diff options
Diffstat (limited to '40001-8.txt')
| -rw-r--r-- | 40001-8.txt | 5043 |
1 files changed, 0 insertions, 5043 deletions
diff --git a/40001-8.txt b/40001-8.txt deleted file mode 100644 index 674d07a..0000000 --- a/40001-8.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,5043 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg EBook of An English Girl's First Impressions of -Burmah, by Beth Ellis - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with -almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or -re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included -with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org/license - - -Title: An English Girl's First Impressions of Burmah - -Author: Beth Ellis - -Release Date: June 16, 2012 [EBook #40001] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK AN ENGLISH GIRL'S FIRST *** - - - - -Produced by sp1nd, Martin Pettit and the Online Distributed -Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was -produced from images generously made available by The -Internet Archive) - - - - - - -AN ENGLISH GIRL'S FIRST IMPRESSIONS OF BURMAH. - -BY -BETH ELLIS. - -"'TIS TRUE 'TIS STRANGE, BUT TRUTH IS -ALWAYS STRANGE; STRANGER SOMETIMES -THAN FICTION." - -Wigan: -R. PLATT, 17, WALLGATE. - -London: -SIMPKIN, MARSHALL, HAMILTON, KENT & CO., LTD. - -1899. - - -[Illustration: EASTWARD HO! - -PASSING THROUGH THE SUEZ CANAL] - - -DEDICATED - -TO - -T. E. - - - - -ILLUSTRATIONS. - - -Eastward Ho! _Frontispiece_ - - TO FACE PAGE -Elephant Moving Timber 32 - -Burmese Bullock Cart 84 - -Native Bazaar at Remyo 164 - -A Hpoongyi Kyaung 224 - - - - -CONTENTS. - - -_Chapter_ _Page_ - -I. THE VOYAGE 1 - -II. RANGOON 28 - -III. THE ROAD TO MANDALAY 46 - -IV. THE JOURNEY TO THE HILLS 61 - -V. AN UP-COUNTRY STATION 87 - -VI. THE EUROPEAN INHABITANTS 103 - -VII. THE BURMESE 142 - -VIII. ENTERTAINING 168 - -IX. ADVENTURES 178 - -X. BEASTS AND REPTILES 192 - -XI. SPORT 217 - -XII. THE RETURN 238 - - - - -INTRODUCTION. - - -_Towards the close of my visit to Burmah I was dining one night at a -friend's house in Rangoon, when my neighbour, a noted member of the I. -C. S. suddenly turned to me and asked me if it was my intention to write -a book. At my prompt reply in the negative he seemed astonished, and -asked, what then did I intend to do with my life? I had never looked at -the matter in that light before, and felt depressed. It has always been -my ambition to do at Rome as the Romans do, and if, as my questioner -clearly intimated, it was the custom for every casual visitor to the -Land of Pagodas either to write a book or to "do something with his -life," my duty seemed clear. I had no desire at all to undertake either -of the tasks, but as there was apparently no third course open to me, I -decided to choose the safer of the two, and write a book. So far so -good, but what to write about? I have considered the merits of -innumerable subjects, from the exploits of the old Greek heroes to green -Carnations, but each appears to have been appropriated by some earlier -author. The only subject which, so far as I can discover, has never -hitherto formed the theme of song or story, is Myself, and as that is a -subject about which I ought to know more than most folks and which has -always appeared to me to be intensely interesting, I have adopted it as -the theme of this, my first plunge into Literature._ - -[Illustration: Decoration] - - - - -CHAPTER I. - -THE VOYAGE. - - "Who spoke of things beyond my knowledge and showed me many things - I had never seen before." - - - "For to admire, and for to see, and for to behold - the world so wide."--(Rudyard Kipling.) - - -"I am not naturally a coward, except when I am afraid; at other times I -am as brave as a lion." - -It is an unfortunate state of existence, but such it is. From my -babyhood I have been known to my friends and relations as one who might -be confidently expected to behave in a most terror-stricken manner on -all occasions when no real danger threatened; but for myself, I have -always felt convinced that should I ever be brought face to face with -real danger, I should behave with a coolness and courage calculated to -win the unbounded admiration of all beholders. I say advisedly "of all -beholders," because, possibly, were no witnesses present, I might not -feel disposed to show so resolute a front to the danger! - -For example, in the case of a shipwreck, I can picture myself -presenting my life-belt to any one in distress, in the most -self-sacrificing manner, with the neatest little speech, quite worthy of -"Sir Philip Sidney" himself, and from some commanding post of vantage in -the rigging, haranguing the terrified passengers on the advisability of -keeping their heads. I feel sure that no power on earth would prevent me -from diving into the raging sea to rescue inexpert swimmers from a -watery death, were such an opportunity to present itself to me. - -And yet, if I am taken out of my depth, during a morning bathe, I am -paralysed with fear. Though a brave and expert swimmer in shallow water, -no sooner do I find myself out of reach of dry land, than all my powers -forsake me. I swim with short, irregular, and utterly ineffective -strokes, I pant, gasp and struggle, and unless promptly rescued, I sink. - -Or again, I can in imagination picture myself snatching little children -from under the hoofs of maddened horses, or with a plunge at the reins, -stopping them in the full force of their desperate career. - -But in reality I have never yet had sufficient courage to enter into -close intimacy with any horse, maddened or otherwise. Once, when I -wished to ingratiate myself in the eyes of the owner, I did venture to -pat a horse gingerly on the neck, well out of reach of mouth or heels, -but the animal shied away promptly, and I have never repeated the -experiment. - -Twice indeed, when a small girl, I was induced to mount to the saddle, -and then my expectations were not disappointed. Real danger stared me in -the face, and I was brave. When the horse, for some unaccountable -reason, pricked its ears, tossed its head, and began to trot, I did not -scream, I did not call for help, I merely grasped the pummel with one -hand, the saddle with the other, shut my eyes and waited for the end. -The end was sudden and somewhat painful. - -But in this matter-of-fact little England of ours there are few -opportunities, outside the yellow backed novel, of meeting with real -adventures. Picture then my delight when I received an invitation to -spend the winter in Burmah. I knew where Burmah was; that it was bounded -by Siam, China, and Tibet; anything was possible in a country with such -surroundings. I was charmed to go. - -Accordingly, I bought a great many unnecessary things, as is ever the -custom with inexperienced travellers, and started from Liverpool early -in November, my mind filled with dreams of tiger shooting, cobra -killing, dacoit hunting, and other venturesome deeds. - -After I had recovered from the effects of homesickness, brought on by my -first venture into the unknown world, and sea sickness brought on by the -Bay of Biscay, I found the ship a world of hitherto undreamt of -delights. I suppose the voyage was much the same as all other voyages, -but to me, naturally, it was full of enjoyments, wonders, and new -experiences. Everything was delightful, including the "Amusement -Committee" and "Baggage Days"; even coaling, I think, for the first -five minutes was full of interest. - -I have since been told that my fellow passengers were not uncommon -types, but to me they appeared the most wonderful and interesting beings -who ever lived in this work-a-day world. Certainly, none could have been -kinder to a lone, lorn female than were they. There were, of course, on -board several other passengers making their first voyage, young Indian -Civilians much advised and patronised by seniors of two years standing, -but these were of interest only as partners in games and dances. It was -in the real seasoned article, the self-satisfied, and immensely -kind-hearted Anglo-Indian, in whom I found my real interest. - -And they were all very good to me. Finding me young, ignorant, and eager -for information, they undertook my education, and taught me many things -which I did not know before, shedding new light on all subjects, from -"the only way to eat a banana," to the object of creation. - -I learned that India was created that the Indian Civilian might dwell -therein; the rest of mankind was created in order to admire the Indian -Civilian. Something of this sort I had already heard from my -brother-in-law, a member of that service, but one does not pay much -attention to what brothers-in-law say. - -Burmah, I discovered, is a land where teak grows, in order that the -"Bombay Burman" may go there and collect it. I have no very clear idea -as to what this "Bombay Burman" may be, but suppose him to be a member -of a society of men who uphold the principles of a late Prime Minister; -not political, but woodcraft. - -There are other dwellers in India and Burmah; indeed, one man proved to -me that the welfare of the British Constitution was solely dependent -upon the efficient condition of the Burmese police force, of which he -was an important member, but his arguments seemed to me a trifle -involved. On the whole, the other inhabitants of these countries seem to -be of little use or importance, unless perhaps it be to amuse and -entertain the Indian Civilian and the "Bombay Burman" in his leisure -hours. - -Further, I was instructed that Ceylon is a country in which dwell the -best (and the noisiest!) fellows in the world. They have innumerable -horse races, eat prawn curry, are prodigiously hospitable, and in odd -hours grow tea. - -My fellow passengers also filled my eager mind with stories of wonderful -adventure. Burmah, apparently, is crowded with tigers and wild -elephants, of a size and ferocity which filled me with fear. But as -every man on board appeared to have slain tigers and captured elephants -innumerable, and that under the most surprisingly dangerous -circumstances, I felt I should be well protected. - -I was also taught how to overcome a wild beast, should I chance to meet -with one when weaponless. - -A bear should cause but little anxiety; it is only necessary to hit him -violently over the nose; he will then stop and cry, and his victim will -escape. But beware! one man was so much amused at the bear's strange -cry that he laughed and forgot to run away. The bear killed him. - -When chased by an elephant the pursued should, I believe, climb up a -clump of feathery bamboos, where the beast cannot reach him. When I saw -a clump of feathery bamboos I rather wondered how anyone could climb it; -but all things are possible to one pursued. - -A tiger presents greater difficulties. If he doesn't run away when you -wave your arms and shout, you should poke your stick through his eye -into his brain, or get on his back, out of reach of his claws, and -throttle him. If that fails, pretend to be dead; if that even fails, you -must die. - -All this information I accepted gratefully and stored in my memory for -use when opportunity should arise. In the meantime I continued to enjoy -my voyage, and turned all my energies to mastering the science of -board-ship games. - -The one game which I never could play was "Bull." To me it seemed the -most foolish game ever invented. It is played by means of six flat -pads, about two inches in diameter, and a large sloping black board, -divided by thick white lines into twelve squares. Ten of these squares -are marked with numbers, the remaining two with "Bs." The object of the -player is to throw the pads on to the centre of the squares, avoiding -the lines, which count nothing, and above all avoiding the "Bs," which -count "minus ten." At the end of each turn the total of the numbers -scored is reckoned, and the highest score wins. - -In the "Bull" tournament I was drawn to play with a Mr. Rod, whom I did -not know, but who enjoyed the reputation of being an excellent player, -and very keen to win. One morning I was practising, and playing, if -possible, worse than usual, when I noticed a melancholy-looking man, -seated on a camp stool, watching my performance. I was struck by his -ever increasing sadness of expression, and enquired his name. - -He was Mr. Rod. - -In the tournament my score was minus twenty; I did not see him any more -during the voyage! - -I learned that one or two people had seen a worse "Bull" player than -myself. Her first three throws went overboard, the fourth went down an -air funnel, and the fifth upset an ink-stand, showering the contents -over an innocent spectator of the game. She never attempted to play -"Bull" again; it had made her so unpopular. - -Great indeed are the attractions of board-ship life on a first voyage. -The congenial companionship, the exhilarating outdoor life, the constant -succession of games, gaieties, and amusements, the novelty of every -thing, all tend to shed a halo over what, to the seasoned traveller, is -merely a period of utter boredom, to be dragged through with as little -ennui as possible. But the chief charm to me lay in the glimpse, though -only distant, of new lands, lands which had hitherto been merely -geographical or historical names, but which now acquired a new reality -and interest. - -The first few days we saw little of the land, but after the Bay was -passed, our course lay more inland, and we saw the coast of Spain and -Portugal, beautiful in the sunlight, red rocks and green slopes rising -up from a sea of deepest blue. - -Then appeared on the horizon a vague shadowy cloud, which we learned was -Africa. The first glimpse of a new continent, and a continent fraught -with such endless possibilities is impressive; and as we drew nearer, -and gazed on that dark range of wild, bare hills, I sympathised -thoroughly with a wee fellow-passenger who was discovered, full of -mingled hope and terror, looking eagerly at the dreary waste of land in -search of lions! - -Soon again we forgot all else, when, shaping our course round the south -of Spain, Gibraltar broke upon our view. What a wonder it is! that great -rugged rock, shaped on the northwest like a crouching lion, rising dark, -cold and solitary, amid the alien lands around it. Unmoved by the raging -seas beneath, it stands calm and defiant, a fit emblem of the nation to -which it belongs. Surely no Englishman can behold Gibraltar without -feeling proud of his nationality. - -We passed close to the north of Corsica, where the hills were covered -with snow, though it was still early winter. A dreary inhospitable -looking country is this: a fit birthplace for that iron-heart the First -Napoleon. - -We passed through the Straits of Messina by full moonlight, and never -have I beheld a scene of more fairylike beauty. The Sicilian coast -seemed (for all was vague and shadowy) to rise in gentle slopes from the -dark water, the land looked thickly wooded and well cultivated, and here -and there appeared the little white towns, nestling among trees and -vineyards, or perched beneath sheltering rocks, a peaceful and beautiful -paradise. On the Italian coast the scenery was a complete contrast, the -high, fierce hills stood up black and frowning against the clear sky, -the country was wild, dreary and desolate. This mingling of peaceful -homelike landscape, and weird rugged scenery, with the tender romance -of the moon shining on the still dark water, reminded me, somehow, of -Wagner's music; nothing else can so fitly represent the scene. - -Our course did not carry us very near to Crete, but we saw Mount Ida -rising beautiful and snow-crowned in the centre of a tumultuous land. -What scorn and pity this fair Mother Ida must feel for the miserable -dwellers at her feet! - -We stopped at Port Said for four hours. During the first two hours I was -charmed with the place; it seemed just like a big exhibition, everything -was so strange and unreal. The donkeys were delightful, the Turkish -traders so amusing, and shopping, when one has to bargain twenty minutes -over every article, and then toss up about the price, is certainly a new -experience. - -During the third hour I found that the heat, dust, and endless noise and -chatter were far from unreal. I had bought every conceivable thing that -I could not possibly want, and paid three times the proper price for it. -The Arabs ceased to be amusing; I was bored to tears. - -During the fourth hour I grew to hate the place and its inhabitants -with a deadly hatred, and could have kissed the ship in my delight at -returning to her, had she not been covered with coal dust. - -My first experience of the natives of Port Said was a long brown arm -coming through my porthole, feeling about for whatsoever valuable it -might find; a hearty smack with a hair brush caused it to retire -abruptly. The last I saw of them was a pompous trader thrown overboard -with all his wares, because he would not leave the ship when ordered. -His companions in their boat, I noticed, busily rescued the wares, but -seemed quite indifferent to the safety of the poor owner, whom they left -to struggle to shore as best he could. - -It is said that one would meet everyone sometime at Port Said if one -waited long enough; I would rather forego the meeting. - -The Canal, I believe, is generally regarded as an unmitigated nuisance, -and indeed, the slow progress and constant stoppages make the passage -through it a little wearisome, but on a first voyage its shores are most -interesting. On one side are several inland seas, and small collections -of the most wretched and impossible looking habitations that human -beings ever inhabited, with an occasional oasis of tall green palm -trees. From the east bank the desert stretches away apparently into -infinity. - -I was disappointed in the desert, though I hardly know what I expected; -I suppose the very emptiness and immensity detract from its -impressiveness; the human eye and mind cannot grasp them. We saw several -mirages and felt quite pleased with ourselves, though unconvinced that -they were not really oases in the desert; they were so very distinct. - -Some of the glimpses of native life on the banks were very amusing. At -one spot we met a camel, smiling the foolish irritating smile which is a -camel's characteristic, speeding away at an inelegant trot, and -distantly pursued by the owner and his friends; alas! we could not see -the end of the race. Camels, I was told, are unwearying beasts, so -perhaps, like "Charley's Aunt" this one is still running. - -We were greatly excited by one incident. A Dutch steamer passed us, and -we noticed on the deck a very pretty girl, evidently very much admired -by all the crew, and especially by one tall fine looking fellow who -seemed on very good terms with her. Shortly after the boat had passed, a -small steam launch hove into sight, on board of which were several men, -mostly Turkish officials. As they passed, the skipper of the launch -shouted various questions, and we gathered that "Mademoiselle" had run -away and they were in pursuit. Whether it was an elopement or merely an -escape from justice we never learned, but most of us adopted the former -view, and hoped that the guilty steamer would be out of the canal and -safe from pursuit, before the fussy little launch overtook it. - -We had a gorgeous sunset that night in the canal. The sky, every -conceivable shade of yellow, violet and crimson, was reflected in the -still waters of the canal and inland seas. The tall palm trees rose -darkest green against the brilliant sky, while the sand of the desert -glowed golden and salmon pink, fading in the distance to the palest -green; and all the colours were softened by a shadowy blue haze. I have -never seen more wonderful colouring. - -After passing Aden we steamed uninterruptedly for ten days with but -occasional glimpses of land; we had perfect weather, and the beauty of -everything was almost overpowering. - -I know not which hour of the day was the most exquisite: the early -morning, with the sun rising, a ball of fire, out of the sea, making -golden paths across the water, and the distant land blushing rosy red, -as it peered through the hazy blue curtains which o'erhung it; or the -full noonday, with the deep blue sky and the deep blue sea fading -together in a pale blue mist, till the world seems changed to a blue -ball, and we the only living things within it; or the evening, when the -western sky turned crimson and violet, and the sun, looking strangely -oval, went down into the sea behind a transparent green haze, while in -the east the crescent moon sailed silver in the blue-black sky; or the -night, when one lay alone on the upper deck, fanned by the soft night -breeze, soothed by the monotonous swish of the water, looking into the -unmeasured heights of the star-bespangled heavens or the impenetrable -depths of the waters beneath, where "there is neither speech nor -language: but their voices are heard among them," and the glory of God -is shown forth night and day. - -We had a fancy dress ball in the Red Sea: I suppose this is usual. Ours -was noted for the number of Japanese present. At least, I believe they -were intended to represent Japanese (the costumes had been bought at -Port Said as such), but as they were dressed chiefly in European evening -dress, partially covered by a flimsy Japanese dressing-gown, their -appearance was unique. - -I suffered a great deal on that occasion. I was a peasant, and as is -the custom of fancy dress peasants all the world over, I wore my hair in -a long plait down my back. - -When my first partner approached I looked up at him in the usual polite -and pleasing manner; he then seized my waist, plait included, in a firm -grip and we danced off together, I with my head forcibly fixed at an -angle such as is usually adopted by pictured good choir boys or "Souls -awakening." I endured it for a short time; but then I began to get a -stiff neck, and was obliged at last to ask my partner not to pull my -hair. Alas! he was a sensitively shy youth, and was so embarrassed at my -request that I felt I had committed an unpardonable fault. - -But I did not learn by experience: the same thing occurred with all my -partners, and as, after the first unfortunate attempt I did not like to -complain again, the agonies I suffered from the crick in my neck next -day can better be imagined than described. - -We stayed two days in Ceylon, but all attempts to describe this "Garden -of Eden" are futile. No one, who has not seen it, can hope to realise -the wonderful colouring of the place; the red roads, the red and white -houses, deep blue sky, and deep blue lakes; the brilliant dresses of the -natives, the large flaming red and blue flowers, the wonderful green of -the palms and other tropical plants, and above all, the beauty of that -long line of open coast, the great breakers glittering with a thousand -opal tints in the sunlight, and beyond them the dark blue ocean, -delicately flecked with shimmering white spray, stretching away into the -shadowy distance, "farther than sight can follow, farther than soul can -reach." - -We drove through the Cinnamon gardens, where the still air was heavy -with the delicious scent, and out to Mount Lavinia, where, of course, we -ate prawn curry. Honestly, I must confess that never before have I -tasted anything so truly horrible; but I pretended to like it immensely. -I suppose everybody does the same when first introduced to this -celebrated dish: it is what might be called "an accrued taste." - -I don't think the author of "From Greenland's Icy Mountains" can ever -have touched at Ceylon, or how could he have declared that "man is -vile"? The Singalese are the most beautiful people I have ever beheld, -while the European inhabitants are surely the most hospitable and -delightful in the world. - -Perhaps, when the poet wrote those lines, he had the Turkish traders in -his mind: they certainly are vile. One of them sold me a sixpenny -bracelet for ten shillings. They are exactly like the spider of noted -memory; they stand at the doors of their fascinating, dark, poky little -shops, persuading innocent passers by to enter, "only to look round;" -but if the poor victim once venture to "walk into their parlour," he -will be indeed clever if he escape without emptying his purse. - -"Rickshaws" are charming; I spent every spare minute riding about in -one. It is almost as adventurous and exciting as driving in a -Marseilles Fiacre, and far more comfortable. I feared I had met with an -adventure one day, for my "puller" (I don't know what else to call him) -ran away with me, and stopping in a lonely road, began to assure me that -I was a "handsome lady." I wondered what would happen next, but soon -discovered that he only wanted "Backsheesh," and assuming my very -sternest demeanour I repeated "don't bus" ("bus" to stop, being the only -word of the language I could remember) several times, and at last -induced him to take me back to my companions. What a valuable thing is -presence of mind on such an occasion! - -It was shortly after leaving Ceylon that our first real adventure befell -us. We had all retired early to bed, being weary with the long day on -shore; the clatter of tongues and tramp of feet on deck had ceased, and -all was silent save for the throbbing of the engines, and the quiet -movements of the men on watch. - -Suddenly I was awakened by a hurried murmur of voices in the next cabin, -then an electric bell rang and I was terrified to hear the cry: "Fire! -Fire!" - -I sprang up, flung on a cloak, and rushed out into the "Alley Way," -which speedily became the scene of the wildest confusion. - -All the cabin doors opened, and the occupants hurried confusedly out, -arrayed in the first garments that came to hand, asking eager questions, -and giving wild explanations. - -Brave men, anxious to be of use, snatched children from their mothers' -arms, while the distracted mothers, having but a vague notion as to what -was happening, supposed the boat to have been boarded by pirates or -kidnappers, and fought fiercely to regain possession of their infants. - -Those who prided themselves on their presence of mind, ran up and down -with small water bottles to fling on the flames, or tried to organise a -bucket line. Others endeavoured to tie as many life-belts as possible to -themselves and their friends, fastening them to any part of their -persons most easily convenient. - -One matter-of-fact old lady began to collect cloaks, biscuits, and -valuables from her trunk, preparatory to being cast ashore on a desert -island, while another proceeded to wrap herself from head to foot in -blankets, having heard that these offer a good resistance to the spread -of the flames. Some were too terrified to do aught but scream, but the -majority were full of self-sacrifice and bravery, and fell over, and -interfered with one another woefully, in their endeavour to be of -assistance to whomsoever might require their services. - -Meanwhile the original causes of the alarm--two girls who shared the -cabin next to mine--did not for an instant cease their efforts. One, -with a fortitude worthy of Casabianca himself, stood firmly with a -finger pressed upon the button of the electric bell, determined to die -rather than leave her post, while the other fought her way wildly up the -passage, turning a deaf ear to all questions, and merely continuing to -reiterate her cry of: "Fire! Steward! Fire!" - -At length (I suppose, in reality, in about three minutes after the -first alarm, but it seemed a far longer time) a sleepy and much -astonished steward appeared, and as soon as he could make himself heard, -demanded the cause of the uproar. When eagerly assured that the deck was -on fire over our heads, that in five minutes we should all be cinders -unless we instantly took to the boats, and that the whole affair was a -disgrace to the Company, and the "Times" should be written to if the -speaker (an irascible "Globe trotter") survived the disaster, the -steward stolidly denied the existence of any fire at all and -explanations ensued. - -It was then discovered that signal rockets had been sent up from the -deck to a signal station we were passing, and some of the sparks having -blown into the porthole of the girls' cabin, the occupants had concluded -that the deck was on fire, and had given the alarm. - -It took some time to make the fact of the mistake clear to everyone, but -the steward at last succeeded in allaying all fears, and we returned to -our cabins, feeling indignant and somewhat foolish, and perhaps a little -disappointed (now that the danger was over) that our adventure had -turned out so tamely. - -On the following morning the Captain organised an imposing ceremony on -the upper deck, and solemnly presented two sham medals to the heroines -of the preceding night's adventure, thanking them for their presence of -mind, and noble efforts to save the burning ship! - -The remainder of the voyage passed without incident, and we arrived -safely at our destination about six o'clock one lovely Friday morning. -The sun was just rising as we sailed up the river, tinting the brown -water and the green banks of the Irrawaddy with a rosy light. Rangoon, a -vast collection of brown and white houses, mills, towers, chimneys, and -cupolas, in a nest of green, showed faintly through the blue haze; and -rising high above a grove of waving dark green palm trees, glittered the -golden dome of a pagoda, the first object clearly distinguishable on -shore, to welcome us to this country so rightly termed "The Land of -Pagodas." - -[Illustration: Decoration] - - - - -CHAPTER II. - -RANGOON. - - "Oh! the Land of Pagodas and Paddy fields green, - Is Burmah, dear Burmah you know." - - -This is not a book on "Burmah," but an account of my impressions of -Burmah; therefore, for all matters concerning which I had no original -impressions, such as its history, its public buildings, the scenery, the -life and condition of the natives, its resources, and its future, I -refer both the gentle and ungentle reader to the many books on the -subject which have appeared during the past few years. - -My first and last impression of Rangoon was heat. Not ordinary honest, -hot, heat, such as one meets with at Marseilles or in the heart of the -desert, wherever that may be; not even a stuffy heat, such as one -encounters in church, but a damp, clinging, unstable sort of heat, which -makes one long for a bath, if it were not too much trouble to get into -it. - -I remember in my youth placing one of my sister's wax dolls (mine were -all wooden, as I was of a destructive nature) to sit before the fire one -cold winter's day; I remember dollie was somewhat disfigured ever -afterwards. - -The remembrance of that doll haunted me during my stay in Rangoon; I -felt I could deeply sympathise with, and thoroughly understand her -feelings on that occasion; and for the first two or three hours, -remembering the effect the heat had upon her appearance, I found myself -frequently feeling my features to discover whether they still retained -their original form and beauty. But after a few hours I became resigned; -all I desired was to melt away quickly and quietly, and have done with -it. - -At first I looked upon the "Punkah" as a nuisance, its unceasing -movement irritated me, it ruffled my hair, and I invariably bumped my -head against it on rising. But after enduring one long Punkahless -half-hour, I came to look on it as the one thing that made life -bearable, and the "Punkah-wallah" as the greatest benefactor of -mankind. - - -In the early mornings and evenings I became, hardly cooler, but what -might be described as firmer, and it was at these times that the -wonderful sights of Rangoon were displayed to my admiring gaze. - - -I saw the celebrated "Schwee Dagon Pagoda" with its magnificent towering -golden dome, surmounted by the beautiful gold and jewelled "Htee;" the -innumerable shrines, images, cupolas, and pagodas at its base, the -curious mixture of tawdry decorations and wonderful wood carvings -everywhere visible, and the exquisite blending and intermingling of -colours in the bright dresses of the natives, who crowd daily to offer -their gifts at this most holy shrine. It is quite futile to attempt -description of such a place; words cannot depict form and colour -satisfactorily, least of all convey to those who have not themselves -beheld it, a conception of the imposing beauty of this world famed -Pagoda. - -The Burmese are a most devout people; the great flight of steps leading -to the Pagoda is worn by the tread of many feet, and every day the place -is crowded with worshippers. - -They begin young. I saw one wee baby, scarcely more than a year old, -brought by his father to learn to make his offering at the shrine of -Buddha. The father with difficulty balanced the little fellow in a -kneeling position before a shrine, with the tiny brown hands raised in a -supplicating attitude, and then retired a few steps to watch. Instantly -the baby overbalanced and toppled forward on its face. He was picked up -and placed in his former position, only to tumble down again when left. -This performance was