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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #53579 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/53579)
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-The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Wisdom of Fools, by Margaret Deland
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
-other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
-the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
-to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
-
-Title: The Wisdom of Fools
-
-Author: Margaret Deland
-
-Release Date: November 23, 2016 [EBook #53579]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE WISDOM OF FOOLS ***
-
-
-
-
-Produced by MFR, John Campbell and the Online Distributed
-Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was
-produced from images generously made available by The
-Internet Archive)
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
- TRANSCRIBER'S NOTE
-
- Italic text is denoted by _underscores_.
-
- Text in Old English (blackletter) font is denoted by =equal signs=.
-
- Obvious typographical errors and punctuation errors have been
- corrected after careful comparison with other occurrences within
- the text and consultation of external sources.
-
- All misspellings in the text, and inconsistent or archaic usage,
- have been retained.
-
-
-
-
-=Books by Margaret Deland.=
-
-
- THE OLD GARDEN, AND OTHER VERSES.
- Enlarged Edition. 16mo, gilt top, $1.25.
-
- THE OLD GARDEN, AND OTHER VERSES.
- _Holiday Edition._ Illustrated in color by
- WALTER CRANE. Crown 8vo, $4.00.
-
- JOHN WARD, PREACHER. A Novel. 16mo,
- $1.25; paper, 50 cents.
-
- SIDNEY. A Novel. 16mo, $1.25; paper, 50 cts.
-
- THE STORY OF A CHILD. 16mo, $1.00.
-
- MR. TOMMY DOVE, AND OTHER STORIES. 16mo, $1.00.
-
- PHILIP AND HIS WIFE. A Novel. 16mo, $1.25.
-
- THE WISDOM OF FOOLS. Stories. 16mo, $1.25.
-
- HOUGHTON, MIFFLIN & CO.
- BOSTON AND NEW YORK.
-
-
-
-
-THE WISDOM OF FOOLS
-
-BY
-
-MARGARET DELAND
-
-[Illustration: (Publisher colophon.)]
-
-BOSTON AND NEW YORK HOUGHTON, MIFFLIN AND COMPANY MDCCCXCVII
-
-
-
-
- COPYRIGHT, 1897,
- BY MARGARET DELAND
- ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
-
-
-
-
-CONTENTS
-
-
- PAGE
-
- WHERE IGNORANCE IS BLISS, ’TIS FOLLY TO BE WISE 3
-
- THE HOUSE OF RIMMON 66
-
- COUNTING THE COST 136
-
- THE LAW, OR THE GOSPEL? 191
-
-
-
-
-THE WISDOM OF FOOLS
-
-
-
-
-WHERE IGNORANCE IS BLISS ’TIS FOLLY TO BE WISE
-
-
-I
-
-“THE most delightful thing about our engagement is
-that everybody is so pleased with it.” Amy Townsend said this,
-smiling down at her lover, who, full length on the grass beside
-her, leaned on his elbow, watching her soft hair blowing across her
-forehead, and the color of the sun flickering through the shadows,
-hot on her cheek; for she had closed her fluffy white parasol and
-taken off her hat here under an oak-tree on the grassy bank of the
-river.
-
-“I should have thought that the fact that we were pleased ourselves
-was a trifle more important,” he suggested. But Miss Townsend paid
-no attention to his interruption.
-
-“You know, generally, when people get engaged, there are always
-people who exclaim: either the man is too good for the girl (and
-you are too good for me, Billy!), or the girl is too good for the
-man”--
-
-“She is; there is no question about that,” the man interrupted.
-
-“Be quiet!” the other commanded. “But in our case, everybody
-approves. You see, in the first place, you are a Parson, and I’m a
-Worker. That’s what they call me,--the old ladies,--‘a Worker.’ And
-of course that’s a most appropriate combination to start with.”
-
-“Well, the old ladies will discover that my wife isn’t going to
-run their committees for them,” the parson said emphatically.
-“Besides, if I’m a Parson, you’re a Person! How do the old ladies
-bear it, that I haven’t any ancestors, and used to run errands in a
-tin-shop? _I_’m a Worker, literally enough.”
-
-“You are a goose!” she told him calmly. “Don’t keep interrupting
-me, Billy. What do ancestors amount to? I admit I’m glad that none
-of mine were hanged (so far as I know), or that they didn’t run off
-with other people’s money--or wives. (I’d mind the wives less than
-the money, I must confess. I suppose you think that’s very mediæval
-in me?) But what credit is their good behavior to me? You are a
-credit to your people, whoever they were; and my own belief is that
-they were Princes!”
-
-She had such a charming way of flinging up her head and looking
-down at him sidewise, that he was willing to have had any kind of
-ancestors, only to catch that look of joyous pride; and in his own
-joyousness he was impelled to try to take her hand in his: but her
-fingers were laced about her knee, and she shook her head.
-
-“Stop! I’m talking seriously; you mustn’t be silly. You must
-listen to the other reasons why we are approved of: First, you
-are a Parson, and I’m a Worker. Secondly, you are forty-two,
-and ‘it’s high time’--high time, sir!--‘for you to be married’;
-and I’m twenty-seven--and, really, you know, ‘my chances are
-lessening’--(that’s what they say, my dear); and I ‘hardly deserve,
-after all these years’”--
-
-“And offers?” suggested her lover.
-
-“After all these _years_, Billy,--not to get a crooked stick in the
-end.”
-
-“I am not crooked, I will admit,” he said.
-
-“Thirdly,” she proceeded, “you are very good-looking, and all the
-old Tabbies say that a handsome minister ought to be married.”
-
-“The old Tabbies might find something better to talk about,” he
-said, his face hardening. “Oh, Amy, that’s the kind of thing
-that makes a man cringe!--I mean a minister. Here is this great,
-serious, strenuous matter of living--the consciousness of God;
-that’s what living is in its highest expression. And to further
-that consciousness is the divinest human passion. A man tries to do
-it, gives his life to it, and immediately he is food for chattering
-old women! They gossip about his affairs, or his clothes, or his
-looks, even!” William West sat up, his face stirred with anger and
-pity. “But I suppose I must admit that the Parsons bring it on
-themselves to some extent,” he ended, with a sigh; “we don’t mingle
-enough with men; they distrust us, and think we talk twaddle about
-overcoming temptations we know nothing about. So, being shut out
-from masculine living, we do haunt tea-tables, and gabble about
-vestments. I suppose there’s no doubt of it. Amy, I believe that
-the old hunting, swearing parsons of three generations ago were of
-more real value in the world than the harmless creatures that we
-have now!”
-
-He had a certain stern way of thrusting out his lower lip when he
-was very much in earnest, and drawing his strong brows together; an
-impatient fire sprang into his beautiful dark eyes. He turned and
-looked at her, claiming her understanding.
-
-“Yes,” she said; “yes, it is so. The belittling of the profession
-of the ministry is a dreadful thing--a shameful thing. I once
-heard a man say that ‘Elderly unmarried women always had to have
-something to fuss over and coddle, something to lead around by
-a blue ribbon. Sometimes it was a poodle; sometimes it was a
-clergyman.’ And there’s truth in it, Billy.”
-
-“There is,” he said grimly.
-
-“Well, dear,” she reassured him, smiling, “your distinguished
-rudeness to the ladies of your congregation has at least protected
-you from the blue ribbon.”
-
-He began to protest, but the talk slipped back into their own
-affairs, and somehow he succeeded in getting her hand, and by and
-by they were silent, just for happiness, and because it was sunset,
-and the river was flickering with light, and there was a faint stir
-of leaves overhead. They were to be married in a fortnight, and
-they were going to have all their lives together to say how good
-life was, so there was no need to talk now.
-
-As the girl had said, it really was a very satisfactory match.
-William West was a man whom every one honored, and many loved.
-For fifteen years he had been settled in Mercer; first as an
-assistant to old Mr. Brown, and then as rector of the church.
-But he had taken his place in the community as a man of strong
-judgment and high character; perhaps as a citizen, rather than as
-a minister. Men felt that he was a man before he was a clergyman;
-not knowing that his calling had given him his highest manhood. He
-was singularly devoid of clerical affectation; consequently the
-influence of his own reverence was not vitiated by a suspicion of
-his common sense. In fact, his sanity in matters religious, joined
-to his knowledge of human nature, made him a man of importance in
-affairs municipal and social. That he had lived to be forty-two,
-and had not married, was from no asceticism; he was a very human
-person, and fully intended to have a wife; only, she must be just
-what he wanted. And so far, that “not impossible She” who was to
-possess his heart had never appeared. When she did, he recognized
-her immediately, and would have proposed to her the next day, had
-not a feeling of diffidence as to her sentiments deterred him for
-nearly two weeks. At the end of that time, he told her--ah, well,
-never mind what he told her! She, at least, will never forget the
-passion of that claiming.
-
-Amy Townsend had come to spend the winter in Mercer, with a cousin.
-Of course, the first Sunday she went to St. James’s, as everybody
-who was anybody did. When she came home, her eyes were keen with
-interest.
-
-“Do tell me about him, Cousin Kate,” she said. “I never heard that
-sort of preaching; what does it mean? Is he a real person, or is he
-just clever?” Mrs. Paul laughed.
-
-“Wait till you meet him! you’ll see.”
-
-But she also added to herself, “Wait till he meets you!” For Mrs.
-Paul was one of those courageous women who rush in where angels
-fear to tread; she was a match-maker.
-
-“Is he married?” the girl asked, naturally enough; but blushed
-furiously the next instant, which made her angry.
-
-“No; but it is not for lack of opportunity,” said Mrs. Paul dryly.
-“I declare, Amy, women are dreadful fools, sometimes! I should
-think a clergyman wouldn’t marry, out of sheer disgust for their
-silliness.”
-
-“Oh, he’s run after, is he?” Miss Townsend said coldly.
-
-“Well, I must admit he’s very attractive,” Mrs. Paul began,
-remembering her scheme, and retreating a little,--for nothing will
-put a girl against a man sooner than to know he is “run after.”
-
-Then she told his story: the boy had been a waif. (“His mother was
-respectable, I think,” said Mrs. Paul, “but nobody knows anything
-about the father.”) He had had that dreariest sort of childhood
-which knows no other home than an institution. Then, somehow,
-“quite like a story-book,” Mrs. Paul said, a gentleman took an
-interest in him, and began to help him in one way or another.
-
-“It was that zoölogical man, Professor Wilson; you know who I
-mean?” Mrs. Paul explained. “He looked after him. At first he put
-him in a tinshop, if you please, as errand-boy,--fancy! this man
-with the ‘grand manner.’”
-
-“Oh, I supposed he was a gentleman,” Amy Townsend said.
-
-“Amy, you are a snob,” her cousin answered hotly. “He is.”
-
-Mrs. Paul was so annoyed that she ended the story of Mr. West’s
-career very briefly. “Professor Wilson offered either to start him
-in business or put him through college; he chose to go to college.”
-
-“That was rather fine,” Miss Townsend agreed.
-
-“Fine? It just showed what sort of a man he was!” cried Mrs. Paul.
-“He worked his way to some extent; that is, he was Professor
-Wilson’s secretary, and he did a lot of tutoring. Professor Wilson
-left him a good deal of money, but he gave away nearly half of it
-at once, John says. Quite remarkable for a young man. Well, that’s
-all; you see what he is to-day--a gentleman and a scholar: John
-says there is no man in Mercer who has the influence that he has.”
-
-Miss Townsend, in spite of her careful indifference, was
-interested. And later, when Rev. William West met her, he, too, was
-“interested;” and all fell out as the most experienced romancer
-could desire.
-
-Amy had a little money, much charm, a certain distinction that
-answered for beauty, and a very true nature; there was, perhaps, a
-certain hard integrity about her, but her impulses were gracious.
-Also, as the old ladies said, she was a “worker.” She found life
-too interesting not to meddle with it.
-
-So it had come to pass that these two, who, as Mrs. Paul said,
-“were made for each other,” were going to be married.
-
- * * * * *
-
-“Just think, in two weeks!” he said, as they sat there under the
-oak, the blossoming grass knee-deep about them, and the air sweet
-with clover. “Amy, it does not seem as if I had been alive until
-now.”
-
-“I wonder, does it go on getting--nicer?” she asked him, a little
-shyly; “everything seems to be better, and more worth while.”
-
-“I understand,” he said.
-
-And they were silent for awhile, because understanding is enough,
-when people are in love. Then the girl’s gayety began to sparkle
-out.
-
-“Billy, Cousin Kate says if I’m not careful I’ll get to be a
-managing Parsoness; she says I must devote myself to you, not to
-your poor people.”
-
-“Mrs. Paul has given a great deal of good advice in her day,” the
-Rev. Billy remarked meditatively, “and I really think very little
-harm has come from it.”
-
-“She advised your being called to Mercer,” Amy retorted. “Did you
-know that?”
-
-“Know it? My dear child! how often have I dined at the Pauls’? Just
-so often have I heard it.”
-
-“Now, Billy, that’s not very nice in you.”
-
-“I but stated a fact; and I have a high regard for Mrs. Paul. Only,
-when I think how many girls she has tried to make marry me!--but
-they would none of them look at me.”
-
-“And in two weeks the opportunity will be gone,” she jeered.
-
-“Poor girls!” the minister commiserated; and was reproved for
-vanity. Indeed, just because happiness is so serious a thing, they
-became very frivolous, these two, sitting watching the sunset,
-and the river. Amy told him a funny story about the parish; he
-responded by another concerning Tom Reilly, a policeman; which
-reminded Amy to tell him that poor Tom had had an accident, and
-hurt his hand.
-
-“But it was very stupid in him,” she added, with a little of that
-resentful goodness that one sees sometimes in women. “I’m not at
-all sorry for him, because he deserved it. He had been drinking,
-and as he went stumbling out of a car, he crushed his hand in the
-door.”
-
-Her lover was not to be lured into professional comments; he
-only muttered, “_Mauvais quart d’heure_”--which made her say
-indignantly: “Now, Billy, really, that is _too_ much!” and insist
-that they should go home immediately. “I cannot descend to such
-levels,” she told him; and was very stern and forbidding when,
-looking to the right and left, and seeing no man, he begged to be
-allowed to kiss her.
-
-But this was all froth. Beneath, in the man’s life, were the great
-tides of love, moving, noiseless and unchangeable, from out the
-depths of his soul. In the girl’s life it was all shine and perfume
-and glitter, like flowers blossoming on a rock; beneath, in her
-heart, was the solid ground of reverence and faith.
-
-
-II
-
-The two weeks that were to pass before the day that was to be the
-Day of Days were very full.
-
-To get parish work ahead so that things would run themselves for
-the month’s absence which had been granted the clergyman was
-no small undertaking. William West was very busy, and a little
-preoccupied in his endeavor to put his best thought, not upon his
-own happiness, but upon committees, or Sunday-school matters, or
-his assistant’s spiritual anxieties concerning his superior’s
-indifference to the color of the lectern bookmarks; so it chanced
-that he saw less of Amy than in the earlier part of their
-engagement. He had but little time to think of her, and absolutely
-no time to think of himself.
-
-They were to be married on Thursday. Late Monday afternoon Mr.
-West, with great timidity, ventured into Mrs. Paul’s drawing-room,
-with the bold purpose of abstracting his sweetheart for a walk. The
-project was, of course, promptly crushed.
-
-“As though Amy had any time for that sort of thing!” said Mrs.
-Paul. “Do you see those presents? She has got to acknowledge every
-one of them! Amy, your cousin John and I will entertain Mr. West.
-You can write your notes here, and let him look at you; that’s
-quite enough for him.”
-
-Amy smiled at him across a barricade of silver bric-à-brac.
-
-“Billy thinks silver picture-frames and brushes and things are a
-dreadful waste of money,” she said. “Just think how thankful you
-ought to be, Billy, that I am making our manners for you; you
-couldn’t say ‘Thank you,’ with truth.”
-
-“Oh, truth,” said John Paul, lounging about the room, with his
-hands in his pockets--“truth, my dear little cousin, is governed by
-the law of benefit; didn’t you know that? If it makes the donors
-feel happy, tell them West has longed for nothing in the world so
-much as a silver glove buttoner. Now, if you told them the truth,
-fancy the shock! Ask the Parson.”
-
-“The Parson has no such base and cynical theory,” Miss Townsend
-responded promptly; “have you, Billy? You don’t think truth is
-governed by the law of benefit?”
-
-“I think truth-telling is,” he assured her.
-
-John Paul assumed that look of artless and simpering satisfaction
-which one sees on the countenance of the unprotected male, who, in
-the bosom of his family, finds himself indorsed by a higher power.
-
-“There, Amy, what did I tell you? I had an instance of it
-yesterday. I”--
-
-“Oh, here is a third asparagus fork,” murmured Amy; “what _shall_ I
-say about it?”
-
-“What’s your instance?” said the minister.
-
-“Well, we’ve been looking for an assistant engineer, and there
-have been the Lord only knows how many applicants. One fellow
-impressed me very well; he seemed as straight as a string; honest
-face, thoroughly decent-looking fellow. He was an Englishman, but
-his references for three years were American. So much the better,
-of course. I was going to engage him, when, bless my soul, if he
-didn’t begin to stammer out something about having no references
-from ‘Home’ (‘’ome,’ he called it), because he ‘’adn’t been over
-steady,’ but he’d signed the pledge, and ‘he wasn’t afraid of drink
-any more.’ I didn’t hire him. Now, I call that truth not governed
-by the law of benefit.”
-
-“You don’t discriminate between being truthful and telling the
-truth,” said William West. “You hadn’t asked him if he had ever
-drank. I don’t believe you lost much, in not engaging him, poor
-fellow.”
-
-“Oh, Billy, I think it was rather fine in him,” Amy protested,
-looking up from her notes.
-
-“I don’t see anything fine,” the minister said simply. “In the
-first place, there was a lack of reserve, a lack of privacy, in
-rushing into confession, which betrays the weak nature. There was
-also self-consciousness, in dwelling on his sin. And in the third
-place”--
-
-“This sounds like a sermon: firstly--secondly”--Amy murmured,
-signing her name to her thanks for the third asparagus fork.
-
---“in the third place, if the man has reformed, there was an
-essential untruth in posing as a sinner.”
-
-“Well, I don’t quite agree with that,” began Mrs. Paul.
-
-“He’s right; he’s right,” John Paul declared. “I say, West, suppose
-we went about confessing some of our college performances?” The
-senior warden of St. James grinned, but his wife looked displeased.
-
-“I don’t believe you ever did anything very bad, John; but if you
-did, I think you should have confessed to me.”
-
-“I stole some signs, Kate,” he told her; “can you forgive me?”
-
-Amy, listening, smiling, said with that charming sidewise glance at
-her lover: “Cousin Kate is quite right. I should never forgive a
-man who didn’t tell me everything! Billy, come here and confess.
-Have you ever done anything wicked?”
-
-“We are all miserable sinners,” John Paul murmured. “I say so
-publicly every Sunday”--
-
-“But you don’t specify!” the minister reminded him, with a laugh.
-
-“Yes; but, Billy,” Amy Townsend insisted, “doesn’t it say somewhere
-that ‘confession is good for the soul’?”
-
-“Perhaps it is,” he said dryly, “but, generally speaking, it’s
-mighty bad for the mind.”
-
-There was an outcry at this from the two women.
-
-“Of course,” Mrs. Paul said, “simply gossiping about one’s self
-isn’t confession; but don’t you think, Mr. West, in the really deep
-relations of life, between friend and friend, or husband and wife,
-there should be no reserves?”
-
-“My dear Mrs. Paul,” he answered, with quick gravity, “there must
-be reserves--except with God. The human soul is solitary. But for
-confession, that is different; justice and reparation sometimes
-demand it; but, again, justice and courage sometimes forbid it.
-Unless it is necessary, it is flabby vanity. That’s why I said it
-was bad for the mind.”
-
-“Well,” said Amy, with some spirit, “I don’t believe in taking
-respect, or--or love, on false pretenses. If I had ever done any
-dreadful thing, I should want to confess; good gracious, for the
-mere comfort of it I should have to! It would be like walking on a
-volcano to keep a secret.”
-
-William West went over to the table where she was writing, and,
-finding a place among the clutter of presents to lean his elbow,
-sat down and looked at her with good-humored amusement.
-
-“Where are you going to draw the line? How far back are you going
-in confessing your sins? Please don’t tell me that you slapped your
-nurse when you were three. It would be a horrible shock, and make
-me very unhappy to discover such a crime.”
-
-“I shall go all the way back,” said Amy, with decision; “if I had
-done anything wrong, I mean very wrong, I should tell you,--if I
-had only been a year old!”
-
-The minister laughed. “A desperate villain of one year!” he said;
-but as he spoke a puzzled look came into his eyes.
-
-“I think,” Amy Townsend proceeded, “that honor and fairness demand
-speaking out. And as for making some one else unhappy,” her voice
-dropped a little, and the color came up into her face, “where
-people love each other, they have a right to unhappiness.”
-
-“Listen to Amy clamoring for unhappiness!” John Paul commented.
-“Don’t worry, my child; you’ll get your share. There’s enough to go
-round, I’ve noticed.”
-
-Mrs. Paul laughed, but a note of reality had come into the careless
-talk that gave her a sense of being a third party.
-
-“John, you are flippant,” she said; “come, let’s leave these two
-poor things alone; they’re dying to get rid of us. And besides, if
-Amy is going to confess her sins since she was one year old, it
-will take time.”
-
-“That I consider a most uncalled for reference to my twenty-seven
-years,” Amy retorted; “and besides, I’ve two more notes to write.”
-
-“And I must go home,” William West said, rising in a preoccupied
-manner.
-
-“Why--but I thought you were going to stay to dinner!” Mrs. Paul
-protested, with dismay.
-
-“Oh, you must stay to dinner,” Amy urged.
-
-But her lover was resolute. Nor did he, as usual, try to lure
-her out into the hall that he might make his adieus. He said
-good-night, stopped a moment to discuss with his senior warden
-something about the appropriation for repairs at St. James, and
-then, with a sober abstraction deepening in his face, went home
-through the delicate June dusk, which was full of the scent of the
-roses that grow behind the garden walls of the old-fashioned part
-of Mercer.
-
-
-III
-
-The Rev. William West went into his study and shut the door. He
-was a man who was always accessible to his people, yet his lips
-tightened with impatience when he found a parishioner awaiting him,
-and saw a pile of notes on his writing-table. But it was only for
-an instant; he listened to the anxieties of his caller with that
-concentration of sympathy which can put self aside; and when the
-man went away it was with the other man’s heartfelt grip of the
-hand, his heartfelt “I thank you for coming to me; God bless you,
-my friend, and give you wisdom.”
-
-The letters were not so easy; but he went through them faithfully,
-answering them or filing them away: appeals for help, or money, or
-work; two invitations; two letters from ladies of his congregation
-about their souls; the unmarried and interesting clergyman knows
-this sort of letter too well! He was aware of a sense of haste
-in getting through with these things; a sense of haste even in
-disposing of another caller, a boy, who came to say he had doubts
-about the existence of God, and who felt immensely important in
-consequence. “I tell you, Mr. West,” this youth declared, nodding
-his head, “of course I don’t mean to be hard on the church; of
-course I see the value of such a belief in keeping the masses
-straight, but, for thinking men!” To treat this sort of thing
-seriously and patiently is one of the trials of a thinking man who
-happens to be a minister. Then the Tenor came to give his side of
-the quarrel with the Bass, and the organist to say that quartette
-and chorus were all fools.
-
-One does not prove the existence of God, or pacify wounded artistic
-feelings easily; it was nearly midnight before the clergyman had
-his library to himself.
-
-With a sigh of relief he shut the door, and walked once or twice
-about the room, as though trying to shake off other people’s
-affairs; then he bit off the end of a cigar, struck a match, and
-sat down. He put his hands deep into his pockets, and stretched
-his feet straight out in front of him.
-
-“It must be five years since I’ve thought of it,” he said to
-himself.
-
-He held his lighted cigar between his fingers, his chin sunk on his
-breast, his mouth set in that hard line which refuses to extenuate
-or evade; his eyes narrowed with thought. Five years: Yes, the
-memory had so faded and lessened that by and by it had ceased, and
-now it was as though, as he walked along the level path of daily
-life, a serpent suddenly lifted its evil head from the dust, and
-struck at him, hissing.
-
-“I was eighteen,” he said to himself; “no, nineteen. And now I’m
-forty-two! Twenty-nine, thirty-nine--it’s twenty-three years ago.”
-
-There is a hideous consciousness which comes to most of us men and
-women at one time or another in our lives, of our inability to get
-away from the past. From out of the “roaring loom of Time” comes
-the fabric of our lives; white, run, perhaps, with a warp of silver
-in our latter years; set, even, by the mercy of God, with deep
-jewels of experience; spangled with golden threads of opportunity;
-but back, in its beginnings--what stains, what rents! dragged
-through what foul and primeval experiences of youth! Some, by
-environment and temperament, have nothing to blush for but follies;
-the joyous baseness of the young animal never broke through the
-conditions of their lives, or the dullness of their minds. But for
-most there are black spots from which, with wonder and disgust, the
-adult turns away his eyes: the cruelty and impurity of childhood;
-the ingratitude and meanness of youth. With the man, as with the
-race, that is not first which is spiritual, but that which is
-natural.
-
-Twenty-three years ago: is there any connection between a fault
-committed then and the William West of to-day? None! What has he in
-common with the boy of nineteen? Nothing!
-
-Suppose he told Amy, would she understand that? Why, the very fact
-that he had forgotten it meant that he did not belong to it, nor
-it to him. And yet he wanted to tell her!
-
-William West got up with an impatient gesture. How absurd this
-sort of mental posturing and agonizing was! What folly, to think
-of burdening Amy with the miserable facts. Told now, twenty-three
-years afterwards, their relation to his present life could not be
-seen in true proportion. It would be an amazement and a shame to
-her to think that her lover, her husband, had done thus and so.
-Yet, it would not be her husband who was the sinner; it was that
-poor, foolish, wicked boy of so many years ago; that boy upon
-whom he looked back with the amazement and disgust of an outside
-observer. What a curious untruth, then, in confessing it. He gave a
-sigh of relief as he reached this conclusion; it was as if he had
-stumbled for a moment, but had got his balance again.
-
-But, in spite of himself, his mind crept back to the brink of
-that black abyss of memory: those were dreadful days, those days
-of repentance twenty years ago. The remembrance of his sin would
-surge over him at the most unexpected moments--in the midst of
-work or study; when he was talking; when he was praying; when,
-perhaps, he was helping some other human creature stagger along
-under a burden of remorse. The deeper he went into the new life
-he had begun to lead--the clearer the heavenly vision grew before
-his eyes--the blacker the sin seemed. For years, the memory of
-it used to come over him with a sudden sinking and sickening of
-the soul. He remembered how inescapable the torment of his regret
-had been. There would be periods of forgetfulness, when he was
-plunged into work, and life, because it was service, seemed good
-and sweet; then, at some word, or the look of the sky, or the
-smell of a flower--the evil spirit of recollection would leap upon
-him and tear him. Yet the periods of forgetfulness had lengthened
-and lengthened. The pain and shame had faded and faded. The thing
-that gave him this sick feeling, as he sat here in his study at
-midnight, was not the fact that he had sinned; it was the memory
-of how he had suffered for his sin. The sin itself, now, was too
-remote, too separate from himself for any more repentance; it had
-ceased to be real. But the suffering!--he could not bear to think
-of that.
-
-“How mad this is!” he said to himself, with a curious terror lest
-the old anguish should come back: the horror a man might feel who
-sees the surgeon’s knife under which he has once agonized.
-
-For very fear of memory, William West drove his thoughts back to
-the question of his duty to Amy; that was plain reasoning, and had
-nothing to do with this nightmare.
-
-He lighted another match, but held it absently, until it scorched
-his fingers, then flung it down with an angry exclamation. It
-seemed as though the pain burned through all this fog of the past,
-and showed him the facts which he must judge, and the folly of his
-uncertainty. For, after all, what was this matter he was trying to
-decide? Was it not merely the question of what was best for Amy,
-not what was most comfortable for himself? It was that abstraction
-called Honor, as applied to Amy’s happiness.
-
-What was for her happiness, or, as he had put it first, what was
-his duty to her? To let her know his past, or to keep a secret from
-her, and allow her to suppose that she knew his life as she did her
-own?
-
-Admit that it was his impulse to tell her; what did that impulse
-really mean? Primarily, that it would be a great relief to him;
-the idea of having any reserves was most repugnant to him. For the
-moment the instinct was again strong to tell her. But, frowning,
-he went on with his argument: A relief to him; but what to her? A
-pain and a shame; a memory that might outlast another twenty-three
-years, perhaps. But she might want to know it? Well, that was no
-reason. If she wanted poison, should he give it to her? And this
-was poison. Did he not know that? Good God!
-
-But she had a right to know it? Here he was perfectly clear;
-certainly not. It in no wise bore upon his relation to her.
-Furthermore, the question of prudence was not involved; there was
-no chance that some day, somehow, it might come to her ears. She
-could never hear it, except from him. If this were not the case, of
-course he would tell her.
-
-But was he deceiving her? Was he, as she put it, “taking her love
-on false pretenses”? William West got up and walked the length of
-his library; then he stopped by the open window, and looked out on
-the silent street; a policeman on his beat glanced up and saw him,
-and touched his helmet with two fingers.
-
-“Good-evening, sir; don’t know but what I’d better say
-good-morning!”
-
-“What! Is it as late as all that, Reilly?” the minister said; and
-added a friendly inquiry about the man’s hand, which seemed to be
-hurt. Amy’s stern sense of the retributive justice of the accident
-came into his mind, and he smiled involuntarily. The policeman
-looked sheepish, as the clergyman meant he should, and turned the
-conversation by remarking that he would “be lookin’ after the
-rectory special when Mr. West was away on his weddin’ tower.”
-
-“Thank you, Reilly!” the other answered heartily.
-
-The policeman’s steps went echoing off into the night; a street
-lamp flickered, and a puff of soft wind wandered into the window.
-
-_Deceiving her: taking her love under false pretenses._
-
-Was he anything but the man Amy supposed him to be? Very humbly,
-very truly, he said to himself that, by the grace of God, he was
-an honest, pure, God-fearing man. That sin of twenty-three years
-ago was not his sin. He, William West, forty-two years old, whose
-honorable record in the community was spread through all these
-years of service, was not that base, mean, wicked boy. The sin was
-not his. It was a sin of youth; a sin almost of childhood. It meant
-nothing to him now.
-
-“It is nothing now,” he insisted, passionately. Accustomed to
-weigh other people’s actions and motives, he knew that he was
-discriminating with almost judicial impartiality when he thus
-looked himself in the face. “_A repentant man has no more to do
-with his sin, for which he has repented and made reparation, than a
-well man has to do with the disease of which he has been cured._”
-He remembered that he had used this illustration once to some one
-else; he must apply it now to himself. No; he was not deceiving
-Amy. He was only sparing her--sparing her, to be sure, from a
-pain she might wish to bear, but that had nothing to do with the
-question. If she knew, she would suffer; not from a fact, but from
-an illusion; for he would be confessing a sin which was not his
-sin. Honor? The word seemed artificial as he thus put the situation
-before him.
-
-No; it would be cowardly to tell her, and it would be untrue. There
-was nothing for him to do but face the fact that, to spare her,
-he must bear, for the rest of his life, the wretched burden of
-realizing that he had a secret from her.
-
-Sanely, truly, this good man believed that his impulse to tell the
-woman he loved was selfish and cowardly; it was an impulse to make
-her share a burden which he deserved to bear alone. Furthermore,
-it was the effect, not of reason, not of religion, not of
-love; it was the effect, first, of the selfish desire to seek
-relief by sharing a cruel knowledge; secondly, of a traditional
-sentimentality, the weak and driveling outcome of that sense of
-justice which is expressed in the willingness to bear consequences.
-
-Well, the boy who had sinned had borne the consequences; he had
-suffered.
-
-For the man to suffer now, twenty-three years after, was
-unreasonable, but inevitable.
-
-For a woman, who had no part or lot in that young past, to suffer
-now, twenty-three years afterwards, was foolish and useless.
-
-If the man permitted it, he was a coward and a fool.
-
-This, at least, was what William West told himself.
-
-
-IV
-
-The conclusion to which the Rev. Mr. West came was that, if his
-love for Amy was deep enough and unselfish enough, he would hold
-his tongue. He believed that confession, apart from reparation, was
-the refuge of the weak mind.
-
-Having thus decided to bear alone the burden of his secret, he
-went, early in the morning, and told the woman he loved.
-
-Of course, there is no explanation of this vacillation and
-indifference to his own judgment, except the mere statement that he
-was in love.
-
-“Amy is trying on her dress,” Mrs. Paul said, when he was ushered
-into the library, “so, if you want to see her, you can go home at
-once. But perhaps you may condescend to talk to me a little while?”
-
-“I must see Amy, please,” he said. He had a way of putting people
-aside so gently and peremptorily that Mrs. Paul, who was not a
-yielding person, never dreamed of protesting.
-
-“I’ll tell her. But she really can’t come down for ten minutes. Do
-you mind waiting?”
-
-“Very much,” he said smiling. “Tell her to come down just as she
-is, and let me see her frock.”
-
-“Indeed, she shan’t do anything of the sort,” said Mrs. Paul, with
-indignation; but relented to the extent of letting him have the
-library to himself, and going upstairs to send the girl to him.
-
-Amy came floating in with a snowy gleam and rustle, and stood
-before him, bidding him not to dare to touch her; though, indeed,
-being a mere man, he was far too uncomfortably awed to think of
-taking this glorious white creature into his poor human arms.
-
-“You are magnificent, but you are not Amy,” he said; “do get on
-some common clothes. I’m afraid of you.”
-
-“That is as it should be, sir!” she told him. “I shall dress
-like this every day if it keeps you obedient. If I had had on my
-wedding-dress last night, you would not have dared not to stay to
-dinner when I--wanted you.”
-
-Her look, through the mist of tulle, of soft reproach and
-challenge, was too much for fear, and he boldly kissed her; which
-made her protest, and fly from further risk of crushing the bravery
-of her wedding-day. When she came back again, in a blue cotton
-gown, trig and pretty, with a bunch of pansies in her belt, there
-was, fortunately, nothing to be hurt by being crushed.
-
-There was a moment of tender and passionate silence. His errand
-faded from William West’s mind; the reality of life was here! his
-past was no more to him than the eggshell is to the eagle. So
-when, later, leaning forward in his chair, holding her hand in
-his, looking into her pure eyes, he began to speak, it was almost
-casually. Before the great fact of human love, the question of
-telling her or not telling her of that old dead and buried sin was
-suddenly unimportant,--they loved each other!
-
-“Dear,” he said, “I’ve come to tell you something. What you said
-last night about having no reserves put it into my head. I had
-forgotten it.”
-
-It was characteristic of the man that there was no preamble;
-his words were simple, and he was perfectly matter-of-fact and
-unanxious; so much so that Amy laughed.
-
-“Were you a year-old criminal? Well, tell me at once! I may
-reconsider, you know.”
-
-There was something in the assurance of her gayety that jarred a
-little, and he said seriously:--
-
-“It is a wrongdoing of my youth, Amy. I’m not sure that it is not
-selfish to tell you about it; but I can’t bear the feeling of
-holding anything back from you.”
-
-An answering gravity came into the girl’s face, but she smiled.
-
-“Tell me anything; I am not afraid to hear!”
-
-Her innocent pride gave him a moment of sharp discomfort. Curiously
-enough, what he had to tell her had not connected itself, in his
-mind, with personal embarrassment; it had been too remote from
-himself. He found himself hesitating for a word, and grasping
-after that indifference to all but Love which he had felt but a
-moment before.
-
-“Perhaps I am a fool to tell you,” he began; “it may make you
-unhappy, and”--
-
-A startled look came into Amy’s eyes; then the color flooded up
-into her face. She lifted her head with a beautiful, imperious
-gesture, and stopped him with a word.
-
-“I--understand. Don’t tell me. I--understand.” She bit her lip as
-she spoke, and her eyelids quivered as though the tears had risen
-suddenly.
-
-“You understand?” he repeated, in a puzzled voice; “do you mean you
-don’t want me to tell you?”
-
-“William,” she said, in a low voice, “I do not think a woman has
-any business with a good man’s life in the past; if--he was not
-good. I am not a young girl. I am old enough to know that a man’s
-life and a girl’s life are--different; but don’t tell me. I--love
-you. Don’t tell me.” She trembled as she spoke, and then her eyes
-sought his, filled with love and grief.
-
-A wave of tenderness made his whole face melt and quiver. He
-murmured something of his undesert of such love as this:--
-
-“You are not like other women,” he told her, as every lover has
-told his mistress since the sun first shone on lovers. “That
-sin, the mean woman does not forgive. And yet it is so much more
-pardonable than some other sins! More pardonable, dear, than what I
-want to tell you.”
-
-She drew a quick breath and smiled. “Ah,” she said, “I’m glad it
-is not that!” Her relief was so apparent that he realized how
-austerely sweet her face had been as she forgave him.
-
-“Go on and tell me,” she said; “I am not afraid to hear anything
-now.”
-
-“That would have been the hardest thing to forgive?” he asked her.
-She flashed a look of pride at him.
-
-“The things I could not forgive, you could not do!”
-
-This made him glow. After all, who would not confess anything, to
-be met by such confident love as this?
-
-“This happened long ago, Amy; when I was nineteen. I forged a check
-for five hundred dollars.”
-
-“Forged!” Her lips fell apart; she sat staring at him.
-
-He was holding her hand, lifting it to his lips sometimes, and
-looking at it as it lay in his. He went on, quietly:--
-
-“It was when I was at college; I needed money; and--poor,
-desperate, wicked, silly young man--I forged Professor Wilson’s
-name. I don’t know what I supposed would become of me when it
-was found out. And I don’t know what would have become of me,
-but Henry Wilson died before the month was out, and so, by some
-strange chance, it never was discovered. If it had been--well,
-you and I would not have been here to-day. Human justice would
-have interposed before Divine mercy”--He looked up with a solemn
-elation which seemed to put self out of his mind. “I might have
-gone lower and lower! Who can say? It was an easy thing to do,
-for I was his secretary, and he trusted me. That, of course, was
-the most horrible part of what I did, the part that now seems to
-me incomprehensible--the broken trust! Well, of course, I made
-reparation, as I called it, out of the money he left me. I gave
-away many times the amount I stole; but it was only because I was
-scared at the risk I had run, and the thought of it harassed me. It
-was a sort of expedient morality, you know; a sort of bargain with
-my conscience for peace of mind. Then, about a year afterwards, I
-met X----. I heard him preach, and life changed. How extraordinary
-it seems to look back upon it now! Then I repented. Before, I had
-only reformed. That was when I entered the divinity school. But
-just think, Amy, just think of the difference! How life might have
-gone--yet here I am to-day, your lover, your husband. Oh, the mercy
-of God!”
-
-He was deeply moved. He got up and walked the length of the room.
-Amy sat silently looking down at her hands in her lap. When he
-came back, his eyes were full of peace.
-
-“That is all, dearest; now we will forget it. You know my life as
-you do your own.”
-
-“Forget it?” she repeated, with a sudden, sobbing laugh, that tore
-at the man’s heart.
-
-“Amy! dearest! have I shocked you so? Remember, it was twenty-three
-years ago; I was only a boy. Let me tell you how it was: I was
-madly in love with a woman; at least, it was not love, but I
-thought it was; she fascinated me, and”--
-
-“Oh, go on--go on!” she interrupted, hoarsely; “as if I cared about
-that!”
-
-He tried to take her hand, but she made a pretense of arranging
-the flowers in her belt; her head was turned a little from him. He
-leaned forward, with a grave authority to command her attention,
-took the pansies from her, and held them in his hand.
-
-“I was possessed to marry her. Of course, she would not look at
-me--a penniless, charity student. But I strained every nerve to
-win her. It was the old story. She took my flowers, or theatre
-tickets, or anything I could give her. Curious, the mercenariness
-of the woman did not revolt me! But I was mad about her. I thought,
-at last, that if I had money I could give her some jewels she
-wanted, and perhaps she would accept me. That was how it came
-about. She took the diamonds, and eloped with a married man two
-days afterwards.”
-
-As he told the story, the grossness of it all came over him,--the
-offense to the exquisite delicacy of the girl beside him.
-
-“But I ought not to have told you this,” he stammered.
-
-“What?” she said dully. “About the woman? Oh, as if that mattered!”
-She turned from him sharply, putting the back of her hand against
-her lips as though to hide their quiver.
-
-Then she burst out: “Oh, why did you tell me? Why? why? Oh, I wish
-you had not told me!” She shook from head to foot. “But it will
-make no difference! I will not let it make any difference. I am
-going to marry you. Only--_I never knew you_!”
-
-Those most terrible words, those words with which Love destroys
-itself, came like a blow between the eyes. He grew very pale. “‘Not
-make any difference’?” he repeated, blankly, “why, what difference
-could it make?”
-
-She stopped crying, suddenly, and stood, panting, steadying herself
-by her hands upon his breast, and staring at him. There was
-something almost terrifying in this sudden pause and in her burning
-look.
-
-“It’s the one thing,” she said, “don’t you see? that lasts. It
-isn’t like--other things.”
-
-“But it was not I,” he said, mechanically. “Not I, the man you--you
-thought you knew. It was a boy, twenty-three years ago. Amy, Amy!
-Twenty-three years ago!”
-
-She did not listen; she kept repeating to herself: “It shall make
-no difference. I will not let it make any difference.” Alas, it was
-not for her to say! The difference was made; the jewel crushed
-under foot is no more a jewel; the rose thrown into the fire is no
-more a rose. The stained human soul is no more the innocent human
-soul.
-
-“But you must listen to me, Amy,” he said. “No, I will not speak
-until you are calm. Sit down. Look at me. Now, listen to what
-I have to say.” He spoke slowly and gently, as one does to a
-terrified, unreasonable child.
-
-“Dear, I had forgotten it. So little is it a part of my life that
-I had forgotten it. When I remembered it last night, it was with a
-sense of astonishment, a sense of pity for the mad boy who did it.
-I had no personal shame,--it seemed to belong to some one else,
-whom I watched with sorrow and indignation. I do not believe that
-to-day, more than twenty years afterwards, I have any business to
-think of it.”
-
-“Then why did you tell me?” she said wearily. “Oh, don’t talk about
-it any more. I am going to forget it. Good-by. I am going upstairs.
-I have a headache. Good-by.”
-
-She let her hand slip listlessly out of his, and left him standing,
-blankly, his lips parted for another protest, and the flowers from
-her belt between his fingers.
-
-
-V
-
-As he went out past the drawing-room door, Mrs. Paul called to
-him:--
-
-“Do come here a moment, Mr. West. Isn’t Amy pretty in her
-wedding-dress? You really must tell me what to do about something.
-There is a family”--and she entered upon a puzzling question of
-relief work, her forehead gathering into a frown, yet with her kind
-eyes denying the severe common-sense of her statement, that if a
-man will not work neither shall he eat.
-
-“But you see we can’t let the children go hungry,” she ended.
-
-The consideration of other people’s weaknesses and wickedness gave
-William West time to get his breath; he threw himself into the
-question with keen and intelligent sympathy. He pointed out this;
-he suggested that; he cleared the puzzle out of Mrs. Paul’s face,
-and all the time he was half deafened by a clamoring suspicion:
-“Have I been a fool? She will never forget it! It will always be
-between us. I’ve been a cowardly fool.”
-
-“Well, that’s all settled,” said Mrs. Paul, with an air of relief;
-“now tell me, what day shall I have Amy’s things sent to the
-rectory? And shall I take the silver from the bank the day before
-you arrive? Is it safe to leave it at your house? I hate the
-responsibility of other people’s silver!”
-
-“Oh, certainly, yes,” he answered, suddenly absent; and, with a
-curt good-by, left her.
-
-Somehow or other, he hardly knew how, he got through the day. There
-was a service in the afternoon, and there were other people’s
-affairs and sorrows to remember; fortunately, there always is duty
-for us poor human creatures as a refuge from our thoughts! Duties
-to be done saved William West from desperately going back to Amy to
-explain. For he was guilty of the impulse of “explanation,” the
-babble with which the weak mind is forever annotating its remarks
-or its opinions.
-
-Well, the day passed. In spite of a craving to see Amy that was
-almost agonizing, he held on to his common-sense, and left her to
-herself. In the evening, his lawyer came in, bringing some papers
-in regard to certain property which it was the minister’s intention
-to make over to his wife, and the looking these over, and the
-business talk, was a relief to him. He began to feel that he had
-taken Amy’s perturbation much too seriously; it would be all right;
-she would see things clearly when the first dismay had passed. He
-thought, tenderly, that he must not let her feel any regret for
-having for a moment shown him her pain at what he had told her. Her
-pain was only part of her exquisite goodness, that goodness which
-held her, remote and lovely, like some pure and luminous star, so
-far above the sordid meannesses and wickednesses of common life
-that she could not understand them; perhaps even she could not pity
-them. Only the sinlessness which was in all points tempted like as
-we are can at once understand and pity; his thought, chastened and
-passionate, fled back to his Master for comfort,--yet there was no
-reproach of Amy in his mind.
-
-It must have been after ten, as he and Mr. Woodhouse sat before the
-broad writing-table, with the litter of papers and memoranda before
-them, that John Paul suddenly burst into the room.
-
-The senior warden’s strong, kind face was flushed; he was plainly
-profoundly disturbed and upset.
-
-“West”--he said explosively, and stopped, seeing that they were not
-alone. “My dear fellow,” he began again, stammering with agitation,
-“can I see you a moment? A matter of business, Woodhouse, if you
-don’t mind. Can we go into another room, West?”
-
-But the lawyer protested that he was just about to go home. “I have
-married a wife; you’ll see how it is yourself, Billy, pretty soon!
-Lois allows me twenty minutes leeway of the hour I name to get
-home, and if I’m not back then, she threatens to send a policeman
-after me. Good-night. Good-night, John.” And he went whistling off
-into the night.
-
-The minister had not spoken.
-
-“Look here,” John Paul said, as the front door banged, “what
-under the sun is this business? Good Lord, West, Amy’s sent you
-a letter--Kate told me to break it to you, but I--confound it,
-man--go and read it. The girl’s crazy. Go and read it. What are we
-going to do?”
-
-Without a word William West took the letter and read it, standing
-facing Mr. Paul. (“It looked,” John Paul told his wife afterwards,
-“as though he died, then and there.”)
-
- “_You were right to tell me--only please--please don’t make me
- marry you. I cannot. I could never forget. If it were anything
- else--anything else--it would be different; but theft--oh, how
- cruel I am to say that! but I cannot marry you. There’s no use
- talking about forgiveness. I don’t want you to forgive me. I
- want you to hate me; then you will suffer less. Hate me. I’m
- not worth anything else. I’m going home to-morrow. It can be
- said I am ill, and the wedding is put off. I am ill, it won’t
- be a lie. Please don’t ask to see me. I cannot see you. Forgive
- me._
-
- _A._”
-
-William West sat down, folding the letter between his fingers.
-
-“There’s nothing to be said.” He spoke very quietly. Then he opened
-the letter again, and looked down at it.
-
-“West, for God’s sake,” John Paul entreated him; “listen, man!
-don’t take it like that. The girl is out of her mind. Here, pull
-yourself together! It’s a passing whim; you will bring her to her
-senses as soon as you see her.”
-
-“She will not see me,” he said. As he spoke his eye caught the
-headlines of the deed of gift, and he read them absently:--
-
- “=This Indenture= _made this ---- day of ----, Anno Domini
- 18--, Witnesseth: that William West, the grantor, for divers
- good and valuable considerations to him moving, has, and by
- these presents does give, grant, and convey_”--
-
-The fold in the deed hid the rest.
-
-“She’s got to see you!” John Paul said angrily. “What’s the matter
-with her? Is she out of her senses? All I know is what Kate told
-me. She asked me to bring you the letter. She said Amy had broken
-her engagement. You could have knocked me over with a straw. She
-wouldn’t give any reasons. But I’m touched by this business. If a
-woman in my household suddenly forgets honor and common decency,
-I’m touched by it! Unless you’ve given her cause?”
-
-He walked up and down, breathing hard, his hands thrust into his
-pockets, jingling his latchkeys for the mere relief of doing
-something. William West put the little note into his pocket.
-
-“I’ve given her cause,” he said.
-
-His senior warden stopped in front of him, and looked at him
-critically. “You’re lying to me. I know you! It’s a girl’s whim,
-and I’m touched by it, I tell you. She’s a member of my family.
-I shall see her (she wouldn’t see me before I started here), and
-straighten this business out. Kate is nearly dead with it. My wife
-looked like a ghost when she came and told me--and the wedding day
-after to-morrow! No; I’m going to straighten this thing out. What I
-want you to do is to tell me, man to man, what started it?”
-
-“Amy is perfectly justified,” William West said dully. “I told her
-this morning that I had committed a forgery.”
-
-“A--?” John Paul sat down, his mouth open, his plump hands on his
-knees, his eyes starting from his head.
-
-“You are out of your mind!”
-
-William West laughed shortly.
-
-“I think, perhaps, I was when I told her. Yes; I was a fool. It
-was twenty-three years ago; I had just about forgotten it. When I
-remembered, I told her. It was too much for her. She is right to
-stop now. If she can throw me over, thank Heaven she has done so!”
-
-The bitterness of it burst out in that last sentence. Then,
-quietly, he told Amy’s cousin the story of that long-buried youth.
-When it was done, John Paul said huskily:--
-
-“West, I don’t know what to think of your telling her; but I know
-what to think of you. And I know what to think of Amy.”
-
-William West said nothing; he took the little note out of his
-pocket and turned it over and over.
-
-(“He seemed to go to pieces before my eyes,” John Paul told his
-wife. “I tell you, Kate, I saw him lose his moral grip! Poor
-West--poor fellow!”)
-
-Mr. Paul sat helplessly looking at his clergyman, until he had a
-sense of indecency in watching the suffering of this silent human
-creature. Then he said vaguely:--
-
-“I suppose you want me to clear out? But just tell me; what do you
-want me to do?”
-
-“Nothing.”
-
-“But don’t you mean to make any effort to bring her to her senses?”
-burst out the other.
-
-“There’s nothing to be done,” the lover said. “It’s over--don’t
-you see?”
-
-“It’s not over,” insisted Amy’s cousin; “I shall see her; this
-thing can’t go on. I’ll send for you; you are well rid of her; it
-will be all right, I”--Storming and protesting and contradicting
-himself, he went out of the rectory, scarcely noticing that his
-host saw him to the door, and let him out, in absolute silence.
-
-Then William West went back and locked himself into his library.
-
-
-VI
-
-The senior warden of St. James was wrong when he said that his
-minister lost his moral grip. There was, no doubt, a time of
-upheaval and shock, a staggering under a calamity which seemed to
-have no moral excuse, to be only a senseless shattering of a human
-life.
-
-But he got his balance again. He made no effort to see Amy. This
-was partly to spare her, and partly from a sense of the futility
-of argument; the thing was done; if she married him ten times
-over, it would not be the same. As she said, she had never known
-him; and perhaps he had never known her. But, for that matter, who
-of us knows the other? The question is, is it worth while to try
-to attain, or to bestow, such knowledge? Gossip, of course, had
-run riot when it was known that he had been jilted; but gossip,
-after it reaches a certain point of insult and falsehood, becomes
-a source of amusement to its victims. West, with his delicate
-sense of humor, found other people’s opinions of his sufferings
-not without interest. It being nobody’s business but his own,
-only three people besides Miss Townsend and himself knew the
-facts--the Pauls and his own lawyer; so no light was thrown upon
-the subject to Mercer, which seethed and bubbled, and made itself
-wildly ludicrous. The minister went away after that first fury of
-parish excitement was over, and came back in four months, quite
-brown, with a good appetite, and several very interesting pieces
-of tapestry which he had picked up on the other side. He dined a
-little less frequently at the Pauls’, and was never once reminded
-that Mrs. Paul had been instrumental in bringing him to Mercer.
-
-He became, perhaps, a little more of a man’s man; a little more
-impatient with his feminine correspondents; a little less polite
-to the old ladies, who thought him less good-looking “since his
-disappointment.” But he took a deep and passionate hold upon
-affairs; the conditions of labor, the hideous problems of vice; the
-reformation of the sordid politics of the small city in which he
-lived,--these things filled his life. Were they enough? Who knows!
-We make husks into bread when the soul starves.
-
-As for Amy, that is another story.
-
- * * * * *
-
-It was nearly two years after this that John Paul walked home one
-night with Mr. Woodhouse, who was a fellow vestryman of St. James.
-They had been sitting smoking by William West’s fireside, talking
-over a strike which was on in one of the mills, where it seemed
-as though the rights lay with the strikers; a fact which these
-gentlemen believed to be unusual. It was nearly midnight when they
-left the rectory and went along the empty, echoing street together.
-
-“It strikes me,” said Mr. Paul, “that you hadn’t much to say for
-yourself to-night, Woodhouse. You’re the canniest fellow about
-giving an opinion! Didn’t you want to commit yourself?”
-
-“I haven’t any opinion yet,” said the other man slowly; “and,
-somehow, I got to thinking--I say, John, after all, what do you
-make of West’s telling Miss Townsend that matter?”
-
-“I think she didn’t know which side her bread was buttered,” John
-Paul said gruffly.
-
-“Oh, that’s another question,” the lawyer said. “I think almost any
-woman is too good for almost any man. I wonder they don’t all think
-better of it at the last moment, and throw us over!”
-
-“How long have you been married, Gifford?” the older man inquired
-cynically. “I’ll tell you what Kate says: Kate says if Amy could
-throw him over, she ought to have had the chance to. So she thinks
-West ought to have told her.”
-
-“That’s like saying, if there is a chance of breaking your neck by
-taking some preposterous leap, take it,” the lawyer commented. “But
-as I look back at it now, and see how it has aged Billy, and--well,
-hardened him a little, I think--it seems such an unnecessary
-calamity; such a blunder! And yet”--
-
-“Kate has views about heredity, and all that sort of thing,” Mr.
-Paul explained. “She says a woman has a right to say her children
-shan’t have a--shady character for a father. That was too much for
-me; I don’t generally contradict my Boss; it isn’t peaceful. But
-that was too much for me! Billy West shady! I gave my wife a piece
-of my mind. I tell you, Woodhouse, women are hard.”
-
-“Well, but there’s something in that,” the lawyer protested. “A
-woman has not only a right, but a duty, to think of her children,
-and a possible moral taint”--
-
-“Moral grandmother!” John Paul broke in; “West is one man in
-a hundred. I think he’s well rid of Amy: I told him so at the
-time. Why, look here; a man who has not repented of his sin has
-no inclination to confess it. And, having repented and made
-reparation, confession becomes a mere matter of expediency. Why,
-good heavens, Gifford! is there to be no escape from sin? What’s
-all this talk about forgiveness mean, if we’ve got to rake up
-the past and agonize over it as long as we live? Isn’t there any
-statute of limitation in things spiritual? I don’t believe any
-large mind dwells on its sins, any more than on its virtues! And
-yet,” he ended, suddenly cooling, “I swear it is a difficult
-question, the telling or not telling the girl you are going to
-marry.”
-
-“If you bring it down to expediency, it’s simple enough,” Gifford
-Woodhouse said; “it was obviously inexpedient. Even if she had
-married him, and simply remembered, would either of them have been
-any better off? Would any end have been subserved by putting such
-painful knowledge on her conscience as well as his own? It was
-not as though there was a lady ‘with nine small children and one
-at the breast’ somewhere round the corner in the Past, who might
-turn up some day. That sort of sin affects the relation of the
-man and woman, and it may be simple prudence to confess. Though I
-think there is a question, even there. But in this case expediency,
-you might even call it unselfishness, would make him hold his
-tongue. The only thing is, perhaps there is something higher than
-expediency?”
-
-They had reached Mr. Paul’s door; he pitched his cigar into the
-street and pulled out his keys, shaking them on the end of their
-chain.
-
-“You mean, abstractly, is it right or wrong, under circumstances
-like these, where no third person is to be cleared or benefited, to
-tell? Does honor demand confession?”
-
-“Yes,” said the vestryman; “was it a duty to speak, or a duty to be
-silent?”
-
-There was a moment’s silence.
-
-“Was West a fool or a saint?” insisted the younger man.
-
-“I’ll be hanged if I know,” said the senior warden.
-
-
-
-
-THE HOUSE OF RIMMON
-
-
-I
-
-THE Rev. Silas Eaton was dead.
-
-It was May, and the little orchard behind the parsonage was like a
-white and perfumed cloak flung on the shoulder of a bare hillside
-which was, all the rest of it, rocky pasture. Under the trees, and
-in the shelter of the stone walls, the grass was growing green. The
-apple blossoms were just beginning to fall; in any breath of wind
-single petals, white, stained outside with crimson, came down in
-flurries, like gusts of warm and aromatic snow. There was a stir
-of life everywhere. In the parsonage garden crown imperials had
-pushed their strong stalks through the damp earth, and peonies were
-reaching up long slender arms, each with its red curled fist of
-leaves, reluctant to expand until certain of the sun. The ground
-was spongy beneath the foot, and there were small springs bubbling
-up under every winter-bleached tuft of last year’s grass. The air,
-full of the scent of earth and growing things, was warm and sweet,
-yet with an edge of cold--the sword of frost in a velvet scabbard.
-
-Life--life: and in the upper chamber of the parsonage the master
-lay dead.
-
-One of the children had put a bunch of apple blossoms on the table
-at the head of the bed. They were not appropriate--the soft, rosy
-flowers beside the hard face there on the pillow; the face with its
-thatch of gray hair over the narrow, domelike brow, seamed and cut
-with wrinkles; the anxious, melancholy lips set in such icy and
-eternal indifference--the face of the religious egotist, stamped
-with inexorable sincerity, stern and cold and mean. Not a father’s
-face. But his daughter had put her handful of snowy flowers on the
-pine table, their little gnarled black stems thrust tightly down
-into a tumbler of water. And then she went tiptoeing out of the
-silent room. She heard her mother’s little, light voice downstairs
-in the parlor, and Elder Barnes’s low, respectful murmur in
-response. They were “making the arrangements.” Esther’s heart stood
-still, not with grief, but with misery at the strangeness of it
-all--her silent, meek, obedient mother saying what should or what
-should not happen to--father!
-
-“And, Mr. Barnes, if it will not be a trouble, will you find out
-for me how much it would cost to send a telegram to my brother in
-Mercer?”
-
-Esther, leaning over the banisters in the upper hall, opened her
-lips with astonishment. A telegram! It gave the child a sense of
-the dreadful importance of this May day as nothing else had done.
-The thought of the expense of it came next, sobering that curious
-sense of elation which is part of bereavement.
-
-“Mother oughtn’t to do that. It will cost--oh, it will cost at
-least a dollar!”
-
-This fifteen-year old Esther had a certain grim practicality, born
-of a childhood in a minister’s family on five hundred dollars
-a year. A dollar! And that uncle in Mercer, whom she had never
-seen, who had quarreled with her mother because she married her
-father, and who was so rich and powerful (according to a newspaper
-paragraph she had once read)--this uncle, who had had no connection
-with them in all these years--what was the use of wasting a dollar
-in telegraphing him? She meant to say so; and yet, when she went
-downstairs, after Elder Barnes had gone, and found her little
-mother standing at the window, looking blankly out at the garden,
-there was something in the mild, faded face that kept the girl
-silent. She came up and put her strong young arm about her, and
-kissed her softly.
-
-“Mother, won’t you lie down?”
-
-“No, dear; I am not tired. Mr. Barnes has been very kind in telling
-me what must be done. I do hope everything will be as--_he_ would
-wish.”
-
-They did not speak for a little while, and then Esther said, in a
-low voice, “Mother, I don’t want to worry you, and--and perhaps
-it’s very soon to speak of it, but have you thought at all of what
-is going to become of us?”
-
-Her mother put up her hand with a sort of shiver. “No, no; not
-yet. We mustn’t talk of that yet. Oh, Esther, he is dead! Poor
-Silas--poor Silas!” She caught her breath like a child, and looked
-up at her tall daughter in a frightened way.
