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diff --git a/32841.txt b/32841.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..4583013 --- /dev/null +++ b/32841.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1060 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Laird o' Coul's Ghost, by Anonymous + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Laird o' Coul's Ghost + +Author: Anonymous + +Other: Rev. Dr. Gordon + +Release Date: June 16, 2010 [EBook #32841] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LAIRD O' COUL'S GHOST *** + + + + +Produced by Chris Curnow, Lindy Walsh and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net. + + + + + + + + + +The Laird o' Coul's Ghost. + + + + + _AN EIGHTEENTH-CENTURY CHAP-BOOK._ + + The Laird o' Coul's Ghost. + + + FROM THE ORIGINAL MS. IN THE POSSESSION OF + THE REV. DR. GORDON, ST. ANDREW'S, GLASGOW. + + + LONDON: + ELLIOT STOCK, 62, PATERNOSTER ROW. + 1892. + + + + +INTROIT. + + +The MS. of _Coul's Ghost_ was found among the Papers of Collector +Hamilton, of Dalzell (pronounced _Deell_), who died in the summer of 1788, +aged 91 years. This incident made him 25 years old when this Story was +fledged, which was in 1722. In 1733 Lady Anne Spencer, Duchess of +Hamilton, came to Hamilton Palace, and the Collector gave to Her Grace +this Story to read. The Duke, to play a practical joke on the Collector, +caused one of his servants to whisper to him while at supper, that there +was a Gentleman calling, who desired to see him immediately. Being asked +Who he was, the valet answered, "_The Laird o' Coul_." The Guests were all +amused at the Collector's embarrassment, who sat still and allowed the +"Gentleman" to await in the Hall! + +_The Laird o' Coul's Ghost_ first appeared in type in 1750, and was +eagerly bought by all and sundry from the _Flying Stationers_ who hawked +it about the country. Mrs. Ogilvie delivered it to Watkins, the King's +Printer, which was Published from Newcastle. In 1788 a fanatical +character, Mrs. Elizabeth Steuart, of Coltness, termed "Aunt Betty," +became a convert to the Halcyon notions of Emmanuel Swedenborg, founder of +"the New Jerusalem Sect." This personage was related to Henry Erskine, +Lord Advocate for Scotland, and was enraptured with the Penny Chap-Book: +so much so that she embodied it in her "Remarks and Illustrations of the +World of Spirits," which she strictly enjoined her Nephew to print after +her decease. Not a Copy of this Brochure of 206 pages is in any of our +University Libraries; and a few weeks ago L3 3s. were paid for a soiled +copy. "Aunt Betty" does not miss to note one point in _The Laird o' Coul's +Ghost_ that may insinuate her imaginations about Angels and the Unseen; +while she adverts to the Ghosts of Lord Clarendon, Sir George Villiars, +the father of the Duke of Buckingham, and to the Dialogue of Dives and +Lazarus, in that remarkable Parable. She ferreted out from Mrs. Henrietta +Hog, Edinburgh, daughter of the Rev. Mr. Ogilvie, Innerwick, that the +Sequel was undoubtedly the genuine Copy in her father's handwriting. No +declaration has been given how the MS. came into Collector Hamilton's +possession. Mr. Ogilvie died soon after the Conference. + +J. F. S. G. + + ABBACY OF SUSANNA RIG, + GLASGOW, + _Xtmas, 1891_. + + + + +The First Conference + + _An Account of Mr. Maxwell Laird of Coul his Appearance after Death + to Mr. Ogilvie a Minister of the present Establishment at Innerwick, + 3 Miles East from Dunbar._ + + +Upon the 3d Day of February, 1722, at seven a clock at Night after I had +parted with Thurston [his Name Cant], and was coming up the Burial Road, +one came riding up after me: upon hearing the Noise of his Horse's feet, I +took it to be Thurston, but upon looking back, and seeing the Horse of a +greyish Colour, I called "Who is there?" The Answer was, "The Laird of +Coul [his Name Maxwell], be not afraid." Then looking to him by the Help +of the dark Light which the Moon afforded, I took him to be Collector +Castellow designing to put a Trick upon me, and immediately I struck at +him with all my Force, with my Cane, thinking I mould leave upon him a +Mark, to make him remember his Presumption; but being sensible I aimed as +well as ever I did in my Life, yet my Cane finding no Resistance, but +flying out of my Hand the Distance of about 60 Feet, and observing it by +its white