repeated about five times; the father never seemed -to notice the humour of the situation--the baby certainly did not. - -One of the most interesting sights of Rangoon is that of the elephants. -Ostensibly their work is to pile timber ready for embarkation on the -river, but evidently they consider that they exist and work in order to -be admired by all who pay them a visit. - -And well they deserve admiration! They go about their duties in a -stately, leisurely manner, lifting the logs with trunk, tusks, and -forefeet; piling them up with a push here, a pull there, and then -marching to the end of the pile and contemplating the result with their -heads on one side, to see if all are straight and firm. And they do all -in such a stately, royal manner, that they give an air of dignity to the -menial work, and one comes away with the feeling that to pile teak side -by side with an elephant would be an honour worth living for. - -During my peregrinations round the town I was taken to see the home of -the Indian Civilian, a huge imposing building, with such an air of -awe-inspiring importance about every stick and stone, that none save -those initiated into the secrets of the place, may enter without feeling -deeply honoured by the permission to do so. Even a "Bombay Burman" could -hardly approach, without losing some of his natural hardihood. - -[Illustration: ELEPHANT MOVING TIMBER] - -It may have been the awe with which this building inspired me, it may -have been my visit to the Pagoda, with its air of mysticism and unknown -possibilities, but when I retired to my large dimly lighted bed-room -after my first day's wanderings in Rangoon, my natural courage forsook -me, and I became the prey to a fit of appalling terrors. - -All the ghostly stories I had ever read of the spiritualism of the East, -of the mystic powers of "Thugs," "Vampires" and other unpleasant beings, -returned to my mind. - -For some time I could not sleep, and when at last I did sink into an -uneasy doze I was haunted by nightmares of ghostly apparitions, and -powerful and revengeful images of Gaudama. - -Suddenly I awoke with the feeling that something, I knew not what, had -roused me from my uneasy slumber. And then, as I lay trembling and -listening, out of darkness came a Voice, weird, uncanny, which exclaimed -in solemn tones the mystic word "Tuctoo." - -What could it be? Was I one destined to learn deep secrets of the -mystic world? Had the spirit, if spirit it were, some great truth to -make known to me? if so, what a pity it did not speak English! - -"Tuctoo" remarked the voice again, this time rather impatiently. - -I racked my brains to think of a possible meaning for this mysterious -word, but all in vain, I could understand nothing. - -"Tuctoo, tuctoo, tuctoo," it continued. - -And then, out of the darkness came another voice, an angry English -voice, loud in its righteous indignation, the voice of my host. - -"Shut up you beast," he cried, and perhaps he added one or two more -words suited to the occasion. I lay down and tried to pretend that I had -not been frightened, and in doing so, fell asleep. I was introduced to -the "Tuctoo" next day, but did not consider him a pleasant acquaintance. -He is a lizard about a foot long, with a large red mouth, and a long -wriggling tail; he reminded me of a baby alligator. He dwells on the -inner walls of houses, and his presence in a house is supposed to bring -good luck, but his tiresome habit of "tuctooing" in a most human voice -at all hours of the day or night make him rather unpopular. We chased -him down the wall with a long "Shan" spear and caught him in a towel, -but he looked so very pugnacious that we did not detain him from his -business. - -Of course the most important element of life in Rangoon, in fact in all -Burmah, is the Gymkhana. - -Apparently, the European population in Rangoon exists solely in order to -go to the Gymkhana. It attracts like a magnet. People may not intend to -go there when they set out, but no matter how far afield they go, sooner -or later in the evening they are bound to appear at the Gymkhana. If -they did not go there in the daytime they would inevitably walk there in -their sleep. - -This renowned Gymkhana is situate in the Halpin Road (pronounced -"Hairpin," which is confusing to the uninitiated) and is a large, open, -much verandaed, wooden building. Of the lower story, sacred to the male -sex, I caught only a hurried glimpse in passing, and the impression left -on my mind was a confusion of long men, reclining in long chairs, with -long drinks. - -On my first visit to the upper regions, I fancied myself in a private -lunatic asylum, for there, in a large room built for the purpose, were -numbers of men and women, to all other appearances perfectly sane, -waltzing round and round to the inspiriting music of the military band; -dancing, in ordinary afternoon attire, not languidly, but vigorously and -enthusiastically, and that in a temperature such as Shadrach, Meshech -and Abednego never dreamed of. - -But I soon discovered that there was method in this madness, for the -heat, when dancing, was so unspeakably awful that to sit still seemed -quite cool in contrast, and it was worth the sufferings of the dance to -feel cool afterwards, if only in imagination. - -In another room of the Gymkhana the ladies assemble to read their -favourite magazines, or to glower from afar upon the early birds who -have already appropriated them. - -And here I must pause to say a word in deprecation of the accusations -of gossip and scandal, which are so frequently launched against the -Anglo-Indian ladies. Not that I would for the world deny the existence -of scandal, but what I wish to emphasise is, that the Anglo-Indians (at -least those of the female sex) do not invent or repeat scandalous -stories from pure love of the thing, nor from any desire to injure the -characters of their neighbours. They are forced to do so by -circumstances. - -For example, Mrs. A. arrives early at the Gymkhana, appropriates the -newly arrived number of the "Gentlewoman," and seating herself -comfortably in a good light, sets to work to read the paper from -beginning to end. - -But soon Mrs. B. appears upon the scene, and alas! Mrs. B. has also come -to the Gymkhana with the intention of reading from beginning to end the -newly arrived number of the "Gentlewoman"; and, being human, Mrs. B., on -finding her favourite paper already appropriated, is filled with a -distaste for all other papers, and a consuming desire to read "The -Gentlewoman," and "The Gentlewoman" only. If she cannot procure the -paper right speedily, life holds no more happiness for her. - -But alas, Mrs. A. shows no intention of relinquishing her possession of -the paper for many hours. In vain does Mrs. B. spread "Punch," -"Graphic," or "Sketch," temptingly before Mrs. A's abstracted eyes, she -is not to be influenced by honest means. Then Mrs. B. has only one -course left to her, and adopts it. - -First she seeks and obtains an assistant to the scheme, Mrs. C. The two -ladies then draw near Mrs. A. (who tightens her hold on the paper as -they approach) and seat themselves on either side of their victim. - -Mrs. C., assuming an expression of sweet innocence, entirely disguising -the craft of her intentions, pretends to be deeply interested in last -week's "Gazette," hoping thereby to demonstrate her lack of interest in -fashion papers; Mrs. B. entices Mrs. A. into conversation. - -After a few desultory remarks, during which the aggressor still clings -to her prey, Mrs. B., throwing a warning glance at Mrs. C. to prepare -her, says in a voice fraught with deep mystery: - -"Were you not astonished to hear of so and so's engagement last week?" - -No, Mrs. A. was not particularly astonished. - -But surely Mrs. A. had heard that strange story about so and so's -behaviour towards somebody else? - -Curious, Mrs. A. had not heard of it. - -Of course Mrs. B. would not mention it to anyone else, but Mrs. A., as -every one knows, can be trusted, and really it was so strange. - -Then calling to her aid all her powers of imagination, Mrs. B. proceeds -to relate some astounding invention concerning so and so. Gradually, as -she becomes more interested in the recital, Mrs. A's. fingers relax -their hold on the precious paper, and at last it is dropped, forgotten, -upon the table. - -Now it is Mrs. C's. turn. In the most careless manner she draws the -"Gentlewoman" slowly towards her, until it is out of reach of Mrs. A., -when she snatches it up eagerly, and retires to another table, where she -is soon joined by the triumphant Mrs. B. - -Then poor Mrs. A., deprived of her newspaper must needs seek another -one, but alas? they are all in use. Nothing remains for her to do but to -imitate Mrs. B's conduct, and attract Mrs. D's attention from the paper -she is reading, by repeating to her the story she has just heard, adding -whatever new details may appear to her as most likely to arouse Mrs. -D's. interest. And so the snowball grows. - -Thus it will be clear to all that the accusations are unfair, seeing -that the gossip indulged in by the ladies at the Gymkhana is merely the -outcome of circumstances, inventions being notoriously the children of -necessity. It is obvious that were each lady in Burmah provided with -every magazine and paper that her heart could desire, gossip would -speedily cease to exist,--in the Ladies' Clubs. - -The most extraordinary vehicle that ever existed is the Rangoon "ticca -gharry." For inconvenience, discomfort, and danger, it has never been -surpassed. It has been excellently described as "a wooden packing case -on wheels." I suppose it is a distant and unfashionable relation of the -modern four wheeler, with wooden shutters in place of windows; very -narrow, noisy, and uncomfortable. It is usually drawn by a long-tailed, -ungroomed and brainless Burman pony, and is driven by one of the most -extraordinary race of men that ever existed. - -The "Gharry Wallah's" appearance--but it is scarce meet to describe his -appearance to the gentle reader; we will say his appearance is unusual. -His mind and character have gained him his well earned right to be -counted among the eccentricities of the age. He is sublime in his utter -indifference to the world at large, in the cheerful manner in which he -will drive, through, into, or over anything he happens to meet. - -But his most noted characteristic is utter indifference to the wishes -of his "fare." - -I have often wondered what are the secret workings of the "Gharry -Wallah's" mind. He cannot imagine, (no man, intelligent or otherwise, -could imagine) that a human being drives in a "gharry" for the pure -enjoyment of the thing; and yet he never seems to consider that his -"fare" may desire to go to any particular destination. 'Tis vain to -explain at great length, and with many forcible gestures, where one -wishes to go; "he hears but heeds it not." The instant one enters the -vehicle he begins to drive at a great rate in whatever direction first -comes into his mind. He continues to drive in that direction until -stopped, when he cheerfully turns round and drives another way, any way -but the right one. - -No one has yet discovered where he would eventually drive to; many have -had the curiosity but none the fortitude to undertake original research -into the matter. - -It is presumed that, unless stopped, he would drive straight on till he -died of starvation. - -Occasionally, by a judicious waving of umbrellas it may be possible to -direct his course, but that only in the case of a very young driver. I -have sometimes wondered whether perchance the pony may be the sinner, -and the driver merely an innocent and unwilling accomplice. I cannot -tell. - -But this I can say, if you crave for danger, if you seek penance, drive -in a "ticca gharry," but if you desire to reach any particular -destination in this century, don't. - -With the exception of a few leisure hours spent at the Gymkhana, the -ladies of Rangoon devote their time and energy to writing "Chits." - -At first I was filled with a great wonder as to what might be the nature -of these mysterious "Chits." I would be sitting peacefully talking with -my hostess in the morning, when suddenly, a look of supreme unrest and -anxiety comes over her face: "Excuse me, a moment" she exclaims, "I must -just go and write a chit." - -She then hastens to her writing table, rapidly scribbles a few words, -gives the paper to a servant, and then returns to me with an expression -of relief and contentment. - -But scarce five minutes have elapsed, ere the look of anxiety again -returns; again she writes a "chit," and again becomes relieved and -cheerful, and so on throughout the day. - -And this, I discovered was the case with nearly every European lady in -the country. I suppose it must be some malady engendered by the climate, -only to be relieved by the incessant inditing of "chits." I myself never -suffered from the ailment, but should doubtless have fallen a victim had -I remained longer in the country. - -The contents and destination of these "chits" seem to be of little or no -importance; so long as notes be written and despatched at intervals of -ten minutes or so during the day, that is sufficient. What finally -becomes of these "chits" I cannot pretend to say; whether they are -merely taken away and burnt, or whether they have some place in the -scheme of creation, I never discovered. - -Nor do I know whether the male population suffers from the same malady. -Does the Indian Civilian, seated in his luxurious chamber in that -awe-inspiring building of his, does he too spend his life in writing -"chits"? Does the "Bombay Burman," in some far off jungle, "alone with -nature undisturbed," does he too sit down 'neath the shade of the -feathery bamboo, or the all embracing Peepul tree, and write and -despatch "chits" to imaginary people, in imaginary houses, in an -imaginary town? - -I know not, it is futile to speculate further upon the matter. The -mystery of "chit" writing is too deep for me. - -I would gladly have remained longer in Rangoon, but it might not be. -Mine was no mere visit of pleasure; I had travelled to Burmah in search -of adventure, such as is scarcely to be met with in the garden party, -dinner party, and dance life of Rangoon. And so, one hot afternoon, with -anxious beating heart, I said "Good bye" to security and civilisation, -and set forth on my journey to Mandalay! - - - - -CHAPTER III. - -THE ROAD TO MANDALAY. - - "I travelled among unknown men, - In lands beyond the Sea."--(Wordsworth). - - - "Where the tints of the earth, and the hues of the sky, - In colour tho' varied, in beauty may vie."--(Byron). - - -The distance by rail from Rangoon to Mandalay is 386 miles, and it takes -twenty-two hours to accomplish the journey. Trains, like everything else -in this leisurely country, are not given to hurrying themselves. "Hasti, -hasti, always go hasti" is the motto for Burmah. As an example of the -unintelligible nature of the language I may explain that "Hasti" means -"slow!" - -It is a pleasant journey however, for the carriages are most -comfortable, and the scenery through which the rail passes affords -plenty of interest to a new comer. - -I enjoyed my journey, therefore, immensely. I left Rangoon about five -o'clock in the afternoon, well provided with books, fruit and chocolates -for the journey, and under the protection of a hideous Madrassee Ayah. - -I believe she was in reality a worthy old creature, but she was so -exceedingly ugly, so very unintelligible (though most persistent in her -efforts at conversation) and so intolerably stupid, that I could not -feel much affection for her, and I only consented to put up with her -company as a protection against the thieves who haunt the various -halting places along the line, ready to steal into carriages and carry -away all the portable property of the traveller. I had heard such blood -curdling stories of these train thieves that I should have felt quite -nervous about undertaking the journey, had I not fortunately disbelieved -them. - -I do not for an instant believe my ayah would have been any real -protection, for whenever we stopped she was seized with an overpowering -hunger, and spent all her time bargaining with the vendors of bananas, -huge red prawns, decayed fish, dried fruits, cakes, and other horrible -articles, who swarmed upon the stations. - -These delicacies, and others which she prevailed upon my tender heart -to buy for her, she wrapped up in a large red pocket handkerchief, and -hid under the seat; what was their final fate I cannot pretend to say, -but for her sake I trust she didn't eat them. - -She was a much travelled lady and had visited many of the towns along -the route, and persisted in waking me up at all odd hours of the night, -to point out the houses where her various Mem-Sahibs had lived, or the -bungalows inhabited by the commissioners, matters in which I was not at -all interested. - -She kept me awake with long rambling stories about her many relations, -stories which, as they were told in the most vague and unintelligible -"pigeon English" I found it very difficult to understand, but the gist -of all was that she was very old and very poor, and she was sure I was a -very kind and generous "Missie," and would not fail to reward her -handsomely for her services. - -I failed to discover what these same services might be, for beyond -fanning me vigorously when I did not require it, and at three o'clock in -the morning procuring me from somewhere an unpleasant mixture she called -coffee, and which I was obliged to throw secretly out of the window, she -did nothing except talk. I suppose she was really no worse than the rest -of her tribe, and cannot be blamed for getting as much as she could out -of her exceedingly innocent and easily humbugged "missie." - -At the first station at which we stopped, I was much astonished to see -all the natives on the platform come and kneel down in the humblest -manner round the door of my carriage, and remain there "shekkohing" and -pouring forth polite speeches in Burmese, until our train left the -station. - -I have never been backward in my high opinion of my own importance, but -I hardly expected the fame of my presence to have spread to this distant -land, and felt considerably embarrassed, though, of course, highly -gratified, by such unexpected tokens of respect. - -I received these attentions at every station with the most royal bows -and smiles, until at last, on dismounting from the train at the dining -station, I discovered that the carriage next to mine was occupied by a -noble Shan Chief and his retinue, and it was to him, not to my -insignificant person, that all this homage was paid. I felt quite -annoyed at the discovery. He was really such a hideous, yellow, dirty -old man, and he sat at the window, surrounded by his wives and -attendants, smoking grumpily, and paying not the least attention to the -flattering speech of his admirers, who must have been far more gratified -by my gracious condescension. - -The chief stared at me a great deal when I passed his window to re-enter -my carriage, and shortly after the train was again set in motion he sent -one of his wives to inspect me, possibly with a view to offering me a -position among the number of his dusky spouses. She opened the door, and -stared at me for some time, taking not the slightest notice of my -requests that she would withdraw, until she had sufficiently examined -me, when she retired as abruptly as she had appeared, and I lost no time -in securing the door behind her. - -Evidently her report was not satisfactory, for I have heard no more of -the episode. Possibly, she reported that I looked bad tempered; I -certainly felt so! - -What a fascinating journey that was. During the first part of the route -the country is less interesting, consisting merely of flat stretches of -Paddy fields and low jungle scrub. But all this I passed through by -night, when the soft moonlight lent a witching beauty to the scene. - -There is something so inexplicably beautiful about night in the east, so -comparatively cool, so clear, so quiet, and yet so full of mysterious -sound, - - - "A little noiseless noise among the leaves, - Born of the very sigh that silence heaves." - - -The cloudless heavens sparkle with a myriad stars, the moonlight seems -brighter and more golden than elsewhere, and the noisy, weary, worn old -earth hides away her tinsel shams and gaudiness, which the cruel -sunlight so pitilessly exposes, and appears grander and nobler under -night's kindly sway. - -The scenery in Upper Burmah is exceedingly fine. The great rocky hills, -each crowned with its pagoda, rise on all sides, stretching away into -the distance till they become only blue shadows. Everywhere are groves -of bananas and palm trees, forests of teak and bamboo, and vast tracks -of jungle, attired in the gayest colours. - -The pagodas, mostly in a half-ruined condition, are far more numerous -here than in Lower Burmah, and raise their white and golden heads from -every towering cleft of rock, and every mossy grove. As we neared -Mandalay we passed many groups of half-ruined shrines, images and -pagodas, covered with moss and creeper, deserted by the human beings who -erected them, and visited now only by the birds and other jungle folk, -who build their nests and make their homes in the shade of the once -gorgeous buildings. They look very picturesque, rising above the -tangled undergrowth that surrounds them, but pitifully lonely. - -We stopped at a great number of stations en route. The platforms were -always crowded with natives of every description, at all hours of the -day and night, selling their wares, greeting their friends, or smoking -contentedly, and viewing with complacency the busy scene. - -The natives of India, with their fierce sullen faces, frightened me; the -cunning Chinese, ever ready to drive a hard bargain, amused but did not -attract me; but the merry, friendly little Burmese were a continual -delight. - -They swaggered up and down in their picturesque costumes, smoking their -huge cheroots, the men regarding with self-satisfied and amused contempt -the noisy chattering crowd of Madrassees and Chinese, the women -coquetting in the most graceful and goodnatured way with everyone in -turn. When they had paid their devoirs to the old chief, they would -crowd round my carriage window offering their wares, taking either my -consent or refusal to be a purchaser as the greatest joke, and laughing -merrily at my vain attempts to understand them. - -I fell in love with them on the spot, they are such jolly people and -such thorough gentlefolk. - -It was very interesting in the early morning to watch the signs of -awakening life in the many Burmese villages through which we passed. To -see the caravans of bullock carts or mules setting out on their journey -to the neighbouring town, and the pretty little Burmese girls coquetting -with their admirers as they carried water from the well, or chattering -and whispering merrily together as they performed their toilet by the -stream, decking their hair with flowers and ribbons, and donning their -delicately coloured pink and green "tamehns." - -Here we met a procession of yellow-robed "hpoongyis" and their -followers, marching through the village with their begging bowls, to -give the villagers an opportunity of performing the meritorious duty of -feeding them. There a procession of men, women, and children walking -sedately towards a pagoda, with offerings of fruit or flowers; to -contemplate the image of the mighty Gaudama, to hear the reading of the -Word, and to meditate upon the Holy Life. Now we passed a group of -little hpoongyi pupils with their shaven crowns and yellow robes, -sitting solemnly round their teacher in the open-sided kyaung. Anon we -passed a jovial crew of merrymakers in their most brilliantly coloured -costumes, jogging along gaily behind their ambling bullocks, to some Pwé -or Pagoda Feast, which they are already enjoying in anticipation. - -And the strange part of it all is that nowhere does one see sorrow, -poverty, or suffering; outwardly at least, all is bright and happy. I -suppose the Burman must have his troubles like other folk, but if so he -hides them extremely well under a cheerful countenance. Surely in no -other inhabited country could we travel so far without beholding some -sign of misery. - -I think the great charm of Burmah lies in the happiness and brightness -of its people; their merriment is infectious, and they make others -happy by the mere sight of their contentment. - -We arrived at Mandalay about three o'clock in the afternoon. The last -few hours of the journey were most unpleasantly hot, and I was very glad -when we steamed into the station, and I saw my brother-in-law (who had -descended from his "mountain heights" to meet me) waiting on the -platform. The journey had been delightful in many ways, but after being -twenty-two hours boxed up in a railway carriage with a chattering ayah, -it was a great relief to reach one's destination at last. - -When I arrived in Mandalay I was filled with an overwhelming gratitude -towards Mr. Rudyard Kipling for his poem on the subject. - -Rangoon, fascinating and interesting though it be, is yet chiefly an -Anglo-Indian town, but Mandalay, though the Palace and Throne room have -been converted into a club, though its Pagodas and shrines have been -desecrated by the feet of the alien, and though its bazaar has become a -warehouse for the sale of Birmingham and Manchester imitations, yet, -spite of all, this former stronghold of the Kings of Burmah still -retains its ancient charm. - -When first I experienced the fascination of this wonderful town, my -feelings were too deep for expression, and I suffered as a soda water -bottle must suffer, until the removal of the cork brings relief. -Suddenly there flashed into my mind three lines of Mr. Kipling's poem, -and as I wandered amid "them spicy garlic smells, the sunshine and the -palm trees and the tinkly temple bells," I relieved my feelings by -repeating those wonderfully descriptive lines; I was once again happy, -and I vowed an eternal gratitude to the author. - -Before the end of my two days stay in Mandalay I began to look on him as -my bitterest foe, and to regard the publication of that poem as a -personal injury. - -The Hotel in which we stayed was also occupied by a party of American -"Globe Trotters." In all probability they were delightful people, as -are most of their countrymen. They were immensely popular among the -native hawkers, who swarmed upon the door steps and verandahs, and sold -them Manchester silks and glass rubies at enormous prices. But we -acquired a deeply rooted objection to them, springing from their desire -to live up to their surroundings. - -We should have forgiven them, had they confined themselves to eating -Eastern fruits and curries, wearing flowing Burmese silken dressing -gowns, and smattering their talk with Burmese and Hindustani words. But -these things did not satisfy them. Evidently they believed that they -could only satisfactorily demonstrate their complete association with -their surroundings, by singing indefatigably, morning, noon, and night, -that most un-Burmese song, "Mandalay." - -They sang it hour after hour, during the whole of the two days we spent -in the place. - -In their bedrooms, and about the town they hummed and whistled it, -during meals they quoted and recited it. At night, and when we took our -afternoon siesta, they sang it boldly, accompanying one another on the -cracked piano, and all joining in the chorus with a conscientious -heartiness that did them credit. - -We tossed sleepless on our couches, wearied to death of this endless -refrain that echoed through the house: or, if in a pause between the -verses we fell asleep for a few seconds, it was only to dream of a -confused mixture of "Moulmein Pagodas," flying elephants, and fishes -piling teak, till we were once again awakened by the uninteresting and -eternally reiterated information that "the dawn comes up like thunder -out of China 'cross the Bay." - -The only relief we enjoyed, was that afforded by one member of the party -who sang cheerfully: "On the Banks of Mandalay," thereby displaying a -vagueness of detail regarding the geographical peculiarities of the -place, which is so frequently (though no doubt wrongly) attributed to -his nation. - -And here I pause with the uncomfortable feeling that in writing my -experiences of Burmah, I ought to make some attempt to describe this -far-famed city of Mandalay, the wonders of its palaces, the richness of -its pagodas, the brilliancy of its silk bazaar, and its other thousand -charms. - -But such a task is beyond me. Others may aspire to paint in glowing -colours the fascinations of this royal town, and the beauty of the -wonderful buildings; but in my modesty I refrain, for to my great regret -I saw little of them. My stay in the town was too short, and I was too -weary after my journey, to admit of much sight-seeing. Beyond a short -drive through the delightful eastern streets, and a hurried glimpse of -the Throne Room, I saw nothing of the place, and the only thing I -clearly recollect is the Moat, which I admired immensely, mistaking it -for the far-famed Irrawaddy! - -Therefore I will pass by Mandalay with that silent awe which we always -extend to the Unknown, and leave it to cleverer pens than mine to depict -its charms. "I cannot sing of that I do not know," especially nowadays -when so many people _do_ know, and are quite ready to tell one so. - - - - -CHAPTER IV. - -THE JOURNEY TO THE HILLS. - - "Old as the chicken that Kitmûtgars bring - Men at dâk bungalows,--old as the hills." - (Rudyard Kipling.) - - - The horse who never in that sort - Had handled been before, - What thing upon his back had got - Did wonder more and more.