseback all around the island of Hawaii (the crooked road making
+ the distance two hundred miles), and enjoyed the journey very much. We
+ were more than a week making the trip, because our Kanaka horses would not
+ go by a house or a hut without stopping&mdash;whip and spur could not
+ alter their minds about it, and so we finally found that it economized
+ time to let them have their way. Upon inquiry the mystery was explained:
+ the natives are such thorough-going gossips that they never pass a house
+ without stopping to swap news, and consequently their horses learn to
+ regard that sort of thing as an essential part of the whole duty of man,
+ and his salvation not to be compassed without it. However, at a former
+ crisis of my life I had once taken an aristocratic young lady out driving,
+ behind a horse that had just retired from a long and honorable career as
+ the moving impulse of a milk wagon, and so this present experience awoke a
+ reminiscent sadness in me in place of the exasperation more natural to the
+ occasion. I remembered how helpless I was that day, and how humiliated;
+ how ashamed I was of having intimated to the girl that I had always owned
+ the horse and was accustomed to grandeur; how hard I tried to appear easy,
+ and even vivacious, under suffering that was consuming my vitals; how
+ placidly and maliciously the girl smiled, and kept on smiling, while my
+ hot blushes baked themselves into a permanent blood-pudding in my face;
+ how the horse ambled from one side of the street to the other and waited
+ complacently before every third house two minutes and a quarter while I
+ belabored his back and reviled him in my heart; how I tried to keep him
+ from turning corners and failed; how I moved heaven and earth to get him
+ out of town, and did not succeed; how he traversed the entire settlement
+ and delivered imaginary milk at a hundred and sixty-two different
+ domiciles, and how he finally brought up at a dairy depot and refused to
+ budge further, thus rounding and completing the revealment of what the
+ plebeian service of his life had been; how, in eloquent silence, I walked
+ the girl home, and how, when I took leave of her, her parting remark
+ scorched my soul and appeared to blister me all over: she said that my
+ horse was a fine, capable animal, and I must have taken great comfort in
+ him in my time&mdash;but that if I would take along some milk-tickets next
+ time, and appear to deliver them at the various halting places, it might
+ expedite his movements a little. There was a coolness between us after
+ that.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link545" id="link545"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="545.jpg (90K)" src="images/545.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In one place in the island of Hawaii, we saw a laced and ruffled cataract
+ of limpid water leaping from a sheer precipice fifteen hundred feet high;
+ but that sort of scenery finds its stanchest ally in the arithmetic rather
+ than in spectacular effect. If one desires to be so stirred by a poem of
+ Nature wrought in the happily commingled graces of picturesque rocks,
+ glimpsed distances, foliage, color, shifting lights and shadows, and
+ failing water, that the tears almost come into his eyes so potent is the
+ charm exerted, he need not go away from America to enjoy such an
+ experience. The Rainbow Fall, in Watkins Glen (N.Y.), on the Erie railway,
+ is an example. It would recede into pitiable insignificance if the callous
+ tourist drew on arithmetic on it; but left to compete for the honors
+ simply on scenic grace and beauty&mdash;the grand, the august and the
+ sublime being barred the contest&mdash;it could challenge the old world
+ and the new to produce its peer.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In one locality, on our journey, we saw some horses that had been born and
+ reared on top of the mountains, above the range of running water, and
+ consequently they had never drank that fluid in their lives, but had been
+ always accustomed to quenching their thirst by eating dew-laden or
+ shower-wetted leaves. And now it was destructively funny to see them sniff
+ suspiciously at a pail of water, and then put in their noses and try to
+ take a bite out of the fluid, as if it were a solid. Finding it liquid,
+ they would snatch away their heads and fall to trembling, snorting and
+ showing other evidences of fright. When they became convinced at last that
+ the water was friendly and harmless, they thrust in their noses up to
+ their eyes, brought out a mouthful of water, and proceeded to chew it
+ complacently. We saw a man coax, kick and spur one of them five or ten
+ minutes before he could make it cross a running stream. It spread its
+ nostrils, distended its eyes and trembled all over, just as horses
+ customarily do in the presence of a serpent&mdash;and for aught I know it
+ thought the crawling stream was a serpent.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In due course of time our journey came to an end at Kawaehae (usually
+ pronounced To-a-hi&mdash;and before we find fault with this elaborate
+ orthographical method of arriving at such an unostentatious result, let us
+ lop off the ugh from our word "though"). I made this horseback trip on a
+ mule. I paid ten dollars for him at Kau (Kah-oo), added four to get him
+ shod, rode him two hundred miles, and then sold him for fifteen dollars. I
+ mark the circumstance with a white stone (in the absence of chalk&mdash;for
+ I never saw a white stone that a body could mark anything with, though out
+ of respect for the ancients I have tried it often enough); for up to that
+ day and date it was the first strictly commercial transaction I had ever
+ entered into, and come out winner. We returned to Honolulu, and from
+ thence sailed to the island of Maui, and spent several weeks there very
+ pleasantly. I still remember, with a sense of indolent luxury, a picnicing
+ excursion up a romantic gorge there, called the Iao Valley. The trail lay
+ along the edge of a brawling stream in the bottom of the gorge&mdash;a
+ shady route, for it was well roofed with the verdant domes of forest
+ trees. Through openings in the foliage we glimpsed picturesque scenery
+ that revealed ceaseless changes and new charms with every step of our
+ progress. Perpendicular walls from one to three thousand feet high guarded
+ the way, and were sumptuously plumed with varied foliage, in places, and
+ in places swathed in waving ferns. Passing shreds of cloud trailed their
+ shadows across these shining fronts, mottling them with blots; billowy
+ masses of white vapor hid the turreted summits, and far above the vapor
+ swelled a background of gleaming green crags and cones that came and went,
+ through the veiling mists, like islands drifting in a fog; sometimes the
+ cloudy curtain descended till half the canon wall was hidden, then
+ shredded gradually away till only airy glimpses of the ferny front
+ appeared through it&mdash;then swept aloft and left it glorified in the
+ sun again. Now and then, as our position changed, rocky bastions swung out
+ from the wall, a mimic ruin of castellated ramparts and crumbling towers
+ clothed with mosses and hung with garlands of swaying vines, and as we
+ moved on they swung back again and hid themselves once more in the
+ foliage. Presently a verdure-clad needle of stone, a thousand feet high,
+ stepped out from behind a corner, and mounted guard over the mysteries of
+ the valley. It seemed to me that if Captain Cook needed a monument, here
+ was one ready made&mdash;therefore, why not put up his sign here, and sell
+ out the venerable cocoanut stump?
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link547" id="link547"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="547.jpg (192K)" src="images/547.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ But the chief pride of Maui is her dead volcano of Haleakala&mdash;which
+ means, translated, "the house of the sun." We climbed a thousand feet up
+ the side of this isolated colossus one afternoon; then camped, and next
+ day climbed the remaining nine thousand feet, and anchored on the summit,
+ where we built a fire and froze and roasted by turns, all night. With the
+ first pallor of dawn we got up and saw things that were new to us. Mounted
+ on a commanding pinnacle, we watched Nature work her silent wonders. The
+ sea was spread abroad on every hand, its tumbled surface seeming only
+ wrinkled and dimpled in the distance. A broad valley below appeared like
+ an ample checker-board, its velvety green sugar plantations alternating
+ with dun squares of barrenness and groves of trees diminished to mossy
+ tufts. Beyond the valley were mountains picturesquely grouped together;
+ but bear in mind, we fancied that we were looking up at these things&mdash;not
+ down. We seemed to sit in the bottom of a symmetrical bowl ten thousand
+ feet deep, with the valley and the skirting sea lifted away into the sky
+ above us! It was curious; and not only curious, but aggravating; for it
+ was having our trouble all for nothing, to climb ten thousand feet toward
+ heaven and then have to look up at our scenery. However, we had to be
+ content with it and make the best of it; for, all we could do we could not
+ coax our landscape down out of the clouds. Formerly, when I had read an
+ article in which Poe treated of this singular fraud perpetrated upon the
+ eye by isolated great altitudes, I had looked upon the matter as an
+ invention of his own fancy.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I have spoken of the outside view&mdash;but we had an inside one, too.
+ That was the yawning dead crater, into which we now and then tumbled
+ rocks, half as large as a barrel, from our perch, and saw them go
+ careering down the almost perpendicular sides, bounding three hundred feet
+ at a jump; kicking up cast-clouds wherever they struck; diminishing to our
+ view as they sped farther into distance; growing invisible, finally, and
+ only betraying their course by faint little puffs of dust; and coming to a
+ halt at last in the bottom of the abyss, two thousand five hundred feet
+ down from where they started! It was magnificent sport. We wore ourselves
+ out at it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link549" id="link549"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="549.jpg (138K)" src="images/549.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The crater of Vesuvius, as I have before remarked, is a modest pit about a
+ thousand feet deep and three thousand in circumference; that of Kilauea is
+ somewhat deeper, and ten miles in circumference. But what are either of
+ them compared to the vacant stomach of Haleakala? I will not offer any
+ figures of my own, but give official ones&mdash;those of Commander Wilkes,
+ U.S.N., who surveyed it and testifies that it is twenty-seven miles in
+ circumference! If it had a level bottom it would make a fine site for a
+ city like London. It must have afforded a spectacle worth contemplating in
+ the old days when its furnaces gave full rein to their anger.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Presently vagrant white clouds came drifting along, high over the sea and
+ the valley; then they came in couples and groups; then in imposing
+ squadrons; gradually joining their forces, they banked themselves solidly
+ together, a thousand feet under us, and totally shut out land and ocean&mdash;not
+ a vestige of anything was left in view but just a little of the rim of the
+ crater, circling away from the pinnacle whereon we sat (for a ghostly
+ procession of wanderers from the filmy hosts without had drifted through a
+ chasm in the crater wall and filed round and round, and gathered and sunk
+ and blended together till the abyss was stored to the brim with a fleecy
+ fog). Thus banked, motion ceased, and silence reigned. Clear to the
+ horizon, league on league, the snowy floor stretched without a break&mdash;not
+ level, but in rounded folds, with shallow creases between, and with here
+ and there stately piles of vapory architecture lifting themselves aloft
+ out of the common plain&mdash;some near at hand, some in the middle
+ distances, and others relieving the monotony of the remote solitudes.
