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+The Project Gutenberg eBook, An Edinburgh Eleven, by J. M. Barrie
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+
+
+
+Title: An Edinburgh Eleven
+       Pencil Portraits from College Life
+
+
+Author: J. M. Barrie
+
+
+
+Release Date: March 19, 2012  [eBook #39203]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII)
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK AN EDINBURGH ELEVEN***
+
+
+E-text prepared by David Edwards, Diane Monico, and the Online Distributed
+Proofreading Team (http://www.pgdp.net) from page images generously made
+available by Internet Archive (http://www.archive.org)
+
+
+
+Note: Images of the original pages are available through
+      Internet Archive. See
+      http://www.archive.org/details/edinburghelevenp00barrrich
+
+
+
+
+
+AN EDINBURGH ELEVEN
+
+Pencil Portraits from College Life
+
+by
+
+J. M. BARRIE
+
+Author of
+"The Little Minister," "A Window in Thrums," "When a Man's
+Single," "Auld Licht Idylls," etc.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+New York
+Lovell, Coryell & Company
+5 And 7 East Sixteenth Street
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+                                       PAGE
+
+      I. LORD ROSEBERY,                   7
+
+     II. PROFESSOR MASSON,               19
+
+    III. PROFESSOR BLACKIE,              31
+
+     IV. PROFESSOR CALDERWOOD,           41
+
+      V. PROFESSOR TAIT,                 53
+
+     VI. PROFESSOR FRASER,               67
+
+    VII. PROFESSOR CHRYSTAL,             77
+
+   VIII. PROFESSOR SELLAR,               91
+
+     IX. MR. JOSEPH THOMSON,            105
+
+      X. ROBERT LOUIS STEVENSON,        115
+
+     XI. REV. WALTER C. SMITH, D.D.,    129
+
+
+
+
+LORD ROSEBERY.
+
+
+
+
+I.
+
+LORD ROSEBERY.
+
+
+The first time I ever saw Lord Rosebery was in Edinburgh when I was a
+student, and I flung a clod of earth at him. He was a peer; those were
+my politics.
+
+I missed him, and I have heard a good many journalists say since then
+that he is a difficult man to hit. One who began by liking him and is
+now scornful, which is just the reverse process from mine, told me the
+reason why. He had some brochures to write on the Liberal leaders, and
+got on nicely till he reached Lord Rosebery, where he stuck. In vain he
+walked round his lordship, looking for an opening. The man was
+naturally indignant; he is the father of a family.
+
+Lord Rosebery is forty-one years of age, and has missed many
+opportunities of becoming the bosom friend of Lord Randolph Churchill.
+They were at Eton together and at Oxford, and have met since. As a boy,
+the Liberal played at horses, and the Tory at running off with other
+boys' caps. Lord Randolph was the more distinguished at the university.
+One day a proctor ran him down in the streets smoking in his cap and
+gown. The undergraduate remarked on the changeability of the weather,
+but the proctor, gasping at such bravado, demanded his name and
+college. Lord Randolph failed to turn up next day at St. Edmund Hall to
+be lectured, but strolled to the proctor's house about dinner-time.
+"Does a fellow, name of Moore, live here?" he asked. The footman
+contrived not to faint. "He do," he replied, severely; "but he are at
+dinner." "Ah! take him in my card," said the unabashed caller. The
+Merton books tell that for this the noble lord was fined ten pounds.
+
+There was a time when Lord Rosebery would have reformed the House of
+Lords to a site nearer Newmarket. As politics took a firmer grip of
+him, it was Newmarket that seemed a long way off. One day at Edinburgh
+he realized the disadvantage of owning swift horses. His brougham had
+met him at Waverley Station to take him to Dalmeny. Lord Rosebery
+opened the door of the carriage to put in some papers, and then turned
+away. The coachman, too well bred to look round, heard the door shut,
+and, thinking that his master was inside, set off at once. Pursuit was
+attempted, but what was there in Edinburgh streets to make up on those
+horses? The coachman drove seven miles, until he reached a point in the
+Dalmeny parks where it was his lordship's custom to alight and open a
+gate. Here the brougham stood for some minutes, awaiting Lord
+Rosebery's convenience. At last the coachman became uneasy and
+dismounted. His brain reeled when he saw an empty brougham. He could
+have sworn to seeing his lordship enter. There were his papers. What
+had happened? With a quaking hand the horses were turned, and, driving
+back, the coachman looked fearfully along the sides of the road. He met
+Lord Rosebery travelling in great good humor by the luggage omnibus.
+
+Whatever is to be Lord Rosebery's future, he has reached that stage in
+a statesman's career when his opponents cease to question his capacity.
+His speeches showed him long ago a man of brilliant parts. His tenure
+of the Foreign Office proved him heavy metal. Were the Gladstonians to
+return to power, the other Cabinet posts might go anywhere, but the
+Foreign Secretary is arranged for. Where his predecessors had clouded
+their meaning in words till it was as wrapped up as a Mussulman's head,
+Lord Rosebery's were the straightforward despatches of a man with his
+mind made up. German influence was spoken of; Count Herbert Bismarck
+had been seen shooting Lord Rosebery's partridges. This was the
+evidence: there has never been any other, except that German methods
+commended themselves to the minister rather than those of France. His
+relations with the French government were cordial. "The talk of
+Bismarck's shadow behind Rosebery," a great French politician said
+lately, "I put aside with a smile; but how about the Jews?" Probably
+few persons realize what a power the Jews are in Europe, and in Lord
+Rosebery's position he is a strong man if he holds his own with them.
+Any fears on that ground have, I should say, been laid by his record at
+the Foreign Office.
+
+Lord Rosebery had once a conversation with Prince Bismarck, to which,
+owing to some oversight, the Paris correspondent of the _Times_ was not
+invited. M. Blowitz only smiled good-naturedly, and of course his
+report of the proceedings appeared all the same. Some time afterward
+Lord Rosebery was introduced to this remarkable man, who, as is well
+known, carries Cabinet appointments in his pocket, and complimented him
+on his report. "Ah, it was all right, was it?" asked Blowitz, beaming.
+Lord Rosebery explained that any fault it had was that it was all
+wrong. "Then if Bismarck did not say that to you," said Blowitz,
+regally, "I know he intended to say it."
+
+The "Uncrowned King of Scotland" is a title that has been made for Lord
+Rosebery, whose country has had faith in him from the beginning. Mr.
+Gladstone is the only other man who can make so many Scotsmen take
+politics as if it were the Highland Fling. Once when Lord Rosebery was
+firing an Edinburgh audience to the delirium point, an old man in the
+hall shouted out, "I dinna hear a word he says, but it's grand, it's
+grand!" During the first Midlothian campaign Mr. Gladstone and Lord
+Rosebery were the father and son of the Scottish people. Lord Rosebery
+rode into fame on the top of that wave, and he has kept his place in
+the hearts of the people, and in oleographs on their walls, ever since.
+In all Scottish matters he has the enthusiasm of a Burns dinner, and
+his humor enables him to pay compliments. When he says agreeable things
+to Scotsmen about their country, there is a twinkle in his eye and in
+theirs to which English scribes cannot give a meaning. He has unveiled
+so many Burns statues that an American lecturess explains: "Curious
+thing, but I feel somehow I am connected with Lord Rosebery. I go to a
+place and deliver a lecture on Burns; they collect subscriptions for a
+statue, and he unveils it." Such is the delight of the Scottish
+students in Lord Rosebery that he may be said to have made the
+triumphal tour of the northern universities as their lord-rector; he
+lost the post in Glasgow lately through a quibble, but had the honor
+with the votes. His address to the Edinburgh undergraduates on
+"Patriotism" was the best thing he ever did outside politics, and made
+the students his for life. Some of them had smuggled into the hall a
+chair with "Gaelic chair" placarded on it, and the lord-rector
+unwittingly played into their hands. In a noble peroration he exhorted
+his hearers to high aims in life. "Raise your country," he exclaimed
+[cheers]; "raise yourselves [renewed cheering]; raise your university
+[thunders of applause]." From the back of the hall came a solemn voice,
+"Raise the chair!" Up went the Gaelic chair.
+
+Even Lord Rosebery's views on imperial federation can become a
+compliment to Scotland. Having been all over the world himself, and
+felt how he grew on his travels, Lord Rosebery maintains that every
+British statesman should visit India and the colonies. He said that
+first at a semi-public dinner in the country--and here I may mention
+that on such occasions he has begun his speeches less frequently than
+any other prominent politician with a statement that others could be
+got to discharge the duty better; in other words, he has several times
+omitted this introduction. On his return to London he was told that his
+colleagues in the Administration had been seeing how his scheme would
+work out. "We found that if your rule were enforced, the Cabinet would
+consist of yourself and Childers." "This would be an ideal cabinet,"
+Lord Rosebery subsequently remarked in Edinburgh, "for it would be
+entirely Scottish," Mr. Childers being member for a Scottish
+constituency.
+
+The present unhappy division of the Liberal party has made enemies of
+friends for no leading man so little as for Lord Rosebery. There are
+forces working against him, no doubt, in comparatively high places, but
+the Unionists have kept their respect for him. His views may be wrong,
+but he is about the only Liberal leader, with the noble exception of
+Lord Hartington, of whom troublous times have not rasped the temper.
+Though a great reader, he is not a literary man like Mr. Morley, who
+would, however, be making phrases where Lord Rosebery would make laws.
+Sir William Harcourt has been spoken of as a possible prime minister,
+but surely it will never come to that. If Mr. Gladstone's successor is
+chosen from those who have followed him on the home-rule question, he
+probably was not rash in himself naming Lord Rosebery.
+
+Lord Rosebery could not now step up without stepping into the
+premiership. His humor, which is his most obvious faculty, has been a
+prop to him many a time ere now, but, if I was his adviser, I should
+tell him that it has served its purpose. There are a great many
+excellent people who shake their heads over it in a man who has become
+a power in the land. "Let us be grave," said Dr. Johnson once to a
+merry companion, "for here comes a fool." In an unknown novel there is
+a character who says of himself that "he is not stupid enough ever to
+be a great man." I happen to know that this reflection was evolved by
+the author out of thinking over Lord Rosebery. It is not easy for a
+bright man to be heavy, and Lord Rosebery's humor is so spontaneous
+that if a joke is made in their company he has always finished laughing
+before Lord Hartington begins. Perhaps when Lord Rosebery is on the
+point of letting his humor run off with him in a public speech, he
+could recover his solemnity by thinking of the _Examiner_.
+
+
+
+
+PROFESSOR MASSON.
+
+
+
+
+II.
+
+PROFESSOR MASSON.
+
+
+Though a man might, to my mind, be better employed than in going to
+college, it is his own fault if he does not strike on some one there
+who sends his life off at a new angle. If, as I take it, the glory of a
+professor is to give elastic minds their proper bent, Masson is a name
+his country will retain a grip of. There are men who are good to think
+of, and as a rule we only know them from their books. Something of our
+pride in life would go with their fall. To have one such professor at a
+time is the most a university can hope of human nature; so Edinburgh
+need not expect another just yet. These, of course, are only to be
+taken as the reminiscences of a student. I seem to remember everything
+Masson said, and the way he said it.
+
+Having, immediately before taken lodgings in a crow's nest, my first
+sight of Masson was specially impressive. It was the opening of the
+session, when fees were paid, and a whisper ran round the quadrangle
+that Masson had set off home with three hundred one-pound notes stuffed
+into his trouser pockets. There was a solemn swell of awestruck
+students to the gates, and some of us could not help following him. He
+took his pockets coolly. When he stopped it was at a second-hand
+bookstall, where he rummaged for a long time. Eventually he pounced
+upon a dusty, draggled little volume, and went off proudly with it
+beneath his arm. He seemed to look suspiciously at strangers now, but
+it was not the money but the book he was keeping guard over. His
+pockets, however, were unmistakably bulging out. I resolved to go in
+for literature.
