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-The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Great Day for the Irish, by A. M. Lightner
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-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
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-have to check the laws of the country where you are located before using
-this ebook.
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-Title: A Great Day for the Irish
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-Author: A. M. Lightner
-
-Release Date: December 4, 2019 [EBook #60846]
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-Language: English
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-Character set encoding: ASCII
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-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A GREAT DAY FOR THE IRISH ***
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-</pre>
-
-
-<div class="figcenter">
- <img src="images/cover.jpg" width="340" height="500" alt=""/>
-</div>
-
-<hr class="chap" />
-
-<div class="titlepage">
-
-<h1>A GREAT DAY FOR THE IRISH</h1>
-
-<h2>By A. M. LIGHTNER</h2>
-
-<p class="ph1"><i>Watchdogs have to be<br />
-watched or they keep everything<br />
-out&mdash;including our friends!</i></p>
-
-<p>[Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from<br />
-Worlds of If Science Fiction, May 1960.<br />
-Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that<br />
-the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]</p>
-
-</div>
-
-<hr class="chap" />
-
-<p>Bridget Kelly stood at the foot of the rocket lift and watched the
-loading operation. The freight had long since been inspected and
-stowed, and now it was the passengers' turn. Bridget was glad that for
-once she was not responsible. Let others worry and snoop. This time she
-was a passenger herself, starward bound. Inspected, passed and okayed,
-she could have the pleasure of watching others squirm.</p>
-
-<p>Like that beauty coming aboard with the furs and the orchid. She
-wouldn't be allowed to keep the orchid, of course. Bridget grinned as
-she saw the flower tossed into a trash can and imagined the words the
-beauty was mouthing. The man beside her sported a boutonniere. Yes,
-there it went into the can. He was still smiling, probably cracking
-wise. Bridget had separated so many travelers from so many items that
-she could tell what the passenger was going to say before he said it.</p>
-
-<p>Most people knew that strenuous efforts were being made to keep pests
-and epidemics away from Earth. Ever since the beginnings of space
-travel, the quarantine of incoming ships at the Moon had been rigidly
-observed. But the fact that plagues could also spread <i>from</i> Earth
-seldom registered on the public's mind.</p>
-
-<p>Bridget was all too well aware of it. For several years she had
-labored to that end in the Quarantine Service. Now that her savings
-had accumulated and her abilities as an entomologist were recognized,
-she was about to board one of the shining ships herself. There were
-raised eyebrows when her destination was known. An entomologist going
-to New Eden&mdash;a planet where insects were at a minimum. But Bridget only
-smiled. She knew what she wanted. She was bound for the frontier, where
-men are men and women are scarce.</p>
-
-<p>The speaker blared. The countdown was beginning.</p>
-
-<p>"Fifteen minutes!" rasped the mechanical voice. "Fifteen minutes to
-blast-off!"</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>She took a last look at the planet of her birth and squeezed into the
-lift. The few remaining passengers pushed in with her. A man in a red
-waistcoat was commiserating with the woman beside him.</p>
-
-<p>"Don't let the officials get you down," he said. "We'll have to put up
-with them for the journey. But on New Eden, I hear, the conditions are
-so good they hardly need any regulations at all."</p>
-
-<p>"It isn't that," sniffed his friend. "It's just that you gave it to me
-and I was hoping to wear it tonight."</p>
-
-<p>"Perhaps I can buy you something in hydroponics. I had no idea they
-were so touchy or I'd have had the orchid fumigated."</p>
-
-<p>Bridget felt the scorn of the official for the general public. "If
-you're going to New Eden, you ought to know we want to keep it that
-way."</p>
-
-<p>The red waistcoat looked down at her.</p>
-
-<p>"Oh, officialdom without stripes?" he said. "Or are you an old hand?
-Perhaps you can explain the deal before we get there."</p>
-
-<p>So he <i>was</i> the type that cracked wise, and she had put her foot in it
-right at the beginning.</p>
-
-<p>"I've never been off Earth before," she admitted. "I read up on it all
-first."</p>
-
-<p>The lift was at the lock door, and she slipped through without looking
-back. The speaker was croaking "Ten minutes to go" as she hurried to
-her cabin and prepared for takeoff. She'd have to do better than this
-or the trip would be a washout. Better just concentrate on enjoying
-it ... the new experiences ... the fascination of travel.</p>
-
-<p>The jets roared and Bridget Kelly blacked out.</p>
-
-<p>Several hours later she had recovered enough to spruce up, take the
-prescribed dose of covitron against space sickness, and make her way
-to the lounge. She found the table setting with her name on it and had
-hardly sat down before a familiar voice began at her ear.</p>
-
-<p>"Sure and if it isn't Bridget Kelly, and it's a long time I've been
-waiting for herself."</p>
-
-<p>She looked up into the same laughing eyes, only this time they were
-above an emerald-green waistcoat.</p>
-
-<p>"Still determined that New Eden shall not be polluted by snakes? Oh,
-excuse me, that was St. Patrick. You're worried about bugs."</p>
-
-<p>She laughed in spite of herself and glanced at the place card next
-hers. "Mr. Patch Maguire," it read.</p>
-
-<p>"I didn't mean to sound stuffy," she said. "It's just that most people
-don't realize how important it is ... how much trouble just a few
-insects ... well, I've worked at it and I ought to know."</p>
-
-<p>"Ah, an official entomologist. But in that case, why New Eden? Or
-are you insurance against people like Carrie and me who might import
-something?"</p>
-
-<p>"You never can tell. Something may turn up. It's hard to imagine a
-planet without any insects at all."</p>
-
-<p>"Eden's remarkable that way," put in the young officer sitting across
-from them. "No stinging bugs or parasites. Makes everything a lot more
-comfortable. Still, it's pretty new. Only a small part developed so
-far."</p>
-
-<p>"So we've insurance against the unknown in Bridget Kelly."</p>
-
-<p>"And what might <i>you</i> be insurance against, Mr. Maguire?" she countered.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>The officer stared. "Don't you folks know each other? Mr. Maguire's a
-grower of fancy plants. Sort of goes together ... plants and insects!"
