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diff --git a/40008.txt b/40008.txt deleted file mode 100644 index 26773d5..0000000 --- a/40008.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,3149 +0,0 @@ -Project Gutenberg's The Autobiography of a Cornish Smuggler, by Harry Carter - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with -almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or -re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included -with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org - - -Title: The Autobiography of a Cornish Smuggler - -Author: Harry Carter - -Editor: John B. Cornish - -Release Date: June 16, 2012 [EBook #40008] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ASCII - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CORNISH SMUGGLER *** - - - - -Produced by Chris Curnow, Paul Clark and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive) - - - - - - Transcriber's Note: - - Every effort has been made to replicate this text as faithfully as - possible. The Cornish dialect written by Captain Carter includes - inconsistencies in spelling and capitalisation. Some changes have - been made. They are listed at the end of the text. - - Blank spaces, representing missing words in the original MS., have - been replaced by "[...]". - - Italic text has been marked with _underscores_. - - Text marked ^{thus} was superscripted. - - - - -[Illustration] - - - - -A CORNISH SMUGGLER - - -[Illustration: LANDING THE CARGO. - -_F. BRANGWYN._] - - - - - THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY - OF - A CORNISH SMUGGLER - - - (CAPTAIN HARRY CARTER, OF PRUSSIA COVE) - - 1749-1809 - - _WITH AN INTRODUCTION AND NOTES_ - - BY - JOHN B. CORNISH - - SECOND EDITION. - - London: - GIBBINGS & CO., LTD., 18 BURY STREET, W.C. - J. POLLARD, TRURO, PENZANCE, & FALMOUTH. - 1900. - - WILLIAM BYLES AND SONS, PRINTERS, - 129 FLEET STREET, LONDON, - AND BRADFORD. - - - - -INTRODUCTION. - - -The existence of the Autobiography which is published in the following -pages came to my knowledge in the course of a chance conversation with a -distant relative of the writer's family. The original manuscript has -been carefully preserved, and has been for many years in the possession -of Mr. G. H. Carter, of Helston. He received it from his father, the G. -Carter mentioned on page 1, who was a nephew of Harry Carter himself. -The memoir of the writer, which will be found in the "Wesleyan Methodist -Magazine" for October, 1831, was based upon information supplied by G. -Carter, partly from the manuscript and partly from his own knowledge. It -is now printed from the manuscript which was kindly lent to me for the -purpose by Mr. G. H. Carter. - -The part of Cornwall to which the autobiography chiefly relates is the -district lying between the two small towns of Marazion and Helston, a -distance of about ten miles on the north-eastern shores of Mounts Bay, -comprising the parishes of Breage, Germoe, St. Hilary, and Perranuthnoe. -The bay is practically divided into two parts by Cuddan Point, a sharp -small headland about two miles east from St. Michael's Mount. The -western part runs into the land in a roughly semicircular shape, and is -so well sheltered that it has almost the appearance of a lake, in fact, -the extreme north-western corner is called Gwavas Lake. From the hills -which surround it the land everywhere slopes gently to the sea, and is -thickly inhabited. The towns of Penzance and Marazion and the important -fishing village of Newlyn occupy a large portion of the shore, and -around them are woody valleys and well cultivated fields. To the -eastward of Cuddan is a marked contrast. There, steep and rocky cliffs -are only broken by two long stretches of beach, Pra Sand and the Looe -Bar, on which the great seas which come always from the Atlantic make -landing impossible except on a few rare summer days. With the exception -of the little fishing station of Porthleven there is not a place all -along the coast from Cuddan Point to the Lizard large enough to be -called a village. Inland the country is in keeping with the character -of the coast. Trees are very scarce, and the stone hedges, so -characteristic of all the wild parts of West Cornwall, the patches of -moorland, and the scattered cottages, make the whole appearance bare and -exposed. - -Porth Leah, or the King's Cove, now more usually known as Prussia -Cove,[1] around which so much of the interest of the narrative centres, -lies a little to the eastward of Cuddan Point. There are really two -coves divided from one another by a point and a small island called the -"Enez." The western cove, generally called "Bessie's Cove," is a most -sheltered and secluded place. It is so well hidden from the land that it -is impossible to see what boats are lying in the little harbour until -one comes down to the very edge of the cliff. The eastern side of the -point, where there is another small harbour called the "King's Cove," is -more open, but the whole place is thoroughly out of the world even now. - -The high road from Helston through Marazion to Penzance now passes about -a mile from the sea, but at the time of which Harry Carter was writing -this district must have been unknown and almost inaccessible. From all -accounts West Cornwall at that time was very little more than half -civilised. The mother of Sir Humphry Davy (born at Penzance, 1778) has -left us a record that when she was a girl "West Cornwall was without -roads, there was only one cart in the town of Penzance, and packhorses -were in use in all the country districts" (Bottrell, iii. 150). This is -confirmed by a writer in the "Gentleman's Magazine," who says that in -1754 there were no roads in this district, the ways that served the -purpose were merely bridle paths "remaining as the deluge left them and -dangerous to travel over" ("Gentleman's Magazine," October, 1754); and -by the official records of the town of Penzance, which show that in 1760 -the Corporation went to some expense in opposing the extension of the -turnpike beyond Marazion, to which place it was then first carried from -Penryn (Millett's "Penzance, Past and Present"). - -The places of which the names are mentioned in the autobiography, but -which are not shown in the map, such as Rudgeon, Trevean, Caerlean, -Pengersick, Kenneggey, and Rinsey, are all in the immediate -neighbourhood of Prussia Cove. They are merely little hamlets of four -or five cottages each, and there is no reason to suppose that they were -any larger one hundred years ago. Helston, the market town of the -district, is about six miles off, and had then a population of some two -thousand people. - -The chief interest in the autobiography is probably that which it -attracts as the most authentic account of the smuggling which was -carried on in the neighbourhood in the latter portion of the last -century. Cornwall has long enjoyed a certain reputation for pre-eminence -in this particular form of trade, and apparently not without some -reason. A series of letters of the years 1750-1753 were published some -years ago in the journal of the Royal Institution of Cornwall (vol. vi. -pt. xxii. p. 374, "The Lanisley Letters") to a Lieutenant-General -Onslow, from George Borlase, his agent at Penzance, asking that soldiers -might be stationed in the district, because "the coasts here swarm with -smugglers," and mentioning that a detachment ought to be stationed at -Helston, as "just on that neighbourhood lye the smugglers and wreckers -more than about us, tho' there are too many in all parts of this -country." In his "Natural History of Cornwall," published in 1758, Dr. -Borlase regrets (p. 312) that "the people of the sea coast are, it must -be owned, too much addicted to carry off our bullion to France and to -bring back nothing but brandy, tea, and other luxuries." This is -delicate, but there can be no doubt of his meaning; and he goes on to -complain that "there is not the poorest family in any parish which has -not its tea, its snuff, and tobacco, and (when they have money or -credit) brandy," all, we may presume, duty free. The will of Philip -Hawkins, M.P. for Grampound, who died on September 6, 1738, is perhaps -the most striking record, for he actually bequeathed L600 to the king to -compensate for the amount of which his tenants had defrauded the -Customs. - -That the smuggling prevailed to such an extent is not to be wondered at, -for the law must have had but a very slight hold on such a rough and -scattered population, living so far away from any of the large centres -of England. In such a narrow country too, where no one lives very far -from the sea, the miners took to smuggling as readily as the fishermen. -A trip to Roscoff or Guernsey formed a pleasant change after a spell on -tribute underground or working stamps. A rough, reckless, and drunken -lot were these tinners, and if riots and bloodshed were more scarce in -West Cornwall than in some parts, it must have been due to the judicious -absence of the Custom House officials, and not to any qualities in the -smugglers. George Borlase says ("Lanisley Letters") that in December -1750 a Dutch ship laden with claret was wrecked near Helston, and "in -twenty-four hours the tinners cleared all," the authorities apparently -not daring to interfere; and that just before this date a man who went -to the assistance of the revenue officers had been killed near the same -place. - -Beyond these I have mentioned, the literary records are very meagre, but -the whole county, and especially the western part, abounds with -legends. The smuggling was so universal, that every cove, and fishing -village on the coast has its own stories, and everywhere the curious -visitor is still shown the place where the smugglers landed their -cargoes, the secret caves where they stored them, and sometimes, but not -often, the places where the "officers" found them. Prussia Cove, beyond -all others, has the richest store of such history. Here are little -harbours cut out of the solid rock, which are now occupied by innocent -fishing boats. The visitor can see a roadway partly cut and partly worn -crossing the rocks below high water mark, and caves of which the mouths -have been built up, and which are reputed to be connected with the house -on the cliff above by secret passages. - -In the legends of the Cove the personality of John Carter looms so large -that his associates are almost if not entirely forgotten, and everything -centres around him alone. It was he who cut the harbours and the road, -it was he who adapted the caves, and he is the hero of most of the -tales which are told of the good old days. One of these stories is worth -recording. On one occasion, during his absence from home, the excise -officers from Penzance came around in their boats and took a cargo, -which had lately arrived from France, to Penzance, where it was secured -in the Custom House store. In due course John Carter returned to the -Cove, and learned the news. What was he to do? He explained to his -comrades that he had agreed to deliver that cargo to the customers by a -certain day, and his reputation as an honest man was at stake. He must -keep his word. That night a number of armed men broke open the stores at -Penzance, and the "King of Prussia" took his own again, returning to the -Cove without being discovered. In the morning the officers found that -the place had been broken open during the night. They examined the -contents, and when they noted what particular things were gone, they -said to one another that John Carter had been there, and they knew it, -because he was an honest man who would not take anything that did not -belong to him. And John Carter kept his word to his customers. The story -that he once opened fire on a revenue cutter from a small battery which -he had made at the Cove is well known along the coast. - -It is characteristic of the history of the smugglers everywhere that -they enjoyed the support of popular sympathy. This was certainly the -case in West Cornwall, where the farmers, the merchants, and, it is -rumoured, the local magistrates, used to find the money with which the -business was carried on, investing small sums in each voyage. Harry -Carter finding shelter at Marazion when the Government were offering a -reward for his capture (p. 26), and the action of the unnamed "great man -of the neighbourhood" on his return from America (p. 90), are perhaps -the reverse of the picture which George Borlase drew for General Onslow -("Lanisley Letters"); "the countenance given to the smugglers by those -whose business it is to restrain these pernicious practices, hath bro't -'em so bold and daring that nobody can venture to come near them with -safety whilst they are at their work." It is difficult to avoid the -conclusion that there must have been some powerful influence exerted in -his favour to obtain his exchange from prison in France in 1778, and -what else can we make of the commission to go privateering against the -Americans. The Government had then recently passed a measure[2] to -encourage privateering by authorising the Admiralty to grant -commissions, and apparently English sailors were everywhere readily -taking advantage of the opportunity so afforded for their enterprise.[3] -But to obtain such a commission the applicant had to find the security -of sureties, of whose "sufficiency" the commissioners were to satisfy -themselves, and also to send in a written application specifying the -ship for which the commission was asked, with full details as to the -number of her guns and other matters. He surely could not have ventured -to place himself in the hands of the Government in this way without a -friend at Court. It certainly seems a fair inference from their -popularity, their fame, and from the fact that they both rose to leading -positions amongst the smugglers while still comparatively young, that -Harry Carter and his brother John were superior men to the rough -material of which their crews were probably composed. - -The accounts of the actual smuggling in the following pages are not very -elaborate, but we must remember that at the time when Harry Carter was -writing (1809), John Carter and the "Cove boys" were still at it, and -Prussia Cove had not yet ceased to be a great centre of smugglers. This -would also explain the absence of any more particular reference to any -of his companions. This reticence, which we must respect, although we -may regret it, is quite compensated by the variety of his later -experiences. To have been a prisoner in France during the Reign of -Terror, and at a time when the Convention had decreed that no quarter -should be given to an Englishman,[4] is of itself no small claim on the -attention of his countrymen. From his account, which is, I believe, -unique in English literature, and especially when it is compared with -those of French writers, it would seem that the English, who were, of -course, prisoners of war, were placed on the same footing as the -"aristocrats" and "suspects," the great number of whom made it necessary -to utilise the convents and even private houses as prisons. Alexandrine -des Echerolles tells us ("Private life in Public Calamities") that -"Bread was distributed daily to the prisoners, and their pitchers were -filled every morning with fresh water. Those who could not pay the -turnkeys for their trouble got none, so the rich used to bestow alms -upon the poor in this form.... Once a fortnight, I think, they were -supplied with fresh straw, or what was called such, each person -receiving an armful." She mentions that by degrees the prisoners -managed to make themselves more comfortable by introducing tables, and -chairs, and mattresses, which they were compelled to leave behind on -their removal to other prisons. All this coincides very closely with -Harry Carter's account, and he seems to have shared their anxiety as to -the fate of his friends and the common anticipation of the guillotine. - -Even this does not exhaust the interest of his life. The very first -lines of his writing show the object with which he wrote. In no part of -England did the teaching and influence of John Wesley obtain such a hold -as in Cornwall. At the time of his first visit he speaks of the natives -of this distant country as "those who neither feared God nor regarded -man" ("Diary," May 17, 1743); he accuses them of wrecking and of -murdering those who were washed ashore, and describes their pastimes as -"hurling, at which limbs were often broken, fighting, drinking, and all -other manner of wickedness." The "Lanisley Letters" contain similar -charges of wrecking and murder, and Dr. Borlase confirms the statement -as to their drunken habits. In 1750 Wesley mentions how greatly all -these things were changed. They were, perhaps, not as much changed as he -thought, but undoubtedly they were greatly improved, for it is plain -fact that the whole of the moral reformation of the Cornish folk is due -to him. He gained followers so rapidly in the west that at the first -Methodist Conference in 1744, St. Ives is classed with London, Bristol, -and Newcastle; "from this it is evident," says Dr. Smith ("Hist. of -Methodism," i. 213), "that London, Bristol, St. Ives, and Newcastle were -regarded as the great centres of Methodism in England at this period." -At the third Conference (1746) Cornwall forms one district out of seven, -while the others included in some cases four and in one case six English -counties. In 1750 John Wesley ("Diary," August 18) says of St. Just, -"There is still the largest society in Cornwall, and so great a -proportion of believers I have not found in all the nation beside." -Similar societies or classes sprang up in the most remote places, such -as Rugan, or Rudgeon as it is more usually spelt now, where the society -met at which Charles Carter was converted; at Trevean and Caerlean, -where Harry Carter preached. - -That especial characteristic of Wesley's organisation, "the local -preacher," took root firmly in Cornwall from the very first. To those -who are not acquainted with the county it may be necessary to explain -that these laymen, earnest men of all classes, who preach, are so common -in every village that they constitute a distinguishing feature in the -local life. The services in the small wayside chapels which are so -numerous are usually conducted by a local preacher in the intervals -between the visits of the regular ministers. Those who do know Cornwall -also know the importance of the local preacher in the history of the -Methodist movement. John Wesley's preaching was received by the poor and -uneducated, the miner, the fisherman, and the labourer, and the -persecution of the clergy and the magistrates only strengthened the -enthusiasm of the people for their great teacher. From such men sprang -the first local preachers; preaching and exhorting not with the dull -formality of men who had to do it, but with the earnestness of men who -really felt that they had a message to deliver, and labouring under -uncontrollable excitement they greatly impressed their hearers: while -the familiarity of their persons led their audience to look upon this -new teaching as a thing of their own to which they could all attain. It -is impossible to doubt that the hold which the movement gained was -greatly due to these men, and Harry Carter was one of them. John Wesley -had set himself from the first against the smuggling which he found so -prevalent; he had preached against it at several places, and had even -published a pamphlet against it. We may therefore fairly suppose that -Harry Carter, the great smuggler, was regarded as a most important -accession to the ranks of his followers. - -The autobiography ends abruptly in the year 1795, but the writer lived -until April 19, 1829. The last thirty years of his life he spent at -Rinsey. He lived quietly, keeping himself occupied with a small farm, -and occasionally preaching in the neighbourhood. From the memoir of him -in the "Wesleyan Methodist Magazine," to which I have already referred, -I cull the two further facts that he retained the intensity of his -religious feelings up to his death, and that he never failed in grateful -recollections of James Macculloch--the Mr. M. of his French prison -experiences. Of his family I can learn but little. It is said that -originally they came from Shropshire, and certainly the name does not -show a Cornish origin. His father, who was called Francis, was born in -1712, and died on February 28, 1774; his mother, Agnes, was born in -1714, and died in 1784. Of the eight sons and two daughters of whom he -speaks, I can only trace four of the sons besides himself. Thomas, whom -he does not mention, was born in 1737, and died in 1818; and John, whom -he refers to as the eldest, Francis, born in 1745, and Charles, born in -1757, and died in 1803, are all mentioned in the autobiography. His -daughter, Elizabeth, as far as I can learn, died while young. - -In preparing the manuscript for publication I have taken the liberty of -omitting some passages here and there which were simply repetitions, and -which did not throw any additional light either on the narrative or his -character. I have corrected all the wrong spellings which could be -classed as simple mistakes, but I have carefully preserved all spellings -which appeared of interest, as showing the pronunciation of the words, -and especially those which illustrate the local dialect. For instance, -the general preference for "a" over the other vowels, and especially in -final syllables, is distinctly characteristic of West Cornwall. - -In some places, particularly towards the end, the manuscript is somewhat -damaged, and many of the pages have lost a portion of the lower corner. -The gaps so caused I have endeavoured to fill with the words which he -probably used, and such words are printed in italics. Where I have been -unable to suggest the missing words, I have left blanks. - - JOHN B. CORNISH. - - PENZANCE, 1900. - - - - -AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A CORNISH SMUGGLER. - - -As it have been imprest upon my mind for sevral years to take a -memorandum of the kind dealings of God to my soul, in particular these -laste two or three years, I have been persuaded by sevral of my friends, -in particular Mr. Wormsley and Geo. Carter. I have thought in general it -would be so weak that no person of sense would ever publish it to the -world, notwithstanding, this morning being 20 of Dec^{r.