+ There was little conversation, for the impressive scene overawed speech. I
+ felt like the Last Man, neglected of the judgment, and left pinnacled in
+ mid-heaven, a forgotten relic of a vanished world.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ While the hush yet brooded, the messengers of the coming resurrection
+ appeared in the East. A growing warmth suffused the horizon, and soon the
+ sun emerged and looked out over the cloud-waste, flinging bars of ruddy
+ light across it, staining its folds and billow-caps with blushes, purpling
+ the shaded troughs between, and glorifying the massy vapor- palaces and
+ cathedrals with a wasteful splendor of all blendings and combinations of
+ rich coloring.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was the sublimest spectacle I ever witnessed, and I think the memory of
+ it will remain with me always.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch77" id="linkch77"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXXVII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I stumbled upon one curious character in the Island of Mani. He became a
+ sore annoyance to me in the course of time. My first glimpse of him was in
+ a sort of public room in the town of Lahaina. He occupied a chair at the
+ opposite side of the apartment, and sat eyeing our party with interest for
+ some minutes, and listening as critically to what we were saying as if he
+ fancied we were talking to him and expecting him to reply. I thought it
+ very sociable in a stranger. Presently, in the course of conversation, I
+ made a statement bearing upon the subject under discussion&mdash;and I
+ made it with due modesty, for there was nothing extraordinary about it,
+ and it was only put forth in illustration of a point at issue. I had
+ barely finished when this person spoke out with rapid utterance and
+ feverish anxiety:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh, that was certainly remarkable, after a fashion, but you ought to have
+ seen my chimney&mdash;you ought to have seen my chimney, sir! Smoke! I
+ wish I may hang if&mdash;Mr. Jones, you remember that chimney&mdash;you
+ must remember that chimney! No, no&mdash;I recollect, now, you warn't
+ living on this side of the island then. But I am telling you nothing but
+ the truth, and I wish I may never draw another breath if that chimney
+ didn't smoke so that the smoke actually got caked in it and I had to dig
+ it out with a pickaxe! You may smile, gentlemen, but the High Sheriff's
+ got a hunk of it which I dug out before his eyes, and so it's perfectly
+ easy for you to go and examine for yourselves."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The interruption broke up the conversation, which had already begun to
+ lag, and we presently hired some natives and an out-rigger canoe or two,
+ and went out to overlook a grand surf-bathing contest.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Two weeks after this, while talking in a company, I looked up and detected
+ this same man boring through and through me with his intense eye, and
+ noted again his twitching muscles and his feverish anxiety to speak. The
+ moment I paused, he said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Beg your pardon, sir, beg your pardon, but it can only be considered
+ remarkable when brought into strong outline by isolation. Sir, contrasted
+ with a circumstance which occurred in my own experience, it instantly
+ becomes commonplace. No, not that&mdash;for I will not speak so
+ discourteously of any experience in the career of a stranger and a
+ gentleman&mdash;but I am obliged to say that you could not, and you would
+ not ever again refer to this tree as a large one, if you could behold, as
+ I have, the great Yakmatack tree, in the island of Ounaska, sea of
+ Kamtchatka&mdash;a tree, sir, not one inch less than four hundred and
+ fifteen feet in solid diameter!&mdash;and I wish I may die in a minute if
+ it isn't so! Oh, you needn't look so questioning, gentlemen; here's old
+ Cap Saltmarsh can say whether I know what I'm talking about or not. I
+ showed him the tree."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Captain Saltmarsh&mdash;"Come, now, cat your anchor, lad&mdash;you're
+ heaving too taut. You promised to show me that stunner, and I walked more
+ than eleven mile with you through the cussedest jungle I ever see, a
+ hunting for it; but the tree you showed me finally warn't as big around as
+ a beer cask, and you know that your own self, Markiss."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link553" id="link553"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="553.jpg (48K)" src="images/553.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Hear the man talk! Of course the tree was reduced that way, but didn't I
+ explain it? Answer me, didn't I? Didn't I say I wished you could have seen
+ it when I first saw it? When you got up on your ear and called me names,
+ and said I had brought you eleven miles to look at a sapling, didn't I
+ explain to you that all the whale-ships in the North Seas had been wooding
+ off of it for more than twenty-seven years? And did you s'pose the tree
+ could last for-ever, con-found it? I don't see why you want to keep back
+ things that way, and try to injure a person that's never done you any
+ harm."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Somehow this man's presence made me uncomfortable, and I was glad when a
+ native arrived at that moment to say that Muckawow, the most companionable
+ and luxurious among the rude war-chiefs of the Islands, desired us to come
+ over and help him enjoy a missionary whom he had found trespassing on his
+ grounds.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I think it was about ten days afterward that, as I finished a statement I
+ was making for the instruction of a group of friends and acquaintances,
+ and which made no pretence of being extraordinary, a familiar voice chimed
+ instantly in on the heels of my last word, and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "But, my dear sir, there was nothing remarkable about that horse, or the
+ circumstance either&mdash;nothing in the world! I mean no sort of offence
+ when I say it, sir, but you really do not know anything whatever about
+ speed. Bless your heart, if you could only have seen my mare Margaretta;
+ there was a beast!&mdash;there was lightning for you! Trot! Trot is no
+ name for it&mdash;she flew! How she could whirl a buggy along! I started
+ her out once, sir&mdash;Colonel Bilgewater, you recollect that animal
+ perfectly well&mdash;I started her out about thirty or thirty-five yards
+ ahead of the awfullest storm I ever saw in my life, and it chased us
+ upwards of eighteen miles! It did, by the everlasting hills! And I'm
+ telling you nothing but the unvarnished truth when I say that not one
+ single drop of rain fell on me&mdash;not a single drop, sir! And I swear
+ to it! But my dog was a-swimming behind the wagon all the way!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link554" id="link554"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="554.jpg (76K)" src="images/554.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ For a week or two I stayed mostly within doors, for I seemed to meet this
+ person everywhere, and he had become utterly hateful to me. But one
+ evening I dropped in on Captain Perkins and his friends, and we had a
+ sociable time. About ten o'clock I chanced to be talking about a merchant
+ friend of mine, and without really intending it, the remark slipped out
+ that he was a little mean and parsimonious about paying his workmen.
+ Instantly, through the steam of a hot whiskey punch on the opposite side
+ of the room, a remembered voice shot&mdash;and for a moment I trembled on
+ the imminent verge of profanity:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Oh, my dear sir, really you expose yourself when you parade that as a
+ surprising circumstance. Bless your heart and hide, you are ignorant of
+ the very A B C of meanness! ignorant as the unborn babe! ignorant as
+ unborn twins! You don't know anything about it! It is pitiable to see you,
+ sir, a well-spoken and prepossessing stranger, making such an enormous
+ pow-wow here about a subject concerning which your ignorance is perfectly
+ humiliating! Look me in the eye, if you please; look me in the eye. John
+ James Godfrey was the son of poor but honest parents in the State of
+ Mississippi&mdash;boyhood friend of mine&mdash;bosom comrade in later
+ years. Heaven rest his noble spirit, he is gone from us now. John James
+ Godfrey was hired by the Hayblossom Mining Company in California to do
+ some blasting for them&mdash;the "Incorporated Company of Mean Men," the
+ boys used to call it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, one day he drilled a hole about four feet deep and put in an awful
+ blast of powder, and was standing over it ramming it down with an iron
+ crowbar about nine foot long, when the cussed thing struck a spark and
+ fired the powder, and scat! away John Godfrey whizzed like a skyrocket,
+ him and his crowbar! Well, sir, he kept on going up in the air higher and
+ higher, till he didn't look any bigger than a boy&mdash;and he kept going
+ on up higher and higher, till he didn't look any bigger than a doll&mdash;and
+ he kept on going up higher and higher, till he didn't look any bigger than
+ a little small bee&mdash;and then he went out of sight! Presently he came
+ in sight again, looking like a little small bee&mdash;and he came along
+ down further and further, till he looked as big as a doll again&mdash;and
+ down further and further, till he was as big as a boy again&mdash;and
+ further and further, till he was a full-sized man once more; and then him
+ and his crowbar came a wh-izzing down and lit right exactly in the same
+ old tracks and went to r-ramming down, and r-ramming down, and r-ramming
+ down again, just the same as if nothing had happened! Now do you know,
+ that poor cuss warn't gone only sixteen minutes, and yet that Incorporated
+ Company of Mean Men DOCKED HIM FOR THE LOST TIME!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link555" id="link555"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="555.jpg (42K)" src="images/555.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I said I had the headache, and so excused myself and went home. And on my
+ diary I entered "another night spoiled" by this offensive loafer. And a
+ fervent curse was set down with it to keep the item company. And the very
+ next day I packed up, out of all patience, and left the Island.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Almost from the very beginning, I regarded that man as a liar.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The line of points represents an interval of years. At the end of which
+ time the opinion hazarded in that last sentence came to be gratifyingly
+ and remarkably endorsed, and by wholly disinterested persons. The man
+ Markiss was found one morning hanging to a beam of his own bedroom (the
+ doors and windows securely fastened on the inside), dead; and on his
+ breast was pinned a paper in his own handwriting begging his friends to
+ suspect no innocent person of having any thing to do with his death, for
+ that it was the work of his own hands entirely. Yet the jury brought in
+ the astounding verdict that deceased came to his death "by the hands of
+ some person or persons unknown!" They explained that the perfectly
+ undeviating consistency of Markiss's character for thirty years towered
+ aloft as colossal and indestructible testimony, that whatever statement he
+ chose to make was entitled to instant and unquestioning acceptance as a
+ lie. And they furthermore stated their belief that he was not dead, and
+ instanced the strong circumstantial evidence of his own word that he was
+ dead&mdash;and beseeched the coroner to delay the funeral as long as
+ possible, which was done. And so in the tropical climate of Lahaina the
+ coffin stood open for seven days, and then even the loyal jury gave him
+ up. But they sat on him again, and changed their verdict to "suicide
+ induced by mental aberration"&mdash;because, said they, with penetration,
+ "he said he was dead, and he was dead; and would he have told the truth if
+ he had been in his right mind? No, sir."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link557" id="link557"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="557.jpg (26K)" src="images/557.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkch78" id="linkch78"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXXIII.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ After half a year's luxurious vagrancy in the islands, I took shipping in
+ a sailing vessel, and regretfully returned to San Francisco&mdash;a voyage
+ in every way delightful, but without an incident: unless lying two long
+ weeks in a dead calm, eighteen hundred miles from the nearest land, may
+ rank as an incident. Schools of whales grew so tame that day after day
+ they played about the ship among the porpoises and the sharks without the
+ least apparent fear of us, and we pelted them with empty bottles for lack
+ of better sport. Twenty-four hours afterward these bottles would be still
+ lying on the glassy water under our noses, showing that the ship had not
+ moved out of her place in all that time. The calm was absolutely
+ breathless, and the surface of the sea absolutely without a wrinkle. For a
+ whole day and part of a night we lay so close to another ship that had
+ drifted to our vicinity, that we carried on conversations with her
+ passengers, introduced each other by name, and became pretty intimately
+ acquainted with people we had never heard of before, and have never heard
+ of since. This was the only vessel we saw during the whole lonely voyage.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link559" id="link559"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="559.jpg (91K)" src="images/559.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ We had fifteen passengers, and to show how hard pressed they were at last
+ for occupation and amusement, I will mention that the gentlemen gave a
+ good part of their time every day, during the calm, to trying to sit on an
+ empty champagne bottle (lying on its side), and thread a needle without
+ touching their heels to the deck, or falling over; and the ladies sat in
+ the shade of the mainsail, and watched the enterprise with absorbing
+ interest. We were at sea five Sundays; and yet, but for the almanac, we
+ never would have known but that all the other days were Sundays too.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I was home again, in San Francisco, without means and without employment.