-He laughed. "Well, it looks like the rest of our table won't show up
-for this meal."</p>
-
-<p>"What happened to the lady without the orchid? She was with you, wasn't
-she?" Bridget asked.</p>
-
-<p>"Carrie," said Patch Maguire, "is one of those unfortunates on whom
-covitron does not work. She won't be with anyone for the duration. I
-was just hoping our whole table was not similarly afflicted."</p>
-
-<p>"It's a pity," mused the young officer. "So many people make the flight
-across space only once. If they did it more often, they might get
-accustomed."</p>
-
-<p>"Don't you take covitron?" Bridget asked, beginning to wonder how soon
-she should repeat the dose. Some people said it made you sleepy, and
-she certainly didn't want that with things just getting started ... and
-Patch Maguire ... Patch Maguire....</p>
-
-<p>Suddenly a window opened in her mind. She saw a letter with short
-punching sentences. "You think you can get away with this high-handed,
-overbearing, totally uncalled-for destruction of property? I'll take
-it to the top! I'll see you idiots in hell ... or at least out of the
-Service!" Patch Maguire protesting the destruction of his shipment of
-seeds imported from Regulus V. No amount of explanation that the seeds
-had been found to harbor a blight which, once let loose on Earth....
-Patch Maguire had a reputation as an authority on crossbreeding and
-mutation of plants ... and also for throwing his weight around. It was
-several years ago, but Bridget remembered the consternation in the
-department.</p>
-
-<p>She realized that Maguire and the officer were talking. They were
-agreeing that space sickness was only a matter of psychology, and that
-if you just didn't think about it, no covitron was necessary. She
-hastily swallowed another pill with her coffee and hoped the coffee
-would keep her awake.</p>
-
-<p>They toured the ship together, she and Patch. They marveled at the
-scene from the viewport and chatted with the captain in the control
-room. The steward inquired about his taste in music and stereo, and he
-even gave advice to the gardeners in hydroponics. All doors were open
-to Patch, and there were murmurs about the "handsome couple" as they
-moved through the lounge. By the end of the trip they were making plans
-for New Eden. Patch insisted that Bridget was in the wrong profession
-and she agreed that the science of agriculture might be more rewarding
-than entomology under certain conditions.</p>
-
-<p>At the farewell dinner, Patch gave her a bouquet he'd had made up
-especially by the gardeners. But she was more interested in the small
-green leaf he wore in his lapel. He took it out and insisted on
-fastening it in her hair.</p>
-
-<p>"Sure and it's a shamrock!" he cried, as he arranged it. "And have you
-forgotten what day it is tomorrow?"</p>
-
-<p>"It's the day we land," Bridget replied. "But what day that is in our
-time or ship's time ... it's too confusing!"</p>
-
-<p>"It's St. Patrick's Day, that's what it is!" he said. "A great day
-for the Irish and a great day for us. And I wouldn't be without the
-shamrock on St. Patrick's Day! They should call the planet New Ireland,
-that they should. Wasn't Ireland the garden island, all green and
-fruitful and with no snakes? And I hear this planet's the garden planet
-and with no insects either to make life miserable. But let you and me
-be living there a while and we'll make it New Ireland for sure!"</p>
-
-<p>And he planted a kiss on her mouth without a thought of who was looking
-at them.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>As their tablemates drank their health, Bridget blushed and her eyes
-shone, and after dinner Patch escorted her to the stereo where they sat
-very close together in the dark. But as the pictures flashed across
-the screen and as Patch's arm went across her shoulder and drew her
-close, her mind was besieged by an army of little doubts. Shamrock ...
-shamrock ... what had she read about the shamrock?</p>
-
-<p>"Patch," she whispered. "Where did you get it?"</p>
-
-<p>"Get what?" Patch murmured, bending over to kiss her.</p>
-
-<p>"The shamrock, Patch? I don't believe they have it in hydroponics."</p>
-
-<p>"Sure, they must have it." Patch's lips brushed hers and she found it
-difficult to think clearly.</p>
-
-<p>"I never saw it there. Patch! Are you sure?"</p>
-
-<p>"Saw what? I don't see anything but you. That's enough for me."</p>
-
-<p>"About the shamrock, Patch!"</p>
-
-<p>"It looks beautiful on you. Sure and I wouldn't be without a shamrock
-on St. Patrick's Day."</p>
-
-<p>Bridget gave up. She lay back in the sanctuary of his arm and basked in
-the warm feeling of his lips on her hair. But the doubts kept crawling
-about in her mind. What was the matter with her? Couldn't she be happy
-when everything was perfect? Had she been a cut-and-dried inspector for
-too many years? But she remembered the words of Professor Schwarzkopf,
-the day she received her degree: "The inspectors are the watchdogs of
-the planets. Without them, all that man has built can be destroyed."</p>
-
-<p>When Patch had kissed her good night outside her cabin and his
-footsteps had died away along the corridor, she crept out into the
-passage and made her way to hydroponics.</p>
-
-<p>"Why, no," said the chief gardener, "we never carry clover of any sort.