} 1809, I have -taken up my pen, and may the Lord bring past things to my remembrance -just[5] as they are, and if published to the world, may the Lord make it -a blessing to every soul that read and hear it for Christ's sake, amen, -amen. - -I have made sevral remarks at difrante times in years past of sume -particular things of my experience for my own amusement, then thinking -for no person ever to see it but myself only; and as I have made a -general rule more or less for sevral years to have had fixed times to -sit in silence to trace my whole life from 8 or 9 years of age, in -particular more so since I have tasted the goodness of God, moste -particular things that _I have_ past through seems to be tolerable -famil_iar_ to me. - -I was born in the year of 1749 in Pengersick, in the parish of Breage, -in the County of Cornwall. My mother had ten children, eight sons and -two daghturs, eight of whom lived to maturity. My father was a -miner--likewayse rented a little farm of about 12_l._ p^r year--who was -a hard labring man, and brought up his family in what we caled[6] decent -poverty. My oldest and youngest brothers were brought up to good -country scolars, but the rest of my brothers with myself, as soon as we -was able, obliged to work in order to contribute a little to help to -support a large family, so that I never was keept to scool but only to -read in what we caled then the great Book. As for our Religion, we were -brought up like the rest of our neighbours, to say some prayers after we -were in the bed, and to go to Church on particular times as occasion -sarv'd us. When I was aboute 8 or 9 years old, my brother Francis was -aboute four years older than me. He joined the methodist society in -Rudgeon,[7] soon after found peace with God, and as him and me was moste -times sleeping and waking together he revealed himself unto me, told me -the place and time he received the Comfarter. I seeing such very great -chainge upon him, as before time he was a very active boy, I farmely -believed the report. From that time I farmley believed that except I was -born again I should in no case see the kingdom of God, so that -convictions followed me sharp and often, sumetimes constrained to weep -bitterly. But alas! as I grew up they went fewer[8] and fainter. Aboute -9 or 10 years old went to work to stamps, and continued there until 15 -or 16. I worked to bal,[9] as I think, until I was aboute 17, and from -thence went with my two oldest brothers to Porthleah[10] or the King's -Cove afishing and smuggling, and I think aboute 18 or 19 went at times, -with Folston[11] people and sumetimes with Irish, as supercargo, whom we -freighted. Before this time I larned to write, and so far so, that I -would keep my own accounts. - -I think I might have been aboute 25 when I went in a small sloop, about -16 or 18[12] tons, with two men beside myself, asmuggling, where I had -very great success; and after a while I had a new sloop built for me, -about 32 tons.[13] My success was rather beyond common, and after a time -we bought a small cuttar of aboute 50 tons[14] and aboute ten men. I -saild in her one year, and I suppose made more safe voyages then have -been ever made since or before with any single person. So by this time I -begun to think some thing of myself, convictions still following sharply -at times. I allwayse had a dislike to swearing, and made a law on board, -if any of the sailors should swear, was poneshed. Nevertheless my -intention was not pure; I had sume byends in it, the bottom of it was -only pride, etc. I wanted to be noted to be sumething out of the common -way of others, still I allwayse had a dislike to hear others swearing. -Well, then, I think I was counted what the world cales a good sort of -man, good humoured, not proude, etc. But man is short sighted, who can -disarn spirets when the heart is deceitful above all thing and -desparately wicked, oftentimes burning and boiling within in a blaze of -passion, though not to be seen without. Nevertheless in the meantime was -capable to be guilty of outward sins the same as others of my -companions, and often[15] times, when went out on a party, crying and -praying to keep me from a particular sin, was often the first that was -guilty of committing it. Then conchance,[16] after staring me in the -face, oh what a torment within I feelt.[17] So I went on for many years -sinning and repenting. - -Well, then, in the cource of these few years, as we card[18] a large -trade with other vessels allso, we gained a large sum of money, and -being a speculating family was not satisfied with small things. Built a -new cuttar, aboute 197[19] tons, then one of the first in England; -expecting to make all our fortunes in a hurry. I was in her at sea in -Dec^{r.} 1777, made one voyage about Christmas. Returning to Guarnsey -light, sprung the bowspreat; was recommended from Guarnsey to St. Malos -for a bowspreat, and for the want of Customhouse papars and proper -despatchis was seized upon by the admiralty of the above place, where -they unbent the sails, took them onshore, and confined us all on board -with a gard of soldars as presoners, allowing two men to be on deck only -at a time; likenwayse their orders was for no person to come alongside, -no letters to pass or repass. But the comanding officer I soon got in -his favour, that I conveyed letters onshore, and sent an express to -Guernsey, likewayse to Roscoff, when there was soon certificates sent -them to certify what I was, as they stopped me under the pretence of -being a pirate; their pretence nevertheless was not altogether -unreasonable, I having sixteen carriage guns on board and thirty-six -men without any maritime pass, or anything to show for them. -Notwithstanding they certainly knew what I was. I think it was on the 30 -Jan. 1778, and I think the latter end of March[20] there was an embargo -laid on all English bottams. They keept me on-board with all the people -until I think the 1 May, when they took me onshore in order to examine -me, and about four o'clock sent with a strong gard unto the Castle. This -was a strange seeing unto me, the first prison I ever saw the inside of, -the hearing of so many iron doors opening, etc. So I was put up to the -last floor in the top of that very high Castle, in a criminal jail, -where there were a little short dirty straw, etc. So after looking round -a little to see my new habitation, I asked of the jailor to send me a -chair to sit on, and sumething to eat, as I took nothing for the day, -then seeming to be in tolarable spirits; but as the jailor left me, -hearing the rattling of the doors and the noise of the keys, I begun to -reflect, where am I now? I shall shorley never come out of this place -whilst the war lasts, shorley I shall die here, etc. I suppose in the -course of an half hour heard the doors and keys as before for a long -time before I saw any person, so in came a man with a chair, my bed, and -a little soup, etc. Well, then, I sat myself down in the chair, looked -at my dinner, etc., but then begun to weep bitterly. I had not loste -only my liberty but the cuttar also, which was my God. My liberty was -gone, my honour, my property, my life, and my God, all was gone; and all -the ten thousand pounds I expected to get privateering was gone, as -there was a commission sent for me against the Americans before I left -home. There I walked the dismal place bewailing my sad case. But in the -space of aboute two hours two or three of my people were sent to join -me, and before night I think about eighteen of us, small room full. Then -we begun to sing and make a noise, so that sume of my fears vanished -away; hope of life sprung up, and as the Franch was such flatterers in -general, a very little hope for the cuttar, etc. The remainder of the -ship's company put in the town criminal jail. We was all keept in prison -until aboute the 20 or 21 day of the same month, when early in the -morning were took out by a strong gard of soldars, sent to Dinan prison -of war, where we had then plenty of room, etc. I suppose we were aboute -six or seven of us that every evening joined to sing psalms in parts, -etc. But this would not satisfy me, I know there was no Religion in this -at all, but one night as I was asleep, as we lay on the floor side by -side, I dreamed that I heard like the voice of an angel saying unto me, -"Except thou reform thy life, thou must totally be lost for ever." There -was something more that he said, but I cannot now remember it. When I -awaked I was in a lake, sweat from head to foot, and all my body in a -tremble. Nothing but fear and horror upon my mind. The next day I passed -much to myself, very serious and sad, not one smile on my countenance, -but keept[21] it all to myself. Took great care to lett no person know -anything of the mattar. Well, then, as Cain went to build a city in -order to divert his mind, I begun to larn navigation, and so loosed my -convictions little and little, that in the course of aboute a fortnight -I could do the same as I formely uste to do. I think I was in prison -aboute five or six weeks until my oldest brother John[22] was brought to -join me, as he come to St. Malas just after I was stopped, from -Guarnsey, with certificates from the Governor, etc., in order to try to -liberate the cuttar and me. Well, then, this allmoste so great tryal as -any, he being the head of the family, and thought the business muste -come to an end at home. We was keept both in preson until, as I think, -sume time in August, and was sent on parol about forty miles in a town -called Josselin. However, we was keeped in difrante places in the -country until I think the latter end of Nov^{r.} in 1779, when we were -private exchanged by the order of the Lords of the Admiralty in the room -of two French gentlemen sent to France in our room. And then to come by -the way of Ostend, being, as well I can remember, aboute five hundred -miles. From thence came by the way of London, and arrived at home the 24 -Dec^{r.} in the same year. We found the family all alive and well, but -with the loss of the cuttar, and the business not managed well at home, -as my brother was then a presoner, and wanting from home aboute two -years, the family in a low state. Nevertheless, he being well respected -with the Guarnsey marchants, was offered credit with many of them. So -went on again in freighting of large vessels, and had very good speed -for sume time. I went again in the little cutter I had before, aboute 50 -tuns.[23] And after making two or three voyages to the King's Cove, went -with a cargo on the coast of Wales. In order to smuggle it, went onshore -to sell it. Left the cuttar to anchor near the Mumbles, where an -information was given to an armship called the "Three Brothers," that -lay sume distance from there. And aboute that time there had been some -large privateers' cuttars on that coast from Dunkirk, and had taken many -prizes, manned and commanded chiefly with Irishmen. My cutter was -represented to be one of them, namely, the "Black Prince," mounting -sixteen guns and sixty men. I had then in the cutter about six men and -three beside myself onshore. When they saw the armship coming upon them, -cut the cable and went to sea; and when the ship gave up the chase from -the cuttar, sent his boats onshore, took up the cutter's cable and -anchor, and found me onshore. I having left my commission on board, and -had nothing to show who or what I was, took me on board the ship as a -pirate, and after examining me in the cabin for two or three hours, -detained me as a prisoner for twelve weeks until I was cleared by my -friends at home through the Lords of the Admiralty. So after I was at -home some time, riding about the country getting freights, collecting -money for the company, etc., etc., we bought a cuttar aboute 160 -tons,[24] nineteen guns. I went in her sumetime asmuggling, and had -great success. We had a new luggar built, which mounted twenty guns, and -both went in company together from Guarnsey, smuggling along the coast, -so that by this time I begun to think sumething of myself again. -Nevertheless convictions never left me long together. But in the course -of this time, being exposed to more company and sailors of all -descriptions, larned to swear at times. And once, after discharging our -cargo, brought the both vessels to an anchor in Newlyn[25] Road, when we -had an express sent us from St. Ives of a large cuttar privateer from -Dunkirk, called the "Black Prince," had been on that coast and had taken -many prizes to go out in pursuit of her. It was not a very agreeable -business, notwithstanding for fear to offend the collector,[26] we put -round the both vessels to St. Ives Roade, and after staying there two -or three days, the same cutter hove in sight Christmas day in the -morning. We not having our proper crews on board, colected a few[27] men -together, and went to sea in pursuit of him. Soon come up with him, so -that after a running fight for three or four hours, as we, not being -half manned, and the sea very big, the shots so uncertain, the luggar -received a shot that was obliged to bear up, and in the course of less -then an hour after I received a shot that card of my jib, and another in -the hull, that we could hardly keep her free. So that we bore up after -the luggar, not knowing what was the matter of her running away. We came -up with her aboute five in the evning. Desired the Captain to quitt her, -but he, in hope to put her into Padstow, continued pumping and bailing -until aboute six, when he hail'd me, saying, stand by him, he was going -to quitt her. So that they hoisted out their boate, but the sea being so -bigg and the men being confused, filled her with water, so that they -could not free her nomore. I got my boat out in the meantime, sent her -alongside the luggar, so that some of the men jumpt over board, and my -boate pickt them up, and immediately the luggar went down. I hove to the -cuttar and laid her to, that she drifted right over the place that the -luggar went down, so that some of the men got on board by virtue of -ropes hove from the cuttar, sume got hold of the jib tack, and sume -pickt up by the cuttar's boate, so that we saved alive seventeen men and -fourteen drowned. As Providence would have it was aboute the full of the -moon, or certainly all must be lost. This was scene indeed. What cries! -what screeches! what confusion was there! We stayed some little time -there cruising aboute the place, but soon obliged to get the cuttar -under a double reefed trysail, a heavy gale of wind ensuing, and bore up -for the Mumbles. Now I am going to inform you of a little more of my -pride and vanity, the spirit of truth had not as yet forgot to strive -with me. Before we come up with the privateer, in expecting to come to -an engagement, oh, what horror was upon my mind for fear of death, as I -know I must come to judgment sure and sartin. If I died, I should be -lost for ever. Notwithstanding all this I made the greatest outward show -of bravery, and, through pride and presumption, exposed myself to the -greatest danger. I stood on the companion until the wad of the enemies' -shot flew in fire aboute me, and I suppose the wind of the shot struck -me down on the deck as the shot took in the mainsail right in a line -with me. One of my officers helpt me up, thought I was wounded, and he -would not suffer me to go there nomore. This was a great salvation, and -that of God, and not the only one; for all so many hundreds of shot have -flyed around me, I never received somuch as a blemish in one of my -fingers; but I can remember for many years before this, whenever I -expected to come to an engagement, I was allwayse struck with horror of -mind, knowing I was not fit to die; and since I have tasted of the -goodness of God, I have thought that the greatest hero in the Army or -Navy, as long as the spirit of Truth continue to strive with them, even -Anson, is struck with the like feelings; and if ever I hear of a coward, -I know this is the cause of it. - -In the year of 19th April, 1786, I was married to Elizabeth Flindel, of -Helford, in the parish of Manaccan, and in April 19, 1787, she bore me a -daughter, who was called after her mother's name, and I think it was -aboute midle of Nov^{r.} I went in a luggar, asmuggling, about 140[28] -tons, mounting sixteen carriage guns. After making one voyage at home to -the King's Cove I got a freight for Costan,[29] and as I depended on -them people to look out if there were any danger, according to their -promise, came into the Bay, and after sume time spoke with a boate from -the above place, saying it was a clear coast, there was no danger to -bring the vessel up to anchor, and we should have boats enough out to -discharge all the cargo immediately. So that I brought the vessel to -anchor, leaving the jib with the trysail and mizen set, and begun to -make ready, opening the hatches, etc., when I saw two boats rowing up -from the shore. I said to the pilot, "There is two boats acoming." He -answered, "They are our boats coming to take the goods out," etc. Soon -after a boat come alongside. "Do you know these is two man-o'war's -boats?" We immediately cutt the cable, and before the luggar gathered -headway were right under the starn. They immediately cutt off the mizen -sheet, and with a musket-shot shot off the trysal tack and boarded us -over the starn. My people having sume muskets, dropt them down and went -below. I knowing nothing of that, thought that all would stand by me. I -begun to engage them as well as I could without anything in my hands, as -they took us in surprise so suddenly, I having my great coat on buttoned -aboute me, I seeing none of my people, only one man at the helm; and -when they saw no person to oppose them, turned upon me with their broad -swords, and begun to beat away upon my head. I found the blows very -heavey--crushed me down to the deck--and as I never loosed my senses, -rambled forward. They still pursued me, beating and pushing me, so that -I fell down on the deck on a small raft just out of their way. I suppose -I might have been there aboute a quarter of an hour, until they had -secured my people below, and after found me laying on the deck. One of -them said, "Here is one of the poor fellows dead." Another made answer, -"Put the man below." He answered again, saying, "What use is it to put a -dead man below?" and so past on. Aboute this time the vessel struck -aground, the wind being about East S.E. very hard, right on the shore. -So their I laid very quiet for near the space of two hours, hearing -their discourse as they walked by me, the night being very dark on the -30 Jan^{y.