+ I tortured my brain for a saving scheme of some kind, and at last a public
+ lecture occurred to me! I sat down and wrote one, in a fever of hopeful
+ anticipation. I showed it to several friends, but they all shook their
+ heads. They said nobody would come to hear me, and I would make a
+ humiliating failure of it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ They said that as I had never spoken in public, I would break down in the
+ delivery, anyhow. I was disconsolate now. But at last an editor slapped me
+ on the back and told me to "go ahead." He said, "Take the largest house in
+ town, and charge a dollar a ticket." The audacity of the proposition was
+ charming; it seemed fraught with practical worldly wisdom, however. The
+ proprietor of the several theatres endorsed the advice, and said I might
+ have his handsome new opera-house at half price&mdash;fifty dollars. In
+ sheer desperation I took it&mdash;on credit, for sufficient reasons. In
+ three days I did a hundred and fifty dollars' worth of printing and
+ advertising, and was the most distressed and frightened creature on the
+ Pacific coast. I could not sleep&mdash;who could, under such
+ circumstances? For other people there was facetiousness in the last line
+ of my posters, but to me it was plaintive with a pang when I wrote it:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Doors open at 7 1/2. The trouble will begin at 8."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ That line has done good service since. Showmen have borrowed it
+ frequently. I have even seen it appended to a newspaper advertisement
+ reminding school pupils in vacation what time next term would begin. As
+ those three days of suspense dragged by, I grew more and more unhappy. I
+ had sold two hundred tickets among my personal friends, but I feared they
+ might not come. My lecture, which had seemed "humorous" to me, at first,
+ grew steadily more and more dreary, till not a vestige of fun seemed left,
+ and I grieved that I could not bring a coffin on the stage and turn the
+ thing into a funeral. I was so panic-stricken, at last, that I went to
+ three old friends, giants in stature, cordial by nature, and
+ stormy-voiced, and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "This thing is going to be a failure; the jokes in it are so dim that
+ nobody will ever see them; I would like to have you sit in the parquette,
+ and help me through."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ They said they would. Then I went to the wife of a popular citizen, and
+ said that if she was willing to do me a very great kindness, I would be
+ glad if she and her husband would sit prominently in the left-hand stage-
+ box, where the whole house could see them. I explained that I should need
+ help, and would turn toward her and smile, as a signal, when I had been
+ delivered of an obscure joke&mdash;"and then," I added, "don't wait to
+ investigate, but respond!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ She promised. Down the street I met a man I never had seen before. He had
+ been drinking, and was beaming with smiles and good nature. He said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "My name's Sawyer. You don't know me, but that don't matter. I haven't got
+ a cent, but if you knew how bad I wanted to laugh, you'd give me a ticket.
+ Come, now, what do you say?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Is your laugh hung on a hair-trigger?&mdash;that is, is it critical, or
+ can you get it off easy?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ My drawling infirmity of speech so affected him that he laughed a specimen
+ or two that struck me as being about the article I wanted, and I gave him
+ a ticket, and appointed him to sit in the second circle, in the centre,
+ and be responsible for that division of the house. I gave him minute
+ instructions about how to detect indistinct jokes, and then went away, and
+ left him chuckling placidly over the novelty of the idea.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I ate nothing on the last of the three eventful days&mdash;I only
+ suffered. I had advertised that on this third day the box-office would be
+ opened for the sale of reserved seats. I crept down to the theater at four
+ in the afternoon to see if any sales had been made. The ticket seller was
+ gone, the box-office was locked up. I had to swallow suddenly, or my heart
+ would have got out. "No sales," I said to myself; "I might have known it."
+ I thought of suicide, pretended illness, flight. I thought of these things
+ in earnest, for I was very miserable and scared. But of course I had to
+ drive them away, and prepare to meet my fate. I could not wait for
+ half-past seven&mdash;I wanted to face the horror, and end it&mdash;the
+ feeling of many a man doomed to hang, no doubt. I went down back streets
+ at six o'clock, and entered the theatre by the back door. I stumbled my
+ way in the dark among the ranks of canvas scenery, and stood on the stage.
+ The house was gloomy and silent, and its emptiness depressing. I went into
+ the dark among the scenes again, and for an hour and a half gave myself up
+ to the horrors, wholly unconscious of everything else. Then I heard a
+ murmur; it rose higher and higher, and ended in a crash, mingled with
+ cheers. It made my hair raise, it was so close to me, and so loud.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ There was a pause, and then another; presently came a third, and before I
+ well knew what I was about, I was in the middle of the stage, staring at a
+ sea of faces, bewildered by the fierce glare of the lights, and quaking in
+ every limb with a terror that seemed like to take my life away. The house
+ was full, aisles and all!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link561" id="link561"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="561.jpg (45K)" src="images/561.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The tumult in my heart and brain and legs continued a full minute before I
+ could gain any command over myself. Then I recognized the charity and the
+ friendliness in the faces before me, and little by little my fright melted
+ away, and I began to talk Within three or four minutes I was comfortable,
+ and even content. My three chief allies, with three auxiliaries, were on
+ hand, in the parquette, all sitting together, all armed with bludgeons,
+ and all ready to make an onslaught upon the feeblest joke that might show
+ its head. And whenever a joke did fall, their bludgeons came down and
+ their faces seemed to split from ear to ear.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link562" id="link562"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="562.jpg (153K)" src="images/562.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Sawyer, whose hearty countenance was seen looming redly in the centre of
+ the second circle, took it up, and the house was carried handsomely.
+ Inferior jokes never fared so royally before. Presently I delivered a bit
+ of serious matter with impressive unction (it was my pet), and the
+ audience listened with an absorbed hush that gratified me more than any
+ applause; and as I dropped the last word of the clause, I happened to turn
+ and catch Mrs.&mdash;'s intent and waiting eye; my conversation with her
+ flashed upon me, and in spite of all I could do I smiled. She took it for
+ the signal, and promptly delivered a mellow laugh that touched off the
+ whole audience; and the explosion that followed was the triumph of the
+ evening. I thought that that honest man Sawyer would choke himself; and as
+ for the bludgeons, they performed like pile-drivers. But my poor little
+ morsel of pathos was ruined. It was taken in good faith as an intentional
+ joke, and the prize one of the entertainment, and I wisely let it go at
+ that.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ All the papers were kind in the morning; my appetite returned; I had a
+ abundance of money. All's well that ends well.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <a name="linkch79" id="linkch79"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ CHAPTER LXXIX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I launched out as a lecturer, now, with great boldness. I had the field
+ all to myself, for public lectures were almost an unknown commodity in the
+ Pacific market. They are not so rare, now, I suppose. I took an old
+ personal friend along to play agent for me, and for two or three weeks we
+ roamed through Nevada and California and had a very cheerful time of it.
+ Two days before I lectured in Virginia City, two stagecoaches were robbed
+ within two miles of the town. The daring act was committed just at dawn,
+ by six masked men, who sprang up alongside the coaches, presented
+ revolvers at the heads of the drivers and passengers, and commanded a
+ general dismount. Everybody climbed down, and the robbers took their
+ watches and every cent they had. Then they took gunpowder and blew up the
+ express specie boxes and got their contents. The leader of the robbers was
+ a small, quick-spoken man, and the fame of his vigorous manner and his
+ intrepidity was in everybody's mouth when we arrived.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The night after instructing Virginia, I walked over the desolate "divide"
+ and down to Gold Hill, and lectured there. The lecture done, I stopped to
+ talk with a friend, and did not start back till eleven. The "divide" was
+ high, unoccupied ground, between the towns, the scene of twenty midnight
+ murders and a hundred robberies. As we climbed up and stepped out on this
+ eminence, the Gold Hill lights dropped out of sight at our backs, and the
+ night closed down gloomy and dismal. A sharp wind swept the place, too,
+ and chilled our perspiring bodies through.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I tell you I don't like this place at night," said Mike the agent.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, don't speak so loud," I said. "You needn't remind anybody that we
+ are here."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Just then a dim figure approached me from the direction of Virginia&mdash;a
+ man, evidently. He came straight at me, and I stepped aside to let him
+ pass; he stepped in the way and confronted me again. Then I saw that he
+ had a mask on and was holding something in my face&mdash;I heard a
+ click-click and recognized a revolver in dim outline. I pushed the barrel
+ aside with my hand and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Don't!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He ejaculated sharply:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Your watch! Your money!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You can have them with pleasure&mdash;but take the pistol away from my
+ face, please. It makes me shiver."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No remarks! Hand out your money!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Certainly&mdash;I&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Put up your hands! Don't you go for a weapon! Put 'em up! Higher!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I held them above my head.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ A pause. Then:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Are you going to hand out your money or not?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I dropped my hands to my pockets and said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Certainly! I&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Put up your hands! Do you want your head blown off? Higher!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I put them above my head again.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Another pause.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Are you going to hand out your money or not? Ah-ah&mdash;again? Put up
+ your hands! By George, you want the head shot off you awful bad!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, friend, I'm trying my best to please you. You tell me to give up my
+ money, and when I reach for it you tell me to put up my hands. If you
+ would only&mdash;. Oh, now&mdash;don't! All six of you at me! That other
+ man will get away while.&mdash;Now please take some of those revolvers out
+ of my face&mdash;do, if you please! Every time one of them clicks, my
+ liver comes up into my throat! If you have a mother&mdash;any of you&mdash;or
+ if any of you have ever had a mother&mdash;or a&mdash;grandmother&mdash;or
+ a&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Cheese it! Will you give up your money, or have we got to&mdash;. There&mdash;there&mdash;none
+ of that! Put up your hands!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gentlemen&mdash;I know you are gentlemen by your&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Silence! If you want to be facetious, young man, there are times and
+ places more fitting. This is a serious business."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You prick the marrow of my opinion. The funerals I have attended in my
+ time were comedies compared to it. Now I think&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Curse your palaver! Your money!&mdash;your money!&mdash;your money! Hold!&mdash;put
+ up your hands!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gentlemen, listen to reason. You see how I am situated&mdash;now don't
+ put those pistols so close&mdash;I smell the powder.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You see how I am situated. If I had four hands&mdash;so that I could hold
+ up two and&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Throttle him! Gag him! Kill him!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gentlemen, don't! Nobody's watching the other fellow. Why don't some of
+ you&mdash;. Ouch! Take it away, please!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Gentlemen, you see that I've got to hold up my hands; and so I can't take
+ out my money&mdash;but if you'll be so kind as to take it out for me, I
+ will do as much for you some&mdash;"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Search him Beauregard&mdash;and stop his jaw with a bullet, quick, if he
+ wags it again. Help Beauregard, Stonewall."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then three of them, with the small, spry leader, adjourned to Mike and
+ fell to searching him. I was so excited that my lawless fancy tortured me
+ to ask my two men all manner of facetious questions about their rebel
+ brother-generals of the South, but, considering the order they had
+ received, it was but common prudence to keep still. When everything had
+ been taken from me,&mdash;watch, money, and a multitude of trifles of
+ small value,&mdash;I supposed I was free, and forthwith put my cold hands
+ into my empty pockets and began an inoffensive jig to warm my feet and
+ stir up some latent courage&mdash;but instantly all pistols were at my
+ head, and the order came again:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link567" id="link567"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="567.jpg (72K)" src="images/567.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ They stood Mike up alongside of me, with strict orders to keep his hands
+ above his head, too, and then the chief highwayman said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Beauregard, hide behind that boulder; Phil Sheridan, you hide behind that
+ other one; Stonewall Jackson, put yourself behind that sage-bush there.