-Why do you ask?"</p>
-
-<p>On her way to the control room, Bridget tried not to think. She found
-the young officer from her table on duty with the captain, and the two
-men listened in surprise as she outlined her fears.</p>
-
-<p>"I don't want to accuse Mr. Maguire of anything," she said. "I'm sure
-he doesn't realize how serious&mdash;and of course there may be nothing
-to it. It's just that I remember that shamrocks harbor the golden
-nematode&mdash;that is, in the soil around the roots. And it seems likely
-that if Mr. Maguire has live shamrocks&mdash;and I remember what a serious
-plague they once brought over from Ireland to America...."</p>
-
-<p>The captain pulled his mustache. "It's clearly against regulations. I
-can't imagine how he'd get it past inspection. But then, Maguire's a
-very persistent man and he's got pull in odd places. I don't want to
-rouse the ire of the Irish, but I see your point."</p>
-
-<p>"Couldn't you search his cabin&mdash;without his knowing I said to? Oh, I'm
-sure he'd be very angry. But if I could only look at his plants, then
-I'd be sure if they're safe. You must have ways of getting in&mdash;if there
-should be a short circuit or something in his cabin."</p>
-
-<p>"Oh, we have ways," the captain said. "Don't we, Lieutenant?"</p>
-
-<p>"Perhaps at breakfast," suggested the young officer. "If Miss Kelly
-could arrange to make it as leisurely as possible."</p>
-
-<p>"And right afterward you might go to the lieutenant's cabin&mdash;with your
-instruments and without Mr. Maguire."</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>She had no trouble in making her breakfast leisurely. She could hardly
-choke it down. Under Patch's admiring gaze and flagrant approval she
-was uncomfortably conscious of treachery. She left as soon as the
-protracted meal was over, even though she knew it would give him the
-opportunity to discover the rape of his plants.</p>
-
-<p>The lieutenant was waiting for her in his cabin. He sat behind his desk
-eyeing a motley collection of clover in an assortment of little jars
-and boxes. Bridget brought out her pocket 'scope and without a word
-pulled the first specimen up by the roots and began to examine it. The
-lieutenant watched in fascination.</p>
-
-<p>"It's a good thing Mr. Maguire can't see you now," he said. "He'd take
-an entirely different tone from the one I've been hearing lately."</p>
-
-<p>"I'm hoping he doesn't find out," she muttered. "What he doesn't
-know.... Oh! Oh! Look here! A fine big cyst! Now if they're all like
-this...."</p>
-
-<p>The lieutenant's face took on a look of respect. He came around
-from behind his desk and peered over her shoulder. "Found something
-already?" he asked.</p>
-
-<p>Bridget pushed the scope under his nose. "See that?" she said. "In the
-right-hand corner."</p>
-
-<p>"You mean that lump? Doesn't look very dangerous."</p>
-
-<p>"No, it doesn't. But it's a nematode cyst, all right. That little brown
-lump, if turned loose in the soil&mdash;give it a few years and you'll have
-a real pest on your hands."</p>
-
-<p>"You don't say. We'd better get rid of it right away. Do you think
-there's any more?"</p>
-
-<p>"That's just what I'm going to find out."</p>
-
-<p>But before she could move to the desk for the other containers there
-was a sound of scuffling outside, the door was flung violently open,
-and a rich, Irish voice proclaimed in righteous anger: "So here you
-are, conspiring against me! Both the culprits red-handed! And my
-shamrocks, my little plants, my babies! Thank heavens I got here in
-time!"</p>
-
-<hr class="chap" />
-
-<div class="figcenter">
- <img src="images/illus.jpg" width="650" height="464" alt=""/>
-</div>
-
-<hr class="chap" />
-
-<p>The lieutenant moved to intercept him. "I beg your pardon, sir, but
-these plants are in quarantine, and if you have any others we haven't
-found&mdash;"</p>
-
-<p>"You're no true daughter of Ireland, Bridget Kelly. And I'm fortunate
-to have found you out in time, false and faithless as you are!"</p>
-
-<p>"Now, now," cautioned the lieutenant, getting between Maguire and the
-desk. "She was only doing her duty. You should see the things she's
-been showing me in her microscope. A menace to the whole planet!"</p>
-
-<p>"Don't you believe a word of it!" thundered Maguire. "These inspectors
-are full of fears and fancies. Puffed up with their own importance.
-And I'll thank you to give me back my plants that you stole out of my
-cabin."</p>
-
-<p>"I'm afraid I can't do that," the lieutenant said. "Not until Miss
-Kelly has examined each one&mdash;and then only the ones that get a clean
-bill of health." And he began to collect the little pots and remove
-them as far as possible from Maguire's reach.</p>
-
-<p>"Well, come along then, Bridget&mdash;give them the bill of health," Maguire
-ordered. "You'll do that for me, I'm sure. And I don't know what all
-the fuss is about either, all over a few little plants, and shamrocks
-at that."</p>
-
-<p>"The few little plants have a few little cysts all through their
-roots," said Bridget, whose temper was wearing thin. "I've only looked
-at one so far, but as nice an infestation of the golden nematode I've
-seldom seen. It's got to go down the incinerator."</p>
-
-<p>"The incinerator!" screamed Maguire. "Woman! My shamrocks! All the way
-from Ireland!"</p>
-
-<p>"If you hadn't spent your whole life circumventing regulations and
-pulling wires, this wouldn't have happened. Why didn't you get them
-treated and certified before coming aboard?"</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>"Because there wasn't time, that's why!" Patch shouted. "They only came
-from Ireland as I was leaving for the ship. If it hadn't been for a
-snooping, sniveling worry-wart&mdash;all about a worm that you can't even
-see...."</p>
-
-<p>"You can see the results right enough!" Bridget's voice was rising to
-match his. "Did you ever hear of the Long Island potato? The best on
-the East Coast they were. The golden nematode ruined Long Island for
-potatoes. That's what the shamrock did for America! That's a sneaking,
-treacherous worm for you!"</p>
-
-<p>"And who would want to grow potatoes on Long Island, built up into a
-city as it is?"</p>
-
-<p>"They're going to want to grow potatoes on New Eden, and I'm here to
-see they can."</p>
-
-<p>"If that's all that's worrying you, I'll breed you a nematode-resistant
-potato. And now I'll thank you to let me take my shamrocks and make an
-end to this disgraceful scene."</p>
-
-<p>But when he looked around, he found the lieutenant had quietly removed
-himself with the plants, and the door of the cabin was crowded with
-interested passengers.</p>
-
-<p>"So you think you've put one over on me!" Patch shouted. "It's a good
-thing I found out in time how I was being deceived by a pair of eyes
-and a mouth that says one thing and means another!"</p>
-
-<p>"And I suppose you're the soul of honor! With no thought of
-responsibility to your fellow man! You've had your way all your life,
-and it's lucky I found <i>that</i> out, too&mdash;before&mdash;before...."</p>
-
-<p>But he was gone, elbowing his way through the crowd, and the onlookers
-drifted away, embarrassed at the sight of the stormy girl who shouted
-hysterically after him. Bridget slammed the door and collapsed into a
-chair.</p>
-
-<p>"I'm sorry for the noise," she apologized when the officer returned.
-"I'd better finish checking the plants before it's time to land."</p>
-
-<p>"Never mind the plants," the lieutenant told her. "I've put them where
-he won't find them in a hurry. As a matter of fact, we aren't going
-to land. We're in orbit now and they're to send a rocket shuttle. They
-aren't worried about what we're bringing in this time. It's what we
-might take out. There's a howling plague on New Eden after all. Several
-of our passengers have changed their minds about landing."</p>
-
-<p>"A plague?" said Bridget stupidly. It was hard to concentrate on
-anything more deadly than the golden nematode.</p>
-
-<p>"Oh, nothing you or I could catch. Something to do with agriculture
-and the plants. Which reminds me, I've a batch of telegrams for you.