+
+Masson, however, always comes to my memory first knocking nails into
+his desk or trying to tear the gas-bracket from its socket. He said
+that the Danes scattered over England, taking such a hold as a nail
+takes when it is driven into wood. For the moment he saw his desk
+turned into England; he whirled an invisible hammer in the air, and
+down it came on the desk with a crash. No one who has sat under Masson
+can forget how the Danes nailed themselves upon England. His desk is
+thick with their tombstones. It was when his mind groped for an image
+that he clutched the bracket. He seemed to tear his good things out of
+it. Silence overcame the class. Some were fascinated by the man; others
+trembled for the bracket. It shook, groaned, and yielded. Masson said
+another of the things that made his lectures literature; the crisis was
+passed; and everybody breathed again.
+
+He masters a subject by letting it master him; for though his critical
+reputation is built on honesty, it is his enthusiasm that makes his
+work warm with life. Sometimes he entered the class-room so full of
+what he had to say that he began before he reached his desk. If he was
+in the middle of a peroration when the bell rang, even the back benches
+forgot to empty. There were the inevitable students to whom literature
+is a trial, and sometimes they call attention to their sufferings by a
+scraping of the feet. Then the professor tried to fix his eyeglass on
+them, and when it worked properly they were transfixed. As a rule,
+however, it required so many adjustments that by the time his eye took
+hold of it he had remembered that students were made so, and his
+indignation went. Then, with the light in his eye that some
+photographer ought to catch, he would hope that his lecture was not
+disturbing their conversation. It was characteristic of his passion for
+being just that, when he had criticised some writer severely he would
+remember that the back benches could not understand that criticism and
+admiration might go together, unless they were told so again.
+
+The test of a sensitive man is that he is careful of wounding the
+feelings of others. Once, I remember, a student was reading a passage
+aloud, assuming at the same time such an attitude that the professor
+could not help remarking that he looked like a teapot. It was exactly
+what he did look like, and the class applauded. But next moment Masson
+had apologized for being personal. Such reminiscences are what make
+the old literature class-room to thousands of graduates a delight to
+think of.
+
+When the news of Carlyle's death reached the room, Masson could not go
+on with his lecture. Every one knows what Carlyle has said of him; and
+no one who has heard it will ever forget what he has said of Carlyle.
+Here were two men who understood each other. One of the Carlylean
+pictures one loves to dwell on shows them smoking together, with
+nothing breaking the pauses but Mrs. Carlyle's needles. Carlyle told
+Masson how he gave up smoking and then took to it again. He had walked
+from Dumfriesshire to Edinburgh to consult a doctor about his health,
+and was advised to lose his pipe. He smoked no more, but his health did
+not improve, and then one day he walked in a wood. At the foot of a
+tree lay a pipe, a tobacco pouch, a match-box. He saw clearly that this
+was a case of Providential interference, and from that moment he smoked
+again. There the professor's story stops. I have no doubt, though,
+that he nodded his head when Carlyle explained what the pipe and
+tobacco were doing there. Masson's "Milton" is, of course, his great
+work, but for sympathetic analysis I know nothing to surpass his
+"Chatterton." Lecturing on Chatterton one day, he remarked, with a
+slight hesitation, that had the poet mixed a little more in company
+and--and smoked, his morbidness would not have poisoned him. That
+turned my thoughts to smoking, because I meant to be a Chatterton, but
+greater. Since then the professor has warned me against smoking too
+much. He was smoking at the time.
+
+This is no place to follow Masson's career, nor to discuss his work. To
+reach his position one ought to know his definition of a man of
+letters. It is curious, and, like most of his departures from the
+generally accepted, sticks to the memory. By a man of letters he does
+not mean the poet, for instance, who is all soul, so much as the
+strong-brained writer whose guardian angel is a fine sanity. He used to
+mention John Skelton, the Wolsey satirist, and Sir David Lindsay, as
+typical men of letters from this point of view, and it is as a man of
+letters of that class that Masson is best considered. In an age of many
+whipper-snappers in criticism, he is something of a Gulliver.
+
+The students in that class liked to see their professor as well as hear
+him. I let my hair grow long because it only annoyed other people, and
+one day there was dropped into my hand a note containing sixpence and
+the words: "The students sitting behind you present their compliments,
+and beg that you will get your hair cut with the enclosed, as it
+interferes with their view of the professor."
+
+Masson, when he edited _Macmillan's_, had all the best men round him.
+His talk of Thackeray is specially interesting, but he always holds
+that in conversation Douglas Jerrold was unapproachable. Jerrold told
+him a good story of his seafaring days. His ship was lying off
+Gibraltar, and for some hours Jerrold, though only a midshipman, was
+left in charge. Some of the sailors begged to get ashore, and he let
+them, on the promise that they would bring him back some oranges. One
+of them disappeared, and the midshipman suffered for it. More than
+twenty years afterward Jerrold was looking in at a window in the Strand
+when he seemed to know the face of a weatherbeaten man who was doing
+the same thing. Suddenly he remembered, and put his hand on the other's
+shoulder. "My man," he said, "you have been a long time with those
+oranges!" The sailor recognized him, turned white, and took to his
+heels. There is, too, the story of how Dickens and Jerrold made up
+their quarrel at the Garrick Club. It was the occasion on which Masson
+first met the author of "Pickwick." Dickens and Jerrold had not spoken
+for a year, and they both happened to have friends at dinner in the
+strangers' room, Masson being Jerrold's guest. The two hosts sat back
+to back, but did not address each other, though the conversation was
+general. At last Jerrold could stand it no longer. Turning, he
+exclaimed, "Charley, my boy, how are you?" Dickens wheeled round and
+grasped his hand.
+
+Many persons must have noticed that, in appearance, Masson is becoming
+more and more like Carlyle every year. How would you account for it? It
+is a thing his old students often discuss when they meet, especially
+those of them who, when at college, made up their minds to dedicate
+their first book to him. The reason they seldom do it is because the
+book does not seem good enough.
+
+
+
+
+PROFESSOR JOHN STUART BLACKIE.
+
+
+
+
+III.
+
+PROFESSOR JOHN STUART BLACKIE.
+
+
+Lately I was told that Blackie--one does not say Mr. Cromwell--is no
+longer professor of Greek in Edinburgh University. What nonsense some
+people talk! As if Blackie were not part of the building! In his class
+one day he spoke touchingly of the time when he would have to join
+Socrates in the Elysian fields. A student cheered--no one knows why.
+"It won't be for some time yet," added John Stuart.
+
+Blackie takes his ease at home, in a dressing-gown and straw hat. This
+shows that his plaid really does come off. "My occupation nowadays," he
+said to me recently, "is business, blethers, bothers, beggars, and
+backgammon." He has also started a profession of going to public
+meetings, and hurrying home to write letters to the newspapers about
+them. When the editor shakes the manuscript, a sonnet falls out. I
+think I remember the professor's saying that he had never made five
+shillings by his verses. To my mind they are worth more than that.
+
+Though he has explained them frequently, there is still confusion about
+Blackie's politics. At Manchester they thought he was a Tory, and
+invited him to address them, on that understanding. "I fancy I
+astonished them," the professor said to me. This is quite possible.
+Then he was mistaken for a Liberal. The fact is that Blackie is a
+philosopher, who follows the golden mean. He sees this himself. A
+philosopher who follows the golden mean is thus a man who runs zig-zag
+between two extremes. You will observe that he who does this is some
+time before he arrives anywhere.
+
+The professor has said that he has the strongest lungs in Scotland. Of
+the many compliments that might well be paid him, not the least worthy
+would be this: that he is as healthy mentally as physically. Mrs.
+Norton begins a novel with the remark that one of the finest sights
+conceivable is a well-preserved gentleman of middle age. It will be
+some time yet before Blackie reaches middle age, but there must be
+something wrong with you if you can look at him without feeling
+refreshed. Did you ever watch him marching along Princes Street on a
+warm day, when every other person was broiling in the sun? His head is
+well thrown back, the staff, grasped in the middle, jerks back and
+forward like a weaver's shuttle, and the plaid flies in the breeze.
+Other people's clothes are hanging limp. Blackie carries his breeze
+with him.
+
+A year or two ago Mr. Gladstone, when at Dalmeny, pointed out that he
+had the advantage over Blackie in being of both Highland and Lowland
+extraction. The professor, however, is as Scotch as the thistle or his
+native hills, and Mr. Gladstone, quite justifiably, considers him the
+most outstanding of living Scotsmen. Blackie is not quite sure himself.
+Not long ago I heard him read a preface to a life of Mr. Gladstone that
+was being printed at Smyrna in modern Greek. He told his readers to
+remember that Mr. Gladstone was a great scholar and an upright
+statesman. They would find it easy to do this if they first remembered
+that he was Scottish.
+
+The _World_ included Blackie in its list of "Celebrities at Home." It
+said that the door was opened by a red-headed lassie. That was probably
+meant for local color, and it amused every one who knew Mrs. Blackie.
+The professor is one of the most genial of men, and will show you to
+your room himself, talking six languages. This tends to make the
+conversation one-sided, but he does not mind that. He still writes a
+good deal, spending several hours in his library daily, and his talk is
+as brilliant as ever. His writing nowadays is less sustained than it
+was, and he prefers flitting from one subject to another, to evolving a
+great work. When he dips his pen into an ink-pot, it at once writes a
+sonnet--so strong is the force of habit. Recently he wrote a page about
+Carlyle in a little book issued by the Edinburgh students' bazaar
+committee. In this he reproved Carlyle for having "bias." Blackie
+wonders why people should have bias.
+
+Some readers of this may in their student days have been invited to the
+Greek professor's house to breakfast, without knowing why they were
+selected from among so many. It was not, as they are probably aware,
+because of their classical attainments, for they were too thoughtful to
+be in the prize-list; nor was it because of the charm of their manners
+or the fascination of their conversation. When the professor noticed
+any physical peculiarity about a student, such as a lisp, or a glass
+eye, or one leg longer than the other, or a broken nose, he was at once
+struck by it, and asked him to breakfast. They were very lively
+breakfasts, the eggs being served in tureens; but sometimes it was a
+collection of the maimed and crooked, and one person at the table--not
+the host himself--used to tremble lest, making mirrors of each other,
+the guests should see why they were invited.
+
+Sometimes, instead of asking a student to breakfast, Blackie would
+instruct another student to request his company to tea. Then the two
+students were told to talk about paulo-post futures in the cool of the
+evening, and to read their Greek Testament and to go to the pantomime.
+The professor never tired of giving his students advice about the
+preservation of their bodily health. He strongly recommended a cold
+bath at six o'clock every morning. In winter, he remarked genially, you
+can break the ice with a hammer. According to himself, only one
+enthusiast seems to have followed his advice, and he died.
+
+In Blackie's class-room there used to be a demonstration every time he
+mentioned the name of a distinguished politician. Whether the
+demonstration took the professor by surprise or whether he waited for
+it, will never perhaps be known. But Blackie at least put out the gleam
+in his eye, and looked as if he were angry. "I will say Beaconsfield,"
+he would exclaim (cheers and hisses). "Beaconsfield" (uproar). Then he
+would stride forward, and, seizing the railing, announce his intention
+of saying Beaconsfield until every goose in the room was tired of
+cackling. ("Question.") "Beaconsfield." ("No, no.") "Beaconsfield."