-
-Esther nodded and cried a little; then she wiped her eyes, and
-said, hesitating: “You’re going to get a crêpe veil, aren’t you,
-mother, and a black dress? And I think I ought to have a black
-dress.”
-
-“We haven’t any money for new clothes, Essie,” Mrs. Eaton answered
-tremulously.
-
-“But I think we ought to wear black,” Esther protested. “It isn’t
-proper not to.”
-
-The other sighed with anxiety. “I don’t see how we can. He would
-not wish us to waste the money.”
-
-They were very intimate, these two; for each had found the other a
-shelter from the fierce integrity which had ruled the family life.
-And now instinctively they nestled together, panting and chirping
-like two frightened birds, and saying to each other, “_He_ would
-wish this, or that.”
-
-But he was dead, and the face of life was suddenly changed to them
-both. The withdrawal of the dominant righteous will of husband
-and father made an abrupt silence in their lives--a silence which
-was as overwhelming in its way as grief. To the mother it was as
-though having been borne helplessly along on some powerful arm,
-she had been suddenly set down on her own feet, and bidden to lead
-and carry others. Esther’s frightened question, “What is going
-to become of us?” echoed in her ears like a crash of bewildering
-sound. She had no answer; all she knew was that she must take care
-of the children; work for them; fight for them--poor little weak
-creature!--if necessary. She was thirty-five, this mother, but she
-looked much older. Once she must have been pretty; one knew that
-by the startled softness of her hazel eyes and the delicately cut
-pale lips; but her forehead, rounded like a child’s, was worn
-and full of lines, and her whole expression so timid and anxious
-and deprecating that one only thought of what her life must have
-been to cut so deep a stamp on such gentle and vague material.
-It had been, since her marriage, a very uneventful life, its
-keenest excitement the making both ends meet on her husband’s
-salary. Before that there had, indeed, been the keen and exciting
-experience of marrying in opposition to her father’s command, and
-being practically disowned by her people. She was Lydia Blair, a
-girl of good family, gentle and dutiful, as girls were expected
-to be thirty years ago--one of those pleasant girls who let
-their elders and betters think for them, and are loved as one
-loves comfortable and inanimate things. And then, suddenly, had
-appeared this harsh, fiery, narrow New England minister, of another
-denomination, of another temperament--for that matter, of another
-class; and she had developed a will of her own and married him.
-Why? Everybody who knew her asked, “Why?” Perhaps afterwards she
-herself asked why--afterwards, when he became so intent upon saving
-his own soul that he had no time to win his children’s love or to
-make love to his wife. By the time he came to die, very likely he
-had forgotten he ever had made love to her. He called her “Mrs.
-Eaton,” and he was as used to her as he was to his battered old
-desk or his worn Bible. But when he came to die, he lay in his bed
-and watched her as he had not done these fifteen years; and once
-he said, when she brought him his medicine, “You’ve been a good
-wife, Mrs. Eaton;” and once, “You’re very kind, Lily.” But this was
-at the end, and the doctor said his mind was wandering. And then
-the end had come, in the spring night, towards dawn; and now he
-was lying still, as indifferent to the soft weather, the shower of
-apple blossoms, the two children whispering about the house, the
-wife staring, dry-eyed, out into the sunshine--as indifferent as he
-always had been.
-
-Well, well; he was a good man, they said; and now he had gone to
-find the God whom he had defamed and vilified under the name of
-religion, imputing to Him meanness and cruelty and revenge--the
-passions of his own poor human nature.
-
-And may that God have mercy on his soul!
-
-
-II
-
-Robert Blair came into the dining-room, holding the “dollar
-telegram” in his hand. His wife looked up at him, smiling.
-
-“It is really shameful the way business pursues you! I am going to
-tell Samuel to burn all dispatches that come here. Your office is
-the place for those horrid yellow papers.”
-
-“It isn’t business this time, Nellie; it’s death.”
-
-“Oh, Robert!”
-
-“Oh,” he hastened to explain, “it’s nothing that touches us. My
-sister Lydia’s husband is dead. You have heard me speak of my
-sister Lydia, haven’t you? It was long before your day, you baby,
-that she married him. Ah, well, what a pretty girl she was!” He
-sat down, shook his head when the man offered him some soup, and
-opened his napkin thoughtfully. “Well, he’s dead. He was a most
-objectionable person”--
-
-Mrs. Blair looked at the butler’s back as he stood at the
-sideboard, and raised her eyebrows; but her husband went on, a
-wrinkle like a cut deepening on his forehead:--
-
-“My father forbade it--did I never tell you about it?--but Lydia,
-who had always been a nonentity, suddenly acquired a will, and
-married him. My father never forgave her. She evidently didn’t care
-for any affection that didn’t include him, and cut herself off from
-all of us. Of course I’m sorry for her now; but I don’t feel that
-I have anything to reproach myself with.” He tapped the table with
-impatient fingers, and told the butler that he didn’t want his
-claret _boiled_. “Haven’t you any sense, Samuel? You’re a perfect
-fool about wine; here, throw that out of the window, and get me a
-fresh bottle!”
-
-Mrs. Blair was a beautiful young woman, who, two years before, had
-married this irascible, successful, dogmatic man, and (so Mercer
-said) could wind him round any one of her pretty jeweled fingers
-whenever she wanted to. He certainly was very much in love--and so
-was she, though her particular world never believed it, alleging
-that she was not indifferent to the loaves and fishes.
-
-But the fact was Mrs. Blair took the loaves and fishes with a
-childlike delight which meant appreciation, certainly, but not
-avarice. She enjoyed her wealth, and her life, and herself,
-immensely and openly; and that was her charm to her husband, a
-man immersed in large affairs, sagacious, powerful, and without
-imagination. He was a cultivated man, because his forbears had been
-educated people, of sober, comfortable wealth; hence he had gone
-to college, like other young men of his class, and had traveled,
-and had acquired an intellectual, or rather a commercial knowledge
-of Art. But, until he married, every instinct was for power, and
-the making of money. After that, though the guiding principle
-remained the same, a sense of beauty did awaken in him. He never
-flagged in his fierce and joyous and cruel passion for getting;
-but he delighted in his wife--perhaps as one of his own enormous
-machines might have delighted in a ray of sunlight dancing across
-its steel shafts, and flickering through the thunderous whir of its
-driving-wheel. He loaded the girl he married with every luxury;
-almost immediately she found she had nothing left to desire--from
-dogs to diamonds, houses, yachts, or pictures. She, poor child,
-realized no deprivation in seeing every wish fulfilled, and
-thought herself the luckiest and the happiest woman in the world.
-Her money, combined with a good deal of common-sense, gave her
-the power to interfere helpfully in the lives of less fortunate
-people. She called it Philanthropy, and found playing Providence
-to the halt, the maimed, and the blind a really keen interest. Her
-impulse was always to “manage”; and so, when her husband, frowning,
-and perhaps a little less satisfied with himself than usual,
-began to talk about his sister’s affairs, Mrs. Blair was instantly
-interested.
-
-“Of course her husband’s death will make a difference in her
-income?” she said, as they went upstairs to the library. “A country
-minister’s salary doesn’t amount to much anyhow; but”--
-
-“Well, she made her bed,” he interrupted sharply; “she ought to be
-willing to lie in it!”
-
-“Oh, yes, of course; but now the man is dead, it’s different. I
-know you want to do something for her, you are so generous.”
-
-He pulled her pretty ear at that, and told her she was a flattering
-little humbug. “What do you want, diplomat? You’ll bankrupt me
-yet. Am I to build a palace for Lily? Look here, I wrote that West
-Virginia college president to-day and told him I’d give him the
-money he wanted. It’s all your doing, but I get the name of a great
-educator.”
-
-“Oh, Robert, how good you are! I think that ought to silence the
-people that say you ‘grind the face of the poor.’ I saw that in the
-paper to-day. Beasts! and you are so generous! I tell you what
-I want: I want you to have them come here, your sister and the
-children”--
-
-“You angel!” he said. “No; that’s dangerous. We mightn’t like the
-brats. The boy’s name is Silas. I don’t think I could stand a cub
-named Silas. But the girl wouldn’t be so bad. As for Lily (we
-used to call her Lily when she was a girl), she is one of those
-gentle, colorless women, all virtue and no opinions, whom anybody
-could live with. Rather a fool, you know. But we’ll have them come
-and make us a visit, if it won’t bore you. If we like it, we can
-prolong it. Anyhow, I’ll see that poor Lil has a decent income. You
-know, my father didn’t leave her a cent. The old gentleman said he
-wouldn’t have ‘that hell-fire Presbyterian use any of his money for
-his damned heathen!’ But I’ll look after her now.”
-
- * * * * *
-
-Thus it was that a home was prepared for Silas Eaton’s widow;
-the offer of it came the day after the funeral, when she sat
-down to face the future. She had gone over her assets, in her
-halting, feminine way, counting up the dollars on her fingers, and
-subtracting the debts with a stubby lead-pencil on the back of an
-old envelope; and she had discovered that when all the expenses of
-the funeral were paid she would have in the bank one hundred and
-seventy-five dollars. If she could manage to sell her husband’s
-very limited library, she might add a few dollars to that sum; but
-very few.
-
-One hundred and seventy-five dollars! She must go to some city, and
-go to work, so that Silas and Esther might be educated. She had
-got as far as that when her brother’s letter came. He would have
-come himself, he said, but was detained by an annoying strike in
-one of his rolling-mills, and so wrote to ask her to come, with the
-children, and visit him for a little while; “then we’ll see what
-can be done; but don’t worry about ways and means. I will see to
-all that.”
-
-She read the straightforward, kindly words, her heart beating so
-she could scarcely breathe. Then she covered her face with her
-hands, and trembled with excitement and relief. “Oh,” she said,
-“the children won’t be poor! Robert will take care of us.”
-
-
-III
-
-When Mrs. Eaton went to Mercer, the change in her life was absolute
-and bewildering. Robert Blair’s enormous wealth was, at first,
-simply not to be realized. The subdued and refined magnificence
-of the house conveyed nothing to his sister’s mind, because she
-had no standard of value. The pictures and tapestries implied not
-money, but only beauty and joy, for she had never dreamed of buying
-anything but food and clothes; so how could she guess that all the
-money of all her sixteen years on a minister’s salary would not
-have purchased, say, the small misty square of canvas that held in
-one corner a wonderful and noble and peasant name?
-
-The first night in the great wainscoted dining-room, with a man
-bringing unknown dishes to her elbow, with candles shining on
-elaborate and useless pieces of silver, with the glow of firelight
-flickering out from under a superb chimney-piece of Mexican marble,
-and dancing about the stately and dignified room--the beauty
-and the graciousness and the wonder of it was an overwhelming
-experience, though she had not the dimmest idea of the fortune it
-represented--a fortune notorious and envied the land over. That she
-had had no share in it until now did not wound her in the least;
-she was grateful for the warmth and the comfort and the kindness,
-now they had come; she never harked back to the painful years of
-silence and forgetfulness.
-
-Her brother and his wife watched her, amused and interested; her
-dazzled admiration of everything was half touching, half droll. But
-what a confession it was! Eleanor Blair realized this, and she said
-to herself, warmly, that she would make up to Robert’s sister for
-the past. She was in her element in arranging her sister-in-law’s
-future; she made a dozen plans for her in the first week; but her
-husband laughed and shook his head.
-
-“Wait,” he said; “time enough when we see how we get along.”
-
-But they got along very well. The children, after the first shy
-awkwardness had worn off, were really attractive. Silas, an
-eager brown-eyed boy of eleven, lovable in spite of his name,
-made artless and pretty love to his pretty aunt, who found him a
-delightful plaything. “The serious Esther,” as her uncle called
-her, was a friendly little creature, when one came to know her; her
-common-sense commended her to Mr. Blair, and her dressmaking and
-her education were an immediate interest to her aunt.
-
-So it came about that the visit was prolonged, and the project of a
-little establishment of her own for Mrs. Eaton gradually given up;
-at all events, for the present. It was very satisfactory as it was.
-The house was so big, they were not in the way; and Mrs. Eaton’s
-mourning kept her in the background in regard to society--which
-“was just as well,” Mrs. Blair admitted, smiling to herself--but
-it made no difference in her usefulness. She was really quite
-useful in one way or another; she could write an intelligent note
-to a tradesman, or reply (by formula) to a begging letter; so, by
-and by, she was practically her sister-in-law’s secretary, and
-certainly the Blairs had never had either a maid or a butler who
-could begin to arrange flowers for a dinner party as Mrs. Eaton
-did. She was silent, and rather vague, but always gentle, and ready
-and eager to fetch and carry for anybody. She so rarely expressed
-any opinion of her own, that when she did the two strong and
-good-natured people who made her life so easy for her could hardly
-take it seriously. She did, to be sure, decline to change her son’s
-objectionable name, on the ground that it was his name, and so
-could not be changed; “and,” Mrs. Blair complained once, “she won’t
-let me send Esther to dancing-school. I asked her if she thought
-dancing was wrong, and she said, ‘Oh, no; but Mr. Eaton did.’ Isn’t
-it funny?”
-
-Robert Blair laughed, and said he would straighten that out. But,
-somehow, it was not straightened out. Esther teased, and Mrs.
-Blair was just a little impatient and sarcastic. But Esther did not
-go to dancing-school.
-
-“I’m sorry to displease you, Eleanor,” Mrs. Eaton said, shrinking
-as she spoke, like a frightened animal which expects a blow,
-“but--I can’t allow it. Mr. Eaton would not have wished it.”
-
-Yet, negative as she seemed, the little quiet woman was keenly
-alive to the advantages of this full, rich life for the children,
-and, indeed, for herself. Mere rest was such a luxury to her, for
-she had lived and worked as only a country minister’s wife must.
-So, to feel no anxiety, to have delicate food, to know the touch
-of fine linen,--in fact, to be comfortable, meant more to her
-than even her brother, enjoying his generosity towards her, could
-possibly imagine.
-
-So life began for his sister and her children in Robert Blair’s
-beautiful great house in the new part of Mercer,--the new part
-which is not offended by the sight of those great black chimneys
-roaring with sapphire and saffron flames, or belching monstrous
-coils of black smoke, threaded with showers of sparks,--those
-chimneys and roofs which are not beautiful to look upon, but which
-have made the “new” part of Mercer possible. When Mrs. Eaton came
-to her brother’s house, these unlovely foundations of his fortune
-were still for a month. There was a strike on, and Mercer was
-cleaner and quieter than it had been for many months,--in fact,
-than it had been since the last strike. The clang and clamor of the
-machine-shops, the scream of the steel saws biting into the living,
-glowing rails, the thunderous crash of plates being tested in the
-hot gloom of the foundries, had all stopped.
-
-“And, oh dear me,” said Mrs. Blair, “what a relief it is! Of course
-it’s very annoying to have them strike, and all that, but when one
-drives into town to get to the other side of the river, the noise
-is perfectly intolerable. And when the wind is in that direction,
-we can really hear the roar even out here.”
-
-She said this to her clergyman, who looked at her with a veiled
-sparkle of humor in his handsome eyes.
-
-“So the puddlers shall starve to make a Mercer holiday,” he said
-good-naturedly.
-
-“If they choose to strike, they must take the consequences,” she
-replied, with some spirit. “Besides, they are the most ungrateful
-creatures! Well, I’m sure I don’t know what we’re coming to!”
-
-“Something may be coming to us,” her visitor said, with a whimsical
-look, but he sighed, and got up to take his leave. His charming
-parishioner sighed too, prettily, and said with much feeling,--
-
-“Of course, Mr. West, if there are any cases that need help, you’ll
-let me know.”
-
-“But, Nellie,” said Mrs. Eaton, who had been sitting silent, as
-usual, and quite overlooked by the other two, “is there any use in
-helping the people who are in trouble because they are out of work,
-and yet not letting them go to work?”
-
-Mrs. Blair laughed, in spite of herself, the protest was so
-unexpected, and so absurd, coming from this meek source. “My dear,”
-she said, “you don’t understand; they can go to work if they want
-to.”
-
-“Well,” Mrs. Eaton said anxiously, “I should think, either they are
-wrong, and so you shouldn’t help them, or they are right, and they
-ought to get what they want.”
-
-Her sister stared at her, and then laughed again, greatly amused;
-but William West put on his glasses and gave her a keen look.
-
-“Mrs. Eaton, don’t you want to help us on the Organized Relief
-Association?”
-
-“Yes, sir,” said Lydia Eaton, “if there’s anything I can do.”
-
-“I don’t want to steal your services away from any other parson,”
-he said pleasantly. “I suppose you belong to Mr. Hudson’s flock?
-You are a Presbyterian, of course?”
-
-“No, sir, I am not,” she said, the color rising in her face.
-
-“Oh, then you do belong to me?” he said smiling.
-
-“I’m not an Episcopalian,” she answered, with a frightened look.
-
-“Then what on earth are you?” Mrs. Blair asked her, laughing.
-
-“I’m not--anything,” she said, her voice trembling; “but, Eleanor,
-please don’t speak of it. The children must not know it. Mr. Eaton
-would want them to be members of his church. So we must always go
-there.”
-
-There was an instant’s awkward pause. Mrs. Blair looked very
-disapproving.
-
-“Why, Lydia,” she said, “do you mean you don’t believe things? Why,
-I never had a doubt in my life!” she exclaimed, turning to the
-minister, who was silent.
-
-Mrs. Eaton caught her breath, and looked at him too, her mild eyes
-full of pain. “Nobody ever asked me before. I am sorry, but I can’t
-help it. The Bible says people go to hell; but God is good, so
-I don’t believe the Bible. But Mr. Eaton would wish me to go to
-church.”
-
-The perfectly simple logic, so primitive as to stop at “the Bible
-says,” was irresistibly funny; yet, to William West, infinitely
-touching. But he put the discussion aside quietly.
-
-“So you will come on our committee?” he said. “We shall be glad to
-have you.”
-
-But when he went away he laughed a little to himself. “The iron
-heel of Edwards, I suppose. But how direct! Two and two make four.
-She is incapable of understanding that they sometimes make five.”
-
-But Mrs. Blair did not dismiss it so lightly. She was annoyed at
-the protest about the strikers, and that impelled her to straighten
-out Mrs. Eaton’s religious beliefs. There was some irritation in
-her voice as she began, but she was in earnest, and stopped in the
-middle of “proofs” to tell Samuel to say she was “not at home.”
-
-“But, Eleanor, you are,” Mrs. Eaton protested in a frightened way.
-
-“My dear, that is a form of speech.”
-
-“But it makes Samuel tell a lie,” she said nervously.
-
-“Oh, Lily, don’t be silly,” Mrs. Blair said impatiently, and then
-jumped from hell to the strikers,--though, as it happened, the
-distance between them was not so great after all. “Really, now,
-Lydia, I don’t think you ought to speak as you did before Mr. West
-about the men. In the first place, business isn’t philanthropy, and
-Robert can’t give in to them. And in the second place, they are
-behaving outrageously! I should think you would have more loyalty
-to Robert than to seem to uphold them.”
-
-“I only meant”--Mrs. Eaton began breathlessly.
-
-“Oh, my dear, you don’t know what you mean,” Mrs. Blair
-interrupted, laughing and good-natured again. “But just remember,
-will you, how kind Robert is? It seems to me he is always doing
-things for this ungrateful place. Look at the fountain in the
-square; that’s the last thing.”
-
-“But wouldn’t the men rather have had running water in the
-tenements?” Mrs. Eaton said; “there are only hydrants down in the
-back yards.”
-
-However, as that first year in Mercer slipped by, there were very
-few such jars. The strike ended early in the fall, and there was
-nothing to call out any objectionable opinion from Mrs. Eaton on
-that line.
-
-“As for Lydia,” Robert Blair said once, “you say ‘go,’ and she
-goeth. She has absolutely no will of her own.”
-
-This was, apparently, quite true. At all events, she had a genius
-for obedience, and a terror of responsibility. In the organized
-relief-work which Mrs. Blair’s clergyman had proposed, obedience
-necessitated responsibility sometimes, and no one knew how the
-silent little creature suffered when she had to decide anything.
-But she did decide, usually with remarkable but very simple
-common-sense.
-
-“And always on the supposition that two and two make four,” Mr.
-West said to himself. He found her literalness a little aggravating
-just at first, but it was very diverting. He used to put on his
-glasses and watch her anxious face when she talked to him or
-received his orders (for such his requests or suggestions seemed
-to her); and he would ask her questions to draw out her astounding
-simplicity and directness of thought, and find her as refreshing as
-a child. She used to sit up before him, saying, “Yes, sir,” and
-“No, sir,” and looking, with her startled eyes, like a little gray
-rabbit--for at the end of a year she took off her black dress, and
-wore instead soft grays that were very pretty and becoming. Her
-absolute literalness gave him much entertainment; but she never
-knew it. If she had guessed it, she would have been humbly glad to
-have been ridiculous, if it had amused him.
-
-And so the first year and a half went by.
-
-
-IV
-
-It was the next winter that she asked her first question.
-
-“Mr. West,” she said, after making notes of this or that case that
-needed looking after (for she was practically visitor for St. James
-now),--“Mr. West, I would like to ask you something.”
-
-“Do, my dear Mrs. Eaton,” he answered heartily.
-
-“I would like to ask you,” she said, her eyes fixed on his, to lose
-no shade of meaning in his reply, “do you think it would be right
-for one person to live on money that another person had stolen?”
-
-“If they knew it was stolen, of course not!” he said, smiling. “Has
-a pickpocket offered to go halves with you?”
-
-“No, sir,” she answered, so gravely that her listener’s eyes
-twinkled. She made no explanation, but went away with a troubled
-look. The next time she saw him she had another question:--
-
-“But suppose the person who lived on the money the other person
-stole needed it very much. Suppose they hadn’t anything else in the
-world. Suppose their children hadn’t anything else. Would it be
-their business to ask where it came from, Mr. West?”
-
-“If it was their business to spend it, it would be,” he told her.
-“Oh, my dear lady, the question of complicity is a pretty big one!”
-He sighed, thinking how little she realized that she was guessing
-at the riddle of the painful earth.
-
-Again she went away, her face falling into lines of care. But
-William West never thought of the matter again. Indeed, he had no
-time to think of his quiet almoner; those were alarming days in
-Mercer. The echoes of that storm which shook not only the town, but
-the very State and nation, are still rolling and muttering in the
-dark places of the land.
-
-Another strike had begun in October. As for the deep and
-far-reaching causes, the economic and industrial necessities, the
-vast plans of organizations and trusts, they have no place in
-this statement of the way in which one ignorant woman regarded
-their effects--a woman living quietly in her brother’s house,
-doing her work, expending her little charities, trying to relieve
-the dreadful misery of those wintry days, with about as much
-success as a child who plays beside some terrific torrent and
-tries to dam it with his tiny bank of twigs and pebbles. Robert
-Blair’s sister had no economic or ethical theories; she had only
-an anguished heart at the suffering in that dreary mill town, a
-dreadful bewilderment at its contrast with the untouched luxury
-of her brother’s house. That she should find a child in one of
-the tenements dying at its mother’s barren breast, while her own
-children fared sumptuously every day; that a miserable man should
-curse her because her brother was robbing him of work, and warmth,
-and decency, even, while she must bless that same brother for
-what he was giving her, was a dreadful puzzle. As she understood
-the situation, this misery existed because her brother would no
-longer give even fourteen cents an hour to human beings who had to
-stand half naked in the scorch of intense furnaces, reeking with
-sweat, taking a breathless moment to plunge waist deep into tanks
-of cold water; to men who worked where the crash of exploding slag
-or the accidental tipping of a ladle might mean death; to gaunt
-and stunted creatures, hollow-eyed, with bleared and sodden faces,
-whose incessant toil to keep alive had crushed out the look of
-manhood, and left them silent, hopeless, brutish, with only one
-certainty in their stupefied souls: “_men don’t grow old in the
-mills_.” ... That these things should be, while she was clothed
-in soft raiment bought by wealth which these desperate beings
-had helped to create--meant to this ignorant woman that there
-was something wrong somewhere. It was not for her to say what or
-where. She had no ambition to reform the world. She did not protest
-against the “unearned increment,” nor did she have views as to
-“buying labor in the cheapest market.” She did not know anything
-about such phrases. The only thing that concerned her was whether
-she, living on her brother’s money, had any part or lot in the
-suffering about her? She grew nervous and haggard and more distrait
-and literal than ever. She wished she dared lay her troubles before
-the wise, gentle, strong man who, to her, was all that was good and
-great. But it did not seem to her right to criticise her brother
-to his clergyman. She never realized how amusing her simplicity
-might be, laid up against the enormous complexity of the industrial
-question; to her it was only: “If Robert is rich, and doesn’t give
-his workmen enough to live on, are not the children and I stealing
-from the men in living on Robert’s money?”
-
-This little question, applied to the relations of capital and
-labor, is of course absurd; but she asked it all the same, this
-soft, negative, biddable creature. She had gone to take some food
-to a hungry household, and she went away burning with shame because
-she was not hungry! It had been a cold, bright November day; she
-went past one of the silent furnaces along the black cinder path to
-the river-bank, where the flat cones of slag were dumped; some of
-them were still slightly warm.
-
-It was quiet enough here to think: After all, Robert’s money did
-so much good; there was the great fountain in the square, and the
-hospital, and the free night school. And think of what he was doing
-for Essie and Silas! Oh, it surely wasn’t her business to ask why
-he cut the men’s wages down!
-
-There was a flare of sunset flushing the calm blue of the upper
-heavens, and in the river, running black and silent before her, a
-red glow smouldered and brightened. Behind her, and all along the
-opposite bank, the furnaces were still. Oh, the misery of that
-black stillness! If only she could see again the monstrous sheets
-of flame, orange, and azure, bursting with a roar of sparks from
-under the dampers of the great chimneys. It would mean work and
-warmth and food to so many! By some unsuggested flash of memory the
-parsonage garden came swiftly to her mind. It must be lying chill
-in the wintry sunset; she could see the little house behind it,
-with its bare, clean poverty; she wished she were back in it again
-with the two children! The beauty and the luxury of her brother’s
-house seemed suffocating and intolerable; and yet would it feed the
-strikers if she should starve?--the vision of her own destitution
-without her brother’s money was appalling. She sat down on a piece
-of slag, a little faint at the thought. Just then, from down below
-her, on the great heap of refuse, she heard voices.
-
-“Come farther up; they’re hotter higher up,” a woman said shrilly.
-
-Then a miserable little group came clambering over the great cones
-of cooling slag, and a child cried out joyously, “This here one’s
-hot, mammy!”
-
-The woman, catching sight of Robert Blair’s sister, though not
-recognizing her, said harshly:--
-
-“You bet hangman Blair has a fire in his house to-day. Well, thank
-God, he ain’t made no cut in slag, yet; we can get a bit of warmth
-here. I wish he may freeze in his bed!”
-
-Lydia Eaton answered, stammering and incoherent, something about
-the cold weather; and then, she was so overstrained and nervous,
-she burst out crying. “Oh, won’t you please let me give you this?”
-she said, and put some money into the woman’s hand.
-
-She went away, stumbling, because her eyes were blurred with tears,
-and saying to herself,--
-
-“What _shall_ I do?”
-
-She almost ran into Mr. West on Baker Street, and stopped abruptly,
-putting her hands on his arm, and, in her agitation, shaking it
-violently, her whole face convulsed and terrified.
-
-“Tell me--you know; you are good: whose fault is it? Robert’s--for
-all--this?”
-
-He understood instantly, and was very gentle with her.
-
-“My dear Mrs. Eaton, that is a very big question. It isn’t any one
-man’s fault. It seems strange, but the weather in India may be
-the reason we are all so wretched in Mercer. Your brother may be
-forced to make this cut by great laws, which, perhaps, you cannot
-understand.”
-
-“But _we_ go on being warm,” she said, “and it is cold. Oh, those
-little children had to get warm on the slag! Oh, sir, I don’t
-believe the Saviour would have been warm while the children were
-cold!”
-
-She looked at him passionately, abruptly applying the precepts of
-the Founder of his religion.
-
-“Ah, well, you know,” William West said kindly, “this whole matter
-is so enormously complicated”--And then he stammered a little, for,
-after all, how could he explain to this poor little frightened,
-ignorant soul that we have learned how injurious to the race would
-be the literal application of the logic of the Sermon on the Mount?
-Nowadays the disciple is wiser than his master, and the servant
-more prudent than his Lord; we know that to feed the five thousand
-with loaves and fishes, without receiving some equivalent, would be
-to pauperize them. But of course Mrs. Eaton could not be made to
-understand that. The clergyman quieted her, somehow; perhaps just
-by his gentle pitifulness; or else her reverence for him silenced
-her. She did not ask him any more questions; and there was no one
-else to ask, except her brother, and just now it would have been
-hard to find the chance to ask Robert Blair anything.
-
-The strike had slowly involved all the mills owned by a syndicate
-of which he was chairman. He had to go to South Bend, where the
-great smelting furnaces are; he was mobbed there, though with no
-worse results than the unpleasantness of eggs and cabbage stalks;
-still, the wickedness of those dreadful creatures was something
-too awful, Mrs. Blair said, crying with anger and fright over the
-newspaper account. At still another mill town a ghastly box reached
-him, labeled: “Starved by the Blair syndicate.” Robert Blair paled
-and sickened at its contents, but he swore under his breath: “Let
-them starve their brats, if they want to; it isn’t my business.
-There’s work for them if they want it; but the curs would rather
-loaf. This country can go to the devil before I’ll give in to them!”
-
-He did not get back to Mercer until December. “I wouldn’t let the
-fools keep me from you on Christmas,” he told his wife savagely,
-and caught her in his arms with a sort of rage. “Were you very
-lonely? You’ve been nervous--I can see it in your face. You are
-paler!” He ground his teeth; that those brutes should have made her
-paler!
-
-“Of course I was lonely,” she said, smiling, though her eyes were
-bright with tears, “and I’ve been frightened almost to death about
-you, too. Oh, that mob!”
-
-“You little goose; didn’t I tell you there was no danger? I
-always had two detectives. But I used to get anxious about you. I
-telegraphed the mayor to detail an officer to be always about the
-house. Heaven knows what’s going to be the end of this business,
-Nell! Well, sweetheart, may I have some dinner, or must I go and
-dress first?”
-
-“No. You’re dreadfully dusty, but I can’t lose sight of you for a
-moment,” she said gayly. “Robert, I should have died if you hadn’t
-been at home for Christmas!”
-
-His sister and the children met him at the dining-room door--Silas,
-capering about with delight; Esther, prettier than ever, coming to
-hang on his arm, and rub her cheek against his shoulder, and say
-how glad she was to see him.
-
-“Robert, it’s perfectly disgusting,” Mrs. Blair complained, “but a
-delegation insists upon seeing you to-night; they are coming about
-eight.”
-
-“Oh, confound it!” he said frowning; “the strike, of course? A lot
-of parsons meddling with what they know nothing about.”
-
-“There are parsons, I suppose,” she said, “but the mayor is coming.
-Do get rid of them as soon as you can, so that I may have a little
-of you.”
-
-She looked so pretty as she sat at the head of her table,
-beseeching him, that he declared he would kick the delegation out
-if they stayed over ten minutes; then he tossed a small white
-velvet box across the roses in the big silver bowl in the middle of
-the table, and watched her flash of joy as she opened it.
-
-“It seems to me I have some more boxes, somewhere,” he said
-good-humoredly. “There, Essie! if your aunt Eleanor had packed me
-off to get into my dress-suit, I wouldn’t have found this one in my
-pocket. Lydia, you sober old lady, can you wear that? As for you,
-Silas, you don’t want any gewgaws, do you? We fellows think more of
-a bit of paper with three figures on it, hey?”
-
-“There! there’s the bell. It’s your horrid delegation,” Mrs. Blair
-cried. “Just let them wait till you finish dinner. And do get rid
-of them quickly. Mr. Hudson, Lydia’s minister, will be there; tell
-him to wait a minute when the others have gone. I want to speak to
-him.”
-
-“I thought little Hudson had more sense,” Robert Blair grumbled,
-rising and going into the library to meet a dozen of his
-fellow-citizens, some of them men with grave and startled faces,
-who from pity for the three thousand fools who were turning Mercer
-upside down, and from good-humored interest in the affairs of their
-powerful townsman, were beginning to feel the sting of personal
-alarm about their own concerns.
-
-These men were saying to each other what the newspapers had been
-saying for two months, that Robert Blair, for vanity or obstinacy
-or greed, was bringing alarming disaster not merely upon a few
-thousand desperate and hungry and unreasonable puddlers, but upon
-the respectable well-to-do business population of his city.
-
-“And he’s got to stop it!” the mayor said angrily.
-
-“It would be a good job if somebody would blow him up with
-dynamite,” said the Baptist deacon, who was the wealthiest
-merchant in town. “He’ll swamp us all, if we don’t look out.”
-
-As for the clergyman, he looked very miserable, for he had the
-expenses of his church and his own salary in mind, and between
-offending Mr. Blair and not protesting against the continuance of
-the strike, the poor little man was between the devil and the deep
-sea.
-
-“Gentlemen,” said Robert Blair, calm and hard (“as nails,” the
-Baptist deacon said), “I appreciate the honor of your call, and I
-hope I have listened with proper courtesy and patience to what you
-had to say; but allow me to call your attention to certain facts
-which seem to contradict your assertions that you suspect that I
-am not acting for the public good in this matter of the strike.
-Mr. Mayor, if my wealth had been gained by the subversion of law
-and order, as you suggest, I am sure you could not have accepted
-any of it for your campaign--ah--_expenses_. For you, Mr. Davis, a
-church member, a deacon, if I mistake not, I need only remind you
-of your willingness to borrow, I will not say how many thousands,
-as the basis of your most successful business (though I would not
-be thought to underrate your own prudence and economy in paying
-your women clerks a little less than they can live on). And as
-for my worthy friend here, the Rev. Mr. Hudson, if my money were,
-as he has so delicately implied, ‘blood-money,’ I cannot think he
-would have accepted the contribution I had the privilege of making
-towards the alterations of his church. Gentlemen, you have felt
-it your duty to remonstrate with me upon my way of making money;
-so long as you are content to spend that money, I cannot believe
-that your remonstrances are based upon anything else than the
-inconvenience to yourselves of certain exigencies which I deeply
-regret, but which result from methods which commend themselves to
-me, and which, I observe, you apply in your own concerns: you all
-pay as little as you can for what you want; I pay as little as I
-can for labor. For your particular request that I submit to the
-demands of the strikers, I can only say that when Mr. Davis will
-give away in charity the fortune built upon the outcome of those
-methods; when his honor the Mayor will refund the--ah--_expenses_
-of his recent successful campaign and call it conscience-money;
-when the Rev. Mr. Hudson will give up improving his church--in
-fact, when you will all consent to buy your shirts or your potatoes
-in the dearest market--I will consent to alter the methods whereby
-I have had the honor of serving you. We will all reduce together.
-When we can do that, I will recognize a moral issue, as Mr. Hudson
-so admirably expresses it. Until then I will try to mind my own
-business. If it were not perhaps discourteous, I would recommend
-a like course of action to this committee. Gentlemen, I bid you
-good-evening.”
-
-He was pale with rage. He forgot his wife’s message to the
-minister; he bowed, and stood with folded arms watching the
-withdrawal of the humiliated and angry delegation, “with their
-tails between their legs,” the little clergyman said to himself,
-stung by the impudent injustice of it all.
-
-Mr. Blair went into the drawing-room, breathing hard with the
-restraint he had put upon himself, for his coldly insolent words
-had been no outlet to his anger. “Don’t talk about it,” he said
-violently. “I won’t hear another word on the subject. Nell, I
-thought that little Hudson was not entirely a jackass, though he is
-a parson; he had the impertinence to say that ‘Brother West’ agreed
-with him. I don’t believe it! But if it’s true, why, then, West is
-a meddling idiot, like all the rest of these damned self-seeking
-philanthropists.”
-
-“Robert, _dear_! the children,” murmured Mrs. Blair nervously.
-
-His face was dully red, and his blue, fierce eyes cut like knives;
-one felt an unspoken epithet applied to the children, who watched
-him furtively, with frightened glances, and moved about awkwardly,
-speaking to each other in undertones. A moment before, everything
-had been full of charm and graciousness; their pretty aunt sat,
-indolent and graceful, on a yellow sofa, leaning back against some
-ivory-satin cushions, with a great yellow-shaded lamp shining down
-on her delicate dark beauty; the flicker of the fire behind the
-sparkling brass dogs went leaping softly about the room, glowing
-on the walls, which were covered above the white wainscoting with
-yellow damask, on which the candle-light from the high sconces fell
-with a yellow shine; everything was golden and bright and rich, and
-the warm still air was delicate with the scent of violets. Then
-into it burst this violent and angry presence.
-
-There is no embarrassment quite like the embarrassment of listening
-to a person for whom one has a regard making a fool of himself.
-Nobody spoke. Robert Blair tramped up and down, kicked a little
-gilded stool half across the room, caught his foot in a rug,
-stumbled, and then swore. Mrs. Blair’s fox-terrier, Pat, shrunk
-under a table and looked at him, trembling.
-
-“Silas,” said Mrs. Eaton, “you and Esther must go upstairs.”
-
-“The trouble is,” said her brother to his wife, “these men don’t
-know what they are talking about; they don’t know anything about
-the market; they don’t know anything about the necessities of
-trade; all they know is their dividends; if _they_ were cut,
-there’d be a howl! But they presume to dictate to us; to tell us
-the money is blood-money; all the same, they are ready enough to
-spend it on their own carcasses!”
-
-Mrs. Eaton had closed the door on her children, and came and stood
-by a little silver-cluttered table, under the big yellow lamp. “I
-think Robert is quite right,” she said.
-
-The approval of this mild creature was like an edge laid against
-the tense thread of Robert Blair’s anger. He burst into a laugh.
-
-“Bless your heart, Lydia, I didn’t know you were in the room. Well,
-my dear, I’m glad you approve of me.”
-
-“I don’t, brother.”
-
-“Oh, you don’t? Where are the chicks? Sent them out of the room
-because I used bad words? Well, I oughtn’t to swear in the
-drawing-room, that’s a fact. _Place aux Dames!_ But after all, I
-only dropped the ‘_place_.’”
-
-“Oh!” his wife said; and then, “you are very naughty;” and pouted,
-and pulled him down on his knees beside her.
-
-“I thought it was very natural to be angry at the rug,” Mrs. Eaton
-said breathlessly; “I’ve often felt like speaking that way myself”--
-
-“Do, Lydia, do!” Mr. Blair interrupted, with a laugh.
-
-“--but Mr. Eaton would never have allowed the children to hear,
-and”--
-
-“Come, now! Haven’t I apologized? Don’t rub it in. I’ll give you
-something extra to put in the plate on Sunday, because I did pitch
-into your man Hudson like the devil! I told him so long as he spent
-‘blood-money’ for his darned improvements, he couldn’t reproach me
-for earning it.”
-
-“Oh,” Lydia Eaton said, her hands squeezed together,--“oh, no!
-He is quite different from--me. It is _you_ who are spending
-the--blood-money on the improvements. If he were spending it on
-himself, like--like me, it would be different.”
-
-Her brother looked up at her from his footstool at his wife’s feet,
-first amused, and then bored.
-
-“My dear Lily, I’m sure I don’t know what you are talking about.
-I’m sorry if I stepped on your toes about your parson. He means
-well. Only he is a parson, so I suppose he can’t help being rather
-ladylike in business matters. Do drop the subject; I am sick of the
-whole thing. How is your conservatory, Nell? Are those violets the
-result of your agricultural efforts?”
-
-“I think, Robert,” his sister said in her low voice, that shivered
-and broke, “I must just say one thing more: I must give you back
-this beautiful thing you gave me at dinner. And I must go away with
-the children.”
-
-“What under the sun!” he began, frowning; then he got up and stood
-on the hearth-rug, his back to the fire. “Lydia, I hope you are
-not going to be a fool? What are you talking about? Sit down,--sit
-down! You’re as white as a ghost. Lily, I’m afraid you’re a great
-goose. What’s the matter?” He could not help softening as he looked
-at her. She stood there by the little tottering table, loaded with
-its dozens of foolish bits of silver, so tense and quivering that
-even his impatient eyes could not fail to see her agitation.
-
-“Robert, you have been so kind to us; you are so good to us,--oh, I
-don’t know how I can do it!” she broke into an anguished sob,--“but
-I must. Mr. Eaton would never have let the children be supported on
-money that was not--that was not good.”
-
-There was silence; the clock in the hall chimed ten. Then Eleanor
-Blair, sitting up, pale and angry, said,--
-
-“Well, upon my word!”
-
-Her husband looked at his sister with sudden kindness in his
-eyes. “Lily, you don’t understand. When I said what I did to Mr.
-Hudson,--of course, that has put it into your head,--I didn’t
-really mean it. In the first place, I’m an honest man (I’ll just
-mention that in passing), and it is not your business nor his
-to judge my business methods. It isn’t a pretty thing to look a
-gift-horse in the mouth, Lil.”
-
-“It isn’t what you said to Mr. Hudson,” she answered. “I’ve been
-thinking about it for nearly a year. Robert, you pay them so
-little, and I--I have all this.”
-
-She looked about the beautiful room with a sort of fright: it
-seemed to her that the warm and stately walls hid human misery
-lying close outside,--hunger and hatred, cold and sickness, and the
-terror of to-morrow. The impudent luxury of this enormous wealth
-struck her like a blow on the mouth.
-
-“They,” she said, with a sob, “_are hungry_.”
-
-Her brother, divided between irritation and amusement, was touched
-in spite of himself.
-
-“My dear Lily,” he said, “you can’t understand this thing. To put
-it vulgarly, you’ve bitten off more than you can chew. Look here,
-the men can go to work to-morrow if they want to; but they don’t
-want to. I offer them work, and they can take it or leave it.
-Well, they leave it. It’s their affair, not mine.”
-
-But she shook her head miserably. “I don’t understand it. If you
-were poor, too, it would be different.”
-
-“Well, really!” said Mrs. Blair.
-
-But Robert Blair was wonderfully patient.
-
-“There’s another thing you must remember, Lily; these people are
-far better off on what I am willing to pay them than they were in
-Europe, where most of them came from.”
-
-“But, Robert,” she said passionately, “because they could be worse
-off doesn’t seem to be any reason why they shouldn’t be better off.
-And--_it isn’t kind_.”
-
-“Kind?” Her brother looked at her blankly, and then, with a shout
-of laughter, “Lydia, you are as good as a play! No, my dear; I
-don’t run my mills for kindness.”
-
-“But,” she said, almost in a whisper, “whatsoever ye would that men
-should do unto you”--
-
-Mrs. Blair made a gesture of disgust.
-
-“--oh, brother, I didn’t mean to find fault with you. Only with
-myself. I--I haven’t any right to spend money that I--don’t know
-about.”
-
-“Well, anything more?” Robert Blair said, a little tired of her
-foolishness. “My dear, like the parson, you mean well; but you are
-a great goose!”
-
-As for his wife, she did not even answer Mrs. Eaton’s tremulous
-“good-night.”
-
-
-V
-
-The husband and wife looked at each other; then Robert Blair flung
-his head back with a laugh.
-
-“She is perfectly delicious!”
-
-“She is perfectly ungrateful, and I believe she means it.”
-
-“Oh, nonsense! Lil hasn’t mind enough to mean anything; and I’ll
-tell you another thing: in spite of her quiet ways, she really has
-a good deal of worldly wisdom. She knows what it is to those two
-children to have me interested in them. Don’t worry your little
-head”--
-
-“Oh, I don’t worry,” she answered. “If she is going to presume to
-criticise you, I don’t want her under my roof; the sooner she
-leaves the better!”
-
-“Spitfire!” he told her, kissing her pretty hand, and forgetting
-all about his sister’s absurdity, and the strike, and the men and
-women shivering in the tenements down in the miserable mill town.
-
-But he remembered it all the next morning at the breakfast-table,
-for Lydia Eaton’s white face was too striking to escape comment.
-Mrs. Blair was not present, preferring to be, at what she called
-the “brutal hour of eight,” in her own room, with a tray and her
-maid and a novel.
-
-“What’s the matter?” Mr. Blair said kindly. “Are you ill, Lily?”
-
-“It’s what I told you last night, Robert,” she said nervously.
-
-The solemn Samuel, all ears, but looking perfectly deaf, brought
-a dish to his master’s elbow. Robert Blair closed his lips with a
-snap. Then he said,--
-
-“Please make no reference to that folly before Eleanor.”
-
-But of course it was only a respite. The folly had to be repeated
-to Eleanor--discussed, argued, denounced, until the whole
-atmosphere of the house was charged with excitement.
-
-Through it all Lydia Eaton came and went, and did her packing.
-
-“Well,” her sister-in-law said contemptuously, “perhaps you’ll tell
-me how you mean to _feed_ Esther and Silas? You have a right to
-starve yourself, but I have some feeling for the children!”
-
-“I am going to work,” the other answered, trembling.
-
-“Lydia,” Mrs. Blair said passionately, “next to your ingratitude
-to your brother, I must say your selfishness in ruining your own
-children is the most dreadful thing I ever heard of!”
-
-But Mrs. Eaton’s preparations went on. Not that there was so much
-to do; but she had to find rooms, and then she had to find work. It
-was the latter exigency which fanned Robert Blair’s contemptuous
-annoyance, which refused to take the matter seriously, into sudden
-flames of rage, for his sister saw fit to apply at a shop for the
-position of saleswoman. Of course it came to his ears, and that
-night the storm burst on Mrs. Eaton’s head. As for Robert Blair,
-when the interview was over, during which he spared Mrs. Eaton no
-detail of his furious mortification, he said savagely to his wife:
-“I wish you’d go and see if West cannot bring her to her senses.
-Get him to influence her to some decency. Tell him, if she’s set in
-this outrageous ingratitude, I wish he would persuade her to let me
-send her East, to some other place, and let her work (and starve!)
-where she won’t disgrace me. Think of it, Eleanor--that man Davis
-coming whining and grinning, and saying he ‘would do what he could
-to give my sister a position as saleslady, but I knew the times
-were bad’! Damn him!”
-
-“Good heavens, Robert! You don’t mean to say she’s been to Davis’s?
-My dear, she is insane! Yes, I’ll go and see Mr. West to-morrow.”
-
-She went. It was a raw, bleak morning; the thin, chill winter
-rain blurred the windows of her brougham, and the mud splashed up
-against the glass; the wheels sunk into deep ruts of the badly
-paved streets, and the uncomfortable jolt and sway of the softly
-padded carriage added to her indignation at her sister-in-law.
-
-William West did not live in the new part of Mercer, with its
-somewhat gorgeous houses; nor yet in the old part, which was
-charming and dignified, and inclined to despise everything not
-itself; but in the middle section, near the rows of rotten and
-tumbling tenements, and within a stone’s throw of bleak and hideous
-brick blocks, known as “Company boarding-houses.” He had come here
-to live shortly after a certain crash in his own life; a personal
-blow, which left him harder, and more silent, and more earnest. He
-had been jilted, people said, and wondered why, for a while, and
-then forgot it, as he, absorbed in his work, seemed also to forget
-it.
-
-Mrs. Blair, her fox-terrier under one arm, stepped out of the
-carriage, frowning to find herself in this squalid street; but
-once inside the big, plain, comfortable house where William West
-lived all by himself, her face relaxed and took a certain arch and
-charming discontent; there was a big fire blazing in the minister’s
-library, and the dignity and refinement of the room, the smell
-of leather-covered books, the gleam of pictures and bronzes, and
-a charming bit of tapestry hanging on the chimney-piece restored
-her sense of mental as well as physical comfort. When he entered,
-and dragged a big chair in front of the fire for her, and looked
-at her with that grave attention which seems like homage, and was
-part of the man, being called forth by his washerwoman as well as
-by Mrs. Robert Blair, she felt almost happy again, and assured that
-everything would come out right.
-
-“Mr. West,” she began, “you’ve got to help us; we’re in such absurd
-difficulties! Will you?”
-
-“Command me,” he said, smiling.
-
-“You haven’t heard, then? It’s Lydia--Mr. Blair’s sister, you know.
-She has taken it into her head that”--the color came into Mrs.
-Blair’s face--“that she won’t let Robert support her, because she
-thinks he isn’t treating the strikers properly. I’m sure I don’t
-know what idea she has! But she won’t accept his money. Did you
-ever hear of such a thing?”
-
-William West’s face sobered instantly. “I have not seen Mrs. Eaton
-for a fortnight,” he said; “I had no idea”--He got up, frowning,
-the lines about his lips perplexed and anxious.
-
-“I’m sure,” the pretty woman went on, growing angrier as she
-spoke, “I don’t care what _she_ does,--I’ve lost all patience
-with her,--but to throw the children’s future away! And it’s
-so embarrassing for Robert.” Then she told him fully the whole
-situation. “She keeps saying,” Mrs. Blair ended, “that ‘Mr. Eaton’
-wouldn’t have allowed the children to be supported on money that
-‘_wasn’t good_.’ Did you ever hear such impertinence?”
-
-“Ah, well,” he protested good-naturedly, “I’m sure Mrs. Eaton does
-not mean to be impertinent; and I’m sure she does appreciate her
-brother’s kindness. Only, she is trying to work out a great problem
-on an individual basis, which is of course very foolish. But the
-dear little lady must not be allowed--And yet”--He paused, frowning
-and perplexed.
-
-“Ah, but, Mr. West, when she has the assurance to quote the Bible
-to her own brother--it seems to me that’s rather impertinent?
-Fancy! something about ‘doing unto others’--and ‘being partaker’ if
-she spent the money that had been ‘wrung from the strikers.’ Upon
-my word! ‘Wrung!’ As I said to my husband, ‘Upon my word, I never
-heard of such a thing.’”
-
-“Neither did I,” William West said dryly. “We are all of us in the
-habit of taking our dividends, and not looking at the way they are
-earned. Mrs. Eaton is certainly unusual.”
-
-“Well, do you think you can influence her?” Mrs. Blair insisted. “I
-don’t mean to stay with us; I don’t think that would be possible or
-desirable now. But to let Mr. Blair give her an allowance, so that
-she can take care of the children. It is positively wicked to think
-how she is ruining the children!”
-
-“Won’t she take any money from your husband?”
-
-“Not a cent, if you please! Not a penny. She keeps saying that if
-she can’t feel that the source of the money is all right, she can’t
-spend it.” Mrs. Blair cuffed her dog prettily with her muff, and
-kissed his little sleek head. “Isn’t she a goose, Pat, you darling?”
-
-“Her principle would turn the world upside down,” the clergyman
-said.
-
-“That’s just what I say!” cried Mrs. Blair.
-
-“If we all said we would have nothing to do with the ‘blood of
-the just person,’ what would become of the railroads and the
-coal-mines and the oil trusts? What would become of our dividends
-from industrial stocks if we insisted on knowing that the workmen
-were honestly paid? How could we eat meat, if we looked into the
-slaughter-house?”
-
-Mrs. Blair looked puzzled.
-
-“And she is going to work for her living?” He was profoundly
-moved. “Good heavens, out of the mouths of babes! What a primitive
-expression of social responsibility! But surely, Mrs. Blair, we
-must respect her honesty? As for her judgment, that’s another
-matter.”
-
-Eleanor Blair’s blank astonishment left her speechless for a
-moment; then she flung up her head haughtily.
-
-“Mr. West, do you mean to say”--she began.
-
-“My dear Mrs. Blair,” he said quietly, “I mean to say that little
-Mrs. Eaton, in her simple way, puts her finger right on the centre
-of this whole miserable question, in which, directly or indirectly,
-we are all involved: she has recognized our complicity. Of course
-she is going to work the wrong way--at least, I suppose she is. God
-knows! But what courage,--what directness!”
-
-“Do I understand,” Eleanor Blair said, rising, “that you approve of
-my sister-in-law’s extraordinary conduct?”
-
-“I approve of _her_,” he said, smiling. “If you ask me whether I
-think she is doing right, I should say ‘Yes,’ because she is acting
-upon her conscience. Is she doing wisely? No; because civilization
-is compromise. We have either got to bow in the House of Rimmon,
-or go and live in the woods like Thoreau and eat dried peas. I’ll
-tell her so, if you want me to. But as for attempting to influence
-her, I cannot do that. The place whereon we stand is holy ground.”
-
-Mrs. Blair picked up her dog and set her teeth; then she looked
-slightly beyond the clergyman, with half-shut eyes, and said,--
-
-“Will you be good enough to have my carriage called?”
-
-
-VI
-
-“I never would have been brave enough,” Mrs. Eaton said meekly
-to Mr. West, when the dreadful step was actually taken, “I never
-could have done it, but I knew Mr. Eaton would have wished it; and,
-besides, I felt I was taking the food of those poor people.”
-
-“Well, no,” he began, “that is really not reasonable”--But he
-stopped; this timid creature could not reason--she could only feel.
-“Fools,” he said to himself, as he left her, “rush in where the
-political economist fears to tread. She is a fool, poor little
-soul, but”--
-
-The winter had passed heavily away. Mrs. Eaton had succeeded in
-getting a place in Mr. Davis’s shop--“where,” the proprietor used
-to say, “having Robert Blair’s sister for a saleslady is money in
-my pocket! She’s better than a ‘fire-and-water bargain sale.’”
-So she stood behind a counter and sold ribbon, and was stared at
-and whispered about. But she had very keen anxieties about food
-and clothes, and the children’s discontent lay like a weight upon
-the mother’s heart--which ached, too, with the pain of the second
-wrench from the affection and kindness of her family. Fortunately
-her peculiar logic did not lead her to reject the Baptist deacon’s
-money, which was certainly much more doubtful than her brother’s.
-By some mental process of her own, the fact that she worked for it
-seemed to make its acceptance moral. She had no leisure now to work
-for Mr. West; but the remembrance of his patience and gentleness
-always made a little pause of peace in her heavy thoughts. It was
-a hard, bleak life for this silent little creature; and the rector
-of St. James, himself a silent soul, watched her live it, and
-pondered many things.
-
-The strike had broken in February. The men went back to their
-work--defeat, like some bitter wind, blowing the flames of
-resentment into fiercer heat, which “next time” would mean
-destroying victory.
-
-“Will it be like Samson pulling down the temple upon himself?”
-William West wondered, depressed and hopeless.
-
-It was night--a summer night; sweet and still over in the
-old-fashioned part of Mercer, where the fragrance of roses
-overflowed the high brick walls of the gardens. Here in the mill
-district it was not sweet, and all night long the mills roared and
-crashed, and the flames bursting out of vast chimneys flared and
-faded, and flared again.
-
-William West was alone in his library. His sermon for the next
-morning had been finished early in the week; he had looked it over
-the last thing, and now the manuscript was slipped into its black
-velvet cover. He sat, his head on his hand, tapping with strong,
-restless fingers the arm of his chair. The old question, always
-more or less present in the mind of this man, was clamoring for an
-answer: How far are we responsible? Through how many hands must
-dishonest money, cruel money, mean money, pass to be cleansed?
-Is it clean when it comes to me--this dividend or that? Shall a
-man, or a railroad, or a trust deal iniquitously with one of these
-little ones, and I profit by it? Shall I trace my dollar to its
-source, and find it wet with tears and blood, and reject it? Or
-shall I decline to trace it, and buy my bread in innocence? Even
-the chief priests refused the thirty pieces of silver! Am I an
-accomplice? For that matter, is the Christian Church an accomplice?
-What does it say to the philanthropy of thieves? Priests used to
-take toll from the plunder of robbers, and say mass for their souls
-in return. Nowadays--“I cover my eyes, but I hold out my hand,” he
-said to himself.
-
-Well--well! The Reverend William West, in his way, was doubtless
-as great a fool in asking unprofitable questions as was Lydia
-Eaton. That the existing order would be turned upside down by the
-introduction of the sense of personal responsibility there can be
-no doubt. Such an introduction would be the application to the
-complex egotism of the nineteenth century of the doctrines of a
-Galilean peasant, who was a communist and the Saviour of the world.
-It would be the setting forth in individual lives of the spirit of
-Jesus Christ, the most revolutionary element that could possibly be
-introduced into society. We are none of us ready for that.
-
-At least William West was not ready; he had no intention of making
-himself ridiculous, no matter if he did ask himself unanswerable
-questions; he was not ready to throw away present opportunities and
-destroy his influence. Yet, as for Mrs. Eaton--
-
-“Talk about martyrs!” he said to himself, as he sat there at
-midnight thinking of her, of her hard life, of her splendid
-foolishness.
-
-“Well, there is one thing I could do for her. Why not? Good God,
-how selfish I am! I suppose she would think my money was clean?
-Yes, I could at least do _that_.”
-
-This was no new thought. It had been in his mind more or less for
-months. He only faced it that night more strenuously.
-
-So it came about that by and by he rose, his face set, his mouth
-hard. He took a key from his watch chain, and opened a little
-closet in the side of the chimney, and took out a box. He laid it
-on the table, and again sat down in his revolving chair, and stared
-blankly ahead of him. Then he opened it. There were some letters
-in it, and a picture, and a crumbling bunch of flowers that looked
-as though they had once been pansies; he held them in his hand, a
-bitter sort of amusement in his eyes. The letters he put aside,
-as though their touch stung him. At the photograph he looked long
-and intently. Then he bent the card over in his hand, and it broke
-across the middle. Hastily he gathered these things together and
-went over to his fireplace. A fire had been laid during the cold
-spring rains, and the logs were dry and dusty. At the touch of
-a match, they sputtered and broke into a little roaring flame.
-William West put his handful of letters and the flowers and the
-picture gently down in the midst of it, and then stood and watched
-them burn. When there was only a white film left, on which the
-sparks ran back, widening and dying, he went over to his desk,
-and with a certain strong and satisfied cheerfulness he began to
-write:--
-
- MY DEAR MRS. EATON,--You and I have spoken more than once of
- your action in leaving your brother’s house, and you know, I am
- sure, how profoundly I honor and respect your courage in acting
- upon your convictions. It is this respect which I am venturing
- to offer you in asking you to honor me by becoming my wife.
- My sincere regard and appreciation have been yours ever since
- I first knew you, and if you will consent to make a home for
- yourself and the children in my house, it will be a home for
- me, and you know what that will be for a lonely man. If you
- will consent, I shall be always,
-
- Faithfully yours,
- WILLIAM WEST.
-
-As he folded the sheet of paper and thrust it into the envelope
-there was a whimsical look in his eyes.
-
-“A _love_-letter!” he said to himself; but his face was very gentle
-and tender.
-
- * * * * *
-
-However, the answer to the letter was all that the most ardent
-lover could desire.
-
-
-
-
-COUNTING THE COST
-
-
-I
-
-ANNIE GRAHAM, the young woman with whom this story
-concerns itself, lived in a Western manufacturing town. Her home
-was, both inside and outside, like hundreds and thousands of other
-American homes, a cheap frame house, in a cheap, respectable
-suburb; a house without any other beauty or refinement than
-cleanliness and a certain amount of rather coarse comfort. Her
-father was a workingman, as his father had been before him. He
-was a gasfitter, and went to his work every morning with a greasy
-leather bundle under his arm, and a cheerful heart in his breast.
-First, because he had plenty of work and, having no imagination,
-never worried about the future. But mostly because of a comfortable
-fact to which, when not occupied with the practical details of his
-trade, he devoted his thoughts; the fact being that there was a
-certain tidy bit of money in the bank for his Annie,--money which
-he had hoarded up, little by little, saved out of car-fares, and
-tobacco, and clothes; money which meant privation and courage, and
-slow, persistent, heavy toil. It amounted to a little over fifteen
-hundred dollars, and he hoped it would be twenty-five hundred
-before he died. What Annie would do with it when he was gone was
-the only direction in which Johnny Graham’s fancy worked. Would she
-rent a better house, maybe, than this little one they had lived
-in since she was twelve; or would she get herself fine clothes or
-a piano or books? He thought that she would probably get books.
