diff options
| -rw-r--r-- | 43566-0.txt | 325 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | 43566-8.txt | 720 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | 43566-8.zip | bin | 14850 -> 0 bytes | |||
| -rw-r--r-- | 43566-h.zip | bin | 4118984 -> 0 bytes | |||
| -rw-r--r-- | 43566-h/43566-h.htm | 431 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | 43566.txt | 720 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | 43566.zip | bin | 14829 -> 0 bytes |
7 files changed, 330 insertions, 1866 deletions
diff --git a/43566-0.txt b/43566-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..20ad73a --- /dev/null +++ b/43566-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,325 @@ +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 43566 *** + +[Illustration: CHARLES LAMB.] + + + + + + +A DISSERTATION UPON ROAST PIG + +BY CHARLES LAMB + +_Illustrated by L. J. Bridgman_ + + + BOSTON + D. LOTHROP COMPANY + FRANKLIN AND HAWLEY STREETS + + + + COPYRIGHT, 1888 + BY + D. LOTHROP COMPANY. + + +PRESSWORK BY BERWICK & SMITH, BOSTON. + + +[Illustration: YE DELIGHTFUL PIG.] + + +[Illustration: BO-BO PLAYETH WITH FIRE.] + + + + +UPON ROAST PIG + + +Mankind, says a Chinese manuscript, which my friend M. was obliging enough +to read and explain to me, for the first seventy thousand ages ate their +meat raw, clawing or biting it from the living animal, just as they do in +Abyssinia to this day. This period is not obscurely hinted at by their +great Confucius in the second chapter of his Mundane Mutations, where +he designates a kind of golden age by the term Cho-fang, literally the +Cooks' holiday. The manuscript goes on to say, that the art of roasting, +or rather broiling (which I take to be the elder brother) was accidentally +discovered in the manner following: The swineherd, Ho-ti, having gone +out in the woods one morning, as his manner was, to collect masts for +his hogs, left his cottage in the care of his eldest son Bo-bo, a great +lubberly boy, who being fond of playing with fire, as younkers of his +age commonly are, let some sparks escape into a bundle of straw, which +kindling quickly, spread the conflagration over every part of their +poor mansion, till it was reduced to ashes. Together with the cottage, +(a sorry antediluvian makeshift of a building, you may think it), +what was of much more importance, a fine litter of new-farrowed pigs, +no less than nine in number, perished. China pigs had been esteemed a +luxury all over the East, from the remotest periods that we read of. +Bo-bo was in the utmost consternation, as you may think, not so much for +the sake of the tenement, which his father and he could easily build +up again with a few dry branches, and the labour of an hour or two, +at any time, as for the loss of the pigs. While he was thinking what +he should say to his father, and wringing his hands over the smoking +remnants of one of those untimely sufferers, an odour assailed his +nostrils, unlike any scent which he had before experienced. What could +it proceed from?--not from the burnt cottage--he had smelt that smell +before--indeed this was by no means the first accident of the kind which +had occured through the negligence of this unlucky young firebrand. +Much less did it resemble that of any known herb, weed, or flower. +A premonitory moistening at the same time overflowed his nether lip. +He knew not what to think. He next stooped down to feel the pig, if there +were any signs of life in it. He burnt his fingers, and to cool them +he applied them in his booby fashion to his mouth. Some of the crumbs +of the scorched skin had come away with his fingers, and for the first +time in his life (in the world's life indeed, for before him no man +had known it) he tasted--_crackling_! Again he felt and fumbled at the +pig. It did not burn him so much now, still he licked his finger from a +sort of habit. The truth at length broke into his slow understanding, +that it was the pig that smelt so, and the pig that tasted so delicious; +and surrendering himself up to the newborn pleasure, he fell to tearing +up whole handfuls of the scorched skin with the flesh next it, and +was cramming it down his throat in his beastly fashion, when his sire +entered amid the smoking rafters, armed with retributory cudgel, and +finding how affairs stood, began to rain blows upon the young rogue's +shoulders, as thick as hailstones, which Bo-bo heeded not any more than +if they had been flies. The tickling pleasure which he experienced in +his lower regions, had rendered him quite callous to any inconveniences +he might feel in those remote quarters. His father might lay on, but he +could not beat him from his pig, till he had fairly made an end of it, +when, becoming a little more sensible of his situation, something like +the following dialogue ensued: + +[Illustration: YE FIRST TASTE.] + +"You graceless whelp, what have you got there devouring? Is it not enough +that you have burnt me down three houses with your dog's tricks, and +be hanged to you, but you must be eating fire, and I know not what--what +have you got there, I say?" + +"O father, the pig, the pig! do come and taste how nice the burnt pig +eats." + +The ears of Ho-ti tingled with horror. He cursed his son, and he cursed +himself that ever he should beget a son that should eat burnt pig. + +Bo-bo, whose scent was wonderfully sharpened since morning, soon raked +out another pig, and fairly rending it asunder, thrust the lesser half +by main force into the fists of Ho-ti, still shouting out, "Eat, eat, +eat the burnt pig, father, only taste--O Lord,"--with such-like barbarous +ejaculations, cramming all the while as if he would choke. + +[Illustration: HO-TI BEATETH HIS SON.] + +Ho-ti trembled every joint while he grasped the abominable things +wavering whether he should not put his son to death for an unnatural +young monster, when the crackling scorching his fingers, as it had +done his son's, and applying the same remedy to them, he in his turn +tasted some of its flavour, which, make what sour mouths he would for +a pretence, proved not altogether displeasing to him. In conclusion +(for the manuscript here is a little tedious) both father and son fairly +sat down to the mess, and never left off till they had despatched all +that remained of the litter. + +Bo-bo was strictly enjoined not to let the secret escape, for the +neighbors would certainly have stoned them for a couple of abominable +wretches, who could think of improving upon the good meat which God had +sent them. Nevertheless, strange stories got about. It was observed that +Ho-ti's cottage was burnt down now more frequently than ever. Nothing +but fires from this time forward. Some would break out in broad day, +others in the night-time. As often as the sow farrowed, so sure was +the house of Ho-ti to be in a blaze; and Ho-ti himself, which was the +more remarkable, instead of chastising his son, seemed to grow more +indulgent to him than ever. At length they were watched, the terrible +mystery discovered, and father and son summoned to take their trial +at Pekin, than an inconsiderable assize town. Evidence was given, +the obnoxious food itself produced in court, and verdict about to be +pronounced, when the foreman of the jury begged that some of the burnt +pig, of which the culprits stood accused, might be handed into the box. +He handled it, and they all handled it, and burning their fingers, +as Bo-bo and his father had done before them, and nature prompting to +each of them the same remedy, against the face of all the facts, and +the clearest charge which judge had ever given,--to the surprise of the +whole court, townsfolk, strangers, reporters, and all present--without +leaving the box, or any manner of consultation whatever, they brought +in a simultaneous verdict of Not Guilty. + +[Illustration: YE FAMILY REJOICETH.] + +The judge, who was a shrewd fellow, winked at the manifest iniquity +of the decision; and, when the court was dismissed, went privily, and +bought up all the pigs that could be had for love or money. In a few days +his Lordship's town house was observed to be on fire. The thing took +wing, and now there was nothing to be seen but fires in every direction. +Fuel and pigs grew enormously dear all over the district. The insurance +offices one and all shut up shop. People built slighter and slighter +every day, until it was feared that the very science of architecture would +in no long time be lost to the world. Thus this custom of firing houses +continued, till in process of time, says my manuscript, a sage arose, +like our Locke, who made a discovery, that the flesh of swine, or indeed +of any other animal, might be cooked (_burnt_, as they call it) without +the necessity of consuming a whole house to dress it. Then first began +the rude form of a gridiron. Roasting by the string, or spit, came in a +century or two later, I forget in whose dynasty. By such slow degrees, +concludes the manuscript, do the most useful, and seemingly the most +obvious arts, make their way among mankind. + +[Illustration: YE MYSTERY IS SOLVED.] + +Without placing too implicit faith in the account above given, it must +be agreed, that if a worthy pretext for so dangerous an experiment as +setting houses on fire (especially in these days) could be assigned in +favour of any culinary object, that pretext and excuse might be found +in roast pig. + +Of all the delicacies in the whole _mundus edibilis_, I will maintain +it to be the most delicate--_princeps obsoniorum_. + +I speak not of your grown porkers--things between pig and pork--those +hobbydehoys--but a young and tender suckling--under a moon old--guiltless +as yet of the sty--with no original speck of the _amor immunditiæ_, the +hereditary failing of the first parent, yet manifest--his voice as yet +not broken, but something between a childish treble, and a grumble--the +mild forerunner, or _præludium_, of a grunt. + +_He must be roasted._ I am not ignorant that our ancestors ate them +seethed, or boiled--but what a sacrifice of the exterior tegument! + +[Illustration: YE JURY GIVETH ITS VERDICT.] + +There is no flavour comparable, I will contend, to that of the crisp, +tawny, well-watched, not over-roasted, _crackling_, as it is well +called--the very teeth are invited to their share of the pleasure at +this banquet in overcoming the coy, brittle resistance--with the adhesive +oleaginous--O call it not fat--but an indefiable sweetness growing up +to it--the tender blossoming of fat--fat cropped in the bud--taken in +the shoot--in the first innocence--the cream and quintessence of the +child-pig's yet pure food--the lean, no lean, but a kind of animal +manna--or, rather, fat and lean (if it must be so) so blended and running +into each other, that both together make but one ambrosian result, +or common substance. + +Behold him, while he is doing--it seemeth rather a refreshing warmth, +then a scorching heat, that he is so passive to. How equably he twirleth +round the string!--Now he is just done. To see the extreme sensibility +of that tender age, he hath wept out his pretty eyes--radiant +jellies--shooting stars-- + +See him in the dish, his second cradle, how meek he lieth!--wouldst +thou have had this innocent grow up to the grossness and indocility +which too often accompany maturer swinehood? Ten to one he would have +proved a glutton, a sloven, an obstinate, disagreeable animal--wallowing +in all manner of filthy conversation--from these sins he is happily +snatched away-- + + Ere sin could blight, or sorrow fade, + Death came with timely care-- + +his memory is odoriferous--no clown curseth, while his stomach half +rejecteth, the rank bacon--no coalheaver bolteth him in reeking +sausages--he hath a fair sepulchre in the grateful stomach of the +judicious epicure--and for such a tomb might be content to die. + +[Illustration: YE JUDGE SPECULATETH.] + +He is the best of sapors. Pineapple is great. She is indeed almost too +transcendent--a delight, if not sinful, yet so like to sinning, that +really a tender-conscienced person would do well to pause--too ravishing +for mortal taste, she woundeth and excoriateth the lips that approach +her--like lover's kisses, she biteth--she is a pleasure bordering on +pain from the fierceness and insanity of her relish--but she stoppeth +at the palate--she meddleth not with the appetite--and the coarsest +hunger might barter her consistently for a mutton chop. + +Pig--let me speak his praise--is no less provocative of the appetite, +than he is satisfactory to the criticalness of the censorious palate. +The strong man may batten on him, and the weakling refuseth not his +mild juices. + +Unlike to mankind's mixed characters, a bundle of virtues and vices, +inexplicably intertwisted, and not to be unravelled without hazard, he +is--good throughout. No part of him is better or worse than another. He +helpeth, as far as his little means extend, all around. He is the least +envious of banquets. He is all neighbors' fare. + +[Illustration: YE SAGE MAKETH A DISCOVERY.] + +I am one of those, who freely and ungrudgingly impart a share of the +good things of this life which fall to their lot (few as mine are in +this kind) to a friend. I protest I take as great an interest in my +friend's pleasures, his relishes, and proper satisfactions, as