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FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.08.01*END** +[Portions of this header are copyright (C) 2001 by Michael S. Hart +and may be reprinted only when these Etexts are free of all fees.] +[Project Gutenberg is a TradeMark and may not be used in any sales +of Project Gutenberg Etexts or other materials be they hardware or +software or any other related product without express permission.] + + + + +This etext was produced by an anonymous volunteer. + + + + + +SAMANTHA AT SARATOGA BY JOSIAH ALLEN'S WIFE + (Marietta Holly) + + + +Dedication: + + TO THE GREAT ARMY OF + SUMMER TRAMPS + THIS BOOK IS DEDICATED + BY THEIR COMRADE AND FELLOW WANDERER + THE AUTHOR + + + + +CONTENTS. + +CHAPTER I. SAMANTHA AT SARATOGA + +CHAPTER II. ARDELIA TUTT AND HER MOTHER + +CHAPTER III. THE CHERITY OF THE JONESVILLIANS + +CHAPTER IV. ARDELIA AND ABRAM GEE + +CHAPTER V. WE ARRIVE AT SARATOGA + +CHAPTER VI. SARATOGA BY DAYLIGHT + +CHAPTER VII. SEEING THE DIFFERENT SPRINGS + +CHAPTER VIII. JOSIAH AND SAMANTHA TAKE A LONG WALK + +CHAPTER IX. JOSIAH'S FLIRTATIONS + +CHAPTER X. MISS G. WASHINGTON FLAMM + +CHAPTER XI. VISIT TO THE INDIAN ENCAMPMENT + +CHAPTER XII. A DRIVE TO SARATOGA LAKE + +CHAPTER XIII. VISITS TO NOTABLE PLACES + +CHAPTER XIV. LAKE GEORGE AND MOUNT McGREGOR + +CHAPTER XV. ADVENTURES AT VARIOUS SPRINGS + +CHAPTER XVI. AT A LAWN PARTY + +CHAPTER XVII. A TRIP TO SCHUYLERVILLE + +CHAPTER XVIII. THE SOCIAL SCIENCE MEETING + +CHAPTER XIX. ST. CHRISTINA'S HOME + +CHAPTER XX. AN ACCIDENT WITH RESULTS + + + + + A SORT OF PREFACE. + +WHICH IT IS NOT NECESSARY TO READ. + +When Josiah read my dedication he said "it wuz a shame to dedicate +a book that it had took most a hull bottle of ink to write, to a +lot of creeters that he wouldn't have in the back door yard." + +But I explained it to him, that I didn't mean tramps with broken +hats, variegated pantaloons, ventilated shirt-sleeves, and +barefooted. But I meant tramps with diamond ear-rings, and +cuff-buttons, and Saratoga trunks, and big accounts at their +bankers. + +And he said, "Oh, shaw!" + +But I went on nobly, onmindful of that shaw, as female pardners +have to be, if they accomplish all the talkin' they want to. + +And sez I, "It duz seem sort o' pitiful, don't it, to think how +sort o' homeless the Americans are a gettin'? How the posys that +blow under the winders of Home are left to waste their sweet +breaths amongst the weeds, while them that used to love 'em are a +climbin' mountain tops after strange nosegays." + +The smoke that curled up from the chimbleys, a wreathin' its way +up to the heavens -- all dead and gone. The bright light that +shone out of the winder through the dark a tellin' everybody that +there wuz a Home, and some one a waitin' for somebody -- all dark +and lonesome. + +Yes, the waiter and the waited for are all a rushin' round +somewhere, on the cars, mebby, or a yot, a chasin' Pleasure, that +like as not settled right down on the eves of the old house they +left, and stayed there. + +I wonder if they will find her there when they go back again. +Mebby they will, and then agin, mebby they won't. For Happiness +haint one to set round and lame herself a waitin' for folks to +make up their minds. + +Sometimes she looks folks full in the face, sort o' solemn like +and heart-searchin', and gives 'em a fair chance what they will +chuse. And then if they chuse wrong, shee'll turn her back to +'em, for always. I've hearn of jest such cases. + +But it duz seem sort o' solemn to think -- how the sweet restful +felin's that clings like ivy round the old familier door steps -- +where old 4 fathers feet stopped, and stayed there, and baby feet +touched and then went away -- I declare for't, it almost brings +tears, to think how that sweet clingin' vine of affection, and +domestic repose, and content -- how soon that vine gets tore up +nowadays. + +It is a sort of a runnin' vine anyway, and folks use it as sech, +they run with it. Jest as it puts its tendrils out to cling round +some fence post, or lilock bush, they pull it up, and start off +with it. And then its roots get dry, and it is some time before +it will begin to put out little shoots and clingin' leaves agin +round some petickular mountain top, or bureau or human bein'. And +then it is yanked up agin, poor little runnin' vine, and run with +-- and so on -- and so on -- and so on. + +Why sometimes it makes me fairly heart-sick to think on't. And I +fairly envy our old 4 fathers, who used to set down for several +hundred years in one spot. They used to get real rested, it must +be they did. + +Jacob now, settin' right by that well of his'n for pretty nigh two +hundred years. How much store he must have set by it during the +last hundred years of 'em! How attached he must have been to it! + +Good land! Where is there a well that one of our rich old +American patriarks will set down by for two years, leavin' off the +orts. There haint none, there haint no such a well. Our +patriarks haint fond of well water, anyway. + +And old Miss Abraham now, and Miss Isaac -- what stay to home +wimmen they wuz, and equinomical! + +What a good contented creeter Sarah Abraham wuz. How settled +down, and stiddy, stayin' right to home for hundreds of years. +Not gettin' rampent for a wider spear, not a coaxin' old Mr. +Abraham nights to take her to summer resorts, and winter hants of +fashion. + +No, old Mr. Abraham went to bed, and went to sleep for all of her. + +And when they did once in a hundred years, or so, make up their +minds to move on a mile or so, how easy they traveled. Mr. +Abraham didn't have to lug off ten or twelve wagon loads of +furniture to the Safe Deposit Company, and spend weeks and weeks a +settlin' his bisness, in Western lands, and Northern mines, +Southern railroads, and Eastern wildcat stocks, to get ready to +go. And Miss Abraham didn't have to have a dozen dress-makers in +the house for a month or two, and messenger boys, and dry goods +clerks, and have to stand and be fitted for basks and polenays, +and back drapery, and front drapery, and tea gowns, and dinner +gowns, and drivin' gowns, and mornin' gowns, and evenin' gowns, +and etectery, etcetery, etcetery. + +No, all the preperations she had to make wuz to wrop her mantilly +a little closter round her, and all Mr. Abraham had to do wuz to +gird up his lions. That is what it sez. And I don't believe it +would take much time to gird up a few lions, it don't seem to me +as if it would. + +And when these few simple preperations had been made, they jest +histed up their tent and laid it acrost a camel, and moved on a +mild or two, walkin' afoot. + +Why jest imagine if Miss Abraham had to travel with eight or ten +big Saratoga trunks, how could they have been got up onto that +camel? It couldn't lave been done. The camel would have died, +and old Mr. Abraham would also have expired a tryin' to lift 'em +up. No, it was all for the best. + +And jest think on't, for all of these simple, stay to home ways, +they called themselves Pilgrims and Sojourners. Good land! What +would they have thought nowadays to see folks make nothin' of +settin' off for China, or Japan or Jerusalem before breakfast. + +And what did they know of the hardships of civilization? Now to +sposen the case, sposen Miss Abraham had to live in New York +winters, and go to two or three big receptions every day, and to +dinner parties, and theatre parties, and operas and such like, +evenin's, and receive and return about three thousand calls, and +be on more 'n a dozen charitable boards (hard boards they be too, +some on 'em) and lots of other projects and enterprizes -- be on +the go the hull winter, with a dress so tight she couldn't breathe +instead of her good loose robes, and instead of her good +comfortable sandals have her feet upon high-heeled shoes pinchin' +her corns almost unto distraction. And then to Washington to go +all through it agin, and more too, and Florida, and Cuba; and then +to the sea-shore and have it all over agin with sea bathin' added. + +And then to the mountains, and all over agin with climbin' round +added. Then to Europe, with seas sickness, picture galleries, +etc., added. And so on home agin in the fall to begin it all over +agin. + +Why Miss Abraham would be so tuckered out before she went half +through with one season, that she would be a dead 4 mother. + +And Mr. Abraham -- why one half hour down at the stock exchange +would have been too much for that good old creeter. The yells and +cries, and distracted movements of the crowd of Luker Gatherers +there, would have skairt him to death. He never would have lived +to follow Miss Abraham round from pillow to post through summer +and winter seasons -- he wouldn't have lived to waltz, or +toboggen, or suffer other civilized agonies. No, he would have +been a dead patriark. And better off so, I almost think. + +Not but what I realize that civilization has its advantages. Not +but what I know that if Mr. Abraham wanted Miss Abraham to part +his hair straight, or clean off his phylackrity when she happened +to be out a pickin' up manny, he couldn't stand on one side of his +tent and telephone to bring her back, but had to yell at her. + +And I realize fully that if one of his herd got strayed off into +another county, they hadn't no telegraf to head it off, but the +old man had to poke off through rain or sun, and hunt it up +himself. And he couldn't set down cross-legged in front of his +tent in the mornin', and read what happened on the other side of +the world, the evenin' before. + +And I know that if he wanted to set down some news, they had to +kill a sheep, and spend several years a dressin' off the hide into +parchment -- and kill a goose, or chase it up till they wuz beat +out, for a goose-quill. + +And then after about 20 years or so, they could put it down that +Miss Isaac had got a boy -- the boy, probably bein' a married man +himself and a father when the news of his birth wuz set down. + +I realize this, and also the great fundimental fact that underlies +all philosophies, that you can't set down and stand up at the same +time -- and that no man, however pure and lofty his motives may +be, can't lean up against a barn door, and walk off simultanious. +And if he don't walk off, then the great question comes in, How +will he get there? And he feels lots of times that he must stand +up so's to bring his head up above the mullien and burdock stalks, +amongst which he is a settin', and get a wider view-a broader +horizeon. And he feels lots of time, that he must get there. + +This is a sort of a curius world, and it makes me feel curius a +good deal of the time as we go through it. But we have to make +allowances for it, for the old world is on a tramp, too. It can't +seem to stop a minute to oil up its old axeltrys -- it moves on, +and takes us with it. It seems to be in a hurry. + +Everything seems to be in a hurry here below. And some say Heaven +is a place of continual sailin' round and goin' up and up all the +time. But while risin' up and soarin' is a sweet thought to me, +still sometimes I love to think that Heaven is a place where I can +set down, and set for some time. + +I told Josiah so (waked him up, for he wuz asleep), and he said he +sot more store on the golden streets, and the wavin' palms, and +the procession of angels. (And then he went to sleep agin.) + +But I don't feel so. I'd love, as I say, to jest set down for +quite a spell, and set there, to be kinder settled down and to +home with them whose presence makes a home anywhere. I wouldn't +give a cent to sail round unless I wuz made to know it wuz my duty +to sail. Josiah wants to. + +But, as I say, everybody is in a hurry. Husbands can't hardly +find time to keep up a acquaintance with their wives. Fathers +don't have no time to get up a intimate acquaintance with their +children. Mothers are in such a hurry -- babys are in such a +hurry -- that they can't scarcely find time to be born. And I +declare for't, it seems sometimes as if folks don't want to take +time to die. + +The old folks at home wait with faithful, tired old eyes for the +letter that don't come, for the busy son or daughter hasn't time +to write it -- no, they are too busy a tearin' up the running vine +of affection and home love, and a runnin' with it. + +Yes, the hull nation is in a hurry to get somewhere else, to go +on, it can't wait. It is a trampin' on over the Western slopes, a +trampin' over red men, and black men, and some white men a +hurryin' on to the West -- hurryin' on to the sea. And what then? + +Is there a tide of restfulness a layin' before it? Some cool +waters of repose where it will bathe its tired forward, and its +stun-bruised feet, and set there for some time? + +I don't s'pose so. I don't s'pose it is in its nater to. I +s'pose it will look off longingly onto the far off somewhere that +lays over the waters -- beyend the sunset. + + + JOSIAH ALLEN'S WIFE. +NEW YORK, June, 1887. + + + + +I. + +SAMANTHA AT SARATOGA. + + +The idee on't come to me one day about sundown, or a little before +sundown. I wuz a settin' in calm peace, and a big rockin' chair +covered with a handsome copperplate, a readin' what the Sammist +sez about "Vanity, vanity, all is vanity." The words struck deep, +and as I said, it was jest that very minute that the idee struck +me about goin' to Saratoga. Why I should have had the idee at +jest that minute, I can't tell, nor Josiah can't. We have talked +about it sense. + +But good land! such creeters as thoughts be never wuz, nor never +will be. They will creep in, and round, and over anything, and +get inside of your mind (entirely unbeknown to you) at any time. +Curious, haint it? -- How you may try to hedge 'em out, and shet +the doors and everything. But they will creep up into your mind, +climb up and draw up their ladders, and there they will be, and +stalk round independent as if they owned your hull head; curious! + +Well, there the idee wuz -- I never knew nothin' about it, nor how +it got there. But there it wuz, lookin' me right in the face of +my soul, kinder pert and saucy, sayin', "You'd better go to +Saratoga next summer; you and Josiah." + +But I argued with it. Sez I, "What should we go to Saratoga for? +None of the relations live there on my side, or on hison; why +should we go?" + +But still that idee kep' a hantin me; "You'd better go to Saratoga +next summer, you and Josiah." And it whispered, "Mebby it will +help Josiah's corns." (He is dretful troubled with corns.) And +so the idee kep' a naggin' me, it nagged me for three days and +three nights before I mentioned it to my Josiah. And when I did, +he scorfed at the idee. He said, "The idee of water curing them +dumb corns -- " + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen, stranger things have been done;" sez I, +"that water is very strong. It does wonders." + +And he scorfed agin and sez, "Don't you believe faith could cure +em?" + +Sez I, "If it wuz strong enough it could." + +But the thought kep a naggin' me stiddy, and then -- here is the +curious part of it -- the thought nagged me, and I nagged Josiah, +or not exactly nagged; not a clear nag; I despise them, and always +did. But I kinder kep' it before his mind from day to day, and +from hour to hour. And the idee would keep a tellin' me things +and I would keep a tellin' 'em to my companion. The idee would +keep a sayin' to me, "It is one of the most beautiful places in +our native land. The waters will help you, the inspirin' music, +and elegance and gay enjoyment you will find there, will sort a +uplift you. You had better go there on a tower;" and agin it sez, +"Mebby it will help Josiah's corns." + +And old Dr. Gale a happenin' in at about that time, I asked him +about it (he doctored me when I wuz a baby, and I have helped 'em +for years. Good old creetur, he don't get along as well as he ort +to. Loontown is a healthy place.) I told him about my strong +desire to go to Saratoga, and I asked him plain if he thought the +water would help my pardner's corns. And he looked dreadful wise +and he riz up and walked across the floor 2 and fro several times, +probably 3 times to, and the same number of times fro, with his +arms crossed back under the skirt of his coat and his eyebrows +knit in deep thought, before he answered me. Finely he said, that +modern science had not fully demonstrated yet the direct bearing +of water on corn. In some cases it might and probably did +stimulate 'em to greater luxuriance, and then again a great flow +of water might retard their growth. + +Sez I, anxiously, "Then you'd advise me to go there with him?" + +"Yes," sez he, "on the hull, I advise you to go." + +Them words I reported to Josiah, and sez I in anxious axents, "Dr. +Gale advises us to go." + +And Josiah sez, "I guess I shan't mind what that old fool sez." + +Them wuz my pardner's words, much as I hate to tell on 'em. But +from day to day I kep' it stiddy before him, how dang'r'us it wuz +to go ag'inst a doctor's advice. And from day to day he would +scorf at the plan. And I, ev'ry now and then, and mebby oftener, +would get him a extra good meal, and attack him on the subject +immegatly afterwards. But all in vain. And I see that when he +had that immovible sotness onto him, one extra meal wouldn't +soften or molify him. No, I see plain I must make a more voyalent +effort. And I made it. For three stiddy days I put before that +man the best vittles that these hands could make, or this brain +could plan. + +And at the end of the 3d day I gently tackled him agin on the +subject, and his state wuz such, bland, serene, happified, that he +consented without a parlay. And so it wuz settled that the next +summer we wuz to go to Saratoga. And he began to count on it and +make preparation in a way that I hated to see. + +Yes, from the very minute that our two minds wuz made up to go to +Saratoga Josiah Allen wuz set on havin' sunthin new and uneek in +the way of dress and whiskers. I looked coldly on the idee of +puttin' a gay stripe down the legs of the new pantaloons I made +for him, and broke it up, also a figured vest. I went through +them two crisises and came out triumphent. + +Then he went and bought a new bright pink necktie with broad long +ends which he intended to have float out, down the front of his +vest. And I immegatly took it for the light-colored blocks in my +silk log-cabin bedquilt. Yes, I settled the matter of that pink +neck-gear with a high hand and a pair of shears. And Josiah sez +now that he bought it for that purpose, for the bedquilt, because +he loves to see a dressy quilt, -- sez he always enjoys seein' a +cabin look sort o' gay. But good land! he didn't. He intended +and calculated to wear that neck-tie into Saratoga, -- a sight for +men and angels, if I hadn't broke it up. + +But in the matter of whiskers, there I was powerless. He trimmed +'em (unbeknow to me) all off the side of his face, them good +honerable side whiskers of hisen, that had stood by him for years +in solemnity and decency, and begun to cultivate a little patch on +the end of his chin. I argued with him, and talked well on the +subject, eloquent, but it wuz of no use, I might as well have +argued with the wind in March. + +He said, he wuz bound on goin' into Saratoga with a fashionable +whisker, come what would. + +And then I sithed, and he sez, -- " You have broke up my pantaloons, +my vest, and my neck-tie, you have ground me down onto plain +broadcloth, but in the matter of whiskers I am firm! Yes!" sez he +"on these whiskers I take my stand!" + +And agin I sithed heavy, and I sez in a dretful impressive way, as +I looked on 'em, "Josiah Allen, remember you are a father and a +grandfather!" + +And he sez firmly, "If I wuz a great-grandfather I would trim my +whiskers in jest this way, that is if I wuz a goin' to set up to +be fashionable and a goin' to Saratoga for my health." + +And I groaned kinder low to myself, and kep' hopin' that mebby +they wouldn't grow very fast, or that some axident would happen to +'em, that they would get afire or sunthin'. But they didn't. And +they grew from day to day luxurient in length, but thin. And his +watchful care kep' 'em from axident, and I wuz too high princepled +to set fire to 'em when he wuz asleep, though sometimes, on a +moonlight night, I was tempted to, sorely tempted. + +But I didn't, and they grew from day to day, till they wuz the +curiusest lookin' patch o' whiskers that I ever see. And when we +sot out for Saratoga, they wuz jest about as long as a shavin' +brush, and looked some like one. There wuz no look of a +class-leader, and a perfesser about 'em, and I told him so. But +he worshiped 'em, and gloried in the idee of goin' afar to show +'em off. + +But the neighbors received the news that we wuz goin' to a +waterin' place coldly, or with ill-concealed envy. + +Uncle Jonas Bently told us he shouldn't think we would want to go +round to waterin' troughs at our age. + +And I told him it wuzn't a waterin' trough, and if it wuz, I +thought our age wuz jest as good a one as any, to go to it. + +He had the impression that Saratoga wuz a immense waterin' trough +where the country all drove themselves summers to be watered. He +is deef as a Hemlock post, and I yelled up at him jest as loud as +I dast for fear of breakin' open my own chest, that the water got +into us, instid of our gettin' into the water, but I didn't make +him understand, for I hearn afterwards of his sayin' that, as nigh +as he could make out we all got into the waterin' trough and wuz +watered. + +The school teacher, a young man, with long, small lims, and some +pimpley on the face, but well meanin', he sez to me: "Saratoga is +a beautiful spah." + +And I sez warmly, "It aint no such thing, it is a village, for I +have seen a peddler who went right through it, and watered his +horses there, and he sez it is a waterin' place, and a village." + +"Yes," sez he, "it is a beautiful village, a modest retiren city, +and at the same time it is the most noted spah on this continent." + +I wouldn't contend with him for it wuz on the stoop of the meetin' +house, and I believe in bein' reverent. But I knew it wuzn't no +"spah," -- that had a dreadful flat sound to me. And any way I +knew I should face its realities soon and know all about it. Lots +of wimen said that for anybody who lived right on the side of a +canal, and had two good, cisterns on the place, and a well, they +didn't see why I should feel in a sufferin' condition for any more +water; and if I did, why didn't I ketch rain water? + +Such wuz some of the deep arguments they brung up aginst my +embarkin' on this enterprise, they talked about it sights and +sights; -- why, it lasted the neighbors for a stiddy conversation, +till along about the middle of the winter. Then the Minister's +wife bought a new alpacky dress -- unbeknown to the church till it +wuz made up -- and that kind o' drawed their minds off o' me for a +spell. + +Aunt Polly Pixley wuz the only one who received the intelligence +gladly. And she thought she would go too. She had been kinder +run down and most bed rid for years. And she had a idee the water +might help her. And I encouraged Aunt Polly in the idee, for she +wuz well off. Yes, Mr. and Miss Pixley wuz very well off though +they lived in a little mite of a dark, low, lonesome house, with +some tall Pollard willows in front of the door in a row, and jest +acrost the road from a grave-yard. + +Her husband had been close and wuzn't willin' to have any other +luxury or means of recreation in the house only a bass viol, that +had been his father's -- he used to play on that for hours and +hours. I thought that wuz one reason why Polly wuz so nervous. I +said to Josiah that it would have killed me outright to have that +low grumblin' a goin' on from day to day, and to look at them tall +lonesome willows and grave stuns. + +But, howsumever, Polly's husband had died durin' the summer, and +Polly parted with the bass viol the day after the funeral. She +got out some now, and wuz quite wrought up with the idee of goin' +to Saratoga. + +But Sister Minkley; sister in the church and sister-in-law by +reason of Wbitefield, sez to me, that she should think I would +think twice before I danced and waltzed round waltzes. + +And I sez, "I haint thought of doin' it, I haint thought of +dancin' round or square or any other shape." + +Sez she, "You have got to, if you go to Saratoga." + +Sez I, "Not while life remains in this frame." + +And old Miss Bobbet came up that minute -- it wuz in the store +that we were a talkin' -- and sez she, "It seems to me, Josiah +Allen's wife, that you are too old to wear low-necked dresses and +short sleeves." + +"And I should think you'd take cold a goin' bareheaded," sez Miss +Luman Spink who wuz with her. + +Sez I, lookin' at 'em coldly, "Are you lunys or has softness begun +on your brains?" + +"Why," sez they, "you are talking about goin' to Saratoga, hain't +you?" + +"Yes," sez I. + +"Well then you have got to wear 'em," says Miss Bobbet. "They +don't let anybody inside of the incorporation without they have +got on a low-necked dress and short sleeves." + +"And bare-headed," sez Miss Spink; "if they have' got a thing on +their heads they won't let 'em in." + +Sez I, "I don't believe it" + +Sez Miss Bobbet, "It is so, for I hearn it, and hearn it straight. +James Robbets's wife's sister had a second cousin who lived +neighbor to a woman whose niece had been there, been right there +on the spot. And Celestine Bobbet, Uncle Ephraim's Celestine, +hearn it from James'es wife when she wuz up there last spring, it +come straight. They all have to go in low necks." + +"And not a mite of anything on their heads," says Miss Spink. + +Sez I in sarcastical axents, "Do men have to go in low necks too?" + +"No," says Miss Bobbet. "But they have to have the tails of their +coats kinder pinted. Why," sez she, "I hearn of a man that had +got clear to the incorporation and they wouldn't let him in +because his coat kinder rounded off round the bottom, so he went +out by the side of the road and pinned up his coat tails, into a +sort of a pinted shape, and good land the incorporation let him +right in, and never said a word." + +I contended that these things wuzn't so, but I found it wuz the +prevailin' opinion. For when I went to see the dressmaker about +makin' me a dress for the occasion, I see she felt just like the +rest about it. My dress wuz a good black alpacky. I thought I +would have it begun along in the edge of the winter, when she +didn't have so much to do, and also to have it done on time. We +laid out to start on the follerin' July, and I felt that I wanted +everything ready. + +I bought the dress the 7th day of November early in the forenoon, +the next day after my pardner consented to go, and give 65 cents a +yard for it, double wedth. I thought I could get it done on time, +dressmakers are drove a good deal. But I felt that a dressmaker +could commence a dress in November and get it done the follerin' +July, without no great strain bein' put onto her; and I am fur +from bein' the one to put strains onto wimmen, and hurry 'em +beyend their strength. But I felt Almily had time to make it on +honor and with good buttonholes. + +"Well," she sez, the first thing after she had unrolled the +alpacky, and held it up to the light to see if it was firm -- sez +she: + +"I s'pose you are goin' to have it made with a long train, and low +neck and short sleeves, and the waist all girted down to a taper?" + +I wuz agast at the idee, and to think Alminy should broach it to +me, and I give her a piece of my mind that must have lasted her +for days and days. It wuz a long piece, and firm as iron. But +she is a woman who likes to have the last word and carry out her +own idees, and she insisted that nobody was allowed in Saratoga -- +that they wuz outlawed, and laughed at if they didn't have trains +and low necks, and little mites of waists no bigger than +pipe-stems. + +Sez I, "Alminy Hagidone, do you s'pose that I, a woman of my age, +and a member of the meetin' house, am a goin' to wear a low-necked +dress?" + +"Why not?," sez she, "it is all the fashion and wimmen as old agin +as you be wear 'em." + +Well, sez I, "It is a shame and a disgrace if they do, to say +nothin' of the wickedness of it. Who do you s'pose wants to see +their old skin and bones? It haint nothin' pretty anyway. And as +fer the waists bein' all girted up and drawed in, that is nothin' +but crushed bones and flesh and vitals, that is just crowdin' down +your insides into a state o' disease and deformity, torturin' your +heart down so's the blood can't circulate, and your lungs so's you +can't breathe, it is nothin' but slow murder anyway, and if I ever +take it into my head to kill myself, Alminy Hagidone, I haint a +goin' to do it in a way of perfect torture and torment to me, I'd +ruther be drownded." + +She quailed, and I sez, "I am one that is goin' to take good long +breaths to the very last." She see I wuz like iron aginst the +idee of bein' drawed in, and tapered, and she desisted. I s'pose +I did look skairful. But she seemed still to cling to the idee of +low necks and trains, and she sez sort a rebukingly: + +"You ortn't to go to Saratoga if you haint willin' to do as the +rest do. I spose," sez she dreamily, "the streets are full of +wimmen a walkin' up and down with long trains a hangin' down and +sweepin' the streets, and ev'ry one on 'em with low necks and +short sleeves, and all on 'em a flirting with some man" + +"Truly," sez I, "if that is so, that is why the idee come to me. +I am needed there. I have a high mission to perform about. But I +don't believe it is so." + +"Then you won't have it made with a long train?" sez she, a holdin' +up a breadth of the alpacky in front of me, to measure the skirt. + +"No mom!" sez I, and there wuz both dignity and deep resolve in +that "mom." It wuz as firm and stern principled a "mom" as I ever +see, though I say it that shouldn't. And I see it skairt her. +She measured off the breadths kinder trembly, and seemed so +anxious to pacify me that she got it a leetle shorter in the back +than it wuz in the front. And (for the same reason) it fairly +clicked me in the neck it wuz so high, and the sleeves wuz that +long that I told Josiah Allen (in confidence) I was tempted to +knit some loops across the bottom of 'em and wear 'em for mits. + +But I didn't, and I didn't change the dress neither. Thinkses I, +mebby it will have a good moral effect on them other old wimmen +there. Thinkses I, when they see another woman melted and +shortened and choked fur principle's sake, mebby they will pause +in their wild careers. + +Wall, this wuz in November, and I wuz to have the dress, if it wuz +a possible thing, by the middle of April, so's to get it home in +time to sew some lace in the neck. And so havin' everything +settled about goin' I wuz calm in my frame most all the time, and +so wuz my pardner. + +And right here, let me insert this one word of wisdom for the +special comfort of my sect and yet it is one that may well be laid +to heart by the more opposite one. If your pardner gets restless +and oneasy and middlin' cross, as pardners will be anon, or even +oftener -- start them off on a tower. A tower will in 9 cases out +of 10 lift 'em out of their oneasiness, their restlessness and +their crossness. + +Why this is so I cannot tell, no more than I can explain other +mysteries of creation, but I know it is so. I know they will come +home more placider, more serener, and more settled-downer. Why I +have known a short tower to Slab City or Loontown act like a charm +on my pardner, when crossness wuz in his mean and snappishness wuz +present with him. I have known him to set off with the mean of a +lion and come back with the liniment of a lamb. Curious, haint +it? + +And jest the prospect of a tower ahead is a great help to a woman +in rulin' and keepin' a pardner straight and right in his +liniments and his acts. Somehow jest the thought of a tower sort +a lifts him up in mind, and happifys him, and makes him easier to +quell, and pardners must be quelled at times, else there would be +no livin' with 'em. This is known to all wimmen companions and +and men too. Great great is the mystery of pardners. + + + + +II. + +ARDELLA TUTT AND HER MOTHER. + + +But to resoom and continue on. I was a settin' one day, after it +wuz all decided, and plans laid on; I wuz a settin' by the fire a +mendin' one of Josiah's socks. I wuz a settin' there, as soft and +pliable in my temper as the woosted I wuz a darnin' 'em with, my +Josiah at the same time a peacefelly sawin' wood in the +wood-house, when I heard a rap at the door and I riz up and opened +it, and there stood two perfect strangers, females. I, with a +perfect dignity and grace (and with the sock still in my left +hand) asked 'em to set down, and consequently they sot. Then +ensued a slight pause durin' which my two gray eyes roamed over +the females before me. + +The oldest one wuz very sharp in her face and had a pair of small +round eyes that seemed when they were sot onto you to sort a bore +into you like two gimlets. Her nose was very sharp and defient, +as if it wuz constantly sayin' to itself, "I am a nose to be +looked up to, I am a nose to be respected, and feared if +necessary." Her chin said the same thing, and her lips which wuz +very thin, and her elbow, which wuz very sharp. + +Her dress was a stiff sort of a shinin' poplin, made tight acrost +the chest and elboes. And her hat had some stiff feathers in it +that stood up straight and sort a sharp lookin'. She had a long +sharp breast-pin sort a stabbed in through the front of her stiff +standin' collar, and her knuckles sot out through her firm lisle +thread gloves, her umberell wuz long and wound up hard, to that +extent I have never seen before nor sense. She wuz, take it all +in all, a hard sight, and skairful. + +The other one wuzn't no more like her in looks than a soft fat +young cabbage head is like the sharp bean pole that it grows up by +the side on, in the same garden. She wuz soft in her complexion, +her lips, her cheeks, her hands, and as I mistrusted at that first +minute, and found out afterwards, soft in her head too. Her dress +wuz a loose-wove parmetty, full in the waist and sort a drabbly +round the bottom. Her hat wuz drab-colored felt with some loose +ribbon bows a hangin' down on it, and some soft ostridge tips. +She had silk mits on and her hands wuz fat and kinder +moist-lookin'. Her eyes wuz very large and round, and blue, and +looked sort o' dreamy and wanderin' and there wuz a kind of a +wrapped smile on her face all the time. She had a roll of paper +in her hand and I didn't dislike her looks a mite. + +Finally the oldest female opened her lips, some as a steel trap +would open sudden and kinder sharp, and sez she: "I am Miss Deacon +Tutt, of Tuttville, and this is my second daughter Ardelia. +Cordelia is my oldest, and I have 4 younger than Ardelia." + +I bowed real polite and said, "I wuz glad to make the acquaintance +of the hull 7 on 'em." I can be very genteel when I set out, +almost stylish. + +"I s'pose," says she, "I am talkin' to Josiah Allen's wife?" + +I gin her to understand that that wuz my name and my station, and +she went on, and sez she: "I have hearn on you through my +husband's 2d cousin, Cephas Tutt." + +"Cephas," sez she, "bein' wrote to by me on the subject of +Ardelia, the same letter containin' seven poems of hern, and on +bein' asked to point out the quickest way to make her name and +fame known to the world at large, wrote back that he havin' always +dealt in butter and lard, wuzn't up to the market price in poetry, +and that you would be a good one to go to for advice. And so," +sez she a pointin' to a bag she carried on her arm (a hard lookin' +bag made of crash with little bullets and knobs of embroidery on +it), "and so we took this bag full of Ardelia's poetry and come on +the mornin' train, Cephas'es letter havin' reached us at nine +o'clock last night. I am a woman of business." + +The bag would hold about 4 quarts and it wuz full. I looked at it +and sithed. + +"I see," sez she, "that you are sorry that we didn't bring more +poetry with us. But we thought that this little batch would give +you a idee of what a mind she has, what a glorious, soarin' genus +wuz in front of you, and we could bring more the next time we +come." + +I sithed agin, three times, but Miss Tutt didn't notice 'em a mite +no more'n they'd been giggles or titters. She wouldn't have took +no notice of them. She wuz firm and decided doin' her own errent, +and not payin' no attention to anything, nor anybody else. + +"Ardelia, read the poem you have got under your arm to Miss Allen! +The bag wuz full of her longer ones," sez she, "but I felt that I +must let you hear her poem on spring. It is a gem. I felt it +would be wrongin' you, not to give you that treat. Read it +Ardelia." + +I see Ardelia wuz used to obeyin' her ma. She opened the sheet to +once, and begun. + +Jest the minute Ardelia stopped readin' Miss Tatt says proudly: +"There! haint that a remarkable poem,?" + +Sez I, calmly, "Yes it is a remarkable one." + +"Did you ever hear anything like it?" says she, triumphly. + +"No," sez I honestly, "I never did." + +"Ardelia, read the poem on Little Ardelia Cordelia; give Miss +Allen the treat of hearin' that beautiful thing." + +I sort a sithed low to myself; it wuz more of a groan than a +common sithe, but Miss Tutt didn't heed it, she kep' right on -- + +"I have always brought up my children to make other folks happy, +all they can, and in rehearsin' this lovely and remarkable poem, +Ardelia will be not only makin' you perfectly happy, givin' you a +rich intellectual feast, that you can't often have, way out here +in the country, fur from Tuttville; but she will also be attendin' +to the business that brought us here. I have always fetched my +children up to combine joy and business; weld 'em together like +brass and steel. Ardelia, begin!" + +So Ardelia commenced agin'. It wuz wrote on a big sheet of paper +and a runnin' vine wuz a runnin' all 'round the edge of the paper, +made with a pen. + +Jest as soon as Ardelia stopped rehearsin' the verses, Miss Tutt +sez agin to me: + +"Haint that a most remarkable poem?" + +And agin I sez calmly, and trutbfully, "Yes, it is a very +remarkable one!" + +"And now," sez Miss Tutt, plungin' her hand in the bag, and +drawin' out a sheet of paper, "to convince you that Ardelia has +always had this divine gift of poesy -- that it is not, all the +effect of culture and high education -- let me read to you a poem +she wrote when she wuz only a mere child," and Miss Tutt read: + + "LINES ON A CAT + + "WRITTEN BY ARDELIA TUTT, + "At the age of fourteen years, two months and eight days. + + "Oh Cat! Sweet Tabby cat of mine; + 6 months of age has passed o'er thee, + And I would not resign, resign + The pleasure that I find in you. + Dear old cat!" + +"Don't you think," sez Miss Tutt, "that this poem shows a fund of +passion, a reserve power of passion and constancy, remarkable in +one so young?" + +"Yes," sez I reasonably, "no doubt she liked the cat. And," sez +I, wantin' to say somethin' pleasant and agreeable to her, "no +doubt it was a likely cat." + +"Oh the cat itself is of miner importance," sez Miss Tutt. "We +will fling the cat to the winds. It's of my daughter I would +speak. I simply handled the cat to show the rare precocious +intellect. Oh! how it gushed out in the last line in the +unconquerable burst of repressed passion -- `Dear old cat!' +Shakespeare might have wrote that line, do you not think so?" + +"No doubt he might," sez I, calmly, "but he didn't." + +I see she looked mad and I hastened to say: "He wuzn't aquainted +with the cat." + +She looked kinder mollyfied and continued: + +"Ardelia dashes off things with a speed that would astonish a mere +common writer. Why she dashed off thirty-nine verses once while +she wuz waitin' for the dish water to bile, and sent 'em right off +to the printer, without glancin' at 'em agin.' + +"I dare say so," sez I, "I should judge so by the sound on 'em." + +"Out of envy and jealousy, the rankest envy, and the shearest +jealousy, them verses wuz sent back with the infamous request that +she should use 'em for curl papers. But she sot right down and +wrote forty-eight verses on a `Cruel Request,' wrote 'em inside of +eighteen minutes. She throws off things, Ardelia does, in half an +hour, that it would take other poets, weeks and weeks to write." + +"I persume so," sez I, "I dare persume to say, they never could +write 'em." + +"And now," sez Miss Tutt, "the question is, will you put Ardelia +on the back of that horse that poets ride to glory on? Will you +lift her onto the back of that horse, and do it at once? I +require nothin' hard of you," sez she, a borin' me through and +through with her eyes. "It must be a joy to you, Josiah Allen's +wife, a rare joy, to be the means of bringin' this rare genius +before the public. I ask nothin' hard of you, I only ask that you +demand, demand is the right word, not ask; that would be grovelin' +trucklin' folly, but demand that the public that has long ignored +my daugther Ardelia's claim to a seat amongst the immortal poets, +demand them, compel them to pause, to listen, and then seat her +there, up, up on the highest, most perpendiciler pinnacle of +fame's pillow. Will you do this?" + +I sat in deep dejection and my rockin' chair, and knew not what to +say -- and Miss Tutt went on: + +"We demand more than fame, deathless, immortal fame for 'em. We +want money, wealth for 'em, and want it at once! We want it for +extra household expenses, luxuries, clothing, jewelry, charity, +etc. If we enrich the world with this rare genius, the world must +enrich us with its richest emmolients. Will you see that we have +it! Will you at once do as I asked you to? Will you seat her +immegately where I want her sot? + +Sez I, considerin', "I can't get her up there alone, I haint +strong enough." Sez I, sort a mekanikly, "I have got the +rheumatez." + +"So you scoff me do you? I came to you to get bread, am I to get +worse than a stun -- a scoff?" + +"I haint gin you no scoff," sez I, a spunkin' up a little, "I +haint thought on it. I like Ardelia and wish her well, but I +can't do merikles, I can't compel the public to like things if +they don't." + +Sez Miss Tutt, "You are jealous of her, you hate her." + +"No, I don't," sez I, "I haint jealous of her, and I like her +looks first-rate. I love a pretty young girl," sez I candidly, +"jest as I love a fresh posy with the dew still on it, a dainty +rose-bud with the sweet fragrance layin' on its half-folded heart. +I love 'em," sez I, a beginnin' to eppisode a little unbeknown to +me, "I love 'em jest as I love the soft unbroken silence of the +early spring mornin', the sun all palely tinted with rose and +blue, and the earth alayin' calm and unwoke-up, fresh and fair. I +love such a mornin' and such a life, for itself and for the +unwritten prophecis in it. And when I see genius in such a sweet, +young life, why it makes me feel as it duz to see through all the +tender prophetic beauty of the mornin' skies, a big white dove a +soarin' up through the blue heavens." + +Sez Miss Tutt, "You see that in Ardelia, but you wont own it, you +know you do." + +"No!" sez I, "I would love to tell you that I see it in Ardelia; I +would honest, but I can't look into them mornin' skies and say I +see a white dove there, when I don't see nothin' more than a plump +pullet, a jumpin' down from the fence or a pickin' round calmly in +the back door-yard. Jest as likely the hen is, as the white dove, +jest as honerable, but you mustn't confound the two together." + +"A hen," sez Miss Tutt bitterly. "To confound my Ardelia with a +hen! And I don't think there wuz ever a more ironieler `hen' than +that wuz, or a scornfuller one." + +"Why," sez I reasonably. "Hens are necessary and useful in any +position, both walkin' and settin', and layin'. You can't get'em +in any position hardly, but what they are useful and respectable, +only jest flyin'. Hens can't fly. Their wings haint shaped for +it. They look some like a dove's wings on the outside, the same +feathers, the same way of stretchin' 'em out. But there is +sunthin lackin' in 'em, some heaven-given capacity for soarin' an +for flight that the hens don't have. And it makes trouble, sights +and sights of trouble when hens try to fly, try to, and can't! + +"At the same time it is hard for a dove to settle down in a back +yard and stay there, hard and tegus. She can and duz sometimes, +but never till after her wings have been clipped in some way. +Poor little dove! I am always sorry for 'em to see 'em a walkin' +round there, a wantin' to fly -- a not forgettin' how it seemed to +have their wings soarin' up through the clear sky, and the rush of +the pure liquid windwaves a sweepin' aginst 'em, as they riz up, +up, in freedom, and happiness, and glory. Poor little creeters. + +"Yes, but doves can, if you clip their wings, settle down and +walk, but hens CAN'T fly, not for any length of time they can't. +No amount of stimulatin' poultices applied to the ends of their +tail feathers and wings can ever make 'em fly. They can't; it +haint their nater. They can make nests, and fill them with pretty +downy chicks, they can be happy and beautiful in life and mean; +they can spend their lives in jest as honerable and worthy a way +as if they wuz a flyin' round, and make a good honerable +appearance from day to day, till they begin to flop their wings, +and fly -- then their mean is not beautiful and inspirin'; no, it +is fur from it. It is tuff to see 'em, tuff to see the floppin', +tuff to see their vain efforts to soar through the air, tuff to +see 'em fall percepitously down onto the ground agin. For they +must come there in the end; they are morally certain to. + +"Now Ardelia is a sweet pretty lookin' girl, she can set down in a +cushioned arm-chair by a happy fireside, with pretty baby faces a +clusterin' around her and some man's face like the sun a +reflectin' back the light of her happy heart. But she can't sit +up on the pinnacle of fame's pillow. I don't believe she can ever +get up there, I don't. Honestly speakin', I don't." + +"Envy!" sez Miss Tutt, "glarin', shameless envy! You don't want +Ardelia to rise! You don't want her to mount that horse I spoke +of; you don't want to own that you see genius in her. But you do, +Josiah Allen's wife, you know you do -- " + +"No," sez I, "I don't see it. I see the sweetness of pretty +girlhood, the beauty and charm of openin' life, but I don't see +nothin' else, I don't, honest. I don't believe she has got +genius," sez I, "seein' you put the question straight to me and +depend a answer; seein' her future career depends on her choice +now, I must tell you that I believe she would succeed better in +the millionary trade or the mantilly maker's than she will in +tryin' to mount the horse you speak on. + +"Why," sez I, candidly, "some folks can't get up on that horse, +their legs haint strong enough. And if they do manage to get on, +it throws 'em, and they lay under the heels for life. I don't +want to see Ardelia there, I don't want to see her maimed and +lamed and stunted so early in the mornin' of life, by a kick from +that animal, for she can't ride it," sez I, "honestly she can't. + +"There is nothin' so useless in life, and so sort a wearin' as to +be a lookin' for sunthin' that haint there. And when you pretend +it is there when it haint, you are addin' iniquity to uselessness; +so if you'll take my advice, the advice of a wellwisher, you will +stop lookin', for I tell you plain that it haint there." + +Sez Miss Tutt, "Josiah Allen's wife, you have for reasens best +known to your conscience baulked my hopes of a speedy immortality. +You have willfully tried to break down my hopes of an immense, +immediate income to flow out of them poems for luxuries, jewelry, +charity, etc. But I can at least claim this at your hands, I +demand honesty. Tell me honestly what you yourself think of them +poems." + +Sez I (gettin' up sort a quick and goin' into the buttery, and +bringin' out a little basket), "Here are some beautiful sweet +apples, won't you have one?" + +"Apples, at such a time as this;" sez Miss Tutt + +"When the slumberin' world trembles before the advancin' tread of +a new poet -- When the heavens are listenin' intently to ketch the +whispers of an Ardelia's fate -- Sweet apples! in such a time as +this!" sez she. But she took two. + +"I demand the truth," sez she. "And you are a base, trucklin' +coward, if you give it not." + +Sez I, tryin' to carry off the subject and the apples into the +buttery; "Poetry ort to have pains took with it." + +"Jealousy!" sez Miss Tutt. "Jealousy might well whisper this. +Envy, rank envy might breathe the suspicion that Ardelia haint +been took pains with. But I can see through it," sez she. "I can +see through it." + +"Well," sez I, wore out, "if they belonged to me, and if she wuz +my girl, I would throw the verses into the fire, and set her to a +trade." + +She stood for a minute and bored me through and through with them +eyes. Why it seemed as if there wuz two holes clear through my +very spirit, and sole; she partly lifted that fearful lookin' +umberell as if to pierce me through and through; it wuz a fearful +seen. + +At last she turned, and flung the apple she wuz a holdin' onto the +floor at my feet -- and sez she, "I scorn 'em, and you too." And +she kinder stomped her feet and sez, "I fling off the dust I have +gethered here, at your feet." + +Now my floor wuz clean and looked like yeller glass, almost, it +wuz so shinin' and spotless, and I resented the idee of her sayin' +that she collected dust off from it. But I didn't say nothin' +back. She had the bag of poetry on her arm, and I didn't feel +like addin' any more to her troubles. + +But Ardelia, after her mother had swept out ahead, turned round +and held out her hand, and smiled a sweet but ruther of a +despondent and sorrowful smile, and I kissed her warmly. I like +Ardelia. And what I said, I said for her good, and she knew it. +I like Ardelia. + +Well, Miss Tutt and Ardelia went from our house to Eben Pixley's. +They are distant relatives of hern, and live about 3 quarters of a +mile from us. The Pixleys think everything of Ardelia but they +can't bear her mother. There has been difficulties in the family. + +But Ardelia stayed there mor'n two weeks right along. She haint +very happy to home I believe. And before she went back home it +wuz arranged that she should teach the winter's school and board +to Miss Pixley's. But Miss Pixley wuz took sick with the tyfus +before she had been there two weeks -- and, for all the world, if +the deestrict didn't want us to board her. Josiah hadn't much to +do, so he could carry her back and forth in stormy weather, and it +wuz her wish to come. And it wuz Josiah's wish too, for the pay +wuz good, and the work light -- for him. And so I consented after +a parlay. + +But I didn't regret it. She is a good little creeter and no more +like her mother than a feather bed is like a darnin' needle. I +like Ardelia: so does Josiah. + + + +III. + +THE CHERITY OF THE JONESVILLIANS. + + +We have been havin' a pound party here in Jonesville. There wuz a +lot of children left without any father or mother, nobody only an +old grandma to take care of 'em, and she wuz half bent with the +rheumatiz, and had a swelled neck, and lumbago and fits. + +They lived in an old tumble-down house jest outside of Jonesville. +The father wuz, I couldn't deny, a shiftless sort of a chap, +good-natured, always ready to obleege a neighbor, but he hadn'nt +no faculty. And I don't know, come to think of it, as anybody is +any more to blame if they are born without a faculty, than if they +are born with only one eye. Faculty is one of the things that you +can't buy. + +He loved to hunt. That is, he loved to hunt some kinds of things. +He never loved to hunt stiddy, hard work, and foller on the trail +of it till he evertook success and captured it. No, he druther +hunt after catamounts and painters, in woods where catamounts +haint mounted, and painters haint painted sence he wuz born. + +He generally killed nothin' bigger than red squirrels and chipmunks. +The biggest game he ever brought down wuz himself. He shot himself +one cold day in the fall of the year. He wuz gettin' over a brush +fence, they s'posed the gun hit against somethin' and went off, for +they found him a layin' dead at the bottom of the fence. + +I always s'posed that the shock of his death comin' so awful +sudden unto her, killed his wife. She had been sick for a long +spell, she had consumption and dropsy, and so forth, and so forth, +for a long time, and after he wuz brought in dead, she didn't live +a week. She thought her eyes of him, for no earthly reason as I +could ever see. How strange, how strange a dispensation of +Providence it duz seem, that some women love some men, and vicy +versey and the same. + +But she did jest about worship him, and she died whisperin' his +name, and reachin' out her hands as if she see him jest ahead of +her. And I told Josiah I didn't know but she did. I shouldn't +wonder a mite if she did see him, for there is only the veil of +mystery between us and the other world at any time, and she had +got so nigh to it, that I s'pose it got so thin that she could +see through it. + +Just as you can see through the blue haze that lays before our +forest in Injun summer. Come nigh up to it and you can see the +silvery trunks of the maples and the red sumac leaves, and the +bright evergreens, and the forms of the happy hunters a passin' +along under the glint of the sunbeams and the soft shadows. + +They died in Injun summer. I made a wreath myself of the +bright-colored leaves to lay on their coffins. Dead leaves, dead +to all use and purpose here, and yet with the bright mysterious +glow upon them that put me in mind of some immortal destiny and +blossoming beyond our poor dim vision. Jane Smedley wuz a good +woman, and so wuz Jim, good but shiftless. + +But I made the same wreath for her and Jim, and the strange mellow +light lay on both of 'em, makin' me think in spite of myself of +some happy sunrisin' that haply may dawn on some future huntin' +ground, where poor Jim Smedley even, may strike the trail of +success and happiness, hid now from the sight of Samantha, hid +from Josiah. + +Wall, they died within a week's time of each other, and left nine +children, the oldest one of 'em not quite fifteen. She, the +oldest one, wuz a good girl, only she had the rickets so that when +she walked, she seemed to walk off all over the house backwards, +and sideways, and every way, but when she sot down, she wuz a good +stiddy girl, and faithful; she took after her mother, and her +mother took after her grandmother, so there wuz three takin' after +each other, one right after the other. + +Jane wuz a good, faithful, hard-workin' creeter when she wuz well, +brought up her children good as she could, learnt 'em the +catechism, and took in all kinds of work to earn a little +somethin' towards gettin' a home for 'em; she and her mother both +did, her mother lived with 'em, and wuz a smart old woman, too, +for one that wuz pretty nigh ninety. And she wuzn't worrysome +much, only about one thing -- she wanted a home, wanted a home +dretfully. Some wimmen are so; she had moved round so much, from +one poor old place to another, that she sort o' hankered after +bein' settled down into a stiddy home. + +Wall, there wuz eight children younger than Marvilla, that wuz the +oldest young girl's name. Eight of 'em, countin' each pair of +twins as two, as I s'pose they ort. The Town buried the father +and mother, which wuz likely and clever in it, but after that it +wouldn't give only jest so much a week, which wuz very little, +because it said, Town did, that they could go to the poor-house, +they could be supported easier there. + +I don't know as the Town could really be blamed for sayin' it, and +yet it seemed kinder mean in it, the Town wuz so big, and the +children, most of 'em, wuz so little. + +But any way, it wuz jest sot on it, and there wuz the end of it, +for you might jest as well dispute the wind as to dispute the Town +when it gets sot. + +Wall, the old grandma said she would die in the streets before she +would go to the poor-house. She had come from a good family in +the first place, + +They say she run away and left a good home and got married, and +did dretful poor in the married state. He waz shiftless and didn't +have nothin' and didn't lay up any. And she didn't keep any of +her old possessions only jest her pride. She kept that, or enough +of it to say that she would die on the road before she would go to +the poor-house. And once I see her cry she wanted a home so bad. + +And lots of folks blamed her for it, blamed the old woman awfully. +They said pride wuz so wicked. Wimmen who would run like deers if +company came when they wuzn't dressed up slick, they would say the +minute they got back into the room, all out of breath with hurryin' +into their best clothes, they'd say a pantin' "That old woman ought +to be made to go to the poorhouse, to take the pride out of her, +pride wuz so awfully, dretfully wicked, and it wuz a shame that she +wuz so ongrateful as to want a home of her own." And then they +would set down and rest. + +Wall, the family wuz in a sufferin' state. The Town allowed 'em +one dollar a week. But how wuz ten human beings to live on a +dollar a week. The children worked every chance they got, but +they couldn't earn enough to keep 'em in shoes, let alone other +clothin' and vittles. And the old house wuz too cold for 'em to +stay in durin' the cold weather, it wuz for Grandma Smedley, +anyway, if the children could stand it she couldn't. And what wuz +to be done. A cold winter wuz a cumin' on, and it wouldn't delay +a minute because Jim Smedley had got shot, and his wife had +follered him, into, let us hope, a happier huntin' ground than he +had ever found in earthly forests. + +Wall, I proposed to have a pound party for 'em. I said they might +have it to our house if they wanted it, but if they thought they +wanted it in a more central place (our house wuz quite a little to +one side), why we could have it to the schoolhouse. + +I proposed to Josiah the first one. He wuz a settin' by the fire +relapsed into silence. It wuz a cold night outside, but the red +curtains wuz down at our sitting-room winders, shettin' out the +cold drizzlin' storm of hail and snow that wuz a deseendin' onto +the earth. The fire burned up warm and bright, and we sot there +in our comfortable home, with the teakettle singin' on the stove, +and the tea-table set out cosy and cheerful, for Josiah had been +away and I had waited supper for him. + +As I sot there waitin' for the tea-kettle to bile (and when I say +bile, I mean bile, I don't, mean simmer) the thought of the +Smedleys would come in. The warm red curtains would keep the +storm out, but they couldn't keep the thought of the children, and +the feeble old grandmother out of the room. They come right in, +through the curtains, and the firelight, and everything, and sot +right down by me and hanted me. + +And what curious creeters thoughts be, haint they? and oncertain, +too. You may make all your plans to get away from 'em. You may +shet up your doors and winders, and set with a veil on and an +umbrell up - but good land! how easy they jest ontackle the doors +and windows, with no sounds of ontacklin' and come right in by +you. + +First you know there they be right by the side of you, under your +umbrell, under your veil, under your spectacles, a lookin' right +down into your soul, and a hantin' you. + +And then agin, when you expect to be hanted by 'em, lay out to, +why, they'll jest stand off somewhere else, and don't come nigh +you. Don't want to. Oncertain creeters, thoughts be, and +curious, curious where they come from, and how. + +Why, I got to thinkin' about it the other day, and I got lost, +some like children settin' on a log over a creek a ridin'; there +they be, and there the log is, but they don't seem to be there, +they seem to be a floatin' down the water. + +And there I wuz, a settin' in my rockin' chair, and I seemed to be +a floatin' down deep water, very deep. A thinkin' and a wonderin'. +A thinkin' how all through the ages what secrets God had told to +man when the time had come, and the reverent soul below was ready +to hear the low words whispered to his soul, and a wonderin' what +strange revelation God held now, ready to reveal when the soul +below had fitted itself to hear, and comprehend it. + +Ah! such mysteries as He will reveal to us if we will listen. If +we wait for God's voice. If we did not heed so much the confusing +clamor of the world's voices about us. Emulation, envy, anger, +strife, jealousy; if we turned our heads away from these discords, +and in the silence which is God's temple, listened, listened, -- +who knows the secrets He would make known to us? + +Secrets of the day, secrets of the night, the sunshine, the +lightning, the storm. The white glow of that wonderful light that +is not like the glow of the sun or of the moon, but yet lighteth +the world. That strange light that has a soul - that reads our +thoughts, translates our wishes, overleaps distance, carrying our +whispered words after holding our thoughts for ages, and then +unfoldin' 'em at will. What other wondrous mysteries lie +concealed, wrapped around by that soft pure flame, mysteries that +shall lie hidden until some inspired eye shall be waiting, looking +upward at the moment when God's hand shall draw back the shining +veil for an instant, and let him read the glowing secret. + +Secrets of language! shall some simple power, some symbol be +revealed, and the nations speak together? + +Secrets of song! shall some serene, harmonious soul catch the note +to celestial melodies? + +Secrets of sight! shall the eyes too dim now, see the faces of the +silent throngs that surround them, "the great cloud of witnesses"? + +Secrets of the green pathways that lead up through the blue silent +fields of space - shall we float from star to star? + +Secrets of holiness! shall earthly faces wear the pure light of +the immortals? + +But oh! who shall be the happy soul that shall be listening when +the time has fully come and He shall reveal His great secret? The +happy soul listening so intently that it shall catch the low, +clear whisper. + +Listening, maybe, through the sweet twilight shadows for the +wonderful secret, while the silver shallop of the moon is becalmed +over the high northern mountains, as if a fleet of heavenly guests +had floated down through the clear ocean waves of the sky to +listen too - to hear the wonderful heavenly secret revealed to man +- and a clear star looks out over the glowing rose of the western +heavens, looking down like God's eye, searching his soul, +searching if it be worthy of the great trust. + +Maybe it will be in the fresh dawning of the day, that the great +secret will grow bright and clear and luminous, as the dawning of +the light. + +Maybe it will be in the midst of the storm - a mighty voice borne +along by the breath of the wind and the thunder, clamoring and +demanding the hearer to listen. + +Oh! if we were only good enough, only pure enough, what might not +our rapt vision discern? + +But we know not where or when the time shall be fully come, but +who, who, shall be the happy soul that shall, at the time, be +listening? + +Oh! how deep, how strange the waters wuz, and how I floated away +on 'em, and how I didn't. For there I wuz a settin in my own +rockin' chair and there opposite me sot my own Josiah a whittlin', +for the "World" hadn't come, and he wuz restless and ill at ease, +and time hung heavy on his hands. + +There I sot the same Samantha - and the thought of the Smedleys, +the same old Smedleys, was a hantin' of me, the same old hant, and +I says to my Josiah, says I: "Josiah, I can't help thinkin' about +the Smedleys," says I. "What do you think about havin' a pound +party for 'em, and will you take holt, and do your part?" + +"Good land, Samantha! Are you crazy? Crazy as a loon? What +under the sun do you want to pound the Smedleys for? I should +think they had trouble enough without poundin' 'em. Why," says +he, "the old woman couldn't stand any poundin' at all, without +killin' her right out and out, and the childern haint over tough +any of 'em. Why, what has got into you? I never knew you to +propose anything of that wicked kind before. I sha'n't have +anything to do with it. If you want 'em pounded you must get +your own club and do your own poundin'." + +Says I, "I don't mean poundin' 'em with a club, but let folks buy +a pound of different things to eat and drink and carry it to 'em, +and we can try and raise a little money to get a warmer horse for +'em to stay in the coldest of the weather." + +"Oh!" says he, with a relieved look. "That's a different thing. +I am willin' to do that. I don't know about givin' 'em any money +towards gettin' 'em a home, but I'll carry 'em a pound of crackers +or a pound of flour, and help it along all I can." + +Josiah is a clever creeter (though close), and he never made no +more objections towards havin' it. + +Wall, the next day I put on my shawl and hood (a new brown hood +knit out of zephyr worsted, very nice, a present from our daughter +Maggie, our son Thomas Jefferson's wife), and sallied out to see +what the neighbor's thought about it. + +The first woman I called on wuz Miss Beazley, a new neighbor who +had just moved into the neighborhood. They are rich as they can +be, and I expected at least to get a pound of tea out of her. + +She said it wuz a worthy object, and she would love to help it +along, but they had so many expenses of their own to grapple with, +that she didn't see her way clear to promise to do anything. She +said the girls had got to have some new velvet suits, and some +sealskin sacques this winter, and they had got to new furnish the +parlors, and send their oldest boy to college, and the girls +wanted to have some diamond lockets, and ought to have 'em but she +didn't know whether they could manage to get them or not, if they +did, they had got to scrimp along every way they could. And then +they wuz goin' to have company from a distance, and had got to get +another girl to wait on 'em. And though she wished the poor well, +she felt that she could not dare to promise a cent to 'em. She +wished the Smedley family well -- dretful well -- and hoped I +would get lots of things for 'em. But she didn't really feel as +if it would be safe for her to promise'em a pound of anything, +though mebby she might, by a great effort, raise a pound of flour +for 'em, or meal. + +Says I dryly (dry as meal ever wuz in its dryest times), "I +wouldn't give too much. Though," says I, "A pound of flour would +go a good ways if it is used right." And I thought to myself that +she had better keep it to make a paste to smooth over things. + +Wall, I went from that to Miss Jacob Hess'es, and Miss Jacob Hess +wouldn't give anything because the old lady wuz disagreeable, old +Grandma Smedley, and I said to Miss Jacob Hess that if the Lord +didn't send His rain and dew onto anybody only the perfectly +agreeable, I guessed there would be pretty dry times. It wuz my +opinion there would be considerable of a drouth. + +There wuz a woman there a visitin' Miss Hess -- she wuz a stranger +to me and I didn't ask her for anything, but she spoke up of her +own accord and said she would give, and give liberal, only she wuz +hampered. She didn't say why, or who, or when, but she only sez +this that "she wuz hampered," and I don't know to this day what +her hamper wuz, or who hampered her. + +And then I went to Ebin Garven'ses, and Miss Ebin Garven wouldn't +help any because she said "Joe Smedley had been right down lazy, +and she couldn't call him anything else." + +"But," says I, "Joe is dead, and why should his children starve +because their pa wasn't over and above smart when he wuz alive?" +But she wouldn't give. + +Wall, Miss Whymper said she didn't approve of the manner of +giving. Her face wuz all drawed down into a curious sort of a +long expression that she called religus and I called somethin' +that begins with "h-y-p-o" -- and I don't mean hypoey, either. + +No, she couldn't give, she said, because she always made a +practise of not lettin' her right hand know what her left hand +give. + +And I said, for I wuz kinder took aback, and didn't think, I said +to her, a glancin' at her hands which wuz crossed in front of her, +that I didn't see how she managed it, unless she give when her +right hand was asleep. + +And she said she always gave secret. + +And I said, "So I have always s'posed -- very secret." + +I s'pose my tone was some sarcastic, for she says, "Don't the +Scripter command us to do so?" + +Says I firmly, "I don't believe the Scripter means to have us +stand round talkin' Bible, and let the Smedleys starve," says I. +"I s'pose it means not to boast of our good deeds." + +Says she, "I believe in takin' the Scripter literal, and if I +can't git my stuff there entirely unbeknown to my right hand I +sha'n't give." + +"Wall," says I, gettin' up and movin' towards the door, "you must +do as you're a mind to with fear and tremblin'." + +I said it pretty impressive, for I thought I would let her see I +could quote Scripter as well as she could, if I sot out. + +But good land! I knew it wuz a excuse. I knew she wouldn't give +nothin' not if her right hand had the num palsy, and you could +stick a pin into it -- no, she wouldn't give, not if her right +hand was cut off and throwed away. + +Wall, Miss Bombus, old Dr. Bombus'es widow, wouldn't give -- and +for all the world -- I went right there from Miss Whymper'ses. +Miss Bombus wouldn't give because I didn't put the names in the +Jonesville Augur or Gimlet, for she said, "Let your good deeds so +shine." + +"Why," says I, "Miss Whymper wouldn't give because she wanted to +give secreter, and you won't give because you want to give +publicker, and you both quote Scripter, but it don't seem to help +the Smedleys much." + +She said that probably Miss Whymper was wrestin' the Scripter to +her own destruction." + +"Wall," says I, "while you and Miss Whymper are a wrestin' the +Scripter, what will become of the Smedleys? It don't seem right +to let them 'freeze to death, and starve to death, while we are a +debatin' on the ways of Providence." + +But she didn't tell, and she wouldn't give. + +A woman wuz there a visitin', Miss Bombus'es aunt, I think, and +she spoke up and said that she fully approved of her niece +Bombus'es decision. And she said, "As for herself, she never +give to any subject that she hadn't thoroughly canvassed." + +Says I, "There they all are in that little hut, you can canvass +them at any time. Though," says I, thoughtfully, "Marvilla might +give you some trouble." And she asked why. + +And I told her she had the rickets so she couldn't stand still to +be canvassed, but she could probably follow her up and canvass +her, if she tried hard enough. And says I, "There is old Grandma +Smedley, over eighty, and five children under eight, you can +canvass them easy." + +Says she, "The Bible says, `Search the Sperits.'" + +And I was so wore out a seein' how place after place, for three +times a runnin the Bible was lifted up and held as a shield before +stingy creeters, to ward off the criticism of the world and their +own souls, that I says to myself -- loud enough so they could hear +me, mebbe, "Why is it that when anybody wants to do a mean, +ungenerous act, they will try to quote a verse of Scripter to +uphold 'em, jest as a wolf will pull a lock of pure white wool +over his wolfish foretop, and try to look innocent and sheepish." + +I don't care if they did hear me, I wuz on the step mostly when I +thought it, pretty loud. + +Wall, from Miss Bombus'es I went to Miss Petingill's. + +Miss Petingill is a awful high-headed creeter. She come to the +door herself and she said, I must excuse her for answerin' the +door herself. (I never heard the door say anything and don't +believe she did, it was jest one of her ways.) But she said I +must excuse her as her girl wuz busy at the time. + +She never mistrusted that I knew her hired girl had left, and she +wuz doin' her work herself. She had ketched off her apron I knew, +as she come through the hall, for I see it a layin' behind the +door, all covered with flour. And after she had took me into the +parlor, and we had set down, she discovered some spots of flour on +her dress, and she said she "had been pastin' some flowers into a +scrap book to pass away the time." But I knew she had been bakin' +for she looked tired, tired to death almost, and it wuz her bakin' +day. But she would sooner have had her head took right off than +to own up that she had been doin' housework -- why, they say that +once when she wuz doin' her work herself, and was ketched lookin' +awful, by a strange minister, that she passed herself off' for a +hired girl and said, "Miss Petingill wasn't to home, and when +pressed hard she said she hadn't "the least idee where Miss +Petingill wuz." + +Jest think on 't once -- and there she wuz herself. The idee! + +Wall, the minute I sot down before I begun my business or +anything, Miss Petingill took me to do about puttin' in Miss +Bibbins President of our Missionary Society for the Relief of +Indignent Heathens. + +The Bibbins'es are good, very good, but poor. + +Says Miss Petingill: "It seems to me as if there might be some +other woman put in, that would have had more influence on the +Church." + +Says I, "Haint Miss Bibbins a good Christian sister, and a great +worker?" + +"Why yes, she wuz good, good in her place. But," she said, "the +Petingills hadn't never associated with the Bibbins'es." + +And I asked her if she s'posed that would make any difference with +the heathen; if the heathen would be apt to think less of Miss +Bibbins because she hadn't associated with the Petingills? + +And she said, she didn't s'pose "the heathens would ever know it; +it might make some difference to 'em if they did," she thought, +"for it couldn't be denied," she said, "that Miss Bibbins did not +move in the first circles of Jonesville." + +It had been my doin's a puttin' Miss Bibbins in and I took it +right to home, she meant to have me, and I asked her if she +thought the Lord would condemn Miss Bibbins on the last day, +because she hadn't moved in the first circles of Jonesville? + +And Miss Petingill tosted her head a little, but had to own up, +that she thought "He wouldn't." + +"Wall, then," sez I, "do you s'pose the Lord has any objections +to her working for Him now?" + +"Why no, I don't know as the Lord would object." + +"Wall," sez I, "we call this work the Lord's work, and if He is +satisfied with Miss Bibbins, we ort to be." + +But she kinder nestled round, and I see she wuzn't satisfied, but +I couldn't stop to argue, and I tackled her then and there about +the Smedleys. I asked her to give a pound, or pounds, as she felt +disposed. + +But she answered me firmly that she could't give one cent to the +Smedleys, she wuz principled against it. + +And I asked her, "Why?" + +And she said, because the old lady wuz proud and wanted a home, +and she thought that pride wuz so wicked, that it ort to be put +down. + +Wall, Miss Huff, Miss Cephas Huff, wouldn't give anything because +one of the little Smedleys had lied to her. She wouldn't +encourage lyin'. + +And I told her I didn't believe she would be half so apt to reform +him on an empty stomach, as after he wuz fed up. But she wouldn't +yield. + +Wall, Miss Daggett said she would give, and give abundant, only +she didn't consider it a worthy object. + +But it wuzn't nothin' only a excuse, for the object has never been +found yet that she thought wuz a worthy one. Why, she wouldn't +give a cent towards painting the Methodist steeple, and if that +haint a high and worthy object, I don't know what is. Why, our +steeple is over seventy feet from the ground. But she wouldn't +help us a mite -- not a single cent. + +Take such folks as them and the object never suits 'em. They +won't come right out and tell the truth that they are too stingy +and mean to give away a cent, but they will always put the excuse +onto the object -- the object don't suit 'em. + +Why, I do believe it is the livin' truth that if the angel Gabriel +wuz the object, if he wuz in need and we wuz gittin' up a pound +party for him -- she would find fault with Gabriel, and wouldn't +give him a ounce of provisions. + +Yes, I believe it -- I believe they would tost their heads and +say, they always had had their thoughts about anybody that tooted +so loud -- it might be all right but it didn't look well, and +would be apt to make talk. Or they would say that he wuz +shiftless and extravagant a loafin' round in the clouds, when he +might go to work -- or that he might raise the money himself by +selling the feathers offen his wings for down pillers -- or some +of the rest of the Gabriel family might help him -- or something, +or other -- anyway they would propose some way of gittin' out of +givin' a cent to Gabriel. I believe it as much as I believe I +live and breathe; and so does Josiah. + +Wall, Miss Mooney wouldn't give anything because she thought Jane +Smedley wuzn't so sick as she thought she wuz; she said "she was +spleeny." + +And I told Miss Mooney that when a woman was sick enough to die, I +thought she ort to be called sick. + +But Miss Mooney wouldn't give up, and insisted to the very last +that Miss Smedley wuz hypoey and spleeny -- and thought she wuz +sicker than she really wuz. And she held her head and her nose up +in a very disagreeable and haughty way, and said as I left, that +she never could bear to help spleeny people. + +Wall, all that forenoon did I traipse through the street and not +one cent did I get for the Smedleys, only Miss Gowdey said she +would bring a cabbage and Miss Deacon Peedick and Miss Ingledue +partly promised a squash apiece. And I mistrusted that they give +'em more to please me than anything else. + +Wall, I wuz clean discouraged and beat out, and so I told Josiah. +But he encouraged me some by sayin': + +"Wall, I could have told you jest how it would be," and, "You +would have done better, Samantha, to have been to home a cookin' +for your own famishin' family." And several more jest such +inspirin' remarks as men will give to the females of their +families when they are engaged in charitable enterprises. + +But I got a good, a very good dinner, and it made me feel some +better, and then I haint one to give up to discouragements, +anyway. + +So I put on a little better dress for after noon, and my best +bonnet and shawl, and set sail again after dinner. + +And if I ever had a lesson in not givin' up to discouragements in +the first place I had it then. For whether it wuz on account of +the more dressy look of my bonnet and shawl -- or whether it wuz +that folks felt cleverer in the afternoon -- or whether it wuz +that I had gone to the more discouragin' places in the forenoon, +and the better ones in the afternoon -- or whether it wuz that I +tackled on the subject in a better way than I had tackled 'em -- +whether it wuz for any of these reasons, or all of 'em or somethin' + -- anyway my luck turned at noon, 12 M., and all that afternoon +I had one triumph after another -- place after place did I collect +pound or pounds as the case may be (or collected the promises of +'em, I mean). I did splendid, and wuz prospered perfectly amazing + -- and I went home feelin' as happy and proud as a king or a zar. + +And the next Tuesday evenin' we had the pound party. They +concluded to have it to our house. And Thomas Jefferson and +Maggie, and Tirzah Ann and Whitefield came home early in the +afternoon to help trim the parlor and setin' room with evergreens +and everlastin' posies, and fern leaves. + +They made the room look perfectly beautiful. And they each of +'em, the two childern and their companions, brought home a motto +framed in nice plush and gilt frames, which they put up on each +side of the settin' room, and left them there as a present to +their pa and me. They think a sight of us, the childern do -- +and visey versey, and the same. + +One of 'em wuz worked in gold letters on a red back-ground "Bear +Ye One Another's Burdens." And the other wuz "Feed my Lambs." + +They think a sight on us, the childern do -- they knew them +mottoes would highly tickle their pa and me. And they did seem to +kinder invigorate up all the folks that come to the party. + +And they wuz seemingly legions. Why, they come, and they kept a +comin'. And it did seem as if every one of 'em had tried to see +who could bring the most. Why, they brought enough to keep the +Smedleys comfortable all winter long. It wuz a sight to see 'em. + +It wuz a curious sight, too, to set and watch what some of the +folks said and done as they brought their pounds in. + +I had to be to the table all the time a'most, for I wuz appointed +a committee, or a board -- I s'pose it would be more proper to +call myself a board, more business like. Wall, I wuz the board +appointed to lay the things on -- to see that they wuz all took +care of, and put where they couldn't get eat up, or any other +casuality happen to 'em. + +And I declare if some of the queerest lookin' creeters didn't come +up to the table and talk to me. There wuz lots of 'em there that +I didn't know, folks that come from Zoar, Jim Smedley's old +neighborhood. + +There wuz a long table stretched acrost one end of the settin' +room, and I stood behind it some as if I wuz a dry goods merchant +or grocery, and some like a preacher. + +And the women would come up to me and talk. There wuz one woman +who got real talkative to me before the evenin' wuz out. She said +her home wuz over two miles beyond Zoar. + +She had a young babe with her, a dark complexioned babe, with a +little round black head, that looked some like a cannon ball. She +said she had shingled the child that day about eight o'clock in +the forenoon; she talked real confidential to me. + +She said the babe had sights of hair, and she told her husband +that day that if he would shingle the babe she would come to the +party and if he wouldn't shingle it she wouldn't come. It seemed +they had had a altercation on the subject; she wanted it shingled +and he didn't. But it seemed that ruther than stay away from the +party -- he consented, and shingled it. So they come. + +They brought a eight pound loaf of maple sugar and two dozen eggs. +They did well. Then there wuz another woman who would walk her +little girl into the bedroom every few minutes, and wet her hair, +and comb it over, and curl it on her fingers. The child had a +little blue flannel dress on, with a long plain waist, and a long +skirt gethered on full all round. Her hair lay jest as smooth and +slick as glass all the time, but five times did she walk her off, +and go through with that performance. She brought ten yards of +factory cloth, and a good woollen petticoat for the old grandma. +She did first-rate. + +And then there wuz another woman who stayed by the table most all +the evenin'. She would gently but firmly ask everybody who +brought anything, what the price of the article wuz -- and then +she would tackle the different women who come up to the table for +patterns. I do believe she got the pattern of every bask waist +there wuz there, and every mantilly. + +And Abram Gee brought twenty-five loaves of bread -- of different +sizes, but all on 'em good. And he looked at Ardelia Tutt every +minute of the time. And Ardelia brought a lot of verses, -- +"Stanzas on a Grandmother." I didn't think they would do Grandma +Smedley much good, and then on the other hand I didn't s'pose they +would hurt her any. + +But we had a splendid good time after the things wuz all brought +in -- of course, bein' a board the fore part of the evenin' I +naturally had a harder time than I did the latter part, after I +had got over it. + +The children, Thomas J., and Tirzah Ann, and Ardelia Tutt, and +Abram Gee, and some of the rest of the young folks sung and played +some beautiful pieces, and they had four tablows, which wuz +perfectly beautiful. + +And then we passed good nice light biscuit and butter, and hot +coffee, and pop corn and apples. And it did seem, and all the +neighbors said so, that it wuz the very best party they had ever +attended to. + +And before they went away they made a motion some of the +responsable men did -- some made the motions and some seconded 'em +-- that they would adjourn till jest one year from that night, +when if the Smedleys was still alive and in need -- we would have +jest such a party ag'in. + +And at the last on't Elder Minkley made a prayer -- a very +thankful and good prayer, but short. And then they went home. + +Wall, the next mornin' we started to carry the things to the +Smedleys. It wuz very early, for Josiah had got to go clear to +Loontown on business, and I wuz goin' to stay with the childern +till he got back. + +It wuz a very cold mornin'. We hadn't heard from the Smedleys for +two or three days, because we wanted to surprise 'em, so we didn't +want to give 'em a hint beforehand of what we wuz a doin'. So, as +I say, it wuz a number of days sense we had heard from 'em, and +the weather wuz cold. + +When we got to the door it seemed to be dretful still there +inside. And there wuz some white frost on the latch jest as if a +icy, white hand had onlatched the door, and had laid on it last. + +We rapped, but nobody answered. And then we opened the door and +went in, and there they all lay asleep. The children waked up. +But old Grandma didn't. + +There wuzn't any fire in the room, and you could see by the +freezing coldness of the air that there hadn't been any for a day +or two. + +Grandma Smedley had took the poor old coverin's all off from +herself, and put 'em round the youngest baby, little Jim. And he +lay there all huddled up tight to his Grandma, with his red cheek +close to her white one, for he loved her. + +Josiah cried and wept, and wept and cried onto his bandana -- but +I didn't. + +The tears run down my face some, to see the childern feel so bad +when Grandma couldn't speak to 'em. + +But I knew that the childern would be took care of now, I knew the +Jonesvillians would be all rousted up and sorry enough for 'em, +and would be willin' to do anything now, when it wuz some too +late. + +And I felt that I couldn't cry nor weep (and told Josiah so), the +tears jest dripped down my face in a stream, but I wouldn't weep +-- for as I said to myself: + +While the Jonesvillians had been a disputin' back and forth, and +wrestin' Scripter, and the meanin' of Providence in regard to +helpin' Grandma Smedley and gittin' her a comfortable place to +stay in, and somethin' to eat, the Lord himself had took the case +in hand and had gin her a home and the bread that satisfies." + + + +IV. + +ARDELIA AND ABRAM GEE. + + +Wall, I don't s'pose there had been a teacher in our deestrict +for years and years that gin' better satisfaction than Ardelia +Tutt. Good soft little creeter, the scholars any one of 'em felt +above hurtin' on her or plagin' her any way. She sort a made 'em +feel they had to take care on her, she wuz so sort a helpless +actin', and good natured, and yet her learnin' wuz good, +fust-rate. + +Yes, Ardelia was thought a sight on in Jonesville by scholars and +parents and some that wuzn't parents. One young chap in +perticiler, Abram Gee by name, who had just started a baker's +shop in Jonesville, he fell so deep in love with her from the +very start that I pitied him from about the bottom of my heart. +It wuz at our house that he fell. + +The young folks of our meetin'-house had a sort of a evenin' +meetin' there to see about raisin' some money for the help of the +steeple -- repairin' of it. Abram is a member, and so is +Ardelia, and I see the hull thing. I see him totter and I see +him fall. And prostrate he wuz, from that first night. Never +was there a feller that fell in love deeper, or lay more +helpless. And Ardelia liked him, that wuz plain to see; at fust +as I watched and see him totter, I thought she wuz a sort o' +wobblin' too, and when he fell deep, deep in love, I looked to +see her a follerin' on. But Ardelia, as soft as she wuz, had an +element of strength. She wuz ambitious. She liked Abram, but +she had read novels a good deal, and she had for years been +lookin' for a prince to come a ridin' up to their dooryard in +disguise with a crown on under his hat, and woo her to be his +bride. + +And so she braced herself against the sweet influence of love and +it wuz tuff -- I could see for myself that it wuz, when she had +laid out to set on a throne by the side of a prince, he a holdin' +his father's scepter in his hand -- to descend from that elevation +and wed a husband who wuz a moulder of bread, with a rollin' pin +in his hand. It wuz tuff for Ardelia; I could see right through +her mind (it wuzn't a great distance to see), and I could see jest +how a conflict wuz a goin' on between love and ambition. + +But Abram had my best wishes, for he wuz a boy I had always +liked. The Gees had lived neighbor to us for years. He wuz a +good creeter and his bread wuz delicious (milk emptin's). He wuz +a sort of a hard, sound lookin' chap, and she, bein' so oncommon +soft, the contrast kinder sot each other off and made 'em look +well together. + +He had a house and lot all paid for, with no incumbrances only a +mortgage of 150 dollars and a lame mother. But he laid out to +clear off the mortgage this year, and I wuz told that mother Gee +wuz a goin' to live with her daughter Susan, who had jest come +into a big property -- as much as 700 dollars worth of land, +besides cows, 2 heads of cow, and one head of a calf. + +I knew Mother Gee and she wuz goin' to stay with Abram till he +got married and then she wuz goin' to live with Susan. And I +s'pose it is so. She is a likely old woman with a milk leg. + +Wall, Abram paid Ardelia lots of attention, sech as walkin' home +with her from protracted meetin's nights, and lookin' at her +durin' the meetin's more protracted than the meetin's wuz fur. +And 3 times he sent her a plate of riz biscuit sweetened, +sweetened too sweet almost, he went too fur in this and I see it. + +Yes, he done his part as well as his condition would let him, +paralyzed by his feelin's -- but she acted kinder offish, and I +see that sonthin' wuz in the way. I mistrusted at first, it +might be Abram's incumbrance, but durin' a conversation I had +with her, I see I wuz in the wrong on't. And I could see plain, +though some couldn't, that she liked Abram as she did her eyes. +Somebody run him down a little one day before me and she sprouted +right up and took his part voyalent. I could see her feelin's +towards him though she wouldn't own up to 'em. But one day she +came out plain to me and lamented his condition in life. +Somebody had attact her that day before me about marryin' of him +-- and she owned up to me, that she had laid out to marry +somebody to elevate her. Some one with a grand pure mission in +life. + +And I spoke right up and sez, "Why bread is jest as pure and +innocent as anything can be, you won't find anything wicked about +good yeast bread, nor," sez I, cordially, "in milk risin', if it +is made proper." + +But she said she preferred a occupation that wuz risin', and +noble, and that made a man necessary and helpful to the masses. + +And I sez agin -- "Good land! the masses have got to eat. And I +guess you starve the masses a spell and they'll think that good +bread is as necessary and helpful to 'em as anything can be. And +as fer its bein' a risin' occupation, why," sez I, "it is stiddy +risen' -- risin' in the mornin,' and risin' at night, and all +night, both hop and milk emptin's. Why," sez I, "I never see a +occupation so risin' as his'n is, both milk and hop." But she +wouldn't seem to give in and encourage him much only by spells. + +And then Abram didn't take the right way with her. I see he wuz +a goin' just the wrong way to win a woman's love. For his love, +his great honest love for her made him abject, he groveled at her +feet, loved to grovel. + +I told him, for he confided in me from the first on't and +bewailed her coldness to me, I told him to sprout up and act as +if he had some will of his own and some independent life of his +own. Sez I, "Any woman that sees a man a layin' around under her +feet will be tempted to step on him," sez I. "I don't see how +she can help it, if she calcerlates to get round any, and walk." +Sez I, "Sprout up and be somebody. She is a good little creeter, +but no better than you are, Abram; be a man." + +And he would try to be. I could see him try. But one of her +soft little glances, specially if it wuz kind and tender to him, +es it wuz a good deal of the time, why it would just overthrow +him ag'in. He would collapse and become nothin' ag'in, before +her. Why I have hearn him sing that old him, a lookin' right at +Ardelia stiddy: + +"Oh to be nothin', nothin'!" + +And thinks I to myself, "if this keeps on, you are in a fairway +to git your wish." + +He wuz a good singer, a beartone, and she a secent. They loved +to sing together. They needed some air, but then they got along +without it; and it sounded quite well, though rather low and +deep. + +Wall, it run along for weeks and weeks, he with his hopes a +risin' up sometimes like his yeast and then bein' pounded down +ag'in like his bread, under the hard knuckles of a woman's +capricious cruelty. For I must say that she did, for sech a soft +littte creeter, have cold and cruel ways to Abram. (But I s'pose +it wuz when she got to thinkin' about the Prince, or some other +genteel lover.) + +But her real feelin's would break out once in a while, and lift +him up to the 3d heaven of happiness and then he'd have to totter +and fall down ag'in. Abram Gee had a hard time on't. I pitied +him from nearly the bottom of my heart. But I still kep' a +thinkin' it would turn out well in the end. For it wuz jest +about this time that I happened to find this poetry in a book +where she had, I s'posed, left it. And I read 'em, almost +entirely unbeknown to myself. + +It wuz wrote in a dreatful blind way but I recognized it at once. +I looked right through it, and see what she wuz a writin' about +though many wouldn't, it wuz wrote in sech a deep style. + + "STANZAS ON BREAD; + + "or + + "A LAY OF A BROKEN HEART. + + "Oh Bread, dear Bread, that seemest to us so cold, + Oft'times concealed thee within, may be a sting! + Sweet buried hopes may in thy crust be rolled; + A sad, burnt crust of deepest suffering. + + "There are some griefs the female soul don't tell, + And she may weep, and she may wretched be; + Though she may like the name of Abram well + And she may not like dislike the name of G , + + "Oh Fel Ambition, how thou lurest us on, + How by thy high, bold torch we're stridin' led: + Thou lurest us up, cold mountain top upon, + And seated by us there, thou scoffest at bread. + + "Thou lookest down, Ambition, on the ovens brim; + Thou brookest not a word of him save with contumalee: + And yet, wert thou afar, how sweet to set by him + And cut low slices of sweet joy with G , + + "Oh! Fel Ambition, wert but thou away, + Could we thy hauntin' form no more, nor see; + How sweet 'twould be to linger on with A-, + How sweet 'twould be to dwell for aye with G-." + +Wall, as I say, she gin good satisfaction in the deestrict and I +declare for it, I got to likin' her dretful well before the +winter wuz over. Softer she wuz, and had to be, than any fuz +that was ever on any cotton flannel fur or near. And more verses +she wrote than wuz good for her, or for anybody else, - Why she +would write "Lines on the Tongs," or "Stanzas on the Salt +Suller," if she couldn't do any better; it beats all! And then +she would read 'em to me to get my idees on 'em. Why I had to +call on every martyr in the hull string of martyrs sometimes to +keep myself from tellin' her my full mind about 'em unbeknown to +me. For, if I had, it would have skairt the soft little creeter +out of what little wit she had. + +So I kep' middlin' still, and see it go on. For she wuz a good +little soul, affectionate and kinder helpful. A good creeter now +to find your speks. Why she found 'em for me times out of +number, and I got real attached to her and visey versey. And +when she came a visitin' me in the spring (at my request), and I +happened to mention that Josiah and me laid out to go to Saratoga +for the summer, what did the soft little creeter want to do but +to go too. Her father was well off and wuz able to send her, and +she had relatives there on her own side, some of the Pixleys, so +her board wouldn't cost nothin'. So it didn't look nothin' +unreasonable, though whether I could get her there and back +without her mashin' all down on my hands, like a over ripe peach, +she wuz that soft, wuz a question that hanted me, and so I told +Josiah. + +But Josiah kinder likes young girls (nothin' light; a calm +meetin'-house affection), it is kinder nater that he should, and +he sez: "Better let her go, she won't make much trouble." + +"No," sez I, "not to you, but if you had to set for hours and +hours and hear her verses read to you on every subject -- on +heaven, and earth, and the seas, and see her a measurin' of it +with a stick to get the lines the right length; if you had to go +through all this, mebby you would meditate on the subject before +you took it for a summer's job." + +" Wall," sez he, "mebby she won't write so much when she gets +started; she will be kinder jogged round and stirred up in body +and mebby her feelins' will kinder rest. I shouldn't wonder a +mite if they did," sez he. "And then she can take a good many +steps for you, and I love to see you favored," sez he. + +He wanted her to go, I see that, and I see that it wuz natur that +he should, and so I consented in my mind -- after a parlay. + +She found his specks a sight and his hat. Nothin' seemed to +please her better than to be gropin' round after things to please +somebody; her disposition wuz such. So it wuz settled that she +should accompany and go with us. And the mornin' we started she +met us at the Jonesville Depot in good sperits and a barege +delaine dress, cream color, and a hat of the same. + +I hadn't seen her for some weeks, and she seemed softly tickled +to see Josiah and me, and asked a good many questions about +Jonesville, kinder turnin' the conversation gradually round onto +bread, as I could see. So I branched right out, knowin' what she +wanted of me, and told her plain, that "Abram Gee wuz a lookin' +kinder mauger. But doin' his duty stiddy," sez I, lookin' keenly +at her, "a doin' his duty by everybody, and beloved by everybody, +him and his bread too." + +She turned her head away and kinder sithed, and I guess it wuz as +much as a quarter of a hour after that, that I see her take out a +pencil and a piece of paper out of her portmonny, and a little +stick, and she went to makin' some verses, a measurin' 'em +careful as she wrote 'em, and when she handed 'em to me they wuz +named + + + + "A LAY ON A CAR; + + "or + + "THE LESSON OF A LOCOMOTIVE." + +After I had read it and handed it back to her, she sez, "Don't +you think I improve on the melody and rhythm of my poetry? I +take this little stick with me now wherever I go, and measure my +lines by it. They are jest of a length, I am very particular; +you know you advised me to be." + +"Yes," sez I mechaniklly, "but I didn't mean jest that." Sez I, +"the poetry I wuz a thinkin' on, is measured by the soul, the +enraptured throb of heart and brain; it don't need takin' a stick +to it. Howsumever," sez I, for I see she looked sort a +disapinted, "howsumever, if you have measured 'em, they are +probable about the same length: it is a good sound stick, I +haint no doubt;" and I kinder sithed. + +And she sez, "What do you think of the first verse? Haint that +verse as true as fate, or sadness, or anything else you know of?" + +"Oh yes," sez I candidly, "yes; if the cars run backwards we +shouldn't go on; that is true as anything can be. But if I wuz +in your place, Ardelia," sez I, "I wouldn't write any more +to-day. It is a kind of muggy damp day. It is a awfully bad day +for poetry to-day. And," sez I, to get her mind offen it, "Have +you seen anything of my companion's specks?" + +And that took her mind offen poetry and she went a huntin' for +'em, on the seat and under the seat. She hunted truly high and +low and at last she found 'em on my pardner's foretop, the last +place any of us thought of lookin'. And she never said another +word about poetry, or any other trouble, nor I nuther. + + + + +V. + +WE ARRIVE AT SARATOGA. + + +We arrived at Saratoga jest as sunset with a middlin' gorgeous +dress on wuz a walkin' down the west and a biddin' us and the +earth good-bye. There wuz every color you could think on almost, +in her gown and some stars a shinin' through the floatin' drapery +and a half moon restin' up on her cloudy foretop like a beautiful +orniment. + +(I s'pose mebby it is proper to describe sunset in this way on +goin' to such a dressy place, though it haint my style to do so, I +don't love to describe sunset as a female and don't, much of the +time, but I love to see things correspond.) + +Wall, we descended from the cars and went to the boardin' place +provided for us beforehand by the look out of friends. It wuz a +good place, there haint no doubt of that, good folks; good fare +and clean. + +Ardelia parted away from us at the depo. She wuz a goin' to board +to a smaller boardin' house kep' by a second cousin of her +father's brother's wife's aunt. It wuz her father's request that +she should get her board there on account of its bein' in the +family. He loved "to see relations hang together;" so he said, +and "get their boards of each other." But I thought then, and I +think now, that it wuz because they asked less for the board. +Deacon Tutt is close. But howsumever Ardelia went there, and my +companion and me arrove at the abode where we wuz to abide, with +no eppisode only the triflin' one of the driver bein' dretful +mistook as to the price he asked to take us there. + +I thought, and Josiah thought, that 50 cents wuz the outlay of +expendatur he required to carry us where we would be; it wuz but a +short distance. But no! He said that 5 dollars wuz what he said, +that is, if we heard anything about a 5. But he thought we wuz +deef, and dident hear him. He thought he spoke plain, and said 4 +dollars for the trip. + +And on that price he sot down immovible. They arged, and Josiah +Allen even went so far as to use language that grated on my nerve, +it wuz so voyalent and vergin' on the profane. But there the man +sot, right onto that price, and he had to me the appeerance of one +who wuz goin' to sot there on it all night. And so rather than to +spend the night out doors, in conversation with him, he a settin' +on that price, and Josiah a shakin' his fist at it, and a jawin' +at it, I told Josiah that he had better pay it. And finally he +did, with groanin's that could hardly be uttered. + +Wall, after supper (a good supper and enough on't), Josiah proposed +that we should take a short walk, we two alone, for Ardelia wuz +afar from us, most to the other end of the village, either asleep +or a writin' poetry, I didn't know which, but I knew it wuz one or +the other of 'em. And I wuz tired enough myself to lay my head +down and repose in the arms of sleep, and told my companion so, +but he said: + +"Oh shaw! Let old Morpheus wait for us till we get back, there'll +be time enough to rest then." + +Josiah felt so neat, that he wuz fairly beginnin' to talk high +learnt, and classical. But I didn't say nothin' to break it up, +and tied on my bonnet with calmness (and a double bow knot) and we +sallied out. + +Soon, or mebby a little after, for we didn't walk fast on account +of my deep tucker, we stood in front of what seemed to be one hull +side of a long street, all full of orniments and open work, and +pillows, and flowers, and carvin's, and scallops, and down between +every scollop hung a big basket full of posys, of every beautiful +color under the heavens. And over all, and way back as fur as we +could see, wuz innumerable lights of every color, gorgeousness a +shinin' down on gorgeousness, glory above, a shinin' down on glory +below. And sweet strains of music wuz a floatin, out from +somewhere, a shinin' somewhere, renderin' the seen fur more +beautiful to all 4 of our wraptured ears. + +And Josiah sez, as we stood there nearly rooted to the place by +our motions, and a picket fence, sez he dreamily, + +"I almost feel as if we had made a mistake, and that this is the +land of Beuler." And he murmured to himself some words of the old +him: + +"Oh Beuler land! Sweet Beuler land!" + +And I whispered back to him and sez - "Hush they don't have brass +bands in Beulah land." + +And he sez, "How do you know what they have in Beuler?" + +"Wall," sez I, "'taint likely they do." + +But I don't know as I felt like blamin' him, for it did seem to me +to be the most beautiful place that I ever sot my eyes on. And it +did seem fairly as if them long glitterin' chains and links of +colored lights, a stretchin' fur back into the distance sort a +begoned for us to enter into a land of perfect beauty and Pure +Delight. + +And then them glitterin' chains of light would jine onto other +golden, and crimson, and orange, and pink, and blue, and amber +links of glory and hang there all drippin' with radiance, and way +back as fur as we could see. And away down under the shinin' +lanes the white statues stood, beautiful snow-white females, a +lookin' as if they enjoyed it all. And the lake mirrowed back all +of the beauty. + +Right out onto the lake stood a fairy-like structure all glowin' +with big drops of light and every glitterin' drop reflected down +in the water and the fountain a sprayin' up on each side. Why it +sprayed up floods of diamonds, and rubys, and sapphires, and +topazzes, and turkeys, and pearls, and opals, and sparklin' 'em +right back into the water agin. + +And right while we stood there, neerly rooted to the spot and +gazin' through extacy and 2 pickets, the band gin a loud burst of +melody and then stopped, and after a minute of silence, we hearn a +voice angel-sweet a risin' up, up, like a lark, a tender-hearted, +golden-throated lark. + +High, high above all the throngs of human folks who wuz cheerin' +her down below - up above the sea of glitterin' light - up above +the bendin' trees that clasped their hands together in silent +applaudin' above her, up, up, into the clear heavens, rose that +glorious voice a singin' some song about love, love that wuz +deathless, eternal. + +Why it seemed as if the very clouds wuz full of shadowy faces a +bendin' down to hear it, and the new moon, shaped just like a +boat, had glided down, down the sky to listen. + +If the man of the moon was there he wuz a layin' in the bottom of +the boat, he wuzn't in sight. But if he heard that music I'll bet +he would say he wuzn't in the practice of hearin' any better. And +Josiah stood stun still till she had got done, and then he sort a +sithed out: + +"Oh, it seems as if it must be Beuler land! Do you s'pose, +Samantha, Beuler land is any more beautiful?" + +And I sez, "I haint a thinkin' about Beulah." I sez it pretty +middlin' tart, partly to hide my own feelin's, which wuz perfectly +rousted up, and partly from principle, and sez I, "Don't for +mercy's sake call it Beuler." + +Josiah always will call it so. I've got a 4th cousin, Beulah Smith +(my own age and unmarried up to date), and he always did and would +call her Beuler. Truly in some things a pardner's influence and +encouragement fails to accomplish the ends aimed at. + +Wall, it wuz after some words that I drew Josiah away from that +seen of enchantment - or he me, I don't exactly know which way it +wuz - and we wended onwards in our walk. + +The hull broad streets wuz full of folks, full as they could be, +all on 'em perfect strangers to us and who knew what motives or +weapons they wuz a carryin' with 'em; but we knew we wuz safe, +Josiah and me did, for way up over all our heads, stood a big +straight soldier, a volunteer volunteerin, to see to the hull crew +on 'em below, a seein' that they behaved themselves. His age wuz +seventy-seven as near as I could make out but he didn't look +more'n half that. He had kep' his age remarkable. + +Wall, it wuz, if I remember right, jest about now that we see a +glitterin' high up over our heads some writen in flame. I never +see such brilliant writin, before nor don't know as I ever shall +ag'in. + +And Josiah stopped stun still, and stood a lookin' perfectly +dumfoundered at it. And finally he sez, "I'd give a dollar bill +if I could write like that." + +I see he wuz deeply rousted up for 2 cents is as high as he +usually goes in betted. I see he felt deep and I didn't blame +him. Why," sez he, "jest imagine, Samantha, a hull letter wrote +like that! how I'd love to send one back to Uncle Nate Gowdey. + +"How Uncle Nate's eyes would open, and he wouldn't want no +spectacles nor nothin' to read it with, would he? I wonder if I +could do it," sez he, a beginnin' to be all rousted up. + +But I sez, "Be calm," for so deep is my mind that I grasped the +difficuties of the undertaken' at once. "How could yon send it, +Josiah Allen? Where would you get a envelop? How could you get +it into the mail bag?" Sez I, "When anybody would send a letter +wrote like that, they would want to write it on sheets of +lightnin', and fold it up in the envelopin' clouds of the skies, +and it should be received by a kneelin' and reverent soul. Who is +Uncle Nate that he should get it? He has not a reverent Soul and +he has also rheumatiz in his legs." + +And then I thought, so quick and active is my mind when it gets to +startin' off on a tower, I thought of what I had hearn a few days +before, of how the secret had been learnt by somebody who lived +right there in the village, of floatin' letters up at sea from one +ship to another, sigualin' out in letters of flame - + +"Help! I'm a sinkin'!" or "Danger ahead! Look out!" + +And I thought what it must be to stand on a dusky night on a lone +deck and see up on the broad, dark; lonesome sky above, a sudden +message, a flash of vivid lightnin', takin' to itself the form of +language. And I wondered to myself if in the future we should use +the great pages of the night-sky to write messages from one city +to another, or from sea to land, of danger and warnin'; and then I +thought to myself, if souls clog-bound to earth are able to +accomplish so much, who knows but the freed soul goin' outward and +onward from height to height of wisdom may yet be able to signal +down from the Safe Land messages of help and warnin' to the souls +it loved below. + +The souls a sailin' and a driftin' through the dark night of +despair - a dashin' along through fog and mist and darkness aginst +rocks. What it would be to one kneelin' in the lonesome night +watches by a grave, if the dark sky could grow luminous and he +could read, - "Do not despair! I am alive! I love you!" + +Or, in the hour of the blackest temptation and dread, when the +earth is hollow and the sky a black vault, and the only way of +happiness on God's earth seems down the dangerous, beautiful way, +God-forbidden, what would it be to have the empty vault lit up +with "Danger ahead! We will help you! be patient a little +longer!" + +Oh how fur my thoughts wuz a travellin', and at what a good jog, +but not one trace did my companion see on my forward of these +thoughts that wuz a passin' through my foretop: and at that very +minute, we came up nigh enough to see that right back of the +glitterin' language overhead, went a long line of big, glowin' +stars of glory way up over our heads, and leadin' down a gentle +declivity and Josiah sez, "Let's foller on, and see what it will +lead us to, Samantha." + +"Wall," sez I, "light is pretty generally, safe to foller, Josiah +Allen." And so we meandered along, keepin' our 2 heads as nigh as +we could under that long glitterin' chain of golden drops that wuz +high overhead. And on, and on, we follered it dilligently; till +for the land's sake! if it didn't lead us to another one of them +openwork buildin's, fixed off beautiful, and we could see inside 2 +big wells like, with acres of floor seemin'ly on each side of 'em, +and crowds of folks a walkin' about and settin' at little tables +and most all of 'em a drinkin'. + +The water they drinked we could see wuz a bubblin' up and a +runnin' over all the time, in big round crystal globes. And up, +up on a slender pole way up over one of the wells hung another one +of them crystal bowls, a bubblin' over with the water and +sparklin'. + +And ag'in Josiah asked me if I thought Beuler land could compare +with it? + +And I told him ag'in kinder sharp, That I wuzn't a thinkin' about +Beuler, I didn't know any sech a place or name. I wish he would +call things right. + +Wall, he wuz so dead tired by this time, that we sot sail homewards; +that is, my feet wuz tired, and my bones, but my mind seemed more +rousted up than common. + + + + +VI. + +SARATOGA BY DAYLIGHT. + + +Wall, the next mornin' Josiah and me sallied out middlin' early to +explore still further the beauties and grandness of Saratoga. I +had on a black straw bonnet, a green vail, and a umbrell. I also +have my black alpacky, that good moral dress. + +My dress bein' such a high mission one choked me. It wuz so high +in the neck it held my chin up in a most uncomfortable position, +but sort a grand and lofty lookin'. My sleeves wuz so long that +more'n half the time my hand wuz covered up by 'em and I wuz too +honerable to wear 'em for mits; no, in the name of principle I +wore 'em for sleeves, good long sleeves, a pattern to other +grandmas that I might meet. + +I felt that when they see me and see what I wuz a doin' and +endurin' fur the cause of female dressin' they would pause in +their wild career, and cover up their necks and pull their sleeves +down. + +Wall, it haint to be expected that I could walk along carryin' +such hefty emotions as I wuz a carryin', and havin' my neck held +high and stiddy both by principle and alpacky, and see to every +step I wuz a takin'. And, first I knew, right while I was +enjoyin' the loftiest of these emotions, I ketched my foot in +sunthin', and most fell down. Instinctively (such is the power of +love) I put out my hand and clutched at the arm of my pardner. +But he too wuz nearly fallin' at the same time. It wuz a narrow +chance that we wuz a runnin' from having our prostrate forms a +layin' there outstretched on the highway. + +Instinctively I sez, "Good land!" and Josiah sez -- wall, it is +fur from me to tell what he said, but it ended up with these +words, "Dumb them dumb sidewalks anyway;" and sez he, "I should +think it would pay to have a little less gilt paint and spangles +and orniments overhead and a few more solid bricks unless they +want more funerals here, dumb 'em!" + +Sez I,"Be calm! who be you a talkin' about? who do you want to +bring down your fearful curses on, Josiah Allen?" + +"Why, onto the dumb bricks," sez he. + +He wuz agitated and I said no more. But four times in that first +walk, did I descend almost precipitously into declivities amongst +the bricks, risin' simultaneously on similar elevations. + +It wuz a fearful ordeel and I felt it so, but upheld by principle +and Josiah, I moved onwards, through what seemed to be 5 great +throngs and masses of people, 3 on the ground and 2 hinted up +above us on tall pillows. + +Them immense places overhead long as the streets, wuz kinder +scalloped out and trimmed off handsum with railin's, etc. And on +it -- oh! what a vast congregation of heads of all sorts and sizes +and colors. And oh! what a immense display of parasols; why no +parasol store in the land could begin with what I see there. + +I can truly say that I thought I knew somethin' about parasols;, +havin' owned 3 different ones in the course of my life, and havin' +one covered over. I thought I knew somethin' of their nater and +habits, which is a good deal, so I had always s'posed, like a +umbrell's. But good land! I gin up that I knew them not, nor +never had. + +Why anybody could learn more on 'em through one jerney down that +street, than from a hull lifetime in Jonesville. Truly travel is +very upliftin' and openin' and spreadin' out to the mind, both in +parasols and human nater. + +Wall, them 2 masses over our heads wuz 2, then the one in which we +wuz a strugglin' and the one opposite to it made 4. For anybody +with any pretence to learnin' knows that twice 2 is 4. And then +in the middle of the broad street was a bigger mass of chariots +and horsemen, and carts and carriages, and great buggies and +little ones, and big loads of barrels, and big loads of ladies, +and then a load of wood, and then a load of hay, and then a pair +of young folks pretty as a picture. And then came some high big +coaches as big as our spare bedroom, and as high as the roof on +our horse barn, with six horses hitched to e'm, all runnin' over +on top with men; and wimmen, and children, and parasols, and +giggles, and ha ha's. And a man wuz up behind a soundin' out on a +trumpet, a dretful sort of a high, sweet note, not dwindlin' down +to the end as some music duz, but kinder crinklin' round and +endin' up in the air every time. + +Josiah wuz dretful took with it and he told me in confidence that +he laid out when he got home to buy a trumpet and blow out jest +them strains every time he went into Jonesville or out of it. He +said it would sound so sort a warlike and impressive. + +I expostulated aginst the idee. But sez he, "You'll enjoy it when +you get used to it." + +"Never!" sez I. + +"Yes you will," sez he, "and while I live I lay out that you shall +have advantages, and shall enjoy things new and uneek." + +"Yes," sez I feelin'ly, "I expect to, Josiah Allen, as long as I +live with you." And I sithed. But I had little time to enjoy +even sithin', for oh! the crowd that wuz a pressin' onto us and +surroundin' us on every side, some on 'em curius and strange +lookin', some on 'em beautiful and grand. Pretty young girls +lookin' sweet enough to kiss, and right behind 'em a Chinese man +with a long dress, and wooden shoes, and his hair in a long braid +behind, and his eyes sot in sideways. And then would come on a +hull lot of wimmen in dresses ev'ry color of the rainbow, and some +men. Then a few childern, lookin' sweet as roses, with their +mothers a pushin' the little carts ahead on 'em. And if you'll +believe it, I don't s'pose you will, but it is true, that lots of +black ma's had childern jest as white as snow, and pretty as +rosebuds, took after their fathers I s'pose. But I don't believe +in a mixin' of the races. And when I see 'em a kissin' the pretty +babys, I begun to muse a very little on the feelin's of the +indignent South, at havin' a colered girl set in the same car with +'em, or on a bench in the same school room. + +I mewsed on how they held the white forms clost to their black +breasts at birth, and in the hour of death -- the black lips +pressed to the white cheeks and lips, in both cases. And all the +way between life and death they mingle clost as they can, some in +some cases like the hill of knowledge. Then the contact is too +clost, when they sot out to climb up by 'em. Truly there are deep +conundrums and strange ones, all along through life; though the +white man may be, and is, cleer up out of his way, on the sunshiny +brow of the hill, and the black man at the foot, way down amongst +the shadows and darkness of the low grounds. They don't come very +nigh each other. But the arms that have felt the clasp and the +lips that have felt the kisses of that very same black climber all +through life, moves 'em and shouts 'em to "go down," to "go back," + +"The contact is getting too clost, danger is ahead." Curious, +haint it? Jest as if any danger is so dangerous as ignorance and +brutality. Curious, haint it? But I am a eppisodin', and to +resoom. + +Wall, right after the babies we'd meet a Catholic priest with a +calm and fur away look on his face, a lookin' at the crowd as if +he wuz in it, but not of it. And then a burgler, mebby, anyway a +mean lookin' creeter, ragged and humble. And then 2 or 3 men +foreign lookin', jabberin' in a tongue I know nothin' of, nor +Josiah either. And then some more childern, and wimmen, and dogs, +and parasols, and men, and babies, and Injuns, and Frenchmen, and +old young wimmen, and young old ones, and handsome ones, and +hombly ones, and parasols, and some sweet young girls ag'in, and +some black men, and some white men, and some more wimmen, and +parasols, and silk, and velvet, and lace, and puckers, and +raffles, and gethers, and gores, and flowers, and feathers, and +fringes, and frizzles, and then some men, some Southerners from +the South, some Westerners from the West, some Easterners from the +East, and some Cubebs from Cuba, and some Chinamen from China. + +Oh! what a seen! What a seen! back and forth, passin' and +repassin', to and fro, parasols, and dogs, and wimmen, and men, +and babies, and parasols, to and fro, to and fro. Why, if I stood +there long so crazed would I have become at the seen, that I +should have felt that Josiah wuz a To and I wuz a Fro, or I wuz a +parasol and he wuz a dog. + +And to prevent that fearful catastrophe, I sez, "If we ever get +beyond this side of the village that seems all run together, if we +ever do get beyond it, which seems doubtful, le's go and sit down, +in some quiet spot, and try to collect our scattered minds." Sez +I, "I feel curius, Josiah Allen!" and sez I, "How do you feel?" + +His answer I will not translate; it was neither Biblical nor even +moral. And I sez agin, "Hain't it strange that they have the +village all run together with no streets turnin' off of it." Sez +I, "It makes me feel queer, Josiah Allen, and I am a goin' to +enquire into it." So we wended our way some further on amongst +the dense crowd I have spoken of, only more crowded and more +denser, and anon, if not oftener, Josiah's head would be scooped +in by passin' parasols, and then in low, deep tones, Josiah would +use words that I wouldn't repeat for a dollar bill, till at last I +asked a by bystander a standin' by, and sez I, "Is this village +all built together -- don't you have no streets a turnin' off of +it?" + +"Yes," sez he, "you'll find a street jest as soon as you get by +this hotel." + +I stopped right in my tracts; I wuz dumbfoundered. Sez I, "Do you +mean to say that this hull side of the street that we have been a +traversin' anon, or long before anon, -- do you say that this is +all one buildin'?" + +"Yes mom," sez he. + +Sez I, in faint axents, "When shall we get to the end on it?" + +Sez he, "You have come jest about half way." + +Josiah gin a deep groan and turned him round in his tracts and +sez, "Le's go back this minute." + +I too thought of the quiet haven from whence we had set out, with +a deep longin', but sech is the force and strength of my mind that +I grasped holt of the situation and held it there tight. If we +wuz half way across it wouldn't be no further to go on than it +would to go back. Such wuz my intellect that I see it to once, +but Josiah's mind couldn't grasp it, and with words murmured in my +ears which I will never repeat to a livin' soul he wended on by my +side through the same old crowd -- parasols, and wimmen, and dogs, +and babies, and men, and parasols, and Injuns, and Spanards, and +Creoles, and pretty girls, and old wimmen, and puckers, and +gethers, and bracelets, and diamonds, and lace, and parasols. +Several times, if not more, wuz Josiah Allen scooped in by a +parasol held by a female, and I felt he wuz liable to be torn from +me. His weight is but small. 3 times his hat fell off in the +operation and wuz reskued with difficulty, and he spoke words I +blush to recall as havin' passed my pardner's lips. + +Wall, in the fullness of time, or a little after, for truly I wuz +not in a condition to sense things much, we arrove at a street and +we gladly turned our 2 frames into it, and wended our way on it, +goin' at a pretty good jog. The crowd a growin' less and less and +we kep a goin', and kep a goin', till Josiah sez in weary axents: + +"Where be you a goin', Samantha? Haint you never goin' to stop? +I am fairly tuckered out." + +And I sez in faint axents, "I would fain reach a land where +parasols and puckers are not and dogs and diamonds are no more." + +I wuz middlin' incoherent from my agitation. But I meant well. I +wuz truly in hopes I would reach some quiet place where Josiah and +me could set down alone. Where I could look in quiet and repose +upon that dear bald head, and recooperate my strength. + +We went by beautiful places, grand houses of different colors but +every one on 'em good lookin' ones, a settin' back amongst their +green trees, with shady grass-covered yards, and fountains and +flower beds in front of 'em, and more grand handsome houses, and +more big beautiful yards, green velvet grass and beautiful flowers +and fountains, and birds and beauty on every side on us. + +And though I felt and knew that in them big carriages that was a +passin' 2 and fro all the time, though I felt that parasols, and +puckers, and laces, and dogs, and diamonds, wuz a bein' borne past +me all the time, yet sech is the force of my mind that I could +withdraw my specks from 'em, and look at the beautiful works of +nater (assisted by man) that wuz about me on every hand. + +Finally my long search wuz rewarded, we came to a big open gateway +that seemed to lead into a large, quiet delightful forest. And in +that lovely, lonesome place, Josiah and me sot down to recooperate +our 2 energies. + +Josiah looked good to me. Men are nice creeters, but you don't +want to see too meny of 'em to once, likeways with wimmen. Josiah +looked to me at that moment some like a calico dress that you have +picked out of a dense quantity of patterns of calico at a store, +it looks better to you when you get it away from the rest. Josiah +Allen looked good to me. + +But anon, after I had bathed my distracted eyes (as you may say) +in the liniment of my pardner, I began to take in the rare beauty +of the seen laid out before me and we arose and wended our way +onwards peaceful and serene, as 2 childern led on by their mother. + +Dear Mother Nature! how dost thou rest and soothe thy distracted +childern when too hardly used by the grindin', oppressive hands of +fashion,and the weerisome elements of a too civilized life. Maybe +thou art a heathen mother, oneducated and ignorant in all but the +wisdom of love, but thy bosom is soft and restful, and thy arms +lovin' and tender. And, heathen if thou art, we love thee first +and at last. We are glad to slip out of all the vain and gilded +supports that have held us weerily up, and lay down our tired +heads on thy kindly and unquestionin' bosom and rest. + +As we rose from the soft turf, on which we had been a restin', and +meandered on through that beautiful park, (so tenderly had nature +used him,) not one trace of the wild commotion that had almost +rent Josiah Allen's breast, could be seen save one expirin' +threeoh of agony. As we started out ag'in, he looked down onto my +faithful umberell, that had stiddied me on so many towers of +principle, and sez he, in low concentrated axents of skern and +bitterness, "If that wuz a dumb parasol, Samantha, I would crush +it to the earth and grind it to atoms." + +Truly he could not forget how his bald head had been gethered in +like a ripe sheaf, by 7 females, during that very walk, hombly +ones too, so it had happened. But I sez nothin' in reply to this +expirin' note of the crysis he had passed through, knowin' this +was not the time for silver speech but for golden silence, and so +we meandered onwards. + +And it wuz anon that we see in the distance a fair white female a +standin' kinder still in the edge of the woods, and Josiah spoke +in a seemin'ly careless way, and sez he, "She don't seem to have +many clothes on, Samantha." + +Sez I, "Hush, Josiah! she has probably overslept herself, and come +out in a hurry, mebby to look for some herbs or sunthin'. I +persoom one of her childern are sick, and she sprung right up out +of bed, and come out to get some weather-wort, or catnip, or +sunthin'." + +And as I spoke I drawed Josiah down a side path away from her. +But he stopped stun still and sez he, "Mebby I ought to go and +help her Samantha." + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen, sense I lived with you, I don't think I have +been shamder of you;" sez I, "it would mortify her to death if she +should mistrust you had seen her in that condition." + +"Wall," sez he, still a hangin' back, "if the child is very sick, +and I can be any help to her, it is my duty to go." + +His eye had been on her nearly every moment of the time, in spite +of my almost voyalent protests, and sez he, kinder excited like, +"She is standin' stun still, as if she is skarit; mebby there is a +snake in front of her or sunthin', or mebby she is took paralysed, +I'd better go and see." + +Sez I, in low, deep axents, "You stay where you be, Josiah Allen, +and I will go forward, bein' 2 females together, it is what it is +right to do and if we need your help I will holler." + +And finally he consented after a parlay. + +Wall, as I got up to her I see she wuzn't a live, meat woman, but +a statute and so I hastened back to my Josiah and told him there +wuzn't no need of his help and he wuz in the right on't -- she wuz +stun still." + +He said he guessed we'd better go that way. And I sez, "No, +Josiah, I want to go round by the other road." + +Wall, we got back to our abode perfectly tuckered out, but +perfectly happy. And we concluded that after dinner we would set +out and see the different springs and partake of 'em. Had it not +been for our almost frenzied haste to get away from parasols and +dogs and destraction into a place of rest we should have beheld +them sooner. And our afternoon's adventures I will relate in +another epistol. + + + + +VII. + +SEEING THE DIFFERENT SPRINGS. + + +Immegeatly after dinner (a good one) Josiah Allen, Ardelia Tutt +and me sot out to view and look at the different springs and to +partake of the same. We hadn't drinked a drop of it as yet. +Ardelia had come over to go with us. She had on a kind of a +yellowish drab dress and a hat made of the same, with some drab +and blue bows of ribbon and some pink holly-hawks in it, and she +had some mits on (her hands prespired dretfully, and she sweat +easy). As I have said, she is a good lookin' girl but soft. And +most any dress she puts on kinder falls into the same looks. It +may be quite a hard lookin' dress before she puts it on, but +before she has wore it half a hour it will kinder crease down into +the softest lookin, thing you ever see. And so with her bonnets, +and mantillys, and everything. + +The down onto a goslin's breast never looked softer than every rag +she had on this very afternoon, and no tender goslin' itself wuz +ever softer than she wuz on the inside on't. But that didn't +hinder my likin' her. + +Wall, anon, or a little before, we came to that long, long +buildin', beautiful and dretful ornimental, but I could see plain +by daylight what I had mistrusted before, that it wuzn't built for +warmth. It must be dretful cold in the winter, and I don't see +how the wimmen folks of the home could stand it, unless they hang +up bed quilts and blankets round the side, and then, I should +think they would freeze. They couldn't keep their house plants +over winter any way - and I see they had sights of 'em - unless +they kep' 'em down suller. + +But howsumever, that is none of my lookout. If they want to be so +fashionable, as to try to live out doors and in the house too, +that is none of my business. And of course it looked dretful +ornimental and pretty. But I will say this, it haint bein' mejum. +I should rather live either out doors, or in the house, one of the +2. But I am a eppisodin'. And to resoom. + +Josiah Allen paid the money demanded of him and we went in and +advanced onwards to where a boy wuz a pullin' up the water and +handin' of it round. + +It looked dretful bubblin' and sparklin'. Why sunthin' seemed to +be a sparklin' up all the time in the water and I thought to +myself mebby it wuz water thoughts, mebby it wanted to tell +sunthin', mebby it has all through these years been a tryin' to +bubble up and sparkle out in wisdom but haint found any one yet +who could understand its liquid language. Who knows now? + +I took my glass and looked close - sparkle, sparkle, up came the +tiny thought sparks! But I wuzn't wise enough to read the +glitterin' language. No I wuzn't deep enough. It would take a +deep mind, mebby thousands of feet deep, to understand the great +glowin' secret that it has been a tryin' to reveal and couldn't. +Mebby it has been a tryin' to tell of big diamond mines that it +has passed through - great cliffs and crags of gold sot deep with +the crystalized dew of diamonds. + +But no, I didn't believe that wuz it. That wouldn't help the +world, only to make it happier, and these seemed to me to be +dretful inspirin', upliftin' thoughts. No, mebby it is a tryin' +to tell a cold world about a way to heat it. Mebby it has been a +runnin' over and is sparklin' with bright thoughts about how deep +underneath the earth lay a big fireplace, that all the cold +beggars of mortality could set round and warm their frozen fingers +by, - a tryin' to tell how the heat of that fire that escapes now +up the chimbleys of volcanoes, and sometimes in sudden drafts +blows out sideways into earthquakes, etc., could be utilized by +conveyin' it up on top of the ground, and have it carried into the +houses like Croton water. Who knows now? Mebby that is it! + +Oh! I felt that it would be a happy hour for Samantha when she +could bile her potatoes by the heat of that large noble fire-place. +And more than that, far more wuz the thought that heat might become, +in the future, as cheap as cold. That the little cold hands that +freeze every winter in the big cities, could be stretched out before +the big generous warmth of that noble fire-place. And who built +that fire in the first place? Who laid the first sticks on the +handirons, and put the match to it? Who wuz it that did it, and +how did he look, and when wuz he born, and why, and where? + +These, and many other thoughts of similar size and shape, filled +my brane almost full enough to lift up the bunnet, that reposed +gracefully on my foretop, as I stood and held the sparklin' glass +in my hands. + +Sparkle! sparkle! sparkle! what wuz it, it wuz a tryin' to say to +me and couldn't? Good land! I couldn't tell, and Josiah +couldn't, I knew instinctively he couldn't, though I didn't ask +him. + +No, I turned and looked at that beloved man, for truly I had for +the time bein' been by the side of myself, and I see that he wuz +a drinkin' lavishly of the noble water. I see that he wuz a +drinkin' more than wuz for his good, his linement showed it, and +sez I, for he wuz a liftin' another tumbler full onto his lips, +sez I, "Pause, Josiah Allen, and don't imbibe too much." + +"Why," he whispered, "you can drink all you are a mind to for 5 +cents. I am bound for once, Samantha Allen, to get the worth of +my money." + +And he drinked the tumbler full down at one swoller almost, and +turned to the weary boy for another. He looked bad, and eager, +and sez I, "How many have you drinked?" + +Sez he, in a eager, animated whisper, "9." And he whispered in +the same axents, "5 times 9 is 45 ; if it had been to a fair, or +Fourth of July, or anything, it would have cost me 45 cents, and +if it had been to a church social - lemme see - 9 times 10 is 90. +It would have cost me a dollar bill! And here I am a havin' it +all for 5 cents. Why," sez he, "I never see the beat on't in my +life." + +And ag'in he drinked a tumbler full down, and motioned to the +frightened boy for another. + +But I took him by the vest and whispered to him, sez I, "Josiah +Allen, do you want to die, because you can die cheap? Why," sez +I, "it will kill you to drink so much." + +"But think of the cheapness on't Samantha! The chance I have of +getting the worth of my money." + +But I whispered back to him in anxus axents and told him, that I +guessed if funeral expenses wuz added to that 5 cents it wouldn't +come so cheap, and sez I, "you wont live through many more glasses, +and you'll see you wont. Why," sez I, "you are a drowndin' out +your insides." + +He wuz fairly a gettin' white round the mouth, and I finally got +him to withdraw, though he looked back longingly at the tumblers +and murmured even after I had got him to the door, that it wuz a +dumb pity when anybody got a chance to get the worth of their +money, which wuzn't often, to think they couldn't take advantage +on it. + +And I sez back to him in low deep axents, "There is such a thing +as bein' too graspin', Josiah Allen." Sez I, "The children of +Israel used to want to lay up more manny than they wanted or +needed, and it spilte on their hands." And sez I, "you see if it +haint jest so with you; you have been in too great haste to enrich +yourself, and you'll be sorry for it, you see if you haint." + +And he was. Though he uttered language I wouldn't wish to repeat, +about the children of Israel and about me for bringin' of 'em up. +But the man wuz dethly sick. Why he had drinked 11 tumblers full, +and I trembled to think what would have follered on, and ensued, +if I hadn't interfered. As it wuz, he wuz confined to our abode +for the rest of the day. + +But I wouldn't have Josiah Allen blamed more than is due for this +little incedent, for it only illustrates a pervailin' trait in +men's nater, and sometimes wimmen's - a too great desire to amass +sudden riches, and when opportunity offers, burden themselves with +useless and wearysome and oft-times painful gear. + +They don't need it but seeing they have a chance to get it cheap, +"dog cheap " as the poet observes, why they weight themselves down +with it, and then groan under the burden of unnecessary and wearin' +wealth. This is a deep subject, deep as the well from which my +companion drinked, and nearly drinked himself into a untimely grave. + +Men heap up more riches than they can enjoy and then groan and +rithe under the taxes, the charity given, the envy, the noteriety, +the glare, and the glitter, the crowd of fortune-hunters and +greedy hangers-on, and the care and anxiety. They orniment the +high front of their houses with the paint, the gildin', the +fashion, and the show of enormous wealth, and while the crowd of +fashion-seekers and fortune-hunters pour in and out of the lofty +doorway they set out on the back stoop a groanin' and a sithin' at +the cares and sleepless anxietes of their big wealth, and then +they git up and go down street and try their best to heap up more +treasure to groan over. + +And wimmen now, when wuz there ever a woman who could resist a +good bargain? Her upper beauro draws may be a runnin' over with +laces and ribbons, but let her see a great bargain sold for +nothin' almost, and where is the female woman that can resist +addin' to that already too filled up beauro draw. + +A baby, be he a male, or be he a female child, when he has got a +appel in both hands, will try to lay holt of another, if you hold +it out to him. It is human nater. Josiah must not be considered +as one alone in layin' up more riches than he needed. He suffered, +and I also, for sech is the divine law of love, that if one member +of the family suffers, the other members suffer also, specially +when the sufferin' member is impatient and voyalent is his distress, +and talks loud and angry at them who truly are not to blame. + +Now I didn't make the springs nor I wuzn't to blame for their +bein' discovered in the first place. But Josiah laid it to me. +And though I tried to make him know that it wuz a Injun that +discovered 'em first, he wouldn't gin in and seemed to think they +wouldn't have been there if it hadn't been for me. + +I hated to hear him go on so. And in the cause of Duty, I brung +up Sir William Johnson and others. But he lay there on the lounge, +and kep' his face turned resolute towards the wall, in a dretful +oncomfertable position (sech wuz his temper of mind), and said, +he never had heard of them, nor the springs nuther, and shouldn't +if it hadn't been for me. + +Why, sez I, "A Injun brought Sir William Johnson here on his +back." + +"Wall," sez he, cross as a bear, "that is the way you'll have to +take me back, if you go on in this way much longer." + +"In what way, Josiah?" sez I. + +"Why a findin' springs and draggin' a man off to 'em, and makin' +him drink." + +"Why, Josiah Allen," sez I, "I told you not to drink - don't you +remember?" + +"No! I don't remember nuthin', nor don't want to. I want to go +to sleep!" sez he, snappish as anything, so I went out and let him +think if he wanted to, that I made the Springs, and the Minerals, +and the Gysers, and the Spoutin' Rock, and everything. Good land! +I knew I didn't; but I had to rest under the unkind insinnuation. +Such is some of the trials of pardners. + +But Josiah waked up real clever. And I brung him up some delicate +warm toast and some fragrant tea, and his smile on me wuz dretful +good-natured, almost warm. And I forgot all his former petulence +and basked in the rays of love and happiness that beamed on me out +of the blue sky of my companion's eyes. The clear blue sky that +held two stars, to which my heart turned. + +Such is some of the joys of pardners with which the world don't +meddle with, nor can't destroy. + +But to resoom. Ardelia sot down awhile in our room before she +went back to her boardin' house. I see she wuz a writin' for she +had a long lead pencil in her right hand and occasionally she +would lean her forrerd down upon it, in deep thought, and before +she went, she slipped the verses into my hand. + +Sez I, a lookin' over my specks at Ardelia after I had finished +readin' the verses: "What does 'ron' mean? I never heerd of that +word before, nor knew there wuz sech a one." + +Sez she, "I meant ran, but I s'pose it is a poetical license to +say 'ron,' don't you think so?" + +"Oh, yes," sez I, "I s'pose so, I don't know much about licenses, +nor don't want to, they are suthin' I never believed in. But," +sez I, for I see she looked red and overcasted by my remarks, "I +don't s'pose it will make any difference in a 100 years whether +you say ran or ron." + +But sez I, "Ardelia, it is a hot day, and I wouldn't write any +more if I wuz in your place. If you should heat your bra-, the +upper part of your head, you might not get over it for some time." + +"But," sez she, "you have told me sometimes to stop on account of +cold weather." + +"Wall," sez I, "most any kind of weather is hard on some kinds of +poetry." Sez I, "Poetry is sunthin' that takes particular kinds +of folks and weather to be successful." Sez I, "It is sunthin' +that can't be tampered with with impunity by Christians or world's +people. It is a kind of a resky thing to do, and I wouldn't write +any more to-day, Ardelia." + +And she heard to me and after a settin' a while with us, she went +back to Mr. Pixley's. + + + + +VIII. + +JOSIAH AND SAMANTHA TAKE A LONG WALK. + + +Wall, we hadn't been to Saratoga long before Aunt Polly Pixley +came over to see us, for Aunt Polly had been as good as her word +and had come to Saratoga, to her 2d cousins, the Mr. Pixley'ses, +where Ardelia wuz a stopping. Ardelia herself is a distant +relation to Aunt Polly, quite distant, about 40 or 50 miles +distant when they are both to home. + +Wall, the change in Aunt Polly is wonderful, perfectly wonderful. +She don't look like the same woman. + +She took her knittin' work and come in the forenoon, for a all +day's visit, jest as she wuz used to in the country, good old soul +- and I took her right to my room and done well by her, and we +talked considerable about other wimmen, not runnin' talk, but good +plain talk. + +She thinks a sight of the Saratoga water, and well she may, if +that is what has brung her up, for she wuz always sick in +Jonesville, kinder bedrid. And when she sot out for Saratoga she +had to have a piller to put on the seat behind her to sort a prop +her up (hen's feather). + +And now, she told me she got up early every mornin' and walked +down to the spring for a drink of the water - walked afoot. And +she sez, "It is astonishin' how much good that water is a doin' +me; for," sez she, "when I am to home I don't stir out of the +house from one day's end to the other; and here," sez she, "I set +out doors all day a'most, a listenin' to the music in the park +mornin' and evenin' I hear every strain on't." + +Aunt Polly is the greatest one for music I ever see, or hearn on. +And I sez to her, "Don't you believe that one great thing that is +helpin' you, is bein' where you are kep' gay and cheerful, - by +music and good company; and bein' out so much in the sunshine and +pure air." (Better air than Saratoga has got never wuz made; that +is my opinion and Josiah's too.) And sez I, "I lay a good deal to +that air." + +"No," she said, "it wuz the water." + +Sez I, "The water is good, I don't make no doubts on't." But I +continued calmly - for though I never dispute, I do most always +maintain my opinion - and I sez again calmly, "There has been a +great change in you for the better, sense you come here, Miss +Pixley. But some on't I lay to your bein' where things are so +much more cheerful and happyfyin'. You say you haint heerd a +strain of music except a base viol for over 14 years before you +come here. And though base viols if played right may be +melodious, yet Sam Pixley's base viol wuz a old one, and sort a +cracked and grumbly in tone, and he wuzn't much of a player +anyway, and to me, base viols always sounded kinder base anyway." + +And sez I, "Don't you believe a gettin' out of your little low +dark rooms, shaded by Pollard willers and grave stuns, and gettin' +out onto a place where you can heer sweet music from mornin' till +night, a liftin' you up and makin' you happier - don't you believe +that has sunthin' to do with your feelin' so much better - that +and the pure sweet air of the mountains comin' down and bein' +softened and enriched by the breath of the valley, and the minerals, +makin' a balmy atmosphere most full of balm - I lay a good deal to +that." + +"Oh no," sez she, "it is the water." + +"Yes," sez I, in a very polite way, - I will be polite, "the water +is good, first rate." + +But at that very minute, word come to her that she had company, +and she sot sail homewards immegetly, and to once. + +And now I don't care anything for the last word, some wimmen do, +but I don't. But I sez to her, as I watched her a goin' down the +stairway, steppin' out like a girl almost, sez I, "How well you do +seem, Aunt Polly; and I lay a good deal on't to that air." + +Now who would have thought she would speak out from the bottom of +the stairway and say, "No, it is the water?" + +Wall, the water is good, there haint no doubt, and anyway, through +the water and the air, and bein' took out of her home cares, and +old surroundin's onto a brght happy place, the change in Polly +Pixley is sunthin' to be wondered at. + +Yes, the water is good. And it is dretful smart, knowin' water +too. Why, wouldn't anybody think that when it all comes from the +same place, or pretty nigh the same place anyway, that they would +get kinder flustrated and mixed up once in a while? + +But they don't. These hundreds and thousands of years, and I +don't know how much longer, they have kep' themselves separate +from each other, livin' nigh neighbors there down under the +ground, but never neighborin' with each other, or intermarryin' in +each other's families. No, they have kep' themselves apart, +livin' exclosive down below and bubblin' up exclosive. + +They know how to make each other keep their proper distance, and I +s'pose through all the centuries to come they will bubble up, +right side by side, entirely different from each other. + +Curius, hain't it? Dretful smart, knowin' waters they be, fairly +sparklin' and flashin' with light and brightness, and intelligence. +They are for the healin' and refreshin' of ,the nations, and the +nations are all here this summer, a bein' healed by 'em. But still +I lay a good deal to that air. + +Amongst the things that Aunt Polly told me about wimmen that day, +wuz this, that Ardelia Tutt had got a new Bo, Bial Flamburg, by +name. + +She said Mr. Flamburg had asked Ardelia's 3d cousin to introduce +him to her, and from that time his attentions to her had been +unremittent, voyalent, and close. She said that to all human +appearance he wuz in love with her from his hat band down to his +boots and she didn't know what the result would be, though she +felt that the situation wuz dangerus, and more'n probable Abram +Gee had more trouble ahead on him. (Aunt Polly jest worships +Abram Gee, jest as everybody duz that gets to know him well.) +And I too, felt that the situation wuz dubersome. For Ardelia I +knew wuz one of the soft little wimmen that has got to have men +a trailin' round after 'em; and her bein' so uncommon tender +hearted, and Mr. Flamburg so deep in love, I feared the result. + +Wall, I wuz jest a thinkin' of this that day after dinner when +Josiah proposed a walk, so we sot out. He proposed we should walk +through the park, so we did. The air wuz heavenly sweet and that +park is one of the most restful and beautiful places this side of +Heaven, or so it seemed to us that pleasant afternoon. The music +was very soft and sweet that day, sweet with a undertone of +sadness, some like a great sorrowful soul in a beautiful body. + +The balmy south wind whispered through the branches of the bendin' +trees on the hill where we sot. The light was a shinin' and a +siftin' down through the green leaves, in a soft golden haze, and +the music seemed to go right up into them shadowy, shinin' pathways +of golden misty light, a climbin' up on them shadowy steps of mist +and gold, and amber, up, up into the soft depths of the blue +overhead - up to the abode of melody and love. + +Down the hill in the beautiful little valley, all amongst the +fountains and windin' walks and white statutes, and green, green, +grass, little children wuz a playin'. Sweet little toddlers, jest +able to walk about, and bolder spirits, though small, a trudgin' +about with little canes, and jumpin' round, and havin' a good +time. + +Little boys and little girls (beautiful creeters, the hull on +'em), for if their faces, every one on 'em, wuzn't jest perfect! +They all had the beauty of childhood and happiness. And crowds of +older folks wuz there. And some happy young couples, youths and +maidens, wuz a settin' round, and a wanderin' off by themselves, +and amongst them we see the form of Ardelia, and a young man by +her side. + +She wuz a leanin' on the stun railin' that fences in the trout +pond. She wuz evidently a lookin' down pensively at the shinin' +dartin' figures of the trout, a movin' round down in the cool +waters. + +I wuzn't nigh enough to 'em to see really how her companion +looked, but even at that distance I recognized a certain air and +atmosphere a surroundin' Ardelia that I knew meant poetry. + +And Josiah recognized it too, and he sez to me, "We may as well go +round the hill and out to the road that way," sez he, (a pointin' +to the way furthest from Ardelia) "and we may as well be a goin'." + +That man abhors poetry. + +Wall, we wandered down into the high way and havin' most the hull +afternoon before us, we kinder sauntered round amongst the stores +that wuz pretty nigh to where we wuz. There is some likely good +lookin' stores kep' by the natives, as they call the stiddy +dwellers in Saratoga. Good lookin' respectable stores full of +comfort and consolation, for the outer or inner man or woman. (I +speak it in a mortal sense). + +But with the hundred thousand summer dwellers, who flock here with +the summer birds, and go out before the swallers go south, there +comes lots of summer stores, and summer shops, and picture +studios, etc., etc. Like big summer bird's-nests, all full and a +runnin' over with summer wealth, to be blowed down by the autumn +winds. These shops are full of everything elegant and beautiful +and useful. The most gorgeous vases and plaks and chiner ware of +every description and color, and books, and jewelry, and rugs, and +fans, and parasols, and embroideries, and laces, and etc., etc., +etc. + +And one shop seemed to be jest full of drops of light, light and +sunshine, crystalized in golden, clear, tinted amber. There wuz a +young female statute a standin' up in the winder of that store +with her hands outstretched and jest a drippin' with the great +glowin' amber drops. Some wuz a hangin' over her wings for she +was a young flyin' female. And I thought to myself it must be she +would fly better with all that golden light a drippin' about her. + +Josiah liked her looks first rate. And he liked the looks of some +of the pictures extremely. There wuz lots of places all full of +pictures. A big collection of water colors, though as Josiah said +and well said, How they could get so many colors out of water wuz +a mystery to him. + +But my choice out of all the pictures I see, wuz a little one +called "The Sands of Dee." It wuz "Mary a callin' the cattle +home." The cruel treacherus water wuz a risin' about her round +bare ankles as she stood there amongst the rushes with her little +milk-bucket on her arm. + +Her pretty innocent face wuz a lookin' off into the shadows, and +the last ray of sunset was a fallin' on her. Maybe it wuz the +pity on't that struck so hard as I looked at it, to know that the +"cruel, crawli'n foam" wuz so soon to creep over the sweet young +face and round limbs. And there seemed to be a shadow of the +comin' fate, a sweepin' in on the gray mist behind her. + +I stood for some time, and I don't know but longer, a lookin' at +it, my Josiah a standin' placidly behind me, a lookin' over my +shoulder and enjoyin' of it too, till the price wuz mentioned. +But at that fearful moment, my pardner seized me by the arm, and +walked me so voyalently out of that store and down the walk that I +did not find and recover myself till we stood at the entrance to +Philey street. + +And I wuz so out of breath, by his powerful speed, that she didn't +look nateral to me, I hardly recognized Philey. But Josiah +hurried me down Philey and wanted to get my mind offen Mary Dee I +knew, for he says as we come under a sign hangin' down over the +road, "Horse Exchange," sez he, "What do you say, Samantha, do you +spose I could change off the old mair, for a camel or sunthin'? +How would you like a camel to ride?" + +I looked at him in speechless witherin' silence, and he went on +hurridly, "It would make a great show in Jonesville, wouldn't it, +to see us comin' to meetin' on a camel, or to see us ridin' in a +cutter drawed by one. I guess I'll see about it, some other +time." + +And he went on hurridly, and almost incoherently as we see another +sign, over the road - oh! how vollubly he did talk - "Quick, +Livery." + +"I hate to see folks so dumb conceeted! Now I don't spose that +man has got any hosses much faster than the old mair." + +"'Wing's!' Shaw! I don't believe no such thing - a livery on +wings. I don't believe a word on't. And you wouldn't ketch me on +one on 'em, if they had!" + +"'Yet Sing!"' sez he, a lookin' accost the street into a laundry +house. "What do I care if you do sing? 