-Annie was so fond of reading! He was very proud of this fondness
-for reading, and used to tell his fellow-workmen about it, and say
-he had seen her turn over so many pages, in fifteen minutes by his
-watch. He timed her, he said, and my! but she was the fast reader!
-He had no idea of placing any restrictions upon the way in which
-she should spend her inheritance when she got it; he had no feeling
-about the money as anything but a means of future pleasure to Annie.
-
-“When I’m dead and gone, the afternoon, maybe, of the funeral,
-they’ll tell her. ‘Annie Graham,’ the lawyer’ll say, ‘your father’s
-left you a tidy bit of money. It’s twenty-five hundred dollars,’
-he’ll say; well, maybe it’ll be twenty-six hundred,--well, say
-three thousand. ‘Miss Graham,’ he’ll say, ‘here’s three thousand
-dollars.’ Well, Annie’ll jump. An’ it’ll comfort her,” Annie’s
-father would think many times a day, smiling, and screwing in his
-gas-fixtures with his blackened fingers, or scratching a match on
-his trousers, and hunting for leaks.
-
-He had been father and mother to his little girl ever since his
-wife died, when Annie was five. He had baked and scrubbed and
-cleaned for them both when she was a child, and in his clumsy way
-he had sewed on buttons and darned rents and washed her little
-face and hands as tenderly as a woman could have done. And when
-she grew into a big girl and went to the grammar school, he still
-knew all about her hats and clothes; and he still tried to save
-her pretty hands, and sifted the ashes, and waited on her, and was
-proud of her just as he always had been. There was more than one
-hard-working woman neighbor who would have been willing to “make
-a good stepmother” to Annie, and who felt, in all honesty, that
-the gasfitter was spoiling his girl, and that she just only hoped
-nothing bad would come of it.
-
-“Them girls that’s taken such care of,--well, the dear only knows
-what happens to them!” the neighbors said, with mysterious pursings
-of the lips. But so far nothing out of the way had happened to
-Annie. Nothing “bad” had come of the simple, faithful loving that
-the child had had.
-
-Annie was eighteen. She was a fresh-looking girl, with an
-intelligent face, though a little serious for her years. Her placid
-gray eyes had a rather absent look sometimes, and there was a line
-on her white forehead that told of thought. Johnny Graham knew
-what that line meant. He knew with what intensity Annie had applied
-herself to her studies when she was in school, and how, after she
-had graduated, and had gotten a place as a “saleslady,” as Johnny
-expressed it, she still worked and toiled over her books whenever
-she could find time.
-
-“But she’s mostly figurin’,” he told his friends proudly.
-
-That Annie, at eighteen, had taught herself geometry, and had
-yearnings for the higher calculus, was a matter of burning pride to
-the gasfitter, though he had no idea what it was all about.
-
-“I suppose now, Annie, you know all there is in the arithmetics
-on them subjects?” he said to her one night as he sat in his
-shirt-sleeves smoking his pipe by the kitchen stove, and looking at
-his daughter, who, with her pencil pressed against her lips, was
-frowning over a sheet of calculations. Annie gave a little start
-and looked up smiling.
-
-“Why, father, dear, I don’t know anything--comparatively.”
-
-“But, Annie, now what’s the good of them lines? Do you cut
-patterns on ’em? I seen a advertisement saying they’d show you how
-to cut out dresses on a chart. And there was a lot of them lines
-drawed on it.”
-
-Annie came over and sat on his knee; she laughed, but she sighed,
-too.
-
-“No; it’s just working them out that I like,” she said. “I guess I
-like studying; that’s it.”
-
-“Well, you’re a real student, I guess,” he told her, and passed his
-rough, grimy hand over her soft hair. “Did I pull your hair?” he
-said, for it seemed as though she winced; but she only answered by
-taking his hand and kissing it, which made her father protest, and
-then cuddle her up in his arms and say, “Well, now, Annie, I think
-you’re a real scholar.”
-
-They sat in the kitchen, but not because they had not a parlor,
-like everybody else. There was a best room behind the kitchen,
-and upstairs two bedrooms, and above them an attic, rented to
-Dave Duggan, a steady young workman who had lodged with them for
-nearly a year. Of course, obviously--propinquity being the root
-of love--he had a tenderness for Annie; and he was referred to
-by the women who were not Annie’s stepmothers as her “feller.”
-The parlor, in which the gasfitter rarely sat, was as frankly
-ugly as the outside of the small, narrow frame house. It had
-been furnished according to Mrs. Graham’s taste, and it had been
-religiously unchanged since her death. The tapestry carpet, with
-its monstrous roses and broad green leaves, had worn and faded
-into inoffensiveness, and the red rep furniture had suffered the
-same kindly change; but the knitted tidies were new, and the
-plush picture frames; and Annie had added the knots of china silk
-on the chair-backs; and on the wall there was a snow-shovel,
-painted and gilded and tied with pink satin ribbons, and also some
-decorated brass placques; on the mantelpiece were two little wooden
-shoes,--Dave Duggan’s gift,--gilded and adorned with blue satin
-bows, and used as match-boxes.
-
-To Johnny Graham this terrible parlor stood for art and luxury.
-As for Annie, she did not know enough to find the snow-shovel
-painful, nor even the rolling-pin, another gift from Dave, which,
-covered with plush, hung from one corner of the mantelpiece. She
-merely thought of these things as “mother’s” and as “presents,”
-and valued them accordingly. But she would never have dreamed of
-occupying this fine room unless there was company; and, indeed, the
-kitchen was far more homelike.
-
-She sat now nestling down against her father’s shoulder, listening
-to his story of the day’s work: the fine house on the hill where he
-had gone to mend a fixture; the nice young lady he had seen; and
-the toilet-table all covered with silver things.
-
-“Why, Annie, now I tell you, there was brushes and combs made
-out of silver; and there was five little sorts of silver boxes,
-different sizes and shapes, hearts and rounds mostly. Didn’t seem
-to have nothing in ’em. I had to move ’em to get at the bracket.
-What do you suppose folks has such things for? Now a brush made
-out o’ silver is no sense; it’s heavy. Annie, now, would you like
-things like that?”
-
-“Indeed, I wouldn’t,” she said. “Think of the trouble they’d be to
-keep clean.”
-
-“Well, the help does that in them houses, I suppose,” he ruminated.
-“Annie, now, suppose you had a lot of money, would you buy them
-things?”
-
-“Indeed, I wouldn’t!” Annie said again, laughing. “No, I know what
-I’d do. I heard a girl talking about it. There’s a college for
-girls somewhere in the East, just like there is for young men. I
-would go to that college and study. My! wouldn’t I study!”
-
- * * * * *
-
-That was the beginning of what some people called the tragedy of
-Annie Graham’s life, and some the success--it all depends on how
-you look at it.
-
-Her chance remark about a girl’s college lingered in her father’s
-thoughts; Johnny Graham had not known that there were such things
-as women’s colleges. There were primary schools and high schools
-and “pay” schools, where he supposed the swells sent their
-children, but his knowledge never went farther than this.
-
-“A college for girls!” Well, why not? He believed girls was smarter
-than boys any day in the year; anyway his Annie was. He thought
-about it constantly, when, to save something for that inheritance
-in the bank, he walked to and from his work; and he thought of
-it while he worked. He spoke of it, when he had the chance, in
-a tentative way to two or three persons for whom he was doing
-jobs of gasfitting. Did they ever hear anything of them girls’
-colleges? What was they like? Did they cost money? Once, in the
-big morning-room of an old-fashioned house, he spoke to an old
-lady who sat by the fire while he screwed a lava tip on the burner
-over the mantelpiece. She was an old woman and rich, and so she
-ought to know about such things, Johnny Graham reasoned; so, with
-the respectful guilelessness of the American workman, he cleared
-his throat and said, he wondered, now, if she was knowing anything
-about girls’ colleges?
-
-The old woman started, and seemed to see him for the first time,
-and put on her glasses to inspect him.
-
-“What did you say, my good man?” she inquired.
-
-Johnny, unoffended by this offensive term, which means, “you are
-not so good as I am,” repeated his question mumblingly, with the
-old lava tip between his lips.
-
-“I have a girl I’m thinking of sending to one of them
-institutions,” he explained.
-
-The old lady frowned and took off her glasses and tapped them on
-the arm of her chair.
-
-“You will make a great mistake, my good man. It is a great mistake
-to educate your daughter above her position.”
-
-Johnny took the lava tip out of his mouth and stared at her.
-
-“Well, now, ma’am,” he said in his slow way, “I don’t see how you
-make that out. An American girl is an American girl; no matter how
-you look at it. You can’t educate her above that.”
-
-Upon which the old lady nodded her head and said: “Yes, yes; of
-course; this is what I’ve always said; this is what we are coming
-to!”
-
-And Johnny Graham rolled up his tools in his greasy leather apron,
-and went home, pondering deeply. He was not in the least angry at
-the old lady; he was simply incapable of understanding her. But
-that night he thought it over, and pointed out to himself that,
-after all, if Annie’s mind was set that way, there was no use in
-her waiting to spend her money till he was dead and gone.
-
-“I’ll probably be livin’ twenty years yet,” he thought, after some
-calculation, “and Annie maybe would be too old for a girls’ college
-then. She’d better go now; and anyway it might be a good investment
-of the money; she might set up as a teacher, maybe, after she got
-learned. They do say Councilman Welch’s daughter got four hundred
-dollars for teachin’ in the Primary School; and that’s twenty per
-cent. interest on two thousand dollars; I believe it’s a good
-thing!”
-
-It was then that Annie came in, looking, it chanced, a little
-pale, and, perhaps, a little wistful. Annie was not discontented;
-she had no aspirations; only the child was vaguely aware of an
-emptiness in her life. And she had stopped at the Public Library as
-she came home from her work, and had read an article in a magazine
-concerning a College for Women in another State.
-
-“That’s what I’d do if I were rich,” she thought, as she walked
-home. “I’d go there and study.”
-
-So she was a little absent, even when she kissed her father, and
-heard him tell all about the big house where the rich old woman
-lived all by herself, because she had quarreled with her only
-daughter.
-
-“Seems strange, now, to quarrel with your children,” said Johnny,
-buttering his bread on the tablecloth, and then, tilting his chair
-back, eating it with great contentment.
-
-After supper he told Annie what he had planned for her. Her
-amazement at her father’s wealth was almost as keen a delight
-to Johnny as was her impetuous refusal to use it, and her tears
-because he was “so good” to her; almost as keen a joy as her final
-yielding to the logic of his urging, that, after all, the family
-would be better off if she could teach, and earn a big salary. “Six
-hundred dollars, maybe,” he said, stretching his imagination for
-the purpose of convincing her.
-
-So it was arranged. Annie Graham was to go away to study; she was
-to fit herself to be a teacher; she was to be educated into her
-father’s intellectual superior; she was to be raised “above her
-station.” Would it be a failure or a success? Would she be happy or
-most miserable? Would the little dull, loving, ignorant gasfitter
-hold or lose his girl?
-
-Well, it all depends upon how you look at it.
-
- * * * * *
-
-The result of the talk that night was that in September Annie took
-the long and expensive journey East, and entered on her four years’
-course of study.
-
-Of course, there was no coming home for the holidays; the fifteen
-hundred dollars in the bank could not stand that; nor did she
-have to come back in the long vacation, which would have been a
-serious expense, for the president of the college, who was greatly
-impressed by the girl’s ability and character, permitted her to
-live in one of the college houses during the summer, and found for
-her an opportunity to teach some little children. She earned enough
-money to pay her board during those twelve weeks, and did not have
-to draw on the cherished bank account.
-
-The beginning of that college life was a strange experience to
-Annie,--the quiet, refined atmosphere, the beauty of culture, the
-conception of spaciousness and dignity, and the awaking of that
-sense of fitness which is called conventionality. To Annie these
-things were like the opening of the eyes of one born blind. By
-degrees the small niceties of life revealed themselves to her,--the
-delicacies of serving, the delicacies of living, the delicacies of
-manner and voice and thought. She felt them all with a passionate
-sort of joy.
-
-It is curious to observe that by the pure and virgin mind these
-things, which may be so worthless in their lifeless formality,
-are seen in their real and fundamental nobility, and are accepted
-with the instinct of religion. At first Annie was so normally
-unconscious of her antecedents that it did not occur to her to
-proclaim that all these things were new. And then, by and by,
-having eaten of this tree of the knowledge of good and evil, there
-came to her a certain deep spiritual experience; she recognized
-that the root of conventionality, the beginning of the sense of
-fitness, lay in character; therefore she knew no shame that her
-father ate with his knife, or sat in his shirt-sleeves, or did many
-unlovely things. She did not like them; but she knew no shame, only
-love. But it was then that, very simply, she took occasion to say
-that her father, who was a mechanic, had sent her here to college,
-so that she might be fitted to support herself by teaching. She
-said this because she recognized another point of view, and,
-recognizing it, felt a certain lack of straightforwardness in
-keeping silent; and also because she was proud of Johnny Graham.
-Then she forgot it. It was too unimportant to think of.
-
-She assimilated all these new ideas, and felt them and lived them,
-as though she had been to the manner born. Her very face reflected
-them. She was almost a beautiful young woman. Her deep eyes looked
-out from under her straight, pure brows with a certain high
-directness of glance and tranquil self-poise which gave a sense of
-breeding which was inescapable. The fact that she had said that she
-was poor was only in its way another proof of her superiority--so
-some of the college-girls said, who went into schoolgirl ecstasies
-about her.
-
-“You know it’s vulgar to be rich,” a young man told her one
-evening, as they talked together in the June dusk. It was Annie’s
-fifth year, and for the first time she was going home in the long
-vacation. A scholarship, and four summers of teaching some little
-children in a country house on the outskirts of the village, had
-meant that for the last two years Johnny Graham’s bank account had
-been recuperating, a very, very little; at all events, there had
-been no drain upon it.
-
-And now Annie was going home. She had won the highest honors of her
-class, and had even been offered a position on the college staff,
-and her happiness was as frank as a child’s.
-
-“In so many weeks I’ll see father. In so many days!”--she kept
-saying to herself. And now it had come to Saturday evening, and she
-was to start home on Monday. She was walking back from her little
-pupils’ house, where she had said good-by until September. She was
-not alone.
-
-A certain Dick Temple, a cousin of her pupils’ mother, had a way of
-running down from town to spend Sundays with the Pauls, to play,
-he said, with the children, and get in some rowing on the river,
-and to exercise his cousin John’s polo ponies, and--to see Annie
-Graham.
-
-But this last was not so stated in the bond.
-
-He had a way of appearing in time to walk across the campus with
-her, after little Kate’s music lesson Saturday afternoon, and once
-or twice he had beguiled her into his boat, and they had gone
-floating down the river in the twilight, talking of everything in
-heaven and earth. Being young, religion had been their first theme;
-and then, by and by, love;--in the abstract, of course. A month
-ago, they both had feared themselves incapable of experiencing this
-beautiful emotion--Annie, because she was going to devote herself
-to study and her father; Dick, because he had outlived such things,
-and was very bitter and cynical and mysterious in his allusions to
-life, which, he said, “he knew.” Sometimes they talked of their
-future; and it was then that Annie had told him, smiling, that
-she had no such luxurious prospects as those which he had been
-outlining for himself,--travel, and study, and the philanthropic
-opportunities of great wealth.
-
-They were walking slowly along under the great elms toward her
-door; it had rained earlier in the day, and the worn bricks of the
-narrow pavement held here and there shallow pools of water; the sun
-struck across the wet grass in a low flood of gold; and there was
-the scent of young leaves and roses in the air.
-
-“We are poor people,” Annie had said, with an amused look; “I’m
-going to teach school and wear spectacles, and be very stern and
-learned.”
-
-“Ah, well,” returned the young man, “it’s the thing to be poor
-nowadays; it’s awfully vulgar to be rich! It’s queer, now, when you
-think of it, Miss Graham, how many people in our class have lost
-their money, isn’t it?”
-
-“We’ve never had it to lose,” Annie said; “the family fortunes are
-to rise on school-teaching.”
-
-Dick glanced at her with quick admiration in his handsome young
-eyes. He was twenty-four, but he blundered over his words like a
-schoolboy.
-
-“Miss Graham,” he said, “you won’t mind if I say I think it’s
-awfully fine in you, don’t you know, to teach, and all that sort
-of thing? Of course, girls do things now. I mean nice girls, don’t
-you know. Why, cousin Kate gave music lessons before she married;
-and she was a Townsend. Still, it’s people like that, don’t you
-know, that can afford to do things like that!”
-
-“I don’t suppose any one can afford to be dependent,” Annie said
-simply, “and my father is really poor, Mr. Temple.”
-
-Her beautiful direct look as she said this made the young fellow’s
-heart suddenly leap. He wanted to burst out and tell her how much
-he admired her; admired? no, loved her! That was the word. Yes, he,
-who had thought he had outlived all that sort of thing. All in a
-moment he felt that he wanted to tell her this; but she seemed so
-remote that he dared not speak.
-
-“I suppose I ought to get my governor to go and call on hers,”
-he reflected; “these decayed gentlefolks are death on propriety.
-But maybe she wouldn’t look at me, anyway,” he added to himself,
-in a miserable afterthought; for she began to speak in such an
-interested way of some mathematical work she had to do that night,
-that he felt there was no room for him in her thoughts. He left
-her at the college door and went back, ardent and despairing, to
-confide in his cousin Kate, who, it must be admitted, had rather
-a startled expression when he told her he was “all bowled over by
-Miss Graham.”
-
-“But, Dick, what would your father say if it got serious? Cousin
-Henry has such ideas, you know. She’s a charming girl, but we don’t
-know anything about her people.”
-
-“We know they are poor,” Dick said boldly; “but that doesn’t matter
-in the least. Surely you are not so narrow, Cousin Kate, as to
-think it matters?”
-
-“No, that doesn’t matter, of course,” cousin Kate said doubtfully.
-
- * * * * *
-
-As for Annie, she went, smiling a little, and blushing a little,
-upstairs to her room. But she did no work in higher mathematics
-that night.
-
-Instead, she finished her packing, and wrote her last semi-weekly
-letter of the term to her father. To be sure, he would get it just
-a day or two before she came herself; but she would not have had
-Johnny Graham miss that Saturday letter for a good deal. She knew
-he would carry it about in his pocket, and read it over and over,
-and put it on the wooden chair beside his bed at night. Perhaps it
-was a little more affectionate, this last letter, than usual; she
-told him about the weather, and that she would start on Monday,
-and would telegraph him when to expect her. And something of the
-progress of her two pupils; and how she had made an experiment in
-the laboratory, and had burned her fingers; and--and that she had
-met an interesting man, a cousin of Mrs. Paul’s. He had taken her
-out rowing once or twice, she said. And, oh! she was so happy that
-she was coming home! She could hardly believe that it was true, she
-was so glad. And then she said she was always his little girl who
-loved him--“Annie.”
-
-Then when it was written, she put her head down on her arms, folded
-upon her writing-table; there were tears in her eyes when she
-lifted it again.
-
-“When he said ‘our class,’ ought I to have spoken?” she asked
-herself. “No, he must know; I told Mrs. Paul. No, no, I couldn’t!”
-And all her love and all her pride for her father rebelled against
-the slight to him which such a confession would have been; it would
-have seemed to imply that he was less gentle in soul than Richard
-Temple himself, or any one else.
-
-Mr. Temple saw her at church the next day and walked home with
-her; although she kept all the while on Mrs. Paul’s right, while
-Dick had to walk on the outside and could only look across at her,
-which did not please him in the least. She did not talk to him very
-much, but she seemed to have a good deal to say to his cousin,
-which perplexed her adorer, for though he had a proper regard for
-the stout and estimable Mrs. Paul, he could not see why Miss Graham
-should talk to her with such apparent interest, when an intelligent
-young man was really eager for a look or a word. He heard her
-laughing a little about going home “like a stranger and foreigner,”
-she said.
-
-“I haven’t seen South Bend for nearly five years; you know it is
-such an expensive journey.”
-
-Mrs. Paul said yes, she supposed it was. “It takes four days
-and five nights to get there, doesn’t it? It seems to me I
-passed through it once. I suppose those Western places are very
-progressive, aren’t they? They are not shocked at the idea of a
-university education for women. One runs up against that here very
-often.”
-
-Annie shook her head, smiling. “Isn’t it funny to think that people
-do really feel that it is unfeminine; ‘threatening to the womanly
-woman,’ as they say.”
-
-“I’ve come to think that the ‘womanly woman’ means the brainless
-woman,” Mrs. Paul said.
-
-“What fools people are who feel that way about the higher education
-of women,” Dick broke in. “It’s incredible! Miss Graham, I shall be
-passing through South Bend in a fortnight or so; may I call?”
-
-“Of course; I shall be delighted to see you,” Annie said, “and my
-father will be so glad to see any friend of Mrs. Paul’s; he knows
-how kind you have been to me,” she ended, with an affectionate look
-at Dick’s cousin.
-
-Then Mr. Temple, with an eager timidity so foreign to him that Mrs.
-Paul suppressed a smile with difficulty, wondered if Miss Graham
-would have time to go out on the river that evening? He knew she
-would be awfully busy; but it would be a heavenly evening on the
-river! He was so promptly assured that she should not have time
-that the poor fellow looked very blank; in fact, he was distinctly
-cross in the family circle for the rest of the day. At night he
-softened and tried to be amiable, for he was constrained to be
-confidential, and he knew that “Cousin Kate” would not hesitate to
-snub him unless he made himself agreeable.
-
-“Now, really, don’t you think she’s very unusual?” he insisted,
-after having told Mrs. Paul all the pleasant things which he could
-remember that Miss Graham had said to him about her two little
-pupils.
-
-“If you mean Miss Graham, why, yes, I do think she’s unusual, Dick.”
-
-“Did you ever notice,” said the fatuous Dick, “how softly her hair
-grows around her forehead? And her eyes--what color are her eyes?”
-
-“I’m sure I can’t say,” Mrs. Paul answered dryly. “Dick, would you
-mind going in and getting me a shawl? It’s rather cool out here on
-the terrace.” When he came back she had made up her mind how to
-proceed. “Now, Dick, listen, I’m not a snob, but”--
-
-“If you are going to say anything about that beautiful creature’s
-working for her living,” Dick threatened, “you might as well stop
-on the spot.”
-
-“Of course I’m not going to say anything about her working for her
-living; why should I? I worked for my living before I married John.
-You know I’m not a snob, but I do believe in class. I don’t mean
-to be unkind, and certainly she is a charming girl, and--ladylike.
-But--there is something, I can’t tell what it is--that seems as if
-she had not always been used to things”--
-
-Dick Temple said something between his teeth, and his cousin flung
-her head up.
-
-“Dick!”
-
-“Well, it makes a man want to be emphatic, Cousin Kate,--such
-nonsense! Class? We’re Americans, thank the Lord! And talk about
-ancestors, I never saw descent so plainly. Look at the way she
-carries her head! And her voice, her manner! Darn it, because a
-girl’s poor”--
-
-“Good-night, Richard,” said Mrs. Paul, rising with great dignity.
-
-“Oh, hold on! Don’t get mad. Hold your base. I apologize; only, it
-seems pretty hard to be down on a girl”--
-
-“You know I’m not down on her; I like her very much; I respect her
-very much.”
-
-“Well, then, what’s the matter?” demanded Dick boldly.
-
-“I don’t know. Only I have a vague recollection that when she
-came to teach the children she mentioned, in a casual sort of
-way, something about--about her home, or her father and mother,
-or something. I can’t really remember, but I know I gained the
-impression that she was”--
-
-“Poor?” Dick burst in. “Of course she’s poor. She has never made
-any secret of that. Why should she? Only a cad would do that.”
-
-“I don’t mean poor,” Mrs. Paul said, frowning. “I wish you would
-have some manners, Dick, and not interrupt. I merely mean that a
-young man has no right to pay attention to a girl in another class
-unless he means to follow it up. I despise a trifler, Dick.”
-
-“You don’t despise him any more than I do,” Dick returned loftily.
-“But there isn’t any question of class here. We don’t have any
-higher class than hers; and as for ‘following it up,’ as you
-say--if a fellow thought there was any chance for him with that
-woman he’d follow it up quick enough, and ask her to marry him!
-Yes, and he ought to do it as formally as though she were a
-princess. She _is_ a princess! He ought to go and ask her father
-if he might ask her. Her poverty, which seems to trouble you so
-much, Cousin Kate, has no bearing on the situation.”
-
-Poor Dick was smarting with Annie’s apparent coldness and his
-cousin’s snobbishness--so he called it; but there was really no
-excuse for bursting out at Mrs. Paul in this way; and it was no
-wonder that she said good-night with some asperity, and went
-upstairs and told her husband that Dick was a perfect goose,
-besides being rather a cub.
-
-“He’s twenty-four and old enough to know better,” she said. “Oh,
-dear, I do wish his father was here!”
-
-“You’d better wish her father was here; then you’d know the pit
-whence she was digged,” John Paul said. “Of course, if he ever sold
-cotton by the yard, Dick’s future happiness would be imperiled.”
-
-“Now, John, don’t be horrid,” said his wife impatiently; “you know
-perfectly well what I mean. I’m not a snob, as I told Dick, but
-there is such a thing as class.”
-
-“If Dick’s worth anything,” pronounced John Paul, standing before
-his glass and ripping his collar off the stud with a vicious tug,
-“he’ll marry that girl if her father is a hod-carrier.”
-
-
-II
-
-Five years! It was a long time. Johnny, standing in the railroad
-station, his heart beating high with pride and joy, couldn’t help
-crying out when he saw her:--
-
-“Why, how you’ve growed, Annie! Bless my heart, if you ain’t
-growed!” But his eyes were misty, so perhaps it was that made
-his little Annie look so tall. He had not recognized her for a
-moment,--this lady who, with the tears trembling in her eyes, came
-up to him and took his hands and cried out, “Father!” Afterward he
-said he didn’t know why he had taken her for a lady, for, sakes
-alive, her clothes were plain enough. He was quite distressed about
-her clothes.
-
-“You’ve stinted yourself, Annie,” he reproached her as they went
-home in the street cars. “You ought to be havin’ a silk dress,
-lookin’ the way you do. Why, I took you for a lady, Annie. You
-ought to have fine clothes, my pretty; we’ll take some money out of
-the bank and get you a regular silk dress,” he told her, scolding
-her and loving her, and bursting with pride, and taking up their
-intercourse just where it had paused, five years ago. She was a
-pretty girl and a great learner, Johnny thought; but she was just
-his Annie.
-
-It was late when they got home. He had left the kitchen fire clear
-and ready for the steak Annie would broil, and the gas was flaring
-wide from new burners, and Johnny had bought a long plush scarf for
-the top of the mantelpiece over the kitchen range. When Annie was
-fairly in the house, and the door was shut, it seemed as though
-the happiness of heaven had come into the little kitchen. Johnny
-laughed, and drew the back of his hand across his nose, and sniffed
-and blinked, and the tears ran freely down his little cheeks. He
-walked round and round Annie in critical inspection; and ran her
-from room to room, even up to Dave Duggan’s attic, to show her how
-unchanged everything was. He made her come into the parlor and
-showed her the faded ribbons and tottering plush frames.
-
-“I dusted ’em every Sunday, Annie,” he said. And then he told her
-how he had turned out the person to whom he had rented her old
-room. “Well, now, he was set on stayin’,” Johnny said; “he was
-always sayin’ he wanted to see you, but I guess Dave Duggan was
-just as well pleased not to have him round. Dave ain’t married yet,
-Annie.” Then Johnny laughed very much, and added, winking at his
-own joke, that he guessed Dave had forgotten her, she’d been away
-so long.
-
-The wonderful thing about it all, and the beautiful thing about it
-all, was that this little man did not in the least care that his
-Annie was an educated woman; he did not even know it.
-
-It seemed as if Annie could not enough show the tenderness that
-made her heart ache with its swelling. She sat beside him, holding
-his work-roughened hands in hers, and told him over and over about
-these five years which he had given her; she knew, and she was
-feeling as she spoke, how every joy of study, and every pang of
-the happiness of appreciation had come from these patient, loving,
-grimy old hands. “You’ve given me everything,” her heart was
-saying, “and I love you! I can never say how much.” But it seemed
-as though it were saying, also, “Why, why did you put me where I
-was to learn that you were you, and I was I?”
-
-One looks on at such a situation and says, “If it could stop here,
-it might be possible.” But it cannot stop there. It is not the
-adjustment of the relations between parents and child which is
-the difficult thing. The acceptance of a different point of view
-by these three may even come without much pain. No; it is the
-outsiders who make the situation impossible--the father’s cronies,
-the mother’s friends, the acquaintances of the untaught girlhood.
-The impossibility revealed itself that very night when Dave Duggan
-came in to welcome her home. Annie gave him her hand, flushing and
-paling at his familiarity, his boisterous, facetious “Hollo, Annie!
-How you was?” In him, after that easy greeting, the first note of
-the difference made for all time was struck; for he grew conscious
-and uneasy, and scuffled his feet, and cleared his throat, and
-laughed in a silly way. Yet all the old admiration spoke in his
-eyes. Johnny was full of significant jokes, and kept elbowing Annie
-and winking; and Dave’s loud rebukes of his host’s “fun” were even
-more meaning.
-
-At nearly midnight Annie went upstairs, tired, white, smiling; and
-lay open-eyed until dawn.
-
- * * * * *
-
-Dick Temple’s intention of “passing through South Bend in a
-fortnight” was a little delayed. Cousin Kate’s vague misgivings
-took the form of a postscript in a casual note to his mother; there
-was no more than a word or two about Dick’s _tendresse_ for a
-pretty college-girl who had been the children’s governess during
-the last three summers while they were out of town; that was all.
-But it was enough. And Mrs. Paul felt she had done her duty.
-
-“And perhaps prevented Dick from doing his,” her husband commented
-grimly.
-
-“If he can be prevented, he’d better be; for he wouldn’t be good
-enough for Annie Graham!” cousin Kate declared with much spirit,
-and immediately became, in her own mind, the champion of the
-incipient love affair.
-
-Her letter was passed on by Dick’s mother to Dick’s father, who
-said good-naturedly that the boy was a jackass.
-
-“The young lady is probably too good, for him,” said Mr. Henry
-Temple, “but I’m not going to have that boy marrying John Paul’s
-governess without a few remarks from me.”
-
-Mr. Temple telegraphed his son not to leave town on the day he had
-arranged, as he wished to see him; and then he came all the way
-from Old Chester for the purpose of making the remarks, which, of
-course, were to be general; it would give the matter too much
-importance to treat it as particular or probable. So, in a casual
-way, he referred to cousin Kate’s letter, and enjoined his son
-not to be a fool. Dick’s instantly aggressive attitude and skill
-in “answering back” were most surprising to Mr. Temple. A man is
-always surprised at his son’s ability in this direction; it is
-as though his own hand or foot suddenly acquired individuality.
-Furthermore, Richard was very sentimental, and had much to say of
-his father’s un-American point of view and of his own readiness
-to marry a “woman he loved” (if she’d have him) if she were a
-washerwoman.
-
-“As for Miss Graham,” said Dick, “I’ve no right even to speak of
-her; but she’s a lady, and an angel”--
-
-“Oh, Lord!” groaned Mr. Temple. “I wonder if I ever was as young as
-you, Dickon?”
-
-But he was really disturbed, and wrote to a friend who owned the
-great South Bend Rolling and Smelting Furnaces, and might be
-expected to know who and what the Grahams were.
-
-Meantime, Dick Temple, twice as much in earnest for his father’s
-not unreasonable expostulation, packed his things and started for
-the West. It was a hot July afternoon when he arrived in South
-Bend; he was fretted by the heat and his own impatience and the
-stupidity of the landlord of the hotel in being unable to tell him
-where Mr. Graham lived.
-
-“There’s no family by that name on the hill, sir,” he said.
-“Graham--Graham--there’s some Grahams here in the directory; what’s
-the gentleman’s business, sir?”
-
-“I don’t know,” Dick said, fuming. “What sort of a place is this,
-anyhow, that you don’t know where people live? It’s small enough
-for you to know everybody”--
-
-“We’ve twenty thousand inhabitants, young man,” said the landlord
-with much offense. “The only Graham I know is Johnny; he’s a
-gasfitter, and does odd jobs here once in a while”--
-
-“Have your clerk copy all those Graham addresses,” said
-Dick coldly. “I’ll go round till I find the person I wish.
-Unfortunately I don’t know the gentleman’s first name. Have you got
-any kind of conveyance in this place? Just have a hack called, will
-you?”
-
-He spoke with the insolence of tone peculiar to well-bred young
-men, and he walked to the open door and stood waiting for the
-carriage and frowning out at the passers-by. There was a red glare
-from the furnaces on the other side of the river, shifting and
-fading on the coils of black smoke which lay motionless in the
-still, hot air. The street was the narrow unlovely street of the
-small manufacturing town of the West.
-
-“It’s a beastly place,” Dick said to himself with an irritation
-which had its root in some formless apprehension; and he got into
-the lumbering, rattling hack and slammed the door with vicious
-emphasis. “What on earth does her father live here for, anyhow?” he
-said to himself.
-
-The carriage drew up first at a small market, where piles of faded
-vegetables, flanked by glass cases of meats, jutted out upon the
-pavement; a man in a dirty white butcher’s frock leaned against
-the door-post, and two jets of gas flared and flickered from long
-iron stand-pipes.
-
-The driver leaned down from his box and called out in friendly
-tones to know if this was the place.
-
-“Idiot!” said Dick under his breath. “Of course not. Try the next
-address.”
-
-This was a forlorn, untidy-looking house on a side street. Lodgers’
-heads were thrust out of the windows as Dick climbed the steps and
-inquired whether Miss Annie Graham lived there? He was conscious
-of a distinct relief when he went back again to the carriage. They
-went to two other houses, but there was no Miss Annie Graham.
-
-“I guess,” said the hackman, “we’ll have to cross over to the other
-side of the river. There’s a Graham over there, at Jack’s Corners.
-Jack’s Corners is a fine suburb, sir.”
-
-Dick’s heart rose.
-
-“All right; go on,” he said. “Can’t you hurry those beasts of yours
-up?”
-
-And so it was that, about seven o’clock, the cabman drew up before
-a small, detached frame house on the Mill Road. It was so hot
-that the kitchen windows were wide open, and one could see the
-table drawn up between them, and a little man in his shirt-sleeves
-eating his supper. Opposite him, by the other window, was a girl
-with a fan in her hand, and between them were two other persons,
-for Johnny was entertaining that night. Dave Duggan, uncomfortable,
-he knew not why (although it certainly was not the weather, for
-he had, with great good sense, removed his coat), sat on Annie’s
-left; and next to him, beside Johnny, was an enormously fat woman,
-in a sort of loose white sack. This was Mrs. Pugsley, who was one
-of those neighboring ladies of thwarted stepmother potentialities.
-“But you never know what’ll happen,” Mrs. Pugsley often remarked,
-and dropped in this hot July night in a friendly way to see if
-Annie was making her father comfortable. It was Mrs. Pugsley’s
-opinion that all this learning wasn’t no good. “Better know how
-to dish a meal’s victuals,” said Mrs. Pugsley, “than be readin’
-story papers all the time. That’s what them high-school girls does
-mostly.”
-
-The room was faintly lighted by a kerosene lamp on the mantelpiece;
-but the real radiance was in Johnny’s face, as he looked across a
-bunch of roses in the middle of the narrow table at his Annie.
-
-“Annie walked out two miles to get them flowers,” he said.
-
-“Must ’a’ wanted something to do,” said Mrs. Pugsley.
-
-“I’d ’a’ got ’em for you, Annie,” Dave said bashfully, “if I’d
-a-known you wanted ’em.” And it was just then that the carriage
-drew up at the door.
-
-Dick, hot and disappointed and disgusted at the coachman’s
-stupidity in bringing him into this obviously mechanic’s suburb,
-leaned out to say, “Drive on!” And then he saw her.
-
-There was a flutter in the tenement at seeing a hack draw up.
-Johnny Graham rose, seeing in a burst of fancy an important and
-hasty job, and a carriage sent to convey him to a wilderness of
-leaks or broken tips. Mrs. Pugsley conceived the hack to be a
-summons from a lady friend who had expected to need her services
-on a felicitous occasion, and was instantly agitated, and got up
-panting, and saying:--
-
-“Goodness! they’ve sent!”
-
-But Annie knew.
-
-One wonders if she flinched, there in the twilight. She rose at
-once and went to the front door, her hand outstretched in pleased
-welcome.
-
-“Why, Mr. Temple! This is very pleasant,” she said. “Father, dear,
-this is Mr. Temple.”
-
-Dick’s face was white. He took Johnny Graham’s hand and bowed, with
-some murmured reference to pleasure.
-
-“This is my friend, Mr. Duggan, Mr. Temple,” Annie went on
-placidly, “and Mrs. Pugsley.”
-
-Dick bowed twice. He saw dimly, in the dusky kitchen interior, two
-other figures, one of which, assisted by the other, was struggling
-into a coat.
-
-“Why, now set down, sir,” Johnny said joyously; “take a seat and
-set down. Annie, now, can’t you make room there by Dave? We
-was just setting out to eat our tea, sir; it’s so hot, we was
-late,--but it’s the style to be late, I hear! I guess we ain’t eat
-up everything, have we, Annie? I guess there’s something left for
-your gentleman friend.”
-
-“You’re very kind,” Dick protested feebly; but he sat down, too
-bewildered to find any excuse.
-
-Annie put a plate before him, and told him he must have some iced
-tea.
-
-“It’s the only thing that makes life possible in this weather,” she
-said; “but I can’t make father believe it; he takes his boiling.”
-
-“Well, sir,” said Johnny, “you had quite a jaunt to get out here,
-hadn’t you? But I don’t mind the walk myself, back and forth from
-my work, for it’s fresher out here.”
-
-“I didn’t know your address,” Dick said, not looking at Annie;
-“I’ve been driving round”--
-
-“When I saw that carriage drive up,” Mrs. Pugsley said, still
-panting, “I thought a lady friend of mine had sent for me; it give
-me such a start!”
-
-“Tell me how you left Mrs. Paul,” Annie asked.
-
-“Oh, thanks, very well,” Dick assured her; and there was a moment’s
-pause. Mrs. Pugsley and Dave were blankly silent. Annie talked
-against time.
-
-“It was so nice to get home. Just think, I had been away five
-years,” she said; “that’s a pretty long time not to see one’s
-father; father didn’t know me when he met me at the station;--now,
-I would have known you anywhere!” she reproached Johnny, with a
-loving look.
-
-“Well, but now, you’d growed, Annie; that’s what I said when I saw
-her. I says, ‘Why, Annie, you’ve growed!’ Dave, here, don’t see no
-change in her. But I do,” Johnny ended proudly.
-
-“You must have missed your daughter very much,” Mr. Temple murmured.
-
-“Well, indeed, an’ he did,” Mrs. Pugsley said resentfully; “but she
-would be studyin’. She’s that set on it.”
-
-“Miss Graham is devoted to mathematics,” Dick began miserably,
-“and--and that sort of thing”--
-
-He stopped so abruptly that Mrs. Pugsley’s hoarse whisper to Dave
-Duggan was audible to all,--
-
-“Say, is he Annie’s feller?”
-
-“Hush!” said Dave Duggan.
-
-Dick drank his tumbler of iced tea with violent haste, and even
-Johnny looked disconcerted. Annie said something about the roses.
-
-“The thing I miss most in South Bend are the gardens,” she said.
-“You know we are all working people on this side of the river, and
-there are no old houses, so there are no beautiful big gardens. I
-had to walk far out into the country for those.”
-
-“Won’t you have anything more?” Johnny inquired hospitably. “Take
-another helping of something? You won’t? Oh, now, take a taste of
-this! No? Well, let’s go into the parlor, Annie.”
-
-If Annie held back, no one saw it. They went into the best room,
-where Johnny set all the gas burners flaring, that the full glories
-of the decorations might strike the visitor, who, indeed, saw
-nothing but Annie’s set face.
-
-“Miss Graham,” he said, “you are coming East again in September,
-aren’t you?”
-
-“I think not; I think I must never leave father again. He is not
-very strong, and I want to be with him.”
-
-“Oh, yes, quite so,” Dick answered, “but”--
-
-“But what, Mr. Temple?”
-
-“Oh, nothing; I only thought--I thought you were to teach in the
-college, and”--
-
-He did not know how to end his sentence; he caught Dave Duggan’s
-eyes glowering at him, and Johnny’s rather obsequious smile. Johnny
-had the true American veneration for wealth, and he felt that this
-gentleman who kept a hack waiting for an hour was a rich man.
-
-“I shall never leave my father,” Annie said, in a low voice.
-
-Now Richard Temple was not a mean or unworthy man; he was a
-well-born, well-bred, well-educated young American gentleman; but
-he had been placed suddenly at a cruel disadvantage; his presence
-of mind deserted him--he was bewildered and confounded. His plans
-and hopes were all adrift. He could not meet Annie Graham’s eyes
-again; he said good-night, at first effusively, and then haughtily;
-and sneaked out to his carriage, anxious only to escape from an
-intolerable situation.
-
-“Hope you’ll come again and talk over old times with Annie, sir,”
-Johnny said, shaking Dick’s hand all the time that he was speaking;
-“you’ll call again, sir?”
-
-“Oh, certainly, yes, of course,” Dick answered wretchedly.
-
-But Annie knew better.
-
- * * * * *
-
-Dave Duggan had watched Annie’s visitor with burning eyes. He
-followed the conversation with painful intentness, and a sense of
-speed which made him breathless. He wished to join in it,--and kept
-moistening his lips and clearing his throat, but he never found the
-courage to speak. His shyness probably prevented him from being
-rude; for his feeling about Dick was rage, pure and simple.
-
-“He’s a blamed dude,” he thought to himself again and again; but he
-could think of nothing to say which would convey this opinion, and
-yet fit into the conversation. But when Dick had slunk back to his
-carriage Dave’s feelings burst forth. For a few moments, indeed,
-the little group (except Annie) talked, in their excitement, all
-together.
-
-“Ain’t he handsome!” Johnny said proudly; he was proud of anything
-connected with Annie.
-
-“He’s real rich, Annie, ain’t he? Ridin’ in hacks?” Mrs. Pugsley
-demanded.
-
-“He’s a blamed dude; that’s what he is,” Dave said fiercely.
-
-“I thought he was your feller, Annie,” Mrs. Pugsley declared,
-panting and fanning herself.
-
-“Well, now, he’s none too good to be,” Johnny announced, chuckling.
-
-“Father, dear, wouldn’t it be nicer to sit out on the steps, where
-it’s cooler? I’ll put the tea things away, and then I’ll come,
-too. Please--_go!_” she ended. Johnny looked at her in surprise,
-sensitive to every change in her voice.
-
-“Why, now--Annie?” he faltered.
-
-“I’ll be through with the dishes in a few minutes, father, dear,”
-she said; and so Johnny led the way to the front door and placed a
-chair on the hard, black earth at the foot of the steps for Mrs.
-Pugsley, and told Dave to take off his coat again.
-
-“It’s that hot,” Johnny said, “there’s no good wearin’ coats.”
-
-“Now that dude’s gone, I suppose there’s no harm being
-comfortable,” Dave agreed angrily.
-
-They sat there in the dusk, Johnny and Mrs. Pugsley talking the
-visit over. They could hear Annie moving about in the kitchen,
-washing the dishes. After a while Dave Duggan got up and with
-painstaking and elaborate efforts not to attract attention went,
-with creaking, clumsy steps, into the kitchen. Annie stood by the
-sink, with her back to him. He heard her draw in her breath in a
-broken sob; and then he saw--he saw that tears were running down
-her face.
-
-“Annie!” he said; “oh, now, Annie, don’t, don’t mind, Annie, dear!”
-He put out his hands beseechingly, his face red and wincing with
-feeling. Annie turned her shoulder toward him, and set her teeth.
-She drew her wrist across her eyes.
-
-“It’s that dude’s hurt your feelin’s, Annie--darn him! but never
-you mind, he ain’t worth”--
-
-“Oh, please go away, Dave,” Annie said; “you don’t know what you
-are talking about! Please go back to father.”
-
-“Annie,” he burst out, “look here: he ain’t worth it. I say, Annie,
-will you take up with me?”
-
-“I really don’t know what you are talking about. Mr. Temple--if you
-are referring to him--has not hurt my feelings in the least. I--I
-had something on my mind, and”--
-
-“Oh, Annie,” poor Dave said, “what I’m wanting to know”--He stood
-there in his shirt-sleeves beside the sink, his voice trembling,
-one big red hand opening and shutting the hot-water spigot. “I’m
-just wanting to know if you’ll marry me, Annie. Say, now, will you?”
-
-She shrank from him, a sort of horror in her face.
-
-“_You?_”
-
-“You ain’t mad?” he entreated.
-
-“It is quite impossible,” she answered hoarsely; “quite, quite!
-Never speak to me of such a thing”--Her face was stinging, her
-voice was broken, as a woman’s might be to whom some insulting
-thing had been said. “You will go, if you please,” she ended, her
-head high, and with a certain gesture that confounded him.
-
-“But look a-here,” he insisted, following her as she moved away
-from him; “Annie, look a-here; that fellow ain’t a-goin’ to marry
-anybody but a rich lady; his kind ain’t goin’ to marry you.”
-
-“Well, I shan’t marry my kind, then! You can just understand that,”
-she cried, with a sudden almost coarse fury. “There’s no use for
-you to think of such a thing. Don’t ever dare to spake to me that
-way again!”
-
- * * * * *
-
-This is as far as Annie Graham has lived her story. She and Dave
-practically summed the matter up between them: “His kind will not
-marry you;” and “I will not marry my kind.”
-
-The story is unfinished; one waits to see what will happen.
-
-There are three things open to Annie: She may live out her life
-in South Bend; teaching, perhaps, in the public school, gradually
-refining the terrible little house, rejoicing Johnny’s heart, and
-never interfering, merely for her own æsthetic necessities, with
-the unlovely habits of Johnny’s fifty years of unlovely living; she
-may learn to accept his intimates as her acquaintances, his Mrs.
-Pugsleys and Dave Duggans as household friends, starving all the
-while for the companionship of her equals. Or--
-
-She may shake off these intolerable surroundings which make her
-shrink as instinctively as an open eye shrinks from dust; she
-may turn her back on South Bend, and the tenement house, and the
-painted snow-shovel, and her father’s shirt-sleeves, and her
-father’s tender heart, and go out into the world to live her own
-strong, refined, intellectual life, perhaps as a teacher in her
-old college; marrying, after a while, some one who has never seen
-her father, and coming into the soul-destroying possession of that
-skeleton in the American closet--the vulgarity of the preceding
-generation. Or--
-
-She may, because of sheer misery in the struggle between the new
-and the old, and for the dreadful suffocating comfort of it, fall
-back into the pit whence she was digged and try to forget the upper
-air.
-
-What is the child’s duty? To live her own life, or to live some one
-else’s life? Is she to accept success or failure, fulfillment or
-renunciation?
-
-People differ as to what constitutes success; some go so far as
-to say that the highest fulfillment lies in renunciation; and
-certainly there was once a life that might have been called a
-failure because it ended upon a cross on Calvary.
-
-I suppose it all depends on how you look at it.
-
-
-
-
-THE LAW, OR THE GOSPEL
-
-
-I
-
-EVERYBODY in Mercer knew Sara Wharton; in the first
-place, she was Edward Wharton’s daughter; the Edward Wharton of
-the Wharton & Blair Company, whose great Rolling and Smelting
-Mills darken Mercer’s sky with vast folds of black smoke, and give
-employment to two thirds of Mercer’s population. In the second
-place, she was a very charming young lady, who was too pretty to
-pass unnoticed when her victoria went rolling along the river road
-on fine afternoons. And in the third place, she was the president
-of two girls’ clubs, and the organizer of the Boys’ Alliance, and
-the Young Men’s Literary Association, and the founder of the Y. W.
-C. T. U., and the kindly autocrat of all Mercer’s rough, grimy,
-under-fed young people. She was a sweet-hearted, wholesome-minded,
-impulsive, dear child; the kind of girl who loved a party just as
-much, and planned her pretty dresses just as anxiously, and adored
-her father and mother just as unreasonably, as though she had never
-heard of a committee, and was indifferent to the Cause of Humanity.
-All Mercer knew her, and believed in her; and so when, one gray
-November afternoon, she was seen to go quietly up the steps of a
-certain house on Baker Street--a house which decent folk affected
-to ignore when they passed it by at midday, but at which they
-glanced curiously after nightfall--when Sara Wharton went into this
-house, those who chanced to see her said only, “Well! what won’t
-that girl do next?”
-
-The woman who answered her ring opened the door scarcely more than
-a crack, and peered out at her sourly.
-
-“I want to see Nellie Sherman,” said Miss Wharton.
-
-“There’s no person by that name here,” the woman answered.
-
-“Let me in, please,” Sara Wharton said. She put her hand against
-the door, which yielded a little and then stopped; the woman inside
-had braced her foot against it.
-
-“She ain’t in.”
-
-“I will wait until she comes, then,” returned the young lady
-pleasantly.
-
-“I don’t know why you’re comin’ here lookin’ for a girl,” the woman
-cried out, in sudden, shrewish rage; “this is a respectable house;
-there’s no Sherman girl here!”
-
-“Let me in at once,” said Sara Wharton, “or I shall get a
-policeman, and have a warrant served. I know Nellie Sherman lives
-here, and I want to see her. You had better let me in without
-further talk. I am Miss Wharton.”
-
-“I don’t care if you are Queen Victoria,” the keeper of the house
-declared angrily; “well, you can come in, though there ain’t no
-Nellie Sherman here; there’s a Nettie Sherman,--if she’s the girl
-you’re looking for.”
-
-“Tell her I want to see her, please.”
-
-“She’s up in her room. You can go up.” Miss Wharton’s instant’s
-hesitation made her add, “There ain’t nobody there.”
-
-The halls and stairs were nearly dark; one or two frowzy heads
-peered over the banisters, and drew back quickly; there was a loud
-guffaw of laughter from behind a closed door, and all the air was
-heavy with the reek of stale tobacco.
-
-“Her room’s the third floor back,” the woman called up after the
-visitor, who went swiftly over the stairs, intent upon her errand,
-yet with a faint shudder, a sort of physical shrinking, that made
-her gather her cloak close about her, lest it might touch the wall
-or banisters.
-
-“I’m glad I told Thomas to wait,” she said to herself, thinking
-of the brougham at the door, with the respectable, long-suffering
-Thomas on the box. At the third floor back she knocked, and waited
-for a reply; then she knocked again.
-
-“What is it?” a muffled voice asked; “is that you, Mamie? Go ’way!
-I’m busy.”
-
-“It is I; Miss Wharton; a friend of your aunt’s. Let me in,
-Nellie.” There was a breathless pause, and then a quick step, and
-a bolt was snapped back. A slight, startled-looking girl stood in
-the doorway. Sara entered with a certain fine, regal step that she
-had, that gave at once a sense of the uselessness of opposing her.
-
-“Shut the door,” she commanded cheerfully, “and let me see you.
-Come, we will sit down and have a little talk. Oh, open that window
-first; there is some dreadful perfumery in the room. Ah, that’s
-nice; fresh air is the nicest sort of perfumery; don’t you think
-so?”
-
-The girl stared at her without an answer. She was a
-delicate-looking creature, rather pretty, except that just now her
-face was stained with tears, and there was a sullen look about her
-little pale lips. But she had fair hair in a sort of aureole around
-her low forehead, and shading her really beautiful eyes; and she
-wore a crimson silk waist,--spotted, to be sure, and ripped on the
-shoulder, but bringing out the fairness of her skin, and the blue
-veins on her delicate temples.
-
-“I’m sure I haven’t the pleasure of your acquaintance,” she said
-airily; but she was trembling.
-
-“I know your aunt, Mrs. Sherman,” her visitor said; then there
-was a moment’s silence. Sara Wharton looked about the untidy
-room,--with its banjo hung with ribbons, its looking-glass rimmed
-with cards and tintypes stuck edgewise within the frame; its litter
-of cigarette ends, and its half-empty, uncorked bottle of beer on
-the marble-topped centre-table.
-
-“Your aunt told me about you, my child,” she said, with a deep,
-kind look full into the girl’s face.
-
-The color rushed into Nellie’s pale cheeks; but she only said, with
-vast indifference, “Is that so? Well, she’s very kind, I’m sure.”
-
-“I don’t know that she has always been very kind,” Sara Wharton
-answered thoughtfully. “Now shut that window behind you; I don’t
-want you to sit in a draft; and the fresh air has driven out the
-perfumery. Why do you use perfumery, Nellie? Nice girls don’t.”
-
-The girl looked at her blankly.
-
-“Yes; your aunt told me about you. She told me how she had taken
-care of you ever since your mother died; and how she had sent
-you to school, and bought pretty dresses for you, and done the
-housework herself so that you shouldn’t spoil your hands; and how
-she took in washing so that you might go to dancing-school. She
-loved you very much, Nellie; but I am not sure that she was kind.
-Perhaps if you had had to work you wouldn’t have come to this
-dreadful house, and brought shame and disgrace to Mrs. Sherman.
-You’ve broken her heart, Nellie.”
-
-The girl’s face paled and flushed; and then quivered suddenly into
-a storm of tears.
-
-“_I_ don’t like it here. But I can’t help it. I lost my place in
-the shop. I was late, and they discharged me. And I was afraid to
-go home and tell my aunt, she jaws at me so. That was four weeks
-ago. It was the third place I’d lost. So I--came here. I don’t
-like it. I was just crying when you came in!” She squeezed her
-handkerchief into a damp ball and pressed it against her eyes,
-sobbing. “The woman is so cross. And--and I owe her for board.”
-
-Sara was silent.
-
-“But there ain’t anything I can do; I’d die rather than go back to
-my aunt’s. She’d never forgive me. I don’t blame her. But _I_ don’t
-like it here.”
-
-“Perhaps your aunt will forgive you?” Sara said gently. Nellie
-rocked back and forth, sobbing.
-
-“I’m too wicked,” she recited; her eyes roved over Sara’s dark
-dress, and inspected her pretty little bonnet, and dwelt on the
-glitter of an amethyst pin at her throat. “Oh, dear, I wish I
-hadn’t; I wish I was dead,” she said helplessly.
-
-Sara Wharton’s face lit with a quick tenderness. She put her arm
-over the child’s bent shoulders, and drew the wet cheek down
-against her breast. “My dear, if you are sorry, if you know that
-it is wicked and dreadful, then the worst is over. Don’t wish to
-die--wish to live, so that you may be good. I know you _can_ be
-good!” she ended, with a burst of courage in her voice, that
-struck some answering chord in the poor, half-developed little soul
-at her side. Nellie looked up.
-
-“Oh, I will be good--if I can; just get out of here! I’m just about
-sick, anyway; I’ve got such a pain under my left shoulder; and I’m
-just tired of it--and Mrs. Smith is so cross. But I can’t go home.
-My aunt’ll jaw at me. Oh, I can’t ever go home!” She whimpered a
-little, and looked at her pretty finger nails critically.
-
-“I’m _sure_ your aunt will forgive you!” Sara said, impetuous and
-tender. “Let’s go and ask her to, now.”
-
-“Mrs. Smith won’t let me go, I guess,” Nellie sighed; “I owe her
-two weeks board.”
-
-“I will pay her.”
-
-“I’ll come to-morrow,” the child demurred.
-
-“Nellie, dear, I want you to come now! Oh, Nellie, won’t you begin
-this minute to be good?”
-
-“I’m not so very bad,” Nellie protested, “and I can’t come now,
-truly. I haven’t any sack. I--sold it.” The tears welled up in her
-soft eyes at the remembrance of her poverty.
-
-“You don’t need a sack. You’ll come in my carriage, and I’ll wrap a
-rug around you.”
-
-“My!” said Nellie, “is your carriage here? One of the club girls
-told me it had satin cushions. Is that so, Miss Wharton?”
-
-Sara bit her lip. “Never mind about the cushions. Oh, Nellie, dear,
-don’t think of things like that! Only just try with all your might
-to be good. Will you, Nellie?”
-
-“Why, certainly,” said Nellie.
-
- * * * * *
-
-Sara Wharton drove home with a very serious look on her face. She
-had induced Nellie to leave that dreadful house; indeed, the girl
-had yielded with that fatally facile willingness to do what she was
-told which should have forbade any of the joy that may be felt over
-the one sinner that repenteth. But in the glow of “saving” the poor
-child, it was not easy for Sara Wharton to realize that Nellie’s
-first experience of sin had only reached the stage of the young
-smoker’s disgust with his first cigar. The young lady, with her
-carriage and her satin cushions, had come at the right moment--the
-moment when the expediency of morality had forced itself upon the
-girl’s little, flimsy common-sense, and she was willing to go
-shuddering back to comfortable decency; but as for any spiritual
-perception of sin, and righteousness, and judgment, it did not
-exist.
-
-Nellie had received her aunt’s forgiveness as though she were
-conferring a favor. Indeed, she sighed with some impatience when
-Mrs. Sherman wept over her; and she said again, fretfully, in
-response to Miss Wharton’s assertions that _now_ Nellie was going
-to be good,--“Why certainly, yes;” and looked about wearily, as if
-she wished the scene might come to an end.
-
-“Nobody shan’t never know, my darling,” Mrs. Sherman told her,
-her voice breaking with tenderness; “I’ll say you’ve been away,
-visiting friends.”
-
-“A’ right,” said Nellie. And neither the aunt nor the niece
-understood Miss Wharton’s quick protest against trying to hide one
-sin by another.
-
-Sara, driving home, tired and saddened by the emotions of the
-afternoon, acknowledged to herself that the easy repentance was
-made of still less value by the easy forgiveness.
-
-“But some day she will repent, really and truly,” she told herself;
-but she sighed, and dropped the window of the brougham, leaning
-forward to get the dash of wet, cold wind in her face. It seemed
-to her as though she still felt the lifeless air of those horrible
-halls and stairways, and the scent of musk, and tobacco smoke, and
-stale liquor.
-
-“The only thing to do, the only way to save her is to love her,”
-Sara Wharton said to herself, “and I’m going to love her!”
-
-When she reached home, and came in out of the cold dusk into the
-firelit hall, this divine intention of loving shone on her face
-with a beautiful solemnity. Her seriousness was so marked that her
-mother, who was just saying good evening to a departing caller,
-noticed it and said, with some anxiety:--
-
-“My dear, there is nothing the matter, I hope?”
-
-“No, mother darling,” the girl reassured her, with a glance at the
-tall fellow who stood with his hat and stick in his hand, waiting
-for Mrs. Wharton’s bow.
-
-“Sara, my dear, this is Dr. Morse. My daughter, Dr. Morse.”
-
-“I ventured to come and tell a sad story to your mother, Miss
-Wharton,” said the young man, “a dispensary story. I’ve just come
-on duty at the dispensary; but Mrs. Wharton’s kindness was so
-proverbial, that when I stumbled on a hard case, I came at once to
-tell her about it.”
-
-“I’ve no doubt she was delighted to hear of it,” Sara said; “mother
-would really be dreadfully unhappy if everybody was prosperous; her
-occupation would be gone.”
-
-“Why, Sara! Sara! you mustn’t say such things,” Mrs. Wharton
-reproved her, looking at her daughter over her gold spectacles,
-with the horrified protest of a simple and literal mind.
-
-The other two laughed, feeling suddenly very well acquainted.
-
-“So long as she lives in Mercer, Mrs. Wharton’s happiness is
-assured,” the doctor said; and went away, saying to himself, “What
-a girl! I don’t wonder people rave about her; she’s stunning! But
-I’m afraid she’s a professional philanthropist.”
-
-“So that’s the new doctor?” Sara said, pulling off her gloves; “he
-has a nice face, rather. Did you like him, darling?”
-
-“Yes,” her mother answered doubtfully, “only, Sara, my dear, he
-seems rather a stern young man. I wanted to give him a check for
-this poor woman he came to tell me about; but he said that I must
-let her clean windows, or something, to earn it. And you know, my
-dear child, that would interfere with James’s work. I’d much rather
-give the check than arrange for work.”