+("Hear, hear," and shouts of "Gladstone.") "Beaconsfield." ("Three
+cheers for Dizzy.") Eventually the class would be dismissed as--(1)
+idiots, (2) a bear garden, (3) a flock of sheep, (4) a pack of
+numskulls, (5) hissing serpents. The professor would retire, apparently
+fuming, to his anteroom, and five minutes afterward he would be playing
+himself down the North Bridge on imaginary bagpipes. This sort of thing
+added a sauce to all academic sessions. There was a notebook also,
+which appeared year after year. It contained the professor's jokes of a
+former session, carefully classified by an admiring student. It was
+handed down from one year's men to the next; and thus, if Blackie began
+to make a joke about haggis, the possessor of the book had only swiftly
+to turn to the H's, find what the joke was, and send it along the class
+quicker than the professor could speak it.
+
+In the old days the Greek professor recited a poem in honor of the end
+of the session. He composed it himself, and, as known to me, it took
+the form of a graduate's farewell to his alma mater. Sometimes he
+would knock a map down as if overcome with emotion, and at critical
+moments a student in the back benches would accompany him on a penny
+trumpet. Now, I believe, the Hellenic Club takes the place of the
+class-room. All the eminent persons in Edinburgh attend its meetings,
+and Blackie, the Athenian, is in the chair. The policeman in Douglas
+Crescent looks skeered when you ask him what takes place on these
+occasions. It is generally understood that toward the end of the
+meeting they agree to read Greek next time.
+
+
+
+
+PROFESSOR CALDERWOOD.
+
+
+
+
+IV.
+
+PROFESSOR CALDERWOOD.
+
+
+Here is a true story that the general reader may jump, as it is
+intended for Professor Calderwood himself. Some years ago an English
+daily paper reviewed a book entitled "A Handbook of Moral Philosophy."
+The professor knows the work. The "notice" was done by the junior
+reporter, to whom philosophical treatises are generally intrusted. He
+dealt leniently, on the whole, with Professor Calderwood, even giving
+him a word of encouragement here and there. Still the criticism was
+severe. The reviewer subsequently went to Edinburgh University, and
+came out 144th in the class of moral philosophy.
+
+That student is now, I believe, on friendly terms with Professor
+Calderwood, but has never told him this story. I fancy the professor
+would like to know his name. It may perhaps be reached in this way: He
+was the young gentleman who went to his classes the first day in a
+black coat and silk hat, and was cheered round the quadrangle by a body
+of admiring fellow-students, who took him for a professor.
+
+Calderwood contrives to get himself more in touch with the mass of his
+students than some of his fellow-professors, partly because he puts a
+high ideal before himself, and to some extent because his subject is
+one that Scottish students revel in. Long before they join his class
+they know that they are moral philosophers; indeed, they are sometimes
+surer of it before they enrol than afterward. Their essays begin in
+some such fashion as this: "In joining issue with Reid, I wish to take
+no unfair advantage of my antagonist;" or, "Kant is sadly at fault when
+he says that----" or, "It is strange that a man of Locke's attainments
+should have been blind to the fact----" When the professor reads out
+these tit-bits to the class, his eyes twinkle. Some students, of
+course, are not such keen philosophers as others. Does Professor
+Calderwood remember the one who was never struck by anything in moral
+philosophy until he learned by accident that Descartes lay in bed till
+about twelve o'clock every morning? Then it dawned on him that he, too,
+must have been a philosopher all his life without knowing it. One year
+a father and son were in the class. The father got so excited over
+volition and the line that divides right from wrong that he wrenched
+the desk before him from its sockets and hit it triumphantly, meaning
+that he and the professor were at one. He was generally admired by his
+fellow-students, because he was the only one in the class who could cry
+out "Hear, hear," and even "Question," without blushing. The son, on
+the other hand, was _blase_, and would have been an agnostic, only he
+could never remember the name. Once a week Calderwood turns his class
+into a debating society, and argues things out with his students. This
+field-day is a joy to them. Some of them spend the six days previous in
+preparing posers. The worst of the professor is that he never sees that
+they are posers. What is the use of getting up a question of the most
+subtle kind, when he answers it right away? It makes you sit down quite
+suddenly. There is an occasional student who tries to convert liberty
+of speech on the discussion day into license, and of him the professor
+makes short work. The student means to turn the laugh on Calderwood,
+and then Calderwood takes advantage of him, and the other students
+laugh at the wrong person. It is the older students, as a rule, who are
+most violently agitated over these philosophical debates. One with a
+beard cracks his fingers, after the manner of a child in a village
+school that knows who won the battle of Bannockburn, and feels that he
+must burst if he does not let it out at once. A bald-headed man rises
+every minute to put a question, and then sits down, looking stupid. He
+has been trying so hard to remember what it is that he has forgotten.
+There is a legend of two who quarrelled over the Will and fought it out
+on Arthur's Seat.
+
+One year, however, a boy of sixteen or so, with a squeaky voice and a
+stammer, was Calderwood's severest critic. He sat on the back bench,
+and what he wanted to know was something about the infinite. Every
+discussion day he took advantage of a lull in the debate to squeak out,
+"With regard to the infinite," and then could never get any further. No
+one ever discovered what he wanted enlightenment on about the infinite.
+He grew despondent as the session wore on, but courageously stuck to
+his point. Probably he is a soured man now. For purposes of exposition,
+Calderwood has a blackboard in his lecture-room, on which he chalks
+circles that represent the feelings and the will, with arrows shooting
+between them. In my class there was a boy, a very little boy, who had
+been a dux at school and was a dunce at college. He could not make
+moral philosophy out at all, but did his best. Here were his complete
+notes for one day: "Edinburgh University; Class of Moral Philosophy;
+Professor Calderwood; Lecture 64; Jan. 11. 18--You rub out the arrow,
+and there is only the circle left."
+
+Professor Calderwood is passionately fond of music, as those who visit
+at his house know. He is of opinion that there is a great deal of
+moral philosophy in "The Dead March in Saul." Once he said something to
+that effect in his class, adding enthusiastically that he could excuse
+the absence of a student who had been away hearing "The Dead March in
+Saul." After that he received a good many letters from students, worded
+in this way: "Mr. McNaughton (bench 7) presents his compliments to
+Professor Calderwood, and begs to state that his absence from the class
+yesterday was owing to his being elsewhere, hearing 'The Dead March in
+Saul.'" "Dear Professor Calderwood: I regret my absence from the
+lecture to-day, but hope you will overlook it, as I was unavoidably
+detained at home, practising 'The Dead March in Saul.' Yours truly,
+Peter Webster." "Professor Calderwood: Dear Sir,--As I was coming to
+the lecture to-day, I heard 'The Dead March in Saul' being played in
+the street. You will, I am sure, make allowance for my non-attendance
+at the class, as I was too much affected to come. It is indeed a grand
+march. Yours faithfully, John Robbie." "The students whose names are
+subjoined thank the professor of moral philosophy most cordially for
+his remarks on the elevating power of music. They have been encouraged
+thereby to start a class for the proper study of the impressive and
+solemn march to which he called special attention, and hope he will
+excuse them, should their practisings occasionally prevent their
+attendance at the Friday lectures." Professor Calderwood does not
+lecture on "The Dead March in Saul" now.
+
+The class of moral philosophy is not for the few, but the many. Some
+professors do not mind what becomes of the nine students, so long as
+they can force on every tenth. Calderwood, however, considers it his
+duty to carry the whole class along with him; and it is, as a
+consequence, almost impossible to fall behind. The lectures are not
+delivered, in the ordinary sense, but dictated. Having explained the
+subject of the day with the lucidity that is this professor's peculiar
+gift, he condenses his remarks into a proposition. It is as if a
+minister ended his sermon with the text. Thus: "Proposition 34: Man is
+born into the world--(You have got that? See that you have all got
+it.) Man is born into the world with a capacity--with a capacity----"
+(Anxious student: "If you please, professor, where did you say man was
+born into?") "Into the world, with a capacity to distinguish----"
+("With a what, sir?")--"with a capacity to distinguish----" (Student:
+"Who is born into the world?") "Perhaps I have been reading too
+quickly. Man is born into the world, with a capacity to distinguish
+between--distinguish between----" (student shuts his book, thinking
+that completes the proposition)--"distinguish between right and
+wrong--right--and wrong. You have all got Proposition 34, gentlemen?"
+
+Once Calderwood was questioning a student about a proposition, to see
+that he thoroughly understood it. "Give an illustration," suggested the
+professor. The student took the case of a murderer. "Very good," said
+the professor. "Now give me another illustration." The student pondered
+for a little. "Well," he said at length, "take the case of another
+murderer."
+
+Professor Calderwood has such an exceptional interest in his students
+that he asks every one of them to his house. This is but one of many
+things that makes him generally popular; he also invites his ladies'
+class to meet them. The lady whom you take down to supper suggests
+Proposition 41 as a nice thing to talk about, and asks what you think
+of the metaphysics of ethics. Professor Calderwood sees the ladies into
+the cabs himself. It is the only thing I ever heard against him.
+
+
+
+
+PROFESSOR TAIT.
+
+
+
+
+V.
+
+PROFESSOR TAIT.
+
+
+Just as I opened my desk to write enthusiastically of Tait, I
+remembered having recently deciphered a pencil note about him, in my
+own handwriting, on the cover of Masson's "Chronological List," which I
+still keep by me. I turned to the note to see if there was life in it
+yet. "Walls," it says, "got 2s. for T. and T. at Brown's, 16 Walker
+Street." I don't recall Walls, but T. and T. was short for "Thomson and
+Tait's Elements of Natural Philosophy" (elements!), better known in my
+year as the "Student's First Glimpse of Hades." Evidently Walls sold
+his copy, but why did I take such note of the address? I fear T. and T.
+is one of the "Books Which Have Helped Me." This somewhat damps my
+ardor.
+
+When Tait was at Cambridge, it was flung in the face of the
+mathematicians that they never stood high in Scriptural knowledge.
+Tait and another were the two of whom one must be first wrangler, and
+they agreed privately to wipe this stigma from mathematics. They did it
+by taking year about the prize which was said to hang out of their
+reach. It is always interesting to know of professors who have done
+well in Biblical knowledge. All Scottish students at the English
+universities are not so successful. I knew a Snell man who was sent
+back from the Oxford entrance exam., and he always held himself that
+the Biblical questions had done it.
+
+Turner is said by medicals to be the finest lecturer in the university.
+He will never be that so long as Tait is in the natural philosophy
+chair. Never, I think, can there have been a more superb demonstrator.
+I have his burly figure before me. The small twinkling eyes had a
+fascinating gleam in them; he could concentrate them until they held
+the object looked at; when they flashed round the room he seemed to
+have drawn a rapier. I have seen a man fall back in alarm under Tait's
+eyes, though there were a dozen benches between them. These eyes could
+be merry as a boy's, though, as when he turned a tube of water on
+students who would insist on crowding too near an experiment, for
+Tait's was the humor of high spirits. I could conceive him at marbles
+still, and feeling annoyed at defeat. He could not fancy anything much
+funnier than a man missing his chair. Outside his own subject he is
+not, one feels, a six-footer. When Mr. R. L. Stevenson's memoir of the
+late Mr. Fleeming Jenkin was published, Tait said at great length that
+he did not like it; he would have had the sketch by a scientific man.
+But though scientists may be the only men nowadays who have anything to
+say, they are also the only men who can't say it. Scientific men out of
+their sphere know for a fact that novels are not true. So they draw
+back from novelists who write biography. Professor Tait and Mr.