Head, I dismounted and took it up, and had some Difficulty in +mounting again, what by the ramping of my Horse, and what by Reason of a +certain Kind of Trembling throughout my whole Joints; Something likewise +of Anger had its share in the Confusion; for, as I thought, he laughed +when my Staff flew away; Coming up with him again, who halted all the Time +I sought my Staff, I asked once more, "Who he was?" He answered, "The +Laird of Coul." I enquired--j{st}, "If he was the Laird of Coul, what +brought him hither?" and "What was his Business with me?" + +C. The reason of my waiting on you is, that I know you are disposed to do +for me a Thing which none of your Brethren in Nithsdale will so much as +attempt, tho' it serve to ever so good Purposes. I told him I would never +refuse to do a Thing to serve a good Purpose, If I thought I was obliged +to do it as my Duty. He answered, since I had undertaken what he found few +in Nithsdale would, for he had tryed some upon that Subject, who were more +obliged to him than ever I was, or to any Person living: I drew my Horse, +and halted in Surprize, asking What I had undertaken? He answered, that on +the Sabbath last, I had heartily condemned M{r}. Paton, and the Rest of +the Ministers in Dumfries Presbytery for dissuading Dr. Menzies's Man, +from keeping his Appointment with me, and that if you had been in their +Place, you would have persuaded the Lad to do as I desired him; and that +you would have gone with him, lest he had been feared; and that if you had +been in Mr. Paton's Place, you would have delivered my Commissions your +self, since it tended to do some People Justice. + +O. Pray, Coul, who informed you that I talked at that Rate? + +C. You must know, that we are acquainted with many Things, that the Living +know nothing about. These Things you did say, and much more to that +Purpose, and all that I want is, that you fulfill your Promise, and +deliver my Commissions to my loving Wife. + +O. 'Tis a Pity, Coul, that you who know so many Things, should not know +the Difference between an absolute, and a conditional Promise. I did +indeed at the Time you mention, blame Mr. Paton, for I think him justly +blameable, for hindering the Lad to meet with you, and if I had been in +his Place, I would have acted quite the Reverse: but did I ever say, that +if you would come to Innerwick, and employ me, that I would go all the way +to Dumfries upon that Errand? That is what never so much as once entered +into my Thought. + +C. What was in your Thought I do not pretend to know; but I can depend +upon my Information, that these were your _Words_: but I see you are in +some Disorder, I will wait on you again, when you have more presence of +mind. + +By the Time we were got to James Dickson's Inclosure below the Churchyard, +and while I was recollecting in my mind, whether ever I had spoken these +Words he alledged, he broke from me thro' the Churchyard with greater +violence, than ever any man on horseback is capable of, and with such a +singing and buzzing noise, as put me in greater Disorder, than I was all +the Time I was with him. I came to my House, and my Wife observed +something more than ordinary Paleness in my Countenance, and would alledge +that something ailed me. I called for a Dram & told her I was a little +uneasie; after I found myself a little eased and refreshed, I retired to +my Closet, to meditate on this the most astonishing Adventure of my whole +Life. + + + + +The 2d Conference. + + +Upon the 5th of March 1722. Being at Blarehead baptizing the Shepherd's +Child, I came off at Sunsetting, or, a very little after. Near Will. +White's March the Laird of Coul came up with me on Horseback as formerly, +and, after his first Salutation bid me not be afraid, for he would do me +no Harm. I told him I was not in the least afraid, in the Name of God, and +of Christ my Saviour, that he would do the least Harm to me: for, I knew +that He in whom I trusted was stronger than all them put together, and if +any of them should attempt even to do the Horse I rode upon, Harm, as you +have done to Dr. Menzies' man,[1] if it be true that is said, and +generally believed about Dumfries, I have free access to complain to my +Lord and Master, to the Lash of whose Resentment you are as much liable +now as before. + +C. You need not multiply Words upon that Head, for you are as safe with +me, and