} 1788. When some of them saw me lying there, said, "Here lays -one of the fellows dead," one of them answered as before, "Put him -below." Another said, "The man is dead." The commanding officer gave -orders for a lantern and candle to be brought, so they took up one of -my legs, as I was lying upon my belly; he let it go, and it fell as dead -down on the deck. He likewayse put his hand up under my clothes, between -my shirt and my skin, and then examined my head, and so concluded, -saying, "The man is so warm now as he was two hours back, but his head -is all to atoms." I have thought hundreds of times since what a miracle -it was I neither sneezed, coughed, nor drew breath that they perceived -in all this time, I suppose not less than ten or fifteen minutes. The -water being ebbing, the vessel making a great heel towards the shore, so -that in the course of a very little time after, as their two boats was -made fast alongside, one of them broke adrift. Immediately there was -orders given to man the other boat in order to fetch her; so that when I -saw them in the state of confusion, their gard broken, I thought it was -my time to make my escape, so I crept on my belly on the deck, and got -over a large raft just before the main mast, close by one of the men's -heels, as he was standing there handing the trysail. When I got over -the lee-side I thought I should be able to swim on shore in a stroke or -two. I took hold of the burtins[30] of the mast, and as I was lifting -myself over the side, I was taken with the cramp in one of my thighs. So -then I thought I should be drowned, but still willing to risk it, so -that I let myself over the side very easily by a rope into the water, -fearing my enemies would hear me and then let go. As I was very near the -shore, I thought to swim onshore in the course of a stroke or two, as I -used to swim so well, but soon found out my mistake. I was sinking -almost like a stone, and hauling astarn in deeper water, when I gave up -all hopes of life, and begun to swallow some water. I found arope under -my breast, so that I had not lost all my senses. I hauled upon it, and -soon found one end fast to the side just where I went overboard, which -gave me a little hope of life. So that when I got there, could not tell -which was best, to call to the man-of-war's men to take me in, or to -stay there and die, for my life and strength was allmoste exhausted; but -whilst I was thinking of this, touched bottam with my feet. Hope then -sprung up, and I soon found another rope, leading towards the head of -the vessel in shoaler water, so that I veered upon one and hauled upon -the other that brought me under the bowsprit, and then at times, upon -the send of a sea, my feete was allmoste dry. I thought then I would -soon be out of their way. Left go the rope, but as soon as I attempted -to run, fell down, and as I fell, looking round aboute me, saw three men -standing close by me. I know they were the man-of-war's men seeing for -the boat, so I lyed there quiet for some little time, and then creeped -upon my belly I suppose aboute the distance of fifty yards; and as the -ground was scuddy, some flat rock mixt with channels of sand, I saw -before me a channel of white sand, and for fear to be seen creeping -over it, which would take some time, not knowing there was anything the -matter with me, made the second attempt to run, and fell in the same -manner as before. My brother Charles being there, looking out for the -vessel, desired some of Cawsand men to go down to see if they could pick -up any of the men dead or alive, not expecting ever to see me any more, -allmoste sure I was ither shot or drowned. One of them saw me fall, ran -to my assistance, and taking hold of me under the arm says, "Who are -you?" So as I thought him to be an enemy, made no answer. He said, "Fear -not, I am a friend; come with me." And by that time forth was two more -come, which took me under both arms, and the other pushed me in the -back, and so dragged me up to the town. I suppose it might have been -about the distance of the fifth part of a mile. My strength was allmoste -exhausted; my breath, nay, my life, was allmoste gone. They took me -into a room where there were seven or eight of Cawsand men and my -brother Charles, and when he saw me, knew me by my great coat, and cryed -with joy, "This is my brother!" So then they immediately stript off my -wet clothes, and one of them pulled off his shirt from off him and put -on me, sent for a doctor, and put me to bed. Well, then, I have thought -many a time since what a wonder it was. The bone of my nose cut right in -two, nothing but a bit of skin holding it, and two very large cuts in my -head, that two or three pieces of my skull worked out afterwards; and -after so long laying on the deck with that very cold weather, and being -not alltogether drowned, but allmoste, I think, I did not know I was -wounded or loste any blood. And now, my dear reader, I am going to show -you the hardening nature of sin. When I was struggling in the water for -life I gave up all hope, I was dead in my own mind; nevertheless my -conscience was so dead asleep I thought nothing aboute Heaven or hell -or judgment; and if I had died then I am sure I should have awaked -amongst devils and damned spirits. See here this greate salvation and -that of the Lord. I have been very near drowned, I think, twice before -this, and have been exposed to many dangers many a time in the course of -time betwen the five years the lugger was loste in the North Channel and -this time, privateering, smuggling, etc., but I think conscience never -so dead as now. I stayed there that night and the next evening took -chaise. My brother and me, and the docter came with us so far as -Lostwithiel, and arrived at home the night after to brother Charles -house. I stayed there about six or seven days, until it was advertised -in the papers, I think three hundred pounds for apprehending the Captain -for three months from the date thereof, which set us all of alarm. So I -moved from there to a gentleman's house at Marazion. I think I stayed -there about two or three weeks, and from thence moved to Acton -Castle,[31] as my brother John rented the farm, the famely not being -there then, so that the keys and care of the house were left to his -charge, and after a few days removed to Marazion again, then afraid of -the shaking of a leaf. I think I might have stayed at Marazion for the -course of a fortnight, and then went to the Castle again.[32] I used to -half burn my coals by night in order that there should be no smoke seen -in the daytime. In the course of about three months, after my wounds -were nearly healed, I used to go at night to the King's Cove and there -to drink grog, etc., with the Cove boys until the gray of the morning, -convictions following me very sharp still at times. In my way home to my -dreary lodgings, the larks flying up in the fields around me, warbling -out their little beautiful notes, used to move me with envy, saying, -"These dear little birds answer the end they were sent in the world for, -but me, the worst of all creatures that ever was made." So that I have -wished many a time I had been a toad, a serpent, or anything, so that I -had no soul, for I know I must give an account for my conduct in this -world. Likewayse there was a gray thrush that sang to me night and -morning close to the house, which have preached to me many a sermon. - -In the daytime I chiefly spent my time improving my learning on -navigation, etc. I remember one Sabbath day, when I was at Marazion, I -heard some people singing of hymns. I think they were Lady Huntingdon's -people, when sincerely wished I had been one of them. I often[33] -thought there was very great beauty in religion, and when I have been -with others laughing and ridiculing the methodists, wished I had been -one of them, whom I thought best of them. See what hypocrite was here. -I remember aboute a year before this I went with my wife to Caerlean -preaching, on the Sunday afternoon, where I stood as near as I could by -the door. When the word fastened upon my mind, saying, "Thou art the -man." So that I was constrained to turn my face to the wall and weep -bitterly, with promises to mend my life, etc. But, alas! I had not gone -perhaps an hundred yards from the house until I joined my old -companions, so lost all my convictions. That was not the only time by -many when I have set up resolutions in my own strength to serve the -Lord, etc. Well, then, in the course of this time, whilst at this place, -my wife would come to see me, and sometimes bring the child with her, -and spend a day or two, so that I passed my time pleasantly whilst she -was with me. I think it was in the latter end of August my wife was -taken very poorly in consumption, being before of a delicate -constitution, and was allwayse obliged to come and go at night. I think -it was in the beginning of Oct^{r.} in 1788 when I went to Helford to -see her, in company with a servant man to brother John, one night, as -she removed from her own house to be with her mother. I found her in a -very weak state, and as I expected then soon to quit the country, I -stayed with her about two or three hours, when we took our final -farewell of each other, never expecting to see each other no more in -time. Oh, what a trying scene it was, to leave her in flood of tears. So -I arrived home to my dreary solitude a little before day. I, before -then, was greatly distressed for her soul, and through friends desired -Uncle James Thomas to visit her, so he did often. I think it was about -the 10 or 12 of the same month, when I was sitting upon a bench in one -of the ground floors, bemoaning my sad estate, I began to say to myself, -"I have loste my liberty, my property; I have loste my wife also"--as -she was the same as dead to me then--so I thought that if her life were -spared, it mattered little to me if I was to go to the West or East -Indies, so that I could only hear from her by letters, would leave me -some comfart. But that was taken away allso; so that when I was cutt off -from every comfart in this life, that I had not the least straw to lay -hold of, I begun to see the emptiness and vanity of everything here -below, and set up the resolution, God being my Helper, I will serve Him -the remnant of my days, so that I immediately fell to my knees and begun -to say, "Lord have mercy upon me. Christe, have mercey upon me," etc.; -and at that time I could not say the Lord's Prayer without form, if any -man would give me my liberty, being so long living without prayer. So, -then, as before time I used to divert myself in the daytime in looking -at the ships and boats in the bay, the men and cattle working in the -fields, etc., but now shut my eyes against them all; and if I had -business in the daytime to go to the top of the house, was with my eyes -shut. So I went on with the above prayer, sometimes in hope of mercy, -othertimes lost allmoste all hope. Oct^{r.} 24, in 1788, sailed from -Mounts Bay for Leghorn in the ship "George," Capt^{n.} Dewen, master. -Was put on board with a boate from the King's Cove, accompanied by -brother John, and I think I was allmoste like a dead man; thought little -or nothing consarning my wife or child, or anything in this world, but -was earnestely crying for mercy. I had a little cabin to myself to lodge -in, where there was only a single partition between me and the men. At -first it was a great pain to me to hear them swearing, but after a -little while took very little notice of it. I had sume very good books -to read with me, but they seem to be all locked up to me, as the natural -man cannot desarn the things of the Spirit of God, for they are to be -spiritualy desarned. I remember sumetimes reading, when I could not -understand, I should be so peevish and fretfull that I could heave the -book overboard. Then, oh, what a torment in my poor soul I feeled. Then -to think, surely the mercy of God is clean gone from me. Oh, what -burthen my life was unto me. At them times I seldom prayed then less in -secret than twelve times a day and night, and when I could pray with a -little liberty, I should be in hope of mercy, and at other times kneel -down and groan without one word brought to my remembrance, then allmoste -ready to give up all, saying, "Surely there is no mercy for me; all my -prayers is no use at all, God pays no respect unto them"; but still I -dare not give up praying. I could look back afterwards and see I was all -prayer. So I think I arrived at Leghorn in the latter end of December, -where I passed my Christmas. I think the first Sabbath after I came -there the Capt^{n.} asked me to go on shore to church with him, as there -was an English church and clergyman there. I gladly went. The minister -being a good reader, I saw in his countenance much gravity and -solemnity. I said to myself, "Surely this is the man of God," and -thought I was highly favoured to hear him. The next Sunday I gladly -went again, but on coming on board after the service was over, I was -told that sacrament days he did not scruple to go to the plays, and play -cards, etc., which poisoned my mind so with prejudice, I never went -nomore. In the course of all this time I never meet with one person to -give me one word of advice consarning my soul, but I laboured to keep -myself to myself so much as posable, still reading and praying with all -diligence. Well, then, the Capt^{n.} got a freight there to go to -Barcelona, to load with brandy for New York in America. I was very glad -when I heard of it, as I heard that there was methodists there, in hope -I should fall in with sume of them to give me a word of instruction. So -I think we sailed from Leghorn in the latter end of Jan^{y.} 1789. The -Lord still continued to strive with me, sumetimes in hope of salvation, -other times allmoste ready to give up all hope; but I still was diligent -in reading and prayer, but I was so ignorant of the ways of salvation -as I was at the first time I began to pray. I remember on my passage -there one day, scudding before the wind, very cold weather, and a very -big sea, looking over the starn. I thought I should be very glad to be -tyed in a rope and towed after the ship for a fortnight, if that would -get me into the favour of God. But alas! I know all such works would not -merit anything from God as salvation. I arived at New York on the 19 -April in '89, and aboute ten or twelve days before I arived there, I was -taken with a violent inflammation in one of my eyes, so I could see very -little on that eye and the other was much afected allso. So after two or -three days being there, there came a glasar[34] on board to put in a -pane of glass in the cabin windows. And as the Capt^{n.} and mate was -not presant, I thought it was my time to enquire out the methodists, and -as shame allways hunted me much, I begun to ask him aboute the defrante -persuasions of people there; at laste I asked, "Is there any of Mr. -Wesly's methodists here?" He answerd, "There is many." I asked him, "Do -you know any of them?" He answered, "Yes, many of them." I asked, "What -sort of people are they?" thinking, if he gave them a bad carakter, to -say no further. His answer, "They are a good sorte of people," so then I -asked him, "Do you know the precher?" He said, "I do, and I go to hear -him sometimes." I said, "Then I shall be obliged to you if you will send -your little boy with me to show me the precher's house." So after he -stared a little at me, said, "If you will stay a little until I have -done this job, I will ither go with you myself or git sume person that -shall." So that encouraged me very much, set me in high spirits, and -after a little further discourse, he told me his wife was a methodist, -and soon after took me to his house, where the dear woman received me -very kindly. And when she know I wanted to speak to the precher, she -asked me if I did belong to the connection in _England_. I answered, -"No, but I wants to speak to the precher." She said, "To-night is -publick meeting night. I will go with you a half hour sooner, when we -shall find Mr. Dickinson home." So accordingly we went together, where I -found the dear man and his wife in the kitchen. As soon as I looked at -him, I said to myself, "This is the man I wants to see; this is the man -of God." I said, "Sir, I should be glad to speak a few words with you." -So as there was no persons presant but his wife and the good woman that -come with me, said, "Say on." I said, "To yourself, if you please, sir." -So he took me into a small parlour and said, "What do you want of me?" I -said, "Sir, I am an Englishman, and belong to a ship in the harbour. I -know I am a great sinner, and as I am informed you belongs to Mr. -Weseley's people, I want to know what I must do." He looked at me and -said, "Do you think God would be just to send you to hell?" I was -surprised at such a question, did not know what answer to make. Then he -begun to say to this purpose, that Christe come to seek and to save that -which was lost, etc. He likewayse asked me, "Do you pray?" I said, "Yes, -a little." "Do you fast too?" said he. I said, "No, sir." So, after -asking me a few more questions he said, "There is a publick prayer -meeting here this evning, you may stay if you please." - -So I thought he paid me a very great compliment. I thanked him, and when -the time come, that dear woman took me to the _meeting_ house and put me -in a place to sit down. So after they had sung and prayed, the precher -gave an exhortation, and I thought all to me, so that I was a little -comfarted; and after the meeting was ended, the dear woman took me by -the hand, as I was half blind, and lead me home to her own house; and -the good glasar, her husband, lead me on board, with a strict charge not -to fail coming to see them to-morrow. So I gladly accepted of the -invitation, and when I came there she had brought one of the class -leaders and a good old woman to meet me, who gave me great encouragement -to seek the Lord. My eye still getting worse, and as I could not get -leeches as I used to do at home, applyed to a doctor, and he cutt the -small blood-vessels of the apple of my eye, and so lett the blood out. -So as the ship was going to Baltimore to load, I thought if I went in -her I should be in danger to lose the sight of one eye if not both, as -both was much afected. So, then, I concluded to stay there, where I -attended all the ordinance; some place to go to every night. And I think -it was aboute the 1 of May when I was asked if I would have a note of -admittance to meet in class. I thought it to be the greatest compliment -I ever received in all my life, and gladly accepted it; so that when the -leader asked my name, as he took me in surprize, I said "Harry." He -said, "Is that your sir name?" I said, "Yes." Then he asked, "What is -your Christian name?" I said, "Henry." So the people called me, sume -Mr. Harry and sume Capt^{n.} Harry, as the sailors I come with me _caled -me_ Capt^{n.} Harry; so that in the course of a very little time I got -more acquaintance with them dear people. I could see afterwards I was -hungering and thirsting after righteousness, but sometimes in hope of -mercy, othertimes allmoste ready to give up all. I used to walk out of -town every morning in sume solitary place to myself to read and pray; -and I know since that time if I wanted to know when the clock struck -twelve in order to go home, that the family should not wait for me for -dinner--I did hardely know much better when the clock had done striking -no more than when it begun--I had not the time to count two, for all my -soul was in a blaze of prayer. I think in the beginning of May, Doctor -Cook[35] come there to hold confarence. I wished to make myself known -unto him, but was afraid, as at that time I know very little aboute the -methodists--afraid of the shaking of a leaf. And for all[36] I was so -highly favoured with so much helps and means I could form no idea of -justifying faith. Sometimes I thought I should here as a man's voice to -speak unto me, other times think to see something with my bodily eyes, -other times think as if my body should be changed. I have thought many -times that there never was one so ignorant as I was in the ways of -salvation. Sometimes, if I could weep a little under a sarmon, or in a -prayer meeting, I should have some hope I was in the way, and sumetimes -feel the drawings of the Father, which would give me sume encouragement -and hope; other times, if I saw any persons weeping by me, should -complain of the hardness of my heart, and be allmoste ready to give up -all. Nevertheless I still continued praying--I supose seldom less than -twelve times in aday--and sometimes think whether the hindrance was -because I missed naming myself. Well, then, I have thought many a time -since of my unwillingness to belief, for all I was blessed with so many -helps and means. The prechers, and aboute six or seven people in -particular, took me by the hand and was like fathers, mothers, brothers, -and sistars, so that I often in the afternoon amongst sume of them dear -women and the prechers, drinking tea, &c.; and if I should sit with them -more than an half hour without sume of them should ask me something of -the state of my mind, I should be so much dejected, and say to myself, -"Surely I am beneath the least of their notice; how can I expect the -least of their notice?" and I remember one day went to the hospital to -preching. When the preching was over, the two prechers, Mr. Morld and -Mr. Cloude, in their way home, I drew nigh to them; thought to have some -conversation with them, and as they used to make so free with me, then -only spoke as I thought coldly. I was so much dejected in my own mind, -I thought I was the worst creature that ever was born, and that allmoste -all things cryed vengance against me. Another time I remember I went to -the precher's house to inquire after Mr. Cooper, he not being there that -presant, and as I went out to one door he came in to the other, I not -seeing him. - -Mr. Morld said to him, "Brother Carter was here inquiring after you." I -heard him, and was immediately struck with wonder to think a such man as -he should be so humble as to call a such poor creature as me, brother. -So these was some of the ways I was tryed. Some times up, sume times -down, sume times in hope and sume times allmoste ready to give up. -Notwithstanding all this I continued still in prayer, and I remember -when walked the streets I was like one with his eyes shut, crying for -salvation, and likewayse crying to the Lord that there might nothing -take my attention or the least of my afection from Him in this world. I -think I was there aboute three or four weeks, when I was asked why I did -not go to sacrament. I answered, "I am unworthy." The person answered, -"You are the very person that is worthy." So as he could not prevail -upon me to go, he told the preachers of it, and after class meeting on -the Sabbath morning, as they was going to a friend's house to breakfast, -asked me to go with them. They soon opened their commission, and asked -me to come to the sacrement to-day. I answered, I could not. They asked -my reason. I said, "Him that eateth and drinketh unworthy, eateth and -drinketh his own damnation," and immediately I burst out in a flood of -tears, and desired the company to pray for me. The whole large company -kneeled down, and prayed for me with great powar, so that I had not the -only wet face by many in the company, and after prayer took me to -reason, so I consented to go. And I went with much fear and trembling. I -feeled nothing particular in the ordinance, but ever after continued to -go. I think it was in the beginning of June I begun to abstain from -eating, and as I eate to the full before, I slackoned a little every -meal. I was afraid to fast for fear the family should take notice of me; -and aboute this time I sent home for sume money, then thinking to set on -a shop in C^{o.} with Rob^{t.} Snow, then thinking to leave my bones -there. So I still went on sume times thinking I was getting into -lukewarm state, other times a little hope of mercy, and sume times -allmoste despair of all mercy. But I remember 19 July I went to -preaching as usual, when, as the preacher was pointing out the -odiousness of sin, and the hartfeelt sorrow that a true penitent soul -feeled for it, he mentoned of a woman that had a cancer cutt out of her -breast a few days before, and when she was asked if the pain was not -very great, her answer was, "Not so great as when I was under -convictions for sin." I immediately concluded I was out of the way. I -had hardley the least hope left of Christ, Heaven, or happyness. So in -my way home in company with Mr. Cooper, a little before we parted he -said, "Capt^{n.