+ Keep your pistols bearing on these fellows, and if they take down their
+ hands within ten minutes, or move a single peg, let them have it!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Then three disappeared in the gloom toward the several ambushes, and the
+ other three disappeared down the road toward Virginia.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It was depressingly still, and miserably cold. Now this whole thing was a
+ practical joke, and the robbers were personal friends of ours in disguise,
+ and twenty more lay hidden within ten feet of us during the whole
+ operation, listening. Mike knew all this, and was in the joke, but I
+ suspected nothing of it. To me it was most uncomfortably genuine. When we
+ had stood there in the middle of the road five minutes, like a couple of
+ idiots, with our hands aloft, freezing to death by inches, Mike's interest
+ in the joke began to wane. He said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "The time's up, now, aint it?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No, you keep still. Do you want to take any chances with these bloody
+ savages?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Presently Mike said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Now the time's up, anyway. I'm freezing."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well freeze. Better freeze than carry your brains home in a basket. Maybe
+ the time is up, but how do we know?&mdash;got no watch to tell by. I mean
+ to give them good measure. I calculate to stand here fifteen minutes or
+ die. Don't you move."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ So, without knowing it, I was making one joker very sick of his contract.
+ When we took our arms down at last, they were aching with cold and
+ fatigue, and when we went sneaking off, the dread I was in that the time
+ might not yet be up and that we would feel bullets in a moment, was not
+ sufficient to draw all my attention from the misery that racked my
+ stiffened body.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The joke of these highwayman friends of ours was mainly a joke upon
+ themselves; for they had waited for me on the cold hill-top two full hours
+ before I came, and there was very little fun in that; they were so chilled
+ that it took them a couple of weeks to get warm again. Moreover, I never
+ had a thought that they would kill me to get money which it was so
+ perfectly easy to get without any such folly, and so they did not really
+ frighten me bad enough to make their enjoyment worth the trouble they had
+ taken. I was only afraid that their weapons would go off accidentally.
+ Their very numbers inspired me with confidence that no blood would be
+ intentionally spilled. They were not smart; they ought to have sent only
+ one highwayman, with a double-barrelled shot gun, if they desired to see
+ the author of this volume climb a tree.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ However, I suppose that in the long run I got the largest share of the
+ joke at last; and in a shape not foreseen by the highwaymen; for the
+ chilly exposure on the "divide" while I was in a perspiration gave me a
+ cold which developed itself into a troublesome disease and kept my hands
+ idle some three months, besides costing me quite a sum in doctor's bills.
+ Since then I play no practical jokes on people and generally lose my
+ temper when one is played upon me.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link569" id="link569"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="569.jpg (39K)" src="images/569.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When I returned to San Francisco I projected a pleasure journey to Japan
+ and thence westward around the world; but a desire to see home again
+ changed my mind, and I took a berth in the steamship, bade good-bye to the
+ friendliest land and livest, heartiest community on our continent, and
+ came by the way of the Isthmus to New York&mdash;a trip that was not much
+ of a pic-nic excursion, for the cholera broke out among us on the passage
+ and we buried two or three bodies at sea every day. I found home a dreary
+ place after my long absence; for half the children I had known were now
+ wearing whiskers or waterfalls, and few of the grown people I had been
+ acquainted with remained at their hearthstones prosperous and happy&mdash;some
+ of them had wandered to other scenes, some were in jail, and the rest had
+ been hanged. These changes touched me deeply, and I went away and joined
+ the famous Quaker City European Excursion and carried my tears to foreign
+ lands.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Thus, after seven years of vicissitudes, ended a "pleasure trip" to the
+ silver mines of Nevada which had originally been intended to occupy only
+ three months. However, I usually miss my calculations further than that.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ MORAL.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ If the reader thinks he is done, now, and that this book has no moral to
+ it, he is in error. The moral of it is this: If you are of any account,
+ stay at home and make your way by faithful diligence; but if you are "no
+ account," go away from home, and then you will have to work, whether you
+ want to or not. Thus you become a blessing to your friends by ceasing to
+ be a nuisance to them&mdash;if the people you go among suffer by the
+ operation.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <a name="link570" id="link570"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <div class="fig" style="width:80%;">
+ <img alt="570.jpg (75K)" src="images/570.jpg" width="100%" /><br />
+ </div>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <a name="linkAPPENDIX" id="linkAPPENDIX"></a> <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <h2>
+ APPENDIX.
+ </h2>
+ <p>
+ <br />
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ APPENDIX. A.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ BRIEF SKETCH OF MORMON HISTORY.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Mormonism is only about forty years old, but its career has been full of
+ stir and adventure from the beginning, and is likely to remain so to the
+ end. Its adherents have been hunted and hounded from one end of the
+ country to the other, and the result is that for years they have hated all
+ "Gentiles" indiscriminately and with all their might. Joseph Smith, the
+ finder of the Book of Mormon and founder of the religion, was driven from
+ State to State with his mysterious copperplates and the miraculous stones
+ he read their inscriptions with. Finally he instituted his "church" in
+ Ohio and Brigham Young joined it. The neighbors began to persecute, and
+ apostasy commenced. Brigham held to the faith and worked hard. He arrested
+ desertion. He did more&mdash;he added converts in the midst of the
+ trouble. He rose in favor and importance with the brethren. He was made
+ one of the Twelve Apostles of the Church. He shortly fought his way to a
+ higher post and a more powerful&mdash;President of the Twelve. The
+ neighbors rose up and drove the Mormons out of Ohio, and they settled in
+ Missouri. Brigham went with them. The Missourians drove them out and they
+ retreated to Nauvoo, Illinois. They prospered there, and built a temple
+ which made some pretensions to architectural grace and achieved some
+ celebrity in a section of country where a brick court-house with a tin
+ dome and a cupola on it was contemplated with reverential awe. But the
+ Mormons were badgered and harried again by their neighbors. All the
+ proclamations Joseph Smith could issue denouncing polygamy and repudiating
+ it as utterly anti-Mormon were of no avail; the people of the
+ neighborhood, on both sides of the Mississippi, claimed that polygamy was
+ practised by the Mormons, and not only polygamy but a little of everything
+ that was bad. Brigham returned from a mission to England, where he had
+ established a Mormon newspaper, and he brought back with him several
+ hundred converts to his preaching. His influence among the brethren
+ augmented with every move he made. Finally Nauvoo was invaded by the
+ Missouri and Illinois Gentiles, and Joseph Smith killed. A Mormon named
+ Rigdon assumed the Presidency of the Mormon church and government, in
+ Smith's place, and even tried his hand at a prophecy or two. But a greater
+ than he was at hand. Brigham seized the advantage of the hour and without
+ other authority than superior brain and nerve and will, hurled Rigdon from
+ his high place and occupied it himself. He did more. He launched an
+ elaborate curse at Rigdon and his disciples; and he pronounced Rigdon's
+ "prophecies" emanations from the devil, and ended by "handing the false
+ prophet over to the buffetings of Satan for a thousand years"&mdash;probably
+ the longest term ever inflicted in Illinois. The people recognized their
+ master. They straightway elected Brigham Young President, by a prodigious
+ majority, and have never faltered in their devotion to him from that day
+ to this. Brigham had forecast&mdash;a quality which no other prominent
+ Mormon has probably ever possessed. He recognized that it was better to
+ move to the wilderness than be moved. By his command the people gathered
+ together their meagre effects, turned their backs upon their homes, and
+ their faces toward the wilderness, and on a bitter night in February filed
+ in sorrowful procession across the frozen Mississippi, lighted on their
+ way by the glare from their burning temple, whose sacred furniture their
+ own hands had fired! They camped, several days afterward, on the western
+ verge of Iowa, and poverty, want, hunger, cold, sickness, grief and
+ persecution did their work, and many succumbed and died&mdash;martyrs,
+ fair and true, whatever else they might have been. Two years the remnant
+ remained there, while Brigham and a small party crossed the country and
+ founded Great Salt Lake City, purposely choosing a land which was outside
+ the ownership and jurisdiction of the hated American nation. Note that.
+ This was in 1847. Brigham moved his people there and got them settled just
+ in time to see disaster fall again. For the war closed and Mexico ceded
+ Brigham's refuge to the enemy&mdash;the United States! In 1849 the Mormons
+ organized a "free and independent" government and erected the "State of
+ Deseret," with Brigham Young as its head. But the very next year Congress
+ deliberately snubbed it and created the "Territory of Utah" out of the
+ same accumulation of mountains, sage-brush, alkali and general desolation,&mdash;but
+ made Brigham Governor of it. Then for years the enormous migration across
+ the plains to California poured through the land of the Mormons and yet
+ the church remained staunch and true to its lord and master. Neither
+ hunger, thirst, poverty, grief, hatred, contempt, nor persecution could
+ drive the Mormons from their faith or their allegiance; and even the
+ thirst for gold, which gleaned the flower of the youth and strength of
+ many nations was not able to entice them! That was the final test. An
+ experiment that could survive that was an experiment with some substance
+ to it somewhere.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Great Salt Lake City throve finely, and so did Utah. One of the last
+ things which Brigham Young had done before leaving Iowa, was to appear in
+ the pulpit dressed to personate the worshipped and lamented prophet Smith,
+ and confer the prophetic succession, with all its dignities, emoluments
+ and authorities, upon "President Brigham Young!" The people accepted the
+ pious fraud with the maddest enthusiasm, and Brigham's power was sealed
+ and secured for all time. Within five years afterward he openly added
+ polygamy to the tenets of the church by authority of a "revelation" which
+ he pretended had been received nine years before by Joseph Smith, albeit
+ Joseph is amply on record as denouncing polygamy to the day of his death.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Now was Brigham become a second Andrew Johnson in the small beginning and
+ steady progress of his official grandeur. He had served successively as a
+ disciple in the ranks; home missionary; foreign missionary; editor and
+ publisher; Apostle; President of the Board of Apostles; President of all
+ Mormondom, civil and ecclesiastical; successor to the great Joseph by the
+ will of heaven; "prophet," "seer," "revelator." There was but one dignity
+ higher which he could aspire to, and he reached out modestly and took that&mdash;he
+ proclaimed himself a God!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He claims that he is to have a heaven of his own hereafter, and that he
+ will be its God, and his wives and children its goddesses, princes and
+ princesses. Into it all faithful Mormons will be admitted, with their
+ families, and will take rank and consequence according to the number of
+ their wives and children. If a disciple dies before he has had time to
+ accumulate enough wives and children to enable him to be respectable in
+ the next world any friend can marry a few wives and raise a few children
+ for him after he is dead, and they are duly credited to his account and
+ his heavenly status advanced accordingly.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Let it be borne in mind that the majority of the Mormons have always been
+ ignorant, simple, of an inferior order of intellect, unacquainted with the
+ world and its ways; and let it be borne in mind that the wives of these
+ Mormons are necessarily after the same pattern and their children likely
+ to be fit representatives of such a conjunction; and then let it be
+ remembered that for forty years these creatures have been driven, driven,
+ driven, relentlessly! and mobbed, beaten, and shot down; cursed, despised,
+ expatriated; banished to a remote desert, whither they journeyed gaunt
+ with famine and disease, disturbing the ancient solitudes with their
+ lamentations and marking the long way with graves of their dead&mdash;and
+ all because they were simply trying to live and worship God in the way
+ which they believed with all their hearts and souls to be the true one.