safer, if safer can be, than when I was alive. + +I said, Well then, Coul, Let me have a peaceable and easy Conversation +with you for the Time we ride together, and give me some Information about +the Affairs of the other World, for no man inclines to lose his Time, in +conversing with the Dead, without having a Prospect of hearing and +learning something that may be usefull. + +C. Well, Sir, I will satisfy you, as far as I think it proper and +convenient. Let me know what Information you want from me. + +O. May I then ask you, if you be in a State of Happiness or not? + +C. There are a great many Things that I _can_ answer, which the Living are +entirely ignorant of: there are many more Things, that notwithstanding the +additional Knowledge I have acquired, since my Death, that I _cannot_ +answer, and there are several Things and Questions that you may start, of +which the last is one, that I _will_ not answer. + +O. Then I know not how to manage our Conversation, for whatever I shall +enquire of you, I see you can easily shift me, so that I might profit more +by conversing with myself. + +C. You may try. + +O. Well then, what sort of a Body is it that you appear in, and what sort +of a Horse is it that you ride on, that appears so full of mettle? + +C. You may depend upon it, 'tis not the same Body that I was witness to +your Marriage in, nor in which I died, for that is in the Grave rotting; +but it is such a Body as answers me in a Moment, for I can fly as fast as +my Soul can do without it, so that I can go to Dumfries and return again, +before you ride twice the Length of your Horse; nay if I incline to go to +London, or to Jerusalem, or to the Moon, if you please, I can perform all +these Journeys equally soon, for it costs me nothing but a Thought or +Wish; for this Body you see, is as fleet as your Thought, for in the same +Moment of Time that you can carry your Thoughts to Rome, I can go there in +Person. And for my Horse, he is, much like myself, for 'tis Andrew +Johnstoun who was seven years my Tennant, and he died about 48 Hours +before me. + +O. So it seems when Andrew Johnstoun inclines to ride, you must serve him +for an Horse, as he now does you. + +C. You are mistaken. + +O. I thought all Distinction between Mistresses and Maids, Lairds & +Tennants had been done away at Death. + +C. True 'tis so, yet still you don't take up the matter. + +O. Is then, Sir, this one of the Questions you _will not_ answer? + +C. You are still mistaken; for that Question I _can_ answer, and after +this you may readily understand. + +O. Tell me then, Coul, have you never yet appeared before God, nor +received any Sentence from him as a Judge. + +C. Never yet. + +O. I know you was a Scholar, Coul; and 'tis generally believed there is a +private Judgment, besides the general at the great Day. The former is +immediately after Death. Upon this he interrupted me, crying, No such +Thing, no such Thing, no Tryal till the last Day: The Heaven which good +Men enjoy immediately after Death, consists only in the Serenity of their +Thoughts, the Satisfaction of a good Conscience, and the certain Hope they +have of an Eternity of Joy when that Day shall come. The Punishment or +Hell of the wicked immediately after Death, consists in the dreadful +Things of their awakened Conscience, and the Terror of facing the great +Judge, and the sensible Apprehensions of eternal Torments ensuing; and +this bears still a due Proportion to the Evils they have done, when they +were living. So indeed the State of some good Folks differs but little in +Happiness from what they enjoyed upon Earth, save only they are freed from +the Body and the Sins and Sorrows that attend it. And, on the other Hand, +there are some, who may be said rather not to have been _good_ than that +they have been _wicked_ while living: their Condition is not easily +distinguished from that of the _former_, and under that Class comes a +great Herd of Souls, a vast Number of your ignorant People, who have not +much minded the Concerns of Eternity, but, at the same Time, have lived in +much Indolence, Ignorance, and Innocence. + +O. I always thought that their rejecting the Terms of Salvation offered, +was sufficient Ground for God to punish them with his eternal Displeasure. +And as to their Ignorance, that could never excuse them, since they lived +in a Place of the World, where the