'Taint of much account if +you do any way. I sing sometimes, I yet sing," says he. + +"Sing," sez I in neerly witherin' tone. "I'd love to hear you +sing, I haint yet and I've lived with you agoin' on 30 years." + +"Wall, if you haint heerd me, it is because you are deef," sez he. + +But that is jest the way he kep' on, a hurryin' me along, and a +talkin' fast to try to get the price of that picture out of my +head. Anon, and sometimes oftener, we would come to the word in +big letters on signs, or on the fence, or the sides of barns, +"Pray." And sometimes it would read, "Pray for my wife!" And +Josiah every time he came to the words would stop and reflect on +'em. + +"`Pray!' What business is it of yourn, whether I pray or not? +`Pray for my wife!' That haint none of your business." + +Sez he, a shakin' his fist at the fence, "'Taint likely I should +have a wife without prayin' for her. She needs it bad enough," +sez he once, as he stood lookin' at it. + +I gin him a strange look, and he sez, "You wouldn't like it, would +you, if I didn't pray for you?" + +"No," sez I, "and truly as you say, the woman who is your wife +needs prayer, she needs help, morn half the time she duz." + +He looked kinder dissatisfied at the way I turned it, but he sez, +"'Plumbin' done here!'" + +"I'd love to know where they are goin' to plum. I don't see no +sign of plum trees, nor no stick to knock 'em off with." And agin +he sez, "You would make a great 'fuss, Samantha, if I should say +what is painted up right there on that cross piece. You would say +I wuz a swearin'." + +Sez I coldly, (or as cold as I could with my blood heated by the +voyalence and rapidity of the walk he had been a leadin' me,) +"There is a Van in front of it. Van Dam haint swearin'." + +"You would say it wuz if I used it," sez he reproachfully. "If I +should fall down on the ice, or stub my toe, and trip up on the +meetin' house steps, and I should happen to mention the name of +that street about the same time, you would say I wuz a swearin'." + +I did not reply to him; I wouldn't. And ag'in he hurried me on'ards +by some good lookin' bildin's, and trees, and tavrens, and cottages, +and etc., etc., and we come to Caroline street, and Jane, and +Matilda, and lots of wimmen's names. + +And Josiah sez, "I'll bet the man that named them streets wuz love +sick!" + +But he wuzn't no such thing. It was a father that owned the land, +and laid out the streets, and named 'em for his daughters. Good +old creeter! I wuzn't goin' to have him run at this late day, and +run down his own streets too. + +But ag'in Josiah hurried me on'ards. And bimeby we found +ourselves a standin' in front of a kind of a lonesome lookin' +house, big and square, with tall pillows in front. It wuz a +standin' back as if it wuz a kinder a drawin' back from company, +in a square yard all dark and shady with tall trees. And it all +looked kinder dusky, and solemn like. And a bystander a standin' +by told us that it wuz "ha'nted." + +Josiah pawed at it, and shawed at the idee of a gost. + +But I sez, "There! that is the only thing Saratoga lacked to make +her perfectly interestin', and that is a gost!" + +But agin Josiah pawed at the idee, and sez, "There never wuz such +a thing as a gost! and never will be." And sez he, "what an +extraordenary idiot anybody must be to believe in any sech thing." +And ag'in he looked very skernful and high-headed, and once ag'in +he shawed. + +And I kep' pretty middlin' calm and serene and asked the +bystander, when the gost ha'nted, and where? + +And he said, it opened doors and blowed out lights mostly, and +trampled up stairs. + +"Openin', and blowin', and tramplin'," sez I dreamily. + +"Yes," sez the man, "that's what it duz." + +And agin Josiah shawed loud. And agin I kep' calm, and sez I, +"I'd give a cent to see it." And sez I, "Do you suppose it would +blow out and trample if we should go in?" + +But Josiah grasped holt of my arm and sez, "'Taint safe! my dear +Samantha! don't le's go near the house." + +"Why? " sez I coldly, "you say there haint no sech thing as a +gost, what are you afraid on?" + +His teeth wuz fairly chatterin'. "Oh! there might be spiders +there, or mice, it haint best to go." + +I turned silently round and started on, for my companion's looks +was pitiful in the extreme. But I merely observed this, as we +wended onwards, "I have always noticed this, Josiah Allen, that +them that shaw the most at sech things, are the ones whose teeth +chatter when they come a nigh 'em, showin' plain that the shawers +are really the ones that believe in 'em." + +"My teeth chattered," sez he, "because my gooms ache." + +"Well," sez I, "the leest said the soonest mended." And we went +on fast ag'in by big houses and little, and boardin' houses, and +boardin' houses, and boardin' houses, and tavrens, and tavrens, +and he kept me a walkin' till my feet wuz most blistered. + +I see what his aim wuz; I had recognized it all the hull time. + +But as we went up the stairway into our room, perfectly tuckered +out, both on us, I sez to him, in weary axents, "That picture wuz +cheap enough, for the money, wuzn't it?" + +He groaned aloud. And sech is my love for that man, that the +minute I heard that groan I immegetly added, "Though I hadn't no +idee of buyin' it, Josiah." + +Immegetly he smiled warmly, and wuz very affectionate in his +demeener to me for as much as two hours and a half. Sech is the +might of human love. + +His hurryin' me over them swelterin' and blisterin' streets, and +showin' me all the beauty and glory of the world, and his +conversation had no effect, skercely on my mind. But what them +hours of frenzied effert could not accomplish, that one still, +small groan did. I love that man. I almost worship him, and he +me, vise versey, and the same. + +We found that Ardelia Tutt had been to see us in our absence. She +had been into our room I see, for she had dropped one of her mits +there. And the chambermaid said she had been in and waited for us +quite a spell - the young man a waitin' below on the piazza, so I +s'posed. + +I expect Ardelia wanted to show him off to us and I myself wuz +quite anxus to see him, feelin' worried and oncomfertable about +Abram Gee and wantin' to see if this young chap wuz anywhere nigh +as good as Abram. + +Well about a hour after we came back, Josiah missed his glasses he +reads with. And we looked all over the house for 'em, and under +the bed, and on the ceilin', and through our trunks and bandboxes, +and all our pockets, and in the Bible, and Josiah's boots, and +everywhere. And finely, after givin' 'em up as lost, the idee +come to us that they might possibly have ketched on the fringe of +Ardelia's shawl, and so rode home with her on it. + +So we sent one of the office-boys home with her mit and asked her +if she had seen Josiah's glasses. And word come back by the boy +that she hadn't seen 'em, and she sent word to me to look on my +pardner's head for 'em, and sure enough there we found 'em, right +on his foretop, to both of our surprises. + +She sent also by the boy a poem she had wrote that afternoon, and +sent word how sorry she wuz I wuzn't to home to see Mr. Flamburg. +But I see him only a day or two after that, and I didn't like his +looks a mite. + +But he said, and stuck to it, that his father owned a large bank, +that he wuz a banker, and a doin' a heavy business. + +Wall, that raised him dretfully in Ardelia's eyes; she owned up to +me that it did. She owned to me that she lead always thought she +would love to be a Banker's Bride. She thought it sounded rich. +She said, "banker sounded so different from baker." + +I sez to her coolly, that "it wuz only a difference of one letter, +and I never wuz much of a one to put the letter N above any of the +others, or to be haughty on havin' it added to, or diminished from +my name." + +But she kep' on a goin' with him. She told me it wuz real +romanticle the way he got aquanted with her. He see her onbeknown +to her one day, when she wuz a writin' a poem on one of the +benches in the park. + +"A Poem on a Bench!" + +She wuz a settin' on the bench, and a writin' about it, she was a +writin' on the bench in two different ways. Curius, haint it? + +But to resoom. He immegetly fell in love with her. And he got a +feller who wuz a boardin' to his boardin' place to interduce him +to Ardelia's relative, Mr. Pixley, and Mr. Pixley interduced him +to Ardelia. He told Ardelia's relatives the same story - That +his father wuz a banker, that he owned a bank and wuz doin' a +heavy business. + +Wall, I watched that young chap, and watched him close, and I see +there wuz one thing about him that could be depended on, he wuz +truthful. + +He seemed almost morbid on the subject, and would dispute himself +half a hour, to get a thing or a story he wuz tellin' jest exactly +right. But he drinked; that I know for I know the symptoms. +Coffee can't blind the eyes of her that waz once Smith, nor +peppermint cast a mist before 'em. My nose could have took its +oath, if noses wuz ever put onto a bar of Justice - my nose would +have gin its firm testimony that Bial Flamburg drinked. + +And there wuz that sort of a air about him, that I can't describe +exactly - a sort of a half offish, half familier and wholly +disagreeable mean, that can be onderstood but not described. No, +you can't picture that liniment, but you can be affected by it. +Wall, Bial had it. + +And I kep' on a not likin' him, and kep' stiddy onwards a likin' +Abram Gee. I couldn't help it, nor did'nt want to. And I looked +out constant to ketch him in some big story that would break him +right down in Ardelia's eyes, for I knew if she had been brought +up on any one commandment more'n another, it wuz the one ag'inst +lyin'. She hated lyin'. + +She had been brought up on the hull of the commandments but on +that one in particeler; she wuz brung up sharp but good. But not +one lie could I ketch him in. And he stuck to it, that his father +wuz a banker and doin' a heavy business. + +Wall, it kep' on, she a goin' with him through ambition, for I see +plain, by signs I knoo, that she didn't love him half as well as +she did Abram. And I felt bad, dretful bad, to set still and see +Ambition ondoin' of her. For oft and oft she would speak to me of +Bial's father's bank and the heft of the business he wuz a doin'. + +And I finally got so worked up in my mind that I gin a sly hint to +Abram Gee, that if he ever wanted to get Ardelia Tutt, he had +better make a summer trip to Saratoga. I never told Ardelia what +I had done, but trusted to a overrulin' destiny, that seems to +enrap babys, and lunatiks, and soft little wimmen, when their +heads get kinder turned by a man, and to Abram's honest face when +she should compare it with Bial Flamburg's, and to Abram's pure, +sweet breath with that mixture of stale cigars, tobacco, beer, and +peppermint. + +But Abram wrote back to me that his mother wuz a lyin' at the +p'int of death with a fever - that his sister Susan wuz sick a bed +with the same fever and couldn't come a nigh her and he couldn't +leave what might be his mother's death-bed. And he sez, if +Ardelia had forgot him in so short a time, mebby it wuz the best +thing he could do, to try and forget her. Anyway, he wouldn't +leave his dying mother for anything or anybody. + +That wuz Abram Gee all over, a doin' his duty every time by bread +and humanity. But he added a postscript and it wuz wrote in a +agitated hand - that jest as soon as his mother got so he could +leave her, he should come to Saratoga. + + + + +IX. + +JOSIAH 'S FLIRTATIONS. + + +They say there is a sight of flirtin' done at Saratoga. I didn't +hear so much about it as Josiah did, naturally there are things +that are talked of more amongst men than women. Night after night +he would come home and tell me how fashionable it wuz, and pretty +soon I could see that he kinder wanted to follow the fashion. + +I told him from the first on't that he'd better let it entirely +alone. Says I, "Josiah Allen, you wouldn't never carry it through +successful if you should undertake it -- and then think of the +wickedness on't." + +But he seemed sot. He said "it wuz more fashionable amongst +married men and wimmen, than the more single ones," he said "it +wuz dretful fashionable amongst pardners."` + +"Wall," says I, "I shall have, nothin' to do with it, and I advise +you, if you know when you are well off, to let it entirely alone." + +"Of course," says he, fiercely, "You needn't have nothin' to do +with it. It is nothin' you would want to foller up. And I would +ruther see you sunk into the ground, or be sunk myself, than to +see you goin' into it. Why," says he, savagely, "I would tear a +man lim from lim, if I see him a tryin' to flirt with you." +(Josiah Allen worships me.) "But," says he, more placider like, +"men have to do things sometimes, that they know is too hard for +their pardners to do -- men sometimes feel called upon to do +things that their pardners don't care about -- that they haint +strong enough to tackle. Wimmen are fragile creeters anyway." + +"Oh, the fallacy of them arguments -- and the weakness of 'em. + +But I didn't say nothin' only to reiterate my utterance, that "if +he went into it, he would have to foller it up alone, that he +musn't expect any help from me." + +"Oh no!" says he. "Oh! certainly not." + +His tone wuz very genteel, but there seemed to be sumthin' strange +in it. And I looked at him pityin'ly over my specks. The hull +idea on it wuz extremely distasteful to me, this talk about +flirtin', and etc., at our ages, and with our stations in the +Jonesville meetin' house, and with our grandchildren. + +But I see from day to day that he wuz a hankerin' after it, and I +almost made up my mind that I should have to let him make a trial, +knowin' that experience wuz the best teacher, and knowin' that his +morals wuz sound, and he wuz devoted to me, and only went into the +enterprize because he thought it wuz fashionable. + +There wuz a young English girl a boardin' to the same place we +did. She dressed some like a young man, carried a cane, etc. But +she wuz one of the upper 10, and wuz as pretty as a picture, and I +see Josiah had kinder sot his eyes on her as bein' a good one to +try his experiment with. He thought she wuz beautiful. But good +land! I didn't care. I liked her myself. But I could see, though +he couldn't see it, that she wuz one of the girls who would flirt +with the town pump, or the meetin' house steeple, if she couldn't +get nobody else to flirt with. She wuz born so, but I suppose +ontirely unbeknown to her when she wuz born. + +Wall, Josiah Allen would set and look at her by the hour -- +dretful admirin'. But good land! I didn't care. I loved to look +at her myself. And then too I had this feelin' that his morals +wuz sound. But after awhile, I could see, and couldn't help +seein', that he wuz a tryin' in his feeble way to flirt with her. +And I told him kindly, but firmly, "that it wuz somethin' that I +hated to see a goin' on." + +But he says, "Well, dumb it all, Samantha, if anybody goes to a +fashionable place, they ort to try to be fashionable. 'Taint +nothin' I want to do, and you ort to know it." + +And I says in pityin' axents but firm, "If you don't want to, +Josiah, I wouldn't, fashion or no fashion." + +But I see I couldn't convince him, and there happened to be a +skercity of men jest then -- and he kep' it up, and it kep' me on +the key veav, as Maggie says, when she is on the tenter hooks of +suspense. + +I felt bad to see it go on, not that I wuz jealous, no, my foretop +lay smooth from day to day, not a jealous hair in it, not one -- +but I felt sorry for my companion. I see that while the endurin' +of it wuz hard and tejus for him (for truly he was not a addep at +the business; it come tuff, feerful tuff on him), the endin' wuz +sure to be harder. And I tried to convince him, from a sense of +duty, that she wuz makin' fun of him -- he had told me lots of the +pretty things she had said to him -- and out of principle I told +him that she didn't mean one word of 'em. But I couldn't convince +him, and as is the way of pardners, after I had sot the reasen and +the sense before him, and he wouldn't hear to me, why then I had +to set down and bear it. Such is some of the trials of pardners? + +Wall, it kep' agoin' on, and a goin' on, and I kep' a hatin' to +see it, for if anybody has got to flirt, which I am far from +approvin' of, but if I have got to see it a goin' on, I would fain +see it well done, and Josiah's efforts to flirt wuz like an effort +of our old mair to play a tune on the melodian, no grace in it, no +system, nor comfort to him, nor me. + +I s'pose the girl got some fun out of it; I hope she did, for if +she didn't it wuz a wearisome job all round. + +Wall, a week or so rolled on, and it wuz still in progress. And +one day an old friend of ours, Miss Ezra Balch, from the east part +of Jonesville, come to see me. She come to Saratoga for the +rheumatiz, and wuz gettin' well fast, and Ezra was gettin' entirely +cured of biles, for which he had come, carbunkles. + +Wall, she invited Josiah and me to take a ride with 'em, and we +both accepted of it, and at the appointed time I wuz ready to the +minute, down on the piazza, with my brown cotton gloves on, and my +mantilly hung gracefully over my arm. But at the last minute, +Josiah Allen said "he couldn't go." + +I says "Why can't you go?" + +"Oh," he says, kinder drawin' up his collar, and smoothin' down +his vest, "Oh, I have got another engagement." + +He looked real high-headed, and I says to him: + +"Josiah Allen didn't you promise Druzilla Balch that you would go +with her and Ezra to-day?" + +"Wall yes," says he, "but I can't." + +"Why not?" says I. + +"Wall, Samantha, though they are well meanin', good people, they +haint what you may call fashionable, they haint the upper 10." + +Says I, "Josiah Allen you have fell over 15 cents in my estimation, +sense we have begun talkin', you won't go with 'em because they +haint fashionable. They are good, honest Christian Methodists, +and have stood by you and me many a time, in times of trouble, +and now," says I, "you turn against 'em because they haint +fashionable." Says I, "Josiah Allen where do you think you'll +go to?" + +"Oh, probable down through Congress Park, and we may walk up as +fur as the Indian Encampment. I feel kinder mauger to-day, and my +corns ache feerful." (His boots wuz that small that they wuz +sights to behold, sights!) "We probably shan't walk fur," says +he. + +I see how 'twuze in a minute. That English girl had asked him to +walk with her, and my pardner had broken a solemn engagement with +Ezra and Druzilla Balch to go a walkin' with her. I see how +'twuz, but I sot in silence and one of the big rockin' chairs, and +didn't say nothin'. + +Finally he says, with a sort of a anxious look onto his foreward: + +"You don't feel bad, do you Samantha? You haint jealous, are +you?" + +"Jealous!" says I, a lookin' him calmly over from head to feet -- +it wuz a witherin' look, and yet pitiful, that took in the hull +body and soul, and weighed 'em in the balances of common sense, +and pity, and justice. It wuz a look that seemed to envelop him +all to one time, and took him all in, his bald head, his vest, and +his boots, and his mind (what he had), and his efforts to be +fashionable, and his trials and tribulations at it, and -- and +everything. I give him that one long look, and then I says: + +"Jealous? No, I haint jealous." + +Then silence rained again about us, and Josiah spoke out (his +conscience was a troublin' him), and he says: + +"You know in fashionable life, Samantha, you have to do things +which seem unkind, and Ezra, though a good, worthy man, can't +understand these things as I do." + +Says I: "Josiah Allen, you'll see the day that you'll be sorry for +your treatment of Druzilla Balch, and Ezra." + +"Oh wall," says he, pullin' up his collar, "I'm bound to be +fashionable. While I can go with the upper 10, it is my duty and +my privilege to go with 'em, and not mingle in the lower classes +like the Balches." + +Says I firmly, "You look out, or some of them 10 will be the death +of you, and you may see the day that you will be glad to leave +'em, the hull 10 of em, and go back to Druzilla and Ezra Balch." + +But what more words might have passed between us, wuz cut short by +the arrival of Ezra and Druzilla in a good big carriage, with Miss +Balch on the back seat, and Ezra acrost from her, and a man up in +front a drivin'. It wuz a good lookin' sight, and I hastened down +the steps, Josiah disappearin' inside jest as quick as he ketched +sight of their heads. + +They asked me anxiously "where Josiah wuz and why he didn't come?" +And I told 'em, "that Josiah had told me that mornin' that he felt +manger, and he had some corns that wuz a achin'." + +So much wuz truth, and I told it, and then moved off the subject, +and they seein' my looks, didn't pursue it any further. They +proposed to go back to their boardin' place, and take in Deacon +Balch, Ezra's brother from Chicago, who wuz stayin' there a few +days to recooperate his energies, and get help for tizick. So +they did. He wuz a widowed man. Yes, he was the widower of +Cornelia Balch who I used to know well, a good lookin' and a good +actin' man. And he seemed to like my appeerance pretty well, +though I am fur from bein' the one that ort to say it. + +And as we rolled on over the broad beautiful road towards Saratoga +Lake, I begun to feel better in my mind. + +The Deacon wuz edifyin' in conversation, and he thought, and said, +"that my mind was the heftiest one that he had ever met, and he +had met hundreds and hundreds of 'em." He meant it, you could see +that, he meant every word he said. And it wuz kind of comfortin' +to hear the Deacon say so, for I respected the Deacon, and I knew +he meant just what he said. + +He said, and believed, though it haint so, but the Deacon believed +it, "that I looked younger than I did the day I wuz married." + +I told him "I didn't feel so young." + +"Wall," he said, "then my looks deceived me, for I looked as +young, if not younger." + +Deacon Balch is a good, kind, Christian man. + +His conversation was very edifyin', and he looked kinder good, and +warm-hearted at me out of his eyes, which wuz blue, some the color +of my Josiah's. But alas! I felt that though some comforted and +edified by his talk, still, my heart was not there, not there in +that double buggy with 2 seats, but wuz afur off with my pardner. +I felt that Josiah Allen wuz a carryin' my heart with him wherever +he wuz a goin'. Curious, haint it? Now you may set and smile, +and talk, and seem to be enjoyin' yourself first-rate, with +agreeable personages all around you, and you do enjoy yourself +with that part of your nater. But with it all, down deep under +the laughs, and the bright words, the comfort you get out of the +answerin' laughs, the gay talk, under it all is the steady +consciousness that the real self is fur away, the heart, the soul +is fur away, held by some creeter whether he be high, or whether +he be low, it don't matter -- there your heart is, a goin' towards +happiness, or a travellin' towards pain as the case may be -- +curious, haint it? + +Wall, Ezra and Druzilla wanted to go to the Sulphur Springs way +beyend Saratoga Lake, and as the Deacon wuz agreeable, and I also, +we sot out for it, though, as we all said, it wuz goin' to be a +pretty long and tegus journey for a hot day. But we went along +the broad, beautiful highway, by the high, handsome gates of the +Racing Park, down, down, by handsome houses and shady woods, and +fields of bright-colored wild flowers on each side of the road, +down to the beautiful lake, acrost it over the long bridge, and +then into the long, cool shadows of the bendin' trees that bend +over the road on each side, while through the green boughs, jest +at our side we could ketch a sight of the blue, peaceful waters, a +lyin' calm and beautiful jest by the side of us -- on, on, through +the long, sheltered pathway, out into the sunshine for a spell, +with peaceful fields a layin' about us, and peaceful cattle a +wanderin' over 'em, and then into the shade agin, till at last we +see a beautiful mountin', with its head held kinder high, crowned +with ferns and hemlocks, and its feet washed by the cool water of +the beautiful lake. + +The shadows of this mountin', tree crowned, lay on the smooth, +placid wave, and a white sail boat wuz a comin' round the side +on't, and floatin' over the green, crystal branches, and golden +shadows. It wuz a fair seen, seen for a moment, and then away we +went into the green shadows of the woods again, round a corner, +and here we wuz, at the Sulphur Springs. + +It wuz a quiet peaceful spot. The house looked pleasant, and so +did the Landlord, and Landlady, and we dismounted and walked +through a long clean hall, and went out onto a back piazza and sot +down. And I thought as I sot there, that I would be glad enough +to set there, for some time. Everything looked so quiet and +serene. The paths leadin' up the hills in different directions, +out into the green woods, looked quiet; the pretty, grassy +backyard leadin' down to the water side looked green and +peaceable, and around all, and beyond all, wuz the glory of the +waters. They lay stretched out beautiful and in heavenly calm, +and the sun, which wuz low in the West, made a gold path acrost +'em, where it seemed as if one could walk over only a little ways, +into Perfect Repose. The Lake somehow looked like a glowin' +pavement, it didn't look like water, but it seemed like broad +fields of azure and palest lavender, and pinky grey, and pearly +white, and every soft and delicate color that water could be +crystalized into. And over all lay the glowin', tender sunset +skies -- it wuz a fair seen. And even as I looked on in a almost +rapped way, the sun come out from behind a soft cloud, and lay on +the water like a pillow of fire jest as I dream that pillow did, +that went ahead of my old 4 fathers. + +The rest on 'em seemed to be more intent on the lemonade with 2 +straws in 'em. I didn't make no fuss. They are nice, clean +folks, I make no doubt. I wouldn't make no fuss and tell on the +hired man -- women of the house have enough to worry 'em anyway. +But he had dropped some straws into our tumblers, every one on +'em, I dare presume to say they had been a fillin' straw ticks. I +jest took mine out in a quiet way, and throwed 'em to one side. +The rest on 'em, I see, and it wuz real good in 'em, drinked +through 'em, as we used to at school. It wuz real good in +Druzilla, and Ezra, and also in the Deacon. It kinder ondeared +the hull on 'em to me. I hope this won't be told of, it orto be +kep -- for he wuz a goodnatured lookin' hired man, black, but not +to blame for that -- and good land! what is a straw? -- anyway +they wuz clean. + +There wuz some tents sot up there in the back yard, lookin' some +as I s'pose our old 4 fathers tents did, in the pleasant summer +times of old. And I asked a bystander a standin' by, whose tents +they wuz, and he said they wuz Free Thinkers havin' a convention. + +And I says, "How free?" + +And he said "they wuz great cases to doubt everything, they +doubted whether they wuz or not, and if they wuz or when, and if +so, why?" + +And he says, "won't you stay to-night over and attend the meetin'?" + +And I says, "What are they goin' to teach tonight?" + +And he says, "The Whyness of the What" + +I says, "I guess that is too deep a subject for me to tackle," and +says I, "Don't they believe anything easier than that?" + +And he says, "They don't believe anything. That is their belief +-- to believe nothin'." + +"Nothin'!" says I. + +"Yes," says he, "Nothin'." And, says he, "to-morrer they are +goin' to prove beyond any question, that there haint any God, nor +anything, and never wuz anything." + +"Be they?" sez I. + +"Yes," says he, "and won't you come and be convinced?" + +I looked off onto the peaceful waters, onto the hills that lay as +the mountains did about Jerusalem, onto the pillow of fire that +seemed to hold in it the flames of that light that had lighted the +old world onto the mornin' of the new day, -- and one star had +come out, and stood tremblin' over the brow of the mountain and I +thought of that star that had riz so long time ago, and had guided +the three wise men, guided 'em jest alike from their three +different homes, entirely unbeknown to each other, guidin' 'em to +the cradle where lay the infant Redeemer of the world, so long +foretold by bard and prophet. I looked out onto the heavenly +glory of the day, and then inside into my heart, that held a faith +jest as bright and undyin' as the light of that star -- and I +says, "No, I guess I won't go and be convinced." + +Wall, we riz up to go most immediately afterwerds, and the Deacon +(he is very smart) observed: + +"How highly tickled and even highlarious the man seemed in talkin' +about there not bein' any future." And he says, "It wuz a good +deal like a man laughin' and clappin' his hands to see his house +burn down" + +And I sez, "it wuz far wurse, for his home wouldn't stand more'n a +100 years or so, and this home he wuz a tryin' to destroy, wuz one +that would last through eternity." "But," says I, "it hain't +built by hands, and I guess their hands hain't strong enough to +tear it down, nor high enough to set fire to it." + +And the Deacon says, "Jest so, Miss Allen, you spoke truthfully, +and eloquent." (The Deacon is very smart.) + +When we got into the buggy to start, the Deacon says, "I would +like to resoom the conversation with you, Josiah Allen's wife, a +goin' back." + +And Druzilla spoke right out and says, "I will set on the front +seat by Ezra." I says, "Oh no, Druzilla, I can hear the Deacon +from where I sot before." + +But the Deacon says, Talkin' loud towards night always offected +his voice onpleasantly, mebby Druzilla and he had better change +seats. + +Again I demurred. And then Druzilla said she must set by Ezra, +she wanted to tell him sumthin' in confidence. + +And so it wuz arraigned, for I felt that I wuz not the one to +come between pardners, no indeed. The road laid peacefuller and +beautifuller than ever, or so it seemed under the sunset glory +that sort o' hung round it. Jest about half way through the woods +we met the English girl, a stridin' along alone, each step more'n +3 feet long, or so it seemed to me. There wuz a look of health, +and happy determination on her forwerd as she strided rapidly by. + +I would have fain questioned her concernin' my pardner, as she +strode by, but before I could call out, or begon to her she wuz +far in the rearwerd, and goin' in a full pressure and in a knot of +several miles an hour. + +Wall, from that minute I felt strange and curious. And though +Druzilla and Ezra was agreeable and the Deacon edifyin', I didn't +seem to feel edified, and the most warm-hearted looks didn't seem +to warm my heart none, it wuz oppressed with gloomy forebodings +of, Where wuz my pardner? They had laid out to set out together. +Had they sot? This question was a goverin' me, and the follerin' +one: If they had sot out together, where wuz my pardner, Josiah +Allen, now? As I thought these feerful thoughts, instinctively I +turned around to see if I could see a trace of his companion in +the distance. Yes, I could ketch a faint glimpse of her as she +wuz mountin' a diclivity, and stood for an instant in sight, but +long before even, she disopeered agin, for her gait wuz +tremendous, and at a rate of a good many knots she wuz a goin', +that I knew. And the fearful thought would rise, Josiah Allen +could not go more than half a knot, if he could that. He wuz a +slow predestinatur any way, and then his corns was feerful, and +never could be told -- and his boots had in 'em the elements of +feerful sufferin'. It wuz all he could do when he had 'em on to +hobble down to the spring, and post-office. Where? where wuz he? +And she a goin' at the rate of so many knots. + +Oh! the agony of them several minutes, while these thoughts wuz +rampagin through my destracted brain. + +Oh! if pardners only knew the agony they bring onto their devoted +companions, by their onguarded and thoughtless acts, and +attentions to other females, gin without proper reseerch and +precautions, it would draw their liniments down into expressions +of shame and remorse. Josiah wouldn't have gone with her if he +had known the number of knots she wuz a goin', no, not one step -- +then why couldn't he have found out the number of them knots -- +why couldn't he? Why can't pardners look ahead and see to where +their gay attentions, their flirtations that they call mild and +innercent, will lead 'em to? Why can't they realize that it haint +only themselves they are injurin', but them that are bound to 'em +by the most sacred ties that folks can be twisted up in? Why +can't they realize that a end must come to it, and it may be a +fearful and a shameful one, and if it is a happiness that stops, +it will leave in the heart when happiness gets out, a emptiness, a +holler place, where like as not onhappiness will get in, and mebby +stay there for some time, gaulin' and heart-breakin' to the +opposite pardner to see it go on? + +If it is indifference, or fashion, or anything of that sort, why +it don't pay none of the time, it don't seem to me it duz, and the +end will be emptier and hollerer then the beginnin'. + +In the case of my pardner it wuz fashion, nothing but the +butterfly of fashion he wuz after, to act in a high-toned, +fashionable manner, like other fashionable men. And jest see the +end on't why he had brought sufferin' of the deepest dye onto his +companion, and what, what hed he brought onto himself -- onto his +feet? + +Oh! the agony of them several moments while them thoughts was a +rackin' at me. The moments swelled out into a half hour, it must +have been a long half hour, before I see far ahead, for the eyes +of love is keen - a form a settin' on the grass by the wayside, +that I recognized as the form of my pardner. As we drew nearer we +all recognized the figure -- but Josiah Allen didn't seem to +notice us. His boots was off, and his stockin's, and even in that +first look I could see the agony that was a rendin' them toes +almost to burstin'. Oh, how sorry I felt for them toes! He was a +restin' in a most dejected and melancholy manner on his hand, as +if it wuz more than sufferin' that ailed him -- he looked a +sufferer from remorse, and regret, and also had the air of one +whom mortification has stricken. + +He never seemed to sense a thing that wuz passin' by him, till the +driver pulled up his horses clost by him, and then he looked up +and see us. And far be it from me to describe the way he looked +in his lowly place on the grass. There wuz a good stun by him on +which he might have sot, but no, he seemed to feel too mean to get +up onto that stun; grass, lowly, unassumin' grass, wuz what seemed +to suit him best, and on it he sot with one of his feet stretched +out in front of him. + +Oh! the pitifulness of that look he gin us, oh! the meakinness of +it. And even, when his eye fell on the Deacon a settin' by my +side, oh! the wild gleam of hatred, and sullen anger that glowed +within his orb, and revenge! He looked at the Deacon, and then at +his boots, and I see the wild thought wuz a enterin' his sole, to +throw that boot at him. But I says out of that buggy the very +first thing the words I have so oft spoke to him in hours of +danger: + +"Joisiah, be calm!" + +His eye fell onto the peaceful grass agin, and he says: "Who +hain't a bein' calm? I should say I wuz calm enough, if that is +what you want." + +But, oh, the sullenness of that love. + +Says Ezra, good man -- he see right through it all in a minute, +and so did Druzilla and the Deacon -- says Ezra, "Get up on the +seat with the driver, Josiah Allen, and drive back with us." + +"No," says Josiah, "I have no occasion, I am a settin' here," +(looking round in perfect agony) "I am a settin' here to admire +the scenery." + +Then I leaned over the side of the buggy, and says I, "Josiah +Allen, do you get in and ride, it will kill you to walk back; put +on your boots if you can, and ride, seein' Ezra is so perlite as +to ask you." + +"Yes, I see he is very perlite, I see you have set amongst very +perlite folks, Samantha," says he, a glarin' at Deacon Balch as if +he would rend him from lim to lim, "But as I said, I have no +occasion to ride, I took off my boots and stockin's merely -- +merely to pass away time. You know at fashionable resorts," says +he, "it is sometimes hard for men to pass away time." + +Says I in low, deep accents, "Do put on your stockin's, and your +boots, if you can get 'em on, which I doubt, but put your +stockin's on this minute, and get in, and ride." + +"Yes," says Ezra, "hurry up and get in, Josiah Allen, it must be +dretful oncomfortabe a settin' down there in the grass." + +"Oh, no!" says Josiah, and he kinder whistled a few bars of no +tune that wuz ever heard on, or ever will be heard on agin, so +wild and meloncholy it wuz -- "I sot down here kind o' careless. +I thought seein' I hadn't much on hand to do at this time o' year, +I thought I would like to look at my feet -- we hain't got a very +big lookin' glass in our room." + +Oh, how incoherent and over-crazed he was a becomin'! Who ever +heard of seein' anybody's feet in a lookin' glass -- of dependin' +on a lookin' glass for a sight on 'em? Oh, how I pitied that man! +and I bent down and says to him in soothin' axents: "Josiah Allen, +to please your pardner you put on your stockin's and get into this +buggy. Take your boots in your hand, Josiah, I know you can't get +'em on, you have walked too far for them corns. Corns that are +trampled on, Josiah Allen, rise up and rends you, or me, or +anybody else who owns 'em or tramples on 'em. It hain't your +fault, nobody blames you. Now get right in." + +"Yes, do," says the Deacon. + +Oh! the look that Josiah Allen gin him. I see the voyolence of +that look, that rested first on the Deacon, and then on that, +boot. + +And agin I says, "Josiah Allen." And agin the thought of his own +feerful acts, and my warnin's came over him, and again +mortification seemed to envelop him like a mantilly, the tabs +goin' down and coverin' his lims -- and agin he didn't throw that +boot. Agin Deacon Balch escaped oninjured, saved by my voice, and +Josiah's inward conscience, inside of him. + +Wall, suffice it to say, that after a long parley, Josiah Allen +wuz a settin' on the high seat with the driver, a holdin' his +boots in his hand, for truly no power on earth could have placed +them boots on Josiah Allen's feet in the condition they then wuz. + +And so he rode on howewards, occasionally a lookin' down on the +Deacon with looks that I hope the recordin' angel didn't +photograph, so dire, and so revengeful, and jealous, and -- and +everything, they wuz. And ever, after ketchin' the look in my +eye, the look in his'n would change to a heart-rendin' one of +remorse, and sorrow, and shame for what he had done. And the +Deacon, wantin' to be dretful perlite to him, would ask him +questions, and I could see the side of Josiah's face, all glarin' +like a hyena at the sound of his voice, and then he would turn +round and ossume a perlite genteel look as he answered him, and +then he glare at me in a mad way every time I spoke to the Deacon, +and then his mad look would change, even to one of shame and +meakinness. And he in his stockin' feet, and a pertendin' that he +didn't put his boots on, because it wuzn't wuth while to put 'em +on agin so near bed-time. And he that sot out that afternoon a +feelin' so haughty, and lookin' down on Ezra and Druzilla, and +bein' brung back by 'em, in that condition -- and bein' goured all +the time by thoughts of the ignominious way his flirtin' had +ended, by her droppin' him by the side of the road, like a weed +she had trampled on too hardly. And a bein' gourded deeper than +all the rest of his agonies, by a senseless jealousy of Deacon +Balch -- and a thinkin' for the first time in his life, what it +would be, if her affections, that had been like a divine beacon to +him all his life, if that flame should ever go out, or ever +flicker in its earthly socket -- oh, those thoughts that he had +seemed to consider in his own mad race for fashion -- oh, how that +sass that had seemed sweet to him as a gander, oh how bitter and +poisonous it wuz to partake of as a goose. + +Oh! the agony of that ride. We went middlin' slow back -- and +before we got to Saratoga the English girl went past us, she had +been to the Sulphur Springs and back agin. She didn't pay no +attention to us, for she wuz alayin' on a plan in her own mind, +for a moonlight pedestrian excursion on foot, that evenin', out to +the old battle ground of Saratoga. + +Josiah never looked to the right hand or the left, as she passed +him, at many, many a knot an hour. And I felt that my pardner's +sufferin from that cause was over, and mine too, but oh! by what +agony wuz it gained. For 3 days and 3 nights he never stood on +any of his feet for a consecutive minute and a half, and I bathed +him with anarky, and bathed his very soul with many a sweet moral +lesson at the same time. And when at last Josiah Allen emerged +from that chamber, he wuz a changed man in his demeanor and +liniment, such is the power of love and womanly devotion. + +He never looked at a woman durin' our hull stay at Saratoga, save +with the eye of a philosopher and a Methodist. + + + +X. + +MISS G. WASHINGTON FLAMM. + +Miss G. Washington Flamm is a very fashionable woman. Thomas +Jefferson carried her through a law-suit, and carried her stiddy +and safe. (She wuz in the right on't, there haint no doubt of +that.) + +She had come to Jonesville for the summer to board, her husband +bein' to home at the time in New York village, down on Wall +street. He had to stay there, so she said. I don't know why, +but s'pose sunthin' wuz the matter with the wall; anyway he +couldn't leave it. And she went round to different places a good +deal for her health. There didn't seem to be much health round +where her husband wuz, so she had to go away after it, go a +huntin' for it, way over to Europe and back ag'in; and away off +to California, and Colorado, and Long Branch, and Newport, and +Saratoga, and into the Country. It made it real bad for Miss +Flamm. + +Now I always found it healthier where Josiah wuz than in any +other place. Difference in folks I s'pose. But they say there +is sights and sights of husbands and wives jest like Miss Flamm. +Can't find a mite of health anywhere near where their families +is, and have to poke off alone after it. It makes it real bad +for 'em. + +But anyway she came to Jonesville for her health. And she hearn +of Thomas Jefferson and employed him. It wuz money that fell +onto her from her father, or that should have fell, that she wuz +a tryin' to git it to fall. And he won the case. It fell. She +wuz rich as a Jew before she got this money, but she acted as +tickled over it as if she wuzn't worth a cent. (Human nater.) +She paid Thomas J. well and she and Maggie and he got to be quite +good friends. + +She is a well-meanin', fat little creeter, what there is of her. +I have seen folks smaller than she is, and then ag'in we seen +them that wuzn't so small. She is middlin' good lookin', not old +by any means, but there is a deep wrinkle plowed right into her +forward, and down each side of her mouth. They are plowed deep. +And I have always wondered to myself who held the plow. + +It wuz'nt age, for she haint old enough. Wuz it Worry? That +will do as good a day's work a plowin' as any creeter I ever see, +and work as stiddy after it gits to doin' day's works in a +female's face. + +Waz it Dissatisfaction and Disappointment? They, too, will plow +deep furrows and a sight of 'em. I don't know what it wuz. +Mebby it wuz her waist and sleeves. Her sleeves wuz so tight +that they kep' her hands lookin' a kinder bloated and swelled all +the time, and must have been dretful painful. And her waist -- +it wuz drawed in so at the bottom, that to tell the livin' truth +it wuzn't much bigger'n a pipe's tail. It beat all to see the +size immegatly above and below, why it looked perfectly +meraculous. She couldn't get her hands up to her head to save +her life; if she felt her head a tottlin' off her shoulders she +couldn't have lifted her hands to have stiddied it, and, of +course, she couldn't get a long breath, or short ones with any +comfort. + +Mebby that worried her, and then ag'in, mebby it wuz dogs. I +know it would wear me out to take such stiddy care on one, day +and night. I never seemed to feel no drawin's to take care of +animals, wash 'em, and bathe 'em, and exercise 'em, etc., etc., +never havin' been in the menagery line and Josiah always keepin' +a boy to take care of the animals when he wuzn't well. Mebby it +wuz dogs. Anyway she took splendid care of hern, jest wore +herself out a doin' for it stiddy day and night and bein' +trampled on, and barked at almost all the time she wuz a bringin' +on it up. + +Yes, she took perfectly wonderful care on't, for a woman in her +health. She never had been able to take any care of her +children, bein' VERY delicate. Never had been well enough to +have any of 'em in the room with her nights, or in the day time +either. They tired her so, and she wuz one of the wimmen who +felt it wuz her DUTY to preserve her health for her family's +sake. Though WHEN they wuz a goin' to get the benefit of her +health I don't know. + +But howsumever she never could take a mite of care of her +children, they wuz brought up on wet nurses, and bottles, etc., +etc., and wuz rather weakly, some on 'em. The nurses, wet and +dry ones both, used to gin 'em things to make 'em sleep, and +kinder yank 'em round and scare 'em nights to keep 'em in the +bed, and neglect 'em a good deal, and keep 'em out in the brilin' +sun when they wanted to see their bows; and for the same reeson +keepin' em out in their little thin dresses in the cold, and +pinch their little arms black and blue if they went to tell any +of their tricks. And they learnt the older ones to be deceitful +and sly and cowerdly. Learnt 'em to use jest the same slang +phrases and low language that they did; tell the same lies, and +so they wuz a spilin' 'em in every way; spilin' their brains with +narcotics, their bodies by neglect and bad usage, and their minds +and morals by evil examples. + +You see some nurses are dretful good. But Miss Flamm's health +bein' so poor and her mind bein' so took up with fashion, dogs, +etc., that she couldn't take the trouble to find out about their +characters and they wuz dretful poor unbeknown to her. She had +dretful bad luck with 'em, and the last one drinked, so I have +been told. + +Yes, it made it dretful bad for Miss Flamm that her health was so +poor, and her fashionable engagements so many and arduous that +she didn't have the time to take a little care of her children +and the dog too. For you could see plain, by the care that she +took of that dog, what a splendid hand she would be with the +children, if she only had the time and health. + +Why, I don't believe there wuz another dog in America, either the +upper or lower continent, that had more lovin', anxus, +intelligent, devoted attention than that dog had, day and night, +from Miss Flamm. She took 2 dog papers, so they say, to get the +latest information on the subject; she compared notes with other +dog wimmen, I don't say it in a runnin' way at all. I mean +wimmen who have gin their hull minds to dog, havin', some on 'em, +renounced husbands, and mothers, and children for dog sake. + +You know there are sich wimmen, and Miss Flamm read up and +studied with constant and absorbed attention all the latest +things on dog. Their habits, their diet, their baths, their +robes, their ribbons, and bells, and collars, their barks -- +nothin' escaped her; she put the best things she learned into +practice, and studied out new ones for herself. She said she had +reduced the subject to a science, and she boasted proudly that +her dog, the last one she had, went ahead of any dog in the +country. And I don't know but it did. I knew it had a good +healthy bark. A loud strong bark that must have made it bad for +her in the night. It always slept with her, for she didn't dast +to trust it out of her sight nights. It had had some spells in +the night, kinder chills, or spuzzums like, and she didn't dast +to be away from it for a minute. + +She wouldn't let the wet nurse tech it, for her youngest child, +little G. Washington Flamm, Jr., wuzn't very healthy, and Miss +Flamm thought that mebby the dog might ketch his weakness if the +nurse handled it right after she had been nursin' the baby. And +then she objected to the nurse, so I hearn, on account of her +bein' wet. She wanted to keep the dog dry. I hearn this; I +don't know as it wuz so. But I hearn these things long enough +before I ever see her. And when I did see her I see that they +didn't tell me no lies about her devotion to the dog, for she +jest worshiped it, that was plain to be seen. + +Wall, she has got a splendid place at Saratoga; a cottage she +calls it. I, myself, should call it a house, for it is big as +our house and Deacon Peddick'ses and Mr. Bobbett'ses all put +together, and I don't know but bigger. + +Wall, she invited Josiah and me to drive with her, and so her dog +and she stopped for us. (I put the dog first, for truly she +seemed to put him forward on every occasion in front of herself, +and so did her high-toned relatives, who wuz with her.) + +Or I s'pose they wuz her relatives for they sot up straight, and +wuz dretful dressed up, and acted awful big-feelin' and never +took no notice of Josiah and me, no more than if we hadn't been +there. But good land! I didn't care for that. What if they +didn't pay any attention to us? But Josiah, on account of his +tryin' to be so fashionable, felt it deeply, and he sez to me +while Miss Flamm wuz a bendin' down over the dog, a talkin' to +him, for truly it wuz tired completely out a barkin' at Josiah, +it had barked at him every single minute sense we had started, +and she wuz a talkin' earnest to it a tryin' to soothe it, and +Josiah whispered to me, "I'll tell you, Samantha, why them +fellers feel above me; it is because I haint dressed up in sech a +dressy fashion. Let me once have on a suit like their'n, white +legs and yellow trimmin's, and big shinin' buttons sot on in +rows, and white gloves, and rosettes in my hat -- why I could +appear in jest as good company as they go in." + +Sez I, "You are too old to be dressed up so gay, Josiah Allen. +There is a time for all things. Gay buttons and rosettes look +well with brown hair and sound teeth, but they ort to gently pass +away when they do. Don't talk any more about it, Josiah, for I +tell you plain, you are too old to dress like them, they are +young men." + +"Wall," he whispered, in deep resolve, "I will have a white +rosette in my hat, Samantha. I will go so far, old or not old. +What a sensation it will create in the Jonesville meetin'-house +to see me come a walkin' proudly in, with a white rosette in my +hat." + +"You are goin' to walk into meetin' with your hat on, are you?" +sez I coldly. + +"Oh, ketch a feller up. You know what I mean. And don't you +think I'll make a show? Won't it create a sensation in +Jonesville?" + +Sez I: "Most probable it would. But you haint a goin' to wear no +bows on your hat at your age, not if I can break it up," sez I. + +He looked almost black at me, and sez he, "Don't go too fur, +Samantha! I'll own you've been a good wife and mother and all +that, but there is a line that you must stop at. You mustn't go +too fur. There is some things in which a man must be footloose, +and that is in the matter of dress. I shall have a white rosette +on my hat, and some big white buttons up and down the back of my +overcoat! That is my aim, Samantha, and I shall reach it if I +walk through goar." + +He uttered them fearful words in a loud fierce whisper which made +the dog bark at him for more'n ten minutes stiddy, at the top of +its voice, and in quick short yelps. + +If it had been her young child that wuz yellin' at a visitor in +that way and ketchin' holt of him, and tearin' at his clothes, +the child would have been consigned to banishment out of the +room, and mebby punishment. But it wuzn't her babe and so it +remained, and it dug its feet down into the satin and laces and +beads of Miss Flamm's dress, and barked to that extent that we +couldn't hear ourselves think. + +And she called it "sweet little angel," and told it it might +"bark its little cunnin' bark." The idee of a angel barkin'; +jest think on't. And we endured it as best we could with shakin' +nerves and achin' earpans. + +It wuz a curius time. The dog harrowin' our nerve, and snappin' +at Josiah anon, if not oftener, and ketchin' holt of him +anywhere, and she a callin' it a angel; and Josiah a lookin' so +voyalent at it, that it seemed almost as if that glance could +stun it. + +It wuz a curius seen. But truly worse wuz to come, for Miss +Flamm in an interval of silence, sez, "We will go first to the +Gizer Spring, and then, afterwards, to the Moon." + +Or, that is what I understand her to say. And though I kep' +still, I wuz determined to keep my eyes out, and if I see her +goin' into anything dangerus, I wuz goin' to reject her overtures +to take us. But thinkses I to myself, "We always said I believed +we should travel to the stars some time, but I little thought it +would be to-day, or that I should go in a buggy." + +Josiah shared my feelin's I could see, for he whispered to me, +"Don't le's go, Samantha, it must be dangerus!" + +But I whispered back, "Le's wait, Josiah, and see. We won't do +nothin' percipitate, but," sez I, "this is a chance that we most +probable never will have ag'in. Don't le's be hasty." We talked +these things in secret, while Miss Flamm wuz a bendin' over, and +conversin' with the dog. For Josiah would ruther have died than +not be s'pozed to be "Oh Fay," as Maggie would say, in everything +fashionable. And it has always been my way to wait and see, and +count 10, or even 20, before speakin'. + +And then Miss Flamin sez sunthin' about what beautiful fried +potatoes you could get there in the moon, and you could always +get them, any time you wanted 'em. + +And the very next time she went to kissin' the dog so voyalently +as not to notice us, my Josiah whispered to me and sez, "Did you +have any idee that wuz what the old man wuz a doin'? I knew he +wuz always a settin' up there in the moon, but it never passed my +mind that he wuz a fryin' potatoes." + +But I sez, "Keep still, Josiah. It is a deep subject, a great +undertakin', and it requires caution and deliberation." + +But he sez,"I haint a goin', Samantha! Nor I haint a goin' to +let you go. It is dangerus." + +But I kinder nudged him, for she had the dog down on her lap, and +was ready to resoom conversation. And about that time we got to +the entrance of the spring, and one of her relatives got down and +opened the carriage door. + +I wondered ag'in that she didn't introduce us. But I didn't care +if she didn't. I felt that I wuz jest as good as they wuz, if +they wuz so haughty. But Josiah wantin' to make himself +agreeable to 'em (he hankers after gettin' into high society), he +took off his hat and bowed low to 'em, before he got out, and sez +he, "I am proud to know you, sir," and tried to shake hands with +him. But the man rejected his overtoors and looked perfectly +wooden, and oninterested. A big-feelin', high-headed creeter. +Josiah Allen is as good as he is any day. And I whispered to him +and sez, "Don't demean yourself by tryin' to force your company +onto them any more." + +"Wall," he whispered back, "I do love to move in high circles." + +Sez I, "Then I shouldn't think you would be so afraid of the +undertakin' ahead on us. If neighborin' with the old man in the +moon, and eatin' supper with him, haint movin' in high circles, +then I don't know what is." + +"But I don't want to go into anything dangerus," sez he. + +But jest then Miss Flamm.spoke to me, and I moved forward by her +side and into a middlin' big room, and in the middle wuz a great +sort of a well like, with the water a bubblin' up into a clear +crystal globe, and a sprayin' up out of it, in a slender misty +sparklin' spray. It wuz a pretty sight. And we drinked a glass +full of it a piece, and then we wandered out of the back +door-way, and went down into the pretty; old-fashioned garden +back of the house. + +Josiah and me and Miss Flamm went. The dog and the two relatives +didn't seem to want to go. The relatives sot up there straight +as two sticks, one of 'em holdin' the dog, and they didn't even +look round at us. + +"Felt too big to go with us," sez Josiah, bitterly, as we went +down the steps. "They won't associate with me." + +"Wall, I wouldn't care if I wuz in your place, Josiah Allen," sez +I, "you are jest as good as they be, and I know it." + +"You couldn't make 'em think so, dumb 'em," sez he. + +I liked the looks of it down there. It seems sometimes as if +Happiness gets kinder homesick, in the big dusty fashionable +places, and so goes back to the wild, green wood, and kinder +wanders off, and loafs round, amongst the pine trees, and cool +sparklin' brooks and wild flowers and long shinin' grasses and +slate stuns, and etc., etc. + +I don't believe she likes it half so well up in the big hotel +gardens or Courtin' yards, as she does down there. You see it +seems as if Happiness would have to be more dressed up, up there, +and girted down, and stiff actin', and on her good behavior, and +afraid of actin' or lookin' onfashionable. But down here by the +side of the quiet little brook, amongst the cool, green grasses, +fur away from diamonds, and satins, and big words, and dogs, and +parasols, and so many, many that are a chasin' of her and a +follerin' of her up, it seemed more as if she loved to get away +from it all, and get where she could take her crown off, lay down +her septer, onhook her corset, and put on a long loose gown, and +lounge round and enjoy herself (metafor). + +We had a happy time there. We went over the little rustick +bridges which would have been spilte in my eyes if they had been +rounded off on the edges, or a mite of paint on 'em. Truly, I +felt that I had seen enough of paint and gildin' to last me +through a long life, and it did seem such a treat to me to see a +board ag'in, jest a plain rough bass-wood board, and some stuns a +lyin' in the road, and some deep tall grass that you had to sort +a wade through. + +Miss Flamm seemed to enjoy it some down there, though she spoke +of the dog, which she had left up with her relatives. + +"3 big-feelin' ones together," I whispered to Josiah. + +And he sez, "Yes, that dog is a big-feelin' little cuss-tomer. +And if I wuz a chipmunk he couldn't bark at me no more than he +duz." + +And I looked severe at Josiah and sez I, "If you don't jine your +syllables closer together you will see trouble, Josiah Allen. +You'll find yourself swearin' before you know it." + +"Oh shaw, sez he, "customer haint a swearin' word; ministers use +it. I've hearn 'em many a time." + +"Yes," sez I, "but they don't draw it out as you did, Josiah +Allen." + +"Oh! wall! Folks can't always speak up pert and quick when they +are off on pleasure exertions and have been barked at as long as +I have been. But now I've got a minutes chance," sez he, "let me +tell you ag'in, don't you make no arraingments to go to the Moon. +It is dangerus, and I won't go myself, nor let you go." + +"Let," sez I to myself. "That is rather of a gaulin' word to me. +Won't let me go." But then I thought ag'in, and thought how love +and tenderness wuz a dictatin' the term, and I thought to myself, +it has a good sound to me, I like the word. I love to hear him +say he won't let me go. + +And truly to me it looked hazerdus. But Miss Flamm seemed ready +to go on, and onwillin'ly I followed on after her footsteps. But +I looked 'round, and said "Good-bye" in my heart, to the fine +trees, and cleer, brown waters of the brook, the grass, and the +wild flowers, and the sweet peace that wuz over all. + +"Good-bye," sez I. "If I don't see you ag'in, you'll find some +other lover that will appreciate you, though I am fur away." + +They didn't answer me back, none on 'em, but I felt that they +understood me. The pines whispered sunthin' to each other, and +the brook put its moist lips up to the pebbly shore and whispered +sunthin' to the grasses that bent down to hear it. I don't know +exactly what it wuz, but it wuz sunthin' friendly I know, for I +felt it speak right through the soft, summer sunshine into my +heart. They couldn't exactly tell what they felt towards me, and +I couldn't exactly tell what I felt towards them, yet we +understood each other; curi'us, haint it? + +Wall, we got into the carriage ag'in, one of her relatives +gettin' down to open the door. They knew what good manners is; +I'll say that for 'em. And Miss Flamm took her dog into her arms +seemin'ly glad to get holt of him ag'in, and kissed it several +times with a deep love and devotedness. She takes good care of +that dog. And what makes it harder for her to handle him is, her +dress is so tight, and her sleeves. I s'pose that is why she +can't breathe any better, and what makes her face and hands red, +and kinder swelled up. She can't get her hands to her head to +save her, and if a assassin should strike her, she couldn't raise +her arm to ward off the blow if he killed her. I s'pose it +worrys her. + +And she has to put her bunnet on jest as quick as she gets her +petticoats on, for she can't lift he arms to save her life after +she gets her corsets on. She owned up to me once that it made +her feel queer to be a walkin' 'round her room with not much on +only her bunnet all trimmed off with high feathers and artificial +flowers. + +But she said she wuz willing to do anythin' necessary, and she +felt that she must have her waist taper, no matter what stood in +the way on't. She loves the looks of a waist that tapers. That +wuz all the fault she found with the Goddus of Liberty +enlightenin' the world in New York Harber. We got to talkin' +about it and she said, "If that Goddus only had corsets on, and +sleeves that wuz skin tight, and her overskirt looped back over a +bustle, it would be perfect!" + +But I told her I liked her looks as well ag'in as she wuz. "Why," +sez I, "How could she lift her torch above her head? And how could +she ever enlighten the world, if she wuz so held down by her corsets +and sleeves that she couldn't wave her torch?" + +She see in a minute that it couldn't be done. She owned up that +she couldn't enlighten the world in that condition, but as fur as +looks went, it would be perfectly beautiful. + +But I don't think so at all. But, as I say, Miss Flamm has a +real hard time on't, all bard down as she is, and takin' all the +care of that dog, day and night. She is jest devoted to it. + +Why jest before we started a little lame girl with a shabby +dress, but a face angel sweet, came to the side of the carriage +to sell some water lilies. Her face looked patient, and wistful, +and she jest held out her flowers silently, and stood with her +bare feet on the wet ground and her pretty eyes lookin' pitifully +into our'n. She wanted to sell 'em awfully, I could see. And I +should have bought the hull of 'em immegitly, my feelin's was +sech, but onfortionably I had left my port-money in my other +pocket, and Josiah said he had left his (mebby he had). But Miss +Flamm would have bought 'em in a minute, I knew, the child's face +looked so mournful and appealin'; she would have bought 'em, but +she wuz so engrossed by the dog; she wuz a holdin' him up in +front of her a admirin' and carressin' of him, so's she never +ketched sight of the lame child. + +No body, not the best natured creeter in the world, can see +through a dog when it is held clost up to the eye, closer than +anything else. + +Wall, we drove down to what they called Vichy Spring and there on +a pretty pond clost to the springhouse, we see a boat with a +bycycle on it, and a boy a ridin' it. The boat wuz rigged out to +look like a swan with its wings a comin' up each side of the boy. +And down on the water, a sailin' along closely and silently wuz +another swan, a shadow swan, a follerin' it right along. It wuz +a fair seen. + +And Josiah sez to me, "He should ride that boat before he left +Saratoga; he said that wuz a undertakin' that a man might be +proud to accomplish." + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen, don't you do anything of the kind." + +"I MUST, Samantha," sez he. And then he got all animated about +fixin' up a boat like it at home. Sez he, "Don't you think it +would be splendid to have one on the canal jest beyond the +orchard?" And sez he, "Mebby, bein' on a farm, it would be more +appropriate to have a big goose sculptured out on it; don't you +think so?" + +Sez I, "Yes, it would be fur more appropriate, and a goose a +ridin' on it. But," sez I, "you will never go into that +undertakin' with my consent, Josiah Allen." + +"Why," sez he, "it would be a beautiful recreation; so uneek." + +But at that minute Miss Flamm gin the order to turn round and +start for the Moon, or that is how I understood her, and I +whispered to Josiah and sez, "She means to go in the buggy, for +the land's sake!" + +And Josiah sez, "Wall, I haint a goin' and you haint. I won't +let you go into anythin' so dangerus. She will probably drive +into a baloon before long, and go up in that way, but jest before +she drives in, you and I will get out, Samantha, if we have to +walk back." + +"I never heard of anybody goin' up in a baloon with two horses +and a buggy," sez I. + +"Wall, new things are a happenin' all the time, Samantha. And I +heard a feller a talkin' about it yesterday. You know they are a +havin' the big political convention here, and he said, (he wuz a +real cute chap too,) he said, 'if the wind wasted in that +convention could be utilized by pipes goin' up out of the ruff of +that buildin' where it is held,' he said, 'it would take a man up +to the moon.' I heerd him say it. And now, who knows but they +have got it all fixed. There wuz dretful windy speeches there +this mornin'. I hearn 'em, and I'll bet that is her idee, of +bein' the first one to try it; she is so fashionable. But I +haint a goin' up in no sech a way." + +"No," sez I. "Nor I nuther. It would be fur from my wishes to +be carried up to the skies on the wind of a political convention. +"Though," sez I reasonably, "I haint a doubt that there wuz +sights, and sights of it used there." + +But jest at this minute Miss Flamm got through talkin' with her +relatives about the road, and settled down to caressin' the dog +ag'in, and Josiah hadn't time to remark any further, only to say, +"Watch me, Samantha, and when I say jump, jump." + +And then we sot still but watchful. And Miss Flamm kissed the +dog several times and pressed him to her heart that throbbed full +of such a boundless love for him. And he lifted his head and +snapped at a fly, and barked at my companion with a renewed energy, +and showed his intellect and delightful qualities in sech remarkable +ways, that filled Miss Flamm's soul deep with a proud joy in him. +And then he went to sleep a layin, down in her lap, a mashin' down +the delicate lace and embroidery and beads. He had been a eating +the beads, I see him gnaw off more than two dozen of 'em, and I +called her attention to it, but she said, "The dear little darlin' +had to have some such recreation." And she let him go on with it, +a mowin' 'em down, as long as he seemed to have a appetite for 'em. +And ag'in she called him "angel." The idee of a angel a gnawin' +off beads and a yelpin'! + +And I asked her, and I couldn't help it. How her baby wuz that +afternoon, and if she ever took it out to drive? + +And she said she didn't really know how it wuz this afternoon; it +wuzn't very well in the mornin'. The nurse had it out somewhere, +she didn't really know just where. And she said, no, she didn't +take it out with her at all -- fur she didn't feel equal to the +care of it, in this hot weather. + +Miss Flamm haint very well I could see that. The care of that +dog is jest a killin' her, a carryin' it round with her all the +time daytimes, and a bein' up with it so much nights. She said +it had a dretful chill the night before, and she had to get up to +warm blankets to put round it; "its nerves wuz so weak," she +said, "and it wuz so sensative that she could not trust it to a +nurse." She has a hard time of it; there haint a doubt of it. + +Wall, it wuz anon, or jest about anon, that Miss Flamm turned to +me and sez, "Moon's is one of the pleasantest places on the lake. +I want you to see it; folks drive out there a sight from +Saratoga." + +And then I looked at Josiah, and Josiah looked at me, and peace +and happiness settled down ag'in onto our hearts. + +Wall, we got there considerably before anon and we found that +Moon's insted of bein' up in another planet wuz a big, long sort +a low buildin' settled right down onto this old earth, with a +immense piazza stretchin' along the side on't. + +And Miss Flamm and Josiah and me disembarked from the carriage +right onto the end of it. But the dog and her relatives stayed +back in the buggy and Josiah spoke bitterly to me ag'in but low, +"They think it would hurt 'em to associate with me a little, dumb +'m; but I am jest as good as they be any day of the week, if I +haint dressed up so fancy." + +"That's so," sez I, whisperin' back to him, "and don't let it +worry you a mite. Don't try to act like Haman," sez I. "You are +havin' lots of the good things of this world, and are goin' to +have some fried potatoes. Don't let them two Mordecais at the +gate, poison all your happiness, or you may get come up with jest +as Haman wuz." + +"I'd love to hang'em," sez he, "as high as Haman's gallows would +let 'em hang." + +"Why," sez I, "they haint injured you in any way. They seem to +eat like perfect gentlemen. A little too exclusive and +aristocratic, mebby, but they haint done nothin' to you." + +"No," sez he, "that is the stick on it, here we be, three men +with a lot of wimmen. And they can't associate with me as man +with man, but set off by themselves too dumb proud to say a word +to me, that is the dumb of it." + +But at this very minute, before I could rebuke him for his +feerful profanity, Miss Flamm motioned to us to come and take a +seat round a little table, and consequently we sot. + +It was a long broad piazza with sights and sights of folks on +it a settin' round little tables like our'n, and all a lookin' +happy, and a laughin', and a talkin' and a drinkin' different +drinks, sech as lemonade, etc., and eatin' fried potatoes and +sech. + +And out in the road by which we had come, wuz sights and sights +of vehicles and conveyances of all kinds from big Tally Ho +coaches with four horses on 'em, down to a little two wheeled +buggy. The road wuz full on'em. + +In front of us, down at the bottom of a steep though beautiful +hill, lay stretched out the clear blue waters of the lake. +Smooth and tranquil it looked in the light of that pleasant +afternoon, and fur off, over the shinin' waves, lay the island. +And white-sailed boats wuz a sailin' slowly by, and the shadow of +their white sails lay down in the water a floatin' on by the side +of the boats, lookin' some like the wings of that white dove that +used to watch over Lake Saratoga. + +And as I looked down on the peaceful seen, the feelin's I had +down in the wild wood, back of the Gizer Spring come back to me. +The waves rolled in softly from fur off, fur off, bringin' a +greetin' to me unbeknown to anybody, unbeknown to me. It come +into my heart unbidden, unsought, from afur, afur. + +Where did it come from that news of lands more beautiful than +any that lay round Mr. Moons'es, beautiful as it wuz. + +Echoes of music sweeter fur than wuz a soundin' from the band +down by the shore, music heard by some finer sense than heard +that, heavenly sweet, heavenly sad, throbbin' through the +remoteness of that country, through the nearness of it, and +fillin' my eyes with tears. Not sad tears, not happy ones, but +tears that come only to them that shet their eyes and behold the +country, and love it. The waves softly lappin' the shore brought +a message to me; my soul hearn it. Who sent it? And where, and +when, and why? + +Not a trace of these emotions could be read on my countenance as +I sot there calmly a eatin' fried potatoes. And they did go +beyond anything I ever see in the line of potatoes, and I thought +I could fry potatoes with any one: Yes, such wuz my feelin's when +I sot out for Mr. Moons'es. But I went back a thinkin' that +potatoes had never been fried by me, sech is the power of a grand +achievment over a inferior one, and so easy is the sails taken +down out of the swellin' barge of egotism. + +No, them potatoes you could carry in your pocket for weeks right +by the side of the finest lace, and the lace would be improved by +the purity of 'em. Fried potatoes in that condition, you could +eat 'em with the lightest silk gloves one and the tips of the +fingers would be improved by 'em; fried potatoes, jest think +on't! + +Wall, we had some lemonade too, and if you'll believe it, -- I +don't s'pose you will but it is the truth, -- there wuz straws in +them glasses too. But you may as well believe it for I tell the +truth at all times, and if I wuz a goin' to lie, I wouldn't lie +about lemons. And then I've always noticed it, that if things +git to happenin' to you, lots of things jest like it will happen. +That made twice in one week or so, that I had found straws in my +tumbler. But then I have had company three days a runnin', rainy +days too sometimes. It haint nothin' to wonder at too much. Any +way it is the truth. + +Wall, we drinked our lemonade, I a quietly takin' out the straws +and droppin' 'em on the floor at my side in a quiet ladylike +manner, and Josiah, a bein' wunk at by me, doin' the same thing. + +And anon, our carriage drove up to the end of the piazza agin and +we sot sail homewards. And the dog barked at Josiah almost every +step of the way back, and when we got to our boardin' place, Miss +Flamm shook hands with us both, and her relatives never took a +mite of notice of us, further than to jump down and open the +carriage door for us as we got out. (They are genteel in their +manners, and Josiah had to admit that they wuz, much as his +feelin's wuz hurt by their haughtiness towards him.) + +And then the dog, and Miss Flamm and Miss Flamm's relatives drove +off. + + + + +XI. + +VISIT TO THE INDIAN ENCAMPMENT. + +It wuz a fair sunshiny mornin' (and it duz seem to me that the +fairness of a Saratoga mornin' seems fairer, and the sunshine +more sunshiny than it duz anywhere else), that Josiah and Ardelia +and me sot sail for the Indian Encampment, which wuz encamped on +a little rise of ground to the eastward of where we wuz. + +Ardelia wuz to come to our boardin' place at halfpast 9 A. M., +forenoon, and we wuz to set out together from there. And +punctual to the very half minute I wuz down on the piazza, with +my mantilly hung over my arm and my umberel in my left hand. +Josiah Allen was on the right side on me. And as Ardelia hadn't +come yet we sot down in a middlin' quiet part of the piazza, and +waited for her. And as we sot there, I sez to Josiah, as I +looked out on the fair pleasant mornin' and the fair pleasant +faces environin' of us round, sez I, "Saratoga is a +good-natured place, haint it, Josiah?" + +And he said (I mistrust his corns ached worse than common, or +sunthin'), he said, he didn't see as it wuz any better-natured +than Jonesville or Loontown. + +And I sez, "Yes it is, Josiah Allen." Sez I, folks are happier +here and more generous, the rich ones seem inclined to help them +that need help to a little comfort and happiness. Jest as I have +always said, Josiah Allen. When folks are happy, they are more +inclined to do good." + +"Oh shaw!" sez Josiah. "That never made no difference with me." + +"What didn't?" sez I. + +"I'm always good," sez he, and he snapped out the words real +snappish, and loud. + +And I sez mildly, "Wall, you needn't bring the ruff down to prove +your goodness." + +And he went on: "I don't see as they are so pesky good here; I +haint seen nothin' of it." + +"Wall," sez I, "when I look over Yaddo, and Hilton Park, it makes +me reconciled, Josiah, to have men get rich; it makes me willin', +Josiah." + +And he sez (cross), He guessed men would get rich whether I wuz +willin' or not; he guessed they wouldn't ask me. + +"Wall, you needn't snap my head off, Josiah Allen," sez I, +"because I love to see folks use their wealth to make pleasant +places for poor folks to wander round in, and forget their own +narrow rocky roads for a spell. It is a noble thing to do, +Josiah Allen; they might have built high walls round 'em if they +had been a mind to, and locked the gates and shet out all the +poor and tired-out ones, But they didn't, and I am highly tickled +at the thought on't, Josiah Allen." + +"Wall, I don't shet up our sugar lot, do I? and I have never +heerd you say one word a praisin' me up for that." + +"That is far different, Josiah Allen," sez I, "there is nothin' +there that can git hurt, only stumps. And you have never laid +out a cent of money on it. And they have spent thousands and +thousands of dollars; and the poorest little child in Saratoga, +if it has beauty-lovin' eyes, can go in and enjoy these places +jest as much as the owners can. And it is a sweet thought to me, +Josiah Allen." + +"Oh wall," sez he, "you have probable said enough about it." + +Now I never care for the last word, some wimmen do, but I never +do. But still I wuzn't goih' to be shet right eff from talkin' +about these places, and I intimated as much to him, and he said, +"Dumb it all! I could talk about 'em all day, if I wanted to, +and about Demorist's Woods too." + +"Wall," sez I, "that is another place, Josiah Allen, that is a +likely well-meanin' spot. Middlin' curius to look at," sez I, +reesonably. "It makes one's head feel sort a strange to see them +criss-cross, curius poles, and floors up in trees, and ladders, +and teterin' boards, and springs, etc., etc., etc. But it is a +well-meanin' spot, Josiah Allen. And it highly tickled me to +think that the little fresh air children wuz brung up there by +the owner of the woods and the poor little creeters, out of their +dingy dirty homes, and filthy air, wandered round for one happy +day in the green woods, in the fresh air and sunshine. That wuz +a likely thing to do, Josiah Allen, and it raises a man more in +my estimation when he's doin' sech things as that, than to set up +in a political high chair, and have a lot of dirty hands clapped, +and beery breaths a cheerin' him on up the political arena." + +"Oh wall," sez Josiah, "the doin's in them woods is enough to +make anybody a dumb lunatick. The crazyest lookin' lot of stuff +I ever set eyes on." + +"Wall, anyway," sez I, "it is a good crazy, if it is, and a +well-meanin' one." + +"Oh, how cross Josiah Allen did look as he heered me say these +words. That man can't bear to hear me say one word a praisin' up +another man, and it grows on him. + +But good land! I am a goin' to speak out my mind as long as my +breath is spared. And I said quite a number of words more about +the deep enjoyment it gin' me to see these broad, pleasure +grounds free for all, rich and poor, bond and free, hombly and +handsome, etc., etc. + +And I spoke about the charitable houses, St. Christiana's home, +and the Home for Old Female Wimmen, and mentioned the fact in +warm tones of how a good, noble-hearted woman had started that +charity in the first on't. + +And Josiah, while I wuz talkin' about these wimmen, became meak +as a lamb. They seemed to quiet him. He looked real mollyfied +by the time Ardelia got there, which wuz anon. And then we sot +sail for the Encampment. + +The Encampment is encamped on one end of a big, square, +wild-lookin' lot right back of one of the biggest tarvens in +Saratoga. It is jest as wild lookin' and appeerin' a field as +there is in the outskirts of Loontown or Jonesville. Why Uncle +Grant Hozzleton's stunny pasture don't look no more sort a broke +up and rural than that duz. I wondered some why they had it +there, and then I thought mebby they kep' it to remember Nater +by, old Nater herself, that runs a pretty small chance to be +thought on in sech a place as this. + +You know there is so much orniment and gildin' and art in the +landscape and folks, that mebby they might forget the great +mother of us all, that is, right in the thickest of the crowd +they might, but they have only to take these few steps and they +will see Ma Nater with her every-day dress on, not fixed up a +mite. And I s'pose she looks good to 'em. + +I myself think that Mother Nater might smooth herself out a +little there with no hurt to herself or her children. I don't +believe in Mas goin' round with their dresses onhooked, and +slip-shod, and their hair all stragglin' out of their combs. (I +say this in metafor. I don't spose Ma Nater ever wore a back +comb or had hooks and eyes on her gown; I say it for oritory, and +would wish to be took in a oritorius way. + +And I don't say right out, that the reeson I have named is the +one why they keep that place a lookin' so like furey, I said, +MEBBY. But I will say this, that it is a wild-lookin' spot, and +hombly. + +Wall, on the upper end on't, standin' up on the top of a sort of +a hill, the Indian Encampment is encamped. There is a hull row +of little stores, and there is swings, and public diversions of +different kinds, krokay grounds, etc., etc., etc. + +Wall, Ardelia stopped at one of these stores kep' by a Injun, not +a West, but a East one, and began to price some wooden bracelets, +and try 'em on, and Josiah and me wandered on. + +And anon, we came to a tent with some good verses of Scripter on +it; good solid Bible it wuz; and so I see it wuz a good creeter +in there anyway. And I asked a bystander a standin' by, Who wuz +in there, and Why, and When? + +And he said it wuz a fortune-teller who would look in the pamm of +my hand, and tell me all my fortune that wuz a passin' by. And I +said I guessed I would go in, for I would love to know how the +children wuz that mornin' and whether the baby had got over her +cold. I hadn't heerd from 'em in over two days. + +Josiah kinder hung 'round outside though he wuz willin' to have +me go in. He jest worships the children and the baby. And he +sees the texts from Job on it, with his own eyes. + +So I bid him a affectionate farewell, and we see the woman a +lookin' out of the tent and witnessin' on't. But I didn't care. +If a pair of companions and a pair of grandparents can't act +affectionate, who can? And the world and the Social Science +meetin' might try in vain to bring up any reeson why they +shouldn't. + +So I went in, with my mind all took up with the grandchildern. +But the first words she sez to me wuz, as she looked close at the +pamm of my hand, "Keep up good spirits, Mom; you will get him in +spite of all opposition." + +"Get who?" sez I, "And what?" + +"A man you want to marry. A small baldheaded man, a amiable-lookin', +slender man. His heart is sot on you. And all the efferts of the +light-complected woman in the blue hat will be in vain to break it +up. Keep up good courage, you will marry him in spite of all," sez +she, porin' over my pamm and studyin' it as if it wuz a jography. + +"For the land's sake!" sez I, bein' fairly stunted with the idees +she promulgated. + +"Yes, you will marry him, and be happy. But you have had a +sickness in the past and your line of happiness has been broken +once or twice." + +Sez I, "I should think as much; let a woman live with a man, the +best man in the world for 20 years, and if her line of happiness +haint broke more than once or twice, why it speaks well for the +line, that is all. It is a good, strong line." + +"Then you have been married?" says she. + +"Yes, Mom," sez I. + +"Oh, I see, down in the corner of your hand is a coffin, you are +a widow, you have seen trouble. But you will be happy. The +mild, bald gentleman will make you happy. He will lead you to +the altar in spite of the light-complected woman with the blue +bat on." + +Ardelia Tutt had on a blue hat, the idee! But I let her go on. +Thinkses I, "I have paid my money and now it stands me in hand to +get the worth on't." So she comferted me up with the hope of +gettin' my Josiah for quite a spell. + +Gettin' my pardner! Gettin' the father of my childern, and the +grandparent of my grandchildren! Jest think on't, will you? + +But then she branched off and told me things that wuz truly +wonderful. Where and how she got 'em wuz and is a mistery to me. +True things, and strange. + +Why it seemed same as if them tall pines, that wuz a whisperin' +together over the Encampment wuz a peerin' over into my past, and +a whisperin' it down to her. Or, in some way or other, the truth +wuz a bein' filtered down to her comprehension through some +avenue beyond our sense or sight. + +It is a curious thing, so I think, and so Josiah thinks. We +talked it over after I came out, and we wuz a wanderin' on about +the Encampment. I told him some of the wonderful things she had +told me and he didn't believe it. "For," sez he, "I'll be hanged +if I can understand and I won't believe anything that I can't +understand!" + +And I pointed with the top of my umberel at a weed growin' by the +side of the road, and sez I, "When you tell me jest how that weed +draws out of the back ground jest the ingredients she needs to +make her blue foretop, and her green gown, then I'll tell you all +about this secret that Nater holds back from us a spell, but will +reveel to us when the time comes." + +"Oh shave!" sez Josiah, "I guess I know all about a jimson weed. +Why they groin; that is all there is about them. They grow, dumb +'em. I guess if you'd broke your back as many times as I have a +pullin' 'em up, yon would know all about' em. Dumb their dumb +picters," sez he, a scowlin' at 'em. + +It wuz the same kind of weed that growed in our onion beds. I +recognized it. Them and white daisies, our garden wuz overrun by +'em both. + +But I sez, "Can you tell how the little seed of this weed goes +down into the earth and selects jest what she wants out of the +great storehouse below? She never comes out in a pink head-dress +or a yellow gown. No, she always selects what will make the blue. +It shows that it has life, intelligence, or else it couldn't think, +way down under the ground, and grope in the dark, but always +gropin' jest right, always a thinkin' the right thing, never, never +in the hundreds and thousands of years makin' a mistake. Why, you +couldn't do it, Josiah Allen, nor I couldn't. + +"And we set and see these silent mysteries a goin' on right at +our door-step day by day, and year by year, and think nothin' of +it, because it is so common. But if anything else, some new law, +some new wonder we don't understand comes in our way, we are +ready to reject it and say it is a lie. But you know, Josiah +Allen," sez I, jest ready to go on eloquent - + +But I wuz interrupted jest here by my companion hollerin' up in a +loud voice to a boy, "Here! you stop that, you young scamp! Don't +you let me see you a doin' that agin!" + +Sez I, "What is it, Josiah Allen?" + +"Why look at them young imps, a throwin' sticks at that feeble +old woman, over there." + +I looked, and my own heart wuz rousted up with indignation. I +stood where I couldn't see her face, but I see she wuz old, +feeble, and bent, a withered poor old creeter, and they had +marked up over her, her name, Aunt Sally. + +I too wuz burnin' indignant to see a lot of young creeters a +throwin' sticks at her, and I cried out loud, "Do you let Sarah +be." + +They turned round and laughed in our faces, and I went on: "I'd +be ashamed of myself if I wuz in your places to be a throwin' +sticks at that feeble old woman. Why don't you spend your +strengths a tryin' to do sunthin' for her? Git her a home, and +sunthin' to eat, and a better dress. Before I'd do what you are +a doin' now, I'd growvel in the dust. Why, if you wuz my boys +I'd give you as good a spankin' as you ever had." + +But they jest laughed at us, the impudent Greeters. And one of +the boys at that minute took up a stick and threw it, and hit +Sarah right on her poor old head. + +Sez Josiah, "Don't you hit Sarah agin." + +Sez the boys, "We will," and two of 'em hit her at one time. And +one of 'em knocked the pipe right out of her mouth. She wuz a +smokin', poor old creeter. I s'pose that wuz all the comfort she +took. But did them little imps care? They knocked her as if +they hated the sight of her. And my Josiah (I wuz proud of that +man) jest advanced onto 'em, and took 'em one in each hand, and +gin 'em sech a shakin', that I most expected to see their bones +drop out, and sez he between each shake, "Will you let Sarah +alone now?" + +I wuz proud of my Josiah, but fearful of the effect of so much +voyalence onto his constitution, and also onto the boys' frames. +And I advanced onto the seen of carnage and besought him to be +calm. Sez he, "I won't be calm!" sez he, "I haint the man, +Samantha, to stand by and see one of your sect throwed at, as I +have seen Sarah throwed at, without avengin' of it." + +And agin he shook them boys with a vehemence. The pennies and +marbles in their pockets rattled and their bones seemed ready to +part asunder. I wuz proud of that noble man, my pardner. But +still I knew that if their bones was shattered my pardner would +be avenged upon by incensed parents. And I sez, "I'd let 'em go +now, Josiah. I don't believe they'll ever harm Sarah agin." Sez +I, "Boys, you won't, will you ever strike a poor feeble old woman +agin?." Sez I, "promise me, boys, not to hurt Sarah." + +I don't know what the effect of my words would have been, but a +man came up just then and explained to me, that Aunt Sally wuz a +image that they throwed at for one cent apiece to see if they +could break her pipe. + +I see how it wuz, and cooled right down, and so did Josiah. And +he gin the boys five cents apiece, and quiet rained down on the +Encampment. + +But I sez to the man, "I don't like the idee of havin' my sect +throwed at from day to day, and week to week." Sez I, "Why didn't +you have a man fixed up to throw at, why didn't you have a Uncle +Sam?" Sez I, "I don't over and above like it; it seems to be a +sort of a slight onto my sect." + +Sez the man winkin' kind a sly at Josiah, "It won't do to make +fun of men, men have the power in their hands and would resent it +mebby. Uncle Sam can't be used jest like Aunt Sally." + +Sez I, "That haint the right spirit. There haint nothin' over +and above noble in that, and manly." + +I wuz kinder rousted up about it, and so wuz Josiah. And that is +I s'pose the reasun of his bein' so voyalent, at the next place +of recreation we halted at Josiah see the picture of the mermaid; +that beautiful female, a, settin' on the rock and combin' her +long golden hair. And he proposed that we should go in and see +it. + +Sez I, "It costs ten cents apiece, Josiah Allen. Think of the +cost before it is too late." Sez I, "Your expenditure of money +today has been unusial." Sez I, "The sum of ten cents has jest +been raised by you for noble principles, and I honer you for it. +But still the money has gone." Sez I, "Do you feel able to incur +the entire expense?" + +Sez he, "All my life, Samantha, I have jest hankered after seein' +a mermaid. Them beautiful creeters, a settin' and combin' their +long golden tresses. I feel that I must see it. I fairly long +to see one of them beautiful, lovely bein's before I die." + +"Wall," sez I, "if you feel like that, Josiah Allen, it is not +fur from me to balk you in your search for beauty. I too admire +loveliness, Josiah Allen, and seek after it." And sez I, "I will +faithfully follow at your side, and together we will bask in the +rays of beauty, together will we be lifted up and inspired by the +immortal spirit of loveliness." + +So payin' our 30 cents we advanced up the steps, I expectin' soon +to be made happy, and Josiah held up by the expectation of soon +havin' his eyes blest by that vision of enchantin' beauty, he had +so long dremp of. + +He advanced onto the pen first and before I even glanced down +into the deep where as I s'posed she set on a rock a combin' out +her long golden hair, a singin' her lurin' and enchanted song, to +distant mariners she had known, and to the one who wuz a showin' +of her off, before I had time to even glance at her, the maid, I +was dumbfounded and stood aghast, at the mighty change that came +over my pardner's linement. + +He towered up in grandeur and in wrath before me. He seemed +almost like a offended male fowl when ravenin' hawks are angerin' +of it beyond its strength to endure. I don't like that metafor; +I don't love to compare my pardner to any fowl, wild or tame; but +my frenzied haste to describe the fearful seen must be my excuse, +and also my agitation in recallin' of it. + +He towered up, he fluttered so to speak majestically, and he says +in loud wild axents that must have struck terror to the soul of +that mariner, "Where is the hair-comb?" + +And then he shook his fist in the face of that mariner, and cries +out once agin, "Where is them long golden tresses? Bring 'em on +this instant! Fetch on that hair-comb, in a minute's time, or +I'll prosecute you, and sue you, and take the law to you - !" + +The mariner quailed before him and sez I, "My dear pardner, be +calm! Be calm!" + +"I won't be calm!" + +Sez I mildly, but firmly, "You must, Josiah Allen; you must! or +you will break open your own chest. You must be calm." + +"And I tell you I won't be calm. And I tell you," says he, a +turnin' to that destracted mariner agin "I tell you to bring on +that comb and that long hair, this instant. Do you s'pose I'm +goin' to pay out my money to see that rack-a-bone that I wouldn't +have a layin' out in my barn-yard for fear of scerin' the dumb +scere-crows out in the lot. Do you s'pose I'm goin' to pay out +my money for seein' that dried-up mummy of the hombliest thing +ever made on earth, the dumbdest, hombliest; with 2 or 3 horse +hairs pasted onto its yellow old shell! Do you spose I'm goin' +to be cheated by seein' that, into thinkin' it is a beautiful +creeter a playin' and combin' her hair? Bring on that beautiful +creeter a combin' out her long, golden hair this instant, and +bring out the comb and I'll give you five minutes to do it in." + +He wuz hoorse with emotion, and he wuz pale round his lips as +anything and leis eyes under his forward looked glassy. I wuz +fearful of the result. + +Thinkses I, I will look and see what has wrecked my pardner's +happiness and almost reasen. I looked in and I see plain that +his agitation was nothin' to be wondered at. It did truly seem +to be the hombliest, frightfulest lookin' little thing that wuz +ever made by a benignant Providence or a taxy-dermis. I couldn't +tell which made it. I see it all, but I see also, so firm, sot +is my reasun onto its high throne on my heart, I see that to +preserve my pardner's sanity, I must control my reasun at the +sight that had tottered my pardner's. + +I turned to him, and tried to calm the seethin' waters, but he +loudly called for the comb, and for the tresses, and the lookin' +glass. And, askin' in a wild' sarcastic way where the song wuz +that she sung to mariners? And hollerin' for him to bring on +that rock at that minute, and them mariners, and ordered him to +set her to singin'. + +The idee! of that little skeletin with her skinny lips drawed +back from her shinin' fish teeth, a singin'. The idee on't! + +But truly, he wuz destracted and knew not what he did. The +mariner in charge looked destracted. And the bystanders a +standin' by wuz amazed, and horrowfied by the spectacle of his +actin' and behavin'. And I knew not how I should termonate the +seen, and withdraw him away from where he wuz. + +But in my destraction and agony of sole, I bethought me of one +meens of quietin' him and as it were terrifyin' him into silence +and be the meens of gettin' on him to leave the seen. I begoned +to Ardelia to come forward and I sez in a whisper to her, "Take +out your pencil and a piece of paper and stand up in front of him +and go to writin' some of your poetry," + +And then I sez agin in tender agents, "Be calm, Josiah." + +"And I tell you that I won't be calm! And I tell you," a shakin' +his fist at that pale mariner, "I tell you to bring out -- " + +At that very minute he turned his eyes onto Ardelia, who stood +with a kind of a fur-away look in her eyes in front of him with +the paper in her hand, and sez he to me, "What is she doin'?" + +"She is composin' some poetry onto you, Josiah Allen," sez I, in +tremblin' axents; for I felt that if that skeme failed, I wuz +undone, for I knew I had no ingredients there to get him a extra +good meal. No, I felt that my tried and true weepon wuz fur +away, and this wuz my last hope. + +But as I thought these thoughts with almost a heatlightnin' +rapidety, I see a change in his liniment. It did not look so +thick and dark; it began to look more natural and clear. + +And sez he in the same old way I have heerd him say it so many +times, "Dumb it all! What duz she want to write poetry on me +for? It is time to go home." And so sayin', he almost tore us +from the seen. + +I gin Ardelia that night 2 yards of lute-string ribbon, a light +pink, and didn't begrech it. But I have never dast, not in his +most placid and serene moments - I have never dast, to say the +word "Mermaid' to him. + +Truly there is something that the boldest female pardner dassent +do. Mermaids is one of the things I don' dast to bring up. No! +no, fur be it from me to say "Mermaid" to Josiah Allen. + + + + +XII. + +A DRIVE TO SARATOGA LAKE. + + +Josiah and me took a short drive this afternoon, he hirin' a +buggy for the occasion. He called it "goin' in his own conveniance," +and I didn't say nothin' aginst his callin' it so. I didn't break +it up for this reasun, thinkses I it is a conveniance for us to +ride in it, for us 2 tried and true souls to get off for a minute +by ourselves. + +Wall, Josiah wuz dretful good behaved this afternoon. He helped +me in a good deal politer than usual and tucked the bright +lap-robe almost tenderly round my form. + +Men do have sech spells. They are dretful good actin' at times. +Why they act better and more subdueder and mellerer at sometimes +than at others, is a deep subject which we mortals cannot as yet +fully understand. Also visey versey, their cross, up headeder +times, over bearin' and actin'. It is a deep subject and one +freighted with a great deal of freight. + +But Josiah's goodness on this afternoon almost reached the +Scripteral and he sez, when we first sot out, and I see that the +horse's head wuz turned towards the Lake. Sez he, "I guess we'll +go to the Lake, but where do you want to go, Samantha? I will go +anywhere you want to go." + +And he still drove almost recklessly on lakewards. And sez he, +"We had better go straight on, but say the word, and you can go +jest where you want to." And he urged the horse on to still +greater speed. And he sez agin, "Do you want to go any +particular place, Samantha?" + +"Yes," sez I, "I had jest as leves go there as not." + +"Wall, I knew there would be where you would want to go." And he +drove on at a good jog. But no better jog than we had been a +goin' on. + +Wall the weather wuz delightful. It wuz soft and balmy. And my +feelin's towered my pardner (owin' to his linement) wuz soft and +balmy as the air. And so we moved onwards, past the home of one +who wuz true to his country, when all round him wuz false, who +governed his state wisely and well, held the lines firm, when she +wuz balky, and would have been glad to take the lines in her +teeth and run away onto ruin; past the big grand house of him who +carried a piece of our American justice way off into Egypt and +carried it firm and square too right there in the dark. I s'pose +it is dark. I have always hearn about its bein' as dark as +Egypt. Wall, anyway he is a good lookin' man. They both on 'em +are and Josiah admitted it - after some words. + +Wall anon, or perhaps a little after, we came to where we could +see the face of Beautiful Saratoga Lake, layin' a smilin' up into +the skies. A little white cloud wuz a restin' up on the top of +the tree-covered mountain that riz up on one side of the lake, +and I felt that it might be the shadow form of the sacred dove +Saderrosseros a broodin' down over the waters she loved. + +That she loved still, though another race wuz a bathin' their +weary forwards in the tide. And I wondered as I looked down on +it, whether the great heart of the water wuz constant; if it ever +heaved up into deep sithes a thinkin' of the one who had passed +away, of them who once rested lightly on her bosem, bathed their +dark forwards and read the meanin' of the heavens, in the moon +and stars reflected there. + +I don't know as she remembered 'em, and Josiah don't. But I know +as we stood there, a lookin' down on her, the lake seemed to give +a sort of a sithe and a shiver kind a run over her, not a cold +shiver exactly, but a sort of a shinin', glorified shiver. I see +it a comin' from way out on the lake and it swept and sort a +shivered on clean to the shore and melted away there at our feet. +Mebby it wuz a sort o' sithe, and mebby agin it wuzn't. + +I guess it felt that it wuz all right, that a fairer race had +brought fairer customs and habits of thoughts, and the change wuz +not a bad one. I guess she looked forward to the time when a +still grander race should look down into her shinin' face, a race +of free men, and free wimmen; sons and daughters of God, who +should hold their birthright so grandly and nobly that they will +look back upon the people of to-day, as we look back upon the +dark sons and daughters of the forest, in pity and dolor. + +I guess she thought it wuz all right. Any way she acted as if +she did. She looked real sort o' serene and calm as we left her, +and sort o' prophetic too, and glowin'. + +Wall, we went by a long first rate lookin' sort of a tarven, I +guess. It wuz a kind of a dark red color, and dretfully flowered +off in wood - red wood. And there we see standin' near the +house, a great big round sort of a buildin', and my Josiah sez, + +"There! that is a buildin' I like the looks on. That is a barn I +like; built perfectly round. That is sunthin' uneek. I'll have +a barn like that if I live. I fairly love that barn." And he +stopped the horse stun still to look at it. + +And I sez in sort o' cool tones, not entirely cold, but coolish: +"What under the sun do you want with a round barn? And you don't +need another one." + +"Wall, I don't exactly need it, Samantha, but it would be a +comfert to me to own one. I should dearly love a round barn." + +And he went on pensively, - "I wonder how much it would cost. I +wouldn't have it quite so big as this is. I'd have it for a +horse barn, Samantha. It would look so fashionable, and genteel. +Think what it would be, Samantha, to keep our old mair in a round +barn, why the mair would renew her age." + +"She wouldn't pay no attention to it," sez I. "She knows too +much." And I added in cooler, more dignifieder tones, but dretful +meanin' ones, "The old mair, Josiah Allen, don't run after every +new fancy she hears on. She don't try to be fashionable, and she +haint high-headed, except," sez I, reasenably, "when you check her +up too much." + +"Wall," sez he, "I am bound to make some enquiries. Hello!" says +he to a bystander a comin' by. "Have you any idee what such a +barn as that would cost? A little smaller one, I don't need so +big a one. How many feet of lumber do you s'pose it would take +for it? I ask you," sez he, "as between man and man." + +I nudged him there, for as I have said, I didn't believe then, +and I don't believe now, that he or any other man ever knew or +mistrusted what they meant by that term "as between man and man." +I think it sounds kind o' flat, and I always oppose Josiah's +usin' it; he loves it. + +Wall, the man broke out a' laughin' and sez he, "That haint a +barn, that is a tree." + +"A tree!" sez I, a sort o' cranin' my neck forward in deep amaze. +And what exclamation Josiah Allen made, I will not be coaxed into +revealin'; no, it is better not. + +But suffice it to say that after a long explanation my companion +at last gin in that the man wuz a tellin' the truth, and it wuz +the lower part of a tree-trunk, that growed once near the Yo Semity +valley of California. Good land! good land! + +Josiah drove on quick after the man explained it, he felt +meachin', but I didn't notice his linement so much, I wuz so deep +in thought, and a wonderin' about it; a wonderin' how the old +tree felt with her feet a restin' here on strange soil - her +withered, dry old feet a standin' here, as if jest ready to walk +away restless like and feverish, a wantin' to get back by the +rushin' river that used to bathe them feet in the spring overflow +of the pure cold mountain water. It seemed to me she felt she +was a alien, as if she missed her strong sturdy grand old body, +her lofty head that used to peer up over the mountains, and as if +some day she wuz a goin' to set off a walkin' back, a tryin' to +find 'em. + +I thought of how it had towered up, how the sun had kissed its +branches, how the birds had sung and built their nests against +her green heart, hovered in her great, outstretched arms. The +birds of a century, the birds of a thousand years. How the +storms had beat upon her; the first autumn rains of a thousand +years, the first snow-flakes that had wavered down in a slantin' +line and touched the tips of her outstretched fingers, and then +had drifted about her till her heart wuz almost frozen and she +would clap her cold hands together to warm 'em, and wail out a +dretful moanin' sound of desolation, and pain. + +But the first warm rain drops of Spring would come, the sunshine +warmed her, she swung out her grand arms in triumph agin, and +joined the majestic psalm of victory and rejoicing with all her +grand sisterhood of psalmists. The stars looked down on her, the +sun lit her lofty forward, the suns and stars of a thousand +years. Strange animals, that mebby we don't know anything about +now, roamed about her feet, birds of a different plumage and song +sung to her (mebby). + +Strange faces of men and women looked up to her. What faces had +looked up to her in sorrow and in joy? I'd gin a good deal to +know. I'd have loved to see them strange faces touched with +strange pains and hopes. Tribulations and joys of a thousand +years ago. What sort of tribulations wuz they, and what sort of +joys? Sunthin' human, sunthin' that we hold in common, no doubt. +The same pain that pained Eve as she walked down out of Eden, the +same joy that Adam enjoyed while they and the garden wuz +prosperus, wuz in their faces most probable whether their +forwards wuz pinted or broad, their faces black, copper colored +or white. + +And the changes, the changes of a thousand years, all these the +old tree had seen, and I respected her dry dusty old feet and wuz +sorry for 'em. And I reveryed on the subject more'n half the way +home, and couldn't help it. Anyway my revery lasted till jest +before we got to the big gate of the Race Course. + +And right there, right in front of them big ornamental doors, we +see Miss G. Washington Flamm, with about a thousand other carriages +and wagons and Tally ho's and etcetry, and etcetry. Josiah thinks +there wuz a million teams, but I don't. I am mejum; there wuzn't +probable over a thousand right there in the road. + +Miss Flamm recognized us and asked us if we didn't want to go in. +Wall, Josiah wuz agreeable to the idee and said so. And then she +said sunthin' to the man that tended to the gate, probably +sunthin' in our praise, and handed him sunthin', it might have +been a ten cent piece, for all I know. + +But anyway he wuz dretful polite to us, and let us through. And +my land! if it wuzn't a sight to behold! Of all the big roomy +places I ever see all filled with vehicles of all shapes and +sizes and folks on foot and big high platforms, all filled with +men and wimmen and children! And Josiah sez to me, "I thought +the hull dumb world wuz there outside in the road, and here there +is ten times as many in here." + +And I sez, "Yes, Josiah, be careful and not lose me, for I feel +like a needle in a hay mow." + +He looked down on me and sort a smiled. I s'pose it wuz because +I compared myself to a needle, and he sez, "A cambric needle, or +a darnin' needle?" + +And I sez, "I wouldn't laugh in such a time as this, Josiah Allen." +Sez I, "Do jest look over there on the race course." + +And it wuz a thrillin' seen. It wuz a place big enough for all +the horses of our land to run 'round in and from Phario's horses +down to them of the present time. And beautiful broad smooth +roads cut in the green velvet of the grass, and horses goin' +'round jest like lightnin', with little light buggys hitched to +'em, some like the quiver on sheet lightnin' (only different +shape) and men a drivin' 'em. + +And then there wuz a broad beautiful race course with little +clusters of trees and bushes, every little while right in the +road, and if you'll believe it, I don't s'pose you will, but it +is the livin' truth, when them horses, goin' jest like a flash of +light, with little boys all dressed in gay colors a ridin' 'em -- +when them horses came to them trees instid of goin' 'round 'em, +or pushin' in between 'em, or goin' back agin, they jumped right +over 'em. I don't spose this will be believed by lots of folks +in Jonesville and Loontown, but it is the truth, for I see it +with both my eyes. Josiah riz right up in the buggy and cheered +jest as the rest of 'em did, entirely unbeknown to himself, so he +said, to see it a goin' on. + +Why he got nearly rampant with excitement. And so did I, though +I wouldn't want it known by Tirzah Ann's husband's folks and +others in Jonesville. They call it "steeple chasin'" so if they +should hear on't, it wouldn't sound so very wicked any way. I +should probable tell 'em if they said too much, "That it wuz a +pity if folks couldn't get interested in a steeple and chase it +up." But between you and me I didn't see no sign of a steeple, +nor meetin' house nor nuthin'. I s'pose they gin it that name to +make it seem more righter to perfessors. I know it wuz a great +comfort to me. (But I don't think they chased a steeple, and +Josiah don't, for we think we should have seen it if they had.) + +Wall, as I say, we wuz both dretfully interested, excited, and +wrought up, I s'pose I ort to say, when a chap accosted me and +says to me sunthin' about buyin' a pool. And I shook my head and +sez, "No, I don't want to buy no pool." + +But he kep' on a talkin' and a urgin', and sez, "Won't you buy a +French pool, mom, you can make lots of money out of it." + +"A pool," sez I in dignified axents, and some stern, for I wuz +weary with his importunities. "What do I want a pool for? Don't +you s'pose there's any pools in Jonesville, and I never thought +nothin' on 'em, I always preferred runnin' water. But if I wuz a +goin' to buy one, what under the sun do you s'pose I would buy +one way off here for, hundreds of miles from Jonesville?" + +"I might possibly," sez I, not wantin' to hurt his feelin's and +tryin' to think of some use I could put it tot " might if you had +a good small American pool, that wuz a sellin' cheap; and I could +have it set right in our back yard, clost to the horse barn, why +I might possibly try to make a dicker with you for it. I might +use it for raisin' ducks and geese, though I'd rather have a +runnin' stream then. But how under the sun you think I could +take a pool home on a tower, how I could pack it, or transport +it, or drive it home is a mystery to me." + +Again he sez mechinecally, "Lots of wimmen do get 'em." + +"Wall, some wimmen," sez I mildly, for I see he wuz a lookin' at +me perfect dumbfoundered. I see I wuz fairly stuntin' him with +my eloquence. "Some wimmen will buy anything if it has a French +name to it. But I prefer my own country, land or water. And +some wimmen," sez I, "will buy anything if they can get it cheap, +things they don't need, and would be better off without, from a +eliphant down to a magnificent nothin' to call husband. They'll +buy any worthless and troublesome thing jest to get 'em to goin'. +Now such wimmen would jest jump at that pool. But that haint my +way. No, I don't want to purchase your pool." + +Sez he, "You are mistaken, mom!" + +"No I haint," sez I firmly and with decesion. "No I haint. I +don't need no pool. It wouldn't do me no good to keep it on my +hands, and I haint no notion of settin' up in the pool or pond +business, at my age." + +"And then," sez I reasonably, "the canal runs jest down below our +orchard, and if we run short, we could get all the water we +wanted from there. And we have got two good cisterns and a well +on the place." + +Sez he, "What I mean is, bettin' on a horse. Do you want to bet +on which horse will go the fastest, the black one or the bay one?" + +"No," sez I, "I don't want to bet." + +But he kep' on a urgin' me, and thinkin' I had disappinted him in +sellin' a pool, or rather pond, I thought it wouldn't hurt me to +kinder gin in to him in this, so I sez mildly, "Bettin' is sunthin' +I don't believe in, but seein' I have disappinted you in sellin' +your water power, I don't know as it would be wicked to humor you +in this and say it to please you. You say the bay horse is the +best, so I'll say for jest this once - There! I'll bet the bay +one will go the best." + +"Where is your money?" sez he. "It is five dollars for a bet. +You pay five dollars and you have a chance to get back mebby 100." + +I riz right up in feerful dignity, and the buggy and I sez that +one feerful word to him, "Gamblin'!" He sort a quailed. But sez +he, "you had better take a five-dollar chance on the bay horse." + +"No," sez I, with a freezin' coldness, that must have made his +ears fairly tingle it wuz so cold, "no I shall not gamble, neither +on foot nor on horseback." + +Then I sot down and I sez in the same lofty tones to Josiah +Allen, "Drive on, Josiah, instantly and to once." + +He too had heerd the fearful word and his princeples too wuz +rousted up. He driv right on rapidly, out of the gate and into +the highway. But as he druv on fast and almost furius I heerd +him murmur words to himself, that accounted for his eager looks +while the man wuz dickerin' about the pool. He sez, "It is dumb +hard work pumpin' water for so many head of cattle." He thought +a pool would come handy, so I see. But it wuz all done and I +would have done the same thing if it was to do over agin, so I +didn't say nuthin', but kep' a serene silence, and let him drive +along in quiet; and anon, I see the turbelence of his feelin's +subsided in a measure. + +It wuz a gettin' along towards sundown and the air wuz a growin' +cool and balmy, as if it wuz a blowin' over some balm flowers, +and we begun to feel quite well in our minds, though the crowd +in the road wuz too big for comfert. The crowd of carriages and +horses, and vehicles of all kinds, seemed to go in two big full +rows or streams, one a goin' down on one side of the road, and +the other a goin' up on the other. So the 2 tides swept past +each other constantly -- but the bubbles on the tide wuzn't foam +but feathers, and bows, and laces, and parasols, and buttons, and +diamonds, and etcetry, etcetry, etcetry. + +And all of a sudden my Josiah jest turned into a big gate that +wuz a standin' wide open and we drove into a beautiful quiet road +that went a windin' in under the shadows of the tall grand old +trees. He did it without askin' my advice or sayin' a word to +me. But I wuzn't sorry. Fur it wuz beautiful in there. It +seemed as if we had left small cares and vexations and worryments +out there in the road and dust, and took in with us only repose +and calmness, and peace, and they wuz a journeyin' along with us +on the smooth road under the great trees, a bendin' down on each +side on us. And pretty soon we came to a beautiful piece of +water crossed by a rustick bridge, and all surrounded by green +trees on every side. Then up on the broad road agin, sweepin' +round a curve where we could see a little ways off a great mansion +with a wall built high round it as if to shet in the repose and +sweet home-life and shet out intrusion, sort a protect it from the +too curius glances of a curius generation. Some as I hold my hand +up before my face to keep off the too-scorchin' rays of the sun, +when I am a lookin' down the western road for my Josiah. + +It wuz a good lookin' spot as I ever want to see, sheltered, +quiet and lovely. But we left it behind us as we rode onwards, +till we came out along another broad piece of the water, and we +rode along by the side of it for some time. + +Beautiful water with the trees growin' up on every side of it, +and their shadows reflected so clearly in the shinin' surface, +that they seemed to be trees a growin' downwards, tall grand +trees, wavin' branches, goin' down into the water and livin' agin +in another world, -- a more beautiful one. + +The sun wuz a gettin' low and piles of clouds wuz in the west and +all their light wuz reflected in the calm water. And the beautiful +soft shadows rested there on that rosy and golden light, some like +the shadow of a beautiful and sorrowful memory, a restin' down and +reposin' on a divine hope, an infinite sweetness. + + + + +XIII. + +VISITS TO NOTABLE PLACES. + + +It is a perfect sight to behold, to set on the piazzas at Saratoga, +and see the folks a goin' past. + +Now in Jonesville, when there wuz a 4th of July, or campmeetin', +or sunthin' of that kind a goin' on, why, I thought I had seen +the streets pretty full. Why, I had counted as many as seven +teams in the road at one time, and I had thought that wuz pretty +lively times. But good land? Good land! You would have gin up +in ten minutes time here, that you had never seen a team (as it +were). + +Why I call my head a pretty sound one, but I declare, it did +fairly make my head swim to set there kinder late in the +afternoon, and see the drivin' a goin' on. See the carriages a +goin' this way, and a goin' that way; horses of all colers, and +men and wimmen of all colers, and parasols of all colers, and +hats, and bonnets and parasols, and satins, and laces, and +ribbins, and buttons, and dogs, and flowers, and plumes, and +parasols. And horses a turnin' out to go by, and horses havin' +gone by, and horses that hadn't gone by. And big carriages with +folks inside all dressed up in every coler of the rain beaux. +And elligent gentlemen dressed perfectly splendid, a settin' up +straight behind. With thin yellow legs, or stripes down the side +on 'em, and their hats all trimmed off with ornaments and buttons +up and down their backs. + +Haughty creeters they wuz, I make no doubt. They showed it in +their looks. But I never loved so much dress in a man. And I +would jest as soon have told them so; as to tell you. I hain't +one to say things to a man's back that I won't say to his face, +whether it be a plain back or buttoned. + +Wall, as I say, it wuz a dizzy sight to set there on them piazzas +and see the seemin'ly endless crowd a goin' by; back and forth, +back and forth; to and fro, to and fro. I didn't enjoy it so +much as some did, though for a few minutes at a time I looked +upon it as a sort of a recreation, some like a circus, only more +wilder. + +But some folks enjoyed it dretfully. Yes, they set a great deal +on piazzas at Saratoga. And when I say set on 'em, I mean they +set a great store on 'em, and they set on 'em a great deal. Some +folks set on 'em so much, that I called them setters. Real likely +creeters they are too, some on 'em, and handsome; some pious, +sober ones, some sort a gay. Some not married at all, and some +married a good deal, and when I say a good deal I meen, they have +had various companions and lost 'em. + +Now there wuz one woman that I liked quite well. + +She had had 4 husbands countin' in the present one. She wuz a +good lookin' woman and had seen trouble. It stands to reeson she +had with 4 husbands. Good land! + +She showed me one day a ring she wore. She had took the weddin' +rings of her 4 pardners and had 'em all run together, and the +initials of their first names carved inside on it. Her first +husband's name wuz Franklin, her next two wuz Orville and Obed, +and her last and livin' one Lyman. Wall, she meant well, but she +never see what would be the end on't and how it would read till +she had got their initials all carved out on it. + +She wuz dretfully worked up about it, but I see that it wuz right. + For nobody but a fool would want to run all these recollections +and memories together, all the different essociations and emotions, +that must cluster round each of them rings. The idee of runnin' +'em all together with the livin' one! It wuz ectin' like a fool +and it seemed fairly providential that their names run in jest +that way. + +Why, if I had had 2 husbands, or even 4, I should want to keep +'em apart - settin' up in high chairs on different sides of my +heart. Why, if I'd had 4, I'd have 'em to the different pints of +the compass, east, west, north, south, as far apart from each +other as my heart would admit of. Ketch me a lumpin' in all the +precious memories of my Josiah with them of any other man, bond +or free, Jew or Genteel; no, and I'd refrain from tellin' to the +new one about the other ones. + +No, when a pardner dies and you set out to take another one, bury +the one that has gone right under his own high chair in your heart, +don't keep him up there a rattlin' his bones before the eyes of +the 2d, and angerin' him, and agonizen' your own heart. Bury him +before you bring a new one into the same room. + +And never! never! even in moments of the greatest anger, dig him +up agin or even weep over his grave, before the new pardner. No; +under the moonlight, and the stars, before God only, and your own +soul, you may lay there in spirit on that grave, weep over it, +keep the turf green. But not before any one else. And I wouldn't +advise you to go there alone any too often. I would advise you to +spend your spare time ornementin' the high chair where the new one +sets, wreathin' it round with whatever blossoms and trailin' vines +of tenderness and romance you have left over from the first great +romance of life. + +It would be better for you in the end. + +I said some few of these little thoughts to the female mentioned; +and I s'pose I impressed her dretfully, I s'pose I did. But I +couldn't stay to see the full effects on't, for another female +setter came up at that minute to talk with her, and my companion +came up at that very minute to ask me to go a walkin' with him up +to the cemetery. + +That is a very favorite place for Josiah Allen. He often used to +tell the children when they wuz little, that if they wuz real +good he would take 'em out on a walk to the grave-yard. + +And when I first married to him, if I hadn't broke it up, that +would have been the only place of resort that he would have took +me to Summers. But I broke it up after a while. Good land! +there is times to go any where and times to stay away. I didn't +want to go a trailin' up there every day or two; jest married +too! + +But to-day I felt willin' to go. I had been a lookin' so long at +the crowd a fillin' the streets full, and every one on 'em in +motion, that I thought it would be sort a restful to go out to a +place where they wuz still. And so after a short walk we came to +the village that haint stirred by any commotion or alarm. Where +the houses are roofed with green grass and daisies, and the white +stun doors don't open to let in trouble or joy, and where the +inhabitants don't ride out in the afternoon. + +Wall, if I should tell the truth which I am fur from not wantin' +to do, I should say that at first sight, it wuz rather of a +bleak, lonesome lookin' spot, kinder wild and desolate lookin'. +But as we went further along in it, we came to some little nooks +and sheltered paths and spots, that seemed more collected +together and pleasant. There wuz some big high stuns and +monuments, and some little ones but not one so low that it hadn't +cast a high, dark shadow over somebody's life. + +There wuz one in the shape of a big see shell. I s'pose some +mariner lay under that, who loved the sea. Or mebby it wuz put +up by some one who had the odd fancy that put a shell to your ear +you will hear a whisperin' in it of a land fur away, fur away. +Not fur from this wuz a stun put up over a young engineer who had +been killed instantly by his engine. There wuz a picture of the +locomotive scraped out on the stun, and in the cab of the engine +wuz his photograph, and these lines wuz underneath: + + My engine now lies still and cold, + No water does her boiler hold; + The wood supplies its flames no more, + My days of usefulness are o'er. + +We wended our way in and out of the silent streets for quite a +spell, and then we went and sot down on the broad piazza of the +sort of chapel and green-house that stood not fur from the +entrance. And while we sot there we see another inhabitent come +there to the village to stay. + +It wuz a long procession, fur it wuz a good man who had come. +And many of his friends come with him jest as fur as they could: +wife, children, and friends, they come with him jest as fur as +they could, and then he had to leave 'em and go on alone. How +weak love is, and how strong. It wuz too weak to hold him back, +or go with him, though they would fain have done so. But it wuz +strong enough to shadow the hull world with its blackness, blot +out the sun and the stars, and scale the very mounts of heaven +with its wild complaints and pleadin's. A strange thing love is, +haint it? + +Wall, we sot there for quite a spell and my companion wantin', I +spose, to make me happy, took out a daily paper out of his pocket +and went to readin' the deaths to me. He always loves to read +the deaths and marriages in a paper. He sez that is the +literature that interests him. And then I s'pose he thought at +such a time, it wuz highly appropriate. So I didn't break it up +till he began to read a long obituary piece about a child's +death; about its being cut down like a flower by a lightin' +stroke out of a cloudless sky, and about what a mysterious +dispensation of Providence it wuz, etc., etc. And then there wuz +a hull string of poetry dedicated to the heart-broken mother +bewailin' the mystery on't, and wonderin' why Providence should +do such strange, onlookedfor things, etc., and etcetery, and so +4th. + +And I spoke right up and sez, "That is a slander onto Providence +and ort to be took as such by every lover of justice." + +Josiah wuz real horrified, he had been almost sheddin' tears he +wuz so affected by it; to think the little creeter should be torn +away by a strange chance of Providence from a mother who worshipped +her, and whose whole life and every thought wuz jest wrapped up in +the child, and who never had thought nor cared for anything else +only just the well bein' of the child and wardin' trouble off of +her, for so the piece stated. And he sez in wild amaze, "What do +you mean, Samantha? What makes you talk so?" + +"Because," sez I, "I know it is the truth. I know the hull +story;" and then I went on and told it to him, and he agreed with +me and felt jest as I did. + +You see, the mother of the child wuz a perfect high flyer of +fashion and she always wore dresses so tight, that she couldn't +get her hands up to her head to save her life, after her corset +wuz on. Wall, she wuz out a walkin' with the child one day, or +rather toddlin' along with it, on her high-heeled sboes. They +wuz both dressed up perfectly beautiful, and made a most splendid +show. Wall, they went into a store on their way to the park, and +there wuz a big crowd there, and the mother and the little girl +got into the very middle of the crowd. They say there wuz some +new storks for sale that day, and some cattail flags, and so +there wuz naturelly a big crowd of wimmen a buyin' 'em, and +cranes. And some way, while they stood there a heavy vase that +stood up over the child's head fell down and fell onto it, and +hurt the child so, that it died from the effects of it. + +The mother see the vase when it flrst begun to move, she could +have reached up her hands and stiddied it, and kep' it from +fallin', if she could have got 'em up, but with that corset on, +the hull American continent might have tumbled onto the child's +head and she couldn't have moved her arms up to keep it off; +couldn't have lifted her arms up over the child's head to save +her life. No, she couldn't have kep' one of the States off, nor +nothin'. And then talk about her wardin' trouble offen the +child, why she COULDN'T ward trouble off, nor nothin' else with +that corset on. She screemed, as she see it a comin' down onto +the head of her beloved little child, but that wuz all she could +do. The child wuz wedged in by the throng of folks and couldn't +stir, and they wuz all engrossed in their own business which wuz +pressin', and very important, a buyin' plates, and plaks, with +bull-rushes, and cranes, and storks on 'em, so naturelly, they +didn't mind what wuz a goin' on round 'em. And down it come! + +And there it wuz put down in the paper, "A mysterious dispensation +of Providence." Providence slandered shamefully and I will say so +with my last breath. + +What are mothers made for if it haint to take care of the little +ones God gives 'em. What right have they to contoggle themselves +up in a way that they can see their children die before 'em, and +they not able to put out a hand to save 'em. Why, a savage +mother is better than this, a heathen one. And if I had my way, +there would be a hull shipload of savages and heathens brought +over here to teach and reform our too civilized wimmen. I'd +bring 'em over this very summer. + +Wall, we sot there on the stoop for quite a spell and then we +wended our way down to the highway, and as we arrived there my +companion proposed that we should take a carriage and go to the +Toboggen slide. Sez I, "Not after where we have been today, +Josiah Allen." + +And he sez, "Why not?" + +And I sez, "It wouldn't look well, after visitin' the folks we +have jest now." + +"Wall," sez he, "they won't speak on't to anybody, if that is +what you are afraid on, or sense it themselves." + +And I see in a minute, he had some sense on his side, though his +words shocked me some at first, kinder jarred aginst some +sensitive spot in my nater, jest as pardners will sometimes, +however devoted they may be to each other. Yet I see he wuz in +the right on't. + +They wouldn't sense anything about it. And as for us, we wuz in +the world of the livin' still, and I still owed a livin' duty to +my companion, to make him as happy as possible. And so I sez, +mildly, "Wall, I don't know as there is anything wrong in slidin' +down hill, Josiah. I s'pose I can go with you." + +"No," sez he, "there haint nothin' wrong about slidin' down hill +unless you strike too hard, or tip over, or sunthin'." So he +bagoned to a carriage that wuz passin', and we got into it, and +sot sail for the Toboggen slide. + +We passed through the village. (Some say it is a city, but if it +is, it is a modest, retirin' one as I ever see; perfectly +unassumin', and don't put on a air, not one.) + +But howsumever, we passed through it, through the rows and rows +of summer tarvens and boardin' houses, good-lookin' ones too; +past some good-lookin' private houses -- a long tarven and a +pretty red brick studio and rows of summer stores, little nests +that are filled up summers, and empty winters, then by some more +of them monster big tarvens where some of the 200,000 summer +visitors who flock here summers, find a restin' place; and then +by the large respectable good-lookin' stores and shops of the +natives, that stand solid, and to be depended on summer and +winter; by churches and halls, and etc., and good-lookin' houses +and then some splendid-lookin' houses all standin' back on their +grassy lawns behind some trees, and fountains, and flower beds, +etc., etc. + +Better-lookin' houses, I don't want to see nor broader, handsomer +streets. And pretty soon fur away to the east you could see +through the trees a glimpse of a glorious landscape, a broad +lovely view of hill and valley, bounded by blue mountain tops. +It was a fair seen - a fair seen. To be perfectly surrounded by +beauty where you, wuz, and a lookin' off onto more. There I +would fain have lingered, but time and wagons roll stidily +onward, and will not brook delay, nor pause for women to soar +over seenery. + +So we rolled onwards through still more beautiful, and quiet +pictures. Pictures of quiet woods and bendin' trees, and a +country road windin' tranquilly beneath, up and down gentle hills, +and anon a longer one, and then at our feet stood the white walls +of a convent, with 2 or 3 brothers, a strollin' along in their +long black gowns, and crosses, a readin' some books. + +I don't know what it wuz, what they wuz a readin' out of their +books, or a readin' out of their hearts. Mebby sunthin' kinder +sad and serene. Mebby it wuz sunthin' about the gay world of +human happiness, and human sorrows, they had turned backs to +forever. Mebby it wuz about the other world that they had sot +out for through a lonesome way. Mebby it wuz "Never" they wuz a +readin' about, and mebby it wuz "Forever." I don't know what it +wuz. But we went by 'em, and anon, yes it wuz jest anon, for it +wuz the very minute that I lifted my eyes from the Father's calm +and rather sad-lookin' face, that I ketched sight on't, that I +see a comin' down from the high hills to the left on us, an +immense sort of a trough, or so it looked, a comin' right down +through the trees, from the top of the mountain to the, bottom. +And then all acrost the fields as fur, as fur as from our house +way over to Miss Pixley's wuz a sort of a road, with a row of +electric lights along the side on't. + +We drove up to a buildin' that stood at the foot of that immense +slide, or so they called it, and a female woman who wuz there +told us all about it. And we went out her back door, and see way +up the slide, or trough. There wuz a railin' on each side on't, +and a place in the middle where she said the Toboggen came down. + +And sez Josiah, "Who is the Toboggen, anyway? Is he a native of +the place or a Injun? Anyway," sez he, "I'd give a dollar bill +to see him a comin' down that place." + +And the woman said, "A Toboggen wuz a sort of a long sled, that +two or three folks could ride on, and they come down that slide +with such force that they went way out acrost the fields as far +as the row of lights, before it stopped." + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen, did you ever see the beat on't?" Sez I, +"Haint that as far as from our house to Miss Pixley's?" + +"Yes," says he, "and further too. It is as far as Uncle Jim +Hozzleton's." + +"Wall," says I, "I believe you are in the right on't." + +And sez Josiah, "How do they get back agin? Do they come in the +cars, or in their own conveniences?" + +"There is a sleigh to bring 'em back, but sometime they walk +back," sez the woman. + +"Walk back!" sez I, in deep amaze. "Do they walk from way out +there, and cleer up that mountain agin?" + +"Yes," sez she. "Don't you see the place at