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+The Project Gutenberg Ebook King Candaules &c., by Jean de La Fontaine
+#19 in our series by Jean de La Fontaine (The Tales and Novels)
+
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+copyright laws for your country before downloading or redistributing
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+
+
+Title: The Tales and Novels, v19: King Candaules &c.
+
+Author: Jean de La Fontaine
+
+Release Date: March, 2004 [EBook #5293]
+[Yes, we are more than one year ahead of schedule]
+[This file was first posted on June 21, 2002]
+
+Edition: 10
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+
+
+
+
+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK TALES AND NOVELS OF FONTAINE, V19 ***
+
+
+
+This eBook was produced by David Widger
+
+
+
+[NOTE: There is a short list of bookmarks, or pointers, at the end of the
+file for those who may wish to sample the author's ideas before making an
+entire meal of them. D.W.]
+
+
+
+
+
+ THE TALES AND NOVELS
+ OF
+ J. DE LA FONTAINE
+
+
+
+ Volume 19.
+
+ Contains:
+ The Psalter
+ King Candaules and the Doctor of Laws
+
+
+
+ THE PSALTER
+
+
+ ONCE more permit me, nuns, and this the last;
+ I can't resist, whatever may have passed,
+ But must relate, what often I've been told;
+ Your tales of convent pranks are seldom cold;
+ They have a grace that no where else we find,
+ And, somehow, better seem to please designed.
+ Another then we'll have, which three will make:--
+ Three did I say?-'tis four, or I mistake;
+ Let's count them well:-The GARD'NER first, we'll name;
+ Then comes the ABBESS, whose declining frame
+ Required a youth, her malady to cure
+ A story thought, perhaps, not over pure;
+ And, as to SISTER JANE, who'd got a brat,
+ I cannot fancy we should alter that.
+ These are the whole, and four's a number round;
+ You'll probably remark, 'tis strange I've found
+ Such pleasure in detailing convent scenes:--
+ 'Tis not my whim, but TASTE, that thither leans:
+ And, if you'd kept your breviary in view,
+ 'Tis clear, you'd nothing had with this to do;
+ We know, howe'er, 'tis not your fondest care;
+ So, quickly to our hist'ry let's repair.
+
+ A CHARMING youth would frequent visits pay,
+ To nuns, whose convent near his dwelling lay;
+ And, 'mong the sisters, one his person saw,
+ Who, by her eyes, would fain attention draw;
+ Smiles she bestowed, and other complaisance,
+ But not a single step would he advance;
+ By old and young he greatly was admired;
+ Sighs burst around, but none his bosom fired.
+ Fair Isabella solely got his love,
+ A beauteous nun, and gentle as a dove,
+ Till then a novice in the flow'ry chain,
+ And envied doubly:--for her charms and swain.
+ Their soft amours were watched with eagle-eye:
+ No pleasure's free from care you may rely;
+ In life each comfort coupled is with ill,
+ And this to alter baffles all our skill.
+
+ THE sister nuns so vigilant had been,
+ One night when darkness overspread the scene;
+ And all was proper mysteries to hide,
+ Some words escaped her cell that doubts supplied,
+ And other matters too were heard around,
+ That in her breviary could not be found.
+ 'Tis her gallant! said they: he's clearly caught;
+ Alarm pervaded; swarms were quickly brought;
+ Rage seemed to triumph; sentinels were placed;
+ The abbess too must know they were disgraced.
+ Away they hastened to convey surprise,
+ And, thund'ring at her door, cried, madam rise,
+ For sister Isabella, in her cell,
+ Has got a man, which surely can't be well.
+
+ YOU will observe, the dame was not at prayer,
+ Nor yet absorbed in sleep, devoid of care,
+ But with her then, this abbess had in bed
+ Good parson John, by kindness thither led,
+ A neighb'ring rector, confessor, and friend;
+ She rose in haste the sisters to attend,
+ And, seeking for her veil, with sense confused,
+ The parson's breeches took for what she used,
+ Which, in the dark, resembled what was worn
+ By nuns for veils, and called (perhaps in scorn),
+ Among themselves, their PSALTER, to express
+ Familiarly, a common, awkward dress.