}, what is the matter? You seem to be lowspirited -to-night." I answered, "Yes, and well I may." He said, "What then is the -matter?" I said "Did you not hear Mr. Morel saying aboute the woman that -had the cancer cutt out of her breast, and I am sure I am not in the -way, I never feeled such pain at all," etc. He said, "I am sure you are -in the way," and then begun to repeat the promises, etc. I thought I had -heard the same promises repeated hundreds of times before, but never in -such manner as at presant. Hope sprung up that the blessing was very -near to me. I went home to my lodgings, and after prayer opened the -Hymbook to-- - - Salvation, oh the joyfull sound, - What music to our ears; - A sovereign Balm for every wound, - A cordial for our fears. - Glory, honour, etc. etc.[37] - -I was allmoste ready to fly away. I went to bed, but did hardly sleep -all the night, praying and praising God. Never the less in all this I -did not believe that my sins was pardoned, but I hope God would do it, -and that soon. In the morning went to the man of God, told him how I -feeled, to which he gave me great encouragement. The next night went to -preaching aboute two miles out of town. I was still very comfartable, -but could not believe. The next day being 21, aboute two or three -o'clock in the afternoon, I went to pray that God would show me the -hindrance that stood between him and my soul, and that he would show me -by that man of God, or by some other means. After I rose up from my -knees I went to the man of God. He saw me coming, and asked me with a -smile, "Well, Captain, how is it with you now?" I answered, "I have been -just now praying that God would show me the hindrance that stands -between him and my soul, and take it away from me." He answered in his -usual pleasant way, "Nothing at all, Captain, only unbelief; but I -would advise you to spend moste of this afternoon in prayer, that God -would show you under the sarmon, or by some other means, before you go -to bed," etc. So I did according to his direction, and in the evning -went to preching in great expectation. And when Mr. Morel delivered his -text from the 15 chapter St. John, "Abide in me and I in you," and as he -went on a little, I thought, surely this is for me. Hope sprung up; but -after a little further I thought Mr. Cooper had been telling the precher -of what I had told him, which set me in doubting. But after he went on a -little further, I said to myself, "Whether he have told him or not, it -is for me," and I believed in that moment, so that I rejoiced with joy -unspeakable and full of glory. As soon as the sarvice was ended, lest -Satan should get an advantage over me, I told the preacher what the Lord -had done for me, and immediately Mr. Cooper, so that we rejoiced -greately together, to which the latter told me, "You must go in the -morning to such and such a ones" (mentioned six or seven houses), "and -tell them what the Lord have done for you, and forget not to sing and -pray with them." So I went according to his order, and told them that I -had received the comforter, so that we had a happy morning together. -Well, then, I went on my way rejoicing, no doubts, no fears, nither -hardly a temptation, until the end of ten or twelve days. So then I went -on, sume times on the mount with Peter and John, some times in doubts -and fears; and if I did not allwayse find my mind in a blaze of prayer -unto God, I frequent used to say to myself, "Now I am surely getting -into a lukewarm state," and so write bitter things against myself. -Aboute this time I begun to fast once a week, until aboute four o'clock -in the afternoon, and abstain to nearly half my fill. I think it was in -the later end of Augst when I received a letter from my mother-in-law -consarning my wife's death. I soon begun to reason if she was gone happy -or not, so that in the course of a few days after I used to go out by -night, and looking up towards heaven, wishing and praying to see her -vision, or to know by some means whether she was gone happy or not. And -one night, before I went to bed, I prayed earnestely to the Lord if he -would show me by dream or by vision. So that night I dreamed I was -amongst serpents and vipars, and the worst of venemest beasts, that I -had the hardest struggels to get clear of them, so when I awaked I was -in a lake of sweat from head to foot. Then I thought I had not done -according to the will of God. I continued in that state, with my harp -hanged upon the willows, could not sing one note for a thousand worlds -for all so much delight I took in it in times past, keep it all this -time to myself, so that I got myself into such wilderness state that I -could hardly tell if I was in the favour of God or not. But I think it -was to the end aboute fourteen days I opened my mind to Mrs. Snow, who -said, "By your own account your wife had good morals, and she _had_ also -the preachers and people to pray and instruct her; I have a good hope -she is gone happy. Nevertheless, whether or not, you must leave that to -God, it is a business you must have nothing at all to do with; and if -you continue to go on in this way, I am in doubt as you are in danger to -lose all your Religion." So we kneeled down and she prayed for me, and -immediately I went to a prayer meeting. The first hymn was, - - My God, the spring of all my joy, - The life of my delights, etc. - -I sung with a loud voice but with a wet face, so that the temptation -left me. Glory be to God for dear friends, etc. So I went on as before, -some times happy and other times in doubts and fears, but still getting -a little strength. - -I think it was aboute this time that I left of drinking water, and I -think it was in the beginning of September I concluded in my mind to -quit the town and go to Baltimore; and as there was a ship bound there I -spoke for a passage, and got most things ready for the voyage. But oh! -what a tryal it was to me to think of leaving of my New York friends, -where the Lord had helped me in such abundant manner, and then to go 700 -miles from there to a place and people I knew nothing of. I begun to -reason as before with the enemy of my soul, "Surely at last I shall -become a castaway, surely I shall be stripped of all my Religion!" I -suppose no man can conceive the misery I feeled in my own mind for the -course of aboute ten or twelve days; I have thought since that I never -had a greater tryal. But to the end of this time one night I went to -preching, where Mr. Asbery,[38] with his great loud voice, gave out this -hymn-- - - Tho' troubles assail and dangers afright, - If friends all should fail and foes all unite, - Yet one thing assures us, what ever betide, - I trust in all dangers the Lord will provide, - etc., etc.[39] - -I never heard that hymn before, and as he went on I was filled with such -faith and love I could trust and not be afraid; it mattered nothing to -me where I went, as I believed that God would be with me. I never opened -my mind to no person in the course of all this time, but I was thinking -to the same day I sailed, or the day before, and that only to desire one -of my friends when my money came from England to remitt it unto me. But -at that time, as I was so happy in God, and could trust him with both -soul and body, I thought I could trust his servant allso. So I begun and -opened all my mind to my Father Cooper, told him who and what I was, and -how I came there, and all my reason I had to quit the town, which was, -as my right name was H. Carter, and as I hailed as H. Harry, I thought -if I entered into business I must at times have business upon the -wharves,[40] amongst the shipping; and if I ever meet any person that -know me I should be branded as a hypocrite, and hurt my partner and -sadly wound the cause of God. He answered and said, "Capt^{n.}, as that -is the cause, I think you need not leave the place. If you think -proppar, I'll speak to the prechers and your leader, and appoint to meet -to one of your friends' houses one afternoon, where, I think, we shall -be able to settle all the business, but you must not be presant." -Accordingly they meet all together, those I was moste particular -acquainted with, so he opened the business. They all joined together, -and said, "He did this when in a natural state, not meaning to wrong or -defraud any man, for personal safety, and when we hear anyone call him -'Captain Harry' or 'Mr. Harry,' we must say his surname is Carter, as it -is the custom in England where there is two Captains of one family, the -one is called after his Christian name." So my old friend delayed no -time, but soon come with this full account to me where I rejoiced in my -great deliverer. I could not then doubt but this was the Lord's doings, -and it was marvellous in my eyes, so that the report soon spread aboute -the town. But moste of them, as they begun with "Captain Harry," so -continued; and I thought tho' their love was so great to me before, it -was increased if possible tenfold more so; so then I concluded in my -mind to stay, and thought to live and die there, and went on as before, -watching and praying, frequaintely complaining of my littleness of love, -weakeness of Faith, etc., until aboute the 19 of December, when I went -to class meeting on the Sabbath morning. Providence sent one there from -the County of Durham, in England, whose name was Hodgson. He lately come -to town in company with two excellent men from the same place, and as he -being a stranger, the leader desired him to speake to the people. So he -begun, saying how and when he was convinced of sin, when he was -converted, and when he was sanctified unto God; and after, exhorted all -that believed to only believe and see the salvation of God, and with -this language, "all things in Christe is now ready, all the fitness he -requires is to feel the need of him." So he preached a presant and full -salvation unto us. Such language I never heard before with no man. Now -in the course of this time I had been there Religion was not in a very -prospras state, few[41] convinsed and very few converted unto God, but -the people going on still in a steady state, so that we never heard -sanctification preached, or seldom prayed for, in publick, and amongst -the whole of the methodists that was there at that time, aboute, as well -as I can remember, 260 in all, and only two persons out of the whole -number that did perfess and enjoy the blessing of sanctification--my -Father Cooper was one, and an old woman the other. So that I thought if -I could receive that blessing to the end of three or four years, I -thought it would be a blessing indeed, etc. So then, after the meeting -was ended, as Mr. Hodgson and me lodged in the same part of the town, -went in company together. He begun to ask me who I was, etc., so that I -gave him a true description of how long I had been in town, and what the -Lord had done for me since I had been there. When I had done speaking, -he said, "Well, my brother, be thankfull for what the Lord have done for -you, and ask for more"; and some thing in this way, "Go on to -perfection, it is the will of God, even your sanctification. Do you -believe these things?" I answered, "I believe in the doctrine of -sanctification, but I cannot believe the promise is to me." He asked for -what reason, I said, "I am a poor egnarant person, and it is not more -than five months since I am justified, and there is a great number of -excellent men and women in this town that is usefull to their fellow -creatures in praying in publick, visiting the sick, instructing the -ignorant, etc., they do not perfess this blessing at all, and how can I -expect it, who am good for nothing, and so unworthy and unfit for it." -He answered, "All the fitness he requires is to feel the need of him. -The promise is for you; only believe, and see the salvation of God," -etc. So the discourse I had with him set my soul all of a flame, the -blessing seemed to be nigh me. I went home and fell to my knees in -prayer. I thought I was just ready to laye hold of it, but unbelief -hindered me; but the hope of the blessing being so very nigh, made me -rejoice in abundant manner. I was very happy all that day and the next -day allso, still in earnest expectation to receive the blessing. But the -day following went to a prayer meeting, being on 21 December, where I -meet Mr. Hodgson providentely, and after the meeting he asked me to go -home to his house with him. I gladly embraced the opportunity, and after -a little conversation by his fireside the Lord enabled me to believe in -him for full salvation. I immediately told him, saying, "Glory be to -God, I do believe." So after we sung and prayed, he said, "You must go -in the morning and tell your friends of what the Lord have done for -you; this blessing may not be given for your sake only, but for others -also." So I parted with him, and went home, jumping,[42] and leaping, -and praising of God. And the next morning, according to his order, I -went from house to house, and told the six or seven familes that I was -moste particular acquainted with what the Lord had done for my soul, so -that we rejoiced greately together, they farmely believed the report. -And I have thought many times since, as if I hard them say, "Now we see -God have no respect of persons. This poor ignorant Englishman have been -here with us only a few months, have been justified and sanctified, and -surely if this blessing is to be attained too, we will never rest until -we receive it." So that the preachers and people were all in alarm. In -the course of a few days there were new prayer meetings set up upon -allmoste every quarter of the town, so that in a very little time the -Chapel would scarcely hold half of the people, and the Lord begun to -pour a lot of his spirit upon the people in a wonderful manner--some -crying for mercy, others standing up rejoicing and praising of God that -they know their sins was forgiven them; likewayse others rejoicing, -saying that God spake the second time, "Be clean," and cast out all -their inbred sin; and oh, what a glorious work was there. I know one of -my friends going home from a prayer meeting one night, aboute two or -three o'clock in the morning, called to another friend's house, knocked -him out of bed, and told him that God cleansed him from all -unrighteousness. They both joined in prayer, and they wrasled with God -until the other experienced the same blessing allso. So that with the -noise and brusel[43] of the people the world seemed as it were turned -upside down. The Calvinests, Baptists, Universalists, Quakers, with the -people of the Establish Church, all seemed to rise up in arms against -it. Sume said the devel was amongst the methodists, sume one thing, sume -another; but the work continued to go on in a glorious manner, so that -in the course of aboute two or three months the society increased from -aboute 260 to more than 500. It was then good times indeed, praise be to -God. I have had the pleasure to see many revivals since, but I think I -never saw greater heroes for the work then my dear friends in New York; -and I think the people there then was sumething like the primitive -Christians, going from house to house in fellowship one with another, -declaring the wonderfull works of God. Well, then, I am now going to -return to myself. I think it was in the beginning of January, in 1790, -when there was a meeting set up caled the "Select Bands," meant for -those that was sanctified, and those believers that was pressing hard -after it might join if they pleased. So I think there was aboute twenty -that perfess sanctification joined, and aboute ten more that was crying -after it. I think that was a scool indeed, to hear so many sensible men -and women to stand up to tell of their experience from the beginning to -the presant, and I never was a greater wonder to myself than to be -permitted amongst such people, as I was the youngest in the way and the -moste ignorant of them all. So I still continued in all the -ordinesses,[44] using not less secreat prayer than when I begun to seek -the Lord, my soul moste times in a blaze of prayer. - -I think it was in aboute the middle of Jan^{y.} when I went one morning -to the preachar's house in C^{o.} with Mr. Coopar, where there was -sevrall of the leaders, consulting where they should hold prayer -meetings, and how they should car[45] them on. I went home to my -lodgings, and seating by the fire I begun first to reason, saying, -"Everyone is imployed, all have sume thing to do exepting me, and I am -good for nothing, no use to society, but as a dead dog in the way." - -Well, then, as I was a long time in expectation to have remittance from -home, my money being done, and being in debt about 38 shillings for my -board, I said to my creditor, "I have gave up all hope of having any -money from home, I muste begin to work aboute sumething, but what or -where I know not. If I work in town the people will brand me for a -decever, as I have said I have sume property and sent home for sume, so -I fear it would much hurt the cause of Christ. I should be glad to have -your advice in the case." He answered, "What you owes me is but a -trifal, you need not go anywhere to work on my account. You are welcome -to stay a month or two longer, perhaps your money will come; and if not, -do not make yourself uneasy aboute it." But, however, my friend Hodgson -aboute that time went upon Long Island to live, so that I spoke to him -for lodgings and went with him, thinking I should be out of the way of -censure. So the 12 of June I car'd my little sea bed there, and laid it -in one corner of his room as he had nither steed[46] for me; so the -next morning, being 13, went to work to a farmer aboute a mile and a -half from the little town where I lived, and was sent to the field to -hoe Indian corn in company with a negro. The work was very strange unto -me, but soon after begun fell into discourse with him, and I rejoiced to -hear he belonged to New York society. We worked the forenoon in the -field together, where I was pleased and profited with his conversation; -the afternoon being hard rain, we worked shifting of straw, etc., in the -barn, when come the farmer, as I could not mow hay, etc., paid me my -wages, and directed me in my way home to a cousin of his, whom I caled -upon, and he told me to come the next morning. Accordingly I did so, who -sent me in a field to do the same work, when aboute seven or eight -o'clock I was joined with a man to work with me, who was part owner of -the field. I worked until breakfast time, when I was caled in to -breakfast. I could eate nothing, but drink a little milk, the same to -dinner. The man that worked with me, as he could do much more work than -me, desired me not to work to hard, but by three or four o'clock the -blood was running between my fingers, and my body so weak, all moste -ready to drop down. The man that was with me asked me no questions -consarning who or what was, but a little before we left work went to a -publick house and brought me a little rum and water, and desired me to -drink again and again. I gladly took a very little of it, and should -have taken more, but I thought, as he know me to be a methodist, he did -it in order to trap me; but I saw after the man had no such desire, so I -gladly received it with thankfullness both to God and him. So I went -home rambling, with a tired body, as one that was much intoxicated. The -next morning went to the same place again, but wore gloves to hide my -bleeding hands; and as their hours was from aboute sun rising, and stop -a little to breakfast and dinner, and work until sun set, and as my body -was wasted and weakened before with much fasting and abstinence, and -had hardly dirted my finger scarcely for nearley twenty years before, my -body was allmoste ready to crush under the burden. Oh, what a change was -this indeed! And as I used before to pray not less than twelve times in -a day in secreat, I had no opertunity at that time but a few minuts -before I went to work, and find a little house or sume bye corner to -breackfast and dinner; and when I got home in the evning, where the -family was allmoste ready to go to bed. But I can realy say, to the -glory of God, I never was so happy in all my life as I was at that -_time_. So I staid there two or three days to finish that _job_, and -after put in a field to work to myself some _distance_ from the house, -and furder[47] from my home, where my employer told me, "You may lodge -here if you will." I gladly accepted the offer, and the first night I -was took into a room in one end of the farm house and showed my bed, -where there was an old negro woman, and a little black boy with her. I -looked at my bed, the room, and my company, and I think I never saw a -meaner bed in all the course of my life. Stripped of my clothes and -turned in, in full expectation that they was going to sleep with me, as -I saw no other bed or place else for them. But whilst I was thinking of -this, I saw there in one cornar of the room a little ladder, where they -both went up together. I was there, I think, three or four days in that -field to myself, and I think it was the second day, aboute eleven -o'clock, I stood in the field and leaned upon my hoe, and could not tell -whether I should drop down under my burthen or stand any longer, the sun -allmoste over my head, the wind very little, and took hardely anything -to sustain nature. And I worked harder than perhaps I was required to, -and that for two reasons--the one for fear that they should know I was a -broken _gen_telman, and if known, I should not have work to _do_. _The_ -other, I must do justice unto my employer. Wilst I was thus at a stand, -calling to the L_ord_ for help, I saw a light shone brighter then the -light of the sun, that filled me with such faith and love, I went on -again like a giant refreshed with new wine, praising and blessing of -God. Oh, what happy times I had every moment. After I had done the -field, he had no work more for me, so I returned home and got work a day -or two in a place. I keept all what I feeled to myself, no murmuring, no -complaining; but when my dear friends in New York come to hear of it, -they agreed together to contribute to my maintenance, and take me off -from there, and sent me word to be home one day, as they were coming to -see me. Accordingly the day came, when six or seven women come according -to promise, and after sume conversation opened their business, but in a -very feeling manner. I thanked them, and said "I surely am not too good -to work; I have read of sume that have worked for their own bread that I -am unworthy to wipe their shoes or snuff their candle." So we passed the -afternoon together in singing and praying. I saw them to the boate, -where they made me promise not to fail to come to see them every Sunday, -and, if possible, Saturday night. - -After three or four days, working a day in a place, I went to work with -a farmer near the place I worked before, where I went to hoe Indian corn -with five or six negero slaves. They behaved unto me very civil indeed, -desired me not to work too hard; and as the poorest workman amongst them -could far out do me and do my best, but one or other allwayse helped me -on, so that I kept _close_ up with them. I was, as well as I can -remem_ber_, with them six or seven days, and that time sleeped in a hay -loft.