+ Let all these things be borne in mind, and then it will not be hard to
+ account for the deathless hatred which the Mormons bear our people and our
+ government.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ That hatred has "fed fat its ancient grudge" ever since Mormon Utah
+ developed into a self-supporting realm and the church waxed rich and
+ strong. Brigham as Territorial Governor made it plain that Mormondom was
+ for the Mormons. The United States tried to rectify all that by appointing
+ territorial officers from New England and other anti-Mormon localities,
+ but Brigham prepared to make their entrance into his dominions difficult.
+ Three thousand United States troops had to go across the plains and put
+ these gentlemen in office. And after they were in office they were as
+ helpless as so many stone images. They made laws which nobody minded and
+ which could not be executed. The federal judges opened court in a land
+ filled with crime and violence and sat as holiday spectacles for insolent
+ crowds to gape at&mdash;for there was nothing to try, nothing to do
+ nothing on the dockets! And if a Gentile brought a suit, the Mormon jury
+ would do just as it pleased about bringing in a verdict, and when the
+ judgment of the court was rendered no Mormon cared for it and no officer
+ could execute it. Our Presidents shipped one cargo of officials after
+ another to Utah, but the result was always the same&mdash;they sat in a
+ blight for awhile they fairly feasted on scowls and insults day by day,
+ they saw every attempt to do their official duties find its reward in
+ darker and darker looks, and in secret threats and warnings of a more and
+ more dismal nature&mdash;and at last they either succumbed and became
+ despised tools and toys of the Mormons, or got scared and discomforted
+ beyond all endurance and left the Territory. If a brave officer kept on
+ courageously till his pluck was proven, some pliant Buchanan or Pierce
+ would remove him and appoint a stick in his place. In 1857 General Harney
+ came very near being appointed Governor of Utah. And so it came very near
+ being Harney governor and Cradlebaugh judge!&mdash;two men who never had
+ any idea of fear further than the sort of murky comprehension of it which
+ they were enabled to gather from the dictionary. Simply (if for nothing
+ else) for the variety they would have made in a rather monotonous history
+ of Federal servility and helplessness, it is a pity they were not fated to
+ hold office together in Utah.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Up to the date of our visit to Utah, such had been the Territorial record.
+ The Territorial government established there had been a hopeless failure,
+ and Brigham Young was the only real power in the land. He was an absolute
+ monarch&mdash;a monarch who defied our President&mdash;a monarch who
+ laughed at our armies when they camped about his capital&mdash;a monarch
+ who received without emotion the news that the august Congress of the
+ United States had enacted a solemn law against polygamy, and then went
+ forth calmly and married twenty-five or thirty more wives.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ B. THE MOUNTAIN MEADOWS MASSACRE.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The persecutions which the Mormons suffered so long&mdash;and which they
+ consider they still suffer in not being allowed to govern themselves&mdash;they
+ have endeavored and are still endeavoring to repay. The now almost
+ forgotten "Mountain Meadows massacre" was their work. It was very famous
+ in its day. The whole United States rang with its horrors. A few items
+ will refresh the reader's memory. A great emigrant train from Missouri and
+ Arkansas passed through Salt Lake City and a few disaffected Mormons
+ joined it for the sake of the strong protection it afforded for their
+ escape. In that matter lay sufficient cause for hot retaliation by the
+ Mormon chiefs. Besides, these one hundred and forty-five or one hundred
+ and fifty unsuspecting emigrants being in part from Arkansas, where a
+ noted Mormon missionary had lately been killed, and in part from Missouri,
+ a State remembered with execrations as a bitter persecutor of the saints
+ when they were few and poor and friendless, here were substantial
+ additional grounds for lack of love for these wayfarers. And finally, this
+ train was rich, very rich in cattle, horses, mules and other property&mdash;and
+ how could the Mormons consistently keep up their coveted resemblance to
+ the Israelitish tribes and not seize the "spoil" of an enemy when the Lord
+ had so manifestly "delivered it into their hand?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Wherefore, according to Mrs. C. V. Waite's entertaining book, "The Mormon
+ Prophet," it transpired that&mdash;
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "A 'revelation' from Brigham Young, as Great Grand Archee or God, was
+ dispatched to President J. C. Haight, Bishop Higbee and J. D. Lee (adopted
+ son of Brigham), commanding them to raise all the forces they could muster
+ and trust, follow those cursed Gentiles (so read the revelation), attack
+ them disguised as Indians, and with the arrows of the Almighty make a
+ clean sweep of them, and leave none to tell the tale; and if they needed
+ any assistance they were commanded to hire the Indians as their allies,
+ promising them a share of the booty. They were to be neither slothful nor
+ negligent in their duty, and to be punctual in sending the teams back to
+ him before winter set in, for this was the mandate of Almighty God."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The command of the "revelation" was faithfully obeyed. A large party of
+ Mormons, painted and tricked out as Indians, overtook the train of
+ emigrant wagons some three hundred miles south of Salt Lake City, and made
+ an attack. But the emigrants threw up earthworks, made fortresses of their
+ wagons and defended themselves gallantly and successfully for five days!
+ Your Missouri or Arkansas gentleman is not much afraid of the sort of
+ scurvy apologies for "Indians" which the southern part of Utah affords. He
+ would stand up and fight five hundred of them.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ At the end of the five days the Mormons tried military strategy. They
+ retired to the upper end of the "Meadows," resumed civilized apparel,
+ washed off their paint, and then, heavily armed, drove down in wagons to
+ the beleaguered emigrants, bearing a flag of truce! When the emigrants saw
+ white men coming they threw down their guns and welcomed them with cheer
+ after cheer! And, all unconscious of the poetry of it, no doubt, they
+ lifted a little child aloft, dressed in white, in answer to the flag of
+ truce!
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The leaders of the timely white "deliverers" were President Haight and
+ Bishop John D. Lee, of the Mormon Church. Mr. Cradlebaugh, who served a
+ term as a Federal Judge in Utah and afterward was sent to Congress from
+ Nevada, tells in a speech delivered in Congress how these leaders next
+ proceeded:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "They professed to be on good terms with the Indians, and represented them
+ as being very mad. They also proposed to intercede and settle the matter
+ with the Indians. After several hours parley they, having (apparently)
+ visited the Indians, gave the ultimatum of the savages; which was, that
+ the emigrants should march out of their camp, leaving everything behind
+ them, even their guns. It was promised by the Mormon bishops that they
+ would bring a force and guard the emigrants back to the settlements. The
+ terms were agreed to, the emigrants being desirous of saving the lives of
+ their families. The Mormons retired, and subsequently appeared with thirty
+ or forty armed men. The emigrants were marched out, the women and children
+ in front and the men behind, the Mormon guard being in the rear. When they
+ had marched in this way about a mile, at a given signal the slaughter
+ commenced. The men were almost all shot down at the first fire from the
+ guard. Two only escaped, who fled to the desert, and were followed one
+ hundred and fifty miles before they were overtaken and slaughtered. The
+ women and children ran on, two or three hundred yards further, when they
+ were overtaken and with the aid of the Indians they were slaughtered.
+ Seventeen individuals only, of all the emigrant party, were spared, and
+ they were little children, the eldest of them being only seven years old.