+
+ WITH this new ornament, by way of veil,
+ She sallied forth and heard the woeful tale.
+ Then, irritated, she exclaimed with ire
+ To see this wretched creature I desire,
+ The devil's daughter, from her bold career,
+ Who'll bring our convent to disgrace, I fear;
+ But God forbid, I say, and with his leave,
+ We'll all restore:--rebuke she shall receive.
+ A chapter we will call:--the sisters came,
+ And stood around to hear their pious dame.
+
+ FAIR Isabella now the abbess sent,
+ Who straight obeyed, and to her tears gave vent,
+ Which overspread those lily cheeks and eyes,
+ A roguish youth so lately held his prize.
+ What! said the abbess: pretty scandal here,
+ When in the house of God such things appear;
+ Ashamed to death you ought to be, no doubt,
+ Who brought you thither?--such we always scout.
+
+ NOW Isabella, (--sister you must lose,
+ Henceforth, that name to you we cannot use;
+ The honour is too great,) in such a case,
+ Pray are you sensible of your disgrace,
+ And what's the punishment you'll undergo?
+ Before to-morrow, this you'll fully know;
+ Our institution chastisement decrees;
+ Come speak, I say, we'll hear you if you please.
+
+ POOR Isabella, with her sight on ground,
+ Confused, till then had scarcely looked around,
+ Now raised her eyes, and luckily perceived
+ The breeches, which her fears in part relieved,
+ And that the sisters, by surprise unnerved,
+ As oft's the case, had never once observed.
+ She courage took, and to the abbess said,
+ There's something from the Psalter, on your head,
+ That awkwardly hangs down; pray, madam, try
+ To put it right, or 'twill be in your eye.
+
+ 'TWAS knee-strings, worn, at times, by priests and beaux,
+ For, more or less, all follow fashion's laws.
+ This veil, no doubt, had very much the air
+ Of those unmentionables parsons wear;
+ And this the nun, to frolicking inclined,
+ It seems had well impressed upon her mind.
+ What, cried the abbess, dares she still to sneer?
+ How great her insolence to laugh and jeer,
+ When sins so heavily upon her rest,
+ And ev'ry thing remains quite unconfessed.
+ Upon my word, she'd be a saint decreed;
+ My veil, young imp, your notice cannot need;
+ 'Tis better think, you little hellish crow,
+ What pains your soul must undergo below.
+
+ THE mother abbess sermonized and fired,
+ And seemed as if her tongue would ne'er be tired.
+ Again the culprit said, your Psalter, pray,
+ Good madam, haste to set the proper way;
+ On which the sisters looked, both young and old
+ THOSE 'gan to laugh, while THESE were heard to scold.
+
+ OUR preacher, quite ashamed of what she'd done,
+ Now lost her voice, and noticed not the nun;
+ The murmur buzzed around, too well expressed,
+ What thoughts the holy sisterhood possessed.
+ At length the abbess said:--we've now not time
+ To take the chapter's votes upon her crime;
+ 'Twould make it late; let each to bed return,
+ And, till to-morrow, we'll the case adjourn.
+ No chapter met, howe'er, when morrow came;
+ Another day arrived, and still the same;
+ The sages of the convent thought it best,
+ In fact, to let the mystick business rest.
+ Much noise, perhaps, would hurt religion's cause,
+ And, that considered, prudent 'twere to pause.
+ Base envy made them Isabella hate,
+ And dark suspicions to the abbess state.
+ In short, unable by their schemes to get
+ The morsel she'd so fortunately met,
+ Each nun exerted all her art to find,
+ What equally might satisfy the mind.