-The authorities are delighted to learn we've a registered entomologist
-aboard. Very few of them have come this way."</p>
-
-<p>By the time Bridget had read the sheaf of papers, she had made the
-transition from the world of shipboard romance to her accustomed world
-of science and order. There was work to be done. Her talents were
-needed in a dozen places at once. She left orders for the confiscated
-clovers to be destroyed and went to her cabin to pack. She was on the
-first shuttle to leave the ship.</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>The weeks that followed were filled with hard work with test tube
-and microscope, at her desk and in the field. The majority of her
-co-workers were men, but none had time to look for a laughing eye or
-a smiling mouth. The beautiful garden planet of New Eden was being
-reduced to a desert by a mysterious <i>something</i> that was swiftly
-attacking all the cultivated areas. Starvation was looming and there
-was talk of hasty evacuation. The situation was passing out of control.</p>
-
-<p>The villain could not be isolated. Was it an insect, a virus, a
-chemical in the soil? Some of the few native insects were caught and
-subjected to experiment. The soils were analyzed and tested. Those were
-not the answer. The only thing certain was that the previously lush
-brown loam was turning to a yellow, chalky sand, and everything that
-grew in it withered and died.</p>
-
-<p>Bridget visited farm after farm and trudged from field to field. She
-looked at worried faces and tried to think of words of encouragement.
-Back at the laboratory she studied her specimens far into the night
-and fell asleep at her desk. She was too tired to think about Patch
-Maguire, who, she concluded, had never left the spaceship. What would a
-grower of gardens, a breeder of plants do in a spreading desert? He had
-gone on to some more flourishing planet.</p>
-
-<p>She was called to the office one day.</p>
-
-<p>"I hear there's a farm that claims they don't have the plague," said
-the harassed young scientist behind the desk. "Better get over there
-and see if it's any more than a rumor. Take the heli and bring back all
-the usual samples. Here's the directions on getting there."</p>
-
-<p>He shoved a torn piece of paper at her and turned back to his cluttered
-desk. Bridget picked up her collecting kit and climbed into the cab
-of the machine. By this time she knew her way about the settlements.
-Without doubt, she told herself, this farm was on the outskirts of
-civilization, in some valley as yet untouched by the plague. But long
-before she reached the limits of cultivated land, she could see her
-destination. It stood out like an oasis in the desert, a little patch
-of green between a dried-up cornfield and an expanse of stricken wheat.</p>
-
-<p>Bridget brought her heli down on a velvety lawn in front of a small
-cottage and walked, unbelieving, to the door. A shout from within
-welcomed her and she entered a clean and simple kitchen-parlor. The
-owner of the one healthy farm in New Eden was busy in the attached
-greenhouse.</p>
-
-<p>As she glimpsed the red waistcoat dangling from a hook, Bridget
-screamed, and Patch Maguire came through the greenhouse door, a flower
-pot in one hand, trowel in the other.</p>
-
-<p>"And if it isn't the worm-hunter herself!" he cried. "The czar of the
-spaceways! The dandelion dictator! And I was wondering how long it
-would take you to find me out."</p>
-
-<p>"But you&mdash;" she gasped. "You couldn't&mdash;you wouldn't&mdash;aren't supposed to
-be here!"</p>
-
-<p>"And why not?" he countered. "I'm not like Carrie, she'd rather go on
-too sick to eat in space than face starvation on this planet. And then
-the bargain I was offered for this place&mdash;you wouldn't believe it! All
-modern conveniences and they were practically giving it away. Besides,
-what had I to fear with the best entomologist in five solar systems
-working for the Department of Agriculture? Sure, you'll be having the
-problem solved in no time!"</p>
-
-<p>"Don't be giving me that blarney!" Bridget said. "You need only look
-out the window to know we've solved nothing at all. And you sitting
-here crowing to yourself! You've been breeding plague-resistant plants,
-that's what you've done, and keeping them all to yourself! It's a
-disgrace!"</p>
-
-<p>Patch began to laugh, and the more he laughed, the angrier Bridget got.</p>
-
-<p>"You should be ashamed!" she shouted. "The whole planet dying and you
-sitting here growing greener all the time!"</p>
-
-<p>"And that's the way it's been," he assured her. "This place was dying
-on me, too. But only the last few days it's taken a new lease and I'm
-at my wit's end to explain it."</p>
-
-<p>"You mean you don't <i>want</i> to explain it. You're hoarding the secret,
-and it's a shameful thing!"</p>
-
-<p>"Woman, you're crazy!" he bellowed at her. "I'm no magician to breed a
-plague-resistant plant overnight. It takes patience and many seasons,
-and I've only just settled in. I put a few things in the garden and
-stirred things up in the potting shed. Here, come along&mdash;you can see
-for yourself."</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>He drew her through the cottage, pointing out the advantages of the
-kitchen so near the greenhouse. She walked about the paths and felt of
-the rich brown soil without a streak of yellow, and finally her eyes
-fell upon some little low leaves by the back step.</p>
-
-<p>"Patch," she demanded, "what's that?"</p>
-
-<p>"You've the eagle eye, to be sure. What do you suppose it is?"</p>
-
-<p>"It's clover," she said. "Shamrock to you. Surely not the same
-shamrock! I gave strict orders!"</p>
-
-<p>Before he could stop her, she had tugged a plant up by the roots and
-pulled out her pocket microscope as she bent over it.</p>
-
-<p>"Sure, they were so busy worrying about the plague here, they forgot
-all about the little plague from Earth. And all I wanted was a bit
-of old Ireland to bring with me. A few little cysts couldn't be that
-important. And you've got to admit that's what I've got&mdash;a green
-island!"</p>
-
-<p>"The idiots!" screamed Bridget. "The irresponsible, shirking,
-doublefaced&mdash;"</p>
-
-<p>Her hand went up and Patch dodged involuntarily, expecting her to throw
-shamrock, dirt and all right at his head. But her hand stopped in
-midair.</p>
-
-<p>"Patch!" Her voice fell to a whisper of incredulity. "I think I've got
-the answer here in my hand. Don't say a word till I'm sure, but get
-me soil samples from all over your place&mdash;there&mdash;and over there&mdash;and
-<i>hurry</i>!"</p>
-
-<p>Patch ran back and forth with the soil samples and Bridget looked in
-her microscope, and everywhere the golden nematode was teeming and
-nowhere was there a sign of the sinister yellow streaks.</p>
-
-<p>"Don't you see?" Bridget said. "Whatever it is, the nematodes are
-killing it."</p>
-
-<p>"It will take some experimenting to prove it, but Bridget, my girl, I
-believe you're right."</p>
-
-<p>"And while they're proving it, Patch, you and I are going to breed
-nematodes right here."</p>
-
-<p>And she had a vision of the golden horde, burrowing from Patch's
-land in all directions, bringing back health and sanity to the land.