in mine +own. "Presents," I often say, "endear Absents." Hares, pheasants, +partridges, snipes, barn-door chickens (those "tame villatic fowl"), +capons, plovers, brawn, barrels of oysters, I dispense as freely as I +receive them. I love to taste them, as it were, upon the tongue of my +friend. But a stop must be put somewhere. One would not, like Lear, "give +everything." I make my stand upon pig. Methinks it is an ingratitude to +the Giver of all good flavours, to extra-domiciliate, or send out of the +house, slightingly (under pretext of friendship, or I know not what), +a blessing so particularly adapted, predestined, I may say, to my +individual palate--It argues an insensibility. + +[Illustration: YE PIG TWIRLETH.] + +I remember a touch of conscience in this kind at school. My good old +aunt, who never parted from me at the end of a holiday without stuffing +a sweetmeat, or some nice thing, into my pocket, had dismissed me one +evening with a smoking plum-cake, fresh from the oven. In my way to +school (it was over London Bridge) a gray-headed old beggar saluted me +(I have no doubt at this time of day that he was a counterfeit). I had +no pence to console him with, and in the vanity of self-denial, and the +very coxcombry of charity, schoolboy-like, I made him a present of--the +whole cake! I walked on a little, buoyed up, as one is on such occasions, +with a sweet soothing of self-satisfaction; but before I had got to the +end of the bridge, my better feelings returned, and I burst into tears, +thinking how ungrateful I had been to my good aunt, to go and give her +good gift away to a stranger, that I had never seen before, and who might +be a bad man for aught I knew; and then I thought of the pleasure my aunt +would be taking in thinking that I--I myself, and not another--would eat +her nice cake--and what should I say to her the next time I saw her--how +naughty I was to part with her pretty present--and the odour of that +spicy cake came back upon my recollection, and the pleasure and the +curiosity I had taken in seeing her make it, and her joy when she sent +it to the oven, and how disappointed she would feel that I had never had +a bit of it in my mouth at last--and I blamed my impertinent spirit of +almsgiving, and out-of-place hypocrisy of goodness, and above all I +wished never to see the face again of that insiduous, good-for-nothing, +old gray impostor. + +Our ancestors were nice in their method of sacrificing these tender +victims. We read of pigs whipt to death with something of a shock, as +we hear of any other obsolete custom. The age of discipline is gone by, +or it would be curious to inquire (in a philosophical light merely) +what effect this process might have towards intenerating and dulcifying +a substance, naturally so mild and dulcet as the flesh of young pigs. It +looks like refining a violet. Yet we should be cautious, while we condemn +the inhumanity, how we censure the wisdom of the practice. It might +impart a gusto-- + +[Illustration: YE AROMATIC PIG.] + +I remember an hypothesis, argued upon by the young students, when I was +at St. Omer's, and maintained with much learning and pleasantry on both +sides, "Whether, supposing that the flavor of a pig who obtained his +death by whipping (_per flagellationem extremam_) superadded a pleasure +upon the palate of a man more intense than any possible suffering we +can conceive in the animal, is man justified in using that method of +putting the animal to death?" I forget the decision. + +His sauce should be considered. Decidedly, a few bread crumbs, done up +with his liver and brains, and a dash of mild sage. But, banish, dear +Mrs. Cook, I beseech you, the whole onion tribe. Barbecue your whole hogs +to your palate, steep them in shalots, stuff them out with plantations +of the rank and guilty garlic; you cannot poison them, or make them +stronger than they are--but consider, he is a weakling--a flower. + + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's A Dissertation upon Roast Pig, by Charles Lamb + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 43566 *** diff --git a/43566-8.txt b/43566-8.txt deleted file mode 100644 index 23f0289..0000000 --- a/43566-8.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,720 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Dissertation upon Roast Pig, by Charles Lamb - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with -almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or -re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included -with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org/license - - -Title: A Dissertation upon Roast Pig - -Author: Charles Lamb - -Illustrator: L. J. Bridgman - -Release Date: August 26, 2013 [EBook #43566] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A DISSERTATION UPON ROAST PIG *** - - - - -Produced by David Garcia and the Online Distributed -Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was -produced from images generously made available by The -Internet Archive) - - - - - - -[Illustration: CHARLES LAMB.] - - - - - - -A DISSERTATION UPON ROAST PIG - -BY CHARLES LAMB - -_Illustrated by L. J. Bridgman_ - - - BOSTON - D. LOTHROP COMPANY - FRANKLIN AND HAWLEY STREETS - - - - COPYRIGHT, 1888 - BY - D. LOTHROP COMPANY. - - -PRESSWORK BY BERWICK & SMITH, BOSTON. - - -[Illustration: YE DELIGHTFUL PIG.] - - -[Illustration: BO-BO PLAYETH WITH FIRE.] - - - - -UPON ROAST PIG - - -Mankind, says a Chinese manuscript, which my friend M. was obliging enough -to read and explain to me, for the first seventy thousand ages ate their -meat raw, clawing or biting it from the living animal, just as they do in -Abyssinia to this day. This period is not obscurely hinted at by their -great Confucius in the second chapter of his Mundane Mutations, where -he designates a kind of golden age by the term Cho-fang, literally the -Cooks' holiday. The manuscript goes on to say, that the art of roasting, -or rather broiling (which I take to be the elder brother) was accidentally -discovered in the manner following: The swineherd, Ho-ti, having gone -out in the woods one morning, as his manner was, to collect masts for -his hogs, left his cottage in the care of his eldest son Bo-bo, a great -lubberly boy, who being fond of playing with fire, as younkers of his -age commonly are, let some sparks escape into a bundle of straw, which -kindling quickly, spread the conflagration over every part of their -poor mansion, till it was reduced to ashes. Together with the cottage, -(a sorry antediluvian makeshift of a building, you may think it), -what was of much more importance, a fine litter of new-farrowed pigs, -no less than nine in number, perished. China pigs had been esteemed a -luxury all over the East, from the remotest periods that we read of. -Bo-bo was in the utmost consternation, as you may think, not so much for -the sake of the tenement, which his father and he could easily build -up again with a few dry branches, and the labour of an hour or two, -at any time, as for the loss of the pigs. While he was thinking what -he should say to his father, and wringing his hands over the smoking -remnants of one of those untimely sufferers, an odour assailed his -nostrils, unlike any scent which he had before experienced. What could -it proceed from?--not from the burnt cottage--he had smelt that smell -before--indeed this was by no means the first accident of the kind which -had occured through the negligence of this unlucky young firebrand. -Much less did it resemble that of any known herb, weed, or flower. -A premonitory moistening at the same time overflowed his nether lip. -He knew not what to think. He next stooped down to feel the pig, if there -were any signs of life in it. He burnt his fingers, and to cool them -he applied them in his booby fashion to his mouth. Some of the crumbs -of the scorched skin had come away with his fingers, and for the first -time in his life (in the world's life indeed, for before him no man -had known it) he tasted--_crackling_! Again he felt and fumbled at the -pig. It did not burn him so much now, still he licked his finger from a -sort of habit. The truth at length broke into his slow understanding, -that it was the pig that smelt so, and the pig that tasted so delicious; -and surrendering himself up to the newborn pleasure, he fell to tearing -up whole handfuls of the scorched skin with the flesh next it, and -was cramming it down his throat in his beastly fashion, when his sire -entered amid the smoking rafters, armed with retributory cudgel, and -finding how affairs stood, began to rain blows upon the young rogue's -shoulders, as thick as hailstones, which Bo-bo heeded not any more than -if they had been flies. The tickling pleasure which he experienced in -his lower regions, had rendered him quite callous to any inconveniences -he might feel in those remote quarters. His father might lay on, but he -could not beat him from his pig, till he had fairly made an end of it, -when, becoming a little more sensible of his situation, something like -the following dialogue ensued: - -[Illustration: YE FIRST TASTE.] - -"You graceless whelp, what have you got there devouring? Is it not enough -that you have burnt me down three houses with your dog's tricks, and -be hanged to you, but you must be eating fire, and I know not what--what -have you got there, I say?" - -"O father, the pig, the pig! do come and taste how nice the burnt pig -eats." - -The ears of Ho-ti tingled with horror. He cursed his son, and he cursed -himself that ever he should beget a son that should eat burnt pig. - -Bo-bo, whose scent was wonderfully sharpened since morning, soon raked -out another pig, and fairly rending it asunder, thrust the lesser half -by main force into the fists of Ho-ti, still shouting out, "Eat, eat, -eat the burnt pig, father, only taste--O Lord,"--with such-like barbarous -ejaculations, cramming all the while as if he would choke. - -[Illustration: HO-TI BEATETH HIS SON.] - -Ho-ti trembled every joint while he grasped the abominable things -wavering whether he should not put his son to death for an unnatural -young monster, when the crackling scorching his fingers, as it had -done his son's, and applying the same remedy to them, he in his turn -tasted some of its flavour, which, make what sour mouths he would for -a pretence, proved not altogether displeasing to him. In conclusion -(for the manuscript here is a little tedious) both father and son fairly -sat down to the mess, and never left off till they had despatched all -that remained of the litter. - -Bo-bo was strictly enjoined not to let the secret escape, for the -neighbors would certainly have stoned them for a couple of abominable -wretches, who could think of improving upon the good meat which God had -sent them. Nevertheless, strange stories got about. It was observed that -Ho-ti's cottage was burnt down now more frequently than ever. Nothing -but fires from this time forward. Some would break out in broad day, -others in the night-time. As often as the sow farrowed, so sure was -the house of Ho-ti to be in a blaze; and Ho-ti himself, which was the -more remarkable, instead of chastising his son, seemed to grow more -indulgent to him than ever. At length they were watched, the terrible -mystery discovered, and father and son summoned to take their trial -at Pekin, than an inconsiderable assize town. Evidence was given, -the obnoxious food itself produced in court, and verdict about to be -pronounced, when the foreman of the jury begged that some of the burnt -pig, of which the culprits stood accused, might be handed into the box. -He handled it, and they all handled it, and burning their fingers, -as Bo-bo and his father had done before them, and nature prompting to -each of them the same remedy, against the face of all the facts, and -the clearest charge which judge had ever given,--to the surprise of the -whole court, townsfolk, strangers, reporters, and all present--without -leaving the box, or any manner of consultation whatever, they brought -in a simultaneous verdict of Not Guilty. - -[Illustration: YE FAMILY REJOICETH.] - -The judge, who was a shrewd fellow, winked at the manifest iniquity -of the decision; and, when the court was dismissed, went privily, and -bought up all the pigs that could be had for love or money. In a few days -his Lordship's town house was observed to be on fire. The thing took -wing, and now there was nothing to be seen but fires in every direction. -Fuel and pigs grew enormously dear all over the district. The insurance -offices one and all shut up shop. People built slighter and slighter -every day, until it was feared that the very science of architecture would -in no long time be lost to the world. Thus this custom of firing houses -continued, till in process of time, says my manuscript, a sage arose, -like our Locke, who made a discovery, that the flesh of swine, or indeed -of any other animal, might be cooked (_burnt_, as they call it) without -the necessity of consuming a whole house to dress it. Then first began -the rude form of a gridiron. Roasting by the string, or spit, came in a -century or two later, I forget in whose dynasty. By such slow degrees, -concludes the manuscript, do the most useful, and seemingly the most -obvious arts, make their way among mankind. - -[Illustration: YE MYSTERY IS SOLVED.] - -Without placing too implicit faith in the account above given, it must -be agreed, that if a worthy pretext for so dangerous an experiment as -setting houses on fire (especially in these days) could be assigned in -favour of any culinary object, that pretext and excuse might be found -in roast pig. - -Of all the delicacies in the whole _mundus edibilis_, I will maintain -it to be the most delicate--_princeps obsoniorum_. - -I speak not of your grown porkers--things between pig and pork--those -hobbydehoys--but a young and tender suckling--under a moon old--guiltless -as yet of the sty--with no original speck of the _amor immunditiæ_, the -hereditary failing of the first parent, yet manifest--his voice as yet -not broken, but something between a childish treble, and a grumble--the -mild forerunner, or _præludium_, of a grunt. - -_He must be roasted._ I am not ignorant that our ancestors ate them -seethed, or boiled--but what a sacrifice of the exterior tegument! - -[Illustration: YE JURY GIVETH ITS VERDICT.] - -There is no flavour comparable, I will contend, to that of the crisp, -tawny, well-watched, not over-roasted, _crackling_, as it is well -called--the very teeth are invited to their share of the pleasure at -this banquet in overcoming the coy, brittle resistance--with the adhesive -oleaginous--O call it not fat--but an indefiable sweetness growing up -to it--the tender blossoming of fat--fat cropped in the bud--taken in -the shoot--in the first innocence--the cream and quintessence of the -child-pig's yet pure food--the lean, no lean, but a kind of animal -manna--or, rather, fat and lean (if it must be so) so blended and running -into each other, that both together make but one ambrosian result, -or common substance. - -Behold him, while he is doing--it seemeth rather a refreshing warmth, -then a scorching heat, that he is so passive to. How equably he twirleth -round the string!