-
-Sara kissed her, and cuddled her, for Mrs. Wharton was a little,
-roly-poly, comfortable sort of woman, and told her she was behind
-the times.
-
-“Nowadays,” announced the young lady, “the ‘gave to him that
-asketh’ method is hopelessly unscientific; bless your dear
-old-fashioned heart!”
-
-
-II
-
-The saving of Nellie Sherman became an intense and passionate
-purpose in Sara Wharton’s life. Day by day, hour by hour, she
-watched and fought and prayed. She invented (according to the
-most approved charity methods) work for the vain and shiftless
-child; she had her taught to sew; she was careful to provide
-plenty of bright and wholesome amusement for her; by and by
-Nellie felt yearnings to be a bookkeeper, and Sara Wharton sent
-her to a commercial school. “You can pay me back when you get
-work,” she said, as cheerfully as though she believed that Nellie
-was capable of feeling a money obligation. She entered Nellie’s
-name at her Girls’ Club; she took her to concerts, and sent her
-books, and planned and thought and hoped; and always, always
-prayed. Furthermore, she loved the girl. That is to say, she
-called it love; and perhaps it was, in its way; at least it was
-that greater love that is content to give and not receive. Sara
-gave her very self--her power, her charm, her sweet and generous
-enthusiasms--fully and freely into the little, mean hands that
-were held out to take all they could get. “Because,” she said to
-herself, again, “the only way to reach her is to love her. Love is
-the greatest thing in the world! I’ve no doubt I would have been
-just as bad as Nellie if I hadn’t had so much love.” This thought
-made the girl rise, and go and push her mother’s sewing aside, and
-kiss her, with a little half laughing break in her voice, and her
-eyes suddenly wet with tears.
-
-“What is it? What is it?” Mrs. Wharton said breathlessly, adjusting
-her spectacles, which the impetuous embrace had disturbed; “is
-anything the matter, Sara?”
-
-“No,” her daughter answered, with a laugh, winking away the tears,
-“I was just thinking how lucky I was to have you for a mother, you
-darling! If I’d had some cross old mother I should have been--I
-should have been a fiend! I haven’t a doubt of it. I’d have been
-just as wicked as poor Nellie Sherman.”
-
-“Nothing of the sort!” retorted Mrs. Wharton, much ruffled; “please
-remember what kind of people your grand-parents on both sides were,
-and don’t say such unladylike things, Sara. Dear, dear, I don’t
-know what girls are coming to in these days. When I was young,
-young ladies didn’t know that such improper persons existed as your
-Nellie Sherman. I wish you would have nothing to do with her.”
-
-Sara, on her knees beside the little, rosy, kindly lady, pulled her
-cap straight, and scolded her for making her forefinger rough with
-so much sewing.
-
-“You are always making petticoats for poor people,” she said
-severely, “instead of talking to me about my winter clothes. I
-want a new dinner dress, ma’am, and you’ve got to buy it. I’ve
-used up all my allowance, and borrowed from father on the next
-quarter; so please help the deserving poor of your own household.
-Charity begins at home, let me tell you! Who is to have this
-petticoat?--while your own poor child is in want of a satin gown!”
-
-“Well,” Mrs. Wharton said, with some confusion, “the fact is,
-Nellie looks so sickly I am afraid she is not warmly enough clad”--
-
-Sara shrieked with laughter. “Consistency, thy name is Mother,”
-she cried; and began to pour out her plans for Nellie, which Mrs.
-Wharton amended several times, objecting to Sara’s assertion that
-Nellie should repay the money expended for her tuition at the
-commercial college.
-
-“The poor thing will have so little money, anyhow,” she entreated.
-But Sara held to her theory.
-
-“We’ll make it up in other ways,--petticoats, and things, but she
-must feel it a loan,” she said.
-
-However, Miss Wharton’s theories were far too fine for the material
-with which she worked. When the three terms at the commercial
-college were over, Nellie was languidly grateful, but she doubted
-whether she should like bookkeeping; she was, however, willing to
-“give it a trial;” so Sara found a place in a shop for her, and,
-as the proprietor (another friend and dependent) could not pay
-the full wages, made up the sum herself. But it never occurred to
-Nellie to begin to pay her debt; and Sara, fearful of antagonizing
-the child, cast her theory to the winds, and did not suggest it.
-
-So the first year passed. The anxious, courageous, artificial fight
-never flagged; and Nellie, for twelve months, was “straight.” There
-had been great expenditure of time and strength and money to save
-the little creature; and in a purely negative way the effort had
-been successful. Nellie was “straight.”
-
-Yet Sara Wharton was sometimes dreadfully discouraged; she could
-not see a single large or noble trait in the girl, although it was
-her sweet and loving theory to believe in what she did not see.
-
-“Goodness is there, somewhere!” she used to say to herself, with
-a beautiful and courageous belief which was part of her own
-character; and then she fell back on what she had called “the
-greatest thing in the world:” “Goodness is there, and I’ve got to
-_love it out_!” She took Nellie’s latent goodness for granted,
-especially in her effort to overcome the child’s enveloping
-selfishness. She was constantly trying to make her realize the
-happiness of sacrifice.
-
-“Nellie,” she said once, “now that you’ve got your place as
-bookkeeper, and are earning some money, of course you want to pay
-me; but I think, even before that, you must want to pay for your
-board at your aunt’s. She has been so good to you, you know; and
-I’m sure you’ll be glad to help her along a little?”
-
-“Oh, certainly!” Nellie replied, with a blank look.
-
-“How much do you think you can pay?” Sara suggested cheerfully.
-
-“Well, just now,” Nellie demurred, “I really have to have a new
-dress; perhaps, later, I can give her a little something.”
-
-Sara looked at her wistfully. “Don’t you _want_ to, Nellie? I
-should think your very first thought would be to do something for
-her. Just think what she has done for you!”
-
-“Of course, I mean to,” Nellie said, tossing her head, “but I’ve
-got to have a dress--and things.”
-
-“If only,” Sara reflected, “she could once understand how awfully
-nice it is to give!” and then she planned that every Saturday
-Nellie might come to the greenhouse and get some roses from the
-gardener,--“and take them to the hospital. It is delightful to
-do that!” she said. And Nellie smiled faintly, and said, “Oh,
-certainly;” but only came once for the flowers.
-
-Nevertheless, Nellie Sherman had been “rescued.” Almost the same
-sort of rescue would have been achieved if Sara had fastened her
-into a strait-jacket and locked her into a room. But with Miss
-Wharton on one side, and her aunt on the other, day and night, the
-strange, boneless, unmoral little nature “kept straight;” and in a
-glimmering way the girl even began to see that there were certain
-views which were thought admirable, and once in a while she tried
-them on, as it were, and regarded herself in the mirror of Miss
-Wharton’s warm and joyous approbation.
-
-“I was so sorry not to see you at the club last night, Nellie,”
-Sara said to her one day, dropping in to buy a pair of gloves at
-the shop where Nellie kept the books.
-
-“My aunt wasn’t well,” said Nellie, “and I stayed at home to take
-care of her.” Such a light came into Sara Wharton’s sweet face,
-such tenderness and triumph and quick hope, that Nellie looked at
-her curiously.
-
-“That was right, Nellie, dear,” she said; “I’m so glad you did it.
-I’m _so_ glad,” she repeated, and went away, her eyes misty and her
-heart lifted up. She could not help going in to see Mrs. Sherman,
-making the excuse of bringing her some fruit because she was ill,
-but really to share her exultation.
-
-“Sick?” said Mrs. Sherman, “why, no, ma’am, I’m not sick, no
-more than I always am with worry about that there Nellie. She
-didn’t come home from the club last night until after eleven, and
-I was scared to death for fear she’d gone off with them Caligan
-girls--they’re fast girls, that’s what they are; and she’s struck
-up a great friendship with ’em. My, she’ll worry me into my grave,
-Nellie will. But she said you’d kept her late to help you putting
-away the club books,--and of course that was all right.”
-
-
-III
-
-“You owe something to your family, my child,” Mrs. Wharton said one
-day; “you make us all very anxious and worried by overworking so;
-it’s your duty to take a little rest.”
-
-“Mother, darling,” Sara began to protest, “I really can’t go away
-now; the Girls’ Club and”--
-
-“You needn’t begin the list, my dear,” her mother interrupted--“I
-know them all. Dear, dear! Sara, when I was a girl, young women
-owed some duties to their parents, as well as to all the
-shiftless, worthless, improper people in the world.”
-
-“I trust I’m not a Borrioboola-Gha person,” murmured Sara.
-
-“Don’t be foolish, my child,” Mrs. Wharton said, “and use long
-words when your poor old mother don’t know what they mean”--
-
-“You darling!” said Sara, and hugged her so tightly that Mrs.
-Wharton remonstrated.
-
-“It would be a great deal more to the point if, instead of kissing
-me, you would be an obedient child. You worry me almost to death,
-working so hard. I want you to come to Florida. I asked Dr. Morse
-if he didn’t think you were doing too much, and he said you took a
-great deal of unnecessary trouble; so you see he agrees with me.”
-
-“Mother, dear, how you adore doctors! Dr. Morse doesn’t know what
-he’s talking about. But you might tell me what else he said?”
-
-“Oh, some nonsense about--about your being of so much value to
-Mercer,” Mrs. Wharton admitted, with evident fear that one
-statement might lessen the effect of the other.
-
-But whether it was Dr. Morse’s understanding of the value of her
-work, or whether it was her mother’s entreaties, Sara at last
-agreed to go away for a little while, though it was hard work
-to get things in running order for a three months’ absence of
-their head. Nellie was her greatest anxiety; three months without
-oversight and guidance--who could tell what might happen! So Sara
-made many plans; the girl was to be guarded on this side and on
-that: she was to have steady work, and she was to have frequent
-amusement; pleasure and profit were all arranged. And before she
-went, Sara had a little talk with her. She had sent for the girl,
-who came up into her bedroom, where, just before dinner, Miss
-Wharton was sitting in the firelight. The pretty room was full of
-dusky shadows; its faint scent of roses, its deep, soft chairs, the
-shimmer of silver on the toilet-table, all its delicate luxury,
-was evident enough to Nellie. The sullen upper lip swelled out as
-she looked enviously about her. She liked the touch of the silk
-cushions, the feeling of the soft white rug under her feet; the
-color of Miss Wharton’s crimson tea-gown fed her eyes with delight.
-She hardly heard what the young lady was saying.
-
-“Nellie, dear, I want you to try your very best to be good while
-I’m away.”
-
-“Oh, certainly,” said Nellie, with a sigh.
-
-Sara clasped her hands together over her knees, and held her lip
-between her teeth, drawing in her breath; Nellie watched her rings
-wink and flash in the firelight.
-
-“Nellie” (Sara was saying to herself, “Oh, I _hope_ I will say what
-is wise. I _hope_ I can touch her!”), “Nellie, you know how I have
-always believed in you, and hoped for you, and loved you; and just
-because I have, and because I am truly, truly your friend, I want
-to ask you to do two things for me while I’m away: first, promise
-me not to tell another lie; oh, Nellie, you don’t know how unhappy
-you made me when you told me that lie about the club.”
-
-Nellie dropped her head upon her breast, and made no answer.
-
-“And then,” Sara went on, “I want you to try not to be so selfish.
-I am so grieved to have you indifferent to Mrs. Sherman’s kindness
-to you. She told me that you had only given her one dollar and
-seventy-five cents since you went to work. And don’t you see, you
-have been receiving everything she could give you, of love and
-care, and yet you have given her nothing! You haven’t even been
-kind to her, Nellie.”
-
-“_Oh!_” said Nellie, “well, I wish I was dead. Everybody’s always
-finding fault. I’m sure there’s lots of girls worse than me. But
-I’m always being picked at. I wish I was dead.”
-
-Sara was nervous and overstrained; besides, she was conscious of a
-sort of physical disgust at this poor, repulsive little being; her
-self-reproach brought the tears to her eyes. “I didn’t mean to be
-hard on you, Nellie,” she said, “only I want you to try.”
-
-“I _always_ try,” said Nellie.
-
-“And,” Sara’s brave young voice went on, “I do want you to feel
-that--that Christ cares; that God cares, Nellie, that you shall be
-a good, true, dear girl. Will you just think of that, Nellie?”
-
-“Why, of course,” Nellie answered resentfully, wiping her eyes. “I
-do always. My aunt makes me go to church every Sunday. Miss Sara,
-do you think you have any pieces of velvet in your rag-bag?”
-
-Sara started. “Rag-bag?” she repeated vaguely, “velvet?”
-
-“I thought I could trim my hat over,” Nellie explained. “You’ve got
-so many things,” she ended sullenly.
-
-Sara was silent for a few minutes, reasoning with herself. After
-all, Nellie was young; it was natural for her to like pretty things.
-
-“Yes, I can give you some velvet, I think,” she said cheerfully;
-“and, Nellie, I have a plan for you; what are you going to give
-your aunt for a Christmas gift?”
-
-Nellie looked up blankly.
-
-“I know you’ll want to give her something,” Sara went on, “and I
-was thinking of a nice chair. What do you think of that?”
-
-“A chair!” repeated Nellie in astonishment. “Why, I wouldn’t buy a
-chair for myself!”
-
-Sara sighed. “But you would like the fun of buying one for somebody
-else, wouldn’t you?”
-
-“Well, I ain’t got any money,” the girl said uneasily; and then
-Miss Wharton unfolded her plan, which was that she should give
-Nellie five dollars, and Nellie would add what she could, and a
-present should be purchased.
-
-“Add something, if it’s only a dollar,” Sara said pleadingly; “a
-good, comfortable chair can be bought for six dollars.”
-
-“A’ right; I don’t mind,” Nellie agreed, in a wearied way. She did
-not understand all this talk; she saw no reason in Miss Sara’s
-giving Mrs. Sherman a chair, and saying it was Nellie’s gift;
-still, she didn’t mind.
-
-“You’ll like to do that, won’t you, Nellie?” Sara said anxiously.
-
-“Oh, certainly,” said Nellie, and then she rose, for Miss Wharton
-was silent, and that seemed a sign of dismissal.
-
-Sara rose, too, and stood looking at her visitor for a moment;
-then, suddenly she put her arm around the little thin shoulders,
-and drew the girl to her, and kissed her. “Oh, Nellie,” she said,
-her voice passionate and trembling,--“Oh, Nellie, _dear_! I--I
-wish I knew what to say, to show you--to make you feel”--her voice
-broke; Nellie was greatly embarrassed;--“but just believe _I love
-you_, won’t you? and be good!”
-
-“Why,” said Nellie, with a sigh of fatigue and reproach,
-“certainly!” Then she added, “Well, good-by; hope you’ll have a
-delightful time, I’m sure,” and closed Miss Sara’s door, with a
-sense of relief that was like the lifting of some harassing weight.
-She came slowly downstairs, pulling on her soiled gloves, and
-walking with a mincing step. Escaped from Miss Wharton’s room,
-she felt as if all the luxury of this great house--the color,
-the lights, the soft carpet under her feet, the sparkle of the
-firelight in the hall below--was hers, and so she assumed the
-gait and the manner which she conceived to belong to an owner. The
-inside-man was just lighting a lamp under a big rose-colored shade,
-and Nellie threw up her head with a haughty look, and drew down the
-corners of her mouth, sweeping past him toward the door. James,
-however, smiled with great politeness.
-
-“Oh, g’d evening, Miss Sherman,” he said. “My! it does seem to get
-dark early these days, doesn’t it?”
-
-Nellie’s lofty coldness melted instantly. She simpered and said,
-“Is that so?”
-
-“It’s quite late for a young lady to be out alone,” James remarked
-with grave solicitude.
-
-“Oh, that’s a’ right,” Nellie protested.
-
-She was smiling, and holding her head coquettishly, and looking up
-at him with great archness. She dropped her handkerchief as she
-reached the front door and James picked it up, and handed it to her
-with an elaborate bow. He caught her fingers in his own as he did
-so, and they both giggled, and Nellie said, “Now, you stop that!”
-
-They lowered their voices with an apprehensive look towards the
-staircase; James opened the door and stepped out on the porch with
-her. “Well, you oughtn’t to be severe, Miss Sherman; it’s such a
-little hand, a gentleman can’t help it; Miss Sara’s is twice as
-big.”
-
-“Is that so?” said Nellie; and then they both looked up at the
-sky, and James observed that the weather was threatening, and it
-certainly _was_ too dark for a young lady, a beautiful young lady,
-to be out alone.
-
-“Oh, that’s a’ right,” Nellie reassured him politely.
-
-James in an absent-minded way put his arm round her, and said he
-thought ladies ought always to have gentlemen escorts.
-
-“Is that so?” Nellie answered, simpering; and, with the same
-apparent absence of mind, sidling closer to him, which induced
-his easy caresses; “well, I must be going along,” she announced,
-giggling.
-
-“Well, good-by, Miss Sherman,” said the chivalrous James, and gave
-her a hearty kiss, which made Nellie slap at him with one hand,
-and say, “Now you stop that!” and go off, still giggling, into the
-darkness.
-
- * * * * *
-
-Sara Wharton, upstairs by her fire, had dropped her face in her
-hands, and was saying to herself, “I must trust her more, and
-believe in her more! Oh, I am sure she tries--poor little Nellie.”
-
-And certainly poor Nellie was not conscious of any lack of trying,
-so far as the episode with James was concerned. To her, as well as
-to him, it was very harmless, that kiss in the porch. And really to
-call such a thing “sin” is to lift it to a level where it does not
-belong.
-
-But probably Sara Wharton was constitutionally unable to understand
-that.
-
-The people who try to make silk purses out of inadequate materials
-rarely can understand it.
-
-
-IV
-
-The Whartons did not get back until April, and the improvement in
-Sara’s color, and the clear, glad look in her eyes, showed how
-much she had needed the change. She was all ready for her brave,
-happy work for other people. Her very first visit was to Nellie’s
-aunt. When she climbed up to the top tenement, stopping to open a
-window on a landing half way up, so that the sweet spring air might
-turn out the odors of the hall-sink, and of the dirt in the corners
-and on the stairs, she came into Mrs. Sherman’s room a little
-breathless, but with a soft rose-color on her cheek.
-
-“Well!” she called out cheerfully, “here I am again, Mrs. Sherman;
-how are you; and how is Nellie?” and then she discovered Nellie
-sitting close to the stove, on which was a tin boiler full of
-steaming soapy linen, which Mrs. Sherman, bare armed and draggled,
-pushed down once in a while with a broom-handle.
-
-“There!” said Mrs. Sherman, “well! my sakes, Miss Wharton, it do do
-me good to see you. Look at that there girl!”
-
-Nellie sunk her head on her breast and began to cry. Sara was
-instantly serious. “Is anything wrong?” she said gravely.
-
-“Wrong!” cried Mrs. Sherman shrilly. “Well, I guess! I told her I’d
-keep her till you come home, though she’s a shame to any decent
-woman. My! what I’ve put up with for that there child!” She put her
-apron over her head, sobbing and vociferating: “I told her I’d tell
-you. I ain’t let her out of that door since. I’ll keep her straight
-now, as long as _I_ live”--
-
-Nellie, her face drawn and pale, sat plucking at the fringe of the
-shawl about her shoulders, her sullen lips compressed, her eyes
-cast resolutely down.
-
-“Nellie?” Sara said. There was no answer.
-
-“What has happened, Nellie?”
-
-Silence.
-
-“Tell me; I won’t be hard on you, Nellie. Have you--gone wrong
-again?”
-
-Nellie crossed her feet and made no reply.
-
-In despair Sara turned again to Mrs. Sherman, who, with tears,
-declaring first that Nellie should leave her house that night,
-and then that she would never let her out of her sight, told the
-shameful fact of another fall;--another reformation.
-
-“She’s sick, that’s what’s the matter; that’s all her reformin’
-amounts to,” the aunt said; “she was bleedin’ from her lungs, so
-she come home. She was gone a week. It was two weeks last Thursday
-she come back. Well, I thought she was dyin’. I was up with her
-three nights. I sent for that there doctor at the dispensary. He
-give her some stuff. That’s it in the bottle on the mantel. Well,
-I didn’t let on to him how she’d been carryin’ on! Shame on her!
-I’m done with her. She can go out to the gutter. That’s where she
-belongs”--
-
-“Oh, Mrs. Sherman,” Sara protested, her color coming and going.
-“Nellie, how could you! oh, Nellie!” She looked over at the girl
-with a sort of passionate disappointment and pity, yet with that
-physical shrinking which the good woman feels in the presence of
-the bad woman. With illness Nellie’s vanity had ebbed; she was
-untidy, her hands were dirty; she had not frizzed her hair for
-days, and it hung about her dull face in lifeless strands.
-
-“Well,” Mrs. Sherman burst out, “there! She’s broke my heart.
-Nellie, it’s time for your medicine. She ain’t got no appetite,
-Miss Wharton. I don’t know what I _shall_ do!” The woman’s worn
-face quivered with tears. Nellie got up and took her medicine; she
-glanced at the hem of Miss Wharton’s skirt, but would not lift her
-eyes any higher. The clothes on the stove boiled, and the suds
-splashed over and sizzled on the hot iron. Mrs. Sherman, talking
-and crying, rammed them down with the clothes-stick.
-
-“I couldn’t believe it at first. She’d kep’ straight for more ’an
-a year an’ a half. But she got to goin’ with a lot o’ them fast
-girls, and she spent every cent she had on her back”--
-
-Sara looked around suddenly. “Did she give you a present of a chair
-at Christmas?”
-
-“A chair? No; she never gave me nothing. Not a thing. You told
-her she’d got to pay me board. I’d ’a’ been satisfied with that,
-and not ’a’ wanted no presents of chairs. Well, I took her out of
-her dyin’ mother’s arms, and I’ve lived to see the day I wished
-she’d a-died then, with my poor, blessed sister. _She_ made a
-misstep, I will say; and the man made off and left her. But she was
-expectin’ to marry him. It was different from this one. _I’ve_ been
-a respectable woman all my life, and I can’t stand the shame of
-this,--the neighbors’ll know,” she rambled on, crying and jabbing
-at the steaming clothes, and looking with furtive, dumb love at the
-little, sick, mean face on the other side of the stove.
-
-As for Sara Wharton, she went home heart-sick, but gathering up her
-courage and her faith for further effort; this time to save the
-body as well as the soul.
-
-The first thing to be done was, plainly, to see the doctor at the
-dispensary, who had already examined Nellie.
-
-“I’ll have to tell him the truth about her,” Sara thought,
-frowning. But it never occurred to her to shirk this.
-
-“Yes, I remember the case, I think,” said Dr. Morse; “incipient
-phthisis, I believe. Just let me look it up; yes, that was it;
-anæmia, also; I gave her a tonic.”
-
-“Phthisis?” Sara repeated, her color paling. “Oh, Dr. Morse,
-doesn’t that mean--consumption?”
-
-“Not yet,” he answered, with all the cheerfulness of scientific
-indifference. “It will doubtless develop into consumption.”
-
-“But that means she will _die_?” Sara said, her dark eyes full of
-fear. “Oh, is it as bad as that?” Her lip trembled. The young man
-looked at her with attention.
-
-“I am sorry I told you so abruptly; I did not realize that the
-young woman was anything to you, personally; and I assure you the
-case is not hopeless.”
-
-“Is there any hope? Oh, Dr. Morse, it is so awful to think of her
-dying _now_! What must be done? How uneven things are! There was I,
-a strong, well woman, down in Florida, and this poor girl”--
-
-“There is perhaps some difference in the value of the two lives,”
-the doctor objected, smiling. Sara brushed this aside as unworthy
-of an answer.
-
-“What can we do?”
-
-“Well, I suppose if she could go away into the country, and live
-a quiet, regular life, with plenty of milk to drink, and plenty
-of fresh air and proper exercise, she would at least be greatly
-benefited. Possibly cured. There are no marked lesions, I think, in
-the lung.”
-
-Sara listened with frowning intentness; then she drew a long breath
-of relief. “I am so thankful that it is not hopeless. But I think
-that--that in prescribing for her, I mean planning for her, you
-ought to know--all there is to know, about her.”
-
-“Yes, that is advisable,” the doctor agreed easily. The charming
-color of her cheek, the bunch of violets on her shoulder, her
-beautiful, troubled brown eyes, were not lost upon this young man.
-“I thought her a vain little thing,” he went on, “and rather brutal
-to the good woman who was taking care of her. But illness makes us
-all selfish.”
-
-“I am afraid she is vain, poor child,” Sara said, “and selfish,
-too, rather. But the worst of it is, she has--she has not been
-good, Dr. Morse.”
-
-“Ah!” said the young man.
-
-“I did hope she had reformed, but while I was away--it happened
-again.”
-
-“I see. I see.”
-
-“Of course, in sending her away that has to be considered. She must
-be among people who will do her good.”
-
-“And to whom she will not do harm.”
-
-Sara looked a little startled. “Of course; but I had not thought of
-that.”
-
-“It seems to me that is very important,” he said, smiling.
-“Speaking of sending people away, I wish I might tell you of
-another case which needs the country; or are your hands too full to
-consider any one else?”
-
-“Alas, it is my purse which is not full,” she said ruefully; “but
-is it very bad?”
-
-“It is a poor soul, a hard-working, honest little creature, who has
-an old mother and an imbecile brother to support; and she’s nearly
-at an end of her strength. She needs to be braced up.”
-
-“I wish I could send her away too,” Sara said pitifully; “but I’ve
-begged and begged for my cases until, positively, I haven’t the
-face to ask for any more money. My friends fly when they see me
-approaching, for fear I’m going to say ‘give, give!’” She laughed a
-little, and the doctor looked at her with critical amusement.
-
-“But of the two, you’d give the--you’d give Nellie Sherman the
-chance for health?”
-
-“Why, it’s only ‘bracing up’ that your poor woman needs,” Sara
-said, with a surprised look, “and you say Nellie will die if she
-doesn’t go away?”
-
-“Perhaps that would be the best thing that could happen.”
-
-“Dr. Morse! Would you have me let Nellie Sherman _die_, that three
-people should be made comfortable?”
-
-“I would, indeed,” he said, with a whimsical smile.
-
-She looked at him in silent dismay, and he thought she shrank a
-little.
-
-“My dear Miss Wharton,” he said quickly, “just look at the
-situation: your poor Nellie is a moral leper; she is a contagion;
-she’s had her opportunity to get well (I speak spiritually);
-she has had a year and a half of the most patient and earnest
-effort expended upon her; but she hasn’t profited by it, and the
-probability is she is incurable. On the other hand, here is a woman
-who is a centre and source of moral health. Each needs physical
-restoration: one for her life, the other for her usefulness,--and,
-later, no doubt, her life, too. To which shall the chance be given?”
-
-“To the one who might die!” Sara said impetuously.
-
-She got up to go, a sparkle of indignation in her eyes; the young
-man rose, too, and stood leaning back against his office table, his
-hands in his pockets, and a good-natured smile on his lean, strong
-face. “I don’t see,” his visitor went on, “how you dare to say any
-soul is incurably bad”--
-
-“I only said the _probability_ was that your Nellie was incurable;
-and, after all, if you have only a certain amount of medicine, will
-you give it to the moribund or the person who is just coming down
-with an illness?”
-
-“I don’t think the illustration is good,” Sara answered loftily;
-“we are speaking of souls. And we have no right to say we know the
-limit”--her voice fell a little--“of God’s power.”
-
-Dr. Morse looked as though he were about to speak, but apparently
-thought better of it.
-
-“I’m very sorry for your poor woman,” Sara said, “and I’ll try to
-see if I can’t arrange a little rest for her; but first of all,
-life must be saved.”
-
-Then she went away, her lip between her white teeth, and her breath
-quick. “Horrible man!” she said to herself, “the idea of reasoning
-about a thing like that--a human life! Dreadful person! I hope I
-shall never see him again.”
-
-Dr. Morse, in his office, thrust his hands down into his pockets,
-and stretched his feet out, and reflected. “I suppose she
-thinks I’m a brute. I might have known better than to talk to a
-sentimental girl as though she were a rational being. She’ll keep
-that creature alive long enough to bring two or three fellows
-down to the gutter, and, possibly, even continue her physical and
-moral characteristics in a child (though that’s not likely, thank
-heaven), and then feel that she’s done _her_ duty! Good Lord, the
-harm these philanthropists do!”
-
-Nevertheless he softened a little when a short and formal note came
-from Miss Wharton, with a small sum of money for “the case of which
-he had spoken.”
-
-“She’s got a good heart, that girl,” he told himself. “Her ten
-dollars won’t do much, though; and to think of that little squalid
-Nellie Sherman having a hundred spent to keep her worthless body
-alive!”
-
-
-V
-
-So Nellie’s summer outing was arranged: she was to have four months
-in a quiet place in the country; plenty of fresh air, and good
-milk, and wholesome food.
-
-No wonder the little pale cheeks grew round and faintly pink; that
-her eyes seemed darker and brighter; her pinched, white lips
-fuller and redder. In a month it was evident that the quiet life
-which Sara had taken such pains to find was good for her; her whole
-miserable, sickly body began to thrive. It was a “quiet” life.
-From the girl’s point of view it was perfectly intolerable. She
-endured, in her way, the misery of the intellectual man or woman
-cut off absolutely from books or study of any kind, or of a clean
-person obliged to live in filth. The contrast was as great. The
-fact that it was in favor of righteousness did not make it any
-the less painful. Nellie’s sudden removal from the cheap and base
-excitements of her life caused absolute suffering. Such suffering,
-untempted reformers argue, is good for the soul.
-
-But to Nellie the sweet drift of silent summer days was maddeningly
-dull; she brooded over what she felt was the hardship of her lot,
-and looked back upon her Mercer life as a time of freedom, and
-of a strange sort of importance,--which was as near self-respect
-as she could come. At least, in Mercer she was not “trod on,” as
-she now felt herself to be; she could go and walk the street on
-fine afternoons with the Caligan girls, three abreast, arm in
-arm, strutting and jostling each other, and looking into the shop
-windows; laughing loudly, or glancing haughtily at the passers-by,
-or giggling at “gentlemen friends.” It was all so harmless and
-so pleasant! Of course, Mrs. Smith’s on Baker Street, that was
-different; but just to meet lady and gentlemen friends, and talk
-and “carry on”--what was wrong in that? She did, to be sure, feel
-nervous about her health; but if it were necessary to go into the
-country, why couldn’t she have gone to a hotel, where she could
-have had some fun? It seemed a cruel life to Nellie! She came to
-feel toward Sara Wharton, instead of the uncomfortable resentment
-which in such natures takes the place of gratitude, a venomous
-hatred. Sara seemed to this poor, mean soul, a powerful enemy,
-one who interfered with every joy, and, not content with that,
-who “talked;” and Nellie hated talk. Like most of her class,
-except when in a rage, she had little to say beyond exclamations,
-and Miss Wharton’s impetuous flow of words, her entreaties, and
-rebukes, and suggestions, had only bewildered and irritated the
-girl; for Sara, like most of her class, had never taken Nellie’s
-mental deficiencies into account; she treated her always like a
-rational being. Like a “Soul,” Sara herself would have said.
-
-So, up on the farm, as her fright about her health subsided, poor
-Nellie raged against her benefactor and her cruel fate. She fell
-into fits of weeping, or, what was worse to the quiet husband and
-wife in whose charge she was, into long silences, broken only by
-fitful flashes of black temper. Yet in spite of this, her bodily
-health increased. Very likely there would have been open rebellion,
-and a break for liberty by midsummer, if an unexpected interest
-had not come into her life. Two students, with their tutor, came
-to camp out near the farm; and after passing them once or twice
-in the road, and giggling with them over the posting of a letter
-in the office, poor Nellie grew better tempered. She frizzed her
-hair with keener enjoyment, and practiced airs and graces before
-her glass all the long hot forenoons; and in the afternoons walked
-in to the village on the remote chance of meeting the two boys.
-She did not see them often, but to know they were near gave her
-something to think about in the deadly monotony of farm life, and
-she was much happier. On the rare occasions of their meeting she
-would roll her eyes, and talk in her simpering, nasal voice of the
-weather, or the novel she had been reading, or how her “guardian”
-had sent her into the country for her health. The boys said to each
-other that she was pretty, and ripping good fun; and used to laugh
-over her silliness with their tutor. They were too busy and too
-wholesomely happy to give very much thought to her.
-
-Thus the summer passed. The health which Sara Wharton so earnestly
-desired had returned, temporarily at least. When at last the
-first of September came, and Miss Wharton’s letter arrived to
-say she might come home,--such a gentle, friendly, sympathetic
-letter,--Nellie was wild with delight. She could hardly remember
-to say good-by to the kind people who had looked after her for the
-last few months; she almost forgot the boys; she was tremulous with
-joy.
-
-“Oh, I’m so _glad_ to go back--oh, I hate, hate, _hate_ the
-country!” she kept saying; while the husband and wife looked at
-each other wonderingly.
-
-So, strengthened and invigorated, panting for excitement, unchecked
-by any moral perceptions, by gratitude, by love, even by fear (now
-that she was well again),--she came back to Mercer.
-
-
-VI
-
-One night in December, Sara Wharton, coming home from a dinner, was
-told that Dr. Morse was waiting for her in the library. She went
-in at once, pulling off her long gloves, and with her white cloak
-falling back from her pretty shoulders. She had not seen the doctor
-since that talk about Nellie, and she had forgotten her indignation
-with him. She had heard too much of his goodness among the poor
-people to harbor resentment.
-
-“Oh, I am so sorry to be so late,” she said. “Have you been waiting
-very long? Oh, this room is cold! Why haven’t they kept the fire
-up?” She turned, with a pretty, hospitable impulse to summon a
-servant, but Dr. Morse stopped her with a gesture.
-
-“I am quite warm. I will only detain you for a few moments. I want
-you to help me.”
-
-“Indeed, I will; has anything gone wrong?”
-
-“Yes,” he said, with a hard look.
-
-“One of your poor people?” she asked. She sat down by the fire, one
-silken foot on the fender; her cloak had slipped down behind her,
-and she was pulling out her gloves, and smoothing them on her knee.
-She looked up at him with a charming smile.
-
-“Yes,” he said, “one of my poor people--and yours. Miss Wharton,
-can you tell me anything about Nellie Sherman?”
-
-“Nellie?” Sara Wharton’s face began to change. “Oh, Dr. Morse, I
-wish I could tell you anything encouraging about her. She quarreled
-with her aunt, and went to work at a factory in North Mercer. She
-hardly ever comes home, I’m sorry to say; she is boarding with a
-respectable family, I believe, and I think she does not depend on
-Mrs. Sherman for any money. But I’ve lost my hold on her--if I
-ever had any! She has only been to see me once since she came home
-in September. You know I sent her away in the summer? And she got
-well, Dr. Morse!” she ended triumphantly.
-
-“Yes; she did,” he said with stern significance.
-
-“What is the matter? Is she sick again? is she--_dead_?”
-
-“Dead? I wish she were.”
-
-“Dr. Morse!”
-
-“Miss Wharton, that miserable creature has lived long enough to
-corrupt and seduce an innocent boy. Young Jack Hayes has--I beg
-your pardon, this is plain talk--but I am a physician and you
-are--a philanthropist, so we need not mince words,--Jack has gone
-off with her. I have come to-night from his mother’s bedside. Mrs.
-Hayes has just heard what he has done--her innocent boy.”
-
-Sara rose, shrinking and wincing as though he had struck her.
-
-“I thought it possible,” he went on, “that you might know where she
-was living, and perhaps I could get on her track. She met Jack up
-in the country; he was there with a tutor; of course, she had no
-difficulty in finding him when he came back to town. He went off
-with her on Sunday, we think--at least, one of the Clay boys saw
-him with her Sunday night, and he hasn’t been at home since.”
-
-“I don’t know where she is,” Sara said brokenly.
-
-“I went to see Mrs. Sherman before I came here, and do you know
-what she said to me? She sat, poor woman, with the tears streaming
-down her cheeks: ‘Oh,’ she said, ‘if I could only know she was
-dead! If she was just safe in her grave!’”
-
-Sara shivered.
-
-“I thought to myself, ‘She would be, you poor soul, if some of us
-wise people had not interfered.’ I reproach myself,” he went on
-savagely, “that I did not try to dissuade you when you told me you
-meant to keep the girl alive. We ought to stamp such vermin out--or
-let it die out, at least. Instead, you philanthropists and we
-doctors do all we can to keep them alive,--that they may propagate
-their kind! Fortunately, nature generally prevents that,--but
-Nellie’s mother was a fallen woman, you may remember? Poor
-Jack--poor Mrs. Hayes! Miss Wharton, our hands are not innocent of
-that boy’s blood.”
-
-Sara was very white; she still trembled, but she lifted her head
-and looked full at him. “Dr. Morse, are you God, to kill?”
-
-“Or you, to make alive?” he interrupted. “I did not ask you to
-kill--I asked you not to interfere--to allow God to work in his own
-way. I asked you to use that judgment which, in ordinary affairs,
-is so excellent--to consider _probabilities_; you do as much as
-that in refusing to leave a lighted candle in a powder magazine.
-What would you think of me, if I turned a smallpox patient loose
-in a crowd? Nellie is far more dangerous than smallpox. Don’t you
-see--surely you must see! that it would have been better for the
-community if she had died last summer?”
-
-“Better for the community,” Sara said passionately; “but what about
-Nellie? Would it have been better for Nellie?”
-
-“It could hardly be worse, could it?” he answered dryly; “but if it
-were worse, better one lost soul than two or three.”
-
-“God doesn’t lose souls so easily,” she cried; but he pressed the
-logic of her hope home.
-
-“Then why not have trusted Him, and let her die? Death isn’t
-the worst thing in the world! And may I remind you”--they had
-both risen; and from a cruel sort of justice on his part, and a
-horrified dismay on hers, anger was arising in their eyes--“may I
-remind you of a poor woman of whom I spoke that day you came to see
-me about Nellie? She is in the hospital, broken down absolutely;
-her brother is in the almshouse, and her mother living on charity.
-But Nellie Sherman, a thief, a liar, a prostitute, a moral
-imbecile, is in good health!”
-
-“You have no right to say such things,” Sara said, in a low voice.
-“I had to give that poor creature a chance to save her soul; and to
-do that I had to save her body”--
-
-“And ruin Jack--body and soul”--
-
-“That was not my business,” she flung back at him.
-
-“It was your business!” he said. “It was your business to weigh
-probabilities. Oh!” he ended, impetuously, “the trouble with us
-is, nowadays, that we make too much of _life_, and too little of
-_living_. It is living that is important, not existing! I tell you,
-Miss Wharton, there is only a limited amount of power in the world;
-only a limited amount of opportunity, or of money, for that matter;
-and we are bound to put power and opportunity and money where they
-will do the most good! Did you put them where they would do the
-most good?”
-
-Sara flinched, then rallied all her faith. “Dr. Morse, I did the
-duty which came to my hands; I had no choice.”
-
-“No choice?” he repeated. “There is always choice! that’s where
-responsibility comes in. The good woman and the bad woman may not
-come and stand hand in hand before you, each asking aid. But the
-good woman, abstractly, is always dying (or--being tempted to turn
-into a bad woman, for that matter!), so there is always choice.
-We’ve got to consider moral economics; we’ve no business to gratify
-our selfish sentimentalism at the expense of society!” He was so
-much in earnest that he did not see how tensely she was holding
-herself, or what a look of terror had come into her young face.
-
-“The Gospel of Love is all I can plead,” she said, in the voice of
-one insisting to herself; “but it is the salvation of the world!”
-
-All the stern anxiety of his face melted into an exaltation as
-intense as her own. “Law is the salvation of the world! And
-law means that the good of the whole, not the comfort of the
-individual, shall be considered; it means a love so sane as to
-permit the mercy of death.”
-
-Sara put her hands over her face to hide a burst of tears. Her
-accuser ground his teeth in helpless discomfort.
-
-“I’m right,” he said doggedly, “but I’m a brute; I wish you would
-forgive me.”
-
-She turned from him, unable to speak. He wanted to follow her, to
-comfort her; to say, as one does to a child or a woman, “Never
-mind,”--but he dared not.
-
-“I’m sorry I’ve wounded you,” he said again miserably; “I hope you
-will forgive me?”
-
-“Forgive you?” she turned and faced him, the tears on her face; “I
-haven’t anything to forgive. Do you suppose I care how you talk to
-_me_?--if I am right? oh, _if_ I am right!”
-
-
-
-
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-<pre>
-
-The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Wisdom of Fools, by Margaret Deland
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
-other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
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-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
-to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
-
-Title: The Wisdom of Fools
-
-Author: Margaret Deland
-
-Release Date: November 23, 2016 [EBook #53579]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE WISDOM OF FOOLS ***
-
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-Produced by MFR, John Campbell and the Online Distributed
-Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was
-produced from images generously made available by The
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-</pre>
-
-
-
-<div class="transnote">
-<p><strong>TRANSCRIBER’S NOTE</strong></p>
-
-<p>Obvious typographical errors and punctuation errors have been
-corrected after careful comparison with other occurrences within
-the text and consultation of external sources.</p>
-
-<p>All misspellings in the text, and inconsistent or archaic usage,
-have been retained.</p>
-</div>
-
-
-<hr class="chap pg-brk" />
-<p class="p6" />
-<div class="bbox">
-<p class="pfs150 antiqua">Books by Margaret Deland.</p>
-
-<hr class="r20a" />
-
-<p>
-THE OLD GARDEN, AND OTHER VERSES.<br />
-Enlarged Edition. 16mo, gilt top, $1.25.</p>
-
-<p>THE OLD GARDEN, AND OTHER VERSES.<br />
-<em>Holiday Edition.</em> Illustrated in color by
-<span class="smcap">Walter Crane</span>. Crown 8vo, $4.00.</p>
-
-<p>JOHN WARD, PREACHER. A Novel. 16mo,
-$1.25; paper, 50 cents.</p>
-
-<p>SIDNEY. A Novel. 16mo, $1.25; paper, 50 cts.</p>
-
-<p>THE STORY OF A CHILD. 16mo, $1.00.</p>
-
-<p>MR. TOMMY DOVE, AND OTHER STORIES.
-16mo, $1.00.</p>
-
-<p>PHILIP AND HIS WIFE. A Novel. 16mo,
-$1.25.</p>
-
-<p>THE WISDOM OF FOOLS. Stories. 16mo,
-$1.25.</p>
-
-<p class="p1 pfs100">
-HOUGHTON, MIFFLIN &amp; CO.</p>
-
-<p class="center smcap">Boston and New York.</p>
-
-</div>
-<p class="p6" />
-
-
-<hr class="chap pg-brk" />
-
-<h1>THE WISDOM OF FOOLS</h1>
-
-<p class="p4 pfs80">BY</p>
-
-<p class="p2 pfs135">MARGARET DELAND</p>
-
-<p class="p4" />
-<div class="figcenter">
-<img src="images/colophon.jpg" width="150" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<p class="p4 pfs90">BOSTON AND NEW YORK<br />
-HOUGHTON, MIFFLIN AND COMPANY<br />
-MDCCCXCVII</p>
-
-
-<hr class="chap pg-brk" />
-<p class="p6" />
-
-<p class="pfs80 lht">COPYRIGHT, 1897,<br />
-BY MARGARET DELAND<br />
-ALL RIGHTS RESERVED</p>
-
-<p class="p6" />
-
-
-<hr class="chap pg-brk" />
-<p class="p6" />
-
-<h2 class="no-brk"><a name="CONTENTS" id="CONTENTS">CONTENTS</a></h2>
-
-<div class="center fs90">
-<table border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="6" summary="">
-<tr><td class="tdl"></td><td class="tdr xs">PAGE</td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdl">WHERE IGNORANCE IS BLISS, ’TIS FOLLY TO BE WISE</td><td class="tdr"><a href="#WHERE_IGNORANCE_IS_BLISS">3</a></td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdl">THE HOUSE OF RIMMON</td><td class="tdr"><a href="#THE_HOUSE_OF_RIMMON">66</a></td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdl">COUNTING THE COST</td><td class="tdr"><a href="#COUNTING_THE_COST">136</a></td></tr>
-<tr><td class="tdl">THE LAW, OR THE GOSPEL?</td><td class="tdr"><a href="#THE_LAW_OR_THE_GOSPEL">191</a></td></tr>
-</table></div>
-<p class="p6" />
-
-
- <div class="chapter"></div>
-<hr class="chap pg-brk" />
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_1" id="Page_1">[Pg 1]</a></span></p>
-
-<p class="p6 pfs150">THE WISDOM OF FOOLS</p>
-<p class="p6" />
-
-
-<hr class="chap" />
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_2" id="Page_2">[2]</a></span><br />
- <span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_3" id="Page_3">[3]</a></span></p>
-
-<h2><a name="WHERE_IGNORANCE_IS_BLISS" id="WHERE_IGNORANCE_IS_BLISS"></a><a href="#CONTENTS">WHERE IGNORANCE IS BLISS
-’TIS FOLLY TO BE WISE</a></h2>
-
-
-<h3>I</h3>
-
-<div><img class="drop-cap" src="images/i_008.jpg" width="60" alt="" /></div>
-<p class="drop-cap">THE most delightful thing about
-our engagement is that everybody
-is so pleased with it.”
-Amy Townsend said this, smiling down
-at her lover, who, full length on the grass
-beside her, leaned on his elbow, watching
-her soft hair blowing across her forehead,
-and the color of the sun flickering through
-the shadows, hot on her cheek; for she
-had closed her fluffy white parasol and
-taken off her hat here under an oak-tree
-on the grassy bank of the river.</p>
-
-<p>“I should have thought that the fact
-that we were pleased ourselves was a trifle
-more important,” he suggested. But Miss
-Townsend paid no attention to his interruption.</p>
-
-<p>“You know, generally, when people
-get engaged, there are always people who<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_4" id="Page_4">[4]</a></span>
-exclaim: either the man is too good for
-the girl (and you are too good for me,
-Billy!), or the girl is too good for the
-man”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“She is; there is no question about
-that,” the man interrupted.</p>
-
-<p>“Be quiet!” the other commanded.
-“But in our case, everybody approves.
-You see, in the first place, you are a Parson,
-and I’m a Worker. That’s what
-they call me,&mdash;the old ladies,&mdash;‘a
-Worker.’ And of course that’s a most
-appropriate combination to start with.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, the old ladies will discover that
-my wife isn’t going to run their committees
-for them,” the parson said emphatically.
-“Besides, if I’m a Parson, you’re
-a Person! How do the old ladies bear
-it, that I haven’t any ancestors, and used
-to run errands in a tin-shop? <em>I</em>’m a
-Worker, literally enough.”</p>
-
-<p>“You are a goose!” she told him
-calmly. “Don’t keep interrupting me,
-Billy. What do ancestors amount to?
-I admit I’m glad that none of mine were
-hanged (so far as I know), or that they
-didn’t run off with other people’s money&mdash;or<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_5" id="Page_5">[5]</a></span>
-wives. (I’d mind the wives less
-than the money, I must confess. I suppose
-you think that’s very mediæval in
-me?) But what credit is their good behavior
-to me? You are a credit to your
-people, whoever they were; and my own
-belief is that they were Princes!”</p>
-
-<p>She had such a charming way of flinging
-up her head and looking down at him
-sidewise, that he was willing to have had
-any kind of ancestors, only to catch that
-look of joyous pride; and in his own joyousness
-he was impelled to try to take her
-hand in his: but her fingers were laced
-about her knee, and she shook her head.</p>
-
-<p>“Stop! I’m talking seriously; you
-mustn’t be silly. You must listen to the
-other reasons why we are approved of:
-First, you are a Parson, and I’m a Worker.
-Secondly, you are forty-two, and ‘it’s
-high time’&mdash;high time, sir!&mdash;‘for you
-to be married’; and I’m twenty-seven&mdash;and,
-really, you know, ‘my chances are
-lessening’&mdash;(that’s what they say, my
-dear); and I ‘hardly deserve, after all
-these years’”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“And offers?” suggested her lover.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_6" id="Page_6">[6]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“After all these <em>years</em>, Billy,&mdash;not to
-get a crooked stick in the end.”</p>
-
-<p>“I am not crooked, I will admit,” he
-said.</p>
-
-<p>“Thirdly,” she proceeded, “you are
-very good-looking, and all the old Tabbies
-say that a handsome minister ought
-to be married.”</p>
-
-<p>“The old Tabbies might find something
-better to talk about,” he said, his
-face hardening. “Oh, Amy, that’s the
-kind of thing that makes a man cringe!&mdash;I
-mean a minister. Here is this great,
-serious, strenuous matter of living&mdash;the
-consciousness of God; that’s what living
-is in its highest expression. And
-to further that consciousness is the divinest
-human passion. A man tries to
-do it, gives his life to it, and immediately
-he is food for chattering old women!
-They gossip about his affairs, or his
-clothes, or his looks, even!” William
-West sat up, his face stirred with anger
-and pity. “But I suppose I must admit
-that the Parsons bring it on themselves
-to some extent,” he ended, with a sigh;
-“we don’t mingle enough with men; they<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_7" id="Page_7">[7]</a></span>
-distrust us, and think we talk twaddle
-about overcoming temptations we know
-nothing about. So, being shut out from
-masculine living, we do haunt tea-tables,
-and gabble about vestments. I suppose
-there’s no doubt of it. Amy, I believe
-that the old hunting, swearing parsons of
-three generations ago were of more real
-value in the world than the harmless
-creatures that we have now!”</p>
-
-<p>He had a certain stern way of thrusting
-out his lower lip when he was very
-much in earnest, and drawing his strong
-brows together; an impatient fire sprang
-into his beautiful dark eyes. He turned
-and looked at her, claiming her understanding.</p>
-
-<p>“Yes,” she said; “yes, it is so. The
-belittling of the profession of the ministry
-is a dreadful thing&mdash;a shameful
-thing. I once heard a man say that ‘Elderly
-unmarried women always had to
-have something to fuss over and coddle,
-something to lead around by a blue ribbon.
-Sometimes it was a poodle; sometimes
-it was a clergyman.’ And there’s
-truth in it, Billy.”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_8" id="Page_8">[8]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“There is,” he said grimly.</p>
-
-<p>“Well, dear,” she reassured him, smiling,
-“your distinguished rudeness to the
-ladies of your congregation has at least
-protected you from the blue ribbon.”</p>
-
-<p>He began to protest, but the talk slipped
-back into their own affairs, and somehow
-he succeeded in getting her hand,
-and by and by they were silent, just for
-happiness, and because it was sunset, and
-the river was flickering with light, and
-there was a faint stir of leaves overhead.
-They were to be married in a fortnight,
-and they were going to have all their lives
-together to say how good life was, so
-there was no need to talk now.</p>
-
-<p>As the girl had said, it really was a
-very satisfactory match. William West
-was a man whom every one honored, and
-many loved. For fifteen years he had
-been settled in Mercer; first as an assistant
-to old Mr. Brown, and then as rector
-of the church. But he had taken his
-place in the community as a man of
-strong judgment and high character; perhaps
-as a citizen, rather than as a minister.
-Men felt that he was a man before<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_9" id="Page_9">[9]</a></span>
-he was a clergyman; not knowing that
-his calling had given him his highest
-manhood. He was singularly devoid of
-clerical affectation; consequently the influence
-of his own reverence was not vitiated
-by a suspicion of his common sense.
-In fact, his sanity in matters religious,
-joined to his knowledge of human nature,
-made him a man of importance in affairs
-municipal and social. That he had lived
-to be forty-two, and had not married, was
-from no asceticism; he was a very human
-person, and fully intended to have a wife;
-only, she must be just what he wanted.
-And so far, that “not impossible She”
-who was to possess his heart had never
-appeared. When she did, he recognized
-her immediately, and would have proposed
-to her the next day, had not a feeling
-of diffidence as to her sentiments
-deterred him for nearly two weeks. At
-the end of that time, he told her&mdash;ah,
-well, never mind what he told her! She,
-at least, will never forget the passion of
-that claiming.</p>
-
-<p>Amy Townsend had come to spend
-the winter in Mercer, with a cousin. Of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_10" id="Page_10">[10]</a></span>
-course, the first Sunday she went to St.
-James’s, as everybody who was anybody
-did. When she came home, her eyes
-were keen with interest.</p>
-
-<p>“Do tell me about him, Cousin Kate,”
-she said. “I never heard that sort of
-preaching; what does it mean? Is he a
-real person, or is he just clever?” Mrs.
-Paul laughed.</p>
-
-<p>“Wait till you meet him! you’ll see.”</p>
-
-<p>But she also added to herself, “Wait
-till he meets you!” For Mrs. Paul was
-one of those courageous women who rush
-in where angels fear to tread; she was a
-match-maker.</p>
-
-<p>“Is he married?” the girl asked, naturally
-enough; but blushed furiously the
-next instant, which made her angry.</p>
-
-<p>“No; but it is not for lack of opportunity,”
-said Mrs. Paul dryly. “I declare,
-Amy, women are dreadful fools,
-sometimes! I should think a clergyman
-wouldn’t marry, out of sheer disgust for
-their silliness.”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, he’s run after, is he?” Miss
-Townsend said coldly.</p>
-
-<p>“Well, I must admit he’s very attrac<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_11" id="Page_11">[11]</a></span>tive,”
-Mrs. Paul began, remembering her
-scheme, and retreating a little,&mdash;for
-nothing will put a girl against a man
-sooner than to know he is “run after.”</p>
-
-<p>Then she told his story: the boy had
-been a waif. (“His mother was respectable,
-I think,” said Mrs. Paul, “but nobody
-knows anything about the father.”)
-He had had that dreariest sort of childhood
-which knows no other home than
-an institution. Then, somehow, “quite
-like a story-book,” Mrs. Paul said, a
-gentleman took an interest in him, and
-began to help him in one way or another.</p>
-
-<p>“It was that zoölogical man, Professor
-Wilson; you know who I mean?” Mrs.
-Paul explained. “He looked after him.
-At first he put him in a tinshop, if you
-please, as errand-boy,&mdash;fancy! this man
-with the ‘grand manner.’”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, I supposed he was a gentleman,”
-Amy Townsend said.</p>
-
-<p>“Amy, you are a snob,” her cousin
-answered hotly. “He is.”</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Paul was so annoyed that she
-ended the story of Mr. West’s career
-very briefly. “Professor Wilson offered<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_12" id="Page_12">[12]</a></span>
-either to start him in business or put
-him through college; he chose to go to
-college.”</p>
-
-<p>“That was rather fine,” Miss Townsend
-agreed.</p>
-
-<p>“Fine? It just showed what sort of
-a man he was!” cried Mrs. Paul. “He
-worked his way to some extent; that is,
-he was Professor Wilson’s secretary, and
-he did a lot of tutoring. Professor Wilson
-left him a good deal of money, but
-he gave away nearly half of it at once,
-John says. Quite remarkable for a young
-man. Well, that’s all; you see what he
-is to-day&mdash;a gentleman and a scholar:
-John says there is no man in Mercer who
-has the influence that he has.”</p>
-
-<p>Miss Townsend, in spite of her careful
-indifference, was interested. And later,
-when Rev. William West met her, he,
-too, was “interested;” and all fell out
-as the most experienced romancer could
-desire.</p>
-
-<p>Amy had a little money, much charm,
-a certain distinction that answered for
-beauty, and a very true nature; there
-was, perhaps, a certain hard integrity<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_13" id="Page_13">[13]</a></span>
-about her, but her impulses were gracious.
-Also, as the old ladies said, she
-was a “worker.” She found life too interesting
-not to meddle with it.</p>
-
-<p>So it had come to pass that these two,
-who, as Mrs. Paul said, “were made for
-each other,” were going to be married.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>“Just think, in two weeks!” he said,
-as they sat there under the oak, the blossoming
-grass knee-deep about them, and
-the air sweet with clover. “Amy, it does
-not seem as if I had been alive until
-now.”</p>
-
-<p>“I wonder, does it go on getting&mdash;nicer?”
-she asked him, a little shyly;
-“everything seems to be better, and more
-worth while.”</p>
-
-<p>“I understand,” he said.</p>
-
-<p>And they were silent for awhile, because
-understanding is enough, when
-people are in love. Then the girl’s gayety
-began to sparkle out.</p>
-
-<p>“Billy, Cousin Kate says if I’m not
-careful I’ll get to be a managing Parsoness;
-she says I must devote myself to
-you, not to your poor people.”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_14" id="Page_14">[14]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“Mrs. Paul has given a great deal of
-good advice in her day,” the Rev. Billy
-remarked meditatively, “and I really
-think very little harm has come from it.”</p>
-
-<p>“She advised your being called to
-Mercer,” Amy retorted. “Did you know
-that?”</p>
-
-<p>“Know it? My dear child! how often
-have I dined at the Pauls’? Just so often
-have I heard it.”</p>
-
-<p>“Now, Billy, that’s not very nice in
-you.”</p>
-
-<p>“I but stated a fact; and I have a
-high regard for Mrs. Paul. Only, when
-I think how many girls she has tried to
-make marry me!&mdash;but they would none
-of them look at me.”</p>
-
-<p>“And in two weeks the opportunity
-will be gone,” she jeered.</p>
-
-<p>“Poor girls!” the minister commiserated;
-and was reproved for vanity.
-Indeed, just because happiness is so serious
-a thing, they became very frivolous,
-these two, sitting watching the sunset,
-and the river. Amy told him a funny
-story about the parish; he responded by
-another concerning Tom Reilly, a police<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_15" id="Page_15">[15]</a></span>man;
-which reminded Amy to tell him
-that poor Tom had had an accident, and
-hurt his hand.</p>
-
-<p>“But it was very stupid in him,” she
-added, with a little of that resentful goodness
-that one sees sometimes in women.
-“I’m not at all sorry for him, because
-he deserved it. He had been drinking,
-and as he went stumbling out of a car,
-he crushed his hand in the door.”</p>
-
-<p>Her lover was not to be lured into professional
-comments; he only muttered,
-“<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Mauvais quart d’heure</i>”&mdash;which made
-her say indignantly: “Now, Billy, really,
-that is <em>too</em> much!” and insist that they
-should go home immediately. “I cannot
-descend to such levels,” she told him;
-and was very stern and forbidding when,
-looking to the right and left, and seeing
-no man, he begged to be allowed to kiss
-her.</p>
-
-<p>But this was all froth. Beneath, in the
-man’s life, were the great tides of love,
-moving, noiseless and unchangeable, from
-out the depths of his soul. In the girl’s
-life it was all shine and perfume and
-glitter, like flowers blossoming on a rock;<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_16" id="Page_16">[16]</a></span>
-beneath, in her heart, was the solid ground
-of reverence and faith.</p>
-
-
-<h3>II</h3>
-
-<p>The two weeks that were to pass before
-the day that was to be the Day of
-Days were very full.</p>
-
-<p>To get parish work ahead so that
-things would run themselves for the
-month’s absence which had been granted
-the clergyman was no small undertaking.
-William West was very busy, and a little
-preoccupied in his endeavor to put his
-best thought, not upon his own happiness,
-but upon committees, or Sunday-school
-matters, or his assistant’s spiritual
-anxieties concerning his superior’s indifference
-to the color of the lectern bookmarks;
-so it chanced that he saw less
-of Amy than in the earlier part of their
-engagement. He had but little time to
-think of her, and absolutely no time to
-think of himself.</p>
-
-<p>They were to be married on Thursday.
-Late Monday afternoon Mr. West, with
-great timidity, ventured into Mrs. Paul’s<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_17" id="Page_17">[17]</a></span>
-drawing-room, with the bold purpose of
-abstracting his sweetheart for a walk.