--"John Gilpin." - - -We left Mandalay at half-past three in the morning, (our heavy baggage -having preceded us in bullock carts the night before) and with our -bedding and hand baggage packed with ourselves into a "ticca gharry," we -started at that unearthly hour on our seventeen miles drive to the foot -of the hills, where our ponies awaited us. - -As we left the last lights of the town behind us, and drove out into the -dreary looking country beyond, I was filled with a mixture of elation -and alarm, but when my brother-in-law (I knew not whether seriously or -in fun) remarked that he hoped we should meet no dacoits, the feeling of -alarm predominated. - -It would be an adventure, and I had come there purposely for adventure, -but an adventure does not appear so fascinating in the dark at three -o'clock in the morning, as it does at noonday. I was quite willing to -have it postponed. However my companion seemed at home, and settled -himself to sleep in his corner, so I endeavoured to do likewise. - -But somehow sleep seemed impossible. The shaking and rattling of the -uncomfortable "gharry," the strange shadows of the trees, and the dark -waste of paddy fields stretching before and around us, faintly showing -in the mysterious grey light of the dawn, all combined to prevent me -from following my brother's example. - -On and on we drove along that interminable road, cramped, weary, and -impatient; I sat in silence with closed eyes, waiting longingly for the -end of our journey, wondering what strange people inhabited this dreary -tract of land, and dreaming of the possible adventures to be encountered -in the wild country towards which we were travelling. - -Suddenly the gharry stopped abruptly; there was a loud cry from the -gharry wallah, a confused medley of Burmese voices, and I sprang up to -find we were surrounded by a large body of evil looking men, armed with -"dahs." We were "held up" by dacoits! - -My brother started up, shouting eager threats and imprecations to the -men, and sprang from the carriage. I caught a glimpse of him surrounded -by natives, fighting fiercely with his back to the carriage door, while -he shouted to me to hand him his revolver from the back seat of the -gharry. - -But ere I could do so, my attention was called to the matter of my own -safety. Three natives had come round to my side of the gharry, the door -was wrenched open, and a huge native flourishing a large "dah" rushed at -me, evidently with the intention of procuring the revolver himself. - -At that moment all feelings of fear left me, and I only felt furiously -angry. Quickly I seized my large roll of bedding, and pulling it down -before me received the blow in the folds; then when the knife was -buried in the clothes, I crashed the revolver with all my force in the -face of the dacoit, and he fell unconscious at my feet, leaving the -"dah" in my possession. - -The remaining natives rushed at me, and I had no time to lose. Pulling -down my brother's bedding roll, I doubled my defence, and from behind it -endeavoured to stab at the attacking natives with the captured "dah," -dodging their blows behind my barricade. The door of the gharry was -narrow, and they could only come at me one at a time. - -After playing "bo peep" over my blankets for a little time, they -retired, and I was just turning to assist my brother, when suddenly, -they rushed my defence, one behind the other, pushed over my barricade -with me under it, fell on the top themselves, and we all rolled a -confused heap on the bottom of the gharry. - -At that moment the man at the pony's head relaxed his hold on the -bridle, and the animal, with a speed and energy unusual in Burmese -ponies, escaped and galloped down the road, dragging behind it the -battered gharry, on the floor of which I and the two natives were -struggling. - -Faster and faster went the pony, till we seemed to be flying through the -air, the door hanging open, and we three fighting for life inside. I -made haste to crawl under a seat, and again barricaded myself with my -bedding roll, but it was quite clear to me that the struggle could not -last much longer; I was at my wit's end, and my strength was nearly -exhausted. - -Then the natives climbed on to the seat opposite, and pulled and pushed -my barricade, until at last I could hold it no longer. They dragged it -away, and threw it from the gharry. My neck was seized between two slimy -brown hands, I was pulled from my hiding place, a dark evil looking face -peered gloatingly into mine, and then I suppose I lost consciousness, -for I remember nothing more until----I awoke, and found we had arrived -at the foot of the hills; not a dacoit had we encountered, and the whole -affair had been only a dream. - -I was disappointed: I feel I shall never be so heroic again, or have -such another opportunity for the display of my bravery. - -I cannot remember the name of the village at the foot of the hills where -we found our ponies waiting, and I certainly could not spell it if I -did. It consisted of a mere half a dozen native huts, set down by the -road side, and looked a most deserted little place. While our ponies -were saddled, and our baggage transferred from the gharry to the bullock -cart in attendance, we walked round the village, very glad to stretch -our legs after the cramped ride. - -All the natives stared at us, as they went leisurely about their daily -work; the girls in their brightly coloured, graceful dresses, going -slowly to the well, carrying their empty kerosene oil cans, the almost -universal water pots of the Burman; the men lounging about, smoking big -cheroots, and evidently lost in deep meditation; and the old women -sitting in their low bamboo huts, grinding paddy, cooking untempting -looking mixtures, or presiding over the sale of various dried fruits -and other articles, for in Burmah there is rarely a house where -something is not sold. - -On the whole, we on our part did not excite very much interest. It needs -more than the advent of two strangers to rouse the contemplative Burman -from his habitual state of dreaminess. - -In one hut I saw a family sitting round their meal, laughing and -chatting merrily, while a wee baby, clad in gorgeous silk attire (it -looked like the mother's best dress) danced before them in the funniest -and most dignified manner, encouraged and coached by an elder sister, -aged about seven. They looked such a merry party that I quite longed to -join them, for I was beginning to feel hungry, but I changed my mind on -a nearer view of the breakfast, a terrible mixture of rice and curried -vegetables, with what looked remarkably like decayed fish for a relish. - -All this time, though outwardly calm and happy, I was inwardly suffering -from ever increasing feelings of dread at the thought of the ordeal -before me. As I have explained elsewhere, I have always had a terror of -horses, and had not ridden for eleven years, not in fact since I was a -child, and then I invariably fell off with or without any provocation. -But here was I, with twenty-six miles of rough road between me and my -destination, and no way of traversing that distance save on horseback. -Knowing my peculiarities, my brother had begged the very quietest pony -from the police lines at Mandalay, the animal bearing this reputation -stood saddled before me, and I could think of no further excuse for -longer delaying our start. - -Accordingly, I advanced nervously towards the pony, who looked at me out -of the corners of his eyes in an inexplicable manner, and after three -unsuccessful attempts, and much unwonted embracing of my brother, I at -last succeeded in mounting, and the reins (an unnecessary number of them -it seemed to me) were thrust into my hands. - -I announced myself quite comfortable and ready to start; may Heaven -forgive the untruth! But evidently my steed was not prepared to depart. -I "clucked" and shook the reins, and jumped up and down on the saddle in -the most encouraging way, but the pony made no movement. - -My brother, already mounted and off, shouted to me to "come on." It was -all very well to shout in that airy fashion, I couldn't well "come on" -without the pony, and the pony wouldn't. - -At last he did begin to move, backwards! - -This was a circumstance for which I was wholly unprepared. If a horse -runs away, naturally, he is to be stopped by pulling the reins, but if -he runs away backwards, there seems nothing to be done; whipping only -encourages him to run faster. I tried to turn the pony round, so that if -he persisted in continuing to walk backwards, we might at any rate -progress in the right direction, but he preferred not to turn, and I did -not wish to insist, lest he should become annoyed; to annoy him at the -very outset of the journey I felt would be the height of imprudence. - -The natives of the village gathered round, and with that wonderful -capacity for innocent enjoyment for which the Burmese are noted, watched -the performance with the deepest interest and delight, while I could do -nothing but try to appear at ease, as though I really preferred to -travel in that manner. - -At last however, my brother would wait no longer, and shouting to the -orderly and sais, he made them seize the bridle of my wilful pony, and -drag us both forcibly from the village. - -And so we started. - -Oh! that ride--what a nightmare it was! The pony justified his -reputation, and was certainly the most quiet animal imaginable. He -preferred not to move at all, but when forced to do so, the pace was -such that a snail could easily have given him fifty yards start in a -hundred, and a beating, without any particular exertion. He did not -walk, he crawled. - -In vain did I encourage him in every language I knew, in vain did the -sais and orderly ride behind beating him, or in front pulling him, our -efforts were of no avail. Once or twice, under great persuasion, he -broke into what faintly suggested a trot, for about two minutes, but -speedily relapsed again into his former undignified crawl. - -My brother at last lost patience and rode on ahead, leaving me to the -tender mercies of the sais, who, no longer under the eye of his master, -and seeing no reason to hurry, soon ceased his efforts, and we jogged on -every minute more slowly, till I fell into a sleepy trance, dreaming -that I should continue thus for ever, riding slowly along through the -silent Burmese jungle, wrapped in its heavy noon-day sleep, till I too -should sink under the spell of the sleep god, and become part of the -silence around me. - -But the scenery was glorious, and I had ample time to admire it. Our -road wound up the side of a jungle clad hill, around and above us rose -other hills covered with the gorgeous vari-coloured jungle trees and -shrubs. Immediately below us lay a deep wooded ravine, shut in by the -hills, and far away behind us stretched miles and miles of paddy fields -and open country shrouded in a pale blue-grey mist. I cannot imagine -grander scenery; what most nearly approach it are views in Saxon -Switzerland, but the latter can be compared only as an engraving to a -painting, the colour being lacking. - -What most impressed me was the absolute silence, and the utter absence -of any sign of human life. All round us lay miles and miles of unbroken -jungle, inhabited only by birds and beasts; all nature seemed silent, -mysterious, and void of human sympathies as in the first days of the -world, before man came to conquer, and in conquering to destroy the -charm. It is impossible quite to realise this awe-inspiring loneliness -of the jungle - - - "Where things that own not man's dominion dwell." - "And mortal foot hath ne'er or rarely been." - - -We halted for breakfast at a small wayside village, where we found the -usual mat "dâk" bungalow, guarded by the usual extortionate khansamah, -and surrounded by the usual dismal compound full of chickens. - -Here it was that I made my first acquaintance with the world renowned -Burmese chicken, an acquaintance destined to become more and more close, -until it blossomed into a deep and never to be forgotten hatred. - -The Burmese chicken, whose name is legion, is a thin haggard looking -fowl, chiefly noted for his length of leg, and utter absence of -superfluous flesh. He picks up a precarious living in the compounds of -the houses to which he is attached, and leads a sad, anxious life, owing -to the fact that he is generally recognised as the legitimate prey of -any man or beast, who at any time of the day or night may be seized with -a desire to "chivy." - -Consequently he wears a harassed, expectant look, knowing that the end -will overtake him suddenly and without warning. One hour he is happily -fighting with his comrades over a handful of grain, within the next he -has been killed, cooked, and eaten without pity, though frequently with -after feelings of repentance on the part of the eater. - -It is, doubtless, the kindly heart of the native cook that prevents him -killing the bird more than half an hour before the remains are due at -table; he does not wish to cut off a happy life sooner than is -absolutely necessary. It is, doubtless too, the same gentle heart that -induces him to single out for slaughter the most ancient of fowls, -leaving the young and tender (if a Burmese chicken ever is tender) still -to rejoice in their youth. If this be so, there is displayed a trait of -native character deserving appreciation--which appreciation the result, -however, fails as a rule to secure. - -It is wonderful what a variety of disguises a Burmese chicken can take -upon itself. The quick change artist is nowhere in comparison. - -It appears successively as soup, joint, hash, rissoles, pie, patties and -game. It is covered with rice, onions, and almonds, and raisins, and -dubbed "pillau"; it is covered with cayenne pepper and called a savoury. -It is roasted, boiled, baked, potted, and curried, and once I knew an -enterprising housekeeper mix it with sardines and serve up a half truth -in the shape of "fish cakes." - -But under whatever name it may appear, in whatever form it be disguised, -it may be invariably recognised by the utter absence of any flavour -whatever. - -After breakfast, my brother assumed his most stern judicial expression -and gave me to understand gently but firmly, that he refused to continue -our journey under existing circumstances, and that if I really could not -induce my pony to progress faster, I must mount that of the orderly, and -leave the laggard to be dealt with by a male hand. I could not object; I -was alone in a distant land far from the protection of my family; I -could only agree to the proposal with reluctance, and disclaim all -responsibility with regard to my own or the new pony's safety. - -Accordingly, the saddles were changed, much to the dissatisfaction of -the orderly, and I was speedily mounted on my new steed. - -At first the exchange appeared to be an improvement. The pony had a -brisk walk, and we progressed quite as rapidly as I wished. I began to -feel an accomplished horse-woman, and when my brother suggested a two -miles canter, I consented after but a few objections. - -We started gaily, and we did canter two miles without a break, and the -pony and I did not part company during the proceedings, but that is all -I can say. - -I have frequently heard foolish people talk of the unspeakable joy of a -wild gallop, the delightful motion, the exhilaration of rushing through -the air, with a good horse beneath you. Once I listened to such talkers -with credulity, now I listen in astonishment. Our gallop was wild enough -in all conscience, but after the first three minutes I became convinced -it was the most uncomfortable way of getting about I had ever -experienced. - -I started elegantly enough, gripping my pummel tightly between my knees, -and sitting bolt upright, but I soon gave up all ideas of putting on -unnecessary "side" of that sort; this ride was no fancy exhibition, it -was grim earnest. - -I and the pony were utterly out of sympathy with one another, and I am -sure the latter did all he could to be tiresome out of pure -"cussedness." Whenever I bumped down, he seemed to bump up, and the -result was painful; whenever I pulled the reins he merely tossed his -head scornfully; and I am sure the saddle must have been slipping about -(though it appeared firm enough afterwards), for I landed on all parts -of it in turn. - -To add to my troubles my sola topee became objectionable. - -It was not an ordinary looking topee; it being my first visit to the -East, of course I had procured an exceedingly large one, and in addition -to its great size, it was very heavy and very ugly. I fancy it was -originally intended to be helmet shaped, but its maker had allowed his -imagination to run away with him, and when finished, it was the most -extraordinary looking headdress that ever spoilt the appearance of a -naturally beautiful person. - -It resembled rather a swollen plum pudding in a very large dish, than a -respectable sola topee. - -It was so constructed inside as to fit no existingly shaped human head, -and consequently required to be balanced with the greatest care. By dint -of sitting very upright I had succeeded in keeping it on my head during -the earlier stages of my journey, but now I had more important matters -to think of than sola topees, and consequently it became grievously -offended, and (being abnormally sensitive, as are most deformed -creatures) it commenced to wobble about in a most alarming manner. - -On and on we went. I had almost ceased to have any feeling in my legs -and body, and began to wonder vaguely what strange person's head had got -on to my shoulders, it seemed to fit so loosely. We flew past the second -milestone, but my brother, who rode just ahead of me, absorbed no doubt -in the joys of the gallop, never stayed his reckless course. I could not -stop my pony, because both hands were, of course, engaged in holding on -to the saddle. I lost my stirrup; it was never any good to me, but my -foot felt lonely without it. My knees were cramped, my head ached, and -finally my sola topee, unable longer to endure its undignified wobble, -descended slowly over my face and hung there by its elastic, effectually -blocking out everything from my sight. - -I would have infinitely preferred to have fallen off, but did not know -how to do so comfortably. - -At last, with a mighty effort I crouched in the saddle, gingerly -released one hand, pushed aside the topee from before my mouth, and -yelled to my brother to stop. He turned, saw something unusual in my -appearance, and, thank goodness! stopped. - -It could not have lasted much longer; either I or the pony would have -been obliged to give way. When I indignantly explained to my brother -what the pony had been doing, all he said was that he hoped to goodness -I had not given it a sore back. I know its back could not have been a -quarter as sore as was mine! I did not gallop again that or any other -day. - - -We spent the night in another "dâk" bungalow, consisting of three mat -walled sleeping apartments, scantily furnished, and an open veranda -where we dined. We dined off chicken variously disguised, and being very -stiff and weary, retired early to bed. - -During dinner, my brother casually remarked that on his last visit there -he had killed a snake in the roof, and on retiring to my room I -remembered his words and trembled. - -I don't know much about snakes, save only that a "king cobra" alone will -attack without provocation; therefore, if one is attacked, the reptile -is almost certain to be a snake of that species. - -What precautions should therefore be taken to defend one's life I have -not ascertained, but I give the information as affording at any rate -some satisfaction in case of attack. - -The roof of my room was thatched, and looked the very dwelling place of -snakes, and how could I possibly defend myself from attack (supposing -king cobras inhabited that district), when they might drop down on me -while I slept, or come up through the chinks and holes in the wooden -floor, and bite my feet when I was getting into bed? The situation was a -desperate one. What was to be done? - -After half an hour, I was forced to abandon my plan of sitting up all -night on the table, under my green sun-umbrella; the table was so -rickety that I fell off whenever I dozed, and the situation became -painful. - -At last a new plan occurred to me. I took a wild leap from the table to -the bed, and succeeded in rigging up a tent with the mosquito curtain -props, and a sheet. Then, secure from all dangers from below or above, I -fell fast asleep, and awoke next morning to find myself still alive and -unharmed. - -I am convinced that more than one cunning serpent that night returned -foiled to its lair, having at last encountered a degree of cunning -surpassing its own. - -We made an early start next morning, as we had still twelve miles to -ride before the day grew hot. - -The orderly objected to ride further on a snail, and had put my saddle -once more on my original pony, so I finished my ride without further -mishap. - -It was a delicious morning; the early lights and shadows of dawn and -sunrise enhanced the beauty of the richly coloured jungle bordering the -road. On all sides we were surrounded by the tall, dark, waving trees, -and the thick green, pink, golden, and red-brown under-growth, save -occasionally when the close bushes were cleared a little, and we caught -tempting glimpses of shady moss covered glades, chequered by the -sunlight peering through the thick leaves. Everything was very still, -and except for the soft whisper of the jungle grass, a great silence -brooded over all. - -Suddenly there broke upon my ears a strange sound, weird, mystic, -wonderful. It was a heavy, grating, creaking noise, more horrible than -aught I had heard before. Nearer and nearer it came; and now it could be -distinguished as the cry of some mighty beast in pain, for the first and -fundamental noise was varied by shrill screams and deep, painful -groans. Was it a wounded elephant? No! surely no living elephant ever -gave voice to such terrible, awe-inspiring sounds. It must be some far -mightier beast, some remnant of the prehistoric ages, which remained -still to drag out a lonely existence, hidden from human eyes, in this -far Burmese jungle. - -But now it was close upon us; the noise was deafening, making day -hideous; round the corner of the road appeared four huge, horns, two -meek looking white heads, and----a bullock cart. - -That was the sole cause of this hideous disturbance, of these -ear-piercing shrieks which rent the air. As usual, the wheels of the -cart were formed of solid circles of wood, not even rounded, and -carefully unoiled, and from these emanated those horrible shrieks, -groans, and creaks, which are the delight and security of the Burmese -driver, and the terror of tigers and panthers haunting the road. - -How eminently peaceful must be the life of the bullock-cart driver! He -knows no hurry, no anxiety, no responsibility. - -Hour after hour, day after day he jogs along, seated on the front of his -cart, occasionally rousing himself to joke and gossip with friends he -may meet on the way, or to encourage his team by means of his long -bamboo stick, but more often he sits wrapped in a deep sleep, or -meditation, trusting for guidance to the meek solemn-faced bullocks -which he drives. His work is done, his life is passed in one long -continuous, sleeping, smoking, and eating sort of existence; the thought -of such a life of careless, uneventful, unambitious happiness, is -appalling. - -[Illustration: BURMESE BULLOCK CART] - -I grew somewhat weary of the frequent opportunities I had of studying -the bullock carts and their drivers during that morning ride. Every cart -jogged on its noisy way along the very centre of the road; but it is not -meet that a Sahib and a representative of the great Queen should occupy -anything but the very centre of the road when taking his rides abroad. -Consequently whenever we met a bullock cart both cavalcades had to stop. -It was a work of time to make the driver hear the orderly's voice, -above the creaking of the wheels; more time was occupied in rousing him -from his sleep, and explaining to him the situation; and more time again -in explaining matters to the bullocks, and inducing them to drag the -cart into the ditch. - -It took five minutes to pass each cart, and as we met a great many that -morning as we approached the village, our progress was considerably -delayed. I should have preferred for the sake of speed to have ridden in -the ditch myself; at the same time I am aware such opinions are unworthy -of the relation of an Indian Civilian. - - -My entrance into Remyo, the future scene of my experiences, at half-past -ten that morning was striking, though hardly dignified. - -Picture to yourself a sorrowful, huddled figure, seated on a weary -dishevelled looking pony, covered from head to foot with red dust, and -surmounted by a large battered topee "tip-tilted like the petal of a -flower." I had long ceased to make any pretence at riding. I sat -sideways on my saddle, as one sits in an Irish car, grasping in one hand -the pummel and in the other my large green sun umbrella, for the sun was -terribly hot. How weary I was, and how overjoyed at arriving at my -destination! - -But even yet my troubles were not over. There was the house, there my -sister waiting in the veranda to welcome me, but directly my pony -arrived at the gate of the compound he stopped dead. Apparently it was -not in the bond that I should be carried up to the door, and so no -further would he go. I was too impatient to argue the matter, too weary -to give an exhibition of horsemanship, so there was nothing to do but -descend, walk up the compound, and tumble undignifiedly into the house, -where the first thing I did was to register a vow that never again, -except in a case of life and death, would I attempt to ride a Burmese -pony. - - - - -CHAPTER V. - -AN UP-COUNTRY STATION. - - "Far from the madding crowd's ignoble strife."--(Gray.) - - -I daresay that Remyo is very like other small up-country stations in -Burmah, but to me it appeared to be the very end of the earth, so -different was it from all I had expected. It stands in a small valley, -surrounded by low jungle-clad hills. The clearing is perhaps three miles -long by one and-a-half wide, but there always appeared to be more jungle -than clearing about the place, so quickly does the former spread. - -The Station is traversed crosswise by two rough tracks called by -courtesy roads, and is surrounded by what is imposingly termed "The -Circular Road." This road, but recently constructed, is six or seven -miles long, and passes mostly outside the clearing, being consequently -bordered in many places on both sides by thick jungle. - -There is something infinitely pathetic to my mind about this poor new -road, wandering aimlessly in the jungle, leading nowhere and used by no -one. At regular distances there stand by the wayside tall posts bearing -numbers. The lonely posts mark the situations of houses which it is -hoped will, in the future, be built on the allotments which they -represent. In theory, the circular road is lined with houses, for Remyo -has a great future before it; but just at present, the future is -travelling faster than the station, and consequently the poor road is -allowed to run sadly into the jungle alone, its course known only to the -dismal representatives of these future houses. - -The only finished building near which this road passes is the railway -station, a neat wooden erection, possessing all the requirements of a -small wayside station, and lacking only one essential feature--a -railway, for the railway, like the great future of Remyo, is late in -arriving, and so the road and the railway station are left sitting sadly -expectant in the jungle, waiting patiently for the arrival of that -future which alone is needed to render them famous. - -In Remyo itself there is a fair sized native bazaar, consisting of rows -of unpleasant looking mat huts, each raised a few feet from the ground, -with sloping overhanging roofs, and open sides. The road through the -bazaar is always very dusty, crowded with bullock carts, goats, and -dogs, and usually alive with naked Burmese babies of every age and size. -Not a pleasant resort on a hot day. - -Besides the bazaar, the station contains the Court House, the District -Bungalow, and the Post Office; half-a-dozen European houses scattered up -and down the clearing, and the club. - -To the Anglo-Indians the club seems as necessary to existence as the air -they breathe. I verily believe that when the white man penetrates into -the interior to found a colony, his first act is to clear a space and -build a club house. - -The Club House at Remyo is a truly imposing looking edifice, perched -high on the hill side, standing in a well kept compound, surrounded by -its offices, bungalows, and stables. About the interior of the building -I must confess ignorance, it being an unpardonable offence for any woman -to cross the threshold. It may be that it is but a whited sepulchre, the -exterior beautiful beyond description, the interior merely emptiness: I -cannot tell. - -At the foot of the Club House stands a tiny, one-roomed, mat hut, the -most unpretentious building I ever beheld, universally known by the -imposing title of "The Ladies Club." Here two or more ladies of the -station nightly assemble for an hour before dinner, to read the two -months old magazines, to search vainly through the shelves of the -"library" for a book they have not read more than three times, to -discuss the iniquities of the native cook, and to pass votes of censure -on the male sex for condemning them to such an insignificant building. - -It has always been a sore point with the ladies of Remyo that their Club -House only contains one room. They argue that if half the members wish -to play whist, and the other half wished to talk, many inconveniences -(to say the least) would arise. As there are but four lady members of -the club, this argument does not appear to me to be convincing, but I do -not pretend to understand the intricacies of club life. - -I have sometimes been tempted to believe that the ladies would really be -happier without a club; possessing one, they feel strongly the necessity -of using it, and though they would doubtless prefer sometimes to sit -comfortably at home, every evening sees them sally forth determinedly to -their tiny hut. There they sit night after night till nearly dark, and -then, not daring to disturb the lordly occupants of the big house, to -demand protection, they steal home nervously along the jungle bordered -road, trembling at every sound, but all the time talking and laughing -cheerfully, in order to convince everybody (themselves in particular) -that they are not at all afraid of meeting a panther or tiger, in fact -would rather prefer to do so than not. Truly the precious club is not -an unmixed blessing! - -There are a few wooden houses in Remyo, but the majority are merely -built of matting, with over-hanging roofs. They are often raised some -twenty feet above the ground, and present the extraordinary appearance -of having grown out of their clothes like school boys. - -The house in which my sister and her husband lived was a wooden erection -of unpretentious appearance. I cannot say who was the architect, but a -careful consideration of the construction of the house revealed to us -much of his method. - -In the first place he was evidently an advocate of the benefits of fresh -air and light. The house was all doors and windows, not one of them, -apparently, intended to shut, and not satisfied with this, the builder -had carefully left wide chinks in the walls, and two or three large -holes in the roof. The front door opened directly into the drawing-room, -the drawing-room into the dining room, the dining-room into the -bedrooms, and the bedrooms on to the compound again. Thus we were -enabled in all weathers to have a direct draught through the house, and -as Remyo is a remarkably windy place, much of our time was occupied in -preventing the furniture from being blown away. Whenever anything was -missing we invariably found it in the back compound, whither it had been -carried by the wind. Life in such an atmosphere was no doubt healthy, -but a trifle wearing to the nerves. - -The compactness of the house was delightful. All the rooms led out of -one another, and there were no inside doors, consequently one could -easily carry on a conversation with those in other parts of the house -without leaving one's chair or raising one's voice. - -The only occasion on which we found this arrangement of the rooms -inconvenient was when we stained the dining room floor. The stain did -not dry for three days, and during that time all communication between -the drawing room and bedrooms was entirely cut off, for the only way -from one to the other was through the dining room, and that was -impossible, unless we wished our beautiful floor to be covered with -permanent foot marks. - -Our architect was evidently a dweller in the plains, and the uses of a -fireplace were unknown to him. In each of the small bedrooms he had -built large open fireplaces, worthy of a baronial hall, while in neither -of the sitting rooms was there the slightest vestige of a fireplace of -any sort or kind whatever. - -This was a little inconvenient. Naturally an affectionate and gregarious -family party, we did not like to spend our evenings, each sitting alone -before our own palatial bedroom fireplace; being properly brought up, -and proud of our drawing room, we preferred to occupy it, and often, as -I sat shivering while the wind tore through the rooms, whistling and -shrieking round the furniture, and the rain poured through the roof, I -wondered what was supposed to be the use of a house at all; we should -have done quite as well without one, except, of course, for the look of -the thing. - -Modern inventions such as bells appear unknown in Remyo. If you want -anything you must shout for it until you get it. - -When calling on a neighbour you stand outside the front door, and shout -for five minutes, if no one appears in that time, you assume they are -not at home, put your cards on the doorstep or through a chink in the -wall, and depart. It is a primitive arrangement, but still, not without -advantages. If you don't wish to find people at home, you shout softly. - -We were superior to all our neighbours in the possession of a bell. We -hung it up in the compound near the servants' "go downs," and passed the -bell rope through various holes in the walls, etc., to the dining room. -I don't know where the bell originally came from, but I think it must -have come from a pagoda, for it was undoubtedly bewitched. It rang at -all hours of the day and night without provocation. Once it pealed out -suddenly at midnight and rang steadily for half-an-hour, when it as -suddenly stopped. This was probably caused by some birds swinging on -the rope, but it was most uncanny. - -The servants used to answer the bell at first when it rang in the day -time, until the joke palled on them, and they became suddenly deaf to -its call. They never answered it at night: I fancy they thought when -they heard it then, that the house was attacked by dacoits or tigers and -we were ringing for help, and they deemed it more prudent to remain shut -up in their "go downs." When we attempted to ring the bell with a -purpose, it invariably stuck somewhere and would not sound. We never -ceased to feel proud of the possession of our bell, but ceased at last -to expect it to be of any practical use. - -When my sister first showed me over her house, my heart sank in spite of -my ostensible admiration, for where was the kitchen? Did dwellers in -Remyo eat no cooked food; must I be satisfied with rice and fruits? -However, my doubts were soon set at rest when we visited the compound, -for there stood a tiny tin shed, inside which was a broad brick wall, -with three holes for fires, and what looked like a dog kennel, but which -I learned was the oven. A fire was lighted inside the oven, and when the -walls were red hot the burning logs were pulled out, the bread placed -in, and walled up. - -How anyone managed to cook anything successfully thus was a marvel to -me. I had gone out to Remyo, fresh from a course of scientific cooking -lectures, intending to rejoice the palates of the poor exiles with the -dainty dishes I would cook for