-Whatever would Professor Schwarzkopf say? Dear Professor Schwarzkopf!
-Sometimes the watchdogs are too faithful. They keep out everyone&mdash;even
-our friends.</p>
-
-<p>And that was how New Eden was saved. And the nematodes prospered and
-the Maguires prospered and the shamrocks grew everywhere. And so there
-was nothing for it but to call the planet New Ireland.</p>
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-<pre>
-
-
-
-
-
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-The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Great Day for the Irish, by A. M. Lightner
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-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
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-
-
-Title: A Great Day for the Irish
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-Author: A. M. Lightner
-
-Release Date: December 4, 2019 [EBook #60846]
-
-Language: English
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-Character set encoding: ASCII
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-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A GREAT DAY FOR THE IRISH ***
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-Produced by Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online
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-
- A GREAT DAY FOR THE IRISH
-
- By A. M. LIGHTNER
-
- _Watchdogs have to be
- watched or they keep everything
- out--including our friends!_
-
- [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from
- Worlds of If Science Fiction, May 1960.
- Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that
- the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]
-
-
-Bridget Kelly stood at the foot of the rocket lift and watched the
-loading operation. The freight had long since been inspected and
-stowed, and now it was the passengers' turn. Bridget was glad that for
-once she was not responsible. Let others worry and snoop. This time she
-was a passenger herself, starward bound. Inspected, passed and okayed,
-she could have the pleasure of watching others squirm.
-
-Like that beauty coming aboard with the furs and the orchid. She
-wouldn't be allowed to keep the orchid, of course. Bridget grinned as
-she saw the flower tossed into a trash can and imagined the words the
-beauty was mouthing. The man beside her sported a boutonniere. Yes,
-there it went into the can. He was still smiling, probably cracking
-wise. Bridget had separated so many travelers from so many items that
-she could tell what the passenger was going to say before he said it.
-
-Most people knew that strenuous efforts were being made to keep pests
-and epidemics away from Earth. Ever since the beginnings of space
-travel, the quarantine of incoming ships at the Moon had been rigidly
-observed. But the fact that plagues could also spread _from_ Earth
-seldom registered on the public's mind.
-
-Bridget was all too well aware of it. For several years she had
-labored to that end in the Quarantine Service. Now that her savings
-had accumulated and her abilities as an entomologist were recognized,
-she was about to board one of the shining ships herself. There were
-raised eyebrows when her destination was known. An entomologist going
-to New Eden--a planet where insects were at a minimum. But Bridget only
-smiled. She knew what she wanted. She was bound for the frontier, where
-men are men and women are scarce.
-
-The speaker blared. The countdown was beginning.
-
-"Fifteen minutes!" rasped the mechanical voice. "Fifteen minutes to
-blast-off!"
-
- * * * * *
-
-She took a last look at the planet of her birth and squeezed into the
-lift. The few remaining passengers pushed in with her. A man in a red
-waistcoat was commiserating with the woman beside him.
-
-"Don't let the officials get you down," he said. "We'll have to put up
-with them for the journey. But on New Eden, I hear, the conditions are
-so good they hardly need any regulations at all."
-
-"It isn't that," sniffed his friend. "It's just that you gave it to me
-and I was hoping to wear it tonight."
-
-"Perhaps I can buy you something in hydroponics. I had no idea they
-were so touchy or I'd have had the orchid fumigated."
-
-Bridget felt the scorn of the official for the general public. "If
-you're going to New Eden, you ought to know we want to keep it that
-way."
-
-The red waistcoat looked down at her.
-
-"Oh, officialdom without stripes?" he said. "Or are you an old hand?
-Perhaps you can explain the deal before we get there."
-
-So he _was_ the type that cracked wise, and she had put her foot in it
-right at the beginning.
-
-"I've never been off Earth before," she admitted. "I read up on it all
-first."
-
-The lift was at the lock door, and she slipped through without looking
-back. The speaker was croaking "Ten minutes to go" as she hurried to
-her cabin and prepared for takeoff. She'd have to do better than this
-or the trip would be a washout. Better just concentrate on enjoying
-it ... the new experiences ... the fascination of travel.
-
-The jets roared and Bridget Kelly blacked out.
-
-Several hours later she had recovered enough to spruce up, take the
-prescribed dose of covitron against space sickness, and make her way
-to the lounge. She found the table setting with her name on it and had
-hardly sat down before a familiar voice began at her ear.
-
-"Sure and if it isn't Bridget Kelly, and it's a long time I've been
-waiting for herself."
-
-She looked up into the same laughing eyes, only this time they were
-above an emerald-green waistcoat.
-
-"Still determined that New Eden shall not be polluted by snakes? Oh,
-excuse me, that was St. Patrick. You're worried about bugs."
-
-She laughed in spite of herself and glanced at the place card next
-hers. "Mr. Patch Maguire," it read.
-
-"I didn't mean to sound stuffy," she said. "It's just that most people
-don't realize how important it is ... how much trouble just a few
-insects ... well, I've worked at it and I ought to know."
-
-"Ah, an official entomologist. But in that case, why New Eden? Or
-are you insurance against people like Carrie and me who might import
-something?"
-
-"You never can tell. Something may turn up. It's hard to imagine a
-planet without any insects at all."
-
-"Eden's remarkable that way," put in the young officer sitting across
-from them. "No stinging bugs or parasites. Makes everything a lot more
-comfortable. Still, it's pretty new. Only a small part developed so
-far."
-
-"So we've insurance against the unknown in Bridget Kelly."