[48] My suffering was not all over, as yet; I could eate very -little, and in the morning, when I went to work, allmoste so sore and so -tired as in the evning; and I could hardly say I could sleep at all, at -times just forget myself only. All this time nither master nor any man -ever asked me who or what I was, they only know I was an English man. -They all treated me very civily, and when they had done with me they -would ask me my demands. My answer was, "What you please"; so they -allwayse gave me the same as another common labourer. Aboute this time I -was asked to go with a mason to repair a mill dam; it was to be repaired -with turf, and I had a small flatt bottam boat to carry the turf across -the pool. So I went with him upon this conditions, if I could do the -work, to give me what he pleased. I expected at first he was to be -allwayse with me, but just showed me my work and left me to myself, only -sume times come to see me, once in the course of two or three days. I -then lodged and boarded myself to freind Hodgson's. The place was in a -bottam,[49] in mirey ground, and the weather very hot, that the sweat -would run over me in large drops, as if any person was heaving water -upon me. I think I went to work about sun rising in the morning, I -supose aboute five o'clock, stop aboute half hour to breakfast, _only_ -an hour to dinner, and then work until sun set, I supose aboute seven. -My breakfast and dinner was a piece of bread I card with me, and I went -to a farm house for a little milk. When my employer come to see me, he -would moste times bring with him a little rum and a cup, and as there -was a will[50] close by, "Come," said he, "rest yourself a little; let -us go and have a drink together." What a change indeed was workd upon -me; before time, when I was, as it were, a gentelman, I could not tuch a -dram before dinner upon any account. But then how glad and how thankfull -I was to receive it. But after the first fortnight or three weeks my -bones was become a little more hardened, my sufferings was not -alltogether so much, and I have thought many a times when my sufferings -was to the greatest, that if it was the will of Providence I would -gladly continue in the same all the days of my life. So every Sabbath -day I went to New York to see my friends in the morning and return back -again in the evning. - -I think it was in the later end of July when Mr. Dawson, one of them -English men I before mentioned that came from the County of Durham, came -over to inform me that if I would go home there was a vessel that would -be ready in the course _of_ a week's time, and he was going to England. -I th_anked_ him and went to New York, and asked the advice of my -friends. They all, as the voice of one man, said, "Surely this is the -Lord's doing; go, the Lord will be with you. We believe that it will not -be in the power of man to hurt you, but you must not think it strange if -you receive strong tryals from the Captain." The Captain was an English -man that come there from the West Indies, and had been in town for, I -suppose, six or seven weeks; a man that did profess Religion, and did at -times stand up in publick as a preacher, but of Calvinist principles. -And as I know him before, I went and asked him for a passage, then -fully believing it was my duty, and I thought I could trust the Lord -with my both soul and body. So he was quite agreeable, and then, as I -was not acquainted with the man, opened all my mind unto him, -notwithstanding for all the hints I had concarning him before. So he -asked me if I was a navigator, and if I could work, etc. I answered I -had my quadrant and books with me. So I agreed with him to be landed in -Mounts Bay, or close to the East of the Lizard Point, and then returned -back to Long Island, and told my employer I was going at home. He -desired me to stay a few days longer with him to finish the job, to -which I consented. And I think aboute the 3 or 4 of august, when we -settled our accounts, he paid me very handsomely. I returned to New -York. I paid off all my debts and bought myself sevrall little -_seafar_ing clothes for the voyage, and I think I had four pence in -_coppe_rs left. Well, then, here was a change in deed--from _such_ hard -labour to ease again. So I staid there with my dear friends, going from -house to house as before. I think I was allwayse rejoicing and praysing -of God, and still using the same self-denial by abstaining from food as -before time, and not only then, but allso when I was to my hardest -labour. I staid there until the 13 August, when took breakfast with my -old and first friend the glasar, and after breakfast he took a dollar -out of his pocket and said, "I insist on you to accept of it." I thanked -him, and I took it, so went on board, and that day got to an anchor in -Sandyhook, and the next morn sailed for England with a fair wind and -fair weather. The vessel was a small sloop aboute 40 tons,[51] bought by -the Captain then in New York, but the papars draw'd in the mate's name, -under cover him being an American. The cargo was coopers' timber, and -the whole crew was the Captain, mate, two boys, Mr. Dawson, and myself. -I keept one watch with the biggest boy, I suppose aboute 16 or 17 years -old; and the mate keept the other watch with the other boy, I suppose -aboute 13 or 14 year old. We was not more then a day or two at sea -until Satan begun to rage and roar. The Captain set his face against me. -Try my best I could do nothing to please him. He pretended to know all -things, but did hardly know anything of the sea or business. Then I -thought of what I was told by my friends in New York, so that I was not -the leaste disappointed. I acted in the capacity of steward and as cabin -boy, to bring all things to his hand as a gentelman, and if there were -anything short I stayed without it; so that I had plenty to do to try to -please him, besides keep my regular watch on deck night and day. We had -a fair wind until we came upon the banks of Newfoundland. Then the wind -took us ahead and blow fresh; for a little time the vessel made some -water upon one tack. He said, "We will bear up for Boston." I think, for -all he was a professor of Religion, I never saw a man more afraid of his -life in all my life. I thought that if we put in to Boston I never -should fetch home in that vessel. I opposed him, and said, "There is no -danger, I will engage to keep the pump in my watch." Mr. Dawson said, "I -will keep it in the other," tho' he know nothing of the sea. The mate -then joined us, and amongst us all gained our point, so that soon after -we had a fair wind again. - -We had moste times publick prayers in the morning, sume times Mr. Dawson -and sume times him, but still continued with his face set against me, -and poor Mr. Dawson dare not speak one word in my favour, as he was full -so much afraid of him as I was. And the two poor boys, I think in the -hardness of my times it never was in my power to treat two dogs as he -treated them. So one day, after we come into soundings, I said, "The -Land's End bears so and so, it is time for you to alter your course if -you land me there." So as he pretended to keep a reckning he said to the -contrary, but never let us see his journal, the mate and me, within two -or three miles of each other,[52] so that I thought he had no mind to -land me in the Mounts Bay, according to promise, the weather being fair. -Saw a sail, and as it was not the first time by many, said to me, as I -had the helm, "Bear down to speak with him." I did so. He said, "Keep -her so and so." I said, "Sir, if you keep her so, you never will speak -with him." He begun to belch out, "What is that to thee? I say keep her -so." So as I had given up all hope of being landed there, I thought it -was time to take a little courage. I left go the helm, and said, "Keep -her so your self, if you please," and I immediately went below and -turned in in my cabin. In the course of a little time he came down and -said sume thing to me in a very surly manner. I answered, "Sir, you have -not behaved unto me as a man since I have been with you. I have answered -every end I engaged with you for, and much more so, and now I see you -are entirely off your word with me, as you know you was to land me in -the Mounts Bay, or a little to the East of the Lizard." He begun to bale -out, "Thou doste profess the spirit of Christe, but thou haste the -spirit of the devil," and so on in a great rage, my poor friend Dawson -presant fearing and trembling but dare not speak one word; and I have -thought that good man suffered during the voyage much more on my account -than I did myself. So I did not render railing for railing, said -nothing, or very little more. This was in the evning, and in the course -of aboute half hour after, when he come to himself, he came to me and -said in a very good humour, "I should be glad if you would turn out and -come on deck, I wants to speak with you." So he took me forward on the -bow out of the sight and hearing of any person, and said sumething to -this purpose: "I hope you'll think nothing of all that is past, and I am -going to tell you why I cannot be to my word with you to land you in the -Mounts Bay. I sarved my time to a hatter in London, and as there was a -brig there loaden with hats and other goods, I took her away under the -pretence of being supercargo, etc., unknown to the owners. I sold the -vessel and cargo in the West Indies, bought the sloop you see me come to -New York in, sold that sloop there, and bought what we are in at -present. I told you and others I was bound to London, but I meant to go -to Dunkerk and send for my wife to London. I mean to sell my cargo and -then to return to New York again, for if I am known in any part of -England I shall be apprehended and hanged. So now lett me beg you to -keep it a secret. And I have the favour likewayse, as you know there is -no draft for the Channel on board, I knows nothing of the Channel, and -the mate quite unacquainted, let me beg you to do your best to car the -vessel to Dunkerk." I answered, "I will do everything in my powar," etc. -These was the tener of our discourse, etc. So that when he had finished, -I thought I was allmoste lost in wonder and astonishement. I thought my -case was bad, but his tenthousands times worse. So I turned to work -again with a willing mind, knowing nothing should happen unto me -against the knowledge of God, nither without his permision, and I -believed all things should work together for my good, and so went on my -way, rejoicing and praising of God. - -The weather still very fair and a fair wind. The next morning saw the -Start Point, and so made the best of our way up Channel. When came a -little to the west of Folston,[53] Mr. Dawson was put onshore, to go to -London in order to fetch the Capt^{ns.} wife to him to Dunkerk, and soon -after fell in with a fleet of West Indiamen, with sevral cutters and -frigats, with their boats out, bring them to to press their men, as at -that time there was a little quarrel between the Spanyards and English. -We passed through them all with our American coulers set, expecting to -be brought to every moment; and as I was the only Englishman onboard, -the Capt^{n.} advised me to hide myself in the bread locker. But I -thought, if they had come on board and found me, I must be gone; so I -thought if it was the will of Providence that I should be pressed, let -his will be done; and I thought if they should come on board and ask me -if I was an Englishman, I should say nothing to the contrary. That if I -was stationed on the tops, or anywhere else, God would be with me, and -all things should work together for my good. The same day, aboute three -or four o'clock, got close in to Calais, where we took a pilot for -Dunkerk the same evning, on the 16 September in '90. And as we went up -the harbar I saw in a brig's starn, I think, the "Bettsey, Truro." I -thought if there was any place caled by that name out of Cornwal, but -the next day, as the Capt^{n.} and I was so great he could then not go -onshore without me, neither eate nor drink without me, I was then with -him as it were all and in all. It was a great chainge indeed, whether -through fear or love I know not. So the next day I, as a complement, -asked him to go on board with me to see what the brig was. So it proved -to be from Truro, from Petersborg, loaden with hemp and iron, there -wind bound, and bound to Daniel's Point[54] the first fair wind; and as -I did not want to make myself known unto him as an Englishman, I thought -I would lett him know that I know some jentelmen at Falmouth, and after -a little discourse sume in Penzance; so after a while, he naming of one -and another until he come home to our family, and added, "Poor felows, -they have had a great many and very great misfortings of late years. -Harry, poor felow, lost a valuable lugger, with a valuable cargo, and -was obliged to leave his Country, being taken with sume manawar's boat. -I saw him in Leghorn, dined and supped with him, and from there he went -to America. I have not heard anything concarning him since; whether he -is dead or alive, I know not, poor felow." So at laste I said, "I am the -man, and I desire the favour of you to give me a passage home." He -stared like a man frightened, and said, "I never saw such chainge on any -man in my life, and I had no more knoledge of you no more then if I -never saw you. Anything in my powar I will gladly do for you. Do you -want money, or anything else? You'l make free with me. I am sorry I -cannot take you to sleep with me, as the cabin is full of hemp, etc. Be -not afraid of being pressed, as all my men is protected, but you shall -not be pressed unless they press me also." Here I was loste in wonder, -love, and praise, seeing how I was presarved the day before from a -manofwar, and I looked upon this as if the Lord had worked a merical to -send the brig there as if it was on purpose for me. - -The Capt^{n.} used that trade for sume time, but never put into any -harbour in France before, but now struck upon a sand bank, and put in -there to be repeared, as he had receved sume damage, etc. Well, then I -could but only wonder and adore the goodness of God, shorley his paths -is in the deep and his ways past finding out. So then I returned again -to my little sloop. I staid in Dunkerk eleven days, then sailed for -England, arrived at Daniel's Point the 1 Oct^{r.} The same night, -aboute nine o'clock, arrived home to Kenneggy,[55] to B^{r.} Charles's. -So I was received as one rison from the dead, as they know nothing of my -coming home, nither had heard from me for aboute twelve months. So after -a little I related what cause I had to come, and after I had settled my -business I was minding[56] to return to New York again. He said, "I will -send for our brothers in the morning, and praps we may find sumething -other wayse." So earley in the morning they come, and said, "If you go -to America again we shall never see you more; we think you may stay at -home in safety, there is no person will meddle with you, but we advise -you first to go aboute this neighberhood as publick as you please, where -you are well known, but shun the towns, and after a few days there will -no person take notice of you." - -I very gladly consented to what they said, this being on saturday. First -went to the King's Cove to see the Cove boys, and for all I was not -more than aboute two years from them, not one of them know me until they -heard me speak. The next morning being the sabbath, went to Trevean[57] -to preaching, where I had a blessed time indeed. After preching I was -surounded with allmoste all the congregation. Every one glad to see me, -but in particular the methodists, as they heard before that there was a -chainge of mind passed upon me. This made me to wonder and adore the -goodness of God unto me, as I did not expect to see any person when I -came home but only my own family. This was a wonder indeed to think I -was once more returned to my native country, amongse my own family, -friends, and the people of God. Well, then, after atending the preaching -and meetings a few times was desired to give out a hymn and speak in -prayer, but at first I refused, as I did not exercise in that way before -I come home, only at times I was sent to visit the sick with Father -Cooper when he could not attend himself. So I refused, but after -suffered great pain of mind, so that at laste I took up the cross with -much fear and trembling, and immediately went aboute like a town crier, -telling the people what the Lord had done for my soul. - -See what a chainge was here taken place; a little while before labouring -in the fields with the poor negroes, and used like a slave, and looked -upon with contempt on the greatest part of my passage home; so now I had -nothing to do with the world, all things was provided for me, so that in -a little time the congregation begin to increase greately, and prayer -meetings set on in many defrant places; so, as far as I can remember, in -the course of eight or nine weeks there was a great number of men, -women, and children converted. Our meeting seem to be all in confusion, -sume praying, sume singing, sume crying, sume praising and blessing of -God. We have staid in the house sume times from twelve until three -o'clock in the morning. My heart at that time, with every powar of my -soul, was fully engaged in the work; one time in particular, I trust I -shall never for get it, in prayer in the after meeting, I think Mr. -Wacktings was the preacher, whether in the body or out of the body I -could harely tell. It was just the same as it was in New York, and car'd -on in the same manner. At the first sume of the old members would not -owned it to be of God, as it was so much out of the comman way, wilst -many others put their shoulders to the work, and, praise be to God, -aboute this time I do remember my soul through mercy was got just in the -same tune as it was in New York. I declard at that time to sevral old -members consarning my thoughts. Sume would give me great incoregement, -wilst other would try to drive me back. I mentioned this, if ever this -should be published, which in all probability it will not, for thou, my -young Reader, to take care who to declare thy mind to, for it is not -evry old prefessor that knoweth moste of the things of God, but in the -genral him who's soul is most alive to God. So as I was but as a babe -in the way, I still wanted to be teached in the ways of God, and I fell -in company with John Bettens, to whom I opened my mind freely. I have -thought many times since I never found such faith, no, not in all the -men I ever talked with. Well, then, I was not confined to Trevean house -only, but I went aboute all through the country. But no place where I -was asked where the housen was not full of people, and sume would not -contain all the people. Shorley I was a wonder to myself, and in genral -I found great freedom to speak to the people in my simple way. I -remember once I went about eight or nine miles from home, and as I came -to the door where I was expected, a young man came out and said, "Are -you Captain Harry Carter?" I answered, "My name is Henry Carter." He -said, "We have been expecting of you, for it is given out for you to -preach to-night." When I heard of the name preach, I was struck with -such fear and trembling, I could not tel whether it was best to return -home again or stay there. So I went in, and the good man received me -very kindly, and when the time came took me to the chaple, where it was -so full the people could harley stand. Sume that know nothing of -preaching caled it preaching, but I never presumed to take a text, but -laid a little foundation as a text in disguise, so that I had room to -ramble. But it was not for what I could say only that the housen was so -full of people, but it was like the Jews of old, came not to see Jesus -only, but Lazreth[58] also. Where I was not known before, they heard of -me, and they believed that there was a great chainge upon me. I think -the people believed I was really what I professed to be, but many times -after I had been speaking, so dejected in my own mind, wishing that I -may stand up no more, for it was seldam a day passed but what I had -doubts whether I was cal'd or not, and I was much afraid to run before I -was sent. And likewayse the cross was so great, I have often[59] thought -if the people knew what I suffered, they never would ask me to exercise -in that way at all. Oh, how I did tremble and sweat just as the time -were come. Well, then, still the work of God continued to go on in -Trevean society, and lively meetings all through this neighberhood. - -I think it was in Febury, in 1791, or a little before, when the work in -Trevean begun in sume degree to sease, but still blessed times; and I -think it was in the later end of March or the begining of April I was -sent for by a great man of this neighberhood, he wanted to speak with -me. Accordingly I went, and the business was