the side for 'em to +draw the Toboggen up, and the little flights of steps for 'em to +go up the hill?" + +"Wall," sez I, in deep amaze, and auxins as ever to get +information on deep subjects, "where duz the fun come in, is it +in walkin' way over the plain and up the hills, or is it in +comin' down?" + +And she said she didn't know exactly where the fun lay, but she +s'posed it wuz comin' down. Anyway, they seemed to enjoy it +first rate. And she said it wuz a pretty sight to see 'em all on +a bright clear night, when the sky wuz blue and full of stars, +and the earth white and glistenin' underneath to see 7 or 800, +all dressed up in to gayest way, suits of white blankets, gay +borders and bright tasseled caps of every color, and suits of +every other pretty color all trimmed with fur and embroideries, +to see 'em all a laughin' and a talkin', with their cheeks and +eyes bright and glowin', to see 'em a comin' down the slide like +flashes of every colored light, and away out over the white +glistenin' plains; and then to see the long line of happy laughin' +creeters a walkin' back agin' drawin' the gay Toboggens. She +said it wuz a sight worth seein'. + +"Do they come down alone?" sez Josiah. + +"Oh no!" sez she. "Boys and their sweethearts, men and wives, +fathers and mothers and children, sometimes 4 on a Toboggan." + +Sez Josiah, lookin' anamated and clever, "I'd love to take you on +one on 'em, Samantha.' + +"Oh no!" sez I, "I wouldn't want to be took." + +But a bystander a standin' by said it wuz a sight to behold to +stand up on top and start off. He said the swiftness of the +motion, the brightness of the electric lights ahead, the gleam of +the snow made it seem like plungin' down a dazzlin' Niagara of +whiteness and glitterin' light; and some, like bein' shot out of +a cannon. Why, he said they went with such lightnin' speed, that +if you stood clost by the slide a waitin' to see a friend go by, +you might stand so near as to touch her, but you couldn't no more +see her to recognize her, than you could recognize one spoke from +another in the wheel of a runaway carriage. You would jest see a +red flash go by, if so be it wuz a red gown she had on. A red +flash a dartin' through the air, and a disappearin' down the long +glitterin' lane of light. + +You could see her a goin' back, so they said, a laughin' and a +jokin' with somebody, if so be she walked back, but there wuz +long sleighs to carry 'em back, them and their Toboggens, if they +wanted to ride, at the small expenditure of 10 cents apiece. +They go, in the fastest time anybody can make till they go on the +lightnin', a way in which they will go before long, I think, and +Josiah duz too. + +"They said there wuzn't nothin' like it. And I said, "Like as +not." I believed 'em. And then the woman said, "This long room +we wuz a standin' in," for we had gone back into the house, +durin' our interview, this long room wuz all warm and light for +'em to come into and get warm, and she said as many as 600 in a +night would come in there and have supper there. + +And then she showed us the model of a Toboggen, all sculped out, +with a man and a woman on it. The girl wuz ahead sort a drawin' +the Toboggen, as you may say, and her lover. (I know he wuz, +from his looks.) He wuz behind her, with his face right clost to +her shoulder. + +And I'll bet that when they started down that gleamin' slide, +they felt as if they 2 wuz alone under the stars and the heavens, +and wuz a glidin' down into a dazzlin' way of glory. You could +see it in their faces. I liked their faces real well. + +But the sight on 'em made Josiah Allen crazier'n ever to go too, +and he sez, "I feel as if I must Toboggen, Samantha!" + +Sez I, "Be calm! Josiah, you can't slide down hill in July." + +"How do you know?" sez he, "I'm bound to enquire." And he asked +the woman if they ever Toboggened in the summer. + +"No, never!" sez she. + +And I sez, "You see it can't be done." + +"She never see it tried," sez he. "How can you tell what you can +do without tryin'?" sez he lookin' shrewdly, and longingly, up +the slide. I trembled, for I knew not what the next move of his +would be. But I bethought me of a powerful weepon I had by me. +And I sez, "The driver will ask pay for every minute we are +here." + +And as I sez this, Josiah turned and almost flew down the steps +and into the buggy. I had skairt him. Truly I felt relieved, +and sez I to myself, "What would wimmen do if it wuzn't for these +little weepons they hold in their hands, to control their +pardners with." I felt happy. + +But the next words of Josiah knocked down all that palace of +Peace, that my soul had betook herself to. Sez he, "Samantha +Allen, before I leave Saratoga I shall Toboggen." + +Wall, I immegetly turned the subject round and talked wildly and +almost incoherently on politicks. I praised the tariff amost +beyond its deserts. I brung up our foreign relations, and spoke +well on 'em. I tackled revenues and taxation, and hurried him +from one to the other on 'em, almost wildly, to get the idee out +of his head. And I congratulated myself on havin' succeeded. +Alas! how futile is our hopes, sometimes futiler than we have any +idee on! + +By night all thoughts of danger had left me, and I slept sweetly +and peacefully. But early in the mornin' I had a strange dream. +I dreamed I wuz in the woods with my head a layin' on a log, and +the ground felt cold that I wuz a layin' on. And then the log +gin way with me, and my head came down onto the ground. And then +I slept peaceful agin, but chilly, till anon, or about that time, +I beard a strange sound and I waked up with a start. It wuz in +the first faint glow of mornin' twilight. But as faint as the +light wuz, for the eye of love is keen, I missed my beloved +pardner's head from the opposite pillow, and I riz up in wild +agitation and thinkses I, "Has rapine took place here; has Josiah +Allen been abducted away from me? Is he a kidnapped Josiah?" + +At that fearful thought my heart begun to beat so voyalently as +to almost stop my breath, and I felt I wuz growin' pale and wan, +wanner, fur wanner than I had been sense I came to Saratoga. I +love Josiah Allen, he is dear to me. + +And I riz up feelin' that I would find that dear man and rescue +him or perish in the attempt. Yes, I felt that I must perish if +I did not find him. What would life be to me without him? And +as I thought that thought the light of the day that wuz a +breakin', looked sort of a faint to me, and sickish. And like a +flash it came to me, the thought that that light seemed like the +miserable dawns of wretched days without him, a pale light with +no warmth or brightness in it. + +But at that very minute I heard a noise outside the door, and I +heard that beloved voice a sayin' in low axents the words I had +so often heard him speak, words I had oft rebuked him for, but +now, so weak will human love make one, now, I welcome them gladly +-- they sounded exquisitely sweet to me. The words wuz, "Dumb +'em!" + +And I joyfully opened the door. But oh! what a sight met my eye. +There stood Josiah Allen, arrayed in a blanket he had took from +our bed (that accounted for my cold feelin' in my dream). The +blanket wuz white, with a gay border of red and yellow. He had +fixed it onto him in a sort of a dressy way, and strapped it +round the waist with my shawl strap. And he had took a bright +yeller silk handkerchief of hisen, and had wrapped it round his +head so's it hung down some like a cap, and he wuz a tryin' to +fasten it round his forward with one of my stockin' supporters. +He couldn't buckle it, and that is what called forth his +exclamations. At his feet, partly upon the stairs, wuz the +bolster from our bed (that accounted for the log that had gin +way). And he had spread a little red shawl of mine over the top +on't, and as I opened the door he wuz jest ready to embark on the +bolster, he waz jest a steppin' onto it. But as he see me he +paused, and I sez in low axents, "What are you a goin' to do, +Josiah Allen?" + +"I'm a goin' to Toboggen," sez he. + +Sez I, "Do you stop at once, and come back into your room." + +"No, no!" sez he firmly, and preparin' to embark on the bolster, +"I am a goin' to Toboggen. And you come and go to. It is so +fashionable," sez he, "such a genteel diversion." + +Sez I, "Do you stop it at once, and come back to your room. +Why," sez I, "the hull house will be routed up, and be up here in +a minute." + +"Wall," sez he, "they'll see fun if they do and fashion. I am a +goin', Samantha!" and be stepped forward. + +Sez I, "They'll see sunthin' else that begins with a f, but it +haint fun or fashion.' And agin I sez, "Do you come back, Josiah +Allen. You'll break your neck and rout up the house, and be +called a fool." + +"Oh no, Samantha! I must Toboggen. I must go down the slide +once." And he fixed the bolster more firmly on the top stair. + +"Wall," sez I, feelin' that I wuz drove to my last ambush by him, +sez I, "probably five dollars won't make the expenses good, +besides your doctor's bill, and my mornin'. And I shall put on +the deepest of crape, Josiah Allen," sez I. + +I see he wavered and I pressed the charge home. Sez I, "That +bolster is thin cloth, Josiah Allen, and you'll probably have to +pay now for draggin' it all over the floor. If anybody should +see you with it there, that bolster would be charged in your +bill. And how would it look to the neighbors to have a bolster +charged in your bill? And I should treasure it, Josiah Allen, as +bein' the last bill you made before you broke your neck !" + +"Oh, wall," sez he, "I s'pose I can put the bolster back." But +he wuz snappish, and he kep' snappish all day. + +He wuzn't quelled. Though he had gin in for the time bein' I see +he wuzn't quelled down. He acted dissatisfied and highheaded, +and I felt worried in my mind, not knowin' what his next move +would be. + +Oh! the tribulations it makes a woman to take care of a man. But +then it pays. After all, in the deepest of my tribulations I +feel, I do the most of the time feel, that it pays. When he is +good he is dretful good. + +Wall, I went over to see Polly Pixley the next night, and when I +got back to my room, there stood Josiah Allen with both of his +feet sort a bandaged and tied down onto sumthin', which I didn't +at first recognize. It waz big and sort a egg shaped, and open +worked, and both his feet wuz strapped down tight onto it, and he +wuz a pushin' himself round the room with his umberell. + +And I sez, "What is the matter now, Josiah Allen; what are you a +doin' now?" + +"Oh I am a walkin' on snow-shoes, Samantha! But I don't see," +sez he a stoppin' to rest, for he seemed tuckered out, "I don't +see how the savages got round as they did and performed such +journeys. You put 'em on, Samantha," sez he, "and see if you can +get on any faster in 'em." + +Sez I, coldly, "The savages probable did'nt have both feet on one +shoe, Josiah Allen, as you have. I shall put on no snowshoes in +the middle of July; but if I did, I should put 'em on accordin' +to a little mite of sense. I should try to use as much sense as +a savage any way." + +"Why, how it would look to have one foot on that great big +snow-shoe. I always did like a good close fit in my shoes. And +you see I have room enough and to spare for both on 'em on this. +Why it wouldn't look dressy at all, Samantha, to put 'em on as +you say." + +Sez I very coldly, "I don't see anything over and above dressy in +your looks now, Josiah Allen, with both of your feet tied down +onto that one shoe, and you a tryin' to move off when you can't. +I can't see anything over and above ornamental in it, Josiah +Allen." + +"Oh! you are never willin' to give in that I look dressy, +Samantha. But I s'pose I can put my feet where you say. You are +so sot, but they are too big for me -- I shall look like a fool." + +I looked at him calmly over my specks, and sez I, "I guess I +sha'n't notice the difference or realize the change. I wonder," +sez I, in middlin' cold axents, "how you think you are a lookin' +now, Josiah Allen." + +"Oh! keep a naggin' at me!" sez he. But I see he wuz a gittin' +kinder sick of the idee. + +"What you mean by puttin' 'em on at all is more than I can say," +sez I, "a tryin to walk on snowshoes right in dog-days." + +"I put 'em on," Samantha, sez he, a beginnin' to unstrap 'em, "I +put 'em on because I wanted to feel like a savage." + +"Wall," sez I, "I have seen you at times durin' the last 20 years, +when I thought you realized how they felt without snow-shoes on, +either." + +(These little interchanges of confidence will take place in +every-day life.) But at that very minute Ardelia Tutt rapped at +the door, and Josiah hustled them snow-shoes into the closet, and +that wuz the last trial I had with him about 'em. He had +borrowed 'em. + +Wall, Ardelia wuz dretful pensive, and soft actin' that night, +she seemed real tickled to see us, and to get where we wuz. She +haint over and above suited with the boardin' place where she is, +I think. I don't believe they have very good food, though she +won't complain, bein' as they are relations on her own side. And +then she is sech a good little creeter anyway. But I had my +suspicions. She didn't seem very happy. She said she had been +down to the park that afternoon, she and the young chap that has +been a payin' her so much attention lately, Bial Flamburg. She +said they had sot down there by the deer park most all the +afternoon a watchin' the deer. She spoke dretful well of the +deer. And they are likely deer for anything I know. But she +seemed sort a pensive and low spirited. Mebby she is a beginnin' +to find Bial Flamburg out. Mebby she is a beginnin' to not like +his ways. He drinks and smokes, that I know, and I've mistrusted +worse things on him. + + + + +XIV. + +LAKE GEORGE AND MOUNT McGREGOR. + + +It wuz on a nice pleasant day that Ardelia Tuit, Josiah Allen, +and me, met by previous agreement quite early in the mornin', A. +M., and sot out for Lake George. It is so nigh, that you can +step onto the cars, and go out and see George any time of day. + +It seemed to me jest as if George wuz glad we had come, for there +wuz a broad happy smile all over his face, and a sort of a dimplin' +look, as if he wanted to laugh right out. All the beckonin' shores +and islands, with their beautiful houses on 'em, and the distant +forests, and the trees a bendin' over George, all seemed to sort a +smile out a welcome to us. We had a most beautiful day, and got +back quite late in the afternoon, P. M. + +And the next day, a day heavenly calm and fair, Josiah Allen and +me sot sail for Mount McGregor -- that mountain top that is +lifted up higher in the hearts of Americans than any other peak +on the continent -- fur higher. For it is the place where the +memory of a Hero lays over all the peaceful landscape like a +inspiration and a benediction, and will rest there forever. + +The railroad winds round and round the mountain sometimes not +seemin'ly goin' up at all, but gradually a movin' in' on towards +the top, jest as this brave Hero did in his career. If some of +the time he didn't seem to move on, or if some of the time he +seemed to go back for a little, yet there wuz a deathless fire +inside on him, a power, a strength that kep' him a goin' up, up, +up, and drawin' the nation up with him onto the safe level ground +of Victory. + +We got pleasant glimpses of beauty, pretty pictures on't, every +little while as we wended our way on up the mountains. Anon we +would go round a curve, a ledge of rocks mebby, and lo! far off a +openin' through the woods would show us a lovely picture of hill +and dell, blue water and blue mountains in the distance. And +then a green wood picture, shut in and lonely, with tall ferns, +and wild flowers, and thick green grasses under the bendin' +trees. Then fur down agin' a picture of a farmhouse, sheltered +and quiet, with fields layin' about it green and golden. + +But anon, we reached the pretty little lonesome station, and +there we wuz on top of Mount McGregor. We disembarked from the +cars and wended our way up the hill up the windin' foot path, +wore down by the feet of pilgrims from every land, quite a tegus +walk though beautiful, up to the good-lookin', and good appearin' +tarven. + +I would fain have stopped at that minute at the abode the Hero +had sanctified by his last looks. But my companion said to me +that he wuz in nearly a starvin' state. Now it wuzn't much after +11 A. M. forenoon, and I felt that he would not die of starvation +so soon. But his looks wuz pitiful in the extreme and he reminded +me in a sort of a weak voice that he didn't eat no breakfast +hardly. + +I sez truthfully, "I didn't notice it, Josiah." But sez I, "I +will accompany you where your hunger can be slaked." So we went +straight up to the tarven. + +But I would stop a minute in front of it, to see the lovely, +lovely seen that wuz spread out before our eyes. For fur off +could we see milds and milds of the beautiful country a layin' +fur below us. Beautiful landscape, dotted with crystal lakes, +laved by the blue Hudson and bordered by the fur-away mountains. + +It wuz a fair seen, a fair seen. Even Josiah wuz rousted up by +it, and forgot his hunger. I myself wuz lost in the contemplation +on it, and entirely by the side of myself. So much so, that I +forgot where I wuz, and whether I wuz a wife or a widow, or what +I wuz. + +But anon, as my senses came back from the realm of pure beauty +they had been a traversin', I recollected that I wuz a wife, that +Providence and Elder Minkley had placed a man in my hands to take +care on; and I see he wuz gone from me, and I must look him up. + +And I found that man in one of the high tallish lookin' swing +chairs that wuz a swingin' from high poles all along the brow of +the hill. They looked some like a stanchol for a horse, and some +like a pair of galluses that criminals are hung on. + +Josiah wuzn't able to work it right and it did require a deep +mind to get into one without peril. And he wuz on the brink of +a catastrophe. I got him out by siezin' the chair and holdin' +it tight, till he dismounted from it -- which he did with words +unadapted to the serenity of the atmosphere. And then we went +out the broad pleasant door-yard up into the tarven, and my +companion got some coffee, and some refreshments, to refresh +ourselves with. And then he, feelin' clever and real +affectionate to me (owin' partly I s'pose to the good dinner), +we wended our way down to the cottage where the Hero met his +last foe and fell victorious. + +We went up the broad steps onto the piazza, and I looked off from +it, and over all the landscape under the soft summer sky, lay +that same beautiful tender inspired memory. It lay like the hush +that follows a prayer at a dyin' bed. Like the glow that rests +on the world when the sun has gone down in glory. Like the +silence full of voices that follows a oriter's inspired words. + +The air, the whole place, thrilled with that memory, that +presence that wuz with us, though unseen to the eyes of our +spectacles. It followed us through the door way, it went ahead +on us into the room where the pen wuz laid down for the last +time, where the last words wuz said. That pen wuz hung up over +the bed where the tired head had rested last. By the bedside wuz +the candle blowed out, when he got to the place where it is so +light they don't need candles. The watch stopped at the time +when he begun to recken time by the deathless ages of immortality. +And as I stood there, I said to myself, "I wish I could see the +faces that wuz a bendin' over this bed, August 11th, 1885." + +All the ministerin' angels, and heroes, and conquerors, all a +waitin' for him to join 'em. All the Grand Army of the Republic, +them who fell in mountain and valley; the lamented and the +nameless, all, all a waitin' for the Leader they loved, the +silent, quiet man, whose soul spoke, who said in deeds what +weaker spirits waste in language. + +I wished I could see the great army that stood around Mount +McGregor that day. I wished I could hear the notes of the +immortal revelee, which wuz a soundin' all along the lines +callin' him to wake from his earth sleep into life -- callin' +him from the night here, the night of sorrow and pain, into +the mornin'. + +And as I lifted my eyes, the eyes of the General seemed to look +cleer down into my soul, full of the secrets that he could tell +now, if he wanted to, full of the mysteries of life, the mysteries +of death. The voiceless presence that filled the hull landscape, +earth and air, looked at us through them eyes, half mournful, +prophetic, true and calm, they wuz a lookin' through all the past, +through all the future. What did they see there? I couldn't tell, +nor Josiah. + +In another room wuz the flowers from many climes. Flowers +strewed onto the stage from hands all over the world, when the +foot lights burned low, and the dark curtain went down for the +last time on the Hero. Great masses of flowers, every one on +'em, bearin' the world's love, the world's sorrow over our +nation's loss. + +I had a large quantity of emotions as I stood there, probably as +many as 48 a minute for quite a spell, and that is a large number +of emotions to have, when the size of 'em is as large as the +sizes of 'em wuz. I thought as I stood there of what I had hearn +the Hero said once in his last illness, that, liftin' up his +grand right arm that had saved the Nation, he said, "I am on duty +from four to six." + +Yes, thinkses I, he wuz on duty all through the shadows and the +darkness of war, all through the peril, and the heartache, and +the wild alarm of war, calm and dauntless, he wuz on duty till +the mornin' of peace came, and the light wuz shinin'. + +On duty through the darkness. No one believed, no one dared to +think that if peril had come again to the country, he would not +have been ready,-- ready to face danger and death for the people +he had saved once, the people whom he loved, because he had dared +death for 'em. + +Yes, he wuz on duty. + +There wuz a darker shadow come to him than any cloud that ever +rose over a battle-field when, honest and true himself as the +light, he still stood under the shadow of blame and impendin' +want, stood in the blackest shadow that can cover generous, +faithful hearts, the heart-sickenin' shadow of ingratitude; when +the people he had saved from ruin hesitated, and refused to give +him in the time of his need the paltry pension, the few dollars +out of the millions he had saved for them, preferring to allow +him, the greatest hero of the world, the man who had represented +them before the nations, to sell the badges and swords he had +worn in fightin' their battles, for bread for himself and wife. + +But he wuz on duty all through this night. Patient, uncomplainin'. +And not one of these warriors fightin' their bloodless battle of +words aginst him, would dare to say that he would not have been +ready at any minute, to give his life agin for these very men, had +danger come to the country and they had needed him. + +And when hastened on by the shock, and the suspense, death seemed +to be near him, so near that it seemed as if the burden must needs +be light -- the tardy justice that came to him must have seemed +like an insult, but if he thought so he never said it; no, brave +and patient, he wuz on duty. + +And all through the long, long time that he looked through the +shadows for a more sure foe than had ever lain in Southern ambush +for him, he wuz on duty. Not an impatient word, not an anxious +word. Of all the feerin', doubtin', hopin', achin' hearts about +him, he only wuz calm. + +For, not only his own dear ones, but the hull country, friends +and foes alike, as if learnin' through fear of his loss how grand +a hero he wuz, and how greatly and entirely he wuz beloved by +them all, they sent up to Heaven such a great cloud of prayers +for his safety as never rose for any man. But he only wuz calm, +while the hull world wuz excited in his behalf. + +For the sight of his patient work, the sight of him who stopped +dyin' (as it were) to earn by his own brave honest hand the +future comfort of his family, amazed, and wonderin' at this +spectacle, one of the greatest it seems to me that ever wuz seen +on earth, the hull nation turned to him in such a full hearted +love, and admiration, and worship, that they forgot in their +quicker adorin' heart-throbs, the slower meaner throbs they had +gin him, this same brave Hero, jest as brave and true-hearted in +the past as he wuz on his grand death-bed. + +They forgot everything that had gone by in their worship, and I +don't know but I ort to. Mebby I had. I shouldn't wonder a mite +if I had. But all the while, all through the agony and the labor, +and when too wearied he lay down the pen, -- he wuz on duty. + +Waitin' patiently, fearlessly, till he should see in the first +glow of the sunrise the form of the angel comin' to relieve his +watch, the tall, fair angel of Rest, that the Great Commander +sent down in the mornin' watches to relieve his weary soldier, +that divinest angel that ever comes to the abode of men, though +her beauty shines forever through tears, led by her hand, he has +left life's battle-field forever; and what is left to this nation +but memory, love, and mebby remorse. + +But little matters it to him, the Nation's love or the Nation's +blame, restin' there by the calm waters he loved. The tides come +in, and the tides go out; jest as they did in his life; the +fickle tide of public favor that swept by him, movin' him not on +his heavenly mission of duty and patriotism. + +The tides go out, and the tides come in; the wind wails and the +wind sings its sweet summer songs; but he does not mind the +melody or the clamor. He is resting. Sleep on, Hero beloved, +while the world wakes to praise thee. + +Wall, we sot sail from Mount McGregor about half-past four P. M., +afternoon. And we wound round and round the mountain side jest +as he did, only goin' down into the valley instid of upwards. +But the trees that clothed the bare back of the mountain looked +green and shinin' in the late afternoon sunlight, and the fields +spread out in the valley looked green and peaceful under the cool +shadows of approachin' sunset. + +And right in the midst of one of these fields, all full of white +daisies, the cars stopped and the conductor sung out: "Five +minutes' stop at Daisy station. Five minutes to get out and pick +daisies." + +And sez Josiah to me in gruff axents, when I asked him if he wuz +goin' to get out and pick some. Sez he, "Samantha, no man can go +ahead of me in hatin' the dumb weeds, and doin' his best towards +uprootin' 'em in my own land; and I deeply sympathize with any +man who is over run by 'em. But why am I beholdin' to the man +that owns this lot? Why should I and all the rest of this +carload of folks, all dressed up in our best too, lay hold and +weed out these infernal nuisances for nothin'?" + +Yes, he said these fearfully profane words to me and I herd him +in silence, for I did not want to make a seen in public. Sez I, +"Josiah, they are pickin' 'em because they love 'em." + +"Love 'em!" Oh, the fearful, scornful unbelievin' look that came +over my pardner's face, as I said these peaceful words to him. +And he added a expletive which I am fur from bein' urged to ever +repeat. It wuz sinful. + +"Love 'em!" Agin he sez. And agin follerd a expletive that wuz +still more forcible, and still more sinful. And I felt obliged +to check him which I did. And after a long parlay, in which I +used my best endeavors of argument and reason to convince him +that I wuz in the right on't, I see he wuzn't convinced. And +then I spoke about its bein' fashionable to get out and pick 'em, +and he looked different to once. I could see a change in him. +All my arguments of the beauty and sweetness of the posies had no +effect, but when I said fashionable, he faltered, and he sez, "Is +it called a genteel diversion?" + +And I sez, "Yes." + +And finally he sez, "Wall, I s'pose I can go out and pick some +for you. Dumb their dumb picters." + +Sez I, "Don't go in that spirit, Josiah Allen." + +"Wall, I shall go in jest that sprit," he snapped out, "if I go +at all." And he went. + +But oh! it wuz a sight to set and look on, and see the look onto +his face, as he picked the innocent blossoms. It wuz a look of +such deep loathin', and hatred, combined with a sort of a genteel, +fashionable air. + +Altogether it wuz the most curius, and strange look, that I ever +see outside of a menagery of wild animals. And he had that same +look onto his face as he came in and gin 'em to me. He had +yanked'em all up by their roots too, which made the Bokay look +more strange. But I accepted of it in silence, for I see by his +mean that he wuz not in a condition to brook another word. + +And I trembled when a bystander a standin' by who wuz arrangin' +a beautiful bunch of 'em, a handlin' 'em as flowers ort to be +handled, as if they had a soul, and could feel a rough or tender +touch, -- this man sez to Josiah, "I see that you too love this +beautiful blossom." + +I wuz glad the man's eyes wuz riveted onto his Bokay, for the +ferocity of Josiah Allen's look wuz sunthin' fearful. He looked +as if he could tear him lim' from lim'. + +And I hastily drawed Josiah to a seat at the other end of the +car, and voyalently, but firmly, I drawed his attention off onto +Religion. + +I sez, "Josiah, do you believe we had better paint the steeple of +the meetin'-house, white or dark colered?" + +This wuz a subject that had rent Jonesville to its very twain. +And Josiah had been fearfully exercised on it. And this plan of +mine succeeded. He got eloquent on it, and I kinder held off, +and talked offish, and let him convince me. + +I did it from principle. + + + + +XV. + +ADVENTURES AT VARIOUS SPRINGS. + + +A few days after this, Josiah Allen came in, and sez he, "The +Everlastin' spring is the one for me, Samantha! I believe it +will keep me alive for hundreds and hundreds of years." + +Sez I, "I don't believe that, Josiah Allen." + +"Wall, it is so, whether you believe it or not. Why, I see a +feller just now who sez he don't believe anybody would ever die +at all, if they kep' themselves' kind a wet through all the time +with this water." + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen, you are not talkin' Bible. The Bible sez, +'all flesh is as grass.'" + +"Wall, that is what he meant; if the grass wuz watered with that +water all the time, it would never wilt." + +"Oh, shaw!" sez I. (I seldom say shaw, but this seemed to me a +time for shawin'.) + +But Josiah kep' on, for he wuz fearfully excited. Sez he, "Why, +the feller said, there wuz a old man who lived right by the side +of this spring, and felt the effects of it inside and out all the +time, it wuz so healthy there. Why the old man kep' on a livin', +and a livin' till he got to be a hundred. And he wuz kinder lazy +naturally and he got tired of livin'. He said he wuz tired of +gettin' up mornin's and dressin' of him, tired of pullin' on his +boots and drawin' on his trowsers, and he told his grandson Sam +to take him up to Troy and let him die. + +"Wall, Sam took him up to Troy, and he died right away, almost. +And Sam bein' a good-hearted chap, thought it would please the +old man to he buried down by the spring, that healthy spot. So +he took him back there in a wagon he borrowed. And when he got +clost to the spring, Sam heard a sithe, and he looked back, and +there the old gentleman wuz a settin' up a leanin' his head on +his elbo and he sez, in a sort of a sad way, not mad, but +melanecolly, `You hadn't ort to don it, Sam. You hadn't ort to. +I'm in now for another hundred years.'" + +I told Josiah I didn't believe that. Sez I, "I believe the +waters are good, very good, and the air is healthy here in the +extreme, but I don't believe that." + +But he said it wuz a fact, and the feller said he could prove it. +"Why," Josiah sez, "with the minerals there is in that spring, if +you only take enough of it, I don't see how anybody can die." +And sez Josiah, "I am a goin' to jest live on that water while I +am here." + +"Wall," sez I, "you must do as you are a mind to, with fear and +tremblin'." + +I thought mebby quotin' Scripture to him would kinder quell him +down, for he wuz fearfully agitated and wrought up about the +Everlastin' spring. And he begun at once to calculate on it, on +how much he could drink of it, if he begun early in the mornin' +and drinked late at night. + +But I kep' on megum. I drinked the waters that seemed to help me +and made me feel better, but wuz megum in it, and didn't get over +excited about any on 'em. But oh! oh! the quantities of that +water that Josiah Allen took! Why, it seemed as if he would make +a perfect shipwreck of his own body, and wash himself away, till +one day he came in fearful excited agin, and sez he, in agitated +axents, "I made a mistake, Samantha. The Immortal spring is the +one for me." + +"Why?" sez I. + +"Oh, I have jest seen a feller that has been a tellin' me about it." + +"What did he say?" sez I, in calm axents. + +"Wall, I'll tell you. It has acted on my feelin's dretful." Says +he, "I have shed some tears." (I see Josiah Allen had been a +cryin' when he came in.) + +And I sez agin, "What is it?" + +"Wall," he said, "this man had a dretful sick wife. And he wuz a +carryin' her to the Immortal spring jest as fast as he could, for +he felt it would save her, if he could get her to it. But she +died a mile and a half from the spring. It wuz night, for he had +traveled night and day to get her there, and the tarvens wuz all +shut up, and he laid her on the spring-house floor, and laid down +himself on one of the benches. He took a drink himself, the last +thing before he laid down, for he felt that he must have sunthin' +to sustain him in his affliction. + +"Wall, in the night he heard a splashin', and he rousted up, and +he see that he had left the water kinder careless the night before, +and it had broke loose and covered the floor and riz up round the +body, and there she wuz, all bright and hearty, a splashin' and a +swimmin' round in the water." He said the man cried like a child +when he told him of it. + +And sez Josiah, "It wuz dretful affectin'. It brought tears from +me, to hear on't. I thought what if it had been you, Samantha!" + +"Wall," sez I, "I don't see no occasion for tears, unless you +would have been sorry to had me brung to." + +"Oh!" sez Josiah, "I didn't think! I guess I have cried in the +wrong place." + +Sez I coldly, "I should think as much." + +And Josiah put on his hat and hurried out. He meant well. But +it is quite a nack for pardners to know jest when to cry, and +when to laff. + +Wall, he follered up that spring, and drinked more, fur more than +wuz good for him of that water. And then anon, he would hear of +another one, and some dretful big story about it, and he would +foller that up, and so it went on, he a follerin' on, and I a +bein' megum, and drinkin' stiddy, but moderate. And as it might +be expected, I gained in health every day, and every hour. For +the waters is good, there haint no doubt of it. + +But Josiah takin' em as he did, bobbin' round from one to the +other, drinkin' 'em at all hours of day and night, and floodin' +himself out with 'em, every one on 'em -- why, he lost strength +and health every day, till I felt truly, that if it went on much +longer, I should go home in weeds. Not mullein, or burdock, or +anything of that sort, but crape. + +But at last a event occurred that sort a sot him to thinkin' and +quelled him down some. One day we sot out for a walk, Josiah and +Ardelia Tutt and me. And in spite of all my protestations, my +pardner had drinked 11 glasses full of the spring he wuz a +follerin' then. And he looked white round the lips as anything. +And Ardelia and I wuz a sittin' in a good shady place, and Josiah +a little distance off, when a man ackosted him, a man with black +eyes and black whiskers, and sez, "You look pale, Sir. What +water are you a drinkin'?" + +And Josiah told him that at that time he wuz a drinkin' the water +from the Immortal spring. + +"Drinkin' that water?" sez the man, startin' back horrefied. + +"Yes," sez Josiah, turnin' paler than ever, for the man's looks +wuz skairful in the extreme. + +"Oh! oh!" groaned the man. "And you are a married man?" he groaned +out mournfully, a lookin' pitifully at him. "With a family?" + +"Yes," sez Josiah, faintly. + +"Oh dear," sez the man, "must it be so, to die, so -- so lamented?" + +"To die!" sez Josiah, turnin' white jest round the lip. + +"Yes, to die! Did you not say you had been a drinkin' the water +from the Immortal spring?" + +"Yes," sez Josiah. + +"Wall, it is a certain, a deadly poison." + +"Haint there no help for me?" sez Josiah. + +"Yes," sez the man, "You must drink from the Live-forever spring, +at the other end of the village. That water has the happy effect +of neutralizin' the poisons of the Immortal spring. If anything +can save you that can. Why," sez he, "folks that have been +entirely broke down, and made helpless and hopeless invalids, +them that have been brung down on their death-beds by the use of +that vile Immortal water, have been cured by a few glasses of the +pure healin' waters of the Live-forever spring. I'd advise you +for your own sake, and the sake of your family, who would mourn +your ontimely decese, to drink from that spring at once." + +"But," sez Josiah, with a agonized and hopeless look, "I can't +drink no more now." + +"Why?" sez the man. + +"Because I don't hold any more. I don't hold but two quarts, and +I have drinked 11 tumblers full now." + +"Eleven glasses of that poison?" sez the man. + +"Wall, if it is too late I am not to blame. I've warned you. +Farewell," sez he, a graspin' holt of Josiah's hand. "Farewell, +forever. But if you do live," sez he, "if by a miricle you are +saved, remember the Live-forever spring. If there is any help +for you it is in them waters." + +And he dashed away, for another stranger wuz approachin' the +seen. + +I, myself, didn't have no idee that Josiah wuz a goin' to die. +But Ardelia whispered to me, she must go back to the hotel, so +she went. I see she looked kinder strange, and I didn't object +to it. And when we got back she handed me some verses entitled: + +"Stanzas on the death of Josiah Allen." + +She handed 'em to me, and hastened away, quick. But Josiah Allen +didn't die. And this incident made him more megum. More as I +wanted him to be. Why, you have to be megum in everything, no +matter how good it is. Milk porridge, or the Bible, or anything. +You can kill yourself on milk porridge if you drink enough. And +you can set down and read the Bible, till you grow to your chair, +and lose your eyesight. + +Now these waters are dretful good, but you have got to use some +megumness with 'em, it stands to reason you have. Taint megum to +drink from 10 to 12 glasses at a time, and mix your drinks goin' +round from spring to spring like a luny. No; get a good doctor +to tell you what minerals you seem to stand in need on the most, +and then try to get 'em with fear and tremblin'. You'll get help +I haint a doubt on't. For they are dretful good for varius +things that afflict the human body. Dretful! + + + + +XVI. + +AT A LAWN PARTY. + + +Wall, the very next mornin' Miss Flamm sent word for Josiah and me +to come that night to a lawn party. And I sez at once, "I must go +and get some lawn." + +Sez Josiah, "What will you do with it?" + +And I sez, "Oh, I s'pose I shall wrap it round me, I'll do what +the rest do." + +And sez Josiah, "Hadn't I ort to have some too? If it is a lawn +party and everybody else has it, I shall feel like a fool without +any lawn." + +And I looked at him in deep thought, and through him into the +causes and consequences of things, and sez I, "I s'pose you do ort +to have a lawn necktie, or handkerchief, or sunthin'." + +Sez he, "How would a vest look made out of it, a kinder sprigged +one, light gay colors on a yaller ground-work?" + +But I sez at once, "You never will go out with me, Josiah, with a +lawn vest on." And I settled it right there on the spot. + +Then he proposed to have some wrapped round his hat, sort a +festooned. But I stood like marble aginst that idee. But I knew +I had got to have some lawn, and pretty soon we sallied out +together and wended our way down to where I should be likely to +find a lawn store. + +And who should we meet a comin' out of a store but Ardelia. Her +3d cousin had sent her over to get a ingregient for cookin'. +Good, willin' little creeter! She walked along with us for a +spell. And while she wuz a walkin' along with us, we come onto a +sight that always looked pitiful to me, the old female that wuz +always a' sittin' there a singin' and playin' on a accordeun. And +it seemed to me that she looked pitifuller and homblier than ever, +as she sot there amongst the dense crowd that mornin' a singin' +and a playin'. Her tone wuz thin, thin as gauze, hombly gause +too. But I wondered to myself how she wuz a feelin' inside of her +own mind, and what voices she heard a speakin' to her own soul, +through them hombly strains. And, ontirely unbeknown to myself, I +fell into a short revery (short but deep) right there in the +street, as I looked down on her, a settin' there so old, and +patient and helpless, amongst the gay movin' throng. + +And I wondered what did she see, a settin' there with her blind +eyes, what did she hear through them hombly tones that she wuz a +singin' day after day to a crowd that wuz indifferent to her, or +despised her? Did she hear the song of the mornin', the spring +time of life? Did the song of a lark come back to her, a lark +flyin' up through the sweet mornin' sky over the doorway of a +home, a lark watched by young eyes, two pairs of 'em, that made +the seein' a blessedness? Did a baby's first sweet blunders of +speech, and happy laughter come back to her, as she sot there a +drawin' out with her wrinkled hands them miserable sounds from the +groanin' instrument? Did home, love, happiness sound out to her, +out of them hombly strains? I'd have gin a cent to know. + +And I'd have gin a cent quick to know if the tread -- tread -- +tread of the crowd goin' past her day after day, hour after hour, +seems to her like the trample of Time a marchin' on. Did she hear +in 'em the footsteps of child, or lover, or friend, a steppin' +away from her, and youth and happiness, and hope, a stiddy goin' +away from her? + +Did she ever listen through the constant sound of them steps, +listen to hear the tread of them feet that she must know wuz a +comin' nigh to her -- the icy feet that will approach us, if their +way leads over rocks or roses? + +Did she hate to hear them steps a comin' nearer to her, or did she +strain her ears to hear 'em, to welcome 'em? I thought like as +not she did. For thinkses I to myself, and couldn't help it, if +she is a Christian she must be glad to change that old accordeun +for a harp of any size or shape. For mournfuller and more +melancholy sounds than her voice and that instrument made I never +hearn, nor ever expect to hear, and thin. + +Poor, old, hombly critter, I gin her quite a lot of change one +day, and she braced up and sung and drawed out faster than ever, +and thinner. Though I'd have gladly hearn her stop. + +When I come up out of my revery, I see Ardelia lookin' at her +stiddy and kind a sot. And I mistrusted trouble wuz ahead on me, +and I hurried Josiah down the street. Ardelia a sayin' she had +got to turn the corner, to go to another place for her 3d cousin. + +Jest as we wuz a crossin' a street my companion drawed my +attention to a sign that wuz jest overhead, and sez lie, "That +means me, I'm spoke of right out, and hung up overhead." + +And sez I, "What do you mean?" + +Sez he, "Read it -- 'The First Man-I-Cure Of The Day.' That's me, +Samantha; I haint a doubt of it. And I s'pose I ort to go in and +be cured. I s'pose probably it will be expected of me, that I +should go in, and let him look at my corns." + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen, I've heerd you talk time and agin aginst big +feelin' folks, and here you be a talkin' it right to yourself, and +callin' yourself the first man of the day." + +"Wall," sez he firmly, "I believe it, and I believe you do, and +you'd own up to it, if you wuzn't so aggravatin'." + +"Wall, sez I mildly, "I do think you are the first in some things, +though what them things are, I would be fur from wantin' to tell +you. But," I continued on, "I don't see you should think that +means you. Saratoga is full of men, and most probable every man +of 'em thinks it means him." + +"Wall," sez he, "I don't think it means me, I know it. And I +s'pose," he continued dreamily, "they'd cure me, and not charge a +cent." + +"Wall," sez I, "wait till another time, Josiah Allen." And jest +at this minute, right down under our feet, we see the word "Pray," +in big letters scraped right out in stun. And Josiah sez, "I +wonder if the dumb fools think anybody is goin to kneel down right +here in the street, and be run over. Why a man would be knocked +over a dozen times, before he got through one prayer, Now I lay me +down to sleep, or anything." + +"Wall," sez I, mildly, "I don't think that would be a very +suitable prayer under the circumstances. It haint expected that +you'd lay down here for a nap -- howsumever," sez I reesunably +"their puttin' the word there shows what good streaks the folks +here have, and I don't want you to make light on't, and if you +don't want to act like a perfect backslider you'll ceese usin' +such profane language on sech a solemn subject." + +Wall, we went into a good lookin'store and I wuz jest a lookin' at +some lawn and a wonderin' how many yards I should want, when who +should come in but Miss Flamm to get a rooch for her neck. + +And she told me that I didn't need any lawn, and that it wuz a +Garden party, and folks dressed in anything they wuz a mind to, +though sez she, "A good many go in full dress." + +"Wall," sez I calmly, "I have got one." And she told me to come +in good season. + +That afternoon, Josiah a bein' out for a walk, I took out of my +trunk a dress that Alminy Hagidon had made for me out of a very +full pattern I had got of a peddler, and wanted it all put in, +so's it would fade all alike, for I mistrusted it wouldn't wash. +It wuz gethered-in full round the waist, and the sleeves wuz set +in full, and the waist wuz kinder full before, and it had a deep +high ruffle gathered-in full round the neck. It wuz a very full +dress, though I haint proud, and never wuz called so. Yet anybody +duz take a modest pleasure in bein' equal to any occasion and +comin' up nobly to a emergency. And I own that I did say to +myself, as I pulled out the gethers in front, "Wall, there may be +full dresses there to-night, but there will be none fuller than +mine." + +And I wuz glad that Alminy had made it jest as she had. She had +made it a little fuller than even I had laid out to have it, for +she mistrusted it would shrink in washin'. It wuz a very full +dress. It wuz cambrick dark chocolate, with a set flower of a +kind of a cinnamon brown and yellow, it wuz bran new and looked +well. + +Wall, I had got it on, and wuz contemplatin' its fullness with +complacency and a hand-glass, a seein' how nobly it stood out +behind, and how full it wuz, when Josiah Allen came in. I had +talked it over with him, before he went out -- and he wuz as +tickled as I wuz, and tickleder, to think I had got jest the right +dress for the occasion. But he sez to me the first thing -- "You +are all wrong, Samantha, full dress means low neck and short +sleeves." + +Sez I, "I know better!" + +Sez he, "It duz." + +Sez I, "Somebody has been a foolin' you, Josiah Allen! There +ain't no sense in it. Do you s'pose folks would call a dress +full, when there wuzn't more'n half a waist and sleeves to it. +I'd try to use a little judgment, Josiah Allen! " + +But he contended that he wuz in the right on't. And he took up +his best vest that lay on the bed, and sot down, and took out his +jack knife and went a rippin' open one of the shoulders, and sez +I, "What are you doin', Josiah Allen?" + +"Why, you can do as you are a mind to, Samantha Allen," sez he. +"But I shall go fashionable, I shall go in full dress." + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen do you look me in the face and say you are a +goin' in a low neck vest, and everything, to that party to-night?" + +"Yes, mom, I be. I am bound to be fashionable." And he went to +rollin' up his shirt sleeves and turnin' in the neck of his shirt, +in a manner that wuz perfectly immodest. + +I turned my head away instinctively, for I felt that my cheek wuz +a gettin' as red as blood, partly through delicacy and partly +through righteous anger. Sez I, "Josiah Allen, be you a +calculatin' to go there right out in public before men and wimmen, +a showin' your bare bosom to a crowd? Where is your modesty, +Josiah Allen? Where is your decency?" + +Sez he firmly, "I keep 'em where all the rest do, who go in full +dress." + +I sot right down in a chair and sez I, "Wall there is one thing +certain; if you go in that condition, you will go alone. Why," +sez I, "to home, if Tirzah Ann, your own daughter, had ketched you +in that perdickerment, a rubbin' on linement or anything, you +would have jumped and covered yourself up, quicker'n a flash, and +likeways me, before Thomas Jefferson. And now you lay out to go +in that way before young girls, and old ones, and men and wimmen, +and want me to foller on after your example. What in the world +are you a thinkin' on, Josiah Allen?" + +"Why I'm a thinkin, on full dress," sez be in a pert tone, a +kinder turnin' himself before the glass, where he could get a good +view of his bones. His thin neck wuzn't much more than bones, +anyway, and so I told him. And I asked him if he could see any +beauty in it, and sez I, "Who wants to look at our old bare necks, +Josiah Allen? And if there wuzn't any other powerful reeson of +modesty and decency in it, you'd ketch your death cold, Josiah +Allen, and be laid up with the newmoan. You know you would," sez +I, "you are actin' like a luny, Josiah Allen." + +"It is you that are actin' like a luny," sez he bitterly. "I +never propose anything of a high fashionable kind but what you +want to break it up. Why, dumb it all, you know as well as I do, +that men haint called as modest as wimmen anyway. And if they +have the name, why shouldn't they have the game? Why shouldn't +they go round half dressed as well as wimmen do? And they are as +strong agin; if there is any danger to health in it they are +better able to stand it. But," sez he, in the same bitter axents, +"you always try to break up all my efforts at high life and +fashion. I presume you won't waltz to-night, nor want me to." + +I groaned several times in spite of myself, and sithed, "Waltz!" +sez I in awful axents. "A classleader! and a grandfather! and +talkin' about waltzin'!" + +Sez Josiah, "Men older than me waltz, and foller it up. Put their +arms right round the prettiest girls in the room, hug 'em, and +swing 'em right round" -- sez he kinder spoony like. + +I said nothin' at them fearful words, only my groans and sithes +became deeper and more voyalent. And in a minute I see through +the fingers with which I had nearly covered my face, that he wuz a +pullin' down his shirt sleeves and a puttin' his jack knife in his +pocket. + +That man loves me. And love sways him round often times when +reesun and sound argument are powerless. Now, the sound reesun of +the case didn't move him, such as the indelicacy of makin' a +exhibition of one's self in a way that would, if displayed in a +heathen, be a call for missionarys to convert 'em, and that makes +men blush when they see it in a Christian woman. + +The sound reason of its bein' the fruitful cause of disease and +death, through the senseless exposure. + +The sound reason of the worse than folly of old and middle-aged +folks thinkin' that the exhibition is a pretty one when it haint. + +The sound reason of its bein' inconsistent for a woman to allow +the familiarity of a man and a stranger, a walkin' up and puttin' +his arm round her, and huggin' her up to him as clost as he can; +that act, that a woman would resent as a deadly insult and her +incensed relatives avenge with the sword, if it occurred in any +other place than the ball-room and at the sound of the fiddle. +The utter inconsistency of her meetin' it with smiles, and making +frantic efforts to get more such affronts than any other woman +present -- her male relatives a lookin' proudly on. + +The inconsistency of a man's bein' not only held guiltless but +applauded for doin' what, if it took place in the street, or +church, would make him outlawed, for where is there a lot of manly +men who would look on calmly, and see a sweet young girl insulted +by a man's ketchin' hold of her and embracin' of her tightly for +half an hour, -- why, he would be turned out of his club and +outlawed from Christian homes if it took place in silence, but yet +the sound of a fiddle makes it all right. + +And I sez to myself mildly, as I sot there, "Is it that men and +wimmen lose their senses, or is there a sacredness in the strains +of that fiddle, that makes immodesty modest, indecency decent, and +immorality moral?" And agin I sithe heavy and gin 3 deep groans. +And I see Josiah gin in. All the sound reasons weighed as nothin' +with him, but 2 or 3 groans, and a few sithes settled the matter. +Truly Love is a mighty conqueror. + +And anon Josiah spoke and sez, "Wall, I s'pose I can gin it all +up, if you feel so about it, but we shall act like fools, +Samantha, and look like 'em." + +Sez I sternly, "Better be fools than naves, Josiah Allen! if we +have got to be one or the other, but we haint. We are a standin' +on firm ground, Josiah Allen," sez I. "The platform made of the +boards of consistency, and common sense, and decency, is one that +will never break down and let you through it, into gulfs and +abysses. And on that platform we will both stand to-night, dear +Josiah." + +I think it is always best when a pardner has gin in and you have +had a triumph of principle, to be bland; blander than common to +him. I always love at such times to round my words to him with a +sweet affectionateness of mean. I love to, and he loves it. + +We sot out in good season for the Garden party. And it wuz indeed +a sight to behold! But I did not at that first minute have a +chance to sense it, for Miss Flamm sent her hired girl out to ask +me to come to her room for a few minutes. Miss Flamm's house is a +undergoin' repairs for a few weeks, sunthin' had gin out in the +water works, so she and her hired girl have been to this tarven +for the time bein'. The hired girl got us some good seats and +tellin' Josiah to keep one on 'em for me, I follered the girl, or +"maid," as Miss Flamm calls her. But good land! if she is a old +maid, I don't see where the young ones be. + +Miss Flamm had sent for me, so she said, to see if I wanted to +ride out the next day, and what time would be the most convenient +to me, and also, to see how I liked her dress. She didn't know as +she should see me down below, in the crowd, and she wanted me to +see it. (Miss Flamm uses me dretful well, but I s'pose 2/3ds of +it, is on Thomas J's account. Some folks think she is goin' to +have another lawsuit, and I am glad enough to have him convey her +lawsuits, for they are good, honerable ones, and she pays him +splendid for carryin' 'em.) + +Wall, she had her skirts all on when I went in, all a foamin' and +a shinin', down onto the carpet, in a glitterin' pile of pink +satin and white lace and posys. Gorgus enough for a princess. + +And I didn't mind it much, bein' only females present, if she wuz +exposin' of herself a good deal. I kinder blushed a little as I +looked at her, and kep' my eyes down on her skirts all I could, +and thinkses I to myself, -- "What if G. Washington should come +in? I shouldn't know which way to look." But then the very next +minute, I says to myself, "Of course he won't be in till she gets +her waist on. I'm a borrowin' trouble for nothin'." + +At last Miss Flamm spoke and says she, as she kinder craned +herself before the glass, a lookin' at her back (most the hull +length on it bare, as I am a livin' creeter); and says she,," How +do you like my dress?" + +"Oh," says I, wantin' to make myself agreeable (both on account of +principle, and the lawsuit), "the skirts are beautiful but I can't +judge how the hull dress looks, you know, till you get your waist +on." + +"My waist?" says she. + +"Yes," says I. + +"I have got it on," says she. + +"Where is it?" says I, a lookin' at her closer through my specks, +"Where is the waist?" + +"Here," says she, a pintin' to a pink belt ribbon, and a string of +beads over each shoulder. + +Says I, "Miss Flamm, do you call that a waist?" + +"Yes," says she, and she balanced herself on her little pink +tottlin' slippers. She couldn't walk in 'em a good honerable walk +to save her life. How could she, with the instep not over two +inches acrost, and the heels right under the middle of her foot, +more'n a finger high? Good land, they wuz enuff to lame a Injun +savage, and curb him in. But she sort o' balanced herself unto +'em, the best she could, and put her hands round her waist -- it +wuzn't much bigger than a pipe-stem, and sort o' bulgin' out both +ways, above and below, some like a string tied tight round a +piller, - and says she complacently, "I don't believe there will +be a dress shown to-night more stylish and beautiful than mine." + +Says I, "Do you tell me, Miss Flamm, that you are a goin' down +into that crowd of promiscus men and women, with nothin' but them +strings on to cover you?" Says I, "Do you tell me that, and you a +perfesser and a Christian?" + +"Yes," says she, "I paid 300 dollars for this dress, and it haint +likely I am goin' to miss the chance of showin' it off to the +other wimmen who will envy me the possession of it. To be sure," +says she, "it is a little lower than Americans usually wear. But +in fashion, as in anything else, somebody has got to go ahead. +This is the very heighth of fashion," says she. + +Says I in witherin' and burnin' skorn, "It is the heighth of +immodesty." + +And I jest turned my back right ont' her, and sailed out of the +room. I wuzn't a a goin' to stand that, lawsuit or no lawsuit. I +wuz all worked up in my mind, and by the side of myself, and I +didn't get over it for some time, neither. + +Wall, I found my companion seated in that comfertable place, and a +keepin' my chair for me, and so I sot down by him, and truly we +sot still, and see the glory, and the magnificence on every side +on us. There wuz 3 piazzas about as long as from our house to +Jonesville, or from Jonesville to Loontown, all filled with folks +magnificently dressed, and a big garden layin' between 'em about +as big as from our house to Miss Gowdey's, and so round crossways +to Alminy Hagidone's brother's, and back agin'. It wuz full as +fur as that, and you know well that that is a great distance. + +There wuz some big noble trees, all twinklin' full of lights, of +every coler, and rows of shinin' lights, criss-crossed every way, +or that is, every beautiful way, from the high ornimental pillers +of the immense house, that loomed up in the distance round us on +every side, same as the mountains loom up round Loontown. + +There wuz a big platform built in the middle of the garden, with +sweet music discoursin' from it the most enchantin' strains. And +the fountains wuz sprayin' out the most beautiful colers you ever +see in your life, and fallin' down in pink, and yellow, and gold, +and green, and amber, and silver water; sparklin' down onto the +green beautiful ferns and flowers that loved to grow round the big +marble basin which shone white, risin' out of the green velvet of +the grass. + +Josiah looked at that water, and sez he, "Samantha, I'd love to +get some of that water to pass round evenin's when we have +company." Sez he, "It would look so dressy and fashionable to +pass round pink water, or light blue, or light yeller. How it +would make Uncle Nate Gowdey open his eyes. I believe I shall buy +some bottles of it, Samantha, to take home. What do you say? I +don't suppose it would cost such a dretful sight, do you?" + +Sez he, "I s'pose all they have to do is to put pumps down into a +pink spring, or a yeller one, as the case may be, and pump. And I +would be willin' to pump it up myself, if it would come cheaper." + +But my companion soon forgot to follow up the theme in lookin' +about him onto the magnificent, seen, and a seein' the throngs of +men and wimmen growin' more and more denser, and every crowd on +'em that swept by us, and round us, and before us, a growin' more +gorgus in dress, or so it seemed to us. Gemms of every gorgus +coler under the heavens and some jest the coler of the heavens +when it is blue and shinin' or when it is purplish dark in the +night time, or when it is full of white fleecy clouds, or when it +is a shinin' with stars. + +Why, one woman had so many diamonds on that she had a detective +follerin' her all round wherever she went. She wuz a blaze of +splendor and so wuz lots of 'em, though like the stars, they +differed from each other in glory. + +But whatever coler their gowns wuz, in one thing they wuz most all +alike -- most all of 'em had waists all drawed in tight, but a +bulgin' out on each side, more or less as the case might be. Why +some of them waists wuzn't much bigger than pipe's tails and so I +told Josiah. + +And he whispered back to me, and sez he, "I wonder if them wimmen +with wasp waists, think that we men like the looks on 'em. They +make a dumb mistake if they do. Why," sez he, "we men know what +they be; we know they are nothin' but crushed bones and flesh." +Sez he, "I could make my own waist look jest like 'em, if I should +take a rope and strap myself down." + +"Wall," sez I, in agitated axents, "don't you try to go into no +such enterprise, Josiah Allen." + +I remembered the eppisode of the afternoon, and I sez in anxins +axents, and affectionate, "Besides not lookin' well, it is +dangerous, awful dangerous. And how I should blush," sez I, "if I +wuz to see you with a leather strap or a rope round your waist +under your coat, a drawin' you in ; a changin' your good honerable +shape. And God made men's and wimmen's waists jest alike in the +first place, and it is jest as smart for men to deform themselves +in that way as it is for wimmen. But oh, the agony of my soul if +I should see you a tryin' to disfigure yourself in that way." + +"You needn't be afraid, Samantha," sez he, "I am dressy, and +always wuz, but I haint such a fool as that, as to kill myself in +perfect agony, for fashion." + +I didn't say nothin' but instinctively I looked down at his feet, +"Oh, you needn't look at my feet, Samantha, feet are very +different from the heart, and lungs, and such. You can squeeze +your feet down, and not hurt much moren the flesh and bones. But +you are a destroyin' the very seat of life when you draw your +waist in as them wimmen do." + +"I know it," sez I, "but I wouldn't torture myself in any way if I +wuz in your place." + +"I don't lay out to," sez he. "I haint a goin' to wear corsets, +it haint at all probable I shall, though I am better able to stand +it, than wimmen be." + +"I know that," sez I. "I know men are stronger and better able to +bear the strain of bein' drawed in and tapered." I am reesonable, +and will ever speak truthful and honest, and this I couldn't deny +and didn't try to. + +"Wall, dumb it, what makes men stronger?" sez he. + +"Why," sez I, "I s'pose one great thing is their dressin' +comfortable." + +"Wall, I am glad you know enough to know it," sez he. "Why," sez +he, "jest imagine a man tyin' a rope round his waist, round and +round; or worse yet, take strong steel, and whalebones, and bind +and choke himself down with 'em, and tottlin' himself up on high +heel slippers, the high heels comin' right up in the ball of his +foot -- and then havin' heavy skirts a holdin' him down, tied back +tight round his knees and draggin' along on the ground at his feet +-- imagine me in that perdickerment, Samantha." + +I shuddered, and sez I, "Don't bring up no such seen to harrow up +my nerve." Sez I, "You know I couldn't stand it, to see you a +facin' life and its solemn responsibilities in that condition. It +would kill me to witness your sufferin'," sez I. And agin' I +shuddered, and agin I sithed. + +And he sez, "Wall, it is jest as reasonable for a man to do it as +for a woman; it is far worse and more dangerous for a woman than a +man." + +"I know it," sez I, between my sithes. "I know it, but I can't, I +can't stand it, to have you go into it." + +"Wall, you needn't worry, Samantha, I haint a fool. You won't +ketch men a goin' into any such performances as this, they know +too much." And then he resumed on in a lighter agent, to get my +mind still further off from his danger, for I wuz still a sithin', +frequent and deep. + +Sez he, as he looked down and see some wimmen a passin' below; sez +hey "I never see such a sight in my life, a man can see more here +in one evenin' than he can in a life time at Jonesville." + +"That is so, Josiah," sez I, "you can." And I felt every word I +said, for at that very minute a lady, or rather a female woman, +passed with a dress on so low in the neck that I instinctively +turned away my head, and when I looked round agin, a deep blush +wuz mantlin' the cheeks of Josiah Allen, a flushin' up his face, +clear up into his bald head. + +I don't believe I had ever been prouder of Josiah Allen, than I +wuz at that minute. That blush spoke plainer than words could, of +the purity and soundness of my pardner's morals. If the whole +nation had stood up in front of me at that time, and told me his +morals wuz a tottlin' I would have scorned the suggestion. No, +that blush telegraphed to me right from his soul, the sweet +tidin's of his modesty and worth. + +And I couldn't refrain from sayin' in encouragin', happy axents, +"Haint you glad now, Josiah Allen, that you listened to your +pardner; haint you glad that you haint a goin' round in a low +necked coat and vest, a callin' up the blush of skern and outraged +modesty to the cheeks 'of noble and modest men?" + +"Yes," sez he, graspin' holt of my hand in the warmth of his +gratitude, for he see what I had kep' him from. "Yes, you wuz in +the right on't, Samantha. I see the awfulness of the peril from +which you rescued of me. But never," sez he, a lookin' down +agin over the railin', onto some more wimmen a passin' beneath, +"never did I see what I have seen here to-night. Not," sez he +dreemily, "sense I wuz a baby." + +"Wall," sez I, "don't try to look, Josiah; turn your eyes away." + +And I believe he did try to -- though such is the fascination of a +known danger in front of you, that it is hard to keep yourself +from contemplatin' of it. But he tried to. And he tried to not +look at the waltzin' no more than he could help, and I did too. +But in spite of himself he had to see how clost the young girls +wuz held; how warmly the young men embraced 'em. And as he looked +on, agin I see the hot blush of shame mantillied Josiah's cheeks, +and again he sez to me in almost warm axents, "I realize what you +have rescued me from, Samantha." + +And I sez, "You couldn't have looked Elder Minkley in the face, +could you? if you had gone into that shameful diversion." + +"No, I couldn't, nor into yourn nuther. I couldn't have looked +nobody in the face, if I had gone on and imposed on any young girl +as they are a doin', and insulted of her. Why," sez he, "if it +wuz my Tirzah Ann that them, men wuz a embracin', and huggin', and +switchin' her round, as if they didn't have no respect for her at +all, -- why, if it wuz Tirzah Ann, I would tear 'em 'em from lim." + +And he looked capable on't. He looked almost sublime (though +small). And I hurried him away from the seen, for I didn't know +what would ensue and foller on, if I let him linger there longer. +He looked as firm and warlike as one of our bantam fowls, a male +one, when hawks are a hoverin' over the females of the flock. And +when I say Bantam I say it with no disrespect to Josiah Allen. +Bantams are noble, and warlike fowls, though small boneded. + +I got one more glimps of Miss Flamm jest as we left the tarven. +She wuz a standin' up in the parlor, with a tall man a standin' up +in front of her a talkin'. He seemed to be biddin' of her +good-bye, for he had holt of her hand, and be wuz a sayin' as we +went by 'em, sez he, "I am sorry not to see more of you." + +"Good land!" thinkses I, "what can the man be a thinkin' on? the +mean, miserable creeter! If there wuz ever a deadly insult gin to +a woman, then wuz the time it wuz gin. Good land! good land!" + +I don't know whether Miss Flamm resented it, or not, for I hurried +Josiah along. I didn't want to expose him to no sich sights, +good, innocent old creeter. So I kep' him up on a pretty good jog +till I got him home. + + + + +XVII. + +A TRIP TO SCHUYLERVILLE. + + +It wuz a lovely mornin' when my companion and me sot out to visit +Schuylerville to see the monument that is stood up there in honor +of the Battle of Saratoga, one of 7 great decisive battles of the +world. + +Wall, the cars rolled on peacefully, though screechin' occasionally, +for, as the poet says, "It is their nater to," and rolled us away +from Saratoga. And at first there wuzn't nothin' particularly +insperin' in the looks of the landscape, or ruther woodscape. It +wuz mostly woods and rather hombly woods too, kinder flat lookin'. +But pretty soon the scenery became beautiful and impressive. The +rollin' hills rolled down and up in great billowy masses of green +and pale blue, accordin' as they wuz fur or near, and we went by +shinin' water, and a glowin' landscape, and pretty houses, and +fields of grain and corn, etc., etc. And anon we reached a place +where "Victory Mills" wuz printed up high, in big letters. When +Josiah see this, he sez, "Haint that neighborly and friendly in +Victory to come over here and put up a mill? That shows, Samantha," +sez he, "that the old hardness of the Revolution is entirely done +away with." + +He wuz jest full of Revolutionary thoughts that mornin', Josiah +Allen wuz. And so wuz I too, but my strength of mind is such, +that I reined 'em in and didn't let 'em run away with me. And I +told him that it didn't mean that. Sez I, "The Widder Albert +wouldn't come over here and go to millin', she nor none of her +family." + +"But," sez he, "the name must mean sunthin'. Do you s'pose it is +where folks get the victory over things? If it is, I'd give a +dollar bill to get a grist ground out here, and," sez he, in a +sort of a coaxin' tone, "le's stop and get some victory, Samantha." + +And I told him, that I guessed when he got a victory over the +world, the flesh, or the -- David, he would have to work for it, +he wouldn't get it ground out for him. But anon, he cast his eyes +on sunthin' else and so forgot to muse on this any further. It +wuz a fair seen. + +Anon, a big manufactory, as big as the hull side of Jonesville +almost, loomed up by the side of us. And anon, the fair, the +beautiful country spread itself out before our vision. While fur, +fur away the pale blue mountains peeked up over the green ones, to +see if they too could see the monument riz up to our National +Liberty. It belonged to them, jest as much as to the hill it wuz +a standin' on, it belongs to the hull liberty-lovin' world. + +Wall, the cars stopped in a pretty little village, a clean, +pleasant little place as I ever see, or want to see. And Josiah +and me wended our way up the broad roomy street, up to where the +monument seemed to sort a beegon to us to come. And when we got +up to it; we see it wuz a sight, a sight to behold. + +The curius thing on't wuz, it kep a growin' bigger and bigger all +the time we wuz approachin' it, till, as we stood at its base, it +seemed to tower up into the very skies. + +There wuz some flights of stun steps a leadin' up to some doors in +the side on't. And we went inside on't after we had gin a good +look at the outside. But it took us some time to get through +gazin' at the outside on't. + +Way up over our heads wuz some sort a recesses, some like the +recess in my spare bed-room, only higher and narrower, and kinder +nobler lookin'. And standin' up in the first one, a lookin' +stiddy through storm and shine at the North star, stood General +Gates, bigger than life considerable, but none too big; for his +deeds and the deeds of all of our old 4 fathers stand out now and +seem a good deal bigger than life. Yes, take 'em in all their +consequences, a sight bigger. + +Wall, there he stands, a leanin' on his sword. He'll be ready +when the enemy comes, no danger but what he will. + +On the east side, is General Schuyler a horsback, ready to dash +forward against the foe, impetuous, ardent, gallant. But oh! the +perils and dangers that obstruct his pathway; thick underbrush and +high, tall trees stand up round him that he seemin'ly can't get +through. + +But his gallant soldiers are a helpin' him onward, they are a +cuttin' down the trees so's he can get through 'em and dash at the +enemy. You see as you look on him that he will get through it +all. No envy, nor detraction, nor jealousy, no such low +underbrush full of crawlin' reptiles, nor no high solid trees, no +danger of any sort can keep him back. His big brave, generous +heart is sot on helpin' his country, he'll do it. + +On the south side, is the saddest sight that a patriotic American +can see. On a plain slab stun, lookin' a good deal like a +permanent grave-stun, sot up high there, for Americans to weep +over forever, bitter tears of shames, is the name, "Arnold." + +He wuz a brave soldier; his name ort to be there; it is all right +to have it there and jest where it is, on a gravestun. All +through the centuries it will stand there, a name carved by the +hand of cupidity, selfishness, and treachery. + +On the west side, General Morgan is standin' up with his hands +over his eyes; lookin' away into the sunset. He looked jest like +that when he wuz a lookin' after prowlin' red skins and red coats; +when the sun wuz under dark clouds, and the day wuz dark 100 years +ago. + +But now, all he has to do is to stand up there and look off into +the glowin' heavens, a watchin' the golden light of the sun of +Liberty a rollin' on westward. He holds his hand over his eyes; +its rays most blind him, he is most lost a thinkin' how fur, how +fur them rays are a spreadin', and a glowin',way, way off, Morgan +is a lookin' onto our future, and it dazzles him. Its rays +stretch off into other lands; they strike dark places; they burn! +they glow! they shine! they light up the world! + +Hold up your head, brave old General, and your loyal steadfast +eyes. You helped to strike that light. Its radience half-frights +you. It is so heavenly bright, its rays, may well dazzle you. +Brown old soldiers, I love to think of you always a standin' up +there, lifted high up by a grateful Nation, a lookin' off over all +the world, a lookin' off towards the glowin' west, toward our +glorious future. + +On the inside too, it wuz a noble seen. After you rose up the +steps and went inside, you found yourself in a middlin' big room +all surrounded by figures in what they called Alto Relief, or +sunthin' to that effect. I don't know what Alto they meant. I +don't know nobody by that name, nor I don't know how they relieved +him. But I s'pose Alto when he wuz there wuz relieved to think +that the figures wuz all so noble and impressive. Mebby he had +been afraid they wouldn't suit him and the nation. But they did, +they must have. He must have been hard to suit, Alto must, if he +wuzn't relieved, and pleased with these. + +On one side wuz George the 3d of England, in his magnificent +palace, all dressed up in velvet and lace, surrounded by his slick +drestup nobles, and all of 'em a sittin' there soft and warm, in +the lap of Luxury, a makin' laws to bind the strugglin' colonies. + +And right acrost from that, wuz a picture of them Colonists, cold +and hungry, a havin' a Rally for Freedom, and a settin' up a Town +meetin! right amongst the trees, and under-brush that hedged 'em +all in and tripped 'em up at every step; and savages a hidin' +behind the trees, and fears of old England, and dread of a +hazerdous unknown future, a hantin' and cloudin' every glimpse of +sky that came down on 'em through the trees. But they looked +earnest and good, them old 4 fathers did, and the Town meetin' +looked determined, and firm principled as ever a Town meetin' +looked on the face of the earth. + +Then there wuz some of the women of the court, fine ladies, all +silk, and ribbons, and embroideries, and paint, and powder, a +leanin' back in their cushioned arm-chairs, a wantin' to have the +colonies taxed still further so's to have more money to buy lace +with and artificial flowers. And right acrost from 'em wuz some +of our old 4 mothers, in a rude, log hut, not strong enough to +keep out the cold, or the Injuns. + +One wuz a cardin' wools, one of 'em wuz a spinnin' 'em, a tryin' +to make clothes to cover the starved, half-naked old 4 fathers who +wuz a tramplin' round in the snow with bare feet and shiverin' +lims. And one of 'em had a gun in her hand. She had smuggled the +children all in behind her and she wuz a lookin' out for the foe. +These wimmen hadn't no ribbons on, no, fur from it. + +And then there wuz General Schuyler a fellin' trees to obstruct +the march of the British army. And Miss Schuyler a settin' fire +to a field of wheat rather than have it help the enemy of her +country. Brave old 4 mother, worthy pardner of a grand man, she +wuz a takin' her life in her hand and a destroyin' her own +property for the sake of the cause she loved. A emblem of the way +men and women sot fire to their own hopes, their own happiness, +and burnt 'em up on the altar of the land we love. + +And there wuz some British wimmen a follerin' their husbands +through the perils of danger and death, likely old 4 mothers they +wuz, and thought jest as much of their pardners as I do of my +Josiah. I could see that plain. And could see it a shinin' +still plainer in another one of the pictures -- Lady Aukland a +goin' over the Hudson in a little canoe with the waves a dashin' +up high round her, to get to the sick bed of her companion. The +white flag of truce wuz a wavin' over her head and in her heart +wuz a shinin' the clear white light of a woman's deathless +devotion. Oh! there wuz likely wimmen amongst the British, I +haint a doubt of it, and men too. + +And then we clim a long flight of stairs and we see some more +pictures, all round that room. Alto relieved agin, or he must +have been relieved, and happified to see 'em, they wuz so +impressive. I myself had from 25 to 30 emotions a minute while I +stood a lookin' at em -- big lofty emotions too. + +There waz Jennie McCrea a bein' dragged offen her horse, and +killed by savages. A dreadful sight -- a woman settin' out +light-hearted toward happiness and goin' to meet a fearful doom. +Dreadful sight that has come down through the centuries, and +happens over and over agin amongst female wimmen. But here it wuz +fearful impressive for the savages that destroyed her wuz in +livin' form, they haint always materialized. + +Yes, it wuz a awful seen. And jest beyond it, wuz Burgoyne a +scoldin' the savages for the cruelty of the deed. Curius, haint +it? How the acts and deeds of a man that he sets to goin', when +they have come to full fruition skare him most to death, horrify +him by the sight. I'll bet Burgoyne felt bad enough, a lookin' on +her dead body, if it wuz his doin's in the first place, in lettin' +loose such ignerance and savagery onto a strugglin' people. + +Yes, Mr. Burgoyne felt bad and ashamed, I haint a doubt of it. +His poet soul could suffer as well as enjoy -- and then I didn't +feel like sayin' too much aginst Mr. Burgoyne, havin' meditated so +lately in the treachery of Arnold, one of our own men doin' a act +that ort to keep us sort a humble-minded to this day. + +And then there wuz the killin' and buryin' of Frazier both +impressive. He wuz a gallant officer and a brave man. And then +there wuz General Schuyler (a good creeter) a turnin' over his +command to Gates. And I methought to myself as I looked on it, +that human nater wuz jest about the same then; it capered jest +about as it duz now in public affairs and offices. Then there wuz +the surrender of Burgoyne to Gates. A sight impressive enough to +furnish one with stiddy emotions for weeks and weeks. A thinkin' +of all he surrendered to him that day, and all that wuz took. + +The monument is dretful high. Up, up, up, it soars as if it wuz +bound to reach up into the very heavens, and carry up there these +idees of ourn about Free Rights, and National Liberty. It don't +go clear up, though. I wish it did. If it had, I should have +gone up the high ladder clear to the top. But I desisted from the +enterprise for 2 reasons, one wuz, that it didn't go, as I say, +clear up, and the other wuz that the stairs wuzn't finished. + +Josiah proposed that he should go up as he clim up our well, with +one foot on each side on't. He said he wuz tempted to, for he +wanted dretfully to look out of them windows on the top. And he +said it would probable be expected of him. And I told him that I +guessed that the monument wouldn't feel hurt if he didn't go up; I +guessed it would stand it. I discouraged the enterprise. + +And anon we went down out of the monument, and crossed over to the +good-lookin' house where the man lives who takes care of the +monument, and shows off its good traits, a kind of a guardian to +it. And we got a first-rate dinner there, though such is not +their practice. And then he took us in a likely buggy with 2 +seats, and a horse to draw it, and we sot out to see what the +march of 100 years has left us of the doin's of them days. + +Time has trampled out a good many of 'em, but we found some. We +found the old Schuyler mansion, a settin' back amongst the trees, +with the old knocker on it, that had been pulled by so many a old +4 father, carryin' tidin's of disappointment, and hope, and +triumph, and encouragement, and everything. We went over the +threshold wore down by the steps that had fell there for a hundred +years, some light, some heavy steps. + +We went into the clean, good-lookin' old kitchen, with the +platters, and shinin' dressers and trays; the old-fashioned +settee, half-table and half-seat. And we see the cup General +Washington drinked tea out of, good old creeter. I hope the water +biled and it wuz good tea, and most probable it wuz. And we see +lots of arms that had been carried in the war, and cannon balls, +and shells, and tommy-hawks, and hatchets, and arrows, and etc., +etc. And down in one room all full of other curiosities and +relicts, wuz the skull of a traitor. I should judge from the +looks on't that besides bein' mean, he wuz a hombly man. Somebody +said folks had made efforts to steal it. But Josiah whispered to +me, that there wuzn't no danger from him, for he would rather be +shet right up in the Tombs than to own it, in any way. + +And I felt some like him. Some of his teeth had been stole, so +they said. Good land! what did they want with his teeth! But it +wuz a dretful interestin' spot. And I thought as I went through +the big square, roomy rooms that I wouldn't swap this good old +house for dozens of Queen Anns, or any other of the fashionable, +furbelowed houses of to-day. The orniments of this house wuz more +on the inside, and I couldn't help thinkin' that this house, +compared with the modern ornimental cottages, wuz a good deal like +one of our good old-fashioned foremothers in her plain gown, +compared with some of the grandma's of to-day, all paint, and +furbelows, and false hair. + +The old 4 mothers orniments wuz on the inside, and the others wuz +more up on the roof, scalloped off and gingerbreaded, and +criss-crossed. + +The old house wuz full of rooms fixed off beautiful. It wuz quite +a treat to walk throngh'em. But the old fireplaces, and mantle +tray shelves spoke to our hearts of the generations that had poked +them fires, and leaned up against them mantle trays. They went +ahead on us through the old rooms; I couldn't see 'em, but I felt +their presence, as I follered 'em over the old thresholts their +feet had worn down a hundred years ago. Their feet didn't make no +sound, their petticoats and short gowns didn't rustle against the +old door ways and stair cases. + +The dear old grandpas in their embroidered coats, didn't cast no +shadow as they crossed the sunshine that came in through the +old-fashioned window panes. No, but with my mind's eye (the best +eye I have got, and one that don't wear specks) I see 'em, and I +follerd 'em down the narrow, steep stair case, and out into the +broad light of 4 P. M., 1886. + +Anon, or shortly after, we drove up on a corner of the street jest +above where the Fish creek empties into the Hudson, and there, +right on a tall high brick block, wuz a tablet, showin' that a +tree once stood jest there, under which Burgoyne surrendered. And +agin, when I thought of all that he surrendered that day, and all +that America and the world gained, my emotions riz up so powerful, +that they wuzn't quelled down a mite, by seein' right on the other +side of the house wrote down these words, "Drugs, Oils, etc." + +No, oil couldn't smooth 'em down, nor drugs drug 'em; they wuz too +powerful. And they lasted jest as soarin' and eloquent as ever +till we turned down a cross street, and arrove at the place, jest +the identical spot where the British stacked their arms (and +stacked all their pride, and their ambitious hopes with 'em). It +made a high pile. + +Wall, from there we went up to a house on a hill, where poor +Baroness Riedesel hid with her three little children, amongst the +wounded and dyin' officers of the British army, and stayed there +three days and three nights, while shots and shells wuz a +bombardin' the little house -- and not knowin' but some of the +shots had gone through her lover husband's heart, before they +struck the low ruff over her head. + +What do you s'pose she wuz a thinkin' on as she lay hid in that +suller all them three days and three nights with her little girls' +heads in her lap? Jest the same thoughts that a mother thinks +to-day, as she cowers down with the children she loves, to hide +from danger; jest the same thoughts that a wife thinks today when +her heart is out a facing danger and death, with the man she +loves. + +She faced danger, and died a hundred deaths in the thought of the +danger to them she loved. I see the very splinters that the cruel +shells and cannon balls split and tore right over her head. Good +honorable splinters and not skairful to look at today, but hard, +and piercin', and harrowin' through them days and nights. + +Time has trampled over that calash she rode round so much in (I +wish I could a seen it); but Time has ground it down into dust. +Time's hand, quiet but heavy, rested down on the shinin' heads of +the three little girls, and their Pa and Ma, and pushed 'em gently +but firmly down out of sight; and all of them savages who used to +follow that calash as it rolled onwards, and all their canoes, and +war hoops, and snowshoes, etc., etc. + +Yes, that calash of Miss Riedesel has rolled away, rolled away +years ago, carryin' the three little girls, their Pa and Ma and +all the fears, and hopes, and dreads, and joys, and heartaches of +that time it has rolled on with 'em all; on, on, down the dusty +road of Oblivion, -- it has disappeared there round the turn of +road, and a cloud of dust comes up into our faces, as we try to +follow it. And the Injuns that used to howl round it, have all +follered on the trail of that calash, and gone on, on, out of +sight. Their canoes have drifted away down the blue Hudson, away +off into the mist and the shadows. Curius, haint it? + +And there the same hills and valleys lay, calm and placid, there +is the same blue sparklin' Hudson. Dretful curius, and sort a +heart breakin' to think on't -- haint it? Only jest a few more +years and we, too, shall go round the turn of the road, out of +sight, out of sight, and a cloud of dust will come up and hide us +from the faces of them that love us, and them, too, from the eyes +of a newer people. + +All our hopes, all our ambitious, all our loves, our joys, our +sorrows, -- all, all will be rolled away or floated away down the +river, and the ripples will ripple on jest as happy; the Sunshine +will kiss the hills jest as warmly, and lovin'ly; but other eyes +will look on 'em, other hearts will throb and burn within 'em at +the sight. + +Kinder sad to think on, haint it? + + + + +XVIII. + +THE SOCIAL SCIENCE MEETING. + + +One day Josiah and me went into a meetin' where they wuz kinder +fixin' over the world, sort a repairin' of it, as you may say. +Some of the deepest, smartest speeches I ever hearn in my life, I +hearn there. + +You know it is a middlin' deep subject. But they rose to it. +They rose nobly to it. Some wuz for repairin' it one way, and +some another -- some wanted to kinder tinker it up, and make it +over like. Some wanted to tear it to pieces, and build it over +new. But they all meant well by the world, and nobody could help +respectin' 'em. + +I enjoyed them hours there with 'em, jest about as well as it is +in my power to enjoy anything. They wuz all on 'em civilized +Christian folks and philanthropists of different shades and +degrees, all but one. There wuz one heathen there. A Hindoo +right from Hindoostan, and I felt kinder sorry for him. A +heathen sot right in the midst of them folks of refinement, and +culture, who had spent their hull lives a tryin' to fix over the +world, and make it good. + +This poor little heathen, with a white piller case, or sunthin' +wound round his head (I s'pose he hadn't money to buy a hat), and +his small black eyes lookin' out kinder side ways from his dark +hombly little face, rousted up my pity, and my sympathy. There +had been quite a firm speech made against allowin' foreigners on +our shores. And this little heathen, in his broken speech, said, +It all seemed so funny to him, when everybody wuz foreigners in +this country, to think that them that got here first should say +they owned it, and send everybody else back. And he said, It +seemed funny to him, that the missionarys we sent over to his +land to teach them the truth, told them all about this land of +Liberty, where everybody wuz free, and everybody could earn a +home for themselves, and urged 'em all to come over here, and +then when they broke away from all that held 'em in their own +land, and came thousands and thousands of milds, to get to this +land of freedom and religion,then they wuz sent back agin, and +wuzn't allowed to land. It seemed so funny. + +And so it did to me. And I said to myself, I wonder if they +don't lose all faith in the missionarys, and what they tell them. +I wonder if they don't have doubts about the other free country +they tell 'em about. The other home they have urged 'em to prepare +for, and go to. I wonder if they haint afraid, that when they +have left their own country and sailed away for that home of +Everlastin' freedom, they will be sent back agin, and not allowed +to land. + +But it comferted me quite a good deal to meditate on't, that that +land didn't have no laws aginst foreign emigration. That its +ruler wuz one who held the rights of the lowest, and poorest, and +most ignerent of His children, of jest as much account as he did +the rights of a king. Thinkses I that poor little head with the +piller case on it will be jest as much looked up to, as if it wuz +white and had a crown on it. And I felt real glad to think it +wuz so. + +But I went to every meetin' of 'em, and enjoyed every one of 'em +with a deep enjoyment. And I said then, and I say now, for folks +that had took such a hefty job as they had, they done well, nobody +could do better, and if the world wuzn't improved by their talk it +wuz the fault of the world, and not their'n. + +And we went to meetin' on Sunday mornin' and night, and hearn +good sermons. There's several high big churches at Saratoga, of +every denomination, and likely folks belong to the hull on 'em: +There is no danger of folks losin' their way to Heaven unless +they want to, and they can go on their own favorite paths too, be +they blue Presbyterian paths, or Methodist pasters, or by the +Baptist boat, or the Episcopalian high way, or the Catholic +covered way, or the Unitarian Broadway, or the Shadow road of +Spiritualism. + +No danger of their losin' their way unless they want to. And I +thought to myself as I looked pensively at the different steeples, +"What though there might be a good deal of'wranglin', and screechin', +and puffin' off steam, at the different stations, as there must +always be where so many different routes are a layin' side by side, +each with its own different runners, and conductors, and porters, +and managers, and blowers, still it must be, that the separate +high ways would all end at last in a serener road, where the true +wayfarers and the earnest pilgrims would all walk side by side, and +forget the very name of the station they sot out from. + +I sez as much to my companion, as we wended our way home from one +of the meetin's, and he sez, "There haint but one right way, and +it is a pity folks can't see it." Sez he a sithin' deep, "Why +can't everybody be Methodists?" + +We wuz a goin' by the 'Piscopal church then, and he sez a lookin' +at it, as if he wuz sorry for it, "What a pity that such likely +folks as they be, should believe in such eronious doctrines. +Why," sez he, "I have hearn that they believe that the bread at +communion is changed into sunthin' else. What a pity that they +should believe anything so strange as that is, when there is a +good, plain, practical, Christian belief that they might believe +in, when they might be Methodists. And the Baptists now," sez +he, a glancin' back at their steeple, "why can't they believe +that a drop is as good as a fountain? Why do they want to +believe in so much water? There haint no need on't. They might +be Methodists jest as well as not, and be somebody." + +And he walked along pensively and in deep thought, and I a feelin' +somewhat tuckered didn't argue with him, and silence rained about +us till we got in front of the hall where the Spiritualists hold +their meetin's, and we met a few a comin' out on it and then he +broke out and acted mad, awful mad and skernful, and sez he +angrily, "Them dumb fools believe in supernatural things. They +don't have a shadow of reason or common sense to stand on. A man +is a fool to gin the least attention to them, or their doin's. Why +can't they believe sunthin' sensible? Why can't they jine a church +that don't have anything curius in it? Nothin' but plain, common +sense facts in it: Why can't they be Methodists?" + +"The idee!" sez he, a breakin' out fresh. "The idee of believin' +that folks that have gone to the other world can come back agin +and appear. Shaw!" sez he, dretful loud and bold. I don't believe +I ever heard a louder shaw in my life than that wuz, or more kinder +haughty and highheaded. + +And then I spoke up, and sez, "Josiah, it is always well, to shaw +in the right place, and I am afraid you haint studied on it as +much as you ort. I am afraid you haint a shawin' where you ort +to." + +"Where should I shaw?" sez he, kinder snappish. + +"Wall," sez I, "when you condemn other folkses beliefs, you ort +to be careful that you haint a condemin' your own belief at the +same time. Now my belief is grounded in the Methodist meetin' +house like a rock; my faith has cast its ancher there inside of +her beliefs and can't be washed round by any waves of opposin' +doctrines. But I am one who can't now, nor never could, abide +bigotry and intolerance either in a Pope, or a Josiah Allen. + +"And when you condemn a belief simply on the ground of its bein' +miraculous and beyond your comprehension, Josiah Allen, you had +better pause and consider on what the Methodist faith is founded. + +"All our orthodox meetin' houses, Presbyterian, Baptist, Methodist, +Episcopalian, every one on 'em, Josiah Allen, are sot down on a +belief, a deathless faith in a miraculous birth, a life of +supernatural events, the resurrection of the dead, His appearance +after death, a belief in the graves openin' and the dead comin' +forth, a belief in three persons inhabitin' one soul, the constant +presence and control of spiritual influences, the Holy Ghost, and +the spirits of just men. And while you are a leanin' up against +that belief, Josiah Allen, and a leanin' heavy, don't shaw at any +other belief for the qualities you hold sacred in your own." + +He quailed a very little, and I went on. + +"If you want to shaw at it, shaw for sunthin' else in it, or else +let it entirely alone. If you think it lacks active Christian +force, if you think it is not aggressive in its assaults at Sin, +if you think it lacks faith in the Divine Head of the church, say +so, do; but for mercy's sake try to shaw in the right place." + +"Wall," sez he, "they are a low set that follers it up mostly, +and you know it." And his head was right up in the air, and he +looked very skernful. + +But I sez, "Josiah Allen, you are a shawin' agin in the wrong +place," sez I. "If what you say is true, remember that 1800 +years ago, the same cry wuz riz up by Pharisees, `He eats with +Publicans and sinners.' They would not have a king who came in +the guise of the poor, they scerned a spiritual truth that did +not sparkle with worldly lustre. + +"But it shone on; it lights the souls of humanity to-day. Let us +not be afraid, Josiah Allen. Truth is a jewel that cannot be +harmed by deepest investigation, by roughest handlin'. It can't +be buried, it will shine out of the deepest darkness. What is +false will be washed away, what is true will remain. For all +this frettin', and chafing, all this turbelence of conflectin' +beliefs, opposin' wills, will only polish this jewel. Truth, +calm and serene, will endure, will shine, will light up the +world." + +He begun to look considerable softer in mean, and I continued +on: "Josiah Allen, you and I know what we believe the beautiful +religion (Methodist Episcopal) that we both love, makes a light +in our two souls. But don't let us stand in that light and yell +out, that everybody else's light is darkness; that our light is +the only one. No, the heavens are over all the earth; the twelve +gates of heaven are open and a shinin' down on all sides of us. + +"Jonesville meetin' house (Methodist Episcopal) haint the only +medium through which the light streams. It is dear to us, Josiah +Allen, but let us not think that we must coller everybody and +drag 'em into it. And let us not cry out too much at other +folkses superstitions, when the rock of our own faith, that +comforts us in joy and sorrow, is sot in a sea of supernaturalism. + +"You know how that faith comforts our two souls, how it is to us, +like the shadow of a great rock in a weary land, but they say, +their belief is the same to them, let us not judge them too +hardly. No, the twelve gates of heaven are open, Josiah Allen, +and a shinin' down onto the earth. We know the light that has +streamed into our own souls, but we do not know exactly what rays +of radience may have been reflected down into some other lives +through some one of those many gates. + +"The plate below has to be prepared, before it can ketch the +picture and hold it. The light does not strike back the same +reflection from every earthly thing. The serene lake mirrors +back the light, in a calm flood of glory, the flashin' waterfall +breaks it into a thousand dazzlin' sparkles. The dewy petal of +the yellow field lily, reflects its own ray of golden light back, +so does the dark cone of the pine tree, and the diamond, the +opal, the ruby, each tinges the light with its own coloring, but +the light is all from above. And they all reflect the light, in +their own way for which the Divine skill has prepared them. + +"Let us not try to compel the deep blue Ocean waves and the +shinin' waterfall, and the lily blow, to reflect back the light, +in the same identical manner. No, let the light stream down into +high places, and low ones, let the truth shine into dark hearts, +and into pure souls. God is light. God is Love. It is His +light that shines down out of the twelve gates, and though the +ruby, or the amethyst, may color it by their own medium, the +light that is reflected, back is the light of Heaven. And Josiah +Allen," sez I in a deeper, earnester tone, "let us who know so +little ourselves, be patient with other ignerent ones. Let us +not be too intolerent, for no intolerence, Josiah Allen is so +cruel as that of ignerence, an' stupidity." + +Sez Josiah, "I won't believe in anything I can't see, Samantha +Allen." + +I jest looked round at him witheringly, and sez I, "What have +you ever seen, Josiah Allen, I mean that is worth sein'? Haint +everything that is worth havin' in life, amongst the unseen? The +deathless loves, the aspirations, the deep hopes, and faiths, +that live in us and through us, and animate us and keep us alive, +-- Whose spectacles has ever seen 'em? What are we, all of us +human creeters, any way, but little atoms dropped here, Heaven +knows why, or how, into the midst of a perfect sea of mystery, +and unseen influences. What hand shoved us forwards out of the +shadows, and what hand will reach out to us from the shadows and +draw us back agin? Have you seen it Josiah Allen? You have felt +this great onseen force a movin' you along, but you haint sot +your eyes on it. + +"What is there above us, below us, about us, but a waste of +mystery, a power of onseen influences?. + +"You won't believe anything you can't see: -- Did you ever see +old Gravity, Josiah Allen, or get acquainted with him? Yet his +hands hold the worlds together. Who ever see the mysterious +sunthin' in the North that draws the ship's compass round? Who +ever see that great mysterious hand that is dropped down in the +water, sweepin' it back and forth, makin' the tides come in, and +the tides go out? Who ever has ketched a glimpse of them majestic +fingers, Josiah Allen? Or the lips touched with lightnin', whose +whispers reach round the world, and through the Ocean? You haint +see 'em, nor I haint, No, Josiah Allen, we don't know much of +anything, and we don't know that for certain. We are all on us +only poor pupils down in the Earth's school-room, learnin' with + difficulty and heart ache the lessons God sets for us. + +Tough old Experience gives us many a hard floggin', before we +learn the day's lessons. And we find the benches hard, long +before sundown. And it makes our hearts ache to see the mates we +love droop their too tired heads in sleep, all round us before +school is out. But we grind on at our lessons, as best we may. +Learnin' a little maybe. Havin' to onlearn a sight, as the +pinters move on towards four. Clasping hands with fellow toilers +and (hard task) onclaspin' 'em, as they go up above us, or down +nearer the foot. Havin' little `intermissions' of enjoyment, +soon over. But we plod on, on, and bimeby -- and sometimes we +think we do not care how soon -- the teacher will say to us, that +we can be 'dismissed.' And then we shall drop out of the rank of +learners, and the school will go without us, jest as busily, jest +as cheerfully, jest as laboriously, jest as sadly. Poor learners +at the hard lessons of life. Learnin' out of a book that is held +out to us from the shadows by an onseen, inexorable hand. +Settin' on hard benches that may fall out from under us at any +time. Poor ignerent creeters that we are, would it not be a too +arrant folly for us to judge each other hardly, we, all on us, so +deplorably ignerent, so weakly helpless?" + +Sez Josiah, in earnest axcents, "Le's walk a little faster." + +And, in lookin' up, I see that he wuz readin' a advertisement. I +ketched sight of a picture ornamentin' of it. It wuz Lydia +Pinkham. And as I see that benine face, I found and recovered +myself. Truly, I had been a soarin' up, up, fur above Saratoga, +Patent Medicines, Josiah Allen, etc., etc. + +But when I found myself by the side of Josiah Allen once more, I +moved onwards in silence, and soon we found ourselves right by +the haven where I desired to be, -- our own tried and true +boardin' house. + +Truly eloquence is tuckerin', very, especially when you are a +soarin' and a walkin' at the same time. + + + + +XIX. + +ST. CHRISTINA'S HOME. + + +Wall, it wuz that very afternoon, almost immegetly after dinner, +that Josiah Allen invited me warmly to go with him to the Roller +Coaster. And I compromised the matter by his goin' with us first +to St. Christina's Home, and then, I told him, I would proceed +with him to the place where he would be. They wuz both on one +road, nigh to each other, and he consented after some words. + +I felt dretfully interested in this Home, for it is a place where +poor little sick children are took to, out of their miserable, +stiflin', dirty garrets, and cellars, and kep' and made well and +happy in their pleasant, home-like surroundin's. And I thought +to myself, as I looked ont on the big grounds surroundin' it, and +walked through the clean wide rooms, that the change to these +children, brought out of their narrow dark homes of want and woe, +into this great sunshiny Home with its clean fresh rooms, its +good food, its cheery Christian atmosphere, its broad sunshiny +playgrounds, must seem like enterin' Paradise to 'em. + +And I thought to myself how thankful I wuz that this pleasant +House Beautiful, wuz prepared for the rest and refreshment of the +poor little pilgrims, worn out so early in the march of life. +And I further thinkses I, "Heaven bless the kind heart that first +thought on't, and carried out the heavenly idee." + +The children's faces all looked, so happy, and bright, it wuz a +treat to see 'em. And the face of the sister who showed us round +the rooms looked as calm, and peaceful, and happy, as if her face +wuz the sun from which their little lights wuz reflected. + +Up amongst the rooms overhead, every one on 'em clean as a pin +and sweet and orderly, wuz one room that specially attracted my +attention. It wuz a small chapel where the little ones wuz took +to learn their prayers and say 'em. It wuzn't a big, barren barn +of a room, such as I have often seen in similar places, and which +I have always thought must impress the children with a awful sense +of the immensity and lonesomeness of space, and the intangebility, +and distance of the Great Spirit who inhabiteth Eternity. No, it +wuz small, and cozy, and cheerful, like a home. And the stained +glass window held a beautiful picture of love and charity, which +might well touch the children's hearts, sweetly and unconsciously, +with the divine worth of love, and beauty, and goodness. + +And I could fancy the dear, little ones kneelin' here, and +prayin' "Our Father, who art in Heaven," and feelin' that He wuz +indeed their Father, and not a stranger, and that Heaven wuz not +fur off from 'em. + +And I thought to myself "Never! never! through all their life +will they get entirely away from the pure, sweet lessons they +learn here." + +I enjoyed the hour I spent here with a deep, heart enjoyment, and +so did Josiah. Or, that is, I guess he did, though he whispered +to me from time to time, or even oftener, as we went through the +buildin', that we wuz a devourin' time that we might be spendin' +at the Roller Coaster. + +Wall, at last, greatly to my pardner's satisfaction, we sot out +for the place where he fain would be. On our way there we roamed +through another Indian Encampment, a smaller one than that where +we had the fearful incident of the Mermaid and Sarah. + +No, it wuzn't so big, but it had many innocent diversions and a +photograph gallery, and other things for its comfert. And a +standin' up a leanin' aginst a tree, by one of the little houses +stood a Injun. He wuz one of the last left of his tribe. He +seemed to be a lookin' pensively on -- and seein' how the land +that had belonged to 'em, the happy huntin'-grounds, the springs +they believed the Great Spirit had gin to 'em, had all passed +away into the bands of another race. + +I wuz sorry for that Injun, real sorry. And thinkses I to +myself, we feel considerable pert now, and lively, but who knows +in another three or four hundred years, but what one of the last +of our race, may be a leanin' up aginst some new tree, right in +the same spot, a watchin' the old places passed away into other +hands, mebby black hands, or some other colored ones; mebby +yellow ones, who knows? I don't, nor Josiah don't. But my +pardner wuz a hurryin' me on, so I dropped my revery and my +umberell in my haste to foller on after his footsteps. + +Josiah picked up my umberell, but he couldn't pick up my soarin' +emotions for me. No, he haint never been able, to get holt of +'em. But suffice it to say, that soon, preceded by my companion, +I found myself a mountin' the nearly precipitus stairs, that led +to the Roller Coaster. + +And havin' reached the spot, who should we find there but Ardelia +Tutt and Bial Flamburg. They had been on the Roller Coaster +seven times in succession, and the car. And they wuz now a +sittin' down to recooperate their energies, and collect their +scattered wits together. The Roller Coaster is very scatterin' +to wits that are not collected firm and sound, and cemented by +strong common sense. + +The reason why the Roller Coaster don't scatter such folkses wits +is supposed to be because, they don't go on to it. Ardelia +looked as if her idees wuz scattered to the four pints of the +compass. As for Bial, it seemed to me, as if he never had none +to scatter. But he spoke out to once, and said, he didn't care +to ride on 'em. (Bial Flamburg's strong pint, is his +truthfulness, I can't deny that.) + +Ardelia wouldn't own up but what she enjoyed it dretfully. You +know folks are most always so. If they partake of a pleasure and +recreation that is doubtful in its effects, they will always say, +what a high extreme of enjoyment they enjoyed a partakin' of it. +Curius, haint it? Wall, Josiah had been anticipatin' so much +enjoyment from the exercise, that I didn't make no move to +prevent him from embarkin' on it -- though it looked hazardous +and dangerous in the extreme. + +I looked down on the long valleys, and precipitous heights of the +assents and desents, in which my pardner wuz so soon to be +assentin' and desentin' and I trembled, and wuz jest about to +urge him to forego his diversion, for the sake of his pardner's +happiness, but as I turned to expostulate with him, I see the +beautiful, joyous, hopeful look on his liniment, and the words +fell almost dead on my tongue. I felt that I had ruther suffer +in silence than to say one word to mar that bliss. + +Such is the love of pardners, and such is some of the agonies +they suffer silently to save from woundin' the more opposite one. +No, I said not a word; but silently sat, and see him makin' his +preparations to embark. He see the expression onto my face, and +he too wuz touched by it. He never said one word to me about +embarkin' too, which I laid to two reasons. One wuz my immovable +determination not to embark on the voyage, which I had confided +to him before. + +And the other wuz, the added expenses of the journey if he took +his companion with him. + +No, I felt that he thought it wuz better we should part temporarily +than that the expenditure should be doubled. But as the time drew +near for him to leave me, I see by his meen that he felt bad about +leavin' me. He realized what a companion I had been to him. He +realized the safety and repose he had always found at my side and +the unknown dangers he wuz a rushin' into. + +And he got up and silently shook hands with me. He would have +kissed me, I make no doubt, if folks hadn't been a standin' by. +He then embarked, and with lightnin' speed wuz bore away from me, +as he dissapeared down the desent, his few gray hairs waved back, +and as he went over the last precipitus hill, I heard him cry out +in agonizin' axents, "Samantha! Samantha!" + +And I rushed forwards to his rescue but so lightnin' quick wuz +their movements that I met my companion a comin' back, and I sez, +the first thing, "I heard your cry, Josiah! I rushed to save +you, my dear pardner." + +"Yes," sez he, "I spoke out to you, to call your attention to the +landscape, over the woods there!" + +I looked at him in a curious, still sort of a way, and didn't say +nothin' only just that look. Why, that man looked all trembly +and broke up, but he kep' on. + +"Yes, it wuz beautiful and inspirin', and I knew you wuz such a +case for landscapes, I thought I would call your attention to +it." + +Sez I, coldly, "You wuz skairt, Josiah Allen, and you know it." + +"Skairt! the idee of me bein' skairt. I wuz callin' your +attention to the beauty of the view, over in the woods." + +"What wuz it?" sez I, still more coldly; for I can't bear deceit, +and coverin' up. + +"Oh, it wuz a house, and a tree, and a barn, and things." + +"A great seen to scream about," sez I. "It would probable have +stood there till you got back, but you couldn't seem to wait." + +"No, I have noticed that you always wanted to see things to once. +I have noticed it in you." + +"I could most probable have waited till you got back, to see a +house and a tree." And in still more -- frigid axents, I added, +"Or a barn." And I sez, kinder sarkastikly, "You enjoyed your +ride, I s'pose." + +"Immensely, it wuz perfectly beautiful! So sort a free and +soarin' like. It is jest what suits a man." + +"You'd better go right over it agin," sez I. + +"Yes," sez the man who runs the cars. "You'd better go agin." + +"Oh no," sez Josiah. + +"Why not?" sez I. + +"Why not?" sez the man. + +Josiah Allen looked all around the room, and down on the grass, +as if trying to find a good reasonable excuse a layin' round +loose somewhere, so's he could get holt of it. + +"You'd better go," sez I, "I love to see you happy, Josiah +Allen." + +"Yes, you'd better go," sez the man. + +"No!" sez Josiah, still a lookin' round for a excuse, up into the +heavens and onto the horizon. And at last his face kinder +brightenin' up, as if he had found one: "No, it looks so kinder +cloudy, I guess I won't go. I think we shall have rain between +now and night." And so we said no more on the subject and sot +out homewards. + +Ardelia wrote a poem on the occasion, wrote it right there, with +rapidity and a lead pencil, and handed it to me, before I left +the room. I put it into my pocket and didn't think on it, for +some days afterwards. + +That night after we got home from the Roller Coaster, I felt +dretful sort a down hearted about Abram Gee, I see in that little +incident of the day, that Bial, although I couldn't like him, yet +I see he had his good qualities, I see how truthful he wuz. And +although I love truth -- I fairly worship it -- yet I felt that +if things wuz as he said they wuz, he would more'n probable get +Ardelia Tutt, for I know the power of Ambition in her, and I felt +that she would risk the chances of happiness, for the name of +bein' a Banker's Bride. + +So I sat there in deep gloom, and a chocolate colored wrapper, +till as late as half past nine o'clock P. M. And I felt that the +course of Abram's love wuz not runnin' smooth. No, I felt that +it wuz runnin' in a dwindlin' torrent over a rocky bed, and a +precipitus one. And I felt that if he wuz with me then and +there, if we didn't mingle our tears together we could our +sithes, for I sithed, powerful and frequent. + +Poor short-sighted creeter that I wuz, a settin' in the shadow, +when the sun wuz jest a gettin' ready to shine out onto Abram and +reflect off onto my envious heart. Even at that very time the +hand of righteous Retribution had slipped its sure noose over +Bial Flamburg's neck, and wuz a walkin' him away from Ardelia, +away from happiness (oritory). + +At that very hour, half past nine P. M., Ardelia Tutt and Abram +Gee had met agin, and rosy love and happiness wuz even then a +stringin' roses on the chain that wuz to bind 'em together +forever. + +The way on't wuz: It bein' early when Ardelia got here, Bial +proposed to take her out for a drive and she consented. He got a +livery horse, and buggy, and they say that the livery man knew +jest what sort of a creeter the horse wuz, and knew it wuz liable +to break the buggy all to pieces and them to, and he let 'em have +it for goin.' But howsumever, whether that is so or not, when +they got about five or six milds from Saratoga the horse skeert +out of the road, and throwed 'em both out. + +It wuz a bank of sand that skeert it, a high bank that wuz piled +up by a little hovel that stood by the side of the road. The +ground all round the hut wuz too poor to raise anything else but +sand, and had raised sights of that. + +A man and woman, dretful shabby lookin', wuz a standin' by the +door of the hut, and the man had a shovel in his hand, and had +been a loadin' sand into a awful big wheelbarrow that wuz a +standin' by -- seemin'ly ready to carry it acrost the fields, to +where some man wuz a mixin' some motar, to lay the foundations of +a barn. + +Wall, the old man stood a pantin' by the side of the wheelbarrow, +as if he had indeed got on too heavy a load. It wuz piled up +high. The horse shied, and Ardelia wuz throwed right out onto +the bank of sand, Bial by the side of her. And the old man and +woman came a runnin' up, and callin' out, "Bial, my son, my son, +are you wounded?" + +And there it all wuz. Ardelia see the hull on it. The Banker +wuz before her, and she wuz a layin' on the bank. And the banker +wuz a doin' a heavy business, if anybody doubted it, let 'em take +holt and cart a load on it acrost the fields. + +Wall, Ardelia wuz jarred fearful, in her heart, her ambition, her +pride, and her bones. And as the horse wuz a fleein' far away, +and no other conveyance could be found to transport her to the +next house (Ardelia wouldn't go into his'n), and night wuz +approachin' with rapid strides, the old Banker jest unloaded the +load of sand (good old creeter, he would have to load it all over +agin), and took Ardelia into the wheelbarrow, and wheeled her +over to the next house and unloaded her. + +The old Banker told Ardelia that when his neighbor got home he +would take her back to Saratoga, which he did. He had been to +the village for necessaries, but he turned right round and +carried her back to Mr. Pixleyses. And I s'pose Ardelia paid +him, mebby as high as 75 cents. As for Bial, he tramped off +into the house, and she didn't see him agin, nor didn't want to. +Wall, I s'pose it wuz durin' that ride on the wheelbarrow, that +Ardelia's ambition quelled to softer emotions. I s'pose so. She +never owned it right up to me, but I s'pose so. + +Bial Flamburg hadn't lied a word to her. In all her agony she +realized that. But she had built a high towerin' structure of +ambition on what he said, and it had tottered. And as is natural +in times of danger, the heart turns instinctively to its true +love, she thought of Abram Gee, she wanted him. And as if in +answer to her deep and lovin' thought, who should come out to the +buggy to help her out at Mr. Pixleyses gate, but Abram Gee? He +had come unexpected, and on the eight o'clock train, and wuz +there waitin' for her. + +If Bial Flamburg had been with her, he wouldn't have gone a nigh +the buggy, but he see it was a old man, and he rushed out. +Ardelia couldn't walk a step on her feet (owin' to bein shaken +up, in bones and feelin's), and Abram jest took her in his strong +lovin' arms and carried her into the house, and she sort a clung +round his neck, and seemed tickled enough to see him, + +But she wuz dretful shook up and agitated, and it wuzn't till way +along in the night some time, that she wuz able to write a poem +called, "a lay on a wheelbarrow; or, the fallen one." + +Which I thought when I read it, wuz a good name for it, for truly +she had fell, and truly she had lay on it. Howsumever, Ardelia +wrote that jest because it wuz second nater to write poetry on +every identical thing she ever see or did. + +She wuz glad enough to get rid of Bial Flamburg, and glad enough +to go back to her old love. Abram wuz too manly and tender to +say a word to Ardelia that night on the subject nearest to his +heart. No, he see she needed rest. But the next day, when they +wuz alone together, I s'pose he put the case all before her. All +his warm burnin' love for her, all his jealousy, and his +wretchedness while she wuz a waverin' between Banks and Bread, +how his heart had been checked by the thought that Bial would +vault over him, and in the end hold him at a discount. + +Why, I s'pose he talked powerful and melted Ardelia's soft little +heart till it wuz like the softest kind of dough in his hands. +And then he went on tenderly to say, how he needed her, and how +she could mould him to her will. I s'pose he talked well, and +eloquent, I s'pose so. Anyhow she accepted him right there in +full faith and a pink and white cambric dress. + +And they came over and told me about it in the afternoon P. M. +And I felt well and happy in my mind, and wished 'em joy with a +full heart and a willin' mind. + +They are both good creeters. And she bein' so soft, and he so +kinder hardy and stout-hearted, I believe they will get along +firstrate. And when she once let her mind and heart free to +think on him, she worships him so openly and unreservedly (though +soft), that I don't, believe there is a happier man in the hull +country. + +Wall, I lay out to give'em a handsome present when they be +married, which will be in the fall. Mother Gee (who has got as +well as can be expected) is goin' to live with Susan. And I'm +glad on't. Mother Gee is a good old female no doubt, but it is +resky work to take a new husband to live with, and when you take +a mother-in-law too it adds to the resk. + +But she is goin' to live with Susan; it is her prefference. + +And Abram has done so well, that he has bought another five acres +onto his place, and is a goin' to fix his house all over splendid +before the weddin' day. And Ardelia is to go right from the +altar to her home -- it is her own wishes. + +She knows enough in her way, Ardelia duz. And she has a wisdom +of the heart which sometimes I think, goes fur ahead of the +wisdom of the head. And then agin, I think they go well +together, wisdom of the head and the heart too. (The times I +think this is after readin' her poetry.) + +But any way she will make Abram a good soft little wife, lovin' +and affectionate always. And good land! he loves her to that +extent that it wouldn't make no difference to him if she didn't +know enough to come in when it rained. He would fetch her in, +drippin' and worship her, damp or dry. + + + + +XX. + +AN ACCIDENT WITH RESULTS. + + +Wall, it wuz on the very day before we laid out to leave for +home. I wuz a settin' in my room a mendin' up a rip in my +pardner's best coat, previous to packin' in his trunk, when all +of a sudden Miss Flamm's hired girl came in a cryin', and sez I, +"What is the matter?" + +And sez she, "Ah! Miss Flamm has sent for you and Mr. Allen to +come over there right away. There has been a axident." + +"A axident!" sez I. + +"Yes," sez she. "The little girl has got hurt, and they don't +think she will live. Poor little pretty thing," sez the hired +girl, and busted out a cryin' agin. + +"How did she get hurt?" sez I, as I laid down the coat, and went +to tyin' on my bunnet mekanically. + +"Wall, the nurse had her out with the baby and the little boys. +And we s'pose she had been drinkin' too much. We all knew she +drinked, and she wuzn't in a condition to go out with the +children this mornin', and Miss Flamm would have noticed it and +kep' 'em in, but the dog wuz sick all night, and Miss Flamm wuz +up with it most all night, and she felt wore out this mornin' +with her anxtety for the dog, and her want of sleep, and so they +went out, and it wuzn' more'n half an hour before it took place. +She left the baby carriage and the little boys and girl in a +careless place, not knowin' what she wuz about, and they got run +over. The baby and the little boys wuzn't hurt much, but they +think the little girl will die. Miss Flamm went right into a +caniption fit," sez she, "when she wuz brung in." + +"It is a pity she hadn't went into one before," sez I very dryly, +dry as a chip almost. My axents wuz fairly dusty they wuz so +dry. But my feelin's for Miss Flamm moistened up and melted down +when I see her, when we went into the room. It didn't take us +long for they are still to the tarven, and we met Josiah Allen at +the door, so he went with us. + +Yes, Miss Flamm felt bad enough, bad enough. She has got a +mother's heart after all, down under all the strings and girtins, +and laces, and dogs, etc., etc., that have hid it, and surrounded +it. Her face wuz jest as white and deathly as the little girl's, +and that wuz jest the picture of stillness and death. And I +remembered then that I had heard that the little girl wuz her +favorite amongst her children, whenever she had any time to +notice 'em. She wuz a only daughter and a beauty, besides bein' +smart. + +The doctor had been there and done what he could, and go gone +away. He said there wuz nothin' more to do till she came out of +that stuper, if she ever did. + +But it looked like death, and there Miss Flamm sot alone with her +child, and her conscience. She wuzn't a cryin' but there wuz a +look in her eyes, in her set white face that went beyond tears, +fur beyond 'em. She gripped holt of my hand with her icy cold +ones, and sez she, "Pray for me!" She wuz brung up a Methodist, +and knew we wuz the same. My feelin's overcame me as I looked in +her face and the child's, both lookin' like dyin' faces, and I +sez with the tears a jest runnin' down my cleeks and a layin' my +hand tender on her shoulder, "Is there anything I can do for you, +you poor little creeter?" + +"Pray for me," sez she agin, with her white lips not movin' in a +smile, nor a groan. + +Now my companion, Josiah Allen, is a class-leader, and though I +say it that mebby shouldn't -- That man is able in prayer. He +prays as if he meant what he said. He don't try to show off in +oritory as so many do, or give the Lord information. He never +sez, "Oh Lord, thou knowest by the mornin' papers, so and so." +No, he prays in simple words for what he wants. And he always +seems to feel that somebody is nigh to him, a hearin' him, and if +it is best and right, his requests will be granted. + +So I motioned for that man to kneel down by the bed and pray, +which he did. He wuz to the fore side of the bed, and Miss Flamm +and I on the other side. Wall, Josiah commenced his prayer, in a +low earnest askin' voice, then all of a sudden he begun to +hesitate, waver, and act dretful agitated. And his actions and +agitations seemed to last for some time. I thought it wuz his +feelin's overcomin' of him, and of course, my hand bein' over my +eyes in a respectful, decent way, I didin't see nothin'. + +But at last, after what wuz seemingly a great effort, he began to +go on as usual agin. About that time I heard sunthin' hit the +wall hard on the other side of the room, and I heard a yelp. But +then everything wuz still and Josiah Allen made a good prayer. +And before it wuz through Miss Flamm laid her head down onto my +shoulder, and busted into tears. + +And what wuz rooted up and washed away by them tears I don't +know, and I don't s'pose anybody duz. Whether vanity, and a +mistaken ambition, and the poor empty successes of a fashionable +life wuz uprooted and floated away on the awakened, sweepin' tide +of a mother's love and remorse; whether the dog floated down that +stream, and low necked dresses, and high hazardus slippers, and +strings for waists and corsets, and fashion, and folly, and +rivalry, and waltzin', and glitter, and buttons, and show; whether +they all went down that stream, swept along like bubbles on a +heavin' tumultuous tide, I don't know, nor I don't s'pose anybody +duz. + +But any way, from that day on Miss Flamm has been a different +woman. I stayed with her all that night and the next day, she a +not leavin' the child's bed for a minute, and we a not gettin' of +her to, much as we tried to; eatin' whatever we could make her +eat right there by the bedside. And on the 2d day the doctor see +a change in the child and she began to roust a little out of that +stuper, and in a week's time, she wuz a beginnin' to get well. + +We stayed on till she wuz out of danger and then we went home. +But I see that she wuz to be trusted with her children after +that. She dismissed that nurse, got a good motherly one, who she +said would help her take care of the children for the future; +only help her, for she should have the oversight of 'em herself, +always. + +The hired girl told me (Miss Flamm never mentioned it to me), and +she wuz glad enough of it, that the dog wuz dead. It died the +day the little girl wuz hurt. The hired girl said the doctor had +told Miss Flamm, that it couldn't live long. But it wuzn't till +we wuz on our way home that I found out one of the last eppisodes +in that dog's life. You see, sick as that dog wuz, it wuz bound +to bark at my pardner as long as it had a breath left in its body. +And Josiah told me in confidence (and it must be kep', it is right +that it should be); he said jest after he had knelt down and began +to pray he felt that dog climb up onto his heels, and pull at his +coat tails, and growl a low mad growl, and naw at 'em. + +He tried to nestle round and get it off quietly but no, there it +stood right onto Josiah Allen's heels, and hung on, and tugged at +them coat-tails, and growled at 'em that low deep growl, and shook +'em, as if determined to worry 'em off. And there my companion +wuz. He couldn't show his feelin's in his face; he had got to +keep his face all right towards Miss Flamm. And his feelin's was +rousted up about her, and he wuz a wantin', and knew he wuz +expected, to have his words and manner soothin' and comfortin', +and that dog a standin' on his heels and tearin' off his coat-tails. + +What to do he didn't know. He couldn't stop his prayer on such a +time as this and kill a dog, though he owned up to me that he +felt like it, and he couldn't keep still and feel his coat-tails +tore off of him, and be growled at, and shook, and pawed at all +day. So he said after the dog had gin a most powerful tug, almost +a partin' the skirts asunder from his coat, he drew up one foot +carefully (still a keepin' his face straight and the prayer agoin') +and brung it back sudden and voyalent, and he heard the dog strike +aginst the opposite side of the room with one short, sharp yelp, +and then silence rained down and he finished the prayer. + +But he said, and owned it up to me, that it didn't seem to him so +much like a religious exercise, as he could wish. It didn't seem +to help his spiritual growth much, if any. + +And I sez, "I should think as much," and I sez, "You wuz in a +hard place, Josiah Allen." + +And he sez, "It wuz the dumbest hard place any one wuz ever in on +earth." + +And I sez, "I don't know but it wuz." That man wuz to be pitied, +and I told him so, and he acted real cheerful and contented at +hearin' my mind. He owned up that he had dreaded tellin' me +about it, for fear I would upbraid him. But, good land! I would +have been a hard hearted creeter if I could upbraid a man for +goin' through such a time as that. He said he thought mebby I +would think it wuz irreverent or sunthin', the dog's actions, at +such a time. + +"Wall," sez I, "you didn't choose the actions, did you? It +wuzn't nothin' you wanted." + +"No," sez he feelin'ly. "Heaven knows I didn't. And I done the +best I could," sez he sort a pitiful. + +Sez I, "I believe you, Josiah Allen," and sez I warmly, "I don't +believe that Alexander, or Cezar, or Grover Cleveland, could have +done any better." + +He brightened all up at this, he felt dretful well to think I +felt with him, and my feelin's wuz all rousted up to think of the +sufferin's he had went through, so we felt real well towards each +other. Such is some of the comforts and consolations of pardners. +Howsumever, the dog died, and I wuz kinder sorry for the dog. I +think enough of dogs (as dogs) and always did. Always use 'em +dretful well, only it mads me to have 'em put ahead of children, +and sot up in front of 'em. I always did and always shall like a +dog as a dog. + +Wall, they say that when that dog died, Miss Flamm hardly +inquired about it, she wuz so took up in gettin' acquainted with +her own children. And I s'pose they improved on acquaintance, +for they say she is jest devoted to 'em. And she got acquainted +with G. Washington too, so they say. He wuz a stiddy, quiet man, +and she had got to lookin' on him as her banker and business man. +But they say she liked him real well, come to get acquainted with +him. He always jest worshipped her, so they are real happy. +There wuz always sunthin' kinder good about Miss Flamm. + +Thos. J. is a carryin' on another lawsuit for her (more money +that descended onto her from her father, or that ort to descend). +And he is carryin' it stiddy and safe. It will bring Thomas +Jefferson over 900 dollars in money besides fame, a hull lot of +fame. + +Wall, we sot sail for home in good spirits, and the noon train. +And we reached Jonesville with no particular eppisodin' till we +got to the Jonesville Depot. + +I rather think Ardelia Tutt wrote a poem on the cars goin' home, +though I can't say for certain. + +She and Abram sot a few seats in front of us, and I thought I see +a certain look to the backside of her head that meant poetry. It +wuz a kind of a sot look, and riz up like. But I can't say for +certain for she didn't have no chance to tell me about it. Abram +looked down at her all the time as if he jest worshipped her. +And she is a good little creeter, and will make him a happy wife; +I don't make no doubt. As I said, the old lady is goin' to live +with Susan. They went right on in the train, for Ardelia's home +lays beyond Jonesville, and Abram wuz goin' home with her by +Deacon Tutt's request. They are willin'. + +Wall, we disembarked from the cars, and we found the old mair and +the "Democrat" a waitin' for us. Thomas J. wuz a comin' for us, +but had spraint his wrist and couldn't drive. Wall, Josia lifted +our saddul bags in, and my umbrell, and the band box. But when +he went to lift my trunk he faltered. It wuz heavy. I had got +relicts from Mount McGregor, from the Battlefield, from the +various springs, minerals, stuns, and things, and Josiah couldn't +lift it. + +What added to the hardness of the job, the handles had broken +offen it, and he had to grip hold on it, by the might of his +finger nails. It wuz a hard job, and Josiah's face got red and I +felt, as well as see, that his temper wuz a risin'. And I sez, +instinctively, "Josiah, be calm!" For I knew not what unguarded +word he might drop as he vainly tried to grip hold on't, and it +eluded his efferts and came down on the ground every time, a +carryin' with it, I s'pose, portions of his fingernails, broke +off in the fray. + +Wall, he wuz a strugglin' with it and with his feelin's, for I +kep' on a sayin', "Josiah, do be calm! Do be careful about usin' +a profane word so nigh home and at this time of day, and you jest +home from a tower." + +And he kep' his feelin's nobly under control, and never said a +word, only to wonder "what under the High Heavens a woman wanted +to lug round a ton of stuns in her trunk for." And anon sayin' +that he would be dumbed if he didn't leave it right there on the +platform. + +Savin' these few slight remarks that man nobly restrained +himself, and lugged and lifted till the blood almost gushed +through his bald head. And right in the midst of the fray, a +porter came up and went to liftin' the trunk in the usual +highheaded, haughty way Railroad officials have. But anon a +change came over his linement. And as it fell back from his +fingers to the platform for the 3d time, he broke out in a +torrent of swearin' words dretful to hear. + +I felt as if I should sink through the "Democrat". But Josiah +listened to the awful words with a warm glow of pleasure and +satisfaction a beamin' from his face. I never saw him look more +complacent. And as the man moistened his hands and with another +frightful burst of profanity histed it into the end of the buggy. + +Wall, I gin the man a few warnin' words aginst profanity, and +Josiah gin him a quarter for liftin' in the trunk, he said, and +we drove off in the meller glow of the summer sunset. + +But it wuz duskish before we got to the turn of the road, and +considerable dark before we got to the Corners. But we went on +tbgough the shadows, a feelin' we could bear 'em, for we wuz +together, and we wuz a goin' home. + +And pretty soon we got there! The door wuz open, the warm light +wuz a streamin' out from doors and windows, and there stood the +children! + +There they all wuz, all we loved best, a waitin' to welcome us. +Love, which is the light of Heaven, wuz a shinin' on their faces, +and we had got home. + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg Etext of Samantha at Saratoga, by Marietta Holley + diff --git a/old/3425.zip b/old/3425.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..2c3c76f --- /dev/null +++ b/old/3425.zip diff --git a/old/saman10.txt b/old/saman10.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..b02085e --- /dev/null +++ b/old/saman10.txt @@ -0,0 +1,9344 @@ +Project Gutenberg Etext of Samantha at Saratoga, by Marietta Holley +by Josiah Allen's Wife (Marietta Holley) + +Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check +the laws for your country before redistributing these files!!! + +Please take a look at the important information in this header. +We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an +electronic path open for the next readers. + +Please do not remove this. + +This should be the first thing seen when anyone opens the book. +Do not change or edit it without written permission. 