+Stevenson are both men of note, who walk different ways, and when they
+meet neither likes to take the curbstone. If they were tied together
+for life in a three-legged race, which would suffer the more?
+
+But if Tait's science weighs him to the earth, he has a genius for
+sticking to his subject, and I am lost in admiration every time I bring
+back his lectures. It comes as natural to his old students to say when
+they meet, "What a lecturer Tait was!" as to Englishmen to joke about
+the bagpipes. It is not possible to draw a perfect circle, Chrystal
+used to say, after drawing a very fine one. To the same extent it was
+not possible for Tait never to fail in his experiments. The atmosphere
+would be too much for him once in a session, or there were other
+hostile influences at work. Tait warned us of these before proceeding
+to experiment, but we merely smiled. We believed in him as though he
+were a Bradshaw announcing that he would not be held responsible for
+possible errors.
+
+I had forgotten Lindsay--"the mother may forget her child." As I write,
+he has slipped back into his chair on the professor's right, and I
+could photograph him now in his brown suit. Lindsay was the
+imperturbable man who assisted Tait in his experiments, and his father
+held the post before him. When there were many of us together, we could
+applaud Lindsay with burlesque exaggeration, and he treated us
+good-humoredly, as making something considerable between us. But I once
+had to face Lindsay alone, in quest of my certificate; and suddenly he
+towered above me, as a waiter may grow tall when you find that you have
+not money enough to pay the bill. He treated me most kindly; did not
+reply, of course, but got the certificate, and handed it to me as a
+cashier contemptuously shovels you your pile of gold. Long ago I pasted
+up a crack in my window with the certificate, but it said, I remember,
+that I had behaved respectably--so far as I had come under the eyes of
+the professor. Tait was always an enthusiast.
+
+We have been keeping Lindsay waiting. When he had nothing special to
+do, he sat indifferently in his chair, with the face of a precentor
+after the sermon has begun. But though it was not very likely that
+Lindsay would pay much attention to talk about such playthings as the
+laws of nature, his fingers went out in the direction of the professor
+when the experiments began. Then he was not the precentor; he was a
+minister in one of the pews. Lindsay was an inscrutable man, and I
+shall not dare to say that he even half-wished to see Tait fail. He
+only looked on, ready for any emergency; but if the experiment would
+not come off, he was as quick to go to the professor's assistance as a
+member of Parliament is to begin when he has caught the Speaker's eye.
+Perhaps Tait would have none of his aid, or pushed the mechanism for
+the experiment from him--an intimation to Lindsay to carry it quickly
+to the ante-room. Do you think Lindsay read the instructions so? Let me
+tell you that your mind fails to seize hold of Lindsay. He marched the
+machine out of Tait's vicinity as a mother may push her erring boy away
+from his father's arms, to take him to her heart as soon as the door is
+closed. Lindsay took the machine to his seat, and laid it before him on
+the desk, with well-concealed apathy. Tait would flash his eye to the
+right to see what Lindsay was after, and there was Lindsay sitting with
+his arms folded. The professor's lecture resumed its way, and then out
+went Lindsay's hands to the machine. Here he tried a wheel; again he
+turned a screw; in time he had the machine ready for another trial. No
+one was looking his way, when suddenly there was a whizz--bang, bang.
+All eyes were turned upon Lindsay, the professor's among them. A cheer
+broke out as we realized that Lindsay had done the experiment. Was he
+flushed with triumph? Not a bit of it; he was again sitting with his
+arms folded. A Glasgow merchant of modest manners, when cross-examined
+in a law court, stated that he had a considerable monetary interest in
+a certain concern. "How much do you mean by a 'considerable monetary
+interest'?" demanded the contemptuous barrister who was cross-examining
+him. "Oh," said the witness, humbly, "a maiter o' a million an' a
+half--or, say, twa million." That Glasgow man in the witness-box is the
+only person I can think of, when looking about me for a parallel to
+Lindsay. While the professor eyed him and the students deliriously beat
+the floor, Lindsay quietly gathered the mechanism together and carried
+it to the ante-room. His head was not flung back nor his chest forward,
+like one who walked to music. In his hour of triumph he was still
+imperturbable. I lie back in my chair to-day, after the lapse of years,
+and ask myself again, How did Lindsay behave after he entered the
+ante-room, shutting the door behind him? Did he give way? There is no
+one to say. When he returned to the class-room he wore his familiar
+face; a man to ponder over.
+
+There is a legend about the natural philosophy class-room, the period
+long antecedent to Tait. The professor, annoyed by a habit students had
+got into of leaving their hats on his desk, announced that the next hat
+placed there would be cut in pieces by him in presence of the class.
+The warning had its effect, until one day when the professor was called
+for a few minutes from the room. An undergraduate, to whom the natural
+sciences, unrelieved, were a monotonous study, slipped into the
+ante-room, from which he emerged with the professor's hat. This he
+placed on the desk, and then stole in a panic to his seat. An awe fell
+upon the class. The professor returned, but when he saw the hat he
+stopped. He showed no anger. "Gentlemen," he said, "I told you what
+would happen if you again disobeyed my orders." Quite blandly he took a
+pen-knife from his pocket, slit the hat into several pieces, and flung
+them into the sink. While the hat was under the knife, the students
+forgot to demonstrate; but as it splashed into the sink, they gave
+forth a true British cheer. The end.
+
+Close to the door of the natural philosophy room is a window that in my
+memory will ever be sacred to a janitor. The janitors of the university
+were of varied interest, from the merry one who treated us as if we
+were his equals, and the soldier who sometimes looked as if he would
+like to mow us down, to the Head Man of All, whose name I dare not
+write, though I can whisper it. The janitor at the window, however, sat
+there through the long evenings while the Debating Society (of which I
+was a member) looked after affairs of state in an adjoining room. We
+were the smallest society in the university and the longest-winded,
+and I was once nearly expelled for not paying my subscription. Our
+grand debate was, "Is the policy of the government worthy the
+confidence of this society?" and we also read about six essays yearly
+on "The Genius of Robert Burns"; but it was on private business that we
+came out strongest. The question that agitated us most was whether the
+meetings should be opened with prayer, and the men who thought they
+should would not so much as look at the men who thought they should
+not. When the janitor was told that we had begun our private business,
+he returned to his window and slept. His great day was when we could
+not form a quorum, which happened now and then.
+
+Gregory was a member of that society--what has become of Gregory? He
+was one of those men who professors say have a brilliant future before
+them, and who have not since been heard of. Morton, another member, was
+of a different stamp. He led in the debate on "Beauty of the Mind v.
+Beauty of the Body." His writhing contempt for the beauty that is only
+skin-deep is not to be forgotten. How noble were his rhapsodies on the
+beauty of the mind! And when he went to Calderwood's to supper, how
+quick he was to pick out the prettiest girl, who took ten per cent in
+moral philosophy, and to sit beside her all the evening! Morton had a
+way of calling on his friends the night before a degree examination to
+ask them to put him up to as much as would pull him through.
+
+Tait used to get greatly excited over the rectorial elections, and, if
+he could have disguised himself, would have liked, I think, to join in
+the fight round the Brewster statue. He would have bled for the
+Conservative cause, as his utterances on university reform have shown.
+The reformers have some cause for thinking that Tait is a greater man
+in his class room than when he addresses the graduates. He has said
+that the less his students know of his subject when they join his
+class, the less, probably, they will have to unlearn. Such views are
+behind the times that feed their children on geographical biscuits in
+educational nurseries with astronomical ceilings and historical
+wall-papers.
+
+
+
+
+PROFESSOR CAMPBELL FRASER.
+
+
+
+
+VI.
+
+PROFESSOR CAMPBELL FRASER.
+
+
+Not long ago I was back in the Old University--how well I remember
+pointing it out as the jail to a stranger, who had asked me to show him
+round. I was in one of the library ante-rooms, when some one knocked,
+and I looked up, to see Campbell Fraser framed in the doorway. I had
+not looked on that venerable figure for half a dozen years. I had
+forgotten all my metaphysics. Yet it all came back with a rush. I was
+on my feet, wondering if I existed strictly so called.
+
+Calderwood and Fraser had both their followings. The moral philosophers
+wore an air of certainty, for they knew that if they stuck to
+Calderwood he would pull them through. You cannot lose yourself in the
+back garden. But the metaphysicians had their doubts. Fraser led them
+into strange places, and said he would meet them there again next day.
+They wandered to their lodgings, and got into difficulties with their
+landlady for saying that she was only an aggregate of sense phenomena.
+Fraser was rather a hazardous cure for weak intellects. Young men whose
+anchor had been certainty of themselves went into that class floating
+buoyantly on the sea of facts, and came out all adrift--on the sea of
+theory--in an open boat--rudderless--one oar--the boat scuttled. How
+could they think there was any chance for them, when the professor was
+not even sure of himself? I see him rising in a daze from his chair and
+putting his hands through his hair. "Do I exist," he said,
+thoughtfully, "strictly so called?" The students (if it was the
+beginning of the session) looked a little startled. This was a matter
+that had not previously disturbed them. Still, if the professor was in
+doubt, there must be something in it. He began to argue it out, and an
+uncomfortable silence held the room in awe. If he did not exist, the
+chances were that they did not exist either. It was thus a personal
+question. The professor glanced round slowly for an illustration. "Am
+I a table?" A pained look travelled over the class. Was it just
+possible that they were all tables? It is no wonder that the students
+who do not go to the bottom during their first month of metaphysics
+begin to give themselves airs strictly so called. In the privacy of
+their room at the top of the house, they pinch themselves to see if
+they are still there.
+
+He would, I think, be a sorry creature who did not find something to
+admire in Campbell Fraser. Metaphysics may not trouble you, as it
+troubles him, but you do not sit under the man without seeing his
+transparent honesty and feeling that he is genuine. In appearance and
+in habit of thought he is an ideal philosopher, and his communings with
+himself have lifted him to a level of serenity that is worth struggling
+for. Of all the arts professors in Edinburgh, he is probably the most
+difficult to understand, and students in a hurry have called his
+lectures childish. If so, it may be all the better for them. For the
+first half of the hour, they say, he tells you what he is going to do,
+and for the second half he revises. Certainly he is vastly explanatory,
+but then he is not so young as they are, and so he has his doubts. They
+are so cock-sure that they wonder to see him hesitate. Often there is a
+mist on the mountain when it is all clear in the valley.
+
+Fraser's great work is his edition of Berkeley, a labor of love that
+should live after him. He has two Berkeleys, the large one and the
+little one, and, to do him justice, it was the little one he advised us
+to consult. I never read the large one myself, which is in a number of
+monster tomes, but I often had a look at it in the library, and I was
+proud to think that an Edinburgh professor was the editor. When Glasgow
+men came through to talk of their professors, we showed them the big
+Berkeley, and after that they were reasonable. There was one man in my
+year who really began the large Berkeley, but after a time he was
+missing, and it is believed that some day he will be found flattened
+between the pages of the first volume.
+
+The "Selections" was the text-book we used in the class. It is
+sufficient to prove that Berkeley wrote beautiful English. I am not
+sure that any one has written such English since. We have our own
+"stylists," but how self-conscious they are after Berkeley! It is seven
+years since I opened my "Selections," but I see that I was once more of
+a metaphysician than I have been giving myself credit for. The book is
+scribbled over with posers in my handwriting about dualism and primary
+realities. Some of the comments are in short-hand, which I must at one
+time have been able to read, but all are equally unintelligible now.