-The project was, of course, promptly
-crushed.</p>
-
-<p>“As though Amy had any time for
-that sort of thing!” said Mrs. Paul. “Do
-you see those presents? She has got to
-acknowledge every one of them! Amy,
-your cousin John and I will entertain
-Mr. West. You can write your notes
-here, and let him look at you; that’s
-quite enough for him.”</p>
-
-<p>Amy smiled at him across a barricade
-of silver <span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">bric-à-brac</span>.</p>
-
-<p>“Billy thinks silver picture-frames and
-brushes and things are a dreadful waste
-of money,” she said. “Just think how
-thankful you ought to be, Billy, that I
-am making our manners for you; you
-couldn’t say ‘Thank you,’ with truth.”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, truth,” said John Paul, lounging
-about the room, with his hands in his
-pockets&mdash;“truth, my dear little cousin,
-is governed by the law of benefit; didn’t
-you know that? If it makes the donors
-feel happy, tell them West has longed for
-nothing in the world so much as a silver<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_18" id="Page_18">[18]</a></span>
-glove buttoner. Now, if you told them
-the truth, fancy the shock! Ask the
-Parson.”</p>
-
-<p>“The Parson has no such base and cynical
-theory,” Miss Townsend responded
-promptly; “have you, Billy? You don’t
-think truth is governed by the law of
-benefit?”</p>
-
-<p>“I think truth-telling is,” he assured
-her.</p>
-
-<p>John Paul assumed that look of artless
-and simpering satisfaction which one
-sees on the countenance of the unprotected
-male, who, in the bosom of his
-family, finds himself indorsed by a higher
-power.</p>
-
-<p>“There, Amy, what did I tell you? I
-had an instance of it yesterday. I”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, here is a third asparagus fork,”
-murmured Amy; “what <em>shall</em> I say about
-it?”</p>
-
-<p>“What’s your instance?” said the
-minister.</p>
-
-<p>“Well, we’ve been looking for an assistant
-engineer, and there have been
-the Lord only knows how many applicants.
-One fellow impressed me very<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_19" id="Page_19">[19]</a></span>
-well; he seemed as straight as a string;
-honest face, thoroughly decent-looking
-fellow. He was an Englishman, but his
-references for three years were American.
-So much the better, of course. I
-was going to engage him, when, bless
-my soul, if he didn’t begin to stammer
-out something about having no references
-from ‘Home’ (‘’ome,’ he called it), because
-he ‘’adn’t been over steady,’ but
-he’d signed the pledge, and ‘he wasn’t
-afraid of drink any more.’ I didn’t hire
-him. Now, I call that truth not governed
-by the law of benefit.”</p>
-
-<p>“You don’t discriminate between being
-truthful and telling the truth,” said
-William West. “You hadn’t asked him
-if he had ever drank. I don’t believe you
-lost much, in not engaging him, poor fellow.”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, Billy, I think it was rather fine
-in him,” Amy protested, looking up from
-her notes.</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t see anything fine,” the minister
-said simply. “In the first place,
-there was a lack of reserve, a lack of
-privacy, in rushing into confession, which<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_20" id="Page_20">[20]</a></span>
-betrays the weak nature. There was
-also self-consciousness, in dwelling on his
-sin. And in the third place”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“This sounds like a sermon: firstly&mdash;secondly”&mdash;Amy
-murmured, signing
-her name to her thanks for the third
-asparagus fork.</p>
-
-<p>&mdash;“in the third place, if the man has
-reformed, there was an essential untruth
-in posing as a sinner.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, I don’t quite agree with that,”
-began Mrs. Paul.</p>
-
-<p>“He’s right; he’s right,” John Paul
-declared. “I say, West, suppose we
-went about confessing some of our college
-performances?” The senior warden
-of St. James grinned, but his wife looked
-displeased.</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t believe you ever did anything
-very bad, John; but if you did, I think
-you should have confessed to me.”</p>
-
-<p>“I stole some signs, Kate,” he told
-her; “can you forgive me?”</p>
-
-<p>Amy, listening, smiling, said with that
-charming sidewise glance at her lover:
-“Cousin Kate is quite right. I should
-never forgive a man who didn’t tell me<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_21" id="Page_21">[21]</a></span>
-everything! Billy, come here and confess.
-Have you ever done anything
-wicked?”</p>
-
-<p>“We are all miserable sinners,” John
-Paul murmured. “I say so publicly every
-Sunday”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“But you don’t specify!” the minister
-reminded him, with a laugh.</p>
-
-<p>“Yes; but, Billy,” Amy Townsend insisted,
-“doesn’t it say somewhere that
-‘confession is good for the soul’?”</p>
-
-<p>“Perhaps it is,” he said dryly, “but,
-generally speaking, it’s mighty bad for
-the mind.”</p>
-
-<p>There was an outcry at this from the
-two women.</p>
-
-<p>“Of course,” Mrs. Paul said, “simply
-gossiping about one’s self isn’t confession;
-but don’t you think, Mr. West, in
-the really deep relations of life, between
-friend and friend, or husband and wife,
-there should be no reserves?”</p>
-
-<p>“My dear Mrs. Paul,” he answered, with
-quick gravity, “there must be reserves&mdash;except
-with God. The human soul is
-solitary. But for confession, that is different;
-justice and reparation sometimes<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_22" id="Page_22">[22]</a></span>
-demand it; but, again, justice and courage
-sometimes forbid it. Unless it is
-necessary, it is flabby vanity. That’s
-why I said it was bad for the mind.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well,” said Amy, with some spirit,
-“I don’t believe in taking respect, or&mdash;or
-love, on false pretenses. If I had ever
-done any dreadful thing, I should want
-to confess; good gracious, for the mere
-comfort of it I should have to! It would
-be like walking on a volcano to keep a
-secret.”</p>
-
-<p>William West went over to the table
-where she was writing, and, finding a
-place among the clutter of presents to
-lean his elbow, sat down and looked at
-her with good-humored amusement.</p>
-
-<p>“Where are you going to draw the
-line? How far back are you going in
-confessing your sins? Please don’t tell
-me that you slapped your nurse when
-you were three. It would be a horrible
-shock, and make me very unhappy to discover
-such a crime.”</p>
-
-<p>“I shall go all the way back,” said
-Amy, with decision; “if I had done anything
-wrong, I mean very wrong, I should<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_23" id="Page_23">[23]</a></span>
-tell you,&mdash;if I had only been a year
-old!”</p>
-
-<p>The minister laughed. “A desperate
-villain of one year!” he said; but as he
-spoke a puzzled look came into his eyes.</p>
-
-<p>“I think,” Amy Townsend proceeded,
-“that honor and fairness demand speaking
-out. And as for making some one
-else unhappy,” her voice dropped a little,
-and the color came up into her face,
-“where people love each other, they have
-a right to unhappiness.”</p>
-
-<p>“Listen to Amy clamoring for unhappiness!”
-John Paul commented. “Don’t
-worry, my child; you’ll get your share.
-There’s enough to go round, I’ve noticed.”</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Paul laughed, but a note of reality
-had come into the careless talk that
-gave her a sense of being a third party.</p>
-
-<p>“John, you are flippant,” she said;
-“come, let’s leave these two poor things
-alone; they’re dying to get rid of us.
-And besides, if Amy is going to confess
-her sins since she was one year old, it
-will take time.”</p>
-
-<p>“That I consider a most uncalled for<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_24" id="Page_24">[24]</a></span>
-reference to my twenty-seven years,”
-Amy retorted; “and besides, I’ve two
-more notes to write.”</p>
-
-<p>“And I must go home,” William
-West said, rising in a preoccupied manner.</p>
-
-<p>“Why&mdash;but I thought you were going
-to stay to dinner!” Mrs. Paul protested,
-with dismay.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, you must stay to dinner,” Amy
-urged.</p>
-
-<p>But her lover was resolute. Nor did
-he, as usual, try to lure her out into the
-hall that he might make his adieus. He
-said good-night, stopped a moment to
-discuss with his senior warden something
-about the appropriation for repairs
-at St. James, and then, with a sober
-abstraction deepening in his face, went
-home through the delicate June dusk,
-which was full of the scent of the roses
-that grow behind the garden walls of the
-old-fashioned part of Mercer.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_25" id="Page_25">[25]</a></span></p>
-
-
-<h3>III</h3>
-
-<p>The Rev. William West went into his
-study and shut the door. He was a
-man who was always accessible to his
-people, yet his lips tightened with impatience
-when he found a parishioner
-awaiting him, and saw a pile of notes
-on his writing-table. But it was only
-for an instant; he listened to the anxieties
-of his caller with that concentration
-of sympathy which can put self
-aside; and when the man went away
-it was with the other man’s heartfelt
-grip of the hand, his heartfelt “I thank
-you for coming to me; God bless you,
-my friend, and give you wisdom.”</p>
-
-<p>The letters were not so easy; but
-he went through them faithfully, answering
-them or filing them away: appeals
-for help, or money, or work; two
-invitations; two letters from ladies of
-his congregation about their souls; the
-unmarried and interesting clergyman
-knows this sort of letter too well! He
-was aware of a sense of haste in getting
-through with these things; a sense of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_26" id="Page_26">[26]</a></span>
-haste even in disposing of another caller,
-a boy, who came to say he had doubts
-about the existence of God, and who felt
-immensely important in consequence. “I
-tell you, Mr. West,” this youth declared,
-nodding his head, “of course I don’t
-mean to be hard on the church; of
-course I see the value of such a belief
-in keeping the masses straight, but, for
-thinking men!” To treat this sort of
-thing seriously and patiently is one of
-the trials of a thinking man who happens
-to be a minister. Then the Tenor
-came to give his side of the quarrel with
-the Bass, and the organist to say that
-quartette and chorus were all fools.</p>
-
-<p>One does not prove the existence of
-God, or pacify wounded artistic feelings
-easily; it was nearly midnight before
-the clergyman had his library to himself.</p>
-
-<p>With a sigh of relief he shut the door,
-and walked once or twice about the
-room, as though trying to shake off
-other people’s affairs; then he bit off
-the end of a cigar, struck a match, and
-sat down. He put his hands deep into<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_27" id="Page_27">[27]</a></span>
-his pockets, and stretched his feet
-straight out in front of him.</p>
-
-<p>“It must be five years since I’ve
-thought of it,” he said to himself.</p>
-
-<p>He held his lighted cigar between
-his fingers, his chin sunk on his breast,
-his mouth set in that hard line which
-refuses to extenuate or evade; his eyes
-narrowed with thought. Five years:
-Yes, the memory had so faded and
-lessened that by and by it had ceased,
-and now it was as though, as he walked
-along the level path of daily life, a serpent
-suddenly lifted its evil head from
-the dust, and struck at him, hissing.</p>
-
-<p>“I was eighteen,” he said to himself;
-“no, nineteen. And now I’m forty-two!
-Twenty-nine, thirty-nine&mdash;it’s
-twenty-three years ago.”</p>
-
-<p>There is a hideous consciousness
-which comes to most of us men and women
-at one time or another in our lives,
-of our inability to get away from the
-past. From out of the “roaring loom
-of Time” comes the fabric of our lives;
-white, run, perhaps, with a warp of
-silver in our latter years; set, even, by<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_28" id="Page_28">[28]</a></span>
-the mercy of God, with deep jewels
-of experience; spangled with golden
-threads of opportunity; but back, in
-its beginnings&mdash;what stains, what rents!
-dragged through what foul and primeval
-experiences of youth! Some, by
-environment and temperament, have
-nothing to blush for but follies; the
-joyous baseness of the young animal
-never broke through the conditions of
-their lives, or the dullness of their
-minds. But for most there are black
-spots from which, with wonder and
-disgust, the adult turns away his eyes:
-the cruelty and impurity of childhood;
-the ingratitude and meanness of youth.
-With the man, as with the race, that is
-not first which is spiritual, but that
-which is natural.</p>
-
-<p>Twenty-three years ago: is there any
-connection between a fault committed
-then and the William West of to-day?
-None! What has he in common with
-the boy of nineteen? Nothing!</p>
-
-<p>Suppose he told Amy, would she understand
-that? Why, the very fact
-that he had forgotten it meant that he<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_29" id="Page_29">[29]</a></span>
-did not belong to it, nor it to him. And
-yet he wanted to tell her!</p>
-
-<p>William West got up with an impatient
-gesture. How absurd this sort
-of mental posturing and agonizing was!
-What folly, to think of burdening Amy
-with the miserable facts. Told now,
-twenty-three years afterwards, their relation
-to his present life could not be
-seen in true proportion. It would be an
-amazement and a shame to her to think
-that her lover, her husband, had done
-thus and so. Yet, it would not be her
-husband who was the sinner; it was that
-poor, foolish, wicked boy of so many
-years ago; that boy upon whom he
-looked back with the amazement and
-disgust of an outside observer. What a
-curious untruth, then, in confessing it.
-He gave a sigh of relief as he reached
-this conclusion; it was as if he had
-stumbled for a moment, but had got his
-balance again.</p>
-
-<p>But, in spite of himself, his mind crept
-back to the brink of that black abyss of
-memory: those were dreadful days, those
-days of repentance twenty years ago. The<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_30" id="Page_30">[30]</a></span>
-remembrance of his sin would surge over
-him at the most unexpected moments&mdash;in
-the midst of work or study; when he
-was talking; when he was praying; when,
-perhaps, he was helping some other human
-creature stagger along under a burden
-of remorse. The deeper he went into
-the new life he had begun to lead&mdash;the
-clearer the heavenly vision grew before
-his eyes&mdash;the blacker the sin seemed.
-For years, the memory of it used to come
-over him with a sudden sinking and sickening
-of the soul. He remembered how
-inescapable the torment of his regret had
-been. There would be periods of forgetfulness,
-when he was plunged into work,
-and life, because it was service, seemed
-good and sweet; then, at some word, or
-the look of the sky, or the smell of a flower&mdash;the
-evil spirit of recollection would
-leap upon him and tear him. Yet the
-periods of forgetfulness had lengthened
-and lengthened. The pain and shame
-had faded and faded. The thing that
-gave him this sick feeling, as he sat here
-in his study at midnight, was not the fact
-that he had sinned; it was the memory<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_31" id="Page_31">[31]</a></span>
-of how he had suffered for his sin. The
-sin itself, now, was too remote, too separate
-from himself for any more repentance;
-it had ceased to be real. But the
-suffering!&mdash;he could not bear to think
-of that.</p>
-
-<p>“How mad this is!” he said to himself,
-with a curious terror lest the old
-anguish should come back: the horror a
-man might feel who sees the surgeon’s
-knife under which he has once agonized.</p>
-
-<p>For very fear of memory, William West
-drove his thoughts back to the question
-of his duty to Amy; that was plain reasoning,
-and had nothing to do with this
-nightmare.</p>
-
-<p>He lighted another match, but held it
-absently, until it scorched his fingers,
-then flung it down with an angry exclamation.
-It seemed as though the pain
-burned through all this fog of the past,
-and showed him the facts which he must
-judge, and the folly of his uncertainty.
-For, after all, what was this matter he
-was trying to decide? Was it not merely
-the question of what was best for Amy,
-not what was most comfortable for him<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_32" id="Page_32">[32]</a></span>self?
-It was that abstraction called
-Honor, as applied to Amy’s happiness.</p>
-
-<p>What was for her happiness, or, as he
-had put it first, what was his duty to her?
-To let her know his past, or to keep a
-secret from her, and allow her to suppose
-that she knew his life as she did her
-own?</p>
-
-<p>Admit that it was his impulse to tell
-her; what did that impulse really mean?
-Primarily, that it would be a great relief
-to him; the idea of having any reserves
-was most repugnant to him. For the
-moment the instinct was again strong to
-tell her. But, frowning, he went on with
-his argument: A relief to him; but what
-to her? A pain and a shame; a memory
-that might outlast another twenty-three
-years, perhaps. But she might want to
-know it? Well, that was no reason. If
-she wanted poison, should he give it to
-her? And this was poison. Did he not
-know that? Good God!</p>
-
-<p>But she had a right to know it? Here
-he was perfectly clear; certainly not. It
-in no wise bore upon his relation to her.
-Furthermore, the question of prudence<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_33" id="Page_33">[33]</a></span>
-was not involved; there was no chance
-that some day, somehow, it might come
-to her ears. She could never hear it,
-except from him. If this were not the
-case, of course he would tell her.</p>
-
-<p>But was he deceiving her? Was he,
-as she put it, “taking her love on false
-pretenses”? William West got up and
-walked the length of his library; then he
-stopped by the open window, and looked
-out on the silent street; a policeman on
-his beat glanced up and saw him, and
-touched his helmet with two fingers.</p>
-
-<p>“Good-evening, sir; don’t know but
-what I’d better say good-morning!”</p>
-
-<p>“What! Is it as late as all that,
-Reilly?” the minister said; and added a
-friendly inquiry about the man’s hand,
-which seemed to be hurt. Amy’s stern
-sense of the retributive justice of the accident
-came into his mind, and he smiled
-involuntarily. The policeman looked
-sheepish, as the clergyman meant he
-should, and turned the conversation by
-remarking that he would “be lookin’
-after the rectory special when Mr. West
-was away on his weddin’ tower.”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_34" id="Page_34">[34]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“Thank you, Reilly!” the other answered
-heartily.</p>
-
-<p>The policeman’s steps went echoing
-off into the night; a street lamp flickered,
-and a puff of soft wind wandered into
-the window.</p>
-
-<p><em>Deceiving her: taking her love under
-false pretenses.</em></p>
-
-<p>Was he anything but the man Amy
-supposed him to be? Very humbly, very
-truly, he said to himself that, by the
-grace of God, he was an honest, pure,
-God-fearing man. That sin of twenty-three
-years ago was not his sin. He,
-William West, forty-two years old, whose
-honorable record in the community was
-spread through all these years of service,
-was not that base, mean, wicked boy.
-The sin was not his. It was a sin of
-youth; a sin almost of childhood. It
-meant nothing to him now.</p>
-
-<p>“It is nothing now,” he insisted, passionately.
-Accustomed to weigh other
-people’s actions and motives, he knew
-that he was discriminating with almost
-judicial impartiality when he thus looked
-himself in the face. “<em>A repentant man<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_35" id="Page_35">[35]</a></span>
-has no more to do with his sin, for which
-he has repented and made reparation,
-than a well man has to do with the disease
-of which he has been cured.</em>” He
-remembered that he had used this illustration
-once to some one else; he must
-apply it now to himself. No; he was not
-deceiving Amy. He was only sparing
-her&mdash;sparing her, to be sure, from a
-pain she might wish to bear, but that had
-nothing to do with the question. If she
-knew, she would suffer; not from a fact,
-but from an illusion; for he would be
-confessing a sin which was not his sin.
-Honor? The word seemed artificial as
-he thus put the situation before him.</p>
-
-<p>No; it would be cowardly to tell her,
-and it would be untrue. There was
-nothing for him to do but face the fact
-that, to spare her, he must bear, for the
-rest of his life, the wretched burden of
-realizing that he had a secret from her.</p>
-
-<p>Sanely, truly, this good man believed
-that his impulse to tell the woman he
-loved was selfish and cowardly; it was
-an impulse to make her share a burden
-which he deserved to bear alone. Fur<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_36" id="Page_36">[36]</a></span>thermore,
-it was the effect, not of reason,
-not of religion, not of love; it was the
-effect, first, of the selfish desire to seek
-relief by sharing a cruel knowledge; secondly,
-of a traditional sentimentality, the
-weak and driveling outcome of that sense
-of justice which is expressed in the willingness
-to bear consequences.</p>
-
-<p>Well, the boy who had sinned had
-borne the consequences; he had suffered.</p>
-
-<p>For the man to suffer now, twenty-three
-years after, was unreasonable, but
-inevitable.</p>
-
-<p>For a woman, who had no part or lot
-in that young past, to suffer now, twenty-three
-years afterwards, was foolish and
-useless.</p>
-
-<p>If the man permitted it, he was a coward
-and a fool.</p>
-
-<p>This, at least, was what William West
-told himself.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_37" id="Page_37">[37]</a></span></p>
-
-
-<h3>IV</h3>
-
-<p>The conclusion to which the Rev. Mr.
-West came was that, if his love for Amy
-was deep enough and unselfish enough,
-he would hold his tongue. He believed
-that confession, apart from reparation,
-was the refuge of the weak mind.</p>
-
-<p>Having thus decided to bear alone the
-burden of his secret, he went, early in
-the morning, and told the woman he
-loved.</p>
-
-<p>Of course, there is no explanation of
-this vacillation and indifference to his
-own judgment, except the mere statement
-that he was in love.</p>
-
-<p>“Amy is trying on her dress,” Mrs.
-Paul said, when he was ushered into the
-library, “so, if you want to see her, you
-can go home at once. But perhaps you
-may condescend to talk to me a little
-while?”</p>
-
-<p>“I must see Amy, please,” he said.
-He had a way of putting people aside so
-gently and peremptorily that Mrs. Paul,
-who was not a yielding person, never
-dreamed of protesting.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_38" id="Page_38">[38]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“I’ll tell her. But she really can’t
-come down for ten minutes. Do you
-mind waiting?”</p>
-
-<p>“Very much,” he said smiling. “Tell
-her to come down just as she is, and let
-me see her frock.”</p>
-
-<p>“Indeed, she shan’t do anything of
-the sort,” said Mrs. Paul, with indignation;
-but relented to the extent of letting
-him have the library to himself, and
-going upstairs to send the girl to him.</p>
-
-<p>Amy came floating in with a snowy
-gleam and rustle, and stood before him,
-bidding him not to dare to touch her;
-though, indeed, being a mere man, he
-was far too uncomfortably awed to think
-of taking this glorious white creature into
-his poor human arms.</p>
-
-<p>“You are magnificent, but you are not
-Amy,” he said; “do get on some common
-clothes. I’m afraid of you.”</p>
-
-<p>“That is as it should be, sir!” she told
-him. “I shall dress like this every day if
-it keeps you obedient. If I had had on
-my wedding-dress last night, you would
-not have dared not to stay to dinner
-when I&mdash;wanted you.”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_39" id="Page_39">[39]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>Her look, through the mist of tulle,
-of soft reproach and challenge, was too
-much for fear, and he boldly kissed her;
-which made her protest, and fly from
-further risk of crushing the bravery of
-her wedding-day. When she came back
-again, in a blue cotton gown, trig and
-pretty, with a bunch of pansies in her
-belt, there was, fortunately, nothing to
-be hurt by being crushed.</p>
-
-<p>There was a moment of tender and passionate
-silence. His errand faded from
-William West’s mind; the reality of life
-was here! his past was no more to him
-than the eggshell is to the eagle. So
-when, later, leaning forward in his chair,
-holding her hand in his, looking into her
-pure eyes, he began to speak, it was almost
-casually. Before the great fact of
-human love, the question of telling her
-or not telling her of that old dead and
-buried sin was suddenly unimportant,&mdash;they
-loved each other!</p>
-
-<p>“Dear,” he said, “I’ve come to tell
-you something. What you said last night
-about having no reserves put it into my
-head. I had forgotten it.”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_40" id="Page_40">[40]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>It was characteristic of the man that
-there was no preamble; his words were
-simple, and he was perfectly matter-of-fact
-and unanxious; so much so that Amy
-laughed.</p>
-
-<p>“Were you a year-old criminal? Well,
-tell me at once! I may reconsider, you
-know.”</p>
-
-<p>There was something in the assurance
-of her gayety that jarred a little, and he
-said seriously:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“It is a wrongdoing of my youth,
-Amy. I’m not sure that it is not selfish
-to tell you about it; but I can’t bear the
-feeling of holding anything back from
-you.”</p>
-
-<p>An answering gravity came into the
-girl’s face, but she smiled.</p>
-
-<p>“Tell me anything; I am not afraid
-to hear!”</p>
-
-<p>Her innocent pride gave him a moment
-of sharp discomfort. Curiously
-enough, what he had to tell her had
-not connected itself, in his mind, with
-personal embarrassment; it had been
-too remote from himself. He found<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_41" id="Page_41">[41]</a></span>
-himself hesitating for a word, and
-grasping after that indifference to all
-but Love which he had felt but a moment
-before.</p>
-
-<p>“Perhaps I am a fool to tell you,” he
-began; “it may make you unhappy,
-and”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>A startled look came into Amy’s
-eyes; then the color flooded up into
-her face. She lifted her head with a
-beautiful, imperious gesture, and stopped
-him with a word.</p>
-
-<p>“I&mdash;understand. Don’t tell me. I&mdash;understand.”
-She bit her lip as she
-spoke, and her eyelids quivered as
-though the tears had risen suddenly.</p>
-
-<p>“You understand?” he repeated, in
-a puzzled voice; “do you mean you
-don’t want me to tell you?”</p>
-
-<p>“William,” she said, in a low voice,
-“I do not think a woman has any business
-with a good man’s life in the past;
-if&mdash;he was not good. I am not a young
-girl. I am old enough to know that a
-man’s life and a girl’s life are&mdash;different;
-but don’t tell me. I&mdash;love you. Don’t<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_42" id="Page_42">[42]</a></span>
-tell me.” She trembled as she spoke,
-and then her eyes sought his, filled with
-love and grief.</p>
-
-<p>A wave of tenderness made his whole
-face melt and quiver. He murmured
-something of his undesert of such love
-as this:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“You are not like other women,” he
-told her, as every lover has told his mistress
-since the sun first shone on lovers.
-“That sin, the mean woman does not
-forgive. And yet it is so much more
-pardonable than some other sins! More
-pardonable, dear, than what I want to tell
-you.”</p>
-
-<p>She drew a quick breath and smiled.
-“Ah,” she said, “I’m glad it is not
-that!” Her relief was so apparent that
-he realized how austerely sweet her face
-had been as she forgave him.</p>
-
-<p>“Go on and tell me,” she said; “I am
-not afraid to hear anything now.”</p>
-
-<p>“That would have been the hardest
-thing to forgive?” he asked her. She
-flashed a look of pride at him.</p>
-
-<p>“The things I could not forgive, you
-could not do!”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_43" id="Page_43">[43]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>This made him glow. After all, who
-would not confess anything, to be met
-by such confident love as this?</p>
-
-<p>“This happened long ago, Amy;
-when I was nineteen. I forged a check
-for five hundred dollars.”</p>
-
-<p>“Forged!” Her lips fell apart; she
-sat staring at him.</p>
-
-<p>He was holding her hand, lifting it
-to his lips sometimes, and looking at it
-as it lay in his. He went on, quietly:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“It was when I was at college; I
-needed money; and&mdash;poor, desperate,
-wicked, silly young man&mdash;I forged Professor
-Wilson’s name. I don’t know
-what I supposed would become of me
-when it was found out. And I don’t
-know what would have become of me,
-but Henry Wilson died before the month
-was out, and so, by some strange chance,
-it never was discovered. If it had been&mdash;well,
-you and I would not have been
-here to-day. Human justice would have
-interposed before Divine mercy”&mdash;He
-looked up with a solemn elation which
-seemed to put self out of his mind. “I
-might have gone lower and lower! Who<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_44" id="Page_44">[44]</a></span>
-can say? It was an easy thing to do,
-for I was his secretary, and he trusted
-me. That, of course, was the most horrible
-part of what I did, the part that
-now seems to me incomprehensible&mdash;the
-broken trust! Well, of course, I
-made reparation, as I called it, out of the
-money he left me. I gave away many
-times the amount I stole; but it was
-only because I was scared at the risk I
-had run, and the thought of it harassed
-me. It was a sort of expedient morality,
-you know; a sort of bargain with my
-conscience for peace of mind. Then,
-about a year afterwards, I met X&mdash;&mdash;.
-I heard him preach, and life changed.
-How extraordinary it seems to look back
-upon it now! Then I repented. Before,
-I had only reformed. That was when I
-entered the divinity school. But just
-think, Amy, just think of the difference!
-How life might have gone&mdash;yet here I
-am to-day, your lover, your husband.
-Oh, the mercy of God!”</p>
-
-<p>He was deeply moved. He got up
-and walked the length of the room.
-Amy sat silently looking down at her<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_45" id="Page_45">[45]</a></span>
-hands in her lap. When he came back,
-his eyes were full of peace.</p>
-
-<p>“That is all, dearest; now we will
-forget it. You know my life as you do
-your own.”</p>
-
-<p>“Forget it?” she repeated, with a
-sudden, sobbing laugh, that tore at the
-man’s heart.</p>
-
-<p>“Amy! dearest! have I shocked you
-so? Remember, it was twenty-three
-years ago; I was only a boy. Let me
-tell you how it was: I was madly in love
-with a woman; at least, it was not love,
-but I thought it was; she fascinated me,
-and”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, go on&mdash;go on!” she interrupted,
-hoarsely; “as if I cared about
-that!”</p>
-
-<p>He tried to take her hand, but she
-made a pretense of arranging the flowers
-in her belt; her head was turned a little
-from him. He leaned forward, with a
-grave authority to command her attention,
-took the pansies from her, and held
-them in his hand.</p>
-
-<p>“I was possessed to marry her. Of
-course, she would not look at me&mdash;a<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_46" id="Page_46">[46]</a></span>
-penniless, charity student. But I
-strained every nerve to win her. It was
-the old story. She took my flowers, or
-theatre tickets, or anything I could give
-her. Curious, the mercenariness of the
-woman did not revolt me! But I was
-mad about her. I thought, at last, that
-if I had money I could give her some
-jewels she wanted, and perhaps she
-would accept me. That was how it
-came about. She took the diamonds,
-and eloped with a married man two days
-afterwards.”</p>
-
-<p>As he told the story, the grossness of
-it all came over him,&mdash;the offense to the
-exquisite delicacy of the girl beside him.</p>
-
-<p>“But I ought not to have told you
-this,” he stammered.</p>
-
-<p>“What?” she said dully. “About
-the woman? Oh, as if that mattered!”
-She turned from him sharply, putting the
-back of her hand against her lips as
-though to hide their quiver.</p>
-
-<p>Then she burst out: “Oh, why did
-you tell me? Why? why? Oh, I wish
-you had not told me!” She shook from
-head to foot. “But it will make no dif<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_47" id="Page_47">[47]</a></span>ference!
-I will not let it make any difference.
-I am going to marry you. Only&mdash;<em>I
-never knew you</em>!”</p>
-
-<p>Those most terrible words, those words
-with which Love destroys itself, came
-like a blow between the eyes. He grew
-very pale. “‘Not make any difference’?”
-he repeated, blankly, “why,
-what difference could it make?”</p>
-
-<p>She stopped crying, suddenly, and
-stood, panting, steadying herself by her
-hands upon his breast, and staring at
-him. There was something almost terrifying
-in this sudden pause and in her
-burning look.</p>
-
-<p>“It’s the one thing,” she said, “don’t
-you see? that lasts. It isn’t like&mdash;other
-things.”</p>
-
-<p>“But it was not I,” he said, mechanically.
-“Not I, the man you&mdash;you
-thought you knew. It was a boy, twenty-three
-years ago. Amy, Amy! Twenty-three
-years ago!”</p>
-
-<p>She did not listen; she kept repeating
-to herself: “It shall make no difference.
-I will not let it make any difference.”
-Alas, it was not for her to say! The<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_48" id="Page_48">[48]</a></span>
-difference was made; the jewel crushed
-under foot is no more a jewel; the rose
-thrown into the fire is no more a rose.
-The stained human soul is no more the
-innocent human soul.</p>
-
-<p>“But you must listen to me, Amy,”
-he said. “No, I will not speak until you
-are calm. Sit down. Look at me. Now,
-listen to what I have to say.” He spoke
-slowly and gently, as one does to a terrified,
-unreasonable child.</p>
-
-<p>“Dear, I had forgotten it. So little is
-it a part of my life that I had forgotten
-it. When I remembered it last night, it
-was with a sense of astonishment, a sense
-of pity for the mad boy who did it. I
-had no personal shame,&mdash;it seemed to
-belong to some one else, whom I watched
-with sorrow and indignation. I do not
-believe that to-day, more than twenty
-years afterwards, I have any business to
-think of it.”</p>
-
-<p>“Then why did you tell me?” she said
-wearily. “Oh, don’t talk about it any
-more. I am going to forget it. Good-by.
-I am going upstairs. I have a headache.
-Good-by.”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_49" id="Page_49">[49]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>She let her hand slip listlessly out of
-his, and left him standing, blankly, his
-lips parted for another protest, and the
-flowers from her belt between his fingers.</p>
-
-
-<h3>V</h3>
-
-<p>As he went out past the drawing-room
-door, Mrs. Paul called to him:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Do come here a moment, Mr. West.
-Isn’t Amy pretty in her wedding-dress?
-You really must tell me what to do about
-something. There is a family”&mdash;and
-she entered upon a puzzling question of
-relief work, her forehead gathering into
-a frown, yet with her kind eyes denying
-the severe common-sense of her statement,
-that if a man will not work neither
-shall he eat.</p>
-
-<p>“But you see we can’t let the children
-go hungry,” she ended.</p>
-
-<p>The consideration of other people’s
-weaknesses and wickedness gave William
-West time to get his breath; he threw
-himself into the question with keen and
-intelligent sympathy. He pointed out
-this; he suggested that; he cleared the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_50" id="Page_50">[50]</a></span>
-puzzle out of Mrs. Paul’s face, and all
-the time he was half deafened by a clamoring
-suspicion: “Have I been a fool?
-She will never forget it! It will always
-be between us. I’ve been a cowardly
-fool.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, that’s all settled,” said Mrs.
-Paul, with an air of relief; “now tell me,
-what day shall I have Amy’s things sent
-to the rectory? And shall I take the
-silver from the bank the day before you
-arrive? Is it safe to leave it at your
-house? I hate the responsibility of other
-people’s silver!”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, certainly, yes,” he answered,
-suddenly absent; and, with a curt good-by,
-left her.</p>
-
-<p>Somehow or other, he hardly knew
-how, he got through the day. There
-was a service in the afternoon, and there
-were other people’s affairs and sorrows
-to remember; fortunately, there always
-is duty for us poor human creatures as a
-refuge from our thoughts! Duties to be
-done saved William West from desperately
-going back to Amy to explain. For
-he was guilty of the impulse of “expla<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_51" id="Page_51">[51]</a></span>nation,”
-the babble with which the weak
-mind is forever annotating its remarks or
-its opinions.</p>
-
-<p>Well, the day passed. In spite of a
-craving to see Amy that was almost agonizing,
-he held on to his common-sense,
-and left her to herself. In the evening,
-his lawyer came in, bringing some papers
-in regard to certain property which it was
-the minister’s intention to make over to
-his wife, and the looking these over, and
-the business talk, was a relief to him.
-He began to feel that he had taken
-Amy’s perturbation much too seriously;
-it would be all right; she would see
-things clearly when the first dismay had
-passed. He thought, tenderly, that he
-must not let her feel any regret for having
-for a moment shown him her pain at
-what he had told her. Her pain was
-only part of her exquisite goodness, that
-goodness which held her, remote and
-lovely, like some pure and luminous star,
-so far above the sordid meannesses and
-wickednesses of common life that she
-could not understand them; perhaps
-even she could not pity them. Only<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_52" id="Page_52">[52]</a></span>
-the sinlessness which was in all points
-tempted like as we are can at once understand
-and pity; his thought, chastened
-and passionate, fled back to his
-Master for comfort,&mdash;yet there was no
-reproach of Amy in his mind.</p>
-
-<p>It must have been after ten, as he and
-Mr. Woodhouse sat before the broad
-writing-table, with the litter of papers
-and memoranda before them, that John
-Paul suddenly burst into the room.</p>
-
-<p>The senior warden’s strong, kind face
-was flushed; he was plainly profoundly
-disturbed and upset.</p>
-
-<p>“West”&mdash;he said explosively, and
-stopped, seeing that they were not alone.
-“My dear fellow,” he began again, stammering
-with agitation, “can I see you a
-moment? A matter of business, Woodhouse,
-if you don’t mind. Can we go
-into another room, West?”</p>
-
-<p>But the lawyer protested that he was
-just about to go home. “I have married
-a wife; you’ll see how it is yourself, Billy,
-pretty soon! Lois allows me twenty
-minutes leeway of the hour I name to
-get home, and if I’m not back then, she<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_53" id="Page_53">[53]</a></span>
-threatens to send a policeman after me.
-Good-night. Good-night, John.” And
-he went whistling off into the night.</p>
-
-<p>The minister had not spoken.</p>
-
-<p>“Look here,” John Paul said, as the
-front door banged, “what under the sun
-is this business? Good Lord, West,
-Amy’s sent you a letter&mdash;Kate told me
-to break it to you, but I&mdash;confound it,
-man&mdash;go and read it. The girl’s crazy.
-Go and read it. What are we going to
-do?”</p>
-
-<p>Without a word William West took
-the letter and read it, standing facing
-Mr. Paul. (“It looked,” John Paul told
-his wife afterwards, “as though he died,
-then and there.”)</p>
-
-<div class="blockquot">
-
-<p>“<em>You were right to tell me&mdash;only
-please&mdash;please don’t make me marry
-you. I cannot. I could never forget.
-If it were anything else&mdash;anything else&mdash;it
-would be different; but theft&mdash;oh,
-how cruel I am to say that! but I cannot
-marry you. There’s no use talking about
-forgiveness. I don’t want you to forgive
-me. I want you to hate me; then you<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_54" id="Page_54">[54]</a></span>
-will suffer less. Hate me. I’m not worth
-anything else. I’m going home to-morrow.
-It can be said I am ill, and the
-wedding is put off. I am ill, it won’t be
-a lie. Please don’t ask to see me. I cannot
-see you. Forgive me.</em></p>
-
-<p class="right"><em>A.</em>”</p>
-</div>
-
-<p>William West sat down, folding the
-letter between his fingers.</p>
-
-<p>“There’s nothing to be said.” He
-spoke very quietly. Then he opened the
-letter again, and looked down at it.</p>
-
-<p>“West, for God’s sake,” John Paul
-entreated him; “listen, man! don’t take
-it like that. The girl is out of her mind.
-Here, pull yourself together! It’s a
-passing whim; you will bring her to her
-senses as soon as you see her.”</p>
-
-<p>“She will not see me,” he said. As
-he spoke his eye caught the headlines of
-the deed of gift, and he read them absently:&mdash;</p>
-
-<div class="blockquot">
-
-<p>“<span class="antiqua">This Indenture</span> <em>made this &mdash;&mdash; day of
-&mdash;&mdash;, Anno Domini 18&mdash;, Witnesseth: that
-William West, the grantor, for divers good
-and valuable considerations to him moving,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_55" id="Page_55">[55]</a></span>
-has, and by these presents does give, grant, and
-convey</em>”&mdash;</p></div>
-
-<p>The fold in the deed hid the rest.</p>
-
-<p>“She’s got to see you!” John Paul
-said angrily. “What’s the matter with
-her? Is she out of her senses? All I
-know is what Kate told me. She asked
-me to bring you the letter. She said
-Amy had broken her engagement. You
-could have knocked me over with a
-straw. She wouldn’t give any reasons.
-But I’m touched by this business. If
-a woman in my household suddenly forgets
-honor and common decency, I’m
-touched by it! Unless you’ve given her
-cause?”</p>
-
-<p>He walked up and down, breathing
-hard, his hands thrust into his pockets,
-jingling his latchkeys for the mere relief
-of doing something. William West put
-the little note into his pocket.</p>
-
-<p>“I’ve given her cause,” he said.</p>
-
-<p>His senior warden stopped in front of
-him, and looked at him critically. “You’re
-lying to me. I know you! It’s a girl’s
-whim, and I’m touched by it, I tell you.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_56" id="Page_56">[56]</a></span>
-She’s a member of my family. I shall
-see her (she wouldn’t see me before I
-started here), and straighten this business
-out. Kate is nearly dead with it.
-My wife looked like a ghost when she
-came and told me&mdash;and the wedding day
-after to-morrow! No; I’m going to
-straighten this thing out. What I want
-you to do is to tell me, man to man, what
-started it?”</p>
-
-<p>“Amy is perfectly justified,” William
-West said dully. “I told her this morning
-that I had committed a forgery.”</p>
-
-<p>“A&mdash;?” John Paul sat down, his
-mouth open, his plump hands on his
-knees, his eyes starting from his head.</p>
-
-<p>“You are out of your mind!”</p>
-
-<p>William West laughed shortly.</p>
-
-<p>“I think, perhaps, I was when I told
-her. Yes; I was a fool. It was twenty-three
-years ago; I had just about forgotten
-it. When I remembered, I told her.
-It was too much for her. She is right
-to stop now. If she can throw me over,
-thank Heaven she has done so!”</p>
-
-<p>The bitterness of it burst out in that
-last sentence. Then, quietly, he told<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_57" id="Page_57">[57]</a></span>
-Amy’s cousin the story of that long-buried
-youth. When it was done, John
-Paul said huskily:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“West, I don’t know what to think
-of your telling her; but I know what
-to think of you. And I know what to
-think of Amy.”</p>
-
-<p>William West said nothing; he took
-the little note out of his pocket and
-turned it over and over.</p>
-
-<p>(“He seemed to go to pieces before
-my eyes,” John Paul told his wife. “I
-tell you, Kate, I saw him lose his moral
-grip! Poor West&mdash;poor fellow!”)</p>
-
-<p>Mr. Paul sat helplessly looking at his
-clergyman, until he had a sense of indecency
-in watching the suffering of
-this silent human creature. Then he
-said vaguely:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“I suppose you want me to clear out?
-But just tell me; what do you want me
-to do?”</p>
-
-<p>“Nothing.”</p>
-
-<p>“But don’t you mean to make any
-effort to bring her to her senses?” burst
-out the other.</p>
-
-<p>“There’s nothing to be done,” the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_58" id="Page_58">[58]</a></span>
-lover said. “It’s over&mdash;don’t you
-see?”</p>
-
-<p>“It’s not over,” insisted Amy’s cousin;
-“I shall see her; this thing can’t go
-on. I’ll send for you; you are well
-rid of her; it will be all right, I”&mdash;Storming
-and protesting and contradicting
-himself, he went out of the rectory,
-scarcely noticing that his host saw him
-to the door, and let him out, in absolute
-silence.</p>
-
-<p>Then William West went back and
-locked himself into his library.</p>
-
-
-<h3>VI</h3>
-
-<p>The senior warden of St. James was
-wrong when he said that his minister lost
-his moral grip. There was, no doubt, a
-time of upheaval and shock, a staggering
-under a calamity which seemed to have
-no moral excuse, to be only a senseless
-shattering of a human life.</p>
-
-<p>But he got his balance again. He
-made no effort to see Amy. This was
-partly to spare her, and partly from a
-sense of the futility of argument; the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_59" id="Page_59">[59]</a></span>
-thing was done; if she married him ten
-times over, it would not be the same.
-As she said, she had never known him;
-and perhaps he had never known her.
-But, for that matter, who of us knows
-the other? The question is, is it worth
-while to try to attain, or to bestow, such
-knowledge? Gossip, of course, had run
-riot when it was known that he had been
-jilted; but gossip, after it reaches a
-certain point of insult and falsehood,
-becomes a source of amusement to its
-victims. West, with his delicate sense
-of humor, found other people’s opinions
-of his sufferings not without interest. It
-being nobody’s business but his own,
-only three people besides Miss Townsend
-and himself knew the facts&mdash;the
-Pauls and his own lawyer; so no light
-was thrown upon the subject to Mercer,
-which seethed and bubbled, and made itself
-wildly ludicrous. The minister went
-away after that first fury of parish excitement
-was over, and came back in
-four months, quite brown, with a good
-appetite, and several very interesting
-pieces of tapestry which he had picked<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_60" id="Page_60">[60]</a></span>
-up on the other side. He dined a little
-less frequently at the Pauls’, and was
-never once reminded that Mrs. Paul had
-been instrumental in bringing him to
-Mercer.</p>
-
-<p>He became, perhaps, a little more of a
-man’s man; a little more impatient with
-his feminine correspondents; a little less
-polite to the old ladies, who thought him
-less good-looking “since his disappointment.”
-But he took a deep and passionate
-hold upon affairs; the conditions of
-labor, the hideous problems of vice; the
-reformation of the sordid politics of the
-small city in which he lived,&mdash;these
-things filled his life. Were they enough?
-Who knows! We make husks into bread
-when the soul starves.</p>
-
-<p>As for Amy, that is another story.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>It was nearly two years after this that
-John Paul walked home one night with
-Mr. Woodhouse, who was a fellow vestryman
-of St. James. They had been sitting
-smoking by William West’s fireside,
-talking over a strike which was on in one
-of the mills, where it seemed as though<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_61" id="Page_61">[61]</a></span>
-the rights lay with the strikers; a fact
-which these gentlemen believed to be
-unusual. It was nearly midnight when
-they left the rectory and went along the
-empty, echoing street together.</p>
-
-<p>“It strikes me,” said Mr. Paul, “that
-you hadn’t much to say for yourself to-night,
-Woodhouse. You’re the canniest
-fellow about giving an opinion! Didn’t
-you want to commit yourself?”</p>
-
-<p>“I haven’t any opinion yet,” said the
-other man slowly; “and, somehow, I got
-to thinking&mdash;I say, John, after all, what
-do you make of West’s telling Miss
-Townsend that matter?”</p>
-
-<p>“I think she didn’t know which side
-her bread was buttered,” John Paul said
-gruffly.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, that’s another question,” the
-lawyer said. “I think almost any woman
-is too good for almost any man. I wonder
-they don’t all think better of it at the
-last moment, and throw us over!”</p>
-
-<p>“How long have you been married,
-Gifford?” the older man inquired cynically.
-“I’ll tell you what Kate says:
-Kate says if Amy could throw him over,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_62" id="Page_62">[62]</a></span>
-she ought to have had the chance to. So
-she thinks West ought to have told
-her.”</p>
-
-<p>“That’s like saying, if there is a
-chance of breaking your neck by taking
-some preposterous leap, take it,” the
-lawyer commented. “But as I look back
-at it now, and see how it has aged Billy,
-and&mdash;well, hardened him a little, I think&mdash;it
-seems such an unnecessary calamity;
-such a blunder! And yet”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Kate has views about heredity, and
-all that sort of thing,” Mr. Paul explained.
-“She says a woman has a right to say
-her children shan’t have a&mdash;shady character
-for a father. That was too much
-for me; I don’t generally contradict my
-Boss; it isn’t peaceful. But that was
-too much for me! Billy West shady!
-I gave my wife a piece of my mind. I
-tell you, Woodhouse, women are hard.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, but there’s something in that,”
-the lawyer protested. “A woman has
-not only a right, but a duty, to think
-of her children, and a possible moral
-taint”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_63" id="Page_63">[63]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“Moral grandmother!” John Paul broke
-in; “West is one man in a hundred. I
-think he’s well rid of Amy: I told him
-so at the time. Why, look here; a man
-who has not repented of his sin has no
-inclination to confess it. And, having
-repented and made reparation, confession
-becomes a mere matter of expediency.
-Why, good heavens, Gifford! is there to
-be no escape from sin? What’s all this
-talk about forgiveness mean, if we’ve got
-to rake up the past and agonize over it
-as long as we live? Isn’t there any
-statute of limitation in things spiritual?
-I don’t believe any large mind dwells on
-its sins, any more than on its virtues!
-And yet,” he ended, suddenly cooling,
-“I swear it is a difficult question, the
-telling or not telling the girl you are going
-to marry.”</p>
-
-<p>“If you bring it down to expediency,
-it’s simple enough,” Gifford Woodhouse
-said; “it was obviously inexpedient.
-Even if she had married him, and simply
-remembered, would either of them have
-been any better off? Would any end<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_64" id="Page_64">[64]</a></span>
-have been subserved by putting such
-painful knowledge on her conscience as
-well as his own? It was not as though
-there was a lady ‘with nine small children
-and one at the breast’ somewhere
-round the corner in the Past, who might
-turn up some day. That sort of sin
-affects the relation of the man and woman,
-and it may be simple prudence to
-confess. Though I think there is a question,
-even there. But in this case expediency,
-you might even call it unselfishness,
-would make him hold his tongue.
-The only thing is, perhaps there is something
-higher than expediency?”</p>
-
-<p>They had reached Mr. Paul’s door; he
-pitched his cigar into the street and pulled
-out his keys, shaking them on the end of
-their chain.</p>
-
-<p>“You mean, abstractly, is it right or
-wrong, under circumstances like these,
-where no third person is to be cleared or
-benefited, to tell? Does honor demand
-confession?”</p>
-
-<p>“Yes,” said the vestryman; “was it a
-duty to speak, or a duty to be silent?”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_65" id="Page_65">[65]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>There was a moment’s silence.</p>
-
-<p>“Was West a fool or a saint?” insisted
-the younger man.</p>
-
-<p>“I’ll be hanged if I know,” said the
-senior warden.</p>
-
-
- <div class="chapter"></div>
-<hr class="chap" />
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_66" id="Page_66">[66]</a></span></p>
-
-<h2><a name="THE_HOUSE_OF_RIMMON" id="THE_HOUSE_OF_RIMMON"></a><a href="#CONTENTS">THE HOUSE OF RIMMON</a></h2>
-
-
-<h3>I</h3>
-
-<div><img class="drop-cap" src="images/i_071.jpg" width="60" alt="" /></div>
-<p class="drop-cap">THE Rev. Silas Eaton was dead.</p>
-
-<p>It was May, and the little orchard
-behind the parsonage was
-like a white and perfumed cloak flung on
-the shoulder of a bare hillside which was,
-all the rest of it, rocky pasture. Under
-the trees, and in the shelter of the stone
-walls, the grass was growing green. The
-apple blossoms were just beginning to
-fall; in any breath of wind single petals,
-white, stained outside with crimson, came
-down in flurries, like gusts of warm and
-aromatic snow. There was a stir of life
-everywhere. In the parsonage garden
-crown imperials had pushed their strong
-stalks through the damp earth, and peonies
-were reaching up long slender arms,
-each with its red curled fist of leaves,
-reluctant to expand until certain of the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_67" id="Page_67">[67]</a></span>
-sun. The ground was spongy beneath
-the foot, and there were small springs
-bubbling up under every winter-bleached
-tuft of last year’s grass. The air, full of
-the scent of earth and growing things,
-was warm and sweet, yet with an edge
-of cold&mdash;the sword of frost in a velvet
-scabbard.</p>
-
-<p>Life&mdash;life: and in the upper chamber
-of the parsonage the master lay dead.</p>
-
-<p>One of the children had put a bunch of
-apple blossoms on the table at the head
-of the bed. They were not appropriate&mdash;the
-soft, rosy flowers beside the hard
-face there on the pillow; the face with
-its thatch of gray hair over the narrow,
-domelike brow, seamed and cut with
-wrinkles; the anxious, melancholy lips
-set in such icy and eternal indifference&mdash;the
-face of the religious egotist, stamped
-with inexorable sincerity, stern and cold
-and mean. Not a father’s face. But his
-daughter had put her handful of snowy
-flowers on the pine table, their little
-gnarled black stems thrust tightly down
-into a tumbler of water. And then she
-went tiptoeing out of the silent room.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_68" id="Page_68">[68]</a></span>
-She heard her mother’s little, light voice
-downstairs in the parlor, and Elder
-Barnes’s low, respectful murmur in response.
-They were “making the arrangements.”
-Esther’s heart stood still,
-not with grief, but with misery at the
-strangeness of it all&mdash;her silent, meek,
-obedient mother saying what should or
-what should not happen to&mdash;father!</p>
-
-<p>“And, Mr. Barnes, if it will not be a
-trouble, will you find out for me how
-much it would cost to send a telegram to
-my brother in Mercer?”</p>
-
-<p>Esther, leaning over the banisters in
-the upper hall, opened her lips with astonishment.
-A telegram! It gave the
-child a sense of the dreadful importance
-of this May day as nothing else had done.
-The thought of the expense of it came
-next, sobering that curious sense of elation
-which is part of bereavement.</p>
-
-<p>“Mother oughtn’t to do that. It will
-cost&mdash;oh, it will cost at least a dollar!”</p>
-
-<p>This fifteen-year old Esther had a
-certain grim practicality, born of a childhood
-in a minister’s family on five hun<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_69" id="Page_69">[69]</a></span>dred
-dollars a year. A dollar! And that
-uncle in Mercer, whom she had never
-seen, who had quarreled with her mother
-because she married her father, and who
-was so rich and powerful (according to a
-newspaper paragraph she had once read)&mdash;this
-uncle, who had had no connection
-with them in all these years&mdash;what was
-the use of wasting a dollar in telegraphing
-him? She meant to say so; and yet,
-when she went downstairs, after Elder
-Barnes had gone, and found her little
-mother standing at the window, looking
-blankly out at the garden, there was something
-in the mild, faded face that kept
-the girl silent. She came up and put her
-strong young arm about her, and kissed
-her softly.</p>
-
-<p>“Mother, won’t you lie down?”</p>
-
-<p>“No, dear; I am not tired. Mr. Barnes
-has been very kind in telling me what
-must be done. I do hope everything will
-be as&mdash;<em>he</em> would wish.”</p>
-
-<p>They did not speak for a little while,
-and then Esther said, in a low voice,
-“Mother, I don’t want to worry you, and&mdash;and
-perhaps it’s very soon to speak of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_70" id="Page_70">[70]</a></span>
-it, but have you thought at all of what is
-going to become of us?”</p>
-
-<p>Her mother put up her hand with a
-sort of shiver. “No, no; not yet. We
-mustn’t talk of that yet. Oh, Esther, he
-is dead! Poor Silas&mdash;poor Silas!” She
-caught her breath like a child, and looked
-up at her tall daughter in a frightened
-way.</p>
-
-<p>Esther nodded and cried a little; then
-she wiped her eyes, and said, hesitating:
-“You’re going to get a crêpe veil, aren’t
-you, mother, and a black dress? And I
-think I ought to have a black dress.”</p>
-
-<p>“We haven’t any money for new
-clothes, Essie,” Mrs. Eaton answered
-tremulously.</p>
-
-<p>“But I think we ought to wear black,”
-Esther protested. “It isn’t proper not
-to.”</p>
-
-<p>The other sighed with anxiety. “I
-don’t see how we can. He would not
-wish us to waste the money.”</p>
-
-<p>They were very intimate, these two;
-for each had found the other a shelter
-from the fierce integrity which had ruled
-the family life. And now instinctively<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_71" id="Page_71">[71]</a></span>
-they nestled together, panting and chirping
-like two frightened birds, and saying
-to each other, “<em>He</em> would wish this, or
-that.”</p>
-
-<p>But he was dead, and the face of life
-was suddenly changed to them both.
-The withdrawal of the dominant righteous
-will of husband and father made an
-abrupt silence in their lives&mdash;a silence
-which was as overwhelming in its way as
-grief. To the mother it was as though
-having been borne helplessly along on
-some powerful arm, she had been suddenly
-set down on her own feet, and bidden
-to lead and carry others. Esther’s
-frightened question, “What is going to
-become of us?” echoed in her ears like a
-crash of bewildering sound. She had no
-answer; all she knew was that she must
-take care of the children; work for them;
-fight for them&mdash;poor little weak creature!&mdash;if
-necessary. She was thirty-five,
-this mother, but she looked much
-older. Once she must have been pretty;
-one knew that by the startled softness
-of her hazel eyes and the delicately cut
-pale lips; but her forehead, rounded like<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_72" id="Page_72">[72]</a></span>
-a child’s, was worn and full of lines,
-and her whole expression so timid and
-anxious and deprecating that one only
-thought of what her life must have been
-to cut so deep a stamp on such gentle
-and vague material. It had been, since
-her marriage, a very uneventful life, its
-keenest excitement the making both ends
-meet on her husband’s salary. Before
-that there had, indeed, been the keen
-and exciting experience of marrying in
-opposition to her father’s command, and
-being practically disowned by her people.
-She was Lydia Blair, a girl of good
-family, gentle and dutiful, as girls were
-expected to be thirty years ago&mdash;one of
-those pleasant girls who let their elders
-and betters think for them, and are loved
-as one loves comfortable and inanimate
-things. And then, suddenly, had appeared
-this harsh, fiery, narrow New
-England minister, of another denomination,
-of another temperament&mdash;for that
-matter, of another class; and she had
-developed a will of her own and married
-him. Why? Everybody who knew her
-asked, “Why?” Perhaps afterwards she<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_73" id="Page_73">[73]</a></span>
-herself asked why&mdash;afterwards, when he
-became so intent upon saving his own
-soul that he had no time to win his children’s
-love or to make love to his wife.
-By the time he came to die, very likely
-he had forgotten he ever had made love
-to her. He called her “Mrs. Eaton,”
-and he was as used to her as he was to
-his battered old desk or his worn Bible.
-But when he came to die, he lay in his
-bed and watched her as he had not done
-these fifteen years; and once he said,
-when she brought him his medicine,
-“You’ve been a good wife, Mrs.
-Eaton;” and once, “You’re very kind,
-Lily.” But this was at the end, and the
-doctor said his mind was wandering.
-And then the end had come, in the
-spring night, towards dawn; and now he
-was lying still, as indifferent to the soft
-weather, the shower of apple blossoms,
-the two children whispering about the
-house, the wife staring, dry-eyed, out into
-the sunshine&mdash;as indifferent as he always
-had been.</p>
-
-<p>Well, well; he was a good man, they
-said; and now he had gone to find the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_74" id="Page_74">[74]</a></span>
-God whom he had defamed and vilified
-under the name of religion, imputing to
-Him meanness and cruelty and revenge&mdash;the
-passions of his own poor human
-nature.</p>
-
-<p>And may that God have mercy on his
-soul!</p>
-
-
-<h3>II</h3>
-
-<p>Robert Blair came into the dining-room,
-holding the “dollar telegram” in
-his hand. His wife looked up at him,
-smiling.</p>
-
-<p>“It is really shameful the way business
-pursues you! I am going to tell Samuel
-to burn all dispatches that come here.
-Your office is the place for those horrid
-yellow papers.”</p>
-
-<p>“It isn’t business this time, Nellie;
-it’s death.”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, Robert!”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh,” he hastened to explain, “it’s
-nothing that touches us. My sister
-Lydia’s husband is dead. You have
-heard me speak of my sister Lydia,
-haven’t you? It was long before your
-day, you baby, that she married him.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_75" id="Page_75">[75]</a></span>
-Ah, well, what a pretty girl she was!”
-He sat down, shook his head when the
-man offered him some soup, and opened
-his napkin thoughtfully. “Well, he’s
-dead. He was a most objectionable person”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Blair looked at the butler’s back
-as he stood at the sideboard, and raised
-her eyebrows; but her husband went on,
-a wrinkle like a cut deepening on his
-forehead:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“My father forbade it&mdash;did I never
-tell you about it?&mdash;but Lydia, who had
-always been a nonentity, suddenly acquired
-a will, and married him. My father
-never forgave her. She evidently
-didn’t care for any affection that didn’t
-include him, and cut herself off from all
-of us. Of course I’m sorry for her now;
-but I don’t feel that I have anything to
-reproach myself with.” He tapped the
-table with impatient fingers, and told the
-butler that he didn’t want his claret
-<em>boiled</em>. “Haven’t you any sense, Samuel?
-You’re a perfect fool about wine;
-here, throw that out of the window, and
-get me a fresh bottle!”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_76" id="Page_76">[76]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Blair was a beautiful young woman,
-who, two years before, had married
-this irascible, successful, dogmatic man,
-and (so Mercer said) could wind him
-round any one of her pretty jeweled fingers
-whenever she wanted to. He certainly
-was very much in love&mdash;and so
-was she, though her particular world
-never believed it, alleging that she was
-not indifferent to the loaves and fishes.</p>
-
-<p>But the fact was Mrs. Blair took the
-loaves and fishes with a childlike delight
-which meant appreciation, certainly, but
-not avarice. She enjoyed her wealth,
-and her life, and herself, immensely and
-openly; and that was her charm to her
-husband, a man immersed in large affairs,
-sagacious, powerful, and without imagination.