+ Old friends were willingly received again;
+ Her gallant our belle was suffered to retain;
+ The rector and the abbess had their will;
+ And, such their union, precepts to fulfill,
+ That if a nun had none to give her bliss,
+ To lend a friend was nothing thought amiss.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+ KING CANDAULES AND THE DOCTOR OF LAWS
+
+
+ IN life oft ills from self-imprudence spring;
+ As proof, Candaules' story we will bring;
+ In folly's scenes the king was truly great:
+ His vassal, Gyges, had from him a bait,
+ The like in gallantry was rarely known,
+ And want of prudence never more was shown.
+
+ MY friend, said he, you frequently have seen
+ The beauteous face and features of the queen;
+ But these are naught, believe me, to the rest,
+ Which solely can be viewed when quite undressed.
+ Some day I'll let you gratify your eyes;
+ Without her knowledge I'll means devise;
+ But on condition:--you'll remember well
+ What you behold, to no one you will tell,
+ In ev'ry step most cautiously proceed,
+ And not your mind with silly wishes feed;
+ No sort of pleasure surely I could take,
+ To see vain passion you her lover make.
+ You must propose, this charming form to view,
+ As if mere marble, though to nature true;
+ And I'm convinced you'll readily declare,
+ Beyond nor art can reach, nor thought prepare;
+ Just now I left her in the bath at ease:
+ A judge you are, and shall the moment seize;
+ Come, witness my felicity supreme;
+ You know her beauties are my constant theme.
+
+ AWAY they went, and Gyges much admired;
+ Still more than that: in truth his breast was fired;
+ For when she moved astonishment was great,
+ And ev'ry grace upon her seemed to wait.
+ Emotion to suppress howe'er he tried,
+ Since he had promised what he felt to hide;
+ To hold his tongue he wished, but that might raise
+ Suspicions of designs and mystick ways.
+ Exaggeration was the better part,
+ And from the subject he would never start,
+ But fully praised each beauty in detail,
+ Without appearing any thing to veil.
+ Gods! Gyges cried, how truly, king, you're blessed;
+ The skin how fair--how charming all the rest!
+
+ THIS am'rous conversation by the queen
+ Was never heard, or she'd enraged have been;
+ In ancient days of ignorance, we find,
+ The sex, to show resentment, much inclined;
+ In diff'rent light at present this appears,
+ And fulsome praises ne'er offend their ears.
+
+ OUR arch observer struggled with his sighs
+ Those feelings much increased, so fair the prize:
+ The prince, in doubt, conducted him away;
+ But in his heart a hundred arrows lay;
+ Each magick charm directed pointed darts;
+ To flee were useless: LOVE such pain imparts,
+ That nothing can at times obstruct its course;
+ So quick the flight: so truly great the force.
+
+ WHILE near the king, much caution Gyges showed;
+ But soon the belle perceived his bosom glowed;
+ She learned the cause:--her spouse the tale disclosed,
+ And laughed and jeered, as he the facts exposed:
+ A silly blockhead! not to know a queen
+ Could raillery not bear on such a scene.
+ But had it pleased her wishes, still 'twere right
+ (Such honour's dictates) to discover spite;
+ And this she truly did, while in her mind,
+ To be revenged she fully was inclined.
+
+ FOR once, good reader, I should wish thee wife;
+ Or otherwise, thou never can'st in life,
+ Conceive the lengths a woman oft will go,
+ Whose breast is filled with wrath and secret woe.
+ A mortal was allowed these charms to view,
+ Which others' eyes could never dare pursue.
+ Such treasures were for gods, or rather kings
+ The privilege of both are beauteous things.
+
+ THESE thoughts induced the queen revenge to seek;
+ Rage moved her breast, and shame possessed her cheek.
+ E'en Cupid, we are told, assistance gave;
+ What from his aim effectually can save?
+ Fair in person was Gyges to behold;
+ Excuses for her easy 'twere to mould;
+ To show her charms, what baseness could excel?
+ And on th' exposer all her hatred fell.
+ Besides, he was a husband, which is worse
+ With these each sin receives a double curse.
+ What more shall I detail?--the facts are plain:
+ Detested was the king:--beloved the swain;
+ All was accomplished, and the monarch placed
+ Among the heroes who with horns are graced;
+ No doubt a dignity not much desired,
+ Though in repute, and easily acquired.