+Here is one of my puzzlers: "Does B here mean impercipient and
+unperceived subject or conscious and percipient subject?" Observe the
+friendly B. I dare say further on I shall find myself referring to the
+professor as F. I wonder if I ever discovered what B meant. I could not
+now tell what I meant, myself.
+
+As many persons are aware, the "Selections" consist of Berkeley's text
+with the professor's notes thereon. The notes are explanatory of the
+text, and the student must find them an immense help. Here, for
+instance, is a note: "Phenomenal or sense dependent existence can be
+substantiated and caused only by a self-conscious spirit, for otherwise
+there could be no propositions about it expressive of what is
+conceivable; on the other hand, to affirm that phenomenal or sense
+dependent existence, which alone we know, and which alone is
+conceivable, is, or even represents, an inconceivable non-phenomenal or
+abstract existence, would be to affirm a contradiction in terms." There
+we have it.
+
+As a metaphysician I was something of a disappointment. I began well,
+standing, if I recollect aright, in the three examinations, first,
+seventeenth, and seventy-seventh. A man who sat beside me--man was the
+word we used--gazed at me reverently when I came out first, and I could
+see by his eye that he was not sure whether I existed properly so
+called. By the second exam. his doubts had gone, and by the third he
+was surer of me than of himself. He came out fifty-seventh, this being
+the grand triumph of his college course. He was the same whose key
+translated _cras donaberis haedo_ "To-morrow you will be presented with
+a kid," but who, thinking that a little vulgar, refined it down to
+"To-morrow you will be presented with a small child."
+
+In the metaphysics class I was like the fountains in the quadrangle,
+which ran dry toward the middle of the session. While things were still
+looking hopeful for me, I had an invitation to breakfast with the
+professor. If the fates had been so propitious as to forward me that
+invitation, it is possible that I might be a metaphysician to this day,
+but I had changed my lodgings, and, when I heard of the affair, all was
+over. The professor asked me to stay behind one day after the lecture,
+and told me that he had got his note back with "Left: no address" on
+it. "However," he said, "you may keep this," presenting me with the
+invitation for the Saturday previously. I mention this to show that
+even professors have hearts. That letter is preserved with the
+autographs of three editors, none of which anybody can read.
+
+There was once a medical student who came up to my rooms early in the
+session, and I proved to him in half an hour that he did not exist. He
+got quite frightened, and I can still see his white face as he sat
+staring at me in the gloaming. This shows what metaphysics can do. He
+has recovered, however, and is sheep-farming now, his examiners never
+having asked him the right questions.
+
+The last time Fraser ever addressed me was when I was capped. He said,
+"I congratulate you, Mr. Smith," and one of the other professors said,
+"I congratulate you, Mr. Fisher." My name is neither Smith nor Fisher,
+but no doubt the thing was kindly meant. It was then, however, that the
+professor of metaphysics had his revenge on me. I had once spelt Fraser
+with a "z."
+
+
+
+
+PROFESSOR CHRYSTAL.
+
+
+
+
+VII.
+
+PROFESSOR CHRYSTAL.
+
+
+When Chrystal came to Edinburgh, he rooted up the humors of the
+class-room as a dentist draws teeth. Souls were sold for keys that
+could be carried in the waistcoat pocket. Ambition fell from heights,
+and lay with its eye on a certificate. By night was a rush of ghosts,
+shrieking for passes. Horse-play fled before the Differential Calculus
+in spectacles.
+
+I had Chrystal's first year, and recall the gloomy student sitting
+before me who hacked "All hope abandon, ye who enter here" into a desk
+that may have confined Carlyle. It took him a session, and he was
+digging his own grave, for he never got through; but it was something
+to hold by, something he felt sure of. All else was spiders' webs in
+chalk.
+
+Chrystal was a fine hare for the hounds who could keep up with him. He
+started off the first day with such a spurt that most of us were left
+behind mopping our faces, and saying, "Here's a fellow," which is what
+Mr. Stevenson says Shakespeare would have remarked about Mr. George
+Meredith. We never saw him again. The men who were on speaking
+acquaintance with his symbols revelled in him as students love an
+enthusiast who is eager to lead them into a world toward which they
+would journey. He was a rare guide for them. The bulk, however, lost
+him in labyrinths. They could not but admire their brilliant professor;
+but while their friend the medallist and he kept the conversation to
+themselves, they felt like eavesdroppers hearkening to a pair of
+lovers. It is "beautiful," they cried, "but this is no place for us;
+let us away."
+
+A good many went, but their truancy stuck in their throats like Otway's
+last roll. The M.A. was before them. They had fancied it in their
+hands, but it became shy as a maiden from the day they learned
+Chrystal's heresy that Euclid is not mathematics, but only some riders
+in it. This snapped the cord that had tied the blind man to his dog,
+and the M.A. shot down the horizon. When Rutherford delivered his first
+lecture in the chair of institutes of medicine, boisterous students
+drowned his voice, and he flung out of the room. At the door he paused
+to say, "Gentleman, we shall meet again at Philippi." A dire bomb was
+this in the midst of them, warranted to go off, none able to cast it
+overboard. We too had our Philippi before us. Chrystal could not be
+left to his own devices.
+
+I had never a passion for knowing that when circles or triangles
+attempt impossibilities it is absurd; and _x_ was an unknown quantity I
+was ever content to walk round about. To admit to Chrystal that we
+understood _x_ was only a way he had of leading you on to _y_ and _z_.
+I gave him his chance, however, by contributing a paper of answers to
+his first weekly set of exercises. When the hour for returning the
+slips came round, I was there to accept fame--if so it was to be--with
+modesty; and if it was to be humiliation, still to smile. The professor
+said there was one paper, with an owner's name on it, which he could
+not read, and it was handed along the class to be deciphered. My
+presentiment that it was mine became a certainty when it reached my
+hand; but I passed it on pleasantly, and it returned to Chrystal, a
+Japhet that never found its father. Feeling that the powers were
+against me, I then retired from the conflict, sanguine that the
+teaching of my mathematical schoolmaster, the best that could be, would
+pull me through. The Disowned may be going the round of the class-room
+still.
+
+The men who did not know when they were beaten returned to their seats,
+and doggedly took notes, their faces lengthening daily. Their
+note-books reproduced exactly the hieroglyphics of the blackboard, and,
+examined at night, were as suggestive as the photographs of persons one
+has never seen. To overtake Chrystal after giving him a start was the
+presumption that is an offshoot from despair. There was once an elderly
+gentleman who for years read the _Times_ every day from the first page
+to the last. For a fortnight he was ill of a fever; but, on recovering,
+he began at the copy of the _Times_ where he had left off. He
+struggled magnificently to make up on the _Times_, but it was in vain.
+This is an allegory for the way these students panted after Chrystal.
+
+Some succumbed and joined the majority--literally; for to mathematics
+they were dead. I never hear of the old university now, nor pass under
+the shadow of the walls one loves when he is done with them, without
+seeing myself as I was the day I matriculated, an awestruck boy,
+passing and repassing the gates, frightened to venture inside,
+breathing heavily at sight of janitors, Scott and Carlyle in the air.
+After that I see nothing fuller of color than the meetings that were
+held outside Chrystal's door. Adjoining it is a class-room so little
+sought for that legend tells of its door once showing the notice,
+"There will be no class to-day, as the student is unwell." The crowd
+round Chrystal's could have filled that room. It was composed of
+students hearkening at the door to see whether he was to call their
+part of the roll to-day. If he did, they slunk in; if not, the crowd
+melted into the streets, this refrain in their ears:
+
+     "I'm plucked, I do admit;
+       I'm spun, my mother dear:
+     Yet do not grieve for that
+       Which happens every year.
+     I've waited very patiently,
+       I may have long to wait;
+     But you've another son, mother,
+       And he will graduate."
+
+A professor of mathematics once brought a rowdy student from the back
+benches to a seat beside him, because: "First, you'll be near the
+board; second, you'll be near me; and, third, you'll be near the door."
+Chrystal soon discovered that students could be too near the door, and
+he took to calling the roll in the middle of the hour, which insured an
+increased attendance. It was a silent class, nothing heard but the
+patter of pencils, rats scraping for grain, of which there was
+abundance, but not one digestion in a bench. To smuggle in a novel up
+one's waistcoat was perilous, Chrystal's spectacles doing their work.
+At a corner of the platform sat the assistant, with a constable's
+authority, but, not formed for swooping, uneasy because he had legs,
+and where to put them he knew not. He got through the hour by shifting
+his position every five minutes; and, sitting there waiting, he
+reminded one of the boy who, on being told to remain so quietly where
+he was that he could hear a pin drop, held his breath a moment, then
+shouted, "Let it drop!" An excellent fellow was this assistant, who
+told us that one of his predecessors had got three months.
+
+A jest went as far in that class as a plum in the midshipmen's pudding,
+and, you remember, when the middies came on a plum they gave three
+cheers. In the middle of some brilliant reasoning, Chrystal would stop
+to add 4, 7, and 11. Addition of this kind was the only thing he could
+not do, and he looked to the class for help--"20," they shouted, "24,"
+"17," while he thought it over. These appeals to their intelligence
+made them beam. They woke up as a sleepy congregation shakes itself
+into life when the minister says, "I remember when I was a little
+boy----"
+
+The daring spirits--say, those who were going into their father's
+office, and so did not look upon Chrystal as a door locked to their
+advancement--sought to bring sunshine into the room. Chrystal soon had
+the blind down on that. I hear they have been at it recently, with the
+usual result. To relieve the monotony, a student at the end of bench
+ten dropped a marble, which toppled slowly downward toward the
+professor. At every step it took, there was a smothered guffaw; but
+Chrystal, who was working at the board, did not turn his head. When the
+marble reached the floor, he said, still with his back to the class,
+"Will the student at the end of bench ten, who dropped that marble,
+stand up?" All eyes dilated. He had counted the falls of the marble
+from step to step. Mathematics do not obscure the intellect.
+
+Twenty per cent was a good percentage in Chrystal's examinations;
+thirty sent you away whistling. As the M.A. drew nigh, students on
+their prospects might have been farmers discussing the weather. Some
+put their faith in the professor's goodness of heart, of which
+symptoms had been showing. He would not, all at once, "raise the
+standard"--hated phrase until you are through, when you write to the
+papers advocating it. Courage! was it not told of the Glasgow Snell
+competition that one of the competitors, as soon as he saw the first
+paper, looked for his hat and the door; that he was forbidden to
+withdraw until an hour had elapsed, and that he then tackled the paper
+and ultimately carried off the Snell? Of more immediate interest,
+perhaps, was the story of the quaking student, whose neighbor handed
+him in pencil, beneath the desk, the answer to several questions. It
+was in an M.A. exam., and the affrighted student found that he could
+not read his neighbor's notes. Trusting to fortune, he inclosed them
+with his own answers, writing at the top, "No time to write these out
+in ink, so inclose them in pencil." He got through: no moral.
+
+A condemned criminal wondering if he is to get a reprieve will not feel
+the position novel if he has loitered in a university quadrangle
+waiting for the janitor to nail up the results of a degree exam. A
+queer gathering we were, awaiting the verdict of Chrystal. Some
+compressed their lips, others were lively as fireworks dipped in water;
+there were those who rushed round and round the quadrangle; only one
+went the length of saying that he did not want to pass. H. I shall call
+him. I met him the other day in Fleet Street, and he annoyed me by
+asking at once if I remembered the landlady I quarrelled with because
+she wore my socks to church of a Sunday: we found her out one wet
+forenoon. H. waited the issue with a cigar in his mouth. He had
+purposely, he explained, given in a bad paper. He could not understand
+why men were so anxious to get through. He had ten reasons for wishing
+to be plucked. We let him talk. The janitor appeared with the fateful
+paper, and we lashed about him like waves round a lighthouse, all but
+H., who strolled languidly to the board to which the paper was being
+fastened. A moment afterward I heard a shriek: "I'm through! I'm
+through!" It was H. His cigar was dashed aside, and he sped like an
+arrow from the bow to the nearest telegraph office, shouting "I'm
+through!" as he ran.