as follows--saying, "I was -in Helston a such a day in company with three jentelmen" (mentioned -their names); "they all ware black coats. Looking out through the -window, a methodist preacher went up street. One said, 'There is a -methodist prechar.' Another answerd, 'I wonder how Harry Carter goes -aboute so publick apreching and Law[60] against him; I wonder how he is -not aprended and taken.' So I sent for you, as I fear they are brewing -of mischief against you." "Well, sir," said I, "what do you think I am -best to do?" He said, "I know they cannot hurt you no further then if -you are taken you may suffer a long time in prison, and it may cost you -a good deal of money, etc. I think you are better, to prevent danger, to -return to America again." This was the tenar of his advice, and added, -"If you go there I will give you, as I _think_ he called it, a lett of -recomedation from Lord ----, which, I think, may be very usefull to you, -or anything else in my powar shall not be wanting." And as the jent was -well acquainted with our family, I dined with him, and he brought me -aboute a mile in my way home, so I parted with him, fully determning in -my own mind to soon see my dear friends in New York again. So I told my -brothers what the news was, and that I was meaning to take the jent's -advice. They answered, "If you go to America we never shall see you no -more. We are meaning to car on a little trade in Roscoff in the brandy -and gin way, and if you will go there you'l be as safe there as in -America; likewayse, we shall pay you for your comision, and you car on a -little business for your self, if you please." So that with prayer and -supplication I made my request known unto God. I still continued to walk -in the same rigrous self _denial as before_, abstaining _fro_m food, -etc. Well, then, with much fear and trembling I concluded to go. The -greatest tryal I had aboute going, I know there was no religious people -there, and sume times in fears I should be lead away into the world -again. I know I was going un slepry ground, but, glory be to God, I know -his grace was sufficient for me. So at the 19 of April, in '91, I saild -in an open boat from the King's Cove, in company with a merchant that -had business there, so that after fifteen hours' passage arived there -very safe, still in the same frame of mind. I lodged at a publick house, -I think, two days, and as the merchant had business to Morlaix, desired -me to go with him, where I staid there aboute ten or twelve days, and -returned again back to Roscoff. I keept myself to myself as much as -posable. Well, then, I went to privat lodgings and eate and drunk to -myself; and as I had no business to do, I was allmoste all the time to -myself day and night, still walking in the same _self deni_al as first. -I _would not_ allow myself but four hours in bed, so continued, as well -as I think, for six or seven days, but I found I had not sleep enough, -as aboute noon I have fallen asleep upon the book, so I added a little -longer time. I have often times since thought how dead I was then to all -below. There was a house burned under the same roof where I lodged -little before, and I had to go in and out right before the same house; -and after I was there aboute a furtnight I hard sume people talking -aboute the dredfull fire, and what great loste sume had sustained. I -asked, "What fire?" They said, "Next door." I made no other answer, for -I was really ashamed; what they thought of me I know not. So after I -looked, and saw moste of the walls standin, but without windows and -door, and the walls smoked quite black. - -Well, then, I did not pray in secret less than I did before, I suppose -never less than ten times in a day, and in fore and afternoon walked a -little out of town in so solitary place as I could find, out of sight of -all men. In genral I went on the cleavs,[61] wher no eye saw me, and -there sing, that I may be heard for I supose a mile distance, and pass, -I think, aboute two hours and half fore noon and after noon in reading, -praying, singing, and then return home. Aboute this time I made a linen -girdle to go aboute my loins inside my shirt. _Tied it_ tite--I thought -I might be able to live upon _less food_ and my sp_irit_ would be more -vigorous in the wayse of good. I continued on for, as I think, aboute -two days, found it quite disagrable, and so left it off. I passed -allmoste all my time to myself; in my going out and coming in I went the -byest roads, because I wanted to see no person; and if I meet any -person in the way, it was a great cross to me to enter in to any -conversation more than just the time of the day, for fear to obstroct my -communan with God. I think then I watched over all my thoughts as well -as words and acktens.[62] I think there did not the least thought pass -my mind unperseved; my mind then was like a fisherman's net, I sav'd the -good but heaved away the bad. - -Well, then, I went on still in this way until I think aboute the -beginning of August, when I went on with a little business in the shop -way, and aboute the same time Captain B. came there, an old acquaintance -of mine, being the first Captain I sailed with, a man of what we calls -good morels. I meet him one Sabbath morning as I was walking out, and -after a little conversation I said, "This is a poor place for the -publick worship of God; if I was at home now I should be at Trevean -preaching." He answered, "Why don't you stand up here and say something -to the people?" So as I thought he was making game of me, I answered, -"Who will hear me?" He said, "I will hear you, and I suppose most of the -English men in town." So the next Sabbath morning meet with him again on -nearly the same ground. He repeated unto me nearley the same thing -again, saying, "All the English in town will gladly hear you," or to -that purpose. So then I thought he was in earnest, and I left him with -much fear and trembling, and immediately went to ask counsel from the -mouth of the Lord, so that spent the remainder of that fore noon in pray -and supplication, and for fear I should run before I was sent, I set -this as a mark, that after diner I would go on the pier, and if I meet -first a such a man, who was master of one of the vessels that was there, -I should perpose the matter unto him, and if agreable, I should shorly -think it to be the will of God consarning me. So aboute one o'clock I -roase up from my knees and went on the pier, and the first man I meet -with was the very same man, so with much fear and trembling I opened the -business unto him of what Captain B. and I was talking of. He readily -replyed, "I'll come, and I will tell all the people of it, I suppose -they will all come." So him and me perposed the time of meeting, I think -it was four o'clock. So he, like a town cryar, beat the alarm, and after -I left him, oh, how my poor _head was_ destracted, a s_uch_ p_o_or -i_gnorant_ _sou_l as I was to take such a thing upon me; shorley I shall -be a by word and reproach with the French, and a mocking and lafing -stock to all the English. And another was, what can I say to the people? -as when I was at home there was mornars to comfart, weak belevers to -build up, sanctification to impress upon the people's minds, and now -only _sinners_, etc., to talk to. So that my poor mind was so full of -distraction I could harly tell what to do; but as I had gone so far as -to perpose it, I could not go from it. Well, then, according to the time -perposed, the same afternoon, in came Captain B. with I suppose about -twenty or thirty, I suppose nearly all the Inglish men in the town, took -off their hats, and seat themselves down, so that I begun to tremble -and sweat, I could scarcely hold the hymn book in both hands. Gave out -a verse, and begun to sing myself, and praise be to God, before I sung -the second verse I found life coming, and before I went to prayer the -cross was all gone, so that I found very great liberty in prayer; so -that when I roase from my knees I was surprised to see so many hard -harts to their knees, so that I found much curage to go on in my poor -simple way. I found uncoman degree of liberty, and the people all -listoned with the greatest attention, and after I dismised the people -with singing and prayer. So after they were gone, I was still jealous -that they would turn what I said into ridicule, and as I had a back -window that I could see the greatest part of the pier, watched them, and -they all went on board as quiat as Christians of the first magnitude -might be expected. The Lord doth only know if there was any good done or -not. So I continued for eight or nine months every night when there was -Englishmen there. I think it was in the beginning of the month of may -'92, when three of my brother's children come to life with me, Fra^{s.}, -Henry, and Joanna Carter, and staid with me until the beginning of -Sept^{r.}, when I was like a hermit to myself as before. I think it was -in the beginning of Oct^{r.} when three large cuttars, Captain Scott one -of them, came in here wind bound from Guarnsey; and as I went into the -house on sume buisiness where they put up to, saw one of their sailors -that did formely sail with me. I asked him to come to my house, sayin I -could treate him with a glass of grogg, and if them three or four men -that was presant would come with him, I should be glad to see them also. -That was in the evning. I was not home as I think more than fifteen or -twenty minits until he came in with four or five with him, and in a few -minits after allmoste the house full with their three Captains. Then I -thought what they come for, and as they took me in surprise, as I had -not the least thoughts to say anything, I begun to tremble and run -upstairs to call for help from the Lord. I suppose I might have been -there eight or ten minits, and as I was coming down I meet one in the -stairs, saying, "If you don't come down the people will all be gone." So -with much trembling and sweating I took the Hymn Book and begun to sing -to myself, as I did the first time. I found great liberty in prayer, and -after thundred out the tretnings, cryed aloude, spar'd not. They all -behaved very well, seemed to listen with great atention. So after we -concluded the meeting, I asked the Captains and sume of the men to seat -down, so they stayed with sume more of their people, I suppose more than -an hour, all very seryous, no laffing, no trifling conversation. They -took sume thing to drink, shook hands, and wished good night. Prayse be -to God, I was shorly a wonder to myself in deed. So the next morning him -that had sailed with me before come in laffing, saying one of his -shepmates told him that how could that ould man know his thoughts, for -he told him allmoste all that ever he did in his life. I think they -sailed the next day, and two of them being in company in a gale of -wind, one of them disapeared, and have never been heard of since. -Captain Scott showed me great kindness ever after; he sent a luggar -there after to be laid up, with, I think, six or eight men on board, who -ordered them to take all what they wanted of me, and likewayse -recemended all his friends unto me for what they wanted. - -Well, then, aboute the later end of Nov^{r.} I got a passage to come -home not only to see my family friends, but my spiritual friends also. I -can still see, glory be to God, I was still hungring and thirsting after -him. I thought before I come home, if I could be permitted to come into -preaching housen dors, I should be very happy, but praise be to God, I -had rather the right hand of felowship given me, the preaching houses -full of people where I was expected, as before. I staid at home until 24 -Dec^{r.}, and as the war seemed to be near at hand between the Franch -and Inglish, inbarked at Coverack, on board Captain R. John's. I had a -blessed time in company with my dear freinds there, two or three day -wind bound. Arived at Roscoff, Christmas day in the morning, 1 Jan^{y.} -1793, oh, how short I comes in all things of what I would wish or -ought[63] to have been. There was no talk of war when I arived there, -all was quiat as when I left the place. I found my house, etc., just as -I left it. I was then to myself as before, I went home like a hermat or -a king blessing and praising of God. I continued to walk in the same -self-denial. I sent off moste of my goods to Gurnsey, sold sume there, -and keept sume, what the law would alow me to bring home, as I was -promised that a vessel should be sent to bring me home. So I think -Feb^{y.} 2[64] there was an embargo lade on all English vessels, and war -declard between the boath Kingdoms. I think it was in the latter end of -March when I was sent to Morlaix as a prisnor, not close confined, but -to apear every morning to the town house to sine my name. I was there -nine or ten days, when I was ordered back to Roscoff again. Things at -that time looked very gloomey, but glory be to God, I was not the lease -afraid of all the lyons in France. I could trust boath soul and body in -the hands of my Redemer, no mormring, no complaining, the language of my -heart was continualy, "Good is the will of the Lord, may thy will be -done." I staid in Roscoff nine or ten days, when I was ordered again to -Morlaix in company with Mr. and Mrs. _McCullock_ and Mr. _Clansie_. I -think in the beginning of May was sent back again to Roscoff, Mr. M. and -Mr. C. in Roscoff the same time, where we was all obliged to go to the -town house every day to sine our names. So continued untel the beginning -of August, when we got a passport in order to come home. In the course -of this time, wilst in Morlaix, the same as at Roscoff, went to privat -lodgings. Walking still in the same rigrous selfdenial, etc. So as there -was no other way for us to come home, M. Macculloh bought a small -vessel, aboute 40 tons, and boute the seven or eight hauled the vessel -out in the Sadie Rock Road, and got all things on board ready for sea, -when there was orders from the town house with a corvet's armed boat, -ordered us in to the pier again. And this was Provedence indeed. Our -whole crew consist as follows: Mr. Macculloh was a jentleman marchant, -lived in that town many years before, a man of good property, etc.; Mrs. -Macculloh, two sons, one a man, the other aboute twelve years old, one -daughter, a young lady aboute eighteen or twenty years old, one sarvant -man, two sarvant maidens, Mr. Clansice, and myself, ten in number in -all. And we concluded before, that the old jentlman and me was all the -sailors, there was not one of the other eight that in no case could help -themselves. The four females was sent onshore to Mr. M.'s house, all the -rest of us keept on board with a gard of soldars for three days and -three nights, the wind blowing very hard tho' fair. This vessel was -condemed for sea for sume time before, so that in the cource of three -days we had time to overhaul her, and I think I may safely say that -there was scores of graving pieces in her not bigger then a man's hand; -sume of the timbrs so rotton, that one might pick them off with one's -fingers, the sails, masts, etc., in the like state. We had hard rain -sume part of that three days, where we was so wett below nearley as upon -deck. The old jentleman have told me many times since, saying it was -Providence prevented us from sailing, had we sailed then we should all -be no more. You may be ready to ask, Why did we expose ourselves to so -much dainger? I answer, "This was the third pasport, and all -conterdicted, and glad to git out of the mouths of the lyons, as there -was no other way." So we was all sent on shore to Mr. M.'s house with a -gard of soldars to be keept at the dore, and the 15 of August, 1793, all -march'd to St. Paul's with a gard of soldars. I lodged and boarded in -the house with Mr. and Mrs. M., where I had a good room and bed to sleep -in, and a large garden to walk in. Now, I am going to inform you of sume -of the devices of Satan. One evning, whilst at suppar, seating by the -side of Mr. M., when it was sugested to my mind the same as if _one_ was -to speak to my outward ear blasfamys thoughts against my dear friend Mr. -M. At first it struck me all of alarm. Upon reflection I was shore they -were not my thoughts, for at that time, and before then, I know I never -loved my own father bettar, and after, when the gulenteen[65] begun to -work, I have thought many a times, should him be condemned, I would -gladely die in his steed. So after suppar took a walk in the gardon as -usual, where I begun to reason, saying, "Shorley if I was saved from -inbred sin, I should not feel such ugley thoughts as these and then -begin to doubt." But praise be unto God, he did not leve me to doubt for -harley a moment, but sent me down the Comfartar, so that all doubts -vanished away in a moment. So I went to seat in the summar house, and -begun to sing, that I suppose that I might be heard all over the town. -I suppose I shall never forgett that evning wilst in time, how my poor -_sou_l was delighted in God my Savour. Still went on in the same rigrous -selfdenial, but I could not fast then for fear to be taken notice of -with the family. I staid there until the 12 or 13 September, 1793, when -sume officers came, sent by the town house; so after they examined us -for money and papars, took us to the Town House, and after they measured -our height, and asked us many foolish questions, took us to a prison -caled the "Retreat," in the same town. We arived there a little after -night, were all of us showed our apartment to lodge in. I had a nice -little room to myself like a king. Here was another chainge, but a happy -one, the language of my heart was, "Good is the will of the Lord, may -Thy will be done." Nor could I help singing that night alowd when I went -into bed. We all had our pervision sent from the House we lodged before, -and after four or five days past, we was joined by sevral French gent. -and lades, and in aboute fourteen or fifteen days there was two armed -horsemen sent in the preson to take Mr. and Mrs. M. from us, no person -knowing where they were to be sent, but supposed they were to be sent to -a small uninhabited island, a little off Brest harbar, and there to be -starved to death. Oh, what tears and cries was there with their little -famely and many others. It was seldom I could shed tears, th_en I_ did -plenty, and after dried up my tears and cheard myself up, and then went -in to his room, where I found him alone packing up his clothes, etc. I -sat myself down in silance I supose for aboute ten minutes without one -word; whether him or me spoak first, I know not, but he said in his -usual plesant way to this purpas, "I fear not what man can do unto me. I -can trust in Providence and not be afraid," which set my heart all on -fire with love; I could give them both up unto God, shorley beleving I -should see them again. The remainder of the day was a solam day unto me -in deed, but a day of mourning through the whole house; after this there -did seldam a day pass but what sume Jentmen and Ladis was brought to -join us, and in the beginning of Nov. 1793 the lady I boarded with and -sume of her famely was brought to us. I used sett times for reading, -praying, walking, and thinking, as I did before when I was at liberty, -and keept allmoste all the time to myself, I went to bed aboute ten or -half past, and got up as soon as I could see daylight in the morning; -and as the weather begun to alter, juste to run in the garden aboute -half hour in the fore noon, and the same in the after noon. At first the -people thought I was ither a natural fool or else mad, but my friend -Clansie gave them an account of what kind of being I was. Aboute this -time I had word brought me, that all my goods _I left_ in Roscoff was -condemed and sold, I suppose they might have been to the amount of L40. -I rejoiced with great joy when I heard of it, saying the Lord's will be -done, knowing all things should work twogether for good. It apears -clearley to me since that my will was wholy swallowed up in the will of -God; I think I was then shorley so dead to this world as ever I shall -be. Well, then, as the people begin to increase more and more evry day, -Mr. Clansice came with me in my little room. At first it was a great -cross to me, but soon after, the oftener I saw him the better, far -bettar I likt him, he ackted like a father, a brother, my tuter, my -sarvant. Glory be to God for such dear frends. He was a young jentelman -merchant, a man of great natural abilities, and I suppose brought up in -the first scools in Christendom. I knew his father and him from a child -before, but was little acquainted with him before we became prisonars -together, and I have thought many times since that there was not in the -whole world two such men as Mr. M. and he. About the 3 or 4 of Dec^{r.} -1793 a gard of soldars came into the prison and took with them my dear -friend C., Mr. T. Maccull, with a great number of French gintelemen and -ladis, so there was none of my family left, but Miss M. her dear little -brother, and the two sarvant maidens. I think such a scene as that I -never saw in all my life. I suppose there was not one dry face in all -the house, _either_ with men or whimin. There was not one _person_ that -know where they were to be sent to, but supposed they were all to be -sent upon the same Island with Mr. and Mrs. M., and there to be starved -to death. This was a day of mourning and lamentation indeed. I do not -know that I shed one tear, tho' it was a solamn day with me, still the -language of my heart was, "Good is the will of the Lord, may the Lord's -will be done." But the tryal was so great, the same as tearing the flesh -from the bones. - -Aboute the 6 Dec^{r.} 1793, when a gard of soldars came to the preson, -and took away I suppose between thirty and forty prisnors, and me one of -them, where to go we knew not; but Provedence enterfered, and worked -upon a French jintelman's mind, so that he took Miss Maccu^{h.