--Now he is just done. To see the extreme sensibility -of that tender age, he hath wept out his pretty eyes--radiant -jellies--shooting stars-- - -See him in the dish, his second cradle, how meek he lieth!--wouldst -thou have had this innocent grow up to the grossness and indocility -which too often accompany maturer swinehood? Ten to one he would have -proved a glutton, a sloven, an obstinate, disagreeable animal--wallowing -in all manner of filthy conversation--from these sins he is happily -snatched away-- - - Ere sin could blight, or sorrow fade, - Death came with timely care-- - -his memory is odoriferous--no clown curseth, while his stomach half -rejecteth, the rank bacon--no coalheaver bolteth him in reeking -sausages--he hath a fair sepulchre in the grateful stomach of the -judicious epicure--and for such a tomb might be content to die. - -[Illustration: YE JUDGE SPECULATETH.] - -He is the best of sapors. Pineapple is great. She is indeed almost too -transcendent--a delight, if not sinful, yet so like to sinning, that -really a tender-conscienced person would do well to pause--too ravishing -for mortal taste, she woundeth and excoriateth the lips that approach -her--like lover's kisses, she biteth--she is a pleasure bordering on -pain from the fierceness and insanity of her relish--but she stoppeth -at the palate--she meddleth not with the appetite--and the coarsest -hunger might barter her consistently for a mutton chop. - -Pig--let me speak his praise--is no less provocative of the appetite, -than he is satisfactory to the criticalness of the censorious palate. -The strong man may batten on him, and the weakling refuseth not his -mild juices. - -Unlike to mankind's mixed characters, a bundle of virtues and vices, -inexplicably intertwisted, and not to be unravelled without hazard, he -is--good throughout. No part of him is better or worse than another. He -helpeth, as far as his little means extend, all around. He is the least -envious of banquets. He is all neighbors' fare. - -[Illustration: YE SAGE MAKETH A DISCOVERY.] - -I am one of those, who freely and ungrudgingly impart a share of the -good things of this life which fall to their lot (few as mine are in -this kind) to a friend. I protest I take as great an interest in my -friend's pleasures, his relishes, and proper satisfactions, as in mine -own. "Presents," I often say, "endear Absents." Hares, pheasants, -partridges, snipes, barn-door chickens (those "tame villatic fowl"), -capons, plovers, brawn, barrels of oysters, I dispense as freely as I -receive them. I love to taste them, as it were, upon the tongue of my -friend. But a stop must be put somewhere. One would not, like Lear, "give -everything." I make my stand upon pig. Methinks it is an ingratitude to -the Giver of all good flavours, to extra-domiciliate, or send out of the -house, slightingly (under pretext of friendship, or I know not what), -a blessing so particularly adapted, predestined, I may say, to my -individual palate--It argues an insensibility. - -[Illustration: YE PIG TWIRLETH.] - -I remember a touch of conscience in this kind at school. My good old -aunt, who never parted from me at the end of a holiday without stuffing -a sweetmeat, or some nice thing, into my pocket, had dismissed me one -evening with a smoking plum-cake, fresh from the oven. In my way to -school (it was over London Bridge) a gray-headed old beggar saluted me -(I have no doubt at this time of day that he was a counterfeit). I had -no pence to console him with, and in the vanity of self-denial, and the -very coxcombry of charity, schoolboy-like, I made him a present of--the -whole cake! I walked on a little, buoyed up, as one is on such occasions, -with a sweet soothing of self-satisfaction; but before I had got to the -end of the bridge, my better feelings returned, and I burst into tears, -thinking how ungrateful I had been to my good aunt, to go and give her -good gift away to a stranger, that I had never seen before, and who might -be a bad man for aught I knew; and then I thought of the pleasure my aunt -would be taking in thinking that I--I myself, and not another--would eat -her nice cake--and what should I say to her the next time I saw her--how -naughty I was to part with her pretty present--and the odour of that -spicy cake came back upon my recollection, and the pleasure and the -curiosity I had taken in seeing her make it, and her joy when she sent -it to the oven, and how disappointed she would feel that I had never had -a bit of it in my mouth at last--and I blamed my impertinent spirit of -almsgiving, and out-of-place hypocrisy of goodness, and above all I -wished never to see the face again of that insiduous, good-for-nothing, -old gray impostor. - -Our ancestors were nice in their method of sacrificing these tender -victims. We read of pigs whipt to death with something of a shock, as -we hear of any other obsolete custom. The age of discipline is gone by, -or it would be curious to inquire (in a philosophical light merely) -what effect this process might have towards intenerating and dulcifying -a substance, naturally so mild and dulcet as the flesh of young pigs. It -looks like refining a violet. Yet we should be cautious, while we condemn -the inhumanity, how we censure the wisdom of the practice. It might -impart a gusto-- - -[Illustration: YE AROMATIC PIG.] - -I remember an hypothesis, argued upon by the young students, when I was -at St. Omer's, and maintained with much learning and pleasantry on both -sides, "Whether, supposing that the flavor of a pig who obtained his -death by whipping (_per flagellationem extremam_) superadded a pleasure -upon the palate of a man more intense than any possible suffering we -can conceive in the animal, is man justified in using that method of -putting the animal to death?" I forget the decision. - -His sauce should be considered. Decidedly, a few bread crumbs, done up -with his liver and brains, and a dash of mild sage. But, banish, dear -Mrs. Cook, I beseech you, the whole onion tribe. Barbecue your whole hogs -to your palate, steep them in shalots, stuff them out with plantations -of the rank and guilty garlic; you cannot poison them, or make them -stronger than they are--but consider, he is a weakling--a flower. - - - - - - -End of Project Gutenberg's A Dissertation upon Roast Pig, by Charles Lamb - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A DISSERTATION UPON ROAST PIG *** - -***** This file should be named 43566-8.txt or 43566-8.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/4/3/5/6/43566/ - -Produced by David Garcia and the Online Distributed -Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was -produced from images generously made available by The -Internet Archive) - - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions -will be renamed. - -Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no -one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation -(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without -permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, -set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to -copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to -protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. Project -Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you -charge for the eBooks, unless you receive specific permission. If you -do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the -rules is very easy. You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose -such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and -research. They may be modified and printed and given away--you may do -practically ANYTHING with public domain eBooks. Redistribution is -subject to the trademark license, especially commercial -redistribution. - - - -*** START: FULL LICENSE *** - -THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE -PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK - -To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free -distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work -(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project -Gutenberg-tm License (available with this file or online at -http://gutenberg.org/license). - - -Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works - -1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to -and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property -(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all -the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy -all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your possession. -If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the -terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or -entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8. - -1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be -used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who -agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few -things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See -paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement -and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm electronic -works. See paragraph 1.E below. - -1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the Foundation" -or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual works in the -collection are in the public domain in the United States. If an -individual work is in the public domain in the United States and you are -located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from -copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative -works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg -are removed. Of course, we hope that you will support the Project -Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting free access to electronic works by -freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm works in compliance with the terms of -this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with -the work. You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by -keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project -Gutenberg-tm License when you share it without charge with others. - -1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern -what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are in -a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, check -the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement -before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or -creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project -Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no representations concerning -the copyright status of any work in any country outside the United -States. - -1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: - -1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate -access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear prominently -whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work on which the -phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the phrase "Project -Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed, -copied or distributed: - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with -almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or -re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included -with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org/license - -1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is derived -from the public domain (does not contain a notice indicating that it is -posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied -and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees -or charges. If you are redistributing or providing access to a work -with the phrase "Project Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the -work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 -through 1.E.7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the -Project Gutenberg-tm trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or -1.E.9. - -1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted -with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution -must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any additional -terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms will be linked -to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works posted with the -permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work. - -1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this -work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm. - -1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this -electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without -prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with -active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project -Gutenberg-tm License. - -1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, -compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any -word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access to or -distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format other than -"Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official version -posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site (www.gutenberg.org), -you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a -copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon -request, of the work in its original "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other -form. Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. - -1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, -performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works -unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing -access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works provided -that - -- You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from - the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method - you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is - owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he - has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the - Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments - must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you - prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax - returns. Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and - sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the - address specified in Section 4, "Information about donations to - the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation." - -- You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies - you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he - does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm - License. You must require such a user to return or - destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium - and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of - Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -- You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of any - money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the - electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days - of receipt of the work. - -- You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free - distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set -forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from -both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and Michael -Hart, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark. Contact the -Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. - -1.F. - -1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable -effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread -public domain works in creating the Project Gutenberg-tm -collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm electronic -works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain -"Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or -corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual -property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a -computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by -your equipment. - -1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right -of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project -Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all -liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal -fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT -LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE -PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE -TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE -LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR -INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH -DAMAGE. - -1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a -defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can -receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a -written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you -received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with -your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you with -the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a -refund. If you received the work electronically, the person or entity -providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to -receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If the second copy -is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further -opportunities to fix the problem. - -1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth -in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS' WITH NO OTHER -WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO -WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. - -1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied -warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of damages. -If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement violates the -law of the state applicable to this agreement, the agreement shall be -interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or limitation permitted by -the applicable state law. The invalidity or unenforceability of any -provision of this agreement shall not void the remaining provisions. - -1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the -trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone -providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in accordance -with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the production, -promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works, -harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, including legal fees, -that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following which you do -or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this or any Project Gutenberg-tm -work, (b) alteration, modification, or additions or deletions to any -Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any Defect you cause. - - -Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm - -Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of -electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of computers -including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It exists -because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations from -people in all walks of life. - -Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the -assistance they need, are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's -goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will -remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure -and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future generations. -To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation -and how your efforts and donations can help, see Sections 3 and 4 -and the Foundation web page at http://www.pglaf.org. - - -Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive -Foundation - -The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit -501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the -state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal -Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification -number is 64-6221541. Its 501(c)(3) letter is posted at -http://pglaf.org/fundraising. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent -permitted by U.S. federal laws and your state's laws. - -The Foundation's principal office is located at 4557 Melan Dr. S. -Fairbanks, AK, 99712., but its volunteers and employees are scattered -throughout numerous locations. Its business office is located at -809 North 1500 West, Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887, email -business@pglaf.org. Email contact links and up to date contact -information can be found at the Foundation's web site and official -page at http://pglaf.org - -For additional contact information: - Dr. Gregory B. Newby - Chief Executive and Director - gbnewby@pglaf.org - - -Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation - -Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide -spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of -increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be -freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest -array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations -($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt -status with the IRS. - -The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating -charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United -States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a -considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up -with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations -where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To -SEND DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any -particular state visit http://pglaf.org - -While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we -have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition -against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who -approach us with offers to donate. - -International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make -any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from -outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. - -Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation -methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other -ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. -To donate, please visit: http://pglaf.org/donate - - -Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic -works. - -Professor Michael S. Hart is the originator of the Project Gutenberg-tm -concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared -with anyone. For thirty years, he produced and distributed Project -Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support. - - -Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed -editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the U.S. -unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not necessarily -keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition. - - -Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search facility: - - http://www.gutenberg.org - -This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, -including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to -subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. diff --git a/43566-8.zip b/43566-8.zip Binary files differdeleted file mode 100644 index e50e5f4..0000000 --- a/43566-8.zip +++ /dev/null diff --git a/43566-h.zip b/43566-h.zip Binary files differdeleted file mode 100644 index f4dab2e..0000000 --- a/43566-h.zip +++ /dev/null diff --git a/43566-h/43566-h.htm b/43566-h/43566-h.htm index 79463f6..ef49b61 100644 --- a/43566-h/43566-h.htm +++ b/43566-h/43566-h.htm @@ -3,7 +3,7 @@ <html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" lang="en" xml:lang="en"> <head> <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" - content="text/html; charset=iso-8859-1" /> + content="text/html; charset=UTF-8" /> <meta content="pg2html (binary v0.21)" name="generator" /> <title>The Project Gutenberg eBook of A Dissertation upon Roast Pig, @@ -60,47 +60,7 @@ </head> <body> - - -<pre> - -The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Dissertation upon Roast Pig, by Charles Lamb - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with -almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or -re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included -with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org/license - - -Title: A Dissertation upon Roast Pig - -Author: Charles Lamb - -Illustrator: L. J. Bridgman - -Release Date: August 26, 2013 [EBook #43566] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A DISSERTATION UPON ROAST PIG *** - - - - -Produced by David Garcia and the Online Distributed -Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was -produced from images generously made available by The -Internet Archive) - - - - - - -</pre> - +<div>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 43566 ***</div> <div class="figure"> <img id="coverpage" src="images/cover.jpg" width="400" height="533" alt="Front Cover" /> @@ -352,10 +312,10 @@ it to be the most delicate—<i>princeps obsoniorum</i>. <p> I speak not of your grown porkers—things between pig and pork—those hobbydehoys—but a young and tender suckling—under a moon old—guiltless -as yet of the sty—with no original speck of the <i>amor immunditiæ</i>, the +as yet of the sty—with no original speck of the <i>amor immunditiæ</i>, the hereditary failing of the first parent, yet manifest—his voice as yet not broken, but something between a childish treble, and a grumble—the -mild forerunner, or <i>præludium</i>, of a grunt. +mild forerunner, or <i>præludium</i>, of a grunt. </p> <p> <i>He must be roasted.