+
+Those of us who had H.'s fortune now consider Chrystal made to order
+for his chair, but he has never, perhaps, had a proper appreciation of
+the charming fellows who get ten per cent.
+
+
+
+
+PROFESSOR SELLAR.
+
+
+
+
+VIII.
+
+PROFESSOR SELLAR.
+
+
+When one of the distinguished hunting ladies who chase celebrities
+captured Mr. Mark Pattison, he gave anxious consideration to the
+quotation which he was asked to write above his name. "Fancy," he said
+with a shudder, "going down to posterity arm in arm with _carpe diem_!"
+Remembering this, I forbear tying Sellar to _odi profanum vulgus_. Yet
+the name opens the door to the quotation. Sellar is a Roman senator. He
+stood very high at Oxford, and took a prize for boxing. If you watch
+him in the class, you will sometimes see his mind murmuring that
+Edinburgh students do not take their play like Oxford men. The
+difference is in manner. A courteous fellow-student of Sellar once
+showed his relatives over Balliol. "You have now, I think," he said at
+last, "seen everything of interest except the master." He flung a
+stone at a window, at which the master's head appeared immediately,
+menacing, wrathful. "And now," concluded the polite youth, "you have
+seen him also."
+
+Mr. James Payn, who never forgave the Scottish people for pulling down
+their blinds on Sundays, was annoyed by the halo they have woven around
+the name "professor." He knew an Edinburgh lady who was scandalized
+because that mere poet, Alexander Smith, coolly addressed professors by
+their surnames. Mr. Payn might have known what it is to walk in the
+shadow of a Senatus Academicus could he have met such specimens as
+Sellar, Fraser, Tait, and Sir Alexander Grant marching down the Bridges
+abreast. I have seen them: an inspiriting sight. The pavement only held
+three. You could have shaken hands with them from an upper window.
+
+Sellar's treatment of his students was always that of a fine gentleman.
+Few got near him; all respected him. At times he was addressed in an
+unknown tongue, but he kept his countenance. He was particular about
+students keeping to their proper benches, and once thought he had
+caught a swarthy north countryman straying. "You are in your wrong
+seat, Mr. Orr." "Na, am richt eneuch." "You should be in the seat in
+front. That is bench 12, and you are entered on bench 10." "Eh? This is
+no bench twal, [counting] twa, fower, sax, aucht, ten." "There is
+something wrong." "Oh-h-h, [with sudden enlightenment] ye've been
+coontin' the first dask; we dinna coont the first dask." The professor
+knew the men he had to deal with too well to scorn this one, who turned
+out to be a fine fellow. He was the only man I ever knew who ran his
+medical and arts classes together, and so many lectures had he to
+attend daily that he mixed them up. He graduated, however, in both
+faculties in five years, and the last I heard of him was that, when
+applying for a medical assistantship, he sent his father's photograph
+because he did not have one of himself. He was a man of brains as well
+as sinew, and dined briskly on a shilling a week.
+
+There was a little fellow in the class who was a puzzle to Sellar,
+because he was higher sitting than standing: when the professor asked
+him to stand up, he stood down. "Is Mr. Blank not present?" Sellar
+would ask. "Here, sir," cried Blank. "Then, will you stand up, Mr.
+Blank?" (Agony of Blank, and a demonstration of many feet.) "Are you
+not prepared, Mr. Blank?" "Yes, sir. _Pastor quum traharet_----" "I
+insist on your standing up, Mr. Blank." Several students rise to their
+feet to explain, but subside. "Yes, sir. _Pastor quum traharet
+per_----" "I shall mark you 'Not prepared,' Mr. Blank." (Further
+demonstration, and then an indignant squeak from Blank.) "If you
+please, sir, I am standing." "But, in that case, how is it? Ah, oh, ah,
+yes; proceed, Mr. Blank." As one man was only called upon for
+exhibition five or six times in a year, the professor had always
+forgotten the circumstances when he asked Blank to stand up again.
+Blank was looked upon by his fellow-students as a practical jest, and
+his name was always received with the prolonged applause which greets
+the end of an after-dinner speech.
+
+Sellar never showed resentment to the students who addressed him as
+Professor Sellars.
+
+One day the professor was giving out some English to be translated into
+Latin prose. He read on--"and fiercely lifting the axe with both
+hands----" when a cheer from the top bench made him pause. The cheer
+spread over the room like an uncorked gas. Sellar frowned, but
+proceeded--"lifting the axe----" when again the class became demented.
+"What does this mean?" he demanded, looking as if he, too, could lift
+the axe. "Axe!" shouted a student in explanation. Still Sellar could
+not solve the riddle. Another student rose to his assistance.
+"Axe--Gladstone!" he cried. Sellar sat back in his chair. "Really,
+gentlemen," he said, "I take the most elaborate precautions against
+touching upon politics in this class, but sometimes you are beyond me.
+Let us continue--'and fiercely lifting his weapon with both hands----'"
+
+The duxes from the schools suffered a little during their first year,
+from a feeling that they and Sellar understood each other. He liked to
+undeceive them. We had one, all head, who went about wondering at
+himself. He lost his bursary on the way home with it, and still he
+strutted. Sellar asked if we saw anything peculiar in a certain line
+from Horace. We did not. We were accustomed to trust to Horace's
+reputation, all but the dandy. "Eh--ah! professor," he lisped; "it
+ought to have been so and so." Sellar looked at this promising plant
+from the schools, and watered him without a rose on the pan. "Depend
+upon it, Mr.--ah, I did not catch your name, if it ought to have been
+so and so, Horace would have made it so and so."
+
+Sellar's face was proof against wit. It did not relax till he gave it
+liberty. You could never tell from it what was going on inside. He read
+without a twitch a notice on his door: "Found in this class a
+gold-headed pencil case; if not claimed within three days will be sold
+to defray expenses." He even withstood the battering-ram on the day of
+the publication of his "Augustan Poets." The students could not let
+this opportunity pass. They assailed him with frantic applause; every
+bench was a drum to thump upon. His countenance said nothing. The drums
+had it in the end, though, and he dismissed the class with what is
+believed to have verged on a smile. Like the lover who has got his
+lady's glance, they at once tried for more, but no.
+
+Most of us had Humanity our first year, which is the year for
+experimenting. Then is the time to join the university library. The
+pound, which makes you a member, has never had its poet. You can
+withdraw your pound when you please. There are far-seeing men who work
+the whole thing out by mathematics. Put simply, this is the notion. In
+the beginning of the session you join the library, and soon you forget
+about your pound; you reckon without it. As the winter closes in, and
+the coal-bunk empties; or you find that five shillings a week for
+lodgings is a dream that cannot be kept up; or your coat assumes more
+and more the color identified with spring; or you would feast your
+friends for once right gloriously; or next Wednesday is your little
+sister's birthday; you cower, despairing, over a sulky fire. Suddenly
+you are on your feet, all aglow once more. What is this thought that
+sends the blood to your head? That library pound! You had forgotten
+that you had a bank. Next morning you are at the university in time to
+help the library door to open. You ask for your pound; you get it. Your
+hand mounts guard over the pocket in which it rustles. So they say. I
+took their advice and paid in my money; then waited exultingly to
+forget about it. In vain. I always allowed for that pound, in my
+thoughts. I saw it as plainly, I knew its every feature as a schoolboy
+remembers his first trout. Not to be hasty, I gave my pound two months,
+and then brought it home again. I had a fellow-student who lived across
+the way from me. We railed at the library-pound theory at open windows
+over the life of the street; a beautiful dream, but mad, mad.
+
+He was an enthusiast, and therefore happy, whom I have seen in the
+Humanity class-room on an examination day, his pen racing with time,
+himself seated in the contents of an ink bottle. Some stories of exams.
+have even a blacker ending. I write in tears of him who, estimating his
+memory as a leaky vessel, did with care and forethought draw up a crib
+that was more condensed than a pocket cyclopaedia, a very Liebig's
+essence of the classics, tinned meat for students in the eleventh hour.
+Bridegrooms have been known to forget the ring; this student forgot his
+crib. In the middle of the examination came a nervous knocking at the
+door. A lady wanted to see the professor at once. The student looked
+up, to see his mother handing the professor his crib. Her son had
+forgotten it; she was sure that it was important, so she had brought it
+herself.
+
+Jump the body of this poor victim. There was no M.A. for him that year;
+but in our gowns and sashes we could not mourn for a might-have-been.
+Soldiers talk of the Victoria cross, statesmen of the Cabinet, ladies
+of a pearl set in diamonds. These are pretty baubles, but who has
+thrilled as the student that with bumping heart strolls into
+Middlemass' to order his graduate's gown? He hires it--five
+shillings--but the photograph to follow makes it as good as his for
+life. Look at him, young ladies, as he struts to the Synod Hall to have
+M.A. tacked to his name. Dogs do not dare bark at him. His gait is
+springy; in Princes Street he is as one who walks upstairs. Gone to me
+are those student days forever, but I can still put a photograph before
+me of a ghost in gown and cape, the hair straggling under the cap as
+tobacco may straggle over the side of a tin when there is difficulty in
+squeezing down the lid. How well the little black jacket looks, how
+vividly the wearer remembers putting it on. He should have worn a
+dress-coat, but he had none. The little jacket resembled one with the
+tails off, and, as he artfully donned his gown, he backed against the
+wall so that no one might know.
+
+To turn up the light on old college days is not always the signal for
+the dance. You are back in the dusty little lodging, with its battered
+sofa, its slippery tablecloth, the prim array of books, the picture of
+the death of Nelson, the peeling walls, the broken clock; you are
+again in the quadrangle with him who has been dead this many a year.
+There are tragedies in a college course. Dr. Walter Smith has told in a
+poem mentioned elsewhere of the brilliant scholar who forgot his
+dominie; some, alas! forget their mother. There are men--I know it--who
+go mad from loneliness; and medallists ere now have crept home to die.
+The capping-day was the end of our springtide, and for some of us the
+summer was to be brief. Sir Alexander, gone into the night since then,
+flung "I mekemae" at us as we trooped past him, all in bud, some small
+flower to blossom in time, let us hope, here and there.
+
+
+
+
+MR. JOSEPH THOMSON.
+
+
+
+
+IX.
+
+MR. JOSEPH THOMSON.
+
+
+Two years hence Joseph Thomson's reputation will be a decade old,
+though he is at present only thirty years of age. When you meet him for
+the first time you conclude that he must be the explorer's son. His
+identity, however, can always be proved by simply mentioning Africa in
+his presence. Then he draws himself up, and his eyes glisten, and he is
+thinking how glorious it would be to be in the Masai country again,
+living on meat so diseased that it crumbled in the hand like
+short-bread.