+ Thus, on the 10th day of September, 1857, was consummated one of the most
+ cruel, cowardly and bloody murders known in our history."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The number of persons butchered by the Mormons on this occasion was one
+ hundred and twenty.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ With unheard-of temerity Judge Cradlebaugh opened his court and proceeded
+ to make Mormondom answer for the massacre. And what a spectacle it must
+ have been to see this grim veteran, solitary and alone in his pride and
+ his pluck, glowering down on his Mormon jury and Mormon auditory, deriding
+ them by turns, and by turns "breathing threatenings and slaughter!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ An editorial in the Territorial Enterprise of that day says of him and of
+ the occasion:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "He spoke and acted with the fearlessness and resolution of a Jackson; but
+ the jury failed to indict, or even report on the charges, while threats of
+ violence were heard in every quarter, and an attack on the U.S. troops
+ intimated, if he persisted in his course.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Finding that nothing could be done with the juries, they were discharged
+ with a scathing rebuke from the judge. And then, sitting as a committing
+ magistrate, he commenced his task alone. He examined witnesses, made
+ arrests in every quarter, and created a consternation in the camps of the
+ saints greater than any they had ever witnessed before, since Mormondom
+ was born. At last accounts terrified elders and bishops were decamping to
+ save their necks; and developments of the most starling character were
+ being made, implicating the highest Church dignitaries in the many murders
+ and robberies committed upon the Gentiles during the past eight years."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Had Harney been Governor, Cradlebaugh would have been supported in his
+ work, and the absolute proofs adduced by him of Mormon guilt in this
+ massacre and in a number of previous murders, would have conferred
+ gratuitous coffins upon certain citizens, together with occasion to use
+ them. But Cumming was the Federal Governor, and he, under a curious
+ pretense of impartiality, sought to screen the Mormons from the demands of
+ justice. On one occasion he even went so far as to publish his protest
+ against the use of the U.S. troops in aid of Cradlebaugh's proceedings.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Mrs. C. V. Waite closes her interesting detail of the great massacre with
+ the following remark and accompanying summary of the testimony&mdash;and
+ the summary is concise, accurate and reliable:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "For the benefit of those who may still be disposed to doubt the guilt of
+ Young and his Mormons in this transaction, the testimony is here collated
+ and circumstances given which go not merely to implicate but to fasten
+ conviction upon them by 'confirmations strong as proofs of Holy Writ:'
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "1. The evidence of Mormons themselves, engaged in the affair, as shown by
+ the statements of Judge Cradlebaugh and Deputy U.S. Marshall Rodgers.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "2. The failure of Brigham Young to embody any account of it in his Report
+ as Superintendent of Indian Affairs. Also his failure to make any allusion
+ to it whatever from the pulpit, until several years after the occurrence
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "3. The flight to the mountains of men high in authority in the Mormon
+ Church and State, when this affair was brought to the ordeal of a judicial
+ investigation.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "4. The failure of the Deseret News, the Church organ, and the only paper
+ then published in the Territory, to notice the massacre until several
+ months afterward, and then only to deny that Mormons were engaged in it.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "5. The testimony of the children saved from the massacre.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "6. The children and the property of the emigrants found in possession of
+ the Mormons, and that possession traced back to the very day after the
+ massacre.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "7. The statements of Indians in the neighborhood of the scene of the
+ massacre: these statements are shown, not only by Cradlebaugh and Rodgers,
+ but by a number of military officers, and by J. Forney, who was, in 1859,
+ Superintendent of Indian Affairs for the Territory. To all these were such
+ statements freely and frequently made by the Indians.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "8. The testimony of R. P. Campbell, Capt. 2d Dragoons, who was sent in
+ the Spring of 1859 to Santa Clara, to protect travelers on the road to
+ California and to inquire into Indian depredations."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ C. CONCERNING A FRIGHTFUL ASSASSINATION THAT WAS NEVER CONSUMMATED
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ If ever there was a harmless man, it is Conrad Wiegand, of Gold Hill,
+ Nevada. If ever there was a gentle spirit that thought itself unfired
+ gunpowder and latent ruin, it is Conrad Wiegand. If ever there was an
+ oyster that fancied itself a whale; or a jack-o'lantern, confined to a
+ swamp, that fancied itself a planet with a billion-mile orbit; or a summer
+ zephyr that deemed itself a hurricane, it is Conrad Wiegand. Therefore,
+ what wonder is it that when he says a thing, he thinks the world listens;
+ that when he does a thing the world stands still to look; and that when he
+ suffers, there is a convulsion of nature? When I met Conrad, he was
+ "Superintendent of the Gold Hill Assay Office"&mdash;and he was not only
+ its Superintendent, but its entire force. And he was a street preacher,
+ too, with a mongrel religion of his own invention, whereby he expected to
+ regenerate the universe. This was years ago. Here latterly he has entered
+ journalism; and his journalism is what it might be expected to be:
+ colossal to ear, but pigmy to the eye. It is extravagant grandiloquence
+ confined to a newspaper about the size of a double letter sheet. He
+ doubtless edits, sets the type, and prints his paper, all alone; but he
+ delights to speak of the concern as if it occupies a block and employs a
+ thousand men.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ [Something less than two years ago, Conrad assailed several people
+ mercilessly in his little "People's Tribune," and got himself into
+ trouble. Straightway he airs the affair in the "Territorial Enterprise,"
+ in a communication over his own signature, and I propose to reproduce it
+ here, in all its native simplicity and more than human candor. Long as it
+ is, it is well worth reading, for it is the richest specimen of
+ journalistic literature the history of America can furnish, perhaps:]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ From the Territorial Enterprise, Jan. 20, 1870.
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <h4>
+ SEEMING PLOT FOR ASSASSINATION MISCARRIED.
+ </h4>
+ <p>
+ TO THE EDITOR OF THE ENTERPRISE: Months ago, when Mr. Sutro incidentally
+ exposed mining management on the Comstock, and among others roused me to
+ protest against its continuance, in great kindness you warned me that
+ any attempt by publications, by public meetings and by legislative
+ action, aimed at the correction of chronic mining evils in Storey
+ County, must entail upon me (a) business ruin, (b) the burden of all its
+ costs, (c) personal violence, and if my purpose were persisted in, then
+ (d) assassination, and after all nothing would be effected.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ YOUR PROPHECY FULFILLING. In large part at least your prophecies have
+ been fulfilled, for (a) assaying, which was well attended to in the Gold
+ Hill Assay Office (of which I am superintendent), in consequence of my
+ publications, has been taken elsewhere, so the President of one of the
+ companies assures me. With no reason assigned, other work has been taken
+ away. With but one or two important exceptions, our assay business now
+ consists simply of the gleanings of the vicinity. (b) Though my own
+ personal donations to the People's Tribune Association have already
+ exceeded $1,500, outside of our own numbers we have received (in money)
+ less than $300 as contributions and subscriptions for the journal. (c)
+ On Thursday last, on the main street in Gold Hill, near noon, with
+ neither warning nor cause assigned, by a powerful blow I was felled to
+ the ground, and while down I was kicked by a man who it would seem had
+ been led to believe that I had spoken derogatorily of him. By whom he
+ was so induced to believe I am as yet unable to say. On Saturday last I
+ was again assailed and beaten by a man who first informed me why he did
+ so, and who persisted in making his assault even after the erroneous
+ impression under which he also was at first laboring had been clearly
+ and repeatedly pointed out. This same man, after failing through
+ intimidation to elicit from me the names of our editorial contributors,
+ against giving which he knew me to be pledged, beat himself weary upon
+ me with a raw hide, I not resisting, and then pantingly threatened me
+ with permanent disfiguring mayhem, if ever again I should introduce his
+ name into print, and who but a few minutes before his attack upon me
+ assured me that the only reason I was "permitted" to reach home alive on
+ Wednesday evening last (at which time the PEOPLE'S TRIBUNE was issued)
+ was, that he deems me only half-witted, and be it remembered the very
+ next morning I was knocked down and kicked by a man who seemed to be
+ prepared for flight. [He sees doom impending:]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ WHEN WILL THE CIRCLE JOIN? How long before the whole of your prophecy
+ will be fulfilled I cannot say, but under the shadow of so much
+ fulfillment in so short a time, and with such threats from a man who is
+ one of the most prominent exponents of the San Francisco mining-ring
+ staring me and this whole community defiantly in the face and pointing
+ to a completion of your augury, do you blame me for feeling that this
+ communication is the last I shall ever write for the Press, especially
+ when a sense alike of personal self- respect, of duty to this
+ money-oppressed and fear-ridden community, and of American fealty to the
+ spirit of true Liberty all command me, and each more loudly than love of
+ life itself, to declare the name of that prominent man to be JOHN B.
+ WINTERS, President of the Yellow Jacket Company, a political aspirant
+ and a military General? The name of his partially duped accomplice and
+ abettor in this last marvelous assault, is no other than PHILIP LYNCH,
+ Editor and Proprietor of the Gold Hill News.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Despite the insult and wrong heaped upon me by John B. Winters, on
+ Saturday afternoon, only a glimpse of which I shall be able to afford
+ your readers, so much do I deplore clinching (by publicity) a serious
+ mistake of any one, man or woman, committed under natural and not self-
+ wrought passion, in view of his great apparent excitement at the time
+ and in view of the almost perfect privacy of the assault, I am far from
+ sure that I should not have given him space for repentance before
+ exposing him, were it not that he himself has so far exposed the matter
+ as to make it the common talk of the town that he has horsewhipped me.
+ That fact having been made public, all the facts in connection need to
+ be also, or silence on my part would seem more than singular, and with
+ many would be proof either that I was conscious of some unworthy aim in
+ publishing the article, or else that my "non-combatant" principles are
+ but a convenient cloak alike of physical and moral cowardice. I
+ therefore shall try to present a graphic but truthful picture of this
+ whole affair, but shall forbear all comments, presuming that the editors
+ of our own journal, if others do not, will speak freely and fittingly
+ upon this subject in our next number, whether I shall then be dead or
+ living, for my death will not stop, though it may suspend, the
+ publication of the PEOPLE'S TRIBUNE. [The "non-combatant" sticks to
+ principle, but takes along a friend or two of a conveniently different
+ stripe:]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ THE TRAP SET. On Saturday morning John B. Winters sent verbal word to
+ the Gold Hill Assay Office that he desired to see me at the Yellow
+ Jacket office. Though such a request struck me as decidedly cool in view
+ of his own recent discourtesies to me there alike as a publisher and as
+ a stockholder in the Yellow Jacket mine, and though it seemed to me more
+ like a summons than the courteous request by one gentleman to another
+ for a favor, hoping that some conference with Sharon looking to the
+ betterment of mining matters in Nevada might arise from it, I felt
+ strongly inclined to overlook what possibly was simply an oversight in
+ courtesy. But as then it had only been two days since I had been bruised
+ and beaten under a hasty and false apprehension of facts, my caution was
+ somewhat aroused. Moreover I remembered sensitively his contemptuousness
+ of manner to me at my last interview in his office. I therefore felt it
+ needful, if I went at all, to go accompanied by a friend whom he would
+ not dare to treat with incivility, and whose presence with me might
+ secure exemption from insult. Accordingly I asked a neighbor to
+ accompany me.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ THE TRAP ALMOST DETECTED. Although I was not then aware of this fact, it
+ would seem that previous to my request this same neighbor had heard Dr.
+ Zabriskie state publicly in a saloon, that Mr. Winters had told him he
+ had decided either to kill or to horsewhip me, but had not finally
+ decided on which. My neighbor, therefore, felt unwilling to go down with
+ me until he had first called on Mr. Winters alone. He therefore paid him
+ a visit. From that interview he assured me that he gathered the
+ impression that he did not believe I would have any difficulty with Mr.
+ Winters, and that he (Winters) would call on me at four o'clock in my
+ own office.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ MY OWN PRECAUTIONS. As Sheriff Cummings was in Gold Hill that afternoon,
+ and as I desired to converse with him about the previous assault, I
+ invited him to my office, and he came. Although a half hour had passed
+ beyond four o'clock, Mr. Winters had not called, and we both of us began
+ preparing to go home. Just then, Philip Lynch, Publisher of the Gold
+ Hill News, came in and said, blandly and cheerily, as if bringing good
+ news:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Hello, John B. Winters wants to see you."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I replied, "Indeed! Why he sent me word that he would call on me here
+ this afternoon at four o'clock!"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "O, well, it don't do to be too ceremonious just now, he's in my office,
+ and that will do as well&mdash;come on in, Winters wants to consult with
+ you alone. He's got something to say to you."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Though slightly uneasy at this change of programme, yet believing that
+ in an editor's house I ought to be safe, and anyhow that I would be
+ within hail of the street, I hurriedly, and but partially whispered my
+ dim apprehensions to Mr. Cummings, and asked him if he would not keep
+ near enough to hear my voice in case I should call. He consented to do
+ so while waiting for some other parties, and to come in if he heard my
+ voice or thought I had need of protection.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ On reaching the editorial part of the News office, which viewed from the
+ street is dark, I did not see Mr. Winters, and again my misgivings
+ arose. Had I paused long enough to consider the case, I should have
+ invited Sheriff Cummings in, but as Lynch went down stairs, he said:
+ "This way, Wiegand&mdash;it's best to be private," or some such remark.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ [I do not desire to strain the reader's fancy, hurtfully, and yet it
+ would be a favor to me if he would try to fancy this lamb in battle, or
+ the duelling ground or at the head of a vigilance committee&mdash;M. T.:]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I followed, and without Mr. Cummings, and without arms, which I never do
+ or will carry, unless as a soldier in war, or unless I should yet come
+ to feel I must fight a duel, or to join and aid in the ranks of a
+ necessary Vigilance Committee. But by following I made a fatal mistake.