their edification. When I saw that -kitchen, and when I learned that such a thing as a pair of scales did -not exist in the station, all measuring being done by guess work, I gave -up all hope of fulfilling my intention, and looked upon the native cook -as the most talented gentleman of my acquaintance. - -The furniture in Remyo is of the "let-us-pack-up-quickly-and-remove" -type. It is of the lightest and most unsubstantial kind, and has the air -of having seen many sales and many owners. - -The most prominent article in nearly every house is the deck chair, -faithful and much travelled chair, which has accompanied its master over -the sea from England, and wandered with him into many a dreary little -out-of-the-way village, where perchance he sees for months no fellow -white man, and where his chair and pipe alone receive his confidences, -and solace his soul in the utter loneliness of the jungle. No wonder -then that the deck chair wears an important air, and regards other -pieces of furniture, which probably change owners every six months, with -contemptuous scorn. - -The impossibility of having a settled home in Burmah is very pathetic. -In Rangoon, the interior of the houses occasionally wear a settled and -homelike appearance, but in the jungle, never. Everything is selected -with a view to quick packing; pictures, ornaments, and useless -decorations are reduced to a minimum, and only articles of furniture -which are indispensable are seen. When one is liable to be moved -elsewhere at four days' notice, there is no encouragement to take deep -root, the frequent uprooting would be too painful. - -This spirit of constant change seems to enter into the blood of the -Anglo-Indian, for the housewife is perpetually moving her furniture, -"turning her rooms round" so to speak, and she never seems to keep -anything in the same place for more than a week! - -After all, not Burmah, but England is looked upon as "Home." Even the -man of twenty-five years service whose family, friends, and interests -may be all centred in Burmah, who loves the life he leads there, and is -proud of the position he holds, even he talks of what he will do when he -"goes home," and in imagination crowns with a halo "this little precious -stone set in the silver sea, this blessed plot, this earth, this realm, -this England," which no amount of fog, cold, monotony, and dreary -oblivion in his after life here, ever dispels. However happy and -prosperous the Anglo-Indian may be in his exile, going to England, is -"going home." - -Our most unique piece of furniture was the piano. - -I do not remember who was the maker of this renowned instrument, but its -delicate constitution was most unhappily disorganised by the climate. -When first it came to us it was quite a nice piano, rather jingling, and -not always in tune, but "fit to pass in a crowd with a shove." Alas! the -Remyo climate was fatal; the degeneration commenced at once, and -proceeded so rapidly, that in three months all was over. - -The first indication of trouble was a serious feud between several of -the notes, which would persist in making use of one another's tones, and -would not work in harmony. For example, when one struck C sharp, it -promptly sang out high F's tone, and high F, being deprived of its -lawful voice, was forced to adopt a sound like nothing we had ever heard -before. Then E flat became officious and conceited, and persisted in -sounding its shrill note through the whole of the piece in performance, -while G on the contrary was sulky, and wouldn't sound at all. - -Now all this was, of course, most disconcerting to other notes which -had hitherto behaved in an exemplary manner. Some became flurried and -nervous, and sang totally wrong tones, or sounded their own in such a -doubtful, apologetic manner that it was of very little effect. Others -grew annoyed, sided with various leaders in the quarrels, jangling -together noisily, and persisting in sounding discords and interrupting -each other. Others again were seized with a mischievous spirit; they -mocked and mimicked their companions, and vied with one another in -producing the most extraordinary and unpleasant noises. - -Chaos and anarchy reigned in the piano case, all laws of sound and -harmony were o'erthrown, the bass clef could no longer be trusted to -produce a low note, nor the treble a high one, and a chromatic scale -produced such an extraordinary conglomeration of sounds, as would -certainly have caused a German band to die of envy. - -This could not continue for ever, and at last came reaction. Whether -caused by the quarterly visit of the Mandalay chaplain, or by the -shocked and pained expression on the face of a musical friend who called -one day when I was sounding (it could no longer be called playing) the -piano, I know not, but certain it is, the piano was suddenly seized with -remorse. Notes conquered their thieving propensities, differences were -patched up, discord and jangling ceased, and the whole community, as a -sign of real repentance, took upon itself the vow of silence. - -Not a sound could we extract from the once noisy keys, save occasionally -a sad whisper from the treble, or a low murmur from the bass. After a -time, even these ceased, and the once harmonious and soul-stirring tones -of the piano, passed entirely into the Land of Silence. - - - - -CHAPTER VI. - -THE EUROPEAN INHABITANTS. - - "In spite of all temptations - To belong to other nations - He remains an Englishman"-- - "H.M.S. Pinafore." - - -The European population of Remyo is small, consisting in fact of but -four resident ladies, and some dozen resident males; but despite their -limited number they form a very friendly and independent little -community. Among them are to be found the usual types of Anglo Indian -society, but they display characteristics not met with among the -dwellers in larger stations. - -Remyo is so entirely cut off from civilisation, that the inhabitants -must of necessity depend solely upon themselves for amusement, and as -entertainments, at which one would invariably meet the same half-dozen -guests are apt to become a trifle monotonous, the ladies, deprived of -this usual mode of killing time, are compelled to devote themselves to -domestic pursuits rather more than is the custom of most Anglo Indians. - -The comparative coolness of the climate (Remyo being 3,500 feet above -sea level) is conducive to such occupations, and whereas in Rangoon, or -Mandalay, housekeeping duties are reduced to a minimum, in Remyo, the -ladies, having nothing else to do, engage themselves thus with a zeal -and energy worthy of a Dutch housewife. - -But, poor souls, they are terribly handicapped! - -In the first place, they are mostly unaccustomed to housekeeping -themselves; secondly, the servants and household are quite unaccustomed -to being "kept"; and thirdly, it is practically impossible for a -mistress to do her own marketing unless she possess an unusual knowledge -of the language. - -She may resolutely keep accounts, lock up stores, walk about all morning -in an apron, with a large bunch of keys, and have long confidential -conversations with the cook; but in spite of all these possibilities -she can only play at housekeeping; the Cook and Head Boy are the real -managers of the establishment, and they regard the well meant efforts of -their mistress with the kindly amusement one would extend to a child -"keeping house." A Remyo lady's morning interview with her cook, usually -a Madrassee, is an amusing interlude. - -Neither fish nor joints can be procured in the native bazaar, so the -poor housekeeper is often at her wits' end to introduce variety into her -evening menu. - -She begins cheerfully: "Well cook, what have we for dinner to-night?" - -Cook replies laconically, "Chicken." - -"Chicken," repeats the mistress doubtfully, "yes, perhaps that will do. -Did you kill it yesterday?" - -"No! missis, not killed yet." - -"Oh cook!" in a tone of stern reproach, "missis told you always to kill -it the day before, why have you not done so?" - -Cook shelters himself behind an unintelligible answer in a mixture of -Hindustani and "Pigeon English," and after an unsuccessful attempt to -understand him, his mistress is forced to pass from the subject, with a -rebuke which he receives with a reproachful look. "Now," she continues, -"what have you for soup?" - -"Chicken" is again the prompt reply. - -"Is there really nothing else?" demands the mistress uneasily. - -"No, there is nothing else." - -"Well," hopefully, "you must make a very nice little side dish (entrée), -what can we have?" - -"Nice bit of grilled chicken," suggests cook cheerfully. - -"Oh no cook," she cries in despair, "we can't have more chicken." - -"What would missis like then?" - -Missis has not the vaguest idea of any possible suggestion, so -diffidently agrees that perhaps chicken will be nice. She asks about the -savoury, but seeing the word "chicken" again hovering on cook's lips, -decides to make the savoury herself, and turns to receive the daily -accounts. - -Then cook rattles off a long account of his expenditure, which his -mistress duly enters in her book, fondly hoping that he isn't charging -her more than double the cost of each article, but having no means of -discovering the truth. - -Once or twice, on visits to the bazaar, we asked the price of various -things, and triumphantly confronted the cook with the result of our -researches, but he was never in the least disconcerted, and at once -entered into a long, unintelligible, and quite irrefutable explanation -as to why the article was cheaper on that particular day than on any -other. It is quite impossible to upset the cheerful sang froid of a -Madrassee. - -Native servants have the reputation of being most faithful to their -master, and perhaps they deserve the character, for they allow no one -else to cheat him (unless they get the lion's share of the spoil), but -they consider it their special prerogative to cheat him themselves at -every opportunity. - -A scolding from a mistress makes little impression on a Madrassee -servant,--he receives it with an air of gentle reproach, while he most -persistently denies the offence, whatever it may be, from a bad dinner, -to a broken plate or an undelivered message. It is only the master, who, -by a wealth of strong language, and judiciously directed remarks, -concerning the origin, parents, and relations of the guilty one, can -hope to make the slightest impression upon the impervious native mind. - -A further difficulty for the young and ardent housekeeper is the number -of servants in her establishment. One man is engaged to sweep the floor, -another to dust the furniture, one to fetch the water, a second to pour -it into the bath, one to lay the knives and forks, and a companion to -hand the plates, and so on through every department of the household -work. - -This divided duty is exceedingly convenient to the servants, for if -anything be wrong the fault can always be laid on the absent one, or a -scolding delivered to one can be passed on almost unlimitedly until -everyone has enjoyed an opportunity of relieving his feelings. But it is -inconvenient for a mistress; such a delay is caused in carrying out an -order. For example, if a jug of water be spilled, a first servant picks -up the jug, a second dries the table cloth, a third dries the table, a -fourth mops up the water from the floor, a fifth rearranges the -furniture, a sixth carries out the empty jug, and a seventh fetches the -water to refill it. - -All orders are delivered to the Head Boy, a most important and dignified -personage, and he transmits them through the various ranks of his -underlings until they reach the servant whose duty it is to carry them -out. During the transmission through so many channels, of course the -orders become hopelessly mixed. - -We had only fourteen servants, as our house was not large! A few of -them, such as the cook, sais, and butler had definite duties, the -remainder seemed to be chiefly engaged in getting in one another's way -and quarrelling. But I suppose the work of the house could not have been -carried on without them, though their number was distinctly -inconvenient. - -In Rangoon, where servants abound, it would be easy to dismiss and -engage a dozen a day, but not so in the remoter stations. The natives of -India will not leave the plains unless a strong inducement be offered, -and the Burmese much prefer not to work, if they can live without doing -so. Burmans are usually excellent servants, but they are slow to learn -to speak English, and the young housekeeper, who has probably been -accustomed to English, or at least Hindustani-speaking servants in -Rangoon, experiences great difficulty in making herself understood. - -All our servants, with the exception of the cook, were Burmese, and when -my brother happened to be away, and the cook was not at hand to -interpret, we felt particularly helpless. Messages brought at such a -time had to go undelivered, and many a struggle have I had to understand -Po Sin's wants, or to make him understand mine. Housekeeping under such -disadvantages is not a happy undertaking. - -Another way of passing time in which we indulged, was cooking. It was -cooking under difficulties, for the most important part (the baking) had -perforce to be entrusted to the tender mercies of the cook, no one else -being capable of understanding his intricate oven. And the cook, jealous -of our trespass on his prerogative, almost invariably served up our -cakes in the guise, either of soft dough, or of black cinders. - -The chief objects of our cooking experiments were cakes and savouries. -We neither of us knew very much about cooking, but we had cookery books, -and did what we could, supplying the place of the innumerable -ingredients we did not possess, with any we happened to have on hand. -The result was usually distasteful. - -I made cakes with exceeding great vigour and confidence during almost -the whole of my stay, but nobody ate them save myself from bravado, the -dogs from greed, and unsuspecting strangers from innocence. - -Cake making was a fashionable subject of conversation at the ladies' -"five o'clocks" in Remyo, and everyone gave everyone else recipes. I was -astonished to hear my sister (whom I knew to be almost entirely ignorant -upon such subjects) glibly confiding recipes for all sorts of things, on -one of these occasions. I taxed her with the matter later, but she -explained that it was the fashion to give recipes, and so long as she -was careful to include an ingredient or two, impossible to obtain, she -could safely trust that no one would find her out. - -There is one shop in Remyo in addition to the native Bazaar, and the -ladies usually pay it a daily visit, in order, I suppose, to add realism -to their pretence of housekeeping. - -The method adopted on these occasions is remarkable. No one expects to -find anything she really wants in the shop, as it is kept by a native of -India, but she begins hopefully asking for various articles, each demand -being greeted by a shake of the head. She then asks the shopkeeper what -he does happen to sell, at which he appears doubtful, but suggests some -useless thing such as antimacassars. The purchaser at length makes a -tour of the shop, picks out the least useless article she can find, and -bears it home in triumph. - -The unwise thing to do, is to order an article from Rangoon or Mandalay. -One is indeed lucky if it arrives within twelve months after being -ordered, and without an expenditure of all one's powers of sarcasm in -letters of remonstrance, and a fortune in stamps. - -Firstly, there will be received about a dozen letters, with intervals of -four days or so between each, demanding fresh descriptions and -explanations of the desired article. Then, when more specific -description is an impossibility, letters for money will arrive; a -request for a rupee for carriage, another request for five annas for -something else, for half a rupee that has been overlooked in the first -account, and so on for four weeks more. Then the article is announced to -be upon the way, but it does not arrive. More letters bring to light the -fact that it is lost; has most mysteriously disappeared; cannot be -traced anywhere. - -New people come upon the scene. Letters from carriers and agents arrive. -Weeks elapse, still the article cannot be found. Another is in course of -construction, when it is suddenly discovered that by some strange -oversight the original was overlooked, never sent off at all, and is -still reposing in the same tiresome shop. At length the once desired -purchase arrives, but the purchaser has now long ceased to feel any -interest in it whatever. - -The inhabitants of Remyo live together in apparent peace and -friendliness, but there is between them one never ending source of -rivalry, _i.e._ their gardens. - -Gardening is one of the most fashionable employments in Remyo. Everyone -has a garden, though the uninitiated would probably not recognise the -fact, and the amount of time, thought, and energy expended thereon is -worthy of better results than those I beheld. - -For the "Remyoans" are ambitious folk, and are not content with the -flowers, plants and natural products of the country. Their desire is to -have a real English garden, and with this end in view, they sow -innumerable seeds, set many bulbs, rake, dig and water (or superintend -these operations) till life is a burden both to themselves and to their -servants. Possibly, I did not remain long enough, but the results I saw -were not satisfactory; it required a great stretch of imagination to -mark any resemblance between a large bare compound covered with coarse -jungle grass, dotted about with flat grey-soiled beds containing a few -withered looking plants (half-a-dozen violets perhaps, and a haggard -sunflower), and an English garden. Perhaps long absence from home had -dulled their recollection of gardens in England. - -We were specially unlucky in our garden. Had we been content to confine -our efforts to plants in pots and boxes (as did some of our wiser -neighbours) we might have been fairly successful. But visions of rose -gardens, artistically laid out beds, and mossy violet covered dells -dazzled us, and our ambitions in this direction were boundless. - -The coarse grass, the poor soil, and the persistent reappearances of -unsightly jungle weeds in all sorts of unexpected places should have -daunted us, but we had souls above such trifles. Directly we had formed -our plans we set to work, scorning the advice of more experienced -people, and disregarding all considerations of prepared beds, manure, -and seasons. We marked out several intricately shaped beds, dug them up, -lightly scattered some good soil over the top, and proceeded to sow our -seed with hearty good will. - -The first difficulty we met with was with regard to arrangement. Each of -us had a favourite plan, the abandonment of which no arguments on the -part of the others could persuade. At length, after much useless -discussion, we decided each to go our own way, sow our seed where we -chose, and leave it to Nature to settle the difficulty. This was so far -satisfactory, tho' we felt anxious when we found that nasturtiums had -been sown on the top of daffodil bulbs, and one poor little bed of -pansies had a border of sweet peas and sunflowers. - -For some days after we had laid out the garden, my sister and I had a -wearing time. The first thing in the early mornings we hurried out for -an eager search after signs of life in our seeds. We divided the day -into watches, that someone might always be at hand to defend the -precious seed from the marauding crows and pigeons. The cool of the -evening, usually given up to tennis and other amusements, was devoted -wholly to the fatiguing task of watering. - -At last, sooner in fact than we really expected, we were rewarded by a -few delicate green shoots, peering cautiously above the ground. How -tenderly we cherished these first fruits of our toil; how carefully we -shaded them from the sun, watered them, and protected them from the evil -onslaught of the pigeons. How angry we were when we discovered they were -weeds. - -However, we were rewarded at last by the unmistakable appearance of -cultivated plants. Nearly every seed sent up its little green shoot, and -for a few days we were most unpleasantly proud, and treated our friends -with contemptuous pity, while we visited and measured the plants almost -every half-hour, to see if they had grown in the interval. But our joy -was short lived, for from some cause or another, either the strong sun, -the lack of water, or the poor soil, all our plants withered before they -put forth flowers. - -At first we refused to believe our ill fortune; we told one another that -it was always thus at first with delicate plants, that they must have -more water and less sun. We covered them over in the heat of the day -with waste paper baskets, topees, and cunningly erected tents of straw, -and we risked our lives a hundred times, by running out in the hot sun -to replace these, when the wind blew them away. We talked bravely of -being able soon to gather bunches of daffodils, and to send our -neighbours baskets of sweet peas. But we each felt all the time in our -heart of hearts, that our hopes were doomed to disappointment. - -At last we could keep up the delusion no longer, and owned the fact of -our failure to one another; and being now sadder and wiser folk, threw -away the withered plants, and made a new garden, following this time the -advice of our neighbours. - -The only plants which did prosper in this first garden were the -nasturtiums (I verily believe they will flourish anywhere) and for -several hours a tiny bed round the foot of a tree at the bottom of the -compound veritably blazed with the colour afforded by four flourishing -nasturtiums; but while we were at the Club that evening, the crows -pecked off all the petals of the flowers, and our only success was but a -short lived one. - -The kitchen garden, which we consigned to the care of Po Sin, our head -boy, was rather more successful, our radishes, and mustard and cress -being the wonder of the country side. - -Then we had good hopes for the peas too; there was one row about ten -inches high which looked really promising, and as we sat on the veranda -in the evenings contemplating this cheerful sight, we talked longingly -of the time when we should have a dish of our own peas for dinner. - -But alas for the vanity of human expectations. One morning, my sister -had sallied forth to inspect the garden, when I was startled by the -despairing cry of "Come, come at once, the peas are flowering;" and upon -hurrying to the spot I found it too true; our precocious peas were -already in flower, and nothing could be done to discourage them. After a -few days the petals fell away, and miniature pea pods, containing -microscopic peas appeared in their place. Our wishes were fulfilled; we -had a dish, (a very small one) of our own peas for dinner, but alas it -consisted of the produce of the entire row. - -Another source of much interest was our strawberry plant. I took 100 -strawberry runners out with me from England, but, unfortunately, only -one survived, which put forth three new shoots, and appeared for a time -quite healthy, but never bore fruit. Still, it may yet do so; and in the -meantime it is much admired by all the inhabitants of Remyo. - -Our second garden, happily, being prepared with more regard to the -demands of the climate, was a success, and wiped out the stain of our -first failure. - -It is well that the Remyo ladies can interest themselves in the manner I -have indicated, for between breakfast and tea time the sun is so -terribly hot, as to render out-door exercise quite impossible, and in -the absence of many books time is sometimes difficult to kill. - -Ladies in England, with their hundred and one occupations, their -amusements, household duties, and perhaps charities to attend to, can -have but a very faint conception of how wearisomely long and lonely are -some days, to their Anglo-Indian sisters. Their husbands away, or busy -much of the day, deprived of their children's society, with few books, -few amusements, and practically no duties, life is far from being an -unqualified joy to these exiled women. Let the British matron who would -accuse her Eastern sister of idleness, frivolity, and worse, consider -these things, and forbear to judge. - -The men, with their work and sport to engage their time, are less apt -to find the days long; but even they at times feel the same strain. -Indeed, I remember one day, when there was no work to be done, my -brother and sister, (who had but lately left Rangoon with its constant -whirl of gaiety) became so hopelessly and desperately bored, that we -were reduced to revive our drooping spirits by making sugar toffee over -the spirit kettle. - -Before breakfast and after tea are the opportunities for exercise and -amusement, and the most is made of these cooler hours. - -Remyo boasts a gravel tennis court, and a nine-hole golf course, mostly -bunkers. Two more tennis courts, and a cricket and polo ground are in -course of construction, preparatory to the arrival of the Great Future -to which I have referred. Each form of exercise enjoys about three days -popularity at a time. At one time tennis will be the rage, and every one -repairs to the Club court, tho' so short are the evenings before sunset, -that it is impossible to play more than three sets an afternoon, so we -are forced to be content with about three games each. Then the tennis -rage dies away, and golf suddenly becomes the fashionable game. - -Like most occupations in Remyo, golf is golf under difficulties, though -personally, whenever and wherever I play golf, I play under -difficulties. The links are chiefly jungle, and a wood axe would -probably be the most useful accessory to the enjoyment of the game. The -holes are short, and a good player would probably drive on to the green -every time, but at Remyo we were not good players. If by some lucky -chance one drove perfectly straight, there was nothing worse to fear -than a tree, or a deep nullah, filled with reeds and hoof marks, a -nullah where might be spent a harassing quarter of an hour, slashing at -a half hidden ball, which, in sheer desperation, one was at last -compelled to pick out. But if the drive were not straight, then what -endless and interesting possibilities or impossibilities were revealed. -Heaps of stones, inpenetrable bushes, reeds, rabbit-holes, and every -form of acute misery which the golfer's soul can conceive. - -Yet the Links are very popular, and are the scene of many an exciting -match, in spite of lost balls, broken clubs, and lost tempers. I have -seen three clubs broken by one man in an afternoon's match, and he was -neither a particularly bad player, nor especially violent. - -The Burman is not a success as a caddie. Our loogalays looked upon the -game at first with indifference, then with dislike. I think they -imagined that we purposely drove the ball into a hopeless tangle of -grass and bushes in order to scold them when they could not find it. -They could never be induced to make any distinction between the clubs, -and looked hurt when we curtly refused to drive with our putters. Their -notion of marking balls, too, is very primitive; Po Mya only found one -during my stay, which it turned out was an old one lost some days -before. In fine, they seemed to think it the greatest folly that we -should tramp up and down, and in and out of nullahs, and lose our -tempers so unnecessarily, because of a small white ball, when we had -plenty more at home. - -On some afternoons everyone will repair to the new polo and cricket -ground, and walk up and down the new laid turf, discussing solemnly the -drainage, and general advantages and disadvantages of the position; or, -feeling energetic, will practise cricket, and the knowing ones will give -exhibitions of tricky polo strokes. - -The making of the polo ground was seriously delayed at first on account -of the divergent opinions as to the best site, each declaring his -selection to be the only one possible, and showering unlimited contempt -upon all others. Every day we were dragged off to inspect a new spot, -and all appeared to me so equally lacking in points of advantage, that I -had no difficulty in impressing each new discoverer with my knowledge in -such matters, by disparaging (in confidence) all other schemes than his. - -Finally, a site was chosen, and while the ground was in course of -construction, those whose views had been disregarded, derived the -satisfaction (always to be had in such cases) of discussing the -insurmountable obstacles to the selected proposal. - -Some afternoons were devoted to rides. The jungle around Remyo is -lovely, tho' not being there during the Rains, I did not see it to -perfection. There are delightful rides in every direction, and exquisite -views from the hills, whence can be seen for miles nothing but -undulating waves of jungle, every colour from deepest reds and browns to -the bright pink of the peach blossom, and the pale green of the feathery -bamboos. It is a wonderful sight, this unbroken jungle, bordered in the -far distance by the shadowy blue hills of the Shan States. - -Sometimes we visited quaint pagodas, with their neighbouring pretty, -many-roofed kyaungs where the yellow robed hpoongyis, wander in -meditation, or study 'neath the shade of the palm and banana groves. The -pagodas are all very similar in shape, and near to each is a tazoung -full of images of Gaudama, with ever the same calm peaceful smile, -denoting a philosophy superior to the cares and artificialities of the -world around. - -Sometimes we rode along narrow jungle paths, bordered by a tangled mass -of bright coloured bushes and undergrowth, or by the tall, waving, -jungle grass, which is always whispering. These paths lead to tiny -collections of bamboo huts, surrounded by high fences to keep out -dacoits and other marauders, where the unambitious native leads a -peaceful, contented life, under the shadow of the bamboos and peepul -trees; an uneventful existence, enlivened, perhaps, occasionally by a -Pwé, or visit to a pagoda feast at a neighbouring village. - -I enjoyed these expeditions, tho' they were ever fraught with danger to -my limbs. Nothing would induce me again to mount a pony (I had had -sufficient experience) so I accompanied the others on my bicycle. - -Of late years many wonderful bicycle riders have exhibited their tricks -to the public, but I am certain none have performed such extraordinary -feats as are called for by the state of the Burmese roads, most of them -mere jungle tracks, ploughed in every direction into deep ruts by the -bullock carts. It was impossible to ride in the furrows, as they were -not sufficiently wide to allow the pedals to work round, so I was -obliged to perform a sort of plank riding trick along the top of the -rut. Occasionally, my eminence would break off abruptly, and unless the -bicycle succeeded in jumping the gap a fall was inevitable. Never had -bicycle such severe usage, nor ever did such yeoman service as mine; but -save an occasional twist of the handle bars, or a bent spoke, I never -met with a serious accident, and I soon learned the art of "falling -softly." - -My anxieties, too, were increased by the mistaken kindness of my -companions, who would persist in riding beside me and conversing. One -man in particular (I have forgiven him, for I know he meant it kindly) -would never consent to leave me to ride alone. He would trot along on -his pony, either just beside, or worse still just behind me, when I felt -I might fall at any moment, and that he could not help riding over me. -He would chatter away gaily, while I, with agonised expression, -struggled along, one eye on the road and one eye on the pony, scarce -heeding his remarks, making the most hopelessly vague replies to his -questions, and committing myself to I know not what opinions. - -One day we actually took a walk. We ladies grew weary of our customary -amusements, and though we had none of us done much walking since we left -England, we hailed the new idea with delight. The men refused to -accompany us (the English civilian in the East seems to forget how to -walk) so we went with only a servant or two to carry our cameras, -refreshments, and other necessities. - -We walked about five miles thro' the jungle, to a little native village -surrounded entirely by clumps of feathery bamboos, a most exquisite -spot. We climbed a neighbouring hill where stood the inevitable pagoda -and kyaung, and were rewarded by a perfect view. - -Our photographic intentions were unfulfilled, for as we were about to -focus our cameras, a jungle fire was set alight below, and the smoke, -drifting across the valley towards us most effectually obscured our -view. We were forced to be content with photographing one another, the -most beautiful substitutes we could find. - -We examined the pagoda, peeped into the kyaung, and tried to induce the -hpoongyi to come out and be photographed; but the pious man, evidently a -hermit, shut himself promptly into the inner recesses