Knowledge of these Things might easily +have been attained. + +C. They never properly rejected the Terms of Salvation, they never, +strictly speaking, rejected Christ, poor Souls! they had as great Liking +both to Him, and to Heaven, as their gross understandings were capable of; +and as to their Ignorance, impartial Reason must make many allowances, +such as, the Stupidity of their Parents, their want of Education, their +Distance from People of good Sense and Knowledge, the uninterrupted +Application they were obliged to give to their secular affairs, for their +daily Bread, the impious Treachery of their Pastor, whom they heard +perhaps but once a month, or so, and thro' his unfaithfulness are +perswaded, that if they be of such or such a Party all is well; and many +other Considerations of the like Nature, which God who is pure and perfect +Reason itself will not overlook. These are not so much under the Load of +the Divine Displeasure, as they are _out of His Graces and Favours_, for +you know it is one Thing to be discourted, and quite anoyr Thing to be +persecuted with all the Power and Rage of an incensed earthly King. So I +assure you, men's Faces in this World are not more various and different, +than their Conditions are after Death. + +O. I am loath to believe all that you have said at this Time, Coul; but I +will not dispute these matters with you, besides, some Things you have +advanced, seem to contradict the Scriptures, which I shall ever look upon +as the infallible Truths of God; for I find by the Parable of Dives and +Lazarus, that one was immediately carried up by the Angels to Abraham's +Bosom, and the other thrust down to a Place of Torment. + +C. Excuse me, Sir, that does not contradict one word that I have said; but +you seem not to understand the Parable, whose only End is to illustrate +the Truth, that a Man may be very happy and flourishing in this World, and +most wretched in the next; and that a man may be most miserable and +wretched in this World, and most glorious and happy in the next. + +O. Be it so, Coul, I yield that Point, and shall pass to another, which +has afforded me much Speculation since our last encounter, and that is, +how you came to know that I talked after the manner I did concerning Mr. +Paton and you on the j{st} Sabbath of February. Was you present with us +but invisible. + +He answered somewhat haughtily, No, Sir, I was not present myself. + +O. I would not have you to be angry, Coul; I proposed this Question for my +own satisfaction, but, if you judge it improper to answer it, Let it pass. + +After he had paused, with his Eyes fixed, as I thought, on the Ground for +about 3 or 4 Seconds at most; with some Haste and seeming Cheerfulness, he +says: Well, Sir, I will satisfy you in that Point. You must know, that +from Time to Time, there are sent from Heaven Angels to guard and +Comfort, and to do oyr special Services to good People, and even the +Spirits of good men departed are employed on that very Errand. + +O. And do you think every Man has a Guardian Angel? + +C. No, but a great many particular Men have, and there are but few Houses, +of Distinction especially, but what have one attending them. And from what +you have already heard of these Spirits, 'tis no difficult Matter to +understand, how he may be serviceable to each particular Member of it, +tho' in different Places, at a great Distance. Many are the good offices +that the Angels do to Men that fear God, tho' many Times they are not +sensible of it, and I know assuredly, that one powerful Angel, or even an +active clever Spirit departed, may be sufficient for some villages: But +for your great Cities, such as London, Edinburgh, or the like, there is +one great Angel that has the Superintendency of the whole; and there are +inferior ones, or Spirits departed, to whose particular Charge, such a +particular man of Weight and Bussiness is committed. Now, Sir, the Kingdom +of Sathan does ape the Kingdom of Christ as much in matters of Politicks +as can be: well knowing that the Court of Wisdom is above; so that, hence +are sent out Missionaries too in the same order. But because, the Kingdom +of Sathan is much better replenished than the other, instead of one Devil, +in many Instances, there are 2 or 3 commissioned to attend a particular +Family, if it be a Family of great Influence, Power, or Distinction. + +O. I read