+
+ SUCH merit had the prince's folly got,
+ 'In petto', Vulcan's brother was his lot;
+ The distance thence is little to the HAT:
+ The honour much the same of this or that.
+
+ SO far 'twas passing well, but, in the intrigue;
+ The cruel Parcae now appeared to league;
+ And soon the lovers, on possession bent,
+ To black Cocytus' shores the monarch sent;
+ Too much of certain potions forced to drink,
+ He quickly viewed the dreary, horrid brink;
+ While pleasing the objects Gyges' eyes beheld;
+ And in the palace presently he dwelled,
+ For, whether love or rage the widow fired,
+ Her throne and hand she gave, as was required.
+
+ T' EXTEND this tale was never my design;
+ Though known full well, I do not now repine;
+ The case so thoroughly my purpose served.
+ Ne'er from the narrative the object swerved;
+ And scarcely can I fancy, better light
+ The DOCTOR will afford to what I write.
+ The scenes that follow I from Rome have drawn;
+ Not Rome of old, ere manners had their dawn,
+ When customs were unpleasant and severe
+ The females, silly, and gallants in fear;
+ But Rome of modern days, delightful spot!
+ Where better tastes have into fashion got,
+ And pleasure solely occupies the mind
+ To rapture ev'ry bosom seems resigned.
+ A tempting journey truly it appears,
+ For youths from twenty on to thirty years.
+
+ NOT long ago, then, in the city dwelled,
+ A master, who in teaching law excelled;
+ In other matters he, howe'er, was thought
+ A man that jollity and laughter sought.
+ He criticised whatever passed around,
+ And oft, at others' cost, diversion found.
+
+ IT happened that our learned doctor had,
+ Among his many pupils (good and bad)
+ A Frenchman, less designed to study laws,
+ Than, in amours, perhaps, to gain applause.
+ One day, observing him with clouded mien,
+ My friend, said he, you surely have the spleen,
+ And, out of college, nothing seem to do;
+ No law books read:--some object I'd pursue;
+ A handsome Frenchman should his hours improve;
+ Seek soft intrigues, or as a lover move;
+ Talents you have, and gay coquettes are here
+ Not one, thank heav'n, but numbers oft appear.
+
+ THE, student answered, I am new at Rome,
+ And, save the belles who sell their beauteous bloom,
+ I can't perceive, gallants much business find,
+ Each house, like monasteries, is designed,
+ With double doors, and bolts, and matrons sour,
+ And husbands Argus-eyed, who'd you devour.
+ Where can I go to follow up your plan,
+ And hope, in spots like these, a flame to fan?
+ 'Twere not less difficult to reach the moon,
+ And with my teeth I'd bite it just as soon.
+
+ HA! HA! replied the doctor with delight,
+ The honour which you do us is not slight;
+ I pity men quite fresh and raw like you;
+ Our town, I see, you've hardly travelled through,
+ You fancy then, such wily snares are set,
+ 'Tis difficult intrigues in Rome to get.
+ I'd have you know, we've creatures who devise,
+ To horn their husbands under Argus' eyes.
+ 'Tis very common; only try around,
+ And soon you'll find, that sly amours abound.
+ Within the neighb'ring church go take your place,
+ And, to the dames who pass in search of grace,
+ Present your fingers dipt in water blessed:--
+ A sign for those who wish to be caressed.
+ In case the suppliant's air some lady please,
+ Who knows her trade, and how to act at ease,
+ She'll send a message, something to desire:
+ You'll soon be found, wherever you retire,
+ Though lodged so secretly, that God alone,
+ Till then, your place of residence had known.
+ An aged female will on you attend,
+ Who, used to this, will full assistance lend,
+ Arrange an interview with wily art;
+ No trouble take, you'll have an easy part;
+ No trouble did I say? why, that's too much;
+ Some things I would except, their pow'r is such;
+ And proper 'tis, my friend, that I should hint,
+ Attentions you at Rome should well imprint,
+ And be discrete; in France you favours boast:
+ Of ev'ry moment here you make the most;
+ The Romans to the greatest lengths proceed.