of his dwelling, -and continued to read in a loud voice until we had taken our departure. -We thought him unnecessarily suspicious, and should have been hurt had -we not felt it to be really rather a compliment to our charms. - -Our expedition was on the whole a success, but as we arrived home very -hot and tired, having lost our way once or twice, we failed to convince -the stay-at-homes that we had enjoyed ourselves without them. - -One morning early, my sister and I were startled by a succession of -shots which rang out close to the house. My brother was away in the -district, making an official tour among the villages under his charge, -so we were alone and unprotected. Hurrying to the window, what was our -astonishment to see a band of Goorkhas, under command of one of the -subalterns, of the detachment stationed at Remyo, defending our house -against an unseen enemy who lurked in the neighbouring jungle, and kept -up an incessant firing. My mind first flew to dacoits, then to French or -Chinese (I knew there had been trouble on the border), then, on catching -sight of one of the enemy, and recognising him also as a Goorkha, I knew -mutiny must have broken out. Trouble of this kind always breaks out -unexpectedly, I have heard. - -Soon however, we were forced to suppose that it must be a revolution, -for leading the enemy on to attack was the second of the two subalterns -of the detachment. It was difficult to believe that this usually shy and -retiring young man could be the leader of a disloyal rising, but there -he was, excitedly encouraging his followers to attack the house. - -We hastily prepared lint and bandages for the wounded, and watched with -beating hearts the progress of the fight. - -Suddenly, both sides ceased firing, the leaders advanced towards one -another, conversed amicably together, evidently settled their -differences, summoned their troops, and marched them home to breakfast. -It was a sham fight. - -This appears to be the favourite amusement of the officers who form the -military element of Remyo society. - -I was continually finding myself in the midst of desperate encounters -when taking my rides abroad. It was rather disconcerting at first, but I -grew accustomed to it in time, as one grows accustomed to anything, and -would ride along the line of fire, with a coolness and indifference -worthy of one of the old seasoned campaigners. - -I suppose to those who live in a military district, sham fights are -ordinary affairs, but I had never seen one before, and it struck me as -very ludicrous to see these men, in most desperate earnestness, -crouching in ambush, dodging behind trees, and crawling along under -cover to escape the fire of their foes. The little Goorkhas become -wildly excited, and it would not do to allow the two sides to come to -close quarters, or the sham fight might develop into a real one. - -The other European male inhabitants of Remyo, are the inevitable Indian -Civilian and "Bombay Burman," whom of course I should not presume to -analyse; two railway men (who seem superfluous as there is as yet no -railway), a P.W.D. (Public Works Department) man, whose work, it seems, -is to make roads (from my point of view as a cyclist they don't do him -credit), an Engineer, and the Policeman. - -This last was a mighty shikarri, who had hunted and shot every -imaginable animal; who knew the habits and customs of all the beasts of -the jungle, and after examining a "kill" would give a whole history of -the fight between the tiger and its victim. He was a mighty talker too, -and would converse for hours on any subject. - -What he could not accomplish was to speak for three minutes without -giving way to exaggeration; nor could he give an unvarnished reply to a -plain question, so that in Remyo "if you want to know the time _don't_ -ask a policeman" is the popular aphorism. - -The Engineer possessed the most striking characteristics amongst the men -of the place. I have never met a man so full of information. He was one -of those men who can give information on every conceivable subject, for -if he knows nothing about it, he will invent a few facts on the spur of -the moment, facts of which he is always justly proud. - -I never quite made up my mind whether his actions were the outcome of a -passion for practical joking, or a desire to be of use, but I try to -believe the latter. When I punctured my bicycle tyre he insisted upon -helping me to mend it. His process occupied the whole of an afternoon, -and the front veranda and drawing-room; beyond this, it was too -intricate to describe, except to say that it required all the available -tooth brushes in the house, three basins of water, and a rupee piece, -and necessitated, apparently, the cutting of a large hole in the inner -tube, with a patent tyre remover he had invented out of a broken -teaspoon. - -On another occasion, he assured us he had a splendid plan for preventing -our drawing room stove from smoking. We had been obliged to put a stove -in the drawing room to make up for the absence of a fire place; it was a -primitive affair, with a chimney that went through a hole in the wall, -and it smoked "somethink hawful." Our friend tried his plan and a dozen -others, each more wonderful and complicated than the last, and each -necessitating fresh holes in the already perforated wall. Each plan too, -resulted in increased volumes of smoke, and as the furniture and carpet -were being rapidly ruined, and our whilom happy home was being broken -up, we finally remedied the matter ourselves. - -But the matter wherein our Engineer excelled himself, was in the matter -of rose trees. - -Hearing us one day express a wish for a rose garden, he declared at -once that nothing was easier. He was departing for Rangoon in two days, -and he would there procure and send to us rose cuttings, which we must -plant in carefully prepared boxes of soil, follow the instructions which -he would give us concerning their welfare, and we should soon have -flourishing rose trees. Our gratitude was unbounded, we listened and -carefully noted his instructions, and after his departure eagerly -awaited the fulfilment of his promise. - -In a few days a coolie delivered at our house, what I took at first to -be twigs for fire wood, but on examining the letter accompanying them, I -discovered they were the promised rose cuttings. I felt some doubts -about them, but my sister had implicit faith in the Engineer (the stove -incident came later), and would not listen to me. - -So we planted the rose cuttings, and for six whole weeks did we tend -them. All the instructions we carried out to the letter, watering twice -daily and sheltering them from the sun by day, and from the cold dews by -night, but all to no avail. Dead sticks they were, and dead sticks they -remained, till at last convinced of the hopelessness of attempting to -restore life to the withered things, we tore them up in desperation and -burnt them. - -My sister's faith in the Engineer, however, remained still unshaken, and -she protested that the coolie must have lost the original bundle of rose -cuttings, and substituted these twigs in their place. For my part I -believe no such thing, and when I consider what passionate care and -tenderness we lavished on those unresponsive pieces of wood, I do indeed -feel disposed to "speak with many words." - -Varied though the characters and interests of the Remyo inhabitants may -be, in one particular they all agree, i.e. in their dislike of the -Casual Visitor. - -The casual visitor is supposed to ruin the servants, to monopolise the -tennis courts, and golf links, to abuse the privileges of honorary -membership of the club, to unjustly criticise the polo ground, and -generally to destroy the peace and harmony of the station. - -For the men, the advent of a lady visitor means calls, dinner parties, -and the necessity of wearing best clothes, which fills them with horror. -For the ladies, it means the advent of one who will possess the latest -fashions from Rangoon (possibly from England), who will throw into the -shade their gala costumes of the fashion of two years ago, who will -trespass upon their prerogatives, rival their powers at tennis and golf, -and generally interfere with their peaceful and innocent pursuits. - -The arrival of visitors, therefore, is not welcomed as a rule, and -though hospitably received and comfortably housed, they are not admitted -into the inner life of the station until they have shown themselves -quite innocent of the evil qualities which are imputed to them. - -This unexpected unfriendliness on the part of the Remyoans has been -brought about by the acts of two people, who once visited this happy -valley, and departed again leaving deeply rooted indignation behind -them. Of the first, a woman, it suffices to say that she amply justified -the suspicions of the Remyo ladies. Her name is never mentioned by them -without a significant look, and she is not a safe subject for -discussion. - -The crime of the second sinner against Remyo hospitality (a man) was of -a different nature, and it is perhaps difficult for the female mind to -grasp the enormity of the offence. - -A large tiger had made its appearance in the neighbourhood, and a tiger -shoot had been organised. All the arrangements were complete; the men -were sure of success, and speculated which of their number would have -the luck to kill. The evening before the shoot, a visitor on his way -from a remote station, arrived in Remyo, and obtained permission to -accompany the sportsmen. As he was reputed to be a very bad shot this -was readily given, and there was allotted to him a position well out of -the expected line of the beat. The tiger broke near the stranger's -tree, and he killed it with his first shot, the promoters of the shoot -never even getting a sight of the game. - -The criminal impertinence of a mere stranger daring to kill _their_ -tiger roused the deepest feelings of indignation among the Remyoans. The -laws of hospitality are above all, so the perpetrator of the crime was -allowed to escape with his life and the tiger skin, but since that day -strangers have been looked upon as suspicious interlopers, and -prospective tiger shoots are not discussed in presence of the Casual -Visitor. - -I have given my impressions of the Remyo society candidly, perhaps a -little too candidly; but lest any who read this book be disposed to hold -the latter opinion, let me say one thing more. - -The first, the last, and the most indelible impression left on my mind -by all the Anglo-Burmans whom I had the pleasure of meeting, was the -impression of a kindness, friendliness, and hospitality passing belief. -The Anglo-Burmans, while retaining the best qualities of the English -nation, seem to lose entirely that cold and suspicious reserve towards -strangers, of which we are often so justly accused. They appear to have -adopted those Eastern laws of hospitality, which lay so great a stress -on the duty of entertaining strangers, and they cannot do enough to -welcome those fellow countrymen who visit the land of their exile. - -This characteristic kindness of the Anglo-Burmans is so universally -acknowledged, that it is really superfluous to mention it, but as I -spent six months among them, without encountering a single unkind look, -word, or deed, I cannot let the opportunity pass without offering my -tribute of gratitude to this most kind-hearted and generous people. - - - - -CHAPTER VII. - -THE BURMESE. - - "We are merry folk who would make all merry as ourselves."--"Yeomen - of the Guard." - - -On my first evening in Remyo I was sitting in the drawing-room, waiting -for the announcement of dinner, when suddenly, the curtain across the -doorway was pulled aside, and a native peered into the room. His -movements were rapid and stealthy, and betokened a desire for escape or -concealment. On seeing me he slipped past the curtain into the room, and -crouched down, as tho' endeavouring to hide himself from without. Then -in the same bending attitude, he glided past the uncurtained window, -across the room where I sat lost in astonishment, and on reaching my -chair, sank on to his knees, placed his raised hands together in a -supplicating manner, and exclaimed in a deferential and prayerful voice -"Sarsiar."! - -For a moment I stared at him in wonder, unable to comprehend his -attitude; and then in a flash I understood all. - -He was in terrible danger, someone was pursuing him; to escape he had -slipped into the house, and was now imploring me to conceal or to defend -him. I had no thought of hesitation, whatever might be his crime he must -not be left to the rough justice of his pursuers, he must be protected -until the matter could be properly inquired into. - -I sprang up and hurried to the window to reconnoitre; four natives stood -in the road; no one else was in sight; perhaps the pursuers were already -in the house. - -"Sarsiar, sarsiar, thekinma," he repeated, (or something that sounded -like that). - -"All right, all right" I said soothingly: "don't be frightened, you're -safe here," and so saying I quietly bolted the outer door, fastened the -windows, and proceeded to put the room in a state of defence. My -presence of mind evidently astonished him, he stared at me a moment and -once more took up his cry of "Sarsiar, sarsiar". - -"It doesn't matter though a dozen Sarsiars are after you," I cried -impatiently: "you are quite safe here; so tell me who is this "Sarsiar," -and what have you done to him?" - -But the wretched man only became still more excited, he crouched lower -than ever, he waved his arms, and burst into a torrent of Burmese -eloquence, in which again and again, occurred the name of his pursuer, -of this much dreaded "Sarsiar." - -At last, being quite unable to either comprehend or calm him, I called -aloud to my sister to come and reassure him in his own tongue. She came, -exchanged a few hurried remarks with the fugitive, and then, to my utter -astonishment and indignation, burst out laughing. I angrily demanded an -explanation, and when she had recovered, she gave it. - -The native was no terrified victim, flying from a savage foe, but the -head boy announcing that dinner was ready! - -The stealthy walk, the crouched air of concealment, the supplicating -attitude, were merely expressions of respect, it being quite contrary -to the Burman's idea of politeness to raise his head above that of his -master. - -This excessive politeness on the part of the Burman is highly -commendable, but apt to be inconvenient. It is embarrassing to be waited -on by a man who persists in scuttling about with his body bent almost -double, and who sinks on his knees on every available occasion; it gives -him an air of instability. Some were so full of respect as to dismount -from their ponies and walk past the "Thekins" when they met us in the -road. It must delay business immensely, but no true Burman would allow -himself to be influenced by such a minor consideration. - -The Burman is much given to contemplation. He is frequently seized with -a fit of meditation in the midst of most important work, and will sit -for hours, immovable, gazing steadily into vacancy, puffing at his huge -cheroot, and thinking. - -So, history relates, did Socrates sit for three days and nights, but -Socrates, poor man, had no cheroot to soothe him. The results of -Socrates' meditation on that particular occasion are unknown; so too are -the results of the rapt meditations of the Burman. Never by word or deed -does he betray what thoughts occupy his mind on these ever recurring -occasions, but someday, who knows? he may be moved to speak, and then -where will be the wisdom of the East and of the West, when compared with -the wisdom of this contemplative nation? Surely it will become small and -of no account, and be no more thought on! - -For these fits of meditation are undoubtedly inspired! They may overtake -him at any time, absorbingly, unexpectedly, in a manner highly -inconvenient to all with whom he may come in contact. - -I say he is liable continually to such attacks, but certain -surroundings, and circumstances seem more conducive than others to such -contemplative meditation. - -For example, if despatched on an important message, such an attack -almost invariably seizes him, and the messenger will remain for hours, -seated by the road side lost in thought, while his impatient master -sits raging and fuming at home, waiting in vain for an answer to his -note. On such an occasion the Burman loses all sense of time, and his -expression of naive astonishment, and patient martyr-like sufferance, -when blamed for his delay, is utterly disarming. - -Again, the dusting of a room is most conducive to meditation. I have -frequently seen a native stand for half an hour or more, immovable, -duster in hand, gazing from the window, lost in abstraction. But this -trait, I am told by English housewives, is not confined to Burmese -servants alone. Dusting, I conclude, has a soothing effect on the -nerves. - -When the Burman does work, he works with an energy and violence which is -as astonishing as it is unnecessary. To see a loogalay in his energetic -movements, dusting or tidying a room is a lesson to sluggards. - -He takes his stand in the centre of the room, and performs a series of -wonderfully intricate and far reaching flag signals with the duster. -Then, after clearing away the broken china and other debris, he slowly -makes a tour of the room, striking violently at each article of -furniture once or twice with the corner of the afore-mentioned duster, -and shaking the same menacingly in the face of every picture and -ornament. Then he turns upside down the books and papers, carefully -hides his mistress's work bag, and his master's favourite pipe, -rearranges the furniture and the ornaments, which have come through -scatheless, to suit his own taste, and the room is finished. In the -matter of floor washing the Burman as a rule prefers to carry out the -precepts stated in Mr. Chevallier's song: "What's the good of anything? -Why nothing." To him it appears an act of supererogation to wash to-day -the floor, which must certainly be dirtied again on the morrow. - -But if he be induced, by the stern commands of his mistress to undertake -the task, then indeed is it a day of mourning and discomfort for the -whole household. No spring cleaning carried on by the most -uncompromising and unsympathetic British matron, can approach the misery -and upset caused by Burmese floor washing. - -Every male member of the establishment, from the coolie who is mending -the compound path, to the head boy, is recruited to the work, and -reinforcements of "brothers" from the village are called in to assist. -Every piece of furniture in the place is turned upside down, and then -large cans of water are upset "promiscuous like" here and there, until -the whole house is deluged. This accomplished, the concourse of servants -commences to paddle about the house, rescuing books and cushions from -the ravages of the flood, and flapping at the water with cloth and -brooms. No definite scheme is adopted, but the chief idea seems to be to -wet as much of the floor, walls, and furniture as possible. After this -amusement has been pursued for about three hours, the floods are swept -away through the drawing-room and out at the front door, and the damp -and exhausted servants, after proudly announcing: "Floor much clean -now, missis," retire triumphant, to rest their weary limbs for the -remainder of the day. We did not often indulge our desire for -cleanliness in this respect. - -The Burman is a great lover of ceremonies and processions. On certain -festival days long picturesque pageants wind thro' the villages on their -way to the pagodas; cart after cart drawn by gaily decorated bullocks -and filled with brightly dressed occupants, many of whom wear fancy -disguises, and dance and posture during the whole of the ride. - -It is a strange sight to see "grave and reverend seigneurs" from the -village, arrayed in the most extraordinary costumes, reminding one of an -English Guy Fawkes procession, standing at the front of a cart, -posturing and pulling faces, in a manner that would be ludicrous, were -it not so evidently full of meaning and solemnity. Imitation boats, -dragons and beasts of all sorts take part in these processions, which -for grotesqueness, brilliance of colour, and originality of arrangement -are equalled only in a Drury Lane pantomime or the Lord Mayor's Show. -But the soul of the Burman is not satisfied with his great half yearly -festivals, nor even with the smaller festivities that take place at -every birth, wedding, death, "ear-boring," or other ceremonious -occasion. He seeks ever for other opportunities for procession and -masquerade. - -Our Burmese servants found vent for their feelings in waiting at table. -They performed their duties with as much stateliness and ceremony as -time, and our impatient appetites would permit. - -No dish, plate, or spoon was brought without the co-operation of the -three loogalays who were in attendance, and the lord chamberlain himself -could not have conducted the course of the meal with more dignity than -did our Burmese butler. - -But the greatest triumph was achieved at breakfast time when we partook -of boiled eggs. The clink of the cups, followed by a hush of expectancy -heralded what was coming. The purdah would be drawn aside by an unseen -hand, and the procession would march solemnly into the room, the three -loogalays, one behind the other, bearing each in his hand a very large -dinner plate, in the centre of which stood a small egg in its humble -egg-cup. - -Into the room and round the table they would march, then dividing, each -with a bow deposited his precious burden before the person for whom it -was intended, after which the procession was again formed, and -disappeared slowly behind the curtain: all this with an air of solemnity -and display that would not have disgraced a royal levee. Why this -ceremony was confined to eggs, why the porridge and bacon were not -equally favoured I cannot tell, I merely state the facts as I observed -them, leaving the explanation to others more discerning than I. - -The greatest treat our own loogalays ever enjoyed in this respect was -brought about one day by a slight mistake I made in giving an order to -Po-Sin, the head butler. My grasp of the language being but slight, my -speech was often a trifle faulty, but I gave orders with a vigorous -confidence, and aided by gesture and "pigeon English" I imagined that I -made myself tolerably comprehensible. On the occasion to which I refer, -I had prepared my sentence elaborately, and summoning Po-Sin, I informed -him that his master would be at home and would want tea at three -o'clock. There must have been some mistake somewhere. Possibly, I -confused the word meaning "office" with the Burmese for "three o'clock." -But whatever be the explanation, about a quarter of an hour later, -chancing to look out of the window, I beheld a procession winding its -way along the road to the Court House, and bearing with it our afternoon -tea equipage displayed to the highest advantage. At the head marched -Po-Sin, proudly brandishing the teapot, then Po-Mya bearing the muffins, -Po Thin with the tray and tea-cups, and behind, in regular order, the -other numerous members of our establishment, each bearing some dish, -jug, or spoon. They had gone too far to be overtaken, tho' they walked -with becoming dignity, so with deep foreboding, I watched them disappear -round the corner of the road leading to the Court House. - -Presently I saw the disconcerted procession returning, headed this time -by my infuriated brother-in-law, who had been interrupted in the midst -of an important case, by the solemn entrance of the tea bearers. The -servants looked depressed and disappointed. I think they had hoped the -procession might be a weekly affair. Like "Brer Rabbit," I prudently lay -low until my brother's wrath had exhausted itself. - -The Burman has the reputation of being a keen sportsman, and certainly, -his excitement is intense on every sporting occasion, especially in -games of strength and skill. But he does not excel in these. His -intentions are doubtless good, but he lacks pluck and determination. - -This is especially evident when a loogalay fields for his master at -cricket. He will watch the game with deepest interest, loudly applauding -every hit, and when the ball speeds in his direction his excitement and -pride are unbounded. He runs to meet it with outstretched arms, shouting -wildly, then, as the ball nears him, and the audience hold their -breath, expecting a wonderful catch or piece of fielding, he quietly -steps aside, allows the ball to fly past him, and then trots gently -after it, overtaking it some few yards over the boundary. His fellow -natives view the performance with pride, and yell with admiration when -he finally secures the ball and, carrying it within an easy throwing -distance of the pitch, rolls it gently back to the bowler. - -The interest taken by the natives in football is overpowering, and a -spectator has been known to stick a knife into the calf of one of the -most active of the players on the opposing side, who happened to be -standing near the "touch line." A new and unexpected source of danger in -the football field. - -The two chief drawbacks to the Burman servant are, firstly, his intense -self-satisfaction and conceit, and secondly, his intolerable -superstition. - -It is impossible to find fault with a Burman. He receives all complaints -with a look of such absolute astonishment and reproach that the -complainant is at once disarmed. In his own eyes the Burman can do no -wrong, and if other folk do not entirely concur in this opinion, that is -their misfortune and not his fault. He is always quite pleased with -himself, and regards with a pitying contempt all who are not equally so. - -Overpowering superstition is a deeply rooted characteristic of the race, -and I rather suspect, a very convenient one occasionally. The Burman -will do nothing on an unlucky day or hour, and in awaiting the -propitious moment, the duty is frequently left undone altogether. This -is apt to be inconvenient to others, if the duty in question be the -delivery of an important message, or the preparation of dinner. But I -have sometimes wondered whether this particular superstition might not -advantageously be introduced into England, where it would be so -exceedingly useful to the school boy at the end of the holidays, and to -many other folk besides. - -In private life the Burman carries his superstition to a ridiculous -extent. No ceremony can take place, no festival be held, the building -of a house cannot even be commenced until the wise man has declared the -hour and place to be propitious. - -All sorts of magical contrivances to prevent the entrance of wicked -"nats" and other evil spirits, are erected outside nearly every house -and village, and charms and horoscopes are believed in absolutely by all -save the best educated Burmans. - -They are a fickle people. Their lives being uneventful they love to vary -them by constant small changes, and to enliven them by the excitement of -gambling, which is the great vice of the country. We had a Burmese maid -who displayed this love of change to a most astonishing degree. After -being with us about two months she suddenly announced one morning that -she had fever and must go and rest. Accordingly she disappeared for -several days, and when we sent to enquire after her we learnt that she -had recovered from her attack of fever, but was coming back to us no -more, as she had got married. In about a fortnight she reappeared, -saying calmly that she was now tired of being married, and was quite -ready to return to her work after her little change. - -Though he strongly objects to work himself the Burman likewise objects -to see anyone else work. Whenever I endeavoured to clean my bicycle, our -loogalays were terribly grieved. They sought me out in the quiet corner -to which I had retired, and stood round me with the most shocked -expressions, waving brooms and dusters, and beseeching me by all their -most expressive gestures to leave the task to them. Sometimes they -embarrassed me so much by all these attentions that I was obliged to -consent, but always felt sorry afterwards; they are not satisfactory -bicycle cleaners. The handle bars they polished again and again, but the -rest of the machine struck them as uninteresting, and they left it -severely alone. - -My experience of the Burman was not confined altogether to our own -servants, there were many in the village with whom I had a bowing -acquaintance, but owing to my ignorance of the language I could not -hope to become intimate with them and their families. - -They appeared to take a great interest in us and our possessions. Two -little Burmese ladies in particular, wives of the chief men of the -village, paid us constant visits. They would bring us presents of -flowers and vegetables, offer these, and then sit on the floor and stare -resolutely at us for the space of half an hour, at the end of which time -they would suddenly make a profound obeisance and depart. - -Conversation was impossible, as neither party knew the other's language, -but we found this silent contemplation so embarrassing, that, after -enduring it twice, we endeavoured on the third visit to entertain them -by showing them pictures, trinkets, or anything we thought might amuse -them. But with no great success; they admired the things and then -immediately returned to their former occupation of staring, until at -last I thought of the piano (which at that time was still in a healthy -condition), opened it, and began to play. That interested them -immensely, as they could not understand whence the sound came. They -would stand happily for any length of time, gingerly striking a note, -and listening to the tone with the greatest wonder and delight. - -But what pleased them more than anything was a china doll, belonging to -my little niece, which shut and opened its eyes. Such a marvel had never -been seen before, and the day after our visitors had discovered it, a -large deputation from the village waited upon us, with a request to see -the wonder. As from that time the doll frequently disappeared for a day -or two, we rather suspected the ayah was turning an honest penny, by -borrowing it to hire out for exhibition at various villages round, -whither the rumour of its fame had already spread. - -Our visitors took the greatest interest in our garments, and when their -first shyness had worn off, would subject our costumes to a minute -examination that was a little trying. - -They always arrayed themselves in their best garments when they came to -see us, and very dainty they looked in their bright dresses of pink, -green, or yellow silk, with flowers and ornaments in their black hair. -The Burmese ladies are deservedly described as charming, and they -understand the art of dress, and blending colours to perfection. They -are reported to be very witty and amusing, as well as charming in -appearance, and certainly when my brother happened to be at home on the -occasion of their visits, they chattered to him very merrily, and seemed -to thoroughly enjoy their talk with an Englishman. - -Another visitor of ours was the thugyi, (the head man of the village), a -very fine looking old man with one of the handsomest heads I have ever -seen. He was taller than the majority of Burmans, and in the flowing -white garments which he always wore, presented a splendid picture which -I longed to paint. His manners were stately and dignified, and he -treated us with the most royal courtesy, as though he were an emperor -at least. - -The chief hpoongyi (priest) of Remyo was a dear old man, with a -beautifully tender expression. At his invitation we all went to visit -him one day, and he showed us over the kyaung, with its numerous images, -bell, and quaint pictures of saints and devils. He was an enthusiastic -gardener and showed us proudly over his domain, giving us much advice on -the management of plants, and offering to transplant anything we admired -to our own garden. A hpoongyi's life must be very peaceful and happy, -though perhaps a trifle dull. His chief occupation seems to be -meditation, which to us western folk appears distinctly monotonous. - -Visits to the native bazaar afford endless amusement. Natives of all -descriptions are gathered there, and the scene is most varied. The -picturesque Burmans, giggling Chinese, chattering Madrassees, stately -Parsees, solemn-faced Shans, and many other nationalities, swarm in the -narrow streets and round the stalls of the bazaar. The stalls are large -platforms raised about three feet from the ground, with overhanging -roofs. The seller sits in the middle of his stall with his wares spread -round him, and keeps up a running flow of conversation the whole day -long. - -There never appeared to be much to purchase in the Remyo bazaar except a -few silks and the most unpalatable looking foods, but I delighted to go -there in order to watch the people. "Bazaar day," to the Burman is one -big joke, and he enjoys it thoroughly. The girls wear