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FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.08.01*END** +[Portions of this header are copyright (C) 2001 by Michael S. Hart +and may be reprinted only when these Etexts are free of all fees.] +[Project Gutenberg is a TradeMark and may not be used in any sales +of Project Gutenberg Etexts or other materials be they hardware or +software or any other related product without express permission.] + + + + +This etext was produced by an anonymous volunteer. + + + + + +SAMANTHA AT SARATOGA BY JOSIAH ALLEN'S WIFE + (Marietta Holly) + + + +Dedication: + + TO THE GREAT ARMY OF + SUMMER TRAMPS + THIS BOOK IS DEDICATED + BY THEIR COMRADE AND FELLOW WANDERER + THE AUTHOR + + + + +CONTENTS. + +CHAPTER I. SAMANTHA AT SARATOGA + +CHAPTER II. ARDELIA TUTT AND HER MOTHER + +CHAPTER III. THE CHERITY OF THE JONESVILLIANS + +CHAPTER IV. ARDELIA AND ABRAM GEE + +CHAPTER V. WE ARRIVE AT SARATOGA + +CHAPTER VI. SARATOGA BY DAYLIGHT + +CHAPTER VII. SEEING THE DIFFERENT SPRINGS + +CHAPTER VIII. JOSIAH AND SAMANTHA TAKE A LONG WALK + +CHAPTER IX. JOSIAH'S FLIRTATIONS + +CHAPTER X. MISS G. WASHINGTON FLAMM + +CHAPTER XI. VISIT TO THE INDIAN ENCAMPMENT + +CHAPTER XII. A DRIVE TO SARATOGA LAKE + +CHAPTER XIII. VISITS TO NOTABLE PLACES + +CHAPTER XIV. LAKE GEORGE AND MOUNT McGREGOR + +CHAPTER XV. ADVENTURES AT VARIOUS SPRINGS + +CHAPTER XVI. AT A LAWN PARTY + +CHAPTER XVII. A TRIP TO SCHUYLERVILLE + +CHAPTER XVIII. THE SOCIAL SCIENCE MEETING + +CHAPTER XIX. ST. CHRISTINA'S HOME + +CHAPTER XX. AN ACCIDENT WITH RESULTS + + + + + A SORT OF PREFACE. + +WHICH IT IS NOT NECESSARY TO READ. + +When Josiah read my dedication he said "it wuz a shame to dedicate +a book that it had took most a hull bottle of ink to write, to a +lot of creeters that he wouldn't have in the back door yard." + +But I explained it to him, that I didn't mean tramps with broken +hats, variegated pantaloons, ventilated shirt-sleeves, and +barefooted. But I meant tramps with diamond ear-rings, and +cuff-buttons, and Saratoga trunks, and big accounts at their +bankers. + +And he said, "Oh, shaw!" + +But I went on nobly, onmindful of that shaw, as female pardners +have to be, if they accomplish all the talkin' they want to. + +And sez I, "It duz seem sort o' pitiful, don't it, to think how +sort o' homeless the Americans are a gettin'? How the posys that +blow under the winders of Home are left to waste their sweet +breaths amongst the weeds, while them that used to love 'em are a +climbin' mountain tops after strange nosegays." + +The smoke that curled up from the chimbleys, a wreathin' its way +up to the heavens -- all dead and gone. The bright light that +shone out of the winder through the dark a tellin' everybody that +there wuz a Home, and some one a waitin' for somebody -- all dark +and lonesome. + +Yes, the waiter and the waited for are all a rushin' round +somewhere, on the cars, mebby, or a yot, a chasin' Pleasure, that +like as not settled right down on the eves of the old house they +left, and stayed there. + +I wonder if they will find her there when they go back again. +Mebby they will, and then agin, mebby they won't. For Happiness +haint one to set round and lame herself a waitin' for folks to +make up their minds. + +Sometimes she looks folks full in the face, sort o' solemn like +and heart-searchin', and gives 'em a fair chance what they will +chuse. And then if they chuse wrong, shee'll turn her back to +'em, for always. I've hearn of jest such cases. + +But it duz seem sort o' solemn to think -- how the sweet restful +felin's that clings like ivy round the old familier door steps -- +where old 4 fathers feet stopped, and stayed there, and baby feet +touched and then went away -- I declare for't, it almost brings +tears, to think how that sweet clingin' vine of affection, and +domestic repose, and content -- how soon that vine gets tore up +nowadays. + +It is a sort of a runnin' vine anyway, and folks use it as sech, +they run with it. Jest as it puts its tendrils out to cling round +some fence post, or lilock bush, they pull it up, and start off +with it. And then its roots get dry, and it is some time before +it will begin to put out little shoots and clingin' leaves agin +round some petickular mountain top, or bureau or human bein'. And +then it is yanked up agin, poor little runnin' vine, and run with +-- and so on -- and so on -- and so on. + +Why sometimes it makes me fairly heart-sick to think on't. And I +fairly envy our old 4 fathers, who used to set down for several +hundred years in one spot. They used to get real rested, it must +be they did. + +Jacob now, settin' right by that well of his'n for pretty nigh two +hundred years. How much store he must have set by it during the +last hundred years of 'em! How attached he must have been to it! + +Good land! Where is there a well that one of our rich old +American patriarks will set down by for two years, leavin' off the +orts. There haint none, there haint no such a well. Our +patriarks haint fond of well water, anyway. + +And old Miss Abraham now, and Miss Isaac -- what stay to home +wimmen they wuz, and equinomical! + +What a good contented creeter Sarah Abraham wuz. How settled +down, and stiddy, stayin' right to home for hundreds of years. +Not gettin' rampent for a wider spear, not a coaxin' old Mr. +Abraham nights to take her to summer resorts, and winter hants of +fashion. + +No, old Mr. Abraham went to bed, and went to sleep for all of her. + +And when they did once in a hundred years, or so, make up their +minds to move on a mile or so, how easy they traveled. Mr. +Abraham didn't have to lug off ten or twelve wagon loads of +furniture to the Safe Deposit Company, and spend weeks and weeks a +settlin' his bisness, in Western lands, and Northern mines, +Southern railroads, and Eastern wildcat stocks, to get ready to +go. And Miss Abraham didn't have to have a dozen dress-makers in +the house for a month or two, and messenger boys, and dry goods +clerks, and have to stand and be fitted for basks and polenays, +and back drapery, and front drapery, and tea gowns, and dinner +gowns, and drivin' gowns, and mornin' gowns, and evenin' gowns, +and etectery, etcetery, etcetery. + +No, all the preperations she had to make wuz to wrop her mantilly +a little closter round her, and all Mr. Abraham had to do wuz to +gird up his lions. That is what it sez. And I don't believe it +would take much time to gird up a few lions, it don't seem to me +as if it would. + +And when these few simple preperations had been made, they jest +histed up their tent and laid it acrost a camel, and moved on a +mild or two, walkin' afoot. + +Why jest imagine if Miss Abraham had to travel with eight or ten +big Saratoga trunks, how could they have been got up onto that +camel? It couldn't lave been done. The camel would have died, +and old Mr. Abraham would also have expired a tryin' to lift 'em +up. No, it was all for the best. + +And jest think on't, for all of these simple, stay to home ways, +they called themselves Pilgrims and Sojourners. Good land! What +would they have thought nowadays to see folks make nothin' of +settin' off for China, or Japan or Jerusalem before breakfast. + +And what did they know of the hardships of civilization? Now to +sposen the case, sposen Miss Abraham had to live in New York +winters, and go to two or three big receptions every day, and to +dinner parties, and theatre parties, and operas and such like, +evenin's, and receive and return about three thousand calls, and +be on more 'n a dozen charitable boards (hard boards they be too, +some on 'em) and lots of other projects and enterprizes -- be on +the go the hull winter, with a dress so tight she couldn't breathe +instead of her good loose robes, and instead of her good +comfortable sandals have her feet upon high-heeled shoes pinchin' +her corns almost unto distraction. And then to Washington to go +all through it agin, and more too, and Florida, and Cuba; and then +to the sea-shore and have it all over agin with sea bathin' added. + +And then to the mountains, and all over agin with climbin' round +added. Then to Europe, with seas sickness, picture galleries, +etc., added. And so on home agin in the fall to begin it all over +agin. + +Why Miss Abraham would be so tuckered out before she went half +through with one season, that she would be a dead 4 mother. + +And Mr. Abraham -- why one half hour down at the stock exchange +would have been too much for that good old creeter. The yells and +cries, and distracted movements of the crowd of Luker Gatherers +there, would have skairt him to death. He never would have lived +to follow Miss Abraham round from pillow to post through summer +and winter seasons -- he wouldn't have lived to waltz, or +toboggen, or suffer other civilized agonies. No, he would have +been a dead patriark. And better off so, I almost think. + +Not but what I realize that civilization has its advantages. Not +but what I know that if Mr. Abraham wanted Miss Abraham to part +his hair straight, or clean off his phylackrity when she happened +to be out a pickin' up manny, he couldn't stand on one side of his +tent and telephone to bring her back, but had to yell at her. + +And I realize fully that if one of his herd got strayed off into +another county, they hadn't no telegraf to head it off, but the +old man had to poke off through rain or sun, and hunt it up +himself. And he couldn't set down cross-legged in front of his +tent in the mornin', and read what happened on the other side of +the world, the evenin' before. + +And I know that if he wanted to set down some news, they had to +kill a sheep, and spend several years a dressin' off the hide into +parchment -- and kill a goose, or chase it up till they wuz beat +out, for a goose-quill. + +And then after about 20 years or so, they could put it down that +Miss Isaac had got a boy -- the boy, probably bein' a married man +himself and a father when the news of his birth wuz set down. + +I realize this, and also the great fundimental fact that underlies +all philosophies, that you can't set down and stand up at the same +time -- and that no man, however pure and lofty his motives may +be, can't lean up against a barn door, and walk off simultanious. +And if he don't walk off, then the great question comes in, How +will he get there? And he feels lots of times that he must stand +up so's to bring his head up above the mullien and burdock stalks, +amongst which he is a settin', and get a wider view-a broader +horizeon. And he feels lots of time, that he must get there. + +This is a sort of a curius world, and it makes me feel curius a +good deal of the time as we go through it. But we have to make +allowances for it, for the old world is on a tramp, too. It can't +seem to stop a minute to oil up its old axeltrys -- it moves on, +and takes us with it. It seems to be in a hurry. + +Everything seems to be in a hurry here below. And some say Heaven +is a place of continual sailin' round and goin' up and up all the +time. But while risin' up and soarin' is a sweet thought to me, +still sometimes I love to think that Heaven is a place where I can +set down, and set for some time. + +I told Josiah so (waked him up, for he wuz asleep), and he said he +sot more store on the golden streets, and the wavin' palms, and +the procession of angels. (And then he went to sleep agin.) + +But I don't feel so. I'd love, as I say, to jest set down for +quite a spell, and set there, to be kinder settled down and to +home with them whose presence makes a home anywhere. I wouldn't +give a cent to sail round unless I wuz made to know it wuz my duty +to sail. Josiah wants to. + +But, as I say, everybody is in a hurry. Husbands can't hardly +find time to keep up a acquaintance with their wives. Fathers +don't have no time to get up a intimate acquaintance with their +children. Mothers are in such a hurry -- babys are in such a +hurry -- that they can't scarcely find time to be born. And I +declare for't, it seems sometimes as if folks don't want to take +time to die. + +The old folks at home wait with faithful, tired old eyes for the +letter that don't come, for the busy son or daughter hasn't time +to write it -- no, they are too busy a tearin' up the running vine +of affection and home love, and a runnin' with it. + +Yes, the hull nation is in a hurry to get somewhere else, to go +on, it can't wait. It is a trampin' on over the Western slopes, a +trampin' over red men, and black men, and some white men a +hurryin' on to the West -- hurryin' on to the sea. And what then? + +Is there a tide of restfulness a layin' before it? Some cool +waters of repose where it will bathe its tired forward, and its +stun-bruised feet, and set there for some time? + +I don't s'pose so. I don't s'pose it is in its nater to. I +s'pose it will look off longingly onto the far off somewhere that +lays over the waters -- beyend the sunset. + + + JOSIAH ALLEN'S WIFE. +NEW YORK, June, 1887. + + + + +I. + +SAMANTHA AT SARATOGA. + + +The idee on't come to me one day about sundown, or a little before +sundown. I wuz a settin' in calm peace, and a big rockin' chair +covered with a handsome copperplate, a readin' what the Sammist +sez about "Vanity, vanity, all is vanity." The words struck deep, +and as I said, it was jest that very minute that the idee struck +me about goin' to Saratoga. Why I should have had the idee at +jest that minute, I can't tell, nor Josiah can't. We have talked +about it sense. + +But good land! such creeters as thoughts be never wuz, nor never +will be. They will creep in, and round, and over anything, and +get inside of your mind (entirely unbeknown to you) at any time. +Curious, haint it? -- How you may try to hedge 'em out, and shet +the doors and everything. But they will creep up into your mind, +climb up and draw up their ladders, and there they will be, and +stalk round independent as if they owned your hull head; curious! + +Well, there the idee wuz -- I never knew nothin' about it, nor how +it got there. But there it wuz, lookin' me right in the face of +my soul, kinder pert and saucy, sayin', "You'd better go to +Saratoga next summer; you and Josiah." + +But I argued with it. Sez I, "What should we go to Saratoga for? +None of the relations live there on my side, or on hison; why +should we go?" + +But still that idee kep' a hantin me; "You'd better go to Saratoga +next summer, you and Josiah." And it whispered, "Mebby it will +help Josiah's corns." (He is dretful troubled with corns.) And +so the idee kep' a naggin' me, it nagged me for three days and +three nights before I mentioned it to my Josiah. And when I did, +he scorfed at the idee. He said, "The idee of water curing them +dumb corns -- " + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen, stranger things have been done;" sez I, +"that water is very strong. It does wonders." + +And he scorfed agin and sez, "Don't you believe faith could cure +em?" + +Sez I, "If it wuz strong enough it could." + +But the thought kep a naggin' me stiddy, and then -- here is the +curious part of it -- the thought nagged me, and I nagged Josiah, +or not exactly nagged; not a clear nag; I despise them, and always +did. But I kinder kep' it before his mind from day to day, and +from hour to hour. And the idee would keep a tellin' me things +and I would keep a tellin' 'em to my companion. The idee would +keep a sayin' to me, "It is one of the most beautiful places in +our native land. The waters will help you, the inspirin' music, +and elegance and gay enjoyment you will find there, will sort a +uplift you. You had better go there on a tower;" and agin it sez, +"Mebby it will help Josiah's corns." + +And old Dr. Gale a happenin' in at about that time, I asked him +about it (he doctored me when I wuz a baby, and I have helped 'em +for years. Good old creetur, he don't get along as well as he ort +to. Loontown is a healthy place.) I told him about my strong +desire to go to Saratoga, and I asked him plain if he thought the +water would help my pardner's corns. And he looked dreadful wise +and he riz up and walked across the floor 2 and fro several times, +probably 3 times to, and the same number of times fro, with his +arms crossed back under the skirt of his coat and his eyebrows +knit in deep thought, before he answered me. Finely he said, that +modern science had not fully demonstrated yet the direct bearing +of water on corn. In some cases it might and probably did +stimulate 'em to greater luxuriance, and then again a great flow +of water might retard their growth. + +Sez I, anxiously, "Then you'd advise me to go there with him?" + +"Yes," sez he, "on the hull, I advise you to go." + +Them words I reported to Josiah, and sez I in anxious axents, "Dr. +Gale advises us to go." + +And Josiah sez, "I guess I shan't mind what that old fool sez." + +Them wuz my pardner's words, much as I hate to tell on 'em. But +from day to day I kep' it stiddy before him, how dang'r'us it wuz +to go ag'inst a doctor's advice. And from day to day he would +scorf at the plan. And I, ev'ry now and then, and mebby oftener, +would get him a extra good meal, and attack him on the subject +immegatly afterwards. But all in vain. And I see that when he +had that immovible sotness onto him, one extra meal wouldn't +soften or molify him. No, I see plain I must make a more voyalent +effort. And I made it. For three stiddy days I put before that +man the best vittles that these hands could make, or this brain +could plan. + +And at the end of the 3d day I gently tackled him agin on the +subject, and his state wuz such, bland, serene, happified, that he +consented without a parlay. And so it wuz settled that the next +summer we wuz to go to Saratoga. And he began to count on it and +make preparation in a way that I hated to see. + +Yes, from the very minute that our two minds wuz made up to go to +Saratoga Josiah Allen wuz set on havin' sunthin new and uneek in +the way of dress and whiskers. I looked coldly on the idee of +puttin' a gay stripe down the legs of the new pantaloons I made +for him, and broke it up, also a figured vest. I went through +them two crisises and came out triumphent. + +Then he went and bought a new bright pink necktie with broad long +ends which he intended to have float out, down the front of his +vest. And I immegatly took it for the light-colored blocks in my +silk log-cabin bedquilt. Yes, I settled the matter of that pink +neck-gear with a high hand and a pair of shears. And Josiah sez +now that he bought it for that purpose, for the bedquilt, because +he loves to see a dressy quilt, -- sez he always enjoys seein' a +cabin look sort o' gay. But good land! he didn't. He intended +and calculated to wear that neck-tie into Saratoga, -- a sight for +men and angels, if I hadn't broke it up. + +But in the matter of whiskers, there I was powerless. He trimmed +'em (unbeknow to me) all off the side of his face, them good +honerable side whiskers of hisen, that had stood by him for years +in solemnity and decency, and begun to cultivate a little patch on +the end of his chin. I argued with him, and talked well on the +subject, eloquent, but it wuz of no use, I might as well have +argued with the wind in March. + +He said, he wuz bound on goin' into Saratoga with a fashionable +whisker, come what would. + +And then I sithed, and he sez, -- " You have broke up my pantaloons, +my vest, and my neck-tie, you have ground me down onto plain +broadcloth, but in the matter of whiskers I am firm! Yes!" sez he +"on these whiskers I take my stand!" + +And agin I sithed heavy, and I sez in a dretful impressive way, as +I looked on 'em, "Josiah Allen, remember you are a father and a +grandfather!" + +And he sez firmly, "If I wuz a great-grandfather I would trim my +whiskers in jest this way, that is if I wuz a goin' to set up to +be fashionable and a goin' to Saratoga for my health." + +And I groaned kinder low to myself, and kep' hopin' that mebby +they wouldn't grow very fast, or that some axident would happen to +'em, that they would get afire or sunthin'. But they didn't. And +they grew from day to day luxurient in length, but thin. And his +watchful care kep' 'em from axident, and I wuz too high princepled +to set fire to 'em when he wuz asleep, though sometimes, on a +moonlight night, I was tempted to, sorely tempted. + +But I didn't, and they grew from day to day, till they wuz the +curiusest lookin' patch o' whiskers that I ever see. And when we +sot out for Saratoga, they wuz jest about as long as a shavin' +brush, and looked some like one. There wuz no look of a +class-leader, and a perfesser about 'em, and I told him so. But +he worshiped 'em, and gloried in the idee of goin' afar to show +'em off. + +But the neighbors received the news that we wuz goin' to a +waterin' place coldly, or with ill-concealed envy. + +Uncle Jonas Bently told us he shouldn't think we would want to go +round to waterin' troughs at our age. + +And I told him it wuzn't a waterin' trough, and if it wuz, I +thought our age wuz jest as good a one as any, to go to it. + +He had the impression that Saratoga wuz a immense waterin' trough +where the country all drove themselves summers to be watered. He +is deef as a Hemlock post, and I yelled up at him jest as loud as +I dast for fear of breakin' open my own chest, that the water got +into us, instid of our gettin' into the water, but I didn't make +him understand, for I hearn afterwards of his sayin' that, as nigh +as he could make out we all got into the waterin' trough and wuz +watered. + +The school teacher, a young man, with long, small lims, and some +pimpley on the face, but well meanin', he sez to me: "Saratoga is +a beautiful spah." + +And I sez warmly, "It aint no such thing, it is a village, for I +have seen a peddler who went right through it, and watered his +horses there, and he sez it is a waterin' place, and a village." + +"Yes," sez he, "it is a beautiful village, a modest retiren city, +and at the same time it is the most noted spah on this continent." + +I wouldn't contend with him for it wuz on the stoop of the meetin' +house, and I believe in bein' reverent. But I knew it wuzn't no +"spah," -- that had a dreadful flat sound to me. And any way I +knew I should face its realities soon and know all about it. Lots +of wimen said that for anybody who lived right on the side of a +canal, and had two good, cisterns on the place, and a well, they +didn't see why I should feel in a sufferin' condition for any more +water; and if I did, why didn't I ketch rain water? + +Such wuz some of the deep arguments they brung up aginst my +embarkin' on this enterprise, they talked about it sights and +sights; -- why, it lasted the neighbors for a stiddy conversation, +till along about the middle of the winter. Then the Minister's +wife bought a new alpacky dress -- unbeknown to the church till it +wuz made up -- and that kind o' drawed their minds off o' me for a +spell. + +Aunt Polly Pixley wuz the only one who received the intelligence +gladly. And she thought she would go too. She had been kinder +run down and most bed rid for years. And she had a idee the water +might help her. And I encouraged Aunt Polly in the idee, for she +wuz well off. Yes, Mr. and Miss Pixley wuz very well off though +they lived in a little mite of a dark, low, lonesome house, with +some tall Pollard willows in front of the door in a row, and jest +acrost the road from a grave-yard. + +Her husband had been close and wuzn't willin' to have any other +luxury or means of recreation in the house only a bass viol, that +had been his father's -- he used to play on that for hours and +hours. I thought that wuz one reason why Polly wuz so nervous. I +said to Josiah that it would have killed me outright to have that +low grumblin' a goin' on from day to day, and to look at them tall +lonesome willows and grave stuns. + +But, howsumever, Polly's husband had died durin' the summer, and +Polly parted with the bass viol the day after the funeral. She +got out some now, and wuz quite wrought up with the idee of goin' +to Saratoga. + +But Sister Minkley; sister in the church and sister-in-law by +reason of Wbitefield, sez to me, that she should think I would +think twice before I danced and waltzed round waltzes. + +And I sez, "I haint thought of doin' it, I haint thought of +dancin' round or square or any other shape." + +Sez she, "You have got to, if you go to Saratoga." + +Sez I, "Not while life remains in this frame." + +And old Miss Bobbet came up that minute -- it wuz in the store +that we were a talkin' -- and sez she, "It seems to me, Josiah +Allen's wife, that you are too old to wear low-necked dresses and +short sleeves." + +"And I should think you'd take cold a goin' bareheaded," sez Miss +Luman Spink who wuz with her. + +Sez I, lookin' at 'em coldly, "Are you lunys or has softness begun +on your brains?" + +"Why," sez they, "you are talking about goin' to Saratoga, hain't +you?" + +"Yes," sez I. + +"Well then you have got to wear 'em," says Miss Bobbet. "They +don't let anybody inside of the incorporation without they have +got on a low-necked dress and short sleeves." + +"And bare-headed," sez Miss Spink; "if they have' got a thing on +their heads they won't let 'em in." + +Sez I, "I don't believe it" + +Sez Miss Bobbet, "It is so, for I hearn it, and hearn it straight. +James Robbets's wife's sister had a second cousin who lived +neighbor to a woman whose niece had been there, been right there +on the spot. And Celestine Bobbet, Uncle Ephraim's Celestine, +hearn it from James'es wife when she wuz up there last spring, it +come straight. They all have to go in low necks." + +"And not a mite of anything on their heads," says Miss Spink. + +Sez I in sarcastical axents, "Do men have to go in low necks too?" + +"No," says Miss Bobbet. "But they have to have the tails of their +coats kinder pinted. Why," sez she, "I hearn of a man that had +got clear to the incorporation and they wouldn't let him in +because his coat kinder rounded off round the bottom, so he went +out by the side of the road and pinned up his coat tails, into a +sort of a pinted shape, and good land the incorporation let him +right in, and never said a word." + +I contended that these things wuzn't so, but I found it wuz the +prevailin' opinion. For when I went to see the dressmaker about +makin' me a dress for the occasion, I see she felt just like the +rest about it. My dress wuz a good black alpacky. I thought I +would have it begun along in the edge of the winter, when she +didn't have so much to do, and also to have it done on time. We +laid out to start on the follerin' July, and I felt that I wanted +everything ready. + +I bought the dress the 7th day of November early in the forenoon, +the next day after my pardner consented to go, and give 65 cents a +yard for it, double wedth. I thought I could get it done on time, +dressmakers are drove a good deal. But I felt that a dressmaker +could commence a dress in November and get it done the follerin' +July, without no great strain bein' put onto her; and I am fur +from bein' the one to put strains onto wimmen, and hurry 'em +beyend their strength. But I felt Almily had time to make it on +honor and with good buttonholes. + +"Well," she sez, the first thing after she had unrolled the +alpacky, and held it up to the light to see if it was firm -- sez +she: + +"I s'pose you are goin' to have it made with a long train, and low +neck and short sleeves, and the waist all girted down to a taper?" + +I wuz agast at the idee, and to think Alminy should broach it to +me, and I give her a piece of my mind that must have lasted her +for days and days. It wuz a long piece, and firm as iron. But +she is a woman who likes to have the last word and carry out her +own idees, and she insisted that nobody was allowed in Saratoga -- +that they wuz outlawed, and laughed at if they didn't have trains +and low necks, and little mites of waists no bigger than +pipe-stems. + +Sez I, "Alminy Hagidone, do you s'pose that I, a woman of my age, +and a member of the meetin' house, am a goin' to wear a low-necked +dress?" + +"Why not?," sez she, "it is all the fashion and wimmen as old agin +as you be wear 'em." + +Well, sez I, "It is a shame and a disgrace if they do, to say +nothin' of the wickedness of it. Who do you s'pose wants to see +their old skin and bones? It haint nothin' pretty anyway. And as +fer the waists bein' all girted up and drawed in, that is nothin' +but crushed bones and flesh and vitals, that is just crowdin' down +your insides into a state o' disease and deformity, torturin' your +heart down so's the blood can't circulate, and your lungs so's you +can't breathe, it is nothin' but slow murder anyway, and if I ever +take it into my head to kill myself, Alminy Hagidone, I haint a +goin' to do it in a way of perfect torture and torment to me, I'd +ruther be drownded." + +She quailed, and I sez, "I am one that is goin' to take good long +breaths to the very last." She see I wuz like iron aginst the +idee of bein' drawed in, and tapered, and she desisted. I s'pose +I did look skairful. But she seemed still to cling to the idee of +low necks and trains, and she sez sort a rebukingly: + +"You ortn't to go to Saratoga if you haint willin' to do as the +rest do. I spose," sez she dreamily, "the streets are full of +wimmen a walkin' up and down with long trains a hangin' down and +sweepin' the streets, and ev'ry one on 'em with low necks and +short sleeves, and all on 'em a flirting with some man" + +"Truly," sez I, "if that is so, that is why the idee come to me. +I am needed there. I have a high mission to perform about. But I +don't believe it is so." + +"Then you won't have it made with a long train?" sez she, a holdin' +up a breadth of the alpacky in front of me, to measure the skirt. + +"No mom!" sez I, and there wuz both dignity and deep resolve in +that "mom." It wuz as firm and stern principled a "mom" as I ever +see, though I say it that shouldn't. And I see it skairt her. +She measured off the breadths kinder trembly, and seemed so +anxious to pacify me that she got it a leetle shorter in the back +than it wuz in the front. And (for the same reason) it fairly +clicked me in the neck it wuz so high, and the sleeves wuz that +long that I told Josiah Allen (in confidence) I was tempted to +knit some loops across the bottom of 'em and wear 'em for mits. + +But I didn't, and I didn't change the dress neither. Thinkses I, +mebby it will have a good moral effect on them other old wimmen +there. Thinkses I, when they see another woman melted and +shortened and choked fur principle's sake, mebby they will pause +in their wild careers. + +Wall, this wuz in November, and I wuz to have the dress, if it wuz +a possible thing, by the middle of April, so's to get it home in +time to sew some lace in the neck. And so havin' everything +settled about goin' I wuz calm in my frame most all the time, and +so wuz my pardner. + +And right here, let me insert this one word of wisdom for the +special comfort of my sect and yet it is one that may well be laid +to heart by the more opposite one. If your pardner gets restless +and oneasy and middlin' cross, as pardners will be anon, or even +oftener -- start them off on a tower. A tower will in 9 cases out +of 10 lift 'em out of their oneasiness, their restlessness and +their crossness. + +Why this is so I cannot tell, no more than I can explain other +mysteries of creation, but I know it is so. I know they will come +home more placider, more serener, and more settled-downer. Why I +have known a short tower to Slab City or Loontown act like a charm +on my pardner, when crossness wuz in his mean and snappishness wuz +present with him. I have known him to set off with the mean of a +lion and come back with the liniment of a lamb. Curious, haint +it? + +And jest the prospect of a tower ahead is a great help to a woman +in rulin' and keepin' a pardner straight and right in his +liniments and his acts. Somehow jest the thought of a tower sort +a lifts him up in mind, and happifys him, and makes him easier to +quell, and pardners must be quelled at times, else there would be +no livin' with 'em. This is known to all wimmen companions and +and men too. Great great is the mystery of pardners. + + + + +II. + +ARDELLA TUTT AND HER MOTHER. + + +But to resoom and continue on. I was a settin' one day, after it +wuz all decided, and plans laid on; I wuz a settin' by the fire a +mendin' one of Josiah's socks. I wuz a settin' there, as soft and +pliable in my temper as the woosted I wuz a darnin' 'em with, my +Josiah at the same time a peacefelly sawin' wood in the +wood-house, when I heard a rap at the door and I riz up and opened +it, and there stood two perfect strangers, females. I, with a +perfect dignity and grace (and with the sock still in my left +hand) asked 'em to set down, and consequently they sot. Then +ensued a slight pause durin' which my two gray eyes roamed over +the females before me. + +The oldest one wuz very sharp in her face and had a pair of small +round eyes that seemed when they were sot onto you to sort a bore +into you like two gimlets. Her nose was very sharp and defient, +as if it wuz constantly sayin' to itself, "I am a nose to be +looked up to, I am a nose to be respected, and feared if +necessary." Her chin said the same thing, and her lips which wuz +very thin, and her elbow, which wuz very sharp. + +Her dress was a stiff sort of a shinin' poplin, made tight acrost +the chest and elboes. And her hat had some stiff feathers in it +that stood up straight and sort a sharp lookin'. She had a long +sharp breast-pin sort a stabbed in through the front of her stiff +standin' collar, and her knuckles sot out through her firm lisle +thread gloves, her umberell wuz long and wound up hard, to that +extent I have never seen before nor sense. She wuz, take it all +in all, a hard sight, and skairful. + +The other one wuzn't no more like her in looks than a soft fat +young cabbage head is like the sharp bean pole that it grows up by +the side on, in the same garden. She wuz soft in her complexion, +her lips, her cheeks, her hands, and as I mistrusted at that first +minute, and found out afterwards, soft in her head too. Her dress +wuz a loose-wove parmetty, full in the waist and sort a drabbly +round the bottom. Her hat wuz drab-colored felt with some loose +ribbon bows a hangin' down on it, and some soft ostridge tips. +She had silk mits on and her hands wuz fat and kinder +moist-lookin'. Her eyes wuz very large and round, and blue, and +looked sort o' dreamy and wanderin' and there wuz a kind of a +wrapped smile on her face all the time. She had a roll of paper +in her hand and I didn't dislike her looks a mite. + +Finally the oldest female opened her lips, some as a steel trap +would open sudden and kinder sharp, and sez she: "I am Miss Deacon +Tutt, of Tuttville, and this is my second daughter Ardelia. +Cordelia is my oldest, and I have 4 younger than Ardelia." + +I bowed real polite and said, "I wuz glad to make the acquaintance +of the hull 7 on 'em." I can be very genteel when I set out, +almost stylish. + +"I s'pose," says she, "I am talkin' to Josiah Allen's wife?" + +I gin her to understand that that wuz my name and my station, and +she went on, and sez she: "I have hearn on you through my +husband's 2d cousin, Cephas Tutt." + +"Cephas," sez she, "bein' wrote to by me on the subject of +Ardelia, the same letter containin' seven poems of hern, and on +bein' asked to point out the quickest way to make her name and +fame known to the world at large, wrote back that he havin' always +dealt in butter and lard, wuzn't up to the market price in poetry, +and that you would be a good one to go to for advice. And so," +sez she a pointin' to a bag she carried on her arm (a hard lookin' +bag made of crash with little bullets and knobs of embroidery on +it), "and so we took this bag full of Ardelia's poetry and come on +the mornin' train, Cephas'es letter havin' reached us at nine +o'clock last night. I am a woman of business." + +The bag would hold about 4 quarts and it wuz full. I looked at it +and sithed. + +"I see," sez she, "that you are sorry that we didn't bring more +poetry with us. But we thought that this little batch would give +you a idee of what a mind she has, what a glorious, soarin' genus +wuz in front of you, and we could bring more the next time we +come." + +I sithed agin, three times, but Miss Tutt didn't notice 'em a mite +no more'n they'd been giggles or titters. She wouldn't have took +no notice of them. She wuz firm and decided doin' her own errent, +and not payin' no attention to anything, nor anybody else. + +"Ardelia, read the poem you have got under your arm to Miss Allen! +The bag wuz full of her longer ones," sez she, "but I felt that I +must let you hear her poem on spring. It is a gem. I felt it +would be wrongin' you, not to give you that treat. Read it +Ardelia." + +I see Ardelia wuz used to obeyin' her ma. She opened the sheet to +once, and begun. + +Jest the minute Ardelia stopped readin' Miss Tatt says proudly: +"There! haint that a remarkable poem,?" + +Sez I, calmly, "Yes it is a remarkable one." + +"Did you ever hear anything like it?" says she, triumphly. + +"No," sez I honestly, "I never did." + +"Ardelia, read the poem on Little Ardelia Cordelia; give Miss +Allen the treat of hearin' that beautiful thing." + +I sort a sithed low to myself; it wuz more of a groan than a +common sithe, but Miss Tutt didn't heed it, she kep' right on -- + +"I have always brought up my children to make other folks happy, +all they can, and in rehearsin' this lovely and remarkable poem, +Ardelia will be not only makin' you perfectly happy, givin' you a +rich intellectual feast, that you can't often have, way out here +in the country, fur from Tuttville; but she will also be attendin' +to the business that brought us here. I have always fetched my +children up to combine joy and business; weld 'em together like +brass and steel. Ardelia, begin!" + +So Ardelia commenced agin'. It wuz wrote on a big sheet of paper +and a runnin' vine wuz a runnin' all 'round the edge of the paper, +made with a pen. + +Jest as soon as Ardelia stopped rehearsin' the verses, Miss Tutt +sez agin to me: + +"Haint that a most remarkable poem?" + +And agin I sez calmly, and trutbfully, "Yes, it is a very +remarkable one!" + +"And now," sez Miss Tutt, plungin' her hand in the bag, and +drawin' out a sheet of paper, "to convince you that Ardelia has +always had this divine gift of poesy -- that it is not, all the +effect of culture and high education -- let me read to you a poem +she wrote when she wuz only a mere child," and Miss Tutt read: + + "LINES ON A CAT + + "WRITTEN BY ARDELIA TUTT, + "At the age of fourteen years, two months and eight days. + + "Oh Cat! Sweet Tabby cat of mine; + 6 months of age has passed o'er thee, + And I would not resign, resign + The pleasure that I find in you. + Dear old cat!" + +"Don't you think," sez Miss Tutt, "that this poem shows a fund of +passion, a reserve power of passion and constancy, remarkable in +one so young?" + +"Yes," sez I reasonably, "no doubt she liked the cat. And," sez +I, wantin' to say somethin' pleasant and agreeable to her, "no +doubt it was a likely cat." + +"Oh the cat itself is of miner importance," sez Miss Tutt. "We +will fling the cat to the winds. It's of my daughter I would +speak. I simply handled the cat to show the rare precocious +intellect. Oh! how it gushed out in the last line in the +unconquerable burst of repressed passion -- `Dear old cat!' +Shakespeare might have wrote that line, do you not think so?" + +"No doubt he might," sez I, calmly, "but he didn't." + +I see she looked mad and I hastened to say: "He wuzn't aquainted +with the cat." + +She looked kinder mollyfied and continued: + +"Ardelia dashes off things with a speed that would astonish a mere +common writer. Why she dashed off thirty-nine verses once while +she wuz waitin' for the dish water to bile, and sent 'em right off +to the printer, without glancin' at 'em agin.' + +"I dare say so," sez I, "I should judge so by the sound on 'em." + +"Out of envy and jealousy, the rankest envy, and the shearest +jealousy, them verses wuz sent back with the infamous request that +she should use 'em for curl papers. But she sot right down and +wrote forty-eight verses on a `Cruel Request,' wrote 'em inside of +eighteen minutes. She throws off things, Ardelia does, in half an +hour, that it would take other poets, weeks and weeks to write." + +"I persume so," sez I, "I dare persume to say, they never could +write 'em." + +"And now," sez Miss Tutt, "the question is, will you put Ardelia +on the back of that horse that poets ride to glory on? Will you +lift her onto the back of that horse, and do it at once? I +require nothin' hard of you," sez she, a borin' me through and +through with her eyes. "It must be a joy to you, Josiah Allen's +wife, a rare joy, to be the means of bringin' this rare genius +before the public. I ask nothin' hard of you, I only ask that you +demand, demand is the right word, not ask; that would be grovelin' +trucklin' folly, but demand that the public that has long ignored +my daugther Ardelia's claim to a seat amongst the immortal poets, +demand them, compel them to pause, to listen, and then seat her +there, up, up on the highest, most perpendiciler pinnacle of +fame's pillow. Will you do this?" + +I sat in deep dejection and my rockin' chair, and knew not what to +say -- and Miss Tutt went on: + +"We demand more than fame, deathless, immortal fame for 'em. We +want money, wealth for 'em, and want it at once! We want it for +extra household expenses, luxuries, clothing, jewelry, charity, +etc. If we enrich the world with this rare genius, the world must +enrich us with its richest emmolients. Will you see that we have +it! Will you at once do as I asked you to? Will you seat her +immegately where I want her sot? + +Sez I, considerin', "I can't get her up there alone, I haint +strong enough." Sez I, sort a mekanikly, "I have got the +rheumatez." + +"So you scoff me do you? I came to you to get bread, am I to get +worse than a stun -- a scoff?" + +"I haint gin you no scoff," sez I, a spunkin' up a little, "I +haint thought on it. I like Ardelia and wish her well, but I +can't do merikles, I can't compel the public to like things if +they don't." + +Sez Miss Tutt, "You are jealous of her, you hate her." + +"No, I don't," sez I, "I haint jealous of her, and I like her +looks first-rate. I love a pretty young girl," sez I candidly, +"jest as I love a fresh posy with the dew still on it, a dainty +rose-bud with the sweet fragrance layin' on its half-folded heart. +I love 'em," sez I, a beginnin' to eppisode a little unbeknown to +me, "I love 'em jest as I love the soft unbroken silence of the +early spring mornin', the sun all palely tinted with rose and +blue, and the earth alayin' calm and unwoke-up, fresh and fair. I +love such a mornin' and such a life, for itself and for the +unwritten prophecis in it. And when I see genius in such a sweet, +young life, why it makes me feel as it duz to see through all the +tender prophetic beauty of the mornin' skies, a big white dove a +soarin' up through the blue heavens." + +Sez Miss Tutt, "You see that in Ardelia, but you wont own it, you +know you do." + +"No!" sez I, "I would love to tell you that I see it in Ardelia; I +would honest, but I can't look into them mornin' skies and say I +see a white dove there, when I don't see nothin' more than a plump +pullet, a jumpin' down from the fence or a pickin' round calmly in +the back door-yard. Jest as likely the hen is, as the white dove, +jest as honerable, but you mustn't confound the two together." + +"A hen," sez Miss Tutt bitterly. "To confound my Ardelia with a +hen! And I don't think there wuz ever a more ironieler `hen' than +that wuz, or a scornfuller one." + +"Why," sez I reasonably. "Hens are necessary and useful in any +position, both walkin' and settin', and layin'. You can't get'em +in any position hardly, but what they are useful and respectable, +only jest flyin'. Hens can't fly. Their wings haint shaped for +it. They look some like a dove's wings on the outside, the same +feathers, the same way of stretchin' 'em out. But there is +sunthin lackin' in 'em, some heaven-given capacity for soarin' an +for flight that the hens don't have. And it makes trouble, sights +and sights of trouble when hens try to fly, try to, and can't! + +"At the same time it is hard for a dove to settle down in a back +yard and stay there, hard and tegus. She can and duz sometimes, +but never till after her wings have been clipped in some way. +Poor little dove! I am always sorry for 'em to see 'em a walkin' +round there, a wantin' to fly -- a not forgettin' how it seemed to +have their wings soarin' up through the clear sky, and the rush of +the pure liquid windwaves a sweepin' aginst 'em, as they riz up, +up, in freedom, and happiness, and glory. Poor little creeters. + +"Yes, but doves can, if you clip their wings, settle down and +walk, but hens CAN'T fly, not for any length of time they can't. +No amount of stimulatin' poultices applied to the ends of their +tail feathers and wings can ever make 'em fly. They can't; it +haint their nater. They can make nests, and fill them with pretty +downy chicks, they can be happy and beautiful in life and mean; +they can spend their lives in jest as honerable and worthy a way +as if they wuz a flyin' round, and make a good honerable +appearance from day to day, till they begin to flop their wings, +and fly -- then their mean is not beautiful and inspirin'; no, it +is fur from it. It is tuff to see 'em, tuff to see the floppin', +tuff to see their vain efforts to soar through the air, tuff to +see 'em fall percepitously down onto the ground agin. For they +must come there in the end; they are morally certain to. + +"Now Ardelia is a sweet pretty lookin' girl, she can set down in a +cushioned arm-chair by a happy fireside, with pretty baby faces a +clusterin' around her and some man's face like the sun a +reflectin' back the light of her happy heart. But she can't sit +up on the pinnacle of fame's pillow. I don't believe she can ever +get up there, I don't. Honestly speakin', I don't." + +"Envy!" sez Miss Tutt, "glarin', shameless envy! You don't want +Ardelia to rise! You don't want her to mount that horse I spoke +of; you don't want to own that you see genius in her. But you do, +Josiah Allen's wife, you know you do -- " + +"No," sez I, "I don't see it. I see the sweetness of pretty +girlhood, the beauty and charm of openin' life, but I don't see +nothin' else, I don't, honest. I don't believe she has got +genius," sez I, "seein' you put the question straight to me and +depend a answer; seein' her future career depends on her choice +now, I must tell you that I believe she would succeed better in +the millionary trade or the mantilly maker's than she will in +tryin' to mount the horse you speak on. + +"Why," sez I, candidly, "some folks can't get up on that horse, +their legs haint strong enough. And if they do manage to get on, +it throws 'em, and they lay under the heels for life. I don't +want to see Ardelia there, I don't want to see her maimed and +lamed and stunted so early in the mornin' of life, by a kick from +that animal, for she can't ride it," sez I, "honestly she can't. + +"There is nothin' so useless in life, and so sort a wearin' as to +be a lookin' for sunthin' that haint there. And when you pretend +it is there when it haint, you are addin' iniquity to uselessness; +so if you'll take my advice, the advice of a wellwisher, you will +stop lookin', for I tell you plain that it haint there." + +Sez Miss Tutt, "Josiah Allen's wife, you have for reasens best +known to your conscience baulked my hopes of a speedy immortality. +You have willfully tried to break down my hopes of an immense, +immediate income to flow out of them poems for luxuries, jewelry, +charity, etc. But I can at least claim this at your hands, I +demand honesty. Tell me honestly what you yourself think of them +poems." + +Sez I (gettin' up sort a quick and goin' into the buttery, and +bringin' out a little basket), "Here are some beautiful sweet +apples, won't you have one?" + +"Apples, at such a time as this;" sez Miss Tutt + +"When the slumberin' world trembles before the advancin' tread of +a new poet -- When the heavens are listenin' intently to ketch the +whispers of an Ardelia's fate -- Sweet apples! in such a time as +this!" sez she. But she took two. + +"I demand the truth," sez she. "And you are a base, trucklin' +coward, if you give it not." + +Sez I, tryin' to carry off the subject and the apples into the +buttery; "Poetry ort to have pains took with it." + +"Jealousy!" sez Miss Tutt. "Jealousy might well whisper this. +Envy, rank envy might breathe the suspicion that Ardelia haint +been took pains with. But I can see through it," sez she. "I can +see through it." + +"Well," sez I, wore out, "if they belonged to me, and if she wuz +my girl, I would throw the verses into the fire, and set her to a +trade." + +She stood for a minute and bored me through and through with them +eyes. Why it seemed as if there wuz two holes clear through my +very spirit, and sole; she partly lifted that fearful lookin' +umberell as if to pierce me through and through; it wuz a fearful +seen. + +At last she turned, and flung the apple she wuz a holdin' onto the +floor at my feet -- and sez she, "I scorn 'em, and you too." And +she kinder stomped her feet and sez, "I fling off the dust I have +gethered here, at your feet." + +Now my floor wuz clean and looked like yeller glass, almost, it +wuz so shinin' and spotless, and I resented the idee of her sayin' +that she collected dust off from it. But I didn't say nothin' +back. She had the bag of poetry on her arm, and I didn't feel +like addin' any more to her troubles. + +But Ardelia, after her mother had swept out ahead, turned round +and held out her hand, and smiled a sweet but ruther of a +despondent and sorrowful smile, and I kissed her warmly. I like +Ardelia. And what I said, I said for her good, and she knew it. +I like Ardelia. + +Well, Miss Tutt and Ardelia went from our house to Eben Pixley's. +They are distant relatives of hern, and live about 3 quarters of a +mile from us. The Pixleys think everything of Ardelia but they +can't bear her mother. There has been difficulties in the family. + +But Ardelia stayed there mor'n two weeks right along. She haint +very happy to home I believe. And before she went back home it +wuz arranged that she should teach the winter's school and board +to Miss Pixley's. But Miss Pixley wuz took sick with the tyfus +before she had been there two weeks -- and, for all the world, if +the deestrict didn't want us to board her. Josiah hadn't much to +do, so he could carry her back and forth in stormy weather, and it +wuz her wish to come. And it wuz Josiah's wish too, for the pay +wuz good, and the work light -- for him. And so I consented after +a parlay. + +But I didn't regret it. She is a good little creeter and no more +like her mother than a feather bed is like a darnin' needle. I +like Ardelia: so does Josiah. + + + +III. + +THE CHERITY OF THE JONESVILLIANS. + + +We have been havin' a pound party here in Jonesville. There wuz a +lot of children left without any father or mother, nobody only an +old grandma to take care of 'em, and she wuz half bent with the +rheumatiz, and had a swelled neck, and lumbago and fits. + +They lived in an old tumble-down house jest outside of Jonesville. +The father wuz, I couldn't deny, a shiftless sort of a chap, +good-natured, always ready to obleege a neighbor, but he hadn'nt +no faculty. And I don't know, come to think of it, as anybody is +any more to blame if they are born without a faculty, than if they +are born with only one eye. Faculty is one of the things that you +can't buy. + +He loved to hunt. That is, he loved to hunt some kinds of things. +He never loved to hunt stiddy, hard work, and foller on the trail +of it till he evertook success and captured it. No, he druther +hunt after catamounts and painters, in woods where catamounts +haint mounted, and painters haint painted sence he wuz born. + +He generally killed nothin' bigger than red squirrels and chipmunks. +The biggest game he ever brought down wuz himself. He shot himself +one cold day in the fall of the year. He wuz gettin' over a brush +fence, they s'posed the gun hit against somethin' and went off, for +they found him a layin' dead at the bottom of the fence. + +I always s'posed that the shock of his death comin' so awful +sudden unto her, killed his wife. She had been sick for a long +spell, she had consumption and dropsy, and so forth, and so forth, +for a long time, and after he wuz brought in dead, she didn't live +a week. She thought her eyes of him, for no earthly reason as I +could ever see. How strange, how strange a dispensation of +Providence it duz seem, that some women love some men, and vicy +versey and the same. + +But she did jest about worship him, and she died whisperin' his +name, and reachin' out her hands as if she see him jest ahead of +her. And I told Josiah I didn't know but she did. I shouldn't +wonder a mite if she did see him, for there is only the veil of +mystery between us and the other world at any time, and she had +got so nigh to it, that I s'pose it got so thin that she could +see through it. + +Just as you can see through the blue haze that lays before our +forest in Injun summer. Come nigh up to it and you can see the +silvery trunks of the maples and the red sumac leaves, and the +bright evergreens, and the forms of the happy hunters a passin' +along under the glint of the sunbeams and the soft shadows. + +They died in Injun summer. I made a wreath myself of the +bright-colored leaves to lay on their coffins. Dead leaves, dead +to all use and purpose here, and yet with the bright mysterious +glow upon them that put me in mind of some immortal destiny and +blossoming beyond our poor dim vision. Jane Smedley wuz a good +woman, and so wuz Jim, good but shiftless. + +But I made the same wreath for her and Jim, and the strange mellow +light lay on both of 'em, makin' me think in spite of myself of +some happy sunrisin' that haply may dawn on some future huntin' +ground, where poor Jim Smedley even, may strike the trail of +success and happiness, hid now from the sight of Samantha, hid +from Josiah. + +Wall, they died within a week's time of each other, and left nine +children, the oldest one of 'em not quite fifteen. She, the +oldest one, wuz a good girl, only she had the rickets so that when +she walked, she seemed to walk off all over the house backwards, +and sideways, and every way, but when she sot down, she wuz a good +stiddy girl, and faithful; she took after her mother, and her +mother took after her grandmother, so there wuz three takin' after +each other, one right after the other. + +Jane wuz a good, faithful, hard-workin' creeter when she wuz well, +brought up her children good as she could, learnt 'em the +catechism, and took in all kinds of work to earn a little +somethin' towards gettin' a home for 'em; she and her mother both +did, her mother lived with 'em, and wuz a smart old woman, too, +for one that wuz pretty nigh ninety. And she wuzn't worrysome +much, only about one thing -- she wanted a home, wanted a home +dretfully. Some wimmen are so; she had moved round so much, from +one poor old place to another, that she sort o' hankered after +bein' settled down into a stiddy home. + +Wall, there wuz eight children younger than Marvilla, that wuz the +oldest young girl's name. Eight of 'em, countin' each pair of +twins as two, as I s'pose they ort. The Town buried the father +and mother, which wuz likely and clever in it, but after that it +wouldn't give only jest so much a week, which wuz very little, +because it said, Town did, that they could go to the poor-house, +they could be supported easier there. + +I don't know as the Town could really be blamed for sayin' it, and +yet it seemed kinder mean in it, the Town wuz so big, and the +children, most of 'em, wuz so little. + +But any way, it wuz jest sot on it, and there wuz the end of it, +for you might jest as well dispute the wind as to dispute the Town +when it gets sot. + +Wall, the old grandma said she would die in the streets before she +would go to the poor-house. She had come from a good family in +the first place, + +They say she run away and left a good home and got married, and +did dretful poor in the married state. He waz shiftless and didn't +have nothin' and didn't lay up any. And she didn't keep any of +her old possessions only jest her pride. She kept that, or enough +of it to say that she would die on the road before she would go to +the poor-house. And once I see her cry she wanted a home so bad. + +And lots of folks blamed her for it, blamed the old woman awfully. +They said pride wuz so wicked. Wimmen who would run like deers if +company came when they wuzn't dressed up slick, they would say the +minute they got back into the room, all out of breath with hurryin' +into their best clothes, they'd say a pantin' "That old woman ought +to be made to go to the poorhouse, to take the pride out of her, +pride wuz so awfully, dretfully wicked, and it wuz a shame that she +wuz so ongrateful as to want a home of her own." And then they +would set down and rest. + +Wall, the family wuz in a sufferin' state. The Town allowed 'em +one dollar a week. But how wuz ten human beings to live on a +dollar a week. The children worked every chance they got, but +they couldn't earn enough to keep 'em in shoes, let alone other +clothin' and vittles. And the old house wuz too cold for 'em to +stay in durin' the cold weather, it wuz for Grandma Smedley, +anyway, if the children could stand it she couldn't. And what wuz +to be done. A cold winter wuz a cumin' on, and it wouldn't delay +a minute because Jim Smedley had got shot, and his wife had +follered him, into, let us hope, a happier huntin' ground than he +had ever found in earthly forests. + +Wall, I proposed to have a pound party for 'em. I said they might +have it to our house if they wanted it, but if they thought they +wanted it in a more central place (our house wuz quite a little to +one side), why we could have it to the schoolhouse. + +I proposed to Josiah the first one. He wuz a settin' by the fire +relapsed into silence. It wuz a cold night outside, but the red +curtains wuz down at our sitting-room winders, shettin' out the +cold drizzlin' storm of hail and snow that wuz a deseendin' onto +the earth. The fire burned up warm and bright, and we sot there +in our comfortable home, with the teakettle singin' on the stove, +and the tea-table set out cosy and cheerful, for Josiah had been +away and I had waited supper for him. + +As I sot there waitin' for the tea-kettle to bile (and when I say +bile, I mean bile, I don't, mean simmer) the thought of the +Smedleys would come in. The warm red curtains would keep the +storm out, but they couldn't keep the thought of the children, and +the feeble old grandmother out of the room. They come right in, +through the curtains, and the firelight, and everything, and sot +right down by me and hanted me. + +And what curious creeters thoughts be, haint they? and oncertain, +too. You may make all your plans to get away from 'em. You may +shet up your doors and winders, and set with a veil on and an +umbrell up - but good land! how easy they jest ontackle the doors +and windows, with no sounds of ontacklin' and come right in by +you. + +First you know there they be right by the side of you, under your +umbrell, under your veil, under your spectacles, a lookin' right +down into your soul, and a hantin' you. + +And then agin, when you expect to be hanted by 'em, lay out to, +why, they'll jest stand off somewhere else, and don't come nigh +you. Don't want to. Oncertain creeters, thoughts be, and +curious, curious where they come from, and how. + +Why, I got to thinkin' about it the other day, and I got lost, +some like children settin' on a log over a creek a ridin'; there +they be, and there the log is, but they don't seem to be there, +they seem to be a floatin' down the water. + +And there I wuz, a settin' in my rockin' chair, and I seemed to be +a floatin' down deep water, very deep. A thinkin' and a wonderin'. +A thinkin' how all through the ages what secrets God had told to +man when the time had come, and the reverent soul below was ready +to hear the low words whispered to his soul, and a wonderin' what +strange revelation God held now, ready to reveal when the soul +below had fitted itself to hear, and comprehend it. + +Ah! such mysteries as He will reveal to us if we will listen. If +we wait for God's voice. If we did not heed so much the confusing +clamor of the world's voices about us. Emulation, envy, anger, +strife, jealousy; if we turned our heads away from these discords, +and in the silence which is God's temple, listened, listened, -- +who knows the secrets He would make known to us? + +Secrets of the day, secrets of the night, the sunshine, the +lightning, the storm. The white glow of that wonderful light that +is not like the glow of the sun or of the moon, but yet lighteth +the world. That strange light that has a soul - that reads our +thoughts, translates our wishes, overleaps distance, carrying our +whispered words after holding our thoughts for ages, and then +unfoldin' 'em at will. What other wondrous mysteries lie +concealed, wrapped around by that soft pure flame, mysteries that +shall lie hidden until some inspired eye shall be waiting, looking +upward at the moment when God's hand shall draw back the shining +veil for an instant, and let him read the glowing secret. + +Secrets of language! shall some simple power, some symbol be +revealed, and the nations speak together? + +Secrets of song! shall some serene, harmonious soul catch the note +to celestial melodies? + +Secrets of sight! shall the eyes too dim now, see the faces of the +silent throngs that surround them, "the great cloud of witnesses"? + +Secrets of the green pathways that lead up through the blue silent +fields of space - shall we float from star to star? + +Secrets of holiness! shall earthly faces wear the pure light of +the immortals? + +But oh! who shall be the happy soul that shall be listening when +the time has fully come and He shall reveal His great secret? The +happy soul listening so intently that it shall catch the low, +clear whisper. + +Listening, maybe, through the sweet twilight shadows for the +wonderful secret, while the silver shallop of the moon is becalmed +over the high northern mountains, as if a fleet of heavenly guests +had floated down through the clear ocean waves of the sky to +listen too - to hear the wonderful heavenly secret revealed to man +- and a clear star looks out over the glowing rose of the western +heavens, looking down like God's eye, searching his soul, +searching if it be worthy of the great trust. + +Maybe it will be in the fresh dawning of the day, that the great +secret will grow bright and clear and luminous, as the dawning of +the light. + +Maybe it will be in the midst of the storm - a mighty voice borne +along by the breath of the wind and the thunder, clamoring and +demanding the hearer to listen. + +Oh! if we were only good enough, only pure enough, what might not +our rapt vision discern? + +But we know not where or when the time shall be fully come, but +who, who, shall be the happy soul that shall, at the time, be +listening? + +Oh! how deep, how strange the waters wuz, and how I floated away +on 'em, and how I didn't. For there I wuz a settin in my own +rockin' chair and there opposite me sot my own Josiah a whittlin', +for the "World" hadn't come, and he wuz restless and ill at ease, +and time hung heavy on his hands. + +There I sot the same Samantha - and the thought of the Smedleys, +the same old Smedleys, was a hantin' of me, the same old hant, and +I says to my Josiah, says I: "Josiah, I can't help thinkin' about +the Smedleys," says I. "What do you think about havin' a pound +party for 'em, and will you take holt, and do your part?" + +"Good land, Samantha! Are you crazy? Crazy as a loon? What +under the sun do you want to pound the Smedleys for? I should +think they had trouble enough without poundin' 'em. Why," says +he, "the old woman couldn't stand any poundin' at all, without +killin' her right out and out, and the childern haint over tough +any of 'em. Why, what has got into you? I never knew you to +propose anything of that wicked kind before. I sha'n't have +anything to do with it. If you want 'em pounded you must get +your own club and do your own poundin'." + +Says I, "I don't mean poundin' 'em with a club, but let folks buy +a pound of different things to eat and drink and carry it to 'em, +and we can try and raise a little money to get a warmer horse for +'em to stay in the coldest of the weather." + +"Oh!" says he, with a relieved look. "That's a different thing. +I am willin' to do that. I don't know about givin' 'em any money +towards gettin' 'em a home, but I'll carry 'em a pound of crackers +or a pound of flour, and help it along all I can." + +Josiah is a clever creeter (though close), and he never made no +more objections towards havin' it. + +Wall, the next day I put on my shawl and hood (a new brown hood +knit out of zephyr worsted, very nice, a present from our daughter +Maggie, our son Thomas Jefferson's wife), and sallied out to see +what the neighbor's thought about it. + +The first woman I called on wuz Miss Beazley, a new neighbor who +had just moved into the neighborhood. They are rich as they can +be, and I expected at least to get a pound of tea out of her. + +She said it wuz a worthy object, and she would love to help it +along, but they had so many expenses of their own to grapple with, +that she didn't see her way clear to promise to do anything. She +said the girls had got to have some new velvet suits, and some +sealskin sacques this winter, and they had got to new furnish the +parlors, and send their oldest boy to college, and the girls +wanted to have some diamond lockets, and ought to have 'em but she +didn't know whether they could manage to get them or not, if they +did, they had got to scrimp along every way they could. And then +they wuz goin' to have company from a distance, and had got to get +another girl to wait on 'em. And though she wished the poor well, +she felt that she could not dare to promise a cent to 'em. She +wished the Smedley family well -- dretful well -- and hoped I +would get lots of things for 'em. But she didn't really feel as +if it would be safe for her to promise'em a pound of anything, +though mebby she might, by a great effort, raise a pound of flour +for 'em, or meal. + +Says I dryly (dry as meal ever wuz in its dryest times), "I +wouldn't give too much. Though," says I, "A pound of flour would +go a good ways if it is used right." And I thought to myself that +she had better keep it to make a paste to smooth over things. + +Wall, I went from that to Miss Jacob Hess'es, and Miss Jacob Hess +wouldn't give anything because the old lady wuz disagreeable, old +Grandma Smedley, and I said to Miss Jacob Hess that if the Lord +didn't send His rain and dew onto anybody only the perfectly +agreeable, I guessed there would be pretty dry times. It wuz my +opinion there would be considerable of a drouth. + +There wuz a woman there a visitin' Miss Hess -- she wuz a stranger +to me and I didn't ask her for anything, but she spoke up of her +own accord and said she would give, and give liberal, only she wuz +hampered. She didn't say why, or who, or when, but she only sez +this that "she wuz hampered," and I don't know to this day what +her hamper wuz, or who hampered her. + +And then I went to Ebin Garven'ses, and Miss Ebin Garven wouldn't +help any because she said "Joe Smedley had been right down lazy, +and she couldn't call him anything else." + +"But," says I, "Joe is dead, and why should his children starve +because their pa wasn't over and above smart when he wuz alive?" +But she wouldn't give. + +Wall, Miss Whymper said she didn't approve of the manner of +giving. Her face wuz all drawed down into a curious sort of a +long expression that she called religus and I called somethin' +that begins with "h-y-p-o" -- and I don't mean hypoey, either. + +No, she couldn't give, she said, because she always made a +practise of not lettin' her right hand know what her left hand +give. + +And I said, for I wuz kinder took aback, and didn't think, I said +to her, a glancin' at her hands which wuz crossed in front of her, +that I didn't see how she managed it, unless she give when her +right hand was asleep. + +And she said she always gave secret. + +And I said, "So I have always s'posed -- very secret." + +I s'pose my tone was some sarcastic, for she says, "Don't the +Scripter command us to do so?" + +Says I firmly, "I don't believe the Scripter means to have us +stand round talkin' Bible, and let the Smedleys starve," says I. +"I s'pose it means not to boast of our good deeds." + +Says she, "I believe in takin' the Scripter literal, and if I +can't git my stuff there entirely unbeknown to my right hand I +sha'n't give." + +"Wall," says I, gettin' up and movin' towards the door, "you must +do as you're a mind to with fear and tremblin'." + +I said it pretty impressive, for I thought I would let her see I +could quote Scripter as well as she could, if I sot out. + +But good land! I knew it wuz a excuse. I knew she wouldn't give +nothin' not if her right hand had the num palsy, and you could +stick a pin into it -- no, she wouldn't give, not if her right +hand was cut off and throwed away. + +Wall, Miss Bombus, old Dr. Bombus'es widow, wouldn't give -- and +for all the world -- I went right there from Miss Whymper'ses. +Miss Bombus wouldn't give because I didn't put the names in the +Jonesville Augur or Gimlet, for she said, "Let your good deeds so +shine." + +"Why," says I, "Miss Whymper wouldn't give because she wanted to +give secreter, and you won't give because you want to give +publicker, and you both quote Scripter, but it don't seem to help +the Smedleys much." + +She said that probably Miss Whymper was wrestin' the Scripter to +her own destruction." + +"Wall," says I, "while you and Miss Whymper are a wrestin' the +Scripter, what will become of the Smedleys? It don't seem right +to let them 'freeze to death, and starve to death, while we are a +debatin' on the ways of Providence." + +But she didn't tell, and she wouldn't give. + +A woman wuz there a visitin', Miss Bombus'es aunt, I think, and +she spoke up and said that she fully approved of her niece +Bombus'es decision. And she said, "As for herself, she never +give to any subject that she hadn't thoroughly canvassed." + +Says I, "There they all are in that little hut, you can canvass +them at any time. Though," says I, thoughtfully, "Marvilla might +give you some trouble." And she asked why. + +And I told her she had the rickets so she couldn't stand still to +be canvassed, but she could probably follow her up and canvass +her, if she tried hard enough. And says I, "There is old Grandma +Smedley, over eighty, and five children under eight, you can +canvass them easy." + +Says she, "The Bible says, `Search the Sperits.'" + +And I was so wore out a seein' how place after place, for three +times a runnin the Bible was lifted up and held as a shield before +stingy creeters, to ward off the criticism of the world and their +own souls, that I says to myself -- loud enough so they could hear +me, mebbe, "Why is it that when anybody wants to do a mean, +ungenerous act, they will try to quote a verse of Scripter to +uphold 'em, jest as a wolf will pull a lock of pure white wool +over his wolfish foretop, and try to look innocent and sheepish." + +I don't care if they did hear me, I wuz on the step mostly when I +thought it, pretty loud. + +Wall, from Miss Bombus'es I went to Miss Petingill's. + +Miss Petingill is a awful high-headed creeter. She come to the +door herself and she said, I must excuse her for answerin' the +door herself. (I never heard the door say anything and don't +believe she did, it was jest one of her ways.) But she said I +must excuse her as her girl wuz busy at the time. + +She never mistrusted that I knew her hired girl had left, and she +wuz doin' her work herself. She had ketched off her apron I knew, +as she come through the hall, for I see it a layin' behind the +door, all covered with flour. And after she had took me into the +parlor, and we had set down, she discovered some spots of flour on +her dress, and she said she "had been pastin' some flowers into a +scrap book to pass away the time." But I knew she had been bakin' +for she looked tired, tired to death almost, and it wuz her bakin' +day. But she would sooner have had her head took right off than +to own up that she had been doin' housework -- why, they say that +once when she wuz doin' her work herself, and was ketched lookin' +awful, by a strange minister, that she passed herself off' for a +hired girl and said, "Miss Petingill wasn't to home, and when +pressed hard she said she hadn't "the least idee where Miss +Petingill wuz." + +Jest think on 't once -- and there she wuz herself. The idee! + +Wall, the minute I sot down before I begun my business or +anything, Miss Petingill took me to do about puttin' in Miss +Bibbins President of our Missionary Society for the Relief of +Indignent Heathens. + +The Bibbins'es are good, very good, but poor. + +Says Miss Petingill: "It seems to me as if there might be some +other woman put in, that would have had more influence on the +Church." + +Says I, "Haint Miss Bibbins a good Christian sister, and a great +worker?" + +"Why yes, she wuz good, good in her place. But," she said, "the +Petingills hadn't never associated with the Bibbins'es." + +And I asked her if she s'posed that would make any difference with +the heathen; if the heathen would be apt to think less of Miss +Bibbins because she hadn't associated with the Petingills? + +And she said, she didn't s'pose "the heathens would ever know it; +it might make some difference to 'em if they did," she thought, +"for it couldn't be denied," she said, "that Miss Bibbins did not +move in the first circles of Jonesville." + +It had been my doin's a puttin' Miss Bibbins in and I took it +right to home, she meant to have me, and I asked her if she +thought the Lord would condemn Miss Bibbins on the last day, +because she hadn't moved in the first circles of Jonesville? + +And Miss Petingill tosted her head a little, but had to own up, +that she thought "He wouldn't." + +"Wall, then," sez I, "do you s'pose the Lord has any objections +to her working for Him now?" + +"Why no, I don't know as the Lord would object." + +"Wall," sez I, "we call this work the Lord's work, and if He is +satisfied with Miss Bibbins, we ort to be." + +But she kinder nestled round, and I see she wuzn't satisfied, but +I couldn't stop to argue, and I tackled her then and there about +the Smedleys. I asked her to give a pound, or pounds, as she felt +disposed. + +But she answered me firmly that she could't give one cent to the +Smedleys, she wuz principled against it. + +And I asked her, "Why?" + +And she said, because the old lady wuz proud and wanted a home, +and she thought that pride wuz so wicked, that it ort to be put +down. + +Wall, Miss Huff, Miss Cephas Huff, wouldn't give anything because +one of the little Smedleys had lied to her. She wouldn't +encourage lyin'. + +And I told her I didn't believe she would be half so apt to reform +him on an empty stomach, as after he wuz fed up. But she wouldn't +yield. + +Wall, Miss Daggett said she would give, and give abundant, only +she didn't consider it a worthy object. + +But it wuzn't nothin' only a excuse, for the object has never been +found yet that she thought wuz a worthy one. Why, she wouldn't +give a cent towards painting the Methodist steeple, and if that +haint a high and worthy object, I don't know what is. Why, our +steeple is over seventy feet from the ground. But she wouldn't +help us a mite -- not a single cent. + +Take such folks as them and the object never suits 'em. They +won't come right out and tell the truth that they are too stingy +and mean to give away a cent, but they will always put the excuse +onto the object -- the object don't suit 'em. + +Why, I do believe it is the livin' truth that if the angel Gabriel +wuz the object, if he wuz in need and we wuz gittin' up a pound +party for him -- she would find fault with Gabriel, and wouldn't +give him a ounce of provisions. + +Yes, I believe it -- I believe they would tost their heads and +say, they always had had their thoughts about anybody that tooted +so loud -- it might be all right but it didn't look well, and +would be apt to make talk. Or they would say that he wuz +shiftless and extravagant a loafin' round in the clouds, when he +might go to work -- or that he might raise the money himself by +selling the feathers offen his wings for down pillers -- or some +of the rest of the Gabriel family might help him -- or something, +or other -- anyway they would propose some way of gittin' out of +givin' a cent to Gabriel. I believe it as much as I believe I +live and breathe; and so does Josiah. + +Wall, Miss Mooney wouldn't give anything because she thought Jane +Smedley wuzn't so sick as she thought she wuz; she said "she was +spleeny." + +And I told Miss Mooney that when a woman was sick enough to die, I +thought she ort to be called sick. + +But Miss Mooney wouldn't give up, and insisted to the very last +that Miss Smedley wuz hypoey and spleeny -- and thought she wuz +sicker than she really wuz. And she held her head and her nose up +in a very disagreeable and haughty way, and said as I left, that +she never could bear to help spleeny people. + +Wall, all that forenoon did I traipse through the street and not +one cent did I get for the Smedleys, only Miss Gowdey said she +would bring a cabbage and Miss Deacon Peedick and Miss Ingledue +partly promised a squash apiece. And I mistrusted that they give +'em more to please me than anything else. + +Wall, I wuz clean discouraged and beat out, and so I told Josiah. +But he encouraged me some by sayin': + +"Wall, I could have told you jest how it would be," and, "You +would have done better, Samantha, to have been to home a cookin' +for your own famishin' family." And several more jest such +inspirin' remarks as men will give to the females of their +families when they are engaged in charitable enterprises. + +But I got a good, a very good dinner, and it made me feel some +better, and then I haint one to give up to discouragements, +anyway. + +So I put on a little better dress for after noon, and my best +bonnet and shawl, and set sail again after dinner. + +And if I ever had a lesson in not givin' up to discouragements in +the first place I had it then. For whether it wuz on account of +the more dressy look of my bonnet and shawl -- or whether it wuz +that folks felt cleverer in the afternoon -- or whether it wuz +that I had gone to the more discouragin' places in the forenoon, +and the better ones in the afternoon -- or whether it wuz that I +tackled on the subject in a better way than I had tackled 'em -- +whether it wuz for any of these reasons, or all of 'em or somethin' + -- anyway my luck turned at noon, 12 M., and all that afternoon +I had one triumph after another -- place after place did I collect +pound or pounds as the case may be (or collected the promises of +'em, I mean). I did splendid, and wuz prospered perfectly amazing + -- and I went home feelin' as happy and proud as a king or a zar. + +And the next Tuesday evenin' we had the pound party. They +concluded to have it to our house. And Thomas Jefferson and +Maggie, and Tirzah Ann and Whitefield came home early in the +afternoon to help trim the parlor and setin' room with evergreens +and everlastin' posies, and fern leaves. + +They made the room look perfectly beautiful. And they each of +'em, the two childern and their companions, brought home a motto +framed in nice plush and gilt frames, which they put up on each +side of the settin' room, and left them there as a present to +their pa and me. They think a sight of us, the childern do -- +and visey versey, and the same. + +One of 'em wuz worked in gold letters on a red back-ground "Bear +Ye One Another's Burdens." And the other wuz "Feed my Lambs." + +They think a sight on us, the childern do -- they knew them +mottoes would highly tickle their pa and me. And they did seem to +kinder invigorate up all the folks that come to the party. + +And they wuz seemingly legions. Why, they come, and they kept a +comin'. And it did seem as if every one of 'em had tried to see +who could bring the most. Why, they brought enough to keep the +Smedleys comfortable all winter long. It wuz a sight to see 'em. + +It wuz a curious sight, too, to set and watch what some of the +folks said and done as they brought their pounds in. + +I had to be to the table all the time a'most, for I wuz appointed +a committee, or a board -- I s'pose it would be more proper to +call myself a board, more business like. Wall, I wuz the board +appointed to lay the things on -- to see that they wuz all took +care of, and put where they couldn't get eat up, or any other +casuality happen to 'em. + +And I declare if some of the queerest lookin' creeters didn't come +up to the table and talk to me. There wuz lots of 'em there that +I didn't know, folks that come from Zoar, Jim Smedley's old +neighborhood. + +There wuz a long table stretched acrost one end of the settin' +room, and I stood behind it some as if I wuz a dry goods merchant +or grocery, and some like a preacher. + +And the women would come up to me and talk. There wuz one woman +who got real talkative to me before the evenin' wuz out. She said +her home wuz over two miles beyond Zoar. + +She had a young babe with her, a dark complexioned babe, with a +little round black head, that looked some like a cannon ball. She +said she had shingled the child that day about eight o'clock in +the forenoon; she talked real confidential to me. + +She said the babe had sights of hair, and she told her husband +that day that if he would shingle the babe she would come to the +party and if he wouldn't shingle it she wouldn't come. It seemed +they had had a altercation on the subject; she wanted it shingled +and he didn't. But it seemed that ruther than stay away from the +party -- he consented, and shingled it. So they come. + +They brought a eight pound loaf of maple sugar and two dozen eggs. +They did well. Then there wuz another woman who would walk her +little girl into the bedroom every few minutes, and wet her hair, +and comb it over, and curl it on her fingers. The child had a +little blue flannel dress on, with a long plain waist, and a long +skirt gethered on full all round. Her hair lay jest as smooth and +slick as glass all the time, but five times did she walk her off, +and go through with that performance. She brought ten yards of +factory cloth, and a good woollen petticoat for the old grandma. +She did first-rate. + +And then there wuz another woman who stayed by the table most all +the evenin'. She would gently but firmly ask everybody who +brought anything, what the price of the article wuz -- and then +she would tackle the different women who come up to the table for +patterns. I do believe she got the pattern of every bask waist +there wuz there, and every mantilly. + +And Abram Gee brought twenty-five loaves of bread -- of different +sizes, but all on 'em good. And he looked at Ardelia Tutt every +minute of the time. And Ardelia brought a lot of verses, -- +"Stanzas on a Grandmother." I didn't think they would do Grandma +Smedley much good, and then on the other hand I didn't s'pose they +would hurt her any. + +But we had a splendid good time after the things wuz all brought +in -- of course, bein' a board the fore part of the evenin' I +naturally had a harder time than I did the latter part, after I +had got over it. + +The children, Thomas J., and Tirzah Ann, and Ardelia Tutt, and +Abram Gee, and some of the rest of the young folks sung and played +some beautiful pieces, and they had four tablows, which wuz +perfectly beautiful. + +And then we passed good nice light biscuit and butter, and hot +coffee, and pop corn and apples. And it did seem, and all the +neighbors said so, that it wuz the very best party they had ever +attended to. + +And before they went away they made a motion some of the +responsable men did -- some made the motions and some seconded 'em +-- that they would adjourn till jest one year from that night, +when if the Smedleys was still alive and in need -- we would have +jest such a party ag'in. + +And at the last on't Elder Minkley made a prayer -- a very +thankful and good prayer, but short. And then they went home. + +Wall, the next mornin' we started to carry the things to the +Smedleys. It wuz very early, for Josiah had got to go clear to +Loontown on business, and I wuz goin' to stay with the childern +till he got back. + +It wuz a very cold mornin'. We hadn't heard from the Smedleys for +two or three days, because we wanted to surprise 'em, so we didn't +want to give 'em a hint beforehand of what we wuz a doin'. So, as +I say, it wuz a number of days sense we had heard from 'em, and +the weather wuz cold. + +When we got to the door it seemed to be dretful still there +inside. And there wuz some white frost on the latch jest as if a +icy, white hand had onlatched the door, and had laid on it last. + +We rapped, but nobody answered. And then we opened the door and +went in, and there they all lay asleep. The children waked up. +But old Grandma didn't. + +There wuzn't any fire in the room, and you could see by the +freezing coldness of the air that there hadn't been any for a day +or two. + +Grandma Smedley had took the poor old coverin's all off from +herself, and put 'em round the youngest baby, little Jim. And he +lay there all huddled up tight to his Grandma, with his red cheek +close to her white one, for he loved her. + +Josiah cried and wept, and wept and cried onto his bandana -- but +I didn't. + +The tears run down my face some, to see the childern feel so bad +when Grandma couldn't speak to 'em. + +But I knew that the childern would be took care of now, I knew the +Jonesvillians would be all rousted up and sorry enough for 'em, +and would be willin' to do anything now, when it wuz some too +late. + +And I felt that I couldn't cry nor weep (and told Josiah so), the +tears jest dripped down my face in a stream, but I wouldn't weep +-- for as I said to myself: + +While the Jonesvillians had been a disputin' back and forth, and +wrestin' Scripter, and the meanin' of Providence in regard to +helpin' Grandma Smedley and gittin' her a comfortable place to +stay in, and somethin' to eat, the Lord himself had took the case +in hand and had gin her a home and the bread that satisfies." + + + +IV. + +ARDELIA AND ABRAM GEE. + + +Wall, I don't s'pose there had been a teacher in our deestrict +for years and years that gin' better satisfaction than Ardelia +Tutt. Good soft little creeter, the scholars any one of 'em felt +above hurtin' on her or plagin' her any way. She sort a made 'em +feel they had to take care on her, she wuz so sort a helpless +actin', and good natured, and yet her learnin' wuz good, +fust-rate. + +Yes, Ardelia was thought a sight on in Jonesville by scholars and +parents and some that wuzn't parents. One young chap in +perticiler, Abram Gee by name, who had just started a baker's +shop in Jonesville, he fell so deep in love with her from the +very start that I pitied him from about the bottom of my heart. +It wuz at our house that he fell. + +The young folks of our meetin'-house had a sort of a evenin' +meetin' there to see about raisin' some money for the help of the +steeple -- repairin' of it. Abram is a member, and so is +Ardelia, and I see the hull thing. I see him totter and I see +him fall. And prostrate he wuz, from that first night. Never +was there a feller that fell in love deeper, or lay more +helpless. And Ardelia liked him, that wuz plain to see; at fust +as I watched and see him totter, I thought she wuz a sort o' +wobblin' too, and when he fell deep, deep in love, I looked to +see her a follerin' on. But Ardelia, as soft as she wuz, had an +element of strength. She wuz ambitious. She liked Abram, but +she had read novels a good deal, and she had for years been +lookin' for a prince to come a ridin' up to their dooryard in +disguise with a crown on under his hat, and woo her to be his +bride. + +And so she braced herself against the sweet influence of love and +it wuz tuff -- I could see for myself that it wuz, when she had +laid out to set on a throne by the side of a prince, he a holdin' +his father's scepter in his hand -- to descend from that elevation +and wed a husband who wuz a moulder of bread, with a rollin' pin +in his hand. It wuz tuff for Ardelia; I could see right through +her mind (it wuzn't a great distance to see), and I could see jest +how a conflict wuz a goin' on between love and ambition. + +But Abram had my best wishes, for he wuz a boy I had always +liked. The Gees had lived neighbor to us for years. He wuz a +good creeter and his bread wuz delicious (milk emptin's). He wuz +a sort of a hard, sound lookin' chap, and she, bein' so oncommon +soft, the contrast kinder sot each other off and made 'em look +well together. + +He had a house and lot all paid for, with no incumbrances only a +mortgage of 150 dollars and a lame mother. But he laid out to +clear off the mortgage this year, and I wuz told that mother Gee +wuz a goin' to live with her daughter Susan, who had jest come +into a big property -- as much as 700 dollars worth of land, +besides cows, 2 heads of cow, and one head of a calf. + +I knew Mother Gee and she wuz goin' to stay with Abram till he +got married and then she wuz goin' to live with Susan. And I +s'pose it is so. She is a likely old woman with a milk leg. + +Wall, Abram paid Ardelia lots of attention, sech as walkin' home +with her from protracted meetin's nights, and lookin' at her +durin' the meetin's more protracted than the meetin's wuz fur. +And 3 times he sent her a plate of riz biscuit sweetened, +sweetened too sweet almost, he went too fur in this and I see it. + +Yes, he done his part as well as his condition would let him, +paralyzed by his feelin's -- but she acted kinder offish, and I +see that sonthin' wuz in the way. I mistrusted at first, it +might be Abram's incumbrance, but durin' a conversation I had +with her, I see I wuz in the wrong on't. And I could see plain, +though some couldn't, that she liked Abram as she did her eyes. +Somebody run him down a little one day before me and she sprouted +right up and took his part voyalent. I could see her feelin's +towards him though she wouldn't own up to 'em. But one day she +came out plain to me and lamented his condition in life. +Somebody had attact her that day before me about marryin' of him +-- and she owned up to me, that she had laid out to marry +somebody to elevate her. Some one with a grand pure mission in +life. + +And I spoke right up and sez, "Why bread is jest as pure and +innocent as anything can be, you won't find anything wicked about +good yeast bread, nor," sez I, cordially, "in milk risin', if it +is made proper." + +But she said she preferred a occupation that wuz risin', and +noble, and that made a man necessary and helpful to the masses. + +And I sez agin -- "Good land! the masses have got to eat. And I +guess you starve the masses a spell and they'll think that good +bread is as necessary and helpful to 'em as anything can be. And +as fer its bein' a risin' occupation, why," sez I, "it is stiddy +risen' -- risin' in the mornin,' and risin' at night, and all +night, both hop and milk emptin's. Why," sez I, "I never see a +occupation so risin' as his'n is, both milk and hop." But she +wouldn't seem to give in and encourage him much only by spells. + +And then Abram didn't take the right way with her. I see he wuz +a goin' just the wrong way to win a woman's love. For his love, +his great honest love for her made him abject, he groveled at her +feet, loved to grovel. + +I told him, for he confided in me from the first on't and +bewailed her coldness to me, I told him to sprout up and act as +if he had some will of his own and some independent life of his +own. Sez I, "Any woman that sees a man a layin' around under her +feet will be tempted to step on him," sez I. "I don't see how +she can help it, if she calcerlates to get round any, and walk." +Sez I, "Sprout up and be somebody. She is a good little creeter, +but no better than you are, Abram; be a man." + +And he would try to be. I could see him try. But one of her +soft little glances, specially if it wuz kind and tender to him, +es it wuz a good deal of the time, why it would just overthrow +him ag'in. He would collapse and become nothin' ag'in, before +her. Why I have hearn him sing that old him, a lookin' right at +Ardelia stiddy: + +"Oh to be nothin', nothin'!" + +And thinks I to myself, "if this keeps on, you are in a fairway +to git your wish." + +He wuz a good singer, a beartone, and she a secent. They loved +to sing together. They needed some air, but then they got along +without it; and it sounded quite well, though rather low and +deep. + +Wall, it run along for weeks and weeks, he with his hopes a +risin' up sometimes like his yeast and then bein' pounded down +ag'in like his bread, under the hard knuckles of a woman's +capricious cruelty. For I must say that she did, for sech a soft +littte creeter, have cold and cruel ways to Abram. (But I s'pose +it wuz when she got to thinkin' about the Prince, or some other +genteel lover.) + +But her real feelin's would break out once in a while, and lift +him up to the 3d heaven of happiness and then he'd have to totter +and fall down ag'in. Abram Gee had a hard time on't. I pitied +him from nearly the bottom of my heart. But I still kep' a +thinkin' it would turn out well in the end. For it wuz jest +about this time that I happened to find this poetry in a book +where she had, I s'posed, left it. And I read 'em, almost +entirely unbeknown to myself. + +It wuz wrote in a dreatful blind way but I recognized it at once. +I looked right through it, and see what she wuz a writin' about +though many wouldn't, it wuz wrote in sech a deep style. + + "STANZAS ON BREAD; + + "or + + "A LAY OF A BROKEN HEART. + + "Oh Bread, dear Bread, that seemest to us so cold, + Oft'times concealed thee within, may be a sting! + Sweet buried hopes may in thy crust be rolled; + A sad, burnt crust of deepest suffering. + + "There are some griefs the female soul don't tell, + And she may weep, and she may wretched be; + Though she may like the name of Abram well + And she may not like dislike the name of G , + + "Oh Fel Ambition, how thou lurest us on, + How by thy high, bold torch we're stridin' led: + Thou lurest us up, cold mountain top upon, + And seated by us there, thou scoffest at bread. + + "Thou lookest down, Ambition, on the ovens brim; + Thou brookest not a word of him save with contumalee: + And yet, wert thou afar, how sweet to set by him + And cut low slices of sweet joy with G , + + "Oh! Fel Ambition, wert but thou away, + Could we thy hauntin' form no more, nor see; + How sweet 'twould be to linger on with A-, + How sweet 'twould be to dwell for aye with G-." + +Wall, as I say, she gin good satisfaction in the deestrict and I +declare for it, I got to likin' her dretful well before the +winter wuz over. Softer she wuz, and had to be, than any fuz +that was ever on any cotton flannel fur or near. And more verses +she wrote than wuz good for her, or for anybody else, - Why she +would write "Lines on the Tongs," or "Stanzas on the Salt +Suller," if she couldn't do any better; it beats all! And then +she would read 'em to me to get my idees on 'em. Why I had to +call on every martyr in the hull string of martyrs sometimes to +keep myself from tellin' her my full mind about 'em unbeknown to +me. For, if I had, it would have skairt the soft little creeter +out of what little wit she had. + +So I kep' middlin' still, and see it go on. For she wuz a good +little soul, affectionate and kinder helpful. A good creeter now +to find your speks. Why she found 'em for me times out of +number, and I got real attached to her and visey versey. And +when she came a visitin' me in the spring (at my request), and I +happened to mention that Josiah and me laid out to go to Saratoga +for the summer, what did the soft little creeter want to do but +to go too. Her father was well off and wuz able to send her, and +she had relatives there on her own side, some of the Pixleys, so +her board wouldn't cost nothin'. So it didn't look nothin' +unreasonable, though whether I could get her there and back +without her mashin' all down on my hands, like a over ripe peach, +she wuz that soft, wuz a question that hanted me, and so I told +Josiah. + +But Josiah kinder likes young girls (nothin' light; a calm +meetin'-house affection), it is kinder nater that he should, and +he sez: "Better let her go, she won't make much trouble." + +"No," sez I, "not to you, but if you had to set for hours and +hours and hear her verses read to you on every subject -- on +heaven, and earth, and the seas, and see her a measurin' of it +with a stick to get the lines the right length; if you had to go +through all this, mebby you would meditate on the subject before +you took it for a summer's job." + +" Wall," sez he, "mebby she won't write so much when she gets +started; she will be kinder jogged round and stirred up in body +and mebby her feelins' will kinder rest. I shouldn't wonder a +mite if they did," sez he. "And then she can take a good many +steps for you, and I love to see you favored," sez he. + +He wanted her to go, I see that, and I see that it wuz natur that +he should, and so I consented in my mind -- after a parlay. + +She found his specks a sight and his hat. Nothin' seemed to +please her better than to be gropin' round after things to please +somebody; her disposition wuz such. So it wuz settled that she +should accompany and go with us. And the mornin' we started she +met us at the Jonesville Depot in good sperits and a barege +delaine dress, cream color, and a hat of the same. + +I hadn't seen her for some weeks, and she seemed softly tickled +to see Josiah and me, and asked a good many questions about +Jonesville, kinder turnin' the conversation gradually round onto +bread, as I could see. So I branched right out, knowin' what she +wanted of me, and told her plain, that "Abram Gee wuz a lookin' +kinder mauger. But doin' his duty stiddy," sez I, lookin' keenly +at her, "a doin' his duty by everybody, and beloved by everybody, +him and his bread too." + +She turned her head away and kinder sithed, and I guess it wuz as +much as a quarter of a hour after that, that I see her take out a +pencil and a piece of paper out of her portmonny, and a little +stick, and she went to makin' some verses, a measurin' 'em +careful as she wrote 'em, and when she handed 'em to me they wuz +named + + + + "A LAY ON A CAR; + + "or + + "THE LESSON OF A LOCOMOTIVE." + +After I had read it and handed it back to her, she sez, "Don't +you think I improve on the melody and rhythm of my poetry? I +take this little stick with me now wherever I go, and measure my +lines by it. They are jest of a length, I am very particular; +you know you advised me to be." + +"Yes," sez I mechaniklly, "but I didn't mean jest that." Sez I, +"the poetry I wuz a thinkin' on, is measured by the soul, the +enraptured throb of heart and brain; it don't need takin' a stick +to it. Howsumever," sez I, for I see she looked sort a +disapinted, "howsumever, if you have measured 'em, they are +probable about the same length: it is a good sound stick, I +haint no doubt;" and I kinder sithed. + +And she sez, "What do you think of the first verse? Haint that +verse as true as fate, or sadness, or anything else you know of?" + +"Oh yes," sez I candidly, "yes; if the cars run backwards we +shouldn't go on; that is true as anything can be. But if I wuz +in your place, Ardelia," sez I, "I wouldn't write any more +to-day. It is a kind of muggy damp day. It is a awfully bad day +for poetry to-day. And," sez I, to get her mind offen it, "Have +you seen anything of my companion's specks?" + +And that took her mind offen poetry and she went a huntin' for +'em, on the seat and under the seat. She hunted truly high and +low and at last she found 'em on my pardner's foretop, the last +place any of us thought of lookin'. And she never said another +word about poetry, or any other trouble, nor I nuther. + + + + +V. + +WE ARRIVE AT SARATOGA. + + +We arrived at Saratoga jest as sunset with a middlin' gorgeous +dress on wuz a walkin' down the west and a biddin' us and the +earth good-bye. There wuz every color you could think on almost, +in her gown and some stars a shinin' through the floatin' drapery +and a half moon restin' up on her cloudy foretop like a beautiful +orniment. + +(I s'pose mebby it is proper to describe sunset in this way on +goin' to such a dressy place, though it haint my style to do so, I +don't love to describe sunset as a female and don't, much of the +time, but I love to see things correspond.) + +Wall, we descended from the cars and went to the boardin' place +provided for us beforehand by the look out of friends. It wuz a +good place, there haint no doubt of that, good folks; good fare +and clean. + +Ardelia parted away from us at the depo. She wuz a goin' to board +to a smaller boardin' house kep' by a second cousin of her +father's brother's wife's aunt. It wuz her father's request that +she should get her board there on account of its bein' in the +family. He loved "to see relations hang together;" so he said, +and "get their boards of each other." But I thought then, and I +think now, that it wuz because they asked less for the board. +Deacon Tutt is close. But howsumever Ardelia went there, and my +companion and me arrove at the abode where we wuz to abide, with +no eppisode only the triflin' one of the driver bein' dretful +mistook as to the price he asked to take us there. + +I thought, and Josiah thought, that 50 cents wuz the outlay of +expendatur he required to carry us where we would be; it wuz but a +short distance. But no! He said that 5 dollars wuz what he said, +that is, if we heard anything about a 5. But he thought we wuz +deef, and dident hear him. He thought he spoke plain, and said 4 +dollars for the trip. + +And on that price he sot down immovible. They arged, and Josiah +Allen even went so far as to use language that grated on my nerve, +it wuz so voyalent and vergin' on the profane. But there the man +sot, right onto that price, and he had to me the appeerance of one +who wuz goin' to sot there on it all night. And so rather than to +spend the night out doors, in conversation with him, he a settin' +on that price, and Josiah a shakin' his fist at it, and a jawin' +at it, I told Josiah that he had better pay it. And finally he +did, with groanin's that could hardly be uttered. + +Wall, after supper (a good supper and enough on't), Josiah proposed +that we should take a short walk, we two alone, for Ardelia wuz +afar from us, most to the other end of the village, either asleep +or a writin' poetry, I didn't know which, but I knew it wuz one or +the other of 'em. And I wuz tired enough myself to lay my head +down and repose in the arms of sleep, and told my companion so, +but he said: + +"Oh shaw! Let old Morpheus wait for us till we get back, there'll +be time enough to rest then." + +Josiah felt so neat, that he wuz fairly beginnin' to talk high +learnt, and classical. But I didn't say nothin' to break it up, +and tied on my bonnet with calmness (and a double bow knot) and we +sallied out. + +Soon, or mebby a little after, for we didn't walk fast on account +of my deep tucker, we stood in front of what seemed to be one hull +side of a long street, all full of orniments and open work, and +pillows, and flowers, and carvin's, and scallops, and down between +every scollop hung a big basket full of posys, of every beautiful +color under the heavens. And over all, and way back as fur as we +could see, wuz innumerable lights of every color, gorgeousness a +shinin' down on gorgeousness, glory above, a shinin' down on glory +below. And sweet strains of music wuz a floatin, out from +somewhere, a shinin' somewhere, renderin' the seen fur more +beautiful to all 4 of our wraptured ears. + +And Josiah sez, as we stood there nearly rooted to the place by +our motions, and a picket fence, sez he dreamily, + +"I almost feel as if we had made a mistake, and that this is the +land of Beuler." And he murmured to himself some words of the old +him: + +"Oh Beuler land! Sweet Beuler land!" + +And I whispered back to him and sez - "Hush they don't have brass +bands in Beulah land." + +And he sez, "How do you know what they have in Beuler?" + +"Wall," sez I, "'taint likely they do." + +But I don't know as I felt like blamin' him, for it did seem to me +to be the most beautiful place that I ever sot my eyes on. And it +did seem fairly as if them long glitterin' chains and links of +colored lights, a stretchin' fur back into the distance sort a +begoned for us to enter into a land of perfect beauty and Pure +Delight. + +And then them glitterin' chains of light would jine onto other +golden, and crimson, and orange, and pink, and blue, and amber +links of glory and hang there all drippin' with radiance, and way +back as fur as we could see. And away down under the shinin' +lanes the white statues stood, beautiful snow-white females, a +lookin' as if they enjoyed it all. And the lake mirrowed back all +of the beauty. + +Right out onto the lake stood a fairy-like structure all glowin' +with big drops of light and every glitterin' drop reflected down +in the water and the fountain a sprayin' up on each side. Why it +sprayed up floods of diamonds, and rubys, and sapphires, and +topazzes, and turkeys, and pearls, and opals, and sparklin' 'em +right back into the water agin. + +And right while we stood there, neerly rooted to the spot and +gazin' through extacy and 2 pickets, the band gin a loud burst of +melody and then stopped, and after a minute of silence, we hearn a +voice angel-sweet a risin' up, up, like a lark, a tender-hearted, +golden-throated lark. + +High, high above all the throngs of human folks who wuz cheerin' +her down below - up above the sea of glitterin' light - up above +the bendin' trees that clasped their hands together in silent +applaudin' above her, up, up, into the clear heavens, rose that +glorious voice a singin' some song about love, love that wuz +deathless, eternal. + +Why it seemed as if the very clouds wuz full of shadowy faces a +bendin' down to hear it, and the new moon, shaped just like a +boat, had glided down, down the sky to listen. + +If the man of the moon was there he wuz a layin' in the bottom of +the boat, he wuzn't in sight. But if he heard that music I'll bet +he would say he wuzn't in the practice of hearin' any better. And +Josiah stood stun still till she had got done, and then he sort a +sithed out: + +"Oh, it seems as if it must be Beuler land! Do you s'pose, +Samantha, Beuler land is any more beautiful?" + +And I sez, "I haint a thinkin' about Beulah." I sez it pretty +middlin' tart, partly to hide my own feelin's, which wuz perfectly +rousted up, and partly from principle, and sez I, "Don't for +mercy's sake call it Beuler." + +Josiah always will call it so. I've got a 4th cousin, Beulah Smith +(my own age and unmarried up to date), and he always did and would +call her Beuler. Truly in some things a pardner's influence and +encouragement fails to accomplish the ends aimed at. + +Wall, it wuz after some words that I drew Josiah away from that +seen of enchantment - or he me, I don't exactly know which way it +wuz - and we wended onwards in our walk. + +The hull broad streets wuz full of folks, full as they could be, +all on 'em perfect strangers to us and who knew what motives or +weapons they wuz a carryin' with 'em; but we knew we wuz safe, +Josiah and me did, for way up over all our heads, stood a big +straight soldier, a volunteer volunteerin, to see to the hull crew +on 'em below, a seein' that they behaved themselves. His age wuz +seventy-seven as near as I could make out but he didn't look +more'n half that. He had kep' his age remarkable. + +Wall, it wuz, if I remember right, jest about now that we see a +glitterin' high up over our heads some writen in flame. I never +see such brilliant writin, before nor don't know as I ever shall +ag'in. + +And Josiah stopped stun still, and stood a lookin' perfectly +dumfoundered at it. And finally he sez, "I'd give a dollar bill +if I could write like that." + +I see he wuz deeply rousted up for 2 cents is as high as he +usually goes in betted. I see he felt deep and I didn't blame +him. Why," sez he, "jest imagine, Samantha, a hull letter wrote +like that! how I'd love to send one back to Uncle Nate Gowdey. + +"How Uncle Nate's eyes would open, and he wouldn't want no +spectacles nor nothin' to read it with, would he? I wonder if I +could do it," sez he, a beginnin' to be all rousted up. + +But I sez, "Be calm," for so deep is my mind that I grasped the +difficuties of the undertaken' at once. "How could yon send it, +Josiah Allen? Where would you get a envelop? How could you get +it into the mail bag?" Sez I, "When anybody would send a letter +wrote like that, they would want to write it on sheets of +lightnin', and fold it up in the envelopin' clouds of the skies, +and it should be received by a kneelin' and reverent soul. Who is +Uncle Nate that he should get it? He has not a reverent Soul and +he has also rheumatiz in his legs." + +And then I thought, so quick and active is my mind when it gets to +startin' off on a tower, I thought of what I had hearn a few days +before, of how the secret had been learnt by somebody who lived +right there in the village, of floatin' letters up at sea from one +ship to another, sigualin' out in letters of flame - + +"Help! I'm a sinkin'!" or "Danger ahead! Look out!" + +And I thought what it must be to stand on a dusky night on a lone +deck and see up on the broad, dark; lonesome sky above, a sudden +message, a flash of vivid lightnin', takin' to itself the form of +language. And I wondered to myself if in the future we should use +the great pages of the night-sky to write messages from one city +to another, or from sea to land, of danger and warnin'; and then I +thought to myself, if souls clog-bound to earth are able to +accomplish so much, who knows but the freed soul goin' outward and +onward from height to height of wisdom may yet be able to signal +down from the Safe Land messages of help and warnin' to the souls +it loved below. + +The souls a sailin' and a driftin' through the dark night of +despair - a dashin' along through fog and mist and darkness aginst +rocks. What it would be to one kneelin' in the lonesome night +watches by a grave, if the dark sky could grow luminous and he +could read, - "Do not despair! I am alive! I love you!" + +Or, in the hour of the blackest temptation and dread, when the +earth is hollow and the sky a black vault, and the only way of +happiness on God's earth seems down the dangerous, beautiful way, +God-forbidden, what would it be to have the empty vault lit up +with "Danger ahead! We will help you! be patient a little +longer!" + +Oh how fur my thoughts wuz a travellin', and at what a good jog, +but not one trace did my companion see on my forward of these +thoughts that wuz a passin' through my foretop: and at that very +minute, we came up nigh enough to see that right back of the +glitterin' language overhead, went a long line of big, glowin' +stars of glory way up over our heads, and leadin' down a gentle +declivity and Josiah sez, "Let's foller on, and see what it will +lead us to, Samantha." + +"Wall," sez I, "light is pretty generally, safe to foller, Josiah +Allen." And so we meandered along, keepin' our 2 heads as nigh as +we could under that long glitterin' chain of golden drops that wuz +high overhead. And on, and on, we follered it dilligently; till +for the land's sake! if it didn't lead us to another one of them +openwork buildin's, fixed off beautiful, and we could see inside 2 +big wells like, with acres of floor seemin'ly on each side of 'em, +and crowds of folks a walkin' about and settin' at little tables +and most all of 'em a drinkin'. + +The water they drinked we could see wuz a bubblin' up and a +runnin' over all the time, in big round crystal globes. And up, +up on a slender pole way up over one of the wells hung another one +of them crystal bowls, a bubblin' over with the water and +sparklin'. + +And ag'in Josiah asked me if I thought Beuler land could compare +with it? + +And I told him ag'in kinder sharp, That I wuzn't a thinkin' about +Beuler, I didn't know any sech a place or name. I wish he would +call things right. + +Wall, he wuz so dead tired by this time, that we sot sail homewards; +that is, my feet wuz tired, and my bones, but my mind seemed more +rousted up than common. + + + + +VI. + +SARATOGA BY DAYLIGHT. + + +Wall, the next mornin' Josiah and me sallied out middlin' early to +explore still further the beauties and grandness of Saratoga. I +had on a black straw bonnet, a green vail, and a umbrell. I also +have my black alpacky, that good moral dress. + +My dress bein' such a high mission one choked me. It wuz so high +in the neck it held my chin up in a most uncomfortable position, +but sort a grand and lofty lookin'. My sleeves wuz so long that +more'n half the time my hand wuz covered up by 'em and I wuz too +honerable to wear 'em for mits; no, in the name of principle I +wore 'em for sleeves, good long sleeves, a pattern to other +grandmas that I might meet. + +I felt that when they see me and see what I wuz a doin' and +endurin' fur the cause of female dressin' they would pause in +their wild career, and cover up their necks and pull their sleeves +down. + +Wall, it haint to be expected that I could walk along carryin' +such hefty emotions as I wuz a carryin', and havin' my neck held +high and stiddy both by principle and alpacky, and see to every +step I wuz a takin'. And, first I knew, right while I was +enjoyin' the loftiest of these emotions, I ketched my foot in +sunthin', and most fell down. Instinctively (such is the power of +love) I put out my hand and clutched at the arm of my pardner. +But he too wuz nearly fallin' at the same time. It wuz a narrow +chance that we wuz a runnin' from having our prostrate forms a +layin' there outstretched on the highway. + +Instinctively I sez, "Good land!" and Josiah sez -- wall, it is +fur from me to tell what he said, but it ended up with these +words, "Dumb them dumb sidewalks anyway;" and sez he, "I should +think it would pay to have a little less gilt paint and spangles +and orniments overhead and a few more solid bricks unless they +want more funerals here, dumb 'em!" + +Sez I,"Be calm! who be you a talkin' about? who do you want to +bring down your fearful curses on, Josiah Allen?" + +"Why, onto the dumb bricks," sez he. + +He wuz agitated and I said no more. But four times in that first +walk, did I descend almost precipitously into declivities amongst +the bricks, risin' simultaneously on similar elevations. + +It wuz a fearful ordeel and I felt it so, but upheld by principle +and Josiah, I moved onwards, through what seemed to be 5 great +throngs and masses of people, 3 on the ground and 2 hinted up +above us on tall pillows. + +Them immense places overhead long as the streets, wuz kinder +scalloped out and trimmed off handsum with railin's, etc. And on +it -- oh! what a vast congregation of heads of all sorts and sizes +and colors. And oh! what a immense display of parasols; why no +parasol store in the land could begin with what I see there. + +I can truly say that I thought I knew somethin' about parasols;, +havin' owned 3 different ones in the course of my life, and havin' +one covered over. I thought I knew somethin' of their nater and +habits, which is a good deal, so I had always s'posed, like a +umbrell's. But good land! I gin up that I knew them not, nor +never had. + +Why anybody could learn more on 'em through one jerney down that +street, than from a hull lifetime in Jonesville. Truly travel is +very upliftin' and openin' and spreadin' out to the mind, both in +parasols and human nater. + +Wall, them 2 masses over our heads wuz 2, then the one in which we +wuz a strugglin' and the one opposite to it made 4. For anybody +with any pretence to learnin' knows that twice 2 is 4. And then +in the middle of the broad street was a bigger mass of chariots +and horsemen, and carts and carriages, and great buggies and +little ones, and big loads of barrels, and big loads of ladies, +and then a load of wood, and then a load of hay, and then a pair +of young folks pretty as a picture. And then came some high big +coaches as big as our spare bedroom, and as high as the roof on +our horse barn, with six horses hitched to e'm, all runnin' over +on top with men; and wimmen, and children, and parasols, and +giggles, and ha ha's. And a man wuz up behind a soundin' out on a +trumpet, a dretful sort of a high, sweet note, not dwindlin' down +to the end as some music duz, but kinder crinklin' round and +endin' up in the air every time. + +Josiah wuz dretful took with it and he told me in confidence that +he laid out when he got home to buy a trumpet and blow out jest +them strains every time he went into Jonesville or out of it. He +said it would sound so sort a warlike and impressive. + +I expostulated aginst the idee. But sez he, "You'll enjoy it when +you get used to it." + +"Never!" sez I. + +"Yes you will," sez he, "and while I live I lay out that you shall +have advantages, and shall enjoy things new and uneek." + +"Yes," sez I feelin'ly, "I expect to, Josiah Allen, as long as I +live with you." And I sithed. But I had little time to enjoy +even sithin', for oh! the crowd that wuz a pressin' onto us and +surroundin' us on every side, some on 'em curius and strange +lookin', some on 'em beautiful and grand. Pretty young girls +lookin' sweet enough to kiss, and right behind 'em a Chinese man +with a long dress, and wooden shoes, and his hair in a long braid +behind, and his eyes sot in sideways. And then would come on a +hull lot of wimmen in dresses ev'ry color of the rainbow, and some +men. Then a few childern, lookin' sweet as roses, with their +mothers a pushin' the little carts ahead on 'em. And if you'll +believe it, I don't s'pose you will, but it is true, that lots of +black ma's had childern jest as white as snow, and pretty as +rosebuds, took after their fathers I s'pose. But I don't believe +in a mixin' of the races. And when I see 'em a kissin' the pretty +babys, I begun to muse a very little on the feelin's of the +indignent South, at havin' a colered girl set in the same car with +'em, or on a bench in the same school room. + +I mewsed on how they held the white forms clost to their black +breasts at birth, and in the hour of death -- the black lips +pressed to the white cheeks and lips, in both cases. And all the +way between life and death they mingle clost as they can, some in +some cases like the hill of knowledge. Then the contact is too +clost, when they sot out to climb up by 'em. Truly there are deep +conundrums and strange ones, all along through life; though the +white man may be, and is, cleer up out of his way, on the sunshiny +brow of the hill, and the black man at the foot, way down amongst +the shadows and darkness of the low grounds. They don't come very +nigh each other. But the arms that have felt the clasp and the +lips that have felt the kisses of that very same black climber all +through life, moves 'em and shouts 'em to "go down," to "go back," + +"The contact is getting too clost, danger is ahead." Curious, +haint it? Jest as if any danger is so dangerous as ignorance and +brutality. Curious, haint it? But I am a eppisodin', and to +resoom. + +Wall, right after the babies we'd meet a Catholic priest with a +calm and fur away look on his face, a lookin' at the crowd as if +he wuz in it, but not of it. And then a burgler, mebby, anyway a +mean lookin' creeter, ragged and humble. And then 2 or 3 men +foreign lookin', jabberin' in a tongue I know nothin' of, nor +Josiah either. And then some more childern, and wimmen, and dogs, +and parasols, and men, and babies, and Injuns, and Frenchmen, and +old young wimmen, and young old ones, and handsome ones, and +hombly ones, and parasols, and some sweet young girls ag'in, and +some black men, and some white men, and some more wimmen, and +parasols, and silk, and velvet, and lace, and puckers, and +raffles, and gethers, and gores, and flowers, and feathers, and +fringes, and frizzles, and then some men, some Southerners from +the South, some Westerners from the West, some Easterners from the +East, and some Cubebs from Cuba, and some Chinamen from China. + +Oh! what a seen! What a seen! back and forth, passin' and +repassin', to and fro, parasols, and dogs, and wimmen, and men, +and babies, and parasols, to and fro, to and fro. Why, if I stood +there long so crazed would I have become at the seen, that I +should have felt that Josiah wuz a To and I wuz a Fro, or I wuz a +parasol and he wuz a dog. + +And to prevent that fearful catastrophe, I sez, "If we ever get +beyond this side of the village that seems all run together, if we +ever do get beyond it, which seems doubtful, le's go and sit down, +in some quiet spot, and try to collect our scattered minds." Sez +I, "I feel curius, Josiah Allen!" and sez I, "How do you feel?" + +His answer I will not translate; it was neither Biblical nor even +moral. And I sez agin, "Hain't it strange that they have the +village all run together with no streets turnin' off of it." Sez +I, "It makes me feel queer, Josiah Allen, and I am a goin' to +enquire into it." So we wended our way some further on amongst +the dense crowd I have spoken of, only more crowded and more +denser, and anon, if not oftener, Josiah's head would be scooped +in by passin' parasols, and then in low, deep tones, Josiah would +use words that I wouldn't repeat for a dollar bill, till at last I +asked a by bystander a standin' by, and sez I, "Is this village +all built together -- don't you have no streets a turnin' off of +it?" + +"Yes," sez he, "you'll find a street jest as soon as you get by +this hotel." + +I stopped right in my tracts; I wuz dumbfoundered. Sez I, "Do you +mean to say that this hull side of the street that we have been a +traversin' anon, or long before anon, -- do you say that this is +all one buildin'?" + +"Yes mom," sez he. + +Sez I, in faint axents, "When shall we get to the end on it?" + +Sez he, "You have come jest about half way." + +Josiah gin a deep groan and turned him round in his tracts and +sez, "Le's go back this minute." + +I too thought of the quiet haven from whence we had set out, with +a deep longin', but sech is the force and strength of my mind that +I grasped holt of the situation and held it there tight. If we +wuz half way across it wouldn't be no further to go on than it +would to go back. Such wuz my intellect that I see it to once, +but Josiah's mind couldn't grasp it, and with words murmured in my +ears which I will never repeat to a livin' soul he wended on by my +side through the same old crowd -- parasols, and wimmen, and dogs, +and babies, and men, and parasols, and Injuns, and Spanards, and +Creoles, and pretty girls, and old wimmen, and puckers, and +gethers, and bracelets, and diamonds, and lace, and parasols. +Several times, if not more, wuz Josiah Allen scooped in by a +parasol held by a female, and I felt he wuz liable to be torn from +me. His weight is but small. 3 times his hat fell off in the +operation and wuz reskued with difficulty, and he spoke words I +blush to recall as havin' passed my pardner's lips. + +Wall, in the fullness of time, or a little after, for truly I wuz +not in a condition to sense things much, we arrove at a street and +we gladly turned our 2 frames into it, and wended our way on it, +goin' at a pretty good jog. The crowd a growin' less and less and +we kep a goin', and kep a goin', till Josiah sez in weary axents: + +"Where be you a goin', Samantha? Haint you never goin' to stop? +I am fairly tuckered out." + +And I sez in faint axents, "I would fain reach a land where +parasols and puckers are not and dogs and diamonds are no more." + +I wuz middlin' incoherent from my agitation. But I meant well. I +wuz truly in hopes I would reach some quiet place where Josiah and +me could set down alone. Where I could look in quiet and repose +upon that dear bald head, and recooperate my strength. + +We went by beautiful places, grand houses of different colors but +every one on 'em good lookin' ones, a settin' back amongst their +green trees, with shady grass-covered yards, and fountains and +flower beds in front of 'em, and more grand handsome houses, and +more big beautiful yards, green velvet grass and beautiful flowers +and fountains, and birds and beauty on every side on us. + +And though I felt and knew that in them big carriages that was a +passin' 2 and fro all the time, though I felt that parasols, and +puckers, and laces, and dogs, and diamonds, wuz a bein' borne past +me all the time, yet sech is the force of my mind that I could +withdraw my specks from 'em, and look at the beautiful works of +nater (assisted by man) that wuz about me on every hand. + +Finally my long search wuz rewarded, we came to a big open gateway +that seemed to lead into a large, quiet delightful forest. And in +that lovely, lonesome place, Josiah and me sot down to recooperate +our 2 energies. + +Josiah looked good to me. Men are nice creeters, but you don't +want to see too meny of 'em to once, likeways with wimmen. Josiah +looked to me at that moment some like a calico dress that you have +picked out of a dense quantity of patterns of calico at a store, +it looks better to you when you get it away from the rest. Josiah +Allen looked good to me. + +But anon, after I had bathed my distracted eyes (as you may say) +in the liniment of my pardner, I began to take in the rare beauty +of the seen laid out before me and we arose and wended our way +onwards peaceful and serene, as 2 childern led on by their mother. + +Dear Mother Nature! how dost thou rest and soothe thy distracted +childern when too hardly used by the grindin', oppressive hands of +fashion,and the weerisome elements of a too civilized life. Maybe +thou art a heathen mother, oneducated and ignorant in all but the +wisdom of love, but thy bosom is soft and restful, and thy arms +lovin' and tender. And, heathen if thou art, we love thee first +and at last. We are glad to slip out of all the vain and gilded +supports that have held us weerily up, and lay down our tired +heads on thy kindly and unquestionin' bosom and rest. + +As we rose from the soft turf, on which we had been a restin', and +meandered on through that beautiful park, (so tenderly had nature +used him,) not one trace of the wild commotion that had almost +rent Josiah Allen's breast, could be seen save one expirin' +threeoh of agony. As we started out ag'in, he looked down onto my +faithful umberell, that had stiddied me on so many towers of +principle, and sez he, in low concentrated axents of skern and +bitterness, "If that wuz a dumb parasol, Samantha, I would crush +it to the earth and grind it to atoms." + +Truly he could not forget how his bald head had been gethered in +like a ripe sheaf, by 7 females, during that very walk, hombly +ones too, so it had happened. But I sez nothin' in reply to this +expirin' note of the crysis he had passed through, knowin' this +was not the time for silver speech but for golden silence, and so +we meandered onwards. + +And it wuz anon that we see in the distance a fair white female a +standin' kinder still in the edge of the woods, and Josiah spoke +in a seemin'ly careless way, and sez he, "She don't seem to have +many clothes on, Samantha." + +Sez I, "Hush, Josiah! she has probably overslept herself, and come +out in a hurry, mebby to look for some herbs or sunthin'. I +persoom one of her childern are sick, and she sprung right up out +of bed, and come out to get some weather-wort, or catnip, or +sunthin'." + +And as I spoke I drawed Josiah down a side path away from her. +But he stopped stun still and sez he, "Mebby I ought to go and +help her Samantha." + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen, sense I lived with you, I don't think I have +been shamder of you;" sez I, "it would mortify her to death if she +should mistrust you had seen her in that condition." + +"Wall," sez he, still a hangin' back, "if the child is very sick, +and I can be any help to her, it is my duty to go." + +His eye had been on her nearly every moment of the time, in spite +of my almost voyalent protests, and sez he, kinder excited like, +"She is standin' stun still, as if she is skarit; mebby there is a +snake in front of her or sunthin', or mebby she is took paralysed, +I'd better go and see." + +Sez I, in low, deep axents, "You stay where you be, Josiah Allen, +and I will go forward, bein' 2 females together, it is what it is +right to do and if we need your help I will holler." + +And finally he consented after a parlay. + +Wall, as I got up to her I see she wuzn't a live, meat woman, but +a statute and so I hastened back to my Josiah and told him there +wuzn't no need of his help and he wuz in the right on't -- she wuz +stun still." + +He said he guessed we'd better go that way. And I sez, "No, +Josiah, I want to go round by the other road." + +Wall, we got back to our abode perfectly tuckered out, but +perfectly happy. And we concluded that after dinner we would set +out and see the different springs and partake of 'em. Had it not +been for our almost frenzied haste to get away from parasols and +dogs and destraction into a place of rest we should have beheld +them sooner. And our afternoon's adventures I will relate in +another epistol. + + + + +VII. + +SEEING THE DIFFERENT SPRINGS. + + +Immegeatly after dinner (a good one) Josiah Allen, Ardelia Tutt +and me sot out to view and look at the different springs and to +partake of the same. We hadn't drinked a drop of it as yet. +Ardelia had come over to go with us. She had on a kind of a +yellowish drab dress and a hat made of the same, with some drab +and blue bows of ribbon and some pink holly-hawks in it, and she +had some mits on (her hands prespired dretfully, and she sweat +easy). As I have said, she is a good lookin' girl but soft. And +most any dress she puts on kinder falls into the same looks. It +may be quite a hard lookin' dress before she puts it on, but +before she has wore it half a hour it will kinder crease down into +the softest lookin, thing you ever see. And so with her bonnets, +and mantillys, and everything. + +The down onto a goslin's breast never looked softer than every rag +she had on this very afternoon, and no tender goslin' itself wuz +ever softer than she wuz on the inside on't. But that didn't +hinder my likin' her. + +Wall, anon, or a little before, we came to that long, long +buildin', beautiful and dretful ornimental, but I could see plain +by daylight what I had mistrusted before, that it wuzn't built for +warmth. It must be dretful cold in the winter, and I don't see +how the wimmen folks of the home could stand it, unless they hang +up bed quilts and blankets round the side, and then, I should +think they would freeze. They couldn't keep their house plants +over winter any way - and I see they had sights of 'em - unless +they kep' 'em down suller. + +But howsumever, that is none of my lookout. If they want to be so +fashionable, as to try to live out doors and in the house too, +that is none of my business. And of course it looked dretful +ornimental and pretty. But I will say this, it haint bein' mejum. +I should rather live either out doors, or in the house, one of the +2. But I am a eppisodin'. And to resoom. + +Josiah Allen paid the money demanded of him and we went in and +advanced onwards to where a boy wuz a pullin' up the water and +handin' of it round. + +It looked dretful bubblin' and sparklin'. Why sunthin' seemed to +be a sparklin' up all the time in the water and I thought to +myself mebby it wuz water thoughts, mebby it wanted to tell +sunthin', mebby it has all through these years been a tryin' to +bubble up and sparkle out in wisdom but haint found any one yet +who could understand its liquid language. Who knows now? + +I took my glass and looked close - sparkle, sparkle, up came the +tiny thought sparks! But I wuzn't wise enough to read the +glitterin' language. No I wuzn't deep enough. It would take a +deep mind, mebby thousands of feet deep, to understand the great +glowin' secret that it has been a tryin' to reveal and couldn't. +Mebby it has been a tryin' to tell of big diamond mines that it +has passed through - great cliffs and crags of gold sot deep with +the crystalized dew of diamonds. + +But no, I didn't believe that wuz it. That wouldn't help the +world, only to make it happier, and these seemed to me to be +dretful inspirin', upliftin' thoughts. No, mebby it is a tryin' +to tell a cold world about a way to heat it. Mebby it has been a +runnin' over and is sparklin' with bright thoughts about how deep +underneath the earth lay a big fireplace, that all the cold +beggars of mortality could set round and warm their frozen fingers +by, - a tryin' to tell how the heat of that fire that escapes now +up the chimbleys of volcanoes, and sometimes in sudden drafts +blows out sideways into earthquakes, etc., could be utilized by +conveyin' it up on top of the ground, and have it carried into the +houses like Croton water. Who knows now? Mebby that is it! + +Oh! I felt that it would be a happy hour for Samantha when she +could bile her potatoes by the heat of that large noble fire-place. +And more than that, far more wuz the thought that heat might become, +in the future, as cheap as cold. That the little cold hands that +freeze every winter in the big cities, could be stretched out before +the big generous warmth of that noble fire-place. And who built +that fire in the first place? Who laid the first sticks on the +handirons, and put the match to it? Who wuz it that did it, and +how did he look, and when wuz he born, and why, and where? + +These, and many other thoughts of similar size and shape, filled +my brane almost full enough to lift up the bunnet, that reposed +gracefully on my foretop, as I stood and held the sparklin' glass +in my hands. + +Sparkle! sparkle! sparkle! what wuz it, it wuz a tryin' to say to +me and couldn't? Good land! I couldn't tell, and Josiah +couldn't, I knew instinctively he couldn't, though I didn't ask +him. + +No, I turned and looked at that beloved man, for truly I had for +the time bein' been by the side of myself, and I see that he wuz +a drinkin' lavishly of the noble water. I see that he wuz a +drinkin' more than wuz for his good, his linement showed it, and +sez I, for he wuz a liftin' another tumbler full onto his lips, +sez I, "Pause, Josiah Allen, and don't imbibe too much." + +"Why," he whispered, "you can drink all you are a mind to for 5 +cents. I am bound for once, Samantha Allen, to get the worth of +my money." + +And he drinked the tumbler full down at one swoller almost, and +turned to the weary boy for another. He looked bad, and eager, +and sez I, "How many have you drinked?" + +Sez he, in a eager, animated whisper, "9." And he whispered in +the same axents, "5 times 9 is 45 ; if it had been to a fair, or +Fourth of July, or anything, it would have cost me 45 cents, and +if it had been to a church social - lemme see - 9 times 10 is 90. +It would have cost me a dollar bill! And here I am a havin' it +all for 5 cents. Why," sez he, "I never see the beat on't in my +life." + +And ag'in he drinked a tumbler full down, and motioned to the +frightened boy for another. + +But I took him by the vest and whispered to him, sez I, "Josiah +Allen, do you want to die, because you can die cheap? Why," sez +I, "it will kill you to drink so much." + +"But think of the cheapness on't Samantha! The chance I have of +getting the worth of my money." + +But I whispered back to him in anxus axents and told him, that I +guessed if funeral expenses wuz added to that 5 cents it wouldn't +come so cheap, and sez I, "you wont live through many more glasses, +and you'll see you wont. Why," sez I, "you are a drowndin' out +your insides." + +He wuz fairly a gettin' white round the mouth, and I finally got +him to withdraw, though he looked back longingly at the tumblers +and murmured even after I had got him to the door, that it wuz a +dumb pity when anybody got a chance to get the worth of their +money, which wuzn't often, to think they couldn't take advantage +on it. + +And I sez back to him in low deep axents, "There is such a thing +as bein' too graspin', Josiah Allen." Sez I, "The children of +Israel used to want to lay up more manny than they wanted or +needed, and it spilte on their hands." And sez I, "you see if it +haint jest so with you; you have been in too great haste to enrich +yourself, and you'll be sorry for it, you see if you haint." + +And he was. Though he uttered language I wouldn't wish to repeat, +about the children of Israel and about me for bringin' of 'em up. +But the man wuz dethly sick. Why he had drinked 11 tumblers full, +and I trembled to think what would have follered on, and ensued, +if I hadn't interfered. As it wuz, he wuz confined to our abode +for the rest of the day. + +But I wouldn't have Josiah Allen blamed more than is due for this +little incedent, for it only illustrates a pervailin' trait in +men's nater, and sometimes wimmen's - a too great desire to amass +sudden riches, and when opportunity offers, burden themselves with +useless and wearysome and oft-times painful gear. + +They don't need it but seeing they have a chance to get it cheap, +"dog cheap " as the poet observes, why they weight themselves down +with it, and then groan under the burden of unnecessary and wearin' +wealth. This is a deep subject, deep as the well from which my +companion drinked, and nearly drinked himself into a untimely grave. + +Men heap up more riches than they can enjoy and then groan and +rithe under the taxes, the charity given, the envy, the noteriety, +the glare, and the glitter, the crowd of fortune-hunters and +greedy hangers-on, and the care and anxiety. They orniment the +high front of their houses with the paint, the gildin', the +fashion, and the show of enormous wealth, and while the crowd of +fashion-seekers and fortune-hunters pour in and out of the lofty +doorway they set out on the back stoop a groanin' and a sithin' at +the cares and sleepless anxietes of their big wealth, and then +they git up and go down street and try their best to heap up more +treasure to groan over. + +And wimmen now, when wuz there ever a woman who could resist a +good bargain? Her upper beauro draws may be a runnin' over with +laces and ribbons, but let her see a great bargain sold for +nothin' almost, and where is the female woman that can resist +addin' to that already too filled up beauro draw. + +A baby, be he a male, or be he a female child, when he has got a +appel in both hands, will try to lay holt of another, if you hold +it out to him. It is human nater. Josiah must not be considered +as one alone in layin' up more riches than he needed. He suffered, +and I also, for sech is the divine law of love, that if one member +of the family suffers, the other members suffer also, specially +when the sufferin' member is impatient and voyalent is his distress, +and talks loud and angry at them who truly are not to blame. + +Now I didn't make the springs nor I wuzn't to blame for their +bein' discovered in the first place. But Josiah laid it to me. +And though I tried to make him know that it wuz a Injun that +discovered 'em first, he wouldn't gin in and seemed to think they +wouldn't have been there if it hadn't been for me. + +I hated to hear him go on so. And in the cause of Duty, I brung +up Sir William Johnson and others. But he lay there on the lounge, +and kep' his face turned resolute towards the wall, in a dretful +oncomfertable position (sech wuz his temper of mind), and said, +he never had heard of them, nor the springs nuther, and shouldn't +if it hadn't been for me. + +Why, sez I, "A Injun brought Sir William Johnson here on his +back." + +"Wall," sez he, cross as a bear, "that is the way you'll have to +take me back, if you go on in this way much longer." + +"In what way, Josiah?" sez I. + +"Why a findin' springs and draggin' a man off to 'em, and makin' +him drink." + +"Why, Josiah Allen," sez I, "I told you not to drink - don't you +remember?" + +"No! I don't remember nuthin', nor don't want to. I want to go +to sleep!" sez he, snappish as anything, so I went out and let him +think if he wanted to, that I made the Springs, and the Minerals, +and the Gysers, and the Spoutin' Rock, and everything. Good land! +I knew I didn't; but I had to rest under the unkind insinnuation. +Such is some of the trials of pardners. + +But Josiah waked up real clever. And I brung him up some delicate +warm toast and some fragrant tea, and his smile on me wuz dretful +good-natured, almost warm. And I forgot all his former petulence +and basked in the rays of love and happiness that beamed on me out +of the blue sky of my companion's eyes. The clear blue sky that +held two stars, to which my heart turned. + +Such is some of the joys of pardners with which the world don't +meddle with, nor can't destroy. + +But to resoom. Ardelia sot down awhile in our room before she +went back to her boardin' house. I see she wuz a writin' for she +had a long lead pencil in her right hand and occasionally she +would lean her forrerd down upon it, in deep thought, and before +she went, she slipped the verses into my hand. + +Sez I, a lookin' over my specks at Ardelia after I had finished +readin' the verses: "What does 'ron' mean? I never heerd of that +word before, nor knew there wuz sech a one." + +Sez she, "I meant ran, but I s'pose it is a poetical license to +say 'ron,' don't you think so?" + +"Oh, yes," sez I, "I s'pose so, I don't know much about licenses, +nor don't want to, they are suthin' I never believed in. But," +sez I, for I see she looked red and overcasted by my remarks, "I +don't s'pose it will make any difference in a 100 years whether +you say ran or ron." + +But sez I, "Ardelia, it is a hot day, and I wouldn't write any +more if I wuz in your place. If you should heat your bra-, the +upper part of your head, you might not get over it for some time." + +"But," sez she, "you have told me sometimes to stop on account of +cold weather." + +"Wall," sez I, "most any kind of weather is hard on some kinds of +poetry." Sez I, "Poetry is sunthin' that takes particular kinds +of folks and weather to be successful." Sez I, "It is sunthin' +that can't be tampered with with impunity by Christians or world's +people. It is a kind of a resky thing to do, and I wouldn't write +any more to-day, Ardelia." + +And she heard to me and after a settin' a while with us, she went +back to Mr. Pixley's. + + + + +VIII. + +JOSIAH AND SAMANTHA TAKE A LONG WALK. + + +Wall, we hadn't been to Saratoga long before Aunt Polly Pixley +came over to see us, for Aunt Polly had been as good as her word +and had come to Saratoga, to her 2d cousins, the Mr. Pixley'ses, +where Ardelia wuz a stopping. Ardelia herself is a distant +relation to Aunt Polly, quite distant, about 40 or 50 miles +distant when they are both to home. + +Wall, the change in Aunt Polly is wonderful, perfectly wonderful. +She don't look like the same woman. + +She took her knittin' work and come in the forenoon, for a all +day's visit, jest as she wuz used to in the country, good old soul +- and I took her right to my room and done well by her, and we +talked considerable about other wimmen, not runnin' talk, but good +plain talk. + +She thinks a sight of the Saratoga water, and well she may, if +that is what has brung her up, for she wuz always sick in +Jonesville, kinder bedrid. And when she sot out for Saratoga she +had to have a piller to put on the seat behind her to sort a prop +her up (hen's feather). + +And now, she told me she got up early every mornin' and walked +down to the spring for a drink of the water - walked afoot. And +she sez, "It is astonishin' how much good that water is a doin' +me; for," sez she, "when I am to home I don't stir out of the +house from one day's end to the other; and here," sez she, "I set +out doors all day a'most, a listenin' to the music in the park +mornin' and evenin' I hear every strain on't." + +Aunt Polly is the greatest one for music I ever see, or hearn on. +And I sez to her, "Don't you believe that one great thing that is +helpin' you, is bein' where you are kep' gay and cheerful, - by +music and good company; and bein' out so much in the sunshine and +pure air." (Better air than Saratoga has got never wuz made; that +is my opinion and Josiah's too.) And sez I, "I lay a good deal to +that air." + +"No," she said, "it wuz the water." + +Sez I, "The water is good, I don't make no doubts on't." But I +continued calmly - for though I never dispute, I do most always +maintain my opinion - and I sez again calmly, "There has been a +great change in you for the better, sense you come here, Miss +Pixley. But some on't I lay to your bein' where things are so +much more cheerful and happyfyin'. You say you haint heerd a +strain of music except a base viol for over 14 years before you +come here. And though base viols if played right may be +melodious, yet Sam Pixley's base viol wuz a old one, and sort a +cracked and grumbly in tone, and he wuzn't much of a player +anyway, and to me, base viols always sounded kinder base anyway." + +And sez I, "Don't you believe a gettin' out of your little low +dark rooms, shaded by Pollard willers and grave stuns, and gettin' +out onto a place where you can heer sweet music from mornin' till +night, a liftin' you up and makin' you happier - don't you believe +that has sunthin' to do with your feelin' so much better - that +and the pure sweet air of the mountains comin' down and bein' +softened and enriched by the breath of the valley, and the minerals, +makin' a balmy atmosphere most full of balm - I lay a good deal to +that." + +"Oh no," sez she, "it is the water." + +"Yes," sez I, in a very polite way, - I will be polite, "the water +is good, first rate." + +But at that very minute, word come to her that she had company, +and she sot sail homewards immegetly, and to once. + +And now I don't care anything for the last word, some wimmen do, +but I don't. But I sez to her, as I watched her a goin' down the +stairway, steppin' out like a girl almost, sez I, "How well you do +seem, Aunt Polly; and I lay a good deal on't to that air." + +Now who would have thought she would speak out from the bottom of +the stairway and say, "No, it is the water?" + +Wall, the water is good, there haint no doubt, and anyway, through +the water and the air, and bein' took out of her home cares, and +old surroundin's onto a brght happy place, the change in Polly +Pixley is sunthin' to be wondered at. + +Yes, the water is good. And it is dretful smart, knowin' water +too. Why, wouldn't anybody think that when it all comes from the +same place, or pretty nigh the same place anyway, that they would +get kinder flustrated and mixed up once in a while? + +But they don't. These hundreds and thousands of years, and I +don't know how much longer, they have kep' themselves separate +from each other, livin' nigh neighbors there down under the +ground, but never neighborin' with each other, or intermarryin' in +each other's families. No, they have kep' themselves apart, +livin' exclosive down below and bubblin' up exclosive. + +They know how to make each other keep their proper distance, and I +s'pose through all the centuries to come they will bubble up, +right side by side, entirely different from each other. + +Curius, hain't it? Dretful smart, knowin' waters they be, fairly +sparklin' and flashin' with light and brightness, and intelligence. +They are for the healin' and refreshin' of ,the nations, and the +nations are all here this summer, a bein' healed by 'em. But still +I lay a good deal to that air. + +Amongst the things that Aunt Polly told me about wimmen that day, +wuz this, that Ardelia Tutt had got a new Bo, Bial Flamburg, by +name. + +She said Mr. Flamburg had asked Ardelia's 3d cousin to introduce +him to her, and from that time his attentions to her had been +unremittent, voyalent, and close. She said that to all human +appearance he wuz in love with her from his hat band down to his +boots and she didn't know what the result would be, though she +felt that the situation wuz dangerus, and more'n probable Abram +Gee had more trouble ahead on him. (Aunt Polly jest worships +Abram Gee, jest as everybody duz that gets to know him well.) +And I too, felt that the situation wuz dubersome. For Ardelia I +knew wuz one of the soft little wimmen that has got to have men +a trailin' round after 'em; and her bein' so uncommon tender +hearted, and Mr. Flamburg so deep in love, I feared the result. + +Wall, I wuz jest a thinkin' of this that day after dinner when +Josiah proposed a walk, so we sot out. He proposed we should walk +through the park, so we did. The air wuz heavenly sweet and that +park is one of the most restful and beautiful places this side of +Heaven, or so it seemed to us that pleasant afternoon. The music +was very soft and sweet that day, sweet with a undertone of +sadness, some like a great sorrowful soul in a beautiful body. + +The balmy south wind whispered through the branches of the bendin' +trees on the hill where we sot. The light was a shinin' and a +siftin' down through the green leaves, in a soft golden haze, and +the music seemed to go right up into them shadowy, shinin' pathways +of golden misty light, a climbin' up on them shadowy steps of mist +and gold, and amber, up, up into the soft depths of the blue +overhead - up to the abode of melody and love. + +Down the hill in the beautiful little valley, all amongst the +fountains and windin' walks and white statutes, and green, green, +grass, little children wuz a playin'. Sweet little toddlers, jest +able to walk about, and bolder spirits, though small, a trudgin' +about with little canes, and jumpin' round, and havin' a good +time. + +Little boys and little girls (beautiful creeters, the hull on +'em), for if their faces, every one on 'em, wuzn't jest perfect! +They all had the beauty of childhood and happiness. And crowds of +older folks wuz there. And some happy young couples, youths and +maidens, wuz a settin' round, and a wanderin' off by themselves, +and amongst them we see the form of Ardelia, and a young man by +her side. + +She wuz a leanin' on the stun railin' that fences in the trout +pond. She wuz evidently a lookin' down pensively at the shinin' +dartin' figures of the trout, a movin' round down in the cool +waters. + +I wuzn't nigh enough to 'em to see really how her companion +looked, but even at that distance I recognized a certain air and +atmosphere a surroundin' Ardelia that I knew meant poetry. + +And Josiah recognized it too, and he sez to me, "We may as well go +round the hill and out to the road that way," sez he, (a pointin' +to the way furthest from Ardelia) "and we may as well be a goin'." + +That man abhors poetry. + +Wall, we wandered down into the high way and havin' most the hull +afternoon before us, we kinder sauntered round amongst the stores +that wuz pretty nigh to where we wuz. There is some likely good +lookin' stores kep' by the natives, as they call the stiddy +dwellers in Saratoga. Good lookin' respectable stores full of +comfort and consolation, for the outer or inner man or woman. (I +speak it in a mortal sense). + +But with the hundred thousand summer dwellers, who flock here with +the summer birds, and go out before the swallers go south, there +comes lots of summer stores, and summer shops, and picture +studios, etc., etc. Like big summer bird's-nests, all full and a +runnin' over with summer wealth, to be blowed down by the autumn +winds. These shops are full of everything elegant and beautiful +and useful. The most gorgeous vases and plaks and chiner ware of +every description and color, and books, and jewelry, and rugs, and +fans, and parasols, and embroideries, and laces, and etc., etc., +etc. + +And one shop seemed to be jest full of drops of light, light and +sunshine, crystalized in golden, clear, tinted amber. There wuz a +young female statute a standin' up in the winder of that store +with her hands outstretched and jest a drippin' with the great +glowin' amber drops. Some wuz a hangin' over her wings for she +was a young flyin' female. And I thought to myself it must be she +would fly better with all that golden light a drippin' about her. + +Josiah liked her looks first rate. And he liked the looks of some +of the pictures extremely. There wuz lots of places all full of +pictures. A big collection of water colors, though as Josiah said +and well said, How they could get so many colors out of water wuz +a mystery to him. + +But my choice out of all the pictures I see, wuz a little one +called "The Sands of Dee." It wuz "Mary a callin' the cattle +home." The cruel treacherus water wuz a risin' about her round +bare ankles as she stood there amongst the rushes with her little +milk-bucket on her arm. + +Her pretty innocent face wuz a lookin' off into the shadows, and +the last ray of sunset was a fallin' on her. Maybe it wuz the +pity on't that struck so hard as I looked at it, to know that the +"cruel, crawli'n foam" wuz so soon to creep over the sweet young +face and round limbs. And there seemed to be a shadow of the +comin' fate, a sweepin' in on the gray mist behind her. + +I stood for some time, and I don't know but longer, a lookin' at +it, my Josiah a standin' placidly behind me, a lookin' over my +shoulder and enjoyin' of it too, till the price wuz mentioned. +But at that fearful moment, my pardner seized me by the arm, and +walked me so voyalently out of that store and down the walk that I +did not find and recover myself till we stood at the entrance to +Philey street. + +And I wuz so out of breath, by his powerful speed, that she didn't +look nateral to me, I hardly recognized Philey. But Josiah +hurried me down Philey and wanted to get my mind offen Mary Dee I +knew, for he says as we come under a sign hangin' down over the +road, "Horse Exchange," sez he, "What do you say, Samantha, do you +spose I could change off the old mair, for a camel or sunthin'? +How would you like a camel to ride?" + +I looked at him in speechless witherin' silence, and he went on +hurridly, "It would make a great show in Jonesville, wouldn't it, +to see us comin' to meetin' on a camel, or to see us ridin' in a +cutter drawed by one. I guess I'll see about it, some other +time." + +And he went on hurridly, and almost incoherently as we see another +sign, over the road - oh! how vollubly he did talk - "Quick, +Livery." + +"I hate to see folks so dumb conceeted! Now I don't spose that +man has got any hosses much faster than the old mair." + +"'Wing's!' Shaw! I don't believe no such thing - a livery on +wings. I don't believe a word on't. And you wouldn't ketch me on +one on 'em, if they had!" + +"'Yet Sing!"' sez he, a lookin' accost the street into a laundry +house. "What do I care if you do sing? 