+
+ So best, the spark replied, I like the deed;
+ And, though no Gascon, I may boldly say;
+ Superior prowess always I display.
+ Perhaps 'twas otherwise, for ev'ry wight;
+ In this, to play the Gascon, thinks it right.
+
+ To all the doctor's words our youth adhered,
+ And presently within a church appeared,
+ Where daily came the choicest belles around,
+ And loves and graces in their train were found,
+ Or, if 'tis wished in modern phrase to speak,
+ Attention num'rous angels there would seek.
+ Beneath their veils were beauteous sparkling eyes;
+ The holy-water scarcely would suffice.
+
+ IN lucky spot the spark his station took,
+ And gave to each that passed a plaintive look;
+ To some he bowed; to others seemed to pray,
+ And holy water offered on their way.
+ One angel 'mong the rest the boon received,
+ With easy pleasing air, that much relieved;
+ On which the student to himself expressed,
+ A fond belief, with her he might be blessed.
+
+ WHEN home, an aged female to him came,
+ And soon a meeting place he heard her name.
+ To count particulars howe'er were vain
+ Their pranks were many, and their folly plain;
+ The belle was handsome; ev'ry bliss was sought,
+ And all their moments most delightful thought.
+
+ HE, to the doctor, ev'ry matter told
+ Discretion in a Frenchman would be cold;
+ 'Tis out of nature, and bespeaks the cit;
+ Smells strong of shop, and would not fashion fit.
+
+ THE learned teacher satisfaction showed,
+ That such success from his instructions flowed,
+ Laughed heartily at husbands, silly wights,
+ Who had not wit to guard connubial rights,
+ And from their lamb the wily wolf to keep:
+ A shepherd will o'erlook a hundred sheep,
+ While foolish man's unable to protect,
+ E'en one where most he'd wish to be correct.
+ Howe'er, this care he thought was somewhat hard,
+ But not a thing impossible to guard;
+ And if he had not got a hundred eyes,
+ Thank heav'n, his wife, though cunning to devise,
+ He could defy:--her thoughts so well he knew,
+ That these intrigues she never would pursue.
+
+ YOU'LL, ne'er believe, good reader, without shame,
+ The doctor's wife was she our annals name;
+ And what's still worse, so many things he asked,
+ Her look, air, form, and secret charms unmasked,
+ That ev'ry answer fully seemed to say,
+ 'Twas clearly she, who thus had gone astray.
+ One circumstance the lawyer led to doubt:
+ Some talents had the student pointed out,
+ Which she had never to her husband shown,
+ And this relief administered alone.
+ Thought he, those manners not to her belong,
+ But all the rest are indications strong,
+ And prove the case; yet she at home is dull;
+ While this appears to be a prattling trull,
+ And pleasing in her conversation too;
+ In other matters 'tis my wife we view,
+ Form, face, complexion, features, eyes, and hair,
+ The whole combined pronounces her the fair.
+
+ AT length, when to himself the sage had said
+ 'Tis she; and then, 'tis not;--his senses led
+ To make him in the first opinion rest,
+ You well may guess what rage was in his breast.
+ A second meeting you have fixed? cried he;
+ Yes, said the Frenchman, that was made with glee;
+ We found the first so pleasing to our mind,
+ That to another both were well inclined,
+ And thoroughly resolved more fun to seek.
+ That's right, replied the doctor, have your freak;
+ The lady howsoe'er I now could name.
+ The scholar answered, that to me's the same;
+ I care not what she's called, Nor who she be:
+ 'Tis quite enough that we so well agree.
+ By this time I'm convinced her loving spouse.
+ Possesses what an anchorite might rouse;
+ And if a failure any where be met,
+ At such a place to-morrow one may get,
+ What I shall hope, exactly at the hour,
+ To find resigned and fully in my pow'r:
+
+ IN bed I shall be instantly received,
+ And from anxiety be soon relieved.