their most -becoming costumes, and seated in the midst of their lovely silks, form a -picture dainty enough to attract any man's attention. They are charming, -and are quite aware of the fact. - -I ventured down once or twice to the bazaar with my camera, but they did -not understand it, and regarded me with suspicion; indeed, the mother of -one little Shan laddie, whose picture I wished to take, worked herself -up into such a state of wrath and terror that I was obliged to desist. I -fancy she thought I was bewitching the poor little fellow. - -My private opinion is, that in revenge for my attempt on her son, she -must have induced one of their wise men to curse my kôdak, for though I -took photographs with great vigour and confidence during my travels, not -a single one of them developed. It is a singularly distressing -employment to sit long hours in a stuffy dark room, developing -photographs which steadily refuse to develop. I have met with many sad -experiences in my long and chequered career, but I think this was the -most disappointing. - - -My one attempt at shopping by gesture in the bazaar was not an -unqualified success. I selected an aged and kindly looking stall keeper, -and proceeded to collect together in a heap the few small articles I -desired to purchase. During this proceeding she watched my actions with -astonishment and some suspicion, but the latter feeling was set at rest -when I produced a rupee and offered it to her. She took it, and while -she sought the change, I pocketed my purchases. - -[Illustration: NATIVE BAZAAR AT REMYO] - -But when she returned, her face expressed the greatest consternation, -and she burst into a torrent of Burmese. Quite at a loss to understand -her, I hurriedly offered her more money, but she refused it with scorn, -and continued her explanations and entreaties, in which the numerous -spectators of the scene presently joined, laughing as though it were the -greatest joke in the world. - -Presently the old lady picked up a bobbin of cotton, such as I had just -bought, and waved it frantically in my face; I mechanically took it and -pocketed it also. At this action on my part the spectators became still -more hilarious, but the old lady looked annoyed, evidently considering -the matter was getting beyond a joke. - -At last, in desperation, I pulled out all my purchases and flung them on -the stall. To my astonishment this proved to be precisely what she -desired; the good lady beamed with satisfaction, gathered them together -with her own fair hands, and returned them, and my change, to me with -many bows and smiles. I do not know to this day what was the reason of -her excitement. Judging by the intense amusement it caused the -spectators, I should say the story will serve as a popular after dinner -anecdote for many generations of Burmans. - - -I do not think anyone but a Burman could find much amusement in their -dearly beloved Pwés. The dances, composed entirely of posturing and -grouping, are most monotonous, and the music is distinctly an unpleasant -noise from a European point of view. Yet these easily satisfied folk -crowd to such entertainments (which occasionally last many days) and -camp out round the temporary building in which they are performed. They -seem to derive the greatest enjoyment from watching these interminable -performances, following the inevitable dramatic "Prince and Princess" -through their adventures, and chuckling over the vulgar jokes of the -clown. - -The Burman loves to laugh. He is as equally amused at a fire or a -drowning fatality in real life, as when in the play the clown trips up -a fellow actor. - -His proneness to laughter is annoying sometimes, especially if one -misses a drive at golf, or falls down stairs (either of which -misfortunes appear to him very droll) but on the whole his keen -appreciation of "humour" helps him very comfortably through life. - -We modern Europeans may think we have a higher sense of humour than -these simple folk; but who is to judge? - -The Burman is, perhaps, after all that truest philosopher who finds -latent humour in all things, and makes the most of it--still, I pray -that, for his sake, his keenness of appreciation may not become more -highly developed, or some day he will meet a pun, and it will kill him. - - - - -CHAPTER VIII. - -ENTERTAINING. - - "Thou didst eat strange flesh - Which some did die to look on." - - -Entertaining is nervous work, as all the world knows. The anxiety is -considerably increased in a small country station like Remyo, because -one cannot be sure that the rats will not devour the food beforehand, or -that the cook will not take that opportunity of having "fever," a polite -synonym for getting drunk, much in use among Burman servants. - -The dinner party is the most general form of entertainment in Remyo, but -not of very frequent occurrence; the reasons being, the limited number -of available guests and the restricted nature of the menu. No sane -person would dream of inviting another sane person to dine upon nothing -but Burmese chicken, even displayed in various disguises from soup to -savoury. - -Once a week beef can be obtained, so dinner parties are usually given -on "beef days." Should an invitation arrive for another date, great -excitement prevails as to what special delicacy has been procured. - -Once we were presented with a peacock, and gave a dinner party to -celebrate the event, the peacock itself being the chief item of the -celebration. Our guests arrived full of anticipation of some unknown -treat; we received them "big with pride." - -But alas! the vanity of human hopes. During the early part of the -dinner, over the chicken entrées, the conversation turned upon the -relative merits as food of various kinds of fowl. One of our guests, a -man full of information on every subject, interesting and otherwise, -suddenly announced cheerfully: - -"One bird I may tell you is not fit for human food, and that bird is a -peacock." - -Thereupon ensued an awful pause, in the midst of which the servants -entered, carrying the peacock in all its glory. - -Nothing could be done. The bird was shorn of its tail, so to relieve -our guest's mind we alluded to it as "goose," but no one could have been -for an instant deceived. And the worst of it was, our guest was quite -right, it was not fit for human food. - -Another source of anxiety on giving a dinner party in Remyo is the -decoration of the table. A Burmese loogalay has his own ideas about -table decorations, and these ideas he will carry out, even if to do so -obliges him to leave all his other work undone. In vain we may try to -explain that we prefer to arrange the flowers ourselves, he looks -pained, waits till we have completed our arrangements and have retired -to dress, and then pounces upon the table and places his own elaborate -decorations on the top of what we fondly imagined a triumph of artistic -arrangement. - -And his decorations are indeed elaborate; round every piece of glass, -china, or cutlery he weaves a marvellous pattern, sometimes in bits of -bracken, sometimes in coloured beads or rice, and occasionally in rose -petals. When all is finished, the table looks like a kaleidoscope, and -one is afraid to move a spoon or glass lest the design be destroyed. - -On Christmas eve a large and important dinner party was given by some -old inhabitants of the station. All the Europeans were invited, and it -was intended that the evening should be spent in jovial and merry games -like a typical Christmas eve at home. But alas! never was an -entertainment beset with greater difficulties. - -In the first place, nearly all the guests upon whom we most depended for -amusement sent word that they had fever. We suspected that fever at the -time, and suspected it still more next day, when we heard of a jovial -bachelor gathering that same evening in the house of one of the stricken -ones. - -Then the weather was not cheering. It was a terribly cold night, and the -houses in Remyo, being mostly of Government design, consequently the -same for both hills and plains, are not calculated to keep out the -cold; there are large chinks in the unpapered walls, and few of the -doors and windows will shut. In this particular house there was no fire -place, only a small stove which gave out about as much warmth as a -spirit kettle. We all felt grateful to our host and hostess for their -hospitality, and did our best to be entertained and entertaining in our -turn, but it is hard to keep up a cheerful appearance and jovial -spirits, in evening dress, in a mat house, with no fire and the -temperature almost down to freezing point. - -We played games such as "Kitchen Furniture" and "Family Post" which -necessitated plenty of movement, and gave every one in turn an -opportunity of occupying the chair by the stove. - -That part of the evening which I enjoyed most was when I made the mulled -claret. I had no idea how to make it, but I should obtain uninterrupted -possession of the stove during the operation, so I volunteered for the -task. I put the claret, and anything suitable and "Christmassy," I could -think of, into a saucepan, and stirred it over the stove until the -other guests became suspicious, and I was forced to abandon my warm -post. - -I did not like the result at all, and I noticed the other guests lost -interest in it as a drink after the first sip, though they clung to -their glasses, using them as impromptu hand warming pans. - -But what proved the greatest check upon the enjoyment of the evening was -the great anxiety of the guests for the welfare of the furniture. - -Our host and hostess were on the point of leaving the station, and as is -the custom, had sold their furniture to the other residents, though they -retained it in their house until departure. Now when one has just -bought, and paid for, say, a set of drawing room chairs, or china -ornaments, one does not enjoy seeing the former subjected to the rough -usage of a game of "Bumps" nor the latter endangered by a game of Ball. -Consequently, each and all were busily engaged during the evening in -protecting their prospective possessions, and had little opportunity of -abandoning themselves to enjoyment. - -One very amusing instance of this was the behaviour of the new owners of -the carpet. It was a poor carpet, old, faded, and thread-bare, but it -was the only carpet in the station and the recent purchasers regarded it -with pride. They looked anxious all the evening, when chairs were -dragged about over weak spots, and peg glasses were placed in dangerous -proximity to restless feet. - -But the climax of their concern was reached when "Snap dragon" was -proposed. The game was hailed with delight by every one (there really is -a little imaginary warmth in the flame), but the contempt of the -carpet-owners was unbounded. They said nothing, but looked volumes; they -did not join in the game, but crawled about the ground round the -revellers, busily engaged in picking up the numerous raisins scattered -on the floor, forcibly holding back feet which threatened to crush the -greasy fruit, and showing by all means in their power that they -considered "Snap dragon" a most foolish amusement. - -Small wonder, considering all these disadvantageous circumstances, that -the Christmas party was not an unqualified success, and that the cold -and weary guests, plodding home in the early hours of Christmas morning, -mentally vowed that such wild dissipation was not good for them and -should never again be repeated. - -Dances are necessarily unknown in such a small station as Remyo. An -energetic bachelor did once make an effort to give one, but as the only -available room was the ticket office at the railway station, the only -available music the bagpipes of the Goorkhas, and the only available -ladies five in number, he was reluctantly obliged to abandon the -project. - -A much enduring form of entertainment in Remyo is the musical afternoon, -or evening party. The inhabitants assemble in turns at one of the three -houses which boast a piano; but the repertoire of the combined station -is limited, and as every one expects to sing on these occasions -(ignorance of time and tune being considered no drawback), and further, -intends to sing one or other of the few songs most popular in the -station, things are not in any sense as harmonious as they should be. - -This great eagerness to perform entailed much manoeuvring to obtain -first possession of the piano, and it was amusing to watch the -expressions of mingled indignation and scorn on the faces of others less -fortunate, when they recognised the prelude to what they each claimed as -their own particular song. - -The singer's triumph, however, was not without compensating -disadvantages, his efforts being assisted by a distinctly audible chorus -in undertone which would cling to him throughout the song in spite of -his endeavours to throw off the encumbrance by means of abrupt changes -of tempo, and variations in the air; and this professed appreciation of -the performance evoked from the singer such gratitude as one would -expect under the circumstances. - -No! On the whole we did not "entertain" much in Remyo; we contented -ourselves with quiet, domestic lives, enlivened but occasionally by such -outbursts of wild revelry as I have described. - -[Illustration: Decoration] - - - - -CHAPTER IX. - -ADVENTURES. - - "Things are seldom what they seem"--"H.M.S. Pinafore." - - "I haven't braved any dangers, but I feel as if I knew all about - it"--(Rudyard Kipling.) - - -But all this time I am wandering from the real subject of this book, -_i.e._, myself and my adventures, and as wandering from the straight -path is an unpardonable error, it behoves me to return speedily to my -subject, and recount a few of the soul-stirring incidents which befell -me during some of my many bicycling expeditions alone into the depths of -the jungle. - -This bicycling out of sight of human habitation, into the depths of the -jungle, sounds rather a brave and fearless proceeding, so I will not -correct the statement, but in parenthesis, as it were, I will remark -that once only did I venture more than half a mile from Remyo, and that -whenever I had turned the corner of the circular road, which shut out -the last view of my brother's house, my heart sank, and I became a prey -to the most agonising fears. Every instant I expected a tiger to bound -upon me from the jungle at the side of the road, a cobra to dart out its -ugly head from the overhanging branch of a tree, or a body of dacoits to -pounce down upon me and carry me off to their lair in triumph. My mind -was filled with useless speculation as to whether I and my bicycle would -be swifter than a panther, and with what "honeyed words of wisdom" I -should best allay the wrath of the "Burman run amuck," should fate throw -one of these in my way. - -I derived no pleasure from that lonely mile and a half of the circular -road, which must be traversed before again arriving at the haunts of -civilisation; I never entered upon it without a shiver of nervous -expectation, or left it behind without a sigh of relief, and yet I was -forced by my overweening craving for adventure, to ride out at every -opportunity to explore this dreary waste of jungle! Like the great -"Tartarin" of "Tarasconnasian" memory, my "Don Quixote" spirit drove me -to seek adventures, however gruesome, while my "Sancho Panza" mind ever -timidly pined for home and safety. - - -The first time my Quixotic expectations were fulfilled, was one evening -when I was riding later than usual. The sun had set, and the short -eastern twilight was rapidly darkening into night. I was cycling along -quickly, eager to reach home before being overtaken by the gathering -darkness, when suddenly, on turning a corner of the road, I saw, about a -hundred yards in front of me, a long black thing, presumably a python, -stretching half across the road, and curving up its huge head, as though -ready to attack. - -I do not suppose any bicycle ever stopped so abruptly as mine did at -that moment, and I must confess that my descent from the machine was -rapid rather than graceful. - -After I had sorted myself and the bicycle, I stood up, my senses -somewhat steadied by the sudden contact with mother earth, and -considered the situation. The python did not appear to have moved much, -and had, apparently, as yet taken no notice of my appearance; could it -be asleep? I suppose pythons do sleep sometimes? - -If I turned back, behind me lay three miles and more of jungle bordered -road, full of endless possible dangers, which must be traversed before -reaching safety, and it was growing so dark. In front, if I could but -pass the python, I had but a quarter of a mile to ride and I should be -in Remyo. I felt that I positively dared not face that long, dark, ride -back; but dare I face the python? It still made no sign of movement; but -possibly it was shamming sleep. - -Then suddenly there came to me in my need, not a mysterious voice, but a -timely recollection. It was a recollection of one of the stories told me -by the versatile policeman; a story of how he had behaved successfully -under similar circumstances, except that in his case the obstacle was a -leopard. I determined to follow his example. - -Summoning all my courage to assist me in performing this fearsome deed, -I mounted my bicycle, and with beating heart and trembling limbs, I rode -straight towards the reptile, ringing my bell, shouting, and making as -much noise and commotion as possible. Straight on I rode, almost -desperate with fear,----and then suddenly I ceased to shout, I stayed my -reckless pace, and finished my ride in gloomy silence, for on nearer -inspection the mighty python, the object of all my terror, turned out to -be nothing more alarming than the fallen branch of a tree. - -Another adventure (which but for my habitual prudence might have ended -more seriously) befell me at almost exactly the same spot, but in the -day time. I was riding along cheerfully, feeling particularly brave, -when suddenly I beheld about a quarter of a mile in front of me three -strange beasts. - -They rather resembled to my mind rhinoceri, but each had two horns. I -had never seen them before (I have no particular desire ever to see them -again) and I had not the least notion what they might be; whether wild -beasts of the jungle or tame household pets, but their personal -appearance rather suggested the former. I dismounted hastily, and -considered the matter. I did not wish to appear cowardly, even to my -bicycle; on the other hand, being of a peaceful nature, I had no desire -to enter into a hand-to-hoof struggle with three utterly unknown -quantities. - -On they came, usurping the whole of the road, with a sort of -"push-me-aside-if-you-dare" look about them, which I found particularly -unpleasant. Their gait was rolling and pompous, but they occasionally -relieved the monotony of their progress by prodding one another -playfully with their horns. This engaging playfulness of disposition did -not appeal to me. - -But I remembered the python incident, and scorned my fears, I would go -on and face the beasts. I remounted, looked again at the horns of the -advancing animals, thought of my family and friends, and then, somehow, -my bicycle seemed to turn round by itself, and I found myself speeding -as quickly in the opposite direction as any record breaker who ever -rode. - -On arriving home, I casually mentioned what I had encountered, and -learned that my friends were "water buffalos," animals of the mildest -disposition unless roused, but when roused, most unpleasant to -encounter. They have frequently been known to pick up a dog with their -horns, and break its bones over their backs. They can pick a mosquito -off their backs with the tip of their horns, in fact they are quite -skilled in the use of the latter, and had I not luckily decided to ride -in the opposite direction when I encountered these enterprising beasts, -they would, doubtless, have experienced no difficulty whatever in -puncturing my tyre! - -Ostensibly, their duty in this life is to draw the plough, but in -reality they fulfil a far higher mission. To them, and to them only, it -is given to draw contempt upon the superiority of the Anglo Indian: to -compass the fall of the mighty. - -For no sooner does a European appear riding in his pride by the river -bed, where the water buffalo lies wallowing in the mud, than all the -worst passions awake in the breast of the afore mentioned water -buffalo, and he is instantly aroused to anger. He leaves the delights of -the mud bath, and starts in pursuit of the white face, no matter who he -may be. "Tell it not in Gath" but the water buffalo, being no respector -of persons, has even been known to put to ignominious flight the "Indian -Civilian" and the "Bombay Burman." The pursuit is long and determined, -the attack almost inevitable, unless the pursued be rescued by the -opportune advent of a native, for to the water buffalo the word of the -Burman is law, while the word of the Anglo Indian is a mere nothing. - -This then, "the scorning of the great ones," would seem to be the -purpose of the water buffalos upon this earth. "How are the mighty -fallen"! when the highest among the ruling race must trust for rescue to -the interference of a five year old Burman. - - -One day, late in the afternoon, I sallied forth on my bicycle to a spot -half a mile down the Mandalay road, where I had noticed a specially -beautifully blossomed wild cherry tree. My intention was to rob the tree -of its treasure, and bear the blossom home in triumph to decorate our -drawing room for a dinner party that evening. - -The place was quite deserted, so finding I could not reach the blossoms -from the ground, I leant my bicycle against the tree trunk, and after -much scrambling, and one or two falls, I succeeded in climbing the tree, -and began to gather the flowers. - -So absorbed was I in my two-fold task of holding on to my precarious -perch, and breaking the branches of blossom, that I did not notice what -was going on below. Imagine then my horror and astonishment, on looking -down, to find my tree surrounded by about a dozen of the most -extraordinary looking natives I had ever beheld. Their clothing was most -scanty and they were covered from head to foot with elaborate "tattoo." -They wore tremendously large Shan hats, their hair was long and matted, -their teeth were red with betel juice, and most of them were armed with -long Burmese "dahs" (knives). They had come silently along the road out -of the jungle, and now stood in a circle round my tree, pointing, -staring, and chattering vigorously in an unknown tongue. - -Evidently I had fallen into the hands of a band of dacoits, and to judge -by their appearance, they were gloating over their capture. - -It was no dream this time--I assured myself of that by a series of -violent and judicious pinches; no! it was grim, very grim, earnest. -Escape appeared impossible. I told them in as much strong English as I -could remember, to go away, but they neither understood nor heeded. I -tried to recollect my Burmese, but could only remember words referring -to food, and thought it better not to put that idea into their heads; -they might be cannibals. I tried one or two shouts, but that made no -impression on them. There seemed no hope; they still stood there, -pointing and grinning savagely; they had evidently no intention of -relinquishing their prey. - -Then, trying to smile in a nervous and conciliatory manner, I slowly -descended the tree. How I longed for false teeth, a glass eye, a wooden -leg, or some other modern invention, with which people in books of -adventure are wont to overawe the natives who thirst for their blood. -Alas! I had nothing of the sort. - -I could not, obviously, sit in the tree all night, so sadly and -doubtfully I descended to throw myself on their mercy. - -I reached the ground, and stood with my eyes shut waiting the end. - -The end showed no intention of coming, so I opened my eyes, and -discovered to my astonishment that not I but my bicycle was the object -of all this attention. I was to them a matter of no interest whatever, -but the cycle they could not understand. - -Joyous with relief I hurriedly demonstrated the workings of my bicycle -to this party of, not dacoits, but most harmless wood cutters, and then -mounting rode away, followed for some distance by an awe-struck and -admiring crowd. My fears as usual were unfounded, but the drawing room -was not decorated with cherry blossom that or any other evening. - -It is difficult, for those to whom the bicycle is now as common as -blackberries, to imagine the astonishment with which the natives view -the machine for the first time. In Remyo itself bicycles were well -known, but frequently on the roads I met strangers from neighbouring -villages, and the astonishment and terror depicted on their faces when -they beheld me riding on this unknown thing was almost laughable. They -would fall back into the ditch with their mouths open, and remain -staring after me as long as I was in sight. - -Once, I remember, I and another lady rode out to a little village in the -jungle about three miles from Remyo. The road, a mere jungle track, was -awful, but we succeeded at last in arriving at our destination. We left -our cycles in the compound of the "hpoongyi kyaung," and climbed a -neighbouring hill to see a quaint pagoda, which crowned its top. After -thoroughly examining the pagoda, and the numerous images which surround -it, we returned to our cycles. - -What was our astonishment to find the entire population of the village -assembled in the compound, all having apparently taken up their -positions there, preparatory to seeing some entertainment. The Head of -the village approached us humbly, and in a long speech explained that -though he (evidently a travelled gentleman) had told his subordinates -all about the wonderful machines we rode, yet they would not believe -him. Would we, as a great condescension, mount and ride round the -compound, that all might see that his words were true. - -Willing to oblige him, I consented at once, mounted, and did a little -"gymkhana business," rather cleverly, I thought, considering the rough -ground. Imagine my astonishment and indignation, when the whole audience -became convulsed with merriment, hearty, overwhelming merriment, rolling -on the ground, and shrieking with laughter. I cannot explain the reason -of it; I suppose they looked upon me as a sort of travelling acrobat, -and their laughter was a sign of approbation of my tricks. But I was -very angry. I had not gone out to Burmah to become the laughing stock -of ignorant natives, so I said a hasty farewell to the "Thugyi," who -seemed quite pleased with the reception his companions gave me, and rode -out of the compound and away, followed by the amused shrieks of my -audience. I would have shaken the dust of that village from my feet, but -that is a difficult thing to achieve successfully on a bicycle. - -The Burmans are a merry folk, but methinks at times their humour carries -them too far. - -[Illustration: Decoration] - - - - -CHAPTER X. - -BEASTS AND REPTILES. - - The animals came in one by one - Till Noah, he thought they would never have done. - - And they all came into the Ark. - For to get out of the rain. - - -Rats! Hamlin Town (with Bishop Hatto thrown in) cannot offer a -comparison with our sufferings from these pestilent vermin. - -During the day time they contented themselves with playing in twos and -threes about the house, getting in the way of our feet, and generally -making themselves a nuisance. But at night when we had retired to rest, -they came in their hundreds, from their homes beneath the house, and to -use an expressive Americanism "simply bought the place." - -I am not naturally a "Mrs. Gummidge," but in this instance I am certain -I suffered more than any others in Remyo. Why the rats should have -preferred my room I know not, but undoubtedly they did. They gave balls -every night on my dressing table, and organised athletic sports, chiefly -hurdle races, on the floor. They had glorious supper parties on my -trunks, leaving the whole place scattered with half-eaten walnuts, bits -of biscuit, and morsels of cheese. They had concerts and debating -societies in the still hours of the night, brawls and squabbles at all -times; and true to tradition, made nests inside my Sunday hats, helping -themselves to such of my finery as took their fancy. - -As I have said, they came in their hundreds, and I was powerless against -them. In vain did I sit up in bed and "shoo" and clap my hands, they -would pause for an instant, as the revellers in Brussels paused when -they heard the cannon of Quatre Bras, then: "On with the dance let joy -be unconfined, no sleep till morn when rats and walnuts meet," and the -noise would become more deafening than ever. I think they grew to enjoy -my "shooings;" "the more noise the merrier" was evidently their motto; -but one night when I dozed off after making myself particularly -disagreeable, a large rat sprang upon my pillow, tore aside the mosquito -curtains, and hit me violently with its tail. They are revengeful -creatures. - -And what appetites they had? Poison they scoffed at, but ate everything -else that was not soldered up in tin boxes, (from our Christmas pudding, -to the Baby's pelisses, and my best gloves). Their most criminal act of -depredation, was in regard to my brother's pipe. It was a beautifully -grained pipe which I took out from England for a Christmas present. On -Christmas Eve the rats penetrated into the drawer where I kept it, tore -away the wrappings, and set to work. In the morning nothing was left but -the stem, the perforated and jagged remains of the bowl, and a little -heap of chawed bits of wood. My brother was very angry when I broke the -news to him, but it wasn't my fault, they were his rats; he ought to -have had them under better control. - -We got a dog, but he was useless. He was a pariah puppy, of respectable -parents; a cheery, popular fellow, who had so many evening engagements -among his friends in the village, that he could scarcely ever spare a -night at home; and during the day time he mostly slept. My sister and I -both disliked him, she because he would worry the Baby's legs, I because -he developed such an unbounded devotion to my shoes. - -He never attached himself to other shoes in this way, but mine he would -not leave alone. He carried some off every day and hid them behind the -furniture, or if he had a quiet ten minutes to himself, he buried them -in the compound. Many a long lost shoe did we discover when turning out -the drawing room, or digging up the flower beds. The others were amused -at this frolicsome trait, but it was rather a stupid joke really. - -I was assured by the inhabitants of Remyo that mosquitos are unknown -there during the cold weather. If this be really the case, there must -have been a special pilgrimage, and obviously I was the object of their -attentions. Fresh from England, they welcomed me with a delight that -ought to have been highly gratifying; nor could they do enough to show -their unbounded appreciation of me. I obtained mosquito curtains, but I -suppose I was clumsy in the manipulation of them, for I spent many a -lively night in the company of two or three enthusiasts who kept me -awake by their odious "ping-ping" song, and their still more odious -attentions. - -There is a district in Burmah, I am told, where the cattle are provided -with mosquito curtains, and I can quite believe it, for if they can be -so obnoxious in the hills in the cold weather, what must they be in the -plains in the heat! All creatures have their work in this world, and I -suppose the mosquito was created to subdue female vanity; one cannot -well be vain with such a complexion as they gave me. - -But let me quit this melancholy subject; it is impossible to be jocular -with a mosquito, and strong language would be out of place in this book. - -Rats are not the only creatures in Remyo with whom we were forced to -share our meals. The place abounds in ants, beetles, and "creeping -things innumerable," and all these must live; which necessity we -recognised, but wished they could live elsewhere. - -On the whole, I think the ant is the most objectionable of insects. -There is a Burmese fable concerning an ant and a lion which tells how -the ant was rewarded for assistance rendered to the lion, by receiving -permission to go everywhere, and so that this prerogative may be fully -exercised, the ant has, apparently, been gifted with matchless ingenuity -in devising means to overcome all obstacles. Amongst other -accomplishments it must have acquired the art either of swimming, flying -or bridge building, for even the dishes of water, in the centre of which -we placed our meals, were ineffectual. - -The worthy Dr. Watts tells us to "go learn of the ant to be prudent and -wise," but though it is with the most submissive humility that I venture -to contradict such an authority on natural history as the gifted author -of "How doth the little busy bee," yet I must confess that I do not -recognise in the ants the first of the virtues indicated. They -devastated a full box of chocolates in a single night, which surely was -hardly prudent, unless they possess iron constitutions. - -It was without doubt profitable for us to have constantly before us the -example of the clever and industrious ant, and we tried to profit -thereby, but at times we could not help feeling that the sluggard would -have been the more acceptable companion; the ant is so painfully -energetic, especially in the matter of absorbing food--the sluggard, I -feel sure, had more regard for his digestion. - -I never learned to distinguish the names of the innumerable crawling -creatures whom we met at table at meal times. Their sole characteristic -is greed, and they kept me continually reminded of the plagues of -Egypt, for they came in unlimited numbers, settling on the food, -darkening the air with their numberless forms, and devouring everything -eatable! They are eminently objectionable, and I defy the most devout -lover of natural history and "beasties" generally, to find any pleasure -in their society. - -One evening I was dining out, and towards the middle of dinner I -perceived a large, hideous object nestling among the profuse flower -decorations on the table. It didn't appear to me a very pleasant table -companion, but as no one else remarked it, and as I dislike appearing -disconcerted by the habits of strange countries, I said nothing about it -so long as the creature remained quiet. But when at last it came out -from its lair, and curling up its long tail made a run at me, I left the -table hurriedly. - -To my relief the other guests also displayed uneasiness, for the object -of my dislike was a scorpion, which had, it was supposed, been brought -into the room with the flowers, and had remained hidden from all eyes -but mine until its unwelcome disclosure of itself. There ensued an -exciting chase up and down the table after the animal, till it was at -length caught between two table spoons and drowned in a finger bowl. - -By little excitements of this kind the entertainments in Burmah are -often enlivened. Some doubt has been cast upon this story by sceptical -Europeans, but if any require proof, I can refer them to eminent members -of the I. C. S., (men whom none would dare to doubt), who will assure -them that such occurrences are frequent; in fact that the first place -one would look for a scorpion would be among the flowers upon a dinner -table! - -When watching the antics of a plump good tempered Jim Crow, as he -disports himself upon a pleasant English lawn, or when listening to his -peaceful "cawing" among the shady trees on a hot summer's day, one -little dreams that this same harmless, law-abiding creature, when -exposed to the degenerating influences of the east, becomes transformed -into the most disreputable vagabond upon the face of the earth. - -The impudent thefts by jackdaws have long been famed, but no words can -describe the unbounded presumption of the Burmese crows. - -They are always on the watch, and if food be left for an instant in a -room with open door or window, they enter, and settle on the table -without a moment's hesitation, helping themselves to anything that takes -their fancy, in the coolest manner imaginable. When the loogalays carry -the dishes of food from the kitchen to the house, these same impish -crows pounce down on them and bear away any tempting morsels, well -knowing that the men have their hands full, and cannot make reprisals. -They appear to know by instinct the approach of meal times, and settle -in crowds on the veranda rail or the window ledge, ready to carry off -the food directly one's back is turned, and in the meanwhile they pull -faces at us, and make rude remarks, for all the world like a collection -of vulgar little street boys. - -They know no fear; they only mock and mimic "shooings" and hand -clappings, and would laugh, I am sure, at the most awe-inspiring -scare-crow ever erected. They sometimes go so far as to deliberately -settle on the table and take a peck out of the cake, while one is -sitting there, and then before they can be caught, they give a cheeky -"caw," bow ironically, and flutter back to rejoin their admiring -comrades (who have doubtless dared them to the act) on the veranda. I do -not believe there exists any other creature in the world possessed of -such boundless cheek. - -They have a strong sense of humour of a practical-joking kind, and one -of their amusements in Remyo was to lure us away from the tea table by -feigned attacks upon our pots of hyacinth bulbs, which they uprooted in -the most devastating manner. We would fly out to the protection of our -precious bulbs, and return to find our cakes devoured or carried away, -by a reserve body of crows, who had been waiting in ambush behind the -door. - -They occasionally combine forces with other thieves. The most wearing -half hour I ever spent was one devoted to protecting the interest of the -cake and the cream jug, from the hostile attacks of half a dozen crows -and two kittens. While I lifted down the latter from the table the -former settled upon the cake, and when I turned my attentions to them, -the kittens returned to the charge. Mercifully, allies are not usually -forthcoming; only young, ignorant, and disobedient kittens would -associate with the disreputable crows; all properly brought up birds and -beasts avoid association with them. Even the vultures, who sat all day -on the trees shading the hospital, were contemptuous of those wicked -"gamin" the crows. - -Dogs abound in every Burmese village, and they and the pigs are the -chief scavengers of the place. Their number is legion, for it is -contrary to the Buddhist religion to take life, so all puppies are -allowed to live; and as it is further considered an act of merit to feed -them, they have a fairly pleasant existence. - -The pariah dog performs his scavenging duties conscientiously, but he -possesses few other merits to recommend him to one's esteem. He is at -best a stupid, noisy, thieving brute, whose "customs are nasty and whose -manners are none;" he occupies his time eating, sleeping, and fighting, -and his chief amusement is to snap at the heels of the European, and lie -across the road to upset the unwary bicyclist. Periodically, when the -pest becomes unbearable, a day of slaughter is appointed by the Majesty -of the Law, and all dogs who have no owner are poisoned. But in spite of -this rigorous measure, there never seems much diminution in the numbers. - -Our neighbour possessed three English dogs,--two terriers and a -greyhound. They had, no doubt, been well brought up, but had been led -astray by evil companions, and they joined in the campaign which the -rats, crows, and other creatures carried on against us. They delighted -to creep into our compound, trample on the flower beds, steal my cakes -(perhaps the household was not altogether sorry for that), and make away -with our tennis balls. One day, they drove a herd of ponies all over our -beloved garden, and then retired chuckling, to watch from a safe -distance, our desperate attempts to induce the bewildered creatures to -find the gate. - -The greyhound, I think, would have been a harmless creature, but the -terriers possessed a full share of the devilry of their breed, and urged -him to accompany them in all their audacious tricks. I believe it was -they who persuaded three goats (the chief destroyers of our kitchen -garden) to commence their raiding expeditions into our grounds, for the -goats always appeared from the neighbourhood of the dog's kennels, and -there was generally one terrier, at least, watching when Po Sin's -energetic chase of the goats over the radish beds began. - -Other animals there were in the neighbourhood of Remyo, dwellers in the -jungle, very different from the mischievous crew I have just described. -Tiger, bear, panther, cheetah, soft-eyed gyee, hares, jackals, and -others. Sometimes, as night drew near, I tried to picture how the -inhabitants of the jungle would be waking from sleep and preparing for -their busy night's work. - -The "Jungle Books" had of course inspired me with a great interest and -affection for all these animals, especially "Baloo" the bear, and -"Bagheera" the black panther, and I continued to love them so long as -they remained at a respectable distance, but when, at times, they made -expeditions into our neighbourhood, my admiration changed to awe. - -A tiger was the first visitor; he killed two ponies in the stable of a -neighbour. Then a black panther commenced to parade, nightly, the road -between our house and the club. He snapped up a little terrier which was -trotting along at its master's heels one evening; he was reported to -have been seen many times about dusk, slinking along by the road side, -and one man broke a record on his bicycle, followed by an innocent and -admiring pariah dog which he mistook for the panther. There is no doubt -that the panther really did for a time haunt the road, but he was so -useful as an excuse for the men to stay late at the club till they could -get a lift down in someone else's dog-cart (an excuse that appeared -quite convincing to their nervous wives) that he almost became an -institution. - -From the first I distinctly disliked jackals. My bedroom window opened -upon the back veranda, and one night I was awakened by a noise, and -looking out I saw two of these beasts (I did not know at the time what -they were) walking softly up and down devouring some food which the -loogalays had left there. - -For some time I watched them, fascinated by these shadowy dark forms -creeping about in the moonlight. Then, remembering that the back door -was unfastened, that I was most probably the first person they would -encounter should they enter, and that I had promised faithfully to -return to England in six months, I thought it time to rouse my -brother-in-law. - -Accordingly, I crept from my room, wakened him and my sister, and told -them to get up, to bring their guns, and follow me, as the back veranda -was full of wild animals, who might at any moment break into the house. -They were both singularly uninterested in my information (indeed my -brother only sleepily murmured "let them break" and went to sleep again) -but I insisted, and at last he rose in a very bad temper and came to -inquire into the cause of my alarm. - -Of course, the noise he made tumbling about and opening the door scared -our visitors, and when he went out, the veranda was empty. A few -scathing remarks about my powers of imagination were all the thanks I -received for thus saving the lives of the family. Ingratitude, thy name -is brother-in-law! - -After that my visitors came frequently, but I felt that I would rather -die than risk more sarcasm, and when I found they had no evil -intentions I grew rather to enjoy watching them. Their marvellous -quickness, their caution, and the silence of their movements seemed to -give a faint suggestion of what jungle life must be, though, of course, -the jackal compared with the nobler animals, is no more than "Jacala, -the belly that runs on four feet." - -After a while, our visitors were inspired to show their gratitude by -nightly serenades. Gratitude is always delightful to meet with in man or -beast, but I wished their's had taken some other form. A jackal's voice -is powerful but unpleasant, and has a mournful effect upon the nerves. - -Of dead beasts I saw many. The jungle round Remyo seemed to be a perfect -menagerie, and a noble panther, tiger or bear was often borne in triumph -into the station and deposited in the centre of the Club compound, to be -admired of all beholders. - -When no time could be spared for an organised shoot, a reward would be -offered for the carcase of any panther or cheetah which might have been -annoying a neighbouring jungle village, and the animal, when killed, was -always brought in to be shown to my brother by the claimants of the -reward. It was a little startling at first to have bears, panthers, -etc., casually brought and deposited at one's front door, but we grew -accustomed to it after a while, as one grows accustomed to all things -but hanging. On one occasion some natives brought in the body of a huge -leopard which had killed and eaten a man near their village (a most -unusual proceeding for a leopard), and a terrible looking animal it was, -with huge claws and teeth, and a sneaking deceitful face. The whole -incident was disagreeably gruesome. - -On another occasion we were presented with two live bear cubs, whose -parents had been killed. They were dear little fluffy brown creatures, -and we longed to keep them, but they generally become a great nuisance -when older, as they are always treacherous, and capable any day of -trotting into the village and killing half a dozen people as a morning's -amusement. - -I was strangely lucky (or unlucky, I hardly know which to call it) in -the matter of snakes, for I did not see a single live snake during my -visit. I constantly expected to meet one in the compound or jungle, but -I never even found one coming up the water-hole in the bath-room, or -coiled up in my bed. The creatures never came near me, even though I -spread out the skin of a huge rock snake in the compound, in the hopes -that its relations (as is invariably the custom with snakes in books) -might be induced to assemble. - -The most wise looking creatures (always excepting the elephants) which I -saw were the Burmese bullocks. Their grave, thoughtful, placid faces -reminded me of the images of Gaudama. As they crawl along their way -drawing the creaking bullock carts to the bazaar, or trot merrily -through the jungle, taking gaily-attired Burmans to attend a Pwé, they -have ever the same patient, quiet, abstracted expression, as though -this menial work is to them a mere appendage to the deeper life of -meditation. This is what their expression conveys to me; some think it -denotes stupidity. - -The cattle belonging to the Burmese appear to be most independent -animals. Each morning they wander away into the jungle at their own -sweet wills, returning at night of their own accord for the milking. We -were much astonished one day, when, in answer to our request that the -milk might be brought earlier in future, the milkman replied with much -"shekkohing" and humility that it could not be, as the cow did not wish -to return earlier from her walk. The Burmans are very casual in their -treatment and care of the cattle, numbers of which fall victims to -tigers and other rapacious beasts. - -This chapter would not be complete without a word or two about the -Burmese ponies; but who am I, who never could make head or tail of any -pony's propensities, to presume to describe their character? Very small -and wiry are they, very devoted to polo (which they understand quite as -well as their masters, and which they play with the same keenness); -conceited and obstinate; but obedient and affectionate to their masters, -and possessing as great a love of a joke as a Burman himself. - -One of our ponies, "Pearl," a lovely little animal, and a splendid polo -player, possessed all these characteristics. With her master or mistress -she was as gentle and submissive as anyone could desire, but she assumed -the most unpardonable airs towards all the rest of the world. She -received caresses and attentions with a haughty disdain, turned up her -nose at any but the very best food, and led her poor sais a most trying -time. I admired her from afar, but we never became intimate; she -evidently despised me, and had the most disagreeable knack of making me -feel ignorant and small. She was too much of a lady to show her dislike -by kicks or snaps, and treated an enemy with scornful indifference until -he attempted to ride her, when (to use a modern colloquialism) she soon -managed to get a bit of her own back. - -"Stunsail", another of our ponies, was a good old soul, of worthy -character but worthless value. He had missed his vocation in life, for -he ought most certainly to have been a circus pony. He was full of -tricks, not frolicsome or spontaneous ones, but tricks carefully -acquired by long hours of practice, such as bowing to ladies, salaaming -for bananas, and lying down, pretending to be dead. It was nice of him -to have taken the trouble to acquire these accomplishments, but his -fondness for displaying them at all times was often very disturbing to -his rider. - -Our third pony "John" we always thought a quiet, easy-going individual, -until we lent him to a lady who was paying a short visit to Remyo. She -was not an accomplished horse-woman, but would not for the world have -confessed to the fact, for she liked to pose as quite fearless, and -devoted to riding. - -"John's" strong sense of humour first became apparent in his treatment -of her. He soon gauged the extent of the lady's equestrian powers, and -enjoyed himself immensely. He did not unseat her or bolt with her: his -humour was of a much finer quality; he merely consistently refused to do -anything she wished. When she intended a short ride, "John" would keep -her out for hours; when she was prepared for an afternoon's expedition, -"John" would bring her home after a half-mile canter. If she announced -her wish to visit her friends at the far side of the station, "John" -would take her for a gallop through the jungle; when she donned her -oldest habit to go a quiet country ride "John" would insist upon her -calling upon her smartest neighbours, and would walk up to the front -door and stand there until she was obliged to dismount and enter. - -There was no limit to the mischievous devilry of that pony. When poor -Mrs. F. rode out with the rest of the station, her troubles were even -greater. When her companions suggested a gallop, "John" wilfully -assumed his slowest walk; and when everyone was riding slowly and -conversing pleasantly together, the poor lady would suddenly, without -any apparent reason, break off in the middle of a sentence, and set off -at the wildest gallop through the jungle, or turn round and ride -furiously for home. Nothing would induce her to confess that she could -not manage her pony, so she was obliged to invent the wildest excuses -and explanations for her conduct. Others thought it was her -eccentricity, but we knew it was "John." - - - - -CHAPTER XI. - -SPORT. - - -In Burmah the Tiger story takes the place occupied by the fish story in -this country, and is stamped, I suspect, with the same unblushing -characteristics. Judging from the tiger stories I heard, I could come to -no other conclusion than that the Anglo-Indian is possessed of amazing -nerve and ingenuity (qualities useful to him alike in the exploit and in -the telling of it), and I heard him with ever increasing interest and -wonder. The tiger is the favourite theme, though he is but of small -account whose chronicle does not also embrace some experiences in the -pursuit of the elephant, the bear and other fearful wildfowl indigenous -to the country. - -Most men own to being a little chary about elephant hunting I found, -but our friend the Policeman appeared to have shot them like snipe. At -first I was rather inclined to make light of elephant shooting, they are -such exceedingly large animals that I thought even I could hardly fail -to bag one if I got him broadside on; but the Policeman set me right on -that point. - -From his explanation, I gathered that the elephant is invulnerable save -only in one vital part, a spot behind the ear, and the sportsman -(according to my narrator) must be as dead on that spot as "Homocea." - -My informant also told me terrible stories of how the elephant will turn -on his pursuer and trample on him, or tear him in pieces with his tusks, -and he gave me further such blood-curdling descriptions of the -terrifying noise made by an approaching herd of elephants crashing -through the jungle, and trumpeting in their rage, that I felt devoutly -thankful that I was visiting this particular district. The wild -elephants of the neighbouring jungle, in their almost human -intelligence, recognised the danger to themselves of conduct other than -the most retiring and unprovocative character in a locality where the -peace was preserved by such an ever threatening Nemesis as our -Policeman. - -Bears, too, our Policeman had frequently hunted, and many a hair-breadth -escape had he effected by running up hill (bears cannot run up hill, you -know), or swinging from tree to tree and performing other acrobatic -feats which the bear was too heavy to attempt with success. - -On one occasion, he said he had been overtaken by the bear, and his left -arm chawed in fourteen places (I forget why the bear couldn't be content -with one spot and how he protected himself from the animal's further -attentions); but he didn't mind the bear so much as the well meant -efforts of his companion, who, the hero of the episode complained, stood -afar off and poured in a devastating fire, directed in a distracted and -indiscriminate manner at him and the bear alike. Many and varied indeed -were the dangers through which this seemingly fearless hunter had passed -unscathed. - -Several tigers visited the neighbourhood during my visit, and caused -great excitement among the men at the Club, who thought nothing of -sitting up all night in an uncomfortable tree, over an unsightly "kill," -in hope of compassing the animal's undoing. - -Often, alas! they were doomed to disappointment. On one occasion when my -brother and a friend were awaiting a tiger's approach, a mist gathered -round them, effectually obscuring everything from their sight. So there -they were, obliged, perforce, to sit in darkness, not daring to descend, -and of course unable to see, and cheered by listening to the tiger -comfortably devouring its prey, within a few yards of their ambush. The -Engineer, when he heard this story was for patenting an electric flash -light, which could be turned on to light the Sportsman when the tiger -was comfortably settled down to his meal, but this original suggestion -was ungratefully rejected, much to his disappointment. - -But one afternoon the Thugyi brought in word that a large tiger had been -marked down in the neighbouring jungle, and a beat was arranged for the -following day. Then it was that the Policeman earned our undying -gratitude by proposing that we ladies, who had been behaving of late in -an exemplary manner, should, for once, be allowed to accompany the -Sportsmen, to see the great sight of our lives, a tiger shoot. - -I doubt whether the suggestion met with the entire approbation of the -other males, but as the Policeman was organising the beat, and as we all -promised to be very good and obedient, they agreed reluctantly to take -us. Women, perhaps naturally, are considered very much "de trop" on -these occasions. A tiger shoot is a serious, sometimes a dangerous -business, and female frivolities and nerves would decidedly be -embarrassments. - -I heard a story of a girl, reputed to be a great Sportswoman and a good -shot, who accompanied her male friends upon one of these expeditions. -Platforms had been built for the Sportsmen in the trees in the line of -the beat, and she shared one with a man who was more accustomed to -shooting and hunting than to the society of the other sex, whom he held -in much greater awe than any wild animal, however dangerous. When the -tiger made its appearance, the girl promptly fainted, and her poor -companion spent a most unhappy ten minutes between the unconscious girl -and the enraged tiger, being far more alarmed at the former. - -However, to return to my story, when we had given assurances that we -never fainted, nor had hysterics, nor grew tired; and had promised -faithfully not to move a muscle, not to speak a single word, not to -disobey an order, and above all not to want to shoot, the men folk -graciously allowed us to accompany them; but it was not to create a -precedent. - -How excited we were and how nervous! A seat in a tree did not appear to -me to offer much security against the tiger's attack, however high it -might be. Tigers, I had always been told, are near relations to cats, -and I knew cats climb trees. When I nervously breathed these doubts to -the Policeman, he solemnly assured me that tigers will not climb, and by -standing on their hind legs can only reach up about fourteen feet; but -this did not convince me, for had I not seen in my nursery days (and -early impressions are lasting ones) brilliantly coloured pictures of -tiger shoots wherein the tiger was invariably depicted, leaping into the -air, or climbing fiercely up the side of an elephant, while the nervous -occupant of the howdah peered cautiously over the edge? Was I to ignore -the lessons of my youth? I can only explain this inconsistency by -suggesting that tigers may have changed their habits with the advance of -civilization. - -Nothing was talked of that evening but tigers and tiger shooting. The -Policeman and other local sportsmen were in great request, and their -stories were listened to with an interest and belief which I should -think quite astonished them. Even to the village did the excitement -spread, for the love of sport is as prevalent among the Burmans as among -Englishmen; and the natives are well paid for serving as beaters. - -Early in the morning the hunting party assembled in our compound, and, -after partaking of a cheery "chota hazri," we set out, a merry cavalcade -consisting of seven men, and three women, and accompanied by a -miscellaneous collection of servants and native "shikarries." - -It was one of those fresh, cool, delicious mornings that make one feel -inclined to sing with Pippa: - - - "The morning's at seven, The hillside's dew pearled." - "God's in His Heaven, all's well with the World." - - -In spite of qualms regarding the ordeal before us, we enjoyed that early -ride, and were a very happy, hungry crew when we arrived at the jungle -village whither breakfast had already been despatched. We found -everything ready, prepared by the Club Khansamah, and his staff of -silent, well-trained loogalays, and we breakfasted in the "hpoongyi -kyaung" itself, surrounded by images of Gaudama, by sacred pictures and -bells; shaded by lovely groups of bamboos, and watched from afar by an -interested crowd of young Burmans, whose shaven heads and yellow robes -showed them to be the hpoongyi's pupils. - -[Illustration: A HPOONGYI KYAUNG MONASTERY] - -But we were not allowed to linger too long in idleness, discussing the -merits of "the chicken and ham, the muffin and toast, and the strawberry -jam," to say nothing of luscious pineapples, incomparable bananas -(differing as much from the banana we meet in England, as chalk from -cheese), the much vaunted mangostines, the objectionable (from my way of -thinking) custard apple, and the hundred, other delicacies which our -generous hosts had provided for our delectation. I had scarcely -exchanged three words with the pineapples, and had only a bowing -acquaintance with the plum cake, when the doughty Policeman gave the -word to start. - -It was really extraordinary how the presence of danger and -responsibility affected the bearing of our Policeman. The change came on -quite suddenly, in the middle of breakfast, and was maintained till -evening. He was transformed from a jovial, talkative personage, to one -sombre and morose, refusing to utter a word more than was absolutely -necessary, greeting all observations with a discouraging frown or a -shake of the head, and, in all his movements and actions displaying the -impressive characteristics of "Hawkeye," and other Indian Hunter friends -of one's youth. We ladies were immensely impressed, and did our best to -imitate his severe expression and noiseless, stalking gait, as closely -as possible. Perhaps we presented rather a weird appearance, stealing -along with harassed, stern set faces, and cautious steps, like stage -pirates, but concluding that it was the proper rôle to adopt on such an -occasion we adopted it. - -Outside the kyaung we met the beaters; a picturesque group in their -bright coloured dresses, armed with sticks, cans, whistles, and -everything sufficiently noisy to rouse "Shere Khan" from his noonday -sleep. These beaters were despatched, under the direction of a native -"shikarrie," to commence their work about half-a-mile to the westward, -while we went to take up our position to the east of the rumoured -position of the tiger. - -By this time the sun was up, and it was becoming very hot. For about -half an hour we stole along in single file through the jungle. Half the -men went before us to part the tangled bushes, the remainder brought up -the rear, lest one of us should be lost; a possible and very unpleasant -prospect in jungle so thick that it is impossible to see a yard around. -We were very silent, partly from excitement, partly because silence was -advisable; for who could tell what sleeping inhabitant of the jungle we -might pass within a few yards. - -At last our leader judged that we had penetrated far enough; he halted -the party, and assigned to each gun its position. We ladies were each -confided to the care of a good shot, and repaired with our respective -protectors to the trees appointed for us by our leader. After some -original research into the difficulties of tree climbing (especially -tree climbing when the tree has no branches within five or six feet of -the ground), and the unpleasant sensation of missing one's footing and -slithering down the trunk,--I at length, with the aid of much pulling, -pushing, and other forcible assistance from my companion, attained my -perch, and my protector climbed to a position in a tree close to mine. -We had no platform to sit upon, but perched on the most convenient -branches available. A branch of a tree is not the most comfortable seat -in the world, and before the day was over I had ceased to envy "the -birds of the air, who make their habitations among the branches." - -After all the sportsmen were settled in their relative positions, about -a hundred yards apart, a weary time of waiting ensued. No one spoke. -Everywhere around us were the mysterious humming, rustling sounds of the -jungle, and far away to the westward we heard the faint noise of -shouting and belaboured "tom-toms," which told us that the beaters had -commenced their work. The strain of excitement was terrible. - -I measured the distance between my feet and the ground, and calculated -that, my tree not being very high, the tiger would experience little -difficulty in reaching me. I mechanically drew up my feet, and tightened -my hold on my sun umbrella; I remembered my board ship companions had -assured me that poking an animal in the eye is very effective, but I -didn't feel much confidence in this advice. Nor did I feel much -confidence in my oft-tried, and much vaunted presence of mind; absence -of body would have comforted me more. I peered up among the branches, -and decided where I would place my feet if a sudden flight to higher -regions should be necessary. Then I came to the conclusion that I didn't -like tiger shooting at all. - -I glanced at my protector; he looked cool and alert. He was one of those -men who appear absolutely uninterested in all that is going on until the -supreme moment arrives, when they wake up suddenly and distinguish -themselves, after which they relapse again into their former -indifference. I regained my courage at sight of his coolness, and -listened. - -Intense stillness around and behind us; even the jungle had ceased to -whisper. Everything seemed waiting in eager expectancy. But, before us, -drawing ever nearer and nearer, were the beaters, rattling sticks and -cans, whistling, shouting, and playing on "tom-toms," while between them -and us, aroused from its heavy sleep, slinking away from the noise and -disturbance was----what? The possibilities of a jungle drive are -endless. Suddenly the high grass beneath my tree parted, "Now for it," I -think. But no! it is only a gyee, hurrying away with scared eyes from -the unknown danger behind. It may escape to-day; its enemy, man, is -after bigger game. - -Ever nearer drew the beaters. "Will it never end?" I whisper. But what -was that? A loud report close to my ear; something flashes past in the -grass below, there is a loud roar of pain and fury, and then "all is -over except the shouting." - -For a few moments we waited in astonishment that it is all over so -quickly, and in doubt if the animal be really dead. Then everyone -tumbled simultaneously from their perches and hurried to the spot. - -There lay the tiger, quite dead, but looking so lifelike that while I -put my hand in his mouth or felt his cruel claws, I was conscious of a -half fear lest he should be only shamming, and should come to life again -with a sudden spring. The beautiful skin was uninjured, save where the -bullet had entered the spine, and as we looked at him, the very emblem -of strength and beauty lying there, slain without even a fight for life, -I think we all felt a little pity. - -But pity soon gave way to triumph. The beaters arrived and crowded round -the tiger, laughing and chattering; mocking the animal which had held -them in such terror while he lived, and trying to steal his whiskers, -which the Burmans value as