+
+Gatelaw-bridge Quarry, in Dumfriesshire, is famous for Old Mortality
+and Thomson, the latter (when he is at the head of a caravan) being as
+hardheaded as if he had been cut out of it. He went to school at
+Thornhill, where he spent great part of his time in reading novels, and
+then he matriculated at Edinburgh University, where he began to
+accumulate medals. Geology and kindred studies were his favorites
+there. One day he heard that Keith Johnston, then on the point of
+starting for Africa, wanted a lieutenant. Thomson was at that time
+equally in need of a Keith Johnston, and everybody who knew him saw
+that the opening and he were made for each other. Keith Johnston and
+Thomson went out together, and Johnston died in the jungle. This made a
+man in an hour of a stripling. Most youths in Thomson's position at
+that turning-point of his career would have thought it judicious to
+turn back, and in geographical circles it would have been considered
+highly creditable had he brought his caravan to the coast intact.
+Thomson, however, pushed on, and did everything that his dead leader
+had hoped to do. From that time his career has been followed by every
+one interested in African exploration, and by his countrymen with some
+pride in addition. When an expedition was organized for the relief of
+Emin Pacha, there was for a time some probability of Thomson's having
+the command.
+
+He and Stanley differed as to the routes that should be taken, and
+subsequent events have proved that Thomson's was the proper one.
+
+Thomson came over from Paris at that time to consult with the
+authorities, and took up his residence in the most overgrown hotel in
+London. His friends here organized an expedition for his relief. They
+wandered up and down the endless stairs looking for him, till, had they
+not wanted to make themselves a name, they would have beaten a retreat.
+He also wandered about looking for them, and at last they met. The
+leader of the party, restraining his emotion, lifted his hat, and said,
+"Mr. Thomson, I presume?" This is how I found Thomson.
+
+The explorer had been for some months in Paris at that time, and France
+did him the honor of translating his "Through Masailand" into French.
+In this book there is a picture of a buffalo tossing Thomson in the
+air. This was after he had put several bullets into it, and in the
+sketch he is represented some ten feet from the ground, with his gun
+flying one way and his cap another. "It was just as if I were
+distributing largess to the natives," the traveller says now, though
+this idea does not seem to have struck him at the time. He showed the
+sketch to a Parisian lady, who looked at it long and earnestly. "Ah, M.
+Thomson," she said at length, "but how could you pose like that?"
+
+Like a good many other travellers, including Mr. Du Chaillu, who says
+he is a dear boy, Thomson does not smoke. Stanley, however, smokes very
+strong cigars, as those who have been in his sumptuous chambers in Bond
+Street can testify. All the three happen to be bachelors, though;
+because, one of them says, after returning from years of lonely travel,
+a man has such a delight in female society that to pick and choose
+would be invidious. Yet they have had their chance. An African race
+once tried to bribe Mr. Du Chaillu with a kingdom and over eight
+hundred wives--"the biggest offer," he admits, "I ever had in one day."
+
+Among the lesser annoyances to which Thomson was subjected in Africa
+was the presence of rats in the night-time, which he had to brush away
+like flies. Until he was asked whether there was not danger in this, it
+never seems to have struck him that it was more than annoying. Yet
+though he and the two other travellers mentioned (doubtless they are
+not alone in this) have put up cheerfully with almost every hardship
+known to man, this does not make them indifferent to the comforts of
+civilization when they return home. Du Chaillu was looking very
+comfortable in a house-boat the other day, where his hosts thought they
+were "roughing it"--with a male attendant; and in Stanley's easy-chairs
+you sink to dream. The last time I saw Thomson in his rooms in London
+he was on his knees, gazing in silent rapture at a china saucer with a
+valuable crack in it.
+
+If you ask Thomson what was the most dangerous expedition he ever
+embarked on, he will probably reply, "Crossing Piccadilly." The finest
+thing that can be said of him is that during these four expeditions he
+never once fired a shot at a native. Other explorers have had to do so
+to save their lives. There were often occasions when Thomson could have
+done it, to save his life to all appearance, too. The result of his
+method of progressing is that where he has gone--and he has been in
+parts of Africa never before trod by the white man--he really has
+"opened up the country" for those who care to follow him. Civilization
+by bullet has only closed it elsewhere. Yet though there is an
+abundance of Scotch caution about him, he is naturally an impulsive
+man, more inclined personally to march straight on than to reach his
+destination by a safer if more circuitous route. Where only his own
+life is concerned, he gives you the impression of one who might be
+rash; but his prudence at the head of a caravan is at the bottom of the
+faith that is placed in him. According to a story that got into the
+papers years ago, M. de Brazza once quarrelled with Thomson in Africa,
+and all but struck him. Thomson was praised for keeping his temper. The
+story was a fabrication, but I fear that if M. de Brazza had behaved
+like this, Thomson would not have remembered to be diplomatic till
+some time afterward. A truer tale might be told of an umbrella,
+gorgeous and wonderful to behold, that De Brazza took to Africa to
+impress the natives with, and which Thomson subsequently presented to a
+dusky monarch.
+
+The explorer has never shot a lion, though he has tracked a good many
+of them. Once he thought he had one. It was reclining in a little
+grove, and Thomson felt that it was his at last. With a trusty native
+he crept forward till he could obtain a good shot, and then fired. In
+breathless suspense he waited for its spring, and then when it did not
+spring he saw that he had shot it through the heart. However, it turned
+out only to be a large stone.
+
+The young Scotchman sometimes thinks of the tremendous effect it would
+have had on the natives had he been the possessor of a complete set of
+artificial teeth. This is because he has one artificial tooth.
+Happening to take it out one day, an awe filled all who saw him, and
+from that hour he was esteemed a medicine man. Another excellent way of
+impressing Africa with the grandeur of Britain was to take a
+photograph. When the natives saw the camera aimed at them, they fell to
+the ground vanquished.
+
+When Thomson was recently in this country, he occasionally took a walk
+of twenty or thirty miles to give him an appetite for dinner. This he
+calls a stroll. One day he strolled from Thornhill to Edinburgh, had
+dinner, and then went to the Exhibition. In appearance he is tall and
+strongly knit rather than heavily built, and if you see him more than
+once in the same week you discover that he has still an interest in
+neck-ties. Perhaps his most remarkable feat consisted in taking a
+bottle of brandy into the heart of Africa, and bringing it back
+intact.
+
+
+
+
+ROBERT LOUIS STEVENSON.
+
+
+
+
+X.
+
+ROBERT LOUIS STEVENSON.
+
+
+Some men of letters, not necessarily the greatest, have an
+indescribable charm to which we give our hearts. Thackeray is the young
+man's first love. Of living authors, none perhaps bewitches the reader
+more than Mr. Stevenson, who plays upon words as if they were a musical
+instrument. To follow the music is less difficult than to place the
+musician. A friend of mine, who, like Mr. Grant Allen, reviews 365
+books a year, and 366 in leap years, recently arranged the novelists of
+to-day in order of merit. Meredith, of course, he wrote first, and then
+there was a fall to Hardy. "Haggard," he explained, "I dropped from the
+Eiffel Tower; but what can I do with Stevenson? I can't put him before
+'Lorna Doone.'" So Mr. Stevenson puzzles the critics, fascinating them
+until they are willing to judge him by the great work he is to write
+by and by when the little books are finished. Over "Treasure Island" I
+let my fire die in winter without knowing that I was freezing. But the
+creator of Alan Breck has now published nearly twenty volumes. It is so
+much easier to finish the little works than to begin the great one, for
+which we are all taking notes.
+
+Mr. Stevenson is not to be labelled novelist. He wanders the byways of
+literature without any fixed address. Too much of a truant to be
+classified with the other boys, he is only a writer of fiction in the
+sense that he was once an Edinburgh University student because now and
+again he looked in at his classes when he happened to be that way. A
+literary man without a fixed occupation amazes Mr. Henry James, a
+master in the school of fiction which tells, in three volumes, how
+Hiram K. Wilding trod on the skirt of Alice M. Sparkins without
+anything's coming of it. Mr. James analyzes Mr. Stevenson with immense
+cleverness, but without summing up. That "Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde"
+should be by the author of "Treasure Island," "Virginibus Puerisque"
+by the author of "The New Arabian Nights," "A Child's Garden of Verses"
+by the author of "Prince Otto," are to him the three degrees of
+comparison of wonder, though for my own part I marvel more that the
+author of "Daisy Miller" should be Mr. Stevenson's eulogist. One
+conceives Mr. James a boy in velveteens looking fearfully at Stevenson
+playing at pirates.
+
+There is nothing in Mr. Stevenson's sometimes writing essays, sometimes
+romances, and anon poems to mark him versatile beyond other authors.
+One dreads his continuing to do so, with so many books at his back,
+lest it means weakness rather than strength. He experiments too long;
+he is still a boy wondering what he is going to be. With Cowley's
+candor he tells us that he wants to write something by which he may be
+forever known. His attempts in this direction have been in the nature
+of trying different ways, and he always starts off whistling. Having
+gone so far without losing himself, he turns back to try another road.
+Does his heart fail him, despite his jaunty bearing, or is it because
+there is no hurry? Though all his books are obviously by the same hand,
+no living writer has come so near fame from so many different sides.
+Where is the man among us who could write another "Virginibus
+Puerisque," the most delightful volume for the hammock ever sung in
+prose? The poems are as exquisite as they are artificial. "Jekyll and
+Hyde" is the greatest triumph extant in Christmas literature of the
+morbid kind. The donkey on the Cevennes (how Mr. Stevenson belabored
+him!) only stands second to the "Inland Voyage." "Kidnapped" is the
+outstanding boy's book of its generation. "The Black Arrow" alone, to
+my thinking, is second class. We shall all be doleful if a marksman who
+can pepper his target with inners does not reach the bull's-eye. But it
+is quite time the great work was begun. The sun sinks while the climber
+walks round his mountain, looking for the best way up.
+
+Hard necessity has kept some great writers from doing their best work,
+but Mr. Stevenson is at last so firmly established that if he
+continues to be versatile it will only be from choice. He has attained
+a popularity such as is, as a rule, only accorded to classic authors or
+to charlatans. For this he has America to thank rather than Britain,
+for the Americans buy his books, the only honor a writer's admirers are
+slow to pay him. Mr. Stevenson's reputation in the United States is
+creditable to that country, which has given him a position here in
+which only a few saw him when he left. Unfortunately, with popularity
+has come publicity. All day the reporters sit on his garden wall.
+
+No man has written in a finer spirit of the profession of letters than
+Mr. Stevenson, but this gossip vulgarizes it. The adulation of the
+American public and of a little band of clever literary dandies in
+London, great in criticism, of whom he has become the darling, has made
+Mr. Stevenson complacent, and he always tended perhaps to be a thought
+too fond of his velvet coat. There is danger in the delight with which
+his every scrap is now received. A few years ago, when he was his own
+severest and sanest critic, he stopped the publication of a book after
+it was in proof--a brave act. He has lost this courage, or he would
+have rewritten "The Black Arrow." There is deterioration in the essays
+he has been contributing to an American magazine, graceful and
+suggestive though they are. The most charming of living stylists, Mr.
+Stevenson is self-conscious in all his books now and again, but
+hitherto it has been the self-consciousness of an artist with severe
+critics at his shoulder. It has become self-satisfaction. The critics
+have put a giant's robe on him, and he has not flung it off. He
+dismisses "Tom Jones" with a simper. Personally Thackeray "scarce
+appeals to us as the ideal gentleman; if there were nothing else [what
+else is there?], perpetual nosing after snobbery at least suggests the
+snob." From Mr. Stevenson one would not have expected the revival of
+this silly charge, which makes a cabbage of every man who writes about
+cabbages. I shall say no more of these ill-considered papers, though
+the sneers at Fielding call for indignant remonstrance, beyond
+expressing a hope that they lie buried between magazine covers. Mr.