+ Following was entering a trap, and whatever animal suffers itself to be
+ caught should expect the common fate of a caged rat, as I fear events to
+ come will prove.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Traps commonly are not set for benevolence. [His body-guard is shut out:]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ THE TRAP INSIDE. I followed Lynch down stairs. At their foot a door to
+ the left opened into a small room. From that room another door opened
+ into yet another room, and once entered I found myself inveigled into
+ what many will ever henceforth regard as a private subterranean Gold
+ Hill den, admirably adapted in proper hands to the purposes of murder,
+ raw or disguised, for from it, with both or even one door closed, when
+ too late, I saw that I could not be heard by Sheriff Cummings, and from
+ it, BY VIOLENCE AND BY FORCE, I was prevented from making a peaceable
+ exit, when I thought I saw the studious object of this "consultation"
+ was no other than to compass my killing, in the presence of Philip Lynch
+ as a witness, as soon as by insult a proverbially excitable man should
+ be exasperated to the point of assailing Mr. Winters, so that Mr. Lynch,
+ by his conscience and by his well known tenderness of heart toward the
+ rich and potent would be compelled to testify that he saw Gen. John B.
+ Winters kill Conrad Wiegand in "self-defence." But I am going too fast.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ OUR HOST. Mr. Lynch was present during the most of the time (say a
+ little short of an hour), but three times he left the room. His
+ testimony, therefore, would be available only as to the bulk of what
+ transpired. On entering this carpeted den I was invited to a seat near
+ one corner of the room. Mr. Lynch took a seat near the window. J. B.
+ Winters sat (at first) near the door, and began his remarks essentially
+ as follows:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I have come here to exact of you a retraction, in black and white, of
+ those damnably false charges which you have preferred against me in
+ that-&mdash;infamous lying sheet of yours, and you must declare yourself
+ their author, that you published them knowing them to be false, and that
+ your motives were malicious."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Hold, Mr. Winters. Your language is insulting and your demand an
+ enormity. I trust I was not invited here either to be insulted or
+ coerced. I supposed myself here by invitation of Mr. Lynch, at your
+ request."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Nor did I come here to insult you. I have already told you that I am
+ here for a very different purpose."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Yet your language has been offensive, and even now shows strong
+ excitement. If insult is repeated I shall either leave the room or call
+ in Sheriff Cummings, whom I just left standing and waiting for me
+ outside the door."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No, you won't, sir. You may just as well understand it at once as not.
+ Here you are my man, and I'll tell you why! Months ago you put your
+ property out of your hands, boasting that you did so to escape losing it
+ on prosecution for libel."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "It is true that I did convert all my immovable property into personal
+ property, such as I could trust safely to others, and chiefly to escape
+ ruin through possible libel suits."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Very good, sir. Having placed yourself beyond the pale of the law, may
+ God help your soul if you DON'T make precisely such a retraction as I
+ have demanded. I've got you now, and by&mdash;before you can get out of
+ this room you've got to both write and sign precisely the retraction I
+ have demanded, and before you go, anyhow&mdash;you&mdash;-low-lived&mdash;lying&mdash;-,
+ I'll teach you what personal responsibility is outside of the law; and,
+ by&mdash;, Sheriff Cummings and all the friends you've got in the world
+ besides, can't save you, you&mdash;-, etc.! No, sir. I'm alone now, and
+ I'm prepared to be shot down just here and now rather than be villified
+ by you as I have been, and suffer you to escape me after publishing
+ those charges, not only here where I am known and universally respected,
+ but where I am not personally known and may be injured."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I confess this speech, with its terrible and but too plainly implied
+ threat of killing me if I did not sign the paper he demanded, terrified
+ me, especially as I saw he was working himself up to the highest
+ possible pitch of passion, and instinct told me that any reply other
+ than one of seeming concession to his demands would only be fuel to a
+ raging fire, so I replied:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, if I've got to sign&mdash;," and then I paused some time.
+ Resuming, I said, "But, Mr. Winters, you are greatly excited. Besides, I
+ see you are laboring under a total misapprehension. It is your duty not
+ to inflame but to calm yourself. I am prepared to show you, if you will
+ only point out the article that you allude to, that you regard as
+ 'charges' what no calm and logical mind has any right to regard as such.
+ Show me the charges, and I will try, at all events; and if it becomes
+ plain that no charges have been preferred, then plainly there can be
+ nothing to retract, and no one could rightly urge you to demand a
+ retraction. You should beware of making so serious a mistake, for
+ however honest a man may be, every one is liable to misapprehend.
+ Besides you assume that I am the author of some certain article which
+ you have not pointed out. It is hasty to do so."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He then pointed to some numbered paragraphs in a TRIBUNE article, headed
+ "What's the Matter with Yellow Jacket?" saying "That's what I refer to."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ To gain time for general reflection and resolution, I took up the paper
+ and looked it over for awhile, he remaining silent, and as I hoped,
+ cooling. I then resumed saying, "As I supposed. I do not admit having
+ written that article, nor have you any right to assume so important a
+ point, and then base important action upon your assumption. You might
+ deeply regret it afterwards. In my published Address to the People, I
+ notified the world that no information as to the authorship of any
+ article would be given without the consent of the writer. I therefore
+ cannot honorably tell you who wrote that article, nor can you exact it."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "If you are not the author, then I do demand to know who is?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I must decline to say."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Then, by&mdash;, I brand you as its author, and shall treat you
+ accordingly."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Passing that point, the most important misapprehension which I notice
+ is, that you regard them as 'charges' at all, when their context, both
+ at their beginning and end, show they are not. These words introduce
+ them: 'Such an investigation [just before indicated], we think MIGHT
+ result in showing some of the following points.' Then follow eleven
+ specifications, and the succeeding paragraph shows that the suggested
+ investigation 'might EXONERATE those who are generally believed guilty.'
+ You see, therefore, the context proves they are not preferred as
+ charges, and this you seem to have overlooked."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ While making those comments, Mr. Winters frequently interrupted me in
+ such a way as to convince me that he was resolved not to consider
+ candidly the thoughts contained in my words. He insisted upon it that
+ they were charges, and "By&mdash;," he would make me take them back as
+ charges, and he referred the question to Philip Lynch, to whom I then
+ appealed as a literary man, as a logician, and as an editor, calling his
+ attention especially to the introductory paragraph just before quoted.
+ He replied, "if they are not charges, they certainly are insinuations,"
+ whereupon Mr. Winters renewed his demands for retraction precisely such
+ as he had before named, except that he would allow me to state who did
+ write the article if I did not myself, and this time shaking his fist in
+ my face with more cursings and epithets.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When he threatened me with his clenched fist, instinctively I tried to
+ rise from my chair, but Winters then forcibly thrust me down, as he did
+ every other time (at least seven or eight), when under similar imminent
+ danger of bruising by his fist (or for aught I could know worse than
+ that after the first stunning blow), which he could easily and safely to
+ himself have dealt me so long as he kept me down and stood over me.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ This fact it was, which more than anything else, convinced me that by
+ plan and plot I was purposely made powerless in Mr. Winters' hands, and
+ that he did not mean to allow me that advantage of being afoot, which he
+ possessed. Moreover, I then became convinced, that Philip Lynch (and for
+ what reason I wondered) would do absolutely nothing to protect me in his
+ own house. I realized then the situation thoroughly. I had found it
+ equally vain to protest or argue, and I would make no unmanly appeal for
+ pity, still less apologize. Yet my life had been by the plainest
+ possible implication threatened. I was a weak man. I was unarmed. I was
+ helplessly down, and Winters was afoot and probably armed. Lynch was the
+ only "witness." The statements demanded, if given and not explained,
+ would utterly sink me in my own self-respect, in my family's eyes, and
+ in the eyes of the community. On the other hand, should I give the
+ author's name how could I ever expect that confidence of the People
+ which I should no longer deserve, and how much dearer to me and to my
+ family was my life than the life of the real author to his friends. Yet
+ life seemed dear and each minute that remained seemed precious if not
+ solemn. I sincerely trust that neither you nor any of your readers, and
+ especially none with families, may ever be placed in such seeming direct
+ proximity to death while obliged to decide the one question I was
+ compelled to, viz.: What should I do&mdash;I, a man of family, and not
+ as Mr. Winters is, "alone." [The reader is requested not to skip the
+ following.&mdash;M. T.:]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ STRATEGY AND MESMERISM. To gain time for further reflection, and hoping
+ that by a seeming acquiescence I might regain my personal liberty, at
+ least till I could give an alarm, or take advantage of some momentary
+ inadvertence of Winters, and then without a cowardly flight escape, I
+ resolved to write a certain kind of retraction, but previously had
+ inwardly decided:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ First.&mdash;That I would studiously avoid every action which might be
+ construed into the drawing of a weapon, even by a self-infuriated man,
+ no matter what amount of insult might be heaped upon me, for it seemed
+ to me that this great excess of compound profanity, foulness and epithet
+ must be more than a mere indulgence, and therefore must have some
+ object. "Surely in vain the net is spread in the sight of any bird."
+ Therefore, as before without thought, I thereafter by intent kept my
+ hands away from my pockets, and generally in sight and spread upon my
+ knees.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Second.&mdash;I resolved to make no motion with my arms or hands which
+ could possibly be construed into aggression.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Third.&mdash;I resolved completely to govern my outward manner and
+ suppress indignation. To do this, I must govern my spirit. To do that,
+ by force of imagination I was obliged like actors on the boards to
+ resolve myself into an unnatural mental state and see all things through
+ the eyes of an assumed character.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Fourth.&mdash;I resolved to try on Winters, silently, and unconsciously
+ to himself a mesmeric power which I possess over certain kinds of
+ people, and which at times I have found to work even in the dark over
+ the lower animals.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Does any one smile at these last counts? God save you from ever being
+ obliged to beat in a game of chess, whose stake is your life, you having
+ but four poor pawns and pieces and your adversary with his full force
+ unshorn. But if you are, provided you have any strength with breadth of
+ will, do not despair. Though mesmeric power may not save you, it may
+ help you; try it at all events. In this instance I was conscious of
+ power coming into me, and by a law of nature, I know Winters was
+ correspondingly weakened. If I could have gained more time I am sure he
+ would not even have struck me.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ It takes time both to form such resolutions and to recite them. That
+ time, however, I gained while thinking of my retraction, which I first
+ wrote in pencil, altering it from time to time till I got it to suit me,
+ my aim being to make it look like a concession to demands, while in fact
+ it should tersely speak the truth into Mr. Winters' mind. When it was
+ finished, I copied it in ink, and if correctly copied from my first
+ draft it should read as follows. In copying I do not think I made any
+ material change.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ COPY. To Philip Lynch, Editor of the Gold Hill News: I learn that Gen.