-
-"And what might _you_ be insurance against, Mr. Maguire?" she countered.
-
- * * * * *
-
-The officer stared. "Don't you folks know each other? Mr. Maguire's a
-grower of fancy plants. Sort of goes together ... plants and insects!"
-He laughed. "Well, it looks like the rest of our table won't show up
-for this meal."
-
-"What happened to the lady without the orchid? She was with you, wasn't
-she?" Bridget asked.
-
-"Carrie," said Patch Maguire, "is one of those unfortunates on whom
-covitron does not work. She won't be with anyone for the duration. I
-was just hoping our whole table was not similarly afflicted."
-
-"It's a pity," mused the young officer. "So many people make the flight
-across space only once. If they did it more often, they might get
-accustomed."
-
-"Don't you take covitron?" Bridget asked, beginning to wonder how soon
-she should repeat the dose. Some people said it made you sleepy, and
-she certainly didn't want that with things just getting started ... and
-Patch Maguire ... Patch Maguire....
-
-Suddenly a window opened in her mind. She saw a letter with short
-punching sentences. "You think you can get away with this high-handed,
-overbearing, totally uncalled-for destruction of property? I'll take
-it to the top! I'll see you idiots in hell ... or at least out of the
-Service!" Patch Maguire protesting the destruction of his shipment of
-seeds imported from Regulus V. No amount of explanation that the seeds
-had been found to harbor a blight which, once let loose on Earth....
-Patch Maguire had a reputation as an authority on crossbreeding and
-mutation of plants ... and also for throwing his weight around. It was
-several years ago, but Bridget remembered the consternation in the
-department.
-
-She realized that Maguire and the officer were talking. They were
-agreeing that space sickness was only a matter of psychology, and that
-if you just didn't think about it, no covitron was necessary. She
-hastily swallowed another pill with her coffee and hoped the coffee
-would keep her awake.
-
-They toured the ship together, she and Patch. They marveled at the
-scene from the viewport and chatted with the captain in the control
-room. The steward inquired about his taste in music and stereo, and he
-even gave advice to the gardeners in hydroponics. All doors were open
-to Patch, and there were murmurs about the "handsome couple" as they
-moved through the lounge. By the end of the trip they were making plans
-for New Eden. Patch insisted that Bridget was in the wrong profession
-and she agreed that the science of agriculture might be more rewarding
-than entomology under certain conditions.
-
-At the farewell dinner, Patch gave her a bouquet he'd had made up
-especially by the gardeners. But she was more interested in the small
-green leaf he wore in his lapel. He took it out and insisted on
-fastening it in her hair.
-
-"Sure and it's a shamrock!" he cried, as he arranged it. "And have you
-forgotten what day it is tomorrow?"
-
-"It's the day we land," Bridget replied. "But what day that is in our
-time or ship's time ... it's too confusing!"
-
-"It's St. Patrick's Day, that's what it is!" he said. "A great day
-for the Irish and a great day for us. And I wouldn't be without the
-shamrock on St. Patrick's Day! They should call the planet New Ireland,
-that they should. Wasn't Ireland the garden island, all green and
-fruitful and with no snakes? And I hear this planet's the garden planet
-and with no insects either to make life miserable. But let you and me
-be living there a while and we'll make it New Ireland for sure!"
-
-And he planted a kiss on her mouth without a thought of who was looking
-at them.
-
- * * * * *
-
-As their tablemates drank their health, Bridget blushed and her eyes
-shone, and after dinner Patch escorted her to the stereo where they sat
-very close together in the dark. But as the pictures flashed across
-the screen and as Patch's arm went across her shoulder and drew her
-close, her mind was besieged by an army of little doubts. Shamrock ...
-shamrock ... what had she read about the shamrock?
-
-"Patch," she whispered. "Where did you get it?"
-
-"Get what?" Patch murmured, bending over to kiss her.
-
-"The shamrock, Patch? I don't believe they have it in hydroponics."
-
-"Sure, they must have it." Patch's lips brushed hers and she found it
-difficult to think clearly.
-
-"I never saw it there. Patch! Are you sure?"
-
-"Saw what? I don't see anything but you. That's enough for me."
-
-"About the shamrock, Patch!"
-
-"It looks beautiful on you. Sure and I wouldn't be without a shamrock
-on St. Patrick's Day."
-
-Bridget gave up. She lay back in the sanctuary of his arm and basked in
-the warm feeling of his lips on her hair. But the doubts kept crawling
-about in her mind. What was the matter with her? Couldn't she be happy
-when everything was perfect? Had she been a cut-and-dried inspector for
-too many years? But she remembered the words of Professor Schwarzkopf,
-the day she received her degree: "The inspectors are the watchdogs of
-the planets. Without them, all that man has built can be destroyed."
-
-When Patch had kissed her good night outside her cabin and his
-footsteps had died away along the corridor, she crept out into the
-passage and made her way to hydroponics.
-
-"Why, no," said the chief gardener, "we never carry clover of any sort.
-Why do you ask?"
-
-On her way to the control room, Bridget tried not to think. She found
-the young officer from her table on duty with the captain, and the two
-men listened in surprise as she outlined her fears.
-
-"I don't want to accuse Mr. Maguire of anything," she said. "I'm sure
-he doesn't realize how serious--and of course there may be nothing
-to it. It's just that I remember that shamrocks harbor the golden
-nematode--that is, in the soil around the roots. And it seems likely
-that if Mr. Maguire has live shamrocks--and I remember what a serious
-plague they once brought over from Ireland to America...."
-
-The captain pulled his mustache. "It's clearly against regulations. I
-can't imagine how he'd get it past inspection. But then, Maguire's a
-very persistent man and he's got pull in odd places. I don't want to
-rouse the ire of the Irish, but I see your point."
-
-"Couldn't you search his cabin--without his knowing I said to? Oh, I'm
-sure he'd be very angry. But if I could only look at his plants, then
-I'd be sure if they're safe. You must have ways of getting in--if there
-should be a short circuit or something in his cabin."
-
-"Oh, we have ways," the captain said. "Don't we, Lieutenant?"
-
-"Perhaps at breakfast," suggested the young officer. "If Miss Kelly
-could arrange to make it as leisurely as possible."
-
-"And right afterward you might go to the lieutenant's cabin--with your
-instruments and without Mr. Maguire."