+ The place of meeting is a room below,
+ Most nicely furnished, rich, but void of show.
+ At first I through a passage dark was led,
+ Where Sol's bright rays are ne'er allowed to spread;
+ But soon, by my conductress, I was brought,
+ 'Mid LOVE'S delights, where all with charms was frought.
+
+ ON this you may suppose the doctor's pain;
+ But presently he thought a point to gain,
+ And take the student's place by wily art,
+ Where, acting in disguise the lover's part,
+ His rib he might entangle in a net,
+ And vassalage bestow she'd ne'er forget.
+ Our learned man was clearly in the wrong;
+ 'Twere better far to sleep and hold his tongue;
+ Unless, with God's assistance, he could raise
+ A remedy that merited full praise.
+ Whenever wives have got a candidate,
+ To be admitted to the Cuckold's state,
+ If thence he get scot free 'tis luck indeed;
+ But once received, and ornaments decreed,
+ A blot the more will surely nothing add,
+ To one already in the garment clad.
+ The doctor otherwise however thought;
+ Yet still his reason no advantage brought;
+ Indeed he fancied, if he could forestall
+ The youth who now he might his master call;
+ The trick would to his wisdom credit do,
+ And show, superior wiles he could pursue.
+
+ AWAY the husband hastened to the place;
+ In full belief, that, hiding well his face,
+ And favoured by the darkness of the spot,
+ The silence marked, and myst'ry of the plot,
+ He, undiscovered, safely might be led,
+ Where such delicious fruits were ready spread.
+
+ MISFORTUNE, howsoe'er, would so direct
+ The aged female nothing to neglect,
+ Had with her got a lantern to conduct,
+ The light from which at will she could obstruct,
+ And, far more cunning than our learned sage,
+ Perceived at once with whom she had t'engage;
+ But, marking no surprise, she bade him wait,
+ While she, his coming, to her dame should state.
+ Said she, unless I tell her first you're here,
+ I dare not let you in her room appear.
+ Besides, you have not got the right attire;
+ Undressed, in truth, is what she would desire.
+ My lady, you must know, is gone to bed:--
+ Then, thrusting in a dressing room his head,
+ He there beheld the necessary fare,
+ Of night-cap, slippers, shirt, and combs for hair,
+ With perfumes too, in Rome the nicest known,
+ And fit for highest cardinals to own.
+ His clothes the learned doctor laid aside;
+ The aged female came his steps to guide;
+ Through passages she led him by the hand,
+ Where all was dark, and many turnings planned;
+ At once bewildered, and deprived of sight,
+ The lawyer tottered much for want of light.
+ At length she ope'd a door, and pushed the sage,
+ Where most unpleasantly he must engage,
+ Though doubtless ev'ry way his proper place:--
+ The school where he was used the LAWS to trace!
+ O'ercome with shame, confusion, and surprise,
+ He nearly fainted, vain 'twere to disguise.
+
+ THE circumstances ran throughout the town;
+ Each student then was waiting in his gown;
+ Enough, no doubt, his fortunes to destroy;
+ The laugh went round, and all was jest and joy.
+ What, is he mad? said they, or would he seek
+ Some lass, and with her wish to have a freak?
+ Still worse arrived:--his beauteous spouse complained;
+ A trial followed, and distractions reigned;
+ Her relatives supported well the cause,
+ And represented, that the MAN of LAWS,
+ Occasioned jars and matrimonial strife;
+ That he was mad, and she, a prudent wife,
+ The marriage was annulled, and she withdrew:
+ Retirement now the lady would pursue,
+ In Vavoureuse a prelate blessed the dame,
+ And, at Saint Croissant, she a nun became.
+
+
+
+
+ETEXT EDITOR'S BOOKMARKS:
+
+No pleasure's free from care you may rely
+
+
+
+
+
+*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK TALES AND NOVELS OF FONTAINE, V19 ***
+
+*********** This file should be named 5293.txt or 5293.zip ***********
+
+This eBook was produced by David Widger
+
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