that there are 10-000d Times 10-000d Angels that wait on God, +and sing his Praise, and do his Will; and I cannot understand how the good +Angels should be inferior in Number to the Evil. + +C. Did I not say that whatever the Number be, yet the Spirits departed +were employed in the same Bussiness? So, as to the Number of original +Devils, whereof Sathan is the chief, I cannot determine. But you need not +doubt that there are more Spirits departed in that Place you in a loose +general Sense call _Hell_, by almost an Infinity, by what are gone to that +Place, which in the like Sense, you call _Heaven_, which likewise are +employed to the same Purpose. And I can assure you, by the Bye, that there +are as great Differences between Angels, both good and bad, as there are +amongst Men, with Respect to their Sense, Knowledge, Cleverness, and +Cunning or Action. Nay, which is more, the departed Spirits on both +Sides, out doe Severals, from their j{st} Departure, of the Original +Angels; This you'l think a Paradox, yet 'tis true. + +O. I don't doubt of it, but what is that to my Question, concerning which +I am sollicitous? + +C. Take a little Patience, Sir; from what I have said, you might have +understood me, if you had your Thoughts about you, but, I shall explain my +self to you. Both the good and bad Angels have their stated Times of +Rendezvous, and the particular Angel that has the charge either of Towns, +Cities or Kingdoms, not to mention inferiour Villages and Families, and +Persons; all that are transacted in these several Parts of the Country, +are then made open, and at their Encounters, on each Side, every Thing is +told, as in your Paroch, at Milns, Kilns and Smiddies, only with this +Difference, that many Things false are told at the living Encounters, but +nothing but what is exact Truth is told amongst the Dead. Only, I must +observe to you, that as I am credibly informed, several of the inferiour +bad Angels, or Spirits of wicked departed, have told mighty Things which +they have done; and when a more intelligent Spirit has been sent out upon +Enquiry, and, the Report of the former, seeming doubtful, he brings in a +contrary Report, and making it appear Truth, the former fares very ill. + +O. Does ever the like happen among good Angels? + +C. I believe never, for their Regard to Truth prevents it; for while they +observe Truth, they do their Bussiness, and keep their Station, and God is +Truth. + +O. So much Truth being among the good Angels, I shall be apt to think, +that Lyes and Falshood will be as much in Vogue amongst the bad. + +C. A gross mistake, and 'tis not the alone mistake, that the living Folks +labour under anent another World: for the Case is plainly this; as an ill +man will not stick at any Falshood, that may promote his Design, so as +little will an evil Spirit departed stand at any Thing which may make him +successfull; but in making Reports, he must tell the Truth, and nothing +but the Truth, or, Wo be to him; But besides their stated monthly, +Quarterly, and yearly meetings, or whatever they happen to be, the +departed Spirits acquainted can make a Trip to sea, and converse with one +another, yearly, daily and weekly, or oftener if they please. Thus I +answer the Question you are so much concerned about; for, my Information +was from no less than three, viz. Andrew Aikman, who attends Thurston's +Family, and James Corbet who waits upon M{r} Paton's for the Time, and was +then looking after M{rs} Sarah Paton, when shee was at your House, and an +original Emissary appointed to wait on your's. + +O. At this I was much surprized, and after a little thinking, I asked him; +and is there really, Coul, an Emissary from Hell, in whatever Sense you +take it, who attends my Family? + +C. Yes, you may depend upon it. + +O. And what do you think is his Bussiness? + +C. To divert you from your Duty, and to cause you under hand do as many +ill Things as he can, for much depends on having the Minister on their +Side. + +O. Upon this I was struck with a Sort of Terrour, that I cannot account +for, nor express. In the mean Time, he said several Things that I did not +notice, but after a little, I coming to my former Presence of mind, said. +But Coul, tell me in earnest, if there be a Devil that attends my Family, +tho' invisible to us all? + +C. Just as sure as you are breathing; but be not too much dejected upon +this Information; for, I tell you likewise, there is a good Angel that +attends you, who is stronger than the other. + +O. Are you sure of that, Coul? + +C. Yes, there is one just now riding at your Right-hand, who might as well +have been else where, for I meant you no Harm. + +O. And how long has he been with me? + +C. Only since we past Brunsley, but now he is gone. + +O. Coul, we are just now upon Elmscleugh, and I desire to part with you, +tho' I have gained more from our Conversation together, than what perhaps +I would have done otherwise in a twelve month, I chuse rather to see you +at another Time, when you are at Leisure, and I wish it may be at as great +a Distance from Innerwick as you can. + +C. Be it so, but I hope you will be as obliging to me, next Encounter, as +I have been to you this. + +O. I promise you, I will, as far as it consists with my Duty to my Lord +and Master Christ Jesus; and since you oblige me so much by Information, +you may depend upon it, I will answer all the Questions you can propose, +so far as it consists with my Knowledge; but I believe you want no +Information from me. + +C. I came not to be instructed by you, but I want your Help of anoyr Kind. +but more of this at next meeting, so, says he, I bid you Farewell and went +off peaceably at the Head of the Paith[2] opposite to Elmscleugh. + + + + +The Third Conference. + + +Upon the 9{th} of April 1722. as I was returning from Old Hamstocks, Coul +struck up with me upon the Back, at the Foot of the ruinous Inclosure +before we come to Dodds. I told him his last Conversation had proven so +acceptable to me, that I was well pleased to see him again, and that there +was a vast number of Things, which I wanted to inform my Self further of, +if he would be so good as to satisfy me. + +C. Last Time we met, I refused you nothing that you asked, and now I +expect, you will refuse me nothing that I ask. + +O. Nothing, Sir, that is in my Power, or, that I can with safety to my +Reputation and Character. What then are your Demands upon me? + +C. All I desire is, that as you proposed that Sabbath Day, you will go to +my wife, who now possesses all my Effects, and tell her the following +Particulars, and desire her, in my Name, to rectify these Matters. 1{st} +That I was justly owing to Provost Crosby L500 Scots, and three years +Interest, but upon hearing of his Death, my good Brother, the Laird of +Chapel and I, did forge a Discharge narrating the Date of the Bond, the +Sum, and oyr Particulars, with this onerous Clause, that at that Time it +was fallen by, and could not be found, with an Obligation on the Provost's +Part, to deliver up the Bond assoon as he could hit upon it, and this +Discharge was dated three Months before the Provost's Death: and when his +only Son and Successor Andrew Crosby wrote to me concerning this Bond, I +came to him, and shewed him that Discharge, which silenced him, so that I +got my Bond without more adoe. And when I heard of Robert Kennedy's Death, +with the same Help of Chapel, I got a Bill upon him, for L190 sterline, +which I got full and compleat Payment of, and Chapel got the half. When I +was in Dumfries the Day Thomas Greer died, to whom I was owing an account +of L36 sterline, Chapel my good Brother at that Time was at London, and +not being able of my Self, being but a bad writer to get a Discharge of +the account, which I wanted exceedingly, I met accidentally with Robert +Boyd a poor Writer Lad in Dumfries. I took him to Mrs Carricks, gave him a +Bottle of wine, and told him, that I had payed Thomas Greer's Account, but +wanted a Discharge, and if he would help me to it, I would reward him. He +flew away from me in great Passion, saying he would rayr be hanged; but, +if I had a mind for these Things, I had best wait till Chapel came home. +This gave me great Trouble, fearing that what he & I had formerly done, +was no Secret. I followed Boyd to the street, made an Apology that I was +jesting, commended him for his Honesty, and took him solemnly engaged that +he should not repeat what had passed. I sent for my Cousin Barn-howrie +your good Brother, who with no Difficulty for one Guinea and an half, +undertook and performed all that I wanted, and for one Guinea more, made +me up a Discharge for L200 Scots, which I was owing to your Fayr in Law +and his friend M{r} Morehead, which Discharge I gave in to John