-
- * * * * *
-
-She had no trouble in making her breakfast leisurely. She could hardly
-choke it down. Under Patch's admiring gaze and flagrant approval she
-was uncomfortably conscious of treachery. She left as soon as the
-protracted meal was over, even though she knew it would give him the
-opportunity to discover the rape of his plants.
-
-The lieutenant was waiting for her in his cabin. He sat behind his desk
-eyeing a motley collection of clover in an assortment of little jars
-and boxes. Bridget brought out her pocket 'scope and without a word
-pulled the first specimen up by the roots and began to examine it. The
-lieutenant watched in fascination.
-
-"It's a good thing Mr. Maguire can't see you now," he said. "He'd take
-an entirely different tone from the one I've been hearing lately."
-
-"I'm hoping he doesn't find out," she muttered. "What he doesn't
-know.... Oh! Oh! Look here! A fine big cyst! Now if they're all like
-this...."
-
-The lieutenant's face took on a look of respect. He came around
-from behind his desk and peered over her shoulder. "Found something
-already?" he asked.
-
-Bridget pushed the scope under his nose. "See that?" she said. "In the
-right-hand corner."
-
-"You mean that lump? Doesn't look very dangerous."
-
-"No, it doesn't. But it's a nematode cyst, all right. That little brown
-lump, if turned loose in the soil--give it a few years and you'll have
-a real pest on your hands."
-
-"You don't say. We'd better get rid of it right away. Do you think
-there's any more?"
-
-"That's just what I'm going to find out."
-
-But before she could move to the desk for the other containers there
-was a sound of scuffling outside, the door was flung violently open,
-and a rich, Irish voice proclaimed in righteous anger: "So here you
-are, conspiring against me! Both the culprits red-handed! And my
-shamrocks, my little plants, my babies! Thank heavens I got here in
-time!"
-
-The lieutenant moved to intercept him. "I beg your pardon, sir, but
-these plants are in quarantine, and if you have any others we haven't
-found--"
-
-"You're no true daughter of Ireland, Bridget Kelly. And I'm fortunate
-to have found you out in time, false and faithless as you are!"
-
-"Now, now," cautioned the lieutenant, getting between Maguire and the
-desk. "She was only doing her duty. You should see the things she's
-been showing me in her microscope. A menace to the whole planet!"
-
-"Don't you believe a word of it!" thundered Maguire. "These inspectors
-are full of fears and fancies. Puffed up with their own importance.
-And I'll thank you to give me back my plants that you stole out of my
-cabin."
-
-"I'm afraid I can't do that," the lieutenant said. "Not until Miss
-Kelly has examined each one--and then only the ones that get a clean
-bill of health." And he began to collect the little pots and remove
-them as far as possible from Maguire's reach.
-
-"Well, come along then, Bridget--give them the bill of health," Maguire
-ordered. "You'll do that for me, I'm sure. And I don't know what all
-the fuss is about either, all over a few little plants, and shamrocks
-at that."
-
-"The few little plants have a few little cysts all through their
-roots," said Bridget, whose temper was wearing thin. "I've only looked
-at one so far, but as nice an infestation of the golden nematode I've
-seldom seen. It's got to go down the incinerator."
-
-"The incinerator!" screamed Maguire. "Woman! My shamrocks! All the way
-from Ireland!"
-
-"If you hadn't spent your whole life circumventing regulations and
-pulling wires, this wouldn't have happened. Why didn't you get them
-treated and certified before coming aboard?"
-
- * * * * *
-
-"Because there wasn't time, that's why!" Patch shouted. "They only came
-from Ireland as I was leaving for the ship. If it hadn't been for a
-snooping, sniveling worry-wart--all about a worm that you can't even
-see...."
-
-"You can see the results right enough!" Bridget's voice was rising to
-match his. "Did you ever hear of the Long Island potato? The best on
-the East Coast they were. The golden nematode ruined Long Island for
-potatoes. That's what the shamrock did for America! That's a sneaking,
-treacherous worm for you!"
-
-"And who would want to grow potatoes on Long Island, built up into a
-city as it is?"
-
-"They're going to want to grow potatoes on New Eden, and I'm here to
-see they can."
-
-"If that's all that's worrying you, I'll breed you a nematode-resistant
-potato. And now I'll thank you to let me take my shamrocks and make an
-end to this disgraceful scene."
-
-But when he looked around, he found the lieutenant had quietly removed
-himself with the plants, and the door of the cabin was crowded with
-interested passengers.
-
-"So you think you've put one over on me!" Patch shouted. "It's a good
-thing I found out in time how I was being deceived by a pair of eyes
-and a mouth that says one thing and means another!"
-
-"And I suppose you're the soul of honor! With no thought of
-responsibility to your fellow man! You've had your way all your life,
-and it's lucky I found _that_ out, too--before--before...."
-
-But he was gone, elbowing his way through the crowd, and the onlookers
-drifted away, embarrassed at the sight of the stormy girl who shouted
-hysterically after him. Bridget slammed the door and collapsed into a
-chair.
-
-"I'm sorry for the noise," she apologized when the officer returned.
-"I'd better finish checking the plants before it's time to land."
-
-"Never mind the plants," the lieutenant told her. "I've put them where
-he won't find them in a hurry. As a matter of fact, we aren't going
-to land. We're in orbit now and they're to send a rocket shuttle. They
-aren't worried about what we're bringing in this time. It's what we
-might take out. There's a howling plague on New Eden after all. Several
-of our passengers have changed their minds about landing."
-
-"A plague?" said Bridget stupidly. It was hard to concentrate on
-anything more deadly than the golden nematode.
-
-"Oh, nothing you or I could catch. Something to do with agriculture
-and the plants. Which reminds me, I've a batch of telegrams for you.
-The authorities are delighted to learn we've a registered entomologist
-aboard. Very few of them have come this way."
-
-By the time Bridget had read the sheaf of papers, she had made the
-transition from the world of shipboard romance to her accustomed world
-of science and order. There was work to be done. Her talents were
-needed in a dozen places at once. She left orders for the confiscated
-clovers to be destroyed and went to her cabin to pack. She was on the
-first shuttle to leave the ship.