} and her -little brother, with the two maidens, to his own house, so that they had -all liberty to walk the town when they pleased. This was the cause of -great joy and gladness unto me. There was a few horses brought for the -old and infarm to ride--two, which one was put in my hands, and ordered -to ride it, with a charge to keep it to myself. We had aboute twelve -French miles to go, so we arived to Morlaex just after night, where, to -my agreable surprise, found dear C., Mr. T. M., and sume jint^{n.} of -Roscow, whome I know before. We rejoiced greately together, and then -they g_ave_ an account of Mr. and Mrs. Maccu^{h.}; they was put _from_ -St. Paul's to a town caled Landernau, aboute twenty miles from S^{t.} -Paul's, in to a crimnal gaol, where the first night had nothing to lye -on but a little short dirty straw, and without one farding[66] of money -with them, and not one person in the town that they were acquainted -with, but in the morning was visited with sume jint^{n.} and lades, who -suplyed them with a bed, and brought them pervisian. So we rejoiced -greately together in telling and hearing. Here was a blessed chainge -again to me, to once more to be with my dear family at home again. This -place we was now in was a jentleman's house, all the family thrust out -and put into other prisons, and this house made a prison of. The house -was not large, but it was full of people below and aloft. I sleept in -one room, where there was fourteen beds, and there could not find the -least cornar to retire to myself but a little house. At that time it was -very cold, but I did not mind that. I could not stay there long to a -time, distorbed with one or other, as there was sixty or seventy -presoners there. I had not one farding of money, nor nither of our -family, but the law or rule was, by the order of the Convention, for the -rich to maintain the poor. So I think I was maintained by the publick -for two days, when my friend C. got credit for himself and me, from a -tavarn close by. What a great chainge this was again, all the day long -in nothing but a discord and noise. What a mercy it was I was not -d_raw_ed away by the multitude to do evil. I can see now at this moment -how I improved my time, how prechas every moment was, I had allwayse my -book in my pocket ready to hand if I could find any place to seat, and -sume times, when I could find no place to seat, stand to read. All the -people very civil to me, and in the beginning many of them introduced -their conversation; but I did not find it profatable, it sarved to block -the mind from prayer. Tho' I could understand and speak French on moste -common subjects, I soon gave them to think I know little or nothing, so -by that means I saved myself from a great deal of empty chatchat, so by -that means pass allmoste whole days, sume times without speaking very -little. I have often heard sume of the French gentlemen speaking very -high thing in my favour one to another, not knowing I could understand -them, and I think it had allwayse this efect to humble me as in to the -dust before God and before man. I was still watching over all my -thoughts with all my words and actions. I do realy now beleve that there -did not one thought pass through my mind unperseved in all my waking -moments, still living as under the immediate eye of God, walking in the -broad light of his countanance from moment to moment. I had left of -drinking of water from the year of '89 in America, but there was a well -close by the backdoor. I had _a_ tumblar glass where I went sume times, -and _filled a_ glass with water, and look at it again and again. Oh, how -my heart would burn with love and thankfulness to God. Aboute a week -after I was there, I had a book given me by a French gent that spoak -English, caled "The Sinner's Guide," pen'd by a Spanyard, but translated -in English. The name of the gen^{t.} that gave it me was Mr. Lereu, -which proved a great blessing to me indeed. - -25 Dec^{r.}, or Christmas day, 1793, Mr. T. M. and Mr. S. was taken from -us, and put to a town caled Carhay,[67] aboute thirty miles from -Morlaix, and there they joined Mr. and Mrs. Maccu^{h.}; all the rest of -us was moved to another Jen^{t.} house, a few dors off, where we had -more room, etc., Mr. C. and me still left together. The first thing I -allwayse lookt for first was a place to go in secret, and my friend C. -would allwayse look out for a place for himself and me to sleep in. I -found a nice _little_ place in the garat, with sume old mats and other -things I so inclosed, that it would just hold me to my knees, with my -feet out of sight, where I might stay so long as I pleased, and no -person distorb me. This was a blessed chainge again. I sleept in a room -with ten or twelve gent^{m.}, went to bed at ten o'clock, got up in the -morning at five, _spent an_ hour to myself, and at six went down stairs, -_and sat by_ the fire with the old men that garded _the house_. To read, -etc., until about half past seven or eight, when I should retire to my -little garat until nine, when I should come down, make my bed, and run -or walk in a large room until ten, and then retire again to my garat -until one o'clock, when I was caled to dinnar. After dinnar, aboute two, -I retired to my garat and stay there until half past three, come down -and run in the room until four, then retire, and stay there until aboute -seven or eight, stay down aboute half hour, and then pass in the garat -until ten, bed time. There was a small window in the garat aboute a foot -square, without glass, but a leef to shut and open, so that in the -daytime could see to read by it, but at night I seat without any light, -the days nearley the same length as they are in England. At that time I -begun to, what I call, to examen myself, which time was from half past -six until aboute nearley eight in the evning--about the same time that -the many thousands of methodists offered up their evning sacrifise in -England--and begin first to see the many wonderfull delivrances the Lord -had wrought for me--how I have been presarved so many times from -drowning and other dangars, then how I was convinced of sin, how I cal'd -for mercy, what tryals and temptations when I was seeking the Lord, how -and when I receved the Comfarter, what tryals, temptations, when I was -in a justified state, what [...], what fears, what joys and delights in -all plases I have [...] since I know the goodness of God; how many times -I prayed in secret in evry place, what self denial I walked in, and to -conclude, sume up the whole, saying, Lord, how is it with me now; am I -growing in grace or loosing of ground? This garat was very cold indeed -to the body, so that my hands was swollen very large with chilblins, -sitting so many hours in the cold without fire. - -Jan^{y.} 1794, aboute the beginning of the year, Mr. C. got me to sleep -with him in his little room and one French jen^{t.} This was again a -comfartable chainge; there we was together again, like to great k_ings_. -Aboute the latar end of this month, I was desired by C. to speak to -aboute twenty whemen caled nuns, being presnars in the same house. I -went with fear and trembling. They received me in a very _pleasant_ -manner, drew a chear,[68] asked me to seat down. _One of them, an_ old -Lady, the mother Confessor, asked _me, was_ I ever baptised. I answerd, -"Yes." "In what manner?" I answerd, "I was marked with the sign of the -Cross in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Gost." -I saw sume thing very plasant upon all their countnance, as it was the -same way they themselvs was baptised. They asked me a number of many -fullish questions, that I was obliged to mustar all the little French I -could rise, as I could understand and speak any thing aboute the coman -things of this life far better than the spiritual things, having no -person to converce with aboute spiritual things. However, they keept me -with them I suppose aboute half hour, still asking me questions, but at -laste asked me to kiss the Cross. I refused. They tried me again and -again. I told them I could not, I dare not do it. So at laste took my -leave of them, and so came off rejoicing like a king. They are a loving -people, and the nicest whemen I ever saw in France. I doubt not but many -of them lives according to the light that is given them. They petted me -very much, and told my friend afterward that if he could prevail upon me -to turn to their Religion, I should be a good man. They thought I was -earnestly crying for mercy, but was an entire strainger to the way of -mercy. They allwayse looked upon me afterward with the love of pity, -_and some_ of them was fond to converse with me, [...] found it -profitable, they after caled [...] the soletude, I spent so much time to -myself. I think it was the 11 or 12 of Feb^{y.} '94, I seat apart to -prayer and fasting on a particular occasion for thirty hours without -eating or drinking. At the 19 and 20 of the same month, I seat apart in -prayer and fasting to ask of the Lord sevral favours for self and -friends, with thanks for past mercys, forty-eight hours without eating -or drinkin. Oh, what a blessed time I had. The 19 and 20 of April, 1794, -I seat apart in prayer and fasting for forty-eight hours without eating -or drinking. I trust I shall ever remember these times wilst I am in -time. Oh, how my poor soul was delighted in God my Saviour. To the end -of this time I went to run in the room as usual, willing to know whether -I was weaker or not, so that I found I could run strong as ever I could; -and it was shorley to me _a great_ wonder, as I took no breakfast for -aboute six months _before_ then, and I took suppar sume times two, and -sume times _three times_ a week, and my suppar I supose did not exceed -two ounces of bread, without tea, water, or anything to drink, and my -dinnar very little. I was still suplied with dinnar from the tavern. Mr. -C., and aboute six or eight French gen^{t.}, dined together. I could not -keep all this a secret from my friend, so he took me to reason sevral -times, saying, "You'l destroy the body," and would intice me like a -child to eate, and allways took the pains to call me to dinnar. So _I -thought_ it was reason what he said, and I thought I was _going to_ too -great extremes, so I thought for the time to _come I would_ go without -breakfast and suppar as usual, _and fast_ for thirty hours once month, -for the time to come. I did not know then at that time I was thankfull -or humble, but even now, I know I was as less then nothing in the sight -of God and all men. I know I was unworthy of the floor I walked on, and -vilest of the vile in my own eyes. I never saw my short comings more -clearer than I did in them days. Oh, how often I was crying out against -my dryness and lasiness of soul, my littleness of love, etc. Sume times, -when I heard the clock strike, I uste to rejoice, saying, "Lord, one -hour nearer to Eternety," the same time mourn before God I did not spend -it more to his glory. I think every moment of time was far more preshas -then fine gold. Aboute this time there was numbers of gen^{t.} and lades -_taken_ away to Brest that I parsnally know, and their _heads_ chopt off -with the gulenteen[69] with a very little notice. I don't know I ever -had a doubt of my own life, but I have had many of Mr. M., and thought -many times, should he be condemed to die, I would gladly die in his -steed if Providence would have it. I knew he had much enimies, and why, -because he was a libral man and a man of powar, and did do much good, -and them he did do most good to was his greatest enimyes, and it was -_such men_ as him in genral sufferd moste. Ag_ain_ [...] if he was -spared, he was worth his _place in_ creation, be helpful to others as -well as his own famely. As for me, I thought I should never be found -wanting with any person in the world. I know my child at home would be -taken care of, so it was a mattar of very little defrance to me where -the body was left, knowing I had a house not made with hands, eternal in -the Heavens. I staid there until the 15 June, 1794, when the house was -cleared of all the presnors, and then put to a convent a little out of -Town, that was made a prison, caled the Calemaleets,[70] where there was -aboute 270 men and whimen, the house very full of people. We arived -there aboute nine in the morning, and as Mr. C. and me was shifting -aboute the house seeing for a place, standing in the _room_ talking -together, he was taken with a fit and fell _as_ dead in my arms. Soon -others came to my assistance, _and took_ him out in the yard as dead. It -was very seldem _that I_ shed tears, but then I did plentefully, as I -was in m_ind_ he was no more; but the language of my heart was _still_ -[...] _may_ thy will be done, come life or death, take life _and all_ -away, good is the will of the Lord. But praised _be the Lord for_ ever, -in the course of an hour he revived, and _was put to_ bed, so that in -the course of sume time after _he recovered_. In the garden I seat -myself under a tree and _thought of H_agar's words, "Thou, God, seest -me." I had a sweet time there until _I was disturbed_ by two young _men_ -that came to seat by _me_ [...] with a great m_errime_nt and ladies, and -_soon after_ the Lord provided a place for me under the stairs. It was a -large stone stairs going down to a under-ground seller. In the daytime I -could see a small glimring light, but never so light as to see to read. -This was a blessed place again, indeed, where I was out of sight and -hearing of all men. Mr. C. got part of a room in the garat, with a young -jen^{t.}, whose name was Morrow. The first night I made my bed in the -passage close by his door. Friend C. could not bear to see me there. -The next morning him, with sume young jen^{t.}, got carpentar's tools -and timber, turned to and divided the room in two, so took me in with -him again, and there we was again together like two great kings. We -could no longer have our food from the tavarn, the distance being too -far [...] The good lady that I lodged and boarded with in St. _Paul's_ -was brought to the same preson, and a young _gentleman_ with her, her -brother son, to which she _had_ d^{r.} C. and me with her to eate. She -had her per_vision_ sent from her own house. Blessed be God [...] for -such dear Friends. In the course of two _or three_ days I found my -strength much failed me. _I had_ more room to walk in than I had before, -_and_ long _stairs_ to go up and down over. Mr. C. _discovered_ it, and -took me again to reason, saying, "_You are_ of the earth, and the body -must be _helped with things_ of the earth; if you continue so, you'll -_hurt yourself_, and if you do not _feel_ any ill efects _now_ [...] -_you_ shorley will if _you_ lives untel you are old." I thought it was -quite reason that he preached to me. I thought I was going too far with -it, and that Satan had some hand in it; so after he watched me like a -child, and if I was not presant at the time of meals, he would come and -fetch me, and I must go with him, he would not be denied. Praise be to -God that I ever saw his face, he was allwayse more mindfull of me than -he was of himself; so I continued to take breakfast for eight or nine -days and then left it off again, and I unely staid without suppar twice -a week. This place was again a blessed chainge indeed. We had a large -garden to walk in, from six in the morning untel seven in the evning, I -suppose not less than three acres of ground, with fine gravel walks in -it and sume apple trees, etc., so I was like a bird left out of a cage. -I suppose I had not sung aloud to be heard with[71] man for many months -before. I _was_ allways surounded with[71] man, but then I _used to go_ -out with my book in my pocket, seat mys_elf under_ a tree, and if I -could not see any person, sing _so loud_, I suppose I might be heard for -a mile off. Oh, _how my_ soul would be delighted in the God of my -sa_lvation_. I remember one day, as I was seating under _a tree_, three -or four ladies came to me, and asked me _to sing. I begged_ to be -excused. They asked me again and again, so _as I was afraid_ to give an -ofence I sung two or three versis [...] _with_ a loud voice. They -thanked me in a very p_leasant manner_, and went away quite pleased. I -think I spent my time _to myself much_ the same as I did in Roscoff, -before _I was taken_ as a presonar. _I was_ allwayse mindfull of my -little cornar under the stears. I went to bed at ten o'clock, and got up -in the morning at four. All the people still full of friendship to me; -but I keept myself still to myself as much as posable, without giving an -ofence. There was there amongst the whole number aboute sixty nuns, one -of whom I conversed with more then all the rest; seldom miss a day, if -she saw me, but what she would have sume thing to say unto me. But I had -not French enough to enter into any depth of Religion, but I never heard -one sound of persuasion from her to turn to her Religion. Once I -remembered she asked me, saying, "Carter, did not you feel your self -very sorry when you was first convinced of sin?" or sume thing to the -same purpas. I was struck with wondar where she got that from. I think I -may safely say she was a burning and a shining light. She had small -suplys often from _her_ [...] _fat_her's house, and well she had it -often as it was _possible. It was al_wayse in her powar to govern her -own mind. _Every day_ she would give allmoste all she had to the poor, -_or to any_ person she thought that wanted; lived allmoste _entirely on_ -bread and water herself. She have often told friend _C._, "Do not leave -Carter want any thing, but speak _to me_." I have often thought that she -would allmoste _tear ou_t her eyes to do me good, and I have often -thought _that she ha_d not the least doubt but what I was built _for a -Catholi_ck. I have thought then, the same as I think _now, that if I_ am -faithfull untel death, and she cont_inued in the sa_me way, that she and -me, with many _more that_ I saw there, shall meet at God's right hand, -where we shall sing louder and sweeter that ever I sung in that gardon. -May the Lord grant it. She was so nice, butifull a young lady as I think -the sun could shine on; I suppose aboute 26 or 27 years old. Her father -was a nobleman of a large income, her mother, a sistar to the great, -rich Bishop of St. Paul's, and him, as I have heard, for all his incom, -could scarsely keep a goode sute of clothes aboute him--it was busy -all[72] for the poor. I think she was the pictar of humility in all her -deportment. I could not help to admire her, as I was in the same house, -or housas, for, as I think, nearly six months. - -Well, then, I continued to go on in the same manner as did before, -minding the same things, and using the same language as I did in every -chainge or place; this is the right place that God _would_ have me be -in, without one mormoring _thought_, or the leaste desire to be anywhere -else, _good_ is the will of the Lord, happy still from _moment_ to -moment. It was aboute the later end [...] it was imprest upon my mind to -make [...], as there was sume country men there tha_t was doing_ it, and -after, with prayer and suplication, _I made my_ request known unto God, -I begun to wo_rk. I went_ to bed still at ten, roase at three in the -m_orning, at_ four went to work until nine, pass a h_our in prayer -under_ the stairs, work until half past eleven, _and then dinner_; after -dinner pass a half hour u_nder the stairs_, and work untel four, pass a -half h_our again in prayer_, work until half past six; at seven _we had -supper_. The remainder of the evning spend in praying, walking, reading, -thinking, &c. So as the days shortend I could read but very little, -nither walk in the garden, but only on the Lord's day. But praise be -unto God, he was ever with me in a powarfull manner, sume times when the -walks was allmoste full of jent and lades, pass through them all, as if -allmoste there was no soul there but God and me only. That gardon was as -the gardon of Edon to my soul. Then, in the morning, I spent nearely -one hour to my self, and gitt at work as soon as I could see, minding -[...] the same stops under the stairs, and work as _long as_ I could see -in the evning. So as the weather _got_ coulder, I got myself to work in -a large _Room_, I suppose not less than 50 feet one way, and _I supos_e -aboute 30 the other; it was not finished, _neither p_lastard nor -floored; what was under foot was _the ground_, the top of the window -just to the level of _the roof_; and after suppar, evry evning, I passed -my _time there_ until bed time. I had a stool to seat un at _meals_, and -in the evnings seat on my stool, then _to_ pray, &c.; sume times, -without[73] it was _moonlight, stu_mble up again[74] the walls, as I had -_no light; but_ praise be to God for ever, for all it was so cold, a -solatry place, it was a paradice to my soul, it was sume thing like a -hermitage indeed. I was out of sight and hearing of all men and things. -So just aboute that the clock struck ten, my dear friend C. and me used -to meet just at the same time in our little, dark cornar of our lodging -room as cheerfull as two kings. I think it was in the medle of Dec^{r.} -1794, the good ladey and her brother's son was removed from us and put -to St. Paul's, into the prison that I was first put in. It was a day of -mourning and lamentation with her, indeed, to leave her two children -behind her, and it was a time of tryal to me likewayse, as she was -nearly so natural as a mother. But still the language of my heart was as -usual--good is the will of the Lord. She t_ook_ care to send us our -provisan from her _own_ house, so still dear C. and me was together -li_ke_ [...]. Aboute this time I had an account that Mr. and Mrs. -_Maccullock_ was labrated out of preson,[75] and they and all their -_family were_ then at Mr. Diott's, in Morlaix. It was a day of rejoicing -_to_ me, indeed, to think that the Lord was so graicous _to bring_ us so -near together again. And in the course _of a few_ weeks they had liberty -to come to see dear C. and _me in prison. We_ shorley had a happy -meeting together, as w_e had not seen_ each other for aboute fifteen -months, they receved _me as their_ own child, and I them as my father -and mother. _Praise God_ for so many dear friends. - -Aboute the 10 _Jan_^{y.