'Taint of much account if +you do any way. I sing sometimes, I yet sing," says he. + +"Sing," sez I in neerly witherin' tone. "I'd love to hear you +sing, I haint yet and I've lived with you agoin' on 30 years." + +"Wall, if you haint heerd me, it is because you are deef," sez he. + +But that is jest the way he kep' on, a hurryin' me along, and a +talkin' fast to try to get the price of that picture out of my +head. Anon, and sometimes oftener, we would come to the word in +big letters on signs, or on the fence, or the sides of barns, +"Pray." And sometimes it would read, "Pray for my wife!" And +Josiah every time he came to the words would stop and reflect on +'em. + +"`Pray!' What business is it of yourn, whether I pray or not? +`Pray for my wife!' That haint none of your business." + +Sez he, a shakin' his fist at the fence, "'Taint likely I should +have a wife without prayin' for her. She needs it bad enough," +sez he once, as he stood lookin' at it. + +I gin him a strange look, and he sez, "You wouldn't like it, would +you, if I didn't pray for you?" + +"No," sez I, "and truly as you say, the woman who is your wife +needs prayer, she needs help, morn half the time she duz." + +He looked kinder dissatisfied at the way I turned it, but he sez, +"'Plumbin' done here!'" + +"I'd love to know where they are goin' to plum. I don't see no +sign of plum trees, nor no stick to knock 'em off with." And agin +he sez, "You would make a great 'fuss, Samantha, if I should say +what is painted up right there on that cross piece. You would say +I wuz a swearin'." + +Sez I coldly, (or as cold as I could with my blood heated by the +voyalence and rapidity of the walk he had been a leadin' me,) +"There is a Van in front of it. Van Dam haint swearin'." + +"You would say it wuz if I used it," sez he reproachfully. "If I +should fall down on the ice, or stub my toe, and trip up on the +meetin' house steps, and I should happen to mention the name of +that street about the same time, you would say I wuz a swearin'." + +I did not reply to him; I wouldn't. And ag'in he hurried me on'ards +by some good lookin' bildin's, and trees, and tavrens, and cottages, +and etc., etc., and we come to Caroline street, and Jane, and +Matilda, and lots of wimmen's names. + +And Josiah sez, "I'll bet the man that named them streets wuz love +sick!" + +But he wuzn't no such thing. It was a father that owned the land, +and laid out the streets, and named 'em for his daughters. Good +old creeter! I wuzn't goin' to have him run at this late day, and +run down his own streets too. + +But ag'in Josiah hurried me on'ards. And bimeby we found +ourselves a standin' in front of a kind of a lonesome lookin' +house, big and square, with tall pillows in front. It wuz a +standin' back as if it wuz a kinder a drawin' back from company, +in a square yard all dark and shady with tall trees. And it all +looked kinder dusky, and solemn like. And a bystander a standin' +by told us that it wuz "ha'nted." + +Josiah pawed at it, and shawed at the idee of a gost. + +But I sez, "There! that is the only thing Saratoga lacked to make +her perfectly interestin', and that is a gost!" + +But agin Josiah pawed at the idee, and sez, "There never wuz such +a thing as a gost! and never will be." And sez he, "what an +extraordenary idiot anybody must be to believe in any sech thing." +And ag'in he looked very skernful and high-headed, and once ag'in +he shawed. + +And I kep' pretty middlin' calm and serene and asked the +bystander, when the gost ha'nted, and where? + +And he said, it opened doors and blowed out lights mostly, and +trampled up stairs. + +"Openin', and blowin', and tramplin'," sez I dreamily. + +"Yes," sez the man, "that's what it duz." + +And agin Josiah shawed loud. And agin I kep' calm, and sez I, +"I'd give a cent to see it." And sez I, "Do you suppose it would +blow out and trample if we should go in?" + +But Josiah grasped holt of my arm and sez, "'Taint safe! my dear +Samantha! don't le's go near the house." + +"Why? " sez I coldly, "you say there haint no sech thing as a +gost, what are you afraid on?" + +His teeth wuz fairly chatterin'. "Oh! there might be spiders +there, or mice, it haint best to go." + +I turned silently round and started on, for my companion's looks +was pitiful in the extreme. But I merely observed this, as we +wended onwards, "I have always noticed this, Josiah Allen, that +them that shaw the most at sech things, are the ones whose teeth +chatter when they come a nigh 'em, showin' plain that the shawers +are really the ones that believe in 'em." + +"My teeth chattered," sez he, "because my gooms ache." + +"Well," sez I, "the leest said the soonest mended." And we went +on fast ag'in by big houses and little, and boardin' houses, and +boardin' houses, and boardin' houses, and tavrens, and tavrens, +and he kept me a walkin' till my feet wuz most blistered. + +I see what his aim wuz; I had recognized it all the hull time. + +But as we went up the stairway into our room, perfectly tuckered +out, both on us, I sez to him, in weary axents, "That picture wuz +cheap enough, for the money, wuzn't it?" + +He groaned aloud. And sech is my love for that man, that the +minute I heard that groan I immegetly added, "Though I hadn't no +idee of buyin' it, Josiah." + +Immegetly he smiled warmly, and wuz very affectionate in his +demeener to me for as much as two hours and a half. Sech is the +might of human love. + +His hurryin' me over them swelterin' and blisterin' streets, and +showin' me all the beauty and glory of the world, and his +conversation had no effect, skercely on my mind. But what them +hours of frenzied effert could not accomplish, that one still, +small groan did. I love that man. I almost worship him, and he +me, vise versey, and the same. + +We found that Ardelia Tutt had been to see us in our absence. She +had been into our room I see, for she had dropped one of her mits +there. And the chambermaid said she had been in and waited for us +quite a spell - the young man a waitin' below on the piazza, so I +s'posed. + +I expect Ardelia wanted to show him off to us and I myself wuz +quite anxus to see him, feelin' worried and oncomfertable about +Abram Gee and wantin' to see if this young chap wuz anywhere nigh +as good as Abram. + +Well about a hour after we came back, Josiah missed his glasses he +reads with. And we looked all over the house for 'em, and under +the bed, and on the ceilin', and through our trunks and bandboxes, +and all our pockets, and in the Bible, and Josiah's boots, and +everywhere. And finely, after givin' 'em up as lost, the idee +come to us that they might possibly have ketched on the fringe of +Ardelia's shawl, and so rode home with her on it. + +So we sent one of the office-boys home with her mit and asked her +if she had seen Josiah's glasses. And word come back by the boy +that she hadn't seen 'em, and she sent word to me to look on my +pardner's head for 'em, and sure enough there we found 'em, right +on his foretop, to both of our surprises. + +She sent also by the boy a poem she had wrote that afternoon, and +sent word how sorry she wuz I wuzn't to home to see Mr. Flamburg. +But I see him only a day or two after that, and I didn't like his +looks a mite. + +But he said, and stuck to it, that his father owned a large bank, +that he wuz a banker, and a doin' a heavy business. + +Wall, that raised him dretfully in Ardelia's eyes; she owned up to +me that it did. She owned to me that she lead always thought she +would love to be a Banker's Bride. She thought it sounded rich. +She said, "banker sounded so different from baker." + +I sez to her coolly, that "it wuz only a difference of one letter, +and I never wuz much of a one to put the letter N above any of the +others, or to be haughty on havin' it added to, or diminished from +my name." + +But she kep' on a goin' with him. She told me it wuz real +romanticle the way he got aquanted with her. He see her onbeknown +to her one day, when she wuz a writin' a poem on one of the +benches in the park. + +"A Poem on a Bench!" + +She wuz a settin' on the bench, and a writin' about it, she was a +writin' on the bench in two different ways. Curius, haint it? + +But to resoom. He immegetly fell in love with her. And he got a +feller who wuz a boardin' to his boardin' place to interduce him +to Ardelia's relative, Mr. Pixley, and Mr. Pixley interduced him +to Ardelia. He told Ardelia's relatives the same story - That +his father wuz a banker, that he owned a bank and wuz doin' a +heavy business. + +Wall, I watched that young chap, and watched him close, and I see +there wuz one thing about him that could be depended on, he wuz +truthful. + +He seemed almost morbid on the subject, and would dispute himself +half a hour, to get a thing or a story he wuz tellin' jest exactly +right. But he drinked; that I know for I know the symptoms. +Coffee can't blind the eyes of her that waz once Smith, nor +peppermint cast a mist before 'em. My nose could have took its +oath, if noses wuz ever put onto a bar of Justice - my nose would +have gin its firm testimony that Bial Flamburg drinked. + +And there wuz that sort of a air about him, that I can't describe +exactly - a sort of a half offish, half familier and wholly +disagreeable mean, that can be onderstood but not described. No, +you can't picture that liniment, but you can be affected by it. +Wall, Bial had it. + +And I kep' on a not likin' him, and kep' stiddy onwards a likin' +Abram Gee. I couldn't help it, nor did'nt want to. And I looked +out constant to ketch him in some big story that would break him +right down in Ardelia's eyes, for I knew if she had been brought +up on any one commandment more'n another, it wuz the one ag'inst +lyin'. She hated lyin'. + +She had been brought up on the hull of the commandments but on +that one in particeler; she wuz brung up sharp but good. But not +one lie could I ketch him in. And he stuck to it, that his father +wuz a banker and doin' a heavy business. + +Wall, it kep' on, she a goin' with him through ambition, for I see +plain, by signs I knoo, that she didn't love him half as well as +she did Abram. And I felt bad, dretful bad, to set still and see +Ambition ondoin' of her. For oft and oft she would speak to me of +Bial's father's bank and the heft of the business he wuz a doin'. + +And I finally got so worked up in my mind that I gin a sly hint to +Abram Gee, that if he ever wanted to get Ardelia Tutt, he had +better make a summer trip to Saratoga. I never told Ardelia what +I had done, but trusted to a overrulin' destiny, that seems to +enrap babys, and lunatiks, and soft little wimmen, when their +heads get kinder turned by a man, and to Abram's honest face when +she should compare it with Bial Flamburg's, and to Abram's pure, +sweet breath with that mixture of stale cigars, tobacco, beer, and +peppermint. + +But Abram wrote back to me that his mother wuz a lyin' at the +p'int of death with a fever - that his sister Susan wuz sick a bed +with the same fever and couldn't come a nigh her and he couldn't +leave what might be his mother's death-bed. And he sez, if +Ardelia had forgot him in so short a time, mebby it wuz the best +thing he could do, to try and forget her. Anyway, he wouldn't +leave his dying mother for anything or anybody. + +That wuz Abram Gee all over, a doin' his duty every time by bread +and humanity. But he added a postscript and it wuz wrote in a +agitated hand - that jest as soon as his mother got so he could +leave her, he should come to Saratoga. + + + + +IX. + +JOSIAH 'S FLIRTATIONS. + + +They say there is a sight of flirtin' done at Saratoga. I didn't +hear so much about it as Josiah did, naturally there are things +that are talked of more amongst men than women. Night after night +he would come home and tell me how fashionable it wuz, and pretty +soon I could see that he kinder wanted to follow the fashion. + +I told him from the first on't that he'd better let it entirely +alone. Says I, "Josiah Allen, you wouldn't never carry it through +successful if you should undertake it -- and then think of the +wickedness on't." + +But he seemed sot. He said "it wuz more fashionable amongst +married men and wimmen, than the more single ones," he said "it +wuz dretful fashionable amongst pardners."` + +"Wall," says I, "I shall have, nothin' to do with it, and I advise +you, if you know when you are well off, to let it entirely alone." + +"Of course," says he, fiercely, "You needn't have nothin' to do +with it. It is nothin' you would want to foller up. And I would +ruther see you sunk into the ground, or be sunk myself, than to +see you goin' into it. Why," says he, savagely, "I would tear a +man lim from lim, if I see him a tryin' to flirt with you." +(Josiah Allen worships me.) "But," says he, more placider like, +"men have to do things sometimes, that they know is too hard for +their pardners to do -- men sometimes feel called upon to do +things that their pardners don't care about -- that they haint +strong enough to tackle. Wimmen are fragile creeters anyway." + +"Oh, the fallacy of them arguments -- and the weakness of 'em. + +But I didn't say nothin' only to reiterate my utterance, that "if +he went into it, he would have to foller it up alone, that he +musn't expect any help from me." + +"Oh no!" says he. "Oh! certainly not." + +His tone wuz very genteel, but there seemed to be sumthin' strange +in it. And I looked at him pityin'ly over my specks. The hull +idea on it wuz extremely distasteful to me, this talk about +flirtin', and etc., at our ages, and with our stations in the +Jonesville meetin' house, and with our grandchildren. + +But I see from day to day that he wuz a hankerin' after it, and I +almost made up my mind that I should have to let him make a trial, +knowin' that experience wuz the best teacher, and knowin' that his +morals wuz sound, and he wuz devoted to me, and only went into the +enterprize because he thought it wuz fashionable. + +There wuz a young English girl a boardin' to the same place we +did. She dressed some like a young man, carried a cane, etc. But +she wuz one of the upper 10, and wuz as pretty as a picture, and I +see Josiah had kinder sot his eyes on her as bein' a good one to +try his experiment with. He thought she wuz beautiful. But good +land! I didn't care. I liked her myself. But I could see, though +he couldn't see it, that she wuz one of the girls who would flirt +with the town pump, or the meetin' house steeple, if she couldn't +get nobody else to flirt with. She wuz born so, but I suppose +ontirely unbeknown to her when she wuz born. + +Wall, Josiah Allen would set and look at her by the hour -- +dretful admirin'. But good land! I didn't care. I loved to look +at her myself. And then too I had this feelin' that his morals +wuz sound. But after awhile, I could see, and couldn't help +seein', that he wuz a tryin' in his feeble way to flirt with her. +And I told him kindly, but firmly, "that it wuz somethin' that I +hated to see a goin' on." + +But he says, "Well, dumb it all, Samantha, if anybody goes to a +fashionable place, they ort to try to be fashionable. 'Taint +nothin' I want to do, and you ort to know it." + +And I says in pityin' axents but firm, "If you don't want to, +Josiah, I wouldn't, fashion or no fashion." + +But I see I couldn't convince him, and there happened to be a +skercity of men jest then -- and he kep' it up, and it kep' me on +the key veav, as Maggie says, when she is on the tenter hooks of +suspense. + +I felt bad to see it go on, not that I wuz jealous, no, my foretop +lay smooth from day to day, not a jealous hair in it, not one -- +but I felt sorry for my companion. I see that while the endurin' +of it wuz hard and tejus for him (for truly he was not a addep at +the business; it come tuff, feerful tuff on him), the endin' wuz +sure to be harder. And I tried to convince him, from a sense of +duty, that she wuz makin' fun of him -- he had told me lots of the +pretty things she had said to him -- and out of principle I told +him that she didn't mean one word of 'em. But I couldn't convince +him, and as is the way of pardners, after I had sot the reasen and +the sense before him, and he wouldn't hear to me, why then I had +to set down and bear it. Such is some of the trials of pardners? + +Wall, it kep' agoin' on, and a goin' on, and I kep' a hatin' to +see it, for if anybody has got to flirt, which I am far from +approvin' of, but if I have got to see it a goin' on, I would fain +see it well done, and Josiah's efforts to flirt wuz like an effort +of our old mair to play a tune on the melodian, no grace in it, no +system, nor comfort to him, nor me. + +I s'pose the girl got some fun out of it; I hope she did, for if +she didn't it wuz a wearisome job all round. + +Wall, a week or so rolled on, and it wuz still in progress. And +one day an old friend of ours, Miss Ezra Balch, from the east part +of Jonesville, come to see me. She come to Saratoga for the +rheumatiz, and wuz gettin' well fast, and Ezra was gettin' entirely +cured of biles, for which he had come, carbunkles. + +Wall, she invited Josiah and me to take a ride with 'em, and we +both accepted of it, and at the appointed time I wuz ready to the +minute, down on the piazza, with my brown cotton gloves on, and my +mantilly hung gracefully over my arm. But at the last minute, +Josiah Allen said "he couldn't go." + +I says "Why can't you go?" + +"Oh," he says, kinder drawin' up his collar, and smoothin' down +his vest, "Oh, I have got another engagement." + +He looked real high-headed, and I says to him: + +"Josiah Allen didn't you promise Druzilla Balch that you would go +with her and Ezra to-day?" + +"Wall yes," says he, "but I can't." + +"Why not?" says I. + +"Wall, Samantha, though they are well meanin', good people, they +haint what you may call fashionable, they haint the upper 10." + +Says I, "Josiah Allen you have fell over 15 cents in my estimation, +sense we have begun talkin', you won't go with 'em because they +haint fashionable. They are good, honest Christian Methodists, +and have stood by you and me many a time, in times of trouble, +and now," says I, "you turn against 'em because they haint +fashionable." Says I, "Josiah Allen where do you think you'll +go to?" + +"Oh, probable down through Congress Park, and we may walk up as +fur as the Indian Encampment. I feel kinder mauger to-day, and my +corns ache feerful." (His boots wuz that small that they wuz +sights to behold, sights!) "We probably shan't walk fur," says +he. + +I see how 'twuze in a minute. That English girl had asked him to +walk with her, and my pardner had broken a solemn engagement with +Ezra and Druzilla Balch to go a walkin' with her. I see how +'twuz, but I sot in silence and one of the big rockin' chairs, and +didn't say nothin'. + +Finally he says, with a sort of a anxious look onto his foreward: + +"You don't feel bad, do you Samantha? You haint jealous, are +you?" + +"Jealous!" says I, a lookin' him calmly over from head to feet -- +it wuz a witherin' look, and yet pitiful, that took in the hull +body and soul, and weighed 'em in the balances of common sense, +and pity, and justice. It wuz a look that seemed to envelop him +all to one time, and took him all in, his bald head, his vest, and +his boots, and his mind (what he had), and his efforts to be +fashionable, and his trials and tribulations at it, and -- and +everything. I give him that one long look, and then I says: + +"Jealous? No, I haint jealous." + +Then silence rained again about us, and Josiah spoke out (his +conscience was a troublin' him), and he says: + +"You know in fashionable life, Samantha, you have to do things +which seem unkind, and Ezra, though a good, worthy man, can't +understand these things as I do." + +Says I: "Josiah Allen, you'll see the day that you'll be sorry for +your treatment of Druzilla Balch, and Ezra." + +"Oh wall," says he, pullin' up his collar, "I'm bound to be +fashionable. While I can go with the upper 10, it is my duty and +my privilege to go with 'em, and not mingle in the lower classes +like the Balches." + +Says I firmly, "You look out, or some of them 10 will be the death +of you, and you may see the day that you will be glad to leave +'em, the hull 10 of em, and go back to Druzilla and Ezra Balch." + +But what more words might have passed between us, wuz cut short by +the arrival of Ezra and Druzilla in a good big carriage, with Miss +Balch on the back seat, and Ezra acrost from her, and a man up in +front a drivin'. It wuz a good lookin' sight, and I hastened down +the steps, Josiah disappearin' inside jest as quick as he ketched +sight of their heads. + +They asked me anxiously "where Josiah wuz and why he didn't come?" +And I told 'em, "that Josiah had told me that mornin' that he felt +manger, and he had some corns that wuz a achin'." + +So much wuz truth, and I told it, and then moved off the subject, +and they seein' my looks, didn't pursue it any further. They +proposed to go back to their boardin' place, and take in Deacon +Balch, Ezra's brother from Chicago, who wuz stayin' there a few +days to recooperate his energies, and get help for tizick. So +they did. He wuz a widowed man. Yes, he was the widower of +Cornelia Balch who I used to know well, a good lookin' and a good +actin' man. And he seemed to like my appeerance pretty well, +though I am fur from bein' the one that ort to say it. + +And as we rolled on over the broad beautiful road towards Saratoga +Lake, I begun to feel better in my mind. + +The Deacon wuz edifyin' in conversation, and he thought, and said, +"that my mind was the heftiest one that he had ever met, and he +had met hundreds and hundreds of 'em." He meant it, you could see +that, he meant every word he said. And it wuz kind of comfortin' +to hear the Deacon say so, for I respected the Deacon, and I knew +he meant just what he said. + +He said, and believed, though it haint so, but the Deacon believed +it, "that I looked younger than I did the day I wuz married." + +I told him "I didn't feel so young." + +"Wall," he said, "then my looks deceived me, for I looked as +young, if not younger." + +Deacon Balch is a good, kind, Christian man. + +His conversation was very edifyin', and he looked kinder good, and +warm-hearted at me out of his eyes, which wuz blue, some the color +of my Josiah's. But alas! I felt that though some comforted and +edified by his talk, still, my heart was not there, not there in +that double buggy with 2 seats, but wuz afur off with my pardner. +I felt that Josiah Allen wuz a carryin' my heart with him wherever +he wuz a goin'. Curious, haint it? Now you may set and smile, +and talk, and seem to be enjoyin' yourself first-rate, with +agreeable personages all around you, and you do enjoy yourself +with that part of your nater. But with it all, down deep under +the laughs, and the bright words, the comfort you get out of the +answerin' laughs, the gay talk, under it all is the steady +consciousness that the real self is fur away, the heart, the soul +is fur away, held by some creeter whether he be high, or whether +he be low, it don't matter -- there your heart is, a goin' towards +happiness, or a travellin' towards pain as the case may be -- +curious, haint it? + +Wall, Ezra and Druzilla wanted to go to the Sulphur Springs way +beyend Saratoga Lake, and as the Deacon wuz agreeable, and I also, +we sot out for it, though, as we all said, it wuz goin' to be a +pretty long and tegus journey for a hot day. But we went along +the broad, beautiful highway, by the high, handsome gates of the +Racing Park, down, down, by handsome houses and shady woods, and +fields of bright-colored wild flowers on each side of the road, +down to the beautiful lake, acrost it over the long bridge, and +then into the long, cool shadows of the bendin' trees that bend +over the road on each side, while through the green boughs, jest +at our side we could ketch a sight of the blue, peaceful waters, a +lyin' calm and beautiful jest by the side of us -- on, on, through +the long, sheltered pathway, out into the sunshine for a spell, +with peaceful fields a layin' about us, and peaceful cattle a +wanderin' over 'em, and then into the shade agin, till at last we +see a beautiful mountin', with its head held kinder high, crowned +with ferns and hemlocks, and its feet washed by the cool water of +the beautiful lake. + +The shadows of this mountin', tree crowned, lay on the smooth, +placid wave, and a white sail boat wuz a comin' round the side +on't, and floatin' over the green, crystal branches, and golden +shadows. It wuz a fair seen, seen for a moment, and then away we +went into the green shadows of the woods again, round a corner, +and here we wuz, at the Sulphur Springs. + +It wuz a quiet peaceful spot. The house looked pleasant, and so +did the Landlord, and Landlady, and we dismounted and walked +through a long clean hall, and went out onto a back piazza and sot +down. And I thought as I sot there, that I would be glad enough +to set there, for some time. Everything looked so quiet and +serene. The paths leadin' up the hills in different directions, +out into the green woods, looked quiet; the pretty, grassy +backyard leadin' down to the water side looked green and +peaceable, and around all, and beyond all, wuz the glory of the +waters. They lay stretched out beautiful and in heavenly calm, +and the sun, which wuz low in the West, made a gold path acrost +'em, where it seemed as if one could walk over only a little ways, +into Perfect Repose. The Lake somehow looked like a glowin' +pavement, it didn't look like water, but it seemed like broad +fields of azure and palest lavender, and pinky grey, and pearly +white, and every soft and delicate color that water could be +crystalized into. And over all lay the glowin', tender sunset +skies -- it wuz a fair seen. And even as I looked on in a almost +rapped way, the sun come out from behind a soft cloud, and lay on +the water like a pillow of fire jest as I dream that pillow did, +that went ahead of my old 4 fathers. + +The rest on 'em seemed to be more intent on the lemonade with 2 +straws in 'em. I didn't make no fuss. They are nice, clean +folks, I make no doubt. I wouldn't make no fuss and tell on the +hired man -- women of the house have enough to worry 'em anyway. +But he had dropped some straws into our tumblers, every one on +'em, I dare presume to say they had been a fillin' straw ticks. I +jest took mine out in a quiet way, and throwed 'em to one side. +The rest on 'em, I see, and it wuz real good in 'em, drinked +through 'em, as we used to at school. It wuz real good in +Druzilla, and Ezra, and also in the Deacon. It kinder ondeared +the hull on 'em to me. I hope this won't be told of, it orto be +kep -- for he wuz a goodnatured lookin' hired man, black, but not +to blame for that -- and good land! what is a straw? -- anyway +they wuz clean. + +There wuz some tents sot up there in the back yard, lookin' some +as I s'pose our old 4 fathers tents did, in the pleasant summer +times of old. And I asked a bystander a standin' by, whose tents +they wuz, and he said they wuz Free Thinkers havin' a convention. + +And I says, "How free?" + +And he said "they wuz great cases to doubt everything, they +doubted whether they wuz or not, and if they wuz or when, and if +so, why?" + +And he says, "won't you stay to-night over and attend the meetin'?" + +And I says, "What are they goin' to teach tonight?" + +And he says, "The Whyness of the What" + +I says, "I guess that is too deep a subject for me to tackle," and +says I, "Don't they believe anything easier than that?" + +And he says, "They don't believe anything. That is their belief +-- to believe nothin'." + +"Nothin'!" says I. + +"Yes," says he, "Nothin'." And, says he, "to-morrer they are +goin' to prove beyond any question, that there haint any God, nor +anything, and never wuz anything." + +"Be they?" sez I. + +"Yes," says he, "and won't you come and be convinced?" + +I looked off onto the peaceful waters, onto the hills that lay as +the mountains did about Jerusalem, onto the pillow of fire that +seemed to hold in it the flames of that light that had lighted the +old world onto the mornin' of the new day, -- and one star had +come out, and stood tremblin' over the brow of the mountain and I +thought of that star that had riz so long time ago, and had guided +the three wise men, guided 'em jest alike from their three +different homes, entirely unbeknown to each other, guidin' 'em to +the cradle where lay the infant Redeemer of the world, so long +foretold by bard and prophet. I looked out onto the heavenly +glory of the day, and then inside into my heart, that held a faith +jest as bright and undyin' as the light of that star -- and I +says, "No, I guess I won't go and be convinced." + +Wall, we riz up to go most immediately afterwerds, and the Deacon +(he is very smart) observed: + +"How highly tickled and even highlarious the man seemed in talkin' +about there not bein' any future." And he says, "It wuz a good +deal like a man laughin' and clappin' his hands to see his house +burn down" + +And I sez, "it wuz far wurse, for his home wouldn't stand more'n a +100 years or so, and this home he wuz a tryin' to destroy, wuz one +that would last through eternity." "But," says I, "it hain't +built by hands, and I guess their hands hain't strong enough to +tear it down, nor high enough to set fire to it." + +And the Deacon says, "Jest so, Miss Allen, you spoke truthfully, +and eloquent." (The Deacon is very smart.) + +When we got into the buggy to start, the Deacon says, "I would +like to resoom the conversation with you, Josiah Allen's wife, a +goin' back." + +And Druzilla spoke right out and says, "I will set on the front +seat by Ezra." I says, "Oh no, Druzilla, I can hear the Deacon +from where I sot before." + +But the Deacon says, Talkin' loud towards night always offected +his voice onpleasantly, mebby Druzilla and he had better change +seats. + +Again I demurred. And then Druzilla said she must set by Ezra, +she wanted to tell him sumthin' in confidence. + +And so it wuz arraigned, for I felt that I wuz not the one to +come between pardners, no indeed. The road laid peacefuller and +beautifuller than ever, or so it seemed under the sunset glory +that sort o' hung round it. Jest about half way through the woods +we met the English girl, a stridin' along alone, each step more'n +3 feet long, or so it seemed to me. There wuz a look of health, +and happy determination on her forwerd as she strided rapidly by. + +I would have fain questioned her concernin' my pardner, as she +strode by, but before I could call out, or begon to her she wuz +far in the rearwerd, and goin' in a full pressure and in a knot of +several miles an hour. + +Wall, from that minute I felt strange and curious. And though +Druzilla and Ezra was agreeable and the Deacon edifyin', I didn't +seem to feel edified, and the most warm-hearted looks didn't seem +to warm my heart none, it wuz oppressed with gloomy forebodings +of, Where wuz my pardner? They had laid out to set out together. +Had they sot? This question was a goverin' me, and the follerin' +one: If they had sot out together, where wuz my pardner, Josiah +Allen, now? As I thought these feerful thoughts, instinctively I +turned around to see if I could see a trace of his companion in +the distance. Yes, I could ketch a faint glimpse of her as she +wuz mountin' a diclivity, and stood for an instant in sight, but +long before even, she disopeered agin, for her gait wuz +tremendous, and at a rate of a good many knots she wuz a goin', +that I knew. And the fearful thought would rise, Josiah Allen +could not go more than half a knot, if he could that. He wuz a +slow predestinatur any way, and then his corns was feerful, and +never could be told -- and his boots had in 'em the elements of +feerful sufferin'. It wuz all he could do when he had 'em on to +hobble down to the spring, and post-office. Where? where wuz he? +And she a goin' at the rate of so many knots. + +Oh! the agony of them several minutes, while these thoughts wuz +rampagin through my destracted brain. + +Oh! if pardners only knew the agony they bring onto their devoted +companions, by their onguarded and thoughtless acts, and +attentions to other females, gin without proper reseerch and +precautions, it would draw their liniments down into expressions +of shame and remorse. Josiah wouldn't have gone with her if he +had known the number of knots she wuz a goin', no, not one step -- +then why couldn't he have found out the number of them knots -- +why couldn't he? Why can't pardners look ahead and see to where +their gay attentions, their flirtations that they call mild and +innercent, will lead 'em to? Why can't they realize that it haint +only themselves they are injurin', but them that are bound to 'em +by the most sacred ties that folks can be twisted up in? Why +can't they realize that a end must come to it, and it may be a +fearful and a shameful one, and if it is a happiness that stops, +it will leave in the heart when happiness gets out, a emptiness, a +holler place, where like as not onhappiness will get in, and mebby +stay there for some time, gaulin' and heart-breakin' to the +opposite pardner to see it go on? + +If it is indifference, or fashion, or anything of that sort, why +it don't pay none of the time, it don't seem to me it duz, and the +end will be emptier and hollerer then the beginnin'. + +In the case of my pardner it wuz fashion, nothing but the +butterfly of fashion he wuz after, to act in a high-toned, +fashionable manner, like other fashionable men. And jest see the +end on't why he had brought sufferin' of the deepest dye onto his +companion, and what, what hed he brought onto himself -- onto his +feet? + +Oh! the agony of them several moments while them thoughts was a +rackin' at me. The moments swelled out into a half hour, it must +have been a long half hour, before I see far ahead, for the eyes +of love is keen - a form a settin' on the grass by the wayside, +that I recognized as the form of my pardner. As we drew nearer we +all recognized the figure -- but Josiah Allen didn't seem to +notice us. His boots was off, and his stockin's, and even in that +first look I could see the agony that was a rendin' them toes +almost to burstin'. Oh, how sorry I felt for them toes! He was a +restin' in a most dejected and melancholy manner on his hand, as +if it wuz more than sufferin' that ailed him -- he looked a +sufferer from remorse, and regret, and also had the air of one +whom mortification has stricken. + +He never seemed to sense a thing that wuz passin' by him, till the +driver pulled up his horses clost by him, and then he looked up +and see us. And far be it from me to describe the way he looked +in his lowly place on the grass. There wuz a good stun by him on +which he might have sot, but no, he seemed to feel too mean to get +up onto that stun; grass, lowly, unassumin' grass, wuz what seemed +to suit him best, and on it he sot with one of his feet stretched +out in front of him. + +Oh! the pitifulness of that look he gin us, oh! the meakinness of +it. And even, when his eye fell on the Deacon a settin' by my +side, oh! the wild gleam of hatred, and sullen anger that glowed +within his orb, and revenge! He looked at the Deacon, and then at +his boots, and I see the wild thought wuz a enterin' his sole, to +throw that boot at him. But I says out of that buggy the very +first thing the words I have so oft spoke to him in hours of +danger: + +"Joisiah, be calm!" + +His eye fell onto the peaceful grass agin, and he says: "Who +hain't a bein' calm? I should say I wuz calm enough, if that is +what you want." + +But, oh, the sullenness of that love. + +Says Ezra, good man -- he see right through it all in a minute, +and so did Druzilla and the Deacon -- says Ezra, "Get up on the +seat with the driver, Josiah Allen, and drive back with us." + +"No," says Josiah, "I have no occasion, I am a settin' here," +(looking round in perfect agony) "I am a settin' here to admire +the scenery." + +Then I leaned over the side of the buggy, and says I, "Josiah +Allen, do you get in and ride, it will kill you to walk back; put +on your boots if you can, and ride, seein' Ezra is so perlite as +to ask you." + +"Yes, I see he is very perlite, I see you have set amongst very +perlite folks, Samantha," says he, a glarin' at Deacon Balch as if +he would rend him from lim to lim, "But as I said, I have no +occasion to ride, I took off my boots and stockin's merely -- +merely to pass away time. You know at fashionable resorts," says +he, "it is sometimes hard for men to pass away time." + +Says I in low, deep accents, "Do put on your stockin's, and your +boots, if you can get 'em on, which I doubt, but put your +stockin's on this minute, and get in, and ride." + +"Yes," says Ezra, "hurry up and get in, Josiah Allen, it must be +dretful oncomfortabe a settin' down there in the grass." + +"Oh, no!" says Josiah, and he kinder whistled a few bars of no +tune that wuz ever heard on, or ever will be heard on agin, so +wild and meloncholy it wuz -- "I sot down here kind o' careless. +I thought seein' I hadn't much on hand to do at this time o' year, +I thought I would like to look at my feet -- we hain't got a very +big lookin' glass in our room." + +Oh, how incoherent and over-crazed he was a becomin'! Who ever +heard of seein' anybody's feet in a lookin' glass -- of dependin' +on a lookin' glass for a sight on 'em? Oh, how I pitied that man! +and I bent down and says to him in soothin' axents: "Josiah Allen, +to please your pardner you put on your stockin's and get into this +buggy. Take your boots in your hand, Josiah, I know you can't get +'em on, you have walked too far for them corns. Corns that are +trampled on, Josiah Allen, rise up and rends you, or me, or +anybody else who owns 'em or tramples on 'em. It hain't your +fault, nobody blames you. Now get right in." + +"Yes, do," says the Deacon. + +Oh! the look that Josiah Allen gin him. I see the voyolence of +that look, that rested first on the Deacon, and then on that, +boot. + +And agin I says, "Josiah Allen." And agin the thought of his own +feerful acts, and my warnin's came over him, and again +mortification seemed to envelop him like a mantilly, the tabs +goin' down and coverin' his lims -- and agin he didn't throw that +boot. Agin Deacon Balch escaped oninjured, saved by my voice, and +Josiah's inward conscience, inside of him. + +Wall, suffice it to say, that after a long parley, Josiah Allen +wuz a settin' on the high seat with the driver, a holdin' his +boots in his hand, for truly no power on earth could have placed +them boots on Josiah Allen's feet in the condition they then wuz. + +And so he rode on howewards, occasionally a lookin' down on the +Deacon with looks that I hope the recordin' angel didn't +photograph, so dire, and so revengeful, and jealous, and -- and +everything, they wuz. And ever, after ketchin' the look in my +eye, the look in his'n would change to a heart-rendin' one of +remorse, and sorrow, and shame for what he had done. And the +Deacon, wantin' to be dretful perlite to him, would ask him +questions, and I could see the side of Josiah's face, all glarin' +like a hyena at the sound of his voice, and then he would turn +round and ossume a perlite genteel look as he answered him, and +then he glare at me in a mad way every time I spoke to the Deacon, +and then his mad look would change, even to one of shame and +meakinness. And he in his stockin' feet, and a pertendin' that he +didn't put his boots on, because it wuzn't wuth while to put 'em +on agin so near bed-time. And he that sot out that afternoon a +feelin' so haughty, and lookin' down on Ezra and Druzilla, and +bein' brung back by 'em, in that condition -- and bein' goured all +the time by thoughts of the ignominious way his flirtin' had +ended, by her droppin' him by the side of the road, like a weed +she had trampled on too hardly. And a bein' gourded deeper than +all the rest of his agonies, by a senseless jealousy of Deacon +Balch -- and a thinkin' for the first time in his life, what it +would be, if her affections, that had been like a divine beacon to +him all his life, if that flame should ever go out, or ever +flicker in its earthly socket -- oh, those thoughts that he had +seemed to consider in his own mad race for fashion -- oh, how that +sass that had seemed sweet to him as a gander, oh how bitter and +poisonous it wuz to partake of as a goose. + +Oh! the agony of that ride. We went middlin' slow back -- and +before we got to Saratoga the English girl went past us, she had +been to the Sulphur Springs and back agin. She didn't pay no +attention to us, for she wuz alayin' on a plan in her own mind, +for a moonlight pedestrian excursion on foot, that evenin', out to +the old battle ground of Saratoga. + +Josiah never looked to the right hand or the left, as she passed +him, at many, many a knot an hour. And I felt that my pardner's +sufferin from that cause was over, and mine too, but oh! by what +agony wuz it gained. For 3 days and 3 nights he never stood on +any of his feet for a consecutive minute and a half, and I bathed +him with anarky, and bathed his very soul with many a sweet moral +lesson at the same time. And when at last Josiah Allen emerged +from that chamber, he wuz a changed man in his demeanor and +liniment, such is the power of love and womanly devotion. + +He never looked at a woman durin' our hull stay at Saratoga, save +with the eye of a philosopher and a Methodist. + + + +X. + +MISS G. WASHINGTON FLAMM. + +Miss G. Washington Flamm is a very fashionable woman. Thomas +Jefferson carried her through a law-suit, and carried her stiddy +and safe. (She wuz in the right on't, there haint no doubt of +that.) + +She had come to Jonesville for the summer to board, her husband +bein' to home at the time in New York village, down on Wall +street. He had to stay there, so she said. I don't know why, +but s'pose sunthin' wuz the matter with the wall; anyway he +couldn't leave it. And she went round to different places a good +deal for her health. There didn't seem to be much health round +where her husband wuz, so she had to go away after it, go a +huntin' for it, way over to Europe and back ag'in; and away off +to California, and Colorado, and Long Branch, and Newport, and +Saratoga, and into the Country. It made it real bad for Miss +Flamm. + +Now I always found it healthier where Josiah wuz than in any +other place. Difference in folks I s'pose. But they say there +is sights and sights of husbands and wives jest like Miss Flamm. +Can't find a mite of health anywhere near where their families +is, and have to poke off alone after it. It makes it real bad +for 'em. + +But anyway she came to Jonesville for her health. And she hearn +of Thomas Jefferson and employed him. It wuz money that fell +onto her from her father, or that should have fell, that she wuz +a tryin' to git it to fall. And he won the case. It fell. She +wuz rich as a Jew before she got this money, but she acted as +tickled over it as if she wuzn't worth a cent. (Human nater.) +She paid Thomas J. well and she and Maggie and he got to be quite +good friends. + +She is a well-meanin', fat little creeter, what there is of her. +I have seen folks smaller than she is, and then ag'in we seen +them that wuzn't so small. She is middlin' good lookin', not old +by any means, but there is a deep wrinkle plowed right into her +forward, and down each side of her mouth. They are plowed deep. +And I have always wondered to myself who held the plow. + +It wuz'nt age, for she haint old enough. Wuz it Worry? That +will do as good a day's work a plowin' as any creeter I ever see, +and work as stiddy after it gits to doin' day's works in a +female's face. + +Waz it Dissatisfaction and Disappointment? They, too, will plow +deep furrows and a sight of 'em. I don't know what it wuz. +Mebby it wuz her waist and sleeves. Her sleeves wuz so tight +that they kep' her hands lookin' a kinder bloated and swelled all +the time, and must have been dretful painful. And her waist -- +it wuz drawed in so at the bottom, that to tell the livin' truth +it wuzn't much bigger'n a pipe's tail. It beat all to see the +size immegatly above and below, why it looked perfectly +meraculous. She couldn't get her hands up to her head to save +her life; if she felt her head a tottlin' off her shoulders she +couldn't have lifted her hands to have stiddied it, and, of +course, she couldn't get a long breath, or short ones with any +comfort. + +Mebby that worried her, and then ag'in, mebby it wuz dogs. I +know it would wear me out to take such stiddy care on one, day +and night. I never seemed to feel no drawin's to take care of +animals, wash 'em, and bathe 'em, and exercise 'em, etc., etc., +never havin' been in the menagery line and Josiah always keepin' +a boy to take care of the animals when he wuzn't well. Mebby it +wuz dogs. Anyway she took splendid care of hern, jest wore +herself out a doin' for it stiddy day and night and bein' +trampled on, and barked at almost all the time she wuz a bringin' +on it up. + +Yes, she took perfectly wonderful care on't, for a woman in her +health. She never had been able to take any care of her +children, bein' VERY delicate. Never had been well enough to +have any of 'em in the room with her nights, or in the day time +either. They tired her so, and she wuz one of the wimmen who +felt it wuz her DUTY to preserve her health for her family's +sake. Though WHEN they wuz a goin' to get the benefit of her +health I don't know. + +But howsumever she never could take a mite of care of her +children, they wuz brought up on wet nurses, and bottles, etc., +etc., and wuz rather weakly, some on 'em. The nurses, wet and +dry ones both, used to gin 'em things to make 'em sleep, and +kinder yank 'em round and scare 'em nights to keep 'em in the +bed, and neglect 'em a good deal, and keep 'em out in the brilin' +sun when they wanted to see their bows; and for the same reeson +keepin' em out in their little thin dresses in the cold, and +pinch their little arms black and blue if they went to tell any +of their tricks. And they learnt the older ones to be deceitful +and sly and cowerdly. Learnt 'em to use jest the same slang +phrases and low language that they did; tell the same lies, and +so they wuz a spilin' 'em in every way; spilin' their brains with +narcotics, their bodies by neglect and bad usage, and their minds +and morals by evil examples. + +You see some nurses are dretful good. But Miss Flamm's health +bein' so poor and her mind bein' so took up with fashion, dogs, +etc., that she couldn't take the trouble to find out about their +characters and they wuz dretful poor unbeknown to her. She had +dretful bad luck with 'em, and the last one drinked, so I have +been told. + +Yes, it made it dretful bad for Miss Flamm that her health was so +poor, and her fashionable engagements so many and arduous that +she didn't have the time to take a little care of her children +and the dog too. For you could see plain, by the care that she +took of that dog, what a splendid hand she would be with the +children, if she only had the time and health. + +Why, I don't believe there wuz another dog in America, either the +upper or lower continent, that had more lovin', anxus, +intelligent, devoted attention than that dog had, day and night, +from Miss Flamm. She took 2 dog papers, so they say, to get the +latest information on the subject; she compared notes with other +dog wimmen, I don't say it in a runnin' way at all. I mean +wimmen who have gin their hull minds to dog, havin', some on 'em, +renounced husbands, and mothers, and children for dog sake. + +You know there are sich wimmen, and Miss Flamm read up and +studied with constant and absorbed attention all the latest +things on dog. Their habits, their diet, their baths, their +robes, their ribbons, and bells, and collars, their barks -- +nothin' escaped her; she put the best things she learned into +practice, and studied out new ones for herself. She said she had +reduced the subject to a science, and she boasted proudly that +her dog, the last one she had, went ahead of any dog in the +country. And I don't know but it did. I knew it had a good +healthy bark. A loud strong bark that must have made it bad for +her in the night. It always slept with her, for she didn't dast +to trust it out of her sight nights. It had had some spells in +the night, kinder chills, or spuzzums like, and she didn't dast +to be away from it for a minute. + +She wouldn't let the wet nurse tech it, for her youngest child, +little G. Washington Flamm, Jr., wuzn't very healthy, and Miss +Flamm thought that mebby the dog might ketch his weakness if the +nurse handled it right after she had been nursin' the baby. And +then she objected to the nurse, so I hearn, on account of her +bein' wet. She wanted to keep the dog dry. I hearn this; I +don't know as it wuz so. But I hearn these things long enough +before I ever see her. And when I did see her I see that they +didn't tell me no lies about her devotion to the dog, for she +jest worshiped it, that was plain to be seen. + +Wall, she has got a splendid place at Saratoga; a cottage she +calls it. I, myself, should call it a house, for it is big as +our house and Deacon Peddick'ses and Mr. Bobbett'ses all put +together, and I don't know but bigger. + +Wall, she invited Josiah and me to drive with her, and so her dog +and she stopped for us. (I put the dog first, for truly she +seemed to put him forward on every occasion in front of herself, +and so did her high-toned relatives, who wuz with her.) + +Or I s'pose they wuz her relatives for they sot up straight, and +wuz dretful dressed up, and acted awful big-feelin' and never +took no notice of Josiah and me, no more than if we hadn't been +there. But good land! I didn't care for that. What if they +didn't pay any attention to us? But Josiah, on account of his +tryin' to be so fashionable, felt it deeply, and he sez to me +while Miss Flamm wuz a bendin' down over the dog, a talkin' to +him, for truly it wuz tired completely out a barkin' at Josiah, +it had barked at him every single minute sense we had started, +and she wuz a talkin' earnest to it a tryin' to soothe it, and +Josiah whispered to me, "I'll tell you, Samantha, why them +fellers feel above me; it is because I haint dressed up in sech a +dressy fashion. Let me once have on a suit like their'n, white +legs and yellow trimmin's, and big shinin' buttons sot on in +rows, and white gloves, and rosettes in my hat -- why I could +appear in jest as good company as they go in." + +Sez I, "You are too old to be dressed up so gay, Josiah Allen. +There is a time for all things. Gay buttons and rosettes look +well with brown hair and sound teeth, but they ort to gently pass +away when they do. Don't talk any more about it, Josiah, for I +tell you plain, you are too old to dress like them, they are +young men." + +"Wall," he whispered, in deep resolve, "I will have a white +rosette in my hat, Samantha. I will go so far, old or not old. +What a sensation it will create in the Jonesville meetin'-house +to see me come a walkin' proudly in, with a white rosette in my +hat." + +"You are goin' to walk into meetin' with your hat on, are you?" +sez I coldly. + +"Oh, ketch a feller up. You know what I mean. And don't you +think I'll make a show? Won't it create a sensation in +Jonesville?" + +Sez I: "Most probable it would. But you haint a goin' to wear no +bows on your hat at your age, not if I can break it up," sez I. + +He looked almost black at me, and sez he, "Don't go too fur, +Samantha! I'll own you've been a good wife and mother and all +that, but there is a line that you must stop at. You mustn't go +too fur. There is some things in which a man must be footloose, +and that is in the matter of dress. I shall have a white rosette +on my hat, and some big white buttons up and down the back of my +overcoat! That is my aim, Samantha, and I shall reach it if I +walk through goar." + +He uttered them fearful words in a loud fierce whisper which made +the dog bark at him for more'n ten minutes stiddy, at the top of +its voice, and in quick short yelps. + +If it had been her young child that wuz yellin' at a visitor in +that way and ketchin' holt of him, and tearin' at his clothes, +the child would have been consigned to banishment out of the +room, and mebby punishment. But it wuzn't her babe and so it +remained, and it dug its feet down into the satin and laces and +beads of Miss Flamm's dress, and barked to that extent that we +couldn't hear ourselves think. + +And she called it "sweet little angel," and told it it might +"bark its little cunnin' bark." The idee of a angel barkin'; +jest think on't. And we endured it as best we could with shakin' +nerves and achin' earpans. + +It wuz a curius time. The dog harrowin' our nerve, and snappin' +at Josiah anon, if not oftener, and ketchin' holt of him +anywhere, and she a callin' it a angel; and Josiah a lookin' so +voyalent at it, that it seemed almost as if that glance could +stun it. + +It wuz a curius seen. But truly worse wuz to come, for Miss +Flamm in an interval of silence, sez, "We will go first to the +Gizer Spring, and then, afterwards, to the Moon." + +Or, that is what I understand her to say. And though I kep' +still, I wuz determined to keep my eyes out, and if I see her +goin' into anything dangerus, I wuz goin' to reject her overtures +to take us. But thinkses I to myself, "We always said I believed +we should travel to the stars some time, but I little thought it +would be to-day, or that I should go in a buggy." + +Josiah shared my feelin's I could see, for he whispered to me, +"Don't le's go, Samantha, it must be dangerus!" + +But I whispered back, "Le's wait, Josiah, and see. We won't do +nothin' percipitate, but," sez I, "this is a chance that we most +probable never will have ag'in. Don't le's be hasty." We talked +these things in secret, while Miss Flamm wuz a bendin' over, and +conversin' with the dog. For Josiah would ruther have died than +not be s'pozed to be "Oh Fay," as Maggie would say, in everything +fashionable. And it has always been my way to wait and see, and +count 10, or even 20, before speakin'. + +And then Miss Flamin sez sunthin' about what beautiful fried +potatoes you could get there in the moon, and you could always +get them, any time you wanted 'em. + +And the very next time she went to kissin' the dog so voyalently +as not to notice us, my Josiah whispered to me and sez, "Did you +have any idee that wuz what the old man wuz a doin'? I knew he +wuz always a settin' up there in the moon, but it never passed my +mind that he wuz a fryin' potatoes." + +But I sez, "Keep still, Josiah. It is a deep subject, a great +undertakin', and it requires caution and deliberation." + +But he sez,"I haint a goin', Samantha! Nor I haint a goin' to +let you go. It is dangerus." + +But I kinder nudged him, for she had the dog down on her lap, and +was ready to resoom conversation. And about that time we got to +the entrance of the spring, and one of her relatives got down and +opened the carriage door. + +I wondered ag'in that she didn't introduce us. But I didn't care +if she didn't. I felt that I wuz jest as good as they wuz, if +they wuz so haughty. But Josiah wantin' to make himself +agreeable to 'em (he hankers after gettin' into high society), he +took off his hat and bowed low to 'em, before he got out, and sez +he, "I am proud to know you, sir," and tried to shake hands with +him. But the man rejected his overtoors and looked perfectly +wooden, and oninterested. A big-feelin', high-headed creeter. +Josiah Allen is as good as he is any day. And I whispered to him +and sez, "Don't demean yourself by tryin' to force your company +onto them any more." + +"Wall," he whispered back, "I do love to move in high circles." + +Sez I, "Then I shouldn't think you would be so afraid of the +undertakin' ahead on us. If neighborin' with the old man in the +moon, and eatin' supper with him, haint movin' in high circles, +then I don't know what is." + +"But I don't want to go into anything dangerus," sez he. + +But jest then Miss Flamm.spoke to me, and I moved forward by her +side and into a middlin' big room, and in the middle wuz a great +sort of a well like, with the water a bubblin' up into a clear +crystal globe, and a sprayin' up out of it, in a slender misty +sparklin' spray. It wuz a pretty sight. And we drinked a glass +full of it a piece, and then we wandered out of the back +door-way, and went down into the pretty; old-fashioned garden +back of the house. + +Josiah and me and Miss Flamm went. The dog and the two relatives +didn't seem to want to go. The relatives sot up there straight +as two sticks, one of 'em holdin' the dog, and they didn't even +look round at us. + +"Felt too big to go with us," sez Josiah, bitterly, as we went +down the steps. "They won't associate with me." + +"Wall, I wouldn't care if I wuz in your place, Josiah Allen," sez +I, "you are jest as good as they be, and I know it." + +"You couldn't make 'em think so, dumb 'em," sez he. + +I liked the looks of it down there. It seems sometimes as if +Happiness gets kinder homesick, in the big dusty fashionable +places, and so goes back to the wild, green wood, and kinder +wanders off, and loafs round, amongst the pine trees, and cool +sparklin' brooks and wild flowers and long shinin' grasses and +slate stuns, and etc., etc. + +I don't believe she likes it half so well up in the big hotel +gardens or Courtin' yards, as she does down there. You see it +seems as if Happiness would have to be more dressed up, up there, +and girted down, and stiff actin', and on her good behavior, and +afraid of actin' or lookin' onfashionable. But down here by the +side of the quiet little brook, amongst the cool, green grasses, +fur away from diamonds, and satins, and big words, and dogs, and +parasols, and so many, many that are a chasin' of her and a +follerin' of her up, it seemed more as if she loved to get away +from it all, and get where she could take her crown off, lay down +her septer, onhook her corset, and put on a long loose gown, and +lounge round and enjoy herself (metafor). + +We had a happy time there. We went over the little rustick +bridges which would have been spilte in my eyes if they had been +rounded off on the edges, or a mite of paint on 'em. Truly, I +felt that I had seen enough of paint and gildin' to last me +through a long life, and it did seem such a treat to me to see a +board ag'in, jest a plain rough bass-wood board, and some stuns a +lyin' in the road, and some deep tall grass that you had to sort +a wade through. + +Miss Flamm seemed to enjoy it some down there, though she spoke +of the dog, which she had left up with her relatives. + +"3 big-feelin' ones together," I whispered to Josiah. + +And he sez, "Yes, that dog is a big-feelin' little cuss-tomer. +And if I wuz a chipmunk he couldn't bark at me no more than he +duz." + +And I looked severe at Josiah and sez I, "If you don't jine your +syllables closer together you will see trouble, Josiah Allen. +You'll find yourself swearin' before you know it." + +"Oh shaw, sez he, "customer haint a swearin' word; ministers use +it. I've hearn 'em many a time." + +"Yes," sez I, "but they don't draw it out as you did, Josiah +Allen." + +"Oh! wall! Folks can't always speak up pert and quick when they +are off on pleasure exertions and have been barked at as long as +I have been. But now I've got a minutes chance," sez he, "let me +tell you ag'in, don't you make no arraingments to go to the Moon. +It is dangerus, and I won't go myself, nor let you go." + +"Let," sez I to myself. "That is rather of a gaulin' word to me. +Won't let me go." But then I thought ag'in, and thought how love +and tenderness wuz a dictatin' the term, and I thought to myself, +it has a good sound to me, I like the word. I love to hear him +say he won't let me go. + +And truly to me it looked hazerdus. But Miss Flamm seemed ready +to go on, and onwillin'ly I followed on after her footsteps. But +I looked 'round, and said "Good-bye" in my heart, to the fine +trees, and cleer, brown waters of the brook, the grass, and the +wild flowers, and the sweet peace that wuz over all. + +"Good-bye," sez I. "If I don't see you ag'in, you'll find some +other lover that will appreciate you, though I am fur away." + +They didn't answer me back, none on 'em, but I felt that they +understood me. The pines whispered sunthin' to each other, and +the brook put its moist lips up to the pebbly shore and whispered +sunthin' to the grasses that bent down to hear it. I don't know +exactly what it wuz, but it wuz sunthin' friendly I know, for I +felt it speak right through the soft, summer sunshine into my +heart. They couldn't exactly tell what they felt towards me, and +I couldn't exactly tell what I felt towards them, yet we +understood each other; curi'us, haint it? + +Wall, we got into the carriage ag'in, one of her relatives +gettin' down to open the door. They knew what good manners is; +I'll say that for 'em. And Miss Flamm took her dog into her arms +seemin'ly glad to get holt of him ag'in, and kissed it several +times with a deep love and devotedness. She takes good care of +that dog. And what makes it harder for her to handle him is, her +dress is so tight, and her sleeves. I s'pose that is why she +can't breathe any better, and what makes her face and hands red, +and kinder swelled up. She can't get her hands to her head to +save her, and if a assassin should strike her, she couldn't raise +her arm to ward off the blow if he killed her. I s'pose it +worrys her. + +And she has to put her bunnet on jest as quick as she gets her +petticoats on, for she can't lift he arms to save her life after +she gets her corsets on. She owned up to me once that it made +her feel queer to be a walkin' 'round her room with not much on +only her bunnet all trimmed off with high feathers and artificial +flowers. + +But she said she wuz willing to do anythin' necessary, and she +felt that she must have her waist taper, no matter what stood in +the way on't. She loves the looks of a waist that tapers. That +wuz all the fault she found with the Goddus of Liberty +enlightenin' the world in New York Harber. We got to talkin' +about it and she said, "If that Goddus only had corsets on, and +sleeves that wuz skin tight, and her overskirt looped back over a +bustle, it would be perfect!" + +But I told her I liked her looks as well ag'in as she wuz. "Why," +sez I, "How could she lift her torch above her head? And how could +she ever enlighten the world, if she wuz so held down by her corsets +and sleeves that she couldn't wave her torch?" + +She see in a minute that it couldn't be done. She owned up that +she couldn't enlighten the world in that condition, but as fur as +looks went, it would be perfectly beautiful. + +But I don't think so at all. But, as I say, Miss Flamm has a +real hard time on't, all bard down as she is, and takin' all the +care of that dog, day and night. She is jest devoted to it. + +Why jest before we started a little lame girl with a shabby +dress, but a face angel sweet, came to the side of the carriage +to sell some water lilies. Her face looked patient, and wistful, +and she jest held out her flowers silently, and stood with her +bare feet on the wet ground and her pretty eyes lookin' pitifully +into our'n. She wanted to sell 'em awfully, I could see. And I +should have bought the hull of 'em immegitly, my feelin's was +sech, but onfortionably I had left my port-money in my other +pocket, and Josiah said he had left his (mebby he had). But Miss +Flamm would have bought 'em in a minute, I knew, the child's face +looked so mournful and appealin'; she would have bought 'em, but +she wuz so engrossed by the dog; she wuz a holdin' him up in +front of her a admirin' and carressin' of him, so's she never +ketched sight of the lame child. + +No body, not the best natured creeter in the world, can see +through a dog when it is held clost up to the eye, closer than +anything else. + +Wall, we drove down to what they called Vichy Spring and there on +a pretty pond clost to the springhouse, we see a boat with a +bycycle on it, and a boy a ridin' it. The boat wuz rigged out to +look like a swan with its wings a comin' up each side of the boy. +And down on the water, a sailin' along closely and silently wuz +another swan, a shadow swan, a follerin' it right along. It wuz +a fair seen. + +And Josiah sez to me, "He should ride that boat before he left +Saratoga; he said that wuz a undertakin' that a man might be +proud to accomplish." + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen, don't you do anything of the kind." + +"I MUST, Samantha," sez he. And then he got all animated about +fixin' up a boat like it at home. Sez he, "Don't you think it +would be splendid to have one on the canal jest beyond the +orchard?" And sez he, "Mebby, bein' on a farm, it would be more +appropriate to have a big goose sculptured out on it; don't you +think so?" + +Sez I, "Yes, it would be fur more appropriate, and a goose a +ridin' on it. But," sez I, "you will never go into that +undertakin' with my consent, Josiah Allen." + +"Why," sez he, "it would be a beautiful recreation; so uneek." + +But at that minute Miss Flamm gin the order to turn round and +start for the Moon, or that is how I understood her, and I +whispered to Josiah and sez, "She means to go in the buggy, for +the land's sake!" + +And Josiah sez, "Wall, I haint a goin' and you haint. I won't +let you go into anythin' so dangerus. She will probably drive +into a baloon before long, and go up in that way, but jest before +she drives in, you and I will get out, Samantha, if we have to +walk back." + +"I never heard of anybody goin' up in a baloon with two horses +and a buggy," sez I. + +"Wall, new things are a happenin' all the time, Samantha. And I +heard a feller a talkin' about it yesterday. You know they are a +havin' the big political convention here, and he said, (he wuz a +real cute chap too,) he said, 'if the wind wasted in that +convention could be utilized by pipes goin' up out of the ruff of +that buildin' where it is held,' he said, 'it would take a man up +to the moon.' I heerd him say it. And now, who knows but they +have got it all fixed. There wuz dretful windy speeches there +this mornin'. I hearn 'em, and I'll bet that is her idee, of +bein' the first one to try it; she is so fashionable. But I +haint a goin' up in no sech a way." + +"No," sez I. "Nor I nuther. It would be fur from my wishes to +be carried up to the skies on the wind of a political convention. +"Though," sez I reasonably, "I haint a doubt that there wuz +sights, and sights of it used there." + +But jest at this minute Miss Flamm got through talkin' with her +relatives about the road, and settled down to caressin' the dog +ag'in, and Josiah hadn't time to remark any further, only to say, +"Watch me, Samantha, and when I say jump, jump." + +And then we sot still but watchful. And Miss Flamm kissed the +dog several times and pressed him to her heart that throbbed full +of such a boundless love for him. And he lifted his head and +snapped at a fly, and barked at my companion with a renewed energy, +and showed his intellect and delightful qualities in sech remarkable +ways, that filled Miss Flamm's soul deep with a proud joy in him. +And then he went to sleep a layin, down in her lap, a mashin' down +the delicate lace and embroidery and beads. He had been a eating +the beads, I see him gnaw off more than two dozen of 'em, and I +called her attention to it, but she said, "The dear little darlin' +had to have some such recreation." And she let him go on with it, +a mowin' 'em down, as long as he seemed to have a appetite for 'em. +And ag'in she called him "angel." The idee of a angel a gnawin' +off beads and a yelpin'! + +And I asked her, and I couldn't help it. How her baby wuz that +afternoon, and if she ever took it out to drive? + +And she said she didn't really know how it wuz this afternoon; it +wuzn't very well in the mornin'. The nurse had it out somewhere, +she didn't really know just where. And she said, no, she didn't +take it out with her at all -- fur she didn't feel equal to the +care of it, in this hot weather. + +Miss Flamm haint very well I could see that. The care of that +dog is jest a killin' her, a carryin' it round with her all the +time daytimes, and a bein' up with it so much nights. She said +it had a dretful chill the night before, and she had to get up to +warm blankets to put round it; "its nerves wuz so weak," she +said, "and it wuz so sensative that she could not trust it to a +nurse." She has a hard time of it; there haint a doubt of it. + +Wall, it wuz anon, or jest about anon, that Miss Flamm turned to +me and sez, "Moon's is one of the pleasantest places on the lake. +I want you to see it; folks drive out there a sight from +Saratoga." + +And then I looked at Josiah, and Josiah looked at me, and peace +and happiness settled down ag'in onto our hearts. + +Wall, we got there considerably before anon and we found that +Moon's insted of bein' up in another planet wuz a big, long sort +a low buildin' settled right down onto this old earth, with a +immense piazza stretchin' along the side on't. + +And Miss Flamm and Josiah and me disembarked from the carriage +right onto the end of it. But the dog and her relatives stayed +back in the buggy and Josiah spoke bitterly to me ag'in but low, +"They think it would hurt 'em to associate with me a little, dumb +'m; but I am jest as good as they be any day of the week, if I +haint dressed up so fancy." + +"That's so," sez I, whisperin' back to him, "and don't let it +worry you a mite. Don't try to act like Haman," sez I. "You are +havin' lots of the good things of this world, and are goin' to +have some fried potatoes. Don't let them two Mordecais at the +gate, poison all your happiness, or you may get come up with jest +as Haman wuz." + +"I'd love to hang'em," sez he, "as high as Haman's gallows would +let 'em hang." + +"Why," sez I, "they haint injured you in any way. They seem to +eat like perfect gentlemen. A little too exclusive and +aristocratic, mebby, but they haint done nothin' to you." + +"No," sez he, "that is the stick on it, here we be, three men +with a lot of wimmen. And they can't associate with me as man +with man, but set off by themselves too dumb proud to say a word +to me, that is the dumb of it." + +But at this very minute, before I could rebuke him for his +feerful profanity, Miss Flamm motioned to us to come and take a +seat round a little table, and consequently we sot. + +It was a long broad piazza with sights and sights of folks on +it a settin' round little tables like our'n, and all a lookin' +happy, and a laughin', and a talkin' and a drinkin' different +drinks, sech as lemonade, etc., and eatin' fried potatoes and +sech. + +And out in the road by which we had come, wuz sights and sights +of vehicles and conveyances of all kinds from big Tally Ho +coaches with four horses on 'em, down to a little two wheeled +buggy. The road wuz full on'em. + +In front of us, down at the bottom of a steep though beautiful +hill, lay stretched out the clear blue waters of the lake. +Smooth and tranquil it looked in the light of that pleasant +afternoon, and fur off, over the shinin' waves, lay the island. +And white-sailed boats wuz a sailin' slowly by, and the shadow of +their white sails lay down in the water a floatin' on by the side +of the boats, lookin' some like the wings of that white dove that +used to watch over Lake Saratoga. + +And as I looked down on the peaceful seen, the feelin's I had +down in the wild wood, back of the Gizer Spring come back to me. +The waves rolled in softly from fur off, fur off, bringin' a +greetin' to me unbeknown to anybody, unbeknown to me. It come +into my heart unbidden, unsought, from afur, afur. + +Where did it come from that news of lands more beautiful than +any that lay round Mr. Moons'es, beautiful as it wuz. + +Echoes of music sweeter fur than wuz a soundin' from the band +down by the shore, music heard by some finer sense than heard +that, heavenly sweet, heavenly sad, throbbin' through the +remoteness of that country, through the nearness of it, and +fillin' my eyes with tears. Not sad tears, not happy ones, but +tears that come only to them that shet their eyes and behold the +country, and love it. The waves softly lappin' the shore brought +a message to me; my soul hearn it. Who sent it? And where, and +when, and why? + +Not a trace of these emotions could be read on my countenance as +I sot there calmly a eatin' fried potatoes. And they did go +beyond anything I ever see in the line of potatoes, and I thought +I could fry potatoes with any one: Yes, such wuz my feelin's when +I sot out for Mr. Moons'es. But I went back a thinkin' that +potatoes had never been fried by me, sech is the power of a grand +achievment over a inferior one, and so easy is the sails taken +down out of the swellin' barge of egotism. + +No, them potatoes you could carry in your pocket for weeks right +by the side of the finest lace, and the lace would be improved by +the purity of 'em. Fried potatoes in that condition, you could +eat 'em with the lightest silk gloves one and the tips of the +fingers would be improved by 'em; fried potatoes, jest think +on't! + +Wall, we had some lemonade too, and if you'll believe it, -- I +don't s'pose you will but it is the truth, -- there wuz straws in +them glasses too. But you may as well believe it for I tell the +truth at all times, and if I wuz a goin' to lie, I wouldn't lie +about lemons. And then I've always noticed it, that if things +git to happenin' to you, lots of things jest like it will happen. +That made twice in one week or so, that I had found straws in my +tumbler. But then I have had company three days a runnin', rainy +days too sometimes. It haint nothin' to wonder at too much. Any +way it is the truth. + +Wall, we drinked our lemonade, I a quietly takin' out the straws +and droppin' 'em on the floor at my side in a quiet ladylike +manner, and Josiah, a bein' wunk at by me, doin' the same thing. + +And anon, our carriage drove up to the end of the piazza agin and +we sot sail homewards. And the dog barked at Josiah almost every +step of the way back, and when we got to our boardin' place, Miss +Flamm shook hands with us both, and her relatives never took a +mite of notice of us, further than to jump down and open the +carriage door for us as we got out. (They are genteel in their +manners, and Josiah had to admit that they wuz, much as his +feelin's wuz hurt by their haughtiness towards him.) + +And then the dog, and Miss Flamm and Miss Flamm's relatives drove +off. + + + + +XI. + +VISIT TO THE INDIAN ENCAMPMENT. + +It wuz a fair sunshiny mornin' (and it duz seem to me that the +fairness of a Saratoga mornin' seems fairer, and the sunshine +more sunshiny than it duz anywhere else), that Josiah and Ardelia +and me sot sail for the Indian Encampment, which wuz encamped on +a little rise of ground to the eastward of where we wuz. + +Ardelia wuz to come to our boardin' place at halfpast 9 A. M., +forenoon, and we wuz to set out together from there. And +punctual to the very half minute I wuz down on the piazza, with +my mantilly hung over my arm and my umberel in my left hand. +Josiah Allen was on the right side on me. And as Ardelia hadn't +come yet we sot down in a middlin' quiet part of the piazza, and +waited for her. And as we sot there, I sez to Josiah, as I +looked out on the fair pleasant mornin' and the fair pleasant +faces environin' of us round, sez I, "Saratoga is a +good-natured place, haint it, Josiah?" + +And he said (I mistrust his corns ached worse than common, or +sunthin'), he said, he didn't see as it wuz any better-natured +than Jonesville or Loontown. + +And I sez, "Yes it is, Josiah Allen." Sez I, folks are happier +here and more generous, the rich ones seem inclined to help them +that need help to a little comfort and happiness. Jest as I have +always said, Josiah Allen. When folks are happy, they are more +inclined to do good." + +"Oh shaw!" sez Josiah. "That never made no difference with me." + +"What didn't?" sez I. + +"I'm always good," sez he, and he snapped out the words real +snappish, and loud. + +And I sez mildly, "Wall, you needn't bring the ruff down to prove +your goodness." + +And he went on: "I don't see as they are so pesky good here; I +haint seen nothin' of it." + +"Wall," sez I, "when I look over Yaddo, and Hilton Park, it makes +me reconciled, Josiah, to have men get rich; it makes me willin', +Josiah." + +And he sez (cross), He guessed men would get rich whether I wuz +willin' or not; he guessed they wouldn't ask me. + +"Wall, you needn't snap my head off, Josiah Allen," sez I, +"because I love to see folks use their wealth to make pleasant +places for poor folks to wander round in, and forget their own +narrow rocky roads for a spell. It is a noble thing to do, +Josiah Allen; they might have built high walls round 'em if they +had been a mind to, and locked the gates and shet out all the +poor and tired-out ones, But they didn't, and I am highly tickled +at the thought on't, Josiah Allen." + +"Wall, I don't shet up our sugar lot, do I? and I have never +heerd you say one word a praisin' me up for that." + +"That is far different, Josiah Allen," sez I, "there is nothin' +there that can git hurt, only stumps. And you have never laid +out a cent of money on it. And they have spent thousands and +thousands of dollars; and the poorest little child in Saratoga, +if it has beauty-lovin' eyes, can go in and enjoy these places +jest as much as the owners can. And it is a sweet thought to me, +Josiah Allen." + +"Oh wall," sez he, "you have probable said enough about it." + +Now I never care for the last word, some wimmen do, but I never +do. But still I wuzn't goih' to be shet right eff from talkin' +about these places, and I intimated as much to him, and he said, +"Dumb it all! I could talk about 'em all day, if I wanted to, +and about Demorist's Woods too." + +"Wall," sez I, "that is another place, Josiah Allen, that is a +likely well-meanin' spot. Middlin' curius to look at," sez I, +reesonably. "It makes one's head feel sort a strange to see them +criss-cross, curius poles, and floors up in trees, and ladders, +and teterin' boards, and springs, etc., etc., etc. But it is a +well-meanin' spot, Josiah Allen. And it highly tickled me to +think that the little fresh air children wuz brung up there by +the owner of the woods and the poor little creeters, out of their +dingy dirty homes, and filthy air, wandered round for one happy +day in the green woods, in the fresh air and sunshine. That wuz +a likely thing to do, Josiah Allen, and it raises a man more in +my estimation when he's doin' sech things as that, than to set up +in a political high chair, and have a lot of dirty hands clapped, +and beery breaths a cheerin' him on up the political arena." + +"Oh wall," sez Josiah, "the doin's in them woods is enough to +make anybody a dumb lunatick. The crazyest lookin' lot of stuff +I ever set eyes on." + +"Wall, anyway," sez I, "it is a good crazy, if it is, and a +well-meanin' one." + +"Oh, how cross Josiah Allen did look as he heered me say these +words. That man can't bear to hear me say one word a praisin' up +another man, and it grows on him. + +But good land! I am a goin' to speak out my mind as long as my +breath is spared. And I said quite a number of words more about +the deep enjoyment it gin' me to see these broad, pleasure +grounds free for all, rich and poor, bond and free, hombly and +handsome, etc., etc. + +And I spoke about the charitable houses, St. Christiana's home, +and the Home for Old Female Wimmen, and mentioned the fact in +warm tones of how a good, noble-hearted woman had started that +charity in the first on't. + +And Josiah, while I wuz talkin' about these wimmen, became meak +as a lamb. They seemed to quiet him. He looked real mollyfied +by the time Ardelia got there, which wuz anon. And then we sot +sail for the Encampment. + +The Encampment is encamped on one end of a big, square, +wild-lookin' lot right back of one of the biggest tarvens in +Saratoga. It is jest as wild lookin' and appeerin' a field as +there is in the outskirts of Loontown or Jonesville. Why Uncle +Grant Hozzleton's stunny pasture don't look no more sort a broke +up and rural than that duz. I wondered some why they had it +there, and then I thought mebby they kep' it to remember Nater +by, old Nater herself, that runs a pretty small chance to be +thought on in sech a place as this. + +You know there is so much orniment and gildin' and art in the +landscape and folks, that mebby they might forget the great +mother of us all, that is, right in the thickest of the crowd +they might, but they have only to take these few steps and they +will see Ma Nater with her every-day dress on, not fixed up a +mite. And I s'pose she looks good to 'em. + +I myself think that Mother Nater might smooth herself out a +little there with no hurt to herself or her children. I don't +believe in Mas goin' round with their dresses onhooked, and +slip-shod, and their hair all stragglin' out of their combs. (I +say this in metafor. I don't spose Ma Nater ever wore a back +comb or had hooks and eyes on her gown; I say it for oritory, and +would wish to be took in a oritorius way. + +And I don't say right out, that the reeson I have named is the +one why they keep that place a lookin' so like furey, I said, +MEBBY. But I will say this, that it is a wild-lookin' spot, and +hombly. + +Wall, on the upper end on't, standin' up on the top of a sort of +a hill, the Indian Encampment is encamped. There is a hull row +of little stores, and there is swings, and public diversions of +different kinds, krokay grounds, etc., etc., etc. + +Wall, Ardelia stopped at one of these stores kep' by a Injun, not +a West, but a East one, and began to price some wooden bracelets, +and try 'em on, and Josiah and me wandered on. + +And anon, we came to a tent with some good verses of Scripter on +it; good solid Bible it wuz; and so I see it wuz a good creeter +in there anyway. And I asked a bystander a standin' by, Who wuz +in there, and Why, and When? + +And he said it wuz a fortune-teller who would look in the pamm of +my hand, and tell me all my fortune that wuz a passin' by. And I +said I guessed I would go in, for I would love to know how the +children wuz that mornin' and whether the baby had got over her +cold. I hadn't heerd from 'em in over two days. + +Josiah kinder hung 'round outside though he wuz willin' to have +me go in. He jest worships the children and the baby. And he +sees the texts from Job on it, with his own eyes. + +So I bid him a affectionate farewell, and we see the woman a +lookin' out of the tent and witnessin' on't. But I didn't care. +If a pair of companions and a pair of grandparents can't act +affectionate, who can? And the world and the Social Science +meetin' might try in vain to bring up any reeson why they +shouldn't. + +So I went in, with my mind all took up with the grandchildern. +But the first words she sez to me wuz, as she looked close at the +pamm of my hand, "Keep up good spirits, Mom; you will get him in +spite of all opposition." + +"Get who?" sez I, "And what?" + +"A man you want to marry. A small baldheaded man, a amiable-lookin', +slender man. His heart is sot on you. And all the efferts of the +light-complected woman in the blue hat will be in vain to break it +up. Keep up good courage, you will marry him in spite of all," sez +she, porin' over my pamm and studyin' it as if it wuz a jography. + +"For the land's sake!" sez I, bein' fairly stunted with the idees +she promulgated. + +"Yes, you will marry him, and be happy. But you have had a +sickness in the past and your line of happiness has been broken +once or twice." + +Sez I, "I should think as much; let a woman live with a man, the +best man in the world for 20 years, and if her line of happiness +haint broke more than once or twice, why it speaks well for the +line, that is all. It is a good, strong line." + +"Then you have been married?" says she. + +"Yes, Mom," sez I. + +"Oh, I see, down in the corner of your hand is a coffin, you are +a widow, you have seen trouble. But you will be happy. The +mild, bald gentleman will make you happy. He will lead you to +the altar in spite of the light-complected woman with the blue +bat on." + +Ardelia Tutt had on a blue hat, the idee! But I let her go on. +Thinkses I, "I have paid my money and now it stands me in hand to +get the worth on't." So she comferted me up with the hope of +gettin' my Josiah for quite a spell. + +Gettin' my pardner! Gettin' the father of my childern, and the +grandparent of my grandchildren! Jest think on't, will you? + +But then she branched off and told me things that wuz truly +wonderful. Where and how she got 'em wuz and is a mistery to me. +True things, and strange. + +Why it seemed same as if them tall pines, that wuz a whisperin' +together over the Encampment wuz a peerin' over into my past, and +a whisperin' it down to her. Or, in some way or other, the truth +wuz a bein' filtered down to her comprehension through some +avenue beyond our sense or sight. + +It is a curious thing, so I think, and so Josiah thinks. We +talked it over after I came out, and we wuz a wanderin' on about +the Encampment. I told him some of the wonderful things she had +told me and he didn't believe it. "For," sez he, "I'll be hanged +if I can understand and I won't believe anything that I can't +understand!" + +And I pointed with the top of my umberel at a weed growin' by the +side of the road, and sez I, "When you tell me jest how that weed +draws out of the back ground jest the ingredients she needs to +make her blue foretop, and her green gown, then I'll tell you all +about this secret that Nater holds back from us a spell, but will +reveel to us when the time comes." + +"Oh shave!" sez Josiah, "I guess I know all about a jimson weed. +Why they groin; that is all there is about them. They grow, dumb +'em. I guess if you'd broke your back as many times as I have a +pullin' 'em up, yon would know all about' em. Dumb their dumb +picters," sez he, a scowlin' at 'em. + +It wuz the same kind of weed that growed in our onion beds. I +recognized it. Them and white daisies, our garden wuz overrun by +'em both. + +But I sez, "Can you tell how the little seed of this weed goes +down into the earth and selects jest what she wants out of the +great storehouse below? She never comes out in a pink head-dress +or a yellow gown. No, she always selects what will make the blue. +It shows that it has life, intelligence, or else it couldn't think, +way down under the ground, and grope in the dark, but always +gropin' jest right, always a thinkin' the right thing, never, never +in the hundreds and thousands of years makin' a mistake. Why, you +couldn't do it, Josiah Allen, nor I couldn't. + +"And we set and see these silent mysteries a goin' on right at +our door-step day by day, and year by year, and think nothin' of +it, because it is so common. But if anything else, some new law, +some new wonder we don't understand comes in our way, we are +ready to reject it and say it is a lie. But you know, Josiah +Allen," sez I, jest ready to go on eloquent - + +But I wuz interrupted jest here by my companion hollerin' up in a +loud voice to a boy, "Here! you stop that, you young scamp! Don't +you let me see you a doin' that agin!" + +Sez I, "What is it, Josiah Allen?" + +"Why look at them young imps, a throwin' sticks at that feeble +old woman, over there." + +I looked, and my own heart wuz rousted up with indignation. I +stood where I couldn't see her face, but I see she wuz old, +feeble, and bent, a withered poor old creeter, and they had +marked up over her, her name, Aunt Sally. + +I too wuz burnin' indignant to see a lot of young creeters a +throwin' sticks at her, and I cried out loud, "Do you let Sarah +be." + +They turned round and laughed in our faces, and I went on: "I'd +be ashamed of myself if I wuz in your places to be a throwin' +sticks at that feeble old woman. Why don't you spend your +strengths a tryin' to do sunthin' for her? Git her a home, and +sunthin' to eat, and a better dress. Before I'd do what you are +a doin' now, I'd growvel in the dust. Why, if you wuz my boys +I'd give you as good a spankin' as you ever had." + +But they jest laughed at us, the impudent Greeters. And one of +the boys at that minute took up a stick and threw it, and hit +Sarah right on her poor old head. + +Sez Josiah, "Don't you hit Sarah agin." + +Sez the boys, "We will," and two of 'em hit her at one time. And +one of 'em knocked the pipe right out of her mouth. She wuz a +smokin', poor old creeter. I s'pose that wuz all the comfort she +took. But did them little imps care? They knocked her as if +they hated the sight of her. And my Josiah (I wuz proud of that +man) jest advanced onto 'em, and took 'em one in each hand, and +gin 'em sech a shakin', that I most expected to see their bones +drop out, and sez he between each shake, "Will you let Sarah +alone now?" + +I wuz proud of my Josiah, but fearful of the effect of so much +voyalence onto his constitution, and also onto the boys' frames. +And I advanced onto the seen of carnage and besought him to be +calm. Sez he, "I won't be calm!" sez he, "I haint the man, +Samantha, to stand by and see one of your sect throwed at, as I +have seen Sarah throwed at, without avengin' of it." + +And agin he shook them boys with a vehemence. The pennies and +marbles in their pockets rattled and their bones seemed ready to +part asunder. I wuz proud of that noble man, my pardner. But +still I knew that if their bones was shattered my pardner would +be avenged upon by incensed parents. And I sez, "I'd let 'em go +now, Josiah. I don't believe they'll ever harm Sarah agin." Sez +I, "Boys, you won't, will you ever strike a poor feeble old woman +agin?." Sez I, "promise me, boys, not to hurt Sarah." + +I don't know what the effect of my words would have been, but a +man came up just then and explained to me, that Aunt Sally wuz a +image that they throwed at for one cent apiece to see if they +could break her pipe. + +I see how it wuz, and cooled right down, and so did Josiah. And +he gin the boys five cents apiece, and quiet rained down on the +Encampment. + +But I sez to the man, "I don't like the idee of havin' my sect +throwed at from day to day, and week to week." Sez I, "Why didn't +you have a man fixed up to throw at, why didn't you have a Uncle +Sam?" Sez I, "I don't over and above like it; it seems to be a +sort of a slight onto my sect." + +Sez the man winkin' kind a sly at Josiah, "It won't do to make +fun of men, men have the power in their hands and would resent it +mebby. Uncle Sam can't be used jest like Aunt Sally." + +Sez I, "That haint the right spirit. There haint nothin' over +and above noble in that, and manly." + +I wuz kinder rousted up about it, and so wuz Josiah. And that is +I s'pose the reasun of his bein' so voyalent, at the next place +of recreation we halted at Josiah see the picture of the mermaid; +that beautiful female, a, settin' on the rock and combin' her +long golden hair. And he proposed that we should go in and see +it. + +Sez I, "It costs ten cents apiece, Josiah Allen. Think of the +cost before it is too late." Sez I, "Your expenditure of money +today has been unusial." Sez I, "The sum of ten cents has jest +been raised by you for noble principles, and I honer you for it. +But still the money has gone." Sez I, "Do you feel able to incur +the entire expense?" + +Sez he, "All my life, Samantha, I have jest hankered after seein' +a mermaid. Them beautiful creeters, a settin' and combin' their +long golden tresses. I feel that I must see it. I fairly long +to see one of them beautiful, lovely bein's before I die." + +"Wall," sez I, "if you feel like that, Josiah Allen, it is not +fur from me to balk you in your search for beauty. I too admire +loveliness, Josiah Allen, and seek after it." And sez I, "I will +faithfully follow at your side, and together we will bask in the +rays of beauty, together will we be lifted up and inspired by the +immortal spirit of loveliness." + +So payin' our 30 cents we advanced up the steps, I expectin' soon +to be made happy, and Josiah held up by the expectation of soon +havin' his eyes blest by that vision of enchantin' beauty, he had +so long dremp of. + +He advanced onto the pen first and before I even glanced down +into the deep where as I s'posed she set on a rock a combin' out +her long golden hair, a singin' her lurin' and enchanted song, to +distant mariners she had known, and to the one who wuz a showin' +of her off, before I had time to even glance at her, the maid, I +was dumbfounded and stood aghast, at the mighty change that came +over my pardner's linement. + +He towered up in grandeur and in wrath before me. He seemed +almost like a offended male fowl when ravenin' hawks are angerin' +of it beyond its strength to endure. I don't like that metafor; +I don't love to compare my pardner to any fowl, wild or tame; but +my frenzied haste to describe the fearful seen must be my excuse, +and also my agitation in recallin' of it. + +He towered up, he fluttered so to speak majestically, and he says +in loud wild axents that must have struck terror to the soul of +that mariner, "Where is the hair-comb?" + +And then he shook his fist in the face of that mariner, and cries +out once agin, "Where is them long golden tresses? Bring 'em on +this instant! Fetch on that hair-comb, in a minute's time, or +I'll prosecute you, and sue you, and take the law to you - !" + +The mariner quailed before him and sez I, "My dear pardner, be +calm! Be calm!" + +"I won't be calm!" + +Sez I mildly, but firmly, "You must, Josiah Allen; you must! or +you will break open your own chest. You must be calm." + +"And I tell you I won't be calm. And I tell you," says he, a +turnin' to that destracted mariner agin "I tell you to bring on +that comb and that long hair, this instant. Do you s'pose I'm +goin' to pay out my money to see that rack-a-bone that I wouldn't +have a layin' out in my barn-yard for fear of scerin' the dumb +scere-crows out in the lot. Do you s'pose I'm goin' to pay out +my money for seein' that dried-up mummy of the hombliest thing +ever made on earth, the dumbdest, hombliest; with 2 or 3 horse +hairs pasted onto its yellow old shell! Do you spose I'm goin' +to be cheated by seein' that, into thinkin' it is a beautiful +creeter a playin' and combin' her hair? Bring on that beautiful +creeter a combin' out her long, golden hair this instant, and +bring out the comb and I'll give you five minutes to do it in." + +He wuz hoorse with emotion, and he wuz pale round his lips as +anything and leis eyes under his forward looked glassy. I wuz +fearful of the result. + +Thinkses I, I will look and see what has wrecked my pardner's +happiness and almost reasen. I looked in and I see plain that +his agitation was nothin' to be wondered at. It did truly seem +to be the hombliest, frightfulest lookin' little thing that wuz +ever made by a benignant Providence or a taxy-dermis. I couldn't +tell which made it. I see it all, but I see also, so firm, sot +is my reasun onto its high throne on my heart, I see that to +preserve my pardner's sanity, I must control my reasun at the +sight that had tottered my pardner's. + +I turned to him, and tried to calm the seethin' waters, but he +loudly called for the comb, and for the tresses, and the lookin' +glass. And, askin' in a wild' sarcastic way where the song wuz +that she sung to mariners? And hollerin' for him to bring on +that rock at that minute, and them mariners, and ordered him to +set her to singin'. + +The idee! of that little skeletin with her skinny lips drawed +back from her shinin' fish teeth, a singin'. The idee on't! + +But truly, he wuz destracted and knew not what he did. The +mariner in charge looked destracted. And the bystanders a +standin' by wuz amazed, and horrowfied by the spectacle of his +actin' and behavin'. And I knew not how I should termonate the +seen, and withdraw him away from where he wuz. + +But in my destraction and agony of sole, I bethought me of one +meens of quietin' him and as it were terrifyin' him into silence +and be the meens of gettin' on him to leave the seen. I begoned +to Ardelia to come forward and I sez in a whisper to her, "Take +out your pencil and a piece of paper and stand up in front of him +and go to writin' some of your poetry," + +And then I sez agin in tender agents, "Be calm, Josiah." + +"And I tell you that I won't be calm! And I tell you," a shakin' +his fist at that pale mariner, "I tell you to bring out -- " + +At that very minute he turned his eyes onto Ardelia, who stood +with a kind of a fur-away look in her eyes in front of him with +the paper in her hand, and sez he to me, "What is she doin'?" + +"She is composin' some poetry onto you, Josiah Allen," sez I, in +tremblin' axents; for I felt that if that skeme failed, I wuz +undone, for I knew I had no ingredients there to get him a extra +good meal. No, I felt that my tried and true weepon wuz fur +away, and this wuz my last hope. + +But as I thought these thoughts with almost a heatlightnin' +rapidety, I see a change in his liniment. It did not look so +thick and dark; it began to look more natural and clear. + +And sez he in the same old way I have heerd him say it so many +times, "Dumb it all! What duz she want to write poetry on me +for? It is time to go home." And so sayin', he almost tore us +from the seen. + +I gin Ardelia that night 2 yards of lute-string ribbon, a light +pink, and didn't begrech it. But I have never dast, not in his +most placid and serene moments - I have never dast, to say the +word "Mermaid' to him. + +Truly there is something that the boldest female pardner dassent +do. Mermaids is one of the things I don' dast to bring up. No! +no, fur be it from me to say "Mermaid" to Josiah Allen. + + + + +XII. + +A DRIVE TO SARATOGA LAKE. + + +Josiah and me took a short drive this afternoon, he hirin' a +buggy for the occasion. He called it "goin' in his own conveniance," +and I didn't say nothin' aginst his callin' it so. I didn't break +it up for this reasun, thinkses I it is a conveniance for us to +ride in it, for us 2 tried and true souls to get off for a minute +by ourselves. + +Wall, Josiah wuz dretful good behaved this afternoon. He helped +me in a good deal politer than usual and tucked the bright +lap-robe almost tenderly round my form. + +Men do have sech spells. They are dretful good actin' at times. +Why they act better and more subdueder and mellerer at sometimes +than at others, is a deep subject which we mortals cannot as yet +fully understand. Also visey versey, their cross, up headeder +times, over bearin' and actin'. It is a deep subject and one +freighted with a great deal of freight. + +But Josiah's goodness on this afternoon almost reached the +Scripteral and he sez, when we first sot out, and I see that the +horse's head wuz turned towards the Lake. Sez he, "I guess we'll +go to the Lake, but where do you want to go, Samantha? I will go +anywhere you want to go." + +And he still drove almost recklessly on lakewards. And sez he, +"We had better go straight on, but say the word, and you can go +jest where you want to." And he urged the horse on to still +greater speed. And he sez agin, "Do you want to go any +particular place, Samantha?" + +"Yes," sez I, "I had jest as leves go there as not." + +"Wall, I knew there would be where you would want to go." And he +drove on at a good jog. But no better jog than we had been a +goin' on. + +Wall the weather wuz delightful. It wuz soft and balmy. And my +feelin's towered my pardner (owin' to his linement) wuz soft and +balmy as the air. And so we moved onwards, past the home of one +who wuz true to his country, when all round him wuz false, who +governed his state wisely and well, held the lines firm, when she +wuz balky, and would have been glad to take the lines in her +teeth and run away onto ruin; past the big grand house of him who +carried a piece of our American justice way off into Egypt and +carried it firm and square too right there in the dark. I s'pose +it is dark. I have always hearn about its bein' as dark as +Egypt. Wall, anyway he is a good lookin' man. They both on 'em +are and Josiah admitted it - after some words. + +Wall anon, or perhaps a little after, we came to where we could +see the face of Beautiful Saratoga Lake, layin' a smilin' up into +the skies. A little white cloud wuz a restin' up on the top of +the tree-covered mountain that riz up on one side of the lake, +and I felt that it might be the shadow form of the sacred dove +Saderrosseros a broodin' down over the waters she loved. + +That she loved still, though another race wuz a bathin' their +weary forwards in the tide. And I wondered as I looked down on +it, whether the great heart of the water wuz constant; if it ever +heaved up into deep sithes a thinkin' of the one who had passed +away, of them who once rested lightly on her bosem, bathed their +dark forwards and read the meanin' of the heavens, in the moon +and stars reflected there. + +I don't know as she remembered 'em, and Josiah don't. But I know +as we stood there, a lookin' down on her, the lake seemed to give +a sort of a sithe and a shiver kind a run over her, not a cold +shiver exactly, but a sort of a shinin', glorified shiver. I see +it a comin' from way out on the lake and it swept and sort a +shivered on clean to the shore and melted away there at our feet. +Mebby it wuz a sort o' sithe, and mebby agin it wuzn't. + +I guess it felt that it wuz all right, that a fairer race had +brought fairer customs and habits of thoughts, and the change wuz +not a bad one. I guess she looked forward to the time when a +still grander race should look down into her shinin' face, a race +of free men, and free wimmen; sons and daughters of God, who +should hold their birthright so grandly and nobly that they will +look back upon the people of to-day, as we look back upon the +dark sons and daughters of the forest, in pity and dolor. + +I guess she thought it wuz all right. Any way she acted as if +she did. She looked real sort o' serene and calm as we left her, +and sort o' prophetic too, and glowin'. + +Wall, we went by a long first rate lookin' sort of a tarven, I +guess. It wuz a kind of a dark red color, and dretfully flowered +off in wood - red wood. And there we see standin' near the +house, a great big round sort of a buildin', and my Josiah sez, + +"There! that is a buildin' I like the looks on. That is a barn I +like; built perfectly round. That is sunthin' uneek. I'll have +a barn like that if I live. I fairly love that barn." And he +stopped the horse stun still to look at it. + +And I sez in sort o' cool tones, not entirely cold, but coolish: +"What under the sun do you want with a round barn? And you don't +need another one." + +"Wall, I don't exactly need it, Samantha, but it would be a +comfert to me to own one. I should dearly love a round barn." + +And he went on pensively, - "I wonder how much it would cost. I +wouldn't have it quite so big as this is. I'd have it for a +horse barn, Samantha. It would look so fashionable, and genteel. +Think what it would be, Samantha, to keep our old mair in a round +barn, why the mair would renew her age." + +"She wouldn't pay no attention to it," sez I. "She knows too +much." And I added in cooler, more dignifieder tones, but dretful +meanin' ones, "The old mair, Josiah Allen, don't run after every +new fancy she hears on. She don't try to be fashionable, and she +haint high-headed, except," sez I, reasenably, "when you check her +up too much." + +"Wall," sez he, "I am bound to make some enquiries. Hello!" says +he to a bystander a comin' by. "Have you any idee what such a +barn as that would cost? A little smaller one, I don't need so +big a one. How many feet of lumber do you s'pose it would take +for it? I ask you," sez he, "as between man and man." + +I nudged him there, for as I have said, I didn't believe then, +and I don't believe now, that he or any other man ever knew or +mistrusted what they meant by that term "as between man and man." +I think it sounds kind o' flat, and I always oppose Josiah's +usin' it; he loves it. + +Wall, the man broke out a' laughin' and sez he, "That haint a +barn, that is a tree." + +"A tree!" sez I, a sort o' cranin' my neck forward in deep amaze. +And what exclamation Josiah Allen made, I will not be coaxed into +revealin'; no, it is better not. + +But suffice it to say that after a long explanation my companion +at last gin in that the man wuz a tellin' the truth, and it wuz +the lower part of a tree-trunk, that growed once near the Yo Semity +valley of California. Good land! good land! + +Josiah drove on quick after the man explained it, he felt +meachin', but I didn't notice his linement so much, I wuz so deep +in thought, and a wonderin' about it; a wonderin' how the old +tree felt with her feet a restin' here on strange soil - her +withered, dry old feet a standin' here, as if jest ready to walk +away restless like and feverish, a wantin' to get back by the +rushin' river that used to bathe them feet in the spring overflow +of the pure cold mountain water. It seemed to me she felt she +was a alien, as if she missed her strong sturdy grand old body, +her lofty head that used to peer up over the mountains, and as if +some day she wuz a goin' to set off a walkin' back, a tryin' to +find 'em. + +I thought of how it had towered up, how the sun had kissed its +branches, how the birds had sung and built their nests against +her green heart, hovered in her great, outstretched arms. The +birds of a century, the birds of a thousand years. How the +storms had beat upon her; the first autumn rains of a thousand +years, the first snow-flakes that had wavered down in a slantin' +line and touched the tips of her outstretched fingers, and then +had drifted about her till her heart wuz almost frozen and she +would clap her cold hands together to warm 'em, and wail out a +dretful moanin' sound of desolation, and pain. + +But the first warm rain drops of Spring would come, the sunshine +warmed her, she swung out her grand arms in triumph agin, and +joined the majestic psalm of victory and rejoicing with all her +grand sisterhood of psalmists. The stars looked down on her, the +sun lit her lofty forward, the suns and stars of a thousand +years. Strange animals, that mebby we don't know anything about +now, roamed about her feet, birds of a different plumage and song +sung to her (mebby). + +Strange faces of men and women looked up to her. What faces had +looked up to her in sorrow and in joy? I'd gin a good deal to +know. I'd have loved to see them strange faces touched with +strange pains and hopes. Tribulations and joys of a thousand +years ago. What sort of tribulations wuz they, and what sort of +joys? Sunthin' human, sunthin' that we hold in common, no doubt. +The same pain that pained Eve as she walked down out of Eden, the +same joy that Adam enjoyed while they and the garden wuz +prosperus, wuz in their faces most probable whether their +forwards wuz pinted or broad, their faces black, copper colored +or white. + +And the changes, the changes of a thousand years, all these the +old tree had seen, and I respected her dry dusty old feet and wuz +sorry for 'em. And I reveryed on the subject more'n half the way +home, and couldn't help it. Anyway my revery lasted till jest +before we got to the big gate of the Race Course. + +And right there, right in front of them big ornamental doors, we +see Miss G. Washington Flamm, with about a thousand other carriages +and wagons and Tally ho's and etcetry, and etcetry. Josiah thinks +there wuz a million teams, but I don't. I am mejum; there wuzn't +probable over a thousand right there in the road. + +Miss Flamm recognized us and asked us if we didn't want to go in. +Wall, Josiah wuz agreeable to the idee and said so. And then she +said sunthin' to the man that tended to the gate, probably +sunthin' in our praise, and handed him sunthin', it might have +been a ten cent piece, for all I know. + +But anyway he wuz dretful polite to us, and let us through. And +my land! if it wuzn't a sight to behold! Of all the big roomy +places I ever see all filled with vehicles of all shapes and +sizes and folks on foot and big high platforms, all filled with +men and wimmen and children! And Josiah sez to me, "I thought +the hull dumb world wuz there outside in the road, and here there +is ten times as many in here." + +And I sez, "Yes, Josiah, be careful and not lose me, for I feel +like a needle in a hay mow." + +He looked down on me and sort a smiled. I s'pose it wuz because +I compared myself to a needle, and he sez, "A cambric needle, or +a darnin' needle?" + +And I sez, "I wouldn't laugh in such a time as this, Josiah Allen." +Sez I, "Do jest look over there on the race course." + +And it wuz a thrillin' seen. It wuz a place big enough for all +the horses of our land to run 'round in and from Phario's horses +down to them of the present time. And beautiful broad smooth +roads cut in the green velvet of the grass, and horses goin' +'round jest like lightnin', with little light buggys hitched to +'em, some like the quiver on sheet lightnin' (only different +shape) and men a drivin' 'em. + +And then there wuz a broad beautiful race course with little +clusters of trees and bushes, every little while right in the +road, and if you'll believe it, I don't s'pose you will, but it +is the livin' truth, when them horses, goin' jest like a flash of +light, with little boys all dressed in gay colors a ridin' 'em -- +when them horses came to them trees instid of goin' 'round 'em, +or pushin' in between 'em, or goin' back agin, they jumped right +over 'em. I don't spose this will be believed by lots of folks +in Jonesville and Loontown, but it is the truth, for I see it +with both my eyes. Josiah riz right up in the buggy and cheered +jest as the rest of 'em did, entirely unbeknown to himself, so he +said, to see it a goin' on. + +Why he got nearly rampant with excitement. And so did I, though +I wouldn't want it known by Tirzah Ann's husband's folks and +others in Jonesville. They call it "steeple chasin'" so if they +should hear on't, it wouldn't sound so very wicked any way. I +should probable tell 'em if they said too much, "That it wuz a +pity if folks couldn't get interested in a steeple and chase it +up." But between you and me I didn't see no sign of a steeple, +nor meetin' house nor nuthin'. I s'pose they gin it that name to +make it seem more righter to perfessors. I know it wuz a great +comfort to me. (But I don't think they chased a steeple, and +Josiah don't, for we think we should have seen it if they had.) + +Wall, as I say, we wuz both dretfully interested, excited, and +wrought up, I s'pose I ort to say, when a chap accosted me and +says to me sunthin' about buyin' a pool. And I shook my head and +sez, "No, I don't want to buy no pool." + +But he kep' on a talkin' and a urgin', and sez, "Won't you buy a +French pool, mom, you can make lots of money out of it." + +"A pool," sez I in dignified axents, and some stern, for I wuz +weary with his importunities. "What do I want a pool for? Don't +you s'pose there's any pools in Jonesville, and I never thought +nothin' on 'em, I always preferred runnin' water. But if I wuz a +goin' to buy one, what under the sun do you s'pose I would buy +one way off here for, hundreds of miles from Jonesville?" + +"I might possibly," sez I, not wantin' to hurt his feelin's and +tryin' to think of some use I could put it tot " might if you had +a good small American pool, that wuz a sellin' cheap; and I could +have it set right in our back yard, clost to the horse barn, why +I might possibly try to make a dicker with you for it. I might +use it for raisin' ducks and geese, though I'd rather have a +runnin' stream then. But how under the sun you think I could +take a pool home on a tower, how I could pack it, or transport +it, or drive it home is a mystery to me." + +Again he sez mechinecally, "Lots of wimmen do get 'em." + +"Wall, some wimmen," sez I mildly, for I see he wuz a lookin' at +me perfect dumbfoundered. I see I wuz fairly stuntin' him with +my eloquence. "Some wimmen will buy anything if it has a French +name to it. But I prefer my own country, land or water. And +some wimmen," sez I, "will buy anything if they can get it cheap, +things they don't need, and would be better off without, from a +eliphant down to a magnificent nothin' to call husband. They'll +buy any worthless and troublesome thing jest to get 'em to goin'. +Now such wimmen would jest jump at that pool. But that haint my +way. No, I don't want to purchase your pool." + +Sez he, "You are mistaken, mom!" + +"No I haint," sez I firmly and with decesion. "No I haint. I +don't need no pool. It wouldn't do me no good to keep it on my +hands, and I haint no notion of settin' up in the pool or pond +business, at my age." + +"And then," sez I reasonably, "the canal runs jest down below our +orchard, and if we run short, we could get all the water we +wanted from there. And we have got two good cisterns and a well +on the place." + +Sez he, "What I mean is, bettin' on a horse. Do you want to bet +on which horse will go the fastest, the black one or the bay one?" + +"No," sez I, "I don't want to bet." + +But he kep' on a urgin' me, and thinkin' I had disappinted him in +sellin' a pool, or rather pond, I thought it wouldn't hurt me to +kinder gin in to him in this, so I sez mildly, "Bettin' is sunthin' +I don't believe in, but seein' I have disappinted you in sellin' +your water power, I don't know as it would be wicked to humor you +in this and say it to please you. You say the bay horse is the +best, so I'll say for jest this once - There! I'll bet the bay +one will go the best." + +"Where is your money?" sez he. "It is five dollars for a bet. +You pay five dollars and you have a chance to get back mebby 100." + +I riz right up in feerful dignity, and the buggy and I sez that +one feerful word to him, "Gamblin'!" He sort a quailed. But sez +he, "you had better take a five-dollar chance on the bay horse." + +"No," sez I, with a freezin' coldness, that must have made his +ears fairly tingle it wuz so cold, "no I shall not gamble, neither +on foot nor on horseback." + +Then I sot down and I sez in the same lofty tones to Josiah +Allen, "Drive on, Josiah, instantly and to once." + +He too had heerd the fearful word and his princeples too wuz +rousted up. He driv right on rapidly, out of the gate and into +the highway. But as he druv on fast and almost furius I heerd +him murmur words to himself, that accounted for his eager looks +while the man wuz dickerin' about the pool. He sez, "It is dumb +hard work pumpin' water for so many head of cattle." He thought +a pool would come handy, so I see. But it wuz all done and I +would have done the same thing if it was to do over agin, so I +didn't say nuthin', but kep' a serene silence, and let him drive +along in quiet; and anon, I see the turbelence of his feelin's +subsided in a measure. + +It wuz a gettin' along towards sundown and the air wuz a growin' +cool and balmy, as if it wuz a blowin' over some balm flowers, +and we begun to feel quite well in our minds, though the crowd +in the road wuz too big for comfert. The crowd of carriages and +horses, and vehicles of all kinds, seemed to go in two big full +rows or streams, one a goin' down on one side of the road, and +the other a goin' up on the other. So the 2 tides swept past +each other constantly -- but the bubbles on the tide wuzn't foam +but feathers, and bows, and laces, and parasols, and buttons, and +diamonds, and etcetry, etcetry, etcetry. + +And all of a sudden my Josiah jest turned into a big gate that +wuz a standin' wide open and we drove into a beautiful quiet road +that went a windin' in under the shadows of the tall grand old +trees. He did it without askin' my advice or sayin' a word to +me. But I wuzn't sorry. Fur it wuz beautiful in there. It +seemed as if we had left small cares and vexations and worryments +out there in the road and dust, and took in with us only repose +and calmness, and peace, and they wuz a journeyin' along with us +on the smooth road under the great trees, a bendin' down on each +side on us. And pretty soon we came to a beautiful piece of +water crossed by a rustick bridge, and all surrounded by green +trees on every side. Then up on the broad road agin, sweepin' +round a curve where we could see a little ways off a great mansion +with a wall built high round it as if to shet in the repose and +sweet home-life and shet out intrusion, sort a protect it from the +too curius glances of a curius generation. Some as I hold my hand +up before my face to keep off the too-scorchin' rays of the sun, +when I am a lookin' down the western road for my Josiah. + +It wuz a good lookin' spot as I ever want to see, sheltered, +quiet and lovely. But we left it behind us as we rode onwards, +till we came out along another broad piece of the water, and we +rode along by the side of it for some time. + +Beautiful water with the trees growin' up on every side of it, +and their shadows reflected so clearly in the shinin' surface, +that they seemed to be trees a growin' downwards, tall grand +trees, wavin' branches, goin' down into the water and livin' agin +in another world, -- a more beautiful one. + +The sun wuz a gettin' low and piles of clouds wuz in the west and +all their light wuz reflected in the calm water. And the beautiful +soft shadows rested there on that rosy and golden light, some like +the shadow of a beautiful and sorrowful memory, a restin' down and +reposin' on a divine hope, an infinite sweetness. + + + + +XIII. + +VISITS TO NOTABLE PLACES. + + +It is a perfect sight to behold, to set on the piazzas at Saratoga, +and see the folks a goin' past. + +Now in Jonesville, when there wuz a 4th of July, or campmeetin', +or sunthin' of that kind a goin' on, why, I thought I had seen +the streets pretty full. Why, I had counted as many as seven +teams in the road at one time, and I had thought that wuz pretty +lively times. But good land? Good land! You would have gin up +in ten minutes time here, that you had never seen a team (as it +were). + +Why I call my head a pretty sound one, but I declare, it did +fairly make my head swim to set there kinder late in the +afternoon, and see the drivin' a goin' on. See the carriages a +goin' this way, and a goin' that way; horses of all colers, and +men and wimmen of all colers, and parasols of all colers, and +hats, and bonnets and parasols, and satins, and laces, and +ribbins, and buttons, and dogs, and flowers, and plumes, and +parasols. And horses a turnin' out to go by, and horses havin' +gone by, and horses that hadn't gone by. And big carriages with +folks inside all dressed up in every coler of the rain beaux. +And elligent gentlemen dressed perfectly splendid, a settin' up +straight behind. With thin yellow legs, or stripes down the side +on 'em, and their hats all trimmed off with ornaments and buttons +up and down their backs. + +Haughty creeters they wuz, I make no doubt. They showed it in +their looks. But I never loved so much dress in a man. And I +would jest as soon have told them so; as to tell you. I hain't +one to say things to a man's back that I won't say to his face, +whether it be a plain back or buttoned. + +Wall, as I say, it wuz a dizzy sight to set there on them piazzas +and see the seemin'ly endless crowd a goin' by; back and forth, +back and forth; to and fro, to and fro. I didn't enjoy it so +much as some did, though for a few minutes at a time I looked +upon it as a sort of a recreation, some like a circus, only more +wilder. + +But some folks enjoyed it dretfully. Yes, they set a great deal +on piazzas at Saratoga. And when I say set on 'em, I mean they +set a great store on 'em, and they set on 'em a great deal. Some +folks set on 'em so much, that I called them setters. Real likely +creeters they are too, some on 'em, and handsome; some pious, +sober ones, some sort a gay. Some not married at all, and some +married a good deal, and when I say a good deal I meen, they have +had various companions and lost 'em. + +Now there wuz one woman that I liked quite well. + +She had had 4 husbands countin' in the present one. She wuz a +good lookin' woman and had seen trouble. It stands to reeson she +had with 4 husbands. Good land! + +She showed me one day a ring she wore. She had took the weddin' +rings of her 4 pardners and had 'em all run together, and the +initials of their first names carved inside on it. Her first +husband's name wuz Franklin, her next two wuz Orville and Obed, +and her last and livin' one Lyman. Wall, she meant well, but she +never see what would be the end on't and how it would read till +she had got their initials all carved out on it. + +She wuz dretfully worked up about it, but I see that it wuz right. + For nobody but a fool would want to run all these recollections +and memories together, all the different essociations and emotions, +that must cluster round each of them rings. The idee of runnin' +'em all together with the livin' one! It wuz ectin' like a fool +and it seemed fairly providential that their names run in jest +that way. + +Why, if I had had 2 husbands, or even 4, I should want to keep +'em apart - settin' up in high chairs on different sides of my +heart. Why, if I'd had 4, I'd have 'em to the different pints of +the compass, east, west, north, south, as far apart from each +other as my heart would admit of. Ketch me a lumpin' in all the +precious memories of my Josiah with them of any other man, bond +or free, Jew or Genteel; no, and I'd refrain from tellin' to the +new one about the other ones. + +No, when a pardner dies and you set out to take another one, bury +the one that has gone right under his own high chair in your heart, +don't keep him up there a rattlin' his bones before the eyes of +the 2d, and angerin' him, and agonizen' your own heart. Bury him +before you bring a new one into the same room. + +And never! never! even in moments of the greatest anger, dig him +up agin or even weep over his grave, before the new pardner. No; +under the moonlight, and the stars, before God only, and your own +soul, you may lay there in spirit on that grave, weep over it, +keep the turf green. But not before any one else. And I wouldn't +advise you to go there alone any too often. I would advise you to +spend your spare time ornementin' the high chair where the new one +sets, wreathin' it round with whatever blossoms and trailin' vines +of tenderness and romance you have left over from the first great +romance of life. + +It would be better for you in the end. + +I said some few of these little thoughts to the female mentioned; +and I s'pose I impressed her dretfully, I s'pose I did. But I +couldn't stay to see the full effects on't, for another female +setter came up at that minute to talk with her, and my companion +came up at that very minute to ask me to go a walkin' with him up +to the cemetery. + +That is a very favorite place for Josiah Allen. He often used to +tell the children when they wuz little, that if they wuz real +good he would take 'em out on a walk to the grave-yard. + +And when I first married to him, if I hadn't broke it up, that +would have been the only place of resort that he would have took +me to Summers. But I broke it up after a while. Good land! +there is times to go any where and times to stay away. I didn't +want to go a trailin' up there every day or two; jest married +too! + +But to-day I felt willin' to go. I had been a lookin' so long at +the crowd a fillin' the streets full, and every one on 'em in +motion, that I thought it would be sort a restful to go out to a +place where they wuz still. And so after a short walk we came to +the village that haint stirred by any commotion or alarm. Where +the houses are roofed with green grass and daisies, and the white +stun doors don't open to let in trouble or joy, and where the +inhabitants don't ride out in the afternoon. + +Wall, if I should tell the truth which I am fur from not wantin' +to do, I should say that at first sight, it wuz rather of a +bleak, lonesome lookin' spot, kinder wild and desolate lookin'. +But as we went further along in it, we came to some little nooks +and sheltered paths and spots, that seemed more collected +together and pleasant. There wuz some big high stuns and +monuments, and some little ones but not one so low that it hadn't +cast a high, dark shadow over somebody's life. + +There wuz one in the shape of a big see shell. I s'pose some +mariner lay under that, who loved the sea. Or mebby it wuz put +up by some one who had the odd fancy that put a shell to your ear +you will hear a whisperin' in it of a land fur away, fur away. +Not fur from this wuz a stun put up over a young engineer who had +been killed instantly by his engine. There wuz a picture of the +locomotive scraped out on the stun, and in the cab of the engine +wuz his photograph, and these lines wuz underneath: + + My engine now lies still and cold, + No water does her boiler hold; + The wood supplies its flames no more, + My days of usefulness are o'er. + +We wended our way in and out of the silent streets for quite a +spell, and then we went and sot down on the broad piazza of the +sort of chapel and green-house that stood not fur from the +entrance. And while we sot there we see another inhabitent come +there to the village to stay. + +It wuz a long procession, fur it wuz a good man who had come. +And many of his friends come with him jest as fur as they could: +wife, children, and friends, they come with him jest as fur as +they could, and then he had to leave 'em and go on alone. How +weak love is, and how strong. It wuz too weak to hold him back, +or go with him, though they would fain have done so. But it wuz +strong enough to shadow the hull world with its blackness, blot +out the sun and the stars, and scale the very mounts of heaven +with its wild complaints and pleadin's. A strange thing love is, +haint it? + +Wall, we sot there for quite a spell and my companion wantin', I +spose, to make me happy, took out a daily paper out of his pocket +and went to readin' the deaths to me. He always loves to read +the deaths and marriages in a paper. He sez that is the +literature that interests him. And then I s'pose he thought at +such a time, it wuz highly appropriate. So I didn't break it up +till he began to read a long obituary piece about a child's +death; about its being cut down like a flower by a lightin' +stroke out of a cloudless sky, and about what a mysterious +dispensation of Providence it wuz, etc., etc. And then there wuz +a hull string of poetry dedicated to the heart-broken mother +bewailin' the mystery on't, and wonderin' why Providence should +do such strange, onlookedfor things, etc., and etcetery, and so +4th. + +And I spoke right up and sez, "That is a slander onto Providence +and ort to be took as such by every lover of justice." + +Josiah wuz real horrified, he had been almost sheddin' tears he +wuz so affected by it; to think the little creeter should be torn +away by a strange chance of Providence from a mother who worshipped +her, and whose whole life and every thought wuz jest wrapped up in +the child, and who never had thought nor cared for anything else +only just the well bein' of the child and wardin' trouble off of +her, for so the piece stated. And he sez in wild amaze, "What do +you mean, Samantha? What makes you talk so?" + +"Because," sez I, "I know it is the truth. I know the hull +story;" and then I went on and told it to him, and he agreed with +me and felt jest as I did. + +You see, the mother of the child wuz a perfect high flyer of +fashion and she always wore dresses so tight, that she couldn't +get her hands up to her head to save her life, after her corset +wuz on. Wall, she wuz out a walkin' with the child one day, or +rather toddlin' along with it, on her high-heeled sboes. They +wuz both dressed up perfectly beautiful, and made a most splendid +show. Wall, they went into a store on their way to the park, and +there wuz a big crowd there, and the mother and the little girl +got into the very middle of the crowd. They say there wuz some +new storks for sale that day, and some cattail flags, and so +there wuz naturelly a big crowd of wimmen a buyin' 'em, and +cranes. And some way, while they stood there a heavy vase that +stood up over the child's head fell down and fell onto it, and +hurt the child so, that it died from the effects of it. + +The mother see the vase when it flrst begun to move, she could +have reached up her hands and stiddied it, and kep' it from +fallin', if she could have got 'em up, but with that corset on, +the hull American continent might have tumbled onto the child's +head and she couldn't have moved her arms up to keep it off; +couldn't have lifted her arms up over the child's head to save +her life. No, she couldn't have kep' one of the States off, nor +nothin'. And then talk about her wardin' trouble offen the +child, why she COULDN'T ward trouble off, nor nothin' else with +that corset on. She screemed, as she see it a comin' down onto +the head of her beloved little child, but that wuz all she could +do. The child wuz wedged in by the throng of folks and couldn't +stir, and they wuz all engrossed in their own business which wuz +pressin', and very important, a buyin' plates, and plaks, with +bull-rushes, and cranes, and storks on 'em, so naturelly, they +didn't mind what wuz a goin' on round 'em. And down it come! + +And there it wuz put down in the paper, "A mysterious dispensation +of Providence." Providence slandered shamefully and I will say so +with my last breath. + +What are mothers made for if it haint to take care of the little +ones God gives 'em. What right have they to contoggle themselves +up in a way that they can see their children die before 'em, and +they not able to put out a hand to save 'em. Why, a savage +mother is better than this, a heathen one. And if I had my way, +there would be a hull shipload of savages and heathens brought +over here to teach and reform our too civilized wimmen. I'd +bring 'em over this very summer. + +Wall, we sot there on the stoop for quite a spell and then we +wended our way down to the highway, and as we arrived there my +companion proposed that we should take a carriage and go to the +Toboggen slide. Sez I, "Not after where we have been today, +Josiah Allen." + +And he sez, "Why not?" + +And I sez, "It wouldn't look well, after visitin' the folks we +have jest now." + +"Wall," sez he, "they won't speak on't to anybody, if that is +what you are afraid on, or sense it themselves." + +And I see in a minute, he had some sense on his side, though his +words shocked me some at first, kinder jarred aginst some +sensitive spot in my nater, jest as pardners will sometimes, +however devoted they may be to each other. Yet I see he wuz in +the right on't. + +They wouldn't sense anything about it. And as for us, we wuz in +the world of the livin' still, and I still owed a livin' duty to +my companion, to make him as happy as possible. And so I sez, +mildly, "Wall, I don't know as there is anything wrong in slidin' +down hill, Josiah. I s'pose I can go with you." + +"No," sez he, "there haint nothin' wrong about slidin' down hill +unless you strike too hard, or tip over, or sunthin'." So he +bagoned to a carriage that wuz passin', and we got into it, and +sot sail for the Toboggen slide. + +We passed through the village. (Some say it is a city, but if it +is, it is a modest, retirin' one as I ever see; perfectly +unassumin', and don't put on a air, not one.) + +But howsumever, we passed through it, through the rows and rows +of summer tarvens and boardin' houses, good-lookin' ones too; +past some good-lookin' private houses -- a long tarven and a +pretty red brick studio and rows of summer stores, little nests +that are filled up summers, and empty winters, then by some more +of them monster big tarvens where some of the 200,000 summer +visitors who flock here summers, find a restin' place; and then +by the large respectable good-lookin' stores and shops of the +natives, that stand solid, and to be depended on summer and +winter; by churches and halls, and etc., and good-lookin' houses +and then some splendid-lookin' houses all standin' back on their +grassy lawns behind some trees, and fountains, and flower beds, +etc., etc. + +Better-lookin' houses, I don't want to see nor broader, handsomer +streets. And pretty soon fur away to the east you could see +through the trees a glimpse of a glorious landscape, a broad +lovely view of hill and valley, bounded by blue mountain tops. +It was a fair seen - a fair seen. To be perfectly surrounded by +beauty where you, wuz, and a lookin' off onto more. There I +would fain have lingered, but time and wagons roll stidily +onward, and will not brook delay, nor pause for women to soar +over seenery. + +So we rolled onwards through still more beautiful, and quiet +pictures. Pictures of quiet woods and bendin' trees, and a +country road windin' tranquilly beneath, up and down gentle hills, +and anon a longer one, and then at our feet stood the white walls +of a convent, with 2 or 3 brothers, a strollin' along in their +long black gowns, and crosses, a readin' some books. + +I don't know what it wuz, what they wuz a readin' out of their +books, or a readin' out of their hearts. Mebby sunthin' kinder +sad and serene. Mebby it wuz sunthin' about the gay world of +human happiness, and human sorrows, they had turned backs to +forever. Mebby it wuz about the other world that they had sot +out for through a lonesome way. Mebby it wuz "Never" they wuz a +readin' about, and mebby it wuz "Forever." I don't know what it +wuz. But we went by 'em, and anon, yes it wuz jest anon, for it +wuz the very minute that I lifted my eyes from the Father's calm +and rather sad-lookin' face, that I ketched sight on't, that I +see a comin' down from the high hills to the left on us, an +immense sort of a trough, or so it looked, a comin' right down +through the trees, from the top of the mountain to the, bottom. +And then all acrost the fields as fur, as fur as from our house +way over to Miss Pixley's wuz a sort of a road, with a row of +electric lights along the side on't. + +We drove up to a buildin' that stood at the foot of that immense +slide, or so they called it, and a female woman who wuz there +told us all about it. And we went out her back door, and see way +up the slide, or trough. There wuz a railin' on each side on't, +and a place in the middle where she said the Toboggen came down. + +And sez Josiah, "Who is the Toboggen, anyway? Is he a native of +the place or a Injun? Anyway," sez he, "I'd give a dollar bill +to see him a comin' down that place." + +And the woman said, "A Toboggen wuz a sort of a long sled, that +two or three folks could ride on, and they come down that slide +with such force that they went way out acrost the fields as far +as the row of lights, before it stopped." + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen, did you ever see the beat on't?" Sez I, +"Haint that as far as from our house to Miss Pixley's?" + +"Yes," says he, "and further too. It is as far as Uncle Jim +Hozzleton's." + +"Wall," says I, "I believe you are in the right on't." + +And sez Josiah, "How do they get back agin? Do they come in the +cars, or in their own conveniences?" + +"There is a sleigh to bring 'em back, but sometime they walk +back," sez the woman. + +"Walk back!" sez I, in deep amaze. "Do they walk from way out +there, and cleer up that mountain agin?" + +"Yes," sez she. "Don't you see the place at the side for 'em to +draw the Toboggen up, and the little flights of steps for 'em to +go up the hill?" + +"Wall," sez I, in deep amaze, and auxins as ever to get +information on deep subjects, "where duz the fun come in, is it +in walkin' way over the plain and up the hills, or is it in +comin' down?" + +And she said she didn't know exactly where the fun lay, but she +s'posed it wuz comin' down. Anyway, they seemed to enjoy it +first rate. And she said it wuz a pretty sight to see 'em all on +a bright clear night, when the sky wuz blue and full of stars, +and the earth white and glistenin' underneath to see 7 or 800, +all dressed up in to gayest way, suits of white blankets, gay +borders and bright tasseled caps of every color, and suits of +every other pretty color all trimmed with fur and embroideries, +to see 'em all a laughin' and a talkin', with their cheeks and +eyes bright and glowin', to see 'em a comin' down the slide like +flashes of every colored light, and away out over the white +glistenin' plains; and then to see the long line of happy laughin' +creeters a walkin' back agin' drawin' the gay Toboggens. She +said it wuz a sight worth seein'. + +"Do they come down alone?" sez Josiah. + +"Oh no!" sez she. "Boys and their sweethearts, men and wives, +fathers and mothers and children, sometimes 4 on a Toboggan." + +Sez Josiah, lookin' anamated and clever, "I'd love to take you on +one on 'em, Samantha.' + +"Oh no!" sez I, "I wouldn't want to be took." + +But a bystander a standin' by said it wuz a sight to behold to +stand up on top and start off. He said the swiftness of the +motion, the brightness of the electric lights ahead, the gleam of +the snow made it seem like plungin' down a dazzlin' Niagara of +whiteness and glitterin' light; and some, like bein' shot out of +a cannon. Why, he said they went with such lightnin' speed, that +if you stood clost by the slide a waitin' to see a friend go by, +you might stand so near as to touch her, but you couldn't no more +see her to recognize her, than you could recognize one spoke from +another in the wheel of a runaway carriage. You would jest see a +red flash go by, if so be it wuz a red gown she had on. A red +flash a dartin' through the air, and a disappearin' down the long +glitterin' lane of light. + +You could see her a goin' back, so they said, a laughin' and a +jokin' with somebody, if so be she walked back, but there wuz +long sleighs to carry 'em back, them and their Toboggens, if they +wanted to ride, at the small expenditure of 10 cents apiece. +They go, in the fastest time anybody can make till they go on the +lightnin', a way in which they will go before long, I think, and +Josiah duz too. + +"They said there wuzn't nothin' like it. And I said, "Like as +not." I believed 'em. And then the woman said, "This long room +we wuz a standin' in," for we had gone back into the house, +durin' our interview, this long room wuz all warm and light for +'em to come into and get warm, and she said as many as 600 in a +night would come in there and have supper there. + +And then she showed us the model of a Toboggen, all sculped out, +with a man and a woman on it. The girl wuz ahead sort a drawin' +the Toboggen, as you may say, and her lover. (I know he wuz, +from his looks.) He wuz behind her, with his face right clost to +her shoulder. + +And I'll bet that when they started down that gleamin' slide, +they felt as if they 2 wuz alone under the stars and the heavens, +and wuz a glidin' down into a dazzlin' way of glory. You could +see it in their faces. I liked their faces real well. + +But the sight on 'em made Josiah Allen crazier'n ever to go too, +and he sez, "I feel as if I must Toboggen, Samantha!" + +Sez I, "Be calm! Josiah, you can't slide down hill in July." + +"How do you know?" sez he, "I'm bound to enquire." And he asked +the woman if they ever Toboggened in the summer. + +"No, never!" sez she. + +And I sez, "You see it can't be done." + +"She never see it tried," sez he. "How can you tell what you can +do without tryin'?" sez he lookin' shrewdly, and longingly, up +the slide. I trembled, for I knew not what the next move of his +would be. But I bethought me of a powerful weepon I had by me. +And I sez, "The driver will ask pay for every minute we are +here." + +And as I sez this, Josiah turned and almost flew down the steps +and into the buggy. I had skairt him. Truly I felt relieved, +and sez I to myself, "What would wimmen do if it wuzn't for these +little weepons they hold in their hands, to control their +pardners with." I felt happy. + +But the next words of Josiah knocked down all that palace of +Peace, that my soul had betook herself to. Sez he, "Samantha +Allen, before I leave Saratoga I shall Toboggen." + +Wall, I immegetly turned the subject round and talked wildly and +almost incoherently on politicks. I praised the tariff amost +beyond its deserts. I brung up our foreign relations, and spoke +well on 'em. I tackled revenues and taxation, and hurried him +from one to the other on 'em, almost wildly, to get the idee out +of his head. And I congratulated myself on havin' succeeded. +Alas! how futile is our hopes, sometimes futiler than we have any +idee on! + +By night all thoughts of danger had left me, and I slept sweetly +and peacefully. But early in the mornin' I had a strange dream. +I dreamed I wuz in the woods with my head a layin' on a log, and +the ground felt cold that I wuz a layin' on. And then the log +gin way with me, and my head came down onto the ground. And then +I slept peaceful agin, but chilly, till anon, or about that time, +I beard a strange sound and I waked up with a start. It wuz in +the first faint glow of mornin' twilight. But as faint as the +light wuz, for the eye of love is keen, I missed my beloved +pardner's head from the opposite pillow, and I riz up in wild +agitation and thinkses I, "Has rapine took place here; has Josiah +Allen been abducted away from me? Is he a kidnapped Josiah?" + +At that fearful thought my heart begun to beat so voyalently as +to almost stop my breath, and I felt I wuz growin' pale and wan, +wanner, fur wanner than I had been sense I came to Saratoga. I +love Josiah Allen, he is dear to me. + +And I riz up feelin' that I would find that dear man and rescue +him or perish in the attempt. Yes, I felt that I must perish if +I did not find him. What would life be to me without him? And +as I thought that thought the light of the day that wuz a +breakin', looked sort of a faint to me, and sickish. And like a +flash it came to me, the thought that that light seemed like the +miserable dawns of wretched days without him, a pale light with +no warmth or brightness in it. + +But at that very minute I heard a noise outside the door, and I +heard that beloved voice a sayin' in low axents the words I had +so often heard him speak, words I had oft rebuked him for, but +now, so weak will human love make one, now, I welcome them gladly +-- they sounded exquisitely sweet to me. The words wuz, "Dumb +'em!" + +And I joyfully opened the door. But oh! what a sight met my eye. +There stood Josiah Allen, arrayed in a blanket he had took from +our bed (that accounted for my cold feelin' in my dream). The +blanket wuz white, with a gay border of red and yellow. He had +fixed it onto him in a sort of a dressy way, and strapped it +round the waist with my shawl strap. And he had took a bright +yeller silk handkerchief of hisen, and had wrapped it round his +head so's it hung down some like a cap, and he wuz a tryin' to +fasten it round his forward with one of my stockin' supporters. +He couldn't buckle it, and that is what called forth his +exclamations. At his feet, partly upon the stairs, wuz the +bolster from our bed (that accounted for the log that had gin +way). And he had spread a little red shawl of mine over the top +on't, and as I opened the door he wuz jest ready to embark on the +bolster, he waz jest a steppin' onto it. But as he see me he +paused, and I sez in low axents, "What are you a goin' to do, +Josiah Allen?" + +"I'm a goin' to Toboggen," sez he. + +Sez I, "Do you stop at once, and come back into your room." + +"No, no!" sez he firmly, and preparin' to embark on the bolster, +"I am a goin' to Toboggen. And you come and go to. It is so +fashionable," sez he, "such a genteel diversion." + +Sez I, "Do you stop it at once, and come back to your room. +Why," sez I, "the hull house will be routed up, and be up here in +a minute." + +"Wall," sez he, "they'll see fun if they do and fashion. I am a +goin', Samantha!" and be stepped forward. + +Sez I, "They'll see sunthin' else that begins with a f, but it +haint fun or fashion.' And agin I sez, "Do you come back, Josiah +Allen. You'll break your neck and rout up the house, and be +called a fool." + +"Oh no, Samantha! I must Toboggen. I must go down the slide +once." And he fixed the bolster more firmly on the top stair. + +"Wall," sez I, feelin' that I wuz drove to my last ambush by him, +sez I, "probably five dollars won't make the expenses good, +besides your doctor's bill, and my mornin'. And I shall put on +the deepest of crape, Josiah Allen," sez I. + +I see he wavered and I pressed the charge home. Sez I, "That +bolster is thin cloth, Josiah Allen, and you'll probably have to +pay now for draggin' it all over the floor. If anybody should +see you with it there, that bolster would be charged in your +bill. And how would it look to the neighbors to have a bolster +charged in your bill? And I should treasure it, Josiah Allen, as +bein' the last bill you made before you broke your neck !" + +"Oh, wall," sez he, "I s'pose I can put the bolster back." But +he wuz snappish, and he kep' snappish all day. + +He wuzn't quelled. Though he had gin in for the time bein' I see +he wuzn't quelled down. He acted dissatisfied and highheaded, +and I felt worried in my mind, not knowin' what his next move +would be. + +Oh! the tribulations it makes a woman to take care of a man. But +then it pays. After all, in the deepest of my tribulations I +feel, I do the most of the time feel, that it pays. When he is +good he is dretful good. + +Wall, I went over to see Polly Pixley the next night, and when I +got back to my room, there stood Josiah Allen with both of his +feet sort a bandaged and tied down onto sumthin', which I didn't +at first recognize. It waz big and sort a egg shaped, and open +worked, and both his feet wuz strapped down tight onto it, and he +wuz a pushin' himself round the room with his umberell. + +And I sez, "What is the matter now, Josiah Allen; what are you a +doin' now?" + +"Oh I am a walkin' on snow-shoes, Samantha! But I don't see," +sez he a stoppin' to rest, for he seemed tuckered out, "I don't +see how the savages got round as they did and performed such +journeys. You put 'em on, Samantha," sez he, "and see if you can +get on any faster in 'em." + +Sez I, coldly, "The savages probable did'nt have both feet on one +shoe, Josiah Allen, as you have. I shall put on no snowshoes in +the middle of July; but if I did, I should put 'em on accordin' +to a little mite of sense. I should try to use as much sense as +a savage any way." + +"Why, how it would look to have one foot on that great big +snow-shoe. I always did like a good close fit in my shoes. And +you see I have room enough and to spare for both on 'em on this. +Why it wouldn't look dressy at all, Samantha, to put 'em on as +you say." + +Sez I very coldly, "I don't see anything over and above dressy in +your looks now, Josiah Allen, with both of your feet tied down +onto that one shoe, and you a tryin' to move off when you can't. +I can't see anything over and above ornamental in it, Josiah +Allen." + +"Oh! you are never willin' to give in that I look dressy, +Samantha. But I s'pose I can put my feet where you say. You are +so sot, but they are too big for me -- I shall look like a fool." + +I looked at him calmly over my specks, and sez I, "I guess I +sha'n't notice the difference or realize the change. I wonder," +sez I, in middlin' cold axents, "how you think you are a lookin' +now, Josiah Allen." + +"Oh! keep a naggin' at me!" sez he. But I see he wuz a gittin' +kinder sick of the idee. + +"What you mean by puttin' 'em on at all is more than I can say," +sez I, "a tryin to walk on snowshoes right in dog-days." + +"I put 'em on," Samantha, sez he, a beginnin' to unstrap 'em, "I +put 'em on because I wanted to feel like a savage." + +"Wall," sez I, "I have seen you at times durin' the last 20 years, +when I thought you realized how they felt without snow-shoes on, +either." + +(These little interchanges of confidence will take place in +every-day life.) But at that very minute Ardelia Tutt rapped at +the door, and Josiah hustled them snow-shoes into the closet, and +that wuz the last trial I had with him about 'em. He had +borrowed 'em. + +Wall, Ardelia wuz dretful pensive, and soft actin' that night, +she seemed real tickled to see us, and to get where we wuz. She +haint over and above suited with the boardin' place where she is, +I think. I don't believe they have very good food, though she +won't complain, bein' as they are relations on her own side. And +then she is sech a good little creeter anyway. But I had my +suspicions. She didn't seem very happy. She said she had been +down to the park that afternoon, she and the young chap that has +been a payin' her so much attention lately, Bial Flamburg. She +said they had sot down there by the deer park most all the +afternoon a watchin' the deer. She spoke dretful well of the +deer. And they are likely deer for anything I know. But she +seemed sort a pensive and low spirited. Mebby she is a beginnin' +to find Bial Flamburg out. Mebby she is a beginnin' to not like +his ways. He drinks and smokes, that I know, and I've mistrusted +worse things on him. + + + + +XIV. + +LAKE GEORGE AND MOUNT McGREGOR. + + +It wuz on a nice pleasant day that Ardelia Tuit, Josiah Allen, +and me, met by previous agreement quite early in the mornin', A. +M., and sot out for Lake George. It is so nigh, that you can +step onto the cars, and go out and see George any time of day. + +It seemed to me jest as if George wuz glad we had come, for there +wuz a broad happy smile all over his face, and a sort of a dimplin' +look, as if he wanted to laugh right out. All the beckonin' shores +and islands, with their beautiful houses on 'em, and the distant +forests, and the trees a bendin' over George, all seemed to sort a +smile out a welcome to us. We had a most beautiful day, and got +back quite late in the afternoon, P. M. + +And the next day, a day heavenly calm and fair, Josiah Allen and +me sot sail for Mount McGregor -- that mountain top that is +lifted up higher in the hearts of Americans than any other peak +on the continent -- fur higher. For it is the place where the +memory of a Hero lays over all the peaceful landscape like a +inspiration and a benediction, and will rest there forever. + +The railroad winds round and round the mountain sometimes not +seemin'ly goin' up at all, but gradually a movin' in' on towards +the top, jest as this brave Hero did in his career. If some of +the time he didn't seem to move on, or if some of the time he +seemed to go back for a little, yet there wuz a deathless fire +inside on him, a power, a strength that kep' him a goin' up, up, +up, and drawin' the nation up with him onto the safe level ground +of Victory. + +We got pleasant glimpses of beauty, pretty pictures on't, every +little while as we wended our way on up the mountains. Anon we +would go round a curve, a ledge of rocks mebby, and lo! far off a +openin' through the woods would show us a lovely picture of hill +and dell, blue water and blue mountains in the distance. And +then a green wood picture, shut in and lonely, with tall ferns, +and wild flowers, and thick green grasses under the bendin' +trees. Then fur down agin' a picture of a farmhouse, sheltered +and quiet, with fields layin' about it green and golden. + +But anon, we reached the pretty little lonesome station, and +there we wuz on top of Mount McGregor. We disembarked from the +cars and wended our way up the hill up the windin' foot path, +wore down by the feet of pilgrims from every land, quite a tegus +walk though beautiful, up to the good-lookin', and good appearin' +tarven. + +I would fain have stopped at that minute at the abode the Hero +had sanctified by his last looks. But my companion said to me +that he wuz in nearly a starvin' state. Now it wuzn't much after +11 A. M. forenoon, and I felt that he would not die of starvation +so soon. But his looks wuz pitiful in the extreme and he reminded +me in a sort of a weak voice that he didn't eat no breakfast +hardly. + +I sez truthfully, "I didn't notice it, Josiah." But sez I, "I +will accompany you where your hunger can be slaked." So we went +straight up to the tarven. + +But I would stop a minute in front of it, to see the lovely, +lovely seen that wuz spread out before our eyes. For fur off +could we see milds and milds of the beautiful country a layin' +fur below us. Beautiful landscape, dotted with crystal lakes, +laved by the blue Hudson and bordered by the fur-away mountains. + +It wuz a fair seen, a fair seen. Even Josiah wuz rousted up by +it, and forgot his hunger. I myself wuz lost in the contemplation +on it, and entirely by the side of myself. So much so, that I +forgot where I wuz, and whether I wuz a wife or a widow, or what +I wuz. + +But anon, as my senses came back from the realm of pure beauty +they had been a traversin', I recollected that I wuz a wife, that +Providence and Elder Minkley had placed a man in my hands to take +care on; and I see he wuz gone from me, and I must look him up. + +And I found that man in one of the high tallish lookin' swing +chairs that wuz a swingin' from high poles all along the brow of +the hill. They looked some like a stanchol for a horse, and some +like a pair of galluses that criminals are hung on. + +Josiah wuzn't able to work it right and it did require a deep +mind to get into one without peril. And he wuz on the brink of +a catastrophe. I got him out by siezin' the chair and holdin' +it tight, till he dismounted from it -- which he did with words +unadapted to the serenity of the atmosphere. And then we went +out the broad pleasant door-yard up into the tarven, and my +companion got some coffee, and some refreshments, to refresh +ourselves with. And then he, feelin' clever and real +affectionate to me (owin' partly I s'pose to the good dinner), +we wended our way down to the cottage where the Hero met his +last foe and fell victorious. + +We went up the broad steps onto the piazza, and I looked off from +it, and over all the landscape under the soft summer sky, lay +that same beautiful tender inspired memory. It lay like the hush +that follows a prayer at a dyin' bed. Like the glow that rests +on the world when the sun has gone down in glory. Like the +silence full of voices that follows a oriter's inspired words. + +The air, the whole place, thrilled with that memory, that +presence that wuz with us, though unseen to the eyes of our +spectacles. It followed us through the door way, it went ahead +on us into the room where the pen wuz laid down for the last +time, where the last words wuz said. That pen wuz hung up over +the bed where the tired head had rested last. By the bedside wuz +the candle blowed out, when he got to the place where it is so +light they don't need candles. The watch stopped at the time +when he begun to recken time by the deathless ages of immortality. +And as I stood there, I said to myself, "I wish I could see the +faces that wuz a bendin' over this bed, August 11th, 1885." + +All the ministerin' angels, and heroes, and conquerors, all a +waitin' for him to join 'em. All the Grand Army of the Republic, +them who fell in mountain and valley; the lamented and the +nameless, all, all a waitin' for the Leader they loved, the +silent, quiet man, whose soul spoke, who said in deeds what +weaker spirits waste in language. + +I wished I could see the great army that stood around Mount +McGregor that day. I wished I could hear the notes of the +immortal revelee, which wuz a soundin' all along the lines +callin' him to wake from his earth sleep into life -- callin' +him from the night here, the night of sorrow and pain, into +the mornin'. + +And as I lifted my eyes, the eyes of the General seemed to look +cleer down into my soul, full of the secrets that he could tell +now, if he wanted to, full of the mysteries of life, the mysteries +of death. The voiceless presence that filled the hull landscape, +earth and air, looked at us through them eyes, half mournful, +prophetic, true and calm, they wuz a lookin' through all the past, +through all the future. What did they see there? I couldn't tell, +nor Josiah. + +In another room wuz the flowers from many climes. Flowers +strewed onto the stage from hands all over the world, when the +foot lights burned low, and the dark curtain went down for the +last time on the Hero. Great masses of flowers, every one on +'em, bearin' the world's love, the world's sorrow over our +nation's loss. + +I had a large quantity of emotions as I stood there, probably as +many as 48 a minute for quite a spell, and that is a large number +of emotions to have, when the size of 'em is as large as the +sizes of 'em wuz. I thought as I stood there of what I had hearn +the Hero said once in his last illness, that, liftin' up his +grand right arm that had saved the Nation, he said, "I am on duty +from four to six." + +Yes, thinkses I, he wuz on duty all through the shadows and the +darkness of war, all through the peril, and the heartache, and +the wild alarm of war, calm and dauntless, he wuz on duty till +the mornin' of peace came, and the light wuz shinin'. + +On duty through the darkness. No one believed, no one dared to +think that if peril had come again to the country, he would not +have been ready,-- ready to face danger and death for the people +he had saved once, the people whom he loved, because he had dared +death for 'em. + +Yes, he wuz on duty. + +There wuz a darker shadow come to him than any cloud that ever +rose over a battle-field when, honest and true himself as the +light, he still stood under the shadow of blame and impendin' +want, stood in the blackest shadow that can cover generous, +faithful hearts, the heart-sickenin' shadow of ingratitude; when +the people he had saved from ruin hesitated, and refused to give +him in the time of his need the paltry pension, the few dollars +out of the millions he had saved for them, preferring to allow +him, the greatest hero of the world, the man who had represented +them before the nations, to sell the badges and swords he had +worn in fightin' their battles, for bread for himself and wife. + +But he wuz on duty all through this night. Patient, uncomplainin'. +And not one of these warriors fightin' their bloodless battle of +words aginst him, would dare to say that he would not have been +ready at any minute, to give his life agin for these very men, had +danger come to the country and they had needed him. + +And when hastened on by the shock, and the suspense, death seemed +to be near him, so near that it seemed as if the burden must needs +be light -- the tardy justice that came to him must have seemed +like an insult, but if he thought so he never said it; no, brave +and patient, he wuz on duty. + +And all through the long, long time that he looked through the +shadows for a more sure foe than had ever lain in Southern ambush +for him, he wuz on duty. Not an impatient word, not an anxious +word. Of all the feerin', doubtin', hopin', achin' hearts about +him, he only wuz calm. + +For, not only his own dear ones, but the hull country, friends +and foes alike, as if learnin' through fear of his loss how grand +a hero he wuz, and how greatly and entirely he wuz beloved by +them all, they sent up to Heaven such a great cloud of prayers +for his safety as never rose for any man. But he only wuz calm, +while the hull world wuz excited in his behalf. + +For the sight of his patient work, the sight of him who stopped +dyin' (as it were) to earn by his own brave honest hand the +future comfort of his family, amazed, and wonderin' at this +spectacle, one of the greatest it seems to me that ever wuz seen +on earth, the hull nation turned to him in such a full hearted +love, and admiration, and worship, that they forgot in their +quicker adorin' heart-throbs, the slower meaner throbs they had +gin him, this same brave Hero, jest as brave and true-hearted in +the past as he wuz on his grand death-bed. + +They forgot everything that had gone by in their worship, and I +don't know but I ort to. Mebby I had. I shouldn't wonder a mite +if I had. But all the while, all through the agony and the labor, +and when too wearied he lay down the pen, -- he wuz on duty. + +Waitin' patiently, fearlessly, till he should see in the first +glow of the sunrise the form of the angel comin' to relieve his +watch, the tall, fair angel of Rest, that the Great Commander +sent down in the mornin' watches to relieve his weary soldier, +that divinest angel that ever comes to the abode of men, though +her beauty shines forever through tears, led by her hand, he has +left life's battle-field forever; and what is left to this nation +but memory, love, and mebby remorse. + +But little matters it to him, the Nation's love or the Nation's +blame, restin' there by the calm waters he loved. The tides come +in, and the tides go out; jest as they did in his life; the +fickle tide of public favor that swept by him, movin' him not on +his heavenly mission of duty and patriotism. + +The tides go out, and the tides come in; the wind wails and the +wind sings its sweet summer songs; but he does not mind the +melody or the clamor. He is resting. Sleep on, Hero beloved, +while the world wakes to praise thee. + +Wall, we sot sail from Mount McGregor about half-past four P. M., +afternoon. And we wound round and round the mountain side jest +as he did, only goin' down into the valley instid of upwards. +But the trees that clothed the bare back of the mountain looked +green and shinin' in the late afternoon sunlight, and the fields +spread out in the valley looked green and peaceful under the cool +shadows of approachin' sunset. + +And right in the midst of one of these fields, all full of white +daisies, the cars stopped and the conductor sung out: "Five +minutes' stop at Daisy station. Five minutes to get out and pick +daisies." + +And sez Josiah to me in gruff axents, when I asked him if he wuz +goin' to get out and pick some. Sez he, "Samantha, no man can go +ahead of me in hatin' the dumb weeds, and doin' his best towards +uprootin' 'em in my own land; and I deeply sympathize with any +man who is over run by 'em. But why am I beholdin' to the man +that owns this lot? Why should I and all the rest of this +carload of folks, all dressed up in our best too, lay hold and +weed out these infernal nuisances for nothin'?" + +Yes, he said these fearfully profane words to me and I herd him +in silence, for I did not want to make a seen in public. Sez I, +"Josiah, they are pickin' 'em because they love 'em." + +"Love 'em!" Oh, the fearful, scornful unbelievin' look that came +over my pardner's face, as I said these peaceful words to him. +And he added a expletive which I am fur from bein' urged to ever +repeat. It wuz sinful. + +"Love 'em!" Agin he sez. And agin follerd a expletive that wuz +still more forcible, and still more sinful. And I felt obliged +to check him which I did. And after a long parlay, in which I +used my best endeavors of argument and reason to convince him +that I wuz in the right on't, I see he wuzn't convinced. And +then I spoke about its bein' fashionable to get out and pick 'em, +and he looked different to once. I could see a change in him. +All my arguments of the beauty and sweetness of the posies had no +effect, but when I said fashionable, he faltered, and he sez, "Is +it called a genteel diversion?" + +And I sez, "Yes." + +And finally he sez, "Wall, I s'pose I can go out and pick some +for you. Dumb their dumb picters." + +Sez I, "Don't go in that spirit, Josiah Allen." + +"Wall, I shall go in jest that sprit," he snapped out, "if I go +at all." And he went. + +But oh! it wuz a sight to set and look on, and see the look onto +his face, as he picked the innocent blossoms. It wuz a look of +such deep loathin', and hatred, combined with a sort of a genteel, +fashionable air. + +Altogether it wuz the most curius, and strange look, that I ever +see outside of a menagery of wild animals. And he had that same +look onto his face as he came in and gin 'em to me. He had +yanked'em all up by their roots too, which made the Bokay look +more strange. But I accepted of it in silence, for I see by his +mean that he wuz not in a condition to brook another word. + +And I trembled when a bystander a standin' by who wuz arrangin' +a beautiful bunch of 'em, a handlin' 'em as flowers ort to be +handled, as if they had a soul, and could feel a rough or tender +touch, -- this man sez to Josiah, "I see that you too love this +beautiful blossom." + +I wuz glad the man's eyes wuz riveted onto his Bokay, for the +ferocity of Josiah Allen's look wuz sunthin' fearful. He looked +as if he could tear him lim' from lim'. + +And I hastily drawed Josiah to a seat at the other end of the +car, and voyalently, but firmly, I drawed his attention off onto +Religion. + +I sez, "Josiah, do you believe we had better paint the steeple of +the meetin'-house, white or dark colered?" + +This wuz a subject that had rent Jonesville to its very twain. +And Josiah had been fearfully exercised on it. And this plan of +mine succeeded. He got eloquent on it, and I kinder held off, +and talked offish, and let him convince me. + +I did it from principle. + + + + +XV. + +ADVENTURES AT VARIOUS SPRINGS. + + +A few days after this, Josiah Allen came in, and sez he, "The +Everlastin' spring is the one for me, Samantha! I believe it +will keep me alive for hundreds and hundreds of years." + +Sez I, "I don't believe that, Josiah Allen." + +"Wall, it is so, whether you believe it or not. Why, I see a +feller just now who sez he don't believe anybody would ever die +at all, if they kep' themselves' kind a wet through all the time +with this water." + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen, you are not talkin' Bible. The Bible sez, +'all flesh is as grass.'" + +"Wall, that is what he meant; if the grass wuz watered with that +water all the time, it would never wilt." + +"Oh, shaw!" sez I. (I seldom say shaw, but this seemed to me a +time for shawin'.) + +But Josiah kep' on, for he wuz fearfully excited. Sez he, "Why, +the feller said, there wuz a old man who lived right by the side +of this spring, and felt the effects of it inside and out all the +time, it wuz so healthy there. Why the old man kep' on a livin', +and a livin' till he got to be a hundred. And he wuz kinder lazy +naturally and he got tired of livin'. He said he wuz tired of +gettin' up mornin's and dressin' of him, tired of pullin' on his +boots and drawin' on his trowsers, and he told his grandson Sam +to take him up to Troy and let him die. + +"Wall, Sam took him up to Troy, and he died right away, almost. +And Sam bein' a good-hearted chap, thought it would please the +old man to he buried down by the spring, that healthy spot. So +he took him back there in a wagon he borrowed. And when he got +clost to the spring, Sam heard a sithe, and he looked back, and +there the old gentleman wuz a settin' up a leanin' his head on +his elbo and he sez, in a sort of a sad way, not mad, but +melanecolly, `You hadn't ort to don it, Sam. You hadn't ort to. +I'm in now for another hundred years.'" + +I told Josiah I didn't believe that. Sez I, "I believe the +waters are good, very good, and the air is healthy here in the +extreme, but I don't believe that." + +But he said it wuz a fact, and the feller said he could prove it. +"Why," Josiah sez, "with the minerals there is in that spring, if +you only take enough of it, I don't see how anybody can die." +And sez Josiah, "I am a goin' to jest live on that water while I +am here." + +"Wall," sez I, "you must do as you are a mind to, with fear and +tremblin'." + +I thought mebby quotin' Scripture to him would kinder quell him +down, for he wuz fearfully agitated and wrought up about the +Everlastin' spring. And he begun at once to calculate on it, on +how much he could drink of it, if he begun early in the mornin' +and drinked late at night. + +But I kep' on megum. I drinked the waters that seemed to help me +and made me feel better, but wuz megum in it, and didn't get over +excited about any on 'em. But oh! oh! the quantities of that +water that Josiah Allen took! Why, it seemed as if he would make +a perfect shipwreck of his own body, and wash himself away, till +one day he came in fearful excited agin, and sez he, in agitated +axents, "I made a mistake, Samantha. The Immortal spring is the +one for me." + +"Why?" sez I. + +"Oh, I have jest seen a feller that has been a tellin' me about it." + +"What did he say?" sez I, in calm axents. + +"Wall, I'll tell you. It has acted on my feelin's dretful." Says +he, "I have shed some tears." (I see Josiah Allen had been a +cryin' when he came in.) + +And I sez agin, "What is it?" + +"Wall," he said, "this man had a dretful sick wife. And he wuz a +carryin' her to the Immortal spring jest as fast as he could, for +he felt it would save her, if he could get her to it. But she +died a mile and a half from the spring. It wuz night, for he had +traveled night and day to get her there, and the tarvens wuz all +shut up, and he laid her on the spring-house floor, and laid down +himself on one of the benches. He took a drink himself, the last +thing before he laid down, for he felt that he must have sunthin' +to sustain him in his affliction. + +"Wall, in the night he heard a splashin', and he rousted up, and +he see that he had left the water kinder careless the night before, +and it had broke loose and covered the floor and riz up round the +body, and there she wuz, all bright and hearty, a splashin' and a +swimmin' round in the water." He said the man cried like a child +when he told him of it. + +And sez Josiah, "It wuz dretful affectin'. It brought tears from +me, to hear on't. I thought what if it had been you, Samantha!" + +"Wall," sez I, "I don't see no occasion for tears, unless you +would have been sorry to had me brung to." + +"Oh!" sez Josiah, "I didn't think! I guess I have cried in the +wrong place." + +Sez I coldly, "I should think as much." + +And Josiah put on his hat and hurried out. He meant well. But +it is quite a nack for pardners to know jest when to cry, and +when to laff. + +Wall, he follered up that spring, and drinked more, fur more than +wuz good for him of that water. And then anon, he would hear of +another one, and some dretful big story about it, and he would +foller that up, and so it went on, he a follerin' on, and I a +bein' megum, and drinkin' stiddy, but moderate. And as it might +be expected, I gained in health every day, and every hour. For +the waters is good, there haint no doubt of it. + +But Josiah takin' em as he did, bobbin' round from one to the +other, drinkin' 'em at all hours of day and night, and floodin' +himself out with 'em, every one on 'em -- why, he lost strength +and health every day, till I felt truly, that if it went on much +longer, I should go home in weeds. Not mullein, or burdock, or +anything of that sort, but crape. + +But at last a event occurred that sort a sot him to thinkin' and +quelled him down some. One day we sot out for a walk, Josiah and +Ardelia Tutt and me. And in spite of all my protestations, my +pardner had drinked 11 glasses full of the spring he wuz a +follerin' then. And he looked white round the lips as anything. +And Ardelia and I wuz a sittin' in a good shady place, and Josiah +a little distance off, when a man ackosted him, a man with black +eyes and black whiskers, and sez, "You look pale, Sir. What +water are you a drinkin'?" + +And Josiah told him that at that time he wuz a drinkin' the water +from the Immortal spring. + +"Drinkin' that water?" sez the man, startin' back horrefied. + +"Yes," sez Josiah, turnin' paler than ever, for the man's looks +wuz skairful in the extreme. + +"Oh! oh!" groaned the man. "And you are a married man?" he groaned +out mournfully, a lookin' pitifully at him. "With a family?" + +"Yes," sez Josiah, faintly. + +"Oh dear," sez the man, "must it be so, to die, so -- so lamented?" + +"To die!" sez Josiah, turnin' white jest round the lip. + +"Yes, to die! Did you not say you had been a drinkin' the water +from the Immortal spring?" + +"Yes," sez Josiah. + +"Wall, it is a certain, a deadly poison." + +"Haint there no help for me?" sez Josiah. + +"Yes," sez the man, "You must drink from the Live-forever spring, +at the other end of the village. That water has the happy effect +of neutralizin' the poisons of the Immortal spring. If anything +can save you that can. Why," sez he, "folks that have been +entirely broke down, and made helpless and hopeless invalids, +them that have been brung down on their death-beds by the use of +that vile Immortal water, have been cured by a few glasses of the +pure healin' waters of the Live-forever spring. I'd advise you +for your own sake, and the sake of your family, who would mourn +your ontimely decese, to drink from that spring at once." + +"But," sez Josiah, with a agonized and hopeless look, "I can't +drink no more now." + +"Why?" sez the man. + +"Because I don't hold any more. I don't hold but two quarts, and +I have drinked 11 tumblers full now." + +"Eleven glasses of that poison?" sez the man. + +"Wall, if it is too late I am not to blame. I've warned you. +Farewell," sez he, a graspin' holt of Josiah's hand. "Farewell, +forever. But if you do live," sez he, "if by a miricle you are +saved, remember the Live-forever spring. If there is any help +for you it is in them waters." + +And he dashed away, for another stranger wuz approachin' the +seen. + +I, myself, didn't have no idee that Josiah wuz a goin' to die. +But Ardelia whispered to me, she must go back to the hotel, so +she went. I see she looked kinder strange, and I didn't object +to it. And when we got back she handed me some verses entitled: + +"Stanzas on the death of Josiah Allen." + +She handed 'em to me, and hastened away, quick. But Josiah Allen +didn't die. And this incident made him more megum. More as I +wanted him to be. Why, you have to be megum in everything, no +matter how good it is. Milk porridge, or the Bible, or anything. +You can kill yourself on milk porridge if you drink enough. And +you can set down and read the Bible, till you grow to your chair, +and lose your eyesight. + +Now these waters are dretful good, but you have got to use some +megumness with 'em, it stands to reason you have. Taint megum to +drink from 10 to 12 glasses at a time, and mix your drinks goin' +round from spring to spring like a luny. No; get a good doctor +to tell you what minerals you seem to stand in need on the most, +and then try to get 'em with fear and tremblin'. You'll get help +I haint a doubt on't. For they are dretful good for varius +things that afflict the human body. Dretful! + + + + +XVI. + +AT A LAWN PARTY. + + +Wall, the very next mornin' Miss Flamm sent word for Josiah and me +to come that night to a lawn party. And I sez at once, "I must go +and get some lawn." + +Sez Josiah, "What will you do with it?" + +And I sez, "Oh, I s'pose I shall wrap it round me, I'll do what +the rest do." + +And sez Josiah, "Hadn't I ort to have some too? If it is a lawn +party and everybody else has it, I shall feel like a fool without +any lawn." + +And I looked at him in deep thought, and through him into the +causes and consequences of things, and sez I, "I s'pose you do ort +to have a lawn necktie, or handkerchief, or sunthin'." + +Sez he, "How would a vest look made out of it, a kinder sprigged +one, light gay colors on a yaller ground-work?" + +But I sez at once, "You never will go out with me, Josiah, with a +lawn vest on." And I settled it right there on the spot. + +Then he proposed to have some wrapped round his hat, sort a +festooned. But I stood like marble aginst that idee. But I knew +I had got to have some lawn, and pretty soon we sallied out +together and wended our way down to where I should be likely to +find a lawn store. + +And who should we meet a comin' out of a store but Ardelia. Her +3d cousin had sent her over to get a ingregient for cookin'. +Good, willin' little creeter! She walked along with us for a +spell. And while she wuz a walkin' along with us, we come onto a +sight that always looked pitiful to me, the old female that wuz +always a' sittin' there a singin' and playin' on a accordeun. And +it seemed to me that she looked pitifuller and homblier than ever, +as she sot there amongst the dense crowd that mornin' a singin' +and a playin'. Her tone wuz thin, thin as gauze, hombly gause +too. But I wondered to myself how she wuz a feelin' inside of her +own mind, and what voices she heard a speakin' to her own soul, +through them hombly strains. And, ontirely unbeknown to myself, I +fell into a short revery (short but deep) right there in the +street, as I looked down on her, a settin' there so old, and +patient and helpless, amongst the gay movin' throng. + +And I wondered what did she see, a settin' there with her blind +eyes, what did she hear through them hombly tones that she wuz a +singin' day after day to a crowd that wuz indifferent to her, or +despised her? Did she hear the song of the mornin', the spring +time of life? Did the song of a lark come back to her, a lark +flyin' up through the sweet mornin' sky over the doorway of a +home, a lark watched by young eyes, two pairs of 'em, that made +the seein' a blessedness? Did a baby's first sweet blunders of +speech, and happy laughter come back to her, as she sot there a +drawin' out with her wrinkled hands them miserable sounds from the +groanin' instrument? Did home, love, happiness sound out to her, +out of them hombly strains? I'd have gin a cent to know. + +And I'd have gin a cent quick to know if the tread -- tread -- +tread of the crowd goin' past her day after day, hour after hour, +seems to her like the trample of Time a marchin' on. Did she hear +in 'em the footsteps of child, or lover, or friend, a steppin' +away from her, and youth and happiness, and hope, a stiddy goin' +away from her? + +Did she ever listen through the constant sound of them steps, +listen to hear the tread of them feet that she must know wuz a +comin' nigh to her -- the icy feet that will approach us, if their +way leads over rocks or roses? + +Did she hate to hear them steps a comin' nearer to her, or did she +strain her ears to hear 'em, to welcome 'em? I thought like as +not she did. For thinkses I to myself, and couldn't help it, if +she is a Christian she must be glad to change that old accordeun +for a harp of any size or shape. For mournfuller and more +melancholy sounds than her voice and that instrument made I never +hearn, nor ever expect to hear, and thin. + +Poor, old, hombly critter, I gin her quite a lot of change one +day, and she braced up and sung and drawed out faster than ever, +and thinner. Though I'd have gladly hearn her stop. + +When I come up out of my revery, I see Ardelia lookin' at her +stiddy and kind a sot. And I mistrusted trouble wuz ahead on me, +and I hurried Josiah down the street. Ardelia a sayin' she had +got to turn the corner, to go to another place for her 3d cousin. + +Jest as we wuz a crossin' a street my companion drawed my +attention to a sign that wuz jest overhead, and sez lie, "That +means me, I'm spoke of right out, and hung up overhead." + +And sez I, "What do you mean?" + +Sez he, "Read it -- 'The First Man-I-Cure Of The Day.' That's me, +Samantha; I haint a doubt of it. And I s'pose I ort to go in and +be cured. I s'pose probably it will be expected of me, that I +should go in, and let him look at my corns." + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen, I've heerd you talk time and agin aginst big +feelin' folks, and here you be a talkin' it right to yourself, and +callin' yourself the first man of the day." + +"Wall," sez he firmly, "I believe it, and I believe you do, and +you'd own up to it, if you wuzn't so aggravatin'." + +"Wall, sez I mildly, "I do think you are the first in some things, +though what them things are, I would be fur from wantin' to tell +you. But," I continued on, "I don't see you should think that +means you. Saratoga is full of men, and most probable every man +of 'em thinks it means him." + +"Wall," sez he, "I don't think it means me, I know it. And I +s'pose," he continued dreamily, "they'd cure me, and not charge a +cent." + +"Wall," sez I, "wait till another time, Josiah Allen." And jest +at this minute, right down under our feet, we see the word "Pray," +in big letters scraped right out in stun. And Josiah sez, "I +wonder if the dumb fools think anybody is goin to kneel down right +here in the street, and be run over. Why a man would be knocked +over a dozen times, before he got through one prayer, Now I lay me +down to sleep, or anything." + +"Wall," sez I, mildly, "I don't think that would be a very +suitable prayer under the circumstances. It haint expected that +you'd lay down here for a nap -- howsumever," sez I reesunably +"their puttin' the word there shows what good streaks the folks +here have, and I don't want you to make light on't, and if you +don't want to act like a perfect backslider you'll ceese usin' +such profane language on sech a solemn subject." + +Wall, we went into a good lookin'store and I wuz jest a lookin' at +some lawn and a wonderin' how many yards I should want, when who +should come in but Miss Flamm to get a rooch for her neck. + +And she told me that I didn't need any lawn, and that it wuz a +Garden party, and folks dressed in anything they wuz a mind to, +though sez she, "A good many go in full dress." + +"Wall," sez I calmly, "I have got one." And she told me to come +in good season. + +That afternoon, Josiah a bein' out for a walk, I took out of my +trunk a dress that Alminy Hagidon had made for me out of a very +full pattern I had got of a peddler, and wanted it all put in, +so's it would fade all alike, for I mistrusted it wouldn't wash. +It wuz gethered-in full round the waist, and the sleeves wuz set +in full, and the waist wuz kinder full before, and it had a deep +high ruffle gathered-in full round the neck. It wuz a very full +dress, though I haint proud, and never wuz called so. Yet anybody +duz take a modest pleasure in bein' equal to any occasion and +comin' up nobly to a emergency. And I own that I did say to +myself, as I pulled out the gethers in front, "Wall, there may be +full dresses there to-night, but there will be none fuller than +mine." + +And I wuz glad that Alminy had made it jest as she had. She had +made it a little fuller than even I had laid out to have it, for +she mistrusted it would shrink in washin'. It wuz a very full +dress. It wuz cambrick dark chocolate, with a set flower of a +kind of a cinnamon brown and yellow, it wuz bran new and looked +well. + +Wall, I had got it on, and wuz contemplatin' its fullness with +complacency and a hand-glass, a seein' how nobly it stood out +behind, and how full it wuz, when Josiah Allen came in. I had +talked it over with him, before he went out -- and he wuz as +tickled as I wuz, and tickleder, to think I had got jest the right +dress for the occasion. But he sez to me the first thing -- "You +are all wrong, Samantha, full dress means low neck and short +sleeves." + +Sez I, "I know better!" + +Sez he, "It duz." + +Sez I, "Somebody has been a foolin' you, Josiah Allen! There +ain't no sense in it. Do you s'pose folks would call a dress +full, when there wuzn't more'n half a waist and sleeves to it. +I'd try to use a little judgment, Josiah Allen! " + +But he contended that he wuz in the right on't. And he took up +his best vest that lay on the bed, and sot down, and took out his +jack knife and went a rippin' open one of the shoulders, and sez +I, "What are you doin', Josiah Allen?" + +"Why, you can do as you are a mind to, Samantha Allen," sez he. +"But I shall go fashionable, I shall go in full dress." + +Sez I, "Josiah Allen do you look me in the face and say you are a +goin' in a low neck vest, and everything, to that party to-night?" + +"Yes, mom, I be. I am bound to be fashionable." And he went to +rollin' up his shirt sleeves and turnin' in the neck of his shirt, +in a manner that wuz perfectly immodest. + +I turned my head away instinctively, for I felt that my cheek wuz +a gettin' as red as blood, partly through delicacy and partly +through righteous anger. Sez I, "Josiah Allen, be you a +calculatin' to go there right out in public before men and wimmen, +a showin' your bare bosom to a crowd? Where is your modesty, +Josiah Allen? Where is your decency?" + +Sez he firmly, "I keep 'em where all the rest do, who go in full +dress." + +I sot right down in a chair and sez I, "Wall there is one thing +certain; if you go in that condition, you will go alone. Why," +sez I, "to home, if Tirzah Ann, your own daughter, had ketched you +in that perdickerment, a rubbin' on linement or anything, you +would have jumped and covered yourself up, quicker'n a flash, and +likeways me, before Thomas Jefferson. And now you lay out to go +in that way before young girls, and old ones, and men and wimmen, +and want me to foller on after your example. What in the world +are you a thinkin' on, Josiah Allen?" + +"Why I'm a thinkin, on full dress," sez be in a pert tone, a +kinder turnin' himself before the glass, where he could get a good +view of his bones. His thin neck wuzn't much more than bones, +anyway, and so I told him. And I asked him if he could see any +beauty in it, and sez I, "Who wants to look at our old bare necks, +Josiah Allen? And if there wuzn't any other powerful reeson of +modesty and decency in it, you'd ketch your death cold, Josiah +Allen, and be laid up with the newmoan. You know you would," sez +I, "you are actin' like a luny, Josiah Allen." + +"It is you that are actin' like a luny," sez he bitterly. "I +never propose anything of a high fashionable kind but what you +want to break it up. Why, dumb it all, you know as well as I do, +that men haint called as modest as wimmen anyway. And if they +have the name, why shouldn't they have the game? Why shouldn't +they go round half dressed as well as wimmen do? And they are as +strong agin; if there is any danger to health in it they are +better able to stand it. But," sez he, in the same bitter axents, +"you always try to break up all my efforts at high life and +fashion. I presume you won't waltz to-night, nor want me to." + +I groaned several times in spite of myself, and sithed, "Waltz!" +sez I in awful axents. "A classleader! and a grandfather! and +talkin' about waltzin'!" + +Sez Josiah, "Men older than me waltz, and foller it up. Put their +arms right round the prettiest girls in the room, hug 'em, and +swing 'em right round" -- sez he kinder spoony like. + +I said nothin' at them fearful words, only my groans and sithes +became deeper and more voyalent. And in a minute I see through +the fingers with which I had nearly covered my face, that he wuz a +pullin' down his shirt sleeves and a puttin' his jack knife in his +pocket. + +That man loves me. And love sways him round often times when +reesun and sound argument are powerless. Now, the sound reesun of +the case didn't move him, such as the indelicacy of makin' a +exhibition of one's self in a way that would, if displayed in a +heathen, be a call for missionarys to convert 'em, and that makes +men blush when they see it in a Christian woman. + +The sound reason of its bein' the fruitful cause of disease and +death, through the senseless exposure. + +The sound reason of the worse than folly of old and middle-aged +folks thinkin' that the exhibition is a pretty one when it haint. + +The sound reason of its bein' inconsistent for a woman to allow +the familiarity of a man and a stranger, a walkin' up and puttin' +his arm round her, and huggin' her up to him as clost as he can; +that act, that a woman would resent as a deadly insult and her +incensed relatives avenge with the sword, if it occurred in any +other place than the ball-room and at the sound of the fiddle. +The utter inconsistency of her meetin' it with smiles, and making +frantic efforts to get more such affronts than any other woman +present -- her male relatives a lookin' proudly on. + +The inconsistency of a man's bein' not only held guiltless but +applauded for doin' what, if it took place in the street, or +church, would make him outlawed, for where is there a lot of manly +men who would look on calmly, and see a sweet young girl insulted +by a man's ketchin' hold of her and embracin' of her tightly for +half an hour, -- why, he would be turned out of his club and +outlawed from Christian homes if it took place in silence, but yet +the sound of a fiddle makes it all right. + +And I sez to myself mildly, as I sot there, "Is it that men and +wimmen lose their senses, or is there a sacredness in the strains +of that fiddle, that makes immodesty modest, indecency decent, and +immorality moral?" And agin I sithe heavy and gin 3 deep groans. +And I see Josiah gin in. All the sound reasons weighed as nothin' +with him, but 2 or 3 groans, and a few sithes settled the matter. +Truly Love is a mighty conqueror. + +And anon Josiah spoke and sez, "Wall, I s'pose I can gin it all +up, if you feel so about it, but we shall act like fools, +Samantha, and look like 'em." + +Sez I sternly, "Better be fools than naves, Josiah Allen! if we +have got to be one or the other, but we haint. We are a standin' +on firm ground, Josiah Allen," sez I. "The platform made of the +boards of consistency, and common sense, and decency, is one that +will never break down and let you through it, into gulfs and +abysses. And on that platform we will both stand to-night, dear +Josiah." + +I think it is always best when a pardner has gin in and you have +had a triumph of principle, to be bland; blander than common to +him. I always love at such times to round my words to him with a +sweet affectionateness of mean. I love to, and he loves it. + +We sot out in good season for the Garden party. And it wuz indeed +a sight to behold! But I did not at that first minute have a +chance to sense it, for Miss Flamm sent her hired girl out to ask +me to come to her room for a few minutes. Miss Flamm's house is a +undergoin' repairs for a few weeks, sunthin' had gin out in the +water works, so she and her hired girl have been to this tarven +for the time bein'. The hired girl got us some good seats and +tellin' Josiah to keep one on 'em for me, I follered the girl, or +"maid," as Miss Flamm calls her. But good land! if she is a old +maid, I don't see where the young ones be. + +Miss Flamm had sent for me, so she said, to see if I wanted to +ride out the next day, and what time would be the most convenient +to me, and also, to see how I liked her dress. She didn't know as +she should see me down below, in the crowd, and she wanted me to +see it. (Miss Flamm uses me dretful well, but I s'pose 2/3ds of +it, is on Thomas J's account. Some folks think she is goin' to +have another lawsuit, and I am glad enough to have him convey her +lawsuits, for they are good, honerable ones, and she pays him +splendid for carryin' 'em.) + +Wall, she had her skirts all on when I went in, all a foamin' and +a shinin', down onto the carpet, in a glitterin' pile of pink +satin and white lace and posys. Gorgus enough for a princess. + +And I didn't mind it much, bein' only females present, if she wuz +exposin' of herself a good deal. I kinder blushed a little as I +looked at her, and kep' my eyes down on her skirts all I could, +and thinkses I to myself, -- "What if G. Washington should come +in? I shouldn't know which way to look." But then the very next +minute, I says to myself, "Of course he won't be in till she gets +her waist on. I'm a borrowin' trouble for nothin'." + +At last Miss Flamm spoke and says she, as she kinder craned +herself before the glass, a lookin' at her back (most the hull +length on it bare, as I am a livin' creeter); and says she,," How +do you like my dress?" + +"Oh," says I, wantin' to make myself agreeable (both on account of +principle, and the lawsuit), "the skirts are beautiful but I can't +judge how the hull dress looks, you know, till you get your waist +on." + +"My waist?" says she. + +"Yes," says I. + +"I have got it on," says she. + +"Where is it?" says I, a lookin' at her closer through my specks, +"Where is the waist?" + +"Here," says she, a pintin' to a pink belt ribbon, and a string of +beads over each shoulder. + +Says I, "Miss Flamm, do you call that a waist?" + +"Yes," says she, and she balanced herself on her little pink +tottlin' slippers. She couldn't walk in 'em a good honerable walk +to save her life. How could she, with the instep not over two +inches acrost, and the heels right under the middle of her foot, +more'n a finger high? Good land, they wuz enuff to lame a Injun +savage, and curb him in. But she sort o' balanced herself unto +'em, the best she could, and put her hands round her waist -- it +wuzn't much bigger than a pipe-stem, and sort o' bulgin' out both +ways, above and below, some like a string tied tight round a +piller, - and says she complacently, "I don't believe there will +be a dress shown to-night more stylish and beautiful than mine." + +Says I, "Do you tell me, Miss Flamm, that you are a goin' down +into that crowd of promiscus men and women, with nothin' but them +strings on to cover you?" Says I, "Do you tell me that, and you a +perfesser and a Christian?" + +"Yes," says she, "I paid 300 dollars for this dress, and it haint +likely I am goin' to miss the chance of showin' it off to the +other wimmen who will envy me the possession of it. To be sure," +says she, "it is a little lower than Americans usually wear. But +in fashion, as in anything else, somebody has got to go ahead. +This is the very heighth of fashion," says she. + +Says I in witherin' and burnin' skorn, "It is the heighth of +immodesty." + +And I jest turned my back right ont' her, and sailed out of the +room. I wuzn't a a goin' to stand that, lawsuit or no lawsuit. I +wuz all worked up in my mind, and by the side of myself, and I +didn't get over it for some time, neither. + +Wall, I found my companion seated in that comfertable place, and a +keepin' my chair for me, and so I sot down by him, and truly we +sot still, and see the glory, and the magnificence on every side +on us. There wuz 3 piazzas about as long as from our house to +Jonesville, or from Jonesville to Loontown, all filled with folks +magnificently dressed, and a big garden layin' between 'em about +as big as from our house to Miss Gowdey's, and so round crossways +to Alminy Hagidone's brother's, and back agin'. It wuz full as +fur as that, and you know well that that is a great distance. + +There wuz some big noble trees, all twinklin' full of lights, of +every coler, and rows of shinin' lights, criss-crossed every way, +or that is, every beautiful way, from the high ornimental pillers +of the immense house, that loomed up in the distance round us on +every side, same as the mountains loom up round Loontown. + +There wuz a big platform built in the middle of the garden, with +sweet music discoursin' from it the most enchantin' strains. And +the fountains wuz sprayin' out the most beautiful colers you ever +see in your life, and fallin' down in pink, and yellow, and gold, +and green, and amber, and silver water; sparklin' down onto the +green beautiful ferns and flowers that loved to grow round the big +marble basin which shone white, risin' out of the green velvet of +the grass. + +Josiah looked at that water, and sez he, "Samantha, I'd love to +get some of that water to pass round evenin's when we have +company." Sez he, "It would look so dressy and fashionable to +pass round pink water, or light blue, or light yeller. How it +would make Uncle Nate Gowdey open his eyes. I believe I shall buy +some bottles of it, Samantha, to take home. What do you say? I +don't suppose it would cost such a dretful sight, do you?" + +Sez he, "I s'pose all they have to do is to put pumps down into a +pink spring, or a yeller one, as the case may be, and pump. And I +would be willin' to pump it up myself, if it would come cheaper." + +But my companion soon forgot to follow up the theme in lookin' +about him onto the magnificent, seen, and a seein' the throngs of +men and wimmen growin' more and more denser, and every crowd on +'em that swept by us, and round us, and before us, a growin' more +gorgus in dress, or so it seemed to us. Gemms of every gorgus +coler under the heavens and some jest the coler of the heavens +when it is blue and shinin' or when it is purplish dark in the +night time, or when it is full of white fleecy clouds, or when it +is a shinin' with stars. + +Why, one woman had so many diamonds on that she had a detective +follerin' her all round wherever she went. She wuz a blaze of +splendor and so wuz lots of 'em, though like the stars, they +differed from each other in glory. + +But whatever coler their gowns wuz, in one thing they wuz most all +alike -- most all of 'em had waists all drawed in tight, but a +bulgin' out on each side, more or less as the case might be. Why +some of them waists wuzn't much bigger than pipe's tails and so I +told Josiah. + +And he whispered back to me, and sez he, "I wonder if them wimmen +with wasp waists, think that we men like the looks on 'em. They +make a dumb mistake if they do. Why," sez he, "we men know what +they be; we know they are nothin' but crushed bones and flesh." +Sez he, "I could make my own waist look jest like 'em, if I should +take a rope and strap myself down." + +"Wall," sez I, in agitated axents, "don't you try to go into no +such enterprise, Josiah Allen." + +I remembered the eppisode of the afternoon, and I sez in anxins +axents, and affectionate, "Besides not lookin' well, it is +dangerous, awful dangerous. And how I should blush," sez I, "if I +wuz to see you with a leather strap or a rope round your waist +under your coat, a drawin' you in ; a changin' your good honerable +shape. And God made men's and wimmen's waists jest alike in the +first place, and it is jest as smart for men to deform themselves +in that way as it is for wimmen. But oh, the agony of my soul if +I should see you a tryin' to disfigure yourself in that way." + +"You needn't be afraid, Samantha," sez he, "I am dressy, and +always wuz, but I haint such a fool as that, as to kill myself in +perfect agony, for fashion." + +I didn't say nothin' but instinctively I looked down at his feet, +"Oh, you needn't look at my feet, Samantha, feet are very +different from the heart, and lungs, and such. You can squeeze +your feet down, and not hurt much moren the flesh and bones. But +you are a destroyin' the very seat of life when you draw your +waist in as them wimmen do." + +"I know it," sez I, "but I wouldn't torture myself in any way if I +wuz in your place." + +"I don't lay out to," sez he. "I haint a goin' to wear corsets, +it haint at all probable I shall, though I am better able to stand +it, than wimmen be." + +"I know that," sez I. "I know men are stronger and better able to +bear the strain of bein' drawed in and tapered." I am reesonable, +and will ever speak truthful and honest, and this I couldn't deny +and didn't try to. + +"Wall, dumb it, what makes men stronger?" sez he. + +"Why," sez I, "I s'pose one great thing is their dressin' +comfortable." + +"Wall, I am glad you know enough to know it," sez he. "Why," sez +he, "jest imagine a man tyin' a rope round his waist, round and +round; or worse yet, take strong steel, and whalebones, and bind +and choke himself down with 'em, and tottlin' himself up on high +heel slippers, the high heels comin' right up in the ball of his +foot -- and then havin' heavy skirts a holdin' him down, tied back +tight round his knees and draggin' along on the ground at his feet +-- imagine me in that perdickerment, Samantha." + +I shuddered, and sez I, "Don't bring up no such seen to harrow up +my nerve." Sez I, "You know I couldn't stand it, to see you a +facin' life and its solemn responsibilities in that condition. It +would kill me to witness your sufferin'," sez I. And agin' I +shuddered, and agin I sithed. + +And he sez, "Wall, it is jest as reasonable for a man to do it as +for a woman; it is far worse and more dangerous for a woman than a +man." + +"I know it," sez I, between my sithes. "I know it, but I can't, I +can't stand it, to have you go into it." + +"Wall, you needn't worry, Samantha, I haint a fool. You won't +ketch men a goin' into any such performances as this, they know +too much." And then he resumed on in a lighter agent, to get my +mind still further off from his danger, for I wuz still a sithin', +frequent and deep. + +Sez he, as he looked down and see some wimmen a passin' below; sez +hey "I never see such a sight in my life, a man can see more here +in one evenin' than he can in a life time at Jonesville." + +"That is so, Josiah," sez I, "you can." And I felt every word I +said, for at that very minute a lady, or rather a female woman, +passed with a dress on so low in the neck that I instinctively +turned away my head, and when I looked round agin, a deep blush +wuz mantlin' the cheeks of Josiah Allen, a flushin' up his face, +clear up into his bald head. + +I don't believe I had ever been prouder of Josiah Allen, than I +wuz at that minute. That blush spoke plainer than words could, of +the purity and soundness of my pardner's morals. If the whole +nation had stood up in front of me at that time, and told me his +morals wuz a tottlin' I would have scorned the suggestion. No, +that blush telegraphed to me right from his soul, the sweet +tidin's of his modesty and worth. + +And I couldn't refrain from sayin' in encouragin', happy axents, +"Haint you glad now, Josiah Allen, that you listened to your +pardner; haint you glad that you haint a goin' round in a low +necked coat and vest, a callin' up the blush of skern and outraged +modesty to the cheeks 'of noble and modest men?" + +"Yes," sez he, graspin' holt of my hand in the warmth of his +gratitude, for he see what I had kep' him from. "Yes, you wuz in +the right on't, Samantha. I see the awfulness of the peril from +which you rescued of me. But never," sez he, a lookin' down +agin over the railin', onto some more wimmen a passin' beneath, +"never did I see what I have seen here to-night. Not," sez he +dreemily, "sense I wuz a baby." + +"Wall," sez I, "don't try to look, Josiah; turn your eyes away." + +And I believe he did try to -- though such is the fascination of a +known danger in front of you, that it is hard to keep yourself +from contemplatin' of it. But he tried to. And he tried to not +look at the waltzin' no more than he could help, and I did too. +But in spite of himself he had to see how clost the young girls +wuz held; how warmly the young men embraced 'em. And as he looked +on, agin I see the hot blush of shame mantillied Josiah's cheeks, +and again he sez to me in almost warm axents, "I realize what you +have rescued me from, Samantha." + +And I sez, "You couldn't have looked Elder Minkley in the face, +could you? if you had gone into that shameful diversion." + +"No, I couldn't, nor into yourn nuther. I couldn't have looked +nobody in the face, if I had gone on and imposed on any young girl +as they are a doin', and insulted of her. Why," sez he, "if it +wuz my Tirzah Ann that them, men wuz a embracin', and huggin', and +switchin' her round, as if they didn't have no respect for her at +all, -- why, if it wuz Tirzah Ann, I would tear 'em 'em from lim." + +And he looked capable on't. He looked almost sublime (though +small). And I hurried him away from the seen, for I didn't know +what would ensue and foller on, if I let him linger there longer. +He looked as firm and warlike as one of our bantam fowls, a male +one, when hawks are a hoverin' over the females of the flock. And +when I say Bantam I say it with no disrespect to Josiah Allen. +Bantams are noble, and warlike fowls, though small boneded. + +I got one more glimps of Miss Flamm jest as we left the tarven. +She wuz a standin' up in the parlor, with a tall man a standin' up +in front of her a talkin'. He seemed to be biddin' of her +good-bye, for he had holt of her hand, and be wuz a sayin' as we +went by 'em, sez he, "I am sorry not to see more of you." + +"Good land!" thinkses I, "what can the man be a thinkin' on? the +mean, miserable creeter! If there wuz ever a deadly insult gin to +a woman, then wuz the time it wuz gin. Good land! good land!" + +I don't know whether Miss Flamm resented it, or not, for I hurried +Josiah along. I didn't want to expose him to no sich sights, +good, innocent old creeter. So I kep' him up on a pretty good jog +till I got him home. + + + + +XVII. + +A TRIP TO SCHUYLERVILLE. + + +It wuz a lovely mornin' when my companion and me sot out to visit +Schuylerville to see the monument that is stood up there in honor +of the Battle of Saratoga, one of 7 great decisive battles of the +world. + +Wall, the cars rolled on peacefully, though screechin' occasionally, +for, as the poet says, "It is their nater to," and rolled us away +from Saratoga. And at first there wuzn't nothin' particularly +insperin' in the looks of the landscape, or ruther woodscape. It +wuz mostly woods and rather hombly woods too, kinder flat lookin'. +But pretty soon the scenery became beautiful and impressive. The +rollin' hills rolled down and up in great billowy masses of green +and pale blue, accordin' as they wuz fur or near, and we went by +shinin' water, and a glowin' landscape, and pretty houses, and +fields of grain and corn, etc., etc. And anon we reached a place +where "Victory Mills" wuz printed up high, in big letters. When +Josiah see this, he sez, "Haint that neighborly and friendly in +Victory to come over here and put up a mill? That shows, Samantha," +sez he, "that the old hardness of the Revolution is entirely done +away with." + +He wuz jest full of Revolutionary thoughts that mornin', Josiah +Allen wuz. And so wuz I too, but my strength of mind is such, +that I reined 'em in and didn't let 'em run away with me. And I +told him that it didn't mean that. Sez I, "The Widder Albert +wouldn't come over here and go to millin', she nor none of her +family." + +"But," sez he, "the name must mean sunthin'. Do you s'pose it is +where folks get the victory over things? If it is, I'd give a +dollar bill to get a grist ground out here, and," sez he, in a +sort of a coaxin' tone, "le's stop and get some victory, Samantha." + +And I told him, that I guessed when he got a victory over the +world, the flesh, or the -- David, he would have to work for it, +he wouldn't get it ground out for him. But anon, he cast his eyes +on sunthin' else and so forgot to muse on this any further. It +wuz a fair seen. + +Anon, a big manufactory, as big as the hull side of Jonesville +almost, loomed up by the side of us. And anon, the fair, the +beautiful country spread itself out before our vision. While fur, +fur away the pale blue mountains peeked up over the green ones, to +see if they too could see the monument riz up to our National +Liberty. It belonged to them, jest as much as to the hill it wuz +a standin' on, it belongs to the hull liberty-lovin' world. + +Wall, the cars stopped in a pretty little village, a clean, +pleasant little place as I ever see, or want to see. And Josiah +and me wended our way up the broad roomy street, up to where the +monument seemed to sort a beegon to us to come. And when we got +up to it; we see it wuz a sight, a sight to behold. + +The curius thing on't wuz, it kep a growin' bigger and bigger all +the time we wuz approachin' it, till, as we stood at its base, it +seemed to tower up into the very skies. + +There wuz some flights of stun steps a leadin' up to some doors in +the side on't. And we went inside on't after we had gin a good +look at the outside. But it took us some time to get through +gazin' at the outside on't. + +Way up over our heads wuz some sort a recesses, some like the +recess in my spare bed-room, only higher and narrower, and kinder +nobler lookin'. And standin' up in the first one, a lookin' +stiddy through storm and shine at the North star, stood General +Gates, bigger than life considerable, but none too big; for his +deeds and the deeds of all of our old 4 fathers stand out now and +seem a good deal bigger than life. Yes, take 'em in all their +consequences, a sight bigger. + +Wall, there he stands, a leanin' on his sword. He'll be ready +when the enemy comes, no danger but what he will. + +On the east side, is General Schuyler a horsback, ready to dash +forward against the foe, impetuous, ardent, gallant. But oh! the +perils and dangers that obstruct his pathway; thick underbrush and +high, tall trees stand up round him that he seemin'ly can't get +through. + +But his gallant soldiers are a helpin' him onward, they are a +cuttin' down the trees so's he can get through 'em and dash at the +enemy. You see as you look on him that he will get through it +all. No envy, nor detraction, nor jealousy, no such low +underbrush full of crawlin' reptiles, nor no high solid trees, no +danger of any sort can keep him back. His big brave, generous +heart is sot on helpin' his country, he'll do it. + +On the south side, is the saddest sight that a patriotic American +can see. On a plain slab stun, lookin' a good deal like a +permanent grave-stun, sot up high there, for Americans to weep +over forever, bitter tears of shames, is the name, "Arnold." + +He wuz a brave soldier; his name ort to be there; it is all right +to have it there and jest where it is, on a gravestun. All +through the centuries it will stand there, a name carved by the +hand of cupidity, selfishness, and treachery. + +On the west side, General Morgan is standin' up with his hands +over his eyes; lookin' away into the sunset. He looked jest like +that when he wuz a lookin' after prowlin' red skins and red coats; +when the sun wuz under dark clouds, and the day wuz dark 100 years +ago. + +But now, all he has to do is to stand up there and look off into +the glowin' heavens, a watchin' the golden light of the sun of +Liberty a rollin' on westward. He holds his hand over his eyes; +its rays most blind him, he is most lost a thinkin' how fur, how +fur them rays are a spreadin', and a glowin',way, way off, Morgan +is a lookin' onto our future, and it dazzles him. Its rays +stretch off into other lands; they strike dark places; they burn! +they glow! they shine! they light up the world! + +Hold up your head, brave old General, and your loyal steadfast +eyes. You helped to strike that light. Its radience half-frights +you. It is so heavenly bright, its rays, may well dazzle you. +Brown old soldiers, I love to think of you always a standin' up +there, lifted high up by a grateful Nation, a lookin' off over all +the world, a lookin' off towards the glowin' west, toward our +glorious future. + +On the inside too, it wuz a noble seen. After you rose up the +steps and went inside, you found yourself in a middlin' big room +all surrounded by figures in what they called Alto Relief, or +sunthin' to that effect. I don't know what Alto they meant. I +don't know nobody by that name, nor I don't know how they relieved +him. But I s'pose Alto when he wuz there wuz relieved to think +that the figures wuz all so noble and impressive. Mebby he had +been afraid they wouldn't suit him and the nation. But they did, +they must have. He must have been hard to suit, Alto must, if he +wuzn't relieved, and pleased with these. + +On one side wuz George the 3d of England, in his magnificent +palace, all dressed up in velvet and lace, surrounded by his slick +drestup nobles, and all of 'em a sittin' there soft and warm, in +the lap of Luxury, a makin' laws to bind the strugglin' colonies. + +And right acrost from that, wuz a picture of them Colonists, cold +and hungry, a havin' a Rally for Freedom, and a settin' up a Town +meetin! right amongst the trees, and under-brush that hedged 'em +all in and tripped 'em up at every step; and savages a hidin' +behind the trees, and fears of old England, and dread of a +hazerdous unknown future, a hantin' and cloudin' every glimpse of +sky that came down on 'em through the trees. But they looked +earnest and good, them old 4 fathers did, and the Town meetin' +looked determined, and firm principled as ever a Town meetin' +looked on the face of the earth. + +Then there wuz some of the women of the court, fine ladies, all +silk, and ribbons, and embroideries, and paint, and powder, a +leanin' back in their cushioned arm-chairs, a wantin' to have the +colonies taxed still further so's to have more money to buy lace +with and artificial flowers. And right acrost from 'em wuz some +of our old 4 mothers, in a rude, log hut, not strong enough to +keep out the cold, or the Injuns. + +One wuz a cardin' wools, one of 'em wuz a spinnin' 'em, a tryin' +to make clothes to cover the starved, half-naked old 4 fathers who +wuz a tramplin' round in the snow with bare feet and shiverin' +lims. And one of 'em had a gun in her hand. She had smuggled the +children all in behind her and she wuz a lookin' out for the foe. +These wimmen hadn't no ribbons on, no, fur from it. + +And then there wuz General Schuyler a fellin' trees to obstruct +the march of the British army. And Miss Schuyler a settin' fire +to a field of wheat rather than have it help the enemy of her +country. Brave old 4 mother, worthy pardner of a grand man, she +wuz a takin' her life in her hand and a destroyin' her own +property for the sake of the cause she loved. A emblem of the way +men and women sot fire to their own hopes, their own happiness, +and burnt 'em up on the altar of the land we love. + +And there wuz some British wimmen a follerin' their husbands +through the perils of danger and death, likely old 4 mothers they +wuz, and thought jest as much of their pardners as I do of my +Josiah. I could see that plain. And could see it a shinin' +still plainer in another one of the pictures -- Lady Aukland a +goin' over the Hudson in a little canoe with the waves a dashin' +up high round her, to get to the sick bed of her companion. The +white flag of truce wuz a wavin' over her head and in her heart +wuz a shinin' the clear white light of a woman's deathless +devotion. Oh! there wuz likely wimmen amongst the British, I +haint a doubt of it, and men too. + +And then we clim a long flight of stairs and we see some more +pictures, all round that room. Alto relieved agin, or he must +have been relieved, and happified to see 'em, they wuz so +impressive. I myself had from 25 to 30 emotions a minute while I +stood a lookin' at em -- big lofty emotions too. + +There waz Jennie McCrea a bein' dragged offen her horse, and +killed by savages. A dreadful sight -- a woman settin' out +light-hearted toward happiness and goin' to meet a fearful doom. +Dreadful sight that has come down through the centuries, and +happens over and over agin amongst female wimmen. But here it wuz +fearful impressive for the savages that destroyed her wuz in +livin' form, they haint always materialized. + +Yes, it wuz a awful seen. And jest beyond it, wuz Burgoyne a +scoldin' the savages for the cruelty of the deed. Curius, haint +it? How the acts and deeds of a man that he sets to goin', when +they have come to full fruition skare him most to death, horrify +him by the sight. I'll bet Burgoyne felt bad enough, a lookin' on +her dead body, if it wuz his doin's in the first place, in lettin' +loose such ignerance and savagery onto a strugglin' people. + +Yes, Mr. Burgoyne felt bad and ashamed, I haint a doubt of it. +His poet soul could suffer as well as enjoy -- and then I didn't +feel like sayin' too much aginst Mr. Burgoyne, havin' meditated so +lately in the treachery of Arnold, one of our own men doin' a act +that ort to keep us sort a humble-minded to this day. + +And then there wuz the killin' and buryin' of Frazier both +impressive. He wuz a gallant officer and a brave man. And then +there wuz General Schuyler (a good creeter) a turnin' over his +command to Gates. And I methought to myself as I looked on it, +that human nater wuz jest about the same then; it capered jest +about as it duz now in public affairs and offices. Then there wuz +the surrender of Burgoyne to Gates. A sight impressive enough to +furnish one with stiddy emotions for weeks and weeks. A thinkin' +of all he surrendered to him that day, and all that wuz took. + +The monument is dretful high. Up, up, up, it soars as if it wuz +bound to reach up into the very heavens, and carry up there these +idees of ourn about Free Rights, and National Liberty. It don't +go clear up, though. I wish it did. If it had, I should have +gone up the high ladder clear to the top. But I desisted from the +enterprise for 2 reasons, one wuz, that it didn't go, as I say, +clear up, and the other wuz that the stairs wuzn't finished. + +Josiah proposed that he should go up as he clim up our well, with +one foot on each side on't. He said he wuz tempted to, for he +wanted dretfully to look out of them windows on the top. And he +said it would probable be expected of him. And I told him that I +guessed that the monument wouldn't feel hurt if he didn't go up; I +guessed it would stand it. I discouraged the enterprise. + +And anon we went down out of the monument, and crossed over to the +good-lookin' house where the man lives who takes care of the +monument, and shows off its good traits, a kind of a guardian to +it. And we got a first-rate dinner there, though such is not +their practice. And then he took us in a likely buggy with 2 +seats, and a horse to draw it, and we sot out to see what the +march of 100 years has left us of the doin's of them days. + +Time has trampled out a good many of 'em, but we found some. We +found the old Schuyler mansion, a settin' back amongst the trees, +with the old knocker on it, that had been pulled by so many a old +4 father, carryin' tidin's of disappointment, and hope, and +triumph, and encouragement, and everything. We went over the +threshold wore down by the steps that had fell there for a hundred +years, some light, some heavy steps. + +We went into the clean, good-lookin' old kitchen, with the +platters, and shinin' dressers and trays; the old-fashioned +settee, half-table and half-seat. And we see the cup General +Washington drinked tea out of, good old creeter. I hope the water +biled and it wuz good tea, and most probable it wuz. And we see +lots of arms that had been carried in the war, and cannon balls, +and shells, and tommy-hawks, and hatchets, and arrows, and etc., +etc. And down in one room all full of other curiosities and +relicts, wuz the skull of a traitor. I should judge from the +looks on't that besides bein' mean, he wuz a hombly man. Somebody +said folks had made efforts to steal it. But Josiah whispered to +me, that there wuzn't no danger from him, for he would rather be +shet right up in the Tombs than to own it, in any way. + +And I felt some like him. Some of his teeth had been stole, so +they said. Good land! what did they want with his teeth! But it +wuz a dretful interestin' spot. And I thought as I went through +the big square, roomy rooms that I wouldn't swap this good old +house for dozens of Queen Anns, or any other of the fashionable, +furbelowed houses of to-day. The orniments of this house wuz more +on the inside, and I couldn't help thinkin' that this house, +compared with the modern ornimental cottages, wuz a good deal like +one of our good old-fashioned foremothers in her plain gown, +compared with some of the grandma's of to-day, all paint, and +furbelows, and false hair. + +The old 4 mothers orniments wuz on the inside, and the others wuz +more up on the roof, scalloped off and gingerbreaded, and +criss-crossed. + +The old house wuz full of rooms fixed off beautiful. It wuz quite +a treat to walk throngh'em. But the old fireplaces, and mantle +tray shelves spoke to our hearts of the generations that had poked +them fires, and leaned up against them mantle trays. They went +ahead on us through the old rooms; I couldn't see 'em, but I felt +their presence, as I follered 'em over the old thresholts their +feet had worn down a hundred years ago. Their feet didn't make no +sound, their petticoats and short gowns didn't rustle against the +old door ways and stair cases. + +The dear old grandpas in their embroidered coats, didn't cast no +shadow as they crossed the sunshine that came in through the +old-fashioned window panes. No, but with my mind's eye (the best +eye I have got, and one that don't wear specks) I see 'em, and I +follerd 'em down the narrow, steep stair case, and out into the +broad light of 4 P. M., 1886. + +Anon, or shortly after, we drove up on a corner of the street jest +above where the Fish creek empties into the Hudson, and there, +right on a tall high brick block, wuz a tablet, showin' that a +tree once stood jest there, under which Burgoyne surrendered. And +agin, when I thought of all that he surrendered that day, and all +that America and the world gained, my emotions riz up so powerful, +that they wuzn't quelled down a mite, by seein' right on the other +side of the house wrote down these words, "Drugs, Oils, etc." + +No, oil couldn't smooth 'em down, nor drugs drug 'em; they wuz too +powerful. And they lasted jest as soarin' and eloquent as ever +till we turned down a cross street, and arrove at the place, jest +the identical spot where the British stacked their arms (and +stacked all their pride, and their ambitious hopes with 'em). It +made a high pile. + +Wall, from there we went up to a house on a hill, where poor +Baroness Riedesel hid with her three little children, amongst the +wounded and dyin' officers of the British army, and stayed there +three days and three nights, while shots and shells wuz a +bombardin' the little house -- and not knowin' but some of the +shots had gone through her lover husband's heart, before they +struck the low ruff over her head. + +What do you s'pose she wuz a thinkin' on as she lay hid in that +suller all them three days and three nights with her little girls' +heads in her lap? Jest the same thoughts that a mother thinks +to-day, as she cowers down with the children she loves, to hide +from danger; jest the same thoughts that a wife thinks today when +her heart is out a facing danger and death, with the man she +loves. + +She faced danger, and died a hundred deaths in the thought of the +danger to them she loved. I see the very splinters that the cruel +shells and cannon balls split and tore right over her head. Good +honorable splinters and not skairful to look at today, but hard, +and piercin', and harrowin' through them days and nights. + +Time has trampled over that calash she rode round so much in (I +wish I could a seen it); but Time has ground it down into dust. +Time's hand, quiet but heavy, rested down on the shinin' heads of +the three little girls, and their Pa and Ma, and pushed 'em gently +but firmly down out of sight; and all of them savages who used to +follow that calash as it rolled onwards, and all their canoes, and +war hoops, and snowshoes, etc., etc. + +Yes, that calash of Miss Riedesel has rolled away, rolled away +years ago, carryin' the three little girls, their Pa and Ma and +all the fears, and hopes, and dreads, and joys, and heartaches of +that time it has rolled on with 'em all; on, on, down the dusty +road of Oblivion, -- it has disappeared there round the turn of +road, and a cloud of dust comes up into our faces, as we try to +follow it. And the Injuns that used to howl round it, have all +follered on the trail of that calash, and gone on, on, out of +sight. Their canoes have drifted away down the blue Hudson, away +off into the mist and the shadows. Curius, haint it? + +And there the same hills and valleys lay, calm and placid, there +is the same blue sparklin' Hudson. Dretful curius, and sort a +heart breakin' to think on't -- haint it? Only jest a few more +years and we, too, shall go round the turn of the road, out of +sight, out of sight, and a cloud of dust will come up and hide us +from the faces of them that love us, and them, too, from the eyes +of a newer people. + +All our hopes, all our ambitious, all our loves, our joys, our +sorrows, -- all, all will be rolled away or floated away down the +river, and the ripples will ripple on jest as happy; the Sunshine +will kiss the hills jest as warmly, and lovin'ly; but other eyes +will look on 'em, other hearts will throb and burn within 'em at +the sight. + +Kinder sad to think on, haint it? + + + + +XVIII. + +THE SOCIAL SCIENCE MEETING. + + +One day Josiah and me went into a meetin' where they wuz kinder +fixin' over the world, sort a repairin' of it, as you may say. +Some of the deepest, smartest speeches I ever hearn in my life, I +hearn there. + +You know it is a middlin' deep subject. But they rose to it. +They rose nobly to it. Some wuz for repairin' it one way, and +some another -- some wanted to kinder tinker it up, and make it +over like. Some wanted to tear it to pieces, and build it over +new. But they all meant well by the world, and nobody could help +respectin' 'em. + +I enjoyed them hours there with 'em, jest about as well as it is +in my power to enjoy anything. They wuz all on 'em civilized +Christian folks and philanthropists of different shades and +degrees, all but one. There wuz one heathen there. A Hindoo +right from Hindoostan, and I felt kinder sorry for him. A +heathen sot right in the midst of them folks of refinement, and +culture, who had spent their hull lives a tryin' to fix over the +world, and make it good. + +This poor little heathen, with a white piller case, or sunthin' +wound round his head (I s'pose he hadn't money to buy a hat), and +his small black eyes lookin' out kinder side ways from his dark +hombly little face, rousted up my pity, and my sympathy. There +had been quite a firm speech made against allowin' foreigners on +our shores. And this little heathen, in his broken speech, said, +It all seemed so funny to him, when everybody wuz foreigners in +this country, to think that them that got here first should say +they owned it, and send everybody else back. And he said, It +seemed funny to him, that the missionarys we sent over to his +land to teach them the truth, told them all about this land of +Liberty, where everybody wuz free, and everybody could earn a +home for themselves, and urged 'em all to come over here, and +then when they broke away from all that held 'em in their own +land, and came thousands and thousands of milds, to get to this +land of freedom and religion,then they wuz sent back agin, and +wuzn't allowed to land. It seemed so funny. + +And so it did to me. And I said to myself, I wonder if they +don't lose all faith in the missionarys, and what they tell them. +I wonder if they don't have doubts about the other free country +they tell 'em about. The other home they have urged 'em to prepare +for, and go to. I wonder if they haint afraid, that when they +have left their own country and sailed away for that home of +Everlastin' freedom, they will be sent back agin, and not allowed +to land. + +But it comferted me quite a good deal to meditate on't, that that +land didn't have no laws aginst foreign emigration. That its +ruler wuz one who held the rights of the lowest, and poorest, and +most ignerent of His children, of jest as much account as he did +the rights of a king. Thinkses I that poor little head with the +piller case on it will be jest as much looked up to, as if it wuz +white and had a crown on it. And I felt real glad to think it +wuz so. + +But I went to every meetin' of 'em, and enjoyed every one of 'em +with a deep enjoyment. And I said then, and I say now, for folks +that had took such a hefty job as they had, they done well, nobody +could do better, and if the world wuzn't improved by their talk it +wuz the fault of the world, and not their'n. + +And we went to meetin' on Sunday mornin' and night, and hearn +good sermons. There's several high big churches at Saratoga, of +every denomination, and likely folks belong to the hull on 'em: +There is no danger of folks losin' their way to Heaven unless +they want to, and they can go on their own favorite paths too, be +they blue Presbyterian paths, or Methodist pasters, or by the +Baptist boat, or the Episcopalian high way, or the Catholic +covered way, or the Unitarian Broadway, or the Shadow road of +Spiritualism. + +No danger of their losin' their way unless they want to. And I +thought to myself as I looked pensively at the different steeples, +"What though there might be a good deal of'wranglin', and screechin', +and puffin' off steam, at the different stations, as there must +always be where so many different routes are a layin' side by side, +each with its own different runners, and conductors, and porters, +and managers, and blowers, still it must be, that the separate +high ways would all end at last in a serener road, where the true +wayfarers and the earnest pilgrims would all walk side by side, and +forget the very name of the station they sot out from. + +I sez as much to my companion, as we wended our way home from one +of the meetin's, and he sez, "There haint but one right way, and +it is a pity folks can't see it." Sez he a sithin' deep, "Why +can't everybody be Methodists?" + +We wuz a goin' by the 'Piscopal church then, and he sez a lookin' +at it, as if he wuz sorry for it, "What a pity that such likely +folks as they be, should believe in such eronious doctrines. +Why," sez he, "I have hearn that they believe that the bread at +communion is changed into sunthin' else. What a pity that they +should believe anything so strange as that is, when there is a +good, plain, practical, Christian belief that they might believe +in, when they might be Methodists. And the Baptists now," sez +he, a glancin' back at their steeple, "why can't they believe +that a drop is as good as a fountain? Why do they want to +believe in so much water? There haint no need on't. They might +be Methodists jest as well as not, and be somebody." + +And he walked along pensively and in deep thought, and I a feelin' +somewhat tuckered didn't argue with him, and silence rained about +us till we got in front of the hall where the Spiritualists hold +their meetin's, and we met a few a comin' out on it and then he +broke out and acted mad, awful mad and skernful, and sez he +angrily, "Them dumb fools believe in supernatural things. They +don't have a shadow of reason or common sense to stand on. A man +is a fool to gin the least attention to them, or their doin's. Why +can't they believe sunthin' sensible? Why can't they jine a church +that don't have anything curius in it? Nothin' but plain, common +sense facts in it: Why can't they be Methodists?" + +"The idee!" sez he, a breakin' out fresh. "The idee of believin' +that folks that have gone to the other world can come back agin +and appear. Shaw!" sez he, dretful loud and bold. I don't believe +I ever heard a louder shaw in my life than that wuz, or more kinder +haughty and highheaded. + +And then I spoke up, and sez, "Josiah, it is always well, to shaw +in the right place, and I am afraid you haint studied on it as +much as you ort. I am afraid you haint a shawin' where you ort +to." + +"Where should I shaw?" sez he, kinder snappish. + +"Wall," sez I, "when you condemn other folkses beliefs, you ort +to be careful that you haint a condemin' your own belief at the +same time. Now my belief is grounded in the Methodist meetin' +house like a rock; my faith has cast its ancher there inside of +her beliefs and can't be washed round by any waves of opposin' +doctrines. But I am one who can't now, nor never could, abide +bigotry and intolerance either in a Pope, or a Josiah Allen. + +"And when you condemn a belief simply on the ground of its bein' +miraculous and beyond your comprehension, Josiah Allen, you had +better pause and consider on what the Methodist faith is founded. + +"All our orthodox meetin' houses, Presbyterian, Baptist, Methodist, +Episcopalian, every one on 'em, Josiah Allen, are sot down on a +belief, a deathless faith in a miraculous birth, a life of +supernatural events, the resurrection of the dead, His appearance +after death, a belief in the graves openin' and the dead comin' +forth, a belief in three persons inhabitin' one soul, the constant +presence and control of spiritual influences, the Holy Ghost, and +the spirits of just men. And while you are a leanin' up against +that belief, Josiah Allen, and a leanin' heavy, don't shaw at any +other belief for the qualities you hold sacred in your own." + +He quailed a very little, and I went on. + +"If you want to shaw at it, shaw for sunthin' else in it, or else +let it entirely alone. If you think it lacks active Christian +force, if you think it is not aggressive in its assaults at Sin, +if you think it lacks faith in the Divine Head of the church, say +so, do; but for mercy's sake try to shaw in the right place." + +"Wall," sez he, "they are a low set that follers it up mostly, +and you know it." And his head was right up in the air, and he +looked very skernful. + +But I sez, "Josiah Allen, you are a shawin' agin in the wrong +place," sez I. "If what you say is true, remember that 1800 +years ago, the same cry wuz riz up by Pharisees, `He eats with +Publicans and sinners.' They would not have a king who came in +the guise of the poor, they scerned a spiritual truth that did +not sparkle with worldly lustre. + +"But it shone on; it lights the souls of humanity to-day. Let us +not be afraid, Josiah Allen. Truth is a jewel that cannot be +harmed by deepest investigation, by roughest handlin'. It can't +be buried, it will shine out of the deepest darkness. What is +false will be washed away, what is true will remain. For all +this frettin', and chafing, all this turbelence of conflectin' +beliefs, opposin' wills, will only polish this jewel. Truth, +calm and serene, will endure, will shine, will light up the +world." + +He begun to look considerable softer in mean, and I continued +on: "Josiah Allen, you and I know what we believe the beautiful +religion (Methodist Episcopal) that we both love, makes a light +in our two souls. But don't let us stand in that light and yell +out, that everybody else's light is darkness; that our light is +the only one. No, the heavens are over all the earth; the twelve +gates of heaven are open and a shinin' down on all sides of us. + +"Jonesville meetin' house (Methodist Episcopal) haint the only +medium through which the light streams. It is dear to us, Josiah +Allen, but let us not think that we must coller everybody and +drag 'em into it. And let us not cry out too much at other +folkses superstitions, when the rock of our own faith, that +comforts us in joy and sorrow, is sot in a sea of supernaturalism. + +"You know how that faith comforts our two souls, how it is to us, +like the shadow of a great rock in a weary land, but they say, +their belief is the same to them, let us not judge them too +hardly. No, the twelve gates of heaven are open, Josiah Allen, +and a shinin' down onto the earth. We know the light that has +streamed into our own souls, but we do not know exactly what rays +of radience may have been reflected down into some other lives +through some one of those many gates. + +"The plate below has to be prepared, before it can ketch the +picture and hold it. The light does not strike back the same +reflection from every earthly thing. The serene lake mirrors +back the light, in a calm flood of glory, the flashin' waterfall +breaks it into a thousand dazzlin' sparkles. The dewy petal of +the yellow field lily, reflects its own ray of golden light back, +so does the dark cone of the pine tree, and the diamond, the +opal, the ruby, each tinges the light with its own coloring, but +the light is all from above. And they all reflect the light, in +their own way for which the Divine skill has prepared them. + +"Let us not try to compel the deep blue Ocean waves and the +shinin' waterfall, and the lily blow, to reflect back the light, +in the same identical manner. No, let the light stream down into +high places, and low ones, let the truth shine into dark hearts, +and into pure souls. God is light. God is Love. It is His +light that shines down out of the twelve gates, and though the +ruby, or the amethyst, may color it by their own medium, the +light that is reflected, back is the light of Heaven. And Josiah +Allen," sez I in a deeper, earnester tone, "let us who know so +little ourselves, be patient with other ignerent ones. Let us +not be too intolerent, for no intolerence, Josiah Allen is so +cruel as that of ignerence, an' stupidity." + +Sez Josiah, "I won't believe in anything I can't see, Samantha +Allen." + +I jest looked round at him witheringly, and sez I, "What have +you ever seen, Josiah Allen, I mean that is worth sein'? Haint +everything that is worth havin' in life, amongst the unseen? The +deathless loves, the aspirations, the deep hopes, and faiths, +that live in us and through us, and animate us and keep us alive, +-- Whose spectacles has ever seen 'em? What are we, all of us +human creeters, any way, but little atoms dropped here, Heaven +knows why, or how, into the midst of a perfect sea of mystery, +and unseen influences. What hand shoved us forwards out of the +shadows, and what hand will reach out to us from the shadows and +draw us back agin? Have you seen it Josiah Allen? You have felt +this great onseen force a movin' you along, but you haint sot +your eyes on it. + +"What is there above us, below us, about us, but a waste of +mystery, a power of onseen influences?. + +"You won't believe anything you can't see: -- Did you ever see +old Gravity, Josiah Allen, or get acquainted with him? Yet his +hands hold the worlds together. Who ever see the mysterious +sunthin' in the North that draws the ship's compass round? Who +ever see that great mysterious hand that is dropped down in the +water, sweepin' it back and forth, makin' the tides come in, and +the tides go out? Who ever has ketched a glimpse of them majestic +fingers, Josiah Allen? Or the lips touched with lightnin', whose +whispers reach round the world, and through the Ocean? You haint +see 'em, nor I haint, No, Josiah Allen, we don't know much of +anything, and we don't know that for certain. We are all on us +only poor pupils down in the Earth's school-room, learnin' with + difficulty and heart ache the lessons God sets for us. + +Tough old Experience gives us many a hard floggin', before we +learn the day's lessons. And we find the benches hard, long +before sundown. And it makes our hearts ache to see the mates we +love droop their too tired heads in sleep, all round us before +school is out. But we grind on at our lessons, as best we may. +Learnin' a little maybe. Havin' to onlearn a sight, as the +pinters move on towards four. Clasping hands with fellow toilers +and (hard task) onclaspin' 'em, as they go up above us, or down +nearer the foot. Havin' little `intermissions' of enjoyment, +soon over. But we plod on, on, and bimeby -- and sometimes we +think we do not care how soon -- the teacher will say to us, that +we can be 'dismissed.' And then we shall drop out of the rank of +learners, and the school will go without us, jest as busily, jest +as cheerfully, jest as laboriously, jest as sadly. Poor learners +at the hard lessons of life. Learnin' out of a book that is held +out to us from the shadows by an onseen, inexorable hand. +Settin' on hard benches that may fall out from under us at any +time. Poor ignerent creeters that we are, would it not be a too +arrant folly for us to judge each other hardly, we, all on us, so +deplorably ignerent, so weakly helpless?" + +Sez Josiah, in earnest axcents, "Le's walk a little faster." + +And, in lookin' up, I see that he wuz readin' a advertisement. I +ketched sight of a picture ornamentin' of it. It wuz Lydia +Pinkham. And as I see that benine face, I found and recovered +myself. Truly, I had been a soarin' up, up, fur above Saratoga, +Patent Medicines, Josiah Allen, etc., etc. + +But when I found myself by the side of Josiah Allen once more, I +moved onwards in silence, and soon we found ourselves right by +the haven where I desired to be, -- our own tried and true +boardin' house. + +Truly eloquence is tuckerin', very, especially when you are a +soarin' and a walkin' at the same time. + + + + +XIX. + +ST. CHRISTINA'S HOME. + + +Wall, it wuz that very afternoon, almost immegetly after dinner, +that Josiah Allen invited me warmly to go with him to the Roller +Coaster. And I compromised the matter by his goin' with us first +to St. Christina's Home, and then, I told him, I would proceed +with him to the place where he would be. They wuz both on one +road, nigh to each other, and he consented after some words. + +I felt dretfully interested in this Home, for it is a place where +poor little sick children are took to, out of their miserable, +stiflin', dirty garrets, and cellars, and kep' and made well and +happy in their pleasant, home-like surroundin's. And I thought +to myself, as I looked ont on the big grounds surroundin' it, and +walked through the clean wide rooms, that the change to these +children, brought out of their narrow dark homes of want and woe, +into this great sunshiny Home with its clean fresh rooms, its +good food, its cheery Christian atmosphere, its broad sunshiny +playgrounds, must seem like enterin' Paradise to 'em. + +And I thought to myself how thankful I wuz that this pleasant +House Beautiful, wuz prepared for the rest and refreshment of the +poor little pilgrims, worn out so early in the march of life. +And I further thinkses I, "Heaven bless the kind heart that first +thought on't, and carried out the heavenly idee." + +The children's faces all looked, so happy, and bright, it wuz a +treat to see 'em. And the face of the sister who showed us round +the rooms looked as calm, and peaceful, and happy, as if her face +wuz the sun from which their little lights wuz reflected. + +Up amongst the rooms overhead, every one on 'em clean as a pin +and sweet and orderly, wuz one room that specially attracted my +attention. It wuz a small chapel where the little ones wuz took +to learn their prayers and say 'em. It wuzn't a big, barren barn +of a room, such as I have often seen in similar places, and which +I have always thought must impress the children with a awful sense +of the immensity and lonesomeness of space, and the intangebility, +and distance of the Great Spirit who inhabiteth Eternity. No, it +wuz small, and cozy, and cheerful, like a home. And the stained +glass window held a beautiful picture of love and charity, which +might well touch the children's hearts, sweetly and unconsciously, +with the divine worth of love, and beauty, and goodness. + +And I could fancy the dear, little ones kneelin' here, and +prayin' "Our Father, who art in Heaven," and feelin' that He wuz +indeed their Father, and not a stranger, and that Heaven wuz not +fur off from 'em. + +And I thought to myself "Never! never! through all their life +will they get entirely away from the pure, sweet lessons they +learn here." + +I enjoyed the hour I spent here with a deep, heart enjoyment, and +so did Josiah. Or, that is, I guess he did, though he whispered +to me from time to time, or even oftener, as we went through the +buildin', that we wuz a devourin' time that we might be spendin' +at the Roller Coaster. + +Wall, at last, greatly to my pardner's satisfaction, we sot out +for the place where he fain would be. On our way there we roamed +through another Indian Encampment, a smaller one than that where +we had the fearful incident of the Mermaid and Sarah. + +No, it wuzn't so big, but it had many innocent diversions and a +photograph gallery, and other things for its comfert. And a +standin' up a leanin' aginst a tree, by one of the little houses +stood a Injun. He wuz one of the last left of his tribe. He +seemed to be a lookin' pensively on -- and seein' how the land +that had belonged to 'em, the happy huntin'-grounds, the springs +they believed the Great Spirit had gin to 'em, had all passed +away into the bands of another race. + +I wuz sorry for that Injun, real sorry. And thinkses I to +myself, we feel considerable pert now, and lively, but who knows +in another three or four hundred years, but what one of the last +of our race, may be a leanin' up aginst some new tree, right in +the same spot, a watchin' the old places passed away into other +hands, mebby black hands, or some other colored ones; mebby +yellow ones, who knows? I don't, nor Josiah don't. But my +pardner wuz a hurryin' me on, so I dropped my revery and my +umberell in my haste to foller on after his footsteps. + +Josiah picked up my umberell, but he couldn't pick up my soarin' +emotions for me. No, he haint never been able, to get holt of +'em. But suffice it to say, that soon, preceded by my companion, +I found myself a mountin' the nearly precipitus stairs, that led +to the Roller Coaster. + +And havin' reached the spot, who should we find there but Ardelia +Tutt and Bial Flamburg. They had been on the Roller Coaster +seven times in succession, and the car. And they wuz now a +sittin' down to recooperate their energies, and collect their +scattered wits together. The Roller Coaster is very scatterin' +to wits that are not collected firm and sound, and cemented by +strong common sense. + +The reason why the Roller Coaster don't scatter such folkses wits +is supposed to be because, they don't go on to it. Ardelia +looked as if her idees wuz scattered to the four pints of the +compass. As for Bial, it seemed to me, as if he never had none +to scatter. But he spoke out to once, and said, he didn't care +to ride on 'em. (Bial Flamburg's strong pint, is his +truthfulness, I can't deny that.) + +Ardelia wouldn't own up but what she enjoyed it dretfully. You +know folks are most always so. If they partake of a pleasure and +recreation that is doubtful in its effects, they will always say, +what a high extreme of enjoyment they enjoyed a partakin' of it. +Curius, haint it? Wall, Josiah had been anticipatin' so much +enjoyment from the exercise, that I didn't make no move to +prevent him from embarkin' on it -- though it looked hazardous +and dangerous in the extreme. + +I looked down on the long valleys, and precipitous heights of the +assents and desents, in which my pardner wuz so soon to be +assentin' and desentin' and I trembled, and wuz jest about to +urge him to forego his diversion, for the sake of his pardner's +happiness, but as I turned to expostulate with him, I see the +beautiful, joyous, hopeful look on his liniment, and the words +fell almost dead on my tongue. I felt that I had ruther suffer +in silence than to say one word to mar that bliss. + +Such is the love of pardners, and such is some of the agonies +they suffer silently to save from woundin' the more opposite one. +No, I said not a word; but silently sat, and see him makin' his +preparations to embark. He see the expression onto my face, and +he too wuz touched by it. He never said one word to me about +embarkin' too, which I laid to two reasons. One wuz my immovable +determination not to embark on the voyage, which I had confided +to him before. + +And the other wuz, the added expenses of the journey if he took +his companion with him. + +No, I felt that he thought it wuz better we should part temporarily +than that the expenditure should be doubled. But as the time drew +near for him to leave me, I see by his meen that he felt bad about +leavin' me. He realized what a companion I had been to him. He +realized the safety and repose he had always found at my side and +the unknown dangers he wuz a rushin' into. + +And he got up and silently shook hands with me. He would have +kissed me, I make no doubt, if folks hadn't been a standin' by. +He then embarked, and with lightnin' speed wuz bore away from me, +as he dissapeared down the desent, his few gray hairs waved back, +and as he went over the last precipitus hill, I heard him cry out +in agonizin' axents, "Samantha! Samantha!" + +And I rushed forwards to his rescue but so lightnin' quick wuz +their movements that I met my companion a comin' back, and I sez, +the first thing, "I heard your cry, Josiah! I rushed to save +you, my dear pardner." + +"Yes," sez he, "I spoke out to you, to call your attention to the +landscape, over the woods there!" + +I looked at him in a curious, still sort of a way, and didn't say +nothin' only just that look. Why, that man looked all trembly +and broke up, but he kep' on. + +"Yes, it wuz beautiful and inspirin', and I knew you wuz such a +case for landscapes, I thought I would call your attention to +it." + +Sez I, coldly, "You wuz skairt, Josiah Allen, and you know it." + +"Skairt! the idee of me bein' skairt. I wuz callin' your +attention to the beauty of the view, over in the woods." + +"What wuz it?" sez I, still more coldly; for I can't bear deceit, +and coverin' up. + +"Oh, it wuz a house, and a tree, and a barn, and things." + +"A great seen to scream about," sez I. "It would probable have +stood there till you got back, but you couldn't seem to wait." + +"No, I have noticed that you always wanted to see things to once. +I have noticed it in you." + +"I could most probable have waited till you got back, to see a +house and a tree." And in still more -- frigid axents, I added, +"Or a barn." And I sez, kinder sarkastikly, "You enjoyed your +ride, I s'pose." + +"Immensely, it wuz perfectly beautiful! So sort a free and +soarin' like. It is jest what suits a man." + +"You'd better go right over it agin," sez I. + +"Yes," sez the man who runs the cars. "You'd better go agin." + +"Oh no," sez Josiah. + +"Why not?" sez I. + +"Why not?" sez the man. + +Josiah Allen looked all around the room, and down on the grass, +as if trying to find a good reasonable excuse a layin' round +loose somewhere, so's he could get holt of it. + +"You'd better go," sez I, "I love to see you happy, Josiah +Allen." + +"Yes, you'd better go," sez the man. + +"No!" sez Josiah, still a lookin' round for a excuse, up into the +heavens and onto the horizon. And at last his face kinder +brightenin' up, as if he had found one: "No, it looks so kinder +cloudy, I guess I won't go. I think we shall have rain between +now and night." And so we said no more on the subject and sot +out homewards. + +Ardelia wrote a poem on the occasion, wrote it right there, with +rapidity and a lead pencil, and handed it to me, before I left +the room. I put it into my pocket and didn't think on it, for +some days afterwards. + +That night after we got home from the Roller Coaster, I felt +dretful sort a down hearted about Abram Gee, I see in that little +incident of the day, that Bial, although I couldn't like him, yet +I see he had his good qualities, I see how truthful he wuz. And +although I love truth -- I fairly worship it -- yet I felt that +if things wuz as he said they wuz, he would more'n probable get +Ardelia Tutt, for I know the power of Ambition in her, and I felt +that she would risk the chances of happiness, for the name of +bein' a Banker's Bride. + +So I sat there in deep gloom, and a chocolate colored wrapper, +till as late as half past nine o'clock P. M. And I felt that the +course of Abram's love wuz not runnin' smooth. No, I felt that +it wuz runnin' in a dwindlin' torrent over a rocky bed, and a +precipitus one. And I felt that if he wuz with me then and +there, if we didn't mingle our tears together we could our +sithes, for I sithed, powerful and frequent. + +Poor short-sighted creeter that I wuz, a settin' in the shadow, +when the sun wuz jest a gettin' ready to shine out onto Abram and +reflect off onto my envious heart. Even at that very time the +hand of righteous Retribution had slipped its sure noose over +Bial Flamburg's neck, and wuz a walkin' him away from Ardelia, +away from happiness (oritory). + +At that very hour, half past nine P. M., Ardelia Tutt and Abram +Gee had met agin, and rosy love and happiness wuz even then a +stringin' roses on the chain that wuz to bind 'em together +forever. + +The way on't wuz: It bein' early when Ardelia got here, Bial +proposed to take her out for a drive and she consented. He got a +livery horse, and buggy, and they say that the livery man knew +jest what sort of a creeter the horse wuz, and knew it wuz liable +to break the buggy all to pieces and them to, and he let 'em have +it for goin.' But howsumever, whether that is so or not, when +they got about five or six milds from Saratoga the horse skeert +out of the road, and throwed 'em both out. + +It wuz a bank of sand that skeert it, a high bank that wuz piled +up by a little hovel that stood by the side of the road. The +ground all round the hut wuz too poor to raise anything else but +sand, and had raised sights of that. + +A man and woman, dretful shabby lookin', wuz a standin' by the +door of the hut, and the man had a shovel in his hand, and had +been a loadin' sand into a awful big wheelbarrow that wuz a +standin' by -- seemin'ly ready to carry it acrost the fields, to +where some man wuz a mixin' some motar, to lay the foundations of +a barn. + +Wall, the old man stood a pantin' by the side of the wheelbarrow, +as if he had indeed got on too heavy a load. It wuz piled up +high. The horse shied, and Ardelia wuz throwed right out onto +the bank of sand, Bial by the side of her. And the old man and +woman came a runnin' up, and callin' out, "Bial, my son, my son, +are you wounded?" + +And there it all wuz. Ardelia see the hull on it. The Banker +wuz before her, and she wuz a layin' on the bank. And the banker +wuz a doin' a heavy business, if anybody doubted it, let 'em take +holt and cart a load on it acrost the fields. + +Wall, Ardelia wuz jarred fearful, in her heart, her ambition, her +pride, and her bones. And as the horse wuz a fleein' far away, +and no other conveyance could be found to transport her to the +next house (Ardelia wouldn't go into his'n), and night wuz +approachin' with rapid strides, the old Banker jest unloaded the +load of sand (good old creeter, he would have to load it all over +agin), and took Ardelia into the wheelbarrow, and wheeled her +over to the next house and unloaded her. + +The old Banker told Ardelia that when his neighbor got home he +would take her back to Saratoga, which he did. He had been to +the village for necessaries, but he turned right round and +carried her back to Mr. Pixleyses. And I s'pose Ardelia paid +him, mebby as high as 75 cents. As for Bial, he tramped off +into the house, and she didn't see him agin, nor didn't want to. +Wall, I s'pose it wuz durin' that ride on the wheelbarrow, that +Ardelia's ambition quelled to softer emotions. I s'pose so. She +never owned it right up to me, but I s'pose so. + +Bial Flamburg hadn't lied a word to her. In all her agony she +realized that. But she had built a high towerin' structure of +ambition on what he said, and it had tottered. And as is natural +in times of danger, the heart turns instinctively to its true +love, she thought of Abram Gee, she wanted him. And as if in +answer to her deep and lovin' thought, who should come out to the +buggy to help her out at Mr. Pixleyses gate, but Abram Gee? He +had come unexpected, and on the eight o'clock train, and wuz +there waitin' for her. + +If Bial Flamburg had been with her, he wouldn't have gone a nigh +the buggy, but he see it was a old man, and he rushed out. +Ardelia couldn't walk a step on her feet (owin' to bein shaken +up, in bones and feelin's), and Abram jest took her in his strong +lovin' arms and carried her into the house, and she sort a clung +round his neck, and seemed tickled enough to see him, + +But she wuz dretful shook up and agitated, and it wuzn't till way +along in the night some time, that she wuz able to write a poem +called, "a lay on a wheelbarrow; or, the fallen one." + +Which I thought when I read it, wuz a good name for it, for truly +she had fell, and truly she had lay on it. Howsumever, Ardelia +wrote that jest because it wuz second nater to write poetry on +every identical thing she ever see or did. + +She wuz glad enough to get rid of Bial Flamburg, and glad enough +to go back to her old love. Abram wuz too manly and tender to +say a word to Ardelia that night on the subject nearest to his +heart. No, he see she needed rest. But the next day, when they +wuz alone together, I s'pose he put the case all before her. All +his warm burnin' love for her, all his jealousy, and his +wretchedness while she wuz a waverin' between Banks and Bread, +how his heart had been checked by the thought that Bial would +vault over him, and in the end hold him at a discount. + +Why, I s'pose he talked powerful and melted Ardelia's soft little +heart till it wuz like the softest kind of dough in his hands. +And then he went on tenderly to say, how he needed her, and how +she could mould him to her will. I s'pose he talked well, and +eloquent, I s'pose so. Anyhow she accepted him right there in +full faith and a pink and white cambric dress. + +And they came over and told me about it in the afternoon P. M. +And I felt well and happy in my mind, and wished 'em joy with a +full heart and a willin' mind. + +They are both good creeters. And she bein' so soft, and he so +kinder hardy and stout-hearted, I believe they will get along +firstrate. And when she once let her mind and heart free to +think on him, she worships him so openly and unreservedly (though +soft), that I don't, believe there is a happier man in the hull +country. + +Wall, I lay out to give'em a handsome present when they be +married, which will be in the fall. Mother Gee (who has got as +well as can be expected) is goin' to live with Susan. And I'm +glad on't. Mother Gee is a good old female no doubt, but it is +resky work to take a new husband to live with, and when you take +a mother-in-law too it adds to the resk. + +But she is goin' to live with Susan; it is her prefference. + +And Abram has done so well, that he has bought another five acres +onto his place, and is a goin' to fix his house all over splendid +before the weddin' day. And Ardelia is to go right from the +altar to her home -- it is her own wishes. + +She knows enough in her way, Ardelia duz. And she has a wisdom +of the heart which sometimes I think, goes fur ahead of the +wisdom of the head. And then agin, I think they go well +together, wisdom of the head and the heart too. (The times I +think this is after readin' her poetry.) + +But any way she will make Abram a good soft little wife, lovin' +and affectionate always. And good land! he loves her to that +extent that it wouldn't make no difference to him if she didn't +know enough to come in when it rained. He would fetch her in, +drippin' and worship her, damp or dry. + + + + +XX. + +AN ACCIDENT WITH RESULTS. + + +Wall, it wuz on the very day before we laid out to leave for +home. I wuz a settin' in my room a mendin' up a rip in my +pardner's best coat, previous to packin' in his trunk, when all +of a sudden Miss Flamm's hired girl came in a cryin', and sez I, +"What is the matter?" + +And sez she, "Ah! Miss Flamm has sent for you and Mr. Allen to +come over there right away. There has been a axident." + +"A axident!" sez I. + +"Yes," sez she. "The little girl has got hurt, and they don't +think she will live. Poor little pretty thing," sez the hired +girl, and busted out a cryin' agin. + +"How did she get hurt?" sez I, as I laid down the coat, and went +to tyin' on my bunnet mekanically. + +"Wall, the nurse had her out with the baby and the little boys. +And we s'pose she had been drinkin' too much. We all knew she +drinked, and she wuzn't in a condition to go out with the +children this mornin', and Miss Flamm would have noticed it and +kep' 'em in, but the dog wuz sick all night, and Miss Flamm wuz +up with it most all night, and she felt wore out this mornin' +with her anxtety for the dog, and her want of sleep, and so they +went out, and it wuzn' more'n half an hour before it took place. +She left the baby carriage and the little boys and girl in a +careless place, not knowin' what she wuz about, and they got run +over. The baby and the little boys wuzn't hurt much, but they +think the little girl will die. Miss Flamm went right into a +caniption fit," sez she, "when she wuz brung in." + +"It is a pity she hadn't went into one before," sez I very dryly, +dry as a chip almost. My axents wuz fairly dusty they wuz so +dry. But my feelin's for Miss Flamm moistened up and melted down +when I see her, when we went into the room. It didn't take us +long for they are still to the tarven, and we met Josiah Allen at +the door, so he went with us. + +Yes, Miss Flamm felt bad enough, bad enough. She has got a +mother's heart after all, down under all the strings and girtins, +and laces, and dogs, etc., etc., that have hid it, and surrounded +it. Her face wuz jest as white and deathly as the little girl's, +and that wuz jest the picture of stillness and death. And I +remembered then that I had heard that the little girl wuz her +favorite amongst her children, whenever she had any time to +notice 'em. She wuz a only daughter and a beauty, besides bein' +smart. + +The doctor had been there and done what he could, and go gone +away. He said there wuz nothin' more to do till she came out of +that stuper, if she ever did. + +But it looked like death, and there Miss Flamm sot alone with her +child, and her conscience. She wuzn't a cryin' but there wuz a +look in her eyes, in her set white face that went beyond tears, +fur beyond 'em. She gripped holt of my hand with her icy cold +ones, and sez she, "Pray for me!" She wuz brung up a Methodist, +and knew we wuz the same. My feelin's overcame me as I looked in +her face and the child's, both lookin' like dyin' faces, and I +sez with the tears a jest runnin' down my cleeks and a layin' my +hand tender on her shoulder, "Is there anything I can do for you, +you poor little creeter?" + +"Pray for me," sez she agin, with her white lips not movin' in a +smile, nor a groan. + +Now my companion, Josiah Allen, is a class-leader, and though I +say it that mebby shouldn't -- That man is able in prayer. He +prays as if he meant what he said. He don't try to show off in +oritory as so many do, or give the Lord information. He never +sez, "Oh Lord, thou knowest by the mornin' papers, so and so." +No, he prays in simple words for what he wants. And he always +seems to feel that somebody is nigh to him, a hearin' him, and if +it is best and right, his requests will be granted. + +So I motioned for that man to kneel down by the bed and pray, +which he did. He wuz to the fore side of the bed, and Miss Flamm +and I on the other side. Wall, Josiah commenced his prayer, in a +low earnest askin' voice, then all of a sudden he begun to +hesitate, waver, and act dretful agitated. And his actions and +agitations seemed to last for some time. I thought it wuz his +feelin's overcomin' of him, and of course, my hand bein' over my +eyes in a respectful, decent way, I didin't see nothin'. + +But at last, after what wuz seemingly a great effort, he began to +go on as usual agin. About that time I heard sunthin' hit the +wall hard on the other side of the room, and I heard a yelp. But +then everything wuz still and Josiah Allen made a good prayer. +And before it wuz through Miss Flamm laid her head down onto my +shoulder, and busted into tears. + +And what wuz rooted up and washed away by them tears I don't +know, and I don't s'pose anybody duz. Whether vanity, and a +mistaken ambition, and the poor empty successes of a fashionable +life wuz uprooted and floated away on the awakened, sweepin' tide +of a mother's love and remorse; whether the dog floated down that +stream, and low necked dresses, and high hazardus slippers, and +strings for waists and corsets, and fashion, and folly, and +rivalry, and waltzin', and glitter, and buttons, and show; whether +they all went down that stream, swept along like bubbles on a +heavin' tumultuous tide, I don't know, nor I don't s'pose anybody +duz. + +But any way, from that day on Miss Flamm has been a different +woman. I stayed with her all that night and the next day, she a +not leavin' the child's bed for a minute, and we a not gettin' of +her to, much as we tried to; eatin' whatever we could make her +eat right there by the bedside. And on the 2d day the doctor see +a change in the child and she began to roust a little out of that +stuper, and in a week's time, she wuz a beginnin' to get well. + +We stayed on till she wuz out of danger and then we went home. +But I see that she wuz to be trusted with her children after +that. She dismissed that nurse, got a good motherly one, who she +said would help her take care of the children for the future; +only help her, for she should have the oversight of 'em herself, +always. + +The hired girl told me (Miss Flamm never mentioned it to me), and +she wuz glad enough of it, that the dog wuz dead. It died the +day the little girl wuz hurt. The hired girl said the doctor had +told Miss Flamm, that it couldn't live long. But it wuzn't till +we wuz on our way home that I found out one of the last eppisodes +in that dog's life. You see, sick as that dog wuz, it wuz bound +to bark at my pardner as long as it had a breath left in its body. +And Josiah told me in confidence (and it must be kep', it is right +that it should be); he said jest after he had knelt down and began +to pray he felt that dog climb up onto his heels, and pull at his +coat tails, and growl a low mad growl, and naw at 'em. + +He tried to nestle round and get it off quietly but no, there it +stood right onto Josiah Allen's heels, and hung on, and tugged at +them coat-tails, and growled at 'em that low deep growl, and shook +'em, as if determined to worry 'em off. And there my companion +wuz. He couldn't show his feelin's in his face; he had got to +keep his face all right towards Miss Flamm. And his feelin's was +rousted up about her, and he wuz a wantin', and knew he wuz +expected, to have his words and manner soothin' and comfortin', +and that dog a standin' on his heels and tearin' off his coat-tails. + +What to do he didn't know. He couldn't stop his prayer on such a +time as this and kill a dog, though he owned up to me that he +felt like it, and he couldn't keep still and feel his coat-tails +tore off of him, and be growled at, and shook, and pawed at all +day. So he said after the dog had gin a most powerful tug, almost +a partin' the skirts asunder from his coat, he drew up one foot +carefully (still a keepin' his face straight and the prayer agoin') +and brung it back sudden and voyalent, and he heard the dog strike +aginst the opposite side of the room with one short, sharp yelp, +and then silence rained down and he finished the prayer. + +But he said, and owned it up to me, that it didn't seem to him so +much like a religious exercise, as he could wish. It didn't seem +to help his spiritual growth much, if any. + +And I sez, "I should think as much," and I sez, "You wuz in a +hard place, Josiah Allen." + +And he sez, "It wuz the dumbest hard place any one wuz ever in on +earth." + +And I sez, "I don't know but it wuz." That man wuz to be pitied, +and I told him so, and he acted real cheerful and contented at +hearin' my mind. He owned up that he had dreaded tellin' me +about it, for fear I would upbraid him. But, good land! I would +have been a hard hearted creeter if I could upbraid a man for +goin' through such a time as that. He said he thought mebby I +would think it wuz irreverent or sunthin', the dog's actions, at +such a time. + +"Wall," sez I, "you didn't choose the actions, did you? It +wuzn't nothin' you wanted." + +"No," sez he feelin'ly. "Heaven knows I didn't. And I done the +best I could," sez he sort a pitiful. + +Sez I, "I believe you, Josiah Allen," and sez I warmly, "I don't +believe that Alexander, or Cezar, or Grover Cleveland, could have +done any better." + +He brightened all up at this, he felt dretful well to think I +felt with him, and my feelin's wuz all rousted up to think of the +sufferin's he had went through, so we felt real well towards each +other. Such is some of the comforts and consolations of pardners. +Howsumever, the dog died, and I wuz kinder sorry for the dog. I +think enough of dogs (as dogs) and always did. Always use 'em +dretful well, only it mads me to have 'em put ahead of children, +and sot up in front of 'em. I always did and always shall like a +dog as a dog. + +Wall, they say that when that dog died, Miss Flamm hardly +inquired about it, she wuz so took up in gettin' acquainted with +her own children. And I s'pose they improved on acquaintance, +for they say she is jest devoted to 'em. And she got acquainted +with G. Washington too, so they say. He wuz a stiddy, quiet man, +and she had got to lookin' on him as her banker and business man. +But they say she liked him real well, come to get acquainted with +him. He always jest worshipped her, so they are real happy. +There wuz always sunthin' kinder good about Miss Flamm. + +Thos. J. is a carryin' on another lawsuit for her (more money +that descended onto her from her father, or that ort to descend). +And he is carryin' it stiddy and safe. It will bring Thomas +Jefferson over 900 dollars in money besides fame, a hull lot of +fame. + +Wall, we sot sail for home in good spirits, and the noon train. +And we reached Jonesville with no particular eppisodin' till we +got to the Jonesville Depot. + +I rather think Ardelia Tutt wrote a poem on the cars goin' home, +though I can't say for certain. + +She and Abram sot a few seats in front of us, and I thought I see +a certain look to the backside of her head that meant poetry. It +wuz a kind of a sot look, and riz up like. But I can't say for +certain for she didn't have no chance to tell me about it. Abram +looked down at her all the time as if he jest worshipped her. +And she is a good little creeter, and will make him a happy wife; +I don't make no doubt. As I said, the old lady is goin' to live +with Susan. They went right on in the train, for Ardelia's home +lays beyond Jonesville, and Abram wuz goin' home with her by +Deacon Tutt's request. They are willin'. + +Wall, we disembarked from the cars, and we found the old mair and +the "Democrat" a waitin' for us. Thomas J. wuz a comin' for us, +but had spraint his wrist and couldn't drive. Wall, Josia lifted +our saddul bags in, and my umbrell, and the band box. But when +he went to lift my trunk he faltered. It wuz heavy. I had got +relicts from Mount McGregor, from the Battlefield, from the +various springs, minerals, stuns, and things, and Josiah couldn't +lift it. + +What added to the hardness of the job, the handles had broken +offen it, and he had to grip hold on it, by the might of his +finger nails. It wuz a hard job, and Josiah's face got red and I +felt, as well as see, that his temper wuz a risin'. And I sez, +instinctively, "Josiah, be calm!" For I knew not what unguarded +word he might drop as he vainly tried to grip hold on't, and it +eluded his efferts and came down on the ground every time, a +carryin' with it, I s'pose, portions of his fingernails, broke +off in the fray. + +Wall, he wuz a strugglin' with it and with his feelin's, for I +kep' on a sayin', "Josiah, do be calm! Do be careful about usin' +a profane word so nigh home and at this time of day, and you jest +home from a tower." + +And he kep' his feelin's nobly under control, and never said a +word, only to wonder "what under the High Heavens a woman wanted +to lug round a ton of stuns in her trunk for." And anon sayin' +that he would be dumbed if he didn't leave it right there on the +platform. + +Savin' these few slight remarks that man nobly restrained +himself, and lugged and lifted till the blood almost gushed +through his bald head. And right in the midst of the fray, a +porter came up and went to liftin' the trunk in the usual +highheaded, haughty way Railroad officials have. But anon a +change came over his linement. And as it fell back from his +fingers to the platform for the 3d time, he broke out in a +torrent of swearin' words dretful to hear. + +I felt as if I should sink through the "Democrat". But Josiah +listened to the awful words with a warm glow of pleasure and +satisfaction a beamin' from his face. I never saw him look more +complacent. And as the man moistened his hands and with another +frightful burst of profanity histed it into the end of the buggy. + +Wall, I gin the man a few warnin' words aginst profanity, and +Josiah gin him a quarter for liftin' in the trunk, he said, and +we drove off in the meller glow of the summer sunset. + +But it wuz duskish before we got to the turn of the road, and +considerable dark before we got to the Corners. But we went on +tbgough the shadows, a feelin' we could bear 'em, for we wuz +together, and we wuz a goin' home. + +And pretty soon we got there! The door wuz open, the warm light +wuz a streamin' out from doors and windows, and there stood the +children! + +There they all wuz, all we loved best, a waitin' to welcome us. +Love, which is the light of Heaven, wuz a shinin' on their faces, +and we had got home. + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg Etext of Samantha at Saratoga, by Marietta Holley + diff --git a/old/saman10.zip b/old/saman10.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..d361ea8 --- /dev/null +++ b/old/saman10.zip diff --git a/old/saman10h.zip b/old/saman10h.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..0361dc7 --- /dev/null +++ b/old/saman10h.zip diff --git a/old/smcan10.txt b/old/smcan10.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..2bb82fa --- /dev/null +++ b/old/smcan10.txt @@ -0,0 +1,6874 @@ +Project Gutenberg's A Summer in a Canyon, by Kate Douglas Wiggin +(#15 in our series by Kate Douglas Wiggin) + +Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check +the laws for your country before redistributing these files!!! + +Please take a look at the important information in this header. +We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an +electronic path open for the next readers. + +Please do not remove this. + +This should be the first thing seen when anyone opens the book. +Do not change or edit it without written permission. 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FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.07.00*END* + + + + + +This etext was produced from the 1914 Gay and Hancock, Ltd. +edition by David Price, email ccx074@coventry.ac.uk + + + + + +A SUMMER IN A CANYON: A CALIFORNIA STORY + +by Kate Douglas Wiggin + + + + +SCENE: A Camping Ground in the Canyon Las Flores. + +PEOPLE IN THE TENTS. + +DR. PAUL WINSHIP Mine Host +MRS. TRUTH WINSHIP The Guardian Angel +DICKY WINSHIP A Small Scamp of Six Years +BELL WINSHIP The Camp Poetess +POLLY OLIVER A Sweet but Saucy Lass +MARGERY NOBLE A Nut-Brown Mayde +PHILIP NOBLE The Useful Member +GEOFFREY STRONG A Harvard Boy +JACK HOWARD Prince of Mischief +HOP YET A Heathen Chinee. +PANCHO GUTIERREZ A Mexican man-of-all-work. + + + +CHAPTER I: PREPARATION AND DEPARTURE + + + +'One to make ready, and two to prepare.' + + +It was nine o'clock one sunny California morning, and Geoffrey Strong +stood under the live-oak trees in Las Flores Canyon, with a pot of +black paint in one hand and a huge brush in the other. He could have +handled these implements to better purpose and with better grace had +not his arms been firmly held by three laughing girls, who pulled not +wisely, but too well. He was further incommoded by the presence of a +small urchin who lay on the dusty ground beneath his feet, fastening +an upward clutch on the legs of his trousers. + +There were three large canvas tents directly in front of them, yet no +one of these seemed to be the object of dissension, but rather a +redwood board, some three feet in length, which was nailed on a tree +near by. + +'Camp Frolic! Please let us name it Camp Frolic!' cried Bell +Winship, with a persuasive twitch of her cousin's sleeve. + +'No, no; not Camp Frolic,' pleaded Polly Oliver. 'Pray, pray let us +have Camp Ha-Ha; my heart is set upon it.' + +'As you are Strong, be merciful,' quoted Margery Noble, coaxingly; +'take my advice and call it Harmony Camp.' + +At this juncture, a lovely woman, whose sweet face and smile made you +love her at once, came up the hill from the brookside. 'What, what! +still quarrelling, children?' she asked, laughingly. 'Let me be +peacemaker. I've just asked the Doctor for a name, and he suggests +Camp Chaparral. What do you say?' + +Bell released one coat-tail. 'That isn't wholly bad,' she said, +critically, while the other girls clapped their hands with approval; +for anything that Aunt Truth suggested was sure to be quite right. + +'Wait a minute, good people,' cried Jack Howard, flinging his +fishing-tackle under a tree and sauntering toward the scene of +action. 'Suppose we have a referee, a wise and noble judge. Call +Hop Yet, and let him decide this all-important subject.' + +His name being sung and shouted in various keys by the assembled +company, Hop Yet appeared at the door of the brush kitchen, a broad +grin on his countenance, a plucked fowl in his hand. + +Geoffrey took the floor. 'Now, Hop Yet, you know I got name, you got +name, everybody got name. We want name this camp: you sabe? Miss +Bell, she say Camp Frolic. Frolic all same heap good time' (here he +executed a sort of war-dance which was intended to express wild joy). +'Miss Pauline, she say Camp Ha-Ha, big laugh: sabe? Ha! ha! ha! ha! +ha! ha!' (chorus joined in by all to fully illustrate the subject). +'Miss Madge, she say Camp Harmony. Harmony all same heap quiet time, +plenty eat, plenty drink, plenty sleep, no fight, no too muchee talk. +Mrs. Winship, she say Camp Chaparral: you sabe? Chaparral, Hop Yet. +Now what you say?' + +Hop Yet seemed to regard the question with mingled embarrassment and +amusement, but being a sharp and talkative Chinaman gave his answer +promptly: 'Me say Camp Chap-lal heap good name; plenty chap-lal all +lound; me hang um dish-cloth, tow'l, little boy's stockin', on chap- +lal; all same clo'se-line velly good. Miss Bell she folic, Miss +Polly she ha! ha! allee same Camp Chap-lal.' + +And so Camp Chaparral it was; the redwood board flaunted the +assertion before the eyes of the public (which was a rather limited +one, to be sure) in less than half an hour, and the artist, after +painting the words in rustic letters a foot long, cut branches of the +stiff, ungracious bushes and nailed them to the tree in confirmation +and illustration of the fact. He then carefully deposited the paint- +pot in a secret place, where it might be out of sight and touch of a +certain searching eye and mischievous hand well known and feared of +him; but before the setting sun had dropped below the line of purple +mountain tops, a small boy, who will be known in these annals as +Dicky Winship, might have been seen sitting on the empty paint-pot, +while from a dingy pool upon the ground he was attempting to paint a +copy of the aforesaid inscription upon the side of a too patient +goat, who saw no harm in the operation. He was alone, and very, very +happy. + +And now I must tell you the way in which all this began. You may not +realise it, dear young folks, but this method of telling a story is +very much the fashion with grown-up people, and of course I am not to +blame, since I didn't begin it. + +The plan is this: You must first write a chapter showing all your +people, men, women, children, dogs, and cats, in a certain place, +doing certain things. Then you must go back a year or two and +explain how they all happen to be there. Perhaps you may have to +drag your readers twenty-five years into the regions of the past, and +show them the first tooth of your oldest character; but that doesn't +matter a bit,--the further the better. Then, when everybody has +forgotten what came to pass in the first chapter, you are ready to +take it up again, as if there had never been any parenthesis. +However, I shall not introduce you to the cradles, cribs, or trundle- +beds of my merry young campers, but merely ask you to retrace your +steps one week, and look upon them in their homes. + +On one of the pleasantest streets of a certain little California town +stood, and still stands for aught I know, a pretty brown cottage, +with its verandahs covered with passion-vine and a brilliant rose- +garden in front. It is picturesque enough to attract the attention +of any passer-by, and if you had chosen to peep through the crevices +in the thick vines and look in at the open window, you might have +thought it lovelier within than without. + +It was a bright day, and the gracious June sunshine flooded the room +with yellow light. Three young girls, perhaps fourteen or fifteen +years old, were seated in different parts of the large room, plying +industrious crochet needles and tatting shuttles. Three pairs of +bright eyes were dancing with fun and gladness; and another pair, the +softest and clearest of all, looked out from a broad white bed in the +corner,--tired eyes, and oh, so patient, for the health-giving +breezes wafted in from the blue ocean and carried over mountain tops +and vine-covered slopes had so far failed to bring back Elsie +Howard's strength and vigour. + +The graceful, brown-haired girl with the bright, laughter-loving +face, was Bell Winship. She of the dancing blue eyes, pink cheeks, +and reckless little sun-bonnet was Pauline, otherwise Polly Oliver. +Did you ever know a Polly without some one of these things? Well, my +Polly had them all, and, besides, a saucy freckled nose, a crown of +fluffy, reddish-yellow hair, and a shower of coaxing little pitfalls +called dimples round her pretty mouth. She made you think of a +sunbeam, a morning songbird, a dancing butterfly, or an impetuous +little crocus just out after the first spring shower. Dislike her? +You couldn't. Approve of her? You wouldn't always. Love her? Of +course; you couldn't help yourself,--I defy you. + +To be sure, if you prefer a quiet life, and do not want to be led +into exploits of all kinds, invariably beginning with risk, attended +with danger, and culminating in despair, you had better not engage in +an intimate friendship with Miss Pauline Oliver, but fix your +affections on the quiet, thoughtful, but not less lovable girl who +sits by the bedside stroking Elsie Howard's thin white hand. +Nevertheless, I am obliged to state that Margery Noble herself, +earnest, demure, and given to reflection, was Polly's willing slave +and victim. However, I've forgotten to tell you that Polly was as +open and frank as the daylight, at once torrid and constant in her +affections, brave, self-forgetting as well as self-willed; and that +though she did have a tongue just the least bit saucy, she used it +valiantly in the defence of others. 'She'll come out all right,' +said a dear old-fashioned grandfather of hers whom she had left way +back in a Vermont farmhouse. 'She's got to be purged o' considerable +dross, but she'll come out pure gold, I tell you.' + +Pretty, wise, tender Margery Noble, with her sleek brown braids, her +innocent, questioning eyes, her soft voice, willing hands, and shy, +quiet manners! 'She will either end as the matron of an orphan +asylum or as head-nurse in a hospital.' So Bell Winship often used +to say; but then she was chiefly celebrated for talking nonsense, and +nobody ever paid much attention to her. But if you should crave a +breath of fresh air, or want to believe that the spring has come, +just call Bell Winship in, as she walks with her breezy step down the +street. Her very hair seems instinct with life, with its flying +tendrils of bronze brightness and the riotous little curls on her +brow and temples. Then, too, she has a particularly jaunty way of +putting on her jacket, or wearing a flower or a ribbon; and as for +her ringing peal of laughter, it is like a chime of silver bells. + +Elsie Howard, the invalid friend of the girls, was as dear to them as +they were to each other. She kept the secrets of the 'firm'; mourned +over their griefs and smiled over their joys; was proud of their +talents and tenderly blind to their faults. The little wicker +rocking-chair by the bedside was often made a sort of confessional, +at which she presided, the tenderest and most sympathetic little +priestess in the universe; and every afternoon the piazza, with its +lattice of green vines, served as a mimic throne-room, where she was +wont to hold high court, surrounded by her devoted subjects. Here +Geoffrey Strong used often to read to the assembled company David +Copperfield, Alice in Wonderland, or snatches from the magazines, +while Jack Howard lazily stretched himself under the orange-trees and +braided lariats, a favourite occupation with California boys. About +four o'clock Philip Noble would ride up from his father's fruit +ranch, some three miles out on the San Marcos road, and, hitching his +little sorrel mare Chispa at the gate, stay an hour before going to +the post-office. + +This particular afternoon, however, was not one of Elsie's bright +ones, and there was no sign of court or invalid queen on the piazza. +The voices of the girls floated out from Elsie's bedroom, while the +boys, too, seemed to be somewhere in the vicinity, for there was a +constant stirring about as of lively preparation, together with noise +of hammering and sawing. + +'If you were only going, Elsie, our cup of happiness would be full,' +sighed Bell. + +'Not only would it be full, Bell, but it would be running over, and +we should positively stand in the slop,' said Polly. 'No, you +needn't frown at me, miss; that expression is borrowed from no less a +person than Sydney Smith.' + +'Don't think any more about me,' smiled Elsie. 'Perhaps I can come +down in the course of the summer. I know it will be the happiest +time in the world, but I don't envy you a bit; in fact, I'm very glad +you're going, because you'll have such a lovely budget of adventures +to tell me when you come back.' + +'When we come back, indeed!' exclaimed Bell. 'Why, we shall write +long round-robin letters every few days, and send them by the team. +Papa says Pancho will have to go over to the stage station at least +once a week for letters and any provisions we may need.' + +'Oh, won't that be delightful,--almost as good as being there myself! +And, Margery dear, you must make them tell me every least little +thing that happens. You know they are such fly-aways that they'll +only write me when they learn to swim, or shoot a wildcat, or get +lost in the woods. I want to know all the stupid bits: what you +have for dinner, how and where you sleep, how your camp looks, what +you do from morning till night, and how Dicky behaves.' + +'I can tell you that beforehand,' said Bell, dolefully. 'Jack will +shoot him by mistake on Thursday; he will be kicked by the horses +Friday, and bitten by tarantulas and rattlesnakes Saturday; he will +eat poison oak on Sunday, get lost in the canyon Monday, be eaten by +a bear Tuesday, and drowned in the pool Wednesday. These incidents +will complete his first week; and if they produce no effect on his +naturally strong constitution, he will treat us to another week, +containing just as many mishaps, but no duplicates.' + +By the time this dismal prophecy was ended the other girls were in a +breathless fit of laughter, though all acknowledged it was likely to +be fulfilled. + +'I went over the camping-ground last summer,' said Margery. 'You +know it is quite near papa's sheep ranch, and it is certainly the +most beautiful place in California. The tents will be pitched at the +mouth of the canyon, where there is a view of the ocean, and just at +the back will be a lovely grove of wild oaks and sycamore-trees.' + +'Oh, won't it be delicious!' sighed Elsie. 'I feel as if I could +sniff the air this minute. But there! I won't pretend that I'm +dying for fresh air, with the breath of the sea coming in at my south +window, and a whiff of jasmine and honeysuckle from the piazza. That +would be nonsense. Are your trunks packed?' + +'Trunks!' exclaimed Polly. 'Would you believe it, our clothes are +packed in gunny-sacks! We start in our camping-dresses, with ulsters +for the steamer and dusters for the long drive. Then we each have-- +let me see what we have: a short, tough riding-skirt with a jersey, +a bathing-dress, and some gingham morning-gowns to wear about the +camp at breakfast-time.' + +'And flannel gowns for the night, and two pairs of boots, and a +riding-cap and one hat apiece,' added Margery. + +'But oh, Elsie, my dear, you should see Dicky in his camping-suits,' +laughed Bell. 