charms. - -But we soon found we were hot, thirsty, and tired, so we set out on our -return journey to Remyo, the beaters carrying our victim in triumph -fastened on a long bamboo. News of our success had preceded us, and as -we approached the village we were met by an immense crowd of admiring -natives, in that condition of giggling and jabbering excitement to which -only a crowd composed largely of Madrassees can attain. So persistent -were the attacks made upon the tiger's whiskers, that it became -necessary at last to tie his head up in a bag, and in that undignified -condition he was borne home and deposited safely in the club compound, -where during the day, he was visited and admired by every inhabitant of -the station. - -Thus ended my first and only tiger shoot. How I wish I could electrify -my readers with descriptions of expeditions wherein I myself would -appear as the heroine, shooting tigers, and performing other moving -exploits by flood and field. But it may not be. The eager search after -truth which has been so noticeable lately among the British public, -restrains such interesting flights of fancy, and in these days, -romancers who would display their quality to an appreciative audience, -must address themselves to the Marines, or to the British Association. - -There is endless variety of game in the neighbourhood of Remyo. Snipe -are almost as common as sparrows at home; partridges, peacocks, jungle -fowl, gyee, and hares all abound, and many an enjoyable shooting -expedition is undertaken, sometimes with, sometimes without the excuse -of "business" in the district. - -Well provided with ammunition, food, drink, rugs, and bedding, the -Anglo-Indian sets out for two or three days sport, wandering from place -to place, sleeping in the open sided "zayats," near the hpoongyi -kyaungs, and spending the day in the jungle, in eager search after the -Englishman's great desire "something to kill." - -Some of the native "shikarries" who accompany these expeditions are -splendid men. They are very silent, very uninterested in, even -contemptuous of, things not connected with sport, but devoted to their -profession, and as keenly excited, as delighted at success, or -disappointed at failure, as any good sportsman all the world over; and -possessing moreover a knowledge of the habits and customs of the jungle -folk scarcely surpassed by "Mowgli" himself. - -A form of sport much indulged in by the Shan chiefs in the past, but -which has been strenuously discouraged was "Collecting Heads." The last -exponent of the game dwelt in the hills on the Shan State border, and -was the hereditary leader of a large tribe of men as fierce and savage -as himself. He was an ancient chief, proud of his race, his power, and -position; proud too of his home, and above all proud of his wonderful -bodily strength. Many and marvellous are the stories told of his -extraordinary doings. On one occasion, unarmed, he fought and killed a -tiger, clinging to its throat until he throttled it. He bore the marks -of the contest, huge scars upon his head, and throat, and chest, until -his dying day. - -It was his custom (as doubtless it had been the custom of his ancestors, -and of many of their neighbours) to descend periodically from his -mountain heights alone and spend a few weeks in the neighbouring -plains, engaged in his favourite hobby of collecting heads. He was not -particular what heads he collected, but he preferred human ones when he -could get them. He would remain in the plains for a while, way-laying, -hunting, and slaying as many of his fellow creatures as he could meet -with (occasionally perhaps varying the sport by killing a tiger) and at -last when he grew for the nonce weary of this amusement, he would return -in triumph to his tribe, and display to their admiring gaze his ghastly -spoils. - -The placid native suffered his hostile inroads with that fatalism with -which they regard all misfortune. But one day the Chief made a slight -mistake by adding to his collection the head of an Englishman (who was -no doubt poaching in the Chief's country) and for this departure from -the accepted rules of the game, he paid penalty. - -A detachment of soldiers was despatched, who soon scattered the tribe -and captured the offender. I met the subaltern who had been in charge of -the escort, which brought him down to the plains, and he described to -me the desperate efforts the fierce old man made to escape. He was bound -hand and foot, watched night and day by four men, and his bonds were -inspected every hour; on one of these inspections it was discovered that -the ropes were frayed and gnawed half away. But his efforts were of no -avail; though he had the strength of a giant he could do nothing against -such overpowering odds. - -When at length they reached the plains, he turned to have a last look at -the vanishing shadows of the hills, which no doubt he had loved with -that silent, passionate love felt for their home by the inhabitants of -all mountainous countries, and after a final desperate effort to kill -himself, he suddenly seemed to relinquish all hope, and resigned himself -stolidly to his fate. - -His defiance and strength seemed to pass away with that last sight of -his beloved hills, and a broken-spirited, weak, helpless, old man was -all that remained. They brought him to Rangoon and banished his old, -worn-out body to the Andaman Islands, but his proud, fierce spirit fled -back with that last look at the hills, and haunts the wild regions where -he loved to roam. - -[Illustration: Decoration] - - - - -CHAPTER XII. - -THE RETURN. - - "But that's all shove be'ind me--long ago and far away - An' there ain't no busses runnin' from the Bank to Mandalay." - - "For the temple-bells are callin', and it's there that I would be - By the old Moulmein Pagoda, looking lazy at the sea." - (Kipling.) - - -To the stranger in this fascinating country, days are as minutes, months -as days, and it seemed that scarcely had I arrived and commenced to look -around me, when my visit came to an end, and sadly bidding farewell to -Remyo and its many delights, all too soon I had to return home. - -Alas! too, I found I was compelled to renew my acquaintance with the -Burmese pony, the only alternative being a bullock cart; and let those -who have ridden forty miles along an up-country road in a Burmese -bullock cart----but no! I do not like to think such an experience can -have befallen my worst enemy. - -Once more, therefore, I mounted to the saddle, and rode, or more -properly speaking bumped, twenty miles the first day. At the end of that -distance I had no desire to proceed further, nor, I am sure, had the -pony. Accordingly, we stopped at the now familiar dâk bungalow, and -stabled ourselves and our ponies for the night. I do not know what were -my pony's feelings that night as he thought over the events of the day, -but they cannot have been pleasant. He was a strong-minded pony -(possibly he had some sympathy for his rider) and having come to the -conclusion that a repetition on the morrow of the past day's proceedings -would be unpleasant and unwise, during the night he slipped his halter -and gently trotted back to Remyo, accompanied by my brother's and the -orderly's mounts. - -When we arose in the morning, all we found in the little hut at the -bottom of the bungalow compound were three belated looking saddles and -some broken bridle reins, and the only course open to us was to continue -our journey on foot. - -Some people, I believe, pretend to see humour in such situations, but -we were not amused. The heat was awful, the road almost knee deep in -dust, and as we plodded along for several miles, losing our way in short -cuts, scrambling down precipitous ravines and dry water courses, and -exchanging no single word, but keeping all our breath for the exertion -of clambering out again, I became, by comparison, almost reconciled to -the previous day's experiences. - -When at last we reached the foot of the hills, and found a "gharry" -waiting to convey us to Mandalay, we resembled pillars of dust, and were -as thirsty as the desert. I was so tired that I forgot to be sentimental -over the last glimpse of the hills; and as we approached Mandalay, -beautiful in her bower of green, with the sun shining as ever on the -"dreaming spires," the white pagodas, and the golden domes, my one and -only desire was "Drink." - -I had delayed my departure from Remyo as late as possible in the hopes -of witnessing a "hpoongyi burning," one of the most characteristic -Burmese festivals. The holy man had died some time previously, and in -order to do his memory due honour, his body had been preserved many -months, and the burning, with the many strange rites and festivities -which invariably accompany such ceremonies, was announced to take place -the week before my departure. But from some unknown cause (perhaps they -discovered he had been more virtuous than they at first imagined) the -authorities suddenly decided to preserve the body until a more imposing -pageant could be prepared, so I missed the sight; and having delayed my -departure, I had time only to spend a few hours in Mandalay and Rangoon -before embarking on the homeward bound steamer. - -It was very sad, that departure from Rangoon, where so many friends were -left behind, as the last beauties of this bewitching country faded -slowly from sight. The glaring noonday sunshine shed no illusory haze -over the scene. The muddy brown water of the river and the ugly shores -lined with factories and mills, seemed a foretaste of the matter-of-fact -land to which we were returning; but behind rose the distant palm trees, -and the golden dome; and the soft music of the tinkling bells of the -pagoda, bidding us a last farewell, was wafted to us by the perfume -laden eastern breeze. - -My homeward voyage was without any extraordinary incident, and in due -course I arrived at Marseilles. This well-known port requires no -description, but I must say a few words in its favour; it is so -universally disparaged. - -The noisy, unsavoury Marseilles of the docks and harbour is very -different from Marseilles viewed from that magnificent church, "Notre -Dame de la garde." When we climb to the summit of the rock whereon -stands the stately white church, surmounted by the huge golden image of -the Virgin, keeping watch over the ships that enter the harbour, and -shining as a beacon miles out to welcome sight to the longing eyes of -the home coming sailor; when we look down from our height over the -pretty little red and white houses, the graceful spires, and the -clusters of dark green foliage nestling in the shelter of the high white -cliffs which enclose the harbour; and again beyond the town, beyond the -rugged brown rocks, and the placid deep blue water, to the ancient -"Chateau D'If," dark and forbidding in the midst of the sunny landscape, -we acknowledge that nature in the bestowal of her beauties has not, -after all, confined her gifts to the dreaming East. - -I think the true reason why Marseilles is so frequently spoken of with -disfavour is on account of the "Bouillabaisse," the terrible mixture -which delights the palates of the natives, and which innocent strangers -are induced to partake of under the delusion that it must therefore be -good for human food. - -The only recommendation this dish possesses is the curious interest it -arouses in one's mind as to what it is really composed of. One never -knows what form of fish, flesh, or _bad_ red herring one may encounter -next. The appearance of the dish resembles one's childish imaginations -of a "Mess of Pottage." Its scent suggests Marseilles harbour, and the -stoke hole of a Channel steamer. I myself was never sufficiently -enterprising to taste it, but judging by the expression of haggard -thought that overspread the features of some who were so venturesome, I -should say the taste must be "mystic, wonderful," and that years of -careful study are necessary to attain to a true appreciation of its -subtle delicacy. - -I think the journey from Marseilles to London is the most wearisome that -can be undertaken. After the warmth, the quiet, and the absence of hurry -to which I had become accustomed in the East, I found the bustle and -noise, added to the piercing cold of a European April, almost -overpowering. I shivered on deck, as our steamer ploughed her way across -the Channel, through a damp clinging fog, and when at last the welcome -white cliffs came into sight, I was far too miserable to wax sentimental -over this return to my native shore, and I longed only for tea and a -fire. - -Yet after all, despite the contrast betwixt sunshine and yellow fog, -between jungle glades and London streets, despite all the advantages -which we know that every other clime and country can boast over our own, -England is England still, and Home is Home. - -And now let me offer a word of advice to those who, like myself, -undertake adventurous wanderings far from their native land, and recount -the same with many embellishments. On their return home, let them beware -of introducing to the admiring circle of their friends, any who may have -accompanied them on their travels. - -I had been back at home some three months, had told my story, and had -established my reputation, when one day a visitor from Burmah arrived. - -He had not been long in the house before some uncalled-for allusion was -made to the historic occasion on which I defended my sister's house in -Remyo from a body of dacoits. He denied all knowledge of the incident. -Suspicions awoke in the breasts of my friends. They questioned the -visitor about my struggle with the tiger, my adventure with the bear, my -heroic bravery on the occasion of the shipwreck, and about all my other -best inspired narrations. - -Alas! he denied them all, and my credit was gone for ever. I fancy some -have even ceased to believe that I have been to Burmah at all, and some -have become so suspicious as to make enquiries as to whether I really am -myself. It is hard! and the recently notorious contributor to the "Wide -Wide World" Magazine has my deep sympathy. Would I had lived in the days -of Columbus; I would have discovered more than America, had I enjoyed -such excellent opportunities as did he. - - * * * * * - -Thus ends the account of my experiences in Burmah, and of the impression -left on my mind by this oft-described country. - -Perhaps distance lends enchantment to the view, and makes me forget the -evils of the climate, the dangers and discomforts of life there, the -slowness of locomotion, the lack of many so-called benefits of -civilisation; and I seem to remember only a land where the sun is always -shining and the world is always gay; where the air is heavy with -delicious eastern scents, and filled with the harmonious music of the -temple bells, as they are gently swayed by the whispering breeze. A land -where the hues of earth can vie with the brilliancy of the sunset, and -the eye is feasted with delicately blended colours. - -Here Beauty and Peace hold eternal honeymoon. Misery seems to have no -place in this land of delight, but contentment ever reigns, and the -happy Burman dreams away his life in a paradise of sunshine. No one who -has visited this country can ever forget it, but learns to understand -too well that fascination so well expressed by Mr. Kipling: "If you've -'eard the East a' callin', you won't never 'eed nought else." - -I remember Burmah, too, as a land of picturesque buildings, of rich -jewels, exquisite costumes, and beautiful graceful women. A land of -kindly hearts, friendly welcomes, and ungrudging hospitality. - -These are remembered when the last glint of the golden-domed pagoda has -faded into the shadowy distance, and we sail away from the peaceful -sunshine and the palm trees, westward ho! to this hurrying, bustling -modern world, where, though beauty exists, we have no time to appreciate -it, and where, like King Midas of old, we would turn all we touch to -glittering gold, and for ever destroy its charm. - - -R. PLATT, PRINTER, WIGAN. - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of An English Girl's First Impressions of -Burmah, by Beth Ellis - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK AN ENGLISH GIRL'S FIRST *** - -***** This file should be named 40001-8.txt or 40001-8.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/4/0/0/0/40001/ - -Produced by sp1nd, Martin Pettit and the Online Distributed -Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was -produced from images generously made available by The -Internet Archive) - - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions -will be renamed. - -Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no -one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation -(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without -permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, -set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to -copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to -protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. Project -Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you -charge for the eBooks, unless you receive specific permission. If you -do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the -rules is very easy. You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose -such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and -research. They may be modified and printed and given away--you may do -practically ANYTHING with public domain eBooks. Redistribution is -subject to the trademark license, especially commercial -redistribution. - - - -*** START: FULL LICENSE *** - -THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE -PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK - -To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free -distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work -(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project -Gutenberg-tm License (available with this file or online at -http://gutenberg.org/license). - - -Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works - -1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to -and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property -(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all -the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy -all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your possession. -If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the -terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or -entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8. - -1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be -used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who -agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few -things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See -paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement -and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm electronic -works. See paragraph 1.E below. - -1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the Foundation" -or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual works in the -collection are in the public domain in the United States. If an -individual work is in the public domain in the United States and you are -located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from -copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative -works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg -are removed. Of course, we hope that you will support the Project -Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting free access to electronic works by -freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm works in compliance with the terms of -this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with -the work. You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by -keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project -Gutenberg-tm License when you share it without charge with others. - -1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern -what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are in -a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, check -the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement -before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or -creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project -Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no representations concerning -the copyright status of any work in any country outside the United -States. - -1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: - -1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate -access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear prominently -whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work on which the -phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the phrase "Project -Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed, -copied or distributed: - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with -almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or -re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included -with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org/license - -1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is derived -from the public domain (does not contain a notice indicating that it is -posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied -and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees -or charges. If you are redistributing or providing access to a work -with the phrase "Project Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the -work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 -through 1.E.7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the -Project Gutenberg-tm trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or -1.E.9. - -1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted -with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution -must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any additional -terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms will be linked -to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works posted with the -permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work. - -1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this -work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm. - -1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this -electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without -prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with -active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project -Gutenberg-tm License. - -1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, -compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any -word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access to or -distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format other than -"Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official version -posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site (www.gutenberg.org), -you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a -copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon -request, of the work in its original "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other -form. Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. - -1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, -performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works -unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing -access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works provided -that - -- You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from - the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method - you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is - owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he - has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the - Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments - must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you - prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax - returns. Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and - sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the - address specified in Section 4, "Information about donations to - the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation." - -- You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies - you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he - does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm - License. You must require such a user to return or - destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium - and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of - Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -- You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of any - money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the - electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days - of receipt of the work. - -- You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free - distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set -forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from -both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and Michael -Hart, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark. Contact the -Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. - -1.F. - -1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable -effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread -public domain works in creating the Project Gutenberg-tm -collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm electronic -works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain -"Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or -corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual -property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a -computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by -your equipment. - -1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right -of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project -Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all -liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal -fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT -LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE -PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE -TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE -LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR -INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH -DAMAGE. - -1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a -defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can -receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a -written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you -received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with -your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you with -the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a -refund. If you received the work electronically, the person or entity -providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to -receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If the second copy -is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further -opportunities to fix the problem. - -1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth -in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS' WITH NO OTHER -WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO -WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTIBILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. - -1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied -warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of damages. -If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement violates the -law of the state applicable to this agreement, the agreement shall be -interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or limitation permitted by -the applicable state law. The invalidity or unenforceability of any -provision of this agreement shall not void the remaining provisions. - -1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the -trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone -providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in accordance -with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the production, -promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works, -harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, including legal fees, -that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following which you do -or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this or any Project Gutenberg-tm -work, (b) alteration, modification, or additions or deletions to any -Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any Defect you cause. - - -Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm - -Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of -electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of computers -including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It exists -because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations from -people in all walks of life. - -Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the -assistance they need, are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's -goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will -remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure -and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future generations. -To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation -and how your efforts and donations can help, see Sections 3 and 4 -and the Foundation web page at http://www.pglaf.org. - - -Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive -Foundation - -The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit -501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the -state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal -Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification -number is 64-6221541. Its 501(c)(3) letter is posted at -http://pglaf.org/fundraising. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent -permitted by U.S. federal laws and your state's laws. - -The Foundation's principal office is located at 4557 Melan Dr. S. -Fairbanks, AK, 99712., but its volunteers and employees are scattered -throughout numerous locations. Its business office is located at -809 North 1500 West, Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887, email -business@pglaf.org. Email contact links and up to date contact -information can be found at the Foundation's web site and official -page at http://pglaf.org - -For additional contact information: - Dr. Gregory B. Newby - Chief Executive and Director - gbnewby@pglaf.org - - -Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation - -Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide -spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of -increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be -freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest -array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations -($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt -status with the IRS. - -The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating -charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United -States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a -considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up -with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations -where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To -SEND DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any -particular state visit http://pglaf.org - -While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we -have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition -against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who -approach us with offers to donate. - -International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make -any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from -outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. - -Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation -methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other -ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. -To donate, please visit: http://pglaf.org/donate - - -Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic -works. - -Professor Michael S. Hart is the originator of the Project Gutenberg-tm -concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared -with anyone. For thirty years, he produced and distributed Project -Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support. - - -Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed -editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the U.S. -unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not necessarily -keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition. - - -Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search facility: - - http://www.gutenberg.org - -This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, -including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to -subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. |