} 1795, Mr. Diott _sent for_ me to come to dine -with him. I went with much fear and trembling, as it was ever a great -cross to me to be with my great superiers, and so in every place I moved -at a solam awe of the presance of God resting upon me with a fear to -ofend him. There I meet with Mr. and Mrs. M., with all their loving -famely, and through the tender mercy of God, after all our tryals and -sufferings, being separated to nearley sixteen months from each other, -escaped, through mercy, all the lyons in France, not one hair of our -heads diminished. We staid there until evning, when Mr. Diot said, "I -will in the course of a few days gitt you out of preson and you shall -boath come to live at my house." We thanked him, wished good night, and -arived at home with our gard aboute seven. So the 23 Jany. 1795, in the -morning, we was boath librated. I went to Mr. Diot's, Mr. C. went with -Mr. Morrow in the same town. Still pervision at that time _ver_y scarce -to be had, the inhabitants of the town had all their _provisions_ sarved -out every day according to their famely. _Without_ we had money we -should not be able to gett board _on any_ account. I was received _into -t_hat famely as a king, treated as if I had been a noble_man, and_ being -the laste strainger was placed at the head of _the table_, where I -begged to be excused again and again, but _could not_ prevail. But to -the end of six or seven days I shifted _to the other_ end, where I -thought I was more in my place. _I thought_ it then, as I have many -times since, a piece of _bread be_hind the kitchen door was more -suitable for me. _Praise be_ to God, here was a chainge again indeed. -_From_ a stable to a parlar, and from a parlar to a [...]. _I eat_ -mostimes my three meals, _the_n for fear to be not_iced, I always eat_ -sparingly. I think I can say I allwayse _rose up with a_ sharper apetite -then I had when I sat down. I lodged in a large house to myself next -dore to Mr. Diot's, where I had no person to desturb me day nor night. -This was a blessed chainge again, it was just the place I would wish to -be in. I was there aboute two or three weeks, when I saw sume things -wanting to be done aboute two vessels that was laid up before my door, -belonging to Mr. Diot. I spoak of it to Mr. Peter Diot, and went to -work, and when the season sarved, I washed the decks morning and -evening; and as I had a chest of carpentar's tools in the same room with -me, made boats' oars, ruddars, painted names in the starn of the small -boats, etc.; that I was mostly imployed all the week. But my wark not -hard, as I was my own master, and I did it all volentary. And on the -Sabbath day I went out of town evry morning and afternoon when the -weather was _fair_ in sume solatry place to read, pray, sing, and -_think_, as I did in other places. I think it was aboute _the_ midle of -March 1795, Mr. M. was taken sick with _fever_ and agas, and in the -beginning of May 1795 went _away_ with all his famely, leaving only the -two ma_idens and_ me behind him. It was the 10 or 12 of Ju_ne that_ I -went to S^{t.} Paul's and Roscoff to see my old f_riends, where_ I was -received like a king, and with[76] sum_e people_ I never had but very -little acquaintance _with. I had_ my time to my self as usual, only at -[...] meals. I found the same solatry place _as before_, where I was -brought to examine _myself_ whether I was growing in grace or _not_ -[...] so I had a bl_essed_ t_ime_. I returned back again to Morlaix -aboute the 26 or 27 June, 1795, like a jiant refreshed with new wine. -There I was received again with that loving family with the greatest -afection. Praise be unto God for so many dear friends. It was nearley -aboute this time I went with aboute a half a score men to put a boat of -Mr. Diot's in a large building that was before a tobacko manefactry in -the shade, and after I had got the boat to the place I wanted, I went -from the people to gett a cornar to myself to pray, and looking aboute I -saw a large scales and weights close by me. I thought as no person saw -me I would way myself, and all the weight my weight was 6 score and 15 -pound.[77] I was set to _won_der where all my weight was gone, as I did -for _many_ years before way 10 score, and when I came _home_ I tried un -a waistcoat that I had not worn for _several_ years before, and I found -it too big for me, _may_ be upon the round nine inches, and I never know -in all these years no not _one single day_ of sickness. I think it was -the 10 July, 1795, Capt^{n.} [...] _the_ Capt^{n.} of a frigat that was -taken, and Mr. Moress [...] _of_ the "Elazander" man-of-mar, came _to -Morlaix in_ order to gett a passage to England in a _vessel_, who dined -and supped at Mr. Diot's. _They_ made very free with me all _the same as -if I_ was their equal, and one day, by a friend, desired me to call at -their lodging, they wanted to speak with me. I went with fear and -trembling, and the business was as follows. They said, "Mr. C., we have -been talking about you, as you have been here so long a prisnor, wearing -your old clothes out, your time passing away, earning nothing. We think -you may go with us in safety. Put your clothes on board the evning -before we sail, gett on board in the night, you'l never be inquired -after, nither found wanting." I answerd to this purpas: "Jen^{t.}, I -thank you kindly, but first you'l give me leave to inform you I was -brought out of prison upon Mr. Diot's interest, tho' he never sined any -paper, nither gave his word that I should continue in the country. -Notwithstanding that, in these critical times, if I was to go without -his leave, he might be caled to an account for it after ward. If you -will be so good as to ask Mr. Diot, and with his leave, I will gladly go -with you." They commended me very much, and said _the_ first opertunity -they would ask him, and I should know of them again. In the course of -two or three days _I_ waited on them again. Mr. Morress said to me, -"_Well_, Mr. C., we have opend your case to Mr. Diot. Mrs. [...], him -long with you; he is a great fool to sto_p here_ so long as he have, I -wounder how he have _not gone_ long before now. But Mr. D. said you was -_best to_ stay a little longer," and added, "Mr. C., proveden_ce has_ -presarved and provided for you in a mer_ciful manner_, so I would advise -you to wait with p_atience, and you_ will be deliverd in God's due -time." I th_anked them and_ took my l_eave of_ them, wondring w_here -that_ should come from, for it was the _words of a spir_itual man. I -went in one of my solatry cornars and there sung, and blessed and -praised God. I can almoste feel at this moment how happy and thankfull I -was, so well and contented equaly to stay as to go; and if it was the -will of God, I should stay there all my lifetime, still, good is the -will of the Lord, may His will be done. - -So I continued to my work aboute the boats and vessels as before, -walking in the same self-denial, until the 6 or 7 of Augst, 1795, when, -unexpected, on Saturday received a letter from Mr. M----h to meet him -at St. Paul's next monday, that he had obtained a pasport for himself, -famely, and me to go to England, and Mr. Clansee was then at Brest, who -had then got a nutral ship to take us home. Well, then, _this_ was a -great as well as unexpected news, and many _times_ before then thought -that I should be very glad and thank_ful_ if I ever lived to see such -chainge. But it answered the same efect as every other change I passed -through, a fear I should meet with anything that should obstruct my -communan with the Lord, and this is my mening when you read of any case -before, when I said I went in fear and trembling. So that on Munday -morn_ing I set out_ for S^{t.} Paul's _in_ C^{o.} with Mrs. Diot and -her two little _children and t_wo sarvants riding in a coach, and me on -horseback, where we arrived at S^{t.} Paul's at ten in the morning, and -there joind Mr. and Mrs. M. and their loving famely. Staid there untel -Tuesday morning with my dear old friend and Mother, Madam Esel le -Pleary, and set out for Landernau in C^{o.} with the two maidens. We -arrived at Landernau aboute three in the after noon. Wensday morning -breakfast with my two old friends, Mr. and Mad^{m.} Elel Renard, and old -jen^{t.} and young lady, who was his daughter. We was many months -prisonars togither, but then all librated, and they in their own house. -Same morning took a boat, and at four in the afternoon arrived on board -the ship _in_ Brest harbar, where we met all the fam_ily_ together, the -same ten of us that was stop_ped to_gether through a merical of mercy in -d_eed, and_ not one hair of our heads diminished. _Praise be_ to God, -here was another chainge. This ship was form_erly an Engl_ish frigate, -then under Danish coulars, _and_ the Capt^{n.} an English man. The -_first night_ I sleept on the cabin flooar covered _with a_ great coat, -then got a hammack [...] amongst the sailors. And when more _people -came_ on board, I went between decks, being [...] more quiat. I supose -the whole numbar of pasengars was aboute fifty offesars in the army and -navy, where I never was in such hurry and noise yet, in all the course -of my life, nither to sea nor land. I was allwayse imploid in reading, -in cooking, tending my famely to the table, etc. And there was a black -boy, the sarvant to one of the officers, very ill moste of the time, and -no person to do the leaste thing for him but myself onely. I had a quiat -place between decks to lodge in and pray, so that no person desturbed -me. I used the same self-denial as before. I have been often led to -wonder many times since of the goodness of God, for all they _were_ such -wild, distracted, disapated souls, I never _had the_ least tryal from -one of them, nither one _of the_ ship's company during the whole time. I -could _always_ bring any dish of meat from the cook to the _cabin to_ -my famely, and no person set the least hand _on me; or_ if one of the -others did, they was ready allmoste _to kill_ one the other; and the -Captain would trust me _with the_ tea and shugar canestar, but not one -person _else_ on board. I have thought many times _since abou_te it, -more than at that time through [...] d favour with God and man. _We lay -in Brest_ Roade nine days _wind_ bound, and then _got a fair_ wind to -the Nor_thwa_rd and westward [...] etc., arived at Falmouth 22 August, -1795. Arived onshore aboute three o'clock in the afternoon with much -fear and trembling, where I meet with my dear little Bettsy, there -staying with her aunt, Mrs. Smythe, then between 8 and 9 years old. In -the evning went to prayer meeting in the great Chaple. I said sumething -to the people, but found but little liberty. I thought the cause might -have been after aboute three weeks exposed to so much noise and company, -and for want of composure of mind, and likewayse so long a time out of -the habit of exercising in that way. I have thought many times since, -if I was ever dead to the world and to myself, I was then in them days. -It matterd but little where my lott was cast, whether in prosperity or -adversity, whether sickness or health, take life or all my friends away, -I could trust boath soul and body, with every thing _that_ I had, in to -the hands of my great Creator with_out the_ leaste resarve. I have -thought many times since _in them_ days, tho' I did not know it then, -that I had no will, or rather, of my own, but my will w_as_ loste in the -will of God. It is now brought _into my_ remembrance as the ship lyed to -of _Falmouth_ harbar, there was not boats enuf to c_arry all the_ -pasangers and bagage at once, and I _waited to_ the laste with two more, -staid untel _another_ boat should come, the wind blowing _fresh from_ -the westward. The Captain grew v_ery impatient, looking_ out for a boat, -and at laste said, "_I shall not wait_ only a few minuts longer, and -ta_ke you with me_." One of these p_as_a_ngers was ma_king _such a_ -noise, allmoste ready to jump overboard, for fear to be card up Channel. -I said to him, "Have a little patience, we shall have a boat in a -little time now." He turned unto me in a very sulky manner, and said, -"Who is like you, you are allwayse at home, you don't care where you are -car'd." I smiled, said nothing, but rejoiced within, and said to myself, -"You are saying the truth." And I thought if it was the will of the Lord -that I should be car'd to Copenhagen, that good is the will of the Lord. -So in the course of a few minits after saw a boate coming, and so all -was well again. I have thought since them days, I mean, since the day -that my soul was sanctified, that there did harley one thought pass -through me unperseeved in all my waking moments when I was in company -talking aboute the things of the world, or the things of God, when in -private by myself, or acting of business, my _spirit_, as it were, was -in a continual blaze of inward prayer. Well, then, I staid that night at -Falmouth, the next morning went to Penryn with my dear little Bettsey in -my hand, to see Mr. M----h and his loving family, who was then at Mrs. -Scot. The next morning, on Sunday, took a horse and arived at Breage -Church town[78] aboute eleven o'clock, where I meet my dear brother -Frank, then in his way to Church. As I first took him in surprise, at -first I could harley make him sensable I was his brother, being nearley -two years without hearing whether I was dead or alife. But when he come -to himself as it were, we rejoiced together with exceeding great joy -indeed. We went to his house in Rinsey, and after dinner went to see -brother John.[79] We sent him word before I was coming. But he could -harley believe it, with the voice of, "How can these things be?" But -f_irst_ looking out with his glass saw me yet a long way off. Ran to -meet me, fell upon my neck, and said in language like this, "This is my -brother that was dead, but is alive again; he was loste, but is found." -We passed the afternoon with him, and in the evning went to Keneggy to -see brother Charles, wh_ere we_ meet with many tears of joy, _and -afterwards_ returned again to Rinsey in _the evening_, where we had all -our conversation _about_ Hevenly things, _which_ was a treat indeed, -_after being_ so long _silent_ on the subject. - - - - - WILLIAM BYLES AND SONS, PRINTERS, - 129 FLEET STREET, LONDON, - AND BRADFORD. - - -FOOTNOTES: - -[1] It is said that this name is derived from the fact that John Carter, -a brother of Harry Carter, and the most famous of the smugglers, lived -there. He was nicknamed the "King of Prussia," and the house in which he -lived is still known as the "King of Prussia's House." The origin of -this nickname is explained by a story that when they were all boys -together, they used to play at soldiers, and John would always claim to -be the King of Prussia. Clearly an echo of the fame of Frederick the -Great had reached these boys about the time of the Seven Years' War. - -[2] 17 Geo. III. c. 7. - -[3] See Lecky. _History of Eighteenth Century_, vol. iv. ch. xiv. - -[4] Carlyle. _French Revolution_, bk. iii. ch. iv. - -[5] Spelt "yest" in the manuscript throughout. - -[6] "Called." The spelling is the dialect pronunciation. - -[7] A small village about half a mile from Prussia Cove. - -[8] Spelt "fever" in the manuscript. The Cornish people do not -distinguish "v" and "w." - -[9] "Bal" is a mine, tin or copper. - -[10] This name is now lost. - -[11] ? Folkestone, see p. 80. - -[12] The sizes of all his vessels are given in old measurement. Before -1835 ships were measured by the following elaborate rule. Subtract -three-fifths of the greatest breadth from the length of the keel, -multiply this by the breadth, and the result by half of the breadth; -divide the result so obtained by 94, and the answer is the size of the -ship in tons (see 13 Geo. III. c. 26, Sec. 74). They are now measured by -the cubical contents. It is difficult to render these figures in modern -measurement, but this sloop was probably about the size which would be -now called 10 tons. - -[13] About 18 tons in modern measurement. - -[14] About 30 tons in modern measurement. - -[15] Spelt "oughten" in the manuscript. Daughter is still pronounced -"dafter" in West Cornwall. - -[16] Conscience. - -[17] "Felt," dialect pronunciation. - -[18] "Carried," dialect pronunciation. - -[19] About 60 tons in modern measurement. - -[20] The treaty between France and the Americans was made on February 6, -1778. - -[21] "Kept," dialect pronunciation. - -[22] The "King of Prussia." - -[23] Cf. note 12. - -[24] About 50 tons in modern measurement. - -[25] Newlyn, near Penzance. - -[26] The collector of the Customs, presumably at Penzance. - -[27] Spelt "feve" in the manuscript. Cf. note 8. - -[28] About 45 tons in modern measurement. - -[29] ? Cawsand near Plymouth. - -[30] Burtons, a small tackle of two pulleys to be fastened anywhere at -pleasure (Phillips' _Dictionary_, 1706). Now obsolete. - -[31] Near Cuddan Point. It was built about 1775 by Mr. John Stackhouse, -of Pendarves. - -[32] It is said that the doctor who attended him at this time was always -met on the road about a mile away by two men, who blindfolded him; and -in this way he was brought to the Castle, and so led back to the road -again. A precaution to prevent him from giving information as to Harry -Carter's hiding place. - -[33] Spelt "oughten" in the manuscript. See note 15. - -[34] Glazier. - -[35] Thomas Coke, LL.D.; he was ordained Bishop or Superintendent of the -American Methodist Societies by John Wesley in 1784. - -[36] This expression, which occurs several times in the following pages, -is common in West Cornwall in the sense of "although." - -[37] This is one of Dr. Watts' hymns. It was not included by John Wesley -in the Hymn-book which he published in 1790. - -[38] Francis Asbury. He was sent to America by John Wesley in 1771, and -was elected Joint Superintendent with Dr. Coke at the Conference held at -Baltimore in 1784. He was the only English preacher who remained in -America during the War of Independence. - -[39] This is one of the "Olney" hymns by Cowper and Newton. - -[40] Spelt "worps" in the manuscript, which is dialect pronunciation. -Cf. "sharps" for "shafts" (of a cart), and "vycicle" for "bycicle," -which are both common. - -[41] Spelt "feve" in the manuscript. Cf. note 8. - -[42] Spelt "youmping" in the manuscript. Cf. "yest" for "just," note -5. - -[43] ? "Bustle." - -[44] Ordinances. - -[45] "Carry"; dialect. - -[46] 'Bedstead.' 'Stead' would be pronounced 'steed' in West Cornish -dialect. - -[47] "Further"; dialect. - -[48] Spelt "laght" in the manuscript. Cf. note 8. - -[49] The ordinary word for "a valley" in West Cornwall. - -[50] A well; dialect pronunciation. - -[51] Old measurement. - -[52] _I.e._, in their reckoning as to the position of the vessel. - -[53] ? Folkestone (see p. 4). - -[54] On the Fal. - -[55] Near Prussia Cove. - -[56] Intending; dialect. - -[57] A small village about a mile from Prussia Cove. - -[58] Lazarus. - -[59] Spelt 'oughten' in the manuscript. See note 15. - -[60] Referring to the Government reward for his capture. - -[61] Cliffs; dialect. - -[62] Actions. - -[63] Spelt "oft" in the manuscript. See note 15. - -[64] War was declared on the 1st February, 1793. - -[65] Guillotine. - -[66] Farthing; dialect. - -[67] Carhaix. - -[68] "Chair"; dialect. - -[69] Guillotine. - -[70] ? Carmelites. - -[71] Meaning "by"; dialect. - -[72] A common expression in West Cornwall. It is a forcible way of -saying that his means were fully occupied. - -[73] Meaning "unless"; dialect. - -[74] Meaning "against"; dialect. - -[75] Robespierre was executed on 28th July, 1794. Soon after his death -the Convention decreed that "Prisoners and other persons under -accusation should have a right to demand some 'Writ of accusation' and -see clearly what they were accused of."--Carlyle: _French Revolution_, -Book vii. ch. i. This decree was followed by the release of great -numbers of "Suspect" and other prisoners. - -[76] Meaning "by"; dialect. - -[77] The Cornish people always measure weight in scores (20 lbs). The -stone (14 lbs) is unknown. - -[78] In West Cornwall every collection of houses is called a town. The -village in which the parish church stands is called "Church town." - -[79] He lived at Prussia Cove. - - - - - Transcriber's notes: - - The following is a list of changes made to the original. - The first line is the original line, the second the corrected one. - - "from this it is evident," says Dr, - "from this it is evident," says Dr. - - 19, 1829, The last thirty years of his life - 19, 1829. The last thirty years of his life - - may prizes, manned and commanded chiefly - many prizes, manned and commanded chiefly - - same part of the the town, went in company - same part of the town, went in company - - so happy in all my life as I was at that _time_, - so happy in all my life as I was at that _time_. - - in God my Saviour, To the end of this - in God my Saviour. To the end of this - - must go with him, he would not be denied, - must go with him, he would not be denied. - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Autobiography of a Cornish Smuggler, by -Harry Carter - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CORNISH SMUGGLER *** - -***** This file should be named 40008.txt or 40008.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/4/0/0/0/40008/ - -Produced by Chris Curnow, Paul Clark and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive) - - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions -will be renamed. - -Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no -one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation -(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without -permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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