diff options
| author | nfenwick <nfenwick@pglaf.org> | 2025-01-27 13:10:07 -0800 |
|---|---|---|
| committer | nfenwick <nfenwick@pglaf.org> | 2025-01-27 13:10:07 -0800 |
| commit | 05c874b5e185040a60aed257530c8d2568341e62 (patch) | |
| tree | 617d1dbb2fe55fcd34a2a19ca81c26a3aed542eb /old/60523-0.txt | |
| parent | 248076ccf92de8d9302c66e1598680a243fbff52 (diff) | |
Diffstat (limited to 'old/60523-0.txt')
| -rw-r--r-- | old/60523-0.txt | 7432 |
1 files changed, 0 insertions, 7432 deletions
diff --git a/old/60523-0.txt b/old/60523-0.txt deleted file mode 100644 index 4835e3a..0000000 --- a/old/60523-0.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,7432 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Torch-Bearers, by George Kelly - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and -most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms -of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll -have to check the laws of the country where you are located before using -this ebook. - - - -Title: The Torch-Bearers - A Satirical Comedy in Three Acts - -Author: George Kelly - -Release Date: October 19, 2019 [EBook #60523] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: UTF-8 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE TORCH-BEARERS *** - - - - -Produced by Tim Lindell, David E. Brown, Buley Library -(Southern Connecticut State University) and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -book was produced from images made available by the -HathiTrust Digital Library.) - - - - - - - - - -THE TORCH-BEARERS - - - - - “There will be actresses when husbands are a thing of the past.” - - --_Mrs. Pampinelli._ - - - - - THE TORCH-BEARERS - - _A Satirical Comedy - in_ - THREE ACTS - - - _By_ GEORGE KELLY - - [Illustration] - - _Preface by_ - KENNETH MACGOWAN - - - [Illustration] - - - NEW YORK - AMERICAN LIBRARY SERVICE - 1923 - - - - - _Copyright 1923_ - AMERICAN LIBRARY SERVICE - _All Rights Reserved._ - - - - -“The Torch-Bearers,” by George Kelly, was presented by Stewart and -French for the first time on any stage at the Savoy Theatre, Asbury -Park, New Jersey, on the night of Monday, August 14, 1922, with the -following cast: - - - MR. FREDERICK RITTER MR. ARTHUR SHAW - MR. HUXLEY HOSSEFROSSE MR. DOUGLAS GARDEN - MR. SPINDLER MR. EDWARD REESE - MR. RALPH TWILLER MR. BOOTH HOWARD - TEDDY SPEARING MR. WILLIAM CASTLE - MR. STAGE MANAGER MR. J. A. CURTIS - MRS. PAULA RITTER MISS MARY BOLAND - MRS. J. DURO PAMPINELLI MISS ALISON SKIPWORTH - MRS. NELLY FELL MISS HELEN LOWELL - MISS FLORENCE MCCRICKETT MISS ROSE MARY KING - MRS. CLARA SHEPPARD MISS DAISY ATHERTON - JENNY MISS MARY GILDEA - -Play staged by the Author - - - NOTE-- - - The form of the present manuscript is exactly that in which this play - was presented during its run at the Vanderbilt Theatre, New York - City, New York. - - --_The Author._ - - - - - THE TORCH-BEARERS - - - CAST - - MR. FREDERICK RITTER - MR. HUXLEY HOSSEFROSSE - MR. SPINDLER - MR. RALPH TWILLER - TEDDY SPEARING - MR. STAGE MANAGER - MRS. PAULA RITTER (_Ritter’s wife_) - MRS. J. DURO PAMPINELLI - MRS. NELLY FELL - MISS FLORENCE MCCRICKETT - MRS. CLARA SHEPPARD - JENNY (_a housemaid at Ritter’s_) - - - SCENE - - ACT I--A kind of drawing-room in the home of Frederick Ritter, on an - evening in October, about 8 o’clock. - - ACT II--Behind the scenes at Horticultural Hall, the following - evening at 8:30. - - ACT III--The drawing-room at Ritter’s, two hours later. - - - - -Stage, screen and amateur rights for the production of this play -are controlled by the author, George Kelly, 3665 Midvale Avenue, -Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. No public readings or performances may be -given without his written consent. - - - - -PREFACE - - -I cannot remember if it was one of those torrid and terrible nights of -August when the chain-gang of New York’s critics was tolled off to the -Forty-Eighth Street Theatre for the première of _The Torch-Bearers_. -But I do know that the general atmosphere of oppression--physical, -mental, professional--was a little denser than usual. In the first -twenty-eight days of August, 1922, managements too daring or too -resourceless to wait for September had deluged us with a steady stream -of inanity, and here was another dousing in prospect. If it wasn’t -the heat, it was certainly the humidity of theatrical August. Unknown -play, new producers, author’s name vaguely connected with vaudeville; -altogether a production so little esteemed by the booking powers that -it had to slip into a few weeks before the Equity Players began their -season at this theatre. It could have been a night of Elysian coolness, -and still we would have been expecting the worst. It could have been -mid-April, and still we should have found an almost ineffable freshness -in the breeze of George Kelly’s little comedy. - -The cold, historical fact is that at about 9:15 o’clock on the evening -of August 29th, 1922, five or six hundred average New Yorkers, two or -three hundred friends of the management, and about fifty sophisticated -first-nighters were in grave danger of rolling off their seats in -hysteria because of _The Torch-Bearers_. - -The intermissions were filled with three questions which more or less -concern the reader of the published play. Who was George Kelly? Where -did he get the comedy? How would it go? - -On August 29th, 1922, George Kelly was a perfectly good Philadelphian -in his late twenties who was much better known to vaudeville than to -fame. He had written, directed, and played in about a dozen one-act -comedies and dramas on Keith and Orpheum time. He had begun by quitting -his family’s private tutor to try acting in a playlet by the late Paul -Armstrong. Then--with no more preparation, apparently--he had begun -to write his own vehicles. A certain drama in France absorbed his -attentions for a while. After that more “sketches”--as the vaudeville -powers call any effort above vocal or bodily acrobatics--and suddenly a -play. - -The origin of _The Torch-Bearers_ was simple enough. Kelly wrote the -kind of tight, effective short plays that amateur actors and little -theatre directors are always looking for. He had a perfectly good -Philadelphia family behind him. And so he was being invited to lunch -every now and then by the Pampinellis of the cities in which he played. -To hear them was enough. They had to live a wider life. - -_The Torch-Bearers_ passed a prosperous term on Broadway, and I think -it will go far in the little theatres which it satirizes. But upon the -opening night I remember much dubious debate about its chances. We -had laughed ourselves almost literally sick, and at the end of the -second intermission we had not yet seen the rather prosy last act. -Yet--conscious of our personal superiority--we wondered.... Brander -Matthews and Aristotle would scoff at it, George M. Cohan and Professor -Baker would scowl. _The Torch-Bearers_ broke all the rules, and it had -no plot. Obviously, by all the rules, it ought to fail. - -There may be a good many reasons why it didn’t, and some may lead you -far into aesthetic explorations of the present breakdown of dramatic -form all over the world. But the reader will find more cogent reasons -in the pages that follow this introduction. Personally, I should put -it down to the fact that the character-study of the first act and the -hokum of the second are irresistible. We have all met our Pampinellis, -and we have all seen the lady prompter take a curtain call, or had -our mustache fall off in the big scene. We can never resist some -characterization on the stage, and as for such hokum as this record of -all the mishaps of the amateur actor, ill luck is the heart of broad -comedy and when ill luck comes where it is most painful--in personal -display--Cassandra herself must smile. - -There were other things to make the death-watch wonder whether _The -Torch Bearers_ could live. It was satire. Satire is not ordinarily a -popular commodity in the theatre. It defeats sympathy, and sympathy is -necessary to emotion, and emotion to theatrical success. - -Satire has had its great moments, however, in the history of the drama. -Aristophanes made merry over the fashions, foibles, and philosophies of -Athens. Satire was Molière’s stock in trade. Shaw has done very well by -poking a finger at society. Every nation has at least one outstanding -theatrical satire to its credit. But for the war, the wise of Paris -might still be laughing at the French Academy because of de Flers and -de Caillavet’s _L’Habit Vert_. England has _The School for Scandal_, -as Ireland has _The Playboy_ and _John Bull’s Other Island_. Germany, -though a little heavy in the theatre, can still point to Schnitzler’s -_Literature_. - -Just at the moment America is beginning to display a surprising -fondness for theatrical satire. Beginning is hardly the word, perhaps, -for the first American drama, _The Contrast_, lampooned society with -a large “S”; _Fashion_, our first play by a woman, spoke out smartly -against the smart world, and from _Our American Cousin_ down to date, -so many of our playwrights have spoofed the alien and the aristocratic -for the benefit of the homespun, that it is only by a hair that I can -risk the statement that it is a “surprising fondness” which we now -display for satire. America has always enjoyed its irreverent moments -in the theatre, but it has seldom gone in for whole plays devoted to -almost nothing but lampooning. - -In the last three seasons, however, the distinctly satirical play has -climbed noticeably in favour. In 1919-20 there was nothing of the -kind to be seen on Broadway. In 1920-21 came Porter Emerson Browne’s -Mexican melodrama, _The Bad Man_, with most of its success due to sly -digs at both sides of the international line, and George M. Cohan’s -joke at the expense of audiences as well as playwrights, _The Tavern_. -Last season, playgoers good-humoredly made a satire out of the deadly -serious absurdities of the British melodrama, _Bulldog Drummond_; the -_Chauve-Souris_ twitted Russian drama a little--in Russian; and the -firm of Kaufman and Connelly began in _Dulcy_ and _To the Ladies!_ to -vend biting wit at the expense of scenario writers and advertisers, -efficiency experts and after-dinner speakers. - -This season a perfect flood of satire broke upon us, most of it very -good indeed, and some of it destined to be successful with a large -public. Besides _The Torch-Bearers_, there have been _R. U. R._, grim -sarcasm upon labour and capital, and a new bill of the _Chauve-Souris_, -the Kaufman-Connelly version of Henry Leon Wilson’s _Merton of the -Movies_, _Six Characters in Search of an Author_, from the Italian, and -_The World We Live In_, the insect comedy from the Czecho-Slovak. - -The future of _The Torch-Bearers_, now that its Broadway career is -over, brings us up against the little theatre movement. I am very much -in favor of that odd and amazing phenomenon. I believe a great deal of -the promise of the American stage outside New York and a surprising -amount of its present accomplishment in that metropolis, is due to the -uncontrollable desire of people not so very unlike Mrs. Pampinelli to -produce plays. Kelly’s satire touches the lower fringes of what Mrs. -P. calls “the movement,” but it might be directed at Maurice Browne, -Sam Hume, and Irving Pichel and the little theatre would still go on, -and _The Torch-Bearers_ would become--as I am sure it will--one of the -most popular pieces in the repertory of the amateur actor. Many a Mrs. -Pampinelli, safe in the sense of her own self-importance, will do for -_The Torch-Bearers_ all that Mrs. P. did--which is, as Kelly observes, -to “tell the players where to go on the stage, so they won’t be running -into each other.” - -But there is art in this play--not mere observation--and I am afraid -none of the Pampinellis who are to be concerned with its future will -ever quite equal the person that the author and Alison Skipworth, -the actress, created between them. I do not look for any moment so -extraordinary as when Mrs. Pampinelli, discussing the fatalities -invariably connected with these amateur performances, reaches her -peroration: “We are not dismayed; we have the lessons of history to -fortify us: for whenever the torch of essential culture has been -raised, (_she raises the lead-pencil as though it were a torch_) there -has unfailingly been the concomitant exactment of a human life.” For -one cannot expect to find a cuckoo-clock always present with its -sapient comment at such a moment. - -The reader will find the cuckoo-clock, the satire, and the hokum -for himself. He will also detect, I think, a strain of divine and -devilish madness in Kelly which promises something of genius for -the American drama. The reader may note, too, in Kelly’s script -the kind of practical qualification for the theatre of which Mr. -Ritter speaks feelingly on page 56. This qualification has produced -extraordinarily effective humor and something else. This is a sense -for stage management. It makes Kelly a rare and precious figure in -our theatre, and gives you a script to read--or to produce--that is -liberally supplied with every bit of business and direction necessary -for putting on the play--either in the Cohoes Little Theatre or your -own imagination. - - KENNETH MACGOWAN. - - Pelham Manor, N. Y., February 25, 1923. - - - - -NOTE: The drawing-room at Ritter’s, in which the first and last -acts are laid, is a comfortable-looking room, suggestive of good -circumstance. Toward the back there is a fancy wooden partition -separating the hallway from the room proper. This partition begins -rather high up on the side walls and curves deeply down to two -ornamental columns, five feet high and set about five feet apart, -forming the entrance from the hallway to the room. Straight out through -this entrance, and paralleling the partition, is the staircase, running -up to the left and through an arched doorway. The foot of the staircase -is just to the right of the center-door; and then the hallway continues -on out to the front door. On the left, there is a passageway between -the staircase and the partition, running through an arched doorway -to the body of the house. In the room proper, breaking the angle of -the right wall and the partition, is a door, opening out, and below -this door, a casement-window. On the left, breaking the angle of -the left wall and the partition, is the mantelpiece, and below it a -door, opening out. Just inside the partition, on either side of the -center-door, is a built-in seat. - -The entire room and hallway is done in a scheme of silver and the -lighter shades of green. All the woodwork and furniture, including the -piano and mantelpiece, is finished in silver-green, and the walls and -ceiling are in blended tones of orchid, gray and green, decorated with -tapestried panel-effects. The carpet is gray-green, and the vases and -clock on the mantelpiece, as well as the little cuckoo-clock over the -door at the left, are green. The drapes on the casement-window and the -doorways, at the head of the stairs and in the left hallway, are in -rose-colored brocaded satin; and the pads on the partition-seats are -covered with the same material. The piano-throw is a garishly subdued -blend of old-rose, Nile green and canary-colored silk. - -Right out between the little wooden columns of the center-door, set -flat against the staircase, is a small console-table, holding a most -beautiful rose-colored vase filled with wisteria; and on the piano -there is a similar vase filled with white and yellow blossoms. On -either side of the console-table there is a tall torchiere with a -rose-colored shade; and the shades on the wall-lights, and the one on -the lovely rose-colored vase-lamp on the table down at the right below -the casement-window, are all rose-colored. - -There’s a brilliant array of cushions about the room, all shapes and -sizes, and every color of the rainbow,--and many books and magazines. -The piano, up at the right, is littered with music, cigarettes, in a -fancy container, flowers and candy--in a pretty box made of pink satin. - -The two arm-chairs in the room, one just to the left of the table below -the window, and the other at the left side of the table over at the -left, are over-stuffed in green-and-silver brocade. - -There is a small table below the piano, with a light little chair -beside it, the left side, and there is a similar chair over at the -extreme left, below the door. - -The keyboard of the piano parallels the right wall, with enough room, -of course, between the piano-stool and wall to permit of easy use -of the door. There must also be room enough above the piano for a -passageway between it and the partition-seat. - -The rights and lefts employed in the foregoing descriptions are, of -course, the player’s rights and lefts. - - - - -ACT ONE. - - -_After a slight pause, a door out at the right is heard to close, and -immediately Mr. Ritter comes along the hallway beyond the partition -and into the room. He is a brisk, rather stocky type of man, in his -early forties, wearing a brown suit and overcoat, a derby hat, and -carrying a suit-case. He sets the suit-case down on the partition-seat -at the right, and, with a glance around the room, at the unusual -arrangement of the furniture, starts out into the hallway again, -removing his gloves and overcoat. He glances along the hallway to the -left and up the stairs as he goes. Jenny comes along the hallway from -the left carrying a small, light chair. As she is about to come into -the drawing-room proper from the hallway, she becomes conscious of Mr. -Ritter out at the hall-rack at the right. She stops and peers in that -direction. She is a pleasant little English person, plump and trim, -dressed in the regulation parlor-maid’s black and white._ - -JENNY. Is that you, Mr. Ritter? - -RITTER. That’s who it is, Jenny! How are you? - -JENNY. [_Bringing the little chair forward and placing it above the -little table at the left_] Pretty well, thanks, Mr. Ritter, how are -_you_? - -RITTER. [_Coming along the hallway from the right_] I’m whatever you -are, Jenny. [_Jenny gives a faint little laugh and proceeds with her -arrangements, and Ritter picks up several telegrams from the stand in -the hallway, just to the left of the center entrance._] - -JENNY. Ain’t you back a bit soon? - -RITTER. [_Coming forward to the small table at the right, below the -piano_] Yes, I thought I’d have to go down to Cincinnati for a week or -two, but I didn’t. - -JENNY. Mrs. Ritter ain’t expectin’ you, is she? - -RITTER. [_Glancing thru the telegrams_] No, she isn’t, Jenny. - -JENNY. I thought I didn’t remember hearin’ her sayin’ nothin’. - -RITTER. Where is she? - -JENNY. [_Starting for the hallway_] She’s upstairs, sir, I’ll call her. - -RITTER. [_With a glance at the furniture_] What are you doing around -here, Jenny, housecleaning? - -JENNY. [_Turning and coming back_] No, sir, there’s a rehearsal here -tonight. [_Ritter stops reading and looks at her quizzically for a -second._] - -RITTER. What kind of a rehearsal? - -JENNY. Why, a rehearsal for a show that Mrs. Ritter’s takin’ part in -tomorrow night. They done it at the Civic Club the week after you went -away, and they liked it so well they’re doin’ it again tomorrow night. - -RITTER. _Who_ liked it? - -JENNY. Sir? - -RITTER. I say, who liked it so well that they’re doing it again? - -JENNY. Why, everybody seemed to like it, Mr. Ritter, from what the -papers said. - -RITTER. What kind of a show is it? - -JENNY. Why, I think it’s a tragedy, from what I gather. - -RITTER. Did you see it, Jenny? - -JENNY. No, sir, _I_ didn’t get to see it, I’m sorry to say; but I heard -everybody connected with it sayin’ it was a _great success_. [_Ritter -resumes his telegrams, then looks at Jenny suddenly._] - -RITTER. How did Mrs. Ritter get into it? - -JENNY. Why, I think somebody died, Mr. Ritter, if I’m not mistaken. - -RITTER. [_Shaking his head conclusively, and resuming his telegram_] I -assumed it was an extremity of _some_ kind. - -MRS. R. [_At the top of the stairs at the back_] Fred Ritter! don’t -tell me that’s you down there! [_Jenny turns quickly and goes to the -foot of the stairs._] - -RITTER. No, I’m still out in Chicago! - -MRS. R. Is it, Jenny? - -JENNY. Yes, mam, I was just comin’ to tell you. - -MRS. R. [_Starting down the stairs_] I _thought_ I heard his voice! -[_Jenny laughs._] I’ve been standing up here for the last _five_ -minutes saying to myself, “Who can that _be_ that has a voice so -much like Fred’s!” [_Coming into the room from the hallway_] Why, -Fred, darling, what are you doing here! [_He has moved up towards the -center-door._] - -RITTER. [_Laughing a little_] How is the old kid! [_Kisses her_] - -MRS. R. I thought you wouldn’t be back till the first! [_Jenny passes -along the hallway to the left._] - -RITTER. Why, that Cincinnati thing’s been postponed till after -Thanksgiving. - -MRS. R. [_Turning away from him and stepping out into the hallway -again_] Well, why didn’t you wire or something? - -RITTER. I was afraid of giving you a shock. - -MRS. R. Oh, Jenny! - -RITTER. You’re such a frail little flower. - -MRS. R. [_Turning back to him_] Now stop, Fred! I’ve really lost a lot -since you went away. - -RITTER. How do you know? [_Jenny comes along the hallway from the -left._] - -MRS. R. Why, my dear, I can tell by my clothes. [_She turns to Jenny._] -Jenny, will you get me a glass of water, please. - -JENNY. [_Starting out_] Yes, mam. - -RITTER. You’re not going to faint, are you? - -MRS. R. [_Turning back to him again with a flip of her hand at him_] -No, I’m not. - -RITTER. [_Slipping his arm around her waist and coming forward_] Any -mail here for me? - -MRS. R. Not a single thing, Fred; I sent everything right on to -Chicago as soon as it came: there must be several letters there for you -now. - -RITTER. [_Disengaging himself and taking her hands and looking at her_] -I’ll get them all right. How have you been treating yourself while I’ve -been away? - -MRS. R. All right; only I’m glad to see you back. - -RITTER. Kiss me. - -MRS. R. The house seemed awfully lonesome. - -RITTER. Kiss me. [_She kisses him._] - -MRS. R. [_Passing above him to the piano at the right_] Crazy thing. -[_He moves over to the little table at the left, rummaging in his -pocket for a cigar, and Mrs. Ritter commences to rummage in a -sewing-basket on the piano. This basket is Mrs. Ritter at a glance, all -green and yellow satin, fraught with meaningless bows and weird-looking -knots. She undoubtedly made it herself, and it must have taken her -months. But she’s a practical woman; at least she thinks she is; and -the sewing-basket helps in a way to sustain the conviction. Poor Paula! -As one looks at her and listens to her he appreciates the fortune of -the circumstance that there is some sane and capable person between her -and the world; and as he more closely observes the sewing-basket, he -rejoices in the blessing of the sane and capable person’s ability to -spare her the necessity of having to make her own clothes. Although, -as a matter of fact, she would look lovely in anything; for Paula -is pretty--charmingly so. And her hair is marvelous. So gold--and -satiny. She is wearing a dress now of lime-green silk with a standing -collar edged with black fur, and gold-colored slippers._] Did you have -anything to eat, Fred? - -RITTER. Yes, I ate on the train. What’s this Jenny was saying? -Something about a show you’re in? - -MRS. R. Oh,--[_Looking at him_] did she tell you? - -RITTER. I wondered what had happened to the furniture when I came in. - -MRS. R. [_Coming around and forward towards the little table below the -piano_] Yes, there’s a rehearsal here tonight. We have it every Tuesday -and Thursday. Of course, it’s just to run over the lines, because we’ve -done it already at the Civic Club on the fourteenth. And, my dear, it -was perfectly marvelous. - -RITTER. What kind of a show is it? - -MRS. R. [_Standing back of the table_] Oh, it’s just a one-act -play,--in one act, you know. And it was really _quite_ wonderful. [_She -gives an inane laugh._] I had no idea. [_She touches her hair and turns -towards the back of the room again._] - -RITTER. How did _you_ happen to get into it? [_Jenny comes along the -hallway from the left carrying a glass of water on a small tray._] - -MRS. R. [_Turning to him_] Well now, wait till I tell you--[_She sees -Jenny._] Oh, thanks, Jenny. [_Jenny starts out again._] Jenny, will you -go to the top of the stairs and see if I left the lights burning in my -room. - -JENNY. [_Turning and starting towards the foot of the stairs in the -right hallway; and setting the tray on the little stand as she goes_] -Yes, mam. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Coming forward holding the glass of water_] I think I -did. [_She sips._] - -JENNY. [_As she crosses the center-door_] Do you want that suit-case -taken up, Mr. Ritter? [_Mrs. Ritter turns round to the right and -watches Jenny._] - -RITTER. Yes, you can take it up if you will, Jenny, thanks. [_Jenny -lifts the suit-case from the partition-seat and goes out and up the -stairs._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Turning to Ritter_] You know, I wrote you about poor -Jimmy Sheppard-- - -RITTER. Yes, what was that, had he been sick? - -MRS. RITTER. Why, not a day, my dear! that’s the reason it was all so -dreadful. Of course, he’d always had more or less of a weak heart; but -nothing to threaten anything of that kind. And just three days before -the performance, mind you:--couldn’t happen any other time. And _poor_ -Mrs. Sheppard playing one of the _leading_ parts. [_She turns to her -left and goes up to the center-door, where she looks out toward the -right hallway expectantly._] - -RITTER. [_Casually depositing the band from his cigar on the tray at -his left_] Did he _know_ she was to play one of the leading parts? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Turning at the center-door and looking at him_] -Who,--Mr. Sheppard? - -RITTER. Yes. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Coming forward again_] Why, of course he did--She’d -just finished telling him when he fell over. [_Ritter appears to be -unduly occupied with his cigar, and Mrs. Ritter takes advantage of the -circumstance to refresh herself with another sip from the glass._] My -dear, poor Clara Sheppard is a _wreck_--You want to write her a note, -Fred, when you get time. And he never spoke--not a solitary word. But, -she says--just as he was dying,--he gave her the funniest look. Oh, she -says--if she lives to be a thousand, she’ll _never_ forget the way he -looked at her. [_She goes up to the center-door and sets the glass down -on the tray._] - -RITTER. [_Still busy with his cigar_] Had he ever seen her act? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Turning to him, thoughtfully_] _I_ don’t know,--whether -he ever had or not. [_Jenny comes down the stairs._] Oh, yes he had, -too! for I saw him myself at the Century Drawing Rooms last Easter -Monday night, and she was in that play there that night, you remember. -[_She moves to the piano and starts looking for something in the -sewing-basket; he moves to the mantelpiece, up at the left, apparently -looking for a match._] - -RITTER. No, I wasn’t there. - -MRS. R. Oh, weren’t you! I thought you were. - -RITTER. No. [_He feels in his pockets._] - -MRS. R. There are matches there on that little table there, Fred. [_She -indicates the table below the mantelpiece._] - -RITTER. [_Discovering some in his pocket_] I have some here. [_He moves -to the arm-chair at the left of table and sits down._] - -MRS. R. [_As Jenny passes along the hallway towards the left_] Oh, -Jenny! - -JENNY. Yes, mam? - -MRS. R. Jenny, will you ask Mrs. Brock if she’ll make some of that -drink that she made the last time? - -JENNY. I think she ’as made it already, Mrs. Ritter. - -MRS. R. Well, will you see, Jenny, please? - -JENNY. [_Starting away_] Yes, mam. - -MRS. R. [_To Ritter_] The folks liked it so much the last time. [_She -picks up her sewing-basket._] - -JENNY. All right, Mrs. Ritter. [_She disappears at the left._] - -MRS. R. [_Stepping out into the hallway_] Oh, and, Jenny! - -JENNY. [_Out at the left_] Yes, mam? - -MRS. R. Tell her to put a little of that _gin_ in it, the way she did -before. - -JENNY. All right, mam. - -MRS. R. Tell her she’ll find some gin in the little buffet in the big -dining-room. - -RITTER. She probably knows where it is. - -MRS. R. [_Coming forward carrying her sewing-basket_] Well, anyway, -that’s how I happened to get into it. [_She sits on the chair at the -left of the small table below the piano._] Mrs. Pampinelli called me -up the first thing in the morning, and she said-- - -RITTER. Is she in it, too? - -MRS. R. [_Looking up from the arrangement of a couple of strips of lace -which she has taken from the sewing-basket_] Who? Mrs. Pampinelli? - -RITTER. Yes. - -MRS. R. No, she doesn’t take any part; she’s just in charge of -everything. - -RITTER. That suits her better. - -MRS. R. Kind of directress, I suppose you’d call her. [_He has some -difficulty keeping his face straight._] Tells us where to go, you -know, on the stage,--so we won’t be running into each other. [_Ritter -laughs._] Really, Fred, you have no idea how easy it is to run into -somebody on the stage. You’ve got to know where you’re going every time -you move. [_He laughs louder._] Why, what are you laughing at? - -RITTER. I was just thinking of a few of the things I’ve heard Mrs. -Pampinelli called. - -MRS. R. [_Looking over at him reproachfully_] Oh--now, that isn’t a bit -nice of you, Fred Ritter. I know you don’t like her. - -RITTER. I like her all right. - -MRS. R. No, you do not, now, Fred,--so _don’t_ say you do. - -RITTER. I think she’s marvelous. - -MRS. R. Well, she’s tremendously clever at this stage business, I don’t -care what you say. You just ought to hear her talk about it sometime. -Now, the last rehearsal we had,--over at her house,--she spoke on -“Technique in Acting as Distinguished from Method;” and you’ve no idea -how interesting it was. [_Ritter glances over at her as he deposits -some ashes from his cigar on the little table-tray._] - -RITTER. You say you’ve given this show before? - -MRS. R. Oh yes! We gave it on the fourteenth at the Civic Club. And, my -dear, that audience just loved it. And you’d be surprised too, for it’s -a terrifically serious thing. In fact, in a way, it’s too serious--for -the general public--that’s the reason several of the people who saw it -suggested that, if we give it again, we should give a dance right after -it. [_She looks closely at her needle and Ritter looks discreetly at -the end of his cigar._] But, as Mrs. Pampinelli says, it’s an absolute -impossibility to give a dance at either the Civic Club or the Century -Drawing Rooms, so that’s how we’re giving it this time down at Hutchy -Kutchy. [_Ritter looks over at her with a quizzical squint._] - -RITTER. Where? - -MRS. R. [_Looking over at him_] Horticultural Hall--there at Broad and -Spruce, you know. - -RITTER. Yes, I know;--what did _you_ call it? - -MRS. R. Hutchy Kutchy. [_She laughs inanely._] Mrs. Pampinelli always -calls it that,--I suppose I’ve gotten into the habit too, from hearing -her. [_She gives another little laugh, then finishes with an amused -sigh._] - -RITTER. What’s the show for, a charity of some kind? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Turning to him suddenly, and with a shade of -practicality_] It’s for the Seamen’s Institute. Kind of a refuge -for them, you know, while they’re in port; so the sailors won’t be -wandering around the streets getting into bad company. [_Ritter -disposes of more ashes, with an unusual precision, and Mrs. -Ritter resumes her sewing. Then, suddenly, she glances toward the -casement-window at the right._] It was Mrs. Pampinelli’s idea, [_She -gathers her things into the sewing-basket and gets up, swinging round -to her left and talking as she goes._] so of course she _didn’t_ want -anything to happen. [_She sets the sewing-basket down on the piano, -and, with another glance thru the window at the right, crosses to the -little table at the left where Ritter is sitting._] So she called me up -the first thing in the morning, and she said, “Paula darling, _have_ -you heard the news?” So, of course, I said “No;” because up to that -time I _hadn’t_, and, naturally, I _wasn’t_ going to say that I had. - -RITTER. Certainly _not_. - -MRS. R. “Well,” she said, “_poor_ Jimmy Sheppard has _just_ passed on.” -Well, luckily, I was sitting down at the time, or I _positively_ think -I should have passed on myself. - -RITTER. [_Raising his hand from the table as though distressed by the -extremity of her remarks_] Don’t say such things. - -MRS. R. [_Mistaking his attitude_] No, really, Fred, you’ve no idea -the _feeling_ that came over me when she said that. “Well,” I said, -“Betty, what on earth are we going to do!” Because the tickets were -all sold, you know. “Well,” she said, “Paula,--the only thing _I_ see -to do, is to have _you_ step right into Clara Sheppard’s role.” “Me!” -I said. “Yes,” she said; “you are the only person in _my_ opinion who -is qualified to play the part.” “But, my dear,” I said, “I’ve never -stepped on a stage in my _life_!” “That is absolutely inconsequential,” -she said, “it is entirely a matter of dramatic instinct. And,” she -said, [_She simpers a bit here and moves around from the right of the -little table where she has been standing to the back of her husband’s -chair, at the left of the table._] “_you_ have _that_--to a far -greater degree than you’ve _any_ idea of.” [_He makes a sound of dry -amusement._] No, really, Fred, everyone was saying it was a positive -tragedy that you couldn’t have been there to see me--I never forgot -myself once. [_She rests her hand on his left shoulder, and he reaches -up and takes her hand._] - -RITTER. What are you going to do now, become an actress? - -MRS. R. No, but it surprised me so, the way everybody enthused; because -I didn’t think I’d done anything so extraordinary--I just walked -onto the stage, and said what I’d been told to say, and walked off -again. [_She emphasizes this last phrase by an indefinite gesture -of nonchalance in the direction of the door at her left._] And yet -everybody seemed to think it was wonderful. Why, Nelly Fell said she’d -never seen even a _professional actress_ so absolutely unconscious. -[_He makes a sound of amusement._] Really, Fred, you ought to have -heard them. Why, they said if they didn’t know, they never in the -_world_ would have believed that it was my first offense. - -RITTER. You mustn’t believe everything these women tell you; they’ll -tell you anything to get their names in the paper. - -MRS. R. Well, it wasn’t only they that said it;--people that I didn’t -even _know_ said it. Why, Mrs. Pampinelli had a letter from a woman -away out at Glenside that happened to see the performance, and she said -that, at times, my repose was _positively_ uncanny. And the papers -simply raved; especially “The Evening Breeze.” I have it upstairs, I -must show it to you. It said that it didn’t understand _how_ I had -escaped the public eye so long. [_She glances at the cuckoo-clock -over the door at the left, and, in doing so, notices a book that has -been left lying on the chair below the door: she steps over and picks -it up._] I was awfully sorry you couldn’t have been there, Fred. I -was going to write you about it when Mrs. Pampinelli first spoke to -me about going on, but there was so little time, you see. And then, -I didn’t think you’d mind;--especially on account of its being for -charity. [_He is very carefully putting ashes on the little tray. She -stands holding the book, looking at him. And there is a slight pause._] -You _don’t_ mind my going on, do you, Fred? - -RITTER. [_Rather slowly_] No,--I don’t mind, if you’re able to get away -with it. - -MRS. R. [_Trailing across back of his chair_] I didn’t think you would. - -RITTER. [_Raising his hand from the table quietly_] But a--[_She comes -to a stop and regards him over her left shoulder._] I don’t want any of -these women exploiting you for their own vanity. [_She doesn’t quite -encompass his meaning, and stands looking at him for a second. Then she -abstractedly lays the book down on the table beside him. There is a -very definite ring at the front door-bell._] I guess that’s some of the -people. [_She starts towards the hallway._] - -RITTER. [_Preparing to rise_] Where do you do this thing, here? - -MRS. R. [_Turning to him and indicating the general arrangement_] -Yes--just the way we have it fixed. - -RITTER. [_Rising briskly and crossing to the table below the piano -at the right, while Mrs. R. continues to the center-door and stands -looking toward the front door. Jenny appears in the left hallway._] I -think I’ll beat it upstairs. - -MRS. R. [_Turning to Jenny_] I guess that’s some of the people, Jenny. -[_She comes forward towards Ritter again._] - -JENNY. Yes, mam. [_She passes back of Mrs. Ritter and along out into -the right hallway to answer the door._] - -MRS. R. Won’t you wait and see the rehearsal, Fred? [_He is gathering -up the telegrams from the table, where he left them earlier._] - -RITTER. [_Turning and going up towards the center-door, thrusting the -telegrams into his inside pocket_] No, I think I’d rather wait and see -the show. [_He passes her, to her left._] - -MRS. R. [_Turning and trailing up towards the center-door after him_] -It’s really _very_ interesting. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Out at the front door_] You see how considerate I -am of you, Jenny, letting myself in? [_Mr. and Mrs. Ritter stop in the -center-door and look toward the front door._] - -JENNY. [_At the front door_] Oh, that’s all right, Mrs. Pampinelli. - -MRS. R. [_Turning quickly to Ritter at her left_] You can’t go up now, -Fred, she’ll see you. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and RITTER, together. - - MRS. P. Well, I daresay you’ll have to open this door quite often - enough tonight without my troubling you. - - RITTER. [_Coming back into the room with a slight gesture of - annoyance_] I don’t want to have to listen to her gab. [_He goes over - to the mantelpiece at the left and takes up his position there, while - Mrs. Ritter, with a movement to him to be silent, drifts down beside - the piano at the right._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Coming into view from the right hallway_] Well, I -suppose I’m still the shining example of punctuality. [_She sweeps -thru the center-door, carrying a large black-bear muff, a fan of black -ostrich-plumes, and a note-book and pencil._] How do you do, Mr. -Ritter,--[_She goes towards Mrs. Ritter._] - -RITTER. [_Nodding_] How do you do. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I’m glad to see you. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Moving towards Mrs. P._] Hello, Betty. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Hello, Paula child,--[_Kisses her_] how are you, -dear? [_Mr. Spindler hurries in from the right hallway, carrying -several books. Mrs. P. steps to the table below the piano._] Will you -give those things to Mrs. Ritter, Mr. Spindler, she’ll set them down -somewhere. [_She sets her own encumbrances down on the table, and Mrs. -Ritter passes back of her to Spindler._] - -SPINDLER. [_Standing in the middle of the room, toward the back_] -Certainly, certainly. - -MRS. RITTER. Good evening, Mr. Spindler. - -SPINDLER. Good evening, good evening. [_Jenny comes in from the right -hallway, takes the tray and glass from the hall table, and goes out the -left hallway._] - -MRS. RITTER. I’ll just take these. - -SPINDLER. [_Giving her the books and a manuscript_] If you please. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Crossing directly to Ritter_] Florence McCrickett -told me you were back; she saw you getting into a taxicab at the -station. [_Giving him her hand_] I’m glad to see you. - -RITTER. I just got in. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. And I suppose you’ve already heard about the great -event? - -RITTER. Yes, she’s just been telling me. [_They laugh together._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, my dear, you may count that day lost that -you missed it. [_She half turns to Mrs. Ritter, who is engaged in -conversation with Spindler._] Mayn’t he, Paula? [_But Paula hasn’t -heard what she’s been saying, so she just looks at her and gives an -inane little laugh. Mrs. Pampinelli continues to Ritter._] Although -you’ll have an opportunity tomorrow night; unless you’re going to run -away again before that. - -RITTER. No, I’ll be here now till after Thanksgiving. [_Mrs. Ritter -leaves Spindler and goes over to a small table at the extreme right, -below the casement-window, where she sets the books and manuscript -down._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning from Ritter and crossing back again to the -table at the right below the piano_] Wonderful! Did you hear that, -Paula? - -MRS. R. What is it, dear? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Mr. Ritter says he will be here for the performance -tomorrow night. - -MRS. R. Yes. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Unfastening her fur neckpiece_] So you will have -an opportunity after all of revealing to him what gems of talent the -unfathomed caves of matrimony bear. [_They both laugh._] - -MRS. R. [_Picking up Mrs. Pampinelli’s muff from the table and taking -the neckpiece_] I’ll just take these, Betty. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Settling her beads_] Anywhere at all, dear. [_Mrs. -R. starts to the right._] Oh, and by the way, Paula--[_Mrs. Ritter -stops and turns to her._] - -MRS. R. Yes? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Indicating the books on the table below the window_] -There’s a remarkable article in one of those books I brought, on -a--gesture. - -MRS. R. [_Looking at the books_] Yes? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. The little gray book I think it is, if I’m not -mistaken. [_She turns to her left and acknowledges Mr. Spindler with a -touch of state._] Mr. Spindler--[_He returns a smiling and very snappy -little bow._] brought it to my attention,--[_She turns back again -to Paula, who has gone up at the right of the piano and is putting -the furs on the partition-seat, while Spindler, becoming suddenly -conscious that Ritter is looking at him, stiffens abruptly, glances at -Ritter, and turns back again to Mrs. Pampinelli._] and it really is -remarkable. So many of my own ideas--things that I have been advocating -for years. I brought it especially for _you_, Paula,--so you must read -it when you have time. [_She picks up her lead-pencil from the little -table and, tapping it against her right temple, thinks profoundly._] -What is that wonderful line of Emerson’s that I’m so fond of--something -about our unexpressed thoughts coming back to accuse us--[_Turning to -Spindler_] You know all those things, Mr. Spindler. - -SPINDLER. [_Pedantically_] Coming back to us “with an alienated -majesty.” - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. That is the one I mean. [_She turns back again to -Paula, who has, by this time, come forward again at the right of -the piano, while Mr. Spindler, again becoming conscious that Ritter -is looking at him, gives him another glance, this time with a shade -of resentment in it, and, coughing briefly, as an emphasis of his -dignity, which Ritter’s general attitude somehow suggests is not being -sufficiently esteemed, turns back to Mrs. Pampinelli._] Well, that is -exactly what occurred to me when I read that article--My own thoughts -returning to me from an alienated majesty. [_She finishes her version -of the quotation to Spindler and Mr. Ritter._] Oh, by the way,--[_She -gives a little mirthless laugh._] I’m afraid I’ve neglected to -introduce Mr. Spindler [_Indicating Ritter with a very casual gesture -of her left hand, and picking up her lead-pencil from the little -table_] This is Mrs. Ritter’s husband, Mr. Spindler. [_Spindler strides -towards Ritter and extends his hand with that vigor which usually -characterizes the greetings of unimportant persons._] - -SPINDLER. Glad! - -RITTER. [_Tonelessly_] How are you? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Addressing Ritter directly_] Mr. Spindler is a -young man who has made quite an exhaustive study of the Little Theatre -Movement throughout the country; [_Spindler moves back towards his -former position, and Paula, over at the right, takes a piece of fudge -from a box on the little table below the casement-window._] and is -working very hard to bring about something of the same kind here. -[_Ritter inclines his head, and Spindler listens to Mrs. Pampinelli, -wreathed in smiles._] And is going to succeed, too, aren’t you, Mr. -Spindler? - -SPINDLER. [_With a kind of pert assurance_] Never fell down on a big -job yet. [_He gives a self-conscious little laugh and glances at -Ritter, under whose coldly-appraising eye the laugh freezes instantly -into a short, hollow cough. Then he turns away._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I’m sure he has all the qualifications. - -SPINDLER. [_With a wooden smile, and saluting_] Thank you, thank you. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Hasn’t he, Paula? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Nibbling at the fudge_] Yes indeed, Mr. Spindler’s quite -indispensable. [_Spindler gives her a pert little nod, by way of -acknowledgment._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_To Mrs. Ritter_] I think that’s what I shall have -to call him hereafter,--[_Turning to Spindler_] the indispensable Mr. -Spindler. [_They all laugh,--a trifle more than the brilliancy of the -remark should reasonably occasion, and Mr. Spindler accounts it even -worthy a salute._] - -SPINDLER. Bouquets were falling [_Here the front door-bell gives two -sharp little staccato rings._] thick and fast. [_He starts towards the -center-door._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, it’s true-- - -SPINDLER. [_Speaking directly to Mrs. Ritter_] I’ll answer it. [_He -hurries out into the right hallway._] - -MRS. P. and MRS. R., speaking together. - - MRS. P. I know I don’t know what on earth I should do without him. - - MRS. R. [_Addressing Spindler as he hurries out the hallway_] All - right, if you will, Mr. Spindler. - -SPINDLER. [_Calling back_] Sure! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. He is one of those rare persons who never forsakes one -in the hour of quotation. [_She turns to Mrs. Ritter, who is chewing -fudge at her right._] What are you eating, Paula? - -MRS. RITTER. A bit of fudge. Would you like some, Betty? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Very definitely_] No, thank you, dear. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Indicating the table below the casement-window_] There’s -some here. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Raising her hand in a gesture of finality, and -speaking with conviction_] I never eat immediately before using my -voice. And you should not, either, Paula,--particularly candy. [_She -moves across to the left to Mr. Ritter. She is an imposing woman, in -her late fifties, with a wealth of false hair, perfectly done, and a -martial bearing. She is one of those matrons who is frequently referred -to in the suburban weeklies as a “leading spirit”; and this particular -description has always so flattered Mrs. Pampinelli’s particular -vanity, that she overlooks no opportunity of justifying it: an effort -that has resulted in a certain grandeur of voice and manner; which, -rather fortunately, becomes the distinction of her person. She is -gowned in sapphire-blue velvet, close-fitting, with an independent, -triangular train, from the waist, probably four yards long. Her -necklace, comb, the buckles on her black-velvet slippers, and her -rings, are all touched with sapphire._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Looking vaguely at the fudge-box_] There’s so much of it -here. [_Jenny appears from the left hallway._] - -MRS. P. and MRS. R., speaking together. - - MRS. P. [_Coming to Ritter’s right_] Very tragic about poor Sheppard, - wasn’t it, Mr. Ritter? - - MRS. R. [_Going up to the center-door, and speaking to Jenny as she - goes_] Mr. Spindler is answering the door, Jenny, you needn’t bother. - -RITTER and JENNY, speaking together. - - RITTER. [_To Mrs. Pampinelli_] Yes, it _was_--too bad. - - JENNY. [_To Mrs. Ritter_] Oh, all right, then. [_She withdraws, and - Mrs. Ritter stands looking out into the right hallway._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I suppose Paula wrote you. - -RITTER. Yes. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Dear me--I don’t know when anything has so upset me. -[_Ritter stands looking at the end of his cigar and Mrs. Pampinelli -looks straight ahead._] I don’t believe I closed an eye the entire -night,--wondering where on earth I should find someone to play his -wife’s part. [_Ritter glances at her, as he places the cigar in his -mouth, and Mrs. Pampinelli looks at him quickly._] Because, of course, -you know that Mrs. Sheppard was to have played the part that Paula -plays. - -RITTER. Yes, so she told me. [_Mrs. Ritter, still nibbling at the -fudge, wanders down and stands in the middle of the room._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. But we only had three days to get someone; and it -didn’t seem possible to me that anyone could memorize that part in -that length of time. [_Mrs. Ritter touches her hair and makes a little -sound of amusement,--a kind of modest acknowledgment of the brilliancy -of her achievement._] So I thought at first--of having Clara Sheppard -go on anyway, and I should make an announcement; but, you see, Mr. -Sheppard was buried on the fourteenth, and that was the night of the -performance; and as I thought the matter over, it seemed to me that -perhaps it was just a little too much to expect of her--[_Ritter gives -her another glance._] Considering her experience as an actress, I mean. - -RITTER. [_Taking the cigar from his mouth and speaking with a shade of -deliberation_] Couldn’t she have kept his death a secret,--until after -the performance? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, I thought of that, too; [_Ritter looks -at her steadily._] but, you see, it was three days,--[_He nods, -understandingly._] and he was so very well known. [_She moves back -across the room towards the table below the piano, and Ritter stands -looking after her. Simultaneously, there is a frantic giggle from the -right hallway. Mrs. Ritter goes up to the center-door, looks in the -direction of the laughter, and waves her handkerchief, while Mrs. -Pampinelli, passing below the table, gathers up her note-book and -pencil and continues to the table below the casement-window, where she -secures the manuscript. Ritter steps forward from his position before -the mantelpiece, and disposes of some ashes on the little table-tray._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Out in the right hallway_] Paula, that’s a very dangerous -young man you have on that door tonight. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Calling to her_] I think it’s very kind of Mr. Spindler. -[_Mrs. Pampinelli comes around in front of the big arm-chair below the -casement-window._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Coming into view, with considerable flourish_] Kind! -My dear, I haven’t heard anything like it since I was twenty! [_She -gives a little wave of her gorgeous, single white ostrich-plume fan at -Mrs. Pampinelli._] Hello, Betty! [_Then to Mrs. Ritter_] How are you, -darling? - -MRS. RITTER. Hello, Nelly. [_Nelly kisses her._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Enthroning herself in the arm-chair at the right_] -Is it _really_ possible! - -MRS. FELL. [_Turning from Mrs. Ritter and hurrying through the -center-door_] You’re a sweet child! [_Extending the fan towards Mrs. -Pampinelli, and coming quickly forward to the table at the right below -the piano_] Yes, and I should have been here every night at this hour -if it weren’t for that dreadful officer up at the parkway! [_She sets -her fan and black-velvet bag on the table. Spindler comes in from -the right hallway and engages in conversation with Mrs. Ritter in -the centre-door._] He seems to take a fiendish delight in selecting -_my_ car, of all the _millions_ that pass there at this hour, to do -_this_! [_She extends her right arm and hand, after the fashion of -traffic-officers._] So I told him yesterday afternoon, I said, “Look -here, young man!” [_She points her forefinger as though reproving -the officer._] “You needn’t expect any Christmas-present from _me_ -next Christmas, for you just--won’t--get it. Not till you change your -tactics.” So he says, after this, he’s just going to let me go ahead -and run into a trolley-car;--see how I like that. [_Mrs. Pampinelli, -making marginal notes in the manuscript, laughs faintly._] “Well,” I -said, “it’d be a change, anyway,--from being stopped all the time.” -[_She abstractedly picks up her fan again._] I don’t think he likes my -chauffeur. And I don’t blame him; I don’t like him myself. He drives -too slow--[_She starts for the center-door._] He’s like an old woman. -[_She sees Ritter, peering at her, and starts abruptly._] Well, for -Mercy’s sake, Frederick Ritter, you don’t mean to tell me that’s you! - -RITTER. I was here a minute ago. - -MRS. FELL. [_Laughing flightily_] Well, I declare! I don’t know what’s -happening to my eyes! [_Turning to Mrs. Pampinelli_] I saw him standing -there, [_Turning back again and starting towards Ritter, with her hand -extended_] but I thought it was one of the other gentlemen! How are -you, dear boy? [_He takes her hand and stoops over as though to kiss -her. She turns her head away quickly._] Stop it! Frederick Ritter! -[_Mrs. Pampinelli glances over, then resumes her notes. Mrs. Fell -half-turns to Mrs. Ritter, who is still talking to Mr. Spindler up at -the center-door._] Paula!--do you see what this bad boy of yours is -doing? [_Paula just looks and laughs meaninglessly, and resumes her -conversation with Spindler._] What brought you back so soon? - -RITTER. [_Assuming the attitude and tone of a lover_] I got thinking of -you. - -MRS. FELL. [_Touching her hair_] I thought you were out in Seattle or -South Carolina or one of those funny places. - -RITTER. [_Leaning a bit closer and speaking more softly_] I couldn’t -keep away from you any longer. [_Nelly darts a swift glance at him._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Starting towards the right_] Don’t play with fire, -Frederick--[_He laughs hard. She pauses in the middle of the room and -turns and looks at him._] You know what they say about widows, and I’ve -been all kinds. [_She continues over towards Mrs. Pampinelli._] Oh, -Professor Pampinelli! [_Turning and addressing Ritter directly_] I call -her Professor, she knows so much. [_Turning back to Mrs. Pampinelli_] -Mrs. P. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Looking up suddenly_] I beg your pardon, Nelly -dear--I didn’t know you were speaking to me. - -MRS. FELL. I want to know if you can take me home in your car tonight? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Why, certainly, dear. - -MRS. FELL. My chauffeur has been deviling me for the past two days -about some boxing-bee,--or wrestling-match or something that he wants -to see; and I told him he could go if there were someone here to take -me home. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I can take you, of course. - -MRS. FELL. All right, then, I can chase him; [_She turns to the left._] -I won’t hear any more about that. Oh, Mr. Spindler! - -SPINDLER. Yes, mam? [_Excuses himself to Mrs. Ritter, who steps into -the left hallway and beckons with her finger for Jenny._] - -MRS. FELL. Would you mind doing a favor for a very old lady? - -SPINDLER. [_Who has hurried forward and is standing in the middle of -the room, at attention._] You know what I told you out at the door? -[_Nelly gives a shriek, and giggles._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Looking coyly over Spindler’s shoulder at Ritter_] Oh, -you hear that, Frederick Ritter? You have a rival on the premises. Mr. -Spindler told me out at the door tonight,--that _my_ will was _his_ -pleasure. - -RITTER. [_Looking at the tip of his cigar_] San Juan is never dead -while Mr. Spindler lives. [_There is a general laugh._] - -SPINDLER. [_Turning to Ritter_] Say, that’s pretty good! - -MRS. FELL. Yes, I was afraid he was something of a gay deceiver. - -SPINDLER. [_Speaking directly to Mrs. Fell_] Only one way to find out. -[_Mrs. Fell laughs deprecatingly and sweeps the tip of her fan across -his nose._] - -MRS. FELL. Naughty boy. [_She giggles a little more, then becomes -practical._] Well then, I’ll tell you what you may do for me, Mr. -Spindler, if you don’t mind. [_Jenny appears in the left hallway and -Mrs. Ritter gives her an order of some sort, which appears to require -a bit of explanation._] Go out to my chauffeur, [_She turns him round -by the shoulder and they move up towards the center-door._] you’ll -probably find him asleep in the car, and tell him I said it’s all -right,--he can go along--that Mrs. Pampinelli will take me home in -_her_ car. - -SPINDLER. [_Hurrying out the right hallway_] Righto! [_Jenny -withdraws._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Standing in the center-door and calling after him_] -Like a good boy. [_She turns, to find Mrs. Ritter at her left in the -center-door. She takes her arm and they come forward._] Come in here, -Paula Ritter, and explain to me _why_ [_They stop in the middle of the -room, just above the line on which Ritter is standing._] you didn’t -tell me my--lover [_She peers around in front of Paula’s shoulder at -Ritter._] was coming back today? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Laughing faintly_] My dear, I didn’t know it myself -until twenty minutes ago. - -MRS. FELL. [_Becoming instantly rigid, and piercing Mrs. Ritter with a -look_] You don’t mean to tell me he returned unexpectedly? - -MRS. RITTER. He never even sent a wire. - -MRS. FELL. [_Moving over to the right, to the little table below the -piano_] I’m surprised at you, Frederick. I consider that the supreme -indiscretion in a husband--[_She lays her fan down on the table._] to -return unexpectedly. Isn’t it, Paula? [_She commences to unfasten her -cloak._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Moving over to help her_] I never got such a surprise in -my life. - -MRS. FELL. It has probably wrecked more perfectly good homes than -any other one thing in the calendar. [_She slips her cloak off her -shoulders, and Mrs. Ritter, who has passed back of her, takes it. It is -a flowing affair in black and silver, with voluminous kimona sleeves -edged with black fur, and a deep circular collar of silver-cloth and -fur._] - -MRS. RITTER. I love your cape, Nelly. - -MRS. FELL. [_Settling her ornaments_] Do you really? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Examining it_] Beautiful. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Reaching for it_] Let me see it, Paula. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Handing it to her_] Where’s your seal, Nelly? - -MRS. FELL. I thought I wouldn’t take it out this winter; I got so tired -looking at it last year. I want to have that collar and cuffs taken -off, anyway, before I wear it again;--there’s too much skunk there. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. This is perfectly gorgeous, dear. [_To Mrs. Ritter_] -Isn’t it? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Picking up Nelly’s fan from the table_] Lovely. And -isn’t this sweet? [_Mrs. Pampinelli takes the fan from Mrs. Ritter and -returns the wrap._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Charming. - -MRS. FELL. I’m so glad you like it;--I was afraid at first perhaps it -might make me look a little too much like a bride. - -RITTER. [_With mock derision_] Ha! [_Nelly snaps her head toward him -and pins him with a narrow glare._] - -MRS. FELL. Don’t be peevish, Frederick-- - -MRS. RITTER. [_To Mrs. Pampinelli, as she takes the fan from her and -replaces it on the table_] Isn’t he terrible! - -MRS. FELL. It isn’t my fault that your wife is a great actress. [_She -gives a comic nod and wink at Mrs. Ritter. Ritter laughs._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Starting towards the door up above the casement-window, -at the right, with Mrs. Fell’s cape_] Now, Fred Ritter, you just stop -that! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Never mind him, Paula--[_Paula goes out with the -cape._] He’ll probably change his tune after tomorrow night. [_Mrs. -Fell picks up her fan and commences to fan herself._] - -RITTER. [_Standing over above the table at the left, smoking_] I’m -thinking of what happened to poor Jimmy Sheppard. [_Jenny comes in at -the left hallway, carrying a small punch-bowl filled with claret, which -she sets down carefully on the little stand in the hallway. Mrs. Ritter -re-enters from the door on the right and crosses over to Jenny, whom -she assists._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Strolling across towards Ritter, fanning herself_] Oh, I -suppose it must be very difficult for the marvelous male, to suddenly -find himself obliged to bask in the reflected glory of a mere wife. -[_Mrs. Pampinelli laughs, over her notes._] For I’ve never known one -yet who was able to do it gracefully. [_She flips the tip of the fan -at Ritter’s nose. Mrs. Ritter gives Jenny a direction of some kind and -Jenny goes out again at the left hallway._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_As Mrs. Fell saunters back again across the room_] -Well, perhaps Mr. Ritter will show himself consistently _masculine_ -in this instance, and do the exceptional thing. [_Mrs. Ritter follows -Jenny out._] - -RITTER. I suppose that’s what you’d call _veiled_ sarcasm, isn’t it? -[_Mrs. Pampinelli laughs and rises._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Standing in the middle of the room_] I shouldn’t say it -was veiled at _all_. [_Moving towards the table below the piano_] I -don’t think it’s even _draped_. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Laughing still, and coming to the little table_] -Here’s the manuscript, Nelly. - -MRS. FELL. [_Stepping closer to the table_] Yes, dear. - -RITTER. What are you going to do now, keep _on_ giving this show? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, not this particular one, Mr. Ritter, no; but we -are going to continue giving shows. - -RITTER. What’s the idea? - -MRS. FELL. They’re to be for different charities. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. And then they will afford the boys and girls an -opportunity of developing themselves as artists. - -RITTER. What are they going to do, all go on the stage? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, hardly all of them will go;--but those that we -feel have sufficient talent we will encourage to go on, by all means. - -RITTER. Do you think Mrs. Ritter has sufficient talent? - -MRS. FELL. She’s wonderful, Fred, really. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes, I should say that Paula had a very remarkable -talent. - -RITTER. Well, what will you do about _her_? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. How do you mean, Mr. Ritter, what will we _do_ about -her? - -RITTER. Why, I mean,--you’d hardly encourage _her_ to go on the stage, -would you? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. And why not? - -RITTER. Why, what about her home? [_Nelly Fell touches her hair and -gives Mrs. Pampinelli a look of amused impatience._] She couldn’t very -well walk away and leave that, could she? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, personally, Mr. Ritter, I have always felt that, -where it is a question of talent, one should not allow himself to be -deterred by purely personal considerations. - -MRS. FELL. She’s really awfully good, Fred! You wait till you -see--You’ll want her to go yourself. - -RITTER. [_Stepping quietly to the table at the left and disposing of -some cigar-ashes_] She’ll have to be pretty good. - -MRS. FELL. Won’t he, Betty? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, as far as that is concerned, I think that the -question of whether to be or or not to be an actress, is one that every -woman must, at some time or other in her life, decide for herself. -[_Spindler hurries in from the right hallway and down to Mrs. Fell’s -left, where he stands at attention, saluting, of course, as usual. Mr. -Spindler is full of salutes. He was in the army;--drafted ten weeks -before the armistice; and subjected throughout the long term of his -service to the dangers and exposure of a clerkship in the Personnel at -Upton. And he’s never gotten over it; being of that immature type of -mind upon which the letter of the Military makes a profound impression. -He’s a peppy person, thin and stilted,--in dinner clothes,--with sleek -hair and goggle glasses: one of that distressing student-order that is -inevitably to be found in the retinue of some Mrs. Pampinelli,--her -social status and constant championship of so-called artistic movements -affording him a legitimate indulgence of his particular weaknesses. So -he becomes a kind of lead-pencil-bearer extraordinary to her ladyship; -and her ladyship tolerates him,--for a variety of reasons; not the -least of which is his unfailing attitude of acquiescence in all her -opinions. And she has so many opinions,--and on so many different -subjects, that this feature of Mr. Spindler’s disposition is far from -inconsiderable. Then, he has a most highly developed faculty for small -correctnesses,--an especially valuable asset, in view of the enormous -amount of detail work incidental to Mrs. Pampinelli’s vast activities. -He reminds her of things, or, “brings them to her attention,” as she -puts it. For Mr. Spindler is one of those--fortunately few--people who -remembers things--word for word--even the things he’s read--And he -appears to have read most everything. And he quotes incessantly. As -Mrs. Pampinelli has already observed of him, “he is one of those rare -persons who never forsakes one in the hour of quotation.”_] Look here, -Nelly. - -MRS. FELL. Yes, dear. [_Mrs. Ritter comes in from the left hallway -carrying several punch-glasses, which she puts down on the hallway -table._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Indicating a certain line in the manuscript with -her lead-pencil_] There are a couple of little changes here on page -twelve--[_Mrs. Fell opens her lorgnon and looks at the manuscript._] I -have them marked. - -MRS. FELL. [_Becoming conscious of Spindler at her left_] Pardon me, -Betty. [_Turning to Spindler_] Did you tell him, Mr. Spindler? - -SPINDLER. Yes, mam; he’s gone on his way rejoicing. - -MRS. FELL. You’re a sweet child. - -SPINDLER. [_Snapping his salute_] Thank you. [_He does an about-face -and goes up to Mrs. Ritter,--Ritter watching him with an expression -susceptible of infinite interpretation._] - -MRS. FELL. The only man I’ve met in a long time that has made me wish I -were--ten years younger. - -RITTER. Ha! - -MRS. FELL. [_Pertly_] Outside of you, of course. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With a touch of wearied impatience_] Look here, dear. - -MRS. FELL. [_Stepping quickly to the table again and re-adjusting her -lorgnon_] Yes, I beg your pardon. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. You see, in this line here,--the author has employed a -defective verb in the perfect tense. [_Mrs. Fell looks suddenly at her -and then right back to the manuscript again. Ritter is watching them -closely._] Would you come here for a moment, Mr. Spindler? - -SPINDLER. Certainly, certainly. [_Excuses himself to Mrs. Ritter, with -whom he has been chatting, and comes down briskly to Mrs. Fell’s left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. If you please. - -MRS. FELL. [_Appearing to have some difficulty locating the defective -verb_] Where is that, now, that you were saying, Betty? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Indicating with the point of the pencil_] Right -there, dear. [_Nelly just looks at the spot, through her lorgnon._] -This is the point I was speaking to you about last night, Mr. Spindler. - -SPINDLER. [_Securing his goggles_] Oh, yes, yes! [_Ritter draws Mrs. -Ritter’s attention to the group down at the table. She reproves him -with a steady stare. He smiles and shakes his head hopelessly._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. You see, this author has employed a defective here, in -the perfect tense. - -SPINDLER. [_Looking closely_] Ah, yes, I see. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Looking at him directly_] So I have changed it. [_He -straightens up and looks at her, and Mrs. Fell looks from one to the -other._] - -SPINDLER. A very good change. [_He nods and crosses over to the left, -passing below the table at the left. Ritter watches him until he takes -up his position just below the mantelpiece, rather ill at ease under -Ritter’s gaze._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I think so. So, if you’ll just watch that Nelly. [_She -picks up the manuscript._] - -MRS. FELL. All right, I’ll watch it. [_She reaches for her bag and -takes out a lip-stick. Jenny appears from the left hallway with a tray -of cakes, which Mrs. Ritter assists her in making room for on the hall -table._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Starting for the center-door_] I must show it to -Paula, it’s her line. [_The door-bell rings._] Paula child. [_Jenny -passes back of Mrs. Ritter and goes out into the right hallway to -answer the door-bell._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Eating a cake_] Yes, dear? [_Mrs. Pampinelli calls her -attention to the change in the manuscript. Mrs. Fell is making up -her lips down at the table below the piano. Ritter is watching her, -and Spindler is watching Ritter, and trying to assume his general -deportment._] - -RITTER. Are _you_ in the show, Nelly? - -MRS. FELL. [_Without turning, and applying the lip-stick, with the aid -of the little mirror in her hand-bag_] Who, me? - -RITTER. Yes. - -MRS. FELL. [_Half-turning, and giving him a melting look_] Yes;--I play -a chicken. [_She returns to her mirror._] - -RITTER. [_Casually_] In the last act, I suppose. [_Nelly snaps her head -around and pierces him with one of her looks._] - -MRS. FELL. No, and not in the last stages, either. [_She resumes her -make-up. Nelly is forever making up. But, she does know how to do it. -Of course, she should, considering the years of her experience in the -art. For Nelly Fell’s age amounts to an achievement; one of those -attainments so absolutely undisputed that it is perfectly permissible -to refer to it in any gathering. She says she’ll “soon be sixty”; but -the short and simple annals of society record flutterings of the lady -as far back as the first term of President Grant. And she’s still -fluttering--a perennial ingenue, full of brittle moves and staccato -vocalisms. She looks like a little French marquise, so chic, and -twittery--and rich. For, of course, Nelly is wealthy--enormously so; -it would be utterly impossible to have her hair and not have money; -the feature is financial in itself; so silver-white, with a lovely -bandau of small, pale-pink leaves, tipped with diamond dewdrops; all -heightened tremendously by the creation in black velvet she is wearing. -This gown is heavily trimmed with silver, and quite sleeveless, with -two panels of the goods fastened at the waist on either side and -trailing at least a yard. She has a preference for diamonds and pearls, -obviously, for her ear-rings, dog-collar, bracelets and rings are all -of those gems, and her long, triple-string necklace is of pearls. -Altogether, Nelly is a very gorgeous little old lady--from the topmost -ringlet of her aristocratic hair, to the pearl buckles on her tiny -black-velvet slippers._] - -SPINDLER. Mrs. Fell is the official promptress. - -MRS. FELL. [_Turning her head and looking at Ritter_] I _prompt_ -everybody. [_She replaces her lip-stick in the hand-bag._] - -RITTER. Yes? - -MRS. FELL. [_Putting the hand-bag down again on the table_] As well as -lending my moral support. - -RITTER. Yes? [_Spindler laughs._] - -MRS. FELL. [_To Ritter_] You bold thing! - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Coming into view from the right hallway_] Good evening, -everybody! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to him, from Mrs. Ritter, with whom she has -been discussing the change in the manuscript_] Oh, good evening, Mr. -Hossefrosse. [_They shake hands._] - -MRS. RITTER. Mr. Hossefrosse. [_Mrs. Pampinelli comes forward into the -room again, bringing the manuscript with her._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. Mrs. Ritter--good evening. [_Mrs. Ritter asks him if he -will have a glass of claret and he says yes, so she proceeds to fill -him out one._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I hope the rest of the people aren’t far behind you. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Are we late? - -MRS. FELL. [_Waving to him_] Hello, Huxley. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Not very. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Hello, Nelly. How are you? [_Mrs. Ritter gives him the -claret, and he stands up at the center-door with her, drinking it. -Teddy Spearing wanders in from the right hallway._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Passing below the little table below the piano and -laying the manuscript on it_] Here’s the manuscript, Nelly. [_She -continues to the arm-chair below the casement-window, and, picking -up her note-book from the little table at her right, sits down and -commences to make notes._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Seeing Teddy Spearing, and starting towards the right -partition_] Oh, Teddy Spearing! - -TEDDY. Hello, Nelly. - -MRS. FELL. [_Beckoning him with her fan_] Come here, dear, I’ve got -something to tell you. [_Teddy leans over the partition at the right -and Nelly kneels on the partition-seat and whispers something to him. -Hossefrosse and Mrs. Ritter are conversing in the center-door, Mrs. -Pampinelli is making notes down at the right, Ritter is standing over -in front of the mantelpiece, smoking, and Spindler is standing just -below him, to his left, watching him._] - -SPINDLER. [_In a sudden surge of courage, and taking a rather -nonchalant step towards Ritter_] Could you spare one of those cigars, -please? [_Ritter looks at him keenly, then reaches in his vest-pocket -for a cigar._] - -RITTER. Do you smoke? - -SPINDLER. Semi-occasionally, yes. [_Ritter hands him the cigar and he -steps nonchalantly back to his former position, Ritter keeping one eye -on him. He examines the cigar curiously, and, being apparently very -near-sighted, seems to have considerable difficulty in deciphering the -band-inscription._] - -RITTER. You can light _either_ end of it. - -SPINDLER. [_Very self-conscious_] Yes,--I was just looking at this -label here: it’s rather keen. [_He puts the cigar in his mouth, and -attempts an attitude of careless detachment._] - -RITTER. Have you got a match? - -SPINDLER. I don’t--[_As he opens his mouth to speak the cigar falls on -the floor, and he scrambles after it._] - -TEDDY. [_Laughing incredulously and turning away from Nelly_] Oh, Nelly! - -MRS. FELL. Upon my word, dear! Come here till I tell you. [_Teddy -returns to the partition and Nelly proceeds with her gossip._] - -SPINDLER. [_Straightening up, and attempting another man-of-the-world -attitude_] I don’t care to smoke just now, thank you. [_He holds the -cigar in his fingers._] - -RITTER. [_As things settle again_] You’ve been in the army, haven’t you? - -SPINDLER. [_Turning to Ritter with a suggestion of military erectness_] -Yes; I put in the better part of three months down at Upton, in the -Personnel. - -RITTER. I imagined from your salute you’d been around one of the camps. - -SPINDLER. Yes,--I was Third Lieutenant down there--[_Ritter looks at -him sharply; then Spindler turns and meets the look._] Regimental -Sergeant Major. - -RITTER. Rest. - -MRS. FELL. [_Coming away from the partition_] So I’m going to ask -him right out the very next time I meet him. [_She comes down to the -little table below the piano again. Mr. Hossefrosse comes through the -center-door towards Ritter, rubbing his hands, and Teddy moves over -towards Mrs. Ritter, who is still officiating at the punch-bowl._] - -TEDDY and HOSSEFROSSE, speaking together. - - TEDDY. [_Speaking to Mrs. Fell_] Maybe he doesn’t know it himself. - - HOSSEFROSSE. [_Addressing Ritter_] Ah, Mr. Ritter! How do you do, sir? - [_They shake hands._] - -RITTER. How do you do? - -MRS. FELL and HOSSEFROSSE, together. - - MRS. FELL. Well, I’m going to find out, whether he does or not. - - HOSSEFROSSE. [_To Ritter_] Decided there was no place like home, eh? - [_He laughs, with a mirthless effusiveness._] - -RITTER. Are you in the show, too? [_Mrs. Ritter fills out a glass of -claret for Teddy._] - -MRS. FELL and HOSSEFROSSE, together. - - MRS. FELL. I should say he is in it. - - HOSSEFROSSE. We’re all in it. - -MRS. FELL. He’s the leading man. [_Hossefrosse raises his right -hand toward Nelly and laughs deprecatingly._] Unfortunately, there -isn’t a place in the play where he can use that perfectly gorgeous -singing-voice of his. [_Hossefrosse is quite overcome, and crosses, -with hand extended, to Spindler._] It’s true. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Good evening, Mr. Spindler. - -SPINDLER. Good evening, good evening. [_In shifting the cigar from his -right hand to his left he drops it._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. Uh! I beg your pardon! [_Mrs. Ritter laughs at something -Teddy has said to her, then hands him a glass of claret. Mr. -Hossefrosse stoops to pick up Spindler’s cigar._] - -SPINDLER. [_Stooping also, after the cigar_] That’s all right. - -HOSSEFROSSE and SPINDLER, together. - - HOSSEFROSSE. I’ll get it. [_He picks it up and hands it to Spindler._] - - SPINDLER. It isn’t lit. - -HOSSEFROSSE. There we are. - -SPINDLER. Thank you very much. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Don’t mention it. [_He crosses down to Nelly, who is -looking through the manuscript at the table below the piano._] - -TEDDY. [_Coming through the center-door and speaking to Ritter_] How do -you do, Mr. Ritter? - -RITTER. [_Shaking hands with him_] How are you? - -TEDDY. [_Nodding to Spindler_] Good evening. - -SPINDLER. Good evening, sir; good evening. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Teddy! - -TEDDY. [_Crossing towards the piano_] Yes? - -MRS. RITTER, MRS. PAMPINELLI and HOSSEFROSSE, together. - - MRS. RITTER. [_Waving her handkerchief toward the right hallway_] - Hello, Florence! - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Addressing Teddy_] Did you telephone that man about - those tickets? - - HOSSEFROSSE. [_Standing at Mrs. Fell’s left shoulder_] What are you - doing, Nelly? - -FLORENCE, MRS. FELL and TEDDY, together. - - FLORENCE. [_Out in the right hallway_] Am I the last? [_She hurries - into view and whispers something to Paula at the center-door which - sends Paula into a fit of laughing._] - - MRS. FELL. [_To Hossefrosse_] Making more changes. [_He crosses over - to the right in front of Nelly and sits on the piano-stool, back of - Mrs. Pampinelli._] - - TEDDY. [_Answering Mrs. Pampinelli_] Yes, I did, Mrs. - Pampinelli, he said he’d have them there all right. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Thank you so much. [_Teddy goes up and crosses above -the piano, where he engages Mr. Hossefrosse in conversation._] Hello, -Florence! [_Jenny comes into view from the right hallway._] - -FLORENCE. [_Coming straight forward from the center-door_] Am I the -last? [_The front door-bell rings again, and Jenny turns and goes back -into the right hallway again._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No, but you’re very close to it. How are you, dear? - -FLORENCE. Rushed like mad. [_Flipping her lynx muff_] Hello, everybody. -Hello, Nelly. [_She swings round to her left._] - -MRS. FELL. Hello, Flossie. - -FLORENCE. How do you do, Mr. Spindler? [_Hossefrosse gets up and -whispers something to Mrs. Pampinelli, in which she agrees._] - -SPINDLER. How do you do? [_Ritter bows very graciously to Florence, and -Mrs. Ritter comes forward to her husband’s right, eating a piece of -cake._] - -FLORENCE. [_Extending the muff at arms-length at Ritter_] No, I don’t -speak to you at all. [_She removes her stole._] - -RITTER. What’s the matter? - -FLORENCE. Paula, did you know your husband is becoming very snooty? -[_Hossefrosse resumes his seat on the piano-stool._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Sliding her hand through Ritter’s right arm_] Why didn’t -you speak to Florence at the station today, Fred? - -RITTER. I didn’t see you today. - -FLORENCE. Well, my dear, you _must_ be getting old; for Irene Colter -and I did everything but stand on our heads to attract your attention. -[_On the last word of this sentence she flips one of the tails of -the stole at him, and he ducks, as though afraid of getting hurt._] -Where shall I put these, Paula? [_Mrs. Pampinelli rises quietly from -her chair at the right, and, lost in thought, proceeds slowly and -majestically across in front of Mrs. Fell to the middle of the room, -tapping her lead-pencil on the note-book._] - -MRS. RITTER. I’ll take them. [_She takes the muff and stole from -Florence and goes up and out into the right hallway with them._] - -FLORENCE. [_Espying Teddy up back of the piano, shading his eyes with -his hand, as though trying to see her from a great distance_] Hello, -Teddy dear! [_Goes towards him_] What are you doing away back here in -the corner? [_She makes a sudden move as though to tickle him in the -ribs, but he laughs and jumps away. Mrs. Pampinelli has by this time -reached the center of the room, where she stands turning from side -to side in a profound indecision as to the relationship of certain -positions. She indicates her line of thought by divers pointings and -flippings of the lead-pencil. Ritter watches her with narrow amusement; -and, presently, Mrs. Fell, who is still occupied with the manuscript -at the little table, looks up, distracted by the gyrations of the -lead-pencil._] - -MRS. FELL. What’s the matter, Betty? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I was just wondering about a little piece of business -here. - -SPINDLER. [_Stepping to the back of the arm-chair at the left and -leaning over it towards Mrs. Pampinelli_] Can I help you, Mrs. P.? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Without turning to him_] No, thank you; it’s -purely technical. [_He resumes his position at the left corner of -the mantelpiece and glances at Ritter, who is obliged to use his -handkerchief to hide his amusement. Mrs. Ritter comes in through the -door at the right, above the piano._] - -MRS. FELL. Betty, did I tell you I saw Clara Sheppard today? [_But Mrs. -Pampinelli is still deep in technical profundities, and simply silences -her with a gesture of her right hand._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Coming forward at the right of the piano_] Where did you -see her, Nelly? - -MRS. FELL. Darlington’s, at the mourning counter. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Coming suddenly out of her abstraction, and turning -to Mrs. Fell_] Is she going in black? - -MRS. FELL. My dear, she’s _in_ it already. - -TWILLER. [_Coming in the right hallway_] Good evening! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. She’s very foolish, under the circumstances. - -MRS. FELL. That’s just what I told her today. - -TWILLER. [_Coming through the center-door and forward at the left of -the piano_] Good evening, Mrs. Ritter. - -MRS. RITTER. Good evening, Mr. Twiller. - -TWILLER. [_To Hossefrosse, casually_] Huxley. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Shifting from the piano-stool to the arm-chair, which -Mrs. Pampinelli has just vacated, and proceeding to study his part, -which he has taken from his pocket_] Hello, Ralph. - -MRS. FELL. Hello, Ralph. - -TWILLER. Nelly! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Still in the middle of the room_] You’re the ten -o’clock scholar again tonight, Mr. Twiller. [_Jenny crosses from the -right hallway to the left, and goes out._] - -TWILLER. I’m awfully sorry, Mrs. P., really; but the fates seem to be -against me. [_Teddy gives a little whistle at him. He turns and sees -him, standing with Florence, up back of the piano._] Hello, Teddy! -[_He goes towards him, and Teddy shoots at him with his thumb and -forefinger, by way of reply. Florence smiles and extends her left arm -and hand towards him._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and TWILLER, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Moving over from the middle of the room to the left - of Mrs. Fell, who is still at the table below the piano_] What was - that you were saying, Nelly, about Clara Sheppard? - - TWILLER. Flossie, dear, I didn’t see you two up here! [_He takes - Florence’s hand and kisses it. Then he crosses to the left and shakes - hands with Ritter; then over to Spindler, and then starts back towards - Florence, at the piano. As he passes Ritter, Ritter taps him on the - right shoulder; he turns, and Ritter asks him something. He replies, - and they stand chatting for a moment; then Ritter indicates the - partition-seat behind them and they sit down, to talk it over._] - -MRS. FELL. Why, I simply told her--I said, “Don’t be spectacular, dear; -it’ll only make it more difficult for you when you want to marry again. -And,” I said, “you probably _will_ marry again,”--[_Spindler sits on the -chair below the door at the left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Of course she will. - -MRS. FELL. “For you’re a comparatively young woman. So,” I said, “just -get through the next few months as undramatically as possible. [_Jenny -enters in the left hallway and takes empty glasses off._] I know he -was your _first_ husband, and all that; but, after all,” I said, “he -was _only_ your husband: it isn’t as though you’d lost someone who was -very _close_ to you”--[_She turns her head and speaks directly to Mrs. -Pampinelli._] Like one of your own people, [_Turning to Mrs. Ritter, -who is standing at her right_] or something like that, I mean. “And,” I -said, “another thing, darling,--_always remember_--he’d have very soon -put another in _your_ place if it had been you.” [_She finishes the -remark to Mrs. Pampinelli._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Knowingly, and with conviction_] I should say he -would. - -MRS. FELL. [_Reaching for her hand-bag_] And I felt like saying, “And I -could give you the names and addresses right now of _several_ that he -would have put in your place _long ago_, only for the law.” - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With a shade of confidence_] She must have known it. - -MRS. FELL. [_Reflecting the tone_] Of _course_, she knew it. [_Florence -leaves Teddy, up at the piano, and crosses to Ritter and Twiller, to -show them a piece of music. They rise, and she indicates a certain -point on the sheet; then she continues down to Spindler, who rises at -her approach, and shows it to him._] - -MRS. RITTER. How is she, Nelly? - -MRS. FELL. My dear, she looks a perfect wreck. [_Florence sits on the -arm of the arm-chair at the left and Spindler resumes the little chair -below the left door, and drawing it a bit closer to the arm-chair. He -appears to be telling Florence something very interesting._] - -MRS. RITTER. Poor soul. - -MRS. FELL. She says no one will _ever_ know how she feels--about losing -that part. And she says she simply cannot _wait_ until tomorrow night, -[_She turns to Mrs. Pampinelli._] to see Paula’s interpretation of it. -[_Mrs. Ritter gives an inane little laugh, and Mrs. Fell turns quickly -to her._] She’s heard so much about it. [_Jenny comes in from the left -hallway again with fresh glasses. She sets them down on the hallway -table and proceeds to arrange them._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Is she coming to the performance tomorrow night? - -MRS. FELL. She says she’ll see that performance, if she has to disguise -herself. - -MRS. RITTER. Doesn’t that sound just like her? [_Nelly nods agreement._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes,--she’s so full of dramatic instinct. - -MRS. FELL. [_With a touch of bitterness_] He never appreciated it -though. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. My dear, has _any_ artist _ever_ been adequately -appreciated? - -MRS. RITTER. I understand he was very heavily insured. - -MRS. FELL. Oh, yes! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. She _seemed_ very optimistic when I spoke to her on -the telephone. - -MRS. FELL. I believe your husband’s company had him insured for quite a -lot, didn’t they, Paula? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Lowering her tone_] I believe they did, Nelly,--but I -couldn’t say for just how much. - -MRS. FELL. [_Quietly detaching herself_] I must find that out. [_She -passes back of Mrs. Pampinelli and across towards Ritter. Mrs. Ritter -and Mrs. Pampinelli continue in conversation._] Frederick, I want to -ask you something. [_He steps forward, excusing himself to Twiller._] -Pardon me, Ralph. - -TWILLER. That’s all right, Nelly. [_He crosses again to Teddy._] - -MRS. FELL. Frederick, what did you think when you heard Jimmy Sheppard -was dead? - -RITTER. Why, I thought he was dead, of course. [_Mrs. Ritter leaves -Mrs. Pampinelli, passing back of her, and goes up to assist Jenny with -her arrangements. Mrs. Pampinelli busies herself with making notations -on the margin of the manuscript, at the little table._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Flipping the tip of her fan in his face_] Oh, did -you, Smarty! [_Ritter raises his right hand, as though to ward off -the blow._] Well, listen, Frederick. [_He attends, and she becomes -confidential._] He left quite a bit of insurance, didn’t he? - -RITTER. Yes--about three hundred thousand, I believe. - -MRS. FELL. [_Becoming generally stoney_] Is there a will, do you know? - -RITTER. I don’t know; I suppose there is. - -MRS. FELL. Well, I hope she was sharp enough to see that there is. -Because if there isn’t, you know, she’s only entitled to a third -in this state. That’s all the widow’s entitled to. And, you know, -Frederick, Clara Sheppard could never in this world get along on a bare -hundred thousand dollars; you know that as well as I do. - -RITTER. Well, she has quite a bit of money of her own, hasn’t she? - -MRS. FELL. Oh, tons of it, yes; but there’s no sense in using her -own if she can use his. [_Ritter glances at her, but she has turned -away slightly to cough, behind her fan. Jenny goes out at the left -hallway._] Was sudden, wasn’t it? - -RITTER. Yes, it was. - -MRS. FELL. We were terribly inconvenienced. Because I’d simply -_deluged_ my friends with tickets. [_Mrs. Ritter is up at the -punch-bowl, sampling the punch and nibbling at the cakes._] - -RITTER. I can’t understand why you didn’t postpone the show. - -MRS. FELL. That’s what _I_ wanted to do; but Mrs. P. here was -superstitious. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Catching her name, and straightening up from the -manuscript, imperiously_] What are you saying about Mrs. P., Nelly Fell? - -MRS. FELL. Why, Frederick was wondering why we didn’t postpone the -performance when Jimmy Sheppard died,--and _I_ told him you were -superstitious about a postponement. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No, Nelly, I was not superstitious, so please don’t -say that I was; I shouldn’t care to have such an impression get abroad. - -MRS. FELL. [_Touching her hair_] Well, you were something, Betty. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes, Nelly, I admit that I was something,--but it -was not superstitious. I was,--[_She looks out and away off, and feels -for the word._] intuitive. [_She turns her head and looks directly -at Ritter, who drops his eyes to the tip of his cigar. Nelly Fell, -following Mrs. Pampinelli’s eyes, looks at Ritter also. Then everyone’s -eyes shift to Mrs. Pampinelli. Florence turns languidly and looks; and -Mrs. Ritter, with a glass of punch in one hand, and a small cake in the -other, moves forward, in the middle of the room, and stands looking -and listening--and chewing. Hossefrosse steps over to the table behind -which Mrs. Pampinelli is standing, and takes the manuscript,--returning -with it to the arm-chair, and becoming absorbed in a comparison of a -certain page of it with his individual part._] I have struggled so long -to inaugurate a Little Theatre Movement in this community, that I had -intuitively anticipated the occurrence of some obstacle to thwart me; -so that, when the telephone-bell rang, on the night of Mr. Sheppard’s -death, I said to myself, before I even took down the receiver, [_She -plants her lead-pencil on the table and assumes something of the aspect -of a crusader._] “_This_ is my event. Something has happened--that is -going to put my sincerity in this movement to the test. And I must -remember, as Mr. Lincoln said at Gettysburg, ‘It is better that we -should perish, than that those ideals for which we struggle should -perish.’” [_She turns her gaze in the direction of Ritter, but Mrs. -Ritter is first in the line of vision, with her eyes full of the -coast of Greenland, and her mouth full of cake. As she becomes -suddenly conscious that Mrs. Pampinelli has stopped talking and is -looking directly at her, she meets the look and breaks into an utterly -irrelevant little laugh._] - -RITTER. It’s a singular thing, but I’ve noticed that invariably there’s -a _fatality_ connected with these amateur performances. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Unfortunately, that is true, Mr. Ritter, I agree with -you. But then, we are not dismayed; we have the lessons of history -to fortify us; for whenever the torch of essential culture has been -raised, [_She raises the lead-pencil as though it were a torch._] there -has unfailingly been the concomitant exactment of a human life. [_She -stands holding the torch aloft until the little cuckoo-clock over the -door at the left cuckoos the half-hour. Ritter looks at it, and Nelly -Fell gives it a glance. Florence, too, turns and looks up. Then Mrs. -Pampinelli turns her eyes slowly upon it and withers it with a look._] -Well, children, it’s eight-thirty,--[_She gathers up her train and -tosses it across her left arm, then comes around to the right in front -of the table where she has been standing. Mrs. Ritter returns to the -table in the hallway and sets down her empty glass. Ritter goes up -after her and she fills him out a drink. Florence rises from the arm of -the chair, and, passing in front of the table at the left, goes up and -across back of the piano and out the door, at the right. As she passes -above the piano she says something to Teddy, who has come down at the -right of the piano, from his late position up near the door, and is -crossing below it. Twiller turns and goes out through the center-door -and stands leaning over the partition in the right hallway. Hossefrosse -rises, settles his clothes and clears his throat. Mr. Spindler, also, -has risen, and is replacing his chair back against the wall, below the -door._] Time we went “unto the breach” once more. - -MRS. FELL. [_Stepping forward a little to the center of the room, and -stretching her hand towards Mr. Hossefrosse_] You have my props, Huxley. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Crossing below the table, to give her the manuscript_] I -beg your pardon, Nelly; I was just looking at something here. - -MRS. FELL. Thanks. [_She pulls him towards her and whispers something._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Standing at the left of the little table_] Have you -my other pencil, Mr. Spindler? - -SPINDLER. [_Hurrying across towards her_] I believe you left it over -here on this little table. [_He passes below Teddy, who is just -crossing to the left, and continues on between the piano and the table -to the little table below the casement-window. Nelly Fell breaks into a -shrill giggle, pushes Hossefrosse towards the center-door, and crosses -to the left, passing below the table. She is in a violent state of -laughter. Hossefrosse goes on up to the center-door, and, excusing -himself to Ritter, who is standing there drinking, passes out into the -right hallway. Teddy comes around back of the arm-chair at the left -and sits in the arm-chair. Mrs. Pampinelli has moved to the right of -the table below the piano, where she stands reviewing her notes._] - -MRS. FELL. [_To Teddy, confidentially, as she takes up her position on -the chair below the door at the left_] I’ll tell you later. [_She sits -down._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Tapping her lead-pencil on the table and addressing -them generally_] Now, folks,--[_Ritter sets his glass on the table and -steps into the right hallway, where he converses with Twiller for a -second, then stands listening; while Mrs. Ritter hurries in and settles -herself on the partition-seat at the left and listens attentively._] -you understand, of course, that the setting will be just as it was -at the Civic Club on the fourteenth; only, of course, as you know, -the stage at Hutchy Kutchy is considerably larger. That, however, -need not concern us particularly, as the entrances and exits will be -relatively the same. [_She finishes this speech to Mr. Spindler, who -is standing at her right, waiting for her to take the lead-pencil._] -Oh, thank you, Mr. Spindler. [_She gives him the one she has--simply an -exchange of pencils, and he salutes and returns to a position below the -casement-window. Florence comes in at the right door again, wearing her -furs, and comes down at the right of the piano. Mrs. Pampinelli moves a -little towards the center-door._] Are you going to watch the rehearsal, -Mr. Ritter? - -MRS. FELL. Of course, he is! - -RITTER. [_Coming through the center-door_] If I wouldn’t be in the way. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Not at all,--very glad to have you. - -MRS. FELL. He can sit over here with the promptress. [_He crosses -towards Nelly, picking up the little chair above the table at the left, -as he passes. Hossefrosse emerges from the right hallway carrying a -light, soft hat, a cane and gloves, and stands in the center-door. -Florence steps across below the piano and asks Mrs. Pampinelli -something._] If you can behave yourself. [_Florence returns to the -corner of the piano nearest the window and drapes herself on it. She’s -a very gorgeous-looking thing, in a sleeveless gown of canary-colored -metallic silk, made quite daringly severe, to exploit the long, lithe -lines of her greyhound figure. There’s a chain-effect girdle with the -dress, of vivid jade, worn loose, and an ornament of the same jade on -the left shoulder, from which the goods falls in a plain drape down in -front of the arm to the bottom of the skirt. She has a perfect shock of -hair,--rather striking,--a kind of suspicious auburn; and she has it -bobbed. Her slippers and stockings are white._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. You needn’t sit there yet, Teddy, I’m going to run -through the last scene first,-- - -TEDDY. [_Rising_] Oh, all right. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. For Mr. Hossefrosse’s lines. [_Teddy passes in front -of the table at the left and goes up to the center-door and out into -the right hallway, where he chats with Twiller and watches the -proceedings over the partition. Spindler comes over and asks Mrs. -Pampinelli something. Ritter places his chair beside Nelly’s, above it, -and sits down, assuming the attitude of a lover._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Pushing Ritter’s arm away_] Stop it, Frederick Ritter! -Paula! [_Spindler returns to his post._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Inanely_] Behave yourself, Fred. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Now, folks,--[_She moves slowly down and across -towards the table at the left._] Mr. Spindler will attend to the -various cues tonight, and at the performance tomorrow night as well. -[_Speaking directly to Nelly_] So we won’t have to bother about that. -[_Turning round to her left and addressing the others_] He will do all -the rapping. [_She raps a little._] And he has a little telephone-bell -of his own, [_She moves across again towards the back of the table at -the right._] which he has very kindly tendered the use of. Have you -that bell with you tonight, Mr. Spindler? [_He holds out a bell and -battery arrangement on a piece of wood, having taken it from his pocket -immediately she referred to it, and rings it twice._] Splendid. [_She -passes above the table and comes forward at the right of it, very -thoughtfully._] That’s splendid. [_Spindler replaces the battery._] -Now, children,--[_She crosses in front of the table._] I think, -first, I should like to take that scene at the finish, between Doctor -Arlington and his wife; [_She is standing at the left of the table, -speaking directly to Hossefrosse, who is standing in the center-door, -with his hat on, at a rather absurd angle, and holding his cane in -one hand and his gloves in the other, in a very stilted fashion. -Hossefrosse is a terribly well-fed-looking person in dinner clothes, -perhaps, thirty-eight years of age,--flamingly florid of complexion, -and with an effusiveness of manner that is probably only saved from -absolute effervescence by the ponderous counterpoise of his dignity._] -there are a few little things in there I want to correct. [_Crossing -over back of the table at the left towards Mrs. Fell_] Page eighteen or -nineteen, I think it is, Nelly. It’s the scene at the finish between -Mr. Hossefrosse and Miss McCrickett. [_Nelly looks for the place, -through her lorgnon._] Oh! [_Mrs. Pampinelli turns back to the others -again._] and one thing more I want to mention, boys and girls, before -I forget it. [_She takes a funny little coughing spell._] Pardon me. -[_She coughs again._] Oh, dear me! [_She closes her eyes tight and -shivers her head._] - -MRS. FELL. Page eighteen did you say it was, Betty? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Eighteen or nineteen, yes. It’s somewhere right in -there. - -MRS. FELL. Oh, yes, here it is, I have it. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning back to the people, and speaking with -careful emphasis_] When you are going on and off the stage, be -very careful of those little wooden strips that they have across -the bottoms of the doors, and don’t trip. [_Mrs. Ritter laughs -self-consciously and Hossefrosse leans over and says something to her. -Florence laughs, and turns and says something to Spindler, and Teddy -and Twiller laugh and look toward Mrs. Ritter._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Looking out around Mrs. Pampinelli to see Mrs. Ritter_] -Paula! [_Then she sits back, laughing, and says something to Ritter._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I really think that was what made some of you so -nervous at the Civic Club the last time. So, watch it, all of you, -for they will probably have just the same thing down at Hutchy -Kutchy.--There is perhaps nothing quite so disconcerting as to trip--as -one comes on a stage. Going off--is not so bad; but--coming on, I have -found that it requires a _tremendous_ artist to rise above it. [_She -starts down towards the table at the right, below the piano._] So, -watch it, all of you. Now, is everybody in his place? [_She stops below -the table and picks up her note-book._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Handing Ritter the manuscript and getting up suddenly_] -Oh, just one moment, Betty! [_She teeters across to the table at the -right._] I want to get my other glasses--they’re right here in my bag. -[_She picks up the bag and starts back to her place._] I beg pardon, -everybody, but I can’t tell one letter from another without these -glasses. [_This last sentence culminates in a flighty giggle, for no -reason at all, and then she sits down, and heaves a deep sigh of -amusement._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Who has been looking at her steadily_] _Now_, is -everybody ready? [_Mrs. Fell simply lifts her eyes and looks at her; -then proceeds to get her glasses out of the bag._] Use your voices, -children, and try to do it tonight just as you are going to do it -tomorrow night at Hutchy Kutchy. [_She moves a step or two nearer the -middle of the room._] Doctor Arlington is still in his office. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Yes. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Mr. Rush-- - -TWILLER. [_Coming in through the center-door_] Yes. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Is just about to make his exit. [_He crosses above -the piano and stands waiting at the right door. He’s a bald-headed -youth, between thirty and thirty-five, in dinner clothes, excessively -well-groomed but utterly nondescript._] And Mrs. Arlington is putting -on the deadlatch. [_Florence straightens up._] All ready, now? [_She -holds up her hands for a second, then claps them once._] All right. -[_Twiller goes out through the right door and Mrs. Pampinelli moves -over towards the right, watching Florence._] - -FLORENCE. [_Pretending to put on a deadlatch_] Deadlatch. - -SPINDLER. [_Standing in rigid military fashion_] Click--click. -[_Florence turns and starts across towards the middle of the room, -passing between the piano and the table below it._] - -FLORENCE. [_Glancing toward the center-door_] You can come out now, -Clyde, they’ve gone. [_She continues to the table at the left and -stands resting one hand upon it._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Bustling forward from the center-door, removing his -hat as he comes_] Anybody here, David? [_Spindler whistles shrilly, -takes a step forward and tries to attract Hossefrosse’s attention, by -holding up his right arm and flicking his fingers at him. Teddy laughs -and turns to tell Twiller, who is just rejoining him from the right -hallway, what has happened. Florence turns and looks at Hossefrosse, -then at Mrs. Pampinelli, who is standing at the right of the table -below the piano. Mrs. Ritter gets up and simply staggers laughing -through the center-door and out to Teddy and Twiller._] - -FLORENCE. [_Speaking to Mrs. Pampinelli_] That isn’t right, is it? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to Spindler at her right and holding up her -hand_] Please don’t whistle, Mr. Spindler! I can’t stand whistling. - -FLORENCE. I thought we were going to take the _last_ scene first. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and MRS. FELL, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Moving around in front of the table and going - near to Hossefrosse_] We are taking the _last_ scene _first_, Mr. - Hossefrosse, that is the _first_ scene. - - MRS. FELL. [_Holding up her hand_] Wait a moment, wait one moment, - just one moment, somebody’s off the track! [_Twiller and Teddy laugh - again and Hossefrosse turns and looks at them. Twiller shakes his - head, flips his hand at him and walks away into the right hallway, as - though deploring his stupidity. Ritter begins to laugh._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I thought I had made that sufficiently clear. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI, MRS. FELL, SPINDLER and TWILLER, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. We are taking the scene at the finish, Mr. - Hossefrosse, between you and Miss McCrickett. - - MRS. FELL. [_Rising_] That’s the first scene, Huxley, and we are - taking the last scene, between you and Florence, on page nineteen, - right here, [_She indicates the place in the manuscript_]. - - SPINDLER. [_Addressing Teddy_] I hope he doesn’t pull anything like - that tomorrow night. [_He returns to his place below the window._] - - TWILLER. [_Coming back into view from the hallway_] Don’t weaken, - Huxley, you know what they say about a bad rehearsal. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Topping them all_] Please, children, please! - -MRS. FELL. Down at the bottom of the page. [_Mrs. Ritter comes through -the center-door again and sits down on the left partition-seat._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Speaking directly to Mrs. Fell_] Please--[_Mrs. Fell -sits down again, slowly, Mrs. Pampinelli looking at her stonily._] -Let us have one director, if you please. [_She withdraws her eyes -slowly, and Nelly darts a bitter look at her._] Now, don’t let us have -everybody talking at once; it only confuses people, and wastes a lot of -time. [_Hossefrosse stands bewildered in the middle of the room. Mrs. -Pampinelli addresses him directly, speaking with measured emphasis._] -We are taking the _last_ scene _first_, Mr. Hossefrosse: it is the -scene at the finish, between you and Miss McCrickett, just before Paula -comes on,-- - -HOSSEFROSSE. Oh, I beg your pardon! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. And _after_ Mr. Rush has left the stage. - -HOSSEFROSSE. I thought we were beginning right from the beginning. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No, I’d like to run through the _last_ scene _first_, -if you don’t mind; there are a few little things in it I’d like to -correct. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Turning and starting for the center-door_] This was the -wrong entrance for that line, anyway. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. And you won’t need your hat and cane in this scene. - -HOSSEFROSSE. That’s so, too. - -TWILLER. [_Who is standing out just at the right of the center-door_] -I’ll take them, Hux. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Handing him the hat, gloves and cane_] Thanks. [_Turning -to Mrs. Ritter_] I’ll get straightened out after while. [_Paula -laughs._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Now, Florence dear, will you go back? - -FLORENCE. [_Crossing back again to the window_] Certainly. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Crossing back to the right, in front of the table_] -And take it right from Mr. Rush’s exit. - -FLORENCE. [_Looking round at Hossefrosse_] Ready? - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_In the center-door_] Yes, I’m ready. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_To Florence_] Go on. - -FLORENCE. [_Repeating her former business of putting on a deadlatch_] -Deadlatch. - -SPINDLER. [_Having again assumed his rigid military attitude_] -Click--click. [_Florence turns and crosses again between the piano and -the table._] - -FLORENCE. [_With a glance at the center-door_] You can come out now, -Clyde, they’ve gone. [_She continues to her former position at the -right of the little table at the left. Hossefrosse steps resolutely -through the center-door, gives her a wicked look, glances toward the -door at the right, then strides forward and plants himself directly -opposite her, his head thrown back, his eyes ablaze, and his arms -akimbo._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. Did you come here to make a scene! - -FLORENCE. [_Languidly, and without turning_] Have I made one? - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Getting loud_] What are you doing here? - -FLORENCE. [_Raising her hand to enjoin silence_] Sh-sh--[_He turns -abruptly and looks toward the door at the right; then back to her -again._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. I want an explanation of this! - -FLORENCE. [_Turning to him, and rather casually_] So do I. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Standing at the right of the table below the piano_] -Oh, more imperious, Florence dear! [_Florence and Hossefrosse look at -her._] More of this. [_She lifts her shoulders, eyebrows and chin, to -illustrate her idea of the general hauteur of the line._] Much more. - -FLORENCE. [_Vaguely_] Don’t you think she would cry there? [_Mrs. -Pampinelli looks at her steadily for a pause and thinks: then she rests -her lead-pencil on the table and tilts her head a bit to one side._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Do you want to cry there, dear? - -FLORENCE. No, but I can if you want me to. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No,--personally, I think she’s speaking more in anger -than in sorrow. You see, dear, you are impersonating a wronged wife. -Now, you yourself, Florence darling, are an unmarried girl:--it is -difficult for you to realize how excessively annoyed with her husband -a married woman can become. I think I would take it with more _lift_. -More of this, you know. [_She repeats her former illustration._] - -FLORENCE. [_Endeavoring to imitate the manner of delivery, and speaking -in a deep, tragic tone_] So do I. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Perfect. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Turning to Mrs. Pampinelli_] Go on? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes, go on. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Clearing his throat and trying to summon his attack_] -What is your reason for sneaking into my office at this hour? - -FLORENCE. Is it necessary that your wife have a reason for coming to -your office? - -HOSSEFROSSE. You wanted to embarrass Mrs. Rush, that was it, wasn’t it? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Waving her hand toward them with an upward -movement_] Tempo, children! - -FLORENCE. I wanted to meet my rival. - -HOSSEFROSSE. You could have met Mrs. Rush under more candid -circumstances. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Moving around towards them, in front of the table_] -Tempo, children! - -FLORENCE. The present ones suited my purposes better. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Turning away impatiently_] Naturally!--You wanted -a scene! [_He starts over to the right, but Mrs. Pampinelli is -standing right in his way, so he stops short, but maintains the -physical tautness of his character. Florence, too, has turned away, -to the left, and is moving across in front of the table towards the -arm-chair._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Oblivious of Hossefrosse, and still making her -upward waving gesture over his shoulder_] Tempo, Florence! [_Suddenly -becoming conscious that she is obstructing Hossefrosse’s cross, and -stepping below him_] I beg your pardon. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Bowing stiffly_] Not at all. [_He continues over to the -right and stops, right in front of Spindler, and they stand looking -into each other’s eyes; while Mrs. Pampinelli comes up at the left of -the table to the piano._] - -FLORENCE. [_Sitting down in the arm-chair_] I think if I were a scenic -woman I’ve had ample opportunity during the last fifteen minutes to -indulge myself. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Still looking into Spindler’s eyes_] You did I think;-- - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Beckoning to Spindler_] Mr. Spindler. - -HOSSEFROSSE. I had the pleasure of hearing you. - -FLORENCE. Was it a pleasure, Clyde? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and HOSSEFROSSE, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Still beckoning to Spindler_] Mr. Spindler! - - HOSSEFROSSE. [_Whirling around and glaring at Florence_] It appears to - amuse you! [_Spindler steps below Hossefrosse and passes up in front - of him to Mrs. Pampinelli, who whispers something to him._] - -FLORENCE. [_Unfastening her neckpiece_] I have an inopportune sense of -humor. - -HOSSEFROSSE. You should be able to appreciate the situation, you -created it! - -FLORENCE. [_Looking over at him_] I didn’t create her husband. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Making a little gesture of annoyance_] I’m afraid I’m -stuck! [_He tries hard to think, and Mrs. Pampinelli makes a gesture -toward Mrs. Fell to give him the line, but Nelly is occupied in telling -Ritter a story._] But, don’t tell me! [_He feels for the line again, -and Mrs. Pampinelli tries to attract Nelly’s attention._] I guess I’m -gone. [_Suddenly Nelly bursts into a fit of laughing, having made the -point of the story._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What is the line, Nelly? [_Ritter nudges her._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Stopping suddenly in her laughter and hitting him with her -fan_] Stop that! - -RITTER. Get on your job, you’re holding up the show. [_Nelly looks -excitedly toward Mrs. Pampinelli._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What is the line, Nelly, please. - -MRS. FELL. What! Oh, I beg your pardon, is somebody stuck? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Mr. Hossefrosse. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Got another mind-blank. - -MRS. FELL. Oh, well, now, just wait one minute, please, till I see -where I’m at. [_She searches frantically through the manuscript._] Oh, -yes, here it is! [_Ritter indicates a place on the page. She pushes his -arm out of the way._] I didn’t create her husband. [_Teddy and Twiller -laugh._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI, FLORENCE and HOSSEFROSSE, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. No, dear, we’ve just passed that. - - FLORENCE. I’ve already said that, Nelly. - - HOSSEFROSSE. It’s the next line. - -MRS. FELL. [_Vaguely, and looking through her lorgnon and spectacles at -the manuscript_] Oh, have we passed that! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. The next line after the one you just read. - -MRS. FELL. Oh, I see now where we are! The next line after that is, -“You’ve all been listening to a lot of damned, cheap gossip.” - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and HOSSEFROSSE, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. That’s it. - - HOSSEFROSSE. [_To Mrs. Pampinelli_] That certainly is my Jonah line. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. You’ve all been list--[_Spindler goes around to the -right and sits on the piano-stool, looking near-sightedly at the -music._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Turning to Florence, and assuming his character again_] -You’ve all been listening to a lot of damned, cheap gossip! [_He starts -to cross towards the left, passing between the piano and the table, -but Mrs. Pampinelli is right in his way again, so he is obliged to -stop short and wait._] - -FLORENCE. Which should show you that people are talking. [_Mrs. -Pampinelli turns to see why Hossefrosse is not picking up his line._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Stepping out of his way_] I beg your pardon. [_She -circles down at the left of the table again._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Continuing over towards the mantelpiece_] My fault. One -or two old women, perhaps. - -FLORENCE. Will it confine itself to those? - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Turning at the mantelpiece and coming back to the middle -of the room_] Well, I can’t control that. - -FLORENCE. Have you tried? - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Whirling upon her, and literally shouting_] No! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Standing at the right of the table below the piano_] -Excellent. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Turning and bowing briefly to her_] Thank you very much. -[_Resuming the scene with Florence_] And I don’t intend to. People will -always talk; it may as well be at my expense as anybody else’s. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Leaning towards him across the table, and speaking -with poisonous sweetness_] Anybody’s _else_, dear. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Beg pardon? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Would you say anybody’s else; it sounds better. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Turning back again to Florence_] It may as well be at -my expense as anybody else’s. [_Mr. Spindler’s elbow slips off the -piano onto the keyboard, striking a perfectly villainous chord, and -causing everybody to turn and look in that direction._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Mr. Spindler, please. - -SPINDLER. [_Adjusting his goggles, which have been slightly dislodged -by the incident_] I’m sorry. [_Mrs. Pampinelli turns back to -Hossefrosse._] Never mind, Mr. Hossefrosse, it will come. - -FLORENCE. Your position can’t afford it. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Taking a step towards the right_] I’ve given them -nothing to talk about. - -FLORENCE. No? [_He stops abruptly and turns and looks at her._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. What? [_He takes a couple of steps towards her._] - -FLORENCE. [_Rising_] Please, Clyde!--[_She crosses in front of the -table at the left and goes towards him. Mrs. Ritter gets up from the -partition-seat and comes down to the table at the right, below the -piano._] You’re not talking to your office-boy--[_Mrs. Ritter picks -up the little chair from the left of the table and starts back again -towards the center-door._] Let us get to the point. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Very well. - -MRS. RITTER and HOSSEFROSSE, together. - - MRS. RITTER.--Excuse me, Florence. [_Florence bows and smiles._] And - you, too, Mr. Hossefrosse. - - HOSSEFROSSE. What brought you here tonight? [_He turns to see the - cause of the movement behind him._] Don’t mention it. [_Mrs. Ritter - places the chair in front of the partition where she has been sitting, - then crosses to the piano and gets her sewing-basket, returning with - it to the chair and sitting down to sew._] - -FLORENCE. Not to quarrel with you, for one thing. - -HOSSEFROSSE. You wanted to embarrass Mrs. Rush, that was it, wasn’t it? - -FLORENCE. Not at all,--you misunderstood me; I said, “I wanted to -_meet_ Mrs. Rush.” [_Teddy comes in through the center-door from the -right hallway and sits down on the partition-seat at the right. Teddy -is a frail little wisp of a youth around twenty, in dinner clothes. He -has big eyes and good teeth, and laughs on the slightest provocation. -His forehead is defectively high, and his thin hair is plastered back -and brilliantined. His type is always to be found draped upon the -banisters or across the pianos in the houses of the rich,--a kind of -social annoyance, created by wealthy connections and the usual lack of -available men._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. What did you want to meet her for? [_Twiller steps through -the center-door from the right hallway and whispers something to Mrs. -Ritter. She answers him, and he steps out into the hallway and fills -himself out a glass of claret from the bowl, then goes up and sits on -the landing of the stairway and watches the rehearsal._] - -FLORENCE. Why, I thought that we three might--reason together, [_He -holds her eye for a second, then turns away, and reaches in his -various pockets for his cigarettes._] concerning our respective futures. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_In a lowered tone, to Mrs. Pampinelli_] Forgot my -cigarettes. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Never mind, I only want lines. Go on, Florence. -[_Hossefrosse takes an imaginary cigarette from an imaginary case, -replaces the case, taps the cigarette on the back of his hand, puts it -in his mouth, strikes an imaginary match on his shoe, and lights the -cigarette._] - -FLORENCE. I’ve deferred the discussion for a long time, but it may as -well be today as tomorrow. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Your plan didn’t work out very well, did it? - -FLORENCE. Oh, yes, very well indeed; although hardly as I had -anticipated; thanks to _her_ husband and _your_ lies. [_He blows out -the imaginary match and tosses it onto the floor at the right; then -snaps his head around and glares at Florence. Mrs. Pampinelli glances -down onto the floor, as though to assure herself that Mr. Hossefrosse -hasn’t really thrown a lighted match onto the carpet._] You’ve -evidently told this boy here that Mrs. Rush is your wife. - -HOSSEFROSSE. I’ve told him nothing of the kind! [_He starts to cross -again to the right, but Mrs. Pampinelli is again right in his pathway, -standing in front of the table below the piano._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Stepping below him, and going a step or two nearer -Florence_] I beg your pardon. - -HOSSEFROSSE. I beg your pardon. [_He continues over to the table below -the window at the right and stands there, pretending to smoke._] - -FLORENCE. Then, you’ve allowed him to think so. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Looking straight ahead_] That’s business. - -FLORENCE. Perhaps it is. It has at least allowed you to be present -at the passing of Mrs. Rush. [_She turns and goes towards the back. -Mrs. Ritter calls her to her and they start discussing the hang of -Florence’s skirt._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Whirling around_] You are deliberately misinterpreting -this situation! [_He starts to move across towards her, passing between -the piano and table._] Yes you are! It’s perfectly ridiculous that a -physician cannot take a woman patient without being subjected to the -whisperings of a lot of vulgar scandal-mongers! [_Nelly Fell goes -into violent laughter at something Ritter has just finished telling -her. Florence and Mrs. Ritter continue their discussion of the dress, -and Mrs. Pampinelli tries by dint of gesturing to attract Florence’s -attention._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Florence dear, please. - -FLORENCE. [_Turning suddenly, and continuing her lines_] Oh, I beg your -pardon! [_She moves slowly towards the mantelpiece._] This is not a -romantic age, Clyde. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Mrs. Rush is a patient of mine! - -FLORENCE. [_Moving down at the left towards Ritter and Mrs. Fell_] She -may have been originally. [_Mrs. Fell bursts out afresh over something -else that Ritter whispers._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Flicking her finger at Nelly_] Sh-sh-Nelly. - -MRS. FELL. [_To Florence, who is standing looking at her_] I beg your -pardon. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Standing in the middle of the room_] She is _now_! - -FLORENCE. [_Resting one hand on the arm-chair_] I’m not disputing it. -[_He turns away, and stands at the left of the table below the piano._] -But she must have a very persistent malady-- - -MRS. FELL. Just one minute, Flossie--one minute-- - -FLORENCE. That hasn’t responded to a treatment of more than six years-- - -MRS. FELL. Flossie, Flossie, Flossie! [_Florence stops and looks at -her._] Just a minute. [_She looks sharply at her manuscript._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What is the matter, Nelly? - -MRS. FELL. Oh, I beg your pardon, I thought she’d omitted a line. [_To -Florence_] I beg your pardon. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Go on, Florence. [_Ritter says something to Nelly and -she hits him with the manuscript._] - -FLORENCE. Not to speak of the innumerable changes of air that she’s -enjoyed--[_Mrs. Pampinelli, standing over at the right below the piano, -takes quite a little coughing spell, and Mrs. Ritter promptly gets up -and goes to the punch-bowl to fill her out a glass of punch._] at -your expense; and under your personal escort. [_Hossefrosse looks over -at her. She raises her hand understandingly, and starts slowly across -in front of the table towards him._] I have the day and date of the -majority of them. So, you see, your chivalry is a bit trying, under the -circumstances. [_He looks straight ahead and tries to look sullen and -defeated._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Up in the center-door, holding aloft a glass of punch_] -Betty! - -FLORENCE. But, I haven’t come here to reproach you, or to plead for -your return. Not at all. I think you _love_ this woman. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Coming a little further forward_] Betty! [_Mrs. -Pampinelli has another coughing spell._] - -FLORENCE. And in that case, I want to offer you your freedom-- - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Careful, now, children. [_Mrs. Ritter comes forward to -the table at the left and tries to attract Mrs. Pampinelli’s attention -to the glass of punch._] - -FLORENCE. If you want it. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Holding up her forefinger_] One, two, three. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Snapping his head around and shouting at Florence_] -Well, I don’t want it! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Good! - -HOSSEFROSSE. And I see absolutely no occasion for any such talk. [_Mrs. -Fell drops her bag and reaches for it._] - -FLORENCE. You are probably more broad-minded than I. [_Nelly Fell -utters a piercing little shriek, having almost fallen off the chair -in reaching to pick up her bag. Everyone turns and looks, and Teddy -laughs, as usual._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What’s the matter, Nelly? - -MRS. FELL. [_Straightening up, with Ritter’s assistance, and laughing_] -I nearly fell off the chair. [_Mrs. Ritter laughs and returns to the -center-door and stands._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Go on, Florence. - -FLORENCE. And, really, I don’t think your freedom would be a very -good thing for you. You have a form of respectability that requires -a certain anchorage in the conventions. But unless you can reconcile -yourself in the future to a more literal observance of those -conventions, I shall be obliged to insist that you _take_ your freedom. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Look at her, Mr. Hossefrosse. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Beg pardon? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With a touch of impatience_] Look at her! [_She -begins to cough again._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. Oh, yes, yes! [_He turns and glares at Florence, who is -standing just a couple of feet away from him._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Holding the glass of punch aloft again_] Betty! - -FLORENCE. I have a couple of growing boys,--[_Mrs. Pampinelli passes -right up between Florence and Hossefrosse to Mrs. Ritter, and takes the -glass of claret._] who are beginning to ask me questions which I find -too difficult to answer: and I will neither lie to them--nor allow -them to pity me. - -HOSSEFROSSE. What do you want me to do? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Handing the claret-glass back to Paula, who goes to -the bowl and refills it, and the note-book and pencil to Teddy_] Just -a moment. [_She turns and comes forward in the middle of the room. -Florence turns and moves over to the table at the left, and Hossefrosse -remains standing at the table at the right._] Just one moment. Listen, -Florence dear. [_She uses her handkerchief, then stuffs it into the -bosom of her dress._] I want you, if you can, to make just a little -bit more of that last line. Within the limits of the characterization, -of course; but if you can _feel_ it, I’d like you to give me just the -barest suggestion of a tear. Not too much; but just enough to show -that,--under all her courage--and her threatening, she is still a -woman--and a Mother. You see what I mean, dear? - -FLORENCE. More emotion. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. In that last line. You are doing splendidly, darling, -[_Turning to Hossefrosse_] both of you; [_He acknowledges his -excellence with a short bow._] but I have always _felt_ that that last -line--was really the _big_ moment--of the play. It seems to me--[_She -toys with her necklace, narrows her eyes and looks away off._] that it -is there--that she makes her big plea, for her boys, for her home,--for -every woman’s home. And even though that plea _is_ made in the form of -a threat,--somehow or other--I seem to hear her saying, sub-vocally, -of course, “In God’s _name, don’t_ make it necessary for me to do -this thing!” [_She concludes this speech rather dramatically, her arms -outstretched. Mr. Spindler, at this point, engaged in a too curious -examination of the keyboard, accidentally touches D flat above High -C. Everybody turns and looks at him, but his consciousness of guilt -does not permit of his meeting their eyes, so he remains bent over the -keyboard in precisely the attitude he was in when he struck the note._] - -MRS. FELL. Oh, go away from that piano, Mr. Spindler! [_Mrs. Ritter -comes forward at the left with a dish of cakes and a glass of claret._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Withdrawing her eyes witheringly from Spindler and -turning back to Florence_] Do you see what I mean, dear? - -FLORENCE. I think I do. Do you want me to go back? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No, that’s quite all right. We’ll take it right from -Mr. Hossefrosse’s line, [_She turns toward Hossefrosse. And Mrs. Ritter -takes advantage of the circumstance to offer Florence a cake; which, of -course, is declined with thanks. Then she turns to Mrs. Pampinelli and -waits till the lady has finished directing Hossefrosse._] “What do you -want me to do?” [_Mrs. P. turns back, to be confronted with the cakes -and claret; and she takes both. Then she and Paula move back towards -the center-door._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Clearing his throat_] What do you want me to do? [_Paula -gives a shriek of laughter, at something Mrs. Pampinelli whispers to -her. Then Paula goes out through the center-door and offers Twiller, -who is still sitting half-way up the stairs, some cake, which he -accepts, and then Teddy, who declines, and finally, after taking -another one herself, sets the plate down on the hallway table and -resumes her chair up at the left; while Mrs. Pampinelli, cake and -claret in hand, wanders forward at the right, passing over between the -piano and the table below it._] - -FLORENCE. I’ve already told you. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Then, I suppose I’m simply to decline all women patients -in the future, [_She makes a little sound of amusement._] or else -submit them for general approval. [_He now presses the imaginary fire -out of the cigarette on the imaginary tray on the table._] - -FLORENCE. Stick to your guns, Clyde. - -HOSSEFROSSE. That’s the only thing I see to do. [_Mrs. Pampinelli -stands over at the right watching the scene, and eating and drinking._] - -FLORENCE. Your tenacity is commendable, but it’s a lost cause. -[_Looking at him steadily_] I appreciate your embarrassment-- - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Turning to her, thrusting his hands into his -coat-pockets, tilting his chin, and looking at her with an absurdly -perky expression_] I’m not embarrassed. - -FLORENCE. Desolation, then. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Snapping his fingers at her_] Ha! [_He swings rather -jauntily across and up towards the mantelpiece._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. More nonchalance in the cross, Mr. Hossefrosse. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Turning to her suddenly_] Me? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. More savoir faire, as we say in French. [_She -illustrates the idea with a kind of floating gesture of the hand._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. I see. [_He continues over to the left and down towards -Ritter and Mrs. Fell, endeavoring to execute Mrs. Pampinelli’s idea -by raising his shoulders, stiffening his arms, throwing his head back -and swinging his legs, as he walks. Nelly Fell is whispering something -to Ritter behind her fan, so that, when Hossefrosse reaches them, he -is obliged to touch Ritter on the shoulder and suggest with a nod and -a smile that the exigencies of the play require that he shall sit -where Ritter is sitting. So Ritter jumps up and tiptoes across in -front of the table and up to the piano, where he stands leaning--and -watching--particularly Mrs. Pampinelli._] - -FLORENCE. [_Moving to the table below the piano_] But, I shall be -magnanimous; having loved and lost myself. So that, really, it may not -be nearly so difficult as you imagine. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Sitting on the chair vacated by Ritter_] Well, I can’t -say that I relish the prospect, with any such misunderstanding as this -between us. - -FLORENCE. [_Crossing to the table at the left_] It’s the portion of -half the world, Clyde. [_Twiller gets up from the stairs and comes down -into the right hallway, where he stands watching._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Trying to look sullen, by resting one elbow on his knee -and hunching his shoulders_] It certainly isn’t a very inviting one. -[_Nelly Fell starts to whisper something in his ear._] - -FLORENCE. But it has its compensations. [_Mrs. Pampinelli, having -finished her cake and claret, sets the empty glass down on the table -below the piano and uses her handkerchief._] You’ll have your memories, -and I shall have the wisdom of disillusionment;--[_The telephone-bell -rings, up in the left hallway. Mrs. Ritter jumps up, places her -sewing-basket on the chair, and, touching her hair, comes forward -quickly at the right to the table below the piano._] as well as the -consciousness of lots of company. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Speaking directly to Mrs. Pampinelli_] Is that my cue? -[_Florence stops and turns and looks at her._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Which cue, dear? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Taking a step towards Florence, and with a little -questioning, bewildered gesture_] The telephone is my cue, isn’t it? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With a touch of impatience_] No, darling, you’re not -on in this scene at all. Go on, Florence. [_Mrs. Ritter puts her hand -to her cheek and looks from one to the other in puzzled embarrassment._] - -FLORENCE. [_Turning and resuming her lines to Hossefrosse, who, by this -time, is deep in conversation with Mrs. Fell_] For there are a million -women exactly like me. [_Mrs. Ritter bursts out laughing. So does -Teddy. Twiller reaches over the partition and flips Teddy on the head -with his handkerchief. Jenny appears in the left hallway to answer the -telephone._] - -MRS. RITTER and FLORENCE, together. - - MRS. RITTER. [_Turning to Mrs. Pampinelli_] Oh, I beg your pardon! - [_She leans across the table explaining to Mrs. Pampinelli, who tries - politely to silence her by suggestion that the scene is in progress._] - I thought that was my cue. - - FLORENCE--Secondary women. [_She moves around above the table and - stands just above Hossefrosse._] So don’t look so tragic; you haven’t - lost anything but a lot of time; - -JENNY. [_At the telephone_] Hello? - -MRS. RITTER, FLORENCE and MRS. FELL, together. - - MRS. RITTER.--I was thinking of something else, you know, and when I - heard the telephone, I thought it was for me. - - FLORENCE.--And that’s always lost when it’s spent on things that are - insusceptible of conclusion. - - MRS. FELL. [_Bursting into a perfect shriek of laughter at something - Hossefrosse has just finished telling her, and pushing him away from - her_] Huxley Hossefrosse, you are perfectly dreadful! [_He laughs, - too, and attempts to tell her something else, but she turns away and - waves him aside._] No, No, No. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No dear, that is your own telephone. - -JENNY. [_At the telephone still_] Just a minute. [_Mrs. Ritter turns -towards the back of the room._] - -MRS. RITTER. Oh, so it is! [_Directly to Ritter_] I knew I had one -telephone cue. [_She goes laughing through the center-door and on out -into the right hallway._] - -JENNY. [_Trying to attract Ritter’s attention_] MR. RITTER! [_But -Ritter is absorbed in watching Hossefrosse. Florence stands waiting -for Hossefrosse and Nelly to stop laughing, but as it doesn’t look as -though they will ever stop, she gives Hossefrosse a little dig in the -shoulder with her finger. He straightens up abruptly._] - -FLORENCE. [_Prompting him_] I’ve lost her. - -JENNY. Mr. Ritter! - -HOSSEFROSSE. I’ve lost her. - -FLORENCE. That was inevitable in your case, Clyde; you have a -conventional soul. [_Jenny asks Teddy in pantomime to attract Ritter’s -attention._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_In a tone intended to express abysmal despair_] I’ve -lost you. [_Ritter bursts out laughing. Teddy reaches out and indicates -that he is wanted on the telephone. Jenny holds the telephone up, and -he steps quickly out into the hallway to take it from her._] - -FLORENCE. That was incidental, eh? - -HOSSEFROSSE. But, it seems to me there should be some other way. - -FLORENCE. [_Moving to the right, above the table_] There is, my dear -boy,--for lots of people---- - -RITTER. [_at the telephone_] Hello? [_Jenny goes out._] - -FLORENCE. But not for you. - -RITTER. Yes. - -FLORENCE. You’re too respectable--Physically, I mean. [_She laughs a -little, and stands above the table looking at him._] - -RITTER. Well, wait a minute, I’ll talk to you upstairs. [_He sets the -telephone down and starts towards the right to go upstairs. As he -passes the center-door he speaks to Teddy, who is still sitting just -inside the center-door on the right partition-seat._] Hang that up -when I get on, will you, Teddy? [_Teddy jumps up and goes out to the -telephone, and holds it, waiting till Ritter gets on the extension -upstairs._] - -FLORENCE. And Mrs. Rush has what it appears to me to be a -rather--primitive husband--[_Hossefrosse gives her a narrow look._] and -you have a very modern wife. So be wise, Clyde; you know what usually -happens to him who “loves the danger.” [_There is a loud knock at the -right door. Hossefrosse jumps to his feet and stands looking fearfully -toward it. Florence assumes all the dignity at her command, drawing -herself up, placing her right hand upon her throat, her left on her -hip, and waiting,--the proud but outraged wife. Mrs. Pampinelli holds -up both hands and looks in the direction of the door, to impress -everybody with the dramatic value of the situation. Teddy hangs up the -receiver and stands watching her. Nelly Fell straightens up briskly and -sits watching the door, in expectant attention. Then Mrs. Pampinelli -makes a gesture to Florence to go on with her lines._] Go into your -office, I’ll talk to this woman. [_Hossefrosse drops his head and -shoulders and slinks across in front of the table, a beaten man. He -continues up to the center-door and out, into the right hallway. -The knock is repeated at the right door. Mrs. Pampinelli motions -to Teddy that that is his cue to open the door. He comes through -the center-door and crosses above the piano to the right door, Mrs. -Pampinelli at the same time moving over to the arm-chair at the right -and enshrining herself. Teddy opens the door; and Mrs. Ritter swishes -in self-consciously. Nelly Fell and Mr. Twiller give a little ripple -of applause, but Mrs. Pampinelli holds one finger up toward Nelly and -shushes her. Mrs. Ritter is wearing a rather bizarre-looking hat, -set at something of a challenging angle, and as she comes forward at -the right of the piano, she bursts into a self-conscious giggle. But -Mrs. Pampinelli reproves her with a look. So she controls herself and -crosses below the piano, Teddy, simultaneously, crossing above the -piano. She stops at the corner of the piano and rests her left hand -upon it. Then she places her right hand upon her hip, and, tilting her -head back, looks at Teddy, who has stopped directly above her. Ritter -appears on the stairway, and moves down a step or two, watching his -wife, narrowly._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Flipping her left hand at Teddy, in an attempt to give a -fly impression_] Hello, kid. - -TEDDY. Hello, Mrs. Arlington. [_Mrs. Ritter swishes down towards the -left, shaking her head from side to side and holding her arms akimbo. -She turns around to her left, gives Florence a look, supposed to be a -very contemptuous look, and stands in the middle of the room again, -facing Teddy._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Speaking directly to Teddy_] Is my sweetie in? [_Ritter -moves slowly down to the landing of the stairs, watching his wife as -though she were some baffling phenomenon._] - -TEDDY. No, mam, he ain’t. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Drawing her shoulders up, and speaking in a high -unnatural key_] What! - -TEDDY. He went about six o’clock. - -MRS. RITTER. Why, I had an appointment with _him_! - -TEDDY. He might be back, maybe. - -MRS. RITTER. But, I can’t wait unless I’m _certain_ that he’s coming -back. - -TEDDY. He was expecting you. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Still shaking her head and trying generally to appear -bold_] Yes, I know he was. [_Turning to the table at the left, back of -which Florence is standing_] I suppose I’d better leave a note for him. -[_She indicates the table with a waving gesture of her left hand._] - -TEDDY. You’ll find that green one is the best pen. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Stepping to the table_] Thanks. [_She looks at Florence, -who gives her a withering look over her right shoulder and turns away -to the mantelpiece at the left. Then Mrs. Ritter gives her idea of a -scornful laugh._] Ha! Ha! Ha! - -RITTER. [_Sweeping his hand across his brow, groaning, and falling down -the stairs, into the right hallway_] Oh my God! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Seeing him fall, and jumping up_] Oh, my dear! -[_Everybody turns._] - -TWILLER. [_Trying to catch him_] Hold it! [_Spindler rushes past Mrs. -Pampinelli and out the center-door into the right hallway. Teddy jumps -into a kneeling position on the right partition-seat and looks over the -partition. Florence and Mrs. Fell rush up to the center-door and try -to see what’s going on, Nelly dodging from one side of Florence to the -other, and peering through her lorgnon._] Are you hurt, old man? - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Handing his cane and gloves to Spindler_] Hold those, -please. [_Spindler takes them, and Hossefrosse prepares to assist -Twiller to lift Ritter from the floor._] - -TWILLER. Get some water, somebody! [_Spindler rushes out the left -hallway. Mrs. Pampinelli sweeps up from below the table at the right to -the center-door._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Bewildered, in the middle of the room, as Mrs. -Pampinelli passes her_] What is it, Betty? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Now, don’t get excited, Paula. [_Mrs. Ritter steps -frantically across to the piano and turns, leaning against it, looking -wide-eyed at Nelly Fell._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. Lift up his head. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Looking eagerly out into the right hallway_] Is he -hurt, boys? - -TWILLER. I want to get him under the arms. [_They lift Ritter onto a -bench in the hallway. Nelly Fell turns away from the center-door with -an exclamation of distress._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. We’d better lay him right here. - -MRS. RITTER. Is it Fred, Nelly? - -MRS. FELL. I don’t know, dear. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and MRS. FELL, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Addressing Hossefrosse and Twiller_] You can lay - him right here, boys, I think it’ll be as good as any. - - MRS. FELL. What is it, Florence, did Mr. Ritter fall downstairs? - -FLORENCE. I think so. - -MRS. FELL. [_Covering her eyes and swaying_] Oh, dear child, don’t! -[_Florence puts her arm around her and guides her towards the arm-chair -at the left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Give me one of those pillows, Teddy. [_He hands her a -pillow from the partition-seat where he’s kneeling._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Sinking into the arm-chair at the left_] Betty, I think -I’m going to faint! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to her_] Sit down, dear, I’ll get you some -water. [_Calling and beckoning out into the left hallway_] Jenny dear! -come here, please! - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Rushing across from the right to the left hallway_] I -think I’d better call Dr. Wentworth. [_He snatches up the telephone and -works the hook violently._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes, I would. [_She turns around to her left and -stands looking questioningly at Mrs. Ritter._] Go on with your lines, -Paula. - -MRS. RITTER. Well, is he _dead_, Betty? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With a definite little gesture of her right hand_] -Never mind! [_The curtain commences to descend, and she sweeps -forward._] We will go right on from where Mr. Ritter fell downstairs. - - -THE CURTAIN IS DOWN - -AS IT RISES AGAIN FOR THE PICTURE - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_At the telephone_] Landsdowne 8, please,--right away! -[_Spindler rushes in from the left hallway carrying a glass of water, -and followed immediately by Jenny. Twiller is ministering to Ritter. -Mrs. Pampinelli is standing in the middle of the room, facing the -center-door, and holding up both her hands, as a signal to the various -artists that the rehearsal is about to be resumed; so they quickly -step to the various positions in which they respectively were when Mr. -Ritter fell._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Addressing Teddy_] Yes, I know he was. I s’pose I’d -better leave a note for him. - - -END OF THE ACT - - - - -THE TORCH-BEARERS--ACT II. - - -NOTE: - -The setting for this act consists simply of three wings set in the -middle of the stage about four feet from the footlights, and parallel -to the footlights, the wing in the middle, a plain one, and the one on -either side of it, a door-wing. These doors open toward the footlights, -and the one on the right is hinged to the right, and the one on the -left, to the left. From these door-wings, regular plain wings oblique -off to the back wall; and the whole thing is lashed and stage-screwed -after the fashion of regulation stage-setting. As the doors in the back -flat open, there can be had a glimpse of footlights, and just beyond -them, a neutral drop, in grayish black, to represent an auditorium. -Between the back flat and the stage footlights, (as distinguished from -the regular footlights) the miniature stage is set to represent the -interior of a doctor’s waiting-room. Through the door at the right -can be seen a desk and revolving chair, and a couple of plain chairs -against the wall; and through the left door, a table, littered with -magazines, a cabinet, a revolving bookcase and two more chairs. There -is a bright rug on the floor. Between the back flat and the regular -footlights, over toward the left, there is a stage-screw sticking right -up out of the floor; and between the two doors there is a plain chair -with its back against the flat. Over the door on the right, there is -a row of six electric bulbs with a cord and button depending from it; -and further right, half-way back, there is a wood-wing, set as though -it were the exterior backing for a window in the miniature set. Over at -the left, away back, fastened about head-high against the back wall, -there is a small switchboard-arrangement. Just below this there is an -old chair, without a back, with a newspaper lying upon it. - - -THE TORCH-BEARERS--ACT II. - -_A waltz is being played somewhere off at the right. Florence and Mrs. -Ritter are standing in the middle of the stage, facing the flats, -talking. Florence is wearing a fawn-colored, one-piece coat-dress, -buttoned high at the throat, military fashion, and a toque made of -wine-colored velvet leaves. She wears fawn-colored slippers and -stockings, and carries a fitch muff. Mrs. Ritter is wearing a very -rich-looking coat-suit in blue serge, trimmed at the collar and cuffs -with white monkey-fur. Her hat is dark-blue felt, quite large, with -a bird of paradise set at a decidedly rakish tilt. Her slippers and -stockings are black, and she carries an umbrella. Over at the extreme -left, and forward, Mrs. Fell is hearing Mr. Twiller read his lines -from the manuscript. Mrs. Fell is gowned in a brilliant creation of -silver-cloth trimmed with sea-green satin. There are numerous strings -of crystal beads hanging in the front from the waist to the bottom of -the skirt, and she has a spreading poinsetta in scarlet velvet fastened -at her waist. There is a long, fish-tail train to the gown, lined with -the green satin, and she has a heavy rope of pearls and sea-green beads -around her neck, from which her lorgnon depends. There are diamonds in -her hair, diamonds galore upon her arms and hands, and she’s wearing -her diamond dog-collar. Her slippers and stockings are of pale green. -Mr. Twiller has on a double-breasted blue-serge suit, a black derby, -black shoes and fawn-colored spats, and a perfectly villainous-looking -black mustache, absurdly large, and obviously artificial. He stands -leaning upon a cane, reciting his lines to Mrs. Fell. Mr. Spindler, -in a dinner-suit, is trying desperately to unfasten the stage-screw -from the floor at the left, while Mr. Hossefrosse, wearing a light -business-suit, a light, soft hat, tan shoes and spats, and carrying a -cane and gloves, is pacing back and forth between the left door and the -extreme left, reciting his lines to himself. He is atrociously made up, -with the carmine smeared heavily on his cheek-bones. The stage manager, -in a tan jumper and army shirt, dirty white running-pumps, a battered -old cap adorned with many tobacco-tags, and carrying a hammer, wanders -on from the right and crosses the stage, passing below Florence and -Mrs. Ritter, who turn and look at him curiously, and continues on up -at the left to the switch-board, where he picks up the newspaper from -the broken chair, and, after lighting his pipe, sits down to read. He -is apparently disgusted with the world and utterly oblivious of his -surroundings. The waltz-music stops, and Mr. Hossefrosse comes to a -halt in his pacing, right outside the left door. It is instantly flung -open, knocking him toward the left, and disarranging his hat, and Mrs. -Pampinelli sweeps out--in a princess-gown of ruby-colored velvet, with -a long train, and heavily trimmed about the upper part of the bodice -with ornaments of ruby-colored beads. Her shoulders and arms are bare, -and she has a small string of rubies about her throat;--a bracelet and -several rings of rubies; as well as a high Spanish comb studded with -rubies. Her slippers are of black velvet. Mrs. Ritter gives a little -cry as Mr. Hossefrosse is struck by the door._ - - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Holding the door ajar_] Oh, did I hit you, Mr. -Hossefrosse! I’m so sorry. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Settling his hat_] That’s all right. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_To the ladies_] The setting looks splendid, girls! -[_Crossing quickly below Hossefrosse towards the left_] Will you come -here for a moment, Mr. Spindler? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Turning away to the right_] I don’t want to see it till -I go on. - -FLORENCE. [_As Hossefrosse comes towards her_] You’d better keep away -from that door, Mr. Hossefrosse. [_She and Mrs. Ritter laugh._] - -HOSSEFROSSE and MRS. PAMPINELLI, together. - - HOSSEFROSSE. Yes, I think I had. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Up at the left, addressing the stage manager_] Are - you ready, Mr. Stage Manager? [_He continues to read._] - -HOSSEFROSSE and MRS. PAMPINELLI, together. - - HOSSEFROSSE. [_Brushing his clothes_] I don’t think a whisk-broom’d be - out of place on this stage, either. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to Spindler, who is still occupied with the - stage-screw_] Mr. Spindler, will you come here, please? [_Turning back - to the stage manager_] Mr. Stage Manager! [_Spindler goes towards her, - and Hossefrosse goes through the left door._] - -STAGE MANAGER. [_Looking up from his paper, very peevishly_] Yes? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Are you all ready? - -STAGE MANAGER and TWILLER, together. - - STAGE MANAGER. Yes, sure, I’m all ready. [_He resumes his newspaper._] - - TWILLER. [_Turning sharply to Spindler, who has stopped on his way to - Mrs. Pampinelli to call Mrs. Fell’s attention to the stage-screw, and - to warn her to be careful of it_] Oh, go away! Can’t you see we’re - busy. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Mr. Spindler! - -SPINDLER. [_Stepping briskly to her side_] Yes, mam? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Come here, please. [_Turning to the stage manager_] -Mr. Stage Manager--[_He looks up._] This young man will give you the -cue for the curtain, in case I am not here. - -STAGE MANAGER. All right. [_He resumes his newspaper._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning and coming forward again, holding her skirt -up off the floor_] You stand right here, Mr. Spindler, and I’ll give -you the signal when I’m ready. - -SPINDLER. All right. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Hurrying towards the left door_] Now, is everybody -all right? - -FLORENCE. Yes. - -MRS. RITTER. I think so. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. How are _you_, Paula? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Giggling_] All right. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Where’s Mr. Hossefrosse? [_She glances frantically -about._] - -FLORENCE and MRS. RITTER, together. - - FLORENCE. He’s just stepped on the stage. - - MRS. RITTER. He was here a minute ago. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Mr. Hossefrosse, where are you! [_She opens the left -door._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Calling_] Mr. Hossefrosse! [_He opens the right door and -comes out._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. Yes? - -TEDDY and MRS. PAMPINELLI, together. - - TEDDY. [_Sitting at the desk over at the right, in the miniature set - beyond the flats, to Mrs. Pampinelli, as she comes through the left - door_] There he is. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_To Teddy, as she steps into the miniature set, - through the left door_] Where’s Mr. Hossefrosse? - -FLORENCE and MRS. RITTER, together. - - FLORENCE. [_To Hossefrosse_] Mrs. Pampinelli’s looking for you. - - MRS. RITTER. [_Calling_] Here he is, Mrs. Pampinelli! [_Hossefrosse - steps quickly to the left door and starts in, just as Mrs. Pampinelli - comes out through the right door. Florence steps over to the left door - and catches Hossefrosse by the arm, and pulls him back._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Coming through the right door_] Where _is_ he? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Pointing to Hossefrosse_] There he is! [_She laughs._] - -FLORENCE. [_Drawing Hossefrosse back_] Mrs. Pampinelli wants you! - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_To Mrs. Pampinelli_] I beg your pardon. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Oh, Mr. Hossefrosse! - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Crossing to the right towards her_] Yes? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Are you all right? - -HOSSEFROSSE. I think so, yes. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. How is your make-up? - -HOSSEFROSSE. All right, I think. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Indicating the right door_] Would you stand here for -a moment under this light until I see it? - -HOSSEFROSSE. Certainly. [_He goes to the right door and stands with -his back against it. The light from the row of electric bulbs over the -door shines down on his face. Mrs. Pampinelli stands off to his right, -surveying his make-up critically._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Very good. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Not too much red? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No, I shouldn’t say so. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Indicating his right cheek_] Up here, I mean. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No, I think the contour of your face requires it. It -heightens the expression. [_She starts across towards the left._] It’s -very good. [_Hossefrosse comes over and chats with the ladies about his -make-up._] Mr. Twiller! [_Twiller turns from Mrs. Fell._] - -TWILLER. Yes? [_Turning back to Mrs. Fell_] Excuse me, Nelly. - -MRS. FELL. Certainly. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. How is your mustache? - -TWILLER. [_Touching it gingerly_] All right, I think. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Is it quite secure? - -TWILLER. I think so. [_Mrs. Ritter, Florence and Hossefrosse turn and -look._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Stepping back a step from him and looking at the -mustache, with her head tilted a bit to the left side_] You’ve made it -a little smaller, haven’t you? - -TWILLER. [_Touching the left side of his mustache_] I cut it down a bit -on this side. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I thought you had. - -TWILLER. I was a little conscious of it. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well,--I don’t know but that it’s better for the -characterization. - -TWILLER. And how are my eyes? [_He turns and looks out and away off, -widening his eyes as though he were having his picture taken._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_After looking keenly at his eyes for a second_] Very -effective. [_She turns quickly away towards the right, and Twiller -turns back to his left to Mrs. Fell._] Now, is everybody ready? [_They -all smile and nod._] Your gloves and cane, Mr. Hossefrosse? - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Crossing above Florence and Mrs. Ritter towards Mrs. -Pampinelli, extending his cane and gloves_] Yes. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning towards Mrs. Fell_] Places, Nelly! Get -ready, Mr. Spindler! - -SPINDLER. I’m all ready. [_Mrs. Fell closes the manuscript, excuses -herself to Twiller, and crosses, above him, towards the right. He goes -back at the left and says something to Spindler, then comes forward -again._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Calling through the left door_] Are you all right, -Teddy? - -TEDDY. [_Beyond the flats, over at the right_] All right. [_As Mrs. -Fell passes above Florence and Mrs. Ritter, on her way over to -the right, she whispers something to them which causes a general -laugh:--then she continues on over to the door at the right and takes -up her official position, as promptress._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning and addressing them generally_] Now, is -everybody all right? [_They all nod._] You both all right, girls? -[_Mrs. Ritter nods._] - -FLORENCE. All right. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning around to the left to Mr. Spindler, and with -an authoritative gesture_] All right, then--take up the curtain! - -SPINDLER. [_Waving his hand to the stage manager_] All right, Stage -Manager! - -STAGE MANAGER. [_Getting up, very reluctantly_] Are you ready? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and SPINDLER, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes, all ready. - - SPINDLER. Let her go! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With a kind of ceremonious flourish of the hand_] -Take up the curtain! [_The stage manager tosses his newspaper onto -the chair and steps out of sight, to the left. There is an anxious -pause. Then Mrs. Pampinelli starts violently and grabs the knob of the -left door._] Oh, wait one moment! [_Spindler rushes back at the left, -whistling._] - -FLORENCE, MRS. RITTER, TWILLER and HOSSEFROSSE, together, [_as Mrs. -Pampinelli pulls open the left door._] - - FLORENCE. Wait a minute! - - MRS. RITTER. Oh, wait! - - TWILLER. Hold it! - - HOSSEFROSSE. [_Grabbing the door and holding it open_] Not yet! - -MRS. RITTER. [_Calling to the stage manager_] Just a minute! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Going in through the left door_] One moment, please! -[_She vanishes to the right, and there is a slight pause, during which -the curtain, which had been raised four feet, can be seen through the -door to descend again. They all exchange looks of distress and amused -annoyance. Then Mrs. Pampinelli hurries out through the door again._] -All right! - -SPINDLER. [_Who has come forward at the left_] Is it all right? -[_Hossefrosse releases the door and it closes._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes, it’s all right. [_Spindler goes towards the back -at the left and she follows him half-way._] - -SPINDLER. All right, Mr. Stage Manager! - -STAGE MANAGER. [_Off at the left_] Are you ready? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and SPINDLER, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes, all ready, Mr. Stage Manager! - - SPINDLER. Let her go! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning and coming forward at the left_] Take it -up! [_She stands just to the left of the left door, peering through -the flats. Spindler is farther back at the left, peering, also; and -Mrs. Fell is over at the right door, peering. There is a pause. Mr. -Hossefrosse takes up his position outside the left door, preparatory to -making his entrance. He settles his clothes generally, and clears his -throat._] The curtain is going up, Mr. Hossefrosse, go on. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Is it up? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes, yes, go on! [_He opens the door, rather -magnificently, and swings in. There is a ripple of applause, and the -door closes after him; and they all try to find a crevice between the -flats that will afford a glimpse of the stage beyond. The stage manager -appears from the left carrying a regulation door-slam, which he brings -forward and drops, with a bang, just to the left of the left door. They -all turn and look at him, in resentful astonishment, but he simply -gives them a look of infinite disdain and returns to his chair at the -back to read._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Beyond the flats_] Anybody here, David? - -TEDDY. [_Beyond the flats, over toward the right_] No, sir. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Beyond the flats, moving towards the right_] No -telephones? - -TEDDY. No, sir. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Coming through the right door, without his hat_] Nothing -at all, eh? [_Mrs. Ritter is standing right in front of the door._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Get away from the door, Paula! [_Paula jumps to the -left. Mrs. Fell takes advantage of the crevice caused by the door -being open, to try to see the audience._] - -TEDDY. [_Who can be seen through the open door standing at the desk_] -No, sir. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Leaning over and laying his cane and gloves on the chair -between the doors_] All right, sir. [_The door begins to swing to -behind him._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Keep that door open, Mr. Hossefrosse! [_Spindler comes -forward at the left to see what’s the matter. Hossefrosse thrusts his -foot back and kicks the door open._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. And I think that will do very nicely for this day. [_The -door begins slowly to swing to again._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. There it goes again, Mr. Hossefrosse! - -HOSSEFROSSE. It won’t _stay_ open! [_Mrs. Fell looks around the door._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Take hold of that door, Nelly! [_Nelly puts one foot -around it, and stands looking at her manuscript. Spindler goes back at -the left and looks through the wings again, at the stage._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_In a frantic whisper_] Telephone! - -MRS. FELL. Telephone, somebody! - -HOSSEFROSSE. Good Lord! - -FLORENCE. Mr. Spindler, telephone! [_Spindler rushes forward at the -left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Where is he? - -SPINDLER. What? - -FLORENCE. The telephone-bell! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Where’s your bell? - -SPINDLER. [_Pulling the battery-arrangement out of his pocket_] Has the -cue been given? - -TEDDY. [_Picking up the telephone on the desk beyond the flats_] Hello? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Ring it! Of course it’s been given! [_He rings the -bell, and Hossefrosse steps through the right door and watches Teddy -anxiously._] - -SPINDLER. I didn’t hear it! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Annihilating him with a look, and starting over -towards the right door_] Well, why aren’t you over here when your cue’s -given and then you would hear it! [_Spindler trails over after her._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Over his shoulder, to Mrs. Pampinelli_] Shush! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning sharply back towards the left, and directly -to Spindler, who is right behind her_] Shush! [_She passes below him -and continues towards the left._] Keep away from that door, they’ll see -you! [_In attempting to keep out of the way of the door, Spindler turns -sharply and trips over the screw of a stage-brace, falling his length -across the open door. Mrs. Ritter gives a little scream, and Mrs. -Pampinelli whirls round and glares at him. He scrambles to his feet, -and Mrs. Ritter giggles and pulls him to the left, away from the door._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Standing in the open door, addressing Teddy_] Mrs. -A.? [_Teddy nods, and Hossefrosse pretends to pick up an imaginary -telephone from a desk just to the left of the right door._] Yes? All -right. [_He pretends to hang up and set the telephone down on the desk -again._] You can clear out of here now, David, any time you like,--Mrs. -Arlington is on her way up. - -TEDDY. [_Rising, and settling the various papers on the desk_] All -right. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Helping Mr. Spindler to brush off his clothes_] Did -you hurt yourself, Mr. Spindler? [_Mrs. Pampinelli tries to attract -Spindler’s attention to the door-slam._] - -SPINDLER. No. [_He hurries over to the door-slam at the left and picks -it up._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. I’ll let you off early Monday. [_Florence stands anxiously -outside the left door._] - -TEDDY. Oh, that’s all right. - -HOSSEFROSSE. And don’t forget to leave that list with the Robinson -people on your way down Monday. - -TEDDY. No, sir, I won’t; I have it right here in me pocket. [_Florence -puts her lips against the left door and coughs hard. Then she shuffles -her feet; so does Spindler. Hossefrosse steps through the right door -and looks over toward the left door._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Addressing Teddy, in a subdued tone_] Is that someone -coming? - -TEDDY. [_Looking toward the left door_] I think so. [_There is a slight -pause, then Mrs. Pampinelli makes a decisive movement to Spindler and -he brings the door-slam down with a thunderous bang. Mrs. Pampinelli -starts violently._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. That’s too loud, Mr. Spindler! - -SPINDLER. There’s too much wood in it! [_He starts across to the -right._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Stepping down to Teddy’s desk and picking up his hat_] -That can’t be Mrs. Arlington already. I won’t see anyone else. [_He -starts back towards the door._] Tell them I’ve gone; and don’t let -anybody wait. [_He takes hold of the door as he steps through._] Say -you’re just locking up the office. [_He comes through the door and -tries to close it, but Nelly’s foot is still around it, and she is lost -in the manuscript. He pulls at the door, but she is oblivious._] - -MRS. RITTER. Nelly! [_Spindler gives a little whistle to attract her -attention._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Let go of the door, Nelly! - -MRS. FELL. [_Jumping out of the way, to the right_] Oh, I beg your -pardon! [_Hossefrosse scowls at her and closes the door. Spindler jumps -to the door and turns a key, which he has in his hand, in the lock, -then touches the button at the end of the cord, extinguishing the row -of lights over the door, then rushes back towards the left door. Mrs. -Ritter is right in his way as he rushes back, and they dodge each other -twice before Mr. Spindler can get past. When he reaches the left door, -he raps violently, Mrs. Pampinelli directing his activities with little -nervous gestures. There is a pause: then the left door is opened by -Teddy. Mrs. Ritter is right in front of it._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Standing to the left of the door_] Get out of the -way, Paula! [_Mrs. Ritter jumps out of the way, to the right, then -looks back at Mrs. Pampinelli and giggles, but Mrs. Pampinelli puts her -finger on her lips._] - -FLORENCE. [_Passing through the left door_] Good evening, son. - -TEDDY. [_Reaching out and closing the door_] Good evening. [_There -is prolonged applause from beyond the flats, and everybody, having -seen Florence safely through the door, rushes to his favorite crevice -between the wings, or rip in the scenery, to see how she is being -received by the audience._] - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] Isn’t the Doctor in? - -TEDDY. No, mam, he ain’t; he went about six o’clock. - -FLORENCE. That’s unfortunate, I wanted to see him. [_Hossefrosse turns -away from the right door, where he’s been peeking, and mops his brow: -then he turns and puts his hat down on the chair._] - -SPINDLER. [_Stepping towards him from the left door_] How do you feel? - -HOSSEFROSSE. All right; but that door and that telephone got me kind of -rattled. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Looking over from the extreme left of the back flat, -where she has been peeking_] Shush, boys! [_Hossefrosse turns away and -tiptoes towards the right, and the others resume their peeking._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Turning to Hossefrosse, as he passes below her_] What’s -the matter, Huxley, did something go wrong? [_Mrs. Pampinelli looks -over again to see who’s talking._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Indicating the right door_] That door kind of got me -rattled for a minute. - -MRS. FELL. I don’t think the audience noticed it. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Shush! [_Nelly consults her manuscript, listening at -the same time to the dialogue beyond the flats, and Mr. Hossefrosse -continues to the extreme right and forward, trying to make the squeak -of his new shoes as inaudible as possible. Mrs. Pampinelli puts her ear -to the flat and listens keenly._] - -TEDDY. [_Faintly, beyond the flats_] Why, he always asts me to wait -whenever he’s expectin’ his wife downtown. [_Spindler suddenly turns -from the wing where he has been peeking, and, breaking into quite -a jaunty little whistle, starts across towards the left; but Mrs. -Pampinelli turns abruptly and glares him into silence. He clasps his -hand over his mouth and apologizes with an obsequious little gesture._] - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] I see. And he was expecting her this -evening? - -TEDDY. Yes, mam. - -FLORENCE. Do you know her? [_Spindler trips and almost falls over the -stage-screw in the floor at the left. Twiller, who has been standing -down at the extreme left, makes an impatient move and goes up towards -the back._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Oh, Mr. Spindler, for Pity’s sake do keep still for -one moment! - -SPINDLER. [_Squatting down and attempting to remove the screw_] We’d -better get this thing out of here, before somebody gets hurt. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Now, don’t take that out of there, Mr. Spindler! You -might loosen the scenery. - -SPINDLER. This isn’t connected with the scenery. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. You don’t know whether it is or not! Leave it where it -is. - -SPINDLER. [_Getting up and moving over towards the right_] Somebody’s -going to get their neck broken, the first thing you know. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Very well, then, that will be their misfortune! We’ve -simply got to be careful, that’s all. Get ready, Paula. [_Mrs. Ritter -giggles and takes up her position outside the left door._] - -MRS. FELL. [_As Spindler comes towards her_] What’s the matter, Mr. -Spindler? - -SPINDLER. [_In quite a temper, and indicating the stage-screw over at -the left_] Why, that thing there is sticking right up in the middle of -the floor, and the first thing you-- - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Shush!--[_He turns and scowls at her, and she glares -at him. He passes below Mrs. Fell and over to Hossefrosse, at the -extreme right and forward, where he whispers his grievance._] - -MRS. FELL. You all right, Paula? [_Paula nods yes._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Don’t be nervous, now, Paula. [_Twiller comes forward -at the left._] - -MRS. RITTER. I’m not the least bit, dear, really. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, that’s splendid, dear. I’ll open the door for -you. [_She takes hold of the knob of the left door._] - -MRS. RITTER. All right, thank you. [_They stand listening, keenly._] - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] Do you mind if I wait a few minutes, in -case he comes? - -TEDDY. [_Beyond the flats_] Why, I was just going home. - -FLORENCE. Oh, were you? [_Twiller lifts his hat and gives it a little -wave at Mrs. Ritter, and she waves her hand back at him._] - -TEDDY. Yes, mam; and I have to lock up the office before I go. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Suddenly_] There it is now, dear. [_She opens -the door, and Mrs. Ritter steps back a bit, in order to make a more -effective entrance._] Good luck, darling. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Turning to her_] Thank you, dear. [_She steps through -the door, tripping awkwardly over the door-strip. Mrs. Pampinelli makes -a gesture of extreme annoyance. There is an outburst of applause; -then Mrs. Pampinelli closes the door, and they all step to the flats -and peek through, Mrs. Pampinelli at the left door, Mrs. Fell at the -right, Mr. Spindler between them, and Hossefrosse and Twiller about -half-way back at the right and left, respectively. There is a pause; -and then Mrs. Ritter can be heard beyond the flats._] Hello, kid! - -TEDDY. Hello, Mrs. Arlington. - -MRS. RITTER. Is my sweetie in? - -TEDDY. No, mam, he ain’t. - -MRS. RITTER. [_With an unnatural inflection_] What! - -MRS. FELL. [_Calling over in a whisper to Mrs. Pampinelli_] Betty! -[_Mrs. Pampinelli doesn’t hear her, so she tiptoes over towards her._] -Betty! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What? - -MRS. FELL. Did Paula trip? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Coming away from the flat, and moving down to Mrs. -Fell_] Yes. [_Mrs. Fell gives an annoyed shake of her head._] But I -don’t see how anyone can get onto _that_ stage _without_ tripping. - -MRS. FELL. I don’t either. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. It seems an utter impossibility to me for anyone, -especially a woman, to get through those doors without catching her -heel or her skirt or something. [_Spindler crosses to the left, back of -the ladies, and speaks to Twiller._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Returning to the right door_] It’s dreadful! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to her left and going back again to the -left door_] I don’t see the necessity of it. - -MRS. FELL. [_Opening her manuscript_] I don’t either. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Listening keenly_] I’m afraid they’re not hearing -Paula at all. - -MRS. FELL. What? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I say, I’m afraid Paula isn’t loud enough. - -MRS. FELL. Well, why don’t you speak to her, Betty, she’s sitting right -here. [_She indicates the point right inside the right door, and Mrs. -Pampinelli, picking up her skirt, hurries over. Mrs. Fell steps out of -the way, to the right._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Putting her lips to the joining of the door-wing and -the side wing_] Speak a little louder, Paula! I’m afraid they’re not -hearing you! - -MRS. FELL. Can she hear you? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. A little louder, dear! [_The right door is thrust open -by Teddy._] - -TEDDY. [_In a frantic whisper_] There’s no pen and ink on the desk! -[_Spindler rushes over from the left._] - -SPINDLER. What? [_Mrs. Pampinelli, Mrs. Fell and Mr. Hossefrosse rush -round to him from the right._] - -TEDDY. No pen and ink! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What is it, Teddy? - -TEDDY and SPINDLER, together. - - TEDDY. No pen and ink on the desk! - - SPINDLER. No pen and ink! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. My God! - -MRS. FELL. Tell her to use a lead-pencil! - -TEDDY and MRS. PAMPINELLI, together. - - TEDDY.--[_To Mrs. Fell_] There’s none on there! - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. Give him a lead-pencil, Mr. Spindler! - -SPINDLER. [_Whirling and springing towards the left_] Haven’t got one! -[_Teddy, Mrs. Pampinelli and Mrs. Fell rush after him._] - -SPINDLER and MRS. PAMPINELLI, together. - - SPINDLER. Twiller! - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. Oh, dear, dear! - -TWILLER. [_Rushing towards them from the left_] What’s the matter? - -SPINDLER and TEDDY, together. - - SPINDLER. Got a lead-pencil? - - TEDDY. Give him a lead-pencil, Ralph! - -TWILLER. [_Dropping his cane_] No! [_They fling him out of the way, to -the left, and rush on back to the stage manager._] What are you trying -to do, knock me off my feet! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Haven’t you got one, Mr. Twiller? - -SPINDLER and MRS. FELL, together. - - SPINDLER. [_To the stage manager_] Got a lead-pencil, old man? - - MRS. FELL. [_At Mrs. Pampinelli’s heels_] There’s one in my bag - somewhere! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI, SPINDLER and TEDDY, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to Mrs. Fell_] See what they’re doing out - there, Nelly! - - SPINDLER. [_To the stage manager_] Or a fountain-pen! - - TEDDY. [_To the stage manager_] They need it on the stage! - -MRS. FELL and STAGE MANAGER, together. - - MRS. FELL. [_Turning and rushing back towards the right door_] - Certainly, darling! - - STAGE MANAGER. [_Feeling in his shirt-pockets_] Well, now, wait a - minute, wait a minute! - -MRS. FELL. [_Turning with a despairing gesture, after having opened the -right door and looked in_] My dear, they’re not doing a thing, they’re -just sitting there! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to the left_] Hurry, boys! [_Turning to the -right_] Tell them to say something, Nelly! Anything at all! Something -about the weather! [_Nelly runs to the extreme right end of the flat. -Teddy and Spindler come rushing forward at the left._] Did you get it, -Teddy? - -TEDDY and SPINDLER, together. - - TEDDY. Yes! - - SPINDLER. Yes, he’s got it! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Indicating the left door_] Go on here, Teddy! [_He -grabs the knob of the door, but it won’t open._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Calling through the flats_] Say something, Paula! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. You should never leave the stage during a scene, Teddy! - -TEDDY and MRS. FELL, together. - - TEDDY. [_Wrestling with the door_] Damn these doors! - - MRS. FELL. [_Calling through the flats_] Something about the weather! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Take hold of this, Mr. Spindler! [_He grabs the knob -of the door and Teddy runs across to the right door._] - -TEDDY. I’ll go on here! - -MRS. FELL. [_As Teddy goes through the right door_] If you can’t -use one door, use the other! [_The door closes after him; and Mrs. -Pampinelli turns and looks upon Spindler, who is still trying to get -the left door open._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. You know, this is _all your fault_, Mr. Spindler. [_He -doesn’t look up._] You said you’d attend to all those properties! - -MRS. FELL. What’s the matter with the door, Betty? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_To Spindler_] Never mind it now. [_She moves towards -the center of the stage._] - -SPINDLER. We’d better get it open before somebody has to use it again. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Go away from it, I tell you! [_He walks away towards -the left, sulking._] It will probably open all right from the other -side. [_She comes forward slowly, touching her hair and relaxing -generally, then, suddenly, stands stock-still, and listens, wide-eyed. -She looks quickly at Mrs. Fell, who is carefully settling her necklace, -at the right door._] What’s wrong out there, Nelly? [_Nelly turns and -looks through the flats, then turns quickly to Mrs. Pampinelli._] - -MRS. FELL. I think he’s up! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Frozen to the spot_] Who? [_Nelly looks again, and -then back to Mrs. Pampinelli._] - -MRS. FELL. All of them! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Picking up her skirt and rushing towards the right -door_] Let me see! [_Nelly jumps out of the way, to the right, and -Twiller and Spindler rush to the left door and peek through. Mrs. -Pampinelli peeks through, and then speaks through the flats._] What’s -the matter, Teddy? Go over and get your hat and coat! [_Turning -frantically to Mrs. Fell_] He’s up in his lines! What is it? - -MRS. FELL. [_In a panic_] Up in his lines! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and MRS. FELL, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Speaking through the flats_] Go over and get your - hat and coat, Teddy! Don’t stand there like a jack! - - MRS. FELL. [_Handing the manuscript to Hossefrosse, who is at her - right_] Oh, find that for me, will you, Huxley! [_He takes the - manuscript from her and turns it over furiously, while Nelly opens - her lorgnon._] About page eleven, I think it is! [_She assists him in - finding the place._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What was the last line, Nelly? This is dreadful! - -MRS. FELL. Now, wait a moment, darling! Don’t get me nervous, or I’ll -_never_ be able to find it! [_Twiller and Spindler are in a panic of -suspense over at the left door._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. Here’s page eleven. - -MRS. FELL. Is that eleven? Well, now, here it is, right here-- Why, a-- -I’ll get you an envelope! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What’s the next? - -MRS. FELL. The next is--a--why a--I’ve got to go now-- - -MRS. FELL and MRS. PAMPINELLI, together. - - MRS. FELL. It takes me nearly an hour to get home! - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Calling through the flats_] I’ve got to go now! - -TEDDY and MRS. PAMPINELLI, together. - - TEDDY. [_Beyond the flats_] I’ve got to go now! - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Calling through the flats_] It takes me nearly an - hour to get home. - -TEDDY. It takes me an hour to get home! - -MRS. FELL. Are they all right? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Coming away from the flats_] Yes, they’re all right -now. But you’d better stand right here, I’m afraid of Paula. [_She -moves towards the left._] - -SPINDLER. [_Coming towards her_] You know, I could have _sworn_ I put a -pen and ink on that desk! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Imperiously_] Please, Mr. Spindler, don’t explain -anything! I am interested in results. [_She turns and moves back -again towards the right, and Spindler goes over to the left. Just as -he passes beyond the left door, the entire lock and knob fall to the -floor. He turns nervously, only to find Mrs. Pampinelli, who has turned -quite as nervously, looking at him dangerously._] - -SPINDLER. I didn’t _touch_ it! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Will you go away, before you ruin the entire -performance! [_He snaps around and goes over to the left and up towards -the back._] - -TEDDY. [_Opening the left door and swaying through_] Good night. [_He -is dressed in a brown sack-suit and wears tan shoes._] - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] Good night, son. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Beyond the flats_] Good night, kid. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Going towards him_] You should _never_ walk off the -stage, Teddy, in the middle of a scene! [_He closes the door behind -him, and, pressing his hand to his brow, starts towards the left._] Do -something, no matter what it is! [_He falls backward in a full-length -faint. She catches him._] Oh, dear child! Mr. Spindler! Come here, Mr. -Twiller, Teddy’s fainted! [_Twiller, who has been standing over at -the left, and forward, rushes towards her; and Mrs. Fell, followed by -Hossefrosse, comes rushing from the right._] - -MRS. FELL. [_In a panic_] What’s the matter, Betty! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Take Teddy over to the door, Mr. Twiller, he’s fainted! - -TWILLER. [_Dropping his cane, in his excitement_] I _can’t_ take him -now, I’ve got a cue coming right here in a minute! [_Spindler comes -rushing down from the left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Here, Mr. Spindler, take Teddy over to the door, where -he’ll get some air! He’s sick. Look at the color of him. [_She hands -him to Spindler, who half carries him up at the left; and she and -Twiller follow on behind them._] Hold on to him, now, Mr. Spindler. - -MRS. FELL. [_Turning back towards the right door, and addressing -Hossefrosse, who has returned to his former position down at the -right_] I always said he wasn’t strong enough for that part! [_She just -gets past the right door when it is frantically opened and Mrs. Ritter -thrusts her head out._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Breathlessly_] Mr. Twiller! [_The door closes again._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Running towards the left_] Mr. Twiller! They’re waiting -for you! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Rushing forward at the left_] What is it? - -MRS. FELL. [_In a perfect frenzy_] They’re waiting for Mr. Twiller! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Mr. Twiller! [_He snatches up his cane from the floor, -but the hook of it catches in the stage-brace, and he has considerable -yanking to do to get it loose. Mrs. Fell raps on the left door._] Go -on, Mr. Twiller, for Heaven’s sake! the stage is waiting! [_She pulls -the door open for him. He straightens his hat and then raps on the -wing beside the door._] Oh, go on! never mind rapping! that’s been -done! [_He steps through the door and she slams it after him, catching -his left arm and hand. The cane is in his left hand, and it falls at -Mrs. Pampinelli’s feet. She pulls the door open again to release his -arm; then gives the door a definite slam. A burst of applause greets -Twiller’s entrance. Mrs. Pampinelli is in a perfect wrath. She sweeps -across towards the right, and back again all the way across to the -left; then turns and starts back towards the right. As she passes the -left door she sees Twiller’s cane, and, realizing in a flash that he -will have need of it in his scene, she picks it up, opens the left -door slightly, and flings it in onto the stage. Then she continues on -towards the right, turns and crosses back again to the left, holding up -her skirt and bristling with temper._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Back at the right door, speaking to Hossefrosse, down at -the right_] How are my eyes? Instead of paying attention to his part! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Coming across to the right_] People rehearsing -their cues a thousand times, and then don’t know them when they hear -them! It’s positively disgusting! [_She turns and goes back again to -the left, turns, and starts back to the right. Hossefrosse tiptoes -towards her._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. What happened to Teddy, did he get sick out there? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No, just a little reaction. [_Hossefrosse nods -comprehendingly._] He gives too much to the scene. He doesn’t -understand emotional conservation yet. [_Hossefrosse shakes his head -knowingly and returns to the right, and Mrs. Pampinelli steps to the -left door and listens._] - -FLORENCE. [_Just audibly, beyond the flats_] She’s waiting for my -very unpunctual husband. In fact, we are both waiting for him, to be -precise. But I’ve just been telling her I’m afraid we may as well give -it up, for he’s never kept an appointment in his life. I’m sorry he -isn’t here, if you wanted to see him. - -TWILLER. [_Beyond the flats_] I don’t know whether I wanted to see him -or not; it depends. - -FLORENCE. I don’t understand you. - -TWILLER. I don’t fully understand myself! [_There is a very general -laugh from beyond the flats. Mrs. Pampinelli looks anxiously at Nelly, -and Nelly looks up at her from the manuscript._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What was _that_? - -MRS. FELL. [_Not having caught what she said_] What? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What was that the audience was laughing at? [_Mrs. -Fell peeks through at the door where she is standing, then turns -desperately to Mrs. Pampinelli._] - -MRS. FELL. Half of Mr. Twiller’s mustache fell off! [_She looks through -the peek again. Mrs. Pampinelli puts her hand against her brow and -leans upon the stage-brace, the picture of tragedy. Mrs. Fell turns to -her again._] I don’t think the audience noticed it, he stuck it right -on again! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. That doesn’t matter, there is absolutely no excuse for -it! He’s been here since four o’clock this afternoon! [_She crosses -towards the left and back again._] - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] What sort of a rumor was it, Mr. Rush, -if I may ask? - -TWILLER. [_Beyond the flats_] The usual kind. [_There’s another laugh -from beyond the flats, and Mrs. Pampinelli stands petrified, just below -the left door. Mrs. Fell turns quickly and peeks, then turns to Mrs. -Pampinelli._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Despairingly_] It fell off again! [_Mrs. Pampinelli raises -her fists and shakes them._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, why on earth hasn’t he brains enough to leave it -off! - -MRS. FELL. He has his hat on, too! [_Mrs. Pampinelli steps to the left -door and speaks through it._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Leave your mustache _off_, Mr. Twiller! Leave it -_off_!--And take off your _hat_, you’re inside. [_Hossefrosse tiptoes -over from the right._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. What’s the matter, did his mustache fall off? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes, twice; and he keeps sticking it on again. [_He -shakes his head regretfully and tiptoes back to the right._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Beyond the flats_] It’s perfectly ridiculous! - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] Too bad my husband isn’t here. - -TWILLER. [_Beyond the flats_] Yes, it is; I had counted upon seeing him. - -FLORENCE. I’m sure he’d be able to explain. - -TWILLER. Well, I hope he would!--the thing is damned annoying! [_Mrs. -Ritter gives an unearthly laugh, which is supposed to express derision. -Mrs. Fell looks up from her manuscript, and Mrs. Pampinelli smiles and -nods approvingly at her._] Even if _you don’t_ appreciate it! - -MRS. FELL. Wonderful. [_She turns and smiles and nods at Hossefrosse; -then they all listen again. The stage manager, who has arisen from his -chair at the sound of Mrs. Ritter’s disdainful laughter, comes forward -at the left, with his pipe in one hand and his newspaper in the other. -He has a puzzled, inquiring expression, and looks from one to the other -quizzically; but Mrs. Pampinelli has her back to him, Mrs. Fell is -looking at her manuscript, and Mr. Hossefrosse’s face is, as usual, -utterly expressionless, so he steps to the juncture of the back flats -with the side wings and peeks through, curiously. Then he returns to -his chair up at the left, shaking his head from side to side._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Beyond the flats_] I don’t know what it is, yet! - -TWILLER. [_Beyond the flats_] You know very well what it is! - -MRS. RITTER. You haven’t told us. - -TWILLER. You’re here, aren’t you! - -MRS. RITTER. Yes. - -TWILLER. Well, that’s it, exactly! [_Mrs. Pampinelli smiles -approvingly, and moves towards the right._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Calling Hossefrosse, who is engaged in studying his -lines from a paper, over at the right_] Mr. Hossefrosse. - -MRS. FELL. [_Turning to him_] Huxley! [_He looks up, and tiptoes -towards Mrs. Pampinelli._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. How is this hall to speak in? - -HOSSEFROSSE. Why, I shouldn’t say it was good. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I thought not. - -HOSSEFROSSE. It’s too big for the speaking voice. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With a gesture_] You have to _project_ the tone, do -you not? - -HOSSEFROSSE. Oh, yes, absolutely. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Taking a step towards the back flat, and listening_] -I’m afraid they’re not hearing Paula at all. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Putting his fingers to his throat_] I’m using my upper -register almost entirely. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Glancing at him_] You’re very fortunate to know how -to do it. - -HOSSEFROSSE. Did it sound all right from back here? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Oh, splendid, yes, Mr. Hossefrosse!--your voice is -beautiful. [_He raises his hand deprecatingly._] Really,--I was just -saying to Mrs. Fell, I’m so sorry there isn’t another act, that you -might sing a solo between them. [_He beams and deprecates again, -profusely, and turns to the right. Spindler comes down at the left and -towards Mrs. Pampinelli._] Really! Splendid. [_She sees Spindler._] -Where’s Teddy? - -SPINDLER. He’s gone over to the drug store. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. With his make-up on? - -SPINDLER. He said he wanted to get some aromatic spirits of ammonia. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. You have a cue right here soon, haven’t you? - -SPINDLER. [_Taking the telephone-arrangement from his pocket, and -crossing towards the right door_] Where are they? - -MRS. FELL. [_Suddenly looking up from her manuscript_] Telephone, Mr. -Spindler! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. There it is now, ring it! - -SPINDLER. [_Shaking it desperately_] It won’t ring! [_Mrs. Fell turns -to Hossefrosse in desperation._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI, MRS. FELL and HOSSEFROSSE, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. Shake it harder, it rang before! - - MRS. FELL. What’s the matter with the fool thing! - - HOSSEFROSSE. Hit it against something, Mr. Spindler! - -SPINDLER. There’s something the matter with the battery! - -FLORENCE. [_Audibly, from beyond the flats_] Hello! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Relaxing_] Let it go,--it’s too late now. [_Spindler -continues to tinker with it._] You’ve missed every other cue, [_She -moves towards the left._] you may as well be consistent for the rest of -the evening. - -SPINDLER. [_Following her_] Well, good night! I can’t help it if the -electricity won’t work, can I? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning upon him furiously_] You should have -attended to it beforehand and then it _would_ work! [_Mrs. Fell waves -her hand at them, to be quiet._] - -SPINDLER. Well, My God! I can’t be in a half-a-dozen places at the same -time! - -MRS. FELL. Shush! [_Hossefrosse tiptoes up to her and deplores the -noise that Mrs. Pampinelli and Spindler are making._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No one is asking you to be in half-a-dozen places at -the same time! You’ve simply been asked to attend to your cues; and -you’ve missed every one you’ve had! - -MRS. FELL and HOSSEFROSSE, together. Shush! - -SPINDLER. You told me to take care of Teddy, didn’t you? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I told you to take him to the door! I _didn’t_ say to -take him all the way to the drug store! - -SPINDLER. Did you want me to let the man wander off somewhere by -himself, and maybe die! - -MRS. FELL. [_Waving her manuscript at them_] Shus--sh! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and SPINDLER, together. - - SPINDLER. Just for the sake of not missing a cue! - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With bitter amusement_] There is very little danger - of his dying! And even if he did die, your duty is here! [_She points - to the floor with an imperative gesture. The right door is quietly - pushed open, and Twiller, with one-half of his mustache gone, pokes - his head out._] - -TWILLER. Shush! [_He glances from one side to the other, withdraws -his head, and quietly closes the door. Spindler crosses below Mrs. -Pampinelli, to the left, then turns and looks at her angrily._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Turning to Hossefrosse_] What did I tell you! Making more -noise out here than they are out there! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Still holding her gesture, but following Spindler -with her eyes_] Performances are never interrupted simply because one -of the artists happens to die! If you were a professional you’d know -that; but you’re not! [_She turns away from him, towards the right, -and, simultaneously, the left door is opened, almost striking her. -She raises her arm to protect herself. Mrs. Ritter is standing in the -doorway._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Speaking to Twiller, who is still beyond the flats_] -Look and see. [_The telephone-arrangement in Spindler’s hands suddenly -rings wildly._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to him frantically_] Oh, stop that thing! -[_Mrs. Ritter glances furtively over her left shoulder at Mrs. -Pampinelli. Mrs. Fell comes rushing over, motioning to Spindler to stop -the bell._] - -SPINDLER. [_Struggling with the bell_] I can’t stop it! [_Mrs. Ritter -hastily steps back through the door and pulls it to after her._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, then, take it outside, where they can’t hear it! -[_Spindler scrambles towards the back and out of sight at the left. -Mrs. Pampinelli starts back towards the right._] - -MRS. FELL. What’s the matter with that Spindler man, anyway! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I don’t know what’s the matter with him! I’ve given up -thinking about him. - -MRS. FELL. He acts to me like a person that wouldn’t be in his right -mind! [_She goes back towards the right door._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Standing in the middle of the stage_] He’s simply -not a professional, that’s all. [_The left door opens again and Mrs. -Ritter is standing in it. Mrs. Pampinelli turns suddenly and looks at -her. Mrs. Ritter repeats her unearthly laugh, which again arouses the -curiosity of the stage manager, to the extent that he rises and comes -forward again at the left to get a look at her. Then he returns to -his chair, taking the door-slam with him, and standing it against the -wing._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Addressing Twiller, beyond the flats_] What about the -gentlemen? - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] Jealous husbands, chiefly, aren’t they? -[_Twiller comes out through the left door, past Mrs. Ritter._] Didn’t -you want to leave a message for the Doctor, Mr. Rush? [_Twiller turns -right round and goes back to the door._] - -TWILLER. Who, me? - -FLORENCE. If you wish. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Having some difficulty seeing Florence over Twiller’s -right shoulder_] He might leave an apology. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Very much annoyed, and stepping close to the flat, -just to the right of the door_] Get out of the doorway, Mr. Twiller! - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] Perhaps we haven’t convinced him of his -mistake. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and MRS. RITTER, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Trying desperately to attract Twiller’s attention, - and becoming more emphatic_] Get out of the doorway, Mr. Twiller, - you’re covering Paula up! - - MRS. RITTER. [_Trying to talk to Florence over Twiller’s shoulder_] - Well, he’ll apologize to me, whether we’ve convinced him or not. - [_Mrs. Fell and Hossefrosse come over to see if they can be of any - assistance._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and TWILLER, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Becoming desperate_] Paula! [_Paula gives her a - nervous glance._] Will one of you go farther in! Mr. Twiller! - - TWILLER. [_Addressing Florence_] Have you convinced yourselves? [_He - gives Mrs. Pampinelli an irritated look over his left shoulder._] - -FLORENCE. That there has been a mistake? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Go farther in, one of you! [_Twiller gives her another -look, then speaks to Florence._] - -TWILLER. Yes! [_Mrs. Pampinelli can contain herself no longer, so, -picking up her skirt, and holding her hand against the left side of -her head, she darts across the open door, to the left, and speaks to -them around the edge of the door. Mrs. Fell, taking advantage of the -circumstance of Mrs. Pampinelli’s crossing, tiptoes up to Twiller -and strikes him on the left arm, quite viciously, with the rolled -manuscript. As a polite remonstrance, he shakes his left hand and foot -at her. But, she is not dismayed, and repeats the attack, even more -viciously. Then he turns and glares at her, and she turns away towards -the right, desperately._] - -FLORENCE. A great mistake. - -MRS. RITTER. Disappointed? Because, you know, we can _invent_ a -scandal, if you insist. - -MRS. FELL. Oh, what a man! What a man! - -FLORENCE and MRS. PAMPINELLI, together. - - FLORENCE. I’m afraid _my_ presence here would be a bit incongruous, - even for that. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. Go farther in, Mr. Twiller, don’t both of you stand - wedged in the doorway that way, it looks dreadful! - -TWILLER. [_Raising his right arm and resting his hand against the jamb -of the door, completely cutting off Mrs. Ritter’s view of Florence_] -That’s the rub. [_Mrs. Ritter stands on her tiptoes to try and see over -his arm, but being unsuccessful in this effort, stoops a bit, and tries -to look under his arm._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Take your arm down, Mr. Twiller! [_Mrs. Ritter reaches -up and quietly but firmly draws Twiller’s arm down. Mrs. Pampinelli -turns away to the left, disgusted._] My God! I never gave any such -direction as that! - -FLORENCE. Be at ease, Mr. Rush; if you were not mistaken I should have -known it,--and so should you; I’m not a tragic woman. Did you want to -leave any message for the Doctor, Mrs. Rush? - -MRS. RITTER. [_At Twiller’s right_] Yes,--[_Twiller turns his head -sharply and looks right into her eyes. She steps around back of him -and speaks to Florence over his left shoulder._] I wish you’d say that -my husband called--[_Twiller turns and looks into her eyes again, and -she steps around back of him again, to his right._] for my bill. [_She -reaches out and starts to draw the door to. Twiller, very ill at ease, -and awkwardly looking from side to side, not knowing just how to get -out gracefully, makes a full turn round to his right._] - -TWILLER. [_Raising his hat to Florence_] Good evening, Mrs. Arlington. -[_Mrs. Ritter closes the door, causing him to drop his cane; but he’s -too excited to notice it._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Standing at the right door, extending his hand_] Great, -old man! - -TWILLER. [_Dropping his gloves, as he shakes hands_] Thanks. [_He -continues to the right._] - -MRS. FELL. [_As he passes below her_] Splendid, Ralph! What happened to -your mustache? [_She laughs._] - -TWILLER. Can you beat that, Nelly! I couldn’t _coax_ that thing off -before I went on! - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Holding the knob of the right door_] Shush! - -MRS. FELL. I don’t think the audience noticed it. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Turning to them_] Shush! [_Twiller goes down to the -right, and Mrs. Fell returns to her manuscript. The left door is flung -open. They all watch eagerly._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Inside the left door_] If you will, please? - -FLORENCE. Certainly. - -MRS. RITTER. Thanks. - -FLORENCE. Don’t mention it. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Trying to appear very bold_] Good bye. - -FLORENCE. Good bye. [_Mrs. Ritter gives another famous laugh, sways -through the door, tripping over the door-strip, closes the door, -looks at Mrs. Pampinelli, who is standing at the left, and bursts out -laughing. There is prolonged applause from beyond the flats._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Splendid, Paula! - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Listening intently for his cue, from beyond the flats_] -Shush-shush! [_Mrs. Ritter looks at him, still laughing foolishly._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Waving at Paula_] Lovely, dear! - -MRS. RITTER. [_Turning to Mrs. Pampinelli_] I forgot my umbrella. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Where is it? - -MRS. RITTER. I left it on the stage. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. That doesn’t matter. [_Hossefrosse tries to silence -them by dint of impatient gesturing with his right hand._] - -MRS. RITTER. Oh, Betty, I think I saw Clara Sheppard out there! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Not really? - -HOSSEFROSSE. Shush! - -FLORENCE. [_From beyond the flats_] You can come out now, Clyde, -they’ve gone. [_Hossefrosse yanks the right door open, causing the -wood-wing at the right to topple and fall forward._] - -TWILLER. [_Leaping to catch it, before it hits Mrs. Fell_] Hold it! -[_Mrs. Fell hunches her arms and shoulders and screams._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Rushing over from the left_] What is it? - -TWILLER. [_Struggling to set the wing up in place again_] This thing -nearly fell! Just got it in time! [_Mrs. Fell moves out of the way, -over to the left, and Mrs. Pampinelli tries to assist Twiller._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Is it all right now? - -TWILLER. [_Brushing his hands and clothes, and coming forward at the -right_] Yes, it’s all right now. Just got it in time. - -MRS. FELL. [_Rushing up to Mrs. Ritter, who is coming towards her -from the left, and shaking her by the arms_] Oh, you were marvelous, -darling! [_Mrs. Ritter giggles foolishly._] I could just hug you! - -MRS. RITTER. I forgot my umbrella. - -MRS. FELL. Wonderful performance! [_She steps to the right door and -opens her manuscript. Mrs. Ritter moves a little to the right and -stands looking at the wood-wing._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning from a more precise adjustment of the -wood-wing_] Oh, Mr. Twiller! - -TWILLER. Yes? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. How did you and Paula get wedged in that door that -way, over there a moment ago? - -TWILLER. [_On Mrs. Pampinelli’s right_] Oh, I’m awfully sorry about -that! I got a little twisted on-- [_Mrs. Ritter comes to Mrs. -Pampinelli’s left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to Mrs. Ritter_] I was just asking Mr. -Twiller about that business in the door. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI, MRS. RITTER and TWILLER, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. Of course, it really didn’t matter very much. - - MRS. RITTER. Oh, my dear, wasn’t that just too dreadful! But I didn’t - know what to do! I knew there was something wrong, but I didn’t know - what it was! - - TWILLER. It was _my_ fault. I got a little twisted there in my - business-cues. I got up to the door a couple of speeches too soon. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I don’t think the audience noticed it. - -MRS. FELL. [_Frantically searching in the manuscript_] Shush! - -MRS. RITTER. Don’t you think they did, Betty? - -MRS. FELL. Shush! [_They all turn and look at her. Mrs. Pampinelli -steps towards her._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Is somebody up? [_Nelly simply silences her with a -gesture, and opens the door slightly._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Prompting through the door_] You’ve all been listening to -a lot of damned, cheap gossip! - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_From beyond the flats_] You’ve all been listening to a -lot of damned, cheap gossip! - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] Which should show you that people are -talking. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Somebody up? [_Nelly just shakes her head and -relaxes._] Mr. Hossefrosse? - -MRS. FELL. The “damned, cheap gossip” line. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Listening keenly_] Is he all right again? - -MRS. FELL. Yes, he’s all right now;--but it’s funny how that line has -sent him up at every performance. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to rejoin Mrs. Ritter and Twiller_] It’s -purely mental. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_From beyond the flats, violently_] No! [_The stage -manager, over at the left, jumps to his feet, causing the hammer to -fall from his pocket. The door-slam also falls, with a bang. The stage -manager has been dozing, and the thunder of Mr. Hossefrosse’s outburst -has considerably startled him. He comes forward at the left and looks -over at Mrs. Fell, to inquire the cause of the disturbance._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Motioning to him with her manuscript_] Shush! [_He looks -about and then goes back and picks up the hammer and door-slam. As he -resumes his seat he takes another glance around._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_As Mrs. Pampinelli comes forward again at the right, -between her and Twiller_] You know, I felt like a perfect fool standing -there in that door, but I couldn’t catch what you were saying. -[_Twiller laughs._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, dear, I _really_ don’t think the audience -noticed it. - -TWILLER. I hope they didn’t. - -MRS. RITTER. It must have looked awful. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No, dear, it didn’t, really; you both covered it up -very nicely. - -TWILLER. I _tried_ to cover it up when my mustache fell off, too;--but -I had so many _lines_ right in there. I held it on as long as I could, -but I was afraid the audience was beginning to notice it. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I was so glad you had the presence of mind not to -attempt to stick it on again when it fell off the _second_ time. - -TWILLER. I was afraid to take the time. I had a cue right there; so -when it fell off the second time, I just--let it lie there. [_He makes -a casual gesture with his right hand._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. That was quite right. - -TWILLER. [_Laughing a little_] It’s out there yet. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Giggling_] So is my umbrella. [_They all laugh._] Oh, -listen, Betty dear! I think I’ll just run upstairs for a minute and use -that telephone--see how Fred is. [_She starts towards the left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Following her_] Yes, do, Paula. - -MRS. RITTER. I’m kind of worried about him. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. See if he’s regained consciousness yet. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Regardless of the fact that a play is in progress_] -Excuse me! - -MRS. FELL. [_Looking up from her manuscript_] Shush! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Certainly, dear. [_Twiller raises his hat towards -her, and she waves back at him. Then he goes up at the right and peeks -through the side wings._] Oh, Paula! - -MRS. RITTER. [_Turning_] Yes, dear? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Be sure and get down in time for the curtains. - -MRS. RITTER. Oh, yes. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I imagine there’ll be a lot of flowers come over. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Starting up at the left_] I’ll be right down as soon as -I telephone. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes, do, dear. [_Mrs. Ritter goes out at the left, and -Mrs. Pampinelli turns, touching her hair, and starts back towards the -right. Something falls beyond the flats. She stops dead, and listens. -Mrs. Fell turns quickly and peeks through the right door. Twiller comes -forward at the right and looks inquiringly._] - -FLORENCE. [_Just audible beyond the flats_] Then, you’ve allowed him to -think so. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What’s that? - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] Perhaps it is. - -MRS. FELL. [_Turning to Mrs. Pampinelli, and quite casually_] He -knocked the ash-tray over. [_Mrs. Pampinelli relaxes, and proceeds to -arrange the beaded ornaments on her dress, while Mrs. Fell moves a bit -farther over to the right and stands listening, manuscript and lorgnon -in hand. Twiller crosses to the left, below Mrs. Fell, and gathers up -his gloves and cane._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Beyond the flats_] You are deliberately misinterpreting -this situation! Yes you are! It’s perfectly ridiculous that a physician -cannot take a woman patient without being subjected to the whisperings -of a lot of vulgar scandal-mongers. - -FLORENCE. This is not a romantic age, Clyde. - -TWILLER. [_Coming to Mrs. Pampinelli’s right_] Was that inflection of -mine any better tonight on that line, “I’m puzzled.”? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Oh, very much better, I was listening for it. - -TWILLER. [_Thoughtfully_] I never seemed to get the sense of that line -until tonight. It just seemed to--come to me, out there on the stage. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Oh, that is a very significant line, Mr. Twiller, -coming where it does. [_Spindler comes wandering on from the left, -comes forward, looks about, and goes up to the side wing and looks -through._] - -TWILLER. I felt a great deal easier in that new business of -turning--down at the bookcase that you gave me last night. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With a touch of smugness_] Much better. - -TWILLER. Did you notice it? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, of course, I couldn’t see it, I was here; but I -could sense it; and I could tell from the _tone_ of the scene that it -was better. [_Spindler moves over to the extreme left, about half-way -back, and, taking the refractory telephone-bell-arrangement from his -pocket, starts to tinker with it._] - -TWILLER. I just turned my head _this_ way, [_He turns his head sharply -to the right, keeping his body and shoulders perfectly rigid._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Excellent. - -TWILLER. [_Turning back to her_] Without moving my body. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Very good. - -TWILLER. Instead of making the full swing around, [_He makes a complete -swing around on his right foot._] the way I had been doing. [_Mrs. Fell -raises her lorgnon and looks over, curiously._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. A very good change. - -TWILLER. [_Very seriously_] I _felt_ that it got them. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, you see, it gave them the full benefit of your -expression. [_They nod agreement._] - -TWILLER. There’s a great deal of light and shade in that part, right in -there. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Deprecatingly_] Ho! my dear,--it is _all_ light -and shade;--even to the gestures. [_She makes a Delsartian movement -with her arms and hands. Mrs. Fell comes forward a little further and -observes the gesture keenly, through her lorgnon._] .... - -TWILLER. [_Rather troubled, and shaking his head a bit_] I’ve got to -put in a lot of work on _my_ gestures,--they’re bad, I know. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, I shouldn’t exactly say that your gestures were -bad; but I think, perhaps---- - -TWILLER. [_Leaning heavily on his cane_] I--ah--I think I try too hard -to be natural. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Smiling, biting her lip, and rolling her eyes_] -That’s exactly what I was going to say. Your gestures are, in a way, -_too_ natural. [_She gives a little mirthless laugh, and, out of -courtesy, he joins her._] Of course, that is a very virtuous fault; but -it isn’t pretty, is it? [_She laughs again._] - -TWILLER. No, it isn’t. [_The stage manager gets up, stretches himself, -and comes forward at the left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. And, after all, the function of art is to be pretty, -is it not? [_She repeats the floating gesture._] - -TWILLER. [_Trying to imitate her_] I don’t seem to be able--to _do_ -that, the way you do. [_Mrs. Fell feels the call, and, putting the -manuscript under her arm, tries rather unsuccessfully to copy the -movement._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Oh, it is purely a matter of experience, Mr. Twiller. -But when you’ve been in the work as long as I have,--you’ll realize -that the bird’s-wing gesture is the _only_ gesture. [_She illustrates -again, for the edification of her disciples; and they attempt rather -faithfully to imitate her. The stage manager stands looking at them._] - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] But it has its compensations--You’ll -have your memories, [_There is a confusion of voices from beyond the -flats, and cries of “Sit down!”_] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Startled_] What’s that? [_Mrs. Fell rushes to the -right door and peeks through, Twiller goes over to the right and up, -and the stage manager rushes back to his post and disappears at the -left._] What is it, Nelly? - -MRS. FELL. [_Turning suddenly to Mrs. Pampinelli_] They’re carrying a -man out of the audience! [_She looks back again through the peek, and -Mrs. Pampinelli steps to the left door and peeks. Mrs. Sheppard sweeps -on up at the left, and comes forward. She is a slim brunette, in her -thirties, very attractive, and wearing the very last whisper in widow’s -weeds. She looks around, rather dramatically, then sees the ladies. -Mrs. Fell looks away from the peek-hole and sees her._] Betty, there’s -Clara! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Looking at Nelly_] What? - -MRS. FELL. [_Not wishing to be heard_] Clara Sheppard. [_Mrs. -Pampinelli turns quickly._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Oh, Clara! [_She goes towards her, and Clara advances -a little._] I’m so glad to see you! [_Clara breaks down and weeps._] -Now, don’t do that, dear. You know Jimmy wouldn’t for anything in the -world want you to feel that way. So be brave, honey. It was splendid of -you to come here at all. And you look wonderful. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. I must look perfectly dreadful. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. You don’t look anything of the kind, darling, you look -perfectly beautiful. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. All I’ve done is cry. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I know just how you feel. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. But I didn’t want you to think I’d entirely forsaken the -cause. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Oh, my dear, we understood perfectly. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. But I just felt I _had_ to come here tonight. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Have you been out in front, Clara? - -MRS. SHEPPARD. Yes, I just _had_ to see it. I don’t think anybody saw -me; I came in late, and stood way at the back. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. They’d hardly see you. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. I don’t think so; I kept my veil lowered. Of course, I -should _love_ to have been right down in front, where I could get all -those _wonderful_ little subtleties. But, you know how it is,--I was -afraid people might not understand my being here at all. It’s only -three weeks, you know. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. They wouldn’t, either. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. That’s what I thought. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I don’t suppose there’s one person in _ten thousand_ -that has dramatic instinct enough to appreciate the way you feel. [_She -turns to the left door and listens._] - -MRS. SHEPPARD. [_Beginning to cry again_] The flowers in the lobby are -perfectly beautiful. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Still listening_] Yes, but I’m not having them -passed over the footlights tonight. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. [_Drying her eyes_] No? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Except one bouquet for each of the ladies. It took up -too much time the last time. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. [_Glancing about_] Where’s Paula? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. She’s upstairs, telephoning. She’s rather annoyed -about Fred, you know. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. What about him? [_Mrs. Pampinelli turns from the door -suddenly and looks at her._] - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] There is, my dear boy,--for lots of -people---- - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Why, my dear, didn’t you hear?--about him falling -downstairs last night? - -MRS. SHEPPARD. Oh, not really! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Coming towards her_] He fell almost the entire -flight. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. Oh, dear me! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Poor Paula’s terribly upset. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. What was he doing, coming down the stairs? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No, he was watching our rehearsal. You know, we held -the final rehearsal at Paula’s house last night--we couldn’t get this -place. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. [_Solicitously_] Well, did he break any _bones_, Betty? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No,--Doctor Wentworth said--he was unconscious before -he hit the floor. He said the fall was the result of a collapse; and -that he would have fallen no matter where he had been. Unfortunately, -he just happened to be on the stairs. [_She turns back again to the -left door._] - -MRS. SHEPPARD. [_Retrospectively_] I _thought_ he looked pale when I -saw him out there tonight. [_Mrs. Pampinelli turns suddenly and looks -at her._] - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] And you have a very modern wife. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. When you saw him out here, you mean? [_She indicates -the audience beyond the flats._] - -MRS. SHEPPARD. Yes; he was standing out there at the back, right near -_me_. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Coming towards her again_] You _must_ be mistaken, -Clara. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. No, Betty, I’m quite _sure_ I saw him. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, the only thing _I_ know is that Paula said he -hadn’t regained consciousness when she left the house this evening at -seven-thirty. [_Mrs. Ritter comes on up at the back, from the left, and -comes forward._] Here’s Paula now! - -MRS. SHEPPARD. [_Turning round to her left_] Poor dear, she must be -terribly upset. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Extending her arms_] Clara, dear! [_Mrs. Sheppard bursts -into tears again._] This is so nice of you! [_They embrace each other, -and Mrs. Ritter starts to cry._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Isn’t she the sweet thing! [_The door at the right -opens._] - -MRS. FELL. [_To the ladies_] Shush! [_They all turn and look toward the -right door._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With a gesture to Mrs. Ritter and Mrs. Sheppard_] -Shush! [_Hossefrosse comes out the right door._] - -FLORENCE. [_Beyond the flats_] It’s gotten very chilly. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Picking up his hat, cane and gloves from the chair_] -Yes, I know it has; I just came in a few minutes ago. - -FLORENCE. You had tickets for the theatre, didn’t you? - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Stepping back through the right door again_] Yes. - -FLORENCE. Why not take me?--for a change. [_The door closes._] You used -to--years ago. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to Mrs. Ritter and Mrs. Sheppard_] Paula, -Clara says she thinks she saw Mr. Ritter out there tonight. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Standing at the left_] My dear, Jenny just told me over -the telephone that he regained consciousness a half-hour after I left -the house, and went out. Said she thought from the way he talked he was -coming here. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. [_In the center_] Yes, I was _sure_ I saw him standing -out there-- [_Turning to Mrs. Ritter_] I was just telling Betty. - -MRS. RITTER. I wonder if he’s out there yet. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. I don’t know, dear. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. How much of the play did you see, Clara? - -MRS. SHEPPARD. Why, I stayed just as long as I could, Betty. But when -Paula came on, and I heard those lines of mine again, I just couldn’t -stand it. [_She breaks down, and buries her face in her handkerchief._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Laying her hand on her arm_] I know, Clara--you’re -such an artist. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. [_Pressing her hands against her bosom_] Everything just -seemed to come back on me. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I know how it is, dear. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. [_Speaking directly to Mrs. Pampinelli_] I got thinking -how Jimmy would feel, if he could know, that _he_ was the cause of -standing in the way of my first _real_ opportunity. [_She cries -again._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Raising her eyes to Heaven_] Perhaps he does know, -dear. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. [_Turning to her again_] I mean, you know, he was always -so anxious about my getting into the work. And, somehow or other, I -always _felt_--that I could have done so much with that part. [_Mrs. -Ritter gives a vague little laugh, and Mrs. Sheppard turns to her -quickly._] Oh, of course, you were perfectly _adorable_ in it, darling, -I don’t mean that-- [_The left door opens, and Florence is standing in -it, about to come out._] - -MRS. FELL. [_To Mrs. Pampinelli, Mrs. Ritter and Mrs. Sheppard_] Shush! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning and going closer to the left door_] Excuse -me, Clara. - -MRS. SHEPPARD. Certainly, dear. [_Twiller comes forward at the right._] - -FLORENCE. [_Stepping through the door_] By the way, there was a Mr. -Robinson telephoned this morning, after you’d left the house-- [_Mrs. -Sheppard waves her handkerchief at Florence, and Florence replies -by quietly flicking her fingers at her. Then, still keeping in her -character, she moves slowly towards the right, leaving the door open -behind her._] He said something about a list being correct. - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Appearing in the doorway, carrying his hat, cane and -gloves_] Yes, I know. [_He reaches towards the left, beyond the flats, -as though he were pushing an electric-light button, then thrusts his -head through the door and says in a fierce whisper._] Lights. - -FLORENCE. Lights out! - -MRS. FELL and MRS. PAMPINELLI, together. - - MRS. FELL. Put out the lights, somebody! - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. Lights, Mr. Stage Manager! [_The stage manager - appears from the left, at the back._] - -SPINDLER. [_Springing from the left, where he has been engaged in -trying to repair the telephone-battery_] Lights out! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Where are you! [_The stage manager reaches up and -pulls one of the switches on the switch-board at the back, and the -lights beyond the flats go out; then he disappears again at the left._] - -SPINDLER and HOSSEFROSSE, together. - - SPINDLER. I was right here! - - HOSSEFROSSE. [_Coming through the door_] Yes, I know,-- [_Closing the - door behind him_] I talked to him. [_Puts his hat on_] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, why aren’t you right _here_, where you should -be! Stand by for the curtain, now,--see if you can do that much right. -Surely, it’s the old story of the lark,--if you want a thing done, do -it yourself! Curtain! - -SPINDLER. [_Shouting_] Curtain! [_The curtain, beyond the flats, begins -to roll down, and there is thunderous applause._] - -MRS. FELL. [_To Florence_] Marvelous, darling! [_Florence waves at -her, turns, and rushes back towards the left._] Just lovely, Huxley! - -HOSSEFROSSE. Thanks. [_He turns to the left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Lights up! Splendid, children! - -FLORENCE. I’m awfully glad to see you, Clara! - -MRS. SHEPPARD, MRS. PAMPINELLI, HOSSEFROSSE and SPINDLER, together. - - MRS. SHEPPARD. [_Shaking hands with Florence_] You were wonderful, - Flossie! - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. Take up the curtain, Mr. Stage Manager! - - HOSSEFROSSE. Thank you very much. - - SPINDLER. Lights up! [_The stage manager appears from the left and - pulls the switch again, and the lights beyond the flats go on._] - -SPINDLER. Take it up! [_The stage manager darts off again to the left. -The waltz-music on the piano, beyond the flats, begins again._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Lifting his hat and beaming_] Hello, Clara! - -MRS. SHEPPARD. Wonderful! [_He deprecates profusely. The curtain rises -again._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Go on, Mr. Hossefrosse! [_He opens the right door, -removing his hat._] Wait a moment, Mr. Hossefrosse! Come on, Florence! -[_Hossefrosse stops uncertainly in the doorway and looks at Mrs. -Pampinelli._] It’s all right! Go on! [_She opens the left door._] Here, -go on here, Florence! [_They go on, bowing, and there is prolonged -applause._] Come on, Paula! go on here! [_The curtain descends again. -Paula scurries to the left door, giggling._] Where’s Mr. Twiller! - -TWILLER. [_Springing over from the right, where he has been talking and -laughing with Mrs. Fell_] Here I am! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to the left_] Take it up again, Mr. Stage -Manager! [_Turning back to Twiller, and opening the door_] Here, Mr. -Twiller, take Paula on! [_The curtain can be seen through the left -door rising again._] Come on, Paula! [_Twiller drops his cane, in -shifting it from his right hand to his left._] Hurry up! [_He snatches -the cane up, and, taking Paula by the arm, escorts her through the -door. But she trips over the door-strip, nevertheless. And there is -sustained applause. Mrs. Fell, over at the right, begins to preen -herself feverishly. Mrs. Pampinelli closes the door slowly, and stands -listening, smiling. Teddy appears up at the left and comes forward, -pressing his violet handkerchief to his brow, and looking very wan. -Mrs. Pampinelli turns to him._] Come on, Teddy, hurry up! They’re just -going on! How do you feel? [_The curtain descends._] - -TEDDY. Only fair. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Taking him by the right arm and urging him towards -the right_] Here, Nelly, go on for a bow with Teddy! [_Rushing back -towards the left_] Take it up again, Mr. Stage Manager! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI, TEDDY and SPINDLER, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. Mr. Spindler! - - TEDDY. [_Opening the right door_] Come on, Nelly! - - SPINDLER. [_Half-way back, at the left_] Take it up! [_Rushing forward - at the left_] Yes? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and MRS. FELL, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_To Spindler_] Keep it going up and down till I tell - you to stop! And keep it up the next time till the gentlemen get the - flowers! - - MRS. FELL. [_Shrinking away a little more to the right of the door, - but still preening herself, almost hysterically, and breaking into a - little nervous laugh_] Oh, no, really, dear! I wouldn’t _think_ of it! - [_Teddy goes through the right door. The curtain can be seen rising - again; then the door closes after him; and Mrs. Fell continues - talking, to herself._] Why, what have I done that I should go on. I - wouldn’t mind if I’d taken some part in the play,--but I certainly - don’t see-- - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Rushing back to the right_] Go on, Nelly! what are -you waiting for? [_The curtain descends again. Mrs. Fell rushes towards -Mrs. Pampinelli._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Handing Mrs. Pampinelli the rolled manuscript_] Hold this! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Hurry, dear! [_Mrs. Fell rushes to the right door, -settles herself finally, and flings the door open. The curtain is just -rising. And, placing one hand upon her bosom, dropping her eyes and -smiling, Nelly sways through the door, acknowledging the plaudits. -Mrs. Pampinelli, standing in the middle of the stage, applauds, also, -hitting the manuscript against her hand. The door closes after Mrs. -Fell. Mrs. Sheppard, over at the left, suddenly bursts into tears and -buries her face in her handkerchief. Mrs. Pampinelli turns quickly and -looks at her, then crosses towards her._] Do you want to take a bow, -Clara? - -MRS. SHEPPARD. Oh, no, thank you! [_Mrs. Pampinelli turns back to the -left door._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Get those flowers, boys! Keep it up, Mr. Stage -Manager! Come on, Clara! go on for a bow! [_Reaches for Mrs. Sheppard’s -hand_] - -MRS. SHEPPARD. [_Giving Mrs. Pampinelli her hand, and allowing herself -to be drawn towards the right_] Do you think they’d understand, Betty? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Of course, they would, my dear! They know it isn’t -your fault that you’re not appearing! [_Mrs. Fell thrusts open the -right door. She has a basket of roses in her hand._] - -MRS. FELL. They’re _calling_ for you, Betty! [_Someone in the audience -can be heard calling Mrs. Pampinelli’s name._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Here, Nelly, take Clara on for a bow! - -MRS. FELL. [_Impatiently_] They’re calling for you, dear! [_Mrs. -Sheppard hastily throws her veil back, dramatically._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I’ll take one alone, afterwards! [_The applause swells -again._] Go on, Clara! - -MRS. FELL. [_Extending her right hand_] Come on, dear! - -MRS. SHEPPARD. [_Giving Mrs. Fell her left hand_] Oh, I don’t feel that -I should! [_Mrs. Fell keeps the door open, and Clara droops through, -bowing. Then Mrs. Fell closes the door and Mrs. Pampinelli turns to the -left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Keep it up, Mr. Spindler! - -SPINDLER. Keep it up! - -HOSSEFROSSE. [_Thrusting open the left door_] Mrs. Pampinelli! [_There -is a vision through the door of the various artists bowing towards the -back wall, all the ladies laden with flowers._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. All right, dear! I’m coming! [_Hossefrosse closes the -door, and Mrs. Pampinelli deftly touches her hair and flings her train -out to its full length behind her. Then she speaks in a loud voice, -so that she may be heard by those on the other side of the flats._] -Everybody stand to one side! Stand to one side, everybody! [_She pulls -open the left door and stands, smiling: then she steps through the -door; and, instantly, the curtain falls with a deafening crash. The -door closes after her. Nelly Fell gives a piercing scream. Spindler -comes rushing down from the left to the left door._] - -TEDDY. [_Shouting, beyond the flats_] Curtain! - -HOSSEFROSSE. Take up the curtain! - -TWILLER. Take it up! [_There is a babel of voices beyond the flats. -Then the left door is thrust violently open, and Mrs. Pampinelli looks -out._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Harshly, to Spindler_] What’s the matter with the -curtain? - -SPINDLER. [_In a panic of excitement_] Something’s broke! [_The stage -manager rushes on from the left and comes forward._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Coming out through the door and calling to the stage -manager, whom she hasn’t seen yet_] Take up the curtain, Mr. Stage -Manager! - -STAGE MANAGER. I can’t take it up, the guy-rope’s broken! [_He goes up -at the left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What? [_Mrs. Fell comes running through the right -door, carrying her basket of flowers, and crosses towards the left._] - -MRS. FELL and SPINDLER, together. - - MRS. FELL. What is it, Betty? - - SPINDLER. [_To Mrs. Pampinelli_] He says the guy-rope’s broken! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Brushing him aside, to the left, and rushing up at -the left_] My God! did anyone ever hear of such stupidity! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI, MRS. FELL and SPINDLER, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. I’ll go on at the side here! - - MRS. FELL. What’s the matter, Mr. Spindler? - - SPINDLER. [_Shouting after Mrs. Pampinelli_] He says he can’t get it - up! [_Mrs. Sheppard comes through the right doorway with an armload - of American Beauty roses, and stands looking anxiously from side to - side. Teddy follows her out and stands at her right, discussing the - incident. Florence opens the left door and comes out. Her arms are - full of tiger-lilies. She moves to the right and speaks to Mrs. - Sheppard, nervously._] - -STAGE MANAGER. You can’t get through there, lady! [_Twiller comes out -the left door._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI and STAGE MANAGER, together; - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. I must get through somewhere! - - STAGE MANAGER. That tormentor’s too narrow there! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI, STAGE MANAGER and MRS. FELL, together. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning frantically and rushing forward again at - the left_] I’ll try the other side! He says it’s too narrow there! - - STAGE MANAGER. I don’t know how you’re going to do it! - - MRS. FELL. [_As Mrs. Pampinelli sweeps between her and Spindler_] What - is it he says is broken, Betty? [_Mrs. Pampinelli rushes over towards - the right. She literally sweeps Twiller, who is in her path, out of - the way, and he falls backward over a stage-brace, onto the floor. - Mrs. Fell picks up her dress and runs after Mrs. Pampinelli._] - -SPINDLER. [_Outrunning Mrs. Fell_] The guy-rope! - -MRS. FELL. Well, why doesn’t he fix it! Betty! Betty dear! [_Mrs. -Pampinelli rushes up at the extreme right and tries desperately to find -a way of getting through; but everything is solidly masked. Hossefrosse -comes out the left door, and the stage manager comes forward at the -left and stands looking after Mrs. Pampinelli._] - -HOSSEFROSSE. What’s the matter, can’t Mrs. Pampinelli get her bow? - -STAGE MANAGER. She can’t get on any more from that side than she can -from this! [_Hossefrosse steps out through the door and looks toward -the right. The door closes after him._] There’s the same opening over -there as there is here! [_The applause beyond the flats, which has -kept up throughout the debacle, begins to die. Mrs. Pampinelli comes -sweeping back from the right with fire in her eye,--Nelly Fell and -Spindler still at her heels. She plants herself in the middle of the -stage and glares at the stage manager._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_In a voice shrill with anger_] My God! what’s the -matter with your curtain! - -STAGE MANAGER. [_Losing his temper_] The guy-rope’s broken! I’ve told -you that about a dozen times! [_He turns doggedly away to the left, as -though he were going up to his chair; but he stops short and finishes -his remarks to her over his left shoulder._] What do you want me to do, -write you a letter! [_The left door is pushed quietly open; and Mrs. -Ritter, with her face just visible above a perfect screen of roses, -looks blankly at the stage manager._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Vaguely_] There’s something the matter with the curtain. -[_The real stage curtain commences to descend._] - -STAGE MANAGER. [_Leaning towards her, assuming her general manner and -tone, and flipping his hand at her_] Y-E-E-S! [_He goes up towards his -chair, and Mrs. Ritter stands in wide-eyed astonishment._] - - -END OF THE ACT. - - - - -THE TORCH-BEARERS. - -ACT III. - - -NOTE: - -The setting for Act III is the same as for Act I except that the small -chair which Jenny brings on at the opening of the play is eliminated. - - -_Jenny is seated at the table below the piano, reading the Pictorial -Review. The door closes out at the right. She stops reading and -listens. Then resumes. Ritter wanders in from the right hallway, -wearing a black overcoat and a derby. The derby is a bit over one -eye and his cigar is at a comic angle. Jenny sees him and rises -immediately, circling around to the left to the middle of the room._ - - -JENNY. Oh, Mr. Ritter! [_He comes into the center-door and stands -there, looking at nothing._] I didn’t hear you come in, sir. Is the -show over? - -RITTER. [_Removing his gloves_] It’s all over town by this time. - -JENNY. [_Standing slightly left of the center of the room, facing him_] -Mrs. Ritter just telephoned a minute ago. - -RITTER. Is she alive? - -JENNY. Alive, Mr. Ritter? - -RITTER. [_Moving down to the table below the piano, and thrusting -his gloves into his overcoat pocket_] Because if she is, she’s got -a charmed life. [_Commencing to unfasten his coat_] The Seamen’s -Institute! God help them on a night like this. - -JENNY. She was anxious to know if you were still unconscious. - -RITTER. [_Taking off his overcoat_] If she telephones again, tell her -yes. [_He is in a tuxedo-suit._] - -JENNY. [_Crossing to him and helping him with the coat_] Ain’t you -feelin’ well again, Mr. Ritter? - -RITTER. No, Jenny, I’m not. [_He hands her his derby._] - -JENNY. [_Taking the hat and coat to the partition-seat above the -piano_] Well, I’m sure I’m sorry, sir. - -RITTER. [_Removing his scarf_] And after that exhibition tonight,--I -don’t think I ever shall feel exactly well again. - -JENNY. [_Coming down at his left and passing back of him_] Was it a sad -play? - -RITTER. [_Handing her his scarf, and speaking with measured -conviction_] The saddest thing I’ve ever seen in my life. - -JENNY. I allus cry when a show is sad. - -RITTER. Is that so? - -JENNY. Yes, sir; and a funny thing about me is--the sadder it is the -more I cry. - -RITTER. You’d have had a big night if you’d been with me. [_She passes -back of him with the scarf, to put it with the other things._] You’d -better leave those things here, Jenny, I may leave town again tonight. - -JENNY. I’ll leave them right here. [_She turns from an arrangement of -the things and comes forward to the middle of the room._] Did they clap -much when Mrs. Ritter finished? - -RITTER. [_Still standing above the table near the piano, clipping the -tip of a cigar which he has taken from his pocket_] I didn’t wait for -the finish; they carried me out. - -JENNY. I’m dyin’ till she gets home, for I know exactly how she felt. -[_He looks at her keenly--she is looking straight ahead._] - -RITTER. Have you been on the stage, too, Jenny? - -JENNY. [_Turning to him_] No, sir, I haven’t, Mr. Ritter, not lately. -But when I was at home in England I used to go on every once in a -while. For a bit of a change, you know. - -RITTER. Yes, I know. - -JENNY. We had a little club in the town I lived in, and we used to give -a show twice a year. [_Ritter nods slowly and comprehendingly._] I -always took off the comical parts. - -RITTER. How is it they didn’t get you into this show tonight? - -JENNY. Oh, I haven’t been on for a long time now, Mr. Ritter. My -husband put a stop to it. [_She looks away off._] - -RITTER. [_Turning to her_] What was the matter? - -JENNY. [_Turning to him, suddenly_] He died. - -RITTER. [_Replacing his penknife_] I see. - -JENNY. And I never felt much like cuttin’ up after that. [_The -telephone-bell rings. She turns quickly and starts for the -center-door._] - -RITTER. [_Moving over towards the mantelpiece_] See who that is, Jenny. - -JENNY. [_Hurrying out into the left hallway_] Yes, sir. - -RITTER. [_Getting a match from the table below the mantelpiece_] -Anybody for me, I’ve gone into permanent retirement. - -JENNY. [_At the telephone_] Yes? [_He listens narrowly._] Mr. Ritta? -[_He makes a rapid movement towards her._] Oh, Mrs. Ritta? - -RITTER. [_In a subdued tone_] Who do they want? - -JENNY. [_Into the telephone_] No, mam, she hasn’t got home yet. -[_Lowering the telephone and speaking to Ritter_] Mrs. Ritter. - -RITTER. [_Casually_] Who is it, the police? [_He lights his cigar._] - -JENNY. [_Into the telephone_] All right, Mrs. Livingston, I’ll give -her your message as soon as she comes in. You’re more than welcome I’m -sure. [_She hangs up and comes to the center-door._] - -RITTER. [_Looking at her_] Mrs. Livingston? - -JENNY. Yes, sir. - -RITTER. What did she want? - -JENNY. She sez she wanted to congratulate Mrs. Ritter on her perfect -performance tonight. - -RITTER. Did she see the show? - -JENNY. She didn’t say, sir. - -RITTER. [_Conclusively, and crossing in front of her down to the window -at the right_] She didn’t see it. If any of those women come back here -with Mrs. Ritter, Jenny,--say that I’m not home yet, do you understand. - -JENNY. [_Settling the overcoat on the partition-seat_] Yes, sir. - -RITTER. [_Looking through the window_] And that you haven’t seen -anything _of_ me. - -JENNY. Yes, sir, Mr. Ritter, all right. - -RITTER. If my wife’s alone, let me know as soon as she comes in. - -JENNY. Yes, sir, I will. [_The telephone-bell rings, and she hurries -out to answer it._] - -RITTER. [_Half turning from the window_] You haven’t seen anything of -me, remember. - -JENNY. No, sir. [_Into the telephone_] Yes, sir? [_He listens, without -turning._] No, sir, she hasn’t got home yet. [_She lowers the telephone -and looks at him, wide-eyed. He feels that she’s looking at him and -turns suddenly._] - -RITTER. [_Taking a step towards her, below the piano_] What is it? - -JENNY. [_Into the telephone_] No, sir, _he_ hasn’t got home yet neither. - -RITTER. [_Apprehensively_] Do they want me? [_She nods yes._] Who is -it? [_She nods that she doesn’t know._] Police Headquarters I’ll bet -a ten dollar note! [_He crosses down below the table at the left and -around up to the mantelpiece._] Tell them that I had absolutely nothing -to do with her going on! That I didn’t hear about it until last night! -[_He crosses back again down towards the table below the piano._] And -that I’ve been unconscious ever since. - -JENNY. [_Into the telephone_] The Times? - -RITTER. [_Stopping above the table_] My God, the newspapers have got -hold of it! - -JENNY. [_Into the telephone_] Well, just a minute, please. - -RITTER. [_Turning suddenly to her_] Tell them she did it on a bet! - -JENNY. The Times newspaper wants to know if Mrs. Ritter has a -full-length photograph of herself for the morning paper. - -RITTER. [_Emphatically, and going out through the center-door into the -right hallway and up the stairs_] Tell them NO! - -JENNY. [_Into the telephone_] Hello. - -RITTER. But that she’ll have some taken as soon as she gets out of -jail. [_He goes through the arched doorway at the head of the stairs._] - -JENNY. [_Into the telephone_] Why, I couldn’t say, sir, whether Mrs. -Ritter has a photograph of herself or not, sir; but I’ll give her your -message as soon as she comes in. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_In the right hallway_] Hurry, Theodore. - -JENNY. [_Still at the telephone_] You’re more than welcome I’m sure. -[_She hangs up and hurries in through the center-door, glancing out the -right hallway as she comes and, gathering up Mr. Ritter’s overcoat, -derby and scarf, hurries over above the table at the left and out._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_In the right hallway_] Be careful of those jonquils. -Now, be careful, Theodore! Now go back and fetch the others. [_Coming -into view, and seeing Jenny coming in again at the left door_] Oh, -you’re up, Jenny, aren’t you! [_She comes through the center-door, -carrying her fan and an armload of orchids and red chrysanthemums, and -wearing an enormous flowing cape of ruffled black lace, touched all -over with tiny circular sequins in gold. Her dress, of course, is the -ruby-velvet one of the preceding act._] - -JENNY. Yes, mam, I’m up. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Hastening to the table below the piano_] I’m so -glad; I hope I haven’t roused you. [_She puts her fan on the piano and -sets all the flowers down on the table._] Will you go out and get those -flowers from my chauffeur, Jenny? - -JENNY. [_Going out through the center-door into the right hallway_] -Yes, mam. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Arranging the flowers on the table_] He’s set them -right down there in the hallway. I came right on in when I found the -door unlocked; I was afraid you’d be asleep. - -JENNY. No, mam, I was waitin’ up. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Sweeping around to her left and up to the -center-door_] Well, that’s perfectly angelic of you I’m sure. [_She -stands on the left side of the center-door and looks out into the right -hallway._] Can you manage, dear? - -JENNY. [_Appearing from the right_] I think so. [_She struggles through -the center-door carrying an enormous horseshoe, made of red and white -carnations and ferns. It is at least four feet high, set upon an easel, -and across the front of it is a strip of white-satin ribbon ten inches -wide with the word “SUCCESS” inscribed upon it in blue-velvet letters. -She is also carrying a huge basket of jonquils, and a star made of -white pansies. This last touch is fastened upon a violet easel._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Let me help you, child. [_She takes the basket of -jonquils and the star of pansies from Jenny._] Now, set that right down -there. [_She indicates a point in front of the mantelpiece for the -horseshoe, and Jenny crosses in front of her with it._] I want Mrs. -Ritter to see it _first_, when she comes in,--it’s so appropriate. -[_She sets the basket of jonquils on the piano._] I suppose we can put -these down anywhere here until she comes, can’t we? [_She sets the -easel of pansies down on the floor at the right of the table below the -piano._] - -JENNY. [_Having set the horseshoe down in front of the mantelpiece_] -This way, Mrs. Pampinelli? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. No, dear, _facing_ the door. - -JENNY. Oh, I see. [_She turns it round facing the center-door._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. That’s it. I want it to catch her eye as she comes in. -And now will you go back and fetch the others, Jenny? - -JENNY. [_Hurrying out through the center-door_] Yes, mam. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Gathering up the chrysanthemums from the table_] -And these chrysanthemums, [_She sweeps across towards the mantelpiece -and turns to her left, strewing the chrysanthemums through the -center-door and down toward the table at the left._] I’ll just strew -in her pathway. [_Jenny comes in from the right hallway carrying a -huge anchor of vivid red roses, with a broad band of navy-blue ribbon -running diagonally across it, and the words “SEAMEN’S INSTITUTE” in -white-velvet letters. She stands right in the center-door, holding it, -waiting for instructions as to its disposition from Mrs. Pampinelli. -But Mrs. Pampinelli is lost in admiration of it, standing just to -the left of the center-door._] Now, set that right down here, Jenny. -[_She indicates a point at the extreme left, below the door, and Jenny -hastens to place it there, setting it down half-facing the center-door; -and Mrs. Pampinelli stands up at the center-door admiring it._] Hope! -[_Jenny turns to her and gives a faint little laugh._] Hope, for -the success [_She indicates the horseshoe with a gesture._] of our -enterprise. [_They both laugh, and Mrs. Pampinelli steps quickly down -to the table below the piano and picks up the orchids._] And these -orchids, I think I shall just put right here on this table. [_She -crosses to the table below the casement-window and puts them down; then -straightens up and sighs._] Ho, dear me, I’m warm! [_She crosses back -between the piano and the table below it, picking up her fan as she -goes._] - -JENNY. [_Moving up and across back of the table at the left, towards -the center of the room_] ’Tis a bit warm. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Fanning herself, as she moves towards the middle of -the room_] And then I hurried so,--foolishly. - -JENNY. Did everything go along all right? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Magnificently, my dear child! And Mrs. Ritter was a -positive sensation. - -JENNY. Did she get all these flowers? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Deprecatingly_] Ho! This isn’t the half of them! We -sent three automobiles full to the various hospitals. And Mrs. Fell’s -car was still taking them when I left. [_Jenny shakes her head from -side to side in wonderment._] These are just a few that we rescued for -Mrs. Ritter. [_She moves towards the center-door._] Sort of a little -surprise for her, you know, when she gets home. [_She stands looking -out into the right hallway, expectantly._] - -JENNY. They’re certainly ’andsome. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. She doesn’t even know that I’ve brought them. - -JENNY. Is she comin’ right home, do you know, Mrs. Pampinelli? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to Jenny_] Why, I _expect_ her, yes. I was -afraid she’d get here ahead of me. She was waiting for Mr. Ritter. -[_Coming forward a little_] We heard at the hall that he was there, and -she thought probably he’d come back and pick her up. He hasn’t _come_ -home, has he? - -JENNY. No, mam, I haven’t seen anything of him. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Laughing a little, indulgently, securing a hair-pin, -and moving over towards the right_] Poor man! His wife’s success has -very likely gone to his head. [_She glances out the window._] - -JENNY. He went out of here about eight o’clock. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning and coming back towards Jenny_] Yes, we were -so surprised to hear that he was there at all. Because Mrs. Ritter had -said that he hadn’t regained consciousness up to the time she left the -house. - -JENNY. He hadn’t, neither. I thought I ’ad two ’eads on me when I came -in and saw him puttin’ on ’is ’at and coat. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, did he seem all right? - -JENNY. Yes, he seemed right enough; but he was awful pale-lookin’. And -a couple a times I spoke to ’im, he gave me kind of a funny answer. -So I got a bit frightened, you know; and I asked ’im if he knew where -he was goin’. And he said, “Yes,” that he was goin’ to see “The -Torch-Bearers.” Kind a flightly, you know. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, he would be, naturally. - -JENNY. So then,--when he got to the door, he turned around--and he sez -to me--“Jenny!--if you never see me again,--I want you to know I _died_ -in the cause of Art.”--And he went out. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. He was probably rambling a bit. - -JENNY. But, he walked straight enough. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning suddenly to the center-door_] I think I hear -a machine, Jenny. - -JENNY. [_Stepping across quickly below the table to the -casement-window_] I’ll see. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Do quickly, dear. - -JENNY. Is Mrs. Fell comin’ back tonight? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Looking out eagerly into the right hallway_] Yes, -she’s bringing the rest of the flowers. I’ve sent my car back for her. - -JENNY. [_Turning abruptly from the window and hurrying across below the -piano towards the center-door_] Here’s Mrs. Ritta now! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Is Mr. Ritter with her? [_Intercepting Jenny_] No, -don’t go out, Jenny! I want to hear what they say when they see the -flowers. [_Turning her round by the shoulder and indicating the door -down at the left_] You go into the other room there, and I’ll hide -here-- [_She moves forward at the right and across below the piano._] -in this window. - -JENNY. [_Hurrying towards the door at the left_] All right, mam. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Stopping near the window and turning to Jenny_] And, -Jenny dear! - -JENNY. [_Turning at the left door_] Yes, mam? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Don’t come out--until you hear _me_ say “SURPRISE!” - -JENNY. All right, Mrs. Pampinelli, I won’t. [_Mrs. Pampinelli steps -into the alcove of the window, then turns again to Jenny._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Now, remember, Jenny,--“SURPRISE!” - -JENNY. Yes, I know. [_She closes the door, and Mrs. Pampinelli conceals -herself behind the window-drapery. There is a slight pause; then Mrs. -Ritter hurries in from the right hallway, carrying a marvelous bouquet -of American Beauty roses. She comes in through the center-door and -stands, looking, with a touch of astonishment, at the horseshoe. Then -her eyes wander down to the anchor; and then over to the easel at the -right. She is gowned in a very pale shade of gray lace, with gray-silk -slippers and stockings; and around her head she is wearing a wreath -of laurel in gold, touched with brilliants. Her cloak is of black -chiffon-velvet, with a cape collar of black fox. She slides this cloak -from her shoulders onto the partition-seat at the right, and starts -across towards the door at the left._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Opening the door_] Are you up, Jenny?--Jenny! [_She -closes the door again and crosses above the table at the left and over -to the one below the piano. Here she sets down a few of the roses, then -decides there is not sufficient room for all of them, and starts across -to the table at the left. Ritter appears at the head of the stairs and -starts down slowly. She sees him, and stops dead._] Fred! [_She moves -up towards the left of the center-door._] You don’t mean to tell me -you’ve been home here,--and there I’ve been waiting at the hall since -before ten o’clock. [_He wanders in through the center-door and leans -against the piano, holding a lighted cigar in his hand._] Why didn’t -you come back for me? Irene Colter had to bring me home. [_She starts -to cry._] Clara Sheppard _told_ me she saw you there, so, naturally, I -waited for you. And when you didn’t come back, why, of course, right -away--I thought something had happened to you. [_She cries into her -handkerchief._] - -RITTER. [_Without moving, and in a toneless voice_] Something _has_ -happened to me. [_She looks at him apprehensively._] - -MRS. RITTER. What happened to you, Fred? - -RITTER. [_Stonily, and moving down and across below the piano_] I’ve -seen you act. - -MRS. RITTER. What? [_He raises his left hand solemnly and continues to -the corner of the piano nearest the window, where he leans. She moves -down a bit after him._] What’s the matter, Fred,--did you have another -of those spells that you had last night? - -RITTER. Yes; only a great deal worse. - -MRS. RITTER. Oh, isn’t that dreadful! What do you think it is, dear? - -RITTER. [_Turning slightly, and glancing at the violet easel and over -at the anchor_] I don’t know what it is. It looks like a _wake_ to me. -Who’s dead? - -MRS. RITTER. Dead? - -RITTER. What are all these flowers doing here? - -MRS. RITTER. Why, I imagine some of the ladies have been here from the -show--to fix up a little surprise for _me_. - -RITTER. They should have lighted a few candles, and completed the -effect. - -MRS. RITTER. But, these are just presents, Fred, from friends of ours. - -RITTER. [_Straightening up, and moving across below the table_] They -are tokens of sympathy, that’s what they are. [_He crosses up and over -above the table at the left._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Following him over_] But, there’s nobody _dead_, dear! - -RITTER. [_Raising his left hand solemnly again_] Oh, yes there is! Oh -yes! - -MRS. RITTER. _Really_, dear! [_He turns, just back of the arm-chair, -and pins her with a look._] - -RITTER. You’re dead. [_She stands perfectly still, looking at -him, wide-eyed._] You died tonight,--down there on that stage at -Horticultural Hall. And so did everybody that was up there with you. - -MRS. RITTER. [_With a troubled, uncomprehending expression_] Why, how -could I be dead, dear,--when I’m here,--talking to you? [_He stands -looking straight ahead, smoking. She bursts out crying, and turns to -the partition-seat at the right of the center-door._] Oh, Fred! it’s -terrible to see you this way! - -RITTER. [_Sweeping his hand across his brow and starting across below -the table towards the right_] The human brain can only stand so much. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Setting her roses down on the partition-seat_] You’ve -just been working yourself to death! But nobody could tell you -anything! [_She starts out into the left hallway for the telephone._] - -RITTER. [_Stopping over near the window and turning_] What are you -going to do? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Turning to him_] Why, I’m going to call Doctor Wentworth -of course. - -RITTER. What for? - -MRS. RITTER. Why, because you _need_ him! - -RITTER. [_Taking a step or two towards her, between the piano and the -table below it_] I won’t see any doctor, now! - -MRS. RITTER. [_Coming back through the center-door_] Now,--listen, -Fred-- - -RITTER. [_Raising his hand, and crossing to the left_] I won’t see any -doctor, I tell you--there’s nothing he can do for me: [_He stops above -the arm-chair at the left and rests his hand upon the back of it._] -it’s all been done. There’s nothing left for me but to get out of town. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Following him over_] Well, just let him come over and -_see_ you, dear. - -RITTER. What would I let him come over and _see_ me for? There’s -nothing the matter with me. - -MRS. RITTER. Why, you’re as pale as a ghost! - -RITTER. That’s nothing--I’ve had a scare. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Solicitously_] What scared you, dear? [_He turns and -looks at her._] - -RITTER. I was afraid every minute somebody was going to shoot _you_. - -MRS. RITTER. [_After a bewildered pause_] But, why should anybody shoot -_me_, darling? - -RITTER. For trying to act. [_He moves forward and across in front -of the table, to the right,--she watching him blankly._] Making a -laughing-stock of yourselves in front of the community. - -MRS. RITTER. Didn’t you like me, Fred? - -RITTER. [_Casually, as he nears the window_] I did till I saw you act. -[_He turns around to his right and leans on the piano. She moves over -towards the table below the piano._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Rather helplessly, as the situation dawns upon her_] -Why, Mrs. Pampinelli said I was a great artist. - -RITTER. [_With vast amusement_] Ha! [_Then he looks at his wife and -speaks very exactly._] Mrs. Pampinelli is perhaps the world’s greatest -_NUT_. [_Mrs. Pampinelli, standing back in the widow-alcove at the -right, in a state of puzzled irresolution, reacts, physically, to -this last observation, causing an abrupt movement of the drapery. -But, neither Ritter nor his wife are looking in that direction at the -moment._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Laying the remaining roses on the table_] She says I -ought to go on with the work. - -RITTER. [_Dryly_] She meant the housework. [_He replaces his cigar in -his mouth._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Looking at him with a touch of resentment_] No, she -didn’t mean anything of the kind. She says I ought to go to New York. -[_He takes the cigar from his mouth and looks at her keenly._] - -RITTER. And what would you do when you’d _get_ there? - -MRS. RITTER. Why, I’d go on the stage, of course. - -RITTER. [_Very level_] How? - -MRS. RITTER. Why, I’d go to the people that have charge of it. - -RITTER. And, do you think they’d put you on the stage simply because -you wanted to _go_ on it? - -MRS. RITTER. Well, Mrs. Pampinelli could give me a letter-- - -RITTER. Hum! - -MRS. RITTER. So that I’d have it when I’d _get_ there. - -RITTER. That’d do you a lot of good. You’d find a _thousand_ there -ahead of you, with letters from Mrs. Pampinellis. Nobody in New York -knows Mrs. Pampinelli; and if they did, it’d probably _kill_ any -chance that a person _might_ have otherwise. [_Mrs. Pampinelli can -contain herself no longer. She flips the window-drapery aside with -a deft movement and stands looking at Ritter, from a great height. -Mrs. Ritter, who is facing the window, utters an abrupt shriek of -astonishment. Then Ritter turns, rather casually, to see the cause of -his wife’s agitation, and finds himself looking into the frozen eyes of -Mrs. Pampinelli. He regards her rather impersonally, and then quietly -reaches up and secures his collar and tie. She steps majestically from -the window-alcove and moves a bit nearer to him, still holding him with -an icy stare._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_After a devastating pause_] You creature. - -RITTER. [_Turning smoothly away, to his left, as though he had been -suddenly struck by something, in the right eye_] Another _actress_. -[_He moves along a few steps to the left, in front of the table, then -turns and speaks to Mrs. Pampinelli over his left shoulder._] What did -you do, come through the window? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I’ve been _hiding_ here. - -RITTER. [_Resuming his walk over to the left_] I don’t blame -you,--after that show; I’ve been doing the same thing myself. [_He sits -in the arm-chair over at the left._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Who has been standing in a panic in the middle of the -room, staring wide-eyed at Mrs. Pampinelli_] Oh, Mrs. Pampinelli,--you -_didn’t_ hear what he’s been saying? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Every word. [_She very regally deposits her fan upon -the piano, and Mrs. Ritter, turning to Ritter, makes a long, moaning -sound._] - -MRS. RITTER. Now, Fred Ritter, you see what you’ve done! [_She bursts -into tears, and comes down to the chair at the left of the table below -the piano and sits down._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Moving to a point above the table_] And I wouldn’t -have missed it. I’ll know how to regard this gentleman in the future. I -came home hurriedly with these few flowers as a little acknowledgment -of the appreciation your work deserved; and all I hear is abuse; and a -very crude, but very venomous attempt at satire. [_Mrs. Ritter weeps -aloud._] Control yourself, darling, I wouldn’t please him. - -RITTER. [_Quietly_] She’s acting again. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Withering him with a glance_] You barbarian! [_To -Mrs. Ritter_] Pull yourself together, dear. - -MRS. RITTER. Oh, I just _can’t_, Mrs. Pampinelli. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Addressing Ritter directly, and indicating Mrs. -Ritter_] Look at the state of emotion you’ve got this poor girl into! - -RITTER. She’s an emotional actress. [_Mrs. Ritter bursts forth again._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Savage! [_To Mrs. Ritter_] Let me get you something, -darling. - -MRS. RITTER. Call Jenny. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes, dear. [_She crosses to a point just to the left -of the middle of the room, then stops and calls toward the door at -the left._] Jenny dear, _SURPRISE_! [_Ritter listens, with a puzzled -expression._] Come here, Jenny,--SURPRISE! [_Ritter turns around in the -chair, to his right, and looks at her curiously. She meets his eyes -with steady bitterness. Then he shifts his gaze to his wife._] - -RITTER. Why didn’t you take your make-up off? - -MRS. RITTER. I forgot it,--I was so worried about you. - -RITTER. You look like a Dutch squaw. [_She bursts into tears again._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Hastening over to her_] Let her alone! Don’t mind -him, Paula. - -RITTER. She’s all made up! and it’s coming off. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, what if it is? - -RITTER. [_Settling back into the arm-chair_] I don’t want to be -reminded of that show. [_Jenny enters hurriedly from the door at the -left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Mrs. Ritter is ill, Jenny. [_Jenny comes quickly -across, above the table at the left._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Half turning to her_] My smelling-salts, Jenny. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Standing back of Mrs. Ritter_] Her smelling-salts, -dear. - -JENNY. [_Hurrying out through the center-door_] Yes, mam. - -MRS. RITTER. They’re in my bureau-basket. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning and calling after Jenny_] In her -bureau-basket, Jenny. - -JENNY. [_Running up the stairs_] Yes, mam, I know where they are. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Gathering up the roses from the table_] Let me take -these flowers out of your way, dear. You’ve been treated abominably. -Although your husband’s attitude is entirely consistent with that -of the average husband’s, after his wife has distinguished herself. -[_Ritter makes a little sound of amusement, and she glares at him._] -And any observations of Mr. Ritter’s to the contrary, you _did_ -distinguish yourself tonight, Paula. [_She turns to her right and puts -the roses on the piano._] - -RITTER. [_Sitting away down in the arm-chair, smoking_] So did the -Cherry Sisters. [_Mrs. Ritter weeps again._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning back again from the piano to Mrs. Ritter_] -We are not talking to you at all, sir. [_Mrs. Ritter has a slight -coughing spell._] - -MRS. RITTER. Will you get me a drink of water, please? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Certainly, darling, where is it? - -MRS. RITTER. You’ll find it just inside the breakfast-room. [_Mrs. -Pampinelli sails across the room towards the left door. Just as she -is passing back of Ritter’s chair, he turns and looks at her, and the -excessive grandeur of her manner causes him to burst out laughing. But -she simply freezes him with a look and goes out through the left door. -He continues to laugh; and Mrs. Ritter, not having seen the cause of -his laughter, stops crying and turns and looks at him, very troubled._] -Fred Ritter, you’re acting to me tonight--just like a man that’d be -losing his mind! [_He looks over at her._] I really thought that was -what was the matter with you when I first came in! - -RITTER. [_Very confidentially_] Listen--When I didn’t lose my mind -watching that show tonight, I couldn’t go nutty if I tried. - -MRS. RITTER. Well, if anybody else comes here tonight, you just keep -that kind of talk to yourself. There were lots of people there that -thought it was wonderful. Look at all these flowers. - -RITTER. These flowers were all paid for long before anybody saw that -show. [_There is a staccato tap at the front door-bell. Jenny is -hurrying down the stairs with the smelling-salts._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Rising, and trying to fix herself up a bit_] Well, -that’s only your opinion. [_She starts for the center-door._] This -is very likely Nelly Fell. [_Turning back to him as she nears the -center-door_] Now, don’t you say anything to _her_, remember! She likes -you. - -MRS. FELL. [_In the right hallway_] No, I think I can manage, Theodore. -[_Jenny hands Mrs. Ritter the smelling-salts, at the center-door._] - -MRS. RITTER. Thanks, Jenny. - -JENNY. You’re welcome. [_She hurries out into the right hallway, and -Mrs. Ritter comes forward to the chair below the piano, sniffing the -salts. Ritter rises and saunters around and up to the left of the -arm-chair._] - -MRS. FELL. You can close that door, if you will! Couldn’t wait for you, -Jenny! [_She rushes in from the right hallway._] I’m too much excited! -[_She plants herself in the center-door, holding aloft in her right -hand a beautiful basket of tulips, and in her left, a huge bouquet of -violets._] Well, here _I_ am, with _my_ frankincense and myrrh! [_She -gives an hysterical giggle and teeters forward towards Mrs. Ritter._] -Oh, there you are, Frederick Ritter! We thought something had happened -to you! Pauline, dear child, I’ve come to worship at your shrine. [_She -places the basket of tulips down on the floor to the left of Mrs. -Ritter, then straightens up, regards Mrs. Ritter, giggles frantically, -and looks over at Ritter._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Laughing wanly, and trying generally not to appear as -though she’d been crying_] You’ve been very sweet. - -MRS. FELL. Not half so sweet as you were on that stage tonight! -[_Speaking confidentially, and with great conviction_] Dear child, -you’re made! Absolutely made! [_Turning to Ritter_] Isn’t she, -Frederick? [_But he’s busy getting rid of some ashes in the fireplace, -so she returns to Mrs. Ritter._] It’s one of those overnight things -that one reads about! [_She picks up the basket of tulips from the -floor and teeters around above the table._] Dear me, look at this -wilderness of flowers! [_She sets the basket on the table._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Trying not to cry_] Yes, yes, aren’t they beautiful! -[_She darts a look at Ritter._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Rapturously_] Not another word until I’ve kissed you! -[_She kisses her on the left side of the head._] Oh, you sweet child! -[_She shakes Mrs. Ritter by the shoulders._] what can I _say_ to -you! [_Then she teeters to the middle of the room, addressing Ritter -directly._] See here, young man! Why aren’t you just _pelting_ your -wife with these flowers? [_He tries to hide his appreciation of the -situation by turning away his head._] Answer me! [_He bursts out -laughing, and Nelly teeters back towards Mrs. Ritter._] My dear, the -man is so pleased he can’t talk! [_Ritter laughs a little more._] -And if you were any other woman but his wife, Paula, he’d be sending -you mash-notes! [_Ritter begins to laugh again, and Nelly teeters -towards him._] Oh, you can laugh all you like, Frederick Ritter, -but you can’t fool Nelly Fell! [_She comes back towards Mrs. Ritter, -addressing her._] I’ve had three husbands,--I know their tricks. [_She -places her finger on Mrs. Ritter’s shoulder._] Pauline, dear child, -you may be sure that that young man is proud of you tonight if he -never was before. [_Mrs. Ritter tries to laugh._] And when he gets you -alone--[_Mrs. Ritter’s attempt at laughter is instantly abandoned, and -she gives a startled glance toward Ritter, who turns away to his left -and goes up towards the mantelpiece._] Oh, when he gets you alone! -[_Mrs. Fell turns slowly and looks toward Ritter, with a roguish -expression and a measured shaking of her finger at him._] He’s going -to tell you you were the loveliest thing that ever stepped on a stage. -If he hasn’t done so already. Have you, Frederick? [_She looks at him -with a mischievous eye._] Have you? [_He laughs, at the irony of the -situation. She crosses towards him._] Come on, ’fess up!--I know the -position is difficult! [_He laughs hard, and she laughs with him; then -turns back to Mrs. Ritter. Jenny comes in from the right hallway._] You -see, my dear, the man is so pleased he can’t talk! [_She sees Jenny -passing along the hallway and steps quickly up to the center-door._] -Oh, Jenny dear! Will you take these violets out and put them in some -water. - -JENNY. [_Taking the violets_] Yes, mam. [_Mrs. Pampinelli enters at the -left door, with a glass of water._] - -MRS. FELL. I’m afraid they’ll be all withered. [_Jenny continues on -into the left hallway. Mrs. Fell turns around into the room again._] -Where’s Mrs. P.? [_Sees Mrs. Pampinelli_] Oh, there you are! I was just -wondering where you were. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Crossing above the table at the left, towards Mrs. -Ritter_] Did you get the smelling-salts, Jenny? - -JENNY. Yes, mam, I gave them to Mrs. Ritter. [_She goes out at the left -hallway._] - -MRS. RITTER. Yes, Betty, I have them. - -MRS. FELL. [_Coming a step or two forward_] Well, Betty, you see we -managed to get them all here. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Back of the table below the piano, and at Mrs. -Ritter’s left_] Here, try and drink this, Paula. [_Mrs. Ritter takes -the water and tries to drink it; and Mrs. Pampinelli leans solicitously -over her. There is a pause._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Coming anxiously down at Mrs. Ritter’s left_] What’s the -matter?--[_She looks at Mrs. Pampinelli._] Is Paula sick? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Straightening up, and very imperiously_] The -_critic_--has been giving his impressions of our play. - -MRS. FELL. Who? [_She turns towards Ritter._] This critic here, you -mean? [_She indicates Ritter and then looks at Mrs. Pampinelli. Mrs. -Pampinelli inclines her head, with the suggestion of a derisive smile, -and passes up to the center-door. Mrs. Fell crosses quickly towards -Ritter._] What have you been saying, Frederick Ritter?--Huh? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Laying the glass of water down on the table_] Oh, what -does it matter, Nelly, what he’s been saying! - -MRS. FELL. [_Turning sharply to Mrs. Ritter_] What? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Trying not to cry_] I say--I say [_She bursts into -tears._] I say what does it matter what he’s been saying! - -MRS. FELL. It doesn’t matter in the least, as far as I’m -concerned--[_Mrs. Pampinelli turns at the center-door and comes forward -slowly in the middle of the room._] there’s only one thing he _could_ -say, if he told the truth. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Laying her hand on Mrs. Fell’s left arm_] Eleanor, -dear child,--husbands are not always particular about telling the -truth--where the abilities of their wives are concerned. If _I_ had -listened to the promptings of my own soul, instead of to my husband, -when I was a younger woman, I should in all probability be one of the -leading figures in the American Theatre today. But I was fool enough, -like a lot of other women, to believe that my husband had my welfare -at heart,--when the fact of the matter was, as I see it now, when -it’s too late,--he was simply jealous of my artistic promise. [_The -cuckoo-clock strikes the midnight hour. Ritter turns and looks up at -it, then glances at Mrs. Pampinelli. She is looking up at the clock -distrustfully. Mrs. Fell raises her eyes discreetly to it, then drops -them to the floor._] Why, the night I played Hazel Kirke, I had my best -friends in tears: yet, when I returned from the hall, and the entire -town of Cohoes ringing with my name,--my husband had the effrontery to -tell me that I was so terrific he was obliged to leave the hall before -the end of the first act. So,--[_She turns to Mrs. Ritter._] if this -gentleman here has set himself up as your critic, Paula,--remember _my_ -story,--the actress without honor in her own house. [_She sweeps across -below the piano to the window._] Is my car out here, Nelly? - -MRS. FELL. [_Moving over a bit towards Mrs. Ritter_] Yes, it’s there. I -told Matthew he needn’t bother coming back for me, that you’d take me -home. [_Mrs. Ritter begins to cry softly, and Mrs. Fell steps to her -left and puts her hand on her shoulder._] Don’t do that, Paula. [_She -turns sharply and goes towards Ritter._] What was the matter with that -performance, Frederick Ritter? - -RITTER. [_Over at the left, below the mantelpiece_] Why, they didn’t -even know their lines! - -MRS. RITTER. [_Straightening up abruptly and looking at him, -reproachfully_] Oh! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning sharply from the window_] That is a -falsehood! They ran over every line last night, right here in this -room,--and they knew--practically all of them. - -RITTER. What good was that, if they couldn’t remember them on the stage. - -MRS. RITTER and MRS. PAMPINELLI, together. - - MRS. RITTER. [_To Ritter_] I _could_ remember them on the stage! - [_Turning to Mrs. Pampinelli_] I never missed _one_ line! - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_To Ritter_] They _could_ remember them on the - stage! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_To Mrs. Ritter_] Not a line. - -RITTER. She and that other woman sat there blinking at the audience -like a couple of sparrow-hawks. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. They did nothing of the kind. - -MRS. FELL. Of course they didn’t! - -RITTER. [_Speaking directly to Mrs. Fell_] How do you know? _You_ -weren’t out there. - -MRS. FELL. I could see them through the scenery, couldn’t I? And they -didn’t look anything _like_ a couple of sparrow-hawks,--as you say. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Contemptuously_] Well, as I have never seen a couple -of sparrow-hawks, I cannot appreciate the comparison. - -RITTER. Well, you’d have seen a couple tonight, if you’d been with me. - -MRS. RITTER. Oh, don’t argue with him, Betty! He’s only trying to be -smart. - -RITTER. Why didn’t one of them _say_ something? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What could they have said? - -RITTER. Why, any commonplace! It’d have been better than just sitting -there blinking. [_Mrs. Ritter weeps._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. One can’t be commonplace in high comedy. - -RITTER. Was that what it was? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Bitterly_] What did you _think_ it was? - -RITTER. [_Turning and going up to the center-door_] _You_ tell her, -Nelly; I haven’t got the heart. - -MRS. FELL. [_Moving a little towards the right_] You bold thing. -[_Nelly is wearing the gown she wore in the preceding act, and a heavy -cloak of old-rose-colored velvet. She lays her hand on Mrs. Ritter’s -left shoulder._] Don’t let him upset you this way, Paula. [_There is a -little pause. Ritter turns at the center-door and comes forward again -at the left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Picking up her fan from the piano_] I suppose _you_ -would have eclipsed Edwin Booth, if _you_ had been up there. - -RITTER. Well, I’d have known better than to sit there blinking at the -audience. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Turning sharply to him_] I didn’t _blink_ at the -audience. - -MRS. FELL. Don’t answer him, honey. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What could they have done under the circumstances? - -RITTER. Why, they could have covered it up!--if they’d had any brains. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Covered it up with _what_? - -RITTER. Why, with anything! Impromptu conversation! [_Mrs. Fell looks -at Mrs. Pampinelli and smiles pityingly._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. And have the audience _laugh_ at them? - -RITTER. They laughed anyhow, didn’t they? - -MRS. FELL. [_Taking a step or two towards him_] That was not their -fault! - -RITTER. [_To Nelly_] Whose fault _was it_? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Imperiously, and moving over to a point above the -table at which Mrs. Ritter is sitting_] It was Mr. Spindler’s fault. - -RITTER. Mr. Spindler. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. He promised to attend to the various properties and he -did _not_ attend to them.--There was supposed to be a pen and ink on -the desk for Mrs. Rush to leave a note for Doctor Arlington;--and when -Paula sat down to write the note, there was no pen--and no ink. So she -simply had to go on sitting there until Mr. Spearing went off and got -them. - -RITTER. I thought he’d left town. - -MRS. FELL. Oh, he wasn’t gone so very long, Frederick Ritter! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Bitterly, to Mrs. Fell_] Not five minutes. - -RITTER. I thought the show’ud be over before he’d get back. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. The door wouldn’t open when he attempted to go back, -so he was obliged to go around to the other side. [_She illustrates the -circumstance by waving her fan in a circular gesture about the table. -Ritter bursts out laughing. Nelly glares at him, then looks to Mrs. -Pampinelli, who, with a deadly, level look, turns and moves haughtily -up towards the center-door._] - -RITTER. What happened to the skinny guy’s mustache, that it kept -falling off every other line? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to him, up near the center-door_] It only -fell off twice, don’t exaggerate. [_Ritter laughs again._] - -MRS. FELL. You bold thing! - -RITTER. How many times was it _supposed_ to fall off? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, what if it fell off a dozen times,--everybody -knew it wasn’t real! [_He roars._] - -MRS. FELL. It’s a lucky thing for you, Frederick Ritter, that you’re -not _my_ husband! - -RITTER. [_Quietly_] That goes both ways, Nelly. - -MRS. FELL. [_Moving across towards him_] Well,--when you do something -that you’ll get so many flowers that my limousine will have to make -three trips to get them to the various hospitals,--we may pay more -attention to what you have to say. [_She turns away and moves back -towards the center of the room, where Mrs. Pampinelli is just moving -forward from the center-door._] - -RITTER. I suppose most of the audience have gone with the flowers, -haven’t they? [_Nelly whirls round to retort, but Mrs. Pampinelli lays -a restraining hand upon her right arm._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With immortal authority_] Don’t answer him, -Eleanor--“Envy loves a lofty mark.” The next time we have a part that -calls for a very limited intelligence, we’ll engage Mr. Ritter for it. -[_She moves a little down to the right towards Mrs. Ritter._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Looking at Ritter_] Now! - -RITTER. [_Casually_] Well, if you do, he’ll know how to walk across the -stage without tripping every other step. - -MRS. FELL. Who tripped every other step? - -RITTER. [_Indicating his wife_] The weeping-willow there. [_Mrs. Ritter -begins to weep afresh._] - -MRS. FELL. It’s a wonder to me you’re not afraid to lie so! - -RITTER. She tripped when she first came through the door! I was looking -right at her. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to him_] She didn’t _fall_, did she? - -RITTER. No, but it looked for a while there as though she were going -to. [_Mrs. Ritter’s weeping becomes audible again._] I very nearly had -heart failure. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Laying her hand on Paula’s shoulder_] Don’t mind -him, Paula. - -RITTER. She tripped when she came _on_ the stage, she tripped when she -went _off_, and she tripped over the rug when she went over to the desk! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With measured finality_] She didn’t trip any oftener -than anybody else. [_He laughs._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Directly to Ritter_] No, nor half so often as some of the -others,--[_Turning towards Mrs. Pampinelli_] now that you speak of it! -[_She turns and goes up to the hallway._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I will admit that Mr. Hossefrosse is a bit -unsteady,--but that is due to his weak ankles. - -RITTER. What was the star’s unsteadiness due to? - -MRS. RITTER. The rugs! - -RITTER. [_Looking at her keenly_] What? - -MRS. RITTER and MRS. PAMPINELLI, together. - - MRS. RITTER. The rugs. - - MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Moving to the center of the room_] The rugs! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Those funny rugs--that they have down there. We didn’t -use them at the rehearsals,--and, naturally, when it came to the -performance,--Paula wasn’t accustomed to them. - -RITTER. She was accustomed to rugs at home, wasn’t she? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Tersely_] Well, she wasn’t at home on the stage. - -RITTER. [_With a gesture of complete acquiesence, and moving up towards -the center-door_] That’s my argument in a nutshell. [_Mrs. Pampinelli -stands frozen in the middle of the room, with an expression very much -as though she were trying mentally to assassinate him. He comes back -down again at the left, to his former position._] Why, I couldn’t hear -_two-thirds_ of what she said. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, evidently there were many people there who -_could_ hear what she said, for they laughed at all her points. [_She -turns and goes to the piano, where she picks up several roses. Mrs. -Fell comes forward through the center-door and down towards the piano._] - -RITTER. I wanted to laugh, too, but I was afraid somebody’d turn around -and _see_ me. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning to Mrs. Ritter_] Are you ready, Nelly? - -MRS. FELL. Yes, I’m ready. - -MRS. RITTER. Are you going, Betty? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Yes, I must, darling, it’s getting late. [_She places -her hand on Mrs. Ritter s shoulder._] Good night, dear. [_She passes up -towards the center-door._] - -MRS. RITTER. Good night, Betty. - -MRS. FELL. [_Laying her hand on Mrs. Ritter’s shoulder_] Good night, -Paula child. - -MRS. RITTER. Good night, Nelly. [_Nelly follows Mrs. Pampinelli._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Stopping in the center-door and turning to Ritter_] -Perhaps, at our _next_ performance,--Mr. Ritter will favor us with the -benefit of some of his suggestions. [_She regards him with a touch of -lofty amusement. He turns his head towards her and looks at her with a -kind of mischievous squint._] - -RITTER. [_Quite pleasantly_] There aren’t going to be any more -performances, Mrs. Pampinelli, as far as anybody in _this_ house is -concerned. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_After a steady pause_] No? [_He inclines his head in -quiet emphasis._] - -RITTER. Not until there’s a change in the management. [_There is -another taut pause._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Coldly_] Really? [_He inclines his head again._] -Then, I’m afraid we sha’n’t have you with us, Mr. Ritter. - -RITTER. [_Smiling_] I know very well you won’t have _me_ with you. -And as far as Mrs. Ritter’s concerned,--she’s got a very good home -here--and I love her; and any time she feels any dramatic instinct -coming on, there’s a very nice roomy attic upstairs, and she can -go up there and lock the door, and nobody’ll ever see or hear her. -But if she ever gets mixed up again in anything like that atrocity -I saw tonight,--I’m through. [_He speaks the last words with quiet -definiteness, and turns towards the door at the left._] And she’ll get -killed in the bargain. [_He hits the door open with the palm of his -hand and goes out. There is a slight pause: then Nelly Fell crosses -quickly towards the mantelpiece, addressing Ritter as she goes._] - -MRS. FELL. Why, Fred Ritter!--I’ve heard you say yourself that you -were in _favor_ of a Little Theatre in this city! - -RITTER. [_Coming in again through the door at the left, carrying his -overcoat, derby and scarf_] So I am! I say so again. [_He stops inside -the door._] But in the light of that cataclysm tonight, you’ll pardon -me if I add, that I do not see the connection. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Stepping forward to the middle of the room and -challenging him with a lift of her head and brows_] What did you -_expect_ to _see_, Mr. Ritter,--a finished performance from a group of -comparative amateurs? - -RITTER. I expected to see something almost as bad as what I -saw;--that’s the reason I _fainted_ last night and was unconscious for -twenty-four hours at the prospect of it. [_He turns to Mrs. Fell and -speaks quite colloquially._] And that’s the first time in my life I’ve -ever fainted. [_Nelly just gives him a look and turns her head away._] - -MRS. RITTER. Don’t mind him, Betty,--he’s only trying to show off. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With bitter amusement_] No, but I’m a bit -_curious_--to know just _how_ Mr. Ritter would expect to _accomplish_ -the establishment of a Little Theatre here, unless through the medium -of such performances as this one this evening. How else is our local -talent to be discovered--or developed? - -RITTER. Well, I’m equally curious, Mrs. Pampinelli, as to your exact -_qualifications_--as a discoverer or developer of talent for the -theatre. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. That is a very familiar attitude. People who _do_ -things--are constantly having their ability to do them called into -question. [_She moves a step further forward and towards Mrs. Ritter._] - -RITTER. I’m afraid that’s something you’ve read somewhere. [_She glares -at him._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. The theatre is a matter of instinct. - -RITTER. The theatre is a matter of qualifications,--the same as any -other profession; and it will only be _through_ those particular -qualifications that your Little Theatre will ever be brought -about. [_He crosses over in front of Mrs. Fell and up towards the -center-door._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Well, perhaps you will come to the rescue;--you -seem so familiar with the various necessities of the Little Theatre. -[_He stops, just to the left of the center-door, and looks at Mrs. -Pampinelli straight._] - -RITTER. [_Quietly_] I am also familiar, Mrs. Pampinelli, with a little -remark that Mr. Napoleon made on one occasion, a long time ago;--about -the immorality of assuming a position for which one is unqualified. -[_There is a pause,--he settles his coat on his arm, then moves slowly -out through the center-door into the hallway: while Mrs. Pampinelli, -with an expression of eternal exclusion, moves over between the piano -and the table towards the window._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Turning_] Fred Ritter, where are you going? - -RITTER. [_Lighting his cigar in the hallway, just outside the -center-door_] I haven’t the faintest idea. But I shouldn’t be surprised -if I’d go on the stage. - -MRS. FELL. [_Standing back of the arm-chair at the left_] One star is -enough in the family. - -RITTER. [_Bowing very graciously to her_] Applause--[_She turns away -and looks straight ahead. Then Ritter bows towards Mrs. Pampinelli._] -and great laughter--[_Mrs. Pampinelli isn’t looking at him, but she -knows that that is meant for her, so she simply moves another step -or two towards the window. Mrs. Ritter turns to see what Ritter is -doing. He takes a step and leans forward towards her, speaking rather -confidentially._] followed by booing. [_She turns back again and -starts to cry, while he continues out into the right hallway and up -the stairs. As he mounts the stairs, he holds aloft his lighted cigar, -after the fashion of a zealous bearer of the torch._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Picking up the orchids from the table below the -window_] Paula, you should have Jenny put these orchids in water; they -keep ever so long in a cool place. [_She comes across towards the left, -below the piano._] - -MRS. RITTER. Will you call her, Nelly? - -MRS. FELL. [_Crossing to meet Mrs. Pampinelli_] Give them to me, -Betty, I’ll take them out to her. [_Mrs. Pampinelli gives her the -orchids._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Tell her to put them in a cool place. [_Nelly starts -up for the center-door. The telephone-bell rings._] - -MRS. RITTER. Will you answer that, Nelly? - -MRS. FELL. [_Setting the orchids down on the chair in the left -hallway_] Certainly, darling. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Standing back of Mrs. Ritter’s chair_] If it’s -anything concerning the play, I shall be at home on Tuesday at two. - -MRS. FELL. [_At the telephone_] Yes?--Yes?--Who?--Oh,--well, wait just -one moment, please. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What is it? - -MRS. FELL. [_Holding the transmitter against her bosom and leaning over -the partition towards Mrs. Pampinelli_] It’s the Star Moving Picture -Company. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. What do they want? - -MRS. FELL. They want the address of Mrs. Ritter’s manager. [_Mrs. -Pampinelli gives a quick look at Mrs. Ritter._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_To Mrs. Ritter_] I anticipated this. [_She goes -quickly towards the center-door, laying her fan and roses on the left -partition-seat, as she passes out into the hallway._] Give it to me, -Nelly. [_Nelly hands her the telephone, and, picking up the orchids -from the chair, tiptoes back of Mrs. Pampinelli and in through the -center-door._] - -MRS. FELL. [_In an excited whisper to Mrs. Ritter_] What did I tell -you! [_She giggles nervously, shakes her finger at Mrs. Ritter, and -then watches Mrs. Pampinelli eagerly._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Into the telephone_] Hello-hello--This is Mrs. -Ritter’s manager speaking. Mrs. Pampinelli. Pampinelli. Mrs. J. _Duro_ -Pampinelli. Capital P--a--m, p--i--n, e--double l--i.--Correct. Yes--I -see--I see.--Well, how do you mean, a thousand dollars, a thousand -dollars a day, or a thous--I see. Well, just one moment, please. [_She -lowers the telephone and leans towards Mrs. Ritter, speaking in a -subdued tone._] The Star Moving Picture Company wants to know if Mrs. -Ritter will appear in a special production of tonight’s play before the -camera. - -MRS. FELL. [_Narrowing her left eye_] What’s the figure? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. One thousand dollars per week. - -MRS. FELL. [_Definitely_] Fifteen hundred. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Into the telephone_] Hello-hello! - -MRS. RITTER. [_Rising_] Maybe I’d better talk to them. - -MRS. FELL. [_Suggesting with a gesture that she be quiet and resume her -chair_] Please, dear. [_Mrs. Ritter meekly sits down again._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Into the telephone_] Why, I’m sorry,--but Mrs. -Ritter does not appear under fifteen hundred dollars per week. - -MRS. FELL. [_Watching her shrewdly_] Net! [_Mrs. Pampinelli turns and -looks at her sharply, and Nelly emphasizes what she said by inclining -her head: then Mrs. Pampinelli speaks into the telephone again._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Net. - -MRS. FELL. [_To Mrs. Pampinelli_] It’s a bargain at that. [_She nods -towards Mrs. Ritter._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Into telephone_] Twelve-fifty? - -MRS. FELL. No compromise. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Into telephone_] Well, just one moment. [_Covering -the transmitter and speaking to Mrs. Fell_] Twelve-fifty is offered. - -MRS. FELL. [_Definitely_] Fifteen hundred dollars. They’ll lift it. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Turning back to the telephone_] Why, I’m very -sorry,--but Mrs. Ritter positively does not appear under fifteen -hundred dollars. [_Nelly inclines her head towards her._] Net. Well, -how do you mean satisfactory? Satisfactory at our figure? [_Mrs. -Pampinelli glances at Mrs. Fell and Mrs. Fell glances at Mrs. Ritter._] - -MRS. FELL. [_To Mrs. Pampinelli_] Sign! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Into the telephone_] Very well, then,--signed at -fifteen hundred dollars per week,-- - -MRS. FELL. Net! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Into the telephone_] Net! And Mrs. Ritter appears. -[_She stands holding the telephone and listening._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Whirling round and teetering down to Paula_] Our STAR! I -always said it! [_She shakes Mrs. Ritter by the shoulders._] I always -said it! [_She whirls round and teeters up towards the center-door._] -Haven’t I always said it, Betty? [_Mrs. Pampinelli is listening on -the telephone, and tries, by dint of thrusting the telephone towards -Nelly, to silence her. But Nelly is irrepressible._] That it was only -a question of time? [_She turns and flies down towards Mrs. Ritter -again._] We must telephone Mrs. Livingston at once, Paula! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Be quiet, Nelly, be quiet! - -MRS. FELL. [_Rushing up towards the center-door again_] She’ll be so -interested! We must call up Mrs. Livingston right away, Betty! - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Please, Nelly! [_Nelly is silenced. Mrs. Pampinelli -listens sharply, Nelly and Mrs. Ritter watching her; and there is a -dead pause._] Beg pardon? [_There is another slight pause; and then -Mrs. Pampinelli utters an abrupt shriek and sets down the telephone._] - -MRS. FELL. What is it, Betty? [_Mrs. Pampinelli looks at her, then -straight ahead._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_With venomous enunciation_] It’s Ritter! [_Mrs. -Ritter rises slowly._] - -MRS. FELL. Ritter? [_Mrs. Pampinelli doesn’t stir._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Addressing Mrs. Pampinelli_] Fred? - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I recognized his voice. [_She moves along the left -hallway and comes in through the center-door and forward, a little to -the left of the center of the room._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Up just to the right of the center-door_] Why, where is he? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Beginning to cry_] He must be on the extension upstairs. -[_Nelly listens keenly._] - -MRS. FELL. It is he; I hear him laughing. [_She crosses down to the -door at the left._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Taking a step towards Mrs. Ritter_] Sit down, -Paula. [_Mrs. Ritter sits down, rests her elbows on the table and weeps -bitterly. Nelly stops over at the door and turns._] - -MRS. FELL. [_Positively_] Paula,--if he were _my_ husband, I should -lose no time in having him arrested. [_She goes out, at the left door._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. [_Standing back of Mrs. Ritter’s chair_] Paula dear, -I do hope that you are not going to allow Mr. Ritter’s flippancies to -discourage you. [_Paula clasps her hands in her lap and looks tearfully -at the backs of them._] The way of the essential artist is always hard; -and so very frequently the most serious obstacles are those to be -encountered at home. - -MRS. RITTER. But, I feel so unsuccessful. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. I know, dear--I know exactly how you feel. But you -must _go on_. Just remember that art is the highest expression of -truth,--and you cannot fail. For you have everything in your favor, -Paula. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Weakly_] Thank you. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. And the masses need you, dear; you are an altogether -_new note_ in the theatre. - -MRS. RITTER. But--I don’t know whether Fred’ll _want_ me to go on any -more--[_Mrs. Pampinelli suddenly becomes very still and stoney, and -looks down at Mrs. Ritter with merciless inquiry. Mrs. Ritter senses -the change and turns hastily to explain._] the way he spoke. - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. And, do you mean that you will allow him to _stop_ -you, Paula? - -MRS. RITTER. [_Breaking down under Mrs. Pampinelli’s frozen amusement_] -Well, of course, he’s my _husband_, Betty. [_She cries. Mrs. Pampinelli -regards her with a kind of pained toleration; and settles her cloak, -preparatory to going._] - -MRS. PAMPINELLI. Very well, then, Paula--if you feel that way about -it, I should advise you to keep him; and I shan’t waste any more of my -time encouraging you. [_She sweeps around to her left and up towards -the center-door._] There are far too many who are only too _willing_ to -make the necessary sacrifices without being urged. [_She picks up her -fan and roses from the partition-seat, lays them across her left arm, -and turns regnantly to Mrs. Ritter._] Only remember this, Paula,--there -will be actresses when husbands are a thing of the past. [_She sweeps -out through the center-door and out into the right hallway. There is -a slight pause; then Nelly Fell comes in at the left door. She misses -Mrs. Pampinelli._] - -MRS. FELL. Where is Mrs. P., Paula? - -MRS. RITTER. She’s just gone out to the car, Nelly. - -MRS. FELL. [_Stooping to pick up one of the chrysanthemums from the -floor_] Do you mind if I take one of these flowers, Paula? [_She stands -in the middle of the room, holding it, and looking at Mrs. Ritter._] I -want it for my dramatic shrine. - -MRS. RITTER. You can take them all if you like. - -MRS. FELL. Why, what would _you_ do, dear? - -MRS. RITTER. I don’t want them. - -MRS. FELL. [_Crossing towards her_] Now, you mustn’t feel like that, -Paula Ritter. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Having all she can do to keep from crying_] I just can’t -help it. - -MRS. FELL. I see in your husband’s attitude--nothing but a desperate -attempt to save his home;--for he _must_ know what your performance -tonight will inevitably lead to. [_Mrs. Ritter turns with a puzzled -expression and looks at her._] - -MRS. RITTER. I don’t understand what you mean, Nelly. - -MRS. FELL. Why, you must go to New York, dear; you can do nothing -dramatically here. - -MRS. RITTER. But, I have a husband. - -MRS. FELL. [_Very casually_] Every married woman has that cross, -darling. But you mustn’t let it stand in the way of your career; he -would very soon eliminate _you_, if you stood in the way of _his_. - -MRS. RITTER. But, I don’t like the thought of breaking up his home, -Nelly. [_Nelly gives a hard, knowing little laugh._] - -MRS. FELL. Don’t be unnecessarily sacrificial, darling. I made that -mistake with my first _two_ husbands; but I was _wiser_ with the third. -And I said to him, immediately we returned from the church, I said, -“Now, Leonard, you and I have just been made one; and _I_ am that one.” -[_She touches herself on the breastbone with her forefinger, then -touches Paula on the left shoulder._] And it worked out beautifully. -So be sensible, darling. [_She skips up towards the hallway._] I must -run along, Mrs. Pampinelli’s waiting! [_She teeters out through the -center-door into the right hallway._] Cheerio, Paula darling! - -MRS. RITTER. Good night. - -MRS. FELL. Cheerio! [_She giggles and vanishes into the right hallway. -Mrs. Ritter sits still for a second, looking from side to side, -at nothing, particularly, and presently gets up. The horseshoe of -“SUCCESS” over in front of the mantelpiece catches her eye, and she -wanders slowly towards it. But the irony of it all overcomes her and -she commences to cry again. Ritter appears at the head of the stairs -and starts down. She turns and looks at him, as he comes through the -center-door._] - -MRS. RITTER. Fred Ritter, those women will never come inside that door -again, the way you talked to them. [_He moves to the piano and leans -against it._] - -RITTER. Well, I don’t suppose that’ll make very much difference. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Looking straight ahead_] Well, it _should_ make a -difference. - -RITTER. They’d hardly come here to see _me_, anyway. - -MRS. RITTER. Well, they’d come to see me. - -RITTER. But _you_ won’t be here. [_She turns and looks at him blankly._] - -MRS. RITTER. Why,--what--what do you mean, I won’t be here? - -RITTER. [_With a touch of delicacy_] Why, aren’t you going on with _The -Work_? - -MRS. RITTER. Well, I don’t want to go unless you _want_ me to. - -RITTER. But, I _do_ want you to. I don’t think a talent like yours -should be hidden; [_He looks straight out, thoughtfully._] it’s too -unique. - -MRS. RITTER. I thought you said a while ago you didn’t like me? - -RITTER. [_Raising his left hand and crossing over and down in front of -her towards the arm-chair at the left_] You mustn’t hold me responsible -for what I said a while ago--[_He stops back of the arm-chair and rests -his hand upon the back of it._] I was panic-stricken at the thought of -having my home broken up. [_She moves down to the center of the room._] -But I’ve been thinking it over upstairs, and I’ve concluded that it’s -more important that the world should see you act, than that I should -have a home to come to. - -MRS. RITTER. But, I don’t like the thought of breaking up your home, -Fred. - -RITTER. [_Raising his right hand to her with a touch of solemnity_] You -mustn’t consider me in the matter at all, dear. Every great gift has -its victim--and I am, in a way, rather happy--to find myself chosen the -victim of yours. - -MRS. RITTER. What would _you_ do, if I were to go? - -RITTER. [_With the faintest shade of classic pose_] I’d go with you; -you’d need someone to look after the flowers--see that they got to the -various hospitals all right. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Looking away out_] I might not like it, after I’d get -there. - -RITTER. Maybe not. I suppose fame becomes monotonous like everything -else. But, I wouldn’t want you in the future, to look back and feel -that I had stood in your way. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Carefully_] No, Fred,--I really don’t _know_ whether I -want to be a great actress or not. - -RITTER. But, you are a great actress, dear. - -MRS. RITTER. Thank you. - -RITTER. [_Indicating the anchor of roses down at the left_] Look at -this anchor,--of hope. [_He steps back and picks up the horseshoe._] -And this horseshoe of “SUCCESS.” [_He brings it forward and sets it -down just to Mrs. Ritter’s left. Then he steps across in front of -it, takes her hand and slips his right arm around her waist._] And I -think, Paula, it might be a very sensible move, to just let the public -_remember_ you as a great actress--as they saw you _tonight_--_at your -best_. - -MRS. RITTER. [_Looking wistfully straight ahead_] Do you think they -_will_ remember, Fred? - -RITTER. [_Inclining his head, with a suggestion of the obsequious_] -Yes, I _think_ they will. [_Curtain._] - -MRS. RITTER. [_Turning and sinking into his arms_] You’re awfully -sweet, Fred. - - -THE END OF THE PLAY - - - - -TRANSCRIBER’S NOTES: - - - Italicized text is surrounded by underscores: _italics_. - - Obvious typographical errors have been corrected. - - Inconsistencies in typesetting have been standardized. - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Torch-Bearers, by George Kelly - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE TORCH-BEARERS *** - -***** This file should be named 60523-0.txt or 60523-0.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/6/0/5/2/60523/ - -Produced by Tim Lindell, David E. Brown, Buley Library -(Southern Connecticut State University) and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -book was produced from images made available by the -HathiTrust Digital Library.) - - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part -of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm -concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark, -and may not be used if you charge for the eBooks, unless you receive -specific permission. If you do not charge anything for copies of this -eBook, complying with the rules is very easy. You may use this eBook -for nearly any purpose such as creation of derivative works, reports, -performances and research. They may be modified and printed and given -away--you may do practically ANYTHING in the United States with eBooks -not protected by U.S. copyright law. Redistribution is subject to the -trademark license, especially commercial redistribution. - -START: FULL LICENSE - -THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE -PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK - -To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free -distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work -(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full -Project Gutenberg-tm License available with this file or online at -www.gutenberg.org/license. - -Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works - -1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to -and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property -(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all -the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or -destroy all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your -possession. If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a -Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound -by the terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the -person or entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph -1.E.8. - -1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be -used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who -agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few -things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See -paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this -agreement and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works. See paragraph 1.E below. - -1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the -Foundation" or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection -of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual -works in the collection are in the public domain in the United -States. If an individual work is unprotected by copyright law in the -United States and you are located in the United States, we do not -claim a right to prevent you from copying, distributing, performing, -displaying or creating derivative works based on the work as long as -all references to Project Gutenberg are removed. Of course, we hope -that you will support the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting -free access to electronic works by freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm -works in compliance with the terms of this agreement for keeping the -Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with the work. You can easily -comply with the terms of this agreement by keeping this work in the -same format with its attached full Project Gutenberg-tm License when -you share it without charge with others. - -1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern -what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are -in a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, -check the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this -agreement before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, -distributing or creating derivative works based on this work or any -other Project Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no -representations concerning the copyright status of any work in any -country outside the United States. - -1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: - -1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other -immediate access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear -prominently whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work -on which the phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the -phrase "Project Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, -performed, viewed, copied or distributed: - - This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and - most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no - restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it - under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this - eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the - United States, you'll have to check the laws of the country where you - are located before using this ebook. - -1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is -derived from texts not protected by U.S. copyright law (does not -contain a notice indicating that it is posted with permission of the -copyright holder), the work can be copied and distributed to anyone in -the United States without paying any fees or charges. If you are -redistributing or providing access to a work with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the work, you must comply -either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 or -obtain permission for the use of the work and the Project Gutenberg-tm -trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted -with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution -must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any -additional terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms -will be linked to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works -posted with the permission of the copyright holder found at the -beginning of this work. - -1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this -work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm. - -1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this -electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without -prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with -active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project -Gutenberg-tm License. - -1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, -compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including -any word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access -to or distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format -other than "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official -version posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site -(www.gutenberg.org), you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense -to the user, provide a copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means -of obtaining a copy upon request, of the work in its original "Plain -Vanilla ASCII" or other form. Any alternate format must include the -full Project Gutenberg-tm License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. - -1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, -performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works -unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing -access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -provided that - -* You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from - the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method - you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is owed - to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he has - agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the Project - Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments must be paid - within 60 days following each date on which you prepare (or are - legally required to prepare) your periodic tax returns. Royalty - payments should be clearly marked as such and sent to the Project - Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the address specified in - Section 4, "Information about donations to the Project Gutenberg - Literary Archive Foundation." - -* You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies - you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he - does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm - License. You must require such a user to return or destroy all - copies of the works possessed in a physical medium and discontinue - all use of and all access to other copies of Project Gutenberg-tm - works. - -* You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of - any money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the - electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days of - receipt of the work. - -* You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free - distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work or group of works on different terms than -are set forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing -from both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and The -Project Gutenberg Trademark LLC, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm -trademark. Contact the Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. - -1.F. - -1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable -effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread -works not protected by U.S. copyright law in creating the Project -Gutenberg-tm collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may -contain "Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate -or corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other -intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or -other medium, a computer virus, or computer codes that damage or -cannot be read by your equipment. - -1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right -of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project -Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all -liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal -fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT -LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE -PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE -TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE -LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR -INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH -DAMAGE. - -1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a -defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can -receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a -written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you -received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium -with your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you -with the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in -lieu of a refund. If you received the work electronically, the person -or entity providing it to you may choose to give you a second -opportunity to receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If -the second copy is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing -without further opportunities to fix the problem. - -1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth -in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS', WITH NO -OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT -LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. - -1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied -warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of -damages. If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement -violates the law of the state applicable to this agreement, the -agreement shall be interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or -limitation permitted by the applicable state law. The invalidity or -unenforceability of any provision of this agreement shall not void the -remaining provisions. - -1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the -trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone -providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in -accordance with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the -production, promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works, harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, -including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of -the following which you do or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this -or any Project Gutenberg-tm work, (b) alteration, modification, or -additions or deletions to any Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any -Defect you cause. - -Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm - -Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of -electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of -computers including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It -exists because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations -from people in all walks of life. - -Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the -assistance they need are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's -goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will -remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure -and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future -generations. To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation and how your efforts and donations can help, see -Sections 3 and 4 and the Foundation information page at -www.gutenberg.org Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation - -The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit -501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the -state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal -Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification -number is 64-6221541. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent permitted by -U.S. federal laws and your state's laws. - -The Foundation's principal office is in Fairbanks, Alaska, with the -mailing address: PO Box 750175, Fairbanks, AK 99775, but its -volunteers and employees are scattered throughout numerous -locations. Its business office is located at 809 North 1500 West, Salt -Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887. Email contact links and up to -date contact information can be found at the Foundation's web site and -official page at www.gutenberg.org/contact - -For additional contact information: - - Dr. Gregory B. Newby - Chief Executive and Director - gbnewby@pglaf.org - -Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation - -Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide -spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of -increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be -freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest -array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations -($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt -status with the IRS. - -The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating -charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United -States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a -considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up -with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations -where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To SEND -DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any particular -state visit www.gutenberg.org/donate - -While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we -have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition -against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who -approach us with offers to donate. - -International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make -any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from -outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. - -Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation -methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other -ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. To -donate, please visit: www.gutenberg.org/donate - -Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works. - -Professor Michael S. Hart was the originator of the Project -Gutenberg-tm concept of a library of electronic works that could be -freely shared with anyone. For forty years, he produced and -distributed Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of -volunteer support. - -Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed -editions, all of which are confirmed as not protected by copyright in -the U.S. unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not -necessarily keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper -edition. - -Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search -facility: www.gutenberg.org - -This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, -including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to -subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. - |