</i> I am not ignorant that our ancestors ate them @@ -547,388 +507,7 @@ of the rank and guilty garlic; you cannot poison them, or make them stronger than they are—but consider, he is a weakling—a flower. </p> - - - - - - - -<pre> - - - - - -End of Project Gutenberg's A Dissertation upon Roast Pig, by Charles Lamb - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A DISSERTATION UPON ROAST PIG *** - -***** This file should be named 43566-h.htm or 43566-h.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/4/3/5/6/43566/ - -Produced by David Garcia and the Online Distributed -Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was -produced from images generously made available by The -Internet Archive) - - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions -will be renamed. - -Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no -one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation -(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without -permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, -set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to -copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to -protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. Project -Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you -charge for the eBooks, unless you receive specific permission. If you -do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the -rules is very easy. You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose -such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and -research. They may be modified and printed and given away--you may do -practically ANYTHING with public domain eBooks. Redistribution is -subject to the trademark license, especially commercial -redistribution. - - - -*** START: FULL LICENSE *** - -THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE -PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK - -To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free -distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work -(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project -Gutenberg-tm License (available with this file or online at -http://gutenberg.org/license). - - -Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works - -1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to -and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property -(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all -the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy -all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your possession. -If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the -terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or -entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8. - -1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be -used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who -agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few -things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See -paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement -and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm electronic -works. See paragraph 1.E below. - -1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the Foundation" -or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual works in the -collection are in the public domain in the United States. If an -individual work is in the public domain in the United States and you are -located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from -copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative -works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg -are removed. Of course, we hope that you will support the Project -Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting free access to electronic works by -freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm works in compliance with the terms of -this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with -the work. You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by -keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project -Gutenberg-tm License when you share it without charge with others. - -1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern -what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are in -a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, check -the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement -before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or -creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project -Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no representations concerning -the copyright status of any work in any country outside the United -States. - -1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: - -1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate -access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear prominently -whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work on which the -phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the phrase "Project -Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed, -copied or distributed: - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with -almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or -re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included -with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org/license - -1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is derived -from the public domain (does not contain a notice indicating that it is -posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied -and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees -or charges. If you are redistributing or providing access to a work -with the phrase "Project Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the -work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 -through 1.E.7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the -Project Gutenberg-tm trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or -1.E.9. - -1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted -with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution -must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any additional -terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms will be linked -to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works posted with the -permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work. - -1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this -work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm. - -1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this -electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without -prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with -active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project -Gutenberg-tm License. - -1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, -compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any -word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access to or -distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format other than -"Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official version -posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site (www.gutenberg.org), -you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a -copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon -request, of the work in its original "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other -form. Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. - -1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, -performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works -unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing -access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works provided -that - -- You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from - the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method - you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is - owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he - has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the - Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments - must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you - prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax - returns. Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and - sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the - address specified in Section 4, "Information about donations to - the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation." - -- You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies - you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he - does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm - License. You must require such a user to return or - destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium - and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of - Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -- You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of any - money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the - electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days - of receipt of the work. - -- You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free - distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set -forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from -both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and Michael -Hart, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark. Contact the -Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. - -1.F. - -1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable -effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread -public domain works in creating the Project Gutenberg-tm -collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm electronic -works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain -"Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or -corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual -property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a -computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by -your equipment. - -1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right -of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project -Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all -liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal -fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT -LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE -PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE -TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE -LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR -INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH -DAMAGE. - -1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a -defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can -receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a -written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you -received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with -your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you with -the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a -refund. If you received the work electronically, the person or entity -providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to -receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If the second copy -is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further -opportunities to fix the problem. - -1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth -in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS' WITH NO OTHER -WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO -WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. - -1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied -warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of damages. -If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement violates the -law of the state applicable to this agreement, the agreement shall be -interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or limitation permitted by -the applicable state law. The invalidity or unenforceability of any -provision of this agreement shall not void the remaining