-
- * * * * *
-
-The weeks that followed were filled with hard work with test tube
-and microscope, at her desk and in the field. The majority of her
-co-workers were men, but none had time to look for a laughing eye or
-a smiling mouth. The beautiful garden planet of New Eden was being
-reduced to a desert by a mysterious _something_ that was swiftly
-attacking all the cultivated areas. Starvation was looming and there
-was talk of hasty evacuation. The situation was passing out of control.
-
-The villain could not be isolated. Was it an insect, a virus, a
-chemical in the soil? Some of the few native insects were caught and
-subjected to experiment. The soils were analyzed and tested. Those were
-not the answer. The only thing certain was that the previously lush
-brown loam was turning to a yellow, chalky sand, and everything that
-grew in it withered and died.
-
-Bridget visited farm after farm and trudged from field to field. She
-looked at worried faces and tried to think of words of encouragement.
-Back at the laboratory she studied her specimens far into the night
-and fell asleep at her desk. She was too tired to think about Patch
-Maguire, who, she concluded, had never left the spaceship. What would a
-grower of gardens, a breeder of plants do in a spreading desert? He had
-gone on to some more flourishing planet.
-
-She was called to the office one day.
-
-"I hear there's a farm that claims they don't have the plague," said
-the harassed young scientist behind the desk. "Better get over there
-and see if it's any more than a rumor. Take the heli and bring back all
-the usual samples. Here's the directions on getting there."
-
-He shoved a torn piece of paper at her and turned back to his cluttered
-desk. Bridget picked up her collecting kit and climbed into the cab
-of the machine. By this time she knew her way about the settlements.
-Without doubt, she told herself, this farm was on the outskirts of
-civilization, in some valley as yet untouched by the plague. But long
-before she reached the limits of cultivated land, she could see her
-destination. It stood out like an oasis in the desert, a little patch
-of green between a dried-up cornfield and an expanse of stricken wheat.
-
-Bridget brought her heli down on a velvety lawn in front of a small
-cottage and walked, unbelieving, to the door. A shout from within
-welcomed her and she entered a clean and simple kitchen-parlor. The
-owner of the one healthy farm in New Eden was busy in the attached
-greenhouse.
-
-As she glimpsed the red waistcoat dangling from a hook, Bridget
-screamed, and Patch Maguire came through the greenhouse door, a flower
-pot in one hand, trowel in the other.
-
-"And if it isn't the worm-hunter herself!" he cried. "The czar of the
-spaceways! The dandelion dictator! And I was wondering how long it
-would take you to find me out."
-
-"But you--" she gasped. "You couldn't--you wouldn't--aren't supposed to
-be here!"
-
-"And why not?" he countered. "I'm not like Carrie, she'd rather go on
-too sick to eat in space than face starvation on this planet. And then
-the bargain I was offered for this place--you wouldn't believe it! All
-modern conveniences and they were practically giving it away. Besides,
-what had I to fear with the best entomologist in five solar systems
-working for the Department of Agriculture? Sure, you'll be having the
-problem solved in no time!"
-
-"Don't be giving me that blarney!" Bridget said. "You need only look
-out the window to know we've solved nothing at all. And you sitting
-here crowing to yourself! You've been breeding plague-resistant plants,
-that's what you've done, and keeping them all to yourself! It's a
-disgrace!"
-
-Patch began to laugh, and the more he laughed, the angrier Bridget got.
-
-"You should be ashamed!" she shouted. "The whole planet dying and you
-sitting here growing greener all the time!"
-
-"And that's the way it's been," he assured her. "This place was dying
-on me, too. But only the last few days it's taken a new lease and I'm
-at my wit's end to explain it."
-
-"You mean you don't _want_ to explain it. You're hoarding the secret,
-and it's a shameful thing!"
-
-"Woman, you're crazy!" he bellowed at her. "I'm no magician to breed a
-plague-resistant plant overnight. It takes patience and many seasons,
-and I've only just settled in. I put a few things in the garden and
-stirred things up in the potting shed. Here, come along--you can see
-for yourself."
-
- * * * * *
-
-He drew her through the cottage, pointing out the advantages of the
-kitchen so near the greenhouse. She walked about the paths and felt of
-the rich brown soil without a streak of yellow, and finally her eyes
-fell upon some little low leaves by the back step.
-
-"Patch," she demanded, "what's that?"
-
-"You've the eagle eye, to be sure. What do you suppose it is?"
-
-"It's clover," she said. "Shamrock to you. Surely not the same
-shamrock! I gave strict orders!"
-
-Before he could stop her, she had tugged a plant up by the roots and
-pulled out her pocket microscope as she bent over it.
-
-"Sure, they were so busy worrying about the plague here, they forgot
-all about the little plague from Earth. And all I wanted was a bit
-of old Ireland to bring with me. A few little cysts couldn't be that
-important. And you've got to admit that's what I've got--a green
-island!"
-
-"The idiots!" screamed Bridget. "The irresponsible, shirking,
-doublefaced--"
-
-Her hand went up and Patch dodged involuntarily, expecting her to throw
-shamrock, dirt and all right at his head. But her hand stopped in
-midair.
-
-"Patch!" Her voice fell to a whisper of incredulity. "I think I've got
-the answer here in my hand. Don't say a word till I'm sure, but get
-me soil samples from all over your place--there--and over there--and
-_hurry_!"
-
-Patch ran back and forth with the soil samples and Bridget looked in
-her microscope, and everywhere the golden nematode was teeming and
-nowhere was there a sign of the sinister yellow streaks.
-
-"Don't you see?" Bridget said. "Whatever it is, the nematodes are
-killing it."
-
-"It will take some experimenting to prove it, but Bridget, my girl, I
-believe you're right."
-
-"And while they're proving it, Patch, you and I are going to breed
-nematodes right here."
-
-And she had a vision of the golden horde, burrowing from Patch's
-land in all directions, bringing back health and sanity to the land.
-Whatever would Professor Schwarzkopf say? Dear Professor Schwarzkopf!
-Sometimes the watchdogs are too faithful. They keep out everyone--even
-our friends.
-
-And that was how New Eden was saved. And the nematodes prospered and
-the Maguires prospered and the shamrocks grew everywhere. And so there
-was nothing for it but to call the planet New Ireland.
-
-
-
-
-
-End of Project Gutenberg's A Great Day for the Irish, by A. M. Lightner
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