Ewart, +when he required the Money, and he, at my Desire, produced it to you, +which you sustained. A great many of the like Instances were told, which I +cannot remember, the Person's Names, and Sums: But added he, what vexes me +more than all these, is the Injustice I did to Homer Maxwell Tenant to +Lord Nithsdale for whom I was Factor. I had borrowed 2,000{d} merks from +him, 500{d} of which he borrowed from another Hand, and I gave him my +Bond; for Reasons I contrived, I obliged him to Secrecy, he dyed within +the year, he had nine Children, and his wife had dyed a month before +himself. I came to seal up his Papers for my Lord's Security. His eldest +Daughter intreated me to look through them all, and to give her an account +what was their Stock, and what was their Debt. I very willingly undertook +it, and in going through his Papers, I put my own Bond in my Pocket. His +circumstances proved bad, and the nine Children are now starving. These +Things I desire you to represent to my Wife; take her Brother with you, +and let them be immediately rectifyed, for shee has sufficient Fund to do +it upon, and, if that were done, I think I would be easie and happy; +therefore I hope you will make no Delay. + +O. After a short Pause I answered; 'tis a good Errand, Coul, that you are +sending me to do Justice to the oppressed and injured; but notwithstanding +that I see my Self among the Rest, that come in for L200{d} Scots, yet I +beg a little Time to consider on the Matter, and since I find you are as +much master of Reason _now_ and more than ever; I'l j{st} reason with you +upon the matter in it's general view; and then, w{t} Respect to the +Expediency of my being the particular messenger; and this I'le do, w{t} +all manner of Frankness. For, from what you have said, I see clearly what +your present state is, so that, I need not ask any more Questions upon +that Head, and you need not bid me take Courage, or not be afraid, for at +this moment, I am no more afraid of you, than of a new born Child. + +C. Well, say on. + +O. Tell me then, since such is your Agility, that in the twinkling of an +Eye, you can fly 1000{d} miles, if your Desire to do Justice to the +oppressed Persons be so great as you pretend; what is the Reason, that +you do not fly to the Coffers of some rich Jew or Banker, where is +thousands of Gold and money, invisibly lift it, and invisibly return it to +the Persons injured. Or, since your wife has sufficient Fund and more, why +can't you empty her Purse in your Hat invisibly to make the People amends? + +C. Because I _cannot_. + +O. If these Things were rectified, _you would be easy and happy_. I do not +at all credit that; for whatever Justice may now be done to these People, +yet the Guilt of the base Action must still belong to you. + +C. Now, you think you have silenced me, and gained a notable victory, +but, I will shew you your Mistake immediately, for I cannot touch any +Man's Gold or Money by Reason of these Spirits, which are the stated +Guardians of Justice and Honesty. + +O. What is that you tell me, Coul; Do not unworthy Fellows break Houses +every Night, and yet you, who can put your Self in 100{d} Shapes in a +Moment, cannot do it; what is that you say Coul? + +C. 'Tis true, Sir, that among the Living, Men may find some probable way +of securing themselves, but, if Spirits departed were allowed, then no Man +would be secure, for, in that Case, every Man they had a Prejudice at, +would soon be beggared. + +O. But might not you go, to the Mines of Mexico, where these little Sums +would never be missed? + +C. No, for the same Reason. + +O. But, Coul there is so much Treasure lost in the Sea, you can easily +dive into the Bottom of it, search that, and refund these People their +Losses, and thereby no Man is injured. + +C. You are a little too forward, and incline much to banter; what I said +might satisfie you; but since it does not, I tell you further, that no +Spirits, good or bad, have any Power to take any Money or Gold: the Good +never do. And the Bad, if once in an Age they do, it is no Small Parcel +[so, in the Copy]; for if it were allowed them, then, they would be very +successful in their Bussiness, for they would never fail to gain their +Point. + +O. What hinders them, said I, Coul? + +C. Superior Power, that guards & governs all. + +O. You have satisfied me entirely upon that Head, said