provisions. - -1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the -trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone -providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in accordance -with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the production, -promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works, -harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, including legal fees, -that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following which you do -or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this or any Project Gutenberg-tm -work, (b) alteration, modification, or additions or deletions to any -Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any Defect you cause. - - -Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm - -Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of -electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of computers -including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It exists -because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations from -people in all walks of life. - -Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the -assistance they need, are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's -goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will -remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure -and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future generations. -To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation -and how your efforts and donations can help, see Sections 3 and 4 -and the Foundation web page at http://www.pglaf.org. - - -Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive -Foundation - -The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit -501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the -state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal -Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification -number is 64-6221541. Its 501(c)(3) letter is posted at -http://pglaf.org/fundraising. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent -permitted by U.S. federal laws and your state's laws. - -The Foundation's principal office is located at 4557 Melan Dr. S. -Fairbanks, AK, 99712., but its volunteers and employees are scattered -throughout numerous locations. Its business office is located at -809 North 1500 West, Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887, email -business@pglaf.org. Email contact links and up to date contact -information can be found at the Foundation's web site and official -page at http://pglaf.org - -For additional contact information: - Dr. Gregory B. Newby - Chief Executive and Director - gbnewby@pglaf.org - - -Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation - -Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide -spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of -increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be -freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest -array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations -($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt -status with the IRS. - -The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating -charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United -States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a -considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up -with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations -where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To -SEND DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any -particular state visit http://pglaf.org - -While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we -have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition -against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who -approach us with offers to donate. - -International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make -any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from -outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. - -Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation -methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other -ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. -To donate, please visit: http://pglaf.org/donate - - -Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic -works. - -Professor Michael S. Hart is the originator of the Project Gutenberg-tm -concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared -with anyone. For thirty years, he produced and distributed Project -Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support. - - -Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed -editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the U.S. -unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not necessarily -keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition. - - -Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search facility: - - http://www.gutenberg.org - -This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, -including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to -subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. - - -</pre> - +<div>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 43566 ***</div> </body> </html> diff --git a/43566.txt b/43566.txt deleted file mode 100644 index 41915d4..0000000 --- a/43566.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,720 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Dissertation upon Roast Pig, by Charles Lamb - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with -almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or -re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included -with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org/license - - -Title: A Dissertation upon Roast Pig - -Author: Charles Lamb - -Illustrator: L. J. Bridgman - -Release Date: August 26, 2013 [EBook #43566] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ASCII - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A DISSERTATION UPON ROAST PIG *** - - - - -Produced by David Garcia and the Online Distributed -Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was -produced from images generously made available by The -Internet Archive) - - - - - - -[Illustration: CHARLES LAMB.] - - - - - - -A DISSERTATION UPON ROAST PIG - -BY CHARLES LAMB - -_Illustrated by L. J. Bridgman_ - - - BOSTON - D. LOTHROP COMPANY - FRANKLIN AND HAWLEY STREETS - - - - COPYRIGHT, 1888 - BY - D. LOTHROP COMPANY. - - -PRESSWORK BY BERWICK & SMITH, BOSTON. - - -[Illustration: YE DELIGHTFUL PIG.] - - -[Illustration: BO-BO PLAYETH WITH FIRE.] - - - - -UPON ROAST PIG - - -Mankind, says a Chinese manuscript, which my friend M. was obliging enough -to read and explain to me, for the first seventy thousand ages ate their -meat raw, clawing or biting it from the living animal, just as they do in -Abyssinia to this day. This period is not obscurely hinted at by their -great Confucius in the second chapter of his Mundane Mutations, where -he designates a kind of golden age by the term Cho-fang, literally the -Cooks' holiday. The manuscript goes on to say, that the art of roasting, -or rather broiling (which I take to be the elder brother) was accidentally -discovered in the manner following: The swineherd, Ho-ti, having gone -out in the woods one morning, as his manner was, to collect masts for -his hogs, left his cottage in the care of his eldest son Bo-bo, a great -lubberly boy, who being fond of playing with fire, as younkers of his -age commonly are, let some sparks escape into a bundle of straw, which -kindling quickly, spread the conflagration over every part of their -poor mansion, till it was reduced to ashes. Together with the cottage, -(a sorry antediluvian makeshift of a building, you may think it), -what was of much more importance, a fine litter of new-farrowed pigs, -no less than nine in number, perished. China pigs had been esteemed a -luxury all over the East, from the remotest periods that we read of. -Bo-bo was in the utmost consternation, as you may think, not so much for -the sake of the tenement, which his father and he could easily build -up again with a few dry branches, and the labour of an hour or two, -at any time, as for the loss of the pigs. While he was thinking what -he should say to his father, and wringing his hands over the smoking -remnants of one of those untimely sufferers, an odour assailed his -nostrils, unlike any scent which he had before experienced. What could -it proceed from?--not from the burnt cottage--he had smelt that smell -before--indeed this was by no means the first accident of the kind which -had occured through the negligence of this unlucky young firebrand. -Much less did it resemble that of any known herb, weed, or flower. -A premonitory moistening at the same time overflowed his nether lip. -He knew not what to think. He next stooped down to feel the pig, if there -were any signs of life in it. He burnt his fingers, and to cool them -he applied them in his booby fashion to his mouth. Some of the crumbs -of the scorched skin had come away with his fingers, and for the first -time in his life (in the world's life indeed, for before him no man -had known it) he tasted--_crackling_! Again he felt and fumbled at the -pig. It did not burn him so much now, still he licked his finger from a -sort of habit. The truth at length broke into his slow understanding, -that it was the pig that smelt so, and the pig that tasted so delicious; -and surrendering himself up to the newborn pleasure, he fell to tearing -up whole handfuls of the scorched skin with the flesh next it, and -was cramming it down his throat in his beastly fashion, when his sire -entered amid the smoking rafters, armed with retributory cudgel, and -finding how affairs stood, began to rain blows upon the young rogue's -shoulders, as thick as hailstones, which Bo-bo heeded not any more than -if they had been flies. The tickling pleasure which he experienced in -his lower regions, had rendered him quite callous to any inconveniences -he might feel in those remote quarters. His father might lay on, but he -could not beat him from his pig, till he had fairly made an end of it, -when, becoming a little more sensible of his situation, something like -the following dialogue ensued: - -[Illustration: YE FIRST TASTE.] - -"You graceless whelp, what have you got there devouring? Is it not enough -that you have burnt me down three houses with your dog's tricks, and -be hanged to you, but you must be eating fire, and I know not what--what -have you got there, I say?" - -"O father, the pig, the pig! do come and taste how nice the burnt pig -eats." - -The ears of Ho-ti tingled with horror. He cursed his son, and he cursed -himself that ever he should beget a son that should eat burnt pig. - -Bo-bo, whose scent was wonderfully sharpened since morning, soon raked -out another pig, and fairly rending it asunder, thrust the lesser half -by main force into the fists of Ho-ti, still shouting out, "Eat, eat, -eat the burnt pig, father, only taste--O Lord,"--with such-like barbarous -ejaculations, cramming all the while as if he would choke. - -[Illustration: HO-TI BEATETH HIS SON.] - -Ho-ti trembled every joint while he grasped the abominable things -wavering whether he should not put his son to death for an unnatural -young monster, when the crackling scorching his fingers, as it had -done his son's, and applying the same remedy to them, he in his turn -tasted some of its flavour, which, make what sour mouths he would for -a pretence, proved not altogether displeasing to him. In conclusion -(for the manuscript here is a little tedious) both father and son fairly -sat down to the mess, and never left off till they had despatched all -that remained of the litter. - -Bo-bo was strictly enjoined not to let the secret escape, for the -neighbors would certainly have stoned them for a couple of abominable -wretches, who could think of improving upon the good meat which God had -sent them. Nevertheless, strange stories got about. It was observed that -Ho-ti's cottage was burnt down now more frequently than ever. Nothing -but fires from this time forward. Some would break out in broad day, -others in the night-time. As often as the sow farrowed, so sure was -the house of Ho-ti to be in a blaze; and Ho-ti himself, which was the -more remarkable, instead of chastising his son, seemed to grow more -indulgent to him than ever. At length they were watched, the terrible -mystery discovered, and father and son summoned to take their trial -at Pekin, than an inconsiderable assize town. Evidence was given, -the obnoxious food itself produced in court, and verdict about to be -pronounced, when the foreman of the jury begged that some of the burnt -pig, of which the culprits stood accused, might be handed into the box. -He handled it, and they all handled it, and burning their fingers, -as Bo-bo and his father had done before them, and nature prompting to -each of them the same remedy, against the face of all the facts, and -the clearest charge which judge had ever given,--to the surprise of the -whole court, townsfolk, strangers, reporters, and all present--without -leaving the box, or any manner of consultation whatever, they brought -in a simultaneous verdict of Not Guilty. - -[Illustration: YE FAMILY