'They are a triumph of invention on mamma's part. +Just imagine! one is of some enamelled cloth that was left over from +the new carriage cushions; it is very shiny and elegant; and the +other, truly, is of soft tanned leather, and just as pretty as it can +be. Then he has hob-nailed, copper-toed boots, and a hat that ties +under his chin. Poor little man, he has lost his curls, too, and +looks rather like a convict.' + +Mrs. Howard came in the door while Bell was speaking, and laughed +heartily at the description of Dicky's curious outfit. 'What time do +you start?' she asked, as she laid a bunch of mignonette on Elsie's +table. + +'At eleven to-morrow morning,' Bell answered. 'Everything is packed. +We are to start in the steamer, and when we come to our old landing, +about forty miles down the coast, we are to get off and take a three- +seated thorough-brace wagon, and drive over to Las Flores Canyon. +Pancho has hired a funny little pack mule; he says we shall need one +in going up the mountain, and that the boys can take him when they go +out shooting,--to carry the deer home, you know.' + +'If I can bring Elsie down, as I hope, we must come by land,' said +Mrs. Howard. 'I thought we could take two days for the journey, +sleeping at the Burtons' ranch on the way. The doctor says that if +she can get strength enough to bear the ride, the open-air life will +do her good, even if she does nothing but lie in the hammock.' + +'And be waited upon by six willing slaves,' added Polly. + +'And be fed on canned corned beef and tomato stew,' laughed Bell. + +'Not a bit of it,' said Margery. 'Hop Yet is a splendid cook, if he +has anything to cook, and we'll feed her on broiled titbits of baby +venison, goat's milk, wild bees' honey, and cunning little mourning +doves, roasted on a spit.' + +'Good gracious,' cried Bell, 'what angels' food! only I would as soon +devour a pet canary as a mourning dove. But to think that I've been +trying to diet for a week in order to get intimate with suffering and +privation! Polly came to stay with me one night, and we slept on the +floor, with only a blanket under us, and no pillow; it was perfectly +horrid. Polly dreamed that her grandfather ate up her grandmother, +and I that Dicky stabbed the Jersey calf with a pickle-fork.' + +'Horrors!' ejaculated Margery; 'that's a pleasant prospect for your +future bedfellows. I hope the gophers won't make you nervous, +gnawing and scratching in the straw; I got used to them last summer. +But we really must go, darling,' and she stooped to kiss Elsie good- +bye. + +'Well, I suppose you ought,' she answered. 'But remember you are to +start from this gate; Aunt Truth has promised me the fun of seeing +you out of sight.' + +The girls went out at a side door, and joined the boys, who were +busily at work cleaning their guns on the broad western porch. + +'How are you coming on?' questioned Polly. + +'Oh, finely,' answered Jack, who always constituted himself chief +spokesman, unless driven from the rostrum by some one possessed of a +nimbler tongue. 'I only hope your feminine togs are in half as good +order.' + +'We take no baggage to speak of,' said Bell, loftily. 'Papa has cut +us down to the very last notch, and says the law allows very few +pounds on this trip.' + +'The less the better,' quoth Geoff, cheerily; 'then you'll have to +polish up your mental jewels.' + +'Which you consider imitation, I suppose,' sniffed Polly. + +'Perish the thought!' cried Jack. 'But, speaking of mental jewels, +you should see the arrangements Geoff has made for polishing his. He +has actually stuck in six large volumes, any one of which would be a +remedy for sleeplessness. What are you going to study, Miss Pol-y- +on-o-mous Oliver?' + +'Now, Jack, let us decide at once whether you intend to be respectful +or not. I don't propose to expose myself to your nonsense for two +months unless you make me good promises.' + +'Why, that wasn't disrespectful. It is my newest word, and it simply +means having many titles. I'm sure you have more than most people.' + +'Very well, then! I'll overlook the irreverence this time, and +announce that I shall not take anything whatever to read, but simply +reflect upon what I know already.' + +'That may last for the first week,' said Bell, slyly, 'but what will +you do afterward?' + +'I'll reflect upon what you don't know,' retorted Polly. 'That will +easily occupy me two months.' + +Fortunately, at the very moment this stinging remark was made, Phil +Noble dashed up to the front gate, flung his bridle over the +hitching-post, and lifted his hat from a very warm brow. + +'Hail, chief of the commissary department!' cried Geoffrey, with mock +salute. 'Have you despatched the team?' + +'Yes; everything is all right,' said Phil, breathlessly, delivering +himself of his information in spasmodic bursts of words. 'Such a lot +of work it was! here's the list. Pancho will dump them on the ground +and let us settle them when we get there. Such a load! You should +have seen it! Hardly room for him to sit up in front with the +Chinaman. Just hear this,' and he drew a large document from what +Polly called 'a back-stairs pocket.' + +'Forty cans corned beef, four guns, three Dutch cheeses, pickles, +fishing-tackle, flour, bacon, three bushels onions, crate of dishes, +Jack's banjo, potatoes, Short History of the English People, cooking +utensils, three hair pillows, box of ginger-snaps, four hammocks, +coffee, cartridges, sugar, Macaulay's Essays, Pond's extract, sixteen +hams, Bell's guitar, pop-corn, molasses, salt, St. Jacob's Oil, +Conquest of Mexico, sack of almonds, flea-powder, and smoked herring. +Whew! I packed them all myself.' + +'In precisely that order?' questioned Polly. + +'In precisely that order, Miss Oliver,' returned Phil, urbanely. +'Any one who feels that said packing might be improved upon has only +to mount the fleet Arabian yonder' (the animal alluded to seized this +moment to stand on three legs, hang his head, and look dejected), +'and, giving him the rein, speed o'er the trackless plain which leads +to San Miguel, o'ertake the team, and re-pack the contents according +to her own satisfaction.' + +'No butter, nor eggs, nor fresh vegetables?' asked Margery. 'We +shall starve!' + +'Not at all,' quoth Jack. 'Polly will gracefully dispose a horse- +blanket about her shoulders, to shield her from the chill dews of the +early morn, mount the pack mule exactly at cock-crow everyday, and +ride to a neighbouring ranch where there are tons of the aforesaid +articles awaiting our consumption.' + +'Can you see me doing it, girls? Does it seem entirely natural?' +asked Polly, with great gravity. + +'Now hear my report as chairman of the committee of arrangements,' +said Geoffrey Strong, seating himself with dignity on a barrel of +nails. 'The tents, ropes, tool-boxes, bed-sacks, blankets, +furniture, etc., all went down on Monday's steamer, and I have a +telegram from Larry's Landing saying that they arrived in good order, +and that a Mexican gentleman who owns a mammoth wood-cart will take +them up to-morrow when we go ourselves. The procession will move at +one P.M., wind and weather permitting, in the following order:- + +'1. Chief Noble on his gallant broncho. + +'2. Commander Strong on his ditto, ditto. + +'3. Main conveyance or triumphal chariot, driven by Aide-de-Camp +John Howard, and carrying Dr. and Mrs. Winship, our most worshipful +and benignant host and hostess; Master Dick Winship, the heir- +apparent; three other young persons not worth mentioning; and four +cans of best leaf lard, which I omitted to put with the other +provisions. + +'4. Wood-cart containing baggage, driven by Senor Don Manuel Felipe +Hilario Noriega from Dead Wood Gulch. + +'5. One small tan terrier.' + +'Oh, Geoff, Geoff, pray do stop! it's too much!' cried the girls in a +fit of laughter. + +'Hurrah!' shouted Jack, tossing his hat into a tall eucalyptus-tree +in his excitement, 'Tent life for ever!' + +'Good-bye, ye pomps and vanities!' chanted Bell, kissing her hand in +imaginary farewell. 'Verily the noisy city shall know us no more, +for we depart for the green forests.' + +'And the city will not be as noisy WHEN you depart,' murmured Jack, +with an impudence that luckily passed unnoticed. + +'If Elsie could only come too!' sighed Polly. + + +Wednesday morning dawned as bright and beautiful as all mornings are +wont to dawn in Southern California. A light mist hung over the old +adobe mission church, through which, with its snow-white towers and +cold, clear-cut lines, it rose like a frozen fairy castle. Bell +opened her sleepy eyes with the very earliest birds, and running to +the little oval window, framed with white-rose vines, looked out at +the new day just creeping up into the world. + +'Oh dear and beautiful home of mine, how charming, how charming you +are! I wonder if you are not really Paradise!' she said, dreamily; +and the marvel is that the rising sun did not stop a moment in sheer +surprise at the sight of this radiant morning vision; for the oval +window opening to the east was a pretty frame, with its outline +marked by the dewy rose-vine covered with hundreds of pure, half- +opened buds and swaying tendrils, and she stood there in it, a fair +image of the morning in her innocent white gown. Her luminous eyes +still mirrored the shadowy visions of dreamland, mingled with dancing +lights of hope and joyful anticipation; while on her fresh cheeks, +which had not yet lost the roundness of childhood, there glowed, as +in the eastern skies, the faint pink blush of the morning. + +The town is yet asleep, and in truth it is never apt to be fairly +wide awake. The air is soft and balmy; the lovely Pacific, a +quivering, sparkling sheet of blue and grey and green flecked with +white foam, stretches far out until it is lost in the rosy sky; and +the mountains, all purple and pink and faint crimson and grey, stand +like sentinels along the shore. The scent of the roses, violets, and +mignonette mingled with the cloying fragrance of the datura is heavy +in the still air. The bending, willowy pepper-trees show myriad +bunches of yellow blossoms, crimson seed-berries, and fresh green +leaves, whose surface, not rain-washed for months, is as full of +colour as ever. The palm-trees rise without a branch, tall, slender, +and graceful, from the warmly generous earth, and spread at last, as +if tired of their straightness, into beautiful crowns of fans, which +sway toward each other with every breath of air. Innumerable +butterflies and humming-birds, in the hot, dazzling sunshine of +noonday, will be hovering over the beds of sweet purple heliotrope +and finding their way into the hearts of the passion-flowers, but as +yet not the faintest whirr of wings can be heard. Looking eastward +or westward, you see either brown foot-hills, or, a little later on, +emerald slopes whose vines hang heavy with the half-ripened grapes. + +And hark! A silvery note strikes on the dewy stillness. It is the +mission bell ringing for morning mass; and if you look yonder you may +see the Franciscan friars going to prayers, with their loose grey +gowns, their girdle of rope, their sandaled feet, and their jingling +rosaries; and perhaps a Spanish senorita, with her trailing dress, +and black shawl loosely thrown over her head, from out the folds of +which her two dark eyes burn like gleaming fires. A solitary Mexican +gallops by, with gayly decorated saddle and heavily laden saddle-bags +hanging from it; perhaps he is taking home provisions to his wife and +dark-eyed babies who live up in a little dimple of the mountain side, +almost hidden from sight by the olive-trees. And then a patient, +hardy little mustang lopes along the street, bearing on his back +three laughing boys, one behind the other, on a morning ride into +town from the mesa. + +The mist had floated away from the old mission now, the sun has +climbed a little higher, and Bell has come away from the window in a +gentle mood. + +'Oh, Polly, I don't see how anybody can be wicked in such a +beautiful, beautiful world.' + +'Humph!' said Polly, dipping her curly head deep into the water-bowl, +and coming up looking like a little drowned kitten. 'When you want +to be hateful, you don't stop to think whether you're looking at a +cactus or a rosebush, do you?' + +'Very true,' sighed Bell, quite silenced by this practical +illustration. 'Now I'll try the effect of the landscape on my temper +by dressing Dicky, while he dances about the room and plays with his +tan terrier.' + +But it happened that Dicky was on his very best behaviour, and stood +as still as a signpost while being dressed. It is true he ate a +couple of matches and tumbled down-stairs twice before breakfast, so +that after that hurried meal Bell tied him to one of the verandah +posts, that he might not commit any act vicious enough to keep them +at home. As he had a huge pocket full of apricots he was in perfect +good-humour, not taking his confinement at all to heart, inasmuch as +it commanded a full view of the scene of action. His amiability was +further increased, moreover, by the possession of a bright new +policeman's whistle, which was carefully tied to his button-hole by a +neat little silk cord, and which his fond parents intended that he +should blow if he chanced to fall into danger during his rambles +about the camp. We might as well state here, however, that this +precaution proved fruitless, for he blew it at all times and seasons; +and everybody became so hardened to its melodious shriek that they +paid no attention to it whatever,--history, or fable, thus again +repeating itself. + +Mr. and Mrs. Noble had driven Margery and Phil into town from the +fruit ranch, and were waiting to see the party off. + +Mrs. Oliver was to live in the Winship house during the absence of +the family, and was aiding them to do those numberless little things +that are always found undone at the last moment. She had given her +impetuous daughter a dozen fond embraces, smothering in each a gentle +warning, and stood now with Mrs. Winship at the gate, watching the +three girls, who had gone on to bid Elsie good-bye. + +'I hope Pauline won't give you any trouble,' she said. 'She is so +apt to be too impulsive and thoughtless.' + +'I shall enjoy her,' said sweet Aunt Truth, with that bright, cordial +smile of hers that was like a blessing. 'She has a very loving +heart, and is easily led. How pretty the girls look, and how +different they are! Polly is like a thistledown or a firefly, +Margery like one of our home Mayflowers, and I can't help thinking my +Bell like a sunbeam.' + +The girls did look very pretty; for their mothers had fashioned their +camping-dresses with much care and taste, taking great pains to make +them picturesque and appropriate to their summer life 'under the +greenwood tree.' + +Over a plain full skirt of heavy crimson serge Bell wore a hunting +jacket and drapery of dark leaf-green, like a bit of forest against a +sunset. Her hair, which fell in a waving mass of burnished +brightness to her waist, was caught by a silver arrow, and crowned by +a wide soft hat of crimson felt encircled with a bird's breast. + +Margery wore a soft grey flannel, the colour of a dove's throat, +adorned with rows upon rows of silver braid and sparkling silver +buttons; while her big grey hat had nothing but a silver cord and +tassel tied round it in Spanish fashion. + +Polly was all in sailor blue, with a distractingly natty little +double-breasted coat and great white rolling collar. Her hat swung +in her hand, as usual, showing her boyish head of sunny auburn curls, +and she carried on a neat chatelaine a silver cup and little clasp- +knife, as was the custom in the party. + +'It's very difficult,' Polly often exclaimed, 'to get a dress that +will tone down your hair and a hat that will tone up your nose, when +the first is red and the last a snub! My nose is the root of all +evil; it makes people think I'm saucy before I say a word; and as for +my hair, they think I must be peppery, no matter if I were really as +meek as Moses. Now there's Margery, the dear, darling mouse! People +look at her two sleek braids, every hair doing just what it ought to +do and lying straight and smooth, and ask, "Who is that sweet girl?" +There's something wrong somewhere. I ought not to suffer because of +one small, simple, turned-up nose and a head of hair which reveals +the glowing tints of autumn, as Jack gracefully says.' + +'Here they come!' shouted Jack from the group on the Howards' piazza. +'Christopher Columbus, what gorgeousness! The Flamingo, the Dove, +and the Blue-jay! Good-morning, young ladies; may we be allowed to +travel in the same steamer with your highnesses?' + +'You needn't be troubled,' laughed Bell. 'We shall not disclose +these glories until we reach the camp. But you are dressed as usual. +What's the matter?' + +'Why, the fact is,' answered Geoffrey, 'our courage failed us at the +last moment. We donned our uniforms, and looked like brigands, +highway robbers, cowboys, firemen,--anything but modest young men; +and as it was too warm for ulsters, we took refuge in civilised +raiment for to-day. When we arrive, you shall behold our dashing +sombreros fixed up with peacock feathers, and our refulgent shirts, +which are of the most original style and decoration.' + +'Aboriginal, in fact,' said Jack. 'We have broad belts of alligator +skin, pouches, pistols, bowie-knives, and tan-coloured shoes; but we +dislike to flaunt them before the eyes of a city public.' + +'Here they are!' cried Geoffrey, from the gate. 'Uncle, and aunt, +and Dicky, and--good gracious! Is he really going to take that +wretched tan terrier?' + +'Won't go without him,' said Bell, briefly. 'There are cases where +it is better to submit than to fight.' + +So the last good-byes were said, and Elsie bore up bravely; better, +indeed, than the others, who shed many a furtive tear at leaving her. +'Make haste and get well, darling,' whispered the girls, lovingly. + +'Pray, pray, dear Mrs. Howard, bring her down to us as soon as +possible. We'll take such good care of her,' teased Bell, with one +last squeeze, and strong signs of a shower in both eyes. + +'Come, girls and boys,' said kind Dr. Paul, 'the steamer has blown +her first whistle, and we must be off.' + +Oh, how clear and beautiful a day it was, and how charmingly gracious +Dame Ocean looked in her white caps and blue ruffles! Even the +combination steamboat smell of dinner, oil, and close air was +obliterated by the keen sea-breeze. + +The good ship Orizaba ploughed her way through the sparkling, sun-lit +waves, traversing quickly the distance which lay between the young +people and their destination. They watched the long white furrow +that stretched in her wake, the cloud of black smoke which floated +like a dark shadow above the laughing crests of the waves, and the +flocks of sea-gulls sailing overhead, with wild shrill screams ever +and anon swooping down for some bit of food flung from the ship, and +then floating for miles on the waves. + +How they sung 'Life on the Ocean Wave,' 'Bounding Billow,' and +'Rocked in the Cradle of the Deep!' How Jack chanted, - + + + 'I wish I were a fish, + With a great long tail; + A tiny little tittlebat, + A wiggle or a whale, +In the middle of the great blue sea. Oh, my!' + + +'Oh, how I long to be there!' exclaimed Philip, 'to throw aside all +the formal customs of a wicked world I abhor, and live a free life +under the blue sky!' + +'Why, Philip Noble! I never saw you inside of a house in my life,' +cried Polly. + +'Oh, yes; you're mistaken. I've been obliged to eat most of my meals +in the house, and sleep there; but I don't approve of it, and it's a +trial to be borne with meekness only when there's no remedy for it.' + +'Besides,' said Jack, 'even when we are out-of-doors we are shelling +the reluctant almond, poisoning the voracious gopher, pruning grape- +vines, and "sich." Now I am only going to shoot to eat, and eat to +shoot!' + +'Hope you've improved since last year, or you'll have a low diet,' +murmured Phil, in an undertone. + +'The man of genius must expect to be the butt of ridicule,' sighed +Jack, meekly. + +'But you'll not repine, although your heartstrings break, will you?' +said Polly, sympathisingly; 'especially in the presence of several +witnesses who have seen you handle a gun.' + +'How glad I am that I'm too near-sighted to shoot,' said Geoffrey, +taking off the eye-glasses that made him look so wise and dignified. +'I shall lounge under the trees, read Macaulay, and order the meals.' + +'I shall need an assistant about the camp,' said Aunt Truth, +smilingly; 'but I hardly think he'll have much time to lounge; when +everything else fails, there's always Dicky, you know.' + +Geoffrey looked discouraged. + +'And, furthermore, I declare by the nose of the great Tam o' Shanter +that I will cut down every tree in the vicinity ere you shall lounge +under it,' said Jack. + +'Softly, my boy. Hill's blue-gum forest is not so very far away. +You'll have your hands full,' laughed Dr. Paul. + +Here Margery and Bell joined the group after a quick walk up and down +the deck. + +'Papa,' said Bell, excitedly, 'we certainly are nearing the place. +Do you see that bend in the shore, and don't you remember that the +landing isn't far below?' + +'Bell's bump of locality is immense. There are nineteen bends in the +shore exactly like that one before we reach the landing. How many +knots an hour do you suppose this ship travels, my fair cousin?' +asked Geoffrey. + +'I could tell better,' replied Bell calmly, 'if I could ever remember +how many knots made a mile, or how many miles made a knot; but I +always forget.' + +'Oh, see! There's a porpoise!' cried Jack. 'Polly, why is a +porpoise like a water-lily?' + +But before he could say 'Guess,' Phil, Geoff, and the girls had drawn +themselves into a line, and, with a whispered 'One, two, three,' to +secure a good start, replied in concert, 'We-give-it-up!' + +'What a deafening shout!' cried Aunt Truth, coming out of the cabin. +'What's the matter, pray?' + +'Nothing, aunty,' laughed Polly. 'But we have formed a society for +suppressing Jack's conundrums, and this is our first public meeting. +How do you like the watchword?' + +Aunt Truth smiled. 'It was very audible,' she said. 'Yours is +evidently not a secret society.' + +'I wish I could find out who originated this plan,' quoth Jack, +murderously. 'But I suppose it's one of you girls, and I can't +revenge myself. Oh, when will this barrier between the sexes be +removed!' + +'I trust not in your lifetime,' shuddered Polly, 'or we might as well +begin to "stand round our dying beds" at once.' + + + +CHAPTER II: THE JOURNEY + + + +'Away, away, from men and towns, +To the wild wood and the downs, +To the silent wilderness.' + + +Whatever the distance was in reality, the steamer had consumed more +time than usual, and it was quite two o'clock, instead of half-past +twelve, as they had expected, before they were landed on the old and +almost forgotten pier, and saw the smoke of the Orizaba as she +steamed away. + +After counting over their bags and packages to see if anything had +been forgotten, they looked about them. + +There was a dirty little settlement, a mile or two to the south, +consisting of a collection of tumble-down adobe houses which looked +like a blotch on the brown hillside; a few cattle were browsing near +by, and the locality seemed to be well supplied with lizards, which +darted over the dusty ground in all directions. But the startling +point of the landscape was that it showed no sign of human life, and +Pancho's orders had been to have Senor Don Manuel Felipe Hilario +Noriega and his wood-cart on hand promptly at half-past twelve. + +'Can Pancho have forgotten?' + +'Can he have lost his way and never arrived here at all?' + +'Can Senor Don Manuel Felipe Hilario Noriega have grown tired of +waiting and gone off?' + +'Has Senor Don Manuel Felipe Hilario Noriega been drinking too much +aguardiente and so forgotten to come?' + +'Has Pancho been murdered by highway robbers, and served up into stew +for their evening meal?' + +'With Hop Yet for dessert! Oh, horrible!' These were some of the +questions and exclamations that greeted the ears of the lizards, and +caused them to fly over the ground in a more excited fashion than +ever. + +'One thing is certain. If Pancho has been stupid enough to lose his +way coming fifty miles down the coast, I'll discharge him,' said Dr. +Winship, with decision. + +'When you find him,' added Aunt Truth, prudently. + +'Of course. But really, mamma, this looks discouraging; I am afraid +we can't get into camp this evening. Shall we go up to the nearest +ranch house for the night, and see what can be done to-morrow?' + +'Never!' exclaimed the young people, with one deafening shout. + +'Never,' echoed Philip separately. 'I have vowed that a bed shall +not know me for three months, and I'll keep my vow.' + +'What do you say to this, Uncle Doc?' said Geoffrey. 'Suppose you go +up to the storehouse and office,--it's about a mile,--and see if the +goods are there all right, and whether the men saw Pancho on his way +up to the canyon. Meanwhile, Phil and I will ride over here +somewhere to get a team, or look up Senor Don Manuel Felipe Hilario +Noriega. Jack can stay with Aunt Truth and the girls, to watch +developments.' + +'But, papa, can't we pitch the camp to-night, somehow?' asked Bell, +piteously. + +'I don't see how. We are behindhand already; and if we get started +within an hour we can't reach the ground I selected before dark and +we can't choose any nearer one, because if Pancho is anywhere in +creation he is on the identical spot I sent him to.' + +'But, Dr. Paul, I'll tell you what we could do,' suggested Jack. 'If +we get any kind of a start, we can't fail to reach camp by seven or +eight o'clock at latest. Now it's bright moonlight, and if we find +Pancho, he'll have the baggage unloaded, and Hop Yet will have a fire +lighted. What's to prevent our swinging the hammocks for the ladies? +And we'll just roll up in our blankets by the fire, for to-night. +Then we'll get to housekeeping in the morning.' + +This plan received a most enthusiastic reception. + +'Very well,' replied the Doctor. 'If you are all agreed, I suppose +we may as well begin roughing it now as at any time.' + +You may have noticed sometimes, after having fortified yourself +against a terrible misfortune which seemed in store for you, that it +didn't come, after all. Well, it was so in this case; for just as +Dr. Winship and the boys started out over the hillside at a brisk +pace, an immense cloud of dust, some distance up the road, attracted +their attention, and they came to a sudden standstill. + +The girls held their breath in anxious expectation, and at length +gave an irrepressible shout of joy and relief when there issued from +the dense grey cloud the familiar four-horse team, with Daisy, Tule +Molly, Villikins, and Dinah, looking as fresh as if they had not been +driven a mile, tough little mustangs that they were. + +A long conversation in Spanish ensued, which, being translated by Dr. +Winship, furnished all necessary information concerning the delay. + +S. D. M. F. H. N. stated that Pancho was neither faithless nor +stupid, but was waiting for them on the camping-ground, and that as +the goods were already packed in his wood-cart he would follow them +immediately. So the whole party started without more delay; Dr. and +Mrs. Winship, Master Paul, Jack Howard, and the three girls riding in +the wagon, while Geoffrey and Philip galloped ahead on horseback. + +It was a long, dusty, tiresome ride; and Dicky, who had been as good +all day as any saint ever carved in marble and set in a niche, grew +rather warm, cross, and hungry, although he had been consuming +ginger-snaps and apricots since early morning. After asking +plaintively for the fiftieth time how long it would be before dinner, +he finally succumbed to his weariness, and dropping his yellow head, +that was like a cowslip ball, in his mother's lap, he fell asleep. + +But the young people, whose eyes were not blinded by hunger and +sleep, found more than enough to interest them on this dusty +California road, winding as it did through grand old growths of +trees, acres and acres of waving grain, and endless stretches of +gorgeous yellow mustard, the stalks of which were five or six feet +high, almost hiding from view the boys who dashed into the golden +forest from time to time. + +At the foot of the hill they passed an old adobe hut, with a crowd of +pretty, swarthy, frowzy Mexican children playing in the sunshine, +while their mother, black-haired and ample of figure, occupied +herself in hanging great quantities of jerked beef on a sort of +clothes-line running between the eucalyptus-trees. + +The father, a wild-looking individual in a red shirt and enormous +hat, came from behind the hut, unhitched the stout little broncho +tied to the fence, gave the poor animal a desperately tight 'cinch,' +threw himself into the saddle without touching his foot to the +lumbering wooden stirrups, and, digging his spurs well into the +horse's sides, was out of sight in an instant, leaving only a huge +cloud of dust to cover his disappearance. + +'How those fellows do ride!' exclaimed Dr. Winship, savagely. 'I +wish they were all obliged to walk until they knew how to treat a +horse.' + +'Then they'd walk straight into the millennium,' said Jack, sagely, +'for their cruelty seems to be an instinct.' + +'But how beautifully they ride, too!' said Polly. 'Mamma and I were +sitting on the hotel piazza the other day, watching two young +Spaniards who were performing feats of horsemanship. They dropped +four-bit pieces on the dusty road, and riding up to them at full +speed clutched them from the ground in some mysterious way that was +perfectly wonderful. Then Nick Gutierrez mounted a bucking horse, +and actually rolled and lighted a cigarette while the animal bucked +with all his might.' + +'See that cunning, cunning muchachita, mamma!' cried Bell; for, as +they stopped at the top of the hill to let the horses breathe, one of +the little Mexican children ran after them, holding out a handful of +glowing yellow poppies. + +She was distractingly pretty, with a beauty that is short-lived with +the people of her race. The afternoon sun shone down fiercely on her +waving coal-black locks, and brought a rich colour to her nut-brown +cheek; she had one little flimsy, ragged garment, neither long, +broad, nor thick, which hung about her picturesquely; and, with her +soft, dark, sleepy eyes, the rows of little white teeth behind her +laughing red mouth, and the vivid yellow blossoms in her tiny +outstretched hand, she was a very charming vision. + +'Como te llamas, muchachita?' (What is your name, little one?) asked +Bell, airing her Spanish, which was rather good. + +'Teresita,' she answered, with a pretty accent, as she scratched a +set of five grimy little toes to and fro in the dusty ground. + +'Throw her a bit, papa,' whispered Bell; and, as he did so, Teresita +caught the piece of silver very deftly, and ran excitedly back to the +centre of the chattering group in front of the house. + +'How intense everything is in California! Do you know what I mean, +mamma?' said Bell. 'The fruit is so immense, the canyons so deep, +the trees so big, the hills so high, the rain so wet, and the drought +so dry.' + +'The fleas so many, the fleas so spry,' chanted Jack, who had +perceived that Bell was talking in rhyme without knowing it. +'California is just the place for you, Bell; it gives you a chance +for innumerable adjectives heaped one on the other.' + +'I don't always heap up adjectives,' replied Bell, with dignity. +'When I wish to describe you, for instance, I simply say "that +hateful boy," and let it go at that.' + +Jack retired to private life for a season. + +'I'd like to paint a picture of Teresita,' said Margery, who had a +pretty talent for sketching, 'and call it The Summer Child, or some +such thing. I should think the famous old colour artists might have +loved to paint this gorgeous flame-tinted poppy.' + +'Not poppy,--eschscholtzia,' corrected Jack, coming rapidly to the +surface again, after Bell's rebuke, and delivering himself of the +tongue-confusing word with a terrible grimace. + +'I'm not writing a botany,' retorted Margery; 'and I can never +remember that word, much less spell it. I don't see how it grows +under such an abominable Russian name. It's worse than +ichthyosaurus. Do you remember that funny nonsense verse? - + + +"I is for ichthyosaurus, +Who lived when the world was all porous; + But he fainted with shame + When he first heard his name, +And departed a long while before us."' + + +'The Spaniards are more poetic,' said Aunt Truth, 'for they call it +la copa de oro, the golden cup. Oh, see them yonder! It is like the +Field of the Cloth of Gold.' + +The sight would have driven a royal florist mad with joy: a hillside +that was a swaying mass of radiant bloom, a joyous carnival of vivid +colour, in which the thousand golden goblets, turned upward to the +sun, were dancing, and glowing, and shaming out of countenance the +purple and blue and pink masses which surrounded them on every side. + +'You know Professor Pinnie told us that every well-informed young +girl should know at least the flora of her own State,' said Jack, +after the excitement had subsided. + +'Well, one thing is certain: Professor Pinnie never knew the STATE +of his own flora, or at least he kept his wife sorting and arranging +his specimens all the time; and I think he's a regular old frump,' +said Polly, irreverently, but meeting Aunt Truth's reproving glance, +which brought a blush and a whispered 'Excuse me,' she went on, +'Well, what I mean is, he doesn't know any more than other people, +after all; for he cares for nothing but bushes and herbs and seeds +and shrubs and roots and stamens and pistils; and he can't tell +whether a flower is lovely or not, he is so crazy to find out where +it belongs and tie a tag round it.' + +'I must agree with Polly,' laughed Jack. 'Why, I went to ride with +him one day in the Cathedral Oaks, and he made me get off my horse +every five minutes to dig up roots and tie them to the pommel of his +old saddle, so that we came into town looking like moving herbariums. +The stable-man lifted him on to his horse when he started, I suppose, +and he would have been there yet if he hadn't been helped off. Bah!' +For Jack had a supreme contempt for any man who was less than a +centaur. + +By this time they had turned off the main thoroughfare, and were +travelling over a bit of old stage road which was anything but easy +riding. There they met some men who were driving an enormous band of +sheep to a distant ranch for pasture, which gave saucy Polly the +chance to ask Dr. Winship, innocently, why white sheep ate so much +more than black ones. + +He fell into the trap at once, and answered unsuspectingly, in a +surprised tone, 'Why, do they?' giving her the longed-for opportunity +to respond, 'Yes, of course, because there are so many more of 'em; +don't you see?' + +'You are behind the times, Dr. Paul,' said Jack. 'That's an ancient +joke. Just look at those sheep, sir. How many are there? Eight +hundred, say?' + +'Even more, I should think,--a thousand, certainly; and rather thin +they look, too.' + +'I should imagine they might,' said Bell, sympathetically. 'When I +first came to California I never could see how the poor creatures +found anything to eat on these bare, brown hillsides, until the +farmers showed me the prickly little burr clover balls that cover the +ground. But see, mamma! there are some tiny lambs, poor, tired, +weak-legged little things; I wonder if they will live through the +journey.' + +'Which reminds me,' said Jack, giving Villikins a touch of the whip, +'that nothing is so calculated to disturb your faith in and love for +lambs as life on a sheep ranch. Innocent! Good gracious! I never +saw such--such--' + +'Gasping, staggering, stuttering, stammering tom-fools,' interposed +Bell. 'That's what Carlyle called ONE Lamb,--dear Mr. "Roast Pig" +Charles; and a mean old thing he was, too, for doing it.' + +'Well, it is just strong enough to apply to the actual lamb; not the +lamb of romance, but the lamb of reality. You can't get him +anywhere; he doesn't know enough. He won't drive, he can't follow; +he's too stupid. Why, I went out for a couple of 'em once, that were +lost in the canyon. I found them,--that was comparatively easy; but +when I tried to get them home, I couldn't. At last, after infinite +trouble, I managed to drive them up on to the trail, which was so +narrow there was but one thing for a rational creature to do, and +that was to go ahead. Then, if you'll believe me, those idiots kept +bleating and getting under the horse's fore-feet; finally, one of +them, the champion simpleton, tumbled over into the canyon, and I +tied the legs of the other one together, and carried him home on the +front of my saddle.' + +'They are innocent, any way,' insisted Margery. 'I won't believe +they're not. I can't bear these people who interfere with all your +cherished ideas, and say that Columbus didn't discover America, and +Shakespeare wasn't Shakespeare, and William Tell didn't shoot the +apple.' + +'Nevertheless, I claim that the lamb is not half so much an emblem of +innocence as he is of utter and profound stupidity. There is that +charming old lyric about Mary's little lamb; I can explain that. +After he came to school (which was an error of judgment at the very +beginning), he made the rumpus, you know - + + +"And then the teacher turned him out, + But still he lingered nee-ar, +And waited patiently about + Till Mary did appee-ar." + + +Of course he did. He didn't know enough to go home alone. + + +"And then he ran to her and laid + His head upon her arr-um, +As if to say, 'I'm not afraid; + You'll keep me from all harr-um.'" + + +As if a lamb could be capable of that amount of reasoning! And then + + +"'What makes the lamb love Mary so? + The eager children cry; +'Why, Mary loves the lamb, you know,' + The teacher did reply." + + +And might have added that as Mary fed the lamb three times a day and +twice on Sundays, he probably not only knew on which side his daily +bread was buttered, but also who buttered it.' + +'Dreadful boy!' laughed Bell. 'Polly, pray lower the umbrella; we +are going to meet some respectable people, and we actually are too +dirty to be seen. I have really been eating dust.' + +'They must be equally dusty,' said Polly, sagely. 'Why, it is the +Burtons, from Tacitas ranch!' + +The Burton ranch wagon was drawn up, as its driver recognised Dr. +Winship, and he proceeded to cheer the spirits of the party by +telling them that he had passed Pancho two hours before, and that he +was busily clearing rubbish from the camping-ground. This was six +o'clock, and by a little after eight the weary, happy party were +seated on saddle-blankets and carriage-cushions round a cheery camp- +fire, eating a frugal meal, which tasted sweeter than nectar and +ambrosia to their keen appetites. + +The boys expressed their intention of spending the night in unpacking +their baggage and getting to rights generally, but Dr. Winship placed +a prompt and decisive veto on this proposition, and they submitted +cheerfully to his better judgment. + +Getting to bed was an exciting occupation for everybody. Dicky was +first tucked up in a warm nest of rugs and blankets, under a tree, +and sank into a profound slumber at once, with the happy +unconsciousness of childhood. His father completed the preparations +for his comfort by opening a huge umbrella and arranging it firmly +over his head, so that no falling leaf might frighten him and no +sudden gust of air blow upon his face. + +Bell stood before her hammock, and meditated. 'Well,' she said, +'going to bed is a simple matter after all, when you have shorn it of +all useless formalities. Let me see: I generally walk to and fro in +the room, eating a bunch of grapes or an orange, look out of the +window five or ten minutes, brush my hair, read my chapter in the +Bible, take my book and study Spanish five minutes, on the principle +of that abnormal woman who learned ninety-six languages while she was +waiting for the kettle to boil in the morning--' + +'Must have been a slow boiler,' interrupted Polly, wickedly. 'Seems +to me it would have been economy to sell it and buy a new one.' + +'Oh, Polly! you are so wilfully stupid! The kettle isn't the point-- +but the languages. Besides, she didn't learn all the ninety-six +while the kettle was boiling once, you know. + +'Oh, didn't she? That alters the case. Thank you,' said Polly, +sarcastically. + +'Now observe me,' said Bell. 'I have made the getting into a hammock +a study. I first open it very wide at the top with both hands; then, +holding it in that position, I gracefully revolve my body from left +to right as upon an imaginary swivel; meantime I raise my right foot +considerably from mother earth, with a view to passing it over the +hammock's edge. Every move is calculated, you perceive, and produces +its own share of the perfect result; the method is the same that +Rachel used in rehearsing her wonderful tragic poses. I am now +seated in the hammock, you observe, with both hands extending the net +from side to side and the right foot well in position; I now raise +the left foot with a swift but admirably steady movement, and I am-- +Help! Help!! Murder!!!' + +'In short, you are not in, but out,' cried Polly, in a burst of +laughter; for Bell had leaned too far to the right, and on bringing +the other foot in, with its 'swift but admirably steady' motion, she +gave a sudden lurch, pulled the hammock entirely over herself and +fell out head first on the other side, leaving her feet tangled in +its meshes. 'Shall we help her out, Meg? She doesn't deserve it, +after that pompous oration and attempt to show off her superior +abilities. Nevertheless, she always accepts mercy more gracefully +than justice. Heave ahoy, my hearties!' + +Bell was extricated, and looked sufficiently ashamed. + +'We are much obliged for the lesson,' said Margery, 'but the method +is open to criticism; so I think we'll manage in our ordinary savage +way. We may not be graceful or scientific, but we get in, which is +the main point.' + +The hammocks did not prove the easiest of nests, as the girls had +imagined. In fact, to be perfectly candid about the matter, the +wicked flea of California, which man pursueth but seldom catcheth, is +apt, on many a summer night, to interfere shamelessly with slumber. +On this particular night he was fairly rampant, perhaps because sweet +humanity on which to feed was very scarce in that canyon. + +'Good-night, girls!' called Jack, when matters seemed to be finally +settled for sleep. 'Bell, you must keep one eye open, for the +coyotes will be stealing down the mountain in a jiffy, and yours is +the first hammock in the path.' + +'Of course,' moaned Bell,--'that's why the girls gave me this one; +they knew very well that one victim always slakes the animals' thirst +for blood. Well, let them come on. I shiver with terror, but my +only hope is that I may be eaten in my sleep, if at all.' + + +'There was a young party named Bell, +Who slept out of doors for a spell; + When asked how she fared, + She said she was scared, +But otherwise doing quite well. + + +'How's that?' asked Jack. 'I shall be able to drive Bell off her own +field, with a little practice.' + +'Go to sleep!' roared Dr. Paul. 'In your present condition of mind +and body you are not fit for poetry!' + +'That's just the point, sir,' retorted Jack, slyly, 'for, you +remember, poets are not FIT, but nascitur,--don't you know?' and he +retired under his blanket for protection. + +But quiet seemed to be impossible: there were all sorts of strange +sounds; and the moon, too, was so splendid that they almost felt as +if they were lying beneath the radiance of a calcium light; while in +the dark places, midst the branches of thick foliage, the owls hooted +gloomily. If you had happened to be an owl in that vicinity, you +might have heard not only the feverish tossing to and fro of the +girls in the hammocks, but many dismal sighs and groans from Dr. +Winship and the boys; for the bare ground is, after all, more +rheumatic than romantic, and they too tumbled from side to side, +seeking comfort. + +But at midnight quiet slumber had descended upon them, and they +presented a funny spectacle enough to one open-eyed watcher. A long +slender sycamore log was extended before the fire, and constituted +their pillow; on this their heads reposed, each decorated with a +tightly fitting silk handkerchief; then came a compact, papoose-like +roll of grey blanket, terminated by a pair of erect feet, whose +generous proportions soared to different heights. There was a little +snoring, too; perhaps the log was hollow. + +At midnight you might have seen a quaintly despondent little figure, +whose curly head issued from a hooded cloak, staggering hopelessly +from a hammock, and seating herself on a mossy stump. From the +limpness of her attitude and the pathetic expression of her eyes, I +fear Polly was reviewing former happy nights spent on spring-beds; +and at this particular moment the realities of camping-out hardly +equalled her anticipations. Whatever may have been her feelings, +however, they were promptly stifled when a certain insolent head +reared itself from its blanket-roll, and a hoarse voice cackled, +'Pretty Polly! Polly want a canyon?' At this insult Miss Oliver +wrapped her drapery about her and strode to her hammock with the air +of a tragedy queen. + + + +CHAPTER III: LIFE IN THE CANYON--THE HEIR APPARENT LOSES HIMSELF + + + +'Know'st thou the land where the lemon-trees bloom, +Where the gold orange glows in the green thicket's gloom; +Where the wind, ever soft, from the blue heaven blows, +And groves are of myrtle, and olive, and rose?' + + +On the next morning, as we have seen, they named their summer home +Camp Chaparral, and for a week or more they were the very busiest +colony of people under the sun; for it takes a deal of hard work and +ingenuity to make a comfortable and beautiful dwelling-place in the +forest. + +The best way of showing you how they accomplished this is to describe +the camp after it was nearly finished. + +The two largest bedroom tents were made of bright awning cloth, one +of red and white, the other of blue and white, both gaily decorated +with braid. They were pitched under the same giant oak, and yet were +nearly forty feet apart; that of the girls having a canvas floor. +They were not quite willing to sleep on the ground, so they had +brought empty bed-sacks with them, and Pancho's first duty after his +arrival had been to drive to a neighbouring ranch for a great load of +straw. + +In a glorious tree near by was a 'sky parlour,' arranged by a few +boards nailed high up in the leafy branches, and reached from below +by a primitive ladder. This was the favourite sitting-room of the +girls by day, and served for Pancho's bedroom at night. It was +beautiful enough to be fit shelter for all the woodland nymphs, with +its festoons of mistletoe and wild grape-vines; but Pancho was rather +an unappreciative tenant, even going so far as to snore in the sacred +place! + +Just beyond was a card-room,--imagine it--in which a square board, +nailed on a low stump, served for a table, where Dr. Paul and the +boys played many a game of crib, backgammon, and checkers. Here, +too, all Elsie's letters were written and Bell's nonsense verses, and +here was the identical spot where Jack Howard, that mischievous +knight of the brush, perpetrated those modern travesties on the +'William Henry pictures,' for Elsie's delectation. + +The dressing-room was reached by a path cut through bushes to a +charming little pool. Here were unmistakable evidences of feminine +art: looking-glasses hanging to trees, snowy wash-cloths, each +bearing its owner's initials, adorning the shrubs, while numerous +towels waved in the breeze. Between two trees a thin board was +nailed, which appeared to be used, as nearly as the woodpeckers could +make out, as a toothbrush rack. In this, Philip, the skilful +carpenter, had bored the necessary number of holes, and each one +contained a toothbrush tied with a gorgeous ribbon. + +In this secluded spot Bell was wont to marshal every morning the +entire force of 'the toothbrush brigade'; and, conducting the drill +with much ingenuity, she would take her victims through a long series +of military manoeuvres arranged for the toothbrush. Oh, the +gaspings, the chokings and stranglings, which occurred when she +mounted a rock by the edge of the pool, and after calling in tones of +thunder, + + +'Brush, brothers, brush with care! +Brush in the presence of the commandaire!' + + +ordered her unwilling privates to polish their innocent molars to the +tune of 'Hail, Columbia,' or 'Auld Lang Syne'! And if they became +mutinous, it was Geoffrey who reduced them to submission, and ordered +them to brush for three mornings to the tune of 'Bluebells of +Scotland' as a sign of loyalty to their commander. + +As for the furnishing of the camp, there were impromptu stools and +tables made of packing-boxes and trunks, all covered with bright +Turkey-red cotton; there were no less than three rustic lounges and +two arm-chairs made from manzanita branches, and a Queen Anne +bedstead was being slowly constructed, day by day, by the ambitious +boys for their beloved Elsie. + +One corner of each tent was curtained off for a bath-room, another +for a clothes-press, and there were a dozen devices for comfort, as +Dr. Winship was opposed to any more inconvenience than was strictly +necessary. Dr. and Mrs. Winship and little Dicky occupied one tent, +the boys another, and the girls a third. + +When Bell, Polly, and Margery emerged from their tent on the second +morning, they were disagreeably surprised to see a large placard over +the front entrance, bearing the insolent inscription, 'Tent Chatter.' +They said nothing; but on the night after, a committee of two stole +out and glued a companion placard, 'Tent Clatter,' over the door of +their masculine neighbours. And to tell the truth, one was as well +deserved as the other; for if there was generally a subdued hum of +conversation in the one, there never failed to be a perfect din and +uproar in the other. + +Under a great sycamore-tree stood the dining-table, which consisted +of two long, wide boards placed together upon a couple of barrels; +and not far away was the brush kitchen, which should have been a work +of art, for it represented the combined genius of American, Mexican, +and Chinese carpenters, Dr. Winship, Pancho, and Hop Yet having +laboured in its erection. It really answered the purpose admirably, +and looked quite like a conventional California kitchen; that is, it +was ten feet square, and contained a table, a stove, and a Chinaman. + +The young people, by the way, had fought bitterly against the stove, +protesting with all their might against taking it. Polly and Jack +declared that they would starve sooner than eat anything that hadn't +been cooked over a camp-fire. Bell and Philip said that they should +stand in front of it all the time, for fear somebody would ride +through the canyon and catch them camping out with a stove. Imagine +such a situation; it made them blush. Margery said she wished people +weren't quite so practical, and wouldn't ruin nature by introducing +such ugly and unnecessary things. She intended to point the moral by +drawing a picture of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden,--Eve bending +over a cook-stove and Adam peeling apples with a machine. Geoffrey +scoffed at Margery's sentimentalism, put on his most trying air, and +declared that if he had his pork and onions served up 'hot and +reg'lar,' he didn't care how she had her victuals cooked. + +They were all somewhat appeased, however, when they found that Dr. +Winship was as anxious as they for an evening camp-fire, and merely +insisted upon the stove because it simplified the cookery. +Furthermore, being an eminently just man, he yielded so far as to +give them permission to prepare their own meals on a private camp- +fire whenever they desired; and this effectually stopped the +argument, for no one was willing to pay so heavy a price for effect. + +The hammocks, made of gaily-coloured cords, were slung in various +directions a short distance from the square tent, which, being the +family sitting-room, was the centre of attraction. It was arranged +with a gay canopy, twenty feet square. Three sides were made by +hanging full curtains of awning cloth from redwood rods by means of +huge brass rings. These curtains were looped back during the day and +dropped after dark, making a cosy and warm interior from which to +watch the camp-fire on cool evenings. + +As for the Canyon de Las Flores itself, this little valley of the +flowers, it was beautiful enough in every part to inspire an artist's +pencil or a poet's pen; so quiet and romantic it was, too, it might +almost have been under a spell,--the home of some sleepy, enchanted +princess waiting the magic kiss of a princely lover. It reached from +the ocean to the mountains, and held a thousand different pictures on +which to feast the eye; for Dame Nature deals out beauty with a +lavish hand in this land of perpetual summer, song, and sunshine. +There were many noble oak-trees, some hung profusely with mistletoe, +and others with the long, Spanish greybeard moss, that droops from +the branches in silvery lines, like water spray. Sometimes, in the +moonlight, it winds about the oak like a shroud, and then again like +a filmy bridal veil, or drippings of mist from a frozen tree. + +Here and there were open tracts of ground between the clumps of +trees, like that in which the tents were pitched,--sunny places, +where the earth was warm and dry, and the lizards blinked sleepily +under the stones. + +Farther up the canyon were superb bay-trees, with their glossy leaves +and aromatic odour, and the madrono, which, with its blood-red skin, +is one of the most beautiful of California trees, having an open +growth, like a maple, bright green lustrous leaves, and a brilliant +red bark, which peels off at regular seasons, giving place to a new +one of delicate pea-green. + +There were no birches with pure white skin, or graceful elms, or +fluffy pussy willows, but so many beautiful foreign things that it +would seem ungrateful to mourn those left behind in the dear New +England woods; and as for flowers, there are no yellow and purple +violets, fragile anemones, or blushing Mayflowers, but in March the +hillsides are covered with red, in April flushed with pink and blue, +in May brilliant with yellow blossoms; and in the canyons, where the +earth is moist, there are flowers all the year. + +And then the girls would never forgive me if I should forget the +superb yucca, or Spanish bayonet, which is as beautiful as a tropical +queen. Its tall, slender stalk has no twigs or branches, but its +leaves hang down from the top like bayonet-blades; and oh, there +rises from the centre of them such a stately princess of a flower, +like a tree in itself, laden with cream-white, velvety, fragrant +blossoms. + +The boys often climbed the hillsides and brought home these splendid +treasures, which were placed in pails of water at the tent doors, to +shed their luxuriant beauty and sweetness in the air for days +together. They brought home quantities of Spanish moss, and wild +clematis, and manzanita berries too, with which to decorate the +beloved camp; and even Dicky trotted back with his arms full of +gorgeous blossoms and grasses, which he arranged with great taste and +skill in mugs, bottles, and cans on the dining-table. + +Can't you see what a charming place it was? And I have not begun to +tell you the half yet; for there was always a soft wind stirring the +leaves in dreamy music, and above and through this whispered sound +you heard the brook splashing over its pebbly bed,--splashing and +splashing and laughing all it possibly could, knowing it would +speedily be dried up by the thirsty August sun. Every few yards part +of the stream settled down contentedly into a placid little pool, +while the most inquisitive and restless little drops flowed noisily +down to see what was going on below. The banks were fringed with +graceful alders and poison-oak bushes, vivid in crimson and yellow +leaves, while delicate maiden-hair ferns grew in miniature forests +between the crevices of the rocks; yet, with the practicality of +Chinese human nature, Hop Yet used all this beauty for a dish-pan and +refrigerator! + +Now, confess that, after having seen exactly how it looks, you would +like to rub a magic lamp, like Aladdin, and wish yourself there with +our merry young sextette. For California is a lovely land and a +strange one, even at this late day, when her character has been +nearly ruined by dreadful stories, or made ridiculous by foolish +ones. + +When you were all babies in long clothes, some people used to believe +that there were nuggets of gold to be picked up in the streets, and +that in the flowery valleys, flowing with milk and honey, there grew +groves of beet-trees, and forests of cabbages, and shady bowers of +squash-vines; and they thought that through these fertile valleys +strode men of curious mien, wild bandits and highway robbers, with +red flannel shirts and many pockets filled with playing-cards and +revolvers and bowie-knives; and that when you met these frightful +persons and courteously asked the time of day, they were apt to turn +and stab you to the heart by way of response. + +Now, some of these things were true, and some were not, and some will +never happen again; for the towns and cities no longer conduct +themselves like headstrong young tomboys out on a lark, but have +grown into ancient and decorous settlements some twenty-five or +thirty years old. + +Perhaps California isn't really so interesting since she began to +learn manners; but she is a land of wonders still, with her sublime +mountains and valleys; her precious metals; her vineyards and +orchards of lemons and oranges, figs, limes, and nuts; her mammoth +vegetables, each big enough for a newspaper story; her celebrated +trees, on the stumps of which dancing-parties are given; her +vultures; her grizzly bears; and her people, drawn from every nook +and corner of the map--pink, yellow, blue, red, and green countries. +And though the story of California is not written, in all its +romantic details, in the school-books of to-day, it is a part of the +poetry of our late American history, full of strange and thrilling +scenes, glowing with interest and dramatic fire. + +I know a little girl who crossed the plains in that great ungeneraled +army of fifteen or twenty thousand people that made the long and +weary journey to the land of gold in 1849. She tells her children +now of the strange, long days and months in the ox-team, passing +through the heat and dust of alkali deserts, fording rivers, and +toiling over steep mountains. She tells them how at night she often +used to lie awake, curled up in her grey blanket, and hear the men +talking together of the gold treasures they were to dig from the +ground--treasures, it seemed to her childish mind, more precious than +those of which she read in The Arabian Nights. And from a little +hole in the canvas cover of the old emigrant wagon she used to see +the tired fathers and brothers, worn and footsore from their hard +day's tramp, some sleeping restlessly, and others guarding the cattle +or watching for Indians, who were always expected, and often came; +and the last thing at night, when her eyes were heavy with sleep, she +peered dreamily out into the darkness to see the hundreds of gleaming +camp-fires, which dotted the plain as far as the eye could reach. + + +You will have noticed that this first week of camp-life was a quiet +one, spent mostly by the young people in getting their open-air home +comfortably arranged, making conveniences of all kinds, becoming +acquainted with the canyon so far as they could, and riding once or +twice to neighbouring ranches for hay or provisions. + +Dr. Winship believed in a good beginning; and, as this was not a +week's holiday, but a summer campaign, he wanted his young people to +get fully used to the situation before undertaking any of the +exciting excursions in prospect. So, before the week was over, they +began to enjoy sound, dreamless sleep on their hard straw beds, to +eat the plain fare with decided relish, to grow a little hardy and +brown, and quite strong and tough enough for a long tramp or +horseback ride. + +After a religious devotion to cold cream for a few nights, Polly had +signified her terrible intention of 'letting her nose go.' 'I disown +it!' she cried, peeping in her tiny mirror, and lighting up her too +rosy tints with a tallow candle. 'Hideous objick, I defy thee! Spot +and speckle, yea, burn to a crisp, and shed thy skin afterwards! I +care not. Indeed, I shall be well rid of thee, thou--h'm--thou-- +well, leopard, for instance.' + +One beautiful day followed another, each the exact counterpart of the +one that had preceded it; for California boys and girls never have to +say 'wind and weather permitting' from March or April until November. +They always know what the weather is going to do; and whether this is +an advantage or not is a difficult matter to settle conclusively. + +New England boys affirm that they wouldn't live in a country where it +couldn't rain any day it felt like it, and California lads retort +that they are glad their dispositions are not ruined by the freaks of +New England weather. At all events, it is a paradise for would-be +campers, and any one who should assert the contrary would meet with +energetic opposition from the loyal dwellers in Camp Chaparral. + +Bell returned one day from a walk which she had taken by herself, +while the other girls were off on some errand with the Doctor. After +luncheon she drew them mysteriously into the square tent, and lowered +the curtains. + +'What is it?' Polly whispered, with an anxious expression of +countenance. 'Have you lost your gold thimble again, or your temper, +or have you discovered a silver mine?' + +'I have found,' she answered mysteriously, 'the most beautifully +secret place you ever beheld. It will be just the spot for us to +write and study in when we want to be alone; or it will even do for a +theatre; and it is scarcely more than half a mile up the canyon.' + +'How did you find it?' asked Margery. + +'As I was walking along by the brookside, I saw a snake making its +way through the bushes, and--' + +'Goodness!' shrieked Polly, 'I shall not write there, thank you.' + +'Goose! Just wait a minute. I looked at it, and followed at a +distance; it was a harmless little thing; and I thought, for the fun +of it, I would just push blindly on and see what I should find, +because we are for ever walking in the beaten path, and I long for +something new.' + +'A bad instinct,' remarked Madge, 'and one which will get you into +trouble, so you should crush it in its infancy.' + +'Well, I took up my dress and ploughed through the chaparral, until I +came, in about three minutes of scratching and fighting, to an open +circular place about as large as this tent. It was exactly round, +which is the curious part of it; and in the centre was one stump, +covered with moss and surrounded by great white toadstools. How any +one happened to go in there and cut down a single tree I can't +understand, nor yet how they managed to bring out the tree through +the tangled brush. It is so strange that it seems as if there must +be a mystery about it.' + +'Certainly,' said Margery promptly. 'A tragedy of the darkest kind! +Some cruel wretch has cut down, in the pride and pomp of it beauty, +one sycamore-tree; its innocent life-blood has stained the ground, +and given birth to the white toadstools which mark the spot and +testify to the purity of the victim.' + +'Well,' continued Bell, impressively, 'I knew I could never find it +again; and I wanted so much you should see it that I took the ball of +twine we always carry, unrolled it, and dropped the thread all the +way along to the brookside, like Phrygia, or Melpomene, or Anemone, +or whatever her name was.' + +'Or Artesia, or Polynesia, or Euthanasia,' interrupted Polly. 'I +think the lady you mean is Ariadne.' + +'Exactly. Now we'll take papa to see it, and then we'll fit it up as +a retreat. Won't it be charming? We'll call it the Lone Stump.' + +'Oh, I like that; it makes me shiver!' cried Polly. 'I'm going to +write an ode to it at once. Ahem! It shall begin--let me see - + + +'O lonely tree, +What cruel "he" +Did lay thee low? +Tell us the facts; +Did cruel axe +Abuse thee so?' + + +'Sublime! Second verse,' said Bell slowly, with pauses between the +lines:- + + +'Or did a gopher, +The wicked loafer, +Gnaw at thy base, +And, doing so, +Contrive to go, +And leave no trace?' + + +'Oh dear!' sighed Margery; 'if you will do it, wait a minute. + + +'O toadstools white, +Pray give us light +Upon the question. +Did gopher gnaw, +And live in awe +Of indigestion?' + + +'Good!' continued Bell:- + + +'Or did a man +Malicious plan +The good tree's ruin, +And leave it so +Convenient low, +A seat for Bruin? + + +For travelling grizzlies, you know. We may go there and see a hungry +creature making a stump-speech, while an admiring audience of +grasshoppers and tarantulas seat themselves in a circle on the +toadstools.' + +'Charming prospect!' said Madge. 'I don't think I care to visit the +Lone Stump or pass my mornings there.' + +'Nonsense, dear child; it is just like every other part of the +canyon, only a little more lonely. It is not half a mile from camp, +and hardly a dozen steps from the place where the boys go so often to +shoot quail.' + +'Very well,' said the girls. 'We must go there to-morrow morning; +and perhaps we'd better not tell the boys,--they are so peculiar. +Jack will certainly interfere with us in some way, if he hears about +it.' + +'Now let us take our books and run down by the pool for an hour or +two,' said Bell. 'Papa and the boys are all off shooting, and mamma +is lying down. We can have a cool, quiet time; the sunshine is so +hot here by the tents.' + +Accordingly, they departed, as they often did, for one of the +prolonged chats in which school-girls are wont to indulge, and which +so often, too, are but idle, senseless chatter. + +These young people, however, had been fortunate in having the wisest +and most loving guardianship, so that all their happy young lives had +been spent to good purpose. They had not shirked study, and so their +minds were stocked with useful information; they had read carefully +and digested thoroughly whatever they had read, so that they +possessed a good deal of general knowledge. The girls were bright, +sensible, industrious little women, who tried to be good, too, in the +old-fashioned sense of the word; and full of fun, nonsense, and +chatter as they were among themselves, they never forgot to be modest +and unassuming. + +The boys were pretty well in earnest about life, too, with good +ambitions and generous aspirations. They had all been studying with +Dr. Winship for nearly two years; and that means a great deal, for he +was a real teacher, entering into the lives of his pupils, +sympathising with them in every way, and leading them, through the +study of nature, of human beings, and of God, to see the beauty and +meaning of life. + +Geoffrey Strong, of course, was older than the rest, having completed +his junior year at college; but Dr. Winship, who was his guardian, +thought it wiser for him to rest a year and come to him in +California, as his ambition and energy had already led him into +greater exertions than his age or strength warranted. He was now +studying medicine with the good Doctor, but would go back to the +'land of perpetual pie' in the fall and complete his college course. + +A splendid fellow he was,--so earnest, thoughtful, and wise; so +gravely tender in all his ways to Aunt Truth, who was the only mother +he had ever known; so devoted to Dr. Winship, who loved him as his +own elder son. + +What will Geoffrey Strong be as a man? The twig is bent, and it is +safe to predict how the tree will incline. His word will be as good +as his bond; he will be a good physician, for his eye is quick to see +suffering, and his hand ready to relieve it; little children with +feverish cheeks and tired eyes will love to clasp his cool, strong +sand; he will be gentle as a woman, yet thoroughly manly, as he is +now, for he has made the most of his golden youth, and every lad who +does that will have a golden manhood and a glorious old age. + +As for Philip Noble, he was a dear, good, trustworthy lad too; +kindly, generous, practical, and industrious; a trifle slow and +reserved, perhaps, but full of common sense,--the kind of sense +which, after all, is most uncommon. + +Bell once said: 'This is the difference between Philip and +Geoffrey,--one does, and the other is. Geoff is the real Simon-pure +ideal which we praise Philip for trying to be,'--a very good +description for a little maiden whose bright eyes had only looked +into life for sixteen summers. + +And now we come to Jack Howard, who never kept still long enough for +any one to write a description of him. To explain how he differed +from Philip or Geoffrey would be like bringing the Equator and the +Tropic of Cancer together for purposes of comparison. + +If there were a horseback ride, Jack rode the wildest colt, was +oftenest thrown and least often hurt; if a fishing-party, Jack it was +who caught all the fish, though he made more noise than any one else, +and followed no rules laid down in The Complete Angler. + +He was very often in trouble; but his misdemeanours were those of +pure mischief, and were generally atoned for when it was possible. +He excelled in all out-of-door sports. And indeed, if his prudence +had at all kept pace with his ability, he might have done remarkable +things in almost any direction; but he constantly overshot the mark, +and people looked to him for the dazzling brilliancy and uncertainty +of a meteor, but never for the steady glow of a fixed star. + +Just now, Jack was a good deal sobered, and appeared at his very +best. The teaching of Dr. Paul and the companionship of Geoffrey had +done much for him, while the illness of his sister Elsie, who was the +darling of his heart, acted constantly as a sort of curb upon him; +for he loved her with all the ardour and passion which he gave to +everything else. You might be fearful of Jack's high spirits and +riotous mirth, of his reckless actions and heedless jokes, but you +could scarcely keep from admiring the boy; for he was brave and +handsome and winsome enough to charm the very birds off the bush, as +Aunt Truth acknowledged, after giving him a lecture for some +misdemeanour. + +The three girls made their way a short distance up the canyon to a +place which they called Prospect Pool, because it was so entirely +shut in from observation. + +'Dear old Geoff!' said Bell, throwing her shawl over a rock and +opening her volume of Carlyle. 'He has gone all through this for me, +and written nice little remarks on the margin,--explanations and +things, and interrogations where he thinks I won't know what is meant +and had better find out,--bless his heart! What have you brought, +Margery? By the way, you must move your seat away from that clump of +poison-oak bushes; we can't afford to have any accidents which will +interfere with our fun. We have all sorts of new remedies, but I +prefer that the boys should experiment with them.' + +'It's the softest seat here, too,' grumbled Margery. 'We must get +the boys to cut these bushes down. Why, you haven't any book, you +lazy Polly. Are you going to sleep, or shall you chatter and prevent +our reading?' + +'Neither,' she answered. 'Here is a doughnut which I propose to send +down the red pathway of fate; and here a pencil and paper with which +I am going to begin our round-robin letter to Elsie.' + +'That's good! She has only had notes from Jack and one letter from +us, which, if I remember right, had nothing in it.' + +'Thanks! I wrote it,' sniffed Bell. + +'Well, I meant it had no news--no account of things, you know.' + +'No, I wouldn't descend to writing news, and I leave accounts to the +butcher.' + +'Stop quarrelling, girls! This is my plan: I will begin in my usual +rockety style, sometimes maliciously called the Pollyoliver method; +Margery will take up the thread sedately; Bell will plunge in with a +burst of enthusiasm and seventeen adjectives, followed by a verse of +poor poetry; Geoff will do the sportive or instructive, just as he +happens to feel; and Phil will wind up the letter by some practical +details which will serve as a key to all the rest. Won't it be a box +of literary bonbons for her to read in bed, poor darling! Let me +see! I represent the cayenne lozenges, sharp but impressive; Margery +will do for jujube paste, which I adore,--mild, pleasant, yielding, +delicious.' + +'Sticky and insipid!' murmured Madge, plaintively. + +'Not at all, my dear. Bell stands for the peppermints; Jack for +chocolates, "the ladies' delight"; Geoffrey for a wine-drop, +altogether good, but sweetest in its heart; Phil--let me see! Phil +is like--what is he like?' + +'No more like candy than a cold boiled potato,' said his sister. + +'He is candid,' suggested Bell. 'Let us call him rock-candy, pure, +healthful, and far from soft.' + +'Or marshmallow,' said Margery, 'good, but tough.' + +'Or caramel,' laughed Polly; 'it always sticks to a point.' + +'Thanks, gentle creatures,' said a voice from the bushes on the other +side of the pool, and Phil stalked out from his covert, like a +wounded deer. + +'How long have you been in there, villain?' cried Bell. + +'Ever since lunch; but I only waked from a sound sleep some twenty +minutes ago. I've heard a most instructive conversation--never been +more amused in my life; don't know whether I prefer being a cold +boiled potato or a ladies'-delight!' + +'You haven't any choice,' snapped Polly, a trifle embarrassed at +having been overheard. + +'I'm glad it was my own sister who called me a c. b. p. (the most +loathsome thing in existence, by the way), because sisters never +appreciate their brothers.' + +'I didn't call you a c. b. p.,' remonstrated Margery. 'I said you +were no more like candy than a c. b. p. There is a difference.' + +'Is there? My poor brain fails to grasp it. But never mind; I'll +forgive you.' + +'Listeners never hear good of themselves,' sighed Polly. + +'Are you writing a copy-book, Miss Oliver? I didn't want to listen; +it was very painful to my feelings, but I was too sleepy to move.' + +'And now our afternoon is gone, and we have not read a word,' sighed +little Margery. 'I never met two such chatterboxes as you and +Polly.' + +'And to hear us talk is a liberal education,' retorted Polly. + +'Exactly,' said Philip, dryly, 'Come, I'll take the books and shawls. +It's nearly five o'clock, and we shall hear Hop Yet blowing his lusty +dinner-horn presently.' + +'Why didn't you go off shooting with the others?' asked Margery. + +'Stayed at home so they'd get a chance to shoot.' + +'Why, do you mean you always scare the game away?' inquired Polly, +artlessly. + +'No; I mean that I always do all the shooting, and the others get +discouraged.' + +'Clasp hands over the bloody chasm,' said Bell, 'and let us smoke the +pipe of peace at dinner.' + +Philip and Bell came through the trees, and, as they neared the camp, +saw Aunt Truth sitting at the door of Tent Chatter, looking the very +picture of comfort, as she drew her darning-needle in and out of an +unseemly rent in one of Dicky's stockings. Margery and Polly came up +just behind, and dropped into her lap some beautiful branches of wild +azalea. + +'Did you have a pleasant walk, dears?' she asked. + +'Yes, indeed, dear auntie. Now, just hold your head perfectly still, +while we decorate you for dinner. We will make Uncle Doc's eyes +fairly pop with admiration. Have you been lonely without us?' + +'Oh, not a bit. You see there has been a good deal of noise about +here, and I felt as if I were not alone. Hop Yet has been pounding +soap-root in the kitchen, and I hear the sound of Pancho's axe in the +distance,--the Doctor asked him to chop wood for the camp-fire. Was +Dicky any trouble? Where is he?' + +'Why, darling mother, are you crazy?' asked Bell. 'If you think a +moment, he was in the hammock and you were lying down in the tent +when we started.' + +'Why, I certainly thought I heard him ask to go with you,' said Mrs. +Winship, in rather an alarmed tone. + +'So he did; but I told him it was too far.' + +'I didn't hear that; in fact, I was half asleep; I was not feeling +well. Ask Hop Yet; he has been in the kitchen all the afternoon.' + +Hop Yet replied, with discouraging tranquillity, 'Oh, I no know. I +no sabe Dicky; he allee time lun loun camp; I no look; too muchee +work. I chop hash--Dicky come in kitch'--make heap work--no good. I +tell him go long--he go; bime-by you catchum; you see.' Whereupon he +gracefully skinned an onion, and burst into a Chinese song, with +complete indifference as to whether Dicky lived or died. + +'Perhaps he is with Pancho; I'll run and see!' cried Polly, dashing +swiftly in the direction of the sky-parlour. But after a few minutes +she ran back, with a serious face. 'He's not there; Pancho has not +seen him since lunch.' + +'Well, I've just happened to think,' said pale Aunt Truth, 'that papa +came into the tent for some cartridges, after you left, and of course +he took Dick with him. I don't suppose it is any use to worry. He +always does come out right; and I have told him so many times never +on any account to go away from the camp alone that he surely would +not do it. Papa and the boys will be home soon, now. It is nearly +six o'clock, and I told them that I would blow the horn at six, as +usual. If they are too far away to hear it, they will know the time +by the sun.' + +'Well,' said Bell, anxiously, 'I hope it is all right. Papa is so +strict that he won't be late himself. Did all the boys go with him, +mamma?' + +'Yes, all but Philip.' + +'Oh, then Dicky must be with them,' said Margery, consolingly. +'Geoffrey always takes him wherever he can.' + +So the girls went into the tent to begin their dinner toilet, which +consisted in carefully brushing burrs and dust from their pretty +dresses, and donning fresh collars and stockings, with low ties of +russet leather, which Polly declared belonged only to the stage +conception of a camping costume; then, with smoothly brushed hair and +bright flower-knots at collar and belt, they looked charming enough +to grace any drawing-room in the land. + +The horn was blown again at six o'clock, Aunt Truth standing at the +entrance of the path which led up the canyon, shading her anxious +eyes from the light of the setting sun. - + +'Here they come!' she cried, joyously, as the welcome party appeared +in sight, guns over shoulder, full game-bags, and Jack and Geoff with +a few rabbits and quail hanging over their arms. + +The girls rushed out of the tent. Bell took in the whole group with +one swift glance, and then turned to her mother, who, like most +mothers, believed the worst at once, and grew paler as she asked: + +'Papa, where is little Dick?' + +'Dick! Why, my dear, he has not been out with us. What do you +mean?' + +'Are you sure you didn't take him?' faltered Aunt Truth. + +'Of course I am. Good heavens! Doesn't any one know where the child +is?' looking at the frightened group. + +'You know, uncle,' said Geoffrey, 'we started out at three o'clock. +I noticed Dicky playing with his blocks in our tent, and said good- +bye to him. Did you see him when you came back for the cartridges?' + +'Certainly I did; he called me to look at his dog making believe go +to sleep in the hammock.' + +'We girls went down to the pool soon after that,' said Bell, +tearfully. 'He asked to go with us, and I told him it was too far, +and that he'd better stay with mamma, who would be all alone. He +said "Yes" so sweetly I couldn't mistrust him. Oh, was it my fault, +papa? Please don't say it was!' and she burst into a passion of +sobs. + +'No, no, my child, of course it was not. Don't cry; we shall find +him. Go and look about the camp, Geoff, while we consider for a +minute what to do?' + +'If there is any fault, it is mine, for going to sleep,' said poor +Aunt Truth; 'but I never dreamed he would dare to wander off alone, +my poor little disobedient darling! What shall we do?' + +'Have you spoken to Pancho and Hop Yet?' asked Phil. + +'Yes; they have seen nothing.' + +Hop Yet just at this moment issued from his kitchen with an immense +platter of mutton-stew and dumplings, which he deposited on the +table. On being questioned again, he answered as before, with the +greatest serenity, intimating that Dicky would come home 'heap bime- +by' when he got 'plenty hungly.' He seemed to think a lost boy or +two in a family rather a trifle than otherwise, and wound up his +unfeeling remarks with the practical one, 'Dinner all leady; you no +eat mutton, he get cold! Misser Wins', I no find pickle; you +catchum!' + +'I don't believe he would care if we all died right before his eyes,' +muttered Polly, angrily. 'I should just like to see a Chinaman's +heart once, and find out whether it was made of resin, or cuttle- +fish, or what.' + +'Well,' said Phil, as Dr. Winship came through the trees from the +card-room, 'we must start out this instant, and of course we can find +him somehow, somewhere; he hasn't been gone over two hours, and he +couldn't walk far, that's certain. Now, Uncle Doc, shall we all go +different ways, and leave the girls here to see if he doesn't turn +up?' + +'Oh, papa,' cried Bell, do not leave us at home! We can hunt as well +as any one; we know every foot of the canyon. Let me go with Geoff, +and we'll follow the brook trail.' + +'Very well. Now, mamma, Pancho and I will go down to the main road, +and you wait patiently here. Make all the noise you can, children; +and the one who finds him must come back to the camp and blow the +horn. Hop Yet, we go now; if Dicky comes back, you blow the horn +yourself, will you?' + +'All light, boss. You eat um dinner now; then go bime-by; mutton +heap cold; you--' + +'Dinner!' shouted Jack. 'Confound your impudence! If you say dinner +again, I'll cut the queue off your stupid head.' + +'Good!' murmured Polly, giving a savage punch to her blue Tam o' +Shanter cap. + +'Jack, Jack!' remonstrated Aunt Truth. + +'I know, dear auntie; but the callous old heathen makes me so mad I +can't contain myself. Come, Margery, let's be off. Get your shawl; +and hurrah for the one who comes back to blow the horn first! I'll +wager you ten to one I'll have Dick in auntie's lap inside the +hour!'--at which Aunt Truth's eyes brightened, and she began to take +heart again. But as he tore past the brush kitchen and out into the +woods, dragging Madge after him at a breathless pace, he shut his +lips together rather grimly, saying, 'I'd give five hundred dollars +(s'posin' I had a cent) to see that youngster safe again.' + +'Tell me one thing, Jack,' said Margery, her teeth chattering with +nervousness; 'are there any animals in this canyon that would attack +him?' + +'Oh, of course it is possible that a California lion or a wild-cat +might come down to the brook to drink--they have been killed +hereabouts--but I hardly believe it is likely; and neither do I +believe they would be apt to hurt him, any way, for he would never +attack them, you know. What I am afraid of is that he has tumbled +over the rocks somewhere in climbing, or tangled himself up in the +chaparral. He couldn't have made off with a pistol, could he? He is +up to all such tricks.' + +Presently the canyon began to echo with strange sounds, which I have +no doubt sent the owls, birds, and rabbits into fits of terror; for +the boys had whistles and pistols, while Polly had taken a tin pan +and a hammer. She had gone with Phil out behind the thicket of +manzanita bushes, and they both stood motionless, undecided where to +go. + +'Oh, Phil, I can't help it; I must cry, I am so frightened. Let me +sit down a second. Yes, I know it's an ant-hill, and I shouldn't +care if it were a hornets' nest--I deserve to be stung. What do you +think I said to Margery this morning? That Dicky was a perfect +little marplot, and spoiled all our fun, and I wished he were in the +bottom of the Red Sea; and then I called him a k-k-k-ill-joy!' and +Polly buried her head in her blue Tam, and cried a good, honest, old- +fashioned cry. + +'There, chirk up, poor little soul, and don't you fret over a +careless speech, that meant nothing at all. I've wished him in the +Red Sea more than once, but I'm blessed if I ever do it again. Come, +let's go over yonder, where we caught the young owl; Dicky may have +wanted to try that little game again.' + +So they went on, calling, listening, then struggling on again, more +anxious every moment, but not so thoroughly dazed as Bell, who had +rocked her baby-brother in his cradle, and to whom he was the +embodiment of every earthly grace, if not of every heavenly virtue. + +'I might have known this would happen,' she said, miserably. 'He is +so careless that, if we ever find him again, we must keep him tied to +something.' + +'Take care of your steps, dear,' said Geoff, 'and munch this cracker, +or you won't have strength enough to go on with me. I wish it were +not getting so dark; the moment the sun gets behind these mountain- +tops the light seems to vanish in an instant.--Dick-y!' + +'Think of the poor darling out in this darkness--hungry, frightened, +and alone,' sighed Bell. 'It's past his bed-time now. Oh, why did +we ever come to stay in this horrible place!' + +'You must not blame the place, dear; we thought it the happiest in +the world this morning. Here we are by the upper pool, and the path +stops. Which way had we better go?' + +'I've been here before to-day,' said Bell; 'we might follow the trail +I made. But where is my string? Light a match, Geoff, please.' + +'What string? What do you mean?' + +'Why, I found a beautiful spot this morning, and, fearing I shouldn't +remember the way again, I took out my ball of twine and dropped a +white line all the way back, like Ariadne; but I don't see it. Where +can it have disappeared--unless Jack or Phil took it to tease me?' + +'Oh no; I've been with them all day. Perhaps a snake has swallowed +it. Come.' + +But a bright idea had popped into Bell's head. 'I want to go that +way, Geoff, dear; it's as good as any other, and there are flowers +just the other side, in an open, sunny place; perhaps he found them.' + +'All right; let's go ahead.' + +'The trouble is, I don't know which way to go. Here is the rock; I +remember it was a spotted one, with tall ferns growing beside it. +Now I went--let me see--this way,' and they both plunged into the +thick brush. + +'Bell, Bell, this is utter nonsense!' cried Geoff. 'No child could +crawl through this tangle.' + +'Dicky could crawl through anything in this universe, if it was the +wrong thing; he isn't afraid of beast, bird, or fish, and he +positively enjoys getting scratched,' said Bell. + +Meanwhile, what had become of this small hero, and what was he doing? +He was last seen in the hammock, playing with the long-suffering +terrier, Lubin, who was making believe go to sleep. It proved to be +entirely a make-believe; for, at the first loosening of Dicky's +strangling hold upon his throat, he tumbled out of the hammock and +darted into the woods. Dicky followed, but Lubin was fleet of foot, +and it was a desperate and exciting race for full ten minutes. + +At length, as Lubin heard his little master's gleeful laugh, he +realised that his anger was a thing of the past; consequently, he +wheeled about and ran into Dicky's outstretched arms, licking his +face and hands exuberantly in the joy of complete forgiveness. + +By this time the voice of conscience in Dicky's soul--and it was a +very, very still, small one on all occasions--was entirely silenced. +He strayed into a sunny spot, and picked flowers enough to trim his +little sailor hat, probably divining that this was what lost children +in Sunday-school books always did, and it would be dishonourable not +to keep up the superstition. Then he built a fine, strong dam of +stones across the brook, wading to and fro without the bother of +taking off his shoes and stockings, and filled his hat with rocks and +sunk it to the bottom for a wharf, keeping his hat-band to tie an +unhappy frog to a bit of bark, and setting him afloat as the captain +of a slave-ship. When, at length, the struggling creature freed +himself from his bonds and leaped into the pool, Dicky played that he +was a drowning child, and threw Lubin into the water to rescue him. + +In these merry antics the hours flew by unnoticed; he had never been +happier in his life, and it flashed through his mind that if he were +left entirely to himself he should always be good. + +'Here I've been a whole day offul good by my lone self; haven't said +one notty word or did one notty fing, nor gotted scolded a singul +wunst, did I, Lubin? I guess we better live here; bettent we, Lubin? +And ven we wunt git stuck inter bed fur wettin' our feets little +teenty mites of wet ev'ry singul night all the livelong days, will +we, Lubin?' + +But this was a long period of reflection for Master Dicky, and he +capered on, farther and farther, the water sozzling frightfully in +his little copper-toed boots. At length he sat down on a stone to +rest himself, and, glancing aimlessly about, his eyes fell on a white +string, which he grasped with alacrity, pulling its end from beneath +the stone on which he sat. + +'Luby Winship, the anjulls gaved me this string fur ter make an offul +splendid tight harness for you, little Luby; and you can drag big +heavy stones. Won't that be nice?' + +Lubin looked doubtful, and wagged his tail dissentingly, as much as +to say that his ideas of angel ministrations were a trifle different. + +But there was no end to the string! How very, very curious! Dicky +wound and wound and crept and crept along, until he was thoroughly +tired but thoroughly determined to see it through; and Lubin, +meanwhile, had seized the first convenient moment, after the mention +of the harness, to retire to the camp. + +At length, oh joy! the tired and torn little man, following carefully +the leading-string, issued from the scratching bushes into a clean, +beautiful, round place, with a great restful-looking stump in the +centre, and round its base a small forest of snowy toadstools. What +could be a lovelier surprise! Dicky clapped his hands in glee as he +looked at them, and thought of a little verse of poetry which Bell +had taught him: + + +'Some fairy umbrellas came up to-day +Under the elm-tree, just over the way, +And as we have had a shower of rain, +The reason they came is made very plain: +To-night is the woodland fairies' ball, +And drops from the elm-tree might on them fall, +So little umbrellas wait for them here, +And under their shelter they'll dance without fear. +Take care where you step, nor crush them, I pray, +For fear you will frighten the fairies away.' + + +'Oh!' thought Dicky, in a trance of delight, 'now I shall go to the +fairies' ball, and see 'em dance under the cunning little teenty +umberells; and wunt they be mad at home when nobuddy can't see 'em +but just only me! And then if that potry is a big whopper, like that +there uvver one--'laddin-lamp story of Bell's--I'll just pick evry +white toadstool for my papa's Sunday dinner, and she sha'n't never +see a singul fairy dance.' + +But he waited very patiently for a long, long time that seemed like +years, for Lubin had disappeared; and all at once it grew so dark in +this thickly-wooded place that Dicky's courage oozed out in a single +moment, without any previous warnings as to its intention. The +toadstools looked like the ghosts of little past-and-gone fairy +umbrellas in the darkness, and not a single fairy couple came to +waltz under their snowy canopies, or exchange a furtive kiss beneath +their friendly shadows. + +Dicky thought the situation exceedingly gloomy, and, without knowing +it, followed the example of many older people, who, on being deserted +by man, experienced their first desire to find favour with God. He +was not in the least degree a saintly child, but he felt +instinctively that this was the proper time for prayer; and not +knowing anything appropriate to the occasion, he repeated over and +over again the time-worn plaint of childhood:- + + +'Now I lay me down to sleep, +I pray the Lord my soul to keep; +If I should die before I wake, +I pray the Lord my soul to take. Amen.' + + +Like older mortals of feeble faith, he looked for an immediate and +practical answer, in the shape, perhaps, of his mother, with his +little night-gown and bowl of bread and milk. + +'My sakes alive!' he grumbled between his sobs, 'they're the meanest +fings I ever saw. How long do they s'pose I'm goin' to wait for 'em +in this dark? When the bears have et me up in teenty snips, then +they'll be saterfied, I guess, and wisht they'd tookened gooder care +of me--a little speck of a boy, lefted out in this dark, bear-y +place, all by his lone self. O--oo--oo--oh!' and he wound up with a +murderous yell, which had never failed before to bring the whole +family to his side. + +His former prayer seeming to be in vain, he found a soft place, +brushed it as clean as possible, and with difficulty bending his +little stiff, scratched body into a kneeling position, he prayed his +nightly postscript to 'Now I lay me': 'God bless papa, 'n' mamma, +'n' Bell, 'n' Jack, 'n' Madge, 'n' Polly, 'n' Phil, 'n' Geoff, 'n' +Elsie.' Then, realizing that he was in a perilous position, and it +behoved him to be as pious as possible, he added: 'And please bless +Pancho, 'n' Hop Yet, 'n' Lubin, 'n' the goat--not the wild goat up on +the hill, but my goat, what got sick to his stummick when I painted +him with black letters.' + +What a dreadful calamity, to be sure, if the wrong goat had been +blessed by mistake! His whole duty performed, he picked the +toadstools for his papa's Sunday dinner, and, leaning his head +against the lone stump, cried himself to sleep. + +But relief was near, though he little suspected it as he lay in the +sound, dreamless sleep which comes only to the truly good. There was +a crashing sound in the still darkness, and Bell plunged through the +thick underbrush with a cry of delight. + +'He is here! Dear, dear Geoff, he is all here! I knew it, I knew +it! Hurrah!--no, I mean--thank God!' she said softly as she stooped +down to kiss her mischievous little brother. + +'But what a looking creature!' exclaimed Geoff, as he stooped over +the recovered treasure. 'See, Bell, his curls are glistening with +pitch, his dress is torn into ribbons, and his hands--ugh, how +dirty!' + +'Poor little darling, he is thoroughly used up,' whispered Bell, +wiping tears of joy from her brown eyes. 'Now, I'll run home like +lightning to blow the horn; and you carry Dicky, for he is too sleepy +and stiff to walk; and, Geoff'--(here she laid an embarrassed hand on +his shoulder)--'I'm afraid he'll be awfully cross, but you'll not +mind it, will you? He's so worn-out.' + +'Not I,' laughed Geoff, as he dropped a brotherly kiss on Bell's pale +cheek. 'But I've no idea of letting you go alone; you're tired to +death, and you'll miss the path. I wish I could carry you both.' + +'Tired--afraid!' cried Bell, with a ringing laugh, while Dicky woke +with a stare, and nestled on Geoffrey's shoulder as if nothing had +happened. 'Why, now that this weight is lifted off my heart, I could +see a path in an untravelled forest! Good-bye, you dear, darling, +cruel boy! I must run, for every moment is precious to mamma.' And +with one strangling hug, which made Dicky's ribs crack, she dashed +off. + +Oh how joyously, how sweetly and tunefully, the furious blast of the +old cracked dinner-horn fell on the anxious ears in that canyon. It +seemed clearer and more musical than a chime of silver bells. + +In a trice the wandering couples had gathered jubilantly round the +camp-fire, all embracing Bell, who was the heroine of the hour-- +entirely by chance, and not though superior vision or courage, as she +confessed. + +It was hardly fifteen minutes when Geoff strode into the ring with +his sorry-looking burden, which he laid immediately in Aunt Truth's +lap. + +'Oh my darling!' she cried, embracing him fondly. 'To think you are +really not dead, after all!' + +'No, he is about as alive as any chap I ever saw.' And while the +happy parents caressed their restored darling, Geoff gathered the +girls and boys around the dinner-table, and repeated some of Dicky's +remarks on the homeward trip. + +It seems that he considered himself the injured party, and with great +ingenuity laid all the blame of the mishap on his elders. + +'Nobuddy takes care of me, anyhow,' he grumbled. 'If my papa wasn't +a mean fing I'd orter to have a black nurse with a white cap and +apurn, like Billy Thomas, 'n' then I couldn't git losted so offul +easy. An' you all never cared a cent about it either, or you'd a +founded me quicker 'n this--'n' I've been hungry fur nineteen hours, +'n' I guess I've been gone till December, by the feelin', but you was +too lazy to found me 'f I freezed to def--'n' there ain't but one +singul boy of me round the whole camp, 'n' 't would serveded you +right if I had got losted for ever; then I bet you wouldn't had much +fun Fourth of July 'thout my two bits 'n' my fire-crackers!' + +It was an hour or two before peace and quiet were restored to the +camp. The long-delayed dinner had to be eaten; and to Hop Yet's calm +delight, it was a very bad one. Dicky's small wounds were dressed +with sweet oil, and after being fed and bathed he was tucked lovingly +into bed, with a hundred kisses or more from the whole party. + +A little rest and attention had entirely restored his good-humour; +and when Dr. Paul went into the tent to see that all was safe for the +night, he found him sitting up in bed with a gleeful countenance, +prattling like a little angel. + +'We had an offul funny time 'bout my gittin' losted, didn't we, +mamma?' chuckled he, with his gurgling little laugh. 'Next time I'm +goin' to get losted in annover bran'-new place where no-bud-dy can +find me! I fink it was the nicest time 'cept Fourth of July, don't +you, mamma?' And he patted his mother's cheek and imprinted an oily +kiss thereon. + +'Truth,' said the Doctor, with mild severity, 'I know you don't +believe in applying the slipper, but I do think we should arrange +some plan for giving that child an idea of the solemnity of life. So +far as I can judge, he looks at it as one prolonged picnic.' + +'My sentiments exactly!' cried Bell, energetically. 'I can't stand +many more of these trying scenes; I am worn to a "shadder."' + +Dicky tucked his head under his mother's arm, with a sigh of relief +that there was one person, at least, whose sentiments were always +favourable and always to be relied upon. + +'I love you the best of anybuddy, mamma,' whispered he, and fell +asleep. + + + +CHAPTER IV: RHYME AND REASON + + + +A BUDGET OF LETTERS FROM THE CAMP MAIL-BAG + +'The letter of a friend is a likeness passing true.' + + +Our friend Polly was seated in a secluded spot whence all but her had +fled; her grave demeanour, her discarded sun-bonnet, her corrugated +brow, all bespoke more than common fixedness of purpose, the cause of +which will be discovered in what follows. + +I. FROM THE COUNTESS PAULINA OLIVERA TO HER FRIEND AND CONFIDANTE, +THE LADY ELSIE HOWARD. {1} + +Scene: A sequestered nook in the Valley of the Flowers. + +CAMP CHAPARRAL, July 6, 188-. + +The countess is discovered at her ommerlu {1a} writing-table. A +light zephyr {1b} plays with her golden locks {1c} and caresses her +Grecian {1d} nose--a nose that carries on its surface a few trifling +freckles, which serve but to call attention to its exquisite purity +of outline and the height of its ambition. Her eyes reflect the +changing shadows of moonlight, and her mouth is one fit for sweet +sounds; {1e} yet this only gives you a faint idea of the beauteous +creature whose fortunes we shall follow in our next number. {1f} + +I have given that style a fair trial, my dear darling, but I cannot +stand it another minute, not being familiar with the language of what +our cook used to call the 'fuddal aristocracy' (feudal, you know). + +I, your faithful Polly, am seated in the card-room, writing with a +dreadful pen which Phil gave me yesterday. Its internal organs are +filled with ink, which it disgorges when PRESSED to do so, but just +now it is 'too full for utterance,' as you will see by the blots. + +We have decided not to make this a real round-robin letter, like the +last, because we want to write what we like, and not have it read by +the person who comes next. + +I have been badgered to death over my part of the communication sent +to you last week, for the young persons connected with this camp have +a faculty of making mountains out of mole-hills, as you know, and I +have to suffer for every careless little speech. However, as we +didn't wish to bore you with six duplicate letters, we invented a +plan for keeping off each other's ground, and appointed Geoff a +committee of one to settle our line of march. It is to be a +collective letter, made up of individual notes; and these are Geoff's +sealed orders, which must be obeyed, on pain of dismissal from the +camp: + +No. 1 (Polly) is to amuse! +No. 2 (Phil) ... inform! +No. 3 (Geoff) ... edify!! +No. 4 (Madge) ... gossip. +No. 5 (Bell) ... versify. +No. 6 (Jack) ... illustrate + +So, my dear, if you get any 'information' or happen to be 'edified' +by what I write, don't mention it for worlds! (I just screamed my +fears about this matter to Jack, and he says 'I needn't fret.' I +shall certainly slap that boy before the summer is over.) + +I could just tell you a lovely story about Dicky's getting lost in +the woods the day before yesterday, and our terrible fright about +him, and how we all joined in the boy-hunt, until Geoff and Bell +found him at the Lone Stump; but I suppose the chronicle belongs to +Phil's province, so I desist. But what can I say? Suppose I tell +you that Uncle Doc and the boys have been shooting innocent, TAME +sheep, skinning and cutting them up on the way home, and making us +believe for two days that we were eating venison; and we never should +have discovered the imposition had not Dicky dragged home four sheep- +skins from the upper pool, and told us that he saw the boys 'PEELING +THEM OFF A VENISON.' Perhaps Phil may call this information, and +Margery will vow that it is gossip and belongs to her; any way, they +consider it a splendid joke, and chuckle themselves to sleep over it +every night; but I think the whole affair is perfectly maddening, and +it makes me boil with rage to be taken in so easily. Such a to-do as +they make over the matter you never saw; you would think it was the +first successful joke since the Deluge. (That wasn't a DRY joke, was +it? Ha, ha!) + +This is the way they twang on their harp of a thousand strings. At +breakfast, this morning, when Jack passed me the corn-bread, I said +innocently, 'Why, what have we here?' 'It is manna that fell in the +night,' answered Jack, with an exasperating snicker. 'You didn't +know mutton, but I thought, being a Sunday-school teacher, you would +know something about manna.' (N.B.--He alludes to that time I took +the infant class for Miss Jones, and they all ran out to see a +military funeral procession.) 'I wish you knew something about +manners,' snapped I; and then Aunt Truth had to warn us both, as +usual. Oh dear! it's a weary world. I'd just like to get Jack at a +disadvantage once! + +[Next paragraph crossed out] +We climbed Pico Negro yesterday. Bell, Geoff, Phil, and I had quite +an experience in losing the trail. I will tell you about it. Just +as - + +(Goodness me! what have I written? Oh, Elsie, pray excuse those +HORIZONTAL EVIDENCES of my forgetfulness and disobedience. I have +bumped my head against the table three times, as penance, and will +now try to turn my thoughts into right channels. This letter is a +black-and-white evidence that _I_ have not a frivolous order of mind, +and have always been misunderstood from my birth up to this date.) + +We have had beautiful weather since--but no, of course Phil will tell +you about the weather, for that is scarcely an amusing topic. I do +want to be as prudent as possible, for Uncle Doc is going to read all +the letters (not, of course, aloud) and see whether we have fulfilled +our specific obligations. + +(I just asked Bell whether 'specific' had a 'c' or an's in the +middle, and she answered '"c," of course,' with such an air, you +should have heard her! I had to remind her of the time she spelled +'Tophet' with an 'f' in the middle; then she subsided.) + +(I just read this last paragraph to Madge, to see if she called it +gossip, as I was going to take it out if it belonged to her topic, +but she said No, she didn't call it gossip at all--that she should +call it slander!) + +You don't know how we all long to see you, dear darling that you are. +We live in the hope of having you with us very soon, and meanwhile +the beautiful bedstead is almost finished, and a perfect success. (I +wish to withdraw the last three quarters of that sentence, for +obvious reasons!!) + +Dear, dear! Geoffrey calls 'Time up,' and I've scarcely said +anything I should. Never, never again will I submit to this method +of correspondence; it is absolutely petrifying to one's genius. When +I am once forced to walk in a path, nothing but the whole out-of- +doors will satisfy me. + +I'm very much afraid I haven't amused you, dear, - + + +But when I lie in the green kirkyard, +With the mould upon my breast, +Say not that 'She did well or ill,' +Only, 'She did her best.' + + +Now, do you think that will interfere with Bell, when it's only a +quotation? Any way, it's so appropriate that Uncle Doc will never +have the heart to strike it out. The trouble is that Geoff thinks +all the poetry in the universe is locked up in Bell's head, and if +she once allows it to escape, Felicia Hemans and the rest will be too +discouraged ever to try again! (I can't remember whether F. H. is +alive or not, and am afraid to ask, but you will know that I don't +mean to be disrespectful.) + +Laura, Anne, and Scott Burton were here for the play, and Laura is +coming down again to spend the week. I can't abide her, and there +will probably be trouble in the camp. + +The flame of my genius blazes high just now, but Geoff has spoken, +and it must be snuffed. So good-bye! + +Sizz-z-z!! and I'm OUT! + +POLLIOLIVER. + + +II. FROM PHILIP TO ELSIE. + + +CAMP CHAPARRAL, July 8, 188-. + +My dear Elsie,--I believe I am to inform you concerning the daily +doings of our party, not on any account, however, permitting myself +to degenerate into 'gossip' or 'frivolous amusement.' + +They evidently consider me a quiet, stupid fellow, who will fulfil +such a task with no special feeling of repression, and I dare say +they are quite right. + +They call me the 'solid man' of the camp, which may not be very high +praise, to be sure, as Geoffrey carries his head in the clouds, and +Jack is--well, Jack is Jack! So, as the light of a tallow dip is +valuable in the absence of sun and moon, I am raised to a fictitious +reputation. + +We fellows have had very little play so far, for the furnishing of +the camp has proved an immense undertaking, although we have plenty +of the right sort of wood and excellent tools. + +We think the work will pay, however, as Dr. Paul has about decided to +stay until October, or until the first rain. He writes two or three +hours a day, and thinks that he gets on with his book better here +than at home. As for the rest of us, when we get fairly to rights we +shall have regular study hours and lose no time in preparing for the +examinations. + +I suppose you know that you have a full bedroom set in process of +construction. I say 'suppose you know,' because it is a profound +secret, and the girls could never have kept it to themselves as long +as this. + +The lounging-chair is my allotted portion, and although it is a +complicated bit of work, I accepted it gladly, feeling sure that you +would use it oftener than any of the other pieces of furniture. I +shall make it so deliciously easy that you will make me 'Knight of +the Chair,' and perhaps permit me to play a sort of devoted John +Brown to your Victoria. You will need one dull and prosy squire to +arrange your pillows, so that you can laugh at Jack's jokes without +weariness, and doze quietly while Geoff and Uncle Doc are talking +medicine. + +Of course the most exciting event of the week was the mysterious +disappearance and subsequent restoration of the Heir-Apparent; but I +feel sure somebody else will describe the event, because it is +uppermost in all our minds. + +Bell, for instance, would dress it up in fine style. She is no +historian, but in poetry and fiction none of us can touch her; +though, by the way, Polly's abilities in that direction are a good +deal underrated. It's as good as a play to get her after Jack when +he is in one of his teasing moods. They are like flint and steel, +and if Aunt Truth didn't separate them the sparks would fly. With a +girl like Polly, you have either to lie awake nights, thinking how +you'll get the better of her, or else put on a demeanour of +gentleness and patience, which serves as a sort of lightning-rod +round which the fire of her fun will play all day and never strike. +Polly is a good deal of a girl. She seems at first to have a pretty +sharp tongue, but I tell you she has a heart in which there is +swimming-room for everybody. This may not be 'information' to you, +whom we look upon as our clairvoyant, but it would be news to most +people. + +Uncle Doc, Bell, Geoff, Polly, Meg, and I started for the top of Pico +Negro the other morning. Bell rode Villikins, and Polly took a mule, +because she thought the animal would be especially sure-footed. He +was; in fact, he was so sure-footed that he didn't care to move at +all, and we had to take turns in beating him up to the top. We boys +walked for exercise, which we got to our hearts' content. + +It is only five or six miles from the old Mountain Mill (a picture of +which Jack will send you), and the ascent is pretty stiff climbing, +though nothing terrific. We lost the trail once, and floundered +about in the chaparral for half an hour, till Bell began to make a +poem on the occasion, when we became desperate, and dashed through a +thicket of brush, tearing ourselves to bits, but stumbling on the +trail at last. The view from the top is simply superb. The valleys +below are all yellow with grain-fields and green with vineyards, with +here and there the roofs of a straggling little settlement. The +depression in the side of the mountain (you will observe it in the +picture) Polly says has evidently been 'bitten out' by a prehistoric +animal, and it turns out to be the loveliest little canyon +imaginable. + +We have had one novel experience--that of seeing a tarantula fight; +and not between two, but five, tarantulas. We were about twenty +miles from camp, loping along a stretch of hot, dusty road. Jack got +off to cinch his saddle, and so we all stopped a moment to let our +horses breathe. As I was looking about, at nothing in particular, I +noticed a black ball in the deep dust at the side of the road. It +suddenly rolled over on itself and I called to the boys to watch the +fun. We got off, hitched our horses, and approached cautiously, for +I had seen a battle of the same kind before. There they were--five +huge, hairy, dirty, black creatures, as large as the palm of Dicky's +hand, all locked in deadly combat. They writhed and struggled and +embraced, their long, curling legs fastening on each other with a +sound that was actually like the cracking of bones. It takes a +little courage to stand and watch such a proceeding, for you feel as +if the hideous fellows might turn and jump for you; but they were +doubtless absorbed in their own battle, and we wanted to see the +affair to the end, so we took the risk, if there was any. At last +they showed signs of weariness, but we prodded them up with our +riding-whips, preferring that they should kill each other, rather +than do the thing ourselves. Finally, four of them lay in the dust, +doubled up and harmless, slain, I suppose, by their own poison. One, +the conquering hero, remained, and we dexterously scooped him into a +tomato-can that Jack had tied to his saddle for a drinking-cup, +covered him up with a handkerchief, and drew lots as to who should +carry him home to Dr. Paul. + +Knowing that the little beasts were gregarious, we hunted about for a +nest, which we might send to you after ousting its disagreeable +occupant. After much searching, we found a group of them--quite a +tarantula village, in fact. Their wonderful little houses are closed +on the outside by a circular, many-webbed mesh, two or three inches +across, and this web betrays the spider's den to the person who knows +the tricks of the trade. Directly underneath it you come upon the +tiny circular trap-door, which you will notice in the nest we send +with these letters. You will see how wonderfully it is made, with +its silken weaving inside, and its bits of bark and leaves outside; +and I know you will admire the hinge, which the tarantula must have +invented, and which is as pretty a bit of workmanship as the most +accomplished mechanic could turn out. We tore away the web and the +door from one of the nests, and then poured water down the hole. The +spider was at home, came out as fact as his clumsy legs would carry +him, and clutched the end of the stick Jack held out to him. Then we +tumbled him into the tomato-can just as he appeared to be making for +us. The two didn't agree at all. One of them despatched the other +on the way home--the same hero who had killed the other four; but, on +hearing his bloody record, Aunt Truth refused to have him about the +camp; so we gave him an alcohol bath, and you shall see his lordship +when you come. As Dr. Paul says, they have been known to clear +fourteen feet at a jump, perhaps you will feel happier to know that +he is in alcohol, though their bite is not necessarily fatal if it is +rightly cared for. + +The girls have been patronising the landscape by naming every peak, +valley, grove, and stream in the vicinity; and as there is nobody to +object, the names may hold. + +We carry about with us a collection of strong, flat stakes, which +have various names painted on them in neat black letters. Jack likes +that kind of work, and spends most of his time at it; for now that +Dr. Paul has bought a hundred acres up here, we are all greatly +interested in its improvement. + +Geoff has named the mountain Pico Negro, as I told you, and the +little canyon on its side is called the Giant's Yawn. Then we have - + +Mirror Pool, +The Lone Stump, +Field of the Cloth-of-Gold, +Cosy Nook, +The Imp's Wash-Bowl, +Dunce-Cap Hill, +The Saint's Rest, and +Il Penseroso Fall (in honour of Dicky, who was nearly drowned there). + +If anybody fails to call these localities by their proper names he +has to pay a fine of five cents, which goes towards beautifying the +place. Dr. Paul has had to pay two fines for Bell, three for Aunt +Truth, and seven for Dicky; so he considers it an ill-judged +arrangement. + +Our encampment is supposed to be in the Forest of Arden, and Jack has +begun nailing verses of poetry on the trees, like a second Orlando, +save that they are not love-poems at all, but appropriate quotations +from Wordsworth or Bryant. And this brings me to our thrilling +rendition of the play 'As You Like It,' last evening; but it is +deserving of more than the passing notice which I can give it here. + +One thing, however, I must tell you, as the girls will not write it +of themselves--that, although Bell carried off first honours and +fairly captivated the actors as well as the audience, all three of +them looked bewitching and acted with the greatest spirit, much +better than we fellows did. + +Of course we didn't give the entire play, and we had to 'double up' +on some of the characters in the most ridiculous fashion; but the +Burtons helped out wonderfully, Scott playing Oliver, and Laura doing +Audrey. They were so delighted with the camp that Aunt Truth has +invited them to come again on Saturday and stay a week. + +At the risk of being called conceited I will also state that we boys +consider that the stage management was a triumph of inventive art; we +worked like beavers for two days, and the results were marvellous, +'if I do say so as shouldn't.' + +Just consider we were 'six miles from a lemon,' as Sydney Smith would +say, and yet we transformed all out of doors, first into an elegant +interior, and then into a conventional stage forest. + +A great deal of work is available for other performances, and so we +do not regret it a bit; we propose doing 'As You Like It' again when +you are down here, and meanwhile we give diversified entertainments +which Jack calls variety shows, but which in reality are very chaste +and elegant occasions. + +The other night we had a minstrel show, wearing masks of black +cambric, with red mouths painted on them; you should have seen us, +all in a dusky semicircle, seated on boards supported by nail-kegs: +it was a scene better imagined than described. This is certainly the +ideal way to live in summer-time, and we should be perfectly happy +and content if you could only shake off your troublesome cough and +come to share our pleasure. We feel incomplete without you; and no +matter how large our party may grow as the summer progresses, there +will always be a vacant niche that none can fill save the dear little +Saint who is always enshrined therein by all her loyal worshippers, +and by none more reverently than her friend, + +PHILIP S. NOBLE. + + +III. THE KNIGHT OF THE SPECTACLES TAKES THE QUILL. + + +This paper is writ unto her most Royal Highness, our beloved Gold +Elsie, Queen of our thoughts and Empress of all hearts. + +You must know, most noble Lady, that one who is your next of kin and +high in the royal favour has laid upon us a most difficult and +embarrassing task. + +In our capacity as Director of the Court Games, we humbly suggested +the subjects for the weekly bulletin which your Highness commanded to +be written; but, alas, with indifferent success; for the Courtiers +growled and the Ladies-in-waiting howled at the topics given them for +consideration. + +On soliciting our own subjects from the Privy Councillor and Knight +of the Brush, Lord John Howard, he revengefully ordered me to 'edify' +your Majesty with wise utterances; as if such poor, rude words as +mine could please the ear that should only listen to the singing of +birds, the babbling of brooks, or the silvery tongue of genius! + +When may your devoted subjects hope to see their gracious Sovereign +again in their midst? + +The court is fast drifting into dangerous informalities of conduct. +The Princess Bell-Pepper partakes of the odoriferous onion at each +noon-day meal, so that a royal salute would be impossible; the hands +of the Countess Paulina look as if you might have chosen one of your +attendants from 'Afric's sunny fountains, or India's coral strand'; +and as for the Court Chaplain, Rev. Jack-in-the-Pulpit, he has +woefully forsaken the manners of the 'cloth,' and insists upon +retaining his ancient title of Knight of the Brush; the Duchess of +Sweet Marjoram alone continues circumspect in walk and mien, for +blood will tell, and she is more Noble than the others. + +In our capacity of Court Physician we have thrice relieved your +youthful page, Sir Dicky Winship, of indigestion, caused by too +generous indulgence in the flowing bowl--of milk and cherries; we +have also prescribed for his grace the Duke of Noble, whose ducal ear +was poisoned by the insidious oak leaf. + +Your private box awaits you in the Princess' Theatre, and your +Majesty's special interpreters of the drama will celebrate your +arrival as gorgeously as it deserves. + +The health of our dearly beloved Sovereign engages the constant +thought of all her loyal and adoring subjects; they hope ere long to +cull a wreath of laurel with their own hands and place it on a brow +which needs naught but its golden crown of hair to affirm its queenly +dignity. And as for crown jewels, has not our Empress of Hearts a +full store?--two dazzling sapphires, her eyes; a string of pearls, +her teeth; her lips two rubies; and when she opens them, diamonds of +wisdom issue therefrom! + +Come! and let the sight of thy royal charms gladden the eyes of thy +waiting people! Issued under the hand of + +SIR GEOFFREY STRONG, Bart., +Court Physician and Knight of the Spectacles. + + +IV. MARGERY'S CONTRIBUTION. + + +COSY NOOK, July 11, 188- . + +My own dear Elsie,--Your weekly chronicle is almost ready for +Monday's stage, and I am allowed to come in at the close with as many +pages of 'gossip' as I choose; which means that I may run on to my +heart's content and tell you all the little things that happen in the +chinks between the great ones, for Uncle Doc has refused to read this +part of the letter. + +First for some commissions: Aunt Truth asks if your mother will +kindly select goods and engage Mrs. Perkins to make us each a couple +of Scotch gingham dresses. She has our measures, and we wish them +simple, full-skirted gowns, like the last; everybody thinks them so +pretty and becoming. Bell's two must be buff and pink, Polly's grey +and green, and mine blue and brown. We find that we haven't clothes +enough for a three months' stay; and the out-of-door life is so hard +upon our 'forest suits' that we have asked Mrs. Perkins to send us +new ones as soon as possible. + +We have had a very busy and exciting week since Polly began this +letter, for there have been various interruptions and an unusual +number of visitors. + +First, there was our mountain climb to the top of Pico Negro; Phil +says he has written you about that, but I hardly believe he mentioned +that he and the other boys worried us sadly by hanging on to the +tails of our horses as they climbed up the steepest places. To be +sure they were so awfully tired that I couldn't help pitying them; +but Uncle Doc had tried to persuade them not to walk, so that it was +their own fault after all. You cannot imagine what a dreadful +feeling it gives one to be climbing a slippery, rocky path, and know +that a great heavy boy is pulling your horse backwards by the tail. +Polly insisted that she heard her mule's tail break loose from its +moorings, and on measuring it when she got back to camp she found it +three inches longer than usual. + +The mule acted like original sin all day, and Polly was so completely +worn-out that she went to bed at five o'clock; Jack was a good deal +the worse for wear too, so that they got on beautifully all day. It +is queer that they irritate each other so, for I am sure that there +is no lack of real friendship between them; but Jack is a confirmed +tease, and he seems to keep all his mischief bottled up for especial +use with Polly. I have tried to keep him out of trouble, as you +asked me; and although it gives me plenty to do, I am succeeding +tolerably well, except in his dealings with Polly. I lecture him +continually, but 'every time he opens his mouth he puts his foot in +it.' + +Polly was under a cloud the first of the week. Villikins was sick, +and Dr. Winship sent her to Aunt Truth for a bottle of sweet oil. +Aunt Truth was not in sight, so Polly went to the box of stores and +emptied a whole quart bottle of salad oil into a pail, and Villikins +had to take it, WHEEL OR WHOA (Jack's joke!). Auntie went to make +the salad dressing at dinner-time, and discovered her loss and +Polly's mistake. It was the last bottle; and as we can't get any +more for a week, the situation was serious, and she was very much +tried. Poor Polly had a good cry over her carelessness, and came to +the dinner-table in a very sensitive frame of mind. Then what should +Jack do but tell Dicky to take Villikins a head of lettuce for his +supper, and ask Polly why she didn't change his name from Villikins +to Salad-in! Polly burst into tears, and left the table, while Dr. +Paul gave Jack a scolding, which I really think he deserved, though +it was a good joke. The next morning, the young gentleman put on a +pair of old white cotton gloves and his best hat, gathered her a +bouquet of wild flowers, and made her a handsome apology before the +whole party; so she forgave him, and they are friends--until the next +quarrel. + +On the night before the play, Laura and Scott Burton arrived on +horseback, and the next morning the rest of the family appeared on +the scene. We had sent over to see if Laura would play Audrey on so +short notice, and bring over some odds and ends for costumes. We +actually had an audience of sixteen persons, and we had no idea of +playing before anybody but Aunt Truth and Dicky. + +There were three of the Burtons, Pancho, Hop Yet, the people from the +dairy farm, and a university professor from Berkeley, with eight +students. They were on a walking tour, and were just camping for the +night when Scott and Jack met them, and invited them over to the +performance. Geoffrey and Phil were acquainted with three of them, +and Uncle Paul knew the professor. + +Laura, Anne, and Scott went home the next morning, but came back in +two days for their week's visit. The boys like Scott very much; he +falls right into the camp ways, and doesn't disturb the even current +of our life; and Anne, who is a sweet little girl of twelve, has +quite taken Dicky under her wing, much to our relief. + +With Laura's advent, however, a change came over the spirit of our +dreams, and, to tell the truth, we are not over and above pleased +with it. By the way, she spent last summer at the hotel, and you +must have seen her, did you not? Anyway, Mrs. Burton and Aunt Truth +were old school friends, and Bell has known Laura for two years, but +they will never follow in their mothers' footsteps. Laura is so +different from her mother that I should never think they were +relations; and she has managed to change all our arrangements in some +mysterious way which we can't understand. I get on very well with +her; she positively showers favours upon me, and I more than half +suspect it is because she thinks I don't amount to much. As for the +others, she rubs Polly the wrong way, and I believe she is a little +bit jealous of Bell. + +You see, she is several months older than the rest of us, and has +spent two winters in San Francisco, where she went out a great deal +to parties and theatres, so that her ideas are entirely different +from ours. + +She wants every single bit of attention--one boy to help her over the +brooks, one to cut walking-sticks for her, another to peel her +oranges, and another to read Spanish with her, and so on. Now, you +know very well that she will never get all this so long as Bell +Winship is in camp, for the boys think that Bell drags up the sun +when she's ready for him in the morning, and pushes him down at night +when she happens to feel sleepy. + +We, who have known Bell always, cannot realise that any one can help +loving her, but there is something in Laura which makes it impossible +for her to see the right side of people. She told me this morning +that she thought Bell had grown so vain and airy and self-conscious +that it was painful to see her. I could not help being hurt; for you +know what Bell is--brimful of nonsense and sparkle and bright +speeches, but just as open as the day and as warm as the sunshine. +If she could have been spoiled, we should have turned her head long +ago; but she hasn't a bit of silly vanity, and I never met any one +before who didn't see the pretty charm of her brightness and +goodness--did you? + +And yet, somehow, Laura sticks needles into her every time she +speaks. She feels them, too, but it only makes her quiet, for she is +too proud and sensitive to resent it. I can see that she is +different in her ways, as if she felt she was being criticised. +Polly is quite the reverse. If anybody hurts her feelings she makes +creation scream, and I admire her courage. + +Aunt Truth doesn't know anything about all this, for Laura is a +different girl when she is with her or Dr. Paul; not that she is +deceitful, but that she is honestly anxious for their good opinion. +You remember Aunt Truth's hobby that we should never defend ourselves +by attacking any one else, and none of us would ever complain, if we +were hung, drawn, and quartered. + +Laura was miffed at having to play Audrey, but we didn't know that +she could come until the last moment, and we were going to leave that +part out. + +'I don't believe you appreciate my generosity in taking this +thankless part,' she said to Bell, when we were rehearsing. 'Nobody +would ever catch you playing second fiddle, my dear. All leading +parts reserved for Miss Winship, by order of the authors, I suppose.' + +'Indeed, Laura,' Bell said, 'if we had known you were coming we would +have offered you the best part, but I only took Rosalind because I +knew the lines, and the girls insisted.' + +'You've trained the girls well--hasn't she, Geoffrey?' asked Laura, +with a queer kind of laugh. + +But I will leave the unpleasant subject. I should not have spoken of +it at all except that she has made me so uncomfortable to-day that it +is fresh in my mind. Bell and Polly and I have talked the matter all +over, and are going to try and make her like us, whether she wants to +or not. We have agreed to be just as polite and generous as we +possibly can, and see if she won't 'come round,' for she is perfectly +delighted with the camp, and wants to stay a month. + +Polly says she is going to sing 'Home Sweet Home' to her every night, +and drop double doses of the homoeopathic cure for home-sickness into +her tea, with a view of creating the disease. + +Good-bye, and a hundred kisses from your loving + +MARGERY DAW. + + +V. THE CAMP POETESS ADDS HER STORE OF MENTAL RICHES TO THE GENERAL +FUND. + + +My darling,--I have a thousand things to tell you, but I cannot +possibly say them in rhyme, merely because the committee insists upon +it. I send you herewith all the poetry which has been written in +camp since last Monday, and it has been a very prosy week. + +I have given them to papa, and he says that the best of my own, which +are all bad enough, is the following hammock-song. + +I thought it out while I was swinging Margery, and here it is! - + + +To--fro, +Dreamily, slow, +Under the trees; +Swing--swing, +Drowsily sing +The birds and the bees; +Sleep--rest, +Slumber is best, +Wakefulness sad; +Rest--sleep, +Forget how to weep, +Dream and be glad! + + +Papa says it is all nonsense to say that slumber is best and +wakefulness sad; and that it is possible to tell the truth in poetry. +Perhaps it is, but why don't they do it oftener, then? And how was +he to know that Polly and Jack had just gone through a terrible +battle of words in which I was peacemaker, and that Dicky had been as +naughty as--Nero--all day? These two circumstances made me look at +the world through blue glasses, and that is always the time one longs +to write poetry. + +I send you also Geoff's verses, written to mamma, and slipped into +the box when we were playing Machine Poetry:- + + +I know a woman fair and calm, + Whose shining tender eyes +Make, when I meet their earnest gaze, + Sweet thoughts within me rise. + +And if all silver were her hair, + Or faded were her face, +She would not look to me less fair, + Nor lack a single grace. + +And if I were a little child, + With childhood's timid trust, +I think my heart would fly to her, + And love--because it must! + +And if I were an earnest man, + With empty heart and life, +I think--(but I might change my mind) - + She'd be my chosen wife! + + +Isn't that pretty? Oh, Elsie! I hope I shall grow old as +beautifully as mamma does, so that people can write poetry to me if +they feel like it! Here is Jack's, for Polly's birthday; he says he +got the idea from a real poem which is just as silly as his:- + + +A pollywog from a wayside brook + Is a goodly gift for thee; +But a milk-white steed, or a venison sheep, + Will do very well for me. + +For you a quivering asphodel + (Two ducks and a good fat hen), +For me a withering hollyhock + (For seven and three are ten!). + +Rose-red locks and a pug for thee + (The falling dew is chill), +A dove, a rope, and a rose for me + (Oh, passionate, pale-blue pill!). + +For you a greenery, yallery gown + (Hath one tomb room for four?), +Dig me a narrow gravelet here + (Oh, red is the stain of gore!!). + + +I told Jack I thought it extremely unhitched, but he says that's the +chief beauty of the imitation. + +I give you also some verses intended for Polly's birthday, which we +shall celebrate, when the day arrives, by a grand dinner. + +You remember how we tease her about her love for tea, which she +cannot conceal, but which she is ashamed of all the same. + +Well! I have printed the poem on a card, and on the other side +Margery has drawn the picture of a cross old maid, surrounded by +seven cats, all frying to get a drink out of her tea-cup. Then Geoff +is going to get a live cat from the milk ranch near here, and box it +up for me to give to her when she receives her presents at the +dinner-table. Won't it be fun? + + +OWED TO POLLY +BECAUSE OF HER BIRTHDAY. + + +She camps among the untrodden ways + Forninst the 'Mountain Mill'; +A maid whom there are few to praise + And few to wish her ill. + +She lives unknown, and few could know + What Pauline is to me; +As dear a joy as are to her + Her frequent cups of tea. + +A birthday this dear creature had, + Full many a year ago; +She says she is but just fifteen, + Of course she ought to know. + +But still this gift I bring to her, + Appropriate to her age, +Regardless of her stifled scorn, + Or well conceal-ed rage! + +She smiles upon these tender lines, + As you all plainly see, +But when she meets me all alone, + How different it will be! + + +Now comes Geoff's, to be given with a pretty little inkstand:- + + +There was a young maiden whose thought +Was so airy it couldn't be caught; + So what do you think? + We gave her some ink, +And captured her light-winged thought. + + +Here is Jack's last on Polly:- + + +There's a pert little poppet called Polly, +Who frequently falls into folly! + She's a terrible tongue + For a 'creetur' so young, +But if she were dumb she'd be jolly! + + +I helped Polly with a reply, and we delivered it five minutes later:- + + +I'd rather be deaf, Master Jack, +For if only one sense I must lack, + To be rid of your voice + I should always rejoice, +Nor mourn if it never came back! + + +And now good-night and good-bye until I am allowed to write you my +own particular kind of letter. + +The girls and boys are singing round the camp-fire, and I must go out +and join them in one song before we go to bed. + +Yours with love, now and always, +BELL. + +P. S--Our 'Happy Hexagon' has become a sort of 'Obstreperous +Octagon.' Laura and Scott Burton are staying with us. Scott is a +good deal of a bookworm, and uses very long words; his favourite name +for me at present is Calliope; I thought it was a sort of steam- +whistle, but Margery thinks it was some one who was connected with +poetry. We don't dare ask the boys; will you find out? + + +VI. + +CAMP CHAPARRAL, July 13, 188-. +STUDIO RAPHAEL. + +Dear Little Sis,--The enclosed sketches speak for themselves, or at +least I hope they do. Keep them in your private portfolio, and when +I am famous you can produce them to show the public at what an early +age my genius began to sprout. + +At first I thought I'd make them real 'William Henry' pictures, but +concluded to give you a variety. + +Can't stop to write another line; and if you missed your regular +letter this week you must not growl, for the sketches took an awful +lot of time, and I'm just rushed to death here anyway. + +Love to mother and father. +Your loving brother. JACK + +P.S.--Polly says you need not expect to recognise that deer by his +portrait, should you ever meet him, as no one could expect to get a +STRIKING likeness at a distance of a half-mile. But, honestly, we +have been closer than that to several deer. + + + +CHAPTER V: THE FOREST OF ARDEN--GOOD NEWS + + + +'From the East to western Ind, +No jewel is like Rosalind; +Her worth, being mounted on the wind, +Through all the world bears Rosalind; +All the pictures, fairest lined, +Are but black to Rosalind; +Let no face be kept in mind, +But the fair of Rosalind.' + + +The grand performance of 'As You Like It' must have a more extended +notice than it has yet received, inasmuch as its double was never +seen on any stage. + +The reason of this somewhat ambitious selection lay in the fact that +our young people had studied it in Dr. Winship's Shakespeare class +the preceding winter, but they were actually dumb with astonishment +when Bell proposed it for the opening performance in the new theatre. + +'I tell you,' she argued, 'there are not many pieces which would be +effective when played out of doors by dim candle-light, but this will +be just as romantic and lovely as can be. You see it can be played +just "as you like it."' + +Philip and Aunt Truth wanted a matinee performance, but the girls +resisted this plan very strongly, feeling that the garish light of +day would be bad for the makeshift costumes, and would be likely to +rob them of what little courage they possessed. + +'We give the decoration of the theatre entirely into your hands, +boys,' Polly had said on the day before the performance. 'You have +some of the hardest work done already, and can just devote yourselves +to the ornamental part; but don't expect any more ideas from us, for +you will certainly be disappointed.' + +'I should think not, indeed!' cried Bell, energetically. 'Here we +have the wall decorations for the first scene, and all the costumes +besides; and the trouble is, that three or four of them will have to +be made to-morrow, after Laura comes with the trappings of war. I +hope she will get here for dinner to-night; then we can decide on our +finery, and have a rough rehearsal.' + +'Well, girls!' shouted Jack, from the theatre, 'come and have one +consultation, and then we'll let you off. Phil wants to change the +location altogether.' + +'Oh, nonsense!' cried Madge, as the three girls ran towards the scene +of action. 'It's the only suitable place within a mile of the camp.' + +'I think it will be simply perfect, when you have done a little more +cutting,' said Bell. 'Just see our advantages: First, we have that +rising knoll opposite the stage, which is exactly the thing for +audience seats; then we have a semicircular background of trees and a +flat place for the stage, which is perfectly invaluable; last of all, +just gaze upon that madrono-tree in the centre, and the oak on the +left; why, they are worth a thousand dollars for scenery.' + +'Especially in the first scene--ducal interior, or whatever it is,' +said Phil, disconsolately. + +'Jingo! that is a little embarrassing,' groaned Jack. + +'Not at all,' said Polly, briskly. 'There is plenty of room to set +the interior in front of those trees. It can be all fixed +beforehand, and just whisked away for good at the end of the first +act.' + +'That's true,' said Geoff, thoughtfully. 'But we can't have any +Adam's cottage. We talked it over last night, and decided it +"couldn't be did."' + +'Did you indeed!' exclaimed Bell, sarcastically. 'Then allow me to +remark that you three boys represent a very obtuse triangle.' + +'Thanks, most acid Rosalind!' murmured Geoff, meekly. 'Could you +deign, as spokesman of the very acute triangle, to suggest +something?' + +'Certainly. There is the rear of the brush kitchen in plain sight, +to convey the idea of a rustic hut. To be sure, it's a good distance +to the left, but let the audience screw round in their seats when +they hear the voices, and Adam, Oliver, and Orlando can walk out +carelessly, and go through their scene right there.' + +'Admirable!' quoth Geoff. 'We bow to your superior judgment.' + +'What an inspiration that was to bring those Chinese lanterns for the +Fourth of July; they have just saved us from utter ruin,' said +Margery, who was quietly making leaf-trimming. + +'Yes, the effect is going to be perfectly gorgeous!' exclaimed Polly, +clasping her hands in anticipation. 'How many have we? Ten? Oh, +that's splendid; and how many candles?' + +'As many as we care to use,' Phil answered, from the top of the +ladder where he was at work. 'And look at my arrangement for holding +them to these trees. Aren't they immense?' + +'By the way,' said Bell, 'don't forget the mossy banks under those +trees, for stage seats; and make me some kind of a thing on the left +side, to swoon on when I sniff Orlando's gory handkerchief.' + +'A couple of rocks,' suggested Jack. + +'Not exactly,' replied the critical Rosalind, with great dignity. 'I +am black and blue already from practising my faint, and I expect to +shriek with pain when I fall to-morrow night.' + +'St. Jacob's Oil relieves stiffened joints, smooths the wrinkles from +the brow of care, soothes lacerated feelings, and 'ushes the 'owl of +hinfancy,' remarked Geoffrey serenely, as he prepared to build the +required mossy banks. + +'My dear cousin (there are times when I am glad it is only second +cousin), have you a secret contract to advertise a vulgar patent +medicine? or why this eloquence?' laughed Bell. + +'And, Jack,' suggested Polly, 'you don't seem to be doing anything; +fix a stump for me to sit on while Orlando and Rosalind are making +love.' + +'All right, countess. I'd like to see you stumped once in my life. +Shall we have the canvases brought for stage carpets?' + +'We say no,' cried Rosalind, firmly. 'We shall be a thousand times +more awkward stumbling over stiff billows of carpet. Let's sweep the +ground as clean and smooth as possible, and let it go for all the +scenes.' + +'Yes, we shall then be well GROUNDED in our parts,' remarked Phil, +hiding his head behind a bunch of candles. + +'Take care, young man,' laughed Polly, 'or you may be "run to earth" +instead.' + +'Or be requested by the audience to get up and dust,' cried the +irrepressible Jack, whose wit was very apt to be of a slangy +character. 'Now let us settle the interior, or I shall go mad.' + +'Bell and I have it all settled,' said Geoffrey, promptly. 'The +background is to be made of three sheets hung over a line, and the +two sides will be formed of canvas carpets; the walls will have +Japanese fans, parasols, and--' + +'Jupiter!' exclaimed Jack, who, as knight of the brush, felt +compelled to be artistic. 'Imagine a ducal palace, in the year so +many hundred and something, decorated with Japanese bric-a-brac! I +blush for you.' + +'Now, Jack, we might as well drop the whole play as begin to think of +the 'nakkeronisms,' or whatever the word is. I have got to wear an +old white wrapper to the wrestling-match, but I don't complain,' said +Polly. + +Just here Bell ran back from the kitchen, exclaiming: + +'I have secured Pancho for Charles the Wrestler. Oh, he was +fearfully obstinate! but when I told him he would only be on the +stage two minutes, and would not have to speak a word, but just let +Geoff throw him, he consented. Isn't that good? Did you decide +about the decorations?' + +'It will have to be just as we suggested,' answered Margery. 'Fans, +parasols, flowers, and leaves, with the madrono-wood furniture +scattered about, sheep-skins, etc.' + +'A few venison rugs, I presume you mean,' said Geoffrey, slyly. +'Say, Polly, omit the cold cream for once, will you? You don't want +to outshine everybody.' + +'Thank you,' she replied. 'I will endeavour to take care of my own +complexion, if you will allow me. As for yours, you look more like +Othello than Orlando.' + +'Come, come, girls,' said industrious Margery, 'let us go to the tent +and sew. It is nothing but nonsense here, and we are not +accomplishing anything.' + +So they wisely left the boys to themselves for the entire day, and +transformed their tent into a mammoth dressmaking establishment, with +clever Aunt Truth as chief designer. + + +The intervening hours had slipped quickly away, and now the fatal +moment had arrived, and everything was ready for the play. + +The would-be actresses were a trifle excited when the Professor and +his eight students were brought up and introduced by Jack and Scott +Burton; and, as if that were not enough, who should drive up at the +last moment but the family from the neighbouring milk ranch, and beg +to be allowed the pleasure of witnessing the performance. Mr. +Sandford was the gentleman who had sold Dr. Winship his land, and so +they were cordially invited to remain. + +All the cushions and shawls belonging to the camp were arranged +carefully on the knoll, for audience seats; it was a brilliant +moonlight night, and the stage assumed a very festive appearance with +its four pounds of candles and twelve Chinese lanterns. + +Meanwhile the actors were dressing in their respective tents. Bell's +first dress was a long pink muslin wrapper of Mrs. Burton's, which +had been belted in and artistically pasted over with bouquets from +the cretonne trunk covers, in imitation of flowered satin; under this +she wore a short blue lawn skirt of her own, catching up the pink +muslin on the left side with a bouquet of wild roses, and producing +what she called a 'positively Neilson effect.' + +Her bright hair was tossed up into a fluffy knot on the top of her +head; and with a flat coronet of wild roses and another great bunch +at her belt, one might have gone far and not have found a prettier +Rosalind. + +'I declare, you are just too lovely--isn't she, Laura?' asked +Margery. + +'Yes, she looks quite well,' answered Laura, abstractedly, being much +occupied in making herself absurdly beautiful as Audrey. 