-He was a cultivated man, because
-his forbears had been educated people,
-of sober, comfortable wealth; hence he
-had gone to college, like other young
-men of his class, and had traveled, and
-had acquired an intellectual, or rather a
-commercial knowledge of Art. But, until
-he married, every instinct was for
-power, and the making of money. After<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_77" id="Page_77">[77]</a></span>
-that, though the guiding principle remained
-the same, a sense of beauty did
-awaken in him. He never flagged in his
-fierce and joyous and cruel passion for
-getting; but he delighted in his wife&mdash;perhaps
-as one of his own enormous machines
-might have delighted in a ray of
-sunlight dancing across its steel shafts,
-and flickering through the thunderous
-whir of its driving-wheel. He loaded
-the girl he married with every luxury;
-almost immediately she found she had
-nothing left to desire&mdash;from dogs to diamonds,
-houses, yachts, or pictures. She,
-poor child, realized no deprivation in seeing
-every wish fulfilled, and thought herself
-the luckiest and the happiest woman
-in the world. Her money, combined with
-a good deal of common-sense, gave her
-the power to interfere helpfully in the
-lives of less fortunate people. She called
-it Philanthropy, and found playing Providence
-to the halt, the maimed, and the
-blind a really keen interest. Her impulse
-was always to “manage”; and so, when
-her husband, frowning, and perhaps a little
-less satisfied with himself than usual,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_78" id="Page_78">[78]</a></span>
-began to talk about his sister’s affairs,
-Mrs. Blair was instantly interested.</p>
-
-<p>“Of course her husband’s death will
-make a difference in her income?” she
-said, as they went upstairs to the library.
-“A country minister’s salary doesn’t
-amount to much anyhow; but”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Well, she made her bed,” he interrupted
-sharply; “she ought to be willing
-to lie in it!”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, yes, of course; but now the man
-is dead, it’s different. I know you want
-to do something for her, you are so generous.”</p>
-
-<p>He pulled her pretty ear at that, and
-told her she was a flattering little humbug.
-“What do you want, diplomat?
-You’ll bankrupt me yet. Am I to build
-a palace for Lily? Look here, I wrote
-that West Virginia college president to-day
-and told him I’d give him the money
-he wanted. It’s all your doing, but I
-get the name of a great educator.”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, Robert, how good you are! I
-think that ought to silence the people
-that say you ‘grind the face of the poor.’
-I saw that in the paper to-day. Beasts!<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_79" id="Page_79">[79]</a></span>
-and you are so generous! I tell you what
-I want: I want you to have them come
-here, your sister and the children”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“You angel!” he said. “No; that’s
-dangerous. We mightn’t like the brats.
-The boy’s name is Silas. I don’t think I
-could stand a cub named Silas. But the
-girl wouldn’t be so bad. As for Lily (we
-used to call her Lily when she was a girl),
-she is one of those gentle, colorless women,
-all virtue and no opinions, whom
-anybody could live with. Rather a fool,
-you know. But we’ll have them come
-and make us a visit, if it won’t bore you.
-If we like it, we can prolong it. Anyhow,
-I’ll see that poor Lil has a decent
-income. You know, my father didn’t
-leave her a cent. The old gentleman
-said he wouldn’t have ‘that hell-fire
-Presbyterian use any of his money for
-his damned heathen!’ But I’ll look
-after her now.”</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>Thus it was that a home was prepared
-for Silas Eaton’s widow; the offer of it
-came the day after the funeral, when she
-sat down to face the future. She had<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_80" id="Page_80">[80]</a></span>
-gone over her assets, in her halting, feminine
-way, counting up the dollars on her
-fingers, and subtracting the debts with a
-stubby lead-pencil on the back of an old
-envelope; and she had discovered that
-when all the expenses of the funeral were
-paid she would have in the bank one
-hundred and seventy-five dollars. If she
-could manage to sell her husband’s very
-limited library, she might add a few dollars
-to that sum; but very few.</p>
-
-<p>One hundred and seventy-five dollars!
-She must go to some city, and go to
-work, so that Silas and Esther might be
-educated. She had got as far as that
-when her brother’s letter came. He
-would have come himself, he said, but
-was detained by an annoying strike in
-one of his rolling-mills, and so wrote to
-ask her to come, with the children, and
-visit him for a little while; “then we’ll
-see what can be done; but don’t worry
-about ways and means. I will see to all
-that.”</p>
-
-<p>She read the straightforward, kindly
-words, her heart beating so she could
-scarcely breathe. Then she covered her<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_81" id="Page_81">[81]</a></span>
-face with her hands, and trembled with
-excitement and relief. “Oh,” she said,
-“the children won’t be poor! Robert
-will take care of us.”</p>
-
-
-<h3>III</h3>
-
-<p>When Mrs. Eaton went to Mercer, the
-change in her life was absolute and bewildering.
-Robert Blair’s enormous wealth
-was, at first, simply not to be realized.
-The subdued and refined magnificence of
-the house conveyed nothing to his sister’s
-mind, because she had no standard
-of value. The pictures and tapestries
-implied not money, but only beauty and
-joy, for she had never dreamed of buying
-anything but food and clothes; so how
-could she guess that all the money of all
-her sixteen years on a minister’s salary
-would not have purchased, say, the small
-misty square of canvas that held in one
-corner a wonderful and noble and peasant
-name?</p>
-
-<p>The first night in the great wainscoted
-dining-room, with a man bringing unknown
-dishes to her elbow, with candles<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_82" id="Page_82">[82]</a></span>
-shining on elaborate and useless pieces
-of silver, with the glow of firelight flickering
-out from under a superb chimney-piece
-of Mexican marble, and dancing
-about the stately and dignified room&mdash;the
-beauty and the graciousness and the
-wonder of it was an overwhelming experience,
-though she had not the dimmest
-idea of the fortune it represented&mdash;a
-fortune notorious and envied the land
-over. That she had had no share in it
-until now did not wound her in the least;
-she was grateful for the warmth and the
-comfort and the kindness, now they had
-come; she never harked back to the painful
-years of silence and forgetfulness.</p>
-
-<p>Her brother and his wife watched her,
-amused and interested; her dazzled admiration
-of everything was half touching,
-half droll. But what a confession it was!
-Eleanor Blair realized this, and she said
-to herself, warmly, that she would make
-up to Robert’s sister for the past. She
-was in her element in arranging her
-sister-in-law’s future; she made a dozen
-plans for her in the first week; but her
-husband laughed and shook his head.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_83" id="Page_83">[83]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“Wait,” he said; “time enough when
-we see how we get along.”</p>
-
-<p>But they got along very well. The
-children, after the first shy awkwardness
-had worn off, were really attractive.
-Silas, an eager brown-eyed boy of eleven,
-lovable in spite of his name, made artless
-and pretty love to his pretty aunt, who
-found him a delightful plaything. “The
-serious Esther,” as her uncle called her,
-was a friendly little creature, when one
-came to know her; her common-sense
-commended her to Mr. Blair, and her
-dressmaking and her education were an
-immediate interest to her aunt.</p>
-
-<p>So it came about that the visit was
-prolonged, and the project of a little establishment
-of her own for Mrs. Eaton
-gradually given up; at all events, for the
-present. It was very satisfactory as it
-was. The house was so big, they were
-not in the way; and Mrs. Eaton’s mourning
-kept her in the background in regard
-to society&mdash;which “was just as well,”
-Mrs. Blair admitted, smiling to herself&mdash;but
-it made no difference in her usefulness.
-She was really quite useful in one<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_84" id="Page_84">[84]</a></span>
-way or another; she could write an intelligent
-note to a tradesman, or reply
-(by formula) to a begging letter; so, by
-and by, she was practically her sister-in-law’s
-secretary, and certainly the Blairs
-had never had either a maid or a butler
-who could begin to arrange flowers for
-a dinner party as Mrs. Eaton did. She
-was silent, and rather vague, but always
-gentle, and ready and eager to fetch and
-carry for anybody. She so rarely expressed
-any opinion of her own, that
-when she did the two strong and good-natured
-people who made her life so easy
-for her could hardly take it seriously.
-She did, to be sure, decline to change her
-son’s objectionable name, on the ground
-that it was his name, and so could not be
-changed; “and,” Mrs. Blair complained
-once, “she won’t let me send Esther
-to dancing-school. I asked her if she
-thought dancing was wrong, and she said,
-‘Oh, no; but Mr. Eaton did.’ Isn’t it
-funny?”</p>
-
-<p>Robert Blair laughed, and said he
-would straighten that out. But, somehow,
-it was not straightened out. Esther<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_85" id="Page_85">[85]</a></span>
-teased, and Mrs. Blair was just a little
-impatient and sarcastic. But Esther did
-not go to dancing-school.</p>
-
-<p>“I’m sorry to displease you, Eleanor,”
-Mrs. Eaton said, shrinking as she spoke,
-like a frightened animal which expects a
-blow, “but&mdash;I can’t allow it. Mr. Eaton
-would not have wished it.”</p>
-
-<p>Yet, negative as she seemed, the little
-quiet woman was keenly alive to the advantages
-of this full, rich life for the children,
-and, indeed, for herself. Mere rest
-was such a luxury to her, for she had
-lived and worked as only a country minister’s
-wife must. So, to feel no anxiety,
-to have delicate food, to know the touch
-of fine linen,&mdash;in fact, to be comfortable,
-meant more to her than even her brother,
-enjoying his generosity towards her, could
-possibly imagine.</p>
-
-<p>So life began for his sister and her
-children in Robert Blair’s beautiful great
-house in the new part of Mercer,&mdash;the
-new part which is not offended by the
-sight of those great black chimneys roaring
-with sapphire and saffron flames, or
-belching monstrous coils of black smoke,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_86" id="Page_86">[86]</a></span>
-threaded with showers of sparks,&mdash;those
-chimneys and roofs which are not beautiful
-to look upon, but which have made
-the “new” part of Mercer possible.
-When Mrs. Eaton came to her brother’s
-house, these unlovely foundations of his
-fortune were still for a month. There
-was a strike on, and Mercer was cleaner
-and quieter than it had been for many
-months,&mdash;in fact, than it had been since
-the last strike. The clang and clamor of
-the machine-shops, the scream of the
-steel saws biting into the living, glowing
-rails, the thunderous crash of plates being
-tested in the hot gloom of the foundries,
-had all stopped.</p>
-
-<p>“And, oh dear me,” said Mrs. Blair,
-“what a relief it is! Of course it’s very
-annoying to have them strike, and all
-that, but when one drives into town to
-get to the other side of the river, the
-noise is perfectly intolerable. And when
-the wind is in that direction, we can really
-hear the roar even out here.”</p>
-
-<p>She said this to her clergyman, who
-looked at her with a veiled sparkle of humor
-in his handsome eyes.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_87" id="Page_87">[87]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“So the puddlers shall starve to make
-a Mercer holiday,” he said good-naturedly.</p>
-
-<p>“If they choose to strike, they must
-take the consequences,” she replied, with
-some spirit. “Besides, they are the most
-ungrateful creatures! Well, I’m sure I
-don’t know what we’re coming to!”</p>
-
-<p>“Something may be coming to us,”
-her visitor said, with a whimsical look,
-but he sighed, and got up to take his
-leave. His charming parishioner sighed
-too, prettily, and said with much feeling,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Of course, Mr. West, if there are
-any cases that need help, you’ll let me
-know.”</p>
-
-<p>“But, Nellie,” said Mrs. Eaton, who
-had been sitting silent, as usual, and quite
-overlooked by the other two, “is there
-any use in helping the people who are
-in trouble because they are out of work,
-and yet not letting them go to work?”</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Blair laughed, in spite of herself,
-the protest was so unexpected, and so
-absurd, coming from this meek source.
-“My dear,” she said, “you don’t under<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_88" id="Page_88">[88]</a></span>stand;
-they can go to work if they want
-to.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well,” Mrs. Eaton said anxiously, “I
-should think, either they are wrong, and
-so you shouldn’t help them, or they are
-right, and they ought to get what they
-want.”</p>
-
-<p>Her sister stared at her, and then
-laughed again, greatly amused; but William
-West put on his glasses and gave
-her a keen look.</p>
-
-<p>“Mrs. Eaton, don’t you want to help
-us on the Organized Relief Association?”</p>
-
-<p>“Yes, sir,” said Lydia Eaton, “if
-there’s anything I can do.”</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t want to steal your services
-away from any other parson,” he said
-pleasantly. “I suppose you belong to
-Mr. Hudson’s flock? You are a Presbyterian,
-of course?”</p>
-
-<p>“No, sir, I am not,” she said, the color
-rising in her face.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, then you do belong to me?” he
-said smiling.</p>
-
-<p>“I’m not an Episcopalian,” she answered,
-with a frightened look.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_89" id="Page_89">[89]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“Then what on earth are you?” Mrs.
-Blair asked her, laughing.</p>
-
-<p>“I’m not&mdash;anything,” she said, her
-voice trembling; “but, Eleanor, please
-don’t speak of it. The children must not
-know it. Mr. Eaton would want them
-to be members of his church. So we
-must always go there.”</p>
-
-<p>There was an instant’s awkward pause.
-Mrs. Blair looked very disapproving.</p>
-
-<p>“Why, Lydia,” she said, “do you
-mean you don’t believe things? Why, I
-never had a doubt in my life!” she exclaimed,
-turning to the minister, who
-was silent.</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Eaton caught her breath, and
-looked at him too, her mild eyes full of
-pain. “Nobody ever asked me before. I
-am sorry, but I can’t help it. The Bible
-says people go to hell; but God is good,
-so I don’t believe the Bible. But Mr.
-Eaton would wish me to go to church.”</p>
-
-<p>The perfectly simple logic, so primitive
-as to stop at “the Bible says,” was irresistibly
-funny; yet, to William West, infinitely
-touching. But he put the discussion
-aside quietly.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_90" id="Page_90">[90]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“So you will come on our committee?”
-he said. “We shall be glad to have
-you.”</p>
-
-<p>But when he went away he laughed a
-little to himself. “The iron heel of Edwards,
-I suppose. But how direct! Two
-and two make four. She is incapable of
-understanding that they sometimes make
-five.”</p>
-
-<p>But Mrs. Blair did not dismiss it so
-lightly. She was annoyed at the protest
-about the strikers, and that impelled her
-to straighten out Mrs. Eaton’s religious
-beliefs. There was some irritation in her
-voice as she began, but she was in earnest,
-and stopped in the middle of “proofs”
-to tell Samuel to say she was “not at
-home.”</p>
-
-<p>“But, Eleanor, you are,” Mrs. Eaton
-protested in a frightened way.</p>
-
-<p>“My dear, that is a form of speech.”</p>
-
-<p>“But it makes Samuel tell a lie,” she
-said nervously.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, Lily, don’t be silly,” Mrs. Blair
-said impatiently, and then jumped from
-hell to the strikers,&mdash;though, as it happened,
-the distance between them was<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_91" id="Page_91">[91]</a></span>
-not so great after all. “Really, now,
-Lydia, I don’t think you ought to speak
-as you did before Mr. West about the
-men. In the first place, business isn’t
-philanthropy, and Robert can’t give in to
-them. And in the second place, they are
-behaving outrageously! I should think
-you would have more loyalty to Robert
-than to seem to uphold them.”</p>
-
-<p>“I only meant”&mdash;Mrs. Eaton began
-breathlessly.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, my dear, you don’t know what
-you mean,” Mrs. Blair interrupted, laughing
-and good-natured again. “But just
-remember, will you, how kind Robert is?
-It seems to me he is always doing things
-for this ungrateful place. Look at the
-fountain in the square; that’s the last
-thing.”</p>
-
-<p>“But wouldn’t the men rather have
-had running water in the tenements?”
-Mrs. Eaton said; “there are only hydrants
-down in the back yards.”</p>
-
-<p>However, as that first year in Mercer
-slipped by, there were very few such jars.
-The strike ended early in the fall, and
-there was nothing to call out any objec<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_92" id="Page_92">[92]</a></span>tionable
-opinion from Mrs. Eaton on that
-line.</p>
-
-<p>“As for Lydia,” Robert Blair said
-once, “you say ‘go,’ and she goeth. She
-has absolutely no will of her own.”</p>
-
-<p>This was, apparently, quite true. At
-all events, she had a genius for obedience,
-and a terror of responsibility. In
-the organized relief-work which Mrs.
-Blair’s clergyman had proposed, obedience
-necessitated responsibility sometimes, and
-no one knew how the silent little creature
-suffered when she had to decide anything.
-But she did decide, usually with remarkable
-but very simple common-sense.</p>
-
-<p>“And always on the supposition that
-two and two make four,” Mr. West said
-to himself. He found her literalness a
-little aggravating just at first, but it was
-very diverting. He used to put on his
-glasses and watch her anxious face when
-she talked to him or received his orders
-(for such his requests or suggestions
-seemed to her); and he would ask her
-questions to draw out her astounding
-simplicity and directness of thought, and
-find her as refreshing as a child. She<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_93" id="Page_93">[93]</a></span>
-used to sit up before him, saying, “Yes,
-sir,” and “No, sir,” and looking, with her
-startled eyes, like a little gray rabbit&mdash;for
-at the end of a year she took off her
-black dress, and wore instead soft grays
-that were very pretty and becoming. Her
-absolute literalness gave him much entertainment;
-but she never knew it. If
-she had guessed it, she would have been
-humbly glad to have been ridiculous, if it
-had amused him.</p>
-
-<p>And so the first year and a half went
-by.</p>
-
-
-<h3>IV</h3>
-
-<p>It was the next winter that she asked
-her first question.</p>
-
-<p>“Mr. West,” she said, after making
-notes of this or that case that needed
-looking after (for she was practically visitor
-for St. James now),&mdash;“Mr. West, I
-would like to ask you something.”</p>
-
-<p>“Do, my dear Mrs. Eaton,” he answered
-heartily.</p>
-
-<p>“I would like to ask you,” she said,
-her eyes fixed on his, to lose no shade
-of meaning in his reply, “do you think it<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_94" id="Page_94">[94]</a></span>
-would be right for one person to live on
-money that another person had stolen?”</p>
-
-<p>“If they knew it was stolen, of course
-not!” he said, smiling. “Has a pickpocket
-offered to go halves with you?”</p>
-
-<p>“No, sir,” she answered, so gravely
-that her listener’s eyes twinkled. She
-made no explanation, but went away with
-a troubled look. The next time she saw
-him she had another question:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“But suppose the person who lived on
-the money the other person stole needed
-it very much. Suppose they hadn’t anything
-else in the world. Suppose their
-children hadn’t anything else. Would it
-be their business to ask where it came
-from, Mr. West?”</p>
-
-<p>“If it was their business to spend it,
-it would be,” he told her. “Oh, my
-dear lady, the question of complicity is
-a pretty big one!” He sighed, thinking
-how little she realized that she was guessing
-at the riddle of the painful earth.</p>
-
-<p>Again she went away, her face falling
-into lines of care. But William West
-never thought of the matter again. Indeed,
-he had no time to think of his quiet<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_95" id="Page_95">[95]</a></span>
-almoner; those were alarming days in
-Mercer. The echoes of that storm which
-shook not only the town, but the very
-State and nation, are still rolling and
-muttering in the dark places of the land.</p>
-
-<p>Another strike had begun in October.
-As for the deep and far-reaching causes,
-the economic and industrial necessities,
-the vast plans of organizations and trusts,
-they have no place in this statement of
-the way in which one ignorant woman
-regarded their effects&mdash;a woman living
-quietly in her brother’s house, doing her
-work, expending her little charities, trying
-to relieve the dreadful misery of those
-wintry days, with about as much success
-as a child who plays beside some terrific
-torrent and tries to dam it with his
-tiny bank of twigs and pebbles. Robert
-Blair’s sister had no economic or ethical
-theories; she had only an anguished
-heart at the suffering in that dreary mill
-town, a dreadful bewilderment at its contrast
-with the untouched luxury of her
-brother’s house. That she should find a
-child in one of the tenements dying at
-its mother’s barren breast, while her own<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_96" id="Page_96">[96]</a></span>
-children fared sumptuously every day;
-that a miserable man should curse her
-because her brother was robbing him of
-work, and warmth, and decency, even,
-while she must bless that same brother
-for what he was giving her, was a dreadful
-puzzle. As she understood the situation,
-this misery existed because her
-brother would no longer give even fourteen
-cents an hour to human beings who
-had to stand half naked in the scorch
-of intense furnaces, reeking with sweat,
-taking a breathless moment to plunge
-waist deep into tanks of cold water; to
-men who worked where the crash of
-exploding slag or the accidental tipping
-of a ladle might mean death; to gaunt
-and stunted creatures, hollow-eyed, with
-bleared and sodden faces, whose incessant
-toil to keep alive had crushed out
-the look of manhood, and left them silent,
-hopeless, brutish, with only one certainty
-in their stupefied souls: “<em>men don’t
-grow old in the mills</em>.” ... That these
-things should be, while she was clothed
-in soft raiment bought by wealth which
-these desperate beings had helped to<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_97" id="Page_97">[97]</a></span>
-create&mdash;meant to this ignorant woman
-that there was something wrong somewhere.
-It was not for her to say what or
-where. She had no ambition to reform
-the world. She did not protest against
-the “unearned increment,” nor did she
-have views as to “buying labor in the
-cheapest market.” She did not know
-anything about such phrases. The only
-thing that concerned her was whether
-she, living on her brother’s money, had
-any part or lot in the suffering about
-her? She grew nervous and haggard
-and more distrait and literal than ever.
-She wished she dared lay her troubles
-before the wise, gentle, strong man who,
-to her, was all that was good and great.
-But it did not seem to her right to criticise
-her brother to his clergyman. She
-never realized how amusing her simplicity
-might be, laid up against the enormous
-complexity of the industrial question; to
-her it was only: “If Robert is rich, and
-doesn’t give his workmen enough to live
-on, are not the children and I stealing
-from the men in living on Robert’s
-money?”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_98" id="Page_98">[98]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>This little question, applied to the relations
-of capital and labor, is of course absurd;
-but she asked it all the same, this
-soft, negative, biddable creature. She
-had gone to take some food to a hungry
-household, and she went away burning
-with shame because she was not hungry!
-It had been a cold, bright November
-day; she went past one of the silent furnaces
-along the black cinder path to the
-river-bank, where the flat cones of slag
-were dumped; some of them were still
-slightly warm.</p>
-
-<p>It was quiet enough here to think:
-After all, Robert’s money did so much
-good; there was the great fountain in
-the square, and the hospital, and the free
-night school. And think of what he was
-doing for Essie and Silas! Oh, it surely
-wasn’t her business to ask why he cut
-the men’s wages down!</p>
-
-<p>There was a flare of sunset flushing
-the calm blue of the upper heavens, and
-in the river, running black and silent
-before her, a red glow smouldered and
-brightened. Behind her, and all along
-the opposite bank, the furnaces were still.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_99" id="Page_99">[99]</a></span>
-Oh, the misery of that black stillness!
-If only she could see again the monstrous
-sheets of flame, orange, and azure,
-bursting with a roar of sparks from under
-the dampers of the great chimneys. It
-would mean work and warmth and food
-to so many! By some unsuggested flash
-of memory the parsonage garden came
-swiftly to her mind. It must be lying
-chill in the wintry sunset; she could see
-the little house behind it, with its bare,
-clean poverty; she wished she were back
-in it again with the two children! The
-beauty and the luxury of her brother’s
-house seemed suffocating and intolerable;
-and yet would it feed the strikers if
-she should starve?&mdash;the vision of her
-own destitution without her brother’s
-money was appalling. She sat down on
-a piece of slag, a little faint at the
-thought. Just then, from down below
-her, on the great heap of refuse, she
-heard voices.</p>
-
-<p>“Come farther up; they’re hotter
-higher up,” a woman said shrilly.</p>
-
-<p>Then a miserable little group came
-clambering over the great cones of cool<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_100" id="Page_100">[100]</a></span>ing
-slag, and a child cried out joyously,
-“This here one’s hot, mammy!”</p>
-
-<p>The woman, catching sight of Robert
-Blair’s sister, though not recognizing her,
-said harshly:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“You bet hangman Blair has a fire in
-his house to-day. Well, thank God, he
-ain’t made no cut in slag, yet; we can
-get a bit of warmth here. I wish he may
-freeze in his bed!”</p>
-
-<p>Lydia Eaton answered, stammering and
-incoherent, something about the cold
-weather; and then, she was so overstrained
-and nervous, she burst out crying.
-“Oh, won’t you please let me give
-you this?” she said, and put some money
-into the woman’s hand.</p>
-
-<p>She went away, stumbling, because her
-eyes were blurred with tears, and saying
-to herself,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“What <em>shall</em> I do?”</p>
-
-<p>She almost ran into Mr. West on Baker
-Street, and stopped abruptly, putting her
-hands on his arm, and, in her agitation,
-shaking it violently, her whole face convulsed
-and terrified.</p>
-
-<p>“Tell me&mdash;you know; you are good:<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_101" id="Page_101">[101]</a></span>
-whose fault is it? Robert’s&mdash;for all&mdash;this?”</p>
-
-<p>He understood instantly, and was very
-gentle with her.</p>
-
-<p>“My dear Mrs. Eaton, that is a very
-big question. It isn’t any one man’s
-fault. It seems strange, but the weather
-in India may be the reason we are all
-so wretched in Mercer. Your brother
-may be forced to make this cut by great
-laws, which, perhaps, you cannot understand.”</p>
-
-<p>“But <em>we</em> go on being warm,” she said,
-“and it is cold. Oh, those little children
-had to get warm on the slag! Oh,
-sir, I don’t believe the Saviour would
-have been warm while the children were
-cold!”</p>
-
-<p>She looked at him passionately, abruptly
-applying the precepts of the
-Founder of his religion.</p>
-
-<p>“Ah, well, you know,” William West
-said kindly, “this whole matter is so
-enormously complicated”&mdash;And then
-he stammered a little, for, after all, how
-could he explain to this poor little frightened,
-ignorant soul that we have learned<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_102" id="Page_102">[102]</a></span>
-how injurious to the race would be the
-literal application of the logic of the Sermon
-on the Mount? Nowadays the disciple
-is wiser than his master, and the
-servant more prudent than his Lord; we
-know that to feed the five thousand with
-loaves and fishes, without receiving some
-equivalent, would be to pauperize them.
-But of course Mrs. Eaton could not be
-made to understand that. The clergyman
-quieted her, somehow; perhaps just
-by his gentle pitifulness; or else her reverence
-for him silenced her. She did
-not ask him any more questions; and
-there was no one else to ask, except her
-brother, and just now it would have been
-hard to find the chance to ask Robert
-Blair anything.</p>
-
-<p>The strike had slowly involved all the
-mills owned by a syndicate of which he
-was chairman. He had to go to South
-Bend, where the great smelting furnaces
-are; he was mobbed there, though with
-no worse results than the unpleasantness
-of eggs and cabbage stalks; still, the
-wickedness of those dreadful creatures
-was something too awful, Mrs. Blair said,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_103" id="Page_103">[103]</a></span>
-crying with anger and fright over the
-newspaper account. At still another mill
-town a ghastly box reached him, labeled:
-“Starved by the Blair syndicate.” Robert
-Blair paled and sickened at its contents,
-but he swore under his breath:
-“Let them starve their brats, if they
-want to; it isn’t my business. There’s
-work for them if they want it; but the
-curs would rather loaf. This country
-can go to the devil before I’ll give in to
-them!”</p>
-
-<p>He did not get back to Mercer until
-December. “I wouldn’t let the fools
-keep me from you on Christmas,” he told
-his wife savagely, and caught her in his
-arms with a sort of rage. “Were you very
-lonely? You’ve been nervous&mdash;I can
-see it in your face. You are paler!”
-He ground his teeth; that those brutes
-should have made her paler!</p>
-
-<p>“Of course I was lonely,” she said,
-smiling, though her eyes were bright
-with tears, “and I’ve been frightened
-almost to death about you, too. Oh,
-that mob!”</p>
-
-<p>“You little goose; didn’t I tell you<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_104" id="Page_104">[104]</a></span>
-there was no danger? I always had two
-detectives. But I used to get anxious
-about you. I telegraphed the mayor to
-detail an officer to be always about the
-house. Heaven knows what’s going to
-be the end of this business, Nell! Well,
-sweetheart, may I have some dinner, or
-must I go and dress first?”</p>
-
-<p>“No. You’re dreadfully dusty, but I
-can’t lose sight of you for a moment,”
-she said gayly. “Robert, I should have
-died if you hadn’t been at home for
-Christmas!”</p>
-
-<p>His sister and the children met him at
-the dining-room door&mdash;Silas, capering
-about with delight; Esther, prettier than
-ever, coming to hang on his arm, and rub
-her cheek against his shoulder, and say
-how glad she was to see him.</p>
-
-<p>“Robert, it’s perfectly disgusting,”
-Mrs. Blair complained, “but a delegation
-insists upon seeing you to-night; they
-are coming about eight.”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, confound it!” he said frowning;
-“the strike, of course? A lot of parsons
-meddling with what they know nothing
-about.”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_105" id="Page_105">[105]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“There are parsons, I suppose,” she
-said, “but the mayor is coming. Do get
-rid of them as soon as you can, so that
-I may have a little of you.”</p>
-
-<p>She looked so pretty as she sat at the
-head of her table, beseeching him, that
-he declared he would kick the delegation
-out if they stayed over ten minutes; then
-he tossed a small white velvet box across
-the roses in the big silver bowl in the
-middle of the table, and watched her flash
-of joy as she opened it.</p>
-
-<p>“It seems to me I have some more
-boxes, somewhere,” he said good-humoredly.
-“There, Essie! if your aunt
-Eleanor had packed me off to get into
-my dress-suit, I wouldn’t have found this
-one in my pocket. Lydia, you sober old
-lady, can you wear that? As for you,
-Silas, you don’t want any gewgaws, do
-you? We fellows think more of a bit of
-paper with three figures on it, hey?”</p>
-
-<p>“There! there’s the bell. It’s your
-horrid delegation,” Mrs. Blair cried.
-“Just let them wait till you finish dinner.
-And do get rid of them quickly.
-Mr. Hudson, Lydia’s minister, will be<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_106" id="Page_106">[106]</a></span>
-there; tell him to wait a minute when
-the others have gone. I want to speak
-to him.”</p>
-
-<p>“I thought little Hudson had more
-sense,” Robert Blair grumbled, rising and
-going into the library to meet a dozen
-of his fellow-citizens, some of them men
-with grave and startled faces, who from
-pity for the three thousand fools who
-were turning Mercer upside down, and
-from good-humored interest in the affairs
-of their powerful townsman, were beginning
-to feel the sting of personal alarm
-about their own concerns.</p>
-
-<p>These men were saying to each other
-what the newspapers had been saying
-for two months, that Robert Blair, for
-vanity or obstinacy or greed, was bringing
-alarming disaster not merely upon a
-few thousand desperate and hungry and
-unreasonable puddlers, but upon the respectable
-well-to-do business population
-of his city.</p>
-
-<p>“And he’s got to stop it!” the mayor
-said angrily.</p>
-
-<p>“It would be a good job if somebody
-would blow him up with dynamite,” said<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_107" id="Page_107">[107]</a></span>
-the Baptist deacon, who was the wealthiest
-merchant in town. “He’ll swamp
-us all, if we don’t look out.”</p>
-
-<p>As for the clergyman, he looked very
-miserable, for he had the expenses of his
-church and his own salary in mind, and
-between offending Mr. Blair and not protesting
-against the continuance of the
-strike, the poor little man was between
-the devil and the deep sea.</p>
-
-<p>“Gentlemen,” said Robert Blair, calm
-and hard (“as nails,” the Baptist deacon
-said), “I appreciate the honor of your
-call, and I hope I have listened with
-proper courtesy and patience to what you
-had to say; but allow me to call your attention
-to certain facts which seem to
-contradict your assertions that you suspect
-that I am not acting for the public
-good in this matter of the strike. Mr.
-Mayor, if my wealth had been gained by
-the subversion of law and order, as you
-suggest, I am sure you could not have
-accepted any of it for your campaign&mdash;ah&mdash;<em>expenses</em>.
-For you, Mr. Davis, a
-church member, a deacon, if I mistake
-not, I need only remind you of your will<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_108" id="Page_108">[108]</a></span>ingness
-to borrow, I will not say how
-many thousands, as the basis of your
-most successful business (though I would
-not be thought to underrate your own
-prudence and economy in paying your
-women clerks a little less than they can
-live on). And as for my worthy friend
-here, the Rev. Mr. Hudson, if my money
-were, as he has so delicately implied,
-‘blood-money,’ I cannot think he would
-have accepted the contribution I had the
-privilege of making towards the alterations
-of his church. Gentlemen, you
-have felt it your duty to remonstrate
-with me upon my way of making money;
-so long as you are content to spend that
-money, I cannot believe that your remonstrances
-are based upon anything
-else than the inconvenience to yourselves
-of certain exigencies which I deeply regret,
-but which result from methods
-which commend themselves to me, and
-which, I observe, you apply in your own
-concerns: you all pay as little as you can
-for what you want; I pay as little as I
-can for labor. For your particular request
-that I submit to the demands of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_109" id="Page_109">[109]</a></span>
-the strikers, I can only say that when
-Mr. Davis will give away in charity the
-fortune built upon the outcome of those
-methods; when his honor the Mayor
-will refund the&mdash;ah&mdash;<em>expenses</em> of his
-recent successful campaign and call it
-conscience-money; when the Rev. Mr.
-Hudson will give up improving his
-church&mdash;in fact, when you will all consent
-to buy your shirts or your potatoes
-in the dearest market&mdash;I will consent
-to alter the methods whereby I have had
-the honor of serving you. We will all
-reduce together. When we can do that,
-I will recognize a moral issue, as Mr.
-Hudson so admirably expresses it. Until
-then I will try to mind my own business.
-If it were not perhaps discourteous,
-I would recommend a like course of
-action to this committee. Gentlemen, I
-bid you good-evening.”</p>
-
-<p>He was pale with rage. He forgot
-his wife’s message to the minister; he
-bowed, and stood with folded arms
-watching the withdrawal of the humiliated
-and angry delegation, “with their
-tails between their legs,” the little clergy<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_110" id="Page_110">[110]</a></span>man
-said to himself, stung by the impudent
-injustice of it all.</p>
-
-<p>Mr. Blair went into the drawing-room,
-breathing hard with the restraint he had
-put upon himself, for his coldly insolent
-words had been no outlet to his anger.
-“Don’t talk about it,” he said violently.
-“I won’t hear another word on the subject.
-Nell, I thought that little Hudson
-was not entirely a jackass, though he is
-a parson; he had the impertinence to
-say that ‘Brother West’ agreed with
-him. I don’t believe it! But if it’s
-true, why, then, West is a meddling idiot,
-like all the rest of these damned self-seeking
-philanthropists.”</p>
-
-<p>“Robert, <em>dear</em>! the children,” murmured
-Mrs. Blair nervously.</p>
-
-<p>His face was dully red, and his blue,
-fierce eyes cut like knives; one felt an
-unspoken epithet applied to the children,
-who watched him furtively, with frightened
-glances, and moved about awkwardly,
-speaking to each other in undertones.
-A moment before, everything
-had been full of charm and graciousness;
-their pretty aunt sat, indolent and grace<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_111" id="Page_111">[111]</a></span>ful,
-on a yellow sofa, leaning back against
-some ivory-satin cushions, with a great
-yellow-shaded lamp shining down on her
-delicate dark beauty; the flicker of the
-fire behind the sparkling brass dogs went
-leaping softly about the room, glowing on
-the walls, which were covered above the
-white wainscoting with yellow damask,
-on which the candle-light from the high
-sconces fell with a yellow shine; everything
-was golden and bright and rich,
-and the warm still air was delicate with
-the scent of violets. Then into it burst
-this violent and angry presence.</p>
-
-<p>There is no embarrassment quite like
-the embarrassment of listening to a person
-for whom one has a regard making a
-fool of himself. Nobody spoke. Robert
-Blair tramped up and down, kicked a little
-gilded stool half across the room,
-caught his foot in a rug, stumbled, and
-then swore. Mrs. Blair’s fox-terrier, Pat,
-shrunk under a table and looked at him,
-trembling.</p>
-
-<p>“Silas,” said Mrs. Eaton, “you and
-Esther must go upstairs.”</p>
-
-<p>“The trouble is,” said her brother to<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_112" id="Page_112">[112]</a></span>
-his wife, “these men don’t know what
-they are talking about; they don’t know
-anything about the market; they don’t
-know anything about the necessities of
-trade; all they know is their dividends;
-if <em>they</em> were cut, there’d be a howl! But
-they presume to dictate to us; to tell us
-the money is blood-money; all the same,
-they are ready enough to spend it on
-their own carcasses!”</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Eaton had closed the door on her
-children, and came and stood by a little
-silver-cluttered table, under the big yellow
-lamp. “I think Robert is quite right,”
-she said.</p>
-
-<p>The approval of this mild creature was
-like an edge laid against the tense thread
-of Robert Blair’s anger. He burst into
-a laugh.</p>
-
-<p>“Bless your heart, Lydia, I didn’t
-know you were in the room. Well, my
-dear, I’m glad you approve of me.”</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t, brother.”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, you don’t? Where are the chicks?
-Sent them out of the room because I
-used bad words? Well, I oughtn’t to
-swear in the drawing-room, that’s a fact.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_113" id="Page_113">[113]</a></span>
-<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Place aux Dames!</i> But after all, I only
-dropped the ‘<em>place</em>.’”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh!” his wife said; and then, “you
-are very naughty;” and pouted, and
-pulled him down on his knees beside
-her.</p>
-
-<p>“I thought it was very natural to be
-angry at the rug,” Mrs. Eaton said
-breathlessly; “I’ve often felt like speaking
-that way myself”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Do, Lydia, do!” Mr. Blair interrupted,
-with a laugh.</p>
-
-<p>“&mdash;but Mr. Eaton would never have
-allowed the children to hear, and”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Come, now! Haven’t I apologized?
-Don’t rub it in. I’ll give you something
-extra to put in the plate on Sunday, because
-I did pitch into your man Hudson
-like the devil! I told him so long as he
-spent ‘blood-money’ for his darned improvements,
-he couldn’t reproach me for
-earning it.”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh,” Lydia Eaton said, her hands
-squeezed together,&mdash;“oh, no! He is
-quite different from&mdash;me. It is <em>you</em> who
-are spending the&mdash;blood-money on the
-improvements. If he were spending it<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_114" id="Page_114">[114]</a></span>
-on himself, like&mdash;like me, it would be
-different.”</p>
-
-<p>Her brother looked up at her from his
-footstool at his wife’s feet, first amused,
-and then bored.</p>
-
-<p>“My dear Lily, I’m sure I don’t know
-what you are talking about. I’m sorry if
-I stepped on your toes about your parson.
-He means well. Only he is a parson,
-so I suppose he can’t help being
-rather ladylike in business matters. Do
-drop the subject; I am sick of the whole
-thing. How is your conservatory, Nell?
-Are those violets the result of your agricultural
-efforts?”</p>
-
-<p>“I think, Robert,” his sister said in
-her low voice, that shivered and broke,
-“I must just say one thing more: I must
-give you back this beautiful thing you
-gave me at dinner. And I must go away
-with the children.”</p>
-
-<p>“What under the sun!” he began,
-frowning; then he got up and stood on
-the hearth-rug, his back to the fire.
-“Lydia, I hope you are not going to be
-a fool? What are you talking about? Sit
-down,&mdash;sit down! You’re as white as<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_115" id="Page_115">[115]</a></span>
-a ghost. Lily, I’m afraid you’re a great
-goose. What’s the matter?” He could
-not help softening as he looked at her.
-She stood there by the little tottering
-table, loaded with its dozens of foolish
-bits of silver, so tense and quivering that
-even his impatient eyes could not fail to
-see her agitation.</p>
-
-<p>“Robert, you have been so kind to us;
-you are so good to us,&mdash;oh, I don’t know
-how I can do it!” she broke into an anguished
-sob,&mdash;“but I must. Mr. Eaton
-would never have let the children be supported
-on money that was not&mdash;that was
-not good.”</p>
-
-<p>There was silence; the clock in the
-hall chimed ten. Then Eleanor Blair,
-sitting up, pale and angry, said,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Well, upon my word!”</p>
-
-<p>Her husband looked at his sister with
-sudden kindness in his eyes. “Lily, you
-don’t understand. When I said what I
-did to Mr. Hudson,&mdash;of course, that has
-put it into your head,&mdash;I didn’t really
-mean it. In the first place, I’m an honest
-man (I’ll just mention that in passing),
-and it is not your business nor his<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_116" id="Page_116">[116]</a></span>
-to judge my business methods. It isn’t
-a pretty thing to look a gift-horse in the
-mouth, Lil.”</p>
-
-<p>“It isn’t what you said to Mr. Hudson,”
-she answered. “I’ve been thinking
-about it for nearly a year. Robert,
-you pay them so little, and I&mdash;I have all
-this.”</p>
-
-<p>She looked about the beautiful room
-with a sort of fright: it seemed to her
-that the warm and stately walls hid human
-misery lying close outside,&mdash;hunger
-and hatred, cold and sickness, and
-the terror of to-morrow. The impudent
-luxury of this enormous wealth struck
-her like a blow on the mouth.</p>
-
-<p>“They,” she said, with a sob, “<em>are
-hungry</em>.”</p>
-
-<p>Her brother, divided between irritation
-and amusement, was touched in spite of
-himself.</p>
-
-<p>“My dear Lily,” he said, “you can’t
-understand this thing. To put it vulgarly,
-you’ve bitten off more than you
-can chew. Look here, the men can go to
-work to-morrow if they want to; but they
-don’t want to. I offer them work, and<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_117" id="Page_117">[117]</a></span>
-they can take it or leave it. Well, they
-leave it. It’s their affair, not mine.”</p>
-
-<p>But she shook her head miserably.
-“I don’t understand it. If you were
-poor, too, it would be different.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, really!” said Mrs. Blair.</p>
-
-<p>But Robert Blair was wonderfully patient.</p>
-
-<p>“There’s another thing you must remember,
-Lily; these people are far better
-off on what I am willing to pay them
-than they were in Europe, where most of
-them came from.”</p>
-
-<p>“But, Robert,” she said passionately,
-“because they could be worse off doesn’t
-seem to be any reason why they shouldn’t
-be better off. And&mdash;<em>it isn’t kind</em>.”</p>
-
-<p>“Kind?” Her brother looked at her
-blankly, and then, with a shout of laughter,
-“Lydia, you are as good as a play!
-No, my dear; I don’t run my mills for
-kindness.”</p>
-
-<p>“But,” she said, almost in a whisper,
-“whatsoever ye would that men should
-do unto you”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Blair made a gesture of disgust.</p>
-
-<p>“&mdash;oh, brother, I didn’t mean to find<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_118" id="Page_118">[118]</a></span>
-fault with you. Only with myself. I&mdash;I
-haven’t any right to spend money that
-I&mdash;don’t know about.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, anything more?” Robert Blair
-said, a little tired of her foolishness.
-“My dear, like the parson, you mean
-well; but you are a great goose!”</p>
-
-<p>As for his wife, she did not even answer
-Mrs. Eaton’s tremulous “good-night.”</p>
-
-
-<h3>V</h3>
-
-<p>The husband and wife looked at each
-other; then Robert Blair flung his head
-back with a laugh.</p>
-
-<p>“She is perfectly delicious!”</p>
-
-<p>“She is perfectly ungrateful, and I believe
-she means it.”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, nonsense! Lil hasn’t mind enough
-to mean anything; and I’ll tell you another
-thing: in spite of her quiet ways,
-she really has a good deal of worldly wisdom.
-She knows what it is to those two
-children to have me interested in them.
-Don’t worry your little head”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, I don’t worry,” she answered.
-“If she is going to presume to criticise<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_119" id="Page_119">[119]</a></span>
-you, I don’t want her under my roof; the
-sooner she leaves the better!”</p>
-
-<p>“Spitfire!” he told her, kissing her
-pretty hand, and forgetting all about his
-sister’s absurdity, and the strike, and the
-men and women shivering in the tenements
-down in the miserable mill town.</p>
-
-<p>But he remembered it all the next
-morning at the breakfast-table, for Lydia
-Eaton’s white face was too striking to
-escape comment. Mrs. Blair was not
-present, preferring to be, at what she
-called the “brutal hour of eight,” in her
-own room, with a tray and her maid and
-a novel.</p>
-
-<p>“What’s the matter?” Mr. Blair said
-kindly. “Are you ill, Lily?”</p>
-
-<p>“It’s what I told you last night, Robert,”
-she said nervously.</p>
-
-<p>The solemn Samuel, all ears, but looking
-perfectly deaf, brought a dish to his
-master’s elbow. Robert Blair closed his
-lips with a snap. Then he said,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Please make no reference to that
-folly before Eleanor.”</p>
-
-<p>But of course it was only a respite.
-The folly had to be repeated to Eleanor&mdash;discussed,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_120" id="Page_120">[120]</a></span>
-argued, denounced, until
-the whole atmosphere of the house was
-charged with excitement.</p>
-
-<p>Through it all Lydia Eaton came and
-went, and did her packing.</p>
-
-<p>“Well,” her sister-in-law said contemptuously,
-“perhaps you’ll tell me
-how you mean to <em>feed</em> Esther and Silas?
-You have a right to starve yourself, but
-I have some feeling for the children!”</p>
-
-<p>“I am going to work,” the other answered,
-trembling.</p>
-
-<p>“Lydia,” Mrs. Blair said passionately,
-“next to your ingratitude to your brother,
-I must say your selfishness in ruining
-your own children is the most dreadful
-thing I ever heard of!”</p>
-
-<p>But Mrs. Eaton’s preparations went
-on. Not that there was so much to do;
-but she had to find rooms, and then she
-had to find work. It was the latter exigency
-which fanned Robert Blair’s contemptuous
-annoyance, which refused to
-take the matter seriously, into sudden
-flames of rage, for his sister saw fit to
-apply at a shop for the position of saleswoman.
-Of course it came to his ears,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_121" id="Page_121">[121]</a></span>
-and that night the storm burst on Mrs.
-Eaton’s head. As for Robert Blair, when
-the interview was over, during which he
-spared Mrs. Eaton no detail of his furious
-mortification, he said savagely to his
-wife: “I wish you’d go and see if West
-cannot bring her to her senses. Get him
-to influence her to some decency. Tell
-him, if she’s set in this outrageous ingratitude,
-I wish he would persuade her
-to let me send her East, to some other
-place, and let her work (and starve!)
-where she won’t disgrace me. Think
-of it, Eleanor&mdash;that man Davis coming
-whining and grinning, and saying he
-‘would do what he could to give my
-sister a position as saleslady, but I knew
-the times were bad’! Damn him!”</p>
-
-<p>“Good heavens, Robert! You don’t
-mean to say she’s been to Davis’s? My
-dear, she is insane! Yes, I’ll go and see
-Mr. West to-morrow.”</p>
-
-<p>She went. It was a raw, bleak morning;
-the thin, chill winter rain blurred
-the windows of her brougham, and the
-mud splashed up against the glass; the
-wheels sunk into deep ruts of the badly<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_122" id="Page_122">[122]</a></span>
-paved streets, and the uncomfortable jolt
-and sway of the softly padded carriage
-added to her indignation at her sister-in-law.</p>
-
-<p>William West did not live in the new
-part of Mercer, with its somewhat gorgeous
-houses; nor yet in the old part,
-which was charming and dignified, and
-inclined to despise everything not itself;
-but in the middle section, near the rows
-of rotten and tumbling tenements, and
-within a stone’s throw of bleak and hideous
-brick blocks, known as “Company
-boarding-houses.” He had come here to
-live shortly after a certain crash in his
-own life; a personal blow, which left him
-harder, and more silent, and more earnest.
-He had been jilted, people said,
-and wondered why, for a while, and then
-forgot it, as he, absorbed in his work,
-seemed also to forget it.</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Blair, her fox-terrier under one
-arm, stepped out of the carriage, frowning
-to find herself in this squalid street;
-but once inside the big, plain, comfortable
-house where William West lived all by
-himself, her face relaxed and took a cer<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_123" id="Page_123">[123]</a></span>tain
-arch and charming discontent; there
-was a big fire blazing in the minister’s
-library, and the dignity and refinement
-of the room, the smell of leather-covered
-books, the gleam of pictures and bronzes,
-and a charming bit of tapestry hanging
-on the chimney-piece restored her sense
-of mental as well as physical comfort.
-When he entered, and dragged a big
-chair in front of the fire for her, and
-looked at her with that grave attention
-which seems like homage, and was part
-of the man, being called forth by his
-washerwoman as well as by Mrs. Robert
-Blair, she felt almost happy again, and
-assured that everything would come out
-right.</p>
-
-<p>“Mr. West,” she began, “you’ve got
-to help us; we’re in such absurd difficulties!
-Will you?”</p>
-
-<p>“Command me,” he said, smiling.</p>
-
-<p>“You haven’t heard, then? It’s
-Lydia&mdash;Mr. Blair’s sister, you know.
-She has taken it into her head that”&mdash;the
-color came into Mrs. Blair’s face&mdash;“that
-she won’t let Robert support her,
-because she thinks he isn’t treating the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_124" id="Page_124">[124]</a></span>
-strikers properly. I’m sure I don’t
-know what idea she has! But she won’t
-accept his money. Did you ever hear of
-such a thing?”</p>
-
-<p>William West’s face sobered instantly.
-“I have not seen Mrs. Eaton for a fortnight,”
-he said; “I had no idea”&mdash;He
-got up, frowning, the lines about his lips
-perplexed and anxious.</p>
-
-<p>“I’m sure,” the pretty woman went
-on, growing angrier as she spoke, “I
-don’t care what <em>she</em> does,&mdash;I’ve lost all
-patience with her,&mdash;but to throw the
-children’s future away! And it’s so
-embarrassing for Robert.” Then she
-told him fully the whole situation. “She
-keeps saying,” Mrs. Blair ended, “that
-‘Mr. Eaton’ wouldn’t have allowed the
-children to be supported on money that
-‘<em>wasn’t good</em>.’ Did you ever hear such
-impertinence?”</p>
-
-<p>“Ah, well,” he protested good-naturedly,
-“I’m sure Mrs. Eaton does not
-mean to be impertinent; and I’m sure
-she does appreciate her brother’s kindness.
-Only, she is trying to work out a
-great problem on an individual basis,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_125" id="Page_125">[125]</a></span>
-which is of course very foolish. But the
-dear little lady must not be allowed&mdash;And
-yet”&mdash;He paused, frowning and
-perplexed.</p>
-
-<p>“Ah, but, Mr. West, when she has the
-assurance to quote the Bible to her own
-brother&mdash;it seems to me that’s rather
-impertinent? Fancy! something about
-‘doing unto others’&mdash;and ‘being partaker’
-if she spent the money that had
-been ‘wrung from the strikers.’ Upon
-my word! ‘Wrung!’ As I said to my
-husband, ‘Upon my word, I never heard
-of such a thing.’”</p>
-
-<p>“Neither did I,” William West said
-dryly. “We are all of us in the habit of
-taking our dividends, and not looking at
-the way they are earned. Mrs. Eaton is
-certainly unusual.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, do you think you can influence
-her?” Mrs. Blair insisted. “I don’t
-mean to stay with us; I don’t think that
-would be possible or desirable now. But
-to let Mr. Blair give her an allowance, so
-that she can take care of the children.
-It is positively wicked to think how she
-is ruining the children!”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_126" id="Page_126">[126]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“Won’t she take any money from
-your husband?”</p>
-
-<p>“Not a cent, if you please! Not a
-penny. She keeps saying that if she
-can’t feel that the source of the money
-is all right, she can’t spend it.” Mrs.
-Blair cuffed her dog prettily with her
-muff, and kissed his little sleek head.
-“Isn’t she a goose, Pat, you darling?”</p>
-
-<p>“Her principle would turn the world
-upside down,” the clergyman said.</p>
-
-<p>“That’s just what I say!” cried Mrs.
-Blair.</p>
-
-<p>“If we all said we would have nothing
-to do with the ‘blood of the just person,’
-what would become of the railroads and
-the coal-mines and the oil trusts? What
-would become of our dividends from industrial
-stocks if we insisted on knowing
-that the workmen were honestly paid?
-How could we eat meat, if we looked
-into the slaughter-house?”</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Blair looked puzzled.</p>
-
-<p>“And she is going to work for her
-living?” He was profoundly moved.
-“Good heavens, out of the mouths of
-babes! What a primitive expression of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_127" id="Page_127">[127]</a></span>
-social responsibility! But surely, Mrs.
-Blair, we must respect her honesty? As
-for her judgment, that’s another matter.”</p>
-
-<p>Eleanor Blair’s blank astonishment left
-her speechless for a moment; then she
-flung up her head haughtily.</p>
-
-<p>“Mr. West, do you mean to say”&mdash;she
-began.</p>
-
-<p>“My dear Mrs. Blair,” he said quietly,
-“I mean to say that little Mrs. Eaton, in
-her simple way, puts her finger right on
-the centre of this whole miserable question,
-in which, directly or indirectly, we
-are all involved: she has recognized our
-complicity. Of course she is going to
-work the wrong way&mdash;at least, I suppose
-she is. God knows! But what courage,&mdash;what
-directness!”</p>
-
-<p>“Do I understand,” Eleanor Blair said,
-rising, “that you approve of my sister-in-law’s
-extraordinary conduct?”</p>
-
-<p>“I approve of <em>her</em>,” he said, smiling.
-“If you ask me whether I think she is
-doing right, I should say ‘Yes,’ because
-she is acting upon her conscience. Is
-she doing wisely? No; because civilization
-is compromise. We have either got<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_128" id="Page_128">[128]</a></span>
-to bow in the House of Rimmon, or go
-and live in the woods like Thoreau and
-eat dried peas. I’ll tell her so, if you
-want me to. But as for attempting to
-influence her, I cannot do that. The
-place whereon we stand is holy ground.”</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Blair picked up her dog and set
-her teeth; then she looked slightly beyond
-the clergyman, with half-shut eyes,
-and said,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Will you be good enough to have my
-carriage called?”</p>
-
-
-<h3>VI</h3>
-
-<p>“I never would have been brave
-enough,” Mrs. Eaton said meekly to
-Mr. West, when the dreadful step was
-actually taken, “I never could have done
-it, but I knew Mr. Eaton would have
-wished it; and, besides, I felt I was taking
-the food of those poor people.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, no,” he began, “that is really
-not reasonable”&mdash;But he stopped;
-this timid creature could not reason&mdash;she
-could only feel. “Fools,” he said to
-himself, as he left her, “rush in where<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_129" id="Page_129">[129]</a></span>
-the political economist fears to tread.
-She is a fool, poor little soul, but”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>The winter had passed heavily away.
-Mrs. Eaton had succeeded in getting a
-place in Mr. Davis’s shop&mdash;“where,” the
-proprietor used to say, “having Robert
-Blair’s sister for a saleslady is money in
-my pocket! She’s better than a ‘fire-and-water
-bargain sale.’” So she stood
-behind a counter and sold ribbon, and
-was stared at and whispered about. But
-she had very keen anxieties about food
-and clothes, and the children’s discontent
-lay like a weight upon the mother’s
-heart&mdash;which ached, too, with the pain
-of the second wrench from the affection
-and kindness of her family. Fortunately
-her peculiar logic did not lead her to
-reject the Baptist deacon’s money, which
-was certainly much more doubtful than
-her brother’s. By some mental process
-of her own, the fact that she worked for
-it seemed to make its acceptance moral.
-She had no leisure now to work for Mr.
-West; but the remembrance of his patience
-and gentleness always made a little
-pause of peace in her heavy thoughts.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_130" id="Page_130">[130]</a></span>
-It was a hard, bleak life for this silent
-little creature; and the rector of St.
-James, himself a silent soul, watched her
-live it, and pondered many things.</p>
-
-<p>The strike had broken in February.
-The men went back to their work&mdash;defeat,
-like some bitter wind, blowing the
-flames of resentment into fiercer heat,
-which “next time” would mean destroying
-victory.</p>
-
-<p>“Will it be like Samson pulling down
-the temple upon himself?” William
-West wondered, depressed and hopeless.</p>
-
-<p>It was night&mdash;a summer night; sweet
-and still over in the old-fashioned part of
-Mercer, where the fragrance of roses
-overflowed the high brick walls of the
-gardens. Here in the mill district it was
-not sweet, and all night long the mills
-roared and crashed, and the flames bursting
-out of vast chimneys flared and faded,
-and flared again.</p>
-
-<p>William West was alone in his library.
-His sermon for the next morning had
-been finished early in the week; he had
-looked it over the last thing, and now the
-manuscript was slipped into its black vel<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_131" id="Page_131">[131]</a></span>vet
-cover. He sat, his head on his hand,
-tapping with strong, restless fingers the
-arm of his chair. The old question, always
-more or less present in the mind of
-this man, was clamoring for an answer:
-How far are we responsible? Through
-how many hands must dishonest money,
-cruel money, mean money, pass to be
-cleansed? Is it clean when it comes to
-me&mdash;this dividend or that? Shall a man,
-or a railroad, or a trust deal iniquitously
-with one of these little ones, and I profit
-by it? Shall I trace my dollar to its
-source, and find it wet with tears and
-blood, and reject it? Or shall I decline to
-trace it, and buy my bread in innocence?
-Even the chief priests refused the thirty
-pieces of silver! Am I an accomplice?
-For that matter, is the Christian Church
-an accomplice? What does it say to the
-philanthropy of thieves? Priests used to
-take toll from the plunder of robbers,
-and say mass for their souls in return.
-Nowadays&mdash;“I cover my eyes, but I
-hold out my hand,” he said to himself.</p>
-
-<p>Well&mdash;well! The Reverend William
-West, in his way, was doubtless as great<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_132" id="Page_132">[132]</a></span>
-a fool in asking unprofitable questions
-as was Lydia Eaton. That the existing
-order would be turned upside down by
-the introduction of the sense of personal
-responsibility there can be no doubt.
-Such an introduction would be the application
-to the complex egotism of the
-nineteenth century of the doctrines of a
-Galilean peasant, who was a communist
-and the Saviour of the world. It would
-be the setting forth in individual lives of
-the spirit of Jesus Christ, the most revolutionary
-element that could possibly be
-introduced into society. We are none of
-us ready for that.</p>
-
-<p>At least William West was not ready;
-he had no intention of making himself
-ridiculous, no matter if he did ask himself
-unanswerable questions; he was not
-ready to throw away present opportunities
-and destroy his influence. Yet, as
-for Mrs. Eaton&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Talk about martyrs!” he said to
-himself, as he sat there at midnight
-thinking of her, of her hard life, of her
-splendid foolishness.</p>
-
-<p>“Well, there is one thing I could do<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_133" id="Page_133">[133]</a></span>
-for her. Why not? Good God, how selfish
-I am! I suppose she would think my
-money was clean? Yes, I could at least
-do <em>that</em>.”</p>
-
-<p>This was no new thought. It had
-been in his mind more or less for months.
-He only faced it that night more strenuously.</p>
-
-<p>So it came about that by and by he
-rose, his face set, his mouth hard. He
-took a key from his watch chain, and
-opened a little closet in the side of the
-chimney, and took out a box. He laid it
-on the table, and again sat down in his
-revolving chair, and stared blankly ahead
-of him. Then he opened it. There were
-some letters in it, and a picture, and a
-crumbling bunch of flowers that looked
-as though they had once been pansies;
-he held them in his hand, a bitter sort of
-amusement in his eyes. The letters he
-put aside, as though their touch stung
-him. At the photograph he looked long
-and intently. Then he bent the card over
-in his hand, and it broke across the middle.
-Hastily he gathered these things together
-and went over to his fireplace. A<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_134" id="Page_134">[134]</a></span>
-fire had been laid during the cold spring
-rains, and the logs were dry and dusty.
-At the touch of a match, they sputtered
-and broke into a little roaring flame.