REJOICETH.] - -The judge, who was a shrewd fellow, winked at the manifest iniquity -of the decision; and, when the court was dismissed, went privily, and -bought up all the pigs that could be had for love or money. In a few days -his Lordship's town house was observed to be on fire. The thing took -wing, and now there was nothing to be seen but fires in every direction. -Fuel and pigs grew enormously dear all over the district. The insurance -offices one and all shut up shop. People built slighter and slighter -every day, until it was feared that the very science of architecture would -in no long time be lost to the world. Thus this custom of firing houses -continued, till in process of time, says my manuscript, a sage arose, -like our Locke, who made a discovery, that the flesh of swine, or indeed -of any other animal, might be cooked (_burnt_, as they call it) without -the necessity of consuming a whole house to dress it. Then first began -the rude form of a gridiron. Roasting by the string, or spit, came in a -century or two later, I forget in whose dynasty. By such slow degrees, -concludes the manuscript, do the most useful, and seemingly the most -obvious arts, make their way among mankind. - -[Illustration: YE MYSTERY IS SOLVED.] - -Without placing too implicit faith in the account above given, it must -be agreed, that if a worthy pretext for so dangerous an experiment as -setting houses on fire (especially in these days) could be assigned in -favour of any culinary object, that pretext and excuse might be found -in roast pig. - -Of all the delicacies in the whole _mundus edibilis_, I will maintain -it to be the most delicate--_princeps obsoniorum_. - -I speak not of your grown porkers--things between pig and pork--those -hobbydehoys--but a young and tender suckling--under a moon old--guiltless -as yet of the sty--with no original speck of the _amor immunditiae_, the -hereditary failing of the first parent, yet manifest--his voice as yet -not broken, but something between a childish treble, and a grumble--the -mild forerunner, or _praeludium_, of a grunt. - -_He must be roasted._ I am not ignorant that our ancestors ate them -seethed, or boiled--but what a sacrifice of the exterior tegument! - -[Illustration: YE JURY GIVETH ITS VERDICT.] - -There is no flavour comparable, I will contend, to that of the crisp, -tawny, well-watched, not over-roasted, _crackling_, as it is well -called--the very teeth are invited to their share of the pleasure at -this banquet in overcoming the coy, brittle resistance--with the adhesive -oleaginous--O call it not fat--but an indefiable sweetness growing up -to it--the tender blossoming of fat--fat cropped in the bud--taken in -the shoot--in the first innocence--the cream and quintessence of the -child-pig's yet pure food--the lean, no lean, but a kind of animal -manna--or, rather, fat and lean (if it must be so) so blended and running -into each other, that both together make but one ambrosian result, -or common substance. - -Behold him, while he is doing--it seemeth rather a refreshing warmth, -then a scorching heat, that he is so passive to. How equably he twirleth -round the string!--Now he is just done. To see the extreme sensibility -of that tender age, he hath wept out his pretty eyes--radiant -jellies--shooting stars-- - -See him in the dish, his second cradle, how meek he lieth!--wouldst -thou have had this innocent grow up to the grossness and indocility -which too often accompany maturer swinehood? Ten to one he would have -proved a glutton, a sloven, an obstinate, disagreeable animal--wallowing -in all manner of filthy conversation--from these sins he is happily -snatched away-- - - Ere sin could blight, or sorrow fade, - Death came with timely care-- - -his memory is odoriferous--no clown curseth, while his stomach half -rejecteth, the rank bacon--no coalheaver bolteth him in reeking -sausages--he hath a fair sepulchre in the grateful stomach of the -judicious epicure--and for such a tomb might be content to die. - -[Illustration: YE JUDGE SPECULATETH.] - -He is the best of sapors. Pineapple is great. She is indeed almost too -transcendent--a delight, if not sinful, yet so like to sinning, that -really a tender-conscienced person would do well to pause--too ravishing -for mortal taste, she woundeth and excoriateth the lips that approach -her--like lover's kisses, she biteth--she is a pleasure bordering on -pain from the fierceness and insanity of her relish--but she stoppeth -at the palate--she meddleth not with the appetite--and the coarsest -hunger might barter her consistently for a mutton chop. - -Pig--let me speak his praise--is no less provocative of the appetite, -than he is satisfactory to the criticalness of the censorious palate. -The strong man may batten on him, and the weakling refuseth not his -mild juices. - -Unlike to mankind's mixed characters, a bundle of virtues and vices, -inexplicably intertwisted, and not to be unravelled without hazard, he -is--good throughout. No part of him is better or worse than another. He -helpeth, as far as his little means extend, all around. He is the least -envious of banquets. He is all neighbors' fare. - -[Illustration: YE SAGE MAKETH A DISCOVERY.] - -I am one of those, who freely and ungrudgingly impart a share of the -good things of this life which fall to their lot (few as mine are in -this kind) to a friend. I protest I take as great an interest in my -friend's pleasures, his relishes, and proper satisfactions, as in mine -own. "Presents," I often say, "endear Absents." Hares, pheasants, -partridges, snipes, barn-door chickens (those "tame villatic fowl"), -capons, plovers, brawn, barrels of oysters, I dispense as freely as I -receive them. I love to taste them, as it were, upon the tongue of my -friend. But a stop must be put somewhere. One would not, like Lear, "give -everything." I make my stand upon pig. Methinks it is an ingratitude to -the Giver of all good flavours, to extra-domiciliate, or send out of the -house, slightingly (under pretext of friendship, or I know not what), -a blessing so particularly adapted, predestined, I may say, to my -individual palate--It argues an insensibility. - -[Illustration: YE PIG TWIRLETH.] - -I remember a touch of conscience in this kind at school. My good old -aunt, who never parted from me at the end of a holiday without stuffing -a sweetmeat, or some nice thing, into my pocket, had dismissed me one -evening with a smoking plum-cake, fresh from the oven. In my way to -school (it was over London Bridge) a gray-headed old beggar saluted me -(I have no doubt at this time of day that he was a counterfeit). I had -no pence to console him with, and in the vanity of self-denial, and the -very coxcombry of charity, schoolboy-like, I made him a present of--the -whole cake! I walked on a little, buoyed up, as one is on such occasions, -with a sweet soothing of self-satisfaction; but before I had got to the -end of the bridge, my better feelings returned, and I burst into tears, -thinking how ungrateful I had been to my good aunt, to go and give her -good gift away to a stranger, that I had never seen before, and who might -be a bad man for aught I knew; and then I thought of the pleasure my aunt -would be taking in thinking that I--I myself, and not another--would eat -her nice cake--and what should I say to her the next time I saw her--how -naughty I was to part with her pretty present--and the odour of that -spicy cake came back upon my recollection, and the pleasure and the -curiosity I had taken in seeing her make it, and her joy when she sent -it to the oven, and how disappointed she would feel that I had never had -a bit of it in my mouth at last--and I blamed my impertinent spirit of -almsgiving, and out-of-place hypocrisy of goodness, and above all I -wished never to see the face again of that insiduous, good-for-nothing, -old gray impostor. - -Our ancestors were nice in their method of sacrificing these tender -victims. We read of pigs whipt to death with something of a shock, as -we hear of any other obsolete custom. The age of discipline is gone by, -or it would be curious to inquire (in a philosophical light merely) -what effect this process might have towards intenerating and dulcifying -a substance, naturally so mild and dulcet as the flesh of young pigs. It -looks like refining a violet. Yet we should be cautious, while we condemn -the inhumanity, how we censure the wisdom of the practice. It might -impart a gusto-- - -[Illustration: YE AROMATIC PIG.] - -I remember an hypothesis, argued upon by the young students, when I was -at St. Omer's, and maintained with much learning and pleasantry on both -sides, "Whether, supposing that the flavor of a pig who obtained his -death by whipping (_per flagellationem extremam_) superadded a pleasure -upon the palate of a man more intense than any possible suffering we -can conceive in the animal, is man justified in using that method of -putting the animal to death?" I forget the decision. - -His sauce should be considered. Decidedly, a few bread crumbs, done up -with his liver and brains, and a dash of mild sage. But, banish, dear -Mrs. Cook, I beseech you, the whole onion tribe. Barbecue your whole hogs -to your palate, steep them in shalots, stuff them out with plantations -of the rank and guilty garlic; you cannot poison them, or make them -stronger than they are--but consider, he is a weakling--a flower. - - - - - - -End of Project Gutenberg's A Dissertation upon Roast Pig, by Charles Lamb - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A DISSERTATION UPON ROAST PIG *** - -***** This file should be named 43566.txt or 43566.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/4/3/5/6/43566/ - -Produced by David Garcia and the Online Distributed -Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was -produced from images generously made available by The -Internet Archive) - - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions -will be renamed. - -Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no -one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation -(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without -permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, -set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to -copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to -protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. Project -Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you -charge for the eBooks, unless you receive specific permission. If you -do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the -rules is very easy. You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose -such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and -research. They may be modified and printed and given away--you may do -practically ANYTHING with public domain eBooks. Redistribution is -subject to the trademark license, especially commercial -redistribution. - - - -*** START: FULL LICENSE *** - -THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE -PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK - -To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free -distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work -(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project -Gutenberg-tm License (available with this file or online at -http://gutenberg.org/license). - - -Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works - -1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to -and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property -(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all -the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy -all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your possession. -If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the -terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or -entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8. - -1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be -used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who -agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few -things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See -paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement -and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm electronic -works. See paragraph 1.E below. - -1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the Foundation" -or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual works in the -collection are in the public domain in the United States. If an -individual work is in the public domain in the United States and you are -located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from -copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative -works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg -are removed. Of course, we hope that you will support the Project -Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting free access to electronic works by -freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm works in compliance with the terms of -this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with -the work. You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by -keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project -Gutenberg-tm License when you share it without charge with