I; but prithee, +Coul, what is the Reason, that you cannot go to your Wife yourself, and +tell her what you have a Mind to; I should think this a sure way to gain +your Point. + +C. The Reason is, _because I cannot_. + +O. That does not satisfy me Coul. + +C. And that is one of the Questions that I told you long ago, I _would +not_ answer. But, if you will go, as I desired, I promise I mail give you +full satisfaction, after you have done your Bussiness. Trust me for once, +and believe me I will not disappoint you. + + + + +The Fourth Conference. + + +Upon the 10{th} of April 1722. coming from old-Camus upon the Post road, I +met with Coul as formerly, upon the Head of the Pathe called the _Pease_. +He asked me, if I had considered the matter he had recommended? I told +him, I had, and was in the same opinion that I was of, when we parted: +that I could not possibly undertake his Commission, unless he would give +it in Writing under his Hand. I wanted nothing but Reason to determine me, +not only in that, but all oyr Affairs of my Life. I added that the List +of his Grievances was so long, that I could not possibly remember them +w{t}out being in Writing. + +I know, said he, that this is a mere Evasion: but tell me, if your +Neighbour, the Laird of Thurston will do it? I would gladly wait upon him. + +O. I am sure, said I, he will not: and, if he inclined so, I would do what +I could to hinder him; for, I think, he has as little Concern in these +matters, as I. But tell me, Coul, is it not as easie for you to write your +story, as to tell it, or to ride on What is it you call him, for I have +forgotten your Horse's Name. + +C. No, Sir, 'tis not, and perhaps I may convince you of it afterwards. + +O. I would be glad to hear a Reason that is solid, for your not speaking +to your Wife your Self. But however, any rational Creature may see, what a +Fool I would make of my self, if I should go to Dumfries and tell your +Wife, that you had appeared to me, and told me of so many Forgeries and +Villanies which you had committed, and that shee behoved to make +Reparation. The Event might, perhaps, be, that shee would scold me: for, +as 'tis very probable, shee will be loth to part with any money shee +possesses, and therefore tell me, I was mad, or possibly might pursue me +for Calumny. How could I vindicate my Self, how should I prove, that ever +you had spoken with me? M{r} Paton, and the Rest of my Broyrn would tell +me, that it was a Devil who had appeared to me, and why should I repeat +these Things as Truth, which he that was a Lyar from the Beginning had +told me? Chapel and Barn-howrie would be upon my Top, and pursue me before +the Commissary, and every Body will look upon me, as brainsick or mad. +Therefore, I entreat you, do not insist upon sending me an April-Errand: +The Reasonableness of my Demand I leave to your Consideration, as you did +your former to mine; for I think what I ask is very just. But dropping +these matters till our next Interview; give me leave to enter upon some +more diverting Subject; and I do not know, Coul, but thro' the Information +given to me, you may do as much Service to Mankind, as the Redress of all +the Wrongs, you have mentioned would amount to, &c. + + +THE END. + + +_Elliot Stock, Paternoster Row, London._ + + + + +Footnotes: + +[1] The first appearance that Coul made was to Dr. Menzies's Servant at a +Time he was watering his Master's Horse. At some subsequent Appearance, +while the Lad was about the same Business, whether Coul had done him any +real Harm, or, that the Lad had fallen from his Horse thro' Fear and +Confusion, is uncertain, but so it was, that the Lad was found Dead on the +Road. + +[2] A Paith in Scottish signifies a steep, and oft times rugged Road. + + + + +Transcriber's Notes: + +Passages in italics are indicated by _italics_. + +Superscripted letters are shown in {superscript}. + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Laird o' Coul's Ghost, by Anonymous + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LAIRD O' COUL'S GHOST *** + +***** This file should be named 32841.txt or 32841.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/3/2/8/4/32841/ + +Produced by Chris Curnow, Lindy Walsh and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net. + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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