-William West put his handful of letters
-and the flowers and the picture gently
-down in the midst of it, and then stood
-and watched them burn. When there was
-only a white film left, on which the sparks
-ran back, widening and dying, he went
-over to his desk, and with a certain strong
-and satisfied cheerfulness he began to
-write:&mdash;</p>
-
-<div class="blockquot">
-
-<p><span class="smcap">My dear Mrs. Eaton</span>,&mdash;You and
-I have spoken more than once of your
-action in leaving your brother’s house,
-and you know, I am sure, how profoundly
-I honor and respect your courage in acting
-upon your convictions. It is this respect
-which I am venturing to offer you
-in asking you to honor me by becoming
-my wife. My sincere regard and appreciation
-have been yours ever since I first
-knew you, and if you will consent to
-make a home for yourself and the children
-in my house, it will be a home for<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_135" id="Page_135">[135]</a></span>
-me, and you know what that will be for
-a lonely man. If you will consent, I shall
-be always,</p>
-
-<p>
-<span class="pad4">Faithfully yours,</span><br />
-<span class="pad10 smcap">William West</span>.</p>
-</div>
-
-<p>As he folded the sheet of paper and
-thrust it into the envelope there was a
-whimsical look in his eyes.</p>
-
-<p>“A <em>love</em>-letter!” he said to himself;
-but his face was very gentle and tender.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>However, the answer to the letter was
-all that the most ardent lover could desire.</p>
-
-
- <div class="chapter"></div>
-<hr class="chap" />
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_136" id="Page_136">[136]</a></span></p>
-
-<h2><a name="COUNTING_THE_COST" id="COUNTING_THE_COST"></a><a href="#CONTENTS">COUNTING THE COST</a></h2>
-
-
-<h3>I</h3>
-
-<div><img class="drop-cap" src="images/i_141.jpg" width="60" alt="" /></div>
-<p class="drop-cap">ANNIE GRAHAM, the young
-woman with whom this story
-concerns itself, lived in a Western
-manufacturing town. Her home was,
-both inside and outside, like hundreds
-and thousands of other American homes,
-a cheap frame house, in a cheap, respectable
-suburb; a house without any other
-beauty or refinement than cleanliness
-and a certain amount of rather coarse
-comfort. Her father was a workingman,
-as his father had been before him. He
-was a gasfitter, and went to his work
-every morning with a greasy leather bundle
-under his arm, and a cheerful heart
-in his breast. First, because he had
-plenty of work and, having no imagination,
-never worried about the future.
-But mostly because of a comfortable fact<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_137" id="Page_137">[137]</a></span>
-to which, when not occupied with the
-practical details of his trade, he devoted
-his thoughts; the fact being that there
-was a certain tidy bit of money in the
-bank for his Annie,&mdash;money which he
-had hoarded up, little by little, saved out
-of car-fares, and tobacco, and clothes;
-money which meant privation and courage,
-and slow, persistent, heavy toil. It
-amounted to a little over fifteen hundred
-dollars, and he hoped it would
-be twenty-five hundred before he died.
-What Annie would do with it when he
-was gone was the only direction in which
-Johnny Graham’s fancy worked. Would
-she rent a better house, maybe, than this
-little one they had lived in since she was
-twelve; or would she get herself fine
-clothes or a piano or books? He thought
-that she would probably get books. Annie
-was so fond of reading! He was very
-proud of this fondness for reading, and
-used to tell his fellow-workmen about it,
-and say he had seen her turn over so
-many pages, in fifteen minutes by his
-watch. He timed her, he said, and my!
-but she was the fast reader! He had no<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_138" id="Page_138">[138]</a></span>
-idea of placing any restrictions upon the
-way in which she should spend her inheritance
-when she got it; he had no
-feeling about the money as anything but
-a means of future pleasure to Annie.</p>
-
-<p>“When I’m dead and gone, the afternoon,
-maybe, of the funeral, they’ll tell
-her. ‘Annie Graham,’ the lawyer’ll say,
-‘your father’s left you a tidy bit of
-money. It’s twenty-five hundred dollars,’
-he’ll say; well, maybe it’ll be twenty-six
-hundred,&mdash;well, say three thousand.
-‘Miss Graham,’ he’ll say, ‘here’s three
-thousand dollars.’ Well, Annie’ll jump.
-An’ it’ll comfort her,” Annie’s father
-would think many times a day, smiling,
-and screwing in his gas-fixtures with his
-blackened fingers, or scratching a match
-on his trousers, and hunting for leaks.</p>
-
-<p>He had been father and mother to his
-little girl ever since his wife died, when
-Annie was five. He had baked and
-scrubbed and cleaned for them both
-when she was a child, and in his clumsy
-way he had sewed on buttons and darned
-rents and washed her little face and
-hands as tenderly as a woman could have<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_139" id="Page_139">[139]</a></span>
-done. And when she grew into a big
-girl and went to the grammar school, he
-still knew all about her hats and clothes;
-and he still tried to save her pretty
-hands, and sifted the ashes, and waited
-on her, and was proud of her just as he
-always had been. There was more than
-one hard-working woman neighbor who
-would have been willing to “make a good
-stepmother” to Annie, and who felt, in
-all honesty, that the gasfitter was spoiling
-his girl, and that she just only hoped
-nothing bad would come of it.</p>
-
-<p>“Them girls that’s taken such care of,&mdash;well,
-the dear only knows what happens
-to them!” the neighbors said, with
-mysterious pursings of the lips. But so
-far nothing out of the way had happened
-to Annie. Nothing “bad” had come of
-the simple, faithful loving that the child
-had had.</p>
-
-<p>Annie was eighteen. She was a fresh-looking
-girl, with an intelligent face,
-though a little serious for her years. Her
-placid gray eyes had a rather absent look
-sometimes, and there was a line on her
-white forehead that told of thought.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_140" id="Page_140">[140]</a></span>
-Johnny Graham knew what that line
-meant. He knew with what intensity
-Annie had applied herself to her studies
-when she was in school, and how, after
-she had graduated, and had gotten a place
-as a “saleslady,” as Johnny expressed it,
-she still worked and toiled over her books
-whenever she could find time.</p>
-
-<p>“But she’s mostly figurin’,” he told
-his friends proudly.</p>
-
-<p>That Annie, at eighteen, had taught
-herself geometry, and had yearnings for
-the higher calculus, was a matter of
-burning pride to the gasfitter, though he
-had no idea what it was all about.</p>
-
-<p>“I suppose now, Annie, you know all
-there is in the arithmetics on them subjects?”
-he said to her one night as he
-sat in his shirt-sleeves smoking his pipe
-by the kitchen stove, and looking at his
-daughter, who, with her pencil pressed
-against her lips, was frowning over a
-sheet of calculations. Annie gave a little
-start and looked up smiling.</p>
-
-<p>“Why, father, dear, I don’t know anything&mdash;comparatively.”</p>
-
-<p>“But, Annie, now what’s the good of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_141" id="Page_141">[141]</a></span>
-them lines? Do you cut patterns on ’em?
-I seen a advertisement saying they’d
-show you how to cut out dresses on a
-chart. And there was a lot of them
-lines drawed on it.”</p>
-
-<p>Annie came over and sat on his knee;
-she laughed, but she sighed, too.</p>
-
-<p>“No; it’s just working them out that
-I like,” she said. “I guess I like studying;
-that’s it.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, you’re a real student, I guess,”
-he told her, and passed his rough, grimy
-hand over her soft hair. “Did I pull
-your hair?” he said, for it seemed as
-though she winced; but she only answered
-by taking his hand and kissing
-it, which made her father protest, and
-then cuddle her up in his arms and say,
-“Well, now, Annie, I think you’re a real
-scholar.”</p>
-
-<p>They sat in the kitchen, but not because
-they had not a parlor, like everybody
-else. There was a best room behind
-the kitchen, and upstairs two bedrooms,
-and above them an attic, rented to Dave
-Duggan, a steady young workman who
-had lodged with them for nearly a year.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_142" id="Page_142">[142]</a></span>
-Of course, obviously&mdash;propinquity being
-the root of love&mdash;he had a tenderness
-for Annie; and he was referred to by
-the women who were not Annie’s stepmothers
-as her “feller.” The parlor, in
-which the gasfitter rarely sat, was as
-frankly ugly as the outside of the small,
-narrow frame house. It had been furnished
-according to Mrs. Graham’s taste,
-and it had been religiously unchanged
-since her death. The tapestry carpet, with
-its monstrous roses and broad green
-leaves, had worn and faded into inoffensiveness,
-and the red rep furniture had
-suffered the same kindly change; but the
-knitted tidies were new, and the plush
-picture frames; and Annie had added the
-knots of china silk on the chair-backs;
-and on the wall there was a snow-shovel,
-painted and gilded and tied with pink
-satin ribbons, and also some decorated
-brass placques; on the mantelpiece were
-two little wooden shoes,&mdash;Dave Duggan’s
-gift,&mdash;gilded and adorned with blue satin
-bows, and used as match-boxes.</p>
-
-<p>To Johnny Graham this terrible parlor
-stood for art and luxury. As for Annie,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_143" id="Page_143">[143]</a></span>
-she did not know enough to find the
-snow-shovel painful, nor even the rolling-pin,
-another gift from Dave, which, covered
-with plush, hung from one corner
-of the mantelpiece. She merely thought
-of these things as “mother’s” and as
-“presents,” and valued them accordingly.
-But she would never have dreamed of occupying
-this fine room unless there was
-company; and, indeed, the kitchen was
-far more homelike.</p>
-
-<p>She sat now nestling down against her
-father’s shoulder, listening to his story
-of the day’s work: the fine house on the
-hill where he had gone to mend a fixture;
-the nice young lady he had seen;
-and the toilet-table all covered with silver
-things.</p>
-
-<p>“Why, Annie, now I tell you, there was
-brushes and combs made out of silver;
-and there was five little sorts of silver
-boxes, different sizes and shapes, hearts
-and rounds mostly. Didn’t seem to have
-nothing in ’em. I had to move ’em to
-get at the bracket. What do you suppose
-folks has such things for? Now a
-brush made out o’ silver is no sense;<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_144" id="Page_144">[144]</a></span>
-it’s heavy. Annie, now, would you like
-things like that?”</p>
-
-<p>“Indeed, I wouldn’t,” she said. “Think
-of the trouble they’d be to keep clean.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, the help does that in them
-houses, I suppose,” he ruminated. “Annie,
-now, suppose you had a lot of money,
-would you buy them things?”</p>
-
-<p>“Indeed, I wouldn’t!” Annie said
-again, laughing. “No, I know what I’d
-do. I heard a girl talking about it.
-There’s a college for girls somewhere
-in the East, just like there is for young
-men. I would go to that college and
-study. My! wouldn’t I study!”</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>That was the beginning of what some
-people called the tragedy of Annie Graham’s
-life, and some the success&mdash;it all
-depends on how you look at it.</p>
-
-<p>Her chance remark about a girl’s college
-lingered in her father’s thoughts;
-Johnny Graham had not known that
-there were such things as women’s colleges.
-There were primary schools and
-high schools and “pay” schools, where
-he supposed the swells sent their chil<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_145" id="Page_145">[145]</a></span>dren,
-but his knowledge never went farther
-than this.</p>
-
-<p>“A college for girls!” Well, why
-not? He believed girls was smarter
-than boys any day in the year; anyway
-his Annie was. He thought about it constantly,
-when, to save something for that
-inheritance in the bank, he walked to
-and from his work; and he thought of it
-while he worked. He spoke of it, when
-he had the chance, in a tentative way to
-two or three persons for whom he was
-doing jobs of gasfitting. Did they ever
-hear anything of them girls’ colleges?
-What was they like? Did they cost
-money? Once, in the big morning-room
-of an old-fashioned house, he spoke to
-an old lady who sat by the fire while he
-screwed a lava tip on the burner over
-the mantelpiece. She was an old woman
-and rich, and so she ought to know about
-such things, Johnny Graham reasoned;
-so, with the respectful guilelessness of
-the American workman, he cleared his
-throat and said, he wondered, now, if she
-was knowing anything about girls’ colleges?</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_146" id="Page_146">[146]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>The old woman started, and seemed to
-see him for the first time, and put on her
-glasses to inspect him.</p>
-
-<p>“What did you say, my good man?”
-she inquired.</p>
-
-<p>Johnny, unoffended by this offensive
-term, which means, “you are not so good
-as I am,” repeated his question mumblingly,
-with the old lava tip between his
-lips.</p>
-
-<p>“I have a girl I’m thinking of sending
-to one of them institutions,” he explained.</p>
-
-<p>The old lady frowned and took off her
-glasses and tapped them on the arm of
-her chair.</p>
-
-<p>“You will make a great mistake, my
-good man. It is a great mistake to educate
-your daughter above her position.”</p>
-
-<p>Johnny took the lava tip out of his
-mouth and stared at her.</p>
-
-<p>“Well, now, ma’am,” he said in his
-slow way, “I don’t see how you make
-that out. An American girl is an American
-girl; no matter how you look at it.
-You can’t educate her above that.”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_147" id="Page_147">[147]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>Upon which the old lady nodded her
-head and said: “Yes, yes; of course;
-this is what I’ve always said; this is
-what we are coming to!”</p>
-
-<p>And Johnny Graham rolled up his
-tools in his greasy leather apron, and
-went home, pondering deeply. He was
-not in the least angry at the old lady; he
-was simply incapable of understanding
-her. But that night he thought it over,
-and pointed out to himself that, after all,
-if Annie’s mind was set that way, there
-was no use in her waiting to spend her
-money till he was dead and gone.</p>
-
-<p>“I’ll probably be livin’ twenty years
-yet,” he thought, after some calculation,
-“and Annie maybe would be too old for
-a girls’ college then. She’d better go
-now; and anyway it might be a good
-investment of the money; she might
-set up as a teacher, maybe, after she got
-learned. They do say Councilman Welch’s
-daughter got four hundred dollars for
-teachin’ in the Primary School; and
-that’s twenty per cent. interest on two
-thousand dollars; I believe it’s a good
-thing!”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_148" id="Page_148">[148]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>It was then that Annie came in, looking,
-it chanced, a little pale, and, perhaps,
-a little wistful. Annie was not discontented;
-she had no aspirations; only the
-child was vaguely aware of an emptiness
-in her life. And she had stopped at the
-Public Library as she came home from
-her work, and had read an article in a
-magazine concerning a College for Women
-in another State.</p>
-
-<p>“That’s what I’d do if I were rich,” she
-thought, as she walked home. “I’d go
-there and study.”</p>
-
-<p>So she was a little absent, even when
-she kissed her father, and heard him
-tell all about the big house where the
-rich old woman lived all by herself, because
-she had quarreled with her only
-daughter.</p>
-
-<p>“Seems strange, now, to quarrel with
-your children,” said Johnny, buttering
-his bread on the tablecloth, and then,
-tilting his chair back, eating it with great
-contentment.</p>
-
-<p>After supper he told Annie what he
-had planned for her. Her amazement at
-her father’s wealth was almost as keen a<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_149" id="Page_149">[149]</a></span>
-delight to Johnny as was her impetuous
-refusal to use it, and her tears because
-he was “so good” to her; almost as
-keen a joy as her final yielding to the
-logic of his urging, that, after all, the
-family would be better off if she could
-teach, and earn a big salary. “Six hundred
-dollars, maybe,” he said, stretching
-his imagination for the purpose of convincing
-her.</p>
-
-<p>So it was arranged. Annie Graham
-was to go away to study; she was to fit
-herself to be a teacher; she was to be
-educated into her father’s intellectual superior;
-she was to be raised “above her
-station.” Would it be a failure or a success?
-Would she be happy or most
-miserable? Would the little dull, loving,
-ignorant gasfitter hold or lose his
-girl?</p>
-
-<p>Well, it all depends upon how you look
-at it.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>The result of the talk that night was
-that in September Annie took the long
-and expensive journey East, and entered
-on her four years’ course of study.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_150" id="Page_150">[150]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>Of course, there was no coming home
-for the holidays; the fifteen hundred
-dollars in the bank could not stand that;
-nor did she have to come back in the
-long vacation, which would have been a
-serious expense, for the president of the
-college, who was greatly impressed by
-the girl’s ability and character, permitted
-her to live in one of the college houses
-during the summer, and found for her an
-opportunity to teach some little children.
-She earned enough money to pay her
-board during those twelve weeks, and did
-not have to draw on the cherished bank
-account.</p>
-
-<p>The beginning of that college life was
-a strange experience to Annie,&mdash;the
-quiet, refined atmosphere, the beauty of
-culture, the conception of spaciousness
-and dignity, and the awaking of that
-sense of fitness which is called conventionality.
-To Annie these things
-were like the opening of the eyes of one
-born blind. By degrees the small niceties
-of life revealed themselves to her,&mdash;the
-delicacies of serving, the delicacies of living,
-the delicacies of manner and voice<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_151" id="Page_151">[151]</a></span>
-and thought. She felt them all with a
-passionate sort of joy.</p>
-
-<p>It is curious to observe that by the
-pure and virgin mind these things, which
-may be so worthless in their lifeless formality,
-are seen in their real and fundamental
-nobility, and are accepted with
-the instinct of religion. At first Annie
-was so normally unconscious of her antecedents
-that it did not occur to her to
-proclaim that all these things were new.
-And then, by and by, having eaten of
-this tree of the knowledge of good and
-evil, there came to her a certain deep
-spiritual experience; she recognized that
-the root of conventionality, the beginning
-of the sense of fitness, lay in character;
-therefore she knew no shame that her
-father ate with his knife, or sat in his
-shirt-sleeves, or did many unlovely things.
-She did not like them; but she knew no
-shame, only love. But it was then that,
-very simply, she took occasion to say that
-her father, who was a mechanic, had sent
-her here to college, so that she might be
-fitted to support herself by teaching.
-She said this because she recognized an<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_152" id="Page_152">[152]</a></span>other
-point of view, and, recognizing it,
-felt a certain lack of straightforwardness
-in keeping silent; and also because she
-was proud of Johnny Graham. Then
-she forgot it. It was too unimportant to
-think of.</p>
-
-<p>She assimilated all these new ideas,
-and felt them and lived them, as though
-she had been to the manner born. Her
-very face reflected them. She was almost
-a beautiful young woman. Her
-deep eyes looked out from under her
-straight, pure brows with a certain high
-directness of glance and tranquil self-poise
-which gave a sense of breeding
-which was inescapable. The fact that
-she had said that she was poor was only
-in its way another proof of her superiority&mdash;so
-some of the college-girls said,
-who went into schoolgirl ecstasies about
-her.</p>
-
-<p>“You know it’s vulgar to be rich,” a
-young man told her one evening, as they
-talked together in the June dusk. It
-was Annie’s fifth year, and for the first
-time she was going home in the long
-vacation. A scholarship, and four sum<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_153" id="Page_153">[153]</a></span>mers
-of teaching some little children in
-a country house on the outskirts of the
-village, had meant that for the last two
-years Johnny Graham’s bank account
-had been recuperating, a very, very little;
-at all events, there had been no drain
-upon it.</p>
-
-<p>And now Annie was going home. She
-had won the highest honors of her class,
-and had even been offered a position on
-the college staff, and her happiness was
-as frank as a child’s.</p>
-
-<p>“In so many weeks I’ll see father.
-In so many days!”&mdash;she kept saying
-to herself. And now it had come to
-Saturday evening, and she was to start
-home on Monday. She was walking
-back from her little pupils’ house, where
-she had said good-by until September.
-She was not alone.</p>
-
-<p>A certain Dick Temple, a cousin of
-her pupils’ mother, had a way of running
-down from town to spend Sundays with
-the Pauls, to play, he said, with the children,
-and get in some rowing on the river,
-and to exercise his cousin John’s polo
-ponies, and&mdash;to see Annie Graham.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_154" id="Page_154">[154]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>But this last was not so stated in the
-bond.</p>
-
-<p>He had a way of appearing in time to
-walk across the campus with her, after
-little Kate’s music lesson Saturday afternoon,
-and once or twice he had beguiled
-her into his boat, and they had gone
-floating down the river in the twilight,
-talking of everything in heaven and earth.
-Being young, religion had been their first
-theme; and then, by and by, love;&mdash;in
-the abstract, of course. A month ago,
-they both had feared themselves incapable
-of experiencing this beautiful emotion&mdash;Annie,
-because she was going to
-devote herself to study and her father;
-Dick, because he had outlived such
-things, and was very bitter and cynical
-and mysterious in his allusions to life,
-which, he said, “he knew.” Sometimes
-they talked of their future; and it was
-then that Annie had told him, smiling,
-that she had no such luxurious prospects
-as those which he had been outlining for
-himself,&mdash;travel, and study, and the philanthropic
-opportunities of great wealth.</p>
-
-<p>They were walking slowly along under<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_155" id="Page_155">[155]</a></span>
-the great elms toward her door; it had
-rained earlier in the day, and the worn
-bricks of the narrow pavement held here
-and there shallow pools of water; the sun
-struck across the wet grass in a low flood
-of gold; and there was the scent of young
-leaves and roses in the air.</p>
-
-<p>“We are poor people,” Annie had
-said, with an amused look; “I’m going
-to teach school and wear spectacles, and
-be very stern and learned.”</p>
-
-<p>“Ah, well,” returned the young man,
-“it’s the thing to be poor nowadays;
-it’s awfully vulgar to be rich! It’s
-queer, now, when you think of it, Miss
-Graham, how many people in our class
-have lost their money, isn’t it?”</p>
-
-<p>“We’ve never had it to lose,” Annie
-said; “the family fortunes are to rise
-on school-teaching.”</p>
-
-<p>Dick glanced at her with quick admiration
-in his handsome young eyes. He
-was twenty-four, but he blundered over
-his words like a schoolboy.</p>
-
-<p>“Miss Graham,” he said, “you won’t
-mind if I say I think it’s awfully fine in
-you, don’t you know, to teach, and all<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_156" id="Page_156">[156]</a></span>
-that sort of thing? Of course, girls do
-things now. I mean nice girls, don’t
-you know. Why, cousin Kate gave
-music lessons before she married; and
-she was a Townsend. Still, it’s people
-like that, don’t you know, that can afford
-to do things like that!”</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t suppose any one can afford
-to be dependent,” Annie said simply,
-“and my father is really poor, Mr. Temple.”</p>
-
-<p>Her beautiful direct look as she said
-this made the young fellow’s heart suddenly
-leap. He wanted to burst out and
-tell her how much he admired her;
-admired? no, loved her! That was the
-word. Yes, he, who had thought he had
-outlived all that sort of thing. All in a
-moment he felt that he wanted to tell her
-this; but she seemed so remote that he
-dared not speak.</p>
-
-<p>“I suppose I ought to get my governor
-to go and call on hers,” he reflected;
-“these decayed gentlefolks are death on
-propriety. But maybe she wouldn’t look
-at me, anyway,” he added to himself, in
-a miserable afterthought; for she began<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_157" id="Page_157">[157]</a></span>
-to speak in such an interested way of
-some mathematical work she had to do
-that night, that he felt there was no
-room for him in her thoughts. He left
-her at the college door and went back,
-ardent and despairing, to confide in his
-cousin Kate, who, it must be admitted,
-had rather a startled expression when he
-told her he was “all bowled over by Miss
-Graham.”</p>
-
-<p>“But, Dick, what would your father
-say if it got serious? Cousin Henry has
-such ideas, you know. She’s a charming
-girl, but we don’t know anything
-about her people.”</p>
-
-<p>“We know they are poor,” Dick said
-boldly; “but that doesn’t matter in the
-least. Surely you are not so narrow,
-Cousin Kate, as to think it matters?”</p>
-
-<p>“No, that doesn’t matter, of course,”
-cousin Kate said doubtfully.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>As for Annie, she went, smiling a little,
-and blushing a little, upstairs to her room.
-But she did no work in higher mathematics
-that night.</p>
-
-<p>Instead, she finished her packing, and<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_158" id="Page_158">[158]</a></span>
-wrote her last semi-weekly letter of the
-term to her father. To be sure, he would
-get it just a day or two before she came
-herself; but she would not have had
-Johnny Graham miss that Saturday letter
-for a good deal. She knew he would carry
-it about in his pocket, and read it over and
-over, and put it on the wooden chair beside
-his bed at night. Perhaps it was a
-little more affectionate, this last letter,
-than usual; she told him about the
-weather, and that she would start on
-Monday, and would telegraph him when
-to expect her. And something of the
-progress of her two pupils; and how she
-had made an experiment in the laboratory,
-and had burned her fingers; and&mdash;and
-that she had met an interesting man,
-a cousin of Mrs. Paul’s. He had taken
-her out rowing once or twice, she said.
-And, oh! she was so happy that she
-was coming home! She could hardly
-believe that it was true, she was so glad.
-And then she said she was always his
-little girl who loved him&mdash;“Annie.”</p>
-
-<p>Then when it was written, she put her
-head down on her arms, folded upon her<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_159" id="Page_159">[159]</a></span>
-writing-table; there were tears in her eyes
-when she lifted it again.</p>
-
-<p>“When he said ‘our class,’ ought I
-to have spoken?” she asked herself.
-“No, he must know; I told Mrs. Paul.
-No, no, I couldn’t!” And all her love
-and all her pride for her father rebelled
-against the slight to him which such a
-confession would have been; it would
-have seemed to imply that he was less
-gentle in soul than Richard Temple himself,
-or any one else.</p>
-
-<p>Mr. Temple saw her at church the
-next day and walked home with her;
-although she kept all the while on Mrs.
-Paul’s right, while Dick had to walk on
-the outside and could only look across at
-her, which did not please him in the least.
-She did not talk to him very much, but
-she seemed to have a good deal to say to
-his cousin, which perplexed her adorer,
-for though he had a proper regard for the
-stout and estimable Mrs. Paul, he could
-not see why Miss Graham should talk to
-her with such apparent interest, when an
-intelligent young man was really eager
-for a look or a word. He heard her<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_160" id="Page_160">[160]</a></span>
-laughing a little about going home “like
-a stranger and foreigner,” she said.</p>
-
-<p>“I haven’t seen South Bend for nearly
-five years; you know it is such an expensive
-journey.”</p>
-
-<p>Mrs. Paul said yes, she supposed it
-was. “It takes four days and five nights
-to get there, doesn’t it? It seems to me
-I passed through it once. I suppose
-those Western places are very progressive,
-aren’t they? They are not shocked
-at the idea of a university education for
-women. One runs up against that here
-very often.”</p>
-
-<p>Annie shook her head, smiling. “Isn’t
-it funny to think that people do really
-feel that it is unfeminine; ‘threatening to
-the womanly woman,’ as they say.”</p>
-
-<p>“I’ve come to think that the ‘womanly
-woman’ means the brainless woman,”
-Mrs. Paul said.</p>
-
-<p>“What fools people are who feel that
-way about the higher education of women,”
-Dick broke in. “It’s incredible!
-Miss Graham, I shall be passing through
-South Bend in a fortnight or so; may I
-call?”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_161" id="Page_161">[161]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“Of course; I shall be delighted to see
-you,” Annie said, “and my father will be
-so glad to see any friend of Mrs. Paul’s;
-he knows how kind you have been to
-me,” she ended, with an affectionate look
-at Dick’s cousin.</p>
-
-<p>Then Mr. Temple, with an eager timidity
-so foreign to him that Mrs. Paul
-suppressed a smile with difficulty, wondered
-if Miss Graham would have time
-to go out on the river that evening? He
-knew she would be awfully busy; but it
-would be a heavenly evening on the
-river! He was so promptly assured that
-she should not have time that the poor
-fellow looked very blank; in fact, he was
-distinctly cross in the family circle for the
-rest of the day. At night he softened
-and tried to be amiable, for he was constrained
-to be confidential, and he knew
-that “Cousin Kate” would not hesitate
-to snub him unless he made himself
-agreeable.</p>
-
-<p>“Now, really, don’t you think she’s
-very unusual?” he insisted, after having
-told Mrs. Paul all the pleasant things
-which he could remember that Miss<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_162" id="Page_162">[162]</a></span>
-Graham had said to him about her two
-little pupils.</p>
-
-<p>“If you mean Miss Graham, why, yes,
-I do think she’s unusual, Dick.”</p>
-
-<p>“Did you ever notice,” said the fatuous
-Dick, “how softly her hair grows
-around her forehead? And her eyes&mdash;what
-color are her eyes?”</p>
-
-<p>“I’m sure I can’t say,” Mrs. Paul answered
-dryly. “Dick, would you mind
-going in and getting me a shawl? It’s
-rather cool out here on the terrace.”
-When he came back she had made up
-her mind how to proceed. “Now, Dick,
-listen, I’m not a snob, but”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“If you are going to say anything
-about that beautiful creature’s working
-for her living,” Dick threatened, “you
-might as well stop on the spot.”</p>
-
-<p>“Of course I’m not going to say anything
-about her working for her living;
-why should I? I worked for my living
-before I married John. You know I’m
-not a snob, but I do believe in class. I
-don’t mean to be unkind, and certainly
-she is a charming girl, and&mdash;ladylike.
-But&mdash;there is something, I can’t tell<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_163" id="Page_163">[163]</a></span>
-what it is&mdash;that seems as if she had not
-always been used to things”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>Dick Temple said something between
-his teeth, and his cousin flung her head
-up.</p>
-
-<p>“Dick!”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, it makes a man want to be emphatic,
-Cousin Kate,&mdash;such nonsense!
-Class? We’re Americans, thank the
-Lord! And talk about ancestors, I
-never saw descent so plainly. Look at
-the way she carries her head! And her
-voice, her manner! Darn it, because a
-girl’s poor”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Good-night, Richard,” said Mrs. Paul,
-rising with great dignity.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, hold on! Don’t get mad. Hold
-your base. I apologize; only, it seems
-pretty hard to be down on a girl”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“You know I’m not down on her; I
-like her very much; I respect her very
-much.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, then, what’s the matter?” demanded
-Dick boldly.</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t know. Only I have a vague
-recollection that when she came to teach
-the children she mentioned, in a casual<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_164" id="Page_164">[164]</a></span>
-sort of way, something about&mdash;about
-her home, or her father and mother, or
-something. I can’t really remember, but
-I know I gained the impression that she
-was”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Poor?” Dick burst in. “Of course
-she’s poor. She has never made any
-secret of that. Why should she? Only
-a cad would do that.”</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t mean poor,” Mrs. Paul said,
-frowning. “I wish you would have some
-manners, Dick, and not interrupt. I
-merely mean that a young man has no
-right to pay attention to a girl in another
-class unless he means to follow it up. I
-despise a trifler, Dick.”</p>
-
-<p>“You don’t despise him any more
-than I do,” Dick returned loftily. “But
-there isn’t any question of class here.
-We don’t have any higher class than
-hers; and as for ‘following it up,’ as you
-say&mdash;if a fellow thought there was any
-chance for him with that woman he’d
-follow it up quick enough, and ask her to
-marry him! Yes, and he ought to do it
-as formally as though she were a princess.
-She <em>is</em> a princess! He ought to go<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_165" id="Page_165">[165]</a></span>
-and ask her father if he might ask her.
-Her poverty, which seems to trouble you
-so much, Cousin Kate, has no bearing on
-the situation.”</p>
-
-<p>Poor Dick was smarting with Annie’s
-apparent coldness and his cousin’s snobbishness&mdash;so
-he called it; but there was
-really no excuse for bursting out at Mrs.
-Paul in this way; and it was no wonder
-that she said good-night with some asperity,
-and went upstairs and told her
-husband that Dick was a perfect goose,
-besides being rather a cub.</p>
-
-<p>“He’s twenty-four and old enough to
-know better,” she said. “Oh, dear, I do
-wish his father was here!”</p>
-
-<p>“You’d better wish her father was
-here; then you’d know the pit whence
-she was digged,” John Paul said. “Of
-course, if he ever sold cotton by the yard,
-Dick’s future happiness would be imperiled.”</p>
-
-<p>“Now, John, don’t be horrid,” said his
-wife impatiently; “you know perfectly
-well what I mean. I’m not a snob, as
-I told Dick, but there is such a thing as
-class.”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_166" id="Page_166">[166]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“If Dick’s worth anything,” pronounced
-John Paul, standing before his
-glass and ripping his collar off the stud
-with a vicious tug, “he’ll marry that girl
-if her father is a hod-carrier.”</p>
-
-
-<h3>II</h3>
-
-<p>Five years! It was a long time.
-Johnny, standing in the railroad station,
-his heart beating high with pride and
-joy, couldn’t help crying out when he
-saw her:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Why, how you’ve growed, Annie!
-Bless my heart, if you ain’t growed!”
-But his eyes were misty, so perhaps it
-was that made his little Annie look so
-tall. He had not recognized her for a
-moment,&mdash;this lady who, with the tears
-trembling in her eyes, came up to him
-and took his hands and cried out, “Father!”
-Afterward he said he didn’t
-know why he had taken her for a lady,
-for, sakes alive, her clothes were plain
-enough. He was quite distressed about
-her clothes.</p>
-
-<p>“You’ve stinted yourself, Annie,” he<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_167" id="Page_167">[167]</a></span>
-reproached her as they went home in the
-street cars. “You ought to be havin’ a
-silk dress, lookin’ the way you do. Why,
-I took you for a lady, Annie. You ought
-to have fine clothes, my pretty; we’ll
-take some money out of the bank and
-get you a regular silk dress,” he told her,
-scolding her and loving her, and bursting
-with pride, and taking up their intercourse
-just where it had paused, five
-years ago. She was a pretty girl and a
-great learner, Johnny thought; but she
-was just his Annie.</p>
-
-<p>It was late when they got home. He
-had left the kitchen fire clear and ready
-for the steak Annie would broil, and the
-gas was flaring wide from new burners,
-and Johnny had bought a long plush scarf
-for the top of the mantelpiece over the
-kitchen range. When Annie was fairly
-in the house, and the door was shut, it
-seemed as though the happiness of heaven
-had come into the little kitchen. Johnny
-laughed, and drew the back of his hand
-across his nose, and sniffed and blinked,
-and the tears ran freely down his little
-cheeks. He walked round and round<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_168" id="Page_168">[168]</a></span>
-Annie in critical inspection; and ran her
-from room to room, even up to Dave
-Duggan’s attic, to show her how unchanged
-everything was. He made her
-come into the parlor and showed her the
-faded ribbons and tottering plush frames.</p>
-
-<p>“I dusted ’em every Sunday, Annie,”
-he said. And then he told her how he
-had turned out the person to whom he
-had rented her old room. “Well, now,
-he was set on stayin’,” Johnny said;
-“he was always sayin’ he wanted to see
-you, but I guess Dave Duggan was just
-as well pleased not to have him round.
-Dave ain’t married yet, Annie.” Then
-Johnny laughed very much, and added,
-winking at his own joke, that he guessed
-Dave had forgotten her, she’d been away
-so long.</p>
-
-<p>The wonderful thing about it all, and
-the beautiful thing about it all, was that
-this little man did not in the least care
-that his Annie was an educated woman;
-he did not even know it.</p>
-
-<p>It seemed as if Annie could not enough
-show the tenderness that made her heart
-ache with its swelling. She sat beside<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_169" id="Page_169">[169]</a></span>
-him, holding his work-roughened hands
-in hers, and told him over and over about
-these five years which he had given her;
-she knew, and she was feeling as she
-spoke, how every joy of study, and every
-pang of the happiness of appreciation had
-come from these patient, loving, grimy
-old hands. “You’ve given me everything,”
-her heart was saying, “and I
-love you! I can never say how much.”
-But it seemed as though it were saying,
-also, “Why, why did you put me where
-I was to learn that you were you, and I
-was I?”</p>
-
-<p>One looks on at such a situation and
-says, “If it could stop here, it might be
-possible.” But it cannot stop there. It
-is not the adjustment of the relations
-between parents and child which is the
-difficult thing. The acceptance of a different
-point of view by these three may
-even come without much pain. No; it
-is the outsiders who make the situation
-impossible&mdash;the father’s cronies, the
-mother’s friends, the acquaintances of
-the untaught girlhood. The impossibility
-revealed itself that very night when Dave<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_170" id="Page_170">[170]</a></span>
-Duggan came in to welcome her home.
-Annie gave him her hand, flushing and
-paling at his familiarity, his boisterous,
-facetious “Hollo, Annie! How you
-was?” In him, after that easy greeting,
-the first note of the difference made for
-all time was struck; for he grew conscious
-and uneasy, and scuffled his feet,
-and cleared his throat, and laughed in a
-silly way. Yet all the old admiration
-spoke in his eyes. Johnny was full of
-significant jokes, and kept elbowing Annie
-and winking; and Dave’s loud rebukes
-of his host’s “fun” were even
-more meaning.</p>
-
-<p>At nearly midnight Annie went upstairs,
-tired, white, smiling; and lay open-eyed
-until dawn.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>Dick Temple’s intention of “passing
-through South Bend in a fortnight” was
-a little delayed. Cousin Kate’s vague
-misgivings took the form of a postscript
-in a casual note to his mother; there was
-no more than a word or two about Dick’s
-<i lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">tendresse</i> for a pretty college-girl who
-had been the children’s governess during<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_171" id="Page_171">[171]</a></span>
-the last three summers while they were
-out of town; that was all. But it was
-enough. And Mrs. Paul felt she had
-done her duty.</p>
-
-<p>“And perhaps prevented Dick from
-doing his,” her husband commented
-grimly.</p>
-
-<p>“If he can be prevented, he’d better
-be; for he wouldn’t be good enough for
-Annie Graham!” cousin Kate declared
-with much spirit, and immediately became,
-in her own mind, the champion of
-the incipient love affair.</p>
-
-<p>Her letter was passed on by Dick’s
-mother to Dick’s father, who said good-naturedly
-that the boy was a jackass.</p>
-
-<p>“The young lady is probably too good,
-for him,” said Mr. Henry Temple, “but
-I’m not going to have that boy marrying
-John Paul’s governess without a few
-remarks from me.”</p>
-
-<p>Mr. Temple telegraphed his son not to
-leave town on the day he had arranged,
-as he wished to see him; and then he
-came all the way from Old Chester for
-the purpose of making the remarks,
-which, of course, were to be general; it<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_172" id="Page_172">[172]</a></span>
-would give the matter too much importance
-to treat it as particular or probable.
-So, in a casual way, he referred to cousin
-Kate’s letter, and enjoined his son not to
-be a fool. Dick’s instantly aggressive
-attitude and skill in “answering back”
-were most surprising to Mr. Temple.
-A man is always surprised at his son’s
-ability in this direction; it is as though
-his own hand or foot suddenly acquired
-individuality. Furthermore, Richard was
-very sentimental, and had much to say
-of his father’s un-American point of view
-and of his own readiness to marry a
-“woman he loved” (if she’d have him) if
-she were a washerwoman.</p>
-
-<p>“As for Miss Graham,” said Dick,
-“I’ve no right even to speak of her; but
-she’s a lady, and an angel”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, Lord!” groaned Mr. Temple.
-“I wonder if I ever was as young as
-you, Dickon?”</p>
-
-<p>But he was really disturbed, and wrote
-to a friend who owned the great South
-Bend Rolling and Smelting Furnaces,
-and might be expected to know who and
-what the Grahams were.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_173" id="Page_173">[173]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>Meantime, Dick Temple, twice as much
-in earnest for his father’s not unreasonable
-expostulation, packed his things and
-started for the West. It was a hot July
-afternoon when he arrived in South Bend;
-he was fretted by the heat and his own
-impatience and the stupidity of the landlord
-of the hotel in being unable to tell
-him where Mr. Graham lived.</p>
-
-<p>“There’s no family by that name on
-the hill, sir,” he said. “Graham&mdash;Graham&mdash;there’s
-some Grahams here in
-the directory; what’s the gentleman’s
-business, sir?”</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t know,” Dick said, fuming.
-“What sort of a place is this, anyhow,
-that you don’t know where people live?
-It’s small enough for you to know everybody”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“We’ve twenty thousand inhabitants,
-young man,” said the landlord with much
-offense. “The only Graham I know is
-Johnny; he’s a gasfitter, and does odd
-jobs here once in a while”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Have your clerk copy all those Graham
-addresses,” said Dick coldly. “I’ll
-go round till I find the person I wish.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_174" id="Page_174">[174]</a></span>
-Unfortunately I don’t know the gentleman’s
-first name. Have you got any
-kind of conveyance in this place? Just
-have a hack called, will you?”</p>
-
-<p>He spoke with the insolence of tone
-peculiar to well-bred young men, and he
-walked to the open door and stood waiting
-for the carriage and frowning out at
-the passers-by. There was a red glare
-from the furnaces on the other side of
-the river, shifting and fading on the coils
-of black smoke which lay motionless in
-the still, hot air. The street was the
-narrow unlovely street of the small manufacturing
-town of the West.</p>
-
-<p>“It’s a beastly place,” Dick said to
-himself with an irritation which had its
-root in some formless apprehension; and
-he got into the lumbering, rattling hack
-and slammed the door with vicious emphasis.
-“What on earth does her father
-live here for, anyhow?” he said to himself.</p>
-
-<p>The carriage drew up first at a small
-market, where piles of faded vegetables,
-flanked by glass cases of meats, jutted
-out upon the pavement; a man in a dirty<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_175" id="Page_175">[175]</a></span>
-white butcher’s frock leaned against the
-door-post, and two jets of gas flared and
-flickered from long iron stand-pipes.</p>
-
-<p>The driver leaned down from his box
-and called out in friendly tones to know
-if this was the place.</p>
-
-<p>“Idiot!” said Dick under his breath.
-“Of course not. Try the next address.”</p>
-
-<p>This was a forlorn, untidy-looking
-house on a side street. Lodgers’ heads
-were thrust out of the windows as Dick
-climbed the steps and inquired whether
-Miss Annie Graham lived there? He
-was conscious of a distinct relief when he
-went back again to the carriage. They
-went to two other houses, but there was
-no Miss Annie Graham.</p>
-
-<p>“I guess,” said the hackman, “we’ll
-have to cross over to the other side of
-the river. There’s a Graham over there,
-at Jack’s Corners. Jack’s Corners is a
-fine suburb, sir.”</p>
-
-<p>Dick’s heart rose.</p>
-
-<p>“All right; go on,” he said. “Can’t
-you hurry those beasts of yours up?”</p>
-
-<p>And so it was that, about seven o’clock,
-the cabman drew up before a small, de<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_176" id="Page_176">[176]</a></span>tached
-frame house on the Mill Road.
-It was so hot that the kitchen windows
-were wide open, and one could see the
-table drawn up between them, and a little
-man in his shirt-sleeves eating his
-supper. Opposite him, by the other window,
-was a girl with a fan in her hand,
-and between them were two other persons,
-for Johnny was entertaining that
-night. Dave Duggan, uncomfortable, he
-knew not why (although it certainly was
-not the weather, for he had, with great
-good sense, removed his coat), sat on
-Annie’s left; and next to him, beside
-Johnny, was an enormously fat woman,
-in a sort of loose white sack. This was
-Mrs. Pugsley, who was one of those
-neighboring ladies of thwarted stepmother
-potentialities. “But you never
-know what’ll happen,” Mrs. Pugsley often
-remarked, and dropped in this hot
-July night in a friendly way to see if
-Annie was making her father comfortable.
-It was Mrs. Pugsley’s opinion that
-all this learning wasn’t no good. “Better
-know how to dish a meal’s victuals,”
-said Mrs. Pugsley, “than be readin’ story<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_177" id="Page_177">[177]</a></span>
-papers all the time. That’s what them
-high-school girls does mostly.”</p>
-
-<p>The room was faintly lighted by a
-kerosene lamp on the mantelpiece; but
-the real radiance was in Johnny’s face,
-as he looked across a bunch of roses in
-the middle of the narrow table at his
-Annie.</p>
-
-<p>“Annie walked out two miles to get
-them flowers,” he said.</p>
-
-<p>“Must ’a’ wanted something to do,”
-said Mrs. Pugsley.</p>
-
-<p>“I’d ’a’ got ’em for you, Annie,” Dave
-said bashfully, “if I’d a-known you
-wanted ’em.” And it was just then that
-the carriage drew up at the door.</p>
-
-<p>Dick, hot and disappointed and disgusted
-at the coachman’s stupidity in
-bringing him into this obviously mechanic’s
-suburb, leaned out to say,
-“Drive on!” And then he saw her.</p>
-
-<p>There was a flutter in the tenement at
-seeing a hack draw up. Johnny Graham
-rose, seeing in a burst of fancy an important
-and hasty job, and a carriage
-sent to convey him to a wilderness of
-leaks or broken tips. Mrs. Pugsley con<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_178" id="Page_178">[178]</a></span>ceived
-the hack to be a summons from a
-lady friend who had expected to need her
-services on a felicitous occasion, and was
-instantly agitated, and got up panting,
-and saying:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Goodness! they’ve sent!”</p>
-
-<p>But Annie knew.</p>
-
-<p>One wonders if she flinched, there in
-the twilight. She rose at once and
-went to the front door, her hand outstretched
-in pleased welcome.</p>
-
-<p>“Why, Mr. Temple! This is very
-pleasant,” she said. “Father, dear, this
-is Mr. Temple.”</p>
-
-<p>Dick’s face was white. He took Johnny
-Graham’s hand and bowed, with some
-murmured reference to pleasure.</p>
-
-<p>“This is my friend, Mr. Duggan, Mr.
-Temple,” Annie went on placidly, “and
-Mrs. Pugsley.”</p>
-
-<p>Dick bowed twice. He saw dimly, in
-the dusky kitchen interior, two other figures,
-one of which, assisted by the other,
-was struggling into a coat.</p>
-
-<p>“Why, now set down, sir,” Johnny
-said joyously; “take a seat and set down.
-Annie, now, can’t you make room there<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_179" id="Page_179">[179]</a></span>
-by Dave? We was just setting out to
-eat our tea, sir; it’s so hot, we was late,&mdash;but
-it’s the style to be late, I hear!
-I guess we ain’t eat up everything, have
-we, Annie? I guess there’s something
-left for your gentleman friend.”</p>
-
-<p>“You’re very kind,” Dick protested
-feebly; but he sat down, too bewildered
-to find any excuse.</p>
-
-<p>Annie put a plate before him, and told
-him he must have some iced tea.</p>
-
-<p>“It’s the only thing that makes life
-possible in this weather,” she said; “but
-I can’t make father believe it; he takes
-his boiling.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, sir,” said Johnny, “you had
-quite a jaunt to get out here, hadn’t you?
-But I don’t mind the walk myself, back
-and forth from my work, for it’s fresher
-out here.”</p>
-
-<p>“I didn’t know your address,” Dick
-said, not looking at Annie; “I’ve been
-driving round”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“When I saw that carriage drive up,”
-Mrs. Pugsley said, still panting, “I
-thought a lady friend of mine had sent
-for me; it give me such a start!”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_180" id="Page_180">[180]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“Tell me how you left Mrs. Paul,”
-Annie asked.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, thanks, very well,” Dick assured
-her; and there was a moment’s pause.
-Mrs. Pugsley and Dave were blankly
-silent. Annie talked against time.</p>
-
-<p>“It was so nice to get home. Just
-think, I had been away five years,” she
-said; “that’s a pretty long time not to
-see one’s father; father didn’t know me
-when he met me at the station;&mdash;now,
-I would have known you anywhere!”
-she reproached Johnny, with a loving
-look.</p>
-
-<p>“Well, but now, you’d growed, Annie;
-that’s what I said when I saw her. I
-says, ‘Why, Annie, you’ve growed!’
-Dave, here, don’t see no change in her.
-But I do,” Johnny ended proudly.</p>
-
-<p>“You must have missed your daughter
-very much,” Mr. Temple murmured.</p>
-
-<p>“Well, indeed, an’ he did,” Mrs. Pugsley
-said resentfully; “but she would be
-studyin’. She’s that set on it.”</p>
-
-<p>“Miss Graham is devoted to mathematics,”
-Dick began miserably, “and&mdash;and
-that sort of thing”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_181" id="Page_181">[181]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>He stopped so abruptly that Mrs.
-Pugsley’s hoarse whisper to Dave Duggan
-was audible to all,&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Say, is he Annie’s feller?”</p>
-
-<p>“Hush!” said Dave Duggan.</p>
-
-<p>Dick drank his tumbler of iced tea
-with violent haste, and even Johnny
-looked disconcerted. Annie said something
-about the roses.</p>
-
-<p>“The thing I miss most in South
-Bend are the gardens,” she said. “You
-know we are all working people on this
-side of the river, and there are no old
-houses, so there are no beautiful big
-gardens. I had to walk far out into the
-country for those.”</p>
-
-<p>“Won’t you have anything more?”
-Johnny inquired hospitably. “Take
-another helping of something? You
-won’t? Oh, now, take a taste of this!
-No? Well, let’s go into the parlor,
-Annie.”</p>
-
-<p>If Annie held back, no one saw it.
-They went into the best room, where
-Johnny set all the gas burners flaring,
-that the full glories of the decorations<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_182" id="Page_182">[182]</a></span>
-might strike the visitor, who, indeed, saw
-nothing but Annie’s set face.</p>
-
-<p>“Miss Graham,” he said, “you are
-coming East again in September, aren’t
-you?”</p>
-
-<p>“I think not; I think I must never
-leave father again. He is not very
-strong, and I want to be with him.”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, yes, quite so,” Dick answered,
-“but”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“But what, Mr. Temple?”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, nothing; I only thought&mdash;I
-thought you were to teach in the college,
-and”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>He did not know how to end his sentence;
-he caught Dave Duggan’s eyes
-glowering at him, and Johnny’s rather
-obsequious smile. Johnny had the true
-American veneration for wealth, and he
-felt that this gentleman who kept a hack
-waiting for an hour was a rich man.</p>
-
-<p>“I shall never leave my father,” Annie
-said, in a low voice.</p>
-
-<p>Now Richard Temple was not a mean
-or unworthy man; he was a well-born,
-well-bred, well-educated young American
-gentleman; but he had been placed sud<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_183" id="Page_183">[183]</a></span>denly
-at a cruel disadvantage; his presence
-of mind deserted him&mdash;he was
-bewildered and confounded. His plans
-and hopes were all adrift. He could not
-meet Annie Graham’s eyes again; he
-said good-night, at first effusively, and
-then haughtily; and sneaked out to his
-carriage, anxious only to escape from an
-intolerable situation.</p>
-
-<p>“Hope you’ll come again and talk over
-old times with Annie, sir,” Johnny said,
-shaking Dick’s hand all the time that
-he was speaking; “you’ll call again,
-sir?”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, certainly, yes, of course,” Dick
-answered wretchedly.</p>
-
-<p>But Annie knew better.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>Dave Duggan had watched Annie’s
-visitor with burning eyes. He followed
-the conversation with painful intentness,
-and a sense of speed which made him
-breathless. He wished to join in it,&mdash;and
-kept moistening his lips and clearing
-his throat, but he never found the courage
-to speak. His shyness probably
-prevented him from being rude; for his<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_184" id="Page_184">[184]</a></span>
-feeling about Dick was rage, pure and
-simple.</p>
-
-<p>“He’s a blamed dude,” he thought to
-himself again and again; but he could
-think of nothing to say which would convey
-this opinion, and yet fit into the conversation.
-But when Dick had slunk
-back to his carriage Dave’s feelings burst
-forth. For a few moments, indeed, the
-little group (except Annie) talked, in
-their excitement, all together.</p>
-
-<p>“Ain’t he handsome!” Johnny said
-proudly; he was proud of anything connected
-with Annie.</p>
-
-<p>“He’s real rich, Annie, ain’t he?
-Ridin’ in hacks?” Mrs. Pugsley demanded.</p>
-
-<p>“He’s a blamed dude; that’s what he
-is,” Dave said fiercely.</p>
-
-<p>“I thought he was your feller, Annie,”
-Mrs. Pugsley declared, panting and fanning
-herself.</p>
-
-<p>“Well, now, he’s none too good to
-be,” Johnny announced, chuckling.</p>
-
-<p>“Father, dear, wouldn’t it be nicer to
-sit out on the steps, where it’s cooler?
-I’ll put the tea things away, and then<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_185" id="Page_185">[185]</a></span>
-I’ll come, too. Please&mdash;<em>go!</em>” she
-ended. Johnny looked at her in surprise,
-sensitive to every change in her
-voice.</p>
-
-<p>“Why, now&mdash;Annie?” he faltered.</p>
-
-<p>“I’ll be through with the dishes in a
-few minutes, father, dear,” she said; and
-so Johnny led the way to the front door
-and placed a chair on the hard, black
-earth at the foot of the steps for Mrs.
-Pugsley, and told Dave to take off his
-coat again.</p>
-
-<p>“It’s that hot,” Johnny said, “there’s
-no good wearin’ coats.”</p>
-
-<p>“Now that dude’s gone, I suppose
-there’s no harm being comfortable,”
-Dave agreed angrily.</p>
-
-<p>They sat there in the dusk, Johnny
-and Mrs. Pugsley talking the visit over.
-They could hear Annie moving about in
-the kitchen, washing the dishes. After
-a while Dave Duggan got up and with
-painstaking and elaborate efforts not to
-attract attention went, with creaking,
-clumsy steps, into the kitchen. Annie
-stood by the sink, with her back to him.
-He heard her draw in her breath in a<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_186" id="Page_186">[186]</a></span>
-broken sob; and then he saw&mdash;he saw
-that tears were running down her face.</p>
-
-<p>“Annie!” he said; “oh, now, Annie,
-don’t, don’t mind, Annie, dear!” He
-put out his hands beseechingly, his face
-red and wincing with feeling. Annie
-turned her shoulder toward him, and set
-her teeth. She drew her wrist across
-her eyes.</p>
-
-<p>“It’s that dude’s hurt your feelin’s,
-Annie&mdash;darn him! but never you mind,
-he ain’t worth”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, please go away, Dave,” Annie
-said; “you don’t know what you are
-talking about! Please go back to father.”</p>
-
-<p>“Annie,” he burst out, “look here: he
-ain’t worth it. I say, Annie, will you
-take up with me?”</p>
-
-<p>“I really don’t know what you are
-talking about. Mr. Temple&mdash;if you
-are referring to him&mdash;has not hurt my
-feelings in the least. I&mdash;I had something
-on my mind, and”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, Annie,” poor Dave said, “what
-I’m wanting to know”&mdash;He stood
-there in his shirt-sleeves beside the sink,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_187" id="Page_187">[187]</a></span>
-his voice trembling, one big red hand
-opening and shutting the hot-water
-spigot. “I’m just wanting to know if
-you’ll marry me, Annie. Say, now, will
-you?”</p>
-
-<p>She shrank from him, a sort of horror
-in her face.</p>
-
-<p>“<em>You?</em>”</p>
-
-<p>“You ain’t mad?” he entreated.</p>
-
-<p>“It is quite impossible,” she answered
-hoarsely; “quite, quite! Never speak
-to me of such a thing”&mdash;Her face was
-stinging, her voice was broken, as a woman’s
-might be to whom some insulting
-thing had been said. “You will go, if
-you please,” she ended, her head high,
-and with a certain gesture that confounded
-him.</p>
-
-<p>“But look a-here,” he insisted, following
-her as she moved away from him;
-“Annie, look a-here; that fellow ain’t
-a-goin’ to marry anybody but a rich lady;
-his kind ain’t goin’ to marry you.”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, I shan’t marry my kind, then!
-You can just understand that,” she cried,
-with a sudden almost coarse fury.
-“There’s no use for you to think of such<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_188" id="Page_188">[188]</a></span>
-a thing. Don’t ever dare to spake to me
-that way again!”</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>This is as far as Annie Graham has
-lived her story. She and Dave practically
-summed the matter up between
-them: “His kind will not marry you;”
-and “I will not marry my kind.”</p>
-
-<p>The story is unfinished; one waits to
-see what will happen.</p>
-
-<p>There are three things open to Annie:
-She may live out her life in South Bend;
-teaching, perhaps, in the public school,
-gradually refining the terrible little
-house, rejoicing Johnny’s heart, and never
-interfering, merely for her own æsthetic
-necessities, with the unlovely habits of
-Johnny’s fifty years of unlovely living;
-she may learn to accept his intimates as
-her acquaintances, his Mrs. Pugsleys and
-Dave Duggans as household friends,
-starving all the while for the companionship
-of her equals. Or&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>She may shake off these intolerable
-surroundings which make her shrink as
-instinctively as an open eye shrinks from<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_189" id="Page_189">[189]</a></span>
-dust; she may turn her back on South
-Bend, and the tenement house, and the
-painted snow-shovel, and her father’s
-shirt-sleeves, and her father’s tender
-heart, and go out into the world to live
-her own strong, refined, intellectual life,
-perhaps as a teacher in her old college;
-marrying, after a while, some one who
-has never seen her father, and coming
-into the soul-destroying possession of
-that skeleton in the American closet&mdash;the
-vulgarity of the preceding generation.
-Or&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>She may, because of sheer misery in
-the struggle between the new and the
-old, and for the dreadful suffocating comfort
-of it, fall back into the pit whence
-she was digged and try to forget the upper
-air.</p>
-
-<p>What is the child’s duty? To live her
-own life, or to live some one else’s life?
-Is she to accept success or failure, fulfillment
-or renunciation?</p>
-
-<p>People differ as to what constitutes
-success; some go so far as to say that
-the highest fulfillment lies in renunciation;
-and certainly there was once a life<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_190" id="Page_190">[190]</a></span>
-that might have been called a failure because
-it ended upon a cross on Calvary.</p>
-
-<p>I suppose it all depends on how you
-look at it.</p>
-
-
- <div class="chapter"></div>
-<hr class="chap" />
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_191" id="Page_191">[191]</a></span></p>
-
-<h2><a name="THE_LAW_OR_THE_GOSPEL" id="THE_LAW_OR_THE_GOSPEL"></a><a href="#CONTENTS">THE LAW, OR THE GOSPEL</a></h2>
-
-
-<h3>I</h3>
-
-<div><img class="drop-cap" src="images/i_196.jpg" width="60" alt="" /></div>
-<p class="drop-cap">EVERYBODY in Mercer knew
-Sara Wharton; in the first
-place, she was Edward Wharton’s
-daughter; the Edward Wharton of
-the Wharton &amp; Blair Company, whose
-great Rolling and Smelting Mills darken
-Mercer’s sky with vast folds of black
-smoke, and give employment to two
-thirds of Mercer’s population. In the
-second place, she was a very charming
-young lady, who was too pretty to pass
-unnoticed when her victoria went rolling
-along the river road on fine afternoons.
-And in the third place, she was the president
-of two girls’ clubs, and the organizer
-of the Boys’ Alliance, and the Young
-Men’s Literary Association, and the
-founder of the <span class="nowrap">Y. W. C. T. U.,</span> and the
-kindly autocrat of all Mercer’s rough,
-grimy, under-fed young people. She<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_192" id="Page_192">[192]</a></span>
-was a sweet-hearted, wholesome-minded,
-impulsive, dear child; the kind of girl
-who loved a party just as much, and
-planned her pretty dresses just as anxiously,
-and adored her father and mother
-just as unreasonably, as though she had
-never heard of a committee, and was indifferent
-to the Cause of Humanity. All
-Mercer knew her, and believed in her;
-and so when, one gray November afternoon,
-she was seen to go quietly up the
-steps of a certain house on Baker Street&mdash;a
-house which decent folk affected to
-ignore when they passed it by at midday,
-but at which they glanced curiously after
-nightfall&mdash;when Sara Wharton went
-into this house, those who chanced to see
-her said only, “Well! what won’t that
-girl do next?”</p>
-
-<p>The woman who answered her ring
-opened the door scarcely more than a
-crack, and peered out at her sourly.</p>
-
-<p>“I want to see Nellie Sherman,” said
-Miss Wharton.</p>
-
-<p>“There’s no person by that name
-here,” the woman answered.</p>
-
-<p>“Let me in, please,” Sara Wharton<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_193" id="Page_193">[193]</a></span>
-said. She put her hand against the door,
-which yielded a little and then stopped;
-the woman inside had braced her foot
-against it.</p>
-
-<p>“She ain’t in.”</p>
-
-<p>“I will wait until she comes, then,” returned
-the young lady pleasantly.</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t know why you’re comin’ here
-lookin’ for a girl,” the woman cried out,
-in sudden, shrewish rage; “this is a respectable
-house; there’s no Sherman
-girl here!”</p>
-
-<p>“Let me in at once,” said Sara Wharton,
-“or I shall get a policeman, and
-have a warrant served. I know Nellie
-Sherman lives here, and I want to see
-her. You had better let me in without
-further talk. I am Miss Wharton.”</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t care if you are Queen Victoria,”
-the keeper of the house declared
-angrily; “well, you can come in, though
-there ain’t no Nellie Sherman here;
-there’s a Nettie Sherman,&mdash;if she’s the
-girl you’re looking for.”</p>
-
-<p>“Tell her I want to see her, please.”</p>
-
-<p>“She’s up in her room. You can go
-up.” Miss Wharton’s instant’s hesita<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_194" id="Page_194">[194]</a></span>tion
-made her add, “There ain’t nobody
-there.”</p>
-
-<p>The halls and stairs were nearly dark;
-one or two frowzy heads peered over the
-banisters, and drew back quickly; there
-was a loud guffaw of laughter from behind
-a closed door, and all the air was heavy
-with the reek of stale tobacco.</p>
-
-<p>“Her room’s the third floor back,” the
-woman called up after the visitor, who
-went swiftly over the stairs, intent upon
-her errand, yet with a faint shudder, a
-sort of physical shrinking, that made her
-gather her cloak close about her, lest it
-might touch the wall or banisters.</p>
-
-<p>“I’m glad I told Thomas to wait,” she
-said to herself, thinking of the brougham
-at the door, with the respectable, long-suffering
-Thomas on the box. At the
-third floor back she knocked, and waited
-for a reply; then she knocked again.</p>
-
-<p>“What is it?” a muffled voice asked;
-“is that you, Mamie? Go ’way! I’m
-busy.”</p>
-
-<p>“It is I; Miss Wharton; a friend of
-your aunt’s. Let me in, Nellie.” There
-was a breathless pause, and then a quick<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_195" id="Page_195">[195]</a></span>
-step, and a bolt was snapped back. A
-slight, startled-looking girl stood in the
-doorway. Sara entered with a certain
-fine, regal step that she had, that gave at
-once a sense of the uselessness of opposing
-her.</p>
-
-<p>“Shut the door,” she commanded
-cheerfully, “and let me see you. Come,
-we will sit down and have a little talk.