+ John B. Winters believes the following (pasted on) clipping from the
+ PEOPLE'S TRIBUNE of January to contain distinct charges of mine against
+ him personally, and that as such he desires me to retract them
+ unqualifiedly.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ In compliance with his request, permit me to say that, although Mr.
+ Winters and I see this matter differently, in view of his strong
+ feelings in the premises, I hereby declare that I do not know those
+ "charges" (if such they are) to be true, and I hope that a critical
+ examination would altogether disprove them. CONRAD WIEGAND. Gold Hill,
+ January 15, 1870.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I then read what I had written and handed it to Mr. Lynch, whereupon Mr.
+ Winters said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "That's not satisfactory, and it won't do;" and then addressing himself
+ to Mr. Lynch, he further said: "How does it strike you?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, I confess I don't see that it retracts anything."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Nor do I," said Winters; "in fact, I regard it as adding insult to
+ injury. Mr. Wiegand you've got to do better than that. You are not the
+ man who can pull wool over my eyes."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "That, sir, is the only retraction I can write."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "No it isn't, sir, and if you so much as say so again you do it at your
+ peril, for I'll thrash you to within an inch of your life, and, by&mdash;,
+ sir, I don't pledge myself to spare you even that inch either. I want
+ you to understand I have asked you for a very different paper, and that
+ paper you've got to sign."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Mr. Winters, I assure you that I do not wish to irritate you, but, at
+ the same time, it is utterly impossible for me to write any other paper
+ than that which I have written. If you are resolved to compel me to sign
+ something, Philip Lynch's hand must write at your dictation, and if,
+ when written, I can sign it I will do so, but such a document as you say
+ you must have from me, I never can sign. I mean what I say."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Well, sir, what's to be done must be done quickly, for I've been here
+ long enough already. I'll put the thing in another shape (and then
+ pointing to the paper); don't you know those charges to be false?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I do not."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Do you know them to be true?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Of my own personal knowledge I do not."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Why then did you print them?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Because rightly considered in their connection they are not charges,
+ but pertinent and useful suggestions in answer to the queries of a
+ correspondent who stated facts which are inexplicable."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Don't you know that I know they are false?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "If you do, the proper course is simply to deny them and court an
+ investigation."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "And do YOU claim the right to make ME come out and deny anything you
+ may choose to write and print?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ To that question I think I made no reply, and he then further said:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Come, now, we've talked about the matter long enough. I want your final
+ answer&mdash;did you write that article or not?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I cannot in honor tell you who wrote it."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Did you not see it before it was printed?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Most certainly, sir."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "And did you deem it a fit thing to publish?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Most assuredly, sir, or I would never have consented to its appearance.
+ Of its authorship I can say nothing whatever, but for its publication I
+ assume full, sole and personal responsibility."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "And do you then retract it or not?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Mr. Winters, if my refusal to sign such a paper as you have demanded
+ must entail upon me all that your language in this room fairly implies,
+ then I ask a few minutes for prayer."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Prayer!&mdash;-you, this is not your hour for prayer&mdash;your time to
+ pray was when you were writing those&mdash;lying charges. Will you sign
+ or not?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "You already have my answer."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "What! do you still refuse?"
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "I do, sir."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Take that, then," and to my amazement and inexpressible relief he drew
+ only a rawhide instead of what I expected&mdash;a bludgeon or pistol.
+ With it, as he spoke, he struck at my left ear downwards, as if to tear
+ it off, and afterwards on the side of the head. As he moved away to get
+ a better chance for a more effective shot, for the first time I gained a
+ chance under peril to rise, and I did so pitying him from the very
+ bottom of my soul, to think that one so naturally capable of true
+ dignity, power and nobility could, by the temptations of this State, and
+ by unfortunate associations and aspirations, be so deeply debased as to
+ find in such brutality anything which he could call satisfaction&mdash;but
+ the great hope for us all is in progress and growth, and John B.
+ Winters, I trust, will yet be able to comprehend my feelings.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ He continued to beat me with all his great force, until absolutely
+ weary, exhausted and panting for breath. I still adhered to my purpose
+ of non- aggressive defence, and made no other use of my arms than to
+ defend my head and face from further disfigurement. The mere pain
+ arising from the blows he inflicted upon my person was of course
+ transient, and my clothing to some extent deadened its severity, as it
+ now hides all remaining traces.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When I supposed he was through, taking the butt end of his weapon and
+ shaking it in my face, he warned me, if I correctly understood him, of
+ more yet to come, and furthermore said, if ever I again dared introduce
+ his name to print, in either my own or any other public journal, he
+ would cut off my left ear (and I do not think he was jesting) and send
+ me home to my family a visibly mutilated man, to be a standing warning
+ to all low-lived puppies who seek to blackmail gentlemen and to injure
+ their good names. And when he did so operate, he informed me that his
+ implement would not be a whip but a knife.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ When he had said this, unaccompanied by Mr. Lynch, as I remember it, he
+ left the room, for I sat down by Mr. Lynch, exclaiming: "The man is mad&mdash;he
+ is utterly mad&mdash;this step is his ruin&mdash;it is a mistake&mdash;it
+ would be ungenerous in me, despite of all the ill usage I have here
+ received, to expose him, at least until he has had an opportunity to
+ reflect upon the matter. I shall be in no haste."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ "Winters is very mad just now," replied Mr. Lynch, "but when he is
+ himself he is one of the finest men I ever met. In fact, he told me the
+ reason he did not meet you upstairs was to spare you the humiliation of
+ a beating in the sight of others."
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ I submit that that unguarded remark of Philip Lynch convicts him of
+ having been privy in advance to Mr. Winters' intentions whatever they
+ may have been, or at least to his meaning to make an assault upon me,
+ but I leave to others to determine how much censure an editor deserves
+ for inveigling a weak, non-combatant man, also a publisher, to a pen of
+ his own to be horsewhipped, if no worse, for the simple printing of what
+ is verbally in the mouth of nine out of ten men, and women too, upon the
+ street.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ While writing this account two theories have occurred to me as possibly
+ true respecting this most remarkable assault: First&mdash;The aim may
+ have been simply to extort from me such admissions as in the hands of
+ money and influence would have sent me to the Penitentiary for libel.
+ This, however, seems unlikely, because any statements elicited by fear
+ or force could not be evidence in law or could be so explained as to
+ have no force. The statements wanted so badly must have been desired for
+ some other purpose. Second&mdash;The other theory has so dark and
+ wilfully murderous a look that I shrink from writing it, yet as in all
+ probability my death at the earliest practicable moment has already been
+ decreed, I feel I should do all I can before my hour arrives, at least
+ to show others how to break up that aristocratic rule and combination
+ which has robbed all Nevada of true freedom, if not of manhood itself.
+ Although I do not prefer this hypothesis as a "charge," I feel that as
+ an American citizen I still have a right both to think and to speak my
+ thoughts even in the land of Sharon and Winters, and as much so
+ respecting the theory of a brutal assault (especially when I have been
+ its subject) as respecting any other apparent enormity. I give the
+ matter simply as a suggestion which may explain to the proper
+ authorities and to the people whom they should represent, a well
+ ascertained but notwithstanding a darkly mysterious fact. The scheme of
+ the assault may have been:
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ First&mdash;To terrify me by making me conscious of my own helplessness
+ after making actual though not legal threats against my life.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Second&mdash;To imply that I could save my life only by writing or
+ signing certain specific statements which if not subsequently explained
+ would eternally have branded me as infamous and would have consigned my
+ family to shame and want, and to the dreadful compassion and patronage
+ of the rich.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Third&mdash;To blow my brains out the moment I had signed, thereby
+ preventing me from making any subsequent explanation such as could
+ remove the infamy.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Fourth&mdash;Philip Lynch to be compelled to testify that I was killed
+ by John B. Winters in self-defence, for the conviction of Winters would
+ bring him in as an accomplice. If that was the programme in John B.
+ Winters' mind nothing saved my life but my persistent refusal to sign,
+ when that refusal seemed clearly to me to be the choice of death.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The remarkable assertion made to me by Mr. Winters, that pity only
+ spared my life on Wednesday evening last, almost compels me to believe
+ that at first he could not have intended me to leave that room alive;
+ and why I was allowed to, unless through mesmeric or some other
+ invisible influence, I cannot divine. The more I reflect upon this
+ matter, the more probable as true does this horrible interpretation
+ become.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ The narration of these things I might have spared both to Mr. Winters
+ and to the public had he himself observed silence, but as he has both
+ verbally spoken and suffered a thoroughly garbled statement of facts to
+ appear in the Gold Hill News I feel it due to myself no less than to
+ this community, and to the entire independent press of America and Great
+ Britain, to give a true account of what even the Gold Hill News has
+ pronounced a disgraceful affair, and which it deeply regrets because of
+ some alleged telegraphic mistake in the account of it. [Who received the
+ erroneous telegrams?]
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Though he may not deem it prudent to take my life just now, the
+ publication of this article I feel sure must compel Gen. Winters (with
+ his peculiar views about his right to exemption from criticism by me) to
+ resolve on my violent death, though it may take years to compass it.
+ Notwithstanding I bear him no ill will; and if W. C. Ralston and William
+ Sharon, and other members of the San Francisco mining and milling Ring
+ feel that he above all other men in this State and California is the
+ most fitting man to supervise and control Yellow Jacket matters, until I
+ am able to vote more than half their stock I presume he will be retained
+ to grace his present post.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ Meantime, I cordially invite all who know of any sort of important
+ villainy which only can be cured by exposure (and who would expose it if
+ they felt sure they would not be betrayed under bullying threats), to
+ communicate with the PEOPLE'S TRIBUNE; for until I am murdered, so long
+ as I can raise the means to publish, I propose to continue my efforts at
+ least to revive the liberties of the State, to curb oppression, and to
+ benefit man's world and God's earth. <br /><br />CONRAD WIEGAND.
+ </p>
+ <p>
+ <br /><br />
+ </p>
+ <blockquote>
+ <p>
+ [It does seem a pity that the Sheriff was shut out, since the good
+ sense of a general of militia and of a prominent editor failed to
+ teach them that the merited castigation of this weak, half-witted
+ child was a thing that ought to have been done in the street, where
+ the poor thing could have a chance to run. When a journalist maligns a
+ citizen, or attacks his good name on hearsay evidence, he deserves to
+ be thrashed for it, even if he is a "non-combatant" weakling; but a
+ generous adversary would at least allow such a lamb the use of his
+ legs at such a time.&mdash;M. T.]
+ </p>
+ </blockquote>
+ </blockquote>
+ <p>
+ <br /> <br />
+ </p>
+<pre xml:space="preserve">
+
+
+
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+</pre>
+ </body>
+</html>