others. - -1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern -what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are in -a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, check -the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement -before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or -creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project -Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no representations concerning -the copyright status of any work in any country outside the United -States. - -1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: - -1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate -access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear prominently -whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work on which the -phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the phrase "Project -Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed, -copied or distributed: - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with -almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or -re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included -with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org/license - -1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is derived -from the public domain (does not contain a notice indicating that it is -posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied -and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees -or charges. If you are redistributing or providing access to a work -with the phrase "Project Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the -work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 -through 1.E.7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the -Project Gutenberg-tm trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or -1.E.9. - -1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted -with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution -must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any additional -terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms will be linked -to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works posted with the -permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work. - -1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this -work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm. - -1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this -electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without -prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with -active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project -Gutenberg-tm License. - -1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, -compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any -word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access to or -distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format other than -"Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official version -posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site (www.gutenberg.org), -you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a -copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon -request, of the work in its original "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other -form. Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. - -1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, -performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works -unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing -access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works provided -that - -- You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from - the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method - you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is - owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he - has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the - Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments - must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you - prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax - returns. Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and - sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the - address specified in Section 4, "Information about donations to - the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation." - -- You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies - you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he - does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm - License. You must require such a user to return or - destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium - and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of - Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -- You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of any - money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the - electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days - of receipt of the work. - -- You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free - distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set -forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from -both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and Michael -Hart, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark. Contact the -Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. - -1.F. - -1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable -effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread -public domain works in creating the Project Gutenberg-tm -collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm electronic -works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain -"Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or -corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual -property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a -computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by -your equipment. - -1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right -of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project -Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all -liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal -fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT -LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE -PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE -TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE -LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR -INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH -DAMAGE. - -1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a -defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can -receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a -written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you -received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with -your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you with -the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a -refund. If you received the work electronically, the person or entity -providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to -receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If the second copy -is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further -opportunities to fix the problem. - -1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth -in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS' WITH NO OTHER -WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO -WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. - -1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied -warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of damages. -If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement violates the -law of the state applicable to this agreement, the agreement shall be -interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or limitation permitted by -the applicable state law. The invalidity or unenforceability of any -provision of this agreement shall not void the remaining provisions. - -1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the -trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone -providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in accordance -with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the production, -promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works, -harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, including legal fees, -that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following which you do -or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this or any Project Gutenberg-tm -work, (b) alteration, modification, or additions or deletions to any -Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any Defect you cause. - - -Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm - -Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of -electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of computers -including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It exists -because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations from -people in all walks of life. - -Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the -assistance they need, are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's -goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will -remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure -and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future generations. -To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation -and how your efforts and donations can help, see Sections 3 and 4 -and the Foundation web page at http://www.pglaf.org. - - -Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive -Foundation - -The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit -501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the -state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal -Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification -number is 64-6221541. Its 501(c)(3) letter is posted at -http://pglaf.org/fundraising. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent -permitted by U.S. federal laws and your state's laws. - -The Foundation's principal office is located at 4557 Melan Dr. S. -Fairbanks, AK, 99712., but its volunteers and employees are scattered -throughout numerous locations. Its business office is located at -809 North 1500 West, Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887, email -business@pglaf.org. Email contact links and up to date contact -information can be found at the Foundation's web site and official -page at http://pglaf.org - -For additional contact information: - Dr. Gregory B. Newby - Chief Executive and Director - gbnewby@pglaf.org - - -Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation - -Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide -spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of -increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be -freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest -array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations -($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt -status with the IRS. - -The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating -charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United -States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a -considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up -with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations -where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To -SEND DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any -particular state visit http://pglaf.org - -While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we -have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition -against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who -approach us with offers to donate. - -International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make -any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from -outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. - -Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation -methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other -ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. -To donate, please visit: http://pglaf.org/donate - - -Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic -works. - -Professor Michael S. Hart is the originator of the Project Gutenberg-tm -concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared -with anyone. For thirty years, he produced and distributed Project -Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support. - - -Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed -editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the U.S. -unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not necessarily -keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition. - - -Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search facility: - - http://www.gutenberg.org - -This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, -including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to -subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. diff --git a/43566.zip b/43566.zip Binary files differdeleted file mode 100644 index 1b1940a..0000000 --- a/43566.zip +++ /dev/null |