-Oh, open that window first; there is
-some dreadful perfumery in the room.
-Ah, that’s nice; fresh air is the nicest
-sort of perfumery; don’t you think so?”</p>
-
-<p>The girl stared at her without an answer.
-She was a delicate-looking creature,
-rather pretty, except that just now her
-face was stained with tears, and there
-was a sullen look about her little pale
-lips. But she had fair hair in a sort of
-aureole around her low forehead, and
-shading her really beautiful eyes; and
-she wore a crimson silk waist,&mdash;spotted,
-to be sure, and ripped on the shoulder,
-but bringing out the fairness of her
-skin, and the blue veins on her delicate
-temples.</p>
-
-<p>“I’m sure I haven’t the pleasure of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_196" id="Page_196">[196]</a></span>
-your acquaintance,” she said airily; but
-she was trembling.</p>
-
-<p>“I know your aunt, Mrs. Sherman,”
-her visitor said; then there was a moment’s
-silence. Sara Wharton looked
-about the untidy room,&mdash;with its banjo
-hung with ribbons, its looking-glass
-rimmed with cards and tintypes stuck
-edgewise within the frame; its litter of
-cigarette ends, and its half-empty, uncorked
-bottle of beer on the marble-topped
-centre-table.</p>
-
-<p>“Your aunt told me about you, my
-child,” she said, with a deep, kind look
-full into the girl’s face.</p>
-
-<p>The color rushed into Nellie’s pale
-cheeks; but she only said, with vast indifference,
-“Is that so? Well, she’s very
-kind, I’m sure.”</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t know that she has always
-been very kind,” Sara Wharton answered
-thoughtfully. “Now shut that
-window behind you; I don’t want you
-to sit in a draft; and the fresh air has
-driven out the perfumery. Why do you
-use perfumery, Nellie? Nice girls don’t.”</p>
-
-<p>The girl looked at her blankly.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_197" id="Page_197">[197]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“Yes; your aunt told me about you.
-She told me how she had taken care of
-you ever since your mother died; and
-how she had sent you to school, and
-bought pretty dresses for you, and done
-the housework herself so that you
-shouldn’t spoil your hands; and how she
-took in washing so that you might go
-to dancing-school. She loved you very
-much, Nellie; but I am not sure that she
-was kind. Perhaps if you had had to
-work you wouldn’t have come to this
-dreadful house, and brought shame and
-disgrace to Mrs. Sherman. You’ve broken
-her heart, Nellie.”</p>
-
-<p>The girl’s face paled and flushed; and
-then quivered suddenly into a storm of
-tears.</p>
-
-<p>“<em>I</em> don’t like it here. But I can’t help
-it. I lost my place in the shop. I was
-late, and they discharged me. And I
-was afraid to go home and tell my aunt,
-she jaws at me so. That was four weeks
-ago. It was the third place I’d lost. So
-I&mdash;came here. I don’t like it. I was
-just crying when you came in!” She
-squeezed her handkerchief into a damp<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_198" id="Page_198">[198]</a></span>
-ball and pressed it against her eyes, sobbing.
-“The woman is so cross. And&mdash;and
-I owe her for board.”</p>
-
-<p>Sara was silent.</p>
-
-<p>“But there ain’t anything I can do;
-I’d die rather than go back to my aunt’s.
-She’d never forgive me. I don’t blame
-her. But <em>I</em> don’t like it here.”</p>
-
-<p>“Perhaps your aunt will forgive you?”
-Sara said gently. Nellie rocked back
-and forth, sobbing.</p>
-
-<p>“I’m too wicked,” she recited; her
-eyes roved over Sara’s dark dress, and
-inspected her pretty little bonnet, and
-dwelt on the glitter of an amethyst pin
-at her throat. “Oh, dear, I wish I
-hadn’t; I wish I was dead,” she said
-helplessly.</p>
-
-<p>Sara Wharton’s face lit with a quick
-tenderness. She put her arm over the
-child’s bent shoulders, and drew the wet
-cheek down against her breast. “My
-dear, if you are sorry, if you know that it
-is wicked and dreadful, then the worst is
-over. Don’t wish to die&mdash;wish to live,
-so that you may be good. I know you
-<em>can</em> be good!” she ended, with a burst of<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_199" id="Page_199">[199]</a></span>
-courage in her voice, that struck some
-answering chord in the poor, half-developed
-little soul at her side. Nellie looked
-up.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, I will be good&mdash;if I can; just get
-out of here! I’m just about sick, anyway;
-I’ve got such a pain under my left
-shoulder; and I’m just tired of it&mdash;and
-Mrs. Smith is so cross. But I can’t go
-home. My aunt’ll jaw at me. Oh, I
-can’t ever go home!” She whimpered
-a little, and looked at her pretty finger
-nails critically.</p>
-
-<p>“I’m <em>sure</em> your aunt will forgive
-you!” Sara said, impetuous and tender.
-“Let’s go and ask her to, now.”</p>
-
-<p>“Mrs. Smith won’t let me go, I guess,”
-Nellie sighed; “I owe her two weeks
-board.”</p>
-
-<p>“I will pay her.”</p>
-
-<p>“I’ll come to-morrow,” the child demurred.</p>
-
-<p>“Nellie, dear, I want you to come
-now! Oh, Nellie, won’t you begin this
-minute to be good?”</p>
-
-<p>“I’m not so very bad,” Nellie protested,
-“and I can’t come now, truly. I<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_200" id="Page_200">[200]</a></span>
-haven’t any sack. I&mdash;sold it.” The
-tears welled up in her soft eyes at the
-remembrance of her poverty.</p>
-
-<p>“You don’t need a sack. You’ll
-come in my carriage, and I’ll wrap a rug
-around you.”</p>
-
-<p>“My!” said Nellie, “is your carriage
-here? One of the club girls told me
-it had satin cushions. Is that so, Miss
-Wharton?”</p>
-
-<p>Sara bit her lip. “Never mind about
-the cushions. Oh, Nellie, dear, don’t
-think of things like that! Only just try
-with all your might to be good. Will
-you, Nellie?”</p>
-
-<p>“Why, certainly,” said Nellie.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>Sara Wharton drove home with a very
-serious look on her face. She had induced
-Nellie to leave that dreadful house;
-indeed, the girl had yielded with that
-fatally facile willingness to do what she
-was told which should have forbade any
-of the joy that may be felt over the one
-sinner that repenteth. But in the glow
-of “saving” the poor child, it was not
-easy for Sara Wharton to realize that<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_201" id="Page_201">[201]</a></span>
-Nellie’s first experience of sin had only
-reached the stage of the young smoker’s
-disgust with his first cigar. The young
-lady, with her carriage and her satin
-cushions, had come at the right moment&mdash;the
-moment when the expediency of
-morality had forced itself upon the girl’s
-little, flimsy common-sense, and she was
-willing to go shuddering back to comfortable
-decency; but as for any spiritual
-perception of sin, and righteousness, and
-judgment, it did not exist.</p>
-
-<p>Nellie had received her aunt’s forgiveness
-as though she were conferring a
-favor. Indeed, she sighed with some
-impatience when Mrs. Sherman wept
-over her; and she said again, fretfully, in
-response to Miss Wharton’s assertions
-that <em>now</em> Nellie was going to be good,&mdash;“Why
-certainly, yes;” and looked about
-wearily, as if she wished the scene might
-come to an end.</p>
-
-<p>“Nobody shan’t never know, my darling,”
-Mrs. Sherman told her, her voice
-breaking with tenderness; “I’ll say
-you’ve been away, visiting friends.”</p>
-
-<p>“A’ right,” said Nellie. And neither<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_202" id="Page_202">[202]</a></span>
-the aunt nor the niece understood Miss
-Wharton’s quick protest against trying
-to hide one sin by another.</p>
-
-<p>Sara, driving home, tired and saddened
-by the emotions of the afternoon, acknowledged
-to herself that the easy repentance
-was made of still less value by
-the easy forgiveness.</p>
-
-<p>“But some day she will repent, really
-and truly,” she told herself; but she
-sighed, and dropped the window of the
-brougham, leaning forward to get the
-dash of wet, cold wind in her face. It
-seemed to her as though she still felt the
-lifeless air of those horrible halls and
-stairways, and the scent of musk, and
-tobacco smoke, and stale liquor.</p>
-
-<p>“The only thing to do, the only way
-to save her is to love her,” Sara Wharton
-said to herself, “and I’m going to
-love her!”</p>
-
-<p>When she reached home, and came in
-out of the cold dusk into the firelit hall,
-this divine intention of loving shone on
-her face with a beautiful solemnity. Her
-seriousness was so marked that her
-mother, who was just saying good even<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_203" id="Page_203">[203]</a></span>ing
-to a departing caller, noticed it and
-said, with some anxiety:&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“My dear, there is nothing the matter,
-I hope?”</p>
-
-<p>“No, mother darling,” the girl reassured
-her, with a glance at the tall fellow
-who stood with his hat and stick in his
-hand, waiting for Mrs. Wharton’s bow.</p>
-
-<p>“Sara, my dear, this is Dr. Morse.
-My daughter, Dr. Morse.”</p>
-
-<p>“I ventured to come and tell a sad
-story to your mother, Miss Wharton,”
-said the young man, “a dispensary story.
-I’ve just come on duty at the dispensary;
-but Mrs. Wharton’s kindness was so proverbial,
-that when I stumbled on a hard
-case, I came at once to tell her about it.”</p>
-
-<p>“I’ve no doubt she was delighted to
-hear of it,” Sara said; “mother would
-really be dreadfully unhappy if everybody
-was prosperous; her occupation
-would be gone.”</p>
-
-<p>“Why, Sara! Sara! you mustn’t say
-such things,” Mrs. Wharton reproved
-her, looking at her daughter over her
-gold spectacles, with the horrified protest
-of a simple and literal mind.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_204" id="Page_204">[204]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>The other two laughed, feeling suddenly
-very well acquainted.</p>
-
-<p>“So long as she lives in Mercer, Mrs.
-Wharton’s happiness is assured,” the
-doctor said; and went away, saying to
-himself, “What a girl! I don’t wonder
-people rave about her; she’s stunning!
-But I’m afraid she’s a professional philanthropist.”</p>
-
-<p>“So that’s the new doctor?” Sara
-said, pulling off her gloves; “he has a
-nice face, rather. Did you like him, darling?”</p>
-
-<p>“Yes,” her mother answered doubtfully,
-“only, Sara, my dear, he seems
-rather a stern young man. I wanted to
-give him a check for this poor woman he
-came to tell me about; but he said that
-I must let her clean windows, or something,
-to earn it. And you know, my
-dear child, that would interfere with
-James’s work. I’d much rather give
-the check than arrange for work.”</p>
-
-<p>Sara kissed her, and cuddled her, for
-Mrs. Wharton was a little, roly-poly, comfortable
-sort of woman, and told her she
-was behind the times.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_205" id="Page_205">[205]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“Nowadays,” announced the young
-lady, “the ‘gave to him that asketh’
-method is hopelessly unscientific; bless
-your dear old-fashioned heart!”</p>
-
-
-<h3>II</h3>
-
-<p>The saving of Nellie Sherman became
-an intense and passionate purpose in
-Sara Wharton’s life. Day by day, hour
-by hour, she watched and fought and
-prayed. She invented (according to the
-most approved charity methods) work for
-the vain and shiftless child; she had her
-taught to sew; she was careful to provide
-plenty of bright and wholesome
-amusement for her; by and by Nellie
-felt yearnings to be a bookkeeper, and
-Sara Wharton sent her to a commercial
-school. “You can pay me back when
-you get work,” she said, as cheerfully
-as though she believed that Nellie was
-capable of feeling a money obligation.
-She entered Nellie’s name at her Girls’
-Club; she took her to concerts, and sent
-her books, and planned and thought and
-hoped; and always, always prayed. Fur<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_206" id="Page_206">[206]</a></span>thermore,
-she loved the girl. That is to
-say, she called it love; and perhaps it
-was, in its way; at least it was that
-greater love that is content to give and
-not receive. Sara gave her very self&mdash;her
-power, her charm, her sweet and
-generous enthusiasms&mdash;fully and freely
-into the little, mean hands that were
-held out to take all they could get. “Because,”
-she said to herself, again, “the
-only way to reach her is to love her.
-Love is the greatest thing in the world!
-I’ve no doubt I would have been just as
-bad as Nellie if I hadn’t had so much
-love.” This thought made the girl rise,
-and go and push her mother’s sewing
-aside, and kiss her, with a little half
-laughing break in her voice, and her eyes
-suddenly wet with tears.</p>
-
-<p>“What is it? What is it?” Mrs.
-Wharton said breathlessly, adjusting her
-spectacles, which the impetuous embrace
-had disturbed; “is anything the matter,
-Sara?”</p>
-
-<p>“No,” her daughter answered, with a
-laugh, winking away the tears, “I was
-just thinking how lucky I was to have<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_207" id="Page_207">[207]</a></span>
-you for a mother, you darling! If I’d
-had some cross old mother I should have
-been&mdash;I should have been a fiend! I
-haven’t a doubt of it. I’d have been
-just as wicked as poor Nellie Sherman.”</p>
-
-<p>“Nothing of the sort!” retorted Mrs.
-Wharton, much ruffled; “please remember
-what kind of people your grand-parents
-on both sides were, and don’t say
-such unladylike things, Sara. Dear, dear,
-I don’t know what girls are coming to in
-these days. When I was young, young
-ladies didn’t know that such improper
-persons existed as your Nellie Sherman.
-I wish you would have nothing to do with
-her.”</p>
-
-<p>Sara, on her knees beside the little,
-rosy, kindly lady, pulled her cap straight,
-and scolded her for making her forefinger
-rough with so much sewing.</p>
-
-<p>“You are always making petticoats for
-poor people,” she said severely, “instead
-of talking to me about my winter clothes.
-I want a new dinner dress, ma’am, and
-you’ve got to buy it. I’ve used up all
-my allowance, and borrowed from father
-on the next quarter; so please help the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_208" id="Page_208">[208]</a></span>
-deserving poor of your own household.
-Charity begins at home, let me tell you!
-Who is to have this petticoat?&mdash;while
-your own poor child is in want of a satin
-gown!”</p>
-
-<p>“Well,” Mrs. Wharton said, with some
-confusion, “the fact is, Nellie looks so
-sickly I am afraid she is not warmly
-enough clad”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>Sara shrieked with laughter. “Consistency,
-thy name is Mother,” she cried;
-and began to pour out her plans for Nellie,
-which Mrs. Wharton amended several
-times, objecting to Sara’s assertion that
-Nellie should repay the money expended
-for her tuition at the commercial college.</p>
-
-<p>“The poor thing will have so little
-money, anyhow,” she entreated. But
-Sara held to her theory.</p>
-
-<p>“We’ll make it up in other ways,&mdash;petticoats,
-and things, but she must feel
-it a loan,” she said.</p>
-
-<p>However, Miss Wharton’s theories
-were far too fine for the material with
-which she worked. When the three
-terms at the commercial college were<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_209" id="Page_209">[209]</a></span>
-over, Nellie was languidly grateful, but
-she doubted whether she should like
-bookkeeping; she was, however, willing
-to “give it a trial;” so Sara found a place
-in a shop for her, and, as the proprietor
-(another friend and dependent) could not
-pay the full wages, made up the sum herself.
-But it never occurred to Nellie to
-begin to pay her debt; and Sara, fearful
-of antagonizing the child, cast her theory
-to the winds, and did not suggest it.</p>
-
-<p>So the first year passed. The anxious,
-courageous, artificial fight never
-flagged; and Nellie, for twelve months,
-was “straight.” There had been great
-expenditure of time and strength and
-money to save the little creature; and
-in a purely negative way the effort had
-been successful. Nellie was “straight.”</p>
-
-<p>Yet Sara Wharton was sometimes
-dreadfully discouraged; she could not
-see a single large or noble trait in the
-girl, although it was her sweet and loving
-theory to believe in what she did
-not see.</p>
-
-<p>“Goodness is there, somewhere!” she
-used to say to herself, with a beautiful<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_210" id="Page_210">[210]</a></span>
-and courageous belief which was part of
-her own character; and then she fell
-back on what she had called “the greatest
-thing in the world:” “Goodness is
-there, and I’ve got to <em>love it out</em>!”
-She took Nellie’s latent goodness for
-granted, especially in her effort to overcome
-the child’s enveloping selfishness.
-She was constantly trying to make her
-realize the happiness of sacrifice.</p>
-
-<p>“Nellie,” she said once, “now that
-you’ve got your place as bookkeeper,
-and are earning some money, of course
-you want to pay me; but I think, even
-before that, you must want to pay for
-your board at your aunt’s. She has
-been so good to you, you know; and
-I’m sure you’ll be glad to help her along
-a little?”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, certainly!” Nellie replied, with
-a blank look.</p>
-
-<p>“How much do you think you can
-pay?” Sara suggested cheerfully.</p>
-
-<p>“Well, just now,” Nellie demurred, “I
-really have to have a new dress; perhaps,
-later, I can give her a little something.”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_211" id="Page_211">[211]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>Sara looked at her wistfully. “Don’t
-you <em>want</em> to, Nellie? I should think your
-very first thought would be to do something
-for her. Just think what she has
-done for you!”</p>
-
-<p>“Of course, I mean to,” Nellie said,
-tossing her head, “but I’ve got to have
-a dress&mdash;and things.”</p>
-
-<p>“If only,” Sara reflected, “she could
-once understand how awfully nice it is to
-give!” and then she planned that every
-Saturday Nellie might come to the greenhouse
-and get some roses from the gardener,&mdash;“and
-take them to the hospital.
-It is delightful to do that!” she said.
-And Nellie smiled faintly, and said, “Oh,
-certainly;” but only came once for the
-flowers.</p>
-
-<p>Nevertheless, Nellie Sherman had been
-“rescued.” Almost the same sort of
-rescue would have been achieved if Sara
-had fastened her into a strait-jacket and
-locked her into a room. But with Miss
-Wharton on one side, and her aunt on
-the other, day and night, the strange,
-boneless, unmoral little nature “kept
-straight;” and in a glimmering way the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_212" id="Page_212">[212]</a></span>
-girl even began to see that there were
-certain views which were thought admirable,
-and once in a while she tried them
-on, as it were, and regarded herself in the
-mirror of Miss Wharton’s warm and joyous
-approbation.</p>
-
-<p>“I was so sorry not to see you at the
-club last night, Nellie,” Sara said to her
-one day, dropping in to buy a pair of
-gloves at the shop where Nellie kept the
-books.</p>
-
-<p>“My aunt wasn’t well,” said Nellie,
-“and I stayed at home to take care of
-her.” Such a light came into Sara Wharton’s
-sweet face, such tenderness and triumph
-and quick hope, that Nellie looked
-at her curiously.</p>
-
-<p>“That was right, Nellie, dear,” she
-said; “I’m so glad you did it. I’m <em>so</em>
-glad,” she repeated, and went away, her
-eyes misty and her heart lifted up. She
-could not help going in to see Mrs. Sherman,
-making the excuse of bringing her
-some fruit because she was ill, but really
-to share her exultation.</p>
-
-<p>“Sick?” said Mrs. Sherman, “why,
-no, ma’am, I’m not sick, no more than I<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_213" id="Page_213">[213]</a></span>
-always am with worry about that there
-Nellie. She didn’t come home from the
-club last night until after eleven, and I
-was scared to death for fear she’d gone
-off with them Caligan girls&mdash;they’re fast
-girls, that’s what they are; and she’s
-struck up a great friendship with ’em.
-My, she’ll worry me into my grave,
-Nellie will. But she said you’d kept her
-late to help you putting away the club
-books,&mdash;and of course that was all
-right.”</p>
-
-
-<h3>III</h3>
-
-<p>“You owe something to your family,
-my child,” Mrs. Wharton said one day;
-“you make us all very anxious and worried
-by overworking so; it’s your duty
-to take a little rest.”</p>
-
-<p>“Mother, darling,” Sara began to protest,
-“I really can’t go away now; the
-Girls’ Club and”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“You needn’t begin the list, my dear,”
-her mother interrupted&mdash;“I know them
-all. Dear, dear! Sara, when I was a
-girl, young women owed some duties to<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_214" id="Page_214">[214]</a></span>
-their parents, as well as to all the shiftless,
-worthless, improper people in the world.”</p>
-
-<p>“I trust I’m not a Borrioboola-Gha
-person,” murmured Sara.</p>
-
-<p>“Don’t be foolish, my child,” Mrs.
-Wharton said, “and use long words when
-your poor old mother don’t know what
-they mean”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“You darling!” said Sara, and hugged
-her so tightly that Mrs. Wharton remonstrated.</p>
-
-<p>“It would be a great deal more to the
-point if, instead of kissing me, you would
-be an obedient child. You worry me almost
-to death, working so hard. I want
-you to come to Florida. I asked Dr.
-Morse if he didn’t think you were doing
-too much, and he said you took a great
-deal of unnecessary trouble; so you see
-he agrees with me.”</p>
-
-<p>“Mother, dear, how you adore doctors!
-Dr. Morse doesn’t know what he’s talking
-about. But you might tell me what
-else he said?”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, some nonsense about&mdash;about
-your being of so much value to Mercer,”
-Mrs. Wharton admitted, with evident<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_215" id="Page_215">[215]</a></span>
-fear that one statement might lessen the
-effect of the other.</p>
-
-<p>But whether it was Dr. Morse’s understanding
-of the value of her work, or
-whether it was her mother’s entreaties,
-Sara at last agreed to go away for a little
-while, though it was hard work to get
-things in running order for a three months’
-absence of their head. Nellie was her
-greatest anxiety; three months without
-oversight and guidance&mdash;who could tell
-what might happen! So Sara made
-many plans; the girl was to be guarded
-on this side and on that: she was to have
-steady work, and she was to have frequent
-amusement; pleasure and profit
-were all arranged. And before she went,
-Sara had a little talk with her. She had
-sent for the girl, who came up into her
-bedroom, where, just before dinner, Miss
-Wharton was sitting in the firelight.
-The pretty room was full of dusky shadows;
-its faint scent of roses, its deep,
-soft chairs, the shimmer of silver on the
-toilet-table, all its delicate luxury, was
-evident enough to Nellie. The sullen
-upper lip swelled out as she looked en<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_216" id="Page_216">[216]</a></span>viously
-about her. She liked the touch
-of the silk cushions, the feeling of the
-soft white rug under her feet; the color
-of Miss Wharton’s crimson tea-gown fed
-her eyes with delight. She hardly heard
-what the young lady was saying.</p>
-
-<p>“Nellie, dear, I want you to try your
-very best to be good while I’m away.”</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, certainly,” said Nellie, with a
-sigh.</p>
-
-<p>Sara clasped her hands together over
-her knees, and held her lip between her
-teeth, drawing in her breath; Nellie
-watched her rings wink and flash in the
-firelight.</p>
-
-<p>“Nellie” (Sara was saying to herself,
-“Oh, I <em>hope</em> I will say what is wise. I
-<em>hope</em> I can touch her!”), “Nellie, you
-know how I have always believed in you,
-and hoped for you, and loved you; and
-just because I have, and because I am
-truly, truly your friend, I want to ask
-you to do two things for me while I’m
-away: first, promise me not to tell another
-lie; oh, Nellie, you don’t know how
-unhappy you made me when you told me
-that lie about the club.”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_217" id="Page_217">[217]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>Nellie dropped her head upon her
-breast, and made no answer.</p>
-
-<p>“And then,” Sara went on, “I want
-you to try not to be so selfish. I am so
-grieved to have you indifferent to Mrs.
-Sherman’s kindness to you. She told
-me that you had only given her one dollar
-and seventy-five cents since you went
-to work. And don’t you see, you have
-been receiving everything she could give
-you, of love and care, and yet you have
-given her nothing! You haven’t even
-been kind to her, Nellie.”</p>
-
-<p>“<em>Oh!</em>” said Nellie, “well, I wish I
-was dead. Everybody’s always finding
-fault. I’m sure there’s lots of girls
-worse than me. But I’m always being
-picked at. I wish I was dead.”</p>
-
-<p>Sara was nervous and overstrained;
-besides, she was conscious of a sort of
-physical disgust at this poor, repulsive
-little being; her self-reproach brought
-the tears to her eyes. “I didn’t mean
-to be hard on you, Nellie,” she said,
-“only I want you to try.”</p>
-
-<p>“I <em>always</em> try,” said Nellie.</p>
-
-<p>“And,” Sara’s brave young voice went<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_218" id="Page_218">[218]</a></span>
-on, “I do want you to feel that&mdash;that
-Christ cares; that God cares, Nellie, that
-you shall be a good, true, dear girl. Will
-you just think of that, Nellie?”</p>
-
-<p>“Why, of course,” Nellie answered resentfully,
-wiping her eyes. “I do always.
-My aunt makes me go to church every
-Sunday. Miss Sara, do you think you
-have any pieces of velvet in your rag-bag?”</p>
-
-<p>Sara started. “Rag-bag?” she repeated
-vaguely, “velvet?”</p>
-
-<p>“I thought I could trim my hat over,”
-Nellie explained. “You’ve got so many
-things,” she ended sullenly.</p>
-
-<p>Sara was silent for a few minutes,
-reasoning with herself. After all, Nellie
-was young; it was natural for her to like
-pretty things.</p>
-
-<p>“Yes, I can give you some velvet, I
-think,” she said cheerfully; “and, Nellie,
-I have a plan for you; what are you
-going to give your aunt for a Christmas
-gift?”</p>
-
-<p>Nellie looked up blankly.</p>
-
-<p>“I know you’ll want to give her something,”
-Sara went on, “and I was think<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_219" id="Page_219">[219]</a></span>ing
-of a nice chair. What do you think
-of that?”</p>
-
-<p>“A chair!” repeated Nellie in astonishment.
-“Why, I wouldn’t buy a chair
-for myself!”</p>
-
-<p>Sara sighed. “But you would like the
-fun of buying one for somebody else,
-wouldn’t you?”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, I ain’t got any money,” the
-girl said uneasily; and then Miss Wharton
-unfolded her plan, which was that
-she should give Nellie five dollars, and
-Nellie would add what she could, and a
-present should be purchased.</p>
-
-<p>“Add something, if it’s only a dollar,”
-Sara said pleadingly; “a good,
-comfortable chair can be bought for six
-dollars.”</p>
-
-<p>“A’ right; I don’t mind,” Nellie
-agreed, in a wearied way. She did not
-understand all this talk; she saw no
-reason in Miss Sara’s giving Mrs. Sherman
-a chair, and saying it was Nellie’s
-gift; still, she didn’t mind.</p>
-
-<p>“You’ll like to do that, won’t you,
-Nellie?” Sara said anxiously.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, certainly,” said Nellie, and then<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_220" id="Page_220">[220]</a></span>
-she rose, for Miss Wharton was silent,
-and that seemed a sign of dismissal.</p>
-
-<p>Sara rose, too, and stood looking at
-her visitor for a moment; then, suddenly
-she put her arm around the little thin
-shoulders, and drew the girl to her, and
-kissed her. “Oh, Nellie,” she said, her
-voice passionate and trembling,&mdash;“Oh,
-Nellie, <em>dear</em>! I&mdash;I wish I knew what
-to say, to show you&mdash;to make you feel”&mdash;her
-voice broke; Nellie was greatly
-embarrassed;&mdash;“but just believe <em>I love
-you</em>, won’t you? and be good!”</p>
-
-<p>“Why,” said Nellie, with a sigh of fatigue
-and reproach, “certainly!” Then
-she added, “Well, good-by; hope you’ll
-have a delightful time, I’m sure,” and
-closed Miss Sara’s door, with a sense of
-relief that was like the lifting of some
-harassing weight. She came slowly
-downstairs, pulling on her soiled gloves,
-and walking with a mincing step. Escaped
-from Miss Wharton’s room, she
-felt as if all the luxury of this great house&mdash;the
-color, the lights, the soft carpet
-under her feet, the sparkle of the firelight
-in the hall below&mdash;was hers, and<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_221" id="Page_221">[221]</a></span>
-so she assumed the gait and the manner
-which she conceived to belong to an
-owner. The inside-man was just lighting
-a lamp under a big rose-colored
-shade, and Nellie threw up her head with
-a haughty look, and drew down the corners
-of her mouth, sweeping past him
-toward the door. James, however, smiled
-with great politeness.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, g’d evening, Miss Sherman,” he
-said. “My! it does seem to get dark
-early these days, doesn’t it?”</p>
-
-<p>Nellie’s lofty coldness melted instantly.
-She simpered and said, “Is that so?”</p>
-
-<p>“It’s quite late for a young lady to be
-out alone,” James remarked with grave
-solicitude.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, that’s a’ right,” Nellie protested.</p>
-
-<p>She was smiling, and holding her head
-coquettishly, and looking up at him with
-great archness. She dropped her handkerchief
-as she reached the front door
-and James picked it up, and handed it to
-her with an elaborate bow. He caught
-her fingers in his own as he did so, and
-they both giggled, and Nellie said, “Now,
-you stop that!”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_222" id="Page_222">[222]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>They lowered their voices with an apprehensive
-look towards the staircase;
-James opened the door and stepped out
-on the porch with her. “Well, you
-oughtn’t to be severe, Miss Sherman;
-it’s such a little hand, a gentleman can’t
-help it; Miss Sara’s is twice as big.”</p>
-
-<p>“Is that so?” said Nellie; and then
-they both looked up at the sky, and
-James observed that the weather was
-threatening, and it certainly <em>was</em> too dark
-for a young lady, a beautiful young lady,
-to be out alone.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, that’s a’ right,” Nellie reassured
-him politely.</p>
-
-<p>James in an absent-minded way put
-his arm round her, and said he thought
-ladies ought always to have gentlemen
-escorts.</p>
-
-<p>“Is that so?” Nellie answered, simpering;
-and, with the same apparent
-absence of mind, sidling closer to him,
-which induced his easy caresses; “well,
-I must be going along,” she announced,
-giggling.</p>
-
-<p>“Well, good-by, Miss Sherman,” said
-the chivalrous James, and gave her a<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_223" id="Page_223">[223]</a></span>
-hearty kiss, which made Nellie slap at
-him with one hand, and say, “Now you
-stop that!” and go off, still giggling,
-into the darkness.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>Sara Wharton, upstairs by her fire, had
-dropped her face in her hands, and was
-saying to herself, “I must trust her
-more, and believe in her more! Oh, I
-am sure she tries&mdash;poor little Nellie.”</p>
-
-<p>And certainly poor Nellie was not conscious
-of any lack of trying, so far as the
-episode with James was concerned. To
-her, as well as to him, it was very harmless,
-that kiss in the porch. And really
-to call such a thing “sin” is to lift it to
-a level where it does not belong.</p>
-
-<p>But probably Sara Wharton was constitutionally
-unable to understand that.</p>
-
-<p>The people who try to make silk purses
-out of inadequate materials rarely can
-understand it.</p>
-
-
-<h3>IV</h3>
-
-<p>The Whartons did not get back until
-April, and the improvement in Sara’s
-color, and the clear, glad look in her<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_224" id="Page_224">[224]</a></span>
-eyes, showed how much she had needed
-the change. She was all ready for her
-brave, happy work for other people.
-Her very first visit was to Nellie’s aunt.
-When she climbed up to the top tenement,
-stopping to open a window on a
-landing half way up, so that the sweet
-spring air might turn out the odors of
-the hall-sink, and of the dirt in the corners
-and on the stairs, she came into
-Mrs. Sherman’s room a little breathless,
-but with a soft rose-color on her cheek.</p>
-
-<p>“Well!” she called out cheerfully,
-“here I am again, Mrs. Sherman; how
-are you; and how is Nellie?” and then
-she discovered Nellie sitting close to the
-stove, on which was a tin boiler full of
-steaming soapy linen, which Mrs. Sherman,
-bare armed and draggled, pushed
-down once in a while with a broom-handle.</p>
-
-<p>“There!” said Mrs. Sherman, “well!
-my sakes, Miss Wharton, it do do me
-good to see you. Look at that there
-girl!”</p>
-
-<p>Nellie sunk her head on her breast and
-began to cry. Sara was instantly seri<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_225" id="Page_225">[225]</a></span>ous.
-“Is anything wrong?” she said
-gravely.</p>
-
-<p>“Wrong!” cried Mrs. Sherman
-shrilly. “Well, I guess! I told her I’d
-keep her till you come home, though
-she’s a shame to any decent woman.
-My! what I’ve put up with for that
-there child!” She put her apron over
-her head, sobbing and vociferating: “I
-told her I’d tell you. I ain’t let her out
-of that door since. I’ll keep her straight
-now, as long as <em>I</em> live”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>Nellie, her face drawn and pale, sat
-plucking at the fringe of the shawl about
-her shoulders, her sullen lips compressed,
-her eyes cast resolutely down.</p>
-
-<p>“Nellie?” Sara said. There was no
-answer.</p>
-
-<p>“What has happened, Nellie?”</p>
-
-<p>Silence.</p>
-
-<p>“Tell me; I won’t be hard on you,
-Nellie. Have you&mdash;gone wrong again?”</p>
-
-<p>Nellie crossed her feet and made no
-reply.</p>
-
-<p>In despair Sara turned again to Mrs.
-Sherman, who, with tears, declaring first
-that Nellie should leave her house that<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_226" id="Page_226">[226]</a></span>
-night, and then that she would never let
-her out of her sight, told the shameful
-fact of another fall;&mdash;another reformation.</p>
-
-<p>“She’s sick, that’s what’s the matter;
-that’s all her reformin’ amounts to,” the
-aunt said; “she was bleedin’ from her
-lungs, so she come home. She was gone
-a week. It was two weeks last Thursday
-she come back. Well, I thought she was
-dyin’. I was up with her three nights.
-I sent for that there doctor at the dispensary.
-He give her some stuff. That’s it
-in the bottle on the mantel. Well, I
-didn’t let on to him how she’d been
-carryin’ on! Shame on her! I’m done
-with her. She can go out to the gutter.
-That’s where she belongs”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, Mrs. Sherman,” Sara protested,
-her color coming and going. “Nellie,
-how could you! oh, Nellie!” She looked
-over at the girl with a sort of passionate
-disappointment and pity, yet with that
-physical shrinking which the good woman
-feels in the presence of the bad woman.
-With illness Nellie’s vanity had ebbed;
-she was untidy, her hands were dirty;<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_227" id="Page_227">[227]</a></span>
-she had not frizzed her hair for days,
-and it hung about her dull face in lifeless
-strands.</p>
-
-<p>“Well,” Mrs. Sherman burst out,
-“there! She’s broke my heart. Nellie,
-it’s time for your medicine. She ain’t
-got no appetite, Miss Wharton. I don’t
-know what I <em>shall</em> do!” The woman’s
-worn face quivered with tears. Nellie
-got up and took her medicine; she
-glanced at the hem of Miss Wharton’s
-skirt, but would not lift her eyes any
-higher. The clothes on the stove boiled,
-and the suds splashed over and sizzled
-on the hot iron. Mrs. Sherman, talking
-and crying, rammed them down with the
-clothes-stick.</p>
-
-<p>“I couldn’t believe it at first. She’d
-kep’ straight for more ’an a year an’ a
-half. But she got to goin’ with a lot o’
-them fast girls, and she spent every cent
-she had on her back”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>Sara looked around suddenly. “Did
-she give you a present of a chair at
-Christmas?”</p>
-
-<p>“A chair? No; she never gave me
-nothing. Not a thing. You told her<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_228" id="Page_228">[228]</a></span>
-she’d got to pay me board. I’d ’a’ been
-satisfied with that, and not ’a’ wanted no
-presents of chairs. Well, I took her out
-of her dyin’ mother’s arms, and I’ve
-lived to see the day I wished she’d a-died
-then, with my poor, blessed sister. <em>She</em>
-made a misstep, I will say; and the man
-made off and left her. But she was expectin’
-to marry him. It was different
-from this one. <em>I’ve</em> been a respectable
-woman all my life, and I can’t stand the
-shame of this,&mdash;the neighbors’ll know,”
-she rambled on, crying and jabbing at
-the steaming clothes, and looking with
-furtive, dumb love at the little, sick, mean
-face on the other side of the stove.</p>
-
-<p>As for Sara Wharton, she went home
-heart-sick, but gathering up her courage
-and her faith for further effort; this time
-to save the body as well as the soul.</p>
-
-<p>The first thing to be done was, plainly,
-to see the doctor at the dispensary, who
-had already examined Nellie.</p>
-
-<p>“I’ll have to tell him the truth about
-her,” Sara thought, frowning. But it
-never occurred to her to shirk this.</p>
-
-<p>“Yes, I remember the case, I think,”<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_229" id="Page_229">[229]</a></span>
-said Dr. Morse; “incipient phthisis, I
-believe. Just let me look it up; yes, that
-was it; anæmia, also; I gave her a tonic.”</p>
-
-<p>“Phthisis?” Sara repeated, her color
-paling. “Oh, Dr. Morse, doesn’t that
-mean&mdash;consumption?”</p>
-
-<p>“Not yet,” he answered, with all the
-cheerfulness of scientific indifference.
-“It will doubtless develop into consumption.”</p>
-
-<p>“But that means she will <em>die</em>?” Sara
-said, her dark eyes full of fear. “Oh, is
-it as bad as that?” Her lip trembled.
-The young man looked at her with attention.</p>
-
-<p>“I am sorry I told you so abruptly; I
-did not realize that the young woman
-was anything to you, personally; and I
-assure you the case is not hopeless.”</p>
-
-<p>“Is there any hope? Oh, Dr. Morse,
-it is so awful to think of her dying <em>now</em>!
-What must be done? How uneven
-things are! There was I, a strong, well
-woman, down in Florida, and this poor
-girl”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“There is perhaps some difference in
-the value of the two lives,” the doctor<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_230" id="Page_230">[230]</a></span>
-objected, smiling. Sara brushed this
-aside as unworthy of an answer.</p>
-
-<p>“What can we do?”</p>
-
-<p>“Well, I suppose if she could go away
-into the country, and live a quiet, regular
-life, with plenty of milk to drink, and
-plenty of fresh air and proper exercise,
-she would at least be greatly benefited.
-Possibly cured. There are no marked
-lesions, I think, in the lung.”</p>
-
-<p>Sara listened with frowning intentness;
-then she drew a long breath of
-relief. “I am so thankful that it is not
-hopeless. But I think that&mdash;that in
-prescribing for her, I mean planning for
-her, you ought to know&mdash;all there is to
-know, about her.”</p>
-
-<p>“Yes, that is advisable,” the doctor
-agreed easily. The charming color of her
-cheek, the bunch of violets on her shoulder,
-her beautiful, troubled brown eyes,
-were not lost upon this young man. “I
-thought her a vain little thing,” he went
-on, “and rather brutal to the good woman
-who was taking care of her. But illness
-makes us all selfish.”</p>
-
-<p>“I am afraid she is vain, poor child,”<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_231" id="Page_231">[231]</a></span>
-Sara said, “and selfish, too, rather. But
-the worst of it is, she has&mdash;she has not
-been good, Dr. Morse.”</p>
-
-<p>“Ah!” said the young man.</p>
-
-<p>“I did hope she had reformed, but
-while I was away&mdash;it happened again.”</p>
-
-<p>“I see. I see.”</p>
-
-<p>“Of course, in sending her away that
-has to be considered. She must be
-among people who will do her good.”</p>
-
-<p>“And to whom she will not do harm.”</p>
-
-<p>Sara looked a little startled. “Of
-course; but I had not thought of that.”</p>
-
-<p>“It seems to me that is very important,”
-he said, smiling. “Speaking of
-sending people away, I wish I might tell
-you of another case which needs the
-country; or are your hands too full to
-consider any one else?”</p>
-
-<p>“Alas, it is my purse which is not
-full,” she said ruefully; “but is it very
-bad?”</p>
-
-<p>“It is a poor soul, a hard-working,
-honest little creature, who has an old
-mother and an imbecile brother to support;
-and she’s nearly at an end of her
-strength. She needs to be braced up.”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_232" id="Page_232">[232]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>“I wish I could send her away too,”
-Sara said pitifully; “but I’ve begged
-and begged for my cases until, positively,
-I haven’t the face to ask for any more
-money. My friends fly when they see
-me approaching, for fear I’m going to
-say ‘give, give!’” She laughed a little,
-and the doctor looked at her with critical
-amusement.</p>
-
-<p>“But of the two, you’d give the&mdash;you’d
-give Nellie Sherman the chance
-for health?”</p>
-
-<p>“Why, it’s only ‘bracing up’ that
-your poor woman needs,” Sara said, with
-a surprised look, “and you say Nellie will
-die if she doesn’t go away?”</p>
-
-<p>“Perhaps that would be the best thing
-that could happen.”</p>
-
-<p>“Dr. Morse! Would you have me let
-Nellie Sherman <em>die</em>, that three people
-should be made comfortable?”</p>
-
-<p>“I would, indeed,” he said, with a
-whimsical smile.</p>
-
-<p>She looked at him in silent dismay,
-and he thought she shrank a little.</p>
-
-<p>“My dear Miss Wharton,” he said
-quickly, “just look at the situation:<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_233" id="Page_233">[233]</a></span>
-your poor Nellie is a moral leper; she is
-a contagion; she’s had her opportunity
-to get well (I speak spiritually); she has
-had a year and a half of the most patient
-and earnest effort expended upon her;
-but she hasn’t profited by it, and the
-probability is she is incurable. On the
-other hand, here is a woman who is a
-centre and source of moral health. Each
-needs physical restoration: one for her
-life, the other for her usefulness,&mdash;and,
-later, no doubt, her life, too. To which
-shall the chance be given?”</p>
-
-<p>“To the one who might die!” Sara
-said impetuously.</p>
-
-<p>She got up to go, a sparkle of indignation
-in her eyes; the young man rose,
-too, and stood leaning back against his
-office table, his hands in his pockets, and
-a good-natured smile on his lean, strong
-face. “I don’t see,” his visitor went on,
-“how you dare to say any soul is incurably
-bad”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“I only said the <em>probability</em> was that
-your Nellie was incurable; and, after all,
-if you have only a certain amount of
-medicine, will you give it to the mori<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_234" id="Page_234">[234]</a></span>bund
-or the person who is just coming
-down with an illness?”</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t think the illustration is good,”
-Sara answered loftily; “we are speaking
-of souls. And we have no right to say
-we know the limit”&mdash;her voice fell a
-little&mdash;“of God’s power.”</p>
-
-<p>Dr. Morse looked as though he were
-about to speak, but apparently thought
-better of it.</p>
-
-<p>“I’m very sorry for your poor woman,”
-Sara said, “and I’ll try to see if I can’t
-arrange a little rest for her; but first of
-all, life must be saved.”</p>
-
-<p>Then she went away, her lip between
-her white teeth, and her breath quick.
-“Horrible man!” she said to herself,
-“the idea of reasoning about a thing like
-that&mdash;a human life! Dreadful person!
-I hope I shall never see him again.”</p>
-
-<p>Dr. Morse, in his office, thrust his hands
-down into his pockets, and stretched his
-feet out, and reflected. “I suppose she
-thinks I’m a brute. I might have known
-better than to talk to a sentimental girl
-as though she were a rational being.
-She’ll keep that creature alive long<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_235" id="Page_235">[235]</a></span>
-enough to bring two or three fellows
-down to the gutter, and, possibly, even
-continue her physical and moral characteristics
-in a child (though that’s not
-likely, thank heaven), and then feel that
-she’s done <em>her</em> duty! Good Lord, the
-harm these philanthropists do!”</p>
-
-<p>Nevertheless he softened a little when
-a short and formal note came from Miss
-Wharton, with a small sum of money for
-“the case of which he had spoken.”</p>
-
-<p>“She’s got a good heart, that girl,”
-he told himself. “Her ten dollars won’t
-do much, though; and to think of that
-little squalid Nellie Sherman having a
-hundred spent to keep her worthless
-body alive!”</p>
-
-
-<h3>V</h3>
-
-<p>So Nellie’s summer outing was arranged:
-she was to have four months in
-a quiet place in the country; plenty of
-fresh air, and good milk, and wholesome
-food.</p>
-
-<p>No wonder the little pale cheeks grew
-round and faintly pink; that her eyes
-seemed darker and brighter; her pinched,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_236" id="Page_236">[236]</a></span>
-white lips fuller and redder. In a month
-it was evident that the quiet life which
-Sara had taken such pains to find was
-good for her; her whole miserable, sickly
-body began to thrive. It was a “quiet”
-life. From the girl’s point of view it was
-perfectly intolerable. She endured, in her
-way, the misery of the intellectual man
-or woman cut off absolutely from books
-or study of any kind, or of a clean person
-obliged to live in filth. The contrast
-was as great. The fact that it was
-in favor of righteousness did not make
-it any the less painful. Nellie’s sudden
-removal from the cheap and base excitements
-of her life caused absolute suffering.
-Such suffering, untempted reformers
-argue, is good for the soul.</p>
-
-<p>But to Nellie the sweet drift of silent
-summer days was maddeningly dull; she
-brooded over what she felt was the hardship
-of her lot, and looked back upon her
-Mercer life as a time of freedom, and of a
-strange sort of importance,&mdash;which was
-as near self-respect as she could come.
-At least, in Mercer she was not “trod
-on,” as she now felt herself to be; she<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_237" id="Page_237">[237]</a></span>
-could go and walk the street on fine afternoons
-with the Caligan girls, three
-abreast, arm in arm, strutting and jostling
-each other, and looking into the
-shop windows; laughing loudly, or glancing
-haughtily at the passers-by, or giggling
-at “gentlemen friends.” It was all
-so harmless and so pleasant! Of course,
-Mrs. Smith’s on Baker Street, that was
-different; but just to meet lady and gentlemen
-friends, and talk and “carry on”&mdash;what
-was wrong in that? She did, to
-be sure, feel nervous about her health;
-but if it were necessary to go into the
-country, why couldn’t she have gone
-to a hotel, where she could have had
-some fun? It seemed a cruel life to
-Nellie! She came to feel toward Sara
-Wharton, instead of the uncomfortable
-resentment which in such natures takes
-the place of gratitude, a venomous hatred.
-Sara seemed to this poor, mean soul, a
-powerful enemy, one who interfered with
-every joy, and, not content with that,
-who “talked;” and Nellie hated talk.
-Like most of her class, except when in
-a rage, she had little to say beyond ex<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_238" id="Page_238">[238]</a></span>clamations,
-and Miss Wharton’s impetuous
-flow of words, her entreaties, and
-rebukes, and suggestions, had only bewildered
-and irritated the girl; for Sara,
-like most of her class, had never taken
-Nellie’s mental deficiencies into account;
-she treated her always like a rational being.
-Like a “Soul,” Sara herself would
-have said.</p>
-
-<p>So, up on the farm, as her fright about
-her health subsided, poor Nellie raged
-against her benefactor and her cruel fate.
-She fell into fits of weeping, or, what was
-worse to the quiet husband and wife in
-whose charge she was, into long silences,
-broken only by fitful flashes of black
-temper. Yet in spite of this, her bodily
-health increased. Very likely there
-would have been open rebellion, and a
-break for liberty by midsummer, if an
-unexpected interest had not come into
-her life. Two students, with their tutor,
-came to camp out near the farm; and
-after passing them once or twice in the
-road, and giggling with them over the
-posting of a letter in the office, poor Nellie
-grew better tempered. She frizzed her<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_239" id="Page_239">[239]</a></span>
-hair with keener enjoyment, and practiced
-airs and graces before her glass all
-the long hot forenoons; and in the afternoons
-walked in to the village on the remote
-chance of meeting the two boys.
-She did not see them often, but to know
-they were near gave her something to
-think about in the deadly monotony of
-farm life, and she was much happier. On
-the rare occasions of their meeting she
-would roll her eyes, and talk in her simpering,
-nasal voice of the weather, or the
-novel she had been reading, or how her
-“guardian” had sent her into the country
-for her health. The boys said to
-each other that she was pretty, and ripping
-good fun; and used to laugh over
-her silliness with their tutor. They were
-too busy and too wholesomely happy to
-give very much thought to her.</p>
-
-<p>Thus the summer passed. The health
-which Sara Wharton so earnestly desired
-had returned, temporarily at least. When
-at last the first of September came, and
-Miss Wharton’s letter arrived to say she
-might come home,&mdash;such a gentle,
-friendly, sympathetic letter,&mdash;Nellie was<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_240" id="Page_240">[240]</a></span>
-wild with delight. She could hardly remember
-to say good-by to the kind people
-who had looked after her for the
-last few months; she almost forgot the
-boys; she was tremulous with joy.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, I’m so <em>glad</em> to go back&mdash;oh, I
-hate, hate, <em>hate</em> the country!” she kept
-saying; while the husband and wife
-looked at each other wonderingly.</p>
-
-<p>So, strengthened and invigorated, panting
-for excitement, unchecked by any
-moral perceptions, by gratitude, by love,
-even by fear (now that she was well
-again),&mdash;she came back to Mercer.</p>
-
-
-<h3>VI</h3>
-
-<p>One night in December, Sara Wharton,
-coming home from a dinner, was told
-that Dr. Morse was waiting for her in
-the library. She went in at once, pulling
-off her long gloves, and with her white
-cloak falling back from her pretty shoulders.
-She had not seen the doctor since
-that talk about Nellie, and she had forgotten
-her indignation with him. She
-had heard too much of his goodness<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_241" id="Page_241">[241]</a></span>
-among the poor people to harbor resentment.</p>
-
-<p>“Oh, I am so sorry to be so late,” she
-said. “Have you been waiting very
-long? Oh, this room is cold! Why
-haven’t they kept the fire up?” She
-turned, with a pretty, hospitable impulse
-to summon a servant, but Dr. Morse
-stopped her with a gesture.</p>
-
-<p>“I am quite warm. I will only detain
-you for a few moments. I want you to
-help me.”</p>
-
-<p>“Indeed, I will; has anything gone
-wrong?”</p>
-
-<p>“Yes,” he said, with a hard look.</p>
-
-<p>“One of your poor people?” she asked.
-She sat down by the fire, one silken foot
-on the fender; her cloak had slipped
-down behind her, and she was pulling
-out her gloves, and smoothing them on
-her knee. She looked up at him with a
-charming smile.</p>
-
-<p>“Yes,” he said, “one of my poor people&mdash;and
-yours. Miss Wharton, can
-you tell me anything about Nellie Sherman?”</p>
-
-<p>“Nellie?” Sara Wharton’s face began<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_242" id="Page_242">[242]</a></span>
-to change. “Oh, Dr. Morse, I wish I
-could tell you anything encouraging
-about her. She quarreled with her aunt,
-and went to work at a factory in North
-Mercer. She hardly ever comes home,
-I’m sorry to say; she is boarding with a
-respectable family, I believe, and I think
-she does not depend on Mrs. Sherman
-for any money. But I’ve lost my hold
-on her&mdash;if I ever had any! She has
-only been to see me once since she came
-home in September. You know I sent
-her away in the summer? And she got
-well, Dr. Morse!” she ended triumphantly.</p>
-
-<p>“Yes; she did,” he said with stern
-significance.</p>
-
-<p>“What is the matter? Is she sick
-again? is she&mdash;<em>dead</em>?”</p>
-
-<p>“Dead? I wish she were.”</p>
-
-<p>“Dr. Morse!”</p>
-
-<p>“Miss Wharton, that miserable creature
-has lived long enough to corrupt and
-seduce an innocent boy. Young Jack
-Hayes has&mdash;I beg your pardon, this is
-plain talk&mdash;but I am a physician and
-you are&mdash;a philanthropist, so we need<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_243" id="Page_243">[243]</a></span>
-not mince words,&mdash;Jack has gone off
-with her. I have come to-night from his
-mother’s bedside. Mrs. Hayes has just
-heard what he has done&mdash;her innocent
-boy.”</p>
-
-<p>Sara rose, shrinking and wincing as
-though he had struck her.</p>
-
-<p>“I thought it possible,” he went on,
-“that you might know where she was
-living, and perhaps I could get on her
-track. She met Jack up in the country;
-he was there with a tutor; of course, she
-had no difficulty in finding him when he
-came back to town. He went off with
-her on Sunday, we think&mdash;at least, one
-of the Clay boys saw him with her Sunday
-night, and he hasn’t been at home
-since.”</p>
-
-<p>“I don’t know where she is,” Sara
-said brokenly.</p>
-
-<p>“I went to see Mrs. Sherman before I
-came here, and do you know what she
-said to me? She sat, poor woman, with
-the tears streaming down her cheeks:
-‘Oh,’ she said, ‘if I could only know she
-was dead! If she was just safe in her
-grave!’”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_244" id="Page_244">[244]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>Sara shivered.</p>
-
-<p>“I thought to myself, ‘She would be,
-you poor soul, if some of us wise people
-had not interfered.’ I reproach myself,”
-he went on savagely, “that I did not try
-to dissuade you when you told me you
-meant to keep the girl alive. We ought
-to stamp such vermin out&mdash;or let it die
-out, at least. Instead, you philanthropists
-and we doctors do all we can to
-keep them alive,&mdash;that they may propagate
-their kind! Fortunately, nature
-generally prevents that,&mdash;but Nellie’s
-mother was a fallen woman, you may remember?
-Poor Jack&mdash;poor Mrs. Hayes!
-Miss Wharton, our hands are not innocent
-of that boy’s blood.”</p>
-
-<p>Sara was very white; she still trembled,
-but she lifted her head and looked
-full at him. “Dr. Morse, are you God,
-to kill?”</p>
-
-<p>“Or you, to make alive?” he interrupted.
-“I did not ask you to kill&mdash;I
-asked you not to interfere&mdash;to allow
-God to work in his own way. I asked
-you to use that judgment which, in ordinary
-affairs, is so excellent&mdash;to consider<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_245" id="Page_245">[245]</a></span>
-<em>probabilities</em>; you do as much as that in
-refusing to leave a lighted candle in a powder
-magazine. What would you think of
-me, if I turned a smallpox patient loose
-in a crowd? Nellie is far more dangerous
-than smallpox. Don’t you see&mdash;surely
-you must see! that it would have
-been better for the community if she had
-died last summer?”</p>
-
-<p>“Better for the community,” Sara said
-passionately; “but what about Nellie?
-Would it have been better for Nellie?”</p>
-
-<p>“It could hardly be worse, could it?”
-he answered dryly; “but if it were worse,
-better one lost soul than two or three.”</p>
-
-<p>“God doesn’t lose souls so easily,” she
-cried; but he pressed the logic of her
-hope home.</p>
-
-<p>“Then why not have trusted Him, and
-let her die? Death isn’t the worst thing
-in the world! And may I remind you”&mdash;they
-had both risen; and from a cruel
-sort of justice on his part, and a horrified
-dismay on hers, anger was arising in their
-eyes&mdash;“may I remind you of a poor
-woman of whom I spoke that day you
-came to see me about Nellie? She is in<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_246" id="Page_246">[246]</a></span>
-the hospital, broken down absolutely;
-her brother is in the almshouse, and her
-mother living on charity. But Nellie
-Sherman, a thief, a liar, a prostitute, a
-moral imbecile, is in good health!”</p>
-
-<p>“You have no right to say such
-things,” Sara said, in a low voice. “I
-had to give that poor creature a chance
-to save her soul; and to do that I had to
-save her body”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“And ruin Jack&mdash;body and soul”&mdash;</p>
-
-<p>“That was not my business,” she flung
-back at him.</p>
-
-<p>“It was your business!” he said. “It
-was your business to weigh probabilities.
-Oh!” he ended, impetuously, “the trouble
-with us is, nowadays, that we make
-too much of <em>life</em>, and too little of <em>living</em>.
-It is living that is important, not existing!
-I tell you, Miss Wharton, there is only a
-limited amount of power in the world;
-only a limited amount of opportunity, or
-of money, for that matter; and we are
-bound to put power and opportunity and
-money where they will do the most good!
-Did you put them where they would do
-the most good?”</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_247" id="Page_247">[247]</a></span></p>
-
-<p>Sara flinched, then rallied all her faith.
-“Dr. Morse, I did the duty which came
-to my hands; I had no choice.”</p>
-
-<p>“No choice?” he repeated. “There
-is always choice! that’s where responsibility
-comes in. The good woman and
-the bad woman may not come and stand
-hand in hand before you, each asking aid.
-But the good woman, abstractly, is always
-dying (or&mdash;being tempted to turn
-into a bad woman, for that matter!), so
-there is always choice. We’ve got to
-consider moral economics; we’ve no
-business to gratify our selfish sentimentalism
-at the expense of society!” He
-was so much in earnest that he did not
-see how tensely she was holding herself,
-or what a look of terror had come into
-her young face.</p>
-
-<p>“The Gospel of Love is all I can
-plead,” she said, in the voice of one insisting
-to herself; “but it is the salvation
-of the world!”</p>
-
-<p>All the stern anxiety of his face melted
-into an exaltation as intense as her own.
-“Law is the salvation of the world!
-And law means that the good of the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_248" id="Page_248">[248]</a></span>
-whole, not the comfort of the individual,
-shall be considered; it means a love so
-sane as to permit the mercy of death.”</p>
-
-<p>Sara put her hands over her face to
-hide a burst of tears. Her accuser ground
-his teeth in helpless discomfort.</p>
-
-<p>“I’m right,” he said doggedly, “but
-I’m a brute; I wish you would forgive
-me.”</p>
-
-<p>She turned from him, unable to speak.
-He wanted to follow her, to comfort her;
-to say, as one does to a child or a woman,
-“Never mind,”&mdash;but he dared not.</p>
-
-<p>“I’m sorry I’ve wounded you,” he
-said again miserably; “I hope you will
-forgive me?”</p>
-
-<p>“Forgive you?” she turned and faced
-him, the tears on her face; “I haven’t
-anything to forgive. Do you suppose I
-care how you talk to <em>me</em>?&mdash;if I am right?
-oh, <em>if</em> I am right!”</p>
-
-
-<hr class="chap pg-brk" />
-
-<p class="p6 pfs120 antiqua">The Riverside Press</p>
-
-<p class="pfs80">CAMBRIDGE, MASSACHUSETTS, U. S. A.<br />
-ELECTROTYPED AND PRINTED BY<br />
-H. O. HOUGHTON AND CO.</p>
-<p class="p6" />
-
-<hr class="chap pg-brk" />
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-<pre>
-
-
-
-
-
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