'Of course +the dress fits horridly, but perhaps it won't show in the dim light.' + +'Oh, is it very bad?' sighed Bell, plaintively; 'I can't see it in +this glass. Well, the next one fits better, and I have to wear that +the longest. Shall I do your hair, Laura?' + +'No--thanks; Margery has such a capital knack at hair-dressing, and +she doesn't come on yet.' + +During this conversation Polly was struggling with Aunt Truth's +trained white wrapper. It was rather difficult to make it look like +a court dress; but she looked as fresh and radiant as a rose in it, +for the candle-light obliterated every freckle, and one could see +nothing but a pair of dancing eyes, the pinkest of cheeks, and a head +running over with curls of ruddy gold. + +'Now, Bell, criticise me!' she cried, taking a position in the middle +of the tent, and turning round like a wax figure. 'I have torn out +my hair by the roots to give it a "done up" look, and have I +succeeded? and shall I wear any flowers with this lace surplice? and +what on earth shall I do with my hands? they're so black they will +cast a gloom over the stage. Perhaps I can wrap my handkerchief +carelessly round one, and I'll keep the other round your waist, +considerable, tucked under your Watteau pleat. Will I do?' + +'Do? I should think so!' and Bell eyed her with manifest approval. +'Your hair is very nice, and your neck looks lovely with that lace +handkerchief. As for flowers, why don't you wear a great mass of +yellow and white daisies? You'll be as gorgeous as--' + +'As a sunset by Turner,' said Laura, with a glance at Polly's auburn +locks. 'Seems to me this is a mutual admiration society, isn't it?' +and she sank languidly into a chair to have her hair dressed. + +'Yes, it is,' cried Polly, boldly; 'and it's going to "continner." +Meg, you're a darling in that blue print and pretty hat. I'll fill +my fern-basket with flowers, and you can take it, as to have +something in your hand to play with. You look nicer than any Phoebe +I ever saw, that's a fact. And now, hurrah! we're all ready, and +there's the boys' bell, so let us assemble out in the kitchen. Oh +dear! I believe I'm frightened, in spite of every promise to the +contrary.' + +When the young people saw each other for the first time in their +stage costumes there was a good deal of merriment and some honest +admiration. Geoff looked very odd without his eyeglasses and with +the yellow wig that was the one property belonging to this star +dramatic organisation. + +The girls had not succeeded in producing a great effect with the +masculine costumes, because of insufficient material. But the boys +had determined not to wear their ordinary clothes, no matter what +happened; so Jack had donned one of Hop Yet's blue blouses for his +Sylvius dress, and had ready a plaid shawl to throw gracefully over +one shoulder whenever he changed to the Banished Duke. + +His Sylvius attire was open to criticism, but no one could fail to +admire his appearance as the Duke, on account of a magnificent ducal +head-gear, from which soared a bunch of tall peacock feathers. + +'Oh, Jack, what a head-dress for a Duke!' laughed Margery; 'no wonder +they banished you. Did you offend the court hatter?' + +Phil said that at all events nobody could mistake him for anything +but a fool, in his 'Touchstone' costume, and so he was jest-er going +to be contented. + +Scott Burton was arranging Pancho's toilette for the wrestling-match, +and meanwhile trying to raise his drooping spirits; and Rosalind was +vainly endeavouring to make Adam's beard of grey moss stay on. + +While these antics were going on behind the scenes, the audience was +seated on the knoll, making merry over the written programmes, which +had been a surprise of Geoff's, and read as follows:- + + +THE PRINCESS' THEATRE. +July 10th, 188-. + +APPEARANCE THE GREATEST DRAMATIC COMPANY ON EARTH (FACT). +THE COOLEST THEATRE IN THE WORLD. + +A Royal Galaxy and Boyaxy of Artists in the play of +AS YOU LIKE IT, +By William Shakespeare, or Lord Bacon. + +CAST. + +'Alas! unmindful of their doom, the little victims play; +No sense have they of ills to come, or cares beyond to-day.' + +ROSALIND The Lady Bell-Pepper. + (Her greatest creation.) +CELIA The Countess Paulina. +PHOEBE The Duchess of Sweet Marjoram. +AUDREY A talented Incognita of the Court. +ORLANDO Hennery Irving Salvini Strong. + (Late from the Blank Theatre, Oil City.) +ADAM Dr. Paul Winship. + (By kind permission of his manager, + Mrs. T. W.) +BANISHED DUKE } +SYLVIUS } Lord John Howard } Lightning +TOUCHSTONE } } Change Artists. +JACQUE } Duke of Noble } + (N.B.--The Duke of Noble has played + the 'fool' five million times.) +OLIVER Mr. Scott Burton. + (Specially engaged.) +CHARLES THE WRESTLER Pancho Muldoon Sullivan. + (His first appearance.) + +The Comb Orchestra will play the Music of the Future. + +The Usher will pass pop-corn between the Acts. Beds may be ordered +at 10.30. + + +The scene between Adam and Orlando went off with good effect; and +when Celia and Rosalind came through the trees in an affectionate +attitude, and Celia's blithe voice broke the stillness with, 'I pray +thee, Rosalind, sweet my coz, be merry,' there was a hearty burst of +applause which almost frightened them into silence. + +At the end of the first act everybody was delighted; the stage- +manager, carpenter, scene-shifter, costumier, and all the stars were +called successively before the curtain. + +Hop Yet declared it was 'all the same good as China theatre'; and +every one agreed to that criticism without a dissenting voice. + +To be sure, there was an utter absence of stage-management, and all +the 'traditions' were remarkable for their absence; but I fancy that +the spirits of Siddons and Kemble, Macready and Garrick, looked down +with kind approval upon these earnest young actors as they recited +the matchless old words, moving to and fro in the quaint setting of +trees and moonlight, with an orchestra of cooing doves and murmuring +zephyrs. + +The forest scenes were intended to be the features of the evening, +and in these the young people fairly surpassed themselves. Any one +who had seen Neilson in her doublet and hose of silver-grey, Modjeska +in her shades of blue, and Ada Cavendish in her lovely suit of green, +might have thought Bell's patched-up dress a sorry mixture; yet these +three brilliant stars in the theatrical firmament might have envied +this little Rosalind the dewy youth and freshness that so triumphed +over all deficiencies of costume. + +Margery's camping-dress of grey, shortened to the knee, served for +its basis. Round the skirt and belt and sleeves were broad bands of +laurel-leaf trimming. She wore a pair of Margery's long grey +stockings and Laura's dainty bronze Newport ties. A soft grey chudda +shawl of Aunt Truth's was folded into a mantle to swing from the +shoulder, its fringes being caught up out of sight, and a laurel-leaf +trimming added. On her bright wavy hair was perched a cunning flat +cap of leaves, and, as she entered with Polly, leaning on her +manzanita staff, and sighing, 'Oh Jupiter, how weary are my spirits!' +one could not wish a lovelier stage picture. + +And so the play went on, with varying fortunes. Margery was +frightened to death, and persisted in taking Touchstone's speeches +right out of his mouth, much to his discomfiture. Adam's beard +refused to stay on; so did the moustache of the Banished Duke, and +the clothes of Sylvius. But nothing could damp the dramatic fire of +the players, nor destroy the enthusiasm of the sympathetic audience. + +Dicky sat in the dress-circle, wrapped in blankets, and laughed +himself nearly into convulsions over Touchstone's jokes, and the +stage business of the Banished Duke; for it is unnecessary to state +that Jack was not strictly Shakespearean in his treatment of the +part. + +As for Polly, she enjoyed being Celia with all her might, and +declared her intention of going immediately on the 'regular' stage; +but Jack somewhat destroyed her hopes by affirming that her nose and +hair wouldn't be just the thing on the metropolitan boards, although +they might pass muster in a backwoods theatre. + + +'Hello! What's this?' exclaimed Philip, one morning. 'A visitor? +Yes--no! Why, it's Senor Don Manuel Felipe Hilario Noriega coming up +the canyon! He's got a loaded team, too! I wonder if Uncle Doc is +expecting anything.' + +The swarthy gentleman with the long name emerged from one cloud of +dust and disappeared in another, until he neared the gate where +Philip and Polly were standing. + +Philip opened the gate, and received a bow of thanks which would have +made Manuel's reputation at a Spanish court. + +'Going up to camp?' + +'Si, senor.' + +'Those things for us?' + +'Si, senor.' + +'What are they?' + +'Si, senor.' + +'Exactly! Well, are there any letters?' + +'Si, senor.' Whereupon he drew one from his gorgeously-decorated +leather belt. + +Philip reached for it, and Polly leaned over his shoulder, devoured +with curiosity. + +'It's for Aunt Truth,' she said; 'and--yes, I am sure it is Mrs. +Howard's writing; and if it is--' + +Hereupon, as Manuel spoke no English, and neither Philip nor Polly +could make inquiries in Spanish, Polly darted to the cart in her +usual meteoric style, put one foot on the hub of a wheel and climbed +to the top like a squirrel, snatched off a corner of the canvas +cover, and cried triumphantly, 'I knew it! Elsie is coming! Here's +a tent, and some mattresses and pillows. Hurry! Help me down, +quick! Oh, slow-coach! Keep out of the way and I'll jump! Give me +the letter. I can run faster than you can.' And before the vestige +of an idea had penetrated Philip's head, nothing could be seen of +Polly but a pair of twinkling heels and the gleam of a curly head +that caught every ray of the sun and turned it into ruddier gold. + +It was a dusty, rocky path, and up-hill at that; but Polly, who was +nothing if not ardent, never slackened her pace, but dashed along +until she came in sight of the camp, where she expended her last +breath in one shrill shriek for Aunt Truth. + +It was responded to promptly. Indeed, it was the sort of shriek that +always commands instantaneous attention; and Aunt Truth came out of +her tent prepared to receive tragic news. Bell followed; and the +entire family would have done the same had they been in camp. + +Polly thrust the letter into Mrs. Winship's hand, and sank down +exhausted, exclaiming, breathlessly, 'There's a mattress--and a tent- +-coming up the canyon. It's Elsie's, I know. Philip is down at the +gate--with the cart--but I came ahead. Phew! but it's warm!' + +'What!' cried Bell, joyfully. 'Elsie at the gate! It can't be +true!' And she darted like an arrow through the trees. + +'Come back! come back!' screamed Polly. + +'Elsie is not at the gate. Don S. D. M. F. H. N. is there with a +team loaded down with things. Isn't it from Mrs. Howard, Aunt +Truth?' + +'Yes, it is. Written this morning from Tacitas Rancho. Why, how is +this? Let me see!' + + +TACITAS RANCHO, Monday morning. + +Dear Truth,--You will be surprised to receive a letter from me, +written from Tacitas. But here we are, Elsie and I; and, what is +better, we are on our way to you. + +('I knew it!' exclaimed the girls.) + +Elsie has been growing steadily better for three weeks. The fever +seems to have disappeared entirely, and the troublesome cough is so +much lessened that she sleeps all night without waking. The doctor +says that the camp-life will be the very best thing for her now, and +will probably complete her recovery. + +('Oh, joy, joy!' cried the girls.) + +I need not say how gladly we followed this special prescription of +our kind doctor's, nor add that we started at once. + +('Oh, Aunt Truth, there is nobody within a mile of the camp; can't I, +PLEASE can't I turn one little hand-spring, just one little lady-like +one?' pleaded Polly, dancing on one foot and chewing her sun-bonnet +string. + +'No, dear, you can't! Keep quiet and let me read.') + +Elsie would not let me tell you our plans any sooner, lest the old +story of a sudden ill turn would keep us at home; and I think very +likely that she longed to give the dear boys and girls a surprise. + +We arrived at the Burtons' yesterday. Elsie bore the journey +exceedingly well, but I would not take any risks, and so we shall not +drive over until day after to-morrow morning. + +('You needn't have hurried quite so fast, Polly dear.') + +I venture to send the tent and its belongings ahead to-day, so that +Jack may get everything to rights before we arrive. + +The mattress is just the size the girls ordered; and of course I've +told Elsie nothing about the proposed furnishing of her tent. + +I am bringing my little China boy with me, for I happen to think +that, with the Burtons, we shall be fourteen at table. Gin is not +quite a success as a cook, but he can at least wash dishes, wait at +table, and help Hop Yet in various ways; while I shall be only too +glad to share all your housekeeping cares, if you have not escaped +them even in the wilderness. + +I shall be so glad to see you again; and oh, Truth, I am so happy, so +happy, that, please God, I can keep my child after all! The weary +burden of dread is lifted off my heart, and I feel young again. Just +think of it! My Elsie will be well and strong once more! It seems +too good to be true. + +Always your attached friend, +JANET HOWARD. + + +Mrs. Winship's voice quivered as she read the last few words, and +Polly and Bell threw themselves into each other's arms and cried for +sheer gladness. + +'Come, come, dears! I suppose you will make grand preparations, and +there is no time to lose. One of you must find somebody to help +Philip unload the team. Papa and the boys have gone fishing, and +Laura and Margery went with them, I think.' And Mrs. Winship bustled +about, literally on hospitable thoughts in-tent. + +Polly tied on her sun-bonnet with determination, turned up her +sleeves as if washing were the thing to be done, and placed her arms +akimbo. + +'First and foremost,' said she, her eyes sparkling with excitement, +'first and foremost, I am going to blow the horn.' + +'Certainly not,' said Aunt Truth. 'Are you crazy, Polly? It is +scarcely ten o'clock, and everybody would think it was dinnertime, +and come home at once.' + +'No, they'd think something had happened to Dicky,' said Bell, 'and +that would bring them in still sooner.' + +'Of course! I forgot. But can't I blow it earlier than usual? +Can't I blow it at half-past eleven instead of twelve? We can't do a +thing without the boys, and they may not come home until midnight +unless we do something desperate. Oh, delight! There's Don S. D. M. +F. H. N., and Phil has found Pancho to help unload.' + +'Isn't it lucky that we decided on the place for Elsie's tent, and +saved it in case she should ever come?' said Bell. 'Now Philip and +Pancho can set it up whenever they choose. And isn't it fortunate +that we three stayed at home to-day, and refused to fish? now we can +plan everything, and then all work together when they come back.' + +Meanwhile Polly was tugging at an immense bundle, literally tooth and +nail, as she alternated trembling clutches of the fingers with +frantic bites at the offending knot. + +Like many of her performances, the physical strength expended was out +of all proportion to the result produced, and one stroke of Philip's +knife accomplished more than all her ill-directed effort. At length +the bundle of awning cloth stood revealed. 'Oh, isn't it beautiful?' +she cried, 'it will be the very prettiest tent in camp; can't I blow +the horn?' + +'Look, mamma,' exclaimed Bell, 'it is green and grey, in those pretty +broken stripes, and the edge is cut in lovely scollops and bound with +green braid. Won't it look pretty among the trees?' + +Aunt Truth came out to join the admiring group. + +'O-o-o-h!' screamed Polly. 'There comes a piece of the floor. +They've sent it all made, in three pieces. What fun! We'll have it +all up and ready to sleep in before we blow the horn!' + +'And here's a roll of straw matting,' said Phil, depositing a huge +bundle on the ground near the girls. 'I'll cut the rope to save your +teeth!' + +'Green and white plaid!' exclaimed Bell. 'Well! Mrs. Howard did +have her wits about her!' + +'Oh, do let me blow the horn!' teased the irrepressible Polly. + +'Here are a looking-glass and a towel-rack and a Shaker rocking- +chair,' called Philip; 'guess they're going to stay the rest of the +summer.' + +'Yes, of course they wouldn't want a looking-glass if they were only +going to stay a month or two,' laughed Bell. + +'Dear Aunt Truth, if you won't let me turn a single decorous little +hand-spring, or blow the horn, or do anything nice, will you let us +use all that new white mosquito-netting? Bell says that it has been +in the storehouse for two years, and it would be just the thing for +decorating Elsie's tent.' + +'Why, of course you may have it, Polly, and anything else that you +can find. There! I hear Dicky's voice in the distance; perhaps the +girls are coming.' + +Bell and Polly darted through the swarm of tents, and looked up the +narrow path that led to the brook. + +Sure enough, Margery and Laura were strolling towards home with +little Anne and Dick dangling behind, after the manner of children. +Margery carried a small string of trout, and Dick the inevitable tin +pail in which he always kept an unfortunate frog or two. The girls +had discovered that he was in the habit of crowding the cover tightly +over the pail and keeping his victims shut up for twenty-four hours, +after which, he said, they were nice and tame--so very tame, as it +transpired, that they generally gave up the ghost in a few hours +after their release. Margery had with difficulty persuaded him of +his cruelty, and the cover had been pierced with a certain number of +air-holes. + +'Guess the loveliest thing that could possibly happen!' called Bell +at the top of her voice. + +'Elsie has come,' answered Margery in a second, nobody knew why; 'let +me hug her this minute!' + +'With those fish?' laughed Polly. 'No! you'll have to wait until day +after to-morrow, and then your guess will be right. Isn't it almost +too good to be true?' + +'And she is almost well,' added Bell, joyfully, slipping her arm +through Margery's and squeezing it in sheer delight. 'Mrs. Howard +says she is really and truly better. Oh, if Elsie Howard in bed is +the loveliest, dearest thing in the world, what will it be like to +have her out of it and with us in all our good times!' + +'Has she always been ill since you knew her?' asked Laura. + +'Yes; a terrible cold left her with weakness of the lungs, and the +doctors feared consumption, but thought that she might possibly +outgrow it entirely if she lived in a milder climate; so Mrs. Howard +left home and everybody she cared for, and brought Elsie to Santa +Barbara. Papa has taken an interest in her from the first, and as +far as we girls are concerned, it was love at first sight. You never +knew anybody like Elsie!' + +'Is she pretty?' + +'Pretty!' cried Polly, 'she is like an angel in a picture-book!' + +'Interesting?' + +'Interesting!' said Bell, in a tone that showed the word to be too +feeble for the subject; 'Elsie is more interesting than all the other +girls in the other world put together!' + +'Popular?' + +'Popular!' exclaimed Margery, taking her turn in the oral +examination, 'I don't know whether anybody can be popular who is +always in bed; but if it's popular to be adored by every man, woman, +child, and animal that comes anywhere near her, why then Elsie is +popular.' + +'And is she a favourite with boys as well as girls?' + +'Favourite!' said Bell. 'Why, they think that she is simply perfect! +Of course she has scarcely been able to sit up a week at a time for a +year, and naturally she has not seen many people; but, if you want a +boy's opinion, just ask Philip or Geoffrey. I assure you, Laura, +after you have known Elsie a while, and have seen the impression she +makes upon everybody, you will want to go to bed and see if you can +do likewise.' + +'It isn't just the going to bed,' remarked Margery, sagely. + +'And it isn't the prettiness either,' added Polly; 'though if you saw +Elsie asleep, a flower in one hand, the other under her cheek, her +hair straying over the pillow (O for hair that would stray +anywhere!), you would expect every moment to see a halo above her +head.' + +'I don't believe it is because she is good that everybody admires her +so,' said Laura, 'I don't think goodness in itself is always so very +interesting; if Elsie had freckles and a snub nose'--('Don't mind +me!' murmured Polly)--'you would find that people would say less +about her wonderful character.' + +'There are things that puzzle me,' said Polly, thoughtfully. 'It +seems to me that if I could contrive to be ever so good, nobody ever +would look for a halo round my head. Now, is it my turned-up nose +and red hair that make me what I am, or did what I am make my nose +and hair what they are--which?' + +'We'll have to ask Aunt Truth,' said Margery; 'that is too difficult +a thing for us to answer.' + +'Wasn't it nice I catched that big bull-frog, Margie?' cried Dick, +his eyes shining with anticipation. 'Now I'll have as many as seven +or 'leven frogs and lots of horned toads when Elsie comes, and she +can help me play with 'em.' + +When the girls reached the tents again, the last article had been +taken from the team and Manuel had driven away. The sound of Phil's +hammer could be heard from the carpenter-shop, and Pancho was already +laying the tent floor in a small, open, sunny place, where the low +boughs of a single sycamore hung so as to protect one of its corners, +leaving the rest to the full warmth of the sunshine that was to make +Elsie entirely well again. + +'I am tired to death,' sighed Laura, throwing herself down in a +bamboo lounging-chair. 'Such a tramp as we had! and after all, the +boys insisted on going where Dr. Winship wouldn't allow us to follow, +so that we had to stay behind and fish with the children; I wish I +had stayed at home and read The Colonel's Daughter.' + +'Oh, Laura!' remonstrated Margery, 'think of that lovely pool with +the forests of maiden-hair growing all about it!' + +'And poison-oak,' grumbled Laura. 'I know I walked into some of it +and shall look like a perfect fright for a week. I shall never make +a country girl--it's no use for me to try.' + +'It's no use for you to try walking four miles in high-heeled shoes, +my dear,' said Polly, bluntly. + +'They are not high,' retorted Laura, 'and if they are, I don't care +to look like a--a--cow-boy, even in the backwoods.' + +'I'm an awful example,' sighed Polly, seating herself on a stump in +front of the tent, and elevating a very dusty little common-sense +boot. 'Sir Walter Raleigh would never have allowed me to walk on his +velvet cloak with that boot, would he, girls? Oh, wasn't that +romantic, though? and don't I wish that I had been Queen Elizabeth!' + +'You've got the HAIR,' said Laura. + +'Thank you! I had forgotten Elizabeth's hair was red; so it was. +This is my court train,' snatching a tablecloth that bung on a hush +near by, and pinning it to her waist in the twinkling of an eye,-- +'this my farthingale,' dangling her sun-bonnet from her belt,--'this +my sceptre,' seizing a Japanese umbrella,--'this my crown,' inverting +a bright tin plate upon her curly head. 'She is just alighting from +her chariot, THUS; the courtiers turn pale, THUS; (why don't you do +it?) what shall be done? The Royal Feet must not be wet. "Go round +the puddle? Prit, me Lud, 'Od's body! Forsooth! Certainly not! +Remove the puddle!" she says haughtily to her subjects. They are +just about to do so, when out from behind a neighbouring chaparral +bush stalks a beautiful young prince with coal-black hair and rose- +red cheeks. He wears a rich velvet cloak, glittering with +embroidery. He sees not her crown, her hair outshines it; he sees +not her sceptre, her tiny hand conceals it; he sees naught save the +loathly mud. He strips off his cloak and floats it on the puddle. +With a haughty but gracious bend of her head the Queen accepts the +courtesy; crosses the puddle, THUS, waves her sceptre, THUS, and +saying, "You shall hear from me by return mail, me Lud," she vanishes +within the castle. The next morning she makes Sir Walter British +Minister to Florida. He departs at once with a cargo of tobacco, +which he exchanges for sweet potatoes, and everybody is happy ever +after.' + +The girls were convulsed with mirth at this historical romance, and, +as Mrs. Winship wiped the tears of merriment from her eyes, Polly +seized the golden opportunity and dropped on her knees beside her. + +'Please, Aunt Truth, we can't get the white mosquito-netting because +Dr. Winship has the key of the storehouse in his pocket, and so--may- +-I--blow the horn?' + +Mrs. Winship gave her consent in despair, and Polly went to the oak- +tree where the horn hung and blew all the strength of her lungs into +blast after blast for five minutes. + +'That's all I needed,' she said, on returning; 'that was an escape- +valve, and I shall be lady-like and well-behaved the rest of the +day.' + + + +CHAPTER VI: QUEEN ELSIE VISITS THE COURT + + + +'An hour and friend with friend will meet, +Lip cling to lip and hand clasp hand.' + + +'Now, Laura,' asked Bell, when quiet was restored, 'advise us about +Elsie's tent. We want it to be perfectly lovely; and you have such +good taste!' + +'Let me think,' said Laura. 'Oh, if she were only a brunette instead +of a blonde, we could festoon the tent with that yellow tarlatan I +brought for the play!' + +'What difference does it make whether she is dark or light?' asked +Bell, obtusely. + +'Why, a room ought to be as becoming as a dress--so Mrs. Pinkerton +says. You know I saw a great deal of her at the hotel; and oh, +girls! her bedroom was the most exquisite thing you ever saw! She +had a French toilet-table, covered with pale blue silk and white +marquise lace,--perfectly lovely,--with yards and yards of robin's- +egg blue watered ribbon in bows; and on it she kept all her toilet +articles, everything in hammered silver from Tiffany's with monograms +on the back,--three or four sizes of brushes, and combs, and mirrors, +and a full manicure set. It used to take her two hours to dress; but +it was worth it. Oh, such gorgeous tea-gowns as she had! One of old +rose and lettuce was a perfect dream! She always had her breakfast +in bed, you know. I think it's delightful to have your breakfast +before you get up, and dress as slowly as you like. I wish mamma +would let me do it.' + +'What does she do after she gets dressed in her rows of old lettuce-- +I mean her old rows of lettuce?' asked Polly. + +'Do? Why really, Polly, you are too stupid! What do you suppose she +did? What everybody else does, of course.' + +'Oh!' said Polly, apologetically. + +'How old is Mrs. Pinkerton?' asked Margery. + +'Between nineteen and twenty. There is not three years' difference +in our ages, though she has been married nearly two years. It seems +so funny.' + +'Only nineteen!' cried Bell. 'Why, I always thought that she was old +as the hills--twenty-five or thirty at the very least. She always +seemed tired of things.' + +'Well,' said Laura, in a whisper intended to be too low to reach Mrs. +Winship's tent, 'I don't know whether I ought to repeat what was told +me in confidence, but the fact is--well--she doesn't like Mr. +Pinkerton very well!' + +The other girls, who had not enjoyed the advantages of city life and +travel, looked as dazed as any scandalmonger could have desired. + +'Don't like him!' gasped Polly, nearly falling off the stump. 'Why, +she's married to him!' + +'Where on earth were you brought up?' snapped Laura. 'What +difference does that make? She can't help it if she doesn't happen +to like her husband, can she? You can't make yourself like anybody, +can you?' + +'Well, did she ever like him?' asked Margery; 'for she's only been +married a year or two, and it seems to me it might have lasted that +long if there was anything to begin on.' + +'But,' whispered Laura, mysteriously, 'you see Mr. Pinkerton was very +rich and the Dentons very poor. Mr. Denton had just died, leaving +them nothing at all to live on, and poor Jessie would have had to +teach school, or some dreadful thing like that. The thought of it +almost killed her, she is so sensitive and so refined. She never +told me so in so many words, but I am sure she married Mr. Pinkerton +to save her mother from poverty; and I pity her from the bottom of my +heart.' + +'I suppose it was noble,' said Bell, in a puzzled tone, 'if she +couldn't think of any other way, but--' + +'Well, did she try very hard to think of other ways?' asked Polly. +'She never looked especially noble to me. I thought she seemed like +a die-away, frizzlygig kind of a girl.' + +'I wish, Miss Oliver, that you would be kind enough to remember that +Mrs. Pinkerton is one of my most intimate friends,' said Laura, +sharply. 'And I do wish, also, that you wouldn't talk loud enough to +be heard all through the canyon.' + +The colour came into Polly's cheeks, but before she could answer, +Mrs. Winship walked in, stocking-basket in hand, and seated herself +in the little wicker rocking-chair. Polly's clarion tones had given +her a clue to the subject, and she thought the discussion needed +guidance. + +'You were talking about Mrs. Pinkerton, girls,' she said, serenely. +'You say you are fond of her, Laura, dear, and it seems very +ungracious for me to criticise your friend; that is a thing which +most of us fail to bear patiently. But I cannot let you hold her up +as an ideal to be worshipped, or ask the girls to admire as a piece +of self-denial what I fear was nothing but indolence and self- +gratification. You are too young to talk of these things very much; +but you are not too young to make up your mind that when you agree to +live all your life long with a person, you must have some other +feeling than a determination not to teach school. Jessie Denton's +mother, my dear Laura, would never have asked the sacrifice of her +daughter's whole life; and Jessie herself would never have made it +had she been less vain, proud, and luxurious in her tastes, and a +little braver, more self-forgetting and industrious. These are hard +words, dear, and I am sorry to use them. She has gained the riches +she wanted,--the carriages and servants, and tea-gowns, and hammered +silver from Tiffany's, but she looks tired and disappointed, as Bell +says; and I've no doubt she is, poor girl.' + +'I don't think you do her justice, Mrs. Winship; I don't, indeed,' +said Laura. + +'If you are really attached to her, Laura, don't make the mistake of +admiring her faults of character, but try to find her better +qualities, and help her to develop them. It is a fatal thing when +girls of your age set up these false standards, and order their lives +by them. There are worse things than school-teaching, yes, or even +floor-scrubbing or window-washing. Lovely tea-gowns and silver- +backed brushes are all very pretty and nice to have, if they are not +gained at the sacrifice of something better. I should have said to +my daughter, had I been Mrs. Denton, "We will work for each other, my +darling, and try to do whatever God gives us to do; but, no matter +how hard life is, your heart is the most precious thing in the world, +and you must never sell that, if we part with everything else." Oh, +my girls, my girls, if I could only make you believe that "poor and +content is rich, and rich enough." I cannot bear to think of your +growing year by year into the conviction that these pretty glittering +things of wealth are the true gold of life which everybody seeks. +Forgive me, Laura, if I have hurt your feelings.' + +'I know you would never hurt anybody's feelings, if you could help +it, Mrs. Winship,' Laura answered, with a hint of coldness in her +voice, 'though I can't help thinking that you are a little hard on +poor Jessie; but, even then, one can surely like a person without +wishing to do the very same things she does.' + +'Yes, that is true,' said Mrs. Winship, gravely. 'But one cannot +constantly justify a wrong action in another without having one's own +standard unconsciously lowered. What we continually excuse in other +people we should be inclined by and by to excuse in ourselves. Let +us choose our friends as wisely as possible, and love them dearly, +helping them to grow worthier of our love at the same time we are +trying to grow worthier of theirs; because "we live by admiration, +hope, and love," you know, but not by admiring and loving the wrong +things. + +'But there is the horn, and I hear the boys. Let us come to +luncheon, and tell our good news of Elsie.' + + +[Music follows] +With incredible energy. +The horn! The horn! The lus-ty, lus-ty horn! 'Tis +not a thing to laugh to scorn, A thing to laugh to scorn! + + +Long before the boys appeared in sight, their voices rang through the +canyon in a chorus that woke the echoes, and presently they came into +view, bearing two quarters and a saddle of freshly killed mutton, +hanging from a leafy branch swung between Jack's sturdy shoulder and +Geoff's. + +'A splendid "still hunt" this morning, Aunt Truth!' exclaimed Jack. +'Game plenty and not too shy, dogs in prime condition, hunters ditto. +Behold the result!' + +The girls could scarcely tell whether or no Laura was offended at +Aunt Truth's unexpected little lecture. She did not appear quite as +unrestrained as usual, but as everybody was engaged in the +preparations for Elsie's welcome there was a general atmosphere of +hilarity and confusion, so that no awkwardness was possible. + +The tool-shop resounded with blows of hammer and steel. Dicky was +under everybody's feet, and his 'seven or ten frogs,' together with +his unrivalled collection of horned toads, were continually escaping +from their tin pails and boxes in the various tents, and everybody +was obliged to join in the search to recover and re-incarcerate them, +in order to keep the peace. + +Hop Yet was making a gold and silver cake, with 'Elsie' in pink +letters on chocolate frosting. Philip had pitched the new tent so +that in one corner there was a slender manzanita-tree which had been +cropped for some purpose or other. He had nailed a cross-piece on +this, so that it resembled the letter T, and was now laboriously +boring holes and fitting in pegs, that Elsie might have a sort of +closet behind her bed. + +As for the rustic furniture, the girls and boys declared it to be too +beautiful for words. They stood in circles about it and admired it +without reserve, each claiming that his own special piece of work was +the gem of the collection. The sunlight shining through the grey and +green tints of the tent was voted perfection, Philip's closet a +miracle of ingenuity, the green and white straw matting an +inspiration. + +The looking-glass had been mounted on a packing-box, and converted by +Laura into a dressing-table that rivalled Mrs. Pinkerton's; for green +tarlatan and white mosquito-netting had been so skilfully combined +that the traditional mermaid might have been glad to make her toilet +there 'with a comb and a glass in her hand.' The rest of the green +and white gauzy stuff had been looped from the corners of the tent to +the centre of the roof-piece, and delicate tendrils of wild clematis +climbed here and there as if it were growing, its roots plunged in +cunningly hidden bottles of water. Bell had gone about with pieces +of awning cloth and green braid, and stitched an elaborate system of +pockets on the inside of the tent wherever they would not be too +prominent. There were tiny pockets for needle-work, thimbles, and +scissors, medium-sized pockets for soap and combs and brushes, bigger +pockets for shoes and slippers and stockings, and mammoth pockets for +anything else that Elsie might ordain to put in a pocket. + +By four o'clock in the afternoon Margery had used her clever fingers +to such purpose that a white silesia flag, worked with the camp name, +floated from the tip top of the front entrance to the tent. The +ceremony of raising the flag was attended with much enthusiasm, and +its accomplishment greeted by a deafening cheer from the entire +party. + +'Unless one wants Paradise,' sighed Margery, 'who wouldn't be +contented with dear Camp Chaparral?' + +'Who would live in a house, any way?' exclaimed Philip. 'Sniff this +air, and look up at that sky!' + +'And this is what they call "roughing it," in Santa Barbara,' quoth +Dr. Winship. 'Why, you youngsters have made that tent fit for the +occupancy of a society belle.' + +'Now, let's organise for reception!' cried Geoffrey. 'Assemble, good +people! Come over here, Aunt Truth! I will take the chair myself, +since I don't happen to see anybody who would fill it with more +dignity.' + +'I am going to mount my broncho and go out on the road to meet my +beloved family,' said Jack, sauntering up to the impromptu council- +chamber. + +'How can you tell when they will arrive?' asked Mrs. Winship. + +'I can make a pretty good guess. They'll probably start from Tacitas +as early as eight or nine o'clock, if Elsie is well. Let's see: +it's about twenty-five miles, isn't it, Uncle Doc? Say twenty-three +to the place where they turn off the main road. Well, I'll take a +bit of lunch, ride out ten or twelve miles, hitch my horse in the +shade, and wait.' + +'Very well,' said Geoffrey. 'It is not usual for committees to +appoint themselves, but as you are a near relative of our +distinguished guests we will grant you special consideration and +order you to the front. Ladies and gentlemen, passing over the +slight informality of the nomination, all in favour of appointing Mr. +John Howard Envoy Extraordinary please manifest it by the usual +sign.' + +Six persons yelled 'Ay,' four raised the right hand, and one stood +up. + +'There seems to be a slight difference of opinion as to the usual +sign. All right.--Contrary minded!' + +'No!' shouted Polly, at the top of her lungs. + +'It is a unanimous vote,' said Geoffrey, crushingly, bringing down +his fist as an imaginary gavel with incredible force and dignity. +'Dr. and Mrs. Winship, will you oblige the Chair by acting as a +special Reception Committee?' + +'Certainly,' responded the doctor, smilingly. 'Will the Chair kindly +outline the general policy of the committee?' + +'Hm-m-m! Yes, certainly--of course. The Chair suggests that the +Reception Committee--well, that they stay at home and--receive the +guests,--yes, that will do very nicely. All-in-favour-and-so-forth- +it-is-a-vote-and-so-ordered. Secretary will please spread a copy on +the minutes.' Gavel. + +'I rise to a point of order,' said Jack, sagely. 'There is no +secretary and there are no minutes.' + +'Mere form,' said the Chair; 'sit down; there will be minutes in a +minute,--got to do some more things first; that will do, SIT DOWN. +Will the Misses Burton and Messrs. Burton and Noble kindly act as +Committee on Decoration?' + +'Where's the Committee on Music, and Refreshments, and Olympian +Games, and all that sort of thing?' interrupted Polly, who had not +the slightest conception of parliamentary etiquette; 'and why don't +you hurry up and put me on something?' + +'If Miss Oliver refuses to bridle her tongue, and persists in +interrupting the business of the meeting, the Chair will be obliged +to remove her,' said Geoffrey, with chilling emphasis. + +Polly rose again, undaunted. 'I would respectfully ask the Chair, +who put him in the chair, any way?' + +'Question!' roared Philip. + +'Second the motion!' shrieked Bell, that being the only parliamentary +expression she knew. + +'Order!' cried Geoffrey in stentorian accents. 'I will adjourn the +meeting and clear the court-room unless there is order.' + +'Do!' remarked Polly, encouragingly. 'I will rise again, like +Phoebus, from my ashes, to say that--' + +Here Jack sprang to his feet. 'I would suggest to the Chair that the +last speaker amend her motion by substituting the word "Phoenix" for +"Phoebus."' + +'Accept the amendment,' said Polly, serenely, amidst the general +hilarity. + +'Question!' called Bell, with another mighty projection of memory +into a missionary meeting that she had once attended. + +'I am not aware that there is any motion before the house,' said +Geoffrey, cuttingly. + +'Second the motion!' + +'Second the amendment!' shouted the girls. + +'Ladies, there IS no motion. Will you oblige the Chair by remaining +quiet until speech is requested?' + +'Move that the meeting be adjourned and another one called, with a +new Chair!' remarked Margery, who felt that the honour of her sex was +at stake. + +'Move that this motion be so ordered and spread upon the minutes, and +a copy of it be presented to the Chairman,' suggested Philip. + +'Move that the copy be appropriately bound in CALF,' said Jack, +dodging an imaginary blow. + +'Move that the other committees be elected by ballot,' concluded +Scott Burton. + +'This is simply disgraceful!' exclaimed the Chair. 'Order! order! I +appoint Miss Oliver Committee on Entertainment, with a view of +keeping her still.' + +This was received with particular as well as general satisfaction. + +'Miss Winship, we appoint you Committee on Music.' + +'All right. Do you wish it to be original?' + +'Certainly not; we wish it to be good.' + +'But we only know one chorus, and that's "My Witching Dinah Snow."' + +'Never mind; either write new words to that tune or sing tra-la-la to +it. Mr. Richard Winship, the Chair appoints you Committee on +Menagerie, and suggests that as we have proclaimed a legal holiday, +you give your animals the freedom of the city.' + +'Don't know what freedom of er city means,' said Dicky, who feared +that he was being made the butt of ridicule. + +'Why, we want you to allow the captives to parade in the evening, +with torch-lights and mottoes.' + +'All right!' cried Dicky, kindling in an instant; ''n' Luby, 'n' the +doat, 'n' my horn' toads, all e'cept the one that just gotted away in +Laura's bed; but may be she'll find him to-night, so they'll be all +there.' + +This was too much for the various committees, and Laura's wild shriek +was the signal for a hasty adjournment. A common danger restored +peace to the assembly, and they sought the runaway in perfect +harmony. + +'Well,' said Jack, when quiet was restored, 'I am going a little +distance up the Pico Negro trail; there are some magnificent Spanish +bayonets growing there, and if you'll let me have Pancho, Uncle Doc, +we can bring down four of them and lash them to each of the corners +of Elsie's tent,--they'll keep fresh several days in water, you +know.' + +'Take him, certainly,' said Dr. Winship. + +'Do let me go with you!' pleaded Laura, with enthusiasm. 'I should +like the walk so much.' + +'It's pretty rough, Laura,' objected Margery. 'If you couldn't +endure our walk this morning, you would never get home alive from +Pico Negro.' + +'Oh, that was in the heat of the day,' she answered. 'I feel equal +to any amount of walking now, if Jack doesn't mind taking me.' + +'Delighted, of course, Miss Laura. You'll be willing to carry home +one of the trees, I suppose, in return for the pleasure of my +society?' + +'Snub him severely, Laura,' cried Bell; 'we never allow him to say +such things unreproved.' + +'I think he is snubbed too much already,' replied Laura, with a +charming smile, 'and I shall see how a course of encouragement will +affect his behaviour.' + + +'That will be what I long have sought, +And mourned because I found it not,' + + +sang Jack, nonchalantly. + +'Oh, Laura,' remonstrated Bell, 'think twice before you encourage him +in his dreadful ways. We have studied him very carefully, and we +know that the only way to live with him is to keep him in a sort of +"pint pot" where we can hold the lid open just a little, and clap it +down suddenly whenever he tries to spring out.' + +'Do not mind that young person, Miss Laura, but form your own +impressions of my charming character. Excuse me, please, while I put +on a celluloid collar, and make some few changes in my toilet +necessary to a proper appearance in your distinguished company.' + +'I prefer you as you are,' answered Laura, laughingly. 'Let us start +at once.' + +'Do you hear that, young person? She prefers me as I are! Now see +what magic power her generosity has upon me!' And he darted into the +tent, from which he issued in a moment with his Derby hat, a +manzanita cane, a pocket-handkerchief tied about his throat, and a +flower pinned on his flannel camping-shirt--a most ridiculous figure, +since nothing seems so out of place in the woods as any suggestion of +city costumes or customs. Laura was in high good-humour, and looked +exceedingly brilliant and pretty, as she always did when she was the +central figure of any group or the bright particular star of any +occasion. + +'Be home before dark,' said Dr. Winship. 'Pancho, keep a look-out +for the pack-mule. Truth, one of the pack-mules has disappeared.' + +'So? Dumpling or Ditto?' + +'Ditto, curiously enough. His name should have led him not to set an +example, but to follow one.' + + +Elsie came. + +Perhaps you thought that this was going to be an exciting story, and +that something would happen to keep her at the Tacitas ranch; but +nothing did. Everything came to pass exactly as it was arranged, and +Jack met his mother and sister at twelve o'clock some four miles from +the camp, and escorted them to the gates. + +'Welcome' had been painted on twenty different boards or bits of +white cloth and paper, and nailed here and there on the trees that +lined the rough wood-road; the strains of an orchestra, formed of a +guitar, banjo, castanets, Chinese fiddle, and tin cans, greeted them +from a distance, but were properly allowed to die away in silence +when the guest neared the tents. Everything wore a new and smiling +face, and Elsie never came more dangerously near being squeezed to +death. + +Elsie, in the prettiest of gingham dresses, and her cloud of golden +hair braided in two funny little pugs to keep it out of the dust; +Elsie, with a wide hat that shaded her face, already a little tanned +and burned, no longer colourless; Elsie, with no lines of pain in her +pretty forehead, and the hollow ring gone from her voice; Elsie, who +jumped over the wheel of the wagon, and hugged her huggers with the +strength of a young bear! It was too good to believe, and nobody did +quite believe it for days. + +At three o'clock the happiest party in the world assembled at the +rough dining-table under the sycamore-trees. + +Elsie beamed upon the feast from the high-backed manzanita chair, a +faint colour in her cheeks, and starry prisms of light in a pair of +eyes that had not sparkled for many a weary month. Hop Yet smiled a +trifle himself, wore his cap with a red button on the top to wait +upon the table, and ministered to the hungry people with more +interest and alacrity than he had shown since he had been dragged +from Santa Barbara, his Joss, and his nightly game of fantan. And +such a dinner as he had prepared in honour of the occasion!--longer +by four courses than usual, and each person was allowed two plates in +the course of the meal. + + +BILL OF FARE FOR HER MAJESTY'S DINNER + +Quail Soup. Crackers. + Chili Colorado. +(Mutton stew, in Spanish style, + with Chili peppers, tomatoes, + and onions.) +Cold Boiled Ham. Fried Potatoes. + Apples and Onions stewed together. +Ginger-snaps. Pickles. + Peaches, Apricots, and Nectarines. +California Nuts and Raisins. + Coffee. + + +And last of all, a surprise of Bell's, flapjacks, long teased for by +the boys, and prepared and fried by her own hands while the merry +party waited at table, to get them smoking hot. + +She came in flushed with heat and pride, the prettiest cook anybody +ever saw, with her hair bobbed up out of the way and doing its best +to escape, a high-necked white apron, sleeves rolled up to the elbow, +and an insinuating spot of batter in the dimple of her left cheek. + +'There!' she cried, joyfully, as she deposited a heaping plate in +front of her mother, and set the tin can of maple syrup by its side. +'Begin on those, and I'll fry like lightning on two griddles to keep +up with you,' and she rushed to the brush kitchen to turn her next +instalments that had been left to brown. Hop Yet had retired to a +distant spot by the brook, and was washing dish-towels. All Chinese +cooks are alike in their horror of a woman in the kitchen; but some +of them will unbend so far as to allow her to amuse herself so long +as they are not required to witness the disagreeable spectacle. + +Bell delicately inserted the cake-turner under the curled edges of +the flapjacks and turned them over deftly, using a little too much +force, perhaps, in the downward stroke when she flung them back on +the griddle. + +'Seems to me they come down with considerable of a thud,' she said, +reflectively. 'I hope they're not tough, for I should never hear the +last of it. Guess I'll punch one with the handle of this tin shovel, +and see how it acts. Goodness! it's sort of--elastic. That's funny. +Well, perhaps it's the way they ought to look.' Here she transferred +the smoking mysteries to her plate, passed a bit of pork over the +griddles, and, after ladling out eight more, flew off to the group at +the table. + +'Are they good?' she was beginning to ask, when the words were frozen +on her lips by the sight of a significant tableau. + +The four boys were standing on the bench that served instead of +dining-chairs, each with a plate and a pancake on the table in front +of them. Jack held a hammer and spike, Scott Burton a hatchet, +Geoffrey a saw, and Philip a rifle. Bell was nothing if not +intuitive. No elaborate explanations ever were needed to show her a +fact. Without a word she flung the plate of flapjacks she held as +far into a thicket as she had force to fling it, and then dropped on +her knees. + + +"'Shoot, if you must, this old grey head, +But spare my flapjacks, sirs," she said! + + +'What's the matter with them? Tough? I refuse to believe it. Your +tools are too dull,--that's all. Use more energy! Nothing in this +world can be accomplished without effort.' + +'They're a lovely brown,' began Mrs. Winship, sympathetically. + +'And they have a very good flavour,' added Elsie. + +'Don't touch them, dearest!' cried Bell, snatching the plate from +under Elsie's very nose. 'I won't have you made ill by my failures. +But as for the boys, I don't care a fig for them. Let them make +flapjacks more to their taste, the odious things! Polly Oliver, did +you put in that baking powder, as I told you, while I went for the +pork?' + +Polly blanched. 'Baking powder?' she faltered. + +'Yes, baking powder! B-A-K-I-N-G P-O-W-D-E-R! Do I make myself +plain?' + +'Oh, baking powder, to be sure. Well, now that you mention the +matter, I do remember that Dicky called me away just as I was getting +it; and now that I think of it, Elsie came just afterwards, and--and- +-' + +'And that's the whole of my story, O,' sang Jack. 'I recommend the +criminal to the mercy of the court.' + +'A case of too many cooks,' laughed Dr. Winship. 'Cheer up, girls; +better fortune next time.' + +'There are eight more of them burning on the griddles this moment, +Polly,' said Bell, scathingly; 'and as they are yours, not mine, I +advise you to throw them in the brook, with the rest of the batter, +so that Hop Yet won't know that there has been a failure.' + +'Some people blight everything they touch,' sighed Polly, gloomily, +as she departed for the kitchen. + + +'But when I lie in the green kirkyard - + + +'Oh, Polly, dear,' interrupted Margery, 'that apology will not serve +any longer; you've used it too often.' + +'This is going to be entirely different,' continued Polly, +tragically. + + +'But when I lie in the green kirkyard, + With the mould upon my breasts +Say not that she made flapjacks well, + Only, she did her best.' + + +'We promise!' cried Bell. + + + +CHAPTER VII: POLLY'S BIRTHDAY: FIRST HALF +IN WHICH SHE REJOICES AT THE MERE FACT OF HER EXISTENCE. + + + +'"O frabjous day! Calooh! Callay!" +He chortled in his joy.' + + +Polly's birthday dawned auspiciously. At six o'clock she was kissed +out of a sound sleep by Bell and Margery, and the three girls slipped +on their wrappers, and prepared to run through the trees for a +morning plunge in Mirror Pool. Although it was August there was +still water enough in Minnehaha Brook to give one a refreshing dip. +Mirror Pool was a quarter of a mile distant and well guarded with +rocks and deep hidden in trees; but a little pathway had been made to +the water's edge, and thus the girls had easy access to what they +called The Mermaid's Bath. A bay-tree was adorned with a little +redwood sign, which bore a picture of a mermaid, drawn by Margery, +and below the name these lines in rustic letters:- + + + 'A hidden brook, +That to the sleeping woods all night +Singeth a quiet tune.' + + +Laura had not lived long enough in the woods to enjoy these cold +plunges; and, as her ideal was a marble tub, with scented water, and +a French maid to apply the same with a velvet sponge, it is not much +wonder. She insisted that, though it was doubtless a very romantic +proceeding, the bottom and sides of the natural tub were quite too +rocky and rough for her taste, and that she should be in constant +terror of snakes curling round her toes. + +'I've a great mind to wake Laura, just for once,' said Bell, opening +the tent door. 'There never was such a morning! (I believe I've +said that regularly every day; but I simply never can get used to +it.) There must have been a wonderful sunrise, dears, for the glow +hasn't faded yet. Not a bit of morning fog--that's good for Elsie. +And what a lovely day for a birthday! Did they use to give you +anything like this in Vermont, Polly?' + +'Hardly,' said Polly, peering over Bell's shoulder. 'Let's see. +What did they give us in Vermont this month? Why, I can't think of +anything but dog-days, hot nights, and hay fever; but that sounds +ungrateful. Why, Geoff's up already! There's Elsie's bunch of +vines, and twigs, and pretty things hanging on her tent-door. He's +been off on horseback. Just my luck to have him get up first. Jack +always does, you know; and last night I sewed up the tent-opening +with carpet-thread, good and tight, overhand--stitches I wouldn't be +ashamed of at a sewing-school.' + +'Oh you naughty girl!' laughed Bell. 'The boys could rip it open +with a knife in half the time it took you to sew it.' + +'Certainly. I didn't mean to keep them sewed up all day; but I +thought I'd like Jack to remember me the first thing this morning.' + +'Girls,' whispered Margery, excitedly, 'don't stand there mooning--or +sunning--for ever! I thought there was a gopher in this tent last +night. I heard something scratching, and I thought it was the dog +outside; but just look at these two holes almost under Laura's +pillow!' + +'Let's fill them up, cover them over--anything!' gasped Bell. 'Laura +will never sleep here another night if she sees them.' + +'Nobody insured Laura against gophers,' said Polly. 'She must take +the fortunes of war.' + +'I wouldn't wake her,' said Margery. 'She didn't sleep well, and her +face is flushed. Come, or we shall be late for breakfast.' + +When they returned, fresh and rosy, from their bath, there was a stir +of life in all the tents. Pancho had come from the stage-station +with mail; an odour of breakfast issued from the kitchen, where Hop +Yet was humming a fragment of Chinese song, that ran something like +this,--not loud, but unearthly enough, as Bell used to say, to spoil +almost any cooking:- + +[Music follows] +Fong fong mongmong tiu he sun yi-u +sow chong how ki-u me yun tan-tar che ku choi song! + + +Dicky was abroad, radiant in a new suit of clothes, and Elsie pushed +her golden head out between the curtains, and proclaimed herself +strong enough for a wrestling-match with any boy or man about the +camp. + +But they found Laura sitting on the edge of her straw bed, directly +over the concealed gopher-holes, a mirror in her hand and an +expression of abject misery on her countenance. + +'What's the matter?' cried the girls in one breath. But they needed +no answer, as she turned her face towards the light, for it was +plainly a case of poison-oak--one eye almost closed, and the cheek +scarlet and swollen. + +'Where do you suppose you got it?' asked Bell. + +'Oh, I don't know. It's everywhere; so I don't see how I ever hoped +to escape it. Yet I've worn gloves every minute. I think I must +have touched it when I went up the mountain trail with Jack. I'm a +perfect fright already, and I suppose it has only begun.' + +'Is it very painful?' asked Polly, sympathetically. 'Oh, you do look +so funny, I can hardly help laughing, but I'm as sorry as I can be.' + +'I should expect you to laugh--you generally do,' retorted Laura. +'No, it's not painful yet; but I don't care about that--it's looking +so ridiculous. I wonder if Dr. Winship could send me home. I wish +now that I had gone with Scott, for I can't be penned up in this tent +a week.' + +'Oh, it won't hurt you to go out,' said Bell, 'and you can lie in the +sitting-room. Just wait, and let mamma try and cure you. She's a +famous doctor.' And Bell finished dressing hurriedly, and went to +her mother's tent, while Polly and Margery smoothed the bed with a +furtive kick of straw over the offending gopher-holes, and hung a +dark shawl so as to shield Laura's eyes. + +Aunt Truth entered speedily, with a family medical guide under one +arm, and a box of remedies under the other. + +'The doctor has told me just what to do, and he will see you after +breakfast himself. It doesn't look so very bad a case, dear; don't +run about in the sun for a day or two, and we'll bring you out all +right. The doctor has had us all under treatment at some time or +other, because of that troublesome little plant.' + +'I don't want to get up to breakfast,' moaned Laura. + +'Just as you like. But it is Polly's birthday, you know (many happy +returns, my sweet Pollykins), and there are great preparations going +on.' + +'I can't help it, Mrs. Winship. The boys would make fun of my looks; +and I shouldn't blame them.' + +'Appear as the Veiled Lady,' suggested Margery, as Mrs. Winship went +out. + +'I won't come, and that's the end of it,' said Laura. 'Perhaps if I +bathe my face all the morning I can come to dinner.' + +After breakfast was cleared away, Hop Yet and Mrs. Howard's little +China boy Gin were given a half-holiday, and allowed to go to a-- +neighbouring ranch to see a 'flend' of Hop Yet's; for it was a part +of the birthday scheme that Bell and Geoffrey should cook the +festival dinner. + +Jack was so delighted at the failure of Polly's scheme to sew him in +his tent, that he simply radiated amiability, and spent the whole +morning helping Elsie and Margery with a set of elaborate dinner- +cards, executed on half-sheets of note-paper. + +The dinner itself was a grand success. Half of the cards bore a +caricature of Polly in the shape of a parrot, with the inscription +'Polly want a cracker?' The rest were adorned with pretty sketches +of her in her camping-dress, a kettle in one hand, and underneath, + + +'Polly, put the kettle on, +We'll all have tea.' + + +This was the bill of fare arranged by Bell and Geoffrey, and written +on the reverse side of the dinner-cards + + +DINNER A LA MOTHER GOOSE. +CAMP CHAPARRAL. +August 15, 18-. + +'Come with a whoop, come with a call; +Come with a good will, or not at all.' + +'VICTUALS AND DRINK.' + +BEAN SOUP. +'She gave them some broth, she gave them some bread.' +SALT CODFISH. +'You shall have a fishy +In a little dishy.' +ROAST MUTTON A LA VENISON. +'Dear sensibility, O la! +I heard a little lamb cry ba-a!' +POTATOES IN JACKETS. +'The butcher, the baker, the candlestick-maker, +All jumped out of a roasted potato.' +STEWED BEANS. +'You, nor I, nor nobody knows, +Where oats, peas, beans, and barley grows.' +CHICKEN AND BEEF SANDWICHES. +'Hickety, pickety, my pretty hen +Laid good eggs for gentlemen.' +Taffy was a Welshman, Taffy was a thief, +Taffy came to my house and stole a piece of beef.' +LEMON PIE. +'A pie sat on a pear-tree.' +PLUM TARTS. +'The Queen of Hearts, she made some tarts, +All on a summer's day.' +FRUIT, NUTS, AND RAISINS. +'You shall have an apple, +You shall have a plum.' +'I had a little nut-tree, nothing would it bear +But a silver nutmeg and a golden pear.' +BREAD AND CHEESE. +'When I was a bachelor I lived by myself, +And all the bread and cheese I got I put upon the shelf.' +COFFEE AND LEMONADE. +'One, two, three, how good you be! +I love coffee and Billy loves tea.' +'Oranges and lemons, +Says the bell of St. Clemen's.' + +'What they ate I can't tell, +But 'tis known very well +That none of the party grew fat.' + + +Bell and Geoff took turns at 'dishing up' in the kitchen, and sat +down at the table between whiles; and they barely escaped being +mobbed when they omitted one or two dishes on the programme, and +confessed that they had been put on principally for the 'style' of +the thing,--a very poor excuse to a company of people who have made +up their mouths for all the delicacies of the season. + +Jack was head waiter, and having donned a clean white blouse of Hop +Yet's and his best cap with the red button, from which dangled a +hastily improvised queue of black worsted, he proceeded to convulse +everybody with his Mongolian antics. These consisted of most +informal remarks in clever pigeon English, and snatches of Chinese +melody, rendered from time to time as he carried dishes into the +kitchen. Elsie laughed until she cried, and Laura sat in the +shadiest corner, her head artistically swathed in white tarlatan. + +Polly occupied the seat of honour at the end of the table opposite +Dr. Winship, and was happier than a queen. She wore her new green +cambric, with a bunch of leaves at her belt. She was sun-burned, but +the freckles seemed to have disappeared mysteriously from her nose, +and almost any one would have admired the rosy skin, the dancing +eyes, and the graceful little auburn head, 'sunning over with curls.' + +When the last bit of dessert had been disposed of, and Dicky had gone +to sleep in his mother's lap, like an infant boa-constrictor after a +hearty meal, the presentation of gifts and reading of poems took +place; and Polly had to be on the alert to answer all the nonsensical +jokes that were aimed at her. + +Finally, Bell crowned the occasion by producing a song of Miss +Mulock's, which had come in the morning mail from some girl friend of +Polly's in the East, who had discovered that Polly's name had +appeared in poetry and song without her knowledge, and who thought +she might be interested to hear the composition. With the aid of +Bell's guitar and Jack's banjo the girls and boys soon caught the +pretty air, and sung it in chorus. + +1. Pretty Pol-ly Ol-i-ver, will you be my own? +Pret-ty Pol-ly Ol-i-ver, as cold as a +stone; But my love has grown warm-er as +cold-er you've grown, O Pret-ty Pol-ly +Ol-i-ver, will you be my own? + +2. Pret-ty Pol-ly Ol-i-ver, I love you so dear! +Pret-ty Pol-ly Ol-i-ver, my hope and my +fear; I've wait-ed for you, sweet-heart, this +many a long year; For Pret-ty Pol-ly +Ol-i-ver, I've loved you so dear! + +3. Pret-ty Pol-ly Ol-i-ver, I'll bid you good bye: +Pret-ty Pol-ly Ol-i-ver, for you I'll not +die; You'll nev-er get a tru-er true +lov-er than I, So Pret-ty Pol-ly +Ol-i-ver, good-bye, love, good-bye! + + +At the end, Dr. Winship raised his glass of lemonade, and proposed to +drink Miss Oliver's health. This was done with enthusiasm, and +Geoffrey immediately cried, 'Speech, speech!' + +'I can't,' said Polly, blushing furiously. + +'Speech!' sung Jack and Philip vociferously, pounding on the table +with knife-handles to increase the furore. + +'Speech!' demanded the genial doctor, going over to the majority, and +smiling encouragingly at Polly, who was pushed to her feet before she +knew very well what she was doing. 'Oh, if Laura were not looking at +me,' she thought, 'I'd just like to speak right out, and tell them a +little bit of what is in my heart. I don't care--I will!' + +'I know you are all in fun,' she said, looking bravely into the good +doctor's eyes, 'and of course no one could make a proper speech with +Jack grinning like a Cheshire cat, but I can't help telling you that +this is the happiest summer and the happiest birthday of my whole +life, and that I scarcely remember nowadays that I have no father and +no brothers and sisters, for I have never been alone or unhappy since +you took me in among you and Bell chose me for her friend; and I +think that if you knew how grateful I am for my beautiful summer, +dear Dr. Paul and Aunt Truth, you would be glad that you gave it to +me, and I love you all, dearly, dearly, dearly!' Whereupon the +impulsive little creature finished her maiden speech by dashing round +the table and giving Mrs. Winship one of her 'bear hugs,' at which +everybody laughed and rose from the table. + +Laura Burton, who was thoroughly out of conceit with the world, and +who was never quite happy when other people seemed for the moment to +be preferred to herself, thought this burst of affection decidedly +theatrical, but she did not know of any one to whom she could confine +her opinions just then; indeed, she felt too depressed and out of +sorts to join in the general hilarity. + +Dinner being over, Dr. Paul and the boys took the children and +sauntered up the canyon for a lazy afternoon with their books. Elsie +went to sleep in the new hammock that the doctor had hung in the +sycamores back of the girls' sleeping-tent, and Mrs. Winship lay down +for her afternoon nap. Pancho saddled the horses for Bell and +Margery, who went for a gallop. Polly climbed into the sky-parlour +to write a long letter to her mother, and Laura was left to solitude +in the sleeping-tent. Now everybody knows that a tent at midday is +not a particularly pleasant spot, and after many a groan at the glare +of the sun, which could not be tempered by any system of shawls, and +moans at the gopher-holes which she discovered while searching for +her ear-ring, and repeated consultations with the hand-glass at brief +intervals, during which she convinced herself that she looked worse +every minute,--she finally discovered a series of alarming new spots +on her neck and chin. She felt then that camping out was a complete +failure, and that she would be taken home forthwith if it could be +managed, since she saw nothing before her but day after day of close +confinement and unattractive personal appearance. 'It's just my +luck!' she grumbled, as she twisted up her hair and made herself as +presentable as possible under the trying circumstances. 'I don't +think I ever had a becoming or an interesting illness. The chicken- +pox, mumps, and sties on my eyes--that's the sort of thing I have!' + +'I feel much worse, Mrs. Winship,' she said, going into the sitting- +room tent and waking Aunt Truth from a peaceful snooze. 'If you can +spare Pancho over night, I really think I must trouble you to send +Anne and me home at once. I feel as if I wanted to go to bed in a +dark room, and I shall only be a bother if I stay.' + +'Why, my child, I'm sorry to have you go off with your visit +unfinished. You know we don't mind any amount of trouble, if we can +make you comfortable.' + +'You are very kind, but indeed I'd rather go.' + +'I hardly dare let you start in the hot sun--without consulting the +doctor, and everybody is away except Polly; they will feel badly not +to say good-bye.' + +'It is nearly three o'clock now, so the worst of the sun is over, and +we shall be at the ranch by eight this evening. I feel too ill to +say good-bye, any way, and we shall meet Bell and Margery somewhere +on the road, for they were going to the milk ranch.' + +'Very well, my dear, if you've made up your mind I must yield,' +replied Mrs. Winship, getting up and smoothing her hair. 'I don't +dare wake Elsie, she has had such an exciting day; but I'll call +Polly to help you pack, and then tell Pancho to find Anne and harness +the team. While he is doing that, I'll get you a little lunch to +take with you and write a note to your mother. Perhaps you can come +again before we break camp, but I'm sorry to send you home in such a +sad plight.' + + + +CHAPTER VIII: POLLY'S BIRTHDAY: SECOND HALF +IN WHICH SHE WISHES SEE HAD NEVER BEEN BORN. + + + +'From Hebrew wit the maxim sprung, +Though feet should slip, ne'er let the tongue. + + +Polly came at once to the tent, where she found Laura getting her +belongings together. + +'Why, Laura, it seems too bad you should go off so suddenly. What +can I do to help you?' + +The very spirit of evil entered Laura's heart as she looked at Polly, +so fresh and pretty and radiant, with her dimples dancing in and out, +her hair ruffled with the effort of literary composition, and the +glow of the day's happiness still shining in her eyes. She felt as +if Polly was 'glad inside' that she was poisoned; she felt sure she +was internally jumping for joy at her departure; and, above all, she +felt that Polly was entirely too conceited over the attention she had +received that day, and needed to be 'taken down a peg or two.' + +'Red-haired, stuck-up, saucy thing,' she thought, 'how I should like +to give her a piece of my mind before I leave this place, if I only +dared!' + +'I don't need any help, thank you,' she said aloud, in her iciest +manner. + +'But it will only make your head ache to bend over and tug away at +that valise, and I'll be only too glad to do it.' + +'I've no doubt of that,' responded Laura, meaningly. 'It is useless +for you to make any show of regret over my going, for I know +perfectly well that you are glad to get me out of the way.' + +'Why, Laura, what do you mean?' exclaimed Polly, completely dazed at +this bombshell of candour. + +'I mean what I say; and I should have said it before if I could ever +have found a chance. Because I didn't mention it at the time, you +needn't suppose I've forgotten your getting me into trouble with Mrs. +Winship, the day before the Howards came.' + +'That was not my fault,' said Polly, hotly. 'I didn't speak any +louder than the other girls, and I didn't know Aunt Truth objected to +Mrs. Pinkerton, and I didn't know she was anywhere near.' + +'You roared like the bull of Bashan--that's what you did. Perhaps +you can't help your voice, but anybody in the canyon could have heard +you; and Mrs. Winship hasn't been the same to me since, and the boys +don't take the slightest notice of me lately.' + +'You are entirely mistaken, Laura. Dr. and Mrs. Winship are just as +lovely and cordial to you as they are to everybody else, and the boys +do not feel well enough acquainted with you to "frolic" with you as +they do with us.' + +'It isn't so, but you are not sensitive enough to see it; and I +should never have been poisoned if it hadn't been for you!' + +'Oh, go on, do!' said Polly, beginning to lose her self-control, +which was never very great. 'I didn't know I was a Lucrezia Borgia +in disguise. How did I poison you, pray?' + +'I didn't say you poisoned me; but you made me so uncomfortable that +day, bringing down Mrs. Winship's lecture on my head and getting my +best friend abused, that I was glad to get away from the camp, and +went out with Jack for that reason when I was too tired and warm; and +you are always trying to cut me out with Bell and the boys.' + +'That's a perfectly--jet black--fib!' cried Polly, who was now +thoroughly angry; 'and I don't think it is very polite of you to +attack the whole party, and say they haven't been nice to you, when +they've done everything in the world!' + +'It isn't your party any more than mine, is it? And if I don't know +how to be polite, I certainly shan't ask YOU for instruction; for I +must know as much about the manners of good society as you do, +inasmuch as I have certainly seen more of it!' + +Polly sank into a camp-chair, too stunned for a moment to reply, +while Laura, who had gone quite beyond the point where she knew or +cared what she said, went on with a rush of words: 'I mean to tell +you, now that I am started, that anybody who isn't blind can see why +you toady to the Winships, who have money and social position, and +why you are so anxious to keep everybody else from getting into their +good graces; but they are so partial to you that they have given you +an entirely false idea of yourself; and you might as well know that +unless you keep yourself a little more in the background, and grow a +little less bold and affected and independent, other people will not +be quite as ready as the Winships to make a pet of a girl whose +mother keeps a boarding-house.' + +Poor Laura! It was no sooner said than she regretted it--a little, +not much. But poor Polly! Where was her good angel then? Why could +she not have treated this thrust with the silence and contempt it +deserved? But how could Laura have detected and probed the most +sensitive spot in the girl's nature? She lost all command of +herself. Her rage absolutely frightened her, for it made her deaf +and blind to all considerations of propriety and self-respect, and +for a moment she was only conscious of the wild desire to strike-- +yes, even to kill--the person who had so insulted all that was +dearest to her. + +'Don't dare to say another word!' she panted, with such flaming +cheeks and such flashing eyes that Laura involuntarily retreated +towards the door, half afraid of the tempest her words had evoked. +'Don't dare to say another word, or I don't know what I may do! Yes, +I am glad you are going, and everybody will be glad, and the sooner +you go the better! You've made everybody miserable ever since you +came, with your jealousy and your gossip and your fine-lady airs; and +if Aunt Truth hadn't loved your mother, and if we were mean enough to +tell tales, we would have repeated some of your disagreeable speeches +long ago. How can you dare to say I love the Winships for anything +but themselves? And if you had ever seen my darling mother, you +never could have called her a boarding-house keeper, you cruel--' + +Oh, but the dashing torrent of angry words stopped at the mere +mention of her mother. The word recalled her to herself, but too +late. It woke in her memory the clasp of her mother's arms, the +sound of the sweet, tired voice: 'Only two of us against the big +world, Polly--you and I. Be brave, little daughter, brave and +patient.' Oh, how impatient and cowardly she had been! Would she +never learn to be good? The better impulses rushed back into her +heart, and crowded out the bad ones so quickly that in another moment +she would have flung herself at Laura's feet, and implored her +forgiveness merely to gain again her own self-respect and her +mother's approval; but there was no time for repentance (there isn't +sometimes), for the clatter of wheels announced Pancho's approach +with the team, and Mrs. Winship and Anne Burton came into view, +walking rapidly towards the tent. + +Laura was a good deal disconcerted at their ill-timed appearance, but +reflected rapidly that if Mrs. Winship had overheard anything, it was +probably Polly's last speech, in which case that young person would +seem to be more in fault than herself, so stepping out of the tent +she met Mrs. Winship and kissed her good-bye. + +Little Anne ran on and jumped into the wagon, with all a child's joy +at the prospect of going anywhere. Polly's back was turned, but she +could not disappear entirely within the tent without causing Mrs. +Winship surprise; and she went through a lifetime of misery and self- +reproach in that minute of shame and fear, when she dared neither to +advance nor retreat. + +'I don't quite like to let you go alone, Laura, without consulting +the doctor, and I can't find him,' said Mrs. Winship. 'Why, you are +nervous and trembling! Hadn't you better wait until to-morrow?' + +'No, thank you, Mrs. Winship. I am all ready now, and would prefer +to go. I think perhaps I have stayed quite long enough, as Polly has +just told me that everybody is glad to see the last of me, and that +I've made you all miserable since I came. + +This was the climax to Polly's misery; for she was already so +overcome by the thought of her rudeness that she was on the point of +begging Laura's pardon for that particular speech then and there, and +she had only to hear her exact words repeated to feel how they would +sound in Mrs. Winship's ears. + +Mrs. Winship was so entirely taken aback by Laura's remark, that she +could only ejaculate, 'Polly--said--that! What do you mean?' + +'Oh, I am quite ready to think she said more than she intended, but +those were her words.' + +'Polly!' + +Polly turned. Alas! it was plain enough that this was no false +accusation. Her downcast eyes, flushed, tear-stained cheeks, +quivering lips, and the silent shame of her whole figure, spoke too +clearly. + +'Can it be possible, Polly, that you spoke in such a way to a guest +who was about to leave my house?' + +'Yes.' + +The word was wrung from Polly's trembling lips. What could she say +but 'Yes,'--it was true,--and how could she repeat the taunts that +had provoked her to retort? They were not a sufficient excuse; and +for that matter, nothing could be a sufficient excuse for her +language. Now that she was confronted with her own fault, Laura's +seemed so small beside it that she would have been ashamed to offer +it as any justification. + +Mrs. Winship grew pale, and for a moment was quite at a loss as to +the treatment of such a situation. + +'Don't say any more about it, Mrs. Winship,' said Laura; 'we were +both angry, or we should never have forgotten ourselves, and I shall +think no more of it.' Laura spoke with such an air of modest virtue, +and seemed so ready to forgive and forget, that Polly in her silence +and confusion appeared worse than ever. + +'But I want you to remember that you are my guest, not Pauline's; +that I asked you to come and ask you to remain. I cannot allow you +to go simply because you do not chance to be a favourite with another +of my guests.' (Oh! the pang these words gave Polly's faulty, tender +little heart!) + +'I am only going because I feel so ill,--not a bit because of what +Polly said; I was in the wrong, too, perhaps, but I promise not to +let anybody nor anything make me quarrel when I visit you again. +Good-bye!' and Laura stepped into the wagon. + +'I trust you will not mention this to your mother, since I hope it is +the only unpleasant incident of your visit; and it is no fault of +mine that you go away with an unhappy impression of our hospitality.' +Here Mrs. Winship reached up and kissed little Anne, and as the +horses were restive, and no one seemed to have anything further to +say, Pancho drove off. + +'I don't care to talk with you any more at present, Polly,' said Mrs. +Winship. 'I am too hurt and too indignant to speak of your conduct +quietly. I know the struggles you have with your temper, and I am +quite willing to sympathise with you even when you do not come off +victorious; but this is something quite different. I can't conceive +how any amount of provocation or dislike could have led you into such +disloyalty to me'; and with this she walked away. + +Polly staggered into a little play-room tent of Dicky's, where she +knew that she could be alone, pinned the curtains together so that no +one could peep in, and threw herself down upon the long cushioned +seat where Dicky was wont to take his afternoon nap. There, in grief +and despair, she sobbed the afternoon through, dreading to be +disturbed and dreading to be questioned. + +'My beautiful birthday spoiled,' she moaned, 'and all my own fault! +I was so happy this morning, but now was ever anybody so miserable as +I? And even if I tell Aunt Truth what Laura said, she will think it +no excuse, and it isn't!' + +As it neared supper-time she made an opening in the back of the tent, +and after long watching caught sight of Gin on his way to the brook +for water, signalled him, and gave him this despairing little note +for Mrs. Winship:- + + +Dear Aunt Truth,--I don't ask you to forgive me--I don't deserve to +be forgiven--but I ask you to do me just one more of your dear little +kindnesses. Let me stay alone in Dicky's tent till morning, and +please don't let any one come near me. You can tell everybody the +whole story to-night, if you think best, though I should be glad if +only Dr. Paul and Bell need know; but I do not mind anything after +displeasing you--nothing can be so bad as that. Perhaps you think I +ought to come out and confess it to them myself, as a punishment; but +oh, Aunt Truth, I am punishing myself in here alone worse than any +one else can do it. I will go back to Santa Barbara any time that +you can send me to the stage station, and I will never ask you to +love me again until I have learned how to control my temper. Your +wretched, wretched + +POLLY. + +P.S.--I remember that it is my birthday, and all that you have done +for me, to-day and all the other days. It looks as if I were +ungrateful, but in spite of what I did I am not. The words just +blazed out, and I never knew that they were going to be said till I +heard them falling from my mouth. It seems to me that if I ever +atone for this I will have a slate and pencil hanging to my belt, and +only write what I have to say. POLLY. + + +The moisture came to Mrs. Winship's eyes as she read this tear- +stained little note. 'There's something here I don't quite +understand,' she thought; 'and yet Polly confessed that Laura told +the truth. Poor child!--but she has got to learn patience and self- +control through suffering. However, I'll keep the matter a secret +from everybody at present, and stand between her and my inquisitive +brood of youngsters,' and she slipped the note into her pocket. + +At six o'clock the members of the family came into camp from various +directions, and gathered about the supper-table. All were surprised +at Laura's sudden departure, but no one seemed especially grief- +stricken. Dicky announced confidentially to Philip that Laura was a +'norful 'fraid-cat of frogs,' and Jack ventured the opinion that Miss +Laura hadn't 'boy' enough in her for camp-life. + +'But where is Polly?' asked Bell, looking round the table, as she +pinned up her riding-skirt and sat down in her usual seat. + +'She has a bad headache, and is lying down,' said Mrs. Winship, +quietly; 'she'll be all right in the morning.' + +'Headache!' ejaculated four or five people at once, dropping their +napkins and looking at each other in dismay. + +'I'll go and rub her head with Cologne,' said Margery. + +'Let me go and sit with her,' said Elsie. + +'Have you been teasing her, Jack?' asked Mrs. Howard. + +'Too much birthday?' asked Dr. Paul. 'Tell her we can spare almost +anybody else better.' + +'Bless the child, she wants me if she is sick. Go on with your +suppers, I'll see to her,' and Bell rose from the table. + +'No, my dear, I want you all to leave her alone at present,' said +Mrs. Winship, decidedly. 'I've put her to bed in Dicky's play-tent, +and I want her to be quiet. Gin has taken her some supper, and she +needs rest.' + +Polly Oliver in need of rest! What an incomprehensible statement! +Nobody was satisfied, but there was nothing more to be said, though +Bell and Philip exchanged glances as much as to say, 'Something is +wrong.' + +Supper ended, and they gathered round the camp-fire, but nothing was +quite as usual. It was all very well to crack jokes, but where was a +certain merry laugh that was wont to ring out, at the smallest +provocation, in such an infectious way that everybody else followed +suit? And who was there, when Polly had the headache, to make a +saucy speech and look down into the fire innocently, while her +dimples did everything that was required in order to point the shaft? +And pray what was the use of singing when there was no alto to Bell's +treble, or of giving conundrums, since it was always Polly who +thought of nonsensical answers better than the real ones? And as for +Jack, why, it was folly to shoot arrows of wit into the air when +there was no target. He simply stretched himself out beside Elsie, +who was particularly quiet and snoozed peacefully, without taking any +part in the conversation, avowing his intention to 'turn in' early. +'Turn in' early, forsooth! What was the matter with the boy? + +'It's no use,' said Bell, plaintively; 'we can't be anything but +happy, now that we have Elsie here; but it needs only one small +headache to show that Polly fills a long-felt want in this camp. You +think of her as a modest spoke in the wheel till she disappears, and +then you find she was the hub.' + +'Yes,' said Margery, 'I think every one round this fire is simply +angelic, unless I except Jack; but the fact is that Polly is--well, +she is--Polly, and I dare any one to contradict me.' + +'The judgment of the court is confirmed,' said Philip. + + +'And the shark said, "If you +Don't believe it is true, +Just look at my wisdom tooth!"' + + +sang Geoffrey. + +'And if any one ever tells me again that she has red hair and hasn't +good features, I should just like to show them a picture of her as +she was to-day at the dinner-table!' exclaimed Bell. + +'As if anybody needed features with those dimples,' added Elsie, 'or +would mind red hair when it was such pretty hair!' + +'I think a report of this conversation would go far towards curing +Polly,' said Dr. Winship, with a smile. + +'And you say we can't go in there before we go to bed, mamacita?' +whispered Bell in her mother's ear, as the boys said good-night--and +went towards their tent. + +'My dear,' she answered decidedly, with a fond kiss for each of the +girls, 'Polly herself asked me to keep everybody away.' + +Polly herself wanted to be alone! Would wonders never cease? + +Meanwhile Dicky, who had disappeared for a moment, came back to the +fire, his bosom heaving with grief and rage. + +'I went to my play-tent,' he sobbed, 'and putted my hand underneath +the curtain and gave Polly a piece of my supper cake I saved for her- +-not the frosted part, but the burnt part I couldn't eat--and she +liked it and kissed my hand--and then I fought she was lonesome, and +would like to see my littlest frog, and I told her to put out her +hand again for a s'prise, and I squeezed him into it tight, so 't he +wouldn't jump--and she fought it was more cake, and when she found it +wasn't she frew my littlest frog clear away, and it got losted!' + +This brought a howl of mirth from everybody, and Dicky was +instructed, while being put to bed, not to squeeze little frogs into +people's hands in the dark, as it sometimes affected them +unpleasantly. + + +All this time Polly was lying in the tent, quite exhausted with +crying, and made more wretched by every sound of voices wafted +towards her. Presently Gin appeared with her night-wrapper and +various things for comfort sent her by the girls; and as she wearily +undressed herself and prepared for the night, she found three little +messages of comfort pinned on the neck and sleeves of her flannel +gown, written in such colossal letters that she could easily read +them by the moonlight. + +On the right sleeve:- + + +Cheer up! 'I will never desert Mr. Micawber!' BELL + + +On the left sleeve:- + + +Darling Polly,--Get well soon, or we shall all be sick in order to +stay with you. Lovingly, MEG. + +PS.--Jack said you were the LIFE OF THE CAMP! What do you think of +that?? M. + + +On the neck:- + + +Dearest,--You have always called me the Fairy Godmother, and +pretended I could see things that other people couldn't. + +The boys (great stupids!) think you have the headache. We girls can +all see that you are in trouble, but only the Fairy Godmother KNOWS +WHY; and though she can't make a beautiful gold coach out of this +pumpkin, because there's something wrong about the pumpkin, yet she +will do her best for Cinderella, and pull her out of the ashes +somehow. + +ELSIE. + + +Polly's tears fell fast on the dear little notes, which she kissed +again and again, and tucked under her pillow to bring her sleep. +'Elsie knows something,' she thought, 'but how? she knows that I'm in +trouble and that I've done wrong, or she wouldn't have said that +about not being able to turn a bad pumpkin into a beautiful gold +coach; but perhaps she can get Aunt Truth to forgive me and try me +again. Unless she can do it, it will never come to pass, for I +haven't the courage to ask her. I would rather run away early in the +morning and go home than have her look at me again as she did to-day. +Oh! what shall I do?' and Polly went down on her knees beside the +rough couch, and sobbed her heart out in a childish prayer for help +and comfort. It was just the prayer of a little child telling a +sorrowful story; because it is when we are alone and in trouble that +the unknown and mysterious God seems to us most like a Father, and we +throw ourselves into the arms of His love like helpless children, and +tell Him our secret thoughts and griefs. + +'Dear Father in heaven,' she sobbed, 'don't forgive me if I ought not +to be forgiven, but please make Aunt Truth feel how sorry I am, and +show me whether I ought to tell what made me so angry, though it's no +excuse. Bless and keep my darling patient little mother, and help me +to grow more like her, and braver and stronger too, so that I can +take care of her soon, and she needn't work hard any longer. Please +forgive me for hating some things in my life as much as I do, and I +will try and like them better; but I think--yes, I know--that I am +full of wicked pride; and oh, it seems as if I could never, never get +over wanting to live in a pretty house, and wear pretty dresses, and +have my mother live like Bell's and Margery's. And oh, if Thou canst +only forgive me for hating boarders so dreadfully, and being ashamed +of them every minute, I will try and like them better and tell +everybody that we take them--I will indeed; and if I can only once +make Aunt Truth love and trust me again, I will make the boarders' +beds and dust their rooms for ever without grumbling. Please, dear +Father in heaven, remember that I haven't any father to love me or to +teach me to be good; and though mamma does her best, please help her +to make something out of me if it can be done. Amen.' + +'Truth,' said Mrs. Howard, when all was quiet about the camp, 'Elsie +wants to see you a moment before she goes to sleep. Will you go to +her tent, while I play a game of cribbage with Dr. Paul?' + +Elsie looked like a blossom in all the beautiful greenness of her +tent, with her yellow head coming out from above the greens and +browns of the cretonne bed-cover for all the world like a daffodil +pushing its way up through the mould towards the spring sunshine. + +'Aunt Truth,' she said softly, as Mrs. Winship sat down beside her, +'you remember that Dr. Paul hung my hammock in a new place to-day, +just behind the girls' sleeping-tent. Now I know that Polly is in +trouble, and that you are displeased with her. What I want to ask, +if I may, is, how much you know; for I overheard a great deal myself- +-enough to feel that Polly deserves a hearing.' + +'I overheard nothing,' replied Mrs. Winship. 'All that I know Polly +herself confessed in Laura's presence. Polly told Laura, just as she +was going away, that everybody would be glad to see the last of her, +and that she had made everybody miserable from the beginning of her +visit. It was quite inexcusable, you know, dear, for one of my +guests to waylay another, just as she was leaving, and make such a +cruel speech. I would rather anything else had happened. I know how +impetuous Polly is, and I can forgive the child almost anything, her +heart is so full of love and generosity; but I cannot overlook such a +breach of propriety as that. Of course I have seen that Laura is not +a favourite with any of you. I confess she is not a very lovable +person, and I think she has led a very unwholesome life lately and is +sadly spoiled by it; still that is no excuse for Polly's conduct.' + +'No, of course it isn't,' sighed Elsie, with a little quiver of the +lip. 'I thought I could plead a better case for Polly, but I see +exactly how thoughtless and impolite she was; yet, if you knew +everything, auntie, dear, you would feel a little different. Do you +think it was nice of Laura to repeat what Polly said right before +her, and just as she was going away, when she knew it would make you +uncomfortable and that you were not to blame for it?' + +'No, hardly. It didn't show much tact; but girls of fifteen or +sixteen are not always remarkable for social tact. I excused her +partly because she was half-sick and nervous.' + +'Well,' Elsie went on, 'I didn't hear the whole quarrel, so that I do +not know how long it lasted nor who began it. I can't help thinking +it was Laura, though, for she's been trying her best to provoke Polly +for the last fortnight, and until to-day she has never really +succeeded. I was half asleep, and heard at first only the faint +murmur of voices, but when I was fully awake, Laura was telling Polly +that she doted on you simply because you had money and position, +while she had not; that you were all so partial to her that she had +lost sight of her own deficiencies. Then she called her bold and +affected, and I don't know what else, and finally wound up by saying +that nobody but the Winships would be likely to make a pet of the +daughter of a boarding-house keeper.' + +'Elsie!' ejaculated Mrs. Winship; 'this grows worse and worse! Is it +possible that Laura Burton could be guilty of such a thought?' + +'I can't be mistaken. I was too excited not to hear very clearly; +and the moment the words were spoken I knew my poor dear's fiery +temper would never endure that. And it didn't; it blazed out in a +second, but it didn't last long, for before I could get to the tent +she had stopped herself right in the middle of a sentence; and in +another minute I heard your voice, and crept back to the hammock, +thinking that everything would be settled by Laura's going away. I'd +no idea that she would pounce on Polly and get her in disgrace, the +very last thing, when she knew that she was responsible for the whole +matter. You see, auntie, that, impolite as Polly was, she only told +Laura that we girls were glad she was going. She didn't bring you +in, after all; and Laura knew perfectly well that she was a welcome +visitor, and we all treated her with the greatest politeness, though +it's no use to say we liked her much.' + +'I am very sorry for the whole affair,' sighed Mrs. Winship, 'there +is so much wrong on both sides. Laura's remark, it is true, would +have angered almost anybody who was not old and wise enough to see +that it deserved only contempt; but both the girls should have had +too much respect for themselves and for me to descend to such an +unladylike quarrel. However, I am only too glad to hear anything +which makes Polly's fault less, for I love her too dearly not to +suffer when I have to be severe with her.' + +'She wouldn't ask you to overlook her fault,' continued Elsie, with +tears in her eyes. 'I know just how wretched and penitent she must +be--Polly is always so fierce against her own faults--but what must +be making her suffer most is the thought that she has entirely lost +your confidence and good opinion. Oh, I can't help thinking that God +feels sorrier this very minute for Polly, who fights and fights +against her temper, like a dear sunbeam trying to shine again and +again when a cloud keeps covering it up, than He does for Laura, who +has everything made smooth for her, and who is unhappy when her +feathers are ruffled the least bit.' + +'You are right, dear, in so far that a fiery little soul like Polly's +can, if it finds the right channels, do God's work in the world +better than a character like Laura's, which is not courageous, nor +strong, nor sweet enough for great service, unless it grows into +better things through bitter or rich experiences. Now, good-night, +my blessed little peacemaker; sleep sweetly, for I am going into +Polly's tent to have a good talk with her.' + +As Mrs. Winship dropped the curtains of Elsie's tent behind her, and +made her way quietly through the trees, the tinkling sound of a banjo +fell upon the still night air; and presently, as she neared Polly's +retreat, this facetious serenade, sung by Jack's well-known voice, +was wafted to her ears: + + +'Prithee, Polly Oliver, why bide ye so still? +Pretty Polly Oliver, we fear you are ill. +I'm singing 'neath thy window, when night dews are chill, +For, pretty Polly Oliver, we hear you are ill.' + + +She was about to despatch Master Jack to his tent with a round +scolding, when the last words of the song were frozen on his lips by +the sound of a smothered sob, in place of the saucy retort he hoped +to provoke. The unexpected sob frightened him more than any fusilade +of hot words, and he stole away in the darkness more crestfallen than +he had been for many a year. + +Mrs. Winship, more troubled than ever, pulled apart the canvas +curtains, and stood in the opening, silently. The sight of the +forlorn little figure, huddled together on the straw bed, touched her +heart, and, when Polly started up with an eloquent cry and flew into +her extended arms, she granted willing forgiveness, and the history +of the afternoon was sobbed out upon her motherly shoulder. + +The next morning Mrs. Winship announced that Polly was better, sent +breakfast to her tent, and by skilful generalship drove everybody +away from the camp but Elsie, who brought Polly to the sitting-room, +made her comfortable on the lounge, and, administering much good +advice to Margery and Bell concerning topics to be avoided, admitted +them one by one into her presence, so that she gradually regained her +self-control. And at the dinner-table a very pale Polly was present +again, with such a white face and heavy eyes that no one could doubt +there had been a headache, while two people, at least, knew that +there had been a heartache as well. The next day's mail carried the +following letter to Laura Burton: + + +CAMP CHAPARRAL, August 16, 188-. + +My dear Laura,--As I told you when you were leaving, I cannot well +say how sorry I am that anything should have occurred to mar your +pleasant remembrance of your stay with us. That your dear mother's +daughter should have been treated with discourtesy while she was my +guest was very disagreeable to me; but I have learned that you were +yourself somewhat to blame in the affair, and therefore you should +have borne the harsh treatment you received with considerable +patience, and perhaps have kept it quite to yourself. ('That little +cat told her, after all,' said Laura, when she read this. 'I didn't +think she was that kind.') Polly would never have confessed the +cause of the quarrel, because she knew nothing could justify her +language; but Elsie was lying in the hammock behind the tent and +overheard the remark which so roused Polly's anger. You were not +aware, of course, how sore a spot you touched upon, or you could +never have spoken as you did, though I well know that you were both +too angry to reflect. Polly is a peculiarly proud and high-spirited +girl--proud, I confess, to a fault; but she comes, on her mother's +side, from a long line of people who have had much to be proud of in +the way of unblemished honesty, nobility, fine attainments, and +splendid achievements. Of her father's honourable services to his +country, and his sad and untimely death, you may have heard; but you +may not know that Mrs. Oliver's misfortunes have been very many and +very bitter, and that the only possibility of supporting and +educating Polly lies at present in her taking boarders, for her +health will not admit just now of her living anywhere save in +Southern California. I fail to see why this is not thoroughly +praiseworthy and respectable; but if you do not consider it quite an +elegant occupation, I can only say that Mrs. Oliver presides over the +table at which her 'boarders' sit with a high-bred dignity and grace +of manner that the highest lady in the land might imitate; and that, +when health and circumstances permit her to diminish the distance +between herself and the great world, she and her daughter Polly, by +reason of their birth and their culture, will find doors swinging +wide to admit them where you and I would find it difficult to enter. +Polly apologises sincerely for her rudeness, and will write you to +that effect, as of course she does not know of this letter. + +Sincerely your friend, + +TRUTH WINSHIP. + + + +CHAPTER IX: ROUND THE CAMP-FIRE + + + +'The time before the fire they sat, +And shortened the delay by pleasing chat.' + + +The August days had slipped away one after another, and September was +at hand. There was no perceptible change of weather to mark the +advent of the new month. The hills were a little browner, the dust a +little deeper, the fleas a little nimbler, and the water in the brook +a trifle lower, but otherwise Dame Nature did not concern herself +with the change of seasons, inasmuch as she had no old dresses to get +rid of, and no new ones to put on for a long time yet; indeed, she is +never very fashionable in this locality, and wears very much the same +garments throughout the year. + +Elsie seemed almost as strong as any of the other girls now, and +could enter with zest into all their amusements. The appetite of a +young bear, the sound, dreamless sleep of a baby, and the constant +breathing in of the pure, life-giving air had made her a new +creature. Mrs. Howard and Jack felt, day by day, that a burden of +dread was being lifted from their hearts; and Mrs. Howard especially +felt that she loved every rock and tree in the canyon. + +It was a charming morning, and Polly was seated at the dining-room +table, deep in the preparation of a lesson in reading and +pronunciation for Hop Yet. Her forehead was creased with many +wrinkles of thought, and she bit the end of her lead-pencil as if she +were engaged in solving some difficult problem; but, if that were so, +why did the dimples chase each other in and out of her cheeks in such +a suspicious fashion? She was a very gentle, a very sedate Polly, +these latter days, and not only astonished her friends, but surprised +herself, by her good behaviour, her elegant reserve of manner, her +patience with Jack, and her abject devotion to Dicky. + +'I'm afraid it won't last,' she sighed to herself occasionally. 'I'm +almost too good. That's always the way with me--I must either be so +bad that everybody is discouraged, or else so good that I frighten +them. Now I catch Bell and Elsie exchanging glances every day, as +much as to say, "Poor Polly, she will never hold out at this rate; do +you notice that nothing ruffles her--that she is simply angelic?" As +if I couldn't be angelic for a fortnight! Why I have often done it +for four weeks at a stretch!' + +Margery was in the habit of giving Hop Yet an English lesson every +other day, as he had been very loath to leave his evening school in +Santa Barbara and bury himself in a canyon, away from all educational +influences; but she had deserted her post for once and gone to ride +with Elsie, so that Polly had taken her place and was evolving an +exercise that Hop Yet would remember to the latest day of his life. +It looked simple enough:- + +1. The grass is dry. +2. The fruit is ripe. +3: The chaparral is green. +4. The new road is all right. +5. The bay-'rum' tree is fresh and pretty. + +But as no Chinaman can pronounce the letter 'r,' it was laboriously +rendered thus, when the unhappy time of the lesson came: + +1. The-glass-is-dly. +2. The-fluit-is-lipe. +3. The-chap-lal-is-gleen. +4. The-new-load-is-all-light-ee. +5. The bay-lum-tlee-is-flesh-and-plitty. + +Finally, when she attempted to introduce the sentence, 'Around the +rough and rugged rock the ragged rascal ran,' Hop Yet rose hurriedly, +remarking, 'All lightee; I go no more school jus' now. I lun get +lunchee.' + +Bell came running down the path just then, and linking her arm in +Polly's said, 'Papa has the nicest plan. You know the boys are so +disappointed that Colonel Jackson didn't ask them over to that rodeo +at his cattle ranch--though a summer rodeo is only to sort out fat +cattle to sell, and it is not very exciting; but papa promised to +tell them all about the old-fashioned kind some night, and he has +just remembered that to-morrow is Admission Day, September 9, so he +proposes a real celebration round the camp-fire to amuse Elsie. She +doesn't know anything about California even as it is now, and none of +us know what it was in the old days. Don't you think it will be +fun?' + +'Perfectly splendid!' + +'And papa wants us each to contribute something.' + +'A picnic!--but I don't know anything.' + +'That's just what I'm coming to. I have such a bright idea. He said +that we might look in any of his books, but Geoff and Jack are at +them already, and I'd like a surprise. Now Juan Capistrano, an old +vaquero of Colonel Jackson's, is over here. He is a wonderful rider; +papa says that he could ride on a comet, if he could get a chance to +mount. It was he who told the boys that the rodeo was over. Now I +propose that we go and interview Pancho and Juan, and get them to +tell us some old California stories. They are both as stupid as they +can be, but they must have had some adventures, I suppose, somewhere, +sometime. I'll translate and write the things down, for my part, and +you and Margery can tell them.' + +'Lovely! Oh, if we can only get an exciting grizzly story, so that + + +Every one's blood upon end it will stand, +And the hair run cold in their veins! + + +And was Dr. Paul out here when California was admitted into the +Union--1850, wasn't it?' + +'Of course; why, my child, he was one of the delegates called by +General Riley, the military governor, to meet in convention at +Monterey and make a State constitution. That was September, too--the +first day of September 1849. He went back to the East some time +afterwards, and stayed ten or fifteen years; but he was a real +pioneer and "forty-niner" all the same. + +The next night, September 9th, was so cool that the camp-fire was +more than ordinarily delightful; accordingly they piled on more wood +than usual, and prepared for a grand blaze. It was always built +directly in front of the sitting-room tent, so that Mrs. Howard and +Mrs. Winship could sit there if they liked; but the young people +preferred to lie lazily on their cushions and saddles under the oak- +tree, a little distance from the blaze. The clear, red firelight +danced and flickered, and the sparks rose into the sombre darkness +fantastically, while the ruddy glow made the great oak an enchanted +palace, into whose hollow dome they never tired of gazing. When the +light streamed highest, the bronze green of the foliage was turned +into crimson, and, as it died now and then, the stars winked brightly +through the thousand tiny windows formed by the interlacing branches. + +'Well,' said the doctor, bringing his Chinese lounging-chair into the +circle, and lighting his pipe so as to be thoroughly happy and +comfortable, 'will you banish distinctions of age and allow me to sit +among you this evening?' + +'Certainly,' Margery said; 'that's the very point of the celebration. +This is Admission Day, you know, and why shouldn't we admit you?' + +'True; and having put myself into a holiday humour by dining off +Pancho's dish of guisado (I suppose to-night of all nights we must +call beef and onion stew by its local name), I will proceed to +business, and we will talk about California. By the way, I shall +only conduct the exercises, for I feel rather embarrassed by the fact +that I've never killed, or been killed by, a bear, never been bitten +by a tarantula, poisoned by a rattlesnake, assaulted by a stage- +robber, nor anything of that sort. You have all read my story of +crossing the plains. I even did that in a comparatively easy and +unheroic fashion. I only wish, my dear girls and boys, that we had +with us some one of the brave and energetic men and women who made +that terrible journey at the risk of their lives. The history of the +California Crusaders, the thirty thousand or more emigrants who +crossed the plains in '48, more than equals the great military +expeditions of the Middle Ages, in magnitude, peril, and adventure. +Some went by way of Santa Fe and along the hills of the Gila; others, +starting from Red River, traversed the Great Stake Desert and went +from El Paso del Norte to Sonora; others went through Mexico, and, +after spending over a hundred days at sea, ran into San Diego and +gave up their vessels; others landed exhausted with their seven +months' passage round the Horn; and some reached the spot on foot +after walking the whole length of the California peninsula.' + +'What privations they must have suffered!' said Mrs. Howard. 'I +never quite realised it.' + +'Why, the amount of suffering that was endured in those mountain +passes and deserts can never be told in words. Those who went by the +Great Desert west of the Colorado found a stretch of burning salt +plains, of shifting hills of sand, with bones of animals and men +scattered along the trails; of terrible and ghastly odours rising in +the hot air from the bodies of hundreds of mules, and human creatures +too, that lay half-buried in the glaring white sand. A terrible +journey indeed; but if any State in the Union could be fair enough, +fertile enough, and rich enough to repay such a lavish expenditure of +energy and suffering, California certainly was and is the one. Now +who can tell us something of the name "California"? You, Geoffrey?' + +'Geoffrey has crammed!' exclaimed Bell, maliciously. 'I believe he's +been reading up all day and told papa what question to ask him!' + +'I'll pass it on to you if you like,' laughed Geoffrey. + +'No--you'd never get another that you could answer! Go on!' + +'In 1534, one Hernando de Grijalva was sent by Hernando Cortez to +discover something or other, and it was probably he who then saw the +peninsula of California; but a quarter of a century before this a +romance called Esplandian had appeared in Spain, narrating the +adventures of an Amazonian queen who brought allies from "the right +hand of the Indies" to assist the infidels in their attack upon +Constantinople--by the way I forgot to say that she was a pagan. +This queen of the Amazons was called Calafia, and her kingdom, rich +in gold and precious stones, was named California. The writer of the +romance derived this name, perhaps, from Calif, a successor of +Mohammed. He says: "Know that on the right hand of the Indies there +is an island named California, very close to the Terrestial Paradise, +and it was peopled by black women without any man among them, for +they lived in the fashion of the Amazonia. They were of strong and +hardy bodies, of ardent courage, and of great force. Their island +was the strongest in all the world, with its steep cliffs and rocky +shore. Their arms were all of gold, and so was the harness of the +wild beasts which they tamed and rode. For in the whole island there +was no metal but gold. They lived in caves wrought out of the rocks +with much labour, and they had many ships with which they sailed out +to other countries to obtain booty." Cortez and Grijalva believed +that they were near the coast of Asia, for they had no conception of +the size of the world nor of the vastness of the Pacific Ocean; and +as the newly-discovered land corresponded with the country described +in the romance, they named the peninsula California.' + +'My book,' said Philip, 'declared that the derivation of the name was +very uncertain, and that it was first bestowed on one of the coast +bays by Bernal Diaz.' + +'Now, Philip!' exclaimed Margery, 'do you suppose we are going to +believe that, after Geoff's lovely story?' + +'Certainly not; I only thought I'd permit you to hear both sides. I +knew of course that you would believe the prettier story of the two-- +girls always do!' + +'That isn't a "pretty story"--your remark, I mean, so we won't +believe it; will we, girls?' asked Bell. + +'Now, Polly, your eyes sparkle as if you couldn't wait another +minute; your turn next,' said Dr. Winship. + +'I am only afraid that I can't remember my contribution, which is +really Bell's and still more really Pancho's, for he told it to us, +and Bell translated it and made it into a story. We call it +"Valerio; or, The Mysterious Mountain Cave."' + +'Begins well!' exclaimed Jack. + +'Now, Jack, you must be nice. Remember this is Bell's story, and she +is letting me tell it so that I can bear my share in the +entertainment.' + +'Pancho believes every word of it,' added Bell, 'and says that his +father told it to him; but as I had to change it from bad Spanish +into good English, I don't know whether I've caught the idea +exactly.' + +'Oh, it will do quite nicely, I've no doubt,' said Jack, +encouragingly. 'We've often heard you do good English into bad +Spanish, and turn and turn about is only fair play. Don't mind me, +Polly; I will be gentle!' + +'Jack, if you don't behave yourself I'll send you to bed,' said +Elsie; and he ducked his head obediently into her lap, as Polly, with +her hands clasping her knees, and with the firelight dancing over her +bright face, leaned forward and told the Legend of + + +VALERIO; OR, THE MYSTERIOUS MOUNTAIN CAVE. + +'A long time ago, before the settlement of Santa Barbara by the +whites, the Mission padres had a great many Indians under their +control, who were known as peons, or serfs. They were given enough +to eat, were not molested by the outside Indians, and were entirely +peaceable. There were so few mountain passes by which to enter Santa +Barbara that they were easily held, and of course the padres were +anxious to keep their Indians from running away, lest they should +show the wilder tribes the way to get in and commit depredations. +These peaceable Indians paid tribute to intermediary tribes to hold +the passes and do their fighting. Those about the Mission gave corn +and cereals and hides and the products of the sea, and got in +exchange pinones (pine nuts). One of these Indians, named Valerio, +was a strong, brave, handsome youth, whose haughty spirit revolted at +his servitude, and, after seeking an opportunity for many weeks he +finally escaped to the Santa Ynez mountains, where he found a cave in +which he hid himself, drawing himself up by a rope and taking it in +after him. The Indians had unlimited belief in Valerio's mysterious +and wonderful powers. Pancho says that he could make himself +invisible at will, that locks and keys were powerless against him; +and that no one could hinder his taking money, horses, or food. All +sorts of things disappeared mysteriously by day and by night, and the +robberies were one and all laid to the door of Valerio. But after a +while Valerio grew lonely in his mountain retreat. He longed for +human companionship, and at length, becoming desperate, he descended +on the Mission settlement and kidnapped a young Indian boy named +Chito, took him to his cave, and admitted him into his wild and +lawless life. But Chito was not contented. He liked home and +comfortable slavery better than the new, strange life; so he seized +the first opportunity, and being a bright, daring little lad, and +fleet of foot, he escaped and made his way to the Mission. Arriving +there he told wonderful stories of Valerio and his life; how his +marvellous white mare seemed to fly, rather than gallop, and leaped +from rock to rock like a chamois; and how they lived upon wheat- +bread, cheeses, wine, and other delicacies instead of the coarse fare +of the Indians. He told them the location of the cave and described +the way thither; so the Alcalde (he was the mayor or judge, you know, +Elsie), got out the troops with their muskets, and the padres +gathered the Mission Indians with their bows and arrows, and they all +started in pursuit of the outlaw. Among the troops were two +hechiceros (wizards or medicine-men), whose bowed shoulders and +grizzled beards showed them to be men of many years and much wisdom. +When asked to give their advice, they declared that Valerio could not +be killed by any ordinary weapons, but that special means must be +used to be of any avail against his supernatural powers. +Accordingly, one of the hechiceros broke off the head of his arrow, +cast a charm over it, and predicted that this would deal the fatal +blow. The party started out with Chito as a guide, and, after many +miles of wearisome travel up rugged mountain sides and over steep and +almost impassable mountain trails, they paused at the base of a +cliff, and saw, far up the height, the mouth of Valerio's cave, and, +what was more, Valerio himself sitting in the doorway fast asleep. +Alas! he had been drinking too heavily of his stolen wine, or he +would never have so exposed himself to the enemy. They fired a +volley at him. One shot only took effect, and even this would not +have been possible save that the spell was not upon him because of +his sleep; but the one shot woke him and, half rising, he staggered +and fell from the mouth of the cave to a ledge of rocks beneath. He +sprang to his feet in a second and ran like a deer towards a tree +where his white mare was fastened. They fired another volley, but, +though the shots flew in every direction, Valerio passed on unharmed; +but just as he was disappearing from view the hechicero raised his +bow and the headless arrow whizzed through space and pierced him +through the heart. They clambered up the cliffs with shouts of +triumph and surrounded him on every side, but poor Valerio had +surrendered to a more powerful enemy than they! Wonderful to relate, +he still breathed, though the wound should have been instantly fatal. +They lifted him from the ground and tied him on his snow-white mare, +his long hair reaching almost to the ground, his handsome face as +pale as death, the blood trickling from his wound; but the mysterious +power that he possessed seemed to keep him alive in spite of his +suffering. Finally one of the hechiceros decided that the spell lay +in the buckskin cord that he wore about his throat--a rough sort of +necklace hung with bears' claws and snake rattles--and that he never +would die until the magic cord was cut. This, after some +consultation, was done. Valerio drew his last breath as it parted +asunder, and they bore his dead body home in triumph to the Mission. + +'But he is not forgotten. Stories are still told of his wonderful +deeds, and people still go in search of money that he is supposed to +have hidden in his cave. The Mexican women who tell suertes, or +fortunes, describe the location of the money; but, as soon as any one +reaches the cave, he is warned away by a little old man who stands in +the door and protects the buried treasure. An Indian lad, who was +riding over the hills one day with his horse and his dogs, dismounted +to search for his moccasin, when he suddenly noticed that the dogs +had chased something into a cave in the rocks. He followed, and, +peering into the darkness, saw two gleaming eyes. He thrust his +knife between them, but struck the air; and, though he had been +standing directly in front of the opening, so that nothing could have +passed him, yet he heard the clatter of hoofs and the tinkle of +spurs, and, turning, saw a mysterious horseman, whose pale face and +streaming hair melted into the mountain mist, as it floated down from +the purple Santa Ynez peaks into the lap of the vine-covered foot- +hills below.' + + + +CHAPTER X: MORE CAMP-FIRE STORIES + + + +'And still they watched the flickering of the blaze, +And talked together of the good old days.' + + +'Brava!' 'Bravissima!' 'Splendid, Polly!' exclaimed the boys. +'Bell, you're a great author!' + +'Couldn't have done better myself--give you my word!' cried Jack, +bowing profoundly to Bell and Polly in turn, and presenting them with +bouquets of faded leaves hastily gathered from the ground. + +'Polly covered herself with glory,' said the doctor; 'and I am very +proud of your part in it, too, my little daughter. I have some +knowledge of Pancho's capabilities as a narrator, and I think the +"Story of Valerio" owes a good deal to you. Now, who comes next? +Margery?' + +'No, please,' said Margery, 'for I have another story. Take one of +the boys, and let's have more facts.' + +'Yes, something historic and profound, out of the encyclopaedia, from +Jack,' said Polly, saucily. + +'Thanks, Miss Oliver. With you for an audience any man might be +inspired; but--' + +'But not a BOY?' + +'Mother, dear, remove that child from my sight, or I shall certainly +shake her! Phil, go on, just to keep Polly quiet.' + +'Very well. Being the oldest Californian present, I--' + +'What about Dr. Paul?' asked the irrepressible Polly. + +'He wasn't born here,' responded Philip, dryly, 'and I was.' + +'I think that's a quibble,' interrupted Bell. 'Papa was here twenty +years before you were.' + +'It's not my fault that he came first,' answered Philip. 'Margery +and I are not only the oldest Californians present, but the only +ones. Isn't that so, sir?' + +'Quite correct.' + +'Oh, if you mean that way, I suppose you are; but still papa helped +frame the Constitution, and was here on the first Admission Day, and +was one of the Vigilantes--and I think that makes him more of a real +Californian than you. You've just "grown up with the country."' + +'Bless my soul! What else could I do? I would have been glad to +frame the Constitution, admit the State, and serve on the Vigilance +Committee, if they had only waited for me; but they went straight +ahead with the business, and when I was born there was nothing to do +but stand round and criticise what they had done, or, as you express +it, "grow up with the country." Well, as I was saying when I was +interrupted--' + +'Beg pardon.' + +'Don't mention it. Uncle Doc has asked me to tell Mrs. Howard and +Elsie how they carried on the rodeos ten or fifteen years ago. Of +course I was only a little chap'--('VERY little,' murmured his +sister)--'but never too small to stick on a horse, and my father used +often to take me along. The rodeos nowadays are neither as great +occasions, nor as exciting ones, as they used to be; but this is the +way a rodeo is managed. When the spring rains are mostly over, and +the grass is fine,--say in April--the ranchero of a certain ranch +sends word to all his neighbours that he will hold a rodeo on a +certain day or days. Of course the cattle used to stray all over the +country, and get badly mixed, as there were no fences; so the rodeo +was held for the purpose of separating the cattle and branding the +calves that had never been marked. + +'The owners of the various ranches assemble the night before, +bringing their vaqueros with them. They start out very early in the +morning, having had a cup of coffee, and ride to the "rodeo-ground," +which is any flat, convenient place where canyons converge. Many of +the cattle on the hills round about know the place, having been there +before, and the vaqueros start after them and drive them to the +spot.' + +'How many vaqueros would there be?' asked Elsie. + +'Oh, nine or ten, perhaps; and often from one thousand to three +thousand cattle--it depends on the number of ranches and cattle +represented. Some of the vaqueros form a circle round the cattle +that they have driven to the rodeo-ground, and hold them there while +others go back to the ranch for breakfast and fresh horses.' + +'Fresh horses so soon?' said Mrs. Howard. 'I thought the mustangs +were tough, hardy little beasts, that would go all day without +dropping.' + +'Yes, so they are; but you always have to begin to "part out" the +cattle with the freshest and best-trained horses you have. The +owners and their best vaqueros now go into the immense band of +cattle, and try to get the cows and the unbranded calves separated +from the rest. You can imagine what skilful engineering this takes, +even though you never saw it. Two work together; they start a +certain cow and calf and work them through the band of cattle until +they near the outside, and then "rush" them to a place three or four +hundred yards beyond, where other vaqueros are stationed to receive +and hold them. Of course the cattle don't want to leave the band, +and of course they don't want to stay in the spot to which they are +driven.' + +'I don't blame them!' cried Bell impetuously. 'Probably the cows +remember the time when they were branded themselves, and they don't +want their dear little bossies put through the same operation.' + +'Very likely. Then more cows and calves are started in the same way; +the greatest difficulty being had with the first lot, for the cattle +always stay more contentedly together as the group grows larger. +Occasionally one "breaks" and runs off on the hills, and a vaquero +starts after him, throws the reata and lassos him, or "lass's" him, +as the California boys say.' + +'There must be frightful accidents,' said Mrs. Winship. + +'Yes; but not so many as you would suppose, for the horsemanship, in +its particular way, is something wonderful. When an ugly steer is +lassoed and he feels the reata or lariat round his neck, he sometimes +turns and "makes" for the horse, and unless the vaquero is +particularly skilful he will be gored and his horse too; but he gives +a dexterous turn to the lariat, the animal steps over it, gets +tangled and thrown. Frequently an animal breaks a horn or a leg. +Sometimes one fall is not enough; the steer jumps up and pursues the +horse. Then the vaquero keeps a little ahead of him and leads him +back to the rodeo-ground, where another vaquero lassos him by the +hind legs and throws him, while the reata is taken off his neck.' + +'There is another danger, too,' added Dr. Winship. 'The vaquero +winds the reata very tightly round the pommel of his saddle to hold +the steer, and he is likely to have his finger caught in the hair- +rope and cut off.' + +'Yes, I forgot that. Two or three of the famous old vaqueros about +Santa Barbara--Jose Maria, Jose Antonio, and old Clemente--have each +lost a finger. Well, the vaqueros at length form in a circle round +the band of selected cattle. The ranch owner who gives the rodeo +takes his own cattle that he has found--the ones bearing his brand, +you know--and drives them in with the ones to be branded, leaving in +the rodeo-ground the cattle bearing the brands of all the other +rancheros. There has been much drinking of aguardiente (brandy) and +everybody by this time is pretty reckless. Then they drive this +selected band to the home corral, the vaqueros yelling, the cattle +"calling," and the reatas whizzing and whistling through the air. If +any unfortunate tries to escape his fate he is pursued, "lass'd," and +brought back. By this time the cattle are pretty well heated and +angry, and when they get into the crowded corral they horn each other +and try to gore the horses. A fire is then built in one corner of +the corral and the branding-irons are heated.' + +'Oh! hold my hand, Polly, if the branding is going to begin, I hate +it so,' exclaimed Elsie. + +'I won't say much about it, but it's no worse than a thousand things +that people have to bear every year of their lives. Animals never +have to have teeth filled, for instance, nor limbs amputated--' + +'Oh, just think of a calf with a wooden leg, or a cow with false +teeth! Wouldn't it be funny?' laughed Bell. + +'They don't have a thousand ills that human flesh is heir to, so they +must be thankful they get off so easy. Well! the branding-irons are +heated, as I say--each cattle-owner having his special brand, which +is properly recorded, and which may be any device not previously +used. Two men now catch the calves; one lassoing them by the head, +the other by the legs. A third man takes the iron from the fire and +brands the chosen letter or hieroglyphic on the animal's hind +quarter.' + +'Sometimes on the fore quarter, don't they?' asked Bell. 'I've seen +brands there,--your horse has two, and our cow has one also.' + +'Yes, a brand on the fore quarter shows that the animal has been +sold, but it always has the original brand on the hind quarter. When +a sale is effected, the new brand is put anywhere in front of the +fifth rib, and this constitutes what they call a venta, or sale. If +you notice some of the little "plugs" ridden by Santa Barbara boys, +you'll see that they bear half a dozen brands. By the way, if the +rodeo has been a very large one, they are several days branding the +cattle, so they are turned out to pastorear a little while each day.' + +'The brand was absolute sign of ownership, you know, girls,' said Dr. +Winship; 'and though there was the greatest care exercised in +choosing and recording the brands, there was plenty of opportunity +for cheating. For instance, a man would often see unbranded cattle +when riding about, and there was nothing to prevent his dismounting, +building a fire, heating his iron, and putting his own brand on them. +Then, at the next rodeo, they were simply turned over to him, for, as +I say, the brand was absolute ownership.' + + +'Whene'er I take my rides abroad, + How many calves I see; +And, as I brand them properly, + They all belong to me,' + + +said Bell. + +'How I should like to see a rodeo!' sighed Elsie. 'I can't imagine +how the vaqueros can fling the reata while they are riding at full +speed.' + +'It isn't so very wonderful,' said Polly, nonchalantly 'the most +ordinary people can learn it; why! your brother Jack can lasso almost +as well as a Mexican.' + +'And I can "lass" any stationary object myself,' cried Bell; 'a +hitching-post, or even a door-knob; I can do it two or three times +out of ten.' + +'That shows immense skill,' answered Jack, 'but, as the thing you +want to "lass" never does stay still, and as it is absolutely +necessary to catch it more than three times out of ten, you probably +wouldn't make a name and fortune as a vaquero. Juan Capistrano, by +the way, used to be famous with the lariat. I had heard of his +adventure with a bull on the island of Santa Rosa, and I asked him +about it to-day; but he had so exhausted himself telling stories to +Bell that he had very few words for me. You see there was a bull, on +Santa Rosa island, so wild that they wanted to kill him; but nobody +could do it, though he was a terror to any one who ventured on the +island. They called him "Antiguelo," because of his long horns and +long tail. He was such a terrible fighter that all the vaqueros were +afraid to lass' him, for he always broke away with the lariat. You +see a horse throws a bull by skill and not by strength, of course. +You can choke almost any bull; but this one was too smart! he would +crouch on his haunches and pull back until the rope nearly choked him +and then suddenly "make" for the horse. Juan Capistrano had a +splendid horse--you see as much depends on the horse as the man in +such a case--and he came upon Antiguelo on the Cerro Negro and lass'd +him. Well, did he fight? I asked. "Si, Senor." Well, what +happened? "Yo lo mate" (I killed him), he said, with a shrug of his +shoulders, and that's all I could get out of Juan regarding his +adventure.' + +'But you haven't done your share, you lazy boy,' objected Bell. 'You +must tell us more.' + +'What do you want to hear? I am up on all the animal and vegetable +life of Southern California, full of interesting information +concerning its old customs, can give you Spanish names for all the +things that come up in ordinary conversation, and am the only man +present who can make a raw-hide reata,' said Jack, modestly. + +'Go on and tell us how, O great and wise reatero,' said Bell. + +'I'll tell you that myself,' said Elsie, 'for I've seen him do it +dozens of times, when he should have been studying his little +lessons. He takes a big piece of raw hide, cuts a circle right out +of the middle, and then cuts round and round this until he has one +long continuous string, half an inch wide. He then stretches it and +scrapes the hair off with a knife or a piece of glass, gets it into +four strands, and braids it "round."' + +'Perhaps you think braiding "round" is easy to do,' retorted Jack, in +an injured tone; 'but I know it took me six months to learn to do it +well.' + +'I fail to see,' said his mother, 'how a knowledge of "braiding +round" and lassoing of wild cattle is going to serve you in your +university life and future career.' + +'Oh yes, it will. I shall be the Buffalo Bill of Harvard, and I +shall give charming little entertainments in my rooms, or in some +little garden-plot suitable to the purpose.' + +'Shall you make a point of keeping up with your class?' asked Mrs. +Winship. + +'Oh yes, unless they go too fast. My sports won't take any more time +than rowing or baseball. They'll be a little more expensive, because +I'll have to keep some wild cattle constantly on hand, and perhaps a +vaquero or two; but a vaquero won't cost any more than a valet.' + +'I didn't intend furnishing you with a valet,' remarked his mother. + +'But I shall be self-supporting, mother dear. I shall give +exhibitions on the campus, and the gate-money will keep me in +luxury.' + +'This is all very interesting,' said Polly, cuttingly; 'but what has +it to do with California, I'd like to know?' + +'Poor dear! Your brain is so weak. Can't you see that when I am the +fashion in Cambridge, it will be noised about that I gained my +marvellous skill in California? This will increase emigration. I +don't pretend to say it will swell the population like the discovery +of gold in '48, but it will have a perceptible effect.' + +'You are more modest than a whole mossy bank of violets,' laughed Dr. +Paul. 'Now, Margery, will you give us your legend?' + +'Mine is the story of Juan de Dios (literally, Juan of God), and I'm +sorry to say that it has a horse in it, like Polly's; only hers was a +snow-white mare, and mine is a coal-black charger. But they wouldn't +tell us any romantic love-stories; they were all about horses.' + + +STORY OF JUAN DE DIOS. + +'In early days, when Americans were coming in to Santa Barbara, there +were many cattle-buyers among them; and there were large bands of +robbers all over the country who were ready to pounce on these +travellers on their way to the great cattle ranchos, kill them, and +steal their money and clothes, as well as their horses and trappings. +No one could understand how the robbers got such accurate information +of the movements of the travellers, unless they had a spy somewhere +near the Mission, where they often stopped for rest and refreshment. + +'Now, there was a certain young Indian vaquero in the employ of the +padres at La Mission de la Purisima. He was a wonderful horseman, +and greatly looked up to by his brother vaqueros, because he was so +strong, alert, and handsome, and because he was always dressed +elegantly in rich old Spanish embroideries and velvets, given to him, +he said, by men for whom he had done great services. + +'One day a certain traveller, a Spanish official of high degree, came +from Monterey to wed his sweetheart, the daughter of the richest +cattle-owner in all the country round. His spurs and bit and bridle +were of solid silver; his jaquima (halter) was made of a hair rope +whose strands had been dyed in brilliant colours; his tapaderos +(front of the stirrups), mochilas (large leather saddle flaps), and +sudaderos (thin bits of leather to protect the legs from sweat), were +all beautifully stamped in the fashion used by the Mexicans; his +saddle blankets and his housings were all superb, and he wore a broad +sombrero encircled with a silver snake and trimmed with silver lace. + +'The traveller stayed at La Purisima all night, and set out early in +the morning to ride the last forty miles that separated him from his +bride. But Juan and two other robbers were lying in wait for him +behind a great rock that stood at the entrance of a lonely canyon. +They appeared on horseback, one behind the unfortunate man and two in +front, so that he could escape neither way. They finally succeeded +in lassoing the horse and throwing him to the ground with his rider, +who defended himself bravely with his knife, but was finally killed +and robbed, Juan taking his clothes and trappings, and the other two +dividing the contents of his purse. They could not have buried their +victim as successfully as usual, or else they were surprised, and had +to escape, for the body was found; and Juan, whom the padres had +begun to view with suspicion, was nowhere to be found about the +Mission. Troops were sent out in pursuit of him, for this particular +traveller was a high official, and it was necessary that his death +should be avenged. They at last heard that Juan had been seen going +towards Santa Ynez Mission, and, pursuing him thither, they came upon +him as he was driving a band of horses into a corral, and just in the +act of catching his own horse, a noble and powerful animal, called +Azabache, because of his jet-black colour. The men surrounded the +corral, and ordered him to surrender. He begged them to wait until +he had saddled Azabache, and then they might shoot them both down +together. He asked permission to call three times (pegar tres +gritos), and after the third call they were to shoot. His last wish +was granted. He saddled and mounted his splendid horse, called once- +-twice--thrice,--but when the last shout faded in the air, and the +troops raised their muskets to fire, behold, there was no Juan de +Dios to be seen. They had been surrounding the corral so that no one +could have ridden out; they looked among the horses, but Asabache was +nowhere to be found. + +'Just then a joyous shout was heard, so ringing and triumphant that +every man turned in the direction from which it came. There, +galloping up the hillside, nearly half a mile distant, was Juan de +Dios, mounted on his coal-black Azabache! But it was no common +sunshine that deepened the gorgeous colours of his trappings and +danced upon his silver spurs till they glistened like two great +stars! It was a broad, glittering stream of light such as no mortal +had ever seen before and which almost blinded the eyes; and over this +radiant path of golden sunbeams galloped Juan de Dios, until he +disappeared over the crest of the mountain. Then the light faded; +the padres crossed themselves in silence and went home to their +Mission! and Juan de Dios never was heard of more.' + +Modest little Margery was hailed with such cheers that you could not +have seen her cheeks for the blushes; and, just as the party began to +think of forsaking the fascinating camp-fire for bed, Bell jumped up +impetuously and cried, 'Here, Philip, give me the castanets, please. +Polly and Jack, you play "Las Palomas" for me, and I'll sing and show +you the dance of that pretty Mexican girl whom I saw at the ball +given under the Big Grape Vine. Wait till I take off my hair ribbon. +Lend me your scarf, mamma. Now begin!' + + +LAS PALOMAS. {2} +(THE DOVES.) +Cua-tro pa-lo-mi-tas blan-cas que vie- +nen de por a--lla. U-nas a las o-tras +di-cen no hay a-mor como el de a-ca. + + +It is barely possible, but not likely, that anything prettier than +Bell's Mexican danza was to be seen under the light of the September +stars that night; although they were doubtless shining down upon a +thousand lovely things. With all the brightness of her loosened hair +rising and falling with the motion of her swaying figure--with her +twinkling feet, her crimson cheeks and parted lips, she looked the +very spirit of the dance, and her enraptured--audience only allowed +her to stop when she was absolutely breathless. + +'Oh what a beautiful evening!' exclaimed Elsie, when the celebration +was finally over. 'Was there ever such a dear, dear canyon with such +dear people in it! If it only wouldn't rain and we could live here +for ever!' + + +'Rain, rain, stay away! +Come again another day, +Little Elsie wants to play,' + + +recited Polly, and then everybody went to their straw beds. + + + +CHAPTER XI: BREAKING CAMP + + + +'The thirsty earth soaks up the rain, +And drinks and gapes for drink again; +The plants suck in the earth and are, +With constant drinking, fresh and fair.' + + +But it did rain; and it didn't wait until they were out of the canyon +either. It began long before the proper time, and it by no means +confined itself to a shower, but opened the winter season fully a +month before there was any need of it, and behaved altogether in a +most heartless and inconsiderate manner, like a very spoil-sport of a +rain. + +It began after dark, so as to be just as disagreeable as possible, +and under the too slight cover of their tents the campers could hear +the rush and the roar of it like the tramping of myriad feet on the +leaves. Pancho and the two Chinamen huddled under the broad +sycamores in their rubber blankets, and were dry and comfortable; but +all the waterproof tents leaked, save Elsie's. + +But when it was dawn, the Sun, having heard nothing apparently of any +projected change in the weather, rose at the usual time in the most +resplendent fashion--brighter, rosier, and more gloriously, if you +will believe me, than he had risen that whole long sunshiny summer! +And he really must have felt paid for getting up at such an unearthly +hour in the morning, when, after he had clambered over the grey +mountain peaks, he looked down upon Las Flores Canyon, bathed in the +light of his own golden beams. + +If he knew anything about Ancient History and Biblical Geography--and +if he didn't I don't know who should, inasmuch as he had been present +from the beginning of time--he must have thought it as fair as the +Garden of Eden; for Nature's face simply shone with cleanliness, like +that of a smiling child just fresh from its bath, and every leaf of +every tree glistened as he beamed upon it, and shook off its crystal +drops that he might turn them into diamonds. + +'It was only a shower,' said Dr. Winship, as he seated himself on a +damp board and partook of a moist breakfast, 'and with this sun the +tents will be dry before night; Elsie has caught no cold, the dust +will be laid, and we can stay another week with safety.' + +Everybody was hilarious over this decision save the men-of-all-work, +who longed unspeakably for a less poetic existence--Hop Yet +particularly, who thought camping out 'not muchee good.' + +Dicky was more pleased than anybody, perhaps, as every day in the +canyon was one day less in school; not that he had ever been to +school, but he knew in advance, instinctively, that it wouldn't suit +him. Accordingly, he sought the wettest possible places and played +all day with superhuman energy. He finally found Hop Yet's box of +blueing under a tree, in a very moist and attractive state of +fluidity, and just before dinner improved the last shining hour by +painting himself a brilliant hue and appearing at dinner in such a +fiendish guise that he frightened the family into fits. + +Now Dr. Winship was one of the most weather-wise men in California, +and his predictions were always quite safe and sensible; but somehow +or other it did rain again in two or three days, and it poured harder +than ever, too. To be sure, it cleared promptly, but the doctor was +afraid to trust so fickle a person as the Clerk of the Weather had +become, and marching orders were issued. + +The boys tramped over all their favourite bits of country, and the +girls visited all their best beloved haunts, every one of them dear +from a thousand charming associations. They looked for the last time +in Mirror Pool, and saw the reflection of their faces--rather grave +faces just then, over the leave-taking. + +The water-mirror might have been glad to keep the picture for ever on +its surface--Margery with her sleek braids and serene forehead; with +Polly, saucy nose and mischievous eyes, laughing at you like a merry +water-sprite; Bell, with her brilliant cheeks glowing like two roses +just fallen in the brook; and Gold Elsie, who, if you had put a frame +of green leaves about her delicate face and yellow locks, would have +looked up at you like a water-lily. + +They wafted a farewell to Pico Negro, and having got rid of the boys, +privately embraced a certain Whispering Tree under whose singing +branches they had been wont to lie and listen to all the murmuring +that went on in the forest. + +Then they clambered into the great thorough-brace wagon, where they +all sat in gloomy silence for ten minutes, while Dicky's tan terrier +was found for the fourth time that morning; and the long train, with +its baggage-carts, its saddle-horses and its dogged little pack- +mules, moved down the rocky steeps that led to civilisation. The +gate that shut them in from the county road and the outer world was +opened for the last time, and shut with a clang, and it was all over- +-their summer in a canyon! + + + +Footnotes: + + + +{1} Foot-notes by a rival of the Countess. + +{1a} Is that spelled right? +{1b} Fifty miles an hour, Jack says. +{1c} Poetic licence. +{1d} Gone back to cold cream. +{1e} And pie. +{1f} For sale at all bookstores, ten cents a copy. + +{2} 'Four little white doves began to coo, + To coo to their mates so fair; +And each to the other dove said, 'Your coo + With mine cannot compare!' + + + + + +End of The Project Gutenberg Etext of A Summer in a Canyon +by Kate Douglas Wiggin + |