+Stevenson has reached the critical point in his career, and one would
+like to see him back at Bournemouth, writing within high walls. We want
+that big book; we think he is capable of it, and so we cannot afford to
+let him drift into the seaweed. About the writer with whom his name is
+so often absurdly linked we feel differently. It is as foolish to rail
+at Mr. Rider Haggard's complacency as it would be to blame Christopher
+Sly for so quickly believing that he was born a lord.
+
+The key-note of all Mr. Stevenson's writings is his indifference, so
+far as his books are concerned, to the affairs of life and death on
+which their minds are chiefly set. Whether man has an immortal soul
+interests him as an artist not a whit: what is to come of man troubles
+him as little as where man came from. He is a warm, genial writer, yet
+this is so strange as to seem inhuman. His philosophy is that we are
+but as the light-hearted birds. This is our moment of being; let us
+play the intoxicating game of life beautifully, artistically, before we
+fall dead from the tree. We all know it is only in his books that Mr.
+Stevenson can live this life. The cry is to arms; spears glisten in the
+sun; see the brave bark riding joyously on the waves, the black flag,
+the dash of red color twisting round a mountain-side. Alas! the drummer
+lies on a couch beating his drum. It is a pathetic picture, less true
+to fact now, one rejoices to know, than it was recently. A common
+theory is that Mr. Stevenson dreams an ideal life to escape from his
+own sufferings. This sentimental plea suits very well. The noticeable
+thing, however, is that the grotesque, the uncanny, holds his soul; his
+brain will only follow a colored clew. The result is that he is chiefly
+picturesque, and, to those who want more than art for art's sake, never
+satisfying. Fascinating as his verses are, artless in the perfection of
+art, they take no reader a step forward. The children of whom he sings
+so sweetly are cherubs without souls. It is not in poetry that Mr.
+Stevenson will give the great book to the world, nor will it, I think,
+be in the form of essays. Of late he has done nothing quite so fine as
+"Virginibus Puerisque," though most of his essays are gardens in which
+grow few weeds. Quaint in matter as in treatment, they are the best
+strictly literary essays of the day, and their mixture of tenderness
+with humor suggests Charles Lamb. Some think Mr. Stevenson's essays
+equal to Lamb's, or greater. To that I say, no. The name of Lamb will
+for many a year bring proud tears to English eyes. Here was a man, weak
+like the rest of us, who kept his sorrows to himself. Life to him was
+not among the trees. He had loved and lost. Grief laid a heavy hand on
+his brave brow. Dark were his nights; horrid shadows in the house;
+sudden terrors; the heart stops beating waiting for a footstep. At that
+door comes Tragedy, knocking at all hours. Was Lamb dismayed? The
+tragedy of his life was not drear to him. It was wound round those who
+were dearest to him; it let him know that life has a glory even at its
+saddest, that humor and pathos clasp hands, that loved ones are drawn
+nearer, and the soul strengthened in the presence of anguish, pain, and
+death. When Lamb sat down to write, he did not pull down his blind on
+all that is greatest, if most awful, in human life. He was gentle,
+kindly; but he did not play at pretending that there is no cemetery
+round the corner. In Mr. Stevenson's exquisite essays one looks in vain
+for the great heart that palpitates through the pages of Charles Lamb.
+
+The great work, if we are not to be disappointed, will be fiction. Mr.
+Stevenson is said to feel this himself, and, as I understand, "Harry
+Shovel" will be his biggest bid for fame. It is to be, broadly
+speaking, a nineteenth-century "Peregrine Pickle," dashed with
+Meredith, and this in the teeth of many admirers who maintain that the
+best of the author is Scottish. Mr. Stevenson, however, knows what he
+is about. Critics have said enthusiastically--for it is difficult to
+write of Mr. Stevenson without enthusiasm--that Alan Breck is as good
+as anything in Scott. Alan Breck is certainly a masterpiece, quite
+worthy of the greatest of all story-tellers, who, nevertheless, it
+should be remembered, created these rich side characters by the score,
+another before dinner-time. English critics have taken Alan to their
+hearts, and appreciate him thoroughly; the reason, no doubt, being that
+he is the character whom England acknowledges as the Scottish type. The
+Highlands, which are Scotland to the same extent as Northumberland is
+England, present such a character to this day, but no deep knowledge of
+Mr. Stevenson's native country was required to reproduce him. An
+artistic Englishman or American could have done it. Scottish religion,
+I think, Mr. Stevenson has never understood, except as the outsider
+misunderstands it. He thinks it hard because there are no colored
+windows. "The color of Scotland has entered into him altogether," says
+Mr. James, who, we gather, conceives in Edinburgh Castle a place where
+tartans glisten in the sun, while rocks re-echo bagpipes. Mr. James is
+right in a way. It is the tartan, the claymore, the cry that the
+heather is on fire, that are Scotland to Mr. Stevenson. But the
+Scotland of our day is not a country rich in color; a sombre gray
+prevails. Thus, though Mr. Stevenson's best romance is Scottish, that
+is only, I think, because of his extraordinary aptitude for the
+picturesque. Give him any period in any country that is romantic, and
+he will soon steep himself in the kind of knowledge he can best turn to
+account. Adventures suit him best, the ladies being left behind; and so
+long as he is in fettle it matters little whether the scene be Scotland
+or Spain. The great thing is that he should now give to one ambitious
+book the time in which he has hitherto written half a dozen small ones.
+He will have to take existence a little more seriously--to weave
+broadcloth instead of lace.
+
+
+
+
+REV. WALTER C. SMITH, D.D.
+
+
+
+
+XI.
+
+REV. WALTER C. SMITH, D.D.
+
+
+During the four winters another and I were in Edinburgh, we never
+entered any but Free churches. This seems to have been less on account
+of a scorn for other denominations than because we never thought of
+them. We felt sorry for the "men" who knew no better than to claim to
+be on the side of Dr. Macgregor. Even our Free kirks were limited to
+two, St. George's and the Free High. After all, we must have been
+liberally minded beyond most of our fellows, for, as a rule, those who
+frequented one of these churches shook their heads at the other. It is
+said that Dr. Whyte and Dr. Smith have a great appreciation of each
+other. They, too, are liberally minded.
+
+To contrast the two leading Free Church ministers in Edinburgh as they
+struck a student would be to become a boy again. The one is always
+ready to go on fire, and the other is sometimes at hand with a jug of
+cold water. Dr. Smith counts a hundred before he starts, while the
+minister of Free St. George's is off at once at a gallop, and would
+always arrive first at his destination if he had not sometimes to turn
+back. He is not only a Gladstonian, but Gladstonian; his enthusiasm
+carries him on as steam drives the engine. Dr. Smith being a critic,
+with a faculty of satire, what would rouse the one man makes the other
+smile. Dr. Whyte judges you as you are at the moment; Dr. Smith sees
+what you will be like to-morrow. Some years ago the defeated side in a
+great Assembly fight met at a breakfast to reason itself into a belief
+that it had gained a remarkable moral victory. Dr. Whyte and Dr. Smith
+were both present, and the former was so inspiriting that the breakfast
+became a scene of enthusiasm. Then Dr. Smith arose and made a remark
+about a company of Mark Tapleys--after which the meeting broke up.
+
+I have a curious reminiscence of the student who most frequently
+accompanied me to church in Edinburgh. One Sunday when we were on our
+way up slushy Bath Street to Free St. George's he discovered that he
+had not a penny for the plate. I suggested to him to give twopence next
+time; but no, he turned back to our lodgings for the penny. Some time
+afterward he found himself in the same position when we were nearing
+the Free High. "I'll give twopence next time," he said cheerfully. I
+have thought this over since then, and wondered if there was anything
+in it.
+
+The most glorious privilege of the old is to assist the young. The two
+ministers who are among the chief pillars of the Free Church in
+Edinburgh are not old yet, but they have had a long experience, and the
+strength and encouragement they have been to the young is the grand
+outstanding fact of their ministries. Their influence is, of course,
+chiefly noticeable in the divinity men, who make their Bible classes so
+remarkable. There is a sort of Freemasonry among the men who have come
+under the influence of Dr. Smith. It seems to have steadied them--to
+have given them wise rules of life that have taken the noise out of
+them, and left them undemonstrative, quiet, determined. You will have
+little difficulty, as a rule, in picking out Dr. Smith's men, whether
+in the pulpit or in private. They have his mark, as the Rugby boys were
+marked by Dr. Arnold. Even in speaking of him, they seldom talk in
+superlatives: only a light comes into their eye, and you realize what a
+well-founded reverence is. I met lately in London an Irishman who, when
+the conversation turned to Scotland, asked what Edinburgh was doing
+without Dr. Smith (who was in America at the time). He talked with such
+obvious knowledge of Dr. Smith's teaching, and with such affection for
+the man, that by and by we were surprised to hear that he had never
+heard him preach nor read a line of his works. He explained that he
+knew intimately two men who looked upon their Sundays in the Free High,
+and still more upon their private talks with the minister, as the
+turning-point in their lives. They were such fine fellows, and they
+were so sure that they owed their development to Dr. Smith, that to
+know the followers was to know something of the master. This it is to
+be a touchstone to young men.
+
+There are those who think Dr. Smith the poet of higher account than Dr.
+Smith the preacher. I do not agree with them, though there can be no
+question that the author of "Olrig Grange" and Mr. Alexander Anderson
+are the two men now in Edinburgh who have (at times) the divine
+afflatus. "Surfaceman" is a true son of Burns. Of him it may be said,
+as it never can be said of Dr. Smith, that he sings because he must.
+His thoughts run in harmonious numbers. The author of "Olrig Grange" is
+the stronger mind, however, and his lines are always pregnant of
+meaning. He is of the school of Mr. Lewis Morris, but an immeasurably
+higher intellect if not so fine an artist: indeed, though there are
+hundreds of his pages that are not poetry, there are almost none that
+could not be rewritten into weighty prose. Sound is never his sole
+object. Good novels in verse are a mistake, for it is quite certain
+they would be better in prose. The novelist has a great deal to say
+that cannot be said naturally in rhythm, and much of Dr. Smith's blank
+verse is good prose in frills. It is driven into an undeserved
+confinement.
+
+The privilege of critics is to get twelve or twenty minor poets in a
+row, and then blow them all over at once. I remember one who despatched
+Dr. Smith with a verse from the book under treatment. Dr. Smith writes
+of a poet's verses, "There is no sacred fire in them, Nor much of
+homely sense and shrewd;" and when the critic came to these lines he
+stopped reading: he declared that Dr. Smith had passed judgment on
+himself. This is a familiar form of criticism, but in the present case
+it had at least the demerit of being false. There is so much sacred
+fire about Dr. Smith's best poetry that it is what makes him a poet;
+and as for "homely sense and shrewd," he has simply more of it than any
+contemporary writer of verse. It is what gives heart to his satire, and
+keeps him from wounding merely for the pleasure of drawing blood. In
+conjunction with the sacred fire, the noble indignation that mean
+things should be, the insight into the tragic, it is what makes "Hilda"
+his greatest poem. Without it there could not be pathos, which is
+concerned with little things; nor humor, nor, indeed, the flash into
+men and things that makes such a poem as "Dr. Linkletter's Scholar" as
+true as life, as sad as death. If only for the sake of that noble piece
+of writing, every Scottish student should have "North-Country Folk" in
+his possession. The poem is probably the most noteworthy thing that has
+been said of northern university life.
+
+
+
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+
+
+Transcriber's note:
+
+Minor punctuation errors were corrected.
+
+The following typographical errors were corrected:
+
+Page 50: Changed Calderwod to Calderwood.
+
+Page 111: Changed